#I literally don’t know what else to tag I’ve never posted or reblog anything with die hard but I love that movie and I love Hans Gruber bro

[mc-tummy-blur]

The holiday season maybe be over but my obsession with Hans Gruber is all year round baby

Click for better quality

Check my pinned post to see how you can help the people of Palestine

[ffc1cb]

new art blog

the short version:

1. i made a new art blog: @cbge;

2. @ffc1cb will stay up as an archive.

the long version:

hi everyone. this announcement is somewhat late, since the blog in question has been up for a few months now, and i’ve already started posting art on it. the reason it took me so long to “reveal” it is because i’ve been trying to figure out whether a new blog is something i actually want, or if it's just me throwing darts at a board, trying to make myself feel better somehow.

i don’t know when precisely it all started, but ever since sometime last year i’ve been going through a hard time, both emotionally and creatively. i’m not sure whether being depressed is what made art harder, or art becoming harder is what made me depressed (a bit of both, i think), but lately, drawing has been a struggle. 

i’ve found myself having less and less energy for art, and this lack of energy resulted in poorer quality of drawings, which resulted in me feeling like i’m getting worse at it, despite my efforts. i knew i could make good art, art that i’m proud of - i’ve done so countless times before, - but somehow it felt like i just couldn’t anymore, like my hands forgot how to. nothing looked right. 

i’ve been trying to experiment. i’ve learned some new things, tried this and that - it was enlightening, to say the least, and even though i kind of liked how it looked, it made me feel a sense of displacement. i was at odds with myself, my art, and how i felt about it, when previously i was always in sync. i was making art, yes, and it looked nice, but it felt like it wasn’t mine.

i suppose part of it was also the growing lack of engagement, and i don’t mean likes and reblogs - i never particularly cared about those. they are all just numbers to me; dry and impersonal. what i’m talking about is actual, human interactions: personal thoughts in tags, asks, replies, etc. a conversation. 

i don’t mean to sound “old” or anything, but i remember when talking to artists online was more commonplace. my wife tells me it’s because the internet culture has changed over the years, that people have become more reclusive, less willing to be open with their thoughts, and she's probably right, but in my slump i find it hard to believe. somehow it feels like it’s my fault for being less “engaging���, for seeming unapproachable or perhaps intimidating. maybe it’s “just a skill issue”, maybe it’s because i have stopped churning out fanart for popular fandoms, maybe it’s because i refuse to torture myself emotionally by having an art account on twitter (i can’t fucking stand the place anymore; i still post nsfw art there, but only because it’s literally one of the only places on the internet that allows you to do so. i miss when you could post female presenting tits on tumblr).

i have always, ever since i started posting art on the internet back in 2012, done it for human connection. i wanted to talk to people, and have people talk to me. i wanted to inspire people with my art, and i wanted to bring them comfort. i wanted to elicit an emotional response, and have people tell me about it. it was one of the main reasons i drew in the first place; having lost that, i’ve been struggling to stay passionate about making art.

i miss being a small artist on the internet during the 2010s. i remember when i could make a post going, “hey everyone, how are you all doing today?” and it would not seem weird to people in the slightest. it is just me? does anyone else feel that way? am i too deep in my own head? the internet feels so unwelcoming nowadays, especially to artists. we are all just content machines; people scroll by our stuff, or maybe look at it for half a second and leave a like before scrolling away. i know it’s unfair to demand people’s attention, especially now when our lives are already so overwhelmed by everything - no one has the energy to pay closer attention; i myself am not immune to mindless scrolling. but it feels bad. i wish we were all sincere and enthusiastic again.

anyway (sorry for rambling. i hope i haven’t bored you to death), you might want to say, okay, but how is making a new art blog on a “dying” social platform going to help with any of that? the truth is, i don’t know. i just felt like i needed a change. 

i’ve been running this blog since 2016 (that’s almost 8 full years!). i feel incredibly attached to it, but at the same time, i feel it weighing me down. 

there are people who followed me years ago for one specific thing, still expecting me to post about said thing (i still find it mindboggling that some people follow artists for a specific fandom only, but that is a whole other matter for a whole other post that i will never write). a third, if not half, of my following are probably dead blogs. and with my current struggle with trying to regain the joy i once felt for making art, looking back at all the art i’ve done over the years makes me feel tired. i still love it all; it’s all very dear to me. i’m proud of it; looking at it makes me mourn my younger and more passionate self.

so i’ve decided to make a new blog, where i will let myself post whatever i want, in whatever stage of donness i feel like. maybe it will help me, somehow. maybe it won’t. but if you care about my art, if you want to keep following me on my artistic journey, i welcome you to join me there. similarly, feel free not to - no hard feelings.

thank you everyone for your support over the years; it matters a lot to me. i’m not planning to delete or private this blog; it will stay up, and i will still be reachable on here. i will still answer asks, if there will be any. i’m just not planning to post any art here anymore. this is it for my dear old friend ffc1cb.

i can be found in other places:

@cbge, as mentioned earlier,

@k0nstanta, an art blog dedicated solely to my wife and i’s ocs,

@inquisimail, a dragon age ask blog that has become my dragon age sideblog in general,

and multiple other blogs, none of which are art related, but feel free to ask, if you’re curious.

thank you very much for reading all of this. i hope you have a wonderful day.

[thedvilsinthedetails]

Heyyyy…

hey im still figuring out what i wanna be called but for now u can call me Jamie if u want I’m genderfluid as fuck [they/she/he or whatever idegafatp]

some typa aroace spectrum probs grayace & demiromantic also omniromantic - in general I have nothing figured out

so a simp w like a slight preference for men ig but kinda ace most of the time but sometimes very not

neurospicy bitch

writing request status: OPEN FOR MICROFICS RN

I’m a rosekiller loverrr but also a multi shipper so u never know what ur gonna see ig [but probably Rosekiller, Wolfstar, Dorlene, Starchaser maybe some sunkiller if I’m in the mood etc] for the record just bc I don’t ship smth doesn’t mean I support hating it even as a joke [translation: prongsfoot is chill leave them be]

if u don’t like smth, just ignore it, if u send me hate I’ll reply w shitty jokes probs

my dream job is to be an actor [screen actor specifically]

Media I like:

Fav TV stuff: Challengers, Gravity Falls, Cruella, 10 things I hate about you, into the spiderverse

Fav author is @neil-gaiman also that man is my idol so I’ll probs reblog him a shit ton [do u think he’ll like…mind that I tagged him? Sorry if this bothered u Neil!!!] Music [uhhh changes all the time tbh but for rn]: The Neighbourhood, Olivia Rodrigo, Conan Gray [Kid Krow phase rn], Chappell Roan, Renée Rapp, Green day, Ricky Montgomery, NOAHFINNCE, MARINA and Hozier

Spider-Man. Fucking love Spider-Man.

One thing to note about me tho: obvi I love recommendations but I find starting literally any new forms of media really fucking daunting for no reason [this is everything: songs, movies, books etc]

e.g. I fucking love spider verse but I still haven’t watched movie 2, same w latest season of young royals, same with even like ONE song alone I find it rlly hard and really scary

so if u give me recommendations and I don’t get back to u about them for ages it’s not bc I forgot or i was ignoring u but bc I find it scary so pls be patient :)

also same w please don’t like assume I’m knowledgeable about like any of the music artists I named earlier bc tbh I don’t rlly listen to artists I listen to songs [im still a fan of a lot of music artists ofc but the artists I listen to ≠ the artists I’m a fan of]

HI! welcome to my crazy blog, I love making friends im not at all scary I promise :D

Btw my inbox is ALWAYS open for spam, ship ramblings [even if it’s not smth I ship], info dropping about ur hyperfixations, venting, questions etc. [the only thing is no illegal ships bc it will be ignored] also sorry pre warning im shit with the inbox chains [‘send this to ten people who…’] so often I won’t answer those sorry, anything else I will make sure to answer but the chains I sometimes just forget about sorryyy

Barty Crouch Jr & James Potter kinnie

got a FAT crush on Evan Rosier [he’s the loml he just doesn’t know it yet] and also a crush on Dorcas Meadowes

I write sometimes:

I fell for you like glitter on stage - rosekiller band au, this was a microfic series on tumblr that I posted on ao3 for convenience [words: 4548] [this is my fav thing I’ve ever written lol]

we are all just prisoners here of our own device - Jegulus, a oneshot on ao3 based on the song ‘hotel California’ by the eagles. [Words: 6162]

Oh where do we begin? The rubble or our sins? - ON HIATUS. Roman Empire Jegulus au with side Rosekiller, Wolfstar and Pandalily on ao3 [words: 6141] [currently I don’t want to write Jegulus - the hyperfixation hath faded]

also I’m in a marauders RP as Barty and u shld follow it bc we’re all super cool and funny and amazing and awesome and yeah @bartythebabygorljr

tags you’ll see on my page:

me and my old black biro > writing tag

Im in love with that Rosier boy > [this is a new one] me having a massive crush on Evan Rosier

the most boring soap opera > my life tag

I have an online diary called @miseryoforpheus if ur fascinated by my charming and irresistible personality

[The song at the bottom of my intro post changes all the time depending on how I’m feeling]

THIS BLOG SUPPORTS PALESTINE

THIS BLOG STANDS WITH UKRAINE

THIS BLOG THINKS JK ROWLING HAS A NEGATIVE QUANTITY OF BRAINCELLS

[candycandy00]

Honestly whoever started the trend of reblogging fics and commenting in the tags… bless you! I genuinely hope all your dreams and wishes come true! And to the lovely people doing it, you are reviving fandom with every reblog! Seriously, fandom was dying, or at least morphing into something far less fun than it was in the past, and you guys are bringing the joy back to it!

I’ve been doing it lately, and I feel terrible that it took me a while to start. And I’m not quite as vocal as some of you but I’m a little shy about this stuff at first. Give me a while to settle in and I’ll be saying a lot more!

But I have to talk about this a little more. Back in my earliest fandom days (late 90’s), I got into writing fanfiction because I stumbled upon a fan forum for fanfiction for a particular anime series. I’d always loved writing and had written a few Sailor Moon and DBZ fanfics that I never posted anywhere. I lurked for a little while on this forum, too shy to say anything. But I noticed everyone was posting their fanfics and everyone else was commenting. Feedback! On fanfics! It looked so fun! So I wrote a fanfic, nervously posted it, and the comments started rolling in. I don’t know if I’ve ever felt such joy before that moment. People were talking about something I wrote!

At that point I got hooked on fanfiction. I could post a fic on the forum or later on fanfiction.net and get lots of comments within one day. It was beautiful!

I’ve talked before about how I left fanfiction for several years to focus on original writing, and how a complete lack of feedback (even to simple likes) made me run back to fanfiction. At first it was great because I was getting tons of likes and even quite a lot of reblogs and occasional comments. But after a while I realized things were different now. Very few comments compared to likes/kudos. And don’t get me wrong, I still love getting likes/kudos! After getting literally nothing for years on my original stuff, every like/kudos is a blessing! But what I actually craved as a writer was comments. Feedback. And it seemed like the fandom landscape had changed to the point that comments were rare. After all, it’s much easier to click like than to comment.

Then, you lovely people, you absolute angels, started reblogging and leaving lengthy comments in the tags! And it feels like nature is healing. Fandom is returning to its former glory. Joy is coming back to fanfiction writing.

If you’re not already doing this, consider trying it! Even just saying a couple of things about the fic will be so special to the writer. Let’s all work together to keep fandom alive and joyful!

[abbyshands]

Hi kit, do you know how to tell if a person sending asks saying they need donations for their family in gaza, is fake?

Cuz someone sent me an ask and I’ve reblogged it but I was going through the comments and there a several blocked and one of them says that the op is scamming people.

I know there are ppl like this that are that horrible, but I wonder if you know how tell them apart ? Or if anyone knows for that matter. Cuz I don’t want to mislead people and give them the wrong information or anything.

hi, honey! this is gonna be all over the place but. i've had this very thing happen to me before as well, maybe three or so asks just like the one you received. i did fall for the first one, but once you see them over and over again, i think it can get easier to tell when it's a scam. one thing to note is when the actual account began to post. i notice a lot of these accounts began to post in recent days or weeks. at the time that i donated to the first person who sent me an ask like this, it was february, and they began to post around mid january. the next tell is one i see a lot, where they'll reblog a bunch of things about palestine, but they will all be in a matter of hours, days, etc. usually never weeks (and also, you'll see that they randomly begin to reblog in very recent days. ex. all their reblogs are from three days ago and onward). one more thing: look at their posts (not their reblogs. their actual posts), and check if it says "some replies may have been blocked, deleted, removed, etc). absolutely, 100% not a good sign. chances are, replies are being removed by the op because they're getting called out for scamming.

the structure of the actual ask is also a dead giveaway. if it ends in "my goal is x amount of money," usually somewhere in the hundreds or thousands, not a good sign. if they are asking you to respond to their ask PRIVATELY, not a good sign. if you copy part of their ask and paste it into tumblr or do an internet search, and you see it elsewhere, not a good sign! these blogs will go around copying the same message into people's inboxes. chances are, someone else on tumblr has posted about the very person who sent you the ask, OR, you will find it somewhere else on the internet, etc a gofundme (which, by the way, is where most of these scammers obtain their story or pictures. they'll find it in gofundmes as i said, articles, etc). before you engage, copy the username of the person who sent you the ask, and paste it into the tumblr search bar. this is how i found out that the first person who sent an ask like this to me was a scammer.

this post here (which i absolutely implore you to read, as it captures what i want to say here much better than i'm doing so right now) explains why there is an abundance of people on tumblr sending asks like this in people's inboxes. for one thing, they target popular tags (ex. literally, the "palestine" or "gaza" tags, or any tag that may be trending at the time), or, they go for blogs who are consistently reblogging and/or uploading content related to the genocide. why? because they're taking advantage of the fact that you want to make a change in regards to what's going on. and if that's the case, what would stop you from donating to someone "in need," right?

if you want my honest opinion, if someone is sending you an ask about this on tumblr at all, it's likely not real. to put it into perspective: people who are really in gaza and want to escape, raise money, etc, will go to big network places such as gofundme, because there are better chances of them raising actual money in general, but in a short period of time. as opposed to asking people individually, their cause will be more widespread, and more people will see it. not only that: places like gofundme are pros at figuring out what's a scam and what's not. op in the above post noted this, and how places like gofundme will remove causes that are clearly scams. that's why scammers avoid places like this at all, and go to places like tumblr, where it isn't so easy for the actual site to remove their post. it's only when people on the app pick up on it, that scammers' facades fall. does that make sense?

i feel like this sort of jumped around, but i hope i was able to clarify what you were asking anyway. if someone feels the need to add onto this, please do, and if i need to clarify any point i made, etc, please let me know! ♡

[worldsfromhoney]

Greetings, plebeians

This is your resident unknown and attention-depraved author/writer, BEE/bee/beE/🐝

Here’s some stuff about moi:

I like… tea. YES I LIKE TEA 🍵🍵🍵 it’s quite honestly the greatest invention of all time

I also like reading. That’s kinda like a hobby that all writers are mandated to say. Which is reasonable.

I’m a fan of miniatures and piano. Yeah, I did try them out. Yeah, I did fail spectacularly, thank you! ☺️

I also like painting but the therapy one and not just a blank canvas that sucks the soul out of artists lol

What do I write?

I write… stuff. BEAUTIFUL, HEARTBREAKING STUFF, mind you. But it’s still stuff, so lemme elaborate.

Speculative fiction - if you idk this, it’s really just a mix of fantasy and sci-fi; the ‘what if’ genre

Urban fantasy - don’t get me wrong, I love high fantasy, but urban is waaay easier to worldbuild

Steampunk & other punks - PUUUUNK 🤘🤘🤘

Horror and thriller - mostly psychological and body horror, don’t worry! I don’t do jump scares or anything ☺️

Slice of life - mwah my heart and soul mwah

Others - yes, I am capable of doing other genres 😤 I’m a multi-faceted bee, you know?

DISCLAIMER: what I write might only reflect upon my psyche and state of mind but that is not a guarantee

My WiPs

I am proud to say that… I DO NOT HAVE ANY!!

*gasp* what ever do you mean bee? Are you quitting writing? *sobs*

No, my darlings.

i just have no big projects to boast about right now. I feel like big projects aint my thing at the moment and pushing myself only led me to disappear from the internet for a month 😞

What i do have are short works i randomly choose to write and post here on tumblr !!

✨ FICLET MASTERLIST IS HERE ✨

🐝 POETRY MASTERLIST IS HERE TOO 🐝

If you’re interested, please comment on this post or reblog or DM me if you want to be put in the taglist!!

Does that mean you accept… requests?

…………yes. Yes i do. Go and flood my askbox you plebs !

Am I anywhere else?

Please. It’s 2023. Of course I’m… everywhere *cue evil laugh*

Bluesky - if you haven’t heard it yet, tis the new Twitter… cuz it’s literally made by the old creators of that glorious blue bird *cue a moment of silence*

Tiktok or Twitter - do not look for me here

Tumblr - EYYYYYYYYYYY i post ALL my stuff here !! They’re really just bait to hook some writer friends 🥹

Ko-Fi - ehem ehem i know first drafts are considered shite but BUT i have decided to make them available for perusal yes you can burn your eyes to anyone who buys me a cup of tea ~

Patreon - i finally have one!! I’m still setting it up tho and prepping all the content 💛💛💛

I’ll be doing a patreon soon enough actually so look out for that

How I organise myself

Well i wish this is applicable to actual life because i’d very much like to know how 🫡

Jk, here be the tags:

#bee writes some stuff - my micros, my flash fics, my text posts

#bee plays some games - tag games !! which i have never played before till now !!

#bee does some prompts - this will definitely see the light of day… someday

#bee stalking some writers - what it says on the tin

#bee answers some asks - omg i only added this because someone actually sent me one *faints*

#bee saves some stuff - there are way too many resource posts that i’ve scrolled past cuz idk how to tag

[dollopheadsandclotpoles]

Been trying to highlight fanfiction with aspec elements on my sideblog @aroaceineveryplace because I think we need to see more of that in fics.

And while I've always had aspec-coded characters in my own fanfics (literally from even before I understood the terms and realised I myself was aroace), this year for ace week I thought I would do a bit of self-promotion and highlight some of the fics I've personally written over the years with explicitly aspec characters.

The Usurper - BBC Merlin (Gen fic about Merlin and Arthur's friendship, featuring an aromantic asexual Arthur) Arthur had long understood a truth about himself that no one else had. Namely, that he was not suited for marriage. He had been a lonely child to begin with, but he had discovered that love and passion, the romantic type that seemed to be the crux of ballads and poems, was not in his cards. He did not understand them. His father had pushed women in his way — noble ladies and princess alike — and Arthur had done his duty, taking them for walks in the palace gardens and giving up his time to indulge them in conversation, but it had never amounted to anything but gnawing anxiety in the pit of his stomach. In the past he had been driven to adoration by sorcery, but in his right mind it seemed as unfathomable as the science Gaius was always blathering about. Green-Eyed Monster - The Raven Cycle (T-rated fic, with Adam/Ronan romance, featuring a demiromantic demisexual Ronan) “I…,” Ronan inhaled sharply, then let his breath out through his teeth, like a smoker. “You know how Declan cheats, and I hate it? It’s not that… I’m morally against it. Like… cause of the church, or whatever. It’s… because I never understood how Declan could cheat. Like, it doesn’t make sense to me. Why would you want to be with someone you don’t know? How could you be with someone you don’t know?”  “Well… It’s sort of… biological, isn’t it?” Adam asked. “The attraction.”  Ronan was looking at his feet, bare on the marble floor. “Yeah… I never got that. That… attraction thing. It just seemed like… if you love someone, you’d only want them. That’s it.” He tugged at the bands on his wrist. “I’ve never looked at a stranger and… wanted them.”  To Sir, With Love - The Raven Cycle (T-rated fic with Adam/Ronan romance, featuring aromantic asexual Matthew) “Remember how I said…,” Matthew hesitated, then turned away from Adam. He took another moment before saying anything. “Remember how I said I don’t want to date girls?” Adam took a moment to compose himself. “You want… to date boys?” he asked, quietly.  That Adam could deal with. Adam had first hand experience with that. But Matthew turned back to him, his expression still raw. “No,” he said. “I don’t want to date anyone.” “That’s fine,” Adam said. “I thought it was fine,” Matthew said. “But all the boys in my class are obsessed with girls, you know? All they talk about all the time is how they want to kiss them and hold their hands, and do… other stuff. And they talk about which girls are pretty, and which girls are hot…,” Matthew ran a hand through his curls. “I don’t really get any of that. Like… I can see that some girls are pretty, but that’s it? What am I supposed to do if they’re pretty? They’re nice to look at… but like… I don’t see why my friends have to talk about it all the time.”

If you have fics with ace and aspec characters that you would like to share, please tag aroaceineveryplace and I'll reblog your post to it!

[onehundredgar]

Click for Palestine 🇵🇸 : https://arab.org/click-to-help/palestine/

Hey! What’s up? Thanks for coming around!

Pseudonym’s Annie. I’ve got most of my quick info in my bio, if you ever feel inclined to skim it! I’m Bangladeshi and Muslim. I’m also aspec, omnisexual, and pangender. I also am very large and contain multitudes.

This is my main blog! I reblog a lot of stuff I find funny, stuff about the moon, about animals and nature but birds and fish in particular, about community and partnership and overcoming prejudice, about love and family and friends, and about identity and orientation and mental health.

I tag all my posts, replies, and reblogs as accurately as I can. If there are any issues with my tags, post contents, or anything else in my blog, please let me know so I can fix it and make it a more comfortable online space!

I love meeting people! If you'd like to, shoot me a message or an ask and you can be sure I'll respond!

Below is the alphabetically organised guide to my current fandoms and my relationship with them, and to my organisational structure for my tags. It's a long post; keep reading at your own risk!

Fandoms!

Artemis Fowl

I can be safely critical of it nowadays since it's geared towards a younger audience but I respect the solid worldbuilding it portrays, especially for a children's book. Good stuff- I'd still recommend it.

Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared

Again, got into it when I was younger and it kind of burrowed its way into my brain where it rotted, forgotten, for ages until the sudden new season. Not necessarily emotionally invested, but the Three Of Them have my whole heart for sure.

Dungeon Meshi

I got into it VERY recently by binging the manga, and now I'm keeping up with the Netflix adaptation! Obsessed with the solid worldbuilding.

Gravity Falls

Top fandom ever everrrrr. Got obsessed with it as a kid and I’ve never let it go since. I know all the sordid fandom history, all the best and most popular headcanons of current day, and some the most based fanartists and fics. I do a lot of recreational multishipping in my dark and evil mind palace.

My Little Pony

Come on come onnnnn. It's a classic. I have an encyclopaedic and philosophical understanding of the MLP universe. No I will not talk about it.

Percy Jackson

Hey I mean it was pretty formative for me when I was younger. Got me into mythology! I'm critical of it nowadays but I cannot deny the positive impact it had on me. Good stuff! Haven't and probably won't watch the new live adaptation.

The Wind-Up Chronicle Bird

Read it VERY recently. Super surreal, and as always, Murakami never misses. However, the books I am emotionally invested in change on a monthly basis. Expect the title to switch in a little bit.

Welcome to Night Vale

I got into it half a year ago and it literally changed my brain chemistry. One of my forever fandoms for sure, though I must admit it fell off after "Father Kevin"...

Tag Organisation Guide!

Annie’s Anomalous Affairs:

#annie’s aberrant abominations - there’s very little content in this tag. OC tag; I don’t reaaaally talk about my OCs though so don’t worry about it. It’s mostly stuff I reblog to help character build anyway. I’ll list the subtags for individual OCs below as they appear on my blog.

#abomination: Danny #abomination: Hannah #abomination: Hedon #abomination: Lola #abomination: Nicky #abomination: Spring #abomination: Teresa

#annie adores advice - there’s a LOT of content in this tag. Advice or awareness spreading I reblog that I think will help me live easier, or to signal boost so people who need it can use it.

#annie argot - posts of mine where I think I utilised especially clever wordplay, which I archive under this tag for future writing reference.

#annie attempts art - my art! At least up until now I’ve drawn purely on Procreate so it’s all digital medium.

#annie awakened - a tag specifically for answering asks and mentions!

#annie awkwardly articulates - my posts! I talk about my thoughts and experiences, or I’ll be archiving a chat I had here online.

#authentic annie appearances - screenshots of text conversations with my IRL friends.

Annie Appreciates…:

#birdposting - just the same; reblogging cool and/or funny posts about birds! I love birds. Love their behaviour, love how they evolve, love eating them. I try to include the species of bird in the tags whenever I can!

#boys will be boys - I use this tag whenever I am appreciating masculinity! This includes folks being silly, being kind, being geeky, and all around being. Often accompanied by the “girl moment” tag (elaborated on below).

#classic - tag for infamous Tumblr posts that I archive for myself! Gotta collect those heritage posts, man. Can’t have a blog without the colour of the sky.

#classic + #to me - iconic Tumblr posts that feel like they should be infamous but aren’t for some reason.

#fishposting - you guessed it; reblogging cool and/or funny posts about fish! I love fish. Love their biology, love how they look, love eating them. I try to include the species of fish in the tags whenever I can!

#girl moment - I use this tag whenever I am appreciating femininity! This includes folks being silly, being kind, being geeky, and all around being. Often accompanied by the “boys will be boys” tag (elaborated on above).

#later gator - the tag I use to save things (usually videos) to look at later when I’m scrolling tumblr at double-time (or have my volume on), probably because I’m at work.

#my romantic wife - that’s the moon! I adore the moon, it’s unmatched (tag not to be confused with the term I often use, “my platonic wife”, elaborated on below)!

#number - tag for things that I think are attractive, ranging from blatant thirst trap art to standard-ATX motherboards.

#take me out to dinner first - tag for scheduled posts that have something to do with the date of the day.

Annie’s Associates:

#DNA double felix-cipher - tag for tumblr user @toytanks, Felix-Cipher. The tag is a play on the term “double helix structure”.

#my froinds :3 - I talk about or reblog posts that remind me of my IRL friends! My friends are very important to me and I love them so so much.

#sarufiyyun - tag for tumblr user @biblicallyaccuratepigeons, Seraph-Chim, who’s angelkin. Sarufiyyun is the Islamic term for Seraphim.

#the coworker - this very specific colleague I have who who is pretty eccentric. She stalks my blog. You can find her snarky remarks under the reclusive @annielover69420 handle.

#the spouse - this is “my platonic wife” (not to be confused with the tag “my romantic wife”, elaborated on above)! My best friend who I’ve known for nearly two decades. I have a special tag for her because I have a special relationship with her. Sometimes I will be a little sulky about her, but hey, marriage has its ups and downs!

Annie’s Avocations:

#art reference - what it says on the tin. Step by step guides or simple diagrams of art tips; whatever helps me draw!

#recipes - I feel like I should throw this tag in here now that I have at least two or three reblogs for it. Cool recipes for cool food I’d like to make one day.

#tutorial - tutorials for anything at all! I eat life advice for every meal. Sometimes these won't be strictly tutorials but something adjacent— I tag as such anyway so I can find it later under that label if necessary.

#writing - yes, I have nothing to show for it on here, but I’m a writer! Tag for writing tips and also inspiration.

That's all, folks! Have a good one!

[cozza-frenzy]

Fanfic: A Perfect Moment

Of all the places I could be, I just want to be here with you. Hello again, fandom! It’s been less than a week (apparently??) and @chronicsheepdrawing‘s amazing character designs are still keeping my creativity train rolling! This fic once again stars their Drinky Bird Narrator - so if you’re not familiar, go check out a silly bird! (He certainly needs more love, given how he thinks of himself... ) This is a sequel (of sorts) to Anything Not Saved. It happens some time afterwards, after more resets and endings have taken place. Expect a dark chocolate Angst Cake with plenty of Mutual Pining, layers of Fluffy Stannarrator between each layer, and a Meta cherry on top - trust me, you’ll see what I mean. And my apologies to any ASL users; I did at least try to do some research, but I can’t vouch for my accuracy! CONTENT WARNINGS: Isolation, Paranoia, Abandonment Issues, Self-Hatred, Body Dysphoria (Not Gender Related), Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, Emotional Breakdown, Memory Loss, Panic Attack, Touch Aversion, Autistic Sensory Overload/Over-Stimulation. I’m also adding a mild Unreality Warning to this one. If you’re looking at a reblog of this post, there are details in the tags of the original if you feel like you may be triggered by this. For everyone else, the tags are a minor spoiler, so maybe don’t look unless you’re really curious. Bon Appetit!

Stanley? STANLEY!? Oh my god, Stanley! Stanley, thank goodness - something VERY peculiar is going on this morning… See, it all started when I booted up my computer this morning - and you’ll never believe it, but I wasn’t receiving any commands! NONE! So I asked one of the other Employees what was going on, and they must not have known, because they didn’t say anything! What do you think; should I perhaps try the meeting room? Do you think maybe I missed a memo? I mean I really don’t want to interrupt anything, not to mention the sheer embarrassment of walking into something like that, not only unannounced but LATE- Wait, I’m not done! Stanley, I’m not - oh, sorry, sorry, of course! It’s precisely 10:32 AM, of course  you always get a drink of water from the cooler at this time in the morning… haha, typical silly old ▇▇▇▇▇▇, am I right? I swear, I’d lose my head if it wasn't permanently attached to my neck! But, ah, anyway, Stanley, I just feel like… like something’s wrong? I mean, have you noticed how some things are, eh, just… you know… ‘off’? Like did you know Employee [ERROR: DATABASE ENTRY INVALID]’s desk is empty? I mean, it looks like they haven’t touched their pencil sharpener in weeks! In fact, now that… now that I’ve thought about it… Stanley, did we ever HAVE an Employee [ERROR: DATABASE ENTRY INVALID]? I mean surely we wouldn’t have a desk without an employee! That’s ridiculous! But why can’t I seem to… ? Ah, yes, alright, I know work is important and I know  I tend to ramble but- please, just hear me out?? Look, I know I must be trying your patience! I know my ‘little stories’ are utterly insufferable to literally EVERY other employee in this building! But you, you always stopped to listen and - waitwaitwait, I’m sorry, just - please! Please Stanley, I’m ALWAYS supposed to receive my instructions and now I can’t even access my bloody terminal! I mean, how ELSE am I supposed to make sure the other employees are doing their jobs correctly?? Didn’t the board hand down that notice just last week!? You know, the one reiterating how vital it is to the well-being of the company that all of us, together- Stanley? Stanley, where are you going-? Can… can you hear me? Can you even SEE me!? Wait! Stanley! Stanley, I’m right here! I’m right HERE! Why aren’t you looking at me? Why aren’t you LOOKING at me!? STANLEY! STANLEY, PLEASE!! DON’T LEAVE M- Oh… …Oh no… —------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ah, memories… Wonderful, wonderful memories. So much exquisitely-crafted content to reminisce over. He’d worked so hard on crafting this place; he’d fashioned every detail with care and precision. Yes, there would be trees here, a nice little fence there… oh, perhaps a few flowers, for a little splash of color! Yes, yes! The sound of birds, the smell of grass, the sky just a little overcast... yes indeed, not too bright, nor too gloomy. The light would hit just perfect this way, painting everything in soft and muted shades. Wonderful. Those clouds would be the whipped cream on this lovely little slice of the world, so close to being served and savored. And like a nervous, fidgeting pastry chef, the anticipation of someone experiencing this delectable delicacy had him practically giddy! The Narrator took a deep breath through the nose he maybe didn’t have, filling absent lungs with fresh air; and heaved a heavy sigh as he closed his plastic eyes, calming himself down. Wouldn’t be long now, he thought, chuckling softly. Stanley had fallen for his little breadcrumb trail the very minute he’d opened that vent… and any minute now, he’d be marveling at the inexplicably out of place stone archway. Manifested as if in a dream, a glowing portal to another realm, right there in the office… He rocked back on his heels a little, humming merrily to himself as he waited. Ah, he was proud of that little room; so mysterious, so enticing. A beautiful fragment of memory that he’d dusted off and polished up, until it glittered in his mind’s eye like a priceless diamond. Not half bad for something he’d forcibly yanked from the tangled, mangled wreckage that had been left behind in his head, when he’d stopped being human and become something- The Narrator cleared his nonexistent throat, straightening his tie. No, no, not today, he scolded himself internally. That so-called ‘Ultra Deluxe’ content’ had been so unfathomably disappointing, he’d had no choice but to do better! To show them just how great The Stanley Parable used to be! And any minute now, the hero of their story would be walking through that door to the most wonderful surprise. “Just our little secret”, The Narrator said as he felt Stanley’s presence. He was right behind him now, and getting closer. “Take a look.” He turned around, eager to see his protagonist’s reaction. He watched as Stanley shielded his eyes; the fingertips on his other hand tracing the surface of the cool stone pillar, as he stepped out into the memory of warm daylight. And the Narrator’s heart swelled with pride as he heard the soft gasp of wonder - the exact reaction he’d been looking for. “I call it - the Memory Zone!” He said, turning towards the path before him. “It’s where I keep all of my favorite memories… ” Not too far away was a squat, triangular building, full of snippets he’d painstakingly selected and organized for display. He’d come here a few times himself while it was still under construction; just to re-live some of the moments he’d preserved. As soon as Stanley stepped through that door, he would… wait… The Narrator froze suddenly, glancing over his shoulder. He’s got that look again. He’s… looking at me! Damn it, he’d been so caught up in what he was doing, he’d forgotten to unload his model! Alright, alright, maybe if he acted quickly enough, Stanley would dismiss it as simply a brief glitch- >/console >/unload Narrator.mdl ERROR: NOT FOUND What?? Clenching his glove-fist in frustration, he reached into the code and tried again. >/unload Narrator.mdl ERROR: NOT FOUND >/locate Narrator.mdl ERROR: POSITION NOT VALID The Narrator closed the console. That warm, fuzzy feeling of pride was quickly disintegrating under the freezing grasp of fear. He’d built the Memory Zone in a place so well hidden it was only outside the bloody map!!! And now there were footsteps behind him! And like the absolute fool he was, he turned around! Stanley was approaching. Slowly drawing closer. Each step ticking away the seconds to his doom. It’s okay, he reassured himself. You can pass it off as the Easter Egg from last time - just using it as a puppet to welcome him and nothing more! His face flushed. Stanley was right in front of him. He tried not to think about what muscles he may or may not still have - but regardless of their supposed existence, they all tensed at once, leaving him stiff as a board, frozen in terror. But he could work with this, right? Yes, he could! He could work with this! He could improvise, he improvised all the time-! Just don’t move…. Stanley looked into The Narrator’s eyes, his hands held tightly to his chest. …And he’ll lose interest eventually… Stanley moved his hand. It trembled as he held it out in front of him, slowly reaching forwards. Stanley… ? Stanley bit his lip. Wait, Stanley, what are you doing-? And Stanley touched him. The boggled look on the Narrator’s face shattered any previously-held records in the history of boggling. Stanley was touching him. Stanley’s hand was touching him. Stanley’s… warm, gentle hand... the pads of his fingertips slightly rough, slightly calloused. Each one a scar from another life; from the only life he’d known before The Parable. Continuously, rhythmically pressing buttons, over and over. Day in, day out. Broken fragments of memory flashed before the Narrator’s eyes in a sudden flood of noise; a disjointed, jumbled mess, utterly out of context and out of order. The taste of coffee in a paper cup. Stanley’s eyes. The bubble of the water cooler.  Conversation. Buttons marked “YES” and “NO”. His hands, his human hands, nails painted in an office-appropriate shade. A phone ringing. Stanley’s smile. A rising sense of panic. A snippet of a half-finished anecdote. Waking up. Blacking out. Laughter. Fire and pain and then nothing. A lunch break. An office-mandated birthday cake. A board meeting. An office-wide memo. Stanley’s hands. Stanley’s hands. He felt the tears welling up. He wrestled with the memories that hardly made sense, momentarily gaining the upper hand, only to find himself smacked senseless by the feeling of overwhelming grief that spiraled out of the current moment and skewered his heart. He twisted his head this way and that - desperately trying to get his stupid, stupid body to move! This was wrong! This was all wrong! “STOP!!!” The Narrator screamed, finally managing to pull away Stanley recoiled as if he’d been burned, and the Narrator turned from him, clutching the sides of his head as he struggled to get a grip, struggled to cram all of those horrible, horrible feelings back down inside himself where they belonged. NO NO NO NO NO NO-! The illusion is ruined! He definitely knows it’s me now! But ahead of him lay his last hope. His last chance at salvaging something, anything, from this horrendous mistake he’d made. The display area! If I can just get to it then I won’t have to face him! he thought to himself. He’d have to be quick, he’d have to take advantage of Stanley being distracted, but he could do this. He could make it! He could… he could just figure out the rest later, he had to GO! The Narrator started to run; and realized his fatal mistake too late. Inside his inhuman, transparent stomach, a sizable amount of liquid sloshed noisily back and forth. The more he ran, the more it sloshed. Back and forth, back and forth. Slish, slosh, slish, slosh… the momentum of each wave slowly building... and building... until-! “AH!!” One of his feet caught on an uneven memory of grass. All that heavy liquid, all that momentum, SLOSHED all the way to his front. And as these things tend to work with the laws of physics, the weight sent him tumbling forward onto his stupid idiot face, sliding across the ground a few feet before he finally came to a stop. The Narrator rocked gently back and forth from the still-sloshing liquid in the transparent globe of his belly, knowing exactly how he looked. It was a sight that would leave a professional circus clown weeping; hanging up his red nose and floppy shoes for the last time, his worldview in ruins. Witnessing such a sight, he’d know, deep in his heart, that no carefully coordinated pratfall or precisely timed nose honk - not a single artfully-placed whoopee cushion or expertly thrown custard pie - could ever come close to such breathtaking buffoonery. This is it. Stanley is never going to take me seriously ever again. The tears came thick and fast now, leaving the despairing Narrator gasping for breath between sobs. He’ll laugh at me. He’ll mock any sort of narrative I’ll try and create. Anything I try, no matter how wonderful, no matter how meaningful, it’ll be just a big joke. Like ME. Stanley stood over the Narrator, casting a shadow over him as he lay on the floor. The Narrator glanced over his shoulder, his fingers digging into the memories of grass and dirt beneath them and ripping them apart. Suddenly, hopelessness had given way to white-hot fury; Go on, he silently, bitterly urged his protagonist. Do it, you cretin. Finish me off. Put me out of my misery. Break my story! Break my heart! Break ME! Burn it all down, grind it all into the dirt where it belongs-! Stanley held out his hand. The Narrator looked up at him, tears still rolling down his cheeks. He was - for perhaps the first time in his life - speechless. —------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Meanwhile; a man named Stanley had overstepped, and he knew it. <It’s you.> He’d signed, mere moments ago. <It’s really you… > Oh of course that shrill, annoying little voice in his head known as Common Sense had screamed at him endlessly. It stomped its little feet, tore out its hair, hammered its little fists on the bars of the bespoke and utterly inescapable cage that situations like this always built to contain it. No, stop! It cried. You mustn’t! But Stanley’s hand had moved of its own accord. He just had to know. He had to know if what he was seeing in front of him was really, really real. He had to know if what seemed like a memory of a dream of a memory - of someone he’d once felt close to - actually meant something. And then he’d touched The Narrator. Stanley’s hand shook when it had first met that plastic cheek; but feeling the smooth surface, he couldn’t help but relax from its reassuring familiarity. It was almost like a button, if a button was surprisingly warm. And despite feeling almost exactly like plastic, there was something indescribable, something wonderfully and beautifully alive about it. This was plastic with a pulse, and it made his fingertips tingle... His gently questing fingers found hair next. If he’d been one for poetry, he might have compared its color to fresh-fallen snow, kissed by the morning sun, but such metaphors escaped a mind such as his. Stanley was a simple man; not stupid, at least not usually, but his world had been small before the Parable swallowed him up. His memories of his old life were limited mostly to what he’d done at the office. But he vaguely remembered seeing a color like that, at work, in some kind of context… by the water cooler, during some kind of talk… and he knew he’d wondered, more than once, if it was as soft and fluffy as it looked. And as he stroked it gently... yes, apparently, it was that soft. A little stiffer than he’d imagined, maybe, but at least it looked nice and fluffy. Stanley felt a blush spreading across his cheeks. He hadn’t been sure what to think at first, but one word was slowly coming to mind, and that word was- “STOP!!!” Suddenly, abruptly, Stanley half-remembered and half-realized that softness was attached to The Narrator, and the shock may as well have electrified his arm. He pulled away; and seeing The Narrator’s reaction, his poor, simple heart sunk all the way to his feet. He knew he’d pushed things too far, he knew he’d done something dangerously close to Workplace Inappropriate Physical Contact, but had he hurt him-?? The Narrator turned and tried to run. Stanley scrambled after him, longing to cry out; Wait, please! I’m sorry! Don’t despawn again! The Narrator tripped and fell. Stanley, overcome with worry, rushed to his side, extending his hand. The Narrator just… looked at him. He was breathing heavily, his eyes full of tears, his fingers covered in dirt and crushed bits of grass. <I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!> Stanley signed repeatedly; in his desperation, he couldn’t even remember the next part of the Workplace Apology Procedure. The Narrator was still silent; and Stanley’s heart sunk further and further as his frustration grew and grew. Half-formed signs spilled from his shaking hands as his own tears began to rally the troops, fat drops ready to march down his cheeks in double time as he bit his tongue - why was this so hard, why was this so hard?? Mustering every bit of bravery an office worker of his rank possibly could, Stanley fell back on his last resort. Extending his hand again, he crossed the fingers on his other hand, holding them up so The Narrator could see them clearly; <R> Next, he held two fingers up; <U> His fingers formed a circle; <O> And lastly, two fingers split, like a peace sign; <K> “Am I… okay??” The Narrator’s words were strangled with emotion; but just hearing him say something, say anything, was enough for a wave of relief to wash over our daring hero. Smiling, Stanley beckoned with his extended hand, and The Narrator finally grasped it. It was soft, like the tasteful suede they used for the chairs in the Boss’ Office, and Stanley found himself subconsciously running his thumb over a line of neat stitches as he helped the poor man off the ground. The Narrator teetered on his feet for a moment, seeming unsteady. Stanley tilted his head slightly; what was that strange sloshing noise… ? But The Narrator sniffled, bowing his head again, and Stanley immediately snapped to attention. Yes, he knew just what to do! Reaching into his shirt pocket, he pulled out a packet of Office-Issued Disposable Handkerchiefs - an employee’s best friend for any sneeze, sniffle, or non-fatal accident involving coffee - and handed one to The Narrator. “Oh, Stanley… ” The Narrator dabbed at his eyes, and blew his nose like a foghorn. Stanley looked at him with a mixture of sympathy and utterly helpless confusion. He could only ever recall hearing him so utterly distraught once before, and that was… not a memory he really wanted to dig into. Was this really his fault? Had he deviated too much? Had he ruined his story again… ? “I don’t understand… I just don’t understand… ” sobbed the Narrator; ��Why are you being so nice to me?” Stanley was utterly dumbfounded. He couldn’t even bring himself to start signing, but the What!? was so implicit that The Narrator looked up in surprise <BECAUSE! I’M! HAPPY! TO SEE YOU!> Stanley signed with undeniable emphasis, holding his hands right at the Narrator’s eye level. Unable to hold back his own tears for a fraction of a second longer, the armies came marching forth in torrents. Stanley was happy. Stanley was angry. Stanley was frustrated, overwhelmed, overstimulated, and so desperate he felt like he was drowning. His lip quivered, his whole body shaking from the effort, but he had to do this, he had to be brave. This was what he’d waited for. This was his hope. Somewhere, far far back in his memories, something stirred. Before the Parable. Before beginnings and endings. Before he’d ever known what a ‘Reset’ was, those memories were reaching out to him. Memories of a face half-remembered, and a name long forgotten. Memories of someone speaking his name, over and over, instead of addressing him simply as ‘427’. A kindly smile. Uproarious, mischievous laughter. Coffee with cream and a disproportionate amount of sugar. Passing a slice of store-bought birthday cake, and accidentally brushing hands under the paper plate. <STAY!> And stories. Every day, there were stories. The other employees called it rambling, called it irritating, called it inefficient and unproductive… but to him, they were little stories… <HERE!!> Stanley strained from the effort. <PLEASE!!!> And The Narrator touched him back. Stanley froze in place. He was hyperventilating, gasping for every breath between silent sobs, but his hands finally lay still. The Narrator’s hands were holding them; silencing them. But Stanley didn’t mind; in fact, he welcomed it. He was at his breaking point. His heart and his head were both full to bursting. So many feelings. So many words. This wasn’t what he was good at. This wasn’t what he was meant for. But now, standing right across from him, was someone who was. Standing there, gently holding Stanley’s hands, was me. His Narrator. Let’s shift the perspective again, shall we? —------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ahhh, there! That’s much better… feels like having a really good stretch after you’ve been sitting in the same place for a while, don’t you think? Let’s just take a moment to let the story settle… to take a deep breath, maybe have a sip of water…. to appreciate just how far we’ve come. …Now, uh, where was I… ? Oh, yes! Anyway; slowly but surely, I found my footing again. Our heads had been in the clouds long enough, and now I was pulling us both back to Earth, back into whatever passed for reality in this place. My thumbs gently stroked the back of Stanley’s hands; giving him something real to cling to. Giving my nervous hands something to do with themselves. And the moment I saw the tension leave his shoulders, I let go of the breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding. <You’re really here… > Stanley looked down at my hands and their irremovable gloves. Despite my fears, there was no rejection, no cruel mockery; just quiet fascination. Again, that same look, as his eyes moved up from there to my chest and to my face. And needless to say, it didn’t take an omniscient narrator to understand what his eyes were asking me. “Yes, Stanley. Go ahead.” Stanley reached out; I leaned my head into his hand this time, letting him know me through touch. And don’t you dare pass judgment - this is very hard for me to admit to - but it took everything I had not to burst into soppy tears all over again. We were old friends who’d just met. Two halves of the same soul, reunited at last. Surely a meeting like this was written on all the stars in the infinite cosmos, and upon every grain of sand in the- Stanley reached out a finger and ‘booped’ my nose. He laughed uproariously; not at me, but with me, as I somehow found a small chuckle growing into a full-on belly laugh. I just couldn’t help myself! This entire, bizarre situation we’d once again found ourselves in… the two of us so helpless, messy, and stupid... it felt so good to come so utterly undone. We were just a couple of total idiots, Stanley and I. Standing there and giggling like lunatics. And then… I found myself overcome by a strange impulse of my own. Seized by a brief moment of temporary insanity, perhaps. Taking a small step back, I opened my arms. Stanley didn’t hesitate for a single second. He fell into them like he was coming home; like he’d just had the longest work day in the universe, and someone had just presented him with the fluffiest feather bed in existence. Nearly bloody bowled me over again, with all his enthusiasm. But I looked down at Stanley - and he looked so happy, well... uh... you know what? I’ll give you the incomparable joy of picturing in your head just how happy he was. What?? No, I’m not lost for words! Me? Lost for words? Ugh, of all the… no, no, let’s not ruin this. This one right here is all yours. No, go ahead, take it. Don’t say I never do anything for you. But, ahem - to continue our scene, we were both sitting down now, right there on the ground. Stanley had his ear to my stomach, listening to whatever the hell liquid is in there slosh back and forth, as he rocked himself gently in place. There was no way he could realize how he was reminding me, with each slosh, of what I am. Of how I’ve changed. Of what I’ve lost. But for the first time since I could remember… I didn’t hate it. At least, not entirely. Perhaps I could get used to that, in enough time. Around us, the memory of birds sang, and the memory of a breeze gently rustled the memories of grass and flowers. Somewhere in the distance, a memory of a piano was playing itself - ah yes, I’d almost forgotten about that. Perhaps we’d see it later. Perhaps we’d sit on the bench I’d placed nearby, and look at the view. Perhaps talk to one another, instead of just at one another. Yes… that would be nice, wouldn’t it… But between Stanley and I; right here, and right now? There’s a glittering silence between us; one that outshines any other memory I’d care to rescue from the scrap heap. Things, I realize, are falling into place. As gentle as snow, as warm and welcome as the light of dawn. This, I can tell, is what I’ve been waiting for all this time; what I’ve been striving for, over and over, with each and every branching path. A perfect moment.

[kyberblade]

Somehow we’re here, and I need to take a look around….

Well, guys, as Back To You draws closer to an end, (don’t worry, there’s still the sequels, it’s far from over - and we still have mayyyyybe 5 or so chapters left….) I’m starting to get a bit sad and nostalgic.

This has been such a journey. And while it isn’t goodbye goodbye, it’s still an end to a part of it, and it makes me sad. 😩

Looking back, I realized, this journey has been filled with people, more than anything else, and I wanted to take a moment to touch on that.

I know I’m going to forget people, and if I do, I am so sorry. Know that I DO remember you, I am just really horrible with names, truly.

These are just some of the amazing people I’ve met along the way on this journey, and I don’t know what I would do without you.

*deep breath, here we go….*

@grippingbeskar - I really blame you for all of this nonsense. You got me into this mess. And I love you for it. ❤️

@fordo-kixed-rex - You’ve helped me in so many ways, and we talk every. Day. I don’t know what I would do without you, friend. 🩵

@littlemisspascal - You’ve been so kind to me every step of the way, and your tags have always made me smile! Your lists are a blessing to this fandom and you are a gift to everyone. Thank you for all you do, and for being you. 💗

@what-the-heckin-heck - I love screaming with you. I love brainstorming with you. There are so many things I love doing with you, I can’t even list them all here. 💜

@dontletyourchildrenwatchthis - You are responsible for brilliance such as, “You snore like a kriffing bantha.” And I have laughed so so so hard every time you come up with these gems. You get me. ✨ 💛

@lloweryourstandardss - We’ve only talked a few times really, and I know it isn’t much, but we’ve brainstormed, and you’ve gotten back into writing some yourself, and I’m so excited to see what you’ve got! You make me laugh so hard! 💖

@multifandomsw - You encouraged me at the very beginning to “just post it”, and I’ve never looked back. Thank you, friend. I hear your voice each time I post a new chapter, and I smile. 💕

@aesnawan - You brought these characters to life for me, and I can never thank you enough. What you’ve created is truly beautiful and I love love love to stare at it. It’s not enough, but thank you, from the bottom of my heart. 🧡

Some people I’ve talked to a few times but I’m horrible at maintaining a convo sometimes but know that I value what you have to say and you’ve made me smile like a fool many times over - @eeopxlt @yourcoolauntie @lam-ila @i-own-loki @kurlyfrasier @silver-pieces @heyitsaloy @professionalfangrrl @hoodedbirdie @nghtwngs @queenmalhinewahine @come-hell-or-eldren-fire @qweenrogerina @pxl8ed @jxvipike @itzagothamcitysiren @cheoriemoawa @dilfsaremyfavourite @thereaperisabitch @djarintreble @dilf-din @sexysquatch 🩷

If we’ve talked and I forgot you - I’M SO SORRY!!! Even if we never talked and you just commented on something of mine, or simply liked or reblogged, know you made me smile so big, and I remember the feeling, if not your name. I literally can be the worst with names, but know I think of all my past convos and smile. I know I keep saying that but AHHHHHHH! It’s true. I value each and every one of you, and am beyond honored you’ve chosen to go on this journey with me. Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you. ❤️‍🔥💞

[idyllic-affections]

Greetings!

Hi, it is I, the person who you (now formerly) know as 🐉Anon! Was quite subtle with my anon moniker wasn't I? Eheh...

 Anyhow, Yeah, so this is me. You may have seen me among the people liking your posts! 

If you wanna, feel free to check out my blog. You… won't see much, save for some reblogs and my atrocious tagging on one of them LOL. I've got plans to post stuff there eventually, just not really sure what I wanna cook up, and the motivation for it also has its way of popping up at inconvenient times (example: I have a part-time job, and motivation tends to pop up then 💀). Okay, that first bit was kind of a lie, I know the kinds of things I wanna post about (those things being mainly OC-related stuff, as well as some fanfiction if I’m able to get myself to actually write my ideas out), I’m just having trouble figuring out where to start. I was thinking I should probably make a sorta “introduction post” before anything else, but I’m still figuring that out, among other things with this whole blog thing. I’m honestly pretty new to this sorta thing, hehe…

But that’s beginning to get off-topic! So anyway, yeah! Happy to join the moot crew, I look forwards to seeings the things you’ve got in planning, and maybe sharing!

As a sorta special something for you, the other moots, and the remaining emoji anons (if they wanna) to participate in, allow me to pose a little query for the community.

What is a fandom that you enjoy very much, but don’t really write for, or simply don’t talk much about for whatever reason?

For me, I’d have to look to my current hyper-fixation (as well as just in general being a childhood fav of mine), Transformers! Where I start with this one? It's kind of hard for me to put into words just how deeply this one in particular has touched me. I've It’s just such a truly incredible franchise with that is packed to the brim with many lovable (and extremely hateable), vibrant characters, and phenomenal stories across the numerous continuities crafted by countless very skilled writers tackling deep and often dark themes, and it honestly just has such a special place in my heart. And hey, the basis of a setting following the struggles of two faction of a race of shapeshifting alien robots and literal eon spanning war does have a certain flair to it, no?

But I’ve rambled on long enough now, haven’t I?

Until next time!

i meant to answer this sooner BUT!!!!!! i am here now!!!! YOU. YOU WERE ONE OF THE "blorbo from my notes" PEOPLE, SOMEONE WHO WAS ALWAYS LIKING MY POSTS HAHA don't worry. you were not the only non-subtle emoji anon LMAO

that is so real and valid, motivation just does pop up at the worst of times. it's happened to me in the middle of standardized tests and other timed events before. it is both a blessing and a curse! introduction posts are a pretty good place to start, i think. but take your time fr it can be hard to figure out where and when to begin!!!

ohh for me, it might very well be voltron: legendary defender, or something of the like! i have a lot of fandoms i just Don't talk about, and there's really no reason why--i just don't. or it never comes up in conversation HAHA i also like gravity falls and good omens, things of that nature. i don't have the attention span to finish supernatural but i was into it for a while! but honestly that is so real, i have similar feelings about vld. i should rewatch it. it was a fundamental, formative experience for me in middle school. this shit is why i'm into hsr /hj........ but it is very dear to me!!!! there is a special place in my heart for the paladins <3

[ideal-girl]

I didn’t include this as part on that original submission because it’s a really shallow reason; especially for a serious topic, but a partial reason I have problems with your recent posts and rebloggings about the Israelis people (the people, not the government); or more accurately, the TONS and SERIES of posts about it, is because, well, I’ve sent like multiple submissions that I’ve been waiting for like weeks or so. Submissions that you promised you would write a response to in like a Wednesday, or “this Friday”, and then days or weeks go by and you never did them. To the point that I suggested you write rough drafts first. So the fact that these submissions still haven’t been responded to yet meanwhile you’re posting or reblogging a recurring series of uncomfortably negative and rather malice-filled (or insensitive) content (you literally made a post saying “Death to all of them”) makes it feel like you’re intentionally ignoring them (even if I don’t think or believe that’s the case). I guess you’re venting or whatever, but it feels like an overload… (there’s more to it but it’s political reasons and you said you didn’t want to touch the subject anymore) It wouldn’t be so bad if, again, you didn’t write outright statements saying that your responses can be done on said specific days… and then it doesn’t show up (like those gifs or the mega post for example). I’m trying to be patient, but with what you were doing recently it’s wearing thin.

Nia: 

I'm not reblogging or reposting anything to antagonize or spite you. 

I just reblog and repost things that are relevant to my blog's primary purpose ("aesthetics"), but I also reblog and repost things that are out of my blog's scope, like Palestine vs Israel, because it's hard to ignore an active war and/or genocide. 

I understand that I have disappointed you in giving false updates about your submissions, but I cannot always control exactly how my life is going to be on a given day.

You can control the publication and presentation of your work by posting it on your own blog.

I'm not being dismissive of you; I genuinely believe that all artists, designers, writers, or general "content creators", even as hobbyists, should be in control of their work by having their own space that cannot be encumbered by other people's unreliableness, spitefulness, etc. Tumblr is a great place for that, but I tend to like Substack even better. 

It's easier for me to reblog or repost something than it is to give my thoughtful opinion, even in bullet points. I still have to put cognitive effort into reading and interpreting stories, and it may take me awhile to formulate thoughts in my brain that I want to express on paper and on my blog. I'm willing to just publish and tag your submissions without my commentary because that's so much easier, but you do have the expectation that I give a response more complex than "it's gud!" I cannot always do that, even if I want to. 

That's just how it is! 

You need to understand that @ideal-girl, and it's many iterations, belongs to me. Your work, although I post and comment on it, belongs to you. You have the right and the obligation to protect and control it, not me. I do not recommend that anyone rely on someone else's space for anything when it comes to their work, and they should not expect someone else to labor for their work either.

If you want GIFs, you should create them yourself. 

If you want a particular story, you should write it yourself. You have the skill for that. I don't even know why this is even be spoken about! When you realized that I didn't have the time or interest to write particular stories or commentaries, then you should have done it yourself. This includes questions you had about Sam's Ex, which I'm using as an example of labor that should have been done by you, but that was done by me. I didn't mind interpreting and characterizing him, but he was your character. You knew him better than me and you should have been the one to understand his mindset and motives. You should have been telling me about him, not the other way around. 

I will be very clear: I liked giving commentary on your stories and I liked answering your questions about your characters when I could. You just have to understand that many of the tasks you asked me to complete are for the author, not the audience. You would understand that if you had your own blog or "space" that requires you to sustain your own authorship. I cannot do that for you here; this is @ideal-girl, nowhere else. 

We do not need to have a "falling out" to part ways. You can make the mature decision to not interact with me. I thought you had already done that after you wrote that rant accusing me of exploiting the Palestine just to spite (Israeli) Jews and to incite ethnic and/or racial violence towards them. You made that accusation, along with some other ones in that same vein, because you didn't see me post fundraisers in support of Palestine and because I provided evidence that racist people do weaponize identity politics and historical trauma to justify being racist. 

I do post things that are purely about the Palestine, with little to no relation to Israel and/or Jews. You will have to go into my archive and scroll through my blog to find those things. I also reblog fundraisers. I also reblog articles that implicate Israel and its complicit citizens, which includes racist people and pedophiles who I have the right to dislike and even wish death on, if they're gonna wish death on children and masturbate to their suffering. 

I will not go back and forth with you about this subject. 

I read that it was racist to challenge racism in particular communities, which I disagree with. I also read that no one in particular communities weaponizes identity politics and historical trauma, which I disagree with. I gave evidence of racism in particular communities and how they weaponize identity politics and historical trauma. My case-in-point was zionistbiker2024, who is Jewish, who is racist, and who exploits his identity and historical trauma to spread disinformation that people are forced to accept if they don't want to be branded Anti-Semitic.

I used him as my case-in-point because the "particular community" in question was Jewish. If the argument was that it's racist to challenge Black people's racism and that Black people never weaponize identity politics or historical trauma, I would have posted jumeisex instead because she does that. It just wasn't the case and so I didn't need to post her. 

FYI: I considered posting jumeisex anyways to "prove" that I confront and challenge all bigots, not just Jews. However, pandering and virtue-signaling is for the weak. It's up to you to understand context and circumstances and to stop attributing malicious intent to someone just because you don't like or understand how they live their life. You accused me of exploiting the Palestine out of spite for Jews because I don't even post fundraisers. I actually did, without intention, discover and reblog fundraisers. These are the posts you consider antagonistic and spiteful towards you, but that's what you wanted from my blog. I gave it to you, not even thinking about you, and you are still upset. 

There's something within you that you need to handle on your own. 

You have to figure out why you feel entitled to my blog, why you attribute malicious intent to my posts without even engaging with them, and why you have certain values (restorative justice, good publicity, "individualism", etc) that you only reserve for certain people but that should apply to everyone.

You said that your patience is wearing thin; my patience is beyond that. I can't keep reassuring you that I don't hate Jews because your belief in my Anti-Semitism is disingenuous anyways. If you read my personal posts in good faith, you would have been able to understand my intentions and my beliefs. You would have understood that they were not rooted in bigotry, but in facts that undermine some of the racist beliefs that are held within some people about the ancestral land being killed for.  

The Palestine, before it was even called the Palestine, was already full of life before the Twelve Tribes decided to join forces and create the Kingdom of Israel. Therefore, Jews have always shared their ancestral land with other communities, and so they are not any more entitled to it than them. This is something you don't agree with but you can't prove me wrong, and so you decided to label me a bigot and end there. There are plenty of other things you dislike about me but that you can't make reasonable criticisms over, and so you criticize my character as if that's meaningful to me. 

We do not need to have a "falling out" to part ways.

That's why I didn't respond to your submission that vilified me for my beliefs and behaviors that are not vicious or bigoted at all. I skimmed through the other one, because what's the point of responding?

I'm not going to waste my time continuing to explain why I post things, why I believe things, why I wish death on necrophiliac pedophiles, even if they are Jewish and/or Israeli, the implications of accusing people of being racist for being anti-racist, what people mean when they wish death on a country (which means death to an oppressive empire and its enablers, which often includes citizens), how decolonialism is inherently violent but not inherently bigoted, and everything else. You're not going to engage with what I say in good faith merely because you don't want to.

You have the right to dislike me, just like you have the right and the obligation and to protect and control your work. You don't have a right to my blog or the right to insult me or defame me because you don't like my opinions or my neglect of your submissions. This isn't a serious thing for me because this is my domain, but you should reconsider the way you treat people when you are disappointed in them.

I was very kind to you in letting you post on my blog when I was more active, and I was very kind to you in explaining over and over again what my beliefs are and why I behave in a particular way to make you understand that I wasn't being Anti-Semitic, I wasn't exploiting the Palestine, or trying to find an excuse to discredit and defame Israel (zionistbiker2024, jumeisex, etc, just appeared on the apps I was using). You still continued to attribute intentional malice and bigotry to my actions, but never gave any clear, definitive examples of that. You just assumed things or sympathized with necrophilic pedophiles (who I wished death on) because of identity politics. That's okay. You life your life. 

We don't need to have a "falling out". We don't have to disrespect or defame each other. We don't need to have a prolonged discussion about anything. 

@ideal-girl, which is my blog, is no longer the best place for your work. I recommend that you get your own space so that you can protect and control your portfolio, and not be reliant on inconsistent, spiteful, or bigoted people like me (allegedly) to maintain and post it. I also recommend that you go into my archive, find your submissions, and make a copy of them so that you can always have them, even if my blog gets terminated or something. This is only if you need to do that and this is just my suggestion. You life your life. 

I will post everything of yours that's in my inbox before I post this response, and then we can be done. We don't have to become enemies just because my blog doesn't pander to you anymore. We can just...stop. 

[kedreeva]

I’ve been on tumblr since 2012 and following you pretty much that entire time and have never reblogged or posted a single thing under my name. Before that I was on LJ for years and never posted anything. I send (nice) asks to people on anon, and leave (nice) comments and kudos on ao3. I used to interact some on LJ when anon kink memes were a thing. I am a part of fandom and have been for close to 20 years, I’m just not comfortable having any kind of public persona online that people can see, even if it has no attachment to my real name.

I know that the influx of new, young fans and the way they treat fandom the same as other online content creation/consumption is a problem. But fandom has always had lurkers. I do my best to positively interact in the ways that I am able to within my comfort zone, and I follow the rules of fandom etiquette. There’s so much pushback against lurkers now that was never there before, and I just don’t understand it.

It's a difficult line to walk, but there's a difference between going to a blog that has zero posts, zero likes, no header, no icon, not even a note that says "just lurking," and a person that's here to look at stuff that displays at least enough humanity to say "hey don't block me I'm just looking."

And look... yes there's always been lurkers. And there probably always will be. And it wasn't an issue for you or for creators or fandom in general, because it didn't hurt anything before. In just my living memory, fandom spent a while just being mailing lists- so creations/discussion went to everyone. There wasn't really anyone else to pass stuff on to, so it didn't matter if you just signed up and never said a word. Webrings based the spread of creation in the site itself, because everything was small back then. Livejournal had public and private communities that were searchable and creation was based inside of those communities, and interaction was based on commenting - what you're used to doing, and okay doing - meaning community was based in the comments and people linking to various communities. Back when places like deviantart and ff.net were pretty staple major sites for everyone, community formed in comment sections there as well.

And as much as I do love social media and the advent of community messaging systems... it's changed the face of fandom in ways that make lurking - and I do mean straight up no interaction, if you're sending messages and commenting, you're participating - break the links of community.

Look at it this way:

Back on LJ etc, it didn't matter if you, personally, lurked. Or even if 100 people lurked. Creations and community were centrally located. People all gathered to the same stable location (a post, or a community feed) to look at the things, and comment etc so if you commented or didn't, they could still find the creations. Sites like that brought people together. Now? *shakes head* Social media sites have divided us, and AI/Bots/Algorithms are conquering us because we disseminated too far.

Where do you go, on twitter, if you want to find fic? How do you find a conversation about something? Where do artists go so you can find groups of them and their galleries? You can scroll a tag, but anyone can put anything in that. I have literally no idea how tiktok works because every time I go on it, things just start scrolling past and playing videos for me that I didn't click. It's kind of horrifying. Instagram is... god, I don't even know how to classify that mess, but it's not a community. it's a museum. don't touch anything.

Tumblr is... it's not livejournal, it's not deviantart, it's not mailing lists or webrings but... it's people touching real people still, or it has the ability to be that if we continue to fight for it. As much as there are shitshows around here on occasion, it's still largely neighbors passing notes over the fences separating us.

But for as much community potential as it has, with the way it can function - with the way it USED to function, the way I REMEMBER it functioning a long time ago - it still separates us. There's tags, like on twitter, but anyone that tag dives (like me) knows what a hot fucking mess the tags can be, and there's no other central collection.

Tumblr's saving grace, though, is the ability we, the users, have to interact like humans. To share what we can with one another. To create networks that still kind of resemble the webrings of old, where you can come to one location (someone's blog) and find gateways to other blogs the way one page/site used to lead to the next so the separate, divided things spread across the world WIDE web don't get lost.

Except the link gets broken here, when folks just have empty blogs. There's (thankfully) no algorithm deciding what we should look at, but the trade off is that we have to be responsible for that step in fandom again. The way we used to be.

Not to mention that... there was never really a point for bots back in the LJ days. It would have been hard for them to survive because everyone knew at least some of the people. Not that there weren't, but it was harder and not rewarding for them to exist en masse. Now? Now bots use social media sites and users. Here, on tumblr, they follow accounts to make it look like they're legit to search engines. Whatever central account they're using to scam people, it collects the bots and the network the bots make, and uses them to look legit, so they can scam people, so they can spread viruses, advertise porn or whatever they're doing. They're exploiting users here, and they do this by following us.

And the ONLY recourse we have? is guessing that they're bots and blocking them. Because reporting a blank blog won't get tumblr addressing the issue. So, when someone lurks in a completely faceless, anon way, a way that makes them look like a bot, then the people who are being followed are going to learn to treat them like the bots that are trying to exploit them to do bad things.

And that's not on you! It's not your fault that they're doing those things, or that people have to react the way they have to react to curb that nonsense. And it's not your fault that social media wants to separate us so it can sell us whatever it wants and keep us from communicating and forming communities where we can entertain ourselves instead of feeding on their ads or whatever. It's not your fault that the way community functions on a human level has been backed into a corner by algorithms/bots.

But that IS the lay of the land these days. You and I have both been here long enough that we've watched the landscape shift. It's not the net we knew. And that's unfortunate. But it's probably not going to go back to the way we knew once upon a time. So people are pushing back against folks being quiet, because the alternative is to let algorithms win and do the talking for us. To let bots use us to hurt others. To let fandom founder because it's being directed by whatever AI is in charge of telling us what to look at.

I'm not going to tell anyone they can't be in fandom if they don't reblog stuff or make stuff or whatever. Just... that fandom is going to have a LOT harder time existing in this new breed of divided space if we don't reach out and connect and help one another connect to others, too.

[c-is-for-circinate]

Like, is the gist "Real life pedophilia/incest/rape is bad, and stories saying these things are good are bad, but including these topics in a story isn't inherently bad, so the people being like 'hey, maybe Ao3 shouldn't have so much kiddie porn there's an entire category called "Underage"' are just overreacting and making things worse?" Because it feels like you're saying, "your negative reaction to this stuff is valid, but also you're annoying and prudish and bad and really you aren't valid."

So here’s the thing: it really does not sound like you're asking this question because you want my answer, it sounds like you want to be angry with me and have a fight. And fair enough! I'm not terribly interested in a fight, but apparently this is my day to dive into this topic as thoughtfully and honestly as I can be. Maybe I'll say something you haven't already heard from other people before. Maybe not! Only you, anonymous asker, know that.

To begin with, you got part of the gist right. Real life rape (including child abuse/child sexual abuse as well as incest) is bad. Stories about rape, about underage sex, and about incest, are stories.

They're stories. They're pixels on a screen. They're not real. Whether they claim that rape is good, or bad, or sexy, or melodramatic, or life-destroying, or a normal Tuesday afternoon. They're stories.

And having a negative reaction to them is valid. Stories can stir up powerful emotions in people. It is absolutely, 100%, fair and valid and even normal for there to be certain tropes, plot elements, events, and kinds of content that make you upset and that you never want to see in a story you read, ever. You don't have to want to read about sex. You don't have to want to read any of it. That doesn't make you bad.

There are tropes, plot elements, events, and kinds of content that upset me. There are stories I won't read. The same is true of literally everyone else I know. Even though I know the stories aren't real. Even though I know the things happening in them are happening to fictional characters, who do not exist, who I cannot protect and who also cannot be harmed because they're not real. Even then, I can be made sad and scared and upset and hurt by reading those stories. And that is okay and that is valid and I am not bad or wrong for being upset about the story I've read, and neither are you.

But that doesn't mean the story doesn't have value to somebody else. That doesn't mean the story isn't important to somebody else.

What I see most often coming from antis, possibly even including yourself, is an overwhelming desire to protect. They want to keep themselves and others--possibly people they know, possibly hypothetical people they may never meet--safe from being hurt by these stories. And that desire to protect, also, is normal. It's even admirable! The problem, though, the thing that does more harm than good, is when that desire to protect drives people to lash out against things that matter to other people.

There is a difference between actual rape and stories about rape. There is a difference between a story that could theoretically hurt somebody, someday (which is all stories, always), and a story that hurts you personally. And there is a difference between a story that hurts you personally, and a story that is inherently poisonous to everyone who touches it.

We know--absolutely, scientifically, incontrovertibly--that stories about rape do not make people rapists. Yes, even the stories where the rape is there to be sexy. Even stories where the person being raped is a child. Even then. Fiction is not the same thing as normalization; again, there are far smarter people who have written far more extensively on that topic than I, and next time I come across something that goes more into detail on this point I promise I will reblog it. If this really is the thing you're afraid of, I may not be the right person to convince you that this is an unfounded fear, but I know someone out there can elaborate on it.

(Unfounded, which is not the same thing as invalid. My mother's claustrophobia is unfounded; it flares up in many situations where there's no physical threat whatsoever, where she has plenty of space to move and air to breathe. It's still real. It still chokes her. It's still valid, she is not bad or broken to feel that way, and she still can't drive through certain tunnels. The fear is real. But the thing she's afraid of can't physically hurt her, and that is worth knowing in terms of how she deals with it.)

We know, absolutely, scientifically, and incontrovertibly, that stories about rape and many, many, many other things can hurt and even traumatize their readers. Even though the situation you're reacting to is not real and you receive no physical injury, you can still be hurt by it. The key word there, though, is readers. The fact that the horror genre is out there terrifying people who enjoy being terrified for fun does not damage me unless I do something stupid and try listening to the Magnus Archives again and end up tense and miserable and paranoid for the rest of the week. The fact that guacamole is apparently delicious to everybody else in the world does not hurt me unless I do something stupid and order the wrong thing at a restaurant, and end up itchy and miserable with a little trouble breathing for the rest of the night.

The fact that there are, yes, tens of thousands of fics on AO3 in which characters under the age of 18 have sex? It can't hurt you. Those fics do not hurt you by existing. They can only hurt you if you read them. They can only hurt anyone who reads them. That's why there is an 'Underage' tag--and it's worth noting, 'Underage' is a warning, not a category. Nobody wants you to get hurt reading the wrong fic, any more than the sushi chef wants my throat to swell up because I ordered something with avocado. Literally nobody wants that.

The flip side, of course, is that you hating each and every one of those fics individually and as a group doesn't actually hurt me, or anyone else who writes, reads, or enjoys them. By itself. You can hate anything you like, and fic writers can write anything they like, and it all comes out in the end, more or less. Except.

Except that reading fic is always, entirely, 100% opt-in, and online harassment isn't even opt-out. Some antis have a nasty habit of going after writers whose content they don't like; climbing into inboxes and comments sections, calling those writers nasty names, throwing around cruelties and aggression and insults. I know that's not the same thing as simply disliking a genre, or even passively disagreeing with its existence (although disliking a genre and disagreeing with its right to exist are also very different things). I know not all antis do that. I don't know you, anon, but based on the speed and aggressiveness of this response to my last post, I can't help but wonder if you would do that.

And that does hurt people. Just like it might hurt you if someone threw a bunch of content that makes you uncomfortable into your inbox. Including the harasser, actually--because getting into fights with strangers on the internet about things that make you angry, sad, defensive, and upset isn't good for anybody. Including both you and me.

Anyway, after yet another lengthy ramble, let's get the tl;dr response to your ask here: nobody is ever bad or wrong for disliking certain content in their stories, no matter what that content is. You and your emotions are valid. The "overreacting and making things worse" part isn't about what you feel, but what you do with it. Constantly engaging with places where the thing that upsets you will probably show up, even to argue and try to fight it, will make things worse in the sense that now you're spending way more time thinking about this thing that makes you upset and angry, thereby leaving you more upset and angry. Getting together with a bunch of your upset, angry friends to make your feelings everybody else's problem? Makes fandom a more toxic place for everyone else involved.

Don't read stuff that's going to hurt you. Don't make other people read stuff that's going to hurt them. That's the whole thing, really.

[twopoppies]

So I read the post about tellmeitsnotlove account and posts getting deleted and in your tags you said it was Sony. Can you expand on why you think that? This isn't just a Tumblr mistake? Why would Sony do this now in 2022. I've read about larries getting shut down during 1d days when they were actively being closeted and that makes sense. But now? Harry and his team continously put out larry things for us in the fandom or as part of marketing, however you look at it. Just in the last couple of days someone figured out about the Louis merch and Harry you are home doors lining up exactly. They want us talking about things like this and keep the fandom active. So why go and delete a detailed larry Tumblr that can keep fans educated and engaged. I dont get it.

Gabi’s blog was deleted two years ago. Out of the blue, without warning or explanation. It came at a time when we were being flooded with a huge amount of new and returning fans because of quarantine. Everyone knew about Gabi because she had the most extensive, most organized, most accessible tagging system and all it took was a few hours of digging and it became very very clear that there was something very shady going on. There was just a ton of proof, timelines, receipts about babygate, closeting, deception… all right there.

Tumblr doesn’t give a shit about individual blogs. Even with people complaining about them. They literally stonewalled Gabi and didn’t answer a single message from her for months (while they quickly answered other peoples messages, until they found out which blog we were referring to. Then we, too, were ignored). Someone instructed them to remove her blog. I don’t care if that sounds like “tin hatting”. It’s just obvious that’s what happened.

But we consoled ourselves with the wayback machine and the thought that “well, at least any reblogs of hers still exist” because even when you delete a blog, or an original post, it doesn’t delete the reblogs that exist.

Unless Tumblr decides to delete them all. And that’s what they’ve done. It’s not a glitch. It’s targeted. I’ve never heard of this happening to anyone on this site. Yes, blogs get deleted. But I’ve never seen a person’s account so systematically wiped out of existence.

I don’t know why it’s taken two years, unless maybe there’s been some sort of legal filing that required a certain period of time to take effect. And I don’t know that it’s Sony, but who else would have the power or the inclination to clear her posts?

I don’t think it has anything to do with Harry and Louis signaling or their teams wanting larries around. I just think Gabi had too much information collected that pointed to a whole lot more than just the fact that “Larry is real”.

[padawansuggest]

Okay so I’m not reblogging the original post cause I made it sorta long and I don’t wanna clog up anyone’s dashes and such, but I have some more ideas. I tagged the post ‘Mandalorians adopt ferals’ and all posts with that will be tagged that too, so, follow that to find more.

I’ve decided that the Jedi creche has wookie creche masters (I don’t care what AU it is literally my fave characters of any AU will always be wookie creche masters. They give the BEST hugs and tell super old stories and even have pics of Yoda as a youngling) and so when a Mando’ade Wookie approaches Jaster and Jango to get their ferals something to eat and blankets, Jaster and Jango actually expect the ex-jetti to be a little more nervous about this massive wookie comin up on them.

But Xanatos and Obi-Wan were temple raised and that instills a lifetime of reaction in them. They are attentive and listen quietly to the nice wookie that just wants to give them blankets and food (they were super nice and gave Obi-Wan post-starvation portions but he’s kinda grumpy that Xanatos got more spices than him but he’s less likely to throw it up if they give him a little more flavor) and they’re finally warm and fed and ready to just… give up and let someone else fix this shit.

There are a lot of Sith headcanons out there and idk and idc about most of them, because I don’t really like any Sith AUs, but I like the idea that without the force to compound his anger, Xanatos is just beyond exhausted. He’s depressed and exhausted and can’t stop crying and self hatred and can’t stop thinking about what he’s done but also what Qui-Gon has done to him (and now, to Obi-Wan too) and he’s just done. That drive he had for revenge and power is just gone. He just wants to sleep a million years.

Obi-Wan, on the other hand, is sort of still terrified. He’s surrounded by Elders rn and he’s been running for his fucking life from just about everyone he meets for a solid 6 months now, he’s gone through torture and slavery and now that his collar is off again, he can FEEL the love and concern these adults are giving him, but it’s still terrifying.

He clings to Jango (and sort of Myles, who was the one to help remove the collar) because younger (tho still 20-22) and oddly enough, the nice wookie. He still grew up in the creche and him and Xanatos know that Wookies love cubs more than just about anything. So. Jango. Maybe Myles. Def the nice old Wookie who says he’s 1.6k years old. That’s mega old. And he supports the new Mand’alor???? So Jaster must be a good guy if he’s got support from a Wookie who also supported Tarre Viszla too.

By the time Dooku shows up it’s to see his ex-grandpadawan in a depressed slump on a cot (Jaster is swapping between running their forces to find the Death Watch so they can get off this planet and find some mind healers, and taking care of the tired man in his tent trying to become one with the mattress) and his OTHER ex-grandpadawan hiding from everyone except the alor’ade and a nice wookie who’s wrapped him up in blankets and such, lookin half starved and changed into someone’s kid’s overalls.

He is immediately a fuckin mess. His grandbabies went missing and he’s been petitioning the council to bar Qui-Gon from any more students for years and then his OTHER grandbaby goes missing and he finally finds them both lookin like life has used them and abused them and he was right!!! Qui-Gon needs to be barred from anymore kiddos!!!! He’s already ruined at least two!!!

He’s the one who’s finally able to coax Xanatos into a semblance of life again, mainly by creating a force bond with him as soon as Jaster lets him near enough, and Obi-Wan’s crying again because this is just gonna be one more master who leaves him behind for another student and he’ll never be good enough for anyone and Jango is trying to coddle him into calming down so Dooku makes a bond with Obi-Wan too and now Obi-Wan is hiding in Jango’s lap all embarrassed and refusing to come out cause he was crying like a baby over not getting enough attention and Dooku is gonna end up flailing here, he’s got his work cut out for him dealing with these two now. Oh god he’s got some fucking work to do.

Obi-Wan accepts Dooku being his and Xanatos’s stand in master till someone can come to take over their care later. Dooku says he kind of wants to bring in Master Sifo-Dyas for Obi-Wan, considering their gifts are similar enough, but he’s also asking Master Nu to come out with him (which perks Jaster right up cause the woman has blocked every number he’s sent her messages under and he just wants to see the goddamn archives in person plzzzzz) and tbh she might end up being the one to take Obi-Wan on with Sifo-Dyas together because it would be good for them.

Xanatos says he doesn’t wanna be a Jedi Knight so maybe just giving him to the mind healers is best, so now they have mind healers coming out too.

Anyways. Xanatos is depressed and Obi-Wan is a whiny baby who just REALLY wants to get the attention he never gets for once and as soon as Dooku realizes he can give Obi-Wan a bond with Jango and Jaster he’s fuckin gonna cause this kid deserves some attention for once and Obi-Wan is just so sad and self hating but also terrified of adults and he just deserves someone he can count on fully for once. He’s just a little guy. The nice Wookie is gonna be the best ba’vadu ever.