#I like Bee with his little horns; they’re cute

[chiliger]

For your ask game (if you're still going lol <3) may I suggest Bee as 4A in Spongebob?

How can anyone say no to that face?

Eh, maybe Megatron

[mossyscavern]

This world is not made for you

___________________________

‘That *pant* *pant* was too close.’

Cliffjumper thought, breathing heavily as he stayed hidden, clutching his carrier bag and the scavenged energon like his life depends on it.

Ever since the war between autobots and decepticons, cliffjumper survives by scavenging for energon in decepticon territory, it’s a life and death experience but it’s all worth it in the end.

He isn’t an autobot nor a decepticon and he likes to keep it that way, less likely to look like the enemy of either side. Even then he’s still a danger to himself. ‘They’re gone, gotta move.’

He thought, placing his bag on his back gently and made a run for it. Out of decepticon territory, into an abandoned energon mining shaft, through the rocky exterior… and into the makeshift home he built, venting heavily.

His vents aren’t built for this yet, he’s still a youngling. A youngling in a very cruel war between two sides of the same shanix.

With deep, greedy, heavy breaths he put the energon cubes down, removed the bag from his back just as gently and sighed, carrying the bag like a new born sparkling, now safe from the destruction.

“Safe and sound…” he says out loud, off lining his optics for a couple of kliks. They online when he heard binary babbling and movement, making the youngling chuckle and look down at the bag.

“Alright, alright.” He says, opening the bag revealing a sparkling. Yellow frame with a similar helm as his own, aqua blue optics blinking tiredly.

The little sparkling looks up and immediately coos and beeps happily, reaching out for cliffjumper’s faceplate. “Hi bumblebee, I’m assuming you’re hungry.” He asks, taking the sparkling out of his bag and cradles the tiny bot.

“Here, don’t drink it too quickly, little brother.” He says to the sparkling, making sure the liquid doesn’t spill all over his brother’s faceplate like last time.

By the time he finished half way bumblebee pushed the cube away and look up at cliffjumper with a pout, it confused him at first.. until he finally gets what he’s trying to say “I’m fine bee, I had my fill already.” He tries to say, but bumblebee huffed.

Pushing the half full energon cube towards cliffjumper and pouts… making the red mini bot huff a laugh. “Oh alright, only because you’re my brother.”

He told the sparkling, drinking his half of the energon bee offered, by the time cliffjumper finished he looks back down with a raised optic ridge. “Happy?”

The sparkling giggles and reaches for cliffjumper, obviously happy despite the situation. “You are lucky you’re so cute.” He says, rocking his brother back and forth, soothing him into sleep mode.

For a bream, cliffjumper heard distant sounds from outside, making the red mini bot furrow his optic ridges in confusion before his optics widened.

“Sorry, bee.. we can’t stay. We gotta go.” He told his sleeping brother, grabbing the makeshift bag, made specifically just for bumblebee to sit comfortably while he scavenges.

He placed bee back in the makeshift bag, it wakes bee up, thanks to the movement cliffjumper is making. “Ciff umber.” Bumblebee says tiredly, staring up at cliffjumper with cyberpuppy eyes.

“I know, I know… I’m sorry, but I promised caddie.” He says, closing the bag back up making sure his sparkling brother is secured, bumblebee is safely hidden, other than his horns peaking out.

Cliffjumper nods in approval and crawls out the makeshift cave. Preying to primus below nothing bad happens if they step out in the open.

With a sigh from his vents, he closes his optics, remembering what his and bumblebee’s carrier said and repeats. “Tomorrow is another day, And we won't have to hide away.” He says, looking behind him at his sparkling brother.

You’ll be a mech, bot! He hears, the voice of his carrier echoed in his helm, finally repeating the last phrase he heard from his parental unit with a determined look on his faceplates.

“But for now it's time to run, it's time to run!”

___________________________

Phew! Wow, damn.

Ok, long story short… I watched the first episode of transformers war for cybertron: siege for a bit, had let my own thoughts wonder, it gave me an idea… and I came up with this. I’m just as shocked at myself as you guys.

Plus, wholesome sibling moment! … i don’t have any other reason.. I just wanna write a sibling moment between a baby sibling and an older sibling.

[w1yre]

(i decided to compile janette’s information into one post, but it’s all the same stuff i did for mazie just combined into one)

(@/cloudysunflowrs made this template!)

julie’s lovely little cousin!!!!

janette’s relationship with the neighborhood :3

julie

cousins!!! they love each other!!! they’re besties!!! and they both love to play games and dance around with each other and fight with frank LOL

sally

janette and sally are both girlfriends !!! janette likes to play the princess in sally’s plays, while sally is the knight. janette admires sally’s creativity and loves her passion for the arts!

poppy

janette likes poppy! she likes to chat with her, and wishes she would come outside more :( she likes to bake with poppy, and even teaches her how to play board games or to play card games

eddie

janette loves eddie!!!(in a platonic way)

they’re best friends, and janette likes to stop by the post office and help eddie out while she tells him all about what she’s heard that day. she also likes to watch horror movies with him :3

wally

she thinks wally looks like a little dumpling, and likes to squish his little cheeks because he’s so cute!! she often gives him apples that she finds, and likes to watch him paint

howdy

she likes howdy! she likes to make small talk with him and show him her dance moves in exchange for products. it’s very fun between the two of them methinks

barnaby

janette likes barnaby! she thinks he’s very funny, and likes to sit and watch his stupid comedy specials that always get a hoot out of her. 10/10

frank

she thinks he’s a little too grumpy, so she teases him until he starts laughing. she likes him, though, and especially appreciates when he saves her from the bees

facts about janette!

she’s dumb ☠️

her favorite color is yellow-green

she only has one horn because the other one never grew

she has an hourglass body

she is about 3 feet tall

she can tap dance

her favorite type of dancing is ballroom dancing because it makes her feel like a princess

her favorite animal is a bunny

she likes to sunbathe

she likes pineapple on pizza

her favorite game to play with her cousin, julie, is hopscotch

she likes to host sleepovers with eddie

one time she and eddie were making bread pudding and she got her hand stuck in the pan…

she is very scared of bees

she has a fear of peanut butter

she’s very strong!!

she likes to play tennis

her favorite movie is “it’s a wonderful life”

she likes clowns

she doesn’t like any ice cream but black cherry

[funhouse-mirror-barbie]

Rating Hazbin + Helluva Boss Characters based on if I could tell what animal/creature they’re supposed to be:

DISCLAIMER: This is not an attack on the creators or artists/designers for either show. I already went over the purpose of this on my first post here—I just like to review stuff.

Part 2!

SIR PENTIOUS—SNAKE—5/5

Yeah that’s a snake, man.

While I find some of Pent’s design elements cluttered, he’s actually one of the stronger designs in my opinion. I think the having his cobra hood act as his hair is fun and cleaver. It’s very easy to tell he’s a snake. Not sure why he has eyes on his tail/body? I think they could have just made them red spots but eh.

QUEEN BEE—FOX (?) WITH HONEY BEE ELEMENTS (?)—3.5/5

Bee’s a weird one for me b/c while her design is super super cluttered I can SEE how it could work, and I really do like fun cute fox and wolf girls. The ONLY reason that docked points is b/c she’s supposed to be a fox/bee hybrid (I believe?) but her “bee” elements are so minute that if I hadn’t seen her in a big beehive, I would have just assumed she was as a fox with fairy/insect elements—I wouldn’t have thought she was connected to a honey bee at all. It’s a weird case where she is VERY obviously a fox but it’s not obvious at all that she’s a bee/honey bee. I did want to give a little extra half-point tho b/c I do like her little antennae ears. They’re pretty much the only thing that screams “insect” to me.

STELLA GOETIA—SWAN (?)—3/5

I think I may be going a little easier on the Helluva cast b/c overall they’re easier to figure out what animals they are. I’ve heard that Stella is supposed to be a Swan but I’m not 100% sure. This one is def more on me, but I initially thought that she was either a secretary bird due to her long lashes and the way her hair is styled, or a peafowl (which would make sense b/c her brother is apparently a peacock?) at least I can tell that she is a bird and her colors are accurate for a swan’s. I think the reason I would never have thought of her as a swan is mostly due to her beak size and color. But yeah b/c I can at least confirm that she is in fact a bird I wanna give her a higher score.

I would rate Pilot Stella too, but I don’t think at that point she was meant to be a swan, just a vague bird demon lady. At least I hope not.

MAMMON—SPIDER (OR CENTIPEDE? MAYBE??) —0.5/5

So. Like Angel Dust. The only reason I know that Mammon is a spider is because he was shown sitting on a giant spider web.

I really didn’t think he was a spider/spider-ish looking at all and I still don’t. Even the extra eyes they add to him sometimes didn’t immediately make me think “Spider!” just that it was a demon thing. He really just looks like a jester with extra arms.

His full demon/mega form also doesn’t look very spider-ish tbh, and was what made me wonder if he was actually supposed to be a centipede? I was really disappointed by his “final form” because it’s pretty much the same as his regular form but with more eyes and what I assume is SUPPOSED to be a spider abdomen ?? But then he does kinda scuttle like a centipede at the end so maybe he is supposed to be???? But then why does he have a big spider web???

Also, and I’ll be honest, this is just me being needlessly nit-picky and it’s a small thing but it just irks me personally b/c I don’t understand the reasoning behind this but like. I HATE that his extra eyes DO NOT stay consistent.

The first time we see his extra eyes it gives him a total of 8 so I was like “oh okay yeah so maybe just his final form will be a spider/spider-like BUT THEN HIS EXTRA EYES KEEP OSCILLATING BETWEEN 3 and 4 EXTRA EYES?

These shots are only a few seconds apart like why did they give him MORE eyes when he got farther away? They’re so small that they barely seem distinct? Like if he IS supposed to be a spider you don’t have to keep giving him eyes!!! Stop, stop, he can already see!!! 😭

Maybe he IS a centipede tho? B/c he DOES seem to have the little centipede butt horns (which apparently are just their very hind legs in real life)

And he def seems to move like one in that form. Man idk. Why even HAVE him in a spider web then???

Being an arthropod lover and not being able to figure out what the fuck kinda guy that’s supposed to be is driving me wild tbh 😅

Honestly if Mammon was just supposed to be a clown/jester I would have given him 5/5 b/c yeah that was immediately obvious. But it’s him being a jester-spider-centipede-thing that muddles things for me.

I would put Loona in here but I ran out of pictures for this post talking about Mammons eyes. She gets 5/5 cause. Yeah that’s a classic wolf girl.

[applecherry108]

Your Cherub choices for the Deadly Sins are interesting, would you mind explaining who is who? Some are obvious but for others it is confusing.

Totally!

A bit of preface: I based these cherub designs on the forms Lucifer took during his fight with Adam, so I was limited by that. Also, I’m obsessed with the rings of hell being color coded, so they’re also color coded lmao

(also what a great excuse to post the cherubs individually. Thanks!)

Satan: Sin of Wrath, Virtue of Patience

Since we haven’t seen Satan yet, he’s a bit of a wild guess, but of the forms I had to choose from, I thought Horse fit him best. We know the Wrath Ring has a western/cowboy aesthetic, and we’ve heard Bee say he’s hot without a shirt on, which made me think of the phrase “hung like a horse.” 😅 Plus, I think horses are a great representation of the dichotomy of wrath/patience—it takes a lot of patience to keep one calm, and they can do a lot of damage when riled up.

Also, the icon for his app we’ve see kinda looks like a horse skull, so here’s that next to Bombproof as a comparison:

(side note: for no other reason than Because I Can, I gave him the coat colors of Epona. Because orange. 😂😂)

Beelzebub: Sin of Gluttony, Virtue of Temperance

Only at this moment do I realize Lucifer never took the form of a bee, but because we’ve seen multiple bee cherubs before it felt like a no-brainer. 😭😅 I made her the smallest of the cherubs because, as Temperance, I felt she should be the smallest/least of the virtues. I also headcanon that she’s the largest of all the sins physically, because why shouldn’t gluttony get to take up the most space lol. Also, while trying to adapt her more canine features into a bee cherub, I realized her shirt as a sin looks a bit like a bib as a cherub and I thought that was cute. :>

Mammon: Sin of Greed, Virtue of Charity

I know there’s a ton of debate about what Mammon’s true demon for is (whether of not he’s a spider), but personally I think he’s a centipede. Also, apparently some male centipedes can spin a web, which is cool. But as a visual metaphor, I think snake fits him really well. What better representation of charity than a creature that has no hands to hold on to things? And I would consider (within hellaverse lore), Lucifer giving Eve the apple an act of charity. Also, once banished to Hell, he’d sprout arms with which to grab lol.

I would also like to point out that I think his design is partially based on the sandworm from Beetlejuice, as a nod/inside joke to Fizz’s voice actor playing the broadway version of the character.

(Sources: https://www.deviantart.com/highvoltage-art/art/Sandworm-Beetlejuice-891922450 and https://sinnawii.tumblr.com/post/732544584927870976/caught-trapped-in-his-web )

Asmodeus: Sin of Lust, Virtue of Chastity

Alright alright—I know Ozzie’s extra heads are *technically* a ram and a bull, but I chose to base him on a goat. They’re all hooved animals. So…tomato, tomato. 😅 I also sorta liked the idea of “chastity” being a sort of “completeness” in heaven, which is why he has both sets of horns (like demon goats are sometimes depicted as). I imagine once fallen, there’d be a sort of…splitting, or ripping effect, creating the torn face in between, forever separating the two sides and creating the desire to “reconnect” them. (Yes I think Ozzie has every bit. All the bits. It’d seem silly not to lol)

Leviathan: Sin of Envy, Virtue of Kindness

Given that we’ve never seen Leviathan, and the Von Eldritch family is probably not Leviathan, I have very little to go on other than: a) ocean. octopus. b) virtue of kindness = many arms to hug with. 😅

(I’m really hoping Levi ends up being Cthulhu. Just. A Captain Davy Jones mf with an octopus for a head lmao)

Belphegor: Sin of Sloth, Virtue of Diligence

SHE’S A NIGHTINGALE. GET IT? FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE, FIRST LADY OF NURSING? BUT BIRD? 😂😂

Aight, but for real, I think it’s either confirmed or heavily implied that the baphotmet hellborn (the goats w candles on their heads) are native to Sloth, and I think that’s a really funny pun about “burning the candle at both ends” as a representation of Diligence morphing into a melting candle with excessive wax buildup. That sounds random, but I originally intended to draw Bel with a candle. But that…clearly didn’t happen. But I felt it was important to know. 😅 Also I envision cherub Bel was being that hyped up on caffeine, doesn’t sleep more than 2 hours, assistant that’s always on top of everything. The divine scheduler of heaven. 😂 And once fallen, her scheduling scroll burns to ash and she can finally relax. 😌

All in all,

I had in mind that all the cherubs actually enjoyed becoming demons, that they were finally able to shake off the constrictive and stifling demands of heaven and just get to be themselves. We’ve already seen that becoming demons didn’t make all of them shitty people (or at least, there was probably a learning curve that some/most of them conquered), because most cardinal sins on their own aren’t inherently selfish. Mammon almost by definition is selfish, which is why he sucks so much, and based on the pre-series lore Viv has mentioned about the Von Eldritch family, I think Leviathan is going to be a shitty or at least very toxic person, but I think Satan is going to have similar character traits as Tom from svtfoe. Like he has a short fuse, but he also does the workout app, so he’s clearly trying to channel that rage into constructive outlets lol.

[indecisive-dizzy]

Hi bestie I’ve been obsessing over DearDollops so badly that I’ve forgotten about Howdy/Daisey (any ship name ideas for them? I can’t think of one :,3) so yay ideas

I feel like the first few times they hung out (before they caught feelings/knew each other well) Howdy was a bit dismissive of Daisey, but not willingly. He’s just like that in the beginning, but he warmed up to them

Howdy loves their guitar playing, he plays piano with Daisey when they have free time

If Howdy becomes a butterfly, Daisey definitely helps him adjust and gushes over how pretty he is. They definitely comfort him if he has complicated feelings over it

They totally help Lizzy with her hotel, Howdy gives her business/financial advice while Daisey helps decorate and add some plant life to the hotel’s exterior

Unrelated but Lizzy’s hotel is called the Butter-Bee Hotel :3

Daisey was really nervous to introduce themself to Howdy’s family during the holidays, but they all got along great :D

Howdy met Daisey’s family and they all liked him, besides a couple cousins (WHY ARE THEY ALL HATERS-)

Daisey beat them up so it’s okay 👍

Idk why but I could totally see Daisey sleeping in late and Howdy (who woke up an hour earlier) would happily and energetically burst into the room and say something like “Wake up, my little flower petal!” (Or something idk any nicknames :,)), and he’d blow an air horn to wake them up

It does but Daisey throws a pillow at him in annoyance

Daisey isn’t the biggest coffee fan, but they love when Howdy brings them coffee in the morning. He knows just how they like it and he doesn’t bother them about it or ask them to try it another way

Daisey totally has stuffed animals there and cuddles them when they sleep. Howdy will never admit it, but he purposely pushes them off the bed in the middle of the night so he can cuddle his partner

He doesn’t cook often, mainly just throwing things into a pot and cooking them like that, so Daisey helps by buying him cookbooks so he can learn some recipes that aren’t just pre-made stuff you heat up

They feeds the birds whenever they can. Birds live Howdy, Howdy tolerates birds, and birds chase Daisey around for sport. Daisey is a little scared of them but they’re friend-ish with birds

Daisey has a fire phobia, so they try to avoid big fires whenever they can. Howdy helps them get used to them by taking them camping and making s’mores with them. They’re at a reasonable distance and they get a nice little treat out of it

Sometimes when Daisey sleeps in, Howdy just carries them in one of his arms while he gets himself and his bodega ready. Sleepy spouse gets carried around like a teddy bear

Barnaby totally cracks jokes about it whenever he comes by the bodega and Howdy’s just carrying his spouse like that

Fluffy fur is perfect to bury your face in! 10/10 Daisey would definitely recommend

I’m so insane about them omg I love them

*cracks knuckles* Ow- I have little in terms of ship names, as I have been stumped! But I'll give what I got! plus bonuses hehe

FlowerShop or FloralShop

GardenSale

HowdyaDaisey (long, but based on Howdys full name)

CaterpillarFood (This is a Joke lol. Some caterpillars eat daisies, I thought it was funny)

Bonus: InStitches (unfortunately would fit Barnaby/Daisey better. but that ain't happening(?))

anywho! I think howdy is dismissive of everyone until he gets too know them more. like he's gotta put down the business (scammer) persona and see them as more than customer

Howdy playing piano is a hill I will die on <3 thank you I love the idea of them playing music together

Butter-Bee Hotel is an amazing name and sounds edible. I'm going to eat it <3

Howdy advertises the air horns but adds a warning label "Warning: May result in pillow to the face" lol

Jealous Howdy is funny especially over stuffies. Insert that meme "Me, my spouse, and their pile of various stuffed animals" ajfnahfhjfj

Buying Howdy a cookbook sounds cute, don't get me wrong, But this is Howdy Pillar. Howdyadoo (middle name pending) Pillar. He loves his spouse but he doesn't have the time of Day to be learning "from scratch" recipes. He thinks he's got it all figured out and doesn't need "some, lovingly gifted, book" to tell him how he should be eating his dinner.

He will then Turn his four legged ass around and cook Daisey a full course meal from the book. Because he's (a simp) got to prove that he Can cook.

cough- uh anyway birds! Why are they mean to Daisey? Howdy go shoo them away

Step 1: Carry Tiny Spouse. Step 2: ??? Step 3: Profit.

Alternatively

Step 1: Be Carried By Large Husband. Step 2: ??? Step 3: Profit.

Barnaby would joke and Howdy would have to shush him so he doesn't laugh to hard and wake Daisey up, if they aren't already.

[pastelpaperplanes]

Big Ol Ask Post Pt. 3 I think

I haven’t drawn anything other than cursed or plain technical stuff w him 😔😔 have these for now but expect more soon!

anon a way back asked what he’d look like next to Overlord being already so big compared to Megs, that’s why you see Lordie if you’re wondering why he’s thrown in that line up!

by the way I have a voice claim for the big purple simp— Jenner from NIMH, he’s so awful but that suave baritone oh it fits too well >:] it’s the ‘humble servant’ line that got to me

Yep! Pharma is absolutely in this AU—as well as the CFau and Crack one too—and in all, he’s still an estranged medic long since booted from any legal work back on Cybertron.

He lost his credibility and more all those years ago when he found himself willing to do his fair share of cutting corners and hastily concealed malpractice to expedite his dream of getting his name down in the medical books—ultimately impressing his dear Mentor Ratchet, finally, in perfecting long-since banned risky experiments and surgeries—not to mention cruel and unusual temperament with the (supposedly) taboo practice of non-medicinal mnemosurgery.

His ambitions and aggression always got the bet of him, this hasn’t changed since he found himself working in freelance outposts. Light years away from Cybertron, he’s made a name for himself as a Good Doctor—but to his under-the-table black market part-dealing clients, he’s just about as bad as a Crooked Medic can get.

Bounty hunters and Arms Dealers like him for his business, a certain DJD member likes him for the occasional berth company and seemingly never ending supply of fresh T-Cogs—but no one actually likes him for his nasty temperamental personality, save for a young and naive Ratchet once upon a time.

Pharma is a roamer, as of recent he’s been a hard to reach mech—seems as if he’s found a little project to keep himself pretty occupied in the last few decades—something about a breakthrough for aiding the Decepticon Energon Crisis :] him and a small, horrifyingly cheerful surgeon are well on their way to completing their first trial batches, it’s safe to say that their little synthetic mixture will have it’s users sated and compliant.

they’ve got that amazing ‘new car smell’ those first few weeks, and instead of chittering like an Insecticons or vibrating their wings like a seeker—they beep and squeak, sometimes even honk a horn depending on the baseline altmode coding, to get their Creators’ attention before their vocalizer truly starts to kick online

It’s cute, but loud

Much like a seeker sparkling, they have to reach a certain ‘age’ (upgrade) to be able to transform completely, in between then they’re still able to rev those engines as a warning should they need it, as well as spin their wheels should they need a getaway HEELIES IF THEYRE LUCKY WOOHOOOOO—for seekers they can hover on their thrusters!

Crusade is actually pretty formal with Megatron. But yeah as a kid, Megs was always known as Carrier, but as Sadie got older and more aware of their surroundings—they definitely came to learn the true weight of that title and the fact that they were the progeny of the faction leader, a fact they should have really held onto with more pride. Not wanting to draw more attention to the already blatant favoritism (and nepotism) Crusade made a switch to addressing Megatron as Sir, My Lord, Lord Megatron, —ect. to better fit in with their fellow troops.

It bothers Megatron more than than he lets on. Crusade shouldn’t have to hide their high ranking as his child, the heir to the faction. Megs is their Carrier and can only order them around for so long, as their Leader however—pulling rank may just allow for their infuriatingly stubborn sparkling to listen to them should a day come where even a Carrier’s plea is dismissed.

Crusade does slip up every now and then and a ‘Carrier’ will slip—often hushed and annoyed though as Megs does like to tease every now and then, gotta remind them that they’re still his baby every once in a while :’)

Optimus however—whenever him and Crusade should truly reunite, will never be called Sire by Crusade, which they so heatedly established early on—Crusade never needed one and they don’t need one now, better to not let the title trigger those long-suppressed emotions. Sure enough though Optimus will get his moment.

actually no lmfao so you’re good! Eh, I haven’t mentioned much plot w them outside of them and Megs, plus bits of potential interactions with Optimus—so the rest of Team Prime is free game :D

For what I (hopefully will have) planned, their interactions with team Prime will be eh,,,interesting to each their own to say the least. Some more stressful than others BUT let’s not get into that until I’ve worked it out—for now I’ll just mention what they’re dynamics would be like when the drama of Oh Shit Boss Bot You’ve Been Hiding a Kid For HOW LONG has died down.

A usually touch-wary Crusade actually is the one to initiate a hug with Bulkhead, he’s the biggest and warmest and somehow is always happy to see them. Plus he tells cool recaps of Earth films and gifts them strange blobish paintings every now and then, all of which Crusade doesn’t exactly understand, but at least the colors are pretty.

Bee is annoying,,,which is what Crusade would say if confronted if they actually liked all the shenanigans Bee suggest they pull together, prank wars to the max, sparring for fun, video games?, DOUGHNUTS and RACES in the fortress halls??? Ahem. they are a super serious soldier, not a hooligan. But honestly, Bee is the one they seek out the most should they need an adventure, they missed out on a lot of this ‘fun’ growing up on the Nemesis—Bee seems to know how to balance a day of soldiering and dumbassery. sometimes.

Ratchet reminds them a bit too much of their Carrier than they’d care to admit. The medic is an old soul to his very core, perpetually tired but quick to snap into work mode, and sweet if you reallllllly squint. Sadie has been taught from day one to always respect medics, Ratchet obviously takes the cake on I’ve Seen Some Shit and for that alone Crusade both fears and admires Ratchet. Again, growing up on the Nemesis they didn’t have too many bots willing to talk much with them—but Ratchet (after he’s gone through his own lot of therapy, him AND Arcee. good lord) has a never ending pile of stories to share with them. Ratchet may throw in a few more colorful curses than necessary—which is SURPRISING bc Crusade thought they’d heard them all back home, but he’s entertaining and tells Crusade how it is, no sugarcoating. For that Crusade is grateful, there’s been too many half-truths thrown about to them in their recent years :’)

Ghost Prowl freaks them out—why does he deliberately have to be so sneaky?? Crusade has only met Prowl a fleeting handful of times (visits from the Allspark come with meaning, you know) and each time Crusade has been given nothing but odd riddles and poetic nonsense. Kidding. Prowl does like his wordplay’s but his given advice is always well meaning—the most firm and direct message Crusade has been passed though was probably most definitely “ Get those two cowards for mecha you call your Creator’s to stop fooling around with each other and SPEAK—at this rate it’s physically paining me that they haven’t begun Ritus and they’re not getting any younger”

Team Prime adores Sadie, they ask Megatron to see their sparkling photos every chance they catch him. And Crusade. hates it.

:) have

We’ve been here before, haven’t we?

[insertdisc5]

Hi!! I wanted to ask, in celebration of Deltarune CH. 2, do you have any updated thoughts and head canons about the game?? Like, y'know, similar to a previous ask about Kris in your Deltarune tag? Thanks!

thoughts on kris part 2 i guess???? (part 1 from ch1 here lol)

spoilers for deltarune like woah. this wont be kris focused just random thoughts on everything. thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk

not that many thoughts for this chapter tbh! EDIT LOL: this was a lie i have a lot of thoughts

-just in general i feel like the player isn't the only one controlling kris... like yes the player forced kris to do what happened in the snowgrave route but AT THE SAME TIME idk it feels like there's someone else too. just because of the terrifying voice i suppose. and also the jerky movement kris does every time they get their soul out? unless there's another reason for it... maybe getting your soul out means you walk weird lol

-BUT ALSO i feel like kris is 100% in control when they create fountains. idk it just makes sense kris would create them. to create another world, a better world, A WORLD WHERE THEIR BROTHER IS HERE PERHAPS? i do wonder why they get their soul out then though. i'm all for it sweetie! do whatever! i support you!

-(i am and will be playing deltarune with only kris' best interests in mind. i will not hurt anyone unless kris wants me to. dont worry my little meow meow im on your side! talk to me! no? okay ill stay under the sink its fine)

-speaking of asriel. SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER (starts crying) V-VACATION COLLEGE WHEN

-kris misses their brother so much it's so sad. if you make kris steal 5$ from asriel they take it "reluctantly"? talking to asriel online so often even alphys knows?? the google search?? GOING INTO ASRIEL'S GOOGLE SEARCH ROOM WITH THEIR EYES CLOSED BECAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THEY ALREADY KNOW WHATS IN THERE? THAT ONE IS LESS OF A MISSING THING BUT IM LIKE OH MY GOD

-the city walk with susie at the end makes it clear to me that kris really values susie's friendship... kris even sits with her if you spend long enough near the lake like aaaaah ;_;

-and even in snowgrave you spend your last acts with the final boss calling for your friends like YES there's a way bigger creepy aspect to this (kris as more of a Leader who Commands and commands their subjects to come) but still :'0 (and then noelle answers oh my god noelle im so sorry for the trauma)

-berdly. listen. listen. listen. liste

-berdly sucks but [berdly hurts his arm in the battle against queen if you don't save him because he doesnt want to hurt you] [berdly realizing smg's wrong in snowgrave and immediately taking steps to save noelle] berdly is my little crumb nugget. i will protect him.

-noelle. noelle. girlboss!

-like ooooh listen. hearing about the genocide path for undertale. made me go "that is SO COOL. i HAVE to experience it myself this is great. hehehe killing time" and like no regrets. i was fully enjoying the experience knowing i was an awful person. SNOWGRAVE THOUGH. i will never try this myself its too fucked up. casually grooming your childhood friend to murder people <3 and also acting like a weird stalker towards her <3 stockholm syndrome speedrun i will get all the info i can about this but i will never do this myself

-people remarking the kris/player>noelle relationship is similar to the relationship between player>chara in genocide path is like yes. chefs kiss. don't worry we just are making you stronger and everything will be fine "you made me kill my friend? and for what?" this is fine sweetie don't worry about it!!!!!!

-like the amount of details added to snowgrave, like if you equip noelle's watch she notices later? and her battle animations change as time goes on, she gets an ice shield and stops sighing in relief after battle? oh my god? oh my god.

-(berdly is not awake.) JUST KILL ME RIGHT HERE I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT BERDLY NOT BEING AWAKE!!!!!

-also why didnt he turn into dust. so many possible reasons. is magic a thing in the normal world and perhaps no magic means no dust (theres graves). maybe he isnt dead. maybe hes braindead. maybe he'll come back. either way that boy is now in the closet big enough to put someone in

-also dess' name probably being december AND THATS WHY NOELLE LOST THE SPELLING BEE?!?!??! FUCK ME UP!!!!! JUST FUCK ME UP!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

-also so many good pixel art this chapter. too many? i didnt need pixel art of cardboard noelle falling on the statue. like thank you but please. please it hurts my game artist brain.

-the expressions in this chapter were also top notch. all the unsettling noelle expressions like (i fall over face first)

-i threw away the ball of junk (which i already tried in ch1) and this time the game was like "ARE YOU SURE BC THIS IS A BAD IDEA" and kris felt bitter :'( (it deletes all your items in the dark world)

-i uh fucked up and skipped the susie+noelle scene bc listen last time ralsei mentionned seeing what susie is doing we missed some PRIMO LORE. turns out it just makes you skip the scene and you dont get anything new. welp

-speaking of ralsei well you know. he exists. but im stuck on him going "i just wonder what being ralsei-like even is...?" ralsei my dude there's so much i could say about this. do you feel like you can't be ralsei-like because you feel like you have to be asriel-like

-but also that makes no sense bc susie hasnt even mentioned ralsei looks like asriel. and i cant imagine asriel being so meek. so WHAT GIVES

-ralsei as kris’ “i wish i was a monster just like my bro and family and i’d look like asriel but with red horns [THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME] and my name would be something cool like ralsei instead of a boring human name like kris and im sweet and cute because thats how i act with asriel because ASRIEL MADE ME” theory because that would be cute.

-ASRIEL GOING TO THE CHURCH TO CONFESS HIS "SINS" WHEN "SINS" AREN'T A THING IN THE ANGEL BELIEF LIKE I KNOW THIS INTERACTION WAS TREATED AS A JOKE BUT WHAT THE FUCK ASRIEL?

-kris definitely has a connection with the big red door in the city, judging by what the kids say they probably went there... i feel like this place's dark world will be the Final Dungeon you KNOW some shit happened there. also the sounds you hear when you go there is the phone dark world call's sound slowed down? AND AFTER SNOWGRAVE APPARENTLY YOU CANT HEAR IT ANYMORE? HUWAH?

-speaking of songs the songs were all so good, My Castle Town rules, the berdly snowgrave music is stuck in my head, flashback is uwah wuahah, Until Next Time is so good, AND ALSO A FRIEND NOTICED THE DARK WORLD CITY THEME IS JUST tHE SONG 74 (MOST NOTICEABLE WITH THE SNOWGRAVE VERSION)?????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN????? it might be just "hey its just reuse" BUT MR FOX YOU KNOW WE'RE GONNA READ INTO THIS IS NOELLE THE ONE SINGING IDK BRO!!!!!!!!!!

-asgore dreemurr fired from the force what happun!!!!! game theory is that asgore is related to dess' death/disappearance but eh who knows

-you start the chapter at lvl2 and get to lvl3 after the final boss, a friend mentioned this is probably because we destroyed a world and im :0

-to go back to kris it's still so interesting to figure out who they are based on how they act/people mention them. like kris shaking the ferris wheel car? yeah makes sense i can imagine a pranking kid do this. kris' dance? yeah thats a little silly but i can buy it. doing cool anime poses? well i dunno this doesnt line up PERFECTLY but sure. BUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN SNOWGRAVE... especially >proceed like that is such a weird thing that i can't imagine them doing, but i can't completely see the "player" doing either (compare with going to sans -which kris doesnt know- and going "SANS!" because of course the player would know sans), like THATS one of the reasons i feel like there's someone else in there. the weird robotic merciless actions. if im going super meta it feels like there'd be someone else like writing the choices into existence for us to pick you know? gaster probably? god i need to read more gaster theories i completely sidestepped the gaster shit bc i wasnt interested. anyway just spitballing

-(looks at big shot guy) please dont make him the next tumblr guy i beg you

-obligatory "queen was great" mention if only because this part made me laugh a little bit too hard

that was a lot. thank you for letting me talk

[expectingtofly]

Claire Novak's (Surprisingly) Not-So-Lame Day

2k

this fic is written for @dean-has-great-taste as part of @starrynightdeancas' gift exchange. thanks sophie for organizing this, it was a lot of fun <33 and i hope you enjoy this, gen!!

*****

How did Claire find herself joining Dean, Cas, and Jack for an excursion to the mall?

Well.

Cas had texted her yesterday, with an extreme amount of emojis and emoticons that took some time to decipher, asking if she wanted to go shopping with him, Dean, and Jack. Apparently Jack needed new clothes and they needed a gift for Eileen’s birthday coming up, and maybe they could go bowling or something afterwards.

And normally she would’ve said no way because hanging out with old guys was lame and she didn’t like little kids, but she needed an excuse to get out of Jody and Donna’s weekend plans of cleaning out the garage. Plus, Kaia needed to study for a test—she actually enjoyed school, the weirdo—and had requested no distractions.

So that’s how she found herself sitting in the back of the Impala next to a carseat, listening to one of Dean’s old cassette tapes (which wasn’t too bad, but she’d never admit it).

“What’s that?” Jack asked, stretching against his carseat straps to jab at one of the pins Claire wore on her leather jacket.

“It’s the lesbian flag,” she told him. Cas looked back at them from the front seat, smiling.

“This one?” Jack pointed to the rainbow pin on her pocket.

“It’s the pride flag.”

Jack considered that for a moment before announcing, “I want one. And this one.” He pointed to the mothman pin on her lapel, then the big-eyed, green alien. “And this one... and this one, and this one.” (Alex said she had more pins than leather on her jacket, but sue her, she liked making her clothing her own).

Jack, it seemed, also liked… unique clothing. The kid was wearing rain boots even though the sun was out and overalls with embroidered flowers. He dressed weird, there was no way around it. But so did Cas, so there was probably no hope for him, poor kid.

“Okay,” she decided. “I know where to get you some.”

Jack beamed and swung his legs. “Don’t kick the seat,” Dean told him, and Jack pouted at him.

Claire was surprised Dean even let a carseat in his precious Impala. Pulling out her phone, she asked, “Can we listen to my music?”

Dean started to respond with a “Hell no,” but Cas spoke up first, “Of course.”

Dean spluttered as Claire connected to the bluetooth connector Sam had finally convinced Dean to install. The old man didn’t realize it was the 21st century, apparently.

“I wanna listen to Gaga!” Jack said, leaning over to look at her phone.

At first she thought that was some baby talk, then she realized Jack was into pop music. Ugh. But it would annoy Dean, so...

Leaning in conspiratorially with Jack, she let him scroll through her phone and choose which song to play. When “Born This Way” started filtering through the car, Dean groaned.

“Really?” he asked, sending her a glare in the rearview mirror. Mission accomplished.

Jack clapped along and Cas turned the music up louder. “Great choice, Jack,” he said.

Dean, for all his grumbling, didn’t turn down the music, and Claire caught him glancing at Cas, who tapped his fingers on his thigh to the beat. Dean looked like he was fighting back a smile and Claire rolled her eyes. Dude was so whipped.

When they parked at the mall, Cas grabbed Jack’s hand before he could sprint across the parking lot. “You have to look both ways,” he reminded him gently, and Jack nodded.

“Claire’s gonna buy me pins,” he said, jumping onto the curb.

“Yup.” Claire pat her jacket pocket. “Good ol’ credit card fraud.”

“Woah, now,” Dean started to protest.

“You and Sam are the ones who taught me!” Claire reminded him.

“We’ll pay for them,” Cas said, opening the door to the mall. Jack skipped inside, his rain boots squeaking on the tiled floor.

“We’re doing what now?” Dean asked Cas, taking his hand. Gross.

“Come on, Jack,” Claire said, catching up to the toddler. “Let’s go get you some style.” Over her shoulder, she called, “Meet up with you guys later.”

“Have fun!” Cas called.

“Don’t get kidnapped,” Dean added.

As they distanced themselves from the old geezers, Jack grabbed her hand, and Claire startled a little. “Do you like dinosaurs?” he asked.

Someone passing by gave them a smile, and Claire realized people probably thought Jack was her younger brother. She let him hold her hand anyway. “Sure.”

“What’s your favorite? Mine is the bon-ta-sore-us.” He sounded out the word carefully.

“Don’t know. What’s the one with the spiky horns?”

“Ti-ce-a-tops?”

“Yeah, that sounds cool.”

“That’s my second favorite!” He started jumping from one colored tile to the next. “And the T-Rex. That’s Dee’s favorite. And Dad likes the steg-a-sore-us.” He peered up at her. “Did you know he got to see dinosaurs? Right in front of him!”

“You know what that means, right?” He shook his head. “He’s super old. He’s basically a dinosaur himself.”

Jack’s eyes widened. “He’s a dinosaur,” he repeated in a hushed whisper.

“Yup.” Spotting Hot Topical, she headed that way. “You should tell him that.”

Inside the store, Jack let go of her hand to grab a stuffed cat. “Claire! Like yours!”

Claire rolled her eyes. “Yeah.” So, she still had the Grumpy Cat Cas had bought her. She wasn’t cruel enough to throw it away when the guy was trying so hard to make up for walking around in her dead dad’s body. Plus, the stuffed animal was kinda cute. Not that she was going to tell anyone that.

“Here ya go,” she told Jack, finding a box of pins at the register. She brought the box down to his level and Jack ran over to look inside.

“I want a Doc McStuffins pin,” he said, plunging his hand into the box.

“I don’t know if they have those.”

As they rooted through the box of pins, she heard familiar voices and looked up to see Dean and Cas walking inside.

“What are you guys doing here?” she asked.

“I like this store,” Cas said and Dean rolled his eyes. Among the pleather and black, Cas’ dingy old trench coat—over a Winnie the Pooh sweatshirt instead of a suit—and Dean’s ratty flannel and boots only looked more ridiculous. She took it back—even Jack dressed better than them.

“You guys don’t have to be in here,” she told them.

“What, we’re too old?” Dean asked defensively.

“Yeah, actually.”

Cas poked at a toy and it squeaked. God, could they be any more embarrassing?

“Dad!” Jack called, holding out a rainbow pin. “Look, they have soo many.” Cas joined Jack in going through the pins and Claire asked Dean, giving his outfit a meaningful look,

“Was the Army Surplus store too trendy for you?”

“Did they kick you out of Sephora for buying up all the eyeliner?“ Dean shot back.

Touché. In a truce, she held out a pin with the bisexual flag. She wasn’t really sure what Dean identified as, if he even gave it any thought, but guessed it was close enough. “For you.”

Dean rolled his eyes but took it. “I’m not weighing down my jacket with this crap, though.”

“No, ‘course not, that would mean having any sort of style.”

“Can I help you with anything?” asked an employee with two nose rings and jewelry up and down their ears— so cool. Claire saw the way their eyes flicked between them, probably thinking they made a weird group, and she took a step back, trying to silently communicate that yes, she was shopping with them, but no, she was not as lame as them.

“Just looking,” Dean told them.

“I like your drawings,” Jack said and the employee looked down at their arms which were littered with tattoos.

“Thanks.”

“My dad has a drawing. It’s Enochian.”

The employee—Wren, by the name tag—looked at Cas with new respect in their eyes. “Language of the angels. Sick.”

Cas looked pleased. “Thank you. It’s come in handy more than once.”

The employee went back to looking confused and, starting to walk away, told them to call if they needed anything.

“Do you want anything?” Cas asked Claire, and Claire looked through the box. She grabbed a pentagram pin and, seeming to copy her, Jack grabbed another one, clutching several pins already in his fists.

“You like bees, right?” Claire asked Cas, spotting a “Save the Bees” pin. She held it up for him.

Cas’ eyes brightened. “That’s a wonderful message.” He glanced back at Dean and frowned. “Dean, they’re not going to bite.”

Claire looked over to see Dean shying away from a few emo teens. “Look like it,” Dean muttered, joining them. Jack lifted up his hands, asking to be hoisted up. Dean set him on his hip and Jack showed him the pins he’d selected. He held a dinosaur pin to Dean’s collar.

“Do you want one, Dee?”

“He’s too lame,” Claire piped up. Not for the first time, she noticed the healed over piercing mark on Dean’s right ear and pointed to it. “Looks like he used to be cool, though.”

“Yeah, guess so,” Dean said dryly. His hand went to his earlobe. “Pierced it myself, in high school.”

“I think you’re still cool,” Cas told him, and Claire fake-gagged, making Jack giggle.

Cas took the pins to the cash register where Wren rang them up. Dean added the bisexual flag pin and Claire threw in a pair of spiky earrings, because, hey, they were paying.

“15.36,” Wren told them, dropping the pins into a bag.

“My dad’s a dinosaur,” Jack told them, trying to see over the edge of the counter. Wren raised an eyebrow, Cas looked surprised, and Claire stifled a laugh.

“Claire, help me,” Jack said, grabbing the bag from Cas as they exited the store. Moving to the side, Claire helped him attach the pins to his overalls. A smiley face, a pride flag, a grinning Stitch, a sunflower, a dinosaur, and the pentagram. The pins clacked as Jack tugged at his overalls, trying to look at them all. Overall, a chaotic look, but it kinda matched his vibe.

“Lookin’ good,” she told him, and Jack beamed.

“I’m like you!”

Alright, she wouldn’t take it that far, but, “Yeah, close enough.”

Cas attached the “Save the Bees” pins to his trench coat pocket and it ended up crooked. Rolling her eyes, Claire said, “Let me.”

She reattached the pin and stepping back to look it over, decided, “You could actually make that coat look cool if you added more stuff to it.”

Cas looked down at himself. “Thank you.”

“Nothing’s gonna save that sweatshirt, though.” Couldn’t let his ego get too big.

“Dean said he liked it,” Cas said, glancing back at Dean, who was shooting an evil eye at Claire. He quickly wiped it off his face and draped an arm over Cas’ shoulders.

“Yeah, it’s uh… Charming.” He guided Cas away from Claire. “Don’t listen to her, she still thinks sarcasm is a personality trait.”

“Screw you, old man,” she called. Jack skipped after them and she checked her phone to see Kaia had texted her: How’s everything going? They drive you crazy yet?

They’re so weird, she texted back. Then she added, They’re not too bad.

“Come on, Jack,” she said, hurrying to catch up with him, Dean, and Cas. “Let’s go get our ears pierced.”

“Yay!” Jack cheered. He grabbed her hand and tugged her down the mall.

“Woah, woah, you’re not doing that,” Dean protested like the wet blanket he was.

“You can get yours pierced too,” Claire told him, and he faltered,

“I don’t want, we’re not—“

“You know you want to.” She let Jack lead her away and Dean called after them,

“We're never bringing you shopping again!”

Grinning, she turned to shout over her shoulder, “You know you love me!”

[velvetafterdark]

Here have some fat boyes

Starsc/ream sneers at the steady force against his tender middle that he can’t see. 

“Don’t you poke me, now.”

As if on cue, nubby little horns prod at the sensitive mesh. He can barely utter a complaint; it hurts to think too hard.

“Bumblebrat.”

“Shush...” Bumb/lebee whimpers right back. Though Starsc/ream can’t see him over his gut, the buggy cradles his own swollen midsection. Getting comfortable is nigh-impossible, but he wiggles in Starsc/ream’s lap anyway.

In tune with its owner, the jet’s engorged stomach makes its annoyance known, roaring loudly in Bumb/lebee’s face, and squashing back against his poor little belly.

GWOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLlll....

“Starsc/ream, you’re squashing me.”

“Quit squirming,” Starsc/ream growls with no venom, completely at his own body’s mercy. “You’re lucky you’re allowed up here at all.”

“Whe/eljack will scold you if you kick me off.”

“It’s so cruel of you two to gang up against me like this; you know there’s no room in my lap.”

“You’re the one who was complaining that nobody was rubbing your belly when Whee/ljack had to go check on the rest of the food.”

“Not everything is an invite for you.”

Whee/ljack moseys back into the room.

“Aww...look at you two,” Whe/eljack’s voice lilts, enamored with the sight of his lover and friend snuggled up together. “All cute n’ soft. You cuddlebugs want dessert?”

Stars/cream winces, and Bumb/lebee is inclined to agree.

“Ugh...maybe in a bit, Jack,” he hiccups, wincing as Starsc/ream flops on his back and jostles him.

“Jackiiiie my tummy hurts so baaaad,” Starsc/ream laments, a hand flung over his forehead.

“Heh, you need a lil’ rub?”

“Mmmmmmn,” Starsc/ream holds his arms out, whining.

Whe/eljack maneuvers himself carefully, draping himself across Starsc/ream’s vast belly without putting too much pressure on it. For a while, he just rubs his rough hands over the pillowy paunch, gently massaging the sore belly.

“I’ll give you a lil’ rub too in a bit, Bee; you just know how this guy is.” 

“Nah, I’m good. I will do this, though--”

Bumb/lebee gathers up his strength to haul himself from Starsc/ream’s lap to Whe/eljack’s back, squashing the inventor against the fattened emperor.

“Augh! I’m in a tummy sandwich!” Whe/eljack laughs, sprawled out between the two.

Stars/cream moans loudly, complaining that they’re flattening him.

“I think you mean fattening,” Bumb/lebee stifles a hiccup, resting his chin on Whe/eljack’s shoulder. “Get ‘em, Whe/eljack; keep him down there until he learns some manners.”

“Stoooop!”

Starsc/ream’s wails go unanswered, as Whe/eljack is preoccupied with patting his pudgy cheeks.

“Gosh, you two are cozy. I could get used to this.”

“Aw, shucks; thanks, Whee/ljack,” Bumb/lebee utters before slipping into a food coma.

“Don’t ignore me!!”

“Nobody’s ignorin’ you, swee/tspark; we’re right here.”

Whe/eljack’s optics dim, clearly tired despite not stuffing himself silly like Starsc/ream and Bumb/lebee did. He falls asleep nestled against Starsc/ream’s chest.

“Jerks...” Starsc/ream huffs, though he’s finding himself too tired to keep fighting.

He resigns himself to being their mattress...

But just until he finishes digesting.

[headcans-oneshots-and-stuff]

Having to deal with a de-aged s/o... (No. 2)

A/N: Hey guys... I know I haven’t been active on here for over a month now and I’m really, really sorry, but I had a really hard time in my life lately and even though that’s not over yet and surely won’t be for another while I felt so guilty for not uploading anything on here that I decided to at least try to manage to get back to updating somewhat regular and finally get around to answering the many requests in my imbox. For now I decided to make a part two to this because it was one of the few ideas that actually sparked some inspiration in me. I’m really sorry for the rant and I hope you can understand my situation. And now: have fun with some of our best girls ;)

No. 1

Ochaco Uraraka

The day you almost flew away

rip

nah it wasn’t so bad

But first things first

same scenario as last time

You’ve been de-aged by someone and Uraraka has teh option between either taking care of you for a day or you’ll be brought to to your parents or a teacher or something

Best girl doesn’t even hesitate before she says yes 

She loves you so much and you look so so so so cute as a baby!!!!

Heart eyes personified

The only problem is she didn’t really think it trough

The first time Aizawa hands baby you to her she is so excited that she loses control of her quirk and let’s just say it’s a good thing Aizawa had his capture weapon with him, because otherwise

well

you’d be space dust

After that she tries to be more careful

BUT YOU’RE JSUT SO CUTE AND CUDDLY AND THE WAY YOU LOOK AT HER WITH YOU PUPPY EYES!!!

After the third time you almost floated away Momo finally has enough and makes one of these baby leashes for you

So class is spend with 25% learning and 75% percent oggeling at you floating and having the time of your baby life

The class loves you (except for the usual suspect Bakugo)

during lunch-break Uraraka proudly shows you around and the Dekusquad has the time of their life spoiling the shit out of you and getting you to giggle and laugh

After school she decides to take you out in the park and let’s just say getting you out of the tree your leash got caught up in was lesson enough to not let you flaot outside...

but still the two of you have the times of your lifes and she is so in awe with how cute and innocent and amazing you are as a baby

She’d definitly try to make you say her name just so that she could say your first word was her name, but that doesn’t really work out

One time she thinks you’ll finally do it, but instead you just burb making everyone laugh like mad man

at first uraraka is sad but soon she’ll join in

When it’s time to turn in she’ll definitly cuddle with you only to accidentally make you float when she’s already half asleep so she doesn’t release you

Wakes up to grown-up you poking her with the curtain rod

After that she sometimes starts talking about how nice it would be to have an actual mini you running around someday when both of you are grown-up and actual pro-heros...

Momo Yaoyorozu

THIS BEST GIRL WILL BE PREPARED!!!

She takes most things seariously and this is not different

She’ll most definitly accept taking care of you as a challege 

It’s not completely unlikely that when she’s finally a pro-hero that she could be in a situation were she has to know how to handle a baby or toddler

So expect to be seen as a training

but at the same time you’ll be spoilt as hell because she wants to make sure you’ll be the happiest damn baby there ever was

she’ll make one of these baby stap carriages and strap you to her chest

she melts a little bit at the sight of you clutching her top and cuddling closer to her

she’ll make all sorts of toys and baby stuff for you

Everything to be prepared

you start to sniffle?

There, now you have an amazing stuffy and a pacifier 

You seem to become restless and hungry?

Your baby-appropriat food will be ready and perfectly temperated in about a minute.

You do what babies usually do since they’re not adults?

Momo is prepared with Diapers and baby powder and stuff like that

She manages to keep you entertained and silent during class and honestly there’s little difference between this and how class usually is

(Also she’s one of the few who actually keeps in mind that you will be turned back soon and makes notes and everything so that she can explain everything they learned in class to you the next day)

During lunch-break she’ll take you out of your strap-thing and let’s you play with everyone in class she deems safe (that includes everyone except specifically Bakugo, Mineta and Denki, because she wouldn’t hold it above him that he’d accidentally shock you... We don’t have to talk about why Mineta and Bakugo are on that list...)

Denki will try the rest of the day to get to hold you tho and he will end up getting tied to a chair

After school she’ll too take you to her room and play some interlectually stimulating games and have you listen to some mozart

like she knows that there most likely won’t be any short-time effect, but you never know

also, don’t you dare tell anyone, but she has a guilty pleasure in dressing you up in cute little costumes that she made

like a cat-costume, or a little princess, or a little bee...

may or may not make pictures of you in a pg-mini-version of you in her costume that she’ll make her phone background.... who knows

When you become tired and she has to put you to bed she’ll actually dress you in very, very, very baggy clothes so that you won’t rip apart the baby clothes when you grow big again

She now definitly has a different view on taking care of children, she wouldn’t pass up on another opportunity to do so, but that has a lot of time to actually happen

Mina Ashido

THIS BEST ALIEN GIRL IS SO AMAZED 

Like Uraraka she is definitly in awe with how cute and little and baby-like you are

She does have some minor worries tho

She definitly wants to take care of you, but she’s a little bit afraid that you’ll get hurt by her acid

But when you giggle and laugh and try to grap for her as soon as Aizawa presents you to her she’s made her decision to risk it

If anything happens, if you even get the smallest cut or burn, you will be brought to recovery girl 

but spoiler alert! nothing happenes 

Before we get to the usual scenarios, let me just make a few things clear

Mina loves having you sit on her head, holding yourself up by her horns, she’ll definitly tickle you until you’re giggleing like a mad baby and, seeing as even Bakugo won’t hurt a baby (at least not until it really fucked up), she’ll se the rare possibility to prank him and use you as a protection

Bakugo will be seething until you’re turned back and he can have his revenge on her

so back to topic

She’ll probably be the one to just straight up go to Aizawa and ask if she can skip out on the day to take care of you and she’ll definitly teach you how to be a noisy annoying little baby beforehand so that Aizawa will have the choice between not having her and you in class or having a noisy little baby in class

he choses the first option

Mina will thank him, leave the room and you’ll immeditaly stop whining and start giggling

the rest of the time the others are in school will be spend with you on her head and her walking through the city with you

she’ll probably go shopping with you 

in as, she sits you down on a chair in front of the changing rooms and shows you different outfits

the ones that you clap and giggle at get bought the one you’re uninterested in get put back

when it’s time for school to end she’ll go back to the dorms and guilt trip Bakugo into making food for you (and her, but don’t tell bakugo that) 

He swears, he’ll bomb that alien girl away as soon as you’re grown up again

Also you know how people sometimes throw babies up into the air and catch them again sometimes?

Well, Mina has to go for pretty aliens and leaves you in the...good?... care of Denki, Ejiro, Hanta and Bakugo

it takes exactly 4.6 seconds after she left for Denki, Ejiro and Hanta to play Ball with you

In as you are the ball

and they are throwing you from one to the next

Sure, you might love it and have the time of your life, but Bakugo - who somehow finds himself as the most responsible one in a twist of faite - is going up the walls trying to get you without you getting hurt

When Mina get’s back Denki, Ejiro and Hanta are laying on the floor with charred clothes, while Bakugo is holding you like you’re a bomb threatening to explode every second now (how ironic considering who the explody boy is, right?)

He’ll just thrust you into Minas hand and stomp away

After that Mina will take you into her room and get you ready for bed

When you wake up the next day, you’ll definitly remember having to thank Bakugo, but that could become hard when you consider that he’ll be hunting after your girlfriend...

A/N: Who would you like to see next? I’m having some ideas...or would you like something entirely else?

[mcyt-apocalypse-au]

dad!schlatt au notes bc im soft:

BEWARE THIS IS SUPER LONG LMFAO I GOT CARRIED AWAY

this bitch has zero fucking clue about anything when it comes to toddler tubbo

he's probably great with new born tubbo because jesus christ this little ball of sunshine is such a blessing to him that he'll overcome any obstacle he presents

but no one warned him about mischievous toddler tubbo, poor guy tries his absolute fucking best to save the furniture and small figurines but his efforts are completely and utterly helpless

he's lowkey too scared to ask phil so he asks quackity instead and let's just say it did not end well

he gives up and knocks on phil's door at 2am with a football sized bruise on his cheek and a crying 1 year old tubbo that's cornered in paint, glue, twigs and leaves

he's so glad once that shit show is over and tubbo is grown up into a cute little kid

like at age six tubbo's horns start to grow and schlatt is the proudest ram dad you'll ever see

he'll literally brag about his son so much to everyone that will listen

he's often just overcome with pride everytime he sees his little champion

like when his were growing they hurt like a bitch but tubbo is super brave and just sucks up the pain to make his dad proud

and boy does it work, schlatt is so proud that he even ends up just sobbing in pride to his wife, she just chuckles as she pats hin on the back

his horns are fully grown by the time he's ten, they only hurt for the first few months so as soon as the pain stopped, tubbo wore them with even more pride than before because they're no longer delicate or vulnerable

if I'm being honest schlatt probably isn't the biggest fan of teenage tommy, but he brings tubbo out of his shell and they've been friends since they were three so he refuses to even consider bringing his dislike towards the chaotic teen up to tubbo

if they ever get into an argument he'll feel bad as soon as he walks out of the room, probably getting tubbo some kind of bee themed item to apologise, the kid has always loved bees

when tubbo was a kid he used little pet names like "kiddo", but they've just stuck into tubbo's teenage years, so much that schlatt has literally started doing it without noticing

"hey kiddo can you pass ke the salt?" "daaaaaad! you called ke kiddo again!" "huh? no i didn't? arr you imagining things tubbo?"

tubbo has just given up with trying to get him to stop at this point so he uses silly pet names or his own like "father dearest" and "old man" when joking around with him

what do you mean tubbo supported an opposing side during the elections? no no, you're mistaken, tubbo was his father's running mate! the father and son duo stood proud as their victory was announced

schlatt made the hard decisions and tubbo kept the peace, their teamwork was unrivalled

[dreamties]

Slashers W/ a Soft Pastel S/O

A/n - So this one actually wasn’t requested, I just thought it would be super cute. And what I mean by “Soft Pastel”, I mean being into soft/pastel/kawaii fashion, I just didn’t know how to phrase it. Since there’s so many subcultures.

Trigger Warning: Slight Cursing (I say f*ck)

Also- these are gender neutral, but a few describe you in skirts/dresses, so if you’re not comfy with that, just skip that part or the whole thing?? :/

I might do more like this for other types of alternative fashion- like punk or something? Or a S/O who has a lot of body mods, I think it would be fun.

Characters: Billy/Stu, The Lost Boys, Helen Lyle, Daniel Robitaille/Candyman, Brahms Heelshire, and Amanda Young.

I didn’t add Michael Myers, but can do so if y’all want it. I just think he’d be very indifferent about it...didn’t think that would be very fun to read.

Billy Loomis + Stu Macher

Stu would be the most like into your outfits

Billy? Not so much. he just thinks you look cute in everything.

but if you did more guro-kawaii looks? they would both be all over that shit. 

it combines more of the grotesque in with the cute- which is just perfect for the boys. they get to see you dawned in all sorts of blood, guts/gore, bandage patterns/aesthetics.

and maybe even tying in different monster-ish elements. 

like wearing funky white or other unnatural colored contacts, really intense makeup(especially around the eyes), and fuck it, maybe you’re wearing faux demon horns.

I think they’d find it kinda hot. if we’re being perfectly honest here.

Now- would you able to get them into it as well?

Stu will ask you, with excitement reverberating throughout out his body and his voice. of course he want’s to at least try it!

so many clips in Stu’s hair. you haven’t even had that many in your hair before!

he may also wear rings sometimes. he thinks all the colors and designs are just so fun!

and on the other hand...

Billy, the guy that basically wore the same outfit for an entire movie? who’s closet only contains jeans and white t-shirts? trying out your style? i don’t think so lol

if you do- somehow- get him to try...

then you might have pressured him into it a bit? very jokingly, of course. 

“C’mon, humor me, babe. Stu’s already dressed and everything!” You try giving him puppy eyes to seal the deal.

“Fine!” Billy says, grabbing the garment and a few clips from your hands. He shuts the door too harshly behind him.

A short silence is shared, before you and Stu burst out laughing. “Do you think he’s mad at us?” You’re hardly able to get it out. Of course he was, but in his own odd way appreciated this adventure.

He comes back a moment later, his white t-shirt replaced with a pastel red one, an especially gory character printed on the front. and a red clip barely hanging on to one of the side pieces of hair in front of his face. You try to suppress a giggle at Billy’s messily put together look.

for the love of gosh- don’t actually laugh when he appears. he is very outside of his comfort zone, and he’s only doing this because he loves you and Stu, and just,, don’t add this to his list of reasons not to try new things.

whatever your reaction ends up being, you’re absolutely obligated to tell them how attractive they look in it(even Billy who looks hella dorky).

(my art)

The Lost Boys

the comparison between their dark, punk-ish style and then the sweet baby pinks and blues, and soft lavenders that adorned your form?? 

it’s just too sweet.

they are completely enamored by your style- even if certain vampires (and I’m not naming any names, but I definitely mean David) may not show his love for your look as openly

Marko- he’d get one cutesy patch for his jacket, so he has like a little piece of you everywhere he goes. also...he genuinely ended up really digging your style? but not enough to abandon his punk look completely. he is still totally dedicated to that.

the other boys will absolutely mess with him about the patch though

all in good fun!

David���s not letting you near his hair with any extra clips or accessories. 

Dwayne enjoys the quiet intimacy shared between the two of you. just sitting together, you might be styling his hair( super loose ponytail or braid- admit it, it would be so cute! and helpful so his hair isn’t always in his face!)...anyways, you’d use a colorful hair tie, and a few clips to help pin back his hair. 

he probably won’t go out with the clips in, but if it’s just the five of you at the cave? he’ll keep it in until it’s time to sleep. 

he loves seeing how happy and accomplished you look after finishing with his hair tho.

Paul is hands down the most likely to get into the whole look and go out in public with it on. 

makeup? hell yeah. it won’t be as intense as yours, and he probably only does the eyes and maybe some shine. sparkly vampire time

hair accessories? all of them

would try combining his look with yours, to have a perfect mess of it.

a light, light  blue mesh top, slightly darker blue jacket(with slight accents in pink, purple, white or black), and his usual sort of white jeans(?) would still look great with it. he’s absolutely rocking that look.

you are ecstatic to finally have someone else to share your passion with! (much harder to find similar folks when you’re a vampire,,)

Helen Lyle

she’s so used to the plain life around her, and she’d been living before you- you were such a breath of fresh air.

of course, you’re darling personality also drew her into you- but your fashion sense? it fascinated her.

she’s not trying it herself anytime soon, but she appreciates the fact that you enjoy it. 

the most she would ever try is a very natural makeup look. and a coat or two of a pastel color of her choice.

she would love watching you get ready. not so much help out though- she just likes seeing the way you approach things. how you choose to pair certain pieces with one another.

she’ll ask questions to better understand your interests! not that it’s weird or wrong that you’re into it, she’s just a very inquisitive person.

you’d wear a lot of blue though- because you know Helen likes that color.

imagine wearing coordinated looks for different events and such. so, when you go with Helen to help out with her Candyman thesis, you might wear candy-themed attire. (of course in this universe,, she wouldn’t die! so no worries of that! you get to keep you’re gf).

if you do gift her something, she keeps it on her bedside table(or dresser). so she can still admire it, and still serves a purpose. fun décor!

all around though- Helen would be very chill, but captivated, about you’re interests.

Daniel Robitaille - Candyman

 his life is so dark and gruesome, and he loves seeing you all dressed up. 

and while he’s dead- long dead- and isn’t really apart of the world in the same sense that you are- it gives him this happy sense of hope for the world.

because there’s this very small thing, that you hold close to your heart, that makes you smile.

Also!!

even if they’re apart of a super awful, traumatic, part of his past- the bees are just a part of the family now.  

so cute yellow/spring/bee themed outfits?? yes. ohh definitely, yes.

As for him dressing up? He’d feel hesitant.

he’s filled with immense joy around you, but is almost scared with someone altering part of his attire or self in any way(rooted back to, again, past stuff).

but part of loving is to take the person as a whole, bad parts, good parts- insecurities- the entire package. and trusting one another.

he has his whole faith in you not to do anything bad.

and so, it becomes a habit for the two of you to spend mornings together, chatting and getting ready. well, you’re getting ready, it’s more for the quality time together for him.

things are little different for Daniel. for many reasons. 

one, he has very short hair. so the clips don’t really work there..

two- he only has one hand, and he’s “working” a lot with the appendages he does have. rings won’t work out because they might fall off- and he’d hate to lose something of yours.

three- he’s not a big makeup fan. he’s happy enough watching you put it on.

and then for his actual attire- he needs the coat to cover his insides. it’s also, in a way, his uniform.

you’ve settled on two things.

making homemade necklaces that can easily hide under his big coat (either sweets or honey/bee themed).

and sewing little patterns on the inside of his coat. other’s wouldn’t be able to see it, but he would know it’s there.

Brahms Heelshire

imagine being super into sorta ‘sweet lolita’, pastel/soft colors, bows, the big skirts, all the sorta ruffles(?)

 and then especially if your shorter than Brahms(which is really,, not hard to do unless you’re insanely tall cause he’s,, 6 foot 3.)- and he thinks you look like such a doll? 

but like,, in a nice way. 

I think he’d get pretty excited if he got to help you set up your outfits!

especially if you praised him for picking out a good combo, or organizing correctly.

and some of Brahms movements are a bit awkward, he’s spent most of his life in the walls and the attic...but imagine turning on his music, and just dancing with him. having him twirl you in his arms a few times.

Brahms loves having your hands through his hair. and if hair accessories means he gets more of that love and attention? then yes,, yes he will wear them.

he just likes feeling taken care of, and along with your usual duties, you help him figure out the soft fashion styles, and how to make it more appealing and suitable for his own tastes.

because- as you insist- you want it to be something he enjoys just because he does, and not just for the closeness. though you can’t deny you love that aspect, too.

i can tell you one thing right here, though. you’re never getting makeup on him. he does not like taking off his mask, even if you’ve been in a relationship with him for a while, he still hides his face a lot.

you’d offered to do his makeup once, since he was staring so intently as you did yours. you’d made the mistake of reaching for his mask. you’d usually ask before doing so, but sometimes you’d slip up.

You apologize profusely, offering your arms out to him for a hug. “There, there, Brahms.” You smile, giving him a slight squeeze of affection. 

he does take your stuff sometimes. 

it’s a little annoying when you think you’ve lost your favorite accessory or dress or etc and then you just realize,, oh, it’s my favorite wall boy again. thank gosh you love him, so you’re not really upset or anything.

he just likes having little reminders of you, it gives him reassurance. upon other warm and fuzzy feelings.

if you’re able to find time in your day though, you’ll make cute little trinkets or bracelets for him. you’ll gift them or purposely leave them out for him-  so you’ll still have some of your stuff when it comes to getting ready the next day.

in short- he’d much rather look at you than partake on his own. 

Amanda Young

she’s never seen anything like this! :0

everyone she knows, herself included, tend to wear more dulled, plain clothes.

she’s immediately very intrigued by your attire...sort of want’s to try it, but is a bit self conscious and embarrassed to ask.

So!! you start out with small things, and fairly early on you both realize that she loves when you decorate her hair with accessories. 

gifting Amanda a pair of little pig clips!!

or little stud earrings- those would be fricking adorable on her!

and she’s just so happy,, wtf

you dress mostly for yourself, but the more you’re in a relationship with your gf- the more you want to dress for her as well. 

you can see this little sparkle in her eye when she sees you, and you want to keep seeing that look for as long as you can.

you slowly get her into it. your relationship and Amanda’s interest in your style just gives her so much light in an otherwise dim world.

if she did get into it, I think she’d do more creepy/cute. as a way to sort of cope with past trauma. that this sort of “bad” thing (the creepy) can still coexist with the good (the cute). she admires that quality.

just very sweet partners, who happen to love similar types of fashion 

[amyx2001]

Goliath's Requiem Asshole Trio Ships because I can

Edan x Raiden 

• Their dynamic is Stupid and Stupider. More specifically, Edan is losing braincells the longer he's around Raiden, who's been a moron since birth.

• Raiden is a total thief. He steals little trinkets he finds like pens, marbles, glitter, just about anything that's shiny and/or golden. Those things end up in Edan's possession as gifts from Raiden, and while he's gonna softly scold his boyfriend for stealing gifts for him, he's not about to just return them to their rightful owners! Nobody has to know about them!

• Raiden has actually only gotten caught once, and it wasn't even anything particularly valuable. He yoinked a doughnut that was kinda set aside in the box. Five minutes later Abrahm comes storming into his office asking about a missing boston cream filled doughnut when he sees exactly what Raiden and Edan were sharing. Bastard just about yeeted them out the door when he told them to go get him another.

• Edan tends to sneak into the schedule files and change up the patrol a little just so he can go on patrol with Raiden. So long as he doesn't leave any evidence, nobody can prove he did anything! Dovahcom knows exactly what he's doing but never says anything because he wants to see how long it'll take Abrahm to notice they've been scheduled to patrol together every day for the past several months. He still hasn't gotten it.

• Raiden is the kind of guy who would ramp a monster truck off a giant pile of dirt, and go sailing over several houses as he plays that little American idiot horn thing. Yk the BEE BER BRR BRR BRR BRR BER BER BEE BEE BER that thing. Edan is the guy wheezing with laughter while bolting after the monster truck to make sure he's okay. Yes this has, in fact, happened. Raiden was okay but the scolding he got from Abrahm was pretty bad.

•Idk why but I feel like Raiden orders the most over the top weird coffee at Starbucks that just doesn't surprise the barista much, meanwhile Edan just orders a normal black coffee with a blueberry shot and that's what completely confuses the barista because of how simple yet absurd it is.

• They both tend to be tasked with patrolling the facility where Doctor Trayte works, and Goliath is being held. Their two favorite pastimes are annoying the shit out of poor Goliath, and hiding tiny chicken toy things all around the lab. It's kind of a challenge to keep a straight face when they're patrolling the hallways and they can hear "WHY THE SHIT IS THERE A CHICKEN IN MY COFFEE CUP?!?!?!" from across the entire floor.

• Sometimes they'll watch Mal's experiments, be they on perfecting a new battery for the Biotides, or trying to rip the Iris from Goliath's skull with a goddamn drill. Edan keeps suggesting he use a bonesaw, Raiden goes "Try sticking a box firework in his skull, I wanna see what happens."

• They're evil little gay henchmen, I adore them. Solid 8.6/10

Mal x Edan 

• Mal is kinda not fond of most of the Smyths, but Edan? Honestly this little golden boy is cute and he doesn't mind having him around. His blue friend is another story.

• Meanwhile Edan is having gay awakening panic because the evil stoic hot scientist is flirting with him??? Is it genuine??? Is it a joke??? What do????? Raiden's just standing there like "FLIRT BACK. FOR GOD'S SAKE FLIRT BACK. EITHER IT'LL THROW HIM OFF ENOUGH FOR HIM TO STOP MESSING WITH YOU OR YOU'LL HAVE THE SEXY MURDEROUS SCIENCE MAN AS YOUR MAN."

• Finally Edan does flirt back and Mal absolutely wasn't expecting that. But it's a welcome surprise, and he asks Edan to join him for coffee. They've been together ever since.

• Every time a Smyth walks past Goliath's cell, one of his ether snakes hisses to scare them off. If it's Edan specifically, Mal starts hitting the button to electrocute Goliath and his snakes, going "FUCK OFF DON'T YOU HISS AT HIM HE'S MINE"

• Edan is the only person keeping Mal sane enough to not go buy a hundred different bottles of liquor and set up a whole bar in his lab. Edan is also the only reason he wants to set up a full liquor bar in the first place.

• Mal has everyone who's a lower rank than him and/or afraid of him refer to him strictly as Doctor Trayte, except Edan. Edan has the boyfriend privilege.

• Edan keeps volunteering to be the Smyth patrolling Mal's lab. Since all the others don't want to, Dovahcom lets him. He also keeps sending Raiden with him because Raiden wants to go so he gets an excuse to chill with his bestie and see him happily talking to Mal about the chemistry books he's been studying.

• Edan is generally the one who reminds Mal to take care of himself, and when they get off work he takes Mal to dinner at this nice little family diner. They may also go to the bar. And then the ice cream parlor. And then Mal's house. I can neither confirm nor deny.

• Mal runs off of coffee, he's engineered himself a stupidly strong blend and he drinks at least seven or eight mugs of it a day. Edan, meanwhile, doesn't drink more than a cup a day, and whenever Mal works late, he ends up with a precious, curly black and gold haired Smyth taking a nap with his head on Mal's shoulder. The scientist never wakes him, he just lets him sleep and runs his fingers through Edan's hair.

• Suave Science Bitch and Little Anxious Smyth, with the mandatory Dumbfuck Wingman Bestie. Very cute, 8/10

Mal x Edan x Raiden 

• Ough polycule of evil,, yems.

• Mal constantly has to deal with these idiotic Smyths keeping the hallways of his lab safe. He hates them. They talk too much. They're clingy and annoying. Neither one of them is remotely intelligent. If they stopped being tasked with patrolling his facility he could actually get some work done.

• ^ He thinks, as he holds Raiden's hand and chats with both him and Edan about the project he's working on, knowing full well that they're so cute and so smart and that if anyone so much as looked at them wrong, Mal would make sure they end up as his next science experiment. He knows that Edan and Raiden's job can be dangerous and he's not about to lose his boyfriends.

• Raiden is the one who brings the other two along for the daily coffee run, Mal goes out and gets the three lunch, and Edan takes his soulmates out to dinner. Two blocks from Edan's house is a cute little cafe and sometimes(read: all the time) he stops there to get something like doughnuts or scones or cookies or something for the other two.

• Raiden is constantly spoiling Edan and Mal with gifts, be they little trinkets, something useful, a huge amazing gift, and one time he actually took down a Biotide and brought it to Mal because he overheard Mal saying that he'd love to pick one apart. Let's just say Abrahm wasn't happy.

• Mal is the keeper of the sacred braincell, Edan is trying to get himself a braincell, and Raiden keeps lighting his last remaining braincell on fire.

• They have "WE ARE GOING TO BEAT YOU TO DEATH" ship energy. Goliath lives in constant fear of all three of them.

• Cuddle piles and nap piles on the couch are mandatory, as well as matching pajamas and saturday movie nights with spicy cheetos(for Edan), butterfingers(for Raiden), marshmallows(for Mal), and chocolate drizzled caramel popcorn(for all of them). They rotate who gets to pick what movie. Edan's got a bit of a liking for superhero films, Raiden likes awful horror movies and slashers, and Mal surprisingly likes cheesy romcoms.

• Abrahm always asks why Mal's lab reports are late, and every time he gets a response of Mal pointing at Edan and Raiden, who are both pointing at him and each other. Abe still hasn't figured out that they're dating and it's driving Dovahcom insane.

• Sometimes Edan brings his roller skates and goes skating around the lab. Raiden can't skate, but Edan gives him piggyback rides so he can enjoy it too. Mal has no interest in skating, but it's kinda mesmerizing and incredibly precious to see Edan just zipping around on wheels, having a little fun, especially when Raiden's with him. One time Abrahm opened the door as Edan was skating over to it and he accidentally kicked Abe in the head out of sheer panic. Raiden helped console the poor guy while Mal performed a quick lobotomy so Edan wouldn't get in trouble.

• They're a polycule of bastards. Bastard times 3. Bastard cubed. I love em. 10/10

BONUS 

Mal x Abrahm

• Oh, evil science dictator and his evil scientist henchman? Hell yes. Evil science dictator and his evil scientist henchman dating? Hell yes!!!

• Mal is a distinguished gay. Abrahm is a disaster bi. Do the math. Abrahm is constantly blushing at least a little and Mal is constantly flirting with him at least a little. It's like a positive feedback of Mal flirting with Abe, who gets red in the face, which prompts the warden to fluster him more, which makes this todoroki haired dipshit even redder, and so on and so forth until Goliath gets sick of it and yells at them to just get a room. This generally leads to Abrahm practically breaking down the cell door and throwing him at a wall before locking him in again. And then he kisses Mal right on the lips. And just to spite poor Goliath the end up making out literally right outside his cell.

• Abrahm tends to have Mal summoned to his office just to treat him to dinner/coffee/dessert/cuddles/ect. Mal often gives him a halfhearted grumble of "I have work I need to do." and Abrahm just shoots back with something like "As your supreme overlord and employer, I hereby relieve you of your duties for a while. Checkmate."

• Abrahm and Mal like to dance together, usually in the comfortable privacy of Abrahm's personal lounge. Usually they'll end up doing a dramatic tango, and Mal always dips Abrahm at least once, it's the dictator's fatal weakness, but if one of them isn't feeling up for something that fast paced and skilled, they'll just softly waltz together. And give each other soft little kisses. And compliments and words of affirmation, and praise. Lots of praise.

• Many times, Abrahm has forgotten that he can get drunk off of chocolate flavored liquor. Many times, Mal has found Abrahm crying, face down, on the couch in his room, mumbling incoherently in a drunken stupor with an empty bottle of 360 double chocolate flavored vodka falling out of his hand. Many times, Mal has gotten Abrahm to drink some water and then cuddled him for the rest of the night to comfort his distraught, horribly drunk boyfriend.

• Mal doesn't know vines. He doesn't know internet culture in general. Abrahm? Abrahm is quoting iconic vines constantly. You could be one of the lucky(or unlucky) bastards to hear Mal shout "WHY WOULD YOU PUT BARBEQUE SAUCE THERE?!?!" from Abrahm's office and double over wheezing and laughing.

• In this AU Abrahm is smaller than Mal. Mal still uses him as a pillow because his little red and white haired sweetheart is so soft and warm. Abrahm doesn't mind, he gets a free weighted blanket and lots of cuddles.

• Sometimes they make a date out of torturing and experimenting on Goliath, because they're soft and in love but they're still incredibly messed up.

• Evil Assholes Fall In Love, Become Even More Evil, More At 11. They have a Chemistry of Pure Nastiness and I adore them, 12/10

((There we go, that's all of them for the asshole trio!! You uh. may have to put this under a cut because it's long, but that's up to you ^^")) -Z

[kjhmyg]

rough edges pt. 4 (m)

pairing: jungkook | (f) reader genre: college!au, badboy!jk warnings: mentions of drugs, implied sex word count: 11K

1 / 2 / 3 / Part 4 / 5

author’s note: no smut in this chapter folks, but i’m posting the next one real soon and you better hold on to your panties for that one. i wanted to show more of jungkook’s pov in this one. enjoy! 

Jungkook makes a bee line in the direction of the toilets. He turns the corner at the far end of the dance floor and enters a long corridor. He turns right in the direction of the men’s room, then stops halfway, leaning against the wall that separates the area from the dance floor. The music isn’t as loud here and he sighs, being able to hear his own thoughts for the first time tonight. A couple of other club goers walk past him. He waits for them to be out of sight before digging into the inner pocket of his jacket, taking out his phone. Swiping the screen, he finds multiple notifications of text messages from you. He’s smiling before he even opens them. 

They’re mostly pictures of you, back home, where you’re spending Christmas and New Year’s. You’ll only be back in two weeks and he’s counting down the days till then. When you mentioned going home for the holidays, he looked a little down. Not because he didn’t want you to be with family, but because he didn’t want to be without you. You had asked if he wanted to come home with you, but then you both decided it might be a little too early for that. Also, he’s deathly afraid of your dad after hearing how much of a perfectionist the man is. But not wanting him to feel lonely, you promised to send him photos whenever you can. 

“I’ll be fine.” He says, tightening the scarf wrapped around your neck. “Besides, Jimin and a few of the guys are gonna be around. I won’t be alone.”

“Alright.” You pout, asking for a kiss. “I’ll miss you.” 

The train horn sounds, signalling that it’s about to depart soon. Both of you look in the direction of the train where other commuters are hurrying aboard. “I’ll miss you too, baby. Take care and call me when you get there.”

“I will. I’ll send you lots of pics.” You nod, smiling. You were so excited to go back home but now, having to leave Jungkook behind has you questioning whether you really have to go. “Stay out of trouble, okay?”

He chuckles, kissing your forehead. “I’ll try.”

"See you next year then." You say, lifting your bag over your shoulder. You're sad about having to leave him behind. "Merry Christmas. And happy new year." 

"Okay come on Santa, you're gonna miss your train if you don't get on now." 

You giggle as he directs you to the train car door. "One more thing." He tilts his head and grins when you stop yourself from getting on the train, and turn to face him instead. You're so stubborn.

"What is it?" 

"I love you." 

You're still so shy about saying it so openly. He grabs your face and kisses you deeply. "I love you too." 

The platform guard starts whistling and you hurry up the train. Jungkook bites his lip at how cute you are, then there’s a sinking feeling in his heart. He doesn’t like seeing you go, even if it’s just for a couple of weeks. But he’d rather not show it to you, because he knows you’d feel bad about it. You rush to your seat and wave to him from the window. He watches from the platform as your train departs, and until he can no longer see you. 

He scrolls through the photos you send, noting the family members and friends in some of them but honestly, his eyes only look for you. The scrolling stops when he lands on a photo of you in a dressing room, trying on a light blue dress. It hugs your figure nicely. Too nicely. You definitely know what you’re doing sending him that photo. Oh the things he would do to you if you were standing in front of him right now in that dress. 

He closes the chat and clicks on a private folder in his gallery. His tongue comes out to wet his lips and he gulps, suddenly feeling very thirsty as he looks through the photos and videos he has of you. Specifically, a video you sent last night, where you’re laying in bed in your nightgown. Only showing from the neck down at first, the camera then pans to where you’re lifting the fabric up to reveal your bare body underneath. Your hands trace your skin from the top of your chest all the way down, and your fingers find their way to your⎯

“Damn. Does she have a sister?”

Jungkook jolts from his position, pressing the phone to his chest. The other guy chuckles, crossing his arms and leans against the wall, facing Jungkook.

“What the fuck. “ Jungkook breathes, positive he’s just had a heart attack. He looks to the side where Suga stands all smug. “Are you trying to kill me? How long have you been standing here?”

“Long enough.” He winks and Jungkook groans. Jungkook locks his phone and shoves it safely back into the pocket it came from. Suga continues to observe Jungkook. How he gets all clammy when the topic of you comes up. Jungkook should know better than to try and keep secrets from him. “You know you shouldn’t have your personal phone on during work. Much less use it.”

“I know I just...nevermind.” 

“It’s that girl, isn’t it?” He smiles his signature gummy smile. “Y/N?” 

Jungkook scoffs way too quickly, only confirming Suga’s theory. He raises a brow at Jungkook, who shakes his head and walks off, back towards the main area of the club. He rests against the bar and orders an iced tea without thinking much of it. When Suga joins him, he frowns. “What now?” Jungkook asks, noticing his expression.

“Iced tea?” Suga nods towards the drink and Jungkook blinks, looking at it. “Why are you drinking iced tea?” 

Jungkook can’t admit it’s because iced tea is your regular order when you eat out, and it kind of grew on him. He pushes the drink away. “It’s...refreshing?” 

Suga laughs, then motions for Jungkook to follow him. They walk past the crowd of people, towards the back exit where security guards the door; one on the inside and one outside. They exchange nods, stepping out into the back alley to find a quiet space, away from listening ears. They lean against a fence wall separating the club ground from a more sophisticated version next door; a gentlemen’s club which they’ve only been to once. It’s a huge contrast. Same type of business just different target audience. 

“I’m not stupid.” Suga takes a box of cigarettes out of his pocket and lights one up. “She’s more than a friend, isn’t she?” 

“Who?” 

“Drop the act.” He rolls his eyes with a shake of his head. 

Jungkook drops his head into his hands and groans. Amused by his younger brother, Suga chuckles, ruffling Jungkook’s hair. It’s been a while since he’s seen Jungkook this vulnerable and he’s enjoying it.

It’s been almost two months since the night Suga and you met. Although Jungkook tried his best to redirect the conversation every time a question was sent your way, at the very least, you had given Suga your name. Would’ve been impolite not to, anyway. Suga put two and two together. It became all the more apparent to him why he’s been seeing less and less of Jungkook at work, why he never stays longer than he needs to anymore, and why the car always smells like sex.

“You’re not as slick as you think you are. I’m disappointed.” 

Jungkook sighs, then looks at him as he takes a slow, long draw of the cigarette. "Sorry. I know I shouldn't get myself attached to a girl especiall⎯"

"No, not that." Suga smiles. He lowers his voice, "We work with drugs, among other things, so keeping secrets should be your forte. Yet, I find you in a corner, jacking off to a video of your girl." 

"I was not⎯" Jungkook pinches the bridge of his nose. "I was just...relieving some tension."

“Right.” Suga throws his half-used cigarette on the ground and steps on it. He crosses his arms across his chest and expression turns serious. Jungkook knows that look. It means he’s thinking over something important. He waits patiently for the older guy to speak. “Listen. Don’t think the others haven’t noticed how distant you’ve been. They don’t know about Y/N yet. You’ve got to be more careful.

“I”ve been covering for you. I told Captain and Lieutenant that your university’s keeping a close eye on you. So you had to lay low. I’m just telling you this so our stories check out. The boss is here. Big boss. And he’s called for us to see him in a bit.”

“What, why? Shit, are we in trouble? This is all my fault.” Jungkook fidgets in his spot. The boss seldom makes an appearance. There’s usually an underboss who passes the necessary information to their captain or lieutenant, who then passes it to them. 

"Calm down." Suga frowns. "Since when do you get nervous? You better get yourself together. He's expecting us right about now. Come on, Ace." 

Jungkook straightens himself up. Suga walks ahead, back to the club and before Jungkook trails behind, he’s grabbing for his phone again. But this time to switch it off. He doesn’t usually have it on, but he misses you. And waiting till after every shift to be able to see you is torture. Now that it’s off, he can focus. He has to. Suga stops by the door, waiting for him to catch up and they head up to the second floor of the building, down narrow corridors before reaching a room guarded by two of their colleagues. They greet each other and one of the two opens the door for them. 

It leads them to a room with a gambling table in the middle. Everyone at the table is serious, silently observing their opponents. Inside, there are four other guards, one by the door, one by the table, and two standing in front of a second door to the back of the room where they’re headed. All of them armed. The two walk quietly across the room and wait as the guards make their presence known to the boss. It’s a makeshift office, where Mr. Kim waits for them. They enter once they hear him call out for them. 

“Sit down.” He says as soon as they step inside. The lieutenant, who was sitting on the other side of the table across from Kim, gets up and smiles at them as he takes his leave. At the very least they know it won’t be bad news if he’s not leaving the room looking sullen. They take their seats and wait for instructions. 

Contrary to what anyone would expect the boss to look like, he has a kind face. Like someone you’d see in the supermarket grocery shopping for his kids, which makes it easy to get comfortable. That is, until he gets angry. Neither of them have experienced it personally, yet. And they hope not to after all they’ve heard about him. He’s not the boss for nothing. 

He gets right down to business with the boys, sliding a tablet across the desk towards them. On the screen, there’s a picture of a vacated building. It looks similar to the one they’re in. 

“This is…?” Suga asks.

“A new location.” Kim replies, a smile on his face. “Abandoned a few years ago after it caught fire. Pretty damaged but we’ve got men working on it already. It’ll look good when it’s done in about a month.” 

Jungkook notices the address at the bottom of the photo. He thinks about it for a while before realising he knows where this is. “Wait. This is in our district.”

Kim smiles and nods. “It is.” 

Jungkook glances at Suga and shifts uncomfortably in his seat. Suga sends him a look that tells him to keep cool. “Sir, is there a reason you’re setting up the new location in my area? I mean, based on my numbers, I think I’ve been pretty consistent in my dealings⎯”

“Calm down.” He chuckles, leaning back into his chair. “Always so serious. No wonder you’re so good at what you do. But no, we’re expanding because business is good. Especially in your district. Stressed college kids who need help winding down, looking for some fun. We’re just bringing the party to them. It’ll make things easier for you.” 

“But boss, the cops are gonna be all over the place.” Suga says. “We definitely can’t move as freely there, like we do here. One slip up and it’s over.” 

“So don’t slip up.” He says casually, then laughs. “But ah, you’re right. So maybe until we’re clear, we don’t move the drugs there. Let the cops see it’s just another nightclub. Till then, you can continue pushing the drugs as you normally do. Then once we’re clear, we open up business. I’m sure you can figure out the timing, I’ll leave that to you.”

The boys nod. Jungkook sees the appeal, it’ll definitely be easier to have a base in the district itself. It would save him and Suga a lot of time than having to come down all the way to this club to get supplies. 

“So who’s the lead on this? The Captain?” Suga asks.

“Didn’t you hear me?” Kim says. “I’m leaving it to you. Both of you will oversee the entire movement there.”

“Us?” Jungkook and Suga speak in unison. 

“Yup.” He nods, taking back the tablet. “I’ve been hearing good things about the two of you. If you’re as good as they say, then maybe...you don’t need to answer to anyone anymore.”

“Wait, what are you saying?” 

“You two will manage the place. And…” Kim smiles, taking out a black notebook from his drawer and starts to write. “At the same time, you’ll be training some new members. This is supposed to be the Lieutenant’s job but I want you two to have a go at it. The new soldiers will then take over your place in a few years because by then, after Ace is done with college or whatever, you won’t be pushers anymore. I’ll want you on the team. Maybe a captain. Or co-captains. We’ll see.” 

Suga and Jungkook look at each other, then back at Kim. There's an obvious glee on Suga’s part. In this business, the only way is up. They don’t take their instructions straight from Kim, there’s usually a captain giving them the orders. But now they’re getting a chance to be captains themselves. Jungkook remains poker-faced as he usually does. On the inside though, he’s a little conflicted. Suga’s happy, is he supposed to be happy too? He thinks about you. Would you be happy? 

The boss clears his throat, snapping Jungkook out of his thoughts. He reaches under the desk for a small black briefcase and places it nicely on the table. It unlocks with a click and inside, stacks of money which he’s grabbing by the bundle. He starts counting and places five grand in hundred dollar bills on the table, in front of each boy. The two of them remain seated, looking at the money in front of them. Jungkook looks to Suga quizzically.

“Sir, what’s this for?” Suga asks, attempting to sound casual. “We got our pay from the captain two weeks ago.”

"Just a little Christmas gift from me." He winks.

Again, Jungkook waits for Suga to move before he does, only reaches for the money when the older boy does. He folds the stack in half and keeps it safe in his jacket pocket. 

“One more thing.” Kim says just as they start to get up. “I need you to track someone down.” He slides the tablet back to them, this time there’s a photo of a man on the screen. “This is Jax. He owes me money and unfortunately, he’s been avoiding us and our men. There’s word he’s hiding out in your district. See if you can find him and bring him to me.”

They nod and excuse themselves. But before Jungkook steps out of the room, the old man calls out to him again. “I hear you’re having some trouble with your school. Did someone rat you out?”

“Oh.” Jungkook gulps. “No, nothing like that. Just word of mouth maybe. But don’t worry, I’ve been keeping a low profile.” 

“Good. If anyone gives you trouble, just take them out.” He says casually, not even looking at Jungkook anymore. “And if you need any backup, let your captain know. Tell him you’ve got orders from me.” 

“Right. I will.” Jungkook nods with a half-smile. “Thanks boss.” 

Jungkook speed walks out the room, past the gambling table and finds Suga by the door, making small talk with the guards. They walk back down and Jungkook checks the time; a little after three in the morning. The club closes in a few hours, staying open just a little longer during the holidays. The crowd is already starting to wind down, though the music keeps blasting. 

“What’s the matter? Bedtime already?” Suga chuckles, speaking over the music. 

“I’m tired.” Jungkook says. “Aren’t you going home?” 

“Home?” Suga scoffs. “Haven’t had that in a long time.” 

Jungkook looks away, sharing the same thought. He just hadn’t realised how he’s started calling the frat house and you, as home. He fist bumps the older boy, then takes his leave, riding home in the early morning on his bike.

𝄖

“Are you awake?” You ask over the phone. It’s early, but the only time you’re able to have a decent conversation with Jungkook, in the privacy of your room and away from the prying ears of your grandmother.

“Now I am.” He hums, still sleepy. He stirred from his sleep as his ringtone goes off from your call, about to switch it off, until he sees your name across the display. “It’s okay, I wanted to hear your voice anyway.” 

“I miss you.” You say.

“I miss you too.” He smiles, leaning against the wooden headboard. It presses against his back uncomfortably but it doesn’t bother him, not when he’s busy pressing the phone closer to his ear, listening to the sound of you giggling on the other end. “Feels weird when you’re not just a drive away.”

“Well, now you know how I feel when you disappear for days on end.”

“Hey,” he pouts, “I thought we’re way past that.” 

“I know,” you laugh, “I’m just messing with you.” 

Jungkook laughs along dryly. It brings him back to what happened at work and what Mr. Kim said. He wonders what you would say if he tells you he’s about to get a promotion. It’s weird; before you, he wouldn’t think twice about anything related to work. Probably would be ecstatic at the thought of moving up the ranks. But now, he wonders if that’s really what he wants.

As much as he hates to admit it, what Hoseok said before is probably true; you’re not going to want to deal with this forever. And you’re definitely not worth losing. You sense that something’s bothering him and after a long pause, you ask him, “Everything alright?” 

“Everything is...normal.” He nods, even though you can’t see him. You only hum in response, hoping he’ll tell you when he’s ready. “I’ll tell you when you’re back.” 

“Alright.” You say. “Hey, can we facetime?” 

“Sure.”

You click on the option and wait for the screen display. When he finally comes on screen, you almost throw your phone across the room. How does he manage to look that good when he just woke up? Ridiculous. But he’s thinking the same about you, the way you’re glowing, like an actual angel. “God I miss your face.” He breathes.

“Life is so unfair.” You pout and he’s confused. “You wake up looking like that? Come on.”

“Are you kidding me?” He scoffs. “Have you seen the way you wake up from a nap with drool on your face? I can’t beat that.”  

“Shut the fuck up.” You hiss, not wanting anyone to hear you. “That was one time! And I was really tired.”

You both start laughing and it slowly dies down to you just staring at each other. Jungkook runs a hand into his hair and leans his head against the wall, watching you like he’s trying to memorise everything. You heat up a little under his stare. How do the butterflies still not go away after so long? “Hey Jungkook, merry christmas.”

“Oh, right. Merry Christmas to you too.” Jungkook smiles fondly, trying to ignore the squeezing sensation in his chest. It’s sad, but he thinks this might be the first time someone’s wished him a merry christmas. He’s not usually around for the holidays, so it’s not anyone’s fault. And it’s not like they’re gonna start singing carols and having christmas dinners at the club. Then he clears his throat, interrupting his own thoughts. “So, you must be pretty busy there?” 

“Kind of.” You shrug. “Just decorating the house, getting ready for the Christmas dinner tonight. My dad’s pretty stressed about that. He likes everything to be perfect.”

“I can tell.” He agrees and you tilt your head asking how. “Cause you’re perfect.” 

You can’t help the smile that forces its way onto your face, looking down to avoid eye contact out of embarrassment. There’s nothing that Jungkook likes more than to watch you react so adorably to his words. He could watch you forever, but then you hear footsteps moving about outside and your expression changes. You haven’t told anyone about Jungkook yet, so you’d rather they not hear you. You lower your voice when you speak, “I think I have to go now.” 

“Oh, alright.” Jungkook nods, though he looks obviously disappointed from such a short time with you. “Call me when you can.” 

“I will. Bye Jungkook.” 

You hang up quickly after he says goodbye. It leaves him feeling empty, suddenly aware of how quiet it is. There’s less of the usual ruckus around the house with most of the boys having gone home. He then wonders about how different it would be to spend Christmas with you, and your family. A sudden longing overcomes him. 

To shake it off, he decides to get up, rolling off the bed and tossing his phone back on the mattress. He’s headed for the kitchen but before going down the steps, he realises the soft music coming from Jimin’s room. He walks over and finds Jimin on his bed, singing along to the songs. His knocks on the door, startling Jimin, who smiles wide when he sees Jungkook. It’s not always that the younger guy comes to him, it’s usually the other way around. “Hey stranger.” 

“Hey.” Jungkook steps inside slowly, hands in the pockets of his shorts. “Merry christmas.”

Jimin doesn’t hide the surprise on his face. Is this what they call a Christmas miracle? “Merry Christmas to you too, buddy.” From the look on his face, Jimin thinks Jungkook might have more to say, so he pats the area on the bed next to him, but Jungkook shakes his head instead.

“Um, do you want to maybe have lunch later? Or dinner? Only if you want to.” Jungkook clears his throat, trying to ignore the awkward atmosphere. 

Jimin grins up at him. “Are you asking me out on a date?” 

Jungkook rolls his eyes and turns to leave. “Just let me know when you’re ready. I’ll drive.”

𝄖

It’s not a fancy dinner, and Jimin is fine with burgers and a shake. Jungkook had actually asked Jimin out for help on picking out a gift for you. He wanted a second opinion, since he’s never done this before and Jimin was kind enough not to give him too much shit for it. Of course, it’s not Jimin if he doesn’t drive Jungkook crazy. They spent an hour bickering because Jimin insisted on dropping by planned parenthood to get himself tested. 

“Why do you need to do this today?!” Jungkook yells in the car. 

“Because we’re already out, Jungkook!” Jimin yells back and Jungkook groans. “I need to get myself tested ASAP!”

“Why didn’t you tell me? Then I wouldn’t have asked you out!” 

“Because then you wouldn’t have asked me out!” Jimin can’t help but to let out a chuckle. “And I needed a ride.” 

“You are the most annoying person⎯”

“Oh!!! You can get yourself tested too! We can go in together!” 

“That’s it, I’m crashing this car.”

For the sake of his own sanity, Jungkook went along with him. But it was only after Jungkook threatened to tell Taehyung that Jimin had a crush on him the first time they met, that Jimin finally shut up. Only to open his mouth ten minutes later to suggest Jungkook give his test results to you as a Christmas present.

“Oh yeah,” Jimin groans, mouth full, “this is definitely better than microwaved mac and cheese. Thanks for bringing me out of the house.”

Jungkook stays quiet, eating his own burger and downing sips of soda. It’s only after a while that he speaks. “I spoke to Y/N, about her and Hoseok.” 

“And she said they’re just friends, didn’t she?” Jimin asks, nonchalant. Jungkook nods, not meeting his eyes. “Told you there’s nothing to be worried about.” 

“I guess.” He shrugs. “Can I...ask you something?”

“Go ahead.” 

Jungkook sets his burger down and takes a long sip of his drink. Jimin eyes him curiously as he does. Everything about today has been strange. Jungkook almost never spends time with anyone outside of school, and even when he does, it wouldn’t be him that makes the first move. “How do I know if whatever choice I’m making is the right one?” Jungkook continues when Jimin doesn’t respond, “Like if you have to choose between two things, how do I know if I’m choosing the right one? Assuming you can’t have both.” 

“First of all, I can’t believe you’re coming to me for advice.” Jimin says cheerfully, then gets serious again. “But okay, that’s too vague Jungkook. It really depends on the context.”

Jungkook thinks hard. He doesn’t want to let Jimin know what this is really all about. “Okay so, if you’ve always liked dogs...but now you realise cats are cute too.”

“O-kay...and you can’t have both a cat and a dog?” 

“Um,” he thinks, getting confused himself, “maybe the cat’s allergic to the dog?”

“So you want the cat?” 

“Yes. But she- it’s allergic to dogs. And I have a dog.” 

Jimin blinks. “Yeah, I can’t work with this. Do you want my help or not?”

“Okay okay,” Jungkook whines and Jimin almost snorts at his tone if not for how serious he looks, “what if all you’ve known is one thing but now you don’t think you want that anymore. You want to move in a different direction. How do I know if I’m going in the right direction?”

“You’ll just have to take the risk. Won’t know if you don’t go for it.” 

“What if I regret it?” 

Jimin stares at him for a while. “You might have regrets either way. That’s life. If you choose that one thing, you might regret not going for the other. If you choose the other, you might regret it because you miss how it was before.” 

“So, there is no right choice?”

“That depends on you. Which option would your future self’s happiness outweigh the regret? That’s the choice you go for.”

“Happiness…” Jungkook mutters to himself. What makes him happy? He wonders. But all he sees is an image of you in his head. Jimin snaps his fingers to bring him back. 

“Okay? Just do what makes you happy.” 

Jungkook nods, silently reaching for his burger again. He continues eating as if nothing happened and so does Jimin. They sit in silence for a while, save for the sound of their chewing. Then Jungkook says ever so softly, “Thanks hyung.”

𝄖

“Are you sure he’s here?” Suga sighs, asking the kid walking ahead of him. He sends a disapproving look Jungkook’s way. “The last couple of places you’ve sent us were dead leads.” 

“I think so. I...I⎯I think he’s here.” He stutters and Jungkook has to hold Suga back before the new recruit pisses himself under his death stare. It’s dark and dirty, an old apartment building with floors that feel like it might collapse at any moment with every step they take. 

Christmas and the conversation with Jimin pushed to the back of his mind, Jungkook’s back at work, trudging through this place, looking for a wanted man. Next to him, Suga’s seething, “I swear if we don’t get this guy, you⎯” He stops when Jungkook grabs his sleeve, stopping them in their tracks. 

“Will you shut up?” Jungkook growls. “You’re scaring him.” 

Suga looks offended. “I’m scaring him? Gee, sorry mom, I won’t do it again. Why don’t you ground me while you’re at it!” 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Jungkook hisses. 

Suga sighs again, running a hand through his hair, messing it up. The other guy moves ahead when Jungkook nods for him to go on. He continues to search for the right apartment, one which he was told the guy Kim is looking for can be found at. “I’m really tired and this kid is getting on my nerves.” He says, gesturing towards the guy. 

“Give him a break. He’s new, it’s not his fault he got assigned to this.” Jungkook whispers. “We’re supposed to train him, remember?” 

“I don’t give a f⎯”

“Uh...guys…” The newbie calls out. They turn in his direction and walk towards him, standing in front of an apartment. Door ajar, and a mess on the inside. The window is open, probably from leaving in a rush. Another dead end.

“Fuck.” Suga grunts, storming off in the direction they came from.

Jungkook sighs and turns to the boy. “You can go. Call me when you have new information. But check your sources first.” 

He looks at Jungkook sheepishly and mutters a soft apology as Jungkook walks away, catching up to Suga who’s already standing by the car in the back alley. “He sucks.”

“Yeah well, he’s new. And young. Give him a break.” Jungkook stares Suga down. The car door clicks as Jungkook unlocks it and they slide in.

"Hey, we started young too." Suga mumbles, then smiles as he thinks about the past. "Remember? You had such innocent eyes, fooled everyone into giving us intel for Kim. Gave us everything we need. And look at where we are now." 

"Where is that?" 

"What d'you mean?" Suga cocks a brow at Jungkook, frowns when he doesn't reply. "Did something happen?" 

"No, nothing." Jungkook sighs, shaking his head. The car's engine revs up as he turns the key on the ignition. "Just really tired." 

"Hang in there." Suga says softly, looking out the window. "If we do well managing the new club, we'll move up the ranks as captains. We won't have to do stupid runs like this anymore. I mean it's fun but it'll be even more fun getting soldiers to do the dirty work for you. Am I right?" 

"What if I don't want all that?" Jungkook asks carefully and quietly, immediately regretting it after. They've known each other for a long time; they're practically brothers. Suga knows Jungkook like the back of his hand, or at least he thinks he did. Recently though, Jungkook's been hard to read and acting differently. Suga doesn't like that.

"What the hell are you saying?" His voice is low but Jungkook can sense the frustration in it. "You don't want to be captain? Dude, what is wrong with you, you're acting so weird. Seriously. The normal you would've beaten the crap out of that newbie for leading us to three dead ends! But no, you're all soft now. Talking about giving him a chance and shit…and now you don’t even want to be captain?" 

“I⎯” Jungkook opens his mouth but can’t find the right words. He backtracks instead. “Nevermind. Just forget I said anything.”

Jungkook starts driving, heading back to Suga’s apartment to drop him off. After a long silence, Suga speaks again. “I don’t know what’s going on but I hope you don’t make any stupid decisions. Take some time to think things through. Then tell me if you’re in or out.”

Jungkook nodded even though he stopped paying attention halfway. Once he’s dropped Suga off, Jungkook takes a long drive through the night with the windows down. But the cool night breeze does little to clear his mind, so he decides to head to the gym instead. 

While he managed to get through his usual workout routine, it didn’t help him forget about what happened earlier either. He didn’t even realise a guy at the reception was speaking to him until they called out his name a couple of times. They wished him a happy new year and Jungkook returned the greeting, collecting his belongings from them. 

It’s three days into the new year so things are slowly going back to normal; students returning from their hometown. He was bummed when he got called into work on new years’ eve and had to miss out on a facetime session with you that night like he had planned. He hasn’t been home since and he sighs, feeling exhausted. Thinking about you, he takes out his personal phone and tries to switch it on, but the screen remains black. The battery’s dead. Perfect. 

He heads back to the house, driving past other greek houses hosting parties. The house is dark when he walks through the front door, save for the light coming from the television in the living room. Reruns of bad movies are playing on the television and a few guys are on the couch with drinks in their hands. Jimin, amongst them, turns his head when he notices Jungkook, then smiles. He’s drunk. He raises a finger at Jungkook and opens his mouth, then his brows crease and mouth drops into a frown. “Have to tell you something...can’t remember…”

“Cool. Goodnight.” Jungkook heads for his room, leaving him confused.

Jungkook runs up the steps but stops just as he reaches the top. There’s light coming from under his door. Had he left his lamp on before leaving a few days ago? He doesn’t think so. He walks up to it slowly and presses his ear to the door. It’s quiet. Gently, he turns the doorknob and pushes the door open. 

Are his eyes playing tricks on him? He looks around the room and sees luggage placed by the bed. They’re yours. And then there’s you, sleeping peacefully in his bed. He closes the door gently and walks over to you, kneeling by the side of the bed. It’s the first time he’s seen you in weeks. Without realising, he cups the side of your face with his palm. Your stir at his touch and he almost regrets it, if not for the cute way you pout and eyes flutter open.

“Jungkook?” You mumble, placing your hand on his.

“Hey baby.” He smiles, moving in to kiss your forehead. “What are you doing here?”

“I came back early.” You say softly. “Hana’s not home yet and I thought I’d come stay with you. I called you, but I couldn’t get through. So I came here.”

Jungkook curses himself for not charging his phone earlier. “And they just let you in?” He asks, keeping in mind the house rules in which non-members aren’t allowed in unless you’re with a member.

“I flirted with Jimin and he let me in.” 

“Sounds about right.” He chuckles. While he’d love to slide into bed with you right now, he figures he should clean up first. So he removes his hand from you and gets up, but you grab onto his arm to stop him. 

“Where are you going?” 

You’re so tired that you drift in and out of sleep. He finds it so endearing. He places your hand back gently and pulls up the covers. “I’m gonna take a shower. I’ll join you in a bit.” You hum in response. 

Jungkook’s shower is a quick one. The warm water from the shower doesn’t match up to having you snuggle up against him. He finishes quickly, dries his hair in the bathroom and practically runs back into the room, slipping under the covers with you, wrapping his arms around you. You roll over when you feel him pulling you close, resting your face in the crook of his neck, breathing in the sweet smell of his soap. 

Your legs tangle into each other’s and your arm wraps loosely around his waist as his hand rubs your back in gentle movements. For the first time in three weeks, he feels relaxed, falling asleep almost immediately.

𝄖

One day, Jungkook’s waking up in the dark of Suga’s apartment, where the paint is peeling off and it’s vacant save for the couch he sleeps on. The next, he finds himself waking up to something dreamlike; his room in a nice orange glow from the morning sun streaming in, his legs tangled into yours, and you softly tracing your finger over his skin.

A smile forms on his face and he groans sleepily. Even though he’s tired, he chooses to wake up. You feel his hand slide down your back, down to your butt where he rubs circles. You look up and see him smiling, eyes still closed. You scoot up and give him a peck on the lips and get an approving hum from him. Once you’re free from his hold, you roll off the bed to wash up. He watches under sleepy eyes as you undress, stealing glances at him when you slip out of your nightwear. 

“Missed you so much.” 

You turn, smiling. “I missed you too.” 

“Not you,” Jungkook replies, “her.”

You turn, looking around the room. He must be sleep-talking, you think. “What? Who?”

He grins, then throws the blanket off himself to sit on the edge of the bed, reaching out for you. He pulls you in and turns you around so your back faces him. His hands up both sides of your butt. “Her.”

You erupt into a fit of giggles, playfully hitting him with a pillow and he holds his hands up to defend himself. “You’re so stupid.” You laugh, ending up on top of him when he grabs you. “Missed you.”

You stare at each other for some time and he traces your bottom lip with the pad of his thumb. You can’t help but to lean in for a kiss. It starts off as gentle pecks, until he places his hand on the back of your neck and slips his tongue into the kiss. You’ve both missed this. It seems silly when he thinks about it since it’s only been a few weeks. Makes him feel guilty too; all the time he’s gone off the grid and you’ve had to put up with it.

“Mmkay, I’m gonna wash up.” You pull away too quickly but he doesn’t stop you, and his eyes don’t leave you, or your butt, as you put his oversized shirt on and head for the bathroom with your clothes and toiletries.

It’s a short shower, since you figure the rest of the guys might wake up soon. Most of them are back by now, though probably not up yet. So when you hear a knock on the bathroom door, you think it may be Jungkook. Thankfully, you had enough sense not to open the door without getting dressed first.

“Hoseok. Hi.” You try not to sound awkward. By the look on his face, he wasn’t expecting you either. “Sorry if I was taking too long...shower..” You gesture vaguely and he nods. 

He must have just gotten home, still dressed nicely but with bags under his eyes. You grab your bag of toiletries and towel before slipping out the door and heading straight for Jungkook’s room. But a hand on your elbow stops you before you can get to safety. You jump a little, surprised at the contact. “Sorry,” he says, “um, so how was your break?”

You look in the direction of Jungkook’s closed door just a few steps away, then back at Hoseok. “Good. It was nice.” You nod and he nods, shoving his hands in the pocket of his jeans. You turn to the door again. And back at Hoseok. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with talking to Hoseok. Afterall, you’ve made it clear to Jungkook that it’s just a normal friendship. But you don’t want him catching on to what really happened between Hoseok and you that evening. 

“Can we talk? Maybe in my room, just in case he hears us.” Hoseok speaks softly and gestures to his room at the end of the hallway, in the opposite direction of Jungkook’s. 

“Okay but make it quick.” You say, following behind. 

You leave the door slightly ajar, so you can keep an eye on Jungkook’s door. “Look,” Hoseok starts, “I wanted to say sorry. I shouldn’t have told you about...everything.”

You cock a brow at him. “Why?”

“I know it got you all stressed out.” He sighs. “And I feel bad.”

“I’m fine now.” It’s not entirely true but it’s not a lie either. You’re still worried about the entire thing. “Don’t worry about me, alright? I’ll figure out how to help Jungkook.”

Hoseok looks at you in surprise. “You will? So you’re going through with my plan?”

“Not really. I’m figuring things out as I go.” 

“Huh.” He blinks. “So you don’t have a plan.”

“I’m trying okay!” You hiss. “Give me some time. You can’t expect him to quit his job and turn into a missionary all in one day!”

He breaks into a tiny smile, “Your plan is to turn him into a missionary?”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” Your cheeks heat up when he holds back a laugh. Sounds from outside distract you and you look through the gap to see Jimin, entering Jungkook’s room. He makes a ruckus and you hear Jungkook telling him to get out. “Anyway, I’ll update you once I get any info. Anything from your friend?” 

“No.” Hoseok shakes his head, brows furrowed and looking worried. “He’s been really quiet as of late. Bit weird.” 

“Maybe he’s busy.” You shrug and Hoseok chews on his bottom lip. "Okay I should go." 

"Right right, you should." Hoseok rubs the side of his neck as he manages a small smile. He's acting weird. You quickly slip out of his room and head straight for Jungkook’s. Only to bump straight into Jimin who’s exiting the room in a hurry. 

“Y/N!” He breathes, hiding behind you. “Your boyfriend’s trying to kill me.”

“I’m sure he has a good reason for it.” You giggle, just as the door swings open and Jungkook sees you, then turns his attention to Jimin and lunges forward. Jimin screams but Jungkook’s only reaching for you to get you away from him. 

“Stay away, demon.” Jungkook hisses.

“What is going on….” You mutter to yourself while you hang the towel behind the door. 

They get into a scuffle as Jimin tries to enter the room again and Jungkook holds him back. It barely takes any effort on Jungkook’s part and all you hear is Jimin grunting. You sit on the bed, waiting for it to end. 

“I just⎯ need,” Jimin huffs, then kicks Jungkook in the nuts. Jungkook bends over and falls on his knees, groaning. “I’m sorry! I need to talk to Y/N!” Jimin says, taking the chance to jump over Jungkook and step inside, bending over to catch his breath.

“Oh my god,” You gasp, hands to your mouth. “Jungkook are you okay?”

“Don’t worry about him, he’s immortal.” Jimin says, stopping you from going to Jungkook. He sits you down again and pulls out a piece of folded paper from his back pocket. “I need you to look at this.” He hands you the paper and stands in front of you with hands on his hips. 

“Um? An STD test?” You ask. It’s his and you’re confused as to why he’s handing you this.

“Now that you’ve seen this and know that I’m clean, would you say it increases the chances of you going out and or, having sex with me?”

Jungkook gets up just then and goes straight for Jimin, tackling him to the ground. “How dare you.” He grunts, pinning Jimin’s arm behind his back. “She’s my girlfriend!”

“You’re hurting me!” Jimin cries. “Let me go, I’m not interested in Y/N!” 

Jungkook releases his hold, reluctantly, when you tell him to. He stands with his arms folded, watching Jimin carefully. Jimin breathes hard, holding on to his right shoulder. He glares at Jungkook from the floor and punches his thigh, only to hurt his own hand doing so. He screams when Jungkook fakes a kick.

“What are you up to?” You ask Jimin, sighing.

“I’m not trying to sleep with you.” Jimin huffs. “I just wanted to know if it’s a yes or a no.”

“Well, I honestly don’t know. It depends.” 

Jimin gasps. “On what? I don’t usually get rejected…”

“Usually?” You eye him curiously and he avoids your stare. “Ah...I see what’s happening.”

Jimin furrows his brows at you. You only smile back knowingly. It’s amusing to think about how he’s older than you but behaves so childlike sometimes. 

“You asked a girl out and she rejected you.”

He remains stoic for a beat until he can’t take the silence. “Fine, yes! She mentioned something about me being a fuckboy. So rude.” 

“She’s not wrong.” Jungkook mutters, going to sit next to you. 

“So anyway, I took the test to show her that I’m safe.” Jimin says, pouting. “But she still won’t go out with me.” 

“Maybe it’s not about that?” You shrug. “She probably just doesn’t like you. No offence.”

“That’s crazy, I’m so lovable.” 

“You’re disgusting.” Jungkook comments.

“Look, just leave her alone.” You say. “If she likes you, you’ll know.”

“But I need to know why she doesn’t like me...” He whines and you chuckle. 

“Why does it matter if she likes you or not?” You ask, eyeing him again. He fidgets under your stare. “Unless...you like her?”

“I don’t!” Jimin jumps to his feet. “I just don't understand why she would not want to hang out with me.”

You watch him with a knowing look. Jungkook furrows his brows and puts a hand up to him, “Wait. Did you take this test and force me to get it done with you, then show it to Y/N so you can get some advice, all for this girl? Wow.”

“Shut up! I hate you guys!” Jimin yells, storming off. 

Jungkook smiles, “Yeah he’s definitely into her. I know from experience.” He leans in to capture your lips in a kiss, one which you smile into. Your hands move down his bare front, teasingly tracing his abs. “Any plans today?” He asks breathily when he pulls away.

“Hm...I have a lot to unpack. Let’s go back to my place.” You smile, noting the way he pouts. “You can help me.”

“I have a better idea.” He smirks, hand around your waist as he moves back and pulls you on top of him. “We can stay in bed.” 

“Sure I guess.” You shrug. “But you know Hana’s not around right? So we have the entire place to ourselves, to do whatever we want.” You whisper the last part against his lips and he knows you’re just trying to lure him in, but he’s so weak when you use that voice on him. 

“I’ll go get ready.”

𝄖

“Why are we here again?” 

You turn and stare quizzically at your boyfriend, whose sulky face leaves you in giggles. There’s nothing more fun than watching a grumpy guy pushing a cart through the supermarket. “To get groceries, duh.”

“Why?” He frowns. 

“What do you mean why? Cause we need food. You know, to survive.” You tilt your head. “Have you never gone grocery shopping?”

“No.” He shakes his head. 

“What? Then who gets the groceries at the house?”

“I don’t know.” He blinks. “Probably everyone else.” 

“God, you are such a horrible housemate.” You mutter and he doesn’t react, suddenly wondering, who does get the groceries? 

You hear him grumble once he realises you’ve walked ahead, followed by the sound of the wheels of the cart against the floor, speeding up to catch up with you. You don’t actually need the cart, you just wanted to make him push one. It’s amusing, especially since he looks so cute doing it. 

You breeze through the supermarket, already knowing what to get since Hana and you follow a strict list of things to get. Only the necessities, to save cost. It’s only when you reach the jam and spreads aisle that you get stuck. “Hm...chunky or creamy?” You think to yourself. 

Jungkook waits patiently as you decide. He’s standing next to you with the cart in between. He stares as you tilt your head and pout a litte, then smiles at how adorable you look even when you’re just standing there. He pulls out his phone and snaps a shot of you. Just as he shoves the phone back in his pocket, you turn to him. “Chunky? Or Creamy?”

“Why not both?” He shrugs.

“Because we have a budget.” You shrug.

He sighs, then leaves his position from behind the cart to stand next to you. He looks at your two options. "Chunky."

"Hm," you pause, "I think I'll get creamy." 

Jungkook stares at you, puzzled as you reach for the jar and move around him to place it in the cart. You smile up at him innocently and get on your toes to give him a kiss. Maybe he'll forgive you this time. When you see a tiny smile forming, you skip away down the aisle and turn into the next one.  

It suddenly hits Jungkook. Would this be how it's like to have a normal life with you? Whatever normal is. He's still in the same spot thinking about how domestic this all seems, when he sees you return with a stack of tissue boxes, a grin on your face when you see him. 

"You alright?" You ask when he doesn't move or say anything. 

He manages a smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. I was just thinking." 

"About what?" 

"You." He says almost immediately. 

A shy smile makes its way onto your face and you bury your face into his chest. He chuckles and kisses the top of your head. When you pull away, you stare at him for a while, giving him a once-over. 

"I love your outfit today." 

"You chose my outfit today…" He rolls his eyes but there's still a smile on his face. 

You decided on a white sweater with blue jeans for him. He looks less intimidating and absolutely adorable when he's not decked in all black or his favourite leather jacket. It's not like you went out of your way, he already had these items sitting in his closet. 

"Come on," he says, pushing the cart and holding your hand at the same time, "let's finish up and go home." 

"Okay. Actually I think we're done." 

"No, we need one more thing." You look at the items in the cart and tally them against your list. Everything's there. Still, you follow behind as Jungkook speeds up and finally stops in front of⎯ "We need lube." He says way too loudly.

You shush and cover his mouth, looking around. "What are you so loud for?" You whisper. 

He chuckles and kisses the palm of your hand. Then he reaches for a bottle of lube, reading its description. "Look, this one has a warming effect." 

A man walks past just then and you hide your face in embarrassment. Jungkook tries to hide his smile but fails. He's obviously enjoying this. He grabs your waist and presses you against his side. "Should we get this?" He asks, winking. 

You snatch the bottle from his hand and return it to its place on the shelf, grabbing another instead. "I think," you bring your face closer to his and lick your lips, "I'd enjoy the cooling lube more. Should we try this?" You ask in a sultry voice. And he knows you're only doing this to get back at him but that voice is really getting him going. He gulps, then takes the bottle from you and places it in the cart. 

You walk ahead when he doesn't say anything else, thinking you've won. 

"Babe! They have flavoured lube!" He yells.

𝄖

"Why are your clothes so big?" He asks, unfolding a black sweater that looks oddly familiar and holds it up in front of him. When he lowers it, you're staring at him with an amused look on your face.

"That's yours, Kookie." You say. "I borrowed it."

"Oh." He scratches his head and tosses it into the pile of laundry before him, focusing on unpacking the other clothes. "Kookie?" 

You smile, separating the colours from the whites. "I like it. It's cute." 

"Just don't call me that in front of the guys, okay?" He stops unfolding. "Especially Suga."

"No promises." You shrug. "Speaking of Suga, how is he?"

Jungkook pauses for a while, then says, "He's good. Why?" 

"Just wondering." You still remember the way Jungkook held you that night you met Suga. As if he was afraid of you getting any closer to him. Even during the cab ride home, he intertwines your arms and interlaced your fingers as if you would slip away if he wasn’t holding on to you.

"I have to tell you something about Suga." He says seriously. You watch him carefully and gesture for him to go on. "It concerns you. But you have to promise you won't get mad." 

"You're making me nervous. What is it?" 

"You know that video you sent me?" He starts, eyes suddenly glazed over. "The one where you're in bed, looking like a whole meal, and you start touching yourself⎯" 

"Jungkook, focus" 

"Sorry. You're so hot. Anyway," he smiles sheepishly, "Suga may have caught me watching that video…and he may have seen everything."

"What?!" You shriek.

"You promised you wouldn't be mad!" 

"I did not!" You throw yourself at him, shoving him to the floor and placing your hands around his neck in a choke. If anything, he’s enjoying it. "You're dead to me." 

He grins, hands sliding up your thighs wrapped around his middle. "I didn't know you were into this." 

"Ugh!" You throw your hands up in the air. "That video was for your eyes only!" 

"I know!" Jungkook sighs. "But I didn't know Suga was behind me. I'm sorry baby. I didn't do it on purpose." 

You whine and let yourself drop onto him. "Were you at work? Why were you watching it at work?" 

"Because. I was at work when I saw those photos you sent me. And I missed you." 

His voice is soft and gentle. Your heart swells a little knowing he thought about you while you were away. Even at work. You lift your head up to kiss him, sighing into the kiss. "Don't do it again." You say, pointing a finger at him and he nods. You draw circles on his chest for a while, "What did Suga think about the video?" 

Jungkook looks at you, amused. "He thinks you're hot." A tiny satisfied smile forms on your lips and he chuckles. "And he's right. I've missed being with you." 

His hands roam your body, from your thighs to your chest. "Me too." You bite his bottom lip, sucking on it then press your mouth to his in a wet kiss. He moans into it, hands already digging into the flesh of your skin. Until you push yourself off him. "But as punishment, we’re not having sex tonight." 

"What, no!" He whines, shooting up from his position. You almost fall over if not for him supporting your back. "Baby…don’t do this." 

You giggle when he pouts, pinching both sides of his cheeks. He tucks a curl behind your ear and you flinch slightly when it tickles your neck. The silence that follows as you stare into each other’s eyes causes the beating of your heart to intensify. And you can feel, from your bodies pressed together, that his is the same. He’s smiling sweetly up at you, a look you wish to engrave into your mind forever. When you think about the past, you’d never imagine you’d find yourself sharing moments like this with Jungkook. He always seemed so distant and cold. Yes he was playful and still is, but you never thought you’d be able to have a relationship with him like one you have now. 

The kiss that follows is slow and gentle. His lips move so carefully against yours, as if they’re savouring every touch. There’s longing in his movements and his touch, hands holding you gently over your clothes, but you can tell he’s holding himself back.  

"I almost forgot, I have something for you." He says.

“You got me a gift?” You ask, eyes lighting up and he nods.

You move to sit on the bed as he leaves the room momentarily, fetching it from his bag outside. You're excited, legs shaking as you sit at the foot of the bed, until he's walking back into the room, hands behind his back. You let out a tiny squeal when he joins you. "What is it?" 

You can barely contain it any longer, chewing on your bottom lip and eyes trained on his hands. He chuckles when you stare at him and raise your eyebrows, gesturing him to reveal it. 

"I wanted to get you something nice." He says. Your eyes go wide when you see a box in his hands. There's no mistaking what it is, a jewellery box. "I don't know if this is your style but I hope you like it…" 

You're silent when he opens the box, revealing a lovely rose gold necklace with a sparkling red heart-shaped pendant. You're more surprised than anything. You hadn't expected him to get you such a fancy gift. Maybe it isn't a big deal to him, but it is to you. He watches you, waiting for a reaction and worries when you don't give him one. 

"Do you not like it? I can return it⎯"

"Jungkook," you say softly and gently run a finger over the necklace, "you got this for me? This is beautiful." 

"Really?" Jungkook says, relieved. "I couldn't decide on a design, so I made Jimin come along to help me." 

He removes the necklace from its box and unhooks the clasp. You turn, lifting your hair for him to put it around you. It settles nicely around your neck and you run to the mirror to have a look. It's so pretty. And probably expensive. "This must've been expensive." You look at him from the mirror. 

"Don't worry about it." He reaches for your hand when you walk back towards him. "I got a bonus at work. I was actually going to get you matching earrings. But Jimin said you would think it's too much, so I didn't. If you do want it though⎯" 

You shut him up with a kiss. "This is more than enough, Jungkook. I love it. Thank you." 

"I'm glad." He grins wide, his tiny dimple showing. 

"I actually have something for you too." You say, walking over to your luggage. You unzip a compartment and with your back to him, pull out his gift and slip it under your shirt. He watches you curiously when you walk back. 

"Great hiding place." He chuckles.

"Shut up. Listen." You sigh. "I should've gone first. My present looks really lame now compared to yours." 

"I love it already. What is it?" He grabs at your hands under the shirt and you resist, laughing. 

"Okay, okay!" You hesitate for a moment, then remove the present from underneath your shirt, holding it out in front of you. "Ta-da! I made you a sweater." 

"You made me this sweater?" He takes it from you, running his hand over the soft material. It's a blue knitted sweater that you spent hours on back home. 

"Yeah. I knitted it when I was home." You bite your lip as he looks at it in silence. "Do you like it? I'm sorry it's so lame. It's such a grandma present. As in literally my grandmother helped me with it. Maybe I should've gotten you a watch or something. It's not too late, I could run some errands and get you⎯" 

"Y/N," he says, voice low and gentle, "this is the best thing anyone has ever given me." You would think he's exaggerating except for the lack of mischief in his eyes. Only sincerity. And if you're not seeing things, maybe there's a gloss in his eyes that wasn't there before. "No one's ever made me anything before." He says softly, looking at the sweater again.

It drops to his lap when he swoops in to cup your face and kiss you. Starts off gently, but he picks up the pace. You return the kiss, trying to keep up with him. He gets up from his position to lift you up, moving further up the bed. 

He wastes no time in removing the bottom half of your clothes, throwing your pants and panties on the floor, then spreading your legs so he can take a good look. "I know you said no sex tonight. So it's okay if I don't get my orgasm but I'm about to make sure you get yours." He kisses your inner thighs, then moves dangerously close to your cunt. Before doing anything else, he moves back up to kiss you on the lips. "Do you want me to stop?" 

You shake your head and he smirks down at you before going back to his position, making himself comfortable on the bed. He shifts your thighs over his shoulder and you tremble with anticipation. "Ready for part two of your present, baby?" 

𝄖

Jungkook breathes out a sigh looking at the notifications on his phone. Missed calls and messages, mostly from Suga. He dials Suga's number and braces for the yelling he's about to receive. 

"Where the fuck are you?" Suga seethes on the other end as soon as the line clicks. Jungkook winces. His calls and messages had come in while he was in bed with you earlier and no way was he about to answer the calls while he was making you scream his name in bed. “Why didn’t you pick up my calls?”

“Relax.” Jungkook says calmly. “I was busy. What’s up?”

“Busy?” Suga scoffs. An uncomfortable silence follows before Suga speaks again. “Don’t tell me, you’re with that girl again, aren’t you?”

The lack of response on Jungkook’s part confirms it and Suga groans. He can’t understand it; the vast difference he sees in Jungkook in the last couple of months blows his mind. He’s known Jungkook since they were kids. But now, Suga feels like he doesn’t even know him, not since you came into the picture. 

“Does it matter?” Jungkook sighs. He knows it does. “What happened?”

“We got a lead and needed backup.” Suga says. 

“Did you get him?” 

“What do you think?” Suga yells over the phone. “He got away, you fucking idiot.” 

“I said I was busy, didn’t I?” Jungkook fumes, keeping his voice down so he doesn’t wake you.

“Dude, what is up with you?” Suga’s voice is calm now. It’s even more worrying when he’s not yelling. “Last night, you were talking about not wanting to be captain. Is this what it’s all about? Y/N? What exactly are you trying to do here? Get married to that bitch, have kids and live a normal life? Do you seriously think that’s gonna happen?”

“Don’t. Call her. A bitch.” Jungkook clenches his teeth, trying not to let his anger get the best of him. But he knows whatever Suga’s implying is true. Being part of the organisation they’re in makes things complicated. 

“You think you can just waltz out of this establishment without any harm coming your way? You know too much already. And you don’t think that if the guys find out about your girl, they’re gonna come after her? It’s just not realistic Jungkook.”

He steps to the door of your room, watch as you sleep soundly, blankets covering your form. 

“Look I seriously don’t give a fuck about you having a girlfriend.” Yoongi clicks his tongue. “But I’ve seen her. She’s not about this life, is she? If you think she can handle it, then hey by all means you can do whatever you want. But you can’t even pick up my calls when I need you, you’re missing work...this isn’t going to work out. You need to make a choice. Are you in, or out?” 

Jungkook steps away from the door and over to the small window in the living room, overlooking the street below. He thinks, silence on both ends of the call. 

You stir from your sleep just then, feeling warm. The heater must be up too high. You roll over to switch it off, then realise the empty spot where Jungkook's supposed to be. There's no light from under the toilet door, so you look for him outside. And you find him, standing by the window, a hand on the window pane with his forehead against it, and the other holding a phone to his ear. 

“I’ll do it.” You hear him say. You were about to go up to him, but curiosity gets the better of you and you wait for him to finish. “You can trust me.” 

It’s all he says before he exchanges greetings with the other person on the line and hangs up the phone. He sighs, dropping his arm to the side, forehead still leaning on the window pane. You go up to him before he turns and finds you standing there. He jolts in surprise when you walk up to him and wrap your warm arms around his waist. His skin feels cool, probably from standing at the window, which means he must have been there for a while. 

“What are you doing?” You mumble with your cheek pressing against his back.

“Baby, why are you up?” He asks softly, turning around to hold you. “I had to take a call. Didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Oh.” You say, looking up at him sleepily. “Do you have to go? Don’t go.” 

“I’m not going anywhere baby.” He slides the window down and lifts you up, wrapping your legs around him. He carries you back into bed and crawls in right beside you. “I’m gonna stay right here. With you.”

"Good." You hum, settling nicely in his arms. 

"I love you." He whispers into the night and it's the last thing you hear before you're drifting away into a deep sleep where you dream of him. 

[orderoftheavengers]

Wanda’s Vision 

A Mysterious Package

As if losing her true love wasn’t cruel enough, Wanda Maximoff can’t even burry him. Instead, the chunks of Vision’s broken stone body are being studied in the Alchemy Department in the Ministry of Magic, as if he’s nothing more than a crumbled statue. Fighting back tears, she picks up her scarlet broom, and heads back to Hogwarts. Since helping to save the universe again, she’s been granted the chance to return and finish her schooling, But the Ravenclaw Commonroom feels empty without is Chimera Prefect.

Wanda should be in class, but instead she drifts up to her empty dorm. There, she finds a tall, tombstone-shaped package standing in front of her blue canopy bed, covered in brown paper. Tied to it is a simple, unsigned note: Enjoy!

Curiously, she takes off the wrapping, to find a tall mirror with an elegant golden frame. The curved top of the frame is engraved with the words:  erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi

Wanda’s eyes drift down to the glass. Instead of her reflection, she sees static, like on an old Muggle TV set. Then, the static clears, to a black-and-white sitcom. The Mirror of Erised broadcasts “WandaVision,” where she sees herself and Vision living an ideal life, in a setting reminiscent of the vintage Muggle sitcoms Wanda and Pietro used to watch with their parents.

The tears finally come. In her grief, Wanda slams her fist into the glass.

A normal witch or wizard could probably not damage the Mirror of Erised, but Wanda Maximoff is no ordinary witch.

Her grief turns to shock when her fist breaks through the glass, and a hurricane-like wind begins sucking her and everything around her into the mirror…

Breakfast

Next thing they know, Wanda and Vision are in their black-and-white Commonroom, getting ready for class. They don their robes, and get their chrome-covered wands and school bags. They head for the Great Hall for breakfast, accompanied by a laugh track. Once there, they have trouble finding the Ravenclaw table, due to the fact that all of the scarves, ties and tablecloths are in grayscale.

“Well, I don’t think it’s either of those,” Vision muses, gazing at two tables locked in a violent magical food fight. The Gryffindors and Slytherins are all Greasers; their black, leather, studded robes bearing large patches of lions or snakes depending on their “gang.”

The next table they look at is filled with beatniks, sharing poetry about peace and unity. “I think that’s Hufflepuff,” Wanda says, noting the badger in the middle of the table playing bongos.

The last table is full of nerds in bowties and horn-rimmed glasses. Figuring this is their stop, Wanda and vision have a seat and begin their breakfast. They’re almost immediately interrupted by the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Agatha Harkness. Wanda is clearly her teacher’s pet, and Agatha says she can’t wait to see what Wanda is capable of on the test later today. "Is my best student gonna Ace this exam, or is that a stupid question?" Professor Harkness gives an irritating "gossipy neighbor" sort of laugh. "Remember, we're doing Patronuses!" Agatha takes out her wand and says with a smile, "Expecto Señor Scratchy! ...Oh, bowtruckles and doxies...Scratchy sit!" Agatha excuses herself, to chase her silvery rabbit Patronus, which is now wreaking havoc across the table.   Wanda smiles and nods, secretly trying to remember this exam she hasn’t studied for.

To make matters worse, the school’s Head Girl and Boy, Victoire Weasley and Teddy Lupin, have decided to join Ravenclaw for breakfast. They ask Wanda and Vision where they’re from, when they began dating, and so forth, with the pair unable to answer.

“What year are you?” Teddy presses on, adjusting his cute wolf-themed sweater. “Are you Purebloods or Muggleborn?  Did you transfer from another school?”

“Any mixed heritage?” Victoire adds.

Wanda and Vision are saved from having to answer when Teddy starts to choke on a werewolf hairball; Vision saves him, using his phasing powers. The frightening moment passes, and suddenly breakfast is over.

“Oh, look at that, it’s time for the game already!” Teddy declares. “Come on!”

Very confused, Wanda and Vision follow the crowd out of the Great Hall and outside, across the gray grass, to…

The Quidditch Pitch

As they near the Quidditch field, the roar of screaming girls makes it nearly impossible to hear each other speak.  Wanda gets out her wand to attempt an ear-plug charm, and notices it looks different than before; instead of that slick chrome covering, her wand now is covered in psychedelic flowers.

When they find their seats, they notice that many of the girls have beehive hairdos, and many people’s cloaks have claps shaped like peace symbols and Yin-Yangs. Vision and Wanda move through the Hufflepuff box, where Teddy Lupin and his comrades have apparently traded their barrettes and scarves for beads and hippie hair. Next, they find a box full of nerds, that they hope is Ravenclaw; with everything still in grayscale, the only way to be sure is to look for an eagle crest somewhere. Vision and Wanda have a seat next to a friendly new girl with a beehive hair, introducing herself as “Geraldine.”

“To be honest I don’t know if I’m in the right box either,” Geraldine reassures Wanda.

“What House are you?” Wanda asks conversationally.

Geraldine’s face falls. “I…don’t know.”

The conversation is cut short when Madam Hootch, dressed like Ed Sullivan, announces the start of the game. The Gryffindor players all have moptops, and quip each other while during the game in thick Liverpool accents. The Slytherins are a bit rougher looking. Slytherin Seeker Albus Severus Potter comments about blowing up Moaning Myrtle’s toilet, and Scorpius Malfoy boasts about snorting his father’s ashes.

The Golden Snitch, for some reason, keeps flying past Wanda and Vision’s part of the stands. And something about the Snitch looks out of place. Wanda finally stops it in midair with her telekenesis, and summons it towards her for a better look. The Golden Snitch really is gold—it’s in color!—and there’s a red symbol on it: a sword, circled by two lions and a huge elegant "G."

“I think they need that!” Geraldine quickly snatches the Snitch from Wanda and expertly chucks it back into the field, as if pitching a baseball.

The Quidditch field is starting to look different. The Quidditch balls and hoops are morphing into colorful, psychedelic cartoons. As if trying to compete with the trippy animation, Al Potter takes out his wand and starts levitating furniture, toilets and animals from the castle to come flying into the crowd. This prompts the Gryffindors to make more awful puns at each other, while trying to retrieve the Golden Snitch from Ringo's nose.

“How is anyone getting through this sober?” Professor Harkness laments over the chaos.

Wanda excuses herself and makes for one of the restrooms in the Quidditch stadium. The toilets have all been blown up by Al Potter, but she doesn’t need to “go,” she just needs to think. In the restroom, she is confronted by queen bee Dominique Weasley, who seems to be implying that Wanda is guilty of something.

“I mean you no harm,” Wanda insists.

“I don’t believe you,” the young part-Veela replies, matching Wanda’s intense stare.

That’s when both girls are interrupted by a muffled voice, apparently coming from the mirror.

Superimposed over their reflections, Wanda can just barely make out the ghostly image of a young man, and hear his distant voice calling, “Wanda, who is doing this to you?”

The eerie message repeats, and Wanda’s anxiety rises, until the glass mirror suddenly shatters, startling her and Dominique. Dominique suffers a cut to her hand, getting some crimson blood on her Gryffindor scarf.

“Gosh,” Dominique says chipperly, as if their intense conversation never happened, “At least blood stains don’t show up as much against Gryffindor colors!”

The girls return to the bleachers, to find that the game has finished. It’s unclear who won, as both teams seem to be celebrating the game in their own way.  The Gryffindors give a cute, uniformed bow, while the Slytherins enthusiastically smash their broom sticks on the ground.

By the time the crowd is leaving the stadium, everything is now in color. Teddy Lupin and Victoire Weasley have their long hippie hair flowing in bright mind green and shimmering Veela gold respectively. The flowers on Wanda’s wand are now bright shades of red and orange. But the biggest shock of all comes when she and Vision return to the Ravenclaw common room, and realize that Wanda is four months pregnant!

The moment is interrupted by a noise from outside the Commonroom. Peering into the hall, Wanda and Vision see a cloaked figure emerge from a secret passageway behind a gargoyle (shaped like a Blue Meanie). The figure turns around, and Wanda sees that sword symbol once again, on the back of his cloak.

“No,” she mutters, and with a flick of her hands, literally rewinds time.

“Congratulations!”

…says Madame Pomfrey in the Hospital Wing. “You’re having a healthy baby.”

Vision stammers, “But isn’t this happening a little…fast?”

“Oh, don’t worry about that, only Muggles stigmatize teen parents. Us wizards still live like it’s the Middle Ages, remember.”

Wanda tries delicately, “The baby having some Phoenix or Chimera heritage wouldn’t be affecting anything, would it?”

“I don’t think so. But you can check the school library for more information if you like.”

The soon-to-be teen parents decide to do just that.

Wanda and Vision enter the library to find themselves now dressed like Scooby Doo characters under their school robes, which have the cut of droop-sleeved Disco gowns.

Geraldine strides in, sporting a fro, with her Gryffindor necktie tied around her head like a scarf. Teddy Lupin and Victoire sit nearby, sporting a mint-green afro and a silverly shag respectively. Lysander and Lorcan Scammander are putting up a sign on the library wall, protesting the pollution of the Forbidden Forest. From the open window, one can see that a new Quidditch game is already afoot; the Gyffindors and Slytherins, in House-colored disco suits, violently toss flying disco balls at each other, while talking like Nick Fury.

No one besides Wanda and Vision seems to notice anything amiss. That is, until Wanda suddenly goes into labor, in the middle of the “P” isle.

Vision runs to get Madame Pomfrey, while Geraldine delivers the baby. Vision returns with the nurse just too late to see his son’s birth. This is remedied a moment later when Wanda goes into labor again! They end up with two healthy baby boys. Wanda and Vision decide to go the Weasley route, and give them simple names: Tommy and Billy.

Geraldine helps Wanda turn the trunk at the end of her dorm bed into a cradle for the twins.

“I’m a twin,” Wanda remembers. “I had a brother, named Pietro.”

Geraldine then adds slowly, “He was killed by Ultron.”

That was the wrong thing to say.

Wanda looks at her friend again, suddenly suspicious and angry. She notices suddenly that the patch on Geraldine’s robes does not depict the usual Gryffindor icon, but instead, that suspicious sword symbol. Ignoring Geraldine’s stammering pleas, Wanda sends the Gryffindor flying through the stone wall, out of the Ravenclaw commonroom.

Geraldine flies backwards down the hall, until she smashes through another stone wall.

She crashes through the wooden wall of the Quidditch pitch.

And finally, she crashes through a massive wall of glass, with a shattering sound that echoes eerily.

“Geraldine” lands on the wet grass. She pushes herself up, as Ministry wizards and witches gather around her. It is dusk, and they’re in the middle of an empty clearing in the woods. Not too far off, the Mirror of Erised magically repairs its own shattered glass.

Monica Rambeau sees the Mirror of Erised standing alone in the empty field, and it all starts coming back to her...

Here’s What Really Happened

...Monica Rambeau’s mother, Maria Rambeau, founded the Sword of Gryffindor: a division within the Ministry of Magic, tasked with threats by non-human magical beings. Monica, a recent graduate of Hogwarts, had just begun an apprenticeship under her mother, when she (Monica) was turned to ash by Thanos’s Dusting Curse.  After she “Blipped” back, and learned her mother had died in the summer she’d been gone, Monica needed work to keep her mind off of her shock and grief.

Her new mission concerned Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, which had seemingly vanished overnight—along with the lake, the Quidditch pitch, and even Hagrid’s hut. All that was left was the Mirror of Erised, standing alone in the empty field. And the Mirror seemed to be malfunctioning. Its gold frame was replaced with a chrome and neon 1950s juke-box aesthetic. It’s iconic message now glowed above the glass in the form of a cursive neon sign. All the Ministry workers strongly desired to see where Hogwarts had gone; but all anyone could see in the Mirror was static.

Jimmy Woo (a former Hufflepuff Prefect now with the Ministry) gave Monica a rundown of the situation. “The Ministry’s so desperate, they’re even bringing in a Muggle, to see if one of their ‘TV microwaves’ or something might be interfering with the Mirror’s magic.”

Dr. Darcy Lewis, one of the few Muggles allowed to not only know about the wizarding world, but work with it, finally arrived. Most of the Ministry folk scoffed at the Muggle. But after a quick examination, Darcy had an answer.

“Looks like someone or something has turned your Magic Mirror into an old TV set.”

The project’s supervisor, Director Blandonius Genericus Phucknugget, snorted. “Codswallop and hippogriff dung.  Your Muggle technology doesn’t work in areas like this, where there’s high concentrations of magic!”

“Wrong,” Darcy said, drumming her fingers on the Mirror’s neon frame. “Electricity doen’t work around magic. But you guys make cars and motorcycles fly with magic all the time. You even use cameras, for Treebeard's sake! So this TV-mirror isn’t plugged into anything, but it’s still running, probably on magic. If someone can enchant me a pair of old rabbit-ear antennae, I can probably get this show broadcasting for ya. And if one of you magic dudes can conjure me up some coffee, that’d be cool too.”

Director Phucknugget begrudgingly adhered Darcy’s request. A retired Arthur Weasley was happy to donate some parts from his Muggle collections to the cause. Within the hour, everyone was watching what seemed to be an old Muggle sitcom play out in the glass… set at Hogwarts! Jimmy and Monica soon determined that, somehow, the castle and all of its inhabitants had become trapped inside the Mirror of Erised. Since Wanda Maximoff and Vision Banner-Stark were the stars, and Vision was supposed to be dead, it stood to reason that they had something to do with it.

Monica then made a bold, and arguably stupid, move. She blasted the glass with different powerful spells, until she managed to put a crack in it…and ended up getting sucked into the show.

While Jimmy, Darcy, and the others watched Monica join the main cast, the frame around the Mirror began to change. The jukebox aesthetic was soon replaced by a psychedelic pop art motif, resembling something you’d see on an old CD cover, or a “Yellow Submarine” poster. Monica, Jimmy and Darcy tried different ways to get in touch with Wanda. They tried sending an enchanted Golden Snitch into the Mirror, containing Mad-Eye Moody’s old eye, to survey the situation. Jimmy tried a mirror-enchanting spell, to send Wanda a message. But nothing seemed to work.

By midafternoon, the frame had changed again to a banded ‘70s border with rounded edges, it’s top lettering now spelled out like the opening credits of an “exploitation movie.” And the show was now in color. Soon after that, Monica Rambeau came crashing back through the glass, knocking Darcy, Jimmy and Phucknugget into the grass.

It has all come back to her now.

Lying on the grass in her Disco robes, Monica breaths, “It’s Wanda! It’s all Wanda!”

Care of Magical Creatures

The sky above the Quidditch Pitch is the color of Floo Powder, tuned to a dead fireplace. The frame around the Mirror of Erised is clunky robotic junk, smattered with flickering neon. The castle halls have become a glittery labyrinth, and echo with David Bowie music. Goblins from Gringotts are discussing business with Headmistress McGonnagall, demanding a baby as payment if they don't get their gold.

Billy and Tommy are old enough to start their first year at Hogwarts, even as their parents are still finishing up year Five. The boys adopt a cute three-headed Cerberus puppet (yes, puppet--The "Dark Crystal" kind) that they name Sparky. Everyone now has frizzy ‘80s hair, and wizard robes now have built-in shoulder pads.  Professor Harkness continues to give Wanda top marks in Defense Against the Dark Arts, where students practice wizard duels in 80s workout gear.

Wanda finally “breaks the fourth wall” again, albeit less literally this time. Excusing herself from her family, she goes to the restroom, and looks directly into the mirror, at the Ministry wizards outside. For a few moments, they talk as if there is only glass between them.

“Is this yours” Wanda says, tossing the Golden Snitch back through the glass.

Catching the Snitch, Monica begs Wanda to listen to reason. But it’s no use.

Meanwhile Vision, is getting suspicious. He manages to free Lysander Scammander from Wanda’s control. The hysterical first-year frets that he hasn’t received an owl from his parents in what seems like ages, and that having Wanda in his head all the time is painful.

But just as Vision confronts Wanda, they get a surprising visitor: Pietro Maximoff! …or is it? Something seems off, but Wanda wants to believe it’s true.

Defense Against the Dark Arts

For their Midterm Exam in Defense Against the Dark Arts, everyone suits up. Vision dresses like a Mexican wrestler, while Wanda dons a red leotard under a red cloak and tiara.  Billy and Tommy are advancing in their magic classes with alarming speed. Pietro suspiciously looks, sounds and acts very little like the brother Wanda remembers. But how many other male part-Veelas can be out there?

Back in the real world, Monica, Jimmy and Darcy clash with Director Genericus Phucknugget. The three are eventually taken off of the project for not being big enough assholes, so they set out to break some rules. Darcy “hacks” into Phucknugget’s “files,” by which we mean, she swapped his Pensieve out with a chamber pot when he wasn’t looking. Around a camp fire in the Forbidden Forest, the trio examine the memories that their shady boss didn’t want them to see.  Turns out, he doesn’t have anyone’s best interests in mind, bar his own quest power.

Monica wants to try re-entering the Mirror, but there’s another problem.  

“You’ve gone through that class twice,” Darcy warns. “Your body is cursing with the magic of a Flaga.”

“How do you know about the Flagae?” Jimmy asks.  

“Muggles can read books too you know.” Darcy produces a copy of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scammander.

Flagae are spirits that live inside magic mirrors, often acting as familiars for witches like Snow white’s evil stepmother. Darcy theorizes Wanda and Vision’s “Mirror children,” Billy and Tommy, may in fact by Flagae. And Monica is turning into one too. If she makes a full transformation, she might never be able to leave the glass again.

But Monica stands her ground. “I won’t stop until I help Wanda.”

Back in the Mirror, Vision investigates the edges of Hogwarts' grounds. He finds both the Forbidden Forest and the train platform inaccessible, blocked by a wall of shimmering magic glass.

Outside, the Ministry wizards see Vision begin to emerge from the Mirror. He pushes painfully, with his hands pressed against the frame, but some force is holding him back. Vision himself begins to shatter, as if he’s made of glass. Darcy, who has tried sneaking back onto the project, yells at someone to help him, as a Ministry Auror holds her back.

Billy, a Legilimens like his mother, senses his father’s distress and alerts her. To save her husband, Wanda creates a powerful wind to pulling Vision back into the Mirror…and takes most of the Ministry witches and wizards with him.

Modern wizards

When the winds die down, nearly all of the Ministry wizards are now inside the Mirror, and have been recast as House Elves, Leprechauns, and decorative Cupids.  Darcy is recast as a bespeckled House Elf in a blue bellhop’s uniform.

Wanda and Vision give interviews about their ongoing life problems, to no one in particular.  Vision finds Darcy, and restores her memories and human body, though she keeps the silly suit. Darcy fills Vision in on his life before the Mirror. Yet still, he can’t remember any of it. They ponder the possibility of a Memory Charm, or the simple resurrection amnesia that often plagues newborn vampires.

Monica and Jimmy remain safe outside the Mirror of Erised, but Monica is now adamant that there’s no other way to reach Wanda and stop their evil boss.

This third push through the magic glass makes Monica feel like she's shattering. All around her are the voices of her dead mother, and her absent “Aunt Carol”—Monica’s “Erised.” The temptation to just let herself melt into the glass and give up on reality is strong. But Monica is stronger. Monica finally emerges into Erised-Hogwarts, a new being. Her eyes glowing a spectrum of colors, Monica is now like a person jacked into the Matrix; the laws of physics in the world of the Mirror no longer apply to her.

It was Agatha All Along!

It’s supper time, but Billy and Tommy still aren’t back from Defense Against the Dark Arts. Wanda heads to the classroom, to find Agatha, stroking the silvery fur of her apparently corporal Patronus.

“Where are my children?” Wanda demands.

But when she attempts magic, she fails.

“Highest marks in Defense Against the Dark Arts, but an F in Ancient Runes!” Agatha taunts. “Only the witch who casts the runes can use her magic in the area. Every first year should know that!”

Agatha then forces Wanda to join her in entering a Pensieve, filled with all of Wanda’s worst memories. Yes, Wanda is now inside a Pensieve, while inside the Mirror of Erised. Agatha wants to know what makes Wanda’s magic tick, so she can harness it for herself.

Wanda sees her entire life play out. She and Pietro are children, living in their magically-hidden hole-in-the-wall apartment in Sokovia. Their father tries to make a living by magically burning vintage Muggle sitcoms into wizarding photos and paintings, that will play out the episodes, which he sells to wizard and witches that are Muggle enthusiasts. Then their home is destroyed, and their parents are killed.

Wanda sees herself in the dungeons of Durmstrang, approaching the glowing cauldron, and listening to her instructors tell her how to enter the experiment. She dips into the glowing cauldron like a bathtub, with the Mind Stone shining from the bottom like a light in a jacuzzi, clutching her phoenix-feather wand. There's an explosion of light, as she and her wand are fused together. And the premonition she sees of herself, as one of the most powerful witches alive... “There’s an entire Prophecy about you, in the Department of Ministries. Well, not anymore,” Agatha smirks, showing Wanda the ancient book she (Agatha) has stolen from the Ministry of Magic. "You're the Scarlet Witch!" She sees everything, from the death of her brother to the death of her lover. Finally, she sees and remembers how she ended up inside the Mirror of Erised, accidently sucking the entire castle in and casting a memory charm on everyone, including herself. And how from her emotions and memories, she accidently created a Flaga, in the form of her dead lover, Vision.

Wanda now realizes what she must do. It will be agony for her; but she cannot continue to imprison and torment her peers, just to keep her fantasy in the Mirror of Erised alive. And Agatha must be stopped.

The Darkest of Magic

The two witches start to duke it out in the sky above Hogwarts Castle, in a wandless witch's duel. Both conjure their Patronuses, straight from their hands. Señor Scratchy goes "Watership Down" on Wanda's firefinch, which retaliates in Hitchcock fashion. The corrupt Ministry wizard and his cronies make a bad situation worse, when they send their own twisted creation into the Mirror—the real body of Vision, now an unpainted white gargoyle, bent only on destroying its counterpart inside. But Erised-Vision knows that the best way to distract himself has always been philosophy, so he wins over his alter-ego with a lecture on the Ship of Theseus, some musings about the workings of Time Turners, and the parallels between Nargles and imaginary numbers.

Monica frees “Pietro” from the Imperius curse that Agatha has paced on him, and watches the Polyjuice Potion she forced him to drink wear off. Turns out, he’s just a Muggle named Ralph Boner.

Everything is going to chaos inside the Mirror of Erised (except for the two Visions, who are having a quiet discussion about the reliability of Divination, in midair in the Library). Wanda uses her recent lesson in Ancient Runes to incapacitate Agatha, and then dives into the older witch’s mind...

...Agatha is centuries old. Haling from the Salem Witch’s Institute, she was shunned by her Coven, and even her own mother, for “studying the Darkest of Magic.” Agatha then unleashed a Killing Curse on all of them. Once the heinous crime was done, Agatha’s Horcrux was made. She plucked the pendant off of her mother’s body, and pined it to her own cloak.

Agatha is brought back to the present, just in time to see Wanda’s firefinch devour Señor Scratchy. The scarlet magic shooting from Wanda’s hand briefly flashes bright green.

Goodbyes

Hogwarts has been restored. Everyone is free from the Mirror, save three people: Vision, Billy, and Tommy. Agatha lies dead on the grass outside the Mirror of Erised—or at least, her human body does.  Using her powerful Scarlet Magic, Wanda fuses the pendant Horcrux into the golden frame of the Mirror of Erised, trapping what’s left of Agatha. From now on, Agatha can only exist in the role of other people’s fantasies, when they look into the Mirror. “No one will ever bother you here,” Wanda assures her enemy, through the glass.

Oblivious, the fraction left of Agatha’s soul smiles from behind the glass, in her 1950s getup. “Fabulous! See you in class, Sugar!”

Wanda apologizes to Monica, and all of her peers from Hogwarts, while Director Phucknugget is hauled off to Azkaban by the Dementors.

Headmistress McGonnagall assures Wanda that she is still welcome at Hogwarts, provided more precautions are taken with her powers. But Wanda chooses to leave the school.  Before leaving the castle, Wanda pays her family one last visit.  The Mirror of Erised stands in a large empty room. Separated by glass, Wanda tearfully bids goodbye to Vision, Billy and Tommy.

“Thank you for choosing me to be your mom,” she tells the boys, before they go to bed.

“Wanda,” Vision presses against the glass. “Darcy called me a ‘Flaga.’ Am I a ghost? Or just a fantasy?”

“You’re a spirit I created,” Wanda finally admits out loud. “You are my memories, and my pain. But most of all, you’re my love.”

For a moment they are able to kiss, as if the glass isn’t there. Then Wanda leaves the room, and doesn’t look back.  

Epilogue

Monica is still mostly Human, but like Wanda, she is now a hybrid—in her case, part Flaga. And it turns out, there is a battle being fought in the Mirror Realm, and Monica can help.

Wanda, meanwhile, creates herself a cabin in the woods, where she studies that Prophecy book—out of body. She is interrupted by the voice of one of her sons, calling from every mirror in the house, “Mom…!”

AN: An AU of an AU! Bloody hell.

This was a nightmare, both to "draw" and write, even with most of the work "cut out" for me. But worth it.

Because life is short, the images in this picture were largely traced, or straight up pasted clipart.