#I learned that today when it sank in that the only two planets we can conveniently see in the evening sky are saturn and neptune

[tea-with-eleni]

and thank the gods for that because it means I can say literally anything about uranus and neptune

Webb captures the Rings of Giant Planets

[mystery-star]

Wherever you go – Spock

Pairing: Spock x reader (gender neutral)

Warnings: mentions of blood and injury

Words: 3943

A/N: I had to write this after discussing the quick idea of it with @elysiansith

Please do not repost my work on other sites or platforms.

-

“No, I’ll do anything but that” you insisted, shaking your head

“Come on, you lost the bet, you agreed to this beforehand”

“It was agreed that I would do something that involved Spock”

“And I didn’t tell you what exactly so you’ve gotta do it”

“Come on, search something else. Make me spill a drink on him, sing a song in front of his quarter but not this”

“Nah, that won’t be as funny”

“No please” you begged

“Oh come on, he’ll ask you right away. I don’t think he likes it if people are following him around” you sighed

“But what do you mean with everywhere? I can’t go to his quarters if he doesn’t invite me in. What if he’s on the toilet?”

“Okay well that are exceptions”

“What is while I’m on my shift? I can’t just get up and leave the bridge whenever the Commander does”

“Fine, then you’ll need to say that you need to do something and then go to the toilet or something. Or just ask if you can go with him” you shook your head

“No please choose something else, this is ridiculous. Besides, when he does ask me why I’m following him, what am I supposed to say? He won’t understand the bet thing”

“Then tell him the truth”

“No”

“I bet he’ll find your declaration of love logical”

“Yeah sure. But what if someone else asks why I’m following Spock everywhere?”

“That doesn’t count. You’re not relieved then”

“Oh come on! You know exactly that Spock won’t address the matter until some days later”

“I know. Which’ll make it funnier for me”

“You’re the worst”

“I know”

-

As you had agreed with your friend, you would start with following Spock as soon as your shift started on the next day. But before you could start, the Captain came to you and said there was something he had to discuss with you.

“Am I in trouble?” you asked after the doors of the turbolift closed

“No, not at all. Just wanted to say that your friend informed be about the betting debt you have to honor”

“Oh God please no. I’d rather be in trouble”

“Well anyway, I just wanted to say that you’re free to leave whenever Spock goes. I might even send you with him from the start”

“What crime did I commit?”

“Now come on, Lieutenant. Almost everyone on this ship knows about your crush on Mr Pointy. Except for him but he doesn’t notice anything that has to do with others and their feelings. But something tells me, he cares for you too in a way that is more than just a professional relationship”

“Great and I just thought this couldn’t get any worse” the lift stopped and the Captain ordered to bring you to the bridge again.

“Oi, others would be happy to hear such news. Considering it’s Spock it’s almost as good as a ‘he loves you too’” you let out a groan.

“Just great” you repeated and the Captain only chuckled “I hope I die from embarrassment”

“Now come on, maybe it will quite alright”

“Yeah and you surely believe in the Easter bunny and Santa Clause?”

“Most did as a kid” you shook your head. When you finally were back on the bridge you were more or less pulled to the First Officer’s station “Mr Spock”

“Captain, Lieutenant (Y/L/N)” he greeted back.

“You know, I’ve been thinking about how you could use help sometimes”

“I doubt I have ever addressed such a matter and I do not know what could have given you the impression I would…”

“That is why I decided to name (Y/N) as your assistant”

“No” you moaned

“So I think it would be great if the two of you could get to know each other a bit and spend time together”

“No” you groaned, knowing that it meant it would only prolong your betting debt because it would deter the Vulcan from asking you why you followed him

“Very well” Spock answered after having eyed you “Please have a seat, Lieutenant” he slightly nodded his head to the vacant chair that was at an empty console.

“You know I wouldn’t mind if we collided with an asteroid today” you muttered to yourself as you sank down in the chair. It kinda looked like maybe you had to follow him to the toilet anyway to have him ask what you were doing.

-

As he had announced, the Captain kept sending you after Spock whenever he left the bridge and although Spock kept insisting that it was not necessary you followed him, Kirk too insisted on you accompanying him since he could also make it an order. So in a way, you were glad when your shift was over. Since Spock stayed a little longer, you too wanted to do this so that you could go with him but then you remembered that you only had to follow him, it had never been said that you had to wait for him to move. So you said goodbye and wished him a nice evening after five minutes and returned to your quarters. Of course your friend called you to hear how it was going and was delighted when you mentioned what the Captain was doing.

Also the following day was quite the same but fortunately this time Spock only had to leave once. But this evening he left with all of you and since you found it would be creepy to just follow him you took a deep breath you asked him if he would like to have dinner with you. To your surprise he agreed. But it also relieved you because otherwise you’d still have to follow him, which would have made it even more awkward. On the other hand, then he probably would have asked you about the meaning of it.

“I’m sorry by the way. For being around you all the time. But we don’t have a choice during work and I think it would make sense if we got used to it. Maybe it would help to get to know each other better” you gave a shrug

“You do not need to apologize”

“But… don’t you wonder why?”

“You mean if I wish to learn the reason that you decided to spend time with me?”

“Yes”

“No. After all you have just explained your reasoning” shit. That meant he probably wouldn’t ask you for the reason that. Of course unless you passed boundaries in a way. Which was something you were not willing to do. Not only because he was a superior officer and a colleague but also because you didn’t want him to think negatively of you “If you want, you can search a suitable table while I get food from the replicator”

“Hm” he had allowed you to leave but the rules of the lost bet said that you had to ignore that and still stay with him “Or what if we both got food and then search a place together? I don’t know maybe you have something like a favorite table or you find that there are seats that are better than others” he raised an eyebrow

“Having a preference towards a seat seems illogical but I agree to your suggestion”

“Great” you smiled.

-

For some reason, a part of you was surprised that you had a very nice evening with Spock and that you enjoyed it more than you thought. Of course you had to accompany him to his quarters afterwards and he had only said that you did not need to do this and but you had just insisted that you hadn’t noticed and thought it wouldn’t make sense to turn around now. But what surprised you most was that he thanked you for spending the evening with him, even though you had asked him to do so. Maybe your friend and the Captain were right. Maybe all of this wasn’t so bad. Which didn’t mean you were happy about it.

On the following day, however, you were quite glad about the fact that you were following Spock around. He was scheduled to go on a planet mission and or course Captain Kirk insisted that you went with him, as his assistant. A part of you wondered what would happen once the whole betting debt was resolved. If you would still be his assistant then. Maybe you should talk to Kirk about this. Because somehow you didn’t know if that was what you wanted. What if it meant you would be promoted? It didn’t feel right if that would just happen because of a bet. But it would be cool and a great way to pay your friend back in a way. Once you arrived on the planet, Spock started to put you into small groups in which you should explore the planet. And in the end, you were left but all teams of two were already formed so he just told you to join one of the groups

“Actually…” you said “Since I was made your assistant, I thought I could go with you?” right now you didn’t even know if you just wanted to be around him or if you just did it because of your bet. Your stupid friend had been right that you would enjoy following him at times

“Very well, Lieutenant, you may come with me” you gave a nod and took out your tricorder to get started with work. On your little tour, you finally came to a cave. While Spock stayed away from it you went closer and closer, curious to see what was inside. “Are you certain you wish to go inside?” he asked

“I just want to have a look inside. I won’t even go in far. Maybe there is something really interesting inside” he gave a nod and came closer, walking past you and entered the cave

“It actually was my cave” you muttered but followed him. He kept walking and walking until you reached a huge kind of hall “Okay wow that is awesome” you breathed as you started to make even more recordings while Spock must have seen something else. It turned out to be a nest with five big, turquoise eggs. Your superior had to squat down and started to examine them while you were not so happy anymore. What if suddenly the parents came and got mad? You doubted it ever was a good idea to get to close to animal’s babies. But the Vulcan didn’t seem to worry at all and he even touched one of the eggs with his palm. Shaking your head you walked away and started slapping the cold stone, trying to get a tricorder reading on them to determine the material. Suddenly you felt Spock look at you “Something wrong?”

“Can you try not to make any sounds?”

“Why that? Is something…”

“Shh” you were surprised that he actually shushed you. But it made you react and you were quiet, trying to listen to what he could have been hearing. Then you finally did hear something and you did not like it. It sounded like something screeching and rather loud thumps

“Maybe we should leave?” you asked Spock who gave a nod and you were trying to get back to the tunnel you had been coming from but it was blocked by a huge grey-brown animal that looked a lot like a pterosaur. “Okay I suppose Mommy is back home. And she’s blocking our only way out”

“We cannot be certain if it is a female” the animal screeched at you and started coming at you

“But we can be certain that it is mad” you growled as you jumped aside and regretted that you had no phaser with you.

“As soon as it unblocks the entrance you need to run”

“And leave you behind with this Pteranodon? It looks like it could swallow you whole”

“Judging by its size I suppose that the term Quetzalcaotlus would be more fitting”

“This or that, it’s mad and you don’t stand a chance” luckily, he took out his phaser and tried to shoot the alien but it didn’t seem to deter it a lot “Just great” you muttered as it came closer to Spock and when he tried to dive away under it, the being still managed to dig his claws into his back. When the animal moved away you saw that it had torn quite a piece of Spock’s uniform and his back was quickly covered in green blood. Unfortunately, the animal didn’t seem done and tried to pick at the Vulcan with it’s long beak, only narrowly missing him because he had rolled onto his back and then back to his stomach and was trying to get up. Not knowing what to do, you ran towards the nest and heaved one of the eggs out of it, kicking it away from it. Of course that caught the alien animal’s attention and it was slowly coming closer to you after it used it’s beak to stop the rolling egg. Quickly, you took another egg and rolled it into the other direction and then a third one in yet another direction. As it seemed the being decided that the eggs were more important than you and went after them so that you hurried over to Spock, pulling him back to his feet. He didn’t seem to be in best form, so you draped his arm over your shoulders, trying to support him

“Leaving me behind would increase your changes of escape and survival by 76.2…”

“Shh” you said “It was my idea to go in there and we both will get out. Now come on” you started pulling him back to the tunnel and he complied. Much to your luck, the alien was not following you anymore and you hoped it would stay like this and that not a second one of them would come. Shortly before you reached the exit of the cave, your superior took out his communicator, drumming up the rest of the landing party but you just snatched it out of his hand and then contacted the ship, telling them to beam Spock up right now because he was injured. “And don’t you dare saying something like ‘it’s just a scratch. I can do this’”

“Seeing that the being has hit me with three of his claws it would be incorrect to claim that I only obtained one scratch” you rolled your eyes when you felt the transporter beam and then were back on the Enterprise with him.

“Dear God, what happened?” the man behind the console asked

“We got attacked by an angry Mommy pterosaur”

“Well shit but the fact that it was a dinosaur is cool”

“I doubt it was a real dinosaur”

“Yeah whatever. All I hope is that this being wasn’t poisonous somehow because that looks quite bad like this already” you didn’t even dare to throw a glance to his back, knowing you’d regret it. You shifted your hold on him a little and wanted to bring him to sick bay when you met some doctors and nurses that probably had been on their way to you. Of course they were taking over for you and started asking questions about what had happened while they ran scanners over the two of you. Finally, you reached Medbay and one of the nurses told you that you couldn’t come in but much to your surprise Spock said that it was okay if you stayed with him. Needless to say that it flattered you and made you happy. Of course you couldn’t be in their way as they treated his injuries but afterwards you were allowed to move closer and looked down at him, not sure what to say.  “Does it hurt?”

“No, the medication I received is still effective” you gave a nod

“Do you think they’ll give you more?”

“Should I request for some, yes” you gave a nod and were not so sure what else to say but luckily he continued “(Y/N)”

“Yes?”

“While your choice to help me escape as well was not entirely logical since it endangered your own life, I still appreciate your actions” you chuckled

“I suppose this is your way of saying thank you?”

“No. I merely wanted to tell you that I appreciated what you did. However, I do thank you for helping me”

“You’re welcome. And I’m sorry I even wanted to go inside this cave. If I hadn’t, this wouldn’t have happened”

“As you surely know, I have taken the lead upon entering the cave therefore you do not need to feel responsible for what has occurred for it is not your fallacy in any way” you gave a nod “I would have explored the cavern even if you had not been with me”

“So a good thing I started following you around, huh?” you chuckled. Maybe you should thank your friend anyway.

“I suppose so”

“And you still don’t wonder why?”

“I do. However, the Captain has asked me not to inquire the reason”

“He did what?”

“He requested I did not ask you for the reason that you are following me around”

“That idiot” you muttered

“Why does this bother you?”

“Uhm… just because”

“Perhaps it has to do with the fact that you wish to be around me as much as you can due to your affection for me”

“My what?!”

“Is it not true that you hold romantic affection for me?”

“I-I…. How the hell did you know that?”

“Dr McCoy has informed me about it three months, two weeks and five days ago when he has been intoxicated”

“Wait you knew for almost four months and never said a word?”

“I was thinking you would wish to tell me about it yourself”

“Fuck that’s embarrassing”

“Why do you think so?”

“Well uh, here you are, telling me you knew and you don’t even seem to care. Because you surely don’t like me the same way”

“Your statement is correct” you stood there like struck by a lightning. Of course you had suggested it but hearing it like this, in such words, made it even worse. You really had to ask your friend to stop the stupid betting debt because it did not have the effect as you both wished. “Yet I have considered the information in an attempt to determine what you mean to me. I have come to the conclusion that I care about you in a way I have never cared about another but I cannot say if this is what humans would consider as loving someone, which is why I have found it better to not tell you since it could disappoint you”

“So you say you care about me? But why would this disappoint me?”

“While I am not certain which answer humans expect after the confess their feelings, I do believe that what I have just said is not it”

“Well it wouldn’t be nice to hear this from a human but from a Vulcan it is different. I-I mean I probably have already known you would not ‘love’ me. Or well maybe you do but you would suppress it. I mean… I didn’t even know what I was expecting when I was thinking about telling you how I feel. I never really thought as far as your answer, you know. My mind just always kinda skipped that part”

“If you say that you have skipped my answer, might I inquire the outcome you have imagined?”

“Well there were different scenarios of course. In most of them we just decided to be friends, sometimes we came together as a couple and sometimes it just ended in the most logical way”

“If you would clarify, which is the most logical way?”

“Okay good back then I thought that you’d just tell me you feel nothing for me…. but now you told me that you care for me, whatever exactly that means. So maybe I was right about the friends vision one” you gave a shrug and let out a sigh

“(Y/N)?” he said after some seconds

“Yes”

“I personally would prefer one of the scenarios where we start courting” you stare at him in disbelief.

“But… what if it turns out that you don’t love me or something?”

“(Y/N), as I have already assured you I care about you. And it is a different way of affection than the one I hold for my mother or Jim. Which is why I am certain that it must be a romantic affection”

“Oh” you looked down, then started smiling “Well that sounds awesome” you said “But you don’t even know what I have planned in all my scenarios” he raised an eyebrow

“I am certain you will let me know and I am willing to try out different things since I do not know much of human courtship. Maybe I can use the time I spend on sick leave to carry out some research on the topic” you chuckled

“Only if you want. After all, you live the Vulcan way and I could do some research on that as well. And maybe it’s best if we just do whatever we both are fine with”

“That sounds agreeable” you gave a nod and considered if it was appropriate if you took his hand but then you just decided to do it and see how he reacted. It seemed, like he was a little surprised but then squeezed your hand back, making you smile.

“I suppose that dissolves my betting debt as well”

“Which betting debt?”

“Oh… well” you chuckled, not sure if you should tell him but then grinned “I’m gonna tell you the real reason I followed you around. I lost a bet and because of it, I had to follow you around until you asked me why. But since the Captain heard of it, he made sure to give me a logical reason to follow you around by making me your assistant and asking you not to ask me why I’m following you” he raised his eyebrow again

“Please remind me to offer my thanks to him and your friend”

“No that would be so embarrassing!” you protested “But that doesn’t mean I’m fired?”

“Fire?”

“Well, I only was made your assistant because of the bet”

“I would not have agreed to the proposition if I did not believe you were suitable for the position. If you prefer your previous occupation, however, I will…””

“No! I mean I like it but working with you is fun too. I just thought you would be fed up with me or what do I know. Or that you would not want me as your assistant after I told you the reason why I became it in the first place”

“I have believed humans would enjoy to work with their partner if possible?”

“Well yes, but you’re Vulcan”

“I am also half-human” you chuckled

“So you’ll half enjoy working with me?”

“No, I suppose I will fully enjoy it” you smiled at him

“I’m just asking for my own safety” you heard McCoy call suddenly “Are you two decent so I can let Jim in? Or he’ll rip off my head”

“No you may allow him to come” Spock said “There is something that I and (Y/N) must inform him about” he added with a look to you that could be described as soft. At least for his standards. Well Spock probably was right about one point: you owed your friend a big thank you.

-

Taglist: @softsapphicideals

[olivinesea]

In the Golden Dark, pt. 2

Part 1

a/n: This was already pretty much done so here you go. These parts are all rather short but that can be nice right? ~1.6k

i can’t concentrate if i keep seeing your face showing up in tea leaves lit up on my tv i can’t stand up straight under your gravity so i lay awake with my eyes closed

“Did you know 12% of people dream in black and white?”

“Wha-what?” Hotch groggily looked at the time on his phone. He had answered it blindly, autopilot kicking in to attend to the buzzing beside him on the couch. He blinked again and brought the phone back to his ear to hear Spencer’s voice more clearly.

“Yeah! It used to be a lot more when television was only in black and white but now that’s shifted obviously. Elderly people are still a lot more likely to have dreams that are—“

“Spencer,” Hotch interrupted the way the words were beginning to tumble out. When he was met with an abrupt silence he realized he didn’t have a follow up, he just needed a moment to breathe. To take in the dark living room, the flickering light of the television, its muted colors and grainy film showing a syndicated rerun, the kind only played in the middle of the night or the middle of the day, times when no productive person was meant to be watching. Something soft in its age, he found it comforting to put it on when he couldn’t sleep, woken again by nightmares that some monster had found their way to Haley and Jack. That they were suffering and he didn’t even know.

On the other end of the line, Spencer held his breath. He had been nervous about making the call, he wasn’t sure if it was too intrusive, too far across the boundaries they normally worked within. It wasn’t that he was worried about waking Hotch, he knew the other man was already awake. Even before they had started talking more, casually sharing details about the time they spent away from the office, it was obvious that Hotch did not sleep like a normal person. It was something else that they shared.

Seemingly endless minutes passed without another word from either man and his fear that he’d made a mistake grew. He told himself that Hotch was not pleased with the interruption. That he was being too assuming—why would Hotch be interested in anything he had to say at three in the morning? He’d called spurred on by the acute need to share a thought and, though he wasn’t totally conscious of it, a wish to hear that comforting voice, maybe even a quiet chuckle. He had smiled imagining that gentle sound, only he hadn’t realized it, the corners of his mouth moving without informing the rest of his mind. He touched his lips now with cold fingertips, running them over the dry skin, oblivious to the way his jaw clenched.

The silence between them hung like a bridge. There was a moment where both of them looked out at their respective living rooms, mentally steeling themselves to take a step and hope the other would meet them. Hope that they wouldn’t find themselves suspended over the water, alone as ever.

“I’m sorry for calling so late,” Spencer sounded so remorseful Hotch felt guilty immediately. He hadn’t meant cause him any anxiety with his long silence, he was just trying his best to gather his thoughts. To make sense of what he meant to do.

“It’s ok, really, I—“ Hotch hesitated, unsure how much detail to go into, how much reassurance was the right amount. He felt unreasonably awkward suddenly and twitched his fingers in irritation, “I wasn’t really sleeping anyway.”

“Really?” Spencer scrunched his eyes up, disliking the eagerness bleeding from his voice. He couldn’t help it though, the prospect of having the other man’s attention, even if it was only his voice reflecting from a satellite, knowing that Hotch was listening made him feel more secure. He’d spent too many restless nights pacing his apartment, starting and abandoning tasks in attempts to distract himself from the way the night was pressing uncomfortably close, threatening to overtake his mind. To have a friend to talk to, to reflect back his own reality, was a gift he could barely believe he deserved.

Hotch grunted as he adjusted himself on the couch cushions, supporting the back of his head on the pillows, resting the phone between his shoulder and ear. With his free hand he pulled up the blanket that had tangled at his feet. “Wide awake,” he said dryly. “What were you saying about dreams?”

Spencer’s smile was so big Hotch could hear it through the phone as the man stumbled ahead with the details of some completely unnecessary study. Hotch wanted to ask what had led to him reading such a thing but he was enjoying the happy way Spencer was running through all the new material he’d learned. He adored listening to Spencer speak, how he sometimes stopped short when remembering a related detail and how there’d be a pause while he took a split second to make the choice whether to jump to the new train of thought. Hotch smiled to himself and was pleased enough to offer hums of interest at inflection points. He let his eyes wander back to the television, as the title credits of another episode of Bonanza played across the screen, the pale wheat and horses and cowboys, already a distant fantasy in the 1960s, ancient history by today’s standards. His eyes fell half closed as he continued to listen to Reid’s voice.

“And, they just published a new study about how sleep deprivation decreases the body’s pain tolerance.”

Hotch snorted softly at this. “They really had to get a bunch of scientists together to figure that out? Someone paid for that?”

“Well it is always important to gather data and scientific evidence for these types of things. Anecdotal testimony won’t lead to any developments in the care for conditions like chronic pain,” Reid paused when he heard more quiet laughter from Aaron. He grinned.

“Do you want to hear something really crazy? They’ve found a connection between a person’s favorite sleeping position and their personality. Can you imagine!”

“Hmmph,” Hotch sank deeper into the cushions, settling in for whatever came next.

*

The calls became as regular as the midnight pancakes. Spencer would call with some piece of trivia, every night a new topic. He had a seemingly endless well of knowledge to draw on. In truth he spent the day trying to think of new ideas to share, new information he thought Hotch would appreciate. For no reason other than his own private satisfaction, he grouped topics thematically. This week they were going to be talking about space.

Now Hotch was ready, drowsy but checking his phone every few minutes to see if he’d somehow missed it ringing. He was looking at it yet again when it buzzed. He stared at the screen for a moment before answering, letting the name that flashed send a small thrill up his spine. He was not sure how it’d happened but he had come to rely on these calls. They still hadn’t discussed it, hadn’t acknowledged what this extracurricular time spent together might mean. They were simply seeking comfort, not questioning how this might be perceived outside these invisible moments.

“Hey Spence,” he barely got the words out before Spencer launched into that night’s prepared curiosities.

“Did you know most of the visible stars are actually multiple star systems? The singular stars are so much harder to see that astronomers used to believe that it was fairly uncommon to find a singular star like our sun.They hypothesized this was a contributing factor to why we hadn’t found evidence of extraterrestrial life. It is much harder for a planet to have the stability necessary for a habitable atmosphere with the potential fluctuations of a binary star system. Without as many single stars it made sense that it was exceedingly unlikely for life to form outside of our solar system.”

“I think it’d be nice,” Hotch murmured, not really thinking about what he was saying.

“What’s that?”

“Oh, ah,” Hotch stammered, a little embarrassed to have the comment acknowledged. He felt his neck growing warm as he tried to make out a reply. “Well, having two suns. I think it could be nice."
 “Why?” Spencer was genuinely curious.

“Um, I guess, I imagine it would be warmer for one,” he paused before adding on, waiting to see what Spencer’s reaction might be. He could almost hear the wheels of his mind turning with all the reasons Hotch’s logic was faulty. He hurried on before he became too self-conscious to finish his thought. “And, I’ve just never really liked the night, all the darkness. Maybe with two suns we could have a little more light in the world.”

Instead of responding, Spencer remained quiet, surprised by this uncharacteristically whimsical thought. Hotch could feel his whole neck had turned red, along with the warming tips of his ears.

“I—I don’t really like the night either,” he tried to sympathize. “It can feel…overwhelming.”

They sat for a moment, not sure where to take this or how the facts had turned into feelings.

“I’m happy I have you to talk to though.”

It was simple, but it was true and sweet and Hotch smiled, closing his eyes to better absorb the words.

“I’m happy too, Spencer.”

Now they were both blushing, the depth of meaning behind these brief statements readily apparent. For a moment, feeling the heat dancing across his face, Hotch wondered if this wasn’t a mistake. Maybe he was allowing things to become something irresponsible, something he couldn’t so easily walk back. He pictured Spencer, sitting across from him, animated and full of life, pulling further away from the shadows that teased around the edges. It didn’t matter, he decided. It didn’t matter what this was, only that they had found a hand to hold through the night.

“So, what else have you got for me?”

~Part 3~

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars #1-3

May, 1984

THE WAR BEGINS

Oof, here we go.

Just gotta replicate the pace that let me do the Hawkeye miniseries in one go, three times in a row.

This is probably too much effort considering its Secret Wars (or more accurately Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars) and maybe there’s not going to be a lot of big changes from this in the Avengers book to really justify it.

But we’re getting Jim Shooter writing the Avengers and his non-consecutive runs were a lot better than I had remembered. And it continues the theme he had from the Avengers book.

It just makes sense in a nonsense way to cover this story.

Last relevant time in Avengers! Acting Completely Normal Vision warned the Avengers about some weird, possibly hostile energy surges right in time for an energy surge to surge energetically in Central Park.

When the Avengers went to investigate, they found a weird structure that looked like a techy coliseum maybe. When some of the Avengers wandered into it (apparently the most bankable Avengers? Sucks to be Vision and Wanda, shrug) they vanished.

In the next issue, after several days, these heroes returned, speaking of a secret war they fought. Weird stuff like She-Hulk taking the Thing’s place on the Fantastic Four happened. In other books, Spidey got a cool new suit.

Would you know more?

After being raptured in their various books, the missing superheroes all end up on one of those distinctive structures like the one that appeared in Central Park, except IN SPACE.

Its cool that the Avengers will have some company.

We’ve got a terrific 3/4ths of the Fantastic Four, the X-Men (including Lockheed but not including Kitty Pryde for some reason), the Avengers, Iron Man, Spider-Man, the totally Articulate Hulk, and hilariously Magneto is also here.

Maybe Secret Wars is just setting up the most awkward moment in the universe, as a prank show.

I think I’d enjoy a big event that turned out to be a prank show at the last minute. The fan discontent. Imagine.

Everyone introduces themselves to each other but mostly the audience and Ben Grimm claims his new codename as the Easter Bunny.

Checking, marvel wiki doesn’t have Easter Bunny listed as one of Ben’s known aliases. Cowards.

Looking up into space, Captain America spots another one of the totally cool constructs and Professor X scans that it contains EEEEEEEVIL.

Specifically Amora the Enchantress, Ultron, the Wrecking Crew, the Absorbing Man, the Lizard, VICTOR VON DOOOOOM, Kang the Conqueror, Doctor Octopus, and Molecule Man. Also, hilariously, Galactus is there.

I’m more convinced than ever that this is a prank show.

You know what would be more hilarious? If Punisher ended up on this construct.

The distribution of villains is kind of odd though. Galactus and Doctor Doom map to the FF. Doctor Octopus and the Lizard to Spider-Man. Ultron, Molecule Man, and Kang are Avengers foes. The Absorbing Man and the Wrecking Crew can go a couple ways but started off as Thor villains. And Amora is usually a Thor villain but supposedly has chilled out around this time or at least is less of a pain than her horny sister.

No X-Men villains. Because Magneto is chilling with them in the generally heroic pod.

Also, all the heroes were raptured from Earth while the villains were grabbed from Earth, from space, from Asgard, resurrected just to be here, or from the FUTURE.

I know marketing is wagging the dog but be consistent, secret organizer who we don’t know yet.

The Thing points out that Magnet is off-sides, re: being in the hero construct, and Magneto is like ‘hey, chill out dudes’ and denies specifically doing murders.

Magneto: “I know not what power transported me here from my secret lair, nor why I was placed among you -- but I find it more appropriate to ask why such as you were judged fit to be placed in my presence!”

Oof.

Burn.

Then the conversation is put on halt on account of the wildest shit any of them have ever seen.

An entire galaxy vanishes but probably not due to a wave of anti-matter.

Thor: “It’s gone! Gone -- ! Swept away like dust before some unseen, giant hand!”

And then around that last star left unswept, various chunks merge together to form some sort of world, perhaps for battle.

A nice touch for later is that you can definitely see that one of the chunks is a stray chunk of city.

Some of the villains start squabbling because close quarters, ego, etc.

But Ultron goes hey we’re allowed to fight? I’m the best at that.

Ultron: “I am Ultron! I do not understand the events transpiring! I do not understand how I came to be resurrected... nor how I came to be here! Nothing computes... Insignificant! I am Ultron! My purpose is to slay that which lives. You are all living things, ergo -- Ultron must destroy you!”

With the benefit of having read all the Avengers up to now, I feel that Ultron got up on the wrong side of the resurrection a little.

He’s not not like this but he’s not usually this turned on?

(Then again, maybe he just came back cranky)

DOOM grabs and shakes Molecule Man to do something about this because given enough time even the mighty DOOM might fall before Ultron.

Ultron is famously annoying to defeat, what with that adamantium.

But Molecule Man is in therapy after the Avengers kicked his shit and Tigra yelled at him for being a punk. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone.

So Doom with all his brilliant genius tells MM a cool way to help out that won’t hurt anyone. Directly.

Using his Molecule Man power over molecules to lightly toss Ultron into Galactus.

So that Galactus goes ‘who the fuck scuffed my boots’ and rips out all the energy in Ultron’s Ultron.

He can do that.

Why wouldn’t he? If he can do that to a planet, he can do it to a pissbaby robot. Even one apparently containing more power than an atom bomb.

Then, because this is one of those plots where things are always thenning, a rift opens in the nothingness of space and a heavenly esque light shines out. A warbly voice commands the action figures beat each other up.

I mean. Its more like

The Beyonder: “I am from beyond! Slay your enemies and all you desire shall be yours! Nothing you dream of is impossible for me to accomplish!”

But you have to admire that this toy commercial of a comic book is being honest and upfront about being a story where action figures bonk off of each other.

Galactus just hears ‘i can finally shake off these persistent forever munchies’ and flies off to demand prepayment for action figure bonking, with DOOM following behind him.

The Beyonder speaks up warning Galactus that hey, personal space. And that a guy that can effortlessly wipe out a galaxy is gonna have a sweet barrier but Galactus wants the hunger pangs gone and does not listen.

DOOM recognizes a bad idea when he sees one once in a while and hangs back but still gets blown out of space by the force of Galactus bonking off the Beyonder’s barriers.

Captain America: “They were swatted back like flies!”

Professor X: “To the Beyonder, even Galactus is less than a fly, Captain!”

Interruption dealt with, the Beyonder gets the show on the road and sends the two constructs to different parts of the patchwork planet.

The Marvel Super Heroes And Magneto land on some hill and quickly make sure that there are no villains excepting Magneto around.

With Magneto around, the non-X-Men raise an objection to Magneto being around.

He sank a Russian submarine with all hands back in X-Men #150 but he insists that it was self-defense and also they started it.

The X-Men’s position is ‘hey he’s a jerk but he’s our jerk plus we could use his help? The bad guys get GALACTUS, how is that fair?’

Well, they don’t say it but they’re probably thinking it.

And Hawkeye decides to be a little racist today.

Hawkeye: “You mutants stick together, huh? Well, sticking to a blood-soaked maniac like him doesn’t speak well of you, pal!”

Dude, Clint. Your dear old friend is Wanda.

Wait, why ISN’T Wanda here? Did the toy people really not want her? Fools. Her husband is toyetic as all get out.

Also, point of order, Wolverine? If anyone qualifies as ‘hey he’s a jerk but he’s our jerk!’ here its you.

Johnny “good life choices” Storm decides he’ll just kick Magneto’s ass and end the debate but yeah. Yeah, no. Magneto makes a fool of him.

And then Magneto decides eff this noise and flies off.

With Magneto alienated (good job, guys), Professor X decides this group needs some dang leadership and throws a nomination to Reed Richards. Reed defers since he’s thinking of Sue, left at home and not able to participate in the event.

Wasp, the cool leader of the Avengers, nominates instead Captain America.

Wasp: “We’re off in a strange land, up to our ears in a little secret war that may decide the fate of the universe! Some people don’t know me well! They might have doubts... and there’s no room for that!”

I’m baffled that there’s people here who don’t know Wasp who has been heroing since the 60s but sure. Cap(tain America) probably gets more crossovers and whatever.

I mean, heck, we’re talking a group of heroes consisting of the Avengers (who she already leads), the Fantastic Three (who she’s well acquainted with), and the X-Men (who I’m sure she’s met, although awkwardly its going to later be revealed that Wasp is in the Hellfire Club, but only the sex parts).

And I guess Wolverine’s extensive backstory with Cap doesn’t exist yet because Wolverine isn’t keen on him being the leader, describing him as the least of the assembled heroes. When Hawkeye is right there!

I kid because I love.

Meanwhile, DOOM wakes up adjacent to Galactus ankle and heads to a nearby fortress which he correctly assumes is where the villains have ended up.

Wait, the heroes get beamed down to a random hill while the villains get sent to an advanced fortress with weaponry and we later learn vehicles sold separately?

Kinda stacking the deck, the Beyonder.

You gave the villains GALACTUS and A FORTRESS PLAYSET right out of the gate.

The other villains tell Doom that they’ve (mostly) decided that he should be their leader. But Doom has bigger fish to fry than the prizes that the Beyonder is offering.

In typical Doomesque fashion, he wants the whole kettle. But the other villains what with their petty concerns think he’s too afraid to fight.

So he ditches.

He goes to steal-borrow a spaceship and even though he hates the thought, takes off to go talk to Richards. And then Kang shoots him out of the sky with a GIANT GUN THAT THE VILLAIN FORTRESS ALSO HAS? to stop him from allying with the heroes.

Said (marvel super) heroes see the distant explosion and fly as a group in the most hilarious way possible to check it out.

God, I have always loved this image. Its squished down into the bottom third of the page but its a delight.

They find Doom sprawled in the crash site, rambling that he’ll only speak to RICHARRRRRDS and about the Beyonder’s power. But Cap offends Doom mightily but offering him a hand up and because Doom sees pity in Cap and RICHARRRRRRDS eyes.

So he blasts the heroes and fucks off.

How very Bakugou of him.

And right as the heroes recover from that, a bunch of villains arrive to get this secret war started.

I have a fondness for this particular issue. For a long while, issue 1 was the only issue of Secret Wars I could find. So I just had the start of this story with all these non-Spider-Man non-X-Men heroes I barely knew cliffhangering into an attack by villains I really didn’t recognize except for Doc Ock and the Lizard.

It was a window into another side of the Marvel Universe. And for child me, this first issue worked perfectly to intrigue me. All these characters, the very straightforward conflict, all the complications that immediately pop up like Magneto, Galactus, and Doom. Alas, small child resources.

June, 1984

PRISONERS of War!

The heroes react slowly to the sudden villain attack but thankfully, the villains aren’t working together well. Unthankfully, half of the heroes were already knocked out by the first attack.

Meanwhile, over at Doctor Doom’s side of the plot, he flies back over to where Galactus just in time to see him finally rouse from being slapped down by the Beyonder.

Galactus floats to his feet and wanders off.

Doom: “He ignored me! As though I were a gnat buzzing at his feet! And so I am... Just as all of us, even Galactus himself, are but insects to the all-powerful Beyonder! Thus, the others have chosen to play the Beyonder’s simple game -- thereby, in effect, paying homage to him. Should I, too, pay homage? Should I worship at the feet of this god-like being -- or chose another path... one only Doom would dare!”

I think anyone that knows Doom knows which option he’s gonna choose.

He heads back to the villain fortress and finds Ultron’s deactivated body and decides Doom can use this.

Meanwhile, back at the first secret battle of the secret war, the heroes rally and start fighting back under Cap(tain America)’s leadership.

She-Hulk even gets a designated girl fight with the only female villain on the villain team.

I’d complain, I would. But at least She-Hulk isn’t the only heroine on the hero side.

She-Hulk: “Hiya! I’m the She-Hulk! You must be the Enchantress! Gee, I’ve heard so much about you -- ! You’re a not-nice lady!”

Enchantress: “A green woman? Is there no end to the varieties of mortals?”

The Enchantress magic slaps She-Hulk away and comments that she could crush She-Hulk physically but its beneath her.

Yeah, all Asgardians have some level of super strength, that’s right. Even the squishy wizards.

But all She-Hulk heard was, ‘someone I can really punch!’

She-Hulk: “I don’t often duke it out with someone solid enough to really unload on -- and slow enough to let me! Oh, wow! That was, like tubular, you know -- to the max!”

Uh. Jen, are you okay? Did you have a stroke? You don’t usually talk so much in Mario World secret world levels.

I think maybe Jim Shooter didn’t have a good grasp on her. I don’t think he’s ever written for her. And the other heroes mostly don’t vary too much from generic hero speaking patterns. Add some smart for smart characters, add some rude to Wolverine, and so on.

The battle wraps up with Kang, the Enchantress, and the Wrecking Crew captured and the rest of the villains fleeing when the battle didn’t go their way.

Cap sends Storm off to scout for a cool playset that they can use as shelter and she does so, noting that the winds on Battleworld are super easy to control. Like Battleworld was created to create ideal fighting conditions for everyone. Pretty neat, the Beyonder.

Storm finds a particularly rad fortress (”Bigger than fifty-four and a half Pentagons, I’d estimate!” Wow!) and the heroes move in.

I unironically enjoy how toyetic this story is with the fortresses and the vehicles and the weapons. Because I’m almost positive that Mattel barely capitalized on it.

There were only two playsets. Pitiful.

Over in their new headquarters, Reed stashes the captured villains in some form of psychostasis which “works by controlling aggression through brainwave modulation!”

He also sticks Enchantress in a healing pod to address that nasty case of being She-Hulked right in the face. Nothing will salve her ego though.

Captain America: “It’s no wonder that the name Mister Fantastic is renowned for compassion as well as courage! You give added meaning to the word hero, Richards!”

Whenever someone loudly announces that Reed is super compassionate, it makes me feel like they’re overcompensating.

Nobody ever makes note of, say, Captain America’s compassion.

With the prisoners (of war? Is that the whole reason for the title?) accommodated, Cap calls everyone for a meeting in a cool meeting dome he found which has a small waterfall for aesthetic and so everyone has to yell to be heard.

Wolverine yells that they should mop up the rest of the villains and get this over with.

Not mentioning that in order to “win it” they’d have to kill the villains, which none of the heroes have shown any interest in doing so far.

Cap(tain America) replies that A) planet big and they have no idea where the villains got to. And B) the remaining villains slash antagonists are Galactus, Doctor Doom, Molecule Man, Doctor Octopus, the Wrecker, the Absorbing Man, and Magneto. Not really people you mop up.

In a fun logistics bit, Cap sends out a patrol to make sure the area is secure but he also sends out two additional groups to find  if there are any places in this fortress they can sleep and whether there's any... food.

Makes me imagine a Secret Survival War where the sides have to wrestle over limited resources.

Hours later, the villains that escaped the fracas arrive back at their fortress.

I’m sort of confused here.

Maybe it took so long because they had to make sure they weren’t followed. Or maybe because they didn’t have the sweet tripod vehicle anymore. But think about the flow of events of: everyone beamed down to Battleworld > Doom ditches the villains and gets shot down > heroes investigate and Doom ditches > villains show up for cliffhanger fight.

The villain fortress should be pretty close to where that fight took place. And then the heroes find a nearby fortress of their own so their fortress should be pretty close to the villain fortress. Maybe not in the same neighborhood but surely the same zip code.

Anyway, they find that while they were gone, Doom swanned in and renamed the place the Doombase.

If they have problems with it, they can talk to his Ultron.

Which I’m surprised he didn’t rename Doomtron.

Doom also tells them that he’s in charge now.

Absorbing Man: “Aw! Who gives a hoot! I need a meal an’ sleep! You wanna be in charge, Doom? Okay by me!”

If you think about it, this is just some steps added what the villains wanted all along.

They wanted Doom to be their leader but he told them he had bigger fish to fry and fucked off. Now he’s fucked back on and told them all that he’s their leader. They initially object before reconsidering due to Doomtron but, yeah, its all gone full circle.

Doom is a lot more cordial to Molecule Man though.

Doom: “Molecule Man... uh, Mr. Reece, I believe it is? I trust you were not inconvenienced.”

Molecule Man: “Well, being absolute master of molecules I can just assimilate molecules when I want, so I never have to be hungry, and I can just shoo away dirt molecules, so I’m always nice and clean -- but I am tired!”

Doom: “I have prepared a special chamber for you! I hope you like it!”

Molecule Man: “If not, I can always reconstruct the molecules -- !”

Heh.

Nice to see Jim Shooter able to follow up on the trajectory he sent Molecule Man on.

The rest of the villains head off but Doctor Octopus, the only other brain cell in this group, hangs back to talk to DOOM.

He wants to know what he plans to do about Galactus and then shows Doom on the biggest screen TV that Galactus is standing on a mountain glowing with an awesome power.

Doom just retorts that his plans are for his forces to triumph.

Doctor Octopus: Something tells me he’s got ambitions that dwarf merely triumphing in the Beyonder’s little contest! The question is whether he will destroy us in trying to achieve them -- or immediately after fulfilling them?!

Like I said, the only other brain cell in this group.

Meanwhile, while Magneto secretly sneaks into the hero fortress for Reasons, the heroes have a quiet moment that lets this Secret Wars biz really sink in.

Wasp: “I’d be having tea in my studio now, Jenny... And lunch on my patio tomorrow... This... um... situation we’re in... is kind of... much, you know? I feel there’s just a little thin wall inside me holding back a flood of despair!”

Its a nice touch, if intentional, that Wasp only admits this kind of thing now that she’s passed off the leadership responsibilities to Captain America. Its been a recurring character beat that she’s been keeping these sorts of worries to herself as chairwoman.

Over in another part of the fortress, Cyclops complains that he was right in the middle of his dang honeymoon when he was yanked into this event.

Cyclops: “I don’t know about you, Richards, but more than angry or afraid, I feel cheated! I -- I was on the verge of real happiness...”

Oof. This really sets the tone for his marriage with Madelyne Pryor.

Spider-Man and the Human Torch even have a little conversation.

Spider-Man: “You mean it doesn’t shake you, Torch, being here? What if we don’t get home?”

Human Torch: “The Fantastic Four have been off on space missions a couple of times, Spider-Man! We’ll get back! Believe me!”

I like when they’re friends.

So, I’m not sure what Magneto’s plan actually was. He was going to sabotage the fortress’ fusion generator as a distraction but Spider-Man’s Spider-Sense Spider-Alerts him to shenanigans afoot and he runs off to the power plant while Johnny Storm goes to get the other heroes.

Magneto decides to abandon whatever his plan was and captures Wasp as a consolation prize.

Gasp, another prisoner of war!

The Thing tries to give chase but inexplicably turns back to normal, smooth skinned Ben Grimm.

Also, Magneto escapes with the Wasp.

It’s like the aardvark says, you can get what you want and still not be happy.

Captain Marvel is holding the randomly anti-mutant ball for Hawkeye here and comments that none of the X-Men showed up to help stop Magneto.

Cap(tain America) tells her to belay that.

Captain America: “Let’s keep our minds on solving problems, not creating more!”

And they can’t even go after Magneto or rescue the Wasp right now because they have bigger problems: Galactus glowing with an awesome power and a massive storm that’s forming on Battleworld.

July, 1984

TEMPEST WITHOUT, CRISIS WITHIN!

The Beyonder has thrown in a nice stage hazard to keep things fresh in the form of a massive storm raging on Battleworld, with lighting that shatters mountains and winds that could tear someone’s limbs clean off.

Or perhaps its the unintentional result of just slapping a planet together out of random stuff you have lying around. The climate must be shot to shit.

I like it either way. Secret Wars has a lot of very toyetic collisions between groups of characters so its nice when Battleworld itself manages to be an obstacle.

Over in his giant U-shaped fortress, Magneto finally unwraps Wasp from the ball of random metal crap he has her in.

He lets her wander around until she finds him so that he can be all casual and eating a space scone.

Magneto: “Do not bother trying to attack me, my dear! My person is magnetically shielded!”

Wasp: “Well, la-de-da!”

Wasp: -blows up his space scone- “You think I have to strike at you directly to hurt you, monster?”

Hilarious spite, thy name is Janet van Dyne.

She also makes the point that magnetic shielding or no, she could bring this whole room down. Her being able to knock over a small house with her pew pew hasn’t stopped being true.

Magneto hastens to ask her not to do that because neither of them want to be out in the storm outside.

Besides, he just wants to talk! And flirt!

Magneto: “You are obviously a woman of intelligence and understanding as well as great beauty -- and I am not the monster you believe I am -- which is precisely what I wish to discuss!”

Wasp: “Oh? My intelligence, understanding and beauty or your non-monsterhood?”

Magneto: “Why... both!”

Back at the hero base (which is apparently ROUGHLY THE SIZE OF CHICAGO?? I want that playset), the storm has almost completely flooded the area, leaving just the top dome and such poking above the water.

The storm keeps dropping chunks of mountain at the base but Thor is standing on top, protecting it while grinning like a loon.

Captain Marvel even speculates that Thor could calm the storm but is whipping it up into a greater frenzy instead. Those storm gods, amirite?

Hawkeye is also standing by, with his explosive arrow, thinking to himself that if Thor fails, Hawkeye will totally save the day.

I don’t know whether that’s sad or endearing.

Mostly though he’s trying to distract himself from thinking about the new wife he left behind.

Cap, Reed, and Hulk are watching the villain base because apparently they do know where it is. The storm is keeping the villains in too but Cap figures they’ll pull one desperate attack as soon as the storm breaks.

They’ve already lost four of their dudes. Plus, Galactus isn’t a team player.

Spider-Man is just swinging around, enjoying how good for swinging the random technological pipes and tubes and whatsits are when he stumbles upon the X-Men having a secret meeting.

Professor X has decided, possibly on the basis of two (2) rude comments from Hawkeye and Captain Marvel, that the X-Men just don’t belong here and that they’d be better off going and teaming up with Magneto.

This... sure is a take.

Rogue comments that the Avengers don’t trust her because of that time she kicked their asses collectively. Which, hey, very possibly. They haven’t really had a thing to say about you though. They’ve mostly been grouchy about Magneto.

Which is kinda born out by the way he tried to blow up their base and definitely kidnapped the Wasp?? And is even now aggressively eating scones at her?

That’s the Magneto you guys want to go join because he’s more your people than the Fantastic Avengers and friends are?

You know, there’s a pattern I sometimes see with the X-Men where they loudly insist that the other superheroes don’t help them and don’t care about mutant stuff while at the same time doing shit like this.

“Should we get Reed Richards, smartest dick in the world to help with the legacy virus or the techno-organic virus Stryfe shot into Xavier? NAHHHH Beast can handle it.”

“Should we stick with the other superheroes or go hang with Magneto instead in a cool mutants only U-shaped fortress? Well, U is the coolest letter that isn’t X...”

If you squint, you can definitely see Krakoa all the way in the future.

Anyway, Spider-Man overheard all of this and goes ‘I’M TELLING!’

Wolverine tries to tell him that snitches get stitches but the thing is?

Spider-Man is ridiculous. He’s a ridiculously good combination of skills and powers which lets him make chumps out of entire groups at a time.

He’s embarrassed the Fantastic Four, the Avengers, and now he’s about to embarrass the X-Men.

After making them all feel foolish, Spider-Man gets away and goes to tell Reed what that doody-head Xavier said when Xavier uses his psychic powers to just wipe the entire encounter out of Spider-Man’s memory.

Yeah, it’s to cover their imminent blowing off but also? I don’t think he wants anyone else to find out how badly his X-Men just got stomped.

Psychics are too OP, I tell you what.

In fairness IN FAIRNESS, the X-Men kind of have the right to fuck right off if they wish. I don’t even know what it had to be in secret. In fact, doing it in secret is a massive dick move of its own for reasons.

What would the Fantastic Avengers have done if the X-Men had just said ‘hey we’re heading out’? Would they have put them in stasis tube jail? I doubt it.

Professor X made the decision to handle this the stupidest way for whatever reason. That scamp.

Speaking of Magneto, he’s over at the U-Lair turning down a partnership offer from DOOM. So, hey, he has standards.

Wasp has become less ‘i’ll blow up this room and your breakfast’ about him over the course of whatever the hell they discussed in their offscreen chat.

Magneto even starts to make out with her and Wasp is like ehhhhhhhhhh what the fuck why not.

Why is this happening?

I guess he has a...................... magnetic personality?

Eh? Eh??

No, but seriously, I do have a theory that I heard someplace but it’ll have to wait.

What’s weird is that there’s a Marvel What If about some spinoff babies that come about if the heroes and villains got stuck on Battleworld and never managed to leave.

Wasp has a son with Human Torch. Which is pretty weird and comes from nowhere. I guess a lot can happen during a massive time skip. My point being though, its weird that they didn’t have a Wasp/Magneto baby instead given the weird chemistry they have here.

Meanwhile, over at DOOMBASE, DOOM has some women in giant tubes.

That’s So Doom.

Doctor Doom: “All is ready -- ! This alien technology, so rich, so subtle... so easily harnessed to serve my purpose... Energy, tapped from the raging tempest... And two mortal subjects who dare to gamble for power -- knowing that to lose is death, for truly, here I shall test the limits of power a human body can contain! With the throwing of a switch... so -- the die is cast! Hear me -- ! Power must be seized -- ! Crave it! Welcome it! Drink it in, despite the pain... or it will destroy you.”

And thus are Volcana and Titania created!

Talk about lasting effects of Secret Wars! Titania is going to be around forever! Mostly annoying She-Hulk!

Where did Doom find two random women to give superpowers?

Denver, Colorado.

No, seriously.

That city chunk we saw as Battleworld formed? That’s Denver, Colorado, USA, EARTH.

Why isn’t there a miniseries or one-shot about a normal ass civilian from Denver having to deal with OH MY GOD WHERE DID EARTH GO?

I actually read an interesting thing re: this scene. It exists because Mattel asked Marvel to introduce some new female characters so Shooter wrote in these two and a third who I’ll get to when I do.

Mattel then promptly used none of these characters for the associated toyline.

The toyline, in fact, used none female characters at all. It made toys of characters who weren’t in the story but did not have a single female character.

So its very weird that they asked Marvel to introduce some but I’m not going to knock the results.

Doom introduces these two new characters to the other villains.

Hilariously, Absorbing Man guesses that Doctor Doom just made women from scratch. Because doesn’t it sound like something he could do?

Volcana and Molecule Man immediately hit it off, her being attracted to his sensitivity and him being attracted to... positive attention at all, I guess?

He muses that he could easily stop the storm outside, because molecules, but his therapist told him to let nature take its course. “Unless Doom asks me to!”

And Titania and Absorbing Man. They don’t hit it off. She either wants to hit him or hit that and its not clear and it might be both.

(Spoilers: Its both)

Titania: “You! Absorbing Man! You look like the toughest man here! Get up!”

Absorbing Man: “Whatcha got in mind?”

Titania: “I’m going to do anything I want to you! Everything I always wanted to do to everybody who used to be bigger and stronger than me! Maybe I’ll just play with you... or maybe I’ll make you eat dirt... or maybe...”

Absorbing Man: “Woman, if you got somethin’ to prove, prove it tomorrow against the guys we’re fightin’!”

Titania: “You’re backing down?”

Absorbing Man: “Nope! I just ain’t getting up! I got nothin’ to prove... to a dame!”

Would you believe that they become one of the healthiest and most stable romantic relationships in Marvel?

Speaking of weird relationships, back over at hero base, Thor goes and pops the lid on Enchanteress’ healing tube because he’s bored and wants to talk to a peer. A god peer.

Enchantress is at first more characteristically worried about what her face looks like after being She-Hulked.

But she then creates a portal so she and Thor can go have a chat.

Later, it’s morning and Hulk has been too busy stressing over losing his Banner smarts to actually keep watch or wake up Cap for watch like he was supposed to.

So when the villains ram an airship into the hero base, the heroes are not at all prepared.

Titania hurls a giant slab of wall through the room the Terrific Three are sharing, breaking Johnny Torch’s arm and ribs and knocking out the other two. He manages to get himself and co out of danger by melting through the floor.

Meanwhile, She-Hulk is carrying a big heavy as she’s been doing since the previous night and is caught unaware by Volcana who blasts her off her feet and then collapses the room on top of her.

Doctor Octopus knocks out Captain Marvel who is in the hot springs dome but gets chased away by Hawkeye, claiming that long-range firepower is his weakness.

I’m stunned at the implication that Doc Ock is one of Spider-Man’s most dangerous foes but could be scared off by Hawkeye while Spider-Man could pretty easily drop Clint’s ass. There’s some rock-paper-scissors nonsense at play here.

Spider-Man and Iron Man are also taken unawares by Ultron but manage to hide under some rubble.

Hulk leaps into the fray at Molecule Man and Doom but Cap convinces him to fall back to a defensible position.

The villains reconvene with all the captured villains freed except Enchantress (since she fucked off to have a chat with Thor) and the heroes scattered and buried under various rubbles. How the fortunes of Secret War turn.

Sure would have been nice if the X-Men had been around to help or if they mentioned they wouldn’t be. Sure would have been.

Doom: “We have accomplished much here today! And to finish it, we shall level this place so that no stone remains on stone!”

No wonder Mattel didn’t make a playset of this base! Dammit Doom, you’re ruining the merchandising!

Follow @essential-avengers​ for more of Secret Wars! At this same pace! Its sustainable! This is fine! Like and reblog too!

[pennamesmith]

Skeletor Lends a Hand

The support group acts out. Wrong Hordak gets a taste of his own medicine. More ‘Skeletor’ stories. Also, thank you to @ineffablelabpartners for the idea of “Princess Theatre feat. Wrong Hordak as Horde Prime.” See art for the opening scene by @cosmiquealiene here!

*

“I am Hordak!” Catra shouted. “And I defy your stupid face!”

She opened her hand. Wrong Hordak, wearing a mop on his head and with two extra eyes drawn haphazardly on his face, slumped to the ground.

“Oh! I am falling!” he wailed from the floor. “I have fallen! I am dead! Woe be to Horde Prime!” He splayed his limbs and stuck out his tongue for extra emphasis, making a few more death rattles as he did so.

It was drama therapy day in Wrong Hordak’s Ex-Horde support group.

Hordak, watching from the back of the small audience, hid his face in his hands and slouched as far down as he could in his chair. “This is the worst torture I have ever endured,” he whispered.

“Oh, but this is the best part!” Entrapta squeaked. She squeezed his arm and leaned into his shoulder.

The stage, such as it was, consisted of a marked-off portion of the floor, faced by the other group members, who mostly consisted of Entrapta and Hordak and about two dozen enraptured clones. Scorpia and Perfuma were by the door, working the lights.

Catra-as-Hordak continued to yell at her defeated enemy. “Ha! Serves you right, you creepy evil jerk! I bet you didn’t ‘see all’ that coming!”

“Catra! That’s not the line!” Adora hissed. She was kneeling on the ground a few feet away, pretending to be tied up. Her hair was bunched into two ponytails, and she had borrowed Entrapta’s welding mask.

“Ugh. Fine. Have it your way. I turned against my brother! What have I done?”

“Ca— I mean, Hordak!” Adora cried, standing up. Her acting was as wooden as ever, but she played the role seriously, holding Catra’s face tenderly in her hands. “It’s okay. You’re free now. You can be whoever you want to be.”

They kissed, passionately.

Hordak choked. “That did not happen!” he insisted, mortified.

“It would’ve been cute if it did, though,” Entrapta mused beside him.

The room erupted into applause. “Bravo!” one of the clones cried, wiping away a tear. “Bra-vah!”

The lights came up. Wrong Hordak jumped to his feet and bowed to the group. “Thank you, brothers! Thank you!” He straightened. “Now, consider this thought experiment: what would you have said to yourselves if you were the one to cast the villainous Horde Prime to his doom?”

The clones looked stricken. “I would have called myself a traitor!” one gasped.

“Worse than a traitor!” a second clone agreed. “A monster!”

“An abomination!”

“And yet,” Wrong Hordak said, still smiling, “Would you call the great Hordak any of these cruel things today?”

“Of course not!” a clone blurted. “He is a hero!”

“He turned against the false ruler! For love,” another added.

“He knows some things!”

A hushed murmur fell over the clones as realization dawned.

“So you see,” Wrong Hordak explained patiently, “Even though Horde Prime is dead, his lies can still live within us. We must learn to recognize Prime’s evil voice, and replace it with our own! Only then will he truly be defeated.”

As the clones discussed this new idea with excitement, practicing saying positive things to one another, Catra worked her way around to the back of the group and leaned on Hordak and Entrapta’s chairs.

“Enjoying the show?” she asked, smirking. “I think I make a pretty good you, Hordak.”

Hordak sank even further in his seat. “I fail to see the practical side of all this,” he grumbled.

“It’s very practical!” Entrapta protested. “Data shows that acting out roles can help us embrace new perspectives of ourselves and others.”

“Yeah,” Catra teased. “I find this exercise to be cathartic and entertaining, don’t you?”

“Attention, everyone!” Wrong Hordak announced, from the front of the room. “Next, Princesses Perfuma and Scorpia will perform their reenactment of ‘She-Ra and Her True Love Save the Heart of Etheria’!”

“You know what,” Catra said, “I just realized I have to go to the bathroom right now immediately.” She spun on her heel and speed-walked out of the room with a look of panic in her eyes.

“Perhaps I spoke too soon. This could be most amusing after all,” Hordak chuckled. He put his arm around Entrapta, and they settled in to watch the show.

*

Later, when the meeting had ended, Wrong Hordak busied himself with tidying up the room. Most of the attendees were still there, talking amongst themselves as they gradually filtered out the door. Entrapta and Hordak were chatting amiably with Catra and Adora by the snack table. Scorpia and Perfuma giggled to each other by the window and danced a few halting steps to music only they could hear. Wrong Hordak smiled.

“I am so proud of my brothers,” Wrong Hordak sighed happily. “They have learned so much!”

“Wonderfully horrible creatures!” his assistant piped up.

Wrong Hordak’s assistant was a robot, one of Horde Prime’s former drones that Entrapta had reprogrammed and given a voice. She called it ‘Skeletor.’

“We will form an alliance, but only until our task is complete!” Skeletor said.

“Indeed. Now then, my exalted brother, I have an important mission for you!” Wrong Hordak held out a broom and dustpan to Skeletor. The robot groused but took them and went to work anyway. As he did so, Wrong Hordak felt a hand tap him on the shoulder.

“Excuse me?”

Wrong Hordak turned around to find one of the other clones staring at him. “Oh! Greetings, brother.”

“Today was wonderful!” the clone complimented. “Your acting skills are marvelous. But I noticed you did not get a chance to berate Prime yourself.”

“No, of course not!” Wrong Hordak responded, smiling. “My purpose in this group is to help the others with their emotional journeys. Also, this exercise is about more than expressing anger. It is about self-actualization!”

“Well then, all the more reason for you to try it! You must find your own voice as well.” The clone pulled Skeletor away from sweeping the floor. “Here, practice on this drone! Drone, say something Horde Prime would say.”

“Er… You boob!” Skeletor tried.

The clone was unimpressed. “Something else.”

“The first one didn’t count,” Skeletor griped. “It was just practice. I was teasing the poor fool!”

“Then what would Horde Prime say? If he saw us making our own choices and thinking our own thoughts.”

Skeletor pondered this. After a moment, he shook his fists and shouted, “Get in line! I see you need a lesson in obedience!”

“Better,” the clone nodded, and then looked to Wrong Hordak. “And what would you say to that?”

Wrong Hordak hesitated. “I... I would say, I am no longer obedient to a tyrant!”

“Fool! You will serve my purposes!” Skeletor pressed.

“I will not!” Wrong Hordak pushed back, more confidently this time. “I serve only my friends.”

“Your friends only keep you around because it amuses them to have a pet!” Skeletor wheedled. “Be honest. Wouldn’t everyone be much better off if you had never come here?”

“That is not true!” Wrong Hordak said. “And, and even if it were, I am better for coming here! I want to be here! I am happy here! The light of this world is more fulfilling than Prime’s sickly light could ever hope to be!”

“Bravo!” the other clone applauded. “That’s the spirit!”

“Take a bow!” Skeletor cheered.

“Oh my,” Wrong Hordak breathed. “You were right, that was an exhilarating experience!”

“Exhilaration is my specialty,” the other clone boasted, proudly.

Wrong Hordak looked at the clone a bit more closely. “Are you new to our group?” he asked, curiously.

“Ah… Sort of? I’ve been coming for the past couple weeks, actually,” the clone admitted, and blinked. Sideways.

“Well, you will always be welcome and among friends here!” Wrong Hordak beamed. He gave a wink, and the air appeared to sparkle around him.

“O— Of course,” the clone stammered, seemingly taken off guard. “Excuse me, I must go now.” They turned and rushed away, hiding their face and making a noise that sounded a bit like an overheating radiator.

“What a nice person!” Wrong Hordak remarked, watching them go.

“Someone I could almost respect!” Skeletor agreed. “Meheheheheh.”

*

The next day, while Entrapta was working in her Bright Moon lab, a knock came on the door. She paused in her welding and went to open it, expecting Catra or Scorpia dropping by for a visit. Instead, she found a nervously fidgeting clone looking back at her.

“Oh. Hello. Can I help you?” Entrapta asked.

The clone quickly stepped inside, and then in a flash of dark light they weren’t a clone any more, but a lithe, svelte lizard person.

“I am having a crisis,” Double Trouble lamented, grabbing Entrapta by the shoulders. “And you’re the only one who can save me!”

“Oh! I see. You’re that shapeshifter!” Entrapta said. She blithely brushed Double Trouble’s hands away and sat back on her hair, looking contemplative. “Catra and Hordak told me about you.”

Double Trouble cringed. “They did? Well, that’s awkward.”

“...So, what can I do you for?” Entrapta pulled a pen and notepad out of her pocket and smiled expectantly.

“I— Really?” Double Trouble sat down on a piece of unused machinery. “Okay. In that case, it’s just… now that all the clones have discovered individuality, I think I’m beginning to see where you were coming from,” they admitted.

“I come from Dryl,” Entrapta supplied helpfully.

“That’s not what I...” Double Trouble sighed. “Look, can you just tell me what sort of things Wrong Hordak likes?”

Entrapta shrugged. “Cooking. Being dramatic. Rebelling. Why are you asking me?”

“I think I might actually be able to work with that,” Double Trouble muttered. “And I have to ask you because— because you’re the only person on the planet who knows how to romance one of these space bats.” They leaned forward. “Now dish.”

“What an unexpected pleasure!” Skeletor said. “I’ve waited a long time for this!”

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Alternate Future chapter 17: Together Forever (originally posted on July 5, 2021)

AN: Welcome back my loyal readers! Sorry to keep you all waiting these past few months, but I know the wait will really be worth it. The final two parts of Alternate Future might be some of my greatest writings yet, and I'm more than excited to share it all with you starting today. Now without further ado….

Synopsis: Steven tries to become Connie's official boyfriend.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Estelle as Garnet

Charlyne Yi as Ruby

Erica Luttrell as Sapphire

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl

Grace Rolek as Connie

Dee Bradley Baker as Lion

Kimberly Brooks as Cherry Quartz

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Featuring Ray Chase as George Ikari

--

Pearl stood in line at the Buddwick Public Library alongside many other parents and parental figures like her, waiting as a bearded, glasses-wearing Japanese-American man signed books at a table.

"Hey, you wouldn't happen to not be from around here, right?" a single dad standing behind Pearl asked her.

"Well, technically yes," Pearl informed the father. "I come from a planet of beings similar to myself who are all based around gemstones, which explains my appearance. Also, just last week I helped save your world from a sociopathic revolutionary, so you're welcome."

"You foreigners say the craziest things!" the father giggled in disbelief of Pearl, who just groaned flatly as the line began to pick up.

Eventually, Pearl was at the front of the line and now face to face with childcare author George Ikari, who had his fingers clasped together as he gazed at Pearl.

"Let me guess, you are here because of your own son, daughter, or whatever pronouns your child prefers to be dubbed?" George asked Pearl while he took out another copy of his book, titled "When Your Child Wants Time Apart", to sign for the Gem.

"Well, he's not really my son, but Steven is the closest thing my team, the Crystal Gems, have to one after his mother died giving birth to him." Pearl explained as George got to signing. "And that's not even getting into the fact that his mother was a former despotic alien conqueror who grew tired of her life and the constant neglect from her fellow despots, so she faked her death because of how much she valued your planet as part of a big war, then thousands of years later she met a rock star and fell in love with him before they consummated their relationship and she gave up her physical form to give birth to Steven."

George just stared in shock at Pearl's tale before she tried to continue. "And just last week, there was this other Gem with a vendetta against Steven's mother who tried to destroy the planet and kill us a-"

"Stop." George commanded Pearl with a raise of his hand before handing over the signed book. "Just take the book and leave. Your tales are holding up the line."

"What did I tell ya, foreigners say the craziest things!" the single father from before laughed.

"I'm deeply sorry Mr. Ikari, it's just that Steven has been going through some rough times lately." Pearl apologized to the author.

"I completely understand miss." George said while pulling out his phone to show Pearl a picture of his own son, a young man with scruffy brown hair, a white dress shirt, and a nervous expression on his face. "My son Shane has had his fair share of troubles ever since his mother died, troubles that he insisted on running away from rather than facing them maturely."

"Just like Steven." Pearl compared the two boys sympathetically. "I am deeply sorry for your loss sir."

"Thank you for your kindness." George smiled, putting away his phone. "The best thing I feel could work for a situation like this is to let things play out and discuss his problems when the time is right."

"Thank you very much George." Pearl thanked the author as she finally began to leave the library with her new book in hand. "Though I doubt that'll be of any use to Steven."

--

Not too far away from the library, Steven was sitting in his room talking to Connie on the phone while she was on her study break.

"Wow Connie, looks like you got all this college stuff figured out." Steven laughed with his dear human friend over his phone.

"I've got a whole plan figured out for early admission into the University of Jayhawk, but I'm still not sure about my major," Connie explained to Steven. "Maybe I should major in political science and minor in sociology, or perhaps the other way around."

"Did all our galactic adventures together get you interested in politics?" Steven asked.

"Maybe." Connie chuckled. "But I'm thinking more down to earth, as far as long-term careers go." As the two laughed at Connie's pun, the timer on her phone began to go off. "Wow, fifteen minutes went by pretty fast."

"Aw man, these study breaks are too short." Steven complained before he realized something. "Hey wait, you left a brochure at my place last time." He stated, pulling out a brochure for Connie's college of choice to show her. "You want it back?"

"It's alright Steven, I still have two more, and the Internet too." Connie answered smiling.

"Oh, right." Steven realized. "Well, call me when you still wanna hang out, okay?"

"You know I will, silly!" Connie beamed. "Okay, for real now, bye!"

After Connie ended the call, Steven turned over on his back and gazed at the brochure in his hands. "The University of Jayhawk, huh?" he muttered to himself. "And how far is that from here?" Steven then opened up the brochure to learn how far the distance between Beach City and the university's location in Kansas was. "Oh, that far."

Once again, Steven began to glow pink as he sadly sank into his bed, fretting over how little often he'd be able to see Connie regularly. Gazing at his rose-colored hand, he then started pondering on whether he should do something about this new condition, as he had been thinking about since the titanic battle with Black Rutile.

--

Soon, Steven had decided to get up off his bed and walk downstairs, to which he found Garnet standing in the living room dressed in a hat and kerchief. "Oh Garnet, you're still here?"

"Steven." Garnet greeted Steven tersely.

"I could really use your advice right now." Steven declared racing over to the fusion. "It's about-"

"Not right now Steven, I gotta split." Garnet cut Steven off before un-fusing into Ruby and Sapphire.

"I'm terribly sorry Steven, but I'm running late for my lecture on alternate timelines." Sapphire apologized while taking off the scoutmaster's hat and giving it to Ruby, along with a kiss on the cheek, before racing off to her lecture. "See you soon!"

"Sapphire might be going, but you still got good ol' Ruby to talk to." Ruby said to Steven as she went to fetch a backpack. "Let's walk and talk scout, I got things to do."

"Oh, okay." Steven agreed as he followed Ruby to the Warp Pad, and the two set off.

--

Later that day, Steven had joined Ruby's class, consisting of Onion, Zebra Jasper, and Little Larimar, as they strolled through the woods on a gorgeous afternoon. When the class got to a good stopping point near a stump, Ruby hopped up on the stump to speak. "Okay everyone, you remember what we learned last week, right?" she asked her students. "Well, today is the day! Brace yourselves, 'cause today we're sketching nature and the animals around us!"

Onion and his Gem classmates excitedly took out their notepads to draw on as Ruby continued. "Draw to your heart's content scouts!" Ruby declared. "Feel the beauty of everything around you, and you'll have the honor of receiving this Nature Sketching Badge!" She then presented a patch depicting a paint palette and brush in front of depictions of a wolf and a bird. "Got that? Now get to drawing!"

As soon as the three pupils left to go draw the beauty of nature around them, Ruby took it as her cue to jump down from the stump to talk with Steven. "So, what did you need Garnet for?"

"It's about Connie." Steven admitted to the small red Gem. "Every time I talk with her, I feel like she knows exactly what to do with her life, mostly thanks to her parents, and I don't. When we're together as Stevonnie, I feel so ready for anything, but on my own, I feel so lost. Just, what do I want with life?"

"That's tough Steven." Ruby declared sympathetically.

"Exactly!" Steven replied. "Connie is gonna go super far away for college, and I'm gonna be stuck here in Beach City where barely anything can go right for me nowadays and I don't know what to do about them! I want to be with Connie forever, like how you and Sapphire are basically together forever as Garnet!" That was when he came to a conclusion. "Wait, if I want to be together with Connie, then she's my future!"

Steven's revelation made Ruby super excited, and she began scuttling in place with stars in her eyes, her rapid footsteps creating a small fire beneath her feet. "STEVEN STEVEN STEVEN STEVEN STEVEN!" she cheered, but stopped short once she noticed the fire she created. "Oh my gosh, one sec!" Ruby quickly ran off and came back with a towel that she used to put it out. "Anyways, STEVEN, YOU GOTTA PROPOSE!"

"Wait, propose?!" Steven exclaimed in shock. "But, we're only teenagers, we can't get married yet! But then again…"

"Don't say you haven't thought of it!" Ruby added cheerfully. "Besides, aren't there couples in this country that get married at 18 or something?"

"Y-yeah, I thought of it." Steven began blushing, which he tried to hide within his jacket. "I mean, we just had this discussion."

"Well, what are you waiting for?!" Ruby yelled happily while jumping up and grabbing onto his head. "DO IT, DO IT, DO IT! DO IT LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!"

"Are you still really sure?" Steven asked the overly eager Gem. "As I said, Connie and I are still only teenagers."

"C'mon, we told you about how it worked for Sapphire and I." Ruby responded. "And if you're successful, you'll have the honor of receiving this!" She presented Steven with a badge depicting one figure popping the question to another. "The Proposal Badge! And if you're not so sure, well, seeing the future would be really helpful here."

Steven gasped, knowing just who Ruby was implying.

--

Far away from Ruby, Sapphire sat down with her class, made up of the Watermelon Tourmaline fusion, two of the Nephrites, Orange Spodumene, Cherry Quartz, and Angel Aura Quartz, while drawing lines in the sand with a stick.

"Okay class, let's begin our lesson." Sapphire announced to her students when she spotted Steven racing towards her with a big smile on his face. "Ah, Steven. I've been expecting you."

"Hi, Sapphire." Steven greeted Sapphire. "I'm sorry to interrupt your class, but I got big news! I've been thinking about my future with Connie lately, and a chat with Ruby convinced me that I should propose!"

"Wait, don't you have to wait until you're a grown-up to do that?" Cherry Quartz inquired with a raise of her hand.

"Let me guess, you're here because of my future vision?" Sapphire asked. "Let's run the numbers then." She then let Steven stand next to her before beginning to speak to her class. "Okay class, let's review what we've learned today." She began while drawing complex math equations in the sand. "Using the concepts we discussed so far, let us calculate the probability of Steven succeeding in asking Connie to marry him. Let's begin with the probability that she'll want to spend her life with someone, and then we'll multiply that by the differential factor in sociocultural marriage acceptance. Next, we multiply that by a possibly happy cohabitation, the factor of fear of engagement, the intensity of the love you share, and finally the robustness of your goals in life." As Sapphire finished her equation, she finally turned back to Steven. "Are you following so far, Steven?"

"Uh, maybe?" Steven answered as he stared at the equation Sapphire had jotted down for him in the sand, but it wasn't long before the ocean tides began to wash them away. "Oh no, your work!"

"And there we have it." Sapphire declared with a chuckle. "Don't you get it, Steven? My marriage to Ruby, our fusion as Garnet, it eluded my future vision for so long, defied the odds, and perhaps even changed the course of time itself!" she declared encouragingly. "We could just write equations in the sand all day, but then a wave of chance can come crashing in and wash everything away! Love is truly unquantifiable! Even with my gift of clairvoyance, I know far better than anyone that love can make the impossible possible! And that is why I say do it! Do it, Steven, just do it!"

"Yeah, you're right!" Steven began getting pumped up before turning to Sapphire's class. "Get one last good look at me, everyone, because after today you're gonna be calling me Steven Quartz Cutie Pie DeMayo Diamond Universe-Maheswaran!"

The class began cheering vibrantly, bringing a big smile to Steven's face as he finally realized what his future now held.

--

As the afternoon slowly began to give way to evening, Ruby and Sapphire reunited by rushing towards each other on the sand, excited about the big proposal.

"Steven told me first, and I led him to you!" Ruby cheered, spinning her little blue wife around by the waist.

"I told him to go for it!" Sapphire laughed. "Oh, it's going to be so wonderful!"

As the two fused back into Garnet, she stood still for a few moments, contemplating her components' decisions before coming to one of her own. "I take full responsibility for their actions." Just then, Garnet heard footsteps and found Pearl walking behind her, her pointy nose stuck in a book. "Pearl, I'm guessing you want to see me about the book you're reading."

"I was just thinking about calling up you and Amethyst," Pearl announced as her gaze turned from the pages to her leader. "Where's Steven?"

"Oh, nothing much," Garnet answered. "Just going to make a rash decision that'll emotionally damage him in the long run."

"Oh, that's ni-" Pearl began before she did a double-take. "WAIT, WHAT?!"

--

As for Steven, he was too busy getting ready for an evening with Connie without a care in the world, picking up a cake from Spacetries that said 'Together forever!' on it, buying some flowers from Crazy Lace Agate, lighting up the glow bracelet that brought him & Connie together to begin with and dressing up in some nice clothes. If all goes well, he would soon become Steven Quartz Cutie Pie DeMayo Diamond Universe-Maheswaran.

Meanwhile, at Connie's house, Connie kept on studying for the University of Jayhawk when she heard a roar coming from outside her window. Walking over to the window, she discovered Steven parked outside her home with Lion by his side.

"Evening Connie, how are you doing?" Steven asked his ladylove.

"Steven?" Connie replied. "What are you doing here, and why are you all dressed up like that?"

"You got a fifteen-minute study break in two minutes, right?" Steven inquired, gazing at his watch to check if his timing is correct.

"Whoa, spot-on!" Connie exclaimed, gazing at her phone to learn that he was indeed right. "So, what did you come here for?"

"You want to go for a walk with me?" Steven offered. "I'm sure you could use some fresh air."

"That's very sweet Steven." Connie smiled. "I'd really love to, but I-"

"Don't worry, we can take Lion, and then I'll bring you home in fifteen!" Steven declared with a thumbs up.

"Okay, let's do this!" Connie accepted the offer and left her room to meet Steven outside, taking a moment to tell her parents along the way. "Bye Mom and Dad, I'm spending my study break with Steven!"

Once Connie was out the door, she and Steven mounted on Lion's back and he ran away from the Maheswaran residence.

--

"Remember when we first met here?" Steven asked Connie as they dismounted from Lion and began walking down the beach.

"You mean when you tried riding a bike in the sand and then started running away screaming?" Connie replied with a chuckle.

"Yeah, I was trying to get your attention." Steven added.

"Last I remember, I was more focused on my book than your silly antics." Connie stated.

"Well, that all happened right here." Steven declared, gesturing to a picnic at the very spot where he and Connie first met all those years ago. "You like what I have here?"

"Steven!" Connie exclaimed in awe at the picnic set before them. "I don't know what to say! I also can't believe you still remember this exact spot!"

"I just remember it like it was yesterday!" Steven exclaimed just as eagerly before running over to a nearby rock to sit on.

"This is too cute." Connie squealed while blushing.

"And without further ado," Steven announced as he picked up a guitar to play while Connie sat down. "There's something very important that I'd like to tell you today." With that, he started strumming the guitar and began to sing. "I'd rather be tall, I'd rather be smart, I'd rather be sure you know I care." He sang for Connie. "Wherever you go, wherever you start, I'd rather be sure you know I'm there. I'd rather I always be a part of whatever you do. I'd rather be me, with you."

Although Connie was a little turned off by the deeper meaning of Steven's song, she chose to just keep those feelings hidden to not hurt Steven's while he continued singing. "Wherever we go, I already trust, I'd know what to do if it were us. I'd know what to say, I'd know how to be, I'd know your entire syllabus." Steven continued as the song reached its climax. "I can't think of any other thing in the world that I would rather do. If I could be, I'd rather be me with you."

"Oh Steven, that's so beautiful!" Connie applauded the love song. "If a little unsettling, but I'd rather not say it out loud because-" Steven then got down on one knee and presented him her old glow bracelet. "Huh?"

"Connie, will you marry me?" Steven popped the question at last.

"Come again?" Connie asked, completely taken off guard by such a proposal.

"Let's get married and live together as Stevonnie, just like Garnet!" Steven reiterated for his possible wife.

"Are you serious?" Connie chuckled at the marriage proposal. "I think we should talk about this first."

"You might think I'm being sentimental, but this makes sense!" Steven exclaimed. "I don't know what you'll be studying, but I'm sure Stevonnie will! We can go to Jayhawk together!"

"I really appreciate this little date, but come on! You're still young!" Connie said as she stood up. "And acting a little clingy, I might add." She added under her breath.

"What was that?" Steven asked Connie.

"Nothing!" Connie lied. "Like I said, we're still young. And even if some couples get married at like, eighteen, I don't think we're fit to be one of those."

"So, you don't want to be Stevonnie with me?" Steven asked despondently, but Connie was there to comfort him.

"Of course I'd want to be Stevonnie, but I'd like to be my own person too," Connie answered reassuringly. "You get that, right?"

"Yeah, but," Steven began while putting the bracelet away as Connie hugged him. "Is it a no?"

"I'd say it's not right now." Connie answered.

"But if we're going to spend our lives together, why didn't you say it now?" Steven kept on inquiring fretfully.

"We got plenty of time." Connie declared, moving on from hugging Steven to holding his hands. "Don't you worry."

"I'm not worried, honest." Steven tried correcting his best friend. "I'm just happy when I'm with you."

"I'm happy around you too." Connie replied. "It's just that-" Before Connie could finish, the alarm on her phone went off. "Oh snap, my alarm!" she yelped in realization while pulling her phone out. "Forget studying right now, I don't think it matters."

"But it does matter to you!" Steven yelled.

"And you're just as important!" Connie responded, beginning to notice Steven getting more stressed out.

"I'm fine, we can talk about it later." Steven began rapidly panting. "Look, Lion's still right there, you can go now."

"Are you sure Steven?" Connie wondered sympathetically. "You're looking a little on edge. Maybe I can hook you up with a good therapist. She's a good friend of my mom named Dr. Rebe-"

"I'm sure I'm fine." Steven cut Connie off. "Now go."

"Okay." Connie obliged before giving Steven a goodbye hug. "I'll call you again tomorrow at noon." She said before walking towards Lion to have him take her home.

"Have fun studying!" Steven continued putting up a happy front as he bid Connie farewell. But as soon as she was out of sight, that front completely fell. "Nobody I love ever wants to stay."

With that, Steven fell back-first to the sand and turned pink, the resulting impact ruining the nice picnic around him as he wallowed in a crater of his sadness, and stayed there for the rest of the day.

--

Many hours later, Steven kept on lying in the crater long into the night with tears in his eyes, and when he finally decided to get up, Garnet was there waiting for him with the picnic basket containing the cake still intact.

"I assume it didn't go well." Garnet theorized as she helped Steven up from the crater and began walking him home.

"I don't get it," Steven muttered cynically. "Ruby and Sapphire said I should go for it, and I did, but everything went wrong."

"I apologize on their behalf," Garnet stated. "You just can't trust love advice from hopeless romantics like those two."

"Then why didn't you stop me?" Steven asked the fusion.

"I couldn't see a future where you didn't try proposing to Connie," Garnet answered. "However, there were quite a few where after she said no, you forced her to fuse with you and subsequently went insane."

"Of course." Steven moaned. "Even in alternate timelines, nothing can ever go right for me."

"Don't be so hard on yourself." Garnet comforted her half-human ward with a hug to the side. "Your soulmate should be your complement, not a missing piece. Ruby and Sapphire may deeply love each other, but they still have their own thoughts, feelings, and lives." The pair soon reached the beach house and sat down on the steps together. "Whatever hole you have in your life Steven, I want you to know that Connie or Stevonnie might not fill it."

"It's just that you guys make it so easy!" Steven revealed as he took the basket from Garnet. "Can't believe I'm saying this, but it's kinda your fault for being so dang perfect!"

"I know you're upset Steven, and I take responsibility for your plight," Garnet apologized to Steven. "but blaming others as much as you blame yourself won't help."

"Then maybe shoving this adorable cake in my face will!" Steven declared as he opened the picnic basket to reveal that the cake was in pieces.

"It probably won't." Garnet deadpanned, but Steven didn't listen and started eating the broken cake anyways.

"Well, I'm still gonna do it!" Steven exclaimed, his mouth now full of cake.

"I know," Garnet added as she gazed up at the sky. However, what she didn't catch was a fly buzzing around her and Steven, and its green eyes started blinking.

--

"Ah, romance. So utterly futile." Black Rutile grimaced as she watched the live footage of Steven drowning his sorrows in cake through a hard light welding mask. "Still, all that trauma could be useful in the future."

As Black Rutile was spectating on Steven's pain, she was hard at work on her plans for revenge, using a blowtorch to put together the final touches on a special wrist-mounted device. Once she was done, the villainous Rutile aimed the device at a rock carved into the exact shape of White Diamond's gem and fired. The resulting blast destroyed the rock and left a massive cloud of ash where it once was, but she wasn't satisfied with the smattering of pebbles that once made up the rock.

"Hm, need to work on the disintegration aspect a bit more." Black Rutile pondered while retracting the welding mask into her visor and began going back to the drawing board.

--

Guess who's back? Back again? Black Rutile's back, she's no friend! And on that rather sad turned ominous note, we conclude the first chapter of Part 3. Now that we have Steven's romance issues out of the way, expect to see the following in the coming chapters, in no particular order.

Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl re-enact Ace Attorney while Steven becomes even more scarred for life.

Viva Los Diego! Lapis & Amethyst get involved with a James Bond parody, Garnet & Bismuth solve mysteries together with a police officer who's basically the Plumber from Ratchet and Clank, Pearl matches wits with a snooty film director who's like Michael Bay, David Cage, Neil Druckmann & Zack Snyder in one, and Peridot tries promoting her CPH reboot.

Steven hangs out with Spinel and plays basketball with Wolverine.

Peridot finally gets her own song.

Jasper finally gets her own song.

A certain Stevonnie-chasing jerk dares Steven to reform him.

And finally, Black Rutile plays a role in a certain event in Fragments, the final chapter of this part.

Have I gotten your interest yet? Good, cause strap in everyone, it's gonna be nuts.

[pigeontheoneandonly]

Lemongrass

So this was nominally supposed to be about a cooking lesson (loosely prompted by a post from @dr-ladybird), but it came out much more bittersweet and melancholy.

Thanks to @pushingsian for the beta!

NB: In my version of Mass Effect, Nathaly Shepard is vegetarian, and Kaidan Alenko's mother is Thai.

Lemongrass

The haunting quiet of a Canadian night along the Sunshine Coast still kept Shepard awake, even after two months.  She missed the endless creaking of the ship, the muffled voices coming through the hatches and decks, the hum of the drive core lulling her to sleep.  Everyone thought space was silent. She snorted and wrapped her arms around herself as she shivered on the porch, drawing a blanket close like a shawl.  This was silence, this… lonely wilderness.

Footsteps fell soft on the cabin’s wooden floor.  She glanced over her shoulder, and saw Kaidan padding barefoot to the door, still rubbing his eyes.  Her face broke into a smile despite herself, quiet, tired.  “Hey.”

 “It’s cold out here tonight.”  He rubbed his arms.  “Can’t sleep again?”

“You don’t need to get up,” she replied, sidestepping the question. 

He glanced out over the property, towards the coastline a half-acre away.  “It wasn’t this quiet when I bought it.”

This was where he’d sunk his L2 reparations, into this piece of earth, though the house came after the war.  His neighbors weren’t ever sitting in his lap, exactly, but a fair number either hadn’t survived or hadn’t returned.  But the lack of people wasn’t the problem.  “It’s a planet.  It’s never going to be—”

Shepard stopped herself just in time.  But her startled guilty glance, at the near slip, said it all anyway.  His shoulders sank.  “Come inside.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

He put his arm around her and gave her a tug.  “Come inside.”

The door swung shut.  The main room was cozy in a hand-made sort of way.  Kaidan’s mother had sent a seemingly endless stream of crocheted blankets, which now hung off every chair back and piled across the couch.  Shepard made the metal-framed furniture herself in their own backyard.  Kaidan spent his free hours scouring local extranet ads for books, and a coffee maker, lamps, cushions, anything anyone was selling or trading in the mostly cashless post-war economy.  Earth could barely manufacture essentials, much less everyday comforts.

Now he walked over to the small corner defining their kitchen and lit the stove.  She hiked one of those blankets higher on her shoulders.  “What are you doing?”

“You’ll sleep better with something warm in you.”

She joined him, putting her hand on his hip, leaning towards his ear.  “I can think of something warm you could put in me.”

That got her a quick snort of a laugh, as she hoped.  “That just wakes you up more.”

But his brown eyes sparkled in the dim light of the slumbering house. 

She heaved a sigh, but pushed a lock of red hair behind her ear, and switched gears.  “Need a hand?”

Flirtatious interest turned to surprise.  “You want to help me cook.”

“Come on.  I haven’t boiled a pot dry in weeks.”  A touch defensive, but hell, she had been trying.  It wasn’t her fault she never had reason or opportunity to learn to cook.  At this point, her molecular composition verged on 100% military-issue freeze pack meals and MREs.

“That’s true.”  He jerked his head at the cabinet.  “Find me the coconut milk, and the stock.”

Kaidan’s kitchen staples came as something of a surprise.  Beer and bacon she expected.  His mother’s influence, not so much.  Not that she knew a whole lot about Thai food to start with.  “Where do you get this stuff?”

“My mom is friendly with every southeast Asian family in Vancouver.”

“Sure.  But… citrus?”

“You’d be surprised how many people keep a tree in their condo.  I’m negotiating for one, but nobody wants to give it up.”

“It’s just as well.”  She pulled out a box.  “I’ve killed every houseplant I’ve ever had.”

“You’re doing all right with the herb garden.”  Kaidan said it with a straight face, despite them both knowing he did most of the work, especially after he caught her burying leftovers in the dirt to fertilize it.  Gently, he explained about compost, but it still seemed like a load of middle-man work to her.  He also explained about raccoons, which she had to admit had the weight of evidence behind it, in the holes and broken plants they left behind.  But Shepard had learned to water and prune, even fuss over the plants, here and there.  They seemed to enjoy the attention.

What was the other thing?  Stock.  Right.  She opened the fridge and pulled out a plastic jug, the remains of a giant batch Kaidan made last week from all their vegetable scraps.  It had been an experiment, but somehow, all of Kaidan’s kitchen experiments seemed to work out. 

“Put that in the pot,” he said, pointing. 

She complied, with one raised eyebrow.  “Don’t you think this burner is up a little high?”

“It needs to reduce.”  He gave the pot an expert swirl and set it back down.  “We still have mushrooms?”

“I think so.”  They’d stored up too much in the lower drawer.  She sorted through the items.  “What’re we making?”

“Soup.”  He declined to elaborate, and began to slice the mushrooms.  “We’ll also need lemongrass, cilantro, and some of those tiny peppers from outside.”

“You’ll send me out in this cold?” she griped, but she was already reaching for the scissors. 

He put down the knife.  “It’s summer, Nathaly. It’s almost ten degrees outside.  And the garden’s right beside the back door.”

“Anything south of twenty is fucking frigid.”  Pulling the blanket tighter, she headed out.

The moonlight gilded the leaves in silver as Shepard sorted through the huddled plants, trying not to drop the blanket.  Cilantro reminded her of home, the first home she ever had.  Her grandmother grew bales of it in window boxes.  Bending to cut some, she might have been six again, and smiled to herself in spite of the cold.  Or maybe because of it— the Arizona desert took on its own chill at night.

Lemongrass was more foreign.  Its pungency stabbed through the air as she cut it near the dirt, gathering several stalks.  A side of Kaidan she hadn’t known, like the cooking, until recently.  Sure he fixed a few meals in the apartment, back when the apartment was habitable.  Seeing him now, it was clear he’d grown up watching his mother, and absorbed everything she had to teach.  That added new depth to her understanding of the damage BAaT did to his family.  It was easy to sense, lurking there even today, in every interaction between mother and son, but harder to interpret.

When she was done, she returned to the kitchen, and found he’d added tofu, galangal (not ginger, she reminded herself, firmly), the aforementioned limes plus some kaffir lime leaves he’d obtained god-knew-how, and fish sauce to the waiting ingredients.  He smiled as he heard the door shut. 

“Here you are.”  She dumped her handful of fresh produce beside his pile. 

“These look great.  Take this.”  He handed her the spoon.

Shepard held it like a dead mouse.  “Wait a minute—”

He took the lemongrass to the sink.  “Nope. This time, you cook, and I help.  Don’t worry, I’ll walk you through it.”

Everything about this read imminent disaster.  Kaidan noticed her frown, and pushed her arm towards the pot.  “Add the coconut milk.”

It trickled in, aided by her tentative stirring.  She put the spoon down.  “Kaidan, look, cooking… My biggest accomplishment is getting a microwave burrito thawed the whole way through without drying it out.  I know you want to do this whole domestic thing—”

He picked it up and put it back in her hand.  “I have never known you to admit defeat on anything.  What’s going on?  Talk to me.”

She stared into the pot, expressionless face flickering in the burner’s flame. 

Kaidan tried another tact.  “You’re not sleeping.  You barely eat.”

“I…”  She let the spoon go, and slumped over the stove, tiredly.  “I didn’t expect winning to feel like this.”

His face softened.  “That’s because we didn’t win.  We just beat the reapers.”

She brushed some of the hair out of her eyes.  He rubbed her shoulders, left a kiss on her neck.  “Let’s just make soup, ok?  Lemongrass is next.  Smash it first.”

The damp stalks left small puddles on the board as she ran the knife through them, and then upended it and brought the butt of the handle down on each piece, thump thump.  Then the same to the peppers.  The motion was almost comforting; Kaidan made this soup a lot.

Kaidan slid sliced galangal into the pot.  “Your turn.”

Picking up the lemongrass with the blade, Shepard watched it disappear into the white broth, only to bob back up again, filmed with coconut milk.  Already leeching all its intensity and leaving the herb softer, milder, spent; having sprouted and fought through the dirt to the sun, grown tall and proud, only to give up all it made to this.  Because she declared that this was its purpose and its end.

A fistful of bright leaves fluttered down over the lemongrass pieces.  Shepard started.  Kaidan’s brow furrowed, and he touched her arm.  “You sure you’re ok?”

“Yeah,” she said, distantly.  “I’m just tired.”

He watched her a few moments too long for comfort.  “Even the squirrels know that.”

It caught her off guard and she laughed, as he clearly hoped she would.  Just one chuckle.  But it helped. 

“Tofu and mushrooms next,” he prompted.  Shepard gathered them up and dumped them in.

She just about remembered to stir it every so often as they juiced limes and chopped cilantro.  To her endless gratitude, Kaidan took it back to finish it when it came off the burner; she never could get the amount of fish sauce just right.  Somehow, he’d gotten the rice cooker going while she messed with the soup, too.  She liked dumping it all into her bowl with the soup, a practice that never failed to earn her a look of mock-disappointment that was half the reason she kept doing it.

They settled on the couch.  For a few minutes, they ate in the quiet dark of the cabin, lined in moonlight, wrapped in blankets.  Shepard had spent all her life in motion.  Now she was trying to learn how to live with stillness.

The soup-soaked rice felt good in her mouth, something she could bite down on.  Something solid and warm in her stomach.  She hadn’t realized exactly how cold she’d gotten, or how hungry; each spoonful brought a little more color into the room. 

Kaidan sipped at his own bowl, smaller than hers, with a slight smile.  “Feel better?”

She looked down into her nearly-empty bowl, and back up at him.  “How did you know?”

“You skipped dinner.  And lunch.”  His tone just a little too light.  “This isn’t easy for me either, but regularly crashing your blood sugar isn’t helping.”

There was nothing to say to that.  “I don’t know what to do with myself up here.”

“Yeah.” He set his food aside and inched closer to her, settling his arm around her waist.  “You’ve got a stack of requests piling up.”

“Busy work,” she scoffed.

“There’s never going to be another reaper war, and that’s a good thing.”  He gave her a squeeze.  “You’ll just have to subsist without the adrenaline and cortisol, high blood pressure, constant small injuries, and all those other things.”

“Tomorrow.”  It was too complicated to unpack right now.  She set the empty bowl aside.

“Tomorrow,” Kaidan agreed, and pulled her to her feet.  “Now, let’s sleep.”

[neocityfics]

2096: Zodiac

Chapter: Intro < ❝  Prologue ❞  > Chapter One

➥ Chapter List

Genre: Cyberpunk inspired, mafia-esque, not-so dystopian, angst

Pairing: Doctor! Taeyong x Reader [Sprinkle of other pairings tbd]

Summary: 2094, the disaster happens. The richest become richer with their reddened backs turned, the people around you growing more and more tired, and a certain Dr. Lee plans to change it all. Lucas unknowingly pulls you into the frenzy, and you become part of this confusing and painful process. You catch yourself floating between the conflict of twelve gangs and a world where circuits begin replacing flesh.

Warnings: Moderate cursing, death, heavy events similar to real world situations

A/N: Throughout the writing, there’ll be links (indicated by ▶ Ambience) for a more immersive experience. These are YouTube links, so it may be difficult to switch between YouTube and Tumblr (especially for those unable to have video pop-outs on mobile), so please keep this in mind. I’m also working on a Spotify playlist. I really hope you enjoy my first published piece!

▶ Ambience

The sea of neon purples, pinks, and blues drowned out whatever background activity filled the hustling life of the city. Light harshly touches the exterior of small shops endlessly lining the streets. Though full of living people, it always seemed a bit lonely. Everyone for themselves as it had been before the disaster happened, before life became even harder and resources scarce. Half the world is gone, but for whatever reason, humans continue to persevere. This strength is a unique feat, but it comes with consequences. With the remaining 3 billion people left on Earth, only the Eurasian continent remains the only habitable land thus forcing people to squeeze in tightly. It’s like this everywhere-- tiny housing, famines, and the overgrowing hunger to hold power and wealth much as we did before. The rich stay rich, the poor stay poor.

Life’s tough in Neostone. With hundreds of thousands of people and little food, restaurants struggle to keep open with enough to sell. Fresh water sources and land were replaced with tall housing structures and corporate buildings. Most have to work two or more jobs. Education is non-existent and relies on parents teaching kids different skills through child labor. Further industrialization in the little space the planet has left led to bouts of acid rain from overworked factories. The world’s leaders morph into the same guise: ties stained with blood, suits the product of cheap labor showed off status, and their white-gloved hands tightly gripped heavy silver suitcases. Corruption still plagues the broken systems that hang over society, sustained from before the disaster happened. It seems like we’ll never learn.

Sure, it’s difficult to get by day to day without much, yet the communities outside the wealthy rich businesses were tight-knit. Everyone knows each other’s names. People often trade food scraps for little luxuries to feel any ounce of happiness. Friends hang out near street food vendors where most people are, begging for any kind of calorie. While life in Neostone is tough, the citizens depend on each other for care, not anyone from above. 

I don’t think of it much-- how different life would be if the disaster didn’t happen, if the world had never been touched by so much chaos. I knew it’d be the same, that I’d end up still struggling to get from morning to morning. Even with the big drop in population, we live as sardines squished together under a layer of plastic that suffocates us. Nothing has changed. I lost everything.

Though the neons felt like home and they were all I’ve known for the past couple of years, I do remember who I was before this all went downhill. Fresh in college with a mind set on (major(s)/minor(s)), and although uncertain of the future, I was ready to break free from family and understand what it means to live a good life. Debt would hit me hard on my head but I was certain to find ways to pay it off without burdening others. Between jobs and school, I felt like there was a purpose for my movement, for my existence, to be a small gear of a clockwork world. For three years, I managed to get stuff done and become my own separate identity. I never felt more myself for the longest time. One more year to go, I said to myself as my third year comes to a close. But fourth year never came. It happened. The start of summer into my last year in college was the best time I’ve had in my life. During an internship in Japan, I’d gotten a handle of how it was in the real world as part of the workforce. A month into the most enjoyable moments of my life came the disaster.

▶ Ambience, Ambience

I watched the television screens throughout the subway, making my way to my 9am train when the static and distortions of color accompanied the shaking ground beneath me. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing as the news shifted to an emergency alert. All of a sudden, hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, building collapses, and tsunamis were destroying the western hemisphere. The disaster was inexplicable, the most spontaneous event in the history of Earth. I hid in the nearest shelter in Tokyo as realization hit how horrifying everything was. Buildings toppling left and right, people being crushed beneath the debris, splatters of fresh red on the broken bits of glass and metal heaps. That was a day of absolute terror. Within twenty-four hours, half the world was gone. My heart sank as the disasters settled throughout the world, and the news focused on the western hemisphere where I had lived most of my life. That part of the world was gone. My family and college friends were gone. 

And I was left alone in Japan.

But the world didn’t change. The same evil corporate heads enforced the same evil policies and practices. The same tired faces dragged their tired bodies until no end just to, at the bare minimum, survive. No matter what form the world took, this was our fate until we went extinct. The only thing that changed perhaps was how many of us were kept in that system, and that the system favoring the wealthy became stronger. So the cycle continues.

▶ Ambience

With the scraps of money I had left on my name and picking up little jobs, I was able to get into a micro apartment. The government was eager to take advantage of the situation and make just enough housing to keep people happy and off the streets, but also enough to ensure some people couldn’t get out of the vicious system so labor was cheap. My space is dingy at best and quite small, but it’s all the comfort I have. Not a day passes where I’m not grateful for a private place to sleep, do business, and let myself feel at ease. Others aren’t so lucky, sleeping behind their food and merchandise stalls or in the nooks and crannies of back alleys. Weeks passed into months where my body ached from overwork, the same for the people I’ve been surrounded with and worked alongside. It’s only been two years since everyone had to rebuild what’s been lost, but it looked only slightly different in Neostone where Tokyo had once been. Only the mega cities were somewhat unscathed by the disaster, and businesses collectively chipped in to remodel them. Rural and suburban areas were either flooded or full of toxic waste.

People from all races and backgrounds who survived into the aftermath of the disaster poured into the cities. I was kindly taken into the dangerous but welcoming community of downtown Neostone, where cooking and selling food in addition to helping at clinic became my new life. At the clinic, I met someone I familiarized myself with to be comfortable and close enough. Having someone around lifted up my motivation. Going by Lucas, a name he adopted to fit in with the rest of downtown Neostone, he worked assiduously the same shifts as me at Pearl Park Clinic. Besides weekends, Lucas and I leave for work together as he lives just a few rooms down in the complex. While working at the clinic down on East Row, he comes to visit for a bite at the street food stall that keeps me busy half the week. Throughout getting to know him within two years, he revealed he also lost family he was close with-- a younger brother and sister who by the sound of his stories were needy brats that he loved so much. It hurts to know they’re gone like my friends are. I was glad I could relate to him and also be someone to lean on. On a roller-coaster of life’s tests, Lucas and I know we have each other’s back.

▶ Ambience

Today was like most days, another Friday morning. The green flash of LED at 7:00am with a loud beeping, a quick splash of cold water against my face, clean clothes, and a quick bite of fruit. The same mindless routine guides me out of the door of the room and down the hall. From my room, 716, to Lucas’s room, 718, was only a few meters away thanks to the tiny size of rooms. I knock once, twice, then thrice, but no reply. Strange. I’m used to Lucas whipping the door wide open at the slightest sound of my footsteps to poke his head out and greet me loudly. Should I knock again? Call him? My hand gravitated towards the doorknob, uncertain if we’re on the kind of terms where I can barge in whenever. “Lucas,” I decide to start softly, “I’m here now, we can leave for the clinic.” No reply. Maybe I’ll text him. Unlocking my phone, a smile cracked on my face as a photo of Lucas and I hanging out with some other friends posed in front of our favorite ice cream shop flashed across the screen. No red numbered badge on the messaging app. Today feels a little bit unusual. Typically, he texts when he needs help or won’t be at work. Inhaling in, I choose to try the knob in which a turn and a push of the door unveils the dark, musky room. A room with no Lucas. Noticing the tension in my face and shoulders, I relax them and try not to think of anything bad that could happen to him. Maybe he needed to stop somewhere before going to work. Maybe he’s just out to get groceries and whatnot. Maybe he’s just busy doing something else. I trust he’ll get back to me soon, but the weird pit in my stomach bugged my thoughts.

Down the long winding halls, unlocking my phone seemed all I could do, the worry taking over. My pace quickened. It’s 8:00am, the clinic starts up at 9:00am. It’s a long walk through a rather sketchy part of downtown, but it's one I’ve mastered throughout the couple of years and certainly made friends in. Reaching the staircase, my breath was noticeably shallower. This was always the worst part. It took much time and energy just to get to the first floor. Upon stepping into the lobby, I swiftly pick up an umbrella from the community box set near the entrance and begin my path out. The clerk at the counter peaks over his rather raunchy motorcycle magazine, riddled with messy yellow text, and he subtly waves at me. I send the gesture back, taking my leave from the complex. Rain besets Neostone often, the overcast weather permitting low fog and grey clouds to lurk the bubble that is downtown. Chatter and noise blend together from all sides with the rushing waters eagerly greeting storm drains and early risers setting up their stores. In comparison to the staircase, the lengthy walk to the clinic is always a breeze, and it helps calm the nerves as I ready myself for a busier pace of day. Every five minutes, I unlocked my phone again to see if Lucas had contacted me. Still no sign of him.

▶ Ambience

After what seems like the longest walk of my life, some staff of the community medical clinic greet me and provide a list of my duties right away. 9:00am right on the dot. I take in what needs to get done, reading off the slightly crumpled paper between my fingers. Towel laundry… Disinfect beds in the North Wing… Prepare a warm epsom salt bath for patients in the East Wing… Always busy on Fridays when the work week is over and people live out their less-than-safe life decisions. Less work, more injuries, and more patients. A voice sharply interrupts, “Hey! Where’s Lucas? You two always arrive here together.” My heart sank. So he isn’t at work. Where could that man possibly be?

Tension grows but a sigh leaves my chest as I formulate some sort of response to the nurse, “He might be sick, I’m not sure where he went. Usually he tells me, but I’m sure he has his reasons.” The lady nodded and clicked her tongue as if irritated. A pause before I ask her, “Why, are we short-staffed today?” She gives a vexed nod again, taking her leave as another staff member urges her towards a patient. Stupid question. We always are understaffed. Located on the intersection of Bear Walk and Oak Lane as suspension railways weave between buildings, Pearl Park Medical Clinic threw itself into one of downtown’s busiest and most dangerous areas. Crimes being committed everyday that send people into the clinic, drunkards finding their way through the doors to spew anger uncalled for against the staff, and the homeless just asking for a pillow or blanket while they sleep outside as they’re reminded of the cold, hard pavement soaked with rain. Of course, we must treat everyone’s needs… and wants in some cases. Only a couple dozen of us work the two-floored piece of the tall establishment which also houses struggling law firms, compact grocery stores, beauty salons, and wireless carriers. This place is a mini mall, but not for the faint-of-heart mall goers. Murder, sabotage, and sickness run rampant. However, it’s the place Lucas and I call home. From Tuesday to Friday, from 9:00am to 8:00pm, my hands pruned from washing equipment and fabric constantly, legs moved to and from wing to wing to prepare stations, mind boggled by the surprising sights of Neostone’s everyday life. The dirty white walls, gowns, and noise make me feel rejuvenation each time I clock in for shifts. Home. A place of belonging. Everyone accepted me in, even as a seemingly insignificant part of the operation. For Lucas, he tells me so often as if I forget easily, it’s a dream come half true.

Lucas aspired to be a doctor. It was his lifelong desire to help others, fascinated by how many times the human body tested the limits and broke them, and how he could save someone’s life. That was his purpose. Unfortunately, he fell into the same boat as I did, not being able to finish college because of the disaster. As per hiring policy, Pearl Park requires employees to be degree holders in biology, chemistry, biochemistry, or any other related field. Lucas was studying biochemistry with a neuroscience minor. Beyond impressive were his grades by what Lucas boasts to me, though I can’t confirm since the disaster destroyed his documents. In his third year, he already started planning his senior capstone project with research on the nervous system of several types of animals. We bonded over doing labs, the silliest or most dreadful courses we sat through, and how the university dining food sucked and ripped us all off. But it was a waste. In this new society, formal higher education is not important. Some schooling still persists, but they’re limited to small, dusty, singular classrooms led by underpaid teachers. Families tend to force children into work as it’s deemed more beneficial in learning practical home economics rather than mathematical theories, ethics, physical sciences, and so much more. The mindset of the remaining world focused on survival versus getting jobs of higher pay and better conditions. No one could blame us when authority breaks and the top 1% fully turn their back on you. Despite being turned down for medical practice, Lucas still wholeheartedly accepted the situation and embraced helping out in the clinic. Here and there with a bit of discreteness, Lucas does patch up some patients with bandage, disinfect cuts, and give advice for those with physical pain. Might I add, he’s quite popular with the patients as well, handsome and charming as he is. I’ll admit to it, I’m jealous of how he lifts everyone up in the toughest hours. Shortly after he joined, my arrival a week later brought him joy knowing I was stuck in the same sticky situation he was in. His passion could be seen a mile away. On the other hand, I just needed this job to keep myself afloat like everyone else.

I snap back to reality when one of the doctors, Dr. Lee who made a beeline towards one of the stations, bumped my side. Asshole, I think to myself. He’s head of the Pearl Park operation, so I don’t feel the desire to cause trouble by reprimanding him. This job allows me to hang onto my existence and sanity with my apartment, I couldn’t afford to lose it. His voice booms suddenly, startling nearby staff, “Is Lucas not here? I need him to help.” His voice trails off and erupts again, “With surgery preparation on Monday,” he swivels his head to one of the lead nurses, “We’re doing a skin graft for a severely burned person.” Despite the cold aura, his face contorted with concern and urgency. The patients put complete faith into him as he’s been a well-known medical practitioner since before the disaster. My imagination briefly ponders the severity of the injury as if I haven’t seen my fair share of nasty burn wounds. Shoulders shudder for a moment, and then I begin towards the North Wing where my first duty awaits.

▶ Ambience

Phew. That might’ve been the longest shift of my life. All day, the image of Lucas constantly itched at the back of my mind. It was difficult to focus, but I managed to get through the hours until 8:00pm. With my feet aching from exhaustion and a slight headache from lack of food or water, I decide to pay a visit to my other favorite place: East Row’s finest Chinese street food, Electric Egg. In my innermost thoughts, I’d hope to see Lucas there, munching away on tea eggs. That was his go-to snack after shifts at the clinic. Being on your feet all day does quite a bit of damage and leaves the stomach to growl, to fight for a delicious energy replenishment. When I arrive, one of my coworkers greets me cheerfully, shouting and waving my name as I draw closer, much to my embarrassment. “Sicheng,” my voice laced with laughter, “how’s business!” Our most common exchange, with the most common reply. With a hardy laugh, he shoots back, “The everyday thing, you know. Slow.” Sicheng’s smile invites me towards the side of the stall as he prepares what he knows are my regular dishes of choice. “Xi’an pancake and sesame tang yuan, coming right up!” As if on cue, my stomach beams in excitement and I lay my hand on it to feel the grumble, making Sicheng to laugh. “How’s work by the way, and where’s Lucas? I have his tea eggs already here.” I glanced to the side of the cart Sicheng worked away at, and indeed Lucas’s tea eggs sat prettily in a mug, waiting to be eaten.

I sigh, turning Sicheng’s grin into a straight line. He’s observant and knows how to read the room well. After a pause to gather myself, I sit down on a stool facing Sicheng and begin to tell him my worries. “I’m not sure if maybe I’m overthinking this, but Lucas always tells me if he’s not feeling well enough to work or go out somewhere. But he was gone this morning, he wasn’t in his room when I left for the clinic. He didn’t show up to the shift, and so many bad things could’ve happened, especially in the area we’re in. I’ve been checking my phone the entire day, but I’ve gotten no resp--”

“My tea eggs! You’re the best Sicheng, I really needed this after a long day, oh my god. You guys have no idea, my belly’s been howling!”

I froze. I know that voice too damn well. Anger immediately boiled within me, and it burst like the hot oil that hits Sicheng’s arms as he cooked. “You. Piece. Of. Shit,” I whipped my entire self around to face the tall man who unsurprisingly turned out to be Lucas with his disheveled hair framing his stupid little face. “Did you not see your call log? It’s just me, me, me, me, me, and oh guess who… me!” The tone in my words frightened even me, even more so realizing both Lucas and Sicheng’s widened eyes. I earned some dirty looks from customers as well. Nevertheless, I was pissed.

Lucas’s heightened shoulders steadily fall. “Hey, I’m sorry… Something really urgent came up, and it’s very personal to me. I hope you understand. I should’ve told you as soon as it came up.” His jaw clenches, his fists tightening their grip against the counter as he sternly looks at me across the food stall. I shake my head and roll my eyes, gaining a scolding expression from Sicheng who’s confusion was written all over his face. Deep within me, I know Lucas is sincere.

I start back up, loosening my voice to become gentle, “Eat your tea eggs, please. They’re getting cold and Sicheng prepared them for you early.” Silence followed, then the chewing noises from Lucas hungrily devouring his food. Maybe today was a hard day by the looks of it. Lucas took care of his appearance, so it was a shock to see him in a seemingly vulnerable state. His eye bags seem bulging and darkened, a sign of a sleepless night. Unsure of what to think, I let go of my displeasure and chip away at my pancake and rice balls. After satisfying our hunger, Lucas and I bid Sicheng a goodbye and head back to our apartment complex. The walk is painfully awkward.

▶ Ambience

This feeling is nice. To have Lucas back as we go through our nightly routine of washing our faces and brushing our teeth in a tiny community bathroom. Our mannerisms seem slightly less stiff, and though minimal, it takes a huge weight off my shoulders. He’s back and I feel secure again. But he doesn’t bring up anything about earlier. I’m about to comment on his long-sleeved shirt as he’s the biggest heat anti in the world, refusing to wear anything that isn’t a muscle tee. But the rough emotions rattled us both, so I drop it from my list of questions to ask. We get ready for bed in silence, only starting to discuss things when we finish up and plop on the floor of my apartment. I tried to figure out if I was uncomfortable from the cold floor or for the conversation that might unfold. Since Lucas has been excruciatingly quiet, I take the initiative, “I sent so many messages and calls today. Do you know how worried I was?” Disappointment heavily coat my concerns. “This isn’t like you, I was seriously going to lose my mind. Please… can you tell me what’s going on?”

It pains me to see him looking like he’s kicked down again from having an already bad day, but I needed answers. He’s the person I trust the most in the life we have now. His chest inflated and quickly deflated. “I’m about to show you something. It might freak you out.” He tugs at the ribbed cuff of his left sleeve. A tattoo? Perhaps a little smiley face or some unconventional design placed oddly on his arm that he wanted to cover since we work at a clinic? Though tattoos are normalized on staff... Or an injury? Whatever it is, I just want to know whatever he’s hiding. “Promise me you won’t make a big commotion, I will explain.”

Without much thinking, I grow irritated at him for dragging this out, so I reach for the end of his shirt and pull it up quickly, unveiling the truth. My body and mind go rigid at the sight, unable to process whatever this… contraption was. “Lucas… what the hell is this,” I ask, alarmed, taking in the faintly glowing circuits and tiny sparks of blue electricity lighting up and down tubes that poke in and out of the machinery. From his shoulder down to his fingers, metals and screws and wires replace his flesh. After a long minute of examination and curiosity, I turn my attention back to Lucas’s face which expressed great worry, fear, and uncertainty. “Is this the reason you were gone today?” He gently shook my hand off and swiftly covered his arm with his shirt again. With a dejected look, he takes his eyes off mine and pins them on the dusty floorboards. His arm is no longer human.

“Dr. Lee from the clinic.”

[panickinganakin]

Third In Command Kylo Ren x Reader (AU)

A/N: This is chapter 7 of an ongoing series. If you would like to read previous chapters, you can find the masterlist here. I recommend reading previous parts as they are referenced in heavily in this chapter and you also may be a bit lost. 

okay this was kind of fun to write but I’m not great at action scenes so forgive me if it’s kinda choppy. Reader finally get’s her lightsaber!! 

Warnings: a few curse words, softy kylo, mentions of sex

Word Count: 2133

You woke up the next morning in Kylo’s bed alone. You weren’t surprised, he was usually up very early. You grinned, pulling the blanket over your head, Kylo Ren kissed you. He finally kissed you.

When you made your way to the main room he was sitting on the couch, reading on a datapad. “Good morning,” you said before crossing into the kitchen to find coffee.

“It’s good you’re awake, we a have a mission today. Jakku, we’re searching for something- a droid.” Kylo looked up at you, his mouth was a flat line, baring no expression really. Then, the corners of his mouth twitched up and he grinned, “How did you sleep?”

“I slept very well, thank you,” you grinned. You took the seat beside him, he laid his hand on your knee then leaned over to you, kissing your forehead.

“Go change, we need to leave soon.”

You nodded, getting up to go to your room. You looked in the mirror after you had changed into your black robes. You brushed your fingers through hair quickly before balling it into a bun. You let your fingers rest on the spot he kissed minutes ago, a tingling feeling still there.

It was strange, how connected you were to him. Like if someone tried to separate you, you would forget how to breathe. You hadn’t known him long, but you knew for sure that you existed to be by his side.

Kylo stood in the doorway of your room, watching you. “Ready, then?”

You crossed the distance that separated the two of you, laying a hand on his chest. “Don’t forget you promised me ice cream for today.”

“Do a good job on this mission and you can have whatever you like.”

You tilted your head up, a grin spreading across your face, “Whatever it is I want?”

A look you had never seen from Kylo consumed his face, “We can talk about that tonight.” 

You grinned, for the first time your thoughts drifted to a dark place. A place where Kylo's naked body lingered above yours, his breath shaky and soft moans escaping you. 

Kylo stared at you, eyes wide and mouth open. “We will definitely talk about it this later.” You giggled, knowing that he seen your thoughts. 

You followed behind him, still lost in your thoughts. Kylo was not your first kiss, a stormtrooper had been, many years ago. You wouldn’t consider yourself a person full affections but, you did have a fling once. All physical, no emotional connection. You of course, had also had sex before, only once, and it was awful. That’s what ended the whatever-the-hell-it-was with the trooper.

“Stop thinking,” he mumbled turning to you. “I don’t like to think about you like that, not if I’m not involved.” His mask distorted his voice, but his bitterness made your heart flutter, Kylo was jealous.

You nodded and continued to follow him, “Commander, good day, sir. Are we ready then?”

“Yes, we’ll be taking our own shuttle. I want only three to follow us, this mission shouldn’t be tedious, it’s just a droid. I want TIES standing by if anything goes south.”

“General Hux said-”

“I don’t care what Hux said, you listen to me.”

There wasn’t another word from the man and he scurried away, shouting commands to others around him. 

When Kylo had taken his seat he motioned for the seat beside him in the cockpit, “Sit.”

Being here reminded you of when you went to see Snoke, the way the stars looked as you passed through space. “It’s beautiful,” you breathed. Just like your trip before. “Do you ever get use to this? Seeing the galaxy like this?”

“I’ve seen a lot, between traveling here and there. I’ve learned to find beauty in other things,” when he said this, the leather gloved hand rested against your arm. Kylo was the king of cheesy at this point. Still, that didn’t stop the blush that formed on your face. 

“Oh get out. You only like me because the force told you too.”

Kylo reached up to his helmet, the air spewing from it as it released. He pulled it off and sat it down beside his seat. “Do you think that?”

Your face was even more red now, you could feel the color traveling down to your neck, “I don’t- uh- I don’t know. You said the force showed you me, showed you us I mean.”

“You are not as smart as I thought then. When I seen you on that bed, you were asleep. The way your hair decorated that pillow, I could see you then, it all made sense. I have sensed you from the day I joined the Order, I could just never find you.”

You were silent now, you knew he was being truthful. “So the night before we went to see the Supreme Leader, you told me you couldn’t see yourself returning without me, you meant that?” 

“What was it you said that day, all costs, right? I wasn’t going to leave without you.”

You felt speechless, you reached over for his hand, understanding what he meant. He said his loyalty was to Snoke, and he even told you that if he had to, he would kill you. Maybe he meant that part, maybe if Snoke made him kill you, he would. But you didn’t want to think about that now. In this moment, it was just the two of you. 

“Y/N, your mind is so loud. Just, believe in the order. Don’t think about what Snoke said. Just focus on our mission.”

The two of you stayed silent the rest of the flight, your eyes were huge when you landed. “Look at all this sand! This is Jakku?”

The land looked endless, it was breathtaking. So plain, but so powerful. You had never seen anything like it. “Did I say Jakku? No, I meant Tatooine.” Kylo had his helmet back on now, the stairs were lowering.

Your chest sank, Tatooine? He brought you here? Like you had asked? Before you could stop yourself you were running down the ramp, your legs gave out and you collapsed in the sand. You dug your fingers deep into the ground, it was gritty and warm. “This is where I’m from?”

“A bit rough, isn’t it?” He asked, joining you at your side, looking around. “Very dry.”

You laughed lightly, wiping a tear that had fallen from your eye. “What are we doing here?”

“It’s a pit stop, to look for the droid.”

“So we are going to Jakku?”

“Yes. But I wanted to let you see Tatooine, I thought you deserved it. You’ve been working very hard.”

“Can I bring some with me? The sand?” Your mind was scrambling, but you never wanted to forget this.

“Bring some sand?” His voice was confused.

You were rummaging through the ship now, looking for something that you could bring a piece of your home in. You spotted a small vial, normally used for taking blood. You popped the top off and ran back down the ramp. 

You dipped the vial down onto the ground carefully collecting the contents of the planet. Once it was full you screwed the lid back on and stood up, grabbing Kylo’s hand. “Thank you,” your voice was a whisper but you knew he would be able to tell how much you actually appreciated it. 

He laid a hand on your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb. “You don’t have to thank me.” He leaned down to leave a kiss on your forehead after he took his mask off and before tugging you back into the ship. “We need to leave.”

The flight to Jakku was uneventful, all you did was hold the vial of sand close to your chest. A piece of your home. And Kylo did it for you.

“We’re here. Stay close, pay attention. Our job is to locate a BB-8 droid and retrieve it. It has something we need.”

“What do we need?” you were walking behind him.

Kylo’s voice was deepened by the mask, “A map of sorts. We can talk about it later. Just stay focused now.”

You nodded, deciding it best to stay quiet. At the entrance of the ship you were met by three storm troopers, “Good evening Commander Ren.”

Kylo nodded and kept walking, the storm troopers fell in line behind the two of you. “Reports?”

“He was last seen with a scavenger sir, a female with brown hair. They were running with FN-2187.”

“Ah, the traitor. We will bring him back, the scavenger means nothing to us.”

You started to feel nauseous. Up until now, you had only trained in a padded room. And now, you were on your first real mission and still without a lightsaber. The only thing you had was small blaster the stormtrooper passed to you. You took it, lip quivering, you had never shot one of these. You were more afraid of hindering the mission now more than anything. 

Out of the corner of your eye you could see people running and yells coming from a cluster of stands. They were running through the market, “Kylo, look! They’re over there!”

The five of you began to run towards the three trying to escape, “They can’t go anywhere without a ship!” One of the stormtrooper’s yelled shooting the blaster. 

“They’ll find another way, don’t give them the chance!” you yelped. You were running the fastest, you were smaller and limber, able to cover ground quickly. “Kylo, give me a tracker?”

“A what?” he yelled activating his lightsaber. You guys were gaining ground fast but the three had found another ship now. It was huge, it looked broken down. But that didn’t mean it wouldn’t fly. You wouldn’t wait around to find out.

Kylo tossed you a small black box and you took off faster now. If you couldn’t stop them maybe you could at least make sure the order knew where they were and where they would be going.

You seen the droid falling behind the rest of the group, you pulled your blaster out. “Don’t destroy him!” one of the troopers yelled. 

You took a deep breath and aimed for the ground in front him, shooting the blaster. A screech came from the robot and dirt flew everywhere. “No!” you gritted your teeth. The robot continued to run across the sand. At least he wasn’t dead. 

The ship the group had escaped to began to roar to life. “Shit!” you cursed. 

The heat from the engines felt like they were going to burn your face but you persisted. Opening the black box that Kylo had given you, you bent your knees, preparing to jump after the ship that was now leaving the ground. You smacked it against the bottom and fell to the sand relieved to see it had stuck. 

You sighed, finally recovering oxygen in your lungs after it had all escaped when hitting the ground. “Send the TIES after them, we have them tracked but let’s see if we can stop this now.” Kylo said, he was close behind you.

One of the stormtroopers was in front of you now, offering his hand to help you up. You took it, pulling yourself from the ground. “Thanks,” you mumbled dusting the sand off your robes. The robes were tattered now, but you didn't mind, you felt as you did a good thing. 

“Good work, Commander.” he said before walking away. 

Did the storm trooper call you Commander? Had you heard that right?

“Nicely done, we will catch them. The TIES are going after them now, thanks to you we will have their whereabouts confirmed.” Kylo patted your shoulder. 

You nodded, suppressing a smile. Maybe. you were cut out for this work after all. You followed the group back to where the two ships had landed. 

“Commanders,” they said before nodding and parting to theirs. 

“Kylo, why do they keep calling me that?” you asked after the steps had shut behind the two of you. 

“Because, I’ve instructed them to. You are now third in command. Snoke, me then you.” 

Kylo was pulling a box out of a sealed door in the cock pit. “I’m w-what? What about H-Hux?”

“What about him? Hux doesn’t have the force, does he?” Kylo crossed the metal floor, holding the box in his arms. “Open this.” He instructed.

Your hands were shaky, what was this? Everything was hitting you at once, your role, your responsibility. How did one go from being a maid to third in command? You twisted the latch and the lid popped open. 

When you raised it, you were shocked to see a black handle with red designs adorned in silver as well. “This is for me?” You asked, you voice unsteady.

“You’ve earned it.” 

You picked it up, wrapping it up in your right hand. They weight was surprising, but it fit so well. You stepped back from Kylo, pressing the silver button. When the red blade activated you squealed with excitement. You had finally earned your lightsaber. 

Chapter Eight

tag list: @bensoloslover @crockgoblin69 @napping-is-my-favorite @shesakillerkween​ @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @stylishbauers​

[nikki-writes-stuff]

Trigger Happy - Poe Dameron x Reader

Summary: You first met Poe Dameron while you were staying on the Resistance base as a refugee. But after you grow closer to him and to the rebels you live alongside, you decide you want to become a fighter pilot and give back to the movement that saved your life. But for some reason, General Dameron refuses to let you put yourself in danger. 

A/N: This fic contains smut! 18+ only, please! 

“No.”

“But I haven’t even said anything yet.”

“I know. But I’m getting really efficient with this little exchange of ours. If you’re here to keep asking for the same thing you always do, then the answer is no.”

You huffed and set your hands on your hips, trying to fix the general with your most intense glare. But all he did was raise his eyebrows and copy your posture.

“General, we need fighter pilots,” you protested. “We might have beaten the First Order, but the Republic still has enemies out there, and-“

“Hold on a second, I’m sorry,” Poe interrupted, holding up one of his hands. “But why do you keep saying we? Our? This isn’t your fight. You are a refugee; you and your family have a home to get back to.”

“I’m not just a scared girl in need of rescue anymore, Poe! I want to fight! I want to be one of the ones to usher in the new Republic! The new galaxy! My family doesn’t need me. You do.”

“I don’t need a damn thing from you,” Poe shook his head. “Other than for you to stay safe. And smart. Jesus, (Y/N), you don’t realize what it’s like out there.”

“I would if you’d let me learn! I was flying for my parents’ shipping company by the time I was ten years old! I could fly any kind of ship you throw at me-“

“But what about if that ship is being fired at? What if someone shoots you down; what then?” Poe walked around his desk to stand in front of you, shoving one of his hands into his pocket as the other pointed an accusatory finger at you. “And, by the way, the idea of a ten year old flying a ship is terrifying, not to mention very illegal in-“

“We’re not here to talk about my borderline questionable childhood.”

“Borderline? You can’t be serious-“

“My point is,” you spoke up, “that I can do this. And you still haven’t told me why you won’t let me even try.”

Poe’s jaw twitched, and you saw the look in his eyes grow even darker as they stared at you for just a moment too long.

“My word is final,” he eventually growled, brushing past you towards the flap in his tent. “You can stay here on base if you want, but the only ship you’ll be getting on from here is one headed towards your home planet.”

With that, he left you standing there, awash in shame and anger. There were so many people from all walks of life within the ranks of the Resistance – younger than you, older than you, with families and friends stretching all across the galaxy. And they were fighting, laying down their lives for a good cause.

Why wouldn’t he let you be one of them?

____________________

When you’d first found yourself in the Resistance base on the jungle moon of Ajan Kloss, you and your family had just fled your planet after a particularly brutal attack made by the First Order. Your mother had been one of the fighters in the old Rebellion against the Empire, and she’d still had some connections which brought you to the Resistance.

At first, the base had seemed strange and scary to you – always busy, like a beehive, with so many people and ships crowding it. But as you’d recovered from the shock of having to run away from home, and as you’d come out of your shell, you started making more and more friends.

The closest one of all, though, was Poe Dameron.

Typically, the pilot would be out on missions anywhere from Coruscant to the Outer Rim, but during your first week on base, he’d been kept in the medical bay due to an injury to his arm. You’d met on your second day as a refugee in the mess hall. Or, rather, a particularly large tent that served as the mess hall.

You’d been picking at your bowl of porridge; your family was somewhere else on the compound, so you were on your own until dinner time while they figured out when it would be safe go back home.

“Mind if I sit here?”

You’d looked up to see the famous pilot smiling down at you. You’d heard tales about the best pilot in the Resistance, and you’d even seen him from far away before, but it was only when he was standing so close to you that you’d realized just how handsome he was.

“U-um, sure,” you stammered, gesturing for him to sit across from you.

“So, we have porridge for lunch today,” he sighed, sinking into the offered seat. “And dinner. And I’m willing to bet five credits we’ll have it for all three meals tomorrow.”

You smiled and shrugged, letting the blob you had on your spoon plop back down into your bowl.

“It’s not so bad,” you remarked. “Personally, I like foods that are…odorless, tasteless, and for the most part texture-less.”

“Man, this place must be paradise for you, then, huh?” he asked, grinning. You grinned back, delighted when you saw a diastema separating his front teeth. Coupled with the thick stubble on his cheeks, it made his smile decidedly unique and even more breathtaking.

“Well,” you replied, “where I ran away from, everything was on fire, so most places in the galaxy are paradise by comparison.”

He’d chuckled before reaching into the pocket of the navy blue jacket he was wearing.

“I bet I can spice it up even more for you,” he’d said, drawing out a small bottle filled with a thick brown liquid. “Do ya trust me?”

You’d furrowed your eyebrows, chuckling at the unexpected question.

“I mean, yeah,” you answered. “If I can’t trust the poster child of the Resistance, then who can I?”

His nose had wrinkled a little bit at the term “poster child”, but he’d just gone ahead and poured out a spoonful of the liquid into your porridge.

“Stir that around and tell me how it is,” he instructed. You watched your meal turn a light brown color as you complied, and when you brought a bit of it up to your lips, your eyes widened.

“What did you do to it?!” you demanded. “It tastes amazing now, like-“

“Cinnamon rolls?” he finished for you. “I picked up this stuff in a Corellian bakery once. It can make anything taste good. I always keep a bag full of it on base for anytime I find myself stuck here for an extended period of time.”  

“You’re a wise man,” you said, taking another bite of your now-delicious food.

The man sitting across from you gave a small bow at your praise before holding his hand out to you.

“Poe Dameron, by the way,” he introduced himself. “Although it sounds as if my reputation precedes me.”

You’d hurried to swallow down your porridge before shaking his hand, giving it a quick squeeze before letting your hand fall back down to the table. You told him your name in return and listened to him repeat it under his breath. Something about the way he said it made your cheeks heat up, and you ducked your head as you kept eating.

“My reputation doesn’t quite precede me yet,” you’d said. “But I’ll bet those same five credits you mentioned earlier that one day it will.”

After that, the two of you had been inseparable anytime he was on base. He would always find a way to search you out and spend time with you, either showing you his x-wing or taking you on a tour of the area around the encampment. He became your closest friend, and when General Organa passed away, the first person he’d gone to afterwards had been you.

You could still feel his arms around you if you looked back to that moment; you’d known how close he was to her, and so you’d said nothing as he buried his head in your shoulder. You’d only stroked his hair and swayed with him, letting him hold you and showing him that he wasn’t alone.

After that day, though, there had been a distinct change in your relationship. You’d only been on base for a few months, but you’d grown comfortable with Poe and your little routines with him. Now, though, with the weight of being a general on his shoulders and with so much planning to do, he didn’t have much time for you.

You’d busied yourself with helping the other members of the Resistance, though. After your first week on base, you’d quickly started to enjoy helping out with ship repairs. But after the Battle of Exogol and the defeat of the First (and Final) Order, you’d decided that you didn’t want to go home with your family.

The first time you’d asked Poe to become a fighter pilot, he’d laughed you off, thinking it was a joke. The second time, he’d also laughed, but there had been a steel to it. He’d scoffed at the idea and dismissed you, and from then on, it had become like a challenge to you.

Now, though, after his latest rejection, you stormed out of his tent, feeling the distinct sense of defeat at the finality of his words. Tears threatened to spill out of your eyes as you pushed past other Resistance members, but you didn’t stop even when the ones who you’d befriended tried to stop and ask you what was wrong.

You didn’t pause until you’d reached Poe’s x-wing. BB-8 was rolling around, fiddling with some wires on a nearby control panel, and he offered you a chipper beep in greeting.

“Hey, BB,” you sighed, kneeling down to give the droid a pat on the head. “Can I go in for a few minutes? I just need to think.”

The droid made a questioning beep, and you smiled weakly, trying to wipe away the tears still tracking down your face.

“No, I promise I’m not going anywhere with it. If I was gonna blow this popsicle stand, you know I’d have to take you with me.”

He made another beep before pushing something on the panel before him, and with a hiss the cockpit of the ship was opening.

“Thanks, buddy,” you murmured, patting him one more time before climbing up the ship.

As it turned out, ‘a few minutes’ lasted longer than you’d expected. You watched the sun as it sank over the horizon and stayed there in the pilot’s seat long after the stars came out. Your tears had dried a long time ago, but you didn’t want to go back to the tent you shared with your family just yet.

Soon enough, you were the last person in the shipyard; BB-8 had rolled away after you’d promised to close the cockpit on your way out. But you didn’t mind the solitude. If anything, you relished in the quiet of the night, with the only sounds coming from the insects and birds as they rustled about in the jungle.

With a sigh, you crawled out of the cockpit and laid down on the long nose of the ship, stretching out and looking up at the stars.

“Someday, I’ll see you up close,” you whispered to them. “One day I’ll fly amongst you.”

“You planning on stealing my x-wing?”

You sat up with a gasp, turning to your left to see Poe standing on the ground beside his ship. You scooted over when he started climbing up beside you, and soon enough your bodies were parallel as you both looked up at the night sky. The two of you were just barely able to fit beside each other on the ship’s nose; as it was, his entire right side was pressed up against your left. But despite your frustrations with him, you didn’t mind the nearness.

“BB-8 said you’d be up here,” Poe finally spoke. “I’d been looking for you for a good hour or so.”

“You know, I would say I’m sorry, but… I’m totally not.”

You heard him laugh quietly, and it was enough to pull a smile out of you. After that, the two of you were quiet for so long that you felt as if you would dose off beside him, but then he broke the silence once more.

“Do you know why I don’t want you out there fighting?” he asked. You’d never heard his voice sound so soft.

“I would if you just told me,” you fired back.

You turned your head but found Poe already watching you, and what you were going to say next died in your throat when you realized just how close you were. Your noses were almost touching as you lay there, and his eyes were half-lidded as they watched you.

“I think,” he whispered, “that you know why I don’t want you to fight.”

You bit your lip, feeling the breath escape out of your lungs as he stared at you. Gulping, you looked away, back at the stars, and tried to fight back the butterflies in your stomach.

“I don’t-“

His hand was on your cheek, tilting your face back to his, and before you could say anything else he was kissing you. His lips were everything you’d imagined – warm, dry, and so fucking soft. You let out a noise that was embarrassingly close to a moan when his tongue swiped at your lower lip, and you yielded to him without a second thought, letting his tongue dance against yours as a hand on your hip drew you closer to him.

Time stood still as the two of you kissed on his x-wing, and you felt as if your body was moving through syrup as he rolled on top of you to lay between your legs. You felt as if your body was on fire when you felt his heavy, hard length pressed against the apex of your thighs, and you moaned against when his hips rolled against yours.

“This is why,” he breathed, cupping your face while his hips kept grinding against you. “This is why I can’t let you fight, baby. I can’t lose you.”

You gripped his shoulders and flipped the two of you over, silencing Poe’s startled yelp with another kiss. You straddled him and kept the same pace his hips had set before, feeling him getting harder with every roll of your hips.

“You’re not going to lose me,” you whispered, your lips still brushing against his. “I’m not going to go anywhere, Poe. I’m not just asking to fight; I’m asking to be by your side. Throughout whatever may come our way.”

You pulled back to look down at him, feeling all of the emotions you’d tried to keep suppressed blooming inside of you. How had you not realized until now that you loved him? And how had you not known that he loved you just as much?

If the look on Poe’s face was anything to go by, he was having a similar internal debate, but then he rolled you over again, holding your wrists down as he pinned you with a glare.

“…You will have at least a month of training before you ever leave the atmosphere,” he asserted. “And before you even think about fighting anyone, you’ll have to prove to me that you’re ready to. Understood?”

A grin slowly overtook your face, and you hurried to agree with him, nodding vigorously.

“Yes! Yes, I promise, Poe, whatever you want. I know that I can do this.”

Poe eventually let his grip on your wrists loosen, and his eyes softened when he saw how excited you were. With a smile, he pushed some of your hair back behind your ear before cupping your cheek and kissing you once more.

His motions were no longer hurried while he kissed you, and his hips rocked as a slow, even pace now. His hands moved down your body, pushing beneath the thin shirt you were wearing to trail along your skin. You gasped when you felt his fingers move underneath your bra, but he swallowed the sound with another searing kiss as he started running his thumbs over your nipples.

You let your eyes close, arching up against him and feeling yourself getting wetter as he kept touching you. Your own hands pushed beneath his shirt, feeling the hard planes of his stomach and the smatter of hair descending down past his belt.

“You gotta tell me now if you want me to stop,” he rasped, starting to push your pants down your hips. “Because if you ask me a couple minutes from now, I don’t know if I’ll be able to.”

You pressed your thighs together upon hearing how rough his voice sounded; he was panting against you, his warm breath fanning out over your face while his fingers ran along the hem of your panties.

“Please, Poe,” you murmured, tugging at his belt. “I need you.”

The man above you smirked, never letting his eyes leave yours as he started pushing your panties down with your trousers.

“You need me, huh?” he repeated. “You’re gonna have to be more specific, baby.”

You narrowed your eyes, squirming when you felt the cold metal of the ship against your ass.

“I should’ve known you’d be cheeky in bed,” you lamented.

“We’re not technically in a bed.”

“You know what I mean!”

He chuckled, crawling down your body to press his lips against your inner thigh.

“You still haven’t told me what you ‘need’ me to do, sweetheart.”

You were about to tell him that you needed him to piss off, but then you felt him lean in and lick a stripe up your pussy, flicking his tongue right as he reached your clit. Your legs twitched at the sudden feeling and you moaned, fingers moving to his curly locks as he once more lapped at your clit.

“Fuck, I knew you’d taste good,” he sighed. “But don’t let me keep you from answering the question, babe. Tell me.” He slid down, letting his tongue drag against your entrance. “What you.” His tongue slipped inside of you, running up and down your inner walls a few times before he pulled back. “Need.”

You gasped when he began lapping at your clit again, spreading your wetness against it as you tried to come up with a coherent sentence.

“I-I need… I need you to fuck me,” you gasped. He began to move his tongue faster while a finger pressed inside of you, thrusting in time with the kitten licks he was giving your clit. “I want you inside of me, Poe.”

He groaned and pulled back, licking his lips obscenely as he crawled up your body. His eyes were on yours the entire time, dark and focused. You bit your lip and squirmed beneath him, trying to push your hips up into his.

“Someday I’m gonna lick that pussy until you beg me to stop,” he murmured, his lips trailing down your neck. “I’ll make you cum over and over again, till you can’t even remember your own name. But… I don’t think this is the time or place for that.”

He gestured around you, and suddenly you were aware of just how exposed the two of you were. There were tents just a couple hundred yards away, scattered around the outskirts of the shipyard, and here you were half-naked on top of Poe’s x-wing.

While you were looking around, making sure no one was up and about, you heard a belt buckle being unclasped, and when you turned back you saw Poe stroking his cock while he looked down at your body. His eyes were locked onto your pussy while your legs spread wider for him, and your heart beat faster at the look in them. He was watching you like you were the only other person in the world.

As he kissed you, you felt the head of his cock pressing against your entrance, and before you could brace yourself, he was pushing inside. You gasped, letting your head fall back against the ship with a metallic thunk.

He was thick, thicker than anything you’d felt before. But with how wet you were, how much you’d been imagining this, you didn’t feel any pain from the stretch. You let out a long, low moan, wrapping your arms around him and letting your nails dig into the material of his shirt.

“Fucking-“ Poe groaned, starting to roll his hips. “You feel so fucking incredible.”

You felt him brush against the spot inside of you that made your back arch and your toes curl, and you let out a yelp when he grabbed your hips and pulled your hips up to his.

“Shh!” Poe pressed his hand over your mouth, leaning down to murmur against your ear. “I know I’m good, baby, but you gotta be quiet. Can’t have the whole camp waking up, now can we?”

You whined and nodded, and once more his hips started moving. You bit down on your lip, trying to muffle your moans as he started moving again. But he was already starting out at a fast pace, not giving you any time to breathe before he was gritting his teeth and slamming into you.

Poe’s grunts were echoing in your ears, and his hands seemed to be everywhere all at once – cupping your cheek, squeezing your breasts, grabbing your hips. But when one of his fingers found its way to your clit, you gasped and moaned again. You were vaguely aware that you were crying out something that sounded like his name, but you were silenced when the hand that wasn’t rubbing your clit came down on your mouth.

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?” he grunted. “I’m just making you feel so good, aren’t I? Hm? My cock is gonna make this tight little pussy cum, isn’t it?”

You nodded deliriously; your brain was just a ball of white noise while he pounded into you. The cool morning air felt delicious against your heated, sweaty skin, and you let your eyes roll shut as you felt your pleasure starting to crest.

Your scream was muffled beneath Poe’s hand, and your legs wrapped around his waist tightly.

“Not yet, babygirl,” he huffed. “Not yet. Wait on me; I’m almost there.”

You groaned and let your hips rock up against his, not able to settle on where to put your hands –holding onto his shoulders, gripping his shirt, clawing at the metal beneath you. You finally settled on his hair, your fingers tangling into his curls, and he let out a groan when you tugged on his tresses.

“Fuck yeah, baby, keep pulling my hair like that,” he moaned. “Gets me so hot-“

Between the bucking of his hips and the sounds of his moans, you knew you wouldn’t last long. You pulled on his hair again, whining behind the hand he still had clamped over your mouth, and he nodded, looking right into your eyes.

“Ok, baby,” he panted. “Cum for me. Cum for me now, right fucking now-“

With a wail, you did just as he said. You clung to him as you felt your orgasm hit you like a freight train; stars exploded behind your eyelids, and the look of bliss, of absolute euphoria, on Poe’s face nearly sent you over the edge a second time.

You didn’t know how long the two of you laid there, tangled up in one another, but when he finally pulled away, his cum had dried on the inside of your thighs.

“That was perfect,” Poe whispered, pressing kisses to your cheek until you pulled away with a laugh. “You’re welcome.”

Your eyes widened and you shoved his chest, laughing incredulously.

“You’re not even going to let me bask in the afterglow, are you?” you chuckled, reaching down to fix your clothes. “Shoulda known.”

“Oh, c’mon. Was that or wasn’t that the best orgasm of your life?”

You rolled your eyes, pushing him off of you. With another laugh, he laid his side, still hovering over you. You smiled back at him, leaning in to kiss him again.

“So…” you said while you pulled away, “When do my lessons begin?”

Poe sighed and fixed his clothes, laying back down once his pants were firmly buckled around his waist.

“I was hoping you’d forget about that.”

“You’re good, Poe,” you smirked. “But not that good.”

“Damn.” He glanced over your face before sitting up. “How about tomorrow morning, Trigger Happy?”

You sat up, pecking his lips one more time.

“That can’t be my new nickname,” you said. “But yes, tomorrow does sound fantastic. Oh, by the way, who will be giving me my lessons?”

Poe smiled and pulled you against his side.

“The best in the entire Resistance.”

“…But Rey is busy with the new Jedi temple on Tatooine.”

You yelped when Poe punched you in the shoulder and tackled you, laying over you again and pressing his lips over your neck.

“It’s not Rey,” he growled, ignoring your laughter as he nibbled over your pulse point. “And you know it.”

“Ok, ok!” You pushed him back by his shoulders. “You are the best pilot in the Resistance, Mr. Poe Dameron.”

“Damn right I am. And don’t go forgetting it.”

[moonlightstars16]

Chapter 9 ~ Beneath The Surface

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next few days, Connie trained under Pearl. Learning everything she could about being a knight. Harnessing her skills with potential even she was surprised of having. However it didn't slip past her mind that she was training with Steven's second in command. He treated her a bit more like she had a higher ranking than other Pearls. But it didn't exclude the fact that she was still his second. Pearl seemed to be a bit cold on the outside, firm as well as intelligent. But she also had a gentler kindness to her deep down. She had seen it before a few times but that was rare. It was like Pearl had a wall between her feelings and everything else in the world.

"Pearl, if you know that what Steven does is wrong, why do you allow it to happen?" The question didn't seem to phase her, until Connie was on the floor, sword knocked out of hand.

"What did I say about your concentration?" Pearl stated a bit more firmly than usual. Connie quickly stood to her feet and picked up her sword. Immediately they were back combating one another. The question still lingered in her mind. No matter how hard she tried, those words flashed across her mind. Over and over as she found herself on the ground multiple times. "I supposed I assumed wrong about you." Pearl stated before putting her own sword back into the scabbard.

"No! I can do this!" Connie responded in determination, getting up once more and tightening her grip on her sword.

"You have no idea what I've been through." Pearl spoke making Connie's expression turn to confusion. "You don't understand what I had to do to make sure I am where I am now! To see the boy change into what he is! To see him suffer!" Her voice became louder and louder with every word. Connie then began to realize what should've been obvious.

Steven was not who he was now since birth, apparently. And with everything that has happened, Pearl was right. She could never even begin to understand why they stay by his side. Still he had done horrible things on his own and that didn't sit right. "To see him become someone so....monstrous..." Pearl turned around and sighed. "That will be all for today, return tomorrow for your next session." With that she disappeared into the shadows. Leaving Connie alone on the dimly lit area they just sparred upon. 'Is she hoping for him to be the boy he once was? To be there for when it happens?'

Though a part of this still didn't fit right, Connie let the matter aside for now. Focusing on the skills she obtained through her training. A routine of sorts developed from it. Each morning she would train with Pearl, then for the rest of the day she would help around the palace, then spent time reading either in the library or outside in the garden. At night she would write reports, the traditional way, for when she would visit back on earth. It was a nice routine that certainly distracted her between meetings.

Though her first meeting was beyond anxiety inducing, the rest were followed as she had originally thought it would be. Standing by Pearl and taking her notes. Though the other Diamonds were used to it, she could feel their gaze's as if throwing daggers at her back. Overtime she had build an immunity to the feeling, though remained cautious of it. And while White Diamond only appeared through her puppet, on a couple rare occasions afterwords, the feeling she gave Connie was the worst of them all. As if a ghost, the spirit of death itself and a cruel dictator wrapped up into one haunted her.

This made her focus more on what she was writing, her only distraction amongst everything around her. Perhaps that's all her activities were. Distractions. Couldn't bare to think about the arrangement she willing agreed too....twice over. That alone made her feel worse about the entire situation. Not only was she here voluntarily, but with a responsibility of protecting the entire human race. Whether liking it or not, it laid on her shoulders. Weighing her down into a deep pit she couldn't escape from.

Whenever those thoughts creeped into her mind during the day, she pushed them back. Reminding herself that it was for humanity. Fighting for them. If she were to back out, then every single human, soul, on the planet would cease to exist. And if his Zoo were to grow, then it was only a matter of time; before those who were added would loose there identity. She had to stand up for them. But the nights were the most hard to avoid. Dreams turned into nightmares until that was the only thing left. One particular night seemed the most cruel. Though she had dreamt the same thing over and over.

She was back on earth, journal in hand and ready to give her report. However there wasn't anyone around. No human in sight, no sounds of liveliness coming from the tiny city. Not even natural wildlife could be found. Still it seemed that didn't matter as she tugged her written report close to her. Suddenly a familiar yell echoed in the area. The only thing giving off a sound besides the wind. Running closer and closer, reaching over the top of the hill. Screaming as soon as her eyes landed on a horrible site.

"FATHER!!!!" Connie shouted, trying to reach his side. A pink lion stood on top of him. Claws almost digging into his flesh, just below his chin. Seeing that he was suffocating as lion bared his sharp fangs. He looked upon his daughter with tears in his eyes and a weak smile. She tried reaching out for him, but chains tied to her ankles and wrists pulled her back. Screaming as her heartbeat rang out faster and faster. The next thing she saw in her vision was red. Blood Red.

"NO!!!!!" A scream so loud it almost cracked the glass echoed across the room. She sat up quickly as if reaching out for someone. Breathing deeply as her eyes flickered around the room. Reminding herself where she was. Tears poured and stained her cheeks as she brought her knees to her chest, arms wrapped around herself and head down. Sobbing what felt like for an eternity.

"Father...I'm so sorry... please.. forgive me..." On earth he was safe, alive and hopefully surviving. But she would never see him again if she were to stay. Even if she could visit him on a new home planet, would he want to look upon the face of his own daughter? Soon to be married to a murderer for the rest of her life, even if it was to save everyone else's? Shame crept in as she sank down into the mattress.

So lost in her cries she barely noticed two firm, yet gentle, arms wrapping around her frame. Steven had sat right behind her, tenderly stroking through her hair and back. Pulling her close until she was crying into his chest. He had heard her screams and instantly was there to see if she was alright. Upon hearing her heart-wrenching sobs, something inside, compelled him to be there for her. Feeling her trying to calm herself, and failing as more tears fell from her eyes.

"Shhh" He whispered as he rested his head over hers. Within minutes Connie was calm again and had fallen asleep in his arms. He watched as she breathed in and out. Wondering if she ever realized he was there.  Her expression calm and serene. 'You truly are a mystery... What are you doing to me?'

'You're falling for her. We are falling for her. That's why you can hear me much more clearly now, don't you see?'

'What does that have to do with her being here?'

'Think, you allowed a connection within you. To connect to me. She is bringing out the better side of you, the goodness in you. The side of us we need. What we once had.'

'Be reasonable here!'

'Shh not so loud or you will wake her...'

Connie stirred in her sleep for a moment before returning to a peaceful state. A smile appeared on his face as he remembered she could probably hear them, though maybe it was different in her current state. The matter of how remained a mystery.

'See? You want to see her. Let alone being by her side.'

'So what if I am? Doesn't it mean that I'm just winning the bet?'

'Forget that stupid bet! It means nothing. We shouldn't have made it in the first place... Look if you truly want to win her heart, reveal to her what's inside of your's. Let her know the true you...the real us. You want to understand is that right?'

'You say all this as if we know the future.' Steven frowned burrowing his brows together for a moment.

'We know she would've said the same thing-'

'SHUT UP! I don't want to hear or think about this. I will win the bet and she will be mine regardless, so stop talking!' With that the voice went silent, his gem dimmed. Taking a deep breathe he laid Connie gently back in his bed. Lifting the covers over her shoulders, smiling as he watched over her sleeping form. Shaking his head he walked out of the room, carefully closing the door behind him. Sighing he ran his fingers through his hair and thought about what his gem half told him.

'If I am to win her heart...' He then began to think about what it more and more. Walking down the dimly lit hallways, he came up with an idea. He had once heard tales of how his father and mother met and fell in love. A swoon, a smile and she will be his forever. All he needed to do was recreate a romantic scene. His idea was simple but it would do the trick. Calling upon Pearl, she was there almost instantly.

"Yes Steven?"

"I want the main garden to be cleared up and looking a bit more tended too. By tomorrow night and no later."

"Of course, but may I ask why?" It was an awfully strange request. Especially since he had just put his own father in charge of the garden. Not wanting anything to do with it in the first place. The sudden interest was a bit odd, however she was used to him doing whatever he pleases. Even if it didn't make much sense to everyone else.

"Just be sure it gets done. Oh and make sure to inform Lapis to create a picnic supper at the pavilion." He added before walking away and leaving a very confused Pearl to complete his request.

'I won't loose this bet'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Okay Peridot all the books, with the authors last name, starting with F in the science fiction section are all completed!" Hand cupping the side of her cheek as she leaned over the railing and shouted down below. 'Until we have some more books showing up to add to it.'

"Affirmative Connie, Thank you!" A voice from down below a level replied as Peridot typed away on her keyboard. Connie walked down the steps feeling a bit tired from carrying books all over the place, for hours upon hours on end. She sat down on a chair, sighing deeply while looking around at the work before them.

"I wonder... Why does Steven have all this, what some might call, vintage, historical and almost renaissance like style? Especially since the technology around here is vastly superior in comparison." Her voice was quiet but was oh so heard.

"Well it's not one hundred percent accurate since all HomeWorld tech is incorporated within the architecture. But I suppose it's just a way to remind himself of what he was before." Bismuth stated putting the books she was carrying on the desk.

"I don't understand...." Turing to face her with a confused expression on her face.

"Well I mean he is part human. Growing up on earth for the first ten years of his life. He loved hearing about the past and soon developed a love for all this. It began with stuff from the 1980's and just continued from there. I suppose apart of him wants to keep that human connection alive."

"Even though he's willing to destroy the planet entirely instead of saving it." Her voice was a tad bitter. If he cared for certain human historical oddities, culture and such, why was he so willing on throwing away all that has evolved over time. Yes it was never perfect, but all that humanity strove for shouldn't be going to waste... However that was the reason why she was here, she supposed. To keep humanities spirit alive as well as making sure he held his end.

"Even so, with everything that happened to him, This scenery, this palace, it's like a visual sanctuary. But then again what do I know." Bismuth added laughing before taking another big stack of books in arms before heading upstairs. Connie smiled shaking her head to get rid of the bad thoughts. She did have a point, since knowing Steven pretty much all of her life. In fact the earthly mannerisms they all picked up made her giggle. If any gems deserved to be an honorary human, it would be them.

Sometime later Lapis soon came in bringing water and snacks for all of them, mostly for Connie's benefit. Within thirty seconds Connie had to refill her cup, dehydration wasn't a good idea when reorganizing books. Peridot took this opportunity to read aloud all the progress and what they still had to go. It seemed it was a never ending project but it was doable. Even though his highness kept adding to it; when he would have some scouts go along and grab a few oddities from years ago. Since being unable to do it himself because of the Diamonds.

She sighed and gripped the glass in hand, watching the water swirl around whilst getting lost in thought. He still was a tyrant of sorts, but she had gathered it wasn't just a random choice he made to do that day. Suddenly Bismuth looked up and frowned at what was ahead. Connie's eyes followed as she saw Lapis, carrying the tray back to the kitchen, stopping in her tracks.

In the doorway Jasper made eye contact with the blue gem, smirking whilst staring her down. Though her back was turned slightly, She could see Lapis' hands gripping the tray so tightly it was if she could snap it in half at any moment. Then, after a moment or two, Jasper walked away. Lapis stood still for a moment, head downwards briefly, before continuing to leave in the opposite direction.

It was apparent that something had happened between them. Even Peridot stopped giving her report the moment Jasper was in view. Bismuth sighed and slowly undid her fists she formed from earlier.

"That little minded gem should be careful about where to pick a fight."

"Why does she even care anymore? Lapis was right breaking it off in the first place. She should take a hint, seriously." Peridot added continuing to type on her tablet.

"Breaking it off?" Knowing it was wrong to pry, but once again her curiosity couldn't be helped. Beginning to think it was a problem. Still she couldn't help but be worried about her friend. Both gems before her looked at each other, as if contemplating to spill some sort of secret. It was Peridot who spoke first.

"It was because of Malachite."

"Peridot!" Bismuth stated slapping her upside the head.

"OW! Hey she might as well know!"

"Really if it's private I don't have to know. My curiosity got the better of me again, I'm afraid. I suppose it's just a reaction to worrying about a friend is all. But like I said if it's that personal, and by the sounds of it horrible too, then don't feel like you have to tell me." Connie lowered her hands after a sort of surrender gesture to let them know she didn't mind the secrecy. Sometimes personal events are secret for a reason. Peridot looked at Bismuth with puppy dog eyes, even though she had already made up her mind to tell a dark secret from the past.

"Horrible couldn't even begin to describe what had happened. It was about a year before the Diamonds came and took us all way..."

The Homeworld scouting/retrieval ship had crashed into the ground. The crystals gems used all there strength to bring it back to Earth, before having the chance to leave the atmosphere. Through all the debris and rubble, the crystal gems looked about to make sure everyone was okay. Though separated, Steven used his powers to create multiple bubbles to shield them from the impact. But before anyone could double check they were all here, a huge Homeworld gem sprung up from the ground, almost throwing a boulder that laid on top of her. Seeing the Crystal gems before her snapped something inside.

"You. Will. PAY!" Jasper shouted. Suddenly from the rubble right next to where Jasper came out of, was Lapis. Coughing she tried walking towards the others before Jasper caught her wrist, bringing her to her side.

"Let go of me!"

"Lapis, fuse with me! Or I will shatter you! And you're friends as well. But fuse with me, and I will spare them." Gasping the others tried to race towards her but stopped when they saw Jasper's hand on Lazuli's gemstone. "One more step, and she's gone!" Lapis looked at all the Crystal gems, landing on Steven and sighing. Knowing it was all a ruse. When suddenly an idea formed in her head.

"Wait!" She sighed and looked at Jasper, head held high. "I'll fuse with you."

And with that they formed the most horrific gem, Malachite.

However Lapis wasn't done with her. Using all the powers of the water, she chained them down on to the bottom of the sea and gained control over both. For six months they were trapped. Both fighting for control. Lapis's love for the Crystal Gems, her family, out-powered Jasper. Although she knew it wasn't going to last. She was becoming weaker and weaker.

Suddenly they were both enveloped in a bright flash of Pink light. A sharp shield slashing Malachite right down the middle. Causing her to be poofed as both gems fell to the ocean floor. Jasper was placed into a pink bubble, sent to the temple until the proper punishment could occur, and Lapis' cradled into Steven's, now glowing pink, arm.

"Wait, Steven saved her?" Bewilderment written clearly across her face.

"Well yes, that year he had discovered the Diamond like powers, inherited from his mother. But controlling them was a bit tough for him to do. Still once they discovered where they were hiding, that's when he first began to fully glow. A side affect to his powers you could say." Bismuth explained "He did care for her. Lapis was a good friend to him. In many strange ways they still are. That goes for all of us too I suppose." Connie watched as she shook her head from a past memory no doubt.

"Anyways, after that Lapis immediately went to recover. But that discorded fusion did more than took her strength, it affected her mentally. That process was long and much needed but it was worth it in the end. She soon returned to her normal self, but of course different, in a good way."

"But how did Jasper get out of the bubble?"

"Oh well that's thanks to the Diamonds." Peridot added in. "They took all the bubbles filled with corrupted and horrible gems and one by one unbubbled them. Though not all at once. In fact Jasper was apart of the first group of gems to reform back. And well after all Steven went through, they assigned her to be his solder.

Since he did defeat her, I calculated, was the reason why. And when we all were 'assigned' to be apart of Steven's "subjects", Lapis avoided Jasper like an earth plaque. But it wasn't long before Jasper begged her to reform Malachite again. It was pathetic, on her knees and grasping her hand in both of hers. Going on and on about how strong they were together, and blah blah blah."

"But I thought fusion between different gems was forbidden on HomeWorld?"

"Oh they are, but Jasper did have a tendency to break the rules. Malachite probably was the experience that affected her mindset about it."

"What did Lapis do? Surely not fuse with her again."

"Oh of course not. But after rejecting her, they almost got into a fight. Steven stood to the side and watched it all happen. When his shield stopped Jasper's punch, he walked up and pushed her back. Telling her to leave her alone or else. Jasper, full of fear in her eyes for a split second, obeyed and never spoke to Lapis again. Still though, that didn't stop the attempts to taunt her."

"That's horrible...."

"Another complicated event on the long similar thematic list here." Bismuth shrugged, getting up to continue the work load. Connie sat for a minute longer, taking everything in before getting back to work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The story went through her mind for the rest of her day. So much so she had a hard time writing her report of sorts. Specifically the part where Steven saved Lapis twice. If what Bismuth said was true, then there was a time where he wasn't who he was now. She knew that somewhat before, but it was becoming more and more real to her every passing moment. After everything with Pearl and now her friends, it was so much to take in. Setting down her pen, she sighed and stretched her arms out. Closing the journal and standing up when she heard a knock on her door. Opening it up she was surprised to see Steven there. A slight chill ran down her spine at the sight of him and yet she didn't falter.

"Am I disturbing you?" The question was quite out of the ordinary for him. She wondered if this was his old self reappearing for a moment. But she nodded slightly, answering the question.

"No, not at all."

"Then perhaps you would permit me to escort you for a walk in the courtyard?" With his hand extended forward slightly, something inside compelled her to accept. After all she had a million questions about him, perhaps it was time for answers.

With his hand wrapped around hers, they began to walk outside under the starry sky.

[summahsunlight]

This Way Became My Journey, Ch. 19

"Tuvok to Janeway."

The Vulcan's steady, strong voice cut through her slumber. Kathryn opened her eyes and immediately realized that sleeping on the chaise lounge had been a big mistake; her neck was aching terribly. Sitting up, she rubbed her eyes, and pressed her combadge. "Go ahead, Tuvok."

"The modifications are complete. We're ready to proceed into Rupor space on your orders, Captain."

Was it morning already? She felt like she had just laid down and had gotten no sleep at all. Stretching her neck, she told him, "I'm on my way. Hold our position until I get there."

"Understood, Captain. Tuvok out."

Kathryn climbed off of the chaise lounge and went into the bathroom to splash some cold water on her face. There would be no time for a shower today; a fresh uniform change, fixing of hair and makeup was all she had time for today. But being a mother she was used to not being able to shower in the morning. Speaking of the children, where are they? Kathryn peeked into the mirror, which gave her a clear view of the living room. Ava had moved from the chaise lounge sometime in the night and was now sprawled out on the sofa. Kathryn had no doubt that Michael was still sleeping peacefully in his room.

That won't last for long; I better take advantage of it. 

She quickly slipped out of the rumpled uniform that she had slept in, pulled on a fresh one, and shook her hair out, reaching for her brush. As she did so she heard the doors to the living room swish open and she smiled. "Morning, Tal."

The young Bajoran's face appeared in the mirror, watching as Janeway did her hair. "Good morning, Captain. Are the children still in bed?" A frustrated cry from the sofa indicated that Ava was no longer asleep. "I'll get her, Captain. Keep getting ready."

Kathryn watched in the mirror as Tal picked Ava off of the sofa and went to the dining area, picking out some ration pack that was suitable for children. After we retrieve Chakotay and Sarah, those damn replicators are getting fixed. Pinning the last bit of hair back into her bun, Kathryn touched up her make up, splashed on some perfume that had been her husband's favorite, and went out into the living room. A sleepy-eyed Michael had joined Tal and Ava at the table, and both children were looking at the ration packs pensively. Tal was telling them, quite animatedly, to just pretend that the ration packs were in fact, the best thing they had ever tasted before.

"The best thing Ava's ever tasted is that goopy cereal Mama gives her," Michael said, moving his fork about the dehydrated food. "I don't think this game is going to work, Tal."

"Oh come on," Tal interjected. "I did it this morning."

Michael looked up at his mother, pleading in his eyes. "Mama, do I really have to eat this?"

"I'm afraid honey, until the replicators are fixed, you do," Kathryn replied, leaning down to kiss the top of his dark hair. "I'll see you later."

She ruffled Ava's hair on the way out of the quarters and proceeded to the turbo lift. In a few short hours the nightmare of the past two days could be all over, she didn't know why that wasn't making her feel any better. Perhaps she was afraid of what they were going to find once they got back to that planetoid. Ensign Kim's long range sensor reports indicated that it was Class L, not the best place to try and survive for a few days while waiting to be rescued.

When the doors to the bridge swished open, Kvati, the engineer that had been assigned to lead the team modifying Voyager's shields greeted her, " Good morning, Captain Janeway, like we promised the modifications are complete. Voyager should be able to pass through Rupor space undetected for several hours."

Kathryn nodded her head in appreciation as she made her way to the command station. "Mister Paris, how far are we from the planetoid we tracked the shuttle too?"

"If we travel at warp six we could be there in two hours," Tom answered, sounding much more rested than the night before. "If we travel any faster than that we risk interfering with the shield modifications and being detected by our friends."

The Captain set her jaw. Two hours, it could all be over in two hours. "Mister Paris, set a course for the planetoid, warp six."

"Aye, Captain."

Harry Kim had been in engineering, helping B'Elanna maintain the constant change of shield variances to keep them hidden from the Rupor, when Captain Janeway had summoned him to the transporter room. Grabbing a tricorder and a phaser before he left, he told B'Elanna to wish them luck. She had responded that Klingons don't believe in luck, but offered it to him anyways.

He found Janeway already standing on the transporter pad, her own tricorder and phaser in her belt, Tuvok was standing with her. Harry bounded up onto the transporter pad, on the other side of the Captain, and she gave the transporter chief a small nod of her head. Soon he felt the familiar sensation of being broken down to the very last atom in his body. It tingled; he always had loved how it made him feel, like he was free to go anywhere he pleased.

A rocky and barren landscape soon materialized before him. Harry looked about, reaching for his tricorder and pulling it out of his belt. Opening it up he noticed a deep path cut through the rock and his tricorder was picking up traces of plasma and other alloys that were common in Starfleet vessels and shuttlecrafts. He swallowed, they had transported directly to the crash sight. "Captain, I'm not picking up any life signs," he said softly, his dark eyes searching the face of his commanding officer. Her deep blue eyes were conveying a deep sorrow, one that Harry had not seen in her before. She was on the verge of tears, he was sure of it, and he felt a strong urge to comfort her. But there were no comforting words, for he was in just as much pain.

"It's quite possible, Captain, that Commander Chakotay and Counselor Barrett abandoned the shuttle to look for supplies and a place to set up camp," Tuvok reasoned, breaking the silence. "We should have Voyager do a planet wide sweep for human life signs."

Janeway's only response was a curt nod of her head. She motioned for Harry to follow her while Tuvok made the arrangements with Voyager to scan the area for Chakotay and Sarah.

Harry walked a few meters with her before they came across the shuttle, crumpled against the cavern's walls. His heart sank at the sight. What are the chances that anyone could survive a crash like this? 

Janeway was picking her way through the open hatch, stepping over debris, scanning the area. Harry watched as her eyes took in the charred inner cabin, the smell of burnt plasma lingering in the chilled air. Suddenly she stopped and leaned down, brushing aside some ash to pick something up. When she straightened her form Harry could clearly see what she held in the palm of her hand; two Starfleet issued combadges. The sound of Tuvok approaching, his boots walking across the stone ground could be heard echoing off the walls, while Janeway ran her fingers absentmindedly over the two mangled badges.

"Voyager is scanning the area now, Captain," Tuvok stated, his eyes falling on the badges. The silence lingered, awkwardly, between the three officers.

And suddenly, Janeway's fingers closed in around the combadges, her eyes snapping up to meet Tuvok's. There was fire burning in them, Harry realized, the trace of the pain and sadness gone, replaced with a fury that was nothing like he had ever seen. "Get another team down here to search the area. Harry and I are going to go through this mess and see if we can piece together what, exactly happened."

With a nod of his head, Tuvok disappeared from the shuttle.

"Let's get to it, Ensign," Janeway said, turning about, venturing deeper into the destroyed shuttle.

Harry found that he had yet to learn how to bury his emotions like Janeway could and focus on the task at hand. His mind kept wandering to Sarah, how she had been becoming his friend, and now was added to the list of losses that Voyager had endured in just the three short weeks that they had been stranded out in the Delta Quadrant. Was this something that Janeway had learned over time, how to bury emotions? Was it the outcome of years in Starfleet? Or was it just a personality trait? Either way, Harry wished that he had the ability.

"Odd," Janeway's voice brought him out of his ponderings. He ventured into the shuttle to where she was standing, scanning the walls with her tricorder. "These conduits didn't explode because of the crash; they exploded because someone fired a Starfleet issued phaser at them to apparently catch the cabin on fire."

"So, the combadges were accidentally left behind?"

Janeway shook her head. "No, I think the combadges were left there as a ruse, to make the Rupor think the occupants in the shuttle had perished." She leaned down and started to scan the area where she had found the two badges. "Normally, there would be traces of human DNA, but I'm not picking any up where the badges where, meaning that Chakotay and Sarah weren't there when the conduits exploded."

Harry, feeling a new sense of hope, began to scan the rest of the cabin. Maybe the Commander and Counselor had survived this crash after all. Then his tricorder beeped, and he frowned, turning about to Janeway. "Captain, I think you should see this."

She picked her way through the ash towards him and began to scan the area that Harry was standing in front. With a frown she tapped her combadge. "Janeway to sickbay. Doctor, I'm sending up a piece of debris of the crash sight. I want you to confirm that it has either Commander Chakotay's or Counselor Barrett's DNA on it."

"Understood Captain," the Doctor's voice came over the comline. "I'll be ready for it."

Janeway took her tricorder and placed it on the piece of charred conduit that Harry had been scanning. She tapped her combadge again. "Voyager, lock onto my tricorder and beam it, along with the piece of conduit, directly to sickbay."

Harry heard someone answer, but his eyes were transfixed on the piece of conduit that disappeared in the transporter beam. It wouldn't take the Doctor long to determine if the traces of blood he had found on the debris were Chakotay's or Sarah's, and that would confirm, without a doubt that the Commander and Counselor had died in the crash, or been hunted down later. He felt something like a burning hatred swelling in his heart. The Rupor had murdered two officers, in cold blood. He didn't care if they had violated the aliens' twisted sense of authority. If Chakotay had been given the chance he surely would have retreated from Rupor space.

But the Commander apparently had not been given the chance. Him and Sarah had been shot down, tearing a path through thick rock until their shuttle came to a crumpled stop. If they had managed to even survive that crash, the Rupor must have gone after them, to finish the job. It didn't seem like them to just leave well enough alone.

Had their last few moments been terrifying? Painful? Or had they gone quickly? Harry prayed for the latter. He hated to think of his fellow officers, one whom he considered a friend, suffering a gruesome death.

"Tuvok to Janeway, Captain we've found something, it appears to be boot tracks leading up the mountain. Permission to continue?"

"Permission granted," Janeway answered, motioning for Harry to leave the shuttle with her. "Ensign Kim and I are transporting back to Voyager. Keep me informed, Commander, on your progress. Janeway out."

"The traces of blood on the conduit definitely belong to Counselor Barrett," the Doctor informed Janeway upon her return to Voyager. "But I can't tell you if she died in that shuttle or not."

Janeway rubbed her temples for a moment. "We didn't find any other traces of DNA, just one area with her blood. It could mean that they managed to get out of the shuttle before the conduits blew, or they made it look like the conduits had blown so the Rupor wouldn't come after them. Everything is up in the air right now Doctor."

"I wish I had more to tell you Captain."

The woman let out a frustrated sigh. It had been nearly thirty minutes since she had transported back to Voyager. She had heard nothing from Tuvok and the rescue team down on the planet's surface, and the Doctor's news wasn't what she had hoped to hear. "I'm going to assume that they're alive until otherwise notified, Doctor. I want you to be ready for causalities; who knows what kind of state we're going to find them in. The shuttle was a mess and after being stranded on a barren planet for two days their conditions may not be the best."

"Aye Captain," the Doctor replied. "I'll be ready."

"I'll be on the bridge," Janeway stated, making a quick exit out of sickbay and heading for the turbo lift. As she made her way to the safe, warm confines of the bridge, she had no way of knowing that her officers were fighting, at that moment, for their very lives.

The game of cat and mouse had been going on since Sarah had shaken him awake at dusk the previous day. Apparently their friends hadn't fallen for the destruction he had inflicted on the cabin to make it look like it had exploded in the crash. Chakotay had been forced to leave everything, but a tricorder, a canteen of water, and a blanket for Sarah, behind, and the two had left the tiny cave they had sought to seek shelter in. Now they were being stalked like prey, through the rocky terrain.

Chakotay hadn't actually seen the aliens, but he knew that they were there, the tricorder kept warning them of the life forms approaching. And every hour they seemed to gain on them. Sarah was loosing strength minute by minute, if she had even had any to begin with. For him, hypothermia had set in late that night as they braved the high winds at the peak of the mountain. Even the sunlight of the next day was doing very little to warm him up. If they didn't find a place to take shelter in that night, he was certain that they both were going to die out here. It didn't matter if Voyager was coming for them or not, they wouldn't survive long enough to see their crewmates.

"Chakotay, please," Sarah pleaded. "I need to stop. The pain…it hurts."

He shook his head, stubborn, determined to carry onward, even if his own legs were starting to give out. "We can't stop. Just grit your teeth and bear it. I promise, once we're back on Voyager I'll give you light duty shifts, but until then, just keep moving."

There was a tiny groan of protest, but she didn't say anything else. She probably didn't have the strength too. Since abandoning the shuttle the night before she had taken no medication to quell the pain or to stall the infection, both were running rampant through her body and here he was dragging her around over rough ground. I'm not making my case for First Officer of the Year, here, Chakotay thought with mild amusement, if there could be anything amusing about their current situation.

Sarah suddenly stumbled, taking Chakotay with her. "I…can't…Chakotay. I just can't…"

He felt a great weight tugging at his arm as Sarah sank to the ground. He was pulled down to his knees. For a moment he sat there, watching her as she stared up at the sky that was extremely reminiscent of her eyes.

"My father always made us lay out on cliffs to watch the clouds and stars when we were little. He liked to drag us on camping trip after camping trip; I hated every moment of it," she suddenly muttered. "Funny how the last thing I'm going to do is watch the sky."

Chakotay leaned over her and grasped onto her shoulders. "Don't you do this to me now! You're not through just yet, not if I have anything to say about it!"

She shook her head. "What's the point, Chakotay? Those aliens are only going to kill us. Let's consider it doing them a favor by dying before they get the chance."

"You are not going to die! Not when we've come this far!" Chakotay sucked in a large breath of air and tried to pull her back to her feet, but she was dead weight and he had very little strength left. With a huff he fell back onto his behind, the canteen rolling away from him, the tricorder smashing against the rock. He watched as Sarah's thick eyelashes soon closed over her eyes. It would only be a matter of time before she gave out, and he knew, that he wasn't going to be far behind her.

[gwentoryfics]

all the time in the world (yanan fluff)

Genre | Soulmates AU

Pairing | Yanan x Reader

Words | 3.5k

Summary | Ever since you were little, you’d heard about soulmates. You’d been told that there was one person, just a single soul out of the seven billion on the planet, that was meant to join with yours. But how long would it take for you to Connect?

Warnings | None. Just cute stuff. 😊

Note | Wrote this for a request! Also sorry this is not quite up to my usual standards, I blew through it kind of fast lol.

You would never forget the day it happened.

You were tucked away in the library, hunched over the table that sat next to the big window, trying desperately to complete your math homework. But your best friend, Jamie, wouldn’t stop laughing to herself.

“What’s so funny?” You tried not to sound irritated, but her giggles made it really hard for you to focus.

“Sorry,” she spoke quietly, trying to hide her smile. She pointed to her temple, indicating that she was Connecting with her soulmate. “Marcus is being inappropriate.”

“Could you ask him to leave you alone so we can study?”

“Yeah, of course.” She closed her eyes for a second as she concentrated on her telepathic message, and then she nodded. “Done. I told him I’d talk more later.”

“Thank you.” You returned to your math problem, trying not to make it obvious how much you’re struggling with algebra.

“Have you heard anything from your soulmate yet?” Jamie pried. “Do you still try to Connect with them?”

Disheartened, you frown. “Of course I do, but nothing yet. I don’t know if it’ll ever happen.” You send out messages every morning and every night, but you still haven’t managed to Connect. 

No one really knows how it works, only that one day the Connection is formed between you and your soulmate, and you’re able to communicate telepathically for the rest of your lives together. Most people start to connect around the time they hit puberty, but on rare occasions the Connection might not happen until you’re both in your thirties or forties.

After your sixteenth birthday a few months ago, you started to think you might be one of those rare cases. You absolutely hated the thought of having to wait that long to find your soulmate, but you didn’t really get a say in the matter. You just had to stay patient. 

You wanted to start dating, but everyone around you was already madly in love with their soulmate, which made it impossible to date casually. People thought dating was a waste of time, anyway, since you’d really just be killing time until your soulmate came around.

“Of course it’ll happen. It always does.” Jamie sounded so confident as she comforted you. “Just stay positive.”

With a curt nod, you tried to return to your homework. But now that she’s got you thinking about soulmates...

Are you any good at algebra? You try to Connect. If you are, I could really use your help.

And then you heard it. For the first time in your life, you heard a voice respond:

你在哪?

You completely froze up when you heard him. It was the most beautiful, melancholy voice you had ever heard. What did he just say? What language was that? Everyone always remembers their soulmate’s first words, but how could you ever remember the foreign sounds you just heard? 

“Oh my God…” You couldn’t believe it. “Oh my God I just- he just…”

“What?” Jamie looked up from her homework, wide-eyed. “What just happened?”

“I heard him!” You tried to keep your voice down, but that proved to be difficult when you were so full of such raw adrenaline. “There was a voice! He talked to me!”

“Oh my God, _____! What did he say?” Jamie completely lit up, just as ecstatic as you at the good news.

And then your heart sank. “I have no idea. It wasn’t English.”

“Oh,” she breathed, perplexed. “Well that’s… uncommon, but not unheard of. Do you know what it was? What did it sound like?”

“I don’t know… it might have been an Asian language? I’m not really sure. He sounded… sweet. He has a gentle voice.” You smiled just thinking about it. You needed to hear it again.

Hello? You feebly tried to respond. Can you hear me?

A few moments passed, and you were greeted with nothing but silence in return.

“I don’t think he can hear me. I think it was a fluke,” you confess. 

“That’s okay! This is still great news!” 

She was right. Your smile returned. “It is. It’s fantastic news!”

***

You started hearing from your soulmate multiple times a day. Most of the time it would be just a short phrase, but sometimes the sound of his voice could go on for minutes at a time. You wondered if he was venting to you, and you wished that you could be there for him. You came to love every message you received, even when it interfered with your school work.

Every time you heard him, you tried to respond. Sometimes it felt like you were having a conversation, but more often than not it was obvious that your Connection was one-sided. One-sided Connections were the most common way that Connections started, so you weren’t concerned about that part of it. Sometimes it could be months or years before your Connection fully formed, and that’s what bothered you most.

After taking some time to research Asian languages, you eventually decided that your soulmate must be communicating in Mandarin. Not exactly the easiest language for you to learn, unfortunately, but you’d gladly take on the challenge for your him. You didn’t even hesitate in deciding to learn the language.

Your parents were more than happy to enroll you in an online Mandarin language class, and you studied harder than you ever had in your life to learn your soulmate’s way of speaking. And little by little, you’re able to understand fragments of his messages.

...waiting patiently.

Today… got worse. …better soon.

Where are you?

When it was time to prepare for university, you easily decided to major in Mandarin with the goal of becoming a translator. Learning the language had become your whole life, and you found genuine joy in it. 

Fragments became sentences, and you’d lay awake at night just listening to his messages. He obviously had no idea that you lived in a different time zone, but you didn’t mind the late-night broadcasts.

Sometimes they were sweet…

I thought about you a lot today. I wonder if you can hear me. I want so badly to talk to you, but I’ll be patient. I wonder what you’re like, what makes you happy, what passions and interests you have. Recently I’ve been training to sing well. Maybe one day we’ll meet and I can sing for you.

Sometimes they were heartbreaking…

I miss my family. I knew that moving away would be hard, but I’m too busy to ever visit and all I want is to see my parents. I love them so much. I hope this message isn’t a burden for you.

And every night you tried to respond. You tried to tell him that you thought about him too, that you hoped he was doing alright. But he never seemed to hear.

Although you’d come to love the sound of his voice and every single message he sent, you couldn’t help but be frustrated by the lack of personal information he shared. He’d been communicating with you for years, but hadn’t so much as hinted at his name. You asked him for it constantly, even though he couldn’t hear you, and you hoped that one day he would tell you.

***

One morning, you were startled awake by his incredibly ecstatic voice. You couldn’t remember ever being forcefully woken up by him, but his voice was so loud, like he was shouting in your ear. 

We did it! We debuted! I just performed my first stage with my members and I am so proud of how far we’ve come! And it was so much fun. I can’t believe we finally made it! Even though we just started, we already have fans. I’m so happy and I just want to perform again!

It was as if the energy he gained from performing had transferred to you, and you suddenly felt wide awake. You jumped out of bed and tore into your roommate’s bedroom, excitedly shouting at her in Mandarin.

“Mingzhu! He’s a singer! That’s what he does! He’s a professional singer!”

Mingzhu screamed in fear at your loud entrance. “_____, I was sleeping! What the hell?”

You fell onto her bed. “This is great news! We can finally figure out who my soulmate is!”

You had met Mingzhu through your university’s Chinese Language and Culture Club, which you joined to help deepen your understanding of Mandarin. Mingzhu grew up in China and fluently spoke Mandarin, and it was hugely helpful to have someone she could practice speaking with. Plus, the two of you had a lot in common and you genuinely enjoyed her friendship.

She was still very connected to her Chinese roots and remained in tune with Asian pop culture. Because of that, you knew she’d be able to help you track down your soulmate, now that you had learned something important about him.

“I’m going to start doing some research to see who just debuted today. Can you help?” You held her hand tightly, hoping to all that is holy that she might agree.

With a sleepy roll of her eyes, she nodded. “Fine. Get me my laptop.”

***

It didn’t take long. You definitely started off on the wrong path by researching Chinese debuts - you didn’t realize that when he talked about moving away from his family, he meant that he moved out of the country. But with Mingzhu’s help, you finally found his group.

They were a ten person Korean boy group named Pentagon. And he was the only Chinese member, Yanan.

And he. Was. Beautiful.

The moment you saw his photo, your heart was overcome with love. He looked just as sweet as he always sounded in your head, with his dark hair, warm eyes, small nose, and gentle smile.

You found their debut performance online and you lost count of how many times you watched it. You were disappointed by Yanan’s lack of screentime, but whenever your gaze latched onto him, your smile could not be contained.

How could you have gotten so lucky?

Of course, there was just a small shred of doubt that it could really be him. It was kind of a guess, after all. But too much of Yanan’s story lined up with what your soulmate has told you, and it just felt so right when you looked at him. 

You spent the whole day watching any video content of him you could find, drowning yourself in the reality show that led to Pentagon’s debut. Of course, everything was in Korean instead of Mandarin, and you weren’t always able to find English subtitles, but it didn’t matter. You were in love.

At least, you were as in love as you could be with someone that you’ve never actually met. With someone who still doesn’t know you exist.

Well… there’s only one way to change that.

***

You took your seat in the middle of the crowd, anxious for Pentagon to come on stage for their Runaway comeback recording for Show Champion. It had been over a year since you discovered your soulmate’s identity, and in that time you managed to finish your schooling and save up enough money to fly to Korea. So there you were, in a completely new country, surrounded by people speaking a language that you barely understood, entirely unsure of how you’d get Yanan to notice you… You had no plan, but at the very least you were there. That’s the most you could do, since your Connection still hadn’t formed.

Maybe you could hang around Cube Entertainment’s building to see if you crossed paths? Or maybe you could find a way to sneak backstage?

No, all of those options would make you seem like a total creep, and that’s not the impression you want to make on your soulmate.

The more you thought about it, the more impossible it seemed that you could ever get to him without your Connection.

Yanan, I’m here. You tried desperately to Connect. Yanan, please hear me. Please. I’m here.

There was no response.

Maybe it was dumb of you to come the whole way to Korea before your Connection was complete.

But no matter - all of your worries get wiped away as soon as the boys step on stage.

Suddenly he’s there. He’s right there in front of you. Yanan, your pretty blonde boy, was right there, wearing his hoodie and ripped jeans and looking like a total boyfriend.

Your whole body got hot from head to toe, your fingertips started tingling, and you had the distinct feeling of completely losing your breath. In that moment, you didn’t know if you were feeling something magical because of your Connection or if you were just having a panic attack because everything was suddenly so real.

And then Yanan shook his hand at his side, as if he felt something too.

Yanan, I’m here! You tried again.

No reaction.

The music started. The boys performed. Yanan still didn’t get enough lines, but the ones he got were the most perfect lines in the whole song. His voice was beautiful as ever and he killed the choreography. As the song ended, you were on the verge of tears because of how overwhelmingly happy you felt.

You knew he wouldn’t hear you, but you just had to tell him. Yanan, you did amazingly! You danced so well and you sang beautifully. I am so proud of you and I LOVE YOU! Yanan, I love you!

All of the sudden, Yanan broke out of his ending pose, his calm, confident expression turning into one of total shock. 

And then he responded.

Soulmate? Are you there?

You couldn’t control the loud gasp that left your lungs. You can hear me? Yanan, I’m here! I’m in the audience, I’m here!

Yanan looked out over the crowd as if he could find you in the sea of people. Before he could spot you, they were ushered off stage and he was gone, but his voice remained inside your head. I’ll find you. Don’t leave. Please, don’t leave. I need to see you.

You responded. I won’t leave, Yanan. I’m here. Tell me where to find you.

I’ll get my manager to help. I can’t believe this! He sounded so excited. How did you know it was me? How long have you known?

I’ve known you for years, Yanan. You’ve been with me, talking to me for years without even knowing it.

He was quiet for a while, but you stayed patient. You had waited for this long, you can wait another few minutes. When he Connected again, he asked for your name and row number and said that a staff member would come to get you.

It was so unreal to think that it was actually happening. You were really Connected, and you were about to meet the man you’ve grown to love since you first heard his voice six years ago.

Just as he promised, a staff member came to collect you and bring you back to the waiting room. It was no secret that idols had soulmates too, and more often than not their soulmates were just regular people. Most of Pentagon had already publicly Connected, with only Yanan and Wooseok still waiting for their Connections to happen. You knew the fact that Yanan finally Connected would be reason for the rest of the group to celebrate, and you’d be more than welcome to come see all of them.

You were brought back to a small room that was far too full of people. The members were scattered throughout, carrying on while the makeup artists blotted their foreheads and noses.

The staff member that ushered you in pointed off to the left and said something in Korean that you didn’t quite understand, but you didn’t need to know her words. You followed her gesture and your gaze fell on your tall blonde soulmate, who had been watching you from the moment you entered the room.

“Yanan,” you breathed.

Your body grew warm and your fingers tingled again. He was so far away, and yet he was the closest he’d ever been. Your whole body was electric in his presence and you knew he felt the same way.

Is it you? His voice sounded in your head, his eyes widening as they fixated on you.

It’s me. Why were you frozen in place? Why couldn’t you seem to move when every cell in your body ached to touch him?

Yanan broke out of the spell first, a sudden smile coming to his lips as he approached you, laughing. And then he spoke to you out loud for the very first time. “I thought you’d be Chinese. Your Mandarin is very impressive.”

“Thank you.” You felt lightheaded as he reached a hand out for you, and you intertwined your fingers with his, the heat of your Connection flashing up your arm as you finally touched. “I learned it just for you.”

“Really?”

“Of course. All of the sudden I had this Chinese kid talking in my head. I had to figure out what he was saying.” You laughed, and Yanan’s sweet laughter mingled with yours. 

With his free hand, he touched your hair, your cheek bones, your jaw, your shoulder. Discovering you and cherishing you. Ingraining the image of his soulmate into the depths of his mind.

“You said you loved me. Is that true?” Yanan’s thumb swept across your cheek, his eyes searching your face.

“I love you with all of my heart, Yanan. I’ve loved you for years.” It was way too easy for you to confess. Being with him just felt so right. You had nothing to hide. “But don’t worry, I don’t expect you to love me right away. We’re soulmates, but love still takes time.”

By that point, the others in the room had started to notice what was going on, and they all stood in giddy anticipation. Kino shouted something in Korean, and Hui smacked his arm, lecturing him for whatever he said. Yanan’s face grew red and he responded in a flustered way.

“What did he say?” you asked. “I don’t know Korean.”

“You don’t?” He frowned, realizing that you really were as foreign as you appeared. “You’re not from here, are you.”

You shook your head. “I came from the other side of the world to see you. This is my first time in Korea.” 

“How long will you be here?”

“I can only stay for another week and a half. But we’ll work something out until I can move here.”

“You’d move here for me?” Yanan seemed a little bewildered yet concerned that you were so ready to uproot your life for him.

Sternly, you responded, “Of course! You’re my soulmate! I’d do anything for you.” 

Hongseok spoke up just then, and the other members laughed at his comment, Yanan included.

“What are they saying?” You smiled and squeezed his hand. “Tell me!”

“Hongseok said ‘They’re already bickering, they must really be soulmates.’” Yanan pulled you into an unexpected hug as he chuckled, and you eagerly wrapped your arms around his waist.

You listened to the gentle beating of his heart and truly felt like you were home. “And Kino? What did he say?” 

You could feel Yanan’s hesitance to respond, but he translates eventually. “He said, ‘Just kiss her already!’”

Your heart fluttered at the words, and you pulled away to look up at him. “Yeah, that would be nice.”

“You’re a little spitfire, aren’t you.” He cupped your face with a wild grin. “I like that.”

“You better.” You grinned, too. “You’re stuck with me, after all.”

With a chuckle, he leaned down and pressed his lips to yours, officially sealing your Connection. Warmth flowed through you and peaceful energy radiated from you, bathing the room in a calm aura. 

When you parted, he murmured, “I’m sorry that you had to wait for me for so long. I can’t wait to learn everything about you.”

“We’re in no rush. We have all the time in the world.”

All Rights Reserved © gwentoryfics. No translations, reposting, and/or modifying of the material is allowed without my direct permission.

[my-proof-is-you]

The Cost of Protection - Ch. 17

Summary: Pain, bruises, and cover-up. You had come to accept that this was now your life. He was cruel, but you had to stay with him. It was the only choice. That is, until you meet the green-eyed stranger that refuses to let it go… You have protected others for a long time. Can you learn to be the one to be protected? Can you trust two strangers that say they won’t let anything bad happen?

Warnings: Rape/Non-con; abuse

**I do not own any images or gifs

Masterlist

Dean

Dean was surprised at how well he had liked your family. Everyone was so easy to get along with. I may actually have Jeff to thank for that, he thought. Wasn’t too hard to seem like a better person than him.

Dean had enjoyed getting to see this type of family and even be a part of it for a while—talking cars with Jake, telling your dad about hunting, playing with the most adorable girls on the planet…it was nice.

Dean looked over at you in the passenger seat of the Impala. It was dark now, the two of you having stayed at Sarah’s till past the girls’ bedtimes. They were sad when they heard that you were leaving, but you had promised to come visit again soon.

When Dean looked at you, he noticed in the streetlights that you had been staring at him. “What?” He asked.

“Nothing,” you said, smiling. “Just…thank you. Thank you for coming with me today. I really don’t think I could have done it alone. And it was great seeing you get along with my family.”

"It was? Why?" Dean asked.

“It just…was.” Dean could have sworn he saw your cheeks redden in the dim streetlights.

He smiled, and reached his hand across the seat, palm up. You took it, which made his heart beat a little faster. He rubbed small circles on the top of your hand, enjoying the softness there. Soon, he felt your hand go limp and he turned to see you asleep with your head against the window. He smiled to himself.

God, she looks so perfect when she sleeps. I love her.

Dean's eyes widened at the words he said in his head. Love? I love her?

The more he thought about it, the more he knew it was true. He didn’t know how much longer he could wait to make you his.

As long as she needs, he thought to himself, and he knew he would wait forever if you asked him to.

You

You woke when Dean parked the car in the garage. You felt that you were still holding his hand and smiled before opening your eyes. You looked at Dean, who was watching you.

“Well good morning there, sleepyhead,” he said with a wink.

“Ha. Not exactly morning, but I’ll accept it.”

Dean smiled, and you watched him as he turned off the Impala and took the keys from the ignition. He had stubble lining his jaw again—your favorite. He had taken off his flannel shirt at your sister’s house after getting it dirty playing with the girls on the ground, leaving him in just a black v-neck. His muscles rippled out from the sleeves all the way down to his strong, calloused hands. His hair was perfectly tousled—though you knew he never actually did much to make it look like that.

Before you could really think about what you were doing, you climbed in Dean’s lap, straddling him. He looked up at you, surprised for a moment. Then lust filled his beautiful green eyes, turning them dark. You reached your hands up slowly to each side of his face, holding them there for just a moment. Dean hesitantly put his hands on your hips, his grip light.

Then you were kissing. Though, the word kissing doesn’t really do it justice. It was frantic—passionate. You moved your hands from his face, sliding them down his chest. His grip on your hips tightened, his hands squeezing and sliding around.

You slid your tongue around his bottom lip and he opened for you. Your tongues danced together wildly, and soon you were panting. You broke apart to catch your breath. Dean smiled, little lines appearing around his eyes.

“Should we take this inside?” You asked, still out of breath. Dean smiled again before opening the door to the Impala and carrying you inside. You giggled at his eagerness.

As Dean carried you down the hall, you passed the kitchen where you saw a flash of Sam standing there.

“About damn time,” he yelled after the two of you, chuckling.

“Shut up!” Dean yelled back, making you giggle again.

Dean took you to his room and kicked the door shut behind you. He bounced you down on the bed, climbing on it and coming up between your legs. Then his lips were on yours again, the same passion as before.

He moved his lips down your neck, lightly sucking and kissing as he went. He got to the swell of your breasts and you arched your back, wanting more. Dean slid his hand up your shirt and lightly cupped your breast over your bra, rubbing his thumb over your nipple. You reached down and pulled your shirt over your head before pulling his lips back to yours and wrapping your legs around him, enjoying the friction of his jeans against your center.

Dean reached behind you and unclasped your bra. He slid it down your arms, and you felt goosebumps raise on your skin from the chill of the air hitting your bare breasts.

“Shirt off,” you said hastily. Dean chucked and reached behind to pull off his shirt. He returned to you, putting his mouth on your nipple and sucking hard. You arched your back again, threading your hands in his hair.

“Dean,” you said, panting.

“I know, darlin’,” he said, running his hands down your abdomen. He dug his fingernails in just slightly, which drove you crazy. He backed himself down the bed until his face was in line with your center.

Dean reached for the button of your jeans, asking permission with his eyes. You nodded, biting your lip. He pulled your pants off in one quick motion.

Dean leaned back, taking your body in with lust in his eyes. “You, sweetheart, are perfection.”

You smiled, reaching up for him. You quickly pulled him down on the bed so you were on top of him.

“My turn,” you said, reaching for the button of his jeans. You pulled them off and saw his large cock straining against his boxers. You pulled his boxers down, taking him in your hand and slowly rubbing up and down.

“Fuck, darlin’,” he said, his eyes closing.

You sat back and pulled off your panties. “You clean?” You asked.

“Last I checked,” he said, watching your every move.

“Good. Cuz I am too, and I’m on the pill,” you said. With that, you quickly sank down on his length, shocking him with the movement.

“Y/N…oh God,” he said. You took a moment to adjust to his size before moving up and down. You placed your hands on his chest for balance, and he grasped your thighs with his large hands.

“Dean,” you panted, already feeling the pressure building. Dean flipped you over and began pounding into you, both of you needing release. He placed two fingers on your clit, rubbing and bringing you even closer to the edge. A string of obscenities fell from your lips and his as you came and your walls tightened around him. He came shortly after, his warmth filling you.

You both laid back on the bed, Dean opening his arm for you to snuggle in. You were both still panting, a sheen of sweat covering your bodies. You closed your eyes and reveled in the afterglow of your orgasm—the best one you’d ever had, you were pretty sure.

“That…was incredible,” Dean said, stroking your hair.

“Mmm,” you hummed, still unable to form words.

“You were something else,” he said, turning his head toward you. “Confident, sexy…and that body…”

You chuckled. “You aren’t so bad yourself, big boy,” you said in your most sultry voice. You both laughed. “Honestly, though, it’s never been like that before. Definitely not with Jeff, and not with anyone before him,” you said, your fingers drawing slow circles on his chest.

“I know what you mean. We better do it again, just to make sure it wasn’t a fluke,” Dean said, rolling over on top of you again, both of you giggling.

It wasn’t a fluke.

This fic: 

@my-soul-is-the-moon

@riverdalesserpent

@savannah0111

@sourwolf-sterek32

@justanotherwinchester

@obama-mia 

@samsgirl93

Forevers:

@malfoysqueen14

@divadinag

[lil-meow-meow-goes-rawr]

First Love

demon!yoongi

college student!jimin

3.4K

written for #BFR_FEST on twitter

masterlist

Yoongi was sent to the human realm for a mission. He was given only three rules: observe, report and keep his distance from the humans. It was all going well until the day he met Park Jimin and broke the most important of the three rules.

Yoongi sank down into the chair at his desk. Tonight was the last night he would be sitting there as in just a few hours his superior would be by to pick him up and take him home. Yoongi wasn’t sure whether he was happy about that or not. Of course he didn’t have a choice. He was nowhere near a top tier demon. The only reason he had been chosen for this mission was because of his uncanny resemblance to the humans. Blending in with the rest of them had been no issue for him.

He wasn’t even briefed on what the mission was for. The only rules he had been given were to observe and report. He’d been given a special journal to document everything. No relations with the humans were meant to be made. Interacting was to be kept to a minimum. At the time, the mission had seemed so simple.

Yoongi ran a finger down the spine of his personal log with a small smile. His own personal account of the human world. The one not to be seen by the command. The mission no longer seemed so easy.

With a sigh of resignation, Yoongi quickly jotted down the last of his daily reports. Again, he found himself wondering what they were planning on using these reports for. Were they simply conducting more research? Was this an experiment of some sort? Yoongi wasn’t sure he wanted to know. As long as no harm came to the humans, he didn’t really care.

After finishing, he shut the journal for the last time and grabbed his personal journal to write down his own, unfiltered thoughts. He skimmed through the pages briefly. Some were written neatly and had little doodles along the pages. Other days, his handwriting was rough and sloppy. The words on the page even more so. Yoongi had experienced so many new emotions on this planet. Emotions he hadn’t been aware he could even feel, and it was all due to one certain human. Yoongi had broken the most important rule the command had given him, the day he met Park Jimin.

He smiled softly to himself as the memories flooded his mind and he quickly flipped to the page in which he’d recorded the beginning of it all. Their meeting had been by chance. The friendship that formed had been unexpected.

November 14

I have come to learn over the past two weeks that humans are social creatures, but only with the other humans they know. Not many will interact with strangers on the street. Maintaining distance hasn’t been a problem. At least not until today. Today I met someone who seems different from the rest of the humans. Perhaps a new breed? If so, he is a rare breed indeed.

As I have every morning, I went to the coffee shop across from my apartment. It is small and not many people go in, but they serve the best coffee. Since most humans appear to have a similar routine every morning before they leave for their place of work, I have also made this into my routine. Today however, was a bit different. After paying for and receiving my usual order of a hot Americano and Cinnamon bun, I turned to leave. There was another person standing directly behind me in line. I wasn't expecting such a close encounter and accidentally walked into him, the coffee I had just bought ending up soaked across his white shirt. I apologized profusely, expecting a backlash of angry words. The reaction which I deserved for my inconsiderate actions. Instead, the stranger smiled kindly and bowed his head as if apologizing to me.

“No, no. I should be the one apologizing. I shouldn’t have been standing so closely.” He told me.

I admit I was a bit lost for words. His reaction was unlike any I had ever experienced during my stay in the human world. Not only was his kindness unexpected, but so was his beauty. I had yet to see another human who was as beautiful as this one was. He seemed to have a glowing aura around him. His dark hair was soft and a bit curly, but it held nothing to how soft his gaze was. Those brown eyes were kinder than I had ever seen before.

After a moment of silence, I was still struggling to form words that would have been appropriate. The human broke the silence instead. He shyly apologized once more before asking if he could buy me another coffee as he was now wearing mine. I quickly refused, offering to buy him a drink instead to make up for ruining his shirt. I can still hear the sound of his laughter as he looked down at his once white shirt. In the end, we paid for each other’s coffees and we parted ways. I now regret not asking for his name. I may never see him again but his kindness will never be forgotten.

Yoongi laughed at his own antics. The day had been a memorable one indeed. He skipped ahead a few pages to the 18th which was the next time he had seen Park Jimin.

November 18

I will admit I had begun to lose hope over ever seeing the boy again. Every day I have continued to go back to the small coffee shop as is my routine but he has not returned. Humans are not capable of teleporting, are they? From what I know of them, humans are simple creatures and can not. Yet this boy seems to be an exception.

However today, I was lucky enough to encounter him. He once again came into the coffee shop as I was preparing to leave. He was not alone this time. Two other humans accompanied him. One with light brown, curly hair and the other had bright red. The three of them were laughing together as they approached the counter to order. The two new humans were also quite beautiful, however they held no light to the dark haired boy.

Since he had friends with him, I decided not to approach him. Instead, I chose to observe. Human relationships are intriguing. No two ever seem to be the same. Everyone shows affection in different ways. Some people laughed and hit each other in play, while others liked to hold hands and share a kiss. I wonder if there is a difference between the two? Is one more valuable than the other?

After the three of them had ordered, I watched them take a seat at one of the tables near the window. I overheard bits of their conversation but none of it made much sense. The terms: dance, exam and competition were used often.

Deciding that it was no good to simply sit and watch them drink their coffee, I stood to leave. My movement caught the boy’s attention. He looked directly at me and to my surprise, he seemed to recognize me. He smiled sweetly and offered me a small wave. I returned the smile and politely bowed my head in greeting. Afterwhich I gathered my things and quietly left the coffee shop. My mind was still on the human with the soft eyes, my own eyes glued to my feet as I walked, until I felt a hand on my shoulder. When I looked back up, I found I was about to cross the street, cars speeding past from both directions.

With a thanks on my lips, I turned toward the one who had just saved my life. I was shocked to find it was the boy from the coffee shop. Worry clouded his eyes as he looked at me and I felt this odd sensation run through my body. A sensation that I have now identified as guilt.

He asked if I was alright and told me to be more careful. I gave him my sincerest thanks but that wasn’t enough to satisfy him. He insisted that I tell him I would be more careful in the future. I gave him my word and it’s a promise I intend to keep.

It was then that I learned his name. Park Jimin. A beautiful name to go with his beautiful features. I gave him the human name I had been assigned and his smile grew bigger, causing his eyes to nearly disappear altogether.

He handed me a small coffee with a shy smile, offering it as a thanks for the other day. I tried to refuse but he insisted. Just then his friends called him back over. I can only hope I see him again, if only to return the favor and buy him the next coffee.

Yoongi smiled fondly at the memory. Who would have known that the dark haired boy from the coffee shop, who had saved his life once, would become such an important person to him? That simple coffee that Jimin had offered, started a sort of coffee war between the two. It became a tradition after a while to have a coffee on hand whenever they saw one another.

It wasn’t long before Yoongi found out that Jimin was a student at the finest dance school in the country. Yoongi had began attending every performance since and he enjoyed every second of it. He now had a full understanding as to why humans enjoyed the art of dance so much.

Their friendship continued to grow stronger and Yoongi found it impossible to hide anything from the younger. He very clearly remembered the day in which he revealed his true identity to Jimin. Considering everything, the younger handled the news rather well.

December 13

Today I decided that I no longer wanted to keep my identity a secret from Jimin. After what he told me yesterday about trusting me with his life, I find it only fair that I do. He deserves to know, as eventually I will have to return home. I can not stay here forever.

After buying Jimin a coffee, since it was my turn to do so, I asked him to sit with me at one of the back tables. We talked about trivial things for a while: school, the upcoming dance competition, the recent drop in temperature, until I finally steered the conversation toward the topic that needed to be addressed. I wasn’t sure how to tell him, as a human mind can be quite delicate at times, so I came right out and told him. Perhaps it was not the best way, but I did not want to confuse him either.

At first he didn’t believe me, claiming that I was making it all up to tease him. Why I would do this still remains a mystery to me. Yet he was determined to believe I was. It took quite a bit of convincing and some physical proof on my end to make him believe. After that, I feared I had lost a friend. Jimin stood abruptly from his seat and without a word, he left the coffee shop.

December 14

I hadn’t seen or heard from Jimin since he left the coffee shop. I was worried I would never see him again when I ran into him on the street on my way to the university. He was holding two coffees in his hands and he silently offered me one. I took it with a small thank you and I’ll admit, it was a bit awkward at first.

I looked at him and asked, “You know I wouldn’t lie to you about this? I just wanted you to know the truth as I will have to return home someday.”

He didn’t respond right away, but when he did his voice was smaller than usual. “So I guess that means we’ll have to make every second we have together count.”

I am not entirely sure as to what he meant by those words, but I am determined to see him smile every time I am with him. This is the only way I know in which to make this all seem easier.

He walked with me the remainder of the way and I attended his dance competition later in the day. I can only hope that this means he has chosen to continue our friendship and that I have ruined it completely.

Yoongi sighed as he continued flipping through the journal. So many memories were made, most of them good. There were a few days where human emotions got in the way of a good day, but Yoongi supposed that’s what came with being friends with humans. He had also grown quite close Jimin’s two other friends over the course of his stay. Hoseok and Jungkook were both dance students as well. The three of them shared an apartment together, though Yoongi had always suspected the two were a bit closer with each other than they were with Jimin. There was something special between them. His suspicions were proven correct when on Christmas Eve, Jungkook finally worked up the courage to ask the older boy out. They’re now happily together in a way they weren’t before. Jimin had explained to Yoongi the difference between a normal friendship and the relationship they now shared. It warmed Yoongi’s heart yet he couldn’t help but feel a bit of jealousy toward them. He too wished to experience that kind of happiness and affection toward another.

Tears sprang to his eyes at the idea. Perhaps if he had just a bit longer here in the human world, he might have had just that. His fingers flipped through the pages slowly until he came across the one dated December 25. Hoseok and Jungkook had gone to spend the day with each other and their families, leaving Yoongi and Jimin to spend the day alone. As Yoongi had no family to go to and Jimin’s family lived too far to visit for the day, they spent the day together. The memory was one that was bittersweet, as it was the day Yoongi realized that the newly found emotions he was feeling were special but they would also one day cause him so much pain.

December 25

Yesterday, Jungkook asked Hoseok to go eat with him at the restaurant down the street. Apparently this has some sort of significance which I still did not understand this morning when they left together to go meet their families. It wasn’t until after they had left that I questioned Jimin about this. He explained to me that there are different kinds of relationships. The kind that Hoseok and Jungkook now had is one that is shared between two people and is considered special. According to Jimin, humans seek out these kinds of relationships with other humans all the time.

We ended up on the couch together as he explained it all to me. As he talked, I slowly began to realize that perhaps these feelings he was describing were not so far off from the ones I felt toward him. I am still not completely sure about it as I have never experienced so many emotions before, but I know that Jimin is someone special to me.

I asked him if he had ever felt these special emotions for another human before. He was hesitant but finally answered with a small shake of his head. He looked at me as he said, “I haven’t. Not with a human at least.”

I don’t know why, but my heart began racing so fast at those his words that I began to worry. Was I alright? Was my human body failing? Was I going to have to return right then and there in order to protect my life? I expressed my concerns to Jimin and he quickly explained that it was simply just another reaction humans had to feeling these emotions. His entire face grew red as he explained it and though I was a bit worried, it was also very cute.

I asked what people with these types of feelings usually did with each other and Jimin explained that there was often a lot of physical contact, such as holding hands. He attempted to explain kissing to me but I quickly let him know that I already knew what that was. He laughed when I explained that it was the act performed when sealing a deal between a human and demon. I do not see what he found to be so humorous about it. When I questioned him about it, he explained that in the human world, kissing is meant as a sweet gesture to express your love for one another. This has been recorded in my official notes. It seemed too important not to include it.

Yoongi paused in his reading. There had been many times he’d wanted to kiss Jimin. Of course he never had. There was no telling what would happen if he did. He supposed if he had enough time, he would have done it eventually. As it was, he was out of time.

Picking up his pen and flipping to the back of the book, Yoongi wrote in one last entry.

January 1

Today I discovered that I am, as the humans call it, in love. Jimin has captured my heart and made me his. If possible I would remain here and experience first hand what happens when this love progresses. As it is, my human body is slowly fading. It was not meant for an extended stay and my time is up. I have told Jimin that my time was running out. We agreed that there would be no tears, but I am worried I won’t be able to follow through with that promise.

Perhaps someday I shall return, but there is no guarantee that I will ever see him again as time travels differently in my own realm.

I have discovered and learned many things throughout my stay here, but the most important is that love is something truly special. It’s an emotion that is felt for many but only those who are truly special receive all of your love, completely unfiltered. Love is the driving force behind humans. Whether that love is platonic or romantic. It’s something not found in the demon realm. I shall miss it sorely. These feelings may disappear as soon as I cross back over and I shall forget all that I have felt here in this world. I may very well forget everything, including Park Jimin. Perhaps I am being selfish but I hope they remain. I don’t want to lose what I have gained here on Earth.

With that last bit of hope, I sign off for the last time. I will leave this journal here with you Jimin in the hopes you will read it and perhaps understand me better as I have come to understand you. I do hope we will meet again someday.

Until then,

Yoongi

Yoongi left the small apartment and shuffled across the street to the little coffee shop for the final time. He placed two orders. When the cups were handed to him, he took a careful sip of the one as he stepped back out into the cold January air. He quickly made his way through town to the campus of Jimin’s school. He knew the younger would be practicing with his group as they had a major competition coming up. He wasn’t planning on it, but his feet led him to the large room he had accompanied Jimin to many times before. His body seemed to move on its own as he quietly swung the door open enough to peer inside. There were around thirty people dancing together, but it was easy to pick out Jimin. His movements were mesmerizing and Yoongi found himself transfixed. This was the last time he would be able to watch Jimin dance. It was something he was truly going to miss, though not anymore than he would miss the boy himself.

Yoongi had to force himself away. He fought back the tears as the door swung shut, closing him off from Jimin. He would keep his promise. He wouldn’t cry. There would be no tears over his departure today. With heavy footsteps, he made his way over to the locker room where he knew Jimin would be going to change after practice. He placed the coffee and journal inside the one marked with the boy’s name.

The silence was interrupted by the subtle rush of wind he felt on his back. Yoongi didn’t need to turn to know his escort had arrived. Not a word was spoken as he quietly allowed them to take him and his weakened body back to his own world, with one last silent promise to return someday.

[modestlyabsurd]

Wallflower's Diner (Loki x Reader)

The old familiar ding-a-ling of the entrance bell. You hear it every morning when you clock in for work, and all day long during your double shifts; it sings its welcome for hungry people as they come into the diner.

Wallflower's was a little twenty-four hour hole-in-the-wall greasy spoon with a nice, artfully modern atmosphere. Regulars among newcomers come in every day, greeted by a happy person and the smell of food cooking, but what really reeled them in was the tasteful, down to earth decor and style. Natural light shines through wall to wall windows. 

Happy green succulents and wildflowers sit on tables in abstract pots and vases. Bright murals of inspiring quotes swirling above skyscrapers color the walls, inside and outside. The tables were covered in reusable cloths with uncolored pictures of birds and cityscapes, and each table gets a box of washable markers to color with while they wait for their food. Even the to-go boxes are decorated with intricate designs. 

Landing a job at this gem was something to be appreciated - and you did. 

Even though you had to work double shifts five or six days a week to support yourself - the cost of living for a young person in New York was far more than you expected - you loved working at Wallflower's. It was such a happy place. 

Some days you worked the kitchen, some days you worked the front house. Today you worked the kitchen. And since it was one of those mornings where frankly you didn't feel like waking up at five o'clock, at least you wouldn't have to deal with the public. 

The morning breezed by smoothly as you sliced bread, cut fruit and vegetables and mixed pancake batter. Breakfast tickets started piling in at six o'clock. Soon, the kitchen smelled of coffee, omelettes, sweet pastries and fruity smoothies. You and the rest of the staff were popping out orders and washing dirty dishes like clockwork. A few people even dropped coins and bills into the tip jar on the order counter. 

You recognized some of the regular orders and thought of the faces belonging to them while you cooked. One came in that made you smile upon reading it; breakfast burrito with scrambled eggs, peppers, cheese, sour cream and avocado (extra crispy, smushed down flat). 

And before your mind can put it together, here comes a flash of blue as Peter Parker runs in the kitchen, peeking into the ticket window. "Hey Y/N!" he pants, resting his chin on his propped up elbows on the window. He resembles a puppy in the most ridiculous way. 

"Hey Pete! What on earth are you doing here this early?" Peter usually came in after school hours to pick up a snack - a strawberry mango smoothie on most days - so seeing him before school even began was unusual. 

"We were outta milk, so I couldn't have any cereal." 

"Really? I'd die." 

He laughs, "I know right? And plus I haven't had a breakfast burrito in a while so it works." 

"How's Aunt May?" you ask while pouring eggs onto the griddle, thinking fondly of how much she cares about Peter and how much she really deserves a vacation. 

"She's good. She's been worried a lot, though. About the internship." 

The internship for Tony fuckin' Stark. Man, that kid got blessed. 

"I'm sure she is - I mean, she's probably not ready to let go of you yet, dude. And you have been a little more stressed out lately," you fold the pastel yellow eggs on top of each other in a roll and add a dash of seasonings - onion, cayenne, parsley - just 'cause he's special. 

"Yeah, but I'm fine. She literally has nothing to worry about, I grab coffee and sweat towels for a team of superheroes. How is that dangerous?" 

You cock your eyebrow. He thinks he's slick. He has no clue that you know he's Spiderman on the weekends, and that's what he does for Tony Stark. 

But it's fun to watch him stammer and stutter sometimes when you're onto him. 

"It depends on the superheroes, I guess. What are they like, anyway? The Avengers, that is," you ask inquisitively. 

"Oh man, Captain America is so cool. He talks about his life back in the forties all the time, about the radio stations, the sports, and sometimes he talks about his time in the war and it helps me with history tests - b-but don't tell anyone that! That's cheating!" 

"You're such a goody two-shoes." Of course, so were you. It's a part of why you and Peter became friends. "Don't worry, I won't tell. What about anyone else?" you say, generously sprinkling the cheese onto his unrolled burrito. 

"Uh, oh! I - ah," a waitress places another ticket above his head. After watching to make sure she left back into the dining area, he leans even closer into the ticket window. "I'm not supposed to tell anyone this." 

"Spill the tea, Parker." 

He stares as you carefully roll his burrito up with gloved hands, fighting with himself. He promised Happy he wouldn't tell, but he wants to tell someone so bad! And he trusts you. You've been there for him; you've talked to him for your entire hour-long break of your twelve hour shift when he failed his driving test. You've helped him study at the library before. You've even given him food on the house, which he knows is on you. You're a few years older than him, but he really considers you a friend. 

As his face becomes sweaty from steam and his stomach growls at the sight of his breakfast crisping up, he gives. 

"I met Thor the other day." 

"You what?!" 

"Shh!" he smiles hugely, "be quiet! Yes, they came from Asgard two days ago." Both yours and Peter's eyes have grown wider by at least two centimeters. 

"Thor?!" 

"Yes Thor! The real Thor! And Loki." 

Your heart sank a mile. 

That can't be right. 

"Wait, his brother? The one who tried to take over Earth? Loki? He's here too? Why is he here?!" you hiss, flipping the burrito violently, the questions tumbling out before Peter has time to answer them. 

"Hold on, hold on! Wait! He's good now! He's different! He doesn't want to kill anybody!" 

"You talked to him?!" 

"Yes! Well, I didn't really talk to him much, but he did say hi to me when Mr. Stark introduced us. Then he disappeared for the rest of the day." 

"Not suspicious at all!" 

He chuckles at the whisper-yelling you're both doing. Thankfully, he'd expected such a reaction. "C'mon, I know it sounds crazy, but Thor says he's had a change of heart. Maybe he's worth a chance, y'know? I mean, he hasn't hurt anyone yet. Well, actually he did - " 

"I don't even wanna know," you close your eyes and wave your hands, dismissing the thought of whatever it was. 

"It was just a prank! It was actually pretty funny." 

"I'll take your word for it, loser." You wrap his extra crispy, smushed down flat food in some recycled paper, then drop it into a bag with whimsical designs all over it. You write on it with a sharpie, You're really not a loser. "Actually, y'know what? I wanna know all about this later. It sounds too good to be true." 

"Believe it, babe. Keep the change!" He throws five dollars at you and it lands on the hot griddle and before you have time to berate the little rat for contaminating and for calling you babe, he's running away. The door ding-a-ling's as he bolts through it. 

You're left, picking up the bill off the stove before it catches fire. The burrito only cost a dollar and some change, so that was a fat tip; especially for a cook. 

You pocket the money, shaking your head and smiling to yourself. "Have a good day, loser." 

~

Aside from the usual lively, tiring high you get from working, talking with Peter was the highlight of your day. It left you eager to know more about the Avengers and their stories, about history, about Asgard, about space, about everything. 

You kept having to stifle a nagging emotion - anxiety? fear? maybe just nerves - when your mind pulled to the fact that Thor's brother Loki is on earth at this very moment. Only by grace were you not affected by the attack on the planet years ago, but the damage was done regardless. You were merely lucky. 

The disgust and disdain wanted to take over and sour your outlook, but pure curiosity overpowered that. Peter claims that Thor vouches for Loki now. He's biased, you think to yourself, before the angel on your shoulder pipes up, So are you. 

By the time you realize you're having a mental conversation with yourself, the countertops are wiped sparkling clean and ready for the five o'clock turn of shifts. The natural light had moved, casting longer dramatic shadows in different patterns across the checkered floor and painted walls. 

Part of you was a little bummed that Peter hadn't returned after school to pick up his usual smoothie. You'd really wanted to learn more of the Avengers and the mysterious Loki. If only you could ask May, but Peter said he wasn't supposed to tell anyone and by the sounds of it, he hadn't. You clock out at five-fifteen. Alas, you'll just have to wait.

~

Thank heavens the next day wasn't a double shift, since you were waiting tables. Although you still had to wake up at five in the morning. 

The sun shined through the diner windows in warm yellow rays, a nice contrast to the brisk morning chill. The week had ended, taking some of the initial hustle and bustle with it. Rush hour didn't start until afternoon hours on weekends which gave you and your co-workers a bit of down time to relax.

But to your surprise, a hostess flags you down in the kitchen as you're pinning an order to the ticket window. She pulls you by the arm out of earshot and says, "There's a party out there and they asked for you to be their server. By the way, it's the Avengers."

You stare at her, but you don't see her.

"Huh?"

"The Avengers are here."

Breaking yourself out of your anxious stupor, you roll your eyes incredulously. "Quit lying. It's the Delgado's, isn't it? With their prim and proper etiquette and - holy hell."

You peek over the bar.

It's the Avengers.

Habitually you begin counting heads. So, it's not all of them; there are six heroes and you only count five heads - is that Peter? - sitting along the makeshift party table toward the shadowed back of the dining area. That's definitely Peter, with Thor, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers and Jesus gremenies Loki is out there too?!

Only when a sharp pain shoots from your bottom lip do you realize you're chewing it, thinking of all the ways to curse Peter later. 

In a rush you thank the hostess and pat down your waist apron to make sure everything's there, then you're standing at the front of the table overlooking the civilian-dressed Avengers.

Your usual, partially rehearsed introduction goes exceptionally smooth. "Hey guys! Welcome to Wallflower's! My name is Y/N and I will be your server this morning. Is this your first time here?" 

Tony Stark who sits at the end like a throne speaks up, "It is, thanks to the kid, here," he mumbles, elbowing Peter in the arm. "He says he knows you." 

"Yes, unfortunately, I do know Mr. Parker - " 

"Hey!" Peter suddenly stops petting the succulent centerpiece at your fake cringing, making the whole table laugh and smile. All but one. Beside Peter. 

One of the two sitting closest to you. 

"Well, I dunno what all he briefed you on, but as you can see your table is a giant washable coloring book," they look down, suddenly noticing all the little swirls and blank spaces empty of color. You pull out small boxes of assorted washable markers from your apron and while you pass them around, realize you don't have enough for everyone. 

"That might be the niftiest thing I've ever seen," says Steve Rogers. Captain fucking America! He's already drawing on his space. 

You beam at them, "Yeah! It's one of my favorite things, getting to see the way people draw and color on their tablecloths. But it looks like I'm one box short for you guys, so I'll bring one more with your drinks. Everyone know what they're having?"

The first three, Tony, Peter and Steve, order their fountain drinks without a problem. The last two, however, haven't the first idea what a Coca-Cola or a Sprite is. Peter takes it upon himself to try and explain the concept of carbonated drinks, but fails miserably. Leaving Thor and Loki with even more confusion.

"Do you serve alcohol?" Thor asks innocently, making you nearly bubble over laughing.

"I'm afraid not. But we have coffee, sweet iced tea, orange juice or just plain water if that'd be better," you look between them, and you can't hold Loki's gaze for too long. It's intense, almost invasive; unlike the blond brother's lighthearted aura. 

Immediately Thor answers, "I'll have black coffee. Very hot, please."

You take a mental note of that request, a stupid smile covering your face. Then you look to Loki, who is now choosing to stare intently at his menu. "And for you, sir?"

He contemplates his answer as if he's being interrogated.

"Plain water will be fine."

As soon as you're out of their view, you scramble away to the kitchen with a rush of unreleased adrenaline coursing through you. Your mind's racing, your heart's beating and you're pouring the heros' drinks like a mad person. Hell, you almost spilled hot coffee on your hands from shaking so much. 

The worst part was it came from you fanning over the Avengers.

You reminded yourself to focus. It was a rather slow afternoon - especially considering the circumstance that would presumably bring people to see - but there were still three other tables you had to tend to.

On your way back to the dining room you almost forget to grab another box of markers before your hands are full with the drink tray. Weaving through a couple customers and other waitresses you make it to the long table.

You circle the table to sit everyone's drinks in front of them. Everyone's locked in a childlike trance as they color and doodle on the tablecloth; you glance around and notice the one who isn't. No one gave Loki any of the markers.

"Here's your markers as well," you lean over and extend your hand with the box to Loki. He averts momentarily from staring at your face to the markers. His mouth opened and closed, not sure of what to say. So he extends a frighteningly pale hand and takes them. 

He accidentally brushes his fingertips to yours.

You both jerk away.

Damn, his hand is freezing, you thought, hiding your hand behind your back and flexing a fist; it lingered like a static shock.

He's gotten wide-eyed now, nearly apologizing. You can't help but feel bad for snatching your hand away like that.

"Cold hands means a warm heart. A-at least, that's what they say," you stutter. Loki retorts, looking down at his markers.

"You must be quite cold-hearted then."

"Loki!" Thor scolds. Although the others were now giving him dirty looks, you sensed not a bit of malice in his comment. In fact, your cheeks were heating up a great deal. 

"Please, Y/N, don't mind the asshole," Tony says waving his hand in Loki's direction.

"Oh believe me, I've dealt with far worse just this week. Being called cold-hearted is a nothing," you assure them. The genuine grin on your face is helping a lot. "Are we ready to order?"

With that, you scribble each of their orders down onto your notepad before gathering the menus and making way back to the kitchen. The steamy heat hits your face like a splash of cold water. Exactly what you need.

You almost want to giggle out loud at the fact that you're semi-nailing being the Avengers' waitress. They're happy, they're comfortable, they're talking with each other. Coloring the table, still. You glance their way as you cover your other tables' refills and cheques and notice that every time you do, Loki looks up at you. Piercing enough to make you quickly avert.

The clock ticked away, closer to your thirty minute break. As much fun as you were having, the anxiety level was up there. Your mind went back to how you'd seek revenge at Peter. Maybe you'll add a big splash of lemon juice to his smoothie on Monday. Or cayenne pepper. That would be entertaining.

Once you get out of the groove, the nerves crawl up. So you occupy yourself by clearing off a couple of finished tables, balancing them on your arms to the kitchen to be washed. When you get there, the cook is placing the last plate of the team's order on the counter. Perfect timing, you think to yourself.

Defying all odds that have previously proven you a clumsy mess, you singlehandedly bring out all five plates into the dining room and make it to their table. Instantly, the markers are forgotten and the smell of toasted bread, sweet tomatoes and fresh herbs arouse the guys from their drawing. Tony, Steve and Thor are practically drooling from hunger, Peter makes grabby hands for his food.

Loki's food is served last, following the order in which it was taken. You set his plate in front of him, covering whatever he'd been diligently drawing.

He looks up at you again, meeting your eyes, and holds them there for a second longer. 

"Thank you."

That feeling in your hand earlier? It's back, but now it's spreading through your sternum.

"You're welcome."

You find yourself still staring even after he's dropped his grateful gaze to his plate. 

Air shoves its way into your chest.

"Alright! Please enjoy, and you guys just let me know if you need anything." A round of muffled appreciation sounds come from the team as they've already began shoveling.

What am I feeling? Pre-heart attack symptoms?

People are clearing out, leaving only the team and two others dining. This gives you a chance to do some cleaning up before you take your break. And a chance to sort your thoughts.

Is he mind-controlling you? No way, that couldn't be. There's no way he'd be going places like normal people with them if that were the case. But that sure is how it feels. Like you can't get rid of the thought. The coldness. The way he holds your gaze.

Who knew that simple eye contact could arouse so many feelings?

It also feels completely and morally wrong. Love at first sight is a farce, let alone with someone of Loki's caliber. He likely looks at everyone like that. A manipulation tactic. It's not even the first time a customer has tried sweet-talking a waitress. Of course, calling someone cold hearted is certainly a unique way of sweet-talking.

But it was the way he said it!

You're no fool. You know when you're being flirted with. Or are you? Who said that one innocent comment is flirting? You very well might be a fool at this rate.

Beads of sweat have bubbled on your forehead. You wipe them on your forearm. 

Before you know it, your section of the dining area is clean. Spotless, even. You take the rag to the back to be washed with the dishes. Glancing at the clock, a sigh falls from your lips; you let another waitress know you'll be taking your break.

Being on your feet for four hours straight left them aching. Sitting on the curb was a great opportunity to stretch your legs out and pop the muscles in your back as well. You revelled in the breeze fanning your flushed face, watching the city bustle by. People on their phones, texting or talking, bums smoking cigarettes.

You stared at the scuff marks and worn spots on your boots. Distracting. From the fluttering in your chest. What an strange feeling. Warm, exciting. Queasy. Longing. All somehow from a single touch - a mere meeting of the eyes. I must be insane.

The shrill ding-a-ling of the door brings you back to reality.

Thumps hit the door behind you. Footfalls rumble the concrete and before you process it, men come barreling out and run down the sidewalk. One takes off in flight in a wisp of blond hair. It's then you realize that was Thor, and the rest of them following in their inferiority.

Tony Stark then leisurely exits Wallflower's, hands in his pockets. As if none of that happened.

Dumbfounded. That's the word.

You raise your head to look up, since he's blocking the sun from your back. "Uh, shouldn't you be with them?" you ask with a nervous chuckle.

"Probably. But I had to make sure you got this." He hands you a small white envelope with the Stark Industries logo on it. Without another word he begins strolling away toward the others, now a few blocks down.

Huh. You already miss them. Him especially. Dammit.

You open the envelope and inside is a flat stack of green. Twenties? You count them, trembling.

A three hundred dollar tip?!

~

Upon further investigation, you found their plates cleaned and strewn about the table from the dramatic exit. As you took them, you looked at everyone's drawings and colorings. Peter had nearly colored a paisley print in reds and purples, Steve had began a detailed doodle of Wallflower's Diner from the outside (he never finished the sign), Thor and Tony had the absolute messiest pictures ever, and Loki.

Goodness gracious, Loki.

He'd written admiring adjectives beginning in letters that spelled your name in loopy, beautiful handwriting. He'd began drawing intricate filigree around it, but didn't get a chance to finish. You traced the designs, engulfed by the artistic quality. Overwhelmed with sudden emotion. Breathless. No one's ever done anything like that for you...

So you're not insane!

Maybe you'll reconsider taking revenge on Peter...