#I know it’s dumb spy is NOT that nice in canon

[quotidianish]

“Scout is everyone’s son” ok I raise you this, spy is everyone’s father

[luffington]

hiii im the anon from way back when now that ur at whole cake i wanted to spin the block on my sabo request from earlier (of course only if you want to no pressure!)

✧.* art credit!

➤ prompt: can i request a sabo x f!reader who’s a strawhat who joins the revolutionary army alongside robin during the timeskip and immediately hits it off and becomes close friends with him while on baltigo and then reunites with him in dressrosa [fwb trope perhaps?? 👀👀]

➤ pairing: sabo x afab!reader

➤ word count: 2.5k

➤ warnings: dom!sabo, semi-public sex, praise kink, thigh riding, facial, friends with benefits, fluff, fem reader

in episode of sabo he officially entered the colosseum competition but it’s never explained in canon so let’s pretend he somehow snuck in before the final battle hehe

i really hope you like this after waiting for so long!! :') i've only seen him in dressrosa so i'm sorry if this isn't accurate to his character in future arcs! (also if you can't tell i Love koala <3)

NSFW under the break! minors dni thank uuu

Soldiers with guns ready to fire surrounded you the moment you landed on Baltigo. In a panic, you insisted that you weren’t an intruder. You didn’t even know where you were intruding. One moment you were on Sabaody Archipelago and then Bartholomew Kuma touched you and suddenly you were soaring through the air in a giant bubble — and that made them pause. Kuma would never send an enemy to their headquarters. The paw-shaped crater left behind was undeniable proof of your story, and your bounty poster confirmed that you were a Straw Hat Pirate instead of a spy. With no plausible way to get back to your crew, you decided to temporarily join the Revolutionary Army. 

About a week later, Sabo returned from a successful assignment and was enthusiastically welcomed back by everyone at the base. He seemed nice enough, but as the chief of staff, he obviously had more pressing issues to attend to than getting to know a new recruit. He would give you a friendly wave whenever he saw you, but nothing more.

Then the news of Ace’s death came and all of his memories flooded back. He was absolutely heartbroken, but you didn’t want to intrude on such a personal moment for a man you hardly knew, so you decided to leave him alone. Instead, you begged to borrow a ship to find your captain, who must’ve also been suffering terribly. 

As soon as Sabo heard you mention Luffy, he remembered that you were a Straw Hat – and you’d been with them long enough to have met Ace in Alabasta. He quickly latched onto you and you were more than happy to tell him stories about his brothers, as well as your brief encounter with Garp. Robin arrived at Baltigo a few days after Luffy’s appearance in the newspaper and gladly joined your conversations, but slyly gave the two of you lots of alone time.

You liked Sabo more and more each time you talked to him. It didn’t take long to notice his similarities to his family – they all had the same reckless confidence, happy-go-lucky attitudes, and admirable dedication to whatever cause they put their mind to. Even Dragon shared these qualities under his stony exterior (and you realized in horror that you now knew that entire insane family). 

But the blonde was flirty. And touchy. The friendly hugs he gave you grew longer and more intimate; his hands lingered on your shoulders and brushed against your thighs. You were delighted to reciprocate – though you had no romantic feelings for him, he was undeniably gorgeous. Sexual tension between you grew until it exploded with the help of several bottles of cheap sake and a shared hotel room. He pinned you down and fucked you dumb until you were covered in cum and screaming his name. Poor Koala in the neighboring room was traumatized, especially by the sound of your bedframe collapsing.

Sabo became your best friend and your best stress reliever, effortlessly transitioning from casual conversations to shoving his dick down your throat. Being in the Revolutionary Army was incredibly dangerous, of course, but Sabo always made sure you were well-protected and cared for. However, you still had no doubts about returning to the Straw Hats after two years had passed. You were sad to leave your friend, but he promised you’d see each other again. 

You didn’t realize it would be so soon.

Only two weeks after you departed for Sabaody, you found yourself wandering the colorful cobblestone streets of Dressrosa in an admittedly terrible disguise. Separated from your crew and searching for the SMILE Factory despite having no leads. Everything about the country, its citizens, and Law’s supposedly flawless plan felt strange. 

But what caught you off-guard the most was a hooded figure passing by and grabbing your arm, leaning close to your ear, and using a very familiar voice to whisper, “Hey.”

A hint of soft blonde hair peeking out from under the fabric nearly gave you a heart attack. “Sabo?!”

He quickly clamped a gloved hand over your mouth, shutting you up immediately. He brought his face close to yours, whispering in a teasing tone, “Are you trying to blow my cover? Naughty girl.” Your cheeks burned bright red.

Sabo glanced around cautiously, but no one in the streets spared a fleeting glance at the two of you. The majority of Dressrosans were further down the block in a large open plaza, watching the Colosseum match broadcast in real time. The opening ceremony had just finished and the first round was beginning. He didn’t give a shit – he only needed to pay attention to Hack in round two. 

“C’mon, let’s talk somewhere else.” The blonde grabbed your hand and led you down a back alley hidden behind a row of shops. Once you were sufficiently shielded by a stack of wooden storage crates, he pulled down the hood of his brown cloak.

“What the hell are y–” Soft lips slammed against your own as he caged you against the wall, pulling you into a heated kiss and biting your bottom lip. Sabo was as unpretentious as ever, not wasting any time to take what he wanted. Fingers trailing up your thigh in a very obvious way before he grabbed the meat of your ass. 

“Figured it was better than a hug,” he laughed. A beautiful sound that you missed hearing every day. He kissed along your cheek then nipped at your earlobe, causing you to flinch. “You know I’m here to stop Doflamingo’s weapons trade. I don’t have a lot of time, but I needed to see you and make sure you’re doing okay.” 

Sabo paused to run his hand down your chest until it reached your clothed core, palming you through your pants. You whimpered and instinctively bucked into his touch.

“And have a quickie. It’s been too long since I felt this pretty cunt. Don’t know when I’ll get a chance again,” he growled against your neck, using two fingers to stroke the outline of your pussy lips and push the rough fabric tighter against you.

“B-but we’re in the middle of the street…” You glanced at the sunny entrance to the alleyway, heart racing at the thought of someone seeing you. 

“I wouldn’t say the middle,” the blonde chuckled, gesturing to the desolate space around you. “Besides, with everything happening today, I don’t think public indecency is anyone’s biggest concern.”

You bit your lip anxiously, but the feeling of his warm body pressed against yours and his lips moving down your neck overrode all rational thoughts. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t fantasize about him pounding into your cunt every night since you left the Army. Plus, his cloak was large enough to completely shield your bodies from any prying eyes. To any passerby, you would look like a couple engaging in a little too much PDA – not a rare sight in the kingdom of love.

“W-why–” Your breath hitched as he shoved his hands under your top to roughly squeeze your breasts. “Why did Dragon decide to do this operation now? The meeting we had was–” You tried your best to stifle a lewd moan, the soft leather of his gloves not hiding the roughness of his fingers tugging at your nipples. “W-was weeks ago…”

“Can we please not talk about Dragon while I’m trying to fuck you?” Sabo pouted cutely, making you giggle. “We’ll have a real conversation later, I promise. I need my little stress relief toy right now.” He shoved one of his knees between yours, tensed thigh pressing insistently on your cunt. “Grind that cute pussy on my leg. Show me how much she missed me.” His eyes darkened when you immediately complied, letting out cute whimpers at the delicious friction. “Fuck, that’s so hot.”

Loud cheering echoed down the street, likely related to the tournament, and you instinctively turned towards the sound. Sabo gripped your chin and forced you to face him again. 

“Hey. Eyes on me.” You nodded obediently, and he whispered “good girl” before shoving his tongue down your throat. You tangled your fingers in his soft blonde locks, running your thumb over his scarred cheek affectionately. He truly was so handsome.

Deciding your pace was too slow, the blonde grabbed your hip and roughly guided your core back and forth on his thigh. His noticeable bulge strained against the fabric of his elegant cadet gray pants – even undercover, he was as well-dressed as always. “Sabo, please…”

“Don’t worry, I’ll give you exactly what you want.” He unbuckled his belt and let his cock spring free, bouncing against his stomach and standing proudly at full hardness. Your pants were abruptly yanked down to your knees next. Sabo didn’t miss the chance to take off his glove and swipe a finger through your wet folds, making you shiver. “You’re already dripping.”

“You’re one to talk,” you smirked, playfully running your palm up his length and wiping away the precum beading at the top.  

“Such a fucking tease.” He groaned, pretty eyes darkening. “Lift your leg for me.” 

You kicked your pants off completely and did as you were told. Sabo hooked his hand under your knee, tilting your pelvis towards him for the best angle to fuck into you. Paused to adjust his cloak, making sure you were completely concealed, and looked around for any prying eyes. Once he was satisfied with your relative privacy, he lined up his cock with your entrance, tauntingly tapping the head against your puffy clit.

“Wait, Sabo. Condom.”

“Don’t have any.” He shrugged and your eyes widened. “What? They’re not exactly essential on an espionage mission.”

You frowned, but it was too late to find one now. “Just don’t cum inside, okay?”

“‘Course not.” He chuckled lightheartedly, contrasting with the rough way he thrust his dick inside your cunt, fully sheathing it inside in one go. It stretched out your pussy perfectly, hitting every sensitive spot inside you.

“Oh, fuck,” you whined, throwing your head back, realizing too late how loud you were and quickly covering your own mouth. Sabo’s gaze darkened with lust and a smug sense of pride that he made you cry out like a whore. 

“Weren’t you concerned about being caught?” The blonde snickered, grinding his hips against yours in slow circles. He yanked your hand away, pressed a chaste kiss against your lips, then thrust his removed glove in your mouth. Not caring that it would definitely be soaked in spit by the end. 

Sabo braced one hand on the wall next to your head and fucked you hard and fast, bullying your cunt and smacking his balls against your skin with every thrust. Even without any time pressure, this was how you normally had sex – he was always impatient and greedy to take whatever he wanted, and you were more than willing to give him everything. 

The filthy sound of your wet walls squelching around his cock and his debauched groans filled your ears. You clenched onto his overcoat for stability and buried your face in the crook of his neck, but he tangled his fingers in your hair and yanked your head back. “Eyes on me, remember?”

You nodded, unable to do anything but let out muffled moans around his glove. Eyes glazed over and drool dripped down your chin. Your fucked-out expression went straight to his cock and made him rut into you even faster, the tip of his dick kissing your cervix. Feeling himself getting close, he flicked your clit and rubbed tight circles on the bundle of nerves. He leaned forward to kiss a sensitive spot right under your jaw – you never told him that he couldn’t give you hickies.

“You gonna cum?” A rhetorical question. He could definitely feel how soaked you were around him, how you desperately met his thrusts and sucked his dick in even deeper. Your body would’ve collapsed long ago if he wasn’t there to pin you in place and use you like a fuckdoll. The blonde whispered absolute filth with interludes of praise into your ear to help you to the edge even faster. 

Divine pleasure consumed your body as you hit your peak, cunt tightening around Sabo’s cock and nearly causing him to empty his balls inside of you. He carefully restrained himself to honor your request – and he had a better idea, anyways.

Once the aftershocks of your orgasm had subsided and you descended back to reality, Sabo pulled out of you. His dick was angry red and painfully hard. After removing the sticky glove from your mouth, he commanded, “On your knees.”

Your shaky legs gave out and you sank to the ground, knees hitting the solid stone street hard enough to bruise, but you barely noticed. The blonde positioned his cock in front of your face and rapidly jerked off inches away from you. You opened your mouth obediently and he murmured “fuck” underneath his breath. 

He bit his lip hard enough to bleed when he came seconds later. Thick strings of white painted your face and barely landed in your mouth. You looked up at him with cum on your eyelashes, slightly annoyed but incredibly aroused. “Sorry,” he panted with a grin, and clearly not apologetic at all. “You’re just so goddamn sexy like this.”

You swallowed the drops of cum lucky enough to land in your mouth. Sabo wiped the rest off with his cloak — it was his mess to clean, after all – then pinched your cheek lovingly. He helped you fix your clothes and hair to make sure it didn’t look like you just had rough sex in a random alleyway. 

A muffled Transponder Snail rang in his coat pocket. He looked at you for permission, and you grinned and told him he could answer it. 

“I’ve been trying to reach you!” Koala’s annoyed voice shouted through the Snail. You were obviously too preoccupied to hear any of her previous attempts to call him. “Hack lost to some green-haired weirdo. Can you figure out a way to get inside the Colosseum? We need to find that underground port.”

Sabo quickly handed you the Snail. “Hi, Koala,” you giggled.

“Oh, hey! What are you doing here?” She brightened up immediately at the sound of your voice. There was a small pause as she took a moment to process, then the Snail mimicked her furious expression. “Sabo, what the hell? Really?!”

He laughed loudly. “I couldn’t help myself. But I’ll go now.”

“You better.” Koala grumbled, then said goodbye to you in a much nicer tone. 

The blonde turned to you apologetically, but you just smiled and said, “Go win the Flare-Flare Fruit. You deserve it.” Then gave him a good-luck peck on the cheek, which made his face light up into a giant grin. “And find Luffy while you’re at it!”

After the chaos of the day was over, Sabo met you and the Straw Hats at Kyros’s house, where you were finally able to sit down and chat for a while. Before he left, he repeated his promise that he’d see you again no matter what. 

[fishbaitslime]

Leafpool/Hawkfrost hypokits? Pls and thank you

hawkfrost and leafpool i think met at a gathering and leaf was immediately charmed by him. In my heart she has a thing for bad boys lol so she fell for him hard. hawk thought she was pretty and nice but defo was encouraged by tigerstar to get with her- but he did actually have genuine love feelings for her.

in this au, i think hawkfrost’s plans succeed in killing firestar, also killing brambleclaw. with no witnesses, he spins the story as him stumbling upon brambleclaw having trapped firestar, already taken the leaders lives- and hawkfrost in-turn fought brambleclaw to stop him before he moved onto the rest of thunderclan.

this kinda turned squirrelflight and leafpools relationship a bit sour, squirrel blaming hawk (rightfully) and leaf being like “you can’t see past your own nose and accept that bramble was just bad.” which thennn escalates to leafpool deciding to join riverclan as a medicine cat, the two becoming a leader medicine cat iconic duo power couple.

id like to think eventually hawkstars treachery is revealed which results in a lot of angst… perhaps ill make this an actual au lol

EAGLEFROST is our jay stand in. He’s still blind but becomes a warrior bc idk fuck the erins he can do what he wants. He’s revered throughout riverclan for his battle prowess and cunning, making for a skilled fighter even as an apprentice. This is partly due to having been trained in the dark forest all his life alongside his siblings. Eaglefrost isn’t dumb, he knows his family history.. he just is torn between honoring his legacy and doing what’s right. Renamed Eagle- because i think Hawk would talk Leafpool into a little more of a Cooler Bird Name. Then -frost as a kind’ve reference to his canon name being from his canon father, but also bc of his cold and calculated battle shit <3

TIGERLEAF is our lion, and our replacement medicine cat! I think Tigerstar would want a spy on the inside to starclan, so Hawk would probably fake a sign that would make he’s sons destiny within the medicine den. Tigerleaf is actually a very sweet soul, taking after Leafpool a lot and not at all his father or siblings. He is the voice of reason of the group, and he is usually the one to tell right from wrong. This leaves him within a lot of turmoil. His family is everything and that means their safety and success should be valued above all… right? Tiger- is because, again, I think Hawk/Tiger would disapprove of the Lion- prefix so yeagh. Leaf bc he plant doctor forever<3 but also his mom

TADPOLESTORM is our holly, and she is my favoriteee. Raised within the dark forest along her siblings, Tadpolestorm has been trained to be vicious but more importantly- fiercely loyal and obedient. Instead of the warrior code, Tadpolestorm is absolutely obsessed with helping her family. She know’s of (almost) all of Hawkstar’s deeds, and holds those secrets close to her chest. She would do anything to insure her father, mother, and brothers are safe- anything. Hawkstar has chosen her as elected deputy, and one day, leader. Tadpole- is from hawk’s brotherr and -storm is bc sheee a bit crazayyy (/affectionate)

despite all of this stuff, i do think Hawkstar does genuinely love Leafpool and his kids..he’s just got a lot going on.

warrior cat hypokit requests are open!

[coffee-writesthings]

Merc Headcanons: Escape room edition

I've had these hc's in my head for a hot minute and thought I would share since I finally got around to transcribing them

Offense

Soldier - would not be all that good. Would try to brute force locks and can understand a lot of basic hints but struggles with the more elaborate stuff.

Pyro would be great at anything that requires seeing through something or other visual distortions (i know they canonically can't read but I'm ignoring that)

Scout - If it were just offense doing a room together he'd be pulling the major weight. If not and it's just the whole of red or blu, he's chill, making jokes and pointing out the things that should be obvious

Defense

Demo - He's more sober than usual for this, since escape rooms generally aren't his strong suit. He probably would help Soldier with what he struggles with and is a generalized support for the rest of the team (emotionally speaking at least)

Heavy - Logic puzzles are his jam aside from struggles with language barriers. Keeps others focused on the actual objectives though

Engineer - Frankly i think he'd be kinda useless. Those 11 PHD's are good for a lot, sure, but a lot of escape rooms work on the assumption that you haven't got that high of a knowledge base. He'd try his best to keep track of the clues (maybe writing them down). Though he would also be the most likely to get sucked into a red herring imo (because i think he would think too much about it, yknow?)

Support

Sniper - Being taller than most of the team means he can reach clues put high up, as well as other hidden items. He can also read which helps a lot considering half of them can't read canonically

Medic - Fucking fascinated with the clues. He comes to a lot of conclusions which are largely wrong. maybe he also gets a bit too engrossed in the red herrings. Like I think if he and engineer are in a room together their intelligence levels cancel out entirely and they become functionally dumb as fuck.

Spy - wasn't sure he even wanted to go but his team had to drag him out of the base. Eventually he'd find himself more into the experience. He finds the most fun in it, arguably. It also fits as a nice bit of bonding time with Scout

[transingthoseformers]

I love the idea of Optimus becoming Optrinix, and then to have Bumblebee become Gold Bug is perfect and adds more angst because Bumblebee wasn't a traitor or spy, Bulkhead was right and Wasp realizes that it was his actions that led to Bulkheads friend becoming a monster

Wasp is definitely more well behaved especially being around Bulkhead he knows better than to try to piss off Bulkhead especially with him being responsible for Bumblebee going to the stockades. Also Elita appreciates this sassy yet respectful small bot. It's nice for her especially after her dear friend Optimus died and Sentinel all but abandoned her and blamed her with the failed mission

I realized something Optimus doesn’t originally want to go to Arachna or whatever the planet is called so Sentinel forced him to go there and then left him for dead there. Optrinix is out for Sentinels blood

Bulkhead entirely believes that Bumblebee was framed and innocent and he's definitely even more pissed off when he proven right and that his former best friend has been turned into a massive technorganic bee.

Exactly exactly

Wasp is going to feel so much guilt

So much guilt

And yeah! Out of Elita, Optimus, and Sentinel, Optimus was the one who didn't want to go. Here, the fact of him being the "innocent" one and "dying" has GOTTA effect them somehow along with the rest of it. Since Elita is on the spacebridge team, it means she was either kicked out if the academy or left willingly (I've seen the latter happen in a fic). I get the vibe that the fallout between Sentinel and Elita was INSANE, because I can mostly see her blaming him first. In hindsight, they were just three dumb kids looking for an adventure, they couldn't have predicted the massive spiders and for one of them to "die".

Optronix is 100% out for Sentinel's energon yes yes, he too blames Sentinel so much for all of it, I honestly feel like while BA was mostly motivated by her trying to cure away her organic half, Optronix is moreso motivated by vengeance. Just like how Goldbug is in this situation.

How evil would I be if I suggested Optronix still has that seduction ability that BA has in canon TFA, because it's a skill?

I'm imagining there's several cool interactions between Optronix and Elita Prime, because she's sympathetic to his plight but also he has decided to become evil. So it's a whole thing.

Bulkhead's having Emotions about this, and I can see this hitting him very hard

[popatochisssp]

So I had this question about reader/yn fics for a while now how come you don’t use ocs in your fics instead? reader mcs are technically ocs but still im really curious

I haven't thought about the 'why' too much, to be honest.

I guess I started reading some /reader fics when I was younger, and then wrote a few, and then later felt like it was cringey and dumb and moved away from it for awhile and only read and wrote fics that shipped canon characters.

And then when Undertale came out, I thought it was awesome but I didn't really hardcore ship anybody in the canon, so I took a look at what was on AO3 to see what the popular ships were and a ton of it was Sans/Reader.

At first I avoided it because of those 'cringe' feelings, but you know how it goes, you see some cool fanart or hear people talking something up and decide to give it a shot, and I did and it kind of reignited the passion for /reader stuff, I guess.

Personally, I've always had a hard time coming up with OCs, especially ones I feel connected to, but /reader fics sidestep that part and just put you in the situation you want to read about, and I think that's pretty cool. It's a nice way to explore stuff that's probably never going to happen to you in real life--like an epic fantasy romance, or some kind of spy adventure, or in this case, dating a skeleton monster--and writing it, I kind of get to both think about the experience and share it with other people who can also dive right into it.

I generally try to leave the reader-insert as vague as possible when I write so that more people can have that experience of being able to insert themselves into the story without being taken out by specific details, like hair type, body features, even just using they/them pronouns instead of she/her opens things up a lot and more people can have the same kind of fun I do thinking about smooching a skeleton.

And that makes me happy, so I guess that's why I do it!

[moonlight-tmd]

regarding your recent post:

I'll be honest, I'm either rooting for blitz or prowl lmao X3

blitz cause he's gone out of his way to do these things for bee that you listed in the other and his pure admiration and love for the lil' bug. blitz has nerve and gut to do those things, especially for an autobot ; who are the enemy since he's a decepticon, blitz's own fraction and leader are an after thought, and I respect that to an extent lol

can't really say the same for shockwave/longarm tbh but he's trying lol

and prowl because of the chemistry he and bee shared in the canon of the actual show. I'm pretty sure there are two episodes dedicated to just the duo working together or bonding cause they're the embodiment of technology and nature. I like this one because it fits more into the canon and they just give me brain rot >v<

and bee just seeking protection from bulk from all three is funny and cute to me! like, bulk and bee are long term besties of course they'd protect each other. bee just running to bulk, asking for a place to hide (from longarm and prowl lmao) and bulk agreeing. so, bee just naps in bulk's subspace while he's doing something as prowl and longarm wander around the factory

yeh me too X3

Blitz is literally attached to the Decepticons by nothing other than the fact he's scared of Megatron, it says so on the wiki even. And now Megatron is gone so technically there's nothing holding him back from doing what he wants and ditching everything to pursue the yellow scout that stole his Spark.

Prowl knew Bee for a while and had grown to admire him in secret. He never thought about asking him out cuz there was never an occasion- plus he thinks that Bee will turn him down cuz he's so different from him. (even if they get along great as they are)

Longarm/Shockwave is just stuck in a perpetual loop of "What's more important: Job or Love?" So he's just trying to cope with everything at once- seeing how every choice will impact his and Bee's life and all. It's a lot even for his processor. Although, similar to Blitz, Megs is gone atm so there's nothing holding him back from casually switching sides once and for all and devoting his life to Bee.

Bee is just there very confused and worried to why everyone wants to date him all of a sudden. I mean, he likes the attention but he doesn't like how possesive each of them get. He doesn't wanna be treated like a prize, but like a loved one. Bulkhead is just trying to help him out and so is the rest of the team- when Bee suddenly disappears they don't tell Prowl or Longarm where he went on purpose. Prowl is smart enough to understand Bee avoids him which saddens him. He wants to apologize but he never gets an opportunity.

Tbh after Blitz reveals Longarm is a spy there are 2 routes it can go; Longarm gets arrested and Bee is hurting cuz he did like him and Shockwave is just being depressed in his prison cell. Or Longarm pulls an uno reverse and says he's been an Autobot spy in disguise and been doing infiltration missions in secret to get Decepticon files, effectively earning him a good favor with Bee. (he's not really registered in the criminal records, he has access to that if he needed to delete it and all his actions have been anonymous from the start, few know of Shockwave's existance.)(Blitz knew Shockwave for a bit but he is too dumb to see thru Long's lie.)

Either way it's most likely that both Blitzwing and Prowl get to date Bumblebee. If Shockwave does decide to pull the uno reverse then he tags along too. Don't worry they learn to share nicely and that there is enough love for everyone.

though BlitzBee is my favorite but don't tell them

[tricornonthecob]

I should just do ten ahead of time

LK 108: Continental Congress 2, Legislative Boogaloo

(pt1)(pt2)(pt3)(pt4)

dude came all the way down from the mountains to watch Philadelphians argue.

NGL I would get into a street argument if there was an opportunity to see what sort of wild aphorisms Benji Franx could whip up in an attempt to settle differences. Then again I've got a really nice pair of tits so he'd probably try to hit on me.

Whatever he said confused the hell outta these two.

The flourish of this old man.

I wonder where the budget went for this episode.

Chore jumpscare.

hot chore potato.

Your dad fought in the North American theater of the Seven Years War how do you not know Washington?? He must've never talked about the war. Oh God he never talks about the war headcanons activated.

We've seen her run without doing the skirts grab before, she's doing it for extra sass.

more hot chore potato

Well, he is one of the resident horsegirls.

I know he sounded upset at having to care for the horses but I still maintain he's a horsegirl.

Everyone point and laugh at the shit-scooper

How dare you defy me, canon.

Henri don't play dumb you were fucking present the last time they were both at the shop together.

...regrettably.

James your plans are terrible, you are not the best field agent in this outfit. Go brush the ponies we know you're a horsegirl.

And he is incredibly excited to have SOME job after not having a spy assignment in months.

oooh is the weaselly man hiding about in trees going to manipulate a teenager?

Oh man he totally is and its totally gonna work on that beagle/great dane puppy of a boy.

How is this not immediately throwing up red flags, man even Henri's brain cell isn't on top of it.

Dang does Weaselly Paul have James' number or what.

[ess-presso]

your fic recs have been absolutely superior so ty. my turn! engraved upon my heart (in letters deeply worn) by inkpot_winters - jegulus little women au. need i say more. (also bc little women was in your top books)

taylor time! sad beautiful tragic, the moment i knew, and the way i loved you! ( i keep thinking im repeating ones ive already said so if i give u one i already said just ignore it LOL)

chat time!

drarry being a guilty pleasure is so real. like drarry and jegulus is same ship different font so u cant go wrong.

and being used as a personal grammarly by friends? SO real. my best friend cant spell for shit and ive been her dictionary and autocorrect since we kids.

okay but red converse is so james of you. i have red converse as well (i think i wore nothing but my red converse for an entire year when i was 16) but i like to change it up with my green or black converse too (i drew stars and moons all over the rubber part on my black ones because. i have to make everything in my life about wolfstar obviously)

GREEK MYTHOLOGY KIDS UNITE! this makes me so happy. truly a superior breed. i guess my obsession just bled into my academic career and here i am LOL. and dont worry, caecilius est in horto is a joke here too (at least it was in my intro to latin class, i feel like the average canadian would be lost)

love that u want to save lives. thats so cool of u. my best friend is a nursing student and shes the most badass person ive ever met so maybe its a prerequisite to be cool if u save lives.

(also wanting to be an agent after watching a spy movie is SO REAL like i swear my divine purpose becomes being a cool ass kicking agent, until reality dawns on me and i remember im just. a random person)

your top books list is so good. i love little women SM & ive heard so many good things about if we were villains (i really need to get on reading that)

also JUMANJI i love that movie. so good. and the hunger games movies ofc just classics at this point. and help the woman calling herself the kim k of businesswomen in the apprentice is so funny some people say the funniest things.

id love to visit new york too. concrete jungle where dreams are made of, obviously. the big gulp cup. god i want one too. (we have them in canada but i think ours are way smaller?)

your jewelry sounds so cool. i love the hp pandora bracelet thats so cool & rings! i love rings sm i cannot leave the house without them.

pop tarts & chinese takeout is such a good combination. perfect comfort food fr.

and a fellow cat person! i like dogs but i love cats sm. i have 3 and theyre my most favourite little creatures on the planet.

an INFJ! very remus of u. (at least i think hes an INFJ? idk i saw a tiktok about it lol) im an INTJ so im living up to my reg kinnie status.

stars is such a good choice. i will always be a star person too (and hello? im an ex-astronomy student too thats so funny). theyre just so pretty and i swear i could stare at them for hours.

christmas is my fav holiday too!! ive actually always wanted to visit london at christmas time it sounds so nice. do you get much snow during the winter? we dont get much snow here so honestly anywhere that gets snow at christmas sounds great to me.

I ACTUALLY DONT KNOW WHY I THOUGHT JAMES OPENED THE DOOR??? i think i read some dumb thing somewhere where he opened the door wearing a lightning mcqueen costume and it really stuck with me😭 i guess i decided that was canon to me LOL

question answer time!

fav rarepair - oh god i dont even know. i tend to always enjoy the more popular ships. although i did read a fake dating fic where james and evan fake dated to make barty and reg jealous, and ofc barty and reg fake dated to make james and evan jealous. (a star for a summer's day by moony_reggie if u wanna check it out!) so ill say james x evan. they had more chemistry together than i would've expected.

fuck marry kill james sirius remus - GOd. i cant even answer that question thats like the hardest thing anyone has ever asked me. uhmmm ill fuck them all, and then marry them all. if i had to kill someone itd be myself because i cannot be responsible for any of their deaths THEYVE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH!!

place i wanna visit - id love to visit new zealand. im a HUGE lord of the rings fan and they filmed the movies there so id die if i ever got the chance to visit. ive actually always wanted to visit london too (and a lot of the UK in general, especially wales and scotland) as well as italy & greece! i visited both on a school trip a few years ago and it was a dream come true but id love to go back.

fav book/book series - another brutal question but ill try:

picture of dorian gray

song of achilles

percy jackson series

shadowhunter chronicles (yes its the incest series NO THEYRE NOT ACTUALLY SIBLINGS I SWEAR! we dont talk about it.)

mara dyer series by michelle hodkin (underrated and so good)

hp series ofc

hunger games ALWAYS.

six of crows duology my beloved <3

most embarrassing thing ive ever done - oh man. okay lets see. when i was in 10th grade i had to take a spanish oral final at the end of the school year but i am an ANXIOUS woman and did not wanna do that so i skipped my spanish class until the end of the year. my best friend was in my class and my teacher kept asking her where i was until one day she told my teacher i had CHLAMYDIA and thats why i was gone. i guess her excuse worked because the teacher never asked again. the next year any time i saw that teacher in the hall she gave me a funny look but . i guess mission success? i never did have to take that final so. LOL

favourite thing i own - i have a set of lightsabers (yes im a star wars nerd (derogatory)) but also i have the ring from the lord of the rings! my precious truly.

if my life was a movie - i truly dont think my life is interesting enough to have an exciting title. i think the best i can come up with is "the underwhelming adventures of a crazy cat lady and her books". and thats just like abysmal so.

YOUR TURN!

do u have any pets?

fav fanfic trope?

do u have any weird talents?

whats your gas station order?

fav flower/plant?

fav planet?

and simply because now i have to know, most embarrassing thing youve ever done?

fav instrument sound? (like what sounds most pleasing to your ear)

and thats all! i eagerly await your responses and in the meantime ill be over here doing a little dance.🕺

-bee

bee hello hello hello 👋 i missed u <333

jegulus little women au ??? on god , sign me up for this right the fuck now. (& little women is genuinely so good. amylaurie truther 5ever>>>>)

(fic rec for u - no bright line by lady_grey - w/ sirius being an actor, remus being a historian & lily being the filmaker & matchmaker who fixes them up. james and harry are just there for the vibes honestly.)

tay tay -

sad beautiful tragic - JEGULUS - ‘long handwritten note’ - HELLO???? mr rab with the locket?? ‘kiss me try to fix it’ james trying to tell regulus to come and come that he’ll save reg , but reg already knowing he’s beyond repair. ‘for the life of us we can’t get back’ WHAT WHAT. they should’ve been happy your honour. ‘we both wake up in lonely beds in different cities’ the different places they wake up in especially during the summer holidays. ‘beautiful magic love there. what a sad beautiful tragic love affair.’ THEM THEM THEM THEY HAD SOMETHING SO SPECIAL AND THEY WERE SO TRAGIC.

the moment I knew- BLACK BROTHERS- i had to think about this one because I didn’t think anyone of my ships would betray each other like in this song. just not turn up or anything. BUT OF COURSE ! black brothers angst. i can just imagine sirius being like ‘bro i’m coming to your party bro’ & reg waiting but he doesn’t come because he’s getting smashed with the marauders. AHHHHH OH MY GOD NOW I’M ALL HURT. ‘your close friends seem to know when there’s something wrong’ - James being all ‘sup reg what up with u dude u seem a little depresso.’ i can just feel this song. very them .

the way i loved you - JEGULUS - i love this in the context of that jegulus had to break up and bartylus begins but then reg keeps thinking of james , like to me ‘frustrating intoxicating complicated’ is something reg would SO use to describe james. (ps - i’ve heard people use this for remus-grant in which it’s remus singing the song about sirius which i also agree with!)

now chatting time-

drarry ! i love them so much ! ‘harry had never been less interested in quidditch, he was rapidly become more and more obsessed with draco malfoy’ like BRO . i know what you are. ‘the boy who lived’ more like the ‘bi who lived’

and the personal dictionary thing is so real , isn’t it? it’s always like ‘ess check this’ ‘ess is there an a in definite’ ‘ess why is there a red line under this word’ .

and yes i agree red converse is very very james of me ! i love them so much they’re very dear to me. and green and black converse ??? very slytherin of you (i think the stars are so real of you #wolfstar5ever) i actually have a pair of stars converse !! on the little flap thingy , there is a little moon stitched on as well! when i saw them i was like ‘ i must own these’.

AND YES GREEK MYTHOLOGY FOREVER !!!! WE ARE THE BEST !!! the trojan horse was my obsession as a kid lmfao. i love that you took it to the next step though i could never do latin for so long ! (and i’m glad caecilius est in horto carries everywhere. it’s a staple of latin classes honestly.)

AND YESSSS saving lives is for cool people only ? are u a loser ? do you want to save lives ? if yes then u are no longer a loser ! (and nurses are definitely badass good on your best friend for opting for that)

(after the movies end i always be in the toilets staring into the mirror having an existential crisis like ‘well i’m gonna be in the mi6 now better get to training’ then the toilet flushes behind me and i get back to reality.)

little women ❤️❤️❤️❤️ (the 2019 movie >>>) ( and yes you must read iwwv that book changed my brain chemistry forever)

AND JUMANJI JUST SLAPS SO HARD HONESTLY!!! kevin and the rock together >>> . AND THIS YEAR’S APPRENTICE is on crack fr. if you watch it , you’ll notice there’s one guy who looks exactly like the hyde , honestly. and lord sugar saying ‘i hear you own a pest control business. any tips on how to get rid of piers morgan’ LIKE BRO YOU WENT HARD.

yes new york oh my god new york seems like the place that would make or break u. (not to mention that americans are a bit of a novelty here . like the candies , the cheetos the accents >>>) AND THE AMERICAN BIG GULP IS LIKE HUMONGOUS. HUGE . I must try it. (you have them in canada ??? that’s so cool)

RINGS ARE SO COOL. makes me feel all mysterious n shit , but i do too much lab work to handle wearing them all the time.

pop tarts & chinese takeout are simply superior. i don’t make the rules??

YOU HAVE CATS ??? I DON’T (yet. i plan on getting a black cat with green eyes. but a black cat) THAT’S SO SWEET AND AWESOME AND COOL AHHHHH. cats are so adorable honestly. (what are the kitties names ? i must know them and shower them with love from me !)

and yes INFJ !!! i love chocolate , but unfortunately i am not a werewolf so not totally remus. INTJ?? you little reg kinnie i see you there.

stars honestly i love them. light pollution is just so damning in london though. (and what??? that’s such a freaky coincidence oh my god !!!)

AND YES CHRISTMAS I LOVE CHRISTMAS !!! we did get snow last year but it melted pretty fast. We actually got frost a couple days ago , but not proper snow. i’m waiting for a real proper snow day again where the snow actually stays for ages. and lmfao you don’t get snow in canada ?? whenever i imagine canada i always think of three things - snow , maple syrup & mooses. it upsets me that not all of these things are everywhere in canada.

AND LMFAO NOT THE JAMES DOOR THING ??? it’s such a funny little thing because i see people bashing him for being dumb and opening the door and i’m like ‘guys.no’ (but he defo was wearing a costume.like that’s just the truth .)

your questions -

just enjoying the popular ships and not having a rarepair is so real of u. like yes i’m a basic bitch and i just want my jegulus + wolfstar. so what?? (and james & evan?? hmm never heard that before , i’m gonna have to check it out.) my rarepair is really really weird. brace yourself. it’s pansy x percy. i read one fic with them and i thought that was really cool so i think they’re sweet to read now and then! (the fic was the secretary by pacificrimbaud btw - recced by me but do read the tags for extra warnings ik not everyone likes that. it has wild child personal assistant pansy and rude controlling boss percy.)

not being to choose between them is so real . (me however ?? fuck james marry sirius kill remus. love u moonpie but mummy’s got a job to do.)

visiting places where movies got filmed is so surreal though isn’t it ?? and a lotr fan?? my mate’s one and she gave me the silmarillion to read for xmas . (it’s going to take me at least seven months to read because i read (1) page and got confused already.) AND VISIT LONDON YESSS !! very cool here usually , as long as you don’t bump into any roadmen. (I also want to go to italy and greece. Especially venice and athens >>>)

your fave books , i’m going through one by one

podg - isn’t ben barnes in the movie ?? so many edits i’ve seen of him with potd scenes , honestly i’ve got to read the book (& watch the movie of course , to sate my desire.)

‘name one hero who was happy’ & ‘ i am made of memories’ haunt me forever.

pjo is honestly so iconic. i’m waiting for the big old series to come out now.

IS THIS THE ONE BASED ON RON X GINNY FIC ?? like the one that goes ‘you’re my sister , my blood , i should want to protect you’ 😀😀😀 but i trust your judgement here bee!

never heard of this one. but i did just search it up , and the blurb is interesting so i’ve added it to my tbr !

hp did have my little year five self in a chokehold.

THE HUNGER GAMES OH MY LORD >>>>> peeta mellark and his baby bombs my god>>>

and soc ! i would read it except i have been spoiled for a certain chapter 40!

NOT YOU SKIPPING THE SPANISH CLASSES BECAUEE YOU DIDN’T WANT TO DO THE ORAL??? just say me llamo been and pass the exam 🤨🤨🤨🤨.now u got chlamydia too . and the teacher looking at you like ‘damn how she get chlamydia , this bitch be getting around.’

OMG LIGHTSABERS ??? i would so fight with them all the time that’s so so so awesome. (just looked up the lotr ring. it looks so elegant!)

ahhhh being a crazy cat lady >>>> (not abysmal cats beat people anyday.) my movie would be ‘drunk procrastinator’ because honestly i never do things on time and a little bit of sippy sip does release the stress sometimes. (the things i’ve done when under the influence will haunt me. my best friend has so much blackmail material on me .)

MY QUESTIONS —>

unfortunately not yet. but i do want to get a cat , so i’ll get on that asap.

when person a smells person b in amortentia , or when person a is given veritaserum and admits they like person b. i’m a sucker for that shit >>>

my weird talent is that i can eat an entire bowl of cereal in under ten seconds !! not useful at all , but it’s weird so yes , i consider it a talent !

i had to look up what a gas station was i got so confused. we call them petrol stations here so i was like ‘tf is a gas station’ BUT ANYWAYS! I don’t even have a car unfortunately, but my chauffeur (best friend) does and obviously i abuse the best friend privileges, and whenever he needs petrol i always get a pack of gum , a can of sprite (+ a diet coke for the driver man). (this is what you mean by gas station order , yes ? gas stations in canada don’t have restaurants in them right?)

favourite flower - poppies ! i adore poppies ! + lavender they’re so pretty // favourite plant - hyrdrangeas ! (they’re classified as shrubs so they count) very sweet and nice.

favourite planet - gonna be a real one and choose my gal pluto. she’s still a planet to me , okay???

i was at a funeral when i got a phone call . my phone was NOT on silent. and the worst part ? my ringtone was baby got back , so now the deceased’s family have a memory of ‘turn around stick it out even white boys got the shout , baby got back!’ in the middle of someone’s eulogy.

saxophone ! that shit RELAXING AS FUCK !

q’s for you to answer next time you come around -

what the fuck is putin (not the president)

unpopular opinion about the marauders

unpopular opinion in life

Dream car

do you watch the apprentice?

do you believe in soulmates ? (romantic or platonic?)

what’s your hidden talent?

Favourite villain ?

ever had your heart broken ?

ever broken a heart?

(bee you know the drill by now !! don’t be too long , I’ll miss you<333)

[casliveblog]

Custom Toonami Block Week 146 Rundown

Spy X Family: It’s the final episode of the dog arc! Man the dog arc has been a lot longer than I thought it would be given each main character got like one episode intro each and the dog’s had like three at this point. Thankfully Loid doesn’t kill the attack dog and is able to subdue him though he does lock him up and say he’ll come back for him but they never show him doing that. Anyway with the bomb gone and Dog Terrorist Bakugo fleeing the scene only to have his car fucking totaled by a single kick from Yor, the family’s able to reunite each thinking they saved the world today and each being kind of right. Anya expertly blackmails a government agency into getting to keep the dog and we get some nice character stuff for Sylvia, like she’s kind of a background character but this arc in particular has shown her a lot of depth. Once the dog finally gets there they give a heartbreaking montage of what he had to go through to this point to become a Data Dog and honestly yeah it’s a good One Piece style found family backstory told with no internal dialogue so that’s pretty dope. Turns out Anya’s plan of “get dog > befriend Damian> ??? > Profit” isn’t going to be so simple but still they have a dog and Anya’s as dumb as usual but she is really giving it her best to try and train him. They have a little adventure at the dog park and Anya gives him the non-copyright infringing name of Bond which is a bit on the nose for a spy family but I’m on record for loving the pun of their last name being Forger and having the dog that brought them closer together literally named Bond Forger is too good to pass up, it’s a dog that literally forges bonds, how can you not love that.

Inuyasha: So we interrupt the Princess Abi plot we just started last week to dive right into a special two part flashback about how Inuyasha and Kikyo met. I never really knew how to feel about this episode since some of the details feel off and even as a kid I could tell this was filler, so idk if I’d really consider the events of the special canon but it is pretty fun in a Star Wars Prequels kind of way because it’s just kinda watching shit happen and knowing it’s all gonna go horribly wrong by the end. We get some integration of other filler elements like Tsubaki’s tense relationship with Kikyo in that ‘that one coworker whose guts you hate’ kinda way and we get callbacks to Mistress Centipede being the original holder of the Sacred Jewel (though again I vaguely recall them saying it had actually been kept in Sango’s village until Kikyo came around so idk how exactly the details of that line up with canon but it’s more of a fanservice thing). Inuyasha hears about the jewel and he’s in the middle of his ‘doesn’t have a cool giant sword yet so he’s overcompensating for his half demon dick’ arc and because he meets Kikyo on the night he’s human he doesn’t do anything to provoke her and Inuyasha keeps coming after the jewel but a kind of begrudging respect forms between Inuyasha and Kikyo because Kikyo never kills Inuyasha and Inuyasha never resorts to underhanded tactics to try and get the jewel he basically jumps out every day and is like ‘fite me Kikyo’ and because this is pre-episode 1 Inuyasha she kicks his ass every single time. Still Inuyasha chides her about how smelly she is and she ribs him about being a half demon and they kinda roll into each other’s vulnerabilities because Kikyo feels like she’s in between worlds as well as the only teenage girl around that can obliterate an ogre by touching it and Inuyasha’s just kinda turned on by the ogre-obliterating I guess. They agree to exchange gifts and Kikyo actually prepares the Sit beads for him which explains why Kaede had them at the beginning of the series though we get a clue that her word would’ve been ‘Beloved’ which sounds a lot less spammable than Sit but is kind of more cold and cruel because she’s professing love for him and subjugating him at the same time which does kinda fit Kikyo’s character. Still Inuyasha presents her with the rouge that has a LOT more emphasis in Yashahime (even though I think it gets destroyed at the end of this special but don’t pay attention to that) and she gets the backstory about his mom and she’s moved enough to trust him to act without the beads now and doesn’t give them to him. And thus the two form a close relationship and nothing bad happens ever, the end. Also fun fact, was looking on the wiki to double check this was filler and not some side book written for a movie or something and turns out this is the ONLY episode in the entire original series that Kagome’s not in, kind of a neat touch also kinda funny how most anime have long stretches without their main character nowadays and Inuyasha’s just like ‘nope, Kagome in every episode except for the only one taking place entirely before she was born’.

Yu Yu Hakusho: Time for the end of Sensui, or at least I assume so given the episode’s literally titled ‘Sensui’s End’. So long story short Demon Yusuke kicks the absolute SHIT out of Sensui and supercharges the last Spirit Gun bullet to fucking blow him away. Yusuke gains control of himself again but is too late to do anything about it. Given this fight was probably the exact template for Ichigo vs Ulquiorra, Yusuke is pretty pissed about this outcome (not like ‘cut my arm off so we can fight fair’ pissed but still pretty pissed). Turns out Koenma resurrected Game Master as part of Sensui’s fucking Batman gambit to use his guilt to weaken the pacifier battery enough for him to overcome it and that means now he has no more get out of death free cards to give out which is probably fine because I get Yusuke not liking the end given he basically has a human death on his conscience now which is kind of what the whole arc was about but he had limited to no control over his actions at the time, basically the arc was leading to Yusuke getting a ‘I can kill for the greater good’ kill and instead they gave him a ‘got drunk and did some murder’ kill and it kinda sucks. Still like Koenma can probably do some shenanigans with his soul like they did Genkai, like Itsuki’s about to take his soul away so they literally can’t do that but they didn’t know he was gonna do that when they were discussing this. Sensui gives his big speech about how he never had demon friends like Yusuke does so he still had the Saturday morning cartoon morality even before he became a Spirit Detective and never had the main character talk no jutsu abilities to parse out why demons are doing shit (I hate to break it to him but it seems like 90% of demons are just kinda like ‘because it’s fun to kill’ like there are cool demons and all that but I don’t think the likelihood of the ones attacking him as a kid being like that was very high anyway), but point being he feels really shitty about murdering a Titanic-load of demons for shitty rich human assholes and wanted to die in demon world so he could like both get perspective and be some kind of martyr (it just so happens going to demon world also causes the apocalypse but DETAILS). But yeah Itsuki’s basically like ‘My gay ass is taking my self-loathing boyfriend’s corpse to another dimension because we’re not in the mood to put our weird convoluted motives on your morality spectrum’ also Sensui was gonna die in like ten days anyway, kinda random to throw in there, feels like just a random bit of tragedy to throw in for the fuck of it but at least they’re not like ‘oh he was weakened by the disease so Yusuke didn’t even fight him at full power’ no if anything it seems his death sentence hardened his resolve and made him fight harder so he could be put to rest. It’s just really funny how Itsuki’s simping so hard over Sensui he’s like ‘So my man almost caused ONE apocalypse, you guys taught him to murder terrorists so it’s your fault’ like I kind of get Sensui’s motivation by the end being so torn up by shades of gray and kind of half wanting to be proven wrong but Itsuki’s just sitting there so mad about these guys stopping a demon apocalypse and he’s gonna go take Sensui’s body and talk to it in the void forever I guess, also he somehow takes his soul too? Like I know the body and soul are linked recently after death but does Itsuki have the power to just grab the soul and keep it in the body to take to his pocket dimension and keep it away from Koenma? Either way once all that’s done Yusuke’s like ‘okay next arc let’s go kick my demon grandpa’s ass for ruining my fight’ and everyone’s just like ‘can we go have a nap first like we’ve been fighting ten episodes straight and the demon hole’s closing in a few hours we really need a break my guy’ and because Yusuke’s not the single-minded fight junkie that Goku or Ichigo are he agrees to go home with everyone and figure out the whole demon thing later.

Jujutsu Kaisen: Turns out Yuji’s job during the school festival is to be on ‘distract Todo Duty’ because fucking nobody wants to deal with that guy, which is fair, it’s like having Ichigo join your team solely as bait for Kenpachi (lot of Bleach references today) but yeah the two end up having a super manly fisticuffs fight where Yuji kinda gets his ass kicked before he answers Todo’s big ass tall girl question right and Todo has a whole ass slice of life flashback of ‘this is what you mean to me now’ constructing a friendship between him and Yuji in seconds and it’s fucking great. The rest of the Kyoto peeps show off the intros to their movesets and try to kill Yuji but Todo is not having that because if anyone’s gonna fist his new bro to death it’s gonna be him. Meanwhile the rest of Megumi’s group has figured out that literally none of the Kyoto peeps seem interested in the game they’re supposed to be playing and rush to help Yuji and start pairing off into their own little matchups for this arc which looks like it’ll be fun, like a lot of the characters seem cool but we really do need a Chunin Exams style arc where they beat the shit out of each other and cry about their backstories to really solidify this many characters because honestly we don’t have enough info on even the big players yet to really give them emotional cores. Todo stops fighting Yuji and says he wants him to become strong so they can REALLY fight and Yuji’s fresh off his ‘watched his domestic terrorist friend die because Yami Yuji’s a dick and he can’t punch peoples’ souls hard enough’ arc and really needs a win so we’re doin this folks.

Zom 100: So the first two thirds of this episode are like Aggretsuko on steroids, like I don’t want to say this isn’t real because I know this is based on real shit Black Companies do but Akira Tendo’s company makes all the ‘I hate Capitalism’ shows look like Muppet Babies (don’t ask me what that means idk) so I have to believe there’s at least some level of exaggeration in the intensity and/or scope if not the substance of the employee abuse in play here despite it being generally representative of Japanese Corporations just being fucking awful. But yeah if you’ve seen Aggretsuko you know the basic beats of how this goes, Akira has a shitty boss, shitty clients and a bunch of shitty coworkers with shitty practices that drain the life out of any employee protection policies with shitty Japanese work culture. He even has a bland moe big titty crush that only seems to like him because we’ve gotta get pairings going but she’s also banging the boss which that’s uhh… not great on several levels. But yeah, cutting to the chase assuming you’ve seen any ‘I hate Capitalism’ show (there’s been A LOT of them in recent years for some reason, no clue why…) Akira wakes up and finds there’s a zombie apocalypse and it’s kinda funny how he probably Shaun of the Dead’d his way through a lot of this shit before figuring it out. I also enjoy that it’s not necessarily like the nerd fantasy of ‘oh society has broken down so now I can be a king’, no Akira actually takes a pretty healthy approach to things despite his seeming lack of concern about the flesh-eating monsters everywhere and makes his day about emotional closure, he doesn’t revel in the collapse of society or the destruction left in the wake of the apocalypse it’s basically an eternal vacation that just happens to have zombies in it for him and I don’t fully know how long that outlook will last him but it is kinda neat seeing him Carpe the Diem and be so fucking happy about it. He quits his job, kills his boss (as you do), and confesses to his zombie crush with her titty hanging out (again, as you do) like I’ll admit I am a bit thrown by his complete denial of the world going to shit but I am excited for him and how he talks to the zombies like they’re still alive mostly for his own benefit for closure rather than any kind of philosophical reason, like it’s a completely angst-free zombie show and that’s like very strange, even High School of the Dead, as silly as the supersonic titties on that show were, had a good deal of angst despite its protagonists being invincible harem pieces, they still seemed worried about how shit was going down, Akira basically takes the Walking Dead approach of ‘yeah nothing really changed, still could die any moment, fuck it’, it’s like the meme of the nihilist saying ‘Nothing Matters’ while crying and the anti-nihilist saying ‘Nothing Matters’ with a big grin, that’s basically how I can describe Akira’s arc here, extreme anti-nihilism almost to a fault. But yeah, lots of fun, crazy colorful visuals to show how the new zombie world is Akira’s wonderland and I’m interested to see where this goes.  

Ranking of Kings: Now that everything’s good topside, Bojji takes on the mission of returning the chimeras that attacked Hilling to the underworld now that they’re not bad doggos anymore. I mean I’m pretty sure they have no idea Ouken’s been apprehended and there’s like four other Underworld fugitives they don’t have a pin on running around the castle but taking the doggos home is important too I guess. It gets kind of complicated since Domas is down there and the last time Bojji saw him he was literally trying to kill him so yeah that’s a bit rough. Meanwhile Domas and Kirito are down at the portal trying to seal it off but they don’t get to it in time I guess and the Underworld guards are there and Domas has to fight off a whole squad of them which he does, complete with ‘big guy that seems strong but goes down like the rest of them’ because that’s always a good way to spice up fighting mooks. However Desha comes through saying he wanted to fight Bosse now that he’s the size of a kid and Domas is just like ‘nah bro’ and it’s really fucking funny because Domas is trying to galaxy brain this fight by analyzing both their weapons and striking distances and Desha just kinda inches closer to him and kicks him in the nuts, like it ain’t that deep bro I guess. Meanwhile Gnasty Gnorc drops down to the Underworld (forgetting the doggos which is the whole reason why they’re here) with Bojji and Kage in hand and Bojji has a full blown Puss in Boots panic attack when he sees Domas again but Domas is just so happy that Bojji is alive he tries to do Sudoku to repent and Kirito’s just like ‘how about we just protect him instead’ and they fight for a bit before Desha takes out Gnasty Gnorc and says he’s just here to kill Miranjo because she’s the bitch that started all this and like he’s not wrong, I mean he plans on taking over the kingdom and 1v1ing their child king and shit but yeah Miranjo does seem to be the problem here though I have no doubt we’ll end up Talk No Jutsuing her though I have no idea how that’ll work given Bojji literally can’t talk but also doesn’t want to kill anyone so we’ll see how that shakes out.

Vinland Saga: Well turns out the thief girl from last episode survived and she’s now told Thorkell’s troops where Askeladd and co. are just as Thorkell’s getting antsy from the winter putting a cork in his murder spree, so now the timetable on them getting their butts in gear has been moved way up and the whole ‘slaughtering a whole village of innocent people to keep them quiet’ deal kinda fell through. Meanwhile, said deal is making the Priest feel kinda shitty about God and Canute’s like ‘fuck you, God is awesome, he’s the biggest Father and fathers are cool to their kids and shit’ right in front of Thorfinn who’s still dealing with his own daddy issues. Also turns out Canute is basically Sanji because he’s like ‘dad I wanna cook’ and his dad’s just like ‘COOK!? YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO FIGHT’ and Thorfinn gets his first meal in like probably a decade that doesn’t taste like overly salted slim jims from his king malewife. Meanwhile Askeladd’s crew is fighting with Thorkell’s scouts and they have to get the fuck out of dodge except the plan is to go FURTHER into England while also being chased by the English so Ragnar’s pissed about that and goes all Karen and asks to speak with Manager Askeladd. Turns out this was all part of Askeladd’s plan and they were really just leading him out to the front lines to stage his death so Askeladd can worm his way in and work on influencing Canute without Ragnar babying him. Ragnar tells Askeladd that in reality Canute was sent to war to die so that there would be no obstruction to his older, cooler brother taking the throne and the faction that supported Canute would fall apart and rally behind his brother. I’m no scholar for monarchys but does Canute really have any claim to the throne here like why is there a faction backing him at all if Herald is older and by birthright should be next in line and according to the weird Viking standards is better suited for the job when Canute’s main achievements are being REALLY Christian and pissing himself at the first sign of trouble? Feels like a reverse Ranking of Kings situation where the guy everyone wants for the job was next in line anyway so why was there any trouble. Anyway Ragnar dies and it’s really sad and Askeladd has to change plans and bring Canute into hiding because apparently King Dad wants to murder him for being a fucking pussy and if anyone wants to get anything out of saving the prince they have to make sure that doesn’t happen.   

[crowtongued]

💚 SHIPPING INFO 💚

ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSES SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.

Tagged by: @vastayan--vigilante

Tagging: @legendscried if you haven’t already been tagged and want to, I am too lazy to look. Anyone else who wants to.

1. WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER(S)?

I mean Alekt and Spy are obvious since they’re canonically married to each other otl. Best power couple.

If we’re talking about my other blogs though,

@th-ramblr: Again, Kytes and Reno are obvious because they’re also married and mates (*jazz hands @ them being wolf shifters*).

And for my canon muse blog, @49th-rabbitch, Lavi x Lenalee. They’re basically canon and I like to try and stick to being faithful to his canon material. I also have a rarepair of Lavi x Road as more of a tense/toxic thing. I just find them kinda neat.

2. HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?

I guess it depends. I’m not so much fussed about age gaps as I am about the people writing them and/or the content and how its portrayed, which I think matters more. As an example, if someone is basically titillating themselves off of adult x minor ships and finds that personally “hot” for instance, that’s different than someone who is willing to write it but is sensitive OOCly to how awful it actually is.

Think: The difference between “Lolita” and “The Suicide of Rachel Foster”. One is an exploration of bad events while being sensitive to the reality of the subject matter and still OOCly condemning the offender, the other is a blatant pro-pedophile narrative spun as “entertainment” that doesn’t even bother trying to hide how pro-pedophile it is, to the point of openly mocking the pedophile’s victim for committing suicide from the trauma.

That said, I will outright refuse to write anything involving a muse under 15 and usually for teen muses they have to be with someone of their own general age range (15 to 20 at most). Reason being that some of the universes I write in either have different societal standards (think medieval universes where people were expected to marry by 16, if not earlier), involve realistic criminal elements that I don’t feel like sugar-coating and pretending don’t exist (like human trafficking), or have characters that are that age range where I first got into those series and started shipping stuff when I myself was that age (Lavi being canonically 18-19 and Lenalee being 16) and I think its kind of dumb to pretend like 16 year olds don’t get together with other 16 year olds.

If I don’t know you well enough to make a judgment call about whether you’re actually capable of writing certain things without being weird about it though, my default for muses is 18+ at minimum. 20+ preferred. I will not make exceptions to this even if you ask me really, really nicely.

Also while this blog is not strictly 18+ for general interactions (Kytes’ blog is strictly 18+ though), I will not do any shipping or NSFW with actual real life minors. If you ask and you’re not at LEAST 18 years old, I will hardblock you. “I’ll be 18 in a few days/weeks/months” is NOT “close enough”. And there again, I prefer you to be OOCly at least 20+.

There probably won’t be shipping on this blog at all anyway though, so I don’t see it being an issue here.

3. HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW?

I’d say probably anything intimate that’s beyond kisses, cuddles, innocent touches, and “puppy love” things.

4. ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?

Extremely. I don’t trust a lot of people, and I generally don’t heavily involve myself with people whose main focus is NSFW/shipping ahead of any other proper development, even when it comes to canon characters lol

Unpopular opinion but my experience with people who are too ship-focused is that they’re fickle and only want to use other people to get off, but as soon as the shipping and NSFW stops they lose interest in the person behind the screen. Not here for that. I’m a ride-or-die bitch when I get involved with people. Sorry not sorry ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

5. WHO ARE OTHER CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?

None for my OCs. Alekt and Spy are married. Kytes is married to Reno (@legendscried).

Lavi is a bit of a hoe and very Bi and he doesn’t do “committed relationship” so he’d just as easily ship with most anyone as long as they don’t do the whole “feelings” game or try to make him only be with them.

6. DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?

Yes. Communication is everything and I don’t do spontaneous or forced ships. I’m also not here to just serve as peoples’ shipping fix for them to masturbate to and then leave. None of you are paying me enough lol

7. ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?

I honestly don’t care for NSFW ships. If they happen, they happen. If they don’t, just as well. Brotp type ships are awesome though. Give me all of them.

Basically I like characters who have chemistry and can work well together, but not really that into romantic or sexual ships. Friendships, family, found-family, rivals, enemies, frienemies, business partners. Give me all of those, yes.

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?

Out of my OCs, Kytes and Reno (@legendscried). They just have a ton of history and chemistry. Funnily enough, they were never supposed to get together and were planned to be more of a found-family dynamic but, welp, here we are.

9. FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?

Talk to me and communicate, most of all. Write with me. Plot with me. Generally just be a decent person and a friend who hangs around more than just to use me to get their thrills and then go.

I’m really not fussed to ship, particularly romantically or sexually. And I’m certainly not looking for people who want to hook up and be friendly and jump to NSFW a week after meeting. If you’re thirsty for NSFW, look elsewhere, cuz I ain’t your guy.

[lucemferto]

Hey girl, don’t mind me, I just quickly went and rewrote Dream SMP Season 2.

I’m focusing on the big plot stuff from Season 2, which makes it really easy for me to make it good, because I don’t have to contend with all the hard parts like dialogue and scene pacing and stuff. As an additional challenge to myself, I try to change as little as possible. If I don’t mention stuff (like the Egg-Arc) then that means I’m fine with them the way they are.

I wrote this in an hour, so don't expect it to be good, pls.

Whether you agree or think this is trash, I'd be so interested to hear your thoughts!

ACT I

Fundy’s early arc with Ghostbur, Eret and Phil is great and should stay the way it is. It sets up the character relationships and potential for conflict that we can explore in the future.

Similarly, I wouldn’t change too much about the conflict during Exile with one exception: Both Tommy and Quackity don’t want to include Technoblade. Instead, they believe that they can take one Dream by themselves – this is important for Techno’s, Tommy’s and Quackity’s personal journey later on. In this rewrite, Quackity also didn’t found El Rapids, but instead recruited George & Sapnap to L’Manburg – because his stated goal is to make L’Manburg the strongest nation on the server, so why would he make a rival nation with a plotline that goes nowhere?

What’s also important is that it’s revealed that Dream has a spy in L’Manburg around here. Maybe Tommy confessed his burning of George’s house during a cabinet meeting and word still got out to Dream. Who knows, but it’s important for later.

Something big that I would change about this Act I is that I would give Techno an actual B-plot. As it stands, Techno’s early plotline was just “Grrr, I’m angry that Tommy would use me like that! Someone killed my cows and robbed me! L’Manburg will know my wrath”

3 weeks later

“Nevermind, I’m a pacifist now and live in the arctic”

Instead, we pick up where S1 left off. Techno is intent on destroying L’Manburg and instituting anarchy. During that time, he comes into conflict with Quackity’s henchmen (Fundy, George, Sapnap, etc.) to establish that L’Manburg could be an actual threat to him.

We also have some conflict with Phil. They’re old war buddies, but Phil’s son built L’Manburg and Phil himself is unofficially Tubbo’s advisor. I think them reconstituting their friendship will take up this early part until Tommy’s exile – it makes for a nice foil to Tommy’s and Tubbo’s friendship falling apart.

Technoblade also tries to recruit people like HBomb and Niki to his cause, but they’re hesitant, because, you know, he sent Withers to destroy their home. Not the best first impression. Techno is hurt, but convinced it’s because of L’Manburg propaganda and they don’t want to work with him, because they don’t see him as useful.

ACT II Part 1

Exile-Arc basically stays exactly the same – with one notable difference. When Technoblade comes to visit Tommy it’s not to mock him – it’s as a final attempt to convince Tommy to join him. It’s a first culmination of Techno’s character journey so far: His previous interactions with the citizenry of L’Manburg has left him shaken, but not shaken enough.

Tommy truly does need “The Blade” right now and he has no reason to further believe L’Manburg’s propaganda. So, by Technoblade’s inner logic, Tommy should accept.

But he doesn’t. Tommy viciously rips into Technoblade and gets very personal (he’s in a bad space, understandably) – Techno can play it off nonchalantly, but either the cinematography or some later moment shows us that he was hurt by this.

Nevertheless, he gives Tommy a compass that points to his HQ, showing us that he cares about Tommy, like he did during their early days in Pogtopia.

This is where we implement some big changes. The story of Technoblade and the Butcher Army becomes the A-plot, while the Exile becomes the B-plot.

It makes perfect sense. The Exile-Arc is a very inward-focused, almost a character study of Tommy and Dream. It doesn’t have a lot of big narrative movement – so the perfect time to execute on that narrative movement in the storyline that has a lot of moving pieces.

So, after Tommy chewed him out, Techno is hurt and meets with Philza. Techno then explains that for him anarchy always was the natural order of things – to fight for a world where only the strongest survive – but pursuing anarchy like that has left him empty. Philza then explains that anarchy should be more about helping people and building an equal community.

We’re all but stating a major thematic conflict of this storyline: Fighting those who wronged you vs. Helping those in need. All this while also exploring the philosophy of anarchy with Techno and Philza serving as symbolic stand-ins for some different thoughts on the matter.

So, while Tommy’s Exile is going on, Techno refines his approach. This goes hand in hand with Quackity using his henchman to turn L’Manburg into a totalitarian police state in order to root out Dream’s traitor (told you it would become important later).

This will be the main conflict here in the first half of Act 2. Quackity and Philza will play shoulder-devil and shoulder-angel respectively for Tubbo and Fundy, pulling them in different directions. Ghostbur also hangs around L’Manburg – a constant reminder for Tubbo of the most sanitized version of President Wilbur and the lofty ideas he stood for.

This is another big thematic conflict for this storyline – externalized in part through Ghostbur’s presence: When do the ends no longer justify the means? It also feeds into the motif of Tubbo and Tommy becoming like Schlatt and Wilbur respectively (even if that’s still mostly superficial).

During this political turmoil, Niki is getting into Quackity’s crosshairs. She opposes his policing and brutal methods. So Quackity really focuses in on her and she has to live with constant surveillance, searches, etc. Niki tries to talk to Tubbo about this, but he says it’s necessary to keep L’Manburg safe. Slowly, Niki grows disillusioned with L’Manburg.

It is during this time that Niki gets into contact with Techno and the two start to form a bond and helping the citizenry hold out hope during this time (I don’t know who would be the citizenry, probably people that don’t have their own storyline going on such as HBomb, Vikkstar, Lazarbeam, etc.)

And we can have a few lorestreams like that, where the conceit is that Techno’s sneaking into L’Manburg to help people and there’s actual tension.

All this culminates in Hog Hunt. Fundy sees Phil, Niki and Techno team-up. He confronts them after Techno left and Phil begs Fundy to not out them – but their divide has grown too deep (and we’ve actually shown that during Fundy’s streams this time).

Quackity has Phil and Niki incarcerated (L’Manburg has a prison now, it’s not as good as Pandora’s Vualt). Tubbo is deeply disturbed that Philza and Niki would betray him by working with the man that took one of his canon lives and finally gives the Butcher Army his presidential approval. Quackity was already prepared and the events of Hog Hunt play out as we know them.

ACT II Part 2

Again, plays out relatively similarly, except for one major difference: Tommy comes to Techno with the explicit purpose of asking for his help. Exile has left him really hardened, probably more so than we have currently.

This would a.) make Tommy a bit more proactive in his partnership with Techno and b.) actually gives some weight to Techno’s later beef with Tommy, because now it’s based on more than just some flimsy phrasing during S1.

Otherwise, this plays out relatively similarly – Techno and Tommy maybe share a few more character moments, just to drive home that Techno cares about Tommy. Also, none of that dumb keeping it a secret whether or not we destroy L’Manburg – that’s some contrived nonsense and I hate it.

Tommy knows that Techno wants to destroy L’Manburg and while he’s conflicted, he ultimately goes along with. Once he gets his discs back, everything will be over after all. The destruction of L’Manburg will have been worth it.

Part of the rising action will be breaking Phil and Niki out of prison instead of the petty bullshit about Techno’s items that he doesn’t need. This is where we have the initial confrontation between Tommy and Tubbo (and Techno doesn’t ruin the moment by being his worst self).

Other plot points include: Techno receives the Wither Skulls over the course of him and Tommy working together by some mysterious benefactor. This is after he and Tommy confronted Dream. He doesn’t tell Tommy who the benefactor is, even though he knows (spoilers: it’s Dream).

Meanwhile, Tommy, Techno, Niki and Phil are secretly rigging New L’Manburg with TNT a la Wilbur, just to really drive that comparison home. Niki is getting really angry; she has suffered enough and she’s really gonna get revenge.

One of her big moments of terrorism before the Green Festival is burning down the L’Mantree (maybe we can include some character conflict Fundy, so we have these two people who were once really close friends now so warped and torn apart by these two sides at war).

Meanwhile, Quackity has figured out that Ranboo was the traitor and is pushing for Tubbo to execute Ranboo for the greater good of L’Manburg. Tubbo is hesitant, but as there’s no moderate voice in the cabinet anymore, he concedes to the idea.

Finally, the Green Festival is here. This part is really … tough to rewrite, because you have to accommodate so many different character arcs, but I’ll try my best.

In a move not unlike during the Red Festival, Ranboo is revealed as the traitor and put in the execution cage (because those parallels). Tubbo feels really bad about it.

This is when Tommy and Techno start their assault and unleash the whithers. L’Manburg is under attack and we have the big fight between Tubbo and Tommy. We get the big shout-out “The discs were worth more than you ever were” and the ensuing epiphany on Tommy part.

Techno’s calling for him to explode the TNT, but he doesn’t do it.

Quackity is calling for Tubbo to execute Ranboo, but Tubbo has an epiphany himself and refuses. Both their personal conflicts are resolved here. Also, we have some nice parallelism between Quackity and Techno as Tubbo’s and Tommy’s respective bad influences.

Techno – understandably this time – feels betrayed and hurt. He and Tommy have their shouting match. Quackity tries to attack Techno, but during their match they accidentally trigger the TNT. Quackity’s hunger for power has created the grave of his ambitions.

(Niki is also pissed at Tommy and Fundy is fully distraught, because L’Manburg was everything he had left from Wilbur).

Dream steps out of the shadows and reveals that he was Techno’s mysterious benefactor. He gets his hands on the second disc and gloats to Tommy. The scene from Doomsday plays out only that Techno shows some stings of remorse for helping Dream accomplish what he wanted. (Quackity flees the ensuing chaos).

Dream tries to goad Tommy with the discs, but Tommy doesn’t bite, because he has resolved his Want vs. Need now. Dream is frustrated, but retreats for now.

ACT III

In the aftermath of ACT II, I think it’s very important to hammer home that this wasn’t a win for Techno, Niki or Phil. For that to work I think it’s important to make clear that Tommy’s and Techno’s bond was genuine and that they really cared for each other during the Bedrock Bros thing. Neither of them is happy for how this turned.

Niki is plagued by nightmares and sleeps in a prison cell like in the current canon. She stands in symbolic for the emptiness that vengeance brings. Phil is shaken from his talk to Ghostbur and he’s the one who brings up that maybe what they did wasn’t for the best.

Then Techno and Phil have a discussion about the nature of anarchy again, calling back to that earlier conversation at the beginning of Act 2. Techno also feels empty – his vengeance and the destruction he wrought left him no happier.

Meanwhile, Punz and Tommy are actually spending some quality bonding time. Thanks to the medium, they could simulate that pretty well. Punz actually gets attached and when Dream mentions his coup-de-grâce, the cinematography shows that Punz isn’t too happy about it.

Tommy and Tubbo prepare to fight Dream on their own terms. They know, they have to stop him lest he hurts the people they care about (this makes both of them a bit more proactive in the finale). Punz (as per Dream’s orders) tells Tommy where Dream is hiding. Tommy thanks him, oblivious that Punz is a traitor, but Punz feels bad. He has grown attached to Tommy.

During the Final Disc War we actually get two perspectives: One is Tommy’s and Tubbo’s as we know it (only without the constant “Your discs or Tubbo”-stuff) and the other is Punz’s. He has decided to help Tommy even though there’s nothing monetarily in it for him.

First, he goes to Quackity, but Quackity says that Tommy has betrayed him and L’Manburg and that he gets what’s coming to him.

In a last-ditch effort, he goes to Techno. Here’s where we resolve that thematic conflict (Vengeance vs. Charity) for the Techno-Butcher Army storyline: Quackity has chosen to perpetuate the cycle of vengeance (because he will be the villain in S3), but we want some nice character development for Techno.

Niki is against it and stays put, but Techno and Philza ultimately decide to go with Punz and the others to help Tommy.

Finale plays out the same. Stuff’s still awkward between Techno and Tommy/Tubbo; they haven’t resolved all their problems, but it’s a first step. Some good set-up for S3.

And that’s my basic rewrite. It’s long and probably not the best.

[jadelotusflower]

It’s Cold in that Fridge: The Case of Nakari Kelen

Since The Case of Mara Jade has been doing the rounds again, I’ve finally gone back to this post that has been sitting in my drafts for literally years. So let’s honour this absolute badass who deserved better:

Once upon a time, the Star Wars universe was but six films (and a tv series) in the story of the Skywalker family. But beyond George Lucas’ story was an absolute boatload of books, comics, games, and other materials that made up the Expanded Universe. When Disney purchased Lucasfilm and the rights to the Star Wars saga, everything in this universe was decanonised and deemed “Legends” - some aspects of this universe were retained or re-purposed, others sit in Disney’s figurative vault and will likely never see the light of day (and seeing how the ST turned out, maybe that’s for the best).

But this transition between Legends canon and Disney canon was not so simple, because the nature of publishing meant that there were novels approved during the time of Legends canon that would be released in the time of Disney canon. In particular, there had been the planned trilogy “Empire and Rebellion”, set between A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back, with each novel from the perspective of one of The Big Three.  

Razor’s Edge (Leia) and Honor Among Thieves (Han) were released prior to the Great Canon Split of 2014.  But while the Luke-centric novel had been planned, it was not due to be released until well after the Split. So Heir to the Jedi (so called as an homage to the Legends progenitor Heir to the Empire) became one of the first books of the Disney canon.

What does this background have to do with Nakari Kelen?  Perhaps nothing, but I do wonder how the writing process was affected by the shift from Legends to Disney - was the novel a relic of the old EU with any reference the LFL storygroup didn’t like excised during editing, or was it a trendsetter for the new EU, a Sign of Things to Come?  

The most salient point being, of course, that Nakari Kelen - like so many love interests before her - was not allowed to go along her merry way at the conclusion of the novel, but was shoved into the fridge.

If there was one constant of the Legends EU, it was that Luke Skywalker’s love interests couldn’t catch a break. Mara Jade naturally lasted the longest relationship-wise, with almost twenty years of marriage to Luke before some bright spark decided she had to go (as per the aforementioned case study). But before Mara there was Jem, Shira Brie, and Gaeriel Captison (who came close to escaping the curse), and in the Legacy of the Force series they brought back sole survivors Akanah and Callista, only to kill them off for good too (and rather brutally, if I may add).

So perhaps when Kevin Hearne began writing HttJ within the confines of the Legends continuity, he was merely sticking to the status quo, or perhaps once subsumed by Disney they needed to make sure Luke's slate was clean (so to speak).  And I can’t put all the blame on Hearne since I don’t know whether it was his idea, or LFL mandated - but regardless it was a poor decision.

The root cause of fridging, imo, is limited imagination.  How best to cause your male protagonist pain if not kill off someone they love, or at least have strong feelings for? The answer is of course, easily. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

The Luke Skywalker of HttJ is fresh from his victory in ANH, a lieutenant in the Rebellion: young, not dumb, and full of...

Nakari Kalen is an absolute Queen a civilian volunteer and crack-shot sniper who loans her ship Desert Jewel to the Alliance. Luke is immediately attracted to her, they bond over a mutual love of fast ships and leaving behind desert home planets, and engage in the inexpert flirting of two nineteen year olds while also risking their lives several times over.

I want to make it clear: I actually really like this book. It's a breezy read, almost serialised as The Early Adventures of Luke Skywalker, and is ofttimes genuinely funny. And credit where it’s due to Hearne, many of of the supporting roles in the novel are female. Other than Nakari, there's Soonta, the Rodian who gives Luke her uncle’s lightsaber, Sakhet the Kupohan spy, and the Givin cryptographer/math genius Drusil Bephorin. In a genre where male characters are often the default for these kind of roles, it was nice to see, but makes the regressive fridging of Nakari even more egregious.

Luke and Nakari make a good team fighting brain-sucking monsters and Imperials, but more importantly they have fun together - she encourages him to work on his Force skills, and he successfully moves objects with his mind for the first time (leading to Nakari adorably dub him "a little noddle scooter"). It's a very sweet, if brief, relationship, and a respite from the danger of the mission. They spend the night together (leaving the reader to decide exactly what happened behind closed doors), and share a kiss before splitting up to try and escape bounty hunters. No prizes for guessing what happens to Nakari immediately after she received the Skywalker Kiss of Death.

I assume there were two motivating factors for why Hearne and/or LFL couldn't let Nakari live:

1. If she survived, fans would wonder why she doesn't appear in ESB/subsequent material.

I recall this bandied about on forums back at the time of the book's release, and to that I say - so what? Fans are always going to wonder, and try to paper over the gaps in canon, to make up their own headcanons to explain any any perceived inconsistencies. It's certainly no reason to kill someone off.

It is in fact possible for two young people to have a romance that just fizzles, or doesn’t work out for whatever reason - it should not require great maneuvering or explanation. If Nakari doesn’t show up in the next book in the timeline, what about it? The reader is smart enough to assume she and Luke broke up, decided to just remain friends, whatever. But it seems that the only way for a female character to exit stage left is for her to die, which is bullshit.

And actually, there's no reason why she couldn't have shown up again. ESB and RoTJ cover a month and a few days, respectively, of Luke's life - just because there was no mention of Nakari doesn't mean she didn't exist at that time, whether or not she and Luke were an item. She could have made an appearance in a subsequent novel, or Rebels, or the comics - she could have become a recurring character, showing up when the Rebellion needed her, or - heaven forbid - even have her own comic/book/show! Her existence in Star Wars canon didn't need to begin and end with Luke Skywalker, merely to service his plotline and backstory and abandoning the richness of her own.

No, the only reason Nakari had to die was to facilitate this:

It was a blow to the gut, realizing what that sudden absence meant. I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, but I had felt Nakari's life snuffed out through the Force, and into that void where she had shone anger rushed in - anger, and a cold sense of raw power and invincibility...I took a step to join in the hunt but stopped, breathing heavily, unaccountably sweating even though I felt so cold inside and the power of the Force roiled within me... I shook with emotion and power, and none of it felt the way the Force had before...I saw what kind of space it was , a black hole that would always be hungry no matter how much I fed it. I might never feel warm again if I didn't get myself under control.

Luke feels the dark side and is tempted by the boost of power it offers him, but immediately identifies it as dangerous and unnatural. I can understand why Hearne wanted to include this - it is a book of firsts after all: Luke's first solo mission, his first time using telekenisis, and ending with story with his first experience of the dark side makes sense. But it wasn't necessary, which leads to:

2. How to push Luke to touch the dark side without killing someone he has romantic feelings for?

Also, obviously, shite of the bull (or nerf, if you prefer). Even if this brush with the dark side was absolutely necessary for the novel's climax, there's any number of ways it could be achieved. At this point, Luke is fresh from losing important people in his life - Owen and Beru, Ben, and Biggs - lumping another death on top of that a narrative trick for Luke to react not only to losing Nakari, but the others as well. But it's cheap, the first card in the deck, and why not show a bit of imagination? Luke is young and inexperienced enough at this point that any number of things could be the catalyst - the whole book he's struggling with his growing powers, why not try and reach too far in the firefight with the bounty hunters, his anger and frustration with himself in not doing enough trigger the dark side temptation? It would work thematically and doesn't involve a fridging that ultimately has very little payoff.

Because Nakari is killed less than ten pages from the end of the book - afterwards Luke grieves, but ultimately chooses to honour her memory and be grateful for what he learned with her, recommitting to becoming a Jedi. It's all very surface level, and once again a female character's death facilitates a male character's development. Was it so imperative that Luke lost someone he cared about as part of this story? Sure, this was a time of galactic civil war, and it's far from unrealistic that these stories have a high body count, but who to make collateral damage remains an authorial choice, and in this case Nakari Kelen was (a) a female character of color, (b) a love interest of the protagonist - not just of this book, but the entire Original Trilogy.

I don't know to what extent (if any) race had to play in the decision. I'm sure there was a segment of the fandom absolutely livid that Luke Skywalker kissed (and maybe had sex with) a black woman. Was her death LFL hedging its bets, or demonstrative of the general lack of attention/respect they show their characters of colour?

In any case this was a chance to stand out from the old EU and it's fridge full of Luke's dead girlfriends, but instead they chose to introduce and kill off Nakari for the sole purpose of Luke's manpain and character development, and that's gross.

And then there's this:

A grisly yet reliable fact about custom bounty hunter ships is that you can always count on them to have body bags stashed somewhere for the easy transport of their kills. They often have built-in refrigerated storage, too.

NAKARI IS KILLED AND LITERALLY STORED IN THE FUCKING FRIDGE I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT I WAS READING.

I really hope this was unintentional on Hearne's part, because yikes. He was halfway there, this book was full of interesting female characters who had agency - Drusil in particular was a delight with her super math and inability to understand human interaction. Nakari was full of life and fun - capable but relatable, showing a different side of the Rebellion and those that suffered under the Empire's rule. Fridging her in her first appearance is considerably more vile, because it reduces her to a footnote of Luke's story, a plot device to Help Him Grow, rather than a springboard to tell more of her own story.

Because Nakari was a compelling character ripe for spinoff potential. I would absolutely have read or watched her continued adventures, juggling missions for her father's Biolabs company and trying to aid the Rebellion, shooting her slug rifle and cracking wise, maybe even finding a way to amplify her mother's song Vader's Many Prosthetic Parts to really stick it to the Empire, or try and free the political prisoners on Kessel.

The old EU was made great by allies and enemies of Our Heroes showing up again to help or hinder them, and/or branching out into their own material. We fell in love with them, and followed their stories even as they diverged from the main saga, eager to read more about their lives.

Nakari Kelen never got that chance. In many ways, she exemplified what Disney Star Wars was to become: an exercise in wasted potential.

[helion-ism]

What the hell is it with El/riels thinking that they know Sarah’s every motive?! The hell??

A post from an El/riel came up, where they showed a gifs of cats and explained what Gwynriels, Eluciens, Vu/ciens and El/riels are- apparently Gwynriels are the dumb and fake cat, who don't know anything about Sarah and always twist her words. Gwynriels, the dumb cat who mix fanon with canon and they "support a crackship". Eluciens are the other dumb but aggressive cat who does the same thing as Gwynriels do, but attack the poor Vu/ciens when they don't have the same oponions. Vu/ciens the adorable cat, who are pure and nice, know what's canon but are sadly underrated but so appraciated and protected by El/riels. Lastly El/riels are the smart and intelligent cat who only talk facts and know all the canon stuff in the books. They apparently know what Sarah wants, what her motives are and truly "know" that Sarah is an El/riel.

My, my... look who's talking.

Aren't they the ones, who created the infamous lightsinger theory about Gwyn- which is not canon?

Aren't they the ones, who created the "Azriel is Elain's true mate" or "Azriel is Elain's second mate"- it's not canon.

Aren't they the ones, who created the theory that Lucien casted a spell on Elain?- that is not canon.

Aren't they the ones who created the theory, that Elain will become the High lady of the Dusk court and Azriel the High lord of Dusk court or the prince of the Hewn City?- not canon at all.

Aren't they the ones who created the theory, that Elain is a spy or even a shadowsinger?- That is 100% not canon.

Aren't they the ones who claim the Elucien line "I can hear your heartbeat" and the Gwynriel line "A thing of secret lovely beauty" as El/riel?- bruh, there was no whisper of El/riel when these lines were said.

Aren't they the ones who spread lies about Elain hating Lucien and that she will kill him?- the hell do they read??

Aren't they the ones who literally scream, that Azriel's bonus chapter and Feysand's bonus chapter are all about Elain, when Azriel's chapter was about his feelings and when Feysand mostly talked about their baby? Damnit- not everything is about Elain!

And most importantly:

When the hell did Sarah ever talked about El/riel? WHEN? I'm sure you don't mean that one time where she literally said "Nah Elain and Azriel are like bro and sis". Sarah did not talk about Nessian and Elucien excitedly on Facebook, did not tell us that she wants to do a little mermaid retelling, did not have so many Pins of Elucien and mermaids, did not tell us where the ships (Feysand, Nessian, ELUCIEN) would like to go, did not confirm a singing Azriel and a frigging pegasus and did not make some beautiful Gwynriel scenes that literally beat the El/riel scenes for you to call her an El/riel.

What's not to forget that Sarah mentioned that she loves her couples to have conflict, history, spark and banter, banter, banter- LOTS OF BANTER. Gwynriel has that, El/riel doesn't have any of that. (Well- in El/riels eyes they apparently have a spark)

Aren't they the ones, talking about Sarah saying she literally can't say who the next book is about? Why the hell are they shouting that this confirms El/riel? Am i deaf?

But sure we are the ones mixing fanon with canon and twisting Sarah’s words.

I also find it funny how they say that Eluciens are aggressive, when Eluciens were the ones who got so bullied off the plattforms by El/riels. Idk about Vuciens tbh. I haven't interacted with one and haven't seen what they spread. I do know that there are Gwynriels and Eluciens who are so damn toxic, but this pointing fingers... I swear.

And Gwynriel is the one that is a crackship, but Vu/cien, the ship that barely had any scenes, is the ship that will 100% happen- because it benefits El/riel, right?

I might not be any better than them, but I just have to laugh at that post, I'm sorry. 😕

there is so much to unpack here.

I didn’t see the post, anon, so I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about. but I can only suggest you to simply ignore everything they say and block everyone who ships it. it’s a lot easier to not think about them when you don’t have to constantly see them.

at this point, I just don’t take them seriously anymore. they want to make stupid posts comparing shippers to cats for no reason but to offend people? let them. they were the ones to google every single cat breed and picture just to make their online friends laugh. whatever that means.

[thewanderingace]

Hawkeye 1x01 and 1x02 Reactions:

A loooooot of spoilers beyond this point.

A lot.

Beware.

Episode 1:

HERE WE GO!! I’M SO FUCKING HYPED!!

Omg is that Brian Darcy James!!!!

Shit this apartment is huge. They are definitely uber rich. Two floors. In NYC. Damn. Well they kept that fact accurate. Good.

Stark tower!!!

Hawkeye!!!!!!! Aww he saved her life without knowing it.

Omg it's the part where he crashes through the window!! The most badass Hawkeye scene in the Avengers!! I love it!

This title sequence is everything. Look at how badass kate becomes. Looove the aja art

LOL KATE! Can't pick the lock so she scales the building. And then destroys the clock bell tower 😂

JACQUES DUQUESNE!?!!!!!! SWORDS ON THE TABLE!!! FUUUUCK!!  ITS THE SWORDSMAN!!!!

Definitely need to double check Kate's background in the comics. Did she grow up rich??

CLINT!!! MY LOVE!!!!

Omg hes seeing Roger's the musical

This musical is straight up destroying me. This is hysterical. I need the whole album

YAAAAS HIS HEARING AID!!! MCU CANON HOH CLINT!!!!!

Awwww no his face when Nat shows up in the musical.

Lila I love you.

Aww the little girl waving clint dressed up as Nat

Lol at the bathroom scene. Dude read a room.

Oooh babe. How clint kneels on the ground outside to catch his breath

Love how worried lila is for her dad and how smart she is. "We all miss her but she was your best friend"

Aww they all decided to leave early

Dad Clint is everything to me. THEY ARE STILL A HAPPY FAMILY AND I MIGHT CRY

Ooooh the waiter comping his meal and thanking him for saving the city. His face. He feels so guilty still. Oh babe.

Kate looking fine in her tux. Very nice.

LUCKY!!!! ITS LUCKY!!! HI BABY!! THE BESTEST BOY! I definitely squealed at his appearance.

I love Clint and his family. They're all so happy. Hes so happy to be with them. Why isnt Laura with them. Are they still together?

Kate going all super spy lol. Love her. Love it.

Shit what the hell is this auction.

RONIN SWORD!!!

RONIN COSTUME!!!

THE TEACKSUIT MAFIA HAS ARRIVED!!

AHHHHH THE SAID BRO!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

THEY KEEP SAYING BRO

IM GONNA DIE

ITS PERFECT

LUCKY!!!! GO LUCKY GO!

Kate saving lucky!

Omg Clints face at seeing the Ronim costume again. Help me

Kate's apartment is perfect

PIZZA! SHE'S GIVING LUCKY PIZZA! LUCKY THE PIZZA DOG HAS ARRIVED! "Oh you like pizza"

Ahhhhh!!!!!!

Oh shit Armand has be murdered. 10,000 dollars it was Jacques

Tracksuit mafia are back!!!!

"BRO! BRO! BRO!" ITS HAPPENING!! THEY DID THE THING!!!

CLIIIIIIINT!!!!!!!!!!!

THEYRE MEETING!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Episode 2

Kate fangirling in front of Hawkeye is perfect. Just babbling and being struck dumb in front of her hero.

Hawkeye being so..."shit" at seeing that it's a kid wearing the suit

Clint being extra vigilant

"Can you sign my bow"

Clint has previous dealings with TSM!

Lol at Kate's reaction to the tracksuit mafia's name

CLINT! BADASS! Catching the cocktail and throwing it back

Clint and Kate's interactions are so perfect I love it

LOL Clint shopping for first aid supplies!

Love Clint slipping into her place dressed as a firefighter

Omfg a larp sticker!? A firefighter is a larger and he stole the suit right!? Right!?

Lol I love that brand of pizza kate is using as an ice pack

Awww Clint teaching her how to take care of her wounds. I love it

Called it! Larper took the suit

Awwww CLINT AND LUCKY BONDING!!!!!

Clint is so good with his kids. And I love that Lila sees through his crap and the Clint is like "I said cooper was in charge but you are amd ways will be". "Dont lose Nate. Where's Nate?"

Ahh Nate knows sign language for his dad!!

Clint better make it home for christmas I swear to God

Lucky and pizza again!!!

Roger's the musical is on the tv!! 😂

"You're not gonna listen to me are you" "I want to but no"

Extra vigilant and protective clint again as he walks Kate to workI love to see it!

Ahhhh she asked about his hearing! Hes walking on right bevause he cant hear otherwise!!! He didnt really answer how ot happened. Just a montage of all his hurts. I liked that but was there an incident!?

Lol the superheroes on the street scene! "You're problem is branding" ppffft!

Aww they exchanged numbers and kate made sure she had his. Lol

Bishop Security!? Damn

Jacques is so slimy. I hate him so much. Get him Kate.

HAHAHAHAHA CLINT AT A LARP EVENT!!! THIS IS EVERYTHING!! THE SWORD FIGHTS WHERE HE LOOKS SO ANNOYED THE WHOLE TIME!! THE DUEL!! I LOVE IT

"I found Thanos"

Aww he made a friend. I like you Grills. He was so excited to beat Hawkeye in battle and that he gets to call him Clint. Adorable

OH THANK FUCK!! Laura and Clint are still together and happy. Jeezus that scared me. God I love her. Shes so happy and supportive and helpful and loving and hes so open and honest with her. I could die of happiness right now.

Oooh hes gonna do a Nat move. Now I wanna cry.

GET HIM KATE!!! KICK HIS ASS! OH SHIT WAIT YOU WON'T BECAUSE HE'S THE FUCKING SWORDSMAN!!! OH SHIT THIS IS SO SEXY AND AMAZING

OH SHIT A BUTTERSCOTCH!! DOES HE KNOW?!!??!

LOL oh that didn't have the "you should have brought more guys. Oh you did" like in the trailer. Still so good. They nailed the TSM

Kate! 😂

"Bro I found her"

ECHO!!! ITS MAYA!!! AHHHHHH

Summary: 

Omg they kept so many comic things I could cry. I really really enjoyed how they wove in comic details into the mcu. It was so good.

Hailee is the perfect Kate

Kate and Clint’s banter is perfect

Lucky is the bestest boy ever and i love him

Clint’s family is so good and i love them all so much. If the show ends with Clint finally retiring and being able to spend Christmas and forever with his family on the farm I can die happy

Speaking of, a “dad weekend in NYC” is ADORABLE

Also I love that Laura and Clint have such a healthy relationship! She’s supportive and loving and understanding. He’s open and honest with her about everything. I love them. SO much.

The Tracksuit Mafia was PERFECT!!!! OMG as soon as they said “bro” i died.

Can’t wait to see if the mcu keeps Clint’s connection with Jacques

Kate’s fangirling was perfect. I love her

The larp!! Clint doing larp!! I LOVED IT!! Just the quiet “I fought Thanos” was hilarious but I also loved how he told Grills he can call him Clint and now they’re friends and it made that guys dad. Love it.

The way the show depicts Clint’s ptsd and survivors guilt was wonderful. It was subtle at times and other times you can really see how much he’s struggling. The zone out when broadway Nat dances, how he had to leave the theater and kneels on the carpet outside, the waiter comping their meal for saving the city, seeing Ronin on the news, using Nat’s plan of “being bait”. 

DEAF CLINT BARTON!!! FINALLY!!! WE FINALLY HAVE DEAF CLINT AND I’M SO HAPPY!!! God it was great! The hearing aid, him turning it off and on, walking on Kate’s right side all the time, the reason for the hearing aids being years of being too close to explosions. Just all of it. LOVE IT

[oswaldsleftbicep]

Happy birthdayyyy 🎈🎈🎉🎉🥳🥳 hope you have a nice life, I love your writing!!

Appearance: black hair and black eyes with big dark circles which makes me look sick or depressed lol

Personality: I'm curious, maybe even nosy sometimes lol. I talk to a lot of people but only trust one or two. I'm dramatic, loyal, emotionally intense and I cry very easily. Open minded and emphatic, but I'm good at hiding how I really feel. I'm an INFP.

Likes: I like nature and animals, candys, traveling, romantism, comedy, music, rain, painting, writing and philosophy.

Dislikes: being ignored, rude or cold people, feeling pressured

wait we sound like the same person hold on--

anyways lol i ship you with...

Lucas!

❧ what is it with me and shipping everyone with lucas i'm so sorry lmao

❧ he's lowkey concerned about your dark circles, he just wants to make sure you're getting enough good rest and that you aren't stressed; if they're natural and just,, there then he'll back off a bit but still check in every now and then, just to be sure

❧ i think it's canon that this man is a gossip, he'd be totally nosy with you. he'd come to you whenever he finds out a juicy new secret about whoever it is he's spying on this time. if the two of you are in public and there's a couple or group of people nearby in a heated discussion, he is not above moving the two of you closer so you can eavesdrop on what's going on. he'd also like playing that game where you people watch and make up stories about whoever you see, it's so fun. if he's in your world and you happen to have a school yearbook he'd want you to go through all the people and spill everything you know about them, from what clique they were in to that one embarrassing thing they did in tenth grade that no one's forgotten yet

❧ he's kinda in the same boat you're in with knowing lots of people but only trusting a few. he takes solace in the fact that the two of you can at least trust each other wholeheartedly with anything. he'd come to you first with whatever is troubling him before anyone else even catches wind that something's up with him

❧ this ties into the fact that you're loyal; he loves that about you, it's more reason as to why he trusts you so much. it's especially helpful in that he's pretty much seen you with every other love interest in nightmare as he's lived through multiple universes. your loyalty give him piece of mind that you won't leave him for anyone else, that he's the most important person to you in this universe

❧ he finds your dramatic and sensitive sides very endearing, and he can handle them quite well. he knows when he should talk you down from whatever you're feeling through rationalizing the situation and when he should gas you up by supporting and further validating your feelings. for example, if you're getting worked up over something like a random guy being rude to you in town, he'll support you by saying you have every right to be upset but calm you down by reasoning that you'll likely never see him again and he's not gonna keep a dumb grudge against you, so why should you hold one against him? or if you're just venting out some collective frustrations and don't want advice from him, he'll agree with everything you're saying and make little comments like "ugh i cannot believe they did that.. nuh uh, no ma'am.. as you should" stuff like that. he reads situations well and knows which technique or combination of techniques to use in a given situation

❧ he loves how you're so open minded; it's a good and respectable trait to have and he feels so much safer and comfier around you knowing that you're not one to judge someone based on their differences

❧ he also loves low much you feel, with you being so empathetic and sensitive, he thinks it's beautiful in a sense. i feel like he'd be one to keep a majority of his emotions internalized, so seeing you be so open in showing your emotions is refreshing for him and he wants to know all about what you're feeling, what caused those emotions, what he can do to help if the emotions aren't necessarily good ones. he can tell when you're hiding what you really feel though, he's great at reading people. he won't call you out on it immediately, he'll just kinda squint his eyes at you slightly with a look like he's trying to read your mind. he won't make you say what you really feel, he'll never force you to do anything, but he does let you know he'll be here for you no matter what and encourages you to be honest and open with him

❧ he's a nature and animal lover too, and he knows all the good places to go if you wanna see a really pretty meadow or a family of deer prancing about. he'd be down to get a pet or two with you if you're interested in having some animal friends around the house, but he'd be partial toward ones that can accompany the two of you when you go traveling

❧ he doesn't have much of a sweet tooth himself, but he'll keep jars of candy around his house for you. whenever he goes out for whatever reason he'll always return with a new bag of your favorite candy and some you haven't tried yet that he thinks you might like. he'd even look into candy making, seeing if it's something the two of you to do at home

❧ he's got a very interesting outlook on life, so philosophy is something that the two of you debate and ponder a lot. his favorite time to do so is when it's a rainy day out and neither of you are doing anything in particular, and he'll just ask a question aloud or just start voicing his thoughts on a subject that's been on his mind lately. the two of you are respectful to one another's views and always wait for the other to finish before chiming in. there's just something about the ambiance that makes him all philosophical and makes his head spin with all these thoughts, and he's grateful to have you with him to spill these thoughts to and turn them into meaningful conversations. i can just picture the two of you on a comfy couch, him sitting in a slightly reclined position and you lying down with your legs resting on his lap, his hands rubbing them mindlessly as he explains everything that's been on his mind

❧ he'll never purposefully ignore you, and he's always mindful to treat you kindly and with respect. he may have his moments where his temper gets the better of him, but he's quick to catch himself, apologize, and fix his behavior. he also knows how sensitive you are to pressure and takes extra caution to make sure you're as relaxed and stress free as possible