#I know it’s a joke I just love taking everything to the logical extreme

[fluffydice]

“Normal people are complicated…” Kusuo sweetheart, while I don’t disagree you also have to remember that your parents are actually fucking insane

[lecliss]

I'll never be able to take the theory that Vincent is Sephiroth's real father seriously cuz I cannot stress enough how important I think it is to the plot that Vincent wanted to fuck Lucrecia and did not get to.

[hyunniesgirl]

Bad intentions | Part 2

Pairing: Han Jisung x afab!reader

Summary: you thought you could turn Han Jisung into the perfect boyfriend material so you can get revenge on your cheating ex. Little did you know that you would end up getting much more than just a guy to show off.

Words count: 13,668(Idk don't look at me)

This content is +18 ONLY, minors do NOT interact!

It's advised to read part 1 before this one for context and better understanding of the plot.

Part 1 | Love is a mess: series masterlist

Warnings: dry humping, handjob, fingering, cursing, pet names(baby, pretty), oral(f, m receiving), unprotected piv(for the love of god don't do this irl), jealousy, angst, fluff

A/N: here I am again, procrastinating what I should be doing just so I can take this fic out of my head. Hope you guys like it ❣️

Seunghoon was never one to do acts of service, he would tell you he loved you and even though you didn't always believe that, that's what he offered and you just took it. You always thought that that was everything you deserved, better a bit of affection than no affection at all.

So you didn't expect to find Jisung waiting for you the next morning. He's outside of his car, scrolling on his phone, leaning against the vehicle.

You close your front door slowly, like he can just disappear if you make any hasty movements. As if Jisung can feel your presence, he lifts his eyes looking in your direction, smiling and waving to you.

“Fancy seeing you here”, he jokes, tilting his head when you come closer.

“In front of my… house?” You ask, smiling and he shrugs, embarrassed. He didn't really think it through, he just got into his car and when he realized, he was in front of your house.

“I just thought we could go to school together”, he kicks a rock on the ground, losing confidence, “but it's okay if you don't want to”

You step closer to him, taking his hand into yours and interlacing your fingers. That sudden electricity from before running through all your body the moment you touch him.

“Maybe you can convince me”, you tilt your head, biting on your lower lip while looking at his lips, looking extremely kissable.

“How?” His head snaps to look at you, following your gaze and understanding what you're suggesting. He feels his ears warm, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling your body closer to his.

Jisung kisses you, the warmth of his touch spreading all over your body. His tongue brushes against your lips and one of his hands slides through your hair, pulling it lightly.

You open your mouth slowly, too intoxicated by his scent to think clearly, putting your hands on his hips, sliding up just to find his deliciously small waist that you could never notice with the baggy clothes he wears.

“Well, you're full of surprises, aren't you?” You say when you two finally part the kiss.

He frowns, looking at you breathless.

“Shall we?” You ask, pointing at the car and he nods, turning around and opening the door for you. Before going in, you look at him, a playful smile on your lips. “You'll get me to do a lot of things if you keep using these means of persuasion”

For the first time in your life you don't want the spotlight to be on you, you feel uncomfortable being the center of attention. You know exactly why people are staring when you arrive at school with Jisung.

You wish you were being judged by showing up with a new guy barely a month after breaking up with Seunghoon, but that's not it.

People are looking at Jisung, you know they are. You don't mind the snickering comments or the idiotic jokes directed at you, but you don't want him to go through that.

“Should we have lunch together?” He asks you, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“Actually, I don't know if I'll have lunch today”, you lie. If you think logically, you should try to stay away from him at school. Maybe people won't target him if you do that.

“Do you want me to take you home after school, then?” He asks, frowning, finding your sudden change of attitude strange.

“There's no need, I have practice”, you avoid his eyes, ashamed of yourself.

You're an idiot, you shouldn't have made such hasty decisions. You should have thought about how mean people would be to him if you brought him into the spotlight with you.

Jisung feels his stomach sinking in and he can't help but take a look at himself, he never really cared about the way he dressed. He wears anything that he finds that's clean, not worried about looking good or fashionable.

He has always been the smart guy, the one who has no care in the world other than the things he has his eyes set on and that has always been his studies and music.

His family was shocked when he chose a career in music since he could do anything else. He has the brains to choose any path that had success guaranteed but he chose something as uncertain as a career in the music industry.

He did end up being successful anyway, after meeting his friends and forming 3racha, it didn't take long for them to land a contract with a big label. The three of them stayed in college though, each for a different reason.

Looking at you though, you're very different from him. You worry about your image and what people think about you. If he looks at you, from your hair to your shoes everything is matched to perfection. You're always nice with everyone, even with the people you know talk shit about you and you still keep your grades up.

So why, someone who worries so much about her image would want to be seen with someone like him?

He never worried about his clothes or being popular, but now? He's very worried about those exact things. If you end up dating him, how will people perceive you? You're the center of attention so the person who's dating you, automatically will be in that same center.

Jisung decides to wait for you after practice, he knows you told him not to, but he knows that if he stays in his head, he'll go crazy – thinking about all the worst case scenarios where you're going to dump his ass anytime now just because he's not popular enough.

You smile when you see him but it dies down a few seconds later, when a group of girls from your cheer squad walks past you, laughing about something.

“Hey”, he says when you get closer.

“You didn't have to pick me up”, you say awkwardly, hoping he didn't hear what those girls said.

“Yeah, but I thought you would be too tired to walk back home-”

“It's just a short walk”, you tell him, pressing your lips in a thin line. He stares at you for a moment, frowning, debating in his mind if he should say something about your strange behavior and knowing that if he doesn't, it will eat him alive.

“Y/N?” He starts, voice too serious, “are you embarrassed because of me?”

Jisung really doesn't want to hear your answer, it would crush him if you said yes but he has the slight hope that you will deny it.

“No! No, absolutely not”, you shake your head frantically. He feels a huge weight being lifted off his back but at the same time, he still doesn't understand why you were acting like that.

“But then why-” you cut him mid sentence, taking a deep breath. Bold of you to assume that a person as smart as him wouldn't notice how you were acting.

“People can be really mean”, you tell him, “I'm afraid you're going to go through a hard time because of me”, you pout, feeling like crying. What if he agrees with you? What if he doesn't think you're worth the trouble?

“Why would you think that?” He searches for your hands, holding them and pulling you closer.

“If you date me, people are going to talk about you and I don't want you to hear the same things I have to”, you tell him, honestly.

Popularity is great, you love the attention but it has its downsides. The amount of times you had to listen to people talking shit about you in the restroom, when they didn't know you were there, is wild. You lost count of how many times you walked in on a conversation of someone talking something bad about you and you had to pretend like you didn't know.

You don't want Jisung to experience that, he's invisible now and he enjoys that, it's not fair that you would take him out of his comfort zone just to date you.

“What about you?” He asks, making you look at him with a frown. “You don't care that I don't know how to dress and that I’m basically invisible?”

You smile. Against your better judgment you don't, you really don't.

“I mean, if you could just let me take you to a hairstylist”, you say, lifting your hand to his face and brushing his hair to the side. “I really want to be able to look at your eyes while talking to you”, you joke.

“Ouch”, he puts his hand on his heart, pretending to be hurt. “I don't care what people say about me, okay? I only care about what you think”, he informs you, as if he didn't make that clear already.

“Are you sure?” You ask once more, giving him a chance to escape, even though you don't want him to.

“I am”, he nods, pulling you even closer and wrapping his arm around your waist. “So, can I have lunch with you from now on? And take you to and back from school? Hm?”

You nod, smiling happily.

“I'd love that”

You decide to let people talk, if Jisung doesn't care about it then neither will you, and let's say that after that conversation things just got hotter between you two.

Classrooms, cars, under the bleachers, the locker rooms, there's no place where your makeout sessions didn't reach. You just can't really behave yourself in his presence, when you two are alone you just have to touch each other and after that you just can't help what comes next.

Everyday. Before, between and after classes you're all over each other. You're covered in hickeys, your hair is always a mess and lipstick just won't last on your lips for long. Jisung is no better than you, the only difference is that he can hide the love bites more easily and his flustered face is less noticeable than yours.

You are both in his car trying to get to the restaurant before one of you yields and try to touch the other, when his phone rings.

“Hey”, he says, putting on speaker while he keeps driving.

“I’m sorry to call, I know you're on a date”, you hear Chan's tired voice on the other side of the line, “but my laptop died for whatever reason and the song we prepared to send tomorrow morning was there, I didn't have time to make a backup”, he sighs.

“We lost everything?” Han asks, panic in his voice.

“No, we have the unfinished version on Changbin's laptop but we lost what we worked on yesterday”, Chan explains and Han nods, even though his friend can't see him.

“Okay, yeah, I can go there and-”, he stops mid sentence, looking at you puzzled. “You are out of the city, right?” He asks Chan.

“Yes and Changbin has a test tomorrow, he won't be able to do it”

“Can I go to the studio with you?” You ask and Han nods, confused. “Then we are going to be there soon, Chan, don't worry”, you tell.

“Thank you”, Chan sighs, giving his goodbye and hanging up.

“Are you sure?” Jisung asks, watching you pick up your phone in your purse.

“Yeah”, you shrug, “we can have dinner in a fancy restaurant another time”, you say, calling the said restaurant so you can cancel your reservation.

Jisung watches you talking calmly with the restaurant, feeling grateful, you didn't have to be so understanding.

“Should we order some fried chicken?” You ask, after hanging up, “unfortunately they won't give us a refund”

“It's okay”, Jisung chuckles, “and I'd love fried chicken”

“To tell you the truth, fancy stuff is not my cup of tea”, you tell him, “I much rather have some chicken and beer”

“Well, my lady”, he smiles at you, “luckily for you I know a great place that sell exactly those things”

You watch Jisung work, he looks so professional while doing whatever he's doing. He's focused, a few strands of hair falling slightly over his eyes. His hands work fast, mixing, going back and forth and fixing different parts.

You sit there on the couch, waiting for him to finish. One, two, three hours go by. It's one in the morning when he sighs, closing the laptop and turning his chair towards you.

“Are you done?” You ask, hopeful and Jisung nods, standing up and walking to the couch, sitting comfortably on your side, resting his head on the back of the couch. Eyes closed trying to rest his eyes. “Did you make a backup?” You tease, watching him open his eyes slowly, turning his head to look at you.

“I did”, he chuckles, “and sent the backup to Changbin and Chan too”

“That's good”, you tell him, snuggling closer.

“Sorry that we didn't have a proper date”, he says.

“Don't be sorry. I think this is great”, you shrug, “I had good food and got to see you looking hot while working, that sounds like a win win for me”

Jisung laughs, shaking his head to your antics.

“Still, if there's anything I can do to make it up to you, just let me know”, he tells you.

That's when you realize Han Jisung doesn't know you at all, this man shouldn't give someone like you an opening like that.

“Oh, in that case”, you bite your bottom lip. “I have some ideas of how you can make it up to me”

You lean closer to him, face centimeters away from his.

“You could start with this”, you give him a peck on the lips, “and then you can go down here”, you kiss his jaw, going down to his neck, “then you can use your imagination here”, you suck on the skin that already has purple ish marks fading away.

“Is that right?” Eyes darkening, his hands land on your hips, pulling you closer.

“Mmn”, you agree with a shit eating grin on your face.

“And what about this?” He grabs your hips, bringing you to his lap. Your cheeks grow hotter, he's so much more bold than when you started seeing each other. “Do you like it?” He tilts his head, brows arched and a smirk on his lips.

“Where did the guy that freaked out about the thought of receiving nudes go?” You pout, you hate that he can so easily get you flustered.

Jisung throws his head back, chuckling while looking down on you. He tightens the grip on your hips, pressing your body closer to him. You can feel something hard beneath you and that doesn't help you at all, your face growing even more red.

“I had to change my approach when I realized you like to tease”, he brings his face closer to yours, “but you have no experience with being teased”, he smiles, seeing your breathing halt. You're cute.

He kisses you, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you closer, rubbing your aching core on his hard on. You gasp, feeling the sudden stimulation but he keeps his lips on you, tongue brushing on yours slowly making you dizzy.

Jisung slides his hands to your thighs, pulling your skirt up so he can grab the flesh of your ass and squeeze it.

“Hannie”, you whisper, feeling his cock pressing against your clothed clit, making the knot in your lower stomach grow.

“Hm?” He asks, Jisung just loves when you use that nickname to call him. “Are you enjoying yourself, pretty?” He teases and you nod, moving your hips on your own, chasing your high.

You look at Jisung, brushing the strands of hair out of his eyes, biting on your lower lip before kissing him. You look so majestic riding him, he has no words so he tries to show you how turned on he is by kissing you with all the lust he has in himself. Hands on your hips forcing you closer to him, stimulating you more.

“I-I'm c-close”, you struggle to say, feeling all the heat spreading all over your body as you bend down and bite his shoulder to contain the loud moan you let out.

Jisung wraps his arms around your waist, snuggling his face into your neck and leaving kisses on your sweaty skin. You're kind of embarrassed, you didn't think you would be doing something like that in a place like here.

“Next time let me hear you, yeah?” He teases and you groan, slapping his arm.

“No, what if someone heard me?” You protest and he smiles, brushing your hair behind your ear.

“There's no one here at this hour”, he reassures you, “but anyone that ever heard you moaning should thank you, baby”, he gives a peck on your lips, biting your bottom lip.

“You didn't finish, right?” You sigh, closing your eyes to the feeling of his cock still hard as a rock beneath you.

“Don't worry about it”, he shrugs, “I got to make you cum, that's enough for me”, he smirks, too proud of himself but you have your own pride, no way you're going to let him see you like this and not do the same.

“Can I touch you?” You ask, getting out of his lap and comfortable by his side on the couch, waiting for his answer so you can unzip his pants.

“You don't need to feel obligated”, he says but clears his throat when you glare at him, “yeah, you can”

You waste no time, working on opening his pants and pulling his underwear down to see his painfully hard cock, he's bigger than you thought he would be. You feel your core throbbing once more, just thinking about how you're going to make him fit inside you, that won't be easy but you're sure you can manage.

You grab his length with your hand, making him jump and whine. ‘What a beautiful sound’, you think.

Your hand starts moving up and down and you watch as Jisung throws his head back, mouth open, low moans coming out and eyes closed as he approaches his orgasm. He looks so pretty like that, so you get closer, leaning over and kissing him. Jisung groans, thrusting his hips against your fist, making even more lewd noises while you just watch him, face so close you can feel his breath hitting on your skin.

When his movements start faltering, he can feel his release and in a moment later his hot cum is spreading all over your hand.

“Fuck”, he says, ears turning red instantly when he comes down of his high. “I usually take longer”, he explains nervously, making you chuckle.

“I didn't say anything”, you shrug, finding his anxious eyes too cute.

“I'm serious”, he pouts, zipping his pants back on.

“Me too”, you chuckle, “you took way longer than most guys do, there was a hot girl humping on you and you didn't cum, that's a feat in itself”, you tell him and he bites back a smile, you're such an idiot. But cute, definitely cute.

Jisung watches as you get up, looking for the bathroom so you can clean yourself and he finds himself smiling alone, thinking of you. What are you doing to him? And why does he not mind it at all?

It doesn't take long for Seunghoon to find out who's the guy you're going out with and he doesn't waste any time to come and find you, being the asshole he is.

You're having lunch with Mina and Miyeon when you feel that familiar arm on top of your shoulders, his scent is the same, so there's no mistaking it.

“You didn't tell me the guy you're seeing is Han Jisung”, Seunghoon’s snarky voice feels like a knife being thrown at you. You grab his arm, tossing away from you, his touch makes you sick.

“Didn't think I owed you a full report of who I'm dating now”, you say back, rolling your eyes.

“Well, I mean”, he sneers, “I thought your standards were higher”

You feel your face turning red, not from embarrassment, no, it's anger, the only reaction this man can get out of you now.

“Of course my standards are higher”, you take a deep breath, knowing very well that if you punch him in the face right now, he's going to win. “That's why I went for someone much better than you”, you roll your eyes.

“Please, in what world that guy is better than me?” He laughs and you can't help but chuckle.

“I sure could tell you all the things he's better than you, but I don't think people really need to know about how disappointing you are in bed and outside of it too”, you finish, standing up. “Ah”, you turn to him before you can walk away, “don't come looking for me again, Jisung can get very jealous”

Walking home you're foaming at the mouth, who does he think he is to talk about Jisung in that way? Oh, you really wish you could have beat the hell out of him, fucking bastard. Well, fuck him, you're better off without that prick and you hope you don't have to think about him ever again.

As soon as you get home, you hear voices inside your house coming to the conclusion that your parents are home, as if things couldn't get worse.

You take a deep breath before turning the knob to open the door, meeting uninterested looks when you walk by the kitchen.

“Why did you arrive so late?” Your mom asks, not really looking at you now, much more interested in her phone.

“I had practice”, you say, opening the fridge to grab an apple. You're hungry but if you have to eat with them you're sure you're gonna have indigestion.

“Shouldn't you be studying?” Your father accuses you. “Your brother is the best student in every one of his classes”

“Well if I had that many expensive tutors I would be the best too”, you mumble, receiving a raised brow from the older man. “I don't have any exams for the time being”, you sigh, excusing yourself but before you can cross the door out of the kitchen you hear your mom's voice.

“We are going to travel again tomorrow, we just came home to get some things”, you nod, that's nothing new.

Jisung is walking back and forth in the living room of his apartment, waiting anxiously for Chan and Changbin to be back from their morning workout session.

You didn't see it, but Jisung was there at the dining hall. He froze dead in his tracks the moment he saw Seunghoon sitting with you, all the worst case scenarios coming to his mind. Did you go back to him? You wouldn't, right?

It's true that you and Jisung don't have anything official yet, but it looked like you liked him, so even though his brain was having a field day telling him you never once enjoyed being with him, it's hard for him to actually believe you would put him aside just like that.

He can hear everything, Seunghoon isn't trying to be quiet and he's saying the exact things you were afraid Jisung would hear. He doesn't care about people talking shit about him, the only thing he cares about is what you think about him and the way you just straight away told off your ex’s makes Jisung proud of you, proud of being with you.

However, even though you don't mind all the talks and mean comments, he does. He doesn't want to harm your reputation or more importantly he doesn't want to hurt you. So Jisung made the decision to become someone better, he wants to be better for you. So when his friends open the front door, carrying their gym bags, they bump into a restless Jisung.

“Can you help me?” He asks, making Changbin and Chan look at each other and nod, sitting down with their youngest to talk.

It's been years since the three met each other and every once in a while they tried to convince Jisung to accept their advice so he could be more popular.

It was exhausting, really, Jisung only cared about music and finishing college. His routine was basically going from the studio to university to home. Work, study and sleep, those are the things he usually cares about. So it was nice seeing him going out, meeting you. He's been happier recently and it's nice for them to see him trying to improve himself for you even though they both doubted your intentions at first.

“What do you have in mind?” Chan asks.

“She- hm… she said my hair is too long?” He says, a bit embarrassed.

“We've been telling you this for months”, Changbin whines.

“Well, I think I should get a haircut and buy some new clothes”, Jisung huffs.

“Shouldn't you ask y/n to help you out with that? I'm sure she would love that”, Chan grins.

“I want to surprise her”, the younger one smiles sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.

“Okay, then”, Chan nods, “give us time to take a shower-”

“And eat”, Changbin adds.

“And eat, then we can go”, Chan laughs, standing up and walking to his room.

Jisung didn't talk much with you for two straight days, he only answered the texts you sent him and every time you asked if he wanted to meet, he said he had other plans. You started to worry that maybe word got out about your little scene with Seunghoon that day, maybe Jisung got the wrong idea about you socializing with your ex.

You didn't think you would miss him so much, but you kept checking your phone to see if he had texted you and waited until late at night for a call but it never came.

Maybe Jisung could see right through you, under this facade you put on. Maybe he doesn't want someone as lonely as you, someone who needs his warmth to keep going.

You try distracting yourself with anything, staying after practice to train a new routine. After killing some time, you store the things you used for practice and go out.

When you're closing the gymnasium, you feel a familiar presence close to you, making you turn around with a businesslike smile on your face.

“How can I help… you?” You choke on the air you just breathe. “Jisung?” You ask, speechless.

“The one and only”, he chuckles seeing your shocked face.

“What happened?” You even struggle to speak.

He's the same, but different? His hair is shorter, fixed in a nice hairstyle and his clothes are fitting him perfectly, like they were custom made.

“Do you not like it?” He asks, worried, hands patting his body trying to understand where it went wrong.

“No, no!” You blurt out, fast. “I like it, you look really good”, you don't actually have words to describe how delicious he looks, he already had you hot and bothered before, what are you going to do now? It's impossible to not want to jump his bones right this instant.

“Then?” He waits for you to continue, taking a step towards you, making you instantly take a step back. You're not sure if you'll be able to hold yourself back if he gets too close and you don't want the first time you fuck to be in the school's locker room.

“Why did you change?” You ask, trying to think more clearly.

“I'm trying to become boyfriend material for you”, he grabs your hand, holding it with his. “I even made social media accounts”, he smiles.

“But you were already perfect”, you whisper it slowly, brows knit together. Did you make him feel like he wasn't?

He sighs.

“I heard what your ex said that day”, he says, biting his bottom lip. “I don't want you going out of your way to shield me from mean comments, I want people to envy you for dating me, the same as there are dozens of guys that hate me because I got you”, he tilts his head, waiting for you to process what he just said.

“As long as you're not uncomfortable”, you say, trying to find any sign of hesitancy on his face.

“Not at all”, he tells you, “Chan and Binnie helped me buy nice clothes that are comfortable. Also, if I become more popular, It'll help 3racha”, he shrugs.

“Okay”, you nod nervously, not really knowing what to do next.

“Are you sure I look good?” He asks, playfully, seeing the way you're avoiding his eyes. Jisung takes a step closer, making you take a step back once more just for you to bump into the closed doors of the gymnasium. “Oh? Why do I get the feeling that you are thinking about running away?”

“Pff, me?” You scoff, “of course not”, you shake your head frantically.

He tsks, reaching for your waist and wrapping his arm around you.

“You know, a strong denial is like an affirmation in some cases.” Jisung says, bending down to your height, brushing his lips on yours but before you can lose yourself on his hold, you lift your hands pressing them against his chest and pushing him away.

“Can- can you not?” You huff, you can't believe you're even stuttering, you almost gave in. Almost.

You ended up giving in and it didn't take him much to convince you. Jisung was driving and you were anxiously waiting to arrive home, a cold shower and maybe a sex toy would do the trick. Everything was alright until he put his hand on your knee, sliding it up and down on your thigh. Did he get a new personality together with the makeover? He knows exactly what he's doing because he has that damn smirk plastered on his lips.

You didn't change from your cheer uniform since you had no energy and just wanted to get home to anxiously wait for Jisung's contact and now you regret it. It feels a thousand times more painful to have his hands touching the bare skin of your thighs. Each time that his hand comes up it gets closer to your core like he's testing the waters to see where you're willing to let him go.

What he still doesn't seem to know is that you're more than willing to let him go all the way and as soon as his hand gets too close to your throbbing core, you hold your breath as if that could do anything to help.

Jisung plays with the hem of your safety shorts without a care in the world, like he doesn't have you all turned on and your panties are not soaked.

“Stop the car”, you say through gritted teeth.

He glances at you before parking, making you want to rip that shit eating grin off of his face with a punch.

“What's wrong?” He asks cynically, unfastening his seatbelt to turn to you, his hand still caressing your thigh.

“You don't want to go there, Han Jisung”, you tell him, grabbing his arm to try and force his hand to stop touching you.

“Don't I?” He smiles, biting his bottom lip. You look so sexy saying his full name like that and he gets the urge to make you moan it. “I think I do”

“I hate you”, you groan, reaching to grab his collar and pulling him to you, making your mouths crash in a hungry kiss. You missed having him so close to you, his free hand cups your face and Jisung deepens the kiss, feeling your tongue caressing his so eagerly.

His other hand is working its way into your shorts, he's desperate to feel you on his fingers and as soon as he manages to get his hands under your panties, he can already feel your wetness leaking out of your sweet pussy.

“Shit”, he groans, disconnecting his lips from yours. “Are you usually this wet? Or is it just for me?” He asks shamelessly, making your whole face turn red.

You keep silent, trying to breathe normally again. It's embarrassing, how can someone provoke this kind of reaction out of you like this?

He chuckles, a dark deep chuckle while he slides his hand to your head to pull your hair.

“Cat got your tongue, pretty?” He asks, kissing you on the cheek at the same time as he places two fingers inside you, making you whimper. He pouts, tilting his head. “I'm sorry, you are so wet I thought you could handle two”

“Oh”, you feel your breathing out of pace and Jisung starts moving his fingers in and out of you. “J-jisung”, you moan, feeling his thumb circling around your clit. His fingers work fast, in and out of your hole, feeling you clenching around them. You're so tight, he can't wait to feel you around his cock.

His hair is all disheveled, pretty pink lips half open watching you becoming undone right in front of him. You want to stop him, you don't want to give him the satisfaction of ruining you so easily, but he's so handsome, his eyes are looking at you so deeply just waiting for you to come on his fingers.

The moment your whole body trembles, you close your eyes to the pleasure spreading all over you. You glare at him, panting and dizzy, seeing him take his fingers out of you and taking them straight to his mouth, licking them like a starved man.

“You taste as sweet as you look”, he tells you, fastening his seatbelt and starting the car again, driving back to the road like nothing happened.

“What about you?” You ask, seeing his obvious hard on.

“I think we had enough fun for today”, he glances at you, winking. It makes you sink in your seat, feeling your face turning red and the butterflies in your stomach. Jisung hopes you didn't realize that he would cum with a simple touch of yours, if he had your delicate hand around him one more time he wouldn't be able to last long, even less if he could feel your sweet lips on his cock, so he chose to avoid that embarrassment.

You feel excited from the moment you wake up and as a person who doesn't like waking up early that's a very difficult thing to achieve. But when you opened your eyes, groaning and exhausted, you picked up your phone to turn off the alarm just to find a few texts from Jisung saying he would be coming to pick you up.

That definitely left you excited, so you jumped out of the bed, grabbing a towel and running to the bathroom to take a quick shower. After finishing your bath, you get your hair done and choose the cutest clothes you have in your wardrobe.

The moment you go out, you see Jisung waiting for you outside of your house. He's looking good, leaning on his car with his hands in his pockets while he waits for you to walk to him.

“It should be illegal for someone to look this nice at this hour”, you try teasing him, to see if you can make him flustered.

“I was going to say the same”, he answers, checking you out, shamelessly and you are the one with a red face in the end, so you just give him a peck on the lips, trying to hide your embarrassment while getting into the car.

The ride to school is calm, you're nervously anticipating how people are going to act when they see you two, when they see Jisung.

Everyone stops to stare at you, at the same time as you want to hide from the prying eyes, you understand. Honestly, if you saw Han Jisung walking around looking like that you would stop to stare at him too.

He holds your hand, interlacing your fingers and leading you inside, a huge grin on his face, proud that he got the reaction he wanted. This was his plan, he wants you to show him off, he wants you to feel proud to be by his side and more than anything, he wants everyone to know you're his now.

He leaves you in your classroom, giving you a goodbye kiss and promising to find you later so you can have lunch together.

“Who was that?” Mina asks, mouth agape.

“That's Jisung”, you tell her proudly.

“Well, how did you work your magic so fast?” Miyeon asks.

“Will you believe it if I tell you I didn't do a thing?”

“I guess just dating you is enough to change a person”, Mina jokes, making you roll your eyes.

“Should I take that as a compliment?” You ask playfully and she chuckles.

“I guess you'll win the bet more easily than I thought”, she says, sighing, pretending to be disappointed.

“Actually, about that I-”, you fidget with your hands, it's not easy for you to give up and after what you just went through with Seunghoon you surely don't want to admit that what you have with Jisung is more than you could anticipate, it's something special. “I want to call it off, the bet”, you finally say, making your friends exchange glances, confused. “I don't want to play games with him”, you finish, sitting by Miyeon's side.

“Well, I didn't think you would give up so easily”, Mina laughs, “you're such a softie, y/n”

You smile, remembering about Jisung's hands on you earlier this morning, trying not to blush too much.

“I'll win the captain title again fair and square”, you tell Mina, stretching a hand to her so she can shake it. “And about Seunghoon, I don't really care about him anymore”, you shrug.

Mina shakes your hand back proudly, she can see something different in you now and she's happy that maybe you're seeing in yourself all the potential she's been trying to convince you that you have for all these years.

You feel a little bit jealous. Now Jisung can barely walk more than three meters without someone greeting or hitting on him, you're pouting during lunch, playing with your food while he goes on and on about 3racha’s new track.

“Are you listening?” He asks, tilting his head while looking at you.

“I am”, you nod, even though you could barely understand what he was saying.

“You're acting weird again”, he sighs, lifting his hand to your chin and pulling your face so you can look at him. “Talk to me”

“It's nothing”, you are the one sighing now, “I'm just being stupid”

“Tell me then, I'll be the judge of that”, he pushes.

“It's just-” you can't help but sulk while talking, “Those girls were clearly hitting on you earlier and you didn't do anything about it”, you whine, “I'm being stupid because I'm not even sure what I wanted you to do in that situation, even so, I'm still feeling bad and angry”

Jisung can't hold back the big smile that grows on his lips, he leans closer to your face, supporting his elbow on the table.

“Is my baby jealous?”, he asks playfully, with a cute voice, making you pout even harder, crossing your arms.

“Stop that, I'm not”, you say, feeling your cheeks burning because of the pet name.

“If you're not jealous, then can I go and get their numbers?” He tests, making you glare at him. Jisung laughs, embracing you in a hug and kissing the top of your head. “In all seriousness, I didn't even notice they were hitting on me. I was so focused on just answering their questions so I could get the hell out of their sight, I'm sorry I made you feel bad”, he clarifies.

You sigh, wrapping your arms around him and relaxing in his embrace.

“Don't apologize, I was being ridiculous”

Jisung breaths out, pulling away from your embrace and cupping your face with his hands. He stares at you for a few seconds, trying to use the right words to speak to you.

“You should definitely stop invalidating what you feel. What you feel is not ridiculous or stupid”, he gives a peck on your lips, brushing his nose on yours. “You can always tell me about your feelings, I'll always listen to you. So don't say things like that, alright?”

You want to cry, you want to smile, you want to hug him and never let go. So you snuggle in his embrace, nodding and mumbling about how he shouldn't get too close to other girls, making him smile while he kisses the top of your head. What did you do to deserve someone like him?

After finishing your lunch you two get up, carrying your trays back to their place and talking about what ice cream you should buy since you have a free afternoon. However, when you cross the doors to the dining hall, you bump directly into Seunghoon, causing a minute of awkward silence between you three. No apologies, just your ex staring at Jisung like he's trying to win a staring contest or something like that.

“Long time no see, y/n”, Seunghoon smiles to you, as if you didn't basically tell him to fuck off a few weeks ago. “I see you're accompanied, I'm Seunghoon, a friend of y/n”, he stretches his hand to shake Jisung's.

“I know who you are”, Jisung says, shaking the other man's hand. The hostility in the atmosphere is palpable but before you can excuse yourself, Seunghoon's voice is heard once more.

“Y/N promised that she would go on a double date with me and my girlfriend”, he recalls, “now that we are acquainted I feel like we can set a date”, he smiles and if you didn't know him you'd think he's genuinely interested in having a double date with friends.

“Sure, just let me know the day and time and we'll be there”, Jisung answers before you have the chance to deny.

You watch as Seunghoon chuckles, nodding and giving his goodbye. Your stomach sinking in, you have a bad feeling about this.

“What was that about?” You ask Jisung, brows knit together in confusion.

“What was what?”

“Don't play with me, Han Jisung”, you roll your eyes, crossing your arms in front of your chest and he sighs, biting on his bottom lip.

Jisung may or may not have regretted it the moment he accepted without checking with you first, but your ex just makes him so mad. The fact that he's not at least a bit apologetic about what he did to you just doesn't sit right with Jisung, how could he break your heart and nonchalantly show up in front of you asking for a double date with the girl he cheated on you with. Fuck him.

“I'm sorry”, Jisung sighs, sulking. “I should have checked with you but I just felt so angry”

You stare at him for a moment, sighing. That sucks, it seems you can't stay mad at him for too long.

“It's fine, I'm sure he would bother us until we accepted it”, you say, grabbing his arm to force him to carry on your walk. “Shall we go shopping for some couple outfits today?” You smile at him, that's going to be his punishment.

Or at least it should have been, so why does Jisung look so excited with every piece of clothing you try on? He looks very happy to buy things for him but not nearly as much as when he's watching you.

You ended up buying a couple's pajamas and for the date — that Seunghoon didn't lose any time scheduling for Friday — you got a bracelet with a pendant that resembles a ferris wheel, the place you two kissed for the first time.

“Shall we go to the amusement park again?” He asks, raising your hand high enough for him to look at the bracelet.

He sees your eyes shine to that simple mention and he smiles when you nod frantically.

“There were so many rides we didn't get to go because it was too crowded”, you say excitedly, “We have to go on the roller coaster”

“We do?” He chuckles nervously, “that thing is kinda scary”

“Of course we do!” You stop in your tracks, making him look at you. “I'll hold your hand the whole time, so you have nothing to worry about.”

You say, confidently and oddly enough, Jisung feels really reassured with your words.

“Oh, you're my knight in shining armor”, he sighs dramatically. “What would I do without you? Hm?”

He uses the hand he's holding to pull you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist and pressing your bodies against each other. Jisung gives you a peck on the lips, smiling when he sees you blushing.

“You better always keep me close to you”, you tell him, avoiding his eyes. “So I can protect you”

“Mmn”, he agrees, snuggling his face in the crock of your neck, “I'll keep you always in arm's length”

The dreadful Friday arrives too fast, when neither you or Jisung wanted it to come. You try not to think too much about the way you're dressed, you don't want your ex to think you dressed up for him. Jisung on the other hand, wants to look his best so Seunghoon can swallow back all the things he said about you, knowing that you did in fact find someone better.

“Ready?” He asks you when you get into the car.

“Can't we just stand them up?” You ask, hopeful, while fastening your seatbelt.

“Let's just stay for thirty minutes, then I can pretend I received a call and we have to go”, he grabs your hand and kisses it, “how does that sound?”

“Sounds good”, you nod, smiling at him. But that damn feeling that something just isn't right keeps bothering you.

Jisung drives slowly, trying to avoid the unavoidable. It should be fine, nothing is gonna go wrong, it's just anxiety trying to make him paranoid.

Seunghoon chose a fancy restaurant, Jisung is only used to going to places like that when he meets someone from the label, together with Chan and Changbin. He doesn't really like fancy places, he wanted to take you there on a date because he thought that was something you would like but in the end you're not into that either.

“I should probably tell you right now that this restaurant is where Seunghoon asked me to be his girlfriend”, you tell Jisung as soon as he parks in front of the place your double date is supposed to happen.

“What?” Jisung asks, confused.

“I didn't want to believe before we actually arrived but I knew I recognized that address when you showed it to me”, you explain. “I think he just wants to brag, he'll try to get under your skin for sure. Maybe he'll try to talk about the time we dated, that would be a dick move since his girlfriend is gonna be there but he is a dick so I don't expect less from him”, you start to ramble nervously.

“It's okay, you're with me now”, he reassures you one more time, grabbing your hand and squeezing it, “we are gonna go there, hear whatever he has to say and in thirty minutes we are out and we can even go to a real date just the two of us”, Jisung tilts his head waiting for your confirmation and you nod, leaning closer and kissing him.

“That sounds great, you are great”, you tell him

Awkward, stifling, suffocating. Those are the words that better describe how the dinner began on that night. Seunghoon was late but his girlfriend was already there so you had to awkwardly sit there with the girl your ex boyfriend cheated on you with. You are a good person and you don't want to cause a scene, especially because you don't really care about your ex anymore so you feel a bit grateful to this girl who took that bomb away from you.

“I liked your stunt on the last game”, she says, sheepishly while picking on her nails.

“Ah, yes. We worked for three months to come up with that one”, you answer, sipping on your cup of water and cursing Seunghoon in your mind. Where the hell is he?

Except that when Seunghoon waltzed inside the restaurant, you knew exactly why he was late. The look of utter disappointment on his face told you everything you needed to know, he wanted you two to fight over him. You wanna laugh. Did he really expect to come in late just to find his ex and current girlfriend grabbing each other by the hair or yelling at each other? What a fucking loser.

He probably didn't expect to see Jisung's arms wrapped around your waist, leaning so close to you or the whispers and giggles that were never common in your relationship with him.

“Where have you been?” His girlfriend asks while he sits down but he doesn't even look at her, eyes fixed on you and Jisung.

“Something happened”, he brushes off, vaguely. “Let's order?”

You and Jisung exchange confused looks, nodding to him.

“Oh, this is the place where we started dating, right?” Seunghoon asks, after the waiter takes your order, pretending like he didn't know about it when he set the date there.

“Yeah”, you sigh, eyeing Jisung, already knowing where your ex was trying to go with that.

“You loved the pasta here, why didn't you order that?” He asks and you glance at his girlfriend who's glaring at him.

“I didn't like the pasta, you did”, you sigh, feeling Jisung's pulling you a little closer to him, making you look at him to see the man smiling at you. You release the air you didn't even notice you were holding and you realize how stiff your whole body is, why does Seunghoon make you so nervous? It didn't feel this way the other day when you met him by yourself. It's just that you have the feeling that he has an ulterior motive to this dinner, other than just bragging about his new relationship.

He looks mad at your answer, even more mad because of how close Jisung is to you. You used to be like that with him, grasping at the slightest bit of affection he would give you. He thought you would come back to him eventually, Seunghoon thought you would forgive him, would depend on him once more so why didn't you? Why don't you need him anymore?

“I heard something funny”, he grabs everyone's attention suddenly. “Heard that you're only dating him because of a bet?” He sneers.

Your heart stops at that moment.

“What?” You ask, immediately turning to Jisung who looks frozen, staring at Seunghoon.

“Yeah, one of my friends heard the funniest conversation in one of his classes”, he laughs, “I’m sure you already know about it, right?” He asks Jisung, raising a brow in amusement.

Jisung starts to shake, he can't look at you, not right now. But he also can't let Seunghoon win, it would be too humiliating for the both of you.

“Yeah, I knew about it”, he lies, feeling the least bit satisfied with the annoyed groan Seunghoon lets out. “I think you should start treating your girl better rather than taking care of y/n’s relationship”, he finishes, standing up. “I lost my appetite, let's go”, Jisung tells you, stretching his hand so you can hold it but his eyes don't look into yours.

Jisung doesn't say a word to you until he parks in front of your house and you were too scared to start the conversation but when he kept quiet even after ten minutes, only staring at the wheel in his hands, you couldn't take it anymore.

“I know I should have told you before, I-”

“So he was telling the truth?” He looks at you for the first time in the last hour and you wish he didn't, the hurt in his eyes makes your chest feel like someone is squeezing your heart. “You are low”, he spits.

You feel tears brimming in your eyes, you know you deserve that but at the same time you could never have imagined him treating you this way.

“I'm sorry, I'm so sorry”, the tears start running down your face, “it started as a bet but I called it off, I swear” you try grabbing his hand so he can look at you but he snatches himself out of your grasp, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking outside. He's afraid he'll cry if he looks at you, he's scared he'll give in if he so much as glances at you.

“I need to think”, it's the only thing he says.

“Jisung, please, hear me out”, you plead once more but he doesn't look at you.

“I don't want to hear anything right now”, he tells you, stretching his body over yours to open your door, waiting for you to get out.

You step out of the car, glancing at him over and over, expecting him to change his mind but he doesn't and you watch as the car disappears far away on the road.

You only let yourself cry after closing the door to your room, even though there's no one else home, you still feel like you need to lock yourself up so you can feel anything.

You're such an idiot, you should have told him about the bet but it was something so meaningless that it didn't even cross your mind that you should come clean to him, in your head everything that mattered was that you liked him and that you called the bet off but you didn't take into consideration that he would feel hurt about that and that's what hurts the most.

You always talk about how Seunghoon did bad things to you, that he didn't have any regard towards you, but did you have any towards Jisung? You waltzed into his life, put him in the spotlight and made him open himself to you, but you couldn't take the time to think about how hurt he would feel if he found out about the circumstances that made you like him in the first place.

You feel guilty about everything, you wish you could turn back time and change everything but you can't, you can't go back and you can't make it up to him, you have to wait for him to forgive you or in the worst case scenario, for him to dump you and that hurts too much.

Jisung knew someone like you wouldn't like someone like him just because you thought he was cute, he knew that there was something behind your sweet words and harsh moves on him but he chose to ignore every signal, every flag and every warning his mind pointed out because he wanted to believe you. Jisung wanted to let himself like you, he wanted to be the one to protect you, the one whom you would call on every minor inconvenience you run into but in the end, he should have been the one being protected from you.

He can't believe he let himself fall for you, why would you even like him? At least he thought you did, he thought you felt happy when you were with him. Lies, everything was a huge lie and he wants to punch himself for letting you make a fool out of him like that.

A week goes by without news of Jisung, you see him walking through the school's corridors but you're too scared to approach him so you just watch as he keeps his routine everyday, like nothing happened, like you were never in his life.

Mina and Miyeon are making shifts to stay with you, if they don't you won't eat properly and you only sleep when the exhaustion is so much your body can't handle it anymore. You're scared he'll end things, but you're ready to beg if he tries too, you know Jisung is worth begging for.

On one of the rare moments you find yourself alone, you try to stay away from everyone else who are not your close friends. You're hiding in the building where Jisung has his classes, in hopes that you can see at least a glimpse of his face.

“Where have you been?” You hear an annoying voice right behind you, making you sigh while you turn around to see Seunghoon with his arms crossed in front of his chest. “You disappeared after our double date, did your new boyfriend really know about your bet?” He chuckles, making you want to punch him in the face. This is all his fault, if he didn't open his filthy mouth to say those things to Jisung you could have come clean to him and maybe this whole incident could have been avoided.

“Fuck you, Seunghoon”, you lose you composure, not really caring about winning this one, you just want to curse at him. “You cheated on me and then you tried to ruin my relationship and for what? Leave me the hell alone”, you spit out, walking past him but before you can go further you feel his grasp on your wrist, forcing you to turn around.

“You used to adore me, y/n, you were supposed to forget about everything and just stay with me so why did you rebel?”

“Oh, for fucks sake, I never ‘adored’ you, I just treated you like a good girlfriend should treat her boyfriend even though you have never done the same to me”, you try shaking your arm away from him but he doesn't let go. “I'm sick and tired of you, let go of me right now”, you pull your arm again with all your strength but he's grabbing you so strongly it's starting to hurt.

“Let's start over, yeah? I'll be good to you this time”, he asks, like he didn't hear anything you said.

“I have someone I really like now, nothing you do is gonna change that’, you groan, feeling your wrist sore. “I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore, just forget about me”

“Why do you always make everything so difficult-”, he tries to drag you away from the prying eyes who are starting to watch the scene unfolding, but you feel hands on your shoulders steadying you in place. Jisung walks in front of you, pushing Seunghoon and forcing him to let go of you.

“This doesn't concern you”, your ex says through gritted teeth.

“If it concerns y/n, it concerns me”, Jisung answers.

“Just because you got a little popular you think you can come up against me?” Seunghoon scoffs, coming closer to Jisung, challenging him.

“You're an idiot if you think you can just grab someone's girlfriend like that and don't get in trouble”, Jisung says, “if you have anything to discuss with her you can talk to me first”

“Don't be ridiculous, we can talk like grown ups. Right, y/n?” Seunghoon tries to come to you, but Jisung grabs him by the collar.

“Don't even fucking try”, Jisung glares at him, “if you get close to her one more time you're not gonna be able to play your next game”, he finishes, letting go of Seunghoon and pushing him away from you.

Seunghoon huffs and puffs but he knows he can't get into trouble if he wants to stay on the football team, so he curses you for the last time before turning around and walking away.

“Are you okay?” Jisung asks, looking around.

“Yeah, I'm fine”, you say, stepping closer to him but that's when you notice he's not looking at you and he's not even trying to hide that. “Thank you for helping me”, stepping back and stroking your wrist which hurts like hell. You want to cry but it's not from the pain coming from there, it's from the immeasurable ache coming from your chest.

“It's nothing”, he sighs, “try not to stay alone for now, you should stop coming here too”, he says, nodding to you before he's gone, walking away from you. Leaving you there, feeling empty.

“Should I be worried?” Chan asks Changbin, as soon as he sees the number of empty cans thrown in the center table in the living room. Jisung is seated on the floor looking at the TV but clearly not watching, he's just staring at it with an empty gaze.

“He's been like that since yesterday”, Changbin sighs, leaning over the kitchen counter while watching his younger friend open another can of beer. “You would have know if you had come back home”

“So, on the only night I sleep in my girlfriend's house, Han turns into an alcoholic?” Chan asks, ironically.

“He's been weird for a few days, I think he fought with y/n”, Changbin says, “I knew there was something going on.”

“Did you talk to him?”

“I tried, but he won't answer my questions or just sighs randomly while I'm talking”

“I'll try talking to him”, Chan says, looking at his friend who just shrugs, going back to wash the dishes.

The older one gets closer slowly, sitting on the couch and looking at Jisung for a moment, trying to see if he'll acknowledge his presence but it doesn't happen, the younger one doesn't even move.

“Hey, are you alright?” Chan asks, but there's no answer to his question. “Look, you know you can talk to us about anything, right?” He tries again, but still receives no answer, so he snatches Jisung's beer out of his hand, receiving a frustrated grunt from his friend.

“Give it back”, Jisung finally lets out.

“Talk to me”, Chan pleads.

“There's nothing to talk about”, Jisung shrugs. He should end things with you, even if it hurts, that's what he should do, right?

“Clearly there's something going on”, Chan says, “I won't leave you alone until you talk and you know I can be really annoying when I want to”

Jisung sighs, he knows that very well.

“She only asked me out because of a bet”, Jisung says, “y/n, I mean”

Chan sucks through his teeth, that's not a nice thing to do. But he can't really judge her when he did something similar when he started seeing his girlfriend, so he'll have to play devil's advocate this time.

“She ended things with you then? Because the bet is over or something like that?” He tries to push to know a bit more.

“No, her ex told me”, Jisung says, continuing when Chan frowns in confusion, “he was trying to get under my skin so we would fight”

“What about y/n?”

“She said she called it off and that she likes me”, he chuckles, “I don't believe her”

“Why not?” Chan asks, still confused. “Look, Han, what she did is shitty, okay? That's not open for discussion, but why are you doubting that she likes you? Shouldn't she use this opportunity to get out of this relationship now that you found out about the bet? Why would she lie about it? It doesn't make sense”, Chan points out.

“Why would someone like her like someone like me? I'm no one”, Jisung cries out, he knows Chan is right but he just can't let himself fall for your trap again, he can't handle it if you break his heart a second time.

“Now you're only letting your self doubt talk, what do you mean you're no one?” Chan sighs, “you're a great friend, you're smart and you're part of 3racha, you're talented as hell, Binnie and I would be nothing without you”, Chan says.

“Yeah, but she's so wonderful”, Jisung sighs, “she's kind and smart, she's funny and cute, she's the prettiest girl I have ever got to know”

“Did she ever tell you that you weren't those things too?”

“No”, the younger one looks at Chan with puppy eyes. “But still, why would she make a bet to date me if I wasn't a loser?”

“You should ask her that yourself”, Chan shrugs. “You know I did some questionable things to date my girl and I'm not proud of that, but I love her with all my heart. In the end, maybe what's important is what's on her heart right now and not when it started”

When you receive Jisung's text telling you he wants to meet up, you feel relieved. He's finally gonna talk to you but at the same time you feel anxious, he's very vague about what you're going to talk about so you can't ignore the possibility of him ending things.

You set the date in your house, you don't want to go to a public place just to end up a crying mess in front of everyone there. So you wait patiently until Jisung arrives, you bite all your nails, clean everything that can be cleaned even though it's already impeccable, you do anything that can ease your anxiety and make you less nervous.

Three knocks on the door make you jump from the couch, running to the entrance and opening the door in a fast swing.

You missed Jisung's face, his round cheeks look smaller than the last time you saw him and the eyebags under his eyes are huge. You are no different from that, you know you lost weight since your cheer uniform is big on you and you're breaking out in pimples because of the stress.

“Hi”, you say, awkwardly, giving space for him to enter.

“Hey”, he answers, waiting for you to guide him to wherever you want to talk.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Should you have offered? It's something you always do when you have guests.

“I'm good”, he answers again. “Can we cut to the chase?” He turns to you, arms crossed in front of his chest. That doesn't sound good, he doesn't look like he forgave you.

“Yeah”, you nod, bracing yourself for what's to come.

“Was everything a lie?” Jisung asks, biting his bottom lip. “Was anything you ever said real?”

“Yes it was, almost everything”, you take a step closer to him but he takes a step back, not ready to be so close to you yet. “Everything started as a bet, I wanted to make someone better than Seunghoon so I could make him jealous”, you sigh, feeling like an idiot.

“It was your idea?” He asks, staring at you.

“No, it was not my idea but I accepted it anyway”, you shake your head. “I know it's stupid, I know it is. But I fell in love with you and when I realized I didn't want to hurt you I called the bet off”, you explain.

“And when was that?”

“Three weeks ago”

He sighs, walking around for a minute, trying to think.

“How am I supposed to trust you now?” He pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to rationalize, trying to find an excuse for you, so he can forgive you.

“You are-”, a sob leaves your lips as soon as you start talking, tears running down your cheeks, you didn't even notice you were crying. “You're the first person who ever showed me what love really is”, you try to explain.

“So, do you like me or do you like the way I make you feel?” He whispers, eyes pleading for your answer to not destroy the little bit of hope he still has on you.

“I like y- I love you”, you try holding his hands once more. “I never thought I could love someone the way I love you, Jisung. I love everything about you, I sleep thinking about you and I wake up thinking about you. When I'm eating something nice I always ask myself if you already ate or if you would like what I'm having. When I'm out having fun I always wish you were there with me. Whenever we go to different classes I miss you immediately and I count every second so I can see you again”, you squeeze his hand. “I’m not asking for you to forgive me right now but please don't leave me, please stay with me”, you plead, feeling the tears running down your face.

Jisung's heart breaks from listening to your cries and sobs, he wants to save his pride and leave you for good. But he can't, Jisung is so in love with you right now that even the thought of staying away from you hurts much more than how he hurt because of what you did.

So he kisses you, his hands cup your face as usual, like nothing ever happened, like you never stayed apart. You missed his warmth, his lips, his hands on your body, everything.

“I missed you”, you tell him, wrapping your arms around his waist, ready to never let go again.

“I missed you too”, he sighs, “and I love you too”

“I'm so sorry, I swear I'll never do anything to hurt you ever again”, you grasp his shirt, bringing him even closer to you.

He knows he shouldn't feel reassured by your promise, how could he? But he does, he's just stupid but that's the effect you have on him.

You sit together and you tell him everything. Why you started a bet and why you chose him, when you started to like him and why you didn't tell him about the whole situation before.

You also talk about how terrible it was for the both of you to stay apart for so long, how you were ready to beg him to forgive you and that made him laugh, that's something he could never imagine you doing.

In the end you're both exhausted. Days without sleeping properly finally come back to bite the both of you on the ass so you invite Jisung to stay over, needing to stay close to him more than usual. You two stare at each other for a moment while laying down together, you can't even believe he forgave you and that he's there with you.

Jisung brushes off the strands of hair falling over your eyes, caressing your cheek before leaning closer to kiss you for the last time before the both of you give in to the deep slumber that's waiting.

“I love you”, he whispers when you close your eyes, making you smile like an idiot.

“I love you too”, you say back to him, letting yourself fall into unconsciousness.

When the light coming through the windows hits your eyes, you start waking up, slowly trying to look around just to see a sleepy Jisung with his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him. He looks pretty even when he's sleeping, pouting a bit while he breathes quietly.

You can't hold yourself, so you lean closer giving a peck on his cheek.

“Hannie, wake up”, you whisper seeing his eyes flutter and his pout grows bigger.

“Just five more minutes”, he asks, pulling you even closer to him.

You sigh, deciding to let him sleep but when you try to get up the hold he has on your waist gets stronger.

“Where are you going?” He asks, opening his eyes.

“I was going to make some breakfast”, you say, watching him shaking his head and snuggling closer to you.

“No, I don't wanna. Stay here with me”, he whines.

“But what are we gonna eat?”

“We can order something”, he kisses your cheek, trailing kisses to your mouth and then to your neck, biting and sucking on the skin making you giggle and squirm in his embrace.

Jisung chuckles, kissing you. It's a slow, familiar kiss, one of his hands cupping your face and the other holds your waist pulling you closer. You put your hand on his hip, trying to find stability because you feel dizzy with his scent and his lips on you.

He parts the kiss so you both can breathe, but he keeps landing pecks on your jaw, neck and collarbone. His hands land on the rem of your shirt, he looks at you waiting for your permission and you nod, watching as he instantly pulls the piece of fabric out of you. Jisung bites his lower lip, staring down at your breasts, you look so beautiful he thinks that maybe he died and went to heaven.

The man leans closer, licking on your hard nipples, making you suck through your teeth, feeling his hot breath hit on your cold skin.

“Fuck”, you mutter when he bites lightly on the spot. Jisung chuckles, feeling your hands grabbing on his arms and your nails gripping on his skin. He keeps going down, leaving warm and wet kisses down your stomach, finding the waistband of your pajama pants and giving a kiss on both the sides of your hips before pulling the piece of clothing down.

He stares at your panties for a moment, it has bees printed on it and that makes him laugh.

“Do you like bees that much?” He asks, pulling the fabric down while he watches you squirm in embarrassment. You didn't think you'd have sex first thing in the morning so you didn't bother changing to something more sexy. You slap the palm of your hands in front of your eyes, covering your face. “You're cute”, he says, pulling your underwear down and kissing your right knee, then the left, “and so pretty.” You take one of your hands out of your eyes just to see Jisung staring right to your core. He's getting comfortable on the bed, positioning your legs over his shoulders while he grabs your hips with his hands to keep you in place.

Jisung doesn't lose time, kissing the inside of your thighs before licking your pussy, a long and wet strand that makes you immediately want to close your legs but his hands won't let you move. He slides one of his hands in between your legs, pressing a digit over your clit and then inserting the same finger inside you. Jisung sucks on your clit, circling the bud with his tongue while you stare at him, your bottom lip stuck between your teeth with so much strength it could draw blood.

“I can't get enough of your taste”, he says, using his free hand to clean around his mouth, licking his fingers soon after. “Can you handle another finger, baby?” He asks, cockily while you throw your head back, nodding frantically.

Jisung inserts a second finger, going back to suck on your sweet pussy, he feels like he could cum just by eating you out. His hip starts moving by itself while he searches for some friction, humping on the bed.

“Sungie”, you let out, hands landing on his head while you pull it closer to your cunt. “I'm close”, you squirm, feeling his tongue working faster and his fingers reaching places you never could. The knot on your stomach keeps growing until you feel like seeing stars, your legs shake uncontrollably and you moan loudly, eyes screwed shut.

Jisung groans, satisfied, it's so good to feel you cumming in his mouth, he could stay between your legs forever.

He trails kisses back to you, kissing your lips with such hunger you're not sure where it's coming from. You can feel your taste in his mouth and that only adds to the arousal you are still feeling even after an orgasm.

You look at his swollen lips and disheveled hair, thinking he's the prettiest man you have ever seen in your entire life. Your hands go to the rem of his shirt and in a swift move, you get it out of him, staring at his upper body like someone starved. You smirk, pushing him down so you can lean over him, doing the same as he did to you and trailing kisses down his jaw and neck, chest and stomach, until you see the path to your happiness. You pull his pants down, underwear going together, his hard cock springs hitting on his stomach, the head leaking with pre-cum, making you lick your lips, salivating just with the thought of all of that in your mouth.

You look at Jisung, he's waiting patiently for you to do something, anything and you like the feeling of having him in that place, wanting to be satisfied by you. You lean over, licking at his shaft from the base to the head before putting everything inside your mouth.

You can't feet all of him, so you grab the base stroking it up and down on the parts your mouth can't reach.

“Oh my god”, you hear his whimper, smiling to yourself because you're the one provoking that reaction out of him. You keep sucking on his cock, looking at him, Jisung has his head thrown back, lips slightly apart but he struggles to keep watching you, the image of you sucking on him is just too much for him, you're just too sexy, he can't handle it.

Jisung can feel his release approaching, he taps on your shoulder trying to catch your attention while you're so concentrated in sucking him off.

“I'm gonna cum”, he manages to let out but rather than stopping, you suck him even harder and stroking his cock with more resolution. In a moment you feel his hot cum spreading all over your mouth, making you smile while you swallow everything, opening your mouth and showing your tongue to him.

You come closer to him, kissing him the same as he did to you and he can feel his taste on your tongue.

“Fuck, you're so hot”, he says as soon as he splits the kiss between the two of you.

“It's all for you”, you whisper, leaning close to his ear. Jisung smiles, you're going to make him go insane.

“Do you have any condoms?” He asks, hastily, grabbing you by the hips and making you sit on his lap. You nod, leaning over the nightstand to open the drawer, showing him the package.

“But I'm on birth control”, you tell him, blushing. You never asked to be fucked raw before, you and your ex always used protection even though he protested a lot about it. “I'm clean, I got tested after I found out about the cheating”, you complete. It would be embarrassing if Jisung refused but it doesn't hurt to ask. All you want is to feel his cock inside you.

“A-are you sure?” He asks, correcting himself when you tilt your head in confusion, brows knit together. “I mean, are you sure about not using protection?” He completes and you nod.

“I trust you”, you kiss the tip of his nose, making his heart flutter. Just the thought of fucking you raw managed to make his semi erection turns into a full hard on in a second.

“Okay”, he nods, throwing the package away while he sits down. Jisung gives a few strokes on his cock before you position yourself over him, he puts the tip on your entrance holding his breath as soon as he feels your wet walls around him. “Shit, you're so tight”, his hands land on your hips, helping you go down on his length.

It hurts a little, he's bigger than average so the burning sensation is not surprising to you, even though you were well prepared it still is an intrusion.

“You're the one who's big”, you tell him, biting on his shoulder as soon as you manage to fit all of him inside of you. You stay still for a moment, catching your breath. When your hips start moving it feels so good, it's almost indescribable, the amount of places he can reach is ridiculous, you want to have his cock inside of you all day.

Your pussy is just so good, Jisung can't help gripping your hips more tightly, encouraging you to move faster. He thrusts his hips against you, spitting on his fingers and sliding his hand down to your clit, making circles there while he watches you riding him with your eyes closed shut, feeling your high closer and closer. He's no different, your flattering walls squeezing him are too much for him, he feels like he can cum anytime now.

Jisung kisses you, feeling you moan loudly against his lips, you grip his shoulder burying your nails on his skin and that only makes him crazier. He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him, going deeper inside of you. You throw your head back, not able to hold in any longer. Your moans are music to Jisung's ears, he's sure he can cum just by hearing you so it's no surprise when he reaches his orgasm, shooting his seed inside you.

“Fuck”, he groans, movements faltering. You watch as he leans on you, head resting on your chest. That's what's necessary for you to cum and you are almost not able to breathe normally after the intensity of that orgasm.

Jisung helps you lie down on the bed, getting comfortable by your side while he snuggles himself close to you.

“I love you”, that's what he says, looking at you with loving eyes and there's nothing more running through his mind other than how much he loves you.

“I love you too”, you giggle happily, giving a peck on his lips. “I'll need a whole day to recover from this, though”, you tease.

“What do you mean? You better be ready for another round”, he answers, smiling and kissing you. You better brace yourself.

[End]

———

A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback gives me motivation to keep writing.

Taglist: @rockstrhanji @angelsquid @feelikecinderella @realrintaro @bomi-ja @sasiiidumpling @itshannjisung @whyisaah @weareapackofstrays @kkamismom12 @soonie1010 @bberymi @minleemin @ayejaii

[dead-inside-demiboy]

I still enjoy Sander sides a fuck ton, but I've been out of the fandom for years now. That being said, I've been rewatching it recently and here's a really cool thing I've noticed!

So while they are characters and all of the sides feel fully fleshed out and realistic, they are also aspects personified and it was done SO WELL

Like of course Logan would get very stuck up and controlling with certain stuff, that's how logic operates. Especially with adhd, logic is usually the voice of guilt in the back of your head when you do things wrong. On the other end, logic is also silly, you sometimes remember something random for no reason. And of course Logan gets ignored a lot! How often do you listen to your logic 100%?

Of course Roman is grand and has large ambitions too big for his boots, that's what creativity feels like. Yes, Roman will be self centered, because if you're an artist (like Thomas) creativity is a big source of pride for you, especially if you post online. Roman being insecure makes sense when you think of imposter syndrome and how popular Thomas is. Obviously Roman loves Disney and cartoons, they actively spur on creative juices.

Of course Patton is pushy and controlling with his beliefs, that's what morality does! Growing up religious would only make that more extreme. Of course he's commonly listened to and taken at face value, your ethics/morals are some of the heaviest driving forces when they kick in, and it takes a lot to shift them. Obviously he's the least mature, your morals are instilled when you're young and you never really grow out of them. But he's also a dad because older male figures are stereotypically the ones that teach you morals in the first place!

Of course Virgil is so rude in the beginning but gets an acceptance arc, anxiety is a bitch to live with that fucks with everything else, but you need to learn to work with it, not against it, similar to any other emotion. He used to be part of the dark sides cause when you don't know what to do with feelings like that, you end up pushing them down or hurting yourself. He hates not being taken seriously because when you completely ignore and blow off your alarm bells it puts you in active danger!

Speaking of, Dark sides tangent! First of all, they aren't really the "bad" parts, they're just the parts of Thomas that he bottled up or tried to hide from himself. And the name "dark sides" is so good, cause it's like the dark side of the moon! Just as important as the light side, just different, harder to see if you aren't actively looking, and often ignored or viewed as "worse"

Tangent over. So!

Of course Janus's main role is to hide the other dark sides! He's representation of what happens when somebody hides parts of themselves. He has a villian and snake persona cause of religious reasons and because deceit is viewed as one of those bad things that need to be bottled up! He is at the core of a lot of self preservation and caring of others because for Thomas, that is the only time he's used Deceit so it's all that he can do.

Of course Remus is equally as prideful as Roman, he has the same issues with imposter syndrome! Of course he has a bunch of gore and sex jokes/ideas, he's the creative parts that morals state are "bad". Unlike Roman who's usually on topic, Remus goes constantly off tangent because that is what your wilder/more experimental side of creativity does! It just spits shit out and you figure out what sticks!

Its very similar to Greek mythology and idk! I just love when personification is done super well while making the characters still feel human!

[ordinarylawnmower]

Mx. Lawnmower r u OK. U reblogged that Shockwave post one billion times it is everything on my tl

Here look at these

Implications be drawn based the photographic evidence of a man who is seen in restraints curiously often. I'm sure any jokes regarding his sexual predilection that can be made has been made. Usually I take this kind of urges out on a piece of paper hastily scrawling porn but that's like trying to put out a housefire with a single drop of crisp morning dew. Orgasm is not a prerequisite to sex, although physiologically, that's where it's headed. The threshold of release is a promise, the journey's sticky end. Orgasm might not even be feasible when escorted by prowl fucking of petrex while he gloat, but if you interpret actions as symbols-whose meaning mutates through the motions of living-distal thoughts and forms can become associated, then entangled, and a cinching rope becomes a loving embrace. The mind connect allegory to sensation, and sensation crescendos to catharsis. Shockwave, who understands the world in cascading logic, must have accepted this as an inevitability. Taboo and shame then becomes arbitrary and illogical. To an empirically devoted mind, sex has no intrinsic difference from other aspects of existence. It's fool's errand trying to define his sexuality or fetishes, because either everything is sex and living is just building to the next orgasm; or sex doesn't exist, and orgasm means nothing other than a mechanical(Lol!) response to having one's tool stroked. I can entertain the notion of dichotomy for a second and imagine the shades of grey that exist in-between these two extremes, and then the pastabilities that exist outside this spectrum. How to describe this nebula in a way that's meaningful to the individual? What truth did emerge from untamed data? It's difficult to imagine Shockwave, a scientific man, tolerate living a life without knowing fully himself. In fact, its difficult for me to imagine Shockwave at all without resorting to my own utterly insufficient expressions, because he's so vast and endless. He is inexpressible

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

Meet the Parents Part 2

Okay, once again, I rambled for too long and needed to do a second part. Sorry that this post is also coming delayed, real life stuff comes first.

Part 1 to be up to speed!

You know? Maybe it was for the best that the post got cut short, I realized of a small detail that didn't notice yesterday.

The sequence where this four frames are from last around a 1 or 2, I am not really doing this in any professional fashion so I cannot say the exact time; but it is pretty quick, even at half speed.

But you can see how for a moment, Gwen either realizes this is not going well, or drops the enthusiastic persona for a second. Either way, I think it shows that this is not going how she expected.

While Gwen hasn't heard enough to know it was a bad idea using their first names, I don't doubt that Miles talks about them fondly.

She got along well with May and Ben (I notice later that there are some flashbacks including Ben.) And that probably meant a lot to her because you can see how prevalent was the relationship between those families, eating together, talking, etc. Almost like a family.

I don't think Gwen would like to replace Peter and his family, but Miles is not a replacement of Peter anyways. She probably wanted meeting them (Even if I am sure she didn't want to have this meeting today,) would run a lot more smoother.

Because she knows Miles loves his parents, and they do sound like good people; she didn't even seem to think this could actually turn so awkward.

This moment just last a couple of seconds at best, so this goes fairly quickly.

And again, I am not saying this because I want to paint Miles' parents in a bad light; even if they are not giving a fair shot to Gwen, all things consider they are been extremely patient with Miles.

(I really need to do a post about that.)

Now going back to where we left it.

Oh this scene is so hard for me to see.

(Sorry, but DAMN the representation here; this didn't exactly happen to me, but similar enough that is giving me the most embarrassing flashbacks. No I am not saying this is an universal experience, just very painfully real to me.)

Okay, Miles' parents are being over protective here? Oh for sure.

While I think their actions are very logical and understandable once you remember they have no idea what Miles is doing; this is really the part where Rio and Jeff shows us they also need to mature in this movie.

And I don't say it as an insult; a lot of parents have trouble with this transition, and Miles is their first and only child; with said child suddenly not acting as the same kid anymore.

(Sidenote; I am surprised Miles doesn't have any siblings, Jeff and Rio look so in love I am surprised it didn't happen.)

I love how Gwen just takes her hand back, like "well damn I didn't even get a date with him and his parents already are telling me to back off."

Also oof, poor Miles. Honestly forget three months this is probably worse than that already.

Rio making that joke is painfully realistic and let's move on to the other part of that dialogue.

I think Rio and Jeff aren't just trying to establish some rules with Miles (considering the amount he has broken today,) but they also need to reaffirm themselves of being able to dictate what's going on Miles's life.

Again, this is coming just after they grounded him, and then he dipped out. They are feeling they are losing him.

I love Rio, I do, but ma'am this is how you get your kid to keep even more secrets for you.

Not much else to say here, this is the lesson she and Jeff need to learn. Miles is (probably) still hating being alive right now; and Gwen is somehow able to keep that composed face despite everything which has to be one of her most impressive feats in this film.

I honestly have to feel it for Gwen right now.

She probably knows the alert her watch is giving her is bad news, so she really doesn't have another choice.

Forget not making a good impression with Jeff and Rio, now she just lost her chance to have a decent goodbye with Miles.

At this point I don't think she would had admitted to herself this couldn't happen again, I think even now she hoped for another chance later down the line. But there is no idea to know when.

I have no idea what she would had said if she had the chance to say goodbye on her own terms, to his face; but it was certainly not what she ended up doing.

Girl, 3 years being spiderwoman and you can't still come up with good lies for situations like this?

Ok I cannot blame her for not being able to come with up with something better; this entire conversation was already not going well and now she basically needs to flee, which doesn't help.

Oof, look at Miles's face, he really looks so heartbroken here.

For all the awkwardness Gwen has sported during this conversation, this is among her most natural expressions; while she is probably not stranger for dipping early, I do think this is not how she wanted to leave.

Gwen really didn't want to leave, at least not leave Miles. While she couldn't really explain what was going on, I think she wanted to let him no that this isn't about his parents or him, she wouldn't be going out if she didn't have any other choice really.

Jeff hasn't really said much during this conversation, mostly having judgy stares at most, but you can see his expression become a bit more open once he sees Gwen's behaviour change.

Rio I think is trying to maintain a mask because she probably also caught on this looking a bit off, but also because is around here that she starts to realizing how much Gwen means to Miles.

I think is also around this point that Rio seemed to want to say something else.

She could just be trying to say goodbye, but I think her expression and her hand point out more than she actually wanted to intervene here.

I am pretty sure that regardless of how Jeff and Rio felt about Gwen, they didn't want to make her run away like that.

Because again, they are missing context; Gwen is leaving because the Spot flee and she just got herself into a mess, Miles knows this is related to spidey issues.

But as far as Jeff and Rio are concerned, this girl tried to be friendly (way too friendly for their liking but friendly nonetheless,) and is now running away after Rio decided to play Mother Hen.

(Sorry, that joke may not be understandable in english. Mama Gallina/Mother Hen is an expression used a lot in my country for moms that are very protective of their kids.)

Oh, this shot.

This is an interesting comparison because when Miles heard that Gwen was leaving, he looked so crestfallen; she could see it so did his parents but he didn't register the fact that it was so pain this was for him.

Gwen maintained a somewhat composed face to them, but on this shot that she is giving everyone the back, she looks so sad.

This, is basically their relationship in a nutshell. Miles wears his heart in his sleeve and can't help himself on it, and Gwen tries her hardest to keep her emotions at bay, but everything so often they creep back.

This is awkward, and it looks awkward, and this is really more into speculation territory than analysis, but I think she did it because she wanted to go for a hug, or similar.

I had mentioned in other posts how I believe Gwen is an affectionate person, or at least, someone who likes and seeks physical affection to those important to her.

The way she went to hug her dad both at the beginning and end show how much she craves affection; and how she barely contained herself before hugging Miles tells me not just that she probably has even less people to hug nowadays, but how much important he is to her.

But she probably doesn't want to upset his parents more, and his mom told her just a minute ago to basically leave Miles alone; so this was the best she could think of.

Nobody is really happy. Even Rio and Jeff are realizing how uncomfortable is Gwen; thought again, they are probably thinking this is all their fault.

This is really the moment when Rio and Jeff are probably realizing that whatever the heck is going on with Gwen and Miles, is important to them, or at least Miles.

Again, Jeff and Rio are worried, and they have no idea what Gwen's situation is, Miles mentioned she left town but they didn't even believe she existed prior this so they probably doesn't think that's case. Or even if it was, well, keeping contact can't be that hard in this day and age right?

(Sadly, Miles really needed to fall in love with a girl who to get in contact with you need technology from another timeline.)

Miles is 15, and they just met this girl, they couldn't imagine how much she matters to him, specially with all the secrets.

And here, is when Rio finally can let her own feelings aside for a moment, and see her actual son, and not the idea she has of him.

Of course, he is just staring at where she is at, no idea when he would see her again.

A part of me wonders, if he would had tried to go and say something else if his parents wouldn't had been here.

I really, do think Gwen wanted to say something else.

Now with all the context, it makes me so sad to see Gwen leave, and still have trouble to actually do so.

Because she knows this meeting wasn't suppose to happen, and she has no idea if she could ever repeat it or when. She has been so focused on Miles she completely neglected the mission, heck, she even neglected to keep an eye on the guy, which wasn't even so much of a fix for this situation.

You know? Something I kept thinking while analyzing this scene, is how is not just Miles struggling to keep a civial life and a spider life, Gwen is going to the same thing, or similar enough at least.

At this point, she has embraced the Spidey life, she literally has no other choice because she cannot go back home. Her life as Gwen Stacy was gone; being able to just be a carefree teen is left by the times she can be crashing at Hobbie's dimension, and even then, you see that is not enough.

In this sequence, she tries to go back to those patterns, like the camaraderie she had with May, or the jokes she probably shared with her dad's buddies.

But it doesn't go well, and her last moments with Miles were extremely awkward, and them discussing about the organization.

This all feels just like a bitter reminder, she can't be just a teen anymore.

Is a shame, because on the Clock Tower we basically confirm, that Miles was the only person that could make her feel that someone was seeing her for all her. To combine those two worlds she belonged.

But she can't have that now, just like she believes, she can't have Miles.

[methed-up-marxist]

it's good then that you were so upfront about loving fascist cock and thinking i was a piece of shit and yelling at me for being uncomfortable with you saying having sex with fascists that hated you was the best. you don't hide it by saying it's a joke, you just straight up hated me for thinking that sounded like something you were doing to hurt yourself and ESPECIALLY for me saying i would not want to do it myself

Anyway look at all I've written here on the body-fascism of certain quasi-heterosexual community's of heterosexual* men who are clearly deeply interested in trans women and yet aren't in dialogue with our specific discourses of identity.

Combined with my drawing out, in a delezian way, the ways in which we are all fascist a little bit and how these micro-fascisms work through mobilising sexual desire.

Can you see how a conversation about me having sex with a meth head who frequently threatened me with extremely intense violence due to paranoid structure in his mind produced by stimulant psychosis lead to an account of the semi-fascist nature of that paranoia while still needing to allow this struggling poor, queer, drug addicted crossdresser trying to take care of his Maori girlfriend but unable to do much for her because of what drug addiction had done to him.

And yes I took account of my sexual investment in this situation even as I tried to take care of him and tried to help him get back to some semblance of normality - I cooked for him because he'd been starving himself, I helped tidy his room because it was causing him immense distress, I held him as he cried because he wished he was a girl. And I enjoyed it and I refuse to deny my enjoyment of it.

You are taking the psychic structures I had to build so as I could be there for someone at the bottom of his life - structures of enjoyment - so yes I enjoyed being with someone who was experiencing proto-fascist modes of relating to the world (paranoid thinking, imagining secret enemies who control everything, outbursts of violence against people he doesn't understand his co-connection with)

This guy wasn't any more of a racist than you or me, he took care of a Maori lesbian who he loved and loved to the best of his abilitys.

If you see me being exhilirant and estatic about how my proximity to a set of micro-fascisms provided me the libidinal investment to be able to take care of this person even as he threatened me with explicit violence and just conclude I'm in some simple alignment with the more macro-fascisms. idk where to begin a dialogue with you, it seems my potential to be a person has been completely evacuated

I don't know who you are but you clearly know a lot about me as a person and that you can deploy this complex chapter in my life into me just being some prolific fucker of like commited fascists is well its precisely the fascist logic where any proximity to the unclean makes you unclean yourself.

I would never fuck a police officer, I would never fuck a fascist, I would never fuck anyone whose racism takes the form of out right statements of racism.

I don't know who u are, but u know who I am and it should lead you to some respect for the complicated situation u are clearly using to attack me

[frost-link]

Runaway Together

Sidon X Reader Angst <Part One>

"What the hell do you mean you're getting engaged?!" You yelled out, with your voice cracking. Pure anger flooded your mind like a raging river. It felt like every fiber in your being was ripped to shreds. You wanted to believe that this was some kind of joke that he was pulling on you. You wanted him to take back his words and never speak them again. Despite your quick, and rather spiteful response; you truly had not registered what he had said.

"Darling... Please.!" Sidon cried out to you very abruptly. His arms extended out in motion, as if he was trying to explain the situation to you more clearly. He paused for a moment, his mouth felt completely dry, he didn't know what to say. His golden irises couldn't even glance into your (e/c) ones. There were visible tears coming down his face, he felt frozen. You were reacting purely from emotions yourself. Logic had left the quiet meadow upon Ploymus Mountain long ago. Even the crickets had fallen silent to your raised tone.

"For what we had for years meant nothing to you?! How long did it take for you to decide that someone else was better than me, huh? A month, a week? Sidon! I loved you!" You had roared out to him, tears were starting to fall from your eyes yourself. Your entire relationship with Sidon felt like one giant lie. Everything you had together was flashing before your eyes. His words and actions that once moved you, quickly were suppressed and turned into apathy. Sidon was completely frozen, his eyes widened at your words. He felt a strong pang in his chest, as if he was shot with an arrow. He stepped toward you, trying his best to maintain himself in the moment.

"You're not listening to me! Will you just hear what I have to say before coming up with assumptions?!" He responded in a rather harsh tone. It was now your turn to be thrown off. Sidon was clearly overwhelmed and hurt himself. You had never seen this from him before. He was normally so confident and cheerful, You stared up at him in silence before speaking again.

"Assumptions?! You're getting engaged to someone when we have been together for years, Sidon!! You never had once proposed to me, and you expect me to act normal about this?!" You yelled back, hardening your tone. You started taking steps back from him, as he kept walking towards you.

"No! I just wanted you to hear what I-"

"I'm not listening to someone who just willingly decides to throw an entire relationship away like trash!" You snapped with venom in your tone. You weren't yourself, you were still not processing anything and it showed. You took one more step back before Sidon had shot his hand, quickly grabbing your wrist in a extremely tight grasp. He looked completely angered. You had grunted as he pulled you close to him as he was glaring down at you. He bared his sharp teeth towards you. He took multiple steps back dragging you along. "Sidon?! What the actual hell-" you started before he spoke.

"You are not listening! Would you just look!" He spun you around, you looked to see the edge of the cliff to where you were originally stepping back. Your emotions had paused for a moment as your heart skipped a beat. "You almost walked straight off that cliff!" He snapped, clearly angry from your words, even more so that you weren't paying attention to your surroundings.

"Sidon..." You mummered quietly. You had no words to throw back at him. He sighed closing his eyes for a moment, before looking into your eyes finally. His sunset colored irises finally softened.

"Now that I finally got your attention... Just let me explain. I wanted to propose to you for so long... The engagement is an arranged marriage that my father created a while back. I had intended to propose to you, however because of this unforeseen situation I couldn't. Can you now understand what I'm trying to say?" His voice was very tender and soft. Just thinking about it crushed him. The eye contact was very short lived, as he couldn't bear to see the pain in your own eyes.

"Sidon... If this is all true, what about what the Zoras were saying in the domain? The elder Zoras kept talking about how you had feelings for the supposed 'Lady Yona'... I suppose I never heard about it being arranged though. I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions." You rambled in a more softened tone yourself. However, your heart had stopped when you had mentioned the name 'Yona' after seeing Sidon's expression. He turned his head away from you before speaking.

"Lady Yona was my childhood friend, (Y/n)..." He had briefly paused, thinking back to his past. "Before you and I had crossed paths, I had complicated feelings towards my dear childhood friend. I've always seen her as an older sister. However, as we had both gotten older, things had started to become more complex between us. There was a moment where we hadn't spoken for such a long time because of everything that happened. Then, I fell in love with you." He said before looking back at you. "Since the engagement was announced, it was the first time I had heard from her..." He finished. His expression itself was purely complicated. Your response was almost instant.

"Do... You still like her?" You asked with dread in your tone, waiting for the worst answer to come. Sidon took a moment to think before he spoke, as if he was trying to pick his words carefully.

"That line... Was always blurred for me. I never had time to unpack my feelings towards her. Whenever I saw her, I could only think about the times I had spent with her and how she reminded me so much of my beloved sister. It would always hurt me to think about it, so I would dismiss it. At a time I would have said yes, however you know clearly that my love for you is strong. Whatever I might have felt in the past doesn't matter now." He said with raw emotions. Sidon felt beyond vulnerable speaking the truth to his lover, like he had just opened an old wound that was scarred over. You simply nodded in silence. There was a long moment of silence between the both of you. You, yourself were trying to find the right words to say back.

"Sidon, didn't your father even take into account the fact we are a couple?" You pondered. He gave you a look of uncertainty in response.

"My father did know that, yes. While we have been a couple, I never directly asked for his blessing to marry you. I didn't realize that he had intentions of stepping down as King... Hence why the arranged marriage was probably made." Sidon responded, thinking to himself. You slowly nodded, a little hurt at this new revelation. You had realized that all of this was from many miscommunications. He continued with a saddened tone. "I unfortunately don't know if I can reverse the arranged marriage, as it was made for political reasons, between my Domain and Lady Yona's Domain. Attempting to stop such a thing would certainly cause major consequences." Sidon had finished, filled with sorrow. You started to feel like crying again, however this time no tears could be formed from your face.

"I wish you could just escape from your royal duties so we could be together..." You mumbled, starting to fantasize an idea where the both of you ran far away from Zora's Domain just to be together. You could live in a rural area in Hyrule, perhaps by a lake, or even at Lurelin Village, the ocean was there... However you knew that this would never be a possibility.

"I would have loved nothing more, darling... However, my people are also important to me. To leave the Domain would be to betray them." He spoke quietly. You both continued to stand in silence once again before you spoke one last time.

"Then we need to find a way to solve this... I refuse to give up on us."

To Be Continued

[bailey-orphic08]

Okay, so- I have this Sander Sides AU that I've had for a long while now. And I think it would be neat to share it with you. I might also make several posts about it. So let me introduce you to:

Sanders Switched is an AU in which the sides' "roles" are switched around. To elaborate, their function (Logan as logic, Patton as morality, ect.) remains the same. Thomas' perception of them is what changes. So where Logan is the voice of reason in canon, another side would take his place. Here's all the sides in Sanders Switched:

Janus: Janus takes the role of Patton as the kind authority figure. He's seen as Thomas' self-preservation and always puts his safety and well-being above all else. He's a sort of motherly figure to the other sides, constantly caring about their well-being and acting as if he's older than them. He's much sweeter than OG Janus, but he still has a sassy side, and lives for gossip.

Remus: Remus takes Roman's role as Thomas' source of inspiration. He is seen as Thomas' comedic side and encourages Thomas to have as much fun as possible. Rather than being a Duke, he presents as a jester. He has issues with his impulsivity, and his jokes tend to be morbid and often mean, but he's overall harmless and much more tame than OG Remus.

The Orange Side: Obviously, I can't say exactly what the Orange Side will be, since we haven't been introduced to him yet. But based off what we do know, I place him in Logan's role as the voice of reason. Assuming he represents wrath of some sort--which is impossible not to believe at this point--he would probably be seen as Thomas' motivation, pushing him to get his work done.

Roman: Most people would probably switch Roman and Remus and make Remus, "good creativity," and Roman, "bad creativity." BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M COMPLICATED AND UNIQUE. So Roman takes the place of Virgil as the original, "antagonist." He is seen as Thomas' pride that pushes delusions that keep Thomas from growing as a person. He arrogant and rude, and claims he is a King rather than a Prince. Because of this, none of the sides really like him at all, with the exception of Janus. But near the end of season one, we discover that Roman only really wanted Thomas to achieve his dreams, and that most of his cockiness hid his secret insecurities. And after Thomas and the other sides realize how important he is, Roman is officially accepted as part of the group.

Patton: Patton takes the role of Janus as the antagonist to all of Thomas' beliefs and the possible leader of the dark sides. He is seen as Thomas' overbearing moral code that constantly tries push harsh rules rooted in Catholic Christianity onto Thomas and the other sides. He is extremely passive aggressive and overly judgmental towards the sides he deems, "wrong." Almost everything he says is a critisism of something Thomas or the other sides do. Despite being so harsh however, he loves puns and making jokes just as much the OG Patton, and loves to torture Logan with his puns.

Logan: Logan takes Remus' place as the bad influence Thomas tries to ignore. He is seen as Thomas' inner critique who judges Thomas for everything he does. He insists that Thomas' lifestyle is, "childish," and that he should abandon it for a, "mature," way of living so that he can live, "a normal, healthy life." He is extremely judgmental and criticizes all the sides for the smallest of details, making everyone hate him, even Janus. Despite this, he generally harmless, and he can easily be ignored.

Virgil: Virgil takes the Orange Side's place as the mysterious secret side that the fandom makes a million theories about. I can't fully explain who he would be, since, again, we haven't been introduced to the Orange Side yet. But for now, he still represents Thomas' anxiety. And when he reveals himself, he will call Thomas and all the sides out on their BS.

That's all for now. It isn't fully developed, and things will surely change when the Orange Side finally does reveal himself. But there's still a lot of things I would like to share. So please let me know if you want know more!

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

(Genshin Impact/ToCS) Shenhe, Beidou, Kokomi, Sara, Sharon, and Duvalie's S/O who speaks in opposites

No one requested this but I'M BRINGING IT BACK FOR PART 3 BAYBEEEEEE

And for anyone who doesn't get this, reader speaks like this when they mean something very nice:

Shenhe thinks her S/O was trying to pick a fight the very first time they spoke.

But upon realizing how panicked they were saying how hideous she looked, Shenhe thought something was up.

After giving them a bit more time to speak, she realizes that they're speaking in opposites.

Which is even more confusing to her.

Was this normal? She had been gone from human civilization for a while.

In some strange way, it helps her understand conversations a bit more speaking with S/O, because she has to pay attention to their facial expressions, not their words.

(Shenhe) "Is everything alright?"

(S/O) "Everything's going just great!"

(Shenhe) "Ah...A bad day, then. If you need to talk about it, I am here."

She will not question the way it helps, only that it helps her, and she's able to help her S/O in return.

Beidou's about ready to glass her S/O when S/O first spoke to her.

Being drunk did not make the translations any easier.

She squints her eye as she reads their facial expressions as they're casually saying the rudest things to her.

(Beidou) "...You uh...drink too much there, bud?"

After getting to know them, she can't help but stick around when she can. She definitely tells Ningguang about the case of the opposite speaking man/woman.

At first she thinks it's some kind of curse before learning they speak in opposites for the most mundane reason.

They didn't have the heart to tell their sibling their birthday present was atrocious, and then it just got out of hand.

Beidou laughed at that fact for a solid five minutes.

But Beidou quickly grows accustomed to how they speak.

(Beidou) "Miss me while I was out on sea?'

(S/O) "Of course I didn't, I'm disappointed you didn't crash and drown out there!"

(Beidou) snrrk! "Ha! Love you too, babe."

When S/O approached her and the other shrine maidens and immediately spouted out insults in a calm manner, Kokomi blinks in confusion.

(Kokomi) "Er...what?"

When they repeat the insult, with a more panicked expression, she figures it out.

(Kokomi) "Oh dear...is this a curse?"

Kokomi is determined to get to the bottom of this and wants to help them out.

...Before realizing that they weren't cursed, they just have a weird mechanism for lying.

Kokomi doesn't particularly mind, though admittedly it does take some energy to translate what they mean sometimes.

And when they call her the ugliest woman they've ever seen, it adds a week's worth of energy to her.

...As strange as that sounds.

(Kokomi) "+100 energy for S/O calling me ugly...Wait a minute."

Sara is highly unamused by S/O's thanks by calling her a ruthless woman.

(Sara) "Watch your tongue! Do you know who you're speaking to?"

S/O got down on their knees to apologize as the insults sprung out more.

(Sara) "...What?"

She's extremely confused as their expression showed they were sorry and panicking, but the words coming out of their mouth indicated otherwise.

Weirdly enough, it was Itto who managed to translate for them, making her even more confused.

Despite the harsh words used on her, and applying the backwards logic to their speaking, they held a lot of affection for her.

Which she didn't know how to feel.

It's kind of hard to have a heart flutter getting called the meanest, most hideous woman of all of Inazuma.

(S/O) "I'll be sure to burn this necklace in a ritualistic fire, Sara!"

(Sara) "...G-Glad to hear it."

Sara and Itto spend some time together to get S/O to say what they mean, lest they say the wrong thing around the wrong people and get into jail.

(Sharon) "...Oh my."

Sharon figures it out right away that S/O is speaking in opposites.

Her sadistic side can't help but play around them, acting offended, though it's obvious she's joking.

Her tone of voice is enough to make them stiffen in fear before she lets out a small giggle.

(Sharon) "Worry not, I understand what you mean. Though, is there any particular reason you speak like that?"

Honestly, Sharon was expecting something a bit more dramatic than a lie spiraling out of control.

But she makes sure that secret never gets out to anyone, and doesn't hesitate to drop in to translate for them.

(S/O) "You look ugly today, Sharon."

(Sharon) "Ah, thank you, you look quite hideous yourself."

(S/O) "S-Sharon!"

(Sharon) "Hah! My apologies, I couldn't resist. Thank you, dear."

(Duvalie) "SAY THAT AGAIN, I DARE YOU!"

Duvalie is about to deck S/O for talking mad shit. And the fact they actually had the gall to repeat themselves!

...Why do they look so nervous?

(Duvalie) "WHAT, LOST-...Your...Nerve?"

She takes a step back and closely watches their body language as they let out even more insults, sweating pinballs.

(Duvalie) "Uh...Are you alright?"

She has no idea why they speak like that, but quickly grows used to it.

Once she realizes what they actually mean, she grows pretty indifferent about it. At least until she thinks about it.

(Duvalie) "...Did you just call me ugly?"

(S/O) "I did, you're absolutely revolting to look at, like a coward in rusty armor."

(Duvalie) "..."

Duvalie doesn't know if she should be blushing or punching them right now.

(Duvalie) "Grr...JUST SAY WHAT YOU MEAN, DAMN IT!"

(S/O) "That's a bit rich, coming from you."

Now her eye was twitching. Option B was looking a bit more appealing now.

[koraesrambles]

Thoughts on the conclusion of Gotham War

Alright, so I've made it absolutely no secret that I've been enjoying the crap out of Gotham War. Is it structurally sound with good pacing and clear stakes? HELL no. It's not an air tight story, there are so many holes in all of the characters logic, but it is also an extremely good time.

I don't mind loose storylines in comics like this. Mostly because the premise "full grown man dresses up as a bat and cannot stop himself from mass adopting every orphan that looks like him" is already so ridiculous that anything they posit as a solution in their "war on crime" I think, "Yeah, I can see that." None of the rules of this world make sense.

But I don't really read most things for their air tight plot. Slight detour (There's a point, I swear!), but some perfect examples of this are Puss in Boots and the Last Wish and The Super Mario Bro movie. The last wish is PHENOMENAL. A literal work of art. I've seen it so many times and just basked in it's beauty. Love everything about it, absolutely stellar. But do you know what movie made me look up fan content, read fics, and forced me to buy the digital copy of the movie before the DVD came out? Yep. Mario Bros.

Why? Because I like stories about brothers who love each other and the mario movie gave me exactly that. It's not an air tight, phenomonal story with gorgeous real world applications, but it gave me a fun time where two characters worried about each other incessantly and honestly? that is what I'm here for.

So back to Gotham War. If I'm not actually looking for a ground breaking story (which honestly, I know those happen in these big super hero comic books but I feel like they're usually the *exception* rather than the rule) and just want good character interactions, then Gotham War delivered phenomenally. Especially since my favorite character was the one constantly being wrung through the wringer.

It was a great time. I enjoyed reading it, the art is better than anything I could ever produce even when the characters made weird faces. It was great. But did they stick the ending?

Eh, endings are hard. I would love to see more consequences for Bruce. Him just going off at the end and getting away with the horrible things he did to Jason is annoying. I almost wanted Jason to actually die at the end there, just so that Bruce would feel stupid and sad. If Bruce never acknowledges what he did to Jason (which . . . he probably won't, given the track record) then I'll be pretty disappointed. That's some juicy angst right there that should absolutely be addressed.

And I appreciated that literally every character that interacted with Bruce that knew about what he'd done yelled at him for it. Even Dick's seeming about-face at the end with "I'm sure you had your reasons" came after two weeks of getting used to the idea AND him trying to actually get Bruce to make good choices for once. I mean, Bruce doesn't, but A for effort, Dick. Thanks for punching him in the face last time, that was cathartic.

I surprisingly really like the fact that it wasn't Zur who did this to Jason. It was Bruce. Horrible, wacked-out, messed up Bruce Wayne who is so desperate to control everything around him and so terrified of losing the people he loves that he constantly overrides them like they're his freaking pets. Bruce is in a BAD place, and I sure hope that there will be tons of fics exploring that even if canon never acknowledges it.

But that's how I deal with comic universes like this. Everyone jokes that "Canon? what canon!" and we all laugh but honestly . . .yeah. Like, seriously. Canon is whatever works for the writer's plot in the moment. They make stuff up and contradict themselves all the time. They're constantly retconning stuff. It doesn't take away from any of the stories I like, I can still read them. And at this point, legitimately, I approach every single comic I come up on as though it's an AU. There is no canon timeline for me, because it's too messy. DC is literally just an AO3 platform that's allowed to make money.

Because the people who originally created these characters are long gone. These guys (gender neutral) writing and drawing the comics now are just fans like we all are. It's all fake. None of it is real. So let's all just have a good time.

I was talking to some friends about this and they pointed out, "It's difficult because people feel like when they're constantly screwing around with things like that why should they even care about the characters?" And they were absolutely right, that's extremely frustrating to deal with. I put a lot of emotional investment into characters, but every writer is going to approach the characters differently and with a universe like DC has, you just have to roll with it. There are no stakes. We all complain about it, but nothing is done to change it because we love these characters and we'll keep coming back for more, and so they keep having to make more content and that means messing with stuff they already have. It's a never ending cycle. These are living legends, mythology that's being written out in real time. Nothing about them are ever going to be cohesive.

Wow this is getting long, sorry about that. Things I loved about the Gotham War conclusion: Jason almost sacrificing himself and being a hero even though he was terrified. A+ content. Gorgeous, you go my boy! Tim telling everyone how to beat up all the rouges (Good job sweetheart, way to be a morally ambiguous little shit like you always are). Even if he claimed to be the second best robin at the end, those are fighting words my man. I also liked Jason's "Go 'save' another one of your sons." jab. That was great. I liked that everyone told Bruce he was wrong, even if it could have been stronger. The rest of the issue was plot stuff that I didn't really care too much about. I really like Bat/Cat, so I didn't mind those scenes too much even though Bruce is still the worst (affectionate AND derogatory).

I didn't really expect anything spectacular from the conclusion, and it really did end kind of like what I expected (nothing's changed except now Jason gets to deal with the Joker when he's sick with Super Anxiety -- which I actually am really excited for). But it wasn't as much fun as some of the previous issues.

That said, I would not mind owning an omnibus of all the gotham war issues, if just to re-read all of my favorite scenes. There were some truly unhinged crap in there, and that's just my cup of tea.

Story telling quality? eh, 6/10

enjoyment had? 9/10

[dsaf-confessions]

Following up on my previous confession (the one about DSAF characters but like with Genshin Impact kits)

Soooo, I thought long and hard about it, I’m adhering to game logic with their elemental types not their signature colors and what element best compliments those colors, so I’ll be doing a tiny bit of a deep dive into the characters themselves to explain why they get a certain element over another.

Dave and Jack are easy since we obviously know the most about them. Dave would most likely have a Pyro or Cryo vision depending on if we factor in flipside Dave or not. Pyro vision bearers are symbolized by raw blazing passion, I don’t think it takes much thought to notice how that applies to good ol Davey, but Cryo vision bearers all carry a theme of opposing will and/or very important internal struggles. If you factor flipside Dave into the equation then obviously you have the case for Dave being a Cryo Vision bearer, The willingness to listen to and execute Henry’s will opposing the rational mind trying to stop the bloodshed (I may be misremembering, but I think that’s what was going on with Dave and Davetrap splitting into effectively two different people)

Jack is a lot easier to pin down by comparison, he’s got a rugged exterior, blunt demeanor, and (at least according to the good endings) resolute will. Those would all be hallmarks of a Geo Vision, BUT Jack’s much more under that surface. He’s given up basically, he’s cynical and snarky not just because he’s a corpse but also because he can’t find the will to take most things completely seriously, his past actions have also shown a clear tendency to rebel (even if to a specific clear extreme [the fox]) and he acts in accordance not to what he believes is right but rather what he believes is the most entertaining. Jack Kennedy to me serves the feeling of Anemo over Geo, because not only does Jack fall into the running in-fandom joke for Anemo characters having at least one dead loved one, he also as a player avatar carries the core themes Anemo Vision Holders share those being free will and freedom of choice. Jack always has a Choice in the DSAF games, every ending is fundamentally based off of his choices. Nobody else’s choice determines the endings, only Jack’s choice matters in dsaf games. Jack CHOSE to take the deal with TRFB, Jack CHOSE to either help or ignore Dave, Jack CHOSE everything in his life his entire character hinges on the core aspect of choices that are pragmatically the player’s choices but in canon they’re his own.

I think I may have yapped too much with just those two, oopsie ‘:]!

Anyways weapon types are vibe based so TL;DR

Jack - Anemo/Catalyst

Dave - Pyro/Sword

.

[fourtyfourcatss]

୨⎯ "for @justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms " ⎯୧

ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯ PAUL VERLAINE !

❆ i am not sure whether or not you have read the novels, but i think paul verlaine is the perfect bsd matchup for you in many ways, the way your traits and values mash with one another, the lessons you could learn from one another, etc. in all honesty, i do not enjoy mbtis, but from how you have describe yourself, i can tell you are someone who can benefit from his practicality and logic, since it is so ingrained within his being to an almost inspiring level. the two of you can balance each other out greatly!

❆ now here’s the thing: he might actually be a little bit of a turn off for you at first. not only is he an assassin, he’s a deeply troubled individual who takes to his trusted people as support, heavily leaning on them emotionally (but subtly). i see the two of you meeting in some sort of garden, perhaps near your university, that he stumbled upon by accident. your friends perhaps, invited you out and ended up getting drinks, and you needed some time to yourself. cue the man himself entering. the atmosphere is languid and comfortable, enough that it cites him to make a remark, and you to follow along. many of these meetings occur, and develop. he’s a gentleman too, so count on him on treating you right!

❆ as for your hobbies, he would love to be able to talk with you about what you have read or read your writing! you can trust him for his honest opinion!

❆ he deeply appreciates your consideration for others, and i think he’s just the tad bit scared of what you’d think about him, since he has such a past and such a mindset. the guy doesnt even think of himself as a human being and started spiraling after that incident, and he finds it refreshing having you as a listener. i think you’ll make him start actually feeling better about himself and aid him in starting to curb those horrid thoughts he has had. he would most definitely get to know you at your most vulnerable and still embrace everything you have shown him. someone like him has a deeper appreciation and perspective to flaws, and he can really make you feel more secure about them. you do say you have high self worth though, but he is a very worried individual! but he gets it with time, and finds your jokes funny. he would most definitely admire your diligence and discipline, and being an observant person, would see the small signs of your overworking and stop you. not only that, you seem like a very indulgent person, so he’ll definitely be taking advantage of this to get a bit spoiled by you in some way (and then feeling a bit guilty afterwards).

ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯ ARTEM WING !

❆ a man who’s honest… caring, treats you like you deserve from the beginning… thats artem right there 💯

❆ the two of you are super cute together! artem is very awkward with his feelings, and you being an introvert means that he usually approaches you first, and then you attempt to make conversation with him too, and then he just freezes up. i think he’s the type to be very deeply in adoration of all your features and characteristics, especially your upright morals and values! but, he really doesn’t like how others sometimes would step out of boundaries and make you uncomfortable. he’s gonna be a bit protective of you, but nothing that’s very extreme or bad! and your organization is a boon for him, since being with someone who’s clumsy like himself would make it more burdensome than anything.

❆ absolutely indulges with you in your hobbies, even if he isnt a big fan of video games, but he still plays them if it is multiplayer! he probably practices in secret in order to get better but you didnt hear this from me. artem definitely is interested in the anime and other films you may watch, and will get very excited when you watch the war and art films he likes!

❆ i think he’d really like cuddling up with you! many date nights are half torn between casual like going to your place or his, or very fancy dinners. let this man spoil you‼️

ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯ LING YAO !

❆ finally… the resident funnyman is here! (most fma characters are pretty funny though but you get what i mean!) he will your days filled with laughter and happiness! i think he’d take a lot of inspiration and motivation from how you are as a person— especially your ambition! you are someone he can always rest with in times of turmoil and trust their words. the palace is filled with those of unorthodox and vile characters, and your judgement and advice is something he is counting on! your values align superbly with his too!

❆ you definitely attracted him with your pokerface and your sense of humor! not only that, placing him in modern times, he would enjoy all of your hobbies; even writing with you! if we go by actual historical accuracy like how arakawa intended, chinese gentlemen, especially of someone of ling’s standing, is expected to be able to write poems, play instruments, in short terms. he’s definitely able to play music for you to set some background music for your writings, and he’ll definitely be curious about your writings! he definitely gives some very good insight onto your works

❆ well read, harmonious, organized, can take care of yourself and others, having filial piety….this is good makings for an empress, no? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he’s definitely roping you back to his country after you’ve finished all your businesses here. maybe your family members too. lavish gifts and a heavy dowry will be given! you seem like the type to not be easily impressed, and he will spend days thinking of ways to impress and have your favor on his side! this is the most wholesome matchup here, you two would be so cute together :D

[a/n] enjoy my cooking!! i hope my assumptions about you based on your ask were all correct, and that you like your matchups! if you want, i can definitely state out runner ups. for bsd, i also considered ranpo for you. for tears of themis, it was marius, and for fma, i actually didnt have anyone else. hope you enjoyed!!

[blazehedgehog]

Has Earthworm Jim aged well?

No. Once upon a time I was going to do a video about this, I don't know if it's the right time for a video about Earthworm Jim.

Earthworm Jim is a victim of a lot of things. A lot of Shiny was born out of Virgin Games, right. Guys who worked on Disney games like Aladdin for the Genesis.

Some of those Virgin Games guys have been very forthcoming about the culture back then -- about the rental market being this big scary boogeyman. So developers would deliberately insert difficulty spikes in to their games. Things that were arbitrarily SUPER difficult, just to stump players who were on a rental, to make sure they couldn't finish the game in a weekend.

Because that's how you added length to a game back then. You just made it harder. The harder the game, the longer it took to finish. Once you realize this, it unlocks a lot about why older games were "Nintendo hard." (Sakurai very recently touched on this!)

Earthworm Jim has the unfortunate position of being one of those games. There's a very specific level -- the "Tube Race" segment -- that feels like it was added as one of those rental-blocking difficulty spikes. The idea is that you've been in this underwater facility for a while and there's a glass submarine you can pilot. Since its glass, bumping in to walls cracks it, and too much damage will cause it to implode and kill you. You also have an oxygen meter you have to refill too.

You play a pretty normal level that's a mixture of fighting enemies in the base with a couple of simple submarine segments. Where the level would normally just end, you get this Tube Race segment, which is one very, very, very long submarine maze where you have a minute and a half to make it to the end without running out of oxygen or damaging the submarine so badly that you die. It is ten times harder than everything to come before it, and one of the hardest parts overall.

But that's not enough to spoil the game, no. Earthworm Jim in general is also just... one of those games that is so in love with its own artwork that it kind of hurts the experience. It's one of those games where the animation and the jokes and the character comes before everything else, even at the cost of gameplay.

Video games have something called a "hitbox." Basically, what you see is not what the game actually understands as being your character. When you see this:

What the game is seeing is this:

These are the hitboxes around characters in video games. If blue touches green, that's a floor. If blue touches red, take damage. If blue touches purple, instantly kill the player. If blue touches yellow from below, grant item. That's how the game logic works.

And you may notice that a lot of early games have characters that very easily fit in to a square for this very reason.

From a technical standpoint and a player standpoint, it is extremely easy to read when and how things collide with each other.

Earthworm Jim (and to a lesser extent, Aladdin) is a game that says "Screw that! We've got REAL CARTOON ANIMATION!" And that's the priority: showing off the animation. Not playing well.

What are the hitboxes here?

In practice, it shakes out to something like this. There's no clear line to denote what you can stand on, because the background is drawn like a cartoon show, where characters are placed in a kind of slightly angled view, inside of the floor.

There are margins of empty air on everything -- Earthworm Jim can overlap objects and not actually touch them, and the same happens in reverse. That rigid, readable collision detection from games like Mega Man and Mario don't apply here. There's a little bit of guesswork in every action Jim takes.

Now, of course, with the advent of polygons, a lot of games have more vague hitboxes. It's harder to judge what is touching what, and we've developed a better sense for it, so maybe it's not that important, right?

Well, yes and no. Earthworm Jim was trying to show off, you see. It was one of the first games of its type. It's not doing this because it's a better way of handling collision detection (it isn't), it's doing it because it's trying to look flashy. It's trying to impress you. And that's all its using it for. It is deliberately and intentionally putting itself at a disadvantage in order to say "this is an interactive cartoon."

That thinking sabotages the entire game. I can guarantee almost every idea in Earthworm Jim started with pitching the characters and how they animate with the gameplay being left as the final afterthought. To Earthworm Jim's credit, it's not a total disaster, it's just very loose and unbalanced.

Do you remember The Order: 1886 for the Playstation 4? It was lauded for having beautiful graphics, but in practice there wasn't a whole lot else. It was more like a 5 hour QTE. A lot of great tech and incredible visuals, but not a lot of deep or engaging gameplay.

That is exactly what Earthworm Jim was in 1994. Except in Earthworm Jim was beloved, because nothing really looked or sounded like it did. Aladdin was a big deal for Sega, but Earthworm Jim was a clear and definitive next step, and it was on everything.

Nowadays, after a lot of its more technical ideas have been better solved, its problems stick out more, and more, and more. It's not unplayable (that right is reserved for Earthworm Jim 2), but it isn't great.

[visionsofmagic]

Hiiiiii... I've come to bother you again... It's just a stupid idea and you don't have to do anything with it... I'm sorry...

When we were at the very beginning of our career, a lot of people were joking, and someone, really believed, that in many years, we would take the place of Homelander, as a leader. Of course, Homelander himself didn't like this idea. But, sometimes, even to him that thoughts came, that he was not eternal, that, let it really be us, and not some "second-rate hero"... After all, the memory of him will live in us. But such thoughts are extremely rare, and he quickly banishes it.

But we never aimed for a place in the Seven. The Seven is directly associated with papa, respectively, if there is no papa, there will be no the Seven. The logic of the child works flawlessly. And now, that we have been away from all this for so long, we realized, that ratings and popularity are not an indicator of a real hero. Yes, we are talking about banal things, but saving the most unhappy and the happiest, the most diverse people, preventing a variety of problems, we came to the conclusion, that it is necessary to save qualitatively, not beautifully. Well, yes, of course, daddy's influence in us still remained. "The only super powers, that absolutely all people have, is creating new problems and putting everything and everything in danger. Well, we solve these very problems," and we smile innocently.

The triumphant return and getting to know the Seven again, a failed. We are already well aware of our daddy's affairs. And the rest of the supes, too. We wish we could never see their vile, corrupt faces... Well, in any case, we will not be angry at absolutely all the heroes, we have a specific goal.

We remember the Seven quite poorly, we didn't communicate with them much, when we were a child and a teenager. Well, it's clear why - dad's jealous nature. So, we don't see any global changes... Everyone is just as nasty, as before... Only thing, we don't remember this lady at all... Oh, Starlight joined when we were away, nice... "Well, it's very nice to meet you. Not bad, finally someone, more or less, close in age. You have a wonderful costume, Starlight." Well, at least she's nice and polite, and thanks for that...

Well, at least the ladies here aren't so bad, it seems... "Ladies and gentlemen, it was nice to see you all and, - we smiled at the blonde, - meet you. Have a nice day to you all. - We nodded towards the women, - ladies, - nodded to the men, - gentlemen, goodbye." We did not say goodbye to Homelander, who had been standing at the window, behind us all this time. "Gentlemen" is enough for him.

We tried to be very polite and nice to them. But this damned association between the Seven and Homelander... Okay, okay, fine, we're not a child anymore and we understand, that Homelander is not the whole Seven. Homelander is not all supes. Deep breath, look at the sky and calm dow.. Why is his... Not nice face staring at us, from every damn wall?

Yes, we understood, that we were rude and unfriendly with the leader of the heroes. No, we are not ashamed or afraid. No, we will not work with him in pairs!

Just fine... We yelled at Ashley, just like he yells at her... We need to apologize to her and find an exorcist, to expel this evil spirit from ourself...

And then, the day came, when a very beautiful lady, having learned about our whole situation with Homelander, told us, what an amazing confession he made to her once. About starting a family. About children. Oh, isn't that wonderful? So, all these rare: "well, it will sound very... Pathetic. But, Y/n, - dad hugged our cheeks with his palms, - you are a part of me. It doesn't matter, that we are not blood, you are my favorite and best, only one and precious child. - Papa gently kissed us on the forehead and hugged us tightly." "I love you, daddy..." "Happy birthday, baby. - And he touched his nose to ours. - I'm glad I have you..." Means nothing... Just wonderful...

Well, it was clearly not worth apologizing to Ashley... Not only, do we have the same task with him, so we also had to sleep in the same room with him..! "Oh, run, stupid woman, oh, run..."

The night was surprisingly cold. Usually we are not very sensitive to cold/not worry much about temperatures/quite sensitive to cold, but tonight we were frozen. We're chilled to the bone. And Homelander lay down next to us and hugged us, pressing tightly to him... And he also told us to shut up and get warm... And that's where the problem arises. We don't want to breathe the same air with him, but he's so warm... He's so warm, and... So cozy... So familiar... It feels, like none of this happened, and everything is fine. We're safe, with papa...

And last week such, well, an embarrassment happened... Well, in short, while we were pulling out this idiot, who arranged all this, from under the rubble, a large piece of concrete rolled down the column at us, with rebars sticking out of it... And we didn't see it, we tried to save this dumbass. And... Well... And, Homelander covered us with himself... Naturally, he was not injured, he is Homelander, after all, only a torn costume and a couple of minor wounds... But. But why? Why did he do it? And then, he turned to us... He looked at us, with his sad, bottomless eyes and...

Oh. Well, that makes sense then... Just look at how his ratings soared after that incident. Just wonderful...

I needed an empty head to read this one (why I couldn't read it so far, waiting a little) because after reading the first passage I understand that you are using a very interesting and wonderful writing style and again (yes again) I am saying that you should really be the one who write this one.

you are already have a map on your mind, every character's design and features, how scenes from series changed with y/n's presences, how she had an inner self that really complex. I loved every detail from the first message to this one and I see how your ideas on the story grew well and strong as a whole. so, again, I am asking you to write this magnificent pieces as a story on your own or we definitely can collaborate. I really want you to the writer of this one and me as an assistance or helper.

think about this and thanks for making the story more and more interesting and permanent in my mind. I really want to read it from you, or well write it down it you want me to again. but I hope you will be the one because I loved the way you express your ideas into words. ♥️

[fountainpenguin]

If you were given the opportunity to reboot FOP from the ground up, what would you change, shake up, or put your own spin on?

I'll have to give this a short answer, I no joke spent over 2 hours replying to this, then added a Read More and Tumblr told me that my post was too out of this world and it broke the editor. It kicked me out in a split second without any opportunity to save. Sorry to everyone who has to scroll past my stuff in the future, but I'm not living through this again. Read Mores have no place on my blog.

I'm furious because 1) I tried to copy-paste out of this editor like I always do and save in an external place, but the new editor is busted and only copies one paragraph when you do CTRL-A so I gave up, and 2) literally the last sentence I wrote before typing that was "Before my hiatus, Read Mores broke stuff, but I'm willing to give this another try." It's not even the same error it used to be. I can't. I can't.

At least we're friends and I think you know a lot of my thoughts anyway. Sorry it took so long to write an answer to this message, but I've already let it sit for so long that I HAVE to get it out of my inbox now or I'll never go back to it after losing everything :/ I can't believe that just happened. How ironic that one of the main reasons I went on hiatus was because stuff kept breaking and then it's worse when I return. Bleh.

So... Here's the short version of things I can remember talking about:

Update world lore, especially regarding Anti-Fairies. Anti-Fairies debuted in Season 2 and didn't reappear until Season 5; Anti-Fairy World itself made its first appearance in Season 6 because the Anti-Fairies were only seen in jail before that. Anti-Fairy World is kind of barren and stereotypical, and the general vibe of Anti-Fairies is that they are all evil because their magic revolves around bad luck. I'd prefer some gray area. I also feel like the characterizations for Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda were rushed and we should say it.

Logically I know that Anti-Wanda can be said to parallel Wanda's high-class mafia upbringing, but I doubt that was planned since Wanda's family only showed up in Season 5. In another universe, we could have had a classy evil queen. I love the grubby gal, but there are so many cool aesthetics she could have had instead. The Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda vibe doesn't bring anything to the table that Cosmo and Wanda didn't already have unless you take creative liberties.

Maps. Maps would have been great.

Designs. Cosmo, Crocker, and Dad really don't need the same shirt. Wanda's outfit is pretty bland too, and it's honestly a shame that Anti-Cosmo got a unique outfit but Anti-Wanda's is just a recolor of Wanda's. See also, classy queen.

Also I've never liked Timmy's Channel Chasers adult design; I just don't think it's in character. I feel like his body type would be much closer to his parents, and the existing one is just too extreme for my preferences. Doesn't say "Timmy the average kid" to me.

"Fairly Odd Baby" - As much as I enjoy the idea of Fairies placing a ban on babies because they're destructive and Fairy World likes to push away its problems, I'd have introduced Poof as part of an announcement that Cosmo and Wanda had been expecting a baby for 100 to 1000 years. Their lifespans are so long, it wouldn't be out of the question. A reveal episode could have been fun.

I also don't think I would have chosen to leave Poof a baby who can't speak for that long; I think he has a fun personality (Sasses Foop, deliberately puts Foop in harm's way, but also he's super chill and nice and likes sports) and I would have liked to see more episodes where he talks. I don't love how he was shipped to boarding school as soon as he was able to talk and dialogue was needed.

Vicky takes Mark back onscreen. She canonically decided she wanted to start dating him again, after she found out he was an alien and she broke up with him. She made the choice to take back her alien boyfriend and she loves him and we should talk about it. I'm obsessed with them and will forever treasure the deleted "Foul Balled" scene of them holding hands at the senior home while Mark is in his squid form. I support Vicky becoming the shapeshifting queen of a violent planet and being extremely in love with her squid husband.

Chloe / A.J. friendship. A.J. ended world hunger in Season 2 and he built a time machine a few seasons later, I feel like those two would have really hit it off.

More episodes of Timmy playing soccer. I will not re-elaborate.

More of side characters I love, like Molly and Kevin. I love them. I love Kevin falling farther and farther behind his uncle when they walk together, I love Timmy introducing himself to Molly's fairy by shaking her hand... They might be side characters but I feel like they add a lot more to the world and character dynamics in their few scenes than many of the characters do.

Sharing fairies. Timmy sharing fairies with Chloe (or Kevin) as part of a temporary program (like she was just here for one school year before her parents moved again). I think one of the issues people have with Chloe is that it feels like she's here for the rest of Timmy's fairy-related life, and I think a few months of hanging out with her would have been plenty and then there would have been a reason for her to leave the canon afterwards.

Make Chloe Dinkleberg's niece. My favorite headcanon. Also a perfect explanation for why Chloe's family would move to Timmy's street. Also a hilarious parallel of Timmy seething with frustration at his "perfect" neighbor despite spending the entire series making fun of his dad for doing the same thing.

More Timmy/Chloe "step-sibling" interactions. I support Timmy "I will sit with you while you have an hour-long panic attack" Turner in "The Booby Trap" but I cannot emphasize enough that I equally support Timmy "Will take a call from Chloe, listen to her explain that she vaporized a juice box, then hang up and go to bed" Turner. They are step-siblings...

Timmy, Chloe, and Kevin. I support Timmy - Chloe - Kevin trio interactions in general. They're a comedic trio and I want them to support each other.

Gary and Betty. Unironically, we need to talk more about Gary and Betty canonically being aware of the magical world. Or at least they adjusted really fast to being teleported from California to Florida and back again. Also we should talk about that time Gary rang Sanderson on his cell phone, which gets funnier the longer you think about it. Also I love them and we should talk about the deleted "Totally Spaced Out" scene where they tried to flee to Mexico together.

Ending the series with a proper send-off. I'm not a fan of Timmy keeping his magical memories after losing Cosmo and Wanda. Being the protagonist doesn't make him immune. I feel like there are so many ways this could have been done in a sentimental way that people would have loved... I'm sad we didn't get a proper send-off.

On the list of things we don't need to change - Imaginary Gary, Norm, Mark, Molly, Jorgen, the Pixies, Flappy Bob, Foop, and Ed Leadly. They are flawless, 10 of 10. We also do not need to change Chloe casually swearing, but meanwhile Timmy will call you out for saying "Moron" on the radio, and we definitely don't need to change "This isn't a fancy French restaurant- this is a black hole!"

I love the Pixies. If they didn't exist, I would have come along and prepped some worldbuilding about characters who maintain magical paperwork. I love my snarky monotone wasp boys.

Also I just want to shout-out Chloe and Kevin and their personalities being hilarious. I think there are several Chloe-centric episodes that have flawed storytelling, but I do genuinely enjoy the character you're left with after brushing off some of her exaggerated perfectionism.

Kevin has some of the best dialogue in the entire series, and those two just seem to write themselves when you pit them together. I like the mental image of Chloe venting to Timmy about how unfair it is that Crocker shows him favoritism and then it slowly dawns on her that she also has a history of getting a lot of favoritism.

Thanks for the ask! I'm sad I lost the full responses, but I think I've learned my lesson and will draft in an external doc first. Please learn from my mistakes, I will not take back my venting >:(

Even if I lost it, it's nice to take some time and think about some answers to these things. I'm also pretty satisfied that I was able to make this post long enough to feel like a good answer. Yay.