#I know I caused all the problems but I just want them to be happy again
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I'm in no way invalidating this post, as I assume it's US-centric. But it's a stark reminder how vastly different the work cultures are there and in Germany where I live and work.
Yes, you don't have to tell your boss everything, and in some instances it's a good idea to say less, but if you have any kind of long-term illness or condition, it actually is a good idea to talk about it with your boss (and HR + the work's council, if you have one). Good employers in Germany will then do their best to accommodate for your needs so they can keep you and make things work out for you. They tend to have a more long-term mindset where they want to help the employee get better or find better ways to be a happy (and yes, with that productive) employee.
That's not always the case either; especially internationally operating corporations here are a bit more cut-throat, so it's a good thing to know the company's mindset well, but it's a tendency.
Also, there are actual laws that prohibit them from firing you for something like that. There are limits, for example if you're actually sick (off work) for too long repeatedly with no prospect of improvement that can be a just cause for termination, but the employer has the duty of proof in that instance. If they cannot prove that your absences are too detrimental to the company's well-being for them to tolerate it, you can sue for reinstatement or damages.
At my current company, I've been immensely lucky, because even for German standards the mentality there is extraordinarily understanding and supportive. When I told my boss that I was burned out and had to take a week or two off (on fully paid sick leave, mind you), he said "Two weeks might not be enough. Take as long as you need." So I took four.
I was in the process of switching departments, so I had a conversation with my next boss too and asked if I could work from home completely for a while. He seemed very understanding, and I then told him the whole story - because he also needed to have some kind of prospect and know how long it was gonna take etc - so I said I was in the process of being diagnosed for ADHD and that I just couldn't manage also having to go into the office.
Now that I have the diagnosis and will soon hopefully get my meds, there's that prospect, and we said for now, I was gonna come in one day a week (usually 2 is mandatory) for a while until I feel ready to be there two days again.
That was only possible because I explained what was going on with me; the transparency also gave the employer a positive outlook and a feeling of trust, and when your company's mentality is built on those kinds of values, it makes for a million times more pleasant AND productive working environment. I mean, just by how this all was handled I do feel very loyal to my company now. (I'd be stupid to leave, frankly, lol).
And from many other cases I know how they reacted too. A colleague had to stay at home because she had pregnancy complications - no problem. Another one sometimes has to leave early or work from home because she has frequent and heavy migraines. Sometimes people have to do the same because of something to do with their kids. Everyone is usually fully transparent about it and it really helps create an atmosphere of openness and trust.
TL;DR: Err on the side of caution, yes. But do inform yourself of your legal rights in your country, and the mechanisms in such situations. Suss out the company's approaches to various issues and know their policies. Sometimes, when the outside conditions are in your favor, being transparent about your situation can be the better choice.
Hey here is your friendly reminder to not tell your nice boss stuff.
I’m at the executive management level for my very small company and I have 4 people who report directly to me. I am a nice boss. I’m friendly with my employees, I treat them like professional adults, I actively try to create a positive work environment, and I mentor them and make sure they’re advancing in their careers. I do my best to shield them from the rest of management doing stupid shit. My employees like working for me.
The other day one of my employees came to ask if she could change her hours on Mondays. I said yes immediately because it’s helpful for me to know when she’s here and when she’s not, but as long as she gets her work done I don’t care when and where she does it. She then proceeded to tell me that it was so she could attend therapy and like … I will never use this information but … as a general rule don’t fucking do that.
Do not tell your employer shit about your mental or physical health except for the bare minimum needed to request a reasonable accommodation. Even your nice boss can fire you, even your nice boss can unfairly change your working conditions, and even your nice boss at some point is probably going to face pressure from their superiors.
I’m not saying don’t trust your boss with anything ever. I’m just saying that anytime you are in the workplace you need to keep your private information private. You can still have a good relationship with your boss. Your workplace can still be pleasant. But if it ever feels like disclosing private information is required in order to have a good relationship with your boss, please see that as a red flag.
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this is gonna make me sob into my pillow but #2 angst thingy with pedri 😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣
Peace — Pedri González.
Pairing: Pedri González x Fem!Reader
Summary: Breaking up after a a three year long relationship had hurt you tremendously, but when Pedri had texted you that he got injured and wanted you to come to the hospital… well you couldn’t say no.
Word count: 1.47k+
Disclaimer/s: Based off the prompt ‘Hold me, please?’ , angst to comfort / fluff.
A/N: hi im on an angst kick don’t expect much happiness coming out of bea’s blog.
You reread and reread Pedri’s text. Over and over and.. you get the gist. You couldn’t help the pity that built in your heart, but you also couldn’t help the anger that arose along with it.
It had only been a week, for God’s sake. You’d broken up a week ago and the wound was still fresh. Angry thoughts clouded your mind the whole drive to the hospital, all the way up the elevator, to the door, but the second it opened and your eyes landed on the man you had folded.
Every rage filled feeling disappeared, replaced by the overwhelming urge to comfort him. You hold back, cautiously poking your head through the door. “Uh, can I come in?”
At one side of the bed was Pedri’s mother, only furthering to the awkwardness of it all. Seeing your ex and his mother a week after you’d broken up was not something you imagined happening, yet, here you were.
María stood, her eyes darting between her son and the woman she’d grown to adore so dearly. She had to fight the smirk threatening her lips when she saw the tension in her son’s shoulders depleting.
“I’m going to the cafeteria to find your father.” She says, patting Pedri’s head, “it’s nice to see you again.” She offers you a kind smile before rushing out of the room.
“You too..” You begin, but she was already long gone. Left alone in the depressing hospital room, you find your gaze drifting to his leg. “Jesus..” You mumble.
Pedri doesn’t say anything, simply letting out a quiet hum of acknowledgment. He watches you carefully as you make your way to the side of his bed.
“I don’t.. I don’t really know what to, uhm—“ You were grasping at straws for something to say. Nothing came to mind, causing a flush to spread across your cheeks along with a nervous laugh.
The tan man couldn’t help the way his eyes softened and the small, barely noticeable smile of his lips. He’d missed you. Everything about you, he had missed. The breakup of course, was his fault. He been so stressed with football that he’d taken it out on you, saying things he didn’t mean but couldn’t take back.
“You don’t have to say anything.” He speaks, wearily. He wanted so badly for you to just look at him, he didn’t blame you for avoiding it, though.
“I feel like I probably should, I mean.. this is..” You were once again, at a loss for words. “I’m so sorry, this sucks.” Pathetic. That was pathetic.
Pedri was unfortunately, very injury prone. You’d been in this position many times, but this was different. You couldn’t rush to his side, you couldn’t shower him in apologetic kisses, you couldn’t do the things you used to. And those were the only ways you knew how to comfort him.
Your legs brushed against the hospital bedsheets, when you remember. “Oh! Shit, I almost forgot, I set them down outside the door because I wasn’t sure if they would be appropriate right now.. Wait, I’ll be right back.” And just like that, you were gone, leaving Pedri completely and utterly confused.
When you returned, you had a blanket and, what you’d called the ‘designated hospital hoodie’ in your hands. He recognized them instantly. Your favorite hoodie of his, and the blanket you’d used specifically on the nights he’d stay over and the two of you would fall asleep on the couch.
“I figured it would get cold in here, it always does.” You gingerly hand him the items, freezing when his fingers brushed against yours.
Pedri froze as well, his eyes snapping up to you. “Sorry, uhm, thank you. Seriously.”
“It’s no problem.” You cough, “so! How are you? How bad is it?”
Shaking his head with a tired sigh, Pedri winced as he scoots over on the bed, his jaw clenching as he does. “Joder. [fuck] ” He hisses in Spanish, taking a second to speak again, “you can.. sit down y’know?”
Hesitantly sitting onto the uncomfortable mattress, your eyebrows furrow, “you shouldn’t be moving so much.” You scold, easily slipping back into your old concerned girlfriend mode. “How many times do I have to remind you there are plenty of chairs I can sit on?”
“And how many times do I have to remind you, that I prefer you closer?” He rebutted, the both of you pausing when you realize you weren’t allowed to do this back and forth anything.
But, you shrug the feeling off. Despite how things had ended, you loved Pedri. You cared for him. He was hurting, and you were not about to make him hurt any more by opening up the wounds that were still fresh.
“Well, your comfort is a bit more important than your wants.” You crack a small grin, “how did surgery go?”
Pedri huffs through a painful exhale. “I don’t want to talk about medical shit anymore. I’ve had to deal with my families badgering all day…” He hesitates before continuing, “I know this is overstepping, but could you just.. lay down? You don’t have—“
“I’d lay down if you weren’t hogging all the pillows.” You tease, “move your big head.” Shifting around to a sitting position beside him, you wiggle around till the thin blankets were out from under you and on top of you.
He laughs, the sound sweet and welcoming to your ears. You turn your head to the side, meeting his eyes directly for the first time since you stepped into the room. “This is only mildly weird.”
“Yeah.” He agrees, taking the blanket you’d brought and spreading it out over the two of you. “Another boundary crossing question…?”
“I don’t see why not.” You swallow, not knowing what was about to come out of your ex’s mouth.
“Hold me?” He asks with the saddest eyes, “please?”
Listen, you were no fool. You knew your actions would have consequences. This simple act was going to either lead to your heart breaking even more, or potentially causing you to go against your morals and allow forgiveness.
You couldn’t get yourself to speak, instead, you lift your arm to wrap around the back of his neck and your hand came up to rest on his head. Pedri automatically relaxes against your shoulder, letting out a long breath of relief.
You stay like that for a while, your fingers threading through his soft hair while the other hand occupied on his cheek, it’s fingers rubbing smoothly back and forth along his cheekbone. It had always been the way you calmed him down when he was upset. The familiarity tugged at your heart strings and in that moment you didn’t care how badly this was going to hurt you, you only cared it would make him feel better.
Plus, he always told you how much peace he felt when he was in your arms, and thats all you wanted him to feel in the moment.
“Pedri?” You quietly beckon him to look at you, which he does. His eyes fluttered open and a small hum leaves his lips. “You know I can’t stay..”
He tries to hide his disappointment, but you knew him too well. “I understand. Sorry, I shouldn’t have even asked you to come, I know I hurt you.”
“Hurt is one way to put it.” You quirk an eyebrow, hiding the genuine words behind a teasing grin.
His eyes flicker around your face, noticing every crack in your expression. “I am sorry. I didn’t mean the things I said. I can do better, I will.”
“That’s not enough. The things you said.. Pedri, I can’t just forget them.” Exasperated and ready for the conversation to end, you tap his head. “Just lay back down.”
Pedri shakes his head, “no, we need to talk—I need to talk about this! I don’t want you to forget, just hold me accountable and give me another chance.” His tongue darts out, wetting his lips. “Please, cariño.”
That stupid, stupid, stupid pet name. The only one you ever really loved when it left his lips.
“Can we talk about this when you’re not suffering from an injury? Like, what, two months? When your head is clear, and i’ve had time to get over what you said.. you call me. Then, we can talk about it.” You push his head back onto your shoulder and rest yours against his hair.
“Okay. Two months?” Pedri’s hand that had wrapped around your waist, dips under your shirt, rubbing slow circles. “I can do that.”
Pressing a short kiss to his hair, you hum. “I’ll leave when your mom comes back. Don’t text me or contact me till those two months are up, got it?”
Pedri groaned, “nothing?”
“Nothing.”
“Fine.” He rolls his eyes.
likes , comments , and reblog’s are all appreciated. lmk if you’d like to be tagged in any pedri posts.
DTS , @halfwayhearted @sakashq @hrts4havertz @joaoflms @spidybaby @gadriezmannsgirl @unx100to !
#pedri gonzalez#pedri gonzalez x you#pedri gonzalez one shot#pedri gonzalez x reader#pedri gonzalez imagine#pedri imagine#pedri x y/n#pedri x you#blurb#football#angst#pedri gonzalez angst#fc barcelona
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Okay here we go
Does Stanfraud's eye still bleeds, like when Bill was possessing Ford or doesn't because of his bigger connection to Ford's body?
Is Stanfraud an uncle/big brother figure to Soos, like Stanley is his dad figure? Does Bill even care about him even a little😢
I know that the main focus of this au is on Bill, but since Stanley didn't try to pretend to be Ford, how did Stanley's and Filbrick's first meeting went after the whole "getting kicked out" thing"? Especially since both Stan and Ford were definitely broke at the time
You mentioned that Bill still has access to a little portion of his powers, what are they exactly?
Anyway your au is genuinely awesome and seeing it on my dash is always a huge treat 💛💛💛
Okay the first question I really want to answer because I’ve been thinking about this:
— His eye definitely bleeds on occasion. Even though he is far more connected to Ford’s body here, he’s still a demon possessing a host. He shouldn’t be there. There’s some outer force keeping him trapped. So I have thought about the fact there would probably be some lasting impacts on the body due to possession exposure for so long, such as the eye bleeding becoming a regular problem and gradual loss of vision in that eye. There may also be other physical impacts, but I’ll work on those when I manage to get down an official design for him.
— Great News! He is like Soos’ weird uncle! That may be where he learned to be somewhat decent around kids, honestly. He absolutely tried to mess with him at first, make jabs, tell him the date of his death, attempt to drive him to madness just a little (this is why Stan had to get rid of the last handyman), but Soos proved to be incorruptible and took all of Stanfraud’s weirdness in stride. Bill does end up caring about him. He goes as far as to liking their conversations. Soos keeps up with his chaos! Even Bill isn’t sure what’s going on in that head of his (when he gets his own body back he’s going to find out).
— Though Bill is the main focus of the plot-change, the other aspects are equally as important and so I’m glad they also have people’s interest! Their first meeting is… tense, to say the least. If Filbrick has any regrets, which I think I’ll leave up to interpretation, he’s far too stubborn a man to show them, and would rather dig himself further into a hole than admit he made a mistake. Stan desperately just wants to ignore all the scathing comments and get this little reunion over with, until Filbrick makes a comment about Ford, then Stan snaps. You can insult him, he probably deserves it, but not his brother. Sure, they may not be his brother right now, but the intent is there, and that’s what counts.
It cuts everything short, with Stan grabbing Fraud and telling him they’re leaving (He doesn’t complain).
With Filbrick, I do kind of want to explore their dynamic over the years while he’s still alive, especially with Stan, but also with how he’d treat ‘Ford’ and his odder behaviour. I don’t want to just make Filbrick a one-dimensional character though, as I think there’s a lot to be said about the cycle of abuse and parental projection so. While the AU may be based around the question ‘what if Bill got stuck possessing Ford?’ The answers it has lead me down a lot of different paths to explore — such as this!
— The powers he has access too lessen over time, but currently he is somewhat capable of seeing potential future outcomes (ciphervoyance), pyrokinesis, telekinesis, faster healing factor and teleportation. Note that all of these are in a much weaker state and drain Ford’s body and by extension Bill heavily — especially teleportation. Doing that once can cause him to pass out, so it’s more of an emergency thing, most his abilities are honestly. Too much focus is required.
And I’m so happy to be a little treat on your dash!! I hope you enjoy all this just as much!
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proving how respectful Warriors (2024) is with MATH
american street gangs are one of the most lied about groups of people in this country. we have, essentially, copies of the same law in many cases: carjacking minimum penalty is 3 years in state prison, but if a prosecutor can argue it's a gang-related carjacking, it's 18 years in state prison to life. and gangs are super vaguely defined in the law, so in practice it's a shortcut to get poorer, darker-skinned folk punished more for the same crime. our tax dollars are funding a million cop shows telling us how scared we should all be of gangs. in classic outgroup propaganda, they are always simultaneously primal, uneducated kids who don't know what they're doing and also conniving, hierarchical masterminds conspiring against us.
in reality, they're community-based organizations of the people who stepped up when the neighborhood's law enforcement stopped settling the small disputes and started creating big ones. as with many large powers, they're often mismanaged and misogynistic and very territorial (though there's a case to be made about how those problems are all sustained by the cops), but fundamentally they're human beings taking care of each other, feeding and clothing each other, holding each other accountable, paying for their kids' educations, and being family. and we can all agree on those things. it's just the word "gang" that's been soured. to be clear, it's a lot less soured for the people still living gang life than the types of folk who might buy an album cowritten by the Hamilton guy. the album wants us to care about these kids' struggle without us bringing preconceived baggage to their table. so here's what it does about that.
when you summarize to your friend what Warriors is about, you use that word. gang. it's kinda the whole premise. but how much do they say that word? pop quiz, without scrolling down, can you name a single instance of the word "gang" appearing in Warriors? there aren't zero, but there aren't many. really, try.
they say "crew"! 19 times in fact. and crowd, 5 times. and team (2) and turf (14) and i read corner (24) as a recurring motif for loyalty. West Side Story isn't even really about gangs, has a lot less words, and has gang 11 times. gangs are the basis of the plot of Warriors, but it's not what it's about. consider, for reference, that truce appears 9 times and crew 19 and beautiful 16. esperanza 6 and quiet 15. alive has a grand total of 45. and train? 58.
time's up, here's the answers: "every fly by night gang who wants to see the shore", "one big happy gang gang gang", "if some other gang gets the drop", "so now this chick's in the gang like?", "you're the baddest gang in the city, it's true", "every gang in the city wants to kill us"
let's dig in. it's just eight in the whole thing, and half of them are from a single Luther song. there's so many words in this thing total. and 8 is less than 9, the number of featured gangs including the cops. almost all of the invocations are referring to other people, derogatorily at that. the exception is Ajax being kinda facetious. 5 of them are essentially about hypothetical groups. 1 is the nypd. it's possible when you were mentally scanning the lyrics for "gang" you did what i did when i first realized this and thought for places someone might be trying to say "we're a big bad gang" but that never happens. cause Lin and Eisa write them like real people and use our preconceptions responsibly. and sometimes what that means is writing about a thing without using the most common name it's been given.
and bwawwk! what about bwawwk!? 28.
#people always asking me do any of your posts do numbers? and hoho well you could say that#warriors album#warriors concept album#warriors musical#analyzing the themes#note i'm including tren as train and bkwawwk as bwawwk otherwise feel free to check my work i'm a liberal arts kid and did this all by hand
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To begin the ninth episode of Bad Guy, My Boss off with these two making out in Elyes' office is rude because Director Term has given pink equal light for the first toxic couple of Run and Fei Long and now Thiranai and Thiti get the blinding light of love.
If I was Black Brooding Elyes, I'd be livid too knowing that everyone is getting action in his bedroom and office EXCEPT HIM!
I know Pat knows Thiti is a spy, so I understand he is acting his secretary ass of here.
But . . . Elyes has to be on this too because there is no way he would let Pat argue with him like this. He is upset at Pat for calling him a boss, so my petty sibling in sin would make sure to remind Pat that he is the boss, and Pat is the employee by sending his ass on this trip regardless if Pat wanted to go or not!
Look at the barrier between them! Thiti, you getting too smug, son!
Thiti, that man doesn't love you! He is manipulative and abusive. Get your stuff from the office and run!
YES! My color-coded boys in love might be pendejos but they aren't stupid!
I could never hate Elyes! NEVER! Pat and Elyes are in the midst of a fight, yet Pat still runs to Elyes and tells him their fight is dumb because more important shit is going down, and ELYES LISTENS! There are so many couples out there that argue and let the argument get in the way of critical business, but not my boy Elyes. He is all ears and eyes!
They can't communicate about their relationship, but they are sure good business partners. They balance each other out at work, yett causing chaos everywhere else. Good for them.
Pat calling Elyes immature while pouting is why I love this show. They are both problems, and they both love it.
And now Elyes is going to eat like a commoner because he loves his Happy Human.
AND HE WILL SUFFER BECAUSE OF IT! Watching a person sweat when they eat something spicy is the closest I will get to experiencing real love because it makes my heart so happy. He is just eating in pain and being miserable all because he loves a boy.
Pat is me, and I am Pat. Never been happier than watching a man try not to cry.
The bathroom scene is perfection! They are both naked, vulnerable, no colors, no barriers between them, and Elyes is sooooo happy.
But Pat? Oh, Pat has Elyes all heated up and now he is about to hurt him with hard questions, and I am thrilled!
Look! Look at his face. Realization is hitting him! They are entering into a fight that he didn't even see he was walking into!
LOOK AT HIM!
And now we are right back to the point the colors keep making — Elyes is doing the most all so he doesn't have to do the bare minimum. Pat has said he loves him. Pat has shown he is loyal. But Elyes is so afraid that if he says "I love you" back that it's all going to blow up the same way it did with Run, but by him not saying it, Pat won't continue to be in what he believes is a one-sided situationship. Elyes already used the day's quota of brain cells, but I need my pendejo to stop arguing while literally naked, and instead get emotionally exposed, and TELL PAT HE LOVES HIM!
But instead he is going to put a hit out on the person who hurt Pat even though his ass has been emotionally hurting Pat for years.
Doing the damn most when he could be doing the bare minimum. I hate him (affectionately).
#never change elyes!#bad guy my boss#color coded boys in love#this could never be my guilty pleasure#because I don't feel guilt#all I feel is lots of pleasure#every week is exactly what I need from this show#seriously! I love Elyes#he is just so stupid#episode nine#the colors mean things
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✩ ˛˚ . Use your words ✩ ˛˚ .
Synopsis: You and your husband decide to try something different. As he’s tied up, nude, and at your mercy, you restrain from initiating anything until Reiner tells you verbatim what he needs.
Pairing: Reiner Braun x fem!reader
Genre: smut
a/n: my obsession for Reiner comes back every few weeks so I decided to go into my drafts and finally finish this one which I started like idk when (also isn’t this aesthetic so cute 🤭)
You just finished tying Reiner with the new ropes you two bought together the other day.
“How do they feel baby? Too tight? Too loose?” You ask waiting for a response.
“Um.. they feel.. fine.” Reiner shys away, blushing at the situation. No matter how excited his is for this, he’ll always feel embarrassed at the way he’s exposed for you.
“You sure you still wanna do this?” You give him another chance to stop right there, and continue like you guys have done in the past. But he insists that he wants this.
“Yes! Yes.. I want to.. with you.” You smile at him, caressing his cheek as he looks up at you with a pleading expression.
“You’re so cute, y’ know that?” You take your hands and run them up and down his abs and back, making him shiver. He throws his head back, whimpering quietly in anticipation of whatever you were planning to do with him.
You gently suck on his pale neck, leaving hickeys all over and pulling more whimpers from him.
“Y-Y/N..” you smile and straddle his lap, gently grinding on his hard cock, still restrained in his boxers.
“A-ah.. you’re so beautiful, an’ make me feel so good.” Reiner showers you in praise, slightly bucking his hips up, creating friction between his cock and your cunt. “N-never had someone love me like this before.. thank you Y/N.” He holds you tight, nuzzling himself into your neck as you grind on each other lovingly.
“You deserve so much more, always a good boy for me.” He whimpers at the praise you give him, your honey-like voice going straight to his dick.
You get up from his lap, leaving him reaching for more as you take off the rest of the clothing separating you from each other. You then release his cock from his restraining boxers, and he winces at the light, airy contact.
You slowly walk around, tracing your finger along Reiner’s jawline, his eyes never leaving your hands. Again, you gently suck on his neck, dragging your fingernails down his chest. He looks up at you, a glint of love, admiration, and neediness in his eyes. You don’t want to wait any longer and neither does he.
“What do you want to do, love?” You ask your sweet husband. You were eager, but tonight you felt the urge to take care of your baby.
“Ah.. I don’t.. I don’t know. Whatever you want to do. I’ll be happy with whatever you choose.” He stammers, waiting for your next action.
“C’mon, Reiner. Nothing.. in mind at all?” Lacing your words with seduction, you slowly lower yourself down below his knees, his eyes following your every move.
You walk your fingers up the inside of his thighs causing him to squirm slightly. A wave of pink flushes his face, and he frantically looks around the room, avoiding the trance of your deep brown eyes.
You continue to walk your fingers up, stopping right before you reach his heavy balls. The sudden halt worries him.
“W-why’d you stop..?” He questions, a puzzled look on his face.
“Words, Reiner. You have to use your words. What do you want me to do for you?” You know exactly what he wants but you’re working on getting Reiner to express his needs on his own, rather than letting you guess what he wants all the time.
“But.. Y/N..” He whines.
“Mm? What’s the problem?” You’re set on pushing him to ask you directly for what he wants and prefers.
“I can’t.. i can’t.. ‘s too embarassing..” he says, hanging his head low.
“Well I can’t either. If you won’t talk I can’t help you.” It almost hurts to be so stern with your sweet husband, but he needs to learn to be more assertive.
“Guess I’ll just sit here.” You sigh, seemingly bored, and begin drawing circles with your finger on his muscled thigh. Through your peripheral vision, you can see him staring at the wall, occasionally glancing at you. It’s obvious he wants to say something but can’t find the words.
“The longer you take the longer it’ll take for you-“ You begin explaining until the sound of his voice interrupts you.
“T-touch.. me.. want you to touch me.. p-please.” Now you’re getting somewhere. You grin like a Cheshire Cat before making your next move.
“I see. Where? Where do you want me to touch you? You question, acting clueless to the obvious answer. His eyebrows furrow, his expression akin to one of a kicked puppy. But you still stick to the agenda, waiting for his response.
“…my d-dick.. please..” he finally spits out, his volume decreasing each syllable that left his mouth. For such a big man he’s awfully timid, and it’s so cute.
“Your wish is my command.” You tease him before softly taking his leaking cock into your hands.
He groans lightly, tipping his head back and closing his eyes. With your free hand, you feel all over his torso, outlining his defined abs with your long nails.
Reiner’s a sensitive man, so you start slow, careful not to apply too much pressure. It’d be a shame if he finished too quickly. You alternate between slow strokes and short quick strokes, keeping his attention in your grasp.
“Hah…a-ah..Y-Y/N..” he whimpers out, his breathing quickening with each stroke of your hand. He strains at the ties, accentuating the way the ropes squeeze at his muscles even more.
“Reiner, baby. You okay?” You ask, still stroking his cock which now has precum dripping down the side.
“Y-yes.. yeah.” He grits his teeth and adjusts himself in his chair.
As you pump his length, you focus on that sweet, sweet underside that always makes shivers run down his spine. The stimulation of the area causes his mouth to fall slightly agape, and his eyebrows to pinch.
“Ngh.. p-lease.. I’m s-sensitive, Y/N.” He squirms slightly, his hips gently bucking into your hand.
“I know baby. Won’t tease you too much, promise.” You assure him, and you can see his clenched jaw ease. You then begin placing kitten licks and kisses on his dick, eliciting more whimpers and cries from him. You lick a long stripe from the bottom to his cute pinkish tip, circling your tongue around it.
“F-fuck..!” He grits his teeth and furrows his eyebrows, looking down, keeping eye contact with you. It’s so adorable when he looks like this, overwhelmed with pleasure.
Finally, you take his entire dick in your mouth, skillfully rotating your tongue around his mushroom tip. His usual quiet demeanor had broken, now he was in your bedroom, moaning shamelessly.
“A-AH! Ngh.. F-fu.. a-ah Y/N!” He cries out, breathing heavily. He ruts his hips up so eagerly, like he doesn’t have any control over his body. You attempt to hold his hips down and stop him from writhing so much, but it’s no use.
“Reiner, baby. I can’t take care of you if you keep moving like this.” You say, holding back a giggle.
“ ‘m s-so- ngh.. sorry. Just f-feels so good.” He says, his breathing slowing as you release him from your mouth.
“Can I..?” You ask, and he nods his head, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down in his throat. Again, you take him in your mouth, this time using your free hand to tease his nipples. Over time, you noticed his nipples were extremely sensitive, so from then onward, you never failed to take advantage of this.
“F-f-fuck! O-oh.. s’ too good.. getting c-close..Y/N…” His movements were become more erratic, a clear indication of his approaching organism. But you keep going, not slowing down, and disregarding his warning.
“Close.. c-close.. p-please I’m s’ close..” he begins whimpering, squeezing his eyes shut. You take him out of your mouth, still jerking him off.
“Not yet, Reiner. Can you hold it for me baby?” You ask him.
“M-mh-ngh.. mhm.. y-yes, I c-can.” His moans quiet down, and it seems he’s now focused on holding his orgasm just a little bit longer for you. So sweet, trying so hard to please you.
“D-don’t know.. if I can.. any.. any l-longer. P-please.. cum?” He pleads with you, his voice breaking. He was so close, so close to release, and he was just waiting on your command.
“Go ahead love. You did so well for me.” As soon as the words leave your mouth, he breaks. His whimpers and moans filling the room as his dick releases continuous spirts of his thick cum.
“A-ah! Fuck! F-fuck Y/N! Ah..!” He tries to move his hips, trying to fuck himself through his high, but the orgasm is too strong. So strong it leaves him twitching slightly, so you help him, continuing to jerk him off.
“Good job, baby. Did so, so good.” You coo, kissing up on his neck and chest. He looks up at you with admiration, wanting so badly to touch you, to feel you.
“Wanna.. feel you.. please.” He pleads with you, and you just can’t say no. You leave another kiss on his lips, and walk around to his front.
You lower yourself down until you’re hovering over him. You take his dick in your hand and rub the tip on your wet folds. He moans lightly at the contact as you take him inside you little by little. Reiner is a big man, so it takes a little time to get used to the size of his cock.
“W-wait, Y/N.. wan’ touch you, can you.. untie?” Reiner chokes out, seeming completely out of breath. You comply, releasing his hands from the binds.
Again, you hover over his dick, this time with his hands helping to guide you. Slowly, you sink down fully, moaning quietly. He throws his head back, moaning, and you haven’t even started moving yet.
After allowing the two of you to get used to the familiar feeling, you begin to bounce up and down slightly.
“Ngh.. y-you.. feel so good.”
“Yeah?” You throw one arm over his shoulder to balance yourself, and lift his chin up towards you with your thumb. His gentle, hazel eyes were glossy and filled with desperation. With every movement of his eyebrows pinched, his pink lips slightly parted. The blonde man’s large hands roamed your body, caressing the curves of your hips and the plushy feeling of your thighs.
“H-hah.. ah f..fuck.” He whimpered in between short, shallow breaths. His hips began to slightly rut his hips up into you, the once gentle feeling becoming more crude. Reiner began to suck and nibble at your neck and with each love bite he placed on your skin, you could feel your orgasm rapidly approaching.
“R-Reiner.. g’na.. g’na c-cum..” you cried out.
“ ‘m close.. s’ close.. Y-Y/N.. i-in..? Can I?” You nod subconsciously, not really paying attention to anything but the contact of his mushroom tip against your gummy walls. Reiner’s grip on your hips tightened, and you could tell you were both desperately chasing your highs. His thrusts quickened, becoming slightly rougher as he pleaded to cum.
“Y/N.. c..umming.. ah..!” He cried out into the room, his eyelids shutting tightly and his mouth falling agape. His thighs twitched with each rope of cum he released, tipping you off the edge.
Your orgasm washed over like a strong wave, and pulsed though you like a continuous current. You wrapped Reiner’s neck, holding on to him tightly.
“L-love you.. Y/N.. s’ much.” He sighed, his chest rising up and down softly.
“Love you too.” The two of you sit there for a minute, basking in the warmth of each other’s body heat before hopping in the tub to take a calming bath together.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫
a/n: y’all I got so lazy at the end forgive me 🙏🏾
#aot x reader#aot smut#aot fanfiction#aot#reiner braun#reiner x reader#aot reiner#snk reiner#reiner smut#attack on titan reiner#reiner x you#fem reader#snk x reader#snk smut#snk fanfiction
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HII IL YOUR OC SO SO MUCH CAN YOU YAP A LIL ABOUT THEM??? (I NEED MORE CONTENT)
ALSO NEW MOOT?? 😭❤️🫶 MAYBE??❤️❤️❤️🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
NEW MOOT, HI OMGGGG YOUR ART IS SO COOL
and YES ABSOLUTELY I can yap about my guys 😭
Yuichi:
- my beloved magicless prefect lol. He’s probably the most normal of my oc’s in the sense that his problems are like, average family problems, but also he went to another world and was basically like “omg I get to start over and never talk to anyone I previously knew ever again!” so maybe not that normal.
- He’s actually got similar problems to Riddle! He doesn’t realize his family being that controlling is abnormal until he meets Riddle, either—so he’s also having a crisis. When the gang is learning about Riddle’s mom and situation he went “yeah but isn’t everyone’s parents like that? haha” to which Ace and Deuce stared at him like “NO??? WHAT???”
- he didn’t have any friends in his old world, mainly because 1) his family kept him so busy with massive expectations, studying and work and 2) he’s very undiagnosed autistic lmao.
- him and Malleus are not shipped together but please know that they have the absolute most romantic friendship possible. It’s 100% platonic. they just say lines to each other that sound like they belong in an otome game with complete platonic sincerity
Arlo:
- probably the oc I post about the most at this point lmaooo 😭 and yet I’ve never spoken about his backstory or problems or anything somehow,,,,
- he falls in love easily. I mean, like, people are nice to him and then he immediately has a crush on them. It’s something he HATES about himself—and it caused him a lot of problems growing up. Every single person he’s ever liked payed ZERO attention to him, in favor of other people (usually his siblings). He’s not playing second best, he’s not even on the scoreboard.
- he used to be really sweet! which was mostly him just trying to get people to like him (and his parents to pay any attention to him). He eventually figured out that being mean to people got attention quicker, and it felt more natural to him (also it’s hard to fall in love with people when they hate you, isn’t it?)
- he fundamentally believes he’s not a very good person, so he would NEVER confess his feelings to Neige.
- his unique magic is called Siren Song! like the name implies, it causes people to fall in love with him and be willing to do anything for him for 24 hours. It’s the type of unique magic he was desperate for as a kid, but now he HATES it. It’s just a reminder to him of how pathetic he was (his words).
Elio:
- he’s so sweet and I love him so much. despite all the grief he’s felt throughout his life he tries his best to be happy and optimistic, and he’s never tried to close himself off from connection.
- despite how easy going he initially seems, he’s VERY pissed at Sebek lol. The guy spoke bad about humans a few too many times around him, might have said something about his family, and now he gives him the Disappointed Upperclassman Stare whenever he enters a room😭
- he’s in the board game club! he likes games a lot, but he also has unnaturally good luck. Azul and Idia lowkey ban him from games of chance sometimes. (Also… Idia occasionally forces Elio to do gacha rolls for him. His luck is just better, and he wants that new character!!)
Ithel:
- his personality is actually pretty dramatic and sarcastic lol, he says funny stuff constantly but under his breath. very studious as well!!! he’s very smart
- when I say he’s experiencing trauma, I MEAN it. like. constant nightmares of dying, panic attacks, etc. the two years when he’s separated from Elio while he’s at school are what push him over the edge. Despite this, he outwardly seems to hold it together pretty well.
- he’s an amazing actor! If he wasn’t as freaked out, he might actually be able to get a role in a movie or something—it would make him happy.
- he teases Epel for being “cute” constantly, just because he knows it bothers him. despite that, they get along fairly well. The type of friendship that roll their eyes behind Vil’s back and then giggle at each other, and then immediately get caught lmao.
#twisted wonderland#disney twst#twst oc#twst original character#arlo wake oc#elio sonne oc#ithel sonne oc#yuichi yuu oc#Sunny’s asks! ☀️
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A succubus and a demon! (The succubi don't have names but the demon is Kronos and the succubus is one of his bosses in Hell and he's not /fond/ of the succubi for many reasons but they all adore picking on him)
Also because I love them and like to point it out, the succubi act more as pleasure dealers in the sense of they offer up whatever a human wants most in exchange for their soul. It's rarely of a sexual nature since it's what they want MOST in life. And most people's ambitions are outside of a bedroom. (happy pride, asexuals are able to get affected by a succubus now without discrimination)
#my characters#did i make succubi in a plot that i could fall victim to as an asexual personally? yeah#kronos is just a petty lil baby with a younger brother who is very nice for a demon#kronos is responsible for being a dick to everyone in the plot and yet has the weirdest morals and its not fine#but hes gonna make that everyone elses problem not his#for instance he originally goes to earth bc a human has somehow just stolen all of the Devils attention and its annoying#why fixate on one human doomed to Hell just let the guy live and die then fixate#so he goes to kill the human but ends up saving the guy and then agonizes because even as a demon#its REALLY tacky to save someone and then kill them#so he doesnt kill him and instead demands to be a roommate until he returns to hell#and then they team up to kill demons and other creatures that seem obsessed with the human#and so they just kinda kill and banish demons back to hell and its fiiiine kronos is just causing problems for Hell#thats not even a new issue hes always doing that !#and then they meet a siren who refuses to talk and kronos is like oh time to be the biggest dick ever#and is like well if she wont talk and she needs a name i vote halibut#as a mean joke bc why would she want to be named after a fish#and she lights up and is SUPER happy and nods and beams and is so happy with her new name#and then the human is like well she needs more clothes than one outfit right#also shes barefoot and its cold i need to buy her shoes idk what tho#and kronos is like here buy her these rainboots and so the guy buys them and is like just wear these#until you can show me what you want bought ok and halibut is in love with her cute lil yellow rainboots#so basically everything kronos does out of spite to the weird mute siren (by choice) backfires#and she adores him and doesnt know hes trying to be mean to her#anyway the succubi collectively like to pick on the really silly and childish demons they outrank#like kronos! so he is constantly a target for them to mock which is why he isnt fond of them which fuels them more#the succubi are just really chill most of the time though ?#and its just. i love my succubi ok theyre wonderful#and that has been another story time in the tags bye
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good GOD can we stop gendering everything. I swear some of y'all just took the futch scale and decided to run with it as gender roles 2.0 (yassified edition)
#like use whatever labels you want for yourself and your communities idc! i love femmes i love butches im happy for you#my issue as always comes when yall start imposing those labels on anyone and everyone unsolicited#and ESPECIALLY when you tear apart other people for not being femme/butch enough#me personally i dislike both those labels because i know i will never be enough for them even if i try#plus i dont see the correlation between how a certain article of clothing or way of wearing my hair makes me more masculine or feminine#for ME that is. like if a skirt/kurti makes you feel more femme thats great. but that doesn't mean it has to universally be feminine#and telling me im femme because i like skirts is just reinforcing a universal gender to a piece of clothing#me personally i can't wear pants cause they're uncomfortable#anyway tangent aside. those “this is the most butch woman twitter can handle” posts were funny at first#but then they devolved into “HAHA twitter thinks girl with long hair is butch they don't know what a real butch is”#which is so annoying. what makes you butch. who gets to decide that#there is a problem when characters who express their butchness a certain way canonically get miscasted with traditionally femme stuff#and i get that butchphobia is very real#but also when that's not the case just let people express themselves man. you don't have to be dragging everyone all the time#liveblogging.pdf
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My FL main went through some really weird, organic development over the...oh god, I think it's been five years since I started playing now.
So my main is named Skadi Larkin. They are a little bastard. They started out extremely 2D; I named them after my favorite Norse goddess and the protagonist of the book I was reading at the time. I originally wanted to make them female like both of their namesakes, but the second I saw the third-gender option, I thought it was too good to pass up. This is where they got their primary base characterization as a mad scientist who wanted to Cause Problems.
Then I started the Nemesis ambition and forgot which option I'd chosen for who I was trying to avenge, so they lost both their lover and their older brother under tragic circumstances (only the lover was killed by Nemesis's antagonist, though).
Then I got an Exceptional Friendship and had to give my tragic backstory in order to gain entry to the House of Chimes. Skadi pulled said tragic backstory (orphaned in a hansom accident) more or less out of their ass, but it did establish that their parents are dead.
Somewhere down the line, I realized that technically Skadi is a linguist, since the Correspondence is a language, and I made that their profession on the Surface as well.
Around this time, I started working on character designs for my fan comic. I got really into messing around with skin tone, and somewhere along the line thought it would be fun to draw Skadi (who was originally white) with darker skin, and it stuck.
Then I abruptly realized I was taking a lot of options that increased my Melancholy, and almost all of them were based on the Surface. So now Skadi has a longing for the Surface.
I left the game for a few years, but somewhere during this stretch of time, and I don't know how this happened, but I decided Skadi was now Native American; specifically, Metis. I changed their design to incorporate a sash woven in a style characteristic of the Metis, which also added a bit of color to their design (which was mostly black or grey at this point).
During this time, I started incorporating Skadi into my fan comic. This would eventually lead me to actually flesh out their backstory in greater detail. When I started playing the game again, I also created my first alt by total accident (long story), and I decided to weave her backstory with Skadi's.
So Skadi is in the interesting position of being an Indigenous person who is what we'd probably consider Two-Spirit today but they'd just call "Bollocks to that gender crap". They never belonged on the Surface, since the Metis are in a bit of a liminal space compared to other tribes due to their interesting background (the Metis are the descendants of French settlers and Indigenous inhabitants, mostly Cree), and Skadi exists in a liminal space within that liminal space due to only being half-Metis and raised primarily in white culture, although they still maintained a connection to it through their late mother. They also never belonged because no one else on the Surface outside of the communities they already felt isolated from would ever accept them for their gender. London gave them a chance to express one of those, but not both, and despite knowing that the Surface hates them just for existing, they still long to return.
#fallen london#fallen london oc#mild fallen london spoilers ig#there's a really interesting dichotomy with all of my fl characters honestly#skadi's is just probably the most blatant#umbra belacqua (my shadowy alt) is someone who both loves very fiercely and is capable of immense cruelty at the same time#in her backstory she had the husband of her ex-fiancee (who left her at the altar) murdered because she couldn't let go of her ex's betraya#said ex is my persuasive alt and is both very socially gregarious and extremely withdrawn#he probably won't ever get a spouse just because he can't bring himself to love someone else after what happened the last time#and he had very good reason for leaving umbra because he could never love her the way she wanted#and he felt that the sympathy she would receive from his family would more than make up for the heartbreak#since umbra is obsessed with gaining power and prestige and he came from an influential family#and knew that running away with the person he really loved would get him disowned#(he doesn't know umbra killed his husband btw)#my dangerous alt is my persuasive alt's sister#she's trans and badly overcompensating for it by refusing to wear anything except feminine clothing#because it hasn't quite gotten through to her yet that no one in Fallen London particularly cares about her gender expression#and she feels like the only way she can be seriously considered a woman is if she does everything she can to look like one#which causes her a good few problems because her one true passion is violence and that's not usually considered a very feminine hobby#then their younger brother (my watchful alt) is someone ironically very disinclined to violence who resorts to it anyways#the only people he's actually going to try to kill are the ones he has to kill for his ambition#and he's not very happy about it but he doesn't have much of a choice#because while he might not like bloodshed his murdered spouse was an anarchist who definitely did#and he's determined to do right by his memory by...killing a lot of people apparently#he is not a terribly mentally stable man and when i finally get around to making his account#he's going to have a massive nightmares problem that he refuses to deal with and keeps ending up in the royal beth for it#tl;dr all my fallen london characters are going through it and have overly long and complicated backstories#my main just happens to have the most overly long and complicated of them all
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#it sure is difficult to make plans with my parents when both of them are in a habit of lying or withholding info to make people feel better#actually it's NOT helpful to book someone a different flight time than thay wanted because you think they'll be happier with a different one#and not tell them?#also not helpful to not tell me someone is coming and not tell them I don't know?#also not helpful to not say what you want and then try to force that to occur? particularly without knowledge of the logistics involved?#like if you tell me what you want and when you want to do it that's good. actively good.#“i didn't want to just put my foot down and say I want to (x)” actually saying you want to (x) would cause me to know that you want it.#which is useful.#instead of booking things before telling me to force the issue? that is definitely putting your foot down concretely?#BOTH of them.#they are flying out to visit and neither of them actually told/asked/confirmed me before booking tickets.#and they don't even have the same info as each other. because ????#also at least one of them is lying about when the tickets were actually purchased#blease#please. confer with me before booking flights to a city i do not live in to force plans to occur how you want????#or like inviting my semi estranged father without telling me?#'i just wanted us to all get along as a family and be happy and enjoy our time together' cool that was not how you achieve that end#blehhhhhhhh#you could also check whether I requested time off work! that would be good to do before booking flights#this is not the worst problem to have in the world. but i lost a lot of work and sleep to it last week and I'm still#getting blindsided by new updates
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Honestly sooooooo fucked up that I thought my overwhelming daily fatigue and debilitating body pain was a product of the awful working conditions I was under for years and years... and yet, despite being out of work for half a year now, I'm still so fatigued and in pain all the time??? Like come on man that's not fair
Oh well maybe I have liver disease and they'll treat it and then I am magically so much more energized like I was as a kid. We can only hope !!!!
#speculation nation#negative/#um. not hoping i have liver disease but the blood tests blatantly state that it's not working entirely right.#not like major enough to be an immediate health emergency. or else my doctor probably wouldve called me#rather than referring me to radiology.#im just hoping that it's something easy to treat. it really would be so nice for my problems to be fixed like that.#and im mentioning it in conjunction with the fatigue just bc it can cause fatigue. ya kno.#probably is a good thing i caught it this early whatever it is.#like maybe it's Not fibromyalgia. but the fact that i pursued diagnosis for fibromyalgia spurred the blood tests#which alerted my doctor to the abnormal liver enyzmes.#if i hadnt pursued diagnosis who knows how much longer this wouldve gone on like this...#so! im still not happy to be doing a Fucking ultrasound for my liver. but. if it means catching whatever this is early#then like. it'll be worth it. doubly so if it does end up fixing my fatigue problems.#or even just some of them. i dont even need to be at 100% of what others can do#i just wanna be able to do half an hour of chores without feeling like im going to collapse 😭😭😭😭#it's really very troublesome. my life would be so much easier if i had the energy to do more than one thing per day.#(and if i do more than one thing i end up nearly bedridden the rest of the day. like today lol.)#im just trying to look on the bright sides so i dont start freaking out again about my liver not working right.#ultimately. even if i dont feel amazing. i dont feel all that different from how ive lived the past decade of my life.#or at least the most recent years. i kind of feel like my chronic pain has gotten worse. maybe fatigue too.#though i do know ive been dealing with both for however long. idk. might be recency bias. who knows.#ANYWAYS. im not actively dying. so i'll live to my appointments. and then i will hope it's smooth sailing from there.#(oh god i hope i wont need surgery. i dont want surgery. please im trying to graduate college i do not want surgery)#(god why is my luck always so bad)
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video games....
#mine#i love my steam deck sooooooooo much im so happy i can actually play games again like a big proper library of them#and everything#everything on steam AND emulators is available to me. do you know how many games that is!#i started a new beegee3 playthrough on the HARDEST DIFFICULTY (!) today. which is also a single-save difficulty#and im in one of the most difficult parts of the game right now (level 4) and kind of nervous lol#but at the same time im really proud of myself for learning the game to the point i feel comfortable challenging myself in it#and im happy i get to at all :D i love you video games#and sooner or later ill come back to stardew valley cause there was that big update and i have some games on my wishlist too#and its not verified yet but i might play that pomeranian making the house dirty game cause it looked cute#oh and yakuza also because my friend got two of the yakuzas for me#YAYYYYY GAMES#also kind of sad though because tomorrow i pack and sunday i go back for babys last quarter of college#and im worried about how busy its going to be with classes and job apps and then of course actually graduating#and moving out and haivng a job and stuff#when all i want is to enjoy being able to play video games again.... sig#sigh*#WHATEVER...future mes problem#oh i almost forgot...one of the best parts of the deck imo is the versatility because with games like beegee3#you can play it in controller mode which has its pros and cons but you can also swap to computer mode#which also has its pros and cons so like. i can adjust as needed#when im just exploring or trying to loot an area etc i go controller#but when im in combat i go computer because the hotbar is REALLY helpful for decision making#its really nice to have the option to choose since no console players have that it seems#and the only pc players who can do that are the ones who have and are willing to connect controllers#and most of them dont seem to be into that#but im really glad to be able to do both#ok done yapping now
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#vent post essay ahead lol#having complexes about talking about your emotions is literally the fucking devil . its miserable. it sucks so bad.#the aamount of damage that is caused to someone by like#i mean im talking abou t me here obviously.#being the person whose like. overall ultimately tends not to feel horrible as often is like.#it's nice not feeling bad emotionally all the time but also it's like. i develop this complex about being like able to help.#i don't feel bad anywhere near as often as my friends so i can help them out and listen to them vent i can have the mental room to#like listen to them talk about their problems. yeah. but it makes me feel like. well this is my job now so i shouldn't fucking talk about m#i shouldnt vent when i feel bad because that's not what i'm known for. plus my friends already all feel worse than me more often than me. s#i don't want to dump any more on their plate than they have to deal with. i don't want to burden them anymore than i have to. and like it's#it's hard. i hate fucking talking about it and it's made so much worse when its like people i love . always been a fucking problem becaus#i just feel fucking horrible admitting that i feel bad i hate that so much. i don't want to like turn away people who care about me but li#i feel like if i tell them what's wrong with me i'll like do it anyways. i feel like i come off as super normal and happy go lucky and like#ostensibly fine. so when i admit this shit its like. oops the facade is cracking!!!!!! uh oh uh oh you can't help people so you feel bad!!!#because your fucking npd has made you feel self centered in a way that means you want to help people or some shit i dont fucking know#and so when i feel bad or get mad over something unreasonable it's like. well i hope i fucking keel over and die or something i dont like .#i don't want people seeing me like this or whatever. and my stupid fucking personality disorder just ruins every god damn thing its so bad.#my past experiences giving me complexes that lead to me feeling fucking left out over like small stupid stuff but god the worst part is lik#my brain categorizing something as being ''My Thing'' so somebody else talks about liking my thing AFTER my brain has designated it mine#makes alarm bells go off and feel like theyre fucking. i don't know encroaaching on my turf or what the fuck ever? it SUCKS ASS#it makes me feel HORRIBLE . and it's like i'm not gonna fucking bring it up because i don't wnt to be like a dick but also it's like well.#i feel fucking miserable about this but it's just like mean and unnecessary and cruel to like stifle people's fucking fun because of my dum#fuckin complexes. it's fucking constant. like oh look at you girl you feel fucking left out because you never get characters who really gri#you mentally and so now you have one but oops! someone else talked about them and now you're seeing red! you like this person though#so you're gonna feel fucking MISERABLE about this . you're gonna feel HORRIBLE because of this. and there's nothing you can fucking do#and it controls my goddamn life and i HATE IT i fucking HATE IT i wish i knew how to fix it. ghghrgurghrughruhg i want to fucking explode#and then you feel bad about feeling bad because you are fucking sisyphus. you're sisyphus. and your own anger is your boulder. you ingrate.#i hate this. i just wanted to have a good day.#jane mary cry one tear
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god do not trust queers who hate gay men
#i don't want to get into it but i just had a flashback to a terrible group of friends lol#anyway if they don't already hate you they will find an excuse to hate you too#rum.txt#also just remembered that one of them was my trans boyfriend's ex and they had a Huge problem with him being a man#they would only use they/them and use an older (gender-neutral) nickname#i actually don't remember if i ever interacted with them? i feel like i would have fought them#but i remember my friends being like 'yeah we know [REAL NAME] HE is our friend's BOYFRIEND'#and they just... didn't stop.#yeah 'cause that's not transphobic at all 🙄#anyway.#so happy not being in college anymore
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Bestie I hope you're doing alright <333 I just need to let you know that i love the emperor obi wan fic?? I marriage oh god i mourn for them both, both had such different expectations but why don't they just COMMUNICATE oh god they're idiots your honour And oh the different ways in which they pray and the braids!!
In some ways, Obi-Wan is asking an entirely different question now.
“Would you like to spar?” he says.
Would you stand by me? he means. When I’m wrong, will you correct me and force me to try again?
Will you stay?
And Anakin says yes.
i love this scene and the words and the way you show us them getting over their differences <3 and the plot over the poison!! i was expecting it to go like in the movie, you know, that anakin cooks the meal but komari humiliates him by asking him to take the first bite but ths is just!!! so perfect!!! will we see obi going undercover into the kingdom? i can't wait to see how you've planned it all out bestie i already love all your writing 💜💜💜
Ahhh thank you!! This fic is such a pain in the ass (affectionate), it's really a labor of love.
We all know Obi-Wan and Anakin are incapable of communicating on the first try (or even the twentieth try). They had to do a whole lot of work to undo first impressions and then find their way from there. But one of the biggest problems is that they won't even admit what they want out of it!!
Obi-Wan is out here going "Please love me, please love me" but he REFUSES to say that aloud because he's too afraid to hear a refusal. In his mind, nothing is making sense anyway, because (spoiler alert) Tatooine was the one who asked for the marriage. He really thought that Anakin WANTED to marry him, and he feels like he's being jerked around when Anakin's behavior seems to show that he never did.
I think there's definitely a bitter, self-hating sort of sentiment here where Obi-Wan is thinking that he's somehow unloveable. So in this scene with the spar, he's thinking "Will you stay?" because he's willing to settle for being coworkers and being friends, even if it means he'll never have a loving marriage. (And it's such a relief that Anakin says yes to even that. Like, progress in SPADES)
They're slowly sort of figuring out their emotions and trying to reconcile their cultural differences at the same time. I'm hoping the next arc (after the poison thing) will be very hindi-love-song-esque (ie: if ch 6-8 was jashn-e-bahaara, Tatooine arc will be in lamhon ke daaman mein ((sex included))
Glad I can still surprise you even though you clearly know the movie well!! I remember rewatching it before starting this fic and going "Wow what do you mean no one has made this extremely specific crossover as a fic already?" Like to me it was so vividly clear that Komari was Maham Anga and Xanatos was Adham Khan but somewhere along the way I threw out Sujamal's plotline and added more siblings and omegaverse and a whole bunch of Force philosophy and it became its whole own beast!
Obi-Wan's definitely going to get a chance to explore Tatooine (mostly at Anakin's side, but not always) because I want him to get some direct insight on Anakin's culture and traditions. I have yet to decide how much anonymity he has, but I feel like the people of Tatooine are pretty chill about royalty. Also they'll get to go to a temple, which I'm pretty excited about!!
#post ch 11 the boys are gonna be having a (mostly) good vacation in Tatooine#it's a bit ''aisa desh hai mera'' of them#obikin#emperor obi-wan au#I know I caused all the problems but I just want them to be happy again#literally thank you so much for your essay of an ask#I've been stupid busy with college so it's nice to think of my boys#imjusttoofunky
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