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coralinnii · 2 years ago

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Hi, I saw your requests were open could you do a sequel for Malleus and Idia villainess? And if it’s not too much work could you do for Rook and Lilia?

being reincarnated into a new world as the bad guy feat: Lilia, Rook genre: drama note: set in the same universe as previous works (Malleus and Vil’s ver specifically), prominent non-canon characters (Yung, etc), not gender-specific reader, no pronouns used, sculptor!reader in Rook’s portion,

You remembered that the dating sim game you found yourself in was at most PG13 but oh, how you wanted to swear in your native language and the language in this madness of a new world you were currently in.

Couldn’t you be a rich but nameless aristocrat or even a dumb mob character? Why did you have to be the hopeless puppet of your evil parents who just purchased a dragon egg from a black auction?!

At the persuasion of your “parents” (they certainly don’t act like it), your character went to buy a dragon egg, hoping to raise it to overthrow one of the love targets and become the new Dragon King. All for the slim chance your family would be proud of you. You knew the unfair ending to your person that was offered as a sole perpetrator of this act of treason. Your life was written unfortunately as such, short and unloved.

But you weren't their child anymore. You chose to rebel this horrid destiny by running away with the dragon egg in your arms. You weren’t sure how to get the egg back to its people but you weren’t going to let your family get their hands on it.

You were adamant of your choice of action. You were going to find a way to reunite the young dragon to its family. Easy, right?

No. No it was not. Especially when the moment a small cute boy hatched from that egg, you were running around your secret cabin trying to reign in the surprisingly powerful child.

“Love, please get off the ceiling. Slowly float your way to me-ahh the curtains! Get water!”

Realising you were way over your head, you were racking your brain to figure out the best solution. Aside from just your inexperience with children, it’s plain to see that the youngster in your care is developing skills you couldn’t possibly know to support.

You had no choice but to find him

“This is certainly an odd predicament here”

Lilia casually commented as he curiously observed the unplanned visitors in his manor. Lilia’s eyebrow quirk upwards as he watches the young dragon fae playfully squirming in your lap as you nervously nurse the tea Lilia’s servants prepared in haste.

“I understand you must have questions. I can explain everyth-“ you started to speak but you were cut off by the Duke.

“May I take a guess first?”

For someone who is smiling, Lilia still manages to instill a sense of fear in you to the point that you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything but nod your head.

“I’m aware of your family’s…avarice for power and their disdain for Lord Malleus since their lost in standing” your breath hitched when you accidentally locked eyes with Lilia’s darkened scarlet gaze “Young dragons are rare but their strength can change the world’s power dynamic when raised into adulthood”

Lilia’s words were vague but his tone was pushing a dangerous weight onto you. With a few sentences, he already knew your family’s plans for treason and you were being carefully judged by his watchful gaze.

“Which is why dragon eggs are extremely difficult to obtain, and considered illegal to own or sell to non-fae if one were to find ways to find one.” Lilia continued. “Coming to me with a young dragon fae is sort of a confession of your crime, you understand that?”

Of course you did. It was why you didn’t want to get involved with Lilia or anyone in the first place. You were a criminal the moment you obtained the egg and you were being used as a pawn in your parents’ greed for power. You initially wanted to leave the egg deep in the woods and run away from your family.

But before you could, Yung was born. And you instantly fell in love. The tiny child crawled into your arms and into your heart. You decided to risk imprisonment if it means the innocent fae grows up happy and strong, with the love your host body never received.

Shaking away your nerves, you stared straight into Lilia’s scarlet eyes which surprised him. “I know the risks, but only you can save this child from my family's greed.”

You, albeit awkwardly with the young fae in your lap, bowed to the powerful duke as you made a bold and desperate plea.

“I beg of you. Please take this child into your care”

Unbeknownst to you, Lilia wasn’t distrusting of you at all. While he disliked your family, he pitied you as he could see only a lonely human that begged for love. He heard news of your disappearance but to think you would appear before him with a tiny fae with great potential. He deduced that your family planned to raise the child to usurp the throne from his young lord but you rebelled and ran with the innocent child.

He silently praised you for your bravery, which led him to his next words.

“Very well, I accept your request”

You lifted your head in shock at the quick reply. You’ve heard that the young(?) Duke was laid-back to a certain degree but you’d assume he put more thought when taking in a whole new ward into his care. But you weren’t going to complain about his benevolence so you fervently thanked him.

Lilia reached his arms out, glancing towards Yung in your arms and you took the hint. He needed to take the young dragon from you if he was going to raise him. You knew that, it was obvious. But that knowledge didn’t help the painful throb in your chest.

Perhaps because he was still quite young, Yung was sensitive to your aching heartbeat as he squirmed anxiously in your grasp, tightening his grip on your shirt and started to cry out for you.

“W-wuv, wuv!” He cried out his nickname for you, something he picked up after hearing you call him Love over and over again. You couldn’t risk the possibility of him attaching to you so you avoided parental titles but alas it didn’t stop anything. He was calling for you with that endearing name.

“Oh, love” you whispered painfully, reaching to the young fae’s tiny hands with your own shaking hands. “You need to let go. I can’t stay with you anymore”

But you couldn’t calm the young one down. You couldn’t even stop your own emotions as you felt the sting in your eyes from the tears that were cascading down your cheeks. You stayed with Yung day and night as you did your best to raise him. You got to see his first crawl, his first stand, his first flight, and so much more. You had dreams where you watched the young dragon grow up with love and you forgot that you weren’t meant to be a part of that. For Yung to be happy, he should be far away from your family, including you. Your mind understands that, why can’t your heart?

You impressed yourself that you managed to register a sudden warmth atop of your hands in your chaotic mess of a mind. You felt Lilia’s hands encase your trembling ones that were wrapped around Yung’s. You locked eyes with the duke’s which you felt your heart skipped a beat at the beauty of his orbs. The entire conversation, you felt his gaze to be intimidating but now it’s slightly different. It was…gentler.

“Oh dear, I supposed there is nothing else we can do” Lilia let out a sigh as he raised to his feet. He gestured for a servant’s attention and announced, “Prepare two rooms for our guests”

“Sir Lilia…” you uttered in confusion but Lilia responded with a playful smile on his pale lips.

“You’ll be staying with me for a while” He smiled with a slight mischievous glint in his eyes

That was how you, a criminal, started living with the great Duke Lilia Vanrouge along with the baby dragon you ran away with.

If you had an unfair life before, the universe must have been dying to prove you wrong by showing that your life could be more unfair. You reincarnated as the story’s most unluckiest character. You were the desperate and foolish noble that fell for Rook Hunt, respected knight and fanatic of beauty in all its form. Stupidly falling for Rook’s flowery words of appreciation, your character begged to be engaged to the knight but grew jealous every time Rook decided to focus his adoration elsewhere, which was every single time.

Blinded by jealousy, your character recklessly attacked Neige and his love interest which ultimately led to imprisonment and presumably death since you never appeared in the story after that.

You thought it was simple to avoid that ending, just annul your engagement and that’s it. However, apparently the original script failed to mention that your family received a large sum of money to arrange the engagement. And there’s no way your family was gonna give the dowry back.

Welp, guess you gotta pay this yourself then.

You proposed a deal with Rook and his family. You would find a way to earn the money that his family spent on you and the engagement will be annulled which certainly shocked the Hunt household since you were so desperate for the union between you and their son in the first place. But they ultimately give the final word to Rook, who was strangely calm.

You were nervous under his gaze but by some miracle, Rook agreed to your deal and you sighed a breath of relief. Now, you just need to figure out how to make money

Coincidentally, like Rook you were also an admirer of all things beautiful but fortunately for others, your method of appreciation is capturing beauty through art, specifically sculpting. You love being able to immortalize one’s visual beauty with your own hands and you were confident that you could make some money out of it.

It started with smaller requests, desk decors of fake flowers and animal sculptures. Soon, your talents were spreading as you were receiving commissions to make busts of loved ones. They were appreciative of your ability to bring out life from inanimate mediums.

But that was partially due to Rook as well.

While he was careful not to overtake your process, Rook’s keen eyes were helpful in the smaller details that made all the differences. He tells you how your client’s face crinkles slightly or how the dimple dips into their cheek when they smile. You suppose you couldn’t blame your original body to love Rook, not completely anyway.

But you refused to make the same mistake. You were determined to change your predestined fate. Afterall, you were a completely different person.

And someone else noticed that as well.

He’s not trying to brag but Rook Hunt was not a typical man. There’s not a single misplaced hair that he wouldn’t notice or a thread misaligned that he wouldn’t catch. So obviously, he noticed the drastic change in you.

Your walking pace is different, your breathing has changed, your typical habits were replaced with new ones.You were more level-headed than usual, determined as always but your goal has changed. It was as though you woke up as a completely different person.

He noticed everything about you but did not mention a word to you, preferring to continue his observation without your knowledge. And through his observations, he’s picked out aspects of you that he can’t seem to look away from.

Firstly, your eyes. While he objectively admired the pure infatuation of your old gaze at him and he was intrigued by the frequent crazed glare of jealousy, Rook finds himself captivated by the new look in your eyes. Your eyes stay the same but they’re clearer, more confident with professional focus when you carve or mold your work. Your eyes seem calmer as you converse with him on occasion, gone was the obsessive looks he once received.

Next, your hands. Since you started sculpting, he began obsessively watching you work, entranced by your practiced strokes and cuts. Your hands glide skillfully against the material as you shape your medium to your whim with confidence. He voiced his envy towards your sculptures for having your hands grace its surface (you chose to ignore that). Your movements differ so much from your old self that Rook started to doubt your identity.

Finally, your lips. You haven't changed your morning routine with the servants so your facial features haven't changed in that sense. However, your smile held his heart in a vice grip, his gaze trapped by your lips like a bramble of thorns digging into his thoughts. He found beauty of all forms to be equally exquisite, and he was not lying to you when he sang praises about your lovestruck grin that showcased the maddening effects of love. But why did that smile seem dull in comparison when he watched the small satisfied smiles formed on your face whenever you were proud of a new project or the shy upward quirk of your lips when your client gave you their words of appreciation for your hard work?

Since your change, Rook grew more and more fascinated by you. He waits to see a new side of you or even glimpses of you he has already seen, just wanting to see you that day. But when he does see you and you offer a polite smile and a wave, his mind turns blank with nothing but you for a second which for a knight and hunter such as himself is frighteningly concerning.

You were dangerous for him, but he likes it

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #disney twst #twst x reader #twisted wonderland imagines #twst scenarios #twst imagines #lilia vanrouge #lilia x yuu #rook hunt #rook x reader #villainess au

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thydungeongal · 2 months ago

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It is known that your favorite edition of D&D is B/X, but setting that one and its Basic ilk aside, what is something in each "mainline" edition that you think makes that one shine bright, something it does great like none of the others? Mainline here meaning the original, both AD&Ds, and the three WotC editions (counting 3rd as one edition).

There's a lot to love about each edition of D&D, yeah!

The original game, or 0D&D as a lot of people call it, is truly a weird little mess of rules that regardless laid the groundwork for a lot of things to come, but I think it should be seen as more than just a weird prototype of better things to come. It is ultimately the predecessor to both Basic and Advanced and while those games are very different in terms of play, looking at 0D&D it's easy to see where both games got their ideas and how they decided to iterate on them. But at the end of the day 0D&D still stands apart from the others in the sense that it was an exciting new frontier of play and as such the game's text is also very open to wild adventures. The game openly promotes the idea of adding robots and aliens into the list of monsters, because why not, there's no clear shape of what D&D as a game and genre even looks like yet, so why not let it be whatever you want? It also has lots of procedures in place for creating extremely cool emergent interactions which no other edition since has done! Like, orcs can be encountered with huge caravans of gold! Sometimes orcs are lead by a dragon or a Balrog or an ogre! It's weird and fun!

AD&D 1e is ultimately an evolution of 0D&D, and in many ways it's like 0D&D + its supplements + a bunch of neat tricks learned on the way. Ultimately what sets AD&D 1e apart from the other editions for me is the absolute wealth of procedures in the DMG for helping the DM create and run a world that feels like a living, breathing place! And there's so much guidance for how to start a campaign with small beginnings and then let it expand in scope!

AD&D 2e is actually my second favorite TSR edition in terms of rules text. There's a lot to be said about AD&D 2e being a clear step away from the original playstyle of the Dungeon Game, and it's most apparent in the way the game got rid of procedures for creating your own dungeons and stocking them with treasures, but the actual rules for playing and running the game are probably the clearest AD&D has ever been. I also feel 2e was the era when the greater shape of D&D as the game we know it as today started to form: while a lot of the stuff that we associate D&D with has been there since the beginning, I feel AD&D 2e is when things finally start to take on their ultimate D&Dness, if that makes sense?

D&D 3e I'm extremely fond of because it was actually my first edition of D&D, but beyond that, taken on its own terms, D&D 3e is unparalleled among the D&Ds in terms of how systemic its rules are. D&D 3e was kind of a mess when it came to the quality of its rules and what sorts of outcomes they produced, but I still love the dang thing because the underlying philosophy is extremely ambitious and cool! AD&D 1e is the edition with procedures to help the DM generate the world; AD&D 2e has lots of really cool rules and procedures that almost make the game run itself; D&D 3e has a physics engine that could make the act of play almost feel like an immersive sim! I understand why very few games have attempted to replicate that systemic design of D&D 3e, but I think there's a lot of cool stuff there.

D&D 4e is the most fun the combat minigame of D&D has ever been and it has unironically the coolest worldbuilding of all editions of D&D. I feel we've talked enough about how D&D 4e is actually extremely cool and for attractive people who like tactical combat, so let's focus on the worldbuilding: D&D 4e mixed up the cosmology of D&D in a way that made it feel like something from mythology instead of a neatly laid out world model. Being a B/X fan I of course love it when the implicit cosmic struggle is one of order versus chaos, and D&D 4e pretty much brought that back! All the major conflicts of D&D 4e's cosmology hinge on the conflict between order and chaos, and it actually adds nuance to what could otherwise be an extremely black and white cosmic struggle. The D&D 4e cosmology is messy and mythic and feels like it works on fantasy logic instead of the weird mystic science that ultimately powers the D&D cosmology of other editions.

And finally, D&D 5e. While I am a vocal 5e hater it has less to do with the game itself and more to do with its suffocating effect on the hobby, because as a game it's got a lot of cool design in places. Concentration is a really elegant fix to the game plan of just stacking all your buffs before combat and then wading in. Advantage/Disadvantage does away with the minutiae of adding together a bunch of different bonuses from various sources and does it in a way that is both mathematically satisfying but also really fun in play! Rolling more dice is fun!!! The way critical hits are handled, via just doubling the number of dice rolled and keeping the modifier the same, is great, because you get the "rolling more dice is fun" factor without the doubling of modifiers that had the potential to cause slowdown in D&D 3e. I like the addition of background as a character creation axis alongside class and species!

#thydungeongal answers

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miumura · 2 years ago

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love hurts. — sim jaeyun oneshot

“its a shame that i like you but you don’t.”

synopsis : you falling in love with your best friend was not only hurting you, but also ruining your relationship with him.

pairing : friend!jake x reader

genre : angst

WORD COUNT : 2K.

love is complicated. falling in love with someone is such a scary thought for you. yet here you are—heads over heels over some guy.

how did it start? how did you end up falling in love with your own best friend?

sim jaeyun, your best friend of 4 years, is a charming guy. Everything about him seemed perfect. his smile, his jokes, his accent—you loved everything. your goal of trying not to like him failed. usually, people who try hard to go for who they like right? but you couldn’t. someone was just in your way of doing so.

“ynnn?” jake's voice woke you up from your nap. he stared at you and gave a huge grin. you would’ve probably yelled at him for waking you up but he looked pretty. you examined his facial features. how can someone be this beautiful? there's was something about his eyes. his eyes is are so pretty—it was enough to lure you in. also his new hair color? gosh that black hair dye must have changed him.

“yn stop staring at me will you? do i have something on my face or—?” jake chuckled.

“ah sorry. i must have stared at you for a while.”

“no need to apologize, i know im good looking.”

“stop being so full of yourself jakey.”

You and Jake are incredibly close. you guys always did things together. You want to go to an amusement park? he's there with you. you want to go out and eat? he's already booking a reservation at a diner. wanna go shopping? jakes your personal bag carrier for the day. not only that, you loved taking pictures. you always carried a camera around and suddenly he was like your model. He would always take pictures of him. you loved going back through the pictures you took with him.

While lately he hasn't been able to do these activities with you, he always makes an effort to call or message you.

You really missed having him around. You could never reach him, like if he were some sort of celebrity or something. you texted him earlier, asking if he wanted to hang out.

but his message left a frown on your face.

“sorry yn i planned on hanging out with someone else :( next time?”

you sighed knowing there will be no next time. at some point, you got used to it. you were just going to stargaze and take pictures by yourself.

you reached the place where you and jake would always go to look at the stars. jake loved stargazing and so did you. you remembered the first time you guys went together.

“woah these stars are pretty”

“just like you”

“oh stop it jake.” you pushed jake playfully. when he said that you swore your heart was going crazy.

“okay but i mean it” jake said while he chuckled.

that memory never failed to make you giggle uncontrollably.

there were quite a lot of people at the location you’re at. it wasn’t shocking that many people were at your favorite spot. as you were scrolling through your instagram feed, you heard a familiar voice. you weren’t going insane right?

as you turned around, there he was. holding hands with a girl.

you didn’t know how to feel. your crush being with another girl? at your favorite spot?

He told the girl, "I love you.” She responded back with a smile. You weren't sure why that hurt. Shouldn't you be delighted with his relationship? Why were you feeling so sad? Why did you want him to tell you, "I love you" instead?

Why didn't he tell you earlier? Why did you have to learn something in this way? It hurts to witness your crush with someone else. Knowing you could never be with him broke your heart.

your favorite spot soon became your worst nightmare. it became the place where you discovered Jake loved another person.

For a few weeks, you ignored Jake. You felt sad after receiving all those texts and seeing those calls from him. It was just so sudden. How could you confront him once you knew? He didn't love you, but you did.

Everything had lost its fun. You couldn't even be bothered to eat something. If only you didn’t go that day, maybe you would be facetiming Jake right now. You were too busy to even try to get in touch with your friends. You felt your world falling apart. It was ridiculous, you were well aware. How could you behave in such a way toward somebody?

He wasn't just a somebody, though. He was someone you were close to for your entire life. He had such a wonderful attitude and was constantly kind. Even though you missed him, you knew that spending time with him would only make things worse. Hanging out with him will only make you deal with a bigger pain.

You were so preoccupied with your thoughts that you failed to notice Jake was directly looking at you. You jumped when he lightly touched your shoulder. You two made eye contact, and his worried expression was clear.

When you got up to get away from him, he grabbed your wrist.

“yn i don't get it. we used to talk so much, what happened? why are you running away from your problems?” jake said “are we really not going to talk anymore?”

you were hesitant to reply. you were so close to just telling him about your feelings. you were going to say something until he interrupted you.

“yn do you not want to be friends anymore?”

you stared at him. that sentence could be interpreted in so many ways but you knew what he meant.

“yn if you don't say something right now im seriously going to cut ties with you.” jake said with a serious tone. he was not joking.

“jake. how can i say this to you?” you said as you felt tears forming. “what do you mean yn?”

“how can i tell you i like you when you're in a relationship?” you said loudly. Tears were starting to fall. Even if you despised crying, here you are confessing to your best friend with tears running down your face.

“what..?” jake stared at you in shock.

“i like you. its been a while actually. i guess people weren’t wrong—eventually someone in the friendship would end up falling in love with the other. Unfortunately, it turned out to me, someone who is hopelessly in love with her best friend.” you stared at jake. you could tell he was still trying to process what you said.

“I ended being heads over heels over some guy who ended up being in a relationship. shocking isn't it? i never expected it either.”

“yn how did you know i was in a relationship? i never told—“

“Yeah, you never did. I thought we were best friends? Why did you hide your relationship form me? Maybe if you had told me sooner, it wouldn't have been so hard for me to move on from you. I had to find out that you were in our favorite place with someone else.” You struggled to hold in your tears. you saw Jake baffled, not knowing what to do with your confession.

“yn i dont even know what to say. i never you felt this way. im so sorry—“

“jake did you know how much it hurt me to see you with her? I was able to realize that I would never touch your hand, kiss you, embrace you, or say "I love you" to you after seeing her. it's a shame how i like you yet you don’t. you stole my heart and managed to break it into pieces.”

your breathing started becoming shaky. you couldn’t believe you were saying all of this. you knew he couldn’t do anything about your feelings. you knew he was deeply in love.

“Jake, I'm sorry. it was never my intention to make you feel guilty. I want you to be happy. it just hurts seeing someone you like in a relationship you know? it just allowed me to realize that i will never be the girl by your side. I truly wish for you to be happy. I'm glad you found someone who can make you smile like that.” The sobbing would not end. You kept wiping away your tears. It was pathetic to allow Jake to see you in this way.

“I'm truly sorry. Jake, I honestly wish I could continue being friends with you but I think it would just hurt me even more. I'm glad someone can finally be there to take care of you when I can't. Jake, I love you and I will miss you. I will never forget you, always remember that. After all, I was your friend for four years.” you smiled bitterly.

“yn wait shouldn't we talk it out? I mean I can't just let you go like that? you were my best friend for four fucking years. and we can still continue to be friends. please yn. stay.”

“I'm trying my hardest jake. I don't think it can work. I want to stay with you but I just can't. things would just become so awkward between us. a part of me wants to stay but another wants me to go. Please don't make me regret leaving.”

“yn please.” You could see Jake about to cry. you swear you were about to break down. You hated seeing Jake cry. and he was crying over you.

“jake please dont cry. especially over someone like me. you already have the perfect girl with you. she seems very sweet—shes totally your type. jake, please take care of yourself. promise me that you will continue to stay healthy, okay?” you tried to move away yet the grasp he had on your wrist was getting tighter.

“Jake let me go.”

“i cant. you're so special to me, you can't just leave because im with someone now. why can't you understand how i feel about this?”

“Jake, like I've said before, do you not realize me staying with you will only hurt me more? Do you expect me to lose feelings for you that easily? i fucking loved you for three whole years. I was scared of confessing, I admit that. but you know what? I asked you to hang out with me so I could tell you my feelings. I had hope because maybe you might have felt the same way. I spent that whole day practicing what I should say to you without messing up. you don't know the feeling of having your heart broken do you? you finally have someone you like to be with, yet I don’t. Someone beat me on getting you.”

you were losing it. Trying to leave Jake was not easy at all. after all you guys have spent four years together. Who would have thought you would try to end the friendship because the other is seeing someone? Even though you hated yourself for wanting to end your friendship with Jake, it was for the best.

Despite the fact that you will never be able to do this again, you gave him a hug. All you could say was “I'm sorry.” You could smell the cologne he was wearing—the same one you had given him a year earlier. “you still kept it?” you sighed.

“How could I not?”

“you're making this harder for me to leave you.”

“then stay.”

“can’t stay if I still have feelings for you. I don't wanna ruin your relationship with her. if i stop having feelings, i'll come back i promise.”

“okay.”

“bye jakey.”

“…bye”

you said your final goodbyes. you couldn’t help but feel sad. you didn’t want to leave, but the sake of your heart you chose to do so. you were leaving your first love. Nothing more.

he was your first while you weren’t his. That shit hurts. You knew you were just going to remain as his best friend forever.

you lied. you were probably never going to see him again. you might even seek love anymore. you just didn’t want to chase some guy again just for him to fall in love with someone else. you failed. you weren’t supposed to fall in love with him. but, it was just your fate. you really couldn’t do anything about that.

Getting over him will not be easy, especially if he continues to blow up your phone. Why don't you delete all those photos of him since keeping them will only make you miss him more? Since you probably won’t see him again, keeping something special to you wouldn’t hurt. right? It is Jake, after all. The one who could always make you chuckle. The one who always made you feel better when you were sad. You guys made so many moments together that it was impossible to forget them all so quickly. But now, you will never see that again.

They weren't mistaken; love isn't always pleasant. Love is not always like those fairytales or those dramas. Love hurts. So much.

Maybe in another life you’ll have your happy ending.

A/N : woah first written oneshot..? kinda bad but 🤕 this was fun ^^ its my first time writing smth angst so i would love some feedback on how to improve 😞😞 anyways i hope you enjoy !!

PERM TAGLIST [OPENED]

@son4taa . @luveuly . @luvhooniez . @ahnneyong . @hanienie . @ilovewonyo .

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tau1tvec · 9 months ago

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Hi, i love your photos are you planning in play some of the upcoming life sim and take photos too or you are not interested in them? Also what do you thing of them? Do you thing they will be good?

Ty, I’m glad you like them! 💕

I plan to play them, yes. I’ve been waiting for a lifesim from another developer for some time now, as I know a lot of others probably are. Though as for whether I think they’ll be good, it’s hard to tell. I know a lot of people are quite frustrated with where The Sims series is going lately, and I can’t blame them, I’ve certainly felt a lot of that frustration myself these last four years, but luckily I can still play The Sims 3 which I’ve really fallen in love with again, and helped me realize that I don’t actually need another Sims!

I’m convinced that nothing will ever replace the experiences I had with The Sims, The Sims 2, and The Sims 3, including a few other spin offs, and even the first six or so years of The Sims 4 all offered me a pretty good amount of fun in their own special ways.

I don’t wanna replace them, esp when I can just go back and play them if I want that experience again, well maybe except TS4, but hopefully modders will fix it when EA gives up on it.

I guess what I’m saying is, I’m excited about these games, especially Paralives, but not because I need it to replace something else, and not bc I don’t think it can, but bc I want a new and fresh experience on a genre that has a lot of room for new interpretations. Paralives is giving me cozy vibes so far, a far cry from the silly chaos common in The Sims, which is gr8, bc I love cozy games, and I feel like it’d fit well in a lifesim since a lot of its player base meanders between games of this sort anyway.

Regarding the other two ( Life By You and Inzoi ), it’s kinda hard to know what to think about them atm, and I feel about the same for Project Rene, bc their devs and publishers don’t quite have the best reputations with players. Perhaps when they have something more solid to show, and prove they’re actually as passionate and devoted in delivering something that is as fun, as it is profitable, I can better make up my mind.

#asks #anon

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wrongpublishing · 11 months ago

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Increase Your Literary Body Count in 2024

by Mathew Gostelow.

"In my slut era," I whispered, sending the story out on its ninth simultaneous submission.

At the most recent count, I wrote 60-odd things in 2024 and submitted them a total of 202 times in all. 42 of them were published in some form. Along the way, I racked up 90 rejections. All in all, I published somewhere around 44,000 words in 2023.

I was whoring my stories all over, like some sort of village bike made of ink and shamelessness. I spent a year subbing sluttily. I had a blast doing it too. I got a fair few publications under my belt, made new friends, and learned some lessons as well. Here’s just a few of them…

Change horses midstream

I’ve discovered I work best when I’m juggling multiple projects at once. It sounds counter-intuitive and I guess it might not work for everyone, but I reckon everyone should try it.

The idea is to have several stories on the go at one time. Three feels ideal. I find that I will inevitably run out of steam on a piece – my interest or focus always flags at some point. Switching to something new acts as a vital palate-cleanser. I’m able to return to each project afresh, bringing new energy and perspective thanks to the time I spent away.

Follow the fun

Don't be afraid to mix it up. Move out of your comfort zone.

If your latest flash isn’t quite working, why not rewrite it as a poem? Or mash it together with another half-finished piece and see what happens. In a longer piece, it’s okay to jump straight to the scene that's exciting you in that moment. Fill in the gaps and the preamble later.

Try things out. Write flash, write microfiction, write a poem. Seen a shiny prompt? Go for it. Plunge into a genre that you'd normally avoid. You might have fun, you might learn something. You might even end up with a story worth submitting.

Lean into your weird

I'm not saying you're weird, but… you’re totally weird. The way you tell stories is uniquely yours. You understand the world through the filter of your own personal experiences. And you express those observations in wonderfully idiosyncratic ways.

One thing this prolific year taught me is that I love my writing more when I delve into those quirky parts of me. It could be sharing an oddly-specific fear in a horror story, or playing with words in a way that feels pleasing and musical to me.

Putting those unusual parts of yourself out into the world can be scary, but it's also fun. And I've found that readers and editors seem to respond to it as well.

Sim-subbing is addictive - but tread carefully

Simultaneous submissions are great. Is that one mag taking a bit long to decide on whether they want you piece? Send it somewhere else. Feel those sweet endorphins coursing through your veins. Oh yeah. That’s the stuff.

Here’s what I learned from a year of very heavy simultaneous submissions: Send a piece out to as many places as you like – but only if you're equally happy with ever possible outcome. That’s the important bit.

If you have your heart set on a specific home for a story then for gawd’s sakes don't sub it anywhere else until they have decided. Otherwise you risk tying yourself in knots if/when one of the lesser mags accepts it before your dream publisher has decided.

Play fast and loose!

Themed calls are great. They can be inspiring, sparking fresh ideas in our minds. Or help us to see our existing stories in a new light. But here’s what I learned this year: don’t be afraid to come at the theme from an obtuse angle.

Editors must get tired of reading 50 different permutations of the same story. Your off-kilter take could be just the breath of fresh air they're looking for.

And if you have a story already written when a call comes along and it feels like it's close-ish to what they're looking for, then you should throw it in the mix. What have you got to lose?

A true story from this year:

I had a story accepted after misunderstanding what a themed call was all about. I didn’t read the instructions carefully enough and subbed the wrong thing. I realised immediately after pulling the trigger and considered withdrawing my piece. For some reason, though, I didn't. (Slut era!) The editors saw something in my story and accepted the piece.

Moral: Don’t slavishly follow the theme. Go crazy.

Dilute the sting

Rejections can hurt, especially if you have your sights set on a specific magazine or anthology. But you know what helps? Rebound sex. Er… I mean, rebound submissions. Get that same piece back out there. Heck, send it to two places. Go crazy. You get closure by moving on. Also, the more you submit, the more rejection notches you get on your bedpost. And you know what, after a while you’ll find it starts to sting a lot less.

So there you go. Lessons from a promiscuous wordmonger. Why not try to up your literary body count in 2024? You might like it. Repeat after me: “Slut era”.

Mathew Gostelow (he/him) is the author of two collections; See My Breath Dance Ghostly, a book of speculative short stories (Alien Buddha Press) and Connections, a flash fiction chapbook (Naked Cat Publishing). He has been nominated for the Pushcart Prize, Best of the Net, and Best Microfiction. @MatGost

#essay #submissions #writing #writers #writing advice #literary submissions #lit mags #publishing advice #publishing #horror anthologies

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generation1point5 · 2 years ago

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True love is possible

Only in the next world - for new people

It is too late for us

If there was any summary of the sentiments that encapsulate my thoughts and response to Echo, it is this line from Disco Elysium. Though decidedly on the psycho-paranormal spectrum of narrative than political, the same sentiment is expressed. A complex combination of psychological and paranormal factors, external and internal forces, contribute to an intense and gut-wrenching backdrop for a horror-themed visual novel. Because of this, Echo’s focus and sentiments trend extremely closely to Night in the Woods. Like Disco Elysium’s more American counterpart, the culture and sentiments expressed in Echo are decidedly exclusive to the geographical area of its setting. Its approach is undeniably rooted in American individualism and the American psyche, tailored further to portray the particular quirks of the post-frontier United States.

Normally I’m not really one for horror, having not enough of a visceral imagination for Steven King but also lacking the stomach for the same genre in motion picture. Echo, for its part, trends more towards the former than the latter, and the genre serves as an excellent backdrop to explore themes of generational trauma, the border between perception and reality, and the external and internal circumstances that become the driving force behind the formation of identity and interpersonal relationships.

Like Adastra, Echo acknowledges a baseline awareness of socioeconomic conditions, but it’s primary focus lies elsewhere. Adastra has often been described by others as an inversed dating sim, while Echo is often described as an anti-dating sim. The analysis carries merit on a number of points for consideration.

If horror and fear is the recognition of one's helplessness in the face of a dire threat, it is only natural that the game presents a perpetual and necessary sense of powerlessness to the cast of characters; whether driven by their own will or by circumstances they are helpless to alter, they are all subject to forces that can neither be fully articulated nor influenced. None of them fully understand themselves or their peers; the bonds that unite the cast of friends and define them all are contextualized by trauma, even victimhood. Their efforts and desire to escape their victimhood defines them as much as the victimization itself. There are “better” endings and some “worse” endings, but I don’t think any of them could truly be said to be “happy.” No matter whom you choose, no matter what route is pursued, there is no “ideal” or “perfect” ending for Echo. The sense of futility instilled within the player is given as a disclaimer from the very beginning.

You’re only going in circles.

Historical trends within Echo are cyclical; likewise, the paths available to the player do not necessarily distinguish between “good” and “bad” endings, but merely serve to paint a clearer picture of what happens. The other routes do little other than to add splashes of color to what is largely an already foregone conclusion. Pursuing all of the routes is better performed as an act of morbid curiosity than any sort of hope that things will turn out fine.

Of course, the pull and the quality of Echo as a visual novel is getting the player to, in fact, care for the characters trapped in a largely bleak situation. Unlike Adastra, I had incentive to approach the game at arm’s length, but even with my reservations in mind, I ended up hooked onto just about every character and route presented in the game. Perhaps it is just my parasocial and sentimentally-prone heart being at odds with my better judgement, but that is part of the draw, the appeal of this visual novel; it pits the heart against the mind, hope against hope.

From here on, since I will be getting into specifics and potential spoilers, I’m putting the rest of my review under a readmore.

The limited impact of player choice recurs frequently in Echo in a myriad of ways; Chase as a protagonist lacks agency not only as a result of his own socioeconomic conditions and past trauma, but also by the very nature that his actions are partly determined by the player’s choices as well as the remnant influence of Samuel Ayers. Sometimes this manifests as internal monologue inconsistent within Chase’s own mind, and in more extreme examples, locking players into a single choice and even a perspective shift to the second-person. In such instances, the narrative is railroaded into advancing the plot. In other circumstances, the player is hampered by the dispositions and actions of the characters themselves. Few (if any) opportunities exist for the characters to change who they are; many have already grown into themselves with varying degrees of personal baggage and history that largely determine their behavior and reaction to certain events. Chase as protagonist and player character, by contrast, has extremely little personal autonomy and personality, despite having a name and a backstory that cannot be changed, only discovered.

The only notable exception to this rule is in Flynn’s route, where the player experiences a perspective shift from Chase to Flynn, accompanied by a restoration of Chase’s personality and individual identity at the direct erosion of Flynn’s. It’s a subtle implication that the nature of the player’s choices and interactions alter the identities of the characters by whose perspective they take. There is a give-and-take dynamic at work; we get to see the inner workings of the friend group from the protagonist’s perspective even as their perspective is altered by the player’s presence. This is most pronounced when Sam’s thoughts intrude on that of his host character. In general, the player’s experience in Echo serves to highlight the disconnect between influencing an individual directly and the ability to influence the people around them, not in the least because there are other external forces competing for control as well.

Further complicating this dynamic are the presence of the paranormal entities that amplify and otherwise alter the already unstable disposition of the people of the town, some borne of intense desire, others out of an almost consequential animus from past misdeeds committed in Echo. A scientific explanation for these occurrences is sometimes posited but never directly linked; what is clear is that the cyclical appearance of these entities is triggered by a slow accumulation of injustice and suffering that spill over in key moments that trigger the mass hysteria in the town. The experiences are simultaneous and shared to some degree, but are often perceived differently, colored by the accumulation of (often traumatic) experiences of those witnessing the events unfold. Some of these entities are manifestations made to witness tragedy, others entities seem intent to directly incite them. There is no clear dynamic between the forces that seem to overlap and intersect with each other at various points in the story; only that their appearance is the mark of a general decline of sanity for the town. Prevention other than complete avoidance is impossible; efforts to mitigate its effects are limited.

Though the exact causes of Echo’s decline are not made entirely clear, the pattern of mass hysteria throughout its troubled history, coupled with a broader socioeconomic decline over the decades, reinforces a general impression of inevitable failure. By the time of the events depicted in the visual novel, it is all-but guaranteed to become nothing more than a troubled memory. Its persistence is largely the result of habit, the last gasps of people living in spite of their circumstances, and a seemingly overall desire to salvage what good is left. The existential crisis is palpable; a sentiment that is also shared with Night in the Woods.

But here Echo takes the paranormal and the psychological breaks a little bit further. What happens, exactly, when we hold on to anything at the end of everything? Each of the routes are an answer to this question, none of which are designed to be all-encompassing or comprehensive; the act of choosing a route is simply a different examination of how the cookie crumbles.

Of all the routes in the game, Carl’s shows a good deal of character growth, detailing the ram’s journey of paralysis and coping in the face of his fears and expectations placed upon him to a broader acceptance for responsibility in the choices available to him in life. This is, in part, dependent on the player’s choice for him to face his fears directly or to rely on external forces to bolster his shortcomings. The horror setting serves as a backdrop to force a resolution to Carl’s issues, when so much is at stake. Should Chase encourage him to be his own person and not rely on the ghost of his dead ancestor, he will be set on the path of self-actualization. It is not a momentous or glamorous occasion; it is grounded and modest, an honest reckoning of himself and his circumstances that dispels the hold that the socioeconomic legacy of his family has upon him. He frees himself and Chase is there to witness it; but as a result of all this effort spent with a single individual, the rest of the cast of friends all turn out worse by the end of the hysteria, to varying degrees. In terms of material conditions, Carl is given more than any of the others the means to break from the legacy of his past despite the ways he is also hampered by it. The rest are not so lucky.

A prominent but mostly background force in Echo is that of family; many that try their best to accept and love one another and many more that are broken, dysfunctional, and outright abusive, and all of them a product of their cultures and socioeconomic conditions. Though distant and fairly permissive, Carl’s well-off family offers him a secure foundation towards financial independence and success, and to this end has also railroaded him with expectations that he one day assumes the mantle of the family business. Leo’s own family sticks closely together as a tight-knit group of immigrants from a distant country, one that shares much of their lives with each other and expects, at least to some degree, reciprocal goodwill. Leo himself buys fully into this mentality, even as he easily grasps the idea of family beyond blood relations. It also comes with traditional expressions of heteronormativity and patriarchal attitudes. The same heteronormative expectations are reflected in Chase’s otherwise loving and accepting family, and expressed in much more toxic ways in Flynn and Sydney’s parents. At first glance this toxic heteronormativity can be attributed to the religiosity of the two characters’ families, but this dynamic is not evident in TJ’s own deeply religious background. TJ himself could be considered a more ideal product of someone who had more or less fulfilled the expectations of his parents, to both the benefit and detriment of his person. Socioeconomic considerations for the characters’ families play a greater role in affecting the growth and the outlook of the friend group, as evidenced by Jenna’s impoverished household. Their coping mechanisms in the face of poverty often turned self-destructive and abusive without the presence of religion in their lives. Jenna in turn sought to escape her conditions but also to understand them; she hints at her political views more often than most others, and her interest in psychology is rooted in not only understanding her own situation but also how similar life events have affected all of the people around her. Broadly, those within loving families adopted their parents' values to some extent, while the others found it easier to make (and value) their own choices in life. In some respects, the latter grew up faster, though it is also notable to point out that TJ, not only being the youngest, is also treated as the baby of the group.

TJ’s route is less about his own personal growth and more about how Chase’s desire to nurture and protect him leads to an extreme psychotic breakdown, culminating in a (repeat) murder and the reinforcement of the cyclical violence that plagues Echo. TJ’s fragility and non-aggression makes him something of a victim that Chase feels compelled to protect; it is not the first time that he has acted in response to this compulsion. Here we see the road to hell, paved with good intentions; Chase in his efforts to protect the remnants of good from otherwise awful parts of Echo perpetuates the same cycles of violence that ultimately lead to the town’s final demise. This compulsion is not unique to Chase; the entire group dynamic involving TJ reflects this at-times unhealthy protectiveness of his apparent naivety, albeit to lesser extents. TJ remains a victim partly because of the tendency of his friend-group to treat him as such in an effort to protect him from harm.

One of the most dominant (and relatable) themes within Echo is pain aversion, not only oneself but for the community that one identifies with. These manifest in all sorts of coping mechanisms and scars that manifest in both beneficial and harmful consequences down the road. Drug use features prominently, as does therapy and prescribed medication, but none of this addresses the root cause of the chronic illness plaguing Echo. The wounds that fester run much deeper, beneath an already thin veneer of civilization until the caustic buildup spills out into a mass-hysteria event. All at once, everyone’s personal problems and historical baggage become everyone’s problem, and the cycle begins again. While there may be healing of the initial wound, there is no restoration in the aftermath, only scar tissue and new points of sensitivity, fertile ground for the cycle to begin afresh.

Of all the routes, Flynn’s is the clearest glimpse players get into the paranormal workings of this cycle. Indeed, his inability to process his grief with the others as a result of unresolved questions over Sydney’s death is what drives him away from the group, and join into a gruesome and timeless entity positioned to glimpse at all the moments of great suffering and tragedy that kicks off the cresting wave of hysteria. His desire for answers ultimately outpaces his capacity for relationships with his friends, and even his own desire for closure. The price for the knowledge he desperately seeks is his own identity, his very personhood. He merges with the cycle and becomes witness to it. Of all the characters in Echo’s cast of friends, Flynn was understood least, in no small part for his frustration and relative inability to express himself with any degree of sincerity outside of biting, dry humor and his stilted desire for intimacy following the death of his closest friend Sydney. His transformation marks the end of the road where his trauma drives him, where he becomes a stranger even to himself, losing all sense of self.

This end strongly contrasts with Jenna’s route, which arguably contains the strongest example of player agency affecting the outcome. It has one the most positive of the endings available and arguably one of the worst; a decision that is largely contingent in the face of an existential, yet everyday question. How much control can we exert over our own will? Over others who seem to have no power to control themselves or the circumstances they were subject to? When agreeing with her initially negative mindset, she is intent on wiping the wounds of the past (the whole slate really) clean through violence, first by the murder of Heather and then by the flooding of the town of Echo. But when Chase encourages her to see the good in the company of friends that gave her the solidarity to endure, Jenna can forgive and let go of her past rather than destroying it. Most of the others are given the opportunity to do the same, and in the end they all survive. The group retains its cohesion despite their flaws and is given a clear road to move on; Echo is left behind forever. The cycle continues, but they are no longer party to it.

And then, of course, there’s Leo.

I saved his route for last because I found it odd that the anchor bracelet on his arm is the same as the icon used for cursor mouse in-game. Being Chase’s ex-boyfriend and the catalyst behind the whole group get-together in the story, it was clear his role in the story was meant to be a central one; even so, knowing how messy things would be, I avoided going for his route until I had exhausted all the others. In a stroke of irony, I believe this is what ended up making me fixate on him the most, and (despite my best efforts) wanting to see him happy; not just happy in the sense that he would no longer captivated by Echo, but happy because his old happiness could be restored to him. But this is a horror VN, and Leo of all the characters can never truly get a happy ending. For both narrative and character reasons, I knew he would not find what he was looking for. What he seeks had died and was buried three years ago; to try and bring it back would be a necromancy of the worst order. And so, in the act of giving the wolf kept taking, until what he had become was a stranger and a monster, unable to understand that he had sacrificed everything: himself, his friends, his former lover and best friend, for a temporary and psychotic happiness. I had understood this from the beginning, and yet I could not help but desire for a path forward for Chase and Leo to be together once again.

Part of Echo’s peerless quality is its ability to showcase the past in the rose-tinted lens and the lens of trauma in equal measure. It is not simplified of its complexity, nor reduced to a lesson in building character. The people in Echo do their best to deal with the past, clinging to the good and rejecting the bad each in their own way, and often to their own detriment. All the same, the past exists independent of the desires and aims set upon it, and its echos reverberate to the present day from the days of old, far beyond any single lifetime. The weight of thousands of years of history exercises itself upon the world, heedless of the will of the living to alter it.

Both in spite of this animus and because of it, there is a persistence to Echo; it is not a town that passes into memory from apathy and despair, but from illness, neglect, and the chronic failure that has been present from the beginning. Echo’s paranormal conditions merely accelerate the pattern of history that had followed the people who had founded the town, and all who had come and gone since. It magnifies the essence of, for a lack of a better term, the human condition. Even as Echo itself expires in the face of its own entropy, the lives that once called it home live on, forever marked by the scars it leaves behind. It does not kill them, and yet it will not fully disappear. Humanity in its near entirety permeates every single aspect of Echo as a visual novel. It is existential persistence in its rawest form.

This existential persistence is the same found in Night in the Woods, the same as in Disco Elysium. It is far removed from any sort of idealism, or any sort of ending that resolves all the underlying issues plaguing the characters from the beginning until the moment the player enters their lives. In this respect, Echo and its sentiments deconstruct the traditional purposes and structures of its genre. None of the characters who seek romance here will find it. For those within the cast that do, it remains a possibility for the future, but that future is beyond the world of Echo, and beyond its people as they currently find themselves. As far as love relates to Echo itself, there is only a shadow and a passing remnant that ought never make its return.

#personal #blogging #echo vn #echo project

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civilization-illstayrighthere · 1 year ago

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Re; That Kerry being dismissive thing- RIGHT?! Wasn't he in the middle of setting up the concert? He was just busy at the moment! I'm sure that if V called at a different time, when he was travelling or had a free moment he'd talk to them properly. Other than his ego, which like, you're right about, he's a busy man, who can't just have an inpromptu catching up session because he has milions of fans and eurodollars on the line. I think that he's being reasonable, he gives V an estimate of when he will be free and when they will be able to meet up again, and he even promises them a trip to wherever they'd like.

I think that a lot of people have this very demanding attitude towards romantic interests in video games, where they are basically pure wish fulfillments who change 180 when you romance them and do nothing but cheer on the player's every decision and tell them how much they love and mean to them. In cyberpunk you really feel like they all retain their personalities, good and bad parts, and you just happen to be in a relationship with said person, not someone who lost all their edges to cater to your character. The characters take logical actions when viewed through their own internal logic- Judy leaves and gets married, Panam is furious when she thinks V ghosted her and is still pissed, River doesn't want to mix up V in a potentially dangerous situation and Kerry focuses on his career. They won't magically drop everything just because V resurfaced, things happened in these two years and V can't do anything about it but accept it.

I agree 110% with you. He’s in the middle of setting up a concert, and despite having his attention pulled every which way is trying to give V as much of him as he can. Which is quite generous, considering he is an international rockstar and incredibly busy. Not only do people have a strange view of romantic interests in video games, but I also think a lot of fans want the romance in video games to follow traditional Romance parameters, and unless it’s a dating sim, I would not consider most video game plot genres or even sub genres to be Romance. Giving up everything for your one true love is fine and logical in a traditional Romance storyline— Cyberpunk 2077 is not that. Cyberpunk is true to its namesake, it’s dystopian, it’s bleak, it has an amount of realism that a lot of traditional Romance pushes to the wayside in favor of happily ever after and tropes that, when looked at w any sort of consideration of realism, would actually be a collection of red flags.

#this is not me saying i dont like the romance genre! but it has different rules #expecting a tragedy to follow those rules is silly. its out of place. it serves no purpose of the story #and that’s another fan thing i suppose: the purpose of the story is very rarely your blorbos and romances #pawel had a great lets play where he discusses how for him characters are tools to advance the plot #and Kerry especially is a character to tell a story for both johnny and v #and i think he tells that story beautifully. ain’t my fault ppl dont know how to read #anyway thank u for sending this ask1 #sorry if it took a bit my notifs are kinda wonky #cp 2077

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tendebill · 1 year ago

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What would happen if you threw eveyone of your ocs in a room together?

Im just askin for... research... purposes...

Lets go with that.

[oc]

ok i have some silly and light-hearted ideas for this actually xddd

(also im limiting this to main ocs or ocs i consider to be important or fun enough for the purposes of this)

if not for the way the entirety of the main plot plays out, i think Maffi and Huen might've gotten along. if this was in a vaccuum and not in any particular spot in the story, i think Maffi and Huen (and maybe even Seph who knows) would be in a corner just fucking talking about politics and philosophy and shit.

Ellie and Bitzy would probably be making friendship bracelets, or talking about comics or any sort of pop-culture interests that they share. probably would recommend fanartists and fanfics to each other too. a few people would try to join them, but they either dont understand the popculture of their worlds (which is very similar, if not the same) or dont care enought about it. theyre mostly left to their own devices. overtaken by the 'tism.

Angelica would probably be telling stories of her time as a treasure/artifact hunter and an actual godslayer. if Hinata's there with Bitzy, they would probably catch up and tell the stories together, since Hinata went on a lot of adventures with Angelica when they were younger.

David would be very... put off by Huen's mere presence. even if all of the plot didn't happen and this whole "get-together" wasn't canon, i think Huen's aura would just scare David shitless. you could even say he dislikes her on the basis of bad vibes alone. which is mutual, considering Huen HATES when someone is taller than her, and David's got a solid 10cm on her. yea, he avoids her like the plague and she does not mind (maybe intentionally sends him threatening looks across the room). actually i think almost everyone would avoid Huen to the best of their ability.

maybe Dots would hang out with David a bit? they have a sort of reluctant friendship in the later stages of the story. she feels pity for him, despite his own actions being the main reason why he suffers, so she helps him a bit when no one else is there to put up with him anymore (i might elaborate on that in another post, cuz i think its interesting lol). oh, i like to think she'd share her recipies with him? he can't cook, but he'd like to learn and she has a whole backlog of healthy meals to share :3 also she definitely recommends him some cool self-care products. also i think they share a love of home makeover shows (tho David wouldn't admit it). just wait until Ellie introduces them to the sims.

if TomJulCent are there... i have a headcanon that Thomas and Seph get along really well. in general i think Thomas Julia and Vince would like Sephoras and vice versa. Tom would drag Seph away from the debate going on in the corner and they'd get up to some tomfoolery (more or less legal, depending on the mood) or just talk and joke with each other.

Oh, Vincent would probably have a lot to talk about with Cyan, since they're both musicians! i can imagine them first hitting it off and getting along really well, until one of them says some "controversial" opinion about a certain artist or even a whole genre of music and all hell breaks loose. Julia and James (or Angele) would probably separate them, but it'd be too late and now they're sworn enemies.

speaking of, Julia and Angele would get along. they've both got "i am done with these idiots, but theyre my idiots" as their life motto and i think they would have a lot of fun complaining to each other, considering they would understand what the other has to put up with.

also, since David, Huen, Maffi and Seph all like playing chess, i could imagine them staging a mini tournament. no idea who would win, but it'd be worse than playing uno. Huen would definitely underestimate David, who is REALLY GOOD at chess, and it would piss her off. Seph and Maffi's duel would be the least "aggressive" and all in good fun (they probably play chess together anyway regularly so yk), Seph and David would insult each other (in good fun too, but it'd get brutal at times), Seph and Huen would be filled with easy conversations with an underlying meaning behind every word they say, trying to throw the other off (Huen would outmanipulate Seph pretty soon though, lets be real), Maffi and Huen would be dead quiet, not even a twitch of an eyebrow in sight, stone faced and focused on the game and nothing else, Maffi and David would be tense as fuck, but not in a negative way, since the two of them have played against each other countless of times, so they have a lifetime long score to keep updating.

James and Dots would be checking up on everyone. Lucy would be sitting quietly in a corner with a guitar or a ukulele to provide some ambiance, since she's not much for socializing in big groups. Angelica and David would have an arm wrestling competition at some point (David would call bullshit on some part of Angelica's stories and it'd escalate), which both Maffi and Huen would scoff at (but Maffi would obviously be on her wife's side all the way) while Seph would be ALL IN for this, give him front row seats and some popcorn, he's placing bets as we speak.

if Dominica got involved though.... pure chaos. she would shapeshift into every other fucking person and slowly, overtime make people think they were losing it. hallucinating entire conversations, missing important bits information, learning things that turn out to be untrue, until, eventually, everyone's at each other's throats over something they allegedly said or did. by which point Dominica would sit back and enjoy the view, with only Seph and Huen remaining, as they'd be pretty used to her bullshit and antics by this point and would have refused to fall for them again.

also i always loved the idea of my ocs singing and playing music together. ive had an idea of Lucy teaching Seph the basics of how to play guitar (he's horrible at it). i think Cyan would have the most random assortment or "hey I can play that", and so on. also i made Cyan James and Seph (and Ellie) into a band AU at one point for funsies but thats besides the point lol

also if this happened at ANY point in the story it would be a category five shitstorm, tears shed, feelings hurt, someone would die, the room would be trashed.

tysm for the question bro!! i hope my answer was to your satisfaction xd (if im crazy enough, i might use some of this for oc doodle inspo)

#tendebill ocs #long post #oc lore #ask box #ask response #deghost my beloved #brought to you from my drafts

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mioons · 5 months ago

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“peach eyes and blue skies — i’ll be with you on your ride”

pairing. jake sim x fem. reader ୭ৎ mlist

genre. fluff, strangers to lovers wc. 958 warnings. kissing, use of princess one time extra. requested by @raellynaaa + happy birthday sunoo <3

— in which jake meets a peculiar girl at the animal centre, wanting to get to know her more, he visits often and love starts to bloom between the both of them

jake himself didn’t even realise his room was piling up with dog treats, toys, and books on how to take care of them. but it’s not like he needed them anyway.

rewinding to a few weeks back, jake recently discovered there was an animal care center near his neighbourhood. having a dog himself, of course, he wanted to visit the place.

the first time he entered, he was greeted by a bunch of dogs running up to him, wagging their tails and sticking their tongues out. and then that’s when you appeared. you were kneeling on the ground playing around with the cute little puppies, making weird faces and mimicking their barks.

jake swore he saw an angel with his naked eyes. how were you so stunning? all you were wearing was an apron, jeans and a plain shirt with several multi-coloured clips in your hair. he had completely forgotten about the dogs and got lost in the thought of you. how your hair looked so smooth; he wanted to run his fingers through it, or how your eyes looked so pretty or ho-

“hello? do you need something?” you asked him while you were still on the floor. you didn’t even realise someone entered, causing you to become a little flustered. snapping him out of his daydream, you stood up and walked up to him. for someone who looked like an angel the way you spoke didn’t reflect that. jake’s eyes widened before they darted down at the ground then back up at you, “uh.. no.. i dunno, i just wanted to check the place out since it’s new.”

before you could reply, a dog started nuzzling its head against your leg and you picked it up, stroking its head. “yeah you can look around if you’d like,” you replied. jake thought you were so cute, how your whole demeanour would change while you were handling the animals but you were so sassy with people.

“are you the only one handling the store?” he asked and walked around the centre, looking at the shelves filled with books on how to take care of certain animals and animal treats. you placed the dog back down on the ground and rested your elbow on the side of the counter, your chin on your palm, “not exactly, my brother comes by sometimes..”

jake nodded his head in acknowledgement. “do you own pets?” you suddenly asked and looked up at him, realising how attractive he actually was. jake nodded once again and chuckled, “a dog, her name is layla, she’s a real cutie.”

“bet i could treat her better than you could,” you gave him a smirk and folded your arms across your chest. you pushed your hair back behind your ears, the light highlighting your features even more. “you talk as if she’s my girlfriend or something,” jake laughed and went a little closer to you, placing his hands on the counter and trapping you.

he smelt like raspberry and vanilla and he was too close to you. you pushed him away gently before clearing your throat, “bring her next time m’kay?” you said and walked off to another room, closing the door behind you which left jake alone.

fast forward to the present, jake was a regular visitor at the centre, often bringing in layla and using the excuse of, “i need to borrow books on how to take care of layla.” as if he hadn’t already borrowed 5 within 3 days.

jake would also frequently help in the centre, learning how to groom the dogs while you laughed at him for getting dog hair all over his body and even his mouth. “dude you look like some sort of monster,” you giggled and pinched his cheek. his face turned red as you giggled, he could listen to you laugh forever.

“shut up, not like you don’t have dog fur on you too,” he teased and nudged your shoulder playfully.

when he was around you two would often bicker. you teasing about his lack of skills and him teasing you for being loud and how the dogs all preferred to be around him and layla.

one time he was over (again) and you were cleaning up the counter. “jake, could you be useful and grab me the spray bottle for a sec?” you asked, using a cloth to wipe the counter, not bothering to look up at him.

jake reluctantly complied and went to grab the spray bottle, walking up to you. and that’s when he suddenly got an idea.

he placed both his hands on either side of the counter, trapping you in between him and the counter. but he didn’t say a word, wanting you to find out yourself.

“jake, what’s taking you-“ you stopped your sentence midway when you turned around and met his gaze; he was smiling at you. not like a playful smile but a genuine smile that made your heart flutter. “hm? what were you going to say princess?” he inquired, his tone slightly teasing.

your face went red and your words got stuck in your throat. your breath hitched as your eyes landed on his lips. his goddamned lips.

any idiot would notice if someone were staring at their lips and jake, obviously being no idiot, noticed it. “i’m gonna kiss you in 3 seconds, push me away if you don’t wanna,” he whispered against your face and slowly leaned down to have his lips meet yours.

3 seconds didn’t even pass before you pressed your lips against his own, your hands grabbing ahold of his collar to pull him closer to you.

at least now he doesn’t have to use layla as an excuse to come visit you.

luvlyhee 2024 :: taglist open ,, send an ask to be added <3

tl: @dioll @chaewonshoney @aprilnotes @en-gelic @luvvsim @jakesangel @ohmydollie

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derinthescarletpescatarian · 3 months ago

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It's a great game for wrecking people's shit! One of my favourite things to see.

You're in luck if you liked its themes because questions of personhood are very popular in scifi.

The problem with me recommending anything is that, as I said, I'm not hugely into the gameplay of SOMA, which means that if you liked the gameplay specifically, I can't recommend anything for you -- I'm sure similar games exist but I haven't played them. I'm a turn-based strategy, simulation game, and walking sim kinda person.

If you like those genres, though, boy do I have some fun scifi recs for you. All of these are available on Steam, which is where I get most of my games.

Citizen Sleeper gets the gold medal for Vibes. It's one of those games that I want to blank from my memory specifically so that I can experience it from the start again fresh. Being the Sleeper was an Experience.

Silicon Dreams leans hard into personhood, memory, and autonomy, and makes you confront such questions again and again. Unforgettable experience. When I woke up in the chair I had heart palpitations.

The Talos Principle is great if you just wanna focus on the philosophy of personhood. Like SOMA, it's all very basic and doesn't require any prior philosophical education or real familiarity with science fiction of this kind at all. Incredibly accessible level of discussion. Also, puzzles! And there's a kitty cat hidden somewhere in the game.

Digital: A Love Story probably won't wreck your shit, it's hardly cutting edge scifi and philosophical deep cuts, but it is fucking adorable. It's set in the near future of 1988 and it's fucking adorable. Its sequels are also interesting enough in their own right but very different in theme.

To The Moon, Finding Paradise, and Impostor Factory belong to a series that gets deeper into themes of memory, identity and personhood as you go. I recommend playing all of them in order. To The Moon doesn't have much in the way of these sorts of personhood themes, but it is a fantastic game (even if it gets facts about Animorphs wrong :( ) and contains necessary backstory and setup for the other two.

Minds Beneath Us is a fantastic little game I just finished that does have these sorts of themes of personhood, although it doesn't dive into them nearly as hard as it could and goes for a different surface story instead. They're there, but light.

Subsurface Circular is a great little game that plays on personhood, service, and inherent limitation. Also you're solving a mystery! That's always fun!

The Turing Test is also great for this. Made me motion sick as all hell though, so if you're prone to simulation sickness, keep an eye out for that.

It's difficult to know whether or not to include INSIDE on this list, because INSIDE absolutely is a game about humans-as-consumable-product, and an absolutely brilliant one at that. Beautiful game, wonderful presentation, unforgettable experience. However, the abstract nature of the story makes it hard to know whether you'd consider the experience of playing it to count as what you're looking for. It is a game that forces you to put in effort to engage with its themes, and you can play through it without engaging at all (although I imagine it would be a very weird experience if you did).

Similarly, OneShot is a game where these themes exist in the background, in the lives of the robots and the concept of "taming", but they're part of the background setting, not necessarily something you're required to engage with.

If I don't mention Thimbleweed Park or Doki Doki Literature Club, somebody will complain, so here they are, technically on this list. But. I think these games were bad. I think they did a really sloppy job and dropped the ball at the end so spectacularly that it retroactively poisoned the entire experience. Doki Doki fans don't @ me.

Again, I should re-iterate that the gameplay of all of these games is very very different to to SOMA. These are mostly walking simulators and puzzle games, with the occasional rpg or detective game in there. If you're looking for SOMA-like gameplay, you'll need a list from somebody who prefers those types of games.

Have you played SOMA? I think it's the kind of fucked up that would make your brain go brrrrrrrr

I have watched other people play SOMA (I don't like playing timing-based or reflex-based stealth segments). It's a wonderful game to watch people who are inexperienced with scifi play because the theme of personhood is incredibly straightforward for philosophical scifi lovers, but for newbies it blows their fucking minds and it is so fuck to watch people with fresh perspectives get whammed by the classics. I've watched people get up to the bit where you have to copy yourself into the diving suit and hear the voice from the other room and only then realised that the other version would still be there and it's great every time. SOMA is an absolutely wonderful game for delighting newbies with, gateway drug for philosophical scifi, I can't recommend it enough. Problem with SOMA is that there's a cafe called SOMA in my town and every time I walk past it I think about the game.

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antisocialxconstruct · 2 years ago

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Hi Charlie! Do you have any recs for some indie cyberpunk games? 👀

My god do I.... A lot of these, especially the proper deep cuts, are fairly short and fall into the IF/VN category, eventually if I have the time to go hunting through more of my to-play list hopefully I can recommend a wider variety.

I'll start with a couple more mainstream titles and then get into the real weird stuff.

Obviously anyone who's been around here a while knows I never miss a chance to profess my love for the Shadowrun games by Harebrained Schemes, although that's pushing the limits of "indie" lmao but for a worthwhile rpg experience that also does a lot to counteract some of my biggest gripes with the cyberpunk genre (particularly the way they handle mental health, addiction, and bodily autonomy), I really can't think of anything better.

Also in the "only indie in the broadest sense" category, for anyone who missed the hype train on Stray I do heartily recommend it. I think it's easy to dismiss that one as sort of a "gimmick" game with how much coverage focused on the pc being a cat and not a lot else, but the game definitely has a lot to say about like... human legacy and the steady march of time. It's hard to say much else about it without spoiling major plot points, it's fairly short but well worth the experience.

Another long-time favorite of mine is RUINER, although I'll freely admit this one is not what I'd call... deep lol. What it is, is absolutely dripping with edgy cyberpunk style and intensely fun to play. I think it does have an underlying commentary on like, the commodification and expendability of human bodies, but it doesn't really take a lot of time to invite you to meditate on that because there are big guns to pick up and sick combos to execute and so, so many people to kill. But maybe that's also part of the commentary 👀

Hacknet is a hacking simulator (go figure) that's very slick and stylish, and if you're not overly familiar with coding and command prompts and such it does a pretty good job of making you feel like you're doing cool hackerman shit without actually asking too much of you on a technical level. I like its sense of humor but I also like the way it occasionally drops a bombshell of a moral quandary on you in the midst of all your petty crimes. I highly recommend getting the Labyrinths dlc to go with it, especially because it'll give you some fun stuff you can take back into the base game.

Hypnospace Outlaw plays like a love letter to the web1 era (and to the power trip of being a community moderator before centralized social media lmao). It has a loose story about what's essentially a shared dream internet, and you're charged with enforcing community guidelines which unfortunately makes you a bit of an outside observer rather than a proper netizen. That provides some context and will carry you through to the conclusion pretty quickly, but ultimately its play/replay value is in uncovering secrets and just delighting in the nostalgia (or the novelty if you're not a 90s kid). The devs are currently working on a sequel(?) that looks like it will actually let you build your own website and interact with other characters in the world, which I'm very excited to see.

Broken Reality is a weird one, and feels a bit like Hypnospace Outlaw but for the early idea of VR. It's also fairly short, but I think it's exactly as long as it should be for the gimmick not to wear out. It starts out as essentially just a surreal walking sim and it's gonna feel like trippy self-referential vaporwave nonsense right up until the tone takes a hard left turn in the third act.

Vapor Trails is still in development, and I admittedly haven't played too much of it mostly because I'm very bad at platformers, but it's got a really nice aesthetic, clever character writing, and what I've seen of the story so far has me intrigued enough to keep throwing myself at it. One to keep an eye on, at the very least.

_transfer is... something very odd. More of an "interactive experience" than a game in the strictest sense, and intended to be played in many short sessions that build on each other bit by bit as you connect with a variety of other intelligences to recover memories about yourself and the world. I don't think I fully understand the story it's telling me and I'm not sure I'm even meant to, but I've played through several sessions and each one leaves me feeling kind of discomfited but fascinated. (I will say $10 may feel a bit steep for what it is, I got it in a bundle.)

Momotype....... okay listen. You're going to go look at this game and think "Charlie has clearly lost its mind, there's no way this is cyberpunk." I need you to just trust me and play it. It's free, it'll only take a few hours to get all the endings. It's Momo.

LOCALHOST is another short one with a fair amount of replay value for the surprisingly varied dialogue trees. You're tasked with wiping some damaged AIs off several hard drives, only to discover that they're all quite chatty, and now you have to decide what to do with them. This one also has a sort of unsettling vibe, and I like the variety of perspectives it has on how AI personalities might manifest.

Subserial Network is by the same developer as LOCALHOST. I've actually only just started this one so haven't gotten very deep into it, but I already find the concept pretty compelling. It's structurally similar to Hypnospace Outlaw, or maybe more accurately to something like Orwell, requiring you to comb through the internet archives of fellow citizens to incriminate them as "subserials": androids who want to forsake their human programming and become more machine. The language used to describe the serializing process has some pretty obvious parallels with both transgender healthcare and treatment for neurodivergence, so I'm really curious to see where it goes with that allegory.

A couple of honorable mentions that aren't really cyberpunk, but have a vibe that just makes me want to include them on this list:

The Magic Circle is essentially a game about game development, with a lot of commentary on artistic integrity and creativity, but the real novelty of it is the amount of stuff it lets you do inside the "game" of the game. It's really hard to explain but it's very open-ended and satisfying.

The Turing Test is, on the surface, a pretty standard "trapped on a space station solving a mystery" puzzle game, and I will say upfront the gameplay probably isn't going to be anything you haven't seen before. The puzzles are pretty good, if you're into puzzle games, but the real reason I'm putting it on the list is because this game was my first introduction to the "Chinese room" thought experiment, and it genuinely had a huge impact on my views and opinions on artificial intelligence.

#ask #merry-harlowe #game recs #rom speaks

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junko-and-riri-domain · 3 years ago

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behind closed doors, away from your eyes | ot7

— pairing: enhypen ot7 x reader — genre: angst, headcannon (kinda?), scenarios — warnings: general mentions of deteriorating health conditions, a mention of lost of appetite (in jay’s), it’s all angst — w/c: idk — request: hello! could i request headcanons for enhypen with a gn!chronically ill s/o? like they have low stamina and chronic pain. thank you!! — requested by: anon — a/n:

lowercase intended + this isn’t really proofread. i kind of changed things up a bit and it’s more along the lines of enhypen after seeing reader “differently”

this has been in my drafts and i decided to post it today bc idk if posted a fic this week lol

i’ll be responding to asks later (or tomorrow) !! i’m dog sitting today :)

lee heeseung

a man who can do it all. “ace” has always been the persona attached to lee heeseung’s name. yet as he enters his apartment with the memories of your date still fresh in your mind, he can’t help but slam his fists against the door knowing that you were in so much pain yet there was nothing he could do to help you. he noticed the way you slowed down earlier when the two of you walked in the park, he noticed the way your hands shakily held his, and he noticed the way you are out of breath quicker than usual. he wanted nothing more than to take away your pain, to be the one feeling it instead of you, to be the one in your place. but no matter what he did, how many nights he stayed by your side, and however many times he held your hand, he just couldn’t. his phone ringing brings him out of his thoughts, quickly he answers your FaceTime call with a smile.

lee heeseung, a man who can do it all — even faking a smile in front of the one he loves the most.

rest of the boys under the cut !!

park jongseong / jay

as the life of the party, being with you was no different. jay liked the way you rolled your eyes before laughing at one of his jokes or your eyes shone before you smiled at his attempts to do aegyo. but earlier today,

“jay, i'm just not hungry right now,” you said with a frown. you were thankful for his efforts but despite all the food in front of you that jay had cooked, you didn’t feel like eating.

“where does it hurt? can i give you a massage?” he offered. you shook your head no,

“can you just take me home please?”

after taking you home and heading back to his own, jay threw out the food, sighing as he did so. he didn’t know what to do anymore, he knew that there wasn’t anything he really could do aside from being a part of your support system but the days that he felt you slipping away with him, he wished you’d take him with you, into the depths of your mind just as how you were in his. instead, all he could do was be there in the ways that you’d allow him to.

park jay, the life of the party — even if it was a party of one.

sim jaeyun / jake

saturdays were the days you and jake went on a walking layla date but today, he was doing it alone. you were in bed and told him to take layla and not wanting to press you on any further, he simply kissed the top of your head and told you that breakfast was waiting on the counter whenever you ready for it, jake knew you never liked it when he saw you in pain, you were stubborn and tried to hide it from him.

sim jake has always been known as the icon of growth — yet how can a relationship grow when both parties continue to run?

park sunghoon

sunghoon entered his apartment, eyes nearly brimming to tears as he ran his hands through his hair. he could get over many things and act indifferent towards other people but when it came to you things were different. he knew he had to keep himself under control, couldn’t lose his composure around you, but it was hard especially after seeing your eyes nearly lifeless, exhaustion written all over your face.

you had asked him to spend the night sleeping over but he left after dinner with you and your parents. he knew that he should’ve stayed but staying would’ve resulted in him admitting feelings he wasn’t quite ready to yet so he left instead.

park sunghoon, indifferent and a man made of ice — but that ice was starting to melt by the heat of reality.

kim sunoo

as the sunshine to thousands if not millions of people things were different with you. because with you kim sunoo didn’t need to be bright and bubbly, he could just be himself plain and simple. you were the reason he smiled, the reason he laughed, and the reason he enjoyed life.

yet after seeing you in the hospital tonight, it was another side that he hadn’t quite realized its impacts. despite your tiredness, you still smiled at him, you still told your corny little jokes in an attempt to get him to laugh, and you had made him realized just how short life could be. there was no tine like the present yet he asked himself, would you two still continue to be able to enjoy the privilege of the present?

yang jungwon

as someone who became the leader at such a young age, it’s safe to say that yang jungwon has faced a lot of pressure in his life. yet nothing could compare to the pressure he felt when you nearly collapsed on him while cooking curry in the kitchen and he brought you to your room. he was completely and utterly 100% lost as to what to do. he followed your instructions the best that he could but it wasn’t until your parents came back home that he was finally relieved.

yet despite the brief relief that washed over him, when he got back to his own home his mind was wracked with thoughts and questions as to what to do and how to help you. and he wondered, could he handle it?

nishimura riki / ni-ki

you had told ni-ki of your illness from the start but he had never really seen the way it truly affected you until your date today. you two had gone to festival to take pictures and eat street food together but when you weren’t feeling well and pain started to attack, you two had to leave early. so he took you home, made you some tea the way jay had taught him, made you laugh a little, and stayed until you finally fell asleep.

if anything, ni-ki couldn’t quite comprehend how this had happened, his mind trying to wrap itself around the situation and the differences. the sight of your once smiling face turning into one of discomfort and pain was a sight he never wanted to see and wanted to prevent in all the ways that he could. he didn’t quite know how to deal, unsure as to how to sort out his feelings because he was still so young.

❦ written by riri ( @enhykkul ) | main blog masterlist | blog navi

↬ taglist: @markleepooh | @sunshineshouchan | @cha-raena | @changmin-wrlds (permanent taglist open)

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koishua · 3 years ago

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♪ 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓. ♪

pairings: sim jaeyoon x fem!reader.

genre: pure angst, songfic.

word count: 1.1k.

warnings: themes of falling out of love, implied major character deaths and suicide (and its overall just a puzzle of a trippy story kinda?? nothing related to gore or violence though!!)

notes from vie: guys. don't let this flop besties. it's my new hymn for the missing hahaha i love it as much as that old kun fic. anyways, idk why this got buried in my drafts for so long, so here you go.

i love hearing your thoughts about my fics, be it in your reblogs or in the replies, so do leave feedback if you're up for it <3 otherwise, hope you enjoy!

listen to 'one more night' by demian for the full experience please!!

taglist: @junityy @igyus @intokook @leavethemonsteralive @iuwon @envirae @fairyjunn @rutosruru-world @daystiny @luvholicz @imdamconfused @renjunvrse @honeyseungz @dweio @rae-blogging @ikigyus @enhyseob @jitaros @jdyunvrs @yunntext @yourlocalhotgf @strwberrydinosaur @mark-lees-world @beomgyuv @chileangring4 @99swinwin @jakeycore @99outros @heejojo @thekinkpopstandsforkrackheads @strqyverse @tyongishs @jiminisyourangel @yutaalove @yangianwon @icywhatim @sunshine-skz @hwallswrld @twntycm @sooblvr @injanggarden @whoe-dis @thegracerammy @k2oi (click here to be added)

There is something eerily peaceful about a night without stars splattered in the far and wide distance to decorate the blanket of darkness, lit only by the moon drowning behind the wisps of ashy clouds. It doesn’t bother you much, though.

He’s with you, that man. He’s right here on the seat next to you, the steering wheel in his hands, heart in yours. He’s here, stripped of his labels and titles, laid bare and clean in front of you, wholly himself and not an image of what everyone else thinks he is when he wears his mask and shield of defiance and authority.

He’s here alone, together with you and so heartbreakingly broken in his essence. He sits on the leather seat, the back of his head resting against the cushion.

One more night, for all our lies.

“I love you.” It’s a beautiful sort of deception, one for the both of you who desperately cling onto any remains of what once had been. It’s there to fill the growing silence, to attempt to close the distance of where you stand, so far away from him and out of his reach.

“I love you too.” He stays numb even when he says those four words, defeat crawling up his skin, biting into it like the cold that creeped up on the edge of the cliff you are perched on top on, the crashing of the waves heard loud and clear. He says it so quietly, words engraved with a dreaded acceptance.

One more say, to close our days.

“I love you.” He blurts it out first this time, just barely holding onto the quiver in his voice, begging his vocal chords not to fail him this night. It’s not the easiest of tasks, though he manages to get those three flowery words out again like a broken recorder.

“I love you too.” You gulp the burning guilt down your throat, feeling parched and drowning at the same time. You feel as though you are drenched in all of the vile things in the world, acid dripping out of your lips like it’s nothing. You wonder if he is hurting more than you are. He probably is in an agony much deeper than yours, you come to realize with a heavy heart.

If I’d be ‘him and you’d be ‘her.

“You’re my moon.” It’s your turn to say something, if only to feel something again. His eyes are trained on the glow that filters through the dreary and hopeless night sky with an ironic smile on his lips. He supposes this isn’t the worst it could have been.

“You’re my sun.” He follows your lead, delivering a sting far more effective than a slap on your face could have ever been. You take your time to digest it, a breathless and humourless laugh escaping your throat without your own consent. It hurts more, because you are aware that your pain is nothing compared to his.

It won’t be hard, the last.

He is your moon, only there when you need his comfort and feel the drape of his peace in times when you are aching. He is just a moon, a fragment of the galaxy that would forever remain insignificant. You are his sun, a raging fire that burns him the closer he gets.

You paint him red and black with your heat and grey as he dissolves into ashes, flames engulfing his being when he dares take a step closer to you, to love you more. You are the sun and yet all he feels is the chilling burn on his skin anytime he wraps his arms around your frame.

One more day for all our times.

“I need you.” He whispers one more time, palm cupping the side of your face and angling his body to face yours. His heart quivers when he feels you nuzzling into his hold, still oh-so madly infatuated by your expressive eyes that look at him, mirroring the tear in his soul. You’re hurting just as much as he is. Why?

“I don’t.” And it crushes you to say those words at him, not that it ever could ever match his rueful gaze, heart far too battered to shed any more tears. He leans in, closer towards the sun and willing to let his wings melt off as if he is Icarus himself, closer to graze his chapped lips on your softer ones. He doesn’t know if he’s freezing or burning, oddly enough.

Why aren’t you pulling away?

I know we’re gone, but ‘gones’ are priceless.

“I miss you.” He reaches his hand to caress your hair gently. You look away, “I’m still here.”

He deflects, “No, you are not. I miss you.”

Ah, there it is, another crack on the glass. He misses you, the one that is gone with the wind. He misses the you that is no more, yet loves the you that remains just as much. He is puzzling and yet, as open to read as your favorite book. “I miss us.”

Be brightly sad, leave this mess.

He smiles and so do you, his light far too contagious not to mimic despite the roar of the engine you note hearing as you get lost in his eyes. He has pretty ones, you know, but the spark isn’t there to twinkle at you anymore. “Let’s be happy again.”

You stare at his hands on the wheel, thinking back on the life you had led so far. It’s not hard to accept, nothing ever has been. And so you nod, reassuring him as his foot presses on the pedal, shifting gears, “Okay.”

Warm my name, the last.

“Let’s try again.” You breathe in, looking at the moon that was finally uncovered for one final time, listening to the crashes of the waves beneath the cliff that seem to be getting closer and closer.

“Let’s be happy again, Jake.” He smiles, pure, lips stretching into a wide grin as the edge comes closer and closer the more he presses on the pedal, speeding. It’s there, the edge, he notices.

He looks into your eyes one last time and then you’re soaring far above the merciless waves for a few peaceful seconds that feel like an eternity. One more night, for the last time in this broken and shattered world.

for eternity in your next.

#enhypennetwork #enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #enhypen x female reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen angst #enhypen jake angst #enhypen jake imagines #enhypen writing #enhypen writings #enhypen #sim jaeyun #sim jake #enhypen jake x reader #enhypen jake

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titilationexpress · 3 years ago

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StarscreamxReader-Sweet Dreams are made of Screams Ch.1

First ever lemon. Please give your input. Reposting from my Ao3.

You haven’t been able to sleep properly for weeks now. And frankly, you’re wondering if you ever will again in your lifetime.

Yet what caused you to have such a problem with something that once came to you so easily? Ok, maybe not easily. No, scratch that. It was never easy. You had to take some sleeping pills every night to even get a few hours in. Still, how did it happen?

Well, the trouble had started back not long ago. In fact, from what you could recall, it hadn’t even been a full month before your ‘problem’ started. See, you were a fairly average individual. You had your quirks, your habits, the little things that make each person an individual. One particular interest you had though was quite specific, and even more, came from a decade long before you were born.

Transformers.

Oh yes, your beginnings were humble when you first started with the franchise, and you looked with wide, awe-filled eyes. Your starting place was where you first discovered it, the one show that will remain in your heart forever. From that, you got into the characters, the story, the lore of what started as a toyline for young boys (though it was clear now that both sexes had a love for it), all of it. And from there, you went on to past and future generations from your starting point, and now, you were a certified Transformers fan! Hell, one of your favorite sites ever is TFWiki.

With this entrance into the fandom, you took to devouring everything that you could: the cartoons and animes, the books, the movies, fanfiction, fanart, fan comics, doujinshi, anything and everything that you could get your hands on, you did. And not long after, you began contributing yourself, drawing, writing, whatever you could to make your stand and have your place in the community. At first, it worked well enough, you weren’t exactly prolific, yet you were doing well enough. You managed to get a few requests for certain things to be drawn/written, believe it or not, but still, you weren’t overly big.

And then came your discovery of the Reader genre.

What is the Reader genre? Why, as far as you were concerned, only one of the greatest genres ever to be conceived! Well, to be more accurate, the form of writing wasn’t anything new, remembering the ‘Choose Your Adventure’ books. It seemed said genre now spread everywhere, you being very aware of the numerous games and dating sims that ranged from well done and engaging to outright ridiculous and stupid (but those were fun in their unique way). And since you didn’t have any knowledge or time to do that, you settled for writing them yourself. Your first piece was a simple Optimus x Reader with the standard plot and standard outcome, which was a declaration of love and a resulting kiss with the Autobot Leader. You were NOT expecting the overflow of response that it had gotten. You were quite shocked, but at the same time, overjoyed. Soon, you decided to try your luck with another one, this one being of Bumblebee, the scenario being mostly the same, albeit with a bit more cutesy fluff, as in your mind, Bumblebee was always the little guy. This one was just as successful, and you beamed, having finally found your calling.

Since then, you were getting requests left and right for more and more choices, all spanning different universes. From the animated cartoons to the comics, different universes, everything that spanned from the most well-known incarnations to the more obscure. It was through these that you managed to get even more into the Transformers multiverse as a whole and even discovered some truly overlooked gems. You opened yourself up to the people and declared that you would write whatever they requested, but you had some taboos that you wouldn’t touch. But any scenario, character, and universe, all of that was fair game.

You had originally begun working on more mundane, typical stories with expected outcomes (but sweet ones nonetheless), yet over time, the requests and your imagination began getting more creative and crazy. Soon, you were delving into several different areas that you had never touched. Elves, goblins, mermaids, vampires, forbidden love, love triangles, all of these were laid at your feet. And while it took a bit to find your rhythm, all of this having come on you so fast, you eventually got it and soon, you had a wide collection of X Reader stories, ranging from G1 to Prime and IDW’s run.

You mainly did Autobots, for you had to admit that writing for them, while they were still complex characters, came somewhat easier for you. True, each of them had their faults and quirks (both from canon and headcanons people had come up with), yet they were still the good guys, and even those with more questionable morality still came out as heroes in the end. But then one day came where you were asked to write about a Decepticon. This threw you for a loop, as, while the thought had intrigued you, you had been writing for good guys for some time, so a total shift in direction was somewhat off-putting and scary. Possibilities of it being too saccharine or sweet, or getting the characters wrong or out of character scared you a bit, yet still, you wanted to test the waters and see if you could do it. And if you could, this would open up so much more for you.

And judging from the input, you had just struck gold yet again.

Soon, not only were you flooded with requests for Autobots, but now their foes were also available, and, as you found out, people had just as much an attraction for the darkness as they did for the light. Again, the same scenarios were implemented, yet now, they had something of a darker edge to them, which allowed you to explore some subjects you couldn’t touch with the Autobots without toning it back somewhat. In a way, the Decepticons provided you with more freedom. Ironic, seeing as Megatron’s motto was “Peace through Tyranny.”

That said, you went through the list of available characters throughout the generations, and so far, those had been garnering quite a following as well, your Autobot and Decepticon stories neck and neck in popularity. Everything seemed to be going well for you.

Then that one question came.

‘Hey, where’s Starscream?’

Then another.

‘Could you write one about Starscream?’’

Then another.

‘Hey, hate to bother you, yet I think that Starscream could use some love here.’

More and more questions and requests for the particular Decepticon filled your messages, and frankly, you were at a loss on what to do. Truth be told, you and Starscream had something of a complicated history. When you had gotten into Transformers, you had heard of the character, yet at first, you never saw why he had gained such a large fanbase. True, he wasn’t a bad character, yet he wasn’t your favorite. But over time, as you wrote more and more for the Decepticons, as well as read X Reader stories from other people, you slowly began to, as one would say, gain an interest in the winged robot. And soon, you found yourself enamored by the smug jerk as well.

But this only made you reluctant to write for him.

True, when you started writing for the Decepticons, you were allowed to experiment with some more intimate and extreme situations, yet with Starscream...it was different. It was hard to explain, yet whenever you got a request to write for him, your brain seemed to seize up. Thoughts came to your head that you had tried to banish, thoughts that came every time you saw the Seeker’s name. You had no idea what was going on or why this was so difficult, yet it seemed the Silver Snake had taken to making your fingers not touch the keyboard.

You had no idea at all. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself.

And since you had gotten the slew of requests, your sleep problems began. The moment you shut your eyes, the scenario began all over again.

…

You needed no introduction to where you were or what you were seeing, it all quite familiar to you now. Around you were towering walls of a silvery mauve color, the only available light from above sparse and leaving several areas coated in darkness. This place was all too familiar, for you had seen it many times in your watching and reading of Transformers.

You were in Decepticon headquarters.

Your dreams had been filled with the base of the enemy faction of the Autobots, and at first, it had shocked you as to why you were here at all. But over time, night after night, you came here, and soon, you grew accustomed to the sight of it. You took on the form of your Transformers persona/OC or remained in your regular, human form, whatever pleased you as if you had some control over this environment. Yet as you grew more familiar (you were never sure if you’d be comfortable), you began to explore the place, finding that, to your surprise, there was no one here. No signs of any sort of life aboard the ship, and while it took a good while, you traveled everywhere you could think of, and still, nothing. No Megatron, no other Decepticons, no one but you had been aboard.

At least, that was what you believed when you first had this dream. Then, you heard it. The voice. His voice.

“Oooh, I’m the Boogie Man,”

Singing, serenading, just loud enough for you to hear, yet low enough for you to know it was far away. It always started this way.

“The terrible, horrible Boogie Man,”

Your ears/audio receptors registered the voice as it echoed throughout the ship. When the dreams had begun, you knew immediately who was singing, and then you were more surprised at how it sounded. Sure, it had its infamous high pitch, yet it wasn’t bad to listen to. Daresay, it was rather enjoyable in its own way.

“I come in the middle of the night and frighten bad little girls like you.”

The first few times you had this dream, it would almost always startle you, yet it led you to look down the other balls and corridors of the ship. The results were always the same though: no one was aboard. No one but you...and him.

“Beware, better have a care,”

The song changed each and every time you entered the dream, tonight being a track you heard on a video game you played not too long ago (Bioshock 2 you believed). Yet the songs always had the same effect on you.

“I’m going to follow you everywhere.”

Despite your trepidation, you wanted...needed to follow it.

“I crawl through the ceiling and the wall and call on bad little girls like you.”

Walking, then running, you traversed the winding path before you, taking several left and right turns, having no sense of direction but that voice. A voice that, despite its infamous sound, held power to it, a siren’s song in a way. Ironic, you thought. Still, you followed, for you had reached your limit. You knew what would happen if you didn’t find him.

“I’ll torture you and hunt you,”

And never leave.

I’ve got you where I want you,”

And never let you escape this dream.

“A victim of my dark and dirty plot.”

And he knew it too. He knew he had power over you. And you hated it.

“And at the slightest whim, I’ll tear you limb from limb,”

Or…

“In other words, I’ll put you on the spot.”

Did you?

“Oooh, I’m the Boogie Man,”

You were close. So dangerously close.

“The terrible, horrible Boogie Man.”

Just a turn around the corner.

“I come in the middle of the night and frighten…”

He paused, you stopping in your tracks at what you saw. There he was. Situated behind violet bars of energy in a cell, the Decepticon stood there with his arms folded and looking upon you with satisfied, hungry red eyes.

“...bad little girls like you.”

It was him.

Starscream.

Your favorite incarnation of Starscream, those ruby orbs boring into your own eyes/optics. You stepped back from the cell, eyes/optics wide at what was before you. Sure, if you were to go by dream logic, some part of you always knew that it was ‘him’ that awaited you at the end of this journey, but still, to actually see him, standing there so casually when it looked like he was locked up, it chilled you. As if he had absolutely nothing to worry about.

“My, my, so you finally found me,” he said, his voice perfectly matching the incarnation that stood before you. “Or rather, I found you. Whichever way it goes, it doesn’t matter,” he smirked. “For I already know the outcome.”

You blinked a few times, still trying to see if who was before you had truly been there. “St…” you began nervously. “Starscream?”

The Decepticon chuckled and stepped out of the shadows, allowing you to fully see him. “In the mesh,” he said. “And I see that introductions won’t need to be made either, will they, Y/N?” your eyes/optics went wide. “That’s right, pet, I know everything. This IS your mind after all.”

“Wh-What?” you stammered. “I don’t understand.”

Starscream’s grin only grew wider. “You will soon. You will understand EVERYTHING.”

Just what was he talking about? From the looks of it, he seemed to be enjoying your tension and trepidation, very amused. Your mind went into fan mode, recalling every fact you had known of Starscream and his various incarnations, which then led to you going on the defensive. “You…” albeit, it took you a try or two. “You’re the one that’s been doing this to me. Giving me these...these weird dreams.” the Decepticon didn’t answer, yet it was clear that he already knew that the secret was out (even if it wasn’t much of one). “You’re also the one that’s not letting me have one decent night’s sleep without being trapped here!”

“Or me serenading you?” he added in. “How do you like it? I don’t do it often, yet if I wish, I can stretch out my vocal components if I want.”

Your cheeks grew hot. Damn, this bastard was already making you too wound up, and you had only gotten a few words in! “Well...I’m here now,” you said, trying to sound confident, and, ironically enough, trying to channel Megatron’s dominating aura. “So, what do you want?”

This didn’t phase him in the slightest. Despite him being the one locked up, you were the one who felt like his prisoner. “I think you already know that dear Y/N,” he said. “But to put it simply, I’m feeling left out.”

You were confused. “Left out?” You asked. “Left out of…” you paused. Indeed, you knew well what he was talking about. “My...my reader inserts.”

Starscream nodded. “Quite an extensive library you’ve built up over time.” He told you. “Though your choices could be much better.” he scoffed. “Of course goody-good Prime would be on the list, along with the rest of the Auto-dolts.” Then he grimaced. “Yet there are those that actually want to FRAG Megatron? Ugh! No taste at all!” He then looked back at you. “You’ve written for everyone, from either faction, of every series,” he then pouted. “But none for me. Truly, Y/N, I’m hurt.”

You felt quite awkward. True, while you were known online for your stories, it was your username and persona they were seeing. They weren’t someone that was right around the corner that could walk in and see you writing these things. While you loved doing it, the thought of your family or friends discovering you wrote in this genre was a thought you dared not entertain, as you swore that you’d die from embarrassment. Thus, you were very careful whenever you did it, your room completely locked tight so you could focus without fear of someone barging in. The only times you left during your writing periods were for bathroom breaks and/or to eat/drink something. It was a big secret...and thinking about it now, it was a secret no more to the most infamous backstabber in all of Transformers. You had been found out.

“Well...so what? Are you going to keep haunting me until I do?” you asked. “You can’t do that!”

Starscream didn’t seem phased by this at all. That damned smirk of his both frustrated and made you excited, a combination that left you very unsure. “Can’t I?” he asked.

You didn’t like his tone. “What do you mean?”

“Well, let’s consider for a moment, Y/N,” he said. “You believe that I’m merely a figment of your imagination, yes? A stubborn thought that is lodged in your subconscious. Am I right?” you shifted a bit, knowing well what he was saying would lead to something else. Something that probably would flip everything on its head. “Well...who’s to say that I am?”

“I...I don’t understand.”

“Of course you don’t. But what I say might just jog your memory.” he then went on. “In your last X Reader, you spoke of multiple versions of the characters, such as Prime and...yes, even Megatron,” Starscream scoffed. “And how it would’ve been peculiar if they met. Then, one of your readers linked you to a page on the TFWiki.” Starscream then chuckled. “Quite an array of knowledge, I must say. Especially for a primitive species such as yourselves. Anyway, said page spoke of what is labeled as the Transformers Multiverse, which, if I may say, is an excuse for you all to toy with and shape us into what YOU want. But back on track, you did a small amount of research on that, then went on about your business.”

“...and what does this have to do with why you’re here?”

Starscream smirked. “Then, after some time, you went and read the entries of me from various series and incarnations. To get a better feel for what you were thinking of writing. What you wanted to write. Only, you never did.” You were about to speak again, but the seeker spoke again before you could. “There was one detail from my earliest incarnation that spoke of a ‘ghost’, an immortal spark that couldn’t be snuffed out. One that could travel through space and time.” He drew closer to the bars. “And then discovered a way to travel through dimensions. Wherein, I found out all about how so many humans have seen my reality behind a television screen.”

What was he talking about? What did any of what he said mean? It was then that it all clicked for you. Sparks were essentially the ‘soul’ of a Transformer, which Starscream’s was indestructible. You read that he made an appearance in Beast Wars, and had made cameos elsewhere. What was before you right now...mere feet away…” Are you.. “ you stammered. “Are you really…”

The Decepticon nodded. “Yes. Yes, I am, Y/N.”

You were left speechless. No. No, this...this was impossible. It...it couldn’t be him! It couldn’t be the REAL Starscream! He was a cartoon, no, a toy! A damn toy! A toy from the eighties that were made to be marketable to young boys (and the girls that were secretly into it) among several other toys that were made be marketable to young boys (and again, the girls that were secretly into it)! There was NO way he was in your mind right now! He wasn’t real! He wasn’t real! He wasn’t-

“You step out into the chilled air, wrapping your arms around yourself as you do.” the Decepticon suddenly began. “He’s there to pick you up. He’s there to pick you up. You’re both terrified and exhilarated, eager to start the night, but also to make it fly by just enough so nothing embarrassing would happen between the two of you.” your jaw dropped when you heard him say that. How did he- “Know that you recently read over your very first entry? The one that started it all?” he then ‘rolled’ his eyes. “The one that clearly displayed that you had little taste at first?”

Of course, you did! That was from your very first X Reader story! It told of Optimus Prime and you, a human, in a relationship. Odd start, you knew, especially given that Transformer x Human relations was sort of controversial, yet overall, it wasn’t a bad one. Still, the fact he knew that…” No.” you said aloud. “It can’t be.”

He smiled. “I am.”

You stepped back until you hit a wall. “S-Starscream.” you stuttered. “You’re him. You’re the...the real one.” he was quite satisfied with your reaction, you clearly flustered yet cautious at the same time. The sensation drove you mad. But then you remember, this was just a dream! You were just making up all this stuff! You were relieved by this revelation...yet at the same time, you were...curious. Just where would this go if you continued? “Well...well, what are you doing here? What do you want?”

“Exactly as I said before, I feel left out,” Starscream told you. “And considering my popularity in this universe, I’d think me being here should tell you something.”

You knew what he wanted. “You want me to write about you.” it was obvious. “I-I know. I mean, I’ve been wanting to. Really, I have. But...but I...I just…” you sighed. If you knew Starscream (and you had at least a decent enough faith you did), you knew that this could potentially earn you his anger. Yet, to your surprise, he didn’t try to order you around. Instead, he seemed like he already knew you were going to say that.

“You can’t,” he said for you. “Understand, I’m the one in YOUR mind. Thus, you could say, I know everything about you. A perk of being something that, in this universe, started out as a drawing on a piece of paper.” you were confused, this seemed to humor Starscream even more. “Oh, come now. Surely you know that concept art exists, right?”

All of this was so insane for you, yet it was then that you felt the urge to speak up and say something for yourself for once. “Well, if you’re here from the...well, YOUR universe, what are you doing here in the first place?”

“Why, this is one of the few places I win!” Starscream exclaimed. “Of course, when I first came here, I was quite perplexed about how I and many others were known as products from a company called ‘Hasbro’. But overtime, I discovered your version of the internet, and, well, as you flesh bags say, the rest is history.” he then continued, not giving you a chance to speak. “And bring that I am an idea in this universe, I can go freely as I wish, peering into minds,” his red eyes looked upon you. “Become one’s permanent muse or vice versa.”

God, you felt weird. You felt so confused and conflicted. You wanted to sink into the wall to get away, but you also wanted to know more about this. You had to know more. You needed to know more. “So…?”

“So, I’ve come to you, as you’re truly in need of some inspiration,” Starscream said. “As well as some changes in your thinking.”

“Like what? Worshiping the ground you walk on?” you ask, feeling a little bolder.

“Oh, you already do.” he said. “If you didn’t desire me, I wouldn’t be here.” he grinned at your shocked expression. “That’s right, Y/N, I know what truly holds you back from writing about me. Your fears, your anxieties, your loves and lusts.” you had no words. “You fear that you may get me wrong if you will. That I won’t be in character. Or you fear that you won’t be able to satisfy the wants of your readers, as I AM so highly anticipated. Or…” he leaned closer to the bars, the only barrier separating you two. “You fear exploring those more intimate pleasures with me. You’re intimidated and unsure. After all, writing for Autobots is easy, yet us Decepticons are more difficult. But it HAS awakened things in you that you wish to explore on either side. Things that you are dying to let out.”

You had no words, he was completely right. Damn him! The smug bastard knew he had you in the palm of his hand...and yet also probably knew that’s what made you so hot and bothered right now! “So...what? Are you here to force me to write those things with you in them?”

“Dear Y/N, I can’t technically make you do anything,” Starscream told you. “Oh yes, I can stay and torment you night after night until either I pass onto another universe or I grow bored of you, but my reason being here is for both our benefits.”

“How?”

“It’s quite simple,” he said. “We shall go through those scenarios in your head.” his ruby red optics bore into yours/your eyes. “Together.” he then reached out from in between the bars and traced a digit around your jawline. “Believe it or not, I want to help you, Y/N.” his voice was smooth and sultry, something you never expected from a voice like his. “But only you can allow me to do so.” he then stepped back from the bars. “This prison of mine is something you’ve constructed from your fears and insecurities. Allow yourself to embrace what you fear…” he then extended his hand again, yet stepped back as well, sinking into the darkness. “Only then, will you truly be free.”

You were at a standstill. You knew what he wanted, and, to your horror, you were wanting to give it to him. Deny it all you want, this was something that had been in your mind ever since you got the first request for the Seeker. You approached the bars, trying to get some sign that he was still there. Surely he hadn’t left you, had he? No, he hadn’t. He was still there, you could feel him. Watching, waiting, and perhaps, knowing what you would do before you did.

Yet would you do it? Would you bite into that forbidden fruit?

Some while after pondering this question, you looked at the cell, the energy bars vanishing. Why fight it when you could already taste the sweet tartness of said fruit in the back of your throat?

#starscream g1 #starscream #tfp #transformers bayverse #transformers animated #transformers cyberverse #transformers x reader #lemon #set up #fanfic #reader #self insert #first part

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supercantaloupe · 2 years ago

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hello! would you be willing to talk about the flaws in d20? what did you mean by structural/cultural flaws?

sure. disclaimer up front that these are just my own opinions and that i don't want them being taken as fact or being taken up with the creators of d20 directly by anyone on my behalf.

i found that the longer d20 went on/the more seasons they produce that the structure and (some of) the content get less and less appealing to me. content wise this is really very subjective; for example i'm not interested in dating sim-type stories, so Shriek Week was never going to be my thing. but even seasons with premises/gimmicks that i like on paper (like anthro characters in Mice & Murder and space sci fi in Starstruck Odyssey) i found to lose my attention as they went on. love the concepts, but the execution was lacking a little bit for me.

but i think my issues with the show structurally are my larger criticisms, and i don't think my personal taste issues with the content are entirely divorced from the structural elements. anyway, what initially hooked me to d20 with fantasy high is the fact that, unlike any other actual play show i'd come across at that point, it had several structural elements in place that grabbed my attention and held it: 1. the episodes were relatively short (between 1-2 hours); 2. the seasons were relatively short (18 episodes or fewer); and 3. the visual aspects of sets and minis were engaging and helped sort out the action but were not NECESSARY to following along. i don't have the free time or attention span to get invested in an audio-only 100-episode campaign where every episode is like 4 hours long; d20's earliest seasons were very attractive to me for this reason (plus the inventive-for-the-actual-play-genre settings and plots, but this is one thing at least that i do not think d20 has faltered in with its later seasons. the creativity and originality is still great in this regard).

so it became an issue for me, starting around Crown of Candy, when episodes started creeping longer and longer. and then seasons crept longer and longer, like The Seven (sidequests used to be an easily digestible 6 episodes and i liked that). even worse than episodes consistently being over 2.5 hours long i think was that episodes were not a consistent length: the last two episodes of Starstruck Odyssey are under 1.5 and over 3 hours respectively. i understand that a lot of this has to do with the loose and unscripted nature of the storytelling medium, and the cast/editors don't want to break up the flow of the show in inconvenient places. but from my perspective as a viewer, it's kind of exhausting not knowing week to week how much time and energy in advance i'm going to need to dedicate to a new episode of my favorite dnd show to relax and rewind. i'm someone who just does not have the patience to dedicate to anything that long without forewarning, nor do i have the schedule to accommodate that without advanced budgeting of my time and workload. and since one of d20's existing strengths imo is its serialized weekly episode release (increasingly rare in this age of streaming and bingewatching), part of the fun of d20 is watching the brand new episode when it drops every week and reacting to it with everyone else doing the same thing at the same time. when a 3 hour episode drops on a wedesnday night and i have too much shit to do to watch it, and thus i have to wait til the weekend or later to catch up, i can see exactly what i'm missing out on when i watch all my friends on discord or tumblr or whatever watching and reacting to it without me.

i also really miss the structure of the rp-battle-rp-battle episode format, particularly for the mainquest seasons. i think this was an even bigger loss for the show due to covid than the physical minis and sets (which i missed, certainly, during the pandemic seasons, but i think they worked around their absence well enough that it didn't bother me). i'm sure also the more freeform nature of Sophomore Year contributed to this change too but since that was the only full season thus far that was ACTUALLY improvised live to an audience as opposed to being completely shot and edited prior to release, i don't hold it to the same standards of scrutiny as i do the other seasons. anyway, i once again think it comes down largely to a predictability thing for me: you knew, when there was such a pattern to the episodes, exactly what you were getting into in any given week, whether it'd be battle or roleplay. moreover, you knew that each episode was going to wrap itself up in a satisfying way (not necessarily a complete way, but in a satisfying way) that prepped for the next week's episode, which also promised to have a different tone and goal. that variety was important to me, and the predictability. battles and roleplay both get exhausting and difficult to follow (or worse, boring) after too long without the other to break it up. i miss the structure of this pattern (i think started to depart from this format with TUC2 iirc, which is also the first season i watched as it was airing and got the feeling that it was becoming a bit of a slog to watch all the way through).

all of this is criticism, of course, pretty ironic considering that Sophomore Year is still probably my favorite season. but again, livestreamed. they still (mostly) kept their episode length consistent around 2-2.5 hours (finales notwithstanding lol), there was more internal variety within episodes (one 2.5 hour episode wasn't necessarily 2.5 hours straight of just rp or just battle), the gang got split up a lot more which allowed for more variety in storytelling within an episode or an arc, etc. and on top of it, i think that plotwise, they followed up Fantasy High extremely well, introducing/continuing/expanding lore without it feeling out-of-place or retcon-y. i think it having been made still mostly pre-pandemic before a lot of these changes i've been complaining about were fully implemented does link it more closely still with the style of the early seasons i liked so much, but regardless i think Sophomore Year does demonstrate that some of these traits that i don't like about newer seasons, on their own, are not bad. i just don't think they're implemented very well in recent seasons, or at least not well enough to hold my attention and excitement anymore. long episodes aren't inherently bad, but inconsistently long episodes are hard to work around in my life. a lack of a regular rp-battle episode pattern isn't inherently bad, but there needs to be more internal variety to each episode and a satisfying wrap-up to each episode (which may mean simply wrapping up each episode sooner, or it may not).

none of this is even to get into the execution of content in each season. obviously ymmv with personal taste for whether you like any given season's premise or plot beats or whatever, but i remember the many (valid) criticisms emerging surrounding unbalanced character focus and especially racial insensitivity (from the show and from the fans) with certain seasons like TUC2 and Misfits & Magic. not even to mention my own problems with the inclusion of judaism (or lack thereof)/antisemitism in the show, but i have to get to class soon, and don't have time to elaborate on that right now. this post is long enough already, and my issues with the structural elements of the show are just as strong as my criticisms of its representation issues or whatever, plus i think structural elements are easier to understand if you haven't watched every single season because they apply broadly to many seasons, while issues of representation or bad plot/character balance or whatever are only relevant to specific seasons.

#i mean if someone wanted me to elaborate on more plot/character/season/culturally specific criticisms i could #but like. in another post. if someone asked for it #and another time. cause. i have things to do today #sasha speaks #sasha reviews #dimension 20

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