#I just love it when tumblr takes away functions that I use all the time jdsfhjfdhsjhfds

[acosmicbee]

Teddy Bear pt.2

(Not beta read so hopefully there aren't any major typos... Also, this is Tumblr exclusive and written from scratch so I hope you enjoy!

Platonic Yandere Family x Child Reader)

You weren't quite sure what had happened, and it didn't help that no one would tell you. These people-- these strangers-- weren't your family, but they were acting like they were. Dinner had been an uncomfortable affair and you'd spent most of it hiding behind your teddy bear while Stephan tried to make sure you ate.

Emma was chatting with her parents and siblings, occasionally placing a hand on your head or gently chiding you to try eating a little more. But you felt like you could barely keep your food down, anxious as you kept glancing around at all these people you didn't know.

Of course you had liked Emma and Stephan, they'd been so nice to you when you'd met. They'd made you feel comfortable and safe, but they'd also taken advantage of that. They'd used your security against you, to steal you away. Sure they were being nice now, as were the people around them, but you remembered all those times your school had cops come in to talk about kidnappings. You remembered how they'd showed the statistics of all the kids who'd never made it out alive.

You tried to stifle a sniffle in the fur of your bear, staring down at your lap as a tear steamed down your face. Sure your family hadn't been the greatest... but they were still your family. More importantly, would you ever see your grandma again? The woman who'd spent her time to make you a special gift when you had nothing.

Emma frowned down at you, seeming to have noticed your distressed state. She shared a look with Stephan before excusing herself from the table, picking you up as she carried you from the room. You just let her take you, feeling worse as the sound of talking faded away.

Emma was talking to you, quietly cooing and whispering little promises that fell on deaf ears. She carried you into the room you were apparently staying in, setting you on her and Stephan's bed as she kneeled to look up at your face.

"Hey, sweetheart. What's with the tears?" She asked gently, reaching up to brush a tear off your face. "Do you want to lie down, honey? We can take a minute to ourselves if you need that. We don't want to rush you."

You just nodded, letting yourself flop over onto the bed as you lay on your side. All you could think about was your grandma, how you weren't sure if you'd ever get to see her again. You let Emma play with your hair, trying to calm you down as you cried. It didn't take very long before the adrenaline stopped rushing through, your body unable to continue being in fight or flight and still function. You fell asleep on the bed, your tears drying on your face.

—⁺˖°ʚ🧸ɞ°⁺˖—

"...time, honey. They'll be okay, I promise." You heard a voice murmur. Your body felt like it weighed a hundred pounds as you slowly woke up. You were thirsty, which your body had decided was enough reason to rouse you from your much needed sleep.

You slowly sat up, still trying to register your surroundings. The voices around you went quiet as you rubbed your eyes, carefully climbing off the bed. You didn't even make it two steps before you were being cradled in warm arms, a gentle hand stroking your back.

"Hey sweetheart, did you need something?" A voice asked. It took you a second to recognize the person as Stephan, looking at him with sleepy eyes.

"Water..." You said, ignoring him as he cooed at you for being cute and sleepy.

"Of course, love. Emma, could you...?"

"Yeah, I'll go grab them some water." She said, appearing beside him. She smiled down at you, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before disappearing back out of view.

You spent the few minutes before she got back, being gently rocked, tucked against a cozy chest. It almost made you drift off again, but the second you were about to give in and close your eyes a cup of water was passed to you.

You took small sips, finishing the whole cup quickly. Instead of being allowed to go back to bed, you were changed into a soft pair of pajamas and carried into the bathroom to brush your teeth. By the time you were deemed 'ready for bedtime', you were getting fussy.

You were placed onto the air mattress where you'd first woken up instead of the bed, your teddy bear hugged close to you. A fluffy blanket was pulled over your body as your head hit the pillow. You heard the voices start talking softly again but couldn't bring yourself to care enough to listen in as you fell back asleep.

—⁺˖°ʚ🧸ɞ°⁺˖—

"They're just so precious... Did you see their little frown when I made them brush their teeth?" Stephan asked, looking over for the fourth time in ten minutes to make sure you were still comfortably sleeping. Tomorrow Emma's parents were having a kid bed delivered for you, probably along with a whole slew of new clothes, toys and other activities for a kid your age.

"I saw. Hopefully they'll be able to eat a bit more at breakfast. I know they're still adjusting and just need some time but it worried me when they tired themself out like that..." Emma said, smiling as you murmured something incoherent in your sleep. "They're such a good kid... I hope they finally feel the love they've been missing."

"I'm sure they do Em. Have you booked them a ticket for our return flight next week yet?" Stephan asked, yawning as he climbed into bed. Emma cursed under her breath as she grabbed her laptop from her luggage.

"You're a lifesaver Steph. Don't know what I'd do without you." She said, leaning over to kiss him on the cheek. "You go to bed, okay love? I'll get everything sorted out. Love you honey."

"Love you more." Stephan murmured back. Emma turned off the bedside lamp, dimming her computer screen as she navigated booking you a seat between the two of them for when the three of you would head home next week.

—⁺˖°ʚ🧸ɞ°⁺˖—

Emma had been up much longer than she'd expected to be. She'd booked your ticket hours ago, but had then stumbled down an internet rabbit hole regarding childcare. What had started with a simple search about introducing a new kid to a home had led her to some darker corners of the internet.

She was watching a video made by a woman regarding settling a child in after a unanticipated adoption when she heard you stir. She turned on the light, knowing that Stephan could sleep through it, as she climbed out of bed to kneel beside you.

Even in your sleep you looked distressed, your body twisted up into a ball as you let out a soft whine. Emma frowned, reaching out to try and soothe you when you suddenly jolted awake. A strangled cry left you when you saw her before you began to cry.

She gently shushed you, pulling you into her arms as she gently rocked you. You looked conflicted, torn between resisting the woman who kidnapped you or leaning into the novel and warm feeling of comfort she brought you. Eventually, you let yourself relax into her arms, letting her stroke your back as she delicately handled you.

"You're alright sweetheart. Do you want to talk about it, Y/N? I'm here to listen if you wish." Her voice was soft and patient and only served to confuse you more.

"Why are you being nice to me?" You asked through tears. "Why aren't you being mean?! Kidnappers are supposed to be mean!"

A look of hurt flashed across her face for a second, but she coaxed your head to rest against her chest before you could dwell on it. Her nice behavior was so confusing to you. How could this couple who had kidnapped you treat you so much nicer than your parents had? Were you a horrible child if there was a little voice inside of you begging you to behave so you could stay with them?

"Sweetheart," Emma sighed. She gently rubbed your back as she continued to speak. "The reason Stephan and I... adopted you was because we felt you deserved so much better than what you were getting. You deserved to have a life where you were told you were loved every single day. You deserved to wake up each morning with a smile. You were, and are, such a sweet kid but you were being forced out of a childhood."

"B-but you don't know me! I could be bad or just pretending! Maybe I deserved it!" You argued back, the words of your parents echoing through your head. They'd always let you know how bad you were and why they never loved you the way they loved your sister.

Emma's heart broke hearing your words as she pulled you even closer, kissing the top of your head. It took her a minute to find the words she wanted to say and even longer to put aside the idea of tracking down your old parents to teach them a lesson.

"Y/N, sweetheart, no matter how 'bad' a kid is they still deserve love. You could be the worst kid on the planet and still deserve love, but I don't think you are. A bad kid wouldn't have offered a stranger her teddy bear because they were scared. A bad kid wouldn't have been as polite as you've been. You aren't bad, lovely, you were never bad. You were just around people who couldn't appreciate you."

That incited a new wave of tears. Your arms came up to cling to Emma's pajama top, holding her close as you sobbed. You- you weren't bad? You did deserve love? Could she be right? You wanted her to be right. You desperately needed her to be right.

"A-Am I wrong? I don't wanna leave... I don't wanna go back... Is that wrong? Does that make me bad?" You whispered, not even sure if she'd heard you until she pulled you even closer. She just smiled into your hair, kissing the top of your head again.

"Oh sweetheart... Of course you aren't bad. You're allowed to be happy that you got out of a bad situation. You're allowed to be happy that you finally feel loved. You're allowed to feel the way you feel." She said, carefully grabbing your teddy before standing up with you in her arms.

She carried you over to the bed, laying you down next to Stephan's sleeping body. She placed her laptop on the nightstand before climbing in beside you and turning off the light. An arm wrapped around your waist, and you felt someone cuddling you close for the very first time. It was warm...

You decided you liked being held close as you drifted off to sleep.

—⁺˖°ʚ🧸ɞ°⁺˖—

Slowly, over the course of the week you spent with Emma's family, you started to open up. You would let Emma's parents dress you up and buy you toys. You would let her siblings ruffle your hair and twirl you around. Every night you'd find your way in between Emma and Stephan, being held close as they reminded you how much they loved you.

It was only on the day before you left that you approached Emma's father with a request. You'd whispered it into his ear, your eyes lighting up when he responded. You'd hugged him tightly and Stephan had smiled watching as his soon to be father-in-law hugged you back with a chuckle.

Later that day you handed him a slip of paper. He didn't look at it, just tucked it into the inner pocket of his jacket. It was only later, while your new grandmother was giving you a luxurious bubble bath, that he pulled them aside.

"Y/N wanted me to send this to her grandmother." He said bluntly, pulling out the piece of paper. "I'm ready to follow your lead on whether or not to send it. They're your kid."

Emma and Stephan took a moment to read over the letter, murmuring between each other. Eventually they came to an agreement, turning back to Alexi. "You can send the letter."

"Are you sure?" He asked, taking the piece of paper back.

"She needs to get it off her chest. Please forward any response to my address back home." Emma said, holding Stephan's hand. The sound of your laughter echoed through the house, a testament to how far you'd come since you'd first arrived.

They knew that everything would be okay.

—⁺˖°ʚ🧸ɞ°⁺˖—

"I'm looking for a Miss Aurelia." A man dressed in a nice suit said. Aurelia wasn't in the mood, wanting to go back to mourning her lost grandchild.

"I'm not interested." She murmured, going to shut the door when the man stopped her, holding out a letter. She looked at him confused before taking the envelope. "What is this?"

"This is a letter Miss Y/N wrote for you." He said, watching the way her eyes widened. She instantly opened the envelope, pulling out the letter written in your childish scrawl.

Your grandma held the letter close, tears streaming down her face. She'd thought she'd lost you forever when her idiot son had turned up, talking about how they'd been given a large sum of money in return for your adoption. She'd yelled at him, disowning him and refusing him any entry to her home. But now... now she knew you were safe and sound.

Hi Grandma!

I just wanted to let you know that I'm okay. I'm living with these super nice people named Emma and Stephan. They're taking good care of me and make me feel the same way you do. I don't need to do all the chores and they make sure to tell me that they love me everyday. I'm sorry that I didn't get to see you, but Emma said maybe next time we can go visit you! That way you can still knit Teddy a sweater! I still have him, he's all safe with no rips or tears at all!

I love you the most grandma! Don't forget about me!

-Y/N

"If you wish to write a response, you can send it here." The man said, handing her a card with an address printed on it. "Have a good day, Miss Aurelia."

Your grandmother never stopped crying as she closed the door and locked it. Not as she walked over to the mantle where she'd turned all your pictures around to flip them the right way again. Not as she finally picked up her knitting needles, which she hadn't touched since she'd heard the news, and started on the sweater for your bear.

She hoped your new family were treating you with the love you deserved. More than that, she hoped that you'd be able to see each other as soon as possible. You deserved the world, and she was glad it seemed like someone was finally giving it to you.

[thewandererh]

what if why we didn’t see the doctor’s primary black-cloaked vessel ingame is because it’s his last resort? what if it’s where his heart is stored? or even where all the last copies of all his vital organs are kept safe?

an active consciousness can still stem from a backup of his brain, which his primary vessel holds. so, after his physical brain goes belly up (literally😭) the network of transmitting consciousness to each of his bots is still active. just transferred to a weaker method.

following the “murder” of dr harley sawyer in chapter 4, perhaps he scrambles back to this old vessel whereever it is. maybe it’s been neglected, a plan B dangerously collecting dust, or it’s sitting pristine in a sterile room on life support. nevertheless, harley finds himself in it after croaking his “last words” mid-transfer, and struggles to breathe. he forgot about this vessel. he’d cast it aside because it held the scars of his initial transfer into machine and the containment that followed. it was his first body. and it was so weak. but now it is his last chance.

however, he’s not properly adjusted to the whole having organs thing, and this vessel needs to be properly taken care of. so with bated breath and the struggle of calming his mind, he summons one of his metal corpses from his brain’s tomb. it takes a few agonizing minutes as it arrives to wherever he is, but eventually it’s close enough that he can actively switch bodies with it. consciousness transferral relies on proximity (this is why we only see the bots around his brain ingame).

revived and disoriented, the doctor must now look after himself. the fact of being reduced to this husk eats away at every atom of his being, but he’s simply too weak. he failed. he failed and he’ll be killed for it. but he’s not afraid.

when the splitting headaches cease and he gets used to being alive he can kill something again.

soon, but not yet.

4/19/25 edit : THIS AU NOW HAS A SIDEBLOG! https://www.tumblr.com/screws-of-sawyer headcanons, fics, art!!

…

…

info ramble & sillies under cut!

au idea, ayo?? early titles are ‘mechanized-mind’ or ‘inside-the-mind-of-harley’ or even ‘dry-bones’ but i’m still brainstorming X]. i love putting my characters through emotional agony <33 but this time it’s an au of an existing character i have to analyze to get right so that’ll be fun. now for the drawing, i really like both medical concepts and making stuff up so maybe only some of the function would actually work, but i do not care. the idea was that harley’s primary vessel had a more meshy, detachable plate in his chest to give room for his heart and probably-disproportionately-sized lungs. here that plate is removed in order to help his heart beat. tons of other tubes are wired into his ventilation vents to keep him running to. my running idea for why the sarley hawyer (clone bot, aka secondary vessel) here doesn’t have a cloak is because maybe he had to take it off due to contamination. or it got snagged on the way here. but honestly i didn’t want to cover up the cool anatomy of my neat design i’ve been playing with, so he is naked once again 😔

this was the big flipaclip harley piece i mentioned in this post while trying to animate something. this idea arose instead, and slowly came to fruition as i found an elaborate way to color while listening to some lethal company and ppt 3 & 4 vids. pen pressure is really new to me and i’m on my knees thanking it for this neat coloring texture and technique i will probably never use again 🛐😌🫶 thank you apple pencil ilysm

anyways, here’s some funny wip shots, and general doctor sillies i found today!! ^_^ it’s been another doctor day

once again, astralspiff is a very cool guy guys 🗣️🔥🔥

but alas. adios amigos 😵‍💫🫡 goedenacht!

[timeflow]

good evening reddit users, welcome to the website. not seen one of these that tells you how to make this website bearable so here goes

starting off with dashboard settings you want to turn off endless scrolling (it slows down the website after a while of scrolling), turn off shorten long posts because one of the main things about this website is the total lack of a character limit (as an alternative to this setting, you can press j to skip to the next post on the dashboard if the current one is kind of long). turning on timestamps is convenient because it allows you to check when a post was made (don't get me wrong: this website absolutely LOVES reblogging old posts, but there are times when it's worth checking if a post has very old news in it)

turn off best stuff first right away. one of the main reasons cited for joining tumblr is because "there is no algorithm". this is not entirely true, we have one but we routinely turn off anything algorithmic that staff adds. turning off best stuff first means your dashboard will be reverse chronological no matter what, and turning off based on your likes and stuff in your orbit will get rid of the rest of the algorithmically-recommended content that appears on your dashboard

following tags is nice because you will occasionally see posts with tags you follow sprinkled into your dashboard. this is considered good because it's almost always recent, I personally recommend turning on include followed tag posts and just following a bunch of random tags that you think could be interesting (characters, media, topics, whatever)

this one's a more personal thing but I would absolutely turn off any community labels because tumblr staff has recently been just putting a bunch of random posts under this despite being entirely sfw. if you ACTUALLY want to filter content, then go to filtered tags:

unlike the community labels which are put arbitrarily by staff, tags are put on by the actual users and so you can MUCH more reliably filter out content you don't want to see by putting filtered tags. this also works for any kind of content unlike the community labels, meaning you can just filter out stuff that you don't want to see (a particular character, a particular piece of media, a certain topic, anything you want really)

turn on custom theme immediately. the standard view of tumblr.com/url will give people who are not logged in a forced login wall, meanwhile url.tumblr.com will not. by doing this you also get access to your post archive at url.tumblr.com/archive, which lets you look through your posts more easily (the search function is awful). the main benefit of this, however, is that you get to have a custom look to your blog: going to edit theme brings up a menu that allows you to customize your css, add pages to your tumblr blog, etc. all very useful stuff

it's also worth taking the time to consider whether or not you leave your liked posts and list of blogs you follow public (most people have likes turned off, following is also commonly turned off but I personally don't care about others seeing who I follow)

turn off the let people blaze your posts. blaze basically allows you to pay money to show a post to a random group of people by paying money, suffices to say that allowing others to blaze your posts without your consent will inevitably lead to one of your personal posts getting blazed by some prick and now hundreds of people have seen it

asks are one of the main ways of interacting with blogs so absolutely turn them on. whether you allow anons is your choice, anonymity allows people to say nice things without feeling embarrassed about how everyone knows who said that, but it also allows people to send hateful stuff with no consequence.

submissions are like whatever. I personally leave them on but in my 5 years of having this blog I've been submitted to twice.

to close off this post I'll leave my personal thoughts on reblog etiquette:

reblogging is great. reblog the fuck out of anything. does the post amuse you slightly? reblog it. go wild

that being said please don't put anything in your reblogs unless it's like a really important comment. your comment will be immortalized forever if someone reblogs the post from you and on popular posts I have to constantly go back a couple years to get rid of an annoying comment like "LOL THIS IS SO FUNNY" because that person didn't realize that their addition was wholly unnecessary

if you DO want to add something to say your thoughts on the post in a quiet voice that doesn't get permanently added onto the original, consider talking in the tags of your reblog. this is considered nicer since when the post is reblogged from you your tags are not going to stick around. there is also this process known as "peer review" in which if your tags are sufficiently funny one of your followers (or sometimes a random person browsing the notes of the post) will screenshot/copy and paste your tags into a reblog, which is a much more natural way of having your comment added into the post

tags are also nice to use or organizational purposes. clicking on a post with a certain tag on your blog will show you every post with that tag on your blog allowing you to find posts later, alternatively you can go to url.tumblr.com/archive/tagged/[insert tag here] to a similar effect.

that's all I have to say on this subject. have fun on our glorious website

edit: oh yeah also unfollow staff. it will make you look normal 👍

[thefrogman]

Back in the olden days, if you used the "keep reading" function on a Tumblr-dot-com post, it would

not get very many notes.

At all.

I am not sure exactly why.

I think people hated pressing an extra thing.

But maybe it was also a psychological phenomenon where, given the choice, they were unwilling to trust me with their time.

But if I sucked them in with a good story or a compelling image, they would get serious FOMO.

When I created a super high effort post-of-length I would get comments like, "This was way too long but before I realized it I was reading the last sentence."

That was a really good feeling.

I used to do tests to figure out the best posting strategies and I think I figured out you'd lose about 90% of your notes if you did a "keep reading" post.

So that notion was ingrained in my brain again and again from when I was very note-obsessed and I have since avoided the "keep reading" option almost like a conditioned response.

Just seeing that squiggly line appear still induces a Pavlovian fear.

But that was probably a decade ago and I did a new experiment. My story about replacing my mailbox did reasonably well with a strategically clickbaity "keep reading."

This was a promising result due to the fact that some people like to send me hate for writing a lengthy post.

I recently got a death threat for writing too much, which was a fun reminder of my M&M days (I melted men's rights activists' brains with a poorly worded analogy and they launched a years long harassment campaign).

It seems in present-era-Tumblr-dot-com many more people prefer pressing an extra thing rather than scrolling a bunch on their smartphone. The collective behavior has changed. And maybe I don't need to use tricks and running gags in order to get folks to "keep reading".

Unfortunately I started writing that ring light post a few months ago so I wasn't able to include that in the experiment. But I am going to try using the keep reading function in the future and as long as the average number of folks that usually read my longer posts continue to read my posts, that will be the standard approach.

I also tag these posts with "long post" so you can flag that if you wish.

While I am no longer in the audience-building phase of my Tumblr career, these essays and stories and educational posts take a considerable amount of time and effort to create, so I do want to make sure everyone who wants to read them is able to. But posts without hearts and reblogs can quickly die a gruesome algorithmic death. Even my most ardent followers would tell me things were not showing up on their dash. (I think replies help mitigate that, so if you like a long post, you can help with engagement.)

The collective noun is a "business" of ferrets.

Do you want to see a business of ferrets ready to do some business?

KEEP READING

I love writing and it is a huge catharsis for me. And I love sharing any knowledge I feel like I have the earned expertise to speak on with authority (technology, photography, light, fun ferret facts, etc). I wish I had the energy to be a photography teacher, but long posts on Tumblr are probably the best I can do for now.

I know my posts are super long, but I try to make them as fun and informationally dense as I possibly can. I don't like wasting people's time if I can avoid it. Though maybe I should trust my follower's attention span a bit more. I have this fear that if I am not constantly entertaining, people will click away or unfollow.

I think a good business for a business of ferrets would be selling pool noodles that look like ferrets.

So as long as I get roughly the same amount of notes I will do the keep reading. And then maybe people can lay off on the mean comments and occasional requests to end my own life because I bloviated about soft light.

100% true ferret fact..

If you ask a ferret what their business is, they will crawl on your shoulder and whisper in your ear...

[yandere-daydreams]

Idk if Sex doll!au Alhaitham has been discussed yet…(honestly it probably has been, but it was likely during the times when I wasn’t keeping up to date with this blog. Tumblr’s shitty search function doesn’t help with finding out either.)

Anyway, I’d like to share my thoughts about it, if that’s okay.

-I think sex doll! Alhaitham would mostly be for professional and academic purposes. He’s not reccomended for younger grades, mostly just colleges.

-His general purposes are office/administrative related. Especially since he’s a “scribe”, he’s especially good at file management and documentation. I don’t think it be uncommon to see him assisting librarians alongside a Lisa model…or maybe helping archeologists/museums workers catalogue info about artifacts.

-I think his way of not doing anything more than what his job asks of him would stay even as an Android. I know that as a product, he’d probably wouldn’t be given leeway or time off like that; but the thought of someone trying to assign tasks to Alhaitham that are outside his designated role being ignored by him is funny to me.

-if Alhaitham is acting as a companion doll in someone’s home, I can only imagine that he’s incredibly annoying. Alhaitham normally chooses to ignore social etiquette, and as an android it has to be even worse.

tw - unhealthy relationships, slight infantilization, slight stalking.

i think he'd absolutely be marketed toward researchers as a sort of lab assistant who acts like you're the lab assistant, if that makes sense. he specializes in archival work and bureaucracy, but he's a bit of a jack-of-all-trades and it's not uncommon to see him alongside more outdoorsy androids like cyno and albedo when you're out doing fieldwork. he's also especially loved by students for his,,, strict attitude toward studying. you wouldn't think the ability to say 'i'm not touching your dick until you finish your thesis' would be such a popular feature in a literal sex doll, but, y'know, what does it for you does it for you, i guess.

you're not a student, though, or a researcher - just a librarian for a big enough branch to warrant writing off a helper android as a business expense. you probably could've gotten away with bringing on lisa or nahida, but you were able to find a second-hand alhaitham for a price you couldn't turn up and figured dealing with the occasional comment on your organization skills or catalog maintenance was better than wasting an extra thousand dollars on a robot that'll be reading to children twice a week. he works well enough, too, even if it does take a few days for him to get used to the idea that you won't be using him for his, uh, intended purposes. it just doesn't feel right, considering he's basically one of your employees - something he's surprisingly indifferent about, considering how judgemental he's rumored to be about, well, everything.

you do take him home at night, though, since the alternative is leaving him in a dark building alone all night and trying to live with the guilt. he's a polite enough houseguest, even if does occasionally let out a disapproving huff at your admittedly less-than-steller diet, but he does have a few... bugs, you guess, for lack of something better to call his little lapses in decorum. he's overstepped his boundaries a few times - taking pens and reports out of your hands because you 'have a tendency to mess these things up', checking on you in the middle of the night when he's supposed to be charging - but he'll never indulge your attempts to confront him, just clicking his tongue and shaking his eyes. sometimes, he brings up your stress levels, mentions off-handedly that orgasms are known to reduce overall tension, but denies that he's done anything wrong when you ask him to change his behavior. he's good at that - justifying himself, bending his protocols until he can get away with practically anything. you'd be lying if you said you weren't a little worried, knowing the awful rumors that spread about second-hand andriods, about how demeaning alhaitham can be when he's supposed to be little more than a platonic assistant.

you'd be lying if you said you weren't a little worried that, one day, he'd find a way to justify disregarding your autonomy altogether.

[nightlyrequiem]

hello sweetheart! have you ever thought about writing valeria x fem!reader who is prone to crying? this idea suddenly came to me after spending a lot of time in my day reading and re-reading your valeria x reader fanfics. i don’t know if you still take requests, but if not, consider this a writing idea for the future X3

(btw, i love you and your works so so muchhhhhh! your tumblr is clearly a paradise for valeria garza fangirls 😭💕💕💕)

Sweetheart? Oh my, I'm swooning!

I love it when people say they re-read my fics, makes me feel all warm inside. Yes stranger on the internet! Fuel my ego! Give me that instant dopamine hit! As someone who cries a lot, I needed to write this

I love you too, anonymous asker! Doing my civic duty of providing Valeria content

(Name has nothing to do with the fictional creatures.)

Tags/Warnings: WLW, Emotional Hurt, Comfort (Kind Of.), Valeria is Mean but regrets it, Sensitive reader

Weeping Angel

You're crying again. Valeria had returned home later than usual and when you asked about it, her tone was slightly different. Not as soft as usual. It doesn't take much to make you cry. Saltine tears swiftly well up in your eyes as you fall silent. Valeria feels frustrated. She is someone who rarely cries, who is used to being around stronger people. She still isn't sure how to handle you and your endless fountain of tears.

You turn your head and wipe at your eyes with your sleeve. Valeria sighs and rubs her face, trying to reel in her temper. She has to remind herself that you're more delicate than she is. You aren't trying to manipulate her with crocodile tears, you're just truly, very sensitive. She both hates and loves that about you.

"Look, I told you I have a lot to do." She says, attempting to soften her voice but even she can hear the irritation seeping through her words. Valeria just doesn't understand how a grown adult is unable to regulate their feelings.

"...Okay." You reply passively, voice thick with sadness.

Valeria wishes you were stronger.

"Stop crying." She says sternly. "I hate it when you do that. I didn't even do anything, why are you trying to make me feel bad?" Valeria knows that's not what you're trying to do, and she knows she's only making things worse. You look at her with wide, wet eyes.

"Why are you yelling at me?"

"Why do you take everything so personally? I'm not yelling." she grits out.

Your lips twitch down into a frown. It would be almost comical if she didn't have to deal with you and your dramatic tears.

"God. I can't deal with this." She continues. Venting all her frustrations that have been slowly growing like a malignant tumor. "I don't think you understand how hard it is to deal with you. I can't say anything without offending you." You just stand there and take it. Tears running rivers down your cheeks. "It's like walking on eggshells around you. It's exhausting."

"Don't talk to me like that." You say. frowning at her.

"'Don't talk to me like that'?" Valeria growls, getting up in your face. Out of the corner of her eye she can see your hands shaking. She knows confrontation isn't your strong suit. "You're allowed to whine and bitch but the second I do it I'm the bad guy?"

You struggle to find the words to respond and for the first time, Valeria feels a small tingle of guilt. Not enough to stop though, Valeria has never found it easy to back down. She's just so tired of your tears. Of always having to console you. You can barely function. You spill a drink and cry, if you don't succeed at something right away, you cry. The stray dogs on the street make you cry.

"Just get out of my face, okay? Go be somewhere else because I can't stand you right now." Valeria says dismissively. Turning her back to you.

She hears your hiccupping breathes disappear down the hall. She leans against the counter and puts her head in her hands. She doesn't like fighting with you, and she doesn't like making you cry, but it's practically inevitable with how volatile the both of you are. You always bring down the mood, Valeria can never truly relax around you because she's always expecting something to set you off. Sometimes she feels more like your therapist than your girlfriend.

As hours pass by, her anger cools into quiet sadness. Valeria is less upset by your crying then she is by the fact that she can't ever seem to help. She can't ever find the right words to comfort you. Valeria is frustrated with herself because she doesn't understand. Valeria has never cried over a spilled drink, or a single off-handed joke at her expense, or when she failed at something.

What she does understand, is that she loves you. Valeria sighs and stands from the couch. Heading to the bedroom. she gently opens the door, seeing you curled up in bed. Your side slowly rising and falling with each breath. She sits down next to you. Looking over your tear-stained face. Your eyes are closed, having worn yourself out with your crying. Valeria isn't good at apologies, but she reaches out a hand and pets your hair. Smoothing her fingers over the strands. You're not awake to hear the awkward, murmured apology falling from her lips. You cry over everything, but Valeria doesn't want to be among the reasons. She may not understand you, but she doesn't need to. She just needs to be there for you.

[timbitshockey]

have you read llb’s hockey romance book?? do you have any thoughts 👀

i’ve seen a few screenshots! hockey romance isn’t a genre i particularly enjoy but i’d been kind of interested by the way she’d been angling her book as a more different and more real take on it — unfortunately the screenshots i’ve seen and the reviews i’ve read seem to suggest it’s really nothing different and fits perfectly smoothly into the genre, which i guess ymmv if that’s a good thing or not to you! very funny for her to name the main couple lucy and jaylen though. gotta hand it to her on that.

i actually have some wider & less focused thoughts on lexi, her place in fandom, and why the reaction to the book has been the way it is, but i’m gonna put those under a cut to save y’all the time

so to preface this i want to say i like lexi and i think she’s funny and i appreciate the insider access information she’s shared with the internet at large! okay!!! don’t come at me! i think she’s great!!!

the problem i have with her isn’t with HER, specifically, but with her type of fandom involvement, and why it seems to have backfired on her with this book. she has tried to do what many, many before her have also tried, which is to be what i have christened “the fandom girlie on the inside.” she’s one of us, she just happens to be more involved, has more access! think, like, brittany broski, or taylor swift’s tumblr, or when olivia rodrigo was a big swiftie. i think being the fandom girlie on the inside is really appealing to people, especially those already IN a fandom, because why should things change just because i got cast on a disney show or get sent to red carpets or whatever?

i think the problem is that the fandom girlie on the inside is always exciting at first and then quickly becomes, for lack of a better word, cringe, because fandom is unfortunately for fans and once you enter a higher eschelon than “fan” it’s basically impossible to maintain connection. when lexi made a post about the trade deadline being a time when fans are terrified for their emotional support fourth liners and don’t you dare take our princess away etc to me it didn’t feel like a genuine expression from just one of us stressing about the deadline, it felt like someone who saw one of “our” posts and turned it into a tiktok. there’s always a level of separation.

the fandom girlie on the inside can backfire in a few different ways depending on context — olivia rodrigo didn’t want to be known as “the swiftie who was also a singer”, taylor swift became so big that her tumblr couldn’t operate the way it had before where it was a more private avenue for expression, etc — but i think lexi seems to be on the same path brittany broski is, which is, like, the feeling of: you’re not one of us anymore!

if lexi made a tumblr i would block her immediately, and not because i don’t like her, but because i’m blogging for our little corner of hockey fandom and she’s not a member of it, no matter if she knows the right jokes or calls players babygirl or whatever else. fandoms, especially rpf-heavy ones, need that layer of separation between the fandom and the real life spaces to function properly. it’s why you see tons of posts about people not wanting their stuff shared on twitter — we don’t want this in a place the Real People might see it. we don’t want the Real People to engage with it. and lexi is, unfortunately, a Real Person. it’s the same uncomfortable feeling i was getting with the kraken’s booktok debacle a couple seasons ago, or whenever teams’ social media pages do a little wink-nudge at shipping or whatever. we’re doing this for us and you’re not us!

if tomorrow i woke up and, like, idk, po joseph had slid into my dms and declared unwavering love for me and we ran away to vegas and eloped, i would not continue to post here the way i do now, and if i did, it would be weird, and you all would not like it. you know? you’d be right to!

anyway all that to say is i think lexi’s book is fine but i think most of the negative reaction she’s getting is from people who expected her to write “like a fan” ie like fanfiction writers write, and she doesn’t. she writes like a hockey romance writer, which is the group she’s in. i’m not saying it’s better or worse, but it is DIFFERENT, and i think that difference is what is sort of pushing people into realizing that lexi is not our fandom girlie on the inside. i would not be surprised to see the fandom tide start turning against her over the next few months and see the general reaction to her fandom-esque posts go from delight to cringe, but who knows! i have been wrong before!

[thesweetcurse]

The inner kingdom

There is one pitfall in this community that could literally take your whole joy of living and existing away. When we found out about the law of assumption, we learned the importance of our imagination. Before I knew about the law, imagination was nothing but fiction or fantasy. I wasn‘t aware of its power. One day, I asked myself: ‘‘If I didn‘t know that Imagination creates reality, if I didn’t know about the law of assumption at all, would I still have a hard time imagining without feeling like I‘m delusional or lying to myself?‘‘ No, I would simply imagine. I wouldn‘t have second thoughts or doubts because why would I? I mean I‘m simply imagining whatever I want, right? But when I joined this community, I started to misuse my imaginative power. All of a sudden, I imagined to change my outer world. I imagined to get something. My whole focus was laying on the outside. How funny is that, to do something inwardly only to change it outwardly?

I know that I‘m not alone on this. I know that there are plenty of souls in this community that fell in the same ‘‘imagine to get‘‘-trap. But I‘m here to assure you, my love, that you can easily get out of that unhealthy circle. Just like I did. This is kinda going to be a success story, but I feel like telling you also about my failures will prevent you from doing the same, or it will even help you find out, what you‘re doing ‘‘wrong‘‘. Because there is one thing that I can promise you: If you are suffering along your law of assumption journey, you‘re doing someting wrong. Please don't get it twisted. It's not about feeling good all the time. It's not about being happy 24/7. It's simply about fulfilling. It's about being content with having it within because you are that powerful. It's about realizing that you don't need to have it on the outside to feel it. How wonderful is that? I mean the feeling is so magical when you apply it correctly. If not, you will suffer just like I did. Maybe you are suffering right now.

In my case, the law got frustrating when I only imagined to get something in the 3d. It made me sick to the point that my life became terrible. I got everything I DID NOT want in the 3d. The things that I wanted for myself became other peoples reality. I thought I was in some sort of psychological thriller playing an unlucky character and God wants to test me along the process. I literally thought that everyone was happy winning in life but me.

I asked myself: Why is life getting worse when I imagine only the best for myself? Why am I experiencing the opposite of what I want? Literally the opposite. Well, I'm telling you what I did wrong: I was wasting my time and energy. I imagined because I was hungry for my desires and left my imagination starving even more. I felt empty after giving myself my desires in imagination. And so l became miserable, jealous, sad and I started to gain weight. My social life wasn't fun as it used to be and I didn't want so see anyone.I couldn't sit alone with myself anymore. I constantly had to stimulate myself with my tv, my phone or ipad. I overconsumed LOA content. I probably have read every LOA post on tumblr. My daydreams became my escape from life (Maladaptive Daydreaming). I was no longer functioning and my life went downhill.

One day, I sat with myself. It was difficult and I couldn't stand it. I was so close to grab my ipad and distract my lazy ass when I asked myself this: Do I sincerely believe in the Law of Assumption? Like at all? Do I really believe that all of this is true? Do I really believe that it's a universal law or do l believe that some people succeed and some don't? Sincerely, NO! I didn't believe in all of this at all! I had zero faith, not even a tiny bit. All the time, I was just desperately hoping. I was like "okay, no way that I get what I want but let's give it a try. I don't even want to try beause I'm sure it won't work but maybe one day my desires will decide to show up in my 3d, so let me imagine to prove myself that all of this actually works." This was such a wrong and harmful approach. It messed up my mental health.

So the answer to all questions was no. At that point I had two options: I'm either going to live my life like I used to before LOA or I'm going to read source properly and understand the law. I chose the last option, because even though I had no faith, I knew I was meant to live my life how I want it. I was meant to become the best version of myself, to get the best looks, to get the wealthy family, to get the best grades and so on. I read Neville and Edward, and I also read posts from tumblr that were really helpful. Aphroditeapprenticee was the one that opened my eyes. After reading her posts, I finally understood the law. It was never about getting, it was about being. Being doesn‘t mean seeing it with your eyes or touching it with your hands. It‘s not about being it in the 3d. It‘s about Self. It‘s an internal change. You are not doing, getting or hoping, you are only being. Remember how I said somewhere in the beginning of this post that giving my inner self what I want made me bitter? Well, of course that‘s what I feel when I hoped that having it in the 4d means I can also have it in the 3d. I didn‘t even care about my imagination because the end goal was my physical world. And when I didn‘t see it in my 3d I was expecting the opposite since what I want hasn’t shown up. My love, we can‘t change the 3d. And it is not our duty to do so. It never was. Manifesting was never about the outer world. If you want something in the outer world, than change it with your outer self. You want to lose weight? Okay than go to the gym and eat healthy food. You want to become rich? Study hard, find a high paying job and get that bag. You want a relationship? Ask somebody out. You want to become the best version of yourself? Than work step by step towards that version.

But I didn‘t want it this way. I did not want to work so hard for my desires. I didn‘t want to study hard. I wanted to be so smart, that I don’t have to study at all. I wanted to be naturally intelligent. I wanted an old money lifestyle but I didn‘t want to work for years only to live that lifestyle when I‘m old.

Do you understand, I wanted it all now. And who can have all of it at this exact time? Your I AM, your inner self, the one inside you, living in imagination. Because your true self lives in the world of imagination (and stays there!!), it can have anything. Imagination is unconditional. What changed everything for me was looking at imagination from this perspective: We know consciousness/imagination is the only reality, right? We know that 4d=3d. But I got everything I wanted when I said to my self that my 4d is not my 3d. Please bear with me I know it sounds confusing and you don‘t have to do it like me but seeing my imagination as a place that doesn‘t reflect, stopped me from imagining to get something in the 3d. When I imagined, I did it just to feel good. I saw my inner world as one reality in which I‘m god (which is actually true) and then there was my outer world, also a reality on its own. And since I‘m god in my inner world, I could give myself anything I wanted there. I felt so fulfilled because my focus was on being the person I want to be in consciousness. I shamelessly lived in my imagination which was so easy since I no longer believed that 3d reflects 4d. I didn‘t have to wait, I didnt have to hope, because in imagination, everything just is. The burden to change the 3d was completely gone. I was simply imagining to fulfill my hearts desires. I did not expect anything.

Don‘t worry. Imagination still creates reality wether I‘m believing it or not. It‘s an unchangeable fact. But for me, it was easier when I lived by the analogy that my 3d does not reflect my 4d because now, there is nothing to achieve. I no longer used my imagination as a tool to get something, I recognized it as my only true reality. I indentified with my inner self who lives there and gave myself everything I wanted. What happened after that? It showed up in my 3d. From now on, my only priority is to fulfill the inner man. Consciousness is the only reality. It is not a tool to get something, it is the end!

Very important note: I don‘t want to cause any separation. I know I‘m talking about 3d/4d but it‘s all consciousness. When you identify with your inner being, you are not creating a second self or an alter ego. You are identifying with your true self. The Self, that has been there since you were born. When you are fulfilling the inner self, put the 3d out of equation okay my love? The materialization is just a bonus. It’s nothing more. The cause lies in Consciousness. To really accept my Imagination as the only reality, I had to mentally block out the fact that it reflects on the outside because my focus would have been purely on the outside. You don‘t have to do that. The only thing I want you to take with yourself is this: Imagination is not a tool, it is reality. You are not doing to get something on the outside, you fulfill within and that‘s it.

It‘s not: I want money -> I grant my wish in imagination -> somewhere in the 3d it will show up (state of waiting) ❌

It’s: I want money -> I grant my wish in imagination -> I‘m fulfilled that‘s the end congrats✅

It‘s that easy because you are not creating anything, you are not changing the outside. The outside cannot be changed. You are changing Self and Self is not bound to objects. Self does not need proof or confirmation.

[omegastation]

I've seen a comment that has been on my mind a lot lately, that the fandom was dead and that there was some gatekeeping. And to be honest, I have no idea if it's true or not and I want to reflect on it.

I've been away for two years, and for sure Tumblr is different. It's not about people, because they are always lovely fans no matter what. I also don't think I have nostalgia goggles telling me "things were better back then" lol I think it's just that Tumblr, for all its flaws, used to have more public fandom discussions. For better or worse, because posting a reply could encourage discussions that were better left alone - but now it seems like nothing is really public or fandom-wide. It's no longer the norm. Replies are left in the post itself so you have less reblogs with discussions. It's very self contained, which, in my humble opinion, might lose a bit of a sense of community.

The main tag itself used to be filled, and now it's not, clearly because a lot of people aren't active anymore. But it's not just that? I find that I discover more posts using the search function, so I'm always a bit confused about how people tag or intend their posts to be found. Maybe it's just me, but it's unclear to me. And I'm at fault too, I've been very intent on not tagging the main tag for a while, and I don't know why. It's not like I'm hiding, but it felt like my playthrough ramblings didn't belong there. Which is ridiculous, because I wouldn't feel that way about posts like this made by other people. I would want to find those in the tag.

I have a feeling a lot more discussions are now happening on Discord, which is not for me. I don't have the mental capacity for now to check a server every day, see new messages and reply. I tried and it's too much. I would feel the same about fandom boards, though they're less instant, so who knows.

Then you have other apps, which don't always encourage discussions. I've been trying to find vids on TikTok, some are great, but the algorithm fed me a lot of ranking companions type of vids with character bashing so I just paused the whole thing.

Then the gatekeeping, I don't know. I think I learned a lot and matured a bit, so I hope my own behavior in fandom is better and more chill than it used to be. But if I am gatekeeping one way or another, you have to tell me. I mean it. Just flat out tell me and explain, because I would never try to be like this on purpose, and I would need to know what I'm doing wrong to do better.

Lately there have been some DA fans who are experiencing ME for the first time and I'm happy for them. There's a lot of joy in discovering this universe, and I would hate for anyone, me included, to take that away from them.

I'm happy when I get to fill the queue, when people are involved, when there are discussions, when we have fun. That's what I want for Appreciation Weeks, even if I know it will be smaller than other years. It's in a few days and I would hate for anyone not to participate because they worry about how they will be received. If there are ways I can make it more welcoming, tell me!

[barrenclan]

I think that cormorantpaw is just father by the front bottoms but turned into a bisexual cat

I mean, that's not inaccurate.

I have this dream that I am hitting my dad with a baseball bat And he is screaming and crying for help And maybe halfway through, it has more to do with me killing him Then it ever did protecting myself

As soon as I come, you will probably forget my name I hope I fall asleep at the wheel and crash my car on the ride home Or I could just stay here

Haha, a Spongebob song. I worked that show last summer so I've heard these songs a lot. I like the idea, though!

Stay away from the future (Stay away... stay away from the future) (The end is coming, the end is coming!) No point in making plans (No point in making plans) It's all deranged (The end is coming, the end is coming!) (It's all deranged...) No control (No control...) (The end is coming, the end is coming! The end. is. coming!)

It doesn't seem to have been! The music tag is quite long at this point so it's pretty hard to find old songs.

When life loses meaning, there doesn't need to be a reason There doesn't need to be a reason, there doesn't need to be a reason

When you're stuck in this position It's like training for the wrong conditions You've been training for the wrong conditions

Aw gosh, that makes me a little bit sad. Beautiful song, though. I can hear her as a good voice claim for Slugpelt, too.

Any place is better Starting from zero, got nothing to lose Maybe we'll make something Me, myself, I got nothing to prove

You got a fast car I got a plan to get us out of here I been working at the convenience store Managed to save just a little bit of money Won't have to drive too far Just 'cross the border and into the city You and I can both get jobs And finally see what it means to be living

Thanks, I'm glad you like the comic! I'll check out the album.

Ooh, spooky!

Don't cry when lanterns fade Soon we'll be awakened But it breaks my heart to say No one will save you now

Listen closely for your sister's footsteps Lest you fade here all alone I have never seen a night this haunting In these streets of blood and bone

Wow, I'm honored to be the sponsor for your Tumblr account! I like this song for Cormorantpaw.

I was lost Calling out for someone just to come And show me love Teach me how to function as a modern man

Every night talking in my sleep to tell you That I lied and I was just pretending to keep Holding out for someone better

Very cool! And very Rainhaze and Ranger, or maybe early Prowl and Deepdark.

I made a post about this, a long time ago. Here it is:

Yeah, I can see it!

Pulling it up From the wet ground I couldn't stop Had to find out

Picking the scar I know it's the wrong call It won't bring the relief I know that I long for Some things are best left to rot Some things are best left to rot

I'm always taking song recommendations! It's like, at least 30% of my inbox at any given point in time.

Coyote I'm treading water Don't lead me Straight to the slaughter 

He's watching under the silver light  He's stalking now for a time that's right

[m-to-z-andbackto-m]

No you don't understand, it's not just a hyperfixation, IT'S LITERALLY THE REASON I'M FUNCTIONING 😭

I don't like staying hungry or eating when I'm not sure if I'm hungry or bored because Horror exists, he's been through a famine, tf am I doing???

I get upset about my hypersomnia and I try really hard to not to let it happen because many skeles are associated with narcolepsy

I'm pretty sure consuming skeleton content cured my depression over a few years???

God, I'm literally so dependent on them, I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THO!!!

I try to avoid toxic behaviors when I can identify them, and it's easier to because Nightmare is a toxic guy canonically, I've consumed enough content to know what's right and wrong in the long run

On the other end, seeing content where one or more of them gets comfort helps me navigate some situations because generally I'm not amazing at giving comfort

They also have me think about my philosophy and general beliefs, a lot of them have been done wrong so they do wrong, therefore I believe we should always try to understand each other because communication can avoid huge issues (DreamTale), and I think it's okay for people to take revenge, even to the extent of killing an abuser if the circumstance just happens to be that way (I'm not gonna specify what irl situation I'm thinking of but I do not advocate for murdering people in general guys, but it's only fair to see the motive, people aren't born criminals and sometimes the extreme feels like the only way out one way or another. Essentially, see people for more than their crimes. Of course some people are just disgusting assholes, but you get the idea.)

Having to memorize the lore and world building, along with creators, characters, interpretations, AND variations, doing all this helps me practice organizing thoughts and articulating difficult information

They actually boost my creativity and keep me happy, when I'm stressed, opening Tumblr to my favorite sillies literally takes my mind off whatever was bothering me, like I actually need them to lower any anxiety levels and keep me regulated

However on the downside they can make me very hyper, sometimes so emotionally so that I shut down for a bit because I physically cannot express my adoration for them and it's overwhelming but I never shut down for too long, I love them, they keep me going y'know!

They help me explore diversity and character writing, putting depth and thought into a being, helps me with my own creations <3

Actually, I'm too shy to look at × reader/self insert/(Y/N) content most of the time unless it's platonic (Might just be me being aromantic honestly) BUT I Have seen stuff where they affirm body types and "Flaws" and stuff like that and I think if I was less of a prude I could look at that stuff and it'd make me feel better about my insecurities, but for now my partners are doing a good job at keeping me normal

Essentially I just need all my sillies to work properly!!! 💕 (I'm so sane, and normal, and not senile about them :3)

(CW For Next Bit: Mental Health, Paranoia, Panic Attack Discussed)

Actually about that, my obsession with the skeletons used to be SO bad that I felt like they were always watching me and my brain would involuntarily make me feel paranoid and bad about myself (Possible ODC symptom where you're afraid of being judged for your thoughts/actions?) and I can't tell if it was a panic attack I had a couple years ago where I couldn't keep caring what they "Think" and I just had to scream and sob because you literally can't hold it in during one (If it was this, I guess I sorta pushed them away D:), OR my partners replaced my brain sillies so I feel them to a lesser extent

(Insecurity, Self Care Issues, And Gay Talk 😭 Oh and also mention of paranoia again but not so bad)

Like it used to be so bad I couldn't get up because I felt yucky, but I couldn't take a shower because they were "There", but now it's like, if my partners are my brain sillies, they like me, we'd probably take showers together when we live together and shit like that, it's okay if they're "Watching" me, actually, they're actual people somewhere else, doing something else, they don't just exist because I think of them the way the silly skeles do, they're actually defined and aren't actually around, it's just me thinking about them, it's okay, I don't have to feel so bad or weird about it, of course I still do a bit because insecurity is hard to scrape off, but I think I'm getting a little better and that's all that matters

Anyways point is, I need my wives, both skeletons and real, to function properly or I'm literally DOOMED

[dead-dolphins]

Hey everyone! Welcome to my fic masterlist! I’m so glad you’re here, and before you start exploring, there are a few things I’d like to share with you:

Exclusively on AO3: I only publish my work on AO3, so if you happen to see my fics floating around somewhere else, please let me know. It’s likely an unauthorised reproduction, and I’d appreciate your help in keeping my work safe and where it belongs.

Tags and Themes: While I do follow certain themes and motifs across my fics, each one has specific tags on AO3. These tags are there to help you navigate the content and ensure it aligns with your preferences. Please take a moment to check them out before diving in—this way, we can both avoid any awkward or uncomfortable situations.

Tumblr AUs: If you’ve enjoyed any of my AUs on Tumblr, you’ll find their final, polished versions on AO3. Tumblr asks are fantastic for sparking ideas, but when it comes to writing, I put a lot of thought into my decisions, and the final product is always what you see on AO3.

No Post-Publishing Changes: Once a fic is published, I typically don’t make changes or add new chapters in between those already released. While I don’t foresee this changing in the future, if there’s ever a significant update or adjustment, I’ll be sure to keep you in the loop through my platforms.

Thanks so much for your support and for being part of this community. Writing is a joy, but sharing it with all of you makes it truly special. I hope you continue to enjoy the stories, and I look forward to hearing from you! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions or just want to chat about the fics.

Happy reading!

──✦ Through the Night — One shoot. Canon divergence AU. Cabin fic.

It’s through the night when Eren’s mind doesn’t stop thinking while his hands don’t stop tracing the profile of the sleeping woman who rests at his side. The boy loses his faith and sinks alone. And it’s through the night too when Mikasa's sweet touch calms his demons. “We'll be free. The two of us, just wait”.

──✦ White Mustang — One shoot. Modern Au. Smut.

At a party packed with wealthy people, Mikasa is too bored to try to function with the dynamics of that environment. Just when everyone seems to be minding their own business, someone suggests her to illegally escape, even if it is just for a few moments. Destiny? The Mustang car parked in the empty back lot.

──✦ Snowdrops— One shoot. Canon divergence AU. Cabin fic.

Eren lifts his gaze green as the summer forest to meet Mikasa's pearly sparkling eyes. How lovely she is, he quickly thinks. "You can join us looking for snowdrops next Christmas. This time we'll wait for you. I promise." He nods with small tears of affection accumulating in the lines of his eyes. He likes that beautiful feeling. "Of course. We will."

──✦ Accidentally in Love — One shoot. Modern AU. Goth Eren & Normie Mikasa.

"She's so pretty, she's outstanding everywhere, and she also studies a difficult degree. Meanwhile, just look at me! I haven't left my goth stage since I was a teenager! I'm a complete disaster!" When a goth boy finds himself smitten with a cute girl (who happens to be his best friend), he's faced with a challenge: overcoming his shyness to ask her out on a date.

──✦ Love is a War — One shoot. Greek AU. Ares & Aphrodite retelling.

Just when the warrior thinks the girl will walk silently away, she turns around, dazzling him with her grey gaze. He quickly concludes that her eyes are not like stars. They are like distant galaxies in the universe that shine brightly, like sparks produced by the clash of the metal of two swords. “My name is Mikasa.” She looks up at him with the corners of her lips turned up, her cupid's bow so deep and so… captivating. “The goddess of love and beauty… or so they say.” “Eren,” he says, introducing himself, after a few seconds that taste like an eternity. “God of war.” In which the God of War falls madly in love with the goddess of love.

──✦ I apologise if you feel something — Short multi/chapter fic. Modern AU. OG Metalhead Eren.

“Maybe we could make it, you know… more private.” Mikasa thinks about it for a few moments. It isn’t a secret that Eren usually has one night standing with his fans. If she agrees, she knows that she’ll become part of a seemingly long list. As much as Eren, the vocalist of “The Rumbling” is the boy she has had a crush on for quite some time, is it worthy being on that list? Maybe, just maybe... yes.

──✦ don't ask, don't tell — One shoot. Modern AU. Mikasa/Eren/Mikasa

“We can make you feel better, you need it.” One of them tells him with her tender tinkle voice. “You've been so lonely lately, haven't you?” “Don't think about it too much, Eren.” The other girl demands with a fearless tone. “You need us.” Eren could have pushed them away, he could have finally run away, because he never told either of them his name. However, he closes his eyes and lets them put a pill on his tongue that he swallows with pleasure. Then, everything goes black…

──✦ All He Ever Wanted — One shoot. Modern AU. Inspired in Around the corner by ili-akkaman.

The day his nose met the strength of her fist smoothly transformed into days riddled with secret kissing in the same house as Carla and Faye; behind the curtains, in the kitchen, or in the garage. Dating secretly from Levi, only around the corner from Mikasa’s house, with the significant risk of being discovered at any time. Yet when they were alone, all the prior tricks they did with fidgety hands fissioned and burst into something wonderful. They invariably ended up rubbing together, tangled up on Eren's mattress of soiled sheets, utterly disregarding Mikasa's curfew.

──✦ Scarlet — Ficlet. Canon divergence AU. Scarlet With inspired.

And at that moment, it all became crystal clear to her. The four years of bliss, the cabin in the mountains, and the unborn child were nothing more than a long dream that had finally reached its end. Welcome to the real world, Mikasa.

──✦ The Promised Princess — Longfic. Medieval fantasy AU. aka Lord Eren & Princess Mikasa. ONGOING

“I'm not sure how to describe it to you, but I saw you, Mikasa, in the deepest of my wolf dreams, I saw you. It makes me think that perhaps… Perhaps we were always meant to be together.” When the last rays of summer kiss the lands of the Seven Kingdoms, a spring-born princess is betrothed to a Winterlord. With small traces of an immemorial connection between dreams, they will soon realise that it is not simply the promise of a king that has drawn them together.

──✦ Chemical Hype Boy — Longfic. Modern AU. aka Actor Eren & Idol Mikasa. ONGOING

“I’ve reached a point where I can’t even picture a life without you anymore, let alone breathe. You’ve taken over my world, become my everything... My foolish heart? It’s not mine; it’s yours—all yours to take and hurt if you want, Mikasa.”  Everyone knows that A-list actor Eren Yeager hates idols. Yet his life is abruptly disturbed when he meets Mikasa, a top idol who has trained with blood, sweat, and tears to find her spot on stage—being him her biggest inspiration. A relationship, tinged with flavours of secrecy, ignites between them. But can it last when their not-so-similar worlds threaten to keep them apart?

FLOWERS SERIES — Set of one-shots inspired by the eremika cabin with an accidental pregnancy.

──✦ Growing Flowers — One shoot. Canon divergence AU. Cabin fic.

You know, we never did get married.” “I didn’t think it mattered to you,” she answers. “Honestly, I feel like we’ve been married for a long time already.” Eren’s laughter, though somewhat strained, rings out as if he’s made an effort to do it. “Well, you’re right about that,” he concedes. “I’ve been married to you since I met you. But if you need a ring…” He reaches into his pants pocket and retrieves two wedding rings, their origin a mystery known only to him. “Here, this is for you.” “Eren…” Mikasa’s voice trembles, and she fights to keep her composure. She doesn't want to break down. She should not. She must not. She cannot. “Thank you,” she says instead, allowing him to place the wedding ring on her finger. Yet Mikasa secretly believes that the red scarf serving as the baby pillow in the basket is her true wedding ring. Months after their daring escape from the ravages of war, two soldiers find themselves confronting the bitter reality that the dreams they once held dear still persist. Flowers grow in Mikasa's belly, and Eren does nothing but cultivate them until his last breath.

──✦ Blooming Flowers — One shoot. Canon divergence AU. Epistolary sequel to Growing Flowers.

Please, when my time comes, wait for me on the other side and hold my hand, Eren. Rest assured that I will recognize you instantly, I always did, and I always will. Perhaps, there, we can live a long and happy life together. Wouldn’t it be wonderful? Now and always yours, The girl who never gave up on you, Mikasa. Mikasa grieves by writing letters to her most beloved, recounting the events that have unfolded since he went away.

──✦ Whitered Flowers — One shoot. Canon divergence AU. Epistolary Sequel to Blooming Flowers.

Thank you for the life you have lived, for the strength you have shown, and for the love that has never faded. You are, and always will be, the most extraordinary girl I have ever known. Our journey together is far from over; it is simply moving to a new and beautiful chapter. You and I, Mikasa, we will be eternal. Lovingly yours, The boy who sought freedom, The one who loves you the most, Your husband, Your man, Eren. PS: I am waiting for you on the other side and trust me, I am ready to hold your hand. In the afterlife, Eren responds to his most beloved's letters.

──✦ Dark Knight — Oneshoot. Medieval AU. aka Knight Eren & Crown Princes Mikasa.

“I need a child,” she states bluntly. “My husband is unable to provide one, so I’m compelled to explore other options. I, um…” Mikasa’s voice wavers for a moment, but she clears her throat, summoning her strength. “I wish for you to father a child with me.” “So you would have me as your whore?” Eren interrupts, his voice laced with an undercurrent of menace. The rawness of his words strikes her like a frigid wind, stealing the breath from her lungs. Naturally, he would think of this as a calamity to his chivalry; surely, in this moment of humiliation, he feels no shame in hurling insults her way. The Crown Princess is desperate for an heir, and who better to fulfil this need than her devoted Dark Knight?

UPDATED: 23/11/24

[supernovasilence]

Casmund happy ending: I love the idea of the Pevensies(mostly Edmund) trying to teach Caspian how to function in the real world with them. I think Edmund Lucy and Susan's favorite part would be trying to get him proper clothes. He basically looks regal and princely in everything he wears. Also when Edmund introduces Caspian to his mother. He's super charming, kissing her hand and stuff. Peter is a little(maybe a lot annoyed) of Caspian dating his brother. But he gets over it really quick. Their mother takes Edmund and Caspian's relationships really well. It's mainly their father they have to deal with. But Peter puts his foot down and talks to his father. Gives him basically an ultimatum. Accept your son as is, or lose all your children and not just one. Because the Pevensies are ride or die for each other. And Edmund and Caspian are basically married in all the ways that matter.

Sorry for the late response! I was thinking about Caspian in the real world, and wanted to ask if you've seen the Dorian Gray movie with Ben Barnes, because the beginning with innocent Dorian wandering London around all wide-eyed gives off such Caspian-in-England vibes. I couldn't find any gifs of that scene on tumblr, and instead of just screenshotting it like a reasonable person I thought "well, I know how to make gifs. how long could it take?" AND THEN IT WAS 2AM. Anyway have these gifs of Caspian completely failing to act casual while I ramble about your ask.

(yeah it'd be more cars than horse-drawn carriages by the 1940s but Caspian almost getting run over was too cute to leave out. he's trying his best)

Oh my gosh yes, Caspian is the sort to kiss people's hands. The chivalrous disaster. He probably goes around calling people "my lady" and "my good lord" etc too. And he absolutely would somehow look regal in whatever he wears. Edmund is torn because he wants Caspian to blend in, but also his boyfriend looks so gorgeous. Also imagine Edmund tying Caspian's tie for him. And the hat Caspian is wearing in the gifs above looks a lot like the one Edmund wears in Prince Caspian. What if Edmund is scolding Caspian, telling him mess up your hair or something, slouch a little more, you still look like a king, stop standing like you've got a crown on— And Caspian grabs Edmund's hat from the coatrack and puts it on. "Does this help?" he asks, grinning, because Edmund's brain just stopped working for a moment and Caspian knows it.

As much as I want the Pevensie parents to just be okay with their son being gay (or their children, because let's be real, none of these siblings are straight), realistically at least one of them would have some difficulties with it. I love Peter not being happy about Edmund and Caspian dating but instantly getting over it when he needs to defend them to his father. These siblings are so close and it's so good. Imagine traces of the High King showing through as Peter calmly, firmly tells his father Edmund and Caspian are together. This is how things are going to go, and there is nothing he can do except make himself miserable by pushing his children away. And Richard* sees a side to his oldest son he hasn't before--or maybe hasn't accepted before, but it has been there for a while. And he takes some time to really look at his children, and sees all sorts of things about them, strange things, but they make his children seem so alive. Like how happy Caspian makes Edmund. So after that the parents have a new son-in-law.

*props for LWW use Richard as Mr. Pevensie's first name and since he doesn't have one in the books I'm taking Richard and running with it

[xianhuashi-second-blog]

Big Hero 6 was 9 years ago, going on 10. Next year is when it takes place. So, this is an appreciation post for the movie, and what it’s done for me.

Trigger Warning ahead, the post mentions de@th and $u1c1d3, (spelled wrong so I don’t get flagged/shadow banned by the Tumblr gods.) complex grief and mentions of mental health.

BH6 came out when I was 4-5 (what a long time ago omfg-) so its importance to me was non existent. Me and my (much) Older brother watched it together a few years later in 2016. Young me didn’t know the nuance and severity of Hiro Hamada as a character. All I saw was “Two Asian siblings” that had a relationship like me and my brother. I tuned out the rest of the movie that night because I had *and still have* the attention span of a goldfish with dementia. Years later, very recently, (near the end of 2023, but school still in session ) he jumped. He passed away that day. I think I cried an ocean when I got the news from my father.

I cried, not only because I love and miss him with all I am, I sobbed because he was my other half, essentially another father. I cried because I felt, I knew I could have done something differently, so then maybe he’d be alive a bit longer. And, I cry because of all he put himself through for me. It’s hard to imagine the suffering and agony he put himself through to be there for me.

I have diagnosed High functioning Autism. My brother had a feeling, but he helped me understand how neurotypicals interact, how to fake making eye contact, how to hold up a conversation, learn body language, you name it. He even bought me noise canceling headphones because I’m sensitive to loud sounds, and fidget toys that I could use during school. My parents, on the other hand, thought I was just a spoilt brat who needs to pay attention to people, and stop being so picky with foods and their textures, a brat that has to be more social, stop shying away from kids my age. My brother was the one to convince them to get me tested for Autism, to prove I wasn’t just a bratty kid.

He sat through my ramblings about Steven Universe and The Stanley Parable. He helped me work through my meltdowns, and told me it wasn’t my fault that certain things make me upset.

I crumbled to the ground. My world was shattered. After I was “back into reality,” I realized my father was holding me in his arms. I hugged him tightly. My face was smushed against his chest so hardly that it felt like my cheek was about to break. It felt like him. It felt like how he’d wrap me in bear hugs. Weeks went by. We had his Funeral. I looked at the picture of him near his casket. It felt surreal knowing that the same man was inside of the wooden box, awaiting his burial. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream and shout and cause myself to have a breakdown, but I physically couldn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to be angry at him either. So I just stood there, fingers slightly touching his coffin, where I knew his face would be.

Later on, being forced to go back to school the following week because the American school system sucks 🖕 🇺🇸

I got back home. I went on disney plus to elevate myself of my grief. I scrolled through the home screen, when Big Hero 6 showed up. I remembered watching it with him, so I convinced myself- despite not wanting reminders- to watch it. “Welcome to Nerd-school. Nerd.” I watched the fire alarms blair. The infamous “someone has to help” scene before he ran into the fire. Then, the scene where Hiro was sitting alone on the staircase in his memorial outfit. That frame alone was truly a perfect representation of sudden loss and grief. I felt seen, and acknowledged. I felt understood. I kept watching. Near the end, Hiro was trying to “fix Baymax” with the violence chip thing. “Is this what Tadashi would have wanted?” “It doesn’t matter!” And then finally, “Tadashi’s GONE! Tadashi’s… gone….” The feeling that scene gave me was complicated. But, it left me with the knowledge that he was with me in memory. That, of course, didn’t take away everything that was happening to me.

That movie helped me through complicated emotions, and I cannot thank the BH6 team enough for what they’ve done for me, and how that movie helped me. I still blame myself for what happened. I’m still grieving, and it’s still hard to live without him. And the idea that Tadashi doesn’t get to see his baby brother’s super hero team, yet said team wouldn’t exist without his death, helps me realize that without my brother’s death, I wouldn’t have such a kind community of fellow fans of the movie, who enjoy my art and my storytelling.

Thank you for all you’ve done. Thank you for everything. It was an honor to have you as my brother, and I miss you so much. I know not many people have good relationships with their older siblings right off the bat, so I am so grateful you could give me that friendship. I promise i’m gonna make you proud.

[actualbird]

UHM HELLO!! idk how to use tumblr tbh and im awkward so this is gonna be. uh. yeah HOW DO YOU GO BACK TO ANOTHER LINE - moving on. i love ur polynxx hcs soooo so much please i need more more more 🤲🤲

wahhh, hello and welcome to tumblr :D!!! im so glad i enjoy my nxx polycule stuff hehe and it's been a While since ive written for them (be it for fic or hcs) so this ask came at a lovely time. without further ado, here's some:

the nxx polycule date permutation hcs

due to everybody's schedules being immensely packed all the time, all 5 of them cant go out on dates/get-togethers very often with everybody in attendance. like, when theyre All together it's often for NXX Work OR they save it for special occasions (ex. christmas, new years, any of the team's bdays)

that being said, the Top 1 most common not-everybody date permutations are: artem + mc + luke, and then marius + vyn

-

artem + mc + luke can meet up often and easily because artem and mc work at the same place (so they can quickly figure out when their schedules align, quickly meet up), AND all three of them LIVE IN THE SAME STELLIS CITY DISTRICT!!!

they all live in South Stellis (mc's address was mentioned in The Birth of Stellis | Tears of Themis "Behind The Scenes" Episode, and artem's and luke's can be seen easily in the Stellis Explore function) so i can imagine just like

artem and mc finishing up with work and wanting to go out to dinner together and both of them independently and intuitively understanding that on the drive to the restaurant, they should go pick up luke because if left to his own devices he'll probably only chips and a stale salad for dinner.

mc shoots luke a quick text like "let's have dinner! artem's treat!" 5 minutes prior to them arriving at his shop, and luke panics trying to find something nice to wear because if it's Artem's Treat then that means the restaurant is gonna be QUITE UPSCALE AND FANCY and he doesnt want to look like their boyfriend who they picked off the street from a dumpster because earlier today he had just so happened to be tailing a lead for a case that sent him into the forest so hes all muddy. but hes only got like two (2) sweaters that he himself finds viable for a Fancy Restaurant Date

so when mc and artem arrive to pick him up, hes wearing the blocky xmas partyland sweater. at which mc visibly winces at and at which artem internally winces at

but they all go out for a nice dinner out anyway

-

MEANWHILE, marius + vyn's homes are in completely different stellis city districts: orchideshine and long beach, hemingway heights respectively. and the Stellis Explore function seems to posit these two locations as pretty far-ish away from each other, yeah, BUT....

marius' PERSONAL STUDIO is right in the same neighborhood as vyn's place

i assume marius' personal studio is in this area because another thing thats in hemingway heights (that's just not mentioned in the Stellis Explore function) is Stellis University, where marius is taking his masters. so right after his classes, he can drop by his studio and destress before heading over to the CBD for work

ORRRR HE CAN DROP BY VYN'S PLACE UNANNOUNCED AND SWEEP HIM OFF HIS FEET FOR AN IMPROMPTU DATE

marius has mastered this art. he comes to learn vyn's schedule at the university, at the research center, and at his home so that he only shows up when vyn isnt busy and is most likely to actually say yes to an impromptu fancy lunch

and vyn acts like hes Bothered but he really isnt, especially when marius has the money to treat him out to the High End Pastry Places that even vyn "pastry master" richter can appreciate

basically it goes

marius, yelling on vyn's yard: hey vyn! let's go out on a date!

vyn: get off my yard

marius: PLLEEEAAASSSEEEE, i'll take you to that bougie place you like!

vyn: fine (secretly pleased to be spoiled)

-

that being said, while these are the most common date permutations due to the simple reason of proximity, they all still find time to meet up in different permutations and all together

vyn appreciates luke taking him out on dates to more simple places, like a family owned diner or a hole in the wall ramen place. while it's not his usual kind of place, he enjoys the food and seeing luke light up talking about the memories hes had in this particular establishment ("one time, i ate here immediately after a mission and i was still bleeding out!!" "....please take care of all open wounds before you have ramen")

marius and luke and mc often meet up online and video call to game together. sometimes artem will join in on the call, despite not being much of a gamer himself, but he just likes hearing their voices and enthusiasm and yelling in the background while he cooks or works

ARTEM AND VYN GO TO THE FARMER'S MARKET TOGETHER. theyre both culinary Geniuses after all, and together they are extremely picky about produce and honey and handicrafts like an old married couple

and of course, they all get together every once in a while when their schedules permit and have a lovely time and enjoy each other's company

-

bonus, what kind of dates each of their residences are best for

artem's residence: best for full-team dinners and movie marathons in his home theatre

mc's residence: best for cozy afternoons because her place is so homey!!

vyn's residence: best for full-team outdoor brunches and tea times and also if you want a touch of nature relaxing in his garden

marius' residence: best for THAT WALK-IN WINE CELLAR and also movie marathons because have you seen the wall-mounted flat screen TV in his bedroom??? phew

luke's residence: best for uhhh...if you wanna slip on stray files on the floor or stub your toe on his palette bedframe? JHFKJ JUST KIDDING, best for in-person gaming hangouts

[dom-guilfoyle]

Okay so (sorry if you've answered this before, Tumblr isn't turning anything up, but the search function is notorioisly...nonfunctioning) I have a question.

I'm trying not to give many dire spoilers to anyone else new, but what are the 'proper' pronouns for the Queen's child? Do the fae even conceptualise them the same way/does it even matter to them? I noticed that Queen usually uses 'they' for their child, but also just kind of goes with the flow well enough, and uses 'he' sometimes when Guide is using 'he' to refer to him. (And, sidenote, I'm p sure they're always or almost always referred to as they themself too. I can't remember if anyone besides Guide refers to any of the other fae using pronouns and not just titles/nomikers, and Guide assumes Stranger is 'he', but is that correct? Or, again, is there even such a thing as 'correct' when it comes to the fae? Is this something they care about? Or, also, could it be something they purposely don't clarify and prefer the ambiguity, because the less people know for certain, well...the less people know! And the less they have over you! That does seem to be how they operate).

And Beast I'm pretty sure referred to them as 'he' a couple times soon after Guide said what ppl at Mistholme knew him as, but usually defaults back to 'she' still, because that's how he remembers his friend.

I'm just interested to know if there's an answer to this, I suppose, and if it will be brought to a conclusion in the show or purposely left ambiguous. I think either way is interesting, as from my questions above, I've been turning this around a lot.

Also, related: was the whole backstory of the Queen's child, with the pulling away from family and finding a place with Beast instead, and then going back only to basically take what they could (what was theirs) and leave again, stay estranged because of the expectations of them they didn't want, plus added in that Beast literally knew his close friend as a girl only for him to be known as a man later in life... was that Supposed to be a trans allegory at inception, or was that just a happy accident? I feel like it's too much to be accidental, but I thought I'd ask. I love it either way and was really taken in by Beast's arc, and I'm very interested to see how it pans out when (if?) they [Queen's child]

Sorry that was so long lol. I've just been bingeing the show the past few days whilst i was working on things and it's been on my mind a lot!

Hey, thanks for listening and also thinking so much about the show!

I've kept things a little ambiguous with regard to the Fae's concept of gender, because it allows for the conflict between the Queen and The Man to be about more than just one thing. It's about gender, but also parental expectations and finding yourself and whatever else it sparks inside you. The Fae are very different from us in a lot of ways, but also a lot like us in others, and that means the story can resonate with our experiences without being a direct allegory.

I was definitely thinking in terms of gender discovery and transness, but from the Queen's perspective we don't even really know if that's part of it at all for them. I wrote the Fae to have a different concept of gender to us because, well, why wouldn't they? And then I've left it a bit ambiguous because explaining everything about something can make it mundane, and I definitely don't ever want the alternatural to be mundane. In my head, the Queen is The Man's only "Parent", they just decided to have an heir and kind of... manifested one? Because that seems like something a Fairy Queen would do. But that's not really important to the narrative, so, no need to include it.

Pronouns for characters are:

Guide: It/Its

The Queen: They/Them

The Man: Tricky. The people in the Museum use He/Him, because that's what they've known him as this whole time and they've never been corrected. They don't know how The Fae relate to gender and they have bigger problems at this point.

The Queen uses They/Them, because The Man is more than just an individual- they're The Heir, they're not a person they're the future, and all of The Queen's expectations made manifest. Sometimes they've said He in front of the Guide, because the Guide has actually interacted with The Man far more recently than The Queen has, and they're like... going along with that? But they always default back to neutral terms.

The Beast still thinks of The Man as their friend, the person they were when they were both cubs. It's very stuck in the past, desperate for a return, and the complexity of the Fae isn't something it understands. Sometimes it uses He/Him, but it's not really sure what it all means.

Stranger: He/Him is probably fine? I think Stranger probably changes it on a whim to mess with people anyway lol.