#I just figured she was a cis tomboy lesbian

[bluemoonrabbit]

One of my new friends moved here from Texas to feel safe as a trans woman. Putting aside how horrifying that is for a moment, today we went to this board game cafe where fully half the staff were visibly trans, and she got so giddy and adorable about it.

[velvetvexations]

Really love how every time I argue with people on here about how actually trans men do not generally have it meaningfully better than trans women, people avoid actually explaining their points or providing sources and start calling me a little boy. Very fun. Love that. It's so fun to be insulted for asking asking people to explain their point

No one can actually explain that.

rhea ripley is so hot. and for what

for me to be all Weird Trans Woman about her

Honestly as an non binary person, I feel more and more pushed out of the community with the serious adherence to the binary. "if you Id as this you MUST be this thing, you're you're a liar and a faker and you're hurting other trans people" that, and the denial of trans men's oppression. It's just cruel and bitter, and seeing other trans people go down this path is pretty disheartening

it's so depressing

Well, you see, it's not like saying they're transitioning from black to white, because OBVIOUSLY, just like race, your soulgender is immediately apparent to everyone as soon as you plop out the womb

lmao so true

(also I've heard soulgender is a Black thing and it should be spelled with like, a space or a hyphen? so I'm probably gonna do that from now on)

"Trans men are the White People of the trans community" Oh okay so yeah this is just "Ace people are the White People of the Queer Community" all over again huh Begging other whities to stop comparing race and gender like this, makes you look stupid as fuck

pls

Fascinated to know if the "All trans women are nonbinary" crowd also believe all trans men are nonbinary

you'd think so the way they insist trans men cling to being AFAB lmao

Went to check /-/'s blog and she's reblogging pro Chat-GPT and anti-copyright posts now

I'm tapping the sign.

as a nonbinary thing i feel like so much tma/tme shit just completely fucking forgets us like im not „occasionally mistaken as a trans woman” its a fucking coin flip!!!!!!!! my „AGAB” doesbt matter 2 ppl outside the the internet!!!!! all that matters is no matter what i wear no one wants me i their bathroom!!!!!

people don't even just hate you for when they mistake you for a trans woman anon they hate non-binary people AFAB too

i kinda feel like the discourse is becoming more mainstream now. im seeing a lot of trans bloggers who dont post much about trans issues making posts about it (usually along the lines of "can we be normal about trans guys please" which is nice)

good maybe the backlash will finally kick in

Idk if this is me generalizing but I’ve started noticing that headcanons of canonically male characters as trans women that get traction are usually skinny and have trauma or coded with anxiety or depression. Like idk if that means literally anything but just a weird observation I had

a lotta people on here literally define being a woman as when bad things happen to you lmao

I was looking at the Patricia Taxxon stuff (funny enough, did actually see you @ ed in deleted replies) and I saw the sentence “However, being discriminated on the basis of being perceived as a manly woman is just an adverse effect of transmisogyny directed towards trans men.” Which. Hey now. What about butch women. Like how does that not uniquely apply to cis butch lesbians, even if we ignore trans men entirely.

MAINSTREAM SOCIETY LOVES TOMBOYS

Man. It really sucks when a popular-ish figure you look up to turns out to be transandrophobic. Should have seen it coming ig. She was intersexist too, and those often go hand in hand.

well I mean it sounds like you shouldn't have looked up to her already lmao

IIRC from old drama, Patricia Taxxon also thinks toxic masculinity isn't a real thing that can harm men because it's just splash damage from misogyny and they should get over it, lol, so I'm not surprised if she's turned out to be weird about trans men

lmao literally just that radfem-libfem feminism-is-for-women comic huh

Tragic: local man forced to actually read Serano's writing for the theory he's trying to make even though the way she talks about transmasculinity and female gender nonconformity gives him a headache

F

[fizzy-tizzy]

Headcanons for all the survivors gender/sexuality

Wilson- Just Kinda decided he was gonna be a boy when he was like 8 and his dad was so desperate for an heir that didn’t want him dead to rights he just kinda let it happen. would fuck anyone but at the same time is not interested at all

Willow- Butch-ish but more in a tomboy kinda way. genuinely likes wearing skirts and more feminine clothing but doesn’t really think she deserves to? if that makes sense? (She doesn’t really feel like a genuine legit girl) hardcore lesbian.

Wolfgang- Very traditionally masculine but in the “My job is to protect and take care of everyone” and not the “im a man so I can do whatever I want” type way. Gay but could totally be in a lavender relationship/marriage and have no problems w/ it

WX-78- Born a cis female, figured out early on that wasn’t right but couldn’t change it until they were an adult. Transed their gender but then figured out being a male wasn’t right either. eventually found someone who felt similarly and abandoned their flesh for the machine. solidly aroace. they’re triple a (agender, asexual, aromantic) just like batteries

Wickerbottom- cis female and “traditionally” feminine, has never felt the need to explore or question it. Used to be married to a man who was secretly gay and looking for someone similarly emotionally unavailable. He has since passed but left wicker a small fortune so. alls well that ends well ig

Wes- kind of a stereotypical femme twink. The kinda gay whos loud and proud and will hit you with a brick if you have a problem with that. feels obligated to help the others try and figure themselves out- esp the ones who are more in denial abt it

Maxwell- I think the idea that max is trans and Jack is cis and they turned out looking the exact same is hilarious. Technically the only ppl who knows he’s trans are jack and charlie- their parents just think he’s a masculine woman and everyone else knows him as a man. Bi and so so weak for bears and gently bossy women.

Wendy- Non-binary but still in the process of realizing it. Does not give a single shit abt romance but would totally be qpp with Webber once they know what that means.

Woodie- Probably Not Cis but has too much religious trauma to even dare questioning himself. He’s like JUST accepted the fact that he’s gay (still thinks hes going straight to hell but we’re working on that) so ynknow baby steps. baby steps. Deffo has a shit ton of body dysphoria due to the wereforms tho

Webber- Since spiders work a lil different in the constant (probably more like bees) there are like three genders Webber could potentially see themselves as. Drone, warrior, and queen. During his childhood he thinks of himself mostly as a drone but as he gets older and his sway over the spiders increases they’ll shift into seeing themselves as more of a queen. But other that he’s pretty much whatever non-spider gender is most convenient. Definitely bi.

Wigfrid- her gender is… strange. What she outwardly presents is her character’s way of presenting herself so ig I see her as kinda fluid? Idk valiant-valkyrie if ur reading this you can probably do a better job of explaining it. you are the defacto wigfrid authority. Definitely lesbian but once again will do whatever the role requires

Winona- Solidly butch lesbian. Definitely a caretaker and a protector but in the butch kinda way and not the femme kinda way. if that makes sense.

Wurt- Butch but hasn’t really realized it yet. does not think human genders apply to her bcs she’s a merm and will 100% be king when she grows up. baby lesbiab. her and wilba’s eventual union shall bring peace to the pig/merm kingdoms once and for all

Wortox- human genders do not apply to him. They are whatever is most convenient at the time. Fluid like loki and bugs bunny.

Walter- if xenogenders existed back then he would totally be like pupgender/buggender. Non-binary but has no problem being called a boy/man. Would be fine with any prns but people have only ever used he/him for him. Probably going to be a monsterf*cker when he grows up.

Wormwood- He is plant. Plants have sexes but no genders and wormwood is intersex anyway but they kinda just chose the first option presented to him once he found the others. Loves all but has absolutely no interest or idea about non-plant reproductive activities.

Walani- Yknow that “as a girl who’s a gross dude men who are fancy ladies are my best friends”? Yeah that’s her and Warly. she’s the emotional support golden retriever to warly’s high-strung cheetah. Lesbian but like. endearingly loser lesbian who’s only ever smooth when she’s not trying to be.

Warly- as mentioned before he is very much a guy who is a fancy lady. Would probably do drag if he had the chance and would 100% be the baddest bitch who makes all the men question their sexuality. Gay and european.

Wanda- doesn’t have time for all that gender questioning bullshit she just wants to kiss women.

Wheeler- Solid futch, leans more feminine or masculine depending on the situation. Woman-leaning bisexual, has probably fucked someone wife and inadvertently caused a divorce.

Woodlegs- pretty solidly cis male but 100% an embarrassing old gay grandpa. Doesn’t know much abt the terminology but is incredibly supportive and was definitely a homewrecker back in the day. Probably got out of at least one arrest by seducing the naval officer meant to bring him in

Wilba- high femme and definitely a baby lesbian. I do really like the idea of her being trans just because why not so why not. She and wurt are fat femme x fat butch once they grow up

Wagstaff- born as a girl but realized he hated it and made attempts to transition early on. Eventually ran away to America to fully transition. Non-binary too but hasn’t realized it yet and just thinks that everyone feels weird when someone calls them mr or sir. men-liker and old man yaoi certified

Wilbur- yes I’m doing the monkey. Gender is a strange concept to him, so he just kinda calls himself male bcs apparently he is? He doesn’t really understand it but it seems to be pretty important in human society so he’ll do it if it means he gets respected as an actual person and not just some sideshow.

[up-in-flames-writing]

This is an old Twitter thread I'm posting here as an archive, when I eventually get banned on there for not tolerating transphobic abuse against me.

Still pretty relevant tho, even tho it was written almost a year & a half ago.

I'm sorry, I don't know how to do alt text, so here is the image ID under the cut:

[Image ID: A Twitter thread made by user Booker-Garet Feniks @abookandabun. The thread reads:

So, lately, I've been seeing some Takes™ on transition on here, & as a transman who looks like a baby butch lesbian, I have some Thoughts™, so here's a thread

First thing's first: I am short. I am skinny (read: underweight), & curvy. I have a more or less conventional hourglass figure. I also have a soft face, big lips & big eyes with long lashes. I keep my nails long & my hair long & when I cut them, they grow back fast

By all means, if I were a woman, I would be, if not conventionally attractive, at least conventionally feminine, with my small waist, wide hips, my long legs, & even my tiny tits. Despite this, I dress masculine. I hold myself like a man, I deepen my voice

My voice is naturally a bit deep, but not deep enough for there to be any ambiguity about what's in my pants. I still speak in a fake, deep voice, & when I introduce myself, I do it with a grin & tell everyone very openly 'my name is Booker-Garet'

Despite this, I do not pass. I am constantly Miss'ed & Ma'am'ed when I'm out & about. People who know me need to be told that I'm a man & go by he/him pronouns. Imagine that, imagine calling a teenage boy with an unambiguous male name 'she'. Imagine how I feel

How I feel when none of my efforts matter. How, when I'm at my most masculine while pre-op & pre-T, people see meas nothing more than a girl. It's distressing. I know what they're thinking, that I'm a tomboy or a lesbian. If they recognise that I'm trans, they don't show it

And, I feel like it's easy to get mad at GNC women. It's easy to get mad at the tomboys & the butches & the studs. 'They think I'm you' you might think. 'You're too visible & I'm not, & they think I'm you.'

I find it easy to blame a lot of ciswomen for this. The ones who tell me I should've just stayed a lesbian (which I never was), that I should've just been a tomboy (which I was), that I'm a traitor to womanhood (so be it). It is easy to get mad at them

It's hard being a trans guy, when the only pieces of masculinity coming from a female person people are aware of are the ones who are women, who stay women & who love being women. I didn't love being a woman. I love women, I love my cis & trans sisters

But I can't help feeling bitter when they perform masculinity & no one denies their womanhood, no one on the right side of history. But I can be my most manly self & even my allies feel that I'd just be better off as a lesbian, as a masculine woman.

As if masculinity is alright, is safe, as long as you're a woman who performs it, but the moment you're a man performing masculinity, you're not worth the time, the effort, the brain power.

Almost as I'd it's easier for people to accept me as a masculine woman, with my deep voice & my masculine name, than admit to the fact that I am a man

It's hard to admit that you don't pass. It's hard to admit that I'm not a 'real man', whatever that means. It's not, however, hard to admit that I don't have privilege. It's not hard to admit that I face misogyny.

It's not hard to admit that if you're AFAB & masc presenting, nothing short of a Thor voice & a Gandalf beard, & body hair like a gorilla will make people see you as anything but a woman. Because if I don't say this, who else will? I can't let people live a lie

I can't let people keep on believing that 'transmascs have it easier', that it's easier for us to pass. I can't let people keep believing that we 'run away from womanhood to have male privilege'. Where's my male privilege, Joanne? Did it get lost in the Owl Mail?

People will keep on believing that we have it easier, that we don't face discrimination, that we don't get misgendered & assaulted & killed. They will keep believing that, & they will keep ignoring us & our oppression, unless someone finally says 'Enough!' & tells their story

& I'm a good story teller, so I'm telling you. I don't pass, I wish I did, but I don't. Many of my brothers do not pass. Stop ignoring us just because you think we have it 'easier'. We don't, & your inaction is allowing us to get killed. Do better

End image ID]

[uh-velkommen]

Coming out as Trans, I feel like I've unlocked a new minigame section of life, like I now have access to a world I only ever watched from the sidelines. It's funny how I used to wish I could be part of this community. I always related to the stories I'd hear. So often would I stare at my body in the mirror wishing I could've been born differently. I always felt like there was a part of me missing or that something was wrong. All the stereotypical Trans thoughts were there. I just kept telling myself I only hated the patriarchal norms that were being forced upon me. I only hated my body because of how sexualized it always was. I always wanted to hang out with my brothers friends because they were the only people my age who would come over often. But the past few days, I've been thinking about all the silly things I'd think and do that should've been clearer indications as to who I was/am. (I'm probably gonna continue updating this as I think of more stuff)

I used to try on my brothers clothes, put my hair up in caps and try to look like a boy in pictures.

I tried training myself to speak in a deeper and calmer voice because I hated how high and girly my voice sounded. (I loved having a sore throat because it made my voice deeper while being sick actually made it higher)

I overcompensated when it came to dressing and being girly as a way to bond with my mother despite having no real interest in make up and pedicures. (There's a lot of things that I'd do or want that initially made me think I was cis but we're really just ways that I'd beg to be treated decently or show that I was loved)

I never felt like I was a Lesbian but had no other way to explain my attraction to girls.

I struggled a lot between wondering if I was just a tomboy or butch but found myself relating to Gay men more than butch women.

I literally never ever ever took off my bras because I felt super uncomfortable with the girls moving around.

A lot of the time I worried about upsetting my dad because he was so happy to have finally made a daughter after 4 sons.

My uncle used to have a friend who I could never figure out if she was a boy or a girl (I still don't know to this day) and yet I could never get her out of my head/admired her for being so confounding.

I would get reeeeeaaaaally jealous of Trans women for being beautiful women with boy parts. Sometimes I couldn't fathom why they would give up being a boy as if it were a slice of cake they were refusing "while kids in Africa starved."

I often struggled with questioning if I was dysphoric because of my AGAB or if it was insecurity from my brother calling me fat and ugly all my life.

I was always too scared to come out as lesbian because I knew it felt wrong and on top of that, it wasn't my sexuality that was the big secret I had been keeping. It was something much worse.... my gender.

When I was about 14, Disney released a TV show where the main character was a girl named Dylan and I felt a cosmic shift in learning that women could also have boy names.

I always wanted to do rugged things with my brother. I practically lived vicariously through him, letting him teach me about fighting, parkour, video games, "boyish music" like dubstep. Everything that I didn't have access to. Nowadays I think about how I really just wanted to be him.

I even tried hanging out with my male cousins and family friends more than the women because it felt like this other world that I desperately wanted to understand.

I used to HAAAATE when my uncle would joke around by calling me "little boy" because it felt like he was making fun of my internal struggles.

Sometimes when I wore my hair a certain way I would angrily compare myself to a "little Mexican boy" because why couldn't I look like a pretty Hispanic woman?

The torturous anxiety I'd feel about wearing makeup in public (I literally had a panic attack at prom because my hair stylist put eyeliner on me).

I loved hanging out with the neighborhood Gay kid even though he was like 4 years younger than me because he would let me ride his skateboard. (We found solace in each other bc he got bullied alot and we were both queer - whether I knew it or not)

All my life I've just wanted male friends but I could never obtain a friendship without being sexualized or viewed as an ultimate romantic interest. At the same time I only knew how to interact with boys in a flirtatious manner though it was never intentional.

Shopping for clothes was a whole can of worms in itself but I used to feel sooo uncomfortable going down the aisles of the women's section. All I wanted was to see what the boys section had to offer but I also thought it was entirely off limits to women. Sometimes I pretended I was shopping for my brother or I'd encourage him to let me style him so I could have an excuse to buy the clothes I liked/wanted.

Sometimes I'd want to date boys but only in the way that boys would date boys.

When I found out about intersexuality I got super obsessed with it, wishing that I could've been born with both male and female parts. Sometimes I'd think that maybe I had a hormonal problem where I was just producing too much testosterone and that could explain why I felt like a boy.

The visceral reactions to ANY comments about being a good housewife, a clean girl, a future wife, not being able to do a man's job or otherwise putting men first simply because I was born a girl.

God the constant comments about my butt, my mom used to hate that I'd let my pants sag.

The way I'd get SUPER emotionally affected from reading about the AIDs crisis (along with Stonewall) and the way Trans people were treated. I mean before I was even learning about Lesbianism, I was getting enraged about the way it was handled. I'd cry more reading newspaper articles than at actual funerals. I was completely obsessed with learning more and more stories from real trans people.

Overall, I think I tended to carry myself and walk in a more masculine manner. I feel like I was never this dainty feminine being until adulthood when I'd started becoming reclusive and turning further in on myself.

[faroresson]

Fuck it, Gender and Sexuality Headcanons cause I’m gay and annoying

This is just for the investigation team cause this post will end up larger than necessary as is

Yu (he/him) Cis but in an “I just work here” kinda way On the Just Some Guy to Dad pipeline. Asexual gray/demiromantic (depending on my mood tbh) gay

Yosuke (he/him) Cis but like, weird about it to a normal level. (The bigotry stops the second your identity comes into question like “hey you can’t do that that’s for girls! I am a girl. Oh alright carry on” kinda shit) bisexual who calls himself gay if he’s dating a man

Chie (She/her) Gender is lesbian, sexuality is lesbian, it’s her main thing that connects her to her womanhood.

Yukiko (she/they) Is closet goth a gender? it is now. Lesbian and she just assumed that’s how the world worked, girls like girls it’s beautiful

Kanji (he/him) Trans man who is sometimes a grandma, his interest shape his gender expression bit by bit as he gets more comfortable with them. Queer sexuality because who give a shit, he likes whoever he likes.

Rise (she/her) Cis but goes buckwild with the hyperfemme presentation when able cause we have fun here sir. Confidently demisexual and biromantic, though would have omni flags/merch as well cause the colours are cool

Teddie (he/him she/her only when it’s confusing) Genderfluid but rarely cut and dry about it, the Alice dress comes out on a she/her boy kinda day, though 90% of the time his gender is “Whatever makes this conversation more interesting”. pansexual cupioromantic

Naoto (she/he with a preference for she) Trans woman all the way with just enough of that soft butch going on, not rough and tumble enough to feel connected to tomboy. She flipflops between various mspec labels but is for sure asexual, it’s the romantic orientation semantics that get her (her friends are not helpful at all with figuring that out) so she settles on queer for the most part

[variousqueerthings]

oof googling for trans men and/or transmasculinity in film is uh... hmmm

With trans people involved

Documentary - 10 movies:

The Brandon Teena Story

A Boy Named Sue

Gendernauts

No Ordinary Man

One Of The Guys

Instructions For Survival

Shinjuku Boys

Southern Comfort

The trans list

Transparent

- I’d honestly recommend all of the above, although there are a couple I haven’t seen, but just because it feels important to hear people speak to their own experience, even if sometimes the structure around them isn’t always... inspiring. The Brandon Teena story is about his murder, so TW for that. I haven’t been able to bring myself to watch it yet, so I don’t know if he’s misgendered in it.

Feature films - 5 movies:

By Hook or by Crook (an experimental film about two petty criminals - a movie I wish had a bigger budget, but fascinating in what it attempts to do and the artistry of the leads! Also the only one of these four I’ve actually seen yet)

52 Tuesdays (about the transition of a parent, filmed over the course of 52 Tuesdays)

Rurangi (came out 2021, I haven’t seen it or spoiled the narrative - I know “there are trans people in it” shouldn’t be enough to sell a move for me, but friends... there are four feature movies on this list)

Open (2010 - um... okay I feel like I’ll mis-represent this film if I try to explain it, especially since I haven’t seen it yet. But it’s not about transitioning or hatecrimes, wahay!)

Adam (NOT the 2019 Adam movie. This isn’t technically a movie, it’s a play, but I wanna add it, because for anyone who has BBC Iplayer or can get it, it’s a play based on the real life of Adam Kashmiry, who also plays the lead. It’s about Adam trying to navigate the UK immigration system as a transgender asylum seeker from Egypt and it’s Intense, but so so good and beautifully shot. 1 hour)

Movies with cis people playing trans people

About kids “questioning” or “transitioning” / about the parents

3 Generations (no.)

Tomboy (I will watch this film, because I’ve heard it’s actually quite sympathetic and well-made)

Minor character is trans

Adam (2019) (so everything I’ve heard about this is bad. If I’m correct: Cis boy pretends he’s a trans boy in order to sleep with lesbians? Which is... wrong. On so many levels...)

Itty Bitty Titty Comittee (I’ll watch this at some point, it’s about lesbians and it’s by Jamie Babbit and I love But I’m A Cheerleader)

Tragedy

Boys Don’t Cry (lol, we all know this one)

Vera (this one was made in the 80s. so I might actually give it a go. I think it’s about a real person, which will at the very least will introduce me to a real trans person, even if it’s through a very distorted lens)

Misc cis actors

A good man (A trans guy offers to carry the baby, because his cis partner can’t. See this sounds so good, why not cast a trans guy in this? It doesn’t have good reviews)

Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls (even vaguer, it’s unclear if this character – who’s a villain – is a transgender woman or a transgender man)

Pierrot Lunaire (I will not watch this movie. I watched the trailer and... no. I recommend the trailer for anyone who wants to figure out if they want to watch this, because I think the aesthetics will be the breaking point. A cis girl introduces her trans boyfriend (who she doesnt know is trans) to her dad. He Suspects Something Is Up).

Two4One (uh, so it’s a comedy... I think it’s a cis guy playing the lead trans guy, so at least it got that part right. Idk I was just very uninspired by it, sorry, if anyone tells me it’s actually great I’ll eat these words).

Romeos (I was actually gonna watch this and then I read it’s just full of transphobia? Why would I subject myself to a bunch of that if it’s not even considered that good and there are no trans actors in it. Pass)

If there’re any beyond this, let me know. TV’s doing... so much better, truly fascinating how far behind film is lagging. 

[pompadorkery]

What do you mean you find it hard to relate to female characters. It's a fictional universe, you can make them anyway you want. Lucy is pretty feminine and Anglo too. I realize almost all the moms of your ocs are bad or thier children hate them. I understand that you have an abusive mom but do you really have to projected on every character you have. Do you have something against women or your just not attracted to them. Probably the latter because all of your ocs are sex dolls.

Wow. Where to even start with this one.

Why do you think the majority of Hollywood action heroes or video game protagonists are cis white males?

It's because it's the easiest to relate to for the biggest demographic of their audience.

Many anime have just a boring plain normie male protag for the same reason. They're supposed to be easily relatable, and like a blank slate that you can project on.

For me, female characters are hard to relate to.

Growing up, I never cared for female protags or love interest characters. And usually actively disliked them. (Much of this is because female characters are generally poorly written in alot of media, but that's besides the point)

I have never felt "in touch" with womanhood. I could never relate to female characters because none of them were like me, or had the same thoughts or struggles I had.

The female characters I like now are generally mold breaking. They don't fit in the typical box. And they give me something I can relate to.

For example:

Mako Mankanshoku from Kill la Kill. She's an absolute idiot and a total bimbo. She eats alot, she's loud, she's kinda useless at times, and she cares alot about her friends.

Satya "Symmetra" Vaswani from Overwatch. First of all, she's on the autism spectrum. She's rigid, stubborn, and can often come across as mean- but in reality she's just very goal oriented and likes things to be orderly.

While these are very different characters, I find alot of things in them that I can relate to and identify with. Not every aspect is true at all times, and there are plenty of things in their characters that I can't relate with, but regardless, there are aspects of myself that I can see in characters like them.

I've always related better to male characters. And like I said, much of the time female characters aren't written well, while the male characters are. I just always found them cooler. I liked their designs more, and they had more interesting stories. Whereas many female characters entire plot revolves around getting with the protag.

I've struggled with gender my entire life. I never felt like a girl. Even the people around me would say that I was such a "tomboy". I would often get told to dress more feminine, or that my haircut made me look like a boy, etc. One of my happiest moments as a teenager was when I got to play a male character in my high school's spring musical and during that entire time everyone referred to me in character, as a boy. I had a great time playing this character, and it really showed through in my performance. I was comfortable for once.

I identify as non-binary now, and I still have alot of questions about my own gender, and I'm still figuring alot of things out. But what I know for sure is that I'm not a girl.

Now, getting into my OCs.

You claim that all my OCs have troubled relationships with their moms, because I have a troubled relationship with my own mother.

2 of OCs.

2 of my OCs have mommy issues.

Out of all the characters I have, only 2 have issues with their mothers. So like, are you just pulling things out of your ass, or?

Lucy was abandoned by his mom at a young age and has alot of bitterness towards her because of this. Which is perfectly reasonable given the situation.

Sanka is just a brat. He still loves and cares about his mom, their relationship is just strained due to his own insecurities and self-loathing.

All my other characters either have no mother in the picture at all, or have perfectly fine and normal relationships with their moms.

Neither Sanka nor Lucy's moms are abusive. So it's pretty yikes of you to bring up my own abusive mother in this conversation. What are you trying to prove? In your concocted narrative, I'm writing characters with abusive moms because my mom was abusive and that's the only mother figure I know. So.... I'd be writing from experience.... in what world is that a bad thing?

You also mentioned Lucy and Angelo being feminine. "Feminine male" does not equal "woman". Those are two very different things. Just as a butch woman is not the same as a man. Experiences are completely different. Equating them is extremely sexist, and could be incredibly transphobic if you also think this way about real people.

And claiming I'm not attracted to women because my OCs are 'sex dolls'. Literally what are you even trying to get at? You do realize that real women and fictional characters are different, correct? Plenty of lesbians create stories or art about mlm characters. Plenty of lesbians draw gay porn. Are they not attracted to women because they draw men getting fucked?

I am bi. I also fall somewhere in the ace spectrum, due to alot of my own dysphoria. Of course I'm attracted to women. Real women are so incredibly sexy and beautiful and interesting. What isn't there to like? Just because I like making male characters doesn't somehow mean I hate women. I just haven't been able to create a fictional woman I find as interesting and captivating as real women are.

Also. I just enjoy drawing men. So a majority of my characters are gonna be men. Sue me. Sorry for enjoying myself.

And the whole "sex doll" comment. I answer the questions people ask. Which happens to be alot about sex. What can I say? People have cumbrain.

I'm also an nsfw artist. So obviously alot of the art I create is gonna be porn.

Is that the entire story of the characters? No, of course not! Do you think me and Ren would have enough storyline for an entire book if all the characters did was fuck? There's so much more to it than that. There's so much more that people don't see.

I mean, what's more interesting to see a drawing of:

Two characters in the heated embrace of love making

Or two characters sitting on the couch doing completely different mundane activities

There's a time and a place for everything, and sometimes drawing something simple and mundane is a fun look into a characters life.... But also I just like drawing dicks and the faces of people who are thoroughly wrecked.

Tl;dr- It's not that deep, fam.

[muppetsilas]

My Transitional Journey

I’m Silas. Nice to meet you. If you haven’t checked out my previous posts, check them out after this one if you’re interested.

I was born on a Tuesday. They called me a girl and names me a name that didn’t match who I’d grow up to be. It wasn’t a family name, just a notion, and my parents were disappointed with the genitalia I was born with, but proceeded to announce their new daughter.

When I was 6, I used to get in trouble at school for standing in the boys line. Apparently it was super important that everyone be separated by their private parts in the second grade, and Ms. Daphne at the private school in Santo Domingo got mad at me for standing in the “wrong” place. I begged and pleaded and eventually she let me stand wherever I wanted. Ms. Soto the following year in third grade was not as generous. I remember having to cry and beg her not to tell my parents. She didn’t at least, but she did get Ms. Daphne fired for allowing me to break the rules the previous year, and I had no concept of what that meant in grand scheme of things, being such a young age.

In middle school, I started wearing boys clothing exclusively (except for at church when I was forced into dresses and skirts) and was labeled a tomboy by pretty much everyone who met me. I’m sure that’s a familiar experience most trans men had growing up. Being the offspring of a Latina mother and a British father was a recipe for the ultimate application of gender roles.

I had never heard of a trans person in my life and would continue not to until well into my 20′s. When I did finally hear about a transgender person, they were being called slurs and mocked by movies and television, and were always played by masculine cis male actors in over the top make-up and dresses.

In college I came out as bisexual because I knew I didn’t care about who I dated, but I still didn’t know who I was. Later, at 22, I came out as a lesbian to my mother simply because I knew she wouldn’t understand what bi was, and I figured this way she’d be unsurprised if I ever brought a woman home, but super pleased if I came home with a man. The term lesbian felt wrong, so I used gay, but something still felt wrong.

That summer my mother caught me in bed with my girlfriend and that’s when I learned the depth of her ability to live in denial. After that, we just didn’t talk about it. Ever. Or anything really. Our conversations for the next decade would be mostly limited to the weather, recipes, and current events.

In my late 20′s, after travelling all over the world, I finally started to get to know myself and after settling down in SC, found an amazing group online called the Gender Benders. It was recommended to me by four different people before I even know I was trans. The dean of my college was one of them. Talk about me being oblivious.

Long story short, I finally figured out the last piece of my puzzle and everything clicked. For the first time in my life I didn’t feel out of place or lost or like something was missing.

Three years later I wrote a letter to come out to my parents and began my real life. I had thought about putting it off until they died (literally) but I realized that I couldn’t really begin my life as who I really am until I told them. That was a long and arduous “coming to terms” process for all of us that I’m sure I’ll get into in a later post.

I’m excited to share more of my story with you and to hear from you all!

^Isn’t it strange how every trans person looks way better once they have transitioned? You can tell that things are right then.^

[vegannaise]

boys deserve love

i started realizing around 16 that i wasn’t cis. i flipflopped back and forth between different nonbinary identities, occasionally wondering (in private) if i was just simply a boy. i was already out as gay, and people already regarded me as a “tomboy”, so that helped alleviate some of my teenage discomfort.

I didn’t date a lot in highschool, partially because i was incredibly intimated by girls, partially because boys didnt pay too much romantic attention to me, and probably a little bit because i had 0 interest in sex all throughout my teenage years.

when i was 17 i had my first “serious” relationship. it was with a boy that coerced me into hooking up with him while i was nearly black out drunk (wow,, what a catch right???!!! thats a whole different story). as sad as this is, i finally felt like my existence was valid. i felt like i had finally achieved this unspoken goal of having someone love me in a romantic way, having someone find me desirable. i was happy for the first time in years.

of course, i was still trans and in the closet during all of this. one night, i was completely swallowed by my dysphoria. i was either on the floor or in front of the mirror crying because of how my body looked. i even ended up giving myself a stick n poke to avoid self harming. Mason (boy in question) was texting me throughout this, i think i had told him i wasn’t feeling good, but i didn’t want to tell him why. he eventually pressured me into telling him what was wrong, and i told him “i dont like my body. i want my body to be a different body. i want to have a BOYS body”.

for just a second, i pictured myself years in the future with a flat chest and stubble and a deep voice, my arms around Mason, who still loved me even though he was “straight” and i had transitioned.

sadly, this fantasy was violently ripped away as soon as i came back to reality. Mason had responded with clear discomfort, saying he wasn’t gay. i told him i knew he wasn’t gay, but wouldn’t he still love me for me??? i would still be the same person, so wouldn’t he still love me????? to which he prompty responded, firmly and bluntly, that if i were to transition and call myself a boy, he would break up with me.

this experience made me go back into the closet for 2 years.

fast forward to when i was 19, i was in a relationship with a transguy. since i grew up in a tiny homophobic town i was never able to date another trans person, and most likely put this person (lets call them...... Pickle) on a big ol’ pedestal because of that. Pickle had been out as trans for almost 5 years, and had been on T almost just as long. they were the first person to tell me that nonbinary people can be trans. they were the first person to actually make me feel seen and valid as not only a trans person, but as a boy.

i ended up coming out to them, in tears, as a transguy. i still felt really confused, i was a boy but didnt really feel connecting to masculinity. i wanted nothing more than to be a pretty boy but recoiled at seeing myself as a Man™. even though that relationship was incredibly toxic, Pickle supported me unconditionally through getting on hormones, they even bought me a new binder. they were the support i had desperately needed.

we had been dating for 8 months when i left town for a few days. something seemed off when i would text them, it felt like something was wrong, but they werent telling me what. Pickle was staying with me at the time, so i saw them as soon as i came back. they said they had something to tell me.

they told me that while i was out of town, they had had a major identity crisis, and realized that she was actually a butch lesbian. of course, i gave her a giant hug, i told her i loved her and that i was so happy she had figured this out about herself. thats when she started talking about us.

she told me that since she was a lesbian and i was a boy, we had to break up; as if this shouldve been obvious to me...... it wasn’t. as she sat there telling me things like “i still love you” and “and i wish things could be different” we both cried. a lot. i still couldnt wrap my head around what was happening. here she was, telling me she wishes things were different so we can be together, why couldnt we just be together as is??? if you want to be with someone, why does it matter if they’re a boy or a girl??? especially when you’ve already been together for 8 months??? it felt like it had a lot more to do with other peoples perceptions of us, it wasn’t because i was a boy, it was because she didnt think she’d be seen as a lesbian dating a genderqueer boy.

the next day i confronted her about this. i was so confused, i had given myself a headache and multiple panic attacks trying to figure out what the fuck i was feeling. she told me that she felt like we should break up anyway, that her realizing shes a lesbian was just “the final nail in the coffin”. i found myself even more hurt and confused than before. id told Pickle all about Mason, how i went back in the closet because i was scared of him leaving me. i told her about all the shame i had accumulated over the course of my relationship with Mason. despite her knowing all this, she still decided to scapegoat our own identities, rather than just own up to the fact that our relationship was falling apart already.

this experience made me question my entire identity, the identity i had JUST started feeling valid in. this experience made me eventually stop taking hormones. this experience made me feel more invaild and undesirable than ever before.

during this time, i started to also ID myself as a (nonbinary) lesbian. i had felt my attraction to men dwindle, and i was grappling with my attraction to women. but more than anything else, i convinced myself that being a boy = being hated. looking “like a boy” = being ugly and undesirable. not only did this feed into terf rhetoric, but its a result of being told my whole life that my worth is directly tied to my level of attractiveness, and that no one would find me attractive if i looked the way i wanted to.

it felt so much easier to stay how i was. all i wanted was to be seen as queer, and since people already read me as a lesbian, i might as well just settle for that, right? at least people would get it. at least people would see me.

i’m 22 now, and ive really only just started to deconstruct these things and unlearn my internalized transphobia and self hatred. about 6 months ago i started calling myself a boy and using he/him pronouns again, and for once i actually feel safe. for once i actually have a good support network. for once i actually feel seen. for once i actually feel loved.

to anyone who actually bothered to read this all the way through: healing is not linear and our identities sure as shit arent. if you’re in the closet right now, or if you’re questioning your gender/sexuality for the first or fifth or tenth time: i see you. i love you. you are so valid in your fear and confusion. the world still actively hates LGBT people, and that internalized fear is so real and deserves to be acknowledged, but please believe me when i say that there ARE people out there who hold the deepest love, appreciation, and camaraderie for you, even if you dont know them yet. your existence as an LGBT person in this world is inherently radical, please don’t ever forget that.

[bitchin-b33]

Pride Art

I’m trans, and I’m bisexual. It’s been a long journey discovering who I was, and how I fit into places I once thought I didn’t. I’ll be the first to admit that my journey to find myself was a very rocky road filled with questions, confusion, and a general sense of feeling I had to rebuild who I thought I was after finding out things that overrode my sense of identity before.  I first found out I was bisexual when I was playing a game, and someone said something about being a lesbian. I was a small bean and didn’t know what that was, and so I asked (I had no impulse control back then) and the girl told me. I then realized I had liked girls before, and more than in a friend sort of way, more in the way I had seen my dad and mom acted, in love. I started questioning myself, but the thing was that I had also liked boys like that too. I was so confused and lost, I thought I had to choose one. Like boys, or like girls. I thought I couldn’t like both until another girl (Or I assume girl, they had a female avatar) said something about being bi, and again I was confused about what that meant. And she told me, and then everything clicked into place. I wasn’t confused anymore, and I realized I didn’t have to chose to like only boys or girls. I could find love with both, and it made me happy no matter how much it shook my world. I was twelve at the time.  Then sometime later I started... developing. At first, I was okay with the changes, I had wanted them in the past. But soon, that all changed as I slowly started yearning more and more for what the boys at school looked like. I wished I could be more like them, but I stuffed it down and chalked it up to me always being a tomboy (although I had once heard about intersex people and people who were thought to be a girl before puberty and then come to find out they were a boy. I wished that would happen to me all the time, so it wasn’t out of place. I had always wanted to be a boy, I thought it was normal.) though less than two years later I found Kalvin Garrah, Sam Collins, and other various trans youtubers. When they talked about their identities I couldn’t help but feel connected to them on some level. Then, I started questioning but I had very little dysphoria that would barely act up and so I thought maybe I was NB, but that didn’t work. Then I thought I might be Genderfluid bc it seemed my dysphoria waned (And tbh, it still does, but I’ve heard it does that with a lot of people sooooo) and I kept trying to come up with other things it could be. I didn’t want to admit I might be trans, I was scared. I came up with the worst reasoning I could have.  “I like pink and girly things.’

“I wanted to look like this, and I got what I wanted.” On and on, until I couldn’t take it anymore. It was eating me inside out until I told a friend and she started talking to me. She was all but unaccepting, she took my hand and stride in stride we figured out my identity together. I have so many thanks I need to give her for helping me how she did. I came out to my dad, who was accepting. Though I was still young by most standards, and he wanted me to think it through. Know what I was getting into so I wouldn’t regret it just in case it was a phase. So I tried to forget. I drowned it out again, and it got worse and worse. I eventually told him again and that I had made a decision. He’s still slighting in a “denial” as I call it. (He accepts and supports me, but he doesn’t really understand.) So I’ve been out ever since then, and I couldn’t be happier. I look how I want to, I might be able to talk my dad into letting me go on T, and a bunch of people knows who I am. (Not everyone, but I plan on making sure that changes.)  So since my art has closely been tied into my identity, I made a pride piece. It’s a bunch of personified pride flags, and while it took a while of explaining to even get to the art, I want to finally be proud of my identity. Even if it hurts to be trans, and even if I’m not as proud of it as others as I wish more than anything to be cis (Either by my birth gender or by the gender I am.) I would have always been apart of the LGBT+ community, and I wouldn’t want that to change for the world. I have met so many good friends out of support groups, fan groups, and just being an LGBT+ online presence (More on amino though) and I love each and every one of them. So this piece is to show my thanks to the community for being here and never standing down for our rights to be ourselves. I can only assume many more good things are in store for me, and this piece represents that. I thank all of you, and I hope you’ve had a happy pride month!

[wingwaver]

I wanna take a minute to talk about how I feel when it comes to my own gender and sexuality. I'm not to great at explaining things though so bare with me I guess.

I guess I'll start off with the fact that, even a child, I always hated having a vagina and when I found out that "boys" were born with something different I was envious. It especially got worse when I started getting my period around 10 years old and was told that "boys" don't have to go through that (I know now that that's false of course because trans boys and men have periods) so when I was kid I HATED being a girl and had often wished that I had been born a boy instead.

When I was little I refused to wear dresses, or like anything considered too girly. I was considered a "tomboy" and loved baggy boys clothes and things considered "boys things" instead of "girl things" (save for BRATZ, Polly Pocket, and Barbie I fuckin loved those).

I would often get mistaken for a boy and get called "he" and while some didn't notice the "mistake" at first someone would always point out "no she's a girl". Getting called "he" never felt insulting though, it felt good. I didn't (and still don't) mind being called "she" but "he" never made me feel bad. It was everyone else that made a big deal about it and I never understood why.

Some could say a lot of that was internalized sexism (and yeah I'll admit some of it was). Just a few years ago I finally started embracing my femininity, I actually started liking wearing dresses and skirts and now love the color pink and I like wearing revealing clothes from time to time. And for a while I was content that way, but then people expected me to be feminine all the time and the magic of finally being a girl/woman wore off.

But now I feel good doing both. I'll dress "feminine" some days and "masculine" some days or a lil mix of both. And yeah, everyone can do that because clothes don't actually have gender but it feels good to finally be able to have a "middle ground" and realize that I don't have to be seen as "just" a woman or man.

Now, I didn't learn about non binary genders or the fact that you could use other pronouns or even more than one set of pronouns until a few years ago as an adult because I grew up in one of those kind of Christian homes (you know, where gay and trans people are the boogeyman). I had no idea that agender (which is how I feel most of the time) or genderfluid were terms to describe oneself with. And honestly, I'm not sure I'd wanted to learn it sooner because of the home I grew up in but I am so glad I know about them now because I know they're good terms to describe how I feel about my gender.

While I do still sometimes wish I had been born with a penis I don't always feel like a man. Nor do I always feel like a woman. Sometimes I'll feel like I'm one or the other but most of the time I'm just like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ when it comes to my gender.

Now as for the topic of dysphoria, I still get a little confused when it comes to the term but I'm pretty sure I feel it. I don't hate my boobs but I do get jealous that cis men can just walk around shirtless whenever and sometimes I do wish my chest was flat sometimes but honestly I couldn't care less whether they stay or go, but I still HATE having a vagina! Personally, if it were possible, I'd rather have no genitalia at all, and it makes me sad that my body has to have one or the other (or both but I don't think anyone has ever had surgery to have both??? I know people can be born with both though). My vagina causes me a lot of distress and I think I may someday end up getting surgery to have a penis instead. It's up to future me to figure that out and make the step though cause I'm not in a place safe enough to come out or have the surgery yet.

Now for my sexuality. I'm asexual. I know this as a fact because I'm not interested in people the same way most others are. I use the split attraction model but it still feels off sometimes when describing romantic attraction because I'm still unsure if I feel any form of attraction to real people. Right now I base my romantic attraction on fictional crushes and I've been attracted to characters of all genders. When it comes to real people I can say that I do find women and non-binary people more appealing than men, and in fiction I'm usually attracted to more men, so for now I go by Bi-romantic.

I also want to state that, yes, I am sex-repulsed, but it has nothing to do with me being asexual. Me being asexual just means that I don't feel sexual attraction. In fact sex-repulsion has nothing to do with asexuality at all. Plenty of people are repulsed by sex no matter who they are or aren't attracted to. Some lesbians are sex-repulsed, some bi people are, some gay men are, some pan people are, even some straight people are. Sex-repulsion has nothing to do with who you're attracted to it had to do with how you feel about sex and people can be sex-repulsed for a number of reasons.

For me, personally, I'm pretty sure mine has to do with dysphoria and how society depicts sex. When I found out about sex as a teen I was curious but ultimately decided that wasn't ever for me. When society tends to describe sex to people with vaginas they say that sex will hurt the first time and that it'll hurt sometimes after that but ultimately leads to pleasure. NO THANKS. I know now, after listening to people who have had it, that that isn't true. Sure it will hurt for some people (there's even a thing some people have where sex will always hurt I forgot the disease name though) but if you are doing it right there won't be any pain. Still, the damage is...kinda done with me. Me not wanting a vagina to begin with coupled with mainstream society's explanations on vaginal sex has made me deathly afraid of having anything in my vagina, I can't even use tampons, the thought of it nearly gives me a panic attack and I internally flipped out when my doctor suggested a pap smear (thankfully he said it was ultimately my decision to have or not have one since I'm not sexually active, though I do think I'm gonna try to because I know it's super important).

I also think that some abuse I've been through factors into my feelings towards sex but that's a whole other can of worms for different day.

And before I end this already too long post I'd like to bring up names. I have always hated the name my parents gave me but everytime I brought it up everyone was like "it's a pretty name though!" and fine if you think that whatever but it's never felt like MY name, it's never felt like ME. I don't mind the nickname that came from it (Liss) because it feels like a different name all together to me so I prefer when my family and other people use it over my full first name. I also really like the name Elias, or Lias for a nickname, they feel more natural to me and like they describe me (does that make sense???), and they make me feel like the person is actually referring to the real me so once I get the chance I'll probably change my legal name to Elias someday.

Anyway I'm gonna stop here because this became longer than I thought it'd be but I felt like I needed to get some of this out ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[nonbinarypastels]

About & FAQ Page

This page was last updated on July 31, 2018

About nonbinarypastels

This blog was created to combat REG (reactionary, exclusionist, gatekeeping) politics in the LGBTQIA+ community as well as other forms of harmful conservative rhetoric that’s become so common on tumblr through the spreading of positivity and information based posts. My goal for this blog is not only to validate and support LGBTQIA+ people (and people of all marginalized identities) but also to encourage people to be more accepting of others, more able to think critically about all issues, and more passionate about making a positive difference not only in their own lives but the lives of those around them.

What I post about

Positivity — Not only nonbinary positivity but positivity for all  LGBTQIA+ identities and other people as well.

Social Justice/Politics

Mental Health/Mental Illness

Critical Thinking Skills

Fandom/Media

Miscellaneous Other Topics

If you’re only here for positivity

Please blacklist the #not positivity and #discourse tw tags.

Things you should know before you follow this blog

This blog is inclusionist. I believe that all aromantics and asexuals belong in the LGBTQIA+ community. I’m also firmly against other exclusionary rhetoric that seeks to exclude any non-cishet (by which I mean non cisgender, heteromantic, AND heterosexual) group from the community.

This blog supports creative freedom and a safe fandom environment. I don’t care what kind of fiction people write/read or what they ship as long as all of their content is tagged properly and kept in appropriate spaces. While I think media criticism and having civil discussions about what we’re writing and reading and why is a good thing, I think the ‘anti’ community on tumblr totally crosses the line with their behavior which goes beyond legitimate media criticism and straight into cyberbullying and harassment.

This blog does not support radical feminism. Radical feminism is a harmful conservative movement that harms and attempts to control the lives of marginalized people. I do not support any form of radfem rhetoric.

This blog does not support trasnmedicalsim or truscum. These are groups that actively harm trans and nonbinary people by pushing reductionist, transphobic rhetoric and policing the identities of trans and nonbinary people.

This blog is queer positive. I will not censor the word queer or exclude queer people from this blog or the community.

Please do not send me messages

About any medical or life-threatening emergencies you might be having. I am not a doctor and cannot give medical advice and there’s also no guarantee I’ll be online when you send your message. If you’re in a life-threatening situation please contact the relevant local authorities (either 911 or your country’s equivalent) or get to a hospital immediately.

Calling out people I reblog from or who are reblogging from me about anything having to do with ships or fanfiction. As stated above, I don’t care what people ship or write/read as long as it’s properly tagged and not posted in inappropriate spaces. Any messages I get about “so-and-so ships ___” will be deleted.

About anything having to do with MAP discourse. I am a CSA survivor and am generally not comfortable discussing or reading about MAPs.

Telling me that a-specs “aren’t actually lgbt” or anything similar. You will automatically be blocked for being an aphobe.

Saying there are only two genders. You will automatically be blocked for being boring.

Asking me questions that have already been answered on this page. I made this FAQ for a reason. Any asks I get containing questions that I’ve already answered (or asking for definitions of terms that are listed in the glossary) will be deleted.

———————————————————————————— General Questions Do you have a question about what a certain term means?

Please check the glossary page to see if I have a definition already listed. If the term you’re looking for is not in the glossary, please feel free to send me an ask about it.

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/172930687066/glossary-page

Are you feeling down and need to be cheered up?

Please check the self care tag for posts you might find helpful.

http://www.nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/tagged/self+care

Why do you put image descriptions on your posts?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/165370079304/can-i-ask-why-you-provide-image-descriptions-i

Who is that in your icon?

Deadpool from Marvel comics

Icon by http://www.wadewicons.tumblr.com/

Do you take requests?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/172930396816/requests-page

Who are you/what is your main blog?

Considering how nasty I’ve seen discourse about the identities I’m trying to provide positivity for get and the things I’ve seen other blogs similar to this one having to deal with, I’m not comfortable disclosing the link to my main blog. I value my privacy and my safety and I hope my followers can respect that.

What are your pronouns?

Any pronouns other than it/itself are okay. I have no other preferences.

Are you a minor?

No.

Can people who aren’t nonbinary interact with this blog? Can cis people?

Anyone, nonbinary or not, is allowed to follow nonbinarypastels and reblog from us. Not only am I okay with cis people following this blog and reblogging from it, I 100% encourage them to do so. I think it’s important that not only do LGBTQIA+ people support ourselves and those who ID the same as us but that we support people of different identities and just as much I also think it’s vital for cis people to show that they support us. I think cis people reblogging positivity posts for people who aren’t cis is an excellent way to show that.

Can I interact with this blog if my blog is about ___?

I don’t care if your tumblr is 99% cute crayon drawings of pretty flowers or drawings of kinky furry porn, if you like the posts here or need them or want to spread the positivity with your followers I have no problem with you following + reblogging from this blog.

Can I share your posts on other sites?

Feel 100% free to share my posts on Twitter, Facebook, or other social media. Credit + a link back is appreciated but it’s not required. However, please do NOT upload my posts to sites such as redbubble, storeenvy, or other sites where you’ll be selling them to others.

Can I use your posts in moodboards/aesthetics posts?

Yes!

Where do you get the pictures for your image posts?

https://www.pexels.com/

http://www.unsplash.com

Why the pineapples?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/168615228296/hello-ive-noticed-your-recent-posts-about

——————————————————————————- Call Me Out Would you like to tell me that the term ‘a-spec’ was stolen from autistics and that it’s problematic to use it to refer to ace/aro people?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/162255685756/hey-idk-if-you-were-aware-of-this-but-you-have-a

Would you like to tell me to stop including the ‘I’ in the LGBTQIA+ acronym?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/161388049611/you-do-realize-that-like-a-lot-of-intersex-people

Would you like to tell me that butch and femme are lesbian-specific words and no one else has the right to use them?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169789232996/nonbinarypastels-since-i-keep-getting-anons-wrt

Would you like to tell me not to use queer as an umbrella term?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/165557176711/hey-uh-sorry-if-this-is-too-much-to-ask-but-dont

Why are you intolerant towards conservatives?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169509757921/being-an-intolerant-jerk-about-conservatives-and

—————————————————————————– Questioning Do you have tips for figuring out your gender identity?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160444273391/any-tips-to-give-to-help-someone-to-figure-out

Is it okay to use they/them pronouns if I’m still questioning my gender and might be cis?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/162316760041/i-feel-comfy-using-theythem-but-i-dont-know-if-im

I want to question my gender but I’m afraid I’m faking it all?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169375568051/hi-i-always-thought-i-was-a-cis-guy-but-ive

———————————————————————————– About Being Trans + Nonbinary Are nonbinary people trans?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160443055731/do-you-consider-nb-to-be-a-part-of-the-trans

Am I still agender if I have feminine interests/hobbies?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/159863843416/i-identify-as-agender-but-i-also-like-girl

Can you be lunarian and agender?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/159119628926/can-i-be-a-lunarian-agender-or-does-that-like

How do you deal with nbphobia?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/161289280081/tw-transphobia-tw-ableist-slur-tw-r-word-do

What do I do if my friends are nbphobic?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/161290197211/one-of-my-best-friends-is-a-radical-feminist-i

What’s the difference between being nonbinary and being a tomboy?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170485614676/im-having-a-mild-identity-crisis-whats-the

Can you be nonbinary and prefer she/her or he/him pronouns?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170449570882/hi-im-someone-who-identifies-as-non-binary-ive

Are nonbinary people to blame for trans people not being taken seriously?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/161287284091/how-do-you-respond-to-people-who-say-nbs-are-the

How do I deal with people saying nonbinary people are responsible for trans people being made fun of?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/167977849726/hey-i-got-some-really-messed-up-enbyphobic-anon

Is trans day of visibility for nonbinary people too?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/159055092686/sorry-if-this-is-stupid-is-trans-day-of

Is there any proof there are more than two genders?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170985650804/sgaprivilege-sonoanthony-hatingongodot

Do you think it’s fetishizing for people to say they’re attracted to nonbinary people?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170815582801/whats-your-take-on-the-claim-that-mlnbwlnb-are

Am I still trans/nonbinary if I didn’t always know from a young age?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169845692030/hi-okay-so-im-trans-nonbinary-and-i-noticed-that

Am I still nonbinary if I never want to come out?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169159856571/can-i-still-be-nb-if-i-dont-plan-on-coming-out-to

How do I overcome internalized nbphobia?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169128988716/do-you-have-any-tips-on-overcoming-internalized

What can I call the nonbinary person I’m dating other than boyfriend/girlfriend?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/164729025088/hi-i-dont-know-if-you-guys-answer-questions-but

What’s your opinion on “there are only two genders” jokes?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169533948384/hey-i-was-wondering-if-you-might-be-able-to-give

Who is allowed to ID as nblm/nblw/nblnb? Do I have to have a certain alignment to ID with these terms?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/175370970607/hi-im-a-asexual-biromantic-agender-person-and

———————————————————————————- About Presentation + Dysphoria

Do you have any tips for dealing with dysphoria?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171870400516/urgent-im-a-non-passing-pre-everything-trans

What’s the difference between social dysphoria and body dysphoria?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171770067231/whats-the-difference-between-social-dysphoria-and

How can I write about trans/nonbinary characters who have dysphoria?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/163261302706/hello-there-nonbinary-questioning-black-anon

How can I bind safely if I can’t afford to buy a binder?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160277656876/hello-i-came-here-because-i-wanted-to-ask-if-you

Do you have any advice about buying your first binder?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171412780521/advice-for-somebody-who-is-getting-their-first

How can I look more androgynous?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160850193236/do-you-have-any-advice-for-nonbinary-teens-who

Is it normal to want top surgery but not want to take T?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/168600610588/is-it-normal-for-a-nonbinary-person-to-want-top

What can I do if I hate my voice?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169110950161/hey-i-am-non-binary-and-14-years-old-i-was

I want to change my hair but I’m afraid people will hate it?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/166569911301/hey-i-recently-came-out-as-non-binary-i-really

—————————————————————————— About Sexuality How can you be sex-repulsed without being asexual?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/159348049986/how-can-you-be-sex-repulsed-but-not-asexual

Can you be in a queerplatonic relationship if you’re not ace/aro?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171758800972/can-you-have-a-qpr-if-youre-not-acearo

What’s the difference between demisexuality and regular attraction?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160198336046/whats-the-differrence-between-demisexual-and-just

Is pansexuality transphobic/biphobic?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160201643591/hi-i-just-want-to-tell-that-i-heard-someone-say

Do bisexuals have straight-passing privilege?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/163139939492/hey-there-i-was-wondering-if-you-can-help-me

Can you be asexual and still like masturbation?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171408739131/so-i-was-wondering-could-you-be-asexual-and

Can you be wlw and mlm at the same time?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171269548272/hi-im-confused-this-is-a-genuine-question-pls

Can you be nblw, nblm, and nblnb at the same time?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171158368762/i-identify-as-a-nblw-nblnb-and-nblm-is-that

How can lesbians use he/him pronouns?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170496057755/this-is-an-ignorant-question-so-i-apologize

What is the split attraction model?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169931000321/hello-i-was-reading-that-post-about-asexual-stuff

———————————————————————— About Coming Out

Are you looking for coming out tips and encouragement? Please check my coming out tag!

http://www.nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/tagged/coming+out

Is it okay to come out to my friends before my family?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160086167706/i-am-trans-and-came-out-to-one-of-my-friends-who

How do I explain being nonbinary to my parents when they just don’t get it?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/168598203993/ive-accepted-im-nonbinary-and-my-parents-know

Do you have any advice for coming out as nonbinary?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171342286106/hey-any-advice-on-how-to-come-out-to-my-dad-as

How do I come out to my parents?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170782185301/hi-i-identify-is-non-binary-and-i-know-for-sure

How do I get my parents to use my name/pronouns and accept me?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/168598203993/ive-accepted-im-nonbinary-and-my-parents-know

——————————————————————————

Fandom & Fandom Discourse Related

What is an anti?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171868269706/what-is-an-anti-i-had-always-heard-that-anti

What have antis ever done wrong?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171966569929/shipping-isnt-morality-block-report-program

How can I deal with antis who are harassing me?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171974140371/hi-sorry-to-bother-you-i-was-looking-through

Do you support pedophilic ships?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170196527876/wait-you-support-pedophilic-ships-thats-gross

What’s your opinion about MAP discourse?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171209629491/so-what-do-you-think-of-maps-then-the-ones-who

If you’re not a bad person, why do you like bad things in fiction?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/164750728921/about-your-post-on-how-liking-certain-fiction

What is purity culture?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169710243376/do-you-know-whenhowwhy-purity-culture-started

What is your opinion on RPF?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/175123194126/i-wasnt-able-to-find-anything-on-your-blog-about

What is fujoshi discourse?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/174877862940/i-just-saw-someone-reference-fake-fujoshi-blogs

——————————————————————— Misc. How do you handle ignorance?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/160627538536/how-do-you-handle-ignorance-im-too-scared-to

What’s an invisible disability?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/163099887223/hey-i-have-a-quick-question-whats-an-invisible

What is TERF/radfem rhetoric?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/169015697831/on-radfemreg-rhetoric

How do I know if I have an eating disorder?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171664946546/ed-tw-i-guess-mmmm-since-i-was-young-ive

What’s the difference between being squicked and being triggered?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/171341992144/um-so-ive-been-wondering-if-feeling-physically

How do you deal with bigots?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170516017459/exposure-to-identities-really-is-the-best-way-to

Why can’t someone be both anti-SWERF and anti-kink?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/170011993907/hey-quick-q-feel-free-to-ignore-but-i-had-a-post

When was gay used as a slur?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/166431435436/hello-i-just-saw-your-post-that-i-think-was-from

How do you find out about the free samples you post?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/163522947367/hey-this-isnt-about-anything-nonbinary-but-i-was

What is your opinion on self-diagnosis?

http://nonbinarypastels.tumblr.com/post/175045406707/what-are-your-thoughts-on-self-diagnosis-ive-been

[sareally]

What’s my sin? “You’re ruining our family. Hindi ka ganyan.”

By: Ginny Puno

These words have changed myself dramatically. It has been hard for me to talk about this specific instance in my life. However, when I was asked to discuss a phrase or sentence that significantly affected my identity today, I could not help but recall these striking words uttered by my mom. In tears, she tells me, “You’re ruining our family.”

To put things into perspective, my mom told this to me when I was a third year high school student – still trying to figure out who I was in this world. With the growing availability of media at this point in time, I can say that my discovery of myself was also shaped by the information I was exposed to. As someone who was extremely fond of YouTube, I had come across certain viral videos of people coming out to their parents in a creative and touching way. Similarly, I was growing to like even more gay personalities like Tyler Oakley, Joey Graceffa, and Hannah Hart who proudly flaunted their sexual orientation. Even in the environment I was working in, I would see that most of my peers had developed an acceptance of homosexuality. More and more lesbian couples emerged within my school, people started developing their own “girl crushes”, and I would hear more frequent discussions on homosexuality. With all this considered, I started to question my own sexuality too.

Long story short, these events led me to having my first relationship with a girl and for some strange reason, my parents found out about it. This leads us to my mom accusing me of destroying the family. It boggled me at that time to think that my self-exploration was destructive to my family - that my own efforts in trying to figure out who I really am were in fact detrimental to my own family, whom I love and care for.

This experience still brings numerous questions to my mind today. It makes me question if it really was a conscious decision for me to identify as a cis-gendered female or if this was simply brought about by my fear of losing my family. I am certain that there is no greater love I possess than my love for my family. Did this, then, get in the way of me truly knowing myself? Of me truly discovering who I was at my core? This internal struggle I’m experiencing further stresses how my parents have become identity agents in my life. Identity agents are defined as individuals who participate in the formation of a youth’s identity. Through the entire process of trying to make sense of this new relationship I was in, it became even more evident to me how my parents were my identity agents. Upon learning that I had expressed my attraction towards the same sex, my parents could simply have let it slide. They could have let it go. However, they didn’t. They saw this new development as a threat to my overall identity. When I would ask them to explain to me why they expressed so much disdain, they would bring up issues on religion – saying that what I was doing was a grave sin against the Lord.

Ever since I was little, my parents have instilled in us this appreciation for religion. We would go to mass as often as we can and not simply reach the bare minimum of attending mass every Sunday. My father would force us to go through the sacrament of confession every month, even if we didn’t want to. From these instances alone, I see that my parents want me to grow up to be a religious person – swearing by the Bible and its teachings. Part of the identity they were forming for me was a Roman Catholic girl who would do anything for and by the church. I would say that I still aim somewhat religious and I still actively practice my religion. However, when I realized that the church was hindering my self-discovery, I started to question this. I started to ask, “How would such a religious and ‘holy’ institution shun me for simply expressing my love for someone?” I knew that I was doing nobody harm by being with my significant other at the time. I was simply acting on whatever feelings I had possessed. So, what is my sin? Here, I was faced with individuation.

Individuation is an important milestone in the development of adolescents. Individuals slowly let go of their strong attachments to the teachings of those perceived to be above them, like my parents or the church, and they start to see value in the formation of their own opinions and criticisms. My own assessment of the situation, especially with how my parents introduced me to the church, has led me to be more knowledgeable today. Without undergoing this event in my life, I would probably not question the church and its functions. Now, however, I do see that even the church system is flawed. That even issues like capitalism and corruption can penetrate such a holy organization. Going back, the way I was at the brink of losing my privilege to be worthy of love and acceptance simply because I chose to love someone of the same sex allowed me to question my parents and the church.

It is important to note, however, that although individuation is necessary, it can still be destructive if not carried out properly. There is a way to have healthy individuation in relationships – which I also realized at that time. Individuation does not end with concepts of rebellion or individuality alone, it must be paired with connectedness for it to be helpful in the growth of an individual. In my case, although I did question my parents, I did see their point. Aside from religious concerns, my parents also brought up some other issues on my young age, my limited environment, and “trends” and this allowed me to also question if my feelings were valid. Of course, I still asserted my own views, however, I still saw the value in respecting their side of the story. This consideration of their ideas against my sexual orientation helped me further assess myself. I now identify as straight, however, this does not invalidate the fact that I did feel what I felt and that I used to be bisexual. Although I identify differently now, I always go back to my experience as someone who was bisexual and I have used this to further understand the sentiments and struggles of other people.

Along with the words my parents had against me having a different sexual orientation were questions. “Hindi ka naman tomboy, bakit ka ganyan?” another interesting phrase I heard from them was, “Diba crush mo si James Reid? Paano nangyari ‘to?” I realized that gender stereotypes are not limited to just male or female stereotypes. Even with the members of the LGBT community, there are stereotypes that hinder them from expressing themselves freely. Just because I did not act, dress, or look like a boy, my parents immediately put the possibility of me being anything other than straight out of the picture. I am also, admittedly, a very “kikay” person who was fond of things normally perceived as girly. However, this should not limit me as someone who would be straight.

Another popular example that shows this was how Pia Wurtzbach stated, in an interview, that she would love for her son to be gay so that he could do her hair and make-up. Moreover, Moira de la Torre’s song entitled “Titibo-tibo” talked about how the persona in the song acted like a boy and this was immediately associated with the term “tibo”. As someone who did not fall under a certain stereotype as bisexual, it was hard for me to fully express myself as such. I knew that because I did not fall under certain physical qualifications, I may be questioned on my sexual orientation – and this is exactly what happened with my parents. It is important, then, to educate people to be more accepting to allow for authenticity to prevail.

Additionally, I believe that the propagation of social media and the internet has allowed for these stereotypes to dominate certain cultures. Although social media is a great platform for educating oneself on our modern world, we must also be careful to filter out the things we see. For example, my parents are also increasing their personal usage of social media. With this, they are exposed to even more members of the LGBT community and have learned more on this topic. However, instead of teaching them to be more accepting, certain portrayals of the LGBT community online have led them to further stereotype people and to box them within certain definitions. My mom, for example, is very fond of humorous gay comedians online and is fond of watching videos on Facebook of gay individuals dancing, doing splits, and doing death drops. However, this has limited her to seeing gay men as just feminine, when in fact, there are gay men who do not possess feminine qualities.

Although it is true that social networks have brought about various platforms for people to express themselves, it will only be effective if we educate ourselves as much as we can, and this includes going beyond what is said online and experiencing the real world. I have realized that the beauty about gender expression and identity is that it can never be put into a single definition. We live in a day and age where people are realizing more and more about themselves and are not afraid to break away from the definitions set by society. Similarly, I have undergone this entire process of discovering myself and building my identity. I know that there are some people who do not believe that sexual orientations can change, but I’ll be proud to tell them that that is not the case. Here, we go back to the importance of connectedness in healthy individuation. This calls for us to not end with critiquing and questioning things, but with creating healthy discourse and listening to multiple sides before arriving to a conclusion. Hopefully, more and more people can engage in these kinds of conversations for us to be able to build a healthy and accepting world.

SOURCES:

Schacter, E., & Ventura, J. (2008). Identity agents: Parents as active and reflective participants in their children’s identity formation. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 18(3), 449-476.

Moore, S. & Rosenthal, D. (2007). Gender, sexuality and romance. In Sexuality in Adolescence: Current Trends (Ch. 6 pp. 132-155). New York, NY: Routledge.

Grotevant, H., & Cooper, C. (1985). Patterns of Interaction in Family Relationships and the Development of Identity Exploration in Adolescence. Child Development, 56(2), 415-428. doi:10.2307/1129730

[i-bounced-byeeee]

Man I remember when I tried to come out someone they were like

"No you're not!"

And these were their reasons why i wasnt (bonus my refutation)

1. I was a girly kid, I didnt have a tomboy phase.

- about that, I was very much encouraged to like girly things. I remember very well once when I was maybe 4 or 5 years old, I saw either my brothers or my sister get cars for their birthday and wishing that cars were "girl toys too"

2. I liked girly stuff too much.

- I dont have to be a woman ur woman identifying to enjoy traditionally feminine things like glittery stuff, sparkles jewelry, nail polish, longer hair, and cute stuff like stuffed animals and the like. I still enjoy these things and me being trans doesnt have to change that, although I do shy away from it sometimes because I dont want my gender identity to be invalidated or to be misgendered.

3. "You like your boobs too much!!"

- (yes this was a real phrase someone said to me)

ABOUT THAT

I liked how other people liked my breasts, and because other people liked them I kinda went with it because it made me feel attractive to have big honkers on my chest. When it boils down to it I didnt actually like wearing clothes that were revealing or form flattering, and I hated the attention I got from it even more, even when people were around. I assumed this was because of the "women are objectified and sexualized and get assaulted" stuff and I'm sure that was part of it but I'm sure some of it was also dysphoria, but I didnt know enough about gender and gender identity to figure that out at the time.

4. "You didn't show any signs!!"

- On the contrary! When I was a teenager I lost count of how many times I told my girlfriend I wished I was a boy. I remember chopping off all my hair and how stoked I was about it, and how my girlfriend ran her fingers through my hair like "you look like a boy!" I remember finding any excuse I could to dress like a boy even though people make jokes about how I looked like a 12 year old or a 10 year old boy. The signs were all there. Just no one noticed them. Not even me.

But I still had imposter syndrome and its taken a lot for me to get over that. Honestly a lot of it also stemmed from the fact that My sister questioned her identity when she was a teenager. She identified as trans, and wanted a binder, asked us to call her he/him and changed her name. She was like this for about 2 or 3 years. She tried to start Testosterone but never did bc the therapist she was seeing wouldnt help her with it.

What happened? Idk but one day she started using she/her pronouns again, and asked us to use them again for her, now she identifies as a cis lesbian instead of a trans man.

And I was worried I would go through the same thing.

I also had to over come some internalized transphobia and conditioning, which was the result of uneducated cis people and terf rhetoric. It's been a long road. I've grown a lot

I'm a lot more comfortable and confident in my own skin and I know beyond a doubt I'm trans just because of how my heart sinks when I'm deadnamed or misgendered. Theres no doubt in my mind.

But my initial coming out was hard. If it wasnt for my friends I might have gone back into the closet because the 1 person i thought would have been supportive no matter what, wasnt as supportive as I thought theyd be. Without my support circle I probably would have killed myself back in 2018.

Now I feel a lot better about myself than I did then (even if it's not always obvious) I still struggle with mental illness but since transitioning theres one less thing contributing to my depression and insecurity.

[ajora]

This is a bit of a mix. I’m desperate for gnc/butch lesbian rep, too.

Film:

What Keeps You Alive - Canadian thriller about skeletons in the closet. Can be a bit harrowing given the subject matter, so be warned. 

The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love - Actually my first lesbian film and might be responsible for me identifying as butch, haha. It’s a sweet little first romance/comedy. One of the protags is more often identified as a tomboy, so the butch label is debatable. Said protag’s actor went on to be one of the stars in the original The L Word.

Pariah - I haven’t seen it, but I’ve heard good things about it. About a young black stud figuring herself out.

Yes or No - Also haven’t seen it. Thai film (series?) about butch and femme college roommates getting used to each other and falling in love.

TV Series/Serials:

Tipping The Velvet - A classic! Sheltered girl falls for male impersonator, it doesn’t work out, sheltered girl becomes not so sheltered. Be warned that it does run the gamut of history-related social issues.

One Day at a Time (2017) - Not so much butch as… lesbian-identifying teen daughter character figuring herself out and constantly questioning Latine and white gender norms. She has a non-binary love interest.

Bunch of others here on Reddit.

Books: You have a lot more options here. The Butch Archives has a nice library, as does The Lesbian Review.

Questionable? Self-identified female character crossdressing as male for social reasons:

Elisa & Marcela - Spanish biopic about a historical f/f couple who passed as a heterosexual couple in order to marry in 1900s Spain.

Painter of the Wind - South Korean series about a young painter disguising herself as a boy in order to find her father’s murderer and enter an institution limited to men. Though her teacher falls for her and they have sort of a thing going on, the really steamy stuff is her relationship with a gisaeng, Jeong-Hyang, with whom she has so much chemistry that they were the unofficial couple of the show.

Revolutionary Girl Utena - Girl rescued in her youth by a “prince”. Instead of falling for the prince and opting to become an ideal princess for him, she decides to become a prince herself. An extremely experimental anime that honestly not even the writers fully understand. Utena’s butch status is debatable, but boy does she go whole hog with the prince thing. Warning for dark themes that pop up as the show goes on.

Pretty much almost anything by Ikeda Riyoko, a Japanese graphic novelist popular in the 1970s whose protags are primarily willowy blonde women passing themselves off as men. Though most of them have cis male romantic interests, some of the crossdressers’ friendships are really, really sapphic. I’m just never over Lady Oscar thinking that if only she was a man, she would marry her friend Rosalie because Rosalie would be the perfect wife. GAY. A lot of Ikeda’s work reflect gender theories of the time, but also? her novel Claudine is one of the earliest manga works to portray a trans man in a sympathetic manner.

Final Fantasy V - Debatable in that many young fans unfamiliar with the Japanese text will insist that Faris is a trans man, but she says herself that she’s a woman in the Japanese text, it’s translated as questionable in English, and basically all the Japanese works like to point out that yes, she’s a woman who crossdresses as a man in order to be take seriously in a very male-dominated field (and this crossdressing in order to access male privilege is something that comes up in other East Asian works, too). Notable in that she shows no romantic interest whatsoever in men and is not punished by the text for preferring to crossdress even after she’s outed.

Takarazuka Revue - As a female-only theater troupe that started in Japan as a tourism magnet, male roles are played by otokoyaku, women who train hard to portray men. So if you like crossdressing, the Takarazuka Revue has your back.

What’s some media with gnc women, esp wlw, especially lesbians???? I’m in an absolute desperate need

Oh anon, pickings are kind of slim, but here’s something:

Orange is the new black (gnc women, lesbians, bi women, young women, middle-aged women, elderly women)

Gentleman Jack (butch/femme)

Bound (butch/femme)

Mad Max: Fury Road (gnc woman as the hero)

Alien (tough woman main character)

I’d advice you to look for movies made pre-2000s when actresses weren’t put in a pound of makeup, and search for female-led stories. When browsing lesbian films, look for female directors. Like I do like The Handmaiden, but any man who directs a lesbian film that’s rated R is immediately suspect to me.

Feel free to put your favorite gnc ladies and lesbians and those absolute treasures, butches, on this post!

- Lavender