#I hope you will enjoy the vibes I've been trying to pick out!

[cyndraws]

Transmigrator Kaito au playlist!:

Nowhere near done at all, it's still a wip haha. I will be shuffling things A LOT in the future, including making my own playlist cover art cause <3 why not

(Yes, art is being planned!)

I've been working on it slowly, and been focusing more on capturing the vibes. Feel free to check it out! It's hard to show vibes through my other posts other than unhinged chaos (<- my default mood when writing original posts)

Yes, it's QPR ShinKai! I wrote Kaishin before because I forgot there's a difference between the two ship names haha. I don't usually think in terms of 'top' and 'bottom'

Note: This playlist is from Kaito's pov

[soelstress]

Silent In the Library

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female!reader

Summary: While on a mission with Bucky, both of you get creative to avoid detection.

Word count: 3.3k

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI , nsfw , explicit sex/smut, fingering , p in v sex , unprotected sex , sex in a library , some language

A/N 1 - This is my second submission for @mercurial-chuckles Smutty September Fest. Thank you for doing this challenge, it's been fun playing around with the prompts.

A/N 2 - Prompts - Asked a friend to pick up to five prompts for me... of course I was given five so two stories it is 🙈 7) finding a somewhat private area at a fancy party to fuck (coat closet, empty office, secluded corner on the big balcony, hedge maze if we wanna get dramatic, etc) 14) Library sex for those dark academia vibes

A/N 3 - Do not Steal, Copy or Plagiarize any part of my work - I think the photo was from the 'Fresh' Flaunt photoshoot but I saved it from Google

A/N 4 - Please let me know if I've missed a warning, knowing me it's more than likely. Hope you all enjoy ☺️

Your limited sight in the dark night only heightened your other senses. Branches of the hedge dug into the skin of your back, scraping the exposed flesh. Warm pants tickled your ear. The smell of fresh greenery swirled with cologne, but the hand around your throat prevented you from inhaling. Your heart pounded and breaths became shorter, you couldn’t take much more.

“Come with me”.

You froze when he suddenly crumpled to the ground without a noise. Not daring to even breathe, your eyes darted around. A shift in the shadows caught your attention, moonlight softly reflecting off black and gold Vibranium to reveal the presence of your saviour. You took a deep breath in relief, the sudden rush of air triggering a coughing fit. “What took you so long?” 

A scoff reached you long before the outline of your mission partner, barely visible in his dark attire. “Despite what Sam believes, I do not have ‘cyborg x-ray vision’. Took me awhile to dodge security AND find you. In a maze. That’s out of bounds. Couldn’t have made it any easier for me, could you?” He stopped near you, pausing as your coughing fit didn’t seem to be easing. “You ok?”

You raised your arms in an attempt to ease your spluttering. After a few moments, it slowed. “Unfortunately for you, yes”. You took a few slow breaths before turning to him. “Sorry for any extra paperwork, I’m sure you’d prefer that to having to deal with me”.

“I can handle paperwork. What I can’t handle is Sam complaining if something happens to you. I wanted to throw him off the plane because he grilled me for a bruise that you got. After our last mission. Tripping over thin air”. Though you couldn’t see his face, you could feel the weight of his trademark scowl. Hopefully he couldn’t see the blush on your cheeks from his words which unfortunately were true. “So can we please try to keep you in one piece to complete the mission and the journey home?”

Right. The mission. The one requiring you to break into the mansion of a former Hydra informant to retrieve a drive that contained information on old Hydra bases and activities. The one that Sam swore would be best to infiltrate on the night of a big party to avoid rousing suspicion. The one he insisted on pairing you and Bucky together. James Bucky Barnes - tonight’s savour, the reason you had previously tripped over thin air, and ultimately your unrequited crush. Part of you wanted to kill Sam who teased you mercilessly for your crush but the other part relished the chance to work closely with the sinfully sexy Super Soldier.

The pair of you had decided to attend the party separately, providing two opportunities to grab the drive, but also separate alibis if required. On arrival, you had started by trying to sneak upstairs to the library. But one lone security guard had thwarted your effort and then proceeded to follow you. In a desperate attempt you tried to escape him in the maze but he had cornered you. He had toyed with you, threatening to take you to the host when Bucky had stepped in. 

A soft grunt interrupted your musings. Bucky had picked up the security guard and removed his phone. Walking a few strides to where two hedges met to form a corner, Bucky carefully launched the guard to land on top of the eight foot hedges so he was out of sight from anyone walking by. You couldn’t help chuckling at the sight. Together you both started to follow the path of the maze in a companionable silence. A few turns had been made and in the distance you could see pinpricks of light from the mansion. Bucky’s warm hand grabbed your wrist. “Someone’s coming” he murmured. You knew he’d be thinking about how to fight his way out as quietly as possible. But with one guard down already, you couldn’t risk attracting further attention.  And only one of you had Super Soldier speed. An idea burst into your mind as you glanced around, seeing a small path in the hedge that led to a dead end after a few paces. 

 You turned and yanked him toward you. “What -“ his question was cut off when you pulled him into a fierce kiss. Bucky froze. You were certain he’d shorted circuited and that you would end up having to fight your way through. Pulling away, you made to turn and face the approaching threat but Bucky guided you backwards towards the small path. His left arm cushioned your back from the hedge, hand cupping the back of your head. His nose and lips drifted along your neck and collarbone, growling when your hands gripped the lapels of his jacket in an effort to pull him closer. Lost in a fog of desire, you felt your body trying to meld to his. His right hand gripped your waist, your leg starting to lift up to his waist in response when he froze again. “They’re gone”. Reality washed over you like a cold tidal wave, the heat of embarrassment soon fighting with the chill you’d felt a moment ago. Though you craved so badly to stay pressed to him, you knew that he didn’t feel the same as you. Besides which and most importantly, you had a job to do. Unclenching your fingers from his jacket, you tried to lower your leg discreetly and checked your appearance as a cover. Bucky unwound his arms from around you but didn’t step back. “What was that?”

Face burning, you sidestepped him with a shrug. “All your training and you don’t know how hard it is to run in heels, let alone fight”. As you walked, you could feel heat in your belly and slick pooling in your panties. Unbelievable. You’d acted like a horny teenager - sharing one kiss and then pressing against him as he held you. How the hell had you lost control like that? There were a few moments of your footsteps before you heard Bucky’s tread catch up. Tension was thick as you silently headed towards the mansion. Leaving the maze, you saw people making their way indoors. 

You avoided looking at Bucky. “I’ll mingle”.

“I’ll hit the bar”. 

Both of you separated at the bottom of the stairs, joining the crowds to drift inside. You began to work your way around the room, spending a few minutes in various conversations and contributing noises of agreement or amusement. It would be enough for the fellow guests to notice you in the moment but difficult to remember later while also giving you a good cover in case security was watching. After thirty minutes, you walked down the hallway that led to the ladies room on the next floor but also the main stairs that led to the library on the top floor. 

“Sam’s gonna kill me, your back looks like you got in a fight with an alley cat”. The rough timbre rumbled in your ear. 

Shrugging, you cautiously began to climb the stairs. “Some guys these days can’t manhandle a woman properly. It’s not the first time I’ve been roughed up”. Bucky fell silent as you moved towards the landing of the next floor. You hadn’t noticed the scratches on your back, Bucky must have effectively shielded your back when he pushed you into the hedge. You bit your lip to hold in a soft moan at the thought. From the way the way he’d handled you and the security guard in the maze, you knew that his version of roughing up would be very different.

“Hold up, doll. Security’s sweeping the stairs. Just lean over and wave like you’ve seen someone”. Doing as instructed, you leaned against the railing. Somehow your gaze landed on Bucky at the bar. A choked gasp escaped your mouth at the first clear sight of him. You knew he wore black from his camouflage trick in the maze. But this was something else. Dressed in a form fitting black suit with tousled hair and stubble dusting his cheeks, he had your heart and mind racing. “See something you like, toots?” Caught in a blue gaze, you blinked before waving. Bucky raised a crystal glass of amber liquid, the black jacket looking snug against his beefy arms and broad chest. 

Taking that as a signal to start moving again, you quietly hurried back along the corridor. “Almost didn’t recognise you without that scowl Barnes. You actually look decent”. 

A soft chuckle sounded through the comm, sounds of movement following. You figured Bucky had left the bar. “Well you clean up nicely too. Almost mistook you for a dame in that dress” he teased. As you crept up the final stairway, a mirror was placed opposite the steps and you took a moment to admire the dress you wore. A black velvet maxi dress that was strapless and had a slit up the left side hugged your body. Blushing slightly, you couldn’t help feeling pleased that he had noticed. Reaching the top of the stairs, you moved towards the correct door. 

You glanced behind you before carefully opening the door to the library, slipping inside before you closed it and looked around. Two walls were lined with books, every floor to ceiling shelf filled carefully and pristinely kept. The door you had just walked through was also framed with shelves of books. A giant rustic stone fireplace dominated the fourth wall to your left, a roaring fire illuminating an abstract painting mounted above it. Chesterfield seats were scattered through out the room. A pleasant smell of old books and leather soothed your nerves and you found yourself relaxing. Approaching the fireplace to examine the painting closely, you were suddenly yanked backwards into the left corner of the room near the door. As you wriggled, you managed to elbow your assailant before being restrained. “Calm down toots! It’s me” Bucky grunted in your ear before letting you go. 

“I thought men from the forties were gentlemen?” Grumbling, you turned and straightened your dress before looking at him to see him rubbing where you’d jabbed him. “Gotta say Barnes, grabbing a lady like that tarnishes your reputation as a charmer”. 

Bucky smirked, his face half hidden in darkness. “Depends on your definition of lady, doll. Besides you’re the one who said about being poorly handled in the maze”. You flushed, earlier thoughts of him handling you resurfacing. “Anyway, come look at this”. He pointed towards the left side of the fireplace. On closer inspection you noticed that the fireplace was not built flush into the wall but instead the stone sides jutted a few feet into the room. Before you could ask if the old man needed his eyes checked, he gently took your elbow and led to you the right side of the fireplace. A little corner nook was formed where the fireplace wall met the bookshelf of the adjoining wall. Near the corner a bookshelf slightly wider than Bucky was built in. “There’s an electronic book safe a few shelves up”.

Glancing around, you saw a rolling ladder on a track. You made to move when Bucky beat you to wheeling it as close as possible, but there was a small gap between the shelf and the ladder. Frowning, you glanced at Bucky who nodded and moved to hold the ladder on one side. As you climbed carefully up the rungs, you heard him move to hold both sides to stop the ladder from rolling. Carefully opening the safe cover, you saw the electronic key pad with the spaces for a five digit number flashing. Looking at the buttons, you could see five buttons had been pressed more frequently than others. As the possibilities for the code ran through your head and you eliminated any as a birthday or memorable date, you thought about how the owner of this mansion had become involved, anything you could remember about his background - of course. You scoffed softly and entered the code. 4-9-3-7-2. The lock clicking open echoed in the quiet room. Shaking your head, you reached into the safe and pulled out a small drive the size of a quarter before sealing the safe and replacing the book cover. You began to descend the ladder, carefully feeling for each step before moving. 

Reaching the last rung, you felt Bucky behind you. Inhaling deeply you slowly turned, using the rungs for support until you found yourself eye to eye with him. Without a word he took the drive from you and slipped it in his breast pocket. His flesh hand cupped your cheek. Blazing blue eyes searched your soul before his lips brushed over yours. Warmth rushed through every fibre of your body. As he pulled back slightly, you ached with want, with need. Lifting your right hand from the rung you caught his stubbled chin and pressed a kissed to the dimple before ghosting a kiss at each corner of his mouth. With a sharp inhale Bucky kissed you softly, almost reverently. He deliberately took his time, a sharp contrast to the fierce kiss in the maze. This was so much better than you had ever imagined, his lips firm and soft though roughened by the stubble peppering his face. You gasped when his tongue traced the seam of your lips, seeking access to your mouth. Once granted his tongue carefully tasted and teased, licking along your teeth and sending shivers down your spine. His tongue brushed yours and you could taste the whiskey he had been nursing earlier. Your thighs pressed together at his luscious licks, imagining that wicked tongue somewhere else. The hand holding his chin moved to drift through his hair while the other arm wrapped around his thick frame. Chests pressed together your leg slowly slid up and wrapped around his waist, grinding against him as you captured and sensually suckled his tongue. With a groan Bucky lifted you off the ladder and held you close. Your other leg wrapped around him as you continue to rub against him. 

Bucky’s lips moved to leave  a wet trail on your face, neck and chest. His right hand moved down your dress and snuck in along the slit. Cerulean eyes widened when he found how wet you were for him.

“The maze” you whisper, answering his unasked question.  

Nuzzling your neck, his fingers slid under the material and glided through your soaking folds. You bit back a moan when he brushed over your clit. One thick finger pushed  inside you, causing you to arch into him. “Fuck… so tight, baby”. As he moaned in your ear, another finger entered you. His thumb brushed your clit as his fingers curled upward. “Squeezing me so tight… God you feel so good”. The only sound that you could hear was your panting and the sound of his fingers fucking you. A burning pressure began to build.

“Barnes” you whimpered, humping his hand frantically. 

“That’s it sweet girl, cum for me”. Bucky’s smile widened as you clamped down on his fingers, his mouth swooping down over yours to catch any noise. 

Using his Vibranium arm to lift you higher, Bucky’s flesh hand fumbled to undo the waistband of his trousers. The sound of a zipper opening reached your ears. Searching blindly your fingers grasped his hot velvet flesh and gently squeezed the tip.

“Been hard since I first saw you in this dress earlier today”. Your eyes widened at the understanding Bucky had wanted you before leaving for the mission. “I wanted to break the fingers of that asshole who dared to touch you”. 

Longing flooded you at the dark threat. “Want you so much. Bucky… Please” you whimpered.

As he rubbed the head of his cock through your folds and over your clit his gaze burned into you, marking you. Lowering you slowly onto his cock, both of you groaned as the thick flesh stretched you deliciously. Once his groin met yours, you let out a small whine at being filled so deeply. 

Before he could move the door to the room opened, chatter and light filling the quiet space. Bucky quietly pushed the ladder back toward its original position before pressing you against the fireplace wall, only the length of the fireplace wall and shadows caused by the fire hiding your presence from the newcomers. Bucky’s eyes never left yours but you could tell his attention was elsewhere. Annoyance swept through you at the second interruption of the night chased by desire. Right now, you didn’t care that your mission was to infiltrate the home of a Hydra agent to steal essential intelligence. Right now, all that mattered was that Bucky - the man who you’d wanted for so long -  was here with you, inside you. These people could notice you at any moment, could catch Bucky balls deep inside you… 

At the thought, your core clenched around him which caused Bucky to let out a muffled curse. His dark brow raised in silent query. You’d never felt so exposed, so reckless and you wanted him in it with you. Rocking your hips, you tried to start moving against him. Bucky’s hold on you tightened as he shifted. A whimper escaped you as he nudged your clit with his movements. His flesh hand covered your mouth, both of you straining to hear any hints that you had been detected. But the chatter carried on, ignorant to the raw exhibition only a few feet away. 

Bucky placed a single finger against your lips in warning. You gently licked his finger before nipping the tip and sucking it into your mouth. Jaw dropping, he inhaled slowly before he began to move. Tongue swirling around the digit, your sucking matched the pace of his slow and steady thrusts. As his body temperature began to rise you were caught in a delightful concoction of senses - Bucky’s scent of sandalwood mixed with the smell of the library, drowning in the depths of his loving and lustful gaze, tasting the slight tang of your arousal on his finger and the feel of his body caging you as you clung tightly to Bucky, trying to pull him even closer. Cautiously he positioned you against the shelf, leaving you immobilised and unable to do anything except continue to take his measured movements. He began to roll his hips and pulled back before repeating the motion. As a wave of heat began to build, you could swear you felt his cock harden further. “Cum” he breathed in your ear. The dam broke and the tidal wave of pleasure overwhelmed you. Feeling a cry rise in your throat you kissed Bucky desperately. With a gasp he twitched inside you, filling you as he rolled his hips to prolong the pleasure as long as possible.

Distantly, you heard the door open and close. Only the gentle crackling of the fire and soft panting filled the room now. Bucky lowered you till you stood on slightly wobbly legs and slowly pulled out of you. Removing a handkerchief from his pocket, he carefully wiped between your legs before doing the same to himself. Eyes locked with yours, he tugged your underwear and dress back into place before tucking himself back into his pants, placing the folded handkerchief into his pants pocket. Leaning forward he caught your mouth in a soft tender kiss. “That should’ve been our first kiss” he murmured. 

“So what happens now?” You hated to think that this had only happened because of the mission, that nothing had changed. When his fingers entwined with yours, you were surprised to see him smiling softly.

“Long term? I want to court you baby, for you to be my girl and me to be your guy. But now? We leave, head home and handover the drive”. A twinkle danced in his eye as his smile changed to a smirk. “And then I want to hear you all night. No interruptions. No being quiet.” His brow puckered in confusion when you giggled. “What?”

“Looks like we’ll both be giving Sam something to complain about”.

[wtfsteveharrington]

c l o s e t o y o u | carmen berzatto x reader

we've got so much history baby

description: set months after your breakup, you and carmen navigate what it means to be separated. you're trying to move on but waves always return to the ocean.

warnings: kinda angsty but also hurt/comfort. mutual pining even tho you're both trying to pretend it isn't there. miscommunication. kinda mentions of cheating if you squint but not really. no one has cheated but what to call this vibe irdk so! also mentions of using the bathroom if that bothers you!! it's quick!

smut warnings: oral/fingering reader receiving, spanking, dirty talk, hints of dom!carmy, unprotected sex but backshots for 'safety', sexting, semi public sex, lots of hickies/bruises talk bc carmy's a lil shit, multiple mentions of masturbation for both, reader has a drunk bar make out phase post breakup. reader is afab but no major descriptors used.

word count: almost 9.2k. the longest thing i've written so far!

a/n: dare i say this might be my favorite thing i've written possibly. aiming to make this a three part series but possibly could go longer.... i hope you enjoy <3

maybe you and i were meant to be / maybe i'm crazy

‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊

Carmen’s eyes are trained on you from the second your front door opens. His hands stalled halfway through taking off his jacket, only one shoe clattering across your entryway. 

“Where’ve you been tonight?” 

Which you have no choice but to shoot him a warning glance in response. It was late, you didn’t have the energy for a fight and that’s the complete opposite reason of why you texted him to come over. “I was on a date, Carmen.” 

He physically deflated at your answer. “Oh.”

You can’t meet his eye, can’t risk seeing his reaction. Would he be upset? Indifferent? It’s hard to decide which would be worse.

When you had broken up a few months ago the roles were clear - A case of ‘right person, wrong time’. He was busy, so endlessly busy. Working late into the night and heading in randomly during the morning or afternoon if he was needed. Which he could easily decide he was.

For as long as you could remember Carmen always took Tuesdays off to spend with you and get life in order. That way he had Monday to help the restaurant recover from the weekend and could trust them to handle what was, usually, an easier day. It was a tradition you took seriously and the two of you regularly made plans together every single Tuesday. Date nights, day trips, a mixture of adventures. It didn't matter what you were doing together so long as you had Tuesday to look forward to and help get you through the week.

Yet things started picking up. More celebrity dining requests, more magazine and tv interviews, more, more, more.

And it wasn’t that you misunderstood how important the restaurant was. Far from it. There were many nights where Carmen would come home a ball of anxiety because it took an hour longer than he anticipated and he knew it wasn’t fair to you. There would be a mess of apologies as he barreled in the door, bracing himself for a fight or to see your disappointed face. All of which you happily soothed by repeating constant mantras - The restaurant was his baby; you weren’t upset; take a deep breath; we’re okay. 

Then eventually you stopped saying you weren’t upset, stopped saying you two were okay. Eventually you stopped waiting up for him at all. At first Carmen would shower and climb into bed, confused if he should attempt to hold you or not. Your sleeping (Fine, sometimes you faked being asleep too) frame with your back turned to him. The blankets pulled tight around your body acting like a shield. 

Finally he just started sleeping on the couch. 

So yeah, the fall apart came quick. It was an avalanche neither of you could control nor did either of you want. There was still love between the two of you - But again it’s the right person, wrong time. 

You avoided each other for the following weeks. Carmen threw himself even more into work and you took a week of PTO to go visit one of your friends. He wondered if you were safe, you wondered why none of the people in the bar tasted the way he did. Your friend encouraged you with every sloppy make out conquest but it always ended there. You wanted to get Carmen out of your mind but weren’t ready for him to not be the last person who fully touched you. 

It didn’t work but does it ever?

Carmen watched your Insta far more than he should have. Risking way too many glances down at his phone during his free time to see if there were any updates about how you were doing. As if you’d post photos with long captions that mimicked a therapy session but he didn’t know where else to go. Sydney would report back what your story shows no matter how much Carm insisted he didn’t care. 

Because he didn’t, okay? He was fine. He knew it was for the best. Right? 

And then you posted a photo of yourself in a low cut top laughing in a bookstore. He zoomed in to see what titles you had in your arms as if they were clues and his eyes definitely didn’t linger on the swell of your cleavage. He didn’t think about how many nights he took for granted watching as your back arched up under him and you begged for more. He didn’t think about the way you’d crawl into bed at night and his mind would instantly rid itself of anything but you. He didn’t jack off to memories of you in the shower every morning because thinking about someone else, watching porn of other people, it didn’t feel wrong. No, that wasn’t the case at all. 

You, on the other hand, turned on Google alerts for anything relating to The Bear or Carmen “Carmy” Berzatto. Most of it was just good Yelp! ratings or fluff pieces from the local papers. He wasn’t one for posting on social media, in fact you weren’t sure he used it at all but you still posted like he was, but sometimes you’d find yourself scrolling through Sydney’s feed to see if she was giving you any crumbs. Sometimes, if you were really desperate, you’d find yourself in Richie’s feed even. It was pathetic but you can’t help it. 

One late night you came across an Instagram story post Sydney had up. Carmen leaning against a pinball machine at some gaming bar downtown. His hair was pushed back, eyes crinkled up with laughter. He looked at ease, peaceful. You wondered if anyone there felt the same… Was someone whispering to their friends and trying to build the encouragement up to go talk to him? Would he respond? 

Right, it wasn’t your place to care anymore. Yet you still cried yourself to sleep and yearned for when things felt so much easier. 

Yeah, the breakup wasn’t exactly going well. 

A few weeks ago you came across Carmen at the grocery store of all places. Both of you had gotten so used to doing the shopping Tuesday mornings and, logically, you were both comfortable going to the location just like you had been weekly for months. Your breath caught in your throat and God he looked better than you remembered. The first thing out of his mouth was, “Great sale on gouda this week.” And the only thing your brain could conjure up was, “Well that’s gouda.”

You both stayed silent for a moment before bursting out in laughter. 

Laughter turned to getting lunch around the corner. 

Lunch turned into you straddling Carmen’s waist in the car while parked in the very back corner of the parking lot and riding him until your eyes watered and you couldn’t focus long enough to keep a rhythm. He wrapped his arms, such strong arms, around your waist and fucked up into you for all that he was worth. Trying to prove himself in whatever capacity you allowed. 

If he couldn’t love you like he wanted, he could at least fuck you better than anyone else would.

Once you two broke the seal of seeing each other it was hard to stop. There was almost a forbidden aspect to your relationship now that caused a small thrill to run down your spine every time you saw him late at night. You were pretty sure no one knew you started… Seeing each other again and you were both content keeping it a secret. 

So that’s how you ended up here. Standing across from him at 11 o’clock at night on a random Wednesday. You try not to wonder if he left ‘early’ the second you reached out, instead convincing yourself that it just so happened to work out he was ready to go within minutes of you sending your ‘My place tonight?’ text during this horrific blind date your co-worker set up. 

Jonathan, 6’1, finance major turned CPA for his family’s company. He was… Fine. Just fine. You left on good terms in case you wanted to call on him for back up one lonely night. The problem was no one else was Carmen no matter how hard you tried to look for him in the people that passed by.

And there he stood across from you with hair falling into his face and his eyes looking up at you like you’re crafted from Heaven. A skirt, thin tinted tights, a shirt that exposed just enough skin but not too much. The soft shimmer across your eyelids and glossy lips from the lip balm you’ve been continuously applying since you knew he was on the way. The last time he saw you like this was when you were fighting because Carmen accidentally showed up 15 minutes past when you were supposed to leave for a birthday party at your friend’s house and that night ended with you locking him out of the bedroom while he had to pretend he couldn’t hear you crying in the next room. He really didn’t mean to be late. Sometimes the nights just got taken away from him. 

Carmen hated that you were dressed up for someone else but he pretends you just threw this on for him.

Your arms cross your chest, totally not attempting to push up your breasts, and you let out a sigh while you stare at Carmen. “This has to be the last time.” His face is stoic, a perfect poker face. The last time? Break up or not he couldn’t imagine there being a last time he saw you. Half the time he forgets, still referring to you as his partner while brushing it off and refusing to correct himself. Then there’s times where he comes home to his empty apartment and realizes you weren’t there to light the long forgotten candles on the coffee table or open up the windows to air the place out. 

He closes the space between the two of you and stares at your face. Searching for answers he’s too scared to ask for. Your resolve is breaking, cracking under the weight of having him so close. Beautiful eyes staring at you, the way he smells like the cologne you bought for your last anniversary and clean laundry. If you weren’t so drunk on the sight of him you would have put it together that Carmen kept clean clothes at the Bear to make sure he could change before he came to see you. 

You’re both silent for a moment before there’s two hands wrapping around either side of your neck and Carmen’s dragging you two together for a kiss. God, he couldn’t stand the idea of someone else kissing you. Would they even do it right? Do they know the way you moan when he licks into your mouth or the way you always grab ahold of his wrists when he cups your face? Do they know the way you forget to breathe sometimes when you’re lost in it? He’d have to pull back in order to give you a second to gasp in a rush of air. Does whoever you were with tonight know any of that? 

You pull away from Carmen with a broken out moan, silva connecting your mouths and the faint taste of cigarettes on your tongue from him. Clamping your hands on his shoulders you just faintly push the two of you apart, trying desperately to collect your thoughts. Carmen crying during the break up, sobbing in your bed, living on autopilot for weeks, the way he kisses you like he’s scared it’s the last time anymore because it very well just might be. Everything coming back to you in flashes as he stands before you once again. 

“I called you here for a reason, Carm.” His eyebrow is cocked, eyes flickering down to the bulge in his jeans that started growing the second he kissed you. “Uh - Yeah? Isn’t that what… I thought that’s what we were doing?” Carmen’s leaning in again, letting his lips connect to your neck. Warm kisses being pressed in a path up to just below your ear. “No uh, oh, remember how you let me keep the cast iron?” He hums in response, teeth nipping at your earlobe while broad hands start grabbing at your waist. “Yeah, uh huh, the cast iron skillet.” Fuck the stupid cast iron. He’s much more concerned with hooking fingers in the waistband of your skirt, attempting to pull it down while you’re fighting to stay focused. 

“Well my friends came over the other night and oh Jesus.” He’s licking a strip up your neck now, only half focused on your story. “Carm, please, they were helping me clean up and someone left it soaking in hot water overnight.” That’s finally got him freezing in place, his aroused little sounds quickly turning into a groan of annoyance. “Fuck. That ruined-… I mean, the seasoning has to be ruined. Assuming it rusted?” You nod helpless, fingers dragging along his chest while Carmen stares over your shoulder.

His eye twitches involuntarily. 

There’s a deep sigh coming from his body as he steps around you, finally kicking off his long forgotten second shoe before walking further into the apartment to head towards the kitchen. 

And listen, it wasn’t that you were necessarily concerned so much with the pan. Sure the two of you had purchased it together during the first few weeks of talking. Carmen cooked breakfast with it every Tuesday morning and showed you how to care for this damn pan. It was the closest you two came to owning a pet just… In the form of a nine inch cast iron skillet. You were more curious if he would care. A simple way of testing the waters to see if he just cared about getting laid or still cared about you. The answer should have been obvious but you still had to know.

You follow behind him and wince at the stream of expletives that easily fall from his tongue at the sight of the pan in the sink. It wasn’t horrible but wasn’t ideal. “Y’know, crazy thing is I’m pretty sure I can guess who did this. They kept trying to convince me cast iron wasn’t any different from a standard pan no matter how many times I tried convincing them that just wasn’t the case.” He’s grumbling to himself while crouching down to fish out supplies from under the sink, easily navigating your apartment from memory. The two of you had bounced between your places and talked about moving in together once his lease was up. Going as far as touring a few locations but the conversation was long forgotten once the tensions started building. 

As much as Carmen claims he didn’t see it coming, he resigned his lease almost two weeks before the break up officially happened. 

You hop up onto the counter next to the sink and watch as Carmen gets to work restoring your pan. “Think it's gonna make it through? I can't believe this is how it might end for the poor thing. All because I wanted to make your chicken piccata.” A few of his recipes had stuck with you and sometimes you find yourself making them when you’re missing him extra at night. 

“Nah, it’ll be fine. Just some surface damage s’all.” You watch as the muscles in Carmen’s arm move with the scrubbing motion, your lips itching to kiss over every exposed tattoo. Snap out of it! This is just sex between two consenting adults trying to let off some steam. That’s all. You’re both just comfortable and it would take way too much effort for someone random like Jonathan to learn what you like. 

Carmen catches you staring at him, not that you were being subtle about it, and feels heat blooming in his chest. He grabs one of your kitchen towels and gives the skillet a good pat down before sitting it upside down to dry off. It’s not perfect, not yet at least, but he’s pretty sure he’ll explode if it takes any longer to finally get his hands on you. 

“You look pretty tonight.” He’s coming to stand between your knees, reaching up to you with the hem of your skirt as you hum out a small “Thank you.” It seems like every time you see him lately you forget just how blue his eyes are. So easy to get lost in them especially from this close. Your hands come up to gently trace the features of his face. Just the ghost of a touch but Carmen’s soaking up the affection. He tilts his head in order to press a kiss to your palm. 

His hands are dragging up your thighs, feeling the material of your tights under his touch. “Know how much you hate wearing these.” Your heartbeat is picking up so much it’s making you jittery, hands wrapping around the edge of the countertop to grip it as hard as you can. Keeping yourself steady. “Help me take ‘em off?” You arch your hips up off the counter as an invitation for Carmen. He’s wasting no time grabbing ahold of the waistband and dragging them down your body, groaning to himself as inch by inch your skin gets exposed to him. 

Neither of you miss the way you press your thighs together once they’re freed, hips twitching in anticipation. The tights are getting tossed across your apartment and left to be tomorrow’s problem. Carmen falls to his knees in front of you, letting them dig into the harsh tile of your kitchen while in pursuit of making his mark on you. He’s grabbing ahold of your ankles, bringing one of your legs over his shoulder while the other is brought up to his lips. 

Your eyes fall closed as Carmen starts trailing a string of delicate kisses along the length of your calf. His lips ghosting across your knee until he reaches the fleshy part of your thigh. While your hands finally escape the countertop and find their way laced into Carmen’s hair, he wraps his lips down against your thigh to start sucking a small bruise into your skin. “Carmy,” You hiss out, “What if I see Jonathan again? How am I gonna explain these?” But you’re not pulling his head away, instead doing quite the opposite by keeping his head in place. 

Carmen practically growls against your skin, a low and guttural sound coming from the man. His grip on you tights while he mumbles against you, “Fuck Jonathan.” You scrub your fingers against his scalp as Carmen finds another patch of skin on the opposite thigh to begin sucking a bruise into. His head ducking lower and lower under your skirt, the material finally getting you to pull your hands away from him.

Against all better judgment your thighs fall more open as he works his way down your thighs. There’s a series of small moans and whimpers coming out of you with no control as he reaches the top of your thigh, his nose dragging along the cloth covering your core. “D’you wear these for him? Or did you put them on knowing you’d end up texting me.” It’s impossible to answer when you feel his tongue drag along you, your hips rocking up towards his mouth. He’s bringing his hands up under your skirt now too and grabbing handfuls of where your thighs meet your hips to hold you down in place. 

“They’re purple, aren’t they?” A color Carmen had long ago decided he liked best on you. Something about the way the color compliments your skin… In all honesty, you were pretty sure he had purchased the exact pair you were wearing. You started the night with no intention of your date getting anywhere near your bed but instead being under the frame of the man who was exactly where you wanted him. 

He guides you to scoot you closer towards the edge of the counter, making sure you’re comfortable before mouthing over you once again. Hot, open mouth kisses being pressed almost exactly where you need them. One of his hands comes around your frame to grab a handful of the fleshy part of your ass while the other hooks a finger into your underwear, pulling the material to the side to expose you. 

There’s cool air being blown against your overheated body and your hands fly back to clutch at his back, his neck, the hair that’s exposed from under your skirt. Whatever inch of him you can find is being clung to like a lifeboat. He’s kissing the skin where your thigh meets your center, lips ghosting along the outer side of your folds. It only takes a few more pathetic whimpers before he finally takes pity on you and you feel his tongue go flat at the base of your hole, dragging up long and slow all the way to your clit. 

He groans into your core and the vibrations make you start to lose your mind. “Fuck. Fuck!” Carmen’s got your clit between his lips now, bobbing his head just slightly while he goes right to sucking on the sensitive bundle of nerves. If you didn’t want to be teased then he’d give you everything you wanted. One of his hands comes up under his chin now, a finger pressing into your tight entrance as his tongue works to lap at your clit, your folds, even dipping into you whenever his finger pulls all the way out.

A second finger slides into you while his attention focuses back to making out with your clit. You can’t keep track of the way he alternates between kissing and licking at you while his fingers push in as deep as he can get them. “So good, Baby.” Baby. It comes out of you by force of habit and it makes him twitch in his boxes. If you weren’t so drunk on him you probably would have started overthinking but he’s making sure your focus is on nothing else but his mouth for now. Carmen’s chin is slick with everything you’re giving him as he eats you out as if he’s a dying man and this is his last source of solace in the world.

“C’mon Honey.” He’s cooing against you, fingers crooked just how he knows you like it. There’s sloppy licks being delivered to your clit as his fingers pump in and out. His hand finally leaves it’s grip on your ass to apply a gentle pressure to the top of your mound, pressing down against the flesh to add yet another sensation. “Can feel how tight you’re getting. You wanna come for me so bad, don’t you? Be good for me.” 

Your hands fist around Carmen’s hair, hips rocking up against him and it doesn’t take long for an orgasm to wash over your body. You seize up at the feeling, thighs clamping around Carmen’s head as he licks you through it. He’s only giving you a moment to recover when you feel his fingers slide out of your sensitive body and he can’t help but go back to licking out the mess you’ve made.

“Gonna fuckin’ kill me, Carmen.”

He’s smirking against you but taking the hint. Your thighs shaking as he pulls back from under your skirt, taking a moment to appreciate the handiwork that was the bruises covering your thighs while you take a moment to recover. The way your pussy looks so pretty covered in the mixture of your arousal and his spit. Carmen can’t help himself but to swirl his thumb around your clit, your hips jolting up as you reach out to grab ahold of his wrist. “Need a minute please.” 

Carmen nods and stands up, wasting no time making work of unbuckling his belt. You collect your thoughts well enough to start unbuttoning his jeans for him, letting your fingers linger on his jean clad hardened length. “You, uh -” You won’t meet his eye, opting instead to start pulling his pants down his toned thighs. “You still okay not using a condom?” A roundabout way of saying ‘I’m clean, are you?’. Carmen nods as if it’s the most insane question in the world. Even if he’s not with you anymore, it’s still only you for him for as long as he can see coming. “No one but you.”

You can’t meet his eye, a wave of guilt washing over you concerning your earlier date with Jonanthan that quickly gets pushed away when Carmy grabs ahold of your jaw and brings you in for a haphazard kiss. Mindless, heavenly kissing. The two of you getting lost in the way your tongues know just how to navigate one another while your hand slides into his boxes and begins lazily 

“Gotta fuck you or I’m gonna cum on your hand like a fuckin’ teenager.” You giggle into his mouth but slide yourself off the counter nonetheless. Giving him one more tender kiss before turning around to bend yourself over the counter. It’s not the most gracious process but you’re tugging your shirt over your head on the way down, pitching it somewhere else to deal with later. 

He’s looking at every inch of you. Underwear still pulled to the side, the way the lace of your bra looks against your back. Memorizing every detail he possibly can just in case you wise up and stop letting him come over to defile you like this at night. 

Carmen is dragging the head of his cock through your folds, tapping it against your clit while you whine and rut back against him. The weight of his jeans and belt resting heavy against his ankles and keeping him grounded enough to not spill his load before he even makes it inside of you. You weren’t used to taking him all the time anymore, a thought Carmen can’t dwell on, so he goes inch by inch and gives you time to adjust to the girth of him. He was thicker than anyone you’d been with before and every random hookup together lately reminds you of the first time you felt him stretch you out. 

It burns in the best way possible and he’s so tender while you get adjusted. Waiting until you start fucking yourself against his length to take that as his sign you were finally ready for him. Carmen still starts slow, a teasing pace of pulling himself nearly all the way out before sinking right back in. “Pussy’s like heaven.” It makes you oddly proud to hear him call that out. To know you still have an affect on him after all this time.

“Think about fuckin’ you all the time.” He’s picking up speed now, “Think about how good you feel stretched around me. Such a good slut for me, aren’t you? Bending over and practically begging for it.” His words, once again, make your head spin. It was a common theme with Carmen. Your fingers lace in your own hair, desperate to grab ahold of something. “Always wanting you to fuck me, Carm. Dream about how good you make me feel.” Like you two were meant to fit together perfectly. 

There’s a lewd clapping noise coming from the way your ass smacks against his frame with each deep thrust. Eventually your arms give out, torso falling flat against the shockingly still cool countertop while Carmen fucks into you for all he’s worth. A firm slap is being delivered to your ass that causes you to yelp out, rolling your hips back against him at the same time as an act of encouragement. 

His mind is taken up with how good you feel. You’re perfectly stretched around him and leaking out around his base. So wet, so beautiful, so perfect. There’s a hand sliding up your back until it’s fisting around your hair, gently tugging at it and the new sensation has these pornstar worthy moans escaping you. Your loud and needy brain is completely empty as Carmen destroys you the way he knows how. 

“D’you think about me fucking you while you were sitting across from some asshole all night? Poor little pussy almost got fucked by someone who doesn’t know how to treat it.” His words are so casually spoken with just the right amount of bite that it’s causing your brain to melt. Jonathan didn’t stand a chance of getting within two feet of your panties, just another mindless date in your series of attempted ways to ‘get over Carmen’ which clearly wasn’t going well. He bottoms out in you, every inch of his length pressed as firmly as he can into your core. It’s so much, so full and he’s got you pinned in place. Unable to do anything but be used by him, just how you both know you love to be. “Or did you go just to make me jealous? Put on your slutty little panties and went to dinner knowing you’d text me to come fuck you tonight.” 

He’s grinding his hips into you on the impossible quest to get even deeper. It’s possessive, claiming, and you’d probably even be a little annoyed by his behavior if you were in a better state of mind. For now you’re bent over the counter with bruises blooming all over your thighs and enjoying an odd jealous streak coming from someone who, technically, has no right to be jealous. It’s making you feel dizzy and your heart throb and your pussy clenching around him. “You gonna keep talking or you gonna fuck me, Carm? ‘Cause if not I’ll call him to finish the job.” 

You liked riling him up. 

Another sharp smack is being dealt to your ass when Carmen starts to pick the pace back up. His hands are tight on your hips and his pace is brutal. There’s grunts coming from behind you that are making your head spin and if you were more coherent you’d be a bit more embarrassed about the drool sliding from the corner of your mouth as your boyfrie-….. Well, as Carmen takes care of you. He’s admiring the bloom of his handprint on your skin, brushing his hand along it before pressing firmly down to help soothe the buzzing sting of pain. 

He wasn’t fucking you as often, didn’t have you nearly as well trained anymore. These bi-weekly meetings are not doing nearly enough for your body. He used to be able to fuck you right through an orgasm and you’d keep going. So used to him working your oversensitive clit to his liking. Now you whine while grabbing his wrist and whimper out pleas for him to give you a few minutes. He hates not knowing your body as well as he used to even if he still knows you pretty damn well.

So when he feels you getting closer, he’s taking note. Keeping his pace exactly the same and letting his hand crash down against the tender flesh of your ass again. “You gonna give me another? C’mon, Honey. Can feel how bad you need it.” And you do. God you need every orgasm you’re lucky enough to get from him. 

Your hips buck and twitch and you let out a series of uncontrolled moans as your orgasm starts to wash over your body. If Carmen wasn’t between your legs then your thighs would have snapped shut while your toes curled and your heart started beating faster. You could practically hear it beating in your own ears. “S’good, so good. Thank you, thank you. Shit, thank you.” A mess but you couldn’t judge yourself. 

Carmen’s pulling out when he’s close after just a few more strokes, frantically jerking off his length to keep the sensation going. You’re rolling your hips back and riding out the waves of your own orgasm, glancing back over your shoulder to catch a glimpse of Carmen with his head tossed back and brows knitted together in concentration. “Come on me, Baby. Wanna feel every drip on my skin. Maybe I’ll let you take a picture of it dripping down all the pretty bruises you gave me.” 

That’s all it takes for him to come undone. Warm spurts of cum landing along your back, your thighs, some of it dripping down your folds. The feeling is pulling wanton moans from your mouth that send Carmen into orbit. God, he doesn’t want to come back down to Earth. Collecting his breath and trying to keep himself upright while the aftershocks of his orgasm wrack through his body. How was he supposed to stay away from you when it felt like this? Especially when you just kept calling him baby.

He stopped cumming inside of you since the breakup. It made sense, kinda. But you hated it. Felt like a waste even though you wouldn’t overstep and ask for him to go back to finishing inside of you. He would, by the way. Without a second thought he’d bury himself in until he couldn’t go any further and fuck his cum into you as deep as possible. 

You feel a finger swiping up some of his cum off your backside and soon enough it’s pressed to your lips. Without a second thought you take the digit into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it while licking him clean. He wants some of it inside of you one way or another. A subtle way of still putting his claim on you.

The two of you take a moment to recover after Carmen pops his finger out of your mouth. His hands are running a circuit up and down the side of your thighs and torso, still enjoying the view of your body relaxed against the counter in front of him. The tile was starting to become painful as your stomach bent over it but you couldn’t bring yourself to move just yet. You didn’t fully trust your legs to support your weight without the counter for support. 

Carmen’s rustling around behind you now. Reaching down to pull up just his boxes but kick his jeans the rest of the way off finally. He’s not ready for the stimulation of such a heavy material against his sensitive skin yet. There’s a clattering from the sink area as he retrieves another towel to get wet for you and a cup to fill with water. Your eyes feel heavy. Mind’s at ease having Carmen around again, not that you’ll admit it, and your body feeling languid after being fucked so well. 

There’s a glass of water being sat in front of you. “Drink.” So you prop yourself up on your elbows and nurse small sips of the water while the cool rag gets to work wiping down your backside from the mess he made. His fingers ghost along the tender flesh of your ass where he was spanking, “Feeling alright?” You hum into the cup, giving him a small waggle of your behind to reassure any concerns he had. 

He gets you cleaned up in silence, letting the both of you enjoy the simple moment. Carmen always prided himself on taking care of you. There’s warm hands, still damp from cleaning you up, rubbing up the sides of your torso before wrapping around the tops of your shoulders. His hips rub along your backside and you just feel so warm, so safe like this. “We gotta get you to bed.”

You just sigh and scrub your hands over your face. A beat of silence passes while you collect your thoughts. “Carm, I don’t think I can stand up.” Your legs are still slightly shaking and your mind has yet to catch up with your body. 

Laughter’s coming from behind you as he delivers a playful swat to your ass. “C’mon I’ll get you there.” This feels so simple. You find yourself questioning why the two of you even broke up to begin with when the good moments were this good. Easy, content, safe. Would you ever be able to find this again? Would he? 

He’s grabbing ahold of your waist while pulling you back into his chest. Your head falls back against his shoulder and Carmen allows his lips to once again find your exposed neck. A series of gentle kisses being placed as his arms snake tighter around your body. “Still feeling okay?” You let out a content hum and allow yourself to be held by him. “Feel better than I have all week. Thank you, Carm.” You feel him smile against your skin as he places another delicate kiss. “Always.”

The two of you stay intertwined until Carmen starts to encourage the shuffle towards your bedroom. He makes sure you get cleaned up and ready for bed. Brings you one of your sleep shirts while you brush your teeth and tries to not overthink when you offer him a toothbrush of his own because you just so happened to have an extra. Gives you privacy when you complain about needing to pee and you find it odd there’s a tug at your chest when he ducked out of the room. Part of you hated being that couple who left the door open or used the restroom while the other showered, yadda yadda. It was a sign of comfort and the door being pulled shut behind Carmen was a sign that comfort was long gone. 

Not that you cared. Totally didn’t care at all. 

He’s going to just tuck you in at first until you’re clutching at his frame and pulling him into bed next to you. Carmen never could say no when it came to you, especially when he feels his back sinking into your soft bed and your warm body curling up along his side. He should go. Get home before it’s too late and try to get some sleep. He’s already planning on getting to work early to avoid having too much free time to think about tonight in detail. 

But his clothes feel so far away and the long day is starting to finally hit him. You can practically hear him thinking over his options and your breathing starts skipping as you feel him begin to pull away. 

“Carmen.” Your grip on his chest tightens and it pulls directly at his heart. Since this whole… Situation started he never stayed the night when your meetings would run this late. Always picking his clothes up out of piles on the floor and mumbling something about needing to get home to get stuff together from work. You never asked him to stay anyway. Neither of you knew if that would make an already weird and complicated situation even worse. 

But tonight was different. 

There were hints of a storm in the distance you start telling yourself. If you focused you could hear thunder, somewhere, out there and you just wanted Carmen safe for his sake. That’s all. So you pathetically cling to him and hope you don’t kick yourself out of embarrassment in the morning. It takes just a moment of him looking down at you to understand what you can’t say and he’s giving you a little nod in response. His arms wrap around your shoulders, leaning in to press a kiss to the top of your head. Kissing every inch of you had to be one of his greatest pleasures in life.

“Remind me to season that skillet in the morning.” 

‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊

Carmen, shockingly, sleeps through the night. The warmth of your body next to him coupled with your excellent sleeping experience. A comfortable bed with good pillows, a white noise machine in the corner of your room (the ice maker in the fridge at Carmy’s would constantly go off so you got used to sleeping with background noise to cover it up), it was the best night of rest he’s had in months.

Your sheets smell like home. 

He’s slowly waking up now and his first thought is how much he misses the weight of your breast in his hand. Second thought is how much he needs to pee but damn your bed is comfortable. 

Carmen allows his body to wake up slowly. Stretching his arms out above his head and letting out a satisfied grunt at the feeling of his well rested muscles. Blinking his eyes awake just enough to take in the sight of all the trinkets and items that covered your space. There’s some things he notices that he knows for a fact he purchased you. Bottles of perfume, books you keep telling yourself you need to read, cups you constantly forget to bring back into the kitchen until you’re fully out of them.

Did you keep any of the pictures? Photo strips from Navy Pier and the holiday market at Wrigley Field. Everything from the disposable camera you brought along on road trips and vacations. The polaroids that once littered a cork board in your living room that the two of you added pictures to so often. If he looked around enough would he find them tucked away safely in a box or did you pitch them when you knew the two of you were through. 

Carmen still has one. You took most of them while you packed up your things from his place and refused to let him carry any of the boxes downstairs. So stubborn, so full of hurt pride. He just spent most of the day trying to stand out of your way but always available in case you finally admitted that you needed help. Maybe a small part of him hoped that as you packed up so many memories it would trigger a ‘What are we doing?’ reaction and you’d go running into his arms. 

You never did. 

But you did take one trip down to your car with an overstuffed Ikea bag over your shoulder and balancing a box on your hip. Carmen knew he didn’t have long, and it kind of felt like stealing, but he rushed over to the box you just started packing up and rifles through the photos as fast as he possibly could. It took a moment of digging before there it was. A polaroid photo someone took of the two of you on New Year’s Eve. You’re wearing some cheesy headband and he has those tacky sunglasses on that show off the incoming year on them. His arms are wrapped low around your waist as he stands behind you, one of your hands resting on top of his while the other is reaching up and back to cup his jaw. You’re both grinning and laughing in the photos and nothing bad has happened yet. 

He hears you shuffling back up the stairs so he’s quickly throwing the box back together after sliding the photo into his pocket and rushing back to stand in the kitchen. Acting like nothing was happening. You didn’t even look over at him so it wasn’t like he had to put up much of a show anway.

It’s still safely tucked into his wallet. 

The sound of the front door opening and hushed whispers are finally pulling him from his half asleep, reflective state. It looks like this day is getting started if he wants it to or not. He’s tilting his head to press it into the pillow underneath him, allowing one last deep inhale to remind himself exactly what your scent smells like before forcing his body to be pushed out of your bed.

Carmen turns the corner in just his boxer briefs and you’re not convinced you aren’t still dreaming because fuck he looks good. His hair’s a mess from the combination of you playing with it all night and him sleeping so well. One of his hands is scratching low on his hips while he takes in the sight of you in the kitchen. 

Maybe he shouldn’t be so comfortable walking around your apartment half dressed still but God is this relationship situation getting messier since the day since the two of you reconnected.

“Ordered some breakfast from Yolk. Figured you were hungry and I’m sure you have to run off this morning but I uh-…. I just wanted to make sure you were fed.” You nod to yourself. Giving him an out as you start popping open food boxes. There was just over an hour until you had to get to work too so there were multiple excuses possible for this morning to end as early as it needed to. 

In an odd, roundabout, time to head back to therapy kind of way it almost feels like you’re dating your ex. 

“Yeah.” He nods to himself and desperately wishes he had deodorant, cologne, fuck even Axe body spray. Something to make himself smell better or feel more presentable for you. “Richie actually tried installing fuckin’ bidets to the toilets last night. Kept on running his mouth about how prestigious they are and he, obviously, doesn’t know how to install bidets. So the bathrooms are a little-“ He waves his hands through the air.

“Shitty?” 

Second questionable pun you’ve made lately. Pull it together. 

There’s a breathy little laugh coming out, “Yeah, shitty.” Carmen’s peeking over your shoulder as you plate up breakfast, sneaking a piece of bacon from under your arm before pressing a kiss to the top of your ear. “Thank you for ordering this.” 

You nod and try to pretend you didn’t stop breathing having him so close to you under the soft morning light. 

He leaves $60 tucked under a vase on your dining table to cover breakfast. 

————

11:52 am

[DO NOT ANSWER]: Richie put his foot down and we’re stuck getting the bidets 

[DO NOT ANSWER]: If you’re wondering how my day is going 

12:17 pm

Shockingly my day is much less toilet related. I hope it’s going well. 

4:39 pm 

[DO NOT ANSWER]: I know so much about bathrooms now

————

You laugh a little too loud as the alert illuminates your phone. There’s a fond tugging at your heart as the ‘normal’ conversations fills your chat history instead of the short “My place tn” or “I still can’t find my jacket. You have to have it”. Maybe saving him as do not answer seemed too harsh but having his contact show up as a photo of you two cuddled up with the Chicago skyline in the background, an innocent and horrifically cheesy “Baby Boy 💙” contact name modeled after Richie saying you baby him too much one night. Every time it flashed across your screen and Richie saw he gave you guys an endless amount of shit. It became a constant bit that none of you got tired of at the time. 

You were trying to separate yourself from your past with him as much as possible at first but now those lines just keep getting more and more blurred. 

One of your coworkers grabs your attention away from your phone thus leaving Carmen’s message on read. He tries to pretend it doesn’t bother him as he gets to work prepping for tonight’s service. Who wants to talk about bathrooms with their… Fuck buddy? Ex? God that’s still so weird to say. 

‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊✮‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊

Your mind was haunted by thoughts of Carmen Berzatto all day. 

No matter how many busy tasks you assigned yourself he always seemed to creep back in. You’d look around for him when a joke landed well at work and the group you were with erupted into laughter. Could easily picture his head thrown back as he scrubs over his face in an attempt to muffle the sound. When you were standing alone your mind wandered off to the way he treated you last night. So claiming. Expertly working your body the way only he could after so much time of getting to know it. 

The bed feels so much 

You throw the blanket away from your frame and watch as it bundles up beside you. Is this crazy? It feels crazy. You shake out the nerves, fluffing up your shorts and primping yourself for the photo. It takes one, two, seven pictures to get just the right angle. An image of your thighs against the bedding and your oversized sleep shorts bunched up all the way down your legs. Taking a deep breath you steel your spine and pull up Carmen’s contact.

————

11:28 pm 

Headed to bed 

ONE IMAGE ATTACHED

11:29 pm 

[DO NOT ANSWER]: Fuck.

11:31 pm

Goodnight Carmen <3

2:12 am

[DO NOT ANSWER]: Can’t stop thinking about you 

ONE VIDEO ATTACHED

————

The sun is warm against your skin as it slowly wakes you up. There’s an air purifier rattling in the corner that acts half as white noise while you sleep, half to soak up the smells of Chicago. Sometimes when Carmen’s especially exhausted you have to bring out the big boy and ask your Google home to play sleep sounds to mask him snoring all night. You typically didn’t mind the sound, knowing it’s a sign of just how badly he needed a good night’s rest. 

You’re fishing your phone out of the comforter in a haste to click off the horrific sound of the alarm and your eyes are barely open when you see the alert. A preview image popping up and you can just barely a blurry image of - “Holy fuck!” 

Your free hand flies up to clamp over your mouth as a mix of gasps and ‘no fucking way’ come out of you with zero control. With shaking hands you open up the video, half tempted to pinch yourself with a video of Carmen fills your screen. His hand rubbing over the bulge in his boxers and there’s a mess of shaky breathing coming from behind the phone. You can’t get the volume turned all the way up fast enough and you’re terrified to miss a single sound. 

And there he is. 

Fishing his cock out of his boxers and stroking himself for you. Illuminated by the lamp on his bedside table and his hand over lubricated to mimic how wet you get for him. He’s a mess of filthy moans, bucking hips, are you dreaming? 

The combination of the sun beating in and the way this video is making your body go hot is too much. You’re overheating, kicking the blankets away from you while your hand goes into your shorts on instinct. Toying with your clit even though you don’t have much time to spare as you watch Carmen get off for you.

————

8:04 am

HEART REACTED TO A VIDEO

Mine tonight?

Fuck you sound so good

Wish I would have been there to clean you up

Say my name more next time please

How am I supposed to go to work now 

————

No response. You aren’t surprised, he’s typically busy in the morning. 

So you go along your day and let yourself enjoy the thought of Carmen coming back over tonight to take care of you. You had thought letting him back in was a risky move but things seemed fine so far. Settling into the new version of what normal was going to look like. Maybe things would end up being some version of alright after all. 

A chirp from your phone catches your attention and you’re instantly uninvested in whatever task was at hand. It might be a little pathetic how excited you were but that is besides the point. 

————

10:32 am 

[CARMEN]: Busy tonight

————

Busy tonight? Go fuck yourself Carmen! 

You waited all morning and THAT’S the response you get? Were the multiple texts too much? Did you come off too clingy? Sure he just stayed the night, was two times in one week where he drew the line? 

So you leave him on read and take away the heart from his video. Change his name back to DO NOT ANSWER and instantly feel the urge to get off tonight leaving your body. Replaced by a subtle anger that only he can bring out of you. 

The workday seems to go by so much quicker as you have this internal argument with yourself and mentally pick a battle with Carmen. Maybe you were silly to think things would… What? Go back to the way they were? No, of course not. 

Ugh!

Carmen who, by the way, truly was slammed. Got stuck hosting an event for an old family friend that he barely knew but was convinced it’d be good for business. He’s overwhelmed by work and anxious with his relationship with you. The breakup was horrific. One of the worst things he’s had to experience so far which certainly says a lot. At the very least - It made sense. This though? Sleeping together, fucking when you have shitty dates and he’s your second choice for the night, taking pictures of dumb things he sees during the day because it made him think of you but never actually sending them, it made zero sense.

If only there was something the two of you could do to figure this whole mess out. 

But alas.

You bring home a salad that’s far healthier than anything you’ve eaten all week accompanied by some fresh pressed green juice nonsense you lie to yourself and mentally say is delicious. The boy detox starts now. 

The shower you take that night must last an hour. Every inch of your body gets scrubbed, your face and hair both get a mixture of treatments and masks. You primp and polish yourself up and convince yourself that this is all for you and not so you look better than ever and Carmen will have to regret his stupid and shitty ‘Busy tonight’ text because you were also just like so, so busy and -

Fuck Carmen Berzatto. 

You decide you could go the rest of your life without hearing from him and be just fine. It was his loss. You’re funny, beautiful, and excellent in the bedroom. There’s thousands of people out there dreaming about finding someone like you!

This internal argument keeps going. And you know what’s annoying? The second you fling yourself into bed you realize he left his scent all over your sheets still. It hasn’t gone away - Cologne mixed with Carmen. And you 100% aren’t hunting out the scent nor are you hunting out a reason to stay annoyed with him. Not at all. So you get back out of bed and grab the fabric freshener to spray your sheets back down with, giving it a minute to dry before falling face first into the mattress with an annoyed huff. 

So yeah, fuck him. You hope you never hear from him again and toss your phone on the other side of the bed. Forcing your eyes shut and making your mind go blank because otherwise you’ll stew all night thus continuing this Carmen induced spiral. 

————

1:47 am

[DO NOT ANSWER]: Hey

————

Fuck.

[poppadom0912]

Request

Matt Casey and Wife Reader

There’s a big crash and 51 gets called out to it and they find Matt’s wife’s car in the crash all smashed up and Matt’s pregnant wife unconscious and hurt inside with their toddler son Jack who is crying. So Matt and the 51 guys do their best to save the family of their own Captain.

Warnings: Car crash, canon-typical injuries, death.

A/N: Once again, one month later. Life is not vibing right now but it's okay. I hope anyone who celebrated Eid had a wonderful time! very belated Eid Mubarak.

I hope this suffices and meets your expectations. I know this was sent ages ago and I apologise for the very long wait, I've just had zero inspiration and drive to write. This month has been very stressful with exams but please do enjoy!!

Matt was angsty and restless ever since his 24-hour shift started. There was no reason as to why he was but no matter what he did, he couldn't get rid of the feeling. He tried sleeping it off, eating lunch and even calling you when they weren't busy, but he still felt unnerved.

Just as he was about to text you, wanting to quickly check in again, something he'd been doing much more regularly now that you were pregnant along with looking after your toddler, the bells rang.

Internally groaning, Matt tried ignoring whatever his body was trying to scream at him and rushed towards the trucks, everyone quickly getting their uniform on before jumping into their 'allocated' seats.

It didn't take too long to arrive at the scene, the mess being much larger than what they anticipated. But maybe this was good, the more work he had to do, the less time he had to himself and to contemplate on whatever was bothering him today. The scene was one large mess, cars mangled together for what seemed like miles.

Maybe this was the exact distraction he needed.

Boden began shouting orders, Kelly and him following as they too started to delegate roles between their own respective crews. With equipment in hand, everyone scattered to hopefully start minimising this massive mess. From the looks of it, several casualties were to be expected with many more injured.

Squeezing between cars, Matt looked through broken windows looking for anyone who was stuck or left behind, also keeping an ear out for any shouts of help. Only, he didn't hear anyone shouting for help, but he heard crying.

It wasn't piercing like a newborn; he knew that sound well, but it sounded like a child and that made his heart skip a beat. Ever since Jack was born, calls involving kids become infinitely worse to handle.

Running towards the crying, Matt held his breath in an attempt to hear better, but his feet suddenly came to a stop before his brain could even register what was happening.

That was your car that along with many others, was laying on its side.

Matt vividly remembered you telling him your plans for the day this morning while he got ready for work and you fed Jack. You were going to run to the office to pick up some bits before taking Jack out to the trampoline park with some of his friends and other mums.

Apparently, you never made it to the park.

The crying continued and everything came crashing down on him. It wasn't just any crying, he recognised it easily now that he was closer.

Rushing forward, Matt ignored the broken glass and dropped to his knees as he looked for his family.

He saw you first. Your eyes shut, blood trailing down your forehead, head slumped to the side and seatbelt digging into your body that sat unmoving.

He then looked in the back where the crying hadn't stopped, Jack's eyes screwed shut as he wailed, the occasional 'mama' audible between cries.

"Jack. Daddy's here Jack." Matt forced out, his throat constricting at the sight of his hurt family. First things first, he had to get Jack settled and out the car before he could get you out. "Jack, it's me."

His crying calmed down, eyes peeling open as his crying slowly eased when he found his father.

"Are you okay Jack? You hurt anywhere baby?" Matt asked, easily taking apart the door and getting in besides the car seat.

"Daddy." Finally having one of his parents with and responding to him, Jack started to cry again, making grabby hands towards Matt as his words went through one ear and out the other.

"It's okay. I've got you now." Matt cooed, unbuckling from his car seat and before he could do anything, Jack launched himself into his dad's open arms.

A small oof was forced out of Matt from the sudden force of Jack catapulting into him. But he tightly wrapped his arms around his toddler nonetheless, his chest somewhat lighter with his boy safe in his embrace.

"Matt, is that- oh shit." Kelly swore as he rounded the car, eyes going wide as he saw father and son.

"I'm taking him to Sylvie." Matt started, holding out Jack for Kelly to take so he could jump out of the car that was still on its side and creaking with every movement he made. Without another word, Kelly took his godson and waited for Matt to get out before handing him back over.

"I'm waiting on Cruz and Violet." Kelly said, his eyes remaining on the father and son duo, both of their arms wrapped tightly around the other in fear of being separated again. "We've got Y/N, I promise."

Matt didn't even bat an eye when his best friend made a promise, one of which they were never allowed to make as first responders.

With another glance at your unconscious body, Matt held his breath as he stepped away, his heart constricting when Jack realised what was happening, trying his best to not crumble at his toddler's cries for his mama who wasn't responding to him.

*****

Somehow, Jack came out of the crash relatively unharmed besides the few cuts and bruises. He was for sure to be sore for the rest of the week. You however, your physical state was harder taking into account your pregnancy and they could only do so much in an ambulance.

It took them some time, but they had gotten you out safely, laying down still unmoving on a backboard. There were two of you but only one of him and with the way Jack was gripping his uniform jacket, there was no way he could leave, especially when he'd whimper at any movement he made, in hear his father would leave him alone.

Boden had dismissed him from the scene, giving him the permission to ride in the same ambulance as you, Jack not once letting go of him.

The hospital was in its usual disarray but Matt's concern was so high for you and your unborn child that he didn't even bat an eye at all the doctors and nurses running around ragged.

Natalie had seen you immediately, wasting no time in checking your physical state before scanning your stomach.

Matt could've cried when Natalie confirmed there was absolutely no harm caused besides whatever had been inflicted upon you.

After a few more checks and tests, Natalie turned to him with an understanding smile.

"She most likely has a concussion, some bruises that will definitely be sore for few weeks but nothing internal or severe."

Matt sighed in relief, his entire body deflating as he slumped back in the chair, Jack moving with him from his now permanent position in Matt's lap.

"You can go sit with her."

And so he did without any further prodding.

Walking back into the room, Matt looked your unconscious figure over, confirming with his own eyes that everything was indeed fine and you were in fact healthy.

Manoeuvring the sleeping toddler in his lap, Matt sat down and placed your hand in his. His fingers gently caressing the scars and scratches on your hands, knuckles raw and red from the sudden impact.

Closing his eyes, Matt lightly pressed a kiss into Jack's hair, his eyes stuck on you.

His little family were all safe and with him here where he wouldn't let them out of his sight. If his throat got tight and his eyes watery, glistening in the bright hospital lights, no one saw.

No one would blame a man who almost lost all his family before he could even meet its final member.

Matt sniffled, shaking away such unnecessary deprecating thoughts. You were all here now, unharmed for the most of it, and you were back with him. That was all that mattered.

[cozycottagetarot]

What Do They Daydream About You?

How To Pick A Pile:

Everyone has their own technique for choosing a 'pile'. My recommendation is to clear your mind and focus on each image for a few seconds. The image you find yourself coming back to even when you focus on the other images is the pile for you.

Quick notes on this reading:

I'm experimenting with a different style. -- I've been working on shorter, less structured, formal pacs (and some longer ones). I'm not sure how I feel about it but I'd like to hear your thoughts too!

I apologise for any errors. -- My immune system and I have literally been at war for weeks, so know if there are any errors, I probably missed it while wincing in pain. 😅

It's purely for entertainment purposes. -- Don't think I need to explain more. Take what resonates be it all of it, some of it or none at all.

PILE 1

14:44 as I pulled the last card, maybe 444 is of importance to you at the moment. Knight in shining armour vibes. Noble acts or intentions of just sweeping you off your feet. Introducing you to their friends and or family. Daydreams of big celebrations of being with you, internally and externally. For some, they daydream about celebrating the news of having a child with you. Finding peace after long struggles... starting anew with you. Domestic bliss, as in chilling at home with someone you love, not doing much of anything. Or simply enjoying the mundane tasks together. Going for walks. Having a cup of tea or coffee together. Peppering your skin with kisses... maybe physical touch is their love language. The ghost of their fingertips on your skin. Heart-to-heart conversations. Falling into a routine with you. The magic of embarking on new beginnings with you.

PILE 2

North Star Vibes. Holding out hope that they make it to you. Trying to make life better so they can show up for you. They daydream about how you make them stronger, about you being a good influence on them. It's like the thought of you soothes them when they're struggling. Dreaming that happiness is coming in the form of you. Lots of fiery energy. You're a symbol of hope. Rediscovering what they had lost with you. Feels like someone who has been through a lot. Playfulness. Daydreaming about you is embodying those feelings that seem long forgotten. I know I keep repeating the same thing over and over, but I'm not getting anything more than that (even when I go back to the literal meaning of the cards) so I pulled some love messages. There's the cards 'twin flame', 'finding myself' and 'still listening'. My interpretation is that daydreaming about you holds a mirror up to themselves which inspires them to look deeper within and figure out what they want and who they want to be. They could also find solace in music, they may have a song or playlist that makes them feel more connected to you.

PILE 3

If you were drawn to pile 2, consider checking out that pile as well too. 333. The number 3 could hold some sort of significance.

Dreaming of an equal. Someone to keep them balanced and bring a new perspective. They could feel as though (or know) some kind of scrutiny is possible, but they spend their time dreaming of overcoming it. There could be cultural differences or for some it's a matter of being in a same-sex relationship or anything that goes against what may be more commonly accepted. If it's of any significance, the red string of fate (two different decks mention it). Power couple vibes. Being able to maintain a sense of youthfulness in the relationship. Someone who won't try to take advantage of them, who'll push them to be better and vice versa, who'll look out for them. Someone to heal with and understand that they are still healing. They could dream of having a child with you or starting a family in whatever format that may look like to both of you. Daydreams of warmth & protection. Giving and receiving. You could possibly meet at a concert or connect over music.

PILE 4

I did a repull to make sure I was reading the cards right (it was stormy) and the same cards came out after reshuffling (minus one card). I feel like this person has been reborn. Who they were is not who they are now (or when you meet them). They could daydream of being divinely guided towards you. Someone spiritual or religious. At the very least finding a connection with something (a concept) greater than them. Daydreams of being guided towards happiness. They had a teardown and rebuild of who they are. They could be from a different location, you could meet when travelling across a large body of water. It feels like they're dreaming of coming in hot. They're paving the way for their happy ending. Take it as you will, but instead of a 'damsel in distress' (regardless of gender, it's just women on the cards depicting forging on) type of story, it's one of those ones where it's like "you know what, I'll save myself and I'll chase after my happy ending". Actually, I get a-spec vibes as well and that this person could be a platonic love or a strong platonic bond. It could even be you respectively. But the energy is one of being inspired and ever-lasting bonds. A new resolve, coming home to oneself, resting in the knowledge that the future is going to be good because you'll make it so.

[megalony]

Try To Keep Up

This is a new Tommy Kinard imagine, based on two requests I've merged together. I hope you will all like it, let me know what you think and I'm loving all the Tommy requests so far.

Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17

@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella

Tommy Kinard Masterlist

Summary: When (Y/n) and Tommy get into a relationship, they're nervous about telling her twin, Evan. He is very protective over his family. And a little conflict leads to an accident at a game of basketball.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you coming in?"

Biting down on her lower lip, (Y/n) looked up over her shoulder, locking her eyes on Tommy's frame.

She drank in his demanour and the way he was stood with his hands in his pockets and his shoulders slightly hunched up. He had his head tilted to one side, a quirky smile on his lips and a softness in his eyes that looked like they were about to melt. Something about the calm, serene vibe Tommy gave off contrasting with his bulky towering frame had shivers running up and down (Y/n)'s arms and down her spine.

"Is that okay?" He didn't want to push things or move too fast if that wasn't what (Y/n) wanted. Tommy didn't want her to think that she had to invite him in. If she wanted to call it a night he would respect that and head home without a second thought.

"Come on," (Y/n) pushed the door open and reached out for Tommy's hand, guiding him inside.

He'd never been into her and Evan's apartment before. He knew where they lived, he picked Evan up a few times when they were heading out somewhere with the team or out for a quiz night with Eddie. And more recently, Tommy had been round to pick (Y/n) up or drop her off, but he had never been inside.

He felt himself focusing on the way she glided her thumb across the back of his hand as if it was a nervous habit or a calming mechanism. Her boots clicked against the laminate floor until she kicked them off and it made Tommy smile when she dropped down a few inches in height once her bare feet were on the floor. She didn't have her brother's height.

Their hands stayed tangled together as (Y/n) guided Tommy down the hall and towards the kitchen table where she slung her bag down from her shoulder.

"Nice place," Tommy murmured quietly while he took a few seconds to look around.

Knowing both twins, he couldn't really imagine their home being very organised. Evan seemed the type to have organised chaos going on. Whereas (Y/n) seemed a fluffy mix between organised and disorganised all rolled into one.

But their apartment looked lovely. The colour scheme was black and white with the odd splash of grey and while (Y/n) wandered over to the fridge, Tommy looked up towards the stairs.

There were a few pictures lining the wall going up the stairs.

"Want a drink?"

"Sure,"

Tommy moved closer to the bannister so he could look at the pictures properly. There was one of Evan, looking to be in his teens, with (Y/n) clinging to his back. Her arms were around his neck and their faces were pressed together side by side with matching, widespread grins that gave away the fact that they were twins.

The next picture was a little blurry from the distance, but Tommy could make out a few familiar faces. It was the 118 team at some sort of party.

And when Tommy turned to look at the picture frames on the units leading into the living room, he smiled. There was a picture of Evan and Chris, both huddled together, laughing as they hugged a teddy that reminded Tommy of something people won at the fairground.

A shudder ran down his spine when he felt a glass bottle press against his arm, dragging his attention away from the pictures and down to the girl beside him. He smiled fondly when (Y/n) leaned her cheek against his arm and looked at the photos which had caught his attention.

"You like them?" She asked quietly while she handed a bottle over to Tommy and turned her head so she could press a delicate kiss to his exposed shoulder.

"I do; how old were you in that one?" He pointed up to the first picture on the wall and (Y/n) grinned.

"Eighteen, I think. We'd just started college."

When (Y/n) led the way towards the living room, Tommy turned and followed after her. He took a sip of his beer and looked around the few other picture frames scattered around the units. He didn't have to ask to know which twin had been the one to put all the pictures out. They were all pictures (Y/n) had chosen and printed to put around the apartment.

If it had been up to Evan, there would only be one or two pictures, but (Y/n) couldn't do that. They had grown up in a house with virtually no photos and had later learned the reason for that.

This was their home and it was a place of love and comfort. They needed pictures to show off their family and the bonds they had with the people around them.

Placing her drink down on the coffee table, (Y/n) leaned over and turned the lamp on before she headed over to the sofa and sank down. She curled her legs up beneath her while her eyes followed Tommy as he moved to sit down next to her.

He seemed to try and be respectful, keeping a small membrane of space between them. Until (Y/n) shuffled over so her knees bumped into his thigh and leaned her cheek against the back of the sofa.

"So, is Evan at work?"

Tommy brought one knee up to rest on the sofa while he shifted his body so he was facing (Y/n). He leaned his head on his left hand with his elbow on the back of the sofa while his other fingers strummed out a beat against the bottle in his hand that was starting to drip with condensation.

"He's out at Eddie's tonight." (Y/n) was sure she remembered him telling her he was staying out with Eddie tonight. That was the reason (Y/n) had no problem with Tommy coming into the apartment, because her brother wouldn't be hanging around the corner or up in his room.

(Y/n) nuzzled her face into the back of the sofa and dared to reach her hand out and drag her fingertips up and down Tommy's arm that was resting on his thigh. She could see his eyes following her movements and when she looked up, she realised he was smiling at her.

Her fingertips trailed across his arm and along his shoulder until she could curl her hand around the side of Tommy's neck. His brows arched but (Y/n) didn't bother to panic or focus on the change in his expression.

She leaned forward until she was close to falling on his chest, balancing on her knees as she kissed him.

Most of their kisses had been initiated by Tommy thus far. She let him take the lead because it felt safer to follow him and see where he would take things. But this was different. (Y/n) wanted to kiss him and she didn't want to overthink and wait and panic until the moment disappeared.

Tommy lifted his head up off his hand and pushed forward to meet her halfway, trying not to smile when (Y/n)'s chest slumped down against his as she leaned further forward on her knees.

He reached his hand out to the right and tapped the beer bottle until he heard it clink safely against the coffee table, leaving his hands now free to move.

His left hand curled over (Y/n)'s knee but he moved both hands to hold her hips when she leaned closer. He shuffled back until his back was pressed up into the sofa and his breath caught when he felt (Y/n)'s hands move to his shoulders.

He could feel the hesitation in her movements. She wanted to move but it was as if she wanted his permission or reassurance to go ahead.

Slipping his hands down, Tommy cupped the back of her thighs and pushed his chin into hers, parting for a split second to suck in a deep breath.

(Y/n) took the leap and hooked her left leg over Tommy's leg and sat down on his lap with her knees pressing into his hips. She felt his fingers dig into the back of her thighs and when his tongue pushed past her lips, she gasped for air, desperate not to part from him for longer than necessary.

Her fingers dug down into his shoulders as she leaned her head to the side to get a better taste of his lips. She could feel the beer transferring from his tongue onto hers and the start of his stubble tickled her chin and made her lean closer, desperate for the friction.

It felt like her mind was short-circuiting when Tommy pulled back enough so the tip of their noses were touching and they could both take deep breaths, sending dots flashing before (Y/n)'s eyes. But her chest sparked and her stomach flooded with bursts of adrenaline when Tommy tilted his head down and kissed her bottom lip.

It was just a small, fleeting touch, barely there before it was gone. Then he did it again, and again before his teeth nipped at her lower lip and gave a small tug as if testing the waters between them.

The feeling made (Y/n)'s body jolt and she pushed forward, gluing her chest into his as her hips rolled forward onto Tommy's.

The roll of her hips made Tommy groan and sink his teeth down sharper into her lip and his hands glided up from her thighs to cup her bum. He held her in place against him, opening his hooded, blown eyes to stare up at her through his lashes. Keeping her pinned against his chest so she didn't roll her hips like that again. He wouldn't have much control left if she did that again.

Trailing her hands down, (Y/n) skimmed her fingertips down Tommy's shoulders and down to the hem of his shirt. She gave a small tug, pulling his shirt free from his jeans and when Tommy let go of her lip but didn't move, she gave another pull and dragged his shirt up. It scrunched around the middle of his chest and (Y/n) felt the way he shivered and sucked in a shallow breath when her fingertips dragged along his abdomen and up his sternum.

Her administrations stopped when Tommy moved one hand up to cup her wrist. He tilted his head back against the sofa so he was staring up at her and with the burnt orange glow from the lamp, it case a beautiful halo around her.

"We don't have to."

He was sweet.

The tenderness in his otherwise gritty voice made (Y/n)'s heart add in a few extra beats and she smiled.

Tommy didn't want to push her or for (Y/n) to think she had to do anything if she didn't want to. But Tommy wasn't making her do anything; (Y/n) wanted this and his reassurance only made her heart weaker for him than it already was.

(Y/n) dragged her fingertips up Tommy's chest until his shirt was scrunched beneath his neck. He unhooked his hands from her body so (Y/n) could whip the shirt over his head and off his arms, tossing it somewhere behind her near the armchair.

When she realised his eyes were closed, she cupped his chin and dragged her thumb down his lower lip until Tommy opened his eyes and looked up at her through his lashes.

"I want this… I want you."

(Y/n) gasped when a guttural "Oh God," groaned past Tommy's lips and he wormed an arm around her back. His palm pressed flat between her shoulder blades and as swift as anything, he flipped them over.

Her hands went back to clinging to his bare shoulders and she gasped when he spun them round and laid (Y/n) down flat on her back on the sofa.

She lifted her hips and hooked her legs around Tommy's hips when he laid between her legs with his abdomen pushing down on hers. And she felt his hand move to cup the back of her neck, tilting her head back so her lips were level for Tommy to possess.

(Y/n) wasn't sure what to do with her hands so she kept them scrunched around Tommy's shoulders, feeling the way his muscles tensed and moved as he pressed down against her.

Stars floated in front of her eyes when Tommy pulled back and she took what air she could to stop her mind from short-circuiting.

When she felt Tommy's lips leave hers and attach to the side of her jaw, (Y/n) tilted her head back into his hand. Shivering when he dug his fingertips into her skin and moved his other hand to cup the back of her thigh while her heels dug into his hips.

She could feel all the air leaving her lungs and floating up to her head when Tommy's lips started making a trail down her jaw.

"Careful," Eddie leaned his head back and braced himself against the wall Evan had practically pushed him into.

When Evan moved to stand between his legs, the hazy, drunken smile on his face was enough to make Eddie see stars. He grinned as Even pressed their foreheads together and moved his hands to Eddie's shoulders, pushing his leather jacket down until it pooled on the floor just outside the bathroom door.

Reaching out, Eddie cupped Evan's neck and pushed up on his toes, stealing his lips in a kiss as he began to walk Evan back. He moved them away from the wall, grinning drunkenly into the kiss as Evan's hands found his hips and squeezed so tightly he was digging Eddie's belt into his skin.

Even in his drunk state, Evan had the apartment mapped out and he walked backwards with his eyes closed and his fingers trying to worm their way into Eddie's jeans.

Eddie stroked his thumb up and down the side of Evan's neck, taking a second to pull back for air before he swooped down and stole another kiss. And another.

His teeth grazed and punctured down into Evan's lower lip but he opened his eyes just to check they weren't about to crash into anything. He could feel the alcohol already sloshing around in his head making Eddie feel like he was swaying from side to side.

The last thing either of them needed was to crash into the unit or topple down into the coffee table.

But they didn't get further than the threshold of the living room before Eddie stopped in his tracks.

His fingers punctured into Evan's neck and he shifted one hand down to press his palm beneath Evan's shirt that was half unbuttoned already and hanging loosely off his shoulders. Eddie's chin pressed down on Evan's shoulder and he tried to take deep breaths to clear his foggy brain while his hand started to pat down on Evan's chest.

"What?"

"(Y/n)'s home."

Eddie clamped his teeth down on his lower lip as a sincere, apologetic look flooded his eyes as he looked across at the two people on the sofa they were unintentionally interrupting.

(Y/n)'s hands pressed down into Tommy's neck and she froze when she heard that familiar voice behind them. Her body went rigid as she wished this was just the alcohol playing tricks on them. She wished this was some sort of illusion or dream. But when she pressed her head back into the arm of the sofa and looked behind them, she shivered. Evan was home.

She looked back over at Tommy as his brows rose and his lips parted, but he couldn't find any words.

Evan didn't know about them.

They weren't going to tell him yet. Evan was understanding and loving and kind natured, but he was also protective. (Y/n) had explained to Tommy that her last relationship had been bad. It had been the only serious relationship she had been in and it had turned abusive.

She didn't want to tell Evan she was dating Tommy, not yet because she knew her twin would get worried. He would talk to Tommy and demand that he be careful and considerate and he would give him a lecture. And it wouldn't go down well because Tommy was Evan and Eddie's friend first.

Evan might feel like he was being pushed out or that he couldn't get close to Tommy if he was dating (Y/n).

"What are you doing?"

Those were the first words that fell past Evan's lips and they could all tell he was talking to Tommy, directly.

What are you doing with my sister?!

Was the silent message hidden in Evan's words as one hand stayed wedged up against Eddie's hip and the other hand curled into a fist at his side. Why was his new friend laid on his sofa, on top of his sister- his twin? What did he think he was doing?

"Hi Evan." Tommy pursed his lips, keeping a stoic, plain expression on his face as he took a glance around.

His left hand curled around the arm of the sofa just behind (Y/n)'s head and his right hand stayed on her hip. He had to keep himself balanced because if he dropped his weight down he would crush (Y/n) beneath him. But when he tried to push up on his knees, he felt (Y/n) gasp and deadlock her hands around his neck.

She pulled him back down until his chest bashed into hers and he realised with a wince that he had taken her shirt off earlier…and her bra.

(Y/n) snapped her eyes closed and slithered down until she was fully hidden beneath Tommy's broad frame. Her fingers began to tremble against his neck and she felt his hand give her hip a reassuring squeeze while he leaned down. His hand fumbled around on the floor until he found his shirt (Y/n) had stripped him of earlier.

When Tommy pulled up, (Y/n) let go of his neck and tried to smile as he dragged his shirt over her head. She was quick to slip her arms in and her stomach felt fuzzy when she realised how loose his shirt was on her and how it hung off her frame, almost three sizes too big.

Thank God she still had her underwear on. Thank God Tommy still had his boxers on.

Tommy pushed up and sank back on his heels, dragging his hand through his hair while (Y/n) pulled her legs from beneath his thighs. She swung herself round and sat up on the sofa, dragging the shirt down to her thighs before her bashful gaze landed on her brother.

"What are you doing?"

"Buck… I think it's obvious," Eddie moved his hand up to Evan's shoulder and leaned into his arm, but he winced when Evan slapped his hip.

"You said you'd be out tonight." (Y/n) couldn't hold her brother's gaze for long.

After a few seconds, she looked down at her bare thighs and leaned into Tommy's side when his hand reached down to clamp around her knee. She wouldn't have brought Tommy home if she knew Evan was going to bring Eddie back. He said he would be out tonight with Eddie, that usually meant Evan wouldn't be home until late the next day.

"And you said you were going out, so we came here."

"When do I stay out all night?" (Y/n) retaliated, but her tone was defeated and she let her head flop onto Tommy's shoulder who was staying very composed and calm.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going out with Tommy?" Evan waved his hand out towards Tommy who stared at him with a mixture of emotions in his eyes.

They weren't doing this to upset or aggravate Evan, they didn't want him to be annoyed that they were together. And they didn't want him to come home and find them in a compromising position like this. This was the last thing they would have wanted if they had a choice.

All of their wires had just gotten a little crossed tonight.

"Because you'd give him the third degree."

"I wouldn't-"

"Evan," (Y/n) groaned quietly and tilted her head to one side. They both knew he would.

It was written all over Eddie's face too. Eddie dragged his hand across his jaw, sharing a sorrowful look with (Y/n) before he moved his hand to cup the back of Evan's neck and leaned closer to him.

"Babe, you did go for her last boyfriend, and then you scared off that guy at the station who tried to ask her out-"

"He fucking attacked her that was different!" Evan wanted to pull away, but he couldn't find the will when both Eddie's hands cupped his face and tilted his head down so they were level again.

Eddie wasn't telling him off or trying to make him feel bad, he was rationalising. When Evan witnessed (Y/n)'s ex physically hurting her, he had stormed in and beaten him to a pulp. And a few months later when a friend at the station tried to ask (Y/n) out, Evan warned him off. He didn't want anyone going near his sister unless he knew and fully trusted them. It was the only way Evan knew how to keep his twin safe.

"Yes, but you would of said something to Tommy, and we all know it." Eddie's thumb brushed across the corner of Evan's mouth in a way that he knew would make Evan go weak at the knees and send his brain malfunctioning.

With her teeth sinking into her bottom lip, (Y/n) took Tommy's hand that was resting on her knee and entwined their fingers together before she stood up. She could see the confusion pooling in Tommy's eyes when she tugged him up from the sofa and began walking.

He wasn't sure what she was doing or where she was trying to take him when he was only in his boxers and she was wearing nothing but her underwear and his shirt that left little to the imagination.

"Night boys."

(Y/n) locked eyes with Eddie for a few seconds and she smiled softly when he patted her shoulder and nodded.

Tommy walked past both men with an uncertain look in his eyes and an apologetic smile on his lips meant for Evan. He didn't mean to cause a row or create problems between the siblings. But he let (Y/n) guide him to the stairs and his hands moved to hold her hips as he followed her up.

(Y/n) wasn't about to let Tommy go home. Not when things had been going in a great direction before her brother's untimely arrival. They were here first and Tommy was staying; they would just have to take things up to the bedroom instead.

"That's my sister- he's- he-" Evan pointed madly towards the stairs, desperate to follow them and drag Tommy back down before he could get into his sister's room. Into her bed. But he couldn't do very much with Eddie's hands still cupping his face and the kisses peppering the corner of his mouth which made Evan feel weak.

"Buck, leave it. They're happy, it's none of our business."

"But-"

"Come on, we'll go to my place."

***

Tilting his head to one side, Eddie looked across the court towards the car that had just pulled up. A grin slowly spread across his face and he reached out, patting his hand down on his boyfriend's shoulder to gain his attention before he pointed across.

Evan briefly looked over at Eddie on his right before he tried to see what he was pointing at.

The smile faded from his lips.

Tommy was here. And he'd brought (Y/n) along.

Why was Tommy bringing (Y/n) here? How did he get her to agree to come here? She never came to play basketball when Evan asked her, or even when Eddie asked nicely. She always turned them down. The one time she had tagged along, she had played referee and watched instead of joining in.

But here she was, Evan's best friend, his twin, the other half to his personality. Walking across the court wearing a pair of black biking shorts and a grey vest top that matched what Evan was wearing.

"Hey guys!" Eddie clapped his hand down on Tommy's shoulder and leaned over to give (Y/n) a hug. "How'd you get her here, she always says no to us."

He nudged his shoulder into Evan's arm, knocking his boyfriend out of his frozen stance as he looked between the pair of them.

"I have my ways." The way Tommy shrugged sent Evan's blood fizzling in his veins and when Tommy patted his shoulder, Evan tried not to cringe.

This was supposed to be their time to play and if anyone should have gotten (Y/n) to join in, it should have been Evan. They were twins, they were closer to each other than to anyone else in the world. He should have been able to get his twin to tag along and play a game with them.

It was Evan who got (Y/n) out of the apartment after everything that happened with her ex. It was him who walked her to work and to the shops and who made her feel comfortable and who calmed her down from her panic attacks when she thought she saw her ex hanging around street corners.

"What are the teams?" (Y/n) clasped her hands together behind her back and leaned up into Tommy's side.

Her eyes locked with her brother and they shared a silent look before something seemed to click in Evan's mind and he forced himself to smile.

"What about couples? You two go with Marc's team, we're with Chim." Eddie pointed behind him where the rest of the guys were splitting into equal teams and Chimney waved them over.

"Sounds good."

"You know you're gonna lose, right?"

Evan's words were so abrupt and out of the blue that (Y/n) took a step back. She couldn't work out whether he was talking to her or to Tommy. But her brother's expression was one to be fearful of.

His eyes were narrowed, his upper lip was curled in distaste and he had both hands on his hips with the basketball tucked under his left arm.

"I wouldn't be so sure of that." With a sweet smile on her lips, (Y/n) stepped forward and knocked the basketball from his elbow and took off into a sprint towards Chimney. "Try to keep up, Evan."

If Evan wanted to get competitive, (Y/n) would match his attitude. She would go ten for ten with him on this and do her very best to beat him. They usually played on the same team, they were a well oiled machine together and they both hated losing.

Two could play at this game.

(Y/n) could feel the sweat glistening on her forehead and trickling down the back of her neck towards her vest.

She rolled her neck into place and straightened her shoulders to click her spine before she took a look around. The sun was beating down so hard that she could barely see properly, all the colours were blending together in front of her eyes and with everyone running around the court, it made it even harder.

She suddenly wished they were all wearing vests like they did back in school because it was getting hard to remember who was on her team and who wasn't.

Her hands held out in front of her and she nodded when Tommy spun on his back foot and looked her way.

As soon as the ball was in her hands, (Y/n) twisted her back towards Eddie and tried to speed up. She did her best to ignore the way her knees were aching and crying out and how her body felt like it was made of wax, melting down in the midday sun.

It wasn't hard to feel Eddie on her heels, trying to keep pace with her and prevent her from reaching the end of the court.

When she realised Eddie's arms were stretched out for her, just about to take the ball from her hands, (Y/n) pushed up. She went on her tiptoes and cracked the heel of her hand against the basketball, throwing it as hard as she could.

Her hands moved to her hips and she gasped to catch her breath back, but her eyes widened in their sockets and she felt a jolt of electricity roll down her spine when the ball went through the net.

She scored.

(Y/n) wasn't great at landing a goal unless it was on the basketball machines in the arcades. She only tossed the ball so Eddie wouldn't take it from her and to keep it on their side of the court.

"Yes!"

Clapping her hands together, (Y/n) tossed her arms up in the air and grinned, gasping when a pair of strong arms suddenly bolted around her waist.

She tilted her head back and reached a hand behind her to cup the back of Tommy's neck. Smiling breathlessly as he kissed her temple and gave her hips a squeeze.

"That's my girl."

(Y/n) turned her head to catch his lips in a proper kiss. Just a quick, fleeting touch that left them both breathless and seeing stars. Her nails scratched down the back of Tommy's neck, earning a quiet hiss in her ear before she turned to look behind her.

"I thought you were supposed to be good at this?" She quipped breathlessly, arching a brow when Eddie shook his head and locked his hands behind his head to catch a proper breath.

"Eddie come on."

(Y/n) rolled her lips together and winced when she looked over at her brother. He wasn't happy. If he was calling Eddie by his name then that meant they were either going to have an argument or that Evan wasn't pleased. Much like (Y/n) had never heard Eddie call her brother by his name, even when arguing he stuck to calling him Buck, something (Y/n) couldn't bring herself to do.

Tommy kissed the back of (Y/n)'s head and gave her a lasting squeeze before he jogged over to the middle of the court and (Y/n) moved ahead while Eddie took the ball.

She could see that if her brother didn't win this game, he wasn't going to be speaking to any of them for a while.

After ten minutes of throwing the ball back and forth to each end of the court, (Y/n) found herself on the opposite end. Her eyes locked on Chimney who was dribbling the ball towards the middle of the court, Tommy and Marc hot on his heels with Eddie on the sidelines waiting to be passed the ball.

Moving forward, (Y/n) made a beeline towards Chimney but she could see her brother thinking the same thing, moving in the same direction.

They moved from opposite angles of the court and came together near the middle. If they were teens again, (Y/n) knew their elbows would have been nudging each other and they would have resorted to pushing each other out the way if they were on opposite teams.

"Chim pass the ball."

"Come on, I'm open."

"Pass it this way."

All the voices mixed together as both Eddie and Evan moved over to show they were free and able to take a psss.

While Marc and (Y/n) tried to move and block off any pass. (Y/n) got closer to her brother, trying to smile his way but she could see the look of concentration on his face. He was determined to win. Maybe a little too determined.

When Chimney turned to pass the ball, both (Y/n) and Evan lunged at the same time.

A scream burst past (Y/n)'s lips and her eyes began to water fiercely when when she felt her brother's elbow smash into her nose.

Both (Y/n)'s hands flapped out in front of her, unsure whether to reach out and cradle her nose or try and grab onto someone when she stumbled. She felt Evan stumble into her and his force knocked her off balance, sweeping her legs from beneath her.

The moment (Y/n)'s head collided with the floor, she felt stars dancing in front of her eyes as her brain switched off. All the voices on the court turned into static in her ears. Stars glistened in front of her eyes which she couldn't open from how badly they were watering and how strong the sun was as it shone down directly on her.

A round of trembling set in through her body while she barely managed to move her hands to cover her face.

"(Y/n)? Hey, are you with me?"

Going down on his knees, Tommy leaned down and gently held onto (Y/n)'s wrists that were trembling. He slowly pulled her hands away from her face and gripped her chin, tilting her head towards him to he could try and assess her.

"Can I sit you up, sweetheart?" He let go of her chin and wormed his hand around to hold the back of her neck instead.

His fingertips pressed into the base of her neck and he held her arm as he slowly hoisted her up so she was sitting up. He nodded when Chimney moved round to crouch on (Y/n)'s other side while Eddie tossed the ball off the court. He moved to hold onto Evan's shoulder who crouched down next to (Y/n)'s ankle, sorrow and panic splashed all across his face.

As soon as she was sat up, (Y/n) felt like someone had run her over with a truck.

Her bleary, watering eyes managed to open and barely had chance to look at Tommy's furrowed expression before she groaned. Her fingers curled shakily around Tommy's arm that was by her side as he continued to hold her head up.

But the smallest whimper left (Y/n)'s lips when her nose ached and her head felt like it had been pumped full of air.

Blood started to gush down her nose and she could feel the droplets pooling over her parted lips causing them to tingle and quake. The lightheaded feeling took over until (Y/n)'s eyes rolled to the back of her head and her head flopped forward.

"Oh- okay, okay." Tommy braced his chest and deadlocked his fingers around the back of (Y/n)'s neck as her temple fell onto his right shoulder.

"Shit, someone grab a towel please." Leaning forward, Chimney held onto (Y/n)'s shoulders and tried to keep her sitting up.

When someone handed them a towel, Tommy cupped either side of (Y/n)'s neck in his hands and Chimney pinched the bridge of her nose. He kept her head angled down a little and pressed the towel just beneath her nose. They didn't want her head back in case she swallowed or choked on the blood.

"Jesus Buck, what the Hell were you doing?" Eddie gave his boyfriend a light clip around the back of his head while his brows furrowed and he looked across at (Y/n).

How hard had Evan clocked her to give her a nosebleed and cause her to pass out?

"I- I didn't mean to!"

After a few seconds, Tommy noticed (Y/n)'s arm twitching against his and he sighed in utter relief when she tried to give his wrist a squeeze. She slumped her cheek against Tommy's shoulder and blinked furiously, trying to gather her senses and clear her head that felt like it had been stuffed with cotton wool.

"I think the bleedings stopping now. Do you feel okay?" Chimney dropped the towel onto (Y/n)'s lap, grimacing at how much blood was lathering the previously white cotton.

"My head kills," (Y/n) murmured gruffly, trying to motion to the back of her head but she didn't have the energy.

Her brows furrowed and she huffed when her eyes finally came back into focus. She locked gazes with her brother and her lips curled before she reached out to shakily swat him in the thigh.

"Why'd you t-tackle me?"

"I didn't! I- I swear I didn't mean to, my elbow caught you it was an accident."

"You've probably got a mild concussion. Do you want to head to the emergency room, or do you think you'll be okay?" Tommy grazed his fingertips along the back of (Y/n)'s head and although she winced, he could only feel a small lump of swelling.

There was no cut to the back of her head and she hadn't gone down with a bang. The chances were she hadn't done any damage, but he would take her to the hospital if she wanted him to, just to be safe. Someone was going to have to stay with her for the next few hours just to make sure she didn't have any lasting damage or sickness.

"Can you take me home please?" She didn't want to sit in the emergency room and wait over two hours to be seen by a nurse. (Y/n) wasn't in agony, although she was going to have to get some painkillers when they got back. She just wanted to go home.

"Sure. Up on three, ready?" He quietly counted to three and nodded at Chimney who held (Y/n)'s elbow and her waist. They eased her up between them and (Y/n) deadlocked her hands around Tommy's exposed arm, leaning into his chest when her knees started to shake.

She felt Tommy's left arm secure around her waist and his right hand smoothed up and down her arm reassuringly while he kissed the top of her head.

Reaching out, (Y/n) grabbed her brother's hand and gave a sharp tug. "Come on." The silent undertone to her voice and the look in her eyes said it all.

We need to talk.

Evan whispered a quiet "I'll call you," in Eddie's ear and stole a kiss before he squeezed his sister's hand and helped walk her towards Tommy's car.

(Y/n) let herself to limp and smiled tiredly when Tommy helped her up into the back of the car. And before Evan could panic about where to sit, (Y/n) pointed. He could sit in the back with her.

(Y/n) could feel her temple throbbing and there was a bump on the back of her head that felt like it was swelling up and becoming the size of the basketball they had been messing around with. She moved her hand to cradle the back of her head, smothering a whimper while she flopped her free hand out to hold Evan's hand.

"I'm really sorry." The look in Evan's eyes made (Y/n)'s stomach twist itself into knots. She wanted to cry at the sadness pooling in his baby blue orbs.

"Why'd you get defensive with me?"

It was in Evan's nature to be competitive, sure. (Y/n) understood that. But his competitive streak never usually put Evan against her or made him so pent up that he would get rough when playing sports like that. Evan was like a puppy dog, tackling and barging into her and getting so frustrated during a game wasn't in his nature.

"Why'd you agree when Tommy asked you to come here? You never came when I asked you."

"Because I told her I wanted to make an effort to get along with you." Tommy sighed and dragged his fingers through his toussled, damp hair as he pulled out of the car park.

It was Tommy's idea to join in the basketball game because he wanted to try and get to know Evan better. He knew that if he wanted things to work out between him and (Y/n), he needed to be on Evan's good side and try to get along with him. The twins were a package deal and Tommy wanted to have a good friendship with Evan and a good working relationship with (Y/n).

"I wasn't trying to compete with you Evan, or make you feel out of place." That was never Tommy's intention.

"I just… we look out for each other." Evan looked down at his hands and the way (Y/n) was gliding her thumb across the back of his hand. "We do stick together, you're my best friend, you know? I look after you, thinking of someone else doing that is scary. You relying on someone else is scary for me."

They were each other's best friend. With Eddie it was different, he was Evan's partner and it felt entirely different to talk to and confide in Eddie. But with (Y/n), she had always been there for Evan.

He looked after her, he protected her, it was his job and it was all he wanted to do after things went sour with her ex. Seeing her get close to someone else frightened Evan, especially because he liked Tommy. He didn't want to get close to Tommy and then have to get defensive if Tommy did anything to hurt (Y/n).

And seeing (Y/n) go out with Tommy and trust him and rely on him was strange because Evan was the person she always relied on.

"No one's gonna replace you, Evan. You've got Eddie," (Y/n) glanced her eyes forward and looked at Tommy through the rear view mirror. "I've got Tommy, but I'll always need my brother around."

"Good." Evan smiled bashfully and looked down at their entwined hands. That was what he'd needed to hear, whether he knew it or not.

"But you concuss me again and we'll fall out."

[webslingingslasher]

Hii Ik your resquests are currently closed so you obvs don’t have to do it but when you’re up for it could you please do a part 2 w nerdy Peter on their first date. But take your time to rest and everything just thought I’d put this in for good measure ❤️

*cleaning out my drafts*

pt 1.

'first time?' peter slightly turns, it's an older man, probably mid forties and he gets an instant dad vibe. he's comfortable nodding at his question.

he's been standing in front of bouquets for at least seven minutes, nothing seems right. peter wants to make the best impression, but what if he got your least favorite flowers?

'is it a date?'

peter nods again, 'yeah. and she's super out of my league.'

the dad smiles, 'they usually are.' then steps up, he takes his time looking over each flower wrapped in cellophane.

'there's not much to go wrong on, kid. don't get the artificially dyed ones and choose something with some flowers that haven't opened up all the way. they'll last longer and smell better.'

peter feels alright with speaking his nerves to him, 'what if she hates them?'

his temporary mentor picks up a bouquet, it looks beautiful, he was right. the plastic is pushed into peter's chest, his hand wraps around the stems. 'then you bought flowers for an asshole, don't make the same mistake twice.'

it makes peter feel better, he really doesn't think he's buying flowers for an asshole.

-----

you like them. at least he thinks you do, your face lit up and you were quick to do a smell test. you even told him he did a good job at picking them out.

'these are beautiful, peter!' he's lucky he didn't buy flowers for an asshole. you delicately set them down, 'these are going in my room, by the way.' you didn't dare share the beauty with the rest of the house.

'i'm glad you like them,' he really is. peter feels the need to add how nice you look, he's not too sure on how to compliment a woman but he knows he has to try.

'you um, you look very pretty.' yikes, that sounds like he doesn't think you're pretty the rest of the time. 'you always look very pretty, but this is a different kind, like, cause it's the first time i've seen you all dressed up.'

did he just tell you he likes you better this way? peter widens his eyes, the date hasn't even started and he's already sweating. 'i mean, you didn't have to dress up for me, wait, no, you dressed for yourself. but i just meant...' he really doesn't know what he meant, but you look entirely way too amused at his fluster.

'keep going, i'm really enjoying this.'

a gentle tease at his nervous personality. he really likes it coming from you.

'i'd rather not.'

you smile wide, 'i love hearing how pretty i am tonight, but actually all the time, but differently this time, but also not. and how you like my outfit, but not too much, because all my other outfits look just as good and i definitely don't dress for the male gaze.'

it sounds like you're making fun of him, but your smile tells him you actually really like it.

'don't worry, peter. i'd act the same way if you were in a tux.' peter glances down, 'should i go put one on?' biting your lip at his joke, you push his shoulder, 'next time.'

peter's head is spinning when you pull him out the door by his hand, it's been five minutes and there's already another? you must have a thing for socially awkward guys.

---

peter watches you glance around the restaurant, he hopes he picked good. it's nice, but not nice enough to be weird.

'you're pulling out all the stops for me, mr. parker.'

peter hopes you don't notice his blush, he thinks you do when you lean closer. 'i mean, flowers and a medium fancy restaurant? you're raising my standards very quickly.'

you mean it, too. peter knows he has no experience under the belt but you've been on a few dates, nothing that stuck from what he's overheard but he can't fathom how this tops any of it.

'really? i thought you would've had better dates.'

you hum, 'maybe. one question for you, then i can let you know if this is the best date.' peter can handle that, he's good at questions. 'i'm ready.'

'what can i get to drink?'

peter tilts his head, he might not be that good at questions. 'anything you want?'

it's the right answer, you grin across the table. 'i can get a coke and you won't cheap out on me?'

peter laughs, that's what he was up against? 'so i can pay for a dinner but draw the line at soda?'

you don't directly confirm it, 'some would.'

'as long as it's not rootbeer, i'm alright with it.' your eyebrow raises, 'not a fan?' peter scoffs, 'it's like the kitchen sink of sodas, it poured all the leftovers into a giant vat and lied to everyone about liking it.'

you laugh quietly, 'who's it?'

peter is completely serious, 'capitalism.' you bite back a grin as he shifts forward a little. 'so, um, was your dad mad that you canceled for me?' your fingers tap the table, 'nope. not when i told him why.'

'wow, the first dad i know who's okay with their daughter dating.'

you stop him, 'oh, he's not crazy about the dating part. he likes the who.'

peter can't help but feel slightly offended, 'am i really that non-threatening?' suddenly your dad was okay when he was the suitor? peter really is out of his league and everyone knows it.

'oh no, you're the most threatening of them all. you're the only guy i've ever liked, so my dad was excited for me, but also a little scared because you're the strongest bet at his daughter dating someone.'

peter's heart is thumping harder than it ever has, if he wasn't in your eyesight he'd be counting his pulse. he wants to kick himself a little, he has no idea how much time he's wasted by not asking sooner. how many guys have you wished were him?

he's not able to respond, but you don't mind. the waiter has your attention, when he asks for your drink you shoot a look at peter with a gleam in your eye.

'do you have rootbeer?'

peter thinks he's gonna have a girlfriend real soon.

-----

on the walk back to your home, you had forced your fingers between his. peter can't remember the last time he held hands with someone, but it feels nice holding yours.

you swing them back and forth as you talk, he thinks the deal was secured when he brushed chocolate crumbs off your cheek from dessert because immediately after you had tied your hand into his and held him close.

'i had a very nice night, and just in case you need me to say it, that was the best date i've ever had.'

peter feels shy, but it's welcomed with you. 'you're just saying that cause i bought you rootbeer.'

you bump your elbow against his, 'next time i'll buy you a milkshake.' you weren't lying, you had a nice night. so nice you want to do it again and if peter's really lucky, you'll want to keep doing it forever.

'careful, i'll hold you to that.' he really will, peter loves milkshakes.

'i will, i love milkshakes. i have a secret place i go to all the time in the west village.' peter's eyes widen, 'west village? that's a haul for a milkshake.'

you press a hand to your forehead, 'oh no! a whole afternoon with you, how yucky!' peter hides his smile, it's nice that you want him around. 'if we get milkshakes does that mean you want a second date?'

'yes. and if i do good enough you might want a third out of me.' peter laughs, it's adorable you think he might want a third date. 'we might as well plan the fourth one now, huh?'

you bounce your arm off his. 'i think you should kiss me.' peter's jolted from his date daydream. kiss? peter plays it cool. 'what, right now?' he can't hide anything, you hear an undertone of panic but you skim over it.

'well, i'd prefer if it wasn't at my front door where i'm at risk of being seen because if my dad catches you all over me before he could meet you, i don't think he'll like you anymore.'

'so i should kiss you? right now?' peter's voice is hitched, you didn't mean to throw him off his game. you know he's a little more reserved so you were giving him the open shot, but you think you stressed him out even more.

'you don't have to! i was just offering because i thought you were going to try and do something at my door.'

peter's thankful for the night sky and the cool breeze that's chilling his burning face. 'i've never kissed anyone.' peter stops walking because you stopped. you've got an open jaw and a dead stare on him.

'repeat that.'

he'd rather not. 'i've never kissed anyone.'

you shake your head, the words aren't making sense. 'one more time.'

this is kind of a nightmare. 'i've never kissed anyone.'

'you're lying, right? this is a joke?' why is peter feeling a little insulted right now? 'it's not weird. i know several people who haven't kissed anyone yet.'

you scrunch your face up. 'no, peter, i'm not judging you because you haven't. i'm confused about how you haven't. like, no girl has ever tried to kiss you?'

'no.' it's an instant answer.

'not even as a kid or something?'

'never.'

you feel offended on his behalf, oh well, more for yourself. you stand straighter and give him what he's been missing out on. 'if you'd let me, i'd love to kiss you.'

'really?' sure, peter might've scored a second date but a kiss too? his first one at that. 'yeah.' you step up, peter can feel his heart pounding. he knows he's awkward, he's unsure of his stance, he doesn't know how to lean into it.

'it's instinct. don't panic, okay?' easier said than done because peter swears he's at risk of throwing up when you loop your arms around his neck. you bounce up on your feet, just a tad, the rest of your weight brings peter down to your level.

there's a brief moment of nerves but they're not bad. it's exciting, it's thrilling, it's new. your gaze bounces between his eyes and his mouth, you think he catches on and does the same.

one final moment before you seal the deal, peter parker is going to be all yours. your heart races when you lean in, your lips brush against his feather soft.

one, two- you swear sparks fly. peter's warm and gentle. he's unsure and it makes the kiss so much better. a hesitant hold on your hips when your chest bumps his, you add a little movement- you're not trying to add too much, but god, you'd pay fat dollars to explore him further.

peter pulls away first, you almost claw him back into you. 'i'm sorry.' you lightly shake your head, he has nothing to be sorry for. 'i think i'm bad at kissing.'

'you couldn't be farther from the truth, parker. you're the best one.'

peter doesn't believe you for a second. 'really?'

'yeah. cause it's you.'

peter melts. 'i think you're an angel sent from heaven for me.' peter isn't sure if he's religious or not, and he was leaning towards not but now he thinks there has to be angels because you're proof of one.

you look away, you've never been complimented like that before. an unearthly creature whose only purpose was divine intervention, how could you not give him another kiss?

peter's surprised at this one.

'what was that for?'

'because you're really nice, super smart and kind of the hottest person i've ever seen.' compliments? you're giving him compliments? 'that's nice, but i think you're talking to yourself.'

you frown. a true grumpy look crosses over your face. 'don't do that. don't sell yourself short or act like you're not deserving of praise because i'm going to be doing a lot of it and i need you to accept it.'

before he could try to fight it, you start pulling him along. you do have a curfew after all. peter's fighting back disbelief. 'angel. i swear you're an angel.'

you shrug, 'i'm your angel.'

'you are.'

when you get home, you get a third kiss. and this time, peter kisses you. 

[lowkeyrobin]

yesss love, just saw that ur accepting requests heheheh 🥰🥰

Could I request a Minho x fem reader one, where the gladers are all chilling and having fun together by a lake in the deadheads (similar vibes to bonfire night) and some gladers decide to give her a “proper greenie welcome” by picking her up and throwing her in the lake. However, she can’t swim and tries to resist them but they don’t believe her so still throw her in. She almost drowns, crying for help and Minho jumps in and rescues her. Minho carries her out, and gets mad at them, almost picking a fight.

From here she sees Minho in a different light, could end in spice, if you’re willing, if not then it’s algds hehe 🙈

nah this is so cute lol ; also I do only write they/them / gn readers so I apologize 😭😭 but I'll try and not really specify gender at all to keep it really ambiguous ; i also dont write smut but i tried to make it a little like?? makeout? idk ; thank you for requesting, hope you enjoy! ; also I've seen at least one of ur other reqs to other creators and they're so 🙏🙏 trust me when I say writers love u

MINHO ; sweet memory

summary ; you find yourself looking at minho in a new light after almost drowning

warnings ; language, almost drowning, slightly heated kissing (?)

track ; wildflower and barley, hozier & allison russell

word count ; 1.7k

masterlist

You were the newest Greenie welcomed to the Glade. But, lucky for you, you remembered your name on your first night here. The amnesia was still getting you good here and there, but by the time the sun set on your second night, you were adapting well enough. A large group of you Gladers sit out on some logs in the Deadheads, the sun softly setting over the horizon of the maze walls as you sit around a little bonfire.

A small kind of lake structure sits beside the group, the soft sound of the streaming water filling your ears instead of all the other boys around you talking and chattering over drinks. You sit beside Minho, the Keeper of the Runners, sharing a drink with him. You took small sips here and there, just trying to fit in with the others under the blanket of trees and brush around you. Minho sits the glass jar back on the ground between his left leg and your right leg, talking to Fry a few feet away.

You're more focused on the water than anything else now as the boys talk loudly.

"What's the Greenie looking at?" Gally asks, an eyebrow raised as he talks in almost a mumble, looking between a few other Gladers.

Newt, sitting beside Fry, shrugs. Ben looks over at you, studying the dazed look in your eyes.

"Shank seems focused on the water," Ben speaks, giving a little shrug.

Gally's eyes light up as some invisible light bulb flicks on in his head. "Why don't we give them a proper Greenie welcome?"

"What're you suggesting, shuckface?" Jack sighs, sitting beside Gally.

A smirk tugs at the wannabe tough-guy's lips as he looks at you. You don't notice, as you're still zoned out, staring at the water.

"Let's throw them into the water for a minute"

Gally's plan had been set into motion behind mostly everyone's backs. Ben didn't say a word, considering he didn't actually think they'd be mean enough to throw the newest Greenie into that deep water. Newt and Fry hadn't heard as they'd been bickering about food, and the others, Winston, Minho, Eric, Adam, and Scott hadn't heard either.

Gally stands up, setting his special drink down. Jack, and Doug follow his actions, standing up and setting their definitely alcoholic beverages down. They sneak their way over to you, and stand over you, their shadows cast over you as well due to the fire.

You look up at them, shaking yourself out of your trance-like state.

"Can I help you?" You ask kindly, not wanting to start any drama.

Gally grabs you by the shoes, then Jack and Doug lift you up at your shoulders. They pull you toward the water, where you try and squirm out of their grip and fight back, but are unable to. The attention of the others is caught as they watch and laugh, thinking that your desperation to get away is to just not get wet and cold, unknowing that you couldn't swim.

Minho is the only one concerned, not knowing he was the only one to know that you couldn't swim. You'd brought it up when you first met him, explaining how you weren't much of a special soul, and that you couldn't swim or climb trees, or run that fast like some others could. It was a little dimwitted comment that clouded his vision in the moment.

"No, no, no, please! Please put me down!" For some reason, you didn't want to admit that you couldn't swim.

Doug hands over your other shoulder to Jack so he and Gally could rock and throw you into the water, standing off to the side. You continue to shout in protest as they begin rocking you side to side like they were reading a jump-in jump rope.

You look down at the water, fairly still, but clearly deep. You wouldn't be landing on rocks and busting your ass, you'd be drowning in five seconds if they didn't put you down.

Minho stands up, deciding to intervene as he sets his drink down. "Hey!"

"I can't swim! Put me down!-"

They toss you into the water, listening to your shriek of terror as the water splashes beneath your crashing weight. You reach your arms up as you'd fallen in on your rear, and kick your feet rapidly under you, unable to feel the bottom on your feet.

Being soaking wet was the least of your worries as you felt the water rush into your mouth, struggling to keep your head above the surface. You choke up the dirty, muddy water, trying to use any strength you had left in you to call for help and keep yourself floating.

Minho, now wide-eyed, quickly jumps in after you, realizing you truly couldn't swim. The water splashes under his weight like it did yours, and by the time he resurfaces, you'd fallen under the surface, water quickly filling up your lungs.

Newt quickly rushes forward, Frypan and Ben following him. Newt shoves Gally.

"What're you thinkin' klunkhead?! They said they couldn't swim, yet you throw them in that deep water!" He shouts, looking for an answer or at least some remorse.

Minho pulls you out of the water, the help of Fry and Ben leading you back up to land. You cough up a fair amount of water, completely dripping wet. Your clothes cling to your cold skin, weighing ten times their normal weight.

"What is wrong with you? Are you that shuckin' stupid?!"

Fry pulls Newt away from Gally before he potentially ends up in the slammer. Doug and Jack share unsympathetic looks, same as Gally. He uses the excuse that he didn't know until you shouted it at the last second, and it was just an innocent prank.

The second in command steps away from the three boys, rushing to your aid. Your legs hang over the little ledge, feet still emerged in the water. Minho is slapping your back, trying to help you cough all the water in your lungs and throat out.

Minho rubs your back softly as you finish coughing, your face pale, your eyes clearly showing the adrenaline rush and panic.

"You need the Med-Jacks, Greenie?" The blonde asks, one knee in the dirt while the other leg supports him.

You shake your head no, leaning forward as you pound at your chest and cough on command, wanting to make sure your airway was clear of any water or debris. Minho quickly stands up, stomping toward Gally to repeat the same things as Newt, the two essentially swapping roles.

"Are you stupid? Can't you leave anyone alone?!"

"It was a joke!"

"A joke that could've killed someone, Gally!"

You share a look with Newt.

"Thanks for like, helping me, by the way" You softly speak to Minho.

The group is now departing the Deadheads, seeing as the moon indicates that it's about one in the morning by now. The fire is slowly dying out, crackling as dead leaves crush under your feet while you walk away. You and the runner lag behind a bit, wanting to stay far away from Gally and his friends. Newt leads their way, making sure you're all accounted for. Gally, Doug, and Jack would only have to hope that the blonde wouldn't tell on them to Alby in the morning.

Minho nods in response to your thanks. "Yeah, of course. I mean, I know you can't swim, and it just." He holds his hands up to his head, mimicking an explosion as he opens them. "Sorry about them, really. I think they were just trying to innocently mess with you cause they didn't know, but they should've at least asked. They know that water is deep"

You nod, your hands stuffed in your pockets. You're still damp, but not as cold and not as wet, thanks to the fire. Luckily for all of you, Zart and Jeff didn't have to wake up at that hour to tend to you. They would've killed you all for that.

"Thanks for being nice to me and stuff, I appreciate it," you comment, feeling like you aren't remorseful or thankful enough as he'd probably saved your life.

"It's cool, Y/n." He lightly smiles, making sure you're able to see it.

The fact he called you by your actual name and not Greenie made butterflies rise in your stomach. You didn't even know why, just the thought of fitting in, with him, was infatuating. Your name on his tongue sounded like the most beautiful song you'd ever heard, like your brain was going to melt if you heard it again.

You both stop in your tracks, putting space between you two and the rest of the group, now at the edge of the Deadheads. You share soft smiles, exploring each other's eyes for some sort of look, which you mutually shared.

You lean against the tree behind you, trying to read his expression as he does the same. He's inches away, like he's taunting you.

"I think you owe me, actually," He smiles. Christ, he's really gonna dangle that over your head.

"How do you want me to repay you?" You ask with a soft chuckle. "Not much I can do"

He shrugs, leaning in a little closer. When he speaks, it's just above a whisper, sending a shiver up your spine. "I know that you know how use those lips of yours"

You quickly place your hands on his cheeks, closing the distance between your lips. His hands dig into your waist, pinning you against the tree. Your left hand transfers from his cheek and into his hair, tangling your fingers in it. You feel him melt into your lips, unable to not pull you any closer.

You can feel the bruises he's creating against your lips, the way he's draining your lungs of air for the second time tonight.

He pulls away, needing to control himself. "Thanks, Y/n." He smiles before jogging away, wanting to catch up before Newt discovered their lack of presence.

You watch as he jogs away, then walk behind him as he's a few yards away, a goofy smile on your face.

"Thanks, Minho," you whisper under your breath.

[1d1195]

Sun-Kissed I

Here is a fluffy/smutty little piece of love on the beach. It’s ~9k words. It’s a love at first sight kind of thing I know it’s kind of ridiculous for them to be falling in love so fast but it’s my story and I’m sticking with it. Also, sorry that I’m really into sunflowers right now. Sunflower Vol. 6 has been on my mind lately so that’s gonna make an appearance for the third time as of late. I don’t know if anyone else cares about all my little easter eggs regarding real life Harry in my writing but I’m really pretty proud of the news one I put in here. I'm sorry they're both teachers again I needed them to have summer's off to make this work. Their careers are not a major part of the story.

Warnings: There’s some pretty 18+ things happening here. Masturbating, public sex (kinda), thigh riding, etc. If you’re not into this, I wouldn’t read it. It's all fluff otherwise. There won't be a bit of angst.

I've been trying to write this for over a year and finally came pouring out. Unfortunately, there will be a second part next Thursday only because I thought it was getting too long. So it does end a little abruptly. Hope you enjoy anyway :)

Harry was fascinated by her, simply put. He wanted to spend forever at dinner with her. Chatting with her. Looking at her beautiful face. Envying how the sun got to kiss her, and he didn’t.

Harry didn’t grow up near a beach so he thought this would be great way to cash in on his vacation time over the summer. Sitting at the beach, reading a book, and dipping his toes in the water when it got too hot. His mum knew someone who knew someone who gave him a great deal on the summer rental, and he was beyond excited to sit and relax for the first time in years.

Being an earlier riser had its advantages. For one, he got the pick of where to set up his summer getaway on the beach. He brought a cooler, a chair, and a few towels along with a book or two to spend the day. Through his sunglasses, he faced the direction of the sunshine. He hadn’t had a proper summer holiday since he was young and now that he was busy teaching and had summer’s off, he was elated to have some time to himself.

Once he settled his belongings, he turned on a summer playlist he’d been working on for a while. He didn’t turn it up loud—he would never want to bother anyone that may join him on the beach—but it was loud enough to hear and not interrupt his imagination while reading.

It was utterly peaceful.

Apparently, Harry was unaware of just how truly peaceful the beach could be.

“Hey,” a voice said softly, it was sweet. A gentle shake on the arm, her skin was cool to the touch. His eyes blinked open unsurely. He realized he fell asleep and didn’t even get through the first page of his book. “Hi,” she whispered with a gentle smile. “You’re going to start burning,” she explained handing over a bottle of sunscreen to his hands while Harry tried to wake himself up. “And your book is in the sand,” she said grabbing it before the spine broke from all the grains of the beach ruining the binding.

“Oh,” he shook his head desperate for his brain to catch up to his surroundings. “Thanks,” he said gratefully.

“No problem!” She chirped heading back to the chair that was a few meters in front of him. “I already burned once this summer and it was miserable. Just don’t want you to suffer the same fate.”

He pushed open the bottle and started rubbing on the sunscreen. It felt like he was going to have a slight burn already. The relief of the lotion on his skin made him wary. “Ah, guess...I should probably leave,” he chuckled. “Try again tomorrow.”

“Oh...if you want to stay, I have an umbrella,” she said cheerfully. “S’a nice day, just give me a minute to set up,” she smiled and gave her name to Harry.

Harry had hardly gotten a good look at her with a sleepy set of eyes a bit wiped by the sun. His brain was foggy with the impromptu nap. This small little town he was staying in had the vibe that someone like her would help a stranger. Everyone had been so nice in the grocery store and when Harry went for his run yesterday, people said hello and commented on how nice the evening was. It was an adorable little town and Harry was already dreading having to leave in two weeks’ time.

“Well, thank you. M’Harry,” he said quietly while he finished rubbing the lotion over his body. He watched her work, his mind less foggy. Glancing at his watch, he noted it was a little over two hours since he arrived. It wasn’t too hot outside still, so his burn would be minor if he got one at all. With the addition of a blanket and the umbrella, it was almost a mirror image of Harry’s little set up. A chair, a cooler, and a couple towels.

She had a ponytail pulled through a baseball cap and she wore a button down, rolled to the elbows. The top few buttons were open revealing a deep blue bathing suit top, that scooped low enough to show off...

Harry had to be careful, or he was going to be sporting a prominent erection on a beach with a ton of families. He moved his gaze down past where he really wanted to look. The shirt came down to just above her knee and he saw a pair of flip flops discarded to the side of the blanket she had laid out in front of her stuff. “Nice day, huh?” She smiled as she twirled the umbrella stand into the sand.

“Tits—it’s really nice,” Harry said quickly stammering through his recovery.

Smooth.

She either didn’t notice his faux pas or didn’t care because she continued about her business. “Have you been here long?” She asked.

“Just arrived yesterday. Did some grocery shopping. Went for a jog.”

“Oh, how nice,” she had this infectious smile. Harry felt so happy just being around her. Or maybe it was the beautiful weather and the prettiest beach he had seen in years.

Or maybe it was her curvy figure that was making him lightheaded with happiness.

She pulled the shirt off finally, and Harry thought he might seriously need to leave. Head back for his little beach cottage to take care of blood rushing to his groin. She’s gorgeous. He thought to himself. “How ‘bout you?” He cleared his throat.

“I grew up here...and live here in the summer.”

He stared at her in surprise. “Here?” He asked.

She smiled and nodded. “It’s my favorite place on earth,” she explained.

“I can see why,” he nodded in appreciation. “Do you have any suggestions for while m’here?”

She nodded. “Plenty—how long are you here for?”

“Two weeks.”

“How lovely...let’s see...you’re at the beach—that’s most important in my opinion. I think if you stay here most of the time, you’ll have a successful vacation. There’s a place about twenty minutes from here where you can go clam digging if you like clams—I don’t really like them, but it’s fun to go. Paddleboarding on the river is also a really big thing. There’s this restaurant that everyone talks about. If you want, I know someone who works there, I could get you in. You’ll need a sweatshirt from the most touristy of tourist shops, but don’t go on a rainy day—everyone will be there. You’ll have to see the sunrise and the sunset. I think there’s a full moon too, so you’ll definitely want to see that over the ocean. I personally recommend ice cream and mini golf too. If you have time, you should also check out the nearby island. Even though this place is beautiful the island is like being in another country. It’s stunningly beautiful,” throughout her speech she continued working on the umbrella stand, putting the actual umbrella into place and tilting it back to create more shade.

Harry thought it would be really forward of him to invite her on all those adventures. Especially when someone as beautiful as she was surely had a significant other. Add in the fact he met her less than ten minutes ago; he would have seemed insane. “Wow, sounds like a packed schedule.”

She laughed and Harry swore he had never heard a sound as beautiful. She was still organizing her items and she gestured under the umbrella for Harry to move his stuff. “I’m really passionate about this place I forget people want to relax.”

“S’okay,” he chuckled. “You’re right t’be passionate. M’sure you’re right; I’ll make every effort t’do it all,” he promised and began moving his stuff below her umbrella. “Everyone is so nice here,” he told her. “Yourself included.”

“Why thank you,” she smiled sweetly and settled into her beach chair finally, facing the sun. He swore that someone this stunning couldn’t be real. She looked like a beach goddess—sun-kissed hair and skin. “What are you reading?” She asked, turning her head toward him covering the side of her face to keep the sun out of her eyes even though she wore sunglasses too.

He couldn’t even remember why he picked the book up. “Er...I fell asleep before finishing the first page,” he admitted shyly. She giggled.

“The beach does that, I swear. Something about total relaxation and the warm sun. I’m like a cat. Once I lay on my stomach, I’m out like a light.”

“Do you read?”

She nodded. “Have to; I’m a middle school teacher.”

“Oh,” Harry smiled. “I teach secondary.”

“No way!”

So, for the whole morning, Harry forgot about his book. Forgot about his playlist that was still going—except for anytime she asked what song was playing. They talked for literally three hours straight never once a lull in the conversation. Work, books, the beach, music, and anything they thought of. He told her about his family coming to visit for the weekend and she told him about her family who didn’t love this place as much as she did who would probably not visit—even if they missed her and loved her with everything in them.

At lunch they finally quieted their conversation to eat and watch the water. “I don’t see a burn,” she told him glancing over his face and skin as she finished her sandwich. He smiled.

“Thank you,” he said gratefully. “I’d be a proper crisp by now.”

She held the sunscreen out to him again. “I know this is a little weird, would you mind getting my upper back?” She asked.

Touch her? Harry didn’t have to be asked twice. Harry made sure to spray every bit of her skin. He didn’t want to be the reason she burned. As soft and beautiful as her skin was, Harry was glad she only asked to rub her back and shoulders. If he had to do her legs or any other part of her body, he definitely would have passed out.

She spread herself out on her blanket. Book near her face. “I’m so going to fall asleep,” she yawned. “Will you wake me if I start to burn?” She asked.

Harry nodded wordlessly and brought his book up toward his face. “Sure, love,” he murmured. Hopefully not showing how smitten he was with her already.

*

Harry might have wormed his way into her heart as her favorite person ever. It was so unlike her to wake a total stranger from a nap. But he was one of the most beautiful men she had ever seen in her life. She couldn’t imagine letting him roast in the sun all morning and ruining his vacation. It was even more unlike her to invite him to sit with her.

She liked to believe she was a kind soul—most everyone told her that she was, so it wasn’t unnatural for her to invite him to hang out with her. But if it wasn’t for the fact that Harry was a teacher, it could have been a lot more dicey.

It was so easy to talk to Harry. The entire morning was so much better than she ever expected just by being in his presence or chatting with him. Other than her reading-nap—where Harry woke her up after an hour so she could reapply another layer of sunscreen—they talked literally the whole day. Harry didn’t mind putting sunscreen on her and she returned the favor when they switched positions so Harry could get some on his back.

Touching him might be her new favorite pastime.

She left a bit before Harry wanting to go for a walk and shower before eating dinner and reading a bit on her porch. Plus, she had to pace herself if she was going to last at the beach all summer. After her shower, she put on an oversized shirt like she wore to the beach and a pair of shorts. It looked like she wasn’t wearing pants but didn’t mind. The sun finally crested the top of her cottage, so she was no longer baking in the sun and made the porch the loveliest little place to read and enjoy the evening. She had a bowl of watermelon chunks beside her, and sunglasses perched on her nose.

Growing up she never loved summer all that much. Of course, she loved the beach and the time off from school, but she started working part time when she was fourteen and summer never had the same feeling as it did when she was young until she started teaching. Now she would tutor virtually some nights throughout the summer—especially for college students taking summer courses. But mostly she spent her time here in the little beach cottage her grandma had specifically named to her in her will after she saw how much she cared for it—especially since she was the only one in her family who had summers off and still cared about this little town. Once her grandma passed away, no one really felt the need to stay—her parents sold the home she grew up in. It wasn’t brokenly tragic that her grandma died—she was old, and these things happened. Besides, she felt by being in the little town she grew up in and living in the cottage left to her was enough to live her summers in honor of her grandmother.

Her mother technically owned the other cottage her grandmother had and while her mom really wanted to sell it, she insisted she would take care of it while she was here and tend to any renters.

Which is why her mother texted her at least once a week about the renter at the cottage just three houses down the road. Our renter said there’s only one towel. Any ideas?

She gasped wondering how it slipped her mind to take the towels out of the dryer and fold them neatly into the bathroom linen closet. On it. She responded and practically ran down the road. She knocked on the door to her second home away from home and waited for the person on the other side to answer. While waiting she noticed the little sign below the main window was crooked—fell off the hook again in the ocean wind. She needed to remember to bring a pair of pliers back to close the loop the next time she came over.

The two cottages were almost identical. Except this door was a sea blue and hers was a sea green. They were little wooden cottages, shingled top to bottom. Just two windows at the front of the house, two on the back, and one on each side. There were two skylights in the roof allowing for lots of natural light. Each home had two small bedrooms, a bathroom, a spacious sitting area and full kitchen. They were wall to wall hardwood floors even though her Grandma in the 70s tried very hard to convince everyone it needed carpeting. But try vacuuming sand out of a beach cottage all the time. Due to space behind the home, hers had a little patio but this one was fitted with a little patio and an outdoor shower.

The blue door opened while she was still putting the wood block that read Sea View back in it’s place. “Uh...hello?” He asked. She turned to find Harry, surprise all across his face, to see the girl he met earlier outside his rental.

Of course it was Harry. “Oh, how funny!” She chirped excited to see the gorgeous man from the beach once more—her plan right now was to not-so-casually run into him at the beach again the next day. “I should have asked where you were renting!”

He smirked. “Hi love,” he said sweetly, confused that she was here. “Uh...what are you doing here?”

“My family owns this cottage,” she explained. “Mom texted me that you don’t have towels? That’s my fault. Left them in the dryer when I was cleaning on turnover day. I’ll fold them now,” she said and marched herself inside and maneuvered through the familiar room with ease.

“Oh,” Harry said. “S’okay, love. I didn’t mean t’bother you—I would have found them eventually—”

“Absolutely not, it’s your vacation! You deserve clean towels and not have to worry about looking for things,” she was already piling the fluffy array of sea blue and green towels out of the dryer and began folding them expertly. “I’m going to leave you my number so if you need anything you can just ask me. I always tell her to just give them my number, but she worries about weirdos taking advantage of me,” she rolled her eyes.

What would possess me to say that to Harry?

He smiled as he watched her flurry of activity. Her rambling little monologue. She was definitely scaring him. It occurred to her at that moment she didn’t even wait to be invited into his space. Just strode right in. “Glad m’not a weirdo. I agree with y’mum. Think I would like her,” he nodded firmly.

She felt her face warm, and she hoped the tan hid the blush as much as possible. Harry’s nose and cheeks looked a bit red—like he caught a bit of a cold. The rest of his body was covered by a simple pair of jogging shorts and a simple t-shirt so she couldn’t see if he burned and also didn’t want to be caught staring at him—especially thinking about the abs he had on display under the litany of tattoos she saw earlier at the beach. “Well, I will fold these and get out of your hair,” she said focusing on the towels. But her brain glitched out once more. “Oh, do you like surfing?” She asked.

He chuckled leaning against the frame of the door leading to this utility room. “Only been once with a group of m’friends. S’not m’cup of tea. M’not very good.”

“Oh, okay. I just want to make sure I recommend everything you might like.”

He was smirking at her like she was a bit crazy—and she was—but Harry wasn’t helping. Without sunglasses she saw he had green eyes. Green. She was done before this even started. Once all the towels were folded, she made herself at home once more, hurrying to the bathroom to put all the towels in place. The bathroom smelled like men’s cologne: sandalwood and sage. Jesus Christ it’s like he was built in a lab for me.

Harry followed her as she put the towels away in an alternating pattern. “Thank you,” he said. “Y’really didn’t need t’do all that.”

“You’re the guest. You paid to get this kind of service,” she reminded him. “I’m also...only three houses down if you need something as well. It’s got a sign like yours below the window Sun-Kissed Cabana. My grandma named them.”

He nodded and stared at her for a few moments. She had only known Harry for all of five hours, but she could swear she knew his thoughts. He probably did think she was a bit crazy. “Do...do y’have plans for dinner?”

She felt her heart flutter. She was going to order her favorite pesto pasta dish from a local place that practically recognized her voice when she called. “Uh...no.”

“Would y’like t’go out with me in ‘bout an hour?” He asked.

She nodded eagerly. “Yes, please.”

*

She was finishing up her makeup when her phone vibrated with a second message from Harry. The first one was to alert her who was messaging Hiii, it’s Harry Xx. Followed by: Does this place have a fancy dress code?

No, no. Nothing fancy at all! They’ve def got a beach bar vibe.

Cool :) I’m ready when you are.

Shit. She wanted to curl her hair a bit and look extra nice but maybe that would have looked like she was trying too hard after she just got through telling him it wasn’t a fancy place. She had on a maxi dress. Black top nothing revealing and then the skirt pattern had sunflowers all over it. She would have to forgo the curls and instead pushed the front of her hair back with a headband. Just need like five more minutes.

I’m in no rush, love. Please take your time Xx.

She thought she was going to melt. Fortunately, her tanned skin hid most of the imperfections of her face. She also preferred maxi dresses because it hid the thickness of her thighs and more imperfections like bumps from shaving and bruises from whacking herself on her beach chair. She thought the style she chose also perfectly accentuated the curve of her waist. While it didn’t show off her cleavage—it was her personal belief her boobs were one of her better assets—she thought after a day at the beach with them on full display due to her bathing suit, dinner might be a little gentler without them in Harry’s face the whole time.

With a spritz of her perfume and gathering all her necessary belongings into her purse, slid on her favorite pair of sandals with gold brushed embellishments, and headed outside. There wasn’t really a discussion of how they would get there, but she decided to walk down the road back to Sea View. Harry was crouched by the sign, pliers in hand closing the very loop she said she would. “Oh, I’m sorry. You didn’t have to do that,” she said hurriedly feeling like a terrible hostess.

He turned and smiled at her. “No worries, love. S’easy. Jus’ found some pliers in the utility closet.”

“Well, thank you,” she murmured gratefully. Harry stood, putting the pliers just inside the doorway before locking it with the passcode. He turned to her.

“Is this place walking distance, or should I drive us?” He asked. His hair was fluffed in these beautiful chocolate waves that of course reminded her of the beach but made her want to bury her hands in it and kiss his perfect face until she was out of breath.

“Uh,” she didn’t think she wanted to walk in a dress, but maybe that was the experience of this vacation for him. Harry looked utterly comfortable but perfect (naturally) in a pair of navy-blue khaki shorts and grey short sleeve button down. The lack of sleeves showed off those tattoos that she was continuously falling for. On his feet he wore a pair of light grey sneakers. “We can walk, but it might take me a while in a dress and sandals.”

“Oh shit, of course. What m’I saying? Y’can’t walk in a pretty dress like that,” he said hurrying to the car and opening the passenger side. “After you, love. Jus’ need t’tell me the directions,” he smiled at her.

All the books she had brought to her summer vacation had a romantic flare to them. Her only thought was there should be a book written about this very day—meeting Harry at the beach and going on a date with him. It was impractical and a bit flighty of her to be so taken with him already.

But there was no way she could help it when he got in the driver’s seat, smiled at her with those dreamy dimples and his eyes twinkled at her behind those pretty lashes of his. “Y’look gorgeous, love.”

*

It was effortless how much he enjoyed her company. The idea that it was only his first full day and he had already had a good beach day and another good jog under his belt. The post-beach-and-jog shower was cold-watered but steamy as he thought of the pretty girl in her pretty bathing suit. He imagined her smile, the gentle curve of her lips as he wrapped his hand around his cock as the water cooled off his sweaty and warm skin for several minutes until he was finally relieved of seeing her...assets at the beach.

Seeing her immediately after he inquired about the lack of towels as soon as he had shorts on was like a dream. Her agreeing to dinner with a beautiful girl was not what he expected when he booked this trip six months ago. Only one day in and this was the best vacation he had ever been on.

They arrived at the restaurant and after searching through the menu in silence, they placed drinks and an appetizer to share.

Did he mention how effortless this all was? The conversation was once more not a moment of dullness. She was funny, beautiful, kind, and it seemed that everyone at the restaurant knew her at least a little bit. “Our sun-kissed angel is here!” A man shouted from across the patio where they were seated. Everyone turned to follow the gaze of the man and Harry smirked instead of being jealous because he was right. She was an angel. A tanned, lovely, gorgeous angel.

She rolled her eyes. “Harry, this is my friend Louis. I used to work here in the summer.”

“Before she went off an got a real job, like a traitor.”

Harry was fascinated by her, simply put. He wanted to spend forever at dinner with her. Chatting with her. Looking at her beautiful face. Envying how the sun got to kiss her, and he didn’t.

*

“Okay, well...we can’t not get ice cream,” she said knowingly.

“You just told the waiter you were too full for dessert,” he chuckled at her.

“You don’t get dessert at a restaurant when there are literally seven different ice cream shops within spitting distance,” she rolled her eyes. “Summer is for ice cream. If we hurry, we can see a sunset too.”

“Y’sure know how t’get the most out of a summer day.”

She frowned. “Oh...I’m sorry. I forget that you only have two weeks. We don’t have to. We can head back,” she said softly. “I’m sorry.”

“No, not at all, love. S’a great idea,” he reached out across the console and rested his hand on her thigh near her knee. With the long dress covering her legs, it wasn’t terribly inappropriate, but it was so instinctive to reach out and touch her he felt he made a mistake when she was suddenly speechless. Unable to tell Harry where to go to get her precious ice cream. “Er...sorry,” he said pulling his hand back to rest on the gearshift between them. “Should have asked,” he felt his face warm in embarrassment.

“N-no, it’s okay,” she nodded quickly. Her voice was breathy as she stammered. “I was...” She shook her head. “You can touch me—I mean,” she put a hand over her face in embarrassment at the encouragement she just gave him. Harry decided to quickly put her out of her misery—he did say tits after looking at her for thirty seconds this morning, even if she didn’t hear it. He gave her leg a gentle squeeze as he moved his hand back to where it was. She was silent again once more and she rested one hand over his. Letting a few of her fingers fill the space between his but not twining them fully together. “Is this okay?” She asked softly.

Harry melted over her sweetness. “Perfect.”

*

They ate their ice cream on the beach sitting on the tall, white lifeguard stand since it was late. There was a smattering of running kids, a few dogs, and families littered closer to the water on the tidal flats. But no one was over where they were. Up on the soft sand encroaching on the dunes. They chatted in between licks and bites of ice cream and Harry was certain he was falling deeper and deeper in love with her by the millisecond. It was ridiculous. Love at first sight couldn’t possibly be real. He had three or four serious girlfriends (four if you counted his junior high love affair, three if you didn’t) all of whom he did fall in love with but over the course of weeks and months. Not minutes and hours. Maybe it was the salt air playing with his brain chemistry.

Certainly, it had something to do with the beautiful girl sitting so close to him he could feel her sun-kissed skin warming him from the gentle breeze floating off the water as the sun started its descent over the horizon. She took her phone from her purse and snapped a picture quickly. Hardly looked at it, barely centered it, yet it was the most beautiful sunset picture he’d ever seen.

“Are y’a photographer in y’free time?” He asked.

She snorted. “No, I do like taking pictures. But I have hundreds of these,” she said showing him the photo album of various sunset pictures she had taken over the years. Harry could see why she was so good at them. No two pictures looked alike which had to be a poem somewhere out there. Harry always considered himself a winter—growing up in cold England would do that to a person—and no two snowflakes were alike. Snowflakes had nothing on her sunsets.

“D’you want t’take a picture together?” He asked quietly.

She smirked. “Do I have chocolate on my face?” She wrinkled her nose at him.

Chuckling, he shook his head. “No,” he promised. Harry wrapped an arm around her waist pulling her snuggly against him. “S’this okay?” he asked almost directly into her ear. She nodded and smiled as she flipped her camera around to selfie mode. Harry had one arm around her waist, the other holding his ice cream cone. She reached her arm out to take the picture while she held her cup of ice cream in her lap with the other. Gazing at her screen, Harry couldn’t believe how effortless it felt to touch her. It was so easy to talk to her. And they looked like the perfect beach couple. “Can y’send that to me?” He murmured in her ear once more. She nodded mutely. Harry didn’t remove his arm from around her waist and he continued eating his ice cream.

Once finished with their treat, they continued chatting and watching the sunset listening to the laughter of families on the beach. The sky was so pretty Harry thought that she was right. This was the best place on earth.

*

They walked back to their cottages hand in hand, Harry stopping outside the door for the place labeled Sun-Kissed Cabana. “S’that why Louis calls you a sun-kissed angel?”

She rolled her eyes. “He’s something else.”

Harry chuckled. Leaned forward and swept his lips on the apple of her cheek. “I had the perfect first day with you, love,” he said softly. “Sleep well,” he hummed and turned to walk three houses down. She pressed a hand on her cheek like a lovesick idiot. She nearly forgot the code to get into her own house and felt like floating all the way to her room where she giggled and kicked across her bed as she smiled into her pillow.

*

The next three days were spent almost the same as the first. The beach: complete with reading, naps, and lots of talking to the pretty girl he liked so much already. Followed by a run, a shower, and then dinner. Harry tried really hard not to touch her without asking. The only allowance he gave himself to touch her without asking was when he truly felt like her back was getting a little singed. On the second day she made the grilled chicken salad she told Harry she was going to make before he invited her to dinner, but once he informed her he was a pescetarian she hurried to the store to get him some fish to grill instead. It was totally unnecessary, and Harry felt guilty she spent money on him like that for dinner (even though he was insistent he pay for dinner and ice cream the first night). Regardless, it was a delicious salad paired with zucchini noodles that truly tasted just like pasta. Harry made her write the recipe down for him.

“I can’t run at all,” she wrinkled her nose when Harry offered to join her on her evening walk the following day.

“I’d rather walk with y’then, love,” he said softly with a smile. “If y’want company, that is.”

She wanted to say she wanted Harry’s company. But thought that was a bit too much. But they walked side by side, Harry gently ushering her to the inside of the road without making any fuss about it. They continued their comfortable chattering. Talking of anything and everything. That night they ordered pizza that was delivered to Sea View and watched a movie in his living room, her feet in his lap where he rubbed the soles of her aching feet without prompting or full acknowledgement.

By the end of the third day, she thought Harry might be her best friend. He made crispy cauliflower tacos. He spent the evening simply reading on her back porch with her in comfortable, perfect silence.

*

The fourth day, they were sitting on her back porch again, sipping bubbly wine spritzers that she put in glasses of ice and combined with a popsicle to match the flavors. Harry thought it was sinful the way she licked the pop. Harry wanted to jump her bones so very badly.

“How do you like the outdoor shower?” She asked looking up at the sky full of stars. There was a citronella candle between them to keep the bugs away and she had a solar set of lights strung about her little patio. She was in a soft warm glow from the lights. Once more, looking sun kissed. She was wearing a shorter dress than the other day, shorts beneath it. She informed him about the shorts because she said it was an athletic-type dress and she may have sat weird and didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

Harry thought there wasn’t anything she could do to make him uncomfortable.

“I haven’t used it, actually. M’not sure I—”

She made an almost inhuman noise, a cross between a growl and gasp. It was quite adorable even if she seemed miffed and Harry wished he could have recorded the sound because he thought he would listen to it on loop for the rest of forever. “Harry!” She almost shouted. “The sole reason I took Sun-Kissed Cabana over Sea View was because I knew the outdoor shower would be a huge selling point for renters. You haven’t used it?” She looked nearly betrayed.

He chuckled, sipping his drink. “M’sorry, love. I didn’t realize—”

“Harry, I’m not kidding. You have to go use it. Like right now.”

He laughed loudly. If there could possibly be a downside of this little beach-cottage neighborhood, it would be that the houses were quite close, and Harry’s loud laughter could probably be heard back at his own place. But she was staring at him seriously. He thought she really expected him to get up and leave at this moment so he could get this experience.

“Y’serious?” He asked smirking at her.

“I don’t joke about the outdoor shower,” she promised him.

Finishing his popsicle and taking the last sips of his drink he stood from her little patio table and shook his head with a chuckle at her. “I guess m’going.”

He wanted to invite her. Especially if she didn’t have one here at Cabana. It sounded like she would like it more. “You better,” she continued licking the pop and Harry was grateful he would at least have a new image to think about in the outdoor shower when he imagined his hand around his dick was her mouth instead.

*

The air was cool but somehow warm. Sort of like the water on his skin. He could see the draw and actually surprised himself that he hadn’t used the shower yet. He imagined in the morning it would be heaven—most of his showers had been in the afternoon or evening since he was running at that time. But maybe he could take two showers a day—who cared? He was on vacation.

Was it heavenly? Her message read.

Harry thought about how much how active his imagination got picturing her in that shower with him, his hand fisting over himself until he imagined her pretty cleavage covered in him instead of flowing with the water down the drain. Extremely. But of course, he left out why it was so heavenly. You should write a book of recommendations for your guests.

:) You can come back over if you want. I know I kind of kicked you out, but like I said. I’m very serious about outdoor showers.

Chuckling to himself, he hurried to get dressed again and meet her back there.

*

She knew Harry’s family was coming today so she told him that she would give him all kinds of space but if he needed anything, he was not to hesitate to ask her. “M’mum and sister would love t’meet you, kitten,” he promised. He didn’t mean to call her kitten. But it rolled off the tongue so effortlessly and she was the one who said she felt like a cat in the sun. But he didn’t spend long thinking about it and continued his little speech. “Y’don’t have t’evade us.”

“I’m sure you want family time,” she promised. “Really, it’s fine. Plus, we’ll have a whole other week to do our little routine,” she felt her face warm as she spoke realizing she just told Harry she wanted to spend the remainder of his vacation together. She opened her mouth to backtrack almost instantly, but Harry beat her to the punch before she could speak again.

Given that Harry was this close to telling her he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, another full week spent together seemed like a great idea. “I can’t wait,” he promised.

They decided to do a sunrise that morning. She brought a blanket and was wrapped up in a long sleeve shirt along with a pair of sweatpants. She advised Harry to do the same. “The air is still cool from the night when you get to the beach early,” she explained the night before they parted to go to bed.

They were laying on the blanket angled by the natural slope of the dunes so they could see the view of the sun cresting on the ocean horizon. “Do y’have as many sunrise pictures?” He asked tiredly. With the sun rising at just after five-thirty she was courteous and kind in asking that they get there at five so they could see the dawn and array of beautiful colors painting the sky before the sun got there.

She giggled. “No way. Too early to see it that many times. I do like sunrises more, though,” she said. “It’s so much quieter. It’s not as hot. I don’t know. I think sunrises are just so beautiful.”

He immediately, silently agreed with her that they were. No matter how much he was enjoying sunsets with her. He would wake up at 4:45 every day if it meant watching something she found beautiful, and it made her happy. Harry had her pulled to his side again, his arm looped beneath the back of her neck. His eyes were closed as he fiddled with a strand of her hair running his fingers through the soft tendrils. “Harry,” she whispered after a few minutes. Harry felt the edges of sleep and the dreamworld starting to meld together on his brain. “You’re gonna miss it,” her voice was so gentle. Perfect for morning. She was the most beautiful thing he had laid eyes on but he couldn't bring himself to open them right now.

“Hmm,” he hummed. Refusing to open his eyes. “S’okay. We can see it another day,” he mumbled.

She giggled. “Harry,” she whispered so gently. It felt like magic. Warmth spread through his whole body. “We woke up so early,” she reminded him.

He nodded. “M’sorry,” he sighed. “It’s so peaceful,” he muttered. “You’re warm,” he turned his face to bury his nose in her hair and he nuzzled closer to her. Harry being a cuddler didn’t surprise her. He was quite touchy. But this sent her heart into a frenzy, and she forgot why they were there.

“Harry,” she whispered again feeling brave. Maybe because it was too early, and her brain wasn’t functioning.

“Jus’ lemme sleep, kitten. Please?” He muttered into her hair. “Wake me in twenty-nine minutes.”

She swallowed. “But...I want to kiss you,” she sounded so shy.

Harry’s eyes sprung open, and he pulled back from her quickly to look at her beautiful, perfect face. “M’awake,” he promised and gently cupped her cheeks, his fingers slipping through her hair, and he brought her face closer to his. Kissing her like he had been dreaming about over the last five days was the only thing on his mind.

She moaned against his mouth and Harry was really looking forward to that outdoor shower now. She pressed against him, keening as she licked into his mouth, sucking on his lower lip. Driving him absolutely mad as she nipped at his lip gently with her teeth. She could feel herself squeezing her thighs together for relief because she was finally kissing Harry the way she wished she did at sunset on his first night here.

Harry’s hands were cool against her flushed cheeks. “Kitten,” he hummed against her mouth, pecking at her like he would die without her kisses. “Y’taste so good,” he sighed dreamily.

She rolled to her side to face him squarely while he returned to his side too, instead of hovering over her. He wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her against him. Over the past four days at the beach, she had tried really hard not to stare at whatever was going on in Harry’s swimsuit, so she didn’t look like a sex-maniac. But there was no way she could ignore the hard dick she felt against her thigh as she pressed against the full length of his body. She imagined Harry fucking her so hard in that outdoor shower that the neighbors would have no way of ignoring what was happening. She moaned at the idea once more against his lips, thighs pressing together.

“Oh no,” he hummed. If she wasn’t already so drunk in love with Harry after one date and four days together, she might have thought his voice sounded a bit mocking. Slowly, he rolled onto his back holding onto her and perching her body on top of him as he did. One of his legs separated her thighs apart. “Do y’need something from me, love?” He cooed almost lovingly at the idea she was aching between her legs. He kept her pulled down toward him so he could continue kissing her, effectively melting all coherent thought.

Holy shit, his voice. Oh my God.

Without meaning to, she clenched her legs once more, this time, wrapped around Harry’s thigh causing friction, despite two layers of sweatpants and her underwear (at least those were thin). “N-no,” she almost whimpered trying to get away from his leg. Harry put his hands on her hips and gently pressed her back down toward him while bending his knee a bit. His thigh came closer in contact with her so if she wanted to, she could rub right against him.

“Y’sure, love? You look like y’might need something,” his voice was so sultry. It was too early for this. His eyes were somehow a deeper green. His lips were too pink after kissing her.

“N-no,” she shook her head despite wanting nothing more than to grind her pelvis against his thigh. She knew what it looked like beneath the sweatpants. She knew the tattoos that dotted his skin. Fuck, she wanted to get herself off so bad. But she was acutely aware of her position and tried to lift herself off his leg. “I-I think m’too heavy,” she stammered again.

He groaned and pulled her tighter against his leg. “No way, angel,” he promised. “Go ahead, know y’want to. I want y’to,” his voice was a bit husky. Like he was a bit confused. She groaned softly. God she wanted to. “That’s it,” he encouraged as she ground herself against him.

She felt flush, wishing she wasn’t wearing sweatpants. They were getting in the way. The long sleeve shirt was making her warmer. Or maybe it was Harry that was making her warm. Harry helped shift her hips back and forth against his leg as she moaned and whimpered as she rutted against his thigh. “Y’look so pretty, kitten,” he cooed. “Getting off on m’thigh like that. S’making me so hard, love. Fuck,” he moaned. “You’re s’pretty.”

She continued creating friction on between the two of them worried she would give herself a burn from all the fabric rubbing together but she was so fucking wet she was certain she would slide easily against him if she could take her pants off in public. The sun was still rising, not quite up over the horizon yet, but the sky was brighter, creating a gorgeous image of her beautiful body silhouetted from the light. “S’good, so good, baby,” he groaned. She whined and continued rutting herself against him.

“Harry,” she croaked.

“Yeah, love? Y’gonna come for me? Gonna come from jus’ m’thigh?”

Jesus Christ, she felt like she was a virgin. She was almost certain she was. Had she ever even had an orgasm before Harry? When was the last time she had sex? When was the last time she masturbated? Holy shit. This was bad. He was all consuming and he was fully clothed, and it was just his thigh.

She nodded at his words. Even though she felt a bit silly and stupid for doing this, with two layers of sweatpants between them. “Yeah? Good, want y’to. Y’look so pretty all—”

“Fucking hell,” she whimpered and dropped her face to his chest as she twitched against him. Harry flexed his muscle, gripping her hips and rubbing her against him so he could help her ride out the waves of her orgasm for a few moments. After that, Harry dropped his knee once more, letting her flatten against him. He kissed her forehead as she breathed heavily against him, shaky and sighing as she let the euphoria course through her. He rubbed up and down her back as she did, and he breathed deeply into her hair. She smelled like sunscreen and coconut.

“I really like sunrises,” he murmured. She smirked. Her face against his chest. “Y’sleepy, now, kitten?”

She nodded. “Yeah,” her voice was a bit quiet. Almost unsure. “Sorry,” she mumbled, nuzzling her face against his shirt.

He shook his head, kissing the top of her hair once more. “Don’t be sorry. Been thinking ‘bout y’coming all over me since I met you.”

She giggled. “Yeah?”

Maybe he shouldn’t have said that. It wasn’t very...flattering on his part. It also made it sound like he only liked her for the idea of sex. Which wasn’t the case. He liked her so much simply because she was the sweetest, nicest person he had had the pleasure of meeting for a really long time.

She rolled off him. He kind of hated it because even though it wasn’t freezing cold, it felt like it now that she wasn’t laying on his body. She looked at the outline of the bulge stretching against his gray sweatpants. It was still ten minutes until the sun would be touching the horizon. “Fair’s fair, yeah?” She wondered, looking up at him and then back down at the somehow growing outline. She would be lucky if he fit in her mouth.

“Angel, y’don’t have to jus’ because—”

She frowned. “Do...you not want me to?” She wondered, confused and worried that he was rejecting her. She didn’t know why if he had just used her thigh to get him off.

“No, no,” he said quickly wanting to ease the worry he saw fill her beautiful face. God he would rather die than reject her. “I mean...y’can do whatever y’want to m’body,” he nodded eagerly. “Jus’ don’t want you t’think you have to. Been thinking ‘bout—” his voice choked off as she outlined the bulge. “Oh...s’nice,” he moaned forgetting everything he was saying about what she could do to him. Her fingertip simply ran along absent-minded paths along his length. He struggled to remember the last time he had sex because he could only imagine the episode in the outdoor shower as the last time he orgasmed.

She giggled. “Nice?” She questioned; Harry was so polite. The way he walked with her on the inside of the road, the way he held her door open no matter if they were going in the house or the car, or if he simply carried her heavy cooler off the beach even though he was carrying his own belongings. For him to say it was nice the way she was touching his dick was simply...something else.

He nodded breathlessly. “Yeah,” he was already too far gone with just her goddamn finger touching him. He couldn’t have made any comment further if he wanted to. He moaned as she squeezed gently along the length of him. Five minutes till sunrise and the beach would be covered in light. She glanced around quickly, seeing they were still alone. She had never done this in the five years she had been staying the summer back in town keeping an eye on Sea View while living in Sun-Kissed Cabana.

“Do you think I could make you come in five minutes?” She whispered.

He groaned almost animalistically. “Love, I think y’could make me come in forty-five seconds,” he promised. And with that, she dipped her head toward his waist just until the sun was ready to cross over the horizon.

*

It was quite difficult not to text Harry all day long while his family visited. It was entirely due to having an orgasm at his hand (thigh); the creeping need to bond to the person who just made her entire world flip upside down was a prominent feeling throughout her body the whole day. The words of her book didn’t make any sense, so she opted for cleaning her bathroom. But that proved to be difficult too, and she spilled most of the mop water back onto the floor. After another fit of cleaning that up, she decided to spend her time at the grocery store since she was getting dangerously low on her much-needed items. She nearly forgot to go to the checkout line. After putting everything away she thought about just going to bed at three in the afternoon just to rid her mind of how crazy she was being and how awkwardly she missed her summer guy.

Fortunately, Harry broke first, before she fell asleep.

I know it’s silly, but I miss you terribly.

She felt so much relief reading his message. Oh, thank God. Me too.

You really should just come over. Mum and Gemma want to meet you. I won’t shut up about you. It’s...a bit pathetic how obsessed I sound actually. Mum’s in the outdoor shower while Gemma is taking pictures of the beach. We’re going to have dinner in a bit—you should join us. He put this shy little emoji after his message.

She was currently dressed in a pair of bike shorts and t-shirt that fell past her hips, barely a strip of the shorts showed. She had her hair pulled back by a claw clip. She wanted to go over there immediately. However, her outfit and hair did not look ready to meet Harry’s family. Plus, she was worried she would do something stupid like sit in Harry’s lap in front of his mother and sister and then she would have to jump out a window to hide her infatuation.

I would love to, but really...I’m sure they want to see you.

They want to ‘meet the girl that’s got me all flustered’ that I nearly dropped all our snack bar food in the sand today :)

She giggled. Glad he was also affected by their sunrise romp in the sand. Maybe tomorrow? She hedged instead. She really didn’t want to intrude.

Please, love. That would be wonderful.

*

She must have fallen asleep anyway. But she woke up to a knock at her door. She felt the claw clip sliding out of the back of her hair and she rubbed her eye as she made her way over. There stood Harry and two women outside the screen door. Each of them was holding a dish of (presumably) food. Immediately, she felt underdressed and stupid looking. “Uh, hey beautiful,” he smiled gently. “Sorry t’bother you. But seems the barbeque back there is out of gas,” he explained. “I sent y’a text—”

“Harry, the poor girl was sleeping,” his mother admonished. “I told you we could just go out to eat. Love, m’so sorry. I swear some days he was raised in a barn!” She shook her head. “We’ll leave you be.”

“No, no,” she shook her head quickly, the clip clattering from the ends of her hair to the floor. She felt her face warm, once more grateful for the tan skin to hide most of the blush rushing to her cheeks. She opened the door for them to enter and quickly swept the clip into her hands. “Make yourselves at home,” she said, and Harry ushered his mother toward the kitchen and out the back door toward the patio and grill. Gemma walked slower behind her family to give some reassurance to the girl who was struggling to fix her hair in the little entry way mirror.

“M’sorry about both of them in advance,” Gemma whispered. “Harry hasn’t been able to function normally all day and Mum is already in love with you. When you didn’t answer, it was the first coherent thought Mum had about not begging to see you and thus began Harry pacing waiting all of four minutes for your response before he said we could just come over like absolute lunatics.”

Oh God she liked Gemma. “Thank you. I’m so sorry I look like this,” she winced at the image of her reflection. She was all frizz and pillow lines from the couch where she fell asleep.

She snorted. “Please, we interrupted your evening. Your quiet time and relaxation. Don’t worry about it. You look beautiful,” she promised pressing a hand on her arm and headed after her brother and mother.

If she wasn't already--which she was pretty sure she was--Harry’s lovely little family was going to ensure she fell so hopelessly and terribly in love with Harry.

--

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[chemococktailonthehouse]

Nightly Ritual (Lucifer x F!Reader)

Description: Lucifer tended to stay up far later than he should, and he certainly wasn't easy to convince to come to bed. You, however, had a few tricks up your sleeve.

Warnings: Fluff (that's it. that's the whole post), sleepy sleepy reader, no use of Y/N, no beta we die like men

Author's Note: This one has been sitting in my drafts for a hot minute now. I've got another one I'm working on and may not finish that has similar vibes with a touch of angst (what can I say, I know what I like). I'm not sure how much Hazbin I'll write for, as I'm not super involved with the fandom at this point. Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Word Count: 897

This has been cross-posted on my AO3 account which you can find here.

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Lucifer spent many a night in his workshop working and you spent many a night trying to pull him away from said work and into bed. Besides, what was the point of a king-sized bed if there wasn’t a king to share it with? At some point you realized that if you could get him to enter the bedroom the battle was practically won. But how could you consistently make that happen? The answer fell into your lap one night when you dozed off watching him work. He gazed at you fondly for a moment before finally scooping you up and carrying you off to bed. As soon as he deposited you beneath the sheets you pulled him along with you as he let out a surprised umph. And so this dance of yours began. You would fall asleep in his office and he would carry you to bed. It didn’t take him long for him to catch on to your little game, but he couldn’t help but play along.

Most nights you’d pull up a chair to his desk, your head moving from resting in your palm to laying across your arm as you began to drift off. Other time’s you’d sit next to him, resting your head on his shoulder as he tinkered away. Once or twice you even sat in his lap with your head buried in the crook of his neck as he hummed softly in your ear. Tonight though, you unintentionally mixed things up.

Luci heard the door creak open not too long after supper as you padded into the room. He was a bit surprised. Usually you wouldn’t start this song and dance until much later in the evening. You wrapped your arms around him and rested your head on his shoulder as you peered at his current project. Maybe you were just here to watch tonight.

“Whatcha working on?” Though, to be honest, you already knew the answer.

“Oh, just the usual.”

You fell into a comfortable silence. Every now and again you’d ask a question about what he was doing or what tool he was using, to which he would happily answer. After one particularly in depth question he turned to you, “so, you trying to pick up the tools of the trade?”

“How do you know I’m not already an expert?”

“Oh ho ho, I think we both remember what happened last time.”

You swatted at his shoulder playfully, “oh hush you.”

“I’m not the one who almost set the office ablaze,” he raised his eyebrows as he challenged you to retort.

”Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. You should be thankful I took such a tremendous responsibility off your hands.”

“Mhmm,” you could feel his quiet laughter reverberate in his chest. He continued working, humming contently whenever you’d pepper kisses on his cheek. Eventually the frequency of your musings began to slow as he noted your breathing deepening, “you sure you don’t want to come sit in my lap?” While he didn’t want you toppling over, he was reveling in the close contact and would be damned if it ended any time soon.

“Can see what you’re doing better from up here,” the way you mumbled made it evident that sleep was soon to follow.

“You sure you’re not gonna fall asleep back there?”

“Mhmm. ‘m not even that tired.”

He turned and placed a kiss on your cheek, “whatever you say, dear.”

You did, in fact, fall asleep back there. Just as the first soft snore left your lips he felt you begin to slide to the side. He unfurled his wings, keeping you upright until he could turn around and lift you into his arms, “alright missy, let’s get you to bed.” You stirred slightly, lazily reaching an arm over his shoulder to stroke the feathers at the base of his wings as he carried you down the hall. The only clue that he had finally made it to the room was the soft click of the door before he laid you down on the bed. Before you had the chance to pull him down with you he had stepped out of your grasp. You turned to face him, worried that your plan had been unsuccessful this evening, “stay, please.”

“I’ll be right there, just need to slip into something more comfortable.” A few minutes later he climbed under the covers and pulled you to him, the warmth of bare chest pulling you in like a duckling to its mother.

You looped an arm around him once more, tracing your fingers across his back in search of those oh-so-soft wings. You huffed, disappointed to find he had tucked them away, “Luci?”

“Yes dear?”

You rubbed small circles until he finally got the hint. “Ohhh, someone sure is needy tonight, hmm?” His tone was playful, though it could be argued that he found much more satisfaction from wrapping you up in his wings than you did. And you loved when he wrapped you up. You began combing your fingers through his feathers again as he practically purred, “you know if you keep that up I may just have to start coming to bed earlier.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” there was that mumbling again as you began to drift off.

He chuckled, a soft, deep tone, “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

[seohwang]

XXXX.

First kisses with Ateez - Jongho ver.

Genre: fluff

Word count: 755

Warnings: none, Jongho is just too smooth for his own good, that's all

A/N: While working on my other bigger projects, I've decided to post another member's part of my First kisses with Ateez reaction series!! This time, the member of choice is Jongho, as I've been especially focused on him lately. Hope you enjoy and see you again soon! ♥

A/N 2: Btw, this is part of a small event I did on both this blog and my other, more nsfw one, @kp-alice! Go check it out if you're interested in some fun sub!yeosang smut ♥

Now, I think Jongho is a simple man

Not in a bad way, of course not!!

He just likes to take things at a slow, comfortable pace, especially when it comes to relationships

So he would definitely be one of the less nervous members when it came to your first kiss

He wouldn’t worry about it much, deciding that he’d stress about it when it actually happened

And in the meantime, he'd want to get to know you as much as possible, resulting in many relaxed, quiet dates where the two of you would get to hang out and talk, or even just vibe silently in the other’s presence

Whether it would be at a park, at home, or at some cute and cozy café - much like right now

You were just planning on taking a short walk around, wanting to enjoy the unexpectedly pleasant weather today

But then you saw this cool hand-made artisan shop, and this beautiful public art display, and-

Before you knew it, you strayed way off your original starting point, walking through unknown streets and exploring your new surroundings

Had it been just you walking around, you would have been a bit worried by now, pulling out your phone to try and find your way back

But with Jongho, you knew you had nothing to be concerned about

He just held your hand and pulled you along, a small smile never leaving his lips as he did so

And really, this did help you relax and allow yourself to roam freely

Until you noticed the sullen, grey sky looming above you, warning the two of you that the weather wouldn’t be staying nice for much longer

You told Jongho right away, making him reluctantly agree with you to call it a day just to be safe

But not even a few minutes later, rain started falling from the sky, growing in intensity with every street you passed

This alone would have been doable, but once the freezing wind picked up as well, you were starting to question your life decisions

Noticing your wet shirt, Jongho offered you his jacket to warm yourself up, but you quickly refused, not wanting him to get sick

But Jongho obviously didn’t want that for you either

And so, after a second failed attempt at convincing you to just take the jacket because he’d rather catch a cold himself than have you suffer, he thought of a different plan

Before you knew it, you were being pulled into the nearest café, a small bell chiming above your head as you entered

You tried to protest, but Jongho just gently shushed you, tugging you with him to a cozy table tucked in a far-away corner

There, he helped you get seated before taking off his jacket and sitting down next to you

“Jongho, we really don’t have to stay here, we’re not that far from-” “Of course we’re staying. I’m freezing cold and I was wearing more layers than you. No way I'm letting you out there before the rain stops,” he quickly retorted before reaching for the menu on the table

“But,” you tried again, nervously biting on your lip as you continued, “I didn’t even bring any money, I didn’t expect us to order anything today…”

You couldn’t help but feel embarrassed, silently scolding yourself for leaving your purse at home

The entire day was going great, but now you were going to ruin it with a small, stupid mistake

You wanted to apologize, to try and maybe save this situation somehow, but then…

???

Before you could say anything, you felt Jongho’s lips on yours, effectively shutting you up

Instinctively, you closed your eyes, resting a hand on his thigh for support as you leaned in for more

Shortly after, Jongho pulled away, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear

“And who said I’d let you pay?” He retorted with a smile, lowering his hand to cup your cheek, “I chose to bring us here so it’s my treat. All you need to do is warm yourself back up and stop worrying.”

And with that (and a light blush blooming on his face), he turned back to the menu, skimming the drinks to find something for the two of you while you still sat there, shocked

Needless to say, thanks to Jongho, you did feel a lot warmer already.

Thank you so much for reading! And remember, feedback is always appreciated!! <3

[tiny-pretty-sana]

taste of love | chaeyoung x reader

[request] paring: chaeyoung x reader genre: fluff and smut warnings: nsfw (+18), minors dni and not proofread tags: established relationship, top!chaeyoung, soft dom (kinda?), smutty intimacy, not plot just vibes w/c: 4.3k a/n: first time writing idol x reader and second time writing smut!! i love trying new things and i hope it's not too awkward. i also hope the lovely @nr1chaedickrider enjoys it and that the wait was worth it

It’s Friday night. You should be having dinner with your girlfriend at one of those small restaurants with cute decorations and dimmed lights that would become crowded and popular as soon as someone posted about them in social media, but for now are unknown and hidden enough for her to love them. She’s always been the best at finding these secret spots for your dates, like the one you were supposed to be having right now. You have actually been looking forward to it all week, but you had to cancel your plans after you left your boss's office this morning.

It doesn't matter that you've been working late all week on your assigned projects to get everything up to date because your boss needs a detailed presentation of last month’s sales first thing Monday morning. It doesn't matter how much work you've managed to get done ahead of schedule because you're young and that's the way things work. You're here to do your boss's job, be his secretary to then do your actual job . 

When you finally leave the building you see the dark sky and city lights, which means you’re leaving later than usual. You hadn't noticed, but your shoulders, back and neck are tense after the extra hours you've spent in front of the computer ignoring the stress, irritation and hunger you felt. But it's all done, you remember and try to forget about work until Monday.

You sigh and reach into your bag for your phone to call her. Before you can hear the second tone she picks it up but you don’t even give que time to answer. 

“Hey Chae I’m so sorry…” you start apologizing but she cuts you off and you hear her chuckle softly. 

"Baby stop, you've already apologized. I've already told you I'm not upset, I'm just worried because you're overworking yourself and I know you well enough to know that when  you do, you don’t eat properly, among other things. We can have dinner out tomorrow, now just come home, y/n." she says with that gentle tone that she uses when she knows you need some comfort even if her intention was to scold you for your unhealthy working habits. 

“Let me make it up for you. I’ll bring your favorite from that place you like near my work” you offer. 

"Don't worry about it, I've already made dinner. You've had a hard day, so let me take care of you. Come home safely, I'm waiting for you, okay?"  

You do as she says, but you can't help but make a quick stop by the convenience store to buy some strawberries after seeing that the flower shop had already closed. She says she's not upset with you, but you know that she was just as eager as you were to have your special night out.

On your way home, after hearing your girlfriend’s calming voice and knowing she is home waiting for you, you start feeling much better, still the tiredness and the tension of your muscles remains. 

There are some free seats in the subway but right now the last thing you want is going back to a sitting position, choosing to stand near the gates to jump off as soon as the train gets to your spot. The last thing you want to do is to delay even for a few seconds the moment you get home to her. You count the minutes left, the remaining stops and how many songs away you are from her. They are the same as always but at this particular moment it feels as if time is not passing as fast as you need to, making you get to your apartment building so fast you make it to the elevator almost breathless.

When you open the door, the first thing you notice is the strawberry scent from the candle you got her and then you see Chaeyoung. She’s there waiting for you with the biggest smile and her arms ready to wrap you. You stand in front of her and kiss the beauty mark under her lip before locking your mouths in a gentle kiss. After so long it has become a ritual like crossing your face when you get in church. It doesn’t feel like you’re home until you feel her lips against yours. 

Her arms are wrapped around your waist when she whispers “Are you okay?” against your skin before pulling away to look at you while she cups your face with one hand. 

“I’m good now” you say looking into those big dark eyes with sparks on them that resemble stars. “Just tired”. 

The next thing you notice when you come back to your senses after the long awaited kiss is the delicious smell of food cooked by your girlfriend, the table already set, candles everywhere and the ceiling lamp covered with a scarf. The dim light and the reddish shade give a touch of intimacy like those places you like to go to. Seeing how she has made the effort to set this while you were worried that you might have upset her by canceling your date makes you feel really lucky and full of love. From the corner of your eye you can see her smiling brightly. 

As expected, the dinner was delicious yet simple. Chaeyoung is not the most skilled cook but she makes the best dressings and sauces. Like any other night you tell each other about your day and make some plans for the weekend while you both eat the grilled salmon and the salad she has made, but being as hungry as you are you let her do most of the talking. Still you tell her about the awful day you had at work. She knows there is not much she can do besides support you and offer words of encouragement, but she makes sure to let you know so you don't forget that you can always count on her even when she doesn't quite understand what your job is all about sometimes. Sometimes even you don't quite know what you're doing.

After talking for a while with empty plates in front of you and a half-full glass of wine in your hand, it's time to clean up and you offer to wash the dishes. 

“Don’t worry about the dishes, you’ve done more than enough when I should’ve been the one making it up for our canceled date” you sigh, still somewhat disappointed. “Go take a shower”.

“Join me when you’re done” she winks at you teasingly. 

You have probably never cleaned the dishes this fast. 

Intending to join Chaeyoung in the shower, you slip in wearing just your underwear, but just as you did when you entered the house, you find the bathroom with the dim lighting of candles scattered around the place. The room is filled with the faint fragrance of jasmines, subtle, but it is enough to notice its comforting sweetness. An the bathtub has a layer of bubbles covering the surface of the water

She is on her knees at the foot of the tub lighting the last few pairs of candles wearing just her pants and her bra leaving her back tattoo on full display for you to admire. Being too focused with the candles she doesn’t realize you are there until you decide to make your presence known. 

“I should’ve known you’re up to something” you say, unable to hide your smile. 

Chaeyoung then turns around looking at you with those hooded eyes she gets when she drinks, they are not as sparkly as usual but the dozen flames that bathe the wall tiles are reflected in her eyes. Her eyes are the color of rich espresso, with a deep and captivating gaze that draws you in. You lock eyes with hers and it does not take you two much longer to get rid of the remaining clothes and get into the bathtub.

The water is hot and welcoming just like her embrace, she wraps your arms around you when you take the spot between her legs, resting your back against her front. And as soon as you rest your head on her shoulder you can feel the remnants of tension left in your body vanish as you let yourself be taken over by indulging in the delight of the senses. Chaeyoung's soft touch under the water, her velvety voice caressing your ear, the floral aroma is accompanied by the scent of strawberries, the remains of wine dancing in your tongue and the dim light of the candles bathing your skin. 

As her hands are too busy wandering around your body, you take care of feeding her and bring the glass of wine to her lips. In between you can't miss the opportunity to steal a kiss or two. 

The first few kisses are playful pecks you give her as you replace the strawberries with your own lips. Soon those stolen kisses are not enough for her and they gradually escalate into slow, sensual kisses that leave you both breathless. You lazily make out, exploring each other’s mouths like it is the first time, with the same tenderness, but with the confidence of someone who has done this a thousand times before. Now you know each other like the back of your hands. You know the pace that makes her go insane and she knows when is the right time to slide her tongue in your mouth to make you go dizzy.  

The taste of wine and strawberries makes you uncertain of where your mouth ends and hers begins until you follow her movements pushing your tongue between her lips and among the sweet and sour mixture you recognize a hint of Chaeyoung. It's something you cannot explain and you don't even know if it makes sense, but in the same way that she has her own distinct scent that you can distinguish beneath the perfume you are also able to recognize something that is inherently hers when you kiss, no matter if she has chewed gum, eaten chocolate or drank soju before. Not even when she uses a mint candy to mask the rare taste of cigarettes when she's stressed. It is that taste along with the gentle feeling of her tongue caressing the roof of your mouth that is making you feel more lightheaded than the actual alcohol you have been drinking since dinner. she just has this power over you. 

Kisses do not stop. You turn your body slightly to have better access to not just her mouth but her as a whole and tangle your hands in her hair in an attempt of pulling her impossibly closer when there aren't even clothes getting in the way between her smooth, tattooed skin and yours. It is at this moment when you become aware of a different wetness than the water between your legs, is the same wetness you’re also feeling against your ass, letting you know that your kisses have the same effect on Chae as hers do on you. Your move is followed by a soft moan as a result of the pressure you made against her center.

That sweet sound is accompanied by other sounds coming out of both her mouth and yours mixing with the sound of sloppy kisses that are getting deeper and more passionate. Her kisses are becoming hungrier every time and those same hands that once caressed you gently are now griping you with possession. Feeling her sinking her fingers in your skin feels as familiar as the sensation pooling in your lower stomach, like a prelude of what is to come. 

Her left hand moves up to your chest making you gasp against her lips at the sudden feeling of her cupping your breast. Your body reacts to the touch immediately as your nipples stiffen under her teasing thumb and your back slightly arches giving you a glimpse of her wetness one more time making her breath hitches and the kissing stops. 

Your mouths are no longer devouring each other’s but she keeps hers busy by tracing her tongue over your neck to end up nibbling your earlobe before you feel her slightly unsteady breathing just millimeters away from your ear.

“Stop doing that, this is about you” she tells you off. 

Chaeyoung’s warning gets followed by caresses that go up and down your thighs until she gets to your inner thigh squeezing it firmly and forcing you to keep your legs spread for her just for the sake of having you at her mercy since she has no intention of giving you what you crave yet. She wants you to know who is in control now, wants you to know she is going to take care of you and give you what you need. She is in charge and you are completely at her mercy.

It is not something unfamiliar. You both always enjoy a little power game, but that is not what you need now and she knows it. This control doesn’t come from a want of overpowering you but from devotion, she’s willing to take all the weight from your shoulder so you can let yourself go to allow the pleasure to take over you. She is here to provide not to take, you know it and that thought alone makes you feel dizzy and hot. 

Her hands are all over you, left hand wandering around your upper body while the other stays still in your thigh going up and down at a maddening peace. She cups your breasts and teases your nipples. At first she ghosts around them with her fingertips drawing figures on your skin, but as they get hard it gets too appealing not to go further by trapping them between her two fingers pinching them just enough to make your whines hit her ears. Throughout all this, her lips have not stopped placing wet kisses on your neck along with some biting and sucking in all the right spots. 

This is all it takes for her to have you all worked up and desperate for the touch you crave. You are pretty much aware of her touch as your own hands are top of her even when she is the one guiding the movements. You feel how she runs hers everywhere but between your legs where your neglected cunt starts pulsating in need.  

“Please Chae…” you start pleading but it gets caught in your throat as she moves up her hand to run a finger between your folds. 

“I know baby, I can feel it. You’re so wet and ready for me” she cooes without a hint of teasing in her voice, she is enjoying this as much as you. 

Her finger travels up and down between your folds, despite being underwater it moves with ease due to the slickness that has been dripping from your center since the kisses started to escalate. The hand you once had on top of the one she now has between your legs, is tangled in her hair guiding her mouth against yours to capture her lips in a hungry kiss. Those kisses are not enough to silence your moans once her ministrations reach your clit making circles that get progressively smaller tightening the knot that is forming in your lower stomach. 

She switches up the pace and her motions, taking you to the limit but not in a hurry, you are not in the mood for something quick. Today soft and slow is what you both want. It is intimate and passionate like whispering I love you between heated kisses. 

For a moment your mouths part and she pauses to admire the mess she is turning you into. You feel the warmth of your cheeks and the reddish hue tinting Chae's. You probably look like that too, with your hair sticking to your forehead more from sweat than water, with a blush on your cheeks that extends to your ears and your lips looking wet and puffy. 

The break lasts a few seconds, just long enough to remind you that there is a world beyond Chaeyoung's mouth and the feeling between your legs. The room feels warmer, it starts to be overwhealming, you suddenly become aware of the hot water and the sweat on the back of your neck. The smell of jasmine is still present, but it is overshadowed by the smell of her hair that has not yet touched the water. The taste of wine and strawberry in your mouth is still there, but now you can taste her too.  Some candles have already melted. 

Her hand immediately stops, and before you can complain, she shuts you up with a kiss. 

“I want to taste you” she breathes seconds before running her tongue across your parted lips, giving your shivers. 

That's all you need to hear to know what to do, you don't need to be told twice or given directions on what to do. It is one of those things that you have internalized so much that your body executes the action before your brain can process the information. You untangle your limbs and she gives you space as she helps you to reposition yourself. 

When you stand up, you notice the change in temperature hitting your skin. Your nipples stiffen against the cool air just as they do between her hot lips. This contrast feels good especially when you sit around the bathtub with your back against the cold tiles to spread your legs for her. Chaeyoung is in front of you, looking you in the eyes, but it doesn't take long for her to turn her gaze downward lingering on the marks on your neck, the nipples she so loves to savor and the fuzzy scratches on your stomach she has left tonight until her eyes land on your glistening core, with your swollen clit trapped between your puffy folds. It is not a matter of want anymore, you need her. 

The same desire you see in her eyes is what she sees in yours when you have her on her knees ready to devour you and get lost between your legs. Now the water barely covers half of her thighs giving you a delicious view of your girlfriend. Her petite frame, her tattooed arms in full display, the slightly marked muscles of her abdomen, the untattooed hand with freshly cut nails that seconds ago was bringing you to the edge and a little above her perfectly trimmed bush, the tattoo on her hip that nobody but you have witnessed. 

It doesn't matter how many times you have seen her because she always manages to take your breath away and fluster you when she stares at you with that look where love and lust blend together. 

“God... you look so good and so delicious. I love you so much” she says in such an adorable tone that you can't help but giggle. 

“I don't know how you can be cute in moments like this, I love you more” you reply grabbing her hands and pulling her closer to you. 

“I'm not cute” she whines proving that even when she is about to go down on you she can be so adorable. 

She realizes it herself before you tease her further and hides in your neck as you chuckle, but the next thing she does takes you by surprise. When she bites your neck right at your pulse point, a moan comes from your throat. 

Right away, you place her hands on your hips and pull her close, trapping her body between your thighs. Chaeyoung does the rest and gets into the right position to then slide her arms around your legs so that they are over her shoulders. Her slender fingers dig into the flesh of your thighs with possession while yours tangle in her hair tightly, giving away your desperation. 

She presses gentle kisses on your inner thighs, no matter how much she wants to taste you or how much you need to feel her mouth, those are mandatory and they melt you every time. The trail starts down near your knees and as she gets closer to your center those kisses are followed by little nibbles and kitten licks. 

“You taste like soap” she giggles. 

You don't answer her, but instinctively grab the glass that is still full of white wine and spill it on your bare leg, making her gulp. Despite the initial surprise, she reacts swiftly and catches the drops of wine before they reach the junction between your legs. You know she wouldn't let a drop of her favorite wine go to waste, especially if it means tasting it straight from your skin. For some it may be arguable, but for Chaeyoung, wine has never tasted so good to her as it does right now. 

“You're crazy” she whispers before biting you tenderly.

His mouth does not distract you from the hand that dangerously runs its thumb around your pussy making you shudder slightly in anticipation. Soon the touch of her fingers is replaced by her tongue that runs along your slit from your hole to your clit tasting your juices. As you exhale the air that has been caught in your lungs, she inhales the scent of your arousal. 

When you feel yourself getting so close to where you were just moments ago by her just lapping on your juices you know you won't be able to last much longer. She is not much farther away as you can constantly feel the vibration of her moaning against your core just from eating you out. If this goes on you are confident that she might cum just from going down on you and that is incredibly hot. She really enjoys this and you are really taking advantage of her skills, she is just so good at this. 

Chaeyoung knows what she is doing and knows your body better than you do. Tongue flat as she licks your cunt up and down, but hardening the muscle as she strokes the bundle of nerves just before wrapping her lips around it and sucking on it threatening to break the knot in your abdomen. Both of your breaths quicken and get uneven, merging in the air with moans, muffled cursing and the obscene sound of your wetness against her tongue. 

Once again the fingers join in, collecting the spit and slick mess that coats your pussy and drips down your thighs into your ass. It is hot, dirty and lewd in contrast to the softness of her features and the tranquility reflected in her face with her eyes shut as she plays with your juices and intoxicates herself in your scent. The same scent that is now coating the fingers that playfully feel your entrance making a beg to slip in between the moans.

“I need you inside” you plead softly. 

Seconds later she shoves two fingers inside while her mouth focuses on your clit, drawing shapes with her tongue getting hungrier and faster, matching the speed of her fingers as they fill you up and take you closer to the edge. 

Her name is heard coming out of your lips louder and louder, each one of them is followed by a soft echo that screams her name with you again. 

“Chaeyoung…”.

“Right there!”.

“So good”.

 “Don’t stop”.

At your prayers she can only give you what you ask for by making your body go back and forth between the quivering of your limbs and the tightness of your muscles as your back arches in pleasure and your legs lock around her head. As her movements speed up and her fingers reach new spots when they arch inside you, the tension is what takes over your body as you chase your high. 

Your hand pulls her hair burying her face in your cunt while the other finds a place squeezing your breast, trusting that Chaeyoung is there to get you. Feeling your body come over the edge your hips begin to move erratically, to her it doesn't go unnoticed and she says the words that she knows will lead you to where you need to be. Pulling her mouth just inches away from your center she whispers against your sensitive skin as she looks into your eyes that fight to stay open. 

“You’re taking me so well, cum for me now baby”. 

That couple of words followed by her fingers hitting that soft spot inside you as her lips catch your clit is the last thing you needed for the wave of pleasure to wash over your body, finally releasing the tension stuck in your lower abdomen and shutting down your senses for a brief moment. All you feel is the release as your vision fades to black and the sounds around you become a blur. 

Before you can regain consciousness you notice the last few licks as she cleans you up and keeps her fingers inside you so you can ride out the earth shattering orgasm you have just had. She carefully laps up every last drop of cum being careful not to overstimulate you, but even that doesn't stop your legs from shaking before the tension in your limbs dissipates completely. 

You are still panting when you hear her giggling and look down, encountering an image that you can only hope will be burned into your memory. 

You can safely say it is the most erotic thing you have ever laid eyes on in your entire life. Still between your legs you see her face framed by her messy black hair, bringing out even more of the blush on her cheeks that complements her fleshy pink lips coated in your slick as she is grinning. She has the same dark hooded eyes she has when she is starting to get drunk, perhaps she's actually drunk on you.

[natsury-kazuki]

Valentine cards 2024

Hi, this time I found them all at once, enjoy the answers from our dear NRC students and teachers! :)

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HEARTSLABUYL

My dear friend

Thank you for your gift. I’m not an expert, but I once read that this type of thing can help relaxation. I’ll certainly try it out soon? I’ll make you herbal tea sometime as a token of my gratitude.

Riddle Rosehearts

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Heya, pal-

I never thought you'd get me something so fancy! It's got just the kind of scent I like. You've got perfect taste. I'm gonna use it soon-thanks! As for what to give you in return, well.. Got any requests? Just don't go too overboard.

Ace Trappola

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My good friend-

Thanks for the gift! I didn't think it'd be something so fancy. You've got a good eye for this stuff, Prefect! It's nice having a fresh scent in my room to help me focus when I'm studying! Wait until you see what grade I get on my next test.

Deuce Spade

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Eyyy, friendo!

Thanks for the totes' Cammable gift! It looks nice, AND it's

got a fragrance that's right up Cay-Cay's alley. I'm super excited for the gift-back, and hope you are, too! I'm gonna get you something you'll be amped to post about on Magicam.

Cater Diamond

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Hello, friend-

Thank you for the lovely gift. I've been busy lately, so it's nice to have something to help me relax. You're always going the extra mile for everyone around you. I'll bring some homemade sweets over soon to say thanks, okay?

Trey Clover

---

SAVANACLAW

Hey-

Allow me to thank you for your generous gift. Heh. Can't believe you actually picked out a halfway decent fragrance. I might actually keep this. I thought about sending you something in return if the mood struck me, but this thank-you note should do the job just fine, right?

Leona Kingscholar

-

Hey-

Thanks for the gift! I don't buy things that aren't albsolute necessities, so it's nice getting something like this. Don't get me wrong, though. I'm REALLY not picky when it comes to people giving me presents, so feel free to keep giving me whatever you like!

Ruggie Bucchi

-

Hi.

Thanks for the gift. This is the kind of subtle fragrance I can see myself using, I don't like being indebted to others, so I'll think of something to send in return so we're even. Don't expect too nuch. Just sit tight.

Jack Howl

---

OCTAVINELLE

My boon companion-

Thank you for your wonderful gift. You have quite the eye for quality and chose a fine fragrance. That said, I prefer not to accept gifts without providing anything in return. Expect something from me of equivalent value soon.

Azul Ashengrotto

-

My good friend-

Thank you for your lovely present. Did you know that morays have keen senses of smell? I'll quite enjoy this. I'd like to treat you to a drink at the Mostro Lounge in return. What do you say?

Jade Leech

-

Dear Little Shrimpy-

What a neat choice for a present. Did you pick out this scent 'cause it reminded you of me? Kinda funny if this is the vibe I give you. I guess I'll use it if I feel like it. No promises.

Floyd Leech

---

SCARABIA

To my dear friend

Thanks for the gift. You picked this fragrance out for me,right? I’m flattered! Ooh, I know? Next time you’re in a gift-giving mood, you could take me shopping to help pick it out! The more the merrier, right? Then again, that might defeat the purpose of the gift… But let’s not sweat the details!

Kalim Al-Asim

-

Hello

I was surprised enough just to receive a gift from you, but a fragrance? You never fail to surprise. It couldn’t have been easy selecting this. I’ll have to gift you something appropriate in return

Jamil Viper

---

POMEFIORE

Dearest friend-

Thank you for your gift. It was a rather thoughtful choice; I can use this when I'm doing stretches. What would you like in return, I wonder? You're getting something hand-picked by me, so I've no doubt you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Vil Schornheit

-

 Bonjour-

And merci boucoup! Did you choose this just for me? I'm delighted. The design is so lovely and elegant. I normally avoid using fragrances unless it's a special occasion, in which case I shall happily wear one-the one you gave me, of course.

Rook Hunt

-

Dear classmate—

Thanks for the gift! I don't know much about fragrances, but this one's mighty fine! It makes my dorm room feel a smidge more fancy. I'd better get you something nice in return. Its kinda fun thinking up ideas for that.

Epel Felmier  

---

IGNIHYDE

@YOU

Uh, are u saying I stink? Is this like a passive-aggressive gesture or sth? I have questions but since u gave it to me, I greatefully accept? I donc’t pay much attention to grangrances, but this one smelled p. dece when I gave it a whiff.

Idia Shroud

-

Hello, Perfect

Thank you for the gift! It’s a fragrance, right? So this is how you perceive me? That’s fascinating! I’m about to do a thorough analysis of its composition? Who knows? I might discover something neat. Let me know what fragrances you’re into sometimes!

Ortho shroud

---

DIASOMNIA

To my good friend-

Thank you for your gift. Hmm... This fragrance is meant for pleasure and relaxation? What a tasteful choice. I rather like it; perhaps I shall take more of an interest in these things. You would be welcome to pay me a visit, by the way, should you feel so inclined. I would enjoy sharing an old tale or two. –

Malleus Draconia

-

Salutations-

Thank you for your gift. This smell is so nice and relaxing, it makes me want to nod off. I hope this improves the quality of my sleep and helps me to wake up sooner when my alarm clocks go off. I'll let you know how it goes, Hopefully well.

Silver

-

Human-

I've received your gift. Fragrances are a part of one's personal grooming, and you had the nerve to gift one to ME? Challenge accepted. I'll come up with the perfect thing to return the sentiment. You're going to get what's coming to you-mark my words!

Sebek Zigvolt

-

Greetings!

Thank you for picking something out for me. It's a rather nice gift. Immersing myself in an unusual fragrance reminds me of my days visiting other lands. I know! I should cook you some foreign cuisine as a token of gratitude! I can hardly wait.

Lilia Vanrouge

---

NRC STAFF

Dear esteemed student

I was quite taken aback when an unexpected package arrived at the headmage’s office ! To think you would send me something so thoughtful… Hmmm. This fragrance suits my taste nicely. Normally I wouldn’t be able to accept personal gifts, but I think I’ll make an exception for this, seeing as I’m so kind,

Dire Crowel

-

Dear pup

What is this? Giving personal gifts to teachers is hardly good pup behavior. But the moment I opened the wrapping, I could tell you picked this out for me. This design is suitable enough, as is the fragrance itself. I suppose I must commend your knack for gift-giving. Good boy.

Divus Crewel

-

Dear juvenile

I generally decline gifts from students, but you clearly chose this scent out of respect for me. I won’t use it around Lucius, but it might be nice to use in the staff room every once in a while? I gratefully accept.

Mozus Trein

-

Dear student

What is this? Did I give you homework assignment that involved getting me a present? Kidding, of course. This is the perfect scent for a guy as cool as me! I’ll teach you how to make my signature Vargas protein drink in return!

Ashton Vargas

-

Heya, my little imp!

What is up? Did you pick this out just for me? It’s fantastic scent, thanks! If you’re interested in this type of thing, I happen to have a fine looking forward to your next visit.

SAM

---

Other

Dear minion

Mrah?! I was expecting tuna, but instead I get some weird thing called fragrance? What IS this thing? I woulda taken tuna in a heartbeat, but since my hench-human picked this out for me, I guess a proper boss would put it to good use. Be grateful for my kindness, partner!

Grim

[skibasyndrome]

why are your kinktober stories all bottom Simon heavy? I trusted we would see more bottom Wille from you /gen

Anon, up front, genuinely sorry if you meant well and are now about to get the brunt of my frustration that I've built up for over a decade of existing in fandoms and fanfic spaces surrounding queer men and their sex.

Ooookay, I try not to engage in this discourse normally because frankly? It's kinda draining, because the way queer men's sex lifes are picked apart in lots of online spaces is not okay and, frankly, hurtful. But, okay:

I have posted 10 of 31 stories

I intentionally don't tag any of my smut as top!/bottom! anything (tho I don't mind other writers doing it - go off) cause frankly? I don't believe that's something that should matter. It doesn't to me when I think of wilmon. Preferences are fine, cool, awesome, both irl and in reading, there are couples who like to do things one way only and there are couples who mix things up and there's lots of stuff in between. People love to bottom! People love to top! People love any- and everything in between and that is great for them. All of that is fun and cool and absolutely awesome if everyone involved is on board. I simply don't have any one way I headcanon wilmon, I literally just go with whatever the vibe is. That also means I don't believe in having to strike a 50/50 balance or whatever. Also because

sex between men (and, since in one of the stories Wille is a trans woman, between all people, for that matter) is about more than anal and/or penetration. I love to read and write about Wille bottoming, love to write and read about Simon bottoming. But that's noooooot all there is. One thing I do try to do with my smut is write about some of the other ways sex can look. Which includes (mutual) masturbation, hand jobs, blow jobs, intercrural, frottage, a myriad of other acts. All of these are fullfilling ways of having sex, all of these don't follow top/bottom "logic" or whatever you'd like to call it. So what do we do about that?

I know some people - not saying you do, this, anon - like to conflate topping and bottoming with power dynamics, be it sub/dom type of stuff, or just... some vague idea of who is superior or whatever. And that very much CAN be the case, I'd argue Wille bottoming in my vampire fic or even Wille during the wax play in the one fic and the intercrural afterwards is definitely bordering sub-y territory. But you know? That also very much doesn't have to be the case. In the fic that includes 69 it's Simon "calling the shots" or whatever you'd like to call it, despite being the one that's being penetrated. I have fics planned out where the opposite is the case, I have plenty of fics where bottoming doesn't have anything to do about being sub or being dom or anything like that. I think there's this idea going around that somehow, (gay) sex acts are linked to power and power exchange and that there needs to be some equilibrium or... justice??? And. No. That's not how consensual sex, be it in relationships or hookups, works in my mind. In consensual sex, there is no disadvantage in bottoming or no need for any of the partners to bottom to fix some sort of hierarchy. Because there is none. Not in the consensual sex of two (or more) partners that want to have sex to have a good time or feel close or relax or any of the other reasons people have sex.

Fair question to ask, just know that I don't write bottom anything for the sake of making a point, I just write whatever feels like the characters would enjoy it in that particular moment in time, whatever suits the POV I wanna go with. I don't keep a tally of times penetrative sex has been part of a story and who did what. If that's a no-go for you, that's fine and I won't hold it against you. I have a bunch more stories coming up with all kinds of dynamics, all kinds of sex acts, all kinds of differently written versions of our two blorbos.

hope this was concise enough and I recognize that I've definitely put all kinds of other, adjacent, points into this, but this gay man right here is kind of fucking sick and tired of seeing stuff assigned to gay sex acts that are just. sex between consenting partners

[synergysilhouette]

I HATE to be that guy, but I'll say it: Raya's concept art is SO much better than the final product. I try not to pick favorites, but this may have been a film that needed to be made in 2D

Nevermind the fact that some of it reminds me of Studio Ghibli's art style--it's giving me "Princess Mononoke" meets "Spirited Away" vibes. I hope they go for that if they ever do a Japanese-inspired film (which I've created a mood board for). I'm curious as to what the plot was gonna be--if I'm not mistaken, a lot of this comes from the mid to late 2010s, years before the final product came out. A sad part of this film is that you can never really enjoy all the culture of each land since:

it's an amalgamation of SEA countries

Raya is constantly on the move and the world is ending, so you can't really take your time exploring.

I will say that I'm glad the final product omitted some of the more sci-fi elements of some of the concept art, as well as making Raya older than she's portrayed in some of this; we need more Disney leads in their late teens/twenties.

[fayes-fics]

It Had To Be You: Chapter 9 - Nobody Else Gave Me A Thrill

Masterpost PREV | NEXT

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader, Modern AU

Summary: You two finally figure it all out on New Year's Eve...

artwork credit @colettebronte

Warnings: none, really… just some swearing and love confessions.

Word Count: 3.8k

Authors Note: A multi-chapter modern rom-com retelling of When Harry Met Sally. Here we are; this is the final chapter! Both reader and Benedict finally see the truth. There will be a short, hopefully humourous epilogue to this story as well, which I will post tomorrow. Thanks to @colettebronte for betaing. I hope you have all enjoyed this fic <3

For the next few weeks, the dreary weather, the clocks changing, and the chilly nights drawing in match your sullen mood. Your argument with Benedict at the wedding made you so sad but resolute to try and put it behind you.

It's the last weekend in November when you are buying a Christmas tree that you feel the worst. Making a mess of dragging the tree back to your place alone, leaving a trail of needles behind you, you stop halfway and slump onto a doorstep. Recalling with perfect clarity how you and Benedict had bought one together from the same man the previous year, laughing carefree as you easily carried it between you. Then you drank mulled wine as you haphazardly threw on lights and ornaments, dancing to cheesy Christmas songs. It's what you miss the most—his companionship, the ease of time spent with one of your favourite people.

Just as you are wrestling the tree through your front door, exhausted, sweaty and prickled by a thousand tiny shitty needles that seem to have it out for you, your phone pings with a message.

BB: I'm sorry for how things ended at the wedding. I've been thinking about it for weeks now. Please call me. I want to talk. 

Pride (and your current disastrous had-a-fight-with-a-tree-and-lost appearance) stops you from doing what you genuinely want to—picking up your phone and Facetiming him to sort it all out.

Not ready yet.

__

Two weeks later, it's mid-December, and you are sitting cross-legged on your living room floor with a big glass of wine, wrapping presents for friends, when your phone pings again. For a while now, almost every day, he has been sending links to Insta posts with adorable and hilarious content. Each of which you have enjoyed but couldn't bring yourself to reply to. This time, it’s a message.

BB: If you are available at the moment, please call me.

You stare at the little pop-up notification and take a gulp, a weird weight in your chest at the idea you might cave this time. Perhaps. Once you are done wrapping this gift. A few minutes later, your phone pings again.

BB: Okay, I assume no call means:

BB: (A) you can't take a call right now

BB: (B) you can, but you don't want to talk to me or 

BB: (C) you desperately do want to talk to me but are trapped under something heavy

BB: If it's A or C, please call me back later, doesn't matter what time

BB: Also, if it’s C, please call 999 if you are in danger, then call me after. I don't have any heavy-lifting equipment… 

You can't help but giggle at his gentle, silly humour, attempting to diffuse the tension. A large part of you wants to call; you even have the phone in your hand, but at the last minute, you rest it against your forehead with a sigh, something stopping you. Your stupid rebound fling being the biggest one, Benedict’s cutting remark about how quickly you let someone else into your bed, making your stomach roil. 

Still not ready yet.

—

“Obviously, she doesn't want to speak to me,” Benedict laments, his words muffled into a scatter cushion on Kate and Anthony’s sofa. 

It's the morning after they've returned from honeymoon, three days before Christmas. While they are thankful Benedict popped over with some basics to make breakfast, they could do without his melancholy—they’re much more about a ‘let’s have newlywed sex on the kitchen table’ vibe.

“What do I have to do? Get hit over the head? Be in some calamitous accident?” Benedict whines, twisting his head in aggravation as if trying to burrow himself head-first into the furniture.

‘What do we do?’ Anthony mouths to Kate, who throws her hands up defeatedly.

‘How should I know?’ she mouths back, frowning. ‘He's your brother.’

‘Your friend's fault,’ Anthony shoots back.

Kate crosses her arms and gets a look like a sour lemon, and he instantly regrets that line.

Benedict lifts his head to look up at them, and she has to stifle a giggle behind her hand at the deep red imprint of the cushion zipper on his forehead.

“If she wants to talk to me. She will call me back, right? I'm done with making an idiot of myself….” Benedict claims boldly.

__

You are sitting on the sofa at your childhood home early evening on Christmas Day, almost disgustingly full of Baileys (your mum's tipple of choice on this day) and Christmas pud, watching The Wrong Trousers - a family tradition - when your phone pings with a message.

It's from Benedict and your stomach vaults. You honestly thought after more than a week of silence, he had given up trying. And part of you was so sad. There is no text this time, just a video attachment. You excuse yourself to the downstairs cloakroom, taking a seat on the closed lid of the toilet, intrigued as to what it is.

The video starts with him looking directly into the camera, his handsome face filling the frame and making your stomach swoop again. Fuck, you have missed seeing it.

“Merry Christmas y/n. I hope you are having a nice time. I miss you, and I hate how we left things,” he opens honestly, “and when Bridgertons don't know what to do, we always act stupidly. It's our ‘thing’. So here, You can blame this on my genetics...”

The video cuts to black briefly and then fades into him, a huge 6ft lump, crowded behind a plastic toy piano on the floor, probably one of Daphne’s kids' toys. You instantly giggle at the ridiculous visual as he apes a maestro, closes his eyes as if about to play Chopin, and flexes his hands. Then, the tinny, electric sound of some familiar notes being played hesitantly begins. He isn't exactly a natural pianist.

“Hey, I didn't just meet you, And this is crazy, 

You know my number, So call me maybe,

It's hard to feel right without you, lady

You know my number, so call me, maybe…”

You are instantly laughing. He's such an adorable, charming idiot. Sitting behind a miniature plastic piano and playing, half in earnest, half in jest. At least his voice can hold a semi-decent tune. It brings an affectionate mist to your eyes even as it continues…

“Before you came into my life, I missed you so bad

I missed you so bad; I missed you so, so bad

Before you came into my life, I missed you so bad

And you should know that, I miss you now… so, so bad….”

For the last few words, he slows down the song and looks directly down the lens pointedly.

Something in his pleading look is the straw that breaks the camel's back proverbially, and with a slight tremor in your hand, you scroll to his name and hit the FaceTime button before you can think twice about it. The sound of the tone, as it rings, feels so loud, and each crisp ‘bringggg’ makes your nerves jangle. Just as you are about to hang up, the call connects.

“I'm sorry it took me so long to answer. I had to find a private spot.” he sounds a little winded.

“Where are you?” you frown, an unfamiliar background behind him.

“My childhood bedroom. Aubrey Hall.”

“Oh my god! Show me!” You enthuse, your initial equivocation derailed by nosiness, which you decide to frame instead in your mind as mere curiosity.  You never got to see it the wedding weekend for, well, reasons you don't want to dwell on right now.

He quickly flips the camera around, giving you an audio-guided tour of the room he grew up in. Dark blue walls with framed posters for his beloved Blur alongside Travis, Radiohead and Shaun of the Dead. Silly stick-on glow-in-the-dark stars on the high ceiling that are likely too high for anyone to bother getting out a ladder and peeling off. Shelves with little wooden car models he made with his dad before he died, mixed in with certificates of achievement from school, shiny brass archery trophies, and his early sketches in those cheap snap-in frames. And lastly, a collection of jagged small rocks and colourful pebbles. It makes you feel so very affectionate for little teenage Benedict.

“You are bloody adorable!” you blurt out, almost forgetting all the awkwardness from the past few weeks.

The camera flips around, and his lopsided grin fills the screen. “Thank you. I try to make a habit of it…”

You smile back and then sigh. “I’ve missed this,” you confess quietly, wistfully. 

“I’ve missed this too. You. Us. Can we please be friends again? Please? I know we both have a lot of things to talk about. With that night and all… but… can we reset? I need you, Bluey. I am miserable without my best friend,” he pouts, his raw honesty making your chest ache. 

It’s exactly how you feel, too. Except with a massive pang of regret that he seems to want to forget your magical night together. Sex is never like that, at least not for you—electric and addictive. Doing a reset to save your friendship feels like the most logical step. Still, it doesn’t stop the “what if” fantasies running in your head with increasing frequency, especially on a day like today—nostalgia, sentiment and overindulgence swirling in your being. 

“I would like us to be friends again,” you exhale, a lie by slight omission, drumming your fingertips on your cheek nervously to stop you from saying more. 

“Wonderful! Then it is so! I can’t wait to see you again! Are you going to the New Year's party? The one Simon & Daph are hosting at the Sky Terrace? Cos if you are, I was wondering, if you don’t have a date if we could go together? We always said we would be each other's plus one if neither of us is with anyone…”

That he wants to completely reset to that world makes your heart crack. You want to scream at him, ‘No! I want to be your real date! Pick me, for real, this time!’

“I… can’t do that,” you waver, and it comes off sounding tired.

“You have a date?” It’s soft, hesitant, trepidatious.

“No…” you admit, “I just don’t think it’s a good idea to go together like that. I… I can’t be your consolation prize anymore, Benedict,” you blurt out, the hurt taking over your tongue.

The look of stunned surprise on his face makes it worse. As if he had never even seen it from that perspective.

“That’s not what I….” he begins but is interrupted by a loud door bang as it slams into the wall and a yelling voice.

“Stop fucking hiding and get your bloody arse back downstairs. You can’t miss family dinner on Christmas Day!” Colin scolds loudly offscreen.

“I’ve got to go…,” he sighs reluctantly as an arm manhandles him up and off the bed. “Merry Christmas,” he adds, belatedly realising you both forgot to say it earlier on the call.

“Whoever it is, hang up. No one is more important than family on Christmas,” Colin gripes. “That’s it, I’m taking your phone…”.

The screen is filled with random shapes and loud noises as they seem to wrestle like children. And then the call suddenly disconnects. 

You sigh and tip sideways against the cold tile of your parents' cloakroom wall.

Merry Christmas, indeed.

__

Benedict takes stock of his surroundings. December 31st, 11:00pm, lying on his stomach on his sectional chaise, staring up at the big flatscreen on his wall.

This isn't so bad… he tries to convince himself. I've got Jools Holland’s Hootenanny - the only decent New Year's programme, some Glenfiddich and Mini Cheddars - the best snack there is… 

He sighs and realises how pathetic he sounds, even in his own mind, alone in an empty flat.

__

The man whirls you around, and you are almost thrown straight into Kate and Anthony.

“I should never have let you drag me to this,” you grouse so only they can hear.

They both shoot you an apologetic look until you are whipped away again. This man’s dancing style is more akin to a waltzer amusement ride than anything sensual or fun. Your shoulder is already aching. It's a far cry from the surprising salsa Benedict pulled out of the bag last New Year’s Eve. And the idle thought of him has you spiralling…

“Mind if we stop?” you puff as the band finishes the song with a flourish. He’s some slick European investment banking type, and really, you couldn't give two shits about offending him, merely your ingrained politeness kicking in.

He nods and goes off to grab drinks as you stand, hands on hips, trying to gather your breath as you watch all the people moving like a mass of limbs on the crowded dancefloor as the following number begins.

Why the fuck am I here?

__

This is much better… Benedict rationalises to himself as he wanders down the rainy, empty East London streets not far from his Hoxton pad. Who needs to be at a big, crowded party pretending to have a good time?

He pauses outside a trendy shop on Old St, selling overpriced crap that he's not even sure what it is.

See? I can do some window shopping. He tells himself silently—clutching at anything to distract himself from the creeping sense of dread in his gut. A slow twisting knife as he thinks about you dancing the night away, ringing in the New Year with some fancy, handsome man who definitely doesn't deserve you.

What does it matter to me? We are just friends. Best friends… the only friend I ever want to see every day… the only one who truly matters….

He has thought about how to repair the damage between you so much over the last few weeks that he's exhausted himself. Really, he just wants you back. All of you, ideally, but being realistic, any part of yourself you will let back into his life. The suggestion of a reset he made on Christmas Day being his cowardly way out.

—

You are fake laughing at the banker’s story as you lean around the pillar you are backing yourself against in an attempt to secure more personal space. Glad of the heated lamps and the glass overhang to shelter from the drizzle.

“I'm going home,” you growl.

“You’ll never find an Uber,” Kate points out deadpan as you turn back around and keep faking amusement.

__

Just as his thoughts spiral, Benedict hears a chuckle on the other side of the road. There, a couple are laughing together, wrapped in each other's arms, kissing, looking like no one else in the world matters… and it’s like a lightning rod hits him square in the chest.

Suddenly, all he can see are images of you, fluttering like motioned-filled playing cards from above, swirling into his eyeline, then floating onto the glistening pavement around him. Vignettes of his life and where you intersect at so many pivotal moments. The day he left uni - the car ride where you bickered like an old married couple, the day he moved to Paris - your dilated pupils and hitched breath on the Eurostar when he whispered in your ear, the unerring sympathy when you heard about his divorce, the way you held his hand when you wandered after dinner somewhere (he doesn't even recall where… only that it was with you), watching movies together on FaceTime, your incredulity when he confessed to his uneventful recurring sex dream, your surprise and, yes, arousal as he led you in the salsa dance, the way you tucked so neatly into his arms haunting him. And finally, how it felt to be buried inside your gorgeous body as you clung to him, calling his name like a siren song, intimacy like he has never known, the profundity of the connection petrifying the very life out of him. 

But as he stares down at his tatty old Converse, the same ones he wore the day you met, in fact, all he sees in the puddle beneath him is the simple truth he has been in denial about, possibly for a decade or more. Rippling refractions of your face - your knowing smile, bright eyes, your wonderful, happy expression…

And before his brain acknowledges it, his feet are moving….

Walking fast…

Then it’s a jog…

Then it’s a run….

.. his feet carrying him to the one place he knows with every fibre of his being he wants to be.

—

You wander as if in a daze, seemingly surrounded by nothing but couples, kissing, dancing, whispering, and it's the final straw. You spy Kate and Anthony sipping champagne together and slope over.

“I'm going,” you sigh.

“But it's almost midnight,” Anthony protests.

“Being surrounded by people kissing is just…” you shrug, melancholy creeping in like a clingy fog around your heart.

“I’ll kiss you,” Kate placates, and Anthony perks up to no end at that suggestion, nodding enthusiastically as you both roll your eyes, bemused. “Stay? Please?” she pleads, pouting and grabbing your hands.

“Thanks, Kate. But no. I have to go. Have a wonderful night,” you bid them, kissing her gently on the cheek. “Happy New Year,” you whisper as she returns the greeting.

__

Benedict's lungs are burning as he races down Old St towards Shoreditch, not far from where you celebrated last year. He ignores the ache in his muscles and keeps going, checking his watch to see 11:56pm and racing harder.

I need to be there at midnight!

__

As you walk to pick up your coat, a sight makes your heart leap into your mouth and stops you dead in your tracks.

There, rounding the top stair, casual in old faded jeans, those ancient Converse and a chunky knit jumper… is Benedict. Hair fluffy and dishevelled from the rain, out of breath and scanning the crowd desperately. As if he is seeking someone.

Then his eyes finally land on you, and your world tilts. 

Oh god, is he here… for… me?!?

Then he is striding purposefully towards you, and it seems like the crowds part. His eyes blisteringly intense, like they were on that fateful night. You try to school your face, aiming for casual indignance; you probably fail spectacularly— your heart thumping wildly.

“I've been doing a lot of thinking…” he begins as he pulls up before you. “And the thing is… I love you..”

Everything grinds to a halt, and your head feels dizzy.

This must be a prank, surely?

“What?” you stutter, disbelief rocking your core.

“I love you,” he says with a simple shrug as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

“Ben.. I… what do you expect me to say?” you blurt out, floored.

“How about you love me too,” he smiles a tiny fraction, and you hate it.

You hate how RIGHT he is. Your body is a total jumble of live wires, but your mind is suddenly calm. It's like the clouds of your thoughts part, and it all seems crystal clear. And yet, something in your stubborn heart won't let you admit it. Terrified what it could mean to voice it.

“Look, Ben, I know it's New Year, and I know you may be lonely tonight. But please don't do this,” you implore haltingly, tears prickling hot in the corners of your eyes, “...not like this,” you whisper, defeated.

“Okay, how about like this….” he throws his hands up. “I love that you won't admit you love me. I love that you are looking at me like you want to kill me right now. I love that my body is screaming at me cos I ran here as fast as I could.” he gestures down at his slightly shaky legs.

“Ten seconds to New Year's!!” a loud voice blares out over the speakers.

“TEN!!” the crowd chants.

“I love that we are idiots who would never admit to how in love we are.”

“NINE!”

“I love that you are my blue lobster, rare and beautiful as a diamond but a delicious soft treat under that hard as nails shell….” 

“EIGHT!”

He tilts your chin to look up at him, a thumb swiping a tear you didn't even know had escaped. 

“SEVEN!”

“Don't leave me out here in the wind, y/n…,” he murmurs softly.

“SIX!”

“I… I love that you never give up,” you whisper so quietly even you can barely hear it. 

The smile that lights up Benedict’s face makes your whole being feel like the stars live inside your chest.

“FIVE!”

“I love that you take homemade salads on a road trip,” he smirks playfully, referring to the first day you spent together all those years ago.

“FOUR!” 

“I love that you kept your amazing dance prowess under wraps,” you laugh over a stilted snuffle, everything in you fizzling.

“THREE!”

“I love that I can still smell you on my clothes after we spend the day together,” he sighs, moving in closer, your eyes hypnotised by the movement of his cupid’s bow.

“TWO!”

“I love that you came here tonight,” you admit, your hands circling his forearms as you sway slightly in unison.

“ONE!”

“I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night,” he confesses, his lips ghosting over yours now, smiling crookedly even as he speaks.

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!” the crowd chants.

All around you, party poppers go off, colourful ribbons of streamers, and the sound of glasses clinking fills the air. But it’s background noise, your whole focus on each other.

Finally, your lips meet, the fireworks under your ribs matching those in the skies above, the same as it was that first time weeks ago. You melt into each other's embrace, your kiss a seal of a pact and the promise of something new and infinite.

“For the record,” he rumbles, his minty breath hot on your lips, the strains of Auld Lang Syne ringing around the rooftop. “I'm not saying this because I’m lonely and not because it’s the New Year. I came here tonight because when you finally realise you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start…”

“...as soon as possible,” you exhale, completing his sentence with him as he nods, grinning from ear to ear. 

The drunken chorus around you gets louder; he chuckles and shakes his head. “I’ve never understood this stupid song.”

“I think it’s about remembering not to forget. Or not forgetting to remember. Or something,” you peal a laugh, knowing you are talking gibberish and not giving a damn. “Anyway, it’s about old friends,” you add pointedly, moving in for another spine-tingling, heart-melting kiss.

As you part, he cradles your jaw in his hands. “It was only ever you, y/n,” he sighs, hazy eyes burning into yours, his whisper fervent but contented into your skin. “It had to be you.”

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