#I hope Jennifer Garner finds a better man

[softsan]

˚ 🥀⊹ 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐋, 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄. (𝐩𝐭.𝟏)

✉️ ・ 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭.

✉️ ・ ── 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬: | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 |

✉️ ・ ── 𝐦𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 | 𝐲/𝐧'𝐬 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬

✉️ ・ ── 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: Mafia AU, Angst, Kingpin!Taeyong, Queenpin!Y/N, Fem!Reader, Childhood friends, Betrayal, Enemies to lovers, Eventual Smut. ✉️ ・ ── 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧:  You were the only surviving heir of the old-time Mafia kingpin that had ruled the four territories. You were long thought to be dead, living the normal life you had always wanted...Until you run into a Taeyong, a formidable ghost from your past. You are then thrown back into the Mafia underbelly, reuniting with enemies you had hoped had forgotten you. Will you run away? Will you stand beside Taeyong, kingpin of the North, and be his queen? Or will you take your rightful revenge.

✉️ ・ ── 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Possessive Themes, Future Explicit Sexual Content, Murder, Kidnapping, Strangulation, Torture, Weapons, Graphic Violence, Heavy Angst, Explicit Language, Alcohol Consumption, Mentions of Drugs, Betrayal, Morally Grey Characters.

✉️ ・ ── 𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭.

Past. 

You felt all the air leave your lungs, your chest constricting as you tried to gasp for just one more breath. You heard the patter of your blood as it hit the hardwood floors.

“Y/N,” His desperate eyes plead. 

“What did you do to her?!” Your brother demanded, yanking against the chains that were secured around his wrists. 

“Good catch Taeyong!” One of your captors clapped his hand on Taeyong’s back.

You tried to lift your shoulders, but they refused to support the weight of your head. You were but a lifeless heap, carelessly discarded and left to slowly bleed out on the ground. The man’s sickening laughter echoed throughout the room, filling what was left of your heart with dread.  

“Do it,” His voice urged, “Kill her now.”

Present.

“Today will be different,” You stared at yourself in the mirror, “Today I will smile, and I’ll mean it.” Your eyes circled down to your neck, your confidence waning. 

“Come on!” Your roommate urged, “You can say it better than that.” 

Your shoulders slumped in defeat, “You make me say the same thing at the start of every semester.”

Your roommate clicked her tongue, looking up from her phone. “And I believe this semester is going to be fucking fantastic.” She pointed at your white dress that cut just above the knees. “Look, we’re both looking cuter than ever. We have a new apartment,” She pointed to the living room’s ceiling to exaggerate her point. “This is our second year at college, and you, my friend, are going to put yourself out there.”

You shook your head in dread. “I thought we agreed that in this household, you can be the party fiend, and I’ll be the one that spends her nights binging TV shows on Netflix.”

Your roommate Jen threw you a dirty look.

“Hey! Who else is going to keep the universe in balance.”

Your roommate rolled her eyes. “The world is not going to stop spinning on its axis if you go out once in a while.”

“I highly doubt that.” You mutter to yourself, earning a playful hit from your dear roommate.

You and your roommate Jennifer had been cohabitating with one another since you were both seventeen. Back then, it had been a struggle to find someone willing to share a space with a teenager. That coupled with the awful reputation your foster father and sister had garner for themselves, you weren’t exactly considered an ideal house mate. However, to your pleasant surprise Jen was equally in need of someone to cover half of her rent. 

You had somewhat known about Jen prior to living with her. She had been quite popular at your school, the social butterfly. Admittedly, you were a little suprised to hear she like you, had moved out on her own, yet you never pried. 

Despite, her cheerful demeanor, you sensed a sadness akin to your own. You were both content pretending the other didn’t have secrets they’d buried deep inside their pasts. 

The day had been too long, and the sight of a setting sun was a welcome one. A picturesque scene of pink and oranges painted the skies which backdropped Taeyong’s beloved city. 

“Let’s get a drink to cool down,” Johnny piped, securing his gun back in his trousers.

Mark looked over disapprovingly, “You know you should really invest in a holster.”

“Not a chance!” Johnny grinned, “Taeil will flip if I make another extravagant purchase this month.” 

Taeyong slightly shook his head, half-heartedly smiling. Taeil, his consigliere had only gotten on Johnny’s case after he bought two restaurants and three record stores on a whim. Johnny simply was dead set on never purchasing himself a holster.  

Mark discerning Johnny’s lame excuse, decided to play along, “If you’re tight on money, why don’t we drink at the crappy-looking place.” He pointed to a shabby, bar with rusted molding at the end of the street. 

Taeyong grimaced, he didn’t like spending too much time in disputed territory. The street they were standing on fell in a grey area, both claimed by him, the King of the North, and the terrible Black Crow of the West. 

“We should head back closer to base,” Renjun cut in, noticing Taeyong’s hesitancy.  

Taeyong had his own bars and hotels where he could drink and dine with complete ease. He saw no need to do so here. 

“Let’s do it,” Johnny exclaimed, pulling a protesting Renjun into a friendly headlock.

“It’ll be fine,” Mark reassured, nudging Taeyong’s shoulder. “Nobody’s that stupid to take on all four of us.”

“I’m here! I’m here!” You breathlessly apologized to your manager, reaching for a bar apron.

“It’s fine,” He assured, handing you a docket, “First day back?” 

You nodded, trying to catch your breath “It’s the first day, and I feel like I’m already behind on all of my classes.” 

“Well, tonight should be pretty standard for a weekday.” He commented, his eyes scanning the empty tables, “I’ll be up upstairs talking to a supplier but, give me a wave if you need me.” 

“Will do.” It wasn’t uncommon for you to be working the bar alone.

The 'Old Sand Bucket' where you worked was certainly past its prime. Its interior was outdated, half of the bar stools wobbled, and even the bar counter was unleveled. It just wasn’t a place that attracted a surplus of people. 

You pulled your first load of wine glasses from the dishwasher, lifting them into the bar to be polished.

The door to the bar chimed, “Welcome to the Old Sand Bucket.” You said, without looking upward. “What can I get you?”

Taeyong gave the bar a lengthy overview. It didn’t appear to be suspicious, just the opposite. The dated bar was completely unoccupied beside the humming bartender who was mindlessly polishing wine glasses.

He examined you like the rest, evaluating the level of threat you were. Your head stayed down, occupied with your task. You barely spared a glance at his boys, who began ordering drinks.

You wore a simple black shirt underneath a bar apron with the ‘Old Sand Bucket’ labeled on its front. Your hair was tied in a low ponytail, revealing the curvature of your neck. At its base was a silky black ribbon knotted in a neat bow. Other than being pretty, you didn’t appear to stand out. 

Taeyong hummed, satisfied the bar his boys wanted to drink at was nothing more than a dinky, uninspired establishment.

You heard another person pull out a wonky barstool, which made four people in your bar. Not bad, as you usually didn’t have customers come in until half past nine. 

You placed down a bourbon and coke to your left—a man’s voice offering you a quick thanks.

“What can I get you?” You asked, finally looking up at the last man.

“Whatever’s good.”

Your eyes widened, blinking repeatedly, willing the ghost of your past to disappear back to your nightmares.

This can’t be real. This can’t be him. Please. No.

But he didn’t. He sat in front of you. His bored expression faded as he caught you staring. You immediately dropped your face, your face burning.

Taeyong furrowed his brows, confused. The way you looked at him just then… It was as if you knew him. He wasn’t mistaken. He couldn’t be. The way you were mumbling your answers, your arms shaking as you reached to pour a shot of vodka.

You did the best you could to keep a low profile, keeping your face down, and distracting yourself with work around the bar. You wanted nothing more than to abandon your shift— your heart furiously pounding every time you heard one of their four voices address you. However, at around eleven there was an unusual influx of people (what you believed to be a bachelor’s night out), therefore you needed to power through your discomfort. 

You wavered for your manager to join you downstairs, while you stepped out of the bar and started clearing tables. 

Taeyong kept you in the corner of his eye, unable to shake the curiosity that brewed in his stomach.

“Give us a smile, love,” Slurred one of the drunken bachelors, who had stripped off his shoes and was now wearing one on his head. 

You complied, in order not to make a scene. You reached over his table to pick up one of the empty pints. You felt the irksome feeling of fingers brushing against your neck. You jumped back, dropping your tray. Your hands immediately shot to your neck, clasping where your black ribbon ought to be. 

The shattering of glass made Taeyong stand, interrupting Renjun mid-sentence. Your eyes were aflame with anger, your mouth parting in horror. You were trying desperately to conceal the base of your neck.

Without a second thought, Taeyong approached, pulling the drunken patron up by his wrinkled collar. The man began sloppily flailing, trying to make his pathetic getaway. 

Taeyong snatched the black ribbon out of his hand, before not so gently throwing him to the ground.

“I believe this belongs to you.” Taeyong stepped forward, extending his arm in your direction. 

You instinctively stepped back, your eyes narrowing on the black ribbon between his fingers. There was no way for you to reach for your ribbon without exposing your neck.

“You keep it.” You said as firmly as you could, turning your back to him.

He watched as you retreated to one of the back rooms, his interest in you only spiking.

You hid yourself in one of the alcohol storerooms, searching for something to cover up your neck. You resorted to some paper towels stained with raspberry syrup. It wasn’t one of your greatest ideas, but it seemed to work when your manager came bursting in.

“Where’d you go?” Your manager pressed, “You left broken glass for me to clean up by table fourteen.” 

"It accidently lock myself in the storage rooms again.” You lied.

Your manager sighed, ushering you out.

You did a quick scan of the bar, noticing the four men had since left. 

“What happened to you?” Your manager pointed to the paper towels and raspberry syrup. 

“Ah,” You pressed the wet paper harder against your neck, “A customer spilled a drink all over me.” 

Your manager shook his head, “Go home and clean up,” He signaled you to grab your things, “I’ll close up,”

Scattered, you thanked him and reached for your rucksack.

“Wait,” Your manager handed you an envelope, “Some guy left you a tip.” 

Who gives a tip in an envelope? You eyed it cautiously. 

You waited until you had turned a corner before you used your fingernail to pry apart the sealed envelope.

Inside was a one-hundred-dollar bill, your black ribbon, and a napkin that read 'Thanks for your service’. 

Taeyong kept his distance, hiding in the shadows. He watched you leave the bar, with your hand holding some paper towels to your neck. You use the other hand to tear open the envelope he’d left for you.

To his surprise, you barely acknowledged the bill—you were more interested in the black ribbon and the napkin. You stared at the napkin for a couple of minutes, your teeth grinding. You then scrunched it into a ball, throwing it onto the sidewalk with the envelope containing the hundred. You, however, kept the black ribbon.

Taeyong observed you as you slowly pulled the paper towels away, revealing a dark scar that wrapped around your neck... It was as if someone had strangled you with barbed wire. 

A flood of emotions went through him, sympathy, guilt, and finally, coldness. He couldn’t help but remember a young girl who had experienced a similar fate.

You had died many years ago. Or at least he thought so…

NETWORKS: -​

MONI’S NOTE: Woah! I cannot express how excited I am to dive back into this world. For those who don't know, this is an old fic of mine that I wrote like 5 years?! ago. I've decided to rework it and improve the story (also finally give it an ending). I would much appreciate your thoughts, comments, reblogs and likes are extremely valued.

TAGLIST: Let me know if you'd like to be added to this taglist!

© softsan - all rights reserved. please do not repost on any social media sites, translate, or modify any of my works.

[coochiequeens]

Wait Ben was unhappy with his marriage but made a decision to stay because he had kids. He decided to cope by drinking, around his kids. Now that he’s sober and dating JLo he’s throwing shade at the woman who tried to help him.

Ben Affleck is more candid than ever in his latest appearance on The Howard Stern Show.

On Tuesday, Dec. 14, the Tender Bar actor spoke to Howard Stern about his divorce from Jennifer Garner and the impact it had on their three children, Violet, Serafina, and Samuel, saying, "Part of why I started drinking was because I was trapped."

Ben said that his and Jennifer's 2017 divorce was a long time coming, but they stayed together as long as they did for the sake of their children.

"I was like, ‘I can't leave because of my kids, but I'm not happy, what do I do?' And what I did was [I] drank a bottle of scotch and fell asleep on the couch, which turned out not to be the solution," he explained, adding that they eventually realized they didn't want their relationship to "be the model that our kids see of marriage."

And while Ben and Jennifer were no longer in love, he said it wasn't the dramatic breakup that was portrayed in the media. As he put it, "We had a marriage that didn't work. This happens. She's somebody I love and respect, but to whom I shouldn't be married any longer."

"We did it amicably. We did our best. Did we have moments of tension? Did we have disagreements over custody? Was stuff difficult for us? Did we get angry?" he continued. "Yes, but fundamentally it was always underpinned with a respect."

Ben added that he "knew she was a good mom" and "hoped" she felt the same towards him.

But it was his children's view of him that he was most concerned about, sharing that he knew it was time to seek help for his addiction "when I felt as if it impacted them."

"The cure for addiction is suffering, you suffer enough that something inside you goes, ‘I'm done,'" he said of the decision. "I'm lucky because I hit that point before I lost the things that were most important. Not my career or money—it was my relationship with my kids."

And he believes that if he was still with Jennifer, he would "probably still be drinking."

Now that the actor is sober and divorced, he said that he's "not cured" but he has "not wanted to drink once."

But it wasn't just his drinking that impacted his kids. Ben said that he is considerate of his personal relationships and the attention they draw to his children's lives, acknowledging that his romance with Jennifer Lopez is a topic of interest for the public.

[sunlight-moonrise]

The Law of Attraction (Reid Imagine)

Summary: Reader cannot understand how Spencer is in a relationship with someone who is his complete opposite. 

A/N: Hello Everyone!!! Here’s another story from the secret-fic-swap in the Discord server. I tried my hand at a new genre and I like how it came out. A big thank you to @imagining-in-the-margins​ for helping me make this real nice for y’all (this story was also written to her). Enjoy!

Category: Hurt/Comfort

Content Warnings: If you’re a fan of Max or Maxcer, this may not be the story for you. Sacrifices needed to be made for this story to be told. 

Word Count: 4.2K

Masterlist

The thought that the concept of ‘opposites attract’ was only true when it comes to physics. After all, the comparison of people to magnets doesn’t make any sense. If two people are together, there should be some similarities to build an established relationship, right? Without that foundation, the structure will surely crumble back into the fragmented pieces that created it, leaving them cracked and weaker for it.

Compatibility is necessary, yet there is none whenever I look at them. This is the fourth function that he has brought her to, and with each event, I find it harder to look their way. But when I do find them among the crowd, I can’t look away. Like a car crash or thunderstorm ripping tree roots from the ground.

It doesn’t make sense to me, why on earth would Spencer Reid be with a girl like her.

“If you keep staring at her, she might drop dead,” said a sarcastic voice, breaking me out of my reverie. I turned to see Tara with an amused smile occupying her face.

“I just don’t get it,” I mumbled, focusing my attention on the drink in my hand.

“What’s not to get?” she asked, glancing over at the couple in question. “They seem cute together.”

“They have nothing in common. He might as well be talking to some random person in this bar.”

I chugged the remainder of my beverage with desperate hope that the alcohol will somehow make things better in this situation. It didn’t.

“You sound bitter.”

“I am not bitter,” I bit back.

“I didn’t say you were, I said you sound.”

I didn’t respond to her because deep down I knew she was right. I just fiddled with the straw in my now empty glass as Tara continued, “Look, they both like coffee and going to the park, that’s something.”

I couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped my throat at the thought.

“So do half the people on the administration floor, he might as well have a harem if those are the main qualifications.”

“So what type of person should Spencer Reid have?” she asked, an eyebrow arching up as she focused her attention on me.

“I don’t know. Someone who is family-oriented and loves kids. Someone who doesn’t judge him for his idiosyncrasies. Someone who listens to his rambles and actually responds to them. Someone who he can escape to when things get too tough. Someone who understands when to give him space but will continue to support him unconditionally. Someone who can challenge him and make each day exciting and interesting. Someone who can ke—”

“Whoa there, I didn’t think you were going to give me a whole novel.” If she thought that was a novel, then the rest of what I wanted to say would be considered an encyclopedia. The only one that Spencer would never read.  

“I just want him to be happy,” I relented.

It was the simple truth. Everyone deserves some sort of contentment in their life, but with everything that Spencer has gone through in the past, his happiness should be at the forefront. He always put others before himself. It was time that someone prioritizes his wants and needs for a change.

“And she doesn’t make him happy?”

Not in the slightest. 

But I didn’t want to say that. I was sure half of the team already thought, or knew, that I was infatuated with him. But I didn’t need to give them the satisfaction of a confirmation by talking about this any further. The looks that Tara had been giving me the past few minutes validated my belief that I didn’t need to dig myself into a deeper hole.

“Maybe,” I said, hoping to put an end to the topic.

But just then, I heard a laugh despite how noisy the place was. I knew without a doubt that was Spencer’s laugh – it was the only sound that would demand my attention that quickly. It was the one he used when he felt uncomfortable.

“Excuse me, Tara.”

I didn’t give her a chance to reply before I hopped off the barstool and made my way to where Spencer and his girl were as casually as possible. Jennifer and Penelope were also with them, and it seems as if the three ladies were doing most of the talking.

“….like kids someday?” I heard Pen say. I didn’t need to hear the beginning of the sentence to know what it was about.

“Ehh, certainly not. My nephew is a handful as is, I don’t think I need any more than that one in my life,” she laughed. She, of course, being the ever loving, ever annoying, Max. A quick glance at Spencer's face confirmed that he was bothered by the subject being discussed. If the rest of the ladies were a bit more sober, they’d probably have seen it too.

“Hey guys,” I interrupted, taking my previous seat next to JJ, “I ordered some water for us and some appetizers. Tara is going to bring it over when it is ready.”

Cheers and thank you were shouted across the small table, but there was only one face I cared to pay attention to. Spencer’s mouth was quirked in a sad smile that was meant to hide the discomfort that had already taken root in his heart like an invasive vine.

“Did you place my fries order?” Max asked, garnering my attention. As much as I wanted to ignore her, I couldn’t. I wouldn’t openly be a bitch to her, no matter how much she irked me. She hadn’t done anything wrong. Other than stealing the affections of a man I’d never actually pursued, that is. But I couldn’t really blame her for that one, right? I should’ve jumped on the opportunity before. It was my fault.

“Yup,” I answered quickly with a small fake smile before focusing on the wooden décor of the bar.

“So any plans for Halloween? Assuming we don’t get called in for a case of course,” JJ asked the table.

“There is this pop-up haunted house coming that weekend.” Spencer said, his voice laced with that childlike excitement that made my heart race, “It is near the annual fair, so I’m going to try and do both.”

“Awww, that’s a cute date idea.”

The table was silent for a moment before Max announced, “I probably won’t go. I am not a big fan of anything spooky or… horror. I’ll leave all of that to this guy.”

The table shared an awkward laugh in a poor attempt to lighten the mood.

“Anyway,” I coughed out, attempting to save this poor conversation, “you guys need to hear this terrible joke the bartender told me. So basically, this screwdriver walks into a bar….” and just like that, the topic had been changed.

Tara joined us shortly after and the conversation remained lighthearted for the remainder of the evening. We later said our farewells and readied ourselves to go back home. While I should’ve been sad to leave him, I couldn’t help but feel a bitter joy from the fact that Spencer and Max didn’t talk directly to each other for the rest of the night.

●●●

It’s been a couple of weeks since the last team outing. Rossi must’ve missed us, because he decided to host a dinner at his place to celebrate the ending of a long and tough case. No one was going to pass up the opportunity of free food and wine, especially after dealing with a bunch of cops and detectives with entire tree trunks up their asses.

I was the last to arrive, which was not surprising since I live the furthest away from Rossi. Krystall welcomed and settled me in while informing me where everyone was. What I assumed was a team gathering turned out to be a whole party. There were definitely more than two dozen people occupying the space.

Good god. 

“What’s all this?” I asked as I greeted Rossi in the, thankfully, empty kitchen. Because, of course, Rossi wouldn’t be Rossi if he didn’t take care of all the hors d'oeuvres himself.

“Krystall wanted to celebrate our anniversary,” he sighed, as if this ordeal was somehow troublesome. I had to roll my eyes; he wasn’t fooling anyone. We all knew that Rossi would move mountains for his wife.

Their love was pure and genuine, a perfect example of two people meeting again at the right time and sharing something wonderful with one another. As I reminisced on their beautiful wedding day, a thought came to my head.

“Isn’t your first anniversary coming up in a few months?”

“That’s for our second marriage, this is for the first.” Rossi simply stated with a proud smirk, as if it was standard to celebrate any and all anniversaries in life. I supposed that for him, it was.

“Why do I get the feeling that this was more your idea than Krystall’s?”

“Guilty.”

Classic. Well, I wasn’t going to tell a man what he should celebrate nor how to do so. I wasn’t going to ruin any opportunities to eat some fresh crostini.

Once I made my way back out into the main room, I was able to find my team within seconds. My eyes instantly landed on Spencer’s tall and lanky form. And I would’ve been excited for that, if it weren’t for the familiar woman standing beside him.

Max was there. Hooray.

Usually, I was able to properly prepare myself for seeing her. It actually, unfortunately, took a lot of effort to not be openly hostile to someone I dislike. It wasn’t something I was proud of, but it was true. Typically in a situation like this, I’d avoid the person all night. However, I wasn’t going to allow her presence to influence the night, much less stop me from spending time with one of my closest friends.

“Hey guys.”

“Ahh, you’re finally here,” squealed Penelope, “I already grabbed your favorite drink!” She stepped aside to make room for me in the small gathered circle before handing me the glass.

“So what did I miss?”

They all caught me up on the harmless gossip circulating around the office and the new happenings emerging in everyone’s lives. Everything was going well until I heard the next words from Max, words that felt like a bucket of ice water and lead being poured over my head.

“Well, Spencer and I are moving in together.”

Time slowed down, I was sure it had. Because I was able to gauge everything in a matter of seconds. Tara’s concerning glance my way, her hand reaching out and retreating as if to hold me. Penelope’s joyful appearance over the news, her arms rising quickly causing her wine to slightly spill on Rossi’s floor. Matt expressing congratulations as he roughly patted Spencer on the back.

And Spencer….

Spencer looked like he rather be anywhere but here. His lips were drawn in a too tight smile that I knew was far from authentic. He was tapping his heel against the floor and wringing his hands together.

If this was merry news from the two of them, why did he look like he swallowed a spiked fruit?

The loud clanging of metal against glass brought everyone’s attention to the noisy source. Time returned back to its normal pace at Rossi’s call, thanking everyone for joining in on the celebration and announcing that the food was ready in the dining room.

While everyone cheered and made their way towards the ornate display, I headed to the balcony. It was too hot, too stuffy, too loud inside the house. There was one too many people there.

As soon as I passed through the double doors, I took a deep breath of cool, refreshing air. Everything around me felt muffled. Like I had stumbled into a small pocket universe that only differed from ours by a few notches on the volume knob.

I was thinking too many things, and none of them adding up or making sense in my head. How do you move in with someone you’ve only known for such a short amount of time? What was he going to do with his apartment? With his personal belongings that were scattered and settled on crowded shelves? Why did he look so uncomfortable when she announced it? Did he not want us to know? Did he want to say it himself?

“What are you doing out here?”

As if being brought back to reality by the very same hypnotist who enchanted me in the first place, I became aware that I was not the only one on the balcony. I turned to look at Spencer, taking in his disheveled and tired appearance.

“I just needed some space. I was feeling a bit crowded.” It wasn’t a lie, but my companion and I both knew there was a lot more than just that. Trying to keep the attention off me, I asked, “What are you doing here?”

“Checking on you. I saw you come out here dressed like that and wondered what would drag you out into the freezing cold.”

Now that he mentioned it, the breeze was hitting hard. I didn’t notice my body trembling until now. It is funny how you can’t feel much when lost in your own thoughts. The pain was a welcome distraction, I supposed.

Spencer stood next to me and shrugged off the suit jacket he was wearing. I opened my mouth to refuse, but he gave me a pointed look before I could. Instead, I accepted the warm jacket over my body. The scent of cinnamon and spice immediately enveloped my form and I tried to hide the way my inhales grew deeper. Trying to keep him as close as I could for however long he would allow. He kept his hands on my arms, rubbing them up and down the sleeves of the jacket to instill some heat in me.  

“So whatever happened to taking it slow?” I asked bluntly, keeping my eyes on the interesting speck of dirt that had ended up on my shoe. I didn’t feel bad about getting to the point -- There was no way I could subtly ask him what the deal was, and I’d rather not beat around the bush.

“Well, after the whole situation that happened, sh— we decided to pick up the pace of things,” he spoke lowly, as if he was unsure of the words coming out of his mouth.

“Has she even met Diana? Or know about her?” I instantly regretted asking, the angry look he shot my way had me feeling remorseful. But it also answered my question.

Max only knew the surface level of Spencer. She wasn’t aware of all the good, bad, beautiful, and ugly layers that comes with a man like him. She wasn’t the only one to blame, but I wondered how a profiler couldn’t tell that he was hiding those parts from her because he didn’t want to share them with her. He didn’t want her to know, because the knowing made it real.

“I just want the best for you.”

His irritated expression dissolved into a defeated one as he released the breath he was holding.

“I know, I know. It’s just…”

He stopped talking, appearing scared to share his opinions and feelings with me before he remembered that, unlike Max, he never had to hide things from me. He didn’t want to.

“It’s just…” I prodded, hoping he would continue with what he was going to say.

But he just stayed stuck there, opening and closing his mouth multiple times. I could practically see the cogs in his brain whirling as he properly tried to explain. “Well, the thing is that Ma—”

“Spencer?”

We sharply turned our heads to see Max and Tara staring at us. It wasn’t until that moment that I remembered our position. With Spencer’s hands rubbing tenderness heat onto my arms, his jacket over my shoulders and our bodies pressed together to keep warm.

It would be one thing if everything was settled, but this situation was anything but. Max had every reason to be angry. This wasn’t a new thing to her. So when she turned around, she stomped away fueled by the belief that she’d nearly caught her boyfriend committing adultery. Again.

“Fuck,” I heard the man in front of me whisper as he released me back into the cold night.

Still, as he left, he looked back at me. His eyes burned into mine up until he tore them away, making his final decision and hastily running from the balcony. Away from me. Towards her.

Tara and I shared the silence, but she looked at me with those inquisitive eyes, as if I was a client seeking out therapy from her.  

“What?” I hissed, “We were just talking.” I refused to feel guilty over something that I didn’t do. If anyone had done anything, it was Spencer. But at the same time, I didn’t think he was entirely wrong, either.  

“I didn’t say anything,” she muttered, holding her hands up high as a sign of surrender.

“You didn’t have to, I can feel the judgment from here.”

“Look, I’m not judging you. But I do want you to put yourself in Max’s shoes. You guys were gone for a while and she finds you two all over each other.”

“What are you talking about, Tara? Christ, it’s not like I was fucking him on the balcony!”

Although I didn’t intend for my words to be humorous, Tara laughed. I was conflicted on whether it was at me or with me, but it ended up amounting to nothing, anyway.

“Look, the night is young and you need to relax. Come back inside, enjoy the party, and don’t let them bring you down. At least for the next few hours.”

She was right, as she usually was. It was why I usually sought her out as the voice of reason; I knew that despite everything, she would always have my best interest at heart.

“Okay,” I agreed before following her back into the chaotic fray.

I heeded her advice and avoided the couple for the remainder of the night. Shockingly, it was pretty easy, but I was sure it was because they were avoiding me too. There were times, lots of times, where Spencer and I made eye contact, but we’d just as quickly look away, as if we were ashamed of what we have done.

All we did was talk. So why did it feel like something more?

There were also times when I made eye contact with Max, but instead of shame, there was anger and contempt. If looks could kill, like Tara had suggested, I was sure my heart would have given out.

It wasn’t until later in the evening that I saw Max take a cab home while Spencer was still inside the house. No one else but me noticed that they didn’t leave the party together.

●●●

I hadn’t seen Spencer since the incident at Rossi’s a few weeks ago. He had to take his mandatory sabbatical leave and I had to take an abrupt trip back home. What used to be almost daily texts between us became nonexistent in a matter of hours. It was a terrible predicament that I was hoping to fix soon.

As I arrived, I spotted him at his desk. For a long time, I stood there staring at him. If he wasn’t nose deep in a bunch of files, I was sure he would’ve seen me, too. I contemplated on how I should go up to him, but nothing I could think of was good enough to say. 

Hey, I have your jacket, I took it to the dry cleaner’s, so it is all clean. Rid of me like you wanted to be. 

Hi, how were the lectures this time around? Still have a bunch of teens crushing on you?

What’s up, it’s been a while, do you want to get lunch during the break?

I hated that things were awkward, even though I was pretty sure that I was the only one that was making it so. I should have just gone up to him, greeted him, and acted like everything was normal, because everything was normal. Right?

Just when I was about to do so, Emily called us in for a meeting. Impeccable timing.

We had a serial killer case in Louisville, Kentucky. My situation with Spencer was going to the backburner.

During our stay in Louisville, Spencer and I barely interacted. We exchanged notes and passed long messages, but that’s pretty much it. I wasn’t surprised. Our specialties don’t really correlate when we are working on a case. Anytime I did catch some free time, I’d look his way, longing for the opportunity to speak to him. He didn’t look back.

Then, just as the case ended, another chance presented itself. After five days of hardly any proper rest, we finally found the unsub. Everyone was in their respective room catching up on some much needed sleep. Except for Spencer, whose gangly body was tucked away at the bar by himself, a glass of what appeared to be soda in front of him.

Silently, I took the seat next to him, and for a few minutes, everything was quiet. But unlike the usual, comfortable quiet, it was torturous.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

I stared at him, letting the silent communication denote the fact that I knew he was lying to me. Spencer released a sigh and looked at me with eyes more intoxicating than any whiskey that shared their color.

“Actually, no, I’m not okay.”

I was going to ask him what was wrong or if there was anything I could do to help, but before I had the chance to do so, he hastily answered the question I hadn’t asked.

“Max and I broke up.”

I stared at him, my face and mind blank as I tried to comprehend what he’d said. That Max and Spencer broke up. They were no longer together. Spencer was single.

I thought that if this ever happened, I would be happy, elated, jumping at the chance to take her place by his side. But I felt none of those things.

“What happened?” I didn’t want to appear nosy or meddlesome, but I needed to know.

“We were fighting a lot, and I couldn’t take it.”

“Oh.”

“We were… actually fighting about you.”

I sharply turned my head at him, both intrigued and disturbed by the implication that I had anything to do with the failure of their relationship.

“What? What about me?”

“She thought I liked you,” he said while staring straight back at me, daring me to scan through each fleck of gold and green to ensure that he was telling the truth. But his hazel eyes expressed nothing but honesty as he continued, “and she was right. I do.”

“Y-you do?”

All he could do was nod his head, lifting his hand and catching a loose strand of hair before tucking it behind my ear.

“Can I try something?” Spencer shyly requested.

Once again, the universe felt different. I held my breath, trying to wake from the dream. Although he didn’t say it, I had an idea of what he wanted. If the hand on the side of my face and the staring at my lips were anything to go by, I knew what was going to happen next.

I nodded back and closed my eyes. A few seconds passed, the sweetest kind of anticipation. But then I felt the gentle pressure of his lips against my own, sweet and tender. He moved his head to get a better angle while I brought my hands up to cup his face. The roughness of his stubble against the tip of my fingers was a perfect contrast to the softness of him. I could taste the soda he was drinking on his tongue and breathed in the cinnamon scent that seemed sunken into his skin.

When we pulled away, it was full of hesitation. All it took was one look for us to know we couldn’t do this. Not now, not yet. He was still healing from the recent break up and I didn’t want to be a rebound. I didn’t want us to resent one another for jumping into a relationship so soon. We weren’t ready.

We sat there in relative silence, taking in everything that has happened.

“Maybe one day,” he paused “one day we can give it a chance.”

“Yes. I’d like that.” I beamed at him, “And I look forward to that day. Until then, we remain as friends.”

He returned my smile and I realized that it had been a while since I’ve seen his real smile. I missed it so much.

“Friends,” he confirmed.

And for the first time in a long time, I felt relief and comfort. Because I knew everything was going to be okay. I had hope that someday Spencer will get the happily ever after he deserves and he’ll get it with me by his side. One day.

[ssa-dg]

Undercover Part 1

part 1, part 2

Overview: the BAU has gone undercover to find a potential unsub who has been drugging, raping and murdering women. It own becomes a potential victim. Having to play her part to catch the bad guy, you go to the party all dressed up and dance with a potential murderer all while pretending he is someone else, Spencer Reid.

TW: drugs, rape (it is mentioned how the unsub rapes his victims. the reader is drugged and the unsub takes advantage of her being drugged and begins to take off her dress), murder, sex, adult themes. if these types of things are triggering for you please don’t read. I’m just a average person who tried their best to not cause people to be upset. If this is problematic I’m sorry I didn’t mean for it to be and will take it down.

Relationship: Spencer Reid x (female)reader

word count: 3,384

Author’s note: so this is my first ever Criminal Minds story. If it garners enough attention I will do more parts (honestly even if it doesn’t I probably will lol) PSA: I have never been under the influence of MDMA and honestly I don’t judge if people who do it consensually and safely (which is harder said then done). this is how I imagine it to be like to be on it. Also I like writing and I like sharing my writing because all of the great fan fics that cause me happiness, if I can cause that reaction just to one person that’s enough for me

You would do anything to save the world. Maybe it was a hero complex, maybe it was some form of glory seeking, or maybe it was the only way you knew how to fill the dark abyss you felt when you did nothing of importance. Being a part of the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit, helped with that. Being on the team gave you everything you needed, a family and a way to save others. Maybe saying you love your job isn’t the correct way to explain your emotions but you knew no better way. Although you wish a job like this wasn’t necessary and didn’t even exist, it did.

Your team meant the world to you and you would contribute almost in any way to help find an unknown subject. So when Penelope Garcia was able to connect the killings in New York City to some private “rich people” clubs, her and the team created a plan to infiltrate.

The victimology was specific. It was all rich young women ranging from the ages 19-30 who just moved into the city to find themselves.

The profile was an easy one to figure out. He was obviously a troubled young white male who was probably an heir of some sort. He was richer than what most people think is rich. He usually meets the victim at a high society social event. Then he’d take them to a more exclusive social event. After that he would drug them with MDMA, rape and kill them.

It was hard for the BAU to get much out of the enclosed and tight group of New York’s most elite families. So going undercover at an event where the unsub could potentially hunt for prey was what made most sense. Your jobs was to observe the women and men there and try to see if any of you could fish out the unsub. 

They had done it in the past but usually they did their best work by watching and observing. So here the team was, their second night in a row all dolled up in fancy cocktail dresses at some art gallery. Tara Lewis and Luke Alves stood around a table pretending to talk to each other as they observed potential victims. Jennifer Jareau, Spencer Reid, and Matt Simmons stood at another end of the room checking for the potential unsub, while your unit chief, Emily Prentiss, and you were pretending to be alone at the event eavesdropping on rich families. You listened to those around you while also scanning the room looking for potential young white men talking to lone young women. “Ten o’clock to the creepy face painting,” you heard Alvez say in your small earpiece. You calmly turned pretending to look at the other art pieces and saw a white male in his mid-thirties walking up to a female. He placed his hand on her low back as he leaned in to talk to her. Emily being the closest nearby out of you two, moved closer acting like she was going for some hors d’oeuvres. “That’s not him. He’s too drunk. I can smell all the alcohol he has consumed. He would need to be smoother than that,” Emily whispered as she took a sip of her glass. That’s how most of the night went. We followed and stared at people who might be the unsub and then filed them out. You felt yourself losing hope. You hated this part of the job. The one that made you feel like the profile was wrong and you all would have to start over, which there was never time to start over. Someone could die. That’s when you felt a hand touch the small of your back, your body tensed up immediately. “Relax,” he whispered in your ear. But you didn’t need to force it, because when you turned to look at the person who touched you, you were met with the face of beauty and your body instantly relaxed. You knew this was a dangerous reaction, as would probably many of Ted Bundy’s victims.

The man before you had slicked back short dark hair, bright blue eyes, strong symmetry in his facial features, and strong cheek and jaw bones. He smiled wickedly at you, causing you to intake a sharp breath. It was so sinister but also so beautiful. It wasn’t the most beautiful smile you’d ever seen, no that was reserved for your teammate, best friend, and love of your life (even if he didn’t know it) Spencer Reid. Now, Spencer’s smile was one you could get lost in. You refocused yourself to the beautiful man in front of you. “They say the artist intended for this particular piece to show trauma while he was drinking. His other pieces are other emotions on different drugs,” his deep voice rattled through your ears. You wanted to unwrap yourself from this man’s embrace. How dare he touch you like that without your permission. “Play along,” Luke spoke as he saw a scowl beginning to form on your lips, “he could be the unsub.” You smoothed the scowl into a smile. “It doesn’t look like it depicts trauma,” you responded dumbly. The man before you cocked his head to the side giving you a lopsided smile. “I guess it all depends on how someone experiences trauma,” the smile now wicked, and scarier. A shiver went up your spine. “Are you cold?” He asked, noticing it, while looking you up and down like he could devour you. “No,” your voice came out scratchy as your throat went dry. You cleared it politely. “Just thinking-” “About your own trauma?” He asked. You could hear the fake tone of concern. That snapped you out of your fear. The pictures of all the murdered women that brought the BAU to this case flashed before your eyes. “Maybe,” the smile you plastered on your face was a one you knew he wanted, a sad smile. You were going to play this role like it’s no one's business because you were here to catch a bad guy and if flirting with a creep got you there then so be it. He leaned in closer to your ear, “my name is Alistair Constantine,” you immediately recognized the name. It was on the list of potential unsubs for the profile. His family’s money was old, going back to the revolutionary war. The family seemed to always be updating with the times and never losing that money. You leaned into his other ear and introduced yourself.

Spencer’s hands were clutched at his side as he watched you interact with the Constantine boy. He felt in his gut at this moment, Alastair was the unsub. The way he was looking at you, it was like you were a quest to conquer. Spencer knew he couldn’t just come up, break you two apart and blow the whole investigation but boy did he want to.

Alastair paraded you around the room.  Every now and then he would talk to fellow members of the society. It took everything in you to pretend that you didn’t want to beat his ass right then and there. You were always an imaginative kid growing up so you blocked out the gruesome pictures of the crime scenes and instead pretended this was your life a young New York woman getting special treatment from a handsome man. It was easier to fit the rom-com role then what was actually happening. Alistair stopped in front of a painting that was particularly psychedelic looking with bright pastel colors. “This is my favorite piece by the artist. This was when he was on Ecstasy. Look at the happiness and distorted-ness to the art. It’s amazing,” he gushed. It would have been odd that he picked this particular painting to attach too, but it was a strong tie to the method of his killings. “Humankind cannot bear very much of reality,” you spoke out, breaking Spencer from his thoughts about if they had enough information to convict Alistair for the murders. Alistair looked at you funny, not understanding why you would say that. “T. S. Eliot” you told Alistair while Spencer whispered it at the same time. a ghost of a smile playing on your lips when you heard Spencer’s voice. “It’s what I think of when I look at this art. T. S. Eliot is one of my favorite poets,” you blushed at your admission. It felt like for a second, with having just heard Spencer’s voice, that you were talking to him instead of Alistair. Spencer was now looking straight at you two. His eyes held bewilderment, he has known you for years and you never once mentioned this, and he knew you knew this was something he cared about. 

“Indeed,” Alistair yawned. 

The next 30 minutes was you telling him how you’d grown up in Boston, Massachusetts, that you had no close relatives anymore, and how when your parents died their life savings all went to you (all of it true), the lie came when it was to talk about why you moved to New York City, what you wanted to do with your life etc. And he ate it up every second. You played the roll of being the lonely damsel in a big city trying to find the answer to life. You were his ideal victim and you knew that he didn’t even question how perfect you were. 

The night ended with an invite to the society’s ball tomorrow night, and Prentiss fed your ear a fake address for Alistair to send a car to tomorrow. You ordered an Uber to the address where Emily said they’ll pick you up to not seem suspicious in case Alistair sent someone to follow you. Once at the address the FBI’s SUV pulled up and you got in. It was Spencer who picked you up, which was unusual, as he never liked driving. You climbed onto the passenger seat and saw his knuckles were white from the strength of his grip on the steering wheel. It didn’t take a profiler to know Spencer was mad. “Spencer, are you alright?” You approached with a soft whisper. There was a pause of silence, Spencer calculating if he should be honest. He eventually gave into the truth as he knew that he couldn’t hide it from you. “No,” he growled, the anger in his voice causing you to jump in surprise. “No, I am not okay. That man is a murderer and he was holding you in his arm! You two were practically dancing around the room in there. We have put you in danger and now, now you are his next target, his next victim!” he hit the wheel in anger. You had never seen Spencer this angry before. Most times when Spencer got angry, he got smart and he used his logic to fight but now he sounded emotional. “Spencer,” you raised your voice, “I am not a victim, I’m an agent. I will do what it takes to protect others. Just like you.” In anger Spencer swerved the car to the side and put it in park. “Dammit, You don’t get it,” he yelled and turned towards you. “If he is our unsub, which we both know he is, I’ve run the calculations and the risk is too high for you,” his hands flying everywhere in gestures, “There are too many dependent variables. There isn’t enough for us to control. The probability of you getting hurt or,” he stopped to collect himself, and in a quieter voice said, “or worse, it’s too high. I’ve run the math.” Now that sounded more like the Spencer you knew. A soft smile crept onto your lips, then you quickly neutralized your face, in hopes he wouldn’t see the way his concern for you made you feel. And You couldn’t do that to yourself. You couldn’t let yourself feel happiness when Spencer showed you affection, because it eventually just leads to heart break. Subconsciously, you turned more towards him in your seat, “In your math is there probability that we get this guy and he never gets the opportunity to hurt another woman again?” You asked. Spencer gave you a pained look like he knew where you were going. You countered that look with one that told him to answer the question. He let out a heavy sigh, “yes. There is that possibility.” You smiled at him knowing you won the argument, “That settles it then.”

With everyone back in the small conference room at the police station, the conversation began about what to do tomorrow. No one was pleased that one of their own is now the target but there was truth that the situation was now more in the BAU’s control than before. Everyone also believed in you. They knew the risk and that scared them but also you are a Special Advisory Agent for a reason. Relief did not fill you but neither did dread, when you thought of the plan. You were doing the right thing. It didn’t matter if you were going to put yourself in danger.

Spencer kept pressing the heel of his hands into his eyes. Something that happened when he started to get headaches and you could guess this headache was caused by stress. As the rest of the team started packing up, you stared at your best friend hurting over the stress you were causing. You took a seat next to Spencer. He was still wearing his suit from the party. “We are going to be okay tomorrow,” you comforted him. He looked up at you, “I’m not worried about all of us, I’m worried about you,” he confessed. Once again, you knew these words shouldn’t have an effect on you like they did, but it did and this time there was something that felt hidden behind those words, something more. “I trust you not to let anything happen to me,” You countered and placed your hand on his forearm to comfort him. You looked in his eyes and tried to let him know that there is more than just trust there. 

The day of the ball, you got ready in the police station bathroom. It wasn’t exactly how you imagined to be getting ready for your first ball in New York City. You’d rather be wearing this gown for other reasons than going undercover to catch a murderer rapist. The Givenchy dress Garcia picked out was gorgeous (as you instructed her to get a designer to fit in the crowd and you would float the bill). It was a long evening dress in blue and green with a gradient-effect. The top had long puffed sleeves, deep V-neckline, and waist accentuated with smooth lamé and long flared skirt. You put your hair up in a loose low bun. The makeup you did was a smooth eye with long flair eyeliner. You put a heavy amount of glow highlighter on your cheek bones and collar bones to accentuate the deep v cut the dress. 

You felt ridiculous walking out of the bathroom into the police station wearing your dress. But the way Spencer looked at you was something powerful and intoxicating, making you forget your embarrassment. You strode up to him. A small smile played on your lips looking up at him. You saw him also smiling at you “You’re almost as tall as me,” he blurted out. You let out a small laugh, “‘I guess that’s what heels will do,” you smiled looking down at your feet. Spencer felt ridiculous that’s what he said. He should have told you how amazing you looked or how your beauty felt like the sun- always pulling him in and having his thoughts orbit around you. But he wasn’t good with voicing his feelings (especially in a room with his colleagues). 

“We are going to have Officer Melinda Jackson drive you over to the apartment, And stake out the car. She’ll be on the radio the whole time till you are in range with us. We will be at the Capitale when you get there.” Emily disclosed as she strapped on a microphone and earpiece.

You stepped out of the car with your head held high even though your anxiety was on another level. “i’m here,” you whispered. “We are here too,” Tara responded. Everyone disclosed where each one was to you. The venue was massive and beautiful. The ceiling was tall with ornate decorations. The lighting was a bright orangish glow. As you examined the room, checking each point of your team, you also saw Alistair. He was at the bar with what looked like to be a group of his friends. Spencer not too far behind them. You walked towards Alistair but kept your eyes on Spencer. He took your breath away dressed in a tux and his hair slicked back like he used to when he was younger. It felt like your heart was lit on fire just by looking at him all dressed up. He was staring at you intensely. It wasn’t that the world stopped the moment your eyes met his, but it was more like everything else just didn’t matter. You knew you’d have to look away soon to not give away anything but you took him in for just one more second. “You look amazing,” you heard a voice next to you say. You turned to see the ever good looking Alistair. He wore a navy 3 piece suite with a large Gucci tag on the sleeve, and a large Gucci flower pinned on his chest. You gave him a soft smile and returned his compliment. “I want to introduce you to my family. Their approval means everything,” he offered you his arm. You took it tentatively,  Spencer watched him lead you away, and he pondered on Alistair’s odd statement about family approval. 

Alistair’s family was everything you’d expect. They were proper and pompous. However they liked you, a lot. You fell right into the role you had to play. You stood there laughing and engaged in the conversation with his mom and cousin. 

“Shall we dance?” Alistair asked, giving you his hand, as your conversation with his sister came to an end. You nodded and let him take you to the dance floor. 

He spun you out and brought you back in close to start the dancing. You gave him a bright smile at his eccentric action. You closed your eyes and let your mind pretend it was Spencer holding you. You followed his lead as he twirled you both around the dance floor. “Stop dancing, we can’t see you,” Spencer frantically said into your ear piece. You snapped your eyes open. Taking in that you were on a secluded corner of the dance floor by an exit door. “You are special. My family, They like you” Alistair said with a sense of manic to it. “you aren’t like the others,” he admitted. His voice sounded different. It was sinister with a tinge of adoration. He pulled you close, so close that his fingers dug into your hand and back. You felt like your brain was freezing up in fear. How many times had you been in fear inducing situations and why did your brain pick now to not work. “you’re hurting me,” you groaned trying to pull yourself away. “Where are you” JJ yelled but then you felt mist hit you, and your mind begin to make things fuzzy, “the left corner, the spray…in the flower,” you breathed out, hoping the team could hear you. You heard a rattle of commands to your co-workers from Emily. Then it went black.

Spencer rushed through the crowd to find you but by the time he got to the corner you told him you were at, you were gone. “She’s not here,” Spencer panicked into the ear piece. “I just saw a black Tesla leave, license plate delta, alpha, hotel nine, one, two ” Luke informed them. “Call and ask them to run it”, Rossi said urgently. “on it,” Luke replied. “JJ and Reid, go talk to the mom and sister, Tara and Matt split up and talk to his friends and the other family members. They have to know where they are,” Emily demanded

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Rumor Has It {12}

Chris Evans x Famous Reader Uriah “Riah” Tyler-Evans

Warning: Plot, Cursing, Angst

Word Count: 4.5K

Summary: You and Chris have been married for four years after a whirlwind romance. You are both happy and trying to navigate marriage in the public eye while balancing your successful careers. In the entertainment industry, not everything is as it seems, the flash of a camera lens impairs vision. As scandal and flashing lights put a strain on your once fairytale marriage is it possible your Hollywood marriage can stand the test of the rumor mill?

**Inspired by a video seen of Chris and his co-star Ana De Armas on their press tour for Knives Out at TIFF where she kept touching his chest and face standing about five inches apart.

**NOTE: A WORK OF FICTION. NOT CREATED TO GARNER HATE OF ANY SORT.

**Loosley Edited/Proofread**

**Slightly Interactive**

Thank you guys for reading!!!! If you enjoyed this please LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG. 😊 ❤❤

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You weren’t crazy. That was the fact and no matter what you wouldn’t be made to feel like you were. Yeah, you understood he was hurt and probably disappointed that you would even think to ask him if he was being unfaithful after everything. It was his right to feel however he felt, it was also your right to feel the way you felt. Something was going on and you didn’t know if he was gaslighting you and leading a secret life behind your back, or if you were imagining things and this was all your insecurities speaking. You knew that if this continued your marriage wouldn’t survive.

 After Chris left he stayed gone. It wasn’t until the next day you were told by Jennifer his assistant that he’d made arrangements to stay in a separate room until checkout. You were hurt but you didn’t say anything. Though she knew something was up, she didn’t bring it up. You spent the next day apart while he continued work. When he came back to the room it was only to tell you that the schedule had changed, and he’d be flying out to LA sooner. He told you that you could fly with him or do your own thing. The way he spoke was so indirect, so aloof. It felt as if he were building a wall between you.

 When you tried to approach him, he backed away. If you tried to bring up the problem at hand he changed the subject. His annoyance was clear, so you decided to let him fly out and you’d find your own way. When you said that he hesitated and looked even more hurt. You didn’t know what the hell he wanted from you. he didn’t take the time to explain it either, he just left. You were keeping count, that was number two.

Thanks to the four-hour delay of your flight out of San Diego you had ample time to think about your situation and try to come up with a plan. You hated to think that bitch outplayed you and created an even bigger issue. Deep down you knew she wasn’t as innocent as she played, it was clear in the way she underhandedly set Chris on you by tattling to him about brunch. She could have kept it to herself, could have let it roll off of her, but she chose the sneaky route. This was a game for her. Before your flight took off you shot a message to Zora and Kizzy. It was time to get the Three Musketeers together, three heads were better than one.

 MSG: Meet me in LA. The Three Musketeers have work to do.

 The weather in LA matched your mood, dreary. The rain beat down on the concrete from the minute you walked off the jet. It was like a monsoon. Once you landed your phone went off with messages and notifications.

 MSG Chris: The weather isn’t so great. I tried calling to make sure you were okay. Maybe you should hang back a little longer to wait out the storm to be safe.

 It sounded like worry, but it could just as easily be him wanting to keep you away from LA for a few more hours so he could have extra time to fuck around.

 MSG Chris: I haven’t heard back. Call me when you get this Uriah let me know you’re okay.

 As you climbed into your waiting car Kizzy and Zora were waiting in the back.

 “Woah, how did you guys get here so fast?”

 “You said we had work to do. We know Three Musketeers is code,” Kizzy announced.

 You smiled. “Let’s go get that bitch,” Zora added.

 You busted out laughing and threw your arms around both of them. At least they didn’t think you were crazy.

 “I love you guys so much.

As the car drove through LA from the airport you filled them in on what happened in San Diego. The more you told them about Ana’s demeanor the more they thought she was behind everything. Both Kizzy and Zora firmly believed that Chris was innocent and that he would never do something like that to you. They were so sure about it you wanted to believe it too. You just didn’t know what the hell to think. The fact was he thought you were crazy.

 The three of you went through evidence over the last few months to either prove or disprove that he was being unfaithful. As you did you found new information, new pictures, and sly comments in interviews that you hadn’t even focused on before. The three of you were like Inspector Gadget on crack in the backseat of the truck. You combed over evidence better than secret agents and the FBI and came up with theories and theories for those theories.

 Once you pulled up at the house the case was closed, and the verdict was conclusive—or two out of three conclusive.

 “This bitch is scammin’,” Kizzy blurted out as you walked inside. Chris’ car was not in the driveway, so you knew he wasn’t home.

 “I agree with Kiz, Riah. Everything that we’ve looked at says she is doing this and controlling it. This bitch is trying to wreck your marriage. The posts are strategic.”

 “The interviews absolutely strategic. She is the instigator in all of them. your dumbass husband is being friendly. Unfortunately for him his friendliness always comes off as flirtatious,” Kizzy added.

 “And this picture?” You held up your phone of the picture of her in the “eat shit” sweater. This picture really boiled your blood.

 “Bullshit, but I cannot explain just how the backgrounds are identical. You said the room you were in for brunch looked absolutely different. It is not uncommon for hotels to keep their design aesthetic similar for normal suites but for the statelier rooms, I’ve seen them be different in unique ways. This picture is suspect,” Zora admitted. You nodded and walked into the kitchen and took out a bottle of beer from the freshly stocked fridge.

 “So, you two believe Chris isn’t cheating but this picture overthrows your theory completely. We can’t even come up with an explanation.”

 “Take a breath. I know it’s frustrating,” Zora began.

 “Where are they now?”

 “According to Chris’ schedule, he has the final junket in an hour at the Fairmount.”

 “So that means she is also there. Let’s go,” Kizzy said as she sprang to her feet and bolted for the door. You and Zora just looked at each other, confused. When you caught up with her she was already in the driver’s seat of your pink metallic range rover, a gift from Chris.

 “Where are we going?”

 “Where do you think? Get in the car!”

 You and Zora didn’t waste any time and hopped in. If you were a hot head and crazy, Kizzy was insane. She went from zero to one hundred in one second and when she was at one hundred it was known to stay the hell away from her, just like you.

 As you drove Kizzy went through the plan. Get to the hotel, maneuver through it without being seen, find the part of the hotel where the junket was, remain hidden. After that Kizzy went into two variations, one that was perfectly sane and the other was straight up stalker. No man had you go full stalker. You couldn’t believe you were considering this. Since you guys had the time Zora suggested finding different outfits. It was just like her to always find time for shopping. Her reasoning was if you were going to play spies then you had to look the part.

 Forty minutes later you were parked at the service entrance of the hotel dressed in all black. You had to talk them both out of masks. They were taking this a little too far.

 “So, plan A or B?” their eyes landed on you waiting for you to decide how crazy you wanted to go. Did you want to sneak around and find out what you could, or did you want to find her bag and sneak through it, phone and all. There would have been a plan C if you hadn’t talked them both out of kidnapping and scare methods.

 “Let’s start with plan A.”

 It shouldn’t have been so easy, but you slipped through the back of the hotel which led to the kitchen. The hustle and bustle of the kitchen made sneaking around difficult so the three of you did your best to blend in like one of the workers. That was also easy despite being mistaken for delivery men and having to carry in ingredients for the upcoming dinner rush. Ten minutes later the three of you’d made it to the service elevator rolling a room service cart.

 “Good thinking grabbing the cart, Riah. We’ll blend in for sure.”

 As you stepped onto the elevator you pushed the top floor button and waited. You prayed no one came on the elevator but after ten floors your hopes were dashed. On the tenth, six people filled the elevator which had you discreetly hiding your face behind Zora’s shoulder. Thankfully none of them paid you any mind. On the twelfth the six additions left the elevator but as you were pressing the close button a hand stopped the doors from closing.

 “Hold the elevator please.” A few seconds later a woman you recognized walked onto the elevator. Quickly you dropped down to one knee and pretended to busy yourself with something on the second trey of the car. You kept your head down hoping to stay hidden.

 “Thank you for holding it,” Ana said.

 You peeked up at Kizzy and Zora who had their heads dipped own as well, Zora had her face buried in a notebook that was attached to the car and Kizzy lowered her black hat and buried her nose in her phone. This wasn’t either of your first times stepping into Three bad bitches mode.

 “Come on Chris!” Your eyes widened just at the same time Kizzy and Zora both peeked down to you with their eyes just as wide.

“I’m here, sorry I’ve been trying to reach Uriah to make sure she made it through the storm. She’s not picking up.”

 You noticed Ana give her assistant Cora an eye roll.

 “Uh-huh,” was her only reply. Chris continued tapping at his phone. You felt four vibrations on your ass and guessed it was Chris texting you. Part of you felt good about that. He was in this elevator with her and you were the only thing on his mind. Ana cleared her throat loudly.

 “Sorry.” He slipped his phone into his pocket and looked at the two women beside him. “Where were we?”

 “You were going to answer if you were in for drinks tonight,” Ana mentioned.

 “Oh, tonight? I don’t know. It’s been a long press tour I really want my bed and some beer.”

 “I can deliver on one or both of those things if you’d like.” Again Kizzy and Zora glanced at you. The air in the elevator quickly changed. Chris made a move to look back and it sent your head buried deeper under the cart. He cleared his throat and pasted an uncomfortable smile on his face.

 “Choice is yours, I don’t want you to feel pressured. I know you enjoy our time together more with no pressure.”

 What the fuck is she talking about, you asked yourself.

 “I’ll let you know, but I’m leaning to not tonight.” The elevator doors opened, and he was the first to step out. You watched as Ana’s eyes dropped to his ass, it was then she let out a small moan.

 “Yummy.”

 You were seconds from jumping up and grabbing that stringy hair of hers but Zora’s and Kizzy’s hands on your shoulder pushing you down stopped you. when the doors closed again you looked like death.

 “She is bold, I’ll give her that,” Kizzy said. You dug your phone out and checked your messages.

 MSG Chris: Uriah I’m starting to worry. Please call me.

MSG Chris: I know we’re in a weird place right now and we’re both angry but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I love you. Just let me know you’re all right, please.

MSG Chris: I will always love you.

MSG Chris: No matter what.

Pushing away the influx of emotion that washed over you, you stuffed your phone back into your back pocket and pressed the open button on the elevator bank.

 “Let’s go.”

 The three of you stepped off the elevator and carefully walked down the hall that had several posters from the movie set up. You passed one of Chris as Ransom and you were tempted to stop and admire it, but you ignored it. as you passed each room you saw different actors from the movie being interviewed—Daniel Craig, Jamie Lee Curtis, Don Johnson, Lakeith Stanfield, and others. When we passed Lakeith Zora almost burst into the room. She had the only crush on him and if she had the chance she would lock him in a room and have her way with him. If you asked her she’d say it was only a matter of time before he was hers. You and Kizzy had to hold her back to prevent her from blowing your cover. She was not happy but knew there was a job to do.

 After going down the halls and peeking into different rooms you saw the one Chris and Ana were on. They were in the midst of an interview. You watched on and took note of their chemistry. You could see why they were cast together, but it was clear she did not know the difference between pretend and real life.

 You bit your bottom lip nervously trying to keep the insecure thoughts away, trying to trust in the fact that Chris loved you, and that the chances of him being a sociopath were slim. You were mostly convinced but when you saw Chris reach out and touch Ana’s thigh just above her knee you saw red. She reached out to rest her hand on his but he moved it before she could. That didn’t deter her though, she reached out and took his hand and hugged it to her chest with a wide smile. You watched the back of his hand press against her breast where her cleavage was and decided to abandon plan A. You were ready to jump to plan C.  Almost as quickly as she put his hand to her bosom Chris took it back and gave an uneasy smirk. You pressed your back to the wall in the hall.

 “Plan B.”

 “That’s what I’m talking about,” Kizzy whispered.

 The three of you waited for your window of opportunity. The longer you waited the more time your rage festered. Every time the interviewers changed you got a message from Chris. Each of them showed his concern with reaching you. You knew he hated when you were radio silent and to remain that way would have been cruel, especially seeing he was genuinely worried about your safety.

 MSG: I’m fine. There were some delays and a lot of turbulence, but I landed okay.

 You didn’t have to wait long for a response.

 MSG Chris: Good, I’m glad you’re okay. Let’s talk. I have a little break at four, can you come by the Fairmount? I don’t want to leave things unsaid especially after everything we learned in therapy. I don’t want to backslide.

 At the mention of therapy, you softened, a little.

 MSG: Okay. 

The butterflies filled your gut even though you were furious at him. You took a few breaths and tried to still them, but it was no use. He still gave you butterflies.

 The three of you hung around spying but didn’t get much. There were a few breaks where Ana and her assistant chatted, and she pointed out to her how sexy Chris looked to which Cora agreed. Then there were a few moments where you caught her clearly trying to interject herself to initiate touching. The flirting was clearly one-sided, you could see that. You knew Chris’ flirting technique and you also knew his friendliness. He was being friendly; this was not flirting. That at lease placated your rage.

 By the time four o’clock rolled around you saw your opening. Cora who was holding on to Ana’s purse set it down and went over to her to go over some things. It was within reach, so you nonchalantly walked into the room took it up and walked right back out. You met Kizzy and Zora in a janitor closet and handed the bag off then made your way to an empty room to face your fate. The banquet room was empty. You walked to the side of the room where a stage was and slipped onto it. That was when you realized you still wore the black beanie. Just as you slipped it off your head and under your ass the door opened, and Chris walked in.

The sight of him sent the butterflies in your belly aflutter again. You took a few breathes and held one as he slowly approached you. The relieved look on his face changed to a timid one as he got closer and closer. Once he was about ten feet in front of you he stopped and stuffed his hands in his pocket.

 “I was worried.”

 “I know. There was a delay with getting the messages. I didn’t do it on purpose,” you explained. Chris nodded while keeping his eyes on you.

 “Riah, I don’t want to fight.”

 “You think I do? I don’t want any of this.”

 “Then how do we move past this?” He sounded exasperated like he was at his wit’s end. He probably was.

 “Have you slept with her?”

 “No.” The answer was flat out, clearly spoken and firmly meant. There was no quiver in his voice or hesitation with his response. Everything from that pointed to him telling the truth.

 “God, since when do you not believe the things I say to you? When have I lied?” He took a few more steps to you.

 “I don’t know,” it was a whisper. You were quickly being overcome with emotion.

 “Come on dragonfly, talk to me.” With five more steps he’d closed the gap between you, but he didn’t touch you. “Please talk to me.”

 “You’re making me feel like I’m crazy. I’m not crazy, Chris.”

 “I know you’re not,” he began before you cut him off.

 “You’re making me feel like it. Every time I tell you something or bring up something about her. You throw up this whole defense. Why?”

 “Why do you feel so threatened by her?”

 You wanted to throw something right at his head.

 “I don’t feel threatened by her or any woman. I know women like her; I’ve known them all my life. I’ve dropped any of them that came in my path. With you though—you don’t see what I see and the more I try to show you, the more you make me feel crazy.”

 “Uriah. I am not sleeping with her. I have never slept with her. I would never sleep with her. I am not that kind of man. I could never do something like that to you.”

 “Do you want to sleep with her?” Chris took a deep breath and slowly released it. you were actually afraid of this answer. Telling you he wasn’t, hasn’t and would never sleep with her doesn’t say a thing about him wanting to. It only meant his self-control was high enough to resist what he wants. It felt like forever passed as you waited for him to answer.

 “No.”

 “Why did you hesitate?”

 “Because with that answer, I knew you wouldn’t believe it. I’m not blind Uriah, she’s attractive. Have I noticed? Yes. Do I want her? No, and that includes having sex with her.” He took another breath and spoke again. “Do you remember when I had issues with you being around him?”

 He never referred to Christiano by name, it was always him. You nodded.

 “It was like this wasn’t it?”

 It was your turn to take a deep breath. Roles were now reversed. Chris hung his head and allowed the silence to stretch between you. No doubt he was remembering how hard that time was for the two of you. He accused you and questioned you every time Christiano made things difficult. His whole goal was to get you back and he didn’t care how he went about it. Christiano had no respect for the fact that you married someone else. To him, it was all about what he wanted, and how he remembered your relationship.

 “Wow. Full circle huh. Shit baby if you feel anything close to how I felt back then—I’m sorry. I didn’t—I wasn’t—I should have--.” The words escaped him, but you knew what he meant. He approached you and reached for your hand but hesitated when you didn’t make a move to meet him halfway.

 “You can’t--, look I know you feel justified in doing what you did but Riah, that wasn’t okay. You can’t just corner someone I work with because you think we’re having an affair. You can’t do something like that especially without coming to me first. I never did that to you with him because I know the industry. I know how easy it is to get a reputation and a label. You didn’t just compromise our relationship, and everything we’ve worked through, but you also compromised my career, our livelihood.”

 Though you were still steaming mad at him, that part of his argument was true. She could have run to TMZ or some other trashy blog instead of Chris. She could have done a lot of damage. You didn’t think that far, or you didn’t care. You wanted to throw it back at him but that wouldn’t resolve anything. You learned a long time ago in marriage being right meant nothing. Chris dug into his pocket to pull out his vibrating phone. As he peered down at it he shook his head.

 “Damn it, I gotta go.”

 You nodded. Chris stared at you for a few moments before he turned and walked out of the room to reappear seconds later.

 “There is something I have to tell you. Something--.” He was cut off by one of the event coordinators who appeared at his side.

 “Shit, I gotta go. I love you, Riah.”

 The way he said it felt different. It felt—strange. You didn’t have time to respond before he was gone leaving you there to wonder what he had to tell you.

 When you found Zora and Kizzy they were still in the closet combing through everything in Ana’s purse. Once you entered Zora quickly averted her eyes.

 “Anything?”

 Neither of them replied. Kizzy kept her eyes on the phone she held, and Zora continued rifling through the purse. They were being weird.

 “Hello, guys. Did you find anything?”

 Kizzy and Zora exchanged looks and just like that your stomach fell. They’d found something.

 “What did you find?” Again, they remained silent. Zora could tell you were getting annoyed, so she spun to you.

 “Okay promise you’ll be calm,” Zora breeched. Immediately you went into DEFCON mode.

 “What the fuck, Zo?” Kizzy held out the phone to you with a blank expression on her face.

 “Take it with a grain of salt, you don’t know the whole story.” You took the phone and looked through the messages section. You read through an exchange between Ana and Chris.

 MSG Ana: I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened. I didn’t plan that at all. It’s just that I’ve been going through a lot lately. Adjusting to the limelight has been really weird and I’ve lost people I thought were true. I’ve been really lonely feeling like I’m going through this beast alone. You were being so kind to me I guess I got carried away.

MSG Chris: I’m sorry you’re going through that and you feel so alone. We’ve all been there. I’m certain it’s the actor’s right of passage to lose people and experience bouts of loneliness. God knows I feel lonely a lot especially during filming and press touring. I understand. It’s no big deal.

MSG Ana: Really? If your wife ever found out wouldn’t she be furious?

MSG Chris: Initially maybe, yes. It wasn’t a planned thing. You know I have a wife who I love so there’s nothing to worry about there.

MSG Ana: I have to say something without making it weird. You’re an excellent kisser.

 Your eyes stopped at “kisser” and it felt like you’d sniffed something that was automatically affecting your brain. You knew “Knives Out” had no love scenes with them. You looked to Zora and Kizzy, but they remained silent, so you continued to read.

 MSG Chris: LOL. Thanks, I guess.

 You skimmed the following messages but found nothing incriminating just annoying little messages she’d sent to him trying to be cute. You scrolled and saw another exchange from just before you began therapy.

 MSG Ana: Do you wanna talk about it?

MSG Chris: No, I’ll be fine. Just marriage is hard.

MSG Ana: If I were married to you I wouldn’t make it hard. You’d be happy. does she even make you happy anymore?

MSG Chris: Of course, I love her.

MSG Ana: But it’s okay to move on if she’s not doing it for you anymore. There are plenty of women who would treasure you.

MSG Chris: Gotta go.

 The more you read the more you hated her. Another exchange caught your eye, this was from when they were filming.

 MSG Chris: I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to touch you like that. I have no idea how I grabbed there instead of your arms.

MSG Ana: LOL. It’s okay. I can’t say that it was a bad touch scenario. I should say thank you. it’s been a while since a man grabbed my breast. I was beginning to forget what that felt like.

MSG Chris: I’m so sorry.

MSG Ana: Don’t worry about it. It was an accident, it meant nothing.

 Clenching your jaw, you tried to swallow the vomit that wanted to raise up. Zora touched your arm in comfort but you brushed it off. You were ready to call an end to this “mission” but another message came in. One from her assistant, Cora.

 MSG Cora: Everything is all planned for your night with Chris. All that we’re waiting on now is just his confirmation. Also, I see the video of you in his room made it to tabloid. Damn you were not playing around when you said you were going to take everything that was hers. 

MSG Cora: Let me know if you need anything else.

 Kizzy and Zora looked at you and the three of you had the same expression and you were sure you thought the same thing.

 “This bitch!” 

~~~~~~~~~

***If you want to be tagged please SEND AN ASK SO IT WILL BE EASIER FOR ME TO KEEP TRACK OF. Thank you for reading!!! ❤️❤️

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[tabloidtoc]

People, September 28

Cover: A Killer in the Woods and a Teen’s Brave Escape 

Page 3: Chatter -- Demi Lovato on getting engaged to Max Ehrich after four months together, John Legend joking about expecting a third child with his wife Chrissy Teigen, Kelly Clarkson on moving on after filing for divorce in June, Keith Urban on wife Nicole Kidman, Halle Berry on struggling to get roles after her 2002 Oscar win, Jennifer Garner responding to a commenter who’d asked if she was pregnant on Instagram 

Page 4: 5 Things We’re Talking About This Week -- Golden Girls gets an all-Black reimagining, Rick Moranis makes a comeback for an ad with Ryan Reynolds, Keeping Up with the Kardashians goes kaput, Franzia introduces a boxed-wine backpack 

Page 6: Contents 

Page 8: StarTracks -- Naomi Osaka won the U.S. Open final and sported face masks honoring Black people who have been victims of racial violence 

Page 9: Mariah Carey styling daughter Monroe’s hair, Shakira showed off a bikini she designed, Kate Hudson wore a cute cat face mask while she did some shopping at Palisades Village 

Page 10: Stars’ Best Friends -- Dua Lipa and Anwar Hadid walked their new pup Dexter in West Hollywood, Dennis Quaid was all smiles when he met a rescue pup on the set of Hallmark Channel’s Home & Family, Hugh Jackman strolled through N.Y.C. with his dogs Allegra and Dali, Ryan Reynolds wished his dog a happy birthday, PLEASE ADOPT, DON’T SHOP 

Page 11: Tom Brady’s first game for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in New Orleans, Russell Dickerson and wife Kailey welcomes their first child Remington Edward, Bethenny Frankel during a surf lesson in the Hamptons 

Page 12: Royals Back Out & About -- Camilla Duchess of Cornwall visited the Medical Detection Dogs training center where trials are underway to determine if dogs can detect COVID-19, newlywed Princess Beatrice stepped out for a shopping trip in London as her husband waited in the car nearby, Prince William attended a Police Service of Northern Ireland Wellbeing Volunteer Training course in Belfast 

Page 15: Scoop -- Katie Holmes’ hot new romance with Emilio Vitolo Jr. 

Page 16: When they announced their split The Bachelor’s Colton Underwood and Cassie Randolph said they’d remain friends but that is decidedly not the case -- Cassie was granted a restraining order against Colton claiming he showed up unannounced outside her Southern California home and placed a tracking device on her car

Page 17: Tyra Banks takes charge on Dancing with the Stars 

Page 18: Heart Monitor -- Lily Allen and David Harbour just married, Justin and Hailey Bieber happy anniversary, Jacob Elordi and Kaia Gerber new couple

Page 20: Tenet’s John David Washington on fame and family and a bold new movie, Baby Boom -- Alec and Hilaria Baldwin, Adam Brody and Leighton Meester 

Page 21: Kate Gosselin accuses Jon Gosselin of abuse 

Page 22: Passages, Why I Care -- after losing her brother to leukemia when they were kids Cindy Crawford is raising awareness about pediatric cancer 

Page 23: Diana Rigg 1938-2020 

Page 24: Stories to make you smile 

Page 27: People Picks -- Ratched 

Page 28: Micky Guyton -- Bridges, Q&A with Chris Messina

Page 29: Blackbird, Unpregnant 

Page 30: The Devil All the Time, Long Way Up 

Page 31: Antebellum 

Page 32: Books 

Page 34: Cover Story -- Terror in the Woods -- Jack Gershman and his dad Ari were off-roading in a California forest when they stopped to get their bearings and a stranger opened fire -- Ari was murdered and Jack escaped into the wilderness running for his life 

Page 40: Willie Nelson and his sister Bobbie Nelson -- she’s still my closest friend -- in a new book the country star and his sibling and longtime musical collaborator look back on their tragedies and triumphs 

Page 45: Regina King -- all hail the king! -- the winner of 3 Emmys and an Oscar just directed her first film and is loving every minute of being on top 

Page 48: Tragedy on the West Coast -- it’s like the end of the world -- unprecedented wildfires in California and Oregon and Washington turn millions of acres into ash forcing thousands to flee and choking the region with toxic smoke 

Page 52: Pauly Shore -- still crazy after all these years -- the ‘90s comedy star survived a career implosion and coped with private grief and now at 52 he’s ready to be his goofy self again 

Page 56: Lady Gaga and her mom Cynthia Germanotta -- how we healed our relationship -- the star and her mother’s new book Channel Kindness was inspired by their own journey from trauma to understanding 

Page 58: Gabourey Sidibe -- you’re lucky to have me -- the actress is feeling some serious swagger these days with a new movie and a live-in love and a blessed career turn 

Page 60: The Home Edit founders Joanna Teplin and Clea Shearer -- building an empire organizing stars’ stuff -- two Nashville moms had the idea that getting rid of clutter could be fun and pretty and now they’re celebrity gurus and TV stars 

Page 65: The It Gets Better Project: 10 Years Later -- I learned how to really live -- as a closeted LGBTQ teen Lark Doolan contemplated taking his own life and now as an openly trans man he reflects on the video series that helped him find hope 

Page 68: Kim Cattrall -- finding joy in letting go -- the former Sex and the City star is back on TV with a hot new show and ready to move on from the past 

Page 70: Coronavirus in America -- back to school -- as the pandemic continues to claim lives parents and students and teachers and administrators around the nation share their hopes and fears for this strange new school year 

Page 74: Country singer Lauren Alaina -- single and stronger than ever -- following two painful breakups the country star is embracing independence after healing her heart 

Page 76: The Fall family survival guide 

Page 81: Melanie Griffith -- what my life’s really like -- the actress opens up about finding balance and staying friends with her exes and managing all this group texting 

Page 82: Style -- it’s time to update your underwear drawer 

Page 87: Second Look -- Evan Rachel Wood and Gina Rodriguez in Kajillionaire 

Page 88: One Last Thing -- Ziggy Marley -- the Grammy winner and dad of seven is releasing a new kids’ album

[hogwartsstudentstories]

The Forty Students

So if you’ve seen the picture posts, we already know which is the main character, but…each one will have their own backstory. We figured quick short stories about key moments or moments of joy/anguish/pride/etc...are good enough. We want character and this takes place during Voldemort’s first rise to power, well...for the most part. It doesn’t last long though. We will definitely be doing a lot about their lives after school. So here’s a VERY brief synopsis of each character. WARNING THOUGH! If you click keep reading, there is a very long post waiting for you. You have been warned.

Nicole Bates: A popular and occasionally snobby young lady that enjoys wizarding fashion and music. She hopes that all of her hard work and studies in school will allow her to be the best in her career. She hopes to one day become a Healer at an institute such as St. Mungo's. She enjoys researching potions and one day hopes to alleviate ailments associated with more nefarious ones. 

Jimmy Birchwood: At first, a happy go lucky young man that suffered a Bludger mishap during a practice and is now stoic, cold, and extremely unamused by life. He’s currently Keeper on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. When not practicing Quidditch or doing homework, he can usually be found reading in either his common room or the library. Despite being an impressive Quidditch player, Birchwood would rather go off to be an auror.

Alan Bowen: A loyal young man and a Hippogriff enthusiast with a bit of a lighthearted yet rude streak. He still cares for his friends and plays Chaser on the Slytherin Quidditch team. He prefers to be with a small group of friends rather than a large one. He hopes to one day own a ranch where he can breed Hippogriff and teach people about how awesome they are!

Taylor Brown: A quiet young lad that just wants to stay out of trouble...please!? He sometimes finds it difficult to understand his housemates, so he tends to keep to himself or be with Olivia in the library. In the end, he just wants to work in the Dept. of Magical Games and Sports. Doing what you ask? Scheduling Quidditch matches. The games may be what the people look forward to, but without a scheduler, there can be no good games!

Camilla Conners: A young lady that enjoys Herbology and the occasional prank or two, and hey, throw Quidditch in there too. She plays Chaser on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. She always ties to cheer up her friends at every turn, no matter how she's feeling. She wants to open up a shop with her friend Jennifer. She's great at cultivating magical and nonmagical plants for her friends potions.

Thomas Denton: A young man obsessed with the creatures of the magical world and hates being the butt of a certain Gryffindor's pranks. Well, he isn't necessarily the target, he just finds himself in the way. He tries to figure out how to get them back, but his housemates don't want anything to do with those antics. He has an interest in Magizoology and hopes to be a valuable asset to the research team in Romania.

Jennifer Dobbins: Relaxed and ever ready to aid her friends, she's a passionate potions enthusiast with a heart of gold. She sometimes has small bouts of anxiety when she puts her homework off to the last minute (minus potions of course!) Her friend Camilla agreed to open up a shop once they left Hogwarts. Her potions skills are top notch and she wants to share a range of potions with the world!

Marsha Donalds: Quiet and reserved, she prefers studying alone in the library, but has an eye for ministry mishaps. Because of her knack for gathering facts on people, she also learned how to read other's body language. Because of her talent for digging through the news to garner facts about the ministry and other people of importance in the wizarding world, she wishes to become a Daily Prophet reporter.

Eric Felder: A cocky and conceited young man with a brash attitude and an even bigger mouth. Add in the fact that he’s a Seeker for the Slytherin Quidditch team and you have even more trouble. He has a rather short temper, so that leads to some unneeded confrontations. Eric wishes to venture off into the world of potioneering and hopes to one day discover some new and useful potions that will take the world by storm.

Weston Fitzgerald: A scholar through and through, he strives to be the best a student can be all while trying to keep his cousin out of trouble. After all, he is Head Boy and Ravenclaw prefect...it’s his duty! His cousin really knows how to press all of his buttons to stress him out. Weston loves dueling and co-captains the Dueling Club with Gregory. He wants to use his talents to become an auror.

Gregory Goldstein: A rather absent minded young man with a knack for dueling, but he is a gentleman and loves the Dueling Club he co-captains with Weston Fitzgerald. He tries to perform small acts of kindness to others to brighten up their days. He and Weston want to become aurors in the future, and Gregory knows that one day, there will be a time where he will be needed as one. He can feel it.

Stanley Green: Calm, cool, and collected at all times, nobody can stop this guy's nonchalant attitude and super chill personality, except Transfiguration...that boy is excited for that. Not only is Transfiguration his passion, but he loves Quidditch and plays Keeper for the Gryffindor team. He proves to have a knack for talking his way out of situations. Stanley however, gets tired of Quidditch after Hogwarts (playing anyway) and joins the Broom Regulatory Unit at the Ministry.

Jane Hosking: A fashion lover with an elegant air to her, but she'll still throw you a death glare for wearing that dreadful color combination of orange and lime green. Thankfully she won’t use her Slytherin prefect authority to dock points for it! She makes sure that her outfits are always perfectly matched. She eventually wants to become a fashion icon in the wizarding world and she will do it! SHE WILL!

Sienna Hunter: Need a hand? She's got your back. Sienna may not always appear to be the friendliest person, but she will gladly assist you with your homework...if she thinks she’s good enough at the subject! She sometimes cons a few people she assists out of a few extra sickles and knuts. Sierra has a knack for giving out sweet deals to younger students looking for some Honeyduke's candy and because of her prowess with money, she chooses to work for Gringott's.

Heidi Irvine: A sophisticated, and occasionally rude young lady that seeks to be the best. Even without meaning to, she can come off as insensitive. She plays Seeker on the Hufflepuff Quidditch team and has declared herself co-captain. She’s also Hufflepuff prefect. What more could she ask for? Because the talent scouts don't choose Heidi, she goes off to become a Healer at St. Mungo's. 

Arthur Jacobs: Constantly dragged into shenanigans, he just wants to plant things...give him a break please! When he gets that break, he can go off and play Quidditch with the Gryffindors. He’s a pretty good Beater and an even better Gryffindor prefect. He usually comes off as quiet and friendly. Eventually, he becomes a Herbologist, often supplying Camilla with some interesting plants he discovers around the world.

Matthew Jarrett: A young man that loves a good joke or discussion about muggle television shows. He often finds himself rambling on about the shows.  He’s a muggle born...what can I say? Often times, he thinks about what happens when he just randomly waves his wand and mutters words, especially the TV show titles. This curiosity led him to wanting to be a Spell Inventor at the Ministry.

Evelyn Jones: A chattery young lady that is intrigued by everyday gossip and a good story. Because of her expertise at crafting juicy gossip stories. She loves telling long stories that she makes up to cause a little bit  of drama. Evelyn wants to work for the Muggle Worthy Excuse Committee when she leaves Hogwarts.

Gwenog Jones: A brutal beater on her house Quidditch team, whose skills don’t get to shine as well as they should thanks to her Quidditch “co-captain”. She  often tutors some of her housemates whenever they need it, especially her Quidditch pals. She wants to play for the Holyhead Harpies when she leaves Hogwarts, but hopes that Heidi isn't ruining it for her. She does happen to meet with a talent scout for the Harpies.

Michael Kravitz: A laid back young man who gets lost and confused quite easily.  He likes to be around his friends and has found a liking for playing Quidditch, just not on his house team anymore. He tends to be a bit of a foodie, which causes a few food coma days. Dragons are his passion. He loves anything to do with dragons from their eggs, to how their scales glisten in the sun! He hopes to have a reservation for dragons that have been illegally purchased and abandoned as babies.

James Lawrence: A loud and fun loving young man that dreams of becoming a Quidditch player. He loves Quidditch and causing commotion in class...well, when he can...Otherwise, playing Chaser for the Gryffindor team is his life and as captain he wants to ensure his team gets to finally share in a win to celebrate together. He sometimes ends up being the tiniest bit of a sore loser when he misses the win by an inch. When he leaves school, he hopes to be as great of a sports entertainer in professional Quidditch as he is at Hogwarts and dreams of playing for the Montrose Magpies...he wouldn't even be upset by a signing on with the Chudley Cannons.

Katherine Long: A young lady that absolutely loves numbers. She likes to keep track of scores, house points, and well...predict the future with them. She asks everyone she meets at school if she can predict their future. Her love for arithmancy has led her to wanting to become a world renowned arithmancer, or at least one good enough to be credible in Diagon Alley.

Carlisle Martin: A narcissistic young man that can’t keep his ego in check and that just means he can’t get what he wants most of the time. He likes to think he has it all as Slytherin prefect and Slytherin Quidditch captain (chaser too), but he always loses out on what matters most. He tends to come off as arrogant, even when trying to just have a normal conversation. He has a slight interest in magical creatures many wizards would consider pests. He wants to become a top member of the Pest Advisory Bureau when he leaves Hogwarts. It's not the most noble job, but someone has to do it!

Carrie Mileno: A strict and rule loving young lady that hates when her housemates misbehave and lose them any kind of lead they had. She is a Gryffindor prefect and Head Girl. Why wouldn’t she try to keep her house in line!? She would much rather study or do her assignments than have to worry about being a "babysitter" for her housemates. Carrie has a knack for charms and counter curses, having been extremely well versed in Charms and Transfiguration. She wishes to become a Curse Breaker for the Ministry of Magic, a job requiring several talents.

Olivia Mitchells: A shy and quiet young lady that prefers studying and wand work to the hustle and bustle of the castle corridors and students, but as Ravenclaw prefect, she does do her duty! Even though she's on the shy side, she does her best to help the new students when they need it. She enjoys studying unique magic at the Hogwarts library with Taylor and hopes to become a Metal Charmer after her time at Hogwarts.

Hughbert O’Reily: A gentle and kind young man that desires to make the world a better and brighter place, and he wants to reach those goals. He tries to make friends in every house to prove that they don't need old grudges anymore, a new way of thinking is needed. Hughbert hopes that becoming an auror will bring about the world changes he desires. He knows the risks and would do anything to ensure the world is at peace again.

Brianna Parks: A mischievous and playful young lady that enjoys hovering around her friends to cheer them on...or to scare them...either works. She tends to be a bit clingy to people that she considers her best friends. While preferring the role of Chaser, Brianna decided to step up her game and tryout for a position as a Gryffindor Beater...and she got it! Despite her playful nature, she's an extremely gifted healer. She may have made mistakes in her early years, but she lived by practice makes perfect.

Arnold Reynard: An egotistical young man that highly believes he is better than anyone else. He fawns over his house and can be a bully. He’s still bitter that he didn’t get the Head Boy position, but is still content with being a top notch Hufflepuff prefect. Everything he does is by the book, one little mishap can get your house docked points. His knack for perfection has led him to pursuing a career in the Magical Trading Standards Body for the Department of International Magical Cooperation.

Rosalia Riverton: Studious, reserved, intelligent, creative, and elegant...a true Ravenclaw, but she is overshadowed by other students in popularity. She keeps herself in the know of different spells and charms she could use to help others. She often finds herself discussing new healing techniques with both Nicole and Heidi, making it her life's goal to become a healer despite all of the difficulties of learning every potential spell she could see on a day to day basis. She just hopes her talents won't be needed for a crisis. . .she just wants things to be like how they were...a time of peace.

Samuel Robertson: A bright and kind young man that has a fascination with how wands work and wants desperately to be a wandmaker to share his passion with others. Our main character that despite his cheery, creative, and loving nature, is often bullied for being muggle born and won’t fight back because of his conflict averse nature. Even though bullied, he is willing to help others, always giving them the benefit of the doubt. Samuel indeed finds himself craving the taste of adventure when he leaves Hogwarts. He plans on being an apprentice for Ollivander before going off to start his own wand shop somewhere. The U.S.? Australia? Canada? The choices are endless! He just hopes that he can see his friends again one day. He may not have had a lot, but the ones he did make left a lasting impact on him.

Lysandra Rowntree: A quiet, yet easily angered young lady that gets upset when even the slightest things go wrong. She always has a worst case scenario plan in mind. Usually, she keeps to herself and hates anything to do with gossip and rumors. When she isn't in the common room, great hall, or classes. . .she often finds herself tucked away in the corner of the library to research little known and lost pieces of magic. She has even found herself in the restricted Section on multiple occasions. Her goal is to become an Unspeakable in the Department of Mysteries. 

Shawn Upton: Cunning and reserved, he prefers to hang out with one or two at most at a time. He flirts with evil, but finds change along the way. He can be a bit cold at times and it takes a while for him to warm up. Shawn knows that he and his friends will end up far apart on their journeys to self discovery. He hopes that getting a job at the Portkey Office at the ministry will allow him to see them from time to time.

Brian Valentine: A hard working young man that believes that the magical world is full of weird and unusual folk. He isn’t the biggest fan of that. He almost regrets not going to a muggle school instead of Hogwarts. Because of his upbringing with muggles and his lack of normality in the wizarding world, he chooses to manage the gift shop at St. Mungo's where he hopes to make a hefty profit and live as comfortably as possible.

Kelsey Valeria: A dramatic and elegant young lady that wishes to bring her acting talent to center stage. She often writes her own little scripts and gets her friends to help her practice on the weekends. After Hogwarts, she hopes to become an actress for the wizarding world. Her intentions are to go to Italy to perform, but she could deal with radio dramas around wizarding UK. 

Freddie Veners: A muggle born that enjoys a good Quidditch game or two. He loves having a good laugh and enjoys moments of commotion. He’s the captain and chaser for the Ravenclaw Quidditch team...and he loves giving his best friend James Lawrence a rough time.  He evens plays pranks with Lawrence from time to time, much to the dismay of the teachers. Freddie himself decides that he doesn't want to pursue Quidditch outside of Hogwarts and instead, continues to focus on his schoolwork to hopefully become an Obliviator in the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes for the Ministry.  

Karmen Williams: A young lady that loves the music of the wizarding world and wants to bring her charisma to the airwaves. She practices her interviewing skills with Samuel whenever she gets a chance to see him. She hopes that one day she can get her own broadcast on the radio where she can interview new wizarding musicians and celebs!

Terrance Wilson: A young man that loves Quidditch and enjoys discussing the stats and scores. He can be a bit naïve and paranoid at a times. He never lets the paranoia get in the way of his A game though! He plays the role of Beater on the Ravenclaw team and adores every minute of the game. He truly wants to continue his Quidditch career after he graduates from Hogwarts. Terrance hopes to play for Pride of Portree or the Montrose Magpies. Even the Tutshill Tornados wouldn't be too bad!

Riana Wychwood: An elegant and refined young lady who loves music, but also has a passion and talent for divination. She makes sure to allot time for herself to practice her instrument at least half an hour everyday. She enjoys her position as Chaser on the Gryffindor Quidditch team, thankful her friend James Lawrence let her stay on the team throughout the years. Riana chooses to avoid prophecies when she can, choosing to focus on her music. Though, she plans to have a small divination shop to work in when the orchestra isn't playing.

Sarah Yielding: A happy go lucky young lady that supports her friend’s Quidditch team...when they aren’t playing each other that is. She often has to become the mediator between Gwenog and Heidi after the game if they lose. She plays the position of Keeper on the Hufflepuff Quidditch team. Sarah wants to open up her own tavern to serve the wizarding public and keep them up and refreshed!

Amy Zergona: A rule abiding young lady that wishes to one day work at the Ministry of Magic to keep her parents proud of her. Due to that fact, she prefers to study for hours on end instead of going on Hogsmeade trips or hanging out with her friends. Her love for rules has her wanting to become a worker in the Improper Use of Magic Office. If you can't follow the rules, warnings are required!

[tocinephile]

Ada’s Top 20 Films of the 2010′s

2010 seems long ago. It was the year when Netflix, previously a mail order DVD rental operation, launched its streaming service and changed our TV/movie consumption forever. Originally known for old favourites and terrible in-house productions, Netflix and its competitors such as Amazon Studios have gone on to become award season contenders in just a few short years. The functions of film festivals and movie theatres have shifted due to streaming services’ enormous effects. This decade also saw the warp up of some beloved sagas and series on the big screen - from Christopher Nolan’s Batman Trilogy to Harry Potter (more on those later!) Then there was an entire Star Wars Trilogy and end to a saga, which, love or hate it, was something many of us have been literally waiting our whole lives for. Throw in some Marvel at every turn, and an assuring expanse into the exploration of LGBTQ+ subjects, toss out Harvey Weinstein, and I think you have a reasonably accurate summation of film in the 2010′s. Something else close to my heart that unfortunately also fell to the wayside this past decade is Hong Kong cinema.  Once famed for slick neo noir style action with an eye-popping blend of gun play and kung fu, the genre has died to a trickle as the Chinese film industry evolves. Without (much) further pre-amble, here is a list of my top 20 films of the 2010′s, chosen based on personal preference, and what I perceive to be cultural/technological/cinematic significance, presented in no definitive order...

The Social Network (2010) I talk about the things that were different at the start of the decade, and Facebook was certainly one of them. Although still a top contender in the social media minefield, at the beginning of the decade Facebook was king. From the cinema perspective, this was also a David Fincher directed, and Aaron Sorkin written film.  These credentials aside, the film was additionally recognized for its editing, soundtrack, and transforming Jesse Eisenberg from the “poor man’s Michael Cera” (and what is Michael Cera doing these days again??) to a formidable dramatic talent. Altogether was a way to immortalize Mark Zuckerberg on screen eh? Inception (2010) Brace yourselves, I will tell you now that the 2010′s was the decade of Christopher Nolan for me. I didn’t realize until I compiled this list, that starting with this mind-bending thriller, every film he made this decade is right up there for me. Aside from its story, the stunning visuals, and pacing, Inception was cleverly tied together to give me one of the most unforgettable movie going experiences this decade. The Artist (2011) The best kind of homage here, and reminder that story and performance are what make up a good film. Is this an Art House film? Sure, but the story transcends even words, it’s a celebration, and a love story not just between two characters but to cinema itself.

Hugo (2011)

And speaking of celebration of cinema, does anyone really do it better than Martin Scorsese? In this case, an homage to a forefather of motion picture wrapped in the ultimate feel good family film. Seeing Melies’ films within a film, the automatons, and the blend of history and fantasy, make you believe. When asked to name a good family film, I often name this one. Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2 (2011) The final film of the series and also my favourite chapter. Deathly Hallows is a good example where the 2-parter turns out to be a good idea rather than a mere cash grab (as in the case Twilight).  It set a precedent showcasing the benefits of a longer story format that is enhancing for the story. Also, the Battle of Hogwarts, how do you get enough? Amiright? Super 8 (2011) 2011 was really the year of terrific family films. J.J. Abram’s Super 8 was no exception.  It was through Super 8 that I was introduced to Abram’s sense of adventure and wonder through his characters.  This was also Steven Spielberg produced adding to its positive attributes. When Abrams made Star Wars: The Force Awakens later in the decade, I was thrilled he was at the helm based on my love for Super 8. Moonrise Kingdom (2012) A different family film by Wes Anderson, and also one of the most endearing love stories told on the big screen this year. His follow up The Grand Budapest Hotel was also a contender for my best of the decade list but ultimately the unconventional young couple in Moonrise Kingdom versus the flagrantly over the top romantic gestures in Grand Budapest helped me make my choice.  Still, both are visually spectacular. The Dark Knight Rises (2012) Christopher Nolan film #2 and the close out to the best Batman trilogy. While a certain level of campiness has come to be associated with preceding Batman offerings, Nolan and Christian Bale did something different and in turn won over a lot of new audiences for the superhero genre.  While you can’t turn these days without bumping into a Marvel, etc. production, I think the quality of superhero films was raised leaps and bounds this decade and much of it in thanks to Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy which began in the decade before. Dallas Buyers Club (2013) Oscar accolades (and Jennifer Garner) aside, Dallas Buyers Club by Canadian filmmaker Jean-Marc Vallee told a important story and told it well. It also brought Vallee’s work to a larger scale audience than any of his previous projects, giving him the attention he so very much deserves. From set design to story to acting, I truly believe this was one of the best films of the decade.

The Theory of Everything (2014) I may be partial to biopics but there’s no denying the venerability of Stephen Hawking, and Stephen Hawking as portrayed by Eddie Redmayne... well, there are no words! Boyhood (2014) When I first began compiling this list, Boyhood was one of the first few films to come to mind. Aside from being directed by one of my favourite filmmakers Richard Linklater (who was also featured in my 2000′s list with Before Sunset - which I argue is still the best of the trilogy) it was also a very ambitious undertaking as a filmmaker.  It’s my hope that the significance of Boyhood isn’t diminished in the age of digital aging/de-aging technologies, to do something like this organically is a labour of love. To commit to a project that spends 12 years in production is firstly insanity, but then to have a finished product that ties so seamlessly together in a tale of family, life, and love. Who knows if this will ever be done again? Interstellar (2014) Christopher Nolan film #3. I’m not as into movies about space and time travel as I was as a teenager/young adult, so I’m of the belief that while I still watch a fair amount of them, fewer and fewer truly stand out. When it came to explore this decade’s offerings, Interstellar and First Man were the only two even worth mentioning to me.  The latter was more traditionally biopic-ish, though well told, and I maintain has the best soundtrack of 2018. Interstellar on the other hand had other thought-provoking layers (as I have come to expect from Nolan). What We Do in the Shadows (2014) And now for something completely different! What would life be like if Taika Waititi didn't make films? Mankind has been telling stories since the beginning of time so it’s understandingly hard to come up with truly original stories after thousands of years, and yet... Taika Waititi does it!  Seriously though , What We Do In the Shadows was the single funniest film I’ve watched this decade. Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) If What We Do in the Shadows was the funniest movie of the decade, then Mad Max: Fury Road had to be hands down the most intense, non-stop, adrenaline rush thriller. Again, I watch a lot of this stuff and find myself largely disillusioned or unimpressed with most of what’s out there.  Sure, I love the Avengers movies, and I’m always up for gratuitous violence but so few of these films will make me stop everything that I’m doing and stay rooted on the spot for the entire film - which I can recall distinctly is what happened when I put on this film on in early 2016. The Hateful Eight (2015) Westerns aren’t my cup of tea, but it’s common knowledge that Quentin Tarantino certainly is. When it came time to choose a QT film for my list, and we all know that’s exactly how I went about it.  Once Upon A Time... In Hollywood was never even a contender, it was between Django Unchained and The Hateful Eight, overall I appreciated the simple (but elaborate!) set up of a cast of questionable characters in a cabin that kept me entranced for near 3 hours just listening to them talk. Straight Outta Compton (2015) Ok, there’s a clear nostalgia factor in play here, but Straight Outta Compton was also straight up good storytelling, coupled with a badass soundtrack. I didn’t give it much thought until later, but there’s also a certain level of accessibility in the storytelling, it was a film that was made for a wide audience without sparking disdain from dedicated members of the rap/hip hop community (not much significant backlash that I'm aware anyway... As someone who’s been devoted to certain subcultures, I can vouch this is entirely a possibility.)

Blue Jay (2016) Who has no idea what film this is? Hint: go watch it on Netflix. In the 2000′s I included Conversations with Other Women in my top 20 list, I feel like Blue Jay is my 2010′s equivalent.  Not that I was looking for an equivalent but I have an appreciation for unforgettable stories about the undeniable attraction between two people who have previously had a failed relationship with each other. It's Sarah Paulson and Mark Duplass on screen the entire time, and it's completely engrossing.  Not an easy feat, not appreciated by many, but glorious to me. Call Me By Your Name (2017) This is my Ghost World of the 2010′s, not because the content is at all alike, but because it’s the only movie I watched repeatedly, and the only book in history that I’ve read twice in a single month. Some stories just touch you, this one did. Factor in the brilliant performances, the exquisite writing, beautiful settings, music, and every intricacy that together made up the whole film.  I only wish I had more pretty words to give it a proper description but I will never come close to what Andre Aciman and James Ivory and Luca Guadagnino put on screen. Dunkirk (2017) Christopher Nolan film #4. Dunkirk was the first film I thought of when I started to make this list.  It seemed so obvious. While I said I wasn’t ranking these Top 20 films of the decade, if hard pressed, I would put Dunkirk at the top. Not merely a good historical drama, this was a technical achievement. There’s a lot of articles out there about how a special plane was refitted to house the camera, you can read those online. What I think needs to be mentioned more often is astounding sound mixing and design in Dunkirk.  It’s so good, and I’ve been privileged to see it in 70MM and in Imax that I’m hesitant to watch it in my home with my dinky home theatre now. When they update the history of film textbooks, they’d better be adding Dunkirk. The Irishman (2019) Ok, so maybe this isn’t Marty’s best.  Maybe it’s a slight rehashing of his best work. (But his best is so good, the rehashing is still miles beyond the rest!) But to me, it’s Martin Scorsese embracing the evolution of storytelling in film, the formats in which it's presented, and how he’s going to adapt it in his favour.  What you have here is an excessive piece of work that would likely not ever have been made in the last 50 years due to cost, impracticality, audience appreciation, what have you.  However, in an unexpected turn, longer formats have come back into favour, and found a new platform in which to present themselves (ie. streaming servies like Netflix) So here he is, and here is The Irishman. There you have it movie lovers, more or less my top 20 films for the 2010's. Here is an abbreviated recap:

The Social Network - dir. David Fincher (2010)

Inception - dir. Christopher Nolan (2010)

The Artist - dir. Michel Hazanavicius (2011)

Hugo - dir. Martin Scorsese (2011)

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 - dir. David Yates (2011)

Super 8 - dir. J.J. Abrams (2011)

Moonrise Kingdom - dir. Wes Anderson (2012)

The Dark Knight Rises - dir. Christopher Nolan (2012)

Dallas Buyers Club - dir. Jean-Marc Vallee (2013)

The Theory of Everything - dir. James Marsh (2014)

Boyhood - dir. Richard Linklater (2014)

Interstellar - dir. Christopher Nolan (2014)

What We Do in the Shadows - dir. Taika Waititi (2014)

Mad Max: Fury Road - dir. George Miller (2015)

The Hateful Eight - dir. Quentin Tarantino (2015)

Straight Outta Compton - dir. F. Gary Gray (2015)

Blue Jay - dir. Alex Lehmann (2016)

Call Me By Your Name - dir. Luca Guadagnino (2017)

Dunkirk - dir. Christopher Nolan (2017)

The Irishman - dir. Martin Scorsese (2019)

Just missing the list was The Favourite - dir. Yorgos Lanthimos (2018). I actually miscounted my movies during the first draft of this list and originally had this to say about The Favourite when I'd mistakenly thought it'd made the list:

The Favourite (2018) This is the only film on the list that's not here because of its story.  It’s not a bad story, but plot alone wouldn’t put The Favourite amongst my favourites. (Also a part of me has yet to forgive Yorgos Lanthimos for making me endure Dogtooth) What makes The Favourite stand out is that it’s genre-bending, it’s like an absurd period piece for lack of a better description, and it’s awesome. Also the camera work including those panning shots with an extreme wide angle lens combined with the elaborate costume design really makes the film pop visually in a most wonderfully unconventional way.

Other films that didn't wind up making the cut:

The Town (2010)

Last Night (2010)

Rare Exports (Finland 2010)

Django Unchained (2012)

Cloud Atlas (2012)

Inside Llewyn Davis (2013)

Captain Phillips (2013)

Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)

The Danish Girl (2015)

Get Out (2017)

The Shape of Water (2017)

The Hate U Give (2018)

And two others I'd like to mention are:

1. Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012), which is an affecting film but admittedly will never be my cup of tea.  Doesn't mean it's not great. And,

2. Eden (France 2014) a personal favourite that I had not even considered for one of the 20 best films of the decade, but delightfully it showed up on a Vulture article about the best films of the decade in 47th place (coincidentally the writer's initials are also A.W. and this is what they had to say...)

There you have it, my decade in film summed up. I look forward to sharing many more film experiences and thoughts with you in the years to come. Our annual January challenge "30 Films in 31 Days" commences for another year starting tomorrow, and I hope to be able to follow shortly after with my top films of 2019. Happy movie-going and happy new year!

[ladystylestores]

The Persistence of Police Killings

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Good morning. A federal program to replace school lunches isn’t working. Facebook is OK with encouraging polarization. And four Minneapolis police officers have been fired after a black man’s death during an arrest.

During a six-month span in 2014, four separate police killings of African-Americans grabbed the country’s attention. Eric Garner died after being put in a chokehold in New York, while Michael Brown in Ferguson, Mo.; Laquan McDonald in Chicago; and 12-year-old Tamir Rice in Cleveland were all shot.

The killings sparked a debate about how to reduce deaths caused by the police. In response, more police departments directed their officers to wear body cameras. Some introduced new training programs. Civil-rights activists and politicians began paying more attention to the issue.

Six years later, however, there is no sign of meaningful change, at least on the national level. The number of police killings has hovered around 1,100 every year since 2013, according to Mapping Police Violence, a research and advocacy group. (A Washington Post database shows a similar pattern.)

Now the subject is back in the spotlight.

On Monday night, a Minneapolis man named George Floyd died after a police officer pressed his knee into Floyd’s neck while he lay on the ground. The case was the latest in which the official police report presented a different story from a cellphone video that later emerged. In the video, Floyd can be heard saying “I can’t breathe” again and again.

Four officers involved in the arrest were fired yesterday. “Being black in America should not be a death sentence,” Minneapolis’s mayor, Jacob Frey, said. “For five minutes, we watched a white officer press his knee into a black man’s neck. Five minutes.”

What, if anything, might finally succeed in reducing police killings? I thought it would be worth sharing a few suggestions from around the country that I found while trying to make sense of the latest case:

Samuel Sinyangwe of Campaign Zero, a group formed after Brown’s death: Restrict chokeholds, train officers to de-escalate conflicts and prohibit them from shooting at moving vehicles, among other steps.

A 2019 California law: Change the standard for when an officer can legally use deadly force, from one based on a “reasonable belief” of imminent danger to one in which a later review finds it “necessary.”

Jennifer Cobbina, Michigan State University: Implicit-bias training for officers and “frank engagement between law enforcement and the people they serve to address tensions, grievances and misconceptions.”

David French, National Review: Acknowledge that “many controversial police shootings are lawful and justifiable” but also stop accepting excuses and cover-ups for those that are not.

Chuck Wexler, Police Executive Research Forum: Train officers to intervene when a colleague “may be on the brink of using excessive force,” as Los Angeles and New Orleans are doing.

FOUR MORE BIG STORIES

1. Slow start for a hunger relief program

An emergency program created by Congress to replace school meals during the coronavirus outbreak has reached only about 15 percent of eligible children, according to an analysis by The Times. One problem: Outdated state computers.

Other virus developments:

2. Trump vs. Twitter

Twitter said yesterday that it would not remove Trump’s tweets spreading a baseless conspiracy theory that the MSNBC host Joe Scarborough killed Lori Klausutis, a former congressional staff member who died in 2001 of a medical condition.

Klausutis’s widower had pleaded with Twitter to remove the posts, writing in a letter, “I’m asking you to intervene in this instance because the president of the United States has taken something that does not belong to him — the memory of my dead wife — and perverted it for perceived political gain.”

A Twitter first: The company added a fact-checking link yesterday below two Trump tweets that made false claims about mail-in ballots.

3. How the Taliban endured

Senior military officials plan to present Trump with an option to pull all American troops out of Afghanistan before the November election, at least six months ahead of schedule. But commanders are expected to advise against that option, out of concern that it could doom the peace deal reached this year with the Taliban.

4. Facebook chooses polarization

An internal Facebook analysis found that the platform was helping polarize the country, but senior executives decided to shelve the analysis and not take action, The Wall Street Journal reported. One presentation given to senior executives warned that “if left unchecked,” Facebook would feed users “more and more divisive content in an effort to gain user attention & increase time on the platform.”

Kevin Roose, a technology columnist at The Times, explains: “It raises the possibility that these presentations — and others like them — will come to be seen as a smoking gun for Facebook, the way that tobacco and oil companies had known about the hazards of their products years before they publicly admitted it.”

Here’s what else is happening

The National Hockey League announced a plan to finish its virus-shortened season. The top 24 teams will compete in a round-robin playoff, likely hosted in empty arenas in two cities.

A white woman in New York was fired from her job after a video captured her calling the police on an African-American man in Central Park who asked her to leash her dog, as required.

Jimmy Cobb, a jazz drummer who was part of Miles Davis’s seminal album “Kind of Blue,” died Sunday at 91.

BACK STORY: SPACE LAUNCH

Two NASA astronauts are set to blast off to the International Space Station today. But it will be different from past launches: This will be the first one run by a private company — SpaceX, founded by the entrepreneur Elon Musk. Kenneth Chang, a science reporter, offers some perspective:

Back in 1968, Pan Am started issuing memberships for its “First Moon Flights” club to space enthusiasts hoping to someday book a commercial flight there. It was a fanciful promotion — the membership card was free — but more than 93,000 people signed up. Pan Am is long out of business, and we’re still a long way before someone can buy a ticket to the moon, but the SpaceX launch is the first real step toward that dream.

Although NASA has been involved in working with SpaceX, this is SpaceX’s operation. In the future, NASA will simply pay the going rate for a ticket to the space station and not be involved with running its own space transportation system to low-Earth orbit.

More: The launch, scheduled for 4:33 p.m. Eastern time, will be streaming live on NASA’s website starting at noon.

PLAY, WATCH, EAT, READ

Take a (virtual) food tour across America

Pepperoni rolls, cold noodles, New England seafood chowder — there are some meals that just taste better coming from a favorite restaurant.

Read a buzzy sophomore novel

Four years ago, Brit Bennett released her debut novel, “The Mothers,” centered on friends growing up in a small-town black community in California. Now she returns with the highly anticipated “The Vanishing Half,” about twin sisters who lead diverging lives, one as a black woman and the other passing as white.

“Bennett is a remarkably assured writer who mostly sidesteps the potential for melodrama inherent in a form built upon secrecy and revelation,” Parul Sehgal, a book critic for The Times, wrote in a review. “The past laps at the present in short flashbacks, never weighing down the quick current of a story that covers almost 20 years.”

Thanks for spending part of your morning with The Times. See you tomorrow. — David

P.S. The word “ervaringsdeskundige” — Flemish for “experience expert” — appeared for the first time in The Times yesterday, as noted by the Twitter bot @NYT_first_said.

Today’s episode of “The Daily” is about the threat that the coronavirus is posing to the U.S. Postal Service.

Lauren Leatherby, Ian Prasad Philbrick and Sanam Yar contributed to The Morning. You can reach the team at themorning@nytimes.com.

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from World Wide News https://ift.tt/2zALdYu

[theconservativebrief]

What do you get when you combine the raw charisma and star power of a budding mega-celebrity, a heartwarming melodrama about finding love and friendship in multicultural America, and an iconic soundtrack that spans everything from pop-infused traditional Indian music to Roy Orbison?

You get Kal Ho Naa Ho, the beloved 2003 Bollywood romance headlined by international superstar Shah Rukh Khan, a.k.a. SRK, the “king of romance” in Southeast Asia and beyond. Kal Ho Naa Ho, better known as KHNH to its fans, was released 15 years ago this week and arguably did more than any film before it to introduce the style and music of Bollywood to an international audience.

If you’ve never heard of Kal Ho Naa Ho, that’s forgivable. This ebullient musical tale of Indian Americans falling in love in New York City has often been overlooked in the annals of famed Bollywood cinema. But KHNH left a lasting legacy in a number of ways: The movie kicked SRK’s international celebrity into high gear, and its extremely popular soundtrack, which broke sales records in India and abroad, helped export Bollywood music to the rest of world.

In India, Kal Ho Naa Ho was the second-biggest film of 2003. But internationally, it scored an even more significant milestone: It garnered what was then the biggest overseas box office ever for a Bollywood film, opening in the UK top 10 and breaking box office records for Bollywood films in the US. It even kicked off an industry trend of setting Bollywood films in New York.

But above all, KHNH — which is conveniently streaming on Amazon Prime — gave us a heartwarming, hopeful love story that captured audiences’ hearts while sidestepping tired genre tropes in ways that are still refreshing today.

srkajolgif/Tumblr

The title of Kal Ho Naa Ho translates to “tomorrow may never come,” and the film’s story revolves around a typical New Yorker: clever college student Naina (Preity Zinta), whose family epitomizes Queens’s thriving Indian-American community. But Naina’s headstrong determination never to get married is diverted when her mom, Jennifer (Bollywood veteran Jaya Bhaduri Bachchan), prays for positive changes to come into their lives.

For Naina, these changes happen by way of her bashful, dorky longtime friend Rohit (Saif Ali Khan) and the brash but charming Aman (Shah Rukh Khan) — a recent arrival to America who quickly becomes a huge part of the community. Over the course of the film, Naina falls hard for Aman. But even though Aman is clearly in love with Naina as well, he’s determined to set her up with Rohit, who’s been quietly pining after his best friend for years.

How does everything shake out? Well, I won’t spoil the ending for you, but suffice to say that KHNH devotes most of its dreamy love scenes to the chemistry between Zinta and SRK.

crazybollywood/Tumblr

Along the way, there’s plenty of infectious music, singing, and dancing, thanks to an unforgettable soundtrack and classic Bollywood dance numbers like this one:

[embedded content]

Each of these elements was crucial to KHNH’s success — and crucial to its celebration of multicultural America, globalization, and true love.

KHNH was a deep collaboration between producer/screenwriter Karan Johar and director Nikkhil Advani in his feature-length debut. On the surface, it seems like your average Bollywood movie. It’s got a typical three-hour runtime — outsize in America but standard in Hindi films — and a typical romantic melodrama at the center of the plot. Like nearly all Bollywood films, it features lots of singing and dancing, balanced against at least one giant moment of angst.

But there’s plenty that makes KHNH unique in the annals of Bollywood classics and even among rom-coms both past and present.

For starters, Kal Ho Naa Ho really does feel like a rom-com even when it’s using the traditional structure of a Bollywood melodrama. In many ways, Naina is the typical early-2000s rom-com heroine: an independent, nerdy 20-something city girl (her glasses, rare for a Bollywood heroine to wear in the early ’00s, reportedly spurred a fashion trend). Though Naina clashes with her family over her determination to stay single, she retains a firm agency over her own life.

Additionally, though the film focuses on the love triangle, it’s full of three-dimensional female characters, and its entire plot is fueled by choices Naina and the women in her family make. Some fans have argued that because the role of Naina’s mother Jennifer is so central to the plot, and because Naina’s community is largely directed by women, KHNH in fact presents an onscreen matriarchy — a rarely seen phenomenon in cinema even today.

What perhaps makes KHNH even rarer, though, is the way it treats Rohit and Aman. Critics have frequently noted that the two men’s friendship is considerably deeper than their mutual love for Naina, but despite an unfortunate running gay joke in the film that lampshades this intimacy, KHNH never turns their friendship into something toxic or divisive. Instead, it celebrates platonic male closeness rather than shying away from it — and even better, the two men never allow their friendship to be threatened, despite the fact that they are in love with the same woman.

manchalaa-teri-ore/Tumblr

The final atypical thing about Kal Ho Naa Ho in the annals of romance is that the film goes out of its way to show Aman actively refusing to pursue Naina even though he loves her — which puts Naina in the position of being the one to court and woo him, something romance heroines rarely need to do.

kasumisuzuki/Tumblr

All of this could have served as the setup for a flare-up of deep conflict between the three main characters. But instead, Kal Ho Naa Ho constantly affirms the love and friendship that exist between all three of them, both as individual pairs and as a group. Refreshingly, even though Rohit is clearly the softer and less flashy of Naina’s two suitors, the movie never really positions either man as a “better” choice for her — instead, it presents them both as compatible with her in different ways, and ultimately never asks the audience to pick a “side.”

In 2017, director Advani discussed how unique the film’s positive outlook was in the annals of modern Bollywood romances. “It wasn’t a film about Aman and Naina or Rohit and Naina. It was about the friendship that Aman and Rohit shared,” he said. “None had attempted to make a film on those lines, and that’s why it was so successful.”

Though the meaning of the film’s ominous title ultimately becomes clear (again, I won’t spoil it), and though KHNH ultimately adheres to the rule of melodrama wherein even the happiest endings are attained through grief and copious tears, it’s difficult to wrest it away from its rom-com leanings. The film’s treatment of its central love triangle — and indeed, the concept of love itself — is the main reason for this. Kal Ho Naa Ho argues that it’s not only romantic love that saves us, but also a deep collective love among friends that transcends tragedy and helps us overcome grief.

[embedded content]

Beyond its subtly subversive storytelling elements, KHNH is also unique due to the role that New York plays in the movie. Shot mainly in New York and Toronto, KHNH drips with color and cheer. The setting is a key feature of the film, and one that was extremely important to its ultimate success in the US.

It was practically unheard of in 2003 for Bollywood films to focus on nonresident Indians — that is, Indian characters living overseas. But Kal Ho Naa Ho employed actual ethnic residents of Queens as extras, and depicted Indian and Indian-American characters as an organic part of everyday American life and culture. It even portrayed everyday American capitalism: A major subplot involves Jennifer’s competition with a neighboring restaurant.

Even within its depiction of Indian-American communities, KHNH is notably and impressively diverse. The film’s characters represent India’s own cultural diversity; Naina’s Punjabi family contains members who are Christian and Sikh, while Rohit’s family is Gujarati — a positive mix of subcultures within the Indian diaspora that enhanced the film’s feel-good humanism. Cross-cultural blending is not only accepted but encouraged, as are multiple approaches to love and marriage.

The character of New York is particularly moving and significant. Even though the movie’s production took place in late 2002 and 2003, KHNH in many ways feels like a relic of pre-9/11 New York and pre-9/11 cinema. It carries all the optimism and vibrancy of a city not yet reeling from a wound, set in an America that had not yet developed ongoing friction with its immigrant populations. Kal Ho Naa Ho wears its American character proudly, seamlessly fusing American and Indian culture into the background of its love triangle plot.

And underscoring that fusion is the film’s famous soundtrack, which turned artistic multiculturalism into its strongest selling point.

The KHNH soundtrack was written by the Indian performance trio of Shankar Mahadevan, Ehsaan Noorani, and Loy Mendonsa, better known as Shankar–Ehsaan–Loy. They were fresh off their rise to public attention with their previous film, 2002’s Dil Chahta Hai — but Kal Ho Naa Ho not only surpassed its success but became an immediate best-seller and an instant cultural landmark.

There are several reasons for this. For one thing, the film’s title track is a ridiculously earworm-y love ballad that croons throughout the film, reminding us that tomorrow may never come. The video for this song, embedded above, clearly played to the film’s strengths — it’s basically SRK making love to the Brooklyn Bridge.

The entirety of Kal Ho Naa Ho’s soundtrack is about fusion — mixing vintage pop and modern pop, traditional and modern Southeast Asian music, and different varieties of international music. We see this most clearly in Kal Ho Naa Ho’s unexpected but delightful tribute to disco, in a scene that unites traditional Bollywood dance with the joy of ’70s music and the New York City club scene of the early ’00s. The song, appropriately enough, announces, “It’s the Time to Disco,” and indeed it is!

But unquestionably, the film’s most American moment, both musically and on the whole, comes when Aman sees Naina for the first time. Immediately smitten, he expresses his interest in her by singing an updated Bollywood cover of Roy Orbison’s “Pretty Woman” against the backdrop of a giant American flag. It’s interspersed with scenes where Aman rallies a classic all-American block party, as a collage of diverse performers all break-dance in front of the flag, reminding us that America is all about multiculturalism and rock ’n’ roll.

[embedded content]

The film’s soundtrack continues to be remembered and celebrated today and is widely considered one of the most successful soundtracks in Indian cinema.

All of this reaped huge box office success for the film.

Most significantly, all of this was occurring during a new intense period of cultural globalization and communication. KHNH was a cornerstone film, in that for many people it was their first experience of modern Bollywood cinema. It allowed nonresident Indians to connect to each other and to the experience of being Indian overseas, while seeing themselves depicted onscreen in ways that made their lives newly accessible to foreign audiences. And it celebrated Indian-American culture onscreen in ways that still feel admirable and unique today.

Above all, though, fans remember it for the tearjerking romance at its center — and the reminder to always seize the day and celebrate love at all costs.

Original Source -> Celebrating 15 years of Kal Ho Naa Ho, the classic romance that brought Bollywood to America

via The Conservative Brief

[thesinglesjukebox]

SILK CITY FT. DUA LIPA - ELECTRICITY [6.54] Looking forward to future single "Magnetism"...

Thomas Inskeep: Diplo keeps on keeping on, but as long as Silk City is part of his continued output, he can do whatever he damn well wants. This collaboration with Mark Ronson is devoted to straight-up classic house music, and there's precious little music I love more than classic piano house. Combine that with the big-lunged, assured, made-for-dance-music vocals of Dua Lipa, and you really can't miss. This doesn't. In fact, by virtue of the fact that I prefer her vocal to Merriweather's on "Better," it gets a score one point higher. Which makes sense, because this is a perfect four-on-the-floor stormer. [10]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Diplo & Mark Ronson do their jobs adeptly -- they've been working since around when house music (and not just skilled pastiches of it) was last actually popular, and so slipping into the '90s aesthetic of "Electricity" is natural for them. But over their pulsating, piano-driven beat, one of those dancefloor concoctions that sounds like how dancing feels, Dua Lipa outshines them. While "One Kiss" showed that '90s nostalgia-dance beats were a natural fit for her restrained, throaty vocal style, that Calvin Harris track seemed more concerned with showing off his array of producer's tricks, chopping her up into unrecognizable pieces as the song went on. Here, though, Silk City's production has the good sense to let Dua run rampant over the entire track. There's barely a second of "Electricity" without her voice, which has a subtlety and emotional range beyond those of most of her peers in the new pop wave. That overexposure works dividends both obvious and sublime -- a line and melody like, "And even if I could I wouldn't turn on you," is a gimme, but the way she draws emotion out of a tongue-twister like, "If you only saw a friend in me I'd be bittersweet," letting the middle of "bittersweet" go all breathy before drawing it down to finish "-sweet" is something rarer. Top it off with an excellent bridge/outro, which cools the energy of the track down and turns it spacey, and "Electricity" sets a high bar for the careers of all involved, whether long or short. [9]

Maxwell Cavaseno: Mathematically, one would think that the combo of Ronson & Diplo would outweigh and sufficiently overwhelm the brilliance of Dua Lipa's previous garage house classic "One Kiss." However, between the attempts at the garage pitch-shift turning into murky goop, Lipa's limited range getting pressed against her boundaries unflatteringly (especially with that weak sounding Vandross bite on the chorus) and that clichéd '60s soul outro distracting from the retroactivity they're already coming up short on, you can see that this record is a failure with relative ease. Still, given how brilliant the former attempt by Dua Lipa to do house went, one hopes she doesn't lose sight of what actually worked. [3]

Katherine St Asaph: The insistence that Dua Lipa has an on-record personality is the biggest gap between me and the next generation. [5]

Alfred Soto: My out students rave about Dua Lipa; I saw a blankness. But house music demands blankness; it should sound like any person unafraid of loudness and boldness stepping in front of a mike while a piano pounds Latin-indebted melodies and the beats go bump bump. Turns out Dua Lipa and Silk City can do beguiling blankness, especially when Dua drops a couple notes. [7]

Juan F. Carruyo: I've failed to catch the Dua Lipa bug as I can't see what distinguishes her from Selena Gomez or whichever is the hottest pop star at the moment. She seems to get by on her charisma -- which is plentiful -- and crucially; the material provided at hand. She could be a great disco diva should she desire, but this sounds like every other song I've heard from her. [4]

Will Adams: Dua Lipa's sudden turn as a house vocalist seems strange not because it's so obviously calculated as a cog in her trajectory, but because her voice is... not a good fit for it. "Electricity" is standard piano-chug house, but the note you expect to be belted in the chorus -- "I want to let to know" -- is a G4. It's as if the song was intended for someone else but transposed a fifth down once assigned to Dua Lipa. Suddenly, the lack of feeling I got from "One Kiss" starts to make sense. [5]

David Lee: Boilerplate pump-up '90s piano house is never not enjoyable. But, man, imagine if Jennifer Hudson was the vocalist! Instead, Dua Lipa makes me that much more aware of the chorus's limpid release, a slow ooze of good vibes when I'm craving a thunderclap of joy. [6]

Nortey Dowuona: Plunging synths drop down as Dua Lipa smoothly slides past as bass thwacks rise, then dip out as whistling synth strings clip on then fly alongside like streamers as the drums bounce in and carry Dua and the beat away with them, before stopping to pick up Chinese food, milkshakes and some actual party streamers then take off into the stratosphere, leaving behind slithering guitar and teardrop drums to pick up the slack. [8]

Stephen Eisermann: House music is best when accompanied by a big voice, and on "Electricity" Dua provides all the fire the song needs. Sure, it's pretty standard house music, but Dua uses the song as just another example of her artistry and proof that she deserves the worldwide fame she has recently garnered. [7]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: "Electricity" finds Diplo and Mark Ronson utilizing a tried-and-true template that opens up a space for Dua Lipa to take the absolute center stage. Her voice has never sounded more full, more potent, more crucial to a song's success. That last bit is so undeniably true that the lack of new lines and unprocessed vocals in the chorus only has me begging for more. "One Kiss" established the necessity for Dua Lipa to continue down the dance music route; "Electricity" finds her finally coming into her own. [7]

Crystal Leww: Diplo gave an interview to the Dance Chart radio show on Beats 1 about the intent and influence of the Silk City project that spans everything from Nightcrawlers to French Touch to Cajmere to Eric Prydz to Chicago house. I have such disdain for Diplo's continued culture vulture approach to making music, especially borrowing sounds and influence from Black people. "Electricity" was written by Beyoncé songwriter Diana Gordon (a Black woman) but ultimately given to Dua Lipa (a white woman) to sing. Diplo says that he was looking for a big voice. And maybe Gordon didn't want the vocal duties on this song, but it's hard to listen to "Electricity" and not think about tracing a straight line from CeCe Peniston and Crystal Waters who never got their due 25 years ago to every single anonymous Black woman (Yolanda Quartey, Kelli-Leigh) who has contributed to the careers of the persistent stars of EDM this decade. [5]

William John: It's fitting that "Electricity" arrived not long after a change in the seasons; it bursts with new promises and earnestness, dispositions that dominate at those points in the year where the weather is changing and the surroundings seem to take on a different colour. Dua Lipa, who in little over twelve months has transitioned from record label hostage to bona fide superstar, has been criticised for her inelastic and aloof performing style, but here emphatically rebuts such judgments with a vocal contribution that's equally warm, zealous and rousing. Pair that with ascendant house piano chords and belief in love without a perpetuity period is suddenly an energising possibility. [9]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[latestnews2018-blog]

Scarlett Johansson responds to transgender outrage

New Post has been published on https://latestnews2018.com/scarlett-johansson-responds-to-transgender-outrage/

Scarlett Johansson responds to transgender outrage

The casting of the cis-gendered actress as Dante “Tex” Gill has sparked widespread criticism

Scarlett Johansson has not appeared to do herself any favours when, upon being asked for comment about the outrage her casting as a potentially transgender man, one of her representatives told Bustle, “Tell [critics] that they can be directed to Jeffrey Tambor, Jared Leto, and Felicity Huffman’s reps for comment.” All three actors have portrayed transgender characters: Tambor in Transparent, Leto in Dallas Buyers Club and Huffman in Transamerica.

Johansson is set to portray Dante “Tex” Gill, who ran a massage parlour business and prostitution ring in 1970s and ‘80s Pittsburgh. The movie, helmed by British director Rupert Sanders, doesn’t have a release date — but it’s garnered a lot of attention.

“Actors who are trans never even get to audition for anything other than roles of trans characters. That’s the real issue. We can’t even get in the room. Cast actors who are trans as non-trans characters. I dare you,” Jamie Clayton, a transgender actress who appeared in Netflix’s Sense8, said in a tweet that was liked more than 30,000 times.

“Nowhere in this tweet did I say that [Johansson] shouldn’t play this character. I’m bringing attention to an issue that doesn’t get acknowledged. Hire actors who happen to be trans for all kinds of roles and this issue goes away,” Clayton later added.

“Oh word?? So you can continue to play us but we can’t play y’all?” trans actress Trace Lysette, known for her role in Transparent, tweeted on Tuesday. “I wouldn’t be as upset if I was getting in the same rooms as Jennifer Lawrence and Scarlett for cis roles, but we know that’s not the case. A mess.”

“And not only do you play us and steal our narrative and our opportunity but you pat yourselves on the back with trophies and accolades for mimicking what we have lived … so twisted. I’m so done,” Lysette added.

Many believe that transgender characters should only be portrayed by those who identify as transgender, particularly because transgender actors often have trouble finding work in Hollywood.

“I hope the Scarlett Johansson controversy doesn’t keep the amazing story of Jean Marie Gill aka Dante ‘Tex’ Gill from being told — if Johansson was smart, she’d find a new director, take the role of Tex’s girlfriend Cynthia, and give a trans actor a big break,” tweeted YouTube star Grace Randolph.

“Dear Hollywood, here are the rules we the Trans decided: Until the world stops erasing/oppressing/murdering us, trans women play trans women, trans men play trans men, nonbinary people play NB people,” tweeted transgender actress and activist Jen Richards. “If your project needs a ‘star’ for financing, then it’s simply not good enough.”

But, as Bustle pointed out, there is a good deal of controversy over whether Gill identified as transgender. The website wrote that “Hollywood Reporter describes [the character] as ‘a woman [Jean Marie Gill] who succeeded in Pittsburgh’s 1970s and 1980s massage parlour and prostitution business by assuming the identity of a man, Dante ‘Tex’ Gill.’ However, other publications like Vulture have described Johansson’s character as a ‘transmasculine crime boss,’ while others, like the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, called the real-life Gill a lesbian ‘who dressed like a man in suits and ties, wore short hair and sideburns and preferred to be called ‘Mr. Gill.’ “

Likely fuelling the outrage is the fact that Johansson and Sanders came under fire for the last movie they made together, Ghost in the Shell. In it, Johansson portrayed a Japanese woman in a white cyborg’s body. Many saw this as whitewashing.

“It was particularly heinous because they ran CGI tests to make her look more Asian,” actress Constance Wu said at the time, referring to reports, denied by Paramount, that the studio altered her appearance with CGI, according to the Hollywood Reporter. “Some people call it ‘yellowface,’ but I say ‘the practice of blackface employed on Asians’ because that’s more evocative.”

The movie was a flop, and at least one executive claimed the casting controversy was why.

“We had hopes for better results domestically. I think the conversation regarding casting impacted the reviews,” Kyle Davies, domestic distribution chief for Paramount, told CBC.

[mrmichaelchadler]

Thumbnails Special Edition: Women Writers Week 2018

Women Writers Week has been an outstanding success in every respect. I am so proud of all the amazing female writers who have contributed their voices to our site over the past five days. For this special edition of Thumbnails, I am celebrating all of them, while highlighting a handful of excerpts showcasing their talents. For our official table of contents, click here. You can also find my personal introduction to #WomensWritersWeek here. And please know that each of our contributors write powerful articles and reviews either here, or at their own websites and print media all year long. A hearty thanks to all!—Chaz Ebert

1. 

"It Takes an Army": Carrie Rickey takes a close look at the disparity between male and female directors and the people fighting to correct it. See also: Jennifer Merin's optimistic take on the future for women in the industy; Olivia Collette's reflections on the documentary "Searching for Debra Winger"in light of the #MeToo movement; and Joyce Kulhawik's conversation with legendary burlesque queen Tempest Storm.

“Since 1998, Martha Lauzen, professor at San Diego State University, and head of the Center for Women in Television and Film, has published the annual Celluloid Ceiling report tracking film employment, the ‘Boxed In’ report, that does the same for women’s employment in TV, and ‘It’s a Man’s World,’ tracking representation of women on the big and small screens. In the 1990s, she read newspaper articles about how women were doing better in film and TV. The reports were anecdotal—they were about the unicorns, or exceptions—and had no correlation with what she was seeing on the big and small screens, and in the credits. ‘I started conducting research on an annual basis to accurately document women’s underemployment, and to build industry awareness,’ she wrote in an email. It didn’t occur to her that it would take decades to build momentum and ‘for the demographics of the country to help push it along.’ The Center tracks employment for women in all areas behind the camera, from cinematographer to screenwriter. (Lauzen was the first to provide statistics showing how a woman director boosts the number of women on the set: on films with exclusively male directors, women accounted for only 15% of editors and 5% of cinematographers. On films with female directors, the percentages of women editors rose to 35%, and cinematographers to 26%.)”

2. 

"How to Create Sex Scenes That Women Will Enjoy as Much as Men": An undervalued topic is given a wonderful analysis by Olivia Collette. See also: Violet LeVoit article on the representation of C-sections in American movies; and Kristen Lopez's two excellent articles, "On the Representation of Disabled Women in Cinema" and "Disability Theater Access in 2018."

“When critics focused on Lena Dunham’s body during her sex scenes in ‘Girls,’ they often missed how much women enjoyed watching those scenes. It wasn’t just the comedic awkwardness of some of it; it’s that we were seeing women with developed sexual appetites enjoying sex on their own terms. Marnie runs to the bathroom to masturbate after an artist speaks to her commandingly. Jessa wears her sexuality like armor. And Hannah loves to experiment, even if it garners mixed results. They govern their sex lives, and they have fun doing it. Elsewhere, ‘Basic Instinct’ is a fucked-up film, and though it ultimately equates Catherine’s murderousness with her ravenous bisexuality, it also has the balls to show us a woman who loves sex and is in complete control of the sex she’s having. Not only is it hot to watch, the movie makes it quite clear that sex with Catherine is amazing.”

3.

"'Phantom Thread,' Jane Eyre and the Power Dynamics of the Hetero Romance": An amazing, in-depth exploration of the literary legacy of Paul Thomas Anderson's latest Oscar-winner. See also: Jessica Ritchey's case for how "Night of the Living Dead" destroyed Hammer films; Elena Lazic's impassioned defense of "The Greatest Showman"; and the 30th anniversary of "Working Girl," as commemorated by Christy Lemire, Sheila O'Malley and Susan Wloszczyna. 

“While this resolution has the thrill of the unexpected within the context of the film’s narrative, it also had a ring of familiarity, recalling another great story of a man’s domestication: Jane Eyre. Jane is a small, poor young woman who works for the rich, overpowering Mr. Rochester. They fall in love, though their relationship is an ongoing battle of wills, as strong-willed Jane attempts to remain her own master while Rochester both loves her strength and treats her as something of a possession, expecting the ease and subservience his maleness and wealth and power have always afforded him. Jane leaves Rochester (mad wife in the attic—you know how it is), grows, turns down a proposal from a man who doesn’t love her, and conveniently inherits her own wealth. When she returns to Rochester, she finds him scarred, blind, and short a hand (that mad wife, again!). Rather than harming their relationship, this development—which has calmed him, made him meeker, less certain, more dependent—is the linchpin that finally makes their relationship tenable. Like Alma and Reynolds, it allows them to settle into an ideal and idealized marriage, complete with baby.”

4. 

"Return of 'Roseanne' Marked by Notable Highs and Lows": The popular TV reboot is given a sublime review by Allison Shoemaker. See also: Shoemaker's review of FX's "The Americans"; and Jana Monji's essays on ABC's "The Good Doctor" and Netflix's "Lost in Space".

“If the show has a weakness outside of its off-putting ‘topical’ moments, it’s Barr’s portrayal of the still-compelling central figure. She’s as charismatic as she ever was, with great timing and that terrific laugh, but there’s a hesitancy to her performance, particularly in the first episode, that was rarely, if ever, in evidence the first time around. That’s a quality that does eventually seem to fade—in the second episode, she’s back in fine form—but whether due to nerves, a little rustiness, or some other factor entirely, the spark is somewhat diminished. The same can be said of both Goranson and Fishman, though like Barr, Goranson seems more at ease as the series progresses. And while you couldn’t call the newest Connor kids rusty, the young actors recruited for this go-round lack the relaxed quality that made the young Goranson and Gilbert’s performances so memorable. Still, they all have a quality that’s essential to the show’s DNA: they can layer in the world-weariness, sorrow, or slight touch of bitterness that allow the jokes to land all the harder, because they feel so real. These characters are funny. They find life funny. But the reality isn’t funny at all.”

5. 

"King in the Wilderness": A must-read four-star review penned by Arielle Bernstein. See also: Monica Castllo's review of "Acrimony"; Tomris Laffly's review of "Birthmarked";  Tina Hassannia's review of "The China Hustle"; Susan Wloszczyna's review of "Finding Your Feet"; Jessica Ritchey's review of "First Match"; Justine Smith's review of "Gemini"; Sheila O'Malley's reviews of "God's Not Dead: A Light in the Darkness" and "The Last Movie Star"; Nell Minow's review of "Love After Love"; Allison Shoemaker's review of "Outside In"; and Christy Lemire's review of "Ready Player One".

“‘King in the Wilderness’ is a quiet and understated film, which lingers lovingly on its subject. We see Dr. King’s famous sermons at the pulpit, and also see him sitting quietly with family and friends. Regardless of whether King is performing to a crowd or sharing a private moment with someone dear to him, his gentle and determined spirit permeates every scene. This is true in the actual found footage, as well as moments that capture his friend’s recollections about the kind of man he was. These interviews convey King’s private hopes, as well as fears, frustrations, and doubts. We learn that King had a great sense of humor, worried about his ability to be a good father and husband, and wrestled with his ability to lead under the threat of violence to his own person. At one point, he develops a tic when he speaks, which eventually resolves on its own. When his friend asks about it, he explain ‘I made my peace with death.’”

Image of the Day

Filmmaker Andrew Haigh chats with Tomris Laffly about his acclaimed, beautifully shot new movie, "Lean on Pete."

Video of the Day

The Life of a Woman, Directed by Women from emma piper-burket on Vimeo.

I absolutely love Emma Piper-Burket's new video essay, "The Life of a Woman, Directed by Women," spanning 122 years and containing clips of trailblazing artists on every content.

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'Awards Chatter' Podcast — Stephen Colbert ('The Late Show With Stephen Colbert')

http://styleveryday.com/2017/08/20/awards-chatter-podcast-stephen-colbert-the-late-show-with-stephen-colbert/

'Awards Chatter' Podcast — Stephen Colbert ('The Late Show With Stephen Colbert')

“I wanted to change as a performer,” Stephen Colbert says as we sit down in the offices of CBS’ The Late Show, high above the Ed Sullivan Theater in Midtown Manhattan, on a “Pizza Tuesday” — a Tuesday when Colbert’s staff is treated to pizza because The Late Show topped the previous week’s ratings — and begin discussing why he agreed to say goodbye to “Stephen Colbert,” a character he perfected over 20 years on Comedy Central’s The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, in order to succeed David Letterman as the host of the Tiffany Network’s late-night centerpiece. “I wanted to change what my responsibilities were on a daily basis,” he continues in an intervew with The Hollywood Reporter‘s Awards Chatter podcast. “I just wanted to go out there and do jokes for people.”

It’s been almost two years since Colbert’s debut as The Late Show‘s host. And it’s been almost one year since disappointing ratings, an Emmys snub and a general lack of buzz prompted some to begin writing off a man who had shared in two Peabody Awards and three writing Emmys during his tenure at The Daily Show (which won five Emmys for best variety series while he was there) and who subsequently had picked up another two Peabodys, four writing Emmys and two Emmys for best variety series at The Colbert Report. There even were suggestions that he would be asked to swap time slots with James Corden’s The Late Late Show — or be replaced altogether.

What a difference a year — and a presidential election — can make! This year, The Late Show, rather than NBC’s The Tonight Show, finished the season atop late-night ratings for the first time in 22 years; The Late Show, and not The Tonight Show, garnered a nom for best variety talk series (plus two others); Colbert’s election-night special for CBS’ sister cable network, Showtime, Stephen Colbert’s Live Election Night Democracy’s Series Finale: Who’s Going to Clean Up This Shit? received a nom for best variety special (plus two others); and Colbert himself is set to host the 69th Emmy Awards on Sept. 17. As “Stephen Colbert” might have asked, were he still around: great comeback, or greatest comeback?

(Click above to listen to this episode or here to access all of our 170 episodes via iTunes. Past guests include Oprah Winfrey, Steven Spielberg, Meryl Streep, Eddie Murphy, Lady Gaga, Robert De Niro, Amy Schumer, Will Smith, Jennifer Lopez, Louis C.K., Emma Stone, Harvey Weinstein, Natalie Portman, Jerry Seinfeld, Jane Fonda, Lin-Manuel Miranda, Nicole Kidman, Aziz Ansari, Taraji P. Henson, J.J. Abrams, Helen Mirren, Justin Timberlake, Brie Larson, Ryan Reynolds, Alicia Vikander, Warren Beatty, Jessica Chastain, Samuel L. Jackson, Kate Winslet, Sting, Isabelle Huppert, Tyler Perry, Sally Field, Michael Moore, Lily Collins, Denzel Washington, Mandy Moore, Ricky Gervais, Kristen Stewart, James Corden, Sarah Silverman, Michael B. Jordan, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Bill Maher, Lily Tomlin, Ryan Murphy, Allison Janney, Eddie Redmayne, Reese Witherspoon, Trevor Noah, Elisabeth Moss, Jay Leno, Kris Jenner, Rami Malek, Jill Soloway, Robert Pattinson, Kate Beckinsale and Jimmy Kimmel.)

Colbert, who is 53, was born in Washington, D.C., and raised in South Carolina, the youngest of 11 kids in a deeply observant Catholic family. At the age of 10, his life was rocked when his father and his two brothers closest in age to him were killed in the crash of Eastern Air Lines Flight 212. “I have said to myself more than once, ‘Gosh, I hope I live long enough to figure out what that did to me,’ ” he solemnly reflects. “It’s almost like that event created a labyrinth in my mind in which I could hide when I was younger — no one could find me if I went into the labyrinth of that experience — but I was also lost in there.” By that time, Colbert’s surviving siblings were out of the home, meaning that he and his mother largely were left to take care of each other. During his ensuing adolescent years, Colbert’s spirits were lifted by comedy albums that he listened to every night (“Comedy saved my life,” he says) and it was out of a desire to brighten his mother’s spirits that he increasingly gravitated toward performing comedy himself (“I wanted to make her laugh and feel better”).

After “barely” graduating from high school as a result of having neglected his studies in favor of reading for pleasure and playing Dungeons & Dragons, Colbert studied for two years at Hampden-Sydney College in Virginia, before transferring to Northwestern University in order to pursue a theater major. There, a drama teacher insisted that students drop their facades and open up about their innermost feelings, and, Colbert says decades later, “I think it was the first time in my life I started to reflect on what had happened to me and my family as a child.” While in Chicago, Colbert also met Del Close, one of the legendary gurus of improvisation, and began studying improv on the side, ultimately at fabled Second City, where he was hired to join the national touring company in 1988. (There, he understudied Steve Carell, whom he would later recommend for a job at The Daily Show, and became particularly close with Paul Dinello and Amy Sedaris, with whom he would later co-create, with Mitch Rouse, Strangers With Candy for Comedy Central.)

In 1994, Colbert left Second City and headed to New York, where he had been offered a job writing for the Comedy Central sketch-comedy series Exit 57 — which promptly was canceled. Following a brief return to Chicago, he, his wife and their newborn child moved to New York for good when he was hired to write for ABC’s The Dana Carvey Show (on which he and Carell also voiced the characters of Ace and Gary, respectively, in Robert Smigel‘s The Ambiguously Gay Duo cartoons, which they later reprised on Saturday Night Live). That show was canceled after only eight episodes had aired. Thus began for Colbert a “dark period” of “soul-crushing work,” stints on the unemployment rolls and general uncertainty about his future. Interestingly, it had been at The Dana Carvey Show that he first was asked to play a newsman (the episodes in which he did so never aired), and it was after its cancellation that he was hired, as one of many short-term gigs, to do the same in humorous segments for ABC’s Good Morning America (just two of those segments aired). That, in turn, brought him to the attention of The Daily Show, which he reluctantly joined as a field correspondent in 1997, when Craig Kilborn was still the anchor. He recalls, “I was like, ‘Oh, my God, I’m an actor, why am I going to be a correspondent?’ “

Two years later, Jon Stewart succeeded Kilborn, and Colbert — who had been splitting his time between The Daily Show and launching Strangers With Candy — couldn’t have been happier. “We hit it off immediately,” he says, explaining, “He was injecting the show with purpose and an editorial position, and when I came back, he invited us to put our own thoughts, our own feelings, our own editorial position in what we were doing. We weren’t widgets to him; we were creative partners.” One of the things that Colbert took upon himself to do was create “Stephen Colbert,” a self-important newsman “persona,” initially modeled after a local TV news reporter; then after an all-business pro like Stone Phillips; and ultimately after a selection of the talking-head pundits who were beginning to proliferate across TV at the time, but one, in particular: Bill O’Reilly. “I really do think that he’s a well-intentioned, poorly informed, high-status idiot,” Colbert says of the now-disgraced Fox News alum, “which was my model.”

By 2005, having become immensely popular over his years on The Daily Show, Colbert was ready to move on to his next adventure. “I really liked working with Jon, but I wanted to leave because there was only so much I could do,” he recalls. “Jon was always going to be the guy with the ball, as well he should be — there’s no greater runner, he’s the master — but I knew I could only do so much for him. It was a beautiful note, but it was only one note that I could do for him in his chorus of correspondents.” Colbert and Stewart pitched a sitcom to NBC, but the network passed, and then Comedy Central asked if they might like to create a Daily Show spinoff, starring “Stephen Colbert,” which would follow The Daily Show each evening. They bit, and for the next decade, The Daily Show and The Colbert Report arguably were television’s best — and certainly its funniest — one-two punch.

In April 2014, when it was announced that David Letterman would be vacating his job as host of The Late Show, few imagined that Colbert, who had been Letterman’s guest 10 times over the years, might replace him. But, Colbert says, “I had already decided I wasn’t gonna do the [Colbert Report] show anymore,” and when CBS approached him about the position, he began seriously considering it — largely because he thought his mother, who had died less than a year earlier, would have liked him to. “In some ways, all of this was for her,” he says. “She would absolutely have been so tickled.” Colbert realized that he would be trading in cable for broadcast, giving up four half-hour shows a week for five hourlong shows and, most significantly, retiring “Stephen Colbert” for Stephen Colbert even though, as he puts it, “No one ever knew that guy” — and he took the plunge. His first Late Show aired on Sept. 8, 2015.

Did Colbert make the right move? “I was an actor, and this is not acting,” he says. “This is a harder job. There’s a challenge to driving a car straight, as opposed to swerving all over the road.” Even though Colbert brought almost all of his Colbert Report staff — some 80 people — with him to the new job, and even though he had not had a showrunner before, it quickly became apparent that without one, he, “a control freak” who was hands-on with every detail of the show, from its set to its greenrooms to its comedy, was in trouble. “I lost my mind,” he acknowledges in hindsight. “I couldn’t sleep at night because clearly, aesthetically or in terms of having an editorial intention, the show was not coalescing. People didn’t know what they were gonna get — they didn’t know what it was about — because neither did I. I had thrown out the baby with the bathwater: In trying to not be my character, I also threw out my interests which led to the character.”

The first of two major turning points for the show came on April 2, 2016, after it already had been on the air for eight lackluster months, when CBS chief Les Moonves arranged a meeting between Colbert and Chris Licht, a producer who had helped a number of other shows on the network find their footing. Colbert recalls Licht’s proposal for a collaboration: “He said, ‘Any moment you’re not thinking about comedy, I’ve failed.’ And I said, ‘Let’s shake on it. Do you want the job?’ ” Ever since, Colbert asserts, he has gotten better about “letting go and just enjoying being onstage with the audience,” and he also has arrived at an understanding that “what works in one of these shows, at least in my experience, is, I’m gonna talk to you about the thing that you’ve already been talking about today, and we’re gonna give you our take on this thing that everybody’s talking about, to give you some context — and maybe calm you down about it.”

The second turning point came on Nov. 8, 2016, the night of the U.S. presidential election, when Colbert was hosting his live Showtime special, for which he and his team had planned all sorts of comedic material. But as it became apparent, to everyone’s disbelief, that Donald Trump actually was going to win, Licht approached Colbert with a piece of advice that the host says he took to heart. “He said, ‘No more bits. All the things we have planned, let’s just throw [them] out the window. Just go over there and talk to people.’ So that’s what the show became [that night], and we’ve tried to not let go of that.” Colbert continues, “That show changed us because it showed me the value of not pretending to feel some way you’re not.” In other words, rather than avoiding politics simply because it had been the bread and butter of “Stephen Colbert,” Colbert would tackle politics head-on because it was precisely what was on his mind — and therefore, in all likelihood, others’ minds, too. Two weeks after the election, Colbert’s Late Show topped the ratings for the first time, and it hasn’t looked back since.

“There’s a lot of things that have changed,” Colbert muses. “I have an even deeper respect for [ABC late-night host Jimmy] Kimmel and [NBC late-night host Jimmy] Fallon and [TBS’ current/NBC’s former late-night host] Conan [O’Brien] and the people who came before us. I always respected their comedy, but I really respect them professionally because I didn’t know what they were doing until I got here.” He hastens to add, “I’ve learned to trust my staff,” noting that he could not have done 17 live shows over the past year if he hadn’t. And, above all, at long last, he’s having fun. “I love this job,” he says with a big smile. “I couldn’t love it more. This feels, right now, like the first year of the old gig. There’s a sense of excitement, and I hope that is throughout the whole building — that people feel like they’ve created something new that wasn’t here a year ago.”

Stephen Colbert Primetime Emmy Awards The Daily Show

#Awards #Chatter #Colbert #Late #Podcast #Show #Stephen

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Kaylee’s Ordeal

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2011

Kaylee's OrdealIntroduction: Kaylee finds a secret room in Mr. Peters' house. Kaylee was surprised to hear the doorbell after nine o’clock so she set aside her Algebra homework and peered out the little curtained window next to the door. It was Jennifer, her best friend, and she looked upset as she fidgeted in the December cold on the front porch. They were both in their cheer uniforms because there had been a game that afternoon and while the sweater was actually pretty warm, the short pleated skirt did nothing to keep the chill out. Jen noticed her peering out the window and called out, “Come on Melon, let me in. It’s fucking cold out here!” She unbolted the door and drew back the chain and let her friend in. Mr. Peters wouldn’t be home until after midnight and Kaylee assumed he wouldn’t mind if she had a friend over as long as it wasn’t a boy. Elizabeth, Mr. Peter’s five year daughter, was already asleep in her bed anyway. Never-the-less, Kaylee wished that she could have kept her out – she was obviously upset about something – and if she was right in her suspicions it was about Johnny. Jen and Johnny had been in a on-again off-again relationship all sophomore year and every couple of weeks it seemed her friend was crying on her shoulder vowing never to see him again. Of course, she was always right back by his side in no time. Kaylee felt that Jen was obsessed and that her relationship with Johnny, a senior, was just not healthy. Her friend had confided in her that she had given the football player a blowjob on their last date and that she intended to give him her virginity on Prom night; if he ever got around to asking her to prom that was. It was just acts of desperation, Kaylee saw, Jen was giving him her most precious gifts in hopes it would keep him interested. That wasn’t the way it was supposed to work – Kaylee was saving herself for someone who was definitely committed to her and had proven it by marrying her. Not that she ever intended to put a penis in her mouth – Jen said it wasn’t that bad – but the thought of it just sent shivers down her spine. It was degrading to women, and just plain disgusting. Kaylee’s husband would have to be a gentleman, like Linus Larabee. While she did get tired of Jen’s drama, Kaylee was not wary of her blonde squad mate because it was likely more of the same old story. The truth was, if she and Johnny were on the outs, there was a fairly good chance that it was Kaylee’s fault this time. When she had heard how he had ejaculated in Jen’s mouth and then told her to swallow it – she couldn’t even think about such a thing without gagging a little – she had been pretty upset with him. After the game that afternoon, she had marched right up to him dragged him over to the bleachers and told him in no uncertain terms that he needed to treat her friend with respect. At first he had just smirked at her – in disbelief that she was so nosy. It was that kind of thing that really got her irritated: when guys treated her like she was just a dumb girl. And, like always, he had spent most of the time staring at her breasts. Kaylee was self-conscious about her large breasts as it was and never appreciated the attention they garnered her from just about every boy and man she encountered. (Jen, who had something but not much, was insanely jealous of Kaylee’s boobs and had once held up a small watermelon at the market and loudly proclaimed it the same size as Kaylee’s tit. From that point on, Jen always called her Melon, and it was her favorite game to call attention to her friend’s boobs in any public setting.) She had been fuming at him, railing on about respect and dignity, when he had just stepped in close and said, “Maybe this will shut you up.” Then he pressed his lips against hers and began kissing her. At first she just froze, in complete shock. The truth was, she had only ever had one other kiss, in Junior High and it had been awkward and short. But Johnny was firmly kissing her, his strong arms pulling her against him, and his tongue in her mouth. Suddenly she was very aware of how cute he was – she had always thought he was attractive – and his cheeks were stubbly, manly, and she liked the feel of them on her face. He didn’t smell good, he was all sweaty from the game, but somehow it was a bit intoxicating – masculine – and it caught her off guard. Without even really thinking at all, she just started kissing him back, in a daze reaching up around his body and squeezing him – feeling his muscles. His hands moved to her breasts and she felt her nipples harden. No-one had ever touched her there before and it felt so good. And then she thought, no wonder Jen is so nuts for him! It was that thought, not the fact that she had compromised all her ethics and feminist ideals in the span of one chauvinistic affront, that snapped her out of it. She pulled back and stopped him when he tried to kiss her again. “Johnny, we can’t do this. What about Jen?” “Melon, we already did it. And you can’t take it back now. Look, Jen’s nice. I like her a lot. But you know as well as I do that we aren’t going to last. She’s not long term girlfriend material. And I’ve always secretly wanted you anyway.” Kaylee hated herself for being so flattered by his words. He was a guy who had only yesterday came in her best friend’s mouth and was now hitting on her. There was no way she could ever trust him. Hell, he had just called her Melon, a nickname she hated! But his compliment went right to the heart of her and Jen’s whole dynamic and it pleased her that someone realized she wasn’t easy like Jen. But she was back in control of her faculties and knew she would not let this happen again. She didn’t date jocks – well she really hadn’t accepted any of the numerous date invitations she received on a regular basis, but she certainly didn’t intend to make Johnny the first exception. “I would really appreciate it if you didn’t mention this to Jen. It would only hurt her. If you really feel that Jen isn’t long term girlfriend material, then you should break up with her once and for all. Let her move on with her life.” With that, she managed to somehow hold her head up high and marched off, still trying to regain her arrogant composure. But now she was face to face with a visibly upset Jen and she realized that she didn’t know if her friend knew about the kiss. If she did, would she believe Kaylee that it had been all his doing? That she had been a victim of unwanted attention? She didn’t have to wait long to find out. Jen plopped down on the sofa and immediately began ranting about Johnny. Apparently he had broken up with her, saying pretty much what Kaylee had said to him. Jen needed to get on with her life. “But he told me it was because he was interested in someone else.” Kaylee looked at her friend’s face carefully. There was anger in Jen’s eyes but she couldn’t know if it was directed at her, or at Johnny. Inside she was screaming how sorry she was, but she just couldn’t bring herself to confess. If she didn’t already know, then she could spare her friend the pain of knowing that he had kissed her best friend. Confessing did nothing to make things better, so she held her tongue. “Do you have any idea who it could be? Have you seen him chatting it up with any other girls?” The cheerleader sat back and played with a long red curl as if deep in thought. “Johnny’s always flirting with everyone, Jen. I’ve told you a million times that he’s a horndog.” This was a very truthful answer: if you ignored the fact that it completely dodged the real question. “I know. I probably shouldn’t even be upset, right. Good riddance to bad rubbish and all that. At least I still have you.” Kaylee leaned in and hugged her friend who hugged her back. After a minute or two, Jen pushed her away. “Get off me, Melon – you lezzy slut!” And so they moved on to other topics, although every few minutes Jen would return to the subject of Johnny and his mystery crush. The whole thing was making Kaylee so nervous, she decided to try and distract her friend by suggesting they snoop around the house. Ordinarily she would never do such a thing, but she was desperate to keep Jen busy with something other than her heartbreak. Besides, Mr. Peters was as straight-laced as they come and they probably wouldn’t find any more interesting than a Playboy in his side drawer anyway. In the master bedroom Jen found a gun in his side drawer, secured with a trigger lock. It was pretty heavy and mean looking. Guns made Kaylee nervous, especially when Jen picked it up and pointed it at her. “I’d sure like to know who mystery-girl is right now – one squeeze of the trigger and Johnny’s mine again.” Kaylee laughed and took the gun from her, trying to hide her anxiety, “He’s not worth going to jail for, Jen. Besides, maybe she didn’t do anything to encourage his attention.” “Oh no, Kaylee, he told me that he kissed her! That she kissed him back! The slut let him feel her up.” No-one had ever called Kaylee a slut before. She supposed she deserved it, but she wasn’t a slut! It had just been that he had caught her off guard. He practically assaulted her and it only took her a couple of minutes to snap out of it. And she had stopped it. How was she ever going to be able to explain herself to Jen? Mr. Peters did have pornography, a Penthouse magazine, in his dresser drawer. They spent a few moments looking at the glossy images of women, legs spread and holding their pussies open with their fingers. Kaylee had never seen anything so revolting, although she had to admit the women were very beautiful. None of them had grotesquely huge breasts like hers. She commented that she didn’t understand why slutty girls shaved their pubic hair, and Jen chuckled, pulling her skirt up and her bloomers down to reveal a completely smooth pussy. “It’s because we know guys don’t like getting hair in their teeth.” “Oh gross!” Kaylee was shocked. Of course she trimmed her bush for bathing suits – that was just good hygiene – but she had never thought that anyone in the real world went bald. “Of course, Kaylee, you shouldn’t ever do this. Redheads are rare and guys love red pussy hair. But you could leave just a thin strip down the middle. Or make a heart or something; that would be cute.” It had only been two years ago that she and Jen were kissing their own hands, trying to learn how, and completely ignorant of anything sexual. How had Jen moved so much further along this depraved path? “Johnny refused to go down on me. Can you believe that? He said he was watching his carbs. And after I ate his come too. Guys have such a double standard. He wouldn’t even kiss me again after I brushed my teeth.” “Can you blame him? It’s not exactly sanitary. I mean, he pees from there.” “Remember when Mr. Johnson told us how the Apollo 13 astronauts drank their own urine. He said it was sterile and harmless. It’s not like I licked old crusty urine from a toilet, Kaylee. Besides he was very clean at the time. You’ll see soon enough.” “Not me, Jen. I wouldn’t date a guy who expected that.” Jen stared hard at her for a moment, and Kaylee just knew that Jen knew. Johnny had told her all about their kiss and she was going to explode now. But instead Jen just laughed, “Yeah, you probably wouldn’t. You’re going to have the most boring sex life in the whole world, Kaylee. What a waste of fantastic tits!” Kaylee’s heart was racing, and she felt her face start to flush. “Uh, I need to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.” Kaylee went into the bathroom and relieved herself. Then she took a long hard look at herself in the mirror. It wasn’t fair to Jen what had happened. Her friend was hurting, and it was at least a little bit her fault. She had known Jen for a long time, and even though her friend was kind of a blossoming young slut, they were still best friends. She owed her the truth. Summoning up all her courage, she went back into the master bedroom to confess. Jen wasn’t in the bedroom anymore, but Kaylee heard noises coming from the large walk-in closet. She entered and was surprised to see that the back wall was open. A huge panel had slid aside. Mr. Peters had a secret room in his house. There was nothing that could have prepared Kaylee for what she found in this room. Even Jen seemed taken aback by it. It was a substantial room, about thirteen feet square, with a concrete floor and cinderblock walls. There were no windows and the only way in or out was back through the closet. One wall was covered with peg board, and neatly organized hung whips, and ropes, and chains, and paddles, and clamps, and – oh my God! Were those dildos? Plastic cocks of all different shapes and sizes were arranged on the wall. The next wall had a large wooden X attached to it, like a cross tilted diagonally. At each of the extremities there was a heavy iron loop, which Kaylee instinctively knew was for tying rope. The last wall, had three large screen flat panel displays on it. Looking around Kaylee saw that there were a dozen or so video cameras set at all angles. What kind of sicko was Mr. Peters? “Can you believe this shit?” Jen said. She was kneeling next to a large wooden box that was bolted to the center of the floor. The top was covered with padded leather and straps dangled on the sides. It was about table height. It looked ominous but the purpose of it wasn’t evident. “Uh, I think we better get out here right now. Mr. Peters wouldn’t like us in here.” An evil grin crossed Jen’s pretty face, “Oh, I think he’d really like us in here.” “Oh sick! He’s like my Dad’s age.” “Come on Kaylee. Those Penthouse Pets are only two or three years older than us. You’ve been babysitting for him a lot. I bet he thinks about having you strapped down in here all the time.” Kaylee was actually kind of afraid at this point. Was this kind of thing even legal? She tried to imagine what it would be like to be strapped down, helpless, while someone violated her. “I want to go, Jen. I’m not comfortable with this.” As if reading her mind, Jen stood up and approached the box. She went up against it, and Kaylee now saw that there were grooves in the corner in which her legs fit snugly. “I think I’ve figured this thing out. The woman stands here and then bends over the top.” Jen bent over, her stomach on the padding and her small breasts hanging off the other side, and Kaylee saw that her cheer skirt lifted up to the point where her bloomers were in view. “Then she reaches down and grabs hold of these handles.” Again there were grooves in which her arms fit nicely. “Then Mr. Peters straps her in and does his thing.” “Jen, we shouldn’t be messing with this stuff. For all we know these cameras are on! We need to leave before we get caught.” “None of the red lights on the cameras are on, Melon. He won’t be home for hours. Quit being such a dork – when are we ever going to get a chance like this again? Here, you try it.” Jen stood up and motioned for Kaylee to get on the box. She shook her head no. In the pit of her stomach she felt sick. How was she ever going to face Mr. Peters again? “Come on Kaylee!” Jen whined, “You’ve got to do it. I did it. It’s so weird imagining what it would be like to be restrained like that.” “I don’t want to, Jen. I feel like we’re violating Mr. Peters’ privacy. It’s not right for us to be in here.” “Look, just try it and then we’ll leave. I promise.” Kaylee looked at her friend with a helpless look, but knew she was going to give in. She walked up to the box and tried not to think about Mr. Peters as she put her legs in the grooves and bent over. “Holy shit, Melon! Look how your tits hang!” Kaylee started to get back up, but Jen put a hand on her back. “No – come on – you have to grab those handles.” The young cheerleader frowned at her friend and reached down and grasped the handles. She had to admit that the position she was in was uniquely sexual. She was on her tip toes, and her ass was pointing out, and her tits were hanging down. If she had been strapped down, Mr. Peters would be able to do anything to her he wanted. “Hey, Melon! Look at this!” Jen was now standing by the television monitors and there was a touch screen display that she was typing on. In the span of two seconds, Kaylee became aware of several things at once: First, there was a loud clicking sound, and she felt clamps close around her ankles and wrists. Second, the room was suddenly flooded with light. Third, there was a mild electronic hum and all the screens came to life and Kaylee now saw herself from several different angles, strapped to the bench. Looking around she saw that all the cameras now had red lights. And last, she watched the door slide shut with a hiss. “Jen! What did you do? I’m stuck! Turn it off!” Kaylee was panicking and felt like she couldn’t get enough air. Jen was laughing loudly. “Calm down, Kaylee. I figured out this whole contraption when you were in the bathroom. I’m just fucking with you.” Kaylee tried to calm down, “Please let me up, Jen. I don’t like this at all.” She knew she was about to cry and really didn’t want to give Jen anything more to tease her about. Jen walked over to the bench. “This really is an ingenious device, don’t you think?” She pulled a strap from the sides of the bench and pulled it tight across Kaylee’s back. “This lever spreads your legs wide.” Kaylee saw on one of the monitors that Jen pulled a lever near her feet and the shackles on her legs pulled out hard, spreading her. “OW! Damn it, Jen, stop playing around!” “Oh, Melon, you must be so uncomfortable. Let me help you.” She went around the front and pulled out a stand. It was an adjustable prop, with a large metal collar on it. Jen fastened it around Kaylee’s neck. Now she could rest her head, which was more comfortable, but she was forced to look forward, her chin pointing out. “Look at yourself, Melon!” Kaylee couldn’t help but look at herself. She was larger than life on the monitors. “If Mr. Peters was here, I bet he’d rip off your bloomers and fuck you silly.” “Come on Jen, this isn’t funny. I want to get up.” “But you haven’t seen the best part, Melon.” Jen stooped down in front of her and pulled up her sweater and bra freeing her breasts. “What the fuck are you doing?” “Check this out,” Jen laughed and pulled two little clamps out from a drawer at the base of the unit. She put one on each of Kaylee’s nipples, causing her to scream. The clamps were attached to retractable cords that pulled down, stretching out her nipples. Kaylee was gritting her teeth, the pain was intense, “GET ME OUT OF THIS RIGHT NOW!” Now she was pissed. Jen had definitely crossed the line. “Okay, okay. Calm down, Kaylee. I was just messing with you. Let me shut it off.” While Kaylee whimpered, Jen went to the panel and tapped away. “This should do it.” Kaylee heard some clicking and felt vibration coming from the box. She pulled against her restraints but they didn’t open. Then in horror she watched on the monitor from a side angle as a drawer opened from the bottom of the box between her legs and a pneumatic arm raised up holding a large black dildo. The drawer then began to slowly retract, pulling the dildo closer to her inch by inch. “Oops!” Jen said, tapping on the controls some more, “This doesn’t seem to be responding.” “Jen, this isn’t funny! Stop that thing!”

“I’m pressing the release button. It’s not releasing. It worked when you were in the bathroom!” The dildo made contact with Kaylee, pressing against her bloomers. It was clearly trying to penetrate her and she felt the smooth material of her panties and bloomers pushing inside of her. It hurt a lot, but just kept pressing. “OH GOD! It’s trying to go in! Stop it, Jen! Turn it off!” “I’m trying! Damn it, this thing is not responding!” “OH! FUCK!” An inch of her panties and bloomers had been pushed inside of her by the dildo, and it was tearing her dry pussy. Slowly the dildo retreated, and Kaylee sighed in relief, but then it reverse and slowly began trying to penetrate her again. “Jen! It’s trying to fuck me! Don’t let it fuck me! Please, God, please turn it off! Oh it’s tearing me up!” Jen saw on the monitors that it was pushing her underwear inside of her pussy. She moved over to Kaylee, and said, “Honey, I think I’m going to have to move your bloomers or it’s really going to hurt you.” As the dildo pulled out, Jen grabbed her bloomers and panties and pulled them down. When the dildo made its way back it now entered her pussy unhindered. Her pussy was still raw, but it didn’t hurt as much. The dildo kept penetrating her about an inch and then backing away – little by little Kaylee felt her pussy dampen and then it actually began to feel good. “Oh God, Jen. Please stop this.” “Working on it, Kaylee. I just don’t understand why it’s not working. Maybe I can unplug it.” There were no wires anywhere on the box, it must have been hard wired through the floor. “I’m so sorry, Kaylee, I’ll turn it off I swear.” She was back tapping on the panel, and then the dildo stopped slowly teasing her and began to push into her very slowly. “Jen! It’s going deeper! It’s going to fuck me! Shit, it’s going to take my cherry! Please, turn it off.” Kaylee felt the dildo brush up against her hymen. If Jen didn’t figure it out soon, she was going to be deflowered by this evil machine. Jen then moved over to Kaylee and knelt down in front of her, looking her in the eye. “You know, I intended to give my cherry to Johnny at the prom.” Kaylee bit her lip as the dildo pressed into her, and then screamed as it burst through her cherry. “Now he tells me that he wants to take you to the prom. You, Kaylee. My best friend.” “Oh God! Fuck it hurts!” The dildo pushed into Kaylee, six inches, seven, eight. The pain and humiliation was intense, and the terror, at realizing Jen knew about Johnny, was only making it worse. She had let this machine take her virginity, and now it seemed she was going to let it impale her. “It’s a thirteen inch cock, Kaylee. I switched it out from the five incher that was on it when I came in here. It’s going to destroy your pussy. Johnny’s little six inch dick won’t even be able to feel the sides of your cunt when you give it up at prom.” Nine inches in and still going. The dildo was pressing against her cervix and now began to force its way in deeper. The pain was unbearable, she was stretched wide and deep. “Jen, please stop! I don’t want to go to prom with Johnny. I hate him!” Ten inches. “Oh, is that why you tongue fucked him! It that why you let him grope your fucking melons!” She tugged on the nipple clamps getting Kaylee to scream again. “Is that why you TOLD him he had to break up with me if he wanted to be with you?” “No! Jen, I’m sorry. He kissed me. I was just taken off guard!” Eleven inches of hard plastic cock in her tight body and Kaylee thought she might pass out. She couldn’t believe that Jen was doing this to her. Tears poured down her face. “That’s right, cry you little slut! Tiffany told me she saw you. You kissed him for like five minutes! You clung to him! You let him touch your precious tits! And after all your lectures on how I’m such a slut.” “No, it’s not like that. It was just an accident. I was confused. Please, stop this. Jen, please you’re my best friend.” “Fuck you, Melon! I’m not your goddamn friend. You’re a backstabbing little bitch and I’m going to enjoy destroying your fucking cunt.” With twelve inches of dildo buried inside of her, Kaylee was groaning and couldn’t say anything else. She hadn’t realized she was even able to take so much inside of her. The last inch pushed into her slowly and then the whole machine just stopped. Jen went back to the panel and pressed a few buttons. The dildo began to vibrate inside of her. Jen went to the wall and grabbed a little ribbed clip that she affixed to the dildo so it was pressing up against Kaylee’s clit. The vibrations were driving her crazy. “Don’t do that! Stop it, Jen! This is rape! Get this thing out of me!” “You know what? I’m sick of your lying bitch mouth!” Jen grabbed a harness from the wall, and stepped into it. Kaylee didn’t understand what was happening until Jen clipped an eight inch dildo onto the front of it. She had never even heard of strap-ons, but the purpose of it was self-evident. “Jen, please, we can talk about this. I don’t want Johnny, and you shouldn’t either.” “I love him, bitch! I let him cum in my mouth! And now, he’s telling me how he can’t stop thinking about your fucking tits.” “Please, Jen, please stop this!” The pleasure she was getting from the vibrator in her cunt was finding its way through the pain she was feeling in her nipples and cervix. Her clit was sending wave after wave of sensation through her. Kaylee had never had an orgasm and so she didn’t recognize that the feeling that was building up inside of her was going to be so intense. “Oh fuck, please make it st-“ When her mouth made an O in the word ‘stop’, Jen shoved the strap-on into her mouth. “Guess what, you judgmental little bitch, looks like you do suck dick after all! I just wish I could come down your pretty little throat.” Kaylee’s eyes were wide as Jen pushed inch after inch of the cock into her mouth, not stopping when she gagged. The head of the plastic cock entered her throat and Jen didn’t let up until the fake plastic balls were on Kaylee’s chin. She couldn’t breathe. “Oh my, Kaylee, you’re a natural cocksucker – deep throating it on the first try.” Kaylee really began to panic just as her body released her first orgasm. She was literally thrashing against her restraints, humiliated that she was somehow enjoying this torture, terrified that Jen was going to suffocate her to death, in the most pain she had ever endured. Jen pulled out of her throat, and she gasped for breath and screamed until Jen shoved the dick back into her mouth. Her mouth was fucked furiously for the next several minutes, as orgasm after orgasm coursed through her from the cock in her cunt. “Take it you fucking good for nothing cunt! Suck my dick, Kaylee! I’m going to tell everyone what a great little cocksucker you are – how you can take the whole thing into your throat. Every guy you know is going to try to get his cock in you. Course I’m going to tell them how stretched out and useless your pussy is now.” Kaylee couldn’t believe what was happening to her. Her body was completely betraying her as she came over and over and over. She wanted to die. Eventually, Jen got tired of fucking her throat. “Jen, please, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please stop raping me!” “Raping you? Kaylee, you are cumming almost constantly. Who cums when they’re being raped?” “I don’t want this! I’m saying NO!” “Your mouth says ‘no’ but your pussy is saying ‘yes’. But you know what, I’m sick of listening to you whine.” Jen grabbed a large red ball gag from the wall and affixed it around Kaylee’s head. She now could only moan into her gag. “You’re gonna love this next bit, Kaylee.” Kaylee watched on the monitor as Jen pulled some platforms out from the corners of the box near her feet. Jen stood on these platforms, straddling the evil fucking machine that was embedded in Kaylee’s cunt. To her horror, Kaylee watched Jen line up the strap-on with her asshole. “NNNNNNNNNUU!” Kaylee tried to protest, but the gag was effective. The dildo was only slickened with her own saliva, but Jen managed to get the tip inside her virgin asshole. She screamed silently into her gag as Jen slowly fucked into her. It was surreal feeling a cock in both her pussy and her asshole. And all the while her clit continued to shoot out multiple orgasms. Her whole body was drenched in sweat. “Oh yeah, I’ve got all of it in your ass! What a dirty slut you are, Kaylee. Taking a cock in your asshole and cunt and cumming because you love it!” Kaylee didn’t want to love it – in fact she hated it. She hated the humiliation and betrayal she felt. It was very painful – every part of her was sore. But the reality was that every little thing that Jen did to her made her cum again and again as long as that vibrating cock was inside of her. She had lost count of how many orgasms she had had. Finally, Jen tired of fucking her asshole and pulled out. She came back around to Kaylee’s face. Jen held the cock in one hand and put it up by Kaylee’s nose. She could smell her own shit on the strap-on and tried to pull away from it. “Now, Kaylee, I’m almost ready to stop torturing you. But first, I expect you to clean up my cock. When I take off your gag, I want you to stick your tongue out and lick this ass covered cock clean. If you don’t, I’m going to grab one of those whips and tan your ass until you beg me for the honor of cleaning my dick.” Kaylee shook her head ‘no’, but Jen just unfastened the gag and stuck the strap-on out for her. “Jen, please. Please don’t make me do this.” “Melon, I’m going to fucking hurt you bad if you don’t lick my cock right now!” Kaylee believed her, but she just couldn’t seem to find the nerve to do it. It was so disgusting. Jen got very cross. She went back to the wall again and picked up a large paddle with holes in it. WHACK! “HOLY FUCK! Jen, stop it!” WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! Kaylee screamed as her ass turned bright red with white dots. Jen let her have it a dozen or so times until Kaylee started cumming again. “You are such a slut, Kaylee. You just don’t stop cumming.” “Please stop hitting me! Stop, please! Please, I’ll clean your cock! I’ll lick it! I promise!” Jen moved back to Kaylee’s face and she immediately stuck her tongue out and started licking the shit covered cock. “Tell me you love it. Tell me you love licking your shit off my cock.” “Jen, please. Haven’t I had enough?” “Do you need another spanking, bitch?” Kaylee cringed and kept licking, “MMMM. I love licking my shit off your cock. I love it.” Then she came again. “Well, Kaylee, it seems you are being very selfish. Not only did you steal my boyfriend, but we’ve been having sex for like an hour and you’re the only one who’s came. Before we finish up here, I want you to make me cum.” Jen slipped her bloomers off, and pulled the thong to the side. Kaylee could see her pussy was dripping wet. She couldn’t believe it, Jen was sexually excited by torturing her. She watched as her lifelong friend bent over at the waist and slowly backed up until her snatch was pressed against Kaylee’s mouth. “Jen, no!” Kaylee shut her mouth and tried to turn her head away. “Get your tongue in my cunt right this instant, Kaylee! Don’t make me whip you again!” Kaylee tentatively stuck out her tongue and tasted her best friend’s pussy. It was creamy and sticky, but it wasn’t foul. Jen began moaning as Kaylee lapped at her. “Oh that’s so good, Kaylee. Come on, slut, get your tongue inside me!” Jen forced her friend to lick her pussy and asshole for the next several minutes until finally she crested and had an intense orgasm, filling Kaylee’s mouth with her juices. “Now, will you please get this thing out of me and let me go.” Kaylee was completely sobbing now. “I’m almost done, you fucking bitch.” Jen retrieved another gag from the wall and put the ball into Kaylee’s mouth. She then insert a flexible tube into a hole running through the center of the gag. At the end of the tube she attached a large funnel. Kaylee thought she was beyond being horrified, but her eyes flew open wide again as Jen straddled the funnel and began to piss. “Mr. Johnson would be so proud of me, don’t you think? Putting knowledge into practice like this. Maybe I’ll show him the video.” The poor cheerleader’s mouth flooded with piss – Jen reached down and pinched her nose closed. “Swallow it, slut!” There was no other option, Kaylee had to swallow mouthful after mouthful of piss. Jen began putting things away, switching the funnel gag for a red ball gag again. Then she went back to the wall panel and tapped a few things. Kaylee hoped for a second that Jen was going to release her, but to her chagrin, the dildo inside of her began to fuck her – pulling out almost a full ten inches and then slamming back in. All she could do was grunt in pain as each push slammed into her cervix and caused her tits to bounce pulling against the clamps. Now Jen ignored Kaylee for several minutes while she was mercilessly fucked by the machine. She transferred all the video of their little encounter to an online server and deleted it all from the local server. Then she shut off the cameras. “Kaylee, I’m almost done here. Just be patient a little longer.” Kaylee was busy having yet another orgasm, her whole body twitching as the monster dildo ravaged her. Jen pulled out her cell phone and dialed Kaylee’s house. “Oh, hello Mrs. Stephens. Yes, it’s Jen. Kaylee’s phone died again – I told her to plug it in. I know. I know.” She held the phone away for a moment, “It’s your mom, Kaylee.” She smiled evilly. “Oh, okay. I’ll ask her. Sorry, Mrs. Stephens, Kaylee’s all tied up dealing with Mr. Peters’ baby. Anyway, Johnny and I broke up today and I was hoping you’d let Kaylee stay with me this weekend. Oh yeah, no problem. Yeah, she won’t need any clothes or anything. Toothbrush? Well, I’m sure there’s something around here we can use to clean her mouth out. Yeah, I know, I’m hysterical. Thanks, Mrs. Stephens. What? Oh, well, it seems he’s been cheating on me with some cheap little slut. Yeah. Okay, if I catch her I’ll slap her once for you. Bye.” Jen hung up her phone and then slapped Kaylee as hard as she could right across the face. “Your mom says hi, bitch! Well, Kaylee, it’s time to get home. There’s a lot of video to edit. I’m going to remove myself from all of it. If you go to the police, or try to tell our parents, I’ll send a copy to everyone you know. Everyone will see how easily you cum and how much you love licking shit off of cocks. But if you’re good, I’ll only show it to a few select people.” Kaylee was completely exhausted and although furious at Jen, she was just glad the ordeal was coming to an end. She just wanted to forget about the whole thing – she had no intention of telling anyone. Still the idea of spending the whole weekend with Jen after her rape seemed unthinkable. Did Jen really think they were going to still be friends after this? “Well, see ya at school. By the way, if you show up at cheer practice again or talk to any of our friends, I’ll show this video on the school TV network. Keep your distance.” Kaylee, her pussy still being pounded, watched as Jen walked out of the room. She poked her head back in for a moment, “Oh, don’t worry I’ll hang out until Mr. Peters get back. To make sure Elizabeth is safe. Oh, and I’ll let him know that your folks won’t be missing you until after school on Monday.” Jen left and a moment later the door slid shut and the lights all went out. The machine kept pumping away, occasionally bringing her to another orgasm. All she could do was wait for Mr. Peters to come home and find her. Would he let her go or continue her rape? It was only about forty-five minutes before she found out. -the end-

POSTED BY

TWISTED

AT

5:53 PM

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People, June 29

Cover: Tyler Perry -- We Must Never Give Up 

Page 1: Chatter -- Alicia Keys on the decade being the worst time ever for her, Lizzo responding to fat-shamers, Dax Shepard on isolating with wife Kristen Bell, Victoria Beckham on her quarantine style, Pete Davidson on Marisa Tomei playing his mother in his new movie, Jennifer Garner on her pet chickens keeping her family stocked 

Page 2: 5 Things We’re Talking About This Week -- did SpongeBob come out?, Lori Loughlin won’t appear on Housewives, Disney parks plan to reopen, Dave Chappelle releases a surprise set, Tan France becomes an American 

Page 4: Contents

Page 5: Editor’s Letter 

Page 6: Stars in the Sun -- Rob Lowe boogie boarding in Santa Barbara (full page)

Page 7: Josh Duhamel in Malibu, Alessandra Ambrosio in Malibu, DJ Khaled and his two sons Asahd and Aalam in the pool, Heather Graham in Malibu, Derek Hough went out for a jog 

Page 8: Queen Elizabeth celebrated her 94th birthday with the annual Trooping the Colour ceremony, Brandon Anthony and Tiffany Haddish and Megan Thee Stallion and Common teamed up at a Black Lives Matter protest, Shaun White debuted bleach blonde hair 

Page 9: Chris Hemsworth out for lunch in Byron Bay, Hailey Baldwin and Justin Bieber wore face masks during a bike ride, Dwayne Johnson hits the gym 

Page 10: Fun With Furry Friends -- Emilia Clarke walks her dog Ted in a London park, Jennifer Lopez and daughter Emme and fiance Alex Rodriguez surprised son Max with a puppy, Simone Biles’ workout was interrupted by her two dogs Lilo and Rambo, David Beckham with his family dogs Olive and Fig and Sage, Shia LaBeouf carries his pup, Please Adopt, Don’t Shop 

Page 13: Famous Families -- Arnold Schwarzenegger and son Joseph Baena on a bike ride, Tia Mowry with daughter Cairo and son Cree, Chrissy Teigen had a family tea party with husband John Legend and kids Luna and Miles, David Burtka and husband Neil Patrick Harris and their twins Harper and Gideon, Paris and Nicky Hilton in the Hamptons 

Page 15: The Scoop -- The Bachelor franchise -- demands for diversity onscreen 

Page 16: Meet the new Bachelor Matt James, Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger Pratt celebrate 1 year wedding anniversary 

Page 19: Heart Monitor -- Khloe Kardashian and Tristan Thompson back on?, Winnie Harlow and Kyle Kuzma new couple, Sofia Vergara and Joe Manganiello happy anniversary 

Page 20: Inside the Vanderpump Rules cast shake-up -- Stassi Schroeder and Kristen Doute fired for racist behavior, This Week in People History -- 1997 -- Brad Pitt and Gwyneth Paltrow broke up 

Page 21: Open House -- Kyle Richards’ Bel Air mansion on sale for $5.95 million, why prosecutors want to talk to Prince Andrew 

Page 22: Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom count down to baby 

Page 24: Passages 

Page 27: Stories to Make You Smile -- a dad uses his toddler’s play restaurant to shine a loving light on black-owned businesses, Mayor Murfee a dog raises money and spreads cheer 

Page 29: People Picks -- Love, Victor, One to Watch -- Michael Cimino 

Page 30: Miss Juneteenth

Page 31: Artemis Fowl, The John Legend Concert: A Live Virtual Concert, Into the Dark: Good Boy 

Page 33: Books 

Page 36: Cover Story -- Tyler Perry on seeing hope -- amid a time of tumult Tyler shares his pain, his thoughts for his son and his dream for the nation’s future 

Page 40: 100 Reasons to Love America 

Page 42: American Optimism -- we have an opportunity to do better and be better by Gayle King 

Page 47: The Pace of Medicine -- the coronavirus pandemic has sparked innovations in medicine and vaccine development by Dr. Sanjay Gupta 

Page 55: The American Dream Job -- despite the current turmoil in our nation the space program reminds us what’s possible by Jessica Meir 

Page 66: George Floyd Laid to Rest -- feeling pain, finding purpose -- an emotional Houston funeral unites mourners pleading for change even as yet another black man is killed in Atlanta 

Page 74: Kelly Clarkson and Brandon Blackstock -- inside their shocking split -- after nearly seven years and two kids Kelly files for divorce from the man she has long called the one 

Page 78: Shattered Hopes, a Shocking Arrest -- deadly secrets -- after months of searching authorities finally find Lori Vallow’s missing children Joshua and Tyree buried in her husband Chad Daybell’s yard 

Page 82: Kevin Costner -- I Don’t Take Anything for Granted -- he opens up about his love for family, his path in Hollywood and his hopes for the future 

Page 86: Scott Turner Schofield -- Boldly Living His Truth -- the first transgender man nominated for a daytime Emmy opens up about his journey 

Page 88: Sixteen years ago when Terri Herrington’s husband died suddenly she donated one of his kidneys to Jeff Granger and when that kidney began failing last year she gave him one of her own and saved his life again 

Page 92: My Life as a Dad -- Ron Howard and Bryce Dallas Howard 

Page 94: Kenan Thompson, real-life hero dads 

Page 95: Patton Oswalt 

Page 97: The Royals’ Secret Weapon -- Sophie, Countess of Wessex -- the mom of 2 and confidant to the queen quietly steps up to fill the void left by Prince Harry and Meghan Markle 

Page 100: Gabriel Iglesias from salesman to comedy superstar -- the former quiet kid turned his knack for making people laugh into a booming career but his journey hasn’t always been easy 

Page 104: Country singer Chuck Wicks baby joy after male infertility -- the musician and wife Kasi open up about their struggle to have a child and reveal they’re now expecting 

Page 109: Summer TV Preview -- Matthew Rhys redefining an icon Perry Mason 

Page 110: Merle Dandridge -- a bittersweet farewell from Greenleaf

Page 111: Yvonne Strahovski from Handmaid’s Tale to Stateless

Page 112: Bryan and Sarah Baeumler of Renovation Island

Page 117: Style -- swimsuit season -- Nina Dobrev 

Page 119: Your beauty questions answered 

Page 121: The Crises of 2020 -- High Anxiety: Tips for Coping -- how to manage the challenges testing everyone’s mental health this year 

Page 131: Second Look -- Rob Gronkowski of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and James Corden take center court in L.A. Lakers gear for Game On! 

Page 132: One Last Thing -- John Lithgow