#I held off voicing this for a season because I didn't want to judge the transitional season before I saw where it transitioned to

[junonureyev]

I finished season 4 and subsequently I have more thoughts about season 3 in comparison.

I did not like season 3 when it originally aired, I get why they formatted it like that in hindsight, and I loved listening to the season, but my criticism with it at the time and still now is the non-emphasis on Junos more healthy period is so fucking weird, thematically. Because the fact we don't see any of Juno's very important kind-of recovery period weakens the overall message about mental health. Junos life now includes 6 people as main characters of it, which I like the concept of them then being important enough to get the narrator spot but I feel like season 3 was what season 2 was building up to, and now that we had it, to see Junos full payoff we delay it for a season? The pacing is fucked, I think. I love season 3 to death but the pacing of it for both Jupeter and Junos relationship to himself is fucked. It's probably the biggest criticism I have of Juno Steel because parts where my attention wains and things are either a bit tedious or boring is absolutely nothing compared to the fact we never get to see the big payoff for Juno Steel the character when we need to see it.

[phoxey]

Abandoned

Monika Shin x fem!reader

cw: a good mix of suggestiveness and angst, also age gap (legal ofc) MDNI

words: 1393

AN: please be gentle with me, i'm just starting out as a writer, also this is not proofread

It has been quite a while since you have seen her. Monika, your teacher, your friend, your everything. You left PROWDMON right before the first season of Street Woman Fighter started. You never explained why. You just sent her a quick text, stating that you leave PROWDMON and Korea, that you are sorry and that she shouldn't contact you, because you would be travelling the world. You blocked her and the entire crew after that.

The reason? You were madly in love with her. But she was your teacher. She was ten years older than you. She was not gay. It pained you to always hear her talk about her wanting a man, a husband. You had tried to confess your feelings multiple times, but she always took your confessions in a friendly and sisterly way. After a while you just gave up.

You left Korea, like you said, and travelled the world, participating in dance battles everywhere and gave dance classes, mainly in America. Thats where you met Audrey and through her you joined Jam Republic Agency, who called you up when they were forming a team for Street Woman Fighter season 2. Your heart longed to go back to Korea, so you agreed.

You were happy until the judges were introduced.

"...PROWDMONs Leader: Monika!", Kang Daniel said.

You looked up in shock. And there she was. As beautiful as ever... and as unreachable as ever. She smiled and looked around, just before your eyes met, you lowered your gaze to the ground, trying to keep your tears from welling up. You swallowed hard and put on an annoyed and arrogant face as you felt her eyes on you. The dance battles started and you tried to ignore her presence, to have fun. You battled against Chocol, a friend from way back, Monika had introduced you two many years ago. You heard the voices behind you.

"She dances just like Monika-sseam."

"You can see that she spend a lot of time with Monika-ssaem."

"Y/N left PROWDMON right before Street Woman Fighter, do you think they fought?"

You kept your eyes on Shownu, when the judges showed their cards. One for Chocol, one for you... and Monika held both cards up, refusing to decide. You looked up from her cards to her face, and her gaze pierced you. It was as though she could look into your soul. There were so many emotions and questions in her eyes. She was an open book to you, she has always been. But what stunned you was, when her eyes suddenly became dark and cold, almost hateful. You didn't even realize for a precious ten seconds that the rematch with Chocol had begun, due to the tie. Not dancing for a solid ten seconds, earned you a 3:0 loss.

"What was up?", Kirsten asked worriedly, as the break begun.

You shook your head. "I don't want to talk about it.... I think i need to be alone for a moment."

You stood up, gave her a half smile and then walked to the bathrooms. You threw some water into your face and tried to calm down, you almost didn't recognize your own face in the mirror. Absently you dried off and turned around to go back to your team, but you stopped abruptly. Monika leaned, arms crossed, against the door, staring at you and you were sure, she wouldn't move.

The two of you just stared at eachother in silence for a little eternity. Your heart beat so loud that you were afraid she would hear it.

"Hey...", you cracked a fake smile, you wanted to sound like someone meeting an old friend, only the finger guns were missing.

"Don't 'Hey' me.", she just said coldly and took a step towards you.

You took a step back. "What?"

"Funny meeting you here, after you abandoned us."

"I didn't leave PROWDMON because I was afraid of being on SWF.", you said. "And abandoned is a harsh word."

"Is it now? What would you call it then? It surely wasn't a friendly seperation."

God, why was she so beautiful when she was angry? You could barely concentrate on your answers.

You bit your lip nervously. "Look. This is just how things had to be. I would have destroyed everything if I stayed."

"What on earth are you talking about?"

She had walked you so far back that your back hit the cold tiles of the bathroom wall. But now you were annoyed that you rolled your eyes. How could such a smart woman be this oblivious?

"I have told you a hundred times, why. If you still don't connect the dots, that's on you.", you huffed.

She seemed to think and with every passing second your heart broke into piece after piece. Hot and silent tears rolled down your cheeks. She still didn't understand a thing.

"I love you.", you whispered, but in the silence between you it seemed like you had screamed it.

"What?"

"I have always loved you. And I probably always will. Not as a student. Not as a friend. It's not admiration nor fondness. It is love. I suffered, knowing you could never feel the same for me. Every hug, every kiss on the cheek, every time you brushed my hair after a dance session, it felt so good that I wanted it again and again, but it also hurt so much every time. I can't have you, and I didn't want to watch you find a man and become happy with him. I'm selfish like that. So before I ruin everything for you, I left. There you have it, that's the reason."

"You love me?", she asked, and her eyes fell to your lips. That gaze alone made you throw all logic and reason overboard. You grabbed her face and pressed your lips to hers. To your surprise she didn't push you away as you put all your longing into the kiss, all the words you couldn't possibly say. After a moment the kiss faded out and you parted.

"I'm sorry...", you whispered.

"I should apologize...", she whispered back. "I think I always knew... but I was afraid..."

"What? You knew? Afraid of what?", you asked and blinked in confusion.

"Afraid to admit that I feel the same.", Monika said then.

You widened your eyes. Were you dreaming? This couldn't be reality. To test it, you turned her around and pressed her to the wall. "What do you mean, you feel the same?"

"I love you... sorry, that I only realize it now."

"Really?"

"Yes. But I don't think I would be a good partner for you.", she said but you weren't even listening anymore, you just pulled her into a kiss.

"...Y/N... I'm too old for you...", she almost moaned between kisses.

"Don't care...", you said, as your lips moved to her neck.

"what would the others think...?", she tried to argue.

"Don't care...", you said again, as your lips captured hers into a kiss.

You felt her smirk against your lips. "You're unbelievable."

Finally she gave in to her desires and kissed you back with the same passion, invading your mouth with her tongue. You melted into the kiss, your hands all over her body. You lifted her onto the counter with the sinks and stood between her legs, your fingers digging into her thighs.

She emerged first from the bathroom and went to get her make up refreshed. You did the same. The make up staff gave you a weird look when they saw something on your neck.

Kirsten looked at you weird, when you came back. "Girl, where were you? I was so worried!"

You just sat down and smirked.

"Apparently she had a good time.", Ling mused and pointed to a faint dark spot under a heavy load of concealer.

"A hickey????", Kirsten almost screamed.

"Shut the fuck up! There are cameras!", you hissed.

"Who did that? It's so big!", Kirsten whispered.

You smirked. "If you think that's a lot, then you should see her thighs..."

"Her thighs? Who?", Ling asked and followed your not so subtle gaze to Monika, who already sat with the other judges again and happily conversed with them. Her lap was covered with a blanket. She would say, it's because of her short skirt.

But we all know the real reason, don't we?

[creative-kny-fics]

hihihiuhiiui!!!!! i really want some sanegiyuu tickles, maybe with lee!giyuu and ler!sanemi? and you can choose the scenario

feel free to decline!!

I like SaneGiyuu, so yes 😻 (The premiere of the new season is approaching, so in honor of that... Remember that there is a scene where Giyuu and Sanemi fight with wooden swords? Well...)

Ler: Sanemi Shinazugawa

Lee: Giyuu Tomioka

'Well... It could have been worse... Giyuu-San will probably give me a talk of respect for what I did... I deserve it, I guess...', he gave a sigh and raised his head, he didn't lack a lot to get to.

He was nervous, with previous training he already had an idea of how tough and difficult it was to become a hashira, even if Giyuu had some appreciation for him, he couldn't confuse those feelings.

This was the battlefield, not one of those talks they often had on weekends or during the days off they had.

'What is that sound?', he ran over and hid behind some bushes, he tried not to make noise, he didn't want to be discovered.

The voices were clear, they were Sanemi and Giyuu, they were training with... Wooden swords?

It was incredible, he didn't remember if he had seen anything like it before. 'Alright... It's time to use our fists until-!'

'WAIT WAIT WAIT!!', Tanjiro came out of his hiding place and stood in front of Giyuu, making Sanemi retreat. 'Damn, I'm not supposed to be around you... What are you doing here Kamado?'

'I came to train with Giyuu-San, but it seems you two haven't finished training yet. But I won't allow you two to fight using fists! Aren't there supposed to be fights between hunters and hashiras...?', Sanemi and Giyuu looked at each other and sighed, nodding.

'What do you plan for us to do?! Let's play rock, paper, scissors to decide who won!? Oh I know! Let's have a tickle fight and the first one to shout "uncle" is the winner!'

'It's not a bad idea...'

'I'm being sarcastic, I'd rather die than let this idiot touch me...'

Sanemi didn't plan on staying there any longer, mainly because he remembered that neither he nor Tanjiro could be in the room. same place together.

Giyuu and Tanjiro watched Sanemi walk away, after seeing each other for a while, Giyuu patted Tanjiro's head. 'Don't worry, Tanjiro, don't worry about Shinazugawa, apparently he's too much of a coward to agree to that...'

Sanemi stopped, turning around and almost running towards Giyuu to grab him by his uniform tightly. 'What the fuck did you just say...?'

'What you heard. I'm not going to repeat it twice, now if you'll excuse me, I have to train with Tanjiro. We will see the winner in the next training session...'

'Ooooh of course not! Do you want a fucking tickle fight?! WELL YOU'LL HAVE A FUCKING TICKLE FIGHT!!'

Giyuu opened his eyes a little, surprised, but agreed, asking Tanjiro to step aside and let him be the judge, so he must have been paying close attention.

'Alright, the first one to make the other scream for mercy or shout "uncle" is the winner. You better pay attention Kamado!' 'Y-yes! Well... Eeeeh... Start! I guess...?'

Tanjiro had to cover his eyes, sand was getting in, he couldn't see anything, he only heard the footsteps of both hashiras around him, running in circles and then walking away.

He rubbed his eyes and the sight was better, Giyuu was running backwards, crouching or jumping when Sanemi got close enough to him and tried to grab or push him. 'HAH! DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU WILL WIN TOMIOKA?! I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!'

'You shouldn't be too trusting...', Giyuu held Sanemi by the shoulders, using one of his legs to "sweep" him, managing to knock Sanemi down and straddle his hips.

Tanjiro dropped his jaw, everything was so fast, a few seconds ago he saw both of them trying to throw each other to the ground and now, it seemed that there was a clear winner.

Sanemi was also surprised, but there was a huge difference, well, maybe it wasn't that much, but unlike Giyuu, Sanemi has been an older brother and it is not the first time that he has had to "teach a lesson" to the one who tried to tickle him. . 'Alright, go ahead, this is a fight, right? Let's see if you can tickle me properly... IF I DO THIS!!'

In one quick movement, Sanemi brought his hands to Giyuu's armpits, laughing when his arms were next to his torso, trying to prevent him from tickling him.

Even Tanjiro noticed how Giyuu was fighting his smile, hugging himself, shaking his head. 'There is! What's happening?! You already had me! Come on Tomioka! Fight against me!'

'T-thihis is che-eheating...!! I-it wahas supposed to... GRK!! We were su-pposed to use breahaths...!!', big mistake...

A malicious smile formed on Sanemi's face, when Giyuu's gaze made contact with his, he knew that Sanemi had understood his message, but of course wrong way.

Before he could say anything, the position changed, from being above him, immobilizing him, to being below him. 'WAITWAITWAIT-!!'

'Oooooh now you're screaming?! PERFECT!! PBBBBBT!!', a long raspberry was left on Giyuu's neck.

He had a chance, Sanemi wasn't holding him that tightly, so he could counterattack! Both hands began to tickle Sanemi's ribs, trying to get him to loosen his grip, but he couldn't. 'T-this is incredible... Shinazugawa-San doesn't even seem to flinch!'

'Aaaaw, are you trying to fight back~? I'm afraid you won't be able to~', he sang before grabbing Giyuu by the wrists and pressing them to the ground.

Another raspberry, but this time in his tummy, Giyuu was glad that at least the uniform lessened the sensations a little... 'Mmmm, you're laughing a lot, but you're not begging!', well, at least the uniform helped in the first round of raspberries.

Giyuu's eyes widened, this time there was no way, as if that were not enough, Sanemi had freed his wrists just to be able to accompany the tortuous sensation of the raspberries with some squeezes on his sides that went down to his hips and up to his lower ribs.

'SHINAHAZUGAHAWAAA!! STOHOHOHOP!!!'

'You said we should fight using breaths, that's what we're doing, right?! Besides, you agreed to the conditions, if you want me to stop, ask for mercy or shout "uncle", otherwise I won't stop~', Sanemi turned his gaze towards Tanjiro who nodded, they were the rules and they couldn't change them.

But Giyuu didn't plan to let Sanemi defeat him like that, he tried to stop his hands, prevent the raspberry from being deposited on his exposed belly, try to kick him somewhere and thus get some advantage, nothing helped.

'Well, I guess I should be more cruel then... I've been being very gentle with you...', 'gentle'?! If that was being gentle, he didn't imagine what it was to be cruel.

Before he could even get some air, Sanemi turned Giyuu over, sitting on his calves, laughing in anticipation as Giyuu began to struggle to pick him up or turn around. 'What's happening? Don't you want me to tickle you here~? Well, as I repeat, I want to win, so if you don't want me to tickle you here, give up!'

Giyuu's response was a growl. 'NEVER!!!', that was his sentence.

'Poor Giyuu-San...', Tanjiro whispered as he watched Giyuu desperately hit the floor, sometimes covering his mouth to stop the laughter from coming out. 'THIHIHIS IS SO UNFAHAHIHIHIR!! I CAHAHAHAN'T MOHOVEHEHE!!!'

'Is it that bad~? And what do you think will happen if I take your socks away? I guess there's only one way to find out...~'

In one quick movement, both socks were almost half off, leaving his heels exposed, was Sanemi making fun? Yes, he was... He was enjoying watching Giyuu squeeze his toes, making the futile effort to keep his socks in place, but it all went down the drain when he felt a pinch beneath them.

'I think...' 'Hey Kamado, I want you to time how long it took to make this bastard scream for mercy!', Tanjiro nodded, starting to count.

Giyuu howled with laughter, the force of his punches increasing, covering his face as he stifled his laughter, making Sanemi angrier.

'So... I win~?', he received no response... 'Alright then...'

'AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! PLEHAHASEHEHE!!! Y-YOHOHOU WIHIHIN!! N-NO MORE!! UNCLE!! UHUNCLEHEHEHE!!!' 'Hah! So you can't tolerate tickling under your toes, huh?!'

Tanjiro stood up and took a breath, declaring Sanemi the winner of this peculiar tickle fight. Sanemi bowed and walked away, smiling proudly, leaving Giyuu lying on the floor as he tried to catch his breath.

'Giyuu-San... Is everything okay...?', he nodded, turning around and looking at the sky. Apparently, the training he and Tanjiro would have had to wait a few minutes...

[dyed-red]

I voted for priest Sam hair! Not only because it was the correct choice, but, hey, bribery! So for a mini Dickey, a choice between outsider POV of the boys being weird about each other or late seasons domestic!Winchesters? If neither of those work for you, write something you like 😁

I love that my bribery accomplished nothing, because everyone taking me up on the offer is someone who was already going to (or already had) vote for the correct choice anyway :D truly net zero impact on the poll, which is likely for the best.

and ahh, i do love both outsider PoV and domestic!chesters, so this is good. and in my typical fashion, my answer is:

Set after 12x11, "Regarding Dean".

They're very beautiful boys is the thing. Well, not the thing, but certainly part of it. Rowena thinks that anyone would be hard-pressed to judge her somewhat embarrassing lack of self-preservation in this regard, if they too got to experience the full effect of Sam Winchester imperious gaze or Dean's intermittently roguish and boyish smiles.

That or, like so many before her, she truly just did contract Winchester Derangement Syndrome. Oh well.

She'd wanted to skirt out of town quickly, after helping fix up Dean's memory. It would be the prudent thing to do. But it was also an opportunity, one that might not drop into her lap quite so easily again anytime soon, to get a read on the brothers without being observed herself. One had to wonder how they did it, held the world together with duck tape and a can-do attitude, considering how ordinary and brutish they'd seemed at first.

Well. Maybe not entirely brutish. Sam's command of Latin and spellwork had always intrigued her. But that was neither here nor there, and he wasn't accomplished enough a spellcrafter to see through the glamour that she wove around herself -- an angling and aging of the face, a darkening and straightening of the hair, a thinning of the lips and tinting to the eyes. Enough that, with an outfit passably dull, she could opposite to them in the pub where they made their way for dinner and rest before they'd set out in the morning. A quiet place on the outskirts of town, locals trudging work boots in and tired or sore from the day. Sam and Dean fit right in. They seemed to fit in most anywhere they went.

Better chameleons than even her glamour could afford her. A few hundred years and Rowena wasn't sure she'd perfected the art of invisibility as well as two men gorgeous enough to be on magazine covers. That was something.

She'd followed them in, waited across the parking lot, and wondered if Dean had injured himself somehow on the day's misadventures. She didn't recall anything, not much action except for at the end there, otherwise just Sam pasting sticky notes to objects and Dean becoming cuter and more bearable by the minute. She didn't recall anything, but Sam's hand never strayed from Dean's back as they made their way across the lot, and Dean never shrugged it off.

By the time she slipped inside, found herself a stool at a table with a view of their booth, they were seated across from one another. She'd never noticed, never bothered to, how far their legs stretched under a table, tangled up into each other's foot-space. At her height, not an issue she had frequently. But Sam was leaned back, fingers on the table, leg, ankle jostling against Dean's calf underneath it. He looked relaxed, and something in Rowena's chest eased at seeing it.

The curse was properly fixed then. Of course she wouldn't wait around in town just to be sure, she wasn't their minder and anyway she'd been certain it was fixed before they parted ways. Still though, confirmation never rankled.

Dean looked around and Rowena turned her gaze to the bland offerings on the menu and in her peripheral she heard his voice, not the words, and then Sam's laughter, loud and startled for a moment then quieter.

When she glanced over, Dean was grinning, leaned in, and Sam's face was so fond her own stomach felt a little gurgly, as if caterpillars (never butterflies) might take up residence.

There was a motion, quick dart, and Sam's hand was on Dean's. Overtop, maybe on his wrist. Rowena's caterpillars turned to lead -- waited with bated breath as their waitress came over and they separated, expressions shifting quick like guilty schoolboy -- and then burst forth into winged insects instead, fluttering around her insides. She bit the inside of her cheek, eyes alight, and ignored the moths taking up residence inside of her.

Well, that was something then.

It wasn't all that scandalous, that kind of sin. Proscribed by the law of every place and time, but something you saw a time or twenty if you lived long enough. It wasn't as if she hadn't suspected. Her imaginings had been more brutal though, more teeth gnashing end-of-world anger with each other, clinging and messy and mad with it. Hand touches across the tables and -- the memory surfaced from earlier in the day -- delighted grins over the potential for a front row seat to some 'live skinemax', that hadn't been what she'd conjured up.

And oh, to be the live entertainer with Sam, to have pleasure made into a show for Dean's affections. Too bad Sam had to be so focused on fixing his brother, they could have had some real fun that afternoon. She certainly wouldn't have complained.

She ordered something herself, a salad and, because life was short, two types of dessert to follow. If there was some thing cold-blooded American capitalism had done right, it was egregiously portioned and delectably indulgent desserts.

The brothers ate, and laughed, and sighed across their bench from each other, seeming weary but well. Ordinary, but far from it. Their legs tangled deeper into each other's space. Dean's fingers drummed an absent pattern, no doubt from one of those rock bands he liked, and Sam nudged him with his leg and directed him to where some dart boards were setup. They brushed shoulders and elbowed each other, were close enough for her to catch snatches of their conversation. Teasing, mostly. Challenging, boyish one-upmanship. Flirting, quite obviously, when Sam's voice dropped to growl something in Dean's ear she couldn't catch, the tone of which had her stomach swooping anyway.

They left not long after, when her second dessert arrived. A little flavourless, in comparison. She left without bothering to finish, left town that night without dawdling any longer. The boys were good, and were comforting each other, and they owed her one. The rest was between them.

[latentillusion]

introducing my psycho-pass oc! brought to life by @catyypss 💜 i haven't fully fleshed out the details, but here's what we (i) know about her so far!

⤷ kogami's twin sister ⤷ honestly, i haven't given her a name yet. 😂 ⤷ originally an actress/singer (i actually wanted to explore what celebrities were like in a sybil world, but then season 3 came out and we did get to see that! how cool!) ⤷ BUT she became an inspector once her brother was demoted ⤷ (she really wanted to protect her brother! 😭 and she thought this was the best way to help him since he wouldn't have access to everything anymore.) ⤷ respects her brother a lot and looks up to him (they have a good relationship!) ⤷ also went to high school with kogami & ginoza ⤷ as kids, kogami tried to make her a bookworm but homegirl just... would not. (definitely teased her about it.) ⤷ people assume she's not that booksmart but she ranked above average at school & she has a sharp memory (it helped her a lot as a performer, but if she showed off a little while investigating -- can't blame a girl) ⤷ kogami & ginoza were both concerned when she said she'd become an inspector. kogami was much more quick to accept it (he trusts his sister a lot), whereas ginoza was much more upset ⤷ relatively good at maintaining her hue (learned a lot of stress management as a celebrity) ⤷ among the enforcers, she and yayoi chat a lot about music (though their tastes are very different), and maybe she and masaoka came up with ideas to tease gino ⤷ she's honestly not sure what to make of the sybil system, especially post-season 1; it's a system that judged both her brother and her friend (ginoza) so harshly. she knows they're both good people, so how fair can it all be? ⤷ personality-wise, i think she's level-headed and headstrong (would also be the type to stop bullying, with her words not her fists), she's charming and knows it, and growing up around kogami's teasing, she also loves to have fun and use her wit in her own way ⤷ post season 1 idea? she becomes a reporter or journalist (i just love the yayoi & oc team agenda!) to focus on elevating unheard voices, particularly of people sybil would try to otherwise ignore or disapprove of (very big immigrants rights activist in dejima once japan opened borders) i also think she would be so cool as a spy...

oc and ginoza ⤷ ginoza was interested in her when they were in school (come on, she's super pretty!), but i hc that he didn't feel confident asking her out (and has likely super tsundere about his feelings this whole time) ⤷ he DID support her during school plays/shows ⤷ i think oc was also intrigued by this serious guy from the get-go and soon developed her own crush, but because of her career, maybe she didn't have time for romance either ⤷ they were still good friends all throughout school and into adulthood (ginoza would attend oc's shows/premieres and bring flowers!) ⤷ UNTIL kogami's demotion ⤷ as much as he respects his best friend and as much as he cares about oc, he just doesn't think it's a good idea for her to enter the mwpsb for a reason like this (she doesn't realize what she's getting herself into) ⤷ let's say they're just disgruntled partners for a while (but gino's a softie; he's not going to stay mad forever!) ⤷ BECAUSE I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP!!1!!! ⤷ given ginoza's personality pre/during s1, i think she would have to be the one to pursue him a little ⤷ but once he's demoted, nothing else matters, the floodgates open, and he tells her his feelings ⤷ i think because the two of them already cared a lot about each other before the timing was right, it would be emotional when they first get together (oc wants ginoza to be happy and want more for himself, ginoza wants to cherish and be good to the person he's held at arms length for so long) -- not sure if they tried dating before and it failed, and then tried again after ginoza becomes an enforcer, or if they try for the first time only after he's an enforcer. either way, the road is very long and filled with pining.

i know i've typed a lot, but i feel like i've left a lot of holes in her story. i mean, she doesn't even have a name yet... how can i name her ship?!?!?

i really want to develop her former life as an actress/idol more! (particularly, a darker story, like a crime happening at her agency or something?) give her some work-related trauma.

i also want to explore her naïveté, with how she decided to become an inspector. obviously, she passed the requirements, but does she have the heart? can she pull the trigger? what's gonna be her "oh shit" moment? (she needs PLENTY!!)

other minor things: ⤷ it was meeting akane that made her realize the way she supported her brother wasn't what was healthiest for him and his mind. she respects her a lot! ⤷ she really loves cute people! so she really wants to be a big sis to characters like mika, kei, arata, etc. (naturally, she thought baby gino was ADORABLE)

some future ideas i want to focus on: ⤷ how does she separate herself from her brother? ⤷ would she and gino even work as a couple? (too late, they gotta since i already commissioned art of them. LOL)

that's all she wrote (for now). if you see this, please help me come up with a name. i want it to be pretty! ;-;

[terrence-silver]

Can you do a dialogue exchange between Terry and Kreese in current times? Kreese calls Terry from jail to express his distaste for what he did at the end of season 4.

—

-"Do you know about the myth of Gilgamesh and Enkidu, John?"-

That's the first thing Terry opens up with on the open phone line, calling from the study of his mansion, a colossal window overlooking the stormy sea, the forecast promised a hurricane in the making forming over The Valley, but no matter --- he has to chuckle when he hears John's gruff, irritated voice. The guards were paid off to keep an eye out for him. Make certain he's not disturbed. Not bothered. Pestered by some worthless lowlife punk. Not that John couldn't take care of himself. Terry held him in too much esteem to believe he needed any protection. Added bonus was ensuring he's allowed extra telephone hours. He called John. He took the reigns into his own hands he called him first. He knew John wouldn’t. That he’d be too busy brooding. That he was the overly proud sort. Man wouldn’t ask for a cup of water if he was dying of thirst.

-"What are you talking about, Terry?"-

-"Gilgamesh and Enkidu, John. The Sumerian tablets."-

Terry reiterates, firmly but patiently. His own parents ensured he got a classical education back in the days, but he understood John never had that special privilege due to a less than stable family situation, so even now he choose to be gentle with him and explain. John would be forced to hear him out. The guards on his payroll were tasked with that special agenda. -"Listen, if you had me called out here to fuck with me, I..."- Pissed off, was he? Good, good. Terry could handle John's wrath, hate, anger and even bitterness, because emotions were still emotions, whether good or bad, but Terry couldn't handle John vaguely caring for someone else, so he cuts him off on the spot, momentarily talking over him as the wind outside howls. Sky blackened. It was a little past two in the afternoon, but it could've been twilight judging by the disposition of the ocean's vista. -"Enkidu was jealous and fearful that Humbaba will supplant him in Gilgamesh's affections."- Terry's voice is calm, even to his own ears. He's been cold as needle in the past few weeks since John's arrest.

He dismissed almost all of his staff, his maids and chefs and cleaners.

Kept only the basics of maintenance. Terry wanted to be alone.

Terry wanted to think, undisturbed and unfettered by nonsense.

-"How funny is that? That a two thousand year old poem about gods and titans carved on stone tables somewhere in the desert still holds weight today. The world has changed so much. Has it really, though? People were always people. Since time immemorial."- He leans back into the leather seat of his rotating chair, legs crossed. Through some introspection he realized he wasn't envious of Johnny Lawrence because of Johnny Lawrence per se. No, no. Terry was envious of the act of sharing space in someone's head and heart with someone else. John was meant to be his, in a way a boy's first hero is always his. In a way a best friend is supposed to be only his. In a way a companion and a comrade and a compatriot is meant to be his. Terry loved John in several ways. Philia. Storge. Ludus. Pragma. Eros. He supposed if John had a pet or animal he gave attention to, Terry would simply wring the beast's neck with his bare hands. It couldn't be helped. It was the survival of the fittest.

Love was inherently morbid.

Anyone who claimed different was selling something --- selling snake oil.

Or simply didn't love enough.

-"Does the fucking poem also include friends setting up trumped up charges?"- John asks and his tone is reeling with the clear sounds of being royally pissed off and Terry closes his eyes and smiles, almost tempted to go into the allegorical motifs of the poem, yet he doesn't. That was lovely, though. That ire. Even John's righteous anger was a good thing to hear. He enjoyed John's anger more than someone's happiness. More than most people's happiness, actually. -"The ancients did far worse than that, Johnny. C'mon, you should know that! Hell, we weren’t ancients and we did much worse back in ‘Nam!"- He chuckles into the phone, pondering Kings killing their firstborn, the rape of the Medusa, Zeus swallowing his first wife, Sisyphus pushing the rock. That and Napalming villages. The characters of legends didn't much more messed up things than jailtime or roughing someone up in a dojo. -"Do you wanna know how the poem ends?"- Terry inquires, feeling chatty today, idly playing with a silver fountain pen on his desk. -"Gilgamesh and Enkidu kill the Bull of Heaven after which the gods decide to sentence Enkidu to death and murder him."- He adds as a way of metaphor. The line of palm trees along the Malibu coastline sway in unison against a bleak firmament. The rumbling of distant thunder rings out in his ears.

-"You're fucking high."-

John shoots back through a hoarse, husky murmur.

Terry can hear the breathing of one of wardens through the line.

Discreetly ensuring John stays put during these conversations like they were instructed.

-"Completely clean, Captain. Wide awake too. Unreasonable to write off everything I do to substance abuse, don't you think? Robs me of my agency, as they say."- Terry has to smile yet again, repeating his (now fired) therapist's words from years prior, this time, through the context of mockery. Truth is, he loved most of what he did. The crack and the pot and the alcohol were merely a cherry atop of an already existing, layered cake. The rest was sprinkling. -"The second half of the epic distresses over Enkidu's death and it causes Gilgamesh to undertake a long and perilous journey to discover the secret of eternal life."- He adds and though he’s aware that in spite of the in education levels, John's an extremely smart man. In that common-sense, logical, self-taught, streetwise kind of way he's always admired and coveted more than any of the foppish, pretentious, diploma educated Harvard and UCLA assholes he's ever surrounded himself with, Terry knew that Joh understood, fundamentally, what Terry was attempting to relay, but just in case, he reiterates once he the other end of the line falls silent; -"I'm a jealous man, John. Always have been. Told you to let sleeping dogs lie and you didn’t listen to me."- He throws in a bit of self-awareness there. It was what it was. His own character and disposition was known to him. When Terry cared for people, he knew it turned him a bit unhinged. That's why he kept himself emotionally sterilized for thirty years and entertained people he couldn't care less about if he tried. It was...cleaner. Antiseptic. Easier to manage. It wasn't very business-like to get attached and compromise oneself in the process. Make a fool out of oneself for others.

But, this wasn't clean.

This was messy. Disorganized.

This was Gilgamesh butchering the Bull of Heaven and splitting his entrails into stars.

-"Your Lieutenant would kill for you. Do the unthinkable for you."-

Terry utters and he swears he hears John suppress a gasp.

It was always notorious, whenever John Kreese was slightly afraid.

Why? Because it was so rare to witness. To see. To experience.

The stoic, rigorous, strong John, a tad bit perturbed by him.

Beautiful.

-"And I will. Because you belong to me."-

If he couldn’t be John’s weakness the way John was his ---

He supposed he’d simply have to terminate whoever fucking was.

White neon lighting slashes across the sky as Terry makes a promise, no less poignant than 'I owe you, man. For everything you need. Your whole life.' made by a whimpering, skinny boy out in the jungle who spoke with his heart, almost fifty years ago. Half a century. How insane was that? There was no Johnny Lawrence then. No Daniel Larusso. None of this Lawrence-Diaz-Larusso-Keene-Nichols-Miyago Do-Eagle Fang fuckfest. No dojo rivalries. No masks. No pretense. No baggage. No scorn. No decades of absences. No separations. No misunderstandings. No rifts between them. No diverse agendas. No bullshit. There was just him and John Kreese and a great, big snake pit --- they were both likeminded vipers in it from that day forward. Terry ends the call before his Captain can say anything, but by the sounds of it, he was rendered speechless. He'd be safely tucked away and out of the way while incarcerated, that was for certain. It was only practical. Only good strategizing. The beach is windswept when Terry steps outside, suit, polished shoes and all, against the warning of his disturbed seeming maintenance guy collecting the plush seating arrangements from the backyard with some assistants drenched in the maelstrom, and Terry lets the purifying drops of water wash him clean as he leans his head back towards the stormy, tumultuous sky.

[aphrodite-would-be-proud]

Anon said: tried to read through all your request rules, but I didnt specifically see which Characters you write for. If you do, could you write for Porco helping his S/o sleep? I have super bad insomnia most days, and I just really want something fluffy with Porco...just cuddles or stories or something. If you dont write for Porco though could you switch it with a AoT character you do write for, I'm not really picky. Thank you so much in advance! 🥺💗

Porco helping you sleep

{Porco x reader | tw:none | sleep help, fluff | canon }

{ "The Night School" C.1660-C.1665 By Gerrit Dou 1613-1675 }

Unmoving shadows cast into the empty white walls, slightly flickering with the flame on the white candle sitting on the nightstand. Half lidded eyes observe their small movements for they're the only interesting thing in this empty hotel room you've been assigned. 

Your beige uniform tucked into the small closest with a single hanger inside, the armband hanging on the closest door for easy reach. The squeak of the spring mattress chirping up whenever you moved to flip your too stiff pillow. 

Judging by the amount of melted wax collecting on the bottom of the candle, you've been awake for far too long. 

This isn't the first time this has happened, you're used to getting acquainted with the room's walls and shadowy furniture.

Sleep has abandoned you long ago, its friend insomnia visiting you daily instead. Only leaving every week or so to remind you of what you could never have, taunting almost.

You've tried to force yourself to sleep really, did every known trick in the book, you even tried mediation like Zeke has been preaching to you about, but to no avail. so you've started making peace with the thing, you know at least using the night time to get things done since you're not getting rest either way.

Books were your first friend, for staring at the walls could only be entertaining for so long, but now with your stash of books miles away back home, you're left with nothing else to do.

The nightstand drawer only contained an emergency gun with several bullets inside, and the pocket knife under your pillow wasn't interesting enough.

Getting up from the bed, you picked up the candle before slowly inching the creaky door open. Maybe a glass of water could help, who cares that this is your third time going for water in the last hour? Well hydration is important after all, or so you tried to bargain for an excuse to stretch your legs.

Attempting your best to glide through the old wooden boards without as much as a squeak, you headed towards the kitchen, passing through several other bedrooms in the process, probably all deep in dream land already.

Everything was too quiet, the sound of water filling the glass was the only thing interrupting the silence, its cool feeling going down your dry throat helped you a bit.

Drinking down what you can, you decided to take the rest with you back, a good excuse for a trip to the bathroom later. Although as you turned, a figure was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed and staring at you.

"Isn't it too early for breakfast?" Porco said, covering his mouth with his hand as he yawned, "you should get some rest while you can, we're getting thrown in the front trenches tomorrow." 

Just the mention of it made your stomach roll at the thought of staying in a muddy hole for days, the smell of gunpowder and yelling of soldiers, not to mention the crowded train rides back home.

"I know, it's just…" you stared at the water moving inside your glass while tilting it, "one of those days, you know?" 

eyes narrowing with his eyebrows pulling down in concentration, even Porco's sleep clouded mind could recognise the heavy bags under your eyes. The ride here used all of your energy and now you're too tired to even sleep.

Feeling an unpleasant weight on his chest, he wasn't sure what to say as he approached you, awkwardly leaning against the sink, a heavy sigh left him.

"You know, you should bother me more often, I don't mind it." His gentle tone was followed by a melancholic smile, "let's just...go to bed."

With that his hand wrapped around your wrist, loosely at first like he was reluctant about it, before it got more secure once you didn't pull away.

…

The old door gave out a creek as it closed behind you, the room dimmer than you left it with the candle you're carrying almost burning out. 

Looking at the small bed with a single pillow, you wondered how the two grown people would fit in it and judging by the frustrated look Porco was eyeing it with, he must be thinking the same.

Looking at him, your mind wondered back to all the battles you've fought together. For some reason the superiors always seemed more strick and harsh with him, especially after the paradise mission was launched.

Belitting and nagging, carelessly throwing him in risky situations.

Your grip tightened around the water glass, feeling growing thickness in your throat. "Hey...it's okay you can go to your room, you need sleep." You said moving past him to sit on the bed, "I'll be fine."

"Should've thought of that before waking me up, now scoot over." He said, rising an eyebrow and stepping closer.

"I didn't wake you up, you're just a light sleeper." Laying down, you stretched your limbs filling the bed, "there's no room, it won't fit."

Silence filled the room for a while, you could feel his eyes roaming over you, "Oh really? Well…"

One second, you were laying on the mattress while staring at his stubborn expression in confusion, the next a pair of arms was lifting you up as he stole your place before dropping you on him. His arm circled your waist not trusting that you won't pull away

"I made it fit." he looked at you with smugness in his eyes

His warm skin felt comforting against yours, contrasting with the cold room air, you could hear his slowing heartbeat with being so close to his chest, your legs slowly tangling to fit under the blanket covering you.

Apparently that's as far as his genius plan went, because after that an awkward silence filled the room.

"So...you made it fit huh?" You couldn't help but say, a grin slowly spreading on your face. 

Porco blinked in response, tilting his head, before his eyes stilled as his ears flushed. "Fucking god, you're such a-" his attempt to scold you was interrupted by a chuckle escaping mid-sentence.

Having a contagious laugh, soon enough you too joined him.

After it died down, the atmosphere was replaced by a much more relaxed one as his hold on you softened, more intimate than the previous one. 

"When I was a kid, i used to have trouble sleeping- well more like i was too stubborn to fall asleep." Porco said, trailing his finger up your back soothingly, "and since Marcel was stuck sharing a room with me, he'd tell me stories to get me to fall asleep."

"What kind of stories?" 

"...if you tell this to anyone I'm reporting you to the higher ups you for treason, they were flower stories." Clearing his throat, you could feel his heartbeat rising under you, 

Closely watching your reaction, Porco continued after some seconds. "now I'm not calling you a kid nor do i think it's as simple, i just think...we should give it a chance." 

With the heaviness of the blanket above you and warmth of his body underneath you, it was hard to refuse his request, especially with the way he looked at you so earnestly. 

You agreed, and felt his other hand reach to pull up the blanket more, tucking you protectively between his body and the soft fabric. 

"This first one is called...well i don't remember what names Marcel gave them, but it's about poppies."

Crimson red bringers of eternal sleep, their crumbled petals and dark centers often found in the ancient tombs of soldiers.

As the mother of nature, Demeter, mourned and grieved from the betrayal of Zeus, it wasn't only the mortal realm in which death loomed at every corner, for her own mind was a tormenting prison of never ending suffering.

And so a droplet of her blood sprang and flourished to create a six petaled flower, easing her heartache if only for a moment as the poppy put her to sleep, numbing the pain.

Following in her trail was a red carpet of poppies, soon enough death and sleep themselves wore the flower, red crowns resting on top of Thanatos's held up head and one almost slipping from Hypnosi's leaning one as he dozed off. for eternal sleep was only another name for visiting the underworld. 

A symbol of peace in resting and condolence for the loss of a loved one, became the poppy's role. 

"This is why you'd often see them in people's front pockets whenever we return home." Porco said, the light slowly vanishing from the room as the candle burned itself out, the flame snuffed.

You've never questioned why a delivery of poppies would always be on the requirements in each returning celebration, it's just always been there. 

Slow and easy breathes flew through you, lazily stretching your arms up till it met something soft. Porco seemed to tense as your fingers loosely combed through his hair, leaning into the touch after a while.

"Don't stop." He murmured, sleep clear in his voice as another yawn left him.

"Do you have any other stories?" Drowsiness sweeping through your mind, you buried your hed deeper against his neck, eyelids fluttering shut.

"Yeah just…" his hand stilled from behind you as he looked into space attempting to recall a memory, soon enough the soft stroking returned. "This one is about peony."

Named after none other than Paeon himself, these flowers lived up to their reputation of healing and honour, for they have their own story to tell.

How the peony came to be declared king of flowers.

During the Tang dynasty, empress Wu Zetian strolled through her garden. Frowning at the empty field of green covered in thick white blankets of snow, the harsh season not showing mercy for the plants.

With a new goal in mind to flip this dreadful looking graveyard of a garden, she set to defy nature for she is the ruler of the land and her word is law.

Per her majesty's order, all flowers shall bloom in the midst of winter's visit.

As the word travelled far, all the fairies in the land couldn't believe their ears, how could such delicate fragile petals grow amidst the storm and snow. For flowers only bloom in spring, how could we go against mother nature?

While merciless mother nature was cruel, she couldn't compare for the empress's strong rule. For the fairies feared for their wings as their knees shook in her presence.

When the sun shined again, it welcomed colourful fields of different flowers in full bloom. The empress was pleased with their sweet smell and proud colours, each one rivaling the other.

And yet, she stood still near one flower bed, eyes wide. The peony deified her words and stubbornly refused to open, only sticks and brittle leaves left in their place.

In a fit of rage, the empress banished the flower to a far away city, striping away their status.

Living up to their stubborn nature, the peony bloomed that spring the most beautiful flowers humans have ever seen, turning the city of Luoyang into a heavenly soft land as their petals danced through the wind.

But their beauty couldn't last long, for a hungry fire swallowed them all, under the order of the empress who turned their green to coal.

And yet to everyone's surprise, when the earth circled the sun again, the peonies were back in bloom. Springing from the ashes were their mesmerising big petals and soft colours. 

In their respect, the fairies crowned them for their bravery as the ruler of the flowers, for wasn't it for their sacrifice the flowers wouldn't have been freed.

"They stayed on the right way, even if it meant going against the world." Porco's slurred words were half muffled against the pillow, head buried in it, his eyelids seemed to get too heavy for him to force them open again.

Turning his head to the side, you felt his lips press a light kiss against your forehead before whispering a goodnight, his hold still comfortably secure around you as if you might slip away. 

Soon enough, you too drifted into sleep as only his soft snoring filled the room. The moon watching over both of you through the windows as her light barely reached inside. 

And at this instant, you didn't think there was anywhere else in the world you'd rather be. Thoughts of what the future holds were pushed to the back of your mind next to the past, for the present is now and what a waste it would be not to bask in these rare moments of peace in this horrible world

[caesthetix]

A LITTLE FEAR — Pt. 1 The First Hello

↪Jean Kirstein mini-series

↪content; canon universe, description of violence, season 4 spoiler, forbidden love, marleyan!reader, scouts!jean

"I would love to know a world without fear."

The night was quiet as the moonlight became the only thing that lit up the space you were in. No sound could be heard, save for the subtle heartbeat that penetrated your hearing.

It was so chilly today, notifying you that it was almost time for winter. You never really loved the weather to say the least, because most of the time the room temperature could drop so much even when you had a heater turned on in every crook of your house.

You hated how your fingertips could feel so numb that you wondered if they were still there. You hated how you needed to cover your body, layer after layer just to keep you warm. You hated how you had to drink the hot chocolate that you made within two minutes or else it would go cold already.

But maybe this year, you had something that you loved from it.

A small hum coming from his lips, with how your head was laying on his chest, you could feel how the sound reverberated through it. His arms draped loosely around your body, securing you there in his embrace as his finger caressed your skin.

This was the warmth that you had longed for, a physical contact which you always seek. The one that could make you feel like everything would be alright, one that made you feel — safe.

"What do you mean by that, hm?" He asked nonchalantly, but you knew him enough to hear the serious tone from his composed gruff. His usually smooth and silvery voice now sounded a lot breathy, perhaps caused by how the clock was ticking right at one am.

You didn't look up at him as your eyes fixated on the moon outside the window. Though your mind was now wandering around, mulling if you wanted to have a deep talk tonight. Yes, you had talked a lot about humanity with him before, something that always made his orbs shone a little brighter.

But what you were going to talk about tonight was something more than just a dream or how the both of you saw the world you were living in. There was something more that you needed to know from him. Because somehow you had a gut feeling that something big would happen and alter your relationship with him.

Well, would alter whatever bond it was that you shared with this man called Jean Kirstein.

You shrugged softly before wrapping your arms a little tighter around his torso, snuggling your head at the crook of his neck before you speak up.

"You know, a world without war, a world without discrimination, without a judge from the outside," You trailed off, licking your lips as you continued, still not facing the man you spent the last few weeks with. "Without having to lie and hide who you really are."

There, that was the response that answered your curiosity. It was just a millisecond but you could feel how his body jolted a little. There was nothing in between you and him, you could hear his breath hitched, you could feel how the arms around you twitched.

And without him needing to say anything else, you knew it was there.

"How," He gulped down, and once again, you could feel it. It seemed like he was pondering if it was the right thing to ask, if your words were just a random opinion instead of a statement. But he knew you too, and he knew how smart you were. "How long have you known?"

You didn't move away, and perhaps that fact was enough to make him calm down a little. Your head was still positioned on top of his chest as if you hadn't just cornered him with your words.

"The second night." You even said it so easily. He whispered a low what? under his breath, but you could hear it with how you were literally skin to skin with him. "Don't worry, you are smart to cover all your tracks." Your fingertips trailing on his chest, tracing the marks that now looked like a permanent part of him. "But you could never hide this."

He chuckled a little at this, realising the slip in his cover. You didn't know what was on his mind, perhaps he blamed himself for exposing himself to you, or he wished he didn't fall for your charm. Neither way made you feel any better though.

"So my mistake is sleeping with you.” The way he said it was ambiguous. You knew that he just mumbled that to himself, yet you couldn’t understand if it was a question or realisation. And somehow with that choice of words, you could feel a pang in your heart as you were reminded by the truth.

You and him, it was all just a mistake.

A mistake that both parties knew. A mistake that you both understood yet turned a blind eye over it. There was nothing that could justify the rendezvous that you had with him. He was an Eldian, a man that could turn into a monster if given the titan spinal fluid, even worse, a Paradis citizen.

Then there was you, a pure marleyan, one of the people who wanted nothing but extinction to the island of Paradis. But you had another worst side, and that was the fact that you were the youngest commander of the airborne unit, one that belonged to the Marleyan Military air force. 

You were someone who had full control over dozens of airships and hundreds of troops. You were someone who sent people to the front line, bringing them to their death for your greedy country to get more and more, always unsatisfied and wanting another land to conquer.

You were even worse than him who just wanted the freedom that your country took away by force.

But you couldn’t help yourself as he slid into the barstool beside you that day. With his gentle smile, trimmed facial hair, and those magnetic brown orbs that glinted brighter under the dimmed light. You remembered how you let out a small gasp by just taking a proper look at him.

Lots of men and women threw themselves at you but never once you batted your eyes on them. But goddamn Jean Kirstein and his alluring complexion, making you stumble over your own words when he asked you a simple question — your name.

It needed you a minute to finally relax under his piercing gaze, and it only needed an hour for you until you let him take you away from the prying eyes of Marley. You gave in into his touch, calloused hands that rivalled yours. His breath reeked of alcohol and yet you let those plump lips steal the air out of your lungs.

You thought it would only happen once in your lifetime. That rendezvous was shared between two drunk human beings who got attracted to each other. Yet the two of you somehow stood in front of the same motel the next day.

And the day after.

And the day after that until you moved it to your apartment.

And for you, what you had with him was anything but a mistake.

You swallowed a huge lump, gaze hardening as you stared into nothing. He hadn’t said a single word ever since then, and you wondered if he was as disconcerted as you inside. But despite the truth that had been spoken, the two of you still huddled under the warmth of your cashmere blanket.

“I didn’t see it as a mistake, Jean.” You finally confessed, and you never been this scared in your life. You had been through a lot, watching Marleyan titans devour the enemy, scattered brains on the battlefield, and yet you were never once afraid you would be like them someday.

But this, this confession, this fucked up truth about your feelings and what he would do to it was a lot more terrifying than dying in war.

“I see.” You still held your breath even though you already got your answer. It was still grey, you didn’t know what he was thinking right now, not yet. “I, too, don’t have any regret over us.” And that, that answer was enough to paint it white.

You subconsciously snuggle closer, tightening your embrace as you didn’t want to let him go. There was a dream, deep inside your heart that someday everything would end with the whole world united to walk forward together. Without the need for destruction, without the need to shed another blood on their lands.

And just once, just when you were with him was the time you could feel that dream. You could succumb yourself into another world when you laid in his arms, thinking that the two of you were just a normal citizen who would do mundane work when the sun was up, and cuddled up together for every night that came.

But you knew, since the time you traced the marks on his skin when you were sober, when you recalled what your warrior friend told you about his time in Paradis and the gear that made him have permanent marks all over his body, you knew that what you had with him was just a small nirvana that your own mind created.

It wouldn’t last, you knew damn well it could never last. And even though he didn’t say anything, as someone who supposed to be the only one who knew about the truth, he decided to keep on going and entangled himself with you. 

For weeks, for weeks he had been here in Marley, doing whatever he needed to do behind your back. You both acted as if you did not belong to the different sides at war, talking and enjoying each other's company and sharing a glass of wine before he went back to his place when the sun was still hiding behind the horizon.

“I have a question.” He cleared his throat, deep in thought as his eyebrows scrunched from either confusion or disbelief. “Why did you tell me about Marley’s plan? Why did you share the war plan with me? Me, your enemy.”

You pondered, why indeed? At some nights he would ask you some questions. But there was nothing too explicit on it as you recall. He would just ask you about your day, about how tiresome your work was, or ask about your condition when you looked so stressed some of the days.

It was just a simple question, yet you always answered some of them with a long answer as you slipped in some information about war here and there. You didn’t do it subconsciously, of course, you were always being sus and never shared work-related topics with anyone outside of the military.

“Because I want you to live.” But he was an exception and perhaps he knew that already. “Even if it’s not significant, I want you to have more chances to be alive.”

You cursed the universe for giving you a chance to love like this. To care for a man that could be killed by your country, or even worse, die by your hand. Was there anyone like you too? A Marleyan who fell in love with Eldian, not just Eldian in Marley even, but the devils themselves.

Being a part of the Marleyan Military means that you knew the truth. You knew how many mindless titans that your country sent to Paradis, and the fact that a few years ago the colossal and armoured titan was successful to breach the wall, that would mean a lot of the citizens of the island lost their lives and home.

And you didn’t dare to ask him about how many family and friends that he had lost.

“You do know that you could be executed for sharing a war plan, right?” He asked with worry lingering in his voice, yet he sounded a little exasperated, couldn’t believe that you would jeopardize either your occupation or your life for him. “You are so reckless, I swear to God.” But at the same time, he was thankful too, because it really showed him how much you care.

“Hmhm, I don’t care.” You just shrugged it off, deep in thought as you thought that the execution was worth it. “I should have died in one of the wars that I went to, yet here I am. Embracing the fact that I might be in love with an Eldian devil.”

He squeezed your body tighter for a while there, just after you said those words. Life was short, you understood that well for becoming a commander at such a young age and had been through a lot of hell. But unlike a lot of people who decided to keep their heart at bay or threw it away, you chose to keep it.

Just because you were going to die soon, didn’t mean that you shouldn’t enjoy what life had given you.

You cared and loved your friends because you knew someday you wouldn’t see them again. You had a routine where you just sat on the porch and greeted your neighbours because tomorrow you might not be coming back. You made sure to send your family a letter here and there because who knows it would be the last.

And now, you felt a strong emotion for this man that you never had before with anyone else. It was not platonic, you actually wanted to attach yourself to him without force. It was what they called romantic love, and at this point, you didn’t care anymore that having this feeling could lead you to death.

“Are you going to attend Tybur's speech tomorrow?” This question piqued your interest. You wanted to hope that perhaps he would like you to enjoy the festival with him before that. But something tugged at your heart, telling you to be careful. And this was the first time you ever felt the need to be cautious around him.

“Sadly, no.” Yet you remain as calm as possible. “I want to attend it, but duty’s calling in another post.” Now you pondered about it, every other squadron would be there, including the general himself. Yet somehow not you. “I had to check on the newly arrived airships, sucks how it’s on the same day as the speech.”

You were rambling on and on about it, ignoring the sigh of relief that slipped from Jean’s lips when he knew you were not going to be there. Deep inside your heart, you wanted to ask why did he throw the question at you, having a feeling there would be something going on.

But what you didn’t know wouldn’t hurt you, so you decided to keep your mouth shut.

Jean could only look at you with a frown plastered on his face. He knew that something was going to happen tomorrow. If what Eren wrote in all his letters were right, then he didn't want you to be there. He couldn't bear to see your corpse.

No, it was not that. Watching you die was something that would happen either tomorrow or some days later. But what he couldn't bear to see was your face when you knew he was one of the people behind the attack tomorrow, he was one of those people who fought with Eren Yeager, the enemy of your nation.

He could picture your face with disappointment lingering on your face. Because he knew with the plan that they had tomorrow, he wouldn't just kill the military but also the innocent citizens who had been oppressed all their lives in Liberio.

Right now he wanted to tell you that, he wanted to open up to you about the plan. But you were a commander, and if you shared the information to any of the higher-ups, that meant the attack tomorrow had a high possibility to fail.

Yes, he couldn't jeopardise that. As much as he wanted to keep you safe by telling you the reason why you shouldn't be there, he decided to keep his mouth shut. After all, what he didn't say wouldn't hurt you, right?

"Hey, love?" Jean called out, using the nickname that no matter how many times he had called you by it, always send a shiver down your spine. You let out a small hum to tell that you were listening, fingers trailing softly on his arms. "I need to go now."

"What?" You immediately looked at him, propping your body with an elbow as you searched for his smirk that was usually there when he teased you. But you found none. "Why? I mean, you always stay until around four, what change?"

He sat up in bed, both eyes casting down his lap as he tried to avert your gaze. Your lips jutted a little, trying to understand why. But then again, maybe his lips were sealed. Perhaps he had to attend a late-night meeting, or his leader started to get suspicious over the two of you.

"My comrades needed me." But that subtle answer was the only thing that he gave before he planted a kiss on your forehead. "Just sleep, I still have the key that you gave me. I will give it back to you next time." You frowned at that as he didn't give you any other explanation.

You sat there in your bed, eyes never leaving the tall figure as he snatched his clothes from the ground, wearing them one by one as he turned his back on you. 

Never once you felt like this, scared, over the unknown of tomorrow. You had tried to embrace the fact that you would never know what happened next. But with him, as you put a piece of your heart inside his soul, you started to get worried more often. And somewhere along the way, a little seed of fear started to plant deep inside your heart.

"Jean," You called out as he dusted his clothes, not wanting to see any wrinkles on them. "Why do I feel like I am not going to see you again?"

He stopped. His fingers that were currently buttoning up his suit halted as he listened to your question. You waited for him to say something and moved your body so you sat at the edge of the bed instead, wondering if he knew that something big would happen or not.

"Hey, it's not, okay?" Jean cleared his throat and turned to you. A gentle look was there as he walked toward you and kneeled to level his gaze with yours. "We will meet again, we have to meet again." You didn't know if it was him trying to reassure you, or he was reassuring himself. "I promise." But either of them, you would take it.

So you closed your eyes, erasing all of those fears and anxiety that crept in your mind. His lips captured yours, not in a passionate and rough movement like it used to, but instead, it was soft and felt so delicate.

And you wished you could have stayed like this forever, in his arms as you knew that with him you felt safe. That everything just became complete ever since Jean Kirstein came into your life as if he was some kind of guardian angel despite the nickname that was given to his race.

Yes, you could have stayed like this forever indeed. Safe, and perhaps loved.

But then you saw it as you were called back to Liberio sooner than you expected to. You saw it, all the collapsed buildings and how the rubbles trampled the innocent citizen. Everything was red, the scent of rust metal suffocated you as it was the only thing that you could smell.

No one told you about what happened here. The general was dead, all the higher-ups from Marley Military were wiped clean. There were so many countries joining this grand speech, and as you strolled around to see if there were any survivors, your mind started to speculate about who would have done something like this.

Then you heard a cough, someone, someone was alive. You point your flashlight to the source, finding an Eldian Unit leaning his body to the big rubble. He was gravely wounded with a huge gash trailing from his shoulder and down to his abdomen, and somehow you wished it killed him, so he didn’t have to suffer.

Having been through so much war, you already get used to seeing such cruelty. Wounded by a bullet and died in the spot, getting bombed as the body scattered around the ground, you had seen so much that nothing impacted you anymore.

But this wound — you snapped back to real life, not letting any horrendous thought filling your mind. You immediately checked for his pulse, it was weak but it was still there. 

“You need to keep your eyes open, soldier.” As a figure with authority, you couldn’t waver. “I am going to get you to the paramedic. Just stay still as I lift you up, and keep your eyes open.” You didn’t wait for him to answer you as you gently slipped your arms to pick him up.

“They were flying, commander.” He whispered, one hand gripping tight on your arm as if to stop you. “They looked so free up there, some with blades, and some with guns in their hands.” But you ignored it and stood up, securing his body in your arms as you started to run.

“Keep your eyes open and save your energy. Just live for the next few seconds.” You commanded, and he was just staring at the sky, somehow accepting his death already. “We are close, and you can be—”

“Commander,” He whispered out. “Have I become a good warrior? Have I redeemed my filthy blood to Marley? If I go now can I be free?” The questions rang in your ear, and you ran even faster since you knew he could be saved.

But what if he didn’t want to be saved from the start?

“Yes.” You answered without looking down at him. “You have become a good soldier in the army, you proved yourself that you have been so strong.” There was a little smile on his face as you said that, and you decided to slow down your pace. “And you will be free, you can do anything you want if you decide to go.” Because deep down, you knew he wanted it.

Your legs went limp as you realised he was gone. With a smile on his face and eyes opened as it looked up. Either to you or toward the sky, you didn’t know that. But you fell forward after that, with his body still secured in your arms. You didn’t cry, you lost so much and you thought tears were already dried.

You scrutinized him one more time, a solemn smile tugged at your lips as you slowly closed his eyes, wanting him to rest in peace. Your finger slowly traced the gash on his body, making your lips shaped into a thin line as your thought from last night was answered.

No matter how calm his eyes were before you closed it, it bore into your soul as it mocks you with a reminder.

“Are you going to attend Tybur's speech tomorrow?”

That the one who made you feel safe last night — was the same who would be responsible for the nightmare which happened today.

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[msmarvelwrites]

Vienna Waits

Summary: The reader has a hard time around the holidays because it brings up a lot of unhappy memories. Bucky knows trauma all too well and he’s always there to lend some Christmas cheer. 

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Warnings: mentions/flashbacks of assult, ptsd, 18+, swearing, but truly a fluff piece...

Word Count: 2.5k

Authors Note: Hi again! It’s ya girl, back at it again with the plot all to based on her own predicaments. Please read the warnings because the last thing I’d ever want to do is trigger anyone- but at it’s core I wrote this as an aid. Like My Girl, this was written to bring us together, because we are so much stronger that way! This is also my first submission to the Merry Hoemas Challange, so with that please enjoy! Sending love and light to all you beautiful holiday babies.

Thank you to @amythedvdhoarder  @chrissquares @drabblewithfrannybarnes @pumpkin-and-pine and @starlightcrystalline for hosting this holiday challange!

It was, of course, the most wonderful time of year. Christmas Eve at the Avengers Compound. 

The snow cascading from the dark sky acted as a sheet of white as you nervously sipped on your tea, checking the time once again. Your best friend was supposed to be back from his solo mission hours ago, and yet here you were, alone and completely overwhelmed. 

He was always better at these things. Always knowing how to avoid the holiday slump with ease. Bucky was who you turned to when you needed a quick coping mechanism. 

Christmas with the world's mightiest heroes had its perks for sure, but this was certainly not one of them. The joyous holiday music echoing through the Avenger hq living room was doing nothing to settle your nerves. In fact, quite the opposite. It lingered around you, pulling memories you buried deep down in the back of your mind. 

“I really think it’s better if I just head home… It’s getting really bad out there and…”

His lips cut you off, lazily trailing down your neck as the taste of bile rose into your throat. He was just drunk, you thought. So were you. You had given him the wrong idea. If you just explained you didn't want him to touch you… 

He would understand, you thought… You really did. 

“Honey, I’m home” Bucky called, cackling to himself as he shook off the snow caked to his winter coat. His voice shot you back into the dimly lit living room you now resided. 

You lunged from the recliner, spinning around the corner to find Bucky, hands full of gift bags and a candy cane dangling out of his mouth as a goofy grin tugged at the corner of his lips. 

“Where the hell have you been?” You tried to sound angry, but he was just so damn cute.

“Okay, first of all, you're welcome.” He scoffed sarcastically, gesturing to the gift bags as he placed them on the floor. “And second, you're the one who sent me out in the middle of a snowstorm for last minute christmas presents… So, you get what you get.” He chuckled. 

“No, no, I appreciate you- it… I appreciate it so much Buck.” You stumbled, though you didn't let the blush creep onto your cheeks before you spoke again, “You know how I get this time of year.” You sighed, crossing the room to help him with his bags of gifts. It wasn't lost on Bucky that the holiday season was difficult for a lot of the team, including yourself. Though he didn’t know everything about your past and how it brought you here, to the team, and one of the most ruthless fighters the Avengers had ever seen, he did know it was rough and dark and definitely off limits to talk about. Bucky didn't mind, however. As long as he had you by his side. 

“Ya know, if you help me wrap these gifts there might be a Christmas movie marathon in your future.” He wiggled his brows causing you to laugh. 

“That really sounds like a lose-lose on my end here, Buck.” you giggled.

“Are you by any chance at all into hot chocolate?” he bribed, though you would have caved regardless. Any time spent with Bucky was all you wanted for Christmas. 

Once all the presents were wrapped, Bucky was true to his word, puttering into the kitchen, whipping up his famous hot chocolate recipe. Honestly, if the world knew the famous Winter Soldier was as jolly was he is, they probably wouldn't believe it. Something about Christmas just brought out the best in him. 

“So,” You started as you sipped on your whip cream topped hot chocolate. “What is it about this holiday?” You pried, looking up at Bucky as he wiped a dollop of cream off the tip of your nose. 

“I don’t really know. Getting my memories back after all that time, Christmas with my Ma and sisters was always so clear…” He paused, his eyes fixing themselves on the floor. “I guess it’s one of the only really decent memories I have.” 

You only stared at Bucky for a moment as you let the words sink in. He never really spoke about his family and what, if anything he remembered. You never pushed him, thankful that he respected you the same. Though you had only been friends for a year now, those things just aren't privy to your relationship. 

“You never told me that before.” You finally spoke, watching as his eyes met with yours. 

“Yeah well, it’s hard to talk about sometimes. But… I don't know. I trust you, doll. More than anyone, I think. You kind of pull it outta’ me.” He sighed into that goofy smile you loved so much. You wanted to tell him that there was no one in this world that you trusted more, that you could and would be an open book for him, if that's what he wanted… But you supposed it went without saying. Instead, you rested you head on his shoulder, sinking back into the couch as you watched whatever sappy Christmas movie Bucky had picked out for you to watch. 

It wasn't long before the compound started to buzz with disembodied voices and echoing footsteps. A team was getting back tonight, and soon the living room would be filled with your friends booming laughter. 

You let your mind wander, tiptoeing into the darkest parts of your unconscious as the movie faded further and further away…

Your body shook, hard. You heard yourself plead, begging him to stop. Could feel the tears wet and hot as they rolled down your cheeks pooling onto your chest as he wiped them away. Such an act of kindness in such a nauseating scene. Your whole body ached with how hard you were trembling. So weak. You knew it, and now he did too-

Wanda was the first to round the corner, plopping herself down on the couch between you and Bucky, almost sitting right on your lap. 

“Good evening!” She chimed, resting her head against your shoulder in a complete and utter disregard of yours and Bucky’s closeness. Wanda was always the best at diffusing tension you hadn't even realised was there. Though now, as she sat there, it was very apparent that's exactly what it was. However you were thankful for her halting your train of thought. 

“Hello, darling.” Bucky chuckled as you wrapped your arms around her.

Tony rounded the corner next, snickering when he saw the three of you bundled up on the couch together. “Well, isn't that sweet. The trauma triplets are back together.” 

“Dont hate us cause’ you ain’t us, Tony.” You sang, watching as he rolled his eyes and puttered off to his lab. 

“So, any plans for this evening?” Wanda asked, grabbing your mug of hot chocolate without a second thought and taking a sip. 

“This is kind of it. Most of the team is back home with their family.” You explained, looking behind Wanda's head to Bucky, “Do you have any plans with Stevie?” You asked.

“Nope.” He popped the P. “Just us tonight. Steve’s out on a solo mission until tomorrow morning.” 

“About that… Nat is actually setting me up tonight. A double date, I think? So, it's just you guys tonight.” Wanda spoke sheepishly. 

Bucky and you both gapped at her before you finally spoke, “Traitor.” You glared while she only chuckled, shoving you playfully.  

“You guys will get along just fine without me. Just don’t watch The Holiday until I’m back! You guys know that’s my favourite”

As the compound quieted down for the night, you and Bucky fell into your daily routine of  comfortable silence. It was just like every other day, or at least that's what you tried to tell yourself as the end credits of another holiday movie started rolling onto the screen. 

“So,” Bucky finally spoke, shifting in his seat to reach for something out of your eyeline. “It’s technically christmas now… And, I know we said no gifts, but I saw this and it was just so you. I had to pick it up.”

Your eyes landed on the small velvet box in his hands, your breath hitching in your throat for a moment as your brain forze. You could feel your body trembling as he held it out, waiting for a reaction, but all you could do was stare. 

“Such a good little thing.” He finally spoke. Your eyes were so glazed over you couldn't quite tell where his voice was emulating from. You could hear his belt, feel his hands on either side of your face as he whispered in your ear. “Happy Christmas, baby.” He chided, dropping the small velvet box in your hands as he left the room. 

You couldn't bear to touch it, whipping it across the room as it shattered open, the small diamond necklace rolling across the hardwood floor as it tumbled to the ground with a harsh crack. Your fingers burned where the rough velvet had been, and you remembered thinking you'd feel this way forever. 

“Y/n?” Bucky spoke your name and it shocked you back to reality. You blinked at him, tears welling in your eyes as you stared at him. He looked absolutely terrified and it broke your heart. Absolutely tore you apart that you could ever be the reason for that face. 

“Hm? Oh, yes. I’m so sorry, I was so far away there for a moment.” You reached out but before you could take the small box, his hands covered your own and he let his thumb stroke your skin, sending a shiver up your arms and all around your neck. 

“You know I would never judge you, right?” He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. “God knows you've never judged me. I’m here. Whatever it is, it’s not your fault.” 

The words hit you like a ton of bricks. ‘Not your fault.’ Did he know? There was no possible way. You had Fury burn your physiatric evaluation from when you first started a year ago. No one knew. This was a fresh start, and there way no way that- 

“I can see your mind turning, and I just want to assure you, we are good. Okay? You and me, that's easy. It’s always been that way. Whenever you're ready, if you ever want to talk… I’m here, alright? Always.” His voice melted over you like a warm bath, calming you as you met his gaze. There was a sweetness you haven't seen before. It was new and yet there was something familiar about it. Had he always looked at you that way? Surely you would have remembered as it sent butterflies to explode in your stomach. 

He dropped the rectabled box in your hands and you finally felt the weight of it. Definitely heavier than a necklace, though you guess that wasn't really Bucky’s style anyways. 

You slowly clicked the box open, your eyes falling on the small black object resting on the pillow inside. 

“It’s a knife?” You spoke, just above a whisper as your hands traveled over the cool metal looking up at Bucky in surprise. 

Bucky chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck as he explained. “Remember that mission a year back? I think it was one of our firsts.” 

“Vienna.” You chimed, the memory coming back to you now. 

“You stole my knife.” He laughed, shaking his head at the memory. “I remember, I had it in my hand, you ran out of ammo and in a flash it was in your hands. Those Hydra punks didn't see you coming. God, doll. That had to be the hottest-” He blushed, clearing his throat, “I mean, that was the coolest thing I've ever seen. Been trying to find you one like it ever since.”

“Oh, Buck.” You signed, gripping the knife in your hands and effortlessly flipping it through your fingers as it sparkled in the dim lighting. 

“Do you like it?” He hummed. 

“Like it? I absolutely love it… I feel like such an ass for not getting you anything.” You confessed, averting your eyes to the floor. 

You flinched as Bucky’s cool metal fingers tipped your head up, and he tried not to notice, though the reaction wasn't lost on him. He really didn't know about your past, but trauma knew trauma. 

“Darling, this…” He motioned to you, “This is all I need for Christmas.” His voice was like honey in tea, warm and sweet and so smooth. 

“You flirt.” You giggled, shoving him playfully as you placed the knife back in its box and resting it on the coffee table.  

“I would never.” He sarcastically gasped, causing you to laugh at his dramatics. Bucky wasn't truly himself around the others, but you wished sometimes they could see his goofy side. Though it warmed your heart he reserved it for you. 

“What do you say? One more movie before we call it a night?” You asked, relaxing into his shoulder as you clicked through the options. Bucky’s silence caught your attention, pulling you back to his gaze. He stared at you as if startled by your words. 

“What?” You chuckled nervously, raising a brow when he didn't speak. 

“You're willinging requesting we watch a Christmas movie? Are you feeling okay?” He jested, lifting his flesh palm to your forehead as if to check your temperature. You swatted him away, rolling your eyes as you did so. 

“I’m fine. I just…” You watch him carefully as his laughter faded and he focused on you. “I never really thought I could enjoy Christmas. Someone stole that luxury away from me a very long time ago, but with you… With you it comes so easy. I know it must be hard, but you never let it show. I honestly can't tell you the last time I’ve properly laughed like that during the holidays. God, it's been years and yet here we are. You just pull it out of me.” 

Bucky smiled softly, holding his hands out for yours and you quickly accepted the gesture. His eyes crinkled at the corners as he grinned pulling you into his chest as he hugged you. It was something that was very new, and yet just felt right. Like this was how your bodies were meant to be, fit together like puzzle pieces. 

“Doll, I’ll pull it out for you whenever you want.” He cooed, sarcasm lacing his words and your head fell back, laughter bubbling out of your chest. 

“God, I love you.” You finally got out, but as soon as the words left your lips you knew how impulsive you had been. Bucky stilled beside you but you kept your eyes trained on the ceiling above, terrified to meet his gaze. It wasn't a big deal, just two friends admiring each other. You knew, however if you were honest it was much more than that. Bucky felt it too. 

“Darling,” He murmured, so low you almost didn’t hear him. Your eyes slowly returned to his as your heart nearly jumped from your chest. “You’ve had me wrapped around your finger since Vienna. You’re it for me. Always have been, I think.” 

You stared at him for a moment, unsure of where your voice went as your mouth ran dry. 

“As if I even need to say it, I love you too.” 

Divider made by the wonderful @chrissquares 

Thank you 3000 to my amazing friends @cutie1365 and @sweeterthanthis for their endless support and constant grammatical corrections. I’d be forever dyslexic without you guys... (I kind of will I think, but ya’ll make it a hell of a lot easier on me)

Taglist:

@sweeterthanthis​@cutie1365 @whateveriwant @drabblewithfrannybarnes @amythedvdhoarder @chrissquares @pumpkin-and-pine @starlightcrystalline @kalesrebellion @projectcampbell @calwitch @sycochick @sassy-pelican @mollygetssherlockcoffee​ @amateuratheart @officialmarvelbaby @a-really-bi-girl @fairislesheets

[chaeiimimi]

Chilly

Akaashi Keiji X Reader 

Genre: slight angst 

Tokyo has always been a busy city. A lot of people walking down the streets, some were talking on the phone, some were anxiously staring at their watches and some were just having a peaceful evening walk. 

It was the holiday season, so there’s no shock that the busy streets of the city was filled with couples more than usual. Two people in love with each other, being in each other’s arm as they stared at each other with love-struck eyes. Love seemed to fill the air of Tokyo and the giant tree in the middle of the city made it even better.

But then there you were, a single salary woman who can’t get into a relationship after her break-up three years ago

you stared at the window of the café you. were staying in, looking at a diversity of couples that walk by every few seconds

“geez even grade schoolers have dates” you mumble to yourself as you took a sip of your latte

It’s not like you haven’t tried dating, you’ve met up with a lot of people, every gender but you can’t seem to find someone who can satisfy you, even your friends had to get involved in your dating life, making profiles for you on online dating apps and even setting you up with people they know ranging from their friends to their colleagues and even their family members, but nothing clicked.

after trying for two years you eventually gave up “the right person will come at the right time” you told yourself over and over again

well seems like that person is taking their precious time

"wow talk about looking miserable*

Your head jolted up and saw non other than Bokuto Koutarou standing in front of you with about six different kinds of cake

You scoffed at him as he sat down in front of you

"I think Iwaizumi wouldn't be happy if he sees you eating that Kou" you pointed out to your athlete cousin

"don't worry I'll do extra workouts at home" he says as he begins to dive in the chocolate mousse cake

After being tied with him since like the day you were born, you are now convinced that Bokuto Koutarou will never grow up

"By the way, are you coming next friday?" he asked as he takes another bite of his cake

You tilted your head in confusion

"Akaashi's enggagement party" he looks at you eyes held a hint of worry

"yeah" you nodded

A comfortable silence engulfed the two of you as you stared at the couples passing by again

Do you ever think about me?

"Keiji, what do you want to do for christmas?" you asked your boyfriend who was immersed in his book

He quickly looks up to you his eyes soft

"whatever you want to do love" he said this with the most gentle voice

"but I want you to enjoy the holidays too" you whined and plopped down the couch beside him

"being with you is already enough for me" he says as he leans in to you and gave your shoulder a kiss before resting his head on your shoulders as he continues to read

You smiled ruffling his hair your heart beating a little faster and louder than usual because you knew you felt the same way

When she ain't around, is your bed cold without me?

"Keiji let go I need to make breakfast!" you try to pry your boyfriend's hands off your waist but he just held on to you tighter

"but its a weekend~" he whined

You sighed, he's always like this when he's sleepy especially in the mornings

"but we need to eat, we have plans remember?" you try to convince him

"but I want to cuddle more"

imnotgivinginimnotgivinginimnotgivingini you replayed this pharse for a hundred times in your head now

"how about you stay in bed while i make breakfast yeah?" you try again

Manz quickly shook his head "don't want, the bed's too cold without you"

Well that crumbled your resolve, you just went "screw it" and laid in your bed nuzzling your face on the crook of your boyfriend's neck

Yeah you ended up starting your day two hours late than your original plan

Does her love feels just the same?

"Keiji you need to rest! You're going to get sick!" this is the sixth time you tried to tell him that, you try to pry off the stylus pen on his hand but he just swatted you away

"I need to finish this" he says plainly and continues with his task

"no Keiji, you are not pulling a third all-nighter, I'm not gonna let you ruin your body"

"geez can't you just leave me alone?! you're always nagging and it's very annoying, unlike you, I care about my career"

His sudden outburst made you quiet, you knew that this project was important to Keiji, but he haven't had sleep in like three days, he barely eats and has already consumed a lot of coffee

You only wanted him to take care of his body is that too much to ask?

Your boyfriend's eyes suddenly widen at the realization of what he said

"I-" he couldn't form a form a proper sentence, it seems like fatigue was already hitting his system

You stepped closer to him and gently carass his face "I know love, we can talk about this later, but you need to sleep right now, please, I'll wake you up so that you can finish it on time okay?"

He looks at you, eyes tired, tears threatening to fall down but still had the softness that was only there for you

He nods and encircled his arms on your waist pulling you closer as he nuzzled his face on the crook of your neck

"c'mere big guy, lets get you to bed"

Is she the one to take your last name?

You were cooking dinner for you and your boyfriend who will arrive any moment now

You hummed to yourself as you stir the soup you were making

Too occupied to notice the arrival of your boyfriend, you only noticed when you felt strong arms encircling your waist

"Keiji don't scare me like that!" you scold him

He chuckled and kissed your cheeks "i'm sorry love, you just looked too perfect, I can't wait to marry you"

Whatever the case, I'm glad you're happy

"So this is it huh?" you stared at your now ex-boyfriend tears streaming down your face non-stop

"I'm sorry, things are just not the same anymore" he was also crying

How you ended up this way, nobody knows

"don't apologise, it was the best five years, i hope the best for you, I'll be packing my stuff now" you ended the conversation abruptly not trusting your voice, you immediately got up and entered your room making sure to lock it, only then were you able to let out the whimpers and hiccups you've been trying to hold in

You sighed, it happened three years ago, you were already over it

You stared at Akaashi who was now greeting some of his visitors with his fiance in his arms

His eyes landed on you and you gave him a soft smile, lifted your glasses and mouthed "congratulations"

He also smiled at you and nodded proceeding to talk to more of the guests

You looked down at your drink and let yourself sigh for the second time, your ex is getting married and here you are still single as a pringle

After catching up with some old friends and a little bit of drink you decided it was time to head home

As soon as you stepped out of the venue, the chilly air greeted you, you immediately shivered, you were wearing slacks and a thick long sleeve top and your house was like three blocks away so you didn't feel the need to bring a coat

"geez i forgot its December" you said to yourself as you rubbed your arm in attempt to keep you warm

This was stopped when you felt a coat drape over you

You looked up to see where it came from and a sight of a tall black-haired boy greeted you, judging by the way he dressed, it was clear that he was from the party as well, he also looked very familiar

"uhm-" you were about to take off the jacket when he said

"keep it on, you look like you need it" you decided to not take it off because he was right and he didn't look suspicious but you were still on guard

"thanks" you gave him a small smile

He just nodded but a hint of redness was evident at the tip of his ears, you assumed it was just because of the cold

"I'm Y/N by the way, L/N Y/N" you introduced yourself

"Kageyama, Kageyama Tobio"

[acciocriativity]

Yule Ball|| Harry Potter

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader // Harry Potter x Reader

Summary: It's been a year since you had a huge crush on Fred Weasley, but you never had the courage to confess it to the redhead. What will change when the Winter Ball takes place at Hogwarts? 

Word Count: 3.2k 

 The fifth year of Hogwarts couldn't be more confusing and crazy, the students from Beauxbatons and the Durmstrang students had just settled in the Great Hall, when the principal made the announcement that it was going to be the joy / despair of all the girls. That's right, with no middle ground. 

- Along with the Triwizard Tournament, the Yule Ball will also take place, just as it is in tradition - he said calmly as always, with a smile on his face. 

 Professor McGonagall explained the details but my mind was already far away, obviously my case is one of despair, not for lack of confidence but for opportunities. There was only one boy I would like to invite, but how would I do that if not more than one word we have already exchanged? I would not like to go with a stranger, a friend at the very least. 

I was already 5 years old at Hogwarts, why haven't I done anything yet? This is easy, two very simple reasons. We are from different houses, as a Ravenclaw I don't have many Gryffindor friends, unfortunately. It is very comfortable to form a social circle restricted to the home itself and I was a shy child, can anyone judge me ??  

I clearly remember the day I saw him the first time, it was the same day that I got my first Gryffindor friend. 

 I was hurrying up the stairs to the first floor, where the library is. It wouldn't be a surprise to anyone, but this time it was more urgent, it was two weeks before the 4th grade exam season and I didn't feel ready for the Arithmancy exam. 

I had barely stepped into the hall when I heard two excited voices talking, I didn't have to look more than once to find out who they were. The Weasley twins had quickly formed their own fame at Hogwarts, the only ones who didn't like them were the targets of their pranks, I still haven't had that bad luck, and probably their Slytherin opponents. 

It was the first time that I had a chance to see them without a circle of people around wanting to buy their limited products or their own friends around, and I didn't imagine what that little moment would do to me.

Although they were identical, one in particular had caught my attention. I didn't know what his name was and I didn't even have time to ask, as they walked to another corridor, opposite where I was. 

It was his warm smile and bright eyes, that enchanted me at that moment and even though neither was for me, I couldn't forget it and I tried. 

Later that day, I was trying to find a specific Arithmancy book when I noticed Angelina, a gryffindor and a year older than me. Difficult not to recognize since she is also popular, being on the Quidditch team but we never really spoke to each other, until that moment. 

- Are you in 5th year ?? I never saw you in any of the classes - I remember her saying looking at my hand, in which I was carrying an advanced potions book.

- Oh no, I like to advance some subjects when I finish studying - I replied calmly with a small smile as I took my book, right next to her head. 

- So are you good at potions? - she asked looking at me and I just nodded before she continued - and could you help me? It's a little difficult to pay attention to the class, when Fred and Jorge are there - she finished with a giggle, as if remembering something. 

From then on, we met at the library when they had no training and during those two weeks we got close enough, but not to the point of mixing our social circles and going out together. 

 I turned to face Angelina, even though she was away she met my gaze and smiled, she knew I felt something for Fred Weasley but I never said how deep those feelings were or she would have managed to help me a long time ago. 

I noticed that she made one of the signs that we invented to communicate when we were far from each other, that one meant that we were going to talk later in my dorm and I just nodded before I started eating. Too bad I didn't notice the attention of a certain redhead, because of my silent conversation with the girl.

 In the months that followed, because Harry's name came out in the Goblet of Fire and the first task was around, the atmosphere became extremely tense within the school and the animosity with the ball cooled. People commented on all sorts of nonsense and I did what I could when something like that happened in my presence, because it bothered me a lot. The whole school was against Harry, basically and I had made it clear that it was ridiculous, even though I didn't know the boy well. 

Because of that, I ended up getting away from some friends who disagreed with me and thought that Potter wanted to get attention again, but the good part is that I ended up spending a lot more time with Angelina in the Gryffindor Common Room, she always told me the password although the Fat Woman didn't like it that much. 

Today is Saturday and one of those days, I left my dormitory early because I had nothing to study and walked unhurriedly through the almost empty corridors. It seems like a rule, teenagers don't leave bed before 9 am. I saw the girl alone in the middle of the Gryffindor table so I walked right over there, sitting next to her. 

- Good morning Angie - I greeted with an excited smile while taking a look at the already full of food table  

- You dreamed of the 10 N.O.M.S. today, didn’t you? - she smiled at me before completing - or was it with a certain someone? 

I felt my face heat up as she laughed at me, the mornings when we are in a good mood usually start with these morning teasing and then we move on to the same topic…

- When are you going to invite Fred to the Ball? You know that when it comes to perceiving feelings, he is slow - she insisted just like every day that I should do something.

- He must have been invited already, It’s almost a month away- I gave her my most common answer, there are some days that I say I would invite him, but that never happened. 

- He is still available but at some point he will be not! Do you really want to see him dancing with another girl? - She looked at me defiantly even knowing the answer.

- If I promise that this time I will ask him to come with me, will you let me eat in peace ?? - I asked, holding her gaze and received a satisfied smile in return. 

 Sometimes I didn't even understand the reason for all this nonsense, at times I just wanted to be able to confess my feelings and if I was rejected, I would just move on. But then I got close to him and couldn't, at least that way I had hope. The gryffindor in me will have the courage today, thanks to Angelina and my stupid promise. 

Gradually the students arrived and among them were our friends. Alicia Spinnet, Dino Thomas, Olivio Wood and Lino Jordan. Soon the trio, Harry, Hermione and Ron came down and then Fred and Jorge with the usual good humor. 

- Good morning girls - they both winked at us at the same time with a smile from someone who’s up to no good.

- Good morning - we answered together but with different reactions, Alícia simply ignored it, I controlled myself not to blush and Angelina just smiled more.

 Fred sat two chairs to the left in front of me and Jorge beside him, there was no way I could talk to him during breakfast and I thanked him for it, but I regretted it soon after.  

- And haven't you became a man yet to ask someone to the Ball, Ron ?? - I heard Fred's super discreet voice, interrupting my conversation with Lino.

 Obviously everyone there turned to pay attention, the teasing between them was always fun, especially in the morning. 

- You didn’t ask anyone too, where's YOUR courage Fred? What are you afraid of ?? - I never had seen Ronald Weasley with such a satisfied smile on his face or an expression so outraged on the elder. 

- I'll show you the courage, look and learn Ronald - he had made a point of getting up and I held my breath when I saw him looking in my direction, it couldn't be ...

- Hey Johnson, do you want to go to the Yule Ball with me? - He asked without realizing my expectations and a piece of my heart breaking after that. 

 She replied an yes after looking at me quickly, I didn't mind her accepting it. They are friends and I already knew that she wanted to go with Jorge, the reason why she had not accepted any invitation until now. I had already thought about what it would be like if this situation happened, in my head it was much worse. 

The next few days followed with little change about Fred, at all times if I could avoid him, I would. Not out of anger or anything, I wanted to take my focus off him. I had declined 2 invitations because I hadn't imagined myself with another guy, and that was going to end. 

Alicia and I had just returned from London, we went to look at some new dress options, as many girls would go to the witch shops nearby. We barely stepped into the Great Hall when Hermione walked out furious and a little upset, she didn't even greet us as she always did.

- What did you do to make her so upset ?? - I asked facing Harry and then Ron, before sitting down next to Harry.

- I just said that she could come with one of us to the Ball - explained the redhead while devouring the food on his plate.

- Now? It’s a month away, I would have been angry too - they both looked at me without understanding and I had to take a deep breath - you don't understand anything about girls, do you?

- She felt like the last option, nobody would like to feel that way, obviously, you should have invited her long before - Ali replied without patience, while the realization seemed to hit their faces. 

 Ron seemed to reflect for 3 seconds before eating again as if nothing had happened, so there were only the three of us left to talk.  

- And your partner Harry? Mcgonagall is going to freak out if you have to open the Ball alone - I commented while getting me some soup. 

- I haven't found the right girl yet ... - he replied a little uncomfortable and looked to the side as if he had remembered something. 

- Not wanting to intrude, but already intruding, you two could go together. Just as friends - she completed as soon as she saw the boy look at us petrified but relaxed shortly thereafter.

- No problem for me, I was thinking about not going, but at least it could be fun - I spoke with a small smile and he nodded. 

 For the rest of the month, I ended up getting closer to him and consequently to the most unbearable couple that ever existed. I love Hermione and Ron, but how can two people be so stubborn? I don't know, it's a mystery but at the same time, it was good entertainment and I managed to disconnect from my feelings for Fred. 

It was getting close to the time to start the Ball and I had barely stopped to think that I would be forced to deal with Angelina and Fred dancing together, even though I had never been jealous of the two before, the scene didn't seem pleasant. 

I took one last look in the mirror analysing my dress, a long red velvet dress with sleeves and a slit up to my thigh that defined my body in the right measure. I was feeling incredibly beautiful the way I was and nothing could ruin my good mood, not even my unrequited crush. 

I agreed to meet my friends near the stairs and there they were, Hermione in a pink pretty dress talking to Vítor Krum further away, Ron was about to explode at any moment and Harry, as usual, seemed to be trying to find an excuse to get out of there and I preferred to help with that. . 

- Hi boys - I said quietly standing on the first step of the stairs and as they had their backs to me, they jumped and I couldn't help laughing.

- You can't come like this and scare others, I almost had a fit… - the redhead put his hand on his heart dramatically, it seems that the hatred has vanished too.

- Everyone will go down the stairs, you should be gossiping in a more discreet place. It's about Hermione again, right? - I asked shamelessly without caring about the complaints about my comment. 

- And why would I waste my time talking about a traitor? - his face went from white to red in a few seconds, it seems that the anger had returned.

- I only know one thing, we can't be late, right Harry ?? In fact, I need to talk to you quickly - I didn't even let him agree and I pulled his arm and walked to a spot nearby without anyone

- Did something happen? - he said while adjusting his glasses and I just denied it with a smile, making him even more confused. 

- I just wanted to give you a break from Hurricane Ronald Weasley but if you want to go back there, I don't mind - I said looking behind his shoulder and there it was, a clear image of the redhead fighting with an innocent student.

- In fact, a few minutes without having to listen to his rudeness is great, not that he's a bad friend, but sometimes it's a little ... too much - he replied with a small smile of thanks.  

 We talked for a few more minutes before Mcgonagall officially announced the start of the party, where we would have to dance first. We had rehearsed a few times, so we weren't ashamed, although I wanted to laugh at the memories that came to mind and I could see the same in Harry's eyes. 

After that moment, the other champions also danced with their partners and then the party really started. I preferred to avoid dancing more than necessary, because that would be shameful but it doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it. 

I was sitting at a table with Harry and Ron because apparently his partner was not very happy, but I decided not to go into that. Until I see Angie approach and place her hand on my bare shoulder.

- Can we talk for a moment?? - She said and by her expression, it seemed to be important. 

 I nodded and as the two continued talking to each other, I preferred not to interrupt and just went with the older girl to a corner with fewer people. 

- Did something happen? - I asked calmly and noticed that she looked towards the direction where Fred and Jorge were with another girl.

- Yes, I already knew it would be a complete mess, since you wanted to come with one person and I with another, but I think you can fix it in time - she said looking back at me.

- I don't know Angie, just with a Time-Turner and a little bit of luck, then I would be able to ask him to come with me. 

- It was wrong but I just overheard him saying something to Jorge, he said he wanted to invite you. I was noticing for a while, I was pretty sure he liked you and I just had the proof - she said with a small smile and then immediately took my hand and continued - I don't want to see you two suffering.

 I barely knew what to say so I preferred to demonstrate it in the best way I could, that is, with a hug even though it wasn't much of a hug most of the time. 

 

- Thank you for telling me but I think I'll be forced to steal your date now - I replied with a small smile and stepped back from her. 

- Someday I'll forgive you for that, but this conversation is for later - she winked at me and walked away to the other side of the party. 

 I took a deep breath and as soon as I looked back in the direction where the twins were talking, I realized that there was no one there anymore and I couldn't help being disappointed. 

- Looking for me, love?? - a voice well known to me spoke at a minimum distance from my back and I immediately turned around.

- Actually, yes, but you came here, so it must be important - I replied with a smile without being affected by his proximity, since it was not uncommon for him to try to frustrate me with this type of provocation.

- Since when is something I have to say unimportant ?? - he spoke in an indignant voice but his smile denounced him - let's go for a walk, what do you think? It’s too full here - he said and then held my hand, how could I refuse such a request? 

 I just nodded and then we left the Hall, walked, still holding hands, to the garden. I am sure that did not fail to pass through the attentive eyes of my friends, but it was not the time to think about that. 

- I know we've only really known each other this year - he started talking and then stopped walking - but I really started to like you a lot - his voice were softer and even a little uncertain. 

- Of course, we all became fast friends - I replied with a satisfied smile, maybe it was mean but I was loving this moment and I didn't want it to end so quickly.

 He looked away and took a deep breath before looking back into my eyes with a lighter expression.

- You're having fun, aren't you? It's pretty funny, isn't it? - He asked and I could see his eyes shine, the kind of glow that appears when he has just made a prank. 

- Yes I am. How could I not be when I left Fred Flirt Weasley frustrated? - I replied holding the desire to laugh, for the situation and the new nickname I invented. 

- I had a much more fun idea, love, you'll like it - he said confidently.

 Before I could ask what it was, one of his hands found my face and the other on my waist, pulling me closer. A second later we were giving our first kiss, the first of many to come.

Harry Potter Masterlist

[alj4890]

Delicate

(Ethan Ramsey x Olivia Nevarkis) (Olivia Nevarkis x Drake Walker) in a Choices The Royal Romance/Open Heart Crackship Series

A/N Picking up directly after Drake's visit and fallout. This will lead into the Christmas season, with Ethan inviting Olivia to spend the holidays with him and his father.

@jooous ​ ​ @krsnlove ​ @nomadics-stuff ​   @twinkleallnight ​ @motorcitymademadame ​

Masterlist

Part 5

Ethan knew something was wrong. Even without his highly attuned ability to detect the slightest tics and movements people made when dealing with pain, he still would have known that Olivia was upset.

What bothered him was that she felt the need to keep it hidden.

He thought they were well past the stage of not being completely honest. It had been one of the most difficult yet rewarding part of their ever developing relationship. It was terrifying and freeing to be able to tell her anything.

Ethan knew he needed her. He had made it a point to never allow himself to need anyone. He once believed that it was a weakness, something that any sane person should be able to do without. One should be able to stand and face whatever life threw at them without having someone there to help you through it.

Or so he thought until Naveen nearly died.

Then seeing Bryce's reaction when Casey was poisoned.

Those two situations had opened his eyes and made him come to some uncomfortable conclusions about himself.

He was human. And what did all humans share? The ability and need to love...to have someone all their own to be there during life's brightest and darkest moments.

As he finished prepping the turkey breast for tomorrow's dinner, his eyes drifted over to the one he believed was his someone.

He hoped that he had become Olivia's.

"How was your day?"

Olivia shrugged. "Fine for the most part."

Ethan washed his hands then reached for a bottle of wine. Setting two glasses out, he filled them while studying her.

Olivia muttered her thanks when he handed hers to her. She absentmindedly swirled her wine while a slight frown formed.

Ethan reached out and caressed her cheek. When her eyes met his, he allowed her to see his concern.

"Drake came to my apartment earlier." She blurted out.

"He did?" Ethan gestured for them to move into his living room. After settling comfortably on his sofa, he patiently waited for her to continue.

"Yes." She bit out. "He supposedly came on his way to his family's ranch to show me pictures of the progress on the hospital. Her frown eased at that memory. "I can't wait until you see it. It is turning out just like we hoped."

A hint of a smile formed on his lips over this shared dream of theirs coming about. "I can't wait either."

Hearing Ethan say that caused the gnawing worry to grow even more. Was it the beginning of the end for them? Drake's parting words kept repeating over and over her mind. Somehow they seemed more prophetic than insulting the longer she dwelled on them.

"You really think this Ramsey is what you need?" Drake taunted. "One day you'll leave here and he will see the real you in Cordonia. This Boston bubble you're living under is going to pop. What will he do when he sees you as a duchess, mingling amongst the court?"

"You think he'll adore you then? Just wait until he hears all the tales of your years of temper tantrums and cruelty."

"Liv?" Ethan pulled her into his arms. "What happened?"

She didn't want to tell him. She hated this fear Drake had caused in the one area she had come to love. The simple happiness she had found in Boston was now tainted with doubt. He had made her once again hate herself.

Was her act of redemption going to never end? Was she to pay for every word and action she had done for the rest of her life?

Does nothing I do matter?

She closed her eyes tight when Ethan brushed a tender kiss to her furrowed forehead.

I don't deserve someone like him.

His hand rubbed her back in soothing circles while he waited.

Olivia felt tears prick her eyes. He was the only person she had ever known to give her physical comfort. The way he held her as if she was precious to him without trying to turn it into something sexual made her want cry.

She couldn't lose this. Lose him.

But she also couldn't deceive him.

"Ethan," her voice trembled making her hate herself even more for needing him, "You know about my past with Drake."

She felt him tense yet he continued to try and soothe her.

"I do."

She looked up at him and saw his own face etched in worry.

"He...we got into an argument about that and..." It was too hard. She couldn't stand the thought of destroying the way Ethan looked at her. The way he cared for her...

"Olivia," he tried not to let his fear take over of losing her to her former lover, "are you trying to tell me that you..." He couldn't get the words out. He couldn't stand the thought of going back to how his life was before she became a central part of it.

His mind stuttered at that. Medicine had once been his central part. Everything in his adult life had revolved around it. And while it still was a big part of who he was, Olivia had somehow created a niche all her own in that center. Somewhat entwined in it, yet on a personal level, he found that every decision he had made from the moment they met were made about her. From choosing a restaurant she might like to moving to her country to work at her proposed hospital, she had become his life.

Had Drake unknowingly destroyed his life in one brief visit?

"That I what?" She asked.

His blue eyes held her green. "That you want to get back together with Drake?"

Her eyes widened. "Good Lord, no." Her nose wrinkled. "That is the last thing I want."

She felt his arms relax as they cuddled her closer. His forehead dropped against hers as he dealt with the heady relief that her admittance brought.

Realizing he had been scared she was ending things caused a need to reassure him. Her lips met his in a tender kiss. She could feel the deep longing he had for her in his response. He still held her gently as their kiss came to an end.

"What did he say?" Ethan asked.

"He was angry that I don't see the need to keep discussing why our barely a relationship had to end." She bit her lip. "Then he brought up you."

Ethan arched an eyebrow. He had not been around the man enough to form an unbiased opinion. He knew the flare of jealousy was from what he assumed was going to be an attack on his own character in the hopes of stealing Olivia from him.

"What about me?" He didn't bother to hide the annoyance tempering his tone.

"How you'll be when you see me in Cordonia." Olivia averted her eyes. "And how what we have here will be completely destroyed."

His eyes narrowed at such a choice of words. "Why would it be destroyed?"

"Ethan, you," she lowered her head into her hands for a moment. Taking a deep breath, she forced the words out. "You know some of my past already. You've witnessed my temper. But I...I used to be cruel. I've changed these last few years, and it has helped heal relationships I have with some members of the court." She looked up at him to see how he was reacting. "But Drake believes once you hear their stories and see me as the prideful duchess that you will not want to be with me."

"First off," Ethan snapped, "he doesn't know a damn thing about me or how I feel about you. From what I know of you, you deserve to walk into every ballroom with your head held high." He snorted in irritation. "They should be begging for your attention."

Olivia briefly smiled at that. Only he could turn one of her faults into a compliment.

"Secondly, I haven't been known to be the kindest doctor to work with."

"Your patients would disagree."

He huffed. "That's because I work to help them." He pulled her closer within his arms. "Jerk might be the nicest word interns and other medical staff have referred to me." Ethan pressed another kiss to the top of her head. "And my quick temper might give yours a run for its money ." He grinned when he heard her muffled laugh. "And I've never been known for being a forgiving man."

She wrapped her arms around him as she settled her head in the crook of his neck and shoulder. "If anyone tells you about me, then--"

"I know who you are, Olivia." Ethan stressed. "I will never hold your past up as a standard to measure your actions by."

Silent tears slipped down her cheeks.

"Thank you." She whispered.

"Don't thank me." He grumbled. "And don't believe what Drake said." He grimaced as a thought struck. "Though I can imagine why he acted like he did."

She swiped at her stray tears. "You can?"

He nodded before resting his cheek against her head. "Who knows how I would react if this was reversed? I might have lashed out at you in frustration if you refused to give me a second chance."

She lifted her head to see his face.

He met her gaze and softly smiled again. "Especially since I am in love with you."

"You--" her lips parted in surprise, "You are in love with me?

"I am."

Olivia knew in that moment what was truly in her heart. All the questions she had asked herself that morning finally had an answer. And all because Ethan had done the one thing that no man had ever done before.

He did not judge her for her past, her name, anything. He accepted her, faults and all, and loved her for every single part.

"I love you too." She smiled against his lips. "I have never loved anyone like I do you."

Their kiss held a new edge to the usual passion. Having expressed their feelings, the need to show just how much they loved one another took over.

While clothes were beginning to be hastily tossed around the living room, Olivia's phone vibrated softly in her purse.

***************

Hearing the beep, Drake cleared his throat. "I know I am probably the last person you want to talk to but I need to say I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of what I said. I wish..."

He took a deep breath. "I wish you would give me a second chance to show you that I do care the way you wanted me to. I know you're with Ramsey now, but I want to try what you asked me all those months ago. I want to be with you, out in the open."

He lifted his eyes to the ceiling of his hotel room in Kentucky. "I won't keep bothering you. I'll give you time to think it over and wait until the New Year's Eve Ball to hear your answer." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Hana said you told her you'd be back by then. I hope I didn't...didn't ruin what chance I could have."

Pausing once more, he dropped his head in his hand.

"Take care, Libby." He said softly before ending the call.

******************

That night, Oliva felt once more at peace. In the darkness of Ethan's bedroom, she smiled at how he was spooned around her. His slow deep breaths of sleep lulled her even more into the addictive security his presence gave her.

She kept replaying his words of love in her mind. In many ways it surprised her, and yet deep down she thought she must have already known. Every action, every kind word, every kiss had revealed that he had given her his heart. And she in turn had given him hers without even realizing it.

As hard as it was to find some type of silver lining to Drake's hurtful words, she supposed she should be grateful for them. Her sharing it had possibly prompted Ethan to tell her how he felt about her.

She yawned while snuggling back against her doctor. His arms pulled her even closer as he slept.

She felt both exhausted and wired. The day had been filled with one extreme emotion after another. And yet, the words both men had said kept her awake.

Olivia didn't know if she had it in her to forgive Drake. To have someone that you actually trust bring up the worst pieces of yourself as a threat to ruin the one good thing you have...how could he do that to her? She had been hurt when he didn't return her feelings, but this fight today had damaged them to the point that she wasn't sure if she even wanted him as a friend.

I would never say something like that to him if he managed to find happiness with someone else, she thought to herself.

Ethan had been much more understanding of Drake's actions than she could ever be.

She knew it wasn't necessarily a good thing that she never gave people second chances. Why would she after all the betrayals she had suffered in life? She barely needed both hands to count the number of people she had over the years that had never betrayed her.

Had Drake entered into the category she kept for her parents, Lucretia, Constantine, and numerous nobles at court?"

I don't know, she thought. I don't know how I feel over what he did.

She thought about his voicemail. It didn't matter how sincere Drake sounded or that he now wanted to try. His apology seemed hollow. Perhaps it was because he truly didn't know her now. These months in Boston had changed her, possibly even more than she realized.

She wasn't the same proud duchess that had once sworn vengeance to anyone who opposed her. She had learned the difficult art of give and take. She made herself listen and think through everything before losing her temper or forming a hard decision. It had been an ongoing battle, but she felt that she had a somewhat better control than she once had. Today's fight with Drake had proved that she wasn't the same quick tempered, plan to skewer a person on the edge of her dagger she had once been. She had stepped out of her comfort zone and lived for the most part as a normal person, proving to herself that she truly could survive on her own in any situation.

This venture had shown her that she was more than what her ancestors had stressed a Nevarkis should be. The people in Cordonia would most likely still see her as her old self, but she knew and it seemed that Ethan did also who she truly was. Her strength, her refusal to back down from a fight, her very heart had been used for good.

Drake didn't see it. He never saw the potential she had to do something meaningful and right. Maybe it was because she hadn't allowed him to do so. Maybe they really never had a chance to see the best in one another.

Could we have found a way to happiness if we had not spent years torturing each other with our spiteful words?

Deciding that that was a thought that would probably never be answered, she closed her eyes and eventually drifted off to sleep.

********************

Weeks went by too quickly for some and not nearly fast enough for others. Edenbrook had closed its doors leaving many with bittersweet emotions. Ethan, Naveen, and Olivia had spent what free time they had packing and shipping their personal belongings to Cordonia. Decisions were made for the two doctors to stay with her in Lythikos while they searched for homes of their own.

While rushing about, Amanda and Thomas came to help a week before Christmas.

On their second night together, the ladies sent Ethan and Thomas to get dinner, giving them a moment to talk alone.

"Did you come for me or for the snow?" Olivia teased when Amanda insisted the two of them take a break from packing and go for a walk.

"Since you have always had the best snow," Amanda replied with a twinkle of mischief, "I always come for you."

She laughed when Olivia snorted.

"Are you excited?" She prodded as their boots crunched in the snow.

"About finally seeing the new hospital?" Olivia linked her arm through Amanda's when they entered a nearby park. "Of course."

"I am too." Amanda took a deep breath and cut her eyes toward her friend. "And I am very excited to see you and a certain doctor together at the New Year Eve's ball."

Olivia didn't bother to mask how happy she was. "I have something to tell you."

"Oh?"

"Ethan, he...on Thanksgiving, he admitted he is in love with me."

"About time." Amanda grumbled playfully. "Each time I visit, I see just how much he does love you."

Olivia stopped their progress through a path of lighted trees. "You knew all this time? Why didn't you tell me?"

Amanda's laughter at the death glint in Olivia's eyes echoed across the park. "Because you would have dismissed it like you always have whenever I brought up heartfelt emotions."

She placed a hand on her hip and somehow did a convincing impression of Olivia. "Please. No man can truly capture a Nevarkis heart, much less make me willing to be his," Amanda managed to twist her lips in disgust like Olivia's as she flicked her hand in a very recognizable gesture, "love slave."

Olivia rolled her eyes while struggling with her laughter. "I don't sound like that."

"Not now that you're in looovvve." Amanda responded playfully.

"Why do I share things with you?" Olivia muttered.

"Because you love me." Amanda wrapped her arm around her. "Not as much as you love Ethan, but I can live with that."

Olivia snorted again as she tried to brush it off. As hard as she tried, a soft smile formed on her lips. "You're right."

"I am happy you both know how you feel about one another." Amanda's teasing turned serious. "It would have driven you crazy with trying to guess."

"I suppose it would have irritated me." Olivia admitted. 

“I know it would have driven me insane watching you both tiptoe around the issue.” Amanda grumbled.

“It surprised me.” Olivia admitted. 

“It did? Why?”

“I--I suppose I didn’t expect it to happen.” She felt embarrassed just saying it. “I don’t think I ever thought I would meet someone to feel like that... I never thought of any of it happening to me.”

Amanda's heart ached at realizing just how damaged Olivia still was over her parents. Nothing hurt her more than seeing her friend still believe that she was unworthy of love. To be this surprised over a man falling in love with her proved how much she doubted herself. Perhaps it was why Olivia continuously pushed herself to serve Cordonia in any way possible. It might be why she never backed away from danger.

Compliments and recognition had been the closest she had to receiving love in her life

Amanda felt herself adoring Ethan even more for showing Olivia that she herself was loveable. She wasn't the prickly cactus that she had given Liam at his coronation. She had a tender heart, one that any person would be lucky to earn.

"I love him." Olivia broke into Amanda's musings. "It's different from what I once felt for Liam."

Amanda squeezed her in a side hug. "One sided love usually is different. Having someone give their heart to you and work in the hopes of you giving them theirs, I can't think of a greater gift than that."

Olivia nodded. "Ethan does that. I thought that maybe after we admitted our feelings that he would slack off trying to," her brow furrowed at trying to find the words.

"Sweep you off your feet?"

"Yes." Olivia's nose wrinkled out of habit over something so sappy. "He now seems to work even harder to not only keep my love but to make me love him even more."

"Good." Amanda linked her arm through hers again. "He better or he will have me to deal with."

Olivia burst into laughter. "And what will you do if he doesn't?"

Amanda's smile grew. "Don't worry. I've been trained by the best on how to torture a man." She winked at her friend. "You always did give the most interesting lessons."

*****************

Christmas was approaching and with it, Ethan invited Olivia to drive to Providence to spend Christmas with him and his father.

She was both excited and extremely nervous to meet his one family member he had a relationship with.

She was completely out of her depth in this situation. She had never had a man invite her to, "meet the parents,". She knew though how big this was for Ethan to include her in his family's Christmas tradition.

He seemed so happy, so proud, to introduce her to his father.

The drive over had been filled with his sharing some of his childhood memories. Her hand had remained in his as she watched the play of emotions on his face. He was opening up to her again, showing how much he trusted her with these bits of himself.

The modest, in need of a new coat of paint home had surprised her. She didn't know why she expected Ethan to have had a childhood a tad more luxurious than this. He seemed so cultured at times, that it impressed her even more that he had learned all of it on his own.

Ethan's father, Alan, had come outside to welcome her while helping with their luggage.

The genuine delight in the elder's face at meeting the woman his son had brought home made her feel slightly giddy. He teased Ethan with saying he had not done nearly enough in describing how pretty she was.

"I did." Ethan teased back. "You just didn't pay attention."

The three shared a meal with Olivia watching in fascination at their closeness. So many of her friends either had parents dead or were not close to them at all. This was something entirely new.

Alan had charmed her into sharing a little about herself. His understanding smile and deep laugh had made her relax. After dinner he pulled her away from the table while ordering Ethan to do the dishes.

"You're taking her to the mantle aren't you?" Ethan grumbled while fighting a smile.

"Don't worry what we're doing." Alan reciprocated. "Just make sure to soak that pan before putting it in the dishwasher."

Olivia allowed herself to be ushered into the small den. A Christmas tree stood with slightly old ornaments next to a warm crackling fire. Her gaze lifted to the different sized picture frames on the mantle.

Picking up one that seemed to be the oldest, Alan handed it to her. "This was a few weeks after Ethan was born."

Olivia's lips curved at seeing what looked like any other baby. She studied each picture he handed her, giving her glimpses into Ethan's life. Her smile grew at a photo of a ten year old Ethan smiling while puppies crawled all over him.

She then noticed the woman in the background.

"That's his mom." Alan's joy seemed to dim some. "She had been the one to decide we go to a nearby farm to let Ethan choose a puppy for his birthday."

Olivia studied the image of the woman who had so easily left her husband and son.

How could she do that to him?

The sound of Ethan returning caused Alan to quickly switch the picture for another one.

"Here he is with his first car."

"Dad." Ethan grumbled good naturedly. "I'm sure Olivia doesn't want to go down through every mundane event in my life."

"I do." Olivia blurted out. Heat flooded her cheeks. "I like seeing your childhood."

Alan beamed at her. "Here's one of my favorites. He was around five years old and had opened a clinic for stuffed animals."

"Did he?" Olivia cocked an eyebrow at Ethan.

"I'll have you know that I save many from losing their limbs." Ethan smiled at her laughter. "I had to since most of the injuries my toys suffered were from my rigorous playing."

The three sat down and began to talk about Ethan moving to Cordonia.

"You will have to visit." Olivia insisted. "You will always be welcome in Lythikos."

"I plan to." Alan stood and stretched. "I think I'll leave you two to get some sleep." He patted Ethan's shoulder then squeezed Olivia's hand. "I'm so happy you're both here."

Ethan settled his arm again around Olivia once they were left alone in companionship silence.

"Your father is very kind."

He chuckled. "Yes, I know. Nothing like me."

She smirked at him. "Don't sell yourself short. You have your moments."

"I do, huh?"

"I think so." She snuggled closer within his arms.

Smiling to himself, Ethan reached into his pocket.

"Olivia?"

"Hmm?"

He held a box out to her.

She sat up with a start when her eyes fell upon the little velvet box.

"I think you know what I'm about to ask." Ethan said softly as he opened it for her.

Carefully lifting the diamond ring that sparkled in the firelight, he paused right at the tip of her finger.

"You know how much I love you." His vulnerability was once more on display. "You make my life better than I thought possible. I need you, your passion, your heart." He glanced down at her hand trembling in his grasp. “I can’t imagine a life without you by my side.”

His bright blue eyes lifted once more to her green ones shimmering with unshed tears.

"Olivia, will you marry me?"

[ohdearhiddles]

SUMMARY: You grew up thinking everything about you was normal, but found that this wasn’t the case. One night, you discover that the normal life you had lived up until then was something of the past because every man you kissed since you turned 16 met a mysterious fate - death. While the world pegs you as a cold-blooded bachelor killer called the “Angel of Death,” you catch the eye of a raven-haired man in an equally black suit.

TITLE: Angel of Death

CHAPTER: 1/?

PAIRING: Loki x Fem!Reader

WORD COUNT: 3501

AUTHOR NOTES/WARNINGS: mentions of death; hello, hello! I came up with this idea really randomly, and I suddenly had an urge to write about Loki... and this happened. It's going to be a very short multi-chapter read - maybe 2 or 3 chapters. I'd put it all on one chapter but it didn't seem right to cram it all in one go. So, here I am with my tiny short story. I hope you guys like it! (AO3 link)

“Last night, another gentleman was found dead in his apartment. Local authorities cannot confirm the cause of death. However, it is believed that this may be connected to a string of mysterious deaths within this very city . Stacy, what do you have to say about your take on this potential serial killer in our midst?” The news anchor spoke loudly, his voice bouncing off of the walls of the small apartment. The television screen panned to a young woman in a lavender blouse, her small hands wrapped around the microphone with her company’s logo displayed on it. She was standing outside of an apartment complex that was bustling with men in dark blue jackets with the letters “FBI” sprawled on the back.

Seemingly unfazed, she spoke, “Sources say that the man was alone at the time of his death, but something tells me that he may have been on a date with our city’s Angel, Frank. There’s no trace of anyone in his apartment and locals are beginning to think he was ‘kissed by Death’s fate’ as they’ve been putting it.”

The news anchor now began to share the screen with the young woman, a joking look on his face even with the current circumstances, “Well, gentlemen out there, watch your backs. We’ve got an Angel of Death loose in our city. Who knows who’ll be next.”

Static filled the screen as the channel changed. You weren’t meant to be watching these kinds of things, not when you already had your suspicions on who the culprit was. Every fear that was within you overflowed, creating an abyss of darkness at your feet. The deceased - the man who was kissed by fate - he was kissed by you.

***

Two years had passed you by since the night all the dots had all connected, forming a big arrow pointed in your direction. It had been two years since you vowed to be alone forever because, no matter what you did, that’s exactly what would happen. If you so much as touched a man with your lips, he dropped dead by the end of the season. You didn’t test this theory, but after you had witnessed a man who had only received a kiss to the cheek being wheeled into the hospital, you didn’t dare try anything else.

An “Angel of Death” they called you. You were described as an angel of misery and destruction, seducing souls with promises of love in order to drag their spirits from their bodies until they were but empty capsules never to move again. It was harsh. The way they described you was harsh, but after you had watched multiple men meet their end, you didn’t see the point in arguing with the description that seemed to be more real than anything else you had tried to come up with.

You were Death in a human’s body. Human. Could you even call yourself that?

The guilt hidden behind every kiss you had administered to others was packed away, pushed into suitcases of repressed emotions that you had readily placed by your door. There was no use in crying over something you hadn’t even thought to be possible until the news proved you wrong. You couldn’t turn yourself in for being a murderer when they would just lock you up and probably run tests on you in order to make some zombie bride war ally. So, you sat. You sat under maple trees, and you sat under stars. You sat and waited for your life to end, waiting for your own Angel of Death to come grab your hand.

***

It was an autumn day. The sky was clear, people were laughing, and your supposed reign of terror on the city was something of the past. Six years had passed since your first kiss of death, and now the news was far too intrigued by aliens invading the city than they were ever intrigued by you. You held a book in your hand as you sat on the park bench, fingers tapping away at the edges as you tried to focus on the words. There was something distracting you. No, not something - someone.

A man sat on the opposite side of you. His hand held an older looking piece of literature, and for the first time in years, you were curious. You were curious about why this man was wearing an all-black suit when the sun was shining so brightly, and you were curious as to what he was reading. Why were his eyebrows furrowed? Was he deep in thought or simply trying to concentrate on the book with all the noise around?

Before you knew it, you were much more interested in analyzing the man than you were in reading your book. You watched as his raven-colored hair glistened in the sunlight, and you wondered if he needed a hat to cool down. His long fingers stroked each page tenderly as he went line by line, and when he was about to turn a page, he would lick the tip of his finger before doing so. The man’s legs were long, slender, and crossed neatly over one another while he sat.

As you watched him intently, you came to an important conclusion: no matter how you looked at him, he was beautiful.

An eternity could have passed you by, and you would have passed peacefully with the amazing view in front of you. But it wasn’t complete without knowing the beauty his eyes might hold. You wanted to see what treasures he hid within them, what secrets you could discover, and right as you thought about it, he looked up.

Your eyes widened as they met his. A small smirk played on the corner of his lips, eyes glistening with an emotion you couldn’t quite make out. Unable to look away, the both of you sat in silence, gazing at the other intently. His eyes analyzed every inch of you, making you feel incredibly self conscious. It was as if he was looking into your soul.

Just like that, though, he was gone. The man stood to his feet, the book in his hand shutting with a subtle clap, and he began walking. His eyes didn’t follow yours nor did he bother looking back, and when he didn’t even smile your way, you hastily gathered your things to go in the opposite direction.

***

You gripped your book tightly in your hand, silently cursing as you walked towards your usually bench. It was a nice day outside, and you were more than happy about being able to finally sit down and enjoy some quiet time, especially with all the children in school at this time. The world wasn’t having it, though, and it apparently wanted you to suffer.

A man sat on your usual bench, arms crossed and facing forwards. The autumn leaves were falling all around him, and part of you begged for your legs to carry you back home. You got closer to the spot and realized that a somewhat familiar face was occupying your space, a familiar man dressed that was dressed in all black.

His eyes met yours like they had days before but there was no reaction this time around. You approached slowly, walking at a pace that seemed more like you were walking down the aisle for a wedding than casually strolling towards an open seat. Your eyes wandered around to the other benches, hoping that there was another one open somewhere nearby. The action proved futile as you witnessed older couples sitting on them, nestling with one another under the golden glow of the morning sun.

There was only one option - sit with him.

You stood before him, almost as if you were a peasant standing before a king. His mere presence felt godlike while yours felt so miniscule. Your grip tightened around the book in your hand, palms sweating from the nerves of confronting this near stranger. His eyes bore into yours and you mentally noted that his eyes were impossibly gorgeous. You couldn’t be quite sure what color they were, but they looked like emeralds in the glare of the sun.

“May I sit here?” You asked politely, pointing to the seat besides him. He didn’t verbally respond, but instead, he gestured to the spot as if he were granting a servant a seat at his table. You felt slightly humiliated yet flustered from the interaction as you sat down.

Silence filled the space between the two of you as soon as you sat down and began reading. There was something in the atmosphere that was saying that you should try to speak to him, but judging by the way he was glaring at every man that walked by the bench, you felt as though speaking to him wasn’t an option. You glanced over from the pages of your book, watching his fingers as they tapped away at his thighs.

“An opportunity,” you thought. He wasn’t holding his book, so maybe he would be open to talking, but as you were about to open your mouth to speak, he beat you to it.

“What is it that you’re reading?” He questioned. For a moment you wondered if he was speaking to you. His voice was like velvet to your ears, and you noted that if his voice were a drink it’d be a smooth bourbon. It’d be masculine yet smooth to the taste, you were so sure of it.

“The Night Shift,” you responded as if it was a title he should have known. His eyebrows furrowed just as they had the other day, and you figured it may have been best to explain further. “It’s by Stephen King.”

“Stephen King.” He spoke, weighing the name of the author on his tongue. “And what is he the king of exactly?”

His question made you laugh, which only earned you a confused glance from the handsome stranger. Stifling your laughter, you raised a hand in apology for the outburst. He nodded in acknowledgment, waiting for you to finish your joyous moment, and for a split second you thought you saw him smile. It wasn’t until you calmed down that you saw that he was, indeed, smiling brilliantly in your direction.

“You smiled,” he spoke again, his eyes wandering to a woman with her child. For a moment, you saw something flash behind them. Sadness, maybe.

The statement made you flinch, the smile disappearing immediately from your face as you felt yourself cowering into the shell you had so readily made for yourself years ago. He turned back to face you, his eyes focusing on yours. Perhaps he wanted to get to know you as you wanted to get to know him, or perhaps he just didn’t have anywhere else to sit when he arrived, but something told you that this encounter may have been fate.

“Whenever you’re here, you seem content,” he continued, eyes still searching yours for an answer to a question he never asked. “But you seem weary all the same. I have never seen you smile.”

He had seen you before; he had just confirmed it. Strangely enough, it didn’t seem as though he had ill intent or obsessive tendencies that just might end with you in a ditch somewhere. No, the raven-haired man seemed sincere.

"It's a pleasant sight," he whispered almost as if you weren't meant to hear it.

You felt yourself smile again, but only a small smile. A sigh escaped your lips, your heart beginning to jump in your chest as you felt a single brick fall from the wall you had painstakingly built around yourself. He smiled, too. And if only for a brief moment, you were glad to have met him.

However, the happiness of encountering “Loki” as he had named himself exactly one week later was quick to deteriorate. Your interactions with the mysterious man continued for days and then weeks. The two of you met for weeks at your bench, bringing new books and stories to share from various parts of your life. The two of you talked for hours underneath the brilliance of the sun’s rays; you talked until the sun itself kissed the horizon, bidding it farewell for the night.

You loved talking to him, and from what you had gathered, he was named after the Norse God of Mischief. He definitely fit the title; in fact, if you weren’t sane for the most part you would have been suspicious that he really was the god who had attempted to take over this very city. You were certain that the real Loki could not possibly be in the city, not with the government still looking for him.

Those thoughts were besides the point, though, especially after the night he was meant to take you out.

At the moment of your slight panic attack, you were flustered over the fact that Loki had requested that you join him for dinner in the evening. For that reason, the two of you did not meet that day even though the sun had shone brightly and there were clouds to admire. Your hands were clawing at your arms as you thought of the endless possibilities in which the night could end, and as much as you wanted to say that a kiss would be the perfect ending, you couldn't let that happen. Even though you repeated the thought that you absolutely did not want to kiss him, your mind rejected it completely simply because you definitely wanted to. Hell, if you didn't have the slight dilemma of causing imminent death after a kiss, you would have done so the moment he told you that he enjoyed your company more than the coworkers he was forced to get on with.

So, it was safe to say that while you had to admit that you were extremely fond of him, it was hard to imagine getting anywhere with a relationship without being able to place your lips on any part of his skin. When you thought thoroughly about it, you decided that you must stop meeting with him once the night was over. If this was a date, or any form of romantic scheme, you could not take part in it. You couldn’t watch another man meet a fate that you had innocently led him to. You would not do that. Not to Loki.

A knock at your door cut through your thoughts like a dagger laced with poison. It was a knock that poisoned your life from that point on, leading you down the abyss you had thought you left behind when you vowed to commit to loneliness. You rushed to find your cell phone that you had just put down seconds before, but as per usual, it was nowhere to be found. The knock sounded again. Huffing, you went to open the door fully expecting to see Loki outside clad in black. The person behind the door was anything but the man you expected; instead, you were faced with a gentleman in a plain suit and a look that told you that he was not there on friendly terms.

“Miss Y/L/N?” He inquired, his chin lifting as he glanced over your shoulder and into the apartment behind you.

“Yes?” You responded, eyes wandering over his outfit, attempting to figure out the nature of his visit. Your attempts proved futile, but that didn’t matter. He was quick to state his business once you had confirmed your identity.

“My name is Detective Francesco, I’m going to need to ask you to come to the station for questions pertaining to a case that has recently opened back up in light of new evidence. Does the name Isaiah Walsh ring a bell to you,” the detective asked, his eyes accusing you of a crime you were only aware you had committed until after the damage was done. You froze in your spot, not sure how to react. Of course, if he hadn't stated his business, you may have thought that he was there to inform you of an accident or a death. This wasn't the case, and those thoughts did not occur to you. Why would they? You were a murderer. Nothing more and nothing less.

Isaiah Walsh - the man who was found dead in his apartment six years ago. A date gone wrong. You simply nodded, not bothering to answer the question in case it would make the detective even more suspicious of you. “Let me grab my things.”

“That won’t be necessary.”

It was clear as the words left his mouth that it was more than just questioning. You were a suspect, not a witness, to the crime he was investigating. As the detective led you down to his car, you noticed a man with raven-colored hair approaching the building with a bouquet of your favorite flowers. The flashing of the police car’s lights illuminated his lean figure as an officer opened the back of his vehicle to you.

Loki’s eyes met yours as he scanned over the scene in front of him. The bouquet fell to the ground, the smirk on his lips vanishing, as he witnessed you sit in the back of the car while a small crowd began to gather at the sight of someone they barely knew getting an all too noticeable escort.

***

You were sitting at a metal table with one of the big mirrors you see on TV. A typical interrogation room from what you could conjure from all the crime show reruns you had indulged in. Your hands folded in your lap as the detective sifted through a file on the table. Part of you wondered why he was taking so long to ask you any questions, but another part of you hoped he never would. Pictures fell from the file as he stood from his seat and your heart dropped to your stomach. It was a pixelated shot of Isaiah with his arm around a young woman at a popular bar just down the road from his apartment. The faces were blurred from the low quality image, but you knew just by seeing the time on the corner along with the date that the woman was you six years ago.

"Look familiar?" Detective Francesco questioned, watching your expression for any significant clue.

You nodded your head, knowing that full cooperation was probably for the best, "I was on a date."

The detective narrowed his eyes, sighing before opening the file again. Within a few seconds, four more security camera shots joined the first on the table. Each one showed the face of a different man with you by their side.

"For months," he began speaking again, "I was wondering why these men were chosen as the Angel's victims, and I couldn't figure it out until one year ago when I realized that the only common factor was you. You were the last person to see any of these men alive: why? Tell me, Miss Y/L/N, do you even remember these men?"

His voice was seething with spite. Your stomach churned and shivers ran down your spine at the look of determination on his face. You glanced down at your wrists, wondering if this was to be the last time you'd see them without steel cuffs on. The detective sat back down, pulling picture after picture from a folder of names you would have rather forgotten; yet, here you were, wearing their deaths as a tattoo on your soul - an imprint of the horrible monster you had somehow turned out to be.

"What about these men?" Detective Francesco pointed out to more photos of gentlemen that you had met at one point in your life. "This one was your high school boyfriend if my sources are correct, and this one," his finger tapped on an all too familiar photo of a face that haunted your dreams, "your own father."

Tears burned at your eyes. Over the years you had accepted many things, but the death of your father was never one. After just one glance at the photo, you found yourself unsure if you had the strength to look the detective in the face anymore.

"I'd like to speak to my lawyer," you mumbled, knowing that this was an uphill fight that you may or may not win. In fact, part of you hoped that you didn't win just so that the demons that crawled into bed with you at night, whispering damning words in your ears and flooding your subconscious with nothing but nightmares, would finally allow you to sleep in peace.

The detective nodded, eyes blazing with a victory he had waited far too long for. There were no fingerprints, no poison, nothing. Just your presence and the men's deaths. Even without substantial evidence against you, this was a start.

"We'll be in touch. You're free to go, but ma'am?"

You met his wicked gaze as you stood from your seat, "Yes?"

"Don't leave the city."

(Chapter 2)

[kiyoomiee]

Submit To Me || Jeon Jungkook

Submit to Me ⟶ [ 2/ ? ]

⟶ genre: wolf au / enemies-to-lovers / fluff / slow burn

⟶ pairing: jungkook x reader

⟶ words: 2k

⟶ sypnosis: Being an omega isn’t easy, you're surrounded by judging eyes and a lot of streotypes. Being an omega isn't easy, especially when your rival is a pure breed alpha named Jeon Jungkook.

⟶ warnings: alpha!JK, omega!Reader, language, consumption of alchohol and weed, a lot of fighting, mutual pining, communication problems, degrading words

⟶ disclaimer: this is a product of my imagination. this is my first post so please bear with the mistakes and grammatical errors, English is not my first language

PART 1 // PART 2

Jungkook’s lips felt soft against yours. Though it tasted like alcohol, it didn’t stop you from wrapping your arms around his nape just to deepen the kiss. The way his tongue explored your mouth was nothing compared to what you experienced from your past relationship. You surrendered yourself completely and kissed him back, hoping that it would take all the pain and frustration that you felt.

“You’re such a tease Y/N. You’re torturing the shit out of me right now.” He was sucking and biting harshly on one part of your neck that you were sure it would totally leave a mark. His irises were in a deep shade of red, a sign that his wolf was taking over.

His hands slid down all the way from your back until it reached your ass. You yelped when Jungkook grabbed your bottoms only to pull you up. Your phone made a sound when it fell on the floor but you didn't care. You and your hands were too focused on roaming Jungkook's shoulders and pulling the strands of his soft curly hair.

You almost whined when Jungkook broke the kiss only to lick and attack your neck. His sudden action caused you to moan and your nails scratched his tattooed arm involuntarily, causing him to hiss. He returned the favor by putting a hand to your waist only to grip it tightly.

“A-Ah shit. Fuck you, Jungkook.”

He chuckled dangerously. Jungkook continued his work on your neck. He ran his fangs on your clavicle causing you to jolt against him as your eyes almost reached the back of your head.

You couldn't think straight anymore and neither could he. Your wolf chanted Jungkook's name over and over, you were starting to give in.

But something felt wrong. Yes, there was something far worse than having Jungkook's tongue down your throat right now. Your body felt hot and your vision started to blur.

"Jungkook wait. Stop." You weakly pushed his chest and gripped his arms tightly to get him back to his senses. He was breathing heavily against your skin when his red eyes slowly turned back into it’s natural brown color.

"Y/N what's-- Fuck!" Jungkook cursed loudly when you passed out against his chest. It took him awhile to get back to his senses but when he finally did he carried you and put you down on his bed.

He stared at you for a moment, realizing what you two just did. His wolf was taking over him when he saw you at the dancefloor. The way you looked and smelled was the last straw. The amount of alcohol he consumed was partly to blame. Jungkook wanted you to submit to him when he pinned you against the wall. He wanted to dominate every part of you so bad that he lost control.

A part of him felt guilty. He knew you were drugged judging by how dilated your pupils were when he looked into your eyes. His plan was to keep you safe yet he took advantage of your current state. He clenched his teeth and kept in mind to punish Taehyung for giving you that cookie.

Jungkook looked away and sighed. He walked straight into his bathroom and turned the water on.

After all that has happened he needed a cold bath to calm him down and help him think straight.

The heat of the sun on your skin is what got you groaning in the early morning. The sudden pain that you felt on your abdomen made you breathe erratically. The beads of sweat on your body irritated you even more. Your lashes slowly fluttered when you finally opened your eyes.

The memories of what happened last night were faint in your head. If the headache that you felt right now wasn’t enough to make you remember then the alpha beside you probably will.

The view made it harder for you to breathe. Beside you was Jeon Jungkook who’s upper body was on full display, gray sweatpants were the only thing that was covering the lower part of his body.

So many thoughts filled your mind, the thought of you two having sex was no exception cause you couldn’t find the clothes you wore last night and your undergarments were only covered by a large white shirt that reached your knees. Surely I would remember if we had sex right? I’m sure Jungkook isn’t the type to make a woman forget. Should I wake him up and ask him to do it again--

And that exact thought was the part that got you running to his bathroom and locking yourself in. Your whole body felt hot. You were thinking about Jungkook, you were ready to pounce at him even. Your abdomen hurts like hell.

You were in heat.

A female’s heat comes every month and lasts for about a week. The heat of males lasts the same but it only comes once a month during winter, which is mating season. You despised it. It's so unfair and it tortures every part of your being. You knew your heat was coming but you never expected it to happen today, especially with an alpha close by. You took every bit of restraint and self respect that you had just to keep yourself locked up and not throw yourself at Jungkook.

Oh Goddess. You called out, hoping that she would prevent you from losing your mind.

Meanwhile, Jungkook's eyes opened quickly when the strong scent of vanilla and lavender filled his lungs. He didn't even bother to stretch his limbs just to find where the sweet smell was coming from.

His lips parted when his brown orbs were slowly turning red, his wolf wanted to take over and he knew exactly why. Any wolf nearby could tell that you were in heat, alpha's most likely. Since alphas and omegas are "destined for each other" they are the ones that are most likely affected when sensing heat.

Jungkook was frustrated that you weren't in his pack, the mind link would surely help to check if you were okay. Atleast she had the decency to lock the door, he thought. Because if you didn't, you two would probably end up in a situation you'll both regret.

For the first time in his life Jungkook didn't know what to do. He just stood in front of his bathroom door as thoughts filled his mind. He badly wanted to help you through your heat yet one wrong move, the everything will be even more complicated than before. It's the heat that's making me like this. The heat. Yes, it's the heat.

Maybe fate was playing with the two of you. You despised one another yet you can't help but to attract each other.

You on the other hand, gathered all the might and courage that you had. Jungkook was startled and took a few steps back when you suddenly opened the door. You didn't even bother to look at him and just focused on finding your things and go. You were panicking inside your head, the clothes that you wore last night were neatly folded on the table beside his king sized bed yet it immediately crumpled when you gathered it without any care. Your main priority was to get out of there immediately yet you couldn't stop yourself from asking Jungkook what happened.

"Jungkook, about last night--" You tried to speak but he immediately cut you off.

"Last night was a mistake Y/N."

Your eyes met his brown orbs that held the same emotion the first time you interacted with him. It was cold, so cold.

"Of course it was. But.. did something happen? Between us?" You asked cautiously.

Jungkook let out the fakest laugh you ever heard as he crossed his arms on his chest.

"Really Y/N? Did you really think that something will ever happen between us?"

"What's with the attitude? How the fuck am I supposed to know? You tell me Jeon, why else would I be wearing your fucking shirt right now?" Your blood was starting to boil because of anger.

"Because you made a fucking mess on your clothes! You really shouldn't be drinking Y/N you know why? Cause your weak ass can't handle simple alcohol. I did you a fucking favor and you're not even a part of my pack." He growled, emphasizing his last statement.

"So that's what this is about? You being a little bitch cause I won't bow down to you? Well guess what? I never will cause submitting to an alpha like you would only prove that I'm weak. I'm glad that I'm not a part of your pack. Anyone would be unlucky to have someone like you as their alpha." You attempted to leave but he caught your wrist before you even made a move.

"Oh yeah? Is that why you had your tongue down on my throat last night? Tell me Y/N, if you hate me so much then why the fuck did you kiss me back?" Jungkook smirked when you were caught off guard by his question.

"It was a mistake Jungkook. We were both drunk." You looked away and refused to look at his eyes. Restraining yourself was already difficult but he made it even harder the moment he touched your wrist.

"I'm pretty sure that you enjoyed it though." You were sure that he knows you're on your heat yet he's pushing both of your patience and limits.

Both of you turned your head's when you heard the sound of Jimin's voice behind Jungkook's door.

"Kook? Who do you have in there? You do know it's dangerous to have an unmarked female that's in heat in a house that has 3 alpha's with no mates right?" Jimin's concerned voice was very clear.

It's a good thing that Jimin's a beta. He could sense the different scents around him yet unlike alpha's, he doesn't go crazy when he smells a female wolf in heat.

Jimin didn't expect to see the two of you when he opened the door. Heck, he knew that you two couldn't stay in the same room without fighting. The sight in front of him made his jaw drop almost instantly. Your cheeks were in a shade of bright red and Jungkook was clearly restraining his wolf. Both of you showed too much skin and the smell of sexual tension was very clear in the air.

When the door was wide open now, you took it as an opportunity to finally leave. But Jungkook’s voice made you stop your tracks.

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m going somewhere where you’re not around.”

“Really? Wearing that? Do you need me to remind you that I’m not the only alpha in house and in this city?” He mocked.

“Oh god! Jimin? A little help here?!” You cried in frustration and you raised your brows at your best friend.

“Okay I’m confused as fuck but I have to side with Jungkook for this one. He’s right Y/N. It’s dangerous for you to go out in that state. How about you go to my room and I’ll go run for some heat suppressants?” 

You parted your lips, trying to make up words to say something but nothing came out of your mouth.

"Don't argue with me on this one Y/N."

You sighed and nodded your head in defeat. His idea was the best one to be used so that you could avoid problems.

But deep down inside you knew you couldn’t stay still and just wait for Jimin to come back, especially with Jungkook around You wanted to get out, the sooner the better.

[mamawolfblood]

Though he didn't know it yet Chris Mclean was in for a shocking revelation. One of the campers is not exactly just some rando kid. This camper is his kid and she is out to expose it.

Name : Iris  Escalona

Age 16

Eye color green

Caramel skin

Black hair that she keeps in a high ponytail. A Cherokee rose on the left side of the hair tie.

Iris is 5ft 8",135lb

Out fit-White tanktop with the alchemists symbol blue acid washed jean shorts black converses

Iris has a dark sense of humor. She loves horror,pranks,is resourceful. Iris is not above smashing some skulls together. She is not quick to anger but Heather pushes a lot of her buttons.

All her life she just wanted Chris to know she was alive. Her mother never gave the reason why she left. She is the oldest of seven children.

____chapter5pt1____

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island… The Killer Bass finally dodged their pathetic losing streak against The Screaming Gophers. There were bruises, tears, risky moves, and dangerous alliances. And in the end, it was Noah the know-it-all who didn’t see it coming. This week, another challenge will send one more camper on a cruise to Loserville. Population: Four. Who will sink? And who will stay afloat? Find out right now on Total. Drama. Island!

Iris walked back into the cabin after a shower. "Oh no this is bad. Im out of fake tan already." Lindsay said concerned. "Then go ger a real tan." Iris said putting her stuff away. "Oh its so tragic" Gwen said sarcastically looking a little more alive today. "Now I have to actually, like, suntan. In the sun! Do you realize how shriveled and wrinkly that can make your skin? Oh, you totally do." Lindsay said now by Gwen. I roll my eyes placing my hair in a ponytail. "See you ladies in the mess hall." Iris said leaving the crazy. "Oh off to find your delinquent boy toy. " Heather tried to get under my skin. "He at least I have a joystick. You should find one maybe you wouldn't be a stuck up bitch all the time." The girls laughed as I left. "That white girl is alright in my book." Leshawna said.

 [over loudspeaker]: "All right, campers! Enough beauty sleep! Time to show us what you’re made of!" Chris said

The campers made it to a make shift out door theater.

(Confessionals)

Iris

"I actually have a good feeling about this. Ever since I was little Dad and mom would take me to see musical and plays. I grew up a theater kid just something about it made it so magical."

*static*

(End of Confessionals)

Lindsay: Are we gonna see a musical? I love musicals. Especially the ones with singing and dancing. Heh." She asked amazed. I had to chuckle at this poor girl.

Trent: Gwen! Saved you a seat." He said moving aside for her. That is adorable I'm happy for them.

Gwen: "Thanks." She said sitting down next to him.

Cody: "W-W-Whoa! Uh, heh." Oh Cody you poor soul. She wont go for you give up already.

*Lindsay blows kiss *

Uhoh someone is braking the rules hahaha poor girl can't see the bitch she is helping.

*Heather turns and waves her ponytail in Lindsay's face. *

As I said bitch.

Lindsay: Oh! [spits out a wave of Heather's hair] "Hey Lindsay come sit with Me and Duncan." I said she got up and sat with us.

Chris: Welcome to our brand new deluxe state-of-the-art outdoor amphitheater! Okay, this week’s challenge is a summer camp favorite. A talent contest!" This made me happy.

Owen: Yes! Awesome!

Chris: Each team has eight hours to pick their three most talented campers.[Katie and Sadie squeal.] These three will represent them in the show tonight. Sing, dance, juggle. Anything goes, as long as it’s legal.[Duncan snaps his fingers.] You’ll be judged by our resident talent scout, former DJ, VJ, and rap legend, Grand Master Chef, who will show his approval via the Chef-o-Meter.[ding ding ding ding ding ding] The team that loses will send one camper home tonight. Good luck.

[whistle blows]

Heather started saying she was the captain. "Who said this Chika" I asked Gwen second it. "Beth and Lindsay"She said crossing her arms. "Fear is not the way to go Heather." I said and everyone backed me. "We shall see halfbreed." She said as I sat down .

It was Trent,Heather and Iris in the talent show for the Gophers.

For the Bass it was Courtney, DJ, Geoff.

Why we were killing time watching the other talents. Heather got ahold of some secrets that she was about to spill.

Cody: What you got there, a journal?

Gwen: Beat it.

Cody: Oh, I get it. Yeah, it’s private, huh? I’m down with that, yeah. It’s cool, brah.

Gwen: What part of beat it don’t you understand?

Cody: [sniffs]

Gwen: What are you, some kind of freak?

Cody: Y-you just… smell… really… pretty.

Gwen: It’s just… soap.

[guitar playing]

Gwen: I won’t even ask.

[guitar playing resumes]

Heather: Look! The first hook up of the season.

Gwen [sarcasticaly]: Oh yeah. We’re going at it big time. I need a swim just to cool off.

[door slams]

[door slams]

Cody groans

Trent: Gwen, wait up! I’ll come with you.

Gwen: Sure. I mean… whatever.

Chris [loudly]: It’s the TDI Talent Extravaganza! [normal voice] Welcome to the very first Camp Wawanakwa… Talent Contest. Where six campers will showcase their mad skills and desperately try not to humiliate themselves. First up for the Screaming Gophers… is Iris.

Iris walks out (a outfit that looks like Melanie from pokemon 2000. The Island maiden.) She started to play on her Ocarina my heart will go on.

It got a seven on the Chef-o-Meter.

Chris: First up for the Killer Bass… make some noise for the big guy! DJ!

[clapping]

Tyler: Woo-hoo!

Katie and Sadie: Yaaaay! Wooo!

[spiritual music]

[swirls]

[whips]

[thud]

Duncan: Ooh-hoo-hoo…

Katie: Gah!

[stretching]

[snaps]

Chris: Dainty and yet masculine. Let’s see what Grand Master Chef thinks.

[ding ding ding]

Chris: Not much.

Chris: So, with two down and four acts to go, it’s the Screaming Gophers… screaming ahead. Next on deck… Trent. Take it away, my bro.

Trent: This one goes out to someone special here at camp.

[guitar playing]

[Trent]

They say that we’ve only got summer

And I say that’s really a bummer.

But we’ll swim in the sun and have lots of fun…

It’ll just be the two of us…

Nothing to do… just hang…

So let me say only this…

Stick around… for just one kiss…

[clapping]

[ding ding ding]

Chris: Nice work! I’m liking your style, dude. And so does Grand Master Chef!

[clapping]

Chris: All right, quit hogging my light, buddy.

[objects tumbling]

Chris: Three down and three to go and the Killer Bass are totally sucking so far. Let’s hear it for Bridgette!

[clapping]

Courtney: Are you sure you can do this?

[stomach rumbling]

Bridgette[with her stomach rumbling]: Ooh. Definitely. No, uh, I’m great. Really. [She burps a few times]

[splash]

Screaming Gophers gasp and moan

Bridgette moans and projectile vomits loudly

Courtney and Heather gasp

Owen: I’m hit! I’m hit!

Bridgette projectile vomits loudly

Katie screams and vomits

Bridgette projectile vomits loudly

Lindsay [loudly] :Hey, puke on your own boyfriend!

Heather: On your own what, Lindsay?

Lindsay [quickly]: I didn’t say, boyfriend.

Chris [nasally] :Clean up in aisle three, four, five, and six! [normally] In the meantime, we’ll take a short break to hose the joint down.

[elevator music]

(Confessional: Bridgette)

Bridgette: Going home won’t be so bad… I-I can always work at the surf shack.

(Confessional Off)

Chris [loudly] : Welcome back to the TDI Talent Extravaganza! [normally] Welcome back. Okay. So in a strange turn of events, Bridgette’s chunk-blowing fest registered two thumbs up by Grand Master Chef. But, it’s not enough to pull ahead the Screaming Gophers, who held the lead with Trent’s love song. So, without further delay, here she is for the leaders… Heather!

[clapping]

Heather: Originally, I was going to dance for you. But instead, I want to celebrate team spirit, with a collaboration.

Iris saw what was in her hand. She started sweating.

Heather: So, with words by Gwen, performance by me, enjoy. [clears throat] Originally I thought he would be different. Even though mom says that my father and I are alike I don't see it. He said I remind him of someone her knew long ago but she left. I found that odd because I was alwats told he left. It doesn't matter either way because I know that Chris Mclean is 100% my biological father. " she said then handing my birth certificate to Chris who looked at me shocked. I got up and ran. Thats not how I wanted him to find out.

Heather: Thank you.

Courtney: [to Bridgette] That was so mean.

Bridgette: Seriously.

Chris: Well then, it’s down to the final act of the night. Can Geoff and his rad stunts turn it around? I seriously doubt it. Let’s find out.

[crashes]

Geoff: Whoa… that kinda wrecks the ride.

Bridgette [nervously] : Now what?! We have to send someone out there or we’re going to lose this!

[luxmaeastra]

Beron hit the ground, he snarled but Xanthos didn't stop. He tackled him pressing his hand to his chest. Beron buckled and clawed at him. But the fire didn't touch him, not with the high lord freshly in him. Xanthos bit at his neck hard as his fingers closed over the Alder Power in him. He ripped it from him and shoved Beron to the ground.

He ignored his sons and watched as the power sink into his hand and through to his body. He barred his teeth to the Autumn Princes who slowly kneeled.

"If you're going to kill him Eris I'd do it now. And since you're in Rhysand's pocket do tell him I wish to speak to him."

Xanthos ignored the way Eris paled and began to shake. It wasn't his problem but internal strife within Autumn only helped him.

He stepped across the boarder to where Kallias waited.

"I know how you will prove your words to me Xanthos."

"Oh? Do tell?"

Was it horrifying they could both just not feel the violence. That they could shut off the emotions? Or maybe that was him and Kallias just pretended he could.

Kallias looked from the unfolding chaos across their border to his twin.

"You will get Vivienne to trust you."

Xanthos eyes went wide and no amount of power kept the fear from his voice.

"Are you trying to get her to kill me?"

Ice blue eyes watched his brother from across the border, his facial expression voice of any emotions. It wasn’t his place to judge, nor was it his place to have feelings as to his brother’s actions. He wanted the power Beron held, he wanted to take control of the seasonal courts. Kallias had already learned his place the hard way, the blade that had stripped him of his position still a vivid memory within his head.

Though, he hadn’t really wanted to be the High Lord. It wasn’t something he was going to openly admit, when he had been taken Under The Mountain, he hadn’t thought that his father was going to do what he had done, he didn’t think he would have rebelled and ended up ending his own life because of it. He hadn’t thought he would have been returning to his court, the new High Lord; barely trained, untested.

It had shown when Xanthos returned and claimed back the powers and title. He smiled when the gravity of his words sunk in, like the fact he would have to get his own mate to trust him. His mate, his Queen of Ice.

Vivienne was not someone who would bow so easily, she had held their court together on her own when he had been away those 50 years. She hadn’t even known at that point he had wanted to marry her; at that point, they had been nothing but friends. She kept their home together without even knowing that he had wanted her, something he ensure she knew when he returned to her.

“I think it is a fair ask, she is, after all, the most well-loved in our court. She kept it together for as long as she did, even though had didn’t have to.”