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lurkingshan · 5 months ago

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The Miracle of Teddy Bear Saved the Gays

Last weekend, both @twig-tea and I had time off and were in the mood to binge something, so Twig suggested we finally watch The Miracle of Teddy Bear. Both of us had missed it while it was airing live (because it didn’t have international distribution) and had been given the impression by others that it had a sad ending that included some anti-queer messages. It was also very long, so we were not exactly rushing to get to it. But we are stubborn and like to judge things for ourselves, so we decided since we had the time and the show was now available, we should jump in. And imagine our surprise when we found out everything we had been told about it was wrong (we have our theories about why). This is one of the best queer dramas we have ever seen, with phenomenal acting, writing, and direction, and we have so much to say about it. The post that follows is co-written by the two of us. Strap in, folks, because it’s a long one.

If you haven’t seen this show yet and don’t want any spoilers, stop reading this right now and head over to YouTube, where international fans can now watch it for free with English subtitles. We’re going to go deep on the show below, and because this drama is designed to slowly reveal information in a very deliberate way, nearly everything counts as a spoiler. We’ll try not to give too much away in the early sections, but be warned!

The Story

The Miracle of Teddy Bear is the tale of a deeply traumatized gay man in desperate need of healing, and the teddy bear who comes to life to help him. In the process of taking care of his person, our bear uncovers deep family trauma and many secrets and lies, accidentally solves crimes, makes lots of friends, heals a family, and saves several lives. He is a very good bear, and through this adventure he contemplates his own existence, learns how to be human, and discovers what it means to truly love someone.

This is primarily a family drama with important things to say about queer truth, and while it includes several bl storylines, it is not a romance. Intertwined with the family drama is a bl show within the show and a series of interrelated mysteries that slowly get unraveled as the story goes on. One of the things this show does best is parcel out information from various perspectives at the perfect time to keep the viewer one step behind—we found ourselves constantly almost guessing what the show was going to do next, but it always chose a direction a little to the left and surprised us in the best way.

In the end, every question we asked was answered, and every time we thought a character’s motivation felt a little too shallow, we were given more. The experience of watching this show was deeply satisfying and really made us feel seen. This show gets us.

The Characters

The Bear: Tofu

Tofu is the titular teddy bear who comes to life via drama magic and does his best to support his person. He starts the series incredibly innocent, and the show and his actor, Inn Sarin, do an incredible job of depicting the change in him as he lives life as a human, becoming more complex and less naive. Tofu is the heart of the show, and it is his love and kindness that enable the growth of the other characters in this story.

The Core Family: Nut, Na, and Kuenchai

Nut is our protagonist, and his struggles with life as a gay man are the soul of this story. He lives with his mom, Na, and their dog, Kuenchai, and Tofu is his beloved teddy bear. Yes, Nut is a cranky ass grown man with a beloved teddy bear. It will make sense eventually, we promise. Nut is a bl novelist working through old trauma via adapting his work for the screen. Na is a woman who has been Going Through It, and while we start the story with only the vague sense that something is not quite right with her, we spend a lot of time on her history as well as her growth in the present until we get the full picture. The way Nut and Na’s stories are tied together gets to several of the core themes of this show (discussed more below).

The Sides: Gen, Song, Prib, and the nosy neighbors

Our cast of friends and allies who support Nut and Tofu and have romantic trials and tribulations of their own. Without giving too much away, we’ll just say this: all of these characters have satisfying arcs, and some of them may have caused us to squeal in delight.

Specters of the Past: Neung and Tarn

Telling you literally anything about them is a major spoiler so just know they are here and they are important and you will fully understand why and how by the end. Oh yeah, and Neung looks exactly like Tofu (or should we say Tofu looks like Neung?) for Reasons (which are explained! We love this show).

Villains: Saen, Sib, Jan, and Parit

Expect these four to show up often and cause a lot of trouble. Their motives and exact crimes are revealed over the course of the show.

Other Elders: Anik, Juea, Kanya and Sittha

They are mostly here to serve a few key plot functions and represent a spectrum of parental figures (related by blood and not) and acceptance of queerness.

And we cannot forget: The inanimate objects

In this show, inanimate objects can come to life under a certain set of magical conditions, and they are Tofu’s friends and helpers along the way. Some of their stories are shockingly touching! They also add some needed levity to the show, especially the grumpy ones. Special shoutout to the cactus and the spare blanket, our crime solving MVPs. We have to admit, the animation for these took a bit of getting used to, but within a couple of episodes we were cheering these creepy blinking eyes on.

The Themes

And here is where we start to get into spoiler territory about specific character arcs. This show had so many clear and well-articulated themes, and they stayed consistent throughout the story.

Queer people can be happy

This is stated explicitly as well as demonstrated through multiple storylines: gay men can love each other, have good relationships and fulfilling sex lives, and get their happy endings. Those who argue that people should fight against their queerness because it will make their lives harder and keep them from happiness are not just wrong, they have it backwards.

Queer people can only be happy by living their truth

This is perhaps the main thesis of this show, and it comes across in so many ways over the arc of the story. We see this theme exemplified in particular through Nut, Tarn, Song, and Gen, with each of them representing different versions of the queer experience that shape who they are and how they show up in the world. Even before the story tells you, it’s clear what kind of experiences each has had from his relationship to his own queerness and his general demeanor and outlook on life. Nut has survived an abusive homophobic father, and that shows up in his anger, his self-protective rejection of others, and his struggle with emotional regulation. Gen has been raised by loving and accepting parents who support his choices in all ways, and this shows in his good humor, balanced perspective, and confidence to be himself. When we say good media should show, don’t tell us its point, this is a fantastic example of what that means.

Accept and love your queer children or pay the price

Relatedly, this story is very interested in the consequences for parents who fail their queer children, and explores a whole spectrum of acceptance from enthusiastic support to negligent ambivalence to misguided suppression to violent bigotry. We see so many different parents and parental figures react to learning about their gay sons and gain insight into them by how they respond—and only the ones who manage to get it together to love and support their kids get to keep their families. Critically, the adults who fail their queer children are convinced they’re acting in their best interests at the time, and we are along for the ride as the redeemable ones go through the stages of first admitting they were wrong but still thinking their intentions justify the pain they caused to fully acknowledging the damage they have done and making amends.

Be patient with others, you never know what they’ve been through

That said, the show also invites us to stop and consider what might be behind aberrant behavior before judging it. Tofu is unfailingly patient with others, and even with the worst people in this story, he always seeks to understand why they are behaving a certain way before giving up on them. The show slowly and methodically reveals information that recontextualizes things we thought we understood and encourages us to keep digging for empathy and missing context. People in this story behave very badly and make a lot of mistakes, but a lot of it becomes more understandable once you have the full picture.

Unprocessed trauma will prevent you from healing and cause you to perpetuate harm on others

Speaking of bad behavior, so much of what’s wrong in this story is driven by unprocessed trauma of one sort or another. Nut’s anger is at its core a deep hurt from being betrayed by the person he trusted most to be on his side. Na’s refusal to live in reality causes her to continue to hurt herself and her son. Saen’s denial about his own actions leads to far-reaching consequences he could not imagine. And the healing process depicted in the show is not linear; people who have made mistakes in the series make them more than once and advance and regress as the situation around them changes.

People are responsible for their own actions and inactions

And while the show is clear that trauma is the source of the bad behavior of these characters, it is also clear that this is not an excuse. Everyone in this story is held to account for the things they do, as well as the things they don’t, no matter how understandable their reasons are. The people who refuse to heal face serious consequences in addition to seeing the damage their unprocessed trauma causes others.

Noble idiocy leads to everyone being unhappy

One of the biggest sources of said unprocessed trauma in this story is characters making self-sacrificial choices for the ostensible benefit of others and bringing misery to everyone in the process. We love a drama that recognizes noble idiocy for the selfish and destructive act it truly is and clearly says you have to communicate with your loved ones if you don’t want to make a mess of everyone’s lives.

You can’t appease an abuser

No amount of hiding who you are or making yourself small will convince an abuser to treat you better or guarantee your safety. This theme is most obvious in the main storyline between Nut, Sib, and Na, but Jan is another example of a manipulative and emotionally abusive character who other characters continually try to play nice with, to no avail. She takes every opportunity to be cruel, whether the person she’s talking to is kind or combative in return. The show reinforces that abusers will always find an excuse to justify their behavior; changing yourself for them is pointless.

Love is wanting the best for someone, even if that means letting go

This is really the show’s core point where romance is concerned: being with you may not actually be what is best for the person you love, and if your love is true you have to accept that. The people who could not see this—Saen and Jan—were the ones who continued to cause harm to their loved ones and themselves, while the characters who honestly worked towards the happiness of their beloveds even if that happiness was not with themselves—Tofu, Tarn, and eventually Prib—were rewarded by seeing that happiness play out and ended our story truly content. The MVP of this theme is Tofu, whose pure teddy bear love for his person became more complicated and selfish as he became more human. But in the end, he held to the truth at his core that Nut’s happiness was his happiness.

You can have more than one great love, and one doesn't tarnish the others

Which brings us to one of the most beautiful takeaways from this show, and something that dramas so rarely do well. Nut loves two different men, neither more than the other, and he never chooses between them. They both hold important meaning in his life and he honors that whether they are with him or not. When Nut is with Tofu, he remembers his past love with fondness but he is clear that these memories do not make his love for Tofu any less real. A lesser show would have had those moments where Nut was thinking about his past cause him to distance himself from Tofu. But in this show, Nut sharing his past and working through his lack of closure was when he and Tofu had some of their closest and happiest moments together. This show is extremely clear that we can have happiness with more than one person over the course of our lives, and it is not only okay but encouraged!

The Resolution

From here, we will be talking about the ending, and so by necessity will no longer be avoiding major spoilers. If you’re intrigued by the above and want to avoid being spoiled fully, stop now! One of the things that is so brilliant about this show is the way information is slowly revealed, so if you think you would like this show we recommend experiencing it for yourself. If you’re still not convinced and need to know the ending before you decide, read on.

In our view, this story ends exactly as the show signals it will from the very beginning—and the way it should—and the ending is unambiguously a happy one. Tofu realizes that he and Tarn’s life forces are tied together, that it was Tarn going into his coma that caused him to awaken, and that as long as he continues to live as a human, Tarn will not recover. We and the characters have come to love Tofu in his guise as a human, but the truth is he does not belong there��he is a teddy bear, and for him to stay by robbing an actual human being of their life would be wrong. The story took pains throughout to show us how tenuous and restricted Tofu’s existence is, because he is not a real person and thus can’t live a full life (for example, he can’t get a job or safely leave the house because he doesn’t have documentation or any life experience). We also see Tofu struggle so much with the added complexities of the human experience that he becomes ill with overwhelm multiple times. He repeats to us through the whole story that all he really wants is to be a comfort to Nut. While he finds value and joy in being human, it does not change who he is at his core. And so he allows himself to be poisoned by Jan, sacrificing his human existence to bring Tarn back and exposing Jan and Saen’s crimes in the process.

With this decision, the other characters get the chance to mourn him and move on. Nut grieves, finally makes the connection between human and teddy bear Tofu, goes to therapy (!), makes peace with his mother, and writes his love story with Tofu as his next show. Tarn wakes up and begins his recovery, and he and Nut slowly reconnect and rekindle their relationship over time. Na finds joy in her lucid moments and enjoys time with her family, finally free of the hell Saen and Sib unleashed on her life. Gen and Song get their happy ending with acceptance from Song’s dad, and Prib’s fixation on gay men becomes clear when her new female love interest enters the scene (let’s go, lesbians!). We get confirmation that the nosy neighbors are, in fact, an elder gay couple. Even Kuenchai and some of the inanimate objects have character arcs! Kuenchai is instrumental in making sure Nut is reunited with bear Tofu, and we get to see a slipper gain some independence from her other half and a grumpy bolster cuddle in to comfort her people when they need it.

We end our story with several happy families who love their gay children and a call for marriage equality via Nut and Tarn deciding to marry whether it’s legal or not. Tofu is a bear again but his human life is very much not forgotten—Nut speaks to him every day, honors the love they shared, and talks about him openly with Tarn. And we even hear from Tofu again, see a final moment between him and Nut in a beautiful dream, and are reassured that Tofu is happy to still be with Nut in his original form and to see him living so well. It’s everything he wanted, and he made it happen. He truly is the very best bear.

The Purpose

We wanted to take some space to get a little extra meta and talk about why this show matters so much in the broader queer media landscape. First, it was a landmark queer television event in Thailand—please read this post by @flowerbeasblog to get the background on its significance in the cultural landscape. This show was broadcast very intentionally to educate and send a message to a broader audience in Thailand than is typically reached via bl dramas. And that’s why understanding and taking its themes seriously is so very important.

This is a story that is deeply rooted in queer truth, written by a queer man who wants people like him to be seen and understood. The show puts forward an unapologetically pro-gay message on broadcast television (on a major national network! during primetime! that does not shy away from the sexual component of queer love!) and embeds important political commentary in a fantastic and engaging story in a format familiar and comfortable for the Thai audience. It’s not meant to be received as a romance, and its nuanced and mature take on love and relationships is certainly not designed for ship wars. The writer even turns directly to the camera and underlines this in the final episode: while he respects the importance of bl in the media landscape, he has a bigger agenda in mind for this show and important things to say.

And that’s why some of the discourse around this show is so frustrating. A small portion of international fans who watched this show live seemed to misunderstand it deeply and created such a false impression of it that it caused others to stay away. Contrary to some of the takes out there, this show does not have a sad ending, Tofu’s resolution is not remotely anti-queer, and there is no woman who ends up with Nut (we are so confused that this was anyone’s interpretation; Nut at every age and several times within the show explicitly shouts about how very extremely gay he is). To see this story as a tragedy because Tofu “dies”—which he doesn’t; his human body disappears but he returns to being a conscious and content teddy bear—is to misunderstand Tofu’s character journey, his narrative purpose, and his agency. We can only assume that shipping got in the way of comprehension here, and people who wanted to see human Tofu and Nut end up together focused on that to the exclusion of pretty much everything this show was saying and doing.

At the end of this story, Tofu is happy. To think that Nut was better off with Tofu than with Tarn is to not allow for the complexities of human experience; Nut did love Tofu, but he loved Tarn, too, and their relationship was a positive force in his life both before and after Tofu entered it. And Tarn was an actual gay human man in a coma who could not wake up while Tofu existed. Tofu was the creation of Tarn’s love for Nut; his existence was limited, and he found being a human extremely difficult. All Tofu wanted was to be Nut’s teddy bear and stay with Nut forever. He wanted Nut to be happy, because Tarn wanted Nut to be happy, and during his time as a human he worked to enable that happiness. He was instrumental in moving forward several stuck characters and uncovering many secrets, all of which were necessary for Nut to get to where he ends up at the end of the show. Being in a relationship with Nut was a bonus. He enjoyed the experience of being in love with Nut, but in the end he chose to sacrifice his human life so that Nut could have a permanent, lasting happiness with someone who was real. Tofu’s human death is not an example of the bury your gays trope; in fact, it is a total rebuke of it. Tofu, and this show, saved the gay men in this story and gave them full and happy lives. We cannot recommend watching and supporting this show enough.

#the miracle of teddy bear #thai drama #thai bl #long post #intergenerational trauma challenge

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writingwithcolor · 1 year ago

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Afro-Latine Jewish woman maintaining cultural connection in an isekai comic

Anonymous asked:

Hello! Mixed Latin American nonbinary Jew here. I'm working on a, relatively light-hearted, isekai-style fantasy comic concept of an afro-latine Jewish lady who gets sent through a portal to a colorful scifi/fantasy land, inhabitated by various imaginary creatures sorta like in Alice in Wonderland. She gains magic powers and goes on adventures, working as a scientist researching the land's magical energy. (some of the local creatures she befriends are entirely original species, and some are inspired by my local folklore, but otherwise I try to avoid culturally coding the creatures since they're mostly nonhuman looking). The story isn't supposed to touch any heavy topics like antisemitism or racism, but I've read about the cultural problems in ""normie protagonist finds a new home in a funky fantasy world"" stories, f.ex. how Harry Potter's narrative basically implies that Muggleborns have to abandon their original cultures in order to successfully integrate into the very prejudiced but ""cooler"" Wizarding World. My original goal was to break the mold that escapism fantasy usually revolves around white protagonists adventuring in heavily Western-inspired fantasy worlds, and poc-coded characters are usually nonhuman creatures or racial stereotypes. However the protagonist girl in my story comes from a loving, latine-jewish human family, and while she regularly visits them on Earth instead of just staying in the fantasy land 24/7, I'm afraid that making her story be about being happy adventuring in a separate imaginary land filled with nonhuman characters might turn into an ""abandon your family and culture"" narrative. Are there any ways how I could avoid this? Maybe making the fantasy land's worldbuilding and designs more Latin American or Jewish inspired and thus resonate more with her cultural background, or making it clear that the land is not ""perfect"" and she still loves her family?

One of the first things that stands out to me is that you haven’t set her up to need to abandon her culture in order to make a life in another place. She has the ability to go home and visit her family, but I also don’t see any reason why, if she lives primarily in the fantasy land, she couldn’t be portrayed as practicing Judaism actively in her new home. It’s true that Judaism isn’t solely defined by religious/cultural practices, but it’s also true that religious/cultural practices are one of the most recognizable and most uniting elements of Jewish identity.

I think it might help in this case to think about Jewish practices in terms of communal versus personal: that is, what are practices she would need to seek out a Jewish community for, and what are practices she can do independently?

Does she control when she is able to visit her family? If so, visiting for Jewish holidays so that she can be at a family meal or holiday services seems like a way to highlight that she is just as connected to her family as someone who moved to a different city might be. If she experiences/has experienced the death of a family member or partner, going home to be with a Jewish community for shiva or to say kaddish on a yahrzeit is another touch (for readers who may be unfamiliar, Jewish mourning practices are intensely communal and are intentional about bringing the mourner into an active support system and slowly reintroducing them to the world, and as such a mourner is likely to spend this time somewhere where they can access and be supported by a Jewish community).

As far as practices she can engage with on her own in the fantasy setting, it would be nice to see her observing Shabbat, either in a traditional way by refraining from adventuring and instead engaging in hospitality and prayer between dusk Friday and sundown Saturday, or in a less-halakhic way if she comes from a Reform or comparatively-assimilated background, by marking Friday sunset with candles, blessings, and a good meal, even if she is intending to continue her research through the next day. She would hardly be the first Jewish person to live in a place without an established Jewish community, and a festive meal can be shared just as happily with non-Jewish friends if they’re griffons and fauns as if they’re Christians and Muslims.

Here’s one idea that I think would be hugely meaningful as a way of establishing both that she intends to make her home long-term in Fantasy World and that she intends to carry Jewish traditions with her into her new life: hang a mezuzah.

Think about it: a mezuzah is the visual marker of a Jewish home, as much to the resident as to a guest. When she is home from her adventures, in her garden cottage or enchanted tower or wherever she returns to between adventures to record and categorize her research, simply showing a mezuzah in the background instantly makes the point both that she is intending to stay, and that this is a Jewish space. If as time goes on she adds other Judaica items to her space, it can add to the sense that her Jewishness is present and alive in this world, simply because she is present and alive in it.

If she doesn’t have a settled space or if you’re not planning on setting any scenes there, having Jewish visual markers on and around her can help, too. For low-hanging fruit, maybe she has a silver Jewish Star or chai necklace that catches the light now and then, but since you’re going for a light, fun vibe, maybe she’s packing her adventuring supplies in a bright-blue vinyl backpack emblazoned with “Temple Shaarei Tzedek Junior Youth Retreat 1998” (am I old? I’m pretty sure there are adults reading this who were in Junior Youth groups in 2003, but I’m willing to bet retreat swag hasn’t changed that much).

I do like the idea of including Latin American and Jewish elements in the worldbuilding, especially as an intentional way to combat the cultural dominance of Western European folklore over fantasy writing, but because your character is from and has access to our world, you have the beautiful opportunity to carry real-world markers of Jewishness with her as well.

-Meir

I adore Meir’s answer, but then, I’m the kind of person to whom “enchanted tower with a mezuzah” as an aesthetic is so near and dear to my heart that I wrote a whole fantasy series about it. Couple of random suggestions: one thing I really enjoy is exposing my gentile friends to Jewish food—I love watching the absolute shock of delirium hit someone’s face the first time they taste my charoseth. Imagine this little bowl of chopped apples and walnuts, looking vaguely dirty because they’re soaked in cinnamon-infused wine, so it’s basically dingy beige slop….so that first bite of sensuous, deep sweetness is a huge surprise. Pick your favorite equivalent and imagine the first time a centaur or a winged princess or whatever other fantasy character tries it at your MC’s behest! (Feeding brisket to dragons would make a great name for…something…)

I don’t think you’re likely to do this anyway but since these are public answers: “fantasy world fun, Jewish upbringing a chore” is a narrative I would not feel at home in or care to read. But that’s a rather predictable remark from me anyway ;)

And of course I support the “the secondary fantasy world is actually Jewish” solution too, having one of my own.

–Shira

#Jumblr #Jewish #Judaism #Afro Latina #Afro Latine #Culture #Jewish culture #Jewish holidays #asks

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wen-kexing-apologist · 11 months ago

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I am being haunted by the strength and the beauty of this one moment right here

gif by @forcebook

Perhaps it’s because so many BLs have been loud about marriage equality, or perhaps it is because Thailand is currently in the midst of voting on a marriage equality bill that I have this on the brain, but I feel like this moment was a really powerful and poignant statement for me. Aof as a director tends to be pretty overt with his metaphors, while he often makes his symbolism obvious he anchors it so strongly in the storytelling and scene that it never really reads as cheesy to me. But something that I haven’t noticed Aof do too much of is directly call out marriage inequality. Like, in Our Skyy 2 he had Phupa and Tian get engaged but I don’t recall any moment where the two of them were like “ah, dang it sucks that we don’t have marriage equality, let’s still just get engaged” and with Moonlight Chicken the callout we get ties directly in to Beam’s parents exploiting marriage inequality to take everything they could from Jim. And I don’t know what will happen in Episode 8 when we go to Aon’s wedding, but it does not escape my notice that this fake proposal from Mhok really signifies to me what queer people in Thailand are currently stuck with. Fiction.

We’ve had innumerable shows have their couples get engaged or married in spite of the law, but they still have no legal rights, there are still ways they can be fucked over from that. Aon and his (now) fiance have the tangible ring, the real proposal, the real ring, the real wedding. And Mhok and Day for now can put an emotional charge/weight in to Mhok’s re-enactment of the proposal fueled by a new found love and a pretty consistent attraction, but they can’t be legally married, and so Day gets an invisible ring. And I have no idea if that was an intentional jab at Thailand on Aof’s part, but I do know that is what immediately came to mind for me.

I hope that the marriage equality bill passes its next two rounds of voting, because I really want to know what Thai BL looks like once that fight is over, and what mantle they will pick up next.

tagging @bengiyo, @lurkingshan, @waitmyturtles, @neuroticbookworm, and @shortpplfedup as evidence that I can, in fact, write short posts!

#last twilight the series #last twilight #aof noppharnach

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waitmyturtles · 3 months ago

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I LOVE 4 MINUTES.

I love it! GAAAAAHHH, I love it. While Be On Cloud’s KinnPorsche was so BL-referential, I just love this juicy Dr. Sammon-mystery genre that takes us out of trope-land. Queer murder mysteries, my beloved.

I have no theories, per se, about where I think this show is going, but I am going to jot down some observations for my own posterity and memory. After reading some theories on Twitter (including one that Dr. Sammon herself retweeted), I went back and fast-forwarded through all the episodes so far, so here are my notes (and these VERY WELL may have been repeated in the tag, so I apologize if I’m just pooping what we’re already assuming here).

1) This Twitter account noted that Tonkla saw his cat in episode 1, after what-we-assume-to-be present-day boing with Korn. Tonkla sees this AFTER Korn rushed off after getting off the phone. After this week’s episode, we seem to be informed that said cat had died in the past.

We also know that Tonkla has a habit of lighting up after sex and during times of duress.

There might be more than just tobacco in those cigarettes he’s lighting up, I’m not sure, but we also know he hits the shabu, pipe-wise.

Besides Great being in what I assume to be, and what I call, a fever-state, or better phrased, a cardiac episode, I am assuming that Tonkla is transcending his own lines of reality through drug use.

1a) [(A quick aside: I just wanna say that I will be VERY. CURIOUS. as to how Tonkla’s drug use is positioned alongside his predilections for unprotected sex, and if I think there will be public health commentary in this. Drug use is, of course, generally not recommended by medical professionals, and at the same time, it’s a culturally important element of many facets of queer culture that many physicians who work with LGBTQ+ patients are trained to be aware of; for example, using poppers to ease the process of preparing for intercourse. I don’t know if the show means to indicate that Tonkla, vis à vis being on PrEP and meth at the same time, is an automatically unsafe person…but he also might be a murderer… so yeah, I will be curious about this underlying public health messaging.)]

1b) (Speaking of public health, yo, we needed those Durex bottles in episode 4, YOWCH.) (😬) (ANYWAY.)

2) So, speaking of Great and Tonkla living in their own realities, I also want to posit that Tyme has created his own sense of delirium by literally not sleeping.

Homeboy is on his shifts, he’s working out, he’s solving mysteries, he’s kicking literal ass, he’s investigating and courting Great, he’s following Korn. He’s doing a lot! We haven’t caught him sleeping yet, again, literally.

I wonder if this may be Dr. Sammon commenting on the culture of insanely long shifts for doctors, which impacts their mental and physical well-being. We’ve also separately learned that Tyme is driven by revenge, and by a need to support his grandma and save Nan. But how can he do all of that, if he’s physically depriving himself of the ability to rest? I don’t know if this is going to go anywhere, but I do notice the camera work, whenever Tyme is scrubbing out of a shift, re-centering from a tilt, which makes me wonder about what these shots are telling us about his mental state (and we saw comparable camera work when Tonkla thought he saw Dome).

(I’m also not forgetting that the show shows him stabbed at the very start of the series, and I’m constantly wondering about that.)

3) Finally, I want to offer that Korn, Great, and Tyme are not out. At least for Great and Tyme, does that contribute to a delirium mindset (and maybe even Korn, too) by way of the stress of holding in secrets? (Please note that this linked article is from 2004 and does not have fully updated terminology.)

I don’t know if this theory holds for Great, because a popular theory for him at the start of the series was that he may not have realized he was gay until he met Tyme. I don’t know that I saw that in my very-fast rewatch except for his surprised looks during the stitches moment in the hospital. Great’s comfort with Tyme in the car after the claw machines makes me think he knew more about his sexuality, and his physical separation from his family at the dinner table in episode 1 also makes me wonder if he realized his preferences were always going to separate him from his nuclear family. I’m not sure, but I’m chewing on this.

4) So, where I’m gonna go entering into episode 5 is that there isn’t a centered or accurate “present day” for anyone….mayyyybe except for Korn, who is certainly living his own fever dream of being stuck in a reeeeeeally bad job, but maybe isn’t being subjected to mental delirious psychoses (just, you know, the general stress of hating your work thoroughly). But I could be wrong there, too, because we know that Korn is driven by greed, filial piety, and a desire to take over the family business. So maybe that’s creating a delirium of his own, one that takes him away from his boyfriend for weeks at a time.

4a) (By the way, isn’t it interesting that we are not seeing NC scenes with Korn and Fasai? I know, I know, Be On Cloud does queer/BL content, but. I think it’d be interesting if the show ran the gamut of intimacy. Just a thought.)

Anyway! This show is so good, it’s making me babble. I absolutely love it, and it is the comeback that Bible Wichapas deserves.

#4 minutes #4 minutes the series #4 minutes meta #greattyme #great x tyme #tyme x great #jesbible #jes jespipat #bible wichapas #basfuaiz #korntonkla #korn x tonkla #tonkla x korn #separately #I AM LOOOOVING JJ’s PERFORMANCE #man is he ever nailing a brooding investigator-type

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accio-victuuri · 19 days ago

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it’s been a while since i’ve shared my recent reads! so here’s what i have picked up in the past months. felt inspired cause i’m really enjoying the story i’m reading now, w/c i initially picked up as a manhwa but i’m impatient so i switched to the novel. it’s called the hunter is gonna lay low or the hunter wants to live quietly. it’s such a gem! cause it starts of pretty simple and funny then the author manages to put in the plot and well, it’s plotting. lol.

if you like systems/dungeons, cast of characters, time travel, mystery and the most delicious slow burn then this is for you. i hope this gets animated at some point cause it’s so good! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 this is the only novel on the list so it’s pretty special that the story led me to WANT to read the source.

i’m literally listing what i’ve read so yeah. and pretty much a v short reaction to it cause there is a lot (53). it’s a mix of ongoing and completed works at the time of writing and when i read it so i’ll mark that too.

1. Sweetie, Sweetie, Sweetie - this title is so misleading cause you would think it’s a modern story full of sweetness when it’s not. this deals with kingdoms/royalty, superpowers �� and isekai.

2. How my Daddies Became mates (completed) - first foray into mangas because i most prefer manhwa/manhuas — i know, sacrilege. but yeah, it’s a cute story of two dad telling their kid how they met and fell in love. It’s so wholesome! a short read when you feel tired of all the toxic bl stories. 😂😂😂

3. Unintentional Love Story (completed) - pick this up! it’s so good! slice of life kind of vibe and falling in love in a small town.

4. Someone like You (completed) - this was something i started before and went back in now that it’s completed.

5. Isekai no Sata Wa shachiku shidai - i don’t really go for Mangas but this one pulled me in! I love myself some isekai plot. it’s just sad that no one has updated the translation for so long so that may put some people off in picking this up.

6. Bend over Backwards (completed) - corporate slave x international model. if you like this kind of dynamic then go ahead. Only 40 chapters plus a bunch of side stories so this kind of thing is a good choice.

7. Dinner with a Vampire - pretty obvs with the title.

8. Mister Wonderful teases me

9. Romance but not Romantic - omegaverse! the kind where the omega needs the alpha but initially hated him.

10. Be, Be. - omegaverse with modern royalty!

11. Smoky Nectar 1 - a short read that continues to a part 2 and it’s good ✌🏼

12. Smoky Nectar 2

13. Reincarnated to Devil King Evelogia’s World - this is so uniquely unhinged that it became. endearing. No. I swear. I haven’t read anything like it. I love it tho. Maybe some people will find it over the top but it’s now one of my personal faves.

there’s an animated version of it if you wanna start with that just to see how cute they are lol.

14. Bullying the Dog - an MC who didn’t get much love then he meets the ML who shows him what it’s like. it’s so somft.

15. Bittersweet Martini (completed) - i’m gonna cheat here and copy/paste the first comment on this story cause i think it perfectly describes the story: “If you're looking for a casual pleasure read with a green flag story with heavy flirting, which leads to a lot of blushing but also deals with a more serious topic towards the middle, without leaning too much into the drama, then look no further.”

16. Over the Paradise - guideverse with zombies!

17. Hero vs Villain - what happens when the supposed hero and villain become friends and fall in love? this was so nice!

18. Night of London - vampire and werewolf pairing! come on! Let’s gooooo! 🙌🏼

19. Kill my love - omegaverse and assassins!

20. Turning - Another work that i would most likely pick up the novel version cause it’s that good! Regression theme! ❣️plus the setting is they are in a kingdom where people have powers.

21. The Moon is coming to me - I have already talked bout this before and it’s one of my absolute faves! I didn’t know the Manhua was released! So i was so happy to enjoy it in that form. The translation for this is very close to the end so pick it up!

22. Cozy Obsession - transmigration where the MC knows how the story goes so he is trying his best to change the ending.

23. Summertime (completed) - one of my favorites! love it when friends become lovers and some may say the ML here is manipulative but i wanna say in a good way. lol. anyway, it’s classic, atleast from the MC’s side that you’ve known this person some time and that summertime everything has changed.

24. My way with you (completed) - gonna cheat again with this one by pasting here what someone commented: “LISTEN UP GUYS this one has everything: healthy happy relationship, supportive friends, trauma and healing, mysterious past connections, beautiful men, hot af smut, 100% consent, cutest lovey dovey couple, NO drama, NO “misunderstandings”, NO second ml, NO annoying interfering side characters. You will cry, but because it’s just so good.” 💯

25. Netkama Punch - i haven’t finished and progressed much as i would like tho i know a lot of people have this as their favorite! I will get back to it! The premise of hidden identity and online gaming is one of my fave so i will surely pick this up again.

26. Through the Years - i haven’t finished this yet but it’s a lot of people’s fave

27. Fools (completed) - disillusioned guy meets excitable puppy 🤍

28. Moonquake (completed) - a very unique concept. people on earth have powers and then some of them decided to rebel and live in the Moon. Our MC is one of the best ones on earth and is supposed to bring down the leader of the rebellion. but you all know what happens, they fall in love! AHHHHH! and i have to say the art in this too is exceptional.

29. Men’s wear store and the Royal Princess (completed) - this may be weird for some or slow / not enough action lol. i enjoyed it tho! the MC cross dresses and finds someone who loves and accepts him!

30. Ex Hot Neighbor (completed) - a story that centers around a misunderstanding! MC thinks he can’t date the neighbor cause he’s his friend’s ex. but nope!

31. Forest Sea (completed) - A good and solid fantasy story. Please give it a try! The whole birds vs snakes thing was kinda weird at first but the author made it work.

32. When you were asleep - this hasn’t been updated in a while and it’s so sad because the art is topnotch! the plot is good too, especially the dreamscapes but there’s still a lot to discover cause we wanna know what happened in the past. Why is MC even having these dreams and all that.

33. Beum & Go’s Unholy…. - still ongoing and read few chapters

34. Spring, the color of love (completed) - what a wonderful story. Oftentimes, as a reader, you have that sense of boundary with the narrator. But this one — you can feel and understand what the MC is thinking and going through. even tho i haven’t experienced what he did, i can totally get it. this is one of those tropes where they fall in love during their school years and some misunderstanding happens, they meet again years later and try again. something i would love to re-read even if there are parts of it that hurt. and it’s just proof that if something is meant to be, it will come back to you.

35. Keep Holding On (completed) - a short and sweet read with friends to lovers trope!

36. Wolf in the House (completed) - i am so late with this cause i feel like every list has this story as one of the best. I have to agree! it’s so good! tho i have to say i’m more attached to the second pairing. this one is a perfect mix of fantasy, action, comedy and romance. A solid recommendation!

37. Touch within the Abyss (completed) - AAAAAHHHHHH! a hitman x blind cinnamon roll! read it now! please! it’s so sweet! their love and care for each other is so pure 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

38. 99% in love season 1 (completed) - from bestfriends to lovers in the cutest way! they start fake dating and it leads to more obvs.

39. 99% in love season 2 - their college life and this one has smut scenes!

40. Alpha Trauma ( novel ongoing ) - if you know Omega Complex then you might be aware that this is a sequel of sorts but follows the second lead’s love story if you may. Everyone loves Dohyun so i’m one of those happy readers who is happy that he gets his own story, tho the POV in this is not his but his Omega. If you like ABO and campus setting then this may be for you.

41. Soul Sealer’s school life - The MC is the soul sealer who has to do good deeds to prolong his life, then he meets the ML who has a strong spirit in him. It’s a perfect blend of fantasy, comedy and not so much romance as of the moment. The art is 💯 and i really like to see where this goes!

42. Guidance with Benefits - still ongoing and read few chapters

43. Chiguha Kuna Kisu (completed) - if you like a short read that will make you have overall good vibes then this is it. school setting, two cute boys, a fortunate miscommunication and starting a relationship. it’s so good and made me want to look for more mangas! 🤍

44. Spicy Milk Candy - yandere but in a good way. that’s all i’m gonna say.

45. Ruby Red wo Kamikudaku (completed) - i’m just gonna add the summary below but it’s truly a unique read!

Akane is an Omega who can see people's pheromones as multicolored "crystals”. During his school days, when he was lonely because of his peculiar constitution, he meets Makise, a school nurse teacher. 5 years later, they are miraculously reunited, but Makise has a secret

46. Yume Nara Doko Made Yurusaremasuka (completed) - corporate slave x young policeman. 6 chapters of sweetness!

47. Sparkling Baby (completed) - this is supposedly a sequel for the second lead, but i haven’t read the first story. I just love how the MC/ML first met and then made a mark on each other as strangers — but it wasn’t there time yet. and so they meet again later and navigate their lives together. What attracted me to this story is how the MC changed because of love. For years, he had this sense of what he think is love and looking back, maybe it didn’t work out because love isn’t supposed to be like that. What he found with the ML is real and why it feels different.

48. Ashita kimi no mono ni shite (completed) - this so wholesome! school setting and friends to lovers. quiet boy x cool guy

49. Koibitu Keiyaku chu ni suki (completed) - friends to lovers! fake dating. and well, look at them. so precious together:

50. Camboy Bunny (completed) - i think the title says it all. A delicious read!

51. Beyond the Memories - AAAAAHHHHHHH! the story in itself should be sweet and fluffy but the author manages to squeeze in the undercurrent of there is something wrong. as a reader, there is something big that we don’t know and once it comes out — all of it will be shattered. it looks like there is some sort of regression and MC doesn’t know this but the ML does. The question here is when his memories will come back and will he forgive the ML. We are not in that part yet with what’s available right now so i’m excited!

52. Private Call (completed) - another omegaverse.

53. Senza Replica - guide/esper. very few chapters out and something i will go back to.

I read everything except the novel at BATO. 🫶🏼 covering my may-october 2024 reads.

#personal #accio victuuri reads #book recs #manhwa recs #manhua recs #bl recommendation #danmei recs #manga recs #aside from yizhan and work the rest of my time goes to reading lol

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dinadumas · 1 year ago

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Hiiii~

Dear novels lovers, I sincerely want to recommend you one of the best works I've read. So if at the moment you are in search of something interesting don't pass by!

This novel actually has a manhwa with the same title, so if you're not interested in the novel you can find and read the manhwa! It does not have any plot discrepancies from the original.

"Turning" by Kuyu (쿠유).

It's a novel in the bl, fantasy, and omegaverse genre.

Wait wait. Those who now thought that the omegaverse is not interesting or poorly written, you are sorely mistaken! The novel itself doesn't pay that much attention to this genre, so you won't feel any discomfort while reading it! I even forgot about this genre at times. (Although most of the hot scenes are related to it, but you'll be satisfied, I promise.)

There are approximately 970 chapters in the original, and 305 are available in English (free).

If you are already a bit interested, please read the description first~

Yuder was a commoner Omega who rose to the top with his ability.

When he woke up again after being falsely accused and executed, he was back 11 years ago before everything began.

He must not repeat the same mistake he did before.

A chance to get back……

To survive, and to save the world, now he had to save the man he had killed!

Are you more interested? Jesus, I love you already. Keep going!

If you want to hear the opinion of someone who has already read all the chapters available in English, @armed-teddy-bear answered some questions especially for you!

Q : Dear reader, please tell us what you liked most about the novel "Turning" by Kuyu?

Teddy : It’s hard to pinpoint a single part of it, since all of it is perfect in my eyes. The characters are well-written and never act like walking tropes with no common sense, the worldbuilding is one of the best I’ve ever seen, the intrigues are taking and all well-linked together to form an enduring mystery and drama that, as of 300 chapters, is still just as interesting…

If I really had to pick, I would say the relationship between the two protagonists is honestly a high point. Heavily influenced by the past only Yuder can remember, it still manages to progress naturally while never having a boring moment. Every scene where the two of them interacted became one of my favorites.

In short, I would say: If you think you’ve read a novel like this before, no you haven’t. In my opinion, this novel is the best you could achieve in the genre of rebirth/time travel.

Q : Do you think the omegaverse genre is ruining the novel?

Teddy : It’s not a problem to me at all. But there are a lot of people who are uncomfortable with it. I don’t understand why exactly, but it’s like that.

On the contrary, I think the way Turning handles it makes it even more interesting. It hasn’t played too much into the story that far, so it could even be ignored by people who don’t like it, but I think it adds to the story quite a bit by adding more worldbuilding to the “awakeners” characters and the powers of this world.

The reason given for why it happened in universe is also good in my opinion. 👍

So it’s a complete OK for me!

Q : Can you highlight any flaws in the novel?

Teddy : I became the number one fan overnight. In my eyes, Turning can do nothing wrong.

But if I try to see it from someone else’s eyes… Maybe the length would be too long for someone else. You have to wait 200 chapters for the main couple to kiss for the first time, and at times you see characters and situations being set up.. and then you don’t see them begin to unfold for another 50 chapters!

There’s also a very, very large cast of characters, some of them named only to never properly appear… although that can also be seen as a quality! The novel feels very realistic and profound thanks to this, as allies and antagonists fade in and out of the storyline in accordance to the plot, never overstaying their welcome or standing uselessly in the background of a scene.

The supporting cast is also characterized and explored, even if they don’t stay for long, meaning that every character is inherently interesting. It’s thanks to this length in chapters and depth in characters that the novel gains in worldbuilding and intrigue with each new chapter.

Q : Please tell potential readers why they should not pass by this novel?

Teddy : Not reading Turning means passing by a novel that can and will satisfy anyone!

If you don’t like romance, then you’ll find your happiness in the worldbuilding, magic systems, and political plots.

And if you don’t like worldbuilding, magic systems, and political plots… well, think again! I thought I didn’t like those either before, but reading Turning, I found myself on the edge of my seat with every word. Everything is explained clearly and logically when it comes to intrigue, making it easy to understand and all the more interesting — but that doesn’t mean it’s lacking in emotions either! This novel masterfully meshes both plot and character building, making each moment count.

But most importantly, you’ll miss reading the developing relationship between Yuder and Kishiar, which I think is the biggest appeal of all. I’ve never rooted for a couple more in my life. Despite a past together filled with pain, they still manage to be one of the healthiest and most sincere relationships I’ve read in a long time.

So, to whoever is listening, please read Turning. You definitely won’t regret it.

Wow if you read to the end we really appreciate it! Thank you for your attention.

Please read Turning~

#manhwa #novel #turning novel #turning #yaoi bl #Boys love #bl manhwa #bl novel #터닝 #Teoning #Please read turning #Please

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randomlifex · 11 months ago

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Love isn’t a timely feeling

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ‘♡’- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Jang Hyunho x fem!reader

Plot:when the world collapses on your shoulders you’re scared you won’t get up again. Luckily there’s someone there to hold you anytime your legs shake…but at what price?

Warnings:death, bad language, sad content

Please notice:for writing purposes I had to add a random character made by me:say hi to Bora

Read the sequel here:Invisible string

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ‘♡’- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Another alarm went off, another day trying to survive, but this time you were on your own since your best friend had been executed the night before. She wasn’t a mafia, you didn’t even understand how your classmates could vote for her since you had proved them that she was a citizen, however things went as they had to go.

You looked around, as Junhee had asked the night before, everyone was surely on their way to gather in the hall, but you didn’t move. You stayed still, sat in the bathroom where you spent the night hiding, or at least that was what you had pretended to do.

You didn’t care about living no more, without your friend it didn’t make sense, so if you died you would’ve been happy. You were still alive tho.

You rested your head against the wall, closing your eyes in hope to sleep a little more and let your mind rest, but someone knocked at the door of your cabin.

You sighed, opening it just to see Hyunho’s face:

“What’s up?” you asked, in a breath of sound

“We’re supposed to gather in the hall,haven’t you read Junhee’s text?” he talked softly

“I have, I’m just ignoring it. Please, leave” you closed the door again, but Hyunho blocked it with his hand

“You’ve got no time to give up” he said

“I’ve already given up. That’s why I’m here -you tried to close the door again, but the boy didn’t let you do so- now, I’ll ask you one more time:please,leave”

“You were close to Bora, weren’t you?”

“Do we have to talk about it? -holding back your tears had never been that hard- she wa-…she’s my best friend” you explained.

Hyunho sighed, kneeling down at your height:his left hand rested on your leg while the other gently caressed your cheek:

“She wouldn’t be happy to see you like this. Now you need to go through the game for her as well”. his voice was sweet and warm. It sounded like an embrace, but it didn’t help you feeling better in any way; otherwise you burst into tears.

Hyunho lead your head to his shoulder, while your hands grabbed his shirt. Your grip was desperate, you were using so much strength that your fingers turned red:

“I can’t do this without her. I can’t. I’m sorry, I’m sorry Bora”

“Why are you apologising? -the boy caressed your head- you’re still alive, you’re still on time to get up and live for the both of you” his words came out in a whisper. Why was he comforting you like that? You had never been friends in the first place; the two of you had barely talked before that moment. Was he so sweet? Or was he just trying to make more friends than enemies?

You wondered that through the whole chat you had in the bathroom, but, at the end of the day, he was able to help you feel better and get out of there. He was so sweet and so delicate that no one could’ve rejected his help; you didn’t remember the last time you felt so safe in someone’s presence. But there you were.

Without even realising how, you found yourself sticking to Hyunho all the time. Just like Bora, he became your rock.

If something was wrong, he was there to make it better.

If you were tired, he was there to cover your shoulders.

If you were scared, he was there to hold you.

If you were hurt, he was there to heal you.

It happened once:you were exploring the centre when you ended in its darkest dungeons; you had almost got lost for a moment, but you had found your way back to the hall. However, while doing so, you stumbled and ended up cutting your hand.

Once you had gotten back to your classmates you were a mess of pain and blood, but Hyunho was the first one running to you. He lead you to the infirmary, he took care of your wound and, then, of your mind as well.

You weren’t good at that game, it was draining you more and more everyday, but Hyunho was there all the time. You wondered how that could be possible since you knew you were a burden, but he seemed to not care; otherwise he was trying his best to make things easier for you.

“Are you okay now?” he asked, moving a strand of your hair behind your ear.

After having lunch you had a few quiet hours; so he took you to the rooftop with a bunch of blankets. Your head was resting on his lap, cheeks wet as you had another one of your stupid breakdowns, but there, with him, the world seemed to go silent.

“I’m doing better. I’m sorry” you said, closing your eyes

“You don’t have to apologise” he talked, caressing your back. His hand went up and down, drawing creases on your shirt. His touch was the only thing able to relax your nerves.

Rright there, in that moment, with the breeze on your face and his presence reassuring you, you really believed that you could’ve made it through it if he would’ve stayed by your side.

“But I should. You’ve been taking care of me all the time”

“This is what friends are made for” he said, wrapping your body in a blanket

“I own you a million favours” you turned around, meeting his eyes, but he shook his head:

“You don’t own me anything -he ruffled your hair- let’s get out of here safely”

“That’s a big goal” you joked

“We can do that, don’t worry” his smile was as sweet as always, but his voice was serious. You knew he meant it for real. Your heart flattered thinking about a future with him: could’ve that been possible? Would have you been friends? Or something more? The second option sounded good…you’d loved that.

Suddenly, a bunch of random thoughts came to your mind:you could picture him in his everyday life, by your side, having dates every week, exchanging cute gifts, wearing matching clothes, kissing and…your cheeks turned as red as tomatoes.

“Is everything okay?” Hyunho blinked confused at the sight, but you covered your face with the blanket:

“Yes. Nothing’s wrong. I was just thinking”

“About what?” he giggled

“About how my life would be after this game”

“Oh…- Hyunho stayed silent for a second, then he dropped the bomb- am I in it?” he asked, uncovering your face

“Oh…hum…of course”

“In what role?” he leaned closer with an annoying smirk on his lips. He knew what he was doing. You didn’t answer as you got paralysed. Luckily the boy let it be and just laughed, leaving a fast kiss on the tip of your nose.

You didn’t know what happened there, the only thing you were sure about was that, in that moment, your heart had started beating for Jang Hyunho…and you couldn’t do anything about it. You were already far too gone, which wasn’t good, not in a survival game, not after you were still recovering from Bora’s death.

You tried to get away with it, to forget about Hyunho and see him only as a friend again, but you couldn’t, nor he could. The two of you kept looking for one another all the time, naturally.

The first thing he asked himself in the morning was if you were still alive; the last one, during the night, was if you would’ve made it through it again. The more time went by, the more players died; so everyone was automatically more and more exposed, which sent Hyunho crazy. He knew time was getting shorter, and he knew he had something big to confess you,that was why, one night, he just went for it.

“Shall we hide here?” he asked, checking the door of a forgotten room

“We always split our ways at night, are you sure about that?” you demanded

“I don’t think you’re the mafia, and surely I’m not, so I don’t mind it” he smiled.

Hyunho collected a few blankets and snacks, then he locked the entrance

“I think we’re good” he talked, sitting next to you. Your eyes met his, shining at how pretty he was in the dim light. He smiled, caressing your check before sliding his body closer. Your breath got stuck in your throat, your heart started racing in your chest:he was too close, really too close for you to hold back any kind of reaction and look like a friend.

“I need to tell you something before it’s too late” Hyunho talked, holding your hand

“W-what is it?” you pretended you didn’t know, but the only thing you were unaware of was how to react once the truth would’ve been out. You indeed liked him, but you were too scared to lose him to forget about what was happening and rush into a love story.

Hyunho giggled, scratching the back of his neck:

“We both know -he paused, then, with a sigh, he dropped the bomb- I love you yn. I can’t do anything about it. I tried, because I know that a love story is the last thing we need now, but I can’t control my feelings. You’re always in my mind, the whole time, I don’t wanna lose you…and I don’t want it to happen without telling you the truth”

You didn’t know what to answer, you froze on the spot, holding his hand for dear life. What an awful situation!

“I…don’t think we should have this conversation” you mumbled

“We should, because if anything happens I can’t let go without doing this”

“Doing what- “ you had no time to finish the sentence that Hyunho’s lips met yours.

Everything seems so strange for a second, but you were so attracted to him that you ended up going with the flow.

The boy’s hand rested on your cheek (you were now sure it was his favourite spot) as he leaned even closer. Your fingers interwove in his hair while your nostrils got filled with his scent:you didn’t know how to describe it, it was delicate and soft. So good. So calming. You had no idea how a person could affect both your body and mind in the way he did, but there you were. Love was indeed real…and was,indeed, not a timely feeling.

Hyunho was the first one letting go, but only because he was out of breath. His lips were pinky as they were now stained with your gloss:he looked so cute.

You giggled, checking the time on your phone:

“This round is almost finished…” you sighed. The boy nodded, lying down:

“Come” he said, his arms were wide open to welcome you, so you just rested your head on his shoulder

“I hope everything’s gonna be alright” you whispered

“It will be” he replied, placing a kiss on your forehead.

Hyunho was right, the next day both of you were completely fine…but things were meant to go downhill anyway.

More players got executed and even a few mafias died.

There were only three left:Jungwon, Dabum…and you.

However, you weren’t scared to die as your thoughts were focused on two things:stopping anyone who would’ve proposed to kill Hyunho; and don’t let him find out about your role. You didn’t want him to think you had been lying to him, especially if you wouldn’t have been able to protect him. Seeing him passing in such pain would’ve destroyed you.

You tried, and tried and tried…but sadly one of the worst scenarios turned into reality as Junhee and Yoonseo found out you were their rival.

The night they spilled the truth Hyunho immediately got pale. You could see he was holding back a whole breakdown:his eyes were shining, it didn’t matter if he was trying to hold his tears back, and his hands were shaking in anger.

“I can explain…” on the edge of tears, you turned to the boy who simply looked at you with a disgusted face

“I don’t wanna hear a single word coming from your fucking mouth” he replied, running away.

“Kim Junhee has voted for yn yln”

“Lee Yoonseo has voted for yn yln”

“Ji Dabum has voted for yn yln”

“Oh Jungwon has voted for yn yln”

You gave a look to your phone, then to your classmates, then you wiped your tears away and ran to Hyunho. You had thirty minutes left before dying and he was the only thing that mattered in that moment

“Hyunho!” you called him as soon as he had reached the rooftop:

“Go away! Fucking liar!” he yelled, but you ran to him, grabbing his arms

“Listen to me, please, I have no time left”

“I don’t wanna hear your bullshit” he tried to push you away, but you held onto him until the both of you fell to the ground.

The boy’s tears were wetting his shirt, while yours were pouring down your cheeks like the rain pours down from the clouds during a storm

“I’ve never lied to you Hyunho! I never did! I swear! Everything that happened between us was real!”

“You just fooled me! And you know that!” he growled, you had never seem him so desperate.

You shook your head, holding his hands:

“No,no I didn’t. Please, please Hyunho I can’t die knowing that you hate me. Please listen. I didn’t want to be a mafia, nor I tried to fool you in any way! Otherwise I’ve been doing my best to protect you! I loved you Hyunho, and I’m so happy that I could spend time with you. I’ll never forget how you made me feel and how you helped me through everything”

“Have you killed Bora?” he suddenly asked

“No! No I didn’t! I’ve never killed anyone, I swear on Bora’s soul! I would never be able to hurt my classmates, and you know that! Also…do you -you sobbed, coughing for a moment- do you remember when… when I got hurt exploring?” you demanded, Hyunho nodded

“That was the only time I lied. I-I didn’t hurt myself, I had a fight with another mafia. He was mad at me because I wasn’t helping”

“He? Who was that?” Hyunho grabbed your shoulders, dragging you closer

“I can’t tell you, but you know it. Just…just please don’t hate me…I’m begging you Hyunho”

The boy hugged you tightly. Your chin rested on his shoulder, while your hands grabbed the back of his shirt. Probably there were ten minutes left, but you didn’t have the strength to say goodbye to your loved one.

“I could never hate you yn. Never. Even if I tried -his face sank in your soft hair- I love you, I love you so much, and I know you didn’t want to do it. No one wanted” his eyes met yours while his fingers put a few strands of your hair behind your hear

“Get the other mafias out, okay?” you talked, choking on your own words. Hyunho sobbed, nodding.

“Have you… have you voted?” you then asked, caressing his face

“I haven’t yet…”

“Do it…there’s no time left. Vote for me”

The boy grabbed his phone

“Jang Hyunho has voted for yn yln”

“I’m…I’m so sorry” he cried, throwing the object away

“It’s okay. That’s how things were supposed to go. As long as you’re safe, I’m happy -you smiled through the tears, kissing his forehead- now go. Please, go”

Hyunho shook his head, holding onto you. His grip was firm on your arms. He was shaking like a leaf falling down from a tree.

“I can’t…”

“Please…”

“I can’t yn…”

“Please go, I don’t want you to see it -you gulped- I’m begging you”

“Fuck, it’s not fair -Hyunho swore, his jaw clenched- I love you. I’ll always do” he said again, placing one last kiss on your lips before running away.

You looked at him, meeting his teary eyes one last time; then, when midnight struck, your body took his last flight, becoming one with the sky.

“Yn yln has been executed. Yn yln was a mafia”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ‘♡’- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Author’s notes:EVERYBODY DON’T COME AT ME!! I’m a sucker for the desolated lovers trope or whatever this is called, but I swear:on the next story my boy will finally get an happy ending!

Hope you enjoyed this story💕

#night has come #night has come kdrama #kdrama #night has come x reader #night has come hyunho #jang hyunho #hong mingi #night has come kyung jun #go kyung jun #cha woomin x reader #cha woo min #lee jaein #kim wooseok

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emotionallychargedtowel · 11 months ago

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Since you're familiar with tokusatsu actors and their journeys into BL, what kinds of careers historically have tokusatsu actors had as they start to get more credits and mature?

Thank you for the ask! This is a great question. It’s something I’ve been curious about for a while, as you know.

I never get tired of this gif of Seto Toshiki (a Kamen Rider alum with two BLs under his belt) eating cake. (It's from Kamen Rider Ex-Aid, which he starred in with Iijima Hiroki of Our Dining Table fame.)

Oh, I should probably say at the outset that I'm talking about the suit transformation type of tokusatsu shows here. Technically the category is broader and also includes kaiju movies, but I'm focusing here on the kind of tokusatsu series in which human characters (or human-like ones) transform into masked heroes. I think that's what you had in mind, Ben, and it's the type of tokusatsu that tends to overlap with the BL world.

Another thing you'll notice is that I'm mostly going to talk about men here. Tokusatsu has been making some progress as a genre when it comes to gender equity, but it still has a long way to go. And since most of the progress that has happened, like the increase in female Riders, has been in the last few years, the actors who played those characters haven't had much of a subsequent career yet.

Now, to your question.

Unfortunately, I haven’t figured out a way to really look at this systematically. So, definitely take my conclusions with a grain of salt. (If anyone reading this knows more about this or has thoughts about how to get more/better info, I'd love to hear them.) The main source of information I have--aside from just soaking stuff up from watching tokusatsu shows and reading toku fans' tumblrs, of course--is looking at toku actors’ entries on MDL and seeing how many roles they’ve gotten, if they’re “guest,” “support,” or “main” roles, and trying to find out about the type of shows and movies they’re in.

One of the biggest weaknesses to this approach as an American viewer is that it's usually hard for me to tell what constitutes a popular or prestigious series or film even if I go to the listings for specific shows/films. I should also note that one thing that biases my “data” (to use the term loosely) is the fact that I’m more likely to look up this information about actors I like. Well, occasionally I’ll also look at info on some sample of actors out of curiosity, like a bunch of lead Ultraman actors’ subsequent careers or something like that. But it's usually more random.

A little background. As you're aware, tokusatsu roles often go to younger actors who don't have much previous experience. They tend to function both as a way of getting a foothold in the industry (building a resume, starting a fanbase, etc.) and as a way of learning on the job. Part of the reason they work so well in this regard is that they have long seasons. Ultraman seasons are typically around 25 episodes long, which is pretty long compared to many shows in Japan, but Kamen Rider and Super Sentai seasons are usually around 50 episodes long. This means two things: a toku part gets you a lot more of the aforementioned work experience than you'd get in other genres, and it provides a solid year of consistent work with additional work to follow (particularly hard to come by in Japan's entertainment industry, from what I understand). The additional work is substantial, too. There are typically post-series TV movies and touring live shows and there are often guest spots on other series in your franchise.

When it comes to landing other roles, as in other types of media, it makes a big difference what type of role you had. This is stating the obvious, I know, but there are some specific ways this works with tokusatsu series, and it relates to who ends up in BLs and in what capacity. So, all of the big three tokusatsu franchises are pretty ensemble-based but they still have distinct leads and some degree of a hierarchy of roles. Ultraman has the strongest leads, Kamen Rider has lead/title Riders and secondary (and often tertiary) Riders, and Super Sentai shows are especially ensemble-y (the word sentai basically means "squad," after all) but they always have some kind of group leader.

When I look up subsequent work by tokusatsu actors who had sizable roles in their toku series--lead roles, or other parts that are what MDL would call "main" roles--what I see most often is a lot of supporting and guest roles in a variety of TV shows and some films. You can usually find a smattering of lead roles as well, but if you look closely they may turn out to be smaller productions (but not always). When it comes to the number/frequency of credits, there's a lot of variation but an average case would be 2-3 such credits per year. Like I mentioned above, it's hard for me to tell how desirable/prestigious/well-paying those guest and supporting roles are. But they don't usually seem to be scraping the bottom of the barrel or anything. So, yeah. Lots of these actors have different paths, but this is what I see most frequently.

Given how challenging it is to make a career out of acting in Japan, this is nothing to sneeze at. Despite its relative influence, the Japanese entertainment industry is still comparatively small, and there are only so many opportunities. In that context, regularly getting guest and supporting gigs constitutes a pretty uncommon level of success.

Could these folks support themselves on this amount of work? I often see just a few credits per year, so maybe not. But when I like one of these actors enough to follow them on socials, it usually seems like they are supplementing those parts with other stuff like stage plays, toku fan appearances, modeling gigs, or other types of performance including music. Even with these different sources of income, some probably still can't live on their entertainment industry pay alone. But it appears that some can.

So that's the most common thing. One less common outcome is leaning really hard into being a tokusatsu actor for life. It's not typical to get significant roles in multiple toku shows, but it does happen. And some actors manage to play the same character in a lot of post-series movies, miniseries, etc. stretching out for years after their actual series. For example, Tsuruno Takeshi, who played Ultraman Dyna's human host Shin Asuka, has been in ten different Ultraman things including his main series, a short series, a lot of TV movies, and a special. Dyna aired in 1997, and his last appearance as Asuka was fairly recent, in 2016. That's almost a 20-year span. Yet Tsuruno has never had a non-Ultraman main character part. (Though this is partly because he seems to have focused more on his music career and related variety show type things post-Dyna.) There are even some actors who are tokusatsu superfans whose whole career plan is centered on the genre from the get-go.

For those who are looking to branch out, there are a lot of trajectories. So I'll try to talk about some of them through a few examples.

Takeda Kouhei

You probably knew I was going to bring him up. On Kamen Rider Kiva, Takeda's character was important but not the lead (he played the main character's father in the 1980s, in a timeline that ran parallel to the present day one). That was in 2008, when he was 22. Nine years later, in 2017, he was in Kamen Rider Build, in which he was the "tertiary" Rider. This character was a potato farmer-turned-antihero. As tertiary Riders go, he was pretty popular. But Takeda seemed to be mostly hovering at a certain level at that point. Then Old Fashion Cupcake happened. It's significant that he went from playing supporting characters (albeit important ones) to a lead character in OFC. It's also helpful that OFC came out at a point when the prestige of BLs was on the rise. It seems like Takeda has had more consistent and larger parts since then. The difference isn't night and day or anything, but it's observable.

If you look at Takeda's Build costars, Inukai Atsuhiro and Akaso Eiji, here’s what you'll find. Akaso has a similar trajectory to Takeda's only somewhat steeper. His role on Build (the secondary Rider) was a bit bigger, he seemed to get slightly bigger roles overall after Build, and Cherry Magic gave him a significant boost from there. Inukai had a bigger upswing early on followed by slower growth that still had him outstripping both Akaso and Takeda. From what I can tell, his “data” more closely resembles that of Yamada Yuki, who I’ll talk about in a second, though they have different niches.

Suda Masaki

Suda Masaki was only 16 when he played the main rider in Kamen Rider W in 2009, which is unusually young. (W has a unique premise where two different people inhabit the same Rider, so Suda played a lead rider but so did his costar Kiriyama Renn.) From what I can tell, he seems to have had a pretty organic path to larger and larger roles while varying genres and styles quite a bit. At this point he's definitely a very respected actor. (One interesting bit of trivia: Hagiwara Riku has said Suda is his biggest acting role model.) He's won two Japan Academy Film Prizes and been nominated three more times. I don't know of a more successful ex-tokusatsu lead. Actually, I looked him up for this post to fill in some details and found out for the first time that he also has a pretty successful career as a jpop musician. It's almost annoying that he's that talented in yet another area.

I don't see any indication that Suda has ever played a queer character, though he has definitely done some pretty bromantic stuff. He did kiss a man once in a drama series, but it was for plot reasons and was 100% played for laughs in a gross way. He also played a gender nonconforming character in the 2014 live action version of Princess Jellyfish. (Another bit of trivia: when another live action adaptation of Princess Jellyfish was released in 2018, the same character was played by another former lead Rider, Seto Koji from Kiva.) I wouldn't put it past Suda to play a queer character, if it was for a highbrow movie or something analogous to what Nishijima Hidetoshi has done in What Did You Eat Yesterday?, but I'm also not holding my breath.

Yamada Yuki

A less extreme case. Yamada was on Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger. He was the blue member of the team, a soldier-turned-pirate. It may have helped Yamada along later on that Gokaiger is an especially popular Sentai series. Post-Gokaiger, Yamada didn't have any sort of big breakout role that I can find. It just seems like fairly soon after Gokaiger, he started having significant roles in TV dramas and has pretty much continued from there, with some upward momentum but no huge changes. When he was in a drama with Akaso Eiji recently, his part was first billed and a smidge bigger. Yamada's trend line seemed to have a biggish upward swing early and then just a slight slope from there. But I just saw him in something different: he plays the younger member of the minesweeper crew in Godzilla Minus One. I wonder if that will mark any sort of shift for him.

Yamada hasn't played any queer characters as far as I can tell. His Sentai role was shippy as hell, though. It's a tradition among Sentai shows that subtext-level queer ships happen between the red and blue team members, and that's exactly what happened in Gokaiger. Sometimes the subtext pretty much became text. If magazine images from that time are any indication, their relationship seems to have been a promotional angle for the show. There's even one where they seem to be in some kind of high school AU that looks like it's straight out of a BL.

what about women?

I tried looking up a few women I know from tokusatsu roles while I was looking up these and other dudes. Some of them were still in the business, at least. Some were getting the same trickle of guest and supporting parts a lot of men do after a tokusatsu show. A few had a slightly bigger trickle. But many of them seemed to have disappeared from the public eye entirely. Not only are women underrepresented in tokusatsu, and not only are their roles often relatively small and two-dimensional, but it doesn't seem like they get even a slight career boost after these roles.

It's possible this will change for some of the actors who got bigger, more interesting toku roles in recent years. Here's hoping!

The changing relationship between tokusatsu and BL

The relationship between tokusatsu and BL has been changing as BL gains more prestige, like I alluded to when I talked about Takeda Kouhei. There was a time when they seemed to be pretty analogous in terms of how hard it was to get a role and how effective they were as rungs on a career ladder. If you went from being a tokusatsu side character to a BL lead (like Takeda), that was a step up, but only because you were shifting from a supporting spot to a lead one. Tokusatsu leads usually didn't usually do BL or, when they did, only played straight supporting roles. I think it was seen as a lateral move. But now, BL is becoming a very established next step after tokusatsu. It's like BL has moved up in status so that the consensus is that it's above tokusatsu on the ladder, but just by a little bit. It's also kind of an organic transition since we're seeing more queer ships in tokusatsu that, while they mostly happen on a subtext level, are close to being canon (and in some cases, arguably already are). It occurred to me while I was writing this that there's also another type of role that is in a similar zone of accessibility and prestige to both tokusatsu and BL. It's a franchise, not a genre, but with so many movies and such huge casts it almost functions like a genre for the purpose of this discussion. I'm talking about the High&Low movies. If you're a fan of tokusatsu or BL, you'll see actors you know in every High&Low movie and if you're a fan of both, you'll see tons.

Case in point: Here's our ol’ pal Yamada Yuki. He's in quite a few High&Low installments. If only he’d do a BL and complete the trifecta! The only person I know of offhand who’s done a tokusatsu show, a BL, and a High&Low role is Takeda. I bet there are others, though.

the new (?) prestige tokusatsu

There's another piece to this I should probably point out as well. In recent years there have been some more high-budget, prestigious takes on existing tokusatsu properties. First, Anno Hideaki, who's best known for the Evangelion anime series/films, put out three live action features that are new, well-financed takes on three big tokusatsu properties: Shin Godzilla, Shin Ultraman, and Shin Kamen Rider.

Last year there was also a Kamen Rider series geared toward adults that had higher-than-usual production values called Kamen Rider Black Sun. It did that “you can tell our show is for adults because it's all gritty and grimdark" thing, which I'm not a fan of. But it definitely had its points.

Really distinguished actors starred in both the Shin movies and Black Sun, including Nishijima Hidetoshi, who's about as distinguished as it gets. Nishijima was in both Shin Ultraman (in an important supporting role) and Black Sun (as a co-protagonist--and he's the biggest highlight of the series). So these are examples of toku media that are too prestigious to be a springboard into the industry for most actors.

This seems to be a new phenomenon, though I could be wrong about that. I don’t expect the trend will continue at this pace (after all, so much of it is attributable to Anno alone and I don't think he'll continue down this path indefinitely), but I bet some other shows/movies in this vein will come out sooner or later.

Here’s Nishijima doing a henshin sequence. He does these moves with such commitment. Is there anything he can't do?

before tokusatsu

As I was writing this, it got me thinking about what actors do before their tokusatsu roles as well as after. It's not uncommon for toku roles to be someone's debut, but that's not really the norm. Even when it is, most of those actors were doing something in the realm of performing or modeling beforehand. I don't usually look at this sort of information as much as I do later roles when I'm investigating toku actors I like. So I looked up some people to try to get a sense of where the actors tend to have done before their toku parts.

There's one starting point that a whole bunch of tokusatsu leads share: winning the Junon Super Boy Contest. When I first saw references to it, I thought, OK, this is some kind of national talent contest. I guess there are probably lots of them. But when I looked for others, I didn't see anything come up. Maybe I'm just not looking in the right places or using the right search terms. But I think maybe this contest might be pretty unique in Japan.

It's run by a magazine called Junon and, well, if I describe how it works it's going to sound really familiar to you and anyone else who's seen Utsukushii Kare, because it's pretty much exactly the contest Kiyoi participates in. Like, if it's not what Nagira Yuu was thinking of when she wrote that part of the UK novel, I'll eat my shoe.

A ton of tokusatsu leads won, placed in, or made it to the finals of that contest. The Tokupedia fan wiki even has its own page dedicated to the contest with links to various winners' toku characters. The majority of Junon Super Boy contestants who ended up in a toku series went to Kamen Rider, but there are some Sentai dudes as well and at least one Ultraman lead.

So I guess if Kiyoi had won that contest, he probably would have ended up on Kamen Rider or something. Weird.

Inukai Atsuhiro and Iijima Hiroki both won that contest. Those are the only two Junon Boys (that's what people call the contest winners) who became tokusatsu actors and were on a BL that I know of right off the top of my head. But it seems likely that there are other toku-and-BL or just BL actors who won, placed, or made it to the finals of this contest.

Other dudes who ended up on tokusatsu shows started out in other ways. Some were simply signed to agencies as actors. There's a fair number of them who were in idol groups. (Though when an idol/ex-idol is looking for a gig as a transition into acting, BLs seem to be a more popular choice.) Some mostly did modeling prior to their toku series. Some already had quite a few acting credits, though usually not very big ones. Although he's a Junon Super Boy winner, Inukai had eight other acting credits before Kamen Rider. Takeda had the same number, and he started young--his first credit is for a TV show that came out when he was 10 (though it took another six years to get a second).

I also looked up some women who've had prominent roles in tokusatsu shows, including more recent ones. The most frequent things I found when I looked for information on their pre-toku careers were that they had been models or idols (or both). It's also not uncommon for women in toku roles to be former or present gravure models--basically models who pose in bikinis or comparably revealing outfits.

The coolest thing I found was that Imoto Ayaka, who played Igarashi Sakura/Kamen Rider Jeanne, was an award-winning ballet dancer. Which is not only incredibly cool but makes a lot of sense in terms of preparation for a tokusatsu hero role.

I mean, just check out this henshin.

Well, this has gotten ridiculously long. Sorry about that. I may have gotten a little carried away. But thanks again for the question.

And now, I have something to write for @wen-kexing-apologist...

#tokusatsu to BL pipeline #tokusatsu #takeda kouhei #yamada yuki #suda masaki #junon super boy contest #kamen rider #super sentai #kamen rider kiva #kaizoku sentai gokaiger #kamen rider w #nishijima hidetoshi

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imaexplodenow · 3 months ago

Text

⚠️VERY LONG PARAGRAPHS UP AHEAD, IM SRS 😭 ⚠️

Okay finally! Been a while, but

Helloooo EKH Tumblr! It’s about time I share my AUs I have made! The reason it took a while was cuz the WiFi on all my devices went out for a few days, and I woulda drawn on my phone, but I just didn’t feel that motivation

…..and I made a new AU a few days ago so I was postponing this to draw on the new AU and see if it was one of my,, AUs I’d stick w/

Heads up before u start reading/looking at it!

-There’s a good about of.. chest…. Like…shirtless chest 😓

-So,, if you don’t know me, Sam is,, my favorite character, and so there’s…..a lot of “off character derailment” especially with ‘em. I still love love lloveeee (/p) the anxious cannon Sam, but these changes r for story telling purposes (you’ll see what I mean)

-There’s a GOOD chance that I will make ones in the future, so for now, these r the 6 I HIGHLY focus on as I love AUs and making them

-I have posted most of these on Twt, so if you’ve seen these before, just know I’m sharing these w/ Tumblr, and then I’ll share more on the new AU on Twt after this (u can ask for my @ if you’d like to follow me for more EKH art, as I’ll probably post there more often)

Anyways! Onto the AU sharing and somewhat story telling!

In chronological order of when they were made/discovered:

1st: Virus AU (BL**D/G*RE WARNING)

This was when I was in a BIG horror mood, so it’s basically an apocalyptic x monster AU

Basically, if anyone breathed in the air after a radiation accident, chances are you’d be infected and become a part of the undead,, or a werewolf

First victim of the 4 in this AU: Steven. Fought off a zombie and it took off his mask while in battle, leading to zombie wounds and inhaling the surrounding air killing him off and bringing him back a few days later as a part of the zombie hoard that was rapidly increasing.

Second victim of the 3: Sam. The 3 were fighting off the Steven zombie, and just like Steven and what he was fighting off, the mask came off, but no zombie injuries were present on Sam by the time his passing came. A few more days pass, and he comes back looking.. fine. A little pale, and colorful eyes, but not a zombie at least. Spends a few more days w/ the two that haven’t died, and after feeling extremely weak and a little peeved, takes a bite out of a stranger’s neck. The other two think it’s best to exile him off to a graveyard, to prevent them from getting their necks from getting bitten. Meanwhile, while nights go past after spending time to himself in his new graveyard home, the other two plot to kill him off. It’s decided Kevin should be the one to put a steak in Sam’s slowly beating heart, but when that happens, things go wrong. Despite Sam hating this new life, being killed by a close friend of his was shocking to see, and quickly reacting by fighting back. After some back and forth fighting, Sam accidentally launches himself into a fragile brick wall, causing one brick to fall directly on his head, knocking him out. After awakening to seeing Kevin stitching his injury and running away from guilt, things are no longer the same.

The two of them go to pay a visit to their old friend that’s in the graveyard, particularly because Kevin still cares for Sam and the guilt was eating him alive. They go into the graveyard, and see the place Sam resided in was..oddly more elegant looking than the last visit. Candles, a red carpet…a throne? The two cautiously enter calling out his name. In the blink of an eye, they’re both roped up and on their knees. After a few seconds of panicking and looking around, a sound of sipping was heard from the throne, with their friend looking…different. Still pale, still the red eyes, but more laid back and dressed up. Not like him at all, and not in a good way either, as he emerges from the shadows with a sky look on him. Treating the other two like a frenemy, bickering back and forth with the other two, and after some bickering, threatens to take a bite out of Kevin’s neck. Ofc it’s not something either Kevin or Billy wants, and luckily Kevin’s neck is spared, however, fate wasn’t in Billy’s hands; he shouts at this new Sam, the usual Billy talk, and leads to Sam being fed up. But he can’t bite his “tough love” friend’s neck, no no. There’s other plans for his friend Billy.

Third victim of the 2: Billy. Mask pulled down by this Vampire Sam, and a slight beating, causing Billy to forcefully inhale the air. Sam lets the two go, so they quickly get up and get out of this new home of Sam. They go back to the house all 4 used to live in before all this. They worry. Both of them. None of them want to die or die and then become a violent undead being like their friend. A few more days pass by, and Billy is fine? Maybe the air is fine? No. Night strikes, the moon is out. His body starts to grow and so does the pain, the hair, and the fangs. Mind starts to grow more violent as he cries for help from Kevin. He sees a hole in the wall in the area Billy was in. A huuggeee hole. Kevin would have gone searching, but with all sorts of zombies roaming, boarding up the hole was top priority and he’d have to go looking in the daytime. As nighttime passes, Kevin finishes covering the hole up and sleeps for the night, with late morning time bringing decently loud noises. Morning time comes and Kevin wakes up to hear pained grunts coming from the front door. Cautiously opening the door, he doesn’t see a zombie, he sees Billy, covered in a little bit of blood, dirt, tears in shirt and pants, and just overall messy appeal. It shocks and disgusts Kevin a little bit, but he can’t keep Billy out, as he’s begging to be let back in, saying it’s not safe for him to be outside and how he thinks he ate one or two animals. Kevin lets him in but decides to not discuss what happened, as they both put obvious inferences together. But time after the past hectic days haven’t been easy. Pretty hard actually.

Somehow the werewolf and vampire still chat with each other. The werewolf doesn’t want to keep up with the vampire, but it seems the vampire has learned how to enter the minds of those who sleep, and some more magical abilities. Billy doesn’t sleep as often now, doesn’t go out to get a proper werewolf diet, so both of those factors cause him to stay in a violent mood, especially since he lives with someone he doesn’t have too strong of a connection with. Of course life itself now sucks for him, but being a 12 ft tired and hungry wolf wasn’t on his or Kevin’s bucket list. It’s hard to keep care of the new Billy, but Kevin manages. He goes out so often to get raw meat, fresh water from the remaining water bottles in abandoned stores, keeps calm around Billy as to not escalate anything. Unfortunately, with the other two on the loose wrecking havoc on the public, things can’t always go according to plan.

One day, while Kevin was out getting stuff for Billy, things get messy fast. Billy tries to sleep during the day, since vampires are usually nocturnal, but that was unfortunate timing, as when he wakes up, he’s back at the home of his vampire “friend”. It’s not an illusion either, he’s actually physically there to, as well as…Steven, chained up but right next to the throne. There’s been some improvements to the place, but none to the vampire. If anything he’s gotten worse, somewhat bragging how great it’s been w/o Billy being the one in control. With each sentence Sam was spewing out, it got the werewolf closer and closer to try and maul him to shut him up. Unfortunately, they’re both equal in power, but when it comes to planning an attack, Sam has become better at that with these new found powers; at the perfect time as Billy is really close, he falls under a hypnotic spell, looking straight into Sam’s eyes. Loosening up, not wanting to maul him into pieces, and listening to what Sam’s saying.

Last victim: Kevin. He comes home to the werewolf not being around, getting a little worried, but there’s not much he can do without any visual hints as to where he might have went. So he carries on with his chores, putting away the wolf food and his own, cleans up the place. Of course that’s when Billy returns, of course it is, when he’s cleaning. He informs Billy there’s a restock in the fridge and doesn’t see there’s something wrong with him until Billy states he doesn’t want that. Kevin turns around to see Billy ominously standing at the front door, nothing but red in his eyes, literally. Full glowing red eyes. Getting a little concerned now, Kevin tries to avoid the topic of meats there is to snack on. It doesn’t work, Billy isn’t listening and inches closer to Kevin, treating him like…well…a treat. Next thing you know, Billy grabs one of his legs, making some quick remark of Margaret, sounding something more like what Sam would say, and rips it off without hesitation. A pained scream by Kevin as his lays on the ground, panicking as thoughts rush through his mind. One thought was to call 911, so with the remaining strength he has, he crawls towards his phone and dials 911 (or of course, what’s left of it). As soon as he starts reporting what’s going on, Billy, who’s still in the trance, goes in for the other leg, for another part of him to snack on and to try and shut him up. That only alerts the operator on the other side more, as they say they’ll track Kevin’s location and send an ambulance ASAP. The phone call ends, and so does Billy’s other little snack, but the hypnosis wears off just before he can finish the second leg, and it takes a second for Billy to get a grasp on reality again. He looks behind him, and to his shock and horror, there’s a dying and leg less Kevin, breathing at a rapid pace and heavily, trying to keep his eyes from closing, but with the most amount of emotions he’s ever shown. In this moment, this is the most regret Billy has ever felt and shown.

An ambulance arrives a few minutes later, with Kevin just on the brink of death. They’re able to bring him into the ambulance, but unable to find what or who might have caused such a bloody mess. As they drive away to hopefully help Kevin stay alive, one of the bedroom doors open as Billy peeks out into the empty house. He hated it. The silence, the idea of being by himself, and that he actually committed an act of murder. What had he done? No…what did Sam make him do? Everyone else was dead or close to being dead. Everyone except him. And it hurt. But he couldn’t show that, of course he couldn’t. If he showed a sign of weakness, he’d only feel worse, and that wasn’t who he was. He had to keep pushing through these new conditions.

Something Kevin tried, but failed at doing. Trying to distract himself, Billy tries watching TV, because what else was there left to do to keep himself occupied? Unfortunately, hours later, it gets interrupted. Billy almost throws a “werewolf fit” bout it, but he couldn’t. His eyes were averted to someone else. At first he couldn’t recognize him, but that was Kevin. A ghostly apparition form of Kevin. This wasn’t a sick trick either, he didn’t make it. Literally floating, hair and body, he now had pure white eyes, wore a hospital outfit, but was still himself. He was lucky enough to have not become a violent or vengeful spirit, it was just him, but seemingly willing to put more effort into helping those who needed it despite the sarcastic tone he still had.

And that’s where the story caps off. This is how those 4 are now and their new life.

TLDR: Steven’s a mindless servant zombie to the Vampire Sam, who’s completely changed his attitude and view towards everything, behaving more like a traditional vampire. Billy is a werewolf who’s constantly fighting with the werewolf urges on a daily basis and against Sam’s wishes. Kevin is a phantom who’s the neutral-good towards anyone.

But now we can move onto a more silly AU! …ofc it still has angst but no bl0od this time!

2nd: Regretevator AU

Starts out relatively normal! Just the 4 of them going on a camping trip! …okay except for the rumors that there’s alien kidnappings, experimentation, and those who enter don’t come back…the same at least. Ofc Sam and Billy had a little disagreement and ofc it ended up with Billy’s vote mattering, so they go to the supposedly dangerous camp! And of course one there’s an alien kidnapping! The 4 start booking it, leaving most of their camping supplies there, but one of them don’t make it out in time. Billy, Steven, and Kevin make it to a safe area, but…hey where’d Sam go? …oh shit he’s getting abducted. The other three go to try and pull him out of the beam, but to no avail. The beam was stronger than the three of them combined, leading to Sam going into the UFO. Who knows what’s gonna happen to him? Well…he does. Kind of. He got to witness it all, but of course, that damn green cat was the cause of his new life. Xe put Sam into some kind of sleep, but with a kind of drug that didn’t look like any he could recall before passing out. But he wouldn’t be able to recall any of that anymore.

The other three, still in the camp waiting for him to come back, continuing their camping trip in silence. An hour passes and the UFO is back! It lands close by to them, and out comes two figures. One is the green cat, and xe’s holding something that looks human. It has yellow skin…a pink shirt……more accessories…..what the hell this isn’t the human xe kidnapped? Except yes it is. There’s the brown tank top underneath that pink shirt. There’s the shaggy and goatee, even if it looks a bit different. And his voice… despite it being extremely glitchy and compressed, it sounds like him. Turns out the cat just used something xe found at an apartment and tested it on Sam. Well…okay sure he looks different but, it’s still Sam!

The other three keep asking him things about what happened, if he’s okay, the typical. Except, he can’t recall. He’s a little off put by these faces. Who are these 3 guys and how do they know him? He doesn’t even know himself, he just feels, both overwhelmed and…silly? Well if the three talk it out with the green cat maybe they can get it to revert Sam back to norm- oh. The cat’s just left them behind. Great. Stuck with a curious “Sam” and three confused and concerned guys. Best thing they all can do is just go back to where they’re all living.

Over the last few months this…thing…resembles Sam less and less. He knew Kevin was a germaphobe, so why is he fine w/ being sick all the time and acting like it’s not a big deal? He used to keep Billy in check with his money, but now he’s the one spending all his money on decorations and internet related stuff, so how’s that fair? He used to get paranoid when Steven accidentally made a loud noise or spoke loudly, so why is he the loudest one out of the bunch? Especially when playing his games? It’s like he was the total opposite of what he’s supposed to be… He doesn’t even answer to Sam anymore, he has this weird name that isn’t even a name! He prefers to be called S4G3 because “1t c00l3r th4n d1s “S4M” n@m3”. He also has very colorful outfits, and it kind of hurts to look at.

So of course one day Billy grows extremely tired of this and goes to take matters into his in his own hands. He would have dragged Kevin with him, but for some reason he liked Kevin, despite Kevin not like him back. Doesn’t make sense either seeing how “S4G3” likes to spend time with Steven more. So Billy drags Steven along with him instead and leaves Kevin to deal with S4G3. Billy’s plan is to go back to the camp and be as stubborn as possible to get that green alien cat to change S4G3 back onto Sam and have Steven as backup.

Luckily first step of the plan worked. …can’t say that about the rest of the plan, because the green alien has something the other two don’t: an army and weapons. So wouldn’t you know it, they’re also on the chopping block for getting the “gnarpian” treatment. Except instead of whatever was used to create Sam into S4G3, Billy gets this…splinter? Oh and his legs cut off. And unfortunately, Steven watches the majority of that, but of course, there can’t be any witnesses, just experiment vessels. Steven gets a different treatment though, he just gets to listen to music… huh, odd. Hopefully this doesn’t alter his brain in anyway.

Well, another few hours go past, and Kevin is still not enjoying S4G3 company. So when he heard a knock at the door, he was relieved to answer it and ignore S4G3 for a minute or two. Except it was the green cat at the door and tossed the other two back into the apartment, threatening to not bother xe again or else he’d be next and it would be the worst experiment out of the 4 of them. So of course that puts enough fear into Kevin to not want to even talk to xem. …which is unfortunate because now instead of Billy and Steven returning, xe gave him a weird stylized wooden mannequin and Steven but with flashier clothes. …oh. They were also used for experiments. And they also behaved like S4G3 when he first came into existence. Confused and not like themselves. Steven wasn’t as bad, just extra and his personality revolved more around his music gig. Billy though? He’s barely stubborn anymore, he’s more compassionate and caring than rude. He’s also now a hard worker, even of said work is all about wood. That wouldn’t be too much of a problem if the equipment he used was so loud all the time and he wasn’t so confused and anxious majority of the time he interacted with the others.

Great. Something more bothersome for Kevin to suck up and deal with for who knows how long.

TLDR: Sam became Infected ripoff, Billy became Mark ripoff, Steven became a Brock ripoff (even though they’re both music lovers, not much there was changed), and Kevin is…Kevin. (This Kevin isn’t 20 years later in a bad way Kevin, more of Inadvertent Hero Kevin)

Okay! Now back to our regularly scheduled angst!

3rd: Hacker AU

Ever wondered how you could access the outside barriers on the EKH RP game, or wondered what’s the other houses like, but they’re just beyond your reach? Yeah, so did this Sam…in a way.

The day of the house fire. It starts like normal. Billy sticking gum in Kevin’s hair at school, Kevin telling on Him, Billy dragging Sam along to try and get aid to Egg Kevin’s House. The little kid Sam this time though, was getting deja vu, like he’s done this before… but regardless, he declines. Of course he does. He can’t damage his friend’s house! And there it goes. Up in flames. With a woman screaming from inside it. And there they both go, running from it. 20 years later happens. At the burnt house of his old friend’s. To make a video with his two other friends. They go in and out of the house, night after night, and it still feels all too familiar. But, it’s just gotta be that feeling you get…and don’t listen to. They come across Kevin…the basement gets lit on fire. The two of thEm escape, and Kevin is spared. Once they start running, everything goes black.

The day of the house fire. It starts like normaL. Billy sticking gum in Kevin’s hair at school, Kevin telling on him, Billy dragging Sam along to try and get aid to Egg Kevin’s House. Hasn’t she done this before? Who knows. She begrudgingly helps Billy to Egg Kevin’s House. And there it goes. Up in flames. With a woman screaming from inside it. And there they both go, running from it. 20 years later happens. At the burnt house of her old friend’s. To make a video with his two other friends. They go in and out of the house, night after night, and…again, this feels all too recognizable. She could have sworn she’s done this before…maybe it was just a segment of that nightmare she had and just now remembering. …so why did she see herself as a guy? Dreams can be weird. They come across Kevin…the basement gets lit on fire. The two of them escape, and Kevin is…killed. Once they start running, everything goes bLack.

The day of the house fire. It starts…with Sam trying tO backtrack. He really doesn’t want to be here, especially with Billy in his cranky kid mood. But it’s hard to. Why can’t he go back where he came from? He keeps pushing against the invisible force., all while Billy is calling out to Sam that he looks silly and not in a good way. Sam keeps pushing and pushing and pushing, he so desperately doesn’t want anything bad to happen to any of them. After some more pushing, he finally is allowed out of Kevin’s house area…and into a black void? Where’d he go? Where were the other houses? Turns out the idea he had was more scary than actual being called a coward by his friend Billy. …Billy wasn’t around either. Where-

The panicking kicks into high gear once he spots a group of infamous figures, dubbed hackers. Trouble making, rumor spreading creature criminals that ranged from not-so-chaoTic, like John Doe to “should be killed for their crimes”, like 1x1x1x1. And speaking of 1x1x1x1, right behind the child Sam was said hacker, who already knew who they were. They both had a chat, Sam scared of what was going on, like, extremely scared.. he wanted his…parents? …he doesn’t recall having those, let alone their names. It then turned into a kind of vent session after JoHn told 1x1x1x1 to calm themselves and let the child speak their mind. So after the vent session 1x1x1x1 went off the walls a bit and told them none of that was real. John couldn’t zip them up on time, so that lead the little child to be shocked and confused. That’s when the entirety of life was spilled to the child Sam. First was showing they only had four total “models”: Male & FemalE child and adult “models”. After altering the little male Sam child into their adult “model” so they could get a better understanding of all of this, 1x1x1x1 lead them to the gender option screen, and let Sam at it. He hesitates to select the female, but when she selects it, things start to click; she wasn’t in control of anything. Back and forth, male - female -male -female, they couldn’t believe even simple things weren’t up to them. Finally fed up with their identity crisis, just slammed their fist against both choices, and something felt different at that point, but it didn’t matter. Nothing at that point didn’t matter. 1x1x1x1 still had more to spill though. Billy, Steven, Kevin, the nurse, all of those people, none of them were real. Whereas Sam could think multiple things, it was said they all “went with the flow” with whateveR came out Sam’s mouth. Sam could sometimes move wherever they wanted, the others had a path. The more information Sam learnt, the more they hated everything and everyone around them, growing distant from the character they were made out to bE.

With all of that learned, 1x1x1x1 finally put them to a test. They sent them to Night 1, when the three of them were standing outside the house. The other two discussing about making a video, and Sam just standing there, looking upset in an angered type of way. This lead to the other two asking what was the matter with Sam, with nothing being said. So of course, it was taken as the “…” option, which lead to Sam snapping in a violent way. The world around them started to crumble while they seemingly spewing nonsense, saying how “they don’t actually care” and “you guys aren’t real”. The area around the three of them getting worse and worse, opening up to static and void, even opening Kevin’s house showing how confused he is. It’s getting harder and harder to balance on the broken streets, grass, overall land beneath the other 3. Billy starts hoping around on different platforms, trying to reach Sam and trying to “reason” with them. He screwed up with one question when he reaches Sam and states “Try and calm down. This isn’t like you at all, what’s gotten into you?” Sam then stops dwelling for that moment, turns to look at Billy, with the most angered face they have ever put on, and goes on to tell him that they finally realize that everyone and everything around them was the problem, and they’re finally realizing it. But of course, Billy has to go on and rub salt into the wound, by stating that right now, thanks to Sam, they’re causing most of the issue, which, while true, isn’t what they needed, leading to their hands sparking, resembling the colors of 1x1x1x1 as if their influence finally rubbed onto Sam themself. Nothing this, Sam goes in for a brutal beating to their so-called friend, and causes him to go completely red, literally. He starts glitching out, unable to speak, turning the color red, until he finally falls to the ground like a ragdoll. But oh no, they can’t just stop at Billy. In a fit of rage, they start to approach the other two who are just staring in horror. The next one to get “killed off” is Steven while Kevin makes a run for it. Or, at least he tries to. The terrain around him is hard to navigate, but just as Steven’s being finished off, Sam is finishing him off, they catch sight of Kevin and teleport right in front of him, saying how they’ll feel little remorse for erasing Kevin, but not enough to not do it. And just before erasing Kevin, he’s able to ask why and how. Sam swiftly explains how they don’t like their emotions being toyed with. Not anymore at least.

They’re all glitched out corpses now. There’s still more to erase to, but not before having another chat w/ 1x1x1x1, being encouraged to keep it up, because of how much more freeing it is. Except, unfortunately, it can only be done in the “world” of Egg Kevin’s House, because you’d never see a Sam outside that game, ever. But hey, at least they can do whatever they want in that world, toy w/ the other 3, and dress differently instead of the same brown attire (in which the outfit was gifted by John Doe). It didn’t look like much, but that was because it was an older outfit. Still, the newly named 1nS4Mity is a free roaming semi-hacker in their world of Egg Kevin’s House.

TLDR: This is just a 4th wall breaker type of AU, but w/ angst and hackers.

Okay! Last 3! I have been typing the ones above for….about 6 hours now. I’m dead serious 😭 But luckily! These next ones don’t have too much of a story to them (yet(?)), so this should be quick and easy!

4th: 7 Deadly Sins

Honestly I just did this one for two reasons: 1, I like the idea of 7 deadly sins. It can be fun to mess w/ imo. 2, it had been a while since I made an AU, so my mind just came up w/ this idea

Basically, the more a person acts like their ideal sins, the more likely they are to become said sin. In order:

Kevin becomes Wrath after loathing about his mother’s death in his house

Billy becomes Greed after making clickbait video after clickbait video and it actually working and gaining him some revenue

Soon after, Steven, being Pride. He believes that w/o his help, Billy’s ideas would be absolutely garbage.

And lastly, Sam, becoming Sloth. A mix of depression and not needing to do much while the others are doing what they do as sinful entities, so he just decides to sleep in, day after day after day after day..and yeah.

5th: {No real AU name for this}

Soooo this is a goofy one, and I mean, goofy. It’s a crossover of my two favorite Roblox games w/ a dash of their worst endings, this being Warmonger for EKH, and Monster for Overnight (iirc). (If you haven’t watched/played Overnight, highly recommended as there’s spoilers for this game in this AU)

Basically a little after the Warmonger ending, it clicks w/ Sam that this whole “killing people off hobby” is oddly therapeutic, and if Billy isn’t around to judge him, then he could do whatever he wanted, even breaking the law! So he basically becomes this gleeful ball of madness, killing anyone and everyone off in creative ways, while also having this demon as a sort of sidekick (it’s taken the role watching out for Sam (or Warmonger as he prefers) in case he ends up in a prison or almost dead).

6th and most recent one: Pirates AU

It should be obvious what this is about. Now since it’s new, I can’t share a shortened version of the story as I don’t fully have one, but I can share the fact that Billy is the captain of his crew, with Sam being second captain, Steven being the one to help Billy get his crew, and Kevin ………………..

There’s also the side characters in this actually!

The news reporter still being that, just old timey, Nurse Adam’s being a siren now, and the fire fighter being a ghost pirate captain. :D

Oh also Billy prefers others to be called Captain Billy for his crew, and William for strangers/enemies, Sam is Samuel and hates the shortened version of his name, Steven being Stephen, and Kevin still being Kevin lmao.

OKAY, ALL DONE, FINALLY, IM ALL DONE TYOINF ALL THAT OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO LONG 😭

But I still have artworks to show off, one for each AU, but trust me, I have alloooottt of art on these AUs, and more to come, so if this does well I’ll show more! Most likely on Twt first tho

1st: Virus AU

2nd: Regretevator AU

3rd: Hacker AU

4th: Deadly Sins AU

5th: Unnamed AU

6th: Pirate AU

#Roblox egg Kevin’s house #ekh #egg kevin's house #EKH AU #Egg Kevin’s House AU

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fandomonium-crack · 6 months ago

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Okay here’s a fun little facts about me. I keep track of Fake First Kisses for every BL series I watch. Obviously this is kinda based on my own opinion but my only rules are that a couple’s first real can’t be while one or both parties is drunk and that feelings must be confessed on both sides (not necessarily a blatant confession which is where things can get a little fuzzy).

The point of this is that MingJoe in My Stand-In currently have 14 FFKs which is the most of any couple in a BL I have ever watched. For Playboyy I counted total fake kisses between all the boys because that shit was way too confusing to keep track of. In total they had 34 but that is between six couples/ships. That’s only an average of 6 per ship and we’ve already almost reached half of the total number for that show with My Stand-In. With one couple. And the shows not even over yet. We haven’t even gotten their first real kiss yet.

Another interesting thing to me is the concept of “no kiss rules” like we saw in Pit Babe and are seeing in Wandee Goodday. There’s something about knowing the characters are actively sleeping with each other (very often), but yet they haven’t allowed themselves to give the other person access to this more intimate, vulnerable act. Babe tried so hard (not really 🤭) to hold onto that rule with Charlie but those boys still had 5 FFKs. I’m really interested to see if Dee can hold out or if he will also give in and let Yak kiss him before they get their heads out of their asses and realize that they like each other. I swear we get a scene every single week of them both leaning in only for Dee to remember his rule and shake himself out of his lustful haze 😔🤦🏼‍♀️.

Anyways if you’ve read the entirety of this rant, thanks for indulging me 😘

#thai bl #bl drama #my stand in #my stand in the series #mingjoe #joe x ming #playboyy #playboyy the series #pit babe #pit babe the series #babecharlie #charliebabe #wandee goodday the series #wandee goodday #yakdee #first kisses are really important to me okay #Fake First Kiss count #I legitimately have a spreadsheet for this you guys

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allthefujoshiunite · 1 year ago

Note

Sorry I hit the ask button before finishing. My fav trope are age gap ( > 5 years and even more), height difference and teacher-student relationship. Do you have any BL that fits either or mix of the above? I don't mind smut (explicit) but not a fan of pwp (just smut story).

Again, sorry if I'm too demanding, hope you have a good day @allthefujoshiunite 🍀🌼

Aaand we’re back. You literally listed some of my fave tropes there so BOY do I have recommendations! Not a fan of PWP either, so rest assured.

Let’s get this party started ~

Age gap + height difference + teacher/student

Young Bad Education (Dayoo): I fell in love with Mizusawa’s eyes on the cover and bought the volume in Japanese years ago without an ounce of idea what the story was about. No regrets. Young Bad Education and its continuation Young Good Boyfriend will feed your soul. You can read it on Manga Planet (Futekiya).

Hitorijime My Hero (Memeco Arii): This title is a classic so you might have already seen it but just in case. Hitorijime My Hero has an anime adaptation as well (I’m anime-only) and the manga has a spin-off with the side couple as far as I know. The height difference is less pronounced here but if you’re like me and you love delinquents as well, this will be your jam.

The Trees in Spring (Nakaoka Naka): I’m kind of cheating but I’ll do anything to recommend this title! MCs here are a teacher and student, but the teacher isn’t teaching the student, they meet each other in a different way. I have reviewed this title before and take any chance I can get to recommend it, so there you go!

Age gap + teacher/student

Warbler, Sing of Spring (Nago Nayuta): I felt like they don’t have height difference (and checked the first chapter again) but the MCs are always drawn in weird angles so I’m not sure. Another title with the delinquent sprinkled on top. Really enjoyed reading this, Nago Nayuta’s works have a cuteness I like and the uke in Warbler is kind of unhinged xD Love him!

The Neighbor I Desire (Makoto): This one started off a bit weird for me but I can assure you it’s super cute! I have written a review before so if you want more details, here you go.

The Good Teacher (Eeej): Another title I reviewed before. It’s pretty, fun but short and while the plot is not this series’ strongest point, I think it’s worth giving a shot.

Age gap + height difference

Love for Sale (Dal Hyeon-ji): It’s official, you guys. I will literally disintegrate if I don’t recommend Love for Sale, the doctor said it not me. But honestly, do yourself a solid one and read it if you still haven’t. The pinnacle of ultimate goodness. I wrote on LfS before but since the post contaşns spoilers and is more about sugar dating than a review, I’ll spare you the link. On Lezhin.

Love Me Doctor (ANA): Another series I constantly recommended on Twitter and got a couple of unassuming, kind-hesrted people to read it with me as well. Focuses on a university student and a urology doctor he had tovisit for his ED. If you’re comfortable reading a title where a doctor kind of uses his position to get to know a patient and stepping over boundaries, please give it a chance! TOTALLY worth the time. On Lezhin.

On or Off (A1): Can’t say I understood the drama with the artist and the series being wrapped up rather quickly, but I read this popular webtoon with joy! Not as big of a fan as the rest of the BL fans but if youdig these two tropes I think it’s worth checking out. On Tappytoon, but I think TOKYOPOP has released it in print.

Metro (Chika Hongo): This is more of a dramatic title, where a high school student is being touched regularly by the same man on the train and he likes it, until one day he follows him home upon being invited. If you prefer a story that’s laced with trauma and flawed characters, this is for you! On Manga Planet.

Pound Cake on a Sunday (Amida Shizuku): Man this series is SUPER funny that I had to reread today! A father and son lives alone after the mother’s passing and one day, out of the blue, the father starts complimenting the new transfer to the company about how he’s so beautiful or saying how shiny his hair is. Is his father gay? Did he finally lose it? Read and find out! Very different from your usual BL, worth your time!

Bonus - I’m a Dom and I Want You To Stroke My Head (KINACO): Has dom/sub universe (a big fan) height difference as well, but it’s a teacher x teacher pairing.

Whew! Sorry it took a lot of time to write because it’s not so easy to format these posts on the app, it seems. I hope you like my selection and as always, let me know if you liked anything from the list! I’m always eager to know what people think after reading something I’ve recommended. See you around!

#allthefujoshiunite answers #bl manga #bl manhwa #yaoi recommendation #yaoi manhwa #bl recommendation #yaoi manga #metro #on or off #love for sale #love me doctor #the good teacher #the neighbor i desire #warbler sing of spring #young bad education #hitorijime my hero #the trees in spring

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gatoraid · 5 months ago

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“got to be in the top 5 bl manga i’ve ugly cried to” can i get the rest of the list, i need recs pls 👀🙏

Hahaha what an amazing ask :DD

These are in no particular order and idk if you’re already familiar with all of these but here goes:

Nakamura Asumiko’s Classmates series; Kumota Haruko’s Itoshi no nekokke/ My Darling Kitten Hair series

Lumping these two together because they both made me cry tears of queer joy

The themes of family and coming out are handled so gently if sometimes bittersweetly in these stories

AND the wedding scenes in both series are soooo lovely I’m gonna cry just thinking abt them

(Classmates is published in eng by Seven Seas, Nekokke sadly does not have an official eng release after Jmanga went down and I think it’s kinda underrated in the eng speaking manga sphere sobb)

Marukido Maki’s Pornographer series & End of the World With You

Once again lumping two series together bc Marukido Maki just does Things to me okay

Honestly I think all of their series have made me look at my life and my choices and reflect on all kinds of things I never expected to be while reading a story abt idk dictation of erotic novels

Also the bittersweet and somewhat unusual rlationships Marukido Maki writes are so good

(Pornographer and its sequel & prequel can be read on Mangaplanet. End of the World does not have an official eng release, but both of these series do have decent live action adaptations, Pornographer’s is called ”The Novelist” in eng)

Harada’s One Room Angel

I know Harada is a big hit or miss for a lot of people, I am definitely a fan even if I don’t love all of their series

This is another story that made me think about life, choices, healing, finding meaning within yourself... so many themes that easily make me cry

(One Room Angel can be read on Mangaplanet. There is also a great live action series even though it hits a bit different than the original does)

Asada Nemui’s Sleeping Dead

Look it’s been a year since I read it but this story about zombies and trauma and the horrors of living is still haunting me

My full, very detailed write-up on Sleeping Dead can be found here

Overall I love Asada Nemui’s stories that dan be quite dark and brutal but that also have humor and humanity in them

(Sleeping Dead doesn’t have an official eng translation but it has been translated in French at least. Some of Asada Nemui’s other translated works can be read on Mangaplanet and Renta.)

Azuma Kaya’s The Scene of My Rumspringa

Adding this last because this is what inspired this whole ask

The themes of growing up and leaving your childhood behind and finding your own path are done SO.SO.WELL in this story. And the way Azuma Kaya’s visual storytelling brings those themes alive is just stunning

If there is anyone out there who still hasn’t read this Amish themed BL manga, I am begging on my knees: it is NOT a joke it is actually one of the most touching and sweet and unique BL stories you’ll ever read

(The official english translation can be read on Bookwalker and Inkr)

(I’ve also written about the spin-off Dear Gene that has a very similar vibe)

BONUS

Sweet Pool

This is not a manga but a horror BL visual novel

The way this made me break down sobbing at 3 am... still haven’t recovered even though it’s been years

The themes of loneliness, fate and choices affected me in some profound way, it is definitely my fave out of all the Nitro+Chiral visual novels I’ve played

(Jast Blue has published this in english, you can get the uncensored version on their website)

#asks #deaddove #thank uuuu what a delightful ask #bl talk

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wen-kexing-apologist · 10 months ago

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I know the show is on going but I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on Phaya and Tharn from The Sign? I'm a huge sucker for soulmate stories so I'm willing to overlook certain things just to get my fill of queer soulmate stories

Hmmm you know I haven’t actually thought about my relationship to Phaya and Tharn as a ship. Ignoring the issues I am having with some of the story structure and editing of the show, I do genuinely really love Phaya and Tharn as a couple. I am always a sucker for the loud and proud simp who is comfortable with not only their sexuality but with actively acknowledging their feelings for their crush. I love that we can also tell from the beginning that Tharn reciprocates his feelings for Phaya, and I think those types of dynamics where both characters are aware of the other’s feelings can add an interesting layer of complexity to the hidden feelings, sexuality struggle that is more often present in BL. (Side note I think this is also why I was really interested in Jim and Wen’s relationship in Moonlight Chicken). I like when there are other external pressures or internal traumas outside of sexuality that prevent two people from being together, even as or after they have admitted their feelings.

I have not read The Sign the book, but I did see a post floating around that described the backstory of the naga and garuda’s life and I am unfortunately much more interested in the dynamics that I heard about from that book description than what we got in the show. i wish they had fleshed their backstory out a little bit more, I don’t mind soulmate plots but I think that La Pluie did such a fantastic job with their soulmate subversions in 2023 that I have been a bit spoiled around other types of soulmate dynamics.

I like the way The Sign is loudly proclaiming verse rights with Phaya and Tharn always paralleling the other’s actions. I love the way the show has decided to visibly demonstrate their desire through the colored lighting and the bokeh effect. I like that we have gotten to see them playful with each other and gotten little details like them bickering quietly while Tharn was on the phone with the abbot. Those types of moments in shows really sell the feasibility of a relationship for me. I believe Tharn and Phaya work well together as a couple and I think Billy and Babe have incredible chemistry. I loved Billy in Secret Crush on You but this is Babe’s first acting gig and he is going toe to toe with Billy and doing a lot of incredible subtle work in his portrayal of Tharn.

Now I just need Phaya to get railed by Tharn like he so clearly needs and wants. Thanks for the ask!

Send Me a Ship And I’ll Share My Thoughts

#the sign #the sign the series #send me a ship #phayatharn #tharnphaya #phaya x tharn #tharn x phaya

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waitmyturtles · 2 years ago

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Turtles Catches Up With the Essential BLs: Bad Buddy Edition

[The Reasons and Gratitude: While QL has exploded in volume over the last half-decade, I’ve been juggling a career with making and feeding babies. Now that my kids are bigger, I’m catching up on the essential QL dramas. Big ups to @absolutebl’s encyclopedic lists that I use for reference, as well as the recommendations of many dear mutuals. For the Bad Buddy recommendation, I thank my forever darling, @the-nihongo-adventure! Thank you for reading my reviews of shows you’ve already watched! REALLY LONG POST COMING: caveat emptor.]

I’ve been thinking for days on how I should start this review. Bad Buddy has waylaid me with an emotional brutality (in a good way!) that I haven’t been able to shake for weeks. Couple that with a speedy education in the ways of Aof Noppharnach through Moonlight Chicken, and well, my middle-aged heart has taken a lot.

Before I dive in, I’d like to quickly cite the amazing @emotionallychargedtowel, who referenced Murray Bowen’s family systems theory in a post about pursuer-distancer couplings. Family systems theory posits that human behavior is shaped by the structure of the family unit as a complex social system. In other words: through spoken, unspoken, assumed, and expected demands, instincts, boundaries, and pulls/pushes, humans as individuals are conditioned to interact in society vis à vis how they learned to interact with others through their familial upbringings.

Why do I bring this up in regards to Bad Buddy? I haven’t even begun to plummet the sheer depth of analysis about BBS on Tumblr (I’m deeply impressed by the volumes of analysis by my new dear mutual, @telomeke-bbs, whose posts served as wonderful references while I was watching the show), so if I’m repeating popular analysis, I apologize.

But for me, BBS was rooted first and foremost in a study of intergenerational trauma, and how our two UNBELIEVABLE protagonists, Pran and Pat, battled expected roles and boundaries from their families/family systems and friends to end up together.

I know now, through Moonlight Chicken, that Aof is an utter master at layering themes together. To be honest, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like it.

And I want to say upfront that while I want to be an objective reviewer of this show, I absolutely cannot be. While I’m thinking about Aof’s mastery of studying intergenerational trauma through the lens of a QL drama, my heart aches, in passionate subjectivity, about how important his work is for young Asians watching it. I only can wish, as a first-generation child of immigrants from South and Southeast Asia, that I had been able to watch these shows when I was growing up. If I had seen Asians making shows about intergenerational trauma through an Asian lens, about very progressive topics like same-sex relationships in Asia -- I would have known that there was a world of support and shared experiences for the kind of intergenerational trauma that I and my friends faced, when we all were growing up, Asian in America and elsewhere.

This was a terribly long introduction to say that while many other themes percolated throughout Bad Buddy (in typical Aof fashion, as I’m now understanding), including school dynamics, Thai queer culture, unrequited love, familial acceptance of same-sex relationships, and more -- that for me, in a very biased way, I HAD to see this show through the lens of intergenerational trauma. This show helped me to have hope that generations of continental and diasporic Asians will be better able to fend off these pressures through the medium of drama art.

So. My thoughts on Bad Buddy are rooted in a lens of intergenerational trauma. But what I also picked up on, vis à vis the boundaries I mentioned earlier emanating out of families as complex social systems -- is that Aof threw in a little (actually a lot) of David Hegel’s thesis-antithesis-synthesis framework as well. This framework allows for the criss-crossing of boundaries to come to a unified resolution -- and good lord, Bad Buddy came to that conclusion so INCREDIBLY well. The Hegelian framework was the means by which, I think, Aof could explore tearing down the deep-rooted effects of intergenerational trauma on the Asian society depicted in BBS.

Throughout the entire show, Pran and Pat danced around boundaries. At least at the start of the show, they never dared to cross the line between the two garbage bins in the front of their houses. These boundaries had been CREATED by Pran’s and Pat’s parents. And the boys were taught from birth -- you cross that line, and bad things will happen. Don’t play with the boy next door. Don’t fall for the kids next door. So: don’t get caught in front of us.

But Pat and Pran crossed the boundaries BEHIND their houses, BEHIND the VERY watchful eyes of their families, starting at a young age, and keeping that boundary-breaking a secret. Pran crossed a significant boundary by saving Pa from drowning.

But then they went to the same university, and new boundaries formed, between their arch-rival faculties. Pat sees that pressure and acts within it, defending his engineering homies against Pran’s architecture friends.

We saw in the first episode that it would be Pat’s family that would be the first to begin breaking those boundaries as adults -- but it wasn’t Pat who began that work. It was Pa.

I’ve always found it interesting that it’s younger siblings who often have the “easiest” time breaking hard-set boundaries and family codes. I know, because I count in that category (and I know this is an overgeneralization, but just roll with me for a sec). Younger siblings see the shit their older counterparts -- parents, sibs, whoever -- create and deal with. And younger sibs then can develop better ways of managing the pressures that come from that shit. Myself included, I’ve often seen younger sibs be the first ones to marry in family units, to have children, to get jobs, to move away from home, etc. Younger siblings often have the ability to say NO more easily than their older family members. It’s, I think, a natural occurrence to take place in a family system of multiple siblings.

So it’s Pa who says to Pat: promise me you won’t hurt Pran. Right off the bat, she asks for a breaking of a boundary that Pat, his parents, and the engineering faculty homies want to uphold. And Pat, being devoted to his sister, agrees to the promise -- and the whole confused dance between him and Pran as adults begins.

I LOVED this. The show needed an immediate impetus to break what could have been a groaning, stereotypical Romeo-and-Romeo paradigm. This wasn’t going to end in mutual suicide -- hell no, not in a Thai BL. This drama needed to go places. As well, for me, I think Pa was set up to be an indirect foil to the pressures that Pran faces later in the series, simply by way of BEING in the form of a younger sibling.

The repeated theme during the first few episodes that I latched onto was Pran saying to Pat, “things don’t end well when I’m close to you.” In episode 1, Pat retorts -- “at least you won’t get transferred this time around.” In episode 4, Pran repeats himself, and guess what happens? He sees Pat with Ink, and experiences the repeated trauma of unintentional rejection at the hands of Pat.

So, Pran feels like he’s learning his lesson, time and time again. He’s thinking -- I like Pat, I can’t help but like Pat. But my parents might be right. Bad things happen when this dude is around. My heart gets broken.

What’s the difference between Pran and Pat here? Pat can exist more carefree, open, instinctual. He can like people more openly. He can be honest with his feelings. WHY? Because he had a family support system while he was growing up that allowed him to take risks -- because he had a sibling, because he was the eldest son -- because he knew, through his family structure, that despite his behavior, that his family would be there for him. He was simply raised differently, in part because his family was slightly bigger, and his family had LESS to lose if they potentially lost Pat to a lifetime of disapproval. Pat can take risks, because he’ll still have Pa, even if he loses his parents.

When I think about Pran, through the lens of intergenerational trauma, I go back to the family systems theory. While I was talking about younger siblings earlier, Pran’s a totally different story. He’s an only child. He IS the BRUNT of the familial pressure to conform to everything his family wants him to be. He was raised that way, and no one can help it, if the family unit is a triad. If Pran disappears from his family because of their disapproval -- not only do they NOT have a son, but Pran HIMSELF doesn’t have a family. He has far more to lose. He feels he can’t take risks.

I am sure there’s reams of analysis about how understandable Pran’s reaction to his first kiss with Pat was. But I took his walk away from Pat to be that recognition. Pran simply could not believe in a future with Pat -- no way. Pran would lose everything he knew.

Hegel’s framework? This is Pran’s thesis: while I love Pat, I can’t have Pat, because if I have Pat, I’m crossing a boundary that should never be crossed. My world will fall apart. I need to walk away and deny that that kiss ever happened.

And what’s the antithesis here? I think, at this moment in the series, the antithesis IS Pat. It’s Pat’s queer revelation, and his ABILITY to just MOVE on his feelings. In just ONE EPISODE, y’all! In episode 5! SO FAST! (Come AWN, Pat, you WINNER, LOVE YOU.) But that’s Pat for you -- Pat, the antithesis of Pran, the guy who can move, because he has less to lose.

(Let me stop for a sec, stop the analyzing. THAT KISS. THE BEST EVER. NANON! OHM! COME AWN! AAAAHHHH!!!!)

So what does Pat do in episodes 6 and 7? He starts the first SYNTHESIS: he crosses that damn boundary and chases after his man. He goes to the zero-waste village, and -- as SO OFTEN happens in Hegelian thesis-based frameworks -- the guys go to the sea, to the water, to cross the water, to kickstart Pran’s antithesis to his life thesis, and to begin their synthesis together, their connection. (Remember Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse and crossing the river, woop woop!)

Like I said before -- not to be a huge fuckin’ nerd or anything, but whoops, too late -- I think the Hegelian framework allowed Aof to WRITE this script and leverage the familial boundary risks for the sake of the show. Because, as I wrote at length in my review of the Cherry Magic movie, taking these risks from the perspective of the Asian family unit is EEEENOOORMOUS. Legit, fam: Asian families WILL dump children. There is disowning. It happens. It’s KNOWN, in the backs of our minds, BAKED UNCONSCIOUSLY into our understanding of who we are as Asian individuals, that our families might give us up, because many of our families have overtly threatened it. Even if there isn’t active disowning, parents can passively judge you and be disappointed in you for the rest of your life, and you damn well know it.

Overgeneralization? Whatever you think. But I’ve experienced it. My friends have experienced it. Kurosawa knew it when he risks disownment to stay with Adachi in the Cherry Magic movie. I severely risked it when I, like, grew up -- when I wanted to date, to get engaged, to get married. I didn’t talk to certain family members for years. My siblings’ relationships were strained. All because I wasn’t falling in line with my family’s expectations for who I needed to be vis à vis THEIR expectations of me -- to stay home and let them dictate how to live my life (literally, not joking).

Instead of doing a typical Romeo-and-Romeo set-up, I think what Aof was doing here, by way of having Pat step out first to begin the boundary-breaking -- and we know now WHY Pat could do that, because of his family system ALLOWING him to be a person to take more risks -- is that he was demonstrating that positive change could happen, the trauma could be stopped, if the guys created family between each other. AOF IS SAYING: I’M GOING TO PROVE THAT THEY CAN STOP THE TRAUMA TOGETHER. I’m crying right now.

And before I get further, another note about Aof’s brilliance. He allowed us to see HOW COMPLICATED Pran is, before the real boundary breaking began. He allowed us to SEE that Pran COULD MAYBE BE OKAY with taking a risk -- vis à vis Pran’s love for music. God, I was SO STRUCK in the scene when Pran is writing the high school song with Pat in episode 5.

I think Pran’s not just talking about love here. I think, indirectly, he’s also talking about the risk of riling his family boundaries up.

(I want to note quickly that both Aof and Jojo Phukhaotong really leverage Nanon’s acting beautifully in these moments -- besides this music scene, there was Pran and Wai in the library talking about relationships and the school play, and in Dirty Laundry, Night meditates on music and love to a sleeping Neon. Nanon really nails this unwinding in his acting.)

I think Aof included these scenes of Pran meditating like this, because Pat couldn’t just hold Pran’s hand at the beach and sweep Pran away. That’s not how the Hegelian framework works. You gotta be ready, to be active, you gotta do the WORK, to reach enlightenment. The entire series shows Pran’s journey to acceptance about himself and about the fate he’ll have with Pat. We, as viewers, needed to see Pran be ready to do that. Sure, he has a forever crush on Pat. But we’ve now established the utterly enormous risks he faced -- more so than Pat ever needed to deal with -- if Pran’s family learned about Pran’s feelings, leanings, and ultimate decision to be with Pat.

We needed to hear, verbally, that Pran’s hesitation was real, that he was balancing in a very complicated way, all the risks he needed to consider. Maybe some people got frustrated at the high level of his complicated feelings, but I think the pace and plot made total sense. And, oh god -- the scene at the beach, where they touch hands and imagine a world where their parents aren’t fighting. Oh my god. AAAAAHHHH. Tears. Synthesis, baby, synthesis.

So then. The boundaries between the guys come down. They start getting kee-yoot. The games in episode 7, the help with the play in episode 8. It’s chef’s kiss, y’all.

But the boundaries come roaring back. The trauma resurfaces. Even while Pran contextualizes to Wai in the library -- “you can’t change the person or the time” when you fall in love -- what also doesn’t change is the world around them. The faculties still hate each other. Pat experiences familial rejection for the first time in his dad’s disappointment about the architecture play. The relationship is revealed. Wai rejects Pran. The seniors reject Pat.

(FAN BREAK: luv you, Aof, that gratuitous shirtlessness at the xylophone, LOVED IT, ::pointing to Aof::, LOVED IT.)

But. Episode 9 kicks in. Korn comes thru, MVP. (Yum, satay.) And I see something in Pran, when he approaches Pat at the bench at lunch.

I see Pran finally, truly, CROSSING HIS OWN LINE. Pran could have PANICKED at the revelation of their relationship to the school. He could have used it as an excuse to chicken out, to back away, again to cite that bad things happen when I get close to you, Pat.

But Pran didn’t do that. He holds Pat down, he steadies Pat. They hold each other down, because -- oh god, my chest is aching here, I’m tearing up -- in that moment, Pran’s recognizing that you need to be there for the family you’ve chosen and made. These are HIS NEW BOUNDARIES -- his new family system and unit. It’s his, and his alone.

Sure, we see in earlier episodes that part of Pran’s love language is nurturing, through cooking for Pat (and sometimes Pa, too, omg so cute), and that he learned that at the hands of his mother. But I saw something different in that simple scene at the lunch bench, after Pat got rejected by his seniors. I saw Pran’s confirmation that he was going to stick the landing of the synthesis, once and for all. That was when he wasn’t going to use any other excuse, ever again, to walk away from Pat, as others had begun to do to Pat.

And then we get the last three brilliant, BRILLIANT episodes of this already brilliant series. Let me set this up, because I think the way Aof did this, as yuzh, was incredible:

Episode 10: There are too many things about episode 10 to list in this already enormous post. I may have to write a separate post about how I think episode 10 was one of the greatest single episodes of a drama I’ve ever watched (the penultimate episode of Extraordinary Attorney Woo also comes to mind).

In any case, the Hegelian framework comes roaring back. We’re nearing the end of the series, and we need to remember as to why we’re here, and how we got to this point. The episode served as a major reminder of Pran’s original thesis -- we learn the reason why the families were at war. We learn that the demands of the separation came from Ming and Dissaya. The boys come out to their folks. The truth of Ming and Dissaya come out.

We learn that Ming himself is a product of MAJOR INTERGENERATIONAL TRAUMA, from his father, so much so that he fucked up a major opportunity for Dissaya. Trauma on trauma on trauma. (Seriously relatable for almost all Asians with pressurized parents.)

And Pran -- PRAN -- TELLS HIS MOTHER, TO HER FACE, that it was HER traumatizing HIM that led HIM to be the way he IS. At the end of this episode, before he rejoins Pat, he finally confronts his mother, and begins his holistic antithesis for the final time.

The boys come back together at the end of the episode, and weep, and embrace. And Pat says: we’re getting the fuck out of here.

(Now’s a good time to link to a meme on intergenerational trauma that my cousins in SE Asia shared with me around the end of 2021 -- interesting timing that this was floating around the WhatsApps and LINEs of that period.)

Episode 11: Leaving. Antithesis. The sea. Crossing boundaries. Living their lives together.

Oh my god, my aching heart. Pat spending most of the episode insisting that they were going to live together, forever, in the village. The antithesis to their lives in Bangkok. Pran knowing better. Pat knowing it, too.

The fact that until the very last minute, the entire episode was spent in the village, meant SO MUCH TO ME. This episode gave the guys TIME to process THEMSELVES, and their decisions. Oh lord, tears on tears.

And: what did the guys do? THEY COMMITTED TO EACH OTHER. CREATING THEIR FAMILY TOGETHER. They were going to do it THEIR WAY -- and, AND, AND -- BREAK THE CHAIN OF TRAUMA that they both faced, as assigned and influenced by their parents, by leveraging their new family unit TOGETHER.

And who helped give them that oomph, that power? Who helped them get context to see that that work was WORTH DOING -- even if it wouldn’t end up changing their families?

Uncle Tong. The boys got to see that through Uncle Tong.

They got to see that one individual, or two individuals together, can’t change the world. The boys learned, indirectly, that they can’t change the world of their parents. But they can improve THEIR OWN WORLD.

Episode 12: SYNTHESIS.

When I was perusing the BBS tags for analysis, something I read piqued my interest: that the boys had to remain closeted to their families and friends.

I wouldn’t call it closeted. Instead, I want to guess what Aof was doing here.

I truly think Aof was showing compassion to the parental generation. It’s not the parents’ faults that they themselves were products of intergenerational trauma (peep the meme from earlier).

For me -- I’m an adult now, but I still carry the scars of my childhood -- I was disappointed not to see a bigger family resolution during my first watch of episode 12. But after a careful rewatch, I think Aof was being majorly realistic in his writing. These families weren’t going to come together in a finale, let alone in a day, let alone after DECADES of fighting.

Intergenerational trauma has to stop somewhere if you’re cognizant of it, and Pran and Pat’s parents weren’t cognizant of it. But: the guys certainly were. As we saw in the shots above, Pran himself CALLED OUT his mom for it in episode 10.

So I think I understand why Aof didn’t make a sparkling, holistically accepting ending out of this, because -- it was unrealistic. Ming and Dissaya still carry THEIR scars, and THEY need time to heal, too.

Their partners -- Pran’s dad and Pat’s mom -- are more ready for that change. They’re getting slightly caught up in the winds of change. Hell, even Pat’s mom says, “We are the adults” in episode 10 to Ming. Like Pa, Pat’s mom is demonstrating a little gentle nudge towards changing HER boundaries of the situation.

And the boys stated their stance at the end:

“Just like Uncle Tong said, we can’t change the world. All we could do was adjust to it, and live happily. We might not be able to change the people around us. BUT THEY COULDN’T CHANGE THE TWO OF US, EITHER.” [emphasis mine, obv]

I want to make one very last point that deeply touched my heart, and, I feel, confirms my theory about the boys making a new family unit together, complete with the boundaries of their choosing, and refusing to carry the trauma of their pasts. @telomeke-bbs wrote a lovely post, in part, about the meaning of Pran’s liquor gift to Ming. I totally agree with the analysis, and just wanted to add some cultural flavor.

Being an in-law in an Asian family structure means you show respect to your in-law elders. It’s just an unspoken, natural part of our being (and it helps if you like your in-laws). I’m married to a Westerner, but in many ways, I treat my Western in-laws with the same kind of respect as I would if they were Asian. So that means, I cook generously (they don’t expect me to do it, don’t worry -- I just like doing it, because it makes me feel like we’re family), and I serve up fine-ass cocktails (hell yeah). It’s fun, but it also makes me feel like I’m nurturing my extended family.

Pran gave the liquor gift to Ming, because....Ming is his family. Hey, Ming? Womp womp. You’ve got a son-in-law -- because Pran is taking on that role, despite your best efforts to reject that reality. And I see you, Ming, slowly, slowly, slowly begin to imagine that reality when you took a sip.

The reality is that when the boys became family to each other, they indirectly adopted each other’s families as their own -- because that’s just what happens in a relationship. And the liquor gift confirmed that. My heart SWELLED when Pran gave the gift to Pat, and I saw the duty-free bags in Pat’s family’s living room. How many times have I seen that scene in my life, when fam came back to visit from overseas -- scores of times. It meant so much. I’m going to bring a piece of overseas back to my family, even if my family, my in-laws, reject me. Maturity, motherfuckas. My man, Pran. Best son-in-law.

Aof took SO MUCH of what Asians expect about how our lives should be lived in this show, and absolutely turned it on its head. His SCRUTINY at what keeps adults back, at how adults raise children -- and about how children can CHANGE PARADIGMS, through love and partnership -- is CRITICAL COMMENTARY for young Asians, and young people around the world.

Oh, man. Do I have any more words? I’m all written out. If you got this far, thank you. This show WILL BE required viewing for my kids when they’re older. I want them to see what intergenerational trauma means to their Asian heritage. I want them to CALL ME and my hubs OUT for it. And I want them to know how they can be so strong, like Pat and Pran, to change the trajectory of their lives for the better.

*Tagging @bengiyo by request. <3

#bad buddy #bad buddy the series #backaof noppharnach #turtles catches up with thai bls #turtles catches up with the essential BLs #nanon korapat #ohm pawat #ohmnanon #intergenerational trauma #intergenerational trauma in asian societies #intergenerational trauma in asian families #david hegel #bad buddy meta #bad buddy the series meta #patpran #pran x pat #pat x pran #pranpat #aof noppharnach

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