#I have. many many thought on how laudna will see it all too.

[caeslxys]

Something I think is extremely interesting thematically when it comes to connecting what Downfall and the ideas it tackled to the overarching narrative of campaign three is that the things Downfall made a point to showcase of Aeor—Cassida, Hallis, the visual of an aeormaton proposing to her partner, the specific and intentional decision to shed light on a far from insignificant amount of the population being civilians or refugees—is that it plays in perfect parallel across from what is happening (and, really, has been happening) to the ruidusborn on Exandria in present.

Bear with me for a moment. Aeor is ultimately a city that was collectively punished for the decisions of its leadership. We could (and, judging by the amount of discourse around this particular topic already, probably will) argue about what the Gods’ motivation for all of this was—whether it be that they could not, in the end, bear to kill their siblings or that they were terrified at the prospect of mortality—for me it is a very healthy dose of both—but for this I am much more interested in the latter. They were scared. That, really, is the driving force behind both this arc and their role in c3 as a whole.

Why I point this out is: It is far more interesting to me, especially as we go back to Bells Hells this week, to dissect the Gods and their decisions not purely on sympathetic motivation alone but as beings in the highest seat of power in the highest social class in Exandria.

So, having established that the Gods (in relation to mortals) are more a higher social class than anything we could compare to our real life understanding of divinity and that Aeor was eviscerated largely because of their fear—what is the difference between those innocents in Aeor caught in the trappings of their autocratic government leadership and a divine war on the ground, and those of the ruidusborn being manipulated both by Ludinus and by the very thing that inspired such visceral fear in the Gods to start with. I would argue very little.

I think of Cassida, doing what she genuinely thought was right and good and would save people, her son, and the object of her worship—and how that did not matter enough to any of them to spare her because of the fear they held at the very concept of mortality. I think of Liliana and Imogen, one of which we know begged for the gods to help her or send her a sign for years on years, and how every single one of their largest struggles could have been avoided had the gods loved them, their supposed children, as much as they feared what they could be. I think of how the thing that did save Imogen, in the end, was a woman who herself existed in direct defiance of the gods will. I think of that young boy, sixteen years old, that Laudna exalted on Ruidus.

I think it’s completely fair to judge Aeor’s overall society as deeply corrupt—it was!—but its leadership and police force are not a reflection of every one of its citizens. Similarly, it is fair to judge the Ruby Vanguard as corrupt—it is!—but its multiple heads of leadership and even the god-eater further are not a reflection of every one of its members.

Notably, and what I think the Hells will latch onto, this did not matter to the Gods. It did not matter that Cassida was trying to help. She was still too much of a risk. Will it matter, what Imogen does? Will it matter, if that young boy is in the blast radius when they decide to take no further chances?

I’ve seen a lot of people say that the Hells will side with the gods and I don’t think I agree. Especially as Imogen has been scolded and villainized over and over for daring to try and save her mother—who herself has been seen by some as an irredeemable evil in spite of her drive being the exact same—her family—but when it’s the Gods it’s justified? When it’s the Gods, it’s sympathetic? Too sympathetic to criticize further than “they’re family”?

I obviously do not think the Gods should die or be eaten or what have you, and I certainly don’t agree with Ludinus (though I find him much more compelling than just a variation of hubris wizard), but when talking about the Gods in Aeor and in present it isn’t really at all about their motivation or their family. It can’t be. Too many people, including our active protagonists, lives have been effected for it to be as cut and dry as “they’re family”. These are your children. They are your family, too.

[rationalnerd62]

Every time I see a post about how someone doesn't understand Bell's Hells distrust/dislike of Gods, I just don't understand what show they were watching.

First of all, most of Bell's Hells don't even dislike the Gods. They just don't particularly care for them, which is a completely different thing.

Orym is from the Air Ashari, and as a result expressed very similar feelings towards the Gods than Keyleth in C1. Aka, of course the Gods exist, of course they've got a purpose for some people, but Ashari folks don't particularly care for them and are fine with mutually staying out of each other's businesses.

Fearne is a chaotic fey who honestly doesn't really care about religion. Sure, some fey are into the Moonweaver or the Archheart, but Fearne grew up with an Archfey that was having fun on the Matron's playground, so that's not really an environment with a big respect or admiration for Gods.

Chetney is an old dude who was minding his own business for a while. There wasn't really anything in his background to push him into religion, his deal was woodworking and then figuring out the werewolf stuff.

I don't remember Dorian mentioning anything religious based, so I'm putting him in the "do not care much / neutral" category. At least until shit happened with Opal. It doesn't matter that it's a betrayer God here, especially when you know the primes could have gotten rid of them.

For the rest, yes, there are religion related background components to mention. Both Braius and FCG were definitely pro Gods, but FCG started very neutral on that topic. Then they kinda started praying to the Changebringer as a thought experiment. I'll note though that their first (or one of their first? I don't remember) interaction with the Changebringer was her threatening them if they weren't helping her regarding the Ruidus stuff. And like, I get it, the Gods were scared as fuck, but having a shit day doesn't allow you to be a piece of shit to others 💀.

Laudna is an undead woman who got kicked out of places multiple times by religious folks for what she was, without a single care for who she was or her humanity. Gosh, she crossed paths twice with the same exemplar of the Lawbearer, decades apart, and both interactions were shit (Meghan, I'm in your walls!). Despite that, she doesn't particularly hate the Gods, but she's learned to stay away from religious folks & deities as a result. See her surprise at being accepted by clerics of the Matron! She wasn't expecting religious people to not hate her on sight.

Imogen was a depressed isolated pariah in her small town, praying for help with no answers (see one of Nana's team building exercises), and when she was finally out, it was with the help of her undead friend who she's very protective of and who doesn't have a great rep with religious folks. Yeah, she'd probably stay away from that too.

Meanwhile Ashton was raised in a cult that ended up very poorly (they've got long term health issues from that time!), and would rather avoid any sort of organised religion (no matter the topic) as a result, which honestly, that's fair.

And that's mostly just background stuff! During the campaign, they also met someone who got brought back to life and is still kinda resentful about it, they found a whole village that was very much not happy about religious folks coming up to their town and trying to order them around (and had to fight a temple as a result, which left a bunch of contradictory feelings there), and saw Gods destroy a whole city to keep their siblings safe, in the middle of the Calamity which saw many deaths because Deities were fighting against one another. Ah, and Vasselheim is apparently deciding who gets to know what wrt history and would hunt people who know too much. Like, the Grim Verity was hiding from both Vasselheim & Ludinus.

And I know a lot of stuff here is more about religious folks rather than Gods themselves, but you gotta understand that if the Gods are away and only talking to a select few, then their followers *are* their marketing team. Followers being shitty to some people *will* lead those people to be suspicious about religion and Gods (or at least to want to stay away from it).

Trust isn't owed to Gods, even Prime Deities. It's something that is gained through background, time, opportunities... Even in Exandria where the Gods are real, there are probably a lot of common folks who don't particularly care about religion (or maybe some of them just follow along with the dominant religion of their hometown, without diving much into it).

So no, Bell's Hells aren't particularly big Gods lovers. They're also not Gods haters (nuances, what a blast). Hey, in a different scenario, they probably would have loved staying away from Gods and religion entirely.

But guess who in the group actually had the biggest connection to a cosmic entity that significantly impacted their life? Imogen with Predathos.

And no, this doesn't mean this group wasn't appropriate for the plot of C3, or whatever funny thing people like to say about C3 and BH! I think C3 was made a lot more interesting by folks disagreeing on their relationship to Gods - it'd be boring if they all agreed lol.

But if you're looking at BH and are tearing up about "why don't they love my blorbos deities", seriously, have you paid attention to who those people are.

[eternalmomentss]

What are your favorite individual things about all the BH members?

Thanks anon, for making me yap about the Hells because I miss them dearly and they mean everything to me. I just went with like - character traits. I don't know if this is what you meant but here I go anyways...

For Imogen I would have to say it's that good mix of her ambition, determination and perseverance. Sometimes that can result in stubbornness but it's just something I find very endearing. And while she is fierce when it comes to what she wants, she never loses her gentle nature. Like, one of my favourite things about her entire arc is the sheer determination she displayed when it came to saving her mom, man...it was amazing to see. And it payed off! A strong and complicated mother-daughter relationship like that is so important to me. Also - you know, with perseverence I also mean being dehumanized and having to listen to vessel-arguments all the time and yet still remaining kind and on track and being willing to do whatever it takes, even though she was questioning the gods.

For Laudna I think it's her persistent happiness and kind heart. I am currently reading What Doesn't Break and honestly, if Laudna actually hated the world and felt the need to watch it burn down I wouldn't blame her. But she doesn't. She sees the good in so many things, be it a situation or just a single person and it's very inspiring. She sees the whimsy and fun in the smallest moments and that's hard to do even for people who haven't even gone through 0.1% of what she lived through.

For Fearne, obviously her absolute unfiltered wildness. This girl gives no fucks, she is unbothered and flawless and thriving and i love it for her. But also - it's gentleness. She seems aloof, sometimes detached (obviously because of her fey nature), but everything about her screams safety to me. It's really like Imogen says, she is like a flame that attracks moths. Like a beacon of hope.

For Dorian it's a very endearing mix of tenderness and selflessness. That man is made 100% out of pure affection and love and everything he ever does is for the people around him. He cares so, so much about others and the world and the way he keeps encouraging people and pointing out their own strengths to them is just so sweet and important to me (The entire war-camp moments, "I always did." "It's just us." "I love my mom too." etc, you name it). Though sometimes it makes me want to whack some self-confidence and self-appreciation into him too.

Orym obviously has this simple calm kindness about him. He tries his very best to keep the world good and generous and it was honestly so heartbreaking to see it all crumble beneath his feet as the stress spiralled out of control. He tried to hold onto one single safe outcome so stubbornly because he was scared to destroy the goodness in the world and honestly it's rare to find such simple, serious motivations in media these days. (I have much to say about Orym's internal biases about justice and what's good and bad btw, but that is a whole other story.)

Chetney is probably one of the most loyal little assholes you could ever find. One of my favourite Chetney moments i still when he snapped and spoke up about the injustice that comes with shipping them all to the front lines of the fight no questions asked. That little gnome was pissed, because how dare people talk down to his crew that went through hell and back and continues to walk through fire and get zero credit for it. Come correct or get the fuck corrected!

For FCG obviously it's selflessness. A lot of the time throughout the campaign they were very direct and sometimes even blunt in their therapy approach but at the end of the day, they really just always wanted to understand their friends and themselves and offer a realitsic and unique solution to their problems. Their inner thoughts during the Otohan fight about how the crew made them feel whole and alive brings it all to its peak.

Ashton always has this deep and intense understanding of the small, broken people and their pain. They are reckless and rude and brash but god are they careful. When they handle something fragile, they handle it with care. They always ask questions, offer help or even just give it without even asking. They always protect everyone. From early on when they ran back to save Dorian and FCG from falling depris, to gently talking to someone whose mind has been tempered with and adjusting to their needs, assuring Laudna "she isn't going to take you" during the Delilah encounter, to dragging Imogen out of Predathos while breaking apart at the edges. They understand and they care.

Braius is obviously a bit harder, so uhm I have to say forgiveness maybe. When he found out about Jester he heard her out and found the strength to forgive her too. Actually that might be one of the most surprising things about him. Good on you, cow! Go draw those dicks now!

Thanks for asking, this is just another excuse to be annoying.

[ittybittyremy]

"That blade's bigger than you. We can all see you taking Otohan's blade"

Genuine question: When you FIRST heard that line (before everything else happened), how did you interpret it?

Because I've seen so many people saying that Laudna was OBVIOUSLY trying to start a conversation. I'm starting to wonder if people have hindsight bias (perceiving past events as more predictable than they were) or if I'm just that bad at identifying tone.

When I watched the latest episode live, I initially thought that was a jab at Orym's height and him not being subtle (even though he wasn't trying to be) about taking the blade. I took it more as a funny jab than a serious jab.

When I looked back on that quote after the episode, I thought Laudna's saying that was her being passive-aggressive. I did not take that as a conversation starter.

BUT THEN when I went on the internet, I saw many people saying THAT was an attempt at a conversation—an attempt at communication that Orym ignored ("I hear her as I go down the stairs").

Maybe it's my autistic self being bad at identifying tone, but I wouldn't have noticed that. I would've ignored her too.

Don't get me wrong, Orym didn't communicate but neither did anybody else. NOBODY tried to explicitly communicate what they were feeling (about the blade and him taking it) before that all went down (that night). There was no conversation before he left, and there was no conversation before he went to bed.

[topaz-mutiny]

I think the fans are underestimating how differently people can process things.

I am consistently seeing posts say "Ashton/Tal were repeatedly warned the shard was not for them/will 100% kill them", when this was absolutely not the case, and, more importantly, it is very likely for groups of people to completely misinterpret the warnings. Even if they've known each other and loved each other for a decade.

I certainly thought the warnings were not clear or frequent enough so I was shocked like lightning in the latest episode that they were meant to be absolute death flags.

Please note that I'll mostly refer to the fictional characters, I don't want to bring the people behind the characters too much into this.

First, I would like to point out, the show takes place over weeks and months with plenty of breaks and interruptions. That is plenty of time and opportunity for memories to get faded, muddled, crossed-over with other memories, etc.

The "warnings" happened two weeks to a month ago. And even when they were fresh on the cast's mind, here are the warnings verbatim (bold is my emphasis):

But be warned, holding the strength of the two in one vessel might sunder it. You bear the dormant strength of the empress. Find and bestow the might of the emperor.

- Evontra'vir, episode 74, aired October 5th. The conversations move on to unrelated things with no followup.

Ashton: He also said it might be dangerous for these two shards to intermingle. Or he didn't say dangerous, he said that-- it could destroy me. Orym: --A chance the vessel could break. Laudna: --The vessel <air quotes> could break. Fearne: Wasn't there something if you put them together with the right thing that it'll be okay? Ashton: It might come together and be okay, yeah. -- Dancer: Maybe if it were to meet one of its own ilk, it could awaken. Allura: What you said as a point of warning likely is true. To have both within a singular vessel, it's possible one could survive, but it's also highly possible that it would rend you into a thousand pieces. -- Allura: We're in a strange area of experimentation and unknown knowledge. -- (after finding out Ashton has a fascimile of a Luxon beacon in their brain) FCG: So he's got two things in him or them? Allura: It would seem, which is why I'm a bit--Well, you're either the greatest weapon we could hope for in this time, or will be our end. I couldn't tell you. Orym: Boy, maybe we don't add a third thing. Ashton: I was put together by bits and pieces. This was not an intentional thing and it, I honestly shouldn't have survived it. It was, literally, I was put together with junk. Allura: In an odd way, your fragmented nature might be what keeps all of this in check. ... Perhaps we don't put another powerful entity within your form.

- Various, episode 76, aired October 19th.

To me, these warnings were not clear in the slightest.

To me, these warnings were interspersed with so many words like "possible", "might", and "chance" that I completely misinterpreted the situation as "For Ashton it is dangerous but doable" instead of "The Game Master is telling you Ashton's character sheet will be ripped up."

This is the problem with using in-character voices and using descriptors that imply chance or flexibility. They can drastically weaken the meaning of a phrase such that people like me will mistake it for something else.

Because that's how my brain works. "May", "chance", "perhaps" suggest to me a reasonable set of odds for an action and does not come across as the grave warning a game master would want.

And as a reminder, these muddled warnings were weeks apart and weeks away, which can make remembering the meaning even worse if you've already misinterpreted them. That's why I was 100% on board with Ashton taking the shard. It seemed reasonable but dangerous, so when Matt said "I warned you." in that grave tone and with that grave look I was thrown for a loop. I went "oh no! those were serious warnings!?" and the panic started setting in.

Also a contributing factor was the pressure and lack of communication from Bells Hells.

Fearne did not want the shard, and finally stated that thought aloud to Ashton. For Fearne and Ashton, that meant the only choice left was Ashton, because, for one reason or another, the 5 other people in Bells Hells repeatedly assumed and pushed the shard onto Fearne and wrote themselves out of the equasion. FIVE characters absolved themselves of being active participants. Once the idea of Fearne came to mind and this Emperor Fearne/Empress Ashton/Callowmoore shipping dicotomy, Bells Hells just stopped talking about it and never once considered if any of them should take the shard should Fearne refuse.

So... yeah that's how my brain works.

[randoimago]

Hi! A little while ago you got a request for Orym and a reader who is really awkward but is really trying to be friends. Could you please do the same prompt but with Ashton, Fearne, Laudna and Imogen? Thank you!!

Fandom: Critical Role

Character(s): Ashton, Fearne, Imogen, Laudna

Note(s): Here you go!!

Ashton

Making friends isn't his thing. He's hotheaded and blunt and just doesn't care about many things. Caring is hard and most things he cares about end up breaking so he doesn't like adding people to the list.

The stares you give him and fidgeting you do makes him fidget and start overthinking. He'll bluntly make a comment about you "taking a picture, it'll last longer". He just assumed you were staring cause he's weird looking (something that he doesn't take offense to because it's true).

But you aren't completely scared off by him and so he decides to talk because that's something normal people do. Honestly finds it hilarious that you'd want to be friends with him, but whatever. Ashton ends up mad at himself that he adds you to his list later.

Fearne

Fearne sees you staring and looking like you want to say something, so she's already in your space. Like Ashton, she assumes you're staring for a reason. Unlike Ashton, she thinks you're staring because she's hot.

Fearne talks to you, being playful and asking what your deal is. And then she learns that you're trying to figure out how to be her friend.

She's very touched by your words and finds it adorable. But she's Fearne and she can't help saying, "Why would I want to be your friend?" Before laughing it off and saying "Just kidding." She actually means the just kidding this time.

Imogen

She's used to the stares and uncomfortable vibes other people have around her. She's honestly tempted to open her mind to hear what you're thinking, but also doesn't know if she should in case it is more negativity. Eventually gives in and listens to your surface thoughts.

Imogen feels bad as she hears you contemplate how to talk to her and seem cool. She thought you were thinking bad about her, but you're just wanting to be friends.

Thing is, Imogen can be awkward with approaching people too. But she still does, giving a small "Hi." and then trying to figure out what to do. Should she compliment your shirt? Talk about the weather? You're both just awkward together, she's tempted to bring her extrovert friend into the mix.

Laudna

Laudna is pretty much the same way. She's so awkward, but that's not going to stop her from making friends!

Will introduce her dead rat to you. Will show you the fun/scary dolls she has. Ooh maybe you'll like to hear a joke! It's a classic from Whitestone. A real tree-t (treat), if you will.

And she wants to hear all about your hobbies too. You don't even get to be quiet or reserved as she is in your space trying to become friends. She just hopes you don't notice her quick glances to Imogen to make sure she's getting a thumbs up that she's doing a good job.

[zeephyre]

CRITICAL ROLE CAMPAIGN 3 EPISODE 85 SPOILERS

IM LITERALLY ABOUT TO LOSE MY MIND YALL

Where do I even ??? start ???

I haven't been posting c3 as the episodes dropped in...a while actually, like right before they went to the feywild. i have many thoughts and many feelings about so many things that have happened since then and I'll summarise them so I can get to THIS episode.

fearne and ashton - love their shard powers, they're literally royalty and terrifying, and i want them to make-out. i can't wait to see them go full primordial again in a real combat situation.

imogen - save her. literally save her. free her, even. i love everything about the call of ruidus when it comes to imogen on a narrative standpoint, but...God I get so worried that we're gonna lose her. I don't mean she's gonna betray the hells, but...ruidus could take her and then i would simply perish.

laudna - before i really get into wtf went down this episode with her and she who must not be named, i gotta say... im worried. very very worried. however, that fireball was objectively the best shit ever.

fcg - i can't even really remember anything stand out abt fcg except what Sam pulled last night so.

chetney - still the heart of the team, still my baby girl, still my favourite. love him to bits.

orym - i think laudna is going to beat his ass one of these days and im... even more concerned about that after this episode. his nana morri powers are cool as fuck tho... does that make him a warlock now? i know he isn't multi-classing but wouldn't that be cool

ANYWAY WE'RE ON THE FUCKING MOON AND WE GOT MOON LORE AND EVERYTHING WAS SHITTY THEN FUN THEN SHITTY THEN FUN AGAIN THEN REALLY FUCKING SAD THEN IT ALL WENT TO SHIT AGAIN.

the moment imogen reached out to ruidus and matt mentioned that she could sense where other ruidusborn were i fucking knew that otohan was high tailing it in their direction, and i thought they instinctively knew that too but they probably got so distracted.

we were travelling for hours and had a huge fight that almost got them captured (not to be confused with the OTHER two fights that almost got them captured) and I was begging and screaming and crying for them to get a long rest safely hidden away AND THEN THEY SPLIT THE PARTY WITH BARELY ANY SPELL SLOTS OR HIT POINTS AFTER BEING DRAINED FROM ANOTHER BATTLE WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM

(Sidenote, the willmaster really opened up the door to the further increase in moral pondering in a certain number of hellians. i do think using the harness is disgusting and hypocritical, but i don't condemn them for it, it just...makes me wanna vomit thinking abt what ludinus did with it. not to mention the HUNGER parallels between laudna and ludinus...its just not good yall. also??? objectively funny that fcg seemed weirded out by the idea of killing the willmaster, not just with the harness but in general, considering how many people they've killed up to this point)

idk if its just the inherent terror that an evil old hot lady can inspire that makes otohan so much more terrifying to me than ludinus. like, objectively, ludinus is a worse threat and could wipe them out EASILY but jesus otohan is like the damn reaper to me. it's the trauma from the laudna, fearne, orym massacre mixed with the underlying little drop from their uthodurn romp that let us know that resurrection spells are NOT working and idk if that got fixed bc of time passing or distance from the leylines but i really did not want to test that shit out in real time

thank...god that sam riegel is a damn genius player, that banishment of fcg and fearne was the ONLY reason fcg survived. and thank GOD FOR KEYLETH BECAUSE WITHOUT THAT CLOUD SPELL BELLS HELLS WOULD BE VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY DEAD RN.

God, "otohan has us. run." is going to haunt me just as much, if not more than the almost tpk. it just...shot me straight back to bassuras and the plan to run that just...immediately fell apart.

god fcg truly could have died there. and fearne would be captured. i know the hells would be too stupid and too brave and too loyal to leave fearne with otohan in their cloud form but can you imagine a world where fcg was gone, fearne was captured and the hells had to switch from recon to rescue... itd be stressful but pretty fun.

thankfully it didn't come to that and some good came from the shit.

ruidus is so beautiful. i was worried they'd end being trapped under ruidus while they explored (not that I wasn't on board with the detours, I wish this wasn't a time sensitive mission), but matt's imagery of the fossilized elven structure and garden made me sad but also happy that we got to see it.

i cannot believe that the stupid plan to shove fearne up a water hole happened AGAIN and it ended up with us FINDING A BACK HOLE TO RUIDUS GOD I LOVE THESE CHUCKLEFUCKS WHEN IS THE NEXT EPISODE MATT YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO ME. WHERE EVEN ARE THEY??? IS IT EVEN EXANDRIA???? WHAT DO WE DO IF IT IS EXANDRIA??? WHERE DID THIS HOLE EVEN COME FROM???? DOES IT CLOSE AND REOPEN??? IS IT STAGNANT?????? IS IT FUCKING STABLE?!?!?!?!?!

God...we could go back to keyleth and the others and actually invade ruidus without encountering the ruby vanguard. (that's if they're alright because otohan did go out onto the battlefield and we don't know what fhe fuck she did when the illusion fell through)

GOD. IS IT THURSDAY YET??? WE HAVENT EVEN FOUND THE RESISTANCE????

[somewhatsentientspellbook]

It has been such a pleasure over the last few episodes, seeing Ashton embrace the title of ‘hero.’ The moves that they are making are really cementing themself as a leader with a desire to positively affect the world. I love this shade on Ashton, and I can’t wait to see where it goes, though I have been struck with a somewhat worrying/exciting thought.

Not too long ago, I was reminded of Taliesin’s original plans for Percy, that plan being that his story would end tragically. Of course, we know that the story didn’t turn out that way, and Percy is now living in Whitestone with his wife and children. But it got me thinking that Caduceus’ character wasn’t designed with classic tragedy in mind, and also achieved a happy ending. Then I started to consider Mollymauk. Did Taliesin intend for the tiefling to have the tragic end he got? My gut instinct is to say no.

That's how this table came into existence:

We’ve got a missing spot, don’t we? We’re missing a character that successfully achieves its predetermined tragic ending.

Taliesin has a love for creating characters with questionable and self-destructive coping mechanisms. Percy and his affinity for making deals with demonic entities and creating weapons capable of untold destruction, Molly and his hedonism and indulgence of drugs, alcohol, and mischief, and even Caduceus’ repression and ignorance towards anything that makes him uncomfortable. Ashton Greymoore is no exception. Their anger, gambling and alcoholism are all one big coping mechanism for their childhood and chronic pain.

Part of me believes that this hero mentality has become another coping mechanism for Ashton to abuse. By stepping up, Ashton has been lifting the burden of leadership from other party members, the notable cases being Laudna, Orym, and FCG. He’s been encouraging them to explore their emotions, and ever since the Solstice, he has made himself the person they can lean on for support. Ashton wants to be a hero, even if it’s at the expense of their own well-being.

Ashton has made it clear on multiple occasions that their chronic pain is handled better under greater pressure, and soft, delicate touches cause them far more discomfort (even if the softer touches lead to less trouble in the long-term). But the problem with becoming a ‘rock’ for others is that Ashton must put himself under immense emotional pressure. While they may handle it far better in the short-term, that tactic is going to cause more damage the longer they indulge it. I feel like the lyrics of ‘Heroes' by Emmy Curie best describe my feelings on the matter:

"But you’re forgetting the thing about heroes, kid, they always have to fall"

(For the record, the song is simplistic but pretty, and I highly recommend listening to the whole thing. The lyrics apply to so many characters, and not just from Critical Role)

While I love this arc for Ashton, part of me is left wondering if Taliesin has been building up this character for the purpose of falling even further. Is Ashton going to achieve the tragic ending that Percy was deprived of? Will he be the one to occupy the final quadrant of that table?

[utilitycaster]

I'm curious what your thoughts on the (non-)resolution of the group talk in the beginning are. How do you think this will impact the group in the near future? Personally I'm really disappointed because the talk between Laudna and Imogen was so strong but then nothing else happened. The whole situation feels unfinished and unsatisfying like this.

So on the one hand I agree the part with Imogen and Laudna was fantastic and the rest was like ok this has lasted way too long and involves so many false comparisons (Orym and Dorian are not imo ticking time bombs; Fearne and Ashton are just people with terrible impulse control at times but are unlikely to be taken over by anything but their own poor decisions; Chetney and Imogen's likelihood of being taken over is highly situational and they have both taken steps to control it) in the service of like, this is a D&D story and you're not going to be like hmmm maybe you SHOULDN'T go to the arctic under the influence of Delilah Briarwood.

However, "this single conversation was kind of unproductive since, demonstrably, love and togetherness are not working" does not to me equal "unsatisfying." It's an ongoing campaign! I'd love to see this blow up in their faces! If Delilah does represent a ceding of agency and Laudna's giving her more and more, then what happens when she attacks someone else in the night, or turns on them in combat, because she's wielding the most cursed weapon of all? Laudna said she'd take it from there when they've gotten Ludinus, but that doesn't mean the Vanguard or Predathos will be stopped by then, and I don't think she has a plan, so are we just delaying the inevitable?

I suppose what I mean to say is that, while the talk with the rest of Bells Hells was definitely...well, see my WBN posts, I'm not a touchy-feely person both for abrasive northeasterner reasons and also because I genuinely believe people often use warmth and softness and "we're all friends here" to hide a lack of stern but genuine kindness and goodness and this felt like that kind of situation, I also didn't expect this to be resolved in a way that actually fixed anything in one episode. The options really are "we go to Aeor having decided this is a risk we're willing to take" or "we go to Aeor having decided we have to, but everyone's mad at each other" and both leave room for conflict and Delilah fuckery wide open.

[mareastrorum]

Others have said this more eloquently, but it’s been eating at me that so many things feel late in C3. That’s such a strange feeling given that only about 3 months have passed in game. I think one of the issues may be that so much of the information the Hells want to find is incredibly niche. Who would know about XYZ and be willing to share it truthfully? How is that reconciled with the fact that more powerful and well connected people didn’t find out first?

But Matt already fixed that: each of the Hells is tied to plot-relevant stuff in their backgrounds. The actual problem is almost all of them resisted exploring it.

Laudna’s patron is Delilah Briarwood, the necromancer who helped a lich ascend to godhood and who personally knew Ludinus. Did Laudna ever meaningfully press for info on that? No. Laudna is not a curious person, and her view of power doesn’t lend itself to the idea that it needs to be understood to be wielded, so she doesn’t bother.

Ashton was a member of a cult obsessed with the power of primordials and returning to that origin. They turned him (an aasimar) into a titan of blood. Did he seek out more info about the Hishari once he realized he’d spoken to a former member? No. Ashton also has dunamancy glass in his brain. Did he ask questions of the Bright Queen, the oldest living and most devout worshipper of the Luxon? No. Ashton spoke once to Keyleth and Essek (each skeptics of their respective counterparts) and sought no further info. After all, Ashton prefers that sort of attitude to sincerity.

Fearne’s father had allied with Ludinus and intentionally sired her to be a Ruidusborn vessel for the Predathos-in-a-can plot. We only just got to her having a conversation with him last month when he had been searching for her the entire campaign. Honestly, I think Matt had been intending for this confrontation to happen sooner, but the Hells were too good at preventing the abductions that would have led to it. She also hesitated to approach him until he was turned into a tapestry. I wish the Hells had been more incompetent for a bit, just so we could have gotten that earlier.

FCG was an aeormaton revived by Devexian. Holy shit, what would D have known about Downfall, Dominox, or the Malleus Hammer? We’ll never know because FCG wanted to avoid seeing Devexian as much as possible. That’s not even getting into the comparisons between gods making mortals what they are (instead of endlessly reincarnating souls) and mortals making aeormatons with souls of their own while designing them to be controllable. And then D gave those he revived free will and left them alone—similar to the Matron’s reasoning of the last episode. That perspective would have been phenomenal 50+ episodes ago.

Orym personally knew Keyleth, but he didn’t want to bother her. Like, that’s it. He thought “I’m just a bodyguard” so hard that he delayed any interaction with her by several dozen episodes. Yeah, yeah, wizard hubris, but humility is a slog for pacing in D&D. Resisting the call isn’t just “I don’t wanna” it’s also “of course it couldn’t be me” and man did Orym commit to that.

Out of all the Hells, Imogen was the only one actively seeking out information about her background at all times, but she also struggled with whether she wanted to be a leader and what that meant (control versus direction). I think that was a good balance, and honestly, her arc is the only one that feels satisfying.

Chetney didn’t shun seeking info out, but it didn’t seem immediately relevant. It makes total sense that Travis wouldn’t presume it would have mattered. There’s only so much his background could offer given that he is not Ruidusborn, some kind of mage, nor meaningfully connected to a Big Bad. That said, once he dug in, we got good intel from the Gorgynei and Molaesmyr, both due to Chetney’s connections. Travis has also been a fantastic source of info with grim psychometry. But that’s also history, not personal connections, and so that feels a little removed from the story.

I adore that Braius has decided that he is here to do a job, and he’s going to do it, personal conflicts aside. He’s gonna kill Ludinus. Maybe for the Lord of the Hells, maybe for the Platinum Dragon—fuck it, maybe for the Moonweaver and the rest of his presentation is a prank. But he’s gonna do it, and that’s really the type of bullheadedness the Hells need. His crisis of faith also brings in a perspective that not liking one god doesn’t mean needing them to die. He’s just decided to fuck with them, and they decided to fuck with him right back. Here’s plate armor of truth to help you save the world, you lying sack of shit, enjoy.

Take this as a lesson: don’t make a character who lacks interest in the world or what happens to it. Even NPCs care about something, so this isn’t a “NPC party” problem. It’s like the cast looked at Percy (single-minded and meant to be unredeemable) and Molly (idiot who was going to resist the call and get the Big Bad chasing him down) and a majority decided to try one or the other. Which, like, that would have worked with one or two on the team, but not a majority.

I could rant forever about this, I think, but it’s not worth the time. This campaign highlights why I tend to prefer villain stories: they know what they want, and they work toward it. Characters like the Hells are just too spineless most of the time. Indecision isn’t entertaining; I only tolerate it because I expect consequences to follow, and that’s fun.

If there’s one thing I can expect from Matt, it’s consequences.

[ratinayellowbandana]

this is probably a little too on the nose, but as soon as I saw "color prompt" I thought purple- bc.. well. you know. Though actually reading the prompts under purple all of those have imodna vibes so I think that means it was meant to be

if you want a specfic one, i like 1. "You know you're my best friend, right?", but any of the ones under purple would be cool!!! hope you have fun writing!!!!

woo! this one was very fun and tbh i needed the fluff.

length: ~500 words

~~~

Imogen is drunk. 

It’s only natural, Laudna supposes, after the shitshow of a week they’ve had that they might have a little fun. Imogen has her circlet now, after all, and it has been a gift. The defensiveness that has been ever-present across all the years they’ve known each other has faded from Imogen’s brow. She is at ease here, surrounded by their friends, talking and laughing and swapping jabs across the table. 

F.G.C. is off searching for another round while Fearne leans casually in the corner of the booth, reclining against the backrest with Orym pressed into her furry side. Mister is perched on her shoulder, nuzzled into her neck. His tail flicks her cheek, and she swats at him, tutting, with a loving laugh. 

A curious conversation occupies Orym’s attention, but he smiles and nods at Chetney, who is demonstrating a new-old carving technique he picked up from the Ashari. A toy sword rests in his lap, and he chisels away with impossible speed. Wood shavings cling to his hair and clothing, but he manages to avoid the table, accumulating an impressive pile of dust under his seat instead. Laudna makes a note to tidy it before they move upstairs for the night. 

Imogen is warm against her right side, engrossed in an animated argument with Ashton, who humors her with a smirk and raised eyebrows, nodding along to the point Imogen is making the way you only can when addressing someone who is well beyond your level of inebriation. 

Does Ashton get drunk? Laudna thinks suddenly. If his outsides are made of stone–or titan? Is that a thing one can be made of?–does it affect his insides, too? Can insides be made of stone? Would they absorb alcohol? He eats, certainly, but…

She has a vague notion of asking, but they might not even know, she realizes wondrously. How many people have seen their own insides? Her mind conjures gleeful images of splitting him open to see, revealing stoney intestines and a rock-shelled heart. 

With consent, of course. 

She’s only curious. He might be curious, too, after all, and she doesn’t want to hurt him. 

Imogen squeezes her thigh and draws Laudna back to the present. “Y’alright?” She asks, eyelids drooping ever so slightly.  

“Oh, yes,” Laudna affirms brightly, blinking owlishly, “I was only thinking of Ashton’s insides.”  

They raise an eyebrow. “Gods, you’re weird,” he guffaws. 

“Thank you,” Laudna replies, lips splitting into a broad grin. A conjured drop of ichor falls from the corner of her lip, trailing down her chin for dramatic effect. 

“Damn, I’m glad we’re friends.” He wags a finger and takes a swig from his tankard, shaking his head. 

Imogen leans further into her, and Laudna has to stabilize herself against the edge of the booth. 

Imogen hums, looks up at Laudna, “Y’know you’re my best friend, right?” 

“Alright, asshole, I’m not trying to steal your girl,” Ashton scoffs, rolling his eyes. 

Laudna ignores him. “I should certainly hope so,” she murmurs, pressing a kiss to Imogen’s forehead. Imogen beams. 

“Gross.” 

“Shut it, Ashton.”  

[unicyclehippo]

Grotto

it’s a little silly, how scary it is to be in love.

imogen imagines herself standing on a cable stretched between two distant points; her stomach churns as the wind buffets at her, tugs at her clothes. the spire she left was herself, solitary, and she moves toward laudna. she has been moving toward laudna this whole time, she knows, has been walking this cable the whole time. it’s just that now she can see the fall, the drop below her. and she’s fucking terrified. but the drop isn’t real—it is, she supposes, rejection or uncertainty or loss, something like that, or all of it. it’s normal, allegedly. not knowing someone else’s mind and what they feel and what they really think of you. she’s never had a problem with that before. and she doesn’t truly have a problem with it now.

imogen opens her mouth. she wavers on her cable and as the sway hits her stomach, she sets her sights on laudna. ‘how much do you care about me?’

laudna lights up like the sun. a cheeky smile crawls across her lips. ‘is it terrible of me if i say to the moon and back?’ she chortles when imogen swats at her shoulder. captures her hand in a light grip. ‘the affection i have for you is truly immense,’ she says. ‘i cannot think of what i wouldn’t do for you.’

‘will you…sing for me?’ imogen asks. she steps closer on the cable, fears easing; she steps closer on the street, curls her arms around laudna’s waist.

‘any time you wish.’

‘dance with me?’

‘always,’ laudna agrees, and proves it, sliding them into what she recalls of a waltz. there’s no music here but they don’t need it. there’s the patter of imogen’s heart, and the thud of laudna’s, and that’s more than enough. ‘we can go to a dance hall, if you wish. it should be nicer now that you don’t have to worry about all those minds.’ her fingers graze the circlet, attention fond as it is sad. ‘i’ll build a house for us,’ she says, as they sway in the middle of the street. the traffic parts around them; irritation never touches them, grumbles ignored. ‘it’ll be far enough from any town that you won’t hear anyone else and you can take this off. you can make a house inside my head,’ she muses, eyes bright, smile bright.

‘you still want me in there? even though i don’t have to be?’ the cable - the heights - the lurch, the worry. laudna, safe and solid ground.

‘i love to have you in my mind,’ laudna says, easy, earnest.

did she mean it? what is the distance, imogen wonders, between her version of love and laudna’s? would that she could let herself into laudna’s mind and walk it. find the edge of her devotion and see if it aligns with her own. did she ever worry, as imogen does, that she loves too much, too hard, too much teeth and gristle and hunger?

‘you’re in mine all the time,’ imogen confesses. ‘i think about you all the time.’

‘oh?’

‘ashton took me to this grotto and i thought, laudna would love this. i spoke to this alien mind thing and wished you were there to see the skeletons. everything i see reminds me of you. i feel like. every time i think i know how much i love you, it gets bigger.’

laudna’s eyes glint. ‘first of all, that’s what she said. and second, darling imogen, my dearest,’ she croons, and kisses her. imogen’s cable vanishes and she is reminded quite sweetly that she can fly. the nerves remain, fluttering in her belly. she embraces them, and laudna. ‘for all that i despise her, delilah has taught me many things. she persists in love undying, a devotion beyond life and death and sanity.’ laudna smiles down at her. ‘when i had lost all else to death, i could speak your name. does that answer your question?’

[paperglader]

CR C3 EP55

Thoughts: no thoughts, head empty, just robots KISSING AND HOLDING HANDS!!

First kiss of the campaign!!!!! Insane. Just insane. I'm so freaking happy. I love FRIDA so freaking much. FCG🥺 I just love romance so much and it makes me so excited cause I love these characters a lot and I'm so invested in their stories, I love watching them grow and find meaning. Just, ugh, I love it.

So much info dump in one episode, don't know where to even start. The solstice is perpetual. Kay. No revivify, totes cool. Ludinus just keeps becoming shittier (no surprise there).

NEW OUTFITS!!! I love them. Imogen's particularly... the leather, the see-through sleeves, the symbolism... I adore her. AND CHETNEY'S TRACK SUIT? he's gonna be a wolf with a hoodie 🥺 so cute. ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THE CORSETS. Thank you, Laura Bailey.

Which brings me back to: Imogen. She's never felt better and she's never felt worse. I want to read the mind of that mind reader so much. She's constantly running away from vulnerability whilst also being a bit shit at hiding how she feels. She's such a bleeding heart, she's been doomed, she's been saved, and she's learned how to grow over the last few years little by little. Now she's standing so much taller, and it's so wonderful to see. I'm just so proud of my little fictional character 🥹 and I want her to reunite with laudna so bad, so everything's a bit better for her.

Which only reminds me of: I miss the dead lady. I miss the dead lady a lot. No, truly, it's just that this new arc has been so much fun and I keep thinking of her and how I just wish she was a part of it. I know I'll be the same with imogen as soon as she's gone, though :(

I feel like our main characters have grown so much together, and it's like we're getting a moment of quiet to actually get to see it. Cause growth often happens very quietly and sometimes we don't necesserally get to see it until after the mess is over. I feel like there's a new-found sense of maturity in them. I think you can see it on Fearne, Ashley's been really great at the little moments, little reactions that she has that are different than before and are also evidence of what she's been through. I love when whimsical/agents-of-chaos-type characters get moments of seriousness and we get to really see what's going on with them. I feel like FRIDA has brought some sense of peace to FCG that I wasn't expecting, and that they weren't expecting, but had certainly been looking for for a bit. It warms my heart, and it sort of seems like there's a bit of a theme there ( or maybe we're all just wandering around on earth, waiting to be understood and find someone that makes us feel at ease). Particularly, though, just like with imodna... It just hits different when you're someone that has dealt with that anger and loneliness for too many years and finally get to find that person that just sort of creates a new meaning of home for you, the sort of thing that makes the noise grow quieter or stress-induced ticking bombs become calmer. It's just a hopeful message to continue to go on by… That regardless of how doomed you feel like you are, there might still be more if you can stick around. Love how Deanna grounds Chetney, too. She's so wonderful and I'm just a sucker for people that are so heartbroken and yet still find it in themselves to love so fiercely. She's amazing and I just want good things for her. I think that right now they could be good for one another, and I love the divorce storyline, obviously.

[noelwho]

Ultimate Chronological Order Imodna Playlist!!!

Hello! I feel like I have to introduce myself ‘cause I’m barely on Tumblr. I’m still learning how to use it, I posted a couple of fanarts and they went really well, so I want to try and make myself a spot in here. My name is Noel (they/them) and I’m a big fan of Critical Role. I started watching a few months ago, with Exandria Unlimited. Once I was done I went ahead and started Campaign 3. I’m currently on episode 49 (I know, I have a lot ahead yet). I also watched the first season of Candela Obscura and a couple of One-Shots.

Today I’m here to talk about the Lesbian Southern Gothic Witches. Earlier this week I started to obsess over a playlist. An Imodna playlist, to be more specific. It started with me listening to one I found on spotify (I will credit below because it’s been a huge inspiration for this project) and I got the urge to make my own. At the beginning it was something chill, something normal…until it was not. Over the course of the last 3 days I haven’t thought about or listened to anything else. I got the idea of making the playlist in chronological order and I started to take it very seriously. I divided their history in 10 different chapters and assigned each song to the correct time period. At first it was just gonna be into chapters, but then I started to put them in order inside the chapters too, and it became very personal. For real, this playlist has been the one and only thing I wanted to talk about for days. Last night I finally finished it. I’ve played it for run tests several times and I think it’s finally ready to see the light (kinda feels like the project of my life even though I only spent a few days working on it).

After all this brainrot it didn’t feel right to just tweet a link to the playlist, I wanted the world to know everything that went through my head in the process of making this. I also don’t have many people around who care about Critical Role, and I thought it was a good opportunity to connect with the fandom. So all of this took me here, to tumblr. All of a sudden it became very clear that this was the perfect place to set my baby free.

There’s some things I wanna make clear before you start reading, the first being the classic: english is not my first language. Sounds like a joke at this point but for real, it’s very likely that this thing is full of grammatical mistakes and I want to apologize in advance (specially about the in/on/at situation, I’ve been having lots of trouble with those for some reason) This is also the first time I do something like this so it may not be perfect. The second thing is that this will obviously be filled with spoilers. In fact I actually haven’t even got to The Scene, I saw it around on Tumblr and Twitter (impossible to avoid that spoiler, but I don’t really care). I’m aware that there’s a lot of Imodna moments that I haven’t seen yet, but I couldn't wait to start this playlist. I don’t know if the episodes I have left to watch will translate into new chapters or into new songs for the chapters I already have but either way, I will keep this post and the playlist updated.

With that being said, welcome to this ride through an unhinged mind. Fasten your seatbelts and enjoy!

The tether scene is one of my favorite ones. I love that metaphor with a passion. That’s why I chose this name for the playlist. With the photo I wanted to make an allusion to the red thread myth given that Laudna herself carries around a spool of red string. I even edited the picture so the hands on the right are slightly gray like Laudna’s.

There’s not just one specific vibe to this playlist, but I find it to be a very calming one, with the exception of some specific moments that we will talk about later. I tried to avoid strong and distracting beats so I could keep it a little ethereal. Lots of acoustic guitar (which I love). I’m not going to talk about every single song because some of them have pretty obvious meanings. Usually the songs aren't a 100% match, but they do have a part to it that speaks to me and to the story on a certain level.

× Imogen and Laudna’s separate lifes ×

At the beginning of the journey that is this playlist, I wanted to introduce the characters. Intertwining their songs, we get to know Imogen and Laudna’s pasts, before they have each other to face the terrors of being witches in a world that doesn’t quite understand them.

Delilah - Florence + The Machine (Laudna)

I sometimes wonder if Marisha has ever listened to this song, because oh my fucking god. I wanted to start the playlist with Abbey, I didn’t because with the intertwining I couldn’t make it fit, but this one is a very good start as well. This song shows perfectly how it must have been being brought back by Delilah and having that power all of a sudden.

Abbey - Mitski (Imogen)

Matilda - Harry Styles (Laudna)

Imogen - Nick Mulvey (Imogen)

Laudna's lullaby - Ginny Di (Laudna)

Time comes in roses - Bess Atwell (Imogen)

The Tradition - Halsey (Laudna)

Burn it down - Daughter (Imogen)

There’s several songs from this album on this playlist. It couldn’t fit better. It reflects perfectly the moment Imogen started to develop her powers. It even refers directly to the way she parts ways with her town (which doesn’t happen for a few chapters but still I felt this one belonged here). Her fear of being a disappointment, her father becoming absent, the feeling of being cursed. It’s all here.

The hanging tree - The hunger games (Laudna)

Still I wait - Anna Leone (Both)

Even with everything they had to go through, they both still wait and cling to hope.

× Imogen and Laudna meet ×

Finally, their paths cross. They experience the feeling of warmth for the first time in a long time. They both feel the need to keep the other one close and begin to appreciate the little things in life, learning how to be taken care of. Goodbye loneliness.

Season of the Witch - Lana Del Rey

I'd like to walk around in your mind - Vashti Bunyan

How important is this song knowing what Imogen can do…

Comfortable Silence - Bella Porter

Without you without them - Boygenius

A hole in the earth - Daughter

That Moon Song - Gregory Alan Isakov

Love brought weight - Old Sea Brigade

That distant shore - Steven Universe

Sick of losing soulmates - Natalie Dawn

I Hear a Symphony - Cody Fry

Sidelines - Phoebe Bridgers

The bug collector - Haley Heyderickx

Sometimes I feel that it’s always Laudna taking care of Imogen, as if she didn't have anything on her own plate. It can't be easy to live with a voice in your head and paranoia. This song shows how Imogen is there to hold Laudna too when it becomes too much.

Look up - Joy Oladokun

If the last one was an Imogen’s POV, this one is totally a Laudna’s POV. Her and her silly little pep talks. “You’re so capable”.

Daylight - Taylor Swift

I love the idea of them learning that life can be good if you find someone to share it with. This song encapsulates that perfectly.

Spell - Dora Jar

I wanted this one to be the last one of the chapter because it introduces the idea of leaving together.

× Imogen and Laudna run away together ×

“Would you run away with me?” They learn what it’s like to have a home that’s not a place, but something entirely new. The past still follows but they’re no longer crushed by it, because they don’t have to sustain it on their own.

Departure - Daughter

Second child, restless child - The Oh Hellos

Just the two of us - Grover Washington, Jr.

I really like to imagine Imodna slice of life scenes when I listen to this song.

Dandelion Wine - Gregory Alan Isakov

Homesick - Dwara, Khotton Palm

Graceland Too - Phoebe Bridgers

When I realized how much of a Laudna's POV this song is, I almost cried.

Telepath - Manchester Orchestra

I really really like Manchester Orchestra, it's one of my favorite bands. I never let go of the chance of spreading them around, and this one is the best song they have. Laudna's POV for sure.

everything i wanted - Billie Eilish

With songs like this one and Intertwined, I wanted to introduce the idea that even though they're definitely better off now that they left the town, that doesn't instantly solve all of their problems. As I said before, the past follows, but they're no longer alone with it.

Savior Complex - Phoebe Bridgers

Intertwined - Dodie

Nothing else matters - Phoebe Bridgers

As long as they're together, nothing else matters.

× You lied ×

Even though I only have a few songs for this precise moment of the story, I thought that it was very important to include their first fight. The gem is broken and Imogen feels betrayed. Laudna is left abandoned and thinks she deserves to be punished for Delilah’s wrongs. We explore jealousy for the first time.

Witches - Daughter

The silence at the end of this instrumental song represents the loneliness that Laudna felt when Imogen left her alone after her incident with Delilah

Landfill - Daughter

There are two possible ways of reading into this one. This is in my opinion a Laudna's POV. She could either be talking to Imogen, expressing her deep rooted desire for a punishment for what she’s done; or to Delilah, alluding to the attachment she has to her own powers (that at least as far as she knows are there because of Briarwood) opposed to the hatred she feels for her and for herself for wanting those powers (this is a theme that they explore later on future chapters)

Are you okay? - Winnetka Bowling League

Afterglow - Taylor Swift

The archer - Taylor Swift

× Laudna’s death ×

Otohan Thull relentlessly kills three members of Bells Hells. A coin is flipped and Laudna is gone, again. What awaits beyond the afterlife? Perhaps a little girl, a monster and a tree.

DVD menu - Phoebe Bridgers

If death’s not exactly DVD menu by Phoebe Bridgers, then someone tell me what’s like because I can’t imagine otherwise. I freaking love how this song connects with Daffodil.

Daffodil - Florence + The Machine

Death with dignity - Sufjan Stevens

Bells in Santa Fe - Halsey

I like to imagine that Laudna didn't appear in Nightmarish Whitestone immediately. Up until this point, she's in a limbo, accepting her own death. Bells in Santa Fe marks the moment she sets foot in that Upside-down kind of world. The constant repetition of “All of this is temporary” is like a mantra for her, the only hope she has of getting through it with her sanity intact is believing that this will also end and she will finally find peace.

Willow Tree March - The paper kiss

Hard times - Ethel Cain

Tether me - Galleaux

With this song and the next one, I wanted to express desperation. We don't get to know in the series how she feels throughout all of this, but I can only imagine how terrifying it must have been. There's a point where anyone would have started begging for help.

Matilda - alt-J

× Imogen’s grief ×

“Is she your favorite?”. Imogen feels deeply guilty for what happened. The possibility of bringing Laudna back is the only thing that’s keeping her from losing it completely. All the regrets, all the words she wishes she said before, all the times she didn’t approached her when she wanted to, come afloat. Grief, disassociation and sorrow.

Words - Storefront Church, Phoebe Bridgers

This song is meant to represent the exact moment of Imogen floating and losing control, with Otohan in her head pushing her to let go.

Goner - Twenty One Pilots

No other song in existence can express better the moment Imogen realize Laudna's gone for good.

Lanterns lit - Son Lux

True Faith - Ashley Johnson

Hurt for me - SYML

Carry you - Novo Amor

My love - Florence + The Machine

Lucky for you - Novo Amor, Gia Margaret

Killer + the sound - Phoebe Bridgers, Noah Gundersen

Should have known better - Sufjan Stevens

Ya'aburnee - Halsey

Show you a body - Haley Heyderickx

Imogen (even Laura) loses hope for a moment during the ritual they do for bringing Laudna back. The end of this song summarize this repeating a lyric over and over (you can clearly see through this playlist how much I love repetition).

× Back together ×

After Bells Hells confront Delilah at the Upside-down-Whitestone of Laudna’s nightmares, Pike manages to bring her back to life. Imogen and her are back hand by hand, and nothing can ever tear them apart again. Here’s where I think something awakes inside them, but they are far from realizing it.

I am the Antichrist to you - Kishi Bashi

Like an angel “fallen from the sky with grace”, Laudna’s back on Imogen’s arms.

Darling - Halsey

This love (Taylor's Version) - Taylor Swift

Now that you're home - Manchester Orchestra

Lose you again - Manchester Orchestra

Halloween - Phoebe Bridgers

But not kiss - Fayer Webster

Like I said, something changes after this. What they’ve been through is not nothing. This song is here to show that something is born deep inside them, on their subconscious far from their reach yet

× Back to Gelvaan ×

Same as with the “You lied” chapter, I felt that this one was important even though I just have one song for it. It just matches perfectly. Imogen and Laudna visit Imogen’s hometown and the place where they met, searching for answers. Old wounds, some closure and an emotionally absent father.

My tears ricochet - Taylor Swift

× Tethered ×

In this chapter the platonic bond is peaking. It takes place right before The Unraveling, giving in to the “Can I kiss you?” phase and becoming romantic. They’ve been through hell and back just to stay together. This is my personal favorite bit of the playlist, everything is extremely intense but not yet explicit.

Tethered - Sleeping at last

I Will - Mitski

Anchor - Alli X

Don't let them see you cry - Manchester Orchestra

Crosses - José González

Quietly - Manchester Orchestra

Francesca - Hozier

Moon song - Phoebe Bridgers

Capital Karma - Manchester Orchestra

Everywhere, everything - Noah Kahan

In a week - Hozier

Monster - King Princess

j's lullaby (darlin' i'd wait for you) - Delaney Bailey

I will follow you into the dark - Miya Folick

I wouldn't ask you - Clairo

× Can I kiss you? ×

Finally, the moment we’ve all been waiting for. The beggining of something new, the next and most logical step of this journey. The platonic becomes romantic and they get to truly explore the feelings they always had, and some novel ones. This is the moment I know less about, but I’ve used my imagination and my own headcanons.

Can I - Genevieve Stokes

I debated a lot whether to put this one at the end of the last chapter or the beginning of this one because I don't know how relevant Laudna's death is up to this point, and there's a huge reference to this in this song. I know for a fact that the Delilah’s plot is not over and things will change, but I couldn't resist the urge to put it in here, given the name of the song and its obvious connection to the chapter.

We'll never have sex - Leith Ross

Wading in Waist-high Water - Fleet Foxes

This is the last time - The National

All my ghosts - Lizzy McAlpine

Prière pour la nuit - Barbara Pravi, November Ultra

Chewing Cotton Wool - The Japanese House

Bandages - Rachel Bobbitt

This is it, this is The Ultimate Chronological Order Imodna Playlist. I don't know if I'm the first one doing this, probably not, I don't know if this has any value to anyone beyond myself, but I had a hell of a lot of fun. If only one person were to read this till the end I would be more than satisfied.

I’ll link here the playlist that started all of this. Massive respect for this person whoever it is, I took lots of the songs from here

Infinite thanks to anyone who gets here or saves my playlist, feel free to respond with any song that you think adds to the story!! Something tells me this isn't the end of my Imodna brainrot so,,,, more things could be on their way (a fanfic, perhaps?).

No idea how to end this so… long live Lesbian Southern Gothic Witches!!!

[lauranthalasah]

Fuck... I'm an idiot, I think I got why so many people felt Orym's nod to Laudna over Bor'Dor so bad.

This is a long one...

See, Orym has been painted as the "good one" by the group, the moraly upstanding, let's say. "The dad friend," the fandom said. And he kinda is, compared to the rest, he has more internal rules, which tend to kindness, respect, etc., and the others clocked it (not saying the other's don't have their own morality, just that Orym seems to have more lines he will object to be crossed).

For a long time, his actions proved this side of him to the Bell's Hells, but what is more important, I think... they start relying on it! Many PCs had done that, from EXU, to C3, to even guest players, somebody said something in the lines of "I look at Orym, if Orym it's okay with it, then I'm good" (I think it was a guess star). The group relaxed over their own process of decision making because they started counting on Orym to call them out if they went too far!

The key thing is... Orym never asked for it! As a mom friend, let me tell you... it's frustrating as hell to have to "parent" people who are my age or older, I do it only because I love them, and I don't want them to die! And Orym showed us his frustration with them a long time ago!! Remember when they all were rising hands over who thought they would all try to kill each other? Remember how Orym just stand up and fucking left?! That's what you do when you are tired of trying to be the voice of reason in a group in which at least four of them are older than you and the other two are adults as well! Hell! Ashton noticed it!

Orym never asked for that position, no one ever does, you just fucking fell into it, and then you care too much for the idiots you call friends... even if you want to killed them yourself half of the time (that's me). In fact, Orym reaaaaly doesn't want to be any kind of leader, not even a "moral" one, but he keeps falling into Chaotic groups, sorry man!

Now, something else the group as a whole fails to realize in its full meaning is that Orym is a soldier in a mission. He has always been, and they know it, intellectually, but they failed to understand the implications of it. Fearne understands Orym, that's why she goes to him when she herself has doubts over Imogen, because she knows what Orym did with Dorian, so she knows Orym must be thinking some strategies just in case, and I'm not sure if she goes to him only because she is worried or also because she wants to show him her support, whatever it is... it's one of the best shows of not only that Fearne loves Orym, but that she actually understands him more than one could think. But Bell's Hells don't have the knowledge that Fearne does, they don't know how lethality serious Orym can get, how he will do things he hates because he things they must be done, they've seen glimpses, but Fearne saw it in all its cold steadfastness when Orym pulled his sword on Dorian, she knows, the rest are going to find out little by little.

So we have Orym trying, for a long time, to understand the enemy, what motivates the members of the Ruby Vanguard, trying to keep seeing them as people, not just "enemies." But he also recognized that he can not be impartial with them. We saw how he left another "should gods live or not" discussion because he is tired of it. Even if he thought (which he doesn't) that all the Gods should died he would not help the Ruby Vanguard, they will always be his enemies. He has been saying it is personal to him since his chat with Chetney. The philosophical conundrum, it's in the end, pointless to him, if he can stop the Ruby Vanguard he will, just for what they did to his people. And even with this as a known factor... he still tried to understand the members of the RV, they were people who have been hurt, even after they killed him, Fearne, and Laudna, Orym still tried to keep that openess of mind and heart.

Until Bor'Dor.

Bor'Dor attacking them after they offered him kindness and friendship, but even worse, I think... it was Bor'Dor attacking Prysm and Deni$e, who had nothing to do with Bell's Hells and their attack to the RV, just because they were there, and he wanted to hurt Ash, Laudna, and Orym. That proved to Orym once and for all that the RV were too dangerous, too cruel in the pursuit of their goals, simply put... they don't care how many innocent people they have to kill to reach their objective. At that moment, Orym went to war, at that moment he became completely the soldier he could be. At that moment, he thought, "He has to die".

And in the middle of this storm we have Laudna on her own, and she looks up, she looks at Orym, hopping he will maybe stop her, the friend that has always stop them from going too far, and she doesn't realize that what she sees is an aspect of her friend she hasn't fully met yet, and because she is used to rely on his instincts over this things... she lets herself go.

So later, when things get a bit calmer, it kinda feels like a betrayal, doesn't it? Why? Why does the friend who always stops us from doing stupid things didn't stop me?! WHY? And the answer is, because he couldn't stop himself.

He didn't betray Laudna, he fails her in the rol SHE had assigned HIM, now they will have to rework their friendship.

This moment weighs in the three of them, Ashton, too. It's obvious in the way he and Orym tell Laudna to take a moment for her. They are trying to help her now. Nothing changes what happened, though.

This is going to be interesting because it's clear that that aspect of Orym's personality, the cold soldier, is quite on the surface now. He is angry, really angry, angry enough that he might not have the strength to keep being the "dad friend", because he might be too focused on keeping himself at bay to be the person who helps the others to do that as well. Like I think he will keep trying to be there for his friends, but his own mental and emotional state makes him less reliable to what the group is used to.

[golden-flute]

No one asked for my opinion on The Sun and the Star, but I’ve been thinking of nothing else since I finished the book, and I have to write my thoughts or I will explode, lol.

Fair warning: Spoilers and long-ass thought dump ahead.

Gif Originally posted by riptides

On the Themes

I picked out a few different themes that I found carried through the book:

Self-acceptance

Living with trauma

Embracing change

What healing looks like

I thought they were brilliantly approached because there was a lot of nuance for each theme. Particularly when you consider that these are pretty heavy topics for middle-reader age groups!

The biggest theme directly relating to Nico was this idea that it's possible to embrace your trauma, to accept it, and to grow around it. In his case, it's literal, with the Cocoa Puffs hanging around him now like a little parade of Walmart Ghibli Sootballs, lol.

I think that Nico was working through his trauma well before he ever heard the prophecy. The fact that he was able to accept his darkness so easily once Nyx forced him to confront it was more a mark of how far he'd already progressed than it was a big moment where he was suddenly magically healed from all of his baggage. The entire purpose of the Cocoa Puffs was to act as a physical representation of Nico's existing trauma. They will always be a part of him, but they don't define him. He's simply accepted them and freed himself from them without avoiding the fact that they'll still be there. That's such a healthy place to be, particularly because I think a lot of people tend to fall into the same trap of toxic positivity that Will did....

Many people who are natural healers and problem-solvers often fail to realize that being healed doesn't always mean that pain has totally been eradicated, hurray. In their minds, there's always some way to fix broken people. And I think that's why Will's conversation with Persephone was so important for his growth. I think he always saw Nico as someone who needed to be fixed, and to Will, that meant that Nico must hide from his trauma, or ignore it. Will's story arc centered around his acceptance that he can't (and shouldn't) always try to heal people "his way." With Nico, he had to get on his level, see him, and accept his pain. I've known people in my life who tend to avoid negative emotions because they think it's totally bad. But hiding from the pain can often make it worse. Darkness only grows stronger in the shadows, after all.

Nico and Will's internal journeys were two sides of the same coin in that respect. I loved it. Nico was ready to accept his trauma, but in a way, Will had to accept it too.

By the time they reach Nyx, these internal struggles had been mostly resolved and simply need to have their big final moment to totally hit home. But there's another kind-of-subtle-but-also-not theme for Nyx that ingeniously ties into the idea of questioning gender and sexuality. Nyx sees things as black and white. Even her own children, who are more than their labels, have to fit into these perfect molds in her mind. She's the BBEG because she struggles to change or to accept others changing around her. Talk about a heavy topic, right? But then at the end of the book, this idea of change is also beautifully encapsulated in Nico and Piper's discussion about sexuality labels. Particularly from Piper's perspective, since she's still figuring herself out and just going with what feels right in the moment. People are beautifully complex creatures who are capable of being something new every day.

On Characterization

Over the years, I've discovered that I gravitate toward the reformed, darker characters--the gloomy cinnamon rolls, if you will. Nico. Laudna and Caleb from Critical Role. Hunter in the Owl House. Zuko. Kaladin from the Stormlight Archives. Riku from Kingdom Hearts. So on and so forth. Something about their stories is so compelling to me. Perhaps seeing them overcome their own trials is a symbol that light comes after darkness, which is a message I have clung to my entire life, because it gives me hope for myself. And that’s exactly one of the messages I got from TSATS. This time, it was Nico’s turn for a reprieve from his trauma.

Y'all. Nico's a fucking NERD. The moment we met him as a little kid, he was talking everyone's ears off about Mythomagic, and he revealed he had a pirate phase and... yeah, he's just a nerd. His carefree personality took a huge nosedive after Bianca was killed, and then he became this unrecognizable dark creature of vengeance. I know some folks felt that he was really out of character in TSATS, but I find the shift just harkens back to the themes of change. Nico's transforming before our eyes, guys. Though Apollo's series and into TSATS, he's come to a place of peace where he could let go of his anger and his darkness... or at least accept them. And that's given him the space he needed to kind of get back on an even keel. He's finally able to return to his natural progression as a hyperactive dork. That's what we saw in TSATS and I loved it so much for him.

I found Will's progression really interesting as well. He's always been seen as the intrepid healer with a sometimes-literal glowing halo around him. In this story, the tables were turned and he had to accept that he needed support sometimes too. But more than that, this is the first time we've really gotten inside Will's head. We've only ever really seen him from the perspective of Nico (his admirer) and Apollo (his affectionate father). But this time, we were able to get Will's thoughts, and he's... not as perfect as we expected. And I love it. No one is perfect, and I think that in the absence of more information on Will, people sort of developed headcanons of him that understandably made the TSATS version of him a bit jarring. But if he were this perfect pariah of a character, that would hardly be interesting. I really enjoyed that in the first half, he spent so much time complaining about the Underworld, because it just meant there were some lessons for him to learn as well. He's complex, just like the rest of the PJO cast.

Other Incongruent Thoughts

Guys, I'm dead. When we finally heard the fated prophecy, I was... really underwhelmed. It didn't feel like it was literarily as impressive in the same way the other prophecies had been. It just... wasn't very good poetry. But then Dionysus criticized the rhyme structure and called it "a bit forced" and I was like "Hang on..." Come to find out, Hades made up the prophecy to get Nico to go save Bob! Can you just imagine Hades sitting at a desk, surrounded by crumpled pieces of paper, writing bad poetry that's convincing enough to get Nico off his butt and into Tartarus? I'm deceased.

The reunion between Nico, Maria, and Bianca BROKE me, y'all. I was full-on sobbing and my eyes were swollen this morning when I woke up. I was confused by how they were there, since past books said that they'd "moved on," insinuating they'd tried for rebirth. But I saw another post someone made about how Hades (or Bianca?) mentioned that they were the barest of essences remaining. I'm not saying it very well, but it made a lot more sense, and I hadn't caught that insinuation in my read-through. But I absolutely loved that we didn't get this reunion until after Nico had already accepted his trauma. If this meeting had come before, I'm sure he would have fought to "save" his mom and sister--I mean, he even says it in the book. But by that point, all he needed was to say his piece and get some closure, and that was enough for him. It was a mark of how much he's grown, and I just... *chef's kiss*

I love Hades. He's genuinely a good dad. Well... sort of. Maybe not at the beginning of PJO. But he, too, is changing his ways and taking more of an interest in his children. Or at least Nico. I wonder if we'll ever get more Hazel/Hades content? But Nico pretty much confirmed that Hades was around when he was a kid, and Hazel said the same thing in a previous book, which is more than pretty much every other demigod can say, so there you go. By Olympian standards, Hades deserves that #1 Dad mug.

I was really surprised that it took over half the book for Nico and Will to make it to Tartarus! Don't get me wrong, there was still plenty going on, but I was so used to the idea of Percy and Annabeth dropping in at chapter 2, it surprised me!

Anyone else peep the really big typo on page 401 of the US hardcover? "My mother is Bianca di Angelo, and she loved me and my sister." I stared at that for a long time last night wondering if I was going crazy, lolol. From what I've heard, the typo has already been fixed on the kindle version of the book, but those of us with physical copies have got the OG mistake. Whoops, lol!

I'm having a hard time discerning if the "'Dam it,' said Nico." on page 352 is a typo or not, for the pure and simple reason that there were so many dam jokes in PJO. And somewhere else in the book, Nico actually says "Damn," so... was it a typo? The 'dam' joke didn't really have a purpose for being there, and it wasn't repeated later, so I feel more like it might have been another typo?

We got a little Percy and Annabeth action! And Sally and Estelle! I have to admit, I was a little disappointed that Percy and Annabeth had already forgotten about Bob. Especially since Percy's whole growth in the House of Hades was to realize how many people he'd left behind. I never expected them to join Nico and Will in their Tartarus journey, but they apparently brushed him off so fast I got whiplash! What was that about? I wonder if we'll get more on that in the short story that comes out later this year?

We got a little mention of Damasen in this story as well, and obviously if he hasn't regenerated yet, there wasn't much they could do for him. But... I'm surprised that Percy and Annabeth didn't mention him or ask Nico to keep an eye out for him as well because he was there at the Doors of Death, making the same sacrifice as Bob. Will there be another Tartarus rescue mission in the future? Nemesis told Nico that any future journies into Tartarus would be unsuccessful. While I feel like it's unlikely we'll get any more Tartarus field trips, those little asides made me wonder if Rick Riordan's got more ideas floating around that he wanted to leave open for later, just in case.

They used the words gay, bisexual, and lesbian! I don't think this book series has ever done that before! I have a sneaking suspicion that this was part of Mark's contribution to the book. RR usually tends to talk around those words--he'll make it obvious, like when Apollo talked about his love for Hyacinthus, but I don't think Apollo ever actually used the word bisexual to describe himself (correct me if I'm wrong). I think that it was a really good step forward for children's literature. If you're going in, go all in, you know?

Lil Nas X made an unbelievable appearance! Lol! Though I have to admit, the inconsistency of the timeline of references sometimes gets me. Like many books ago, some character probably dropped a reference from ten years ago, and a year or two in book time, we get a Montero reference. Like, it's a small nitpick, but that inconsistency always pulls me out of the story a bit. Yeah, you heard right--I'm totally fine with the issues everyone else had with the books, but the weird timeline of references messes with me, lol. That's where I draw the line! That's not the say the Lil Nas X reference wasn't spectacular, though, lol.

Do I... like Mr. D now? I love Dionysus from the mythologies, but Mr. D was always so... blegh. But he's like legit a decent person to Nico. He shared his popcorn! That. Was. HUGE. Hahaha.

We finally got the full scoop on Nico's first trip to Tartarus!

The nickname "Night-Light" is endlessly adorable. And then Will ruins it by turning around and calling Nico "Death Boy" lol.

The trogs were never my favorite mythological creature ever, but they grew on me in this story.

So... Menoetes and Geryon, huh? Menyon? Geroetes? What's our ship name? Lol.

Will having the hots for Persephone was not on my bingo card, lol! I did really enjoy their talk, though. It really set up Will's character arc very nicely. And I loved that Persephone seems to be taking a leaf out of Hades' book and trying to be a bit kinder towards her stepchildren. It's not their fault, you know?

I'm seeing a lot of reactions to Nico's coming out story. I agree, that's one part I felt was a little bit forced. Introverted people can have moments where they're feeling brave and don't mind an audience (Hi, I'm exhibit A), I wouldn't say it's out of character per se. But it was a little bit... shall we say out of context? Since we didn't get the actual scene, but Nico and Will's recollection of it?

I really liked Gorgyra. The random chapters of stories from Nico and Will kind of jarred me a bit, but I think they were a nice touch, but would have been too much if they'd all been told chronologically. I agree with Rick and Mark's decision to split those up.

Amphithemis was a trip! I wish we could have lingered a bit more on Nico being upset at Will for tricking him away. I was glad that Nico at least asked Hades to free Amphithemis.

I saw some complaints that Nico and Will were super cringey around one another. To that, and as someone who's ace, I say... most couples are cringey around each other, particularly young couples. Nico and Will are still feeling out their relationship, and they don't have the years of friendship that Percy and Annabeth had that made their relationship so easygoing. I think Nico and Will's relationship is a bit more realistic in terms of first loves.

I loved the frank conversations about PTSD. I eat stuff like that up, because when I read it, I can just imagine someone else who really needs that sort of representation reading this book and finding comfort in characters like them.

And I'm literally out of space. I had no idea Tumblr had a character limit, but I hit it, lol. But if you got this far, thanks for reading!