#I have stuff I wanna get out of my head
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ugh I dont wanna study I wanna draw
#I wanna have the time to make some short comics to tell tiny stories#I like doing that#I have stuff I wanna get out of my head
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I SWEAR CELEBI'S THINGY IS COMING SOON BUT I REALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ALRIGHT
yeaah... future trio got me too...
and Darkrai is there too, because of course he is.
hey look i drew a cute Drifloon :D
...ignore the rest
whatever started at Darkrai doodles ended in brainrot of future trio + darkrai and I'm blaming @scribz-ag24 for this
#Can you believe between the first pic and the 4th pic is only a week inbetween. I sure can't but like why did I mirror the pose...#ON ACCIDENT??? Everytime I look at the two Grovyles I'm like... how... how did they end up so differently???#also probably blaming @cozybells as well for this but I really fear tagging people so I'm just letting y'all know in the tags because#I do wanna let everyone know who inspired me when someone did <333 better get running [you know who you are!!!!] DusnoirXDarkrai is next...#also: upon seeing scribz-ag24's art my brain said: You need to color too! ah yeah that went well with the doodle batch#I really hope you're able to read everything with how messy I can write sometimes. If not please let me know and I'll add sth in this post!#Also the doodle batch was the first thing I drew so well... never drew dusknoir before and grovyle once i think...#please go easy on me I have yet to explore the relationship between literally everyone😭 and I have no idea what I‘m doing and I'm a little#lost I normally only draw King Boo or Darkrai but I'm sure scribz-ag24 sprinkling in bits of Darkrai got me in love with the future trio to#grovyle#future trio#celebi#darkrai#dusknoir#pmd hero#pokemon#drifloon#totodile#my art#my stuff#tagas friend spoiler#pmd#pokemon mystery dungeon#IS THERE A SHIP NAME FOR FUTURE TRIO... there must be. ...oh... is it just...#futuretrioshipping#i feel sooo stupid rn.#also everytime i drew darkrai i had evil spiteful bastard in mind (except for the one with an arrow pointing out he's redeemed) but i think#i literally mixed every possible version of him in my head so got absolutely no clue what i'm doing :D#anyways i hope you enjoyed this and thanks for reading through my ramblings! Have such a wonderful rest of the day yippiee <333#pmd2
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in daniel matthews' case, it takes a village
#dont tag as me / me irl#daniel matthews#saw#saw ii#saw 2#saw movies#saw fanart#saw franchise#sawposting#saw ii fanart#saw series#daniel matthews fanart#now my thoughts;#fic linked isnt the necessary insp for the piece but i liked the quote#so just wanted to credit it and also the fic is really awesome :3#just had this kind of pose/composition in my head for a while; wanted to get it out#i have a lot more daniel stuff in the works and stuff on the back burner !#its just indulgent so its a little embarrassing and i wanna post dump it all#some of which i have already posted to my other blog
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Two young knights
#TeuTemp sketch :)#shoutout to the like two teutemp fans out there they are so cute#Love the few interactions they have in the manga wish there was more 😔#be the character interaction you want to see in the world#I wanna do more fanart of these two I love em#me: I hate armor so much#also me: continues to draw exclusively fantasy medieval characters#everyone look at my two little knight bois#I like to imagine sometimes they get to act like kids during trade markets and stuff and run around looking at things and eating sweets#fated to end in tragedy :)#the dialogue in my head was like#Gilbert: the hell are you lookin at?!#Gabriel: be nice Gil ^^#I’ve seen so many names for Knights Templar#I like Gabriel and Hadrian and also maybe Salomon the most#historical hetalia#hetalia fanart#hetalia#teutemp#aph teutonic knights#aph knights templar#hws prussia#aph prussia#hws knights templar#gilbert beilschmidt#digital art#my art#commissions open#artists on tumblr#fanart
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LOVE LOSES !!!!!!!!!!!!
#sorry the idea of most of sonics rivals having a crush on him while sonic himself doesnt know or just doesnt care is really funny to me#anyway idk how i feel about how this looks i jusst kinda rushed it out to get it out of my head#wihtout caring about it looking perfect#this is what i was talking about earlier btw.#when i said i wasgonna try to draw something for valentines but its not actual serious ship art#im a little late . but its still the 14th somewhere im sure#sonic the hedgehog#sth#shadow the hedgehog#knuckles the echidna#jet the hawk#am i allowed to tag the ships if theyre one sided will people get annoyed with me if i do that#whatever im doing it anyway. at the very least so people who dont wanna see ship stuff can filter it out#sonadow#sonknux#sonjet#my art#to be completely honest i dont feel anywhere near as strongly about the idea of shadow liking sonic as i do knuckles and jet liking sonic#but he gets to be included because i cant just make a joke about sonics rivals without including shadow
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gojo would kill your work husband. but if he were the work husband, that's a different story
REAL!! he’s such a hypocrite because if someone mentioned you had a work husband, his entire world would stop and he wold devise the absolute worst plans to make sure that your co-worker, everyone at your job, and everyone in the next building over knew that he was happily committed to you
but if he is the work husband, he’s very........ dutiful in his role. there’s a loose office/lawyer au in my head where satoru is your secretary, and for all intents and purposes, your personal assistant, and he’s good at his job, but mostly because he considers his job to be pleasing you. he has coffee for you when you arrive, he moves your schedule around without you asking, he has answers to questions before you can even ask them, he has fresh flowers on your desk weekly, pokes into your meetings to pretend to hand you a file that’s really just maybe a single document in a manilla folder with candy on top of it—he’s made himself your business, your partner; he’s made himself irreplaceable, and he loves to remind everybody of that fact.
he’s also extremely loyal. sure, he could day a week’s worth of work done in about a day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll just use his talents for anybody. he’s your secretary, so he’s at your beck and call, and everyone knows it. they know he’s the best, but also that he’s off limits—not because you won’t share him, but because satoru won’t let himself be shared.
he also extends his duties beyond work, of course. when he hands you a print out of your schedule for the day and you’re confused by the three-hour block of time you have in the middle of the day, satoru just helps you shrug your coat of your shoulders and smiles, “that’s for the lunch date you have with me, of course!” hanging up your coat in your closet for you, “i’m paying, see you soon, sweets.” and because you’re great at your job, and satoru helps you be great, nobody really questions when the two of you have time for a 13-course tasting menu at 1pm on a tuesday afternoon. and if they did, all satoru would say that you two had a lovely date
#anonymous#he's like donna from suits but worse because he's like if harvey were donna LOL#i have soooooo much to say about him#he doesn't really Have to work he's a nepotism baby supreme#but he met you maybe in undergrad? and he's been obsessed w you since#he knows youre a workaholic so he's dutifully sat by your side all these years through college through grad/professional school#and when you told him you got to hire your own assistant he was the very first applicant#because getting paid to spend his days with you and take care of you? he was already doing that for free might as well make it official#everyone in the office knows satoru loves you except you honestly#he probably has his own masters/JD but elects to be your assistant anyway bc that's so much more fun#what he Really wants to be a househusband but first he's gotta ask you out and propose and all that good stuff (cue him rolling his eyes#and going on about formalities and boring systems and blah blah blah)#also in the office au in my head: nanami (also senior partner) higuruma ofc <3 beloved (managing partner) and TOJI!#WALK WITH ME!#its honestly probably satoru's influence that gets toji into law... as someone who so feverently broke it in the past#idk maybe there's a megumi situation that makes gojo be like yk if ur this good at skirting/breaking the law youd probably be half decent#at enforcing it... or at least helping other people get around it too#and so lawyer toji is born#does he screw around w the rich people who r stupid w their money? absolutely#but you nanami and higuruma just let it be bc he brings in those settlements better than anybody else....#hmmm... i kinda wanna make megumi somebody's associate but also..... yuuta.....#i think i just like sticking yuuta in a tie if im being real#but anyway... satoru is your Work Husband and everyone knows he wants to be your real husband#but they just let it slide bc rumour has it even tho hes just a secretary hes got equity in the firm?? and besides that his heart eyes give#away his hopeless devotion from a mile away#the day you actually start seeing somebody outside of work... oh theyre in for Trouble#satoru x reader#him dragging you out of ur office late at night and u protesting so he just. puts u over his shoulder#and ur telling him to let u down but he's insisting u go home and then nanami pops out of his office#and ur like wait nanami this isnt what it looks like but he's so dead in the eyes when he just sighs
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Turns out Sunlit Trail isn't quite done just yet, so after all that they just send you to a dead end 😂
#rain world#comic#rw chasing wind#sunlit Trail#Hunter#Art#Chasing wind spoilers#I can't imagine anyone filters that tag but just in case sksksks#ANYWAYS turns out mod is way better than I expected and it's super well made.#So far made the trip as hunter (first time) then riv and now working on arti.#For arti I realized that howling rifts led to sub and sub led to dar shore so I was like sweet! A shortcut!#Now imagine for a sec trying to get through a parkcore + miros bird gauntlet with a corpse and a worm within 5 cycles#before the scav ran out of karma and you were stuck inside forever. Yeah#Besides that tho I've been messing around and been very tenderly modding the game.#Turns out you can have a bit of fun with most sprites without too much effort by simply cloning the MSC mod in your files#Then changing the copy's mod info so it doesn't clash and simply swapping images out for whatever you want#As long as you have the sprite name you can do this. You can also change region names and decals and music all sorts of stuff.#In short I've been brewing a custom mod for a friend to make her suffer as much as possible <3#Thanks to a buddy on the rw server for showing me that trick btw lol. The best cesspool I've ever participated in#Oh before I forget- the symbol on CW's head is completely made up. They just looked so... Bald.#Tbh I wasn't expecting their personality to be so... bright? Most interpretations make them kinda solemn and gloomy#But nah this CW is what NSH should've been 100%. I like them. Not gonna spoil too much but their situation is somehow so... chill.#Still bad tho!#Other fun news! There's a scammer going around on discord that's basically like ''bad news I reported you for fraud''#And they're getting a lot of people. My buddy that owned my home server got hit and we lost everything. It's all OK tho nobody was hurt#I keep trying to ask them questions on my alts but they're ignoring me... I kinda wanna bait them into doing the scam with me#to see how far I get before they catch on 😜#Wasting a scammer's time is never a waste of time#Ah I had more to say but I reached my tag max. Till next time- hopefully my animation project will be done by then!
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take me in your tender arms, roll me in the dirt
Sypnosis: It's not love, but Gage will take what he can (and remain in deep denial).
spotify play lover's dream by saints amongst sinners
[title is from cover me in roses in holden laurence]
word count: 1.3k
“Fuck, this party is boring,” They sigh, leaning on the counter and taking a swig of their beer. They were in the kitchen of some house party, the sound of some Spotify EDM playlist thumping in the background.
Gage glanced over, peeling away at the sticker of some off-brand beer, condensation dripping down his hands. “Yeah,” He chuckled, eyes darting to them, “We should’ve known the minute we heard this music. It’s downright tragic.” His eyes follow the curve of their smirk, searching for approval.
‘Down, boy. Your tail is practically wagging.’
Gage quickly averts his eyes, paying close attention to the way the ceiling light hits his beer bottle. He could barely look in their eyes most of the time, breathtakingly beautiful and full of promises. But now, when they were dressed in some tight top that left little to the imagination and showed just enough skin to leave him craving for more, Gage feared bursting into flames if he looked at them too long.
“I thought that parties now would be better than those booze-fests in high school but God,” They sigh, running a hand through their hair, “This is somehow worse. It smells like sex and artificial fruits everywhere.”
“That’s the vapes, I think. All the rage nowadays.”
They wrinkle their nose, “Fuck, that must be it. God, I can’t believe I got dressed for nothing.”
“I mean you look good,” He nervously forces out, taking a swig of his beer to fuel his confidence, “And maybe I could, uh, give that outfit the attention it deserves. Could think of a few ways to make it worth your while. Upstairs, maybe.”
They return the look with a surreptitious smile and throw back a sip of their own beer, letting the question linger in the stale, suddenly too-quiet kitchen. “Yeah? And just what do you intend to do to me upstairs, mister?”
It’s a game they play, sometimes at a frat party, sometimes when they message him in the middle of the night to come over, and they spend the hour making “small talk” before they inevitably end up in bed again. Always playing coy, dancing around what they really wanted. Teasing him and pushing him until he took the final step. It made Gage’s head spin.
“Oh? You want me to say it here? In the kitchen?” He feigns disbelief, placing his beer bottle down, placing it on his chest in astonishment, “You absolute heathen!”
Mocking, joking, in an attempt to break the blatantly brewing sexual tension.
He’s still learning to get over his people-pleasing propensities, learning to ask for what he wants directly and accepting the consequences. But it’s a work in progress, and when faced with his friends-with-benefits that he’s not in love with, his resolve crumbles and all he knows is to beat around the bush, to laugh off any sense of intimacy between them, to hide any semblance of yearning on his part.
“Hmm,” They smile, enigmatic as the Mona Lisa. Putting down their beer and moving to face him, they crowd him against the countertop, pressing their barely covered chest to his, eyes slowly dragging up, lingering, very pointedly, on his lips before meeting his gaze, “Me? A heathen? You’re the one who’s been staring at me all evening, don’t think I haven’t noticed.” The words whispered against his lips, softly, their lips grazing against his for the briefest of seconds before pulling away, like it was a secret only for the both of them.
Cause at the end of the day, that was all it was, wasn’t it? They were each other's dirty secret, whispered under the loud music of a frat party, said in the silent looks sent across the room. And Gage was fine with that, really, he was. The physical satisfaction of feeling them close to him, sending waves and waves of pleasure coursing through him, sneaking out of their room even before the sun had risen, hiding away in closets and watching them flirt with other people, just for him to end up in their bed again. He was absolutely ok with that.
That’s what he tells himself, at least, as he surges forward, closing the distance between them with one hand cupping their face, the other dropping down to their waist, removing any semblance of space between them.
They move in tandem, lips moulding and bodies pushing against each other. God, they tasted good, like beer and passion and wanton lust. He was addicted to the taste, addicted to them, their hands roaming his body, their body grinding against his. An erotic display of bodies moving against each other, grasping desperately where they could, tiny gasps and moans entirely too inappropriate for the back of some frat boy’s kitchen.
They part, eyes still closed, his lips desperately chasing theirs. “Shall we, uh, adjourn to the bedroom, my liege?” Even now, even when they’ve made clear their desires, will he continue to hide the hopeless pining of his heart. Because this isn’t what he wants, not really, no matter how much he lies to himself, tells himself otherwise.
He wants to kiss them because he wants to, wants to kiss them over morning breakfast, wants to be greeted with their sweet smile when he comes home from work, wants to learn the quiet, intimate, inconsequential details of their everyday life, wants to become so intertwined with them that he teetered on the very edge of losing himself.
Most importantly, he wanted them to love him the way he loves them.
But that’s for another night.
For now, he revels in their breathless chuckle, letting them pull him through the throngs of drunkards into some random’s bedroom. There, they push him onto the bed, grinning deviously as he lets out a quiet oof before climbing on top of him and continuing their heated kiss. His hands move to tug at their hair, swallowing the groan that falls from their lips while they move to slip under his shirt, cold hands against his warm body making him shudder.
“Watch the hands,” He breathlessly warns as they part, even as he quickly pushes his sweater over his shirt, “Oh- fuck- wait, my sweater uh- a little help please?” They snort, breaking the mood momentarily as they carefully manoeuvre his sweater over his head.
“Ok, ok quit laughing, asshole,” He complains, tugging at the hem of their tight shirt, “C’mon, off. S’not fair I’m the only half-dressed one here.”
“Wait.” They mutter, moving their head down to press a light kiss to his neck, forcing a gasp through Gage’s lips. They continue their assault on him, pressing soft kisses all over his body, marking him, smiling against his soft body as he falls apart under their ministrations.
And maybe one day, Gage will ruin this perfectly good arrangement, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week. But for now? For tonight? When they’re worshipping him like this, sweet praises falling from those kiss-bruised lips? When their hands are pressed against his sweaty body? Gage will tell himself that maybe, just maybe, they feel the same way he does, that they want him the way he does.
That maybe their heart also threatens to burst when they hear him laugh, that they search for him in every room without even meaning to. That every joke they tell is just to hear him laugh, that every love song seems to have that one specific line that so perfectly describes him, that they have a secret playlist for him that they listen to in the dead of night. That every kiss they press to his body is an admission of love, of adoration for his entire being.
He lets himself forget, momentarily, that this is all a dream, that in the morning (if they even stayed that long) this would be over; that the love and ecstasy he feels is only a means to an end for them, a temporary distraction for his aching heart.
For tonight, he forgets.
#reverie audios#gage reverie audios#when i said i couldnt get gage out of my head....#I MEANT IT#i hate when they have angst but I also EAT THAT SHIT UP!!!#also i was gna post on ao3 but I understand the tagging system even less then tumblr#also ALSO i made a playlist of gage in his pining era and hell yeah u bet do i wanna know os there#silly writing stuff: reverie edition#yapping about gage#my humble offerings
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In other news:
#/vpos#ouhhhHHHHHHHHHHGHGHGGGGHHHFHGHDHDJHDJFBFBXHDBDHSGCHDBGDDHHDHDXJSNXHDNHDHSGJFNFNEHSBHRGXJBFSGXBFJDDG#im just#sitting doing nothing driving myself INSANE abt my . husbannbsds......#im supposed to rping rn dammit-#i just need to go bonkers for a moment#hhhGSJSGSKFHENYXHEKDNSMYEUEGEBSKSBKDHWNRHRBCUSBXKSHJEYWJNWNSHDKDBXHSHDUGESHGEUWSNXBXVXJDEBSJSYHWEBDCNHCBCKBDJENSKXSYEJWJWHIESHHFNKWYSOEHEBDU#BSHAJEHEKEEUDYEIBEDKBXKCBDUWHDKEJWKDHRJHSNCDJEIFBSHDNEKDBNEEDSDJHENDBKDCTHEMJSHDJHENDKSHSHCRKNETOSNDHDKDNDFUCKHSHDKSBDSHGDKSMEKDHDKSHSTUPIDJ#UAHAGAGSHSGDJSHJDJDKDJDKFDKDCKDH#IM#S O FUKFINFF UNWEELLLLLLL#IM . BLOWING UP AUAHAHAGHGSJH#I LOVE TH EY#HHHHHHHH#i wanna sit on Sols lap and hug him and lay on him and listen to his inner workings whirr#AND a lso kiss the life outta him and!! kiss down his arms and the palms of all his hands and#ohh i havent even tried kissing his sun pad yet i gotta do that-#hhhhhhhghfh and fuckinbbc. N0vas sona.... mmngngjhnh m o f f#i know we're like the same height but .. smol...... hold and hug#i need to cuddle the creature so bad on GOD theyd be a better cuddle buddy than my dinky little pillows AUHG#hhgshg stuff my face in his flufffffffffhhgghgghhhhggggggggggggg#hhhsgah and you KNOW mal is still bouncing around in my head like a dvd player screen saver OUGH#i have a great need to sit in bed with him laying back and resting on me while i hold him and gently mess with his rays HEL P ME#i need to wake up in the morning and not be able to get out of bed only cuz hes holding on to me and keeping me there for cuddles#i need to sit on my kitchen counter with him in front of me so i can hold his p retty face and pepper him with sleepy morning kisses#o h myg od im so normal about them can you tell#malware my beloved#N0va my beloved#Solaris my beloved#storm loses it
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so I had the idea for something like this a while ago, but last night I walked in on my sister watching those compilations of stuff just. getting crushed in a crusher and I knew what I had to do.
#my art#mission to zyxx#horsehat#AJ-2884#I’m still working out how I wanna draw the crew. def a combination of what i had in my head already#and the wonderful cool stuff that people in the fandom have made#I’m not married to any of these designs yet I just had to get this out there
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I have a scene in my head that I wanna explore in my truce au but I have to draw so much first to get there so here are scribbly contextless doodles in the meantime
#UTDR#UTMV#Charlie Stuff#This is just to get it out of my head because I wanna draw it so bad!!!#I swear I’m gonna post the start of it soon I’m almost finished#I feel like it looks much worse without context but you’ll just have to trust me#You know things are serious when you can see Dust’s face and (what’s left of) Killer’s eyelights
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all i have been able to think about today is that silly little knife game where you stab the spots between your fingers and try not to hurt yourself and how that silly little game is SO horrorkiller. i cant explain it it bothers me so much that i cant explain it but it just does its so them
they play it when theyre bored. because when in doubt bodily mutilation and the risk of hurt and pain is always an appealing one. and when i mean they i just mean killer because horror wouldn't wanna just hurt himself on the fly like that for funsies. he likes to see others hurt because hahaha FINALLY some damn entertainment!!! but hurting himself???? nononnno hes already got enough body pain as it is oh and killer has already grabbed his hand and started playing (and now horror can't back out because killer's got him sucked in the game)
they sing the silly little song. horror has all his fingers the knife goes chop chop chop if killer misses the spaces in between horror's fingers will come off! and they are both enraptured and both captured in this childishly morbid game. it's so anticipatory because they both know its all up to killer to decide if horror gets hurt. hes more than precise enough to keep the game going for hours long without ever hitting horror but would he want to keep it going for that long? horror doesn't know how long killer would want to wait before getting to see him react to getting hurt
and killer does eventually do it even after theyre sung the song over and over countless times and tried different harmonies and finally killer decides to end this little song and dance and stab into horror's hand. maybe he decides to do a finger. maybe the palm if he really wants to piss horror up. its sudden its surprising and GODDAMN is it painful!!!! horror's trying not to show it but with all the sweat and the way his fingers are twitching killer can see that it hurts him. it's a bit amusing :3
and then horror grabs the knife from killer and they do it all over again but this time horror's the one doing the stabbing. he's not as precise as killer. he hits him a lot more than killer hit him but goddamn it he is in PAIN and wants to let it out because hes annoying and irritated and goddamnit would killer just stop looking at him with that blank smile while he's bleeding out from his hand???? yeah horror's pissy
horror's annoyed and trying to get some form of petty revenge on killer (he likes it when he finally manages to get that stupid smile to falter just a little bit) and killer's watching horror desperately try not to just stab the knife through his oh so very exposed soul that he could very easily hurt if he really wanted to hurt killer. anyways the game finally ends when either one or both of them get bored! but thats fine!!! killer will get bored again and horror will end up escalating it to a messier point than it was before and the only thing that'll get hurt is the surface that they use to stab between fingers. oh and eachother of course :p
#just know that this was based solely off vibes going on in my head#none of this makes sense at all and i have no idea how to express what im thinking but DAMMIT i know what im talking about!!!!!#two sadists walk into a room. one of them enjoys pain one of them doesnt. they make out (horrorkiller)#i just really think theyre neat. it would be sweet to hear them sing that song. it fits them so well#horrorkiller has the knife game. kist has russian roulette. what does horrordust have#what homoerotic dangerously reckless game could horrordust play??? i dont particularly know..........#i remember playing this game when i was younger except i used a pencil. because i dont wanna fucking stab myself????#the song starts off by mentioning that they get drunk first which like. yeah that seems right#horror would start the game if he were first that way he'd get first turn and then get whiny when killer does it back#the knife goes chop chop chop NO IT DOESNT SILLY! the knife cuts the axe chops :3#horror's voice is all shaky and unstable from the anger and pain while killer's is smooth and calm despite him being hurt more#the dichotomy >>>> i love horrorkiller theyre my favorite mttduo!!!!#guy who feels too much and guy who doesnt feel enough. guy who tries to feel nothing is also there but this isnt about dust ok#cringe stuff i removed from the post: horrorkiller holding their mangled hands together while they play this game#the red and black of their blood mix together and drips on the floor from their ruined hands :3 so sweet..........#because horror needs a thing to squeeze while trying to pretend that killer stabbing through his fucking wrist doesnt hurt 💀#dust knows exactly what game they played the night before when horror starts wearing full gloves. and killer ditches his fingerless ones :3#kiiiillllerrrr stop showing off your stab wounds from your buddy thats not family friendly nor is it straight 😒😒😒😒#tricule hc#killer sans#horror sans#dust sans#murder time trio#he's MENTIONED (like always. if the 3rd member of the trio wasn't mentioned in tags who would i be)#sans au#utmv#horrorkiller#horrorkiller nation (grand total of 5 people) cmere pspsspspspspsps#1/10 DONE for christmas uaagahhh. why did i tag this hrkl when technically all of my posts could be seen as mttpoly anywausLMAO im so tired#off to do the other 9/10 posts i have to finish.....hahahahaah iM SO TIRED WEARE STILL NOT OPENING GIFTS YET WTF PLEASE I WONT STAY AWAKE
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It feels like I’ve forgotten how to make art
which sucks because I’m supposed to be, like, making a career out of this
#i have a fucking degree and it feels like i’ve forgotten everything i’ve learned#not really forgotten tho just having a hard time applying it#and all my ideas are floating around in my head and i cant get a concrete picture of exactly what i wanna do#and when i try to sit down and draw something i can only do a few minutes then i get lost in floaty disjointed ideas again#like i can only do extremely rough sketches atm but when i try to do anything more refined#my mind feels like white noise and i can’t figure out what to do so i stop#and then i look at my former classmates’ social media and they’ve got jobs and have completed lots of work since graduating!#how?#and then all my doubts start to creep in like i can’t make good complete-looking work#and i don’t /actually/ want this bc i struggle with drawing consistently and stuff#ughhhhhhh#ship makes a personal post
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I need to be weirder about the scavengers and cannibalism...
#its been a long day... but im feeling better now. (thanks for the well wishes and such btw <3-)#(-sending my well wishes in return by tenfold bcs. damn. it seems stuff is really going around rn)#but yeah... just. augh. theres just smth about how the scavs sorta translate into more like. thriller-esque genres pretty well?#like. i feel somehow those themes compliment their characteristics? or could compliment their characteristics in a more rounded out way#sure. theyre generally a light hearted romp of absurdity with occasional themes of a not good not bad handling of 'mental health matters'#but they just really shine a bit in horrific circumstances. esp with the sort of absurdity they bring to the table#theyre odd people. even in the context of their generally weird and alien universe. and that right there feels like a trove of potential#its like. ok. the lost light crew? also odd. but thats a huge ship. full of people and variety and a sense of purpose and normalcy post-war#(normalcy being. whatever all those background folks were getting up too while plot happened around them. cruise ship stuff ig)#but in contrast. with the w.a.p crew. its an ark class ship with like. a handful of people. and a whole lot of junk and free time#both just cruising through space endlessly for years. one with hundreds of people. and one with like 6 people.#so both are technically isolated when theyre not making pit-stops planet or station side. but again. 100s vs 6 dudes.#think. top of the line cruise ship from hell with a small town sized populace vs a big shitty boat and 6 starving guys#both have the capacity to become case studies in madness. both could do really well thriller wise. but the scavs being a smaller group?#it only being the 6 of them emphasis the isolation perhaps. less variety. less change. same 6 people for 5(?) years#things could get weird fast. codependent mentalities. us vs them mindsets. an otherness about everyone else outside of their group#and then! then you add to the mix the fact that theyre eating/drinking from corpses?! *chefs kiss* awesome. love it.#non-stationary isolation + cannibalism. ough. perfect mix. a classic of maritime horror but in space! :D!#a big ship. small crew. living while knowing that as soon as you kick the bucket. your body is the meal. your body is the fuel.#no decorum about it. no faith. no belief. just perverse survival. bcs they might enjoy it. a bloody gluttony. with a bite. a sample. a taste#it takes seeing your buddy as a walking talking burger to another level. bcs every corpse you come across is also a burger. and a gas can#also fulcrum making candy out of corpses is so. particularly perfect when it comes to the horrifically absurd. just. smth about it. idk#but also also. the line. where was the line drawn for each of them? and when did they each cross it?#most of them dont seem like the type to jump head first into that. so how did they justify it to themselves? had they done it before?#and then. when did it become normal? a habit? smth enjoyable?#i might be running out of tags. but yeah. them being weirder. esp about each other and others.#nothing brings a group of people together like the overhanging knowledge that you sort of kinda wanna eat each other#(rlly wishing i could stomach realistic thrillers rn. but i just cant. gotta stick to written or artistic styles or risk panic attacks :/)#(ive tried a couple movies and shows now. and cant get through most of them. praise be synopses and peoples long rambles about them tho :D)#(nothing like reading someones passionate ramble about the meaning/symbolism of some gory nightmare without having to actually see it lol)
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i think a lot of people don’t always realize the difference between “this is how i interpret canon” and “this is how i want to write it because that’s what’s fun to me”. a lot of times the latter is all headcanons or AUs are, not an indication of what the writer thinks “is” or “should be” canon
more power to those who are super tuned into actual canon and know these details like the back of their hand, but sometimes people just wanna use a series as a sandbox, not a ruleset. genuinely nothing but respect for people who ARE that knowledgeable, but i and a lot of other people are just here to have fun with characters we enjoy—and want to put them in more accessible settings
#this isn't meant to be grandstanding or anything i'm just thinking aloud. i know i've said stuff like this before it just hit me suddenly#thinking about those weird anons from a while back who were really getting on my case about this#and i could not wrap my head around what the problem was because it’s like. that’s why it’s an au?#why are you mad about details of an au not lining up with canon#that’s the whole point of it being. an au#like of course shadow would normally be able to visit certain places. of course he should already know omega.#but there is a deliberate reason why second chance shadow can't/doesn't#and now i realize it's probably because they were seeing my posts entirely out of context#but still don't go attacking people for out of context posts either??#i'm shocked no one's seriously gotten on my case about aruna's hive yet because it's a prime example of 'intentionally nowhere near canon'#and like overall just don't be a penders and you're fine#lord knows i've got plenty of 'characters who have strayed so far from canon they may as well be OCs' in my pocket#but i still acknowledge they're not by definition OCs yknow#sometimes you just wanna use a funny lil guy as groundwork and then do your own thing#sea talks
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Not for any particular reason, but chat how would we feel about a uf papyrus / general underfell focused magma on monday? Would that be nice?
#I haven't hosted a drawring thing in a minute#I'd try to hop in now and then#I just kinda wanna try getting into the habit of at least trying to do stuff more#I just always tell myself I can't do stuff like that unless I can put in 100% but like. I never have time for that for other things#idk. maybe also it's just a bad idea lmao#like. why? it's not an anniversary or anything but idk. the idea just popped into my head and it sounded like it could be fun#or not idk!!! sorry I have food poisoning or something so I'm feeling out of sorts#this weeks been really weird in a not so good way. barring like. a couple good things#so ig im just a bit out of it#sunny with clouds#possibly delete later if i become less out of it and decide this is Not a good idea
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