#I have so many fics I wanna write about him
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me rn because this means so much to me ;-;-;-; I was so worried when you opened this doc to read aloud for us lol I was shaking in my boots lol but I was so giddy with every response you made to a line you liked ;-;-; I could have cried hard you have no idea-
ive had this vamp idea forever!!!! and I want to do so much more with it but I need to calm down I have so many wips lol- also im a sucker for soulmates like you can't take that from me not even when they have the ability to live forever like obvi they would have a soulmate they wanna feed from like the romance- if he doenst yearn I don't want him-
you have convinced me to like the smut if even a little bit more but I still wish we had like 500 more words of cushion between the reunion and bedroom scenes- ALSO I LOVE THAT VAMPIRES CAN HEAR HEARTBEATS IT’S SO ROMANTIC- ill write about it till the end of time I swear it- and vampire hunger that can only be satiated by you is a concept I die for every night in hopes it will happen to me-
im so happy you liked this fic bc I love it sm and im kinda proud of it and I just ugh thank you serene for taking the time to one read it aloud to me and two reblog it with your nice words, ill spend an eternity coming back to cry over this you have no idea- anyways ;-;-;-;-;-;-; ily thank you sm for reading <3333
bitten
beomgyu x fem!reader
synopsis: it’s been a century since the last youve seen him, why come back now?
warnings: 🔞!!! vampire!beomgyu, vampire!reader, mentions of blood, blood drinking, biting, angst, mentions of a break up,mentions of bite mark scars, a bit of soulmate trope, oral (f!rec), no protection,mentions of subspace, creampie, prob forgot some sorry
wc: 3.8k (now this flung the 2k limit out the window )
an: thank you for the request! I hope that this captured the essence of the request because vamp!gyu was consuming my thoughts after I read those lines. I love vampire fics and im so sad I don't have more on my page already and this was the perfect time to add one. not proofread im so sorry my sweet angel darlings have mercy on me and forgive me of any mistakes found.
[m.list] [1kevent m.list]
The bar was dark enough to keep the bruised necks and wrists of the occasional lost traveler hidden. Spots of blood dripped onto crisp white shirts scenting the air in coppery sweetness. It was a sickening smell to those who didn't need to feed, the alcohol keeping the rest of the occupants held over enough to ignore the twinge.
You didn't come to places like this often, the back room filled with half-drunk vampires and humans, desperately grasping at each other as they took from one another. Even the drinks didn't call to you, not when he wasn't standing there behind the bar passing them to you, constantly working his eyes up your body like a desperate plea to have even a taste. He hadn't been turned then, not when you first met. The pull towards you always accounted for the fact you were tainted with blood lust. A moth to a flame, he felt that pull, your hunger enough to send him right into the fire without even glancing at him.
It wasn't often that a human found themselves offering their bodies up to vampires. Most of them felt the hair rise on the back of their necks, the prickling of fear telling them that whoever was standing just round the corner was a wolf in perfectly tailored sheeps clothing, how tight that human look held onto you after your change. The uncanny glow seeping that poisonous warning off in waves, a trap waiting for the truly reckless to trip.
The ones who wandered closer instead of away always found themselves in the back of bars like this, bruised and hazy eyed laying in beds done up in silk and candlelight. Beomgyu, although working behind the bar for years knew never to offer himself up to the ones who sunk his stomach, that warning to run ringing in his ears as he slid a drink across the hardwood. But you, the second the door had pushed open and your skin washed in that low down glow, tripped him up; your waiting trap snapping shut around him like a rib cage around fluttering lungs. Even the echo of fading hoof beats on stone sounded so close to the beating of his heart that he couldn't tell the difference between flight and flush.
But that had been years ago, so many that you couldn't even remember the shade of his irises. You remember they were brown, staring up at ceilings casing empty houses trying and failing to conger up the image. Well over a century's worth of time to hate yourself for forgetting the one thing that drew you in at first glance. But it wasn't as if you didn't try to work your way through the fading memories of him, all flickering by like the passing pages of a notebook you forgot you wrote and held so dearly. All you could see was that empty bed, the sugary taste of his blood still on your tongue, your breast still tender from where he bit you over your heart, so hard the soft outline of his teeth, like a stain you desperately wanted to rid yourself of.
You had come here, back to this bar only three times after he had left to check in. That night with tears in your eyes, heart crumbling, the second taehyun had confessed that beomgyu was gone, packed up with only a shrugged goodbye. “He said he doesn't know when he will be back,”
You had waited ten years to return the next time, so little time when you counted decades like snowflakes, not the glass shattering hail you assumed beomgyu would have still thought of as a recently turned fledgling. But no one had seen him, heard from him, hardly even thought of him. But he plagued you, ran around your head until you could taste the blood coming from overworked joints.
The third time was no better, not when you entered and Taehyun shook his head, apologizing for a friend he wouldn't recognize anymore.
You had given up, moved away, and swore to never think about beomgyu and his puppy stare. That follow you everywhere look that seeped into your bones and begged you to never turn away from him. Only now you were back, sitting in the far corner you fell in love, sinking into the leather seat wishing you could have that first glance back.
Taehyun felt pity when he saw you, knew that you had been locked away in some house countries away, only sending in orders for blood long since cold. He poured you a glass, the same drink you asked for with tears in your eyes that first night back alone, chugging so many of them back he's sure your blood tasted of fire, too sour, burning all the way down one's throat.
“Thank you,” neither of you wanted to bring Beomgyu up but he was the first thing on both of your minds.
“He hasn't-”
“I don't care,” you tossed back your drink, the ripples of mixed in blood making your fangs tingle, ready to push through soft gums and piece flesh not yet provided. It's why you came. Tired of the empty flavored pints of blood brought to you by Soobin and his sorry eyes. You hadn't put your mouth on anyone since that night, not even when it felt as if you had been scooped out with a spoon, carved open, and laid bare from hunger. If it wasn't him you would have nobody.
But that declaration was a century ago, so many cold cups later it was tiring to swallow another. “I want a girl, preferably quiet, business only,” Taehyun nodded to your order, already knowing the best pick.
“Room 615, she can be brought back in about thirty minutes,” there was no room for judgment, not after the years of working behind this counter, sneaking into those beds just like everyone else had. But he knew what it took from someone who hated to drink from a vein, it's why they had the services, those who couldn't go out and find someone or someones to keep up a constant full belly.
But human blood wasn't the same as drinking from a vampire, humans went out too quickly, blinking back their faintness, never able to take more than a few deep pulls before they were at capacity. Feeding from vampires was anything but a rush, that first mouthful was a wash of exhilaration. It made one dependent on each other, one taste and it was never the same. Taehyun could tell Beomgyu and you drank from each other. Could see it in the years after, the way you turned your nose up even at the bitter drink in your glass.
You would never feel full again unless you had him back.
Thirty minutes was enough time to go home and call soobin for a late night order. But your hunger was clawing up your throat, nails on a chalkboard begging for anything else. Having the time to think, sitting here, filled your mouth with the memory of him. Not just the taste of his blood but the faint drum of his turned heartbeat. You still remember the sound his human heart made. The way it pattered at the sight of you, that irregular beat speeding up every time you sat down in front of him, entered through the cherrywood door.
How even after you had turned him his heart still acted as if it was tied to your presence, fluttering weakly even if it was all it could muster.
It was that sound that made you turn, conjured up from memory only now to show up right behind you. Taehyun was frozen, face pale at the sight of his lost friend. He had only seen him once or twice after he had been turned but now he was no half human fledgling.
Beomgyu and you were caught in a web of your own disastrous weaving, stuck in place witnessing the crumbling of love because seeing him only settled the grievances you held into stone.
He wasn't hollow like you were, empty from the time left alone, the bloodlust having fully settled over his skin making him shine in that uncanny beauty. Everything about his gentle human features has been frozen in place, the warmth in his brown eyes only enhanced in the light. How sickening to have to now face the reality of what you had done to him, what he must have run from once he realized he couldn't truly love the monster who infected him.
It wasn't the butterflies of newfound love but sickening maggots wriggling in your stomach. You stumbled as you stood, not even worrying about the key taehyun had left for you next to your drink, not even a meal could keep you from running as far as you could.
It had been too long for him to come back when you had given up on trying to wait for him. How many nights had been spent waiting for this exact moment? Only now for you to run away. How cruel fate could be.
He was calling your name, that twinge of hurt mixed in with something close to pity, every syllable weaved through with the words, no, don't do this, don't make me feel sorry. Even his voice made you waver, the back and forth shake of your head confusing you as you walked down the wrong hallway.
Even through the doors, you could smell the blood from the occupants behind them, like overripe fruit left to sit on the counter, nothing smelled the same after one drop from him. And now with Beomgyu right behind you, weak heartbeat still mimicking that first sight, it was impossible not to pinpoint the smell of him. Wrapping around you like fog; a haze you tried desperately to claw your way out of but you knew it was no use. You had never felt so hungry until then, carved clean through with the need.
“Please, let me explain,” he tried, grasping at straws. He didn't intend to see you first, only planned on catching up with Taehyun and apologizing for leaving him behind without answers. Save this conversation for when he built up the courage. “Please,”
His fingertips only brushed your arm, the shock of it going right down to your toes. It was instinct to turn and slap his hand away, and even in your exasperated exhale, that first acknowledgment was enough to make Beomgyu weak again, as if he had ever been anything but when attached to you. “What is there to explain? You left, you left me there, alone in our bed,”
“I-” The words were stuck in his mouth, hanging right at the edge of his tongue and yet all that came up was a frustrated laugh, “well did you miss me?” even just hearing his own words he could tell you would fume.
“Did I mi- you left me! You fucking left me, if anything now I just hate you,”
It was so easy to fall back into it with you, as if you had woken up alone a few days ago not centuries, “look what you did to me. What I've become, don't act as if you're so innocent in this, don't blame me for decisions we both made,”
The words felt like a slap in the face. That night you had turned him so clear in your mind, the way he had begged, the way he had burned. It was one of the hardest things you had ever done, most vampires went their whole lifetime without infecting anyone because of how hard it was to complete and yet you had.
“I turned you after you asked me. Do you know how much it takes? And then like some love-sick fool, I drank from you and every day I think about how stupid I was to believe you would stay. After I left behind everything I knew just so that I could have some human boy stay with me. How pathetic,” the last word was thick, sticking to your throat and pulling your tears forward. “You should go back to wherever you ran away to, climb into some feeders bed to keep warm for all I care,”
You turned, ready to close the door on a life you wished you had. The one you begged for after nights spent alone clinging to the sheets that still smelled of him. But Beomgyu wouldn't have it, his grip tight on your wrist as he pulled you back, “It was never about changing me, I left because I wanted to know if it was real- that intensity was so…consuming, I was scared and so I ran. I ran and I looked for some way to replicate it because I'm a fucking fool who can't see right in front of himself. You made me addicted to you, I begged you to do this to me and yet I ran. Im sorry,”
“You can say that but you stayed away so long I'm sure you found some poor soul to swallow down by the mouthful,” he could feel your resentment coiling around him, snapping back at his desperate attempt to explain. Because there was no way for him to get the words out, even after running them around his head for the years he had lost all because of his own fear.
That night was stuck right behind his eyelids, replaying over and over. Your body pressed to his, soundlessly sleeping as he looked up at your shared canopy bed. Your blood was still singing through his body, staining his perception of life before you. He didn't know he could be so utterly infected by someone so much so that it colored his sky differently. Your soft breathing was enough to tear him apart, he wanted countless nights spent exactly like that one, just watching you, listening to you sleep. And it scared him. He thought humans had been over-emotional, feeling things as they came, wallowing in them because they had little time to let it spread out. But he was wrong, he hadn't known how full the world felt, how full he was after one drop of love from you. And now he was empty, starved clean from his own doing. “I was ashamed,”
The confession was so quiet matching your question, “And now?”
Beomgyu looked up from under his lashes, he was close enough now that your scent was suffocating him, begging him to give in and just sink his teeth right over your heart. Find the same place they had last been because no one had been able to tempt him to even pull his fangs down, not since you. “And now I'm starving,”
Even just the word from his mouth made your fangs ache. You had been getting by on so little for so long. He was the only thing your body needed and you knew he must feel the same. Your mouth was filled with saliva, that venom that numbed prey or set them ablaze. You tried to swallow but you could already taste him, the movement of your throat making his eyes zero in on your pulse. You were no better watching his adam’s apple bob, connecting the dots on long since gone trails of hickeys you’d left before.
Neither of you knew who moved first, moaning against lips you were sure you’d never kiss again. His sweet venom singing on your tongue. His hands were heavy on your body, pulling you closer as he pushed you against the hallway wall. He wanted to melt into you, his desperation crawling up his skin, hips keeping you in place.
You chuckled into his mouth, the sound rattling in the back of his throat like a prayer he wanted to keep to himself. “You always did get hard from kissing,” his whimper in response is followed by the grind of his bulge against you. How fast his body reacted to your touch didn’t change when he did.
His heart was picking up speed, your fingers running through his hair, the groves of your fingertips slotting back into place amongst the strands. Beomgyu’s fangs were already elongating, nipping your bottom lip. He had always felt so good about his self-control, accounting those early days of overfeeding on you for the simple fact of being so recently changed, he should have known you were the variable that cracked the hold he had on himself. It was only worse now that he'd nicked you enough to mix blood into the kiss, his throaty moan rumbling against your body, sinking into your soul.
You're both stumbling to find a room, twisting knobs until you find an empty one. The silk bed envelops the both of you as you fall into it, peeling off layers of clothes. Beomgyu can smell your sweet arousal between your legs the second he's pushed them apart to kneel between.
“Now look at this,” you can feel the pad of his thumb running over the bite mark scars he's left on your inner thigh, his grin wicked enough to make your knees twitch. “I wonder if your pretty cunt will remember me as well as your skin has,”
“You're impossible to forget,” and when you expected him to bite you, following the pattern of his usual ravishing but he skipped it, shocking you with his lips wrapping around your clit, sucking deeply.
His mouth is on a direct line to your spine, your back arching off the bed. His tongue is hot on you, tracing the lines of your folds, and moaning into your slick. He missed these desperate whines you let slip, the perfect backtrack to the messy slurping sounds he's started. You hadn't even realized how much you had missed his mouth, your fingers twisting into his hair the second he brushed a fang against your swollen bud. He loved to tease but it had been too long since you felt your orgasm rise so fast.
Beomgyu was eating you like he missed your pussy, your stomach tightening, hips sinking into the sheets. It only takes a few more precise sucks with his puffy lips before your toes are curling, eyes rolling back as you cum for him. His chuckle vibrates against you before he pulls away, chin shining with your wetness. “I missed the taste of you,”
He hasn't even tried to find someone else to take care of his needs, not when he knew no other cunt could compare to the way yours perfectly molded to him, sucking him in to the hilt. The memory alone is what had him rushing to get inside of you, cock already leaking rivets of precum.
You've never felt so needy in your life, fangs and pussy aching for him. The drag of his tip from your clit to your weeping entrance makes your knees fall open. One of his hands guides himself to push into you and the other tenderly holds your hip in place. Your mouth drops open at the stretch, slow as he lets you take in the feeling, needing you to remember how full he kept you.
Beomgyu whines, breath quickening as he shoves in the last few inches. He lets his body fall onto yours, needing to be closer, needing to drag his lips over your neck, teeth scratching at your pulse, “say it again, tell me how much you hate me,”
But he knows you can hardly speak, your legs wrapping around him, arms pulling him down closer. “Shut up,” you gasp, his hips rolling against yours.
“then beg me,” he doesn’t even have to say for what. Not when your neck is rolling back to give him better access to your vein, his lips brushing against your skin with each word. “If you don’t hate me, beg me to taste you. I know you remember how much I love to mix the flavor of your blood with your cum still in my mouth,”
As many times as he's crossed your mind, thinking about his fangs in your neck was something that would never compare to the moment they finally sunk in. You had never let anyone feed from you, not until he was there in front of you pleading. You were no better, not after you had changed him, needing to drain him of almost everything. But with one nod he was biting you.
Beomgyu’s mouth was flooded with your blood, the familiar flavor of iron mixed with the undercurrent of sweet delicacy. He’d dream about the first bite, mouth tingling, fangs brought forward on nothing but the memory of you. Now he was ravenous, so shocked by his own hunger with its pounding fists on nailed shut doors. His hips stuttered in his thrusting, caught on the ecstasy of quenched starvation.
You felt your mind slip into that hazy space, anything he asked would be answered, every action would be taken, and all you knew was him and him alone. To have that numbing venom injected into your bloodstream was enough to break even the strongest down into puddles of simmering whimpers.
It was hard to pull away and keep himself from overfeeding like he wished he could. But he felt his orgasm cresting, stomach flexing as his balls tightened. Beomgyu shoved his wrist to your waiting lips, your fangs stinging as they pierced his weak flesh. You drank deeply, thick swallows of the ichor you had prayed to get back on your tongue.
Everything was crashing down around you, beomgyu groaning as you clenched around him, fluttering walls sucking him in as you came, taking everything he had to give. He was a mess of moans, clinging to you as if that could keep him grounded when he felt this good. Every slow shallow thrust only pushes his cum further into you, still being pulled from him with every pulse of your greedy pussy.
Neither of you can believe how lost you had become, falling into each other like stars crashing into nothing but pooling darkness, so full of energy the only option was to collapse. And it's just what you did, twisting into each other's hold, beomgyu’s kisses pressed over the puncture marks he's made on you, nose brushing up and down your skin trying to keep your scent close.
Breathing evening you fought back the worry settling in. He had left before, walked right out the door without you knowing anything wrong had been on his mind, what was keeping him from doing it all over again?
“Stop thinking,” he muttered, mouth finding yours, mixing the flavors of your blood together as he kissed you. “I don't think I could find it in myself to ever leave again,” but he was pulling away, his playful smirk lingering on his lip cleansing your worrying mind if even for a movement. “How could I ever leave again after seeing how happy and full you are after only one round?” he pulled his still hard cock from you, the gush of cum slipping out, pooling on his ready fingers only to shove them right back into your waiting cunt. “No, nothing could keep me from this sight ever again,”
taglist 🏷: @kissmekissykissme @bts-txt-ateez @apeachty @seungfl0wer @lunesdesire @chasingthatjjunie @no1likemybbgcharlie @beomiracles want to be added to the taglist? check out my rules to see how to join! want to be taken off the taglist? send an ask!
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MacCready not beating the generational trauma allegations 😔😔😔
#sketch that turned into a bigger sketch#I have so many emotion about him <3#I wanna write a whole 90k word fic about him farming#let me depict him being cringe fail at canning pls I won’t be weird#me when I lie#anyway yeah I’m stupid abt him and also pls zoom in on the bear#it has the little lamplight hat 🥳#fallout 4#rj maccready#MacCready#fallout#fallout 3#fallout 4 fanart#fallout fanart#fallout 3 fanart#rj MacCready fanart#MacCready fanart#serenade draws
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im so emotionally attached to jason grace it's not even funny atp. i literally think about him all day, I'm not exaggerating pls someone tell me they feel this way too 😮💨
#i actually might need to stop posting jason grace content for a while bc it's getting overwhelming lmao. the hyperfixation is REAL#I have so many ideas about him to post that i had to write it down on my notes app 😭#it's gotten so bad that I have attention span issues to do real life tasks bc I just wanna keep talking abt jason's character all day-#i actually went like 1/2 months without a jason grace hyper fixation. that's around the time I was inactive on tumblr#but these past few weeks the hyper fixation is hitting me harder. I'm pretty sure you can tell by how many posts i spammed this week#the fact that the jason grace x reader community isn't as active as it was back then is also not helping my hyperfixation at all#there used to be HEAPS of them every day that I looked forward to reading them every morning now I can't even see 2 in a week#i used these fics as an 'aid' for my attachment and still kinda do#also don't even get me started on how his death devastates me every single day omg like I feel genuine RAGE#pjo fanfic#pjo#pjo hoo toa#pjo series#percy jackson#percy jackson fandom#jason grace#pjo hoo#pjo fandom
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watched World Tour a week ago + finally caved in
what can i say. i love him. he's been swimming circles in my head since i saw him
#i have so many headcanons about him + Techno Trolls already#it's insane#i'm definitely not hyperfixating#my account is still gonna be majority turtles#but it's like sun + moon now where he's just hanging out in my head freely#occasionally walks right into the forefront of my thoughts + then lays low for a while y'know#makes me wanna write a fic about him#update: guess who's writing a fic about him#i'm never drawing this motherfucker's tail again i swear to GOD#ACTUAL. HELL.#dreamworks trolls#trolls dreamworks#trolls#trolls movie#trolls world tour#trolls fanart#king trollex#trolls king trollex#zero drawings here
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cw: mention of previous abuse, dad Dabi, mom reader, mention of childbirth, angst
new dad touya that doesn’t know how to deal with his son. he’s growing too fast and his smiles are so big, but he’s still not sure how to just be with him.
touya isn’t abusive in the slightest, not like his shit for brains dad. he can acknowledge, after you’ve drilled it into his head on cold nights where you had to hold his quivering cheeks in your hand, that he’s better. that he’s trying. that he’s a great dad.
he doesn’t really believe it. it’s hard to believe that he’s a great dad when his son, still covered in that fresh newborn smell, stares up at him with matching azure blue eyes, the little shit, and he finds it hard to smile back. it’d be easier to smile back if he could guarantee a life with no trauma, with the perfect pair of parents, that he’d love him as much as his tiny little face deserved.
touya can still hear the labor and delivery nurse tell him that he must’ve gotten on your nerves for the baby to look so much like him, and that they’ve never seen a baby that fresh out the womb smile so big at their dad. he hands the little bundle back to you, and glares at the nurse who hands him a tissue. he takes it anyway.
touya loves his son. so goddamn much that it hurts, but, he doesn’t know how to be a dad. and he knows that you don’t know how to be a mom either, that it’s a learning process for the both of you. but he’s so scared—he’s terrified that he’ll fuck up this innocent brat with his ruin. with his scars and history and the want to better but never knowing how to just be.
so he leaves. it’s the day after your sons first birthday that you celebrated together in your home.
you thought everything was okay, that he was starting to get the hang of being a dad. he did everything right, why couldn’t he stay? he sat on the floor with your son and changed his diaper and made him giggle those addicting baby giggles? he carried your son everywhere whenever he cried after being sat down without a single complaint? he helped him open his birthday presents? he didn’t smash the cake in his face, only swiped a little icing on his sons nose to hear that addicting baby giggle? he held your son like he could never let him go?
how could he just go like this? you thought he was finally learning and accepting how to be a dad? what happened?
#angst angst angst#SORRY#I thought about this earlier while I was under the dryer#and I was like ohhhh write that down before your slow ass forgets#my toxic trait is that every time I write soemthing short im like#……this could be a full fic 🫣#LMFAO honestly duck it im making this a full fic#I have so many on my plate but this has to go on the list#he makes my heart so sad I love him mr pathetic man with so many troubles in his head#I also wanna write a sleazy shiggy n keigo fic (separate) what’s wrong with me#all these ideas and no juice to write them#im just about halfway finished w my classes so maybe il get more inspo to write#anyway I have a bkg draft from like two nights ago that I forgot about#and I wanna write that too but my head really hurts and I have to be up early tomorrow sad 😔#okay I think im gonna sleep now :)#—new treat in the streets! 🍫#dabi treats! 🍬
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Thinking about Jam again and how angsty I can make the next fic after My Girl
Found this on a discord server I'm on lol and immediately went "me and the urge to make angst as angsty as possible"
#i could make it mildly angsty but overall fine#OR i could rip tim to shreds and force him to put himself back together only to kill jay and rip tim to shreds again because “its his fault#that post about the dangers of choking has me THINKING#like. ive already set up jays consent issues. i can go HAM with them if i want. i can make tim thunk hes getting the basics of consent#through Jays thick skull and then force him to realise that no. no jays still incredibly fucked in the head and does not understand his own#ability to say no or anyone elses. i can make him need several days to come to terms with what happened. i can make his system go crazy#trying to protect themselves from the emotional fallout of what happened and split a whole new person just to handle it because jesus#fucking christ literally no one they already have can properly handle dealing with Jay. and then i can make it so that they HAVE to go to#benedict hall together. and I can make entry 80 happen. i can make Jay die because Tim insisted they split up because he still cant handle#being around Jay again yet (which. fair im not gonna blame him i dont think anyone would wanna be near Jay after that lmfao. Alex certainly#didnt did he?)#just AAA i have so many thoughts!!!!!!!#how many of these thoughts will i actually write into SIL canon in the end? god only knows :D#marble hornets#mh sorry its locked#fic/series rated e on ao3#in case anyone would prefer not to read that#mh jam
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saikechi “back to the old house” by the smiths the line “and you never knew how much i really liked you, because i never really told you”
#IM TRYINT TO BE COOL BUT IM SCREAMING#saiki fits SO many smiths songs but this one is so saikechi#Please and the line and are you still there or have you moved away#SCREAMS#there’s too many bad memories#I wanna write a whole fic about how saiki’s fucking relieved to meet akechi again. Like he’s in love with him#he can finally say everything he didn’t get to before he left without a word#you were my first friend.#you were the only one who treated me like i was meant to be loved.#you taught me how to be a kid.#saiki k#saikechi#they’re in LOVE#saiki wants him sooo bad#akechi wants to treasure him#they’ll kiss#AHHHH#the disastrous life of saiki k#tdlosk#saiki k nonsense#touma akechi#akechi touma
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I think Cedric and Calamus should be friends and join the club of teenagers with way too much weight on their shoulders because holy shit they deserve good things.
I mean, one of those small details that I always felt were kind of sad was that line Cedric has about not knowing Calamus or Alula... which makes sense in a way, because it was the Author who knew them better. And yet both Cedric and Calamus feel close in age and have similar personalities I am genuinely surprised they weren't friends.
And now considering their circumstances... Both of them need to be the proactive sibling, ready to react to situations that are beyond what teens like them should be doing.
We... never get told what happened to Rachis, although context probably tells us he was one of the NPCs lost to the squares. But even if Calamus and Alula were not aware of that truth, they're both still functionally orphans, and Calamus has made it his responsibility to make sure Alula is okay because she is all he has left.
Cedric is one of the few people aware of being in a simulation, and this by itself is already really isolating. Cedric is also the one responsible for... pretty much ensuring that Niko made it to the city and fulfilled their mission, having to make up plans as he goes. Not to mention the knowledge that his father is gone for good now, and the grief that is tied to it.
And besides all of this, I just really think that these two are alike in personality. Both are really polite, hardworking and responsible. The only big differences are their sets of skills and that Cedric is more willing to take risks on the spot, while I feel like Calamus would be more cautious in his place.
But gosh they could be good friends.
#oneshot game#cedric#calamus#analysis#i am not the most skilled writer but boy do i wanna do something about this yknow#Something something i wonder if Rachis and the Author had a similar dynamic at some point#Oh. another aspect im considering too as a bit of a crack theory. or a way to get some conflict potential#like. we know the cedric we meet is technically a robot.#my personal take on that is that he is made from code and contains as many memories as the original cedric was able to transfer#but when it comes to have actually experienced those things... our cedric knows those are memories. but are not /his/ own. in a way.#calamus and alula have memories that were coded in them but without awareness of their situation they see all of that as real#but cedric knows he is code and thus. he has existed inside. but whatever came before was the memories he inherited but not his own actions#so he recognizes those names. but is actually not sure he really knows them the same way his memories know them#and cannot guarantee he can be the friend they have known him as. because he is who cedric was#but also his own thing#this is a mess to explain but do u see what i mean#like how real he sees himself and how real the future ahead is and who he is aaslkfja#ok im done with my break ignore this rambling. this probably makes no sense.#im just figuring out how i wanna write characters#fic: write your own path forward#< for personal organization
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spacing out during finals, and imagined a scenario where childhood s/o and aki are in elementary school- a kid trips little s/o in the mud and little aki gets them back by sticking gum in their hair (╥﹏╥) cause bro really be doing that fr 💀
anon... don't get me started... my heart has been yearning so much for childhood friends with aki these days.......
and he would totally do that too, young aki would pick a fight with anyone who bullies you or makes you cry. when he gets a little older, he's actually quite intimidating to the rest of the students, so just sticking with him is enough to ensure no-one tries to mess with you. he'll always make an effort to include you even when everyone else isn't; you're practically stuck together like glue, and even though any rumors about the two of you barely ever reach your ears, you're sure they've noticed how you and aki are rarely seen apart from one another.
#childhood friends with aki where you and aki are best friends since you were kids and simultaneously each other's only friends#I always imagined that people would often treat aki like an outcast#the gun devil attack is such a touchy subject#the other students just see him as weird and rude and unapproachable#so you end up as really the only person he trusts enough to confide in#it's also pretty obvious he's training to become a devil hunter#which kind of makes people scared of him lol#aaaauuuuuuuu I wanna write about this so bad#I think I'll start working on it when I'm done with my current long fic#I have a billion thoughts in my brain about this I could really go on and on forever about this au#just... being childhood friends with aki since the two of you were little kids#knowing everything he's been through and witnessing it all with your own eyes#the struggle between his desire to become a devil hunter#and you being the only thing he has left and the one person he cares about the most#and just.... when he leaves.... but then... when you finally meet again....#and so many things are different.... he went through so much and threw his life away over and over again#but he still has that same old soft spot for you#I'm going to go insaaaaaneeee!!!!#ask mags
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Sometimes you can be struggling so much with general life shit and feeling so sad over your inability to write at such a time, and then next thing you know it's 2am and the words are pouring out of you as a story demands your attention. and you find yourself hunched over your computer in the dark, desperately trying to capture the images and feelings that flicker through your mind like erratic fireflies before they disappear into the night
#the chill night air of autumn/winter is the time when Fire on the Horizon wants to be written#& Bakugou refuses to respect the fact that I'm sad and stressed and hounds my brain with a ferocity that demands that I pay him attention#so here I am... bundled in my cosiest oversized hoodie letting myself be flooded with the feelings and words#of Kirishima as he beholds Bakugou for the first time in a decade#whilst I listen to my 4+ hr playlist for a fic I've barely even written yet#goddddddddd I just wanna write and release Fire on the Horizon so bad and I think it's super rude that I have to write it all first#fire on the horizon#krbk#i legit have so many fucking feelings about Bakugou every second of every day and I don't know how I function at this point. spoiler I don'
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Have some more Sage facts cause I've been thinking about him a lot lately:
His universe's version of the Prowler is his older brother Abe.
Abe became the Prowler after he was separated from his family, in an attempt to find them and protect/care for them. (they were separated before Sage was caught and brought to an Oscorp lab so Abe doesn't know what's happened to him)
He and Sage reunites when Abe's on a mission as the Prowler to get intel from an Oscorp facility.
Abe was wounded and about to get caught by the guards when Sage showed up for dinner- killing all the guards and almost killing Abe too.
Cause they don't recognise each other as Abe's in his Prowler gear and Sage is in his symbiote form.
Abe barely manages to convince Sage that they're on the same side, as they both wish for the downfall of Oscorp (Abe suspects Oscorp has something to do with the disappearance of his brother. He also blames Oscorp for the separation of his family after their dad died.)
They form an uneasy alliance and do missions together from time to time, but none of them know the other one is their brother as they're always their alter egos when they meet up.
I haven't decided when or how I want them to find out that they've been working with their long lost sibling the entire time.
I just know that when it's eventually revealed they both have mixed feelings about it.
Cause they've both witnessed the other one do horrible stuff to other people. Sage isn't sure he's even the same person as he was back when they were separated, he's been through so mush since then.
And Abe's been viewing Sage (the symbiote version he's been working with) only as a means to an end in an attempt to look for his family, but now he suddenly has to reevaluate the time they spent together and the way he treated him. Cause he didn't see him as nothing more than a monster he could use to get rid of Oscorp goons. But now he realises he's been dragging his little brother along for dangerous missions and put him in horrible situations in order to reach his own goals. + Sage has witnessed him to awful stuff to people in order to get what he wants, things he never wanted his little brother to see.
They're not sure they can ever go back to the way things were. Abe wants to try, but Sage is more reluctant. Mostly because so much has changed since then. He's changed since then. He's not sure he can be who Abe expects him to be anymore. So he runs away. Cause he doesn't want Abe to get hurt. And he'll be hurt if he stays near Sage.
Will they reconcile? Who knows? Guess time will tell, cause I haven't figured it out yet lol.
I have so much more Sage lore but I wanna keep this post relatively short.
(Also if you've read all of this just know that I love you <3)
#been trying to work on my fic but Sage has me in a chokehold#so now I'll try writing about him in an attempt to get some room for working on my fic lol#cause I keep thinking about this#you know I gotta keep things angsty#I have so many more thoughts about Sage and Abe but I really tried to keep the post short this time#since it seems I always end up writing entire essays when I write about Sage#if you have any questions or just wanna talk about Sage in general please hmu!#I wanna talk about my boy!!1#but I never know where to start or where to end lol#Also I haven't written about him for a while so I'm not sure everyone even knows who he is lol#but yeah if you've seen me tag posts with Sage- this is who I'm talking about <3#oh would you look at that it's 3 am now#better go to bed lol#Sage#symbiote!hobie#the prowler#abe brown#my oc#my post#spiderverse#across the spider verse#atsv#kinda wanna tag this as hobie since sage is a hobie variant#but since I don't mention him in the post I probably shouldn't#once again if you've read all of this- thank you so so much! I love you <3
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Am I restarting CotL again so I can take the Pit Fight ritual instead of the Wedding and unlock that in the postgame so I can marry a tsundere cat boy without anyone else asking first? MAYBE SO.
#like item 1 I wanna see if the crush chain leads to a pit fight if I'm not a marriage candidate#that sounds hilarious#item 2 it's awkward to be like 'oh. no I unlocked this ritual because eventually I'm going to fight god and then put a ring on him.'#'I understand the confusion and thank you but no'#much easier to avoid marriage proposals if our cult does not have marriage as A Thing until I wanna do it#tea plays too many games#I'm also writing fanfic about this game. somehow. somewhy.#why isn't somewhy a real word we have somewhat and somehow#anyway yeah I was like 'I want a romantic throughline with my horrible cat god-husband'#so#fic#because of who I am as a person#SHOULD I be replaying when they're gonna release a big expansion this year?#maybe not. maybe I should wait.#AM I going to wait?#uh. signs point to no.
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If you see the final word count for my completed fic gently increasing over months and months no you dont
#i have realised that the ‘fast n loose’ method for churning out a fic doesnt work for me actually#i am so sad that so much of that fic was skipped- or told and not shown- or brushed over in favour of me forcing it out quickly#i know i did it for a good reason- that if i took my time with it and it grew bigger and bigger that there was a risk i would have exhausted#myself and not finished it at all which would have been way worse#i think actually taking 3 months to craft 15k chapters with many drafts makes me happier than churning out 4k in a week#that being said im so glad its finished and that- somehow- it did so much better than i would have ever dreamed <33#now i can go back and make it what i want it to be without the pressure of racing against my own stamina#and. if im really honest. i didnt think i would still be into avatar for this long lmao#i thought id lose the brainrot at around month three so i had to finish the fic before then#and yet. month 7 and i draw spider in my sketchbook every day. i think about him every spare minute.#the brainrot is still kicking and im happy#anyway here i go to dive back into that fic and add even more angst and whump and maybe another hug. if spider is lucky#i also want to write a little one shot about Ngaire properly taking care of spider after something bad happens#but idk if people wanna read OC stuff and its certainly not my comfort zone so i might keep it to myself#N E WAY this was the biggest and dumbest ramble to myself about my own fics lmao i should really shut up and just go write :’)
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need someone to sit across from me in a coffee shop so i can work on writing i think id really like to finish that husbands fic because im actually insanely proud of it
#i almost wanted to see if i could use it in like#a professional published piece but#its so much about dundee struggling internally with like#losing his memories and dying and being brought back into a club that has grown so much its pushed him out like#i really dont think theres any way to work that into a different original situation because#the context of dundees story is so inherently important to the fic since im not explicitly writing what happened just responding to it#so i feel like if thats the case i may as well finish and publish it as fanfic so at least people can read something i am proud of#plus how many writers have gotten their fanfic changed and traditionally published at this point i mean#ill become that weird writer u find out wrote fanfic of the most obscure fucked up shit idc#anyway#someone body double and hold me accountable i need company and noise#i have dndads fics i wanna write/finish too so
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why is there only 5 masadai fics on ao3
why IS there only 5 masadai fics on ao3....
#snap chats#YK WHAT THATS AWFUL YK WHY#CAUSE THERES ONLY ONE FIC FOR AKIYAMA AND SHINADA ON AO3#AND I COULD AT LEAST JUSTIFY SEEING MORE FICS OF THEM THAN MASADAI#im trying my hardest to raise that number tho....#i have so many masadai fics hoarded but im shy about sharing them#i wanna make them better cause i feel like im making a pitch or some shit like Guys Wait Here's Why I'm Not Totally Insane#i should have a sfw masadai fic done this week... its based off that comic where ichi snoopin#it a lil diff obvi but yk#but yeah no like i can think of a lot of concepts for them im just bad at writing#so for the five sexy souls writing on Ao3 godspeed you're the strongest solider out there#masadai is really funny tho im actually surprised there isnt more but im also not#cause like sure Goth Nepo Babies Who Become Domesticated sounds like prime material to write for#esp when i see like. people pairing nishiki and saejima together No Hate Just Saying The Creativity Is Boundless#but also its masato. like. prob one of the most uncomfortable characters to talk about#coupled with daigo who already has three more popular characters to pair him off with like it makes sense
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Me: *Writes a whole post about how it would be so cool to see Curly use morse code to communicate post-crash while still on the Tulpar and how that would alter his role in the story (even if it might not fit thematically in canon, AUs and fanfics still exist for a reason)*
This Post: "Morse Code"
Me:
You. You get me.
yeah i'm mad
#mouthwashing#honestly have so much to say about all the ways you could utilize assistive devices in post-canon curly fics#and how it would be cool to see him adapt to his disabilities in ways outside of using those sci-fi prosthetics#and instead show ways most people with these types of disabilities do things irl#also can be fun to write characters with multiple physical disabilities who combine devices to make up for what some lack#it could just be so fucking cool i literally made up an eyelid prosthetic and was so proud of it#i had so many ideas on what stuff he would use as someone with no limbs#and then i looked back at his canon design and realized ha had a lot more limb than i thought/remembered#so actually some of my ideas were basically pointless but the eyelid one could still work i swear#also the representation i was talking about could still apply just differently#anyways yeah the main thing that is making his life most difficult right now is probably the severe chronic pain of having no skin#something i will never fully get over because i can comprehend 3rd degree burns but lack of skin? how is he alive-#but the rest is good and you can find some stuff to help out#honestly the only true sci-fi bs that might be needed is getting him some kind of skin or something similar to protect his sensitive flesh#the rest i wanna see him adapt with irl stuff
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