#I have near to 0 foresight and ability to see the future and as a result do not have much ability to make strategies and solutions

[system-of-a-feather]

Today I was invited to the table of the game of life. Everyone here is playing their cards, some are playing Magic, others Pokemon, some Yugioh, some playing cards, and even one guy over there has been playing Baseball cards I think, but as absurd as this game looks, they all appear to be building to a greater image.

The call me to the table to add to the game.

I walk up and pull out my deck of one, singular Skip Uno card. I sit down and shout Uno and play my Skip Uno card. I have won.

The table looks at me - paused in bafflement; a silent stare of bewilderment

They tell me that is not how this game of life works. We each create combos, chains, strategies and skills and build this massive play to form a much greater game.

They tell me that there isn't any winning in this game of life; they tell me that I need to bring more cards to the table, draw some more and join in on creating chained webs and supportive suggestions.

I tell them this is all that I have, there is nothing more to how my plays work other than this singular Skip Uno Card. I play Uno, the only function of Uno is to remove your cards. There is a limited amount of chain and skillful strategy that can be played in the traditional game of Uno; even less when your entire deck is empty and all you have is a singular card.

We have an issue. My game doesn't work at this table. We are incompatible, my deck simply doesn't work with the nature of this collaborative game.

I turn to the ref, solutions my good man. I can't fix my deck, I can't generate new cards. I can't make a play other than Skip Uno, what can anyone ask of me.

The ref checks the book, he checks the rules; he looks up and with a quizzical suggestion, asks if I could ask for someone else's cards

I say no, I don't have a card for that, all I have is a single Skip Uno Card. I do not have a Draw 4 or Draw 2. I only have Skip Uno.

He looks at me. He turns to the other players. He whispers in their ears as they chatter among one another. They each pull from their decks, donating one card each and collecting them into a stack.

They hand me the deck. In it, a Preordain, a holographic Charizard, a single piece of Exodia, a four of spades, and Babe Ruth. These cards now sit around my single Skip Uno card.

I turn to the ref, raising an eyebrow at this strange deck built before me; uncertain if this solution would work, if these cards could even possibly be played at this table.

Even so, new options have been placed in my hand. The bizarre game resumes. I play the four of spades.

The turn roles by.

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #38: Cú Chulainn (Caster)

That’s right, the good boy with the good boys is back once again for another DnD build. CasCú’s a Wildfire Druid, which replaces his wildshape ability with the ability to summon a flaming elemental to crush his enemies (convenient, huh?). 

As always, there’s a spreadsheet for the build, or you can check out the level-by-level breakdown below the cut!

Race and Background

You’re the son of the sun, meaning you’re still an Aasimar. We’re changing things up a bit this time, though! Thanks to your dedication to being a guide in this spearless form, you’re not a fallen Aasimar, but a Protector Aasimar instead!. This gives you +1 to Wisdom and +2 to Charisma, 60′ of Darkvision, Celestial Resistance to necrotic and radiant damage, Healing Hands that can heal your level in HP per long rest, and the Light cantrip.

Your background is a trickier question. You could have the same background as your other selves, but you seem to know a lot more than you’re letting on. That and your self-imposed ‘druid’ shtick should be just enough to push you into the Hermit background, giving you proficiency in Medicine and (It should be religion, but let’s swap it out for Arcana. Nobody will notice).

Stats

Your goal is to guide others, so your Wisdom and Intelligence are pretty high. You’re no Emiya, but you also don’t try to sit people down for a lecture in the middle of Fuyuki, so you’ve got that going for you. Next is your Dexterity, you may not have a spear but you do have your training. Following that is your Constitution; you’ve been trained by one of the most brutal masters out there, so even as a caster you’re pretty tough. After that is Charisma, you’re still pretty rough when it comes to dealing with other people outside of mentoring them. Finally, dump Strength. We don’t need it, nor do we want it.

Class Levels

1. As stated in the opening, you’re a Druid, and first level druids learn Druidic and how to cast Spells. Druidic is a secret written language that only you and other druids know and requires a perception check for others to even find, let alone decipher. You prepare spells from the druid spell list, and use your wisdom to cast them. Because they’re swapped out so easily, I won’t be covering individual spells here.

As a druid, you also get proficiency in Intelligence and Wisdom saving throws, as well as in two skills from the druid list, here Nature and Survival.

On top of their spells, druids get two cantrips, so grab Guidance because that’s what you do (and it won’t be useful past level one anyway) and Shillelagh because sometimes you’ll have to deal with people who refuse to learn. Shillelagh has the additional bonus of being almost as difficult to sound out as your own name.

2. At second level you gain Wild Shape, a.k.a. the reason druid won’t be showing up that often in these builds. At this level, you can use your action to transform into a beast with CR 1/4 or lower, as long as it doesn’t have a flying or swimming speed. A beast shape lasts for half your druid level in hours, and you can use it twice per short rest. In beast mode, you have the beast’s physical stats, your mental stats, and combine your proficiencies, using whichever is higher. You can’t cast spells, but you can use actions of spells you’ve already cast. Technically, we never see Cu turn into a bear in FGO, but we never see him say he can’t, so technically we’re still canon compliant.

You also join the wildfire circle this level, letting you Summon Wildfire Spirit. With this feature, you can burn a wild shape charge to instead create your Wicker Man, sort of. The wildfire spirit you can summon is technically small and can fly, but it’s nothing a little creativity won’t solve. You summon the spirit somewhere within 30′ of you, and every creature within 10′ of where it comes in must make a dex save vs your spell DC or take 2d6 fire damage. The spirit is friendly, but you have to use your bonus action each turn to give it orders. The spirit sticks around for an hour, until reduced to 0 hp, or until you summon another spirit.

You can also use your Wild Shape uses to summon a Wild Companion, giving you a free casting of Find Familiar. It’s not quite a wolf, but it’s something.

You also also get Circle spells, like Burning Hands and Cure Wounds. Good for you.

3. Third level druids get second level spells, including your circle spells Flaming Sphere and Scorching Ray. A little extra fire power (ha ha, funny pun) never hurt anyone-except who you want it to.

Also, your solar ancestry kicks in and you become a Radiant Soul. You can spend your action to transform in a different way for one minute, making your eyes glow and giving yourself spectral wings. You gain a flying speed of 30′, and can deal radiant damage equal to your level to something you’re already hitting once per turn. You can use this feature once per long rest.

4. You get a Wild Shape Improvement, letting you transform into beasts of CR 1/2 that can swim. You also get an Ability Score Improvement, which we’re spending on the Elemental Adept feat, because spoilers, we’re going to be using a lot of fire. Now you ignore resistance to fire, and you count 1s rolled on fire damage as 2s. Unfortunately, I don’t think this applies to Wicker Man, as they’re their own person.

Speaking of fire damage, you get another cantrip at this level, so grab Produce Flame to produce some flames.

5. Fifth level druids get third level spells, including your circle spells Revivify and Plant Growth. The latter gives you more stuff to set on fire, and the former will help out any teammates who wander too close to your firing range.

6. You now have an Enhanced Bond with your Wicker Man. While your wildfire spirit is active, you can add 1d8 to your fire or healing spells. This bonus only affects the damage or healing of one creature. You can also cast spells with a range longer than self from your wildfire spirit. This means your spirit can now cast Hold Person, which is the closest we’re getting to a proper rendition of your NP in this build.

7. You can now prepare fourth level spells! Your new circle spells are Aura of Life and Fire Shield. The latter is a good multipurpose “don’t hit me” spell, and the former is nice if your teammates refuse to stop dying in front of you.

8. Your Wild Shape improves once more, and you can now transform into any beast of CR 1 or lower. You’re pretty smart when it comes to using rune magic, so use your next ASI to become a Ritual Caster. When you get this feat, you learn two first level rituals from the wizard spell list, and you can learn even more by coming across other spells that have been written down. The spells you copy have to be half your level, rounded down.

9. You learn 5th level spells, including Flame Strike to marry your fire damage and radiant damage halves and Mass Cure Wounds to try and keep your various lancer forms from shindeiru-ing.

10. At tenth level, you get another cantrip. Druidcraft lets you see the future, and unlike most clairvoyance spells has no chance of being wrong. Forcing your DM to stick with a decision can be very powerful in the right circumstances. As a wildfire druid, you also learn to create Cauterizing Flames. When a small or larger creature dies near the Wicker Man, a spectral flame pops out of their corpse for a minute. You can use your reaction when a creature enters the same space as the flame to either heal them or deal fire damage. In either case, it’s 2d10+ your wisdom modifier. You can react this way a number of times per long rest equal to your proficiency bonus.

11. You get 6th level spells, and unfortunately you no longer get any circle spells. I would suggest looking at Sunbeam for more radiant damage or Find the Path to enhance your role as a guide to others.

12. Use your next ASI to finally improve your ability score, specifically boosting Wisdom.

13. You get 7th level spells, and I’d suggest Fire Storm, for the obvious connection it has with your build.

14. Your last wildfire bonus is your Blazing Revival. If your spirit is nearby when you drop to 0 HP, your spirit can take the hit instead, healing you to half your hit points. You can use this once per long rest. Dying is for the other yous.

15. You gain the ability to prepare 8th level spells, including Sunburst.

16. Max out your Wisdom with this next ASI.

17. You can now prepare and cast any spell in the cleric spell list, including 9th level spells, including Foresight in case you want to be right in literally every way.

18. You now have a Timeless Body, which ages one year for every 10 that pass. You also get the Beast Spells feature, letting you cast spells from your wild shape, so long as they don’t have material components.

19. Put your last ASI into Constitution for better concentration and a little more survivability.

20. You become an Archdruid, giving you unlimited wild shape uses. You can also cast any spells in your wild shape, so long as it doesn’t include materials that cost money.

Pros: High level druids are already difficult to kill thanks to their wild shapes. You take it to a whole new level by cheating death with your Blazing Endurance, then immediately healing yourself back up with your Flames of Life. Your wildfire spirit is also very useful for casting spells at range. Picking up Ritual Caster also gives the build a lot of utility that doesn’t require your wild shape or spell slots to be useful.

Cons: Your wicker man doesn’t really hold up at higher levels. It will always have a low AC, and 1d6+6 fire damage per turn doesn’t mean much at level 20. Combined with your own reliance on fire damage, you may find yourself in situations where you can’t really use a major part of your build.

Looking on the positive side, this is just another chance for you to step back and help other members of the party be their best, which is the most in-character thing you can do.

Next time: We’re going swallow hunting.

[signetofworlds]

All Preordained, A Prisoner in Chains (Aroden)

(image taken from Pathfinderwiki, originally from the 100th Adventure Path)

All preordained A prisoner in chains A victim of venomous fate Kicked in the face You can't pray for a place In heaven's unearthly estate

-Neil Peart, “Freewill”

One thing that I pride myself on is having relatively few adversaries despite my incredibly advanced lifespan. I do my best to be friendly with whatever beings I encounter, atone for whatever affronts I make, and when necessary eliminate my rather insistent enemies from existence with minimal hassle. I like to depart whatever worlds I tread upon with no baggage left behind whenever possible, confining any conflicts to the depths of my memory banks for which I have no immediate use.

However, there is one specific individual whom I have neither forgotten nor forgiven in my time, a man who endangered his world and people in incomprehensible ways while being being remembered as a savior. A man who I was unfortunately unable to kill because found a roundabout method of becoming a god, a man who I will boldly say I am glad is seemingly gone from the mutliverse forever. This man is the last Azlanti, the protector of Golarion’s humanity, the emblem of human triumph for much of the planet’s history: Aroden.

Now, before some of you make fallacious claims about me not knowing the legendary man well enough to properly judge his character, let me relay our history together. I was there in Azlant when he worked as a smith, and the bracelets upon my arms were in fact fashioned in his workshop. I was in court the day he claimed that he was the only one worthy of the Diamond Sword (clearly, he failed to acknowledge my presence, although I have little use for such weaponry). I watched him reassemble the huddled masses of humanity into the Knights of the Ioun Star. I was there on the day he raised Absalom from the depths and ascended to godhood, dooming Golarion in ways he might have been able to but unfortunately refused to comprehend.

I should explain how prophecies work, given the impressive amount of misinformation bouncing around on the subject. Imagine the future as bookshelf, one which contains a wide variety of potential tales that one can explore by taking the time to peruse through them. Prophecies take all but a few of those books and toss them into a bonfire, culling away chains of events until only a few near-identical ones remain. Of course, these few remaining futures all tie in some way to the prophet’s own fear or desire, pushing the future onto a specific rail with potentially tremendous ramifications. Destruction of futures is something rather difficult to comprehend for anyone who has never experienced any significant time travel, but trust me when I say that the breakdown of consequences can be disastrous and that sundering fractal timelines is one of the few things that will actually get Yog-Sothoth to display something akin to anger.

The Azlanti people abused prophetic magic in a wide variety of ways over the course of their time on Golarion, and Aroden happened to be a benefactor of this rampant obliteration of timestreams. Born with innately impressive abilities, Aroden benefitted from numerous localized temporal cullings (call them prophecies if you wish) and eventually secured himself a position of effective untouchability. By the time Aroden returned to bring humanity out of the Age of Darkness, so many timelines had been obliterated that probabilities would bend unpredictably in this fellow’s favor simply because any other outcomes had been magically eliminated.

It was at this point that I stepped in and tried to stop Aroden and his prophecy-obsessed disciples from wrecking any more havoc with cosmic forces. I take little joy in conflict, but neither an atom in my body nor a mote in my magic regretted my actions as I slaughtered Azlanti mages en masse over the course of those months. Eventually, Aroden confronted me himself, and no matter what reasons I laid before my old friend he insisted on saving what few scraps of prophetic spell knowledge I sought to destroy. The ensuing battle was amongst the most grueling I’ve ever endured, and only through some obscure spell knowledge and what little luck could still challenge this reality-collapsing fanatic was I able to escape the conflict intact.

But all of Aroden’s crimes against the multiverse pale in comparison to his ascension and what it did to Golarion. When Aroden became the God of Prophecy, his capacity for timeline destruction became far more potent than even the most catastrophic mortal prophets. Upon his ascension, Golarion’s timeline literally collapsed into a single chain of events, with all probabilities and potential destinies becoming set on a single course which Aroden had decided in his supreme arrogance. This total annihilation of free will and probabilistic uncertainty made it incredibly hazardous to even be near Golarion during the Age of Enthronement, which led me and many other mages learned enough to realize this to flee the planet for what we thought would be forever.

The death of Aroden was an event that I was most grateful for, as I felt that I still had much to learn about Golarion. Some blasphemous theologians speculate that Aroden ended his own existence in order to shatter the paradigm of predestination he had created. It is quite possible that he dreaded the future he had foreseen and unwittingly mandated, choosing to die rather than see it come to pass. Perhaps it did actually come to pass despite his best efforts, as I could envision few fates more catastrophic than what eventually became of Golarion. Maybe if he had never trapped the planet on a specific timeline the ensuing multiversal could have been averted.

I don’t know what happened to him, but I most certainly remember Aroden’s unique abilities and fighting style from our numerous encounters. If ever he returns to the world of mortals, I would most certainly like to settle my score.

ARODEN  CR 30

Advanced Azlanti Human Wizard (Sword Binder) 20/Champion 10

LN Medium Humanoid (human, mythic) Init +39M  Senses Arcane Sight, Aura Sight, Read Magic, See Invisibility, Speechreader’s Sight, Perception +37 DEFENSE AC 60 touch 37, flat-footed 49 (+9 armor, +7 shield, +10 dex, +7 natural, +5 deflection, +11 luck, +1 insight) hp 522 (20d6+450) Fort +31, Ref +32, Will +38; Defensive Abilities: Defensive Feedback, Force of Will, Hard to Kill, Immortal, Mythic Saving Throws, Pure Destiny, Recuperation, Unstoppable, Immune ability damage, ability drain, aging, bleed, charm, compulsion effects, curses, death effects, disease, energy drain, insanity, petrification, poison SR 35 (arcane spells only)

OFFENSE

Space 5 feet Reach 5 ft Speed 30 Melee Aroden’s Diamond Sword +39/+34 (1d8+18/19-20/x2), Shield of Aroden +39/+34 (1d4+11), helmet +35/+31 (1d4+7) Ranged +1 Greater Designating Second Chance Seeking Longbow +32/+27 (1d8+14/x3) Special Attacks Always a Chance, Channel Power, Fleet Charge, Glorious Blade, Human Paragon 13/day, Legendary Champion, Mythic Power (23/day, surge +1d12), Shielding Weapon, Sword of the Mage 28/day, Wild Arcana

Spell Like Abilities (CL 24th, concentration +35, 1/day for each level, DC 21+spell level)

9th-Foresight, Gate, Mage’s Disjunction, Miracle, Prismatic Sphere, Summon Monster IX

8th-Discern Location, Holy Aura, Mass Cure Critical Wounds, Mind Blank, Protection from Spells, Shield of Law,

7th-Dictum, Holy Sword, Legend Lore, Refuge, Repulsion, Spell Turning

6th-Antimagic Field, Find the Path, Heroes’ Feast, Hold Monster, Undeath to Death

5th-Dispel Chaos, Righteous Might, Spell Resistance, Telepathic Bond, True Seeing

4th-Divination, Order’s Wrath, Holy Smite, Imbue with Spell Ability, Spell Immunity

3rd-Dispel Magic, Magic Circle Against Chaos, Prayer, Protection from Energy, Searing Light, Speak with Dead

2nd-Align Weapon, Bless Weapon, Comprehend Languages, Magic Mouth, Shield Other

1st-Bless, Comprehend Languages, Identify, Protection from Chaos, Sanctuary, Shield of Faith Spells Known (CL 24th, concentration +39) (DC 25+spell level) 9th—Aroden’s SpellbaneM, AscensionM, Foresight, Mage’s Disjunction, Mass Last Azlanti’s Defending Sword, WishM

8th—Dimensional LockM, Frightful Aspect, Iron Body, Mind Blank, Moment of Prescience, Trap the Soul 7th—Aroden’s Magic Army, Delayed Blast Fireball, Greater Teleport, Instant Summons, Limited Wish, Quickened Displacement, Quickened Protection from Energy 6th—Borrowed TimeM, ContingencyM, Greater Dispel Magic, Mage’s Decree, Mass Human Potential, TransformationM, True Seeing 5th—Banishing Blade, Fabricate, Grand Destiny, Greater Guardian Monument, Lend Path, Overland Flight, Wall of Force

4th—Dimensional Anchor, Dimension DoorM, Create Armaments, Fear, Mythic Severance, Resilient Sphere, Telekinetic Charge

3rd—Aroden’s Spellsword, Daylight, Dispel Magic, Fireball, Greater Magic Weapon, HasteM, HeroismM, Vampiric Touch 2nd—Continual Flame, False Life, Force Sword, Intensified Shocking Grasp, Splinter Spell Resistance, Stricken Heart, Whispering Wind, Winged Sword

1st—Alarm, Expeditious Construction, Floating Disk, Heightened Awareness, Linked Legacy, Long Arm, Magic Missile, Unseen Servant 0 (at will)—Detect Magic, Mage Hand, Mending, Prestidigitation STATISTICS Str 36, Dex 30, Con 26, Int 40, Wis 30, Cha 32 Base Atk +10; CMB +38; CMD 58 Feats: Alertness, Arcane StrikeM, Craft Magical Arms and Armor, Craft Wondrous Item, Critical Focus, Dual PathM (Archmage), Endurance, Extra Path AbilityM, Inscribe Magical Tattoos, Mythic Spell LoreM, Heighten Spell, Improved InitiativeM, Improved Shield Bash, Intensify Spell, Quicken Spell, Scribe Scroll, Shield Master, Shield Slam, Two-Weapon Fighting Skills Acrobatics +33, Appraise +38, Bluff +34, Climb +36, Craft (all) +38, Diplomacy +34, Disable Device +33, Disguise +34, Escape Artist +33, Fly +33, Handle Animal +34, Heal +33, Intimidate +34, Knowledge (All) +38, Linguistics +38, Perception +37, Perform +34, Profession (all) +33, Ride +33, Sense Motive +37, Spellcraft +38 Stealth +33, Survival +33, Swim +36, Use Magic Device +34 Languages Aboleth, Abyssal, Aklo, Aquan, Auran, Azlanti, Celestial, Common, Elven, Ignan, Infernal, Terran, Thassilonian, probably a bunch more I never heard him speak, Tongues SQ Amazing Initiative, Arcane Bond (Aroden’s Diamond Longsword), Crusader (score 35), Divine Source (Community, Glory, Knowledge, Law, Magic, Protection), Efficient Creator, Exceptional Stats, Fortified by Prophecy, Knowledge is Power, Legendary Hero, Legendary Item (Aroden’s Diamond Sword, Dedicated Bond, Eternal Bond, Foe-Biting, Perfect Surge, Powerful, Rejuvenating, Returning x2, Undetectable, Unstoppable Strike), Mythic Craft Combat Gear +1 Adamantine Spiked Gauntlet, +1 Cold Iron Spiked Gauntlet, +1 Elysian Bronze Blade Boot, +1 Dueling Inubrex Dwarven Boulder Helmet, +1 Greater Designating Second Chance Seeking Longbow +1, Silver Blade Boot, Amethyst Pyramid Ioun Stone, Amulet of Natural Armor +5, Aroden’s Diamond Sword, Belt of Physical Perfection +6, Bouncing Metamagic Rod, Cracked Dusty Rose Prism Ioun Stone, Dark Blue Rhomboid Ioun Stone, Dusty Rose Prism Ioun Stone, Dazing Metamagic Rod, Disruptive Metamagic Rod, Empower Metmagic Rod, Extend Metamagic Rod x3, Greater Authoritative Metamagic Rod, Greater Enlarge Metamagic Rod, Greater Extend Metamagic Rod x2, Greater Merciful Metamagic Rod, Greater Maximize Metamagic Rod, Greater Quicken Metamagic Rod, Greater Reach Metamagic Rod, Greater Silent Metamagic Rod, Headband of Mental Superiority +6, Iridescent Spindle Ioun Stone, Lesser Extend Metamagic Rod x5, Lesser Intensified Metmagic Rod, Lingering Metamagic Rod, Nectar of the Gods x10, Pauldrons of Unflinching Fortitude, Persistent Metamagic Rod, Quicken Metamagic Rod, Ring of Continuation, Ring of Protection +5, Robes of Azlant, Rod of Absorption, Spellbooks containing every spell he has ever created, Scarlet and Green Cabochen Ioun Stone, Threnodic Metamagic Rod, Wand of Aroden’s Spellsword (50 charges), Western Star Ioun Stone

Efficient Creator (Su): Aroden can craft mundane items as if they were magic items for the purpose of determining the speed of creation.

Exceptional Stats (Ex): Aroden was born a perfect specimen of humanity. As a result, his ability scores were generated using 25 points, rather than using the standard 15 point buy used to create most NPCs. Aroden also has increased all of his ability scores by 5 through use of the Wish spell. Additionally, Aroden has much more gear than an NPC of her level would normally have. These modifications increase his total CR by 2.

Fortified by Prophecy (Ex): Aroden adds his Charisma modifier as a luck bonus to his Armor Class, his attack rolls, and on all of his saving throws, and adds his Charisma modifier to his Constitution modifier for the purpose of determining his hit points. This ability increases his total CR by 1.

Glorious Blade (Su): When Aroden attacks with a sword (including swordlike effects created by spells such as spiritual weapon, as long as they require attack rolls), he can expend a prepared spell as a free action to gain an insight bonus on the attack roll equal to the level of the prepared spell expended.

Human Paragon (Ex): Embodying humanity’s innate versatility, Aroden possesses a much wider variety of abilities than even most humans. He is able to use the Martial Flexibility ability of a 20th-level Brawler, save that he can select non-combat feats in addition to combat feats. Aroden is considered to have 20 levels in every class and a base attack bonus equal to his class level for the purpose of meeting the prerequisites for feats, and is proficient with all forms of weapons and armor. In addition, he is considered to have 20 ranks in all skills and considers all skills to be class skills. This ability increases his CR by 1.

Immortal (Ex): Aroden’s immense magical abilities have sustained his lifespan for an extended period. He gains the +3 bonus to Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma scores for having lived beyond venerable age, but he doesn’t gain the penalties to Strength, Dexterity, and Constitution resulting from this advanced age. Aroden’s supernaturally empowered life grants him complete immunity to ability damage and drain, aging, charm and compulsion effects, death effects, disease, energy drain, petrification, poison, and all forms of madness (including confusion effects and feeblemind). This ability increases his total CR by 1.

Mythic Contingencies (Sp): Aroden has established numerous mythic contingencies, activating the following spells with maximum mythic augmentation under the following conditions.

When Aroden bangs his sword on his shield, he activates a Globe of Invulnerability centered on himself.

Aroden possesses a crystal filling in his mouth that, when pressed with his tongue, transports him to a hidden demiplane using Plane Shift

When Aroden draws his sword, he activates a Transformation effect

When Aroden clicks his heels together, he is affected by both Invisibility and Silence

Finally, when Aroden shouts his iconic Azlanti battle cry (something like “Steel your form and mind.” Honestly I’ve heard better), he activates a Wreath of Blades spell on himself.

Permanent Spells (Sp): Aroden has the following spells affecting him permanently: Arcane Sight, Aura Sight, Read Magic, See Invisibility, Speechreader’s Sight, Soul Vault, and Tongues

Shielding Weapon (Su): As an immediate action, when he casts an abjuration spell, Aroden can gain a bonus equal to 1½ times the level of the spell cast.

ARODEN’S DIAMOND SWORD

Aura: overwhelming all; CL: 20th

Slot: none; Weight 6 lbs.

DESCRIPTION

+5 Axiomatic Phase Locking Spell-Storing Throneglass Longsword was forged by Aroden’s own hand during the height of Azlant, and through his magics he has insured that no other creature may wield it so long as he exists (that...didn’t exactly work out for him). In addition to being phenomenally potent as a weapon, Aroden’s Diamond Longsword can also be used as a substitute for any focus components needed for spellcasting. Spells with expensive spell components cast using the Diamond Sword as an Arcane Bond focus require no material components and do not provoke attacks of opportunity.

DESTRUCTION

Aroden’s Diamond Sword shatters if it is used by a deceitful or traitorous human leader to strike down another more worthy of their position.

ROBES OF AZLANT

Aura: overwhelming all; CL: 20th

Slot: body; Weight 12 lbs.

DESCRIPTION Although they are typically depicted as robes, Aroden’s signature garment is actually a +5 determination glamered heavy fortification vigilant spiked mithral chain shirt with several other unique properties. The Robes of Azlant increase the caster level of the wearer by 4 and possess 4 pockets that function as handy haversacks. When worn by a lawful creature, the Robes of Azlant possess no maximum dexterity bonus and actually reduces any arcane spell failure chance the wielder possesses by 15% (this allows to cast with no chance of failure while carrying a heavy wooden shield). When worn by a chaotic creature, they immediately gain 10 negative levels. These negative levels cannot be removed so long as such an individual wears these robes, but all but two are removed when they take the robes off. These negative levels never kill the wearer, always leaving them with the maximum number of negative levels they can suffer while remaining alive. However, for each negative level negated in this way, the armor cannot be removed for one year.

DESTRUCTION

The Robes of Azlant can be destroyed if it is donned by a chaotic evil Alghollthu. The robes transform and crush the creature to death, ripping themselves apart in the process

Tactics

Most would think that Aroden would fight fair, using fairly conventional tactics in a battle. Here’s an index of some of the more dirty tricks this bastard pulled against me.

-Aroden’s Spellsword. The champion of humanity built this spell himself and exploits it to an incredible degree. His sword carries a rod, obviously, but also his shield, both his gauntlets, his two blade boots, his helmet, his armor spikes, and all four of the daggers he uses for his Wreath of Blades spell. I’ve seen the maniac polymorph himself into some downright ridiculous forms for the sake of grabbing even more weapons (or natural weapons) so he can subsume rods into them and throw copious amounts of metamagic on any spell he casts. On a few occasions I have seen him stuff multiple instances of the same rod into a weapon through numerous castings of the spell so that he doesn’t have to reload.

-The Human Paragon ability has innumerable aggravating uses, extending far beyond the addition of extra combat feats in the heat of the moment (although Aroden has been known to use it for that purpose). Most notably, this ability can be used to grab Spell Perfection for any spell he knows and any metamagic feats that he wishes to boost it with, resulting in an obscene degree of versatility

-Aroden’s Spellbane. I helped him a bit on the research for this one and I most certainly regret it. He usually casts this spell at the start of the day, always making sure to block out Antimagic Field, Greater Dispel Magic, and Mage’s Disjunction so that nobody can get the drop on him without his various boons. I’ve seen him negate healing spells on a few occasions, and at one point opted to negate numerous wall and sphere spells so that nobody would be able to trap him. That said, his most devious tactic has been using a combination of Long Arm, Frightful Aspect, and a Widened Antimagic field to swipe at disempowered opponents without losing his own numerous boons (the bastard usually grabs step up, disruptive, and spellbreaker as well, so escape becomes rather difficult).

- Aroden is almost never alone, and will usually fight alongside his entourage of champions known as the Paragons of Humanity. These Paragons are Einherjar of various alignments (most often lawful, as Aroden loved his supplicants) who have enough templates and class levels in various combinations to each be CR 20. At least 6 Paragons accompany Aroden at any given time in addition to his cohort (whatever poor, idealistic warrior he was able to goad into service at the time).

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[the-master-cylinder]

What are you doing with Ghoulies II? Charles Band: That should be fun. Ed Naha’s writing the script. It’s still a bit early to talk about exactly what the plan is , but we’ll shoot this year and have it out next year. We’ll have some fun with it. Ghoulies not only did well at the box office not a blockbuster, but it did well but it has done huge videocassette business. It’s one of the top 10 or 15 video releases of ’85. and it has been sold to cable and syndication. That just means that for whatever reason, people like it. In my opinion, it’s a very weak film, but it had a few redeeming moments. I hope that in the sequel, we’ll be able to take what was good about the original and do that throughout the entire picture.

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Vicious Lips (1986) Sometime in the distant future, a fledgling band gets an opportunity for a breakthrough, if they can make it in time to a faraway planet to perform in a very popular club.

Ghoulies II (1987) Ghoulies are shanghaied by a priest who intends to exterminate them, but they manage to escape to a low-rent carnival. There they take up residence in “Satan’s Den,” a foundering, old-fashioned haunted house attraction run by Royal Dano, who fears he may lose ownership of the show due to sagging attendance. The presence of the ghoulies at first gives business a much-needed boost … until the slimy little buggers start dining on the patrons.

At first, Empire Pictures president Charles Band couldn’t find anyone who would touch the project unless changes were made in the script. something he was adamantly opposed to doing. Finally, he took it to the one person he knew he could trust to make the movie exactly the way he wanted it, a man with both the talent and experience in low-budget filmmaking to pull it off, the same man who had, in fact, taught him everything he knew about the motion picture business: his father, Albert Band, an old hand at horror.

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Ghoulies II, the director is completely in charge, seems quite happy with the results and expects that the sequel will do even better than its successful predecessor. Not that he really has the time to sit and worry about it; Empire Pictures has 12 more movies due before Christmas, which means everybody at Empire has to hustle. And nobody hustles with any greater enthusiasm or verve than Albert Band, the company’s executive vice president of production.

“Albert has as much energy as any of the teenagers in my crew.” praises John Buechler, whose ability to whip up monsters faster than a short order cook flips burgers has made him an integral part of Empire’s operation. Buechler has worked with Papa Band a number of times. “He has a strong background in filmmaking and he knows exactly what he wants.”

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He should, having been in show business for four decades as a producer, writer and director. “Actually.” confesses Band, producing is what I enjoy the most. I only became a director to save myself a director’s salary.”

“Albert wrote a helluva good script,” says Royal Dano, one of the cast members. In Ghoulies II, Dano portrays the drunken operator of a sideshow attraction who accidentally picks up the dreaded title creatures.

To that end, David Allen, whose special FX have enhanced many of Empire’s pictures, was brought onto the project. According to him, the reason the FX succeed is that Band was willing to spend whatever it took to make them that way.

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“I’ve never actually worked with him on the set.” Allen reveals, but I know he cares about the pictures. If he didn’t there have certainly been times, especially on Ghoulies II, when he could have made more economical choices.”

As with most Empire movies, the principal photography was completed in Rome, where near-freezing temperatures gave birth to one of the fastest-moving crews in movie history. “They wanted to get the hell out of there,” confirms actor Dano, who had the foresight to pack long thermal underwear.

Directed by Peter Manoogian, produced by Band and distributed by Empire. Enemy Territory (1987) Barry (Frank) is a formerly successful insurance executive whose career and life are being destroyed by alcoholism. As the day ends, he is sent to a notorious New York City housing project, the Lincoln Towers, to try and complete a life insurance policy sale to a nice elderly woman named Elva (Frances Foster). Meanwhile, a man named Will (Parker), a soft-spoken but tough employee of the telephone company, also heads to the building to hook up with his girlfriend and repair the phone lines. Unfortunately for Barry, while inquiring where Elva’s apartment is, he taps a boy, Decon (Theo Caesar) on the shoulder and quickly becomes the hated target of a savage, fanatical gang called the Vampires, who run the Towers. They’re led by their ruthless but charismatic leader the Count (Tony Todd), who runs his gang like a cult and is seen to be indestructible by himself and his followers. An attempt to kill Barry leads to the deaths of the building’s security guard and Decon. With Barry’s entrapment inside the building, he crosses paths with Will and makes his first reluctant ally willing to help him. They take safety in Elva’s apartment, but escape when the Vampires trap them. Leaving Elva behind, they find Elva’s determined granddaughter Toni (Stacey Dash), visiting with her neighbors. Toni suggests they go to the apartment of Mr. Parker (Vincent), a bigoted, crippled and unstable but yet still vicious Vietnam vet the gang fears (along the way Barry is forced to kill one of the gang members leaving him with mild PTSD). Paid for his help, Parker lets the trio in (revealing he’s modified a wheelchair with an arsenal of concealed weapons). Then Toni leaves to check on her grandmother, but when she arrives, she discovers Elva had been beaten and forced to reveal where Barry and Will are.

The Vampires, holding Elva and Toni hostage, arrive at Parker’s apartment with Barry surrendering himself to save them. As Barry and Will exit, Parker and the Vampires engage in a shootout. In the midst of the gunfire, Barry, Will, and Toni escape. When Elva and Parker retreat back inside his apartment, Parker is shot in the chest and a short time later dies as Elva struggles to save him. Next, the trio head to the apartment of Chet Cole (Deon Richmond), a little boy, living with his mother, whom they heard is the only one who knows a way out of the building that no one else knows, not even the Vampires. According to Chet, the way out is in the building’s basement, with Chet offering to show them, but his mother sends him to bed, leading him to sneak out.

After saving them from being killed by Psycho (Robert Lee Rush), the Count’s crazed relative (by knocking said gang member down a elevator shaft with a baseball bat), Chet joins the trio as they descend to the basement through said elevator shaft. In the basement, Chet shows them the way out, but the opening is too small for either Barry or Will to fit through. Toni however is able to fit through (but as she is leaving, gets grabbed by a badly injured Psycho who Barry forcibly finishes off with some power tools) and runs to get the police. But when she arrives at the station, the officers refuse to help, due to two cops being shot on a previous visit to the building.

While Barry and Will wait, Will comes up with another plan. Using the money that Elva gave Barry earlier in the film, they send Chet back upstairs. With sunrise approaching, Chet litters the money out a window to the Vampires guarding the basement door to the outside. At the same time, the Count and other Vampires realize that after checking every apartment in the building the basement is the only place left to look (on entering said basement the Count is stunned to see Psycho is dead). When the money distraction works, Barry and Will escape just as the Count and his remaining Vampires arrive, and Barry is shot in the ankle.

Outside, Will and a wounded Barry start running as they are being chased and tormented by the last of the gang (with the Count ordering his followers to let him avenge Decon and Psycho). Cornered, Will uses the one shot he has left in his gun to protect Barry and himself, he does this by having a final showdown with the Count. As the Count closes in, Will shoots and struggles with him, until he knocks him briefly to the ground. The Vampires are momentarily demoralized when they see the Count is not invulnerable, despite his claims he still is, with Barry using this distraction to slam a swing seat into his head repeatedly until the Count collapses and dies while the other Vampires, now enraged at their leader’s death prepare to gun down Barry and Will. But Elva, using Parker’s machine gun, fires shots at them from the apartment window to hold them at bay. Seconds later, Toni and the police finally arrive, with the remaining gang members fleeing back into the apartment complex. Having survived a deadly night against a vicious gang, the film ends with Will and Toni accompanying Barry as he is taken to an ambulance.

Catacombs (1988), Concept Art

Catacombs (1988) In the 17th century, an order of monks in Italy capture and entomb a demon that has possessed a member of their group. 400 years later, school teacher Elizabeth Magrino (Laura Schaefer) visits the monastery in order to do some research. What she and the current monks do not realize is that the evil hiding within the catacombs has unwittingly been released.

Despite a somewhat hackneyed story, an ancient evil buried in the title location beneath a remote monastery, and the utterly insane casting of Timothy Van Patten as a monk, this is a pretty good little film. Emphasis is on mood instead of gore and there is an honest attempt to develop the characters before they become victims of the revived terror. Director Schmoeller makes good use of his European locales and piles the atmospheric visuals on thick to make a film that could almost pass for genuine Italian semi-classic from the heyday of Mario Bava.

The film was the last officially completed film by Empire Pictures before the company was seized by Crédit Lyonnais for failure to pay on loans. As a result, the film’s release was delayed for five years. It was eventually given the new title Curse IV: The Ultimate Sacrifice by Columbia TriStar Home Video, and was released direct-to-video on VHS in 1993.

Transformations (1988) Wolfgang is traveling in outer space when a monster, which he sees as a beautiful woman, appears in his spaceship and makes love with him. Then the ship is forced to land on a planet which is a penal colony. Here he meets Miranda who falls in love with him. A group of prisoners uses him and his spaceship to fly away from the planet. But the monster which is by now inside Wolfgang arouses and only Miranda’s love can save him.

Arena (1989) Steve Armstrong (Paul Satterfield) is working as a short order cook on a space station somewhere in the galaxy. Overwhelmed by the volume of orders, he repeatedly fouls up and soon finds himself in a confrontation with an alien patron named Vang. After a fight which smashes up the diner and leaves the alien injured, Steve and his friend and co-worker Shorty (Hamilton Camp) are fired. As it turns out, Vang is an Arena fighter, and his manager Quinn (Claudia Christian) confronts Steve. Amazed that a human could beat one of her best fighters, Quinn offers him a contract, but convinced that humans no longer have a place in the Arena, Steve refuses, intending to make his way back to Earth.

Lacking sufficient money for a ticket, Shorty attempts to raise the cash by gambling in an underground casino. The game is raided by the authorities and in the confusion, Shorty pockets the money. Caught in the act by crime boss Rogor (Marc Alaimo) and his enforcer Weezil (Armin Shimerman), Shorty is held for ransom. Steve promises to pay off the debt, so he reluctantly returns to Quinn and agrees to a contract. Remarkably he wins his first match with an alien named Sloth in an upset. He continues fighting, determined to prove that a human has what it takes to be champion, and soon becomes a top contender. Despite Rogor’s multiple attempts to cheat, Steve ultimately wins the championship from Rogor’s top fighter, an alien named Horn (Michael Deak).

Deadly Weapon (1989) A teenager named Zeke, who fantasizes that he is from outer space, is bullied by some other teens at school and deals with a drunken father, runaway mother and a sister who delights in being nasty to him. He finds a lost experimental military weapon in a river near his home. The weapon fires anti-gravity X-rays. Zeke uses it for self-defense as a means to deal with his persecutors, both at school and at home.

An army team led by the overzealous Lt. Dalton, responsible for originally losing the weapon, is sent to recover the weapon before its unstable reactor overloads and causes a meltdown. The situation degenerates into a siege.

Michael Miner

Although planned as a sequel to Laserblast, while writing the script – and partially due to financial constraints, Band and Miner decided to make an original film, based on the central idea.

Michael Miner,  who had just finished co-writing RoboCop with Edward Neumeier, saw in that Deadly Weapon poster the chance to “blast the Spielberg mythical suburbia and the warmth of childhood,” to create a “neo-Lucas, neo-Spielberg flick.

More than that, it was a chance to direct, an opportunity Miner missed out on when his then in-production RoboCop blossomed from a low-budget picture into a big-budget, extravaganza that the studio felt had to be given to a veteran director.

So, Miner called a physicist friend, quizzed him about the kinds of weapons scientists have on paper these days, and found his deadly weapon-an anti-matter pistol powered by a “backpack reactor about the size of two shoe boxes.” Then, he and writer friend George Lafia started thinking-what if the transport train carrying this hi-tech weapon derails, and the gun is found by “a 15-year-old, heavy metal loser?”

They had their movie. A concept that Miner’s RoboCop partner Ed Neumeier neatly boiled down to four simple sentences: “He’s 15. He’s got nuclear capability. He’s got 24 hours to live. He’s the kid with the ray gun.” Charles Band was sold.

The film was shot in May and June of 1987 at various locations around Southern California on a budget of $2 million. Although the budget restricted Miner somewhat, he doesn’t resent the limitation. “Empire gave me the permission to make a dark film with a dark ending. I think it takes a little company like Empire to make a picture like this –people who want to make interesting pictures and are willing to allow the freedom necessary to do it.”

“The upside was I could pretty much do what I wanted,” says Miner. “I had a pretty long leash. The downside was I could only work with $3 million.”

The budget obviously limited the scope of the special effects used, but Miner made do with what he could afford. Whenever Zeke shoots the pistol, he’s hit by an air cannon and a reactive light, with the desired effect being that of an exploding concussion grenade. The pistol is used several times in the film, setting the target on fire each time, and there’s one particularly notable shot of a head bursting into flames and writhing (an articulated puppet head was used for this).

Miner sees Deadly Weapon as “science fiction meets Badlands” and insists it’s not just another exploitation flick. “At its root, it’s a personal film, but there’s a mean edge to it,” he says. “I’m very proud of Deadly Weapon. I think I did a good job.”

Miner hopes to reach a young audience with the picture. “The film starts off being a Charles Bronson type revenge picture and then takes that desire for revenge and puts it into the mind of a 15 year-old who is still wavering about what to do,” said Miner.

Spellcaster (1991) Orphaned siblings Jackie and Tom are elated to be chosen to participate in a treasure hunt alongside other players, for a prize of one million dollars. Set in an Italian castle owned by the mysterious Diablo, all they must do to win the contest is be the first to find the check. Also hunting for the money are several others that are highly competitive and willing to do anything to win. The contest is to be recorded for a MTV-esque music channel and sponsored by the recording company of pop star Cassandra Castle, who is to accompany the contestants throughout the hunt along with VJ Rex. Cassandra, however, is unwilling to spend any time with the contestants and prefers to spend all of her time drinking excessively in her private room. Upon a whim Cassandra makes a deal with Rex to hide the money on her person so none of the contestants can find it. Upon the end of the competition the two will split the winnings.

Once the contest begins the contestants begin a frantic search for the check, unaware of Cassandra’s duplicity or that supernatural forces are picking the players off one by one. Cassandra’s plans are waylaid when the forces begin to torment her and cause her to lose the check, which is carried throughout the castle on a magical breeze. Eventually only Jackie, Cassandra, and Tom are left, upon which point they are unable to ignore that something is very wrong. As Jackie frantically searches for answers she discovers a room at the top of the castle containing a crystal ball and Diablo, who reveals himself to be a demon. He also tells her that he has captured the souls of the other contestants in the sphere and will take them all to Hell, as well as that his next victim will be her brother. Meanwhile Cassandra and Tom have romantically connected with one another. He also discovers the check, which has landed near him and Cassandra. Tom is shocked when Cassandra chooses to burn the check and warns him that the money comes with strings attached that he wouldn’t want. She throws the check into a fireplace, only Diablo to magically summon her to his room and chastise her for ruining his plans, revealing that Cassandra had formed a contract with him and that he will be taking her soul to Hell as well. In exchange for her soul she gained fame and wealth, which she quickly realized was not worth the bargain and took to alcohol and drugs to numb herself to her reality. In order to save both Tom and Cassandra Jackie tries to bargain with Diablo, offering her soul in exchange for the both of them. Horrified, Cassandra chooses to destroy Diablo’s crystal ball, which puts an end to his evil plans and brings all of the contestants back to life. This also frees Cassandra, who reveals that she convinced Diablo to give her back her soul and to instead VJ at the music channel. The film closes with Diablo hosting a music broadcast and announcing a new contest that will bring him all new victims.

The film began shooting during July 1986 near Rome, Italy. Executive producer Charles Band allowed the filming to take place in a 12th century castle he had purchased for filmmaking, Castello di Giove. Spellcaster’s script was written by Dennis Paoli and Ed Naha, frequent collaborators with Stuart Gordon. The film was produced by Band’s Empire Pictures, which went defunct in 1988, and Spellcaster’s release was delayed until 1992, when it was released through Columbia TriStar Home Pictures.

Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death (1989) The U.S. government, eager to protect the nation’s avacado supplies, recruits feminist professor Margo Hunt to make contact with the Piranha Women, an all-female tribe who believe men are only good as a source of food. Accompanying Dr. Hunt on her trip are Jim, a guide of questionable competence, and Bunny, a student of unquestionable incompetence.

Robot Jox (1989) Retrospective The reasons for the prolonged delay for Robot Jox (1989) are numerous, all related to the toppling of Band’s Empire beneath the weight of a staggering $46 million in debts. Empire ran out of money when the company saw the film’s budget balloon from $7 to $9 million. Whether due to inferior product or the company’s attempt to distribute its own films, Band was forced to relinquish control of Empire and regroup under the banner The Band Company (its video arm called Half Moon Productions), where Gordon has an office on a film-by-film arrangement. (TWE now owns the Empire catalog, including films that were not yet complete at the time of the takeover.)

Gordon scoffs at the industry talk that Robot Jox was responsible for the fall of the Band Empire. “I don’t believe that this picture sunk Empire, though it certainly didn’t help,” he admitted. “It is true, however, that it was the most expensive picture Empire ever produced-three or four times their normal budget. It also had the longest post-production schedule. But even if everything had gone like clockwork, it would still have required a year of post. Charlie had envisioned that Robot Jox would put Empire on the map, financially speaking. Unfortunately we were not able to get the movie done in time to save the company.”

Even though Empire was clearly in the midst of severe financial woes by this time, Allen insists that he was never pressured by Band to finish. “He understood what we were battling, which was the weather. Empire’s loan money was costing them interest, but we weren’t that expensive-our effects came in at less than 25% of total budget.”

But Band’s video Empire was about to fall. Explained Band, “Basically, in a nutshell, we had some bad timing. We’d just set up a big operation in Italy and suddenly the dollar absolutely fell apart and the cost of living in Italy quadrupled, so suddenly we were in the wrong country in terms of getting a shop set up and making movies. We were there to save money, and the last few pictures we made at Empire cost 20 or 30% more than it would have to make them in this country, which is totally insane considering that just to shoot the picture offshore there is an awful lot of effort that goes into traveling, etc.”

Added Albert Band, “In the beginning, you got 2000 lira to the dollar. When we left, it was 600. The whole Italian experience marked us for life, me and my children, because those years were very formative, not just in growing up, but growing up in a different culture, living with a different language, making movies we liked, building an empire.”

What happened to Empire Pictures? Charles Band: The problems really were two-fold. There were all the normal problems with all the independents because the business has changed radically. These independents, including Empire, became too big too fast, driven by a worldwide home video fever that dried up. The fever mainly for B movies in the home video markets was very forgiving; anything sold. Today, it’s just not the case. It’s an A-driven market, but the occasional B movie will work. The premise of Empire in the early ’80s made sense, but in the late ’80s, it makes no sense. Control your own distribution? That’s not necessary today. Make 4,000 movies a year? You can’t do that anymore.

The other thing that happened to Empire is that in the early days, when we made a dozen or so video hits, pictures that did very well internationally as well, we sold the rights to several video distributors at a bargain price. Had Empire been able to control its own video destiny while the video world was exploding, and reaped the benefits of its video successes, it would not have had any financial problems.

Typically, we would make a picture on a small loss, assuming we would see overages from video, but the deal we made from video, which would sometimes help get the picture made, just didn’t have a chance of showing us overages because it was written in such a way that we would have to sell truckloads of tapes to make any money beyond the advance. It doesn’t take too many of those kind of movies to ultimately create a deficit. Empire never had any huge amount of debt, but the only way it would have been able to turn itself around would have been to get a lot more money to make bigger movies and do business differently. It got to be very wearying at the end, as well. You have to be on call morning and night to the banks you’re involved with, and that’s just not what I wanted to do.

So you were operating on a kind of brinksmanship policy that worked fine when the market was flush, but when the market went away, you toppled over the brink? Charles Band: Yes. Some companies went down in flames, other companies went bankrupt. Neither of these things happened to Empire. It was a graceful end to a five-year history of making 50-odd movies. And I left with an enormous amount of experience, hopefully some of it useful to me now, and with a rare opportunity in a whole new world to start again, in a sense, but doing things the right way. I’ve been very, very lucky. 1988 was a great year for me. I’ve no regrets.

The quality of the Empire movies varied, and tended downward somewhat over the years. Charles Band: I don’t know how to say it without sounding like I did everything over there, which I clearly didn’t, but the less time I spent involved in a production, the less the picture showed any real magic. We had good filmmakers and bad filmmakers; we took chances with a lot of new filmmakers, and some of those worked out real well and some were disappointments. The earlier pictures, even though they were all modest efforts, were better than the later ones, because for the last year and a half of Empire, I barely had five percent of my time and energy left to deal with filmmaking. That’s why with the new companies, I plan to do just one thing, and that is to make these pictures.

At Empire, I spent most of my time dealing with things that were outside what I love doing, which is making movies and being on a motion picture set. So I decided to set up my new life in a way that would really divide the two areas I wanted to concentrate in. I set up Bandcompany and Full Moon Productions. Bandcompany basically will be making one or two larger-budgeted films a year, the first one of which is Pit and the Pendulum , which Stuart Gordon is directing in Italy. There are a couple of others in preparation that will probably wind up being deals directly with studios, where we won’t be involved in any of the sales or marketing, but those movies are few and far between. Sometimes, seven or eight months go by between projects. Sometimes years, if you’re really unlucky.

Why were so many films still on the shelf when Empire was sold? Charles Band: Because for the final four or five months, the president of Empire, the chief financial operator and myself were trying to convince the banks to allow Empire to change course. There was a whole list of things we wanted to do, and it required more money. During that period, we had films that would have fit nicely into that new Empire; we didn’t want to give every last film away to various home video companies. We wanted to start off with a bit of a head start. So there was a kind of moratorium put on finishing certain pictures, selling certain pictures. We kind of kept everything to try and make this deal. When the deal didn’t work out the way I wanted it and this other offer came about, another four or five months went by, only because it takes that much time for new people to come in and figure out what they’ve got. So the pictures are being finished, and now through God knows what convoluted deal they are coming out. There were about seven or eight of them, the best of which, the absolutely last picture Empire made, was Robot Jox. It would be ironic if’ it became a big hit.

CREDITS/REFERENCES/SOURCES/BIBLIOGRAPHY love-it-loud.co.uk Cinefantastique v13n06 Cinefantastique v12n02 Cinefantastique v15n04 Cinefantastique v15n02 Cinefantastique v16n01 Cinefantastique Vol 08 No 2-3 Cinefantastique v18n02-03 (March 1988)3 DELIRIUM#01 DELIRIUM#03 DELIRIUM#04 DELIRIUM#05 FANGORIA#30 FANGORIA#202 FANGORIA#190 FANGORIA#54 FANGORIA#56 FANGORIA#57 FANGORIA#215 FANGORIA#69 MONSTERLAND#39 MONSTERLAND#10 GOREZONE #8 starburstmagazine#03 mjsimpson-films Famous Monsters of Filmland#161 tomboftheunproducedhorrormovie comingsoon.com Starlog#127 Rue Morgue#136 Horrorfan#03 Femme Fatales v09n07 Draculina#14 The Dark Side#28

The History of Empire Films Part Six What are you doing with Ghoulies II? Charles Band: That should be fun. Ed Naha's writing the script.

[thoughtprovoke]

Considering myself an auto-didact, I always taught myself everything that I know apart from the first basics which I learned in school, such As the alphabet and how to read and write, and my first basic math lessons. I do remember enjoying history as they taught it, and i believe some of the things i learned at St. Olave’s Boarding School York were the basis of my ability to apply self learning to educate myself, long after i had left school without a single qualification.

In recent years, my self education based in web programming and etymology and lateral thinking, i became very obsessed with educating myself about how Artificial Intelligence may be developed and applied in the present and future, both near and far

The story of Google Deep Mind’s Alpha Go beating an 18 times world champion at the world’s most complex and difficult boardgame GO, rose my interest as to thinking both how the A.I. learns from its own mistakes, how it predicts, and how in game 4 of 5 rounds, the Korean master managed to cause a memory overload by making the A.I. need to look further ahead in the number of moves as it was programmed to do, and tax its own computing power to the point where it became confused.

In my early years when the rest of the kids were playing Basketball or Rugby or Cricket or whatever, i would go to the Library and read Asronomy Books. Computing was not a topic one could find in school libraries in the mid seventies, otherwise i may have interested myself for that as much as i interest myself for algorithms, computing and Artificial Intellligence, in relation with NBature’s Natural Algorithm of Self Learning which we call ‘Darwinian Evolutionary Theory’

I refused to go to school at the age of 13, and didn’t go back until the final term of my 15th year of life. As the exams came up after 2 years of absence, and being in a Cambridge based educational comprehensive state school after having left an Oxford based Jesuit Boarding school in Malta, I walked in with a new tattoo on my arm, and my sleeves rolled up, signed the exam sheets and left them empty, and walked out.

Walked Out of the Exams Without Fillling in a Single Question and Signed my Name

So what does all of this have to do with algorithms? I hear you asking; All I can say to you in answer is “absolutely everything”

Let’s start with the classic scientific definition and current public understanding of the world algorithm in the IT Computing world;



An algorithm is Math based set of instructions which depend on sets of functions, variables, and priorities. An Artificial Intelligence algorithm however, no longer needs the Human to continue teaching it (although Humans will interfere and add code to improve the algorithm when a runtime error or inacccuracy or inefficiency is detected).

Below is an old GCE level computing algorithm tutorial, which even if you dont understand code and computing, will begin to give you an idea about how an algorithm can be built upon.



Perhaps you can then imagine how a point can be reached in the programming, where the machine itself can be set to learn from its own set of varied experiments and attempts to solve or execute programs.

For example, an analytics algorithm could be built in with a runtime error log which would then be combined as machine learning database information after reboot, and the machine would use its ‘memory of the experience’ to avoid making the same mistake twice. But algorithms are not merely computer based, for if Mathematicians are right, it is the process of Evolution itself which uses self learning algorithms in the same way an A.I. program does.

  A further calculation program to analyse alternative possible fails and runtime errors which may occur through similar scenarios would then also be run, and with a series of ifs, and whens, buts and thens, the machine would learn to make the most effective decisions,

The next problem in Artificial Intelligence Algorithm Programming is to decide and understand how to program a set of ethics into the system (see Arthur C. Clarke’s Science Fiction series of books ‘I Robot’ which deals with the 3 laws of robotics, and is a major foundation of the philosophy of most modern Artificial Intelligence Programmers up to the present day, despite being a science fiction novel.

Arthur C. Clarke was also one of the world’s greatest Astronomical Scientists, but also wrote science fiction novels, which have shown great predictive foresight into how the future (our present day) may turn out.

So what do mathematical and A.I. Algorithms have to do with Nature and Evolution?

A.I. Interfacing with Humans Controlling the Decisions over all Important Protocols. This is how we eventually circumvent the problem of how A.I. can remain under Human Control

Will the Biological Entity (Humans) merge with Artificial Intelligence?

The answer to this question is very Easy; We already are doing. Many of us speakj to Siri or Cortana or Google Assistant or similar every day for menial questions, calling up data or commanding basic actions, be it on the device within apps, or with smart home hardware technology in the home.

I can remember seeing various Science Fiction Movies where the Protagonists spoke to the ship they were traveling in or the building they were residing in, and the computer with a background  listener would perform its duties.



In those days, nobody thought o the security issues which would arise with background listening microphones and devices, and webcams, and now we stand between a heaven of Futuristic technology which could make our lives so much easier (or arguably more complicated), and a hell of a Dystopian Future with Big Brother-Like Government Agencies and Companies spying on one’s every private aspect of one’s life, be it physical, medical, mental, habitual, social behavior.. all data gathered from our actions on Facebook, Google, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, and so on, is gathered and analyzed using A.I. to interpret our behavior patterns using Math, This has proved efficient enough that Alpha Go could beat an 18 times world champion 4 out of 5 times in a row.

Will we Blend with Robots AND A.I.?

The answer to this is yes! this is inevitable.

How do Social Networks Use Algorithms to Process and Apply the Knowledge Gained from Our Data and Behaviours? Well, that’s a long topic, and needs many more blogposts to cover the matter properly, but I leave you with some visual food for thought below.

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  Algorithms in Nature and A.I The Code of Self Learning