#I have my exceptions but
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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#ok no but for real this is genuinely my friend group.#the only one that's a little iffy is the anime catgirl bc 98% of us are dudes. with the exception of me and one other#we even have a union guy 😭#side note chilchuck's name would 100% be Chris if he was a real guy. he's such a Chris. (I mean it COULD be chuck but. Chris is better)#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#senshi of izganda#izutsumi#marcille donato#laios touden#chilchuck tims#chilchuck#falin touden#astronomically random
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not to sound like a boomer, but I need some people to learn how to write emails in a semi-professional (at the very least) format so you're not cold emailing a business/potential employer/any other stranger about formal matters in the exact same way you'd DM a close friend on instagram
the formality/language can loosen up in the email chain once you've established a rapport and you match the other person if they're being less formal, but please don't have the very first email you send a stranger be written in all lowercase ultra-casual sms slang with no greeting or signature and a billion emojis
#this sounds like a 'argh kids these days doing [insert exaggerated story they don't actually do in reality]' kind of thing#except that I've gotten soooo many emails like this#there's a reason that I don't have my DMs open on any socmed and it's bc they attract people getting way too casual/parasocial immediately#and forcing people to write out an email both filters out 90% of weird impulse messages and also throws them out of that casual headspace#except that I can actively tell when this fails and someone is treating emails as if they're the same thing as DMs
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so much love for characters who are desperately unsure whether they’re a good person, a redeemable person, a person worth saving, but are absolutely certain that they’re a grade a hottie
#‘can i ever really absolve myself of my crimes? do i even want to? am i guilty everything—or of anything at all?#except for the crime of having an ass too fat i’m never beating those allegations’#ryddles
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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“People are inherently terrible” no!!! Have you ever seen a child wait for their friend while they tie their shoelaces? Have you ever known someone who would bring hurt squirrels and rabbits and mice to the nearest vet just so it doesn’t suffer? Have you seen someone grieve? Have you ever read something that hit your heart like a freight train? Have you looked at the stars and felt an unexplainable joy? Have you ever baked bread? Have you shared a meal with a friend? Have you not seen it? All the love? All the good? I know it’s hard to see sometimes, I know there’s pain everywhere. But look, there’s a child helping another up after a hard fall. Look, there’s someone giving their umbrella to a stranger. Look, there’s someone admiring the spring flowers. Look, there’s good, there’s good, there’s good. Look!!!!
#humans are good actually#humans are strange#hopecore#honey prose#respectfully do not fill my mentions w Christianity references this is NOT a capital G god friendly post#fuck the concept of original sin and also Thomas Hobbes#also for all the vet ppl in the tags saying don’t take a wild animal to the vet pls refer to ‘just so it doesn’t suffer’ IM A VET TECH.#THERE IS ONLY ONE THING WE CAN DO FOR A SMALL WILD ANIMAL THAT IS INJURED .#I’m talking about humane euthanasia for a creature that is clearly suffering when there’s no wildlife conservation for 60+ miles#I’ve actually never had a client that didn’t call to ask to bring it in that didn’t already know and understand euthanasia was all we’d be#able to do.#that’s the kindness part. that’s the love. ‘I can’t do anything except make sure you don’t suffer any longer than u already have since some#asshole ran over your back legs’
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my troubled perfect princess who deserves 400 years in jail <3
#i have Such an obsession with this man's profile i fear this is becoming like a nam seonho circa 2021 moment for me. oh no#iwtv#interview with the vampire#amc iwtv#armand#no one will understand this fuckass reference except maybe my treasured eastern european mutuals (do any of u weirdos watch this show)#but i was listening to Najdraga Moja by toshe proevski while i was sketching these and like. fuck. armand amv moment but truly#можам да не те сакам. не и да заборавам. а за тоа ти си ми должна до крај. like literally lol what if i walk into the ocean#my art#fanart
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uh oh guys new favourite character time
#i seriously have not thought about anything except mizu for like. 2 weeks.#just some studies while i try and learn how to draw her <333#blue eye samurai#bes#mizu blue eye samurai#mizu#phantasymist#art#illustration#my art#procreate#artists of tumblr#artists on tumblr#digital painting#digital art#fanart#blue eye samurai fanart#bes fanart#mizu fanart
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sometimes finding aromanticism in media isn’t literally about aromanticism… sometimes it’s about the deconstruction of love as a concept and the subversion of its perception as inherently humanising. it’s about the decentering of romance as a driving force in the narrative. and also sometimes it’s about love being central to the narrative but in a way that defies all traditional categorisations of romantic / platonic / anything else. it is the secret third thing yet so much more and less at once. the point is aromanticism is everywhere for those with eyes to see
#aromantic#aro#aroace#barely coherent post but do you get what i mean. shakes u by the shoulders. do you get ittttt#like. this isn’t about aromanticism except it is. because my third aromantic eye is open and i see it that way#sometimes it’s about a character having a fucked up concept of love and intimacy.. it’s not aro but it is!#something very deeply aro about much of it.#mossy posts#aspec
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"I'll show you every day that choosing to live was worth it"
some of my favourite scenes from @hijinks-n-lowjinks' fic things i would miss from the other side . this fic tore my heart out fr but like in a good way and i wanted to pay it homage the only way i know how <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#I LOVE PLOTTING AND ALSO SCHEMING#listen i have a lot of feelings and i needed 2 process them and i do that by making art 2 target my mutuals directly#read my about it's there it's in the fineprint if we talk You Are Not Safe smile#i just . BITING BITING BITING this fic#the domesticity the grief the casual yet unfathomably deep soulmatism.......im ruined i tell u Ruined#so naturally i dropped everything#remember how i said lefts/rights r my enemy my beloathed my nemesis. MIRRORS MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE FHGDSAJFGJS I WANTED DEATH#i was like this is incorrect. no this is correct. flips them around in my head. no im wrong again actually#purgatory tbh but we got there (watch me be wrong again tho if i am wrong again i think i will Cry)#anyway!!! i don't have much else to say except pls read the fic and show jinx some love they 1000% deserve it this fic 1000% deserves it#i could only draw so many scenes but i would draw all of it if i could#fr i ws so paranoid abt accuracy lmao cut 2 footage of me looking up rice cooker models and wtf the colour 'carnelian' was#i hope i got everything right i hope i did it justice :'>#also if any1 mentions how megumi's arm in 3 is at an awkward angle. look me in the eye and tell me youve comfortably cuddled with someone#i will call u a liar
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happy borth king <3
#my art#technoblade#technoblade25#someone take the Sporkle away from me#sorry for being late i have no excuses except my mental state has been shit lately
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[Day 277]
Chamber of sea critters 🎣 (im not obsessed with lineless u are)(its so fun KJASDLAJJKA)
#dddaily4sherin#desert duo#grian#goodtimeswithscar#hermitblr#hermitcraft#hermitcraft season 10#my art#this piece is the ultimate form of “I have no clue wtf I'm doing but it is fucking working so I'm not complaining”#so happy with this one fr HSHAEJKEHHE#(except the fact that i went with orange and blue again. i need to learn other color palettes istg LOL)
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Stop light shenanigans
Extra:
#this came to me in the shower as most great thoughts do#I’m so sorry for this LONG ASS POst#Bill Woodward#ted spankoffski#paul matthews#My mom said this was a one one two but with an extra one…. which is boxing talk I guess#Basically ‘’ tom coming in with the left hook’’#which I’ll take as this being at least somewhat funny#tho does it count when the only people you have to ask is who you got your humor from?#Tom Houston#digital art#digital drawing#art#fanart#Hatchetfield#Tgwdlm#nightmare time#jane’s a car#Is it obvious I have no friends in this fandom except my momma???#starkid#hatchetfield fanart#black friday#//Komic
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balor 🥰
#fields of mistria#fom#balor#fanart#art#sir...im so in love w you...#if anyone else like me loved the fuck out of stardew but was disappointed in the romance options...please play this game#the characters/interactions/dialouge is top notch#i knew nothing about this game i found out about it 2 days before release#i thought i was gonna go for march#and immedately met this guy and just#his first line is like (im a traveling merchant) and i went (oh no)#i have such a THING for merchant characters#i can finally live out my dream of romancing volo pkmn#sort of#except not evil#i think#love that the romance options in this game are like... adults with jobs/dreams/aspirations#unlike stardew where everyone is supposedly an adult but is like a teenager??#but in this game everyone is a contributing member of society#love that <3333#the dialouge for real is amazing#anyway. it still in uhh...early access? so you cant do everything youll be able to do one day#but thats good for me bc i tend to blast through these games and do 90% of things within a week#fanart???? from my ass???#only because i love this game and him#im so fucked up for him#not me tracking his ass down everyday to talk to him#also what i love about this game is being able to talk to everyone multiple times a day#like every hour or something
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Part 4 and End of Alastor's bad day Alastor survived his fake date and will probably (not) think twice in the future before trying to one-up Lucifer on unknown projects. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#radio demon#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#radiostatic#kinda ?#charlie morningstar#charlie hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel lucifer#vaggie#my art#and we will never know what else happened on that fake date#except that Vox is still alive after it which is a miracle#also yes I do have the full color HD version of the photo#still haven't decided if I'm gonna do something with that#it's just my desktop background for now#fun fact their poses in the photo was greatly inspired by the “cock shame”/“pussy facing the world” meme
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