#I have been posting him in the actual server for months I'm so sorry for not doing it sooner <//3

[weirdbroski]

I have decided after like 4 months of having him I wanted to introduce him to the cc fandom outside of discord // artfight

This is Wraith!! He's my cryptid Crush Oc. (MORE INFO BELOW VV)

He's a poltergeist (which is a type of ghost, basically instead of possessing a object like Mike or being attached to a building // life-source. They possess their own corpse. Therefore being able to keep themselves stable rather then being attached to a object to remain stable.

He died by a for-seen group of monster hunters (not in Longhope, but in a small town in Nevada) And fled to Longhope after being on the run from this group for a time-period. Overall he doesn't really dwell on it, and is a lot more tired and less egotistical and erratic as Mike. Tending to be more off yet down-to-earth, he avoids the graveyard like a plague and has.. 0 other ghost interaction.

He is pretty much referenced as the "Lake Ghost" around Longhope, and essentially parks his truck (home) at the lake. He also has a Ghost-like dog, called Darlin.

silly dog above ^^

In terms of form's he has 3, the main difference between Poltergeists and Ghosts are how their energy manifestation is different. For example, they cannot consume traits like a ghoul, and more ghost-like forms consume more energy, which is why Wraith prefers his... semi-human looking appearance.

He also has a blob form when he, over-does himself in the ghost-like form. VVV

ANYWAYSSS

HERE HE IS. HE IS SILLY. I hope the tumblr folks from and also not from the CC server enjoy the man.

[eroslove88]

"She only wanted to lie beside him"

Pairing: Yan. Kenma x Fem. Reader

Warnings: Stalking, kidnapping, bondage, noncon touching and noncon implied

Note: WOAH!!! I POST 2 TIMES IN A WEEK. WILD!!! Uhm yeah, this is a guilty pleasure fic.

Turning on your computer you feel a bit... dumb? It feels useless to even message him- but yet here you are. Kenma messaged you, and that's not out of the ordinary. Actually it's pretty normal, it's been normal for like 6-7 months.

You got close to him because he was in a server with a mutual friend. He goes to your high school and growing up the most you said to him was something about project years ago. Senior year- you thought that this would be the year where you'd come out of your shell but that never happened. Anxiety crashed that thought early on. When you got on a daily routine of texting Kenma you thought he'd actually want to befriend you, but that's not what happened. Long late night conversations and not a word said to each other in real life. It doesn't help that you two walk the same way home either...

Maybe you wouldn't have cared so much if you didn't have a small crush on him.

'hey did we hv hw' your computer gets a notification, Kenma. You sigh and type back, 'Yeah, the insert for this lesson.' you see that he's typing but he stops and doesn't respond until about 5 minutes later- despite being online. '👍' you couldn't help but roll your eyes and just sigh.

None the less he was an ok dude, he had offered to gift you things, games & chocolates- all of which you declined. You didn't want to feel materialistic and greedy.

'do you wanna play gungeon' you put your jacket on and replied quickly, 'Sorry, I'm going for a walk. I can play in an hour though!' you patiently waited and he replied quickly. 'k' huffing you closed your laptop, charging it before you left.

During the winter, the sun went down faster than usual. So around 7ish the streets were empty for walkers except for the occasional dog walkers.

The sound of quiet foot steps penetrated your mind. Snapping your head around you're faced with empty streets, probably paranoia you thought. You turned your music up walking down your usual route.

Even with the music playing you couldn't help but hear footsteps everywhere. You weren't so far from the park... just 3 more blocks.

The feeling of being watched burns your neck, you really should've turned around. Pounding footsteps come running towards you but you were too late. Your screams were demoted to tiny whimpers as you weakly try grasping the needle in your neck.

You were freezing, your arms and legs were duct taped together. It was a pretty lazy job, but whatever kind of tape it was was pretty fucking strong. Your vision was blurred with tears and you whimper into your gag and curled into yourself seeming to have missed the boy sitting at the desk across the room.

It wasn't until you heard the creaking of the chair and light footsteps that you felt panic. Your eyes remained closed even when he was right by your face.

The bed dipped down, "Don't worry, I won't hurt you" a small crying noise comes out from your gag as you try to beg him to stay away. He shushed you coming closer but all you could do was shake your head and try to move away, "Hey, it's ok" he spoke to you like a stray kitten as he slowly approached your trembling body, "Sh... It's only me" you knew that. But that didn't stop you from squirming in his arm as you tried pushing him away. He tisked at your pitiful attempt, " 'm really sorry for not approaching you" he mumbles kissing your head. "I knew you were lonely..." he chuckles, "But that honestly made things even easier" he let's you go and stands up. "I've been waiting a while to do this you know" he pulls out a black box. He opened it and paused "I've always been curious to see how your pretty face would look with a full pussy" he pulls out 3 big dildos, "and ass" he smirks pulling out a condom. "2 v. 2?"

[ask-unpleasant]

hey chat sorry for the month of inactivity. i was unmotivated to do anything with this blog

but then i looked at some of the art on here and realized that i just lost my love for the character designs. so you know how we're gonna fix that? we're redesigning some characters bayybeeee 😈

starting with the man the myth the legend, here is UNPLEZZIE 2.0

he's probably the only one i had genuine problems with other than not being very aesthetically pleasing. he seemed too boring, his proportions were always a bit wonky, and the way he became more and more simple the more i drew him dumbed him down to just...awkward.

for this redesign, i kept all the features that made him my unpleasant. the only really signature thing i changed was his hair, sorry not sorry he had to fire his barber. i changed his scars to be far less opaque as to not clutter him up (which was the main reason i left them out most of the time), the only drawback is that i'm no longer just scribbling them in with a brush, they're actual geometry, so i cut back on the arms just for my own sake. also his tail now looks (and acts) like an actual docked tail.

next is the QSWX GVCTXMG AMXLSYX VIEPPC FIMRK GVCTXMG GLEVEGXIV SJ XLI CIEV, here is CREEPY 2.0

creepy was probably my least favorite character to draw. its head shape with the hair that always ends off screen, the 4 arms, the lack of any real way to move visible, it has always been a mess of a character. don't get me wrong, creepy is my second favorite character to write for (beaten only by neuro), i love its personality and its inflection, i just never got the chance to show that because i hated drawing it so much.

so for the redesign, i've basically reimagined it. its face hair now has an actual definitive ending, it has a more unique shape, and is just much more expunged-friendly in my opinion. it looks even more like its mom now...

next is this one, i thought she was american. here's PARANORMAL 2.0

i'm gonna be totally honest i have no idea what i was doing when designing para for the first time. that outfit was 100% subconsciously stolen from some other character i can't think of right now. it also really just didn't fit her character at all. also i dont know why i gave her boobs???? what????

anyways for the redesign she's basically a whole new design now. i wanted to play with some shape language. also, para always had a sort of inhuman quality to me, despite her personality, so i've given her inverted eyes and some animalistic features. i guess it adds irony or something, i dunno.

and finally, the moment GERIATRIC CAT you've all been waiting for, UNNERVING 2.0

in truth nervy's design is my favorite. the only gripe i had is the lack of legs, like with creepy. also i had to give her one of the same pride flag ass gradient as the rest so she'd fit in with the rest. other than all that i love her she is perfect just the way she is with minor adjustments

that's all the redesigns done!! i only did these 4 because stabby is not mine to redesign and NEURO is perfect just the way it is. feel free to give me any constructive criticism for these redesigns, i can always tweak em a bit. also the more stripy gradients wont a pattern that follows the contours of the body but rather just unmoving plaid always. i hope this lengthy yap sesh contributed something to something, maybe gave some insight into my characters.

and if you got this far i put a public discord server link in the intro post. you dont gotta ask anymore. dont tell anyone....shhh....*lovingly puts my finger on your lips* *smirks* *bolts away* *gets hit by truck* *instantly fatal*

[elliefenton]

Holiday Truce 2023: The Conspiracy Surrounding One Danny Fenton

Happy Holiday Truce @scarletsaphire! I hope you like it! Sorry I'm a day late, I had a lot going on the last few days and completely forgot to post this. I used your prompt 'Danny being not quite human and freaking people out (on purpose or accidentally).' I also included a little bit of Johnny and Kitty!

@phandomholidaytruce

Summary: Danny's classmates notice some peculiarities about him.

It took everyone a while to notice.

They knew the Fentons were weird. They knew Danny Fenton was weird. But they didn’t realize just how weird he was.

They knew he wasn’t always this way. Back in middle school, he was actually normal compared to the rest of his family. But he was gone for a few days at the beginning of freshman year, and when he came back, he was different.

It started with small things. He seemed to leave the room right before a ghost showed up. That was explainable, his parents had tech that could track ghosts, Danny probably carried something like that on him, and he was so scared of ghosts that he just left the second he knew they were coming.

But then there were other things, things they couldn’t explain away so easily.

Whenever he left the room in the middle of class, it suddenly got… warmer? And that was weird. They’d heard of ghosts turning a room colder, but the lack of a specific human turning the room warmer was very odd.

Sometimes, the classroom would get warmer without Danny raising his hand, and someone would look back at his seat to find it empty. That raised some questions about how he was leaving the classroom without people noticing, because someone would see if he went out the door, right? And the school’s windows didn’t open, so he couldn’t have left through there.

People started to pay more attention to him, and that was when they noticed the really weird things.

It had been a few months since the beginning of freshman year, and it was now the middle of winter. Danny was in his usual Christmas Grinch mode, which was expected by now. His entire class was used to his attitude around Christmas time. But what was unusual was the fact that he showed up to school every day without even a jacket. Everyone else, including his two friends, came to school wearing a coat and gloves, maybe even a scarf or hat, and this kid walked in with short sleeves and jeans. He never once looked cold.

He actually seemed to be thriving in the cold, looking more refreshed than he had in the previous seasons, like maybe he was getting more sleep.

He also started to keep weird company outside of school. Someone swore they saw him and his friends at the Nasty Burger hanging out with that biker couple Phantom used to chase around. They were pretty sure that guy used to date Danny’s sister, and was presumably a ghost since Phantom used to hunt him down, so what was he doing hanging around with them, especially as afraid of ghosts as he was?

At this point, a group had formed around these conspiracy theories about Danny. They shared information, held meetings, and even had a Discord server. One might even call them a cult. When Wes Weston started yelling about his theory that Danny Fenton was Danny Phantom, the group laughed at him. Not in disbelief, but in pity. They knew better than to let anyone know of their suspicions, and if Wes didn’t shut up soon, they’d have to teach him that being discreet was the best way to keep being able to investigate.

At the end of the year, the weirdest thing of all happened. Danny Fenton started… acting normal? He stopped skipping class, started dressing normally again, and was acting much more like a fully functioning human being. Suddenly, the only weird thing about him was his hair, which had white streaks in it now.

When news of the asteroid was announced two weeks later, the group knew Danny Fenton was somehow going to be involved in whatever came next. Especially when both the Fentons and Tucker Foley became directly involved in trying to solve the issue. The reveal that Danny Fenton was Danny Phantom came as no surprise to anyone involved.

Wes Weston, of course, was bragging about how he was right, but no one paid him any mind.

[jellazticious]

sorry i don't have much better to ask, but how long have you been doing Jelllaverse stuff? it's always interesting to know how long people have had their ocs/stuff.

Jellaverse is not any official name lol, that's for organizational purposes in which I fucking forget to tag oc stuff as 😩😩😩😩😩 Also I need to update the link in the bio. Maybe temporarily hide it too

also DW ABOUT IT any ask is welcomed and appreciated! mamacita for the love of crust send me more

Answer under the cut

She-Clops has been the first among all of them, I think they've been there since 2016. It has had two rewrites and so many characters came and went but I think I'm satisfied with the Blueyesque story style it has now

Ghost Pile and When The Moon Is Bright both came around 2017 when Deltarune and Cuphead are huge hits. These are probably gonna be dormant but like, I like to include em but also here's a random pic cuz I can't find any drawings of either

The Light Plague started at 2018 and it has had many beautiful and painful rewrites. TLP is also the oc set with the densest story since it's a compilation of angsty characters that has each their own thing going on

Crank Those Gears, I believe that was 2020 or 2021 during my TF2 era because that is heavily inspired by EngieSpy. Still adore GR-17 and Nodiel dearly, hope I get to start on the webcomic

On the same world building as CTG, there's Shallow Stares with the magic tree babies. Shallow Stares came along shortly after She-Clops. One of the trees in the trio, Twelve, his design actually came to me in a dream and I just drew him. Next thing you know it became an entire dndesque adventuretimesque fantasy world, post apocalypse and all (and that apocalypse was TLP)

Not part of any self made world but TF2 ocs but Michel and his team should also be here too, somewhere mid 2021 or early 2022, that beautiful fucker is made because the DNAD server (GODBLESS DNAD YEEHAW) has a pack of people who absolutely adores tentamercs and I joined in with em. Gave him a whole team with their own original traits to go along with them. I haven't posted anything about this but the Soldier in Michel's team is a druid that wanna be human

Leave You're Not Safe Here, heavily inspired by Don't Hug Me, is the second newest out of all the sets, I think it's one year old or about to be a year old. Honestly I LOVE the concept of LYNSH cuz the main characters are all these weirdcore or abstract people but it's like a Regular Show thing so there's also humans in it. Tho the humans are rainbow coloured like Psychonauts characters (fun fact, TLP characters used to be coloured the same way, Cobalt is the only one that isn't changed) Lemme tell you smthn about LYNSH. It's the humans that act like weirdos and they insist that the abstract characters don't belong anywhere. Absolutely not a metaphor for anything

And now it leads us to Cursed To Charm. First oc set that's collaborated with someone else on the writing, shoutout to my brother from the same mushroom root @beefy-the-stronk CtC is barely three months old and yet we already came up with three seasons worth of a timeline, it's beautiful shit

[syn4k]

(this work is a continuation of this post! if you haven't read it yet, please read it first for context)

Meanwhile in the Overworld, Xisuma was trying his best to not get K.O'ed by a gaggle of guardians.

He sluggishly dodged a beam in the salty water, turning around quickly just to see another hit him square in the helmet. With a sigh, he clambered out of the water and flew towards the safety of the portal a few blocks above to get some milk. Guardian wrangling was always exhausting, even when you hadn't been going at it for hours. X considered that maybe he needed a day off to take a good long nap. Maybe that day should be today.

The portal behind him whispered, speaking of someone coming through, and he turned around to see none other than Mumbo Jumbo stumble onto the stone platform he had built, holding a shulker box.

Internally, he shelved that thought with a sigh. He'd have to take a break later.

"'Ello," he said, pleasantly surprised. "Anything else you need, or were you just dropping by?"

"Well," said Mumbo, pushing his hair out of his face, "I got really really lost on my way to your portal to ask you this. Like, really lost."

"Are you alright?" asked X with concern. Mumbo did look- well, he always looked at least a little tired, but tireder than usual.

"I ran into your brother," said Mumbo.

"That doesn't answer my question," said X with a (hopefully silent) sigh.

"Okay, so you know how I left the server a few months back to go on vacation?" asked Mumbo, putting down the shulker box and, after a moment's hesitation, sitting down on it.

"Yep."

"Well I got back and uh, well, there's a lot more diamonds in there than I remember putting in," said Mumbo, patting the side of the box. "I figured since I'd run into EX instead of you, he might have-"

"They," corrected X automatically.

"Right, sorry," said Mumbo. "I figured they might have known where the diamonds went."

"Please don't tell me they tried to extort you of your money," said X with a sigh. "I can get you some of what you lost if you need-"

"No, no, they didn't," said Mumbo quickly. "Actually, they said something about it being too easy to just say it was theirs? They're the one who pointed me over here, actually. I think h- they just wanted to be rid of me, to be honest."

Xisuma hummed thoughtfully. "That tracks too," he said. "Anyways, no, I haven't lost any diamonds either."

"Huh," said Mumbo. "Any idea who might have?"

X paused another minute, looking at the shulker box Mumbo was sitting on then back to Mumbo then back to the box. He had a suspicion, but...

"Mind if I take a look at what's in it?" he asked. Mumbo nodded and X walked over and opened it. Inside sat gleaming stacks of diamond blocks and deepslate diamond ore, the blocks hastily assembled.

Ah.

So that's what was going on.

"I have an inkling," he said, standing back up and handing the box back to Mumbo, "that Ren might know more on this subject than I."

"Alright," said Mumbo with a nod. "Thanks for the lead, X. I'll make sure- I'll make sure to ask him."

"Before you go, is there anything else that EX said to you?" asked X as Mumbo stepped back to the portal. "I know they keep to themself mostly, but I'd like to know if they're planning on pulling something."

"Uh, not really, no," said Mumbo, scratching the back of his head.

"Are you sure?"

"Well, there was something about me going to therapy for anxiety," said Mumbo with a short laugh. "I'm not sure if it was actual advice or an insult."

X wanted to sigh so badly in that moment, but he kept it in check for the sake of his guest. "Yeah, that sounds like something they'd do," he said with a nod.

"Do you- do you figure they were right?" asked Mumbo, looking him in the eyes for the first time that meeting. "I just wanted a second opinion on it."

Xisuma took a long look at the man in the suit who was known serverwide as the nervous wreck with a moustach, currently tapping fingers on his pants leg. He had seen the man be confident exactly once in season 6, and never again before or since. Despite their shortcomings, EX was a good judge of character, and... yeah, he agreed with them on this.

"If you feel like it would help you," he said finally with a shrug, trying to keep his tone as lighthearted as possible, "I know either Cleo or Joe have some sort of degree in that sort of thing."

"Huh," said Mumbo. "Never would have expected that from Cleo. Well, thanks again," he said, putting one foot into the portal and giving a wave. "I'll update you if anything happens."

"See you, my friend," called X, giving back a wave of his own. He waited silently for a few seconds after Mumbo was through the other side of the portal before turning back to his rudimentary storage system with a deep sigh and a small chuckle.

"Good Lord," he muttered to himself, pulling out his comms and typing in a message to EX.

<Xisuma> By the way, Mumbo just dropped by and I told him to go to either Cleo or Joe for therapy <Xisuma> Thanks for bringing that up, I think we've been trying to schedule him an appointment under the table but nobody knows how to do that politely lol <EvilXisuma> finally. thank hels <EvilXisuma> that man was giving me secondhand embarrassment just by existing <Xisuma> hey, be nice to the man, he has anxiety <EvilXisuma> no shit, sherlock

X sighed and put his comm back in his pocket. Maybe he'd take that off day today after all.

[yooniesim]

So i follow(ed) zhuhaitang and you both and he's been off his rocker for days tbh I'm not sure who's whispered in his ear, talking him into believing attacking your server was a good idea, i'm not on discord. because honestly the corona joke was stupid of you but it doesn't seem to be your original idea just something you mindlessly repeated and everyone on his blog is throwing it way out of proportion. AND i remember your story with the two sims you based off kpop idols and it was... nothing really just kind of childish i guess and maybe a bit weird, BUT all his receipts in general are..... so bland not in a "drama" way but in a "I can't take it that someone is enforcing a personal boundary that doesn't include me in their space" or "i hate it when we are not about me" or literally anything that wouldn't have had either of you stressing your holidays away? You don't need to post this or anything but I'm sorry for both of you having to go through this, espeically him because he seems really freaked that he couldn't actually handle being called out for his? hypocracy i guess

Thanks for this anon! Yes, that joke was stupid as hell, that's what I get for mindlessly parroting a stupid ass meme like a moron lmfao. I should've known it would've been twisted out of context, like everything else I've said. And yeah, I had kpop sims and played em like dolls, and yeah, I still cringe when I think about it- but such is life, right? None of this had to be like this and I honestly wish he had stopped ranting like three days ago when I still felt mildly sorry for the guy. I'm not surprised the 20 year old minor stalker association is blowing it out of proportion bc they have raging hard-ons for anything I do or say... it's a little disturbing but i'm somewhat used to it by now and I honestly don't care. I've had enough time to realize that they're going to say the most outrageous shit about me but like... fortunately, it doesn't matter one bit. Like what do they think, they're gonna call me names and I'm gonna keel over or some shit? Is my presence going to spontaneously explode off the internet? Am I gonna lose a couple followers? Like so what. Like I care about being blocked or unfollowed by anyone anymore. I already have half of simblr blocked or vice versa lol. They bring up the same shit every two months and call me the same things... and a few more if they can manage to out-do their previous vileness... and I just stay just the same as I am and carry on as I like. Just cos they say something about me doesn't make it true. They can say whatever they like at this point. But it was funny bc after I posted about my dad passing away I was like, how much you wanna bet that weird crowd is gonna start poking at me about something stupid again? And it was like god damn clockwork, within a day or two they were starting this silly thing up lmfao.

Anyway, thank you for the empathy nonny. Idk who told him this was a good idea either because it certainly was not. Not at all.

[chapinii]

(I lost nearly this entire post after typing it all out the first time so i'm sorry if this lacks passion LMAO)

I feel like I need to clarify that of Course q!Cellbit's state is the result of a massive trauma response, and right now, he's not 'all there' at all. He is in a massive state of stress induced disassociation in which the only thing he can truly focus on is taking his revenge on the Federation. He's only tactical in that regard because that's what's right in his mind, intellectually he's focusing all his energy on his strategies against all that Cucurucho represents because if his mind falters from his target, there's no telling who else will get hurt as he slips further and further into his own psyche. What he's failed to factor into this plan of his is that not everybody will be on his side, something which will come to affect him in the future. On one hand he thinks he's in much more control than he actually is, but in reality he's simply thinking in black and white as a result on the tunnel-vision he's developed. He's spent the last six months building himself as a family man, someone with strong morals, someone who helps people out. We've seen how he tries to mask his spiraling demeanor around the people he admires and explains what his motives are in this state, his sense of injustice is so strong that he expects the people he cares for to share his justification for his actions in killing workers of the federation, as they are ultimately the reason he and everyone he keeps close have been through so much in the first place. However, he's developing an 'us against them' mindset which, as the line blurs between Federation worker and whom he perceives to be its supporters, friends of friends will get hurt, then friends, then family. Only then do I believe he will truly become a victim of his own hubris.

As well meaning as the people on the server are, I truly think that what could open q!Cellbit's eyes through the red tinted haze he's surrounded by certainly isn't just continuing to back him into a corner and beg him to stop. He's too against himself right now, too locked in his own prison of self-hatred to be wavered by words. Events are going to happen in which I feel he'll be forced to understand the consequences of his own actions in the long term, be that by seeing their mental effects on the ones he loves, or worse. The Federation needs to be dismantled, of course, but it's not up to q!Cellbit to do it alone, and I think others need to step up with him and guide him towards a new angle before he goes to far and gets himself killed in the process.

[thebiggerbear]

Regarding I need your hand but I don't want to burn it.

I lost my dad to suicide in 2020 and this fic reminded me of him. I cried only once reading this (I started at the beginning and never stopped 😅)

This is now my favorite comfort fix. You were right. There was someone out there who needed his hugs, and I didn't want this masterpiece to go underappreciated. No pressure but do you know when p2 is coming out? Or if you have started writing it?

Oh, I'm so sorry!!! 🫂❤️ If you ever need anything, I'm here. I'm glad that this story was able to provide some comfort and some Beau hugs. ❤️

Awww thank you so much for the kind words!!! I don't have a date yet for part 2's posting but it is on my list as one of the things I'd like to get done in the next month. I do have most of part 2 written (and parts 3 & 4), but I will admit when it comes to the wake and funeral scenes, that seems to be where I'm struggling to put the finishing touches on the most. I'll admit, I think I've been avoiding it for that reason but I am going to force myself to push through it and get it done. I came up with this really nice and uplifting scene in the epilogue that was like a balm to my heart to write and I just have to keep that as my compass as I write the tough stuff, knowing that's what's waiting for me on the other end kind of.

Sorry, I don't know if that was much of an answer lol. So I'll just also include a small snippet of Part 2 that's also one of my favorite moments so far:

The server barely got out a greeting when Beau ordered beer and a burger. The young woman quickly jotted it down and then turned to you.

You gave her a small smile. “I’m okay, thanks.”

“What? No. Uh uh.” Beau shook his head and instructed your server, “She’ll have the same as me.”

When she turned back to you to see if that was okay, you kept your smile plastered in place. “I guess I’ll have the same thing.” She nodded and turned to leave until you held a hand up, stopping her. “Actually, can I also get some whiskey? Neat?”

“Sure. Coming right up,” the young blonde assured you. You gave her a nod of thanks.

Once she disappeared, you turned to find Beau studying you. He knew it was too early in the day for you to be drinking straight whiskey but thankfully, he didn’t mention it. “When was the last time you ate something?”

Surprisingly, you had to think about it. Was it yesterday afternoon? You couldn’t really remember right then. Another server had a tray of food he was carrying to a table not too far from yours, passing right by you. The smell of the food caused the most embarrassingly loud grumble to erupt from your stomach.

Beau’s brows arched. “That long, huh?”

“Sorry,” you mumbled, your cheeks heating slightly as you noticed the people seated at the table next to you staring.

He leaned forward and took your hand in his. “Nothing to apologize for.” You dropped your gaze to your joined hands. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Beau turned a pointed look on your neighbors who suddenly became very interested in their food. You watched as his thumb tenderly caressed the skin on top of your hand and you glanced up to find Beau’s soft gaze centered on you. “How are you holding up?”

This was part of the reason you hadn’t initially wanted Beau around for this, besides not wanting your two worlds to collide. Because you knew the moment you looked into his eyes and saw the deep concern staring back at you, you wouldn’t be able to lie.

You gave him a tiny shrug. “I’m not really sure,” you admitted, feeling the damn lump in your throat that just wouldn’t go away no matter how much you tried to force it to.

He nodded but remained silent, instead opting to squeeze your hand. You both stayed like that until your server deposited your drinks in front of you. You quickly thanked her and she hadn’t even gone a few feet before you drained half the glass of whiskey in one go, feeling the familiar burn travel down your throat to your stomach, lighting up the lower half of your body. And just like that, the edge you had been precariously perched on since landing back in this town disappeared, even if only for a minute or two.

You glanced over to find Beau’s eyes intent on you, his pint glass frozen in the air as if he had been attempting to clink glasses with you in a silent toast. You were apologetic, immediately regretting your rude behavior. “Sorry,” you mumbled. “I just…needed that.”

The corners of his lips tipped up in an understanding smile and he took a sip of his IPA. He gave a single nod of approval, licking his lips, before he set the glass down and picked up your hand, placing a gentle kiss to the side of it. The soft touch mixed with the whiskey burning your lower extremities shot a sudden bolt of lightning through your veins. You did your best to ignore it, though, and you definitely worked to keep the reaction off of your face. 

Beau’s sharp gaze was intent on you but all you could see staring back at you was compassion and concern. “Let’s get you fed and back to the hotel,” he murmured against your skin, his fingers lightly caressing your wrist.

[koppiki]

I've started trying my hand at cleaning a bit (not because I've given up on finding someone else to do it- I just thought it would be a Fun New Experience, and a nice breath of fresh air from what has been feeling to me as a period of Translatory Stagnation), and it's honestly pretty enjoyable! It definitely helps that Shinozaki raws are quite high quality (thanks in part to Takeshino upscaling them, and also thanks to JamzDoge ripping them well... speaking of, I'm gonna need to figure out how he did that, on account of him being... essentially no contact with me at this point, probably because the idea of further scanlation-related obligations stresses him out, if I had to guess), and so the whole process isn't too crazy with regard to tones and leveling and all that (since they get super duper muddled with lower quality raws).

Anyways, look at how cool I am (following images are from the first page or so of chapter 32):

Truly, I am amazing... well, more accurately, the people that Taught Me How to Do It are amazing. Thank you kindly to my friends (Kai especially) at Second Life Scans (another group I am a part of) for that. I very much appreciate their willingness to teach me, even if they do poke fun at me along the way at times. Such is the process.

Chapter 31 should be out pretty soon, assuming nobody's house explodes. Which could happen. Probably won't, but it could. After that, assuming cleaning goes as planned (that is, if I can pull more people in so it's not just Me and whatever Assemblage of temporary volunteers I can yoink from the various scanlation-related servers I am a part of), chapter 32 should be out in a far more reasonable timeframe than that which has been seen these past few months. Sorry about that, by the way.

After that is a whole different story (on account of it not being translated yet- honestly, I haven't translated anything in over a month, I think), but... I should be able to get back into it. Almost certainly, actually.

Anyhow, I have an exam tomorrow. This post is me procrastinating on either a) studying more for it or b) sleeping. Considering that at this point it is in... 6 hours? 6.5? I... really ought to get to bed. Like, now. Right now. Eesh.

I wonder if I should try to recruit more translators. Not for Shinozaki, of course, that's my child. Mostly for Q. I like Q, but... I dunno if I can handle three projects at once. Three translation projects, that is. I PR other stuff, but PR is a lot easier for me (less second-guessing of the self, more being critical of other's interpretation- the latter's a whole lot easier to deal with than the former).

Uh... goodnight, I guess. Wondering if I have anything else to say...

Oh, I'm pretty sure the final volume of Shinozaki (that is to say, the physical release, with the cover and everything) comes out in December. I will of course be picking that up the instant it becomes available. You can rest assured of that.

I'm excited to see what the cover will be. Usually that's all shown ahead of time (was the case for vol 9, at least) but I don't think that it is happening here. I could also just be extremely forgetful, but I'm pretty sure I would remember seeing it if it was there. And I'm pretty sure it wasn't.

Trying to think of a good way to end this whole speech I've written here is impossible, so I won't. Well, I will. It'll just be a goodnight. Again.

Goodnight!

[jade-of-mourning]

hiii so uh I just found ur account but I see you post a decent amount of mako stuff,,,

are you planning on putting any of that on ao3 (finished fics or blurb ideas turned into fics) or is it solely tumblr? and would you possibly mind some short stuff based on some of your posts? idk he’s js my newest hyperfixation and your acc is so coolll :3

-🐌

HI ANON!!!! mako has been in my brain so much for the past few months; i just restrain myself from posting seven times a day and instead, i aggressively brainrot in my discord server with a single person in it. (it's me — i'm the single person)

i've been juggling a couple fics for ao3 on him lately (account, mostly atla writing), though tragically i've been at a bit of a writing block. it's probably from overthinking story structures, but trust that i'll get at least a couple of them out eventually haha. the main one is a post-canon fic called rose beds and gasoline veins at 11.9k as of now, followed by a silly 10-chapter 14-year-old-avatar!mako au called snowglobes don't shake on their own which i've spent some time casually outlining (featuring jinora and asami!). there's a post i spontaneously conjured up that would roughly act as half of the first chapter. i'll post the summary if you're curious lol

i've also got a couple random/short oneshots that i spontaneously wrote and completed, before promptly forgetting that i can post them, so… maybe i'll do that soon. one of them is a slightly different take on mako & bolin's family in ba sing se, on some of their cultural differences and traumas through hot pot (which i might expand into a longer oneshot on ao3 after i finish rose beds). the other one was initially a joke about him (who i like to hc as aro lol) accidentally being a really big fan of sex. it's very vague but it turned out kind of angsty in exploring how mako deliberately gives up control in an attempt to frame himself as his mother rather than the man who killed her (coping fr); it's not really up my usual alley, but i might post it somewhere sometime idk. i didn't ever really flesh it out in my head but i have some inklings for a mako & kai oneshot on forgiving yourself as a kid, a mako & lin beifong oneshot on his recruitment featuring better characterization than that spontaneous shitpost i made, and a half-written expansion of jobs in an actually comprehensible story-ish format focused more on pre-canon backstory of him and bolin. also, last night i kind of accidentally started an essay arguing the case of reading mako as "this is a male female character somehow", but that's a whole other brainrot. my friends think i'm insane for wanting to write an essay for fun :P

thank you so much for stopping by!!! i love to hear that people love this random fictional character too — it makes me really happy especially considering how many people do not love him haha. literally anyone please send me asks about writing or headcanons or brain thoughts and enable me to talk about mako because i can actually talk about mako so much.

and for the record, sorry for responding with so many words oops. i have a lot of thoughts.

^^ summary for the avatar!mako au that i might never finish but i think it's a really funny mix of crack and seriousness that i would love to write. maybe after i finish my marimba solo!

[auspex]

1 on 1 mark session recap! As always, sorry not a lot of context is given.

Mark first finished reading a book 'on thorns and their consequences' which was basically explaining how the sabbat came to be and their PoV on things and then with an anarch commentary towards the end expressing their disagreements. but on the first last page was red runic lettering which mark could not recognize and which sucked up his vitae when he placed it on it.

He tried to do some internet research and came across an obscure forum which claims to be for learning about obscure languages but actually seems to have a lot of vampires on it posting real and fake runes, kinda like testing each other

The runes mark was looking at were on there but the mod, who basically posts in every server, says 'you wont find anything about that in this life.' the posteris like 'cmon doesn't someone have any family who could help' and the mod replies 'ask J' so that smenacing.

idk if J is Julius? it probably isnt but anyway. mark has already reported reading this book to julius and so is gonna ask him about it cause he couldn't figure it out.

the rest of the night he spends teaching G -G is doing well and did remember his vowels : ) also explained to Gs sister how he made sure the investigation would stop and ask if she needed any other help. she asked if he could get them free or at least out of their current essentially prison sooner and mark said no but they would be out in a month to a month and a half. she didn't know how long that was. so he explained how torpor and weeks and  months and years worked

she still didnt say thanks or bye to mark but there was maybe something where she was close to doing so

i love G im so glad he is doing well he learned a lot he is almost through the alphabet

ok now for the meat of the session. the next night he goes to the chantry to talk to cassidy about the books. Knocks on the door. no answer. 

He is getting a bad feeling. represented irl by the ST playing absolutely terrifying music as i search for him.

In the chantry apartments there is an often ignored ghoul at the front and so then he asked her where Lilian’s apartment was (Cassidy’s best friend.). She told him. He knocked on her door. No answer. 

Checks the cafeteria. nope. library. nope. physics department (where their circle head, Dr. White, is). Nope. He asks someone there if she had seen either of them. nope.

so i'm worried as hell

im trying to think what mark could do and im like. i cant scry on him cause i dont have anything of Cassidy’s. 

and the st gives me a Look as if 2 say u do ur forgetting

But he kinda gives it to me for free hes like, ur wearing the same coat you did when you went to the movies

Turns out mark has cassidy's ticket. so thats close enough to being his so. mark does scry on him

its not super juicy but it is super concerning. Cassidy is by lilian in what is probably the side door in his haven that mark hasn’t been in. barricading the door. with a fuckton of furniture. and also pushing against it. lilian looks terrified. cassidy looks So Done With This Shit (tm). something is banging on the door.

so with that mark goes back to the ghoul and is like. So. Uhm. Yeah i actually have permission to enter cassidys haven yes. please let me in

she looks scared - mark put her in a real bad spot. If he doesn’t actually have permission and she lets him in he could get in trouble. but he reassures her that itis fine and his decision and nothing bad will happen. 

so she says ok and goes to open the door (she is able to if she is doing so of her own consent, she functions as a key ig). As she goes to open it, Mark says uhm. they are doing experiments so when you open the door. back up. and she's like "okay?' and opens the door and immediately vine tentacle thingies burst out and she falls back on her ass and scrambles back, screaming

she gets away and mark engages in combat. its the same sort of monster, just smaller, as the one on his territory in the conservatory, that navigate by sound. it has a lion's mane around a beak in the center and vine like tentacles around it.

mark takes a LOT of damage in its first attack he had like 1 unharmed box left  but he manages to win :) 

cassidy and lilian pop out from the door and are like. mark is that you?

Cassidy’s haven is wreckt sadly. Mark's like. yeah its me. its dead. you can come out.

lilian is SO sad it's dead but she isnt mad at mark. its clear she wanted to subdue it but they had no way to do so and mark comments as such

she's like "i was sooo close " :(

cassidy looks So Done and is like. thank you for your assistance mark but how did you . get in.

mark is like. thats not really important right now, is it? cassidy says 'somewhat, but we can discuss that later'

mark says that unfortunately this made quite a lot of noise and the ghoul went screaming for help so time to get your stories straight.

theres a few other things said but then zach rolls up

If you dont know who zach is he is a newly turned tremere. dr. white's child. elevated into power due to his sire. he's a classic skater  boy. hes head of security. he figured ALL of marks shit out when he broke into a lab - he is GOOD at his job despite his casual attitude. he says 'chill' all the time.

he skates up (yes skateboard in the hall) and asks whats up. mark says 'hi zach. it's chill, i handled it.' (Mark kinda likes Zach). 

And hes like. 'whats chill? can you explain?' and marks like. looks at cassidy and lilian. 'they would know better i just came at the end' and cassidy’s like. looks at lilian as if to say to her. u did this shit u explain!

so lilian starts a story which is kind of obviously partially a lie.

she says that she was doing her research, developing off of Leanah's (which was the stuff mark uhm. stole and sabotaged for her). and she noticed this evening that some things were off. papers where she wouldn't normally leave them. but the chimera project was So Important (TM) for the chantry that she just HAD to press on. Oh Also I found this Lipstick (produces lipstick) that looks JUST like what Leeanah wears isnt that interesting! (zach has her put it in an evidence back for him). She says 'Cassidy even made a joke that maybe I should wear makeup more often." Cassidy grunts but keeps a poker face. he would obviously Never Fucking Say That and lilian is messing with him.

god i love them sm. mark also knows cassidy would never fucking make that joke

(explaining a story that may dictate ur fate as u are investigated. does not miss an opportunity to fuck w the bestie* girl!

she continues to say that she got the embryo (described as tadpole) out of the cauldron she starts growing it. and it kept well. growing.

she pauses there. zach is like. okay and? it grows and?

Cassidy steps in. 'when it got bigger than our couch we realized we had a problem.' (also hehe ‘our’ couch their friendship is everything 2 me…) 

lilians like yes. then thankfully cassidy, with some assistance from mark, killed it. and here we are :) and then zach turns to mark and is like. what do you mean how did you get here how did you know.

and marks like Oh Well You Know "I was coming here for unrelated reasons, cassidy and myself are working together you see. And I had permission to enter. And obviously I would assist him in combat. *Coughs.*

he coughs cause i rolled 1 success on the lie T_T

zach is like. you have permission?? and cassidys like uh yes. 'as needed he can enter. its easier that way' so yay that ghoul won't get in trouble LOLLL mark got retroactive permission

even if each can tell he lied like. how do u call him on that when the person who was to have given him that permission said he did.

Liliana finishes up by describing how awful it was to be sabotage. At the end of her story. she says "Im sure leeanah would be very sorry if she saw the destruction she caused and would say so' and cassidy said 'i would not accept her apology' annnddd thiswent over my head but the st explained that was lilian apologizing to cassidy and cassidy telling her to fuck offlkdsafjlkdsjf

and zachs like. aight seems chill! (Perhaps all was not chill). lemme go in your haven here to see evidence of that sabotage

and  cassidys like oh, please do let me clean up first :) and zachs like :) noo you should see my room haha its fine :) and then cassidsy like. okay fine. you do not have permission to enter my haven. which is something respected in the chantry

zachs like do u really wanna go down that route.

Cassidy appears to hesitate. Mark is FREAKINGGG out he CANNOOTTTT find those books mark had him gather. thankfully cassidy says. Yes. Yes I do.

And so zach says fine thats chill. ill see you soon- and he has one of his guys (he had a small posse with him) stay. cassidys like. well that was a mess. mark says yes. which is why you  should start cleaning it. do you want help.

The person Zach left behind enters cassidys room and was making sure the pc was ok. mark is like cassidy is that ok?? and cassidy says 'oh, hes chill.' It seems this was the little fucker that set up the pc and internet for cassidy in the first place! cassidy makes friends with fledglings :) he doesn't speak but cassidy calls him Hack. because that's what he does, ig

Anyway. Mark helps lilian gather monster body parts to the center of the room where she starts some sort of chanting incantation to get rid of it. cassidy goes into his Side Room to start cleaning. When mark is done gathering body parts he knocks and peeks into the side hallway. cassidy tells him to enter and mark starts helping him put books away

well first theres this hallway which has 2 doors. mark enters door two with cassidy.

its a beautiful study room with mostly books, but also some old clothes, including a duster (COWBOY CASSIDY REAL...) and a painting with someone in a cuirass but the face is oddly blurry

also, all the books do not have legible titles.

with sense the unseen it seems the chandelier in the room has some sort of enchantment blurring those things out

there is also a TALL ASS stack of those notebooks he writes in. Mark glances at it and looks at cassidy who pauses and says. i need to call in a favor. can you just keep packing books away for 10 mins ? and marks like Sure

and hes left alone in cassidys study. but he decides to NOT snoop and figures he wouldnt be able to read shit anwyay due to that enchantment so he does literally just put books away.

Cassidy returns and unfolds a piece of paper that he remembers Wendy using before - its like. a bag of holding.

he unfolds it and puts it under the stack of notebooks carefully . the note books fall in. then he carefully, very very very carefully, folds it up. mark comments 'got a few years in there, huh?" he replies "A good deal more than that.".

but yeah theres also furniture and stuff everywhere btw, its a mess. The pack up books. During this time mark asked like. ok we cant keep these books about resisting blood bonds in her haven. and Cassidy is like. really mark. you're gonna make me haul them from the library every time ur gonna read them, and mark is like. sorry. yeah : )

They finish and return to the mainroom. lilian is on the floor, hands splayed, miserable. done with everything. cassidy makes a point to step over her.

cassidy and mark hauled books up to lillian's haven which was much smaller. and complained about stairs. together <3 lol

When they return hack is no where to be found. cassidy looks around and comments that the should not be in the back rooms. he does open the door to the second room but he asks mark to step back so he cant see in : (anyway mark ends up finding zach with sense the unseen (he went Invisible ig) and he was rifling upstairs through lillian's things

cassidy is like 'hack ive been through enough tonight please just give it back' and hack goes to the computer and types:

";)

I have to give them something, y''no"

and cassidy is like. sigh. will this make our unlives harder in the future. and he writes

"maybe a little"

and marks says “you know what that's fair” <- has done the same shit of finding something Smaller so it proves he was Trying but actually not

cassidy comments that he is sad about his clothes getting thrown around and wrecked - 'over the decades he had collected quite a collection, some of which are hard if not impossible to replace' and mark comments 'i hope the tv is ok too'

and upon saying that cassidy actually reacts as opposed to being stone faced "Oh no you're right, the tv!" and he goes right for it

drops to his knees to prop it back up. and theres a crack through a fourth of it. he looks so sad. mark turns it on and it does still display but there is that crack

mark is like its ok we can get another and cassidy is like ' but this was my first tv :('. hes sentimental about it my fucking HEART

marks like. im sorry. i can help you pick out a new one maybe. cassidy says he'll likely take mark up on that. and mark also says maybe it could be fixed and cassidy says he will also try that

but yeah its cute that he got attached to the tv T_T (edited)

anyway zach skates right back in after the bit with hack that i described above. and says. ok in the name of the authority invested in me by blah blah blah... everyone but you, get out please! (hack being that one)

sooo the three leave. And mark is like.well. good luck with everything.

Cassidy and lilian do not look very happy but give ike a half hearted thanks

mark is lowkey like. ok u could be a bit more thankful i saved ur ass and helped u clean up but OKAy . . . .

cassidy also mentions that they can still work on their shared research in a few nights

oh also mark finally got the opportunity to ask if they had showers and they do not and mark is like. wow that sucks.

Cassidy diddnt seem to care but like. dude. imagine only having washrooms. L.

thats the session!

[misssugarpinkshome]

Author Update!

Hey y'all! Here's the author update. Just posted Chapter 58, I'm so excited since the next chapter will be incredibly challenging for me to write. I hope you guys are excited as I am.

I'm... actually gonna put the update this time under a cut, cause it's A Wee Bit More Serious than normal, lmao.

The TL;DR: this boy can fit a whole lot of trauma in him, and he's kinda tired of it. It's been an incredibly hard month, but I'm also looking at the amount of growth I've done and I'm proud.

Thanks for reading, folks!!

(Big ol' trauma dump below the cut!)

OOOOKAY so like. Yikes!

I got called out by someone I look up to basically telling me I needed to shape up, and while they weren't WRONG, it really fucking hurt. As in, I got so incredibly triggered that I cried for about 48 hours straight.

This also led to me and a friend of mine having a really big falling out, and while it got resolved, oof it was exhausting.

At the end of those 48 hours, I had to deal with a situation in a server I moderate for where someone made some incredibly serious allegations about another server member.

The allegations turned out to be false, so we did not ban the server member who was accused -- which led to a callout post being written about me and the server, with false allegations about me that were incredibly triggering.

:) This was all right before a very nauseating 14 hour car ride :) Definitely did not fuck up my brain :) Definitely did not cause me to maybe split again :) Oops

My vacation to see my partner's extended family went really well at least? They're really awesome and good family. But I spent all of my free time working on a (currently around 50 page) document detailing all of the bullshit that happened with the allegations. Yes. It was that many pages. That's about a fourth of the bullshit.

Remember how I was on vacation? Well. I lied to my parents about my location. And they found out. And one thing led to another, I called them, they screamed at me, and... I broke my phone. I've made the decision to cut them off, because I just... can't handle this anymore.

Anyways. Cut to the present. I still haven't told them, but they figured as much since they can't reach me through my old number. My mom keeps emailing my workplace trying to contact me. I haven't been able to read them yet. My therapist is helping me compose a letter to my parents and my sister to let them know. My partner and my friends and family-by-association has been really supportive and caring, and it's a lot. Not to mention, school has started again, so now I'm back to being overworked and underpaid (and... actively dealing with some severe harassment from a homophobic student each day at the moment... ugh)

It's been an incredibly fucking hard month. The way I have to look at it, though, is that I am incredibly strong and I have grown so damn much. I have a lot going on, and normally, this would be enough to make me completely self destruct.

But (with the help of friends and my chosen family alike), I managed to help clean the living room. Today I did some dishes. I am ROCKING teaching. And... I'm desperately, hopelessly in love with my fiance, and feel safer than I ever have before.

I've always hated the phrase "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" because of what I've been through. But right now, I'm feeling very strongly a variation of the phrase: "what you survive influences who you are; processing that makes you stronger." I feel like I've grown a lot in the past year alone, and it's only going to get better.

So... yeah! There's a huge big long trauma dump. I'm so so sorry lol I just... I want you guys to know about the person behind the T_T profile picture. It feels good to be seen. <3

[fandoms-of-a-random-existence]

Do you have any OCs? feel free to talk about them if you do

What was the first piece of media you engaged with on the internet? Are you still interested in it?

What's something you made or did that you're proud of?

What's something that made you smile this month?

Hiiii!! It's been a while, how's it going?

Anyways! My OCs! ...admittedly I have not been thinking about them for a while now as my brain has been very preoccupied spinning the characters from the Kings in the Corner server around and only Raevyn is actually my character but. Wah. <-is currently drawing thematic art for that one. I'm so normal really-

I'm not going to get too into as it's almost midnight while I'm typing this and I do need to be packing hudjkhdskhfcs but! A silly whimsical little guy who is 6'4 and wears platforms and has horns and a tail and slit pupils and black sclera and wings technically and pointy ears and sharp teeth and wears really fancy clothes all the time and has glowing star-freckles from the time their little gayboy (who is the worst guy ever /aff) gave them literal stardust to drink and who is also deeply traumatized from the decade spent as a lab experiment. I would like to once again reiterate for any kitc-goers reading this post: I'm sorry I really don't mean to be evil it's entirely accidental- but besides that! That one is so gender to me <3 Bearer of the Baked Goods my beloved <3 They spend so much time sleeping in trees,,, (gay person dreams. their little gayboy is a dreamwalker) and singing and they've fallen into a lake twice offscreen and walked around tracking water. It was part of the original group who who went up to the King of Diamonds and called him bitchless to his face <3 I love thinking about their biology (I am admittedly the embodiment of all the mad scientist that made their childhood terrible-) and they do magic sometimes and made potions that turn people into cats and-

Well! That's enough rambling for now!

The first media I engaged with on the internet,,,, a very good question given that it's been a decade since then... I think it was Percy Jackson? Either that or OHSHC. Both of which still have a fond place in my heart but I don't really actively seek out content anymore alas

I'm actually really proud of some of the art I've managed to do on my phone! Insane to me that people actually can use their fingers to draw that well (Yes. Luxray, if you're reading this, I'm talking about you /pos) and I tried it out and it didn't go terrible!!! actually here have this thing I did for the Greek Myth AU Raevyn (kitc my beloved. the au server has so many aus and no sign of stopping and it's glorious. we are all deranged /pos) and. I keep looking at it. what do you mean I did this on my phone with my own hands. Girl (gn) what-

Something that's made me smile this month,,,, honestly a lot of things! A very large amount of them from the kitc server <3!! but also! A friend of mine drove us to I-Hop and pancakes tasty <3

anyways can you tell I have brainrot? because I have brainrot. Have a nice day!!

[lizardsfromspace]

UP ALL NIGHT 10/30/2022

The spooky season is behind us, and now it's time to remember something truly scary: your teen years on the 2000s internet.

There's this one forum I've been on since 2004. It's still up, and still being posted on, though things have slowed down a bit. Since 2017, I've been in an associated Discord server. And since 2019 I've run an associated Discord server.

Now I've seen many things there over the years, and I think it's time for a retrospective of trolls. Not true trolls, the drive-by kind, but those who stayed long enough for their flouncing to be worth it. Here are the choice highlights

In the forum's earliest days, when we were all bookish nerds in middle school or high school, our first troll was a girl who, like, cussed. And talked about drugs. And *leans in close* sex

Our most enduring Dramatic User was someone who would denounce everyone and say she was leaving at the drop of a hat. So during one of her stints on forum she had the brilliant idea of inviting her boyfriend to join. Well, this ended how you'd expect, with him making several whiny breakup threads describing it in lurid, and pathetic, detail. At one point, he started posting in Al Bhed???

As for her, she was in and out until 2016, where she went full MAGA and left due to the "intolerance" she experienced as the only pro-Trump member of the forum

A regular user who started openly discussing being a zoophile and we all just? Let him stay? And keep talking about it?

A dramatic teen girl with a sparklewolf avatar and her emo boyfriend who were actually fictional and made up to cyberbully another member

A guy who relentlessly hyped up Ron Paul and Amway and his "brother"; we never quite figured out if he was real or the same guy under another account. At one point this guy asked how we would construct our "perfect world". He spelled it "perfect wold" and his world was Ron Paul's ideal world but with a bunch of Dahir Insaat esque technologies implemented

The only Discord troll of note was someone who spent months quietly lurking in a very pro-LGBT server, then one day started lecturing us on the evils of homosexuality. He then insisted he didn't hate anyone except his commander in the IDF and vanished

A secret gang of people who hacked the forum's secret mods-only forum and all the mod's email accounts and leaked everything they were saying about people in a flurry of anonymous PMs. If you missed the forum era I'm sorry you missed incredible moments like that, right proper secret wars for control of a message board with a few hundred members

Me! I was banned three different times, for an April Fool's Day prank gone wrong, for exploiting a exploit to send every member a PM saying "Bazinga", and for a third thing I forget

Anyway, here's a 2000s classic. Modest Mouse with "Float On".

[nukenai]

sorry i just, do you have any idea how demoralizing it is, that i've been writing for decades and it's the only thing i can offer in terms of Creative Anything, Ever, and I had to reblog my shit 140 times to get one potential "i liked this!!" comment, and I felt so brave putting my stuff on AO3, and I was so burned out and didn't write for a couple years but started up again, and did all the same stuff I did before and i can't get as much as like, a comment or more than a single kudos, or any real feedback whatsoever,

and like, I don't want to sound so bitter. but i encouraged my sister to start writing her star wars self-insert stuff. and all she did was put it on AO3 and she got a bajillion people instantly fawning all over her story, loving her OC, drawing her fanart, begging her for updates, and it's like

what am i doing wrong??? was my writing really so fucking shitty and worthless that I couldn't get the attention of more than 2 people who would read my stuff out of pity I'm sure

like what's WRONG with me. i'd love feedback, or something, somewhere to talk to people about writing this stuff. a friend invited me to a server that's a couple friends of hers to do this exact thing, except nobody's posted anything for months

i cleared out ALL my writing from tumblr and wiped my AO3 and i had ONE person go "oh, i liked your stuff", except I never got any actual comments on my actual stuff in years!!! how can i believe anyone cared if no one ever said anything to me!!!!

i feel so fucking broken and beaten down and upset, writing is LITERALLY ALL I FUCKING HAVE. i cannot draw pretty pictures of my stories i'm fucking sorry! all i can do is write and my stuff either wasn't good enough to warrant being commented on, or people couldn't bother to read it.

i support "writing for just yourself" so much. that's what i've been doing for so long!!! but i was actively asking for feedback and for people to just PLEASE SAY ANYTHING, and even friends who have in theory been supportive of my writing can't do that!!!!! this makes me feel so petty and fucking awful but IT'S ALL I FUCKING HAVE. I CAN'T DO ANYTHING ELSE.

i've been in this HORRIFIC depression over this for WEEKS and i haven't had like a single word of sympathy or caring and it's just violently reinforcing that yeah, i was wasting mine and everyone's time and no one wants to read the things i'm writing.

when I was writing fallout stuff people really liked it! i would get regular comments and stuff! but the pokemon stuff is what i'm most passionate about and i just. i just wanted someone to read.

even an irl friend asked me, actively fucking asked me! for the link to my AO3 and I gave it to him and have not heard a single word. like why even ask. i am so fucking heartbroken.

i don't want to take this out on people. it's not people i'm mad at it's myself. i'm just convinced now that nothing i create is worthwhile and I was right to delete all of my writing (cleared a lot from my computer too) because the idea of someone missing it is a joke.

i have never felt this hopeless about the SINGLE THING I CAN DO in my entire life. i don't want to give it up entirely i have this pathetic little string of hope i'm holding onto and i don't want to let go. but just why fucking bother. because i will have NOTHING left if I don't have this. but why bother.

i feel like i've become nothing but a burden or, at most, an accessory to everyone in my life lately. i'm like everyone's third or fourth place consideration and i cannot tell you how worthless that makes me feel. i have to arm wrestle conversations out of people and i just don't have that kind of energy anymore.

i feel like such a goddamn disappointment of a human being.