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hungermakesmonsters · 5 months ago

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(Once Bitten) Twice Shy

Chapter Sixteen

Plot summary : Desperate to get away from your controlling family, you take a job in New York as a wealthy vampire's blood source. A million dollars awaits if you can make it through a year, but life with Billy Russo is not going to be as simple as you think.

Pairing : Billy Russo x Reader

Story Rating : R Chapter Rating : PG

Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] Smut and angst. All chapters will contain mentions of blood. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story.

Word Count : 4k

A/N : 😅😅😅

MASTER LIST

Chapter Sixteen

You tried to wipe away your tears but your hand was trembling too much, and the moment you heard the elevator moving it only got worse. In the three minutes that followed your brief conversation with Lissa, you’d changed your mind at least a hundred times and you were already practising all the ways that you might tell her that you didn’t want to leave after all.

You didn’t want to go, you didn’t want to leave Billy, but you knew you had to.

That thought was what would carry you through this difficult moment. You didn’t want to hurt him, didn’t want to turn his life more upside down than you had already. This was best for both of you.

By the time the doors slid open and Lissa stepped into the penthouse, you’d managed to force yourself into a calm and detached state, not wanting to make it any harder than it needed to be. Your suitcase was at her side and on top of it was the outfit you’d been wearing when you arrived, neatly folded for you.

Lissa was silent for a moment, taking a measure of you but, somehow, you kept your nerve.

“You’re aware that once you do this you will not be able to change your mind?” She asked, finally, as if she’d decided that you were serious about it.

“I am.”

“And you’re aware that you will receive no compensation for your time?”

“I know,” you answered, forcing the words past the lump in your throat.

“Are you sure you have everything that you wish to take with you? Once you leave, there is no coming back.”

It was then that you realised that there was something you wanted, something that you just couldn’t leave behind.

You quickly excused yourself, half-jogging back to your bedroom, taking your clothes with you. After quickly changing, you found yourself looking at your bed, your heart broke knowing that you couldn’t take the large bear with you, but you grabbed the stuffed beagle, Bill, and clutched it to your chest, trying to ignore the tears that were starting to well in the corners of your eyes.

You took a minute before stepping back out into the penthouse and facing Lissa again. She gave you a curious look when she noticed the stuffed toy but didn’t say anything.

“There’s something I need you to do for me before I go,” you said, barely managing to hold her cold gaze, “I need Karen Page’s phone number.”

“Of course,” Lissa answered, giving a wave of her hand towards the elevator.

For a second you froze, not wanting to move, not wanting to leave. All you could think about was Billy and how heartbroken he’d be when he realised you were gone. Even if it was for the best in the long run, there was no way of doing this without causing him pain and you hated yourself for that. But it was better to hurt him now than spend decades at his side only to slip away due to age or illness.

“I take it you didn’t discuss this with Mr Russo,” Lissa offered, watching you as you finally took a step and started towards the elevator.

“No, I didn’t.” Those three little words conveyed far more shame than you would have liked.

“It’s not my place to ask why but -” for the first time since you’d met her, Lissa seemed to be thinking twice about speaking her mind, “- I was starting to think you might actually make it through the whole year.”

You knew what she was trying to ask; she wanted to know what happened, she wanted to know what he’d done to finally push you over the edge. You’d made it past the six months mark though, by this point, you’d broken pretty much all of the rules.

“I thought the job would be easier than it is,” was all you dared to offer as the elevator doors slid shut, trying to distract yourself by shoving Bill the Beagle into the top of your suitcase, leaving his head poking out.

“As far as I’m aware, Mr Russo has been happy with your service, perhaps if you were speak to him -”

“No, please, I - I just want to leave.” you abruptly interrupted, before struck with an uncomfortable thought. “Have you spoken to him?”

“No. Staying has always been your choice and it is not Mr Russo’s place to try and influence that decision. I will however have to inform him of your resignation the moment you leave the building.”

If you didn’t know any better, you might have assumed that she was trying to talk you out of leaving, as if she could see through all the bullshit and knew exactly what was going on. Dread coiled in your stomach at the thought of him hearing the news from Lissa. You’d at least hoped you’d be able to ask Karen to be the one to drop the bombshell.

“Are you sure you wouldn’t at least like to wait until morning?” She asked a moment later. “If you need somewhere to stay or tickets arranged, I could -”

“No. It’s fine, Karen offered me a place to stay if I needed it.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the truth either; she had offered you a place, but you had no intention of staying there.

The elevator door opened and you stepped out in the atrium. Lissa handed you your phone which, surprisingly, still had charge. (Perhaps she’d kept it charged so it would be ready in case you ever needed to leave.) Then she gave you Karen’s number and wished you good luck.

You felt sick as you slowly started towards the doors, suddenly terrified of the outside world and a life without Billy. You didn’t dare look back until you were outside and your stomach nearly turned itself inside out when you saw Lissa lifting her phone to her ear. All you could think about was Billy, how angry and devastated he would be to hear that you were gone.

Your own phone was buzzing non-stop, alert after alert from six months of messages, voicemails, missed calls and social media notifications. It was almost enough to make you switch the damned thing off again.

Taking a breath, you called Karen, briefly explaining the situation, and asking her to meet you at the bar she’d taken you to before hailing a taxi. On the ride there, your phone started to light up with an unknown number, over and over again. Your heart threatened to stop when you realised that it must be Billy. The number appeared over and over, then the text messages started, pleading with you to answer, asking you not to leave.

Karen was waiting for you outside Josie’s when you got out of the taxi, her arms folded across her chest, and the look on her face was anything but happy.

“What the fuck is going on?” She asked, looking at you and then at the suitcase at your side.

“I’m leaving, I just wanted -”

“I know that part,” she almost snapped, “Frank told me. He says Billy’s worried sick.”

Again, you found your stomach knotting, suddenly feeling sick. Maybe it had been a mistake to want to see Karen, maybe you should have just left town.

“Does he know we’re here?” You dared to ask, hoping that he wasn’t going to show up and stop you from leaving.

“No. I told them I’d talk to you but that if you really wanted to leave, I’d let you go,” she said, not exactly sounding happy about it.

The relief you felt was palpable and Karen seemed to notice. For a moment more she just stared at you before finally relenting and ushering you into the bar for a drink.

You sat at a table by the window, aware from the noisier patrons, your eyes moving to the door every time that it opened. Karen sat opposite you, cradling a drink and waiting for you to start talking and, eventually, you did. You told her everything - everything that Billy had told you and everything that had happened between you - and she quietly listened, barely holding back the growing confusion on her face until you were finally done.

“So you fixed things with him, slept with him, told him you love him, and then you snuck away the moment he left for work?” She didn’t sound impressed, and when she put things that way, you couldn’t blame her.

“I don’t want to hurt him,” you tried to explain.

“I think it’s a little late for that.”

“You don’t understand...” you tried again, “you didn’t hear him when he told me how scared he was of losing me, how I was going to grow old and die, and how he’d be left on his own.”

“You’re leaving him on his own now,” she said, stating the obvious and making you feel worse. “And what about your family? What’s the actual plan here?”

“I... I don’t know,” you shrugged. “I’ve got enough to get a bus ticket out of the city and then... I guess I’ll just see where I end up.”

“You know there’s only one place you can end up if you do this. If the Maggia are looking for you -”

“I know,” your voice broke, “but what choice do I have? This thing with Billy, I can’t let it get any deeper. I can’t do that to him.”

“What about -”

Her phone started to ring and your heart stuttered when you saw his name on the screen. You looked at her with pleading eyes, but it didn’t stop her from answering the call. Your gaze dropped to the table as she started to speak.

“Yes, she’s here with me, she’s -” you could almost hear him frantically speaking over her, “- she’s safe. Yes, I’m -” she stopped and looked at you. “He wants to talk to you.”

Despite the way you shook your head, Karen still held out the phone to you. You refused for a few seconds before finally taking it from her.

“Billy...”

“Please don’t do this,” he pleaded.

“I can’t stay, I -”

“Whatever I did wrong, I’m sorry.” He said, and the hurt in his voice caused your eyes to well with tears. “I - I love you. I should’ve said it back, I should’ve just told you that -”

“No, Billy, it’s not that,” you interrupted.

“Then what? Why are you doing this?”

“Because you were right. I don’t want to be a vampire and I don’t want to make you watch me grow old and die,” you told him, trying to stay strong.

“I’d rather have you for sixty years than just six months. Please, hummingbird, I know what I’m getting myself into, we can -”

“I kissed Matt.” It fell from your lips and caused Billy to immediately fall silent and Karen to glare at you. Your cheeks warmed and your stomach continued to twist and churn, and you wanted nothing more than for the ground to open up and swallow you whole.

“What?” He finally asked.

“The night of the party, we kissed -” you sighed, “- I’ve broken all of your rules, Billy. All I’ve done since I’ve got here is cause problems for you and all your friends and I’m so tired of feeling like I’m in the way, like I can’t even look after myself.”

Your gaze was fixed on the table again, not wanting to see what Karen thought about any of this.

“No, you’re wrong. No one thinks that. I don’t think that. I can’t let you go. I won’t,” he tried to tell but all you could hear was your own heartbeat echoing in your ears, “I don’t care what you did. I’m coming to get you, I’m -”

“Goodbye, Billy.”

Without further warning, you hung up, put the phone on the table and got to your feet.

“Where are you going?” Karen asked.

“You told him where we are, didn’t you?”

“What? You heard me talking to him, I never -”

“He said he’s coming to get me. I heard him getting into a car.”

It shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did. Even though she’d always tried to be there for you, Karen was Billy’s friend before she was yours and you didn’t want to blame her for protecting him, but it stung. You’d wanted more time, you’d wanted to be able to say goodbye properly.

“Look, if this is really what you want, then I won’t let him take you back,” Karen told you. “But you should at least talk to him.”

“I just did,” you answered, hating how difficult this was becoming. “Please, just let me go. This is best for everyone.”

“Wait -”

“I’m sorry, Karen. I can’t,” you tried so damned hard to keep yourself from falling apart. “Please, don’t follow me.”

She tried to say something, but you didn’t wait to hear it. You headed for the door.

Stepping out onto the sidewalk, you almost walked into someone. Or, rather they almost walked into you.

”In a hurry?”

The voice sparked a glimmer of recognition in you, a memory that you could only half remember. When you looked, your stomach turned itself inside out.

”Oh, so you do remember me?” Krista smiled, her hand wrapping around your arm. “Come on now, let’s not make a scene.”

At first you tried to pull away from her, but then her eyes caught yours and she spoke again. Everything around you seemed to melt away and, soon enough, it felt like Krista was the only other person in the whole wide world, and the only thing you wanted to do was whatever she asked you to.

”You want to come with me,” she told you, her tone soothing, convincing. “You want me to take you away from all of your problems. You want to be free of this whole mess.”

As much as you wanted to fight it, you found yourself stepping towards the curb, your suitcase and purse quickly abandoned as you were ushered into the back of a limousine before you came to your senses and realised what a mistake you’d made.

“I told you there was nowhere you could run that I wouldn’t find you,” he smiled at you as Krista closed the door behind you and watched as the limo pulled away from the curb, leaving you trapped with him.

***************************

He’d been staring at the clock for over an hour and, every time he looked away, he was sure it skipped back a couple of minutes. Frank was still talking. He’d been talking non-stop since he’d first walked in Billy’s office, starting with the boring financial stuff and then going on to trying to update him on a couple of Anvil’s on-going missions.

But Billy didn’t care about any of that.

All he could think about was you, picturing you curled up in his bed, waiting for him to get home.

He was thinking about the way you’d moaned his name, how good it had felt to come inside you, and how much he was looking forward to doing it all over and over again.

“You even listenin’ to me?” Frank barked, jolting Billy from his thoughts.

“Yeah, Frankie, the senator wants security for his fundraiser,” Billy answered, resisting the urge to roll his eyes and affect a smart-ass tone about it. “And congressman Steven’s is -”

His heart threatened to stop the moment his phone lit up with Lissa’s name. He couldn’t think why she’d be calling, unless something had happened.

Had you been hurt? Were you sick? Panic and dread warred inside of him as he answered the phone, but nothing prepared him for what came next. He answered frantically, nothing giving her a chance to speak at first, asking if something had happened, if something was wrong.

Lissa explained the situation, telling him that you’d left.

Billy was beside himself at the news.

“You didn’t try to stop her?” He demanded, ignoring the look that Frank was giving him from across the room.

“My job is to ensure that the letter of the law is followed in these arrangements, you know I am not allowed to hold people against their wills,” Lissa answered back curtly. “I did, however, ensure that she had Ms Page’s number.”

“Karen? She’s gone to Karen?”

Mention of Karen suddenly had Frank’s attention.

Lissa started to say something but Billy quickly cut her off, thanking her for letting him know and quickly hanging up.

“The fuck’s goin’ on, Bill?” Frank asked, and Billy quickly explained.

“Call Karen, find out where the hell she is,” he told his friend, his desperation quickly prompting Frank into action.

While Frank tried to get through to Karen, Billy found your number on your employment records and started to call you, getting nothing but a full voicemail. Then he started to text.

Please, let’s talk about this.

Don’t leave me.

I don’t want you to go.

Why are you doing this?

Please, talk to me.

“Karen won’t tell me where they’re meetin’,” Frank sighed, “says she wants to talk to her first and find out what’s goin’ on.”

“Can we track her phone?”

“I’m not lettin’ you track Karen’s phone, Bill. You outta your fuckin’ mind?”

“Damn right I’m out of my mind,” Billy snapped. “I can’t lose her. I’m not going to lose her. Not now.”

He kept trying to call you, kept sending messages, thinking over all the places that you might end up. Eventually, he tried calling Karen and was genuinely shocked when she answered. In the background he could hear the tell tale sounds of a bar; people talking, music, and the clatter of a pool table.

“Is she with you? Is she okay? Is she safe? Has she told you what’s going on?” Billy didn’t give Karen any time to answer. “You’re at that place in Hell’s Kitchen, aren’t you? The place with the pool tables - the one you and Murdock go to. Josie’s.”

And, a second later, Karen said yes.

“Put her on, let me talk to her. Please, Karen,” he pleaded. “I need to talk to her.”

He was already halfway out of his office when he heard your voice, and the conversation that followed caused his chest to ache. No matter what he said, you seemed set on leaving him, and Billy couldn’t let you. He couldn’t just give up without a fight.

He didn’t even realise that Frank was following him to the parking lot until you hung up on him.

“Don’t you dare try to talk me out of this, Frankie,” Billy warned as he got into his car.

“I’m just comin’ along to make sure you don’t do anythin’ stupid.”

It didn’t take long to reach Josie’s. You’d only been gone five minutes by the time he got there. Both men were rushing towards the door, hoping that, somehow, Karen had managed to keep you there, but Billy stopped in the street. Something caught his attention; an abandoned suitcase and purse by the curb.

“Bill, what’s -” Frank started, watching Billy veer off.

“This is hers,” he said.

“How can you tell?”

His heart almost stopped completely when he tugged Bill the Beagle out of the case.

“I gave her this.”

Frantically, he started looking up and down the street, trying to figure out where you might have gone and why you might have left your things behind. It didn’t make sense. Nothing made sense.

He barely heard Frank muttering something about Karen before charging into the bar to look for her.

Billy tried calling your phone, only for it to start ringing in your abandoned purse and he knew that there was no way that you would willingly leave your things like this. There was no way you’d take the stuff beagle from the penthouse if you didn’t want it anymore.

His ears started to ring, a sense of panic filling him. He’d lost you. You were gone and he was pretty sure that something bad had happened to you. He clutched the stuffed toy to his chest as his vision started to tunnel.

You were gone.

“No,” he muttered, “no-no-no...”

He could practically feel the thing inside of him clawing and trying to get out. You were his and you were gone. Someone had taken what was his and he would tear down the whole fucking city to get you back

A hand on his shoulder pulled him back from the brink, but it didn’t stop him from snarling, from grabbing Frank by the collar and shoving him backwards, lashing out for the sake of lashing out.

And then he saw Karen.

“Where is she?” His tone was sharp enough to cause her to step back.

A moment later Frank had him by the throat, forcing him back.

“Get your shit together,” he told Billy, keeping a tight grip while Billy thrashed against him.

“Where is she?” He snarled again.

“I don’t know,” Karen answered, holding up her hands in surrender, trying to soothe him. “But we’re going to find her, okay?”

Billy kept squirming, kept fighting against Frank, desperate to rip and tear and shred his way across the city until you were safely in his arms again. Frank shook him, pushing him back until he was pressed against his car.

“You’re wastin’ time fuckin’ about like this, Bill,” he told him, “you want to save her, then you’re gonna have to calm the fuck down an' think rationally.”

Part of Billy knew that Frank was right, but the noise in his head felt too loud. He forced a couple of deep breaths, knowing that he couldn’t help you if he couldn’t figure out where you were.

“Fine,” he snapped. “I’m fine. Let me go.”

Reluctantly, Frank let him go, but his eyes stayed fixed on Billy, watching his every move. Everyone knew that he wasn’t entirely back in control, but they all seemed to agree that they couldn’t waste any more time if they wanted to find you.

“What happened?” Billy asked, and Karen quickly recounted everything that had happened and everything you had told her.

“She asked me not to follow, so I didn’t,” Karen said. “I thought she was going to head to the bus station, but there’s no way she’d leave without her things, unless -”

She fell instantly silent, leaving both men staring at her.

“Unless what?” Billy prompted, his sharp tone earning him an equally sharp look of warning from Frank.

“She asked me not to tell you...”

“Karen, c’mon, she might be in danger,” Frank prompted before Billy could lose his temper again.

Karen sighed. “The guy that’s been claiming to be her fiance, he’s part of the Maggia.”

“What?” Billy dared to take a step forward, but immediately stopped when Frank tensed.

“Her parents owe him money. He wanted her as a partial payment. She didn’t want you to know,” She explained. “She didn't say a lot, but I know she’s scared of him.”

Billy felt sick. It felt like the world was spinning too fast and he was barely hanging on. All the little comments you’d made about not having a choice with this other guy slowly playing over in his mind. He had to get you back.

He had to kill whoever had taken you.

“How are we gonna find this prick?” Frank asked.

“I have an idea,” Karen offered, “but I don’t think you’re going to like it.”

She reached into her purse and pulled out a business card, handing it to Billy.

“Agent Dinah Madani, Homeland Security?” Billy read out. “Why the fuck do you have some Homeland agent’s card?”

“It’s a long fucking story and we really don’t have time for it,” Karen answered.

End Note : Sorry to keep ending things on cliffhangers. I'm not entirely doing it on purpose (just mostly). Thanks so much for all the lovely comments on the last chapter, I haven't had time to reply to things yet I'll hopefully try to do that later. As I said last week, I've been busy this week so I'm really behind 😅 As always thank you so much for reading/liking/commenting/reblogging and generally screaming about all of Billy and readers bad choices throughout this. Hope you have a great weekend!!

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters! If tagging doesn't work for some reason (aka Tumblr being dumb) I post most Fridays around 7:30 gmt.

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@snowkestrel @danzer8705 @noortsshift @aoi-targaryen @lincerad

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@sweetserendipity65 @damagelove @strangerfromketterdam @a-starrynightwith-u @readingabouthim

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#billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo x female reader #the punisher #billy russo fanfic #(ob)ts ff #billy russo imagine

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atinyniki · 1 year ago

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just kiss me already!

group: stray kids !

pairing: nonidol!bangchan x f!reader

genre: fluff, angst, suggestive at the end

warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, fighting (verbal), 3racha chan (songs unreleased), friends with current skz members, suggestive

authors note: this shit actually sucks but i tried even tho i had no motivation. ill make another chan fic soon to compensate. this is also not proofread. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 2858

“oh my gosh you bitch”

“hey! don’t call me a bitch just because you suck at the game”

you haven’t one a single game against chan since he came over.

“i don’t wanna play anymore”, you say with a pout.

“awh come onnn don’t be a sore loser”, he smirks.

it’s not that you don’t wanna play because you’re losing, you just don’t want to play because you both have been at it for four hours.

“let’s watch a show instead!”

“fine, but i’m choosing.”

it’s pretty easy to get chan to do what you want. you’re his weakness, he’ll do anything to make you happy to be honest. you never seem to notice the way he looks at you, or how much he tries to get your attention.

on the other hand, you absolutely adore chan. not just the way he looked, even though he is incredibly beautiful, but you admire how caring he is. at first it was just minor attraction, but then you got closer and well… you know.

neither of you realize you’ve loved each other for so long.

“chan? can you come over please? it’s important”

“yeah of course i’m on my way”

within the next two minutes he was in front of your door. “what’s wrong? are you okay?”

you laugh a little when you see the look on his face. “chan i’m fine, i just need help.”

“so you made me run all the way here for nothing?

you drag him to the kitchen and close the door behind you, rolling your eyes. “i never asked you to run here dumbass. you literally live next door”

chan walks into the kitchen and freezes when he sees the state of it. bowls everywhere, flour and batter scattered all over the countertop, and an assortment of cookie cutters placed next to the stan mixer.

“listen, i really need to make two hundred cookies within the next two hours. my oven can’t hold more than twenty four at a time. could you maybe bake like half of them in your oven?”

“why would you need two hundred cookies…?”, he asks incredulously.

“it’s my friends birthday tomorrow. she loves these cookies”

“oh jeez… okay fine. how long do i need to bake them for?”

“twenty six minutes…”

“yes ma’am, ill be on my way then”. he quickly grabs the trays of cookies and gives you a peck on your forehead, lips lingering for a second too long, and runs back to his house.

you could still feel his lips on you, but you continued swapping out trays in hopes to distract yourself.

chan didn’t burn a single cookie. your friend loved them.

“hyung come on! don’t be a wuss”, jisung pouts.

“no jisung. not happening”

“hey well you’re the one that chose dareeee”,

“fine i’ll just take a shot.”

the entire circle broke out into disappointed groans, but you decided to move on from chan.

“y/n! truth or dare”

you jerk your head towards lily, “what? who said it’s my turn?!”

“me. now answer”, lily says a matter-of-fact-ly

“fine. dare”

“you. chan. seven minutes in heaven. right now.”

you look over to chan, silently asking for permission with your eyes despite how nervous you look. you know you don’t have to do anything but… what if he wants to? no. he would never. he doesn’t like you like that.

both of you get up and walk into the room, and changbin quickly turns the lights off and leaves.

“do the lights really have to be off?”

chan walks over to the light switch, hands fumbling to find the knob. he slowly turns it so that the lights are dimmed, but enough so that you both can still see.

chan walks over to the bed, patting the part of the bed next to him and inviting you to sit down. you silently walk towards the bed and sit down, instantly covering yourself with the blanket.

“it’s freezing in here… how does seungmin survive in a room like this?”

“hm… no wonder his personality is always so cold.”

you both laugh a little at chans comment. seungmin has a thing for tormenting chan. subconsciously, you cuddle up to chan, still shivering a bit from the cold.

he seems to get the memo, wrapping his arms around you and holding you close. moments of silence pass, and it’s been far too long without a sound for it to not be awkward.

suddenly, chan feels a weight on his shoulder and turns to look at it. you’re sound asleep, he accounts it to either your tipsiness or your exhaustion from working all day.

he holds your hand for a bit, the warmth of it passing through your whole body and causing you to let out a satisfied hum in your sleep. he grabs his phone to text changbin.

“y/n fell asleep. we’ll be in here for a while if that’s okay. you can continue without us”

“yeah yeah whatever just say you want to make out with her in peace”

“shut up changbin.“

the next morning, you wake up in chans bed. your head starts ringing and you think about what happened the night before. you’re slowly starting to become aware of your surroundings, and the snoring coming from beside you.

“chan. chan wake up”

“mmmhh”

“chan what happened last night”

“hm?”, he says as he finally peaks his head out of the covers.

his senses slowly come back to him, and his face instantly flushes red, the crimson color kissing his collarbone too. you’re dressed in his shirt that’s far too large for you, with a pair of his shorts on. the shirt reaches all the way down to your mid-thigh, even while sitting down.

you look at him, waiting for him to answer. “chan are you okay?”

“hm? oh yeah sorry. nothing happened don’t worry, you were just tired so i brought you home, but you insisted to stay with me”

your face flushes red, and you realize what you’re wearing. you look down, playing with the hem of the t-shirt you’re wearing. “sorry about the clothes by the way, you just looked really cold so i offered them to you”

oh. so he didn’t dress you. thank god. you don’t think you could have faced him if he did. “thank you channie.”

he smiles at you, ears going slightly red at the tips. he doesn’t want to admit what that nickname does to him, especially in your voice. you quickly get out of bed, telling chan you’ll be back soon. you go to your house to get ready for the day.

no matter how much you douse your face in cold water, the red tint doesn’t seem to fade.

“wow chan this is amazing!”

his face goes red as he chuckles, “thank you y/n”

changbin doesn’t fail to notice how shy chan gets around you, but he decides not to talk about it while you’re here. instead, he snickers with jisung in the corner.

“shut up you two. i know what you’re on about”

the both of them instantly sit up straight, going silent.

you continue listening to the rest of the tracks, loving every second of it. you give hums and nods of approval, watching the boys’ faces light up every time.

not too long after, the boys left, leaving just you and chan in his studio. you’re humming along to one of the songs he showed you earlier. he couldn’t help but smile, hoping you wouldn’t notice that it made him just a little bit too happy.

you and chan are sitting on your bed again, watching the new kdrama that just came out. your heart jumped in your chest as you watched the scene intently, the heat of it making your face flush red.

“damn when is someone gonna kiss me with that much passion”, chan jokes. you couldn’t help but laugh. you two have gotten a lot closer recently, and you’ve found out that chan is really into skinship.

he has you cuddled up with him under the blankets right now, your small arms wrapped around his bicep. you look up at him, just to admire him a little as he focuses on the show. what you didn’t expect though, was for him to turn his face only mere seconds later.

only then do you process just how close you are, how your lips are just inches away from eachother. chan seems to notice this too, his hands fidgeting with his drawstrings. he gives you a small smile, and turns his head back to the movie.

you’re probably being delusional, but you swear something had changed in the way he looked at you.

“y/n please, do something. he isn’t listening to us…”

“i’ll be there soon.”

you quickly rush over to chans house, knocking on the door to his studio.

“changbin i said leave me alone.”, chans voice was harsh. youve never heard him sound so aggressive towards anyone, he was normally really sweet. you motion to jisung and changbin to leave the room.

��i got this, it’s okay”, you whisper to them.

“chan it’s me. please open the door”

the door flies open within seconds, and you take in chans state. his hair is a mess, two dark purple splotches under his eyes. there are energy drinks scattered all over his desk, broken pencils and scattered papers.

“what… happened?

chan began to speak, but you cut him off.

“we’re going to bed. tell me what happened there”

“n-no! let me save my work at least.”

you walk in the studio with him, waiting on the couch as he quickly saved his progress. you both walk out the room, entering his bedroom and settling under the sheets.

“go to sleep, ill be here when you wake up.”

you try your best to stay up, but you just couldn’t let yourself. sleep takes over your body, eyes becoming heavy and finally fluttering shut for the night.

you wake the next morning to an unfamiliar warmth. chan has his arms around you, his head buried in your chest. you thought he looked adorable like this, until he looked up at you when he realized you woke up.

his bloodshot eyes stared back up at you, and you began to process the teardrops staining your hoodie.

you don’t say anything more. you just pull him closer, rubbing small circles along his back. “i know you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, but you need to let all this out somehow. if you need someone please call me. you know im always right here”

chan doesn’t respond, he didn’t trust his voice enough. his body trembled in your hold, nuzzling his nose into the comforting warmth of your chest.

once he’s calmed down a little, he looks up at you again. you stare at eachother for a good while, just like you did when you watched that movie. there was something different swirling in his eyes, but you just couldn’t place it.

instead of worrying about that, you quickly placed a peck on his forehead, feeling him relax in your hold. he falls back asleep not too long after. he must have been tired.

“WOOOO!!”

you hadn’t felt so alive in months. you knew it was incredibly childish, but you missed having someone to push you on the swings. chans arms pushed you so high you felt like you could touch the stars.

the moon shines so beautifully, covering the park in a light glow. you looked ethereal, that’s what chan thought at least. your bright smile lit up his whole world, your giggle making his heart flutter. the moonlight hit your face just right, your eyes shimmering in the darkness.

chan gradually slowed your swing down, not wanting you to thrash around.

“done already?”, you say with a pout.

“it’s almost one in the morning, we have to go now”, he pouts back.

you both start walking back from the park, talking about chans plans for the future with 3racha. he seems so passionate about music, his eyes lighting up every time he mentioned changbin and jisung.

you look up at him, smiling a little as how cute he sounded talking about this. he looks down at you, the same unplaceable emotion in his eyes, but you stay there for a little longer.

he smiles at you. you instinctively smile back. his smile puts his adorable dimples on display, and you bring one of your fingers up to poke them. you both break out into a fit of giggles, beginning to walk home again.

time without chan began to feel like time you’ve wasted.

“i’m not leaving”

“chan please. you need to rest”

“jeez y/n, when did you start being so clingy? the only thing i need right now is to finish this. either stay here and shut up or get the hell out. i can’t have you nagging me, this is really important”

in the three years you’ve known chan, you have never once heard him speak like this. not to you, not to anyone. you held your tears in, making sure to hide them from chan before they fell, and darted out the door.

you quickly made your way to your house, stupidly forgetting to lock your door in your upset state. you want to yell at him. not to be mean, but just to get it in his damn head that you care about him. you wish he’d just understand.

you clutch your sweatshirt in your hands, the pain in your chest was beginning to get unbearable. you quickly go inside your room and lock the door, flopping onto your bed as sobs rack your body.

not too long after, you hear knocking on your door.

“y/n?”, you hear chan call out for you.

you make your way to the bedroom door, sliding down onto the floor. you don’t think you’re ready to face him yet. “what do you want”

chan was taken aback by the sharp tone in your voice. he knew it was coming, he just didn’t expect it to hurt so bad.

“i’m sorry. i know you only meant good and wanted me to be okay but… i just have so much left to do. i’m overwhelmed and scared im not going to be able to get everything done on time and i lashed out at you. i know that’s no excuse to hurt someone you love but i really didn’t mean it. i’m so-“

“chan you’re rambling again”, you pout.

“oh i’m sorry…”

you quickly open the door, helping chan off of the floor. you quickly bring him to your bed and force him to lay down. “sleep. please”

he could tell you’ve almost lost your patience, so he huddles up closer to you and lets sleep overtake his body. “goodnight y/n. thank you”

today, you wake up to a different sight than usual. normally, chans face is buried in your chest or he’s hugging you from behind. this time was different. he was mere centimeters away from you, nose brushing against yours.

you quickly shut your eyes, hoping you didn’t go red at just the sight of him.

not too long after, chan wakes and gets ready for the day, coming back into your home to see you already awake.

you were dressed in a large grey t-shirt. you don’t quite remember where it came from, but it’s incredibly comfortable.

chan recognizes it instantly. it’s the shirt he gave you the first night you slept over at his house. his heart swelled at the sight, wishing he could see you in his clothes everyday.

without a second thought, he quickly runs towards you, sitting on the bed right next to you again. he’s looking at you the same way he has been for the past couple months.

this time around though, he does something different. his hand makes his way up to cup your cheek, his big hands swallowing some of your jawline too.

he slowly moves his face closer to you, now only inches away from your lips. your heart rate quickens, feeling his breath fan over your lips.

“chan, just kiss me already. please.”

he tentatively moves closer, not getting a chance to process before you crash your lips into his. it’s a kiss of pure want and need. “fuck y/n. i’ve been waiting to do this for so long”

“i love you channie”, you whispered breathlessly.

a flip switched inside of him, immediately pushing you down onto your back while he hovered over you. he kisses at your jawline, red marks appearing all over your neck. “i love you so much baby”, he says in between kisses.

you couldn’t hold back your whimpers, the feeling was too much for you to handle. all of a sudden, you heard a loud ringing.

chan picked up his phone, sounding a little aggravated. “hello?”

“chan where are you?”, jisung asked him

“i’m with y/n. we’re watching a movie. why?”

“oh sorry my bad. have-“

he hung up before jisung could finish, eager to get back to you.

“now, where were we?”

#skz #skz x reader #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids x reader #stray kids #stray kids angst #skz fanfic #skz bang chan #bang chan #bang chan x reader #bang chan x y/n #stray kids x y/n

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chimini3 · 1 year ago

Text

Saudade

Saudade (n.) a nostalgic longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant, or that has been loved and then lost; “the love that remains”

Pairing: BTS OT7 x reader

Synopsis: Amidst their preparations for the upcoming promotions, the boys neglect you at your worst times and you make a decision that forces them to realize just how much they miss and need you.

Notes: this was written in the middle of exam week because I didn’t wanna study soooo enjoyy how my brain rots and manifest into my writing quality. I think all of them are a bit stupid in here too (just like how i was when writing this)

Word Count: 21.6k

Getting into a relationship with an idol was not one for the faint of heart. You knew the troubles and problems that came along with it and you weren’t blind. You knew of the NDAs and the contracts that would be pushed to you by management to keep everything confidentially under wraps. You knew of the disgust some people would look towards you with when you walked through their work building. You knew of the potential risks of receiving hate and possibly ruining the reputation of your lover once word gets out, though that never stopped your love from running away from them. That never stopped them from loving you fonder, and making it known to the people that they can share it to that they loved you.

The way they would hold onto your hand just the right amount when you walked past the HYBE building lobby and hallways. The way that they would eat with you in the building’s cafeteria and proudly showing how much they enjoyed your company even with staff and other artists throwing an occasional glance at your table. They didn’t hold back when they took you out on private expensive dinner dates or public dates with minimal identity hiding accessories because they weren’t afraid to payout any media outlets that threatened to leak your identity. They didn’t even care when gossip went out that they were in a relationship with video evidence to prove that they slung their arm over your shoulder and lightly kissed you on the top of your head. They didn’t care. They only drew the line when an official media outlet captured the side of your face and immediately asked for the footage to be erased off the face of the earth with a good amount of bills to compensate, though they were berated by their management to at least be a little more careful considering other media outlets were fully in for the gossip and not for the payout. This also led to management apprehensively making the decision that you shouldn't be traveling with the boys to America since the company doesn’t have power over any of their media outlets, much to your lover’s dismay. Or should you say… lovers.

There was one thing they loved to show off silently when they spent time with personal friends and that was the family they had on their lockscreen, proudly showing all eight of you. Each lover had a different picture, though they all held the small polyamorous family that you had gathered.

Yes, you were in a relationship with all the members and no, that didn’t make life easier. At first you were totally apprehensive of the idea though as you spent more time with all of them and saw just how much love they held for each other as they held for you. You realized that loving them all equally wouldn’t be that hard and truly it wasn’t.

Your relationship with all of them came naturally. No, there was never a time you mixed them up or moaned the wrong name. No, your heart didn’t flutter for a certain member more than it did the other. You loved them all equally just as much as they loved each other and the transition of them loving an extra person came with ease.

They all managed to have their one-on-one time with you in a week whilst simultaneously spending time with the other members as lovers. Your relationship came straight out of a fanfic plot, and you’d giggle to yourself every time you remember that fact even if that caused your boyfriends to send a questioning glance at you.

However, with happiness comes sadness. The issues in dating one idol had multiplied itself to seven and no matter the bright smiles you had when you were together, it was the silent moments you had to yourself that truly planted worries of how relationships like this would work.

Surely they didn’t see a future in spending the rest of their lives sharing a lover with their bandmates, and you would be lying to yourself if you didn’t have moments of having zero energy left in you to give them all the love they deserved whilst simultaneously working on things for yourself like your job and personal interest. Although their tight reassurance made it feel better, the thoughts would always come back to haunt your mind and all of this build up had gathered before a particularly long stint of performances and media duties the band had in America.

It was a particularly long stint of argument piled on top of arguments. It was as if all you guys could do was argue. One night it would be Jin and Taehyung and the other would be Jimin and Namjoon. Sometimes it would even be all eight of you arguing over the dining table as the food you cooked for them grows colder with each shouting battle.

There were moments you weren’t proud of how you handled them, though you couldn’t simply agree that it was all your fault. The boys’ schedules were getting busier as the days to their American promotions got closer and you were all aware of the unavailability they would be on to care and give you attention. You have been in a relationship with them for long enough to know that it was unavoidable in a relationship with an idol and frankly you didn’t care if your relationship had turned more of you giving and them taking since you knew they would be returning your love soon after their schedules. It was standard when dating an idol.

What changed this time around though was that they were coming home tired and vile. Each night you would make an effort to help clean up the dorm after your job to lessen the work for the staff that cleans their space. Each night you would make an effort to let them come home to a warm and healthy home cooked meal, only for each and every one of them to swipe it under the rug as they open the door with another argument on their lips.

Sometimes it was okay though. Most of the time, they were still your loving boyfriends in the mornings before their schedules. They just would come home tired and silent, barely giving you any attention though you understood that they couldn’t give you much after their tiring schedules.

However, everything came to a halt when news of a beloved cousin’s death rang through your phone one afternoon. Sickness had won and you hadn’t even known they were sick. The same cousin that you’d visit during spring break to help your aunt and uncle’s harvest season on their farm. The same cousin who would teach you new games that Seoul kids never knew, who gave you plenty of advice on highschool and boys, who you practically considered as an older sibling.

The news struck you hard. The boys knew of this cousin to hold a special place in your heart and you had a breakdown when you found out of their passing. If you needed someone to comfort you then you really needed it then, though inconveniently the same day the news hit was the same day the boys had a particularly ugly argument on their new choreography. Everyone had something to say at the dining table and you could only look numbly at the takeout food you had ordered as you still couldn’t process the death on your own.

That brings you to the next morning. Three weeks before the boys go to America for a whole month, and a decision laid heavily on your mind.

[08:59] Y/N: Hey, are you still at the dorm?

[09:00] Namjoon: We just left, princess. We’ll see each other later at dinner, okay?

[9:01] Seokjin: We’ll apologize and make up later, sweetheart. We heard you went home late last night. You should’ve just stayed at the dorm to rest.

No, you couldn’t. You were sure that if you had slept in one of their beds then they would vent to you about their latest argument or perhaps be too tired to even know you were sleeping beside them, so you opted to commute back to your apartment despite the time being eleven in the evening already.

[9:05] Y/N: Don’t worry about it, Jin. I took the day off today, so I could still catch up on sleep.

[9:06] Yoongi: We weren’t worried about that, hun.

[9:06] Hoseok: You should’ve at least let one of our drivers drive you. It’s dangerous commuting late at night, beautiful. And you know that.

You smiled at their caring words, though you were sure the decision on your mind wouldn’t change anytime soon.

[9:08] Y/N: Yeah, I know, but it’s fine though. I’ll talk to you guys later.

You quickly turned your phone off as you rolled in bed. The warmth of the sun shining through your window did nothing to heat up the cold feeling you had inside you, and you were sure that it was about to get colder when you get to the the dorm.

[3 months earlier]

“What’s on your mind?” You asked as Namjoon sighed and took a seat on the patio sofa beside you.

The cold breeze of the night engulfing the two of you though the heat of some Soju the eight of you had been drinking earlier was enough to warm you up from under the blanket you hid yourself in.

After a round of drinks to celebrate the beginning of the boy’s new album release date getting announced, and the soon to be endless practice sessions and meetings they would partake in as they were due to promote mostly in America. You excused yourself and sat on the boy’s dorm balcony to ground yourself before you would reside in one of their rooms for the night.

“Just… scared.” Namjoon answers honestly as he leans back on the sofa and you snuggle up beside him to share your fluffy white blanket to keep him warm. His hand came to rest on your thigh as he drew weird imaginary lines on your skin. It was something he usually did when you’d let him open up to you. His little fidget to calm the rest of his body as he focuses his mind on spilling out of his lips.

“Of what?” You asked softly as your ears were trained to hear any of his worries. You were always lending an ear for any of their vents.

You found that a relationship should always be a balance of listening and ranting. You would rant about your random events at work and some random topic you deemed interesting for a discussion whilst they usually vented to you about their tiresome schedule and music related rants. Of course your younger boyfriends would occasionally gossip to you too, though you considered that more of a past time for you to bond over rather than something that required your attention and ear despite not knowing much about what they speak about.

“Promotions in America are always tiring and difficult. I sometimes feel like I’m not allowed to say my own thoughts on a question because I’m always busy translating for them…” Namjoon avoids your eyes as he continues to keep his head leaned back and looking towards the balcony ceiling.

“But they’ve been working so hard on their English lessons. I’m sure they can help translate and answer in English now.” You reasoned to help calm his worries down though it did little to ease the leader.

“Yeah, but I still have to be constantly tuned in. I can’t slip up, and we’ll have to do it for almost a month straight. We’re leaving you here for a whole month…”

“You’re not leaving me, Joonie. You’re doing your job and promoting your album.” You tried to reassure though the man just looked down to look you in the eyes and you can tell the alcohol was slightly tainting him to be more emotionally vocal.

“Still, it feels like we’re leaving you. We’ll miss your birthday…” Namjoon frowns and you giggle at your boyfriend with a shake of your head.

“Babe, I think I’ll be fine. We can celebrate after you get back home. Just worry about doing a good job and making me proud.” You smiled as the man just nodded at your reassuring words and you let him bask in the silence of the crickets chirping in the night.

You were pretty sure he had even dozed off due to the alcohol and the time reaching midnight, though he immediately sat up straighter and offered to walk you back into the apartment where he opts to retreat in his room earlier than usual though you knew he was just a bit stressed from the planning.

You walked to sit on the sofa of the living room with Hobi. He was seemingly already dozing off whilst catching up on a drama he was watching and you placed your blanket over him as he seemingly opened his eyes a little hazy from sleep though smiling at your affectionate action.

“Wanna watch with me?” Hobi’s voice hums out as you glanced at the television though shook your head and instead leaned down to kiss his peach cheeks that came from drinking too much alcohol than expected.

“I’ll go make sure the three aren’t causing trouble. You rest up.” You whispered softly and the man hummed though he was already snuggling further into your blanket with closed eyes.

You smiled down at him before you took the remote and lowered the sounds of the television down and walked towards the panel of the Smart Home system installed in the apartment to turn the lights dimmer though not completely off.

After that, you walked past the dining room and kitchen to reach a small corridor where you can hear Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook’s laughter reverberating through the walls. After dinner and the drinking session they had excused themselves to Taehyung and Jungkook’s room, which you were sure meant that they would be drinking more considering Jungkook liked keeping a small mini fridge in his room in case he got hungry in the middle of the night despite having their room as the closest to the kitchen.

You knocked on the door and pushed it open to see your three boyfriends sitting on the carpeted floor between Taehyung and Jungkook’s bed with a board game in between them. Their faces turning to you as you flashed them a sweet smile though their faces looked like it was up to something mischievous.

“Hey baby!” Taehyung greeted you with a wide grin as he patted the space beside him for you to sit on.

“I thought you guys would be drinking some more in secret… not playing a board game. You could’ve played outside and the others could join.” You said as you sat criss crossed on the carpet and eyed your boyfriends.

Jungkook sat with a leg brought up his chest and another laying flat as he leaned on the side of his bed. Taehyung also leaned on the side of his bed though he sat criss crossed whilst Jimin sat in between their beds and directly across you with his back mere inches away from the bedside table though he didn’t lean on it.

“They looked tired already… and this game isn’t any normal game.” Jungkook said as you raised a brow at what he meant and looked down on the board.

It looked normal at first glance though when you really looked at the board and its contents you understood why the three had such mischief laced on their eyes. Your eyes then went to one of the pawns standing on a box that said ‘Remove a piece of clothing’ and you quickly scanned the room to see Jimin’s sweater discarded on top of Jungkook’s bed.

“Wanna join?” Jimin asked with this teasingly innocent tone as he flashed you a grin that seemed to challenge you.

Though you really liked the idea of their mischief, you knew that the night had been long and after the celebrations you would prefer to cuddle up with one of your lovers rather than fucking, but the expecting eyes of your three boyfriends were simply too much to reject.

Yoongi had told you plenty of times that you should start standing your ground when the three would be up to trouble though it seems like you can just never say no to the cute faces they give you when they plan something mischievous.

One time, the three of them planned to trick Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hobi by planting something on their computers that made it look like their files had been corrupted. After persuading Pdogg to help them figure out all the technicalities and you to distract their hyungs for a while the plan was on and it did not go well for the three afterwards. The three of your older boyfriends did not take to the prank as funny and had heavily reprimanded the three to stay out of their computers and studios until the end of time, as if it wasn’t already a rule. They also had a ‘serious’ discussion with you about allowing this behavior from them though you had defended them and told them that you weren’t their mother, they were also just having fun and you didn’t see the problem in that. Despite all this, the slight disagreement was fixed with nothing but a soft kiss on the lips of your stubborn rap line boyfriends and a smile that showed your pearly whites before you giddly walked out and into the comfort of the only lover that had laughed with you during the whole fiasco, though his windshield wiper laugh was definitely louder than yours.

“Fine… but I’m not sleeping with any of you tonight. You need to get up bright and early for tomorrow’s practices and I don’t want your staff sending me death glares because I gave you hickies.” You huffed though the three of them only laughed and Jungkook leaned towards you to plant a light kiss on your lips as Jimin handed you a pawn of your favorite color.

“Roll and move the amount of numbers you land on.” Taehyung explained as Jimin said “Simple,” with a pop of the letter ‘p’ in English.

You rolled the dice as it landed on the face that had six dots. You smiled, flashing all three of them a cheeky smile before you leaned and used an arm to support you as you moved your pawn six boxes from the starting line.

“Lucky.” Taehyung mutters under his breath as you assume that the pawn that was a box behind you was his.

“Strip a piece of clothing.” Jungkook says as they eye which part you’d remove, though luckily for you, you had Yoongi’s Fila sweater on. A sweater that he was sure he lost, though you had actually just forgotten to return after he left it at your apartment.

“Starting off easy.” Jimin says as you pull the sweater off from the top of your head, leaving you in a light gray cotton spaghetti strap top and your black and white dolphin shorts.

You thought you were safe, though the way their eyes looked you up and down made it seem as if you were practically naked. A realization dawning on you that you weren’t wearing a bra and the cotton material was probably not hiding much to the imagination. However, you only shook your head at how easily they can be worked up with your presence its as if they are constantly deprived of your appearance.

“I just realized how you rarely stay in the dorm without one of our sweaters on.” Jimin says as you handed him the dice since you don’t know who’s next though he easily forwards it to Jungkook.

“I like it. We should throw away all our sweaters.” Jungkook suggests as you shake your head.

“Your dorm is freezing from the air conditioning, so I would still bring my own sweater if you don’t give me yours.” You shrugged as Jungkook rolled for his turn at the same time Taehyung let out a ‘pfft’ sound.

“As if you even own sweaters.” He rolls his eyes as you flash him an offended face. You did in fact have sweaters that are yours though they fitted you terribly. One was oddly fitted where it was skin tight on your arms though loose on your torso and another reached your knees from a failed attempt of trying to replicate your boyfriends’ sweater size so that you wouldn’t keep borrowing theirs.

You threw your sweater on top of Jungkook’s bed with Jimin’s sweater. As you watch Jungkook’s roll stop on three dots. He reached forward to move his pawn which you now knew was the one ahead of all the other pawns before he landed on a spot that said ‘Safe’.

“Lucky.” The three of you all muttered and you all let out chuckles at how you were so synchronized with the one English word you spoke.

“You all share a brain now.” Jungkook commented as he passed the dice to Jimin.

“We said it with the same annotations and everything.” Taehyung said, somewhat proud at the fact that your minds were all synched, that you had muttered one English word with such wholeness.

Jimin threw the dice as the room quieted down once more and it landed on the face of one dot.

“Ooh, Jimin ah, you’re catching up to me.” Taehyung teased as Jimin moved his pawn one spot forward which made his pawn only four spaces behind Taehyung's and three from yours.

“Dirty talk for 30 seconds.” You read out loud as Jimin chuckled. Dirty talk was his forte, how unlucky for you. You really wanted to get out of this room with the pride of getting the three of them riled up with their shenanigans and you unscathed and sleeping with a goodnight’s kiss only.

“I don’t like counting time. Not when I know I can fuck all three of you all night.” Jimin said with a sultry voice and the sudden demeanor of the air in the room changed as his eyes ridded of the innocent wide look and settled to their siren shape.

“Wanna take Jungkook’s shirt off right now. Wanna see the muscles you spend more time working on than spending time with us. Want you to roll one on your next turn and land on ‘Strip a piece of clothing’ and lose to me, so that I can do whatever I want with you tonight.” Jimin says with his eyes fully taking in Jungkook’s figure though when he’s finished, he immediately turns his head to you and slightly tilts it to the side and lets his eyes run up and down your body.

“You’re not safe from me either. You might not want it now, but I know you’ll give in any other day, and don’t you fucking dare put on a sweater around the dorm anymore where I can’t see your cute little nipples through your shirt.” Jimin says with a grunt to his voice and you let your eyes look down and see how your nipples had perked up to the mention of them.

A slight fluster powdered your face as you realized that Jimin scooted closer to you to run a hand from your thigh to the cloth of your shirt though you immediately grabbed hold of it before it could do anything more than hover over your nipples. You looked into his lust filled eyes as he raised a teasing brow that seemed to beg for you to slap it off his face.

“No touching. It only says dirty talk.” You reminded, as Jimin lets out a chuckle and broke eye contact to look down before he brings his hand back and gathers his confidence back together for Taehyung.

“And for you… I want to remind you just how much I hate it when you forget your honorifics when addressing me.” Jimin leans towards Taehyung now, though he never places a hand on him due to your reminder earlier.

“I’m older than you Taehyung ah, remember that. I’m your daddy—“

“Oh hell nawh! That’s cringey hyung!” Jungkook interrupts as Taehyung bows his head down at the fact that laughter had erupted so suddenly from his throat. The four of you were laughing hysterically by now.

Hey, a daddy kink isn’t cringey. Don’t get Jungkook’s words messed up. More than one of your boyfriends have it and others have something somewhat similar to it and it definitely turns you on.

You guys were just laughing at how unexpectedly Jimin brings it up, and how from the beginning of his dirty talk with Taehyung, the younger already looked purple on the face from how much he wanted to laugh at the fact that you had reminded Jimin of the rules though he held his laughter to not ruin the mood. Jimin’s tone and inflection of the Hangul syllables also already sounded forced too huskily, unlike his normal dirty talking. So when he randomly stops his Korean to say the English word ‘daddy’ was simply more of a comedic script than something to get your lover riled up.

“Okay that was worse than what I could’ve done, but at least Jungkook got pretty riled up.” Jimin says as he leans back on the wooden bedside table as all your eyes point at Jungkook who shifted in his clothes uncomfortably.

“He’s in your mind already, Jungkookie. I can tell you're not winning anymore.” You teased as he shakes his head and shifts his posture to see the board more clearly from his laid back position.

“My turn!” Taehyung states excitedly as he throws the dice and lands on six.

“Yes!” He cheers as Jungkook groans at the fact that Taehyung was now in the space behind him.

“Give the opponent a one minute massage.” You read out as Taehyung turned to look at Jimin.

“One minute is too much! You know who really needs a massage right now?” Taehyung smirks as our eyes land on Jimin, and we all simultaneously agree that this box could be used for some good rather than something sexual for the sake of Jimin and his chronic back and neck pains.

“I got to a chiropractor now. You don’t have to this. Make the game sexual.” Jimin whines as Taehyung gets up and kneels behind Jimin.

As a dancer, it doesn’t matter how much you rest and warm up or cool down properly. Eventually, you will experience chronic muscle pains and the muscles affected depend on your technique. You realized that Hoseok’s technique has him heavily relying on his knees and ankles for movement and therefore his knees and ankles tend to flare up more often. You even give him special massages sometimes when the pain gets too bad though he often tolerates it better by taking a melatonin pill and going to bed to see his chiropractor the following morning. Jimin on the other hand loves to stay up late despite how his body feels. Undoubtedly, the muscle pains worsen through overworking and therefore Jimin handles it worse more often than not.

“Serio—“ Jimin’s words were cut off by a groan as Taehyung’s hand squeezed the skin on the base of Jimin’s neck. Jimin’s head fell limp as it leaned back to relax on Taehyung’s wrists as he continued massaging Jimin.

“Fuck. That’s so good, Tae.” Jimin moans as he closes his eyes in pure bliss.

As Taehyung moved to the different areas of Jimin’s neck and back one thing was becoming more apparent. Jimin’s moaning was definitely not from the massage but rather him teasing the younger by continuously praising him for his massage. A gruffed groan and a sound of silence from Jimin would usually tell you that the massage was good because it would leave him speechless, though with his never-ending moaning it became apparent that it was intentional.

“Yeah, yeah, right there Tae.”

“That’s the spot.”

“Yeah, feels so good~”

“You always know how to hit the right spot, Tae. Such a good boy.” Jimin slurs, as Taehyung snapped back to reality. The pet name was known to be one of his favorites, though it seems like Jimin saying it made him realize his hyung’s intent.

“Stop trying to seduce me, hyung.” Taehyung grumbles as he nudges Jimin’s back as a warning before sitting back down to his spot.

“Ouch! Bad boy!” Jimin scolds as he holds his back before cracking the joints of his own neck.

“🎶Da naeda beolyeo good boys gone bad~🎶” Jungkook sings the tune of TXT’s Good Boy Gone Bad song, as you turn to his direction and sing along the line three more times before Taehyung drops the dice on the palm of your hand makes you stop singing.

“How come you love to sing the songs of other groups instead of ours.” Jimin pouts as he crosses his arms.

“Jungkook ah, are you really allowing this behavior?” Taehyung asks as Jungkook flashes them wide eyes.

“I mean… it’s a good song.” Jungkook answered truthfully as I nodded my head with exaggeration before I rolled the dice.

“They’re your juniors, you should support them.” You reminded them.

“We do support them, but we just want our girlfriend singing our own songs.” Taehyung huffs as you found their slight annoyance endearing.

“Yay!” You cheered as the dice landed on the face showing five dots.

“How lucky are you?!” Jungkook asks as you pass his pawn and land on a box.

“I told you. Jimin got in your head, so you’re all losing to me.” You state proudly.

“French kiss each player for 15 seconds!” Jimin says with a grin as he leans forward as if he was waiting for you to lean in and makeout with him any minute now though your eyes were still busy reading the board.

“Nice one dummy. It says ‘French kiss a player for 15 seconds.” You corrected and Jimin looked at you confused as he leaned back to straighten his posture.

“Would you really choose to kiss only one of us?” Jimin raised a brow. No, and all four of you knew that you couldn’t and wouldn’t choose between any of them even if you were forced to.

“Then we’ll really know who your favorite is.” Taehyung teased as you rolled your eyes.

You wanted to bite back with something sassy and you were sure that they also watched you expectedly for a quick-witted or laugh provoking response though you held yourself back and instead got on your hands and knees as you leaned towards the oldest of the bunch to kiss.

Jimin’s eyes showed how taken by surprise he was at your response. His straight back leaned back and his hands went to the floor to support himself from the unexpected action, though in a matter of seconds he eased into kissing your lips back. Your tongue quickly entered the cavern of his mouth as his tongue did little to fight back due to how much control you’ve gained in the time that took him to process that you were making out with him. You can tell he wanted some control back from the way his posture started to push against you, though as quickly as it began you pulled away and left him chasing your lips for more though you already sat back into position.

You turned to face Taehyung now as he pouted his lips and you leaned forward to kiss him too. Starting with a small peck that elicited a whine to leave throat before you pushed your weight against him and made him lean further onto the side of the mattress of his bed. Taehyung definitely played more passively when it came to making out. It was just how he was most of the time. He was soft and gentle. In simple terms, you would describe him as a man who likes to make love and not to fuck, and to you that was damn fine. However, since Taehyung doesn’t fight for control in a kiss like your other boyfriends, he makes up for the fact that he loves skinship especially when it comes to kissing.

You can feel his hand slightly placing pressure on your back to continue making out with him as the other hovered over the skin of your arm. Both weren’t explicit places though you knew that with enough time that they’d wander, and as soon as the hand on your back began moving higher to your neck, you cut off the kiss.

“Hey, how come his kiss is longer than mine?!” Jimin said as you two broke away and a certain flusteredness came to your face as you realized the two had been watching. You should be used to it now, but it was still second nature to you as if all of them hadn’t seen your most vulnerable parts, even doing it together at times.

“If you kiss Jungkook like how you did to me, then you won’t be leaving this room tonight.” Taehyung warned as you went over to Jungkook’s side now.

The youngest had parted his legs for you to crawl in between with a smirk on his face. You leaned in and kissed him as he parted his lips and a familiar war of your tongues fought. You were pushing your weight on him bringing a hand to his chest to support yourself, though you can feel his hands that were placed on the floor loosen to make a move for your body. You quickly took both your hands to hold his down at the same time your tongue won the battle and a groan elicited from his throat as you parted from his lips.

“Baby~” Jungkook whines and something in your heart tugs to keep kissing him though you risk the possibility of not getting sleep tonight and you can tell your body isn't up to that right now. Your eyes would practically fall asleep right now as the alcohol catches up to you and the three had way too much energy for you to catch up.

“Okay, that’s it. Goodnight boys.” You immediately stood up as their heads immediately followed you.

“Huh—? What? Wait…”

“We’re not done yet!” Taehyung says as he points to the board game.

“We can play another time. I’m really tired right now. It feels like I’m going to fall asleep any moment now. Plus, your practice…” You summarized your reasons as the boys frowned though replied with a synchronized ‘good nights’.

“And don’t stay up too late!” You warned with a double meaning as you heard their laughs from behind the door before you walked out the corridor.

That line really did feel like you were their mother, though in all seriousness you were just looking after them. It was a love language you developed after you learned to appreciate your eldest boyfriend’s care for you.

You walked past the kitchen and dining room as your eyes traveled past the dining table to see that the television was now turned off and the couch was empty. Hoseok had probably taken his leave for his and Jimin’s shared bedroom that was only a few steps from the living room.

You walked past the entrance corridor and onto a silent part of the dorm where Namjoon, Jin, and Yoongi’s room resides. You knew Namjoon was asleep though the light noise of a controller moving in Jin’s room and the subtle typing of a keyboard in Yoongi's room told you that your two eldest boyfriends were still awake.

You knocked lightly at Yoongi’s door and a slight breeze passed by you from the air conditioner in the hallway. A dawning realization set in on you as you realized you left Yoongi’s sweater in the boy’s bedroom and you feared that if you walked in now then you'd never come out.

“Come in.” Yoongi says as you pushed his door open softly and closed it behind you. He was on his desk with his laptop open, and a frown threatened your lips as you think that he was working even at such a late time in the dorm.

“Don’t worry, I’m not working. Just making a quick email for my mom.” He says as he turns on his chair to flash you a smile.

“What— I… How’d you know that I would ask that?” You stutter flusteredly from how well he knows you, and the fact that you remind him on a daily basis to take care of himself and to take some time from making music to live life and create stories to write about.

“Love, I know you. We all do. You’re always so caring and sweet. Always making sure that we don’t overwork ourselves.” Yoongi says whilst his eyes take their time to take in the sight of you. You subconsciously took the hem of your dolphin shorts to pull slightly down as if it would hide an inch more of your thighs.

Yoongi raises a brow and offers for you to sit on his lap with the tap of his hands. You huffed, though you still took steps to sit down on him. His black sweatpants and white oversized shirt smelled just like him with a slight hint of alcohol and nicotine.

“I’m not up to it right now, Yoongi. I just left your sweater at the boys’ room and if I enter their room again then I’d probably be wheeled into their dirty adult game again.” You turned to look at him with a pout as he let out a dry chuckle and brought a hand to pinch at your cheeks before planting a quick kiss on your lips.

“I know, love. I can feel that you’re tired, and that’s okay. Don’t let them push you into doing something you don’t want to—“

“What? No no, they weren't like that.” You defended the three as Yoongi nodded.

“I’m just saying… if one of us starts acting like a jerk towards you then there will still be six of us to come talk some sense into them.” Yoongi says as you giggled at that because in truth, none of them could ever be a jerk to you and all of you knew that. They loved and cared for you too much for that, and for as long as they do then they’ll never stoop down to treat you that way.

You leaned your body back to Yoongi’s chest as you sat in silence. Any other time and you would prefer to fill up the silence with some noise though you both prefered to bask in the love of silence. However, the sound of Jin’s gamer rage from beyond the concrete walls and you both chuckled at the oldest member’s incoherent mutterings.

“Now, which sweater did you say that you left in the boys’ room?” Yoongi raises a brow as you flash him a toothy grin.

“Uhm… actually, I think it was Jin’s sweater. I’ll go calm him down right now and tell him about it.” You stood up from his lap as he chuckled at you.

“It better not be my Fila sweater. I swear I haven’t seen it around anymore…”

“It’s not yours! I think it was Jin’s or maybe it's mine. I have my own sweaters too, you know.” You said as you awkwardly walked out the room with the sound of Yoongi’s chuckle being the last thing you heard before you closed the door.

You shook your head as you decided that you’ll eventually get that sweater when they all go to work in the morning. You walked to the door next to Yoongi as you heard another soft thud that sounded like a controller on a soft surface like Jin’s duvet.

You knock on Jin’s door as he hums for any one at the door to enter. You pushed the door to open and take in the darkness of the room that was only lit up by a warm lamp at Jin’s bedside table.

“Jin? Are you okay? What’s with all the noise?” You asked even though it was common knowledge that he often gets vocal when he plays and it has become a running joke around the dorm that whenever Jin loses a match of his games then he’d berate himself recklessly without actually taking anything he says to heart.

‘The Jin Mentality’ was what they coined it as. Similar to ‘Jimin today’ though Jin’s was actually a positive thing. Where you state all your wrong doings and berate yourself instead of hearing others berate you, but at the end of the day since you said all the words you can more freely choose to just not give a fuck about the things you said and deem it as bullcrap.

“Just gaming. You’ll sleep with me tonight?” Jin asks as he pauses his game and pats the duvet beside him as you close the door behind you and walk through his room to sit on the duvet.

“I’m sleeping here tonight.” You corrected as you laid your back down whilst your lower body hangs off the side of the bed.

Jin chuckles at your correction as he eyes you up and down before he returns to his games on the television mounted on the wall. He was seriously the only one of the members to install a TV in their room. A TV that came straight from his pocket though he considers it a big win since he’s the only one that can freely lay in bed and snuggle up to you whilst watching a movie, and it easily compresses any noise from his room considering how close the walls his rooms has with Yoongi and Namjoon.

“Did they tire you out today?” He asks in a more serious note though his eyes continue to flicker on the screen of the TV.

Despite the lack of eye contact and skinship Jin was giving you right now, you knew that his tone was one of sincerity and care. He was the one who had voiced out his worries for you in the beginning of the relationship. He was hesitant at first for this whole relationship to start considering they all somehow wanted your attention more than the other member’s and he was afraid that you’d overwork yourself in trying to be a lover to all of them. However, you quickly shut off his worries when you showed just how easily you blended into their schedules without overworking yourself too much. Though you would always notice how Jin typically doesn’t demand your affection as much when he realizes the others wanted your affection more, so that typically leads you to coming to him for affection as he mostly takes care of you rather than letting you take care of him or yourself.

“Maybe… Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook are playing this dirty adult game and I left my sweater inside their room.” You mutter as he nods and hums.

“You don’t have to—“

“I know, Yoongi keeps reminding me, but I actually really wanted to join.” You flashed him a toothy smile as you feel your eyes droop when he looks away from the screen to look down at you.

“You should sleep, sweetheart. I can see your eyes droop.” Jin says as he pauses the game and leans down to kiss you on the lips.

“You too…” You slur as you bring your legs into the bed to properly lie down on the pillows and under the duvet with the help of Jin to tuck you in.

“I’ll sleep once I’m done with this level. I’m not that tired yet anyways.” Jin says as he pecks your cheek with another kiss and brings the duvet over your shoulders just how you preferred it especially because his air conditioner faced towards his bed.

You blinked your eyes once more and shifted to see that Jin had magically teleported beside you with a knitted sweater that you knew was the color light blue with a white whale in front since he always lets you borrow it when you sleep in his room. Somehow the knitted yarn keeps you warmer than any other cotton sweater under his duvet.

You sat up and put on the sweater as the extra material gathered on your waist because you didn’t have the energy to properly pull the oversized fit over to cover your thighs. You smile at your sweater paw as Jin watches you with endearment. You open your arms as he leans in to kiss you once more before he pats your hair and whispers a goodnight. You smiled at him and scooted over to the side of the bed where it was pressed to the corner of the bedroom wall. Jin always made sure you slept on that side with the claim that he didn’t want you falling off though you suspected that he just didn’t want you escaping his room in the middle of the night without his acknowledgment.

You woke in the middle of the night, from a look out the curtains it seems as though it was still late at night though with a glance at Jin’s bedside table alarm clock, you knew that it was nearing two in the morning and Jin was still playing his game.

“Jin?” You asked groggily as Jin turned to look down at you.

“Sorry sweetheart, did I wake you up?” He asked though your eyes only flickered from his face to the alarm clock.

“Why aren’t you sleeping yet?” You asked as you held yourself up by your elbows to wake you up more though the sleepiness still loomed over you.

“Ah, shit. I lost track of time.” Jin muttered to himself as he glanced at the time. He exits the game and grabs the remote to turn off the TV as you watched on with a pout on your lips. He was definitely going to wake up with not enough sleep for tomorrow and you partly blamed yourself for not bringing him to sleep when you were going to.

“Jin~ I don’t like it when you don’t sleep on time.” You whined as Jin’s lips twitched to a prideful smile, though he only tucks himself beside you as he engulfs you in a hug.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, you know I don’t mean to. I promise I’ll sleep better tomorrow.” He kissed your forehead as you huffed and turned your back to him though you still snuggled your back to him. His body spooned you as his hands reached under the sweater he gave you. His cold hands settled to play with your boobs through your shirt though it wasn’t sexual.

You found it as his way to get just a little closer to you when you were sleeping. It was his way of showing you affection until the very moment you close your eyes. His hands would occasionally squeeze your mounds like a massage that would elicit a moan from you though you trusted him enough to not make it go further than that.

You woke up from a small streak of light that slipped past the curtains. Jin’s hold on you was looser now and he was lightly snoring as you let both your eyes take in your surroundings before you detached from Jin and sat up. You silently crawled out of bed by squeezing out the foot of the bed since you didn’t want to wake Jin up from his sleep. He needed to get as much rest as he could before his alarm would ring half past seven in the morning and currently he still had thirty minutes of rest to savor.

Before you walked out of the room, you quickly unplugged his gaming station. You figured that Jin had forgotten to turn it off last night and you didn’t want it to overheat. You then walked out the room and silently let your feet walk through the marble tiles of the apartment before you reached the kitchen to see both Hoseok and Namjoon conversing. Namjoon sat on the dining table with a cup of coffee as Hoseok seemed to be busy making his own cup of espresso with the coffee machine.

“Good morning,” You greeted with a yawn as both their heads turned to see you walk into the open layout room.

“Good morning beautiful,”

“Good morning, princess,”

They greeted in chorus as you stopped behind Namjoon’s chair to greet him with a morning kiss on the lips to which he smiled at before you walked behind the kitchen island.

“How did you sleep? I heard the boys were having some fun last night.” Namjoon asks as he watches you greet Hoseok with a kiss on the lips too.

“I only stopped by for a moment. I was too tired from the alcohol and celebrating last night.” You said as you eyed Hobi making a glass of his iced americano coffee. You can see Namjoon nod as he sips his own coffee and eyes the hallway towards his, Yoongi’s, and Jin’s rooms.

“You can have this one, beauty. I’ll make another one for myself.” Hoseok says though you shook your head.

“It’s okay, Hobi. I’m gonna go cook some breakfast for you guys first.” You smile as the man smiles brightly and leans to kiss you on the forehead before he moves to the side of the island to not get in your way.

“You don’t have to, you know. We can just order or call the staff.” Hoseok says though you only shake your head as you eye the contents of the fridge and opted to use some leftover rice to make some Kimchi Fried Rice.

You took out a container of Kimchi that Taehyung’s mother had sent for the boys to share and a tupperware of leftover rice that had been from last night��s celebrations. You also opened up the freezer to find frozen bacon that would be the perfect protein to their diet with added eggs. You placed your ingredients onto the counter before you reached up on your tippy toes to reach the cabinet with the frying pan you loved to use.

“Why do you always love to use this and not the one on the bottom cabinet?” Namjoon says right behind your ear as his hands sneak up to support your waist whilst the other reaches for the pan to get for you.

“My gosh, you scared me.” You said as you turned around and Namjoon smirks down at you before he places the frying pan on the induction stove on the island to heat up for you. You threw a playful slap at his bicep as you stood in front of the stove to pour some oil onto it.

Namjoon’s little playful act of always trying to scare you was one that you could never get used to and to be quite honest, it made you even more flustered at how Hobi had laughed at your shocked face before he continued to sip on his Americano with a bent back on the kitchen island.

“I like using it because it's my favorite color, obviously.” You roll your eyes as you feel Namjoon hover behind your back as Hobi tilts his head at you. He places his Iced Americano down and walks off somewhere behind you though your flustered state had made you keep your eyes at slicing the bacon into smaller pieces.

“Someone as sassy as you shouldn’t forget to bring simple seasonings when cooking.” Hobi says with a teasing voice as he places bottles of salt, pepper, and sesame oil beside you before he leans on the counter.

“Don’t stress her Hobi. Our tired princess didn’t even have fun with the maknaes last night because she was too tired.” Namjoon’s sultry voice speaks with a hint of seductiveness as he says the English syllables of ‘tired’ slowly from behind your ear whilst his hands rest on your waist.

A chill running up from your spine as you focused your eyes on cutting the bacon. Only once you were done with cutting the bacon did you realize that the two men had you trapped with the only escape being walking past the counter that had a sizzling stove.

“Guys…” You try to stop them though Namjoon’s voice has interrupted yours.

“We’re not guys.” He turns your body with an equal amount of force yet carefulness, as Hoseok moves the cutting board with a knife further from the edge of the counter before Namjoon pins you against the marble.

Namjoon’s lips were immediately on yours as your tongues fought in the midst of saliva. Then Namjoon had redirected your body to lean against Hoseoks as the man's hands took you by surprise and gave Namjoon access to your mouth.

“She’s so pretty in between us.” Hoseok huskily says to Namjoon as if you couldn’t hear his voice from being sandwiched in between them.

Namjoon pulls away from the kiss as you make an effort to breathe and compose yourself though Hoseok’s lips didn’t give you enough time as he quickly replaces Namjoon’s lips with his hands directing your neck to press against him. You can feel Namjoon's hand reach from under your sweater to travel under your shirt. His soft large hands caressing your body as he leans down to plant kisses on your neck.

“The stove–” You say as soon as Hoseok’s lips pull away from yours and all your faces turn towards the frying pan that was cooking up nothing but hot oil before a chuckle escapes from the dining room.

“Took you long enough. I thought I’d be the one to break up your makeout session just so that the dorm doesn’t burn down.” Yoongi’s chuckle reverberated through the dorm as Namjoon and Hoseok chuckled before withdrawing every bit of affection they had on you just seconds prior. Their vulgar actions caused a pit to nag at your stomach and a neediness for their lips to hide your now puffy ones.

“Good morning, Yoongi.” Namjoon and Hoseok greeted as they both went back to drink their coffees at the dining table whilst Yoongi came over to peck your cheek as a greeting.

He looks over the ingredients you had laid out before he quickly places your sliced bacon onto the pan to silence the boiling of oil. The chatter of Namjoon and Hoseok at the dining area was enough of a distraction for you to compose yourself from the makeout session and go back into cooking without another word as Yoongi chuckles.

“They're such big teases aren’t they?” Yoongi laughs as the blush on your cheeks doesn't stop you from nodding in agreement.

“Let me help you cook. You’re preparing Kimchi Fried Rice, aren’t you?” Yoongi clarified as you also nodded and he let out a laugh again at how you were struck wordless at such events in the early morning. Nevertheless, he helps you cook as you start to open up more from your flustered state.

[Back to the Present]

God, you weren’t going to cry again. Not when you felt as though you were juiced like a lemon from how dehydrated you were from secreting so much tears from your eyes.

You tried to breathe properly as Jimin sent you a text that they were already heading home thirty minutes ago, though by now you were used to them getting home an hour after they say so.

So here you were distracting yourself from your thoughts by cooking some Dak Kalguksu. From the texts in the groupchat, they seemed to keep good spirits throughout the day since Taehyung and Jungkook couldn’t shut up while hinting at some good news during their lunch break.

It broke you to know that this rare good mood would turn sour because of you. Because now, you were the one that can’t give them the love and affection you wanted to give, and you weren’t ready to receive love and affection in your current mental state.

Their voices rang through the hallway fifteen minutes earlier than you expected and from the sound of it, it sounded more calm as Jimin and Hoseok’s voice talking about new shoes were the ones that captured your ears first while they were leaving their shoes at the entrance corridor.

“Baby, we’re home! And no ones figh—“ Jungkook’s proud voice quieted as he sees your beige white suitcase, the one they had gifted you before bringing you to their trip to Japan a few months ago, at the end of the corridor.

“You brought some stuff over?” Jimin asks as he and Taehyung eye the luggage wearily before pushing past Jungkook to run to the living room and sit on the sofa with a relaxed sigh.

You looked away from the boiling broth cooking on the induction stove as you found a lid to cover your dish. It was just about to finish cooking. You just needed to make the Yangnyeomjang sauce that you knew Yoongi and Namjoon loved to add to their chicken though it seemed like you ran out of time. They would have to make their own later.

You looked up to see Jungkook cautiously eyeing your suitcase as Hoseok pushes him to sit down at the dining table with a laugh though a look that asks you the purpose of the suitcase getting brought out. Even Namjoon asks you of its contents as Jin just raises a brow at it, though seemed less bothered by its presence. Yoongi on the other hand just walked past it and took off his beanie to place on the dining table before he walked to the kitchen behind you to grab some water to drink.

They were still tired and it showed on their expressions, and what you hated even more was that the dorm wasn't even filled with arguing to help burn the fire that pushes you to answer their questions. All that could be heard was Jimin and Taehyung silently bickering on who would get the remote as the rest of your boyfriends sit on the dining table with little words to say to each other.

You cleared your throat and made your way to the other side of the counter where you could overlook the living room and dining room. Okay, this is it.

“I’ve been thinking about this since last night, and I— I hope you could hear me out fully…” You started, though the first part of your statement seemed to go unheard as Jin nodded and seemed to remember something.

“Ah, yeah! Right! I wanted to apologize to all of you about last night. I was being stupid and was just so tired that I wasn’t thinking properly.” Jin says quickly as Yoongi shuts the fridge door and sips on his glass of water on the counter behind you.

“We’re all stupid. We’re getting stupider each night with how exhausted we are when we come home.” Yoongi said as all of them seemed to hum in agreement. At least they’re self aware? Back to your poi—

“Oh baby! We also have some great news to te—“ Taehyung says excitedly as he stands up from the couch and lets Jimin take control of the remote with little to fight because of his excitement, though you really just wanted to rip off the bandaid and tell them your firm decision right now.

“I need a break.” You say loud enough for it to echo around the dorm, or perhaps your words had taken the men in such surprise that their brain had to replay it multiple times to understand it.

You closed your eyes and breathed out as you readied the words that were about to spill from your lips. Everything you had been feeling and how you were initially alright and capable of loving them despite these challenges spilled out of your lips with nothing stopping them.

You told them how through more nights, you were starting to lose yourself in the arguments and how last night you had made up your decision to take a break from them just for a little while. That your mental health needed this and that you would be staying in the provinces with aunt and uncle. That despite your love for them making you want to continue on in withstanding all their arguments, your mind can’t keep up and you need to be wholly ready to be able to give your all in supporting them.

Whatever your monologue was about made the boys scoff, though your voice stayed strong despite the sniffle that you heard Jimin make from the sofa.

“What?” Namjoon says as you look up to see their faces red yet not a single tear has fallen. Somehow that made you relieved. Perhaps they had understood your explanation and agreed with you.

“You’re running away because you can't keep up with our schedules?” Namjoon asks as the table erupts into different voices and opinions, even Taehyung and Jimin walk to the dining room to tell their own account of what they understood from what you said.

“No, Namjoon ah, she said she’s just not mentally well to handle us—“

“Mental health doesn’t excuse you from running away from us!”

“You can’t dump us just when we’re meant to stay focused for our comeback.”

“Hyung, she said break… not a break up right?”

“There’s a difference?”

“You’re leaving us?”

All this noise. Their voices had gotten so loud over each other that you couldn’t even hear your own head to try and get them on the same page.

It was just like every other night. Everyone never saw the same page and that’s how each and every one of your arguments started. No one was learning, no one was understanding, and it just proves that this environment wasn’t the place for you to get yourself back together.

So you left.

You left like a coward. You didn’t make an effort to bring them to the same page, and you didn’t make the effort to explain yourself clearer. You took off without another word with your luggage and everyone was too busy arguing about what you had said to even realize that you had left.

You left them, and you didn’t even know if they would understand that you still wanted to come back. You just needed to fix yourself, but now it felt as though you had broken up.

The boys never talked about what you said after that night. Perhaps they were still silently wishing that everything they heard was wrong and that you really were just taking a one or two day break without communication, or maybe they were too tired and busy to mention it.

They never mentioned how the dorm was silent whenever they got home. They never mentioned that the humming of your voice and the smell of your cooking weren’t there to greet their tired souls anymore. They never mentioned the fact that they knew that they needed to order dinner on the way home because they were silently praying that you were there cooking them a hot home cooked meal.

They never mentioned how your clothes and belongings seemed to disappear from their rooms. How your chargers disappeared from their place beside theirs. How the shirts you stole from them randomly appeared back to their wardrobes freshly washed and void of your smell. How all your skincare and haircare products disappeared from all their bathrooms, and the fact that they didn’t need to call a cleaner as often because your hair didn’t litter the floor after you would be done combing.

They didn’t mention any of it because they hoped you would stick to your words of a ‘break’ though now they were really beginning to question whether or not they heard ‘break’ or ‘break up’.

All of this was kept to rot in their minds until the last week they had in Seoul before their promotions. You would think they would be busier than they already were, but their management actually reverses psychology by busying the boys more in the last month before promotions and then cleaning up their schedules a week before to let them rest and let their anticipation build. It helps keep them excited for promotions rather than overworked.

This was what Taehyung had wanted to tell you about. They wanted to tell you how they were planning on taking you out on a date night before they went abroad to celebrate your birthday early… Now he wonders if they would’ve understood you better if he hadn’t interrupted you enough to make you interrupt him.

“Can we talk? Like all of us actually talk.” Namjoon says as they all sit blankly on the living room sofa whilst their eyes glaze over the show on the television.

“Yeah, I think it’s about time.” Jin says as each of them sat up straighter. Jungkook took the remote and lowered the TV to the volume close to mute as they all faced each other, yet avoided eye contact.

“So, about what Y/N said… let’s all say what we actually heard from her.” Namjoon took the leadership role as everyone nodded and he turned to Jin to start off.

“I was actually really excited when Taehyung wanted to tell her about our surprise that the first few things she said had gone over me.” Jin clarifies as everyone nods in understanding and stays silent to let him continue.

“But from what I heard, she said she needed some time off to get mentally better. I didn’t actually hear anything about what made her mentally break to the point of the situation getting like this, but yeah.” Jin explains as Taehyung furrows his brow to say something though refrains from doing it to avoid any altercation. They were going to have to listen to each other to get this shit fixed.

“She didn’t say what made her need a mental break, but she definitely hinted at the fact that we weren’t making a good environment for her to get better in any way.” Yoongi spoke up as he took it that it was his turn to speak since he was the second eldest.

“I didn’t hear a lot. It was kinda like what Jin said. Except I was so shocked by what she said that her words made sense when you heard them, but never actually processed in my brain. I’m sorry, guys.” Hoseok said as the six of them all nodded. They couldn’t blame Hobi, not when they all seemed to have some sort of dementia from that night. Their brains only process what happened before and after then turning into a mess when they try to recall the during.

“Before our busy schedules started, I talked with her about our schedule. I always did when I knew things would get busier and we couldn't give her 100%, just to give her a heads up to prepare and be aware. So when she said she needed some time away from us, I immediately jumped to the conclusion that she was running away from us. I already warned her for all of this and it wasn’t like this was the first time she had been with us after such tremendous work, so I thought she finally had enough of us and that this break was actually a break up.” Namjoon stops as his eyes never leave from gazing coldly at the edge of their coffee table.

Everyone was silent. Namjoon’s words always silences them. They were so filled with wisdom and thoughts with meanings beyond understanding that they really do place the effort to listen when it counts. However, none of their eyes could meet each other as they all formulated their own conclusion to what Namjoon was trying to say.

“Now that I think back on it… We were very much in the wrong. All of us. She asked us to listen to her for one last time and we should have taken that chance to properly hear her out and have a proper discussion on what we could do to make her stay… Instead we fought again. We did the thing that she claimed has made this environment with us so hostile that she can’t be mentally well in it.” Namjoon sighs as he feels tears prick at his eyes and all the members come to a silent understanding of everything Namjoon said.

For once in the past few weeks, they had finally silently agreed on the meaning of something, yet it didn’t feel relieving or accomplishing. It felt colder to know that they had done it too late.

“Can’t we still talk to her right now? Beg for her to come back and have a proper discussion with us?” Jimin pipes up as his face looks completely wrecked after the few moments of silence that they took to understand Namjoon’s words. Tear stains littered his cheeks and his voice didn’t seem like it was far from breaking out into a sob, yet he still mustered up the strength to speak his only idea.

“Has anyone texted her after that night?” Namjoon asks as everyone looks up to see if anyone raises a hand, though their hearts plummet to their stomach when no one does.

Everyone had been too pussy to text you. They all thought the other would do it and somehow bring you back to the apartment by themselves, though their reliance had now been their downfall. They were now angered. Angered at themselves for not making the move sooner. It had been two weeks and yet no one made the effort to contact you.

“Fuck, no one?” Yoongi says as he meets each and everyone’s eyes as they all told no.

“Fuck.” Hoseok mutters as he takes a throw pillow and hugs it to his chest before he leans back on the sofa to now point his gaze at the ceiling.

“Shit, do you think she thinks we just let her go so easily? Like we didn’t even text her as an effort to get her back? We just let her sneak out whilst we were arguing about what she sai—“ Taehyung’s rambling was interrupted by his own voice cracking and Jimin patting his back as the man himself looked like he was holding himself back.

“I’m angry. I’m angry at us for not even trying to text her. I’m angry at myself for thinking one of you had texted her already.” Jimin says as he finishes comforting Taehyung to now wrap his knees with his arms in a way to comfort himself.

“It’s not too late…” Jungkook suggests, though the silence that followed the reluctance they all had.

They were desperate to bring you back, but at the same time, you had asked for space and texting you so late into the break seemed like it was a brewing mistake. However, shouldn’t they try to fix their past mistakes by contacting you and showing just how stupid they had been.

“I know what you’re all thinking. You’re thinking that we’re too late. That she had probably made up her mind already about the break up because none of us went to immediately call her, but shouldn’t we at least try?” A tear slips past Jungkook’s eyes as his voice grows weaker, yet he pushes words out his vocal cords.

“Don’t we love her? Isn’t she worth fighting for?” Jungkook buries his head into the throw pillow he cuddled on the carpeted floor as he breaks into sobs that Jimin tried to comfort him out of.

But the youngest of them did speak the most fact. They loved you to uncountable amounts, so you are more than worth fighting for. They just didn’t know if they could still fight for you when they were two weeks late from the battle.

The boys all ate their dinner in numbing peace that night. Not a single argument or tease wanted to roll off their tongue, instead they were just talking. Talking about anything and everything, but the fact that they were missing their eight soulmates, their eighth piece to the puzzle of their small family.

It felt nostalgic watching each other play on the gaming stations they haven’t used in a month. It felt weird to dust off the balcony to sit on the patio chairs that were last used by you and Namjoon. It felt bone crushing when Jungkook went to his cupboard of board games to find something they could play, only to find their game of a sexy adult game on the top of the pile.

They weren’t blind and they all knew something was missing. There was this unmistakable silence when they spoke to each other, a missing note when they laughed together, a missing pair of feet padding around the house.

Jin tried his best to not show how these little subtle things got to him. The fact that there were nights where he gamed way too late despite their schedule because he lost track of time again and had somewhat relied on you to remind him that he needs sleep again. He also ignored the fact that he was currently gaming on the console in their living room instead of the one in his own room because it had overheated after he forgot to unplug it for a whole night. He thought someone else would’ve unplugged it for him, but then again you were the only one who unplugged it for him. These nights he finds himself slowly inching closer to the wall as he sleeps. He finds that the smell of your shampoo on that side of the bed is the only thing that can put him to sleep after a rough gaming session.

Yoongi on the other hand was the opposite to Jin. He could even say that he hasn’t thought about you much, due to the fact that he had been overworking himself restless these past few days. He figured that since he doesn’t have to greet you at the dorm then he could stay at his studio just a little longer and come home with his files in a laptop to continue working at. It was better this way, he would say. He avoided any arguments when they got home, and he kept his mind off you by doing the things that you had countlessly reminded him not to do. Despite managers even telling him to get some rest. He would never listen, and they knew that he wouldn’t listen because he only ever listened to you.

Hoseok, in the meantime had his whole sleeping schedule fucked up and everyone could see how badly it affects him on the daily. He missed how he would elicit a groan from you when he asked you if you’d join him for a morning jog, though somehow you’d still force yourself to get ready in less than five minutes. He missed the way you would let your boisterous laugh out when you were with him. He missed the way you would point at everything and anything when you jogged or went on hikes. He missed you so much that you were the only thing on his mind. The image of your face permanently embedded in his mind, to the point that there’d be times where he’d see you in the reflection of the mirror in their dance studio. He missed you so much in fact that he would enter the dance studio with only half his mind and the boys grew even more worried when they would mess up and Hoseok wouldn’t even bat an eyelash at them. It was as if he turned blind and void. He didn’t care if they were being sloppy with the choreography, as long as he did his moves with effort then it was up to the other choreographers and staff to berate the others on their mistakes.

Jimin, in the meantime, was a complete mess. The others would agree that he was the reason the staff had actually connected the dots of the fact that they were dumped, because Jimin had never looked as swollen as he did the first three days you left them. His low performance during dance practice even made choreographers turn the other way as they knew he was hurting though prefered to say their corrections softly so as to not hurt him more. He looks like he hasn’t gotten any rest and Hoseok knows that he hasn’t because he could still hear him tossing and turning on his bed when he would randomly wake up in the middle of the night. Jimin always had trouble sleeping. It was something that you couldn’t even fix, yet you always helped by taking out all his remaining energy or making him some tea, even the simple action of running your nails on his scalp helped soothe him to sleep. Now the problem had turned ten times worse when you weren’t here to ease him, yet you filled his mind and kept him void from closing his eyes for too long that he might think his vision of you was reality.

Taehyung was similar to his 1995 counterpart. However, his professionalism came on top and he would never even let a glimpse of his sadness show when he was in the HYBE building. It may seem like a good thing, but it really wasn’t far off as he would coop up all his sad thoughts about you until the end of the day where he’d stuff his face with every possible thing in the fridge to keep himself from sobbing, though it never worked. It never worked for when his grandma died or when they were all having a hard time during 2018, so it wasn’t going to start randomly working now. The food he ate could only suppress half of the pain he had inside. He missed you and your soft hair. He missed the way your fingers played with his locks and how he would return the favor by running his own fingers through your soft hair. The smell of your shampoo filling his senses as you would let him style your hair in any braid he had learned to do on youtube. The black hair tie he bought specifically to style your hair still tightly around his wrist. Waiting for you to come back as he finally learned how to do a Dutch braid this time around.

Jungkook, alternatively, seemed to be the least affected member of them all. He went along with his day fine. He joked with staff whenever the others seemed too busy in their heads during a meeting, and he acted oblivious to everything happening. He doesn’t spend much time at the apartment either for his hyungs to gauge how he truly was reacting to the situation. He started getting out more frequently. Some staff members even see him at the other side of Seoul, and when they would ask why he was there then he’d just shrug his shoulders and touch his mask. He’d take a look at his surroundings in case someone noticed that he was the Jungkook and then he would continue on his way. He would spend more time at the Hannam The Hill gym. He started going to more parks, malls, restaurants, and hidden gems in Seoul because he couldn’t bear staying at the dorm, not when you had practically lived and touched every surface of it too. He couldn’t bear seeing everyone upset, so he chose to distract himself with exploration. Perhaps in a different universe he was actually taking you there, he might’ve taken all eight of you there. Maybe, just maybe.

Namjoon wasn’t blind. He saw all of them suffer. He wasn’t blind to how he had suffered either. His lyrics turned more and more angsty as the days went by, and a longing to vent everything to someone weighed on his chest though it felt as though the seven people could vent to were also feeling the same problems.

Namjoon would get up in the middle of the night and walk near every bedroom door in the house. He knew when Jin was still up gaming when it was already two in the morning. He knew when Yoongi was still working on his laptop when he just came home from an extended three hours at his studio. He knew when Hoseok had woken up from a nightmare because of a small gasp that would sound from his and Jimin’s shared room. He also knew how Jimin barely slept because he would toss and turn every few minutes under his duvet. He knew when Taehyung would sneak out of his and Jungkook’s shared room to get a whole bucket of ice cream from the refrigerator freezer, and he knew when Jungkook would silently sneak back into their dorm after taking a mysterious late night walk.

Namjoon knew all of this was happening and yet he didn’t do anything to stop them because he thought this was what they deserved. They deserved this for neglecting you. They deserved to miss you, so that when they beg for you to come back then they would have surely learned their lesson.

“Good night guys, let’s all send a text to her tomorrow afternoon after our short schedule.” Jin says as all of them seemed a little more at ease when they retreated to their bedrooms that night.

Namjoon didn’t hear Jin play his games, Yoongi made his music, Hoseok’s gasp from a nightmare, Jimin tossing or turning, Taehyung sneaking into the kitchen, or Jungkook sneaking in and out. The dorm was entirely silent and peaceful for the first time in a long time.

Though Namjoon’s eyes stayed on one thing… his phone.

He shouldn’t break a plan, but he thought that they all had learned their lessons. What if they all get their hopes up only to call their eighth lover to tell them that they have been officially over for all this time.

He couldn’t bear to see everyone’s hearts officially shatter. He needed an answer now, so that he could at least get himself together by tomorrow in the case that they do get rejected and one of them needs to stay emotionally sober.

[1:27] Namjoon: Hey…

[1:28] Namjoon: I know it’s late, literally and figuratively.

[1:30] Namjoon: We really miss you. It’s been 2 weeks and we’ll spend our last week in Seoul with more time in our schedules. I don’t think we can go do promotions in America if we can’t get on the same page as you.

[1:32] Namjoon: I don’t think I can handle America without you. I don’t even care about management anymore. I just need you, and I would give anything to at least let all of us meet just for a moment to talk.

[1:33] Namjoon: I hope you’re doing well.

[1:34] Namjoon: You have your sleeping schedule fixed!! If the reason you’re not reading this is because you’re resting right now.

[1:35] Namjoon: We love you, princess. We miss you.

[1:37] Namjoon: Text me back when you can?

[1:40] Namjoon: Sleep well

Namjoon sighs. His eyes were starting to hurt and he couldn’t figure out if it was because of his tiredness, intense focus on his phone screen while the lights were off, or if it was from the sting that threatened tears. Whatever it may be, he avoids thinking about it by imagining you. Wherever you may be. Perhaps they should even go to your apartment, though what if you get even more angry? You did say that you needed a break from them.

It was now the afternoon of the next day. The boys had all been driven back to their dorm after dropping by the HYBE building to only get a printed file of their schedule in America.

They all seemed more at peace today. Their car rides felt more restful, though an underlying nervousness crept on its seams. They had all planned to send private messages to you by the afternoon. They knew your schedule, and they could only hope that it hadn’t changed from the last time you told them it changed.

They all sat in the living room as they all took out their phones and formulated what they should say. They were making sure to keep it personal to each of them, not too long, not too short, not emotional, yet not robotic. They needed to let you feel that they missed you without it coming across as overbearing. They wanted you to feel just how much they had learnt from their mistakes. They wanted to meet you even for just a moment.

Jimin thinks that a single glimpse at you could fix everything. It would fix and heal all of them like a drop of magical medicine.

So they all formulated for an hour, as a drama played on the TV despite no one listening to it. They all came together and made sure to say the right things before sending it all at different times. They weren’t stupid. They won’t send it all at the same time. They’ll send it in different minutes, because that’s logical.

[14:21] Seokjin: Good afternoon, sweetheart. How have you been? I hope you’re doing well. I hope you’re getting enough rest. It’s almost your birthday soon, and I actually had something planned for it since we would spend it in the states but I don’t know if that’s possible now. I want you to know that I’ll always be here waiting for you. Take as much time as you need, but when things get rough then don’t be afraid to call me or any of us. I love you, sweetheart. Don’t forget to eat well and drink lots of water. Take care!

[14:22] Yoongi: I’m gonna skip the bullshit. I know you have seven more messages to go and read, and honestly we’re all in the living room formulating our messages. This is the first time in weeks that we actually came together to work on something other than choreo and music. It’s damn impressive what our love for you makes us do. We need you back, love. Everyone is miserable without you. Even Hobi has gone to shits. You know I hate talking about other people or what you call it as ‘tea’, but I think this is something I would actually ‘spill’ to you about. Just come home. Come back to us. We miss you and will always love you. No matter what. If you need any help mentally, emotionally, or physically. We are just one call away, so please don’t be afraid. Don’t run away.

[14:23] Hoseok: Hey beautiful… stuff isn't too good right now hahahaha. I miss you by my side. I haven’t been jogging lately and you know how my ankles get when the only movement they do is intense dancing and walking. I need my jogging partner back, or if you don’t want to jog then we don’t have to. I just need someone to annoy, early in the morning. Jungkookie isn’t reciprocating my love of annoying him either. I think he’s been going to the gym more often because his muscles are definitely stronger than they were two weeks ago, so it’s kinda scary annoying him in the morning when his biceps alone could send my head swinging. The dorm has been unbearably clean too. No one’s making a mess like you do, so I have no one to berate. I can’t believe I’m saying this right now, but I miss your loose hair strands littering our shiny floor. I just realized that it definitely made the dorm a home instead of a shiny marble tiled showroom. God, I miss you. Just stay safe and I love you. Text us back whenever you can.

From: Your Hope

To: My Hope

“Namjoon hyung, it’s your turn.” Jimin says as the six of them look towards their leader though he only lets out a meek smile.

“I already sent her a few messages last night.” Namjoon smiles as the boys look at him with shocked faces.

“What?! Without us?!” Jungkook says.

“I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t sleep if I didn’t send it right then.” Namjoon shrugs as everyone understands and even thought that it could make the chances of you responding better.

[14:25] Jimin: Hi babyy, miss you. I know how you should always put yourself first, so I’m not going to ask you to come back. Not when you feel ready to get totally pampered by all of us. When you come back I’m going to kiss you everywhere that you’d probably have to detain me to keep me off you. We haven’t even finished our game yet. Let’s play again sometime soon okay? And my gosh, there is so much gossip you’re missing out on right now. Text me back when you get this ‘cause I need to vent all the info I learned from one of our new makeup noonas. Stay well and take care! Love you mwah mwah! Gossip soon!

[14:26] Taehyung: Babyyyy! Did you know the HYBE cafeteria was selling your favorite meal last week?! It was perfectly cooked and seasoned, I swear! I’ll tell them to serve it again soon so that we can both judge whether it's better than the place that we usually get it from. Speaking of which, I heard our favorite frozen yogurt place had opened a branch near Hyochang Park, so we should definitely give it a look soon! Have you been following the fashion trends still? There’s this ridiculous trend on pants that I’ve been seeing and both me and Hoseok have agreed that it sucks, but we’re still wondering what your thoughts are on it. It sucks when we don’t have your opinion to help us see more than what we see in our funnel vision. We really really miss you. I love you. Don’t get sick and try to get back to us when you see this!

[14:26] Jungkook: BABBBBYYYY!!! HOW HAVE YOU BEEN??? I MISSED YOUU, WE MISSED YOU! Yoongi hyung said that we needed to make our messages deep and meaningful, but really I just want to say one thing and it’s that we’re sorry. We really are. And I know Jin hyung specifically told us to not beg for you back because you needed time and space to yourself, but please come back. It hurts when you’re not here, and no matter what I do it doesn’t go away. Let me take you somewhere when you get back. I know a place where you can scream out all your frustrations and feelings so that you can feel better mentally. I know a place Taehyung hyung had been eyeing for a while, maybe we should go there together. It’s some frozen yogurt place that I know you both love and it’s near Hyochang Park and a hidden attraction of Seoul that I heard from Mingyu. We’ve gotten better too! Less arguments when we can all agree that everyone just misses you. It’s kinda funny cause if I can replay one moment in my life then it would be that night. I should have listened to you rather than arguing with my hyungs. I should have listened with both my ears fully tuned to you because now we’re all in this stuck and confused area where we don’t know whether or not we’re on a break or we broke up. Like that’s something so important to know, but we’re not even sure what we are to you, and we were too scared to even message you immediately after. We don’t even know if you got home safe that night, and it hurts me to know that we’ve been neglecting you like this for so long. You’ve been with us through multiple comebacks and you’ve taken it all with no complaint until now. Please, don’t break up with me— with us. Just come back. Come home, please? We know where we went wrong now. It hurts and I don’t think it’ll get better unless you’re here with me— with us.

After they all sent their messages they had opted to watch a movie together, whilst all their phones laid face up with their volumes on high in case you’d respond to one of them. However, as the day got later and staff came knocking to deliver their dinner, no messages from you came through to any of their phones. And when everyone had gone to prepare dinner, Namjoon took a look at his phone to see that even his messages from last night hadn’t been sent.

Had you blocked them? Or changed your number entirely? Shit, he really doesn’t want all of them to come over to your place to beg you and get into your personal space, but if you had blocked them they’d have no choice.

“Guys, did your messages even get sent? Mine aren’t going through to her for some reason. Did she block me?” Namjoon asked and the boys never missed the dejection in his voice when he said the possibility of getting blocked by you.

Hoseok, Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook left from helping set up the table as they went to retrieve their phone from the coffee table to open and see their messages.

“Yeah, mine didn’t send either. It just bounced back.” Hoseok says as the maknae line quickly enters their passcodes to see it for themselves, each of their faces saying the same thing.

“Did she block us?”

“She wouldn't, right?”

“She wouldn’t have blocked us if she didn’t properly break up with us.” They all said synchronously as Jin and Yoongi looked up to see the commotion and sent a look towards each other.

“No, you know she doesn’t do blocking shit.” Yoongi cuts in to defend your name as Jin clears his throat. The look they sent each other was to defend you, though he prefered explaining it rather than swearing it on their faces. They were at more peace with each other than they had been for a few months and the reason you needed a break was because of the countless arguments they had, and the negative environment they created. It was counterintuitive to argue over you, when the reason you left was because of arguing.

“What Yoongi meant to say was that we all know that she wouldn’t block us. Remember when that friend of hers had said multiple bad things behind her back and we told her to block them, but her sweet soul just couldn’t? She sees it as ‘rude’, so the fact that you guys are accusing her of blocking you means that you think she’s rude. Do you think she’s rude?” Jin asks and the room falls silent as everybody knew you wouldn’t block anyone no matter what they did to you.

“Besides, she needed a break not a break up. You don’t block people when you’re on a break.” Yoongi adds.

“What if she did break up with us and we just didn’t understand her properly.” Jungkook says as his eyes seem lost in his own mind.

“Or she’s slowly easing us into a break up… like she knows it’ll hurt us if she did so suddenly then maybe after a few weeks of this break she breaks up with us?” Taehyung speaks out as the room stays silent.

Everyone wanted to defend you. They wanted to tell Taehyung that he was wrong and that you loved them too much, though they were out of proof to tell him otherwise.

Hoseok sighs as he eyes the table that had been set up with takeout food the staff had brought for them. “Let’s just eat. Maybe she’s just somewhere without signal or internet today.” Hoseok says as he was the first to walk to the dining room table with Jin and Yoongi.

“Yeah… or maybe her phone broke.” Namjoon follows as the maknae line glances at their phone before leaving theirs on the coffee table with the rest of the phones.

“Hunger makes us overthink, right?” Jin laughs awkwardly as the rest nodded though the question of your whereabouts remained on their minds

Three days. They had three days left and the hope they had in you receiving their messages decreased by the days. The nagging for them to drive to your apartment grew and not even the eldest of them could stop the temptation. The only thing stopping them was how the staff kept a closer eye on them to avoid any unnecessary injuries or scandals to arise right before the promotions began.

They thought that they would go to the States and do their promotions with the question of when you were coming back nagging in their minds, though their prayers were answered this Wednesday afternoon.

The boy’s were separated in two black vans. Three on one and Four on the other since they only spent five hours at the HYBE building today and had none of their personal assistants with them. Everyone was preparing in packing up and getting ready for four weeks of promotions in America, yet all of the boys held on to the little hope that they could see you before then.

Jungkook sat on a van with his sleeping Yoongi hyung and a Namjoon hyung that was typing away a message to send to his personal assistant for the products he needed to be bought from the grocery stores for their trip. Jungkook on the other hand just enjoyed sitting behind his two hyungs as he watched the buildings pass by the window. His phone was in his pocket and his head leaned on the glass of the window as nothing but the wheels turning and the engine working sounded in the van.

He was sure he would fall asleep any moment now, though the light vibration from his phone on his pocket had woken him up from dozing off. He took out his phone and checked the message as he was expecting his own PA to ask him for a list of things he needed. He even had a list written on his notes app already, so all he needed to do was copy it and paste it into their Kakaotalk chat.

However, a message from his PA was not what made his phone buzz. It was you.

Jungkook felt his heart skip a beat. Multiple beats. It felt like he was having a heart attack at the way the sound of his heart pumping was all he could hear as he tapped on the message notification you sent.

[17:35] Y/N: Jungkookie, why are you all sending such long messages?? You know I hate reading long ones 😭

[17:36] Y/N: I just got back to Busan city. Let me read your essay first, so that I can respond.

[17:37] Y/N: It better have good grammar HAHHAHAHAH.

You were laughing? Did you seriously laugh when… well you haven’t read their messages yet, and from the look on Hoseok’s face it seems like you haven’t responded to theirs yet either. Jungkook figured that his message was the one sent the latest since he was the last to send his, therefore he would be on top of your chats.

What did you mean that you just got back to Busan city? Why were you in Busan? Why are you so chill and laughing on chat? And why were you cracking jokes on how his message is so long that it could be an essay? Jungkook just couldn’t understand and his mind was simply too shocked to even tell his hyungs anything, so he waited.

He waited until he saw your bubbles appear to indicate you were typing something, and he watched when it would disappear for a while before coming back to type some more.

[17:47] Y/N: What the hell?! Jungkook, what do you mean break up??

What a short response after you seemed to have been typing for two minutes. Jungkook didn’t know what to respond. He was in shock, or maybe he was having a ture heart attack. He was dying or perhaps he was already dead, and his mind was playing hopeful games on him.

[17:49] Y/N: What do you mean Yoongi and Jin said something-something? I have to get to my hotel first, but we’ll talk about this later. Only us, I don’t like Jin and Yoongi telling you what you should or shouldn’t say. What are you guys doing?

You sounded strict despite messages not explicitly holding emotions, and suddenly Jungkook had to swallow a lump stuck in his throat. Hotel? Will you actually talk about the message later or are you saying that to avoid talking to him? God, he shouldn’t be thinking about this when he knows you wouldn’t do that to him or any of them. So instead he replied with a simple ‘okay’.

Typical Jungkook, because he was always one to be simple in his texting.

Jungkook waited. Patiently, he waited. Until the hours of the evening and when the members had planned to game in the living room. Jungkook waited with patience. After Yoongi excused himself to have some time alone, Jungkook also followed and claimed he wanted some fresh air because all this waiting was silently creeping up to his bones and muscles.

He could feel himself fidgeting and he knows Jimin sees it too. He should have probably told them about how you have internet now and probably read their messages, but something about the way you said ‘Only us’ made his tongue stuck in his throat. It suddenly felt like this was his first time talking to his crush and not his faithful partner and love of his life.

He walked around the hill for a few minutes with his head buried in his hoodie and a cap hiding his face under the stars of the sky. He was trying to calm his nerves.

Why was it taking you so long to get to a hotel? Why were you in Busan? You had no family in Busan, so why are you there? Since you’re talking to him does that confirm that you didn’t break up wi—

A buzz came through his phone and he almost dropped it as he took it out of his pocket to see that the notification had your name on it. He breathed out a breath of cold air first before he pressed it and read your message.

[20:07] Y/N: Jungkookie, sorry it's a bit late but I had to take care of some things before I could talk to you.

[20:07] Jungkook: Don’t worry about it, baby.

Jungkook’s breath hitched as he realized that he might’ve been overstimulating you by calling you ‘baby’ immediately. What happened to taking it slow and making sure they were there for you, so that you can determine that they care about your mental wellbeing?

[20:08] Y/N: Can we call? I need to talk to you properly and my fingers are tired from typing.

Jungkook chuckled as he sent a thumbs up emoji before he accepted your audio call. He placed the phone against his ears as he was about to say ‘hello’, though your voice beat him to it and greeted him first.

“Kookie?”

Your voice felt so foreign, yet sweet and melodic. Something he had yearned for too long that he could cry knowing all the nights he wished he heard it one more time. Your voice carried weight, though Jungkook’s mind went blank at comprehending any cues. Your voice held worry. Why were you all sending such long messages and why was Jungkook hurting?

Oh shit, was he crying? His mind finally caught up after getting lost in your voice. Something wet rolled down his cheeks as his nose sniffed and you repeated the call of his name.

“Yeah, baby. I’m here.” Jungkook responded as another tear rolled down his cheek and he didn’t do much to stop it, but to sniff his nose.

“Are you crying? Are you alright? What did you mean in the message? About Jin and Yoongi telling you what to do in your messages with me, and you hurting? Why are you hurting? Who hurt you, baby?” Your voice said in chorus, however it carried all the care that Jungkook had longed for in the past weeks.

Jungkook was fully sobbing into his phone now as he sits himself on a nearby bench, scared that if he doesn't sit then his body might collapse. He doesn’t really know why he was crying. I mean he finally got his wish of hearing your voice one last time, yet the care you had in your tone and your endearment through your words made him realize just how much he missed your voice.

“Jungkookie, I need you to calm down okay? Who’s there with you? Are any of the boys there?” You asked as Jungkook shook his head. No one was here. That’s what he liked about walking around Hannam The Hill at night. Usually people would be inside eating dinner or resting now, and they had the tightest security that not even his favorite food deliveries could enter and would require a staff member to pick the food up for them instead and deliver it to their dorm.

“No… I’m— I’m out for a walk right now… I missed you…” Jungkook whispered the last part more so to himself, though you heard it clear as day.

“Kookie… can you explain to me thoroughly what you meant in your message?” You asked softly as Jungkook forced his sniffles away to tell you everything.

He let it all out. About all his hyungs and him wanting to apologize to you and how much they’ve struggled without you. How they were all miserable during their practices, yet they all sucked it up for the promotions.

He told you how Jin would come out of his room with eyebags from forgetting to sleep because of his games, and how Yoongi already had three songs in the works because he was overworking himself day and night again. He told you how Hoseok wasn’t doing well with the choreography and didn’t even care when the members got something wrong. He told you how Namjoon had been an overthinking mess and was practically observing all of the boy’s moves. Namjoon might think he’s sneaky, but Jungkook is aware of the fact that the leader stays up until he gets back to the dorm after his adventures. He told you how everyone in HYBE has a little clue that the seven of them were dumped because Jimin came in with the most swollen eyes that night you left. He even joked how Jimin must’ve told you something about the new gossip in the building, but left out the fact that they were part of the topic in hand. He told you how Taehyung had been getting really careless with the stuff he eats, and that he had even tried out some new candies from his hyung’s cravings that were stashed in their bedroom mini fridge.

He told you how their fighting stopped when they didn’t have to sit down on the same table to eat dinner. They didn’t have you to gather together for, so what stopped them from eating in their rooms? He told you how they had their first agreed discussion because the subject of the topic was you.

He told you everything and he knew his hyungs would call him a snitch afterwards, though he didn’t care. If they weren’t going to beg for you, then he would for the rest of them.

“Jungkookie… I— I…” You were at a loss for words as you took in what he said and opened up another tab to see all their long messages.

“That’s why we need you back, baby. It hurts. It hurts me to see them like this, and it hurts me more to know that we’ll forever be incomplete.” Jungkook said as swallows a lump in his throat to stop his emotional rant. If you broke up with him now then at least he knew he did his best.

“Jungkook ah! Did yours get seen too?” Taehyung’s voice shouted as soon as his eyes landed on the youngest member entering the dorm through the entrance corridor. The other six men in the room turned to see what the youngest would answer.

“Huh?” He asks as he removes his mask and walks to where his hyungs sat in the living room.

“Has Y/N seen your message already?” Jimin says as Jungkook eyes all their opened phone screens. He checks his own phone and sees that his long message did get seen and nods as he eyes the rest of the men.

“Wait! Mine just got seen too!” Taehyung jumps up from his seat as he shows his phone screen to everyone. Jungkook lets out a small chuckle to himself. His hyungs reaction to getting his message seen was so different from his silent heart attack. Taehyung’s smile never looked so bright despite the unsureness of the situation.

“Baby, called me earlier…” Jungkook breaks the ice as all his hyungs turn to him with curiosity in their wide eyes.

“When?”

“What.”

“Huh??”

“Earlier?”

“What did she say?”

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

The boys spoke synchronously as Jungkook closed his eyes and tried to roughly summarize the events of the phone call.

“Baby, saw my message earlier in the ride back to the dorm and told me we needed to call privately—“

“So that’s why you were so fidgety and walked out.” Jimin interrupts as Namjoon takes this statement seriously and sends an even more intense glare to the maknae.

“I didn’t intend to keep the call secret, that’s why I’m telling you now…”

“You tried to hide the fact that Y/N saw your message already when I asked you. Do you call that being honest?” Taehyung bites back a little angry at being left out at some very important information, and he wasn’t the only one feeling this way.

“No, I—“

“Jungkook ah, you are going to be honest with us, won’t you?” Hoseok speaks up as Jungkook’s eyes widens and he was about to tell everyone that he would be completely honest to them. However, a few more boys spoke up about Jungkook’s honesty.

“Can we really trust him? He has been sneaking off lately…”

“Jungkook, this isn’t just something to be light about. We need every detail honestly as it was, because this isn’t just about your relationship with her, it's ours too.”

“I can’t belie—“

“God, can’t you guys listen for once?! I’m telling you that I’ll tell the truth, but you haven’t even let me speak for once. Was this how we treated Y/N that night, because I’d definitely leave any moment now.” Jungkook’s loud voice spoke as the room went silent. Jungkook takes a breath in to clear his mind before he continues. It didn’t matter if his hyungs took his words seriously now. He just wants the events out before any altercation.

“Baby called and said something about spending some time in the provinces outside Busan with her aunt and uncle.”

“With her favorite cousin?” Hoseok asks as Jungkook nodded.

“Yeah that one. That’s why our messages were getting bounced back. She saw mine first when she finally got signal because mine was sent last, and she said she’d call me and talk about it ‘cause I kinda went overboard with my message…”

“I knew you wouldn’t follow what I said.” Yoongi massaged his forehead, though gestured for him to continue.

“Yeah… I continued to not listen to you in the call either because I kinda dumped everything I’ve noticed us do without her and begged for her not to dump us…” Jungkook straightens his lips as he thinks back at how he got carried away exposing their weakest parts in a phone call.

Jin slaps his own forehead and Yoongi’s jaw drops as he contains his emotions by closing his eyes. Namjoon and Hoseok had their mouths open as Jimin and Taehyung looked at the youngest like he was crazy, though turned to each other to help keep their chuckles held back as they could already imagine your face when Jungkook vents out.

“Jungkook ah, what exactly did you tell her about Jin hyung?” Jimin asks as he leans on his elbows from his seat on the couch. Jungkook looks down at where Jin sits at the edge of the couch furthest from where he stands and swallows.

“I told her about how Jin hyung plays all night and forgets to sleep…” Jungkook’s voice was meek though it was enough to send Jimin and Taehyung laughing to lean their head at the back of the couch.

“And what did you tell her about Jimin?” Jin challenges as Jimin snaps out of his laughter and stares into Jungkook’s soul.

“I told her about how the entire HYBE building knows we got dumped because Jimin hyung came to work with the most swollen eyes…”

“Yah! Were you looking for a fight?!” Jimin threatens as he stands up with a fist ready to fake a fight, though they were all silenced when Hoseok’s serious voice speaks from the laughter of Jin and Taehyung and pulls on the fabric of Jimin’s shirt to sit him back down on the sofa.

“How did she respond to your confession?” Hoseok asks as Jungkook drops his head to gaze at the floor and all the members’ hearts sink to their stomachs. Fuck, what else would elicit that reaction if not the news that they were truly dumped.

“She said that she wanted to meet us, so that she could talk about it face-to-face.” Jungkook says as Namjoon carefully runs his hand through his hair.

“Talk about what?” Namjoon asks as Jungkook shrugs his shoulders.

“Jungkook, be honest.” Yoongi warns as Jungkook looks up to meet all their eyes.

“I asked her what she wanted to talk about but she just said that we’d talk about it then. All of us will go. If we can…” Jungkook says as Jin, Yoongi, Hoseok, and Namjoon collectively look at each other with furrowed brows.

“Right, we’ll meet with her tomorrow, and beg her to come back!” Jimin says as if it was the most absolute plan.

“How do we know that Jungkook is telling the truth? What if this is some sick joke?” Taehyung speaks up as Jungkook looks offended at the statement.

“Would I joke about something like this?” Jungkook asked as the room silenced, though the sound of their phones buzzing got all their heads turning towards their phones.

A message from you.

[20:59] Y/N: Jungkook told me everything and I saw your messages. Let’s meet up sometime soon? I’ll be in Seoul by nine in the morning tomorrow. When are you guys free?

Everyone had quickly jumped to their phones to begin typing a response, though Hoseok quickly halted everyone.

“Are we even free tomorrow? Weren’t we supposed to have a meeting over our visas and papers for America tomorrow? We have less than three days.” Hoseok voices out his worries as Namjoon licks his lips and looks at all the boys that had their eyes on him. His brain has already begun formulating a plan that would satisfy all of them.

“I’ll message management and reschedule our meeting in the evening. Y/N comes first.” Namjoon says the last sentence as a fact that they all agree on as messages in response to your message flowed through their group chat.

The date was scheduled and some relief filled all their bodies. However, none of them were sure if tomorrow’s meet up with you would bear good or bad news.

You entered the restaurant that you and the boys both loved going to. A familiar staff of the restaurant leads you past regular tables to their private rooms. It was uncommon to have private room bookings early in the day, especially on a weekday so the restaurant was fairly empty and you were led to one of the largest private rooms the restaurant had.

Although your time helping out your aunt and uncle after your cousin’s death had been healing, and gave you closure from the untimely death, that didn’t mean that you hadn’t missed your boys. Your seven lovely men that you loved way too much for it to be healthy.

You thought about your actions and partly took the blame for walking out so abruptly, though when you read their messages and heard from Jungkook everything that they had been doing without you, you couldn’t help but feel a little angry at how they clearly were relying on you to take care of themselves.

That’s why you called to meet them. You were sure the break would last at most a month and spending time away at the province had healed your mental despair, so you weren’t about to ignore them just as they’ll leave for promotions. Namjoon said it himself, he can’t handle America without you as a support system and surely the boys need someone to help ground them too, but that doesn’t mean that they can let go of themselves just because you weren’t there.

You knocked on the traditional wooden door before you slid it open and peaked your head to see the seven boys staring at you with wide eyes as they stood up from their seats. You took a step into the room and closed the door behind you. Part of you had expected all of them to jump at you, though they all stayed in their spots seemingly cautious of your presence as you turned to face them.

They were wearing relatively relaxed outfits as you didn’t even get to change from your train ride from Busan. You wore denim high-waisted baggy jeans with a gray fitted long-sleeve top with a puffer jacket of your favorite color and a beanie that matched it. A standard outfit, though it made you feel a bit overdressed when you see that Jungkook and Hoseok were wearing literal shorts.

“Hey… sorry I’m a bit late. I ran into some traffic on the way here.” You smiled at them whilst you removed your coat and beanie. Jin had immediately come to your side to help take your coat and hat off to place to the side whilst greeting you with a cautious kiss on the cheek to which you smiled at.

“No worries, we just arrived too.” Namjoon smiles, though the rest of the members knew for a fact that they were here half an hour early just in case you were early.

You observed that the table had exactly eight seats. Jimin, Taehyung, Jungkook, and Namjoon sat on the left side and Hoseok, Yoongi, and Jin on the right side. The only available seat being the one in between Yoongi and Jin, so you slowly walked towards it. Each step reverberated against the walls and it was starting to feel suffocating in the large private room.

“Someone please talk, this is getting awkward.” You spoke with a chuckle at the end as the men all laughed and Yoongi greeted you as you reached your seat.

“We just missed you, Love.” Yoongi says timidly, though as his hand snakes its way to your waist and you make no move to inch away from it, he warms up and flashes you a smile and kisses your cheek. His lips were warm and soft on your cheek and two kisses from your eldest boyfriends instantaneously placed your heart at ease.

“I think ‘miss’ as a word doesn’t describe how we felt.” Hoseok says behind you as you turn to greet him with a hug next. Your arms slotted right around his torso as his arms wrapped around your waist and he leaned down to place a peck on your forehead.

“Baby~ we want kisses too!” Taehyung says from across the table as you turn to face them and their whole side of the table quickly walks towards your seat. They seemed more at ease now that you hadn’t shown any hint of being uncomfortable or overstimulated from their words or actions. However, there was still an underlying emotion under their eyes that you couldn’t quite identify.

Once everything was settled you all sat down and let your eyes roam over the food on the table. Plates of meat circled around the grill in the middle of the table. Small plates of side dishes and other dishes scattered for everyone’s access. It reminds you of the small pack of biscuits you had eaten nearly five hours ago since you had slept the entire train ride from Busan to Seoul.

“Let’s eat first? I think everyone’s hungry.” Jin offers the idea to everyone as you just noticed that he had been eyeing you hungrily taking in the food on the table the entire time.

Everyone hummed in agreement as you watched them slowly take some meat to place on the grill. Your hands joined them as you swallowed and looked around to see if any of them would start talking.

“So… How come you’re free right now? I thought you’d be busy with last minute preparations for promotions.” You said as you took a tong and placed some meat on the grill, though Jin was already beating you to it and took the first cooked meat on the grill to place on your bowl.

“That’s what I actually wanted to tell you about that night. We wanted to have dinner with you before we went to America. Something like celebrating your birthday in advance.” Taehyung says as before he chews on a gimbap.

A sudden realization hitting you as all you needed was a night of being back to normal to get mentally better. Perhaps if you were patient enough….

“I’m sorry abou—“

“You did what you had to.” Yoongi cuts you off as you turn to look at him. He leaned back on his chair with his arm laid on the back of your seat.

“I think Jungkookie has told you everything already, so you would know that breaking up with us taught us a few valuable lessons.” Jimin says as he drinks on a glass of coca cola and throws a glance at the youngest labeled ‘snitch’.

“What? Break up?” You asked as you furrowed your brows and looked around the table to see that the boys all looked at you with varied expressions of looming sadness

“Yeah, you said you needed a break but really it’s easing us to a break up. We’re not stupid baby.” Taehyung says a bit tense, though Jimin’s hand on his shoulder had eased him to calm down a little.

“What?! I never and will never think about breaking up with you. Unless you guys want to.” You said as you looked at them in disbelief.

“What no! Never!”

“Never, baby!”

A series of disagreements filled the table as they all silenced when Namjoon’s authoritative voice bloomed amidst the sea of uncompensable words.

“We were meant to beg you to stay with us during this meal. What do you mean you aren’t breaking up with us?” Namjoon says as you chuckled and threw your head back to rest on Yoongi’s arm.

“God, no. I said I needed a break. I was mentally exhausted after my cousin died, that’s why I went to the provinces for two weeks and got some needed healing and help out my aunt and uncle. You guys were always tired so I figured you also needed a rest from me.” You said and the boys all collectively blinked at you as if they had finally gotten to the same page as you. However, a looming sadness washes over them as they process the news of your grievance.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t understand me from my explanation that night. Were we not on the same page for almost three weeks?” You asked as Hoseok cleared his throat.

“Beautiful, you are our rest.” The lead dancer said as Jungkook raised a finger to pipe in.

“We were somewhat on the same page…” Jungkook says as Jimin and Taehyung nod to support his statement.

“We knew you needed mental rest, but we all got convinced by Taehyung that you were eventually turning this break into a break up. We didn’t— we didn’t know about…” Yoongi trails off from beside you as you abruptly stop leaning on his arm and catch his eyes with a hint of grief with you.

“God, you guys are stupid. Namjoon, did you really leave them to think like this?” You ask towards the leader as he just shrugs and keeps his eyes on the food in his bowl.

“No wonder you were all miserable. Why didn’t you at least contact me— ah shit, I’m part to blame too. I shouldn’t have walked out on you guys.” You said more to yourself as they shook their heads to dismiss your apologies.

“It’s not your fault. We just weren’t listening. We were too busy being full of ourselves and fighting. We didn’t know you had to grieve by yourself.” Jin says and you massage your forehead with a hand that leaned on the table as silence engulfed the table once more.

“I’m so sorry for your loss…”

“We all are sorry…”

“H-How did it even happen? They were so young.”

“I don’t really want to talk about it right now…” You said silently as they all watched as you shook your head whilst rubbing circles on your forehead. You let out a chuckle though it wasn’t one that they could laugh with.

“I wanna focus on this funny mess. I mean… at least you got your fighting sorted, that’s what Jungkook said to me last night at least.” You said and their lips spread into a smile and some even let out a chuckle and a nod of their heads. You were done grieving and you practically spent two weeks of grieving, so you really needed something else to think about. And the topic of your dumb miscommunication and stupidity seemed like the best distraction.

“Don’t think that I’m not mad by everything Jungkook told me. Jin, you ended the message you sent me with ‘take care’ and from what Jungkook told me, you were barely sleeping because you’ve been gaming too much again. Yoongi, you know how much I hate it when you overwork or bring your work to the dorm even after hours of working in your studio. I can’t always be there to remind you to take care of yourselves.”

The men that sat on either side of you pouted at you though your face stayed stoic.

“I’m disappointed. Now, I can’t even show my face in HYBE because everyone thinks I dumped you and if you don’t do well in your promotions then the blame is on me.”

“It’s not your fault, baby.” Jimin says comfortingly though you send him a glare that quickly quiets him.

“Is it true that the gossip you were teasing in your message is about us?” You asked as the man forced a smile and sent glare at Jungkook as the younger avoided eye contact from everyone.

“I’m going to sort this out somehow. I just need you guys back in shape to perform.” You shake your head as you pick up a piece of pork to chew on and the table goes silent once again.

“You know…I’ve been thinking for a long time and I feel like this would be the best moment to ask for it, but do you want to go to America with us?” Namjoon speaks up as all eyes go to him and to you.

You were taken aback by the question. It was one of the few rules that management had for your relationship with them and now they were asking for you to break it.

“We missed almost three weeks from you and it feels like we’ve missed everything, and it’s almost your birthday so why don’t we celebrate it there too?” Namjoon was smiling as you stared at him like he was delusional.

“Joonie, as much as I want to, your management would—“

“If you’ve read my message then you would know that I don’t care. I don’t give a fuck if the media sees us. I need you, and I speak for everyone if we haven’t gone abroad and thought about how it would be if we went to those places with you. We can book you a ticket from our personal money if we have to. We’ll sort out your accommodations and everything. All you need to do is say yes.” Namjoon asks as all eyes settle on you.

You swallow a lump in your throat and weigh out your options. If you were caught then your name could be out there, and were you ready for that? But they all looked at you with such hope in their eyes and the sound of exploring new horizons with the loves of your life seemed like a dream. They said it themselves, you were their rest, and it seemed like the best way to catch up on some needed loving.

“I just came from Busan, I’m tir—“

“Y/N, it’s a yes or no, please.” Namjoon says and you swallow with a nod as a smile creeps up your cheeks. The boys began smiling brighter right as you said ‘yes’.

“I’ll get it sorted then. We have a meeting later and I’ll bring it up.” Namjoon smiles as the dinner table erupts with cheers and it breaks off to conversations about what they’d be doing there during their free time with you.

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multific · 2 years ago

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Pure Love

Daemon Targaryen x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mention of Smut, Murder

When your husband mentioned a meeting with his family, you knew things would go down fast.

When you married him you knew at one point his family will have issues with you.

You weren't a Targaryen, you weren't a God. You were a simple woman who fell in love with a man who happened to be Targaryen.

Daemon and you never allowed his last name to get between you two until now.

He warned you of his family, and of the comments, you might receive. You knew they definitely have something to say.

"Just ignore their comments, they are weak and they try to compensate."

"They are not weak, they are jealous, My Love. You and I got married out of love and not duty, something they do not understand, something they might never experience in their lives." Daemon smiled and nodded, you understood so well.

You could tell by everyone's faces, your arrival was not expected. You being wed to Daemon was not expected. But besides a couple side-eyed glances, nothing was said or done.

Until dinner.

First, it was bickering between the children, but soon the adults joined in.

As everyone got more and more drinks, resulting in many men drunk, that's when it started.

A person, a man, his name you forgot but Daemon repeated before dinner, said to be married to his niece or something, you didn't really pay attention Daemon looked way too beautiful in his formal clothing. The man started insulting you.

First, it was just a couple of words about you not being noble, not being born with 'dragon blood' as he said, this, you could have forgiven him.

"I don't think a whore like her should sit with us." to this comment, your husband's hand clenched the chair, you only hoped he wouldn't do anything too irrational but then again, this man was really challenging you two on your patience.

"I'm not too sure I understand what you mean, Daenegar." the two men looked at each other intensely as everyone just stayed silent.

"This whore you married." he said pointing at you. "She obviously just wanted to get your royal name, what a disgrace."

"Be careful with your words, Cousin." Deamon warned but the man just laughed, obviously very drunk.

"Careful with my words? How about you be careful where you stick it into, she is truly disgusting. And also-" with a swift movement, Daenegar's head was now on the table, blood oozing everywhere as you lift your cup.

"Cheers." you said to the others before taking a drink and continuing with your meal. Everyone looked terrified, not even the men expected this kind of reaction yet here it was. Daenegar dead as Daemon cleaned off his sword. And you just continued to eat as if nothing happened.

"Anyone else has any words towards my wife will meet the same fate." he simply said as he sat down beside you.

Needless to say, dinner wasn't the same after. Not to say that most women went white as the wall upon seeing the head and the decapitated body of Daenegar.

You two were now back at your chambers, his fingers caressing your naked back as he looked at you with pure love.

"Did you really marry me for my name?" he asked. You were still a bit disoriented, Daemon made a point to you about how much he loves you truly, once both of you were back in your chambers. The love-making went on for a long time, it must have been very late now, but you just kept staring into his gorgeous eyes, barely feeling your legs at this point.

"Totally. I married you for your name, indeed. And your dragon."

"I always knew you liked Caraxes."

"Not that dragon." you smirked at it took him a moment to realize what you meant.

"You naughty fox." he laughed a little as he moved onto his elbow, you shifted as well, moving closer to him. "I love you so much."

"I know Daemon. You proved yourself today quite a bit. You defended my honour, and you proved your tongue was made for more than just talking."

"You really are a naughty fox, My Lady." that damn smirk on his face was possibly the sexiest thing you have seen in your entire life.

You lifted your hand to run your fingers down his cheeks and jaw to his lips. As you moved your finger he placed a kiss on it, pouting against it, making you smile.

Just how pure your for this man was, it almost hurt at times.

"Tomorrow will be hectic."

"More so than today?" you asked as you let out a yawn.

"Precisely. Word will spread that I killed Daenegar. People might come fight me."

"I doubt that. Everyone here is afraid of you, I highly doubt they will even dare to look at me the wrong way, let alone fight you."

"If that's true, then my plan worked." you hummed as you closed your eyes, ready to sleep after such an exhausting day. "I love you too."

Daemon placed his head into the crook of your neck, placing a kiss on your skin and he too decided to get some sleep.

Taglist: imreadinggoaway @fleursirvart @v-2bucky ehsebastiancrunch-time-sports @pxstelrainbow ablogbypeteparker liamssmilersmexylemony @greenarrowhead feelingsareharddd @thisismysecrethappyplace @sincerelyfan @theoneanna @aestheticsandmarvel @rororo06 @castellandiangelo @avengers-r-us @destynelseclipsa @spilledinkindumpster celebsimagine @capsiclesdoll snoopy3000 @firstangeldragonranch @puknow @crazzyter @alwayshave-faith @soleil-dor @alex12948 scream-kiwi79 @lxdyred @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @liveforkarljacobs @anonymoussherlockandmarvelgeek @paola-carter @stunkbiggu

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

DO NOT REPOST OR TRANSLATE ANY OF MY WORKS

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toasterdrake · 2 years ago

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Doric x gn!Reader - First Watch

Doric cuddling up to you because it's cold, with a dash of unrequited (?) pining

"I'll take first watch," you say, "Keep an eye on the horses."

Edgin nods and lets you go. He has dinner to craft and plans to brew.

The horses are tethered just outside the copse of trees the party has made your campsite. Hills sprawl out around the overgrown crown, a blanket of navy green under the sapphire of an evening sky. Wind brushes the trees and long grass; the horses nicker softly to each other.

Making the rounds, you loosen each saddle's girth to ensure their comfort for the night. Yelps punctuate flashes of light behind you; Simon is practicing a new spell from the scroll you had recently been compensated with. Doric is laughing at his misfortune; oh, how charming he is.

You settle for your watch on a patch of soft grass skirting a proud birch tree. Silver bark is cool against your back, and the Northern wind is icy. You shiver, pulling your cloak tighter around your shoulders. The sun's warmth has begun to seep from the earth, leaving the hillside cold.

Petrichor is in the air, haze of falling rain distant over the hills. It'll reach your campsite in the night. When your watch is over and a cold dinner in your belly, you'll warn the others. Not that much can be done in the face of nature.

The evening wanes, sky darkening into indigo. Firelight trickles through shadows of trees, quiet discussion whispers on the breeze.

"You know, usually when people volunteer for first watch it's because they want to be alone."

Gentle so as not the spill the contents of the bowl she's holding, Doric nudges you with her foot.

"Edgin said to bring you dinner before it goes cold."

"Oh. Alright. Thanks."

When you take the bowl from her -- it is warm in your hands; you cradle it as your only vestige of the far-off fire -- Doric settles next to you against the birch.

"Oh, are you going to stay?"

"Would you like me to go?"

You almost want her to leave, but more than anything you want her to stay. Moreover, she wants to stay, so who are you to deny her?

"No, I don't mind." A beat passes as you bring the spoon up to your mouth. "Can I ask why, though?"

Doric shuffles her feet, watching the toes of her boots shift grass. "It's just... Simon, he's... he's nice and all, but..."

"He's into you and that makes you uncomfortable?" You supply.

Relieved you've filled in the blanks, Doric nods. Finding her words is easier now. "He doesn't seem to get that... that he's fighting for a second chance when I've already told him no."

Listening to the world surround the two of you, Doric is silent for a while. She picks at grass, knotting blades together. You stay quiet as well, focused on eating, grateful to be trusted as a rare space to vent.

Eventually, "My reason last time was that he made me feel sad, but it wasn't really his fault. He made me sad because I was trapping myself, trying to feel something for him."

Doric begins tearing at the grass crown she'd built, before giving up and letting it scatter in the wind. "I never should've given him a first chance. How am I supposed to turn him down now?"

Setting your empty bowl on a mossy root of the tree, you give your full attention to the druid beside you. Though Doric's question is likely rhetorical, you need to answer it. For her sake.

"You don't have to give him an excuse. 'No' will always be enough. He'll understand that, even if it takes him some time."

The smile Doric gives you is tired, but undeniably grateful. You hate the way your heart seizes in your chest.

The birch's roots cradle the two of you too closely, and now your shoulders are pressed together with nowhere to go. Doric seems unfazed, perfectly comfortable against you. You bring your knees up just for the excuse of locking your arms around them, holding your own hand instead of hers.

The evening wanes further into night, yet Doric shows no indication of leaving, despite shivers chasing up her spine on occasion. Surely a seat by the fire would be warmer, so why is she here with you? Does she dread Simon that strongly?

Disillusioned by the bite of the wind, Doric leans further into you. She seems to take comfort in the warmth of your body, and you don't have the strength in your heart to push her away. Instead, you open up -- bringing your cloak around to encompass Doric as well.

Smiling against you, Doric sighs deeply, light and content. She tucks her head under yours, chin resting on your collarbone. Your throat bobs, your hand resting on her shoulder under the cloak. The impression of a horn presses against the underside of your jaw, and copper hair tickles your neck. Doric's tail curls around your leg in a comforting gesture.

Damn your heart.

#dndhat #dndhat doric #doric #doric the druid #doric x reader #doric x fem reader #doric x male reader #doric x gn reader #doric imagine #dndhat x reader #dndhat imagine #dnd honour among thieves #dungeons and dragons hat #dungeons and dragons honour among thieves #posting from college before my class starts #gifs wont load i feel like a fraud /j

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marsi-is-depressed · 21 days ago

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Anger strikes again

Chapter 2. Continuing with the most basic skill story the doctor gets annoyed with the tardis and takes his anger out on the reader telling her to shut up when she was talking to him.

The Doctor stormed through the console room. Something wasn’t working—the stabilizers, the temporal drift compensator, or maybe it was just the old girl being temperamental. Either way, his frustration boiled over, each failed attempt to fix the issue making his irritation worse. You had been sitting nearby, nervously watching as he muttered under his breath, his movements sharp and impatient. Wanting to help, you hesitantly began speaking, stumbling over your words as you tried to offer an idea.

“M-m-maybe the p-p-power flow needs—”

“Y/N, just stop!” the Doctor snapped, his voice loud and cutting. He didn’t even look at you, his focus still on the console. “Just—shut up for a moment, alright? I can’t think with you stammering on like that!”

The words hit you like a physical blow. Your breath caught in your throat, and you froze, the room suddenly feeling too bright, too loud. Tears welled in your eyes, but you blinked them away, silently retreating from the console room as his words echoed in your mind.

In your room, you paced back and forth, your thoughts spiraling out of control. Why can’t I just talk like everyone else? Why am I such a burden? His words had cut deep, amplifying every insecurity you already felt. If only I were normal. If only I could talk properly, maybe he wouldn’t get so annoyed with me. Maybe he wouldn’t hate me. The frustration built rapidly, bubbling into anger—anger at yourself. You clenched your fists, tears streaming down your face. Before you could stop yourself, you swung your fist at the wall, the pain exploding through your wrist as you made contact. You stumbled back, clutching your wrist, but the physical pain didn’t stop the torrent of self-loathing. You sank to the floor, cradling your injured hand, your sobs wracking your body.

River returned to the TARDIS not long after, immediately sensing the tension in the air. The Doctor was still in the console room, pacing like a caged animal. “What’s wrong with her now?” she asked, her sharp tone making the Doctor pause.

“What’s wrong with her?” he repeated, his voice dripping with frustration. “She’s brilliant, but she doesn’t give me a moment’s peace sometimes! She just—she doesn’t stop, River. And I—” River’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “What did you do, Doctor?”

“I might’ve… snapped at her,” he admitted, his voice quieter now, guilt creeping in. “I told her to shut up.”

River’s fury ignited. “You what?!” she shouted, her voice cutting through the TARDIS hum like a blade. “How could you say that to her? You know how she feels about herself already!”

The Doctor winced, realizing how deeply he’d messed up. “I didn’t mean it. I just—”

“No,” River interrupted, stepping closer, her voice like steel. “You don’t just snap at your child like that. Do you have any idea what that could’ve done to her?”

Before the Doctor could respond, the TARDIS pulsed urgently, her lights flickering toward your room. River’s heart sank, and without another word, she turned and sprinted down the corridor.

River burst into your room, her sharp eyes immediately taking in the scene: you on the floor, clutching your wrist, tears streaming down your face. Her heart broke at the sight of you, but her fury only grew.

“Oh, love,” she murmured, kneeling beside you. “What did you do to yourself?”

You shook your head, trying to pull away, but she gently caught your uninjured hand. “Let me see,” she said softly, her voice steady but insistent. When you hesitated, her voice softened even more. “Please, Y/N. Let me help you.” Reluctantly, you held out your injured wrist, and she winced at the swelling. “It’s broken,” she said, her tone calm but tinged with worry. “We’ll get it sorted, but first—why, love? Why did you do this to yourself?”

“I-it’s my fault,” you choked out, your words stammered but laced with raw emotion. “I’m t-t-too much. I c-can’t t-t-talk right. H-he hates m-me.”

River’s expression softened, her anger now entirely focused on the Doctor. “Oh, darling,” she whispered, pulling you into her arms. “None of this is your fault. And he doesn’t hate you—he loves you more than anything. He just doesn’t know how to show it sometimes, the idiot.” You sobbed into her shoulder, your injured wrist resting awkwardly between you. She held you tightly, murmuring reassurances. “You are not too much,” she said firmly. “You are everything to us. And I’ll make sure he understands that.”

River tended to your wrist as best she could before storming back to the console room. The Doctor was waiting, guilt written all over his face.

“River, I—”

“No,” she snapped, cutting him off. “You listen. You may be a genius, but when it comes to parenting, you are a complete fool sometimes. Do you have any idea how much damage you’ve done?”

The Doctor looked away, his voice small. “I didn’t mean to hurt her.”

“Well, you did,” River said sharply. “And now you need to fix it.”

She pointed toward your room. “Go. Talk to her. Apologize. And this time, actually think before you speak, or so help me, Doctor, I’ll leave you stranded on a moon somewhere.”

The Doctor nodded, swallowing his pride and his fear as he made his way to your room. He found you sitting on the edge of your bed, your wrist carefully wrapped by River’s handiwork. Your eyes were red and swollen, your face streaked with dried tears.

“Y/N,” he said softly, stepping inside. “I—I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said what I did. I didn’t mean it. And I never, ever want you to think that I don’t love you, because I do. More than anything.”

You looked away, your voice barely above a whisper. “It’s m-my fault.”

“No,” the Doctor said firmly, sitting beside you. “No, it’s not. This is my fault, Y/N. I was frustrated, and I took it out on you. And that’s not okay. None of this is your fault, sweetheart. Not your stammer, not your feelings, nothing.”

He hesitated before reaching for your good hand. “You are brilliant, just as you are. And I’m so sorry for making you feel like you’re not.”

Tears welled in your eyes again, but this time, they carried a flicker of relief. “O-okay,” you whispered.

The Doctor wrapped his arms around you gently, careful of your wrist. “We’ll get through this, Y/N. I promise.”

From the doorway, River watched, her expression softening as she saw the two of you together. The road ahead would be difficult, but as long as they had each other, she knew you’d make it through

#eleventh doctor x reader #doctor who x reader #doctor who #river song x daughter reader #river song #stammer #punching the ground #frustation #emotional distress #motherly love #parents #tw depressing thoughts #Reader feels like she can't do anything right #fluff #hugs #tw violence

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shay11a · 5 years ago

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New Rules, an overly long review

Alright, let’s do this.

I’ll just start with a little disclaimer that english is not my first language and although I’m usually fluent-ish some of my sentences might not translate very well from french, so please bear with me. Also this i like barely edited so sorry about the mistakes.

I’m here to talk about my favorite fanfiction, not only in this fandom, but in all fandom (and trust me, I’m a part of a lot of fandoms), and of all the fanfictions I’ve ever read (and trust me I’ve read a lot) : New Rules by the amazing @tayegi

The first time I read, I binge read it, but make no mistake, I don’t mean that I rushed though the story in one day, oh no, I mean I couldn’t do anything else, every minute of my day that I wasn’t in class or adulting, I was reading it, but it’s one of those rare fictions where I knew I was reading something just that good that I needed to make it last as much as possible. Imagine my struggle, balancing the need to know what was going to happen next and my visceral need to make it last as much as possible because I knew I could never experience this first reading again.

That’s how much I love this story.

Unfortunetaly, there came a time I caught up.

So I re-read it.

Again.

And Again.

To this day, I often come back to it, re-reading entirely or picking up at any point to enjoy again a moment that I particularly like. I do this often with fiction I particularly liked, but one thing that I find amazing with NR is that, contrary to most fic, no matter where I pick up, I know what is happening, what happened before that, because the plot is just so wonderfully crafted that everything has consequences, every character is relevant and their actions have consequences that they are held accountable to by the plot (dunno is this makes sense but it does in my native language sorry) I regret not posting a review under every chapter as I read, it was selfish on my part, but I needed to continue, I have some notes from this review at the end but they lack the specificity of first impressions, I apologize for that.

I also have to mention that this review is NOT spoiler free so if you want to read it please, PLEASE New Rules before that there is absolutely NO way that you won’t thank me (and Tayegi of course) afterwards, and don’t ‘I don’t mind spoilers’ me this story DESERVES to be read spoiler free.

Alright, buckle up kiddos, let’s do this.

I. The writing

The way the plot unveils is downright cathartic. I recently re-read it entirely to make this review and going back to the first chapters and seing how everything just MAKES SENSE and how a small thing happening has consequences over everything later. Just HUH brilliant. (I’m thinking about OC’s crush on Jimin here and how through the prism of Mijoo we later see that her crush was her projecting // Jin, now THAT’S WRITING)

The smut, how do I put it, is bomb but it doesn’t feel like smut smut, it feels like actual sex described, not idealized and in my opinion it just adds to the quality of the story, because sex is an essential part of the story, not something added to satiate the hormones of horny readers (as an ex-horny teenager, I want to thank people writing this kind of smut and say that there is nothing wrong with writing this kind of smut) or just for the sake of it because apparently having sex is the culminating point of a relationship. Sex scenes tell a story as much as argument scenes, if not more. First, because as a sex friends to lover AU (smh) it is inherently part of the story but also because the characters don’t just stop having a backstory, emotions and emotional baggage when they have sex, all those things are still present and they influence the way they act in bed. And THAT is satisfying to read.

On many occasions, in the fanfic writing community, you can hear (read?) people saying, « this fiction could / should be published like an actual book » I’m not here to further the debate on real literature, fanfiction and so what not, but this fiction is one that, more importantly than it being published, I feel like I could study in english class, take an extract and study the amazing characterization, how the scene furthers the plot, what are the literary devices used to do so. I feel like I could study the running metaphors, the sub plots and how they correlate so well to the main plot and further the characterization of a character, the plot itself or something else. Everything feels like a neatly knitted masterpiece.

In that aspect, one scene that I particularly liked was the one where OC is hidden listening to JK and Hyejin, and as she hears what he says, she crushes the rose in her hand. It’s such a simple and yet telling idea: her bourgeoning love and hope for a romantic relationship symbolized by the ultimate romantic symbol : a rose, and JK’s words make her try and crush those feelings, but she hurts herself doing so, because the action itself is a painful one — trying to refrain hope / trying to suffocate feelings — but also because love, just like roses has thorns that may hurt, that’s why JK is so afraid of committing it seems, and the irony is that he is doing exactly that to someone else. (My explanation is so messy plfnmesdmflfmqf sorry)

One recurring idea/plot device that I have noticed is the one of misunderstanding / misreading each others. OC and JK constantly misread each others (I’m thinking about the scene in the bar where she rubs his back affectionately and he interprets it in a sexual way) and idk but something about this really hits me hard, because it’s human, so inherently human, this makes the characters feel like human beings not fictional archetypes. Because in real life, we can’t take a step back and have a view of the bigger picture the way we can as an omniscient reader who remembers very well what one said or did earlier that explains their behavior. In real life we dont know and cannot guess why people act a certain way based on some hinted at tragic backstory that would explain their commitment issues.

On a lighter note, the writing is just so freaking FUNNY, like I can’t count how many times I cackled like an idiot reading. + Tayegi has a way of cutting from scenes to scenes or from dialogue to dialogue that is just so FUNNY (if it was a movie I would talk about editing because it’s exactly how it feels, like when you got A saying ‘I will never do that’ and it cuts and the next frame is A doing exactly that)

More on the writing in the notes for every chapter further below.

II. Feminism, social justice and me relating to everything

Ok this part is going to be a bit more personal but I had to address how much main girl and her struggles resonated with me. As a feminist myself I VERY often struggles with the same problem : that is when my beliefs come brutally crashing with the social constructs I have internalized and have yet to deconstruct as well as the people surrounded me who don’t necessarily share the same belief. And the way Tayegi portrayed this is spot on not to say borderline genius.

Her mixed feelings when facing Hoseok « not like other girls » comments or the conversation where she struggles to explain why she is fucking the notorious fuckboy despite her talks about hook-up culture were punches in the guts to me, because feminists are always the ones to be criticized the most easily (I am aware that my phrasing here is horrendous but I don’t know how to word this differently again sorry English is not my native language) and the slightest slip-up will be pointed at by people who aren’t even feminist but see an easy way to gaslight them. So, to read this, to read another woman facing the same situations and being as utterly upset and sometime powerless as I felt, god was it cathartic.

And don’t get me started on the way she always ALWAYS sticks by her principles of sorority, even to the women that have been nothing less than mean to her and how hard it is to support other women when we live in a society that always pit women against each others. I FELT that. But nevertheless main girl tries to, she compliments Somin on her dress, Hiejin as well even though they both have been openly hostile (and even mean sometimes) to her. I truly felt this, all theses little moments, just a sentence here and there, but I felt them in my guts.

III. The characters

The characters, oh god, the characters. OC ? Marry me. JK? Marry me (also I want to slap him but it’s another story). Taehyung ? Marry me. Mijoo? Marry me.

The relationship between OC and her BFF is in my opinion one of the best thing about the pic and one that really remarks it from other, the twist about twist alsmot made me believe it would be like every other pic where oc ends up with virtually no friend (especially female ones because like everyone know girls cause drama riiiight ) but it happens so early ? How could it ooooh it’s not like that, OC and her BFF and mature enough to discuss it, it still has consequences, the scene where OC accuses BFF of pushing her onto Jk to make herself feel better about jimmy still gives me chills because, yeah, it makes sens that she would, and it kinda feels like she did with how insistant she has been, but again, we are told the story from OC’s perspective, so obviously she feels bad when BFF insists that her and JK are meant to be bc she knows that JK wouldn’t date her, but again, as readers, we can kinda see from BFF perspective, they indeed look perfect for one another and only misunderstanding and insecurities and Jk’s past seems to be in the way (okay granted when you say it like that it seems like a lot), but in the end, Mijoo also seems genuine in the way she pushes them together, even though, yeah she might have, consciously or not done it for that reason.

i don’t know if I want a happy ending for OC and JK, I want one because they are so good and sweet together and after everything they’ve been through I feel like they sort of deserve it, but after everything they’ve been through, especially the way JK has behaved, it seems hard for a happy ending to happen. I feel like it’s going to take a lot of time and talking (including his backstory that has been hinted at a few times wink wink) for them to work things out, if they work things out.

I’ve mentioned that before but : THE SORORITY oh lord where do I start? OC standing up for Hyejin and Somin even when they had a few rough patches, sign me the fuck UP. OC not turning totally on her best friend Mijoo (my girl btw) and overlooking their friendship and what she had done for her in the time of Jin because Mijoo made a selfish mistake ? Yes please, MORE.

Hoseok is, in my opinion, spot ON. It took me some time to exactly pin point who he reminded me of but then I realized he is exactly what I call the 'apolitical guy’, who is convinced to not have controversial opinion and would deny ever having prejudice when he clearly has (i.e. the scene where Oc calls him out on his misogynie

I have to admit that Hyejin and Somin are amongst my favorites because even though the plot (and the fact that we are basically supposed to be on OC’s side as the story is told from her perspective) makes them very unsympathetic, your writing allows us to understand their actions and empathize with them. Learning about Hyejin’s past with JK makes her look like the character of a fan fiction where she could have been the main character unfortunately for her, this is OC’s story so Hyejin can’t get the guy in the end. But truly, her backstory feels like an entire other ff in the story and to be honest basically every other character’s backstory as well as the subplots feel this way. And Somin, well Somin is basically going through the same thing as OC but with Hoseok so how can we mock her for it while crying for OC ? That’s impossible and that’s why your writing is so powerful, there is no clear ‘bad guy’ (appart from J*n but who cares about that roquefort face) and everyone is in that gray, humane area.

Every character has so many layer (I don’t count JK and OC in this because at this point we can’t talk about layers anymore it’s a damn millefeuille) and getting to discover more about them is amazing.

Basically, every side character reflects something on OC and JK and further the plot, the themes while feeling like their own individuals with their own complex thoughts and problems and I think that’s fucking brilliant.

And now onto my notes for every chapter (it’s low-key very messy sorry)

Chapter 1 :

Lord to thing that it started with a simple friend request :’)

I love how in the very first line, OC telling Mijoo how she knows JK instantly characterizes him to the reader, it’s smart BUT also characterize OC as someone quick witted and serious/professional but also very sarcastic, funny and taking no shit from anyone. Incipit done well here. I mean, so much exposition is crammed into the very first lines but it just feels soooo natural!

I also love how the dynamic between Mijoo and OC can appear « basic » but will later be revealed to be so much more complex and profound and that’s basically how everything in this fic just keep getting better and more complex as you read.

Also, I love how OC and JK’s first encounter is because they are both trying to help their best friends, I missed it in the first reading but it’s so telling of their characters. Also I appreciate OC not hating on JK just because she hates him from afar and he suddenly notices her and gets turned on by that (like in a lot of ff let’s not lie, I love myself some bad boy!AU but it’s getting redundant), she genuinely seems to not give a fuck about him and it’s so funny to me somehow, my girl just minding her business, getting her straight A’s and doing charity work, we stan. Also, the entire part where they complain about Jimin and Mijoo is downright hilarious

I really like the way JK says the poetry assignment is easy, hinting at the fact that he is, in fact, not a stupid fuckboi cliché (+ what happens with their presentation and him working his BUTT of)

The entire part where OC and Jk act like they are together is so DAMN FUNNY but at the same time it just shows that they have great chemistry from the get go and I love that. (But seriously it’s so f*ing funny)

I love they way OC’s crush on Jimin is brought up, it’s not outwardly said, but the way he is described form her pov makes it obvious and her helplessness when looking at him and Mijoo is just so heartbreaking (+ getting to me on a personal level since I’ve been in a very similar situation for years so :))) like, you can feel that she doesn’t want to be feeling this way, and is obviously trying to help her BFF and be selfless but cannot help but feel jealousy.+ JK immediately catching up on her crush, showing he is more observant than you’d think.

JK and OC being dumb & dumber AND partner in crime is everything I’ve ever wanted

The description of the feeling of loneliness post-parties is so accurate, and the way she feels is so relatable and heartbreaking.

The part about anguish and the way she feels suffocated by her feminine attire got to me and honestly I got really close to cryingThe end of the chapter upsets me in the best way, to see JK be so oblivious to how vulnerable and lonely OC is, man it really makes the entire thing so much more gutswrenching.

Highlights (basically lines that made me laugh or that I find particularly well written) :

“then I don’t know why he’s friended you”

“should I block him too?”

“can you get you get more obvious without tattooing ‘Park Jimin’ on your ass? It’s obvious he owns it anyways”

“why does this kid has so many shirtless selfies”

“it’s like this boy is like a walking cliché of the world’s most basic fuckboi” I see what you did here ;)))

“Ah… you knew?” The way I laugh EVERY time at this line

“Would you be really mad at me if I poured this all over your boobs?“ alkfnenfmefnkgjh Mijoo is my queen

“try her ass instead” JK you absolute moron genius

“Mijoo as been trying to get you laid since freshman” I looove how this just sounds so random and plays into the cliché of the extroverted BFF trying to drag OC to parties and get her laid but with OC’s backstory // Jin it makes SO much more sense

“I won’t feed you lies” he, said, you know, like a liar.

“Your worth as a woman isn’t defined by your purity or whatever bullshit” love the hint at the later reveal that JK is, indeed, a woke king. We stan

“But unfortunately, you aren't the altruistic saint you wish you could be. You suffer from the same human emotions that plague everyone. And they aren't pretty.Despite what the artists and poets claim, the world works in a logical way. It's a simple mathematical formula. Girls like Mijoo end up with their princes. And you remain a bitter stepsister, helpless but to watch their happily ever after from a distance. One that you'll never achieve.” God that part....

“Here is a man who actually wants you. Not you, but your body, a little voice in the back of your head reminds you. But it doesn't matter. All that matters is that someone might actually desire you… ... He feels so thick inside of you that for a moment, the hole in your chest is filled” This is what I mean when I say that the smut in this story makes SENSE

“You wish you could cling onto this feeling forever so you'll never feel empty again.” The way this scene is supposed to be all smut sexy time but it is actually one of the most emotionally packaged and heart wrenching scene, really I can’t with your writing </333

“He grins at that, "I thought you knew me better than to take anything I said seriously?“Jk you manipulative mf I hate your fuckboi ass

"Ugh, please don't tell me you're a cuddler," you grumble as you twist in his embrace. "I'm not," he denies, but the way he buries his nose in your hair says otherwise, "And don't think about asking me to stay the night, because I'm not that kind of guy." The dynamic of the entire duo summed up in one paragraph

Chapter 2 :

The moment she reassures Mijoo and see what she is missing is :((

I remember than the first time I read new rules and feminist JK came clean I was honestly shocked (years of being guarded around men’s misoginy and fake feminism I guess) but re-reading it, it’s so nice to see the hints everywhere that he genuinely is and it warms my heart.

The convo JK and OC have about relationships and meaningless sex is not only such a good foreshadowing of the problems they will face later when it comes to coming clean about both their feelings (looking at you JK you moron) but also such a relatable feeling of ‘I know I said men are trash but I’m still vaguely heterosexual and would really like to believe that some aren’t and I know it sounds like I’m reassuring myself and honestly I am because it’s starting to become hard to really believe that’

The twits oh god the TWIST!!! The heartbreak it gave me, I was going to put some sentences in the highlights but honestly I almost ended up putting the entire scene so I gave in but it’s just so well written and nerve wracking to see what could have been and to realize that the friend that OC has been putting so much effort into helping betrayed her. Like, I can emphasis enough how much I cried reading this, considering I have been in a very similar situation, and that’s probably why this struck a chord so powerfully but wow.

The blowjob scene is simply another brilliant double meaning smut scene, the way OC is trying to regain control over something, someone, even if it’s not the one she wants, the way she makes him beg to hear compliments, heartbreaking (I know I’ve said this word like a million time and we’re just on chapter 2 but your writing really is something else)

The scene where she confronts Mijoo is in my opinion one of the BEST I have ever read, the way you can feel her heartbreak and her powerlessness but also the maturity she exudes, the way she tries to be the bigger person and do what’s right, lord I see myself here and it fucking hurts.

“He really likes you, Mijoo. Don’t let him slip away… You’ll only regret it.” The double meaning that applies to OC here is killing me

“On any other day, this is the kind of party you would protest, running around with a half dozen other of your feminist friends as you collect signatures for a boycott.” <3

“Wait… what makes you think that we’re supposed to be the hoes?” <3 <3

“Yeah. You really do.” Jk sometimes I really like you

“No, sweetheart. You’re the childish one for not being able to accept grown up emotions. Why is falling in love and caring for someone outside of their physical appearance so shameful to you? You need to grow the fuck up and realize that feeling for another human being does not make you weak.”<3 <3 <3

“Frat brothers are despicable…except this one, of course.” Absolutely love how first reading makes it sound like her crush is speaking and second reading shows her idealization of him here

“You swallow the lump in your throat. It would be one thing to see them wildly making out or grinding in the mosh pit like all the other horny kids. But to see them so enveloped in each other, content to just hug for the rest of the night… It hurts you more than you can express. You’d rather walk in on them fucking. This display of the purest affection… No one has ever held you like that before.You’re jealous. It’s shameful how horrendously jealous you are.”</3

“You need me?” you repeat in a small voice.” OC baby I get you I love you and you deserve th world ;(( </3

“You feel like such a villain, grilling this angel and making her upset. It’s such an irritating feeling, but you can’t choke it back.“It’s not like I liked him anyways…” Lord what have you done to my heart and I think it’s my favorite sentence in the entire story !

Chapter 3 :

OC protecting and looking out for Yerin is just so adorable I CAN’T

The discussion with Hyejin, the foreshadowing!!!!!!!

The way OC is self-aware and thinks JK only wants her body (and at the time it was highly likely) just makes the scene that much more heartbreaking, which makes me realize that all the smut scene up until now have been that way.

The entire chapter feels like a BIG call out to me thanks for that I guess. (I’m kidding it was wonderful and actually got me reflecting a lot on my habits and self deprecation)

“the ugly cage around your heart loosen a bit”

“Wow, your fungal cream is so nice. I hope you get that infection checked out." We love a considerate and caring man

“You would take this over the hollowness in your chest. You would gladly take the meaningless sex, the hard pounding of your pussy without a single gesture of affection. Who needs an emotional connection when you can have the pain beat out of you? Who needs someone to like you when you have someone to use you?” No words.

Chapter 4 :

I don’t know if I said that already but I just looooove the way you sprinkle hints here and here about everything ! Foreshadowing events and future revelations it’s just so nice to read and makes second (and third, and fourth) reading sooooo much more entraining and satisfying <3333. Like Oc and Mijoo are drunk and we get a snip at what happened freshman year, there were other hints previously but this just makes the reader WANT to know what the f* went down. And it makes up for Mijoo betrayal, it’s a nice way of explaining why OC « brushed » over her betrayal, we know that she was there in such a hard time for OC and yes it really builds the suspense around that whilst portraying Mijoo as more than the fake BFF who betrayed, I love that.

I love the way you use the word ‘ugly’ and how it’s very often associated with jealousy.

I want to address how much I adore your side characters and sub-plots. Like all of them are so likable (even Somin) and feel like genuine people with their own complex thoughts, seriously your characterization is out of this world! (special shout-out to Yoongi who is spot-ON imo). Like, I want to hangout with these people and be their friends.

ALso I feel like we are really starting to see Jk and OC’s chemistry (unrelated to being evil little matchmaker) and it’s SOOOOOO good, it feels so natural and seeing them slowly slide into a romantic relationship (don’t tell Jk) seems like the most natural thing (+ everyone thinking they are actually together and honestly they are)

"Hey so you like kick around a ball or whatever?" I love your humor I genuinely laughed at this

"Balls?" he says pointedly.” Same here

"Who are you talking about?" Jungkook asks in confusion, "I don't have a—ah you mean ___?" You sure didn’t think for long jk 👀👀and you didn’t even deny it 👀👀👀and you came as soon as being asked 👀👀👀👀👀👀sus

"Beats me," he whispers back, "I didn't even know we had a soccer team until this week!"LMAOOOOOOOOO

Chapter 5 :

The foreshadowing with Bang telling JK he is worried about his performance !! That’s why I love this fic so much! EVERYTHING is here, nothing happens out of the blue, you just have to pay attention to things to see things coming and not in a predictable but rather gratifying way.

The scene where OC hugs JK ? a masterpiece. I don’t know what more to say about it, it’s one of those things that touch on such a level that deconstructing it feels impossible and would break the spell, the intimacy I felt between the two of them and the stark contrast with Hyejin are perfect to characterize their relationship. Feels natural behind closed doors but lacking the words to clarify what they are, especially when faced with other people, and themselves. I L O V E it.

“you watch Taehyung roll around in the grass with his high-tech camera” don’t know why this is so funny to me but it is

"Are we not speaking the same language right now?!" Jungkook barks into the receiver, "Are you fucking high?" The fact that he barks it makes it even funnier

Chapter 6 :

Oc’s conversation with Taehyung about hookup culture (and her behavior at large) just SCREAM ‘I have had such a terrible experience with love before that I cannot even begin to think about letting it happen again otherwise I will never love again’ and it HURTS. But! The way she approaches things with such maturity and is so in touch with her feelings is simply admirable.

When OC is caught between Hoseok and JK at the party !!! It’s so frustrating but in the best way possible because they got soooo close to actually talking things out clearly and making things better but their pride and whatever got in the way and we know it! JK and Oc I love y’all but also you’re so stupid. (Also it’s exactly what I was talking about in my ‘misunderstanding each others’ part. I feel like this is during this chapter that they really start to fuck up the communication because that’s the chapter where it becomes abundantly clear that feeeeelings are starting to get into the mix, they both try to distract themselves (unconsciously or not) with someone else, HYejin and Hoseok, and miserably fails.

Also the domesticity!! That’s cute and fluffy and I’m blushing like I’m 12 year old again.

“You’re right, » he says « I have to get more creative” I have said that Taehyung is hands down the funniest character here ?

"I want someone to choose me," you admit in a small voice, "I want someone to fall for my personality—to love me because of my hot temper and annoying disobedience, not in spite of it. I want this person to be surrounded by prettier, nicer, sweeter girls, but still seek me out… I'd rather them fall for my personality first, then settle for superficial traits like my lacking appearance… Is that really too much to ask?" Once again, thanks for calling me out also I’m crying this is one of the best paragraphs you have written

“He's like a character from a 1950's romance novel stepped off the page” Oc sweetheart remember something else about the 50’s 👀👀 Like ... the sexism ?

“The moon is high in the sky at this point of night, not shrouded by dark clouds for once, and illuminating the entire rooftop with its luminous silvery gleam. But for some reason, it seems like all the moonlight concentrates into a single beam on Hoseok, surrounding him in a brilliant white halo. You swallow tightly and drop your gaze as though burned.” The imagery here is beautiful and I like that you associated him with the moon when he is usually the sun

"Oh, honey… You don't have to pretend to be strong in front of me." And there goes my heart.

"Did you think I was going to let her sleep on the streets or something?" is his sarcastic reply.You roll your eyes, "Thanks, Yoongi." We love character development (their friendship is so endearingly funny)

"Right… But um… what happened after the game on Saturday… uh…" A blush suddenly suffuses his cheeks, coloring his skin a lovely shade of rose, "I… I just wanted to—""Ah, that's right. There's another game next week," you hastily steer the conversation away, terrified by what he might say. "Don't worry, I'll be there too. I really need to start writing this article.""Oh, right… That's exactly what I was going to say," he says, awkwardly scratching the back of his head.” I want to slap some sense in these idiots’ heads

"Yeah, but the problem is that I don’t want to." I am S C R E E C H I N G

Chapter 7 :

The scene where they wake up together and he smiles and calls her pretty and the misunderstanding scene makes me want to slap them you belated idiots

SO MUCH things happen in this chapter and I think it’s one of my favorite!! I have to say that the scene where OC protests against the date auction and faces the resistance of her sorority hit close to home. It’s always so heartbreaking to see fellow girls complying to sexism.

Also also, feminist JK keeps me up at night. Fuck yeah. (You know the lisa simpson meme with the orange juice, that’s me with feminist JK, give me MORE of that.

Also, her performance : I C O N I C

"You're just exclusive fuck buddies… Even though you don't do casual sex and Jungkook doesn't do exclusive. It totally doesn't feel like you're hiding your feelings." My thought exactly Mijoo

“Staying so guarded might protect you from pain… But it'll also protect you from any happiness." *Slow clapping*

“Why would you go for someone who doesn't see your worth? You deserve to be with someone picks you out in a sea of people. Who likes you the best." 👀👀👀

"…Do not resuscitate… Got it," you solemnly note.” You’re so funnyykekzldk

“You aggressively bid from backstage, even as Taehyung motions for you to get lost” I laughed out loud at this

« sold » HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIJIfhehfqenfoneqlfnqdkfncqefnlmzfkbnrdbfksvm kjnefkenfe hAAAAH ????!!! flefnekf HIIII ç!!!!ç!uj

Chapter 8 :

I’m sorry there is not much commentary about this one but I can for the life of me read it with a critical eye since I’m too caught up in the suspense and the fact that a million things are happening, the only thing I can think about is that your fiction, although it is a college AU is so versatile and you touch on so many other genre (here : sport) and manage to successfully make every single one enthralling and further your plot!

“Maybe if I had lost, you would've hugged me again." HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIJZKELMLDIZPEKDLEBDLLDKKEJ

"Please, ___. Please don't go."But sheer panic flashes in his eyes when you attempt to shake him loose. "Don't leave me," he croaks out in desperation, "Please, ___. Don't leave me…"Not like she did." Don’t think I’m not seeing what you’re doing here 👀👀

Chapter 9 :

I feel high-key stupid because that’s like the 6th time I read New rules but I just realized that there might be a parallel going on between Jk and OC’s story, it’s obvious with the hints that you’ve sprinkled that something bad happened with JK’s past girlfriend but it’s just now re-reading Oc’s backstory with Jin that I realize that JK might have been in the ‘fucking around to get back/over his ex’ stage of his breakup like OC in the summer Freshman year, which led to him having his fuckboy reputation despite not ‘really’ being one (i.e. him saying that he hates hookup culture when Oc talks about her story)

Also, empathetic, feminist and understanding men make me w*t.

"Yes," he says, a smile tugging at his lips, "Yes, you did." I sEE YOU

"I don't know what goes through that fantastical imagination of yours” This might be my favorite line ever

“But you don't move one inch. Because you know Jungkook better than that.” Aaaawwwwwwww

Chapter 10 :

This is some greek tragedy shit right here. Mijoo trying to push OC and Jk because she feels guilty about JImin (she way you write it makes it seem so believable but I can’t decide if it’s true or not because we are seeing Oc’s perspective here and she knows she actually crushed on Jimin while Mijoo doesn’t, which would be a huge factor in her pushing OC towards JK) and also because she is the only one with a brain? Oc refusing to believe it and opposing semi-logical semi-bullshit arguments to convince Mijoo and even more herself that this isn’t happening because she heard JK talking to Hyejin ? Jk saying that because he’s an insecure asshole (and also very probably because of his ex girlfriend wink wink) whilst acting like the most belated man, ever ? Na a TRAGEDY!!!!!

Also, the entire speech that Mijoo gives, everything she says ???? A punch to the GUTS! ! !

THEY NEVER UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER THEY CONSTANTLY THINK THE WRONG THING I WANT TO TIE THEM TO A CHAIR AND FORCE THEM TO ACTUALLY COMMUNICATE THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (in a oh god HOW are they going to fix this and finally come to an understanding of each other kind of way)

He finally breathes when she says his name I’m :(((((((((

“it wasn’t fun” Love how this simple line implies that Mijoo and Jimin have problems and arguments of their own and makes them feel like human beings who have a life outside of the story.

“Or was your image of him so perfect and unrealistic that you couldn't tolerate these humanizing details?" Ouch!

"You're only pushing Jungkook on me to ease your guilt for stealing Jimin away from me!" I don’t have the words to explain the way I felt when I first read this line except : oh fuck. Goosebumps. Literal goosebumps.

"I like him," you abruptly confess, your soft voice breaking through the tense silence the same way the brilliant meteors abruptly burst across the darkness of night. "I like him so much." Masterpiece

“It's equally horrifying and an absolute relief to finally admit this deeply harbored secret after so long. After all these months of repression, it feels like a dam has burst with the way your emotions come tumbling out, threatening to choke you and sweep you underwater.” I said MASTERPIECE ! !

“Mijoo," you gasp, "What do I do?" Im crying. This isn’t a figure of speech. This isn’t an exaggeration. I’m crying. This entire scene is so powerful

“You know your role. You're just the side character—the best friend or comic relief. You have no right to even dream about a life by Jungkook's side—much less to feel this amount of pain and jealousy seeing him with another girl” .... talk about being relatable

“The loud electronic beat is pulsing through your veins with the same painful intensity of the tequila beating against the soft tissue of your brain. You feel like you’re being consumed by the powerful sensations… and yet, it's not enough to protect you from the helpless thoughts drifting across your mind, no matter how much you try to ward them back.” You really shine when it comes to making me cry

"Can't you just let me be petty and sulk for once?" Baby :(

“How could you have misinterpreted the situation so horrifically?” Well we have this saying in French that goes : love makes you fucking blind

“At this point of night, the moon has fully risen overhead, and its silvery rays cast down across the ocean, illuminating everything in white-gold. Awed, you can't help admiring the way the moonbeams kiss the top of Jungkook's black hair and the angles of his face, sheathing his figure like a cold halo.The waves continue to beat against the sandy beach like clockwork, and you sway with them, as though lost in a rhythmic dance lulled by the force of the moon. Your thundering pulse acts as a metronome in this dance, pounding away at a dozen beats per each drag across the shore. You are cold. So cold that you've lost all feeling in your hands and legs. But for some reason, you don't feel the need to shiver anymore.” <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

“Could it have possibly been a defense mechanism? Was he just trying to protect himself in advance?” We are making PROGRESS

"Why is everything about sex with you?" HE SAID! AS IF HE WANS’T ABOUT TO DO WHAT HE IS AVOUT TO DO AND MAKE IT ABOUT SEX I HATE THIS MF

Chapter 11 :

My heart is non existent.The way Oc swallows her feelings to protect Yerin and stands up for her ❤️

I want to thank you for introducing a gay character in your story also Yoongi is one of the most interesting character in the story.

The way everything is slowly coming to a conclusion and every piece of the puzzle settles in the right place is so damn satisfying UGH

The scene where OC confronts Jk is so fucking satisfying, a masterpiece, 10/10, everything I wanted to hear come out of her mouth, my girl knows what’s up and won’t let this fucker get away with it.

"I've told you since day one that I'm not that kind of guy. God, can you even imagine me in a relationship?" he says with a derisive snort that feels like a punch to your stomach, "Did you honestly think that you could trap me into one with sex, ___? Or with a kiss? Come on. Get real." Your insecurities are showing asshole

"I hope you get over this soon, ___," he tells you in a sincere tone, "So we can get back to the way things were." Fight me in a parking lot salopard de merde

“Well, at least you've learned your lesson now.” I had to take a pause after this part

"What if they were my parents?" he asks in a quiet voice, "My siblings? My community back home? The people I love most in this world? What would you have me do then?" As a closeted bisexual this one hit close to home

“But Yoongi turns to you with an incredulous look, "You can't be serious. Anyone with eyes could tell that Kook is completely whipped for you. Where is this coming from?” Yoongi is my man

"You're a fucking coward." My thoughts exactly

Chapter 12 :

Getting through this chapter without crying is genuinely hard..All the girls standing up for themselves and not taking shit for the shitty men in their lives ???? YES PLEAse. And thank you for not only that but also including the girls that the story pushed us not to like that much up until now like Hyejin and Somin when really they were going through the same things as the holy trinity of best girls OC, Mijoo and Yerin.

I have… mixed feelings and I feel like these feelings are exactly what OC has been feeling all along with the conflict between her beliefs and her heart. I wanted them to go through this and by being « willing » JK would have eventually just realized everything and stuff because I love romance and shit. But I also want OC to get what she deserves, and it’s not that. I want them to have this happy ever after end but I feel like we won’t get that before long because as Hyejin pointed out, JK clearly needs to grow the fuck up.

"Oh, ___," she sighs your name.” Don’t mind me I’ll be crying over there

“For a split second, you consider feigning ignorance. It would be so damn easy to laugh along with him and continue living this lie of being the cool, sporty tomboy who doesn't care about stupid "girly" things. After all, Hoseok isn't a bad guy. He's so handsome, popular, and kind. And he likes you. Someone actually likes you. Isn't that better than being alone? For a split second, you're tempted to grab his hand and flash him an award-winning smile. For a split second, you contemplate giving up all your morals and living a life of comfort with this lovely, charismatic man.” I love you so much for writing this

"Sexist?" he repeats in horror, "The fuck are you talking about?! I'm no sexist!" You’ve perfectly channeled the and OC’s entire speech to him should be taught in school

"We're just in different places right now," you inform him in a small voice, "It'll never work out, so please don't make this harder than it needs to be." I’m dying but also proud, producing

"I think I'll channel Somin and cut the toxicity out of my life." Attagirl

To wrap up this overly long review, I want to say thank you to Tayegi for writing this piece and feeling generous enough to share it with us, reading this story and seeing the plot unravel, characters be introduced and developed was a true privilege. I rarely connect with the « reader » in reader fics and just say a random name in my head (or even 'your name ») but here, here… Never have I been so close to actually feeling like I’m the one in the fiction, not for the romance but for the way she is portrayed, for her ideas and how hard it is to stand by them sometimes, for her past and traumas. New rules is a masterpiece, and the fact that I connected to it on such a personal level, which, arguably could cloud my judgement, doesn’t make it any less.

#BTS jungkook #jeon jungkook #jeongguk #jungkook #jk #bts fanfic #fanfic review #New rules #god I finally finished this #I feel strangely nostalgic because I read this ff when I was in a really bad place and it resonated with me on so many levels #like it brought me comfort and to finish this feels like closure even though it's not even finished #it's like finishing harry potter all over again gosh #please read it :(((#I never see Tayegi and her amazing work in people pic recs and like recommandations it makes so sad she is the most talented person #I have been a silent reader for too long it was my way of compensating for that #Tayegi if you're reading this tags don't stress over updating this isn't about making you post faster this is me thanking you

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fairy-eclipse · 2 years ago

Note

first of all i LOVE ue writing sm 😩💗 second of all can i request more hufflepuff!reader fic? maybe one where tom has a soft spot for her but pretended that he doesn't, maybe could also be in form of his fingers twitching when she's near coz he wants to hold her hand but NO why would he wanna hold ur hand dammit- unless- HAHA THANKS 🥺💗

Hand in Soiled Hand

Pairing: Tom Riddle x Hufflepuff!Reader

A/N: hihii sorry this took a while (；′⌒`) for the sake of the story we’re going to exaggerate splinching haha

“Destination, determination, deliberation.”

The words roll off your tongue like the recital of a sacred poem—over and over again, as if by some miracle the repetition might procure a key for the anxiety knotted around your throat. Pressed firmly against your nose and chest, the feeling is much too suffocating, locked entirely too tight for its far less grandiose cause.

Which, you’re a little ashamed to admit, is an Apparition lesson.

“Say that one more time and I will start muttering it in my sleep tonight," Tom admonishes wryly. "Besides, the course has yet to even commence. We’re rather early." He gestures to the jittery sixth years scattered throughout the Hall with a flourish. Somewhere between your stroll here and your arrival, the house tables have gone and reality has crept in with a vengeance. The capaciousness of the room does little to quell the feeling of somersaults multiplying in your stomach.

“You mean you haven’t been doing that?” You laugh, but the sound is strained even to your own ears. “Hey, what if something goes horribly awry?”

Tom shrugs offhandedly and gives you a pointed look. “You voluntarily enrolled for this. Nothing unpleasant will come of it if you follow the steps, and frankly I can’t see how anyone could fail in that regard.”

You shut your eyes. Okay, fair, but you had deemed it a good idea at the time; at least a much sounder one than Floo powder, convenience-wise. You should’ve known Tom wouldn’t share a fragment of your last minute doubts. The day he reaps anything less than an Outstanding on a paper, or loses a duel—something you can’t even begin to picture—is a cold day in Hell. Envy simmers beneath your skin.

You wrestle it down.

“It’s not that easy,” you mumble quietly, wincing as alarming images flash behind your eyelids in shades of red and horrifying angles of warp and curvature. “I’m not you, and I worry about the stakes. I could get splinched and…” You trail off and suppress a shiver.

When you open your eyes, Tom is absentmindedly twiddling his wand between deft fingers—which is odd considering he’s never been much of a fidgeter—and studying you with pinched brows like he’s carefully mulling over your words. His jaw is set in a way that you’ve taken to mean he’s either extremely peeved or…dangerously determined.

“You won’t.” Tom declares after a moment, such finality in his tone you’re almost inclined to believe him. “I’ll make—”

He glances down at his fingers. You catch the second realization dawns on his face, irritation written all over his scowl as he hastily tucks his wand into his sleeve and balls his hands into fists. You tilt your head in a silent question.

“Nothing,” Tom snaps. His voice rings clear even in the growing din. Faltering at the anguished look on your face, he pulls one of his classic Tom sighs™ you’ve grown all too familiar with.

“Quit brooding. You won’t splinch yourself—you have it on reliable authority that you’ve been mentally preparing way too long for that.” He smirks when you roll your eyes. “However…on the off chance that you do, I suppose I will,” he grows interested in a spot on the wall behind you, “visit you at the matron. Assuming I have time to.”

You break into an ear-splitting grin. It shouldn’t have taken a mere three sentences to soothe the calamitous sea you call your emotions, it really shouldn’t have, but suddenly you’re too happy to care. Tom compensating for your lack of self-assuredness? Tom promising to swing by provided you’re injured?

Good heavens.

A swarm of sweaty-faced students rush in with a commotion, greeted by the bell and the instructor’s disapproving cluck of the tongue. You swallow thickly.

Although the weight on your chest feels significantly lighter now, your pulse still thrums unsteadily—a trace of excitement laced in with the nerves this time, to your surprise. You roll your shoulders back and make to move closer to everyone else when something cold encases your hand.

Soft and grounding, you find yourself short-circuiting in your confusion before you even think of peering over your shoulder.

When you do, a pair of onyx eyes stare back.

“Wouldn’t want to lose you in the crowd,” Tom whispers, the ghost of a knowing smile lingering on his lips.

︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵

requests

taglist: @vi0letblu3s

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diamond-coral · 3 years ago

Text

A Game

Summary: Tony suggests a game that you, the unfortunate intern, get dragged right into the center of: who can make a woman cum the fastest?

Pairings: all dark!: Steve x Reader, Bucky x Reader, Thor x Reader, Sam Wilson x Reader, Tony x Reader, implied natasha x reader

Warnings: DUB-CON/NON-CON (oral: f-receiving, fingering, tiny smidge of analplay) VOYEURISM/EXHIBITIONISM, BLACKMAILING, OVERSTIMULATION. The characters in this story are NOT good people. After reading the warnings, your media consumption is your own responsibility!

As Stark’s party mellowed down and all the guests left, you, the unfortunate intern, were called over to the small group of five Avengers seated in a section of couches.

“Y/n, come!” Thor’s voice boomed.

“Y/n, come!” Sam mimicked, deepening his voice to make fun of Thor’s.

You approached them as the men snickered at Sam’s joke.

“What can I do for you?” you ask, a fake smile plastered on your face.

Stark cleared his throat and raised a brow at you; a silent command.

“What can I do for you, sir?”

“A round of drinks please, and add this to Sir Barnes, Sir Rogers, and I’s drinks.” Thor handed you the flask of his Asgardian liquor and you accepted it, hiding the slight nervous tremble of your hands.

“Of course, sir.”

“Someone’s been learning their manners,” Steve taunted, and it took all your restraint to not snarl at him.

“Easy there, Rogers,” Stark interjected, noticing how your fingers clenched Thor’s flask tighter. “Pretty sure Barnes fucked the brat outta her couple days ago when he came back from that shitshow of mission in Bosnia. Got a lot of pent up rage there, Buck?”

“Mission just put me in a bad mood,” Bucky shrugged. “Either way, I don’t think I fucked all the brat outta her. Got anything left for me, doll?”

“I have nothing for you, you self-righteous, ignorant prick,” you spat venomously.

“There she is. I always love a challenge.” Bucky smirked at how your knuckles were turning white around the flask. “Now didn’t Thor ask you to go fetch us some drinks?”

You huffed, opting to bite your tongue rather than lashing out, and spun on your heel toward the minibar.

Three-months ago, you would never have imagined your internship interview at S.H.I.E.L.D to bring you here. Your interview had been conducted by Captain America himself, and just as things began to look promising, it was interrupted by a sharp knock from Tony Stark. Tony had brought Steve into the hall, leaving the door to the conference room open, and you could only sneak glances through the window of the room, hearing Steve whisper about how it was “a question of morality” while they both kept looking back at you.

You got the position, and the next day, Tony sat you down and gave you an offer.

The Avengers needed to be ‘taken care of’, as he put it, and you being a ‘stress-reliever’ would boost morale around the team. Most of the them never had time for the outside world (apparently saving the world was a big commitment?) and were rarely ever able to make lasting relationships. You could accept the position, be compensated monthy, and get to live in the compound, or you could decline, and walk away with your mouth sealed by the confidentiality contract you signed before the interview. Something about S.H.I.E.L.D. work being linked to a lot of top secret information, meaning you weren’t allowed to speak any details of the job to outside parties unless you wanted to get sued for every penny you were worth.

You had been on the cusp of taking the second option before Tony mentioned your sister’s job as S.H.I.E.L.D. as an agent. She was half the reason you’d interviewed for an internship. A couple words from Tony about her possibly falling into a fatal accident on a mission, and you took the position offer in a heartbeat.

You almost overfilled the glass while getting lost in your train of thought. Setting down the bottle of expensive whiskey, you placed the last glass next to the others on the silver tray, and picked it up, gracefully yet begrudgingly making your way back to the small gathering.

“Y/n, finally. We were just talking about who here can make a woman cum the fastest.”

The complete utter bluntness of Tony’s words caught you entirely off guard, and you tripped over your own feet, stumbling in your high heels to keep the tray of drinks from falling before Sam reached an arm out to catch the tray and another arm to hold your hip and steady you.

You ripped yourself from Sam’s touch without acknowledging or thanking him, to disturbed by Tony’s previous words to do so. You began passing out the glasses of dark liquid. “And you’re telling me this why?” Your voice was flat in hopes of showing Tony you were completely disinterested in any plans he might have.

“Why, we need your aid, Lady Y/n,” Thor answered a little too cheerfully for your taste.

“I won’t be partaking in your little immature competition of toxic masculinity.” You crossed your arms and continued. “It makes it seem that women are nothing but prizes. Games to be played by boys as they fight over the highscore. Toys.”

“Aren’t they?” Steve cocked his head, eyes glimmering with amusement while a smirk painted his face. The rest of the men chuckled at his reply.

“I think HR would be shocked to hear that Captain America is being a sexist dick to a woman in the workplace,” you bit back, but your threat was weak and they all knew it.

“I think HR would be to busy writing a condolence letter to your sisters family if, let’s say, on her mission with Sam tomorrow in Russia, a stray bullet hit her,” Steve replied. A quick reminder at the stakes.

Sam clicked his tongue and shook his head in mock sympathy. “Those darn Russians and their careless aim.”

He abruptly pushed himself off the couch and clapped his hands together. “I wanna go first,” he declared.

“Just remember, you can’t use your dick,” Tony added. “Some of us don’t have super soldier serum enhanced fuckwands.”

“Please never, ever say fuckwand again,” Bucky said, scrunching up his nose. “Besides, the hydra serum didn’t do anything down there.” He waggled his eyebrows while elbowing his enhanced counterpart. “Don’t think I could say the same for this punk here though.”

Steve muttered a ‘shut up’ while the group snickered.

All while they compared sizes like a bunch of teenagers, Sam manhandled you onto the coffee table in the center of the couches. You let out a grunt as you were shoved onto your front, stomach pressed into the tabletop while your pelvis was slammed into the edge.

Sam kneeled behind you and brought up two fingers to your mouth.

“Get ‘em nice and wet for me, baby.”

The men around you went quiet, entranced as you reluctantly took Sam’s fingers into your mouth, sucking on them and swirling your tongue around them.

When Sam finally pulled them out, he looked back at Tony.

“You ready?” Sam asked.

Sam hiked the flowy skirt of your dress up your legs causing you to squirm and pathetically thrash; a desperate attempt at putting an abrupt stop to this stupid game.

“You’re on the clock.”

At Tony’s words, Sam immediately stopped your desperate attempt at worming away from him by catching you by the back of your neck and slamming you back down hard on the coffee table. Much to your disdain, the rough treatment made you wet, and that was the last thing you wanted them to see.

But when Sam pulled your lacy panties down, you could tell it was the first thing he noticed.

“Fuck babygirl, I didn’t need you lubing up my fingers, you’re already drenched,” he noted.

You let out a soft moan as Sam worked two calloused fingers into your pussy. Although they’re thick and long, they were nowhere near the size of his dick and you silently thanked whatever was out there that he wasn’t splitting you in half with it at the moment. Sam released the grip on your neck, moving to settle the hand on your ass before giving it a light squeeze and a slap that elicited another moan from you. While Sam slowly began moving his fingers- twisting, curling, and pumping them- he leaned over you, caging your body under his broad chest, to speak dirty words into your ear.

“Baby, you’re so wet right now, I think you like having them watch you.” Your cheeks burned in shame while he picked up the pace. “You want them to see how well-behaved you are for me? Want them to see how you come on my hand like a good little slut?” he cooed.

Slow pumps now turned to quick thrusts from his skilled fingers and Sam groaned as you fluttered around him.

“That’s it. You’re taking me perfectly.”

Twisting his wrist so his thumb could also strum your clit, Sam was moving so fast you’d easily mistake him for a superhuman.

“Yes, Sam, please,” you cried out, eyes rolling into the back of your head.

“Uh-uh, babygirl. Wrong word,” he scolded, although his pace never slowed as his fingers brutally fucked into you.

“Daddy!” you screamed. “I’m cumming!”

You chanted those words, cunt clamping down on his merciless fingers. He gave you no reprieve, mercilessly thrusting into you, until you squirted, your release coating his hand and dripping down his forearm. Only when you were almost crying, did he finally remove his hand from your abused cunt.

“Now that-,” Sam stated, grinning while he stood. “-is how you make a girl come.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever Birdbrain.” You don’t have any strength to look at Tony as he speaks. “Give her a couple minutes before whoever’s next.”

Whatever the conversation was between them (you couldn’t hear it over the buzzing in your brain), it was much too short to your liking. The few minutes Tony gave you only felt like a few seconds before Bucky was getting up.

“Guess I’ll take a crack at it,” he announced, rolling his head from side to side.

“No one says “take a crack at it” anymore, old man.”

“Keep talking when your in last place, Sam,” Bucky quipped, however, his tone was still light.

You felt a metal hand on your hip before you were rolled over onto your back, now facing Bucky while your eyes pleaded with him.

“Please dont,” you croaked.

Bucky just scoffed, kneeling down between your legs and wrapping both arms around your thighs as he pulled you closer.

“Tony?” His hot breath fanned your pussy as he spoke and you inhaled sharply at the feeling.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Stark said.

Bucky wasted no time the moment the words left Tony’s mouth. He started by licking up from your hole to clit over and over, the lazy stripes already driving you wild. Letting go of one of your thighs to bring his flesh hand to your pussy, he pulled the hood of your clit back, pausing his licking to blow on your engorged bud.

“Such a pretty pussy, doll,” he murmured before turning his head around and speaking louder. “You guys seeing this?”

He moved his head out of the way to showcase your glistening folds. A couple groans from the men on the couches had you trying to close your legs, but Bucky’s grip was like steel (especially considering his hand was metal).

“Wasting time Buck,” Steve commented and Bucky just rolled his eyes.

“I’m pretty sure I can still beat Sam and have time left over,” he scoffed.

Bucky directed his attention back to your folds, this time, diving in right away. He still had the hood of your clit pulled back as he encased the bud with his lips causing you to writhe at the intense sensation. And yet, you were held down with practically no effort as he methodically played with you. Each time he groaned against you, you let out an embarrassingly loud moan, and by the time he started sucking on your clit, you were wrecked. Your hand found home in his brown locks of hair while he quickly moved his tongue back and forward on your sensitive nub that was trapped in the vacuum of his mouth. The coil inside you wound tighter and tighter, and suddenly, while Bucky began shaking his head from side to side, it snapped. Your clit pulsed rapidly while encased in his hot mouth, and you screamed, legs locking around his head while your hand held his head in place. He worked you while you rode out your orgasm on his face until you could barely move.

Bucky got up from his knees, grinning down at you, so weak, you couldn’t muster it in you to glare back.

“Now I think I really fucked the brat out of you,” he said. “What was that?” He cupped his ear. “Did I hear a thank you sir?”

“Thank you, sir,” you whimpered weakly.

You were so fucked out, all the next events were but a blur.

Thor had feasted between your thighs the same as Bucky but was more sloppy, although, your body seemed to love ‘sloppy’. His tongue was constantly lashing and worming around your clit, the wet muscle accompanied by lewd slurping sounds, and in record time, Thor’s suckling and licking had you tensing and building up so much that your orgasm felt like a waterfall crashing over your body.

Steve was just as methodical and precise as Bucky, also pumping his fingers slowly in and out of your pussy. He was sweetly slow, dragging out your pleasure to the point where you were begging him to come. His warm tongue dragged across your sensitive cunt, while another hand reached up to grab a breast and pinch a nipple. You felt like your body was on fire. It wasn’t until Steve had inserted a thumb into your ass that he finally allowed your body sweet sweet release.

Your head span as finally collapsing on Tony’s floor, listening to the muffled voices above you.

You didn’t even register Stark’s words as he announced Thor had won and Steve had come in last. You barely even heard Steve’s defense that he was just enjoying himself too much in the moment.

Although ten-minutes later you had a somewhat sense of clarity, after hearing their conversation, you wished you were just unconscious. Even better, dead.

“I’m tellin’ you man, I made her squirt. She definitely came the hardest with me.” Sam’s voice rang.

“Dude- she was literally grinding against my face and holding me in a headlock with her legs,” Bucky argued.

“I literally made the brat beg to cum,” Steve inserted.

“I’d say that by bringing her to release the fastest, it was most intense with me,” Thor declared, victoriously.

You were on the brink of tears as they talked about you. Until another voice cut into the room. A female voice.

“What do you boys think you’re doing?”

It was Natasha. Your head jolted up as you felt a glimmer of hope surge through you.

That glimmer of hope was quickly extinguished at her next words.

“Not inviting me to the boy’s party?” she scolded. “You think a girl might beat you by a landslide?”

Nat squatted down next to you, running a soft hand on your cheek.

“Well you’re right. I’ll beat Thor’s record and cut it in half.”

She began unbuttoning her pants.

“And I’ll do it while riding her face.”

#sam wilson x reader #bucky barnes x reader #thor x reader #steve rogers x reader #dark!sam wilson #dark!steve rogers #dark!bucky x reader #dark!tony stark #dark!natasha x reader #dark!sam wilson x reader #dark!thor #dark!steve smut

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bunny-rambles · 3 years ago

Text

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“Accidents happen.”

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characters: Albedo, Klee (platonic), gn alchemist reader

notes: hi everyone, bunny here! This wasn’t a request but instead a little brainworm I got last night. This is my first original piece on this account so I hope you like it! I was feeling down and I needed some comfort, so I wrote this, enjoy! Likes, reblogs and comments are always appreciated! (о´∀`о)

Summary: You had been having a bad few days and the young spark knight was determined to make it better! Unfortunately, her bounciness and excitable personality made her more of a liability than a helping hand. Thankfully, the chalk prince finds a way to make it better.

CWTW: injuries (specifically burns and cuts), descriptions of panic attacks, but it’s mainly fluffy hurt/comfort. readers just having a very bad day,,, and it’s also pretty long

word count: 2.6k

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In the silent halls of Mondstat’s library, a young alchemist tries to obtain the unobtainable, and is disappointed when they cannot achieve it.

You sighed heavily, rubbing your temples to soothe the creeping migraine that was growing at the base of your skull. This was the fourth try and it still didn’t give you the reaction you wanted. And the procedure was so complicated, it took hours just to get the next result. You had been in here all day and you were starting to lose patience with this ‘little project’. The funny thing was, this was supposed to be a distraction from all the paperwork you needed to do. Truthfully, you were starting to think the mountains of forms and reports you needed to fill out might not be such a bad idea compared to… This.

“Y/N!!” The door burst open, shaking the fragile glass containers and liquid-filled vials with how hard the door had slammed into the wall. You heard the rush of tiny footsteps coming your way, coming to a stop right next to you.

“Hello, Klee… What brings you here?” You asked blandly, hoping if you sounded as boring as this experiment you were doing, she would turn tail and leave.

“Klee heard Y/N’s been here aalll day with nothing to do!” She huffed, placing her small hands on her hips with a pout. It wasn’t necessarily wrong, you had been stuck in here all day. And the day before that. And the day before that one too. You were so behind on work you had buried yourself in it to compensate, but each experiment you conducted were nothing but failures, or resulted in the same reactions or answers.

“Mhm…” You hummed quietly, eyes trained intently on the bubbling pot in front of you instead of looking at the child by your side. She gasped suddenly, which made you snap your gaze towards her. “Klee? Are you-“

“We should do something fun!” You heaved a sigh of relief, hand placed on your heart to soothe its rapid beating. She shouldn’t have been in here, and it was so easy for a girl her size to bump into something and get seriously injured. So when she made such a noise, you immediately jumped to the worst conclusion.

“Oh… Maybe later, Klee. I’m busy.”

“We could go fish blasting! I once caught a fish thiiissss big!” Her arms stretched out wide, and you could only watch in shock as the various bottles strewn around the large table started to fall off.

“LOOK OUT!” In a rush to protect the young spark knight, you pulled her head into your chest and wrapped your arms around her tight, holding your palm out to block out the light from the sudden explosion. Quickly, you covered her head with your lab coat and held your own nose as you led the two of you out of the room. When the door was shut, only then did you let her go.

“It… It was an accident…” The trembling girl next to you whispered, arms wrapped around one of your legs as she peered her head out to look at the closed door which hid the destruction of your room.

“Klee, are you alright?” You wasted no time, kneeling down to her level and checking her over. When you were finally satisfied with her appearance, and a confirmation from the small blonde herself, you stood up properly.

“Y/N! Your hand!” Your gaze trailed down to where your young companion had pointed to, wincing at the sight of your destroyed hand. You couldn’t feel it yet, mainly because of the adrenaline pumping through your veins, but you knew later it would hurt like hell. Your eyes then moved up to the small window on the door, and your shoulders slumped. Everything you had worked hard on was completely destroyed. All those notes, all that planning… Gone.

“I’m sorry… Klee didn’t mean i-“

“It’s all ruined…” You mumbled quietly, stepping away from the door slowly. You turned your head away, very quickly wiping your watery eyes with your uninjured hand. The young girl waits in silence, hands anxiously balled into fists. Even without her bombs, she managed to find herself in trouble. But the scolding never came. You knew yelling or telling her off wouldn’t have done anything, and all your energy had been spent on your project to truly feel angry about it. “Klee… Please just be more careful next time. You could’ve gotten really hurt.” Your voice sounded shaky but you were keeping it together, for her sake. To see you cry would’ve made her cry, and you didn’t want that. “Please don’t go back in there to clean up, it’s dangerous. Why don’t you go fish blasting?… I’m sure Kaeya is around. I need to be alone for a little while.” You forced a smile on your lips before sending her off with a small head pat. She tried to reach her small hand out to stop you, but you had already turned and walked off in the direction of your office.

—

Contrary to what you had suggested, Klee hadn’t gone to find Kaeya. For some reason, she wasn’t in the mood for fish blasting right now. Not after you looked so upset… The young spark knight wasn’t sure what to do. She couldn’t clean the mess up because you specifically had told her not to, and she didn’t want to make things even worse. What would her big brother do…? Wait a minute. Albedo would know exactly what to do! She began to grin with delight at the idea forming in her head. Luckily, Albedo had just come back from Dragonspine this morning and he was exactly where she thought he would be.

“Big brother!!” She called out, running towards the three alchemists that were gathered in front of the small alchemy stand.

“Mr. Albedo…” Sucrose timidly points behind his shoulder when he offers a confused hum in response, turning around to see a blur of red running towards him. He was already kneeling down to her height, arms open wide for the young girl, who gladly jumped in his arms. Her small arms wrapped tightly around his neck, giving him a small squeeze while his own arms held her close.

“What a lovely welcome back…” Albedo chuckled, carefully letting go of her, but he frowned when he saw the guilty expression on his younger sibling's face. He didn’t even need to ask what was wrong, because she was already confessing what she had done.

“Klee did something bad… And Y/N is sad… And Klee doesn’t know what to do to make it better.”

When she was done explaining what had happened, the two came up with a fooland bombproof plan to cheer up the defeated alchemist.

—

The scratches of a worn out quill echoed through the quiet room, the afternoon sun casting harsh rays of light down on the hunched over figure at their desk.

After you left Klee to her own devices, you decided it was best to do what you were putting off before: paperwork. Unfortunately, the hand you were writing with was currently shoddily bandaged, and in excruciating pain. Your trembling hands were struggling to even hold the feather, but somehow you were managing, up until now that is. The quill slipped from your fingertips for the third time in the past five minutes, but as you went to pick it up again, your unsteady hand knocked over the pot of ink beside you. The dark liquid spread across the pristine papers quickly as your hand scrambled to clean up the mess.

“No no no no… Come on…” You sighed heavily, lifting the stack up and placing them somewhere else before they got even more ruined. But there was no point. There was no salvaging them. This day just seemed to be getting worse and worse… Defeated, you buried your face in your arms on your desk, trying to take a few deep breaths to calm yourself, but the tightness in your upper half only began to grow worse. Thick tendrils felt like they were snaking around your throat, squeezing out every last breath until there was a painful emptiness in your chest. You choked, trying to fight back against the feeling, hot tears streaming down your cheeks. You only snapped out of your daze when you felt a hand set gently on top of your back. It rubbed it in soothing circles, and a smooth voice said your name quietly.

“Deep breaths, Y/N…” The disembodied voice commanded softly. You felt something lift your hand, pressing it into something firm. “Match with me.” And so you did. You followed the movements of the stranger's chest. In. Hold... Out. “Again.” In. Hold... Out. “That’s it… One more time, now.” In. Hold... Out.

Finally, the restricting feeling in your throat eased off, and your head became clear enough to see who exactly was guiding you through that.

Azure eyes bored into your own, and for a moment it was all that consumed you. Then the rest of that beautiful face came into view.

“Albedo…?”

He smiled at the sound of his name, and the hand that held yours to his chest tightened. Before he had the chance to say anything, you wrapped your arms around his neck tightly, face burying itself in his shoulder. You couldn’t help it. It had been weeks since either of you had seen each other, and for a moment, all the frustrations of the last few days melted away in his embrace. “I missed you so much…” You sniffled, on the verge of tears again for an entirely different reason.

“I missed you too…”

After a few moments of being in his arms, you finally pulled away enough to face him properly, but his eyes weren’t on you. Instead, they were fixated on the bandage on your hand, which he had begun to hold when you let go of him.

“Klee told me there was an accident… May I take a look?” Though his voice was calm and his face was blank, the look in his eyes told you he was incredibly concerned. You nodded slowly, and he took that as a signal to unwrap your hand. His face paled at the state of your injury, a large cut in the centre of your palm that was starting to blister with the untreated burns you had sustained.

“… One moment.” He stood up properly from where he was kneeling, exiting the room. You hadn’t really looked at it properly, so you weren’t exactly sure what he was seeing. You didn’t get a chance to, because he was already back with a first aid kit, pulling up a chair to your desk. He carefully took your hand once again in his own, in his other, some antibiotic ointment. “This will sting a bit… Apologies.” He murmured quietly before pressing the cloth that had the solution on it against your burns. You let out a yelp of pain, your free hand scrunching your hand into a tight fist, your knuckles already beginning to blanche white. Noticing your extreme discomfort, he carefully laid your hand down on the desk, and slipped his now free hand into your own.

“Keep your hand still, and if it brings you comfort, you can squeeze my hand if it gets too much.” That was the only warning you got before he was back to cleaning it again. You did squeeze, hard, but the chief alchemist didn’t seem to mind one bit as he did his best to properly treat your injured hand. He murmured soft, hushed apologies and reassurances, consisting of ‘it’s okay’s and ‘almost done’s.

“There, all finished.” He claimed after a few moments, and after adding some numbing cream so the pain wasn’t as severe as before. You flexed your injured hand carefully, surprised when you barely felt anything. You looked back towards the blonde who was sitting in front of you, who only smiled at the relieved expression on your face.

“Thank you, Bedo…” He shook his head, gathering up some fresh bandages to wrap your hand up with. He slowly let go of the hand holding his, placing it under your injured one while he worked.

“It’s the least I can do for you. Not too tight, is it?” You flexed your hand again to test the bandages, and shook your head at his question. Satisfied, he packed away the rest of the kit and put it somewhere where it wouldn’t cause a nuisance. When he sat down again, he once more held your uninjured hand with a small smile. Even though these weren’t the most pleasant circumstances to be meeting one another again, he always was comforted by your company alone. You squeezed his hand gently, your own smile forming on your lips. That was the confirmation he needed to know; your feelings were entirely mutual.

“Now… About what happened…”

—

After explaining your own version of events from the past few days, the two of you talked through your problems, and how such a scenario could be avoided in the future. It wasn’t wise to overwork yourself, but it wasn’t exactly like you could put off all of your work either. It wasn’t much, but both of you decided that Albedo would help you with your workload when he was not overly busy himself, and you would do the same for him. You were both talented alchemists, so it wouldn’t of been too hard, even if you both specialised in other areas. Perhaps you two could’ve learnt something from one another…

“Klee told me she’s very sorry about what happened.” The alchemist chuckled, sending an amused look your way, which resulted in your own quiet giggle.

“It’s fine… The lab was messy, anyway. I’m just glad I was the one that got hurt instead of her. I wouldn’t of been able to forgive myself if I let that happen…” A heavy sigh escaped your lips, eyes trailing down to your now properly bandaged hand. Another hand reached out to take it carefully, the other resting on top of your own.

“But it wasn’t all fine… You still got hurt.” You heard another sigh, this time not one of your own. Slowly, your hand lifted, and the chalk princes lips pressed gently against it. “Please… Start looking after yourself, too.”

It didn’t matter how long the two of you had been together, he still managed to make you a flustered, stuttering mess. But before you could even respond, your door opened. A small, blonde head peaked out from the door before Klee emerged properly from behind. She cleared her throat before placing what she was hiding behind her back on your desk.

“Klee is very sorry! Klee promises she will be more careful next time! So… Will you please forgive Klee?” It was rather adorable that she thought you were mad enough for her to apologise so earnestly. On your desk sat a large, messily chocolate frosted muffin, in white icing was an expertly drawn dodoco, underneath it a poorly spelled ‘Sory’.

You chuckled softly before kneeling down to her level, opening your arms with a wide grin. “Apology accepted.”

You heard a surprised gasp before you were tackled by the excitable red bundle, a happy ‘Yay’! being yelled out. You felt another pair of arms wrap around you from behind, feeling the comforting weight of Albedo’s chin resting on top of your head.

Even though this day certainly had not been the best, at least it ended well with your small, makeshift family. Maybe the storm had to come, before you could experience the euphoria of a rainbow.

#albedo x reader #albedo my beloved #albedo x gn reader #albedo x y/n #albedo x you #genshin x yn #genshin albedo #genshin x gn reader #genshin x reader #genshin x you

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sserpente · 3 years ago

Text

His every command

Synopsis: President Loki is hiring a campaign manager. Are you the right person for the job?

A/N: This is loosely based on an anon request I received quite a while back. Enjoy, everyone! ;-)

Words: 2488 Warnings: smut, highly dub-con, evil!Loki

This story contains themes that may be offensive and/or triggering for some readers. Please be aware that this is only a piece of fiction and make sure to heed the warnings before proceeding. For more information on the topic of dark themes, please refer to my FAQ.

Autumn brought change. You took a deep breath of the crisp air around you, the leaves on the pavement crunching under the soles of your boots as you made your way to the massive office complex towering into the sky in an attempt to battle the clouds.

There was a high chance that this way too lucrative job offer was a scam. Your application had been viewed almost immediately after submitting it and you had promptly been invited to an interview—but the promised salary had been too good to not take this opportunity. With your experience and chronically empty bank account, a job like this was just what you needed to ensure your very existence.

The smell of leather and new furniture filled your nostrils when you entered the building and headed straight towards the elevator to get to the twentieth floor. No time for fear of heights.

You’d had dozens of job interviews before. Landing an occupation wasn’t so easy anymore these days and it had taken you quite a while to not take it personally or question your own qualifications and worth. Instead, you now shrugged them off with a “your loss” attitude, doing your mental health a favour.

The silent ping of the elevator almost alarmed you. With sweaty hands and another deep breath, you made your way towards the imposing office with the large glass windows. The view was truly remarkable, New York City at its finest—even more so, however, was the man standing right in front of the desk with his back turned to you and his hands clasped behind as back. For now, all you could see of your potential boss were some shoulder-long raven hair.

But when he turned around, you were certain your heart skipped a beat. This man looked familiar. Far too familiar, he seemed… dangerously familiar. It was only then it clicked. The man who had published the vacancy. Laufeyson. Loki. Loki Laufeyson aka the guy who had attempted to take over the entire planet a few years back, he… he… was running for president?!

You had applied as a personal assistant and campaign manager for a “new presidential candidate” in the hopes of making some good money and this was the catch? Quite possibly, your life was in danger right now but then again… what if… what if he really was looking for a campaign manager? What if the salary expectations were real?

This was downright absurd. Who would vote for him, knowing that he tried to subjugate the whole population in the past? How would they not remember? You did, after all!

Your mind was racing and then, a mischievous smirk spread on his thin lips. “Ah… judging by the fear in your eyes, you do recognise me.” He paused when you said nothing, gesturing at the chair. “Please, have a seat. Time is money is what they say here on Midgard, is it not?” Loki purred. Too terrified of what would happen if you dared disobey him, you did as you were told, clutching your bag tightly just in case you had to run for your life any time soon.

“Now… judging by your resume, I take it you know how to run a successful campaign. As much as I dislike to admit it, I am fairly unfamiliar with Midgardian election customs.”

“Y-you… you want to run for president?” You finally choked out.

Loki winked at you, causing your heart to skip a beat.

“Indeed I do. Midgardian money won’t be the issue. I take it the salary I advertised is already beyond what the average mortal could offer you. I will make sure you receive a new wardrobe and that your time here is generously compensated. Whatever you need—be it sustenance or a ride home, I will take care of it.” His expression darkened a little. “But in return, I ask for your undying fidelity and your support in every way possible—and for you to obey my every command like a good subject, yes?” You shivered at the way he put stress on undying fidelity and my every command. And there was a huge part of you wailing and screaming at you to get yourself out of here.

Loki tilted his head. He looked outrageously handsome in that dark green suit, not to mention the tie. Unfortunately, that appeared to make him only all the more menacing.

“Now… I was told to ask you a series of irrelevant questions. Your strengths and weaknesses…” He sat down on the office chair behind his desk, eyeing you with a scrutinising look as he leaned forward. “Now that is quite redundant, don’t you think? I believe we should cut straight to the important questions. Convince me. How would you start this campaign?”

Scream. Get out of there. Withdraw your application… forget the money… so much money…

“W-well, first, I would, um… make people aware of you running. W-we could print flyers and posters and make badges… and… make the press aware of… of you.” You found yourself saying instead.

“Excellent. Then get started with that right away. You have my trust, little mortal. Do not disappoint me.”

So? Had it been worth it? You scoffed at yourself as you went through the paperwork managing Loki’s campaign had brought you so far. The badges had been quite the success, the posters indeed making the people aware of him. Soon, you got to contact the press for interviews and photoshoots and took care of publicity events and public appearances. And with every single day that passed, your fear of the mischievous god rose a little more. Only it wasn’t just the plain “I hope you won’t kill me” type of fear. It was more of a “I’m excited and terrified of what you could do to me and what power you hold over me at the same time” type of fear and that was what truly scared you.

Loki controlled every single one of your moves. He would randomly show up in your flat at ungodly times—and catch you coming out of the shower completely naked—with odd requests for his presidential campaign and he would not once take a No for an answer.

Your confidence had been rather low lately and you were about to do pretty much everything for the cash, if anything to ensure your existence, to keep your flat, pay your bills and buy food. Loki… President Loki paid you more than enough to give you this security, even if the working hours he demanded from you took a toll on your physical health. You were tired, exhausted, especially at night—and you never missed the curious looks he studied you with every now and then.

The sun had long disappeared behind the horizon tonight, the many streetlights of New York City your main source of light along with an LED table lamp in the corner a few feet away from where Loki’s imposing desk stood.

You suppressed a yawn, coughing dryly. You needed coffee. Actually, you’d be happy with just some water already. You did not dare ask him to call it a night and continue in the morning. Loki was obsessed. And apparently, this obsession included you. Today had not been in his favour. The journalists had bombarded him with questions even he with all his eloquence, elegance and charm had been unable to answer and then on top of that, his presidential opponents had mocked him for his horned helmet that had by now become his signature accessory—and he had known exactly that he couldn’t kill them. Yet, he had whispered in the elevator after you had quickly led him away from the tense situation.

Now, you could practically feel him smirking at you.

“Are you thirsty, little mortal? You should take a break,” he suddenly purred. “Come here.”

You froze, unable to respond. That was a new one. A glass of wine sat on his desk and as he leaned back in his comfortable leather chair with his legs spread, his blue eyes followed every single one of your movements. Maybe this was a test.

“I… I should finish this, Sir.” His blue eyes flashed, sending a warning shiver up and down your spine.

“Oh, indeed you should. Come here.” He repeated, more firmly this time. With a deep breath, you did as you were told and stood to approach him. Not quite knowing where he wanted you, you squealed when he pulled you on his lap so you came to straddle him.

“S-Sir…”

“I thought you were thirsty?”

“Uh… I am but I… I…”

Loki nodded, not bothering to show any interest in what you were struggling to say. He reached for his wine glass, taking a huge sip. You almost expected him to hand it to you then when suddenly, he grabbed a hold of your chin and brought your lips against his, forcing your jaw open so he could pour the wine into your mouth.

You swallowed both eagerly and horrified, the surprisingly sweet liquid a welcoming refreshment after working for so many hours and yet… his method of granting you this so-called break was highly concerning… and arousing.

Heavens, what was wrong with you? This man had murdered people! Surely, he would not hesitate to get rid of you as well if you failed to assist him any longer. Was this even about the money? Knowing that if you obeyed his every command, your bank account would thank you at the end of this month? Was it the fear of the consequences if you breached your contract and broke the promise you made to him? That you would serve him in every way possible? Paralysed, you witnessed him releasing your chin and giving you a wolfish grin. Every way possible. He couldn’t have possibly meant…

“Lean over the desk.”

“W-what?”

“I said… lean over the desk.”

“S-Sir… if it’s something I did…” Panic rose within you, the fear of what might happen battling your instinct to flee. But there was something else. There was excitement. There was arousal.

“I am not going to repeat myself again, little mortal.” He growled, his voice dark and threatening.

“But…” Loki gritted his teeth. With another menacing growl, he pushed you off his lap and wrapped his hand around the back of your neck to force you into the desired position and it was in that very moment you cursed yourself for wearing sweatpants today. He tore them straight off of you, quickly followed by your knickers. You could feel them pooling around your ankles, immobilising you should you try and make a run for it. Not that you could.

With the side of your face pressed helplessly against the cool wood, you whimpered, your attempts to regain control over your hands failing pathetically. Loki held both of your wrists tightly behind your back with his other hand, his grip forming bruises on your skin already. But the pain was nothing like the sensation you felt when he pushed your legs apart further, making you dangle off the edge pathetically.

Loki’s erection, still confined in his suit trousers, pressed against your butt cheeks, your heart beating so loud you feared he would hear it. Panting, your eyes widened when you heard him unzip his trousers, his length springing free and grazing your entrance. Your slick entrance. Fuck. This was turning you on! Were you crazy? Had you lost your mind? Had you burned yourself out? You had signed a deal with the devil… and it seemed it was too late to back out now. But did you even want to?

You shivered when Loki chuckled darkly when he noticed how you stilled, awaiting his next move in fear… and anticipation. Because there was this depraved part of you that wanted him to take you right here on his desk, high up in a skyscraper with the nightlights of New York City being your only witnesses.

“Not so reluctant now, are we?” He purred and, without any forewarning, sheathed himself inside your warmth. You were wet enough for it not to hurt and yet, the sudden intrusion made you cry out. Your walls stretched around him, accommodating to his girth all the while your heavy breathing turned into fearful… and lustful pants.

“Hmm… yes…” He gave you only a moment to get used to the feeling of him deep inside of you. He withdrew almost completely, with only the tip remaining inside before plunging back in, commencing with a fast and hard rhythm knocking all air from your body.

Your compromising position made it all the easier for him to hit all the pleasure spots hidden within you, his cock massaging your walls in a way you had had no idea it was even possible. When he sped up even more, you moaned with clenched fists, relishing the feeling of him railing you into oblivion and biting your lower lip upon realising that he was going to make you cum.

Loki’s grip around your wrists tightened. The nails of his free hand dug into your naked hip, keeping you still for him—not that you still wanted to escape. It felt good… too good.

“S-Sir …”

“What’s that, little mortal? Are you enjoying yourself?” He chuckled once more as he pounded into you, hunting his own release before caring about yours and making you moan when he thrust into you one last time, only to bury himself as deeply as he could. He stilled, his length jerking against your walls as he filled you up with his seed, grunting in an animalistic manner as he did.

But then, instead of helping you to your own high, he gave you a couple more lazy strokes and pulled out.

Your cunt was throbbing, your clit begging for attention—and you were dripping with his cum. You could feel it running down your inner thighs when you straightened yourself up at last, swallowing thickly.

Was he just going to leave you hanging like that? Arsehole!

“Hmm… I most certainly feel better now. You can go home. You should get some rest… for tomorrow.” You had just the faintest idea that he wasn’t talking about the workload on your desk. Silence.

Loki raised his eyebrows when you gaped at him with parted lips, not quite believing what had just happened.

“Is there a problem, little mortal?” He asked, his tone challenging. I dare you, it seemed to say. Shaking your head quickly, you clumsily reached for your sweatpants and knickers and pulled them back up, ignoring how Loki’s seed stained the soft fabric.

“Good. I see you tomorrow then. I expect you to be here on time. And bring me some of that coffee you had this morning.”

“Of course,” you stuttered. “Good night, Sir.” Who were you to object? You had agreed to obey his every command, after all.

A/N: If you enjoyed this story, I would appreciate it so much if you supported me on Kofi! ♥ ko-fi.com/sserpente Big hug!

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venusiangguk · 4 years ago

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hand-picked | jjk (m)

>>pairing: jungkook x reader / famous!jk x sex worker!oc

>>genre: strangers to lovers, smut, pwp, teaser, drabble

>>word count: 2.8k

>>warnings: glory hole au!!!, cocky jk, bad boy jk, stripper oc, sex work, sexual tension, awkward tension, hand job, blowjob, cumshot, cum on tits, pay for play, semi-anonymous sex, dirty talk, dishonesty... that’s it i think zzz

>>notes: if u don’t like sex workers ur ugly and i hate u 😌 also ty to @wheresmymoniat for betaing n helping me out, ily <3 *repost bc tag issues don’t mind me 🙄*

>>summary: glory holes weren’t a real thing... at least until you’re on your knees for a stranger, cock in your face, with nothing but a curtain between you.

Despite your nerves, you grasp the semi-hard cock in front of you, attached to a nameless person behind the curtain. For a moment you wonder what the hell you’re doing, but the soft sigh that you hear brings you back to the present. You stroke up and down, watching as he starts to become fully aroused. The foreskin rolls over the pink tip on every upstroke. You bite your lip. The silence is awkward, but you think maybe the whole situation is.

“So... what do you do? Like… not specifically of course, but are you an idol? An actor? You can be vague…”

Behind the curtain, Jeongguk, whom you don’t know the identity of, stiffens just a bit. Will his voice give him away? Maybe, but he was never one to turn down an opportunity to boast about himself and his achievements.

“I’ve done it all,” His voice is airy, softer than he would like, but your hand on his cock is speeding up, and so is his breathing. “I’m good at all of it too.”

You hum at the man’s response. Cocky. “Isn’t saying you’re good at a lot of things just another way of saying you’re not good enough at one thing? So you have to compensate by spreading yourself thin?” You gasp a small giggle when you feel the cock in your hand jump a little at your words. “Did you like that? It wasn’t meant to be degrading, but if that’s what you’re into-“

“It’s not- that.” He doesn’t know if he’s denying your psychoanalyzation, or your keen interpretation of the way his cock reacted to your psychoanalyzation but one was more inaccurate than the other. He actually was great at most everything he did, no need to overcompensate like you assumed.

Your small hand tightens, and you rub your thumb at the underside of the head, you let out a small pleased noise when you see a bead of precum well at the tip. “Really? You’re starting to leak a little.”

You sound amused and humorous and if Jeongguk had it in him he would be annoyed or even upset at the way you’re talking to him. You were basically hired help, a means to an end. He glances down his torso at his hard cock in your tiny, well-kept manicured hands. Your nails are a dark red, burgundy color. It complements your skin well, he thinks. He can’t see much of you, just your forearms, along with the bottom part of your tummy and your legs. You’re sitting on your knees between his spread out thighs, feet tucked under you. From the tight black leggings you’re wearing and the slim-fit long sleeve white crop top you have on, Jeongguk can tell you have a good figure. Your waist is tapered in, tiny and cinched, and your hips are wide enough to accentuate it, letting him know you’ve got a petite hourglass frame. You aren’t too skinny though, there’s a softness to your body that he likes. It’s not like he needed the tight fitting clothes to know what your body looked like, though. He’s already seen more of it than he is right now. His mind flashes to the club.

You may be hired help, but you were hand-picked by him.

“It’s just-“ He contemplates what to tell you and settles for, “It’s been a while.”

“Since?” You push. You hear footsteps outside and you hand stops, scared for some reason that you’ll get caught doing something bad. As if the door wasn’t locked and being guarded. Behind the black curtain, his hips lift just barely, urging you to keep going. Don’t stop.

“Since someone’s helped me.” Jeongguk’s head rolls back when your hand starts moving again. It’s been at least a few months since he’s gotten off with someone, his hand being his only companion. After the situation blew up even more than it had in months prior, his leash was tight. No wiggle room at all. He was suffocating and desperate. He almost cried when his team propositioned this arrangement, embarrassing as it was.

When he speaks, his voice is soft and everything is said with a sigh. He sounds so relieved, like it feels so good to be in your palm, like he’s been waiting for your hand on his cock forever. You blush, and right your thoughts. You don’t even know who he is or what he looks like. Still, you ask, “Does it feel good, do you like it?” Tone soft to match his.

Jeongguk nods and swallows thickly. Eyes still closed, letting the pleasure slowly work its way through his veins. Then he remembers you can’t see him. “Yeah.” He breathes.

You hum and keep up your ministrations. Not slow, but not fast either. You’re not quite sure what he likes yet, but the soft moans that flutter through the curtain at least let you know what you’re doing isn’t wrong.

“I like your hands,” He surprises you by saying. “They’re so small; soft,” A more vocal sound falls from his lips when you twist your hand on the upstroke. He’s chuckling when he says, “Kinda strokes my ego a little bit.”

You glance at the cock in your hand. It’s pretty. Thick and pink. A pleasant kind of heavy in your hand. The veins running over it are subtle enough to not be ugly or intimidating. The only intimidating thing about it is the size. He’s big. And you’re sure he already knows that.

You snort. “I don’t think you need that stroked.”

This makes him laugh a little harder. It’s a nice sound. “Yeah, you’re probably right,” He hums, you think you can hear a smile in his voice. It’s quiet again for just a moment before he says, “Will you- faster? Make your hand a little tighter too- yeah, like that.”

His hips sink into the chair when you comply with his requests before he’s bringing them back up, subtly thrusting into your palm. You fight back a moan; you shouldn’t be getting hot for someone you don’t even know right? This was strictly business. Still, you can’t help the slight shifting you do, squeezing your legs together for a little bit of pressure on your pussy.

Jeongguk notices. “Are you turned on?”

“No!” You squeak.

“You can touch yourself,” He offers.

“No!” You insist, “I-I’m fine.Thank you though.” You say dumbly.

He doesn’t say anything more, focuses on your hand on him, tugging just how he asked. His hand rubs over his stomach, flexing as he teases himself, his own light touches mixed with your strokes brings goosebumps over his skin. “Feels, so good.” He groans, eyes watching your hand under the curtain.

Encouraged, you bring your other hand up and massage lightly at his balls. They’re hairless, the only hair he has is the small trimmed patch above the base of his cock. He’s well kept and has good hygiene. That alone was attractive to you, stranger or not.

When you palm his balls, his legs spread as far as they can with his black cargo pants still around his calves, his big black stomper boots keeping them from being shed all the way. “Fuck,” He moans deep and loud for you. One of his hands comes down past the curtain and reaches for you before he quickly pulls it back. You think you saw a flash of ink on it, but you can’t be too sure, mind kind of fuzzy with poorly hidden arousal. The opposite hand comes into view, and your mouth parts in awe as he covers your own hand with his. It’s so much bigger than yours, completely enveloping it as he strokes himself off, using you in a way. Then again the whole arrangement was you both using each other.

“You’re mouth- put your mouth on it,” He sighs, pleasure just dripping from his lips. His cock is rock hard in both your hands, and you can tell he’s getting close.

You hesitate. “Will… will you be able to see me?”

Jeongguk comes out of his desire induced high a little bit and realizes what he said. He wants it, fuck does he want your mouth, but he probably should have asked. “No, no. I’ll lower the curtain a bit more if you want, and you don’t have to swallow. You don’t even have to suck it if you don’t want- like I know we have a thing going on but I would never like- force you I-“

He’s rambling a tad so you cut him off. “I want to, I think,” You whisper, taking in his intimidating size again, “I just- if I can’t know who you are, you can’t know who I am.” You blush feeling a little childish.

Jeongguk keeps the fact that he already knows what you look like and more or less who you are, at least on a surface level, to himself as he moves the curtain to the next lower notch, the bar resting just above his pelvis now. He can’t really see much of you at all anymore. “That’s fair, yeah, just-“ With your confirmation that you do in fact want to suck him off, he can’t keep the lustful neediness out of his voice, “Please.”

You take a deep breath as you wrap both of your hands around his cock, the tip still poking out the top. Tentatively you lick at his frenulum and the sound that comes from behind the curtain is obscene. His hips twitch and everything. You want to hear his noises, all of them, so you do it again. You flick your tongue fast over the most sensitive underpart of the head, before placing wet sucking kisses to the same area, almost making out with the tip of his cock.

“Oh my god-“ His body is pulled taut, and his hands are gripping the chair that he’s sitting in. “Fuck that’s- I love that.” He says, head dropping back, mouth open in a silent moan.

You moan against the tip of his cock, not able to hold yourself back anymore. Wrapping your lips around it, you take the head all the way into your wet, hot mouth, and suck. You lap up all the precum that leaked out, and point your tongue to play with the slit. The man behind the curtain is loud for you, letting you know just how good you’re making him feel. You get so lost in it that you don’t register him raising the curtain bar just enough for him to slip his hand past and push you off.

“S-sorry,” He says, panting, “I was about to cum.”

You make a small sound of confusion. “That’s okay, I can swallow- If you want me to.”

Jeongguk shakes his head behind the curtain. “No, I- I wanna watch… see your hands stroke me off.” His request is quiet but his cock pulses in your hand, needy and hot. Already begging for release, despite you not being at it for that long.

Wordlessly, you start stroking again, gathering the spit that’s on his tip to make the slide easier. It doesn’t take much time at all before his thighs are flexing and you can see the lower part of his abs tensing.

“Close,” He whispers.

Jeongguk watches as your tiny hands fly up and down his cock, grip tight just like he showed you. He’s doing his best to not fuck up into your hands, wanting to just rely on you and your movements, but it’s hard. Small eager little thrusts of his hips show you how ruined he is. And it’s just a handjob. He knows. If he was present enough he would probably be embarrassed by how angry and red his cock is, swollen and hot in your palm. And he’s just so wet, leaking all over the place making the strokes of your hand loud in the room.

He watches as you hunch over some, to where he can see everything below your neck, and your free hand comes up to your shirt. He sees you struggle a little bit as do your best to get the collar down under your bra, with only one hand before squeezing at your tits. “Do you want to cum on them?” You whisper.

“Fuck, please.” He whines high pitch and needy, all reservations out the window.

You hum, and work your arm faster over his cock, the rapid movements making your tits jiggle. “Do it, cum for me… cum all over my tits.”

You can’t see him, but Jeongguk’s face is lewd. Pleasure so apparent on his features, it almost looks painful. His eyebrows are furrowed, his mouth open, his cheeks flushed, and his eyes are wet and glassy, so overwhelmed by finally getting help after so long of cumming by himself. He’s chanting soft, pornographic yeah’s and yes’s until his whole body curls in on itself, you can see the way his legs tremble as he moans, “Fuck, I’m cumming.”

He forces himself to keep his eyes somewhat open, lidded and heavy with arousal, as he shoots all over your chest. You’re moaning with him behind the curtain as you work him through his orgasm, despite no physical pleasure being given to you, and that makes another small shot of cum dribble from his spent cock. You lean forward, careful of your identity, and wipe the leftover milky substance on your already soiled skin and black bra. You slap the slowly softening cock on them for good measure and Jeongguk groans.

You keep playing with his cock, not sure if he’s the type to like it or the kind that wants you off right after he finishes, but he winces and reaches his hand under after not too long, stopping you.

“Please,” He whines.

His voice is fucked out, and your pussy aches, needy and wet in your panties. “Oh, sorry…”

He laughs lightly. “No, no. Don’t say sorry… You’re like- so good.” Jeongguk sighs to himself out of your view. He’s leaning back in the chair, while running a hand through his sweaty hair. Little tremors of pleasure are still coursing through him, when he closes his eyes, blissed out, dazed and relaxed. Finally, after months of being pent up. “So, so good.” He murmurs softly, distractedly.

His hand that reached under the bar to grab yours to stop you, is lazily rubbing over the back of your hand, hold light and subconscious against his thigh. He probably doesn’t even know he’s doing it and you blush, shyly pulling your hand away. He doesn’t show any sign of even noticing and you both settle into a soft quiet, only your breaths sounding in the room.

“Um.” You say eloquently.

“Fuck sorry.” Jeongguk says, scooting the chair back to put his now soft cock away. He rolls his eyes to himself. Way to get stuck in the afterglow by himself with his flaccid cock in some girls face. “Let me get you a towel.”

“Should I put the blindfold back on?” You ask.

“Uh- Yeah.” He says stilted. This is weird. You just made him cum so hard he almost knocked out, and now he’s making you cover your eyes so you don’t figure out who he is.

You hear the hesitation in the man’s voice and assure him that it’s okay, while grabbing the blindfold you tucked into the waistband of your leggings. You knew how it went, you signed the papers. Patiently you wait until you hear him coming back and sense a soft moist towel being shoved under the bar. You blindly grab it with a soft, “Thanks.”

“I’ll go wait in the bathroom so you can- I don’t know…? Get ready to go I guess.” You hear his heavy boots retreat to the bathroom, that’s located on his side of the curtain, assuring that he wouldn’t be seeing you on his way.

With the blindfold off, you go about cleaning yourself. Your knees crack when you stand up after being sat on them for so long. Wincing, you run a hand through your long hair and walk over to the table where you left your bag. You leave the used rag in its place and you shoulder the purse. About to make your way to the door, you pause.

“I’m uh- leaving?” You yell unsure.

“Okay,” He yells back through the door. “Did you- did they- your- did they give you the-“ He stutters, not sure how to ask if you got paid.

The wad of cash in your purse is heavy. Figuratively and literally. “Yeah, they did.”

“Okay… Good. I’ll um see you next time?” He sounds hesitant and shy.

You laugh. “Yeah I guess so.” And with that, you make your way out of the hotel, thinking that he sounds a whole lot less entitled and cocky than he did when you first got there.

~~~

hiii guysss! thanks for reading this lil drabble! This is kind of like a teaser for a longer fic i have on the back burner (let me know if you like the concept and want me to continue!) but i wanted to post something because i havent for a few weeks bc i have been soo busy with school pls i want to cry 🥲 i should be doing maths as i post this lmao. ANYWAY! thanks again for reading, if u liked it, pls like, comment, reblog, or even send an ask! love talking to u guys n feedback is always lovely <3

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cloudenthusiast2 · 3 years ago

Text

To be a human - Scaramouche x reader - Part 4

You knew committing to a relationship with Scaramouche would be no easy task but you loved him dearly and unlike others, you believed he wasn't evil. But as a mortal and the devoted protector of your village you were too much of a good person, too much of a human compared to him and your differences slowly start to show.

Previous: Part 3 Next: Part 5

Length: ~1000 words

Trigger warnings: yelling

A.n.: Sorry I was a little late with this. But as a compensation it's really long! Here ya go, have some angst

You have been walking around in circles for almost twenty minutes in the kitchen when you finally decided you needed some fresh air.

You grabbed your spear - which was an essential to have even in times like this - and ran out of your home.

The house you lived in was built on a cliff so you could see everyone and everything well. Qingce with all of its beauty and treasures laid in front of you.

The first thing you noticed when you stepped out was the lack of agents.

The fatui has left the village.

Sudden pain stabbed into your heart. Before this all you felt was anger and confusion, but now... it's become official and somehow clearer too.

'What have I done?'

You covered your lips after these words tumbled out of your mouth. You desperately looked around, trying to find someone, trying to find a little shilouette with a ridiculous, huge hat...

But he was gone.

The only people standing around were the people of Qingce village. They tried to pretend they were just working or talking with each other but you could see them taking quick glances of you.

Finally one of them, an elderly, sick man you helped out multiple times looked directly up then started approaching your house.

You took a step back and realised you didn't want to talk to anyone at that moment. It didn't matter whether he wanted to thank you or ask what happened. You wanted and needed to be alone.

As rude as it may have been, you turned around and started walking in the opposite direction. Towards the huge mountains.

You escaped into the forest. Your steps became faster and faster - and suddenly you were running.

Loud gasping echoed in your head. Your hands were shaking, not being able to grab anything properly. A wet, itchy layer blurred your vision as you stumbled through bushes and rocks.

It was a miracle that you got up on the mountain in one piece. You didn't even know how you did it - in one moment you were still climbing and in the next you were standing on the cliff, looking down and being dazed by the height.

You came to this spot on days when you had nothing to do. You liked to write letters, sharpen your spear and most importantly, think everything through here.

For a minute, you were just standing there still, breathing in and out the chilly, fresh mountain air. The rough wind blew through your hair, lifting then letting it go. It fell down and covered your face. You slowly rose your hand and fixed it, staring into the distance.

The sun has reached the top of the sky. But it was still cold around you.

You had hoped the cool weather would be able to clear your mind but it helped nothing. Instead, it made you feel like you were breathing in nothing - like there was no oxygen in your chest at all.

You were suffocating.

Your lips opened to gasp for air but it felt like you were still drowning. Your legs started shaking and you immediately fell on your knees. This broke an invisible gate. Tears started streaming down your face.

He left...

Oh, how much you suddenly regretted your harsh, angry words. You could've just talked it out, you could've just explained it to him calmly...

But would he have really understood?

Loud screech as you clenched your teeth. You did everything to hold back the tears, but it was too late now, you had lost. You sobbed desperately, painfully, alone, in an abandoned top of mountain.

Scaramouche loudly slammed his hands on the table and there was no mercy in his ice-like eyes as he stared at the agents in front of him.

'How many times do I have to say this?! Don't start fights the Millelith! We already have diplomatic issues with Liuye Harbour because of that damn incompetent Tartaglia!'

'Apologies, my lord' a pyro agent bowed in front of him while the mirror maiden followed his example. 'We thought...'

'I couldn't care less about what you think' Scaramouche cut in enraged. 'Just follow your orders or I'll make sure you won't ever see the sun coming up again!'

Deep silence followed his words in the tent.

Scaramouche tossed his hat back to glare up at the agents. But they didn't dare look at him. They were always wary of the harbinger who was probably the most powerful and surely the most unpredictable among the Tsaritsa's followers. It wasn't hard to notice how angry he was that day as well.

The cicin mages in the camp were sure it was because of that Liuye girl but most of the agents refused to believe that. It seemed impossible that he would be so upset about splitting up with a mere mortal like you.

Scaramouche let out a deep sigh and closed his eyes for a moment to rest and think a little. He stood there silently with crossed arms and wrinkled brows.

The Millelith. A pain in the neck. How could they possibly avoid them while taking advantage of the small villages around Liuye? Villages who don't have protectors should be an easy prey...

He didn't even realise what a dangerous direction his thoughts were going. He just found himself thinking about you all of a sudden.

This was the hundredth time this day.

It's been almost a day since he turned his back on Qingce. He left the village without looking back, thinking he was free again and that he would be able to finally focus on his work.

But why were you still turning up in his thoughts over and over again? Why did he feel a constant knot in his throat? It didn't loosen, even when he yelled or coughed. He tried both multiple times.

He felt impatient. His body ached to move on, his mind tried to make big plans for the future...

But something in him still didn't want to think about anything or anyone other than you.

This was so stupid.

So unnecessary.

When did stupid humans become so important to him? He killed them off with handing out delusions not so long ago without any hesitation. It was the right thing to do. He never doubted that. Not even for a second.

You were so stupid to say otherwise! Why did you say otherwise?

For a weak moment, he tried to think from your perspective but even then, he understood nothing. All he could think of was that you were just crazy.

Humans deserve nothing. They born, they live so their superiors can make use of them.

You were no exception, he decided. It was ridiculous of him to even think you could be more than just a tool to him.

Why did he even start seeing you?

Memories started to emerge and they invaded his mind in a blink of an eye. And suddenly that weird feeling around his stomach started to strengthen again.

He remembered your smile, the playful and incredibly disrespectful way you greeted him when you two first met. He was out on a quest, alone but still recognisable. You knew he was a harbinger yet you acted like he was a regular mortal.

He hated Liuye. He got lost on his first day in the mountains and who knows what might have happened if you didn't run into him on your way back home.

After making fun of the fatui and its "clumsy" harbingers you offered to be his guide and that had to accepted even though he couldn't stand you at all. You were teasing him all the time, never taking him seriously. And most unforgivable of all, you messed around with his hat.

On the first day, he absolutely despised you.

On the second day, after you have dealt with multiple treasure hoarders without any of his help, he had to admit you were a pretty good fighter.

He was in denial on the third day. You picked violetgrass for him and put them in his pockets, claiming that they suited the boy. He threw them away in a second, getting ready to face your anger. Instead, he was shocked to see you laugh it off. You had... a not so horrible laugh.

Fourth day. Your smile was not that terrible either, he realised.

Day five was the day he saved your life. You were cllimging a mountain together when you saw a Qingxin and reached out to grab it.

He caught you by the arm in the last second. Called you stupid but couldn't hide his blush when you rewarded him with the beautiful, pale white flower.

Then the quest came to an end and he went back home.

Only a month or two have passed when the harbinger came back. He went directly to your door to tell you he will be seeing you. It was not a regular ask - he literally ordered you to go out with him.

No one could tell who was more surprised when you still said agreed to it.

You two were an odd, hard to manage couple but a powerful one.

You could've been happy.

Why does it... hurt so much?

'She's just a stupid human' Scaramouche told himself. The thousandth time that day. 'Completely... replacable.'

These were the words you were the most hurt about. But he tried not to care any more and repeated it to himself.

'Replacable.'

'My lord!'

Scaramouche flinched and looked up as if he had been dreaming all along.

He realised he had been standing there the whole time thinking about you while the agents did not leave yet.

'What is it?' He grunted loudly and all of his weird, almost sad feelings got replaced by anger again. 'What do you want?'

'Your order to stay away from the Millelith' the mirror maiden dared to speak. 'Does it apply to the Abbys as well?'

'The Abbys?' Scaramouche frowned. 'What business do we have with them?'

'It's just that we've recently stumbled upon them multiple times on our quests' she started to explain but the harbinger wasn't patient enough to listen to the whole story.

'Hurry up.'

'Yes, my lord.' The mirror maiden hesitated for a moment but when the pyro agent nodded to her she continued. 'We just think that they might about to target villages next.'

'What are you talking about?' Scaramouche growled at her. He couldn't stand still any more so he started walking around in the small tent.

'The Abbys gathered a lot of hilichurls and monsters together lately. We suspect they might attack a bigger village or town.'

Scaramouche stopped as if he got frozen in his place. The maiden continued to explain what kind of disadvantage that might be for them but he heard nothing of that.

He turned around slowly, barely being able to move his own body.

'What... places will they attack?' He asked in a hoarse voice.

'We can't be sure' the pyro agent answered. 'But Mingyun village is a possibility. And... Qingce probably as well.'

Scaramouche stared at the ground.

So many emotions. Most of them he couldn't even name since he has never felt them. The only familiar ones were anger, confusion... and fear.

Deep, overwhelming, terrible fear. It started in his stomach and slowly reached out to grab his throat with its icy fingers.

He opened his mouth but at first no understandable words left his lips.

'My lord...?'

'Get ready' he finally found his voice.

Scaramouche turned his back to them so he could hide the fact he was shaking. Something terrible froze everything inside him but the fire lighting up his eyes was burning hot when he said:

'We're going back to Qingce.'

#fun fact #Im sitting in the school restroom editing this #i stayed up all night to write and now Im horribly tired #and i have a long day #so please please go and comment if you liked this part or not and tell me about it #comments make my day #help and cheer up a sad little girl #cloudenthusiast #genshin impact #scaramouche genshin #genshin #genshin x reader #scaramouche angst #scaramouche #scaramouche x reader

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thefanbasewhore · 4 years ago

Text

“Mine.”

Summary: Din says goodbye to reader and Grogu but once they are reunited Din has mixed feels about the situation, jealous of Luke.

Warning/content: Angst, Jealous!Din, fighting between Din and Luke and reader and Din, Jedi!Reader. Din accuses reader of cheating. Nothing too spicey unless you guys would like a second part ? But would recommend 18+, Season 2 spoilers

Paring: Din Djarin/Female Reader

Master list. || Part 2.

There's a shift on tension in the room, it didn't go unnoticed much like the feeling of your own heart breaking. It's breaking for Grogu, for Din, your Mandolorian, who stands tall, strong despite the crushing feeling inside his chest. He's helmetless in a room full of people for the first time ever willingly, he does it for the boy, the child he loves.

It's the first time you see his face, his hair is messy but it's cute, brown in color with small ringlets that curl against the base of his neck, his eyes are expresso brown, smooth curve of his nose is small but prominent, lips pink and form the perfect pout, small hairs from his mustache curling across his top lip. He is so incredibly handsome, but your sorrow won't let you see that, there is no time to think about. The child presses a soft touch against his square jaw, in his own way of saying, "I see you."

This makes tears even well up in your own eyes as he looks over Din's shoulder, reaching out for you. The last thing you expect when Din head turns over his shoulder to look at you are the matching tears. It's hard to stop, squeezing his eyes shut as he bites his bottom lip, chewing at it nervously.

The two strides it takes to finally reach them is like the longest walk of your life, your head rests against the Mandalorian's chest piece as you take the small guy into your arms, squeezing him close. The sob that falls from your lips doesn't go unnoticed as Din presses his large, gloved hand to your back, rubbing it in comfort. "Be good, little one." It's whispered as you hold him cheek to cheek. "You're going to do so well."

"Don't be afraid." Din's fingers find the child, placing him on the ground, knowing well you wouldn't be able to.

Grogu's eyes met yours with confusion as the Jedi picks him up. There's an unknown feeling within you, almost like you can feel his sadness but also excitement of learning once again. It makes you worried as his eyes peer at you, head tilting to the side. He's trying to tell you something, but you just can't hear it.

It isn't strong, actually you like to think your connection to the force as a small, annoying dangling thread stuck to the bottom of someone's boot that is always there, no matter how much they pull or prod it just falls through fingers but then again you never had a chance to learn from anyone.

All eyes are on you, breaking from your trance like thought as to look up to meet Din's eyes then Luke's, realizing they were directed towards you. "Did you say something?"

"Are you coming too?" Luke's words make you confused, eyebrows narrowing with a frown. The thought alone is enough to feel a ball in your throat, despite the words you’ve spoken, his intensions were clear from the start.

“You need training too." Din's hand stiffens against your lower back, chest momentarily at a pause as he realizes what is happening. He knew about this, even though you were clueless of what the force is, you knew it was in you, had told him and Ashoka questioned it about it only days ago. Never had he thought he'd loose both of the people that mean the most to him on the same day, it was almost..unbearable. A pregnant silence falling between everyone, Din can’t speak, he pauses, words trembling in his throat as he looks to you with pouty eyes.

Eyes meet Din's, shaking your head pressing yourself deeper into his chest. A familiar place that was warm, safe, How could you ever leave him? "No, I'm staying here."

"Go." Din urges, the hand applying just enough pressure toward the Jedi, trying to explain his words, it was okay. His flushes his own forehead against yours as he tilts your face towards his own, kissing the hair line softly. "Don't let me stop you, you need training."

"But --."

"I'll see you again, I swear by it." He promises, hands cup your cheeks, bringing your lips to his own. Fresh, new tears slip past both of sets of eyes. Goodbyes were never easy but necessary, destiny has written it long ago and Din Djarin of all people knows that. The kiss is soft, but you can't seem to pull yourself away pressing a few more in their wake. The movement of his arms wrapping around your waist lifts your feet from the ground as he hugs you close. Lips tickle your ear as he whispers, "I'll see you soon sweet girl, don't forget how strong you are."

"I love you." It's the first time the words are said, while his heart squeezes in joy, but mouth dries at the words he's always wanted to hear, he wishes you never said them, it makes good bye so much harder.

"I love you." He answers back truthfully, using the back of his hand to wipe the sizzling trail of tears from his cheek as you step away. Grogu reaches out almost instantly for his mother, the familiarity is more comforting then the stranger’s arms. You follow the Jedi when reaching the loft and turn around waving at your Mandalorian one more time. Din can't find himself to return it, shoulders leaning forward compensating for the pain he feels in his heart. It's heavy, putting all of his trust into one man but at least you and Grogu had each other.

You are barely able to suppress the shriek that is mumbles against your lips as the base of Luke's foot comes in contact with your chest, pushing you from the advantage you finally gained. While you try to reach for him he’s too fast, too skilled as he swiftly moves from the counter attack.

"Ugh!" The sound ripples from your raw throat as the pair circle each other, waiting for the next move, lightsabers in the air, it's a waiting game. "Stop doing that it's not fair!"

"Why isn't it fair? You left it open. Do better."

You huff, "I have boobs! Well who knows anymore? After that."

The last few months have not only been the most terrifying of your life but also the most exciting, borderline exhilarating. At first it wasn’t noticeable, arms would ache for holding the saber in the air for a few minutes but with every passing day it became lighter and lighter until you moved with uttermost swiftness, the saber a feather in your hands. Never had you thought you would love to fight, being able to finally control the owner within. Luke had become family, taking you in and helping you. It has been quite difficult, Luke was a perfectionist at best, he was not happy unless everything was done right, which once made you sore and cry, but looking back at it now, you have mastered so much. The amount of long hours of sitting at the table trying to pass a stupid apple back and forth, learning to be silent, trying to sneak up on an opponent but now it’s easy, all thanks to Luke but still to this day you can't even look at an apple, let alone eat it.

Even though he is picky, you understand. He has made you strong, happy to learn about the very thing you understand nothing about. It’s safe to say you were ignorant, taking advantage of the gift given to you.

Luke rolls his eyes, the green saber retreating back into the canister as he tucks it back into his belt. "Training is done for now."

Your head tilts in understanding, tucking away the bright light until is clicks into the holder attached to your belt. There's a lingering silence, figuring it’s a silent dismissal turning to return home but Luke's voice stops you. "Padawan?"

"Yes Master?"

"I sent out word to your Mandolorian." The smile drops from your face almost instantly, serious eyes look over his own for the lie, for the joke as if he would break into laughter but he didn't. He's still as he gives a shy smile, you tense instantly, heart stuttering inside your chest, it must be a joke. Your about to curse, tell him it's not funny but he beats you to it. "I sent out days ago, he is due any day now."

"You're serious? It's not funny --."

"You have done well, you exceeded my expectations. You deserve to have some time off. You and Grogu, it's been months." You squeal excitedly, the smile crinkles eyes, almost hurts because it's been so long since you felt genuine happiness.

"Now come, the little one is waiting."

Dinner has to be your favorite time of the day, only because after the relief your aching body gets, sore, black and blue but strong, you’re capable of more than you’ve ever known to be. Luke always reminds you, never lets you falter, never lets you have the chance to doubt yourself, he’s always there to remind you much you’ve accomplished but there is always more to learn. He's a good master, fair but authoritative when need be, he's shown you so much but had given you so much more: a purpose, a friend.

With dinner came relief but also meant you could see Grogu, he hasn't grown much physically but the force has made him powerful, such a small creature to have so much but it is so different with him. While the force only touched you, it seems to run through Grogu's veins, it's so natural to him.

Luke is right next to you, sitting in the uncomfortable excuse of a chair but happy none the less as Grogu sits in the middle of the table in front of his plate with a coo, large black eyes peering up at his master, head tilting. "What's wrong little one?"

You don't need the force to feel what he's thinking, you communicated with this little guy way before all of this feeling though the force mumbo jumbo. The force was never needed to feel him, understand the boy. Reaching over to Luke's plate with a cheeky smile using your own fork to poke the potato. "He likes the hash."

Both of you are so occupied the hole of silence the hall falls into is unoticed, the heavy steps of boots that haunt your dreams. The Mandalorian seems so big in the hall, all the basker gives off the illusion of large broad shoulders, a thick trunk that matches the man underneath, he’s intimidating as eyes shift off him quickly to return back to their meal, no one would dare try a Mandalorian, even trained Jedi. Din eyes meet the back of your head, heart thumping in anticipation of seeing his love again. It's been seven months, seven agonizing, brutal months without his family. Any other man would go insane but this very moment is the reason he continued to fight, when he received the message from Luke he couldn’t believe it. Seven months with no communication, your voice haunted his dreams just wanting to hear it one more time.

But now, he feels his heart drop, his own body filling with dread, anxiety at the close proximity of you and the Jedi, faces inches away in conversation. The way small dimples pop through as you smile shyly at him, Luke's own laugh as he leans closer to Grogu.

The sight of him alone is enough to have Din choked up if it wasn't for the way Luke reached for your fork, feeding Grogu a few bites, whatever he didn't eat was taken into his own mouth. When his lips close around the fork Din's fist bunch at his sides, it was too intimate for teacher and student. That's his girl, his son he is feeding.

You do however notice how Luke's head turns in the direction behind you, but continue talking eyes narrowing to question why. He's not paying attention to your words only smiling, like he knows something you don’t. When there's no answer you decide to look yourself, at first you don't register that Din is only feet away, dead center of the hall. Head snaps back in a double take as anticipation makes your heart flutter, emotion fills your throat making it hard to speak, even move.

Feet register before your brain has the opportunity to, running towards him with a loud laugh of joy. He has to brace himself for the impact when you jump on him, a small 'ooof' leaving his lips as he catches the weight. Arms support you from under thighs, holding close as your legs tighten around his waist.

Your smile is wide, never ending the most as he holds the blushing skin of your cheek, the other hand on the underneath skin of your thighs holding you to the basker clad chest. Beautiful, absolutely breath taking. He's seen this in his dreams, reuniting with you but this is too real, the soft flesh expanding on his palm is too soft. The sight of you after so long is euphoric, its hard to breath with you so close, to concentrate on anything but the way your lips curl into a smile, eyes so lovingly with unshed tears. It's a relief to see you so alive and well, stronger under his own strength but as soft he remembers.

"I missed you Cyar'ika." It's breathlessly whispered into the vocoder, static chokes his words but it may be the tremble in his throat as a hand knots into hair to pull you closer.

"Oh." You mumble under your breath with as realize the stares that follow you, quickly you lower your feet to the ground but your hand never leaves his forearm, clenching the underneath, tunic crumpling in your hands. Now that he's here you never want to let go. "Come see Grogu."

Din can't even get a word out as he's pulled towards the table, he nods, acknowledging Luke despite the tension he manifests. The reunion warms your heart, it makes it harder not to crying as you feel Grogu's emotions run through you. He feels love.. he's excited extending his arms with grapy hands.

With no hesitation the child is once again reunited with the basker clad man.. his truthful father. It's a sigh of relief that falls from Din that makes you smile up at him. Din reaches over with his free hand, cupping your cheek. No words were said, not in the presence of a stranger but it's shown in the way his thumb moves across the smooth skin of your cheek.

The moment he entered the room darkness cascades over them, small, familiar hands press against the the basker that covers his head, a silent ask for permission. "Cyar'ika, it's --."

"I can't believe you're here, I missed you so much love." Din's eyes close so tightly at the words, he doesn't want to stop you. He wants to feel your skin pressed against his, he swears he's almost knocked off his feet when the helmet falls to the ground with a loud thump lips brusingly hard against his own.

"Sweet -." He tries to speak against but is met with the softness again, tongue seeking permission against his bottom lip.

"Missed you." Lips press against his jaw, following to his neck sucking softly on the smooth skin. A small, choked moan falls from his lips as you nip at the junction between his clavicle and throat.

The feeling of welted skin has you raising your head up in confusion, fingers taking place of your lips to feel the healing skin. It's not a scar or a wound but purposely put there, as you trace it with your fingers you begin to paint a small picture with the raised lines.

"It's a symbol of leadership along my people." He answers, hands reaching up to gently wrap around your wrist, bringing it to press against his cheek. His next words almost as unexpected as learning he has a new tattoo on his neck. "Would you like to see it?"

"But the creed.." you mumble, eyes roaming over the slightest curve of his face the darkness of allows as he pushes you to straddle his lap, his other hand running over the expanding skin of your thigh.

"It's nothing you haven't seen before my love." He's referring to the moment before you and the child left him, kissing him goodbye. "The creed is broken but I am a Mandalorian, nothing will change that."

"But, I ugh." The words are not of the man you knew almost a year ago, but show maturity, experience has formed him into a new person but nonetheless he still is yours.

It's just dawned on you now, while you were growing with power was so was Din. The lightsaber pressing against your outer thigh reminded you of it, while you have gained one, Din had ruled with one. Every new experience, lesson, moments spent crying Din has had similar, except his people depend on him for survival.

"Oh my God." You mumble under your breath, eyes widening in shock. His words, the tattoo meaning, the new signet pressed into his chest, the thicker tunic decorated with a gold pattern, you were so busy just concentrating the fact he was here, you never bothered to look at the changes, the clues. Two large horns soldered into his helmet you never noticed until now poke against your ankle. "You actually did it? I though you didn't want it."

"It's my responsibility to my people to get our home back. Once you left I had nothing but them, Bo-Katan has been helping me. We are so close Cyar'ika." Din presses his forehead against the skin of your shoulder, breathing deeply. "I can't wait to show you."

"So close to what?"

"Not hiding anymore, to regaining Mandalore." The words make your skin warm, a soft smile filled with admiration, proudness. "I'm building a home for us."

"You have changed Din."

"So have you Cyare. You look so well, feel so strong. You are where you’ve always belonged." He is right, there's something that changes in the air when you are nearby now; a power that follows you, makes everyone fear the presence but he loves it. "I wish I could have been here to see it. I dream of when we will be together again."

"Can I see?" The words are unsure, despite his earlier words old habits die hard, promising never to look unless he wants it, it was his choice, never yours.

"Please." It's soft, tender as you shakily wobble on legs to walk across the room, fingers ghost over the switch before a loud knock against the door makes even Din's stomach drop.

"Padawan?" Luke's voice makes Din scowl, what is it with this guy?

"Yes Master?" The way you answer so quickly with little regard towards Din has him swollowing loudly, jealousy searing his veins, it makes his forehead hot.

"While I have promised you a break the day is still not over, training will continue."

"Be right out." It's quick, the kiss pressed against his lips, it has him reaching out to hold you again but you already out the door leaving him gritting his teeth.

When he finds you again it almost an hour of looking for you. He's irritated, it shows in the way he walks, tall and intimidating with every crunch of sand under his boots.

Despite it being evening the sun is still blaring, it's too hot for anything but he manages to power through, though taking off the helmet is an option if is his only line of defense when it comes to be surrounded by Jedis.

It's an odd sight, you're legs are crossed as Grogu sits feet in front of you. Eyelashes fluttering in concentration, frustration clear in the way the junction between your eye brow wrinkles. It's magical, the way the large rock moves across the length of the pair. It's amazing truly, he's watched the kid do it many times but with you, it's different, seven months ago you could barely hold a blaster let alone do this.

He was in complete awe, watching as Grogu takes the rock himself but to him it's effortless. He doesn't even bat an eye as the rock moves higher and higher until it's explodes. The small pieces shoot towards him, the rocks dink against his helmet knocking him forward that he doesn't give you enough time to warn you that there's someone behind you, he feels himself jump forward to protect but natural reflexes already have you up, your own blue saber flashes with Luke's green one.

It's a relief it's only him but also makes him want to longue and wrap his hands around his throat for even trying to attack you, it's instincts, his own will to protect his family. He was so caught up with his own anger, he didn't notice the small hands tugging at his pant leg.

"Hey buddy." It's the soft coo that warms his heart, the sound he missed so late at night, all by himself. It feels so right to have him in his arms again, it's a distraction for a moment, but the loud shriek that mumbles against your lips as the saber slices your arm breaks the moment.

Din stalks toward without hesitation, hands reaching out to pull Luke by his collar but hand stops half way there; a choking sound falling from his lips as he feels his throat start to close.

"Luke!" You exclaim, hands pulling on his shoulder. "Stop!"

Luke doesn't listen, tilts his head as the Mandalorian's other hand reaches for his own neck, the child falls from his arms but Luke reaches for Grogu as he floats towards him and that is when he decides to let go of his hold on Din.

"She is fine." Luke's tone is accusing, eyes lit up in anger. He knew the reasoning behind the Mandalorian's attack but it irritates him. Din falls to the ground into his knees as he coughs, lung begging for air. "She will heal, it's no wonder she was afraid of the force. You made her feel as if she was weak. Couldn't protect herself. Can't you see she is strong?"

The words sting a bit, you never felt like that with Din but the words of your master, where they true? Had he been the reason you never felt the force like this before? It’s not his fault, he’s always been a protector.

"Yes." Din chokes on the words, it's surprises Luke how quickly he recovers, leaning on knees, visor tilting up to meet his gaze. "I do, I don't need you telling me either Jedi."

The last word is spoken with gritted teeth, disgust as he stands, squaring up the man in front of him, pressing the top of his basker against Luke’s face.

"Then do her a favor and never, ever underestimate her again." Din doesn't like what the Jedi is insinuating, hands balling in fist, finger coming to poke the Jedi's chest as he speaks. "Respect her Mandalorian."

"I do." You're about to squeeze between the two men but Din speaks too fast. "I don't need any magic tricks to beat your ass either."

"Din!" You hiss, the helmet pointing in your direction as a growl admits his chest.

"You're sticking up for him?!" Then once again you're minded how immature Din Djarin can really be. He's protective, overbearing but you expect more from Luke as he speaks. "You're just taking out the fact that Grogu and the girl are in my care, they are with me."

"My son, my girl." Then it hit you, all so sudden he wasn't an asshole, maybe a little immature, but he was jealous. The growl that rumbled his chest made even you shake. You couldn't find yourself to blame him either, both of the people he's ever cared for pulled from his arms, seven months spent with Luke. It made him insecure, dear the worst.

"Enough!" A hand presses against each other their chests, meeting Luke's first. Eyes warn him, "I expect more from you."

Then they move to Din with a scowl, "And you have no reason to be like this, Luke is my friend. He is helping me! I am strong now because of him."

"You have always been strong." The words make you pause, heart dropping. Guilt dropping your shoulders instantly. "You never needed to hold a lightsaber for me to see that."

A strong, confident finger lifts lifts towards Luke's direction, it looks like he's going to say something else judging by his stance, looks over you one more time then Grogu before stalking away towards the direction of the hall.

It's only an hour later, and Din is no where to be found. Luke has told you he's taken the child for a little bit, you can only imagine how that exchange went but respectfully allow him to have time with him, besides you doubt he wants to see you right now.

He was right, it was a force of habit trying to protect you but he has never doubted or hesitated for one second when it came to you. There has only been one person who has ever believed that anything was possible for you and it's the one you managed to chase away.

The room is dark, the only light comes from the gasps of the curtains the moon allows in. You have given up on waiting on the bed, instead curl up on the large longue chair in the corner, book open but you wouldn't even notice if there weren't any words. Too deep in thought over your Mandalorian.

What If he leaves without seeing you? Surely, he wouldn't, it was stupid fight, it shouldn't have happened but you shouldn't have accused him either. The rattling of the door knob makes you pause, daring not to breath that it might scare him away. He's quiet as the silhouette of armour makes it through the doorway, shiny, the darkness of his visor camouflaging him throughout the door.

The light flickers on, you want to squeeze your eyes shut, away from his gaze out of fear he might leave again seeing that you aren’t sleeping, waiting for him.

He doesn't speak, only stiffens his stance, arms crossing his chest as the helmet tilts down in your direction. "What are you doing?"

"Reading."

"In the dark?" You have been caught there's no reason to argue with him just turn a dark shade of pink as the book is closed with a loud echo. Tension fills the air, you're torn between apologizing and expect one first, his behavior was inappropriate.

"Are you happy here?" It's surprising watching the Mandalorian walk close until he's between the V of your legs, a soft breath caught through the static as he uses your thighs as an anchor for his hands as he slowly lowers to the floor in front of you. His force his horse as leans over, pressure pressed against your chin, it's not enough to hurt but enough to show he is angry. "Is there someone here making you happy? That isn't me?"

You don't like what he's insinuating, brow furrow with a deep frown and a scoff, "If you have something to ask I suggest you come out with it Din."

"Are you fucking him?" The words make you huff, pushing the warmth of his skin away but he reaches out to touch you again. He wants you to look at him, he wants to see the truth your eyes will tell.

The fucking nerve he has to knot his fingers into your hair, keep your head still as the visor moves up and down the soft features of your face, it's soft but shows meaning. At this very moment you here the way your body reacts to him, wanting to move closer, wrap the other hand around your neck at his tone, the authority in his voice. "I asked you a question."

"Really?" The way he stares just irritates you. Spending all your nights longing for him, all the tears wasted on missing him just for him to believe you were unfaithful. "I can't believe you just asked me that."

"Don't act like it's all me! I can see it, you sit so close that you're practically on his lap. He ate from your fork. He comes to your aid like I don't know you can take care of yourself, tells me of all people to respect you, never undermine you. When have I ever? He seems to forget that I was the person who first trained you. So, I'm going to ask you one more time. Are you fucking the Jedi? Do you like him?"

"Get out of my face Din!" The heat of his visor, the blackness hides any kind of emotion, all you see is the anger that comes from his throat, words stinging cheeks. It's impossible to concentrate with him so close, pressing his entire weight against your thighs.

"Tell me now." The words harsh, he needs to know, hear the words from your lips to know they are true.

"No! How dare you even accuse me of that? I have been waiting for months to see you again and you accuse me of being unfaithful?" The tears sting, almost hurt as much as knowing Din has little trust in you. His chest is raising fast, deep, quick breaths against your knee, showing just how worked up he is, he's frustrated, the throbbing in his pants gives that away and makes you think if there’s a different reason. He's insecure, jealous, absolutely pissed.

The harsh fingers leave your hair only to meet the edge of his helmet, you don't even get time to register before it falls to the floor next to you. Seeing is face is.. different this time.

It's clear, the first time was rushed, tear filled but now he look so.. good.

His brows furrowed in anger, nostrils flaring, hair thrown messily across his forehead, you don't even get time to look at his lips before his hands touch your cheeks pulling you into a bruising kiss, fingers nails forming small crescents on hips as the words are moaned against your lips, rushed with how desperate the Mandalorian is.

"You are mine." It's not the words that make you gasp but the hand that tugs the tips of your hair, pulling your head down more to accept his crushing lips. "Mine."

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