#I have a ref for this I just can’t find it…
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GET HIS ASS
#Jean is about to break a pillow over Harry lmao…#god I love and miss them.#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#jean vicquemare#I have a ref for this I just can’t find it…#I’m sure if I typed in ‘pillow fight meme’ it would pop right up#but alas I am so tired…going back to bed for a moment lmao..
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What a loser /pos
Close ups under the cut!
#been absolutely exhausted lately I haven’t been able to make a full piece just for myself in 1000 years#I only have the energy to doodle if I’m drawing for myself these days#also don’t even ask me about the red robin costume ok I don’t get it either#it has a look somewhere in my brain I just don’t have the energy to draw it#my art#doodle#tim drake#red robin#dc#what does zesti look like?? I don’t know#can’t be bothered to search hard enough to find a ref#he would put orange juice in his cereal unironically cause I said so#he would have bat themed socks#he would wear his ex’s superhero merch
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Looped Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother for three hours and now there’s guys
#just me#look I drew a thing#ballad brothers#Kyrie Ballad#(x5)#Alonzo Ballad#(x4)#Ari Finch#(x4 again)#fun fact the finch family portrait is reffed off of my great great grandparents and my little sister#Alonzo diagnosed guy who’s so low-level pissed off all the time but has the biggest wettest eyes imaginable#I don’t have anything to say about Kyrie I just think it’s Neat when women have stubble#did I already post this#I thought I posted it last night but I can’t find it
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being fat is fun and all but also a nightmare for drawing. majority of my characters are not obese like i am (for a myriad of reasons, not cuz i hate fat people or something lmao) so when i take my own reference pics, the drawings don’t always come out well cuz i’m having to imagine what a skinnier body would look like doing the pose i’ve chosen
#and also i can’t always find the right pose refs online#just kind of really annoying…#same w the face too. a lot of my ocs don’t have the same face as me#so it’s hard to use my own face as a base#don’t even bring up 3D programs idk how those work#gee.txt
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Tim calls a family meeting and everyone is assuming he’s got a big case he needs help with, which is alarming for someone who refuses to admit that some cases are beyond him.
So, everyone shows up at the cave only to be ordered upstairs by Alfred. For those who only showed up to make fun of Tim for needing help, this is confusing because case work ain’t allowed upstairs.
All do them figure out quickly that this means it’s not to do with Gotham or Ref Robin, but the man behind the mask.
Bruce and Dick were there first and because Damian is always with one of them, so is he.
Steph picks up Barbara and Cass, with Duke already at home and Jason showing up at the same time as Kate and Lucius.
When they all get into the lounge room used for when people are over, just two doors down from the actual family room, they all find themselves chatting casually as they stave off their own worries or confusion. Some of them try find out if anyone knows what’s going on, but when Alfred and Barbara reveal they have no idea, they give up and make a few guesses but no more.
When Tim finally comes in after Alfred received him, he looks tired.
It’s not usual for Tim to get distracted with work and not sleep for a while, but he will conk out for hours when he decides to and wake up alright.
The bags under his eyes, the redness within them, and the way he looks close to tucking himself into a ball…
Bruce is immediately leaning forward, opening his mouth to make sure his son is okay but Tim just raised a hand to silence him. “Just… just let me speak, okay? I need to do it now or I’m not going to be able to.”
Everyone gives him a nod or look of understanding, making him twitch a smile before inhaling deeply and psyching himself up.
“I have cancer.”
…
Nobody speaks as Tim exhales shakily.
Everyone is staring wide eyed at the young man before them, who just reached the legal drinking age, and trying to asses his physical form for an understanding of what he just said. They’re all trying to gain X-ray vision to see exactly what is hurting him all while trying to convince themselves they heard him wrong.
Tim closes his eyes and speaks automatically, leaning into facts like he always does when he’s freaking out, “I noticed I was getting by more tired and fatigued around last year. My doctor said I have a low white cell count but he wasn’t alarmed as it was still in the normal range. But a few months ago I started to note that bruises were taking far too long to heal and I was getting a lot of pain around my joints and bones.”
He inhaled again, shakier than before at the same time that Alfred sits himself down with a hand over his mouth.
“It’s stage 2 and because of my lack of a spleen it’s going to be a harder process for treatment but fortunately I own a medical company so there’s that at least.” He makes a sort of joking smile that falters immediately, falling into a pulled back frown that comes with someone whose about to sob as he adds, “But it’s also aggressive so I-I don’t know how-how to-fuck-“
Dick and Cass are immediately moving off the couches they are on and catch him as he finally crumbles into himself.
Bruce is next to follow, the stoic man openly crying for the first time in years.
Jason and Damian are in shock, both frozen in place as dread takes over their minds.
Steph is looking out the window, as if staring at some kind of his or deity and demanding an expiration as to why they have to hurt her loved ones so badly. She’s crying, but it’s silent which is all the more harrowing.
Lucius places a hand on Alfred’s shoulder to comfort the elder even as he himself itches to go comfort the young boy who helped him run the company when he was at his worst.
Kate leaves the room to go call Bette, needing her mentor because this is just something she can’t handle.
Duke is sobbing into his hands as he leans into Barbara’s lap. Barbara who is clinging to him like a lifeline as she feels her world shift once again, feeling so angry and confused at how one of them could be threatened like this. Of all the ways they could go out, was it really going to be cancer?
It was a harrowing experience for all of them to remember that they were human in more than just their flesh being able to bleed and be wounded, but for it to grow sick. For it to age and attack itself.
They were human at the end of the day and Tim…
In Metropolis, Clark Kent rushed into the bathroom at his work to throw up as he heard a conversation miles away.
#batfam#tim drake#bat family#dc comics#batfamily#dc universe#dc#tim drake is red robin#damian wayne#Jason Todd#dick grayson#barbara gordon#cassandra cain#kate kane#bette kane#duke thomas#lucius fox#alfred pennyworth#bruce wayne#sick fic#cancer#tw cancer#cancer awareness
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i’ve been deadass tired these last couple days i think the exhaustion from school finally hit me i’ve mostly been sleeping lmaooo
#playing some video games now tho and all i can think about is infamous#i finally craving to draw so probably on thursday i’ll try it out and see what happens#i have appointments tomorrow lol#lyriumsings txt#i’m so ready tho#i wanna tweak sevens hair#and i need to find a more concrete facial ref for DW#rn i mostly am just thinking about general features#what i have isn’t bad#but i can’t shake that it’s not good enough#i’ve gathered SO MANY REFS THO#so i’m excited to organize them#and put them to use#rowan is also living rent free in my mind#i hope his warm up goes well lol
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✨ How Your Dominant Planet Secretly Shapes Your Teenage Brain ✨
Have you ever looked back at your late teens and wondered why you were so obsessed with certain things? Like, one friend was glued to their guitar and poetry journals, another was training for their fifth marathon, and you? You were probably neck-deep in your thing. Here’s the deal: your dominant planet was pulling the strings behind the scenes, shaping how your mind worked and what you gravitated toward without you even realizing it.
Let’s break it down:
🌞 SUN Dominant: "I need to shine—what’s the point otherwise?" Late teens for Sun-kissed folks are like a personal hero’s journey. You’re obsessed with figuring out who you are. Your brain’s constantly asking, Am I good enough? Do people see my worth? You might’ve been the captain of the debate team, the drama club star, or just that person who somehow made walking to the cafeteria look like a runway. How your mind works: Everything feels like a stage, and you want to perform your best—even in front of yourself. You seek validation, yes, but deep down, it’s about finding your inner confidence.
🌙 MOON Dominant: "I feel… everything. Is that normal?" For Moon folks, the late teens are an emotional hurricane. You’re all about understanding feelings, whether it’s yours or everyone else’s. You probably overthink texts (why’d they only reply with “k”?), cry over movies you’ve seen a million times, and have deep, borderline-therapeutic convos with your bestie. How your mind works: You process the world emotionally first, logically second. You’re learning how to handle your empathy without drowning in it.
🔥 MARS Dominant: "Let’s go! But… where are we going?" Mars kids are powered by action and passion, and your late teens are when you’re learning to channel that fire. Your brain thrives on challenges, so you probably signed up for every sport, pushed yourself in the gym, or got way too into proving someone wrong in an argument. Impulse control? We’ll work on that later. How your mind works: You process through doing. Sitting around theorizing makes you twitchy. You need action, even if it’s messy. Picking fights on the basketball court because the ref made a bad call, then realizing you’re actually just mad your crush didn’t text you back.
💬 MERCURY Dominant: "Wait, how does that work? Tell me everything!" Mercury-dominant teens are curiosity machines. Your brain’s like a search engine that never stops running. You want to know why, how, who, and what if. You’re that kid who can’t let a fun fact go without looking it up. Debates? Bring ’em on. Trivia? Your jam. Group chats? You run them. How your mind works: You connect ideas at lightning speed. Learning isn’t just a necessity; it’s your love language. Staying up until 3 a.m. watching YouTube videos about conspiracy theories, then showing up to school explaining why aliens totally built the pyramids.
💎 VENUS Dominant: "Why settle for okay when life can be beautiful?" Your late teens are a crash course in pleasure, relationships, and aesthetics. You’re probably experimenting with your style (cue questionable fashion phases), figuring out love (hello, hopeless romantic), or diving into art and music. Life needs to feel good, or it’s just not worth it. How your mind works: You’re tuned to beauty and connection. Your decisions are emotional but driven by desire—whether it’s for love, art, or the perfect selfie.Spending an hour perfecting your eyeliner just to go to the grocery store because what if you meet someone cute?
🌍 SATURN Dominant: "I’m too busy for nonsense." While your friends are out making impulsive mistakes, you’re busy building your future. Saturn-dominant teens have an old-soul vibe. You’re focused on responsibility, probably working a part-time job while juggling school and worrying about saving for college. Fun? Sure, but only if it’s productive. How your mind works: You crave structure and long-term success. While others wing it, you plan 10 steps ahead. Skipping a party to study for finals because failing isn’t an option—not because of pressure, but because you expect better from yourself.
🚀 RAHU Dominant: "What’s the wildest thing I can do right now?" Rahu teens are like explorers charting unknown territory. You’re obsessed with breaking rules, chasing thrills, and doing the forbidden. If it’s edgy, you’re into it. You’re the one sneaking out, dyeing your hair neon green, or trying things that make adults nervous. How your mind works: You’re wired to seek more. More excitement, more knowledge, more of life’s extremes. Going on a spontaneous road trip with friends, breaking the rules, or getting into something your parents wouldn’t approve of—just because it felt like the next big adventure.
🌌 KETU Dominant: "I’m here, but also not really here." Ketu teens are all about spiritual detachment. You’re introspective, reflective, and a bit aloof. While everyone else is chasing their dreams, you’re figuring out why dreams matter at all. Meditation, tarot, or even just staring at the stars for hours—you’re vibing on a higher plane. How your mind works: You reject surface-level stuff, diving into the depths of existence. But you also need to learn to be present. Skipping out on big social events to sit at a park by yourself, journaling about the mysteries of life, or getting into spiritual practices like meditation because they felt more authentic than anything else.
🚀 JUPITER Dominant: "Knowledge is freedom, and I’m going after it!" Jupiter-dominant teens are all about growth, knowledge, and the bigger picture. Your late teens were likely filled with plans for the future, exploring new ideas, and constantly looking for ways to improve. You may have been the one always talking about your next big trip, your dream career, or the philosophies that shaped your world view. How your mind works: You crave expansion and understanding. Learning is your path to freedom. Deep-diving into a topic you just discovered, researching potential career paths, or discussing ideas about travel, culture, and self-improvement with anyone who would listen. Your teenage years were wild, weren’t they? Which planet had your brain on lock? Reblog with your planetary dominant and let’s compare chaotic late-teen stories. 🌠
#astrology#vedicastrology#tropical astrology#venus#mars#jupiter#moon#ketu#AstrologyCommunity#VedicAstrology#StarryWisdom#CosmicJourney#MysticVibes#SpiritualAwakening#AstroInsights#AstroBlog#DivineGuidance#InnerJourney#SeekersUnite#SoulSearchers#AlignedEnergy#YourSoulTribe#SelfExploration#vedic astro notes#vedic astro observations#vedic astrology#darakaraka#venus darakaraka#sidereal astrology#naskshatra
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Zombies
(So this is a little continuation from this post)
So basically in that post, Marvel and Aquaman got separated from the JL and find some ancient underwater Atlantean zombies.
*zombie groan*
Aquaman and Marvel: *slowly look over*
Giant Horde of Zombies: *just standing there*
They proceeded to go on a scooby doo be do type of chase, eventually deciding to hide in a ruined building.
Aquaman: “Should we just get rid of them?” *peeks head over some rubble to look at the zombies and is already readying his trident*
Marvel: “We can’t.” *also peaks head*
Aquaman: “What do you mean, we can’t? We have to take care of this now. If we leave, they might follow us back to Atlantis.”
Marvel: “I’m not saying we should leave them. They’re cursed.”
Aquaman: “Magic did this?”
Marvel: “Yeah.” *nods head* “We have to find out what happened to them.”
Aquaman: “Wouldn’t killing them be much easier? It’d be putting them out of their misery.”
Marvel: “Arthur, they’re still alive.”
Aquaman: “Eeeeh… Are they though?”
Marvel and Aquaman: *watch has a zombie runs into a wall and keeps trying to walk through that wall*
Marvel: “They are. Killing them will be our Plan B. If the curse is lifted, they might go back to normal and if not...”
Marvel and Aquaman: *look back at the zombie that is still running into the wall repeatedly*
Marvel: “We’ll get rid of them.”
After sneaking around a bunch more, they finally found a temple.
Marvel: “Gosh, I remember this place!” *looking around in wonder* “It was beautiful. It’s a real shame it’s just ruins now.”
Aquaman: *leaning down and looking at some broken stained glass* “I bet it was.”
Marvel: *spots a chalice on an altar* “I think that’s is it. I can sense some magic residue.” *jogs over*
Aquaman: *also walks over and spots a plaque on the altar* “Ancient Atlantean?” *skims it over* “Wow. The thing in that cup was a glorified liquid plague.”
Marvel: “It was? All the priests always talked about it like it was holy water.” *picks up the chalice* “Looks like someone drank it.”
Aquaman: “No wonder they’re zombies.”
Marvel: “Huh. To think the plague lasted this long. It’s a wonder they aren’t decomposing.”
Aquaman: “Uh, Cap?” *points to the horde rushing at them*
Marvel: *sighs* “It looks like we’ll have to get rid of them after all. If they’ve been with this plague for so long, it’s probably bonded too deep for me to use a counterspell.”
Aquaman: *pulls out his trident and gets to work*
Like Two Days Later…
Supes: “You were gone for almost two days, where have you been?”
Aquaman: “Oh yeah, that’s our bad. We got rid of some zombies-
Flash: “Zombies??”
Aquaman: “-and then popped up to the surface for some burgers.”
Batman: “And you didn’t think to contact us at all?”
Marvel: “We were really hungry. Arthur also tried to pay them in Atlantean currency cause that was all he had. So I spent like twenty minutes having to convert it into US dollars.” (Ref to the Wonder Girl and Marvel post from a long long long time ago)
Flash: “Cool! Uh… but why’re you guys covered in blood.”
Aquaman: “This is from the zombies.”
WW: “Have neither of you bathed yet…?”
Marvel: “Nope.”
They were in fact covered in blood. Fun fact, after killing all the zombies, Arthur actually found out the hard way that Atlantan zombie blood doesn’t infect you if it gets in your mouth. Though, he still ended up retching for like five minutes while Marvel was just patting his back.
Aquaman: *violently retching his guts out*
Marvel: “It’s okay, pal. Let it all out.” *patting his back*
#billy batson#shazam#dc captain marvel#captain marvel dc#fawcett city#fawcett#fawcett comics#aquaman#arthur curry
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Revenge
Rhea Ripley x Wrestler! Reader
Plot: With Rhea gone because of injury, leaving (Y/N) alone in the Judgement Day, and the new target for Liv Morgan. But when Rhea returns from injury, all is fair in love and war
Word Count: 914
Warnings: None, just an angry Rhea Ripley :)
Main Masterlist
WWE Masterlist
Since Rhea was sidelined after Wrestlemania, things slowly started to fall apart within Judgment Day. With Damian struggling to keep the group together, Finn and JD winning the Tag team belts was amazing. But having Dom running around and fooling around with Liv, was driving a spike deep into the heart of the Judgement Day.
But the person taking Rhea’s absence the worst was (Y/N). Failing to get the women’s title after Rhea relinquished it, dealing with the group, and Liv bullying her was starting to get too much for her. The boys tried not to let Liv near her, but once Dom spent a lot of time with her, keeping her distance was getting harder.
(Y/N) was getting ready for her match against her friend, Dakota Kai. Usually, Rhea would have come out with her, but because of the injury, she had been flying solo.
“There you are, I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Damian’s voice booms in the small empty hallway. “Are you ok?” he asks.
“Yeah. This has been one of the only places that Liv can’t find me to harass me,” she says, looking down at her boots. She never likes showing how much Liv affects her.
Damian sighs, placing a hand on her shoulder. He tries his best to get Liv away from her, and away from Dom, but he can only do so much.
“Do you want me to accompany you to the ring tonight?” he asks. (Y/N)’s heart warms at the offer, missing someone in her corner for matches.
“I think I’ll be fine. Thanks though. If I need you, I’ll send an arrow to the entrance,” she says while mimicking Damian's archer taunt. He lets out a breathy chuckle at her actions.
“What are we laughing at?” Liv’s voice breaks their moment.
“Um, nothing important,” (Y/N) says, becoming shy—Damian moves to protect her from the Women’s champion.
“I was just talking to her before her match, which is next so if you excuse us,” Damian says, grabbing (Y/N) wrist and pushing their way past Liv. Once they got out of the hallway and away from Liv, she let out a sigh of relief.
“Thanks, Damian,” she mumbles as they walk towards the gorilla.
“You know I got you,” he says while pulling her into his chest.
“(Y/R/N) and Dakota Kai to the gorilla. Match in 2 minutes,” The voice calls out over speakers.
“You ready?” He asks. She sends him a smile.
“I’m ready. But the question is are they ready for me?”
“Yes,” Dakota replies, getting a chuckle from the two members of TJD. Dakota’s music blasts as she leaves the gorilla.
Damian places his hands on her shoulders, grounding her again. Damian has stepped up a lot to be there for (Y/N) since her girlfriend has been out. Rhea has also been in constant contact because she knew that (Y/N) wouldn’t have been 100% honest with her. After all, (Y/N) wouldn’t want her to come rushing back when she wasn’t ready.
“You got this,” Damian reassures her before her music hits. She sends him one last smile, taking a deep breath, before walking through the curtain and out to the waiting crowd. (Y/N) rocking black pleather shorts with a leather garter belt. Her top was a simple pleather wrestling top with a cut-up Judgement Day shirt over it. She made her way to the ring, ready to get this small match over with.
Once the bell rings, (Y/N) was dominating the match. They had some good back and forths but (Y/N) keeps the upper hand. She could hear the growing noise coming from ringside, but she chose to ignore the noise. (Y/N) hits her finisher (a version of the Walls of Jericho), securing her win. Dakota rolls out of the ring, refs making sure she is ok.
As she was processing the win, something hard hit her in the back of the head. (Y/N) is looking up to the rafters and Liv Morgan’s face comes into her view. Liv gives her an overly ‘friendly’ wave. (Y/N) slowly rolls off of her back, still holding her head.
As (Y/N) slowly gets up, Liv grabs a steel chair and is ready to lay a beating on her. When Demons in your Dreams belt out through the arena. The crowd cheers, Liv and (Y/N) couldn’t believe it. Liv scampers out of the ring like her life depends on it while Rhea charges the ring, wanting to get her hands on her placeholder.
Rhea made sure that Liv was nowhere close to the ring before she turns her full attention to (Y/N).
“Rhea?” (Y/N) questions. Rhea moves her hair out of her face, getting a better look at her girlfriend.
“I’m here love,” she replies. Refs came over to see if extra assistance was needed.
“I thought you were still out?”
“I’m not 100% clear but I couldn’t sit at home anymore and watch you get hurt at the hands of her,” Rhea was still enraged at what had been happening. “I’m also gonna have a chat with a certain Dirty Dom after getting you to the medics,” she says while helping (Y/N) out of the ring.
“I’m happy you’re back,” she whispers for only Rhea to hear. She smiles down to her partner and places a kiss on her forehead.
“Me too babe. Me too.”
#fanfiction#fanfic#rhea ripley x reader#rhea ripley#wwe x reader#wwe fanfiction#mami rhea#rhea ripley fanfic#the judgement day#the judgment day wwe#rhea ripley x you
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The Sweetest Thing - Rafe Cameron
+18 Minor DNI
CollegeHockey!Rafe x gf!reader
⭐ republished ⭐
+18 Minor DNI
ask: sex with hockeyplayer!rafe after he won an important match
Thank you so much for your ask 🌺
🪄 hockey!rafe, bf!rafe, swearing, name-calling, Rafe & reader’s POV, hockey violence, pet names (daddy, doll, baby, babygirl etc, degradation, Rafe talks about the reader in an explicit fashion to her ex without her there, rough oral, throat fucking, cum play, creampie, semipublic sex, unprotected p in v, jealous!rafe, ownership kink, squirting, lots of dirty talk from him
📖 CollegeHockey!Rafe can’t wait to get his hands on you after winning the Frozen Four Championship game, especially after playing against your ex.
✨ He meets your eyes, his guide shifting as you pinch the bottom of his jersey you’re wearing. “Keep it on, princess. Just for a bit,” he smiles as he looks down at you at his feet, wanting to see his last name on your shoulders as you suck him off.✨
2.3 K lightly edited (<- mostly smut)
NCAA Men’s Frozen Four Championship Game…
30 seconds remaining in the 3rd Period 1-0:
Rafe’s POV:
The ref’s whistle screams through the arena. The puck drops again. I skirt and push as I look for an opening, waiting for my pass. I charge past the student section, catching her eye as I always do. My number one fan. My girl. Mine.
Easton Lawrence is a bitch. He has been since juniors; y/n’s ex-boyfriend no less. He and I usually both end up ejected from the game without fail. Not today. I promised her I’d play as nice as I could. ‘He’s not worth it. He’s a dick. He’s just trying to get under your skin, baby.’ That’s my girl’s pep talk. But Jesus fuckin’ Christ, three periods of this shit-talkin’ from him has me wanting to toss all that out the window. He loves to fuck with me. And he always has—every damn game.
Easton bumps his stick against the glass, giving her a smile that she doesn’t return. Good girl. We meet at the line, getting ready for puck drop. His silver chain hangs out of his jersey. Of course, I stalked her IG before we dated; I know that pendant was a gift from her. #6 shines in the bright rink lights, making my blood boil.
“Y/n looks good, Cameron. Sweetest fucking pussy I ever had.” He chirps, taking a jab as he has, each one getting more infuriating than the last as he inches closer and closer to my soft spot. Her. He just had to do it.
“Say her name again. Do it, bitch,” I warn.
“I miss her sayin’ mine, that’s for sure,” he sneers as he tightens his stick in his mitts.
“You startin’ shit ‘cause you’re losin’, asshole? This game is almost over. Give it up.” The whistle blows, a false start, leaving him plenty more time to run his mouth. My turn. “Good? Nah, buddy. My girl looks perfect. And I’m man enough to agree with you, perfect fuckin’ pussy. Too bad you weren’t man enough to make her cum. Huh?”
Easton laughs wickedly and shakes his head. “Gonna fucking kill you when I find you in the parkin’ lot, Cameron. I swear to Christ.”
“No, you ain’t. ‘Cause I’m gonna take that sweet pussy to the first locker room I find and rail what’s mine. Gonna make her forget that any man’s name’s ever passed her lips but Rafe Cameron.”
The whistle blasts, and the puck drops. I get an elbow to the gut immediately, Easton prodding and taunting me instantly. There are so many bodies in front of the net, but I catch my opening. The puck hits my stick, a little backhand flick. I watch as she trickles past the goal line.
The siren sounds, and the crowd cheers loudly as the music blares. I skate toward him, getting in his face before my teammates can reach me to celebrate, making the refs rush around us, anticipating a brawl. “Gettin’ her and the win, pussy. Have fun beatin’ your own dick, bitch,” I dig. Easton shoves me hard, and I shove him back, slapping his chest and ripping that cheap-ass Zale’s chain off his chest before hurling it over the glass.
"Break it up!” The refs scream, blowing their whistles again.
My co-captain bumps me with his stick, giving me a broad smile. That was the winning goal. A few boys drag me in for a celebratory hug before skating back to the bench. There are only a few seconds left, and the crowd’s goin’ crazy aleady. Y/n can barely contain her excitement. I give her a wink, and she smiles back, giving me a little finger wave that has me even more eager for the final buzzer.
Sure, they’ll be press after this. A quick interview with ESPNU, maybe a few words from the coaches; a quick speech from us captains. But when I’m done with all that shit, I’m fuckin’ my girl just like I said I would.
My coach smiles at me proudly, not wanting to jinx the next 30 seconds of play. The only thing that would be better is if the puck passed the white ice before the clock hit 0.0.
But I don’t wanna get greedy now, do I? I’ll save that for her.
Reader’s POV:
“Congratulations, captain…” Your lips meet his neck, a soft kiss, feeling his heartbeat under your lips. You palm his cock, rolling your fingers gently over the fabric. Rafe moans deeply, vibrations buzzing against your lips. You work a little lower, kissing and tracing his strong chest and abs, working to the locker room floor.
Your fingers run softly against the deep indentations of his v-lines, making his muscles flex. You smile up at him from your knees, catching your fingers under the band of his boxers, pulling them to his feet, watching as his aching cock springs free, Rafe letting out a sigh of relief.
He meets your eyes, his guide shifting as you pinch the bottom of his jersey you’re wearing. “Keep it on, princess. Just for a bit,” he smiles as he looks down at you at his feet, wanting to see his last name on your shoulders as you suck him off.
“I love your cock, baby,” you laud as you take him in your hands.
“Yeah?” He groans, watching you near his tip; a bead of precum gathers on his head, rolling slowly before it falls to the concrete. “Don’t go wastin’ it now,” he teases as you run your tongue along your bottom lip; mouth water, wanting the weight and taste of him on your tongue.
“If I was at the hotel, I’d lick it off the floor. I swear,” you smile as Rafe looks down at you in awe.
“Just a filthy little slut for me. Aren’t you, baby?”
“Mmm… Mhmm.” You hum, preening him up with your tongue. Rafe closes his eyes, tilting his head back to the ceiling. He cradles your head in his hands as you swirl slowly.
“This mouth, baby,” he mumbles.
Rafe’s eyes open, watching as you kiss him sloppily, teasing him with the thought of your lips wrapped around him fully, the warmth of your mouth swathing him. “Shit,” he pants, sexual tension painted all over his handsome face. You smile wickedly, lips parting slightly as he watches you take him into your mouth. “Fuckkk,” he moans, drawing out the word with a deep breath. You bob back and forth, choking on his big dick each time. He holds your head a little tighter in his hands as you increase your pace.
Rafe starts to trill on your tongue, mumbling praise as you add your hands. He tugs your hair, causing you to moan around his cock. Rafe takes control, gliding slower, taking a different grip entirely, holding your cheeks in his large hands. The fat tip of his cock kisses the back of your throat, spit seeping from the corners of your mouth.
“This mouth is mine. All fucking mine,” he grunts. “And you’re gonna swallow it all. Yeah?” Rafe asks raspily, stroking your full cheeks with his thumbs. “‘Course you are. Can’t answer with this pretty little mouth full of dick. Can you?”
Rafe thrusts deeply a few more times before giving you back the reins. You draw off him fully, a gasp for air releases from your open lips, drool connecting from the tip of his cock to your kiss-swollen lips. You spit on his dick, getting messy just like he likes, stroking him with your fist. "I’m all yours, Rafe.”
He shakes his head and smiles. “Mhmm… That’s right, princess.” You wrap your lips around his tip, creating a suction that makes him moan your name. Your hands wrap around, gripping his ass, as you start to stroke him with your mouth again. Lewd noises fill the locker room; Rafe, panting and like a dog; you, slurping and squelching with each bob of your head. Tears leak down your cheeks, eyes locked on him, watching as he starts to near his finish. Rafe’s cock swells on your tongue; his muscular thighs trembling as you squeeze. ”So good, baby… I’m gonna - Fuck.“ Warm, white ropes hit the back of your throat as you take his big load, swallowing it all.
You bind your fingers a little tighter, milking out his last bits of pleasure, skimming your tongue along his tip, catching what little remains, flattening your tongue to show him yourself. “My girl,” he smiles, hooking a finger under your chin, leading you to your feet. Rafe spits in your open mouth one moment, kissing you deeply the next, slipping his tongue inside. Your tongues swirl together, Rafe holding onto you tight.
"I need you, baby,” you plead against his lips, and he smiles on yours.
“Yeah? You need this dick, princess?”
“I need it,” you whisper, taking his bottom lips between your teeth.
“She needs it… I wanna fill up this sweet pussy,” he mumbles. “Nobody else gets you but me. No one else knows this cunt like I do. Do they?” He asks, all low and husky against your neck. You respond with a needy uh huh, making him chuckle as you melt into him more, feeling your arousal pool in your panties. “I’m gonna be drippin’ out of you all night.”
“I’m counting on it, Rafe,” you breathe. He strips you out of his jersey quick; your pants already tossed to the side, leaving you in your black lacy bra and panties. Rafe unclasps your bra as he kisses down your neck, holding your breasts in his ringed hands. He reels and flicks his tongue across your sensitive bud, pinching the other between his rough digits. You scratch your fingers into his damp hair, guiding him lower and lower.
“Babygirl,” he chuckles as he snaps your panties at the hip, seeing his #2 embroidered into the fabric. “I fuckin’ love you. You know that.”
“You like it?”
“You know I would. I love ‘em.” He kisses your skin, then the number, working lower and lower, hitching your leg over his shoulder to get better access to your sopping core. Rafe licks the fabric, tasting you, groaning against your clothed cunt at the taste. “M’gonna leave these on… Get ‘em all messy. When we get back to the hotel after the bar, you can take ‘em off. Deal?”
“Deal,” you smile as you brush back his bangs to see his pretty baby blues.
“‘N by you I mean me,” he smiles playfully. “I’m already thinkin’ about later, baby. Got me fuckin’ pussy whipped,” Rafe laughs as he lifts you into his strong arms.
“I’m addicted to you, Cameron. I guess we’re even,” you whisper against his lips as you hook your ankles around his waist, driving your body closer as he presses your back into the cool brick wall. ”Fuck me?“ You whine, desperation laced in your tone. ”Please.“
“I love when you beg for my cock. Think you could get nice and loud for me, princess?” You bite your lip and nod in reply. “Beautiful.”
Rafe pushes your panties to the side; you tilt your forehead against his, the two of you watching as his long cock nears your warmth. ”Shit,“ you whine as he circles your sensitive clit with his velvety head, making him smirk. Rafe moves a little lower, gliding through your folds, teasing your entrance with his pink, swollen tip. You both moan in unison as he fucks up into you.
You gasp and fuss, feeling him split you in two. Your boyfriend wasting no time stroking, hitting that special spot. He pins you to the wall, leaning in, rutting quickly. His thrusts are merciless, absolutely intense as you cling to his shoulders. You cry out in pleasure as his toned body claps against your clit, his ruddy head repeatedly striking your g-spot.
“Atta girl. Keep screamin’ like that.”
”Rafe… Oh my god. I’m gonna cum,“ you moan as stars dance in your eyes, white-hot pleasure overtaking you entirely as you cum all over his cock. Rafe works you even quicker, fucking you through your orgasms as your nails dig into his shoulder blades.
“Got this pussy creamin’ for me. Think I could make her cry,” he taunts through mumbled words, sucking and biting your skin, marking you up.
Rafe pulls you off the wall, leaving you gasping, his dick still buried deep as he carries you to the bench. He sits down, letting you straddle his lap as you kiss. Rafe adjusts slightly, leaning back into the wall, enjoying the view, catching a different angle, making you suck in some air. You lift your body, rising fully before spreading your thighs wide again. Rafe grips your ass in his hands, following you as you move. ”It’s too much,“ you whine, bottom lip wobbling, as he stretches you out.
“You’re lyin’,” he laughs breathily between jagged breaths. “My baby can take it.”
You throw your head back as you bounce, nailing the perfect spot, feeling every curve and ridge of Rafe’s dick as your thighs start to burn. Rafe’s thumb presses against your throbbing clit rubbing circles on top. ”Say my name when you cum, princess. Scream my fuckin’ name.“
”Sh-Shit,” you stutter, cock-drunk, thighs quivering uncontrollably, making you lose your rhythm. “M’gonna cum.”
“Cum on my cock, baby. Let me have it.”
Your orgasm rips through your body, pleasure hitting you harder than your first release, toes curling as you’re sent into ecstasy. Before you can come down, he picks you up, pushing you onto the cold bench, thrusting into you suddenly. The sounds of his skin clapping against yours echoes through the locker room. You let out a loud cry, making him smile wildly before your eyes pinch shut, gripping the metal edge, making your knuckles turn white.
“Look at me, princess. Eyes on me. M’almost there. You’re doin’ so good, f’me.” He lifts his hand, pressing two fingers between your lips before bringing them down to your clit, playing with your pussy.
”Yes! Just - Just like that. Fuck. Rafe,“ you squeal. ”Oh shit-“ Your orgasm spills over, soaking his cock, wetting your panties and his thighs. Rafe’s hips snap into you, filling you with his warmth. He topples down on top of you, burying himself in your neck, mumbling soft “I love you’s” as he rocks through your shared release. Rafe kisses your cheeks, then your lips, lingering close as you both come down from your bliss.
“Sweetest fuckin’ pussy I’ve ever had.”
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THE BLUE OF THE SKY MUST HAVE BEEN MY IMAGINATION ; SATORU GOJO
synopsis; satoru can’t take your grief away. but on days when you feel as if it’s swallowing you whole, pulling you underwater, he’ll be there to reach a hand out.
word count; 10.9k
contents; satoru gojo/reader, f!reader (gn prns are used, but gojo calls you sweet girl and princess), depictions of grief/allusions to death (reader mourns their dead best friend), hurt/comfort (heavy on both), fluffy towards the end, satoru is a good partner <3, stsg subtext if you squint, switching povs, reader is implied to be a non-sorcerer!!
a/n; i’ve always loved the idea of gojo being with a reader who also lost their best friend/other half, so this is just me playing around with that concept :3 losing a soulmate and finding a new one through the loss of that thread must feel really meaningful, right? + i’m also dedicating this piece to @neptuneblue my precious bday girl <33 i added an extra dose of devotion, flower symbolism and greek mytho refs just for you!! (pretty dividers by @/saradika-graphics <33)
a pang of sorrow.
as your consciousness begins to unfurl, cruelly torn apart from the realm of dreams, the sensation hits you like a hammer to a nail. your eyes flutter open, and your muddled mind adjusts to the soft light dyeing your bedroom a mellow gold — patches of sunlight splattering on the bed and warming up your skin, illuminating your features. gentle and soothing.
almost as if trying to coax you back to sleep; trying to protect you from something you don’t quite understand. just close your eyes, your body whispers, your mind shushes. don’t think about anything at all.
but you don’t listen.
part of you knows it’s a mistake. trying to identify the source of your sadness usually only makes your heart feel more tangled up — but you get the sense that this particular sorrow is one you should never, ever let go of. so you rest against the mattress, focus on the rise and fall of your chest, and simply feel it out.
it’s a strange sensation. blooming like a flower, in the back of your brain, expanding at an alarming rate — seeping into your bloodstream, soaking the sheets beneath you with something dark and gritty, something that sends shivers down your spine. an acute sensation that something is wrong.
that something has been wrong. for a very long time.
(and then it hits you.)
— ah.
an intake of breath. the open air has been warmed up by caring sunrays, bouncing off the glass of the windows. it tastes like dust and daydreams.
it’s today, isn’t it?
the flower in the back of your brain keeps unfurling, leaving you with a certain ache you can’t get rid of. a stain you can never, ever rinse away — and the sun’s comforting embrace does nothing to quell its weight.
what a shame, you think, gazing out at the blue of the sky. the weather is so lovely today…
something tickles your cheek. it snaps you out of your spiraling thoughts; and this time, you don’t need to feel it out to know what it is. you’re already well aware. your brain knows, your body, every string of your heartbeat.
a strand of white hair. ghosting over your cheek, causing you to stir.
two big arms are looped around your midriff, heavy and slumbering, practically immovable. you’ve tried to peel them off more times than you can count, but they just won’t budge — if anything, that only makes him cling to you tighter. subconsciously or otherwise.
(you suspect it’s the latter, on most days.)
as always, you’re pressed up against him, close as can be. completely enveloped by his scent and body warmth, strawberries and stardust, cocooned in the safety his touch brings you — like a big, weighted blanket. or maybe more like a clingy dog.
and, despite everything… it manages to cheer you up a little. doing what the delicate caress of sunlight couldn’t. just feeling him close is enough for the corners of your lips to curl up, a warmth trying to take root in your hollowed out chest; feeling his heart beat against your own, in steady motions.
satoru. your very own personal sun.
he’s admittedly cute like this, soft little breaths slipping from his parted lips, quiet snores that he’d deny if you ever brought them up — his jaw resting contentedly on the top of your head. it’s sweet. he’s sweet. but the feeling of his hair tickling your skin is a little insufferable.
insufferable, but still somehow so endearing.
(you’ll probably always find him endearing, no matter what he does. maybe you should feel embarrassed.)
when you crane your neck, glancing up at the man in question — your breath hitches. halts, in the back of your throat. afraid to come too close.
satoru is always pretty, but there’s something so serene about the way he looks in the morning. before he has a chance to wake up, cover up, make himself seem bigger than he is. right now, he looks so unguarded; so sleepy and pretty and comfortable. specks of sunlight scatter across that pretty face of his, like little freckles, caressing his skin with a heavenly glow.
it really is such a shame. the sun is shining brightly, waving hello to the newly-awakened city, and your own personal sun is right by your side. snuggled up with you, and looking prettier than ever.
but neither of those blessings are enough to change the inevitability of what day it is, today. you feel a little bad; but you know what you have to do.
just to see the limitations, you squirm away — or try to. you don’t even move an inch. satoru’s got you trapped, caged in by his strong arms, like he’s making sure to protect you even in his dreams. a big, overprotective bear.
wanting not to rouse him from his peaceful slumber, you can’t bring yourself to make much of an effort, either. your hands travel down to the expanse of his arms, wrapped around your midriff, gentle and light as you try to tug them off. but he won’t relent so easily — the moment you succeed even slightly, those insistent arms fall back in position. only trapping you further.
after your fifth attempt bears no fruit, satoru lets out a low groan; shifting closer, and hugging you just a little tighter. muttering under his breath.
so you resort to a different tactic.
when you finally get a proper look at him, craning your neck as far as you can, your eyes soften. his expression makes your heart melt; sleepy and snug, and just a tad annoyed. because of your numerous escape attempts, no doubt.
he’s so beautiful it hurts. just a little, just to look at him, just to map out every contour of his angelic face.
so you feel a little guilty. you really don’t want to wake him up, when he so rarely gets to sleep in like this — and he’s been working so hard, lately. doing his usual sorcerer thing, that he never lets you know too much about. the guilt seeps into your bones, growing deeper with every second spent etching his soft expression into your memory, knowing just how tired he must be.
it’s not like you really have a choice, though.
leaning closer, so close you can hear his heartbeat if you strain your ears enough, you put your lips against his skin. he smells like strawberries, from the shampoo he always steals from you, and he’s pleasantly warm. like a confectionary.
a moment passes. you drag it out as long as you can, indulging in the sweet fragrance.
then you begin trailing kisses up his jaw, ghosting over his skin. soft little butterflies, fluttering from his jaw to his cheekbone.. once you get close enough to see the way his eyelashes flutter, and he stirs ever so slightly, you lean in to whisper in his ear.
”satoru,” you murmur. ”just need to go to the bathroom. can you let go for a little bit, please?”
you try your best to speak as quietly as you can, not wanting to disturb him too much — but you can tell he hears you, even in the state he’s in. all tuckered out, his muddled mind still registering the sound of your voice, how you move your lips to form sounds. a lullaby to his sleep-ridden brain.
bringing a hand up to his forehead, you brush his bangs away with palpable tenderness, leaving a kiss against his forehead. satoru stirs, again; letting out a sleepy noise somewhere between a groan, a sigh, and a whine. squeezing his eyes shut.
”honey,” you coo, hoping the term of endearment will get his attention. ”let go, please? i’ll be quick.”
satoru’s eyes blink open, slowly, like the shutter of a camera. you wish you could take a picture of him, right now — in all his angelic glory, painted over with warm colours and tangled up in freshly washed bedsheets.
he takes a moment to adjust, unaccustomed to the bright morning light of your bedroom, face scrunching up — then his gaze falls on you.
and his heartbeat picks up.
you’re looking up at him so sweetly, fingers reaching out to cup his cheek, smooth skin against his own. the cerulean of his eyes flutter shut once more, as he nuzzles into your palm; moving one of his arms from your waist, just so he can place his palm over yours, where it rests against his skin. absentminded.
a smile crawls up to your lips.
”… mm,” is all he manages, an incoherent little mumble. you make another attempt at getting away, only one of his arms caging you in now, but it still doesn’t work. the moment he feels you even try, he tugs you even closer. arm keeping you nice and safe in his embrace.
satoru makes sure that his palm is still resting over yours when he leans forward, snuggles further into your side. nuzzling into your neck, pressing his lips against your collarbone, muffling a low whine.
”stay,” he murmurs, sleepy and upset, and you almost give in. he’s still too tired to really register what’s happening, only that you’re trying to leave him.
it makes your chest ache.
a soft sigh leaves your lips. ah, this really is too cruel. how are you supposed to ever leave his embrace when he’s acting like this?
”satoru…” your free hand finds its way to his hair, carding through the pure white strands, and he practically purrs. ”just gotta go to the bathroom. i’ll be back, okay? i’ll hurry.”
another incoherent mumble. he doesn’t move, doesn’t even attempt to. still kissing your collarbone, content to have you run your fingers through his soft locks.
and you feel awful, you do — but desperate times call for desperate measures.
as you feel him slowly, gradually fall back asleep under your caring touches… you opt to make your move. this time, you’re a little rougher — tugging his arm off and squirming away before he can think to stop you. it’s hard not to feel guilty, especially with the whine satoru lets out, arms blindly reaching out towards you — to no avail. you’re sure the loss of body warmth hits him just as hard as it does you.
an urgent voice inside your chest begs you to soothe him, to console him. seeing the little pout on his pretty lips, the furrow of his brow.
so you lean over, carefully, cupping his cheek to leave a soft kiss against his forehead. a silent apology. ”i’ll be back soon, toru. go back to sleep, okay?” you hope he feels your love, in the action, in the words. even if he’s not really conscious enough to properly respond.
just in case he doesn’t, you state your feelings more transparently. thumb caressing his cheekbone, as a whisper flows from out your lips: ”i love you.”
maybe it’s just your imagination, or a coincidence, but you swear he settles down a little after that. succumbing to the needs of his sleepy brain, still a little groggy and frustrated; but soothed enough to rest easy. so far, so good. caught up with thoughts of satoru, and how tiny he looks all alone in the big bed, your brain momentarily forgets about the sorrow.
but the moment you step out of the bedroom, it’s there to greet you again. creeping up on you — a subtle, gentle kind of shock. almost kind. but hollow and cold, like the temperature of the room dropped, your almost-smile fading like a piece of paper blown away by the wind.
and suddenly, you remember what day it is. you remember what you’re supposed to be doing.
as you brew your morning cup of coffee, trying to distract yourself with the purring of the espresso machine in front of you, you find your thoughts drifting back to satoru. hoping he’ll manage to stay asleep, despite your interference — it’s his first day off in a while. he needs to rest.
… and you don’t really know if you could deal with him, if he were to wake up and locate you right now. you can imagine what he’d say, what his expression would be like; and you can imagine the exact moment he’d realize that something is wrong, how easily he’d be able to squeeze the answers out of you. you’re weak to satoru. you’d tell him immediately, just to get him to stop frowning that subtle way he always does when he’s worried but doesn’t want you to know.
which is exactly why this is your only option. sneaking away while he’s asleep, blissfully unaware, even if the guilt eats at your heart. you suppose it’s a welcome distraction.
(today was going to feel awful, one way or another.)
everything feels a little like a struggle; putting your coat on, stepping into your shoes, making sure you have everything you need. and then, lastly, the note. satoru leaves them for you fairly often, on days he has to go to work early and doesn’t want to wake you, before late night missions and sudden workloads. when the reverse is true, you do the same. just something simple, a little act of love.
i’ll be back around midnight. don’t wait up for me, okay?
have a good day. :)
don’t eat my portion of the kikufuku! i know you’re thinking about it.
i love you. <3
… usually, leaving a little note behind for him to find would make your heart feel light. but today, it’s not nearly as fun. you try your best to sound lighthearted; wholly aware of how ominous the contents still end up sounding.
good morning, satoru ♡ i’m sorry for waking you up before :( and for leaving without saying anything. i have an important errand to run, so i’ll be gone for a while. i’ll make sure i’m back before the sun sets, so just be patient, okay? i know you’re probably really mad, but don’t be too angry with me when i get back, please? i’ll buy you something sweet omw back!! ^^ that’s all, i think. i know how this sounds, but don’t worry. i’ll be back before you know it. have a good day, alright? enjoy your day off!! i love you ♡ :)
in all honesty, it’s a little mean. telling satoru not to worry about you is like telling the sun not to shine. he’s confident when he’s with you, thoroughly assured of his ability to protect you… but when you’re out of his sight, you think he gets a little anxious. even if he’s awfully good at hiding it.
still, there’s nothing else to do. you swallow the guilt, stick the note to the fridge, and step over the threshold. out into the real world, the cold world, the empty world. as the sun envelops you, and a spring breeze enters your lungs — that acute awareness strangling you only seems to grow deeper.
everything finally dawns on you, all at once. and it’s impossible to shake away that suffocating feeling —
the feeling that something is wrong.
(that something has been wrong. for a very, very long time.)
the cemetery is empty, this year.
you suspect the glaring sun has something to do with it. blinding you, casting a bright glow over the tombs of the dead, entirely out of place. no one wants to do their mourning in this kind of weather. it just feels wrong.
that hasn’t stopped you, though. you wonder if it’s due to a love so strong it disregards the weather, or a blatant disregard towards the feelings of the dead.
maybe both. probably both.
the solitude creeps up on you like a hungry ghost, but it’s a blessing in flimsy disguise; right now, you’re all alone. and today, that’s all you truly need. a feeling almost like stepping into another realm, one with no connection to things like reality or time. it’s just you, and the graves, and the ghosts. there’s no one here to see you cry, no one who can pretend like they understand. no one to witness the price you’ve paid for loving so fervently.
slowly, you make your way across the cemetery. sparing a glance towards the city skyline, before fixing your eyes on one particular tomb.
when you crouch down, the paper bag in your hand hits the ground with a soft crunch. all flowers are still in perfect condition; asters and forget-me-nots, haberleas and hyacinths. you cradle them tightly, pressed against your chest, feeding off your weakening heartbeat — your eyes moving, flitting over the grave, the name engraved into the stone. putting the bouquet down.
(you really hope she’ll like them.)
it’s surreal. to look at an object and still see a person, to touch the petals of a flower and remember the softness of human skin. you never quite got used to it. all you ever seem to do is lean into the strangeness of it all, the kick you get out of sullying something untainted. trying to remember something that should be left in the past. you can’t leave her alone.
”hi,” you whisper, so low you barely hear it. ”i’m back.”
with a sigh, you settle down on the ground; sitting cross-legged, getting comfortable. this’ll take a while.
the cherry trees are beautiful, this year. they always are; always in full bloom, almost mocking in their beauty. with their silky petals, fallen all across the ground, dyeing everything in shades of white and pink. as your eyes trail across the flowery landscape, basking in the sickening solitude of it all, that sense of otherworldliness deepens. you try not to look at the blinding sun, try not to think of the man it reminds you of.
it’s just you, here. just you, the graves, and the cherry trees. just you, and her, and your sorrow.
for a moment, you delude yourself into thinking that it’s true — you’re in a different world, now. one that settles on the wrong axis and paints itself with the wrong colours. one that stopped spinning long ago.
(the tender stirring of your heartstrings never fades away. it sounds a little like a hymn.)
all you can think of is her. all you can feel is the grief. that hole in your heart, extending, extending, extending. it hasn’t stopped since she left. a black hole of a feeling. it’s been years since it opened, years of trying to patch it up, clawing your way to a state of normalcy. living with a piece of you carved out.
losing your other half feels a little bit like dying in reverse. having to keep going with half your shadow stripped away, out of the tunnel, into the light. even if you’d much rather fall to the bottom, with your silhouette still intact.
(throughout the years, you’ve come to a single conclusion; orpheus had it so much worse than eurydice.)
despite everything, a smile curls its way onto your lips. something soft and fleeting, that blossoms within your irises, in between your ribs. she doesn’t answer you, as always, so you keep talking — anything to still feel connected to her. anything to fill the silence of the cemetery, the numbed out grief inside your chest.
”let’s see. where should i start…” is muttered into the open air, followed by a moment of silence, as you think of what to say. ”i’m still with satoru, if you were wondering. everything is still… good. more than good. he’s a really, really good guy.”
a moment passes.
”i hope you’re doing okay. wherever you are. if you’re anywhere at all,” soft air leaves your lungs, a little slip of a breath, but it’s shallow, like your chest doesn’t really care if you miss an inhale or not. like just giving and never getting could keep you alive. ”i miss you. a lot. i wish i could see you…”
a hum buzzes in your throat. you try not to think of her hair, the scent of her perfume. the flower in the back of your brain has grown bigger, you notice. unfurling at an agonizing pace, blossoming the way a wound heals. throat burning, heart aching, you swallow.
(the hole inside your heart feels jagged, like cracked glass seeping into your pancreas. a deep, internal ache.)
when you speak, your voice comes out small. nothing more than a whisper, a flurry of air. there’s an honesty to the words that makes it hard to breathe.
”… everything is so boring without you around.”
a shuddering breath leaves your wobbling lips, and you know it’s coming. you make a halfhearted attempt to keep your voice from breaking, but it doesn’t work. your eyes are already glassy, wetness spilling out, tears getting stuck in your lashes, dripping down your cheeks — you manage a meek chuckle, but it comes out sounding more like a broken whimper.
try as you might, her figure never leaves your mind. it’s all you can think of, ingrained into your retinas; a single silhouette, walking ahead of you. a sweet girl, maybe a little mean, but still so gentle. your very own moon, soothing in her confidence. every step she took was like a landmark for you to follow.
if you strain yourself a little, she appears before you — a polaroid dug out from the depths of your memories.
in almost microscopic detail, you can see her smile, the way the light reflected off her teeth. you can feel her hand, the way her fingers curled so perfectly around yours. you can see her, hear her, the colour of her eyes, the sound of her laughter. a moonlit girl, who left you all alone — walking ahead of you, always ahead, leaving you behind to catch up. bringing whispered secrets with her, soft bouts of laughter.
your one and only best friend.
(it’s not fair.)
something in you urges you to keep talking. it’s all you have it in you to do. and maybe it’s weird, maybe you’re crazy — to talk to someone who can’t hear you. less than a ghost.
but it’s nice. it’s comforting. it reminds you of the voicemails you would leave each other, on weekends you were both too busy to speak on the phone. her voice always came out a little fractured, from her shitty nuclear bomb of an iphone, but you strained your ears to hear every word she said. you always, always did.
(it was nice.)
so you continue. you tell her everything, and then some more. talking and talking, about you, about her, about satoru. by the time you’re done, the sun is getting ready to descend, painting the sky a bleeding orange. your voice has gone hoarse, eyes red and puffy from all the crying, but your chest feels a little lighter — the hole inside it a little more narrow, not as broken and split and jagged.
”so, well,” you clear your throat, finishing your one-sided conversation; smiling weakly. ”i guess what i’m trying to say is… i loved you this year, too.”
the smile on your face is tearstained, feeble, as you get back up on shaky legs, brushing petals and dust off the fabric of your pants. stretching your arms out.
”i’ll be back,” you promise, the same oath every single year. ”wait for me.”
one last look at her grave is all you allow yourself; soaking in the peace and quiet, the creamsicle sky framing it. parting with this sight always feels so strange. crossing the boundary, going back to a world where she’s dead and gone. discarding her so callously.
but you can’t keep satoru waiting, anymore. you promised him you’d get back before sunset.
when you begin your descent down the hill, you can’t help but look back — just one look, just in case she’s standing there. she never is, but you still spare a glance over your shoulder, every single time. you like to think of it as an act of love.
it doesn’t feel as all-consuming, anymore, that exhausting numbness. the sorrow is still there, the grief is still there; but it’s a little less unendurable. and you feel that you can return to reality for another year, until you need to come back and cry some more.
for now, you can manage.
(but you still have one big obstacle to deal with.)
it doesn’t take long to get back.
as your fingers curl around the doorknob, you mentally prepare yourself. taking a shaky inhale. satoru definitely won’t be happy — you can already picture the frown he’ll have on his face, his crossed arms. the neverending flurry of huffs and scoffs.
you’ll just have to bear with it. exhaustion crawls beneath your skin, and everything feels a little too heavy for you to bear without breaking. normally, you’d head straight to bed, squeezing your eyes shut in an attempt to coax the day into ending early. but you can’t pull something like that, today. not when satoru will be there to see it. you can only hope he’ll be understanding — even without knowing anything.
(such an unfair thing to ask of a person.)
the door creaks open, and you step inside.
a particular scent engulfs you, as soon as you cross the threshold to your apartment. a blend between sunlight, and the fabric softener he likes, and freshly squeezed fruit juice. and, of course, that certain aroma you can only ever describe as home.
it smells like satoru, too. then again, maybe that’s just the scent of home in disguise.
finally, the weight around your shoulders starts to crumble. it’s a little easier to breathe, like this, a weighted blanket of comfort around you. something sweet and soothing and smelling lightly of rosemary. peace — or as close to it as you can get, today.
a sigh pushes past your lips; heavy with fatigue. dripping with relief.
(you’re home.)
”well, well, well.”
— a moment passes.
the sudden noise makes you freeze up, eyes wide and alert, still in the process of kicking off your shoes. internally wincing, bracing yourself. here it comes.
slowly, hesitantly, you raise your gaze from the floor — locking eyes with a certain man.
satoru looks displeased, to say the very least. arms crossed, with a cute little frown playing on his lips. just as you imagined. you can’t see his eyes from behind his shades — but if you could, you’re sure they’d carry a sense of betrayal.
”… hi, sato —”
”i can’t believe you.”
an amused breath slips from your lips. amused, but sheepish, awfully nervous. like you just came home to an angry wife, after promising to be back early from work. and satoru only huffs, staring you down like you just killed his dog.
”betrayed. deserted. by my own partner,” he scoffs, shaking his head in obvious disapproval. ”what, are you done with your errand now?”
”satoru,” you try, voice falling into a melodic lilt. smiling up at him, inching closer. to your surprise, he takes a step back.
(you must have really upset him.)
a sad smile. you exhale, wringing your hands together. ”… i’m sorry i left you.”
”you should be,” he pouts, voice wounded to a degree that must be at least a little bit exaggerated. ”and you said you were just going to the bathroom.”
you let out a small, guilty chuckle. he remembers that? ”i’m really sorry. i left you the note, though…”
”right. the note,” satoru scoffs, like the word itself is personally offensive. ”d’you know how awful i felt, seeing that first thing in the morning? no sign of you anywhere, and some silly note is supposed to make up for it?”
oh, he’s being so unfair. looking so disgruntled, tapping the pads of his fingers on his elbow. you wish you could take him seriously, but he’s way too endearing. and he won’t let you get a word in.
”i was so worried. i thought someone had kidnapped you.” satoru doesn’t let up, even when an amused chuckle leaves your lips. ”you turned your phone off and everything! what were you even doing?”
”i know, i know. i’m sorry, really. i am!” you hang up your coat, brushing off a leftover cherry petal. ”it was a personal thing, like i said. but i dealt with everything now, so it’s fine.”
”that’s not an answer,” he mutters. ”you’re really not gonna tell me?”
a pang of guilt hits your heart.
”… sorry,” you murmur, low and feeble. avoiding his gaze. ”some other time, okay?”
satoru only lets out another spiteful scoff, arms still crossed. you wonder if he’s holding himself back from hugging you, or if he really is so angry with you that he doesn’t want you near him.
”look, toru —” you try, again, molding your voice into something soft and sweet. ”i’m really sorry. i won’t do it again, okay? and i’ll make it up to you.”
you hold up a paper bag, waving it slightly to get his attention. you can tell that it works. ”look. i got you your favorite pastries.”
satoru’s frown remains, despite the sweet treats. he must be angrier than you thought. ”really? you think some cookies will be enough to make things right?”
so stubborn. you suppose it’s warranted, though. you know how satoru is — if you’re not by his side for an extended amount of time, he starts to mope. after a while, he starts feeling lonely.
and then, finally, he starts to get anxious.
he’s told you, before, how much these days mean to him; days when the two of you can stay in and relax, and watch silly tv shows, and cook dinner, and fall asleep in each other’s arms. days when he can just be your toru, and no one else. your personal splotch of sunshine.
of course he’d be upset.
(you really are cruel, keeping him in the dark like this.)
seeing him so grumpy makes you oddly happy, though. just his presence makes that suffocating feeling in your chest feel a little more bearable, easing the burden on your restless heart. he makes you feel vulnerable.
with a thud, the paper bag drops to the floor. you open up your arms, like a blooming flower, a sheepish little smile on your lips. ”i missed you?”
the words are tinted with honey, sweet and warm, but also kind of sad. you tilt your head to the right, slightly, a silent invitation into your arms.
and for a second, something unreadable sparks in satoru’s eyes, hidden behind the black of his shades. you still notice it, though — almost as if his whole face pauses for a second. in clever contemplation.
you wonder if he noticed it, then. your puffy eyes, the sagging of your shoulders; the fatigue seeping off you, sticking to your skin.
you wonder if that’s why he relents, finally, stepping closer to bring you in for a hug.
the moment your head meets his chest, you’re enveloped by his scent. strawberries and fresh laundry, and a hint of expensive cologne. home.
a sigh leaves your lips, deep and content. you clutch onto the fabric of his shirt, melting into the embrace — and satoru can’t really bring himself to be too angry, anymore.
”… well, i guess i could forgive you,” he muses, arms securely wrapped around your waist. you’re sure he’s trying to sound stern, but it’s not very convincing when he’s snuggling into you like this. ”but you’re gonna have to make it up to me. alright?”
”right, right,” you exhale, smiling. just thankful to be close to him, to feel that he’s there. ”thank you, oh benevolent satoru.”
a chuckle slips from his lips. you feel it; the low tremor running through his chest, rumbling, as he rests his jaw on your head. ”careful with the snark. if you want to be forgiven you gotta be nice to me, sweetheart.”
you let out a breath, somewhere in between an exasperated sigh and a fond giggle. he’s relieved to hear the sound. satoru prides himself on being observant — being able to read someone with a single glance, notice if something’s off almost instantly. and he’s especially proud of his observant nature when it comes to you.
as clear as the blue of the sky, or the brightness of the sun, satoru can tell that something’s wrong. he noticed it the moment he read that note, the moment you stepped back into the house, the moment he saw your meek little face staring up at him — desperate for comfort. as if one wrong touch could have you falling apart, shattering, like a flimsy sheet of glass.
whatever you were doing, today… it couldn’t have been pleasant.
he’s curious, of course, and still more than a little irked at your escape — but that can wait until later. satoru can be patient, when he wants to be. at the very least, he can be patient when it comes to you.
(for now, he’ll focus on cheering you up.)
nuzzling further into his chest, you take a deep breath, basking in the familiar sensation creeping up on you. satoru makes a halfhearted attempt to stifle his coo.
”aw, look at you,” he grins, swaying you softly side to side. ”so clingy. you really did miss me, huh?”
a huff leaves your lips. ”shut up,” you mumble, feeling a heat rush to your cheeks.
”be nice, baby.”
…
and you relent. the least you could do is indulge him, even if you know he’ll abuse the opportunity fully. you part your lips, and speak.
”… of course i missed you.”
”there we go,” a smug grin blooms on his lips. he rubs your back, absentmindedly. gosh, he’s infuriating.
(you love him so much you want to sneak into his chest and gobble up his heart.)
after a moment, he pulls away from you. just a little, just to get a good look at your face. drinking you in, with his blue-soaked gaze, as your eyelashes flutter. he reaches out, the pads of his fingers meeting your soft skin — cupping your cheek with his palm, big and warm, cradling you the way a believer would cup a mouthful of holy water.
then he leans in to kiss you. giving you no time to prepare, drawing you in, drawn to your touch, inexplicably. helplessly.
it’s a chaste kiss, light and heart-fluttering. his lips are soft, tasting lightly of cherry chapstick. when you exhale against them, you feel him smile, almost smirking. a blissful little breath that he drinks in, hands squeezing softly at your hips, bringing you just a little closer. rubbing his nose against yours.
his tongue flits out to lick at your bottom lip, a teasing flick, and then he’s pulling back — still close enough to make you flustered.
”missed you too,” he purrs, voice deep and raspy, rumbling through his chest. ”thought i was gonna go insane without you.”
with a flushed face, and something akin to a pout playing at your lips, you avoid his gaze. you’re sure that if you looked now, you’d see those pools of blue peeking out beneath the black glass.
satoru leans in to kiss you, again. giving you no warning, as always; unable to resist the temptation.
(you really are too cute for your own good.)
it’s a little intoxicating, the way he breathes you in. sweet and warm, like he’s trying to say i love you without using any words, with just his lips and lungs and tongue. he’s a little too good at it — someone so inexperienced has no business being so naturally good at kissing. it’s a little irritating.
but that’s satoru, for you. always surpassing your expectations; like there’s no limit to his love.
satoru finally decides to spare you, satisfied with the tiny squeak that bubbles up in your throat when he nibbles at the flesh of your lip. he’ll demand more kisses later — preferably when you’re seated in his lap, and he can properly turn you into a boneless puddle.
”alright,” he chirps, a melodic lilt to his voice, stepping back with a palm still on your hip. his thumb rubbing circles into the fabric. ”let’s see those pastries.”
”oh. right…” you’re quick to lean down, snatching the paper bag from where it lays on the floor. passing it to satoru, so he can look into it.
seemingly satisfied with the contents, he lets out a contemplative hum. ”okay, this is a start,” he nods, decisive. ”c’mon. let’s eat ’em by the couch.”
…
you narrow your eyes, suddenly suspicious. ”… hang on. have you had lunch yet?”
satoru gapes, as if in disbelief, barking out a soft, offended little scoff. ”really? you’re doubting me?”
”that’s not a yes.”
a pout forms on his lips. ”of course i have. who do you think i am?”
”oh yeah?” you give him a smile, a tiny raise of your brow. something in you knows that he’s lying. ”what’d you eat?”
”what is this, an interrogation?” he huffs. ”i’m a grown man. i can eat what i want!”
”not when i’m around,” you deadpan. then sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. ”satoru, you can’t eat a bunch of sweets for lunch. it’s not good for you.”
”so you can abandon me for hours, but i can’t have a little treat every once in a while? is that how it is?”
a roll of your eyes. you shift on your feet, letting out a low groan, and satoru has to reel in his growing smile. ”alright, drama queen. i get your point.” a moment passes, and you hum. ”… want me to make you something? or should i just order take out?”
satoru pouts, again, like a big huffy dog. ”babe, don’t you trust me? i’ve already had lunch. i got yakitori from the place downtown!”
”oh? you mean the yakitori place that’s closed on sundays?”
”huh. that’s weird,” he muses, smiling faintly. ”must’ve been some other place, then.”
you give him an unamused look. he returns it with a vague upturn of his lips, completely unbothered.
a sigh.
”… i’ll order take out.”
”whatever you say, princess.”
you stifle a smile, and go digging for your phone, feeling your own stomach rumble a bit. in the midst of the banter, you almost forget what day it is.
and satoru feels satisfied. you look a little more alive, now. a little more anchored to reality. as you call the takeout place of your choosing, he can even spot some earnest light in your eyes. he’s not exactly worried — but you did seem oddly stiff, just now, a little blurry. faded at the corners, like a dusty old polaroid.
and if there’s one thing satoru gojo can’t do, it’s leave you alone when he knows you need him.
satoru’s punishment for leaving him alone so long is swift and severe.
you’re seated in his lap, caged in by his long arms, and this time you know there’s no escaping them. even if you could, you wouldn’t dare to try. being caged in like this, warm and comfy in satoru’s embrace, isn’t really much of a punishment at all — even the kisses he has you press against his lips and jaw aren’t unwelcome, albeit a little embarrassing. he’s a merciful tyrant.
but you can’t help but feel like you’re deceiving him.
you still feel so lost, somehow, a murky sensation you can’t seem to shake off. and you know it’s because of your brain, because of the correlations it’s stitching and crocheting between today and her and you.
it simply won’t let you be happy, today.
you can���t help but feel a little greedy. ungrateful. even though you have your precious sun with you, even though you should feel warm, her absence hangs heavy on you. her continued absence, in your world, your life. a chill that rots your bones from the inside out. you know you’ll never get over it. you don’t ever want to get over it. it’s tough, though.
you should be happy, snuggled into your boyfriend’s arms, but her sorrow clings to you. you should be mourning, but his arms feel so secure like this. no reaction feels right, no emotion warranted.
(you really are greedy, aren’t you?)
satoru chuckles, a sound both delighted and amused — snapping you out of your spiraling thoughts. as always.
you’re watching a movie he likes, some cheesy old romcom. you really, really don’t understand his taste. but his commentary is always entertaining. judging by his cute little noise, someone just said something funny — funny to his standards, anyhow.
it’s too tempting to resist. you crane your neck, glancing up at him, wanting to see his face. from this angle, you can spot the blue of his eyes — beautiful and bright, flickering with splotches of pure white. they flit down to meet your own, gleaming with amusement.
”do i have something on my face, baby?” satoru chuckles, leaning forward to get a better look at you, all tucked against his chest. he grins, smooth, handsome; tailor-made to make you flustered. ”you’re staring at me real hard, there.”
(what a tease.
unfortunately for him, you saw this one coming.)
”nah,” you show off a grin of your own, bubbly and teasing. ”you’re just pretty.”
he blinks. a few seconds passes by.
then a smile breaks out across his face. his eyes crinkle softly at the edges, like little petals, snowy bangs gliding against his skin when he tilts his head.
”oh?” he leans closer, hands still keeping you in place, making sure your gaze stays locked onto his. ”so forward. am i really that irresistible?”
there’s something soft in your eyes, something tender in the way your fingers go to touch his skin. a ghost of a caress, paired with your flimsy smile. you look at him like he hung all the stars in the sky, breathing out an exhale. ”… i wouldn’t go that far.”
”aw, don’t be embarrassed,” he lets out a coo. ”come on — tell me i’m pretty again.”
”you liked that, huh?”
satoru flicks your forehead, no real strength behind it, so soft you barely feel it. there’s a certain reprimanding tilt to his voice, teasing as it is. ”be nice.”
he’s lucky you’re feeling too vulnerable to put up a fight. you turn around, to face him properly, squirming in his hold; reaching out to cup his handsome face.
”pretty boy,” you murmur, running your thumb along the expanse of his cheekbone. satoru grins, and your heart thumps loudly in your chest. you can spot earnest giddiness on his features — such a sucker for praise.
blindly, he searches for your other hand, bringing it to his lips. they’re warm, you notice, as he kisses across your knuckles, the tips of your fingers. soft as a feather, tickling your skin. like every peck is a whispered psalm, a silent worship. but it’s light, it always has been — the weight of his boundless adoration. it’s not the heavy kind of love that gods give, not the one you hear about in stories, that always ends in death. satoru’s love isn’t crushing, and it isn’t suffocating. it’s delicate and careful, soft. it reminds you of how sunshine licks at your skin in the morning.
nothing more or less than one human being’s wholehearted love for another; giggles buzzing against your skin, crinkled eyes and mouthfuls of honey. blissful summer days.
(it reminds you of her, but it’s also something entirely different. something you can only ever make sense of when you think of the sun. when every single corner of your home has been doused in sunshine.)
a moment passes. so, so intimate, unbroken by the grief inside your chest. balm to your fractured heart, smoothing across your jagged edges. satoru leans into your palm, into your touch, relishing in the affection you give him. like a bee to a flower, blooming, wilting.
a nagging need tugs at your heartstrings.
(you want to see him. up close.)
although a little unsure, you reach your hands out, slowly, delicately, like approaching a frightened fawn — eager to remove his shades. he makes no move to stop you, so you assume that it’s okay. his eyes flutter open, when you do, white lashes parting like a bird taking flight; crinkled at the corners, overflowing with warmth. like sunshine streaming in through the curtains of your childhood kitchen.
your heartbeat stutters at the sight.
all you can do is stare. transfixed, losing yourself in their calming hue, drinking them in. you sigh; a soft, quiet little sound. ”you’re so pretty.”
…
satoru lets out a breath, tinged with laughter. his eyes are teasing, but warm even still. ”… am i, now?”
”mhm. the prettiest.”
he chokes back another chuckle. hoping you won’t notice the slight flush to his ears, the heat on the back of his neck. he’s grown skilled at keeping a poker face, even when you try to fluster him — but it’s harder when you’re not trying, when it comes to you so easily. when your words are honest.
just when he’s about to turn the tables on you, you duck your head under his jaw. nuzzling into the crook of his neck, inhaling his cologne, craving his warmth, knowing how much it grounds you.
that, and his eyes are just a little too beautiful to stare into for too long. they always see right through you, deep into your soul, into every little nook and cranny of your mind. that undivided attention makes you feel a little meek, like you’re bare and raw before him. like there’s nothing you can hide.
(something in your hollowed-out chest begins to crumble.)
falling silent, you absently fiddle with the hem of satoru’s shirt, resting your forehead against his shoulder. he doesn’t say anything. the room would be silent were it not for that cheesy romcom, still buzzing in the background — you think the main couple just got divorced, again. or did get they married? you can’t really keep track of the plot. you can’t keep track of much at all, right now.
satoru makes you too happy.
so happy you forget what day it is, forget you’re supposed to be mourning. sometimes, you forget she’s even gone at all. as if she’s resting on some summer field, outside of your vision, alive and well.
but she isn’t. you can’t forget that.
guilt. how long has it been part of your life? you don’t know the answer. you’re not sure you want to know. most of the time, it’s all you can feel. guilt, because you’re sitting here, happy, with the love of your life — the most wonderful person you know. guilt, because you haven’t told him what’s going on, because you don’t trust him enough — even though you’d like to think you just don’t want to burden him. you don’t trust anyone enough to let them glimpse into your decaying chest. you’re afraid of the rot. you’re afraid it’ll mold his hand at the slightest touch.
guilt, guilt, guilt — because you’re lucky enough to meet such wonderful people, over and over again, and never quite manage to deserve them.
(having lost its moon, where does a star find solace?)
a hand begins to stroke your head. the weight is a comfort, reassuring, a jolt of warmth trickling down your spine. for a moment, it’s all you can feel.
(— in the warmth of the sun.)
”sleepy?” he murmurs, low and soft. a little teasing, mostly inquisitive, a calm lull of his tongue.
are you? you didn’t really notice, until now. things are starting to feel a little hazy, aren’t they? you feel comfortable, too comfortable, your body aching for a moment of rest, a chance to shut off. sleep, sleep, sleep. don’t think about anything anymore.
satoru notices your sleepy little breaths, the way you gradually soften under his touch, melt into his arms. so he continues to run his hand over your head, petting you gently — knowing it’ll coax you into resting. he’d like you to stay up and binge shows with him all night, but you seem awfully tired. just this once, he’ll let you sleep — the plot was starting to get boring, anyhow. the sequel’s way better.
”you can rest, baby,” he coos, with a gentle intonation. his voice buzzes in your ear. ”i’ve got you.”
(he’s got you.)
the words make you feel so horribly, awfully safe. you can already feel yourself drifting away. his hand smooths down your hair, and a yawn slips from your lips, and you’re just so, so tired. how nice it would be, for the day to end. to be able to forget, for another year.
yeah. how nice.
you wonder why you don’t take the opportunity.
maybe it has something to do with satoru. with the way he seems to bring you back to reality so effortlessly, soothes you without even really trying. maybe it’s the way he bares himself in front of you, blue eyes on full display, allowing you to see every single part of him.
maybe, it makes you want to do the same.
”… satoru?”
your voice sounds meek. tiny, unguarded. the man in question only hums, feeling you slump against his shoulder. ”hm?”
”today…” you trail off, unsure how to proceed. you can only think of a certain girl, a certain moon. the melancholy is almost overbearing; it pushes you over the edge. ”i went to a cemetery.”
satoru doesn’t respond. he gives you space to continue, never once halting the motion of his big hand on your head, smoothing down your hair. you gulp, trying to force your dry throat to make sounds.
”… my best friend is buried there. she died today. a couple years back… so i —” a coldness crawls under your skin, words hollow as they leave your lips.
”… you know.”
”yeah. i figured.”
a blink. your eyelashes flutter, in surprise — you can’t see satoru’s face, with the way you’re pressed up against him, but you still look up.
what tipped him off, you wonder?
you believe him. satoru has a way of seeing through you, one way or another, always more observant than you give him credit for. he’s tactful, in how he brings it up, and that slumbering maturity he tries to hide comes into view. there’s no judgement in his tone, no pity — only understanding.
”… oh,” is all you can mutter. dumbfounded.
”i’m sorry. about her.”
”don’t be,” you murmur, managing a soft shake of your head. ”i’m — i’m sorry i didn’t tell you. i just wanted to go there alone, and… deal with it? i guess.”
after a brief pause, you keep going. feeling so, so small. but satoru holds you so tenderly. a whisper slips past your lips, dripping with longing.
”… you’d have liked her.”
”what was she like?” comes his reply, instantaneous.
…
huh.
your mouth opens, but nothing comes out. your mind spins in circles, but nothing happens.
(what was she like?)
”… i really loved her.”
satoru lets out a breath. vaguely amused, but he isn’t smiling. his words have a kindness to them; an understanding, more than anything. ”that’s all, huh?”
a slight intake of breath.
— then you bring yourself to think of her.
you think of her face, how her lips curled up into a smile when you tripped over air, the splotches of sunlight reflecting off her white teeth. you think of her laughter, how it always echoed in your head, how she took your hand in hers when you were too scared to walk ahead alone — taking the first step so you wouldn’t have to. a whole human being, multifaceted, enough traits and quirks to fill the whole night sky.
your moon. your eurydice. the only one who understood you.
you loved her a lot.
”… when i was with her, even sitting around and doing nothing made me happy.” nostalgia seeps into the whisper, like warm honey clogging up your throat, choking you. ”just her being there made every day feel like a good one.”
satoru doesn’t say anything. but he holds you, and he doesn’t let go. even when your voice begins to waver.
”i guess that’s… how i’d describe her.” a small breath. then a smile, even smaller. rueful, but it’s there, and it means everything. ”i’d do anything to have that yesterday back.”
satoru stays silent.
you’ve spoken about her, before. he knows some things. not a lot. he knows she’s important to you; the person who shaped you into who you are, your very best friend. he tries to picture her, inside his mind.
you let out a tiny sigh, your lungs feeling empty of air. ”… i’m sure you two would have gotten along.”
”yeah,” he hums, palm smoothing down your back. stifling the thought that threatens to sneak into his mind — you wouldn’t have gotten along with him, but i would’ve wanted you to. ”i’m sure we would have.”
it’s a little too sweet to be true. but it makes you happy, just to imagine that kind of reality — the two of them, together. satoru would tease her, and she’d ignore him, hiding a smile behind her palm. she’d warm up to him eventually. they’d bicker over who knew you best, and demand your own verdict —
you’d smile, not saying a thing.
your voice has gotten a little shaky. it’s scary, opening yourself up for him to see; it feels a little like being sewn open. but you force yourself to keep going. satoru rubs your back through it all, soothingly.
(he’s so, so proud of you.)
”i was thinking…” you trail off, gaze fixed on satoru’s shirt, fingers gripping the smooth fabric. ”maybe, some time in the future — i mean, if you want to — you could… come with me? maybe?”
silence.
”you don’t have to say yes. but if you do want to —”
”i do.”
satoru’s voice is absolute. there isn’t any room for doubt; he makes sure of that. ”i’d like to meet her.”
… oh.
it was that easy, huh?
(you wonder what you could have possibly done to deserve him.)
”… okay,” you mumble, meekly, breath fanning over his skin. ”next year, then.”
satoru glances down at you. curled up against him, nearly sleeping, looking a lot less burdened than before — though there’s still a desperation in the way you lean into his touch, a silent terror, like you could drift away if he doesn’t keep you close. satoru wants to fix it. he wants to run his hands across your skin, stitch the scars life has left you with, even if his touch could never be as gentle as he’d like it to be. he wants to be tender.
but there’s no fixing grief. it lingers, always, no matter how much you try to scrub it away. even if you run a washcloth over your skin until it starts to bleed, the scent still remains.
and there’s a sickening sense of comfort in the knowledge that it always will.
(there’s no getting rid of him, satoru knows. and deep down, he’s glad that it’s true.)
more than anything else — satoru is content. content in the knowledge that you trust him, that you can bring yourself to open up to him about something so personal. that you chose to tell him, even though he gave you a way out. something about it makes him feel almost overwhelmed with affection. the kind he can’t bear not to show you, the kind that makes him seek you out almost subconsciously; seeking out your touch, your laughter. the smile on your face.
and maybe, just maybe — it makes him want to be a little more open with you, too.
”yeah,” he murmurs, craning his neck to leave a kiss on the crown of your head. ”you can sleep, baby. we’ll talk more about it tomorrow, okay?”
”… i’m sorry for leaving you this morning,” you whisper, suddenly. a little meek. ”i felt really bad.”
satoru chuckles. raspy, an amused little breath. ”you’re forgiven, honey,” he coos. ”just don’t do it again, hm? might break my heart.”
with a yawn, you loop your arms around his neck, nuzzling further into his warmth. fighting the urge to close your eyes. drowsiness washes over you all at once, as if it was waiting for you to get the last of your worries off your chest. ”… i love you.”
”i love you too,” comes his reply, a smile tugging at his lips. ”my sweet girl.”
it’s hard to resist the temptation. almost impossible, with how warm satoru feels, your eyes helplessly fluttering close. you were supposed to stay up with him — you haven’t even finished eating. and you didn’t finish his awful romcom.
but he runs his hands over your head, and down your back, and it’s simply too hard to withstand the temptation. so you close your eyes, just for a second —
and that’s all it takes.
satoru keeps petting you, softly, until he’s sure you’re asleep, soft little breaths falling from your parted lips, drool slipping down your chin. he’ll forgive you for staining his shirt, just this once. with you in his lap, sound asleep, he feels himself soften — hands running down your back, rubbing circles into your skin. cradling you closer and closer, ensuring that you’re comfortable. taking a few sneaky pictures, that he’ll tease you about tomorrow —
(though in reality, he just wants to be able to look at them whenever he wants.)
even while eating, romcom flickering on and on, all he can think about is you. how you look so pretty sleeping against him, how you trust him enough to let him see you at your lowest. how you trust him to take care of you, run his fingers across the scars etched into your soul. even if it does no good, even if his touch is clumsy at best — that act of trust alone sets his heart aflutter.
he wonders what he could have possibly done to deserve this happiness.
”well, here we are.”
satoru holds a bouquet of flowers in his arms, putting it down on the grave, crouching down next to you.
a sigh leaves your lips.
”… this still feels a little surreal,” you admit, sparing a glance at the man to your left. ”sure you’re not a little freaked out?”
”nah. don’t mind me, just do your thing.”
”that’s… easier said than done,” you murmur, arranging the flowers for the grave. asters and forget-me-nots, haberleas and hydrangeas.
a hum buzzes in his throat. ”well, what do you usually do when you’re here?”
”i… talk to her, i guess…?” you gnaw at your bottom lip, turning your face away. you feel a little awkward, admitting it out loud, but if satoru finds it weird he’s frighteningly good at hiding it.
all he does is take a step back, as if giving space for your words to fit in. respectful, accommodating. so smooth you barely notice it. ”then talk.”
”… i can’t do that with you here.”
”eh? why not?”
”because — i just can’t, okay?” you let out a huff, averting your gaze, shying away from him. ”whatever. i’m just gonna do it in my head. she’ll have to manage.”
satoru turns his head, looking down at the city skyline below you as you clasp your hands together. when he looks back, he sees you mouthing something, no sound coming out — and decides to leave you be.
the grave is well kept. he wonders how many visits you’ve managed to sneak past him, in the years that he’s known you. he wonders if it’s supposed to feel this foreign, being here, staring down at something he knows must mean the world to you. the grave of your very best friend. someone who holds a piece of your heart, a side of you he never got to see.
he’ll have to make a good first impression.
satoru clasps his hands together, too. and he speaks, silently, with no words; lips pursed in a tight line.
(hi, there. it’s nice to meet you.)
it’s not like he has no experience of talking to the dead, himself. he’s more than acquainted with one-sided conversations, lonely visions of boys with black hair, men with sad smiles. framed by the setting sun.
so it doesn’t feel too odd.
satoru talks. about this, about that. he tries to keep it professional. this is important to you, so by nature, it’s important to him. the conversation comes to a close, and he looks at the grave with an unreadable expression — hands still clasped in silent prayer.
(i promise to take care of them.)
a sniffle.
satoru glances over at you, just as you turn away — trying to hide from him. but he knows. he’ll always, always know when you need him most.
two strong arms curl around your waist, stabilizing you, anchoring you to earth. ”i’ve got you,” he whispers, and you fall into his embrace. allowing him to pick up the pieces, to put you back together. ”i’ve got you.”
”i —” your voice breaks apart, crumbles into stardust, a shuddering breath that escapes from the back of your throat. there’s nothing to see through your tears. ”i miss her so much.”
satoru cradles you close to his chest, tucking you under his chin. ”i know,” he soothes. your little sobs leave his heart with a bitter feeling, and he wishes he could make them disappear; but he knows you need this.
when he holds you, something brushes against the fabric of your clothing. the soft thrumming of his heartbeat. something alive, deep within his chest, something for you to ground yourself with. and you know it was intentional, on his part — the decision to press your hearts together, a promise he doesn’t have to find the words for, because you know.
(stay alive for me. i’ll stay alive for you.
when you can’t breathe properly, i’ll be here to do it for you.)
your tears stain his brand-new coat, but he doesn’t care. all he cares about is you, the fact that you’re crying, how to properly comfort you. it’s new to him, all of it, everything about you is just so new and he’s so afraid of messing it all up again —
but he holds you close. murmuring, right by your ear, endless sweet nothings. he waits for you to get it all out of your system, and he doesn’t let you go.
when you finally collect yourself, thoroughly tired out, eyes red and puffy — satoru smiles. it’s brighter than the sun, positively life-envoking. it gives you something to hold on to. he parts his lips.
”thank you for bringing me here.”
a shake of your head. soft, as he thumbs away your tears, one by one. ”thank you for coming with me,” you smile, small as it is, holding onto his hands. feeling the warmth of his skin, the smoothness of his palm.
after saying your farewells, and promising to come back next year, the two of you begin your trek down the mountain trail. hand in hand. it’s mostly silent, but not at all in a bad way. satoru knows when to be serious, and when not to be. today, he knows you’re especially fragile — he wouldn’t dare overstep.
(especially when he knows your pain so well.)
”hey,” you break the silence. ”thank you, really. for… well, everything.”
satoru brushes you off, with a light squeeze of your hand. ”don’t mention it. i’m your boyfriend, aren’t i?”
”it’s not about that,” you chuckle, an embarrassed smile on your lips. ”just… thank you for existing, i guess. i love you a lot.”
…
satoru hums.
if he were any other person, maybe he’d respond with something just as sincere — something to let you know exactly how much you mean to him, how you make his world brighter just by being in it. how you mend scars he didn’t even know he had, as effortlessly as brushing a strand of hair away from your face. how you remind him of a certain boy, but also something entirely different; a love so light it makes him feel human.
but he’s satoru gojo — and so he has to do things in a more roundabout way.
”hey,” he starts, with a soft click of his tongue. ”next christmas. are you free?”
you blink up at him, with a tilt of your head. ”… of course. we always do something on christmas, right?”
”no, i don’t mean that.”
another tilt of your head. satoru hums, low and contemplative, humming quietly.
”eh,” he flicks his hand, waving you off. ”you’ll see.”
”… okay?”
silently, you study his expression, hoping to find some sort of hint that’ll give away the meaning of his words. you can’t find anything except a carefree smile, his eyes still obscured by his shades — hidden from you and the rest of the ghosts.
you suppose it doesn’t really matter. satoru seems happy; and, really, that’s all you could ask for.
so you only tug him closer, greedy for his warmth, basking in the feeling of it enveloping you. protecting you from the chilly air.
satoru closes his eyes, and takes a deep breath.
(a boy with black hair smiles behind his eyelids.)
#gojo x reader#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#gojo angst#gojo hurt/comfort#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x y/n#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk hurt/comfort
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ELECTRIC TOUCH — [jason grace dating headcanons]
author's note: i need 2024 to be THE year. 2023 did me soooo dirty. im praying
dating JASON GRACE would be like dating someone from a regency era romance novel…he’s just SUCH a hopeless romantic but he would rather die than admit it.
in the initial first few weeks of dating, jason was sosososooooo shy about pda/physical touch. it’s not that he was uncomfortable, he LOVES physical touch, but he had just gone so long without it that he wasn’t used to it. but eventually, he warms up to it…and now he can’t go without having at least one part of him touching you 😭
when it came to things like hugs, kisses, handholding, etc. jason would always wait for you to initiate it because he was so anxious about making you uncomfortable ?? fjsldfjs
but when you communicated that he didn’t need to ask/wait for you all the time, jason started initiating things more. even still, he occasionally gets nervous to even hold your hand? like wdym you’ve been dating for over six months and you still get nervous doing simple couple things 😭 it’s very endearing though
chivalry is NOT dead,, and it’s because of jason LMAO. he’s the type to swap shoes with you even though you’re wearing heels that are 3x too small for him, but hey, at least your feet don’t hurt anymore!
jason’s also hellbent on carrying things for you, opening doors for you, pulling out/pushing in chairs for you, etc… GOD HE’S SO CUTE.
since dating him, you don’t think you’ve ever touched a single door or car handle when he’s with you.
jason is NOT afraid to advocate or stand up for you, especially if you’re more on the quiet & non-confrontational side. if you’re in a group setting and someone interrupts you, he’s making sure you get your chance to say what you wanted to say. and he doesn’t do it in a way that leaves you embarrassed, he’s very very classy with it!
if you’re a big music person, jason will literally learn your favorite artist’s entire discography so you guys have another thing to talk about.
you guys also have a shared playlist of “your songs” and he’s so serious about it 😭 if jason hears a song that even remotely reminds him of you, he’s going to the ends of the earth to figure out what it’s called.
rip to anyone around him if shazam doesn’t work! he’s gonna send voice messages to your big group chat humming the tune, but he’s so tone deaf that no one knows the song…and his search history is just variations of “song that goes du du ooh du ooh du du ooh” a for effort though babes…
jason’s love languages are definitely acts of service and quality time. over the years and throughout the many battles he’s fought, he’s come to realize that all he wants to do when he comes home is just spend time with his loved ones.
after a busy day, you’ll come home to find your laundry folded, bed sheets washed & freshly made, along with a sweet little note from jason <3
your guys’ thing are writing notes to each other. considering his and your busy schedule, you’ll write and leave tiny notes around the house for each other to find. it’s one of the many reasons why jason gets up in the morning.
he loves coming home to you after a long day to simply melt in your arms. there’s just something so soothing about cuddling with you after a busy day.
it does not matter where you are, you guys could literally be cleaning the camp toilets and he’d still be able to find the fun in it. you’re his home, and he’d follow you wherever you go.
if you play sports, you already know he’s showing up to ALL your games. it doesn’t matter if it’s pouring rain or if it’s hours away, he’s absolutely determined to show his support. jason even makes posters with your jersey number and when you have big tournaments he’ll show up with posters of your face 😭 the refs are SO tired of jason help
i feel like if he really tried, jason would be a good cook.
one day you sent him a recipe you saw online saying you wanted to make it with him, but then he decided to make it himself to surprise you. and it was actually so good???
JASON IN A “KISS THE COOK” APRON OMFG. that’s what you got him for his birthday and every single time without fail, he’ll wear it when he’s cooking.
one of his hidden talents is that he’s super good at origami. he originally picked it up because he heard it was a good stress reliever, but now he also does it for you <3
he loves your reaction when he gives you little paper rings or an origami version of your favorite animal!
this guy DREAMS of domesticity. he’s always been the type to date to marry, and that’s just what he intends to do with you! even though you guys are still young, he’s been planning your proposal sfjfls
tell me why he already knows what kind of ring he wants to get you… omg.
he really wants to just settle down with you in new rome. but honestly, he’s willing to do anything as long as you’re at his side.
expect flowers from jason at least once a month! he even keeps one flower so he knows when it’s time to get you a new bouquet. and if he’s away, he’ll get one of his friends to deliver it!
i have this headcanon that the aphrodite cabin teams up with the hephaestus cabin to throw a really elaborate party, essentially like prom. anyways, jason would go all out for your promposal jfdsls i feel like he would either do a super funny poster/proposal like y’know that one guy who did that medieval promposal 😭 yeah well jason would do something like that but like...more roman... LMFAO him pulling up to your place in a chariot
or he would do something super super intricate and planned out…like a fancy picnic and then he’d have the fauns arrange fireflies to spell out “prom?” when it’s dark out.
ugh! jason grace the man that you are… <3 best bf ever,, i can confirm btw
#jason grace#jason grace x reader#jason grace x y/n#jason grace x you#jason grace fanfiction#jason grace fanfic#jason grace fluff#jason grace fic#percy jackson#percy jackson x reader#heroes of olympus#heroes of olympus x reader#rick riordan#riordanverse#percy jackson fandom#percy jackson headcanon#percy jackson fic#percy jackson fanfiction
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omg what if basketball!rafe takes reader out to dinner after a game or something, from sleeping with the enemy’s pleaseee
AHH SO CUTE YES OFC 🙂↕️
based on this fic
they keep hooking up after their first night together and rafe is in shock over how good the sex is and how much he enjoys her company. he’s a ‘hit it and quit it’ type of guy but he cannot get enough of her to the point where he can hardly wait for games against her college’s team because it’s a promise that he’ll see her.
one night a few weeks after they start being friends with benefits, his team suffers a loss by a few points against their worst rivals. he’s seething. the result of a game has a crazy effect on him. it always does.
he finds her courtside and while everyone around her is celebrating, she goes still once she notices him approaching her.
“close game,” she says, tilting her head while she looks up at him. at this point, she knows well enough how hard losses hit him.
eyes are on them. she can feel people judging how close she’s gotten to her side of the rivalry’s most hated athlete, but she doesn’t care.
rafe can tell she’s trying to make him feel better. underneath their usual harsh sarcasm and jokey insults, they’re two people who have a friendship built on sincere compatibility.
“your refs should be fired,” he mutters, pissed at how many calls against his opponents were missed. he’s sweaty and breathless from the game, his chest rising and falling at full tilt.
“oh, i’ll personally see to it,” she jokes. he scoffs, hating that he can’t stifle his smile.
“be ready in an hour,” rafe tells her. “i’ll pick you up from your dorm.”
“for what?”
“dinner,” he says assertively.
before he leaves, he pulls her in for a kiss. it’s a bonus that her ex sees. when she told him she wasn’t interested in max anymore, rafe couldn’t believe how relieved he was. he may have lost the game, but he won the girl.
rafe typically lays into his teammates after a bad loss. he’s a harsh captain but the guys respect him for it. but that night, he’s uncharacteristically quiet in the locker room. he’d never admit it to anyone, but knowing he’ll see her after this makes his anger lose its power.
she’s surprised that the restaurant he picked is as elegant as it is. she knows he came from money, but this place is nice. as they settle across from each other in a booth, she’s glad she dressed up.
“i didn’t say this,” she says, looking down at her menu, “but you’re right. the refs missed a lot of travelling on our side.”
“what?” rafe says, amused. “whatever happened to loyalty?”
“i told you i didn’t say anything,” she reiterates.
he taps his knuckles on the tabletop lightly, studying her.
“you don’t have to bullshit me,” he tells her.
“rafe,” she says seriously. “when do we ever bullshit each other?”
he meets her gaze, taking in how pretty she looks tonight. they’re just friends but on the outside, this looks like a date. he doesn’t mind.
“and you need to chill with the pushing,” she tells him. “you almost got fouled out.”
“did i?” he says with a laugh. he knows he did. he finds quite a lot of sick satisfaction in shoving his opponents.
“shut up,” she chuckles. “you won’t be laughing when you get benched.”
“don’t want that,” rafe mumbles. “who will you stare at then?”
“you stare at me,” she replies. “you said it yourself the first night we hooked up.”
“why are you thinking about hooking up right now?” he says, looking around the room. “this is a classy place.”
“you’re annoying as hell,” she laughs. “and for that, i’m ordering the most expensive thing. unless you’re not paying?”
“i’m paying,” he confirms. he doesn’t even want to joke about that. “and i’m coming over after.”
“depends on how this date goes,” she quips, looking back down at the menu.
rafe loves how laidback she is. how she can call it a date, but not expect him to be her boyfriend. it’s so easy with her. no expectations. just fun.
he never felt this good this fast after a loss. he doesn’t ever feel this relaxed with anyone. she may just be his best friend at this point.
she looks up, noticing his eyes on her.
“staring again?” she teases.
just a few seconds ago, she asked when they bullshit each other. they never do. he’d like to stick to that.
“yeah. you look good,” he tells her.
her skin flushes hot. she eyes him, the way the dim lighting washes over the planes of his face, the way he put an effort in tonight, dressing in a button-down instead of the usual t-shirt and sweats he wears whenever they meet for a booty call.
“at the risk of stroking your ego, so do you,” she replies.
“what else d’you wanna stroke?”
“jesus christ,” she laughs, nudging his knee under the table. he smirks.
whatever tense feelings were left over from tonight’s loss are gone now. he’s good. happy, even.
#swteblurb#ask#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron and you#rafe cameron and reader#rafe cameron and y/n
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Not So Sneaky (Lia Walti x Reader)
“Vic please just pass the fucking ball” You whine at your best friend, Victoria Pelova. She chuckles in response and passes it back with a bit of flair.
“Show off, keep it for the matches, yeah?” You smirk as she elbows you during some 1v1 practice.
“Foul! Ref!” You say rolling around on the floor pretending to be injured, quickly followed by Victoria attacking your ribs, causing you to burst out laughing.
“Alright love birds, we’ve got an important match to prepare for!” Katie helps you up from the ground after your assault from your best friend. Jonas gets you all to rotate partners and eventually you’re paired up with Lia Wälti, who you’ve been quietly crushing on since you signed for the team at the same time as Victoria during the January transfer window, both coming from Ajax.
“Promise I won’t nutmeg you this time” You joke with Lia as you do your regular training activities. “You better not, I saw what you pulled on Katie earlier” Lia jokes in response, referencing how you nutmegged the co-captain as she was attempting to tackle you earlier on, causing her to be at the end of a lot of jokes so far today.
“Ah, who am I kidding, I can’t resist it, can I?” You wink, going to nutmeg her during your 1v1, with her expertly managing to stop it and successfully nutmegging you in the process. You fake collapsing in shock at how you’d finally been nutmegged by a teammate.
“You…you traitor!” You reach your arm out to Lia as you crawl towards her, as if you are so injured from the ‘embarrassment’ from being nutmegged.
“God you’re so dramatic” She rolls her eyes as she helps you up, instantly you feel the warmth in your body at the contact between the both of you being much closer than you have been before, your chests basically touching. You both stop and are lost looking into each other's eyes for a few moments, until Vic’s cough to your side breaks you out of your trance.
“Was I interrupting something?” Vic raises an eyebrow in your direction suspiciously.
“Nope, I was just helping Y/N up after I finally nutme-” “WOAH! What Lia was saying is that I fell over and she helped me up” You cut in, Lia looks at you even more suspicious than Vic was.
“Okay….weirdo. Y/N are we still going out tonight?” Vic asks you.
“Of course we are, you know I wouldn’t miss out on our Wednesday night date night!” You wiggle your eyebrows suggestively.
“I’m gonna go get changed, I’ll catch you guys later” Lia rushes off.
“What’s her problem?” Katie walks over and asks, seeing Lia jogging off the pitch.
“No idea, we were just talking about mine and Vics wednesday night date night tonight?” You shrug.
“Y/N you idiot, you’ve been flirting with her and then making you and Vic sound like you’re together?” Katie smacks the back of your head.
“Wait what? I don’t get it?” You look at her confused.
“Sorry mate, you need to work this out for yourself, not me” Katie jogs off going after Lia.
“It's okay, we're fine, we're fine.” You sigh.
“Y/N/N maybe it's time you start dropping more hints for her. We can ditch our date night and you can always ask her out instead?” Vic suggests, you tilt your head in confusion.
“But what about our date nights?” You ask.
“Y/N get a grip, we can still hang out but you need to make a move” Vic says sternly. You nod and jog to the changing rooms a few minutes later to find Katie walking out giving you a supportive thumbs up. You walk in to see Lia half dressed and just pulling her shirt over her head, you manage to catch a glance at her toned stomach before panicking and turning away.
“Oh god sorry I didn't mean to walk in on you like this” You panic, visibly flush and flustered. Lia chuckles in response and sits down on the bench, she motions for you to sit in front of her.
“Okay right, I'm nervous as hell but I just have to get it all out. Lia I, I like you, like a lot. I don't know how it started but I've just been kinda admiring you from afar, no wait that sounded creepy. Okay maybe I did but I just, I'm not good with feelings but… I know I really do have feelings for you” You mumble really quickly, nerves getting the better of you.
“But… What about Pelova? You seem to be very close” Lia asks with a somewhat sad expression on her face.
“Oh we aren't together, she's not my type anyway” You laugh.
“Then.. What is your type?” Lia asks suggestively.
You gulp, feeling a sudden rush of confidence flowing through you.
“I'd say my type is brown hair… Likes football, plays for Arsenal, is Swiss, wears number 13–” You get stopped by the midfielders lips crashing into yours. It feels as if your body could go completely limp with how breathtaking her kiss feels, finally after all this time pining. After a few minutes you eventually break away.
“Wow that was…” You say, again with the same flustered face as before.
“Are you free tonight?” She asks.
“Yep! Vic made me cancel our date night so I'd finally ask you out” You chuckle earning a glare and a shove in return.
____
The next morning you wake up with a weight on your chest, Lia’s head resting on it with her hair all over her face. You gently brush her hair out of her face which slowly wakes her up.
“Good morning” You smirk.
“Good morning, I’m sorry if that was a bit much last night” Lia blushes trying to hide her face in her bed covers.
“Lia we literally had a make out session and pizza, it’s not like we had sex on the first date or anything…that’s the third date” You wink, obviously joking.
“God you’re so annoying” She rolls her eyes as she starts getting out of bed, you can’t help but admire her as she stretches, again you find your eyes roaming her body subconsciously until she breaks your focus by moving closer to you.
“You sure you want to wait until the third date?” She says positioning herself on your lap, in her shorts and sports bra.
“Uh…I…Um” You feel your face heating up as the midfielder smirks at you.
“I’m kidding…unless?” She winks, pressing her lips to yours and gently pinning you to the bed.
____
It's been around six months since you and Lia finally made your relationship official, and yet it was still only you two and your families that knew about the relationship. You both decided to keep it quiet for a while as you didn't want people to know, so that you had time to figure stuff out and make sure you didn't let it have any effect on your games, as well as just having some privacy.
Luckily all it had done was make you play better and be in a better mood, no one was suspicious until recently, you had a feeling people were noticing the longing looks you gave each other and the way you'd blush more at team events. You knew you needed to tell someone so today was going to be that day. You were driving Vic to training and she spotted something that you clearly didn't hide as well as you thought.
“Uh… Y/N..? What is that on your neck?” She says poking your very visible hickey on your neck. You instantly blush, having vivid memories of the previous night, hearing the Swiss girl uttering your name all night.
“What are you talking about?” You panic, covering where she is pointing with your hand.
“The hickey Y/N I’m not stupid” She rolls her eyes “No wonder you’ve been less stressed, Y/N/N has been getting laaaaaid” Vic sings.
“Shut up” You groan.
“You gonna tell me who did it, so I can cover this up for you?” She tilts her head at you, motioning with the emergency makeup bag you keep in your car for you and your friends.
“I need you to promise you won't tell anyone” She nods as you pull into the car park, your phone pinging with a message from Lia, which unfortunately is connected to your car.
“One new message from Lia: I got the stuff for dinner tonight! I love you, see you at training x”
“Nevermind you didn’t need to say anything” Vic smirks, giving you a knowing look.
“Uhhhh, me and Lia have just been hanging out?” You say a bit higher pitch than usual.
“You know better than to lie to me Y/N. Why wont you tell anyone?” She sighs at you. You turn the car engine off and sigh, Vic has the makeup brushes at the ready and starts covering your hickey for you.
“Look mate, we were worried it’d change the team dynamic, especially if there’s some weird feelings with her and Caitlin still playing for the same team, and if we get distracted. Basically we’ve had a lot of time privately and it’s been so nice” You ramble.
“Well I don’t think it would or even has changed anything, Caitlin still cares about Lia, but as a friend and I highly doubt there would be any hard feelings y’know? You need to at least tell Jonas or a coach to be safe” She suggests.
“You’re right…” You both get out of your car once she is done applying makeup to your neck, and you head towards the main building, you search around for Jonas and eventually stumble upon him, stuck in conversation with your girlfriend.
“...but what I’m trying to say Jonas is, me and Y/N won’t let it affect how we play or work, if anything I think we’ve improved recently” Lia says.
“Ah Y/N! Great timing, I’m sure you’ve just overheard but Lia told me about your relationship, obviously it’s none of my business but I can tell the difference in how you two have been playing and just in general. Only positive things!” Jonas pats you on the shoulder “I have no issues with it of course, I’m happy for you both for finding each other”.
“Thanks Jonas, means a lot, like really” You give him a hug, the man being somewhat of a mentor to you over the previous year.
“Tell the team when you feel you’re ready. Remember we are a family, we support each other” He says nodding over to the groups of girls in the gym, all getting on with their own thing.
“Yeah maybe we should do it sooner rather than later, no more hiding this” You look at Lia who nods in agreement. You reach out for her hand as you both walk hand in hand into the gym to meet the others, somehow no one saw your intertwined hands. Lia decides to go on a treadmill rather than lift weights with you, so she gives you a kiss on the cheek before walking off. Jen seems to be the only one who spots it and within minutes walks over to you.
“Excuse me, what was that earlier?” Jen looks at you wide eyed.
“What?” You smirk.
“How long has this been going on for then?” She smiles, seeming proud.
“About 6 months, we’ve been pretty private with it and we wanted to make sure we were settled before saying anything” You say.
“Oi did I see Wally kiss you on the cheek? Where’s mine?” Beth comes over and slings her arm over your shoulder.
“Sorry Beth, pretty sure that’s only for her girlfriend” Jen teases.
“Since when?” Beth shouts.
“Why are we yelling over here?” Viv walks over, visibly confused and attempting to hush Beth. Lia takes the opportunity to hop off the treadmill and save you from the commotion. As she gets closer you start smiling over at her.
“Hey beautiful, you looked like you needed rescuing” She smiles reaching for your hand.
“Ah I had it under control, see?” You nod over to the girls you were talking with, who are all now gobsmacked at what they’ve seen and heard.
____
Later on that day you both get ready at Lia’s house, she’s wearing jeans and a crop top with a plaid shirt over the top but not buttoned up. You on the other hand went with a casual hoodie and jeans.
“Darling, do we really have to go out with the girls tonight?” You groan seeing your girlfriend getting ready. “We could just stay at home…” you continue, trailing your finger from her chest to her abs.
“Later, if you’re good” she kisses you hungrily and leaves the bedroom with a wink in your direction, as you audibly groan and flop back onto the bed.
“Come on! Our uber has arrived!” Lia yells from the other room.
“You mean Viv?” You chuckle getting your shoes on.
“Of course, who else?” She laughs.
You get into Viv and Beth’s car. You and Beth spend the journey singing in the back of the car whilst Viv and Lia chat at the front. After a short while you eventually park up and all walk to the venue the team had hired for the night.
You and Lia are still somewhat wary of being affectionate in public, so walk side by side but not hand in hand.
Once you arrive at the club, you get yourself and the others a drink from the bar and return to find everyone crowding around some tables and having their own conversations, you take Beth and Viv their drinks first followed by Lia’s.
“Here you go, gorgeous” You pass her the drink and subtly kiss her cheek, she smiles at you, as you float around, being the social butterfly that you are.
____
A bit later on, after more drinks have been, well drunk, the group are getting rowdier and more daring, literally.
“Katie I dare you to do a backflip off that table” Kyra points over at the table for the Irishwoman to backflip from.
“Nope! Absolutely none of that here” Kim said, patting Kyra on the back with a chorus of boos coming from some of you. Your girlfriend approaches you in the area everyone seems to be dancing in.
“I miss you” She says pouting.
“Babe we’re literally at the same party with our friends, I was standing with you like 15 minutes ago” you say quietly.
“Yeah but I always want to be with you” She frowns.
“Alright if we are still daring people to do shit, I dare Y/N to kiss Vic!” Kyra slurs.
“I don't think that's a good idea, I've got a cold after all” Vic lies, everyone falling for it.
“Fuck who else will she kiss then? Gotta get Y/N out there, she’s been single for way too long” Katie jokes as she makes eye contact with Lia “Wally how about you?” She asks with her usual cocky smirk on her face.
“Sure. It's just a quick peck after all, right?” She smiles.
“OI! Kissing is too easy, I want a dramatic kiss! Make me believe you're in a relationship or something, I don't know!” Jen pipes up sarcastically, smirking at you after finding out about you both earlier in the day. You and Lia look at eachother and shrug as if to say ‘fuck it’.
She leans forward and pulls you in by the hoodie covering your chest. You gulp in response, knowing that you find her even more attractive when she’s being bossy. She passionately kisses you and brings her hands up to the back of your neck whilst you rest yours on her lower back slowly drifting lower.
“Oi you two, save it for the bedroom yeah?” Katie yells to the group, you lift one hand from Lia’s back to raise a middle finger up at Katie hearing a chorus of cheers when you do so. Eventually you break apart, blushing whilst Lia is grinning at your friends who witnessed it.
“Christ it's like you guys are dating or something” Leah says from the side, giving you a wink and head tilt to follow her.
“Right, I'm not as dumb as these idiots, how long?” Leah asks you.
“Around 6 months” You confess seeing a giant grin start to emerge on Leah's face. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, it's just..” She interrupts you.
“Y/N I've had an idea that there was something between you for a little while, and I know it's nice to have privacy and stuff, so I understand” She hugs you, you continue chatting to the side about how you should tell Kim as soon as possible, being the team mum after all. You hear singing get louder as karaoke starts, an idea springing to mind.
“Wait right here I've got a great idea” You say, patting Leah's shoulders and stumbling off. You yell out to Kim, who's watching the karaoke unfold.
“Kim, I'm sorry I haven't told you sooner but me and Wally are seeing each other” You blurt out when you get to her.
“I thought so! You guys seem happy, so I'm happy, ah I feel like a proud parent!” She hugs you tightly. “Have you told many people yet?”.
“No… But I have an idea on how!” You pat Kim’s shoulders as you walk over to the woman running the karaoke for the team and put in your request, but not for you to sing. When it's your song you walk up to take the microphone from Steph who was just belting Untouched by the Veronica's and hand it to Leah, who nods over at your girlfriend standing alone, watching you. You hear the opening notes to Lover by Taylor Swift as you take Lia's hands into yours on the makeshift dance floor.
“This one goes out to the lovers over there” she points at you and Lia before she starts singing.
“I love you” You mumble into her ear as you slow dance together, she responds with a loving kiss which has you both gasping for air afterwards. As you break away from your kiss you notice most of the room's eyes are focused on the two of you, knowing looks and shocked ones too, alongside cheering, whistling and the odd “Go on Y/N!”. You avert your eyes from the girls surrounding you in a circle and focus on the beauty in your arms, her eyes sparkling as she looks up at you.
After you finish dancing you're bombarded with questions from teammates, some a little inappropriate and some very sweet.
“How long has this been going on?” Steph asks.
“Around 6 months, we kept it quiet in an attempt to not mess with the team dynamic” You say. The questions die out and you eventually get to sit back down in a booth with your girlfriend and some of your teammates.
“Okay Lia I hate to be the one to ask it… But Y/N is so clumsy how on earth are you able to…have y’know… Seriously” Vic slurs, your face flushing red.
“Luckily her clumsiness doesn't affect her… Performance” Lia winks at you. Some of the girls are trying to get more details, as you decide to dismiss yourself to get yourself another drink.
“Y’alright?” Katie asks you at the bar.
“They're talking about my sex life so I'm here now” You chuckle, tapping your card to pay for your beer.
“Oh what! Let's go then!” Katie drags you back over to the girls.
“-but yeah she's so attentive and honestly, the best I've had” Lia finishes her sentence as you slide back in, groaning as they're still talking about sex.
“Y/N we've heard it all, no need to be shy. Your turn now anyway” Jen winks jokingly, with Alessia cracking up as you slam your head down onto the table. As you lift your head back up you catch Lia yawning and give her the look of ‘home soon?’.
You walk off again to chat with some of the girls to avoid discussing your sex life, and feel your phone vibrate.
From Lia -
You have been good today… So how about we go home and I show you something I got for you?
“Someones getting laid tonight” Leah smirks at your red face.
“What? No it’s just warm in here” You chuckle.
“Bullshit, I can see Lia giving you ‘the eyes’ from over there” Nodding in the direction of your lover, who was indeed giving you the eyes, causing you to look back down at your phone which Leah is also looking at. “Mate, are you stupid? Go home!” She pushes you towards where Lia is sitting.
“Lee this isn’t necessary” You groan approaching your girlfriend.
“Wally take your girlfriend home, she’s being all awkward” Leah chuckles “Have a good night ladies” she winks as she slides away from you both.
“Right I need to take this one home as she’s a bit too drunk, you guys need a lift?” Viv comes over right on time, you both nod and help her lug Beth back to the car. The short drive eventually ends outside Lia’s house, you say your thanks and goodbyes to the couple as you head into Lia’s house. You shrug off your coat and take off your shoes, but you notice your girlfriend has run upstairs to her bedroom.
“Oh it’s so on Wally” you mumble to yourself as you jog up the stairs, the girl waiting in her room for you.
“Eager are we?” You smirk going over to her.
“Well I did tell you you’d be rewarded so” She smirks, pushing you firmly down onto your bed. You’re usually the one ‘in charge’ but it seems Lia had a different idea tonight as she tells you to stay still. She slowly removes her jacket, putting on quite the show for you. You try to reach out to help her with her clothes but she slaps your hands away.
“Ah ah, no touching” She tuts.
“Right, if you don’t do something soon I’m going to eat you alive” You growl, causing a quiet moan to slip from Lia.
“Well if you weren't already saying that, then you'll definitely say it now” Lia smirks, lifting her shirt up over her head and slowly dragging her trousers down and revealing a new lacy black lingerie set that could easily kill you with how stunning she looks.
“Oh my god” You mutter.
“Now… How about we go back to how you were going to eat me alive?” Lia says suggestively, pushing you down on her bed.
“It’d be my pleasure baby” You smirk.
____
WE ARE SO BACK! Will be a return to posting a bit more frequently!
#woso x reader#lia walti x reader#lia wälti x reader#lia walti#lia wälti#lia walti imagine#woso one shot#woso imagine
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Safe Space
Synopsis: based off of a request I got (that I can no longer find) that wanted to see reader comforting Jessie, Jessie seeks comfort from her girlfriend after a hard couple days at the Olympic Games.
Warnings: discussion of the Canadian Olympic scandal, that’s it
WC: 1.6k
A/N: hi, I’m on vacation again, so here’s a sort little blurb (I have no idea when this is posting because my time zones are all messed up!) I also may or may not have reviewed this after being awake for like 24+ hours so no promises on the grammar and spelling.
You had quickly wrapped a towel around your body as you stepped out of the shower, hearing a second knock on your door you originally figured it was the hotel sending up the extra blanket you had requested before you hopped in the shower. However, when the knocking continued, becoming more insistent you turned and moved over to the door, double checking that you were covered before looking through the peephole and immediately pulling the door open.
“What are you doing here?!” You said, shocked to see Jessie standing in front of you. “You can’t be here.”
“I know but, can I come in?” Her voice was quiet, she only made eye contact with you in short glances. She shifted her weight, hands fiddling together.
“Jess…” as you say her name she looks up giving you the chance to fully take in her appearance. You notice her slightly disheveled appearance, a frown across her face, eyes watery, her lip had a slight shake to it as she awaits your answer. Your heart sinks at the obviously distraught appearance she had. “Yeah, come in.” You open the door to your own hotel room before quickly glancing into the hallway to see if anyone else was around.
“You’re not supposed to be here Jessie.” You tried to gently remind her as you follow her into your hotel room.
Jessie sighs. “I know, I just, I needed you. Even if it’s just for a few minutes.”
The Canadian team had spent the last couple of days playing their first games of the Olympics, all wins but outside of the game, everything was a mess for Canada. Everything was a mess for Jessie. Drone scandal, being labeled as cheaters, losing coaching and staff, constant pressure from the press to make statements, nothing about this tournament had been easy.
You knew the pressure your girlfriend was holstering. Not only was she captaining her first major tournament, she was captaining what felt like a sinking ship. She had been nearly silent since the news broke, calling you just to say a hello before falling into silence and letting you speak until other obligations caused you to hang up.
You saw her briefly after the first game, she had looked tired, as did every other player. You got the chance to talk with her, remind her how proud of her you were, how proud everyone was, but you knew she didn’t care to hear it.
By the end of the second game she looked not just tired, but drained. Only coming over to quickly see you following their victory she hardly spoke, muttering a greeting and letting you kiss her cheek and give her a quick hug before she retreated to the locker room, head down as if they had just been beaten.
The third game she hardly looked like herself. Dark circles had formed under her eyes that had slowly lost the sparkle you had become so used to seeing. She hardly smiled, only looking like she was having fun during a goal celebration before her face would return stoic. She hardly even spoke during the game, not to her teammates, not to the ref, not to the other team. She simply waved to you before leaving the field, not utter a word to you, her family, or any fans.
It was unlike Jessie, she wasn’t one to usually let a games or the sport in general ruin her mood for the day, a couple hours sure, but today and this week was different. To say you were worried about her was an understatement.
You worry for her had set in days ago, when the news first broke. You knew your girlfriend well and you knew how she’d likely cope with the situation. Jessie would do her best to take the weight off her teammates inadvertently putting it on her own back. She’d try to hold the team together as best she could, at the expense of herself. She’d stay up late to talk with the other girls, to make sure they felt reassured, not caring that she lost sleep over it. You knew she’d do anything for her teammates, even if it meant hurting herself.
You felt like you were watching your girlfriend break apart, unable to do anything.
When she showed up, unannounced at your hotel room, you knew things were bad. It was so different, she was actively going against the team's rules and guidelines sitting in your hotel room. Jessie wasn’t one to mess around with the rules. She followed them and encouraged her fellow teammates to follow them as well. Thus meaning she never left the team hotel to see you when she wasn’t allowed, she didn’t sneak off, especially not to come to your room, her being here meant she needed you.
“What’s going on?” You said looking over your shoulder at her as you rummage through your suitcase for some sweats. You give her a second to respond and when she doesn’t, you turn around as you drop the towel and pull a shirt over your head.
Jessie is laying on your hotel bed, one arm slung across her eyes, her other resting on her stomach. You watched as she took a few deep breaths, her chest rising and falling. Slipping on underwear and a pair of sweats, you quickly moved to hang up your towel before sitting on the edge of the bed.
Your hand comes to rest on Jessie’s thigh, giving her a comforting rub. “Jess, do you want to talk about what’s going on with you?”
“It’s, just all of it, it’s too much to get into, I can’t do it.” Her voice quivers slightly, to anyone else they might not have noticed, but you knew. “I know I can’t be here but, just a quick cuddle please?” She pulled her hand away from her face, and sat up. Seeing the mix of disappointment and sadness in her eyes made your heart ache. You never wanted to see her this upset over a game, especially one they didn’t even lose.
“Sure babe, but it’s gotta be quick, you can’t be getting in trouble for sneaking out.”
“I know, but I, I can’t be in that hotel anymore, I just can’t. They’re all looking to me, and I don’t have the answers!” Her words stop and you notice she’s suddenly breathing unevenly.
“Jessie, hey.” Trying to pull her attention, you quickly stand up from the bed to squat in front of her, putting your hands on her face. You can see her relax slightly into your touch. “Look at me, Jess, look at me.”
“You’re doing the best you can, that’s all anyone can expect of you. That’s all you can do.” You try to convince her of the words you were saying, letting your thumbs gently caress her cheeks.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No, I’m so tired of talking about it, I just need you.”
“Okay, come here.” You stand up, climbing onto the bed to lay down before lifting the covers out so Jessie can join you. She curls her body into your side, her head coming to rest on your chest and her arm draped across your chest, her hands resting just under your breast. “I love you.” You kiss the top of her head, feeling her hum in response.
You run your fingertips along her back, scratching lightly, aiding her in falling asleep. It’s not long before her breathing slows and you feel her completely relax against you.
You remained still in bed, the last thing you wanted to do was to stir and jostle the head that rested on your chest. The arm that was wrapped under her body had fallen asleep a long time ago but you couldn’t move her. You watched as your girlfriend’s phone rang, Janine’s face on the screen, you debate answering it for her before letting it go to voicemail.
Your own phone then begins to ring, this time you answer. “Hey Janine, what’s up?” You whisper, trying to keep your voice low.
“Hey, have you heard from Jess? I don’t mean to panic you but she’s not in our room, haven’t seen her in a bit.” You can pick up on the worry in your girlfriend’s best friend’s voice.
You look down to where your girlfriend’s head was resting on your chest, soundly asleep. For the first time in days she looked peaceful, she looked like she was okay.
You whisper back to Janine, not wanting to wake Jessie. “I don't want her to get in trouble, but I’ve got her, she’s fine.”
“She’s with you?” Janine asks, sounding confused.
“Yeah, I know she shouldn’t be, but she showed up and I think she just needed a break. She’s sleeping.” You continue to whisper, pausing when you notice Jessie stir slightly.
You hear Janine’s sigh of relief through the phone. “Okay, good, good. I don’t think she’s slept more than a few hours the past 5 days. I won’t say anything, everyone just wants her to be okay.”
“She’ll be back tonight, don’t worry.”
Janine thanks you before hanging up a second later. You feel the weight on your chest get lighter as Jessie lifts her head to look at you. “Was that for me?” She looked up at you with eyes still heavy with sleep.
“Janine just wanted to check on you.” You whisper, bringing your hand to her head with a gentle push in an attempt to get her to relax back against your chest.
“Am I in trouble?” You can hear the worry in her voice.
You give her another kiss to her forehead before running your hands through her hair and down her back to scratch her skin again. “No, not at all, go back to sleep Jess, I’ve got you.”
#jessie fleming#jflem#jessie fleming x reader#jessie fleming imagine#woso x reader#woso imagine#jessie fleming blurb#canwnt x reader#canwnt
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Wait cause I would love to see body party part 2 either there being sneaky behind closed doors when no one around or he wins a match and she’s has a surprise for him back in his hotel room
BODY PARTY PT2!:: rafe cameron
WARNING! :: professional!boxer!rafe, manager!reader, descriptions of; fighting, bleeding, and cleaning up injuries. (m&f!receiving )oral, fingering, choking,unprotected sex, slight strip tease, (munch!rafe)
SUMMARY!:: when Rafe gets offered a headliners match against the WBO champion, you decide to grace him with a surprise once your both back at his hotel room you managed to slip into it before bed.
A/N!:: wait I’m genuinely curious if I should make boxer!rafe into a mini series, like bringing him to meet your family for Christmas or something idk, but also, thank you for sending in this idea I love it and I’m sorry it took so long to answer!
You sort of had a reward system at this point. You and Rafe had been seeing each other for a few months now, he was now preparing for a fight that had been pretty hyped up in the press for a while now. They called it a dream match, two of the most talented brawlers within the lightweight division.
Rafe was on the rise for a past injury that set him back last year and now he’s back on the come up. He had taken his spot in the back of the line and had passed through opponent after opponent each fight, earning him his winning streak since his return. He buzzed with excitement taking on the baby face, the guy who was currently holding WBO title Rafe had held in the past and he was hungry for another run with it.
JJ Maybank was one of the hottest guys on the card, you had to consider yourself lucky to be in a main event with this guy. He was a sly dog, talked major shit, he could back it up with his hands, and that was another reason for Rafe to absolutely hate his guts, had it not been for the fact that JJ and Rafe grew up on the same little island of outer banks where they could never seem to mix well together.
You had talked to Rafe just before he was called to walk out to the ring, you find yourself sitting yet again front row this time you could see his family halfway down the row being blocked by Kelce and topper who sit nonchalantly next to your seat as the watch Rafe stand in his corner talking to his trainer and cut men as they retreat from the ring to the sidelines.
You don’t even spare a glance as JJ’s theme song hit for his walk out, the crowd having a mixed reaction, you keep your eyes glued to Rafe who almost like a magnet his eyes were pulled from the referee to you, a small smile finds his lips which earns one back from you. Mouthing the words ‘good luck’ and blowing an unnoticeable kiss to his which earns a grin from.
As the announcer talks about the premise of the match your eyes stick to Rafe’s figure, glistening under the bright lights almost giving your surroundings a sterile look as a small sheen of sweat prickles his skin. The stubble of his mustache growing in as well as the shaggy hair growing in after months with his buzz cut, you can’t help but eye him more as your eyes trail down his body.
The firmness of his chest, his sculpted abs that satisfied every itch in your brain perfectly, and the small happy trail that travels from his navel past his shorts that makes you bite your bottom lip thinking about what’s hidden past them. Sometimes you felt like a perv for how much space you have saved in the corner of your brain with thoughts of Rafe.
Taken out of your thoughts by the ring of the bell and the ref allowing the open space be used to go at it. The sight of the two men crowding the ring with their gloved fists up makes your stomach churn. Rafe had trained so hard for this fight alone, and you doubt he would go down at all. He had the height advantage, knowing he lost a bit of weight to match the blondes weight class for this fight.
The two don’t even bat an eye as they refuse to tap gloves and start slugging their fists at each other, the dull and short lived ‘thunk!’ That follows with every blow makes your body tense and cower. They both were hard hitters, and even if those gloves were there to at least cushion the hits the sheer power behind both of their hits were not made for the receiving end to feel any types of good.
And for some reason as you study the way JJ frolics about the ring casually with no fret and sweat beginning to make his hair stick to his skin he looked as if he was caught off guard with how much Rafe could easily want more after being untangled by the referee or even being pushed against the ropes, Rafe was never the type to back off in a fight, his libido and persistence was not as matched on JJ’s end; who subsequently enough was already succumbing to a swollen eye and bruises patching up on his face and body.
You had all high hopes for Rafe although you need he doesn’t need hope, he looked equally spent within the first round and only a minute left on the clock for their first go, he was breathing heavily with a touch of annoyance on his face, because even with a mouth guard in JJ Maybank has officially found a way to talk shit through the thick rows of rubber that slightly gives him an impediment.
They throw continuous stiff shots at each other, with a mixture of water and sweat flying off of them with each explosive blow to their bodies. You were a big ball of anxiety the second his trainer turns in his seat directly in front of you and mumbles “you think you could step in for me and talk to him. I know you got some advice for him- he takes it the best from you” his words come out slightly foggy due to the loudness of the crowd around you. “Yeah, he looks like he needs a couple of words” you respond quickly as he helps you over the barricade and onto the concrete floor your heels scrape gently making you cringe.
As the time runs out his trainer gives you a gentle pat on the back and gives you hand into your designated corner where Rafe meets you with half concerned eyes. “What’s the matter?” He readers your expression as you put down the small stool they gave to you for him to sit. “Nothings wrong, just came to talk; you gotta keep your head up, this kid likes to keep his low so it’s easier to lay those punches when all he does is retract from the high right hooks you throw” you cup his chin and pour water into his mouth and over his shoulders cooling his skin.
“He keeps trying to lock up with me” he rolled his eyes making you laugh as you guide him to breath slowly and deeply, the cut men rubbing Vaseline on the cuts and bruises forming. “If anything resort to body shots, if he’s backing you into corners head shots, you have the height advantage so it takes nothing for you to swing low” you advice pouring water past his pouty lips as he spits the water into the small bucket a cut man held out.
“Deep breaths, aim low, don’t let him wrap around you, alright?” You say sternly with only a few seconds on the time for their break before they’re ordered to clear ring, you give his chin a gentle squeeze “good luck” you mumbled once more before leaving the ring and using the empty spot next Rafe’s trainer Mike who looks at you with hopeful eyes. “So…?” He asks making you smile “He knows what to do, I think because Rafe is used to bigger guys he doesn’t really know where to focus” you watch intently as they change up the foot work; JJ coming out the corner looking less fresh faced and more sluggish with every step.
Rafe’s shoulders roll back as he takes on his stance with his gloves and head up, and an intense look in his eyes, his energy non-stagnant as they center and throw hooks and blows at each other, and it wasn’t until Rafe had backed JJ into a corner and throwing hooks and jabs straight to his ribs that makes you wince and actually lock into Rafe’s actions.
JJ had his guard up blocking his face with his gloves, and once Rafe knocks one of his hands guarding his face he dropped a mean right hook almost stunning you as your whole body tenses seeing how the young blonde wobbles a bit. Rafe pulls himself away and letting JJ find his footing in the center. You could tell by his body language that the punch square in the face had pissed him off, the both of them carrying fire in their eyes as they square up once more in the center.
Your eyes widen and could barely keep up in real time with the flurries of punches they were exchanging, in the moment it felt like whoever stopped throwing first was ought to be knocked out cold by the end of it, yet the crowd cheers on and they all sat on the edge of their seats in suspense. It was when the bell had rung for the second round to end and teams to flood the ring you watch Rafe retreat to his corner, his skin red with blood gathering at his upper lip you rush up the steps into the ring before anyone else with water and tissue in hand Rafe sits in the all to familiar stool.
“Jesus, you two are going at it harder than people during a Black Friday sale” you joke trying to lighten the mood, Rafe’s eyes don’t leave the opposite corner as his jaw ticks and tighten against his guards you cup his face making his eye look at you sharply before they soften looks up at you his eyes once a stormy blue almost instantly resorting back to their usual icy color. “Deep breaths, put your arms above your head” you whisper to him and he follows your instructions as the hands working with you continue their duties.
“You’re doing good, just keep doing what you do. He looks tired, it’s like he’s only running on adrenaline so keep pressing him; he’s trying to play the energy game and you’re already winning” you speak over the loud music as Rafe listened nodding his head taking in every word. “Do I look like I’m slowing down?” His voice beared genuine curiosity only getting a head shake “if anything you’re fighting like this shit just started. The move with knocking his glove down was smart, if you keep doing things like that I’m pretty sure you’ll win via knock out” you wince at the memory as you could see some of the sweat flying to the mat with how hard Rafe had punched his opponent.
“Okay” he whispered as you use the last few seconds of his break to give him more water and put in his mouth guard before exiting the ring. The match becoming more excruciating as it drags on as the both are exchanging blows and bleeding with busted noses and lips eventually Rafe throwing a nasty right hook to JJ’s jaw that makes him drop to the floor his body slumping against mat the referee immediately checking on the younger boy before calling it and proclaiming Rafe as the winner.
A rush of pride surges through your veins, entering the ring as Rafe pries off his gloves his focus immediately on you as you always down walk up to him with a shining smile that makes your cheeks sore, his lanky arms wrapping around you in a tight hug, as the heavy belt wrapped around his waist; shining and thick, it presses against your lower stomach “I’m so proud of you” your words are muffled as your face presses against his shoulder.
You both pull away keeping a professional mask on in these moments Rafe got to give his final statements on the fight before exiting back to his locker room letting him shower before you clean his cut lip and the small scratches on his face and body. Putting away the small first aid kit you hold his jaw gently “I have a surprise when we get back to your place” you whispered making a mischievous and all to familiar smile tug at his bruised pink lips “yeah?” He asked his fingers fiddle with the large golden ring that encapsulated his finger.
“You didn’t want a celebration party, but I say; me and you just need to have our own celebration” you smirk and rough lets out a husky laugh as he moves to change into more comfortable clothes and gather his belongings as the two of you plan to leave. “What kind of celebration?” His voice finding its usual flirty tone he has when it’s just the both of you “it wouldn’t be a surprised if I told you” you teased as he holds the lockeroom door open for the two of you to leave.
It had never been unusual for you and Rafe to leave events with each other, the public had grown familiar with the close ‘friendship’ between the two of you through interviews and social media since Rafe had begun his boxing career. Privately the two of you had changed the dinamic nature from being friends to an eerie limbo of being domestic and sexual partners with no real label yet.
Checking back in was a breeze as you had booked separate rooms to avoid suspicion; yet you know majority of your night was going to be spent in his room. The dim orange light fixing from the beautiful chandelier that filled the spacious room, the texture white walls detailed with gold paint around the edges, or the large drapes above the one singular window that was covered, and the wall behind the bed as neutral tones of creme and beige with dusty rose gold accent covers the room giving it an almost vintage vibe.
Rafe drops his bags at the foot of the bed frame with an exhausted sigh he takes off his navy blue bommer jacket that covered his polo shirt, you take the jacket out of his hands and set it on the arm chair in the far corner of the room, you grab his arm guiding him to the edge of the bed. “Why don’t you relax hm? I’ll be back in a second” you mumbled as you stand between his spread legs holding his face in your hands gently grazing your thumb over the bruise that was leaving a big purple splotch on his jaw.
“Are you coming back with my surprise?” He asks his eyes lighting up with excitement like a dog who can hear their owner entering the house. “Maybe” you shrug pecking his lips and turning away to the bathroom near the entrance to his room finding the silky robe in a navy blue with his last name on the back with a set of lingerie that hugs you in all the right ways and does every curve of your body justice under his sink where you knew he wouldn’t look.
The robe was actually Rafe’s, it was one of his favorite peaces of gear to match his shorts and gloves, you let the fabric swallow you, being more loose on you than him, you smile at yourself in the mirror as you tie it closed letting it compliment your waist. You give yourself the final touches before walking back out slowly Rafe’s eyes latch on to you with an unmatched ferocity that sends a shiver through your bones.
Walking closer to the dirty blonde haired man it seemed he finally realized what you were wearing as you slowly turn around to show off his last name on your back like a trophy you slip open the robe as you whispered “congratulations champ” as the silk pools around your feet revealing your skin and the warm air in the room shifts. “c’mere baby, let me see you close up” he groaned, his voice slightly slurred as the pain in his jaw twangs every time he speaks.
Holding out a hand to you which you take with no hesitation, putting on a show as you walk with a slight sway to your hips that makes him watch you close and calculated like he was on the hunt and your were his pray who so innocently was frolicking about. When you take up the same space between his legs Rafe’s hands drop from your hands to the back of your thighs groping at the fleshy skin “best surprise could’ve asked for” he mumbled as he presses himself against your lower tummy.
His nose grazing your skin making you tense only to relax at the feeling of his soft warm lips pressing underneath the wire of your bra, the room filled with a distant buzzing and heavy breathing. “Didn’t expect this huh?” You looked down at him as your hand races through his hair, your nails purposely scratching against his scalp making Rafe moan. His weakest point that you had discovered after 2 weeks of sex all over your shared apartment. “c’mon now you’re just teasing me” his voice almost twisted in a whine.
“Well how about you lay back and let me help you relax on your big night” you push his shoulder gently guiding him to rest against the mattress as his buff arms flex as they rest behind his head. You get on your knees as the dull ache is a second thought the moment you begin to unbuckle his belt and pull his boxers and pants down in one full swoop. He was already hard and eager in your grip, the sloppy sounds of your slick palm fisting over his cock.
A small wince leaves his lips and Rafe doesn’t know if he’s palpitating or if hearing his heartbeat in his ears was normal, but the thought loses his the second Flattening your tongue against the underside of his cock you dragged up against the vein running up to the tip— he let out a rich moan that ended with a groan "shit". His head was thrown back against the mattress and his breathing was labored.
His hand rests on the back of your head not moving as he watches you take him deeper and deeper, feeling the way his hips were grinding into your mouth makes you pull away as spit gathers messily at your chin as thin strings of saliva latch from his cock to your mouth making you giggle. “fuck” whispered as you swipe your thumb over his sensitive tip as you lick a long stripe from the base of his cock to his tip swirling your tongue around him before pushing yourself to take him in the back of your throat feeling an impeding gag as your eyes cloud with tears.
Rafe on the other hand felt like he was ascending to a parallel universe pure pleasure, as the slick sound that come from between his legs makes them shake as your hand wraps around his dick filling the space that your mouth couldn’t handle. “fuck you’re gonna make me cum quick” he groaned as his hand travels to cup your face he sits up watch the way you look utterly fucked out just by sucking him off.
His thumb presses against your plump bottom lip as he looks at the way your pretty lip combo smudge on not only your face but his cock, and it makes his head spin. “Wait baby, hold on” he huffs out, pleasure so apparent in his tone as you pulled off his cock you slightly pout looking up at him with smudged makeup and your hair messy, Rafe can’t help but instinctively smile “I want you to ride my face” he whispers as his chest rises and falls and baited breaths as he watches your face twist in confusion yet regardless you stand up stripping yourself of your panties and slowly straddle his lap, he lays back like once before comfortably as he reaches his hands out to guide you over his face.
Groaning at the sight of you glistening wet and ready for him “fuck s’so pretty” he slurs before he sensually licked from your entrance to your clit and sucked with fervor making you moan as your back arches and your hand pushes his face deeper between your thighs. The feeling of his tongue almost as if he had to lick every inch of your pussy his hands grab at your ass making you arch deeper making a raw moan cut through the heavy air “fuckkk Rafe” you squeal as your thighs tighten around him.
His hand travels between your thighs as he continues to lick sloppy stripes against your pussy lazily, you can already feel the trembling in your thighs as your fingers grip harder against his shaggy hair making him hum against you sending vibrations up your body “pull harder, baby” he groans lazily as if nothing could pull him away from latching his mouth onto you and making you finish on his tongue.
Once Rafe could feel the pressure and stinging sensation in his scalp he hums “that’s it, be a doll and cum for me” he groaned against you, your head tossed back as you feel the warm and tight sensation that was growing in your lower stomach, you don’t know how much more you could take but out of pure desperation for release you grind your hips against him.
He placed his hand on your ass, kneading the flesh harshly as the other finds your pussy; groaning into you before easing his finger past your entrance. the added stimulation had you mewling. The sounds you make are music to his ears. He presses his nose on your clit, inhaling your scent deeply before his tongue dives inside your waiting pussy. You pull onto his hair, writhing against his face.
The thickness of another added finger was making you dizzy It feels like you’re high, stomach tightening with each second “you’re gonna make me cum” you whine as if the feeling was pushing you to the edge you look between your shaking this to see Rafe absolutely lost in the taste of you; his eyes rolled back, and his face glistening with a flush to his cheeks and in that moment you melted away with the hot white feeling of your orgasm practically hitting you like a car.
Rafe licks up every trace of your orgasm until you wince and pull away with a whine you adjust yourself to sit on his lower stomach still sensitive yet satisfied. The man beneath you sitting up looking just as clouded with lust as you do, capturing his lips in yours with an unmatched intensity as you taste yourself on his lips.
The rough palm of his hands pulling you as close to him as possible like in any moment you’d disappear. Growing more and more desperate to feel you he pulls away from you with hesitation pressing his forehead to yours. “Lay on your stomach for me baby” he whispered and letting you move with calculated ease as you move to the headboard and grabbing a pillow you can lay down underneath you before arching your back and shiver slightly at the cold air that hits you between the thighs.
Arching your back gives Rafe the perfect sight of your ass. You could feel his palm caressing and needing your skin before giving it repeated harsh slaps that had you quivering. Nothing compared to the beautiful stinging feeling on your skin given by him.
"Want you inside me so bad" you mumbled as your fingers grip the sheets, you were so needy that you were dripping down your thighs and it didn't take much for Rafe to run his tongue over his lips and grab onto your hips pushing his tip against you and pushing into you slowly before bottoming out.
The sharp grip he had on your hips kept you grounded as he set a steady pace that had you panting and moaning. Hearing yourself made your face heat up, dropping your head into the sheets hoping to muffle the pleasure falling from your lips.
"Don't get all shy on me now" Rafe says as his hand pulls your hair into a makeshift ponytail, pulling your head away from the sheets "I wanna hear you. Don't hide from me" he says breathily as his thrusts become more sharp and the sound of him pounding into you was hard not to hear.
"I can't help it. It's too good" you slur your words as you begin to bounce and grind against him to meet his hips. It felt like he was in your stomach and you didn't mind at all, your hands clutching the sheets tighter as he used his other hand to wrap around your throat. As his grip around your throat tightens, you couldn't even gather your words as he hits a spot that has you breathing shakily and your moans are even more louder.
"Right here? Does it feel good here?" He asks as he drags his cock against that same spot again and again "yeah, it feels so fucking good Rafe" you moan as your eyes roll back. The feeling of his sweet lips on your skin as you feel like you're in heaven.
Your thighs are practically shaking at the feeling, pleasure practically taking over your body as Rafe pounds you into his mattress without a single care in the world. Pushing your face against sheets while he becomes sloppy and rougher with every passing second you could feel the pressure in the pit of your stomach growing and waiting to be released.
"I can't take it" you moan as you shake your head "I'm gonna cum" you whimper as you feel warm tears slide down your cheeks. "I think you can baby, you wanna cum so bad right? So take what I give you" he orders sweetly in a faux tone. His thrusts are non stop and you can't help but let the pleasure envelope you.
"Oh fuck" you gasp as the feeling of release comes closer "cum on my cock. I know you can '' he coos at you while pulling your hips into his harder than before tipping you over the edge as your walls clench around him sporadically earning a guttural moan ripping through Rafe's throat.
"I'm close, where do you want it?" He asks as he continues to fuck into you "inside. Please cum inside me Rafe" you beg before you feel the pressure in your stomach let loose "I got you, you're okay" he praised as his fingers rubbed down your spine leaving goosebumps up and down your body.
A few more thrusts slow and deep have your toes curling and sending Rafe into an orgasm struck daze. "Fuck you feel so good" he groans as his hands rub against the red warm skin of your ass. Leaning of you and kissing up your spine as you both bask in your pre orgasm clarity.
You both were practically glowing as Rafe waited until he softened inside you to pull out "you did so good" he whispers sweet nothings to you as he pulls out and watches his cum drip down your inner thighs.
The both of you settle into the bedsheets the body heat coming from the both of you feels comforting, Rafe doesn't want even the slightest bit of space between the both of you as he pulls you by your waist until your pressed flush against his chest.
“Congratulations champ” you huff out making Rafe snicker “thank you” his words are followed by an impending silence, although you do know eventually you would be walking back to your own bedroom with sore and shaking legs but that was something that you would have to worry about later.
As for now you would enjoy his warmth that radiates against your skin.
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