#I have a lot of feelings but I need a moment to breathe

[soaps-mohawk]

Cherry Red, Crimson Blood

Chapter 42: Comfort and Joy

Summary: Tis the season to be jolly...

Pairing: Poly 141 x reader

Word Count: 8, 417 words

Warnings: Alpha/beta/omega dynamics, omegaverse, alternate universe, slight angst at the beginning, blood and disturbing imagery, nightmares, PTSD, lots of comfort, holidays

A/N: Yes, CRCB is getting its holiday episode. Something holly and jolly before Christmas, some sweet comfort for the last chapter of this year. It's kind of rough but I don't hate it. I hope everyone feels the same. Happy Holidays to everyone

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It’s quiet in the house. 

There’s a stillness in the air that seeps into your very soul. The only light is from the street light outside. Your father never allowed you a nightlight despite your fear of the dark. You weren’t allowed to show such weakness in front of him. God forbid his family have any flaws. 

You’re the flawed one. 

It’s too quiet in the house, not even your brothers’ snoring audible in the tense quiet that has settled over your safe space. It has your breathing shallow so as to not disturb the heaviness in the air. Your sister is asleep in the bed across the room, tucked under the blankets safely. Sleep evades you however, something tickling in the back of your mind. 

Something is off. Something is wrong. 

“Hannah.” You whisper, disturbing the darkness in favor of not feeling so alone in the oppressive silence. “Hannah.” 

Yet your sister does not stir, showing no sign of even acknowledging a disturbance as she sleeps deeply. You bite your lip, sinking back further under your covers. You could wake one of your brothers, but the likelihood of one of them helping ease your fear is small. They’ll just usher you back to bed and tell you to grow up. You could attempt to rouse your mother, but that runs the risk of also waking your father. If nothing is wrong, it will be your doom. 

Maybe it’s all just in your head. Some terror brought on by a lingering nightmare. 

You need to get up. You can’t lay in the darkness anymore. 

So you rise from the safety of your blankets, padding silently across the wood and out into the hallway. There’s a nightlight allowed out here to prevent stumbling in the dead of night. There’s nothing in the hallway, no silent spectre waiting to grab whoever leaves their room first. You creep silently down the hallway towards the black gaping maw of the living room waiting just beyond the edges of the light. 

You stand there at the end of the hallway, gazing into the darkness for a moment. It’s not truly dark, light filtering in through the curtains from the streetlights outside. Yet the darkness feels thicker than it ever has before as you stand there, waiting for a shadow to move. 

Nothing moves, and after a breath you turn to the left, cutting through the dining room straight towards the kitchen. It’s darker in here, cut off from the street, yet you navigate it with ease. You’ve spent many nights navigating through the darkness, creeping around the house when you can’t sleep. 

You enter the kitchen, heading for the cupboard that holds the cups. Your mother used to give you warm milk when you couldn’t sleep. Sometimes you’d rise to find her awake, sitting in the living room. Sometimes she’d be crying. Sometimes she’d just be sitting with the lamp on, staring into the distance. 

It always made you wonder what she was thinking about. 

You stand on your toes, reaching up for a glass. It nearly falls and hits the counter but you manage to catch it, preventing what would no doubt be a crisis. You let out a breath before moving to the sink, filling the glass up. You stare out the small window that shows nothing but the fence between your house and the neighbors. All the houses are the same, built after the same model with the same green grass out front. It’s like a movie set, some suburban setting for a drama or a horror movie. 

The oppressive darkness feels like a horror movie. 

You turn to head back to your room, but you’re stopped by a figure standing in the entrance to the kitchen. You can just make it out, large and looming in the darkness. For a moment you think it’s your father, awakened by something, some instinct telling him there’s something moving around in the house. It’s not the right size to be your father, though, too tall and long. 

You stumble back towards the light switch, your fingers shaking as you flip it on. 

“Phil?” You ask quietly, staring at your father’s best friend in shock. You haven’t seen him in almost two years. 

His mouth opens in a haunting grin, blood pouring down his chin. You stare in horror as blood soaks into his white shirt, dripping onto the floor below. The cup slips from your hand, shattering on the floor as his hand wraps around the knife stuck in the side of his neck, pulling it free. Blood sprays across the white cupboards, painting them like some gruesome work of art. 

“Look...what you did...to me...” Phil says, his voice nothing more than a gurgling wheeze. 

He reaches out a blood soaked hand towards you, sending you stumbling back. Glass cuts into the bottoms of your feet, sending shards of white hot pain up your legs. You don’t care, too busy trying to evade the bloody hand trying to grab at you. You slip in the water on the floor, falling backwards, the back of your head seconds from hitting the side of the counter...

“Easy, easy.” 

Arms are around you, holding you tightly as you sob. Your feet are burning as you sit there on the kitchen floor. It’s not the kitchen in your old home, though, it’s the kitchen in the cottage. Your feet are burning with sharp stabs of pain. There’s water soaking into your pajama pants. 

“You’re alright.” 

The light is on, raining down bright yellow light from overhead. You hate it, the oppressive light burning your eyes. You squeeze them closed, trying to ease the pounding in your head that pulses in time with your heart. 

“...sleepwalking I think...” 

Voices float in and out as you sit there, leaning back against something solid and warm. There’s arms around you, holding you tightly, your own arms trapped up against your chest. You tilt your head back, resting it back against the solid warmth. 

“Almost hit her head...” 

“Move her to the couch...”

“It’s not that uncommon during times of extreme stress.” 

You wince as another tiny piece of glass is pulled from your foot. 

“Even if someone has never experienced sleepwalking before, it can start at any age.” 

“Is this something we need to worry about now?” 

“It’s hard to say.” Dr. Keller dabs at your foot with a damp towel streaked with pink from your blood. “It’s one of those things we’ll just have to wait and see if it was a one-time thing or if it will become a regular occurance.” She dabs at your feet with the towel before shining the flashlight on them again. “You want to talk about the nightmare?” 

She’s talking to you now. 

“No.” You say, the word strained and weak from your lips. Your face feels tight from the tears you had shed in your confusion and delirium. The nightmare is still fresh on your mind, replaying like some sick television show, over and over in your head. 

She gives you a look, but doesn’t press anymore. She won’t ask again, not in front of your pack at least. 

She lets your feet rest on the coffee table before moving closer to you. Her hands cup the back of your head, pressing down on certain spots. “Does your head hurt?” 

“No.” You say, ignoring the throbbing behind your eyes. 

“Well, thanks to Kyle’s quick reflexes, I think we’ve avoided a concussion.” She says, turning to Kyle. “How’s your hand?” 

“Fine.” He says from where he’s sitting next to you, flexing his fingers. “I’ll take aches and pains if it prevents a hospital visit.” 

“That’s the last thing we need right now.” John says. 

You can’t help but wince at his words. 

If he notices, he doesn’t say anything. 

“Thankfully there wasn’t any serious damage.” Dr. Keller says, wrapping your feet in gauze. “Just try to take it easy for a couple of days. Walking isn’t going to feel very good for a while.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“Not really.” 

“I think it might be good to talk about it.” 

“You’re as bad as Dr. Keller.” 

“Well, she and I agree that holding everything in isn’t going to help anything.” Kyle says, taking the seat next to you. “We just want to help you.” 

“Unless you can crawl into my mind and fix my memories, I don’t think you can help with this.” You say bitterly. 

“Well, I can’t do that, but I can listen.” He gives you a look. 

You choose to ignore it. 

He continues to stare at you as you turn your gaze out the window. It’s raining again, light droplets hitting the window. You can feel yourself beginning to crack as he continues to stare at you, his gaze not sharp and prying, but instead soft and inviting. He really wants to know, not out of curiosity or need, but because he cares. He wants to help, even if it’s just listening. 

Can you be brave enough to share? 

“I woke up in bed, but not in the cottage. I was in bed at the house we lived in before I was sent to the institution.” You swallow the lump in your throat threatening to choke you and cut off your words. “It was the house we moved to shortly after Phil left. I remember feeling something was off after I woke up, something was wrong but I couldn’t figure it out.” Your mouth suddenly feels dry. “I went to the kitchen to get some water and Phil appeared there in the darkness. He...” 

You trail off for a moment, the memory of what he had looked like in your dream sending a spike of fear through you. You had thought the one positive of Phil being dead was that he couldn’t haunt your dreams anymore. He’s not out there hunting you, seeking you out. He’s dead, burned to a crisp in that barn. You made sure of that. 

“He had a knife in his neck. He was bleeding.” Your voice shakes as tears prick behind your eyes. You hate it that you’re still crying over Phil and his hold on you even in death. “He said....he said ‘look what you did to me,’ and pulled the knife out. I dropped the glass of water and slipped in it. I was falling but then I woke up.” 

Kyle is silent after you finish, the quiet settling heavy between you, as heavy as it had felt in your dream. You know you sleep walked through part of your dream. You went to the kitchen for water and dropped the glass. You slipped in the puddle and nearly hit your head on the counter if Kyle hadn’t found you seconds before and cushioned your fall with his hand. Your feet still sting from stepping in the glass, even though the puncture wounds and cuts have mostly healed. 

A warm hand touches yours, fingers curling around yours. Kyle’s rough skin, calloused by handling weapons and fighting for so many years, drags against yours as he slowly lifts your hand away from the arm of the chair and up towards his face. His breath is warm as it hits your palm, his soft lips pressing against your skin. You turn to face him, tears still blurring your vision as you sit there, staring at him. 

“It was just a dream.” He murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to your palm. “No one is going to hurt you. Phil is gone and we’ll be damn sure nothing else can even try.” He presses your hand against his cheek, your fingers trembling against the smooth skin. “You have nothing to fear.” 

“Only what’s in my head.” You whisper. 

“What can we do? How can we help you defeat those demons plaguing you?” He asks, threading his fingers through yours. 

You stare at him for a while, taking in his face again. It feels like so long since you’ve really looked at them, since you’ve truly taken in their features. You’ve almost forgotten what they actually look like, your mind always conjuring up muddy images of their faces in your memories. 

You’ve forgotten just how pretty and perfect he really is. 

How...disarming his face is. 

“I don’t know.” You whisper, your thumb stroking his cheek. “I don’t know.” 

The breeze is cold, whipping around you and biting at your cheeks. The blanket tucked tightly around you stops the wind from chilling you to your bones. You don’t care about the cold, your gaze out on the waves crashing against the shore. 

“Cold?” Johnny asks, tightening his hold around you. 

“No.” You say, fighting back a shiver as you lean further back against his chest. The last thing you want right now is to leave the beach. 

“Somethin’ tells me I shouldnae believe you.” He says, squeezing his body around yours. 

“Well, whatever it is, it’s wrong.” You say stubbornly, shoving your hands in your armpits to keep them warm. 

“Stubborn little thing.” He says, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. “Should be headin’ back soon anyway.” 

You let out a whine in protest, leaning your head back against his shoulder. “I want to stay here forever.” 

“I know.” He says, letting you go just enough to pull his phone out of his pocket. “Wish I could let ye.” 

You can’t stop the shiver that shakes through you at the loss of his warmth. It is cold and getting colder as the sky gets more grey overhead. The sun is going down, the darkness of the evening rolling in earlier and earlier every day. 

“Time to head back.” Johnny says, pocketing his phone. 

“Five more minutes.” You whine, trying to lay all of your weight against him. 

“I have direct orders to get you back stat.” He says, pushing himself up to stand. 

You let yourself flop back on the blanket you’ve been sitting on, looking up at him as you lay there in the sand. The wind is picking up, blowing some of it onto your face. You sputter, pulling yourself back up to sit. 

“Come on, kitten.” Johnny says, tucking his hands under your arms before lifting you to stand. “Let’s head back before it gets dark.” 

He brushes the sand off of your blanket before picking up the other one and shaking it. He drapes it over his arm before guiding you back up the path towards the car. You take one last look over your shoulder at the water before following him to the parking lot. 

It’s dusk when you get back to the cottage, the lights from inside glowing warmly through the windows. Johnny takes your hand, leading you up the steps and into the cottage. 

It’s warm inside, the rest of your pack moving around in the kitchen and dining area. You kick your boots off, passing your blanket off to Johnny before heading into the living area. The table is all made up, many dishes sitting out ready to be served, all of them looking very familiar.

“What is this?” You ask, stepping closer to the table. 

“It’s Thanksgiving.” Dr. Keller says, stepping out of the kitchen with a tray of meat in her hands. “I thought you might like to celebrate.” 

“Oh.” You stand there for a moment. You didn’t even realize what day it was. Time has been so strange with no phone or television to give you an idea of what day it is. It’s been moving quickly, almost four weeks since the day you were taken. “Is that why you let Johnny take me to the beach?” 

“We wanted to surprise you.” John says. “I know you don’t like surprises, but this felt like a more appropriate one.” 

“I don’t like surprises, but this is really sweet.” You move towards your normal seat at the table, looking at all of the dishes laid out. 

“We made all the classics, or at least as close as we could get with what we have available.” Dr. Keller says. 

“It’s pretty close, but then again I’ve only had Thanksgiving once.” Ashley says, coming out of the kitchen. You hadn’t even noticed her car parked outside. 

“Thank you for this.” You say, still a bit taken aback by the gesture. “I didn’t even know it was close to Thanksgiving. Time...time seems so weird now.” 

“A lot has happened in a short amount of time.” Dr. Keller says, rubbing your back. “That can skew how we perceive time passing.” 

“I also don’t have any way to tell time.” You shrug. 

Dr. Keller gives you a soft smile. “Well, we’ll see if we can rectify that.” 

Everyone takes their seats at the table in their usual spots, except for the extra chair next to Dr. Keller for Ashley. You recognize the strategic move, even if the rest of your pack pretends not to notice. Dr. Keller also pays it no mind, but you can’t help but notice the bashful look that flashes across her face when her hand brushes Ashleys as food gets passed around the table. 

You load up your plate, digging in almost immediately. You hadn’t realized how hungry you got down at the beach, not until you came back to a cacophony of delicious smells. It all tastes good, all of it throwing you back into reminders of your childhood and Thanksgivings with your family. While your father still had expectations of proper behavior from you and your siblings, it was tradition that he’d spend most of the day in his chair. Your mother did all of the cooking, you and your siblings helping when she’d allow. 

You never truly understood how much work she put into every holiday until you were older. 

Thanksgivings at the institute were never the same as Thanksgivings at home. You got the day off of course, and there always was a better meal that day with the classics, but it always felt so manufactured, not unlike the food on base. You never realized how much you missed home cooking until now. 

You never realized how much you missed your mothers food until now. 

Tears blur your eyes as you continue to eat, trying to distract yourself with heaping spoonfuls of food. 

“You doing alright?” 

Of course the one time John would notice your melancholic state would be right now. The entire table pauses, turning to look at you. You start to curl in on yourself, not wanting all the attention all at once on you. 

“Yeah.” You clear your throat, wiping the tear that betrays you and falls down your cheek. “Just tastes really good. Reminds me of my mom’s cooking.” 

The words slip out before you can stop them, tumbling out onto the table and landing among the mashed potatoes. Things suddenly feel very vulnerable, very raw. You wish you could grab the words, shove them back in and make them all forget your admission. You don’t want the soft stares, the sympathetic looks in their eyes, the understanding. You want to crawl under the table and hide until the moment passes. 

“I-I think I just missed home-cooked food.” You try to save the moment from growing more embarrassing for you. 

“I second that.” Johnny says, the tension in the room lightening just a bit. “Easy tae forget what good food tastes like sometimes.” 

“I’ll give it to the Americans.” Kyle says, recognizing your desire for the attention to be off of you at this moment. “They do know how to do a good feast.” 

“We can do more than good food.” Dr. Keller says, sounding almost offended. 

“Like Halloween.” Johnny says. “What I wouldnae give to have an American Halloween.” 

“You just want an excuse to eat candy until you’re sick.” Simon rumbles. 

“I wan’ tae do more than that.” Johnny gives him a look. “Costumes, the parties, trick or treatin’. All of it.” 

“Maybe we’ll have to take you to America next Halloween.” Dr. Keller says. “Let you get a proper taste of the holiday.” 

Next Halloween. 

You’re not even thinking a week ahead, much less a year. You’re not even sure the others have thought much about what the next few months will look like. Where will you all be in a year? You can’t stay at the cottage forever, as much as you would enjoy it. At some point a decision has to be made. Where do the five of you go from here? 

The conversation begins to lighten, the attention thankfully being drawn off of you again. That doesn’t save you from John’s gaze, though, his eyes flicking up to you every so often. You try not to meet that gaze, keeping your eyes down on your plate as you eat until you’re stuffed full. Yet you can’t help but look up when his gaze lingers too long, when your omega shifts under the scrutinizing gaze of an alpha. He’s trying to read you like he used to be able to. You wish you could hide better from him, but you’ll never be able to truly keep your thoughts and feelings under wraps. 

Not from him. 

You’re banned from the kitchen as food is cleaned up and placed in the fridge and dishes are washed. Instead you find yourself on the couch, staring into the flickering flames of the fire. Kyle takes a seat next to you, sitting down with a quiet groan. 

“How are you?” He asks, draping his arm on the back of the couch behind you. 

“Fine.” You say, still turned to face the fire. “Full.” 

He lets out a quiet chuckle. “Same. Don’t think I’ve been this full in a long time.” 

“That’s the point of the holiday.” You say. “Eat until you pass out.” That’s what your father used to do, slipping into a food coma after dinner in his chair. As much as you hate him, you do miss those quiet evenings where you could loosen up and not care about his calculating gaze. 

“Feeling tired?” He asks, and you can feel his questioning gaze hitting the side of your head. 

“No,” You respond, and it’s the truth. There’s far too much going on in your head to even nap right now. 

It falls silent for a few moments, only the sounds from the kitchen and the crackling of the fire breaking the silence. You’re far away in your thoughts, replaying the last few weeks over and over in your head. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” John asks, breaking you from your reverie. He takes a seat on the other couch, facing you. 

“Just thinking about how much time has passed.” You answer, tucking your knees up close to your chest. “It’s been almost a year and yet it feels like it’s only been a few weeks.” 

John hums. “You would have been with the CIA already by this time.” 

You nod. “Yeah. I was picked up just after Halloween. Didn’t really have Christmas last year. The CIA wasn’t exactly the most festive place. They had bigger things to worry about.” 

“Did you miss it, Christmas?” He asks. 

“Well, yeah. Of course, even if we didn’t really celebrate much in the institute either. We didn’t have any gifts to give each other outside of things we were supplied with by the institute. They didn’t really bother decorating either. We got the day off, of course, and we had a nicer meal than usual, but it wasn’t really some big festive celebration.” You shrug. “It was always a big deal in my house. It was my mom’s favorite holiday.” 

You cut yourself off before the emotions can get to be too heavy. You’ve already almost lost it once in front of them today. The last thing you want is to risk that again. You’ve spilled too many words already. The last thing you want is to spill more. 

John’s gaze leaves you to look at Kyle next to you, the two of them sharing a silent conversation. You’ve always envied their abilities to speak to each other without words. You wish you could know them that well, you wish you could understand them on that level. You wish you shared the bonds they have with each other. You’ll always be the odd man out, the outsider. You’ll never have that closeness, that ease with which they exist around each other. 

You’re beginning to see it again, the fluidity between them, moving around each other without needing to look, always aware of the others. Here you are again, on the outside of that once more. Things really have gone back to the way they were before, back when things were new and foreign and unknown. You’re an unknown factor in this dynamic again, all of them tiptoeing around you like you might explode if they get too close, if they push those boundaries again. 

Part of you hates it. Part of you likes it. 

You’re not sure what to feel anymore. 

You tilt your head back, thumping it against Kyle’s hand. “Sorry.” You quickly sit yourself back up. “Done that twice now I guess.” 

“No need to apologize.” He says, his hand dropping to your shoulder to lean you back again. His hand gently cups the back of your head, rubbing soothing circles into your scalp with his fingers. 

You let out a content hum, your eyes fluttering closed. It falls silent between the three of you as Kyle slowly works you into a comfortable, content state. Your omega begins to almost purr contently, and for the first time in a while, she doesn’t feel quite so out of control. 

The days start to make more sense as you now have an idea where you are on the calendar. It’s the end of November, meaning in just a few weeks it’ll be Christmas. The guys haven’t said anything about celebrating, so you haven’t gotten your hopes up. Still, you can’t hide that itch in the back of your mind, that desire to have a proper celebration for your first year out of the institute. 

“You know you can tell them what you want.” Dr. Keller says, sitting in the chair next to you. “We’ve gone over this. I’m sure those guys would turn the world upside down if you asked them to.” 

“I just...I don’t know how.” You say. “What if they have no plans for Christmas? What if they weren’t planning anything? What if this is too last minute?” 

“There’s a little under a month till Christmas. It’s hardly last minute.” Dr. Keller says. “Even if they say no, then we’ll have a celebration. Just the two of us.” 

“You’d do that for me?” You ask, turning to look at her. 

“Of course. If you want to celebrate Christmas, then we will, no matter what the others decide.” She says firmly. “If they don’t wish to participate, then they don’t have to.” 

“That’s...really kind of you.” You say. She’s done so much for you already, and here she is offering to do more. 

“It’s what I’m here for.” She says. “Whatever you want to do. Decorate, bake cookies, go shopping. All of the above.” She reaches over, squeezing your hand. “You’re in charge.”

You’re in charge. 

Your omega nearly preens at the words, starting to get excited. Yet, you’re not quite sure how you feel about that kind of pressure being placed on you. It’s not in your nature to be in charge...or at least that’s what the institute taught you. Omegas are submissive and follow their alpha’s orders. 

The institute was wrong about a lot of things, though. Maybe you do want to be in charge. Maybe if you’re in charge, things will start to get better. Maybe if you’re in charge, you can finally get your pack in line and get them doing what you want them to do. 

It’s far too early for you to be awake. It’s still dark out, no light filtering through the gaps in the curtains. There’s light coming through the gaps in the door, though, and you can hear quiet rustling. 

“It’s still crooked.” You hear Kyle’s voice through the wall. 

“I’m doin’ the best I can.” Johnny retorts. 

More rustling and quiet tinkling sounds through the wall. There’s no more hope for sleep for you now, your interest far too piqued as to what they’re doing. You slide out of bed, rubbing your eyes as you pad across the cold floor to the door. 

You’re not ready for what you find on the other side. 

All four of them pause as your door opens and you take half a step out the doorway. You freeze, hand still over one of your eyes. Johnny is standing on a stepstool, leaning over a tree. Kyle is standing next to him, peeking around him to look at you. Simon is frozen in front of the fireplace, garland hanging from his hands. John is standing between the couches, a round ornament in each hand. 

You slowly lower your hand from your eye, sweeping your gaze over the four of them once more. “What are you doing?” You ask, even though you already know the answer to that question. 

“Decorating.” The four of them say all at once. 

“We were going to surprise you when you got up.” Kyle says. 

“We were trying to be quiet.” John says. “But those two muppets can’t get the star properly on the tree.” 

“You’ve got it on the branch wrong.” Kyle says. 

“It won’t go any other way.” Johnny argues. 

They go back to what they were doing, almost as if you’re not there. You’re glad for it as tears begin to fill your eyes. They’re decorating. They were decorating to surprise you. You can’t help but wonder if Dr. Keller expressed your desire for a proper Christmas to them on your behalf, but part of you knows she wouldn’t do that. She’s pushing you too hard to take control to do that. 

Maybe they’re doing it because they want to. Maybe this was their plan all along. 

“Let me do it.” Kyle says, tugging on Johnny’s shirt. 

“I can do it just fine.” Johnny persists, still fiddling with the star on the tree. 

You roll your eyes, moving over to them. “Move. I’ll do it.” 

Neither of them argue as Johnny steps down off the stool, letting you climb up. You can feel their hands hovering as you stand up on your toes, reaching for the top of the tree. You bend the top branch, situating the star on properly for them. 

“See! I told you.” Kyle says, his hands still hovering as you climb down off the stool. 

“My way would have worked just fine.” Johnny pouts. 

“I’m sure it would have.” You shrug, patting his arm before walking away. 

You join John in sorting through ornaments as Kyle and Johnny finish adjusting the lights on the tree. They’re all brand new, sealed in the boxes still. So they went shopping for all of this. You don’t suppose a summer house would have Christmas decorations laying around. It’s touching that they did this for you, even if they didn’t know you’d want it. 

“Thank you.” You say, fiddling with the hook on one of the ornaments. “For doing this.” 

“It wouldn’t be fair to not give you a proper Christmas.” John says. “Not when it means so much to you.” 

A small smile tugs at your lips, tears starting to fill your eyes again. “I appreciate it. More than you know.” 

You don’t flinch as he reaches out, gently running a hand over your head as you wipe the tear that falls. It’s nice, feeling his touch again. You hadn’t realized how much you missed it. You wrap your fingers around his wrist, holding his hand against the side of your head. You barely realize you’re doing it as you press your nose into his wrist, breathing in his fresh, woodsy scent. Petrichor, damp earth. It fills your nose like it did the first time you scented him, making your head spin. 

For the first time in a while, your omega lays comfortably in the back of your mind, settled contently back into her cage. 

You stand there nervously, staring at your alpha. He hasn’t acknowledged you yet, giving you a moment to gather yourself. You’re nervous, your palms sweaty, even if you have nothing to be nervous about. The worst he can say is no, and then you’ll have an excuse. Or he’ll say he’ll do it himself, then one surprise will be ruined at least. 

“Yes, sweetheart?” 

Sweetheart. It’s been a long time since you’ve heard that nickname spoken in such a way. Your omega rolls over and shows her belly, ready to submit to his quiet purr of your nickname. 

“I...I wanted to ask you something.” You say, shifting nervously on your feet. Now is the time. Now is when you have to be brave and voice your wants. 

“Go ahead.” He says, putting his phone down and turning to face you.

You almost wish he wouldn’t. You wish he’d stay turned away, attention on his phone so he can half pay attention to what you’re saying. No, instead he has to give you his full attention and put even more pressure on you. 

The words catch on your tongue, choking you as you attempt to be brave, as you attempt to take this leap into unknown territory. 

The worst he can say is no. 

“I want to go Christmas shopping.” The words come out fast, almost slurring together in your haste to voice them before you lose all the courage that led you to this point. 

He leans back in his seat and you prepare for the worst, you prepare for the no waiting to come out and put an end to your silly little request. You’ll sulk and cry about it in the safety of your room. Now you have to be strong. 

“Okay.” He says. 

You nearly turn and run in shame before the meaning of the word settles into your brain. You stand there in surprise, staring at him with wide eyes. 

“Okay?” You parrot, your brain still trying to comprehend what it is he’s saying. 

“Okay.” He repeats. “You’ll have to take one of us with you, though. You can’t leave unprotected, even with Christine.” 

“I’ll go.” 

The voice makes you jump, spinning on your heel to face Simon. You hadn’t even heard him approach. You stare in surprise at the other alpha. He hasn’t made much of an effort to insert himself back into your life. You were half sure he hated you again with how he’s been acting. 

“Alright.” John says, his voice almost as surprised as you feel. 

It will be nice having the hulking alpha following you around. You think back to when you went lingerie shopping with Johnny. How long ago that seems now. People had gone out of their way not to walk too close to you and your protector. No one will want to mess with you with him around.

“Go with Christine.” John says, making you turn back around to look at him in surprise. 

“Really?” You ask in disbelief. 

He nods. “I think it will be good for you, getting out of the house. Just don’t stay out too long.” He turns back to his phone and you turn back to look at Simon, but he’s gone. 

“This might be a tad bit overwhelming at first.” Dr. Keller says as she drives through town. “It’s been a while since you’ve been in a populated place.” 

“I’ll be fine.” You say, even if you don’t really believe it. You had prepared for this possibility in the days you’ve thought about this trip. 

John wanted you to go early on a weekday, when it was less likely to be too crowded. While crowded might hide you better, it also left too many possibilities for someone to sneak up on you. 

“You say the word and we’ll go.” Dr. Keller says. “I can always come back later and finish shopping for you.” 

“Okay.” You say, still staring out the window at the buildings. It’s been a while since you’ve seen so many buildings all in one spot. 

Simon is quiet in the passenger seat, also watching out the window. You wonder what’s going through his head, if he regrets volunteering to come along. You wonder why he did volunteer in the first place. You know safety is of the highest concern now while Shepherd is still out there. Does he not trust anyone else to protect you? That’s a possibility. 

There’s another rift in the bonds. 

Dr. Keller pulls into the Tesco parking lot, many cars there even for so early in the morning. Everyone else had the same idea as John. 

“Try to make this as quick as possible.” Simon says as you undo your seatbelt. “The sooner we can get in and out, the better.” 

Dr. Keller gives him a look, something passing between the two of them before she opens her car door. You get out as well, pulling your jacket tighter around you as the cold air hits your skin. It had been warm in the car, the heat cranked for your sake. 

You’re half tempted to hold Simon’s hand as you cross the parking lot. You doubt he’d let you. He might pull away and that would be worse. That would ruin the whole trip. Old habits, you think. He’s barely spoken to you, so much as made an effort to rekindle the relationship between you. That would be pushing things too far. 

Instead you stick close to Dr. Keller, trying not to panic as you walk into the building with the bright lights and the people. It’s gross, making you squint for a moment as Simon grabs a cart, your eyes taking a moment to adjust. 

“What are you planning on getting?” Dr. Keller asks, trying to distract you. 

“I-I don’t know.” You stay, blinking at aisle after aisle of products. “I didn’t think this far ahead. I thought John would say no.” 

“Well, what do you think they’d like?” She asks. 

What would they like? What do they like? You’re drawing a blank as you think about them. How little you know about them too. 

Kyle. Kyle likes skincare. He’s always prioritized that on base. Maybe you’ll get him something related to that. 

You start for the cosmetics section, Simon following like a shadow behind you and Dr. Keller. What kind of skincare does Kyle like? You know he uses coconut oil after he showers. He always smells good. Maybe something exfoliating? Something moisturizing? Both? 

You stand in front of the skincare, drawing a blank as you look at the many options. Dr. Keller and Simon stand there quietly as you deliberate, suddenly overwhelmed by the choice you have to make. 

“Who are you shopping for right now?” Dr. Keller asks, obviously picking up on your discomfort. 

“Kyle.” You say. “I know he likes skincare.” 

“Hmm.” Dr. Keller hums, looking at the options as well. “How about something like this?” She picks up a gift set with cleanser and moisturizer. “Something to cover all the basics?” 

You nod. “Okay. That sounds good.” 

Simon says nothing, offering no words of advice as she puts it in the cart. Maybe he doesn’t even know his own pack that well. Or maybe this is his way of showing his displeasure for you. Let you flounder and get the wrong thing. You want to believe he wouldn’t be that cruel. 

You wander the aisles, looking for gifts for the other three. You pass by a spa kit, pausing for a moment. You should get one for Dr. Keller. She deserves some pampering and relaxation after weeks of taking care of you. 

You put two in the cart, grabbing one for Ashley as well. 

Johnny. What does Johnny like? Art. He likes art. Maybe something with art supplies. 

You head for that section, Simon still following behind silently, aside from the clinking of the cart as he pushes it. 

You pause as you pass by a display of teddy bears. Johnny sleeps with a stuffed bear. You know that. You’ve cuddled with it yourself. It’s probably back on base with the rest of your belongings. He must miss it. 

You grab one, putting it in the cart. 

“For Johnny.” You say as Dr. Keller gives you a look. 

Simon still doesn’t say anything, but his scent reaches your nose as you walk past him. 

The alphas. John and Simon. The two you seem to know the least. What do they like? What would they want as gifts? Simon likes knives and masks, but you’re not sure you could just buy a knife in the UK like you could in America. You could just ask him, considering he’s here with you, but that feels almost intrusive. He’ll know what you get him regardless, but asking him seems like a daunting task. 

You continue wandering the aisles, looking for something that John might want. 

You pass by a gift set of tea, pausing as you stare at it. He likes tea. He might like some other options than what’s at the house. 

You put it in the cart. 

Now Simon. The hardest of the four. 

You continue wandering the aisles before you pause in the books section. Simon likes to read. You do know that. You’ve scoured the shelf at the cottage enough to know what’s there and what’s not. Maybe you’ll get Simon some new books. Something that’s not available to you currently. 

You pick out a couple before putting them in the cart. 

“Okay.” You say, staring at the selection you’ve grabbed. “I think I’m done.” 

“You’re sure?” Dr. Keller asks. 

You nod. “Yeah. I don’t want to do anything too over the top.” 

You really don’t. The last thing you want is to do too much too soon. 

You pause as you walk past the candy aisle, grabbing a handful of candy canes and putting them in the cart before heading for the checkout. 

Dr. Keller pays with cash as you load the bags into the cart. You’re ready to be out of the store with its bright lights and loud music and people. It’s starting to get busier, more and more people coming in the doors there to do their Christmas shopping as well. 

Simon loads the bags into the trunk as you climb into the car with Dr. Keller. 

“How do you feel?” She asks as you let out a breath. 

“A bit overwhelmed.” You say honestly. 

“It’s a lot going from isolation to a supermarket. I think you did good, though.” She praises you. 

The door opens as Simon climbs into the passenger seat. He’s barely said a word the entire trip, looming in silence like he used to. Part of it makes your chest hurt, that he would regress so much after what happened, but part of you understands. He had to make a big decision on your behalf, push himself past his comfort zone to save your life. Of course he’d want some distance after everything. You wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want anything to do with you again. 

It’s far too early when light seeps into your room before disappearing. You keep your eyes closed, willing whoever had just entered your room to vanish before they reach the bed. 

You’re not so lucky, a hand settling on your shoulder and gently shaking you. 

“Time to rise and shine.” A soft voice says. 

You let out an irritated grumble, trying to pull the blanket up over your head. 

“It’s Christmas morning, don’t you want to go open your presents?” That hand shakes you again. 

“Sleep.” You murmur, curling up in a ball under the comforter. 

“It’s already 10 am.” The voice says again, tugging the blankets down. “They let you sleep longer than they wanted.” 

Last night was a rough one. You had laid awake far too late, staring at the ceiling and then you woke from a nightmare in the middle of the night, and it had taken time to calm yourself and fall back asleep. You’re still exhausted, your eyes burning from tiredness. 

You let out a grunt of displeasure, but you know there’s no getting out of this one. You’re going to be getting up no matter what. 

You slowly stretch out your limbs, rubbing your eyes. “Fine.” You yawn, turning over to press your face into the pillow. “Be up soon.” 

“No going back to sleep.” The hand rubs your back gently. “Then I’ll have to send one of them in and they won’t be quite so nice about it.” 

You hum into the pillow, already feeling sleep tugging at your brain. Despite the warning, your mind sinks back into the comforting realm of rest as your body relaxes back into the bed. 

You’re not sure how long you get to rest before the comforter is torn off of you, landing somewhere on the floor. Hands roll you over and sit you up before your brain can even process. You blink the rapidly fading sleep from your eyes as you’re hauled up, flying through the air for a moment before you’re tossed over a broad shoulder. 

“Time tae get up.” Johnny says, packing you towards the light filtering in through the open door. 

You let out a whine as he packs you out into the warmth and the light before lowering you back down on your feet. Hands stop you from falling backwards, Johnny’s t-shirt clad chest coming into view as you blink the blurriness from your vision. 

“Happy Christmas kitten.” He says, grinning brightly at you. 

You mutter something that sounds like ‘Merry Christmas’ back to him. His hands slowly spin you around, turning you to face the tree. 

You blink in surprise as you stare at the many presents on the floor under the tree. You weren’t expecting that much, though you suppose with six people in the house there would be quite a bit. It’s one gift though that draws your attention. It’s seated on the far side of the tree, nothing but a bow on top of its head. 

“You...you got me a giant bear?” You ask in surprise. 

“Was Si’s idea-oof.” Johnny coughs as Simon hits him on the back. 

You walk over to it, pulling the bow off of its head. You’ve missed your giant bear and the comfort it brought you. That’s the one thing you wish you still had from the barracks, that you’ve been wanting for for weeks. It’s bigger than the one at the barracks, the top of its head reaching your chest when you’re standing in front of it. 

You let your hands run over the soft fur, squeezing its plush face. There’s no cameras in this one. You know they’ve checked, ensured its safety. There’s no one looking back at you as you stare into its dark eyes. 

“What do you think?” Kyle asks. 

“I love it.” You say, trying to stop the waver in your voice. The last thing you want is to cry on Christmas. “Thank you.” 

“Come on.” Hands guide you to the chair, letting you sit down. “You’ve got a lot to open.” 

The next hour is a flurry of wrapping paper and bows as presents get passed around. You open up new shoes and clothes, a set of lacy panties courtesy of Johnny, new books, strawberry scented soap and shampoo, and some other comfort items. 

You’ll never forget Johnny’s face when he opens your gift to him, his eyes lighting up as he stares at the soft bear you picked out. It gets you a big hug and a kiss to the cheek from him, and you know he’s going to be sleeping with it tonight. 

You’re exhausted by the time the last present is opened, rubbing your eyes again. You hadn’t even changed out of your pajamas, feeling underdressed compared to the others. Yet at the same time it makes you feel like a kid again, tearing into presents on Christmas morning, excited to see what you got. 

You look around the room, John and Kyle starting to bag up wrapping paper and clean, Johnny on the couch next to Simon holding his bear, Simon sitting near the fire already cracking open one of the books, and Dr. Keller and Ashley on the other couch talking, sitting very close. It brings a small smile to your face. You’re happy for them. It’s nice to see Dr. Keller getting something positive out of this stay at the cottage. 

You can’t help but think that whatever happens next, maybe it might not be so bad after all. 

“Think we should wake her up?” Kyle asks. 

“No.” John says, standing next to him. “It’s the most relaxed I’ve seen her in weeks.” 

They both stare at you where you lay near the tree, draped over your large bear. You’re sound asleep, mouth slightly parted as you snooze away. 

“I think she likes it.” 

“It was a good choice.” John agrees. “It will certainly help make her more comfortable.” 

“I can’t wait to see how she’s going to fit that on the bed.” Kyle says with a soft smile. 

“Well, you certainly won’t be joining her when she does.” John smirks. 

“I think I can live with that.” Kyle says. “Like you said, whatever makes her more comfortable.” 

“I’m glad she’s loosening up a bit.” John says, turning away from you to head back towards the dining table. 

“So am I. She deserves to feel safe and comfortable.” 

“She does. We need to make sure she feels that way all the time, no matter what.” 

“I want to help her.” Kyle says longingly. 

“I know. And we can, but we have to let her lead.” John says. “The best we can do is listen to her and give her what she needs, even if it's not what we think is best. We don’t really know what’s best for her in the end. Only she does.” He reaches up, cupping Kyle’s cheek. “We need to focus on each other too.” 

“I know.” Kyle says, leaning into his touch. “I want to.” 

John’s lips twitch in a small smile. “Good. Because so do I.” 

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[ivyues]

Reconciling Comfort: pt.2 of Stray Kids' reactions to their S/O refusing a hug

Part 1 -> Rejected Embraces and Heavy Hearts

Bang Chan

The apartment feels oddly still as you stare at your phone, debating how to text him. You’d assumed Chris had gone to the studio like he planned, leaving the tense air of the argument behind to clear his head. You hate how things were left, hate the way his face crumpled as he turned away.

Finally, you decide to get up. While typing out a message you walk to your living room but out of the corner of your eye you see a silhouette sitting on the couch. Your heart jumps as you glance up.

Your boyfriend is sitting there, headphones on, his laptop balanced on his knees. His brow is furrowed in concentration, his fingers tapping away at the keyboard.

The sight startles you. “Chris?” you blurt out, breaking the silence.

He looks up sharply, pulling his headphones off with one swift motion. “Oh—hey,” he says, his voice soft, almost hesitant. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

You blink, still processing his presence. “I thought you went to the studio. Why are you still here?”

He rubs the back of his neck, glancing away sheepishly. “I didn’t want to go in case… you wanted to talk to me.” His words come out rushed, like he’s second-guessing every syllable. “But if you don’t – if you want me to leave, I understand. I’ll go right now—.”

He immediatly closed his laptop, as if to pack up, but you stopped him with a quick shake of your hand. “Nonono, I’m glad you stayed,” you said, moving to sit beside him.

“I’m sorry,” you say softly, your voice heavy with sincerity. “I’m sorry for hurting you. I know physical affection is important to you, and stepping back like that… I didn’t mean to shut you out like that. I just—” You pause, struggling to find the words. “I wasn’t ready at the moment, but it doesn’t mean I didn’t care.”

His expression softens, a mix of relief and lingering vulnerability. “Thank you,” he says quietly. “That means a lot to me. But… you don’t have to feel obligated, okay? I don’t want you to do anything you’re not ready for, even if it’s just a hug. I’m not upset about that, I promise.”

Chris hesitates before continuing, his voice low. “And… I’m sorry too. For the argument. I think I let my emotions get the better of me. I wasn’t trying to put all that pressure on you. I just – sometimes I’m not the best at explaining what I mean.”

Instead of answering, you lean into him, wrapping your arms around him. It’s warm, grounding, and the tension that had built up between you dissolves. Chris lets out a breath he seems to have been holding and hugs you back, his arms encircling you tightly.

Lee Know

An hour passes, the weight of the day easing slightly as you reflect on Lee Know’s words and his quiet presence. You finally gather the courage to seek him out, hoping to mend the small gap left by your earlier rejection. The sound of gentle clatter of utensils lead you to the kitchen.

There he is, focused on the task at hand, the light from the stove casting a warm glow over his side profile. He’s stirring something in a pot, his movements precise yet relaxed.

When he senses your presence, he glances up. His eyes meet yours, and for a moment, no words are said. The hurt you feared would linger is replaced by a soft understanding, though his brow lifts in slight surprise.

“Hey,” you say quietly, stepping closer. “I’m sorry for earlier. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just… I needed a bit of time to digest my day.”

His expression softens, his lips curving into a small, reassuring smile. But before he can respond, your stomach betrays you with a loud grumble.

He blinks in surprise before breaking into a chuckle, the sound warm and genuine. “Well, I guess you’re not just digesting your day – you’re starving too,” he teases, setting down the spoon. “Have you even eaten?”

You shake your head sheepishly, and he lets out a mock sigh of exasperation. “Unbelievable. No wonder you’re feeling down. What am I going to do with you?”

Before you can reply, he grabs a couple of plates and starts dishing out the food he’s prepared. You watch him, the way he moves with care, the way he’s still here, doing this for you, and it makes your chest ache in the best way.

“Thank you,” you say, the words carrying a weight that goes beyond the meal. “I really don’t know what I did to deserve this – to deserve you.”

He pauses, turning to meet your gaze again, his eyes filled with something tender yet teasing. “Oh, don’t get all sappy on me now. Just eat.”

You hesitate, biting your lip. “Actually… before we eat, can I ask you something?”

He tilts his head. “What’s that?”

You step closer, your voice soft. “Are you still up for that hug?”

His lips twitch into a grin, though he narrows his eyes in feigned disapproval. “Now you want one? After I offered earlier? You know my hugs are exclusive, right?”

You roll your eyes, but before you can defend yourself, he’s already pulling you into his arms, wrapping you in warmth and familiarity. The scent of his cologne mixes with the faint aroma of the food, and for the first time that day, you feel like you can truly breathe.

“I missed out earlier,” you whispers, your voice gentle but playful.

Changbin

Hours later, after giving you the space you seemed to need, Changbin cautiously approaches your room. The quiet hum of the house feels heavier than usual. He pushes open the door gently, only to find you sprawled out on the bed, passed out.

Changbin’s expression softens as he steps closer. The tension on your face is still visible even in sleep, and it tugs at his heart. He sits on the edge of the bed, careful not to disturb you, and studies your features for a moment. A sigh escapes his lips.

After a while, you stir awake to the dim light form outside. Blinking blearily, you notice Changbin sitting in a nearby chair, scrolling absentmindedly on his phone. He looks up as he senses your movement, offering you a gentle smile.

“You’re awake,” he says softly, setting his phone aside. “Feeling any better?”

“A bit.” You sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes. The weight of the day still lingers, but his presence is grounding. “I’m… I’m so sorry, Binnie,” you say suddenly, your voice cracking. “I didn’t mean to shut you out earlier. You had a tough day too, and instead of being there for you, I made it worse.”

His brow furrows with concern as he shifts to sit beside you. “Hey, no—”

“No, please let me finish,” you interrupt, tears welling up in your eyes. “I just… I’ve been so burned out lately, and I know that’s no reason but I took it out on you. That’s not fair. You deserve so much better than that.”

Your voice falters as you break into quiet sobs, the stress of the day finally overwhelming you. Without hesitation, Changbin pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly as if to shield you from your own thoughts.

“Shhh,” he whispers soothingly, resting his chin on your head. “It’s okay, baby. You don’t have to carry all of this alone.” His hand strokes your back in slow, comforting circles. “I know you’ve been going through a lot. I just want to help you, not make things harder.”

You cling to him, his warmth melting away some of the heaviness in your chest. “I’m sorry,” you repeat, muffled against his shoulder.

“Don’t apologize,” he murmurs, pulling back just enough to cup your face in his hands. His thumbs gently wipe away your tears. “I love you, even on the days when it’s hard to show it. And I’ll always be here, okay? We’ll figure it out together.”

Hyunjin

Later that evening, the cool night air brushes against your skin as you sit on the balcony, your gaze lost in the vast sky above, dotted with countless stars. The events of the day weigh heavily on your heart, but the stillness of the night gives you a moment of solitude, a chance to reflect.

The sound of footsteps breaks the silence, and you don’t need to turn around to know who it is. Hyunjin’s presence is unmistakable and you feel the space between you stretch even farther. He stands by the door, as though testing the waters, not wanting to disturb the fragile silence that exists between you two.

“I’ve been thinking,” he finally says, his voice soft and measured. “I don’t want to make you feel like you have to forgive me right away. But I need you to know I’m here, no matter how long it takes.”

You glance at him then, his words tugging at something inside you. The sincerity in his eyes doesn’t erase the hurt, but it reminds you of the person standing before you. Slowly, you lift up the blanket that’s shielding you from the chill of the evening. You shift slightly, creating a space beside you, a silent invitation for him to join you.

Hyunjin hesitates for just a moment before he slides closer, wrapping himself in the blanket with you. The quiet is comfortable now, not as heavy as it once was.

Minutes pass, neither of you speaking, but the tension between you seems to lessen. Eventually, you find yourself leaning closer to him, your head resting on his shoulder as the stars above seem to sparkle brighter in the stillness of the night.

You’re not ready to forgive him – not yet. But as the night stretches on, you realize that the hurt isn’t as sharp as it once was. It hurts more to be apart. Right now, this moment, sitting together in silence, feels like the only step you can take.

Han

Han was pacing quietly in the living room, trying to distract himself from the worry that had been growing in his chest since your refusal to be held. His eyes flickered to where you’d been earlier, feeling like a puppy abandoned by its owner. He couldn't help but wonder what you were thinking, what you were going through.

Then, suddenly, a sharp sound sliced through the quiet. His heart leapt in his chest, and before he could think, he rushed toward the kitchen.

When he burst into the room, his breath caught in his throat. There you were, crouched on the floor amidst the sharp shards of a broken glass. Your expression was a mix of shock and something darker, like the weight of everything inside you had finally spilled over.

"Omg, are you okay?!" Han asked urgently, his voice trembling slightly. His eyes wide, quickly scanned you for any sign of injury, but it wasn’t just the glass that had him panicked – it was the look in your eyes, distant and vacant, like you weren’t fully present.

You shook your head, looking down at the shards scattered around you. "I... I'm fine," you murmured, but the words didn’t sound convincing to him.

Your breath caught, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. "I'm such a mess," you said quietly, a shaky exhale following. "I don’t even know why... I just... everything feels so broken right now, and I don’t know how to fix it."

Han’s heart ached for you, and he didn’t hesitate. With a gentle, almost tender tone, he spoke. "It’s okay to be a mess," His eyes never leaving you, he crouched next to you. "You don’t have to have everything together. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere."

You let out a long breath, the tension in your body easing just slightly as you allowed yourself to lean against him. Neither of you spoke for a while, the stillness of the moment offering a rare kind of comfort. You could feel the warmth of his body against yours, a quiet support, like he was holding you together.

Eventually, Han reached out with his free hand, carefully pushing the glass shards to the side, making a little space between you and the mess. "We don’t have to clean it up right now," he said softly, his voice gentle. "We can just be here."

For a moment, you just sat there, on your cold kitchen floor surrounded by the shards of one of your favorite glasses, your head resting against his shoulder, letting the quiet soothe the chaos inside your mind. The world outside could wait.

Felix

Felix sat in the airport terminal, his phone clutched tightly in his hands. The din of travelers blurred into white noise around him, but all he could focus on was the blank screen he fiddled in his hands. He had checked it at least ten times in the past minute, hoping for a message from you – a lifeline to soothe the ache that had been growing since your last conversation.

The past few days had been tense, the effortless flow of your texts reduced to short, clipped exchanges.

"Still nothing?" Chan’s voice broke through Felix’s thoughts as the older member settled into the seat beside him.

Felix shook his head, a small, resigned sigh escaping him. "I don’t blame them," he murmured, his gaze fixed on the screen. "I just... I hate leaving like this, you know? I don’t want them to think I don’t care."

Chan placed a reassuring hand on Felix’s shoulder. "They know you care. Sometimes, people just need time to process." 

Felix nodded, though the unease remained. He knew Chan was right, but the uncertainty gnawed at him. What if time wasn’t enough?

A soft buzz interrupted his thoughts. His heart leapt as he saw your name flash on the screen. Hesitating for only a second, he opened the message.

"Hey. I hope you have a safe flight. Let me know when you get to the hotel? If you want, we could call."

Felix read the text twice, his chest tightening with a mix of relief and longing. It wasn’t everything, but it was enough. Enough to feel like a small bridge had been built between the two of you.

Chan caught a glimpse of the soft smile spreading across Felix’s face and leaned back in his chair, giving a small nod of approval. He didn’t say anything, but the respect he felt for the bond between you two was evident in the quiet way he patted Felix’s back before standing up.

The flight was long, but the thought of hearing your voice made it bearable. When he finally arrived at the hotel and dropped his bags, he dialed your number without hesitation.

-----

The days passed slowly, but eventually, Felix was home. His heart raced as he opened the door. The familiar scent of the place hit him first, grounding him, but it wasn’t until he heard your footsteps that everything felt real.

You appeared at the edge of the hallway, your expression a mix of hesitation and warmth. Felix froze for a moment, his breath catching as he tried to read your face. Then you smiled – small and shy.

Closing the distance between you, he wrapped his arms around you tightly, burying his face in your shoulder.

“I missed you so much,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion.

You held him just as tightly, your fingers threading through his hair. “I missed you too, Lix.”

It wasn’t just a hug; it was a reconnection, a renewal. It felt like the first time all over again – the warmth, the electricity. And in that moment, Felix knew you would both be okay. Even with the heavy talk standing in front of you, he believed that you'd both find your way through it.

Seungmin

The following day, you wake up to the soft light filtering through the blinds, your heart still weighed down from the emotions of yesterday. You go about your day until you find a small, neatly folded note on the kitchen counter, its edges creased from being gently set down. You recognize Seungmin's handwriting immediately.

The words are simple, but their meaning strikes deep:

“I know yesterday was hard. I’m here when you’re ready. Take your time.”

You feel a wave of warmth and gratitude surge through you, but also a familiar pang of guilt. His kindness, his patience – it almost feels too much, yet it's exactly what you need right now. You let out a breath, the tension you didn’t even realize you were holding releasing just a little.

Later, when you meet with Seungmin after his practice, your heart feels lighter but still raw. His usual bright, confident demeanor is softened by something deeper today. You catch his eyes and notice the faint hint of uncertainty behind his smile. He’s waiting for you, allowing you the space you need, just as the note said.

As you both settle into the familiar quiet, the words you’ve been holding back finally spill out, soft but genuine.

"Thank you for giving me space," you say, the gratitude in your voice clear. "I needed it, but I don’t want you to think I don’t appreciate you."

Seungmin’s expression softens, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "I just want to make sure you're okay," he replies, his tone sincere. "And if you need me to be closer or farther away, I’m fine with either. You don’t have to do anything until you’re ready."

After a moment of silence you ask “So… how would you feel about being a little closer right now?" Your words trailing off as you look at him, hesitant but hopeful. Your eyes search his, a hint of longing behind the question.

Seungmin's smile widens, though his expression remains gentle, and he shakes his head slowly, his eyes warm with understanding. "I think we’re already close enough," he says, his tone teasing but kind.

Without another word, he opens his arms, and you step into his embrace. The hug is quiet, comforting, and without the pressure of anything more.

I.N

You collapse onto the couch, your phone in hand, feeling a growing sense of isolation. The time passes, and you find yourself scrolling mindlessly through social media, trying to distract yourself from the emotional weight pressing on your chest. Each swipe seems to only deepen the discomfort, the posts making you feel even more alone as the world around you continues on without a care.

Your phone buzzes suddenly, and you glance down at the notification. It’s from I.N. The message is a simple meme – a picture of a dog wearing glasses with the caption: "Me when I try to act cool, but I’m actually an emotional mess."

A small chuckle escapes you, your heart lightened just a little by his attempt to cheer you up. It’s just a silly meme, but somehow, his gesture makes everything feel a bit more manageable.

The phone buzzes again, and you read his next message: "If you ever need to vent, I'm here. You don’t have to carry it all alone."

Your fingers hover over the screen for a moment, and you begin typing. "I’m sorry for earlier… I just don’t want to drag you down."

Almost instantly, a reply comes: "You could never drag me down. Let me know if you want a hug. I’m always here for you, okay?" Attached to that message was a GIF of two cartoon animals with big, fluffy arms stretching out in an exaggerated hug.

Your heart softens, the words hitting a place deep inside you that you didn’t realize was aching.

Without a second thought, you push yourself off the couch, phone still in hand, and head towards him. When he sees you standing there, his face brightens, and he opens his arms, welcoming you into a warm embrace.

“I’m sorry I pulled away earlier,” you whisper against his chest, the weight of everything from the day slowly melting away as you allow yourself to lean into his comfort.

[judeswhore]

santa baby

summary: you have an extra special gift for jude this christmas

pairing: jude bellingham x fem!reader

word count: 1.4k

warnings: 18+, hints of brothers bsf!jude, grinding, mentions of sex

notes: i Need him!!! you can find my masterlist here. i might make a second part to this

"can i open my eyes yet?" jude asked. he was seated at the very edge of your mattress, legs spread wide and arms behind him as he rested back on his palms, the perfect picture of calm. the barely noticeable tick in his jaw was the only giveaway that he was on edge and it sent a thrill through you knowing just how much you affected him. it boosted your confidence, made this little show feel a lot more exciting despite the slightly nervous tremor in your fingers.

for a few quiet moments you simply admired the man in front of you, basked in the opportunity to drink him in without his eyes on you. he was shirtless, per your request and the sight of his bare chest and that teasing ladder of hair made you a little dry mouthed, filled your head with endless fantasies. dragging your gaze upwards you settled on his face, on the stubble covering his jaw, the soft curve of his lips and his lashes, so unfairly long, they made you jealous. he was stupidly pretty, gorgeous in a way that had landed you in trouble the second your brother had brought him home. jude was supposed to be off limits. yet here he was, half naked in your room and growing slightly impatient with your surprise.

"babe?"

"hmm?" you hummed softly, still caught up in running your eyes over his arms, cheeks growing hot at the bulge of his biceps. you wanted to sink your teeth into them, into his shoulders and chest, to mark and claim him despite all the reasons you shouldn't. jude's huff of laughter brought your attention back to his face.

"can i open my eyes?"

"oh." you coughed quietly to clear your throat and straightened up, prepared to spin as you double checked your outfit was perfect. "yeah, you can open your eyes." you held your breath and watched his lashes flutter open, watched almost in slow motion as his jaw dropped, dark gaze bouncing rapidly over your body. he didn’t seem to know where he wanted to look most, a soft curse falling from his lips as he suddenly sat up straight.

you gave him a slow twirl, felt the tiny skirt you were wearing lift up just slightly and you were rewarded with a low groan from jude at the peak of your ass beneath. the outfit was simple enough, a tiny red skirt, equally as tiny red bra and a santa hat but the boy in front of you was staring as though you were a prized painting. it made your pulse thunder and your skin felt hot and prickly wherever his eyes roamed. goosebumps had risen across your chest because jude’s gaze was suddenly pinned to your boobs.

“merry christmas, jude.”

“holy shit.” he gave a light, breathless laugh, swallowed harshly and twisted his finger in the air. “fuck, gimme another spin.” you did as you were told, twirled for him and then stopped with your hands on your hips. a smile tugged your lips.

“what do you think?”

“what do i- jesus christ.”

“yeah?” you raised your eyebrows at his obvious lack of words, at the dazed look he was wearing and the desire burning in his eyes. jude bit down on his bottom lip, head shaking as he tracked every inch of your body and the heat of his gaze felt like the caress of his fingers over your bare skin. up along your legs, lingering just slightly on your thighs before sliding over your bare stomach, drinking in the way your boobs half spilled from the slightly too small cups and then over your face and to the little hat sitting lopsidedly on your head. he was grinning by that point.

“you’re gorgeous. it’s- i don’t- how do you look so fuckin’ good?” he groaned low in his throat, sounding almost like he was in pain. “that skirt.” a half shy smile was making its way onto your face as you fiddled with the hem of the skirt, hyper aware of the bulge that had appeared in jude’s shorts and even more aware of the way his hand had wandered only inches from it.

“i have something else for you.”

“something else?” jude gaped a little, shifted on your mattress to adjust his shorts but it did nothing to hide his cock. you swallowed, swiped your tongue along your bottom lip before slowly making your way over to him, hips swaying as you tried your hardest not to look ridiculous. the way this boy was looking at you however suggested that wasn’t a possibility. you came to a stop in front of him, tits so close to his face that jude simply couldn’t help himself as he leant forward, nipped softly at the flesh spilling out over the material before soothing the mark with a kiss. he glanced up at you through his lashes, eyes so dark they almost had you gasping for air. “what more could you possibly have?”

with your hands on his shoulders, you pressed your knees into the mattress on either side of his thighs, settled yourself in his lap only inches from his aching cock. you could feel the heat of him and wanted nothing more than to sink down onto him but you wanted jude to see the last part of your little gift. unable to stop yourself from teasing, you lowered your hips, ground down a little so you could drag your pussy over the tent in his shorts and grinned at the low hiss he let out. his hands clamped down on your waist.

“lift the skirt up.” your voice was a low command, silky smooth and you felt him shudder beneath you, watched his eyes fall closed for a moment when you lifted yourself back off his lap and simply hovered.

jude’s hands settled on your thighs and his fingers were soft as they slid up until they rested at the hem of your skirt. he fiddled with it for a second before flipping the material up, revealing your silky red underwear and his jaw ticked when he spotted just what it was you wanted to show him. stitched across the front of your underwear in pretty white thread, was one simple word, jude.

“thought you’d like it.” you whispered, heart thudding in your chest at his silence, heat flooding your cheeks because jude simply couldn’t look away. his throat bobbed on a swallow, lashes fluttering as he blinked once, twice before finally dragging his gaze back up to yours.

“you’re not real.” he didn’t give you chance to reply to that as he tipped his head to kiss you, lips slotting messily over yours as he curled one hand around the back of your neck to pull you closer. his other hand flattened against the top of your thigh, your skirt falling over his fingers as you settled back down into his lap.

for the next few minutes you simply got lost in his kisses, in the slow drag of his tongue over yours and the occasional nip of his teeth against your bottom lip. nothing mattered but jude’s mouth and the feel of his cock beneath you as you rocked slowly against him, unaware of the damp spot that was slowly spreading over the crotch of your new underwear. a startled whine bled past your lips when jude’s hand shifted beneath your skirt and his thumb pressed firmly over your clit. he rubbed it in soft, slow circles that matched the lazy press of his lips.

“want you to keep these on.” he mumbled, words muffled as he started to work his lips and teeth along your jaw. his hand had knocked your hat slightly askew and when he pulled back he helped to fix it for you, grinning dark and dirty at you when you eyed him in confusion.

“hm?” you were a little dazed, rocking into his hand and down onto his cock, fingers sunk deep into his shoulders for purchase. you choked on a quiet moan when his fingers slipped down and pressed against your already soaked hole, pushed against the damp material of the underwear he was now so infatuated with.

“y’gonna ride my cock like a good girl,” he told you, fingers deftly hooking into the material and tugging it to the side. two fingers brushed over your pussy, circled your clit before sliding back down. “but i want you to keep this pretty little outfit on, okay?”

[you-know-honey]

Hanging in Your Hands

Viktor x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 4k

←←←1/2

Viktor finds in you a love that subtly transforms him: without realizing it, he begins to take better care of himself, rest better and relieve his pain, all thanks to the peace you bring him. Finding a way to show you what he could never do with words.

N/A: English is not my native language, feel free to correct me in the comments and I will update it. Remember to share and comment if you liked it. Endnotes.

“Home sweet home…” you hum as Viktor opens the door, letting you in first like a true gentleman. You’re the first to leave your coat on the coat rack and throw your shoes somewhere in the room, walking now much more comfortably towards the kitchen.

Viktor’s home isn’t very big, but it had changed a lot since the first time you went there. Before, everything looked like a scene from the most godforsaken place, with almost no furniture and white morgue lighting. It was hard to convince him that to improve his health he also need to improve his environment. The living room was the largest room, with a functional fireplace, a second-hand coffee table and a sofa so soft it could be a piece stolen from heaven. The kitchen was the smallest, there was no table or chairs, instead there was a breakfast bar and some swivel chairs that you had taken from the academy and that Viktor had fixed. The bathroom started the hallway, followed by his office and finally his room. You had made sure that every room reflected something positive, watering plants or doing crafts like a comfort fairy. Viktor appreciated it, he had told you so many times, he didn't mind that you filled his house with your not so practical decorations, they were your personal brand and he liked it, besides spending all that time decorating, painting and remodeling gave him more reasons to love you, to get to know you perfectly and be fascinated by what he found in your being. Without you he wouldn't have managed to make his house feel and look like a real home in which to rest.

Viktor removes his jacket with precise movements. His long, deft fingers slide the dark fabric over his shoulders, revealing the impeccable shirt that sits tight against his slim figure. He folds the jacket carefully, as if he's in no hurry, and lays it over the back of the sofa. His hands move up to the knot of his tie. His fingers, always so precise, pull at the knot with ease, undoing the pressure around his neck. The gesture, so mundane to him, has a strange effect on you, an electric current running through your body. As if that weren't enough, the top button of his shirt unbuttons under his touch, revealing just a flash of skin on his pale neck. His breathing seems to relax instantly, as if the small adjustment brings him some comfort.

Viktor exhales softly, running a hand through his messy hair, unaware that this distracted gesture, combined with the shadow of exhaustion on his face, makes him look almost unattainable, like a work of art that doesn’t realize its own beauty. You feel trapped in a magnetic web that he doesn’t even know he possesses.

“That was sexy,” you mutter to yourself as you rummage through some food in the fridge.

“Excuse me?” His low voice echoes behind you, you have no idea how he moved so fast, his tone is incredulous, and his eyebrows arch slightly.

You shrug, trying to look casual as you turn to look at him, even though you know your face is probably burning. “What I said. You’re sexy. Especially when you do that without realizing it.”

His brain shuts down for a moment, processing the bold comment. “Don’t joke with me…” he finally says, leaning his cane against the fridge and trapping you in a bear hug, your hands quickly returning his, feeling the medical corset under his shirt.

“I’m not joking,” you insist, your words crashing against his bare torso, causing him to shiver slightly, which only makes his arms draw you closer to his body. “Is it so hard to believe?” you can hear his heartbeat quicken.

“Stop it…” he replies with his lips on your head.

“Too shy to receive compliments?” in his defense you are being a little more daring than usual.

His arms pull you closer to his body as if that were possible, it is clear that he wants you to stop talking, he laughs when he feels you squirm in his arms as if you are complaining.

“Y/N…” he tells you with that tone that you know is a warning, although it is not serious, you know he is having fun.

You sigh and he loosens his hug a little, enough so that you can rest your chin on his chest.

“Shall we make dinner together?” you ask, Viktor leaned in slightly, his eyes half-lidded in a warm gesture, and brushed the tip of his nose against Y/N’s in a gentle movement, barely a whisper of contact. It was an intimate exchange, full of affection and closeness, that spoke louder than any words. It was as if they shared a secret, a moment just for them, full of warmth and sweetness.

“Sure.”

Making dinner together is a very big word for what really happens in that kitchen, you prepare everything and force him to sit behind the breakfast bar to prove that everything is on point once you start the dinner. Viktor is not afraid to admit that he does not know how to cook anything other than toast and sandwiches. The kitchen is his war zone and the oven is the enemy he has yet to overcome, luckily he has you and by the time the timer in the shape of a pigeon reaches zero his stomach growls with eagerness.

“Taran!” you proudly take the lasagna out of the oven, the warm aroma fills the whole house and both of your stomachs growl desperate for food. “How is it?” you look at him expectantly.

Viktor runs his face over the steaming mold, it looks good and smells good “It’s perfect…” although he could perfectly refer to you instead of the lasagna.

“Go to the sofa, I’ll bring the dishes in a second.” still with your gloves on you push yourself over the breakfast bar to give him a chaste kiss on the lips. Cooking always puts you in a good mood, but seeing that he likes what you cook is a reward on another level.

As you serve the plates and accompany it with something to drink, you watch Viktor’s silhouette walk towards the sofa, he limps a little but that gives him a certain charm because he no longer does it in pain, the way he sits, the way he sighs as he leans his back against the back of the sofa, the way he tilts his head to look at the fire. Everything about him seems like a work of art to you, from the veins that run through his pale, thin hands, his moles that you’re sure must be a constellation in the sky, his eyes that remind you of fresh honey in a virgin forest, his laugh, secret but beautiful like the whistling of rivers in the distance. You love him like you have no idea. Thinking about him revives your spirit, releases unbridled currents of adrenaline that die for him, to reach him, to be in his arms and stay there forever.

“Enjoy” he says when he leaves the dinner on the coffee table, letting you fall on the sofa. Using a blanket to cover you both from the cold.

“Enjoy” he answers, using his arm to pull your figure closer to him and rests his head on yours.

You both eat in silence, not because you have nothing to talk about, just that your stomachs really need that lasagna, you are focused on Viktor’s plate, but this time it doesn’t seem like your tactics are needed to get him to finish eating, he really razes the plate with emotion, something that makes you feel proud. With a full stomach it’s easier to think of something to talk about.

“How about a plant?” You ask, resting your head on his chest, there’s something about his heartbeat that works better to relax you than the ocean sound records on the record players next to the window.

“A plant? Where?” he asks with a playful tone “There are already many at home.” he mentioned, pointing with his gaze to the shelf above the fireplace, full of cacti of different sizes.

“For the lab…something small with green leaves maybe with flowers...” He can hear the small tone of excitement in your voice.

Viktor looked at you curiously. “What do you want it for?”

“For you. The doctors say plants help reduce stress.”

He smiled, a wonderful expression on his face. “Do you think a plant can handle that place?”

“I have faith in it. Just like in you.”

He takes a few seconds to look at you, there is tenderness in his gaze. He is not good with plants, in fact he agreed to have cacti only because they were easy to take care of since basically nothing happened if he forgot about it for a few days, a plant like the one you wanted requires more care but… he is not willing to say no to you, if you want it that way that will be and he will take care of that plant better than anyone else.

“A plant it is then.” He sighs. His figure moves beside you, before you know it he’s picking up the plates.

“Leave the plates, I’ll wash them,” you say, quickly getting up from the couch as Viktor begins to stack the cups and plates on the coffee table.

“No need. I’ll do it,” he replies calmly, already focused on the task. His hands move with the same precision he uses in the lab, carefully stacking each plate to keep them from falling.

“Viktor, I’m your guest. You can’t wash the dishes,” you insist, stepping forward to take the plates from his hands.

He raises an eyebrow, his expression reflecting a mix of amusement and stubbornness. “Guest? You’ve been here so many times that I could claim my bedroom. There’s no point in arguing this.” You reach for the last plate, but Viktor pushes it away with a swift movement. “It’s just a small task. It’s nothing complicated.”

“But—”

“There are no ‘buts’.” He gives you a look, serious but not harsh. It’s more like a silent declaration of victory. “I’ll take care of it.”

Resigned, you sigh and cross your arms, watching him from the couch as he stacks the plates like a jenga and heads toward the kitchen. However, as he stands up with the stack of plates in his hands, he suddenly stops halfway.

For a moment, you don’t understand what’s going on. His back is slightly bent, his posture rigid. Then, he turns his face slightly toward you, his lips pressed into a tight line.

“What’s wrong?” you ask, moving closer with concern.

“A small… inconvenience,” he says in a tone that tries to sound calm, although you notice the stiffness in his voice.

You move closer and see the reason: one of the glasses is dangerously tilted, about to fall. His hands are too busy holding the others and holding onto the cane; moving just a millimeter could lead to disaster.

“Let me help you,” you offer with a smile you can’t help.

“No. It’s under control,” Viktor insists, although his tone lacks the firmness it had before.

“Sure? Because you look like you’re a second away from creating an experiment on the fragility of ceramics.”

His lips curve into a slight smile, but his attention remains fixed on the plates. With a quick but gentle movement, you slide your hands over to catch the wayward glass before it falls.

Viktor shoots you a look, his eyes shining with a mix of gratitude and resignation. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Now, can you admit that you need help from time to time?”

He sighs, shaking his head as he continues on his way to the kitchen. “No. But I’ll let you believe it, this time.”

You roll your eyes in response.

“How about I wash them and you dry them?” he offers.

“Fine.”

You watch him sitting at the breakfast bar watching him thoroughly wash each plate, glass, and cutlery, drying his hands on a kitchen towel.

“All yours,” he says as he leaves the kitchen, which is too small for the two of them. “I’m going to go take a shower.”

“Do you want some company?” His figure tenses up like a cat, stopping only to turn around slightly to find a mischievous smile on your face.

“Nice try.” A stifled laugh escapes his lips before he disappears down the hall and it’s not long before you hear the sound of running water.

The dim light of the bathroom bathed the tense lines of Viktor's figure, reflecting his thinness and the sharp features that marked his skin. Viktor took off his shirt with slow, almost mechanical movements. He had always avoided looking at his nakedness in the mirror, the reflection of a weak man made him sick, but this time the mirror gave him a different image. When he took off his shirt he discovered that on his torso his ribs were barely noticeable, his abdomen was no longer sunken and even a tiny roll of fat had formed in the lower part. He was still thin, but when he touched him he felt muscles and not just his bones, his pale skin had taken on more softness and color. The wounds left by his corset had stopped being reddened furrows and were now barely noticeable.

He caressed his neck, slightly hunched, free of tension. The scars on his side, reminders of medical procedures, were no longer like cracks, but just soft marks.

As he unbuttoned his pants, he braced himself with one hand on the wall for balance. His outer brace trembled slightly. With a methodical movement, he removed the metal piece, carefully setting it aside, as if it were an extension of himself that he could not despise.

He felt like a different person, naked in front of the mirror, admiring a more vivid reflection of himself, his hands running over his muscles that were once tired and sore, now looking strong and energetic. He smiled a little, hesitantly. For the first time, he liked what he saw in the mirror and he knew who he had to thank for that.

Steam began to fill the room as he adjusted the water to hot for the comfort of his leg. Once naked, Viktor stood still for a moment, letting the moisture envelop his skin. His body, although marked by a certain fragility, radiated an unbreakable strength, feeling each scar with something other than disgust for the first time in a long time. His eyes closed, enjoying that shower like no other.

After finishing putting away the dishes, you peeked into the hallway. You found him sitting on the bed, wearing baggy pajama pants and his shirt covering his naked torso, his head in his hands and his eyes fixed on his leg. His posture was rigid, filled with a tension that you could almost feel in the air.

You didn't say anything at first, because you knew that what he needed wasn't words, but company. You approached silently, crossing the hallway and sat down next to him, placing a hand on his good knee.

"Does it hurt?" you finally asked, your voice barely a whisper.

Viktor nodded, not raising his head. "A little. There are times when... it feels like it's never going to go away." He internally cursed himself, the whole day had passed without problems, with barely any discomfort, he didn't understand why the pain decided to attack him right now, it was as if it was mocking him.

Your chest tightened at his vulnerability. You knew how much he hated showing weakness, even with you.

"Let me help…"

He stared at you for a moment, as if considering your words. He finally nodded with a sigh. You knelt in front of him, placing his leg over your lap, pushing his pajama bottoms up to his thigh, your cold fingers giving him goosebumps where you touched them. The internal mechanism of the device on his leg was simpler but no less aggressive, as you removed the straps you could hear small gasps coming from Viktor’s mouth, his hand crumpling the sheets beside him, his skin reddening as the pressure of the device disappeared. Once the device was off you followed the usual nightly ritual, sliding your hands up his leg, applying pressure to the right spot and massaging the tense muscles in his leg and foot, you were precise, almost surgical, as you moved your hands up his leg with extreme gentleness. At first his muscles were tense but slowly you felt them relax under your touch. Finally, the tense grimace changed to a placid, lazy expression of relief as the pain faded.

"Better…" he murmured after a while. His voice sounded calmer.

“See? I’m good at this.” you said as you stood up to sit beside him on his bed.

He laughed softly, his low, warm laugh filling the space. “Maybe I should hire you as my personal physical therapist.”

“You couldn’t pay me enough.” you teased, giving him a soft poke on his nose. “But lucky for you, I do this because I care about you.” Your hands slid down his back, taking the shirt with you, exposing his medical corset. It took you a little more technique to remove it, a couple of twists here and the movement of the levers on his shoulder blades were enough to make the heavy structure give way, pulling it over his head and leaving it on the floor under the nightstand. Your hands caressed his bare back, his skin pale as sweet milk and warm as the first rays of the sun in the day.

He took your hand then, bringing it to his lips to place a soft kiss on your fingers and murmur against them, “How lucky I am…”

“You have no idea…” you said, sliding your hand up his arm to his cheek. He looked totally sleepy but willing to simply adjust his posture and have your lips meet his in a slow, delicate brush, more sensation than intention. His messy hair falling over his forehead, tickling the bridge of your nose.

Without saying anything, his fingers slowly slide up your cheek, warm and a little clumsy, as if even in his sleepy state he wanted to make sure he touched you carefully. His thumb traces a small circle against your skin, and his lips, barely curved in a lazy smile, murmur your name, so low it almost seems like a sigh.

You lean into him, unable to resist the closeness he himself seeks. Viktor, so practical and rational during the day, now seems completely given over to the moment. The whole world had been reduced to that single point of contact.

There is no rush in the kiss, only a sweetness heavy with tiredness, as if sleep were pulling at him but he couldn’t help but stay with you a little longer. His lips are warm, soft, and his breathing, calm but irregular, mixes with yours.

When the kiss breaks you don’t know how, but you’ve ended up lying on the bed, his lips barely separating from yours, staying so close that you can feel the heat of his breath against your skin. His eyes half-closed, they look at you with a softness that melts any thought.

“I have a gift for you…” his voice is barely a whisper against your lips “Can you bring my bag please?” he asked, dragging one of your locks of hair behind your ear. You close your eyes, you're so comfortable that you don't want to separate from him. "Honey... please..." his words completely disarm you, the air leaves your lungs and you have to drag him back inside, it's the first time he calls you that...

You didn't expect it, you don't know what to do or say next. "I... amhmm... I... will go get your bag..." you murmur unsurely as you basically flee the room with your heart racing. You may have heard Viktor's giggle behind you but maybe it was just your nerves playing a bad joke on you.

When you returned with the bag to the room Viktor has lifted his torso from the bed and holds a small package wrapped excellently in ornate paper in his hands. You crawl to his side on the bed, cautiously dragging his bag, was sending you for it, a trick?

The air in the room is charged with a quiet expectation as Viktor leans forward slightly, holding a box wrapped in dark, elegant paper. His fingers, always careful, seem a little tenser than usual, as if the act of handing you the gift is more intimidating than he imagined.

“This is for you,” he says, his voice low but firm, though you notice the slight tremor in his words. He hands it to you, but doesn’t look directly at you; his eyes fixate on some indefinite spot, as if he’s not entirely sure how you’ll react.

You take the box, feeling the unexpected weight in your hands. You watch him, searching for some clue in his expression, but Viktor just crosses his arms, adopting a posture that could be interpreted as casual, though his slightly stiff shoulders give it away.

“Open it,” he murmurs, and his eyes finally meet yours, shining with a mix of nervousness and something deeper, something you can only describe as affection.

As you open the paper, you discover a retro-designed camera, impeccable, with a simple elegance that suits him perfectly. You blink, surprised, as he leans over to turn it on. Before you can ask, his hand rummages through his bag, showing you the small Hextech gem and to your utter astonishment he places it inside the camera mechanism. The room lights up for a moment before Viktor presses a button and the magic begins.

At first, music is the first thing you can hear, then like real magic you see a series of hologram images all around the room: you and him together at different moments, some captured in secret, others you remember clearly. Laughter, glances, small everyday gestures. Then, the photos change to your favorite things: books, landscapes, objects you love, letters you’ve never read written in his own handwriting, every detail carefully collected.

And then, his voice.

“My name is Viktor and…” he begins, his tone deep but soft, with that meticulous cadence that characterizes him. “This is for my dear Y/N. A record of shared moments, of laughter, of everything you represent to me, of everything she is and everything she have allowed me to be.”

Your eyes glaze over as the images continue: your first photo together, a romantic poem, even the portrait of you both that an artist had made on your first date after leaving the hospital, your favorite flowers, things only someone in love would choose.

“It’s an archive of memories,” his voice continues, “but also a reminder to me. That no matter how chaotic the world is, there’s always beauty in the small moments. And in all of these moments, there’s her.”

When the voice ends, the silence that remains is overwhelming, laden with emotions you can’t put into words. You look up at Viktor, who now seems unable to meet your gaze, his cheeks totally red.

“I wasn’t sure if it would be too much.." he admits, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “But I thought… maybe you’d like it. You’ve done so much for me…”

You lean into him, setting the camera aside, and wrap your hands around his neck. “Too much?” Viktor, this is perfect...”

His lips curve into a small but genuine smile, and even though he tries to hide it, you can see the relief and joy in his eyes. This gesture, so meticulous and full of love, is irrefutable proof of how much you mean to him.

The weight of what you just saw is still present in your chest, warm and overwhelming. The camera is off to the side, forgotten for the moment, because now all your attention is on him. Viktor is still in front of you, clearly nervous but trying to keep his composure, as if you don’t know how to handle your emotions at this moment.

“What’s wrong?” he asks quietly, with that analytical look that never seems to completely fade. But there’s something else in his eyes now: a mix of vulnerability and hope, as if he’s not sure if his gift had had the impact he expected.

You don’t need words to answer him.

You move toward him in one motion, your hands gripping the sides of his face before he can react. His skin is warm beneath your fingers, and for an instant, you can feel his breathing hitch, caught between wonder and anticipation.

“You’re amazing,” you murmur against his lips, and before he can process it, you kiss him.

The kiss is urgent, charged with everything you feel and everything you can’t put into words. It’s like you want to tear down any remaining doubts he might have about how much you love him. Your lips move with a desperate hunger, as if you’re seeking to etch into him every emotion he’s provoked in you.

It takes Viktor a second to react, but when he does, he kisses you back with equal intensity. His hands, ever careful, grip your waist, pulling you closer to him as if he needs to have you closer. There’s no longer any shyness in his movements, only the restrained passion of someone who’s been waiting for this moment without realizing it.

His breathing is fast, ragged, and you can feel his lips tremble slightly against yours, not out of insecurity, but from the torrent of emotions that overwhelms him. One of his arms wraps around you, while his other hand moves up to tangle in your hair, holding you with a firmness you’ve never felt from him before.

When you finally part, you’re both breathless. His eyes, normally calm and focused, now shine with a mix of wonder and devotion. His lips are red, and a smile, small but sincere, forms on his face.

“I wasn’t expecting that,” he says, his voice huskier than usual.

“Did it bother you?” you ask, still panting, your hands still on his face.

“Disturb me?..” Viktor lets out a soft laugh and shakes his head, his forehead touching yours. “I couldn’t. But… I might need another demonstration to be completely sure.”

His playful tone, combined with the way he looks at you, makes your heart race again. “Cheeky…” Without saying a word, your eyes drift to the camera still resting to the side. You take the camara with firm but hurried hands, turning it on as he looks at you with a mix of curiosity and confusion.

“What are you doing?” he asks softly, tilting his head.

“I want this saved too,” you reply with a mischievous smile, holding the camera in the air, above the both of you.

Before Viktor can react or say anything else, you lean towards him again on the bed, capturing his lips in a kiss filled with all the love you feel. This time, the kiss is more confident, more determined, as if you both know exactly what you mean to each other.

With the camera in one hand, you press the button, the click barely perceptible between the racing beat of your heart and the soft whisper of his breath against your lips.

When the kiss ends, you both stand there, foreheads together, sharing a soft laugh, as if the simple act of capturing that moment makes it even more special.

The photo joins the rest floating around the room, and you see the image: the two of you locked in a kiss, your hand holding the camera, his hair a little messy, and his face slightly tilted toward you, as if his entire world is contained in that instant.

“Perfect,” you say quietly, stroking your thumb along the edge of the camera before turning back to him.

Viktor looks at the photo, and though he doesn’t say anything, the soft smile on his face says it all. You grab the camera and add the image to the video, where that photo now sits as part of the collection. One more memory that encapsulates not only who you are, but what you mean to each other.

He looks at you once more, his golden eyes shining with something you could swear is pride. “I think this is my favorite memory so far,” he murmurs, taking your hand delicately, as if afraid the moment might fade away.

And in that instant, you know that no matter how much time passes, that photo—and this kiss—will always be unforgettable.

N/A: I'm sorry for the delay, my dog died and I didn't have the strength to do anything other than be in bed. I really hope you like it and it was what you expected.

[bearsbadblog]

"Gloating in your last moments," I spit through gritted teeth, trying to hold in the pain. "Pathetic."

The demon laughs. It's a cold, rattling sound. "I suppose it is pathetic to find something in common with a human." Its shadowy form flickers, a sign of the last pieces of its consciousness fading from this realm.

My own consciousness is also hanging on by a thread. My right arm is gone at the shoulder, and I'm losing a lot of blood way too quickly.

"Two abandoned servants, dying at the bottom of a dungeon," the demon sighs.

"Shut it," I snap, while weakly trying to rip my shirt to make a makeshift bandage. "I'm not..." I pause to take a breath. It feels like I'm running out of air. "I'm not going to die here."

It flickers again, then starts to fade, ever so slightly. "Let me help you."

I don't respond to it. I don't have time for this nonsense. I try to unbuckle my breastplate, my fingers clumsy with numbness and slippery with sweat.

It reaches out to me.

"No!" I try to pull away from it. "I don't---hngh--" I'm trying to speak through the pain, but it's difficult. "I don't need your help!"

Its shadowy hand makes contact with my forehead and seems to suck all the pain out of me. I'm left feeling weak, cold, and tired.

"What did you do to me?" I rasp.

"You know I feed off suffering," it says. "Don't worry. It won't heal me. I'm too far gone for that."

I slog through my tired thoughts to find something to say to that, and settle on the only thing there really is to say: "...thank you."

"Don't thank me," it says. "I can't stop you from dying, only take away the pain. Unless...you let me in."

It looks at me with silver eyes, a kind of expectant look on its murky face. I know what it's referring to. It wants to possess me.

"We can stop each other's bleeding," it says. Its voice sounds far away now, as if it's in a long tunnel.

Possession is a risky thing. Both the demon's mind and the human's mind are damaged beyond repair afterward, meaning that, even if an exorcism is performed, there are lasting consequences. The partnership this demon was proposing would be permanent.

"Neither of us has to die for someone else." The demon's voice is soft. There's an emotion there. Something like hope.

I look at my bloodied hand, then hold it out. "We can help each other."

It smiles. "Thank you," it says, and takes my hand.

When I emerge from the dungeon, I am someone else.

You’re a mercenary hired by adventurers to defeat the boss. After the battle, they loot the treasure and abandon you wounded. The defeated boss crawls over and says, “Guess we’re both expendable, huh?”

[sillymommy6969]

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝕬NGEL BABY

Katseye x fem!reader

summary: katseye’s eldest can’t seem to get enough of her bandmates, who gave them the permission to be so cute? here’s a compilation of moments y/n has had with every individual member of Katseye, handpicked by eyekons <3

warnings: none, just fluffy moments

Y/N ABSOLUTELY BEING LOVE DRUNK ON THE KATZ (FT. YOONCHAE AS A CO-PARENT)

Sophia Laforteza: On an interview with Billboard playing “How well do you know your bandmates?”, Y/N and Sophia were sat next to each other.

The interview was going smoothly—at least, that’s how it seemed at first. The band had gathered in a chic, minimalist room for the Billboard video. But it didn’t take long for the interviewer’s eyes to flicker between Y/N and Sophia, both of them sitting a little too close, Y/N’s knee brushing Sophia’s. It wasn’t unusual for them to be near each other, but today, something felt different.

Y/N had been unusually clingy all day. She kept stealing glances at Sophia, leaning in just a little too much when speaking, and the way she kept hovering around her made it obvious: they were really attached today. The rest of the girls noticed it almost immediately, but none of them could resist having a little fun with it.

“So, we’re here with Katseye,” the interviewer began with a bright smile. “It’s great to have you all here. And, of course, the music speaks for itself. But... I have to ask—Y/N, is everything alright? You seem a little... extra close to Sophia today.”

Y/N blinked, caught off guard, but tried to play it cool, leaning back in her chair just slightly. “I—I’m fine. Just... you know. Just hanging out. No big deal.”

Sophia, who had been quietly observing her bandmate’s behavior, shot a playful smile at Y/N, the corners of her lips curving up. She knew exactly what was going on but wasn’t about to call them out too loudly—at least not yet. The others laughed at their eldest member being teased for her affectionate nature, unable to resist the urge to poke fun at the woman themselves.

“Oh, it’s definitely a big deal,” Manon said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “Y/N’s got a serious attachment to Sophia today. Haven’t seen her this clingy in a while.”

Lara, ever the instigator, chimed in. “It’s like they’re physically connected. It’s honestly impressive. I didn’t know two people could share the same personal space so literally.”

Daniela added with a sly grin, “Yeah, Y/N, are you trying to move in with Sophia and kick poor Yoonchae out? I can already see the ‘sophisticated roommate’ aesthetic forming.”

“More like an ‘and they were roommates’ aesthetic,” Megan chimed, cackling at her own joke.

Y/N, cheeks flushed, glanced down at her hands. “I’m not—! It’s not like that, guys. I’m just... I don’t know. Feeling close to Sophia today, alright? Is that a crime?”

Sophia, who had been trying to stifle a laugh, leaned in with a teasing glint in her eyes. “It’s really fine, guys,” she said to the interviewer, her voice light but carrying a touch of mischief. “Y/N’s just a little extra affectionate today. They’ve got a lot of love to give, I guess.”

The interviewer raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “It’s definitely something we’re noticing,” they replied with a grin. “But, Y/N, is this a regular thing? Or is this just a special day?”

Y/N shifted uncomfortably, feeling the heat rise in her cheeks. “I mean, can you blame me? I guess Sophia’s looking a little too cute today, I needed to support her.”

“Supportive, huh?” Manon smirked, leaning forward in her chair. “You know, I’ve heard of having each other’s backs, but you’re practically on Sophia’s back at this point.”

Lara let out a laugh. “Yeah, you’re like her human shadow. I’m surprised she hasn’t told you to take a step back and breathe for a second.”

Y/N sighed and rubbed the back of her neck. “Okay, okay, I get it. I’m clingy today. But it’s not that bad.”

“That bad?” Daniela teased, crossing her arms. “I mean, we did see you whisper something into Sophia’s ear a minute ago. Was that an emergency cuddle request?”

Sophia, still chuckling at the whole situation, nudged Y/N with her shoulder, a soft but knowing look on her face. “Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere.”

Y/N groaned, her face turning redder by the second. “You guys are the worst. Can we please talk about the album? Or literally anything else? Please.”

The interviewer laughed along with the rest of the band, clearly enjoying the dynamic between the bandmates. “Sure, sure,” they said, still grinning. “But one last question before we move on—Y/N, are you sure there’s not something more going on with you and Sophia? The way you’re sitting so close, it’s starting to look like a rom-com.”

“As if you guys wouldn’t kill to be the co-lead in a rom-com with Sophia.” Y/N protested, but even she couldn’t keep the smile off her face.

Manon shook her head. “Yeah, right. We’ve got the whole thing figured out. Can’t fool us, Y/N.”

The band erupted into laughter, and Y/N, despite being embarrassed, couldn’t help but join in. Sophia nudged her again, a quiet reassurance in her touch, and in that moment, Y/N realized—despite the teasing, the awkwardness, and the jokes—Sophia wasn’t going anywhere. Neither were any of their bandmates.

But even as the conversation shifted, the warmth between Y/N and Sophia didn’t go unnoticed—Sophia and Y/N, best ship?

Manon Bannerman: During Manon’s live when she was trying on different wigs and outfits, Y/N joined in halfway through the live just watching her try differnet things on like a personal modelling show

As Manon tossed her cap aside to fish through her pile of clothes for another hat, Y/N kept her phone company to carry on with the live. Fans could hear Manon make noises here and there as she dug through her closet, but most of them were pretty engaged with the woman reading their comments.

“‘Y/N, what’s your favourite thing about Manon?’ Oh, that’s a very good question,” Y/N announced, looking up to ponder about the question. “There’s so many things I love about her.”

“You’re such a cheeseball, you freak nasty hoe.”

Y/N chuckled at Manon’s remark, glancing between Manon changing and the camera, making sure the Ghanaian singer was kept offscreen as she switched into a new outfit.

“I would say… Manon definitely pulls me out of my comfort zone a lot. She takes me to places to do things I never would’ve done myself if I wasn’t with her,” Y/N chuckled, “I’ve become so much more comfortable being myself with different people on different places thanks to her. She’s really molded me into the person I am today.”

Manon coos, pouting and throwing the older an ‘aww’.

“Yeah, I’m really grateful for Manon, but she can also be a real loud spirit sometimes.” Y/N mumbled through gritted teeth to the camera, leaning forward as if telling the eyekons a secret.

“Hey, way to ruin the moment,” Manon barked, tossing a hoodie straight at her head.

As the older squealed in surprise at the material colliding with her head, it gradually morphed into a stunned gasp at the outfit Manon had put on. Her hands flew to cover her mouth as her eyes widened, the live grew silent for a moment before Manon’s laughter at Y/N’s reaction rung evidently.

“Oh my God, you look absolutely stunning, babe. Get in here right the hell now,” Y/N reached out, her hand grabbing at Manon’s arm to drag the woman into frame.

Manon did a little spin for the camera, pouting and winking as she flaunted her outfit. She had a camo cap on, a skin-tight dollar bill shirt and some low waisted dark blue jorts that showed off her slender figure.

“Face card, lethal. Body, tea. Oh my God, this woman.”

Y/N gasped, a hand over her chest and falling backwards to lie flat on the floor. She crossed her arms, closing her eyes. “I’m actually dead. Dead by being gagged by such a pretty lady.”

Manon’s infectious laughter reverberated off the walls of the room, leaning backwards and away from the camera to drape herself over Y/N in a tight embrace. The two of them a clump on the floor, the fans spent the next two minutes just watching them laugh and cuddle.

“Wait, wait, I want you to do a catwalk.” Y/N perked up.

She repositioned the phone, ushering for Manon to stand at the other side of the room. Holding up three fingers to countdown, Manon began strutting her way towards the camera. Y/N let out wolf whistles, a hand over her mouth to muffle a squeal as she hyped the woman up.

“God is a woman and she’s posing for me,” Y/N teased, “I’m the luckiest woman alive.”

Maybe Y/N and Manon is the best ship in Katseye, who else showers their friend with compliments the way Y/N does?

Daniela Avanzini: [ KATSEYE VLOG ] Dance Practice for 2024 MAMA Awards (Mainly Daniela & Y/N Goofing Off)

Moving with the beat had never been a problem for Y/N, the woman practically had perfect rhythm. It was what made her such a talented producer, she could forge a beat out of anything with just her mouth. But something about this choreography was stumping the eldest member of Katseye, and no matter how many times she’d ask their instructor about it, she still just couldn’t get the hang of it.

Daniela and Megan were in their own little world, already syncing together for the next part of the choreography none of the others had learnt yet.

The camera panned from the main dancers to Y/N, who seemed to be struggling to execute a certain back-bend motion smoothly. Sophia was beside her, picking up tips on how to make her motions more fluid as well. After a couple seconds of footage of them just trying, it cut to Y/N waving a hand and walking off after thanking their instructor.

The camera followed the Katseye member to their water station, where the girl eyed the camera, shaking her head.

“I’m tapped out. I love a challenge, and I’m grateful they gave me the move instead of one of the other girls, but this is taking me out.” She mumbled to the camera, sloshing around a mouthful of water before swallowing it. Sweaty and exposed, Y/N fanned herself. “If you’re watching this after the MAMA performance, please don’t hate on me. I really tried here, Eyekons, I’m just not flexible enough.”

Done with the next section of the choreography, Daniela decided to stroll over to the camera, still trained on Y/N.

She could see why the crew was focusing on her more, she was wearing a wife-beater and some really low waisted gray sweats. It was the gym guy combo most tiktok’s loved thirsting over. Smart PR move to appeal to that audience.

Taken aback by Daniela coming onscreen, Y/N hadn’t anticipated the hug the younger member was about to entrap her in. Nonetheless, her arms were open and she welcomed the Latina into frame. “Oh, Dani, perfect timing. I actually needed to ask you for a quick favour.”

The blonde nodded, “Shoot.”

“I know you’re in the centre for this move, but I wanted to know if there was any tricks I can use to be able to make the transition between me standing and me falling to my knees to bend smoother.” Y/N’s hands rested on her hips, watching the Latina’s expression twitch as she thought of ways to help.

“Okay, wait, show me what you’re doing now.”

The camera backed away, giving the two space before Y/N ran through the moves once. She ended with the move on the floor, sitting before staring back up at Daniela for a reaction.

The Latina clapped, “That was already pretty smooth, I don’t even know how to make it look better than it already does.”

“Dani…” Y/N whined, propping herself up, “Stop being nice and just tell me the truth. That move felt clunkier than an elephant tap dancing.”

Daniela giggled at the older’s joke, leaning against her with an arm over her shoulder. “I can assure you, Y/N, you’re undermining yourself. You look so much better than you think you do.”

Y/N suddenly bent down, picking the Latina up and setting her over her shoulder with her ass in the air, earning a loud shrill scream from Daniela. The camera followed the two, panning from a red Daniela forwards to Y/N, who was carrying her around the room.

“Dani’s too nice for her own good, but if I could just kidnap and have her be mine forever, I would.”

Come on, Daniela wouldn’t let anybody else do that to her, Dann/n truthers where we at?

Lara Raj: [ WEVERSE LIVE ] KICKBACK STUDIO SESSION WITH LARA & Y/N

“No, no, we love Surf Curse. Lara and I have actually been talking about producing a song on the next that’s like an indie rock vibe, but I don’t think we’ve got the go for it yet.” Y/N announced, her focus on the computer in front of her as her hand tinkered with the soundboard. She had an electric guitar in her lap, a pick in her free hand and you could see Lara holding a microphone in the background.

“Yeah, we absolutely love The Backseat Lovers, uh… Wallows, Hotel Ugly—Y/N and I have a designated playlist just for indie rock,” Lara said. “Wait, should we show them the demo we’ve been working on? Like just the chorus or something?”

The older shrugged, glancing over at her phone sitting on the table, the immediate influx of comments urging them to play their song was criminal. Y/N chuckled at the fans’ reaction, “I think they really, really want to hear it.”

Lara nodded, “Then let’s get it.”

Y/N searched for a file among her many saved demos in her folder, clicking on one titled, “Growing Old (the one by the narwhals)”. Lara nodded, flipping through their songbook of lyrics to find the page that was titled the same. It was definitely one of both their favourites, of all the demos they have produced together.

“Okay, guys, so basically I’ve recorded the drums and bass to this song, but I’ll be playing the main tune on my guitar. Lara will be singing it and if you guys like it, we might pitch it to our team to get it on the next comeback.” Y/N said, looking back at the Indian singer, who gave her a thumbs up.

Clicking the space bar on her keyboard, it played.

“I’m growing old… my thoughts are changing, but will you change with me?” Lara’s silky voice rung into the microphone, the only sound in the room over the rough music. Y/N nodded along, fingers working the guitar strings as her eyes watched her bandmate intently. “Oh, will you change with me?”

user01 omg Y/N’s literally in love

user02 Need someone to look at me the way Y/N looks at Lara

user03 IF SOMEONE WROTE THIS FOR ME ID FOLD

user04 they’re stronger than me cuz i’d fall in love

As about thirty seconds of their song played, Y/N had a big smile on her face, bearing her teeth in pride as she clicked for the track to come to a halt.

The moment the song ended, the older set her guitar, nearly tackling the Indian to the floor in a bear hug.

“Oh my God, you’re actually a Godsend,” Y/N squealed, “That song will never ever get old because it’s you singing it to me.”

user05 SHES SO GF FOR THAT??

user06 Why is Y/N so shippable

user07 you can’t convince me lar/n isn’t real

“It’s only ‘cuz you wrote that sick tune. I think with the amount of people loving this right now, there’s a good chance it’ll be on the next album,” Lara nodded towards the positive feedback flooding the comment section.

“Guys, when I’m telling you I’m actually the luckiest woman alive to be able to sit and hear that voice over and over again, I’m not exaggerating.” Y/N squeezed the younger’s shoulder.

No, it is 100% Lar/N. A studio match made in heaven.

Megan Skiendiel: Katseye was gathered around a PR package sent by Olivia Rodrigo to be opened, Megan and Y/N were sat at the back of the group as Sophia and Manon did most of the speeches to thank Olivia.

“Thank you, Olivia, so much for the gifts, we love you and we can’t wait to see you.” Sophia spoke to the camera, “So, onto the unboxing of the package.”

As the girls ripped apart the package and explored the snacks and trinkets in the box, Megan and Y/N were fond of the bag of popcorn that was left in the box. Y/N immediately popped open the bag, letting the younger grab a handful first before she dug into it herself. Megan hummed, feeling the popcorn melt on her tongue with a foreign taste.

When Y/N popped one into her mouth, she immediately scurried to check the bag, her frantic motion catching the girls’ attention.

“Babe, there’s cinnamon in this,” Y/N said, pouncing to her feet to go grab a tissue paper from a staff member. Megan froze, eyes darting between the stunned Katseye members and the cameras. When Y/N came back onscreen, she shielded Megan from the cameras, holding the tissue over the Chinese girl’s mouth so she would spit it out. She then wiped her lips clean, brushing hair away from her face as Megan fixed herself up.

“For reference, Megan’s allergic to cinnamon,” Lara chimed, glancing back at the latter in concern.

The girls turned their full attention back to Megan. “How are you feeling now?”

Megan nodded slowly, her breathing finally returning to normal. “Good. Y/N caught it before I swallowed, so hopefully I don’t die. Thanks, Y/N.”

“Of course,” Y/N insisted, crossing their arms and settling in beside her. “You rest. I’m keeping watch. You’re not going anywhere until I’m sure you’re okay.”

Megan rolled her eyes but smiled. “Okay, Mom.”

Y/N just shrugged. “Yeah, I just saved your life, so... you better keep that attitude to a minimum, Skiendiel.”

Megan shook her head, but there was no denying the gratitude in her eyes. The bandmates were often playful with each other, but in moments like this, it was clear that they were more than just a group—they were family. And Y/N, in their usual overbearing way, wasn’t going to let anyone slip through the cracks.

Megan sighed theatrically. “Fine, I guess I’ll survive with you hovering over me.”

Sophia chuckled softly, turning back to the PR package they had abandoned earlier. “Well, I’m just glad you’re both okay.”

“Don’t worry,” Y/N said, their grin widening. “I’ll make sure Megan doesn’t eat anymore popcorn this time. There’s an epipen right there just in case.”

And with that, they stayed together, a little closer than usual, but with a quiet understanding that, no matter what, they had each other’s backs.

Y/N really babied Megan… #Y/gan anybody?

Jeong Yoonchae: [ KATSEYE VLOG ] Behind the Scenes of Making “Touch” Music Video

The set was bustling with energy. Crew members scurried around, adjusting cameras and lights, while stylists and makeup artists made final touch-ups on each band member. It was the day of Katseye’s highly anticipated music video shoot, and the excitement was palpable. With every moment, the vibe on set grew more intense—until it became clear that two members of the band, in particular, were completely lost in their own little world.

Y/N and Yoonchae had their looks touched up first, leaving the two of them ready and alone next to the set while other members got their looks done.

“I’m so excited for this! It’s like a—like a…!” Yoonchae said, hopping from one foot to the other as she adjusted her outfit. She was trying to find the word for what she was feeling, but her accent made it all the more adorable.

Y/N watched her with an amused expression, smiling at the camera at her excitement. “Dream come true?”

Yoonchae nodded, grabbing Y/N’s arm. “Yes, dream come true! It’s so cool! Look at the lights, the cameras…” She waved her hands dramatically, gesturing toward the crew, and then flopped onto a nearby chair. “Y/N, I always thought music video shoots were more glamorous. But it’s kind of chaotic.”

Y/N chuckled, walking over and sitting down next to her. “Yeah, for all the eyekons watching at home, there’s so many things going on at once here right now. We’re working really hard to give you guys the best video ever.”

Yoonchae looked at them, eyes curved. “Yes!”

Y/N’s smile grew. “You’re right,” they said dramatically. “I have to be the mature one. The one who has everything under control. No falling or tripping allowed.”

“Well,” Yoonchae began with a mischievous grin, “that’s not what I heard last night.”

Y/N raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. “What do you mean by that?”

Yoonchae leaned in, lowering her voice as if telling a juicy secret. “I heard... from Manon...” She paused for dramatic effect. “That you, Y/N, have the worst luck when it comes to... stage outfits.” She grinned even wider.

Y/N groaned, sinking further into the chair, clearly mortified. “Oh, no. Don’t you dare. That was one time.”

But Yoonchae was enjoying this too much. “One time? Wasn’t it, like, three times? Or four?” She pulled out her phone and started to scroll through her pictures, clearly looking for the embarrassing photo evidence. “Wait, I have a picture...”

“Yoonchae,” Y/N whined, slapping a hand to her forehead, “I swear, if you show that picture—”

But it was too late. Yoonchae had found it. She turned the phone toward the camera with a wicked grin on her face. The photo was a candid shot of Y/N from one of their earlier shoots, where she’d tripped over a cable, lost her balance, and ended up on the ground in an ungraceful heap. To make matters worse, she were wearing a sparkling strapless top that seemed to be caught on the edge of the stage, adding to the chaos. Yoonchae was laughing so hard she could barely breathe, while Y/N simply buried her face in her hands.

“Yoonchae!” Y/N exclaimed, half-laughing, half-sighing in defeat. “Why would you do this to me?”

“You look so cute!” Yoonchae protested, still laughing uncontrollably. “It makes me really happy.”

Y/N groaned, her cheeks flushing. “I’ll admit, it was embarrassing, but—”

“You admit?” Yoonchae interrupted, cutting them off. “You looked like a baby deer.” Yoonchae collapsed into her chair, clutching her stomach as she continued to laugh.

Y/N shook her head, clearly trying to maintain their dignity. “You’re so cruel, you know that? You’re lucky you’re the youngest. If I were the youngest, I’d be way more merciless.”

Yoonchae stuck out her tongue, teasing. “That’s because you’re old, and you’ve got to be all serious and responsible.”

Y/N let out an exaggerated sigh, shaking her head into the camera, pretending to be resigned to her fate. “Alright, fine, I’ll give you that one. But I’m never telling you another embarrassing story again.”

Yoonchae’s eyes widened in mock horror. “You have to!”

Y/N shot her a look, pretending to be stern. “I’m serious, Yoonchae. I’ll tell everybody but you.”

But Yoonchae only pouted, clasping her hands together in a pleading gesture. “Please, please, tell me more! I’m begging you! I’ll be really sad if you don’t!”

Y/N rolled her eyes but couldn’t hold back the smile tugging at their lips. “Fine. But only because you said ‘please’.” They paused, thinking for a moment. “Okay, how about the time I accidentally dyed my hair neon green before a concert?”

Yoonchae gasped. “No way! Tell me more!”

Y/N, now fully enjoying the teasing, leaned in closer. “Well, I thought it would be a fun, bold look, but the dye got all over my hands, my clothes, and the stage lights made it look like I had an actual glow-in-the-dark head. It was so embarrassing that I wore a hat for the entire set. Not one person told me I looked ridiculous. Not even you!”

Yoonchae gasped dramatically. “How could I not tell you? I think I need to have a word with our bandmates.”

Best sibling dynamic, hands down.

[elyxir1zz]

★ — Enemies to Lovers  w/ sevika

CW : age gap , oral sex , THE STRAP , ditzy reader , brat taming , dirty talk , caught in the act

A/N : part 2 maybe coming soon

Summary : sevika being madly inlove wih you but masks hate over it. you were silcos biological daughter. silco barley paid attention to you and you were getting bored of the men from the bar.

MINORS AND MEN DNI

You held your breath watching sevika walk into silcos office with her arm broken and shimmer leaking on the ground. You sat on his couch with your knees to your chest, “the sister is back” she said, out of breath “from the dead?!” Silco turned to look at her. “She attacked me at a card game” sevika leaned on the other couch “wait,” you say moving your feet down, “she attacked you?! And you lost?” you laugh “i didn't lose, she had some girl enforcer with her” the brunette said looking at the floor “winners don't have excuses” you say giggling. “Keep patronizing me and i'll tear that laugh from your throat-” sevika was cut off by silco “sevika.” he started “y/n, leave.”

“What-” you furrow your brows as Sevika hid her smirk. Silcos face showed he wasn't joking as you stood up. Your silk dress barely covers anything as you leave, you press your ear against the door when you close it behind you. “You raised her to dress like that?” sevika looked over to silco “my focus was jinx. I regret it now since she can't fight.” silcos voice darkened. You look down at your hand, it was true. You always need someone coming and saving you. But at the same time you didn't mind it, you liked being vulnerable. “Tell me everything,” silco said. You already heard enough, blah blah sister blah jinx.

You find yourself in Jinx's workshop going over and sitting on her couch “sevika needs to be humbled” you pick at your nail “what’d she do” jinx asked, trying not to stray from the golden boys research. Your eyes widen, telling jinx about her sister might send her into an episode so its best to wait for her to find out on her own “nothing. She's just-” you pause earning jinxs attention “she's just being cocky.” you excuse. Jinx smirked, returning to the research journal.

You lay down sideways, watching jinx work as your eyes feel heavy. 

Sevika couldn't help but have those late night thoughts about you. The way your hips moved when you walked, and honestly she loved your thigh split dresses, how when you move too fast you can see a peak or two. She could escape that one time you got cut and your cry of pain lowkey turned her on. She found her hand palming herself at night thinking of you on more than one occasion. Your voice haunted her. She's had to fight the urge to smell the jacket you forgot at the bar lots of times

But your personality, it enrages her. You argue with her all the time, it's like you get off on arguing. If she had the misfortune of having to babysit you on a mission, you fight her every step of the way. Sometimes there are peaceful moments like when you fall asleep at the bar and it's just you and her. 

Sevika knows you're stronger than you look, she's seen you pissed off before and how much damage you can do. She also knows when your pretending to be weak, but…you were a little dumb for example she will say “there's someone on your left” during a mission and she watched you look to your right, realize your mistake, check your hands, then look left and by the time you look left she's already knocked out the person coming at you 

She definitely feels bad about how young you are and you were her boss's kid. But silco didn't really care about you. I mean don't get her wrong but she notices what he talks about and she looks back on your childhood, he always focused on jinx and just left you to defend yourself. Eventually just making his goons watch you 80% of the time. She also reassured herself from how you dress and act. She swears you know what she thinks about at night and feeds her on it. 

Sevika followed vi and cait best she could before they disappeared. So she swallowed her pride and went back to silcos office “we lost them” sevika sighed “lost who?” Jinx turned in her chair, throwing the clipboard on the desk. Sevikas eyes narrowed as she walked forward, accidentally tripping a wire. She tried to cover her mouth from the grey but it took over her lungs making her pass out on the desk. 

Sevika woke up, tied to silcos chair. Still drowsy before feeling jinx's hand on her cheek, surely waking her up “i know your secret” jinx moving sevika closer “oh really?” sev asked “yes! You have a crush on y/n” she said smirking, sevika felt her cheeks flush “what gives you that idea?” she asked “oh you know the way you stare at her ass when she leaves” jinx mocked “so who did you lose?” she continued earning a sigh from sevika “you sister is alive.” sevika said watching jinx's face change

“She's just so scary” therium sat in the booth as you cleaned his face up. The bar was empty and you found therium behind the counter covered in jinx's paint. “You cant let her get to you” you say taking the damp cloth running it over his cheek “and she keeps calling me chuck, my names not chuck” therium says “i know that chu- therium” you giggle as he looks at you with a serious face “sorry it suits you” you say as jinx stormed down the stairs “y/n there's a surprised for you in dads office.” 

You look over at her as she leaves the bar “why don't you take the night shift off? Get someone to cover you” you ask therium as you walk away. He chuckles “is that a joke?” “maybe” you tease going up the stairs and into silcos office. You walk over and sit in his chair looking at his desk. You followed the arrows looking up at the ceiling to see sevika hanging from the roof, with vulgar words written on her with marker  “Holy shit.”

You helped sevika down, not without laughing of course. Watching her clean herself up on silcos couch. “So what happened?” you sat next to her “jinx is off the rails.” sevika said “no shit, i don't think she'd hang you from the ceiling for fun” you giggle crossing your arms. Sevikas eyebrows furrowed “somebody really needs to put you in your place.” she looked over at you “okay if you're gonna insult me and not tell me what pissed her off ill go find out for myself, maybe tell silco about your slip up.” you stand up, sevika rose as well, towering over you.

She grabbed you, turning you to face her “what exactly are you gonna say? That you knew something was wrong with your sister and yet still let her leave?” Sevika was right. What would you say? “I-” you found speechless. Your face scrunched up as she squeezed your wrist, she got close to your face, your noses basically touching during this stare off

You both cave at the same time, your heart skips a beat as she pulls you into her. Sevika wanted her mouth on yours for months and now she finally has it. You lean into the kiss, fluttering your eyes close as you hand cups her cheek. She lifts you up, your legs automatically wrapping around her waist. She carries you to your bedroom, throwing you on the bed. Sevika climbed onto you, settling herself between your thighs. She leaned down, forcing her tongue into your mouth.

Your spit mixed together as your hands found themselves in her hair. She kissed you like it was keeping her alive, that she would suffocate without the taste of your spit. “I have been waiting to shut you up” she held your face. “I-” you started but before you could come up with a snarky comeback she pressed her knee into your cunt “what? Speechless? Im flattered” she looked into your eyes, full of nothing but lust 

“I know you've been wanting this too.” she slid her hand up your thigh “with these dresses, and the days where you “forget” your bra” sevika smirked pulling your panties off with ease “i'm gonna treat you better than any of the pricks that you pick up at the bar” she moved off the bed and on her knees, forcing your legs on her shoulders “really? Cause there faster than this.” you spout out finally. You felt the burn of sevikas hand on your ass “do you get this wet for them?” 

Sevika licked your clit. You were already sensitive so it made you arch your back. “Sevi-” you moan. She flicked her tongue against your clit. You clenched the sheets in your fists, sevika already had you on the edge of your orgasm. She pulled away right as you were about to cum. “Wha-” you lift your head up. she was looking up at you, kissing your stomach. She was back on top of you, taking your top off. She watched how your tits bounced down after being pulled up. 

“I don't suppose a dirty slut like you has a strap?” sevika asked, you pointed to your night stand. She smirked, pulling it out and putting it on over her clothes, she moved your skirt out of the way revealing your sensitive cunt. “Whos cunt does this belong to huh?” sevika roughly grabbed your face. “Yours” you cry out. That was enough for her to push the plastic purple cock into your entrance. Giving you a second before she started at a fast pace. Your breath hitches squirming under sevika 

“Mommy” you said in a needy way. She moved her hand to your tits, squeezing one “your body's mine.” she leaned down to bite your neck, still bucking her hips into yours “are you gonna cum for mama? Cum on mamas cock” sevika growled, your body sent shock waves down to your stomach. Your body stuttering as sevika slowed down for you “that's a good girl” she whispered 

Suddenly the door opened, surprisingly neither of you heard the knocking “y/n? I heard you yelling- OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING” therium quickly closed the door “i'll come back later!” he yelled 

[episodes-ff]

Aftershock

Terry

Sitting up against the wall as I stared across at the door to our room, I waited in peril prepared to explain myself and apologize to Anaya. What I did was beyond the pail of disrespect and I want the chance to express how extremely disappointed I am in myself. Rubbing my eyes as I fought sleep for the umpteenth time to endure her wrath, I looked outside and watched the sun rising with the morning breeze. Hearing the door to the bedroom creaking open, I connected with her beautiful, red puffy eyes and watched as she and Maya exited the door. "Ny, ple-" Shoving her hand up, she angrily stormed past me into the kitchen to prepare some food for Maya as I blew a frustrated breath and shook my head. Taking a whiff of myself, I shuddered at the must entering my nose before going into the room to shower.

Finishing the much needed shower, I changed into a quick t-shirt and sweats before hurrying down to the kitchen. Halting in my steps as I spotted my mom and dad sipping their morning coffee as Anaya fed baby girl, I swallowed the major lump in my throat. "Good morning, everybody. Um, Anaya, can I speak with you for a moment?" "No need, your family is waiting on you in the living room." She spat viciously as she let out a vile chuckle and handed Maya to my dad; storming past me, she made sure to bump me hard on the way up. Knitting my brows in confusion, I glanced over to the living room to see Bree and I's son, Trey perched quietly on the couch on his tablet. "Anaya, wait!"

Running up the stairs behind her, I made it to the bedroom to see her sitting on the bed in tears. Dropping to my knees in front of her, I gently removed her hands from her face as she whined feebly trying to shove me away. "Get the fuck off of me, Terrence! You make me sick! Move!" "Please just let me explain, Naya." "Why?! Why would I want to sit here and listen to you talk about fucking this bitch and getting her pregnant? Cheating on me and disgracing our marriage? Hiding it from me for two years? Why are you trying to put me through this trauma?!" She ranted sobbing.

Lowering my head in her lap, I shook my head wrapping my arms around her waist. "There's no amount of words I can say to express how fucking sorry I am, baby." "You're not sorry, Terry. And you don't love me. This?! This isn't love, not in the slightest." "It's the worst mistake I've ever made, and I'm so ashamed that I ever hurt you like this. I know you don't want my word, but you have my actions that I will make this right." I pleaded crying as she hiccuped holding her face. "Your actions have done enough, I just need to be away from you right now, Terry. This all just hurts too much." Nodding as my heart shattered, I kissed her forehead gently before making my way back down to tend to the kids.

Anaya

After recovering my nerves and feelings, I took a relaxing enough shower and got dressed. Pulling my phone and wallet along with my purse, I slowly made my way back to the kitchen. "Oh, you look pretty dear. Where are you headed?" Miss Teresa asked as Terry looked up from holding Maya to stare at me. "Thank you, Mama. I just need to clear my head for a little while. I'll be back." "Understandable, sweetheart. Take your time." Nodding, I hugged her close before grabbing the rental keys and leaving the house. Sitting in the car for a little while as it warmed from the winter chill, I sighed before turning off my location and driving off.

Finally making it to the cemetery, I grabbed the fresh poinsettias as I trekked through to my desired spot. Making contact with her headstone, I set the plant down and thought of what to say. "Merry Christmas, Mommy. I know you would be so proud of your grandbaby right now. She's so smart and bright, reminds me a lot of you. She definitely has your personality." I smiled reminiscing on Maya's sassy side before I felt my emotions kicking in. "Mommy, please! Help me through this pain! I don't know how much more I can take. It just hurts so much." I cried thinking on all this drama. "Anaya?" Looking up, I wiped my tears as my gaze met with his. "Hi, Eric." I said addressing Terry's best friend as he smiled. "Well I'll be damned. When did y'all get into town?" "Um, we got in yesterday." "That's wassup, that's wassup! Where's my godbaby with her adorable little smile? I be seeing her here and there on FaceTime." "With her bitch ass father." I accidentally spat with venom as he looked up confused.

"You good?" He asked concerned as I nodded. "Uh, yea, my bad. It's just a lot happening right now." "Hey, it's no biggie. Everything ok with you and Tee?" "No comment right now." "My fault my fault, well I know y'all will get through whatever is going on. That man loves you to death as do you." He added making me scoff quietly. "Yea, well I'll see you around, E. I'll have him FaceTime you with Maya later so you can see her now." "That's a bet, thank you. You be safe, now." "You as well." Parting ways, I shook my head before finishing my conversation with my mom and heading to the car. Feeling a bit of hunger kick in, I groaned stopping at the store to get a light snack. I haven't even been able to hold down any food because of all this stress, and my appetite has been gone since I saw that bitch standing in the foyer with that little boy.

Shaking my head as I held back my evil thoughts, I strolled the aisles in a hurry for a snack when I ran into a hard figure. "Ohhh shit, my bad. I didn't even- Wait a minute?" The handsome voice soothed before helping me up. Dusting myself off, I looked up and smiled seeing him standing in the flesh. "Rome?" "Yeaaaaa, Anaya right?" "Yea." I blushed as he kissed my hand. "You know, I was waiting on that call but it never came. What have you been up to?" "Uhhh, well, I became a mommy and wife, and we moved to Miami." "Ahhh damn. I knew you weren't gonna stay free for long. Who's the lucky guy?" "I'm not sure if you remember Terrence." "Wait, that belligerent knucklehead from the club?" He asked as I sheepishly nodded. "Yea, going on five years married, seven in a relationship." I admitted flashing my ring. "I guess you like what you like." He casted shaking his head as I nodded. "Well, I guess that's my cue. It was nice seeing you again, beautiful." "It doesn't have to be a goodbye." I perked up reaching forward. "May I?" I asked at his shocked but smug gaze. "Go ahead." Smirking, I smoothly pulled his phone from his pocket and typed my phone number before sliding it back in his hand. "Call me sometime." "Most definitely."

****

Walking into the dark house, I set my purse on the kitchen table before reaching into the refrigerator to grab a water. "I know you're there, what the fuck do you need?" I sighed turning to face what I knew was him on the adjacent love seat. Finally flickering the lamp, he leaned forward into his lap as I watched him wiping more tears from his tired face. "Can we please just talk, Anaya? Why did you turn off your location?" "Don't worry about that. Where is Maya?" "Anaya." "Where the fuck is my child, Terrence?" Scoffing, he shook his head. "She's at the Christmas parade with my parents." "And your son?" "She came and got him before my parents left. Anaya please? Can we talk?" "I have nothing to say to you unless it pertains to my fucking child." I chuckled bitterly. "She's not just yours, Anaya." "Oh trust me, I know. Thank you for your services, soldier." I spat giving him a round of applause.

"Stop doing that." He gritted standing up. "Doing what? Acknowledging you in your truth?! We get it, Terry. It was a funky ass 'mistake' and you're oh so damn sorry. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that information, huh?! You still cheated, with Bree of all fucking people. And a fucking child is here as a result, has been for three years now." "Anaya!" "NO! You're done talking and frankly, so the fuck am I! I'm filing for separation in the morning." "WHAT?! Baby, no!" He shook walking over but I stopped him in his tracks. "Don't even. You've made it plain that I'm not your baby. We not about to sit up and continue to treat you like you're such a loving, doting husband when you obviously don't want to be one. I'm not discussing this shit anymore with you, Terry. You've crossed one too many lines, and I'll be damned if you cross me again. I'm filing in the morning and that's it, end of discussion." I clarified as he fell to his knees.

Tags: @violetmuses @theereina @kaylaahisthebestest- @mymindisneverhere @simpledopeme @believeinthefireflies95 @brisunique @madxlov3 @casualsludgeshoetoad @mauvecherie-writes @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @kumkaniudaku @geneziesm @megamindsecretlair @goldenjasssy @vivaalenaa @playgurlxoxo @ghettogirly @ranikyani @luuvprincess @perfectlyimperfectme @tbmotw @comfortzonequeen @melanin-honeyy @qdancer22 @strawberrymoon45 @luckygirlszn @kindofaintrovert @secretlifeoofmarpessa @cmbmjbfan @summwerella @ihateyallniggas @rebelrel0987 @cheracherachera @bhristpher @cocooned-butterfly @theblessedcap @deijalee @catha2003 @magik22 @sweettea-and-honeybutter @pinkbuzzlightyrrr @kimuzostar @j0joworld @justicefordeanthomas @liv10002 @withoutmusiclifewouldbflat @brattyfics @pocketsizedpanther

[fict1onallyobsessed]

Just watched act 1 and I'm actually feral for Sevika. Like omg what?! How is she so hot?! Anyway I've had this idea of sharing a smoke with her. Specially shotgunning. Um. Yeah. Anyway maybe that would turn into something a bit more - NSFW should we say. Definitely biting. You know what I'm talking about lol anyway this isn't a lot to work with I know.. I just saw your post asking for Sevika requests so I figured I'd pop in

Sevika x F!Reader 18+

Her lungs burnt as she inhaled her cigar, watching you fix her arm for the hundredth time this week. Your eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, screwdriver carefully pulling out the broken metal parts in her arm, clinking in the silence.

She could feel your frustration before she even entered your little mechanic shop. People were being more demanding for fixes as Zaun practically relied on prosthetic limbs, and you were rated the best one for the job. Sometimes you felt like a pawn; people didn't even pay that well. You might have to think of increasing the prices...

"You think too much."

You sighed, looking up at your girlfriend who huffed out smoke through her nose. She knew you were busy, and a part of her felt bad last time you stayed late to fix her arm, so she tried really hard to keep it in a manageable state for longer than usual.

Heavy on tried.

"You should learn how to fight." You snapped back playfully, looking back down at the arm for the final few fixes. The arm hissed and popped once, finally being fully functional again. "Even Ran doesn't come in this often. Might have to start charging you."

Sevika scoffed as she watched you stand up to toss your tools onto your very littered desk, your hands coming up to wipe your tired face.

"You're processor is fried. I'll make you a new one soon, but this one should hold up if you can hold off fighting for a few days."

She was listening but all she could focus on is how exhausted your eyes looked. She asked if you were done for the day, if you wanted to go home but you were already backlogged for weeks with new projects and fixes. You politely declined, walking over to her again and taking the cigar from her lips only to put it in your own mouth.

Sevika didn't flinch. It was something you did often, especially on nights where you needed something to keep you awake for a little longer.

Sevika sat on the small couch, looking up at you as you inhaled, smoke escaping your nose before you even got to exhale. She thought for a moment, then grabbed the back on your thighs and pulled you to straddle her.

"'Vika, I need to get-"

"To work. I know." She casually said, taking the cigar from your hands and inhaling deeply herself. Her eyes remained on yours while her hand reached up to grip the back of your neck, pulling you up to her lips.

For a second you thought she was going to kiss you, like she did always in thanks when you fix her up. But instead, she stopped you right before her face, hand now moving to open your mouth with her thumb. Then she exhaled.

You felt dizzy. You had smoked plenty of times, and since meeting Sevika you smoked plenty more. But this was so intoxicating it felt better than any cigarette you've ever tried.

You relaxed on her lap, sinking onto her as you tried to breathe normally. Her mechanic hand held your waist, the other firmly on your jaw to keep it open against her mouth. Just as the smoke began to fade, she pulled you fully against her, lips clashing together in a kiss.

You pulled away only when you felt you couldn't breathe, both of your chests rising and falling as you stared down at Sevika, her pupils blown wide, devouring you.

Work could wait.

You grabbed the cigar back, inhaling so deeply you felt your throat close up momentarily. Still, you leaned down and grabbed her jaw while her hands fell to your hips, gripping tightly to pull you even closer.

You exhaled the smoke as slowly as you could, relishing in the moment for a while before the smoke faded again. You wasted no time in kissing her again, a slight moan escaping your lips and into her mouth. You could taste the smoke in her mouth but it only seemed to rile you up more.

Your hips bucked, unintentionally, and you felt Sevika smirk into the kiss.

"That's all it takes to get you going?" Sevika teased. You replied with a breathy and rushed 'shut up' before going back to her lips, rocking your hips more now she was aware of your intentions. Her grip on you tightened, moving you so that you were straddling one of her thighs.

You really tried to keep your groans in, but the way your clit was grinding against the inside of your jeans. Fuck.

"Fuck. Do it again." You lifted the cigar to her lips, making her inhale it and letting her grab your jaw once more, shot gunning the smoke right into your mouth. You tried to breathe steadily, but her hand made you grind on her thigh more.

"So fucking pretty. Barely touched you and you're gonna cum already?"

You were so fucking close, a whine leaving your lips as you hid your face in the crook of her neck. She could feel the small puffs of air you breathed, trying to maintain some kind of control. Your teeth nipped at her skin, her own composure slowly failing.

You huffed when she accidentally made a sound when you bit into her neck. Your hips stuttered and bucked uncontrollably as you came, lips remaining at her skin until you were stable enough to pull away.

"That's all it takes to get you going?" You teased, mocking her words as angry red marks appeared on her neck. She was flushed and panting, your hips still held by her hands. She smirked, kissing you again before standing up and making you stand on your wobbly legs.

"Home. Now."

[cjlouwho]

Twelve Christmases

chapter tags: discussions of a burn victim (nothing graphic), discussions of suicide and mental health, very brief mentions of things that happened in past chapters (Tommy's mom, military, red handkerchief, implied noncon), anxiety, depression, background character death, Tommy calls the crisis hotline

read below or on ao3

Day 10: 2022

“I'm calling Roberts in early, you can go home.”

“Captain Marks-”

“No, Kinard! What you did out there was careless. You could've gotten yourself killed.”

“And if I'd done nothing, that man would be dead.”

“He's gonna wish he were dead if he ever wakes up! He's got third degree burns on over seventy percent of his body! I don't mean to be harsh, Tommy, but you risked your life for a dead man walking!”

“So?” 

Marks took a deep breath, sitting back in his chair. “I'm gonna pretend I didn't just hear you say that. I know emotions are high right now, but you know as well as I do I can't have a pilot that isn't concerned about whether they live or die.”

“That's not-”

“Stop talking, Kinard,” Marks warned. “You're on the ground for five shifts, I'll reevaluate things myself after that. If I have any hesitation, for even a moment, about your intentions here, you're getting a psych eval. That'll put you on the ground forever. You understand me?”

Tommy pursed his lips, nodding his head. “I understand.”

“Good. Now, go home, enjoy the rest of your Christmas, come back next shift with a clear head.”

*****

By the time Tommy got home, it was nearing ten o'clock at night. His brain was a jumbled mess. It didn't seem to matter how many times he hit the punching bag in his garage, it was never enough.

After a quick shower, he thought about laying down.

But even the idea of that made him want to crawl out of his skin.

So, he began to pace.

He paced, and paced, and paced, with his hands on his hips. From the living room, to the kitchen, down the hall, and back again.

It all felt like too much. He wasn't just thinking about today. He was thinking about his mom. He was thinking about the military. He was thinking about the red handkerchief. He was thinking about waking up in a stranger's apartment with no clue what happened the night before.

He was thinking, thinking, thinking, pacing, pacing, pacing, and he needed it all to stop.

Just stop!

So he did something he never thought he'd do.

He wasn't even sure what made him do it.

All he remembered was pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialing the number.

988.

“988 crisis lifeline, this is Penny. How can I help you today?”

He froze.

“Hello? Is anyone there?”

He swallowed. Closed his eyes.

“I'm here.”

“Oh, good. May I ask who I'm speaking with?”

“Tommy,” no attempt to try for a fake name.

“Hi, Tommy! I'm Penny. I know I said it before, but I like to make sure the people I speak to heard me. Tommy, ca-”

“I'm not... I don't wanna kill myself,” Tommy interrupted, needing to make it clear. “I just needed someone to talk to.”

“Okay.” Her voice was soothing, familiar almost. A voice that Tommy hadn't heard in years. “That's what I'm here for, Tommy. What's on your mind?”

He tried to think of what to say. Tried to figure out the perfect way to start the conversation.

He was usually so put together.

But everything felt off.

“I hate Christmas.”

He wasn't sure why that was the first thing that popped into his brain at this moment, but it was out there now.

“A lot of people have complex feelings about holidays. It can be tough sometimes, no doubt about it.”

The tiny admission seemed to open a floodgate for Tommy. “My mom was thirty-eight when she died, and I'm thirty-eight now,” he explained. He was sure the words coming out of his mouth were just as jumbled as the thoughts in his head. “And she- she didn't die around Christmas. She actually died in June, so I don't know why I keep thinking about her today of all days, but I do. Not just her; I'm thinking about a lot of things. But it all sort of leads back to her at the end, I guess.”

“Was Christmas important to her?” Penny asked.

“She loved it when I was really little. Always liked looking at the lights and taking me to the mall to pick out things I wanted. I think my dad ruined Christmas for her though.”

“He wasn't big on the holiday?”

“He wasn't big on family. Looking back, I can see how being with him changed her. I didn't recognize it back then.”

“You were young. She probably didn't want you to recognize it.”

Tommy sighed, giving himself a moment to gather his thoughts. “She didn't get thirty-nine Christmases, you know? And that doesn't really seem fair. Because I'm here for my thirty-ninth Christmas and I don't even like the damn day. She deserved more. She deserved better.”

“It's never easy to understand why the people we love get taken from us too soon. It can be especially difficult when we lose them as a child.”

Tommy let out a humorless laugh. “She didn't get taken from me,” he bit out, “she left me.”

There was a pause on the line, then, “I'm sorry?”

“Yeah, she uh, she made that choice to leave herself. Stuck me with my dad, who never really gave a crap about me in the first place, and she... she was just gone.”

“I'm sorry about that, Tommy. That's a lot to have to deal with as a kid.”

“I don't ever talk about it, about her. I don't really have anyone to talk about it with. My dad never cared for emotions, so I just plaster a smile on my face and put my shoulders back and keep going.” Tommy shook his head, clearing his throat and wiping away the tears that were pooling in his eyes. “That's not why I called though. Not because of her.”

“Okay,” Penny replied. “Tell me why you called, Tommy.”

Tommy rolled his shoulders, trying to rid himself of some of the tension running through his body. “I did something stupid at work today, and I knew better. I just didn't care.”

“Can you tell me what happened?”

“I work for the fire department. I'm a firefighter pilot, but today I was on the ground. We were called to a fire at this house- well, more like a mansion- and we thought we had the place cleared. Then the daughter started yelling for her dad. I headed back inside and found him, um,” Tommy paused, taking in a shaky breath.

“It's okay, Tommy. Take your time.”

“He- He was at the source of the fire. A fairly large space heater exploded and the fire had spread quickly. The house was about to collapse, and I was being told to get out, but I stayed. Long story short, I was able to get the man out right before the structure collapsed. He was severely burned though. If he makes it, and it's a big if, he's going to wish he hadn't. My captain won't let me fly for a while now. Sent me home early.” He let out a humorless laugh. “I wasn't even supposed to work today. I took the shift because I hate this damn holiday.”

“You've mentioned that three times now,” Penny noted.

“What?”

“How much you dislike Christmas. Tommy, do you think that maybe the risk you took today had something to do with the fact it's Christmas? Emotions were already high, making you take risks you wouldn't usually take?”

“Hm,” Tommy hummed. “Maybe? I don't really know though, because I feel like I'm ready to take those same risks any day, anytime. I said it before, and I meant it, I'm not trying to die. I just... I don't think I care if I do. It didn't matter to me if I didn't make it out. We're all gonna die someday, you know? That's what I always figure. What's it matter if it's now?”

“I think it would matter to the people who love you. The people who care about you.”

“I don't think I know anyone well enough for them to be affected by my death.”

“Well, it would matter to me,” Penny replied matter-of-factly, and Tommy couldn't help but let out a laugh.

“I dunno, I can be kind of a bitch sometimes.”

“Thank God for that, I'd hate it if you were too perfect.”

“Well, I never said I wasn't perfect. Perfect and bitch can go together, right?”

“I think it's a great pairing.”

A smile lingered on Tommy's face. He couldn't remember the last time he spoke to someone so openly. “Penny?”

“I'm here.”

“Would you stay on the phone with me until Christmas is over?”

“Honey,” she answered, Tommy softening at the name, “I can honestly say there's nowhere else I'd rather be.”

Penny stayed on the phone with him until 12:01. She was willing to stay on the line longer, but by the time Tommy had watched the clock strike midnight, he was ready to go to bed.

He felt better. A little lighter than he had in a while.

He'd been in bed for about fifteen minutes, and was just dozing off when his phone buzzed.

It was Captain Marks.

The man from the house fire died on the operating table.

I know you wanted to save him, Tommy.

Unfortunately we can't save them all.

Tommy stared at the texts for a good ten minutes before switching over to the phone app and dialing 988 again.

[feinyan]

DATING HEADCANONS featuring. damon maitsu, kai monteago, wolfgang akire, desmond hall and mark berskii.

edens garden maxxing rn :] i enjoyed chapter one a lot, so i’ll be pumping out a bit more writing of them ^^; feel free to send in requests, (even if its for different medias) though i already have 3-4 drafts ill be dishing out eventually.

damon, who treats you like you’re a fragile little doll, prepared for you to break at any moment. hence, why he worries for you so much. though he attempts (and fails) to play it off as a casual concern. ‘are you hurt? bleeding?’ ‘what? no? i just tripped, damon.’ ‘are you sure? let me check just incase. come on, stop moving.’ damon, who always has a limb around you. his hands? wrapped around your waist, or intertwined within your own. his legs? always pressed up against yours. if you point it out, he gets flustered and denies it, pulling away. but you’ll still find his eyes constantly lingering on you, as if he hasn’t felt your contact in months and needed it desperately. damon, who is a tease, yet gets flustered just as easily. sarcastic, teasing remarks always escaping his lips, smirking as if he didn’t have a care in the world. though the minute you retort back with a comment of your own, he's completely quiet. blushing and muttering embarrassed insults under his breath. damon, who doesn’t quite understand standards when it comes to dating. holding a door open for you? walking close to the road? wearing a hair tie on his wrist incase you’d needed one? a foreign concept to him. but regardless, upon hearing things told to him by other people whilst rambling like kai, he tries his best to adapt to it. things that would normally be unusual for him, he attempts because he wants the best for you. damon, who is stingy and a bother about little trinkets you point out. ‘do you really need that?’ ‘that looks stupid.’ ‘its so small. why is it expensive?’ yet of course, they’d somehow end up within your residence. somehow. obviously, it were damon. damon, who spoils you with acts of services. openly doing things he’d refuse to or need convincing for from others, going out of his way to do things for you without being asked, etc. sure, maybe once in awhile he’ll knock on your head and call you an idiot for not being able to do something yourself, but it’s just teasing. he truly doesn’t mind providing for you, or helping you. anything that offers spending time with you is worth it for him.

kai, who couldn’t get enough of you. your touch, your attention, your words, you name it, he likes it. his hands are constantly all over you, any opportunity he’s given. he melts within your touch, in his most vulnerable state, unable to resist anything when it comes from you and your grasp. kai, who spoils you with anything he can offer — cute endearing nicknames, gifts he’d found that he thought you’d like, or even little snacks he thought looked silly that you two could try together. he loves to see your expression light up when he offers you some item he’d found that he thought you’d enjoy. even if you don’t end up liking it, the idea of him being reminded of you or thinking of you enough to make the purchase still leaves you feeling warm. kai, who whiningly calls you princess whenever he needs something from you. aside from his casual nicknames that he adores, like sweetheart or baby, whenever princess leaves his lips, you know he wants something from you. kai, who is admittedly quite insecure. he’s scared he’ll be abandoned by you, just like he’d been left by so many others who viewed him differently due to the persona he puts on online. but because of this, it just means he cherishes what you give him more than anything. he wants you to be able to touch those negative emotions inside of him, and see what really lies within his heart, not what he puts on the internet or around others.

wolfgang, who leaves encouraging little sticky notes around your desk when spending time away from you. reminders to take care of yourself, reminders that he loves you and wishes he were with you, etc. wolfgang, who gently takes care of you whenever given the opportunity. brushing your hair in the morning, making you coffee, assisting you in filling out paperwork, you name it. despite being such a busy man, he works hard to make sure he’s around for you. wolfgang, who despite appearing so cool headed, is such a jealous boy. the type to watch you talk to someone from behind and give them a disgustingly stern glare, but the moment you turn to face him, hes smiling sweetly in your direction. the type to wrap his arms around you and get all close and mushy in order to scare off someone else eyeing you. wolfgang, who invites you out on the sweetest dates ever. picnics under the warm, dimly lit night sky, only the stars witnessing the two of you giggling away and laying together. or, a romantic date at a a fancy restaurant, where the two of you dress elegantly, yet he can’t take his eyes off of you. his mind too caught onto the gorgeous attire tight against your body, too lost in how gorgeous you look whilst speaking to him. wolfgang, who spoils you with luxurious items. anything you want? you’ll get it. he doesn’t mind what you wear, whether or not you like cute or cheap things. what does matter though, is if you want something. and if you want something, you’ll get it.

desmond, who is so smooth with his words, you could die. the way he speaks to you in such a soft and caring tone. the way he goes along willingly with whatever you say, because admittedly, what makes you happy makes him happy. the way he speaks about you in such an endearing way to others. others may be embarrassed when speaking of or sharing about someone they love, but desmond expresses the way he feels for you without hesitation. desmond, who teaches you little quirks about his ultimate. little things that could be useful for protecting you, or just things he finds neat and wants to share with you. desmond, who is perfect for a clumsy you. about to trip? hes already grabbed you, hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you back up onto your feet. about to spill something? hes grabbed the glass, preventing it. his quick reflexes are almost scary.

mark, who loves to kiss a certain part of you. your hands, your nose, silly yet specific places which just make him feel warm. mark, who gets embarrassed about the way he thinks about you. who will be listening to you rambling like usual, yet turn his head out of no where, muttering to himself like a flustered mess. mark, who has an attitude which is no joke. it doesn’t come off as a surprise, but the way he rolls his eyes and grumbles makes it much easier to decipher when he’s displeased or irritated. but to him, you’re a soft spot which can always manage to cheer him up. your silence yet presence close to his serves as a type of battery for him. mark, who is constantly sharing songs that he likes to you. new songs hes found that remind him of you, a song hes been listening to a lot recently, or even just songs hes worked on. he wants you to enjoy what he does.

@ feinyan

[jhyoos]

Dreams Come True

Chapter 1: Breaking The Ice

modern au! hockey star! vi x idol! reader

inspo: @shouyuus

summary : reader, a weary trainee chasing fading dreams the more she is held back from debuting, finds their worlds colliding with vi, a rising star on a college hockey team. but as vi’s successes shine brighter and their paths diverge, the weight of mismatched futures becomes unbearable. vi “takes it upon herself” to end their relationship.

warnings: cocky!vi (only for this chapter), modern au!, little of college au!, and lots of angst for this chapter.

notes: im still editing this! but please enjoy!

The mirrored walls of the practice room reflected every imperfect detail—the smudge of sweat on your forehead, the slight tremor in your legs as you held your final pose, and the hollow look in your eyes you tried to ignore. The beat of the music faded, leaving only the sound of your labored breathing and the dull ache in your muscles.

“Again,” your dance instructor said, clapping their hands sharply. No sympathy, no reprieve. Just endless push to perfection.

You wiped your brow with the back of your hand, your eyes darting to the clock. It was late.

Vi’s hockey game had probably ended hours ago, but you hadn’t checked your phone. You couldn’t afford distraction. Not now.

As the music restarted, you pushed yourself through the choreography, your movements robotic, devoid of the passion you once had. You stumbled on a turn, your ankle wobbling slightly, and your dance instructor’s glare could cut through the mirror she was staring at you through.

“Focus or you’ll never make it.”

The words stung, but they weren’t untrue. You bit your lip, swallowing the lump in your throat. You couldn’t afford falter. Not when the dream you had chased for years was so close, yet so far out of reach.

When practice ended, you sank onto the floor, your back against the cold wall. Your chest heaved, and your hands trembled as you reached for your phone.

No new messages

You stared at the blank screen for a moment longer than you should have. It wasn’t like Vi to go silent, but maybe that was just another sign of how things were unraveling.

With a shaky breath, you typed out a message: “Hey are you okay? Haven’t heard from you. I miss you.”

Your finger hovered over the send button, but before you could press it, a voice interrupted your thoughts.

“You’re still here?”

You looked up to see one of your fellow trainees, Mel, already in a coat and standing by the door.

“Yeah, just…catching my breath,” you lied.

Mel bid her farewells to you and left without saying another word, the sound of the door clicking shut leaving her alone in the room.

You sent the message before you could overthink it and stood, grabbing your bag. The night outside was cold, and you already feel the soreness settling into your body. But what hurt more was the absence of Vi—the one person who had always been your escape from the endless cycle of training and exhaustion.

You needed her.

The rink was silent, the cold biting at her skin as she stepped inside. Vi was on the ice, skating back and forth in a sharp, aggressive movements, her stick slamming the puck against the boards with a hollow thud. It wasn’t practice—it was something else, something restless and angry.

“Vi,” you called softly, standing at the edge of the rink. Your voice echoed, but Vi didn’t stop. She kept skating, kept hitting the puck as if trying to drown out the sound of her name.

Finally, the reader stepped closer, her sneakers crushing against frost. “Vi stop.”

With a frustrated groan, Vi came to a halt, her skates screeching against the ice. She turned to face you, her expression hard, almost unrecognizable. “What are you doing here?”

“I came because you didn’t answer me. Again,” you said, crossing your arms against the cold. “You’ve been avoiding me lately and I wanna know why…I deserve to know why.”

Vi leaned her stick against the boards, running a hand through her hair “I’ve been busy.”

“Busy?” You repeated, your voice rising. “You’ve think that’s an excuse? I’ve stayed up with you until three in the morning when you couldn’t sleep because of a bad game. I’ve massaged your shoulders after every practice when you were too sore to move. I’ve made sure you ate when you forgot, Vi. But now you’re too ‘busy’ to answer my text?”

Vi’s jaw tightened, her eyes flickering with something unreadable. “I’ve never asked you to do any of that.”

The words hit you like a slap. You couldn’t help but let out of a chuckle, stunned. “What?”

“I’ve never asked you to stay up, or to take care of me, or drop everything for me,” Vi says coldly. “That was your choice.”

Your chest tightened, anger and hurt bubbling to the surface. “My choice? You didn’t seem to mind when I was helping you through every breakdown, every bad practice, every injury. But now that things are hard for me, you can’t be bothered to check in?”

Vi’s gaze hardened, and she stepped off the ice, her skates crunching against the rubber mats. “This isn’t about you. It’s about us. And us doesn’t work…”

“Why?” You demanded, your voice trembling. “Because I’m not as successful as you yet? Because I’m not shining as bright as your hockey career?”

“Because we are on different paths,” Vi snapped, her tone sharp. “You’re barely holding it together, and I can’t be the one to carry you through it.”

Your eyes filled with tears, but you refused to let them fall. “Carry me? I’ve done nothing but support you, Vi. Every step of the way. And you want to act like I’m the one that’s dragging you down?”

Vi shrugged, her face mask of indifference. “Maybe you are.”

The words cut deeper than any slap or any ache that you felt on your body. “You don’t mean that,” you whispered.

“Don’t I?” Vi said, her voice devoid of emotion. “This is exhausting. You are exhausting. And I think it’s better if both of us stop pretending this will work.”

Your breath hitched, your hands shaking. “I loved you,” you say quietly, the words trembling with pain. “I gave you everything, and this is what I get in return?”

Vi didn’t reply, her silence colder than the air around them.

You scoffed “Cool.”

With that, you turned and walked away, your footsteps echoing in the empty rink. Behind her, Vi stayed silent, unmoving as if she’d decided already there was nothing left to fight for.

The outside cold stung your face, but it wasn’t nearly as sharp as the ache in your chest.

The morning was quiet, but not in a peaceful way. You had to skip your classes after an emergency meeting at your company. All of the trainees were scattered throughout the room, discussing amongst each other.

You sat in the corner of the studio, your knees drawn to your chest. Your phone buzzed on the floor beside you but you didn’t bother picking it up. You already knew it wasn’t Vi.

You hadn’t slept much, not that it was new. But this time, it wasn’t the pressure of training or fear of failing—it was the look on Vi’s face, the cold finality of her words

“I never asked you to do anything of that”

You repeated those words in your head so many times it felt like they’d been etched into you. Each time they came back, they stung a little less, leaving behind a dull, empty ache.

“Hey”

You looked up to see one of your close friends, Mel standing over you with a water bottle in her hands and her usual casual smirk softened into something more thoughtful. “You look like hell…”

You let out a humorless laugh “Thanks…that’s exactly what I needed to hear.”

Mel sat down beside you, sliding the water bottle into your lap. “Drink that. You’ll feel less like death.”

You took it without arguing, twisting it off the cap and taking a sip. Mel leaned back on her hands, watching her movement before speaking again “Let me guess, Vi?”

You froze, your fingers tightening around the water bottle. You didn’t answer, but the silence was enough.

“I saw her before I left this morning,” Mel said her voice careful. “She looked like hell too. I mean, hides it well, but you can tell when you’ve been around her enough.”

“Good,” you muttered, staring down at the water bottle. “She should feel like hell after what she said.”

Mel let out a low whistle “Shit girl…”

The instructor walked into the room, silence falling instantly. He scanned the group, a stern look on his face. “Alright,” he said, his voice cutting through the tension. “We’ve seen what you’re all capable of. Today, we’re announcing the new members of the upcoming girl group AURORA. Listen carefully.”

Your heart raced as you sat up straighter , trying to calm the pounding of your chest. You’ve been training under this company for over 3 years now. You just knew your time would soon come.

The instructor called out a 3 girls names. None of them were yours and honestly you were starting to lose hope.

“Mel Merdarda.”

Mel’s name was called, and the room filled with automatic claps and cheers. You turned to your friend with a wide grin, though she noticed a flash of concern in your eyes when Mel caught your gaze.

Who were you gonna talk shit with now?

And then the instructor paused, scanning the room once more. There was a slight hesitation before he said the words that would change everything.

“(Y/N) (L/N)”

Your chest tightened. You barely registered the sound of applause as you stood frozen for a beat longer than you should have. Your name.

You had finally made it. 

[letsyapthenightaway]

The Hockey Boys when you are sick!

Matt Rempe: Panics for a second but knows what to do. Would miss practice to take care of you, or have someone close to you check in. He said he likes crackers, so I'm going to say he knows exactly which ones are going to help with your tummy. It gives me the vibe that he will blow on the soup and then feed it to you; he would steal some from you. Laughs when you scold him about him being able to get sick from sharing the same spoon. Would be so soft! like bundle you up in a blanket and keep you either on the couch or bed. Steals kisses, not worried about getting sick.

Luke Hughes: Panicked! His girl is sick, and he knows how to handle it a little, but because he is nervous, he doesn't do it the best at first. Rushes around the apartment trying to find the medicine, make soup, and call his mom asking for advice. He would nervously watch you try the soup; it doesn't matter if he made it, if it was from a can, or if it was from a shop. He wants to make sure you like it and are comfortable. Always check in on you and ask if you are okay, like 20 times in 10 minutes. Watches you with soft eyes; you can tell poor bud wants a smooch, but he knows you will say no. Smiles so bright when you are feeling better and finally give him one. He won't fully get sick after taking care of you, but he would get some sniffles.

Jack Hughes- He is sick with you; you probably got sick because of him. So both of you are just in bed feeling bad; if you do not cuddle him, he is whining. Would talk your ear off even if he has a sore throat. Your nausea causes him to get nausea. Very chaotic, but will feel bad and try his best to take care of you even if you tell him to rest. At first, it's pouting the day away, but then it's snuggles and old comforting movies. Would worry a little about hockey but sees this as him getting to spend time with his girl even if they both aren't at their best.

Quinn Hughes takes care of you and doesn't get sick while doing so. Is so reasurring that you shouldn't be embarrassed for having sniffles, nausea, or whatever. Honestly, I might enjoy you being sick a little too much. I like to claim that you are at least a little to a lot more chaotic than Quinn. So the apartment is very much calmer than usual. He would feed you soup and, just to add a little joke, would do the airplane thing at least once. Worries like crazy if you get a sudden fever. You know how you watch a baby to make sure they are breathing out of paranoia? He does that to you once that fever hits.

Connar Bedard- I love Connor, but he would NOT want to get sick. Loves and takes care of you from a distance. I'm going to put the soup at the door. Do you think you can grab it? Feels bad, but he cannot be out of his game! The moment he sneezes or gets a sniffle, he is feeding you both medicine. He really does wish for cuddles, and it tempted him! His girl is sick and wants to be there for her, and he will...from that distance. If he does get sick, he will try to play it cool, sick? Don't know him. Until he is being forced by you, who is already healthy again or still sick, to lay down and rest. At least now he doesn't need to fight the urge to cuddle. Will 100% whine and complain about missing practice or games.

[pskmonika]

I saw the post you made abt MHA boys’ type and thought it was so cute and accurate (at least how I envision it too) I loved your vision for Shinsos s/o and was wondering if you had any hcs about his type/what he finds attractive? I love this purple haired boy sm you have no idea

-🫐

Shisou's type / him having a crush:

Because of shinsou's calm personality, a lot assume that he'd be into someone who's more outgoing and extroverted that makes him get out of his shell, but i dont think thats true

trying to think of it in a canon way, shinsou is sooo similar to aizawa and we saw that aizawa had no feelings towards the bubbly girl that like him, so thats why i think similar to him, thats simply not shinsou's type

Shinsou wouldn’t fall for someone who blends into the crowd—he needs someone who sees the world differently, someone extraordinary in their own quiet way, shinsou doesn’t crave noise; he craves depth.

well at first You was quite, that all there was in you , that all everyone saw, but shinsou unlike everyone else, pays attention to the smallest details, like the way u loved to draw whenever u got free time, like the way u chase cats outside and always leave a piece of cheese or tuna in ur backpack just in case u found hungry stray cats, or the way u loved to come to class earlier than everyone just to listen to ur fav songs while staring out the window, u loved the sky, he for sure knew that, from the way u stare at it, the way u drew it

maybe it was drawing, writing, making music or even photography.... but you certainly was someone artistic, someone that sees beauty in things, someone that doesnt just look around the world, someone that sees the world, someone that holds so much inside

You were fascinating, just like your quirk: Nightmare. It brought your enemies’ greatest fears to life, turning them into a reality you controlled, it was scary, it made him wonder if people thought you have quite the vaillin quirk, just like they thought about him,

But unlike him, you was quiet but never unkind, and he was curious

So he got closer, started from borrowing a pen, to a random chat in the rooftop to being partners for a school project, and the more time he spent with you, the more, he’s sinking, deeper and deeper, into you.

you made him feel at ease, you were like a gentle breeze on a warm day, he felt like with you he can breath

He loves that no one knows you like he does, Your laughter, your secrets, your vulnerabilities—they belong to him. He’s possessive, and he knows it. its no secret how insecure he is, so knowing that he got to see sides of you that no one else sees, hear a laugh that no else hears, making inside jokes with you, hearing your secrets and discovering all the diff sides of you, it all make him feel so special

But the moment he sees you with someone else, it feels like his insecurities explode, the jealousy start consuming him like gasoline igniting on an open flame, and when the wild fire consumes him, it all came bursting out his chest, as a messy unexpected confessing and a sudden passionate kiss

N.B: i hope u enjoyed this! I always try to keep the character's true personality and stay canon and make the s/o kind of special, so sorry if this wasnt exactly what u wanted! Everyone feel free to request any other characters! This is the previous post and sorry for any grammar mistakes, if u got any other thoughts on shinsou's type comment it down below! Id love to hear your thoughts

[funhouse-mirror-barbie]

Alright I gotta talk about this one too.

I already went over the changes made from the storyboards of Octavia’s song, I Will Be Okay, to the show proper. Well, there were also storyboards of Octavia’s confrontation with Stolas at the palace.

I made the mistake of not crediting the storyboard artist in my first post—the sequence I’ll be taking about was boarded by Sophia Magallanes Morales, a phenomenal artist who also did I Will Be Okay’s storyboards.

I wanted to talk about Sophia’s storyboards for when Octavia goes no contact with Stolas because they are, in my opinion, leagues better than what was in the actual episode. I think a LOT was lost from the decision to cut parts of her storyboards, and to go over it, because I really think it’s shame.

We can actually see this change in quality within the first few seconds of the final scene in the show as opposed to the boards:

Right after the fight, Stolas runs to Via. He quickly catches up to her as she walks away, and tells her how proud he is of her and pulls her into a hug. We can tell Stolas is concerned about her and eager to get back in touch.

Now let’s look at Sophia’s boards (comparison continues below)

This scene has so, so much more tension and emotional weight to it. We see exactly how desperate Stolas is to get in contact with Octavia, how in this moment he needs to catch up with her, how urgently he needs to let her know how proud he is and how much he loves her.

He runs so fast that he almost stumbles and falls, so fast that once he does finally catch up to her he has to stop for a moment to catch his breath.

And then he pulls her into a tight hug and we actually get to see his joy at reconnecting with her. We see how proud he is of her. He’s so proud that he has a hard time expressing it first, staring with “I—“ and then just starts over telling her how brave she’s been.

These boards also give us Octavia’s reactions. We see her after the fight staring solemnly in her father’s direction, before she slowly turns away. She doesn’t react to Stolas calling out to her, ignoring him. Once Stolas finally catches her though, she turns back to him slowly, and we can see in her reaction that she is definitely dealing with a lot of feelings.

Sophia is excellent at conveying complex emotions through characters expressions. To me, Octavia expression shows her hurt at Stolas’ neglect, her disbelief that he actually came after her, her confusion as to why he suddenly acting like he cares about her now, her fear that he’ll lie to her again. I think it shows us SO MUCH about what she’s feeling in just a few frames, and that is amazing.

Compared to the final episode, I get so much more information about what Stolas and Octavia are feeling in this moment! The boards show their perspectives on what’s just happened, it shows their current states of mind given the events of the episode!

The direction and movement of the boards are also fantastic, I can tell that Octavia feels forlorn and is tired and done with waiting for Stolas to care about her. I can tell that Stolas is prioritizing Octavia above all else in this moment, that he may regret how long it’s taken him to get to her, how overjoyed and relieved he is to hug her again.

Of course these are only MY interpretations, but regardless there is so much more expression and emotional tension in the boards, as opposed to the final episode where Stolas catches up to Octavia quickly and immediately hugs her while saying he’s proud of her.

In both versions this scene is only a few seconds, but the boards just have so much more depth and in my opinion make for a much, much more impactful scene.

I have NO idea why they chose to cut these storyboards so the way they did. The only reasons that make sense to me would be due to time and budget, and if so it really sucks that we had to lose such a powerful scene.

I think I’ll be making more posts comparing this scene’s storyboards to the final episode because Spindlehorse cut so much of Sophia’s boards, and it not only makes me sad, but also makes me wonder what other emotionally engaging Helluva Boss scenes we’ve lost.

It’s just a real shame.

Again, I’m not saying the final animated episode looks bad. The animation is still stellar! The animators did a great job! I just think it’s a waste to have cut so much out of these scenes.

[kikyoupdates]

Made to Destroy ⭑˚💎⭑ 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑜𝑢𝑡𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑙𝑑

bnha x op!reader

op!reader, my hero academia x fem!reader, reverse harem, over powered reader, f!reader

You are the product of a series of twisted experiments, an anomaly that shouldn’t have ever existed in the first place. Thankfully, you are taken into the arms of a hero and given a new purpose in life. But as you soon discover, it isn’t easy to deny your true nature, especially when you were made to destroy.

prologue | story masterlist | next

I don’t know where I’m going.  

You’ve been walking for a while now, with no real destination in mind. Truthfully, you’re not searching for anyplace in particular. You just figure that anywhere will be better than being stuck with that crazy old man.  

So, you walk. The building you’ve just come out of is rather secluded, tucked away behind a canopy of trees. There’s no one else as far as the eye can see, so you make the journey in total silence, instead focusing on the sweet-tasting air, and the little birds that flit from branch to branch.  

The minutes trickle on, turning to hours, and you find yourself weighed down by a heavy feeling that must be fatigue.  

But it’s okay. Because it seems like you’ve just reached the city.  

Here, you are no longer alone. It’s crowded and busy, and there are tons of people roaming about. You can’t help but blink in awe. Up until now, the only person you’ve met was Dr. Garaki. You never imagined that there would be so many others besides him.  

Curious, you take a step forward. 

Only to be immediately pulled back.  

“Be careful!” a woman cries out, and something speeds past you at that very moment, just narrowly missing your body. You frown and look back at the woman in confusion. For some reason, she’s gasping for breath and her shoulders are trembling. “You almost walked right in front of that car,” she says shakily. “Seriously, you need to look both ways before crossing. The pedestrian light wasn’t even on.”  

You’re not really sure what she’s talking about, but you nod nonetheless. 

“Okay,” you reply. “Thank you.”  

She lets go of your arm, then looks you over for quite a long time. Something about your appearance must not sit right with her, because her brow is now furrowed.  

“Is everything okay—”  

“Hey, what’s the hold up?” someone else interjects. It’s a man, and he loops his arm around the woman’s. “Come on, I’m in a hurry here. I need to get back to work soon.”  

“Oh. This girl was about to wander out into the street, so I got worried about her,” she explains.  

“Yeah? Well, she’s fine now, so let’s go. Like I said, I don’t have time for this.”  

The woman is jerked along without another word, but you can see her glancing back over her shoulder every few moments, a look of concern plastered across her face.  

Eventually, she disappears through the crowd, so you shrug and carry on walking.  

A lot of people seem to be giving you funny looks. You don’t notice them at first, but eventually, you realize that you’re drawing a lot of attention to yourself. You’re not really sure why, though.  

More importantly, so much of this is new to you. Not only are there tons of people, but there are countless buildings, in all colors and sizes, as well as other strange things you’ve never seen before. The world outside appears to be vibrant and bright, already a massive improvement to the dingy lab you awoke in.  

You keep walking. Some people look like they want to call out to you, or at the very least, they’re thinking about it, but ultimately, they reconsider and let you carry on your way.  

Everyone disregards the fact that you’re a child all on your own and assumes that someone else will come to your rescue eventually. That’s the reasoning they use to spare themselves the hassle and wipe their hands of any responsibility.  

And then, someone does come to your rescue.  

“Hello there, little girl. Are you by yourself?”  

It’s a tall man with a warm, inviting smile. He fixes you in a tender gaze, and unlike everyone else, he takes the time to find out how you’re doing.  

You nod in agreement. “Yes. I’m alone.”  

For some reason, the man’s smile grows even wider. Unfortunately, you’re too naïve to realize why.  

“Well, that just won’t do,” he hums. “It’s not safe for a kid like you to be all alone on the streets. How about I help you out? I can get you something to eat too. You sound like you’re hungry.”  

Hungry? You’re not too familiar with the term, but perhaps he’s referring to how your stomach is grumbling without pause. It’s an uncomfortable feeling, one that you’d been trying to disregard up until now. But if this man says he can help with that, you’ll gladly take him up on his offer.  

“I think I am hungry,” you concede. “I want to try eating something.”  

“Of course,” he grins. “Just follow me.”  

So, you do. It doesn’t occur to you that perhaps you shouldn’t trust people so blindly, especially given the experience you’ve already had with Dr. Garaki. But as you will soon discover, the outside world is plenty dangerous too, and your total ignorance makes you all the more vulnerable to it.  

The man reaches over to grab your hand in his, and he seems tickled pink by the fact that you don’t try to refuse.  

For a while, the two of you walk like that, hand-in-hand. You keep looking around the whole time, trying to make sense of your surroundings, and eventually, you see something that makes your eyes widen.  

“There,” you say, pointing towards a building. You can see through its glass windows, and the people inside are all sitting at tables and shoveling various things into their mouth. They’re... eating, right? They must be. Your brain instinctively makes the connection, and right on cue, your stomach starts grumbling even more.  

“What is it?” the man frowns.  

“They’re eating food,” you say. “In there. Can we go in to eat too? I’m hungry.”  

“Ah. I actually don’t have a lot of money on hand,” he sighs. “But I’ve got a nice meal waiting for us back home. I can get you more comfortable clothes to change into as well. Don’t worry. It’ll be way better than sitting in a cramped diner.”  

You tilt your head to the side, confused. “But they’re all eating, and I want to eat too. I don’t feel like waiting any longer. I want to go there.”  

“Like I said, I don’t have money,” he explains.  

“Money?”  

Yet another term you’ve never heard before. There’s a lot that you don’t understand, that you still need to learn. Of course, the man can’t possibly know that, so he must assume you’re just playing dumb. 

“Everyone else is eating, so why can’t we do it too?” you ask.  

He clicks his tongue, and his smile drops for the very first time. “Don’t be difficult,” he grimaces. You notice that his grip on your hand has become tighter. “I promise I’ll give you some food at home, so please just listen to me, okay?”  

Despite his insistence, you stubbornly root your feet into the ground. There’s food right on the other side of that window, and you’re not going anywhere until you’ve tried some for yourself.  

“I want to go in there,” you say again. “I’m not leaving.”  

It seems like that’s really not what the man wanted to hear, because all of a sudden, anger flashes through his eyes, and he pulls you forcefully, making you stumble forward in bewilderment.  

Then, he throws you over his shoulder.  

“I played nice and gave you a chance,” he glares. “All you had to do was not act out like a little brat.”  

He’s running now, still gripping you tight and refusing to let go. All you can do is gape, watching as the diner fades further and further into the distance. You lament the loss of your food, which now appears to be hopelessly out of reach. The hunger is getting worse by the second, too. It feels like your stomach is about to implode.  

You know what you have to do. You need to fight this guy off and break free of him. But much to your dismay, you can’t muster up the strength, no matter how hard you try. That feeling from before, when you channeled all that energy... it’s gone. And you’re not quite sure how to bring it back.  

“I want food,” you groan, feeling weaker by the second. The man pays you no mind, of course. He keeps running as fast as his feet will carry him. You wonder where he’s taking you. Wherever it is, you doubt it’s anywhere good. It seems like Dr. Garaki isn’t the only crazy bastard in this world.  

So, you escaped. Only to be captured by yet another maniac. 

And to think that this is only your first day of living.  

“It’s going to be okay,” the man reassures, laughing in a shaky, deranged manner. “You’ll see. The two of us... we’ll be happy together. I’ll take care of you and give you everything you want.”  

“...is that so? And here I was, thinking that you’d kidnapped the poor girl.”  

Another man’s voice. It’s deep, but soft, and it catches you completely by surprise, since you were convinced that no one else was anywhere near you.  

The man who kidnapped you cries out, but it’s too late. Something tough and sturdy wraps around his body and immobilizes him, and in the next moment, your feet are resting comfortably on the ground, right where they ought to be.  

You look up at your savior, who has pale skin, long disheveled black hair, and a lethargic yet stern expression.  

His name is Aizawa Shouta, and he will change the course of your life forever.  

“I’ll never understand what goes through the minds of sickos like you,” Aizawa mutters. 

“I-I wasn’t doing anything wrong!” the other man frantically protests. He’s bound by some weird kind of cloth, and it’s safe to say that he isn’t going anywhere. “We were just enjoying a nice day out, and she was getting a bit rowdy, that’s all. I was bringing her home so that she could calm down! Isn’t that right?” 

He looks over at you expectantly, perhaps hoping that you’ll help him get out of this sticky situation. 

But just because you’re more ignorant than the average person doesn’t mean you’re stupid.  

It's obvious that he’s a bad guy, just like Dr. Garaki.  

“I only met you a few minutes ago,” you say. “And you promised me food but got angry when I wanted to go inside one of the buildings. You grabbed me and forced me to go with you, even though I didn’t want to.”  

Aizawa narrows his eyes, and the man chuckles nervously in response. “Sh-She’s always such a joker. Come on, don’t be that way. You’re going to get your old man in trouble.”  

“Nice try,” Aizawa comments insincerely. “But I’m afraid there’s only one place for creeps like you.”  

The man wails out in protest yet again, but all his pleas fall on deaf ears. It looks like he’s in a lot of trouble. You’re not sure where he’s being sent to, but it probably isn’t someplace nice.  

Aizawa grips onto the cloths tightly, but finally spares you a proper glance. “More importantly, are you okay, kid? That must’ve given you a fright. Everything’s fine now. You’re safe.”  

You frown. Can you really trust him? It’s only been a few hours since you’ve awoken, but so far, your experience with people has been disappointing to say the least. You’re starting to realize that you have to be more on guard. There’s no telling what someone will do next.  

“Who are you?” you ask. “What if you try to hurt me, too?”  

Aizawa smiles sympathetically. “Yes, I understand why you might feel that way. But I promise I’m different from this dirtbag. I’m a hero. Protecting people is what I do. That much, I can promise you.”  

A hero. For some reason, the word evokes a strong feeling.  

Kill heroes. Kill heroes. Kill heroes.  

You wince. That voice in the back of your head is acting up again, making you feel all jumbled up and icky inside. It’s the same voice that was commanding you to obey Dr. Garaki. The voice that you instinctively know you can’t trust.  

But much like before, you manage to fight against it. You shove it to the back of your mind and disregard what it has to say.  

The man in front of you says he’s a hero, and apparently, heroes are supposed to help people. It’s possible that he’s lying. It’s possible that you’re being set up for disappointment again.  

But you decide to give him a chance. 

“I’m Aizawa,” he introduces.  

“I’m [Name],” you say. Even if Dr. Garaki was the one to give you this name, it’s yours now, and you are determined to cherish it. 

Aizawa nods, offers you a small smile, then reaches out to you.  

You take his hand. 

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