#I have a bottle opener

[lastoneout]

catch me googling "how to partake in the butch tradition of having a lanyard/ring of keys clipped to your belt when you don't have a job or a car and so most of the things on your lanyard are just decorative keychains"

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

No time to play. You are being sent away.

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[fairweathermyth]

BLACK DOVES 1.01 ⌁ To Love Then

[st-hedge]

Made a deep and introspective 2 part comic strip about aging and turning 27 at the end of this month

[bylerain]

"I want to live Mike."

"You will. You're living right now, and you will keep living after all this is over."

"No Mike. I want to live and enjoy it, not survive and pretend to be okay with it. Because I haven't been okay with it for 5 years. This isn't living."

[mothsintherain]

headcanon/au where once jon starts reading ANYTHING, not just statements, he can't stop. when jon and martin arrive Somewhere Else, it doesn't go away. on roadtrips, jon has to let martin drive and not look outside too much or end up reading every road sign around them out loud. if he picks up a book, martin has to forcibly close it and take it from him to prevent him from reading the whole thing in one sitting. he gets a text from martin in the middle of work and sneaks a look at it, forgetting himself for a second. "i miss you baby crying face emoji heart emoji" he says in a deadpan voice to the customer waiting at his desk.

[defiledtomb]

HATE that tumblr (that used to be the last bastion of true anonymity for me) has become infiltrated by my x. I never even told him about by username. But he was a mod in the ol ouro discord. But how??? Fuck!! And now that I really want to post about all the things I don't bother anyone else with. UGH. But who cares, no? Let him fume, right? It's not like I can just change username because it's really easy to find if you just follow me. And why do I care? It's just eating at me. Tune in next time on Lou Looses It A Little.

Anyway. What I wanted to tell u. My neighbor is a really hot divorced guy. LMAO

[calamitys-child]

The service dog battle vest was kinda just cause I thought it was funny and cheeky and vaguely suggestive and I genuinely wasn't expecting people to actually clock it and start approaching me for like. Support going up the stairs or help picking something up or directions to their bus stop or whatever but it seems to be happening noticeably more frequently when I wear this than when I wear my other weird jackets. Genuinely very funny and charming to me. The people have spoken and they want a service butch

[wearecrowley]

*casually sharing a bottle of wine with your bestie*

[wiisagi-maiingan]

Hi if you struggle with opening containers (jars, bottles, etc) because of poor grip strength or w/e, there's lid opener tools that range from fancy electronic ones to super cheap and basic ones and they can be an absolute game changer. I have one that looks like an angry can opener and now I can actually open bottles on my own without wanting to break down crying from the pain.

[schattengesang]

so i ordered something...

giggling and kicking my feet rn i stole his bottle opener >:)

(jk i found it on ebay!!)

[infectiouspiss]

can u give us ranch review if yall try the ranch ?

AMERICANS WHAT DO I DIP IN MY RANCH I NEED TO MAKE SURE IM TRYING IT PROPERLY

[cent-scratchnsniff]

to smile. to rejoice. to celebrate

[skyloftian-nutcase]

Y’all, I never have a weekend off from work, what am I supposed to do with myself, what is all this free time, I already assembled a dog crate, cleaned the house, rearranged the living room, visited my folks, and I’m just sitting here.

Does anyone want to talk blorbos or AUs?

[opbackgrounds]

I appreciate Oda giving the most stereotypical pirate laugh to a musician when a lot of its fame is rooted in a famous piratey song

[fitzselfships]

Sometimes you just need to cry while your partner holds you <3

Proshippers/adjacent dni. 100000 shark attack 🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈 also Zooble self ship doubles dni