#I have Energy that I Need to dedicate to SOMETHING but I can't figure out what so I'm just vibrating really aggressively and pacing kfvshf

[keeps-ache]

need to be exploding something but i Can't for some reason. just Can Not. my ability to do is just. Nay

[gotta-winwin]

OT13 Reaction -- the aha moment

or...how they realize they're in love with you

seungcheol doesn't get that aha moment, falling in love isn't something that happens within seconds for him. it's like he's slowly drifting into love, not even realizing you've become the focal point of his entire existence. when it finally hits him, it's a quiet, simple moment. he's watching you make him breakfast in the morning, admiring you quietly from the kitchen counter. he zones out for a moment, blinking suddenly and realizing damn. that's my woman. and he knows he's ruined for life.

it's kind of silly, how jeonghan realizes he's in love with you. he's just returned home from a busy day at work, entering the house to find it empty. searching the place top to bottom, he's about to call you when - BOO - you jump out from one of the closets and scares the soul out of him. he's clutching his chest, watching as you collapse onto the ground in a fit of giggles. he can't help but laugh along, realizing through the chaos that he's found his soulmate, and he'd be damned not to admit he's in love with you.

joshua's a simple man by nature. he's easily happy in life, only needing his members, his job, his lifestyle, and of course, you. it doesn't take long into your relationship before he realizes he's in love, as the two of you take a stroll along the Han River after a long day. he's watching the setting sun reflect against your figure, taking his phone out to snap a few pictures. it's when he notices his camera roll is full of pictures of you does he think well, that's it. i'm in love.

upon meeting his family, jun notices how much work you've put into it. you're doing your best to speak his town's dialect, communicating with his parents in a language that made them most comfortable. his heart swells when he sees you amidst his childhood home, trading stories and eating with the people who raised him. it's when he notes that you look so perfect here that he realizes you just fit. he's in love.

as if everything else is with soonyoung, his aha moment is full of fireworks and pizzazz. having just finished the most record breaking performance of his life, he finds himself with one thought only: i want to go home. usually, it's because he's tired. but now, ever since you stumbled into his life, he finds himself wanting, needing, to go home so he can hold you and recite everything that happened today. he's practically thrumming with energy to rush home, and everyone around him sees what is so painfully obvious. he's so in love.

wonwoo's always credited himself to be a loner. not a lot of people can fit with his quiet personality, so when you offer the idea of "parallel play" he's a little confused. his heart warms when you explain that you don't mind doing separate things as long as you're in the same area, understanding that he needs more time to himself than others might. it's when you tell him you love him enough to compromise does he think im so in love with this girl right now.

woozi's used to writing songs dedicated to his fans and members. he sits down for another writing session, brainstorming ideas and the thought of you pops into his mind. he shrugs, thinking it might be nice to mix it up a bit, sitting down to write something about you. it's when he reads his own words back does he realize he's irrevocably screwed and so in love with you. thought about settling down, buying her a house and saying screw the music. yeah, he's in love.

having always been a realist, minghao doesn't necessary believe in true love, or love at first sight. he understands there's going to be someone out there for him, but he's skeptical that that someone is going to be perfect. all his beliefs go out the window the moment he sees you - it's like you're surrounded by a golden glow - and he realizes maybe love at first sight can be real.

seokmin loves and gives as easy as breathing. he's always been a generous guy, and it's when you sit him down and kindly remind him to leave some for himself does he stare at you and realize ok i've found the one. you've become that steadiness in his life that used to be just his members, and you love and give to him like it's as simple as breathing too.

having always been the resident cook, mingyu's eyeing your food creation like it's some kind of poison or drug. he had insisted you didn't need to cook for him, he's always been the cook and doesn't mind it, but you were stubborn and he relented. it's when the first bite blows him away does he realize he kinda misses having someone cook for him too. if you're this good at cooking i might just have to marry you, he says, ignoring how you blush, going back for another bite.

seungkwan's always been the entertainer. he doesn't mind it, he enjoys the fact it's his job to make everyone laugh. but when times get tough and he's in no mood to be the entertainer, you're right there to support him. it's when he gets home to you after a particularly rough day and you welcome him in with open arms, murmuring how he's done well and doesn't need to do more. it's when he realizes he can just be seungkwan - not seungkwan the entertainer, but just seungkwan - and he loves you for that.

vernon never really thought about finding the one. he always just assumed that they would find him. and that's exactly what happens, when you bump into each other at the movie theatre - both there alone just cause. it's when you're enthusiastically going band for band with vernon about movies that he's forced with the realization that shit. maybe i have found the one.

chan's always known he was in love with you. he doesn't like to admit it cause he thinks it makes him sound sappy, but he truly never questioned his love for you. it was a simple thing in his mind - this person makes me so fucking happy - i must be in love. and how could it not be simple for him? he's staring at you quipping about some joke to his friends and he's thinking i love you. he's watching you just wake up from a nap and he's thinking i love you. he sees a text from you on his phone mid-dance practice. i love you. he's always been in love with you because he loves everything to do with you.

[kujakumai]

On the subject of being good with children, which characters do you think WOULD be good babysitters?

YUGIOH CHARACTERS AS BABYSITTERS, RANKED

TOP PICKS:

Seto Kaiba runs an entire company dedicated exclusively to safely entertaining children, and unless his parks are getting continually sued I believe he knows how. Your kindergartner is not only safe with him but will probably leave knowing how to play chess and write in C++. He may allow them to play with knives, but only if they're 9 or over, plus he has all the emergency numbers on speed-dial.

Hiroto Honda babysits his niblings on the regular. Can warm a bottle and change a diaper. A level-headed and practical guy. He’ll be fine as long as his friends don't drag him into a horrible game-themed deathtrap. Don't ask why that caveat exists.

Rishid Ishtar is safe, experienced, has dad energy, however he will crumple like wet paper at the first sign of conflict re: ice cream for dinner / no bedtime / blood-soaked cross-country quest for revenge / an extra episode of cartoons over the screentime limit.

Ishizu Ishtar would make a great babysitter. I don't really have a quirky joke here she just would.

"MAYBE"S

Jonouchi used to watch his little sister and I think he'll do about as well as any other teenager you're paying minimum wage, and with a lot of earnest enthusiasm. Your child will be fine at the end of the night, though they will probably have eaten some junk food and played a T rated videogame.

I do not think Atem would know what to do with a baby, and may panic about it, though if you have an older child he will be happy to offer a rousing speech and some deep-voiced mentorlike advice while teaching them to play board games. Not a bad choice, just try not to leave him with anyone under seven.

Yugi knows zilch about kids and often appears a little annoyed by them. Same general rules as Atem--do not leave him with a baby, but he'll probably just teach an older kid to play shogi or something.

Mai Kujaku will put the kid in front of the television and order pizza while she paints her nails. Honestly, though, what more are you paying her for?

Listen, I love Anzu. I do. She’s smart, driven, and big-hearted, but she is also sort of short-tempered and impatient, and patience is like 90% of child-rearing. Please do not ask Anzu Mazaki to watch your children. She WILL say yes because she needs the money, and she WILL go into it with optimism and gumption, and yes, both she and your child will both be in one piece at the end of the night, but it will be clear from both of their frazzled expressions that she lost most of her sanity an hour in after the fifth "Why?"

DEFINITELY NOT

Ryou Bakura would in theory be a perfectly good, if kind of spacey, babysitter, but you cannot trust him to remain Ryou Bakura, and the other guy is definitely not someone you want anywhere near your children.

I don't think Marik Ishtar has ever interacted with a child for very long and the number of people he talks to that are even his own age is in the single digits. And he is definitely not getting spat on or dealing with any bathroom stuff. I'm not saying he can't figure it out but the learning curve is going to be steep.

I have to put Yami Bakura here in principle and yet for some reason I think it wouldn't go that bad? I mean he definitely doesn't care about the safety of your child. And he may enlist them to the armies of darkness. And he's not cleaning anything up. But he's like, a weird socially awkward over-the-top guy? And children love those? Honestly I think they would both have fun. For at least an hour until everything goes horribly wrong.

Please do not summon Zork Necrophades to babysit your child.

[procyonloser]

Lute checked her stun baton, grinning to herself as it crackled with energy. Adam had his hands in his pockets, uncertain what they were headed towards in the depths of the facility, leagues under the surface of the ocean. He'd not been called in by Biosyn for months, and last time he'd only been asked to look at some skeletal remains. Nothing this secretive, being flown out into the middle of the Pacific, to a base no one knew existed.

In his late teens, working his ass out in the field in Hell Creek, Adam had never dreamed he'd ever get the chance to work with actual living dinosaurs - until Biosyn first contacted him, and the pay was right. Sure, they didn't have the best reputation, but Adam had kids, alimony to pay. A few tourists getting eaten was unremarkable to him. The fall out after, was slightly more of an issue, but that's what private security like Lute was for. She took great joy in killing the things Adam had once dedicated his life studies to.

"What do you think they're hiding out here?" Adam mused, as the lift descended, lights flashing past, level after level in the dark of the ocean night. "Something they don't want getting out to land, I'm guessing."

"Even a T-Rex bleeds," Lute shrugged a shoulder, but her gaze was sharp. "It's probably some new monstrosity, you know this lab is just for fucking around with God's creation."

"God can't see shit down here." Adam answered, before the elevator stopped and the doors slid open. The floor they'd been left on was a buzz with activity, scientists and geneticists moving back and forth in front of screens and displays. In the center sat a massive glass tank, and a single small figure in the middle of it.

"Adam, you're here. Good. We need all the help we can get." A voice called out, beckoning him over. Sera, a tall woman that he'd once mistaken for some kind of crunchy granola hippie type, but she'd been anything but. She ran this section of Biosyn like a warden, no room for mistakes. No one even glanced at him, they knew there was no time for pleasantries, not when the big boss was around, hawkish over their shoulders.

But Adam wasn't looking at them either, his gaze was still on the figure in glass, mind racing at a million miles an hour. It had features he'd expect for a typical theropod, but just about everything else was wrong. Three pairs of wings were held tightly to it's back, but they were large enough to suggest flight was possible. It was mostly white, with scales covering part of the body.

The body, the body was the sticking point. It looked like a hominid, upright, with down feathers giving the appearance of hair on the head. I held Adam's gaze with large red and gold intelligent eyes.

"What did you do?" Adam breathed out, getting Lutes attention. Adam looked past a lot in life, if it made his life easier or better, then oh well. He'd stepped over the remains of dead bodies in the old Biosyn lab, after an escaped arcocanthosaur devastated the floor, he'd taken money literally stained in blood, he didn't care how many politicians he saw on the books of Biosyn.

The horror on his face said enough.

"We've... made something new. A new evolution of our assets." The dinosaurs, she meant, but Sera never really saw them as real things.

"There's no actual Homo sapien genes in it, which is remarkable, isn't it? Look at him." Sera asked, walking in closer to the glass, and it clearly followed her. "Good morning, Lucifer. Would you like to meet our guest? He's going to be working with you for the foreseeable future." Sera told the thing, Lucifer she'd called it. That sounded about right to Adam.

What he wasn't expecting, was for Lucifer to stand up until he was fully upright, stretching his wings out before bringing them back in closer to his bare body. Adam glanced downward, finding a line of visible femoral pores followed by a slit on the creature, combined with a slight bulge that implied it had at least one hidden hemipene, but likely two.

"Adam," it said, and Adam's eyes snapped back up, shocked. It spoke?

And by the look of the teeth, it wasn't an herbivore.

What the fuck had they made

[beelmons]

Just want Luke Alvez to spell out his name with his tongue against me. I'm a simple woman, with simple needs. No hands, all mouth. my cunnilingus king

no cause this is what i call having taste !

i accidentally posted this without finishing and im going insane trying to speed write it skckwkckwkf DOMT LOOK UNDER READ MORE

Edit: Okay NOW you can look.

cw: oral sex fem receiving, fem!reader

Some people paid billions of dollars to reach space and experience the wonders of the universe, and yet, it only took a heavily underpaid FBI agent to get you to see stars.

Luke Alvez was not a man to eat women out, oh no, he was the one to straight up devour them. Like an avid critic ready to cater his next meal, he would time and again bury himself in between your legs; no further aid needed whatsoever, a dedicated mouth could take you to places you were sure mortals couldn't reach.

It made you suspicious, to be honest. How could a man be so good at pleasing a woman? The only way it made sense was if he had done it hundreds of times before, but taking his time while in deployment and current new schedule in consideration, he wouldn't only have to be dedicated to it, he would have had to straight up clone himself to take two women at a time on the little time he had to spare.

He could do it, to be fair, without the need of cloning himself, after all he had his charm. You don't just open your legs for anyone on the first date, let alone the first thirty minutes of meeting them. He was a witty gentleman, and not hard on the eye at all.

Soon you would find out that his sharp tongue wasn't only skillful on the streets. Something about the way he so passionately licked you thoroughly each time. Or how he moaned along everytime he hit a good spot. Or the weird combination of strokes he pulled at the end, the one that never failed to push you over the edge.

You had to find out what it was, because you were starting to think it was not human. And tonight, as your apartment was filled with lewd slurping sounds, you were set on finding it out.

One little problem, keeping your sanity as his tongue, somehow, reached your sweetest spots was no easy task. It took all of your energy and some holding back from straight up cumming into his mouth without warning. Your face was clenched in what seemed more like pain than pleasure. But your climax was reaching, you were so close, just as close as you were to figuring out what the hell he did at the end, so close, so close.

"Babe, are you alright?" he pulled away to ask.

"No!" you yelled in anger almost instinctively, and certainly without intention.

He was clearly taken aback by your reaction, and the second you noticed his clear confusion, you spoke up again.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." you said, reaching to have your hand land on his hair, not wanting him to be too far from your cunt "I was just so close."

"Sorry, you looked like you were in pain, so..." he tried to explain before you cut him off.

"I was focused." you clarified.

"Focused?" his brows furrowed "Listen, if you have to focus to cum... I'd rather you tell me what I'm doing wrong."

"No. What? Come on Luke, you can't be serious." you complained "I was focused on figuring out what the hell it is that you always do, that it makes my brain be reduced to a pulp!"

You certainly didn't mean it as a praise, but he still found a way to interpret it as such. He broke into a shy chuckle as he shook his head.

"I can tell you" he said "But you have to promise not to laugh."

"Why would I-" you were about to inquire, but he cut you off.

"I spell my name with my tongue." he finally admitted.

"You are kidding." your eyes opened in genuine surprise. It sounded so stupid right off the bat, even more so when you considered the possibility of being true.

Your free hand reached down to have your middle digit trail over your own clit, you were moist enough thanks to him, so nothing else was needed. You began making an experiment of your own.

L U K E A L-

Sure, it felt good, but nothing out of the ordinary.

"Not like that!" he quickly grabbed at your wrist to pull it away "It's not the same if you use fingers, and I'm afraid there is one more secret to it."

You were attentively looking at him talk, so you were able to see his face disappear between your legs. You thought after the break you wouldn't be so sensitive, but boy were you wrong. The second the tip of his tongue landed on your bundle of nerves again, your legs began to shake. Like no time had passed.

You tried your best to pay attention, you really did.

Luke Alvez

But you lost track after the 'K'.

Next thing you knew, you were dripping down in your own release, and he was doing his best to have nothing go to waste.

Your chest was raising up and down from the pants. Legs limb and tired against his shoulders. Once he was satisfied with the clean up, he raised his head yet again. His characteristic, slightly annoying, cheeky grin clear on his face.

"I do it in cursive."

[wannaeatramyeon]

Hi, I would like to ask for a story / script about kabe-dong with the guys from Lookism (Seo is desirable, but you can make it to your taste)

God I love your work so much 😗❤️‍🔥

(Sorry for my English, I don't really speak it and I do everything through a translator)

Anon! Please don't apologise for your English, and through a translator?? Dedicated! Thank you for teaching me something new! I had to google this, and I didn't realise there's a name for this move. It might just be my greatest weakness ughhhhh.

Lookism x Reader: Kabedon with Samuel, Gun, Johan, Goo, Jake

+ HTF: Taehoon, Seongjun

Very different scenarios for each one. Daniel and Zack giving you a taster of what kabedon is 👇

You feel a tug on your wrist, whirling you around until your back slams against the wall, all air knocked out of your lungs.

"Oof!"

A hand lands onto the wall next to your head, and a solid body stands in front of you. Trapped.

.

.

Samuel Seo

Your eyes widen in surprise at his forwardness. This had been strictly off-limits according to him. Absolutely no funny business at work Samuel had warned.

"Samuel?"

You can see your own look of surprise reflected in his glasses as he smirks.

His free hand lands on your waist, caressing down to your hips before winding its way around to grope at your ass.

A very undignified squeak slips out.

"I couldn't resist," Samuel chuckles against your neck, leaving feathery kisses.

"Samuel... we... shouldn't!" You force out between gasps, though you make no move to stop him.

"I know," he says, pressing the full length of his body to yours. "Tell me to stop."

You blush furiously when you meet his eyes.

"Tell me to stop," he repeats again.

"...N-no." You stammer, and that's all the invitation he needs.

.

.

Gun Park

"Do I scare you?" Gun taunts, face inches from yours, smirk on his lips and victory within reach. He has you cornered and he knows it.

You give him a toothy grin, teeth stained with blood and tell him no. And that's the truth. This game of cat and mouse makes you feel alive.

He arches a brow, "Only an idiot would have no fear in their final moments."

You notice his hand against the wall trembling almost imperceptibly, the pose half for show, half needing the support to hold himself upright. His other arm hangs limp by his side, having lost use of it after your first strike. His left eye already beginning to swell and bruise. The crimson pouring from the slash on his stomach, your scratches on his chest, his split lip.

You want to see him drown in his own blood.

"Gun Park," your fingers walk their way up his ripped shirt until you reach his neck. "You can kill me but you would miss me."

Gun's curiousity is piqued, not being able to figure out your next move.

With a vicious yank of his collar, you smash his lips to yours.

.

.

Johan Seong

"Johan?! What are you doing here?"

At your words, all energy seems to leave Johan. He removes his hand and looks at you as if he doesn't know why he's here neither.

"Johan?" You ask, brows knitted in concern why your boyfriend would turn up at your school.

"I... " he starts, but can't bring himself to say the next words. He turns his head, averting your gaze.

"Is everything ok?"

Johan murmurs something under his breath that you can't catch.

"What?"

"Imissedyou" rushes out in a jumble. And then you notice the flush, from his hairline all the way down to his collar.

"Oh." This boy. Seriously. Can he get any cuter.

You tell him so and that's what causes his prickliness to return.

"I'm not cute," he scowls.

"Sure you're not," your words are insincere but Johan is placated, defences crumbling, when you reach up on your toes and kiss him.

.

.

Goo Kim

Goo blinks owlishly at you as you just continue to stare.

You expect him to do something, but he just stands stock still, not having planned this far ahead.

"Ok... Now what?" you ask.

"I dunno," A shrug. "Just thought it looked hot in animes. That was hot, right?"

You nod. Although you find almost everything Goo does pretty hot, which you would never tell him because his ego does not need any more inflating.

"Hmm," he taps his chin with his other hand for a moment as he thinks.

A devious glint in his eyes and smarmy grin appears.

"Wanna kiss?"

And unfortunately, you find that pretty hot too.

Goo knows he has you wrapped around his finger. You give another nod.

.

.

Jake Kim

"Fancy meeting you here," he purrs and the urge to roll your eyes doesn't come because with Jake, the line works.

Your thoughts fizzle and on auto-pilot, you move your lips to his. Just wanting a quick taste. Just for a moment... Before you snap to your sense.

"Jake!" you scold, face pinched, "You're interrupting!"

"Hmm? I thought someone was bothering you."

You glare at him, unswayed by his handsome grin.

"Sorry, sorry, where are my manners..." Smoothing his hair back, Jake turns and directs his charm to your classmate.

A rather cute and popular boy. Apparently. You didn't see it though. But everytime you mentioned him in front of your boyfriend, talking about your time spent together, him helping you out after school, Jake's jealousy would flare up. There's been a few times you haven't been able to walk properly for days after.

(So what if you occasionally use this to your advantage.)

Reaching out for a handshake, "Jake Kim. Y/N's boyfriend."

Jake at full force really is something to behold. He smiles and even throws a wink at your friend.

You see his magnetism take hold in real time.

Like something out of a k-drama, time slows down and a luminance radiates from Jake. The other boy gasps, taking in his tall stature, eyes running down his body hungrily and cheeks flushing.

His hand inches slowly towards Jake's. When they finally meet, an unexpected gust of wind literally sweeps your friend off his feet and straight into Jake's arms.

"N-nice to meet you," he stammers, now beet red, staring at Jake with stars in his eyes and making no effort to move. Who knew such solid and muscular arms could be so comfortable?

Third wheeling in the background, you loudly scoff at the scene unfolding.

.

.

Seong Taehoon

"Get your stinkin' feet away from me!"

Your efforts to free yourself and push his leg away from the wall is futile. Taehoon unruffled and unmoving, watches with his hand in his pockets.

"Those are Korea's legs you're manhandling,"

"Hmph."

"You still mad?"

Evidently.

Taehoon clicks in tongue in exasperation, "Cmon, stop being an idiot."

"..."

"How is it my fault that I'm this hot."

"..."

"Why am I being blamed for those girls flirting with me?"

"..."

"I didn't do anything!"

"..."

"You should be happy you're with someone so handsome-"

You hand shoots out, having heard enough and wanting to clamp his stupid mouth shut.

Taehoon easily intercepts and holds it steady in his. Damn this guy and his lightning reflexes.

"Don't be like that," he brings your hand up to his lips and kisses your knuckles. "I'm yours, you dumbass."

.

.

Baek Seongjun

"You're here." Seongjun holds your chin with his other hand, thumb gliding along your lower lip.

"What can I say, I'm a big fan."

A very sticky situation for you if this got out: the producer should never mess around with the talent.

But what can you say, Seongjoon's appearance on your show led to the ratings hitting an all time-high. After one too many celebratory drinks with him and your team, lines quickly becoming blurred, you both discreetly bid everyone goodbye and ended up at his home.

"You're going to regret this." Seongjoon murmurs in your ears, shifting his weight, hands now working quickly to unbutton your pants.

The speed of your movement matches his as you almost tear his shirt open. "I already do."

[ambrosiagourmet]

Dunmeshi characterization mumblings…

Laios tries. That’s the guiding principle of his characterization, to me. He tries more than he realizes. He thought he gave up during his years with the military but he never did. Something dragged him to Falin, after all.

He cares about people a lot and he wants to do well by them. This is usually specific people but also can be groups (eg the orcs or the residents of the Golden Kingdom). His hit rate on noticing what people like/want/need is not anywhere close to 100% but once he has locked something in he’s Locked It In.

He wants to be better than he is, and he isn’t always good at noticing what he does do well. Some part of him does want to run away, and he’s not always great at accepting that. He clashes with it, and doesn’t even always know whether he’s winning against it (framing his past of leaving Falin as running away when it wasn’t necessarily that simple). When he does self-reflect he can have a pretty dismal view of himself, and he prefers to act instead. This leads him to help as often as it leads him to step on toes, but it does very much do both. He’s working on getting better about this by post-canon though - on some level I think he’s aware that it’s not how he always wants to be.

He supports people by Physically Being There. Lots of worried dog laying their head on your lap energy. Voted most likely to stay by someone’s bedside until they wake up.

~

Marcille is still figuring out where she fits in the world. She's still figuring out who she wants to be. She can be extremely confident about some things, and completely doubt herself in other areas. She's got a little bit of fake-it-til-you-make-it charm. She DOES know what she's talking about, she just doesn't always know how to apply it. Very #gradstudentcore. She's still only just starting to explore the world beyond the safety of her parents or her school!

She has such a big heart and she emotes loudly, every time. That doesn't mean that she shows EVERYTHING she's feeling, but if she does show it, she shows it big. She loves romance and big gestures and the zest of life and people. She likes to meddle and snoop because she wants to know the whole story and wants to be in on it all. I think sometimes she might have trouble realizing that she's PART of the story, though. Like, she views her meddling gossip seeking as neutral or good acts, when they can affect people more than she realizes, and sometimes even hurt them.

In general she's not great at predicting the repercussions for her actions. I do think she reflects on herself, but sometimes she's trying to learn and do so much that some things get lost. She wants to be better, and she's always learning and growing and taking things in. I genuinely think that someday Marcille is going to be a little more sure of herself and a little more experience and she is going to be an AMAZING woman. She's just not always good at handling the fact that she can't just be THERE already.

She supports people by cheering them on. The force of Marcille Believing In You could give someone the power to move mountains. Yes, she does also fret and fuss over people in ways that can undermine that. But like the Marcille smile and "you got this" encouragement? Literally confers The Power Of Love.

~

Kabru... Kabru is building the future he wants to see. He's not very good at putting that work down, though (I know, workaholic Kabru characterization, deeply insightful). He can be prone to seeing himself more a part of the process of creating a better world, though, rather than a person who deserves to live in that world. Like, I think he'd be more likely to daydream about a statue or plaque dedicated to him than about himself actually just hanging out and being content.

He thinks about everything. I definitely don't think he's always manipulating people, but he is almost always observing. And since he's prone to following those observations to plans and ideas, he's not being great at turning off his Planning brain, and thus measures his words and actions even when he maybe... shouldn't be....

I don't think he'd describe himself as an "ends justify the means" person (he's very opposed to that way of handling things from the Canaries), but he is rather more concerned about the ends than the means. Bit of a hypocrite there, maybe? I do think his ends are kinder and more inclusive than the Canaries, though. So maybe it's something where he believes that if one has good enough ends, the means must be worth it. Especially since he directs the cost of those means at himself as much as possible. He views himself as expendable in pursuit of a worthy goal.

He is getting better about that but I don't know that he's consciously acknowledged that it's a problem. And so he's probably prone to relapse into those self-minimizing behaviors, especially given he very much has a new Goal to focus on with the kingdom.

Honestly, Kabru doesn't really self-reflect nearly as much as he might think he does. This is actually taking me a little by surprise as well. But he reacts more from emotions than logic in a few points in the story (esp the part where he stops Mithrun from killing Falin), and doesn't really... acknowledge that?

Maybe it's more accurate to say that he's kind of hit or miss with it. He is learning and growing all the time. But he's also something of a blind spot in his own excellent understanding of what makes people tick. Maybe he's better at understanding himself through the reflection of how other people see him.

He shows his support by making other people's lives easier. That might mean giving them a friendly ear, helping them navigate a tricky situation, or assuaging worries they didn't even realize that had. This isn't always true, but I think sometimes he might like some his support to be a little invisible. I don't think he has a problem with receiving praise and gratitude, but I also don't know that it does much for him, either. And being able to help without being noticed can help him hide the vulnerability of the depth of his attachment.

Also, Kabru would probably be more emotionally destroyed by one person helping him with something than a hundred people praising him for his help (but would claim he prefers to help and be appreciated for it).

[writingquestionsanswered]

How come I managed to get an outline done for once for the sole purpose of getting me to finish a chapter but I just can't get myself to finish that chapter?

Chapter Outlined, Can't Write Chapter

It happens. Outlines go only so far... you still have to flesh out the scenes as you write them... figure out the dialogue and the blocking. It's sort of like you can plot your trip route on Google Maps, but you still have to actually drive from one point to the other.

So... when you have an outline but are still struggling to actually write:

Problem #1 - You Don't Have a Way In

Having a chapter outline usually just means you know what generally (and importantly) needs to happen in the scene, the general order those things need to happen in, and some things like the scene's purpose, your character's goal, etc. But this is sort of like having a set of instructions that say, "Go to building. Go inside." Okay, great... but how are you specifically getting inside? Are you going through the front door? The back door? Climbing through a window? Landing on the roof in a helicopter? Tunneling in through a basement wall? So, before you can actually start writing, you need to figure out the specific way you're getting your character into the scene. A good way to do this is to go to the first important thing that has to happen in the scene, then rewind from there. What is your character doing in the moments before that? What has to happen in order to put them into that place in that moment? Is there anything unique about the circumstances or location you can focus on? Try opening up some of the books on your shelves and look at the ways different chapters begin. It will start to give you ideas for how you can open your chapter.

Problem #2 - Not Inspired/Excited

Having your chapter outlined doesn’t mean is a good first step, but if you're not feeling motivated to actually write the chapter, it will harder to write it. Try doing some fun exercises to get yourself excited about the chapter. Do a mood board or playlist for the chapter. Save some character and setting inspiration photos on Pinterest. Do an interview with your character that takes place after the scene/chapter to get their take on what happened and what they feel about it.

Problem #3 - Something Isn’t Working

Stories are like a house of cards in that one misplaced “card” can bring the whole thing crashing down. Sometimes you lose interest because an earlier element or event didn’t quite work. You can feel in your gut that something’s not right, so your brain interprets that as losing motivation. It’s not really that you’ve lost interest in the story… it’s that you’ve lost interest in the dead end path it’s on. Go back to the previous chapter or two and look for something that’s not pulling its weight. It could be an unnecessary character dragging the story down, a subplot that is cluttering up the story or drawing attention away from the main plot, or a scene/scenes that don’t add to the story. It could even be a combination of these things. If you can find it and fix it, your motivation may return.

Problem #4 - You’re Distracted by Other Things

If you sit down to write and you’re busy scrolling through facebook, texting with friends, and singing to the radio, you’re probably not going to get much done. Try blocking out thirty minutes (or whatever amount of time you can afford) and dedicate it entirely to writing. Shut down social media and other tempting apps/sites. Turn off the TV. Put your phone on silent. Tell housemates not to bother you. Put on soft music without lyrics, and focus solely on writing. If you find your mind starting to wander toward other things, yank it back and focus on your story.

Problem #5 - You’re Lacking the Physical/Mental Energy to Write

Whether you’re sick, not getting enough sleep, super busy, depressed, or in a bad mood, not having physical or mental energy can make it hard to write. Do what you can to bring your energy up as much as possible, both physically and mentally, and you may have an easier time writing that chapter.

I hope something here will work for you!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

LEARN MORE about WQA

SEE MY ask policies

VISIT MY Master List of Top Posts

COFFEE & COMMISSIONS ko-fi.com/wqa

[lola-theshowgrl]

"Star-Crossed Blades" - Writing Update #2

Month: January Stage: First draft Word Count: 7785 Currently Listening To: Ep 3 of "Monty Don's British Gardens" Beverage: Chai latte Mood: Anxious

It's going well! In the past week I've written the prologue, chapter one, and about half of chapter two. I've got almost the whole novel plotted out, which is very strange for me (I'm usually much more of a "pantser" than this!) and I even have the two main characters' voices very strongly in my mind. I've been bombarding close friends with all my little thoughts and ideas, and, at the risk of sounding immodest, I really think I have something here. I really do.

There are two problems I'm facing right now. The first is that with such a clear story in my head, practically screaming in my ear to get out into the world, I simply can't write quickly enough. I'm not a very fast writer in general, truth be told. I enjoy writing - I'm not one of these people who complains about the act unless I'm burnt out or dealing with an awkward scene. Generally speaking, I love doing this and actually writing is just as much fun as sharing the finished result. Still, I wish I could be quicker this time around, or at least I wish I didn't need a day job so I could spend the bulk of my energy on SCB instead of data entry and wearing a bra.

The second problem I'm dealing with, is that I'm coming fresh from the fandom space. I'm used to posting chapters as I finish them, and having people to talk to about characters and plot developments. That sense of community is very difficult to do without, especially when I'm practically boiling over to talk about what I'm doing.

I'm part of a few servers on Discord, and I'm trying to spread my excitement across them so I'm not being a huge bore by talking constantly about my WIP. It's difficult, though! I'm so torn between wanting to sit on it, to keep it all secret so I can get people's reactions when the whole thing is finished, or to just blurt it all out like a fog horn to anyone who will listen.

I've been going backwards and forwards about finding a platform I can post it chapter by chapter, as I have no plans to traditionally publish or go via KDP, but with the rise of plagiarism and pirating and AI scraping, I just don't think that's the best idea right now. There's Patreon, but I don't know how I feel about that, either.

It's a shame, really. If nothing else, all I ever want for my writing is for it to be read. At the moment I have a lovely, small but dedicated little group of people who are interested in my scribbles, and I worry that they'll have lost interest before I'm ready to share the whole, finished thing.

I'm in the unusual position of having a good idea how long this story will be, and it's going to take me a while to finish, I imagine. I can't see it'll be ready this year, and right now I'm aiming for September 2026 - that's a very long way off!

For now, I suppose I can only keep chugging along, and reminding myself how much I love this part of the journey. The rest I'll figure out as it comes!

[m4rried2the-moon]

( PICK A PIC ) ❤️‍🔥 — what about you can best aid the revolution?

Funds for Palestinians 🇵🇸🍉

Relief / Other funds 🫶🏾💖

- what about you can help demonstrate your passion for humanity ? ❤️‍🔥🐦‍🔥

woke up angry opening my phone 🙃(understandably so) and figured that you might be too ! so, here is a reading to highlight qualities about you that could aid in the current revolution . it can be difficult to navigate the trauma of what's happening and shock you into stillness but this reading will hopefully give you a good idea of where to start if you've been in a cycle of guilt and deep empathy . that being said, please listen carefully to your intuition and only take what resonates <3

pile one 🍉

- qualities you have : the sun, strength/justice

- how to use it : the fool (seven of coins), the moon (the high priestess + the tower)

your radiance and brilliance overpowers false truths, injustice. pile one, you have a strength that comes from a forever knowledge of what is and isn't right. this is a deeply humanitarian energy, like a public defense attorney. very "for the rights of the people" and it's about controlling and directing that passion.

you can put this to use by continuing to hold out hope for a better future for this. i see that you have been wanting to start a project of some sorry to contribute to palestine and other causes---keep it up! don't let doubts of nothing coming out of your dedication and commitment stop you from figuring for what's close to your heart. if you know you must do something then do it! any effort is effort. use this drive for justice to inform and inspire others with your radiance.

pile two 🍉

- qualities you have : ace of cups, the magician

- how to use it : two of pentacles, two of wands

you possess a deep and unbridled sense of positive emotional well-being as a strong quality, pile two. your internal atmosphere being as sensitive as it is also marks for powerful manifesting energy. you are well aware of the gift you possess and not even need to be reading this (/j). you are in touch with your spirituality in a way that basically makes you an alchemist of desired outcomes. This also may happen naturally/with minimal intent.

you can put this spiritual sensitivity and connection to the divine to use by expanding your energy into different projects. this may sound overwhelming to some but i can also see this pile as people who are already planning their outreach and discussing with friends/family, boycotting and sharing new info. would say continue to stay encouraged! think about the progress that we've made so far for palestinians and how this will result in a nearly global release! we're so close, do not accept defeat as an option and keep your head up.

pile three 🍉

- qualities you have : three of wands, knight of wands

- how to use it : the empress, ace of wands

ready for action and a planner. your dominant qualities are that of a leader, and it's nothing for you to assess and judge a situation that calls for action. i'm sure you've already been putting your for down in the face of neutrality when it comes to palestine and other causes. you are not easily swayed by fears of the collective and hindering beliefs.

the best way you can use these leader qualities to aid those who can't and themselves is continuing to let your voice be heard and trusting that your effort is working in the best interest of those who need it most. It's clear in your pull that you are taking every chance you can already to stand up for what you believe in---yes! so happy and proud, keep it up! I would say you are already aware you're doing everything you can.

hey guys ! i hope this helped truly & just wanted to say that i know it's hard to see so much anguish and pain on such a global scale but the moment we give into ignoring it, we become a part of the problem. if you've been doing your best to share and inform at least, that's enough. do to the best of your abilities and don't beat yourself up if you're circumstances are limiting to your outreach ❤️🤓👍🏾 okay that's it. love u guys bye

[jpitha]

Between the Black and Grey 64

First / Previous / Next

Fen tried to lean forward to get a better view of what Han'iel was doing, but she was still strapped tightly to the table. She tried to speak, but her mouth was still covered.

"Nothing you need to worry yourself about, Empress - or rather, former Empress" Han'iel said. Fen could hear him tapping on a pad just out of sight. In fact, here-" He loosened the cover over her mouth. "You can't hurt me now, so you may speak if you wish."

"Former Empress?"

"Yes, the beacons I linked out announced your abdication as well as an announcement of the K'laxi's independence, and a call to arms to resist the human empire's tyranny."

No. He's lying.

"Han'iel... what is your plan?"

He stuck his head around the table so that Fen could see him. His ears waggled a grin. "You'll learn in time, just like everyone else." He tapped on his pad some more as he walked back into Fen's view. "In fact, here, you can see the first part of our plan." He turned his pad so that Fen could see it. On the screen was a confused mess of light and streaks of energy, but as she stared, she realized what she was looking at. It was K'laxi ships attacking her expeditionary force.

"No," she whispered. "What are you doing?"

"I'm doing what my ancestors should have done centuries ago. We are taking back our agency."

"But K'laxi and Humans have always been allies!" Fen's voice was wavering. She knew that Ma-ren had planned things, and she wasn't able to learn them without alerting the Nanites, but... was it this?

This is what happens when you try to defy us, Fen. It never works out. Do you think you're the first to try and do something without us knowing? We always learn. It always fails.

"I don't even know what Han'iel is doing! I have no idea what he and Ma planned! I can't try and trick you if I don't know what's going on." Fen thought.

Fen's worries were interrupted by thuds and pings against the hull of her ship. In the distance sirens sounded, and she could hear pressure doors slamming shut.

"Han'iel what is going on? T̵͌͜e̶̓ͅl̶̟͌l̸̪͘ ̶͈̾m̸̱͝e̶̲̾.̴̣́"

The K'laxi's body stiffened when she used the Voice, and he turned to face her. "Empress, by now you should have been able to figure it out, but if you're still feeling the effects of the anesthetic, then I will indulge. You are no longer Empress. The K'laxi are attacking your ships, and have informed Venus that their rule extends no further than Sol once again. We have the Gren, the Sefigans, and the Xenni on our side.

A minor setback. Just order him to stand down, and give up.

"Don't think I don't know about those little nanotechnology weapons you have swimming in your blood and in the air. You may have kept quiet about them, but we were able to discern there presence and were able to isolate our lab from them." Han'iel nodded to himself. After our work on your antimatter weapons, we dedicated ourselves to reverse engineering them, actually. Would you like to see something interesting?" Han'iel took out a little phial from his coat pocket. Inside it was a black, oily liquid, and somehow absorbed light, but also shimmered as he tipped it back and forth. "These are nanomachines, but our own. We took the general template from yours and improved them."

What.

"Improved? What did you do?" Fen swallowed and she could feel sweat bead on her forehead. Was it her doing that, or was it the Nanites?

****

Gord was glued to the telescopes, watching the battle. It had started as a close match, but the K'laxi ships were going to win. As he watched, a second human expeditionary ship was destroyed. As the white fireball died away, he saw the K'laxi ships swarm the debris. What were they doing?

Chloe sat in the command chair while Gord stared. She ran a diagnostic on the ship for the third time. Everything was fine and in excellent working order. She checked the reactors, the matter printers, and the weapons. Finally she sighed. "Gord. We're going to have to either help or leave. Once the K'laxi run out of targets, they're going to scan the system and find us. I have a feeling they won't stop to as if we're actually human or not."

"Dammit." Gord's voice was quiet. "I - We can't leave Fen. She's falling victim to a coup. You know what happens to the old ruler." Gord made a gesture drawing his thumb across his neck.

"So you want to go in guns blazing and rescue her?" Chloe's eyes were wide and she half chuckled in disbelief. "Gord, I don't think we should pick sides so easily just yet."

Gord closed his pad and stood up. "No Chloe, you're right. I'll go in quietly, grab her and leave."

"How are you- no. No Gord!" Chloe stood up. "Those things are dangerous. They never work right. How many people died when we used them against Melody?"

Gord crossed his arms. "Chloe, it's the only way. You're right in that we shouldn't throw our lot in with humanity... yet, but I can't let Fen die out there alone. Will you help me?"

"Fuck me Gord." Chloe sat back in the command chair. As she did, she leaned her head all the way back against the headrest. There was a click, and when she leaned her head forward, ten hair thin wires were connected to the base of her neck. "I'm online, Gord." Chloe's voice came from the ship's speakers, though she still looked at him with a sour face. "I'll get some high resolution scans while you put the pack on.

Gord made it to the armory in less than a minute and pressed his palm against a wall opposite the weapon lockers. He felt the scan tickle and handshake with his subsystems, and the wall slid open, revealing a rack of AI weapons and armor. Gord picked up a massive battle rifle like the one he used to save Fen so long ago, and grabbed what looked like an old hiking frame. It was black and metallic, and fit on his back snugly. As he shrugged it on, lights on the side started to blink and an overlay of the pack flooded his vision. "I hate this thing." Gord said to nobody.

"I hate it too Gord. Tell me why you're using it again?" Chloe's voice was in his ear.

"You damn well know why. Do you have a navigation solution?"

"A millisec. Yes, I have one." Gord's overlay showed Fen's ship as an outline in his vision. As he turned, the ship stayed where it was in space. a section in the middle glowed yellow. "You may link when ready. Remember you have two shots on that pack - one there, one back."

"I know, I know. Don't forget I was there when they were first used." Gord grumbled as he reached behind himself and flipped some chunky toggles.

"Safe travels then." Chloe said, and there was a flash of white in the armory, and Gord was gone.

****

"We merely took the nanomachines that you had and made our own. Smarter. More powerful. Able to engage your nanomachines and defeat them. Each of the beacons we sent out into the Galaxy has a supply onboard as well as instructions on how to construct more. Since you weren't forthcoming with your own, we also let everyone know about your pet nanomachines. Ours will defeat yours."

He's bluffing again. We can sense nothing of the sort from his phial.

"You're bluffing," Fen said. "My Nanites can't detect anything from your phial."

"Oh, that's because they're not active. Hold on one moment." Han'iel put the phial back in his pocket and tapped on his tablet quickly. He then took out the phial. "There. Now can your pet nanomachines detect them?"

"Well?" Fen thought.

There was no reply.

Han'iel's laugh was the staccato barking cough of K'laxi laughter. "I can tell by your expression that they have been able to detect them, here." He popped the top on the phial and tipped it upside down. "Now they can become more aquainted."

As the phial was tipped over, the oily black liquid poured out, but before it would have splashed onto the floor it had disappeared into a black fog which quickly dissipated. Fen's eyes were locked on the fog, as it roiled and spread across the floor. She noticed that whenever the fog touched something, it began to... be eaten for lack of a better description. Walls, floors, things were slowly disappearing.

"Ah yes, they're hungry. Don't worry Fen, they know enough to not completely consume the ship. They are merely increasing their numbers to meet the threat of your Nanites. They will grow in number until they are sufficiently numerous to overwhelm your Nanites and destroy them." Han'iel looked around, and sat in a nearby chair. "My studies have led me to believe that the removal of your level if Nanite... infection is fatal. I am curious to see if that's true."

"Han'iel, what? What are you doing? I thought you and Ma-ren had a plan."

"Ma-ren? Your dead wife? I never knew her. I never met her."

Fen felt light headed. The room began to spin. This wasn't the plan? This wasn't what Ma had worked so hard to have happen? She began to hyperventilate. "No, that can't be true. You said that phrase to me. Ma-ren utemia lak'men. It triggered my memories."

"Ah, that. Yes, that was recommended by a colleague to tell you in order to distract you long enough to finish the beacon printing and complete the final preparations. I assume that someone else had been working on you for a long time. I am merely the trigger to the weapon that was built and armed over may years right under your nose. Fenchurch, Empress, you are dead. What you are experiencing now is merely a vehicle coasting to a stop."

Fen began to thrash in her bindings. She could feel something... odd happening. The Nanites weren't speaking to her, but they were doing something. It was like her skin was boiling, like her head was on fire.

As Han'iel watched, there was a flash of white light and a thunderclap on the command deck. The noise and shock were such that even his active noise cancelling couldn't absorb it all, and he was knocked back from the pressure. Dazed, he sat up from the floor and saw a man, human shaped, wearing a large black contraption on his back untie Fen. "Stop!" His voice was muzzy from the concussive blast. "Leave her, she's already dead. There will be no more Empress."

"That may be, friend," Gord said, "But I intend to make sure there is still Fen." he wrapped her into a huge bear hug, and the two of them linked away.

[justanoval]

Life Updates

Hey Tumblr gang!

If you've noticed I've been active less on platforms like Patreon, Twitch, Discord, and even a little less frequent with my YouTube uploads, this post will address that.

The biggest reason is that I simply do not have enough energy to delegate anymore. With my health issues progressing, I've been slowly losing my energy to give out to different areas, and I've had to decrease my focus.

My main focuses are now animations, music, merchandise, and Creeper County.

That's the jist. If you want more specifics, you can keep reading further.

Twitch

I really really struggle to have any energy for streaming. I can't keep up the hype and I feel like I am not doing anything by just being live. I want to have the freedom to do other things whenever I want, and I don't want to feel like I am being judged with every creative decision I make. A few decisions of mine revolving around how I built my audience is what lead me here, so while there's ways I can see myself coming back to Twitch, I just don't have the energy for it at the moment.

Discord

Discord was my biggest strategy to help grow my Twitch channel--and it worked fantastically. But now that I'm inactive on Twitch, I've decided to delegate the energy used on Discord for something else.

I don't expect myself to like, delete my Discord, but it's just something I am fine with being there primarily for announcements right now.

I'm focusing more on creating a smaller, more intimate community with Creeper County. This is what I've always wanted in building a community.

Patreon

I've made an announcement there already if you're interested in reading. The jist is that it isn't a reliable income source for me to dedicate that much time to it. It's just going to sorta stay as a donation platform for the time being. Not that that's bad (it's what most people tend to do), but I think it's still reasonable for me to make clear.

YouTube

I wouldn't say I'm too inactive here, I just don't upload as often. It's like, as opposed to once every 4-7 days, it's once every 7-10 days maybe now.

Big reason here is, of course the energy, but also I'm just exploring many different art forms right now. Had a dip in motivation with main channel animations and needed to figure out why. For the most part, I have figured out why, but there's still some direction I need to find.

Though you can look forward to a shrimp miku video coming soon.

Postmortem in Nuuspace

This isn't one I have really been inactive in, since I never promised an activity level. But still figured I can address that I am planning out a much larger story that will be based in this universe, which is why my current writing rhythm will be quite sporadic.

Not to say this will ever be finished, or published, or whatever (it might idk), but it's just what I am doing.

I know I didn't have to make this post, but it gives me some closure! I didn't want to leave anyone in the dark, and this way I know that I haven't (unless people don't read this, but that ain't on me).

In the future, I honestly expect that most of my energy will come down to video game development. It's like, all of these little things I am doing will just point towards one massive thing. And given my experience with Godot engine, making music, writing, 3d art, pixel art, animation... you see where this is going.

So, stay tuned.

[lillysilvermoon]

What April will bring to you?

Pile 1

Hi pile 1! So I see that a lot of you are going through a difficult time in life. Some of you maybe are over thinkers and are feeling restricted by your own thoughts or a situation (for some I feel it's your environment that makes you feel this away). I think a lot of people here are going through end of cycles and has been really hard, especially because some of this ends are feeling like some kind of betrayal (I am so sorry Pile 1🥺) I feel like it is the end of friendship and relationship for a lot of you. BUT I have good news to y'all. This situation is because you are not seeing the BIG PICTURE, I know has been hard, believe me I know how it feels, but what I heard someone's guide say is "she is not realizing that SHE can figure it out! That's the lesson, it's all with her" and even tho not everyone reading this is a "her" I think this applies to a lot, really A LOT of you. Here me out: we can't control everything in life, endings can create space for new opportunities to emerge and hold on tight in this situation/relationship/thing will only cause you pain. April asks you go stabilize your energy, to try control less and go with the flow more. This month you bring you more balance and patience (for some it's what you will need to learn or work to be better at) and avoid extremes, maintain a sense of calm. I have a very good example: you know tiktok trend that "omg you wronged with me now I am the most BAD BICTH here me out are you seeing how bad I'm now?? Yeah now I hate you and don't care about anyone" it's what I'm talking about. Hate someone it's exhausting, and I'm NOT saying to have the toxic positive also, because this is a extreme too. Just.. focus on you in april okay? Focus on develope more patience, a calm mind and take care of yourself. April will be all about this, this "mind care" you know? And also to learn to go with the flow more, it's a big thing here.

April is about change, shapeshifting maybe, something is developing in y'alls lives. You know all this struggles and cycles? It's finalizing, and you know what the guide said about you can change the situation? This card here (it's from moonology oracle) says that YOU can still change the course of this outcome (you are in a toxic relationship and are thinking this is a sign that "ong I can change him/her blablabla" IT IS >NOT< but you can change the fact that you are in this relationship and put a end at it).

This card also talks about the need of more flexibility in situations.

I highly recommend to calm your mind because maybe will have some very emotional intense situations in this moment, maybe related to family issues (but don't worry, usually this card indicates the end of some challenge. It's also time to overcome your insecurities and stand up for yourself.

Signs: Roses, flowers, lake, oak trees (this was to specific lmao), landscape and horses (maybe you should check out Pile 2??) 4444, 6666, 222

Pile 2

Hi pile 2! Let's get into your reading, shall we?

So I think y'all have been working on something and its kind weighting on your shoulders. Maybe you are feeling overburdened, overloaded and/or having too much responsibilities and challenges, and because of this you feel like your life are lacking spontaneity... I HAVE GOOD NEWS!!!!!! I know has been hard, but you are almost there with whatever you are doing. April you brings to you lots and lots of good moments with family and friends, and for a very small group a lover (possible Soulmate connection) a feeling of true contentment you know? You will feel more confident and have the drive to overcome obstacles and moving forward in a very positive direction, I feel you will learn how to channel you inner power with very fierce dedication to bring your goals to fruition, and even tho will have work to do, will feel much more spontaneous and just happy in general, a sense of confidence in what you are doing. You will have more time to enjoy with friends and when is time to work again you'll be feeling happy and energized.

It's a moment to you stop and think abouts what you learned from your experiences rather than blindly forging ahead,you need to face your fears because they may be holding you back (you are also being called to listen to your feelings and allow your emotions to be free) it's important to you to have faith that whatever happens will be for the best. Some of you REALLY need time out for your own good and health, breathe, have time to relax because you just CAN'T be "on" all the damn time gosh, also if you feel you've hit an obstacle or failed in some way, now is the time to reflect about it and how you can do things differently next time (without judging yourself please, I feel I have to emphasize this a lot, don't be so hard on yourself you are just human)

Signs: books, wood/smelling of woods, barbie movies, color link, number 8 (I think it's a date, caterina, 222, 5555, 66, pisces, cancer

Pile 3

Hi Pile 3, welcome to your reading! I just saw 11:11 when I finished shuffling your cards and was like, literally just the time for to see it and then changed lmao. But let's get started! You may be in between 2 options or 2 paths and you don't know what to do, I think you have been daydreaming and procrastinating because of your indecisiveness and I have to be honest: you need to stop living in this wishful world. Pick and choose, but don't worry because your guides have your back, if you stop and really, REALLY be in silence (no music sir) and hear your intuition you will know which path to go, and be aware that I'm not saying will be easy, but your intuition will help a lot, I feel you may be a water sign because you got more cups, but you can just be very sentimental and make decisions based more on your heart and feelings (I got you🙌💗) and sometimes it's hard to decide where to go, what to do. I feel you need to put EVERYTHING aside, think what you wanna do? What would makes you happy? What you are good at? Those are good questions to begin with, maybe journaling would help too! I feel you maybe have to face you family disapproval depends on your choice and this is weight on you but honestly? It's your life and you have to do what YOU think it's better, because more you get older more you realize it's not worth be miserable just to make out parents/friends/etc happy. Really isn't. When you listen your intuition you will realize what you truly want, and will be easy to choose. April asks you this, and know that you shall succeed. If you are looking for a job or starting a business know that April may bring you a new start in this area, if you are unhappy it's the moment to look for something new and even tho you aren't thinking about work-related stuff it's a moment for a new plan or strategy, it's a moment to do long-term plans and think about where you want to be and who you want to be in the next 12 months, and take steps by this perspective (be realistic). And here this: you CAN be ambitious!!

You need to be more disciplined and realistic, it's also a good month to study or learn something new.

In general april brings you reflection to decide what you want, and once you have make your mind it's all yours, it's a very good month you just need to get off your head and make a choice.

For anyone facing a problem of any kind: it's reaching a solution and a fresh start in your private life is coming! It's also asked to you to take better care of yourself this month and nurture yourself more. And be aware of any insecurity you have, you need to work on them ie they will hold you back (maybe you can't make a decision because of this and as soon you take care of this you will be able to choose more calm!!) Its literally written in the book card that meditation may help with you with insecurities lmao I would give a try.

It's also a good month in family matters.

Oh, and one more thing: don't be to controlling and avoid people who are!

Signs: capricorn, cancer, water, earth, library, candles, green places, owl,55,1111, 22, 66

Pile 4

Hi Pile 4! April you be very rushing, you are progressing and gaining momentum. Lots of good moments and exciting times. If you are working on something you'll see results and you work and sleepless nights you be paying off (for some you may have some holiday romance 😏😏 there is any holidays coming? Here in my country it's just Easter - English is not my language and I actually had to go see how it's said because here it's called Pascoa lmao) you will be feeling more outgoing and full of energy (I am so happy for you Pile 4😭💗💗💗) and optimistic and independent. You will feel called to take charge of things and organize your life. Also, if you have problems to speak your truth, well, april it's looking at this problem and saying "bye bye🤭" because you will work on yourself and will stand up for you unafraid to speak up and be unapologetically you!

But I need y'all to pay attention because it's a general reading, and I see here that some of you might be turning down and refusing offering and after you can feel yearning and regret and then might start focusing on the negative. Don't do that! Sometimes, for a very big amount of reasons, we take decisions that we regret later (sometimes right after lol) but try to train your mind to think this away: it's experience. It's knowledge, take the lesson and live the rest behind with no regrets. If you need to take decisions this month don't be impulsive, contemplate and meditate over this and reevaluate what is best and important for you. Also focus on realizing what makes you feel bored or unhappy and make a change can help a lot.

And I have 2 options here: the first one is that you need to stan firm in whatever situation you are in (maybe you are recovering and things are kind hard) and the second one is that something is stuck, in this case you need to stop and think what is going wrong. Are you being stubborn and doing the same thing again just because worked in the past? If that's the case, it's time to try something new. Anything you are starting this month (business, relationships) may last longer. And you have a reminder to speak your truth (do you know that people who have womb can have problems if they don't speak? Thyroid problems too, This applies to a hell lot of stuff, feelings, traumas, anger. So please, speak. Put this out off you the better way you can) but remember the words you say have consequences and impact in the person who is hearing so be mindful. I also feel I should say this here: someone is interested in manifestation and use affirmations can help a lot, "your words are your wand, you create your own realitye every time you express yourself" (metaphysical Florence Scovel Shinn) so be mindful the away YOU talk to YOURSELF, say kind words to you even if you don't believe in them at first.

Signs: Gemini, fixed signs (taurus, leo, scorpio and aquarius), color red and orange, 444, 111, 333, 555, beach, oceans, trees and bicycles (?? Sometimes this readings are so specific that I just can't-)

Good april for all of you, I hope y'all be okay, happy and take care of yourselves (and drink you water please, also sleep well and eat right please. I worry about you all working too much) see you in my next reading.

Lots of love♡

- Lia

[whats-the-word-again]

ᨒ⋆˚࿔ King Paimon ˚⋆ᨒ

[disclaimer, I use He / They to refer to King Paimon]

Today I was going to meditate with Archangel Cassiel, but instead I was heavily pulled towards meditating with King Paimon. I think it went quite well, so I decided to share it here.

When I was first gathering all my stuff, I had this strange feeling I needed to give something. Now of course I would've given Him an offering of a libation, maybe some water or a tea. It instead ended up being some purfume, which I initially found odd; but it turned out that He quite liked it. It's a smell that reminded me of Him, and the bottle was purple, a colour which I associate with Them being royalty.

[insert me having to decipher my own writing]

Meditation Session I made sure to face West directly, I had open His sigil on the front page [of my dedicated book to Them], the repeated His enn quite a few times. I was mainly trying to focus on the sound of the aircon and not the song stuck in my head. Then I felt like King Paimon ['s energy] appeared, so I tried to really clear my head to remain respectful, and focus entirely on Him and His energy. The colours orange and purple came up a lot, colours that I heavily associate with Them. Then it felt as though I was on a camel, King Paimon's one. I started sawying, because it just felt natural to do so. I then invisioned His sigil, my eyes tracing over the lines so closely, moving with them, so I could create the image in my mind - it was very relaxing. It felt as though King Paimon was in front of me, on the camel, controlling it of course. But it felt as though I was resting my head on Their back, almost falling asleep. The area surrounding us felt very familiar as an Australian, it was half bush / outback and half desert. The town hall in which I usually find us in was there, seeing it from the outisde. We'd stopped there, it felt like there was a random bonfire there too, and there were two figures standing in front of it; I know the accompany King Paimon when an offering is made, but I regretfully can't remember their names. We had gotten off the camel by this point. And either I was getting closer to the or they were getting closer to me, because the shadowsgot bigger. Then a hand reached out to me - King Paimon's, and I was snapped out of the meditation. I believe King Paimon said a few things to me during all of this, but I'm not confident enough to discern whether what was said was Him, or just my mind. Either way, I could tell He was pleased? I think by my offering and conscious effort to bow. THANK YOU & AVE KING PAIMON

After researching, I remembered that the two 'figures' that were there were most likely the two Kings that accompany King Paimon; Labal and Abalim.

Also at the end I mentioned bowing. I forgot to mention that I bowed when I felt King Paimons presence. I have been actively trying to remember to bow / show physical respect when in His presence; They demand respect for Their title and I will happily oblige.

Here are some pics from the vibe of what I visualised. The house is more dark brown on the outside; and the bonfire was almost right next to the house. And of course there were two figure not just one.

I'm very grateful for King Paimon being so patient with me; I feel as though He'd much rather me go very slowly than rush things and mess something up. In the grand scheme of things I'm still very new to demonolatry and still learning everyday, so I appreciate the (distant) kindness that They have shown me. I say distnat because that's how it feels, like when someone is still kind but more detatched - of course this is because I do not have so much of a bond with Him yet. And that's okay. I'm very excited for the future, and what King Paimon will be able to teach me. Anyway, I hope you're all well! -> divider by @/k1ssyoursister

Ave King Paimon!

[terrence-silver]

I honestly see Terry loving to spend time with his beloved in the bathtub with lots of bubbles and champagne 🍾 🥂

---

I can downright see Margaret and his staff knowing Mr. Silver is having one of 'those days'. One of those days meaning a day he will predominantly spend soaking in his jacuzzi (or sauna) with a cup of tea or some champagne. They know him well enough to be able to predict his habits and moods and very professionally adapt to them. Hey, it might just be very precisely scheduled down activity instead of something spontaneous so it is no surprise or unprecedented, overlooked accident. He's a man of business, so everything's possible. They know and understand Mr. Silver will be naked for the better part of the morning, afternoon or whenever he so chooses (maybe even pulling an all-day dedicated to being in the water), and that he absolutely won't be alone in that endeavor either; beloved will be in there with him and they just work around the circumstances like nothing's going on, the staff (or to be more accurate, Milos) is there diligently preparing a two of everything; matching robes, matching towels, matching champagne glasses, matching slippers. I feel these people are legitimately very blasé and used to his nudity and that they ain't shocked by too much of anything, which is no surprise, considering they're working for Terry Silver and goodness knows what things they've witnessed in his employment so far. By extension, they aren't shocked by beloved's nudity either, in the cases beloved's joining him. In fact, it might be a mundane thing for them.

Margaret brings her business to the side of the tub.

Conducting it with Terry while he soaks.

He absolutely makes million dollar deals from that tub, takes important oversea calls, handles emergencies as they pop up, deals with paperwork in a stride, directs Margaret on what meetings she should cancel and which she should forward to later and doing so while beloved's right beside him, lounging neck-high bubbles, making small talk and joking around, perfectly mixing absolutely shameless decadent hedonism with genuinely being dedicated to work at all hours like he has an infinite resource of energy to him, coming off as both lazy and legitimately invested. Might just sip his hand between beloved's thighs in the middle of a phone call conducted in the bath and do the business of the company while also doing the business of his own sexual urges, groping beloved, touching them, fondling them, massaging them and caressing them underneath the bubbles to get a rise or reaction out of them or flat out place beloved on his lap and grind on them while he shouts orders at his Dynatox agents stationed in Colombia to hurry up and dump that load, nearly cackling into his own chin at the deliberate perverted (somewhat childish) innuendo he just made and that the person on the other end of the line won't understand right before hanging up, causing Margaret or whoever's present to roll her eyes at him, chastising him like an older aunt figure would, because Jesus Christ, this man and his blatant perversions.

-"Mr. Silver!"- She clicks her tongue.

-"C'mon, Margaret!"- He might whine as beloved playfully smacks his chest, covering their eyes, flustered because it is just too much and they can't get away, considering his arms are tangled around them under the layer of steaming hot water, preventing them from getting up and leaving. There's no leaving. They're his bath toy. He does business better with his squeaking rubber duck bath toy around, don't you know, he might explain, teasing and taunting.

He's unhinged when he's happy and happy when he's unhinged.

He doesn't need privacy whatsoever to have a day spent in the tub with beloved.

When he does order for some privacy, though, sparks fly.

They won't be leaving that tub all day and everyone in the mansion knows why.

And probably hears why.

Maybe even sees why because he doesn't make a tremendous secret out of it.

[moeblob]

So I didn't draw it today BUT I really need to focus on commissions so I'm counting that as my art of the day despite probably not finishing one day TO post. So you get this instead.

Deacon as stated before is basically paid to be intimidating but he truly can't help but light up for the lightning deity because "that's the friend of my boss!" so he properly greets her with a "Lady Fulj" as a formality and respect. While he does respect the deity he's sworn to, he just calls him boss. That's what he gets.

He doesn't have any magical powers but he's got a strong sense of energy regardless. He can pinpoint when Fulj arrives. He can sense in the room he guards to make sure Ymber is still there (though he doesn't teleport and that's the only exit. But when Fulj visits and he's still outside he senses both deities and it puts him at ease.

What impresses Ymber immensely is the split fire deities - he can personally sense that one is around but he doesn't know which. He simply recognizes their energy as "fire deity, be on high alert". Then one day as he's getting tense over it (the fire deities like to tease him), Deacon reassures him "hey it's the guy today! I noticed he is less brutal in his comments it will be fine C:" and Ymber is stunned that he can identify which one is there before seeing them.

Deacon can also sense spirits and in Ymber's temple can actually see and hear them. But he doesn't tell them or interact, he lets them be in peace. Until he laughs at something one says and the spirits realize he's heard them for the past multiple years which is ... embarrassing. In addition to that, he can usually sense a monster out of town. On his rare walks with Ymber he's able to guide them around the monsters easily so neither one has to fight (though he gladly would fight em and he knows Ymber could one shot any of them).

He wants to be well trusted by Ymber and figures it won't happen, Ymber is simply too closed off and reserved. That's fair. Deacon assumes it's his mortality at play and why entrust him with his past experiences when he's just going to die sooner than Ymber would bother with. Which then shocks him when Fulj gets upset about "he didn't even ask for consent" and gets angry at Ymber for not telling Deacon. So she guilts Ymber to tell Deacon "um, I apologize for not asking you but I have extended your life. By a few centuries. I'm sorry" expecting Deacon to get upset at having to leave behind any loved ones as he doesn't age or die anytime soon. But! Deacon as a dedicated follower aiming to only please his boss is delighted by the trust shown by wanting to keep him around longer and proceeds to take his job as guardian/bodyguard even more seriously (which is hard to do with how serious he was before).

Anyway I won't go into the details now since this is already an essay but I've been shoving suffering onto Ymber and Fulj and why they are both like they are - withdrawn (Ymber) and enamored by humans (Fulj). But not for happy reasons.