#I hate seeing his appeal being reduced to him looking cute. He literally has so much appeal if you actually pay attention to him

[dirkxcaliborn]

Every day of my life someone treats Nazuna like a child (and you can guess how that results in the characterization of his fans) and it makes me foam at the mouth like a wild dog.

Like. The narrative doesn't even joke about people mistaking him for being younger. That's not a thing. He's literally just short. And he's also older than like 90% of the cast.

God forbid an adult man be 5'3" and beautiful. Can't have shit in ensemble square.

[asotin]

what're your thoughts on castlevania (the netflix show, not the game, ive never played the game) what do you like, what don't you like? make it as long as you want. i don't care if i have to scroll for 5 minutes. go feral (personally trevor is extremely hot and i would like to date sypha. i'm not really into alucard's whole sickly victorian child aesthetic, yknow?)

oh god this is way too long, but you did say to make it as long as i want, and i have a lot of thoughts that i need to inflict on the world

i played two castlevania games, both from the nintendo gameboy era, so please don’t get mad at me, gamers

details below the cut, but since i’ll be talking about season three, i need to preface this with content warnings for mentions of: graphic violence, rape and sexual violence, racism, and the holocaust

before i get into it, i usually don’t go for alucard-type characters either, but knowing that he was redesigned to be bishounen sexy specifically because the boring, middle aged man look he originally had in the games wasn’t appealing makes me enjoy him. and he’s fun with trevor and sypha

do like:

the voice acting

it’s all good. i can’t think of any characters whose voices were awkward or fit poorly. they don't make sypha’s va use the standard flat affect or false high voice women tend to be assigned, trevor sounds suitably worn out but not monotone, and alucard sounds exhausted but in a sexy way

and the spanish dub is killer, arguably superior

the animation & design

it isn’t full-on artsy, but it’s definitely got a distinctive style that’s easy to look at. the color use and effects are gorgeous. it’s a story set in the medieval era, and the mixture of desaturated and oversaturated elements works so well with that

dracula’s castle and the belmont bunker aren't revolutionary in design, but they didn't need to be. they're suitably creepy and empty, and i enjoyed them

the monsters were unique enough to have obvious different types, and the scene where a monster commits blasphemy in a church by accusing a priest of committing blasphemy was good writing

lisa

she shows up to a stranger’s spooky home and scolds him for being rude. she really looked an ancient vampire in the face, told him he had no manners, then had a kid with him. what a phenomenal woman. 11/10, no notes

“start with me, and i’ll start with you.” you know what? i’d fall in love, too

dracula

this ancient, unfriendly vampire let a human woman walk into his home and tell him he’s got no manners. and that made him fall in love with her. just like that. lisa walked in and handed him his ass, and dracula thought “oh i love her”. and when she was killed (more on this in the bad section), he raised literal hell to destroy the world for doing it

speaking of lisa being killed, it fucks me up that it happened because she convinced him to leave the castle and experience the world. he left her alone to see what she loved so much, only to come back and find that the people he’d come to like- the people lisa had loved so much it drove her to help in a way that got her killed- had burned her at the stake. i love a good tragedy, and that’s good tragedy

the way he weeps when he has to fight alucard?? during a showdown in their home?? the “i must already be dead” moment in alucard’s childhood bedroom??? when he speaks to lisa about killing their boy, her greatest gift to him??? poetic cinema.

the trio’s dynamic

three bisexuals with two total brain cells and only alucard bothers using them. incredible

i went so hard for this ot3. it's right there and so good

sypha

she initially seems to be assigned the role of the adult™️ ie she's the only woman and gets stuck being responsible, but surprise! she’s just as annoying and dumb as alucard and trevor. she dropped a castle she didn’t understand on the ground and didn’t think too hard about it. then she argued about breaking it. i love her

if we don’t get an ot3, then she needs to have a dumb gf

alucard

he's got a stupidly low neckline and lower pants. they really leaned into ayami kojima’s redesign, as they should have. his little curl annoys me, though. why the fuck does he have a random section of hair that’s like three inches long when the rest is shoulder length or longer? love that he really looks like lisa

if you say he's canonically bisexual and polyamorous, no he isn't. yes he is. no he isn't :)

trevor

disgusting. a nasty man whose appearance mirrors his state of mind. he's 50 mental illnesses in a dirty jacket and his coping mechanism is… alcohol? maybe? he’s a mess, and i dig it

him trying his trick of kneeing alucard in the balls during their fight? and finding out it doesn't work? (which…… why doesn't it……?) juvenile but suitable

hector

his love of animals makes him my favorite. normally, i won’t touch anything with this much animal death, but i’m willing to set that aside because hector loves them so much. he’s so sweet and kind, and he loves his monster pets

yes he sided with dracula and has some really fucked up ideas about what constitutes humane treatment of people, and yet i love him. 11/10, but i have a lot of notes

isaac

i support him, including his murdering and his decision to support dracula. dracula throwing him out of the castle to save him was so cruel in that it was an attempt at kindness from a man who hated the whole world, but it was against isaac’s wishes

his time with the captain was great

idk enough about islam to know if he's portrayed correctly and haven’t seen any complaints, but given the show’s track record……… i wouldn’t be surprised if it’s not great

the forging

very cool. fresh and interesting! hector creating pet friends is cute and heartbreaking. love isaac for his dedication to reducing, reusing, and recycling

season 2’s big battle with all those vampires

the new version of “bloody tears” is phenomenal

this goes back to the animation, but listen……. it's so good. i loved the smoke vampire, and alucard’s fluid wolf transformations. his flying sword looked really good, and incorporating them together? super good to watch. and trevor’s whip?

the type and level of violence are suitable for what it is. it would be weird for a gritty show like this to be bloodless, but i don't think it would work if it were bloody to the extent of a slasher. it's also more clean violence, if that makes sense. you don’t linger just to look at gore; you see it because stabbing someone spills blood. the games weren't about extended, gritty scenes of realistic murder, so the show sticking with quick, slice and dice type fights fit with what i remembered of them

please watch this fight if you don’t remember it or haven’t seen it (part 1, part 2)

trevor’s whips

trevor’s weapons don’t follow the physics of normal whips, and they shouldn't. they’re heavily stylized and clearly a fantasy weapon, but they still have rules that they (mostly) have to obey. his morning star-whip hybrid in particular is so good 

it’s easy to follow, too. a lot of times, speedy weapons disappear, which is an understandable effect but one i find boring because there’s nothing for me to do. i’m just sitting on my ass with nothing to do

trevor’s whips don’t disappear. they’re fast, but you can always see them. and they have weight! you can see them slow down and gain speed. i don’t need physics to be real; i want movement to be pleasing, and that’s exactly what i get with the whips

don’t like:

fridging lisa

she could have been kidnapped (possibly make dracula think she was dead bc people want to lure out her scary demon husband, idk), then s2 could have ended with her and dracula reuniting as he died. she and alucard go on a trip together to attempt to make amends for the pain dracula wrought in lisa’s name. orrrr she dies a tragic death with him and we’re left to hope that they find each other in the afterlife. do vampires get to go to the afterlife? can alucard reintegrate? can he be happy with his new friends? or will he go back to his crypt and sleep again? will he ever be rediscovered? if so, what will he do? deep questions. i would prefer to cogitate on these instead of experiencing the shitshow that is s3

season 3

they should have ended it with dracula’s death. the quality of storytelling goes down immediately. just plummets. i’m sure there were problems in the first two seasons, but this one is so bad, i genuinely can’t remember

but i may as well get specific, so here we go:

abandoning alucard

trevor and sypha leave their friend alone in his childhood home where he just killed his father. where they helped him kill his father who, as i’ve said too many times, raised literal hell to get revenge for people burning alucard’s mother to death

yt they don’t talk about alucard. they don’t make any plans to touch base ever again. trevor’s entire family got killed. sypha’s culture, from which she’s now estranged, is family-centric. if ever two people should give a shit about alucard and know why alucard shouldn’t be left on his own, it's them

so what the hell is going on?

trevor and sypha’s relationship

look. it could be good. it would be better with alucard but they could be together and it could work fine

but this……….

trevor hates what they're doing. he hates traveling around and fighting. he's clearly tired and deeply depressed

sypha not only doesn't care enough to address it (did they forget the first two seasons?? sypha is annoying partly because she doesn't stop poking people) she might not even notice? yes, she's having fun, but trevor is basically dead on his feet in front of her

racism

hector, sumi, and taka all got done dirty 

sumi and taka

i hate the way they died. i hate that i’m certain that the plot won’t bring japan back into the narrative (or if it does, i don’t trust it not to be shitty). i hate the fact that by killing them off, i’m not going to get any more of them. they were interesting!!

speaking of the japanese vampire: the biphobia, arguably, given what happens with alucard

the addition of sexual violence

i don’t need or want lenore. if all she’d done was manipulate hector, i could have lived with that. she’s a villain, so she does bad things. that’s the point. but what she did was a massive escalation. we hadn’t had any sexual violence, and then the last few episodes gave us 

tumblr feminists who love her for how she treated hector need to be quarantined until their brain worms have been cured

everything that happens to hector

what was this shit? why did i open my netflix app and tap castlevania and find them making this man walk around naked in the cold to torture him? and starving him? he got manipulated, degraded, chained up, collared like an animal, and raped. and why? to show us how bad lenore is? that the other vampires are bad because they let her do it? i didn’t sign up for this

the holocaust reference

the imagery at the end of s3 when it’s revealed that the judge has been killing people he’s decided are undeserving to live and collecting their shoes in that barn was chillingly close to images of shoes taken from victims of the holocaust. there's no reason to invoke the holocaust here. it’s unnecessary and in bad taste

[xsecretblastsx]

2x02 - Never Been Marcused

Here we are on a new recap, sadly we say good bye to the hamptons on this episode, but it seems fitting considering is the start of fall after all. 

This one of those episodes were I barely remember what happens except for a few scenes here and there from my first watch, so it almost felt like watching a new episode. Anyway here we go.

As usual recap under the cut:

Thoughts I had while watching the episode:

Akward morning after talk between Dan and Serena, not my prefered way for the start of an episode, but what can I do

Well they are kind of cute here, I’ll admit. Though I’m kind of glad Serena’s first instict wasn’t to get back together right there and actually acknoweldging their break up had a lot of reasons behind it.

Blair looks super cute riding that bicycle, so picture perfect. Too bad is only on paper. That Marcus guy is super boring.

Blair can be like “Revenge is so 12 hours ago” but Serena’s is all of us being like “Sure Blair, you totally love Marcus and all of this has nothing to do with Chuck ofc” 

I’m not sure if being refered as “ a perfect post Bass palate cleanser” can be taken as a compliment. And just like magic a wild Bass appears.

I’m just here to enjoy the akward moment every single boyfriend of Blair has to endure whenever they realize that Chuck Bass is going to be a relevant part of said relationship.

“For England” Marcus your nation is surely going to be proud of you for acting like a total englishman and accepting to be civil with Chuck Bass, the guy who just totally manipulated you into inserting himself in your date.

“Blair Waldorf a fling... you’re not exactly low maintenance” Serena speaking words of wisdom.

I guess abstinence (on Serena’s side mostly) was hard for Serena and Dan, otherwise I can’t understand why they’re acting as if keeping their hands to themselves is so difficutl, they never seemed that type of couple in S1.

Blair called him Charles, I guess she was pretty mad. 

That whole sequence of Dan and Serena fooling around on the Jitney is soooo extra, and so unintentionally funny.

Nate’s family drama is never ending, though imagine the tragedy it must be for any UES to lose their money. Auch.

Surprise! Nate’s fling is actually the Duchess.

This whole dialogue: “No offense but don’t you think you’re a little outmached?” “As a guy. Blair wants to be a princess (>.<) and your greatest achievement is owning part of a burlesque club” and the cherry on top “Oh you know is love when you star talking like an assasin” Oh Nate Archibald, I love you. 

Also apparently Chuck did spend tme with Bart from time to time, is kind of hard for me to imagine them playing Squash though.

Chuck keeping noble secrets from Nate. That’s love.

Hi Rufus... and Vanessa

Oh Marcus, giving so much intel to his new “best friend”.Also I kind of like the polo/vest combo Chuck’s wearing there. Weird.

“I have to present myself as crown jewel, sorrounded by other smaller slightly flawed gems, but quality stones nonetheless” this is such Blair thing to say haha.

“If you can’t find common ground wiht a dictator I don’t know who can” The added commentary is really making this episode for me. 

I’ve never related more to Blair than this moment where she express how great it is that Serena’s free from Dan.

I just love when we get to see how much Chuck actually cares about Nate, selling his shares of Victrola is no small deal.

Nate and Vanessa! I still can’t believe how much I don’t mind, and actually kind of like this ship.

I kind of would love to see Anne Archibald doing her shopping at Salvation’s Army.

I love the combination of that suit with that shirt Chuck’s wearing, the color really suits him. I don’t know why but I’m noticing his wardobre much more this time around. Figures. I do remember thinking the first time around he was going to try and seduce the duchess. Now that would have been another akward moment of “Sorry Nate”

Serena looks so pretty here, even if I’m not that fan of her outfil. 

“So she can warn me about the effects of too much botox” auch.  Chuck: 1, Blair: 0. and he’s definately enjoying it.

I so wish Rufus had gone to tour again. He deserved to live that dream to the fullest.

“A lowly Waldorf” wow. Even I was hurt by that. 

I love it when the GG voice oveer points out how ridiculous everything is. Case in point: “Chuck and Blair’s dates are mother and son, and Nate and Blair are exces, and Nate and the mother are in a book club?”

I get why Nate is mad at Chuck for not being upfront about the money, because it’s not easy addmitting that kind of problems in their wordl and even less accepting that kind of help, but Chuck’s intentions were good. Fact is he always helps Nate anyway he can.

The fact that Dan and Serena’s plotline this episode was basically just trying to resist each other, and I can’t help but think that this was the show’s way of trying to make them be more “chair like”, you know intense chemistry and sex appeal. As if.

“if the best version of the situation is I’m going to become Blair’s father in law I think is just time to move on” Now imagine that, thanks to Nate for putting that horrifying thought in my head.

And this is the start of Nate Archibald the gigolo.

“Oh my effing God” same Blair, same. Props to Nate for still acting so rightous and being all like “I don’t have anything to explain to you” 

Blair telling the Duchess how things are going to be now... You go baby Vamp!

“I’m gonna turned it in a novel” so I guess this throway line was the start of “Inside” 

Rufus beyond anything was first a Dad, the Humphrey kids got the best dad in the show, the kind of Dad any of the NJBC would have love to have as a parent, and yet they feel they were the unlucky ones.

That last scene between Chuck and Blair is such a display of chemistry a lot of ships wish they had. and the literal definition of what eye sexing each other means. 

I feel so bad for Nate and Vanessa right now... with the add visual bonus of her sadly blowing the candles for a date that wasn’t. Feeling sad for Vanessa, now that’s new for me.

So this episode while there are moments that I really liked and it did kind of move the plot forward in some points, it also fills a lot like a filler episode and like I don’t really have much to say about it. Maybe because these storylines while I don’t hate them I don’t particularly like them either, in particular this chapter of the Serena and Dan saga this episode feels such a waste of time, they’re basically stalling because they really don’t want to have the difficult conversation of why they broke up and how they can fix their issues, and so to keep avoiding they distract themselves with taming their unrestrained need for sleeping with each other... sorry but what?

I’m not saying there’s no chemistry between Dan and Serena, but their relationship in S1 except for like 1 or two scenes was very much rooted in cutesy moments, tenderness, and how Serena was better with Dan (ugh) and how he wanted for her, not only because she was super hot, they never acted like “oh it’s so hard to keep our hands from each other, and we can’t resist this atraction” that couple were Chuck and Blair, so on this episode I just can’t buy it, it seems forced, almost as if the show wanted them to be more exciting and outrageous... to keep them as the main couple of the show as they were suposed to be, after all at this point of the show while Chuck and Blair were getting more traction, they hadn’t really overtook the show as they eventually did. It also felt part of the “omfg” vibe the show was going for, that scene in the Jitney was so extra, though in my case rather than getting me into them just made me laugh. 

Nate storyline on the other hand is the one that really went places this episodes. It turns out his family is on the brink up bankrupcy because all the legal issues his dad is facing, and because his grandfather won’t help he and his mother are a very precarious situation wich leads Nate to seek help. He tries going to Chuck but on one hand he doesn’t really now how to explaint the situation, and also Chuck’s apparently really busy with scheming his way back to Blair. Except Chuck because he knows Nate is going to refuse him and he can’t help but help him either way sells his shares on Victrola and gives the money to Nate’s mom. Of course when Nate finds out he gets mad, because pride and also because he hates that Chuck lied to him about Victrola and to be fair it hasn’t been that long since they had a big fall out because Chuck wasn’t honest about stuff, so there’s that. Still, I feel I must take a moment to point out how much Nate actually means to Chuck? He loves that club, it’s a place with a lot of sentimental meaning too for a lot of reason and yet Chuck doesn’t hesitate to part with it if meants helping Nate. I know Chuck makes plenty of mistakes and awful things during the show, but these kind of moments are always kind of overlook and I just feel that’s unfair because only focusin on the worst of him, reduces him to this one dimensional villian, and in reality Chuck is one of the most complex characters on this show. These kind of moments are an example of his many layers.

So back to Nate, he ends up going to Vanessa, and I just feel this rewatch is turning me into a Nate and Vanessa shipper. Truth is I never hated this couple, but I was a bit meh to it, in part because Vanessa annoys the hell out of me for the most part, but I always thought she was less annoying with Nate. I like how she just sits and listens to Nate, and I think this is something that his best friends are not always the best at, Chuck tries but he’s more the type of friend that goes into action, he does what is need to do in order help rather than the heart to heart talk, and Nate and Serena’s friendship at this point while getting there, is kind of akward still and also there’s always some crisis going on her life that prevents her for being fully there, and Blair and Nate well.. they weren’t ever the talking type. So Vanessa helps with that, also when the show started Nate wanted in someway to detached himself from the UES and all it’s expectations and so Vannesa was that needed breeze of fresh air, and while she can be as judgy as Dan, I always felt she made more of an effort with Nate to be understanding than Dan ever was with the UES. So I like them, at least for now. Too bad Catherine happens and while Nate was really into the idea of having an affair with her this episode he realizes that’s an awful idea (the fact that she has a step son that’s older than him and is also dating Blair is admiteddly gross) but it’s a desperate time, and she offers him her help... and so we got Nate the gigolo, and that last scene in the taxi when he cancels on Vanessa made me sooo sad.

Lastly we have the Chuck and Blair part of the story, it’s always fun to see them scheming, and Chuck’s tactics these episode are rather sucessful at first and it’s mostly a display of him knowing Blair so well that he’s able to get the upper hand on all of her efforts to get on the Lord and his family good side. I should feel bad for her, in the sense that Chuck’s ruiningin her plans and it’s not fair because if he had showed up to Tuscany everything would be different. And yet I’m kind of glad he gets on her way because truthfully, this is just one of those times that Blair is trying to show herself as something she isnt’ in order to get a guy, and also climb higher in the social hierarchy, and it pains me because at the end of the day is just Blair not accepting herself, like Serena keeps pointing out through all the episode, just show the real Blair sure, she’s anything but low maintainance but there’s a lot of amazing in her that can make her shine to anyone. This plot also reminded me a bit of Blair and the prince storyline and also (because this party was trying to be very pretentious and sofisticated) that saloon thing she did with Dan in Season 5 and just remembering that gives me nightmare. So really not a fan of these particular scenes. In the end she ends up gaining the duchess via blackmail, which I like because I hate the Duchess so I’m all for Blair showing her Queen B side in full display and after this episode I missed it. It’s also the basis of that great moment at the end between her and Chuck in the Van der Bass kitchen, which is easily the most memorable thing in the whole hour and only for that I’m glad this episode exists. The chemistry and sexual tension  of this whole scene is amazing and it puts to shame all the Dan and Serena “can’t keep their hand of each ohter” scenes, this is how is done. Sorry Derena.

Random bits I noticed:

The Pierces song playing in the background at the start of the episode, “Boy in a Rock and Roll Band” always puts me in a good mood for some reason.

That pearl headband Blair’s wearing at the party were so popular here for a while, I loved it so much back then, I sort of wish I had one now.

I loved the “Summer 08″ collage the Humphrey’s had in their loft. It also had this phrase “ I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality... I still believe that we shall overcome” by Dr. Martin Luther King. Kind of relevant isn’t it?

Having and episode ending with a shot of  the NYC skyline at night, while New York, I Love You but You’re Bringing Me Down playing in the background... these are the kind of details I love. 

Ending with a Chuck pick because I really like this suit

[xoruffitup]

Adam in Burn This (6/12)

I saw Burn This again on June 12th and HOO BOY, for this show I’ve got nothing but flail! I think I’ve already worked through most of my critical analyst urges already, so this is gonna be just pure, chaotic Adam fangirling. :’)

The man was robbed of his Tony. Pale is this character who I would absolutely hate on the page or in abstract. But then Adam, the utter jerk, barges and flails his way on stage and makes Pale so human and compelling and just absolutely riveting to watch that hating him becomes physically impossible. I mentioned before how the play functions to make the audience Anna’s proxy (down towards the end of the second section here), and never has that been truer than last night. I literally was Anna, okay. I was repelled and intimidated and scandalized by Pale’s uncontrollable, massive presence; his encroaching, searing physicality; his unpretentious, guileless anger and passions and frenetic creative energy.

One second, you’re watching this massive brickhouse tumble into crying, sniffling pieces so vulnerable and wrecked it could tear your heart out. The next he’s cracking a joke, flirting, cussing, and every single swing is so bracingly authentic that you’re literally pulled to the edge of your seat, unsure if in attraction or revulsion. Either way, you’re along for the wild ride with him every step of the way, feeling the same conflicted and unwilling compulsion towards him Anna is. Pale doesn’t just unwittingly seduce Anna; Adam absorbs every single audience member’s attention like a black hole and before you know it the audience is caring for him even before they have any hope of deciding whether they even like him. (Evidenced by the collective gasp of fear that rises from the audience when Pale, drunk, climbs outside onto a fire escape.) To call him magnetic, electric, a revelation to watch – They’re all woefully inadequate descriptions. He’s a literal inferno, blazing even when he’s silent.

So even though I have yet to reach a personal resolution on whether I accept Pale from an ethical perspective, I am nevertheless complete trash for him because Adam really leaves me no choice in the matter. Damn him. <3

Last night I sat in the upper balcony for the first time, but my friend brought binoculars we passed back and forth (lol, yes really) and I actually saw so many new, detailed nuances to Adam’s acting. I’ll go through the moments that really stood out – though it’s honestly hard to pick because he really is that Extra during the entire damn play.

Act 1

When he puts his leg up on the couch to show Anna how “fucked up” his pants are, then kind of realizes he’s standing there with his leg all weird up on the couch, asking her to look at his pants… Then just smoothly lifts his leg over the table before he lowers it, then makes the coyest face ever at her while he does this slow, deliberate twirl with the most shit-eating look on his face. The audience dies, then he cracks “I coulda been the dancer,” and the audience falls apart again.

The way you can feel his momentum and buzzing energy begin to darken, right before he breaks down completely. When he stops pacing around for the first time and his voice changes, going soft as the guilt and sorrow creeps up on him in the form of physical pain he feels driving straight through his heart. And it’s alarming, when he goes still for the first time.

I swear I’ve never seen him cry so much as last night. Once he broke down, the sniffling was constant, with these utterly, completely broken sounds mixed in whenever he tried to talk.

“Nah, this ain’t me…” “I’m trying to picture him here.”

And he keeps aggressively pushing his hair back while he’s crying, as if he can force the tears away with brute force.

OKAY so watching their first kissing scene through a pair of binoculars was like being personally undressed and ravished, holy god. A bomb could have gone off in the theater and he wouldn’t have looked away from her, he had such consuming focus. When he slides close to her, the first thing he does is slowly lift a hand to touch her hair, his eyes darting between where his fingers brush the strands and her face, gauging her reaction. And then when he leans in so slowly for the kiss, watching her first before his attention shifts to her mouth, and the kiss is slow and deep and….

Yeah I felt things.

From up in the balcony.

Adam’s kissing sex appeal is literally so flaming strong, I felt that heat from the damn balcony. I dare you to show me another man with such raw, intense sex appeal. Go on, I’ll wait. He asks her, “You okay?” when he pulls back, and she says in a sort of daze, “I’m fine.”

….Girl, I feel it too.

AHEM ANYWAY MOVING ON.

And then in the next scene, as if totally oblivious that he’s a literal tornado of sex, he just sweeps out the door with an over-the-shoulder “Alright I’m outta here” and it’s so blasé and masterfully hilarious.

Act 2 When he’s laying on the couch alone, half-asleep, and starts vaguely waving his arm in an attempt to remove invisible blankets. Then, without a single word, he reduces the entire audience to hysterics when he spends a solid two minutes pulling at the collar of his coat in a completely futile effort to take it off. That’s the level acting we’re dealing with here. He’s one-hand fighting his own coat and trying so damn hard and it’s the most entertaining thing of your entire year like WHAT EVEN.

God alsdfjsdlakjf okay when he comes out in the kimono robe and it’s open at first, for like 30 blissful seconds that massive, toned chest is out there to see above those tight black briefs and it is SO MUCH I blacked out and couldn’t even process the sight the first time I saw the play. …. Then he closes the robe, carefully ties it, fights with the sleeves because they clearly aren’t built for massive fuckin arms like his, and in an instant he’s the softest being I’ve ever seen and I’m confused as hell as to how I’m aroused and ‘omg bb’ adoring at the same time??? I think I need therapy? Or Adam needs to stop being massive and sexy but also awkward and soft at the same time, for the sake of my sanity?

I fail to imagine an image that will make my life more than giant Adam in this tiny bright purple silk kimono that barely reaches his thighs, bare foot, tying a dish towel around a pot of tea he just made like a tea cozy, then oh so carefully carrying the tea pot over to the table with his one arm still out of the sleeve and this look of intense focus on his face. I was overwhelmed and could not even begin to name the feels.

Let’s make it even WORSE shall we? When he hands Anna a cup of tea, kisses her forehead twice, says “That tea’s no good for a bad stomach. You want some milk?” then strokes her hair back, then asks “You want some eggs?”

GOD PALE GET OUT WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT

(^ We are all Anna)

The part where he sneakily picks up the phone to eavesdrop on Anna and Burton’s phone conversation, and stays completely silent for a long minute before hilariously bursting out, “YA GOT SOMETHIN’ TO SAY, BRUCE?!” And then AND THEN Anna angrily storms out of the bedroom and the bastard hides his face behind the empty robe sleeve and bats his eyelashes at her and bends at the knees in this cutesy little sorority girl squat and IM….?! “Real cute,” Anna says, trying real hard to be unimpressed, while the audience is in an uproar and everyone’s desperately trying to process all these newfound perplexing Adam Driver feels (WELCOME TO HELL, BITCHES. IT DOESN’T GET BETTER)

Okay okay there are SO many juicy bits during the exchange when Anna’s explaining she wants things to end between them. I was watching through the binoculars and when Anna says, “We’re apples and oranges.” He immediately gets this hella adorable smirk when he goes, “Oh yeah? Who’s the apple and who’s the orange?” Then the smirk grows when he’s all “Ever had an apple tart glazed with marmalade?” And then he’s just grinning because he’s so damn proud of how clever he is and he’s still in the FUCKIN purple kimono and he is ridiculous, I’d hate it if he didn’t own me body and soul.

Then it gets BETTER when he says, “You told me you ain’t been with no one else since you was with me a month ago. Me either. I figure one more time and we’ll have ourselves a hat trick.” And oh my GOD the shit eating grin! He looks at Larry, just grinning like a 5 year old and Larry gives him this hysterical disapproving, unamused shake of his head, but Pale just looks back at Anna full-on sunshine smiling and I’m like WHY ARE U MY PERSONAL BABY

(PS: JJ – That is what we need to see on Ben Solo’s face in TROS. You better deliver!)

He says some of my favorite dialogue here – The bit about “people walking down the street don’t mean a thing they’re doing.” He grows somber here, and this is a portion of the play’s call to its characters to strive for both emotional and artistic authenticity no matter what the price.

And then the scene gets heavy…. He stands up, disappears to get partially dressed, comes out, they start arguing, he’s still determined to make her see what’s clearly between them… And then she drops the definitive bomb over everything: “I don’t like you and I’m frightened of you.”

I watched his face through the binoculars while she delivered the blows, and it was literally like seeing a candle snuffed out. His expression melted like ice – Resolute and hard and determined one moment, and the next moment her words rush over and visibly crush him as the certainty melts from his face and leaves him empty and shell-shocked. Three seconds of silence when nothing moves but the set of his mouth and the light and strength in his face, but you’ve seen a grown man utterly crushed.

Ah, the last scene. In the first performance it was devastatingly, beautifully heartbreaking. In later performances it was humorous even while tragically inevitable. Either way, it’s brilliantly written and exquisitely acted. (Though as I’ve expressed before, I do prefer the more serious, helplessly sad versions.) I’ve never seen the two of them clutch each other as desperately and heart-rendering tenderly as they did in this performance. She fell into him on the couch, and he cradled her entire body to himself – Reaching a hand down to her thigh to pull her across his lap so his arms could engulf her entirely. They rocked together, and she clutched his arms still tighter to herself, and he kissed all over her hair while they made sounds near tears. And then Pale does break open a bit with something approaching a sob, before he curses and objects “I’m gonna cry all over your hair.”

But he only holds her tighter, as if they’ve both lost all conscious control over their bodies at this point, in the face of the all-powerful compulsion drawing them into each other’s orbits. The ending of this performance was absolutely stunning, leaving you with a myriad of unraveled emotions that are at once painfully incomplete and ill-defined, and yet just as bitingly complex and untamable as the most compelling moments of reality.

Over all, it’s nothing short of incredible to see how Adam continuously succeeds in upping his game throughout the course of the play’s run. He already brought the house down at the very first preview, and yet he manages to find new twists and interpretations to embody each and every time. What struck me this time is how boldly natural he’s become in the role – The way he leans into the accent like he’s really spent his entire damn life using the hard edges of the pronunciation like verbal brass knuckles. Adam has gotten to the point where just a single emphasized vowel sound brings the audience to hysterics:

“I heard that mollaaases you were pourin’ over maaam. Needed a shot o’ insulin.”

“Good niiiight, sleep tiiiiight.”

“Drinkin’ and thinkin’, man. Worse than drinkin’ and drivin’.”

“Fuckin’ hate Christmas. Look out… ribbons.”

“Get outta here; You’re useless!”

“Lemon will kill yaaa!”

“That was me and youuu up there.”

He has mastered how to pitch his voice for perfect, killer comedic effect. What’s more is how effortless he makes it seem; How utterly guileless. How he can swing from ugly crying to casual insensitive quip in the span of a minute, and make it just seem like the routine (if highly irregular) over-active synapses of a guy on coke. Even just his body language, the way he paces around the apartment in Act 1, completely out of sorts and out of his depth, like he’s never seen a coat rack or a stove before; A physical embodiment of his discomfiture with the emotions that don’t feel like they belong within him. His presence is imposing and even threatening, and yet his body language is alert and defensive, sometimes even self-flagellate. He embodies so many idiosyncrasies and tensions, it’s easy to see why his emotions burst from him in such tidal, chaotic floods.

I’m so thankful to have tickets to the final performance next month! I shudder to think of the feels I will drown in over how absolutely legend-level powerful Adam’s performance will be at that point. What a talent. What a man. 

I’d be overjoyed to receive any and all questions/thoughts about the play! :) Thanks for reading!

[steppenshe-wolf]

"send me a fandom" ask + PoE?

the first character i ever fell in love with: Tuya and Tzipporah. I saw Tzipporah’s introduction scene before watching entire movie. I immediately saw a fearless and wise woman with a strong sense of right and wrong in her( and I am very happy that my first impression of her turned out to be accurate). I love how she called Rameses and Moses on their arrogance. It was very important to me because I always disliked guys like Moses and Rameses in their youth. Tuya caught my eye in that scene too, with her disapprovement of her son’s gross treatment of Tzipporah, the foreign slave.  Tuya finding baby Moses is the chronogically first of my especially beloved PoE scenes. It’s very touching and admirable that Tuya was so motherly to the baby she saw for the first time in her life, that quick she was  so quick to accept him as her son.  I have a thing for good adoptive parents trope. I was quick to appreciate Rameses as a character too due to his amazing facial expressions and due to his later villainy being brilliantly foreshadowed.

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not: n/a. I’ve been familiar with the movie only for 2 months. I think this is what most of people in my shoes would answer.

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: n/a.

my ultimate favorite character™: This is such a complicated question to me! Every single character in “Prince of Egypt” is special and powerful in their own way. I afraid I can’t answer this question unequivocally, I can’t make a choice without doubting it later. However, I think that Rameses is the character whose simplification, whose role reducing would damage this movie the most( anyone’s would damage the movie seriously but particularly Rameses’). I wouldn’t be that passionate about more literal adaptation of Exodus, Exodus far from my favorite Biblical story.  Rameses is very important for characterization of Moses, most of my favorite Moses’ traits were shown through Moses and Rameses’ interactions. Moses wouldn’t have been such a well-rounded and appealing character without said interactions.

prettiest character: Tuya. I love her face! I think she resembles Natalie Dormer( one of the most beautiful real life women imho) a bit. Tuya is very cat-like in her facial features, expressions and movements. This adds extra appeal to her already very charming character.Tzipporah is my second choice. Actually she is the one who I would find most beautiful before seeing movies, based only on random screencaps.

my most hated character: n/a. I don’t even feel mild dislike or total indifference towards any “The Prince of Egypt” character, leave alone hatred. The antagonists are my problematic faves, the good guys are loveable and admirable, the main characters are interesting, the minor characters are remarkable.

my OTP: Moses/Tzipporah! This is by far my favorite 2D Dreamworks couple and one of my favorite fictional couple in general. I think it’s very wise of Tzipporah to value humility in men. I love her impressed look after Moses’ “I’ve done nothing in my life worth honoring” line( one of the greatest lines in the movie). It’s also great that Tzipporah didn’t rush to fall in love with Moses,not even after him saved her sisters. Extra points for both Moses and Tzipporah being incredibly gorgeous-looking people.

my NOTP: Rameses/Moses. I feel like it somewhat loosens Moses’ bonds with Seti and Tuya and I love them as his parents too much. Also Rameses/the-woman-who-was-standing-near-his-throne because I prefer to headcanon Nefertiri’s looks very differently.

favorite episode:

saddest death: Rameses’ son’s for sure. Mostly( but not only) due to the effect it had on Moses and Rameses’ later relationship dynamic.

favorite season:

least favorite season:

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: Yocheved. I don’t hate, don’t dislike her and I am not even totally indifferent towards her, just much less passionate about her than the majority in fandom. To me she is the least remarkable named character in the movie which is alright, considering she has the smallest screen time of all named characters( right?). She is not dissapointing or problematic, I don’t think every named character has to be very impressive. I don’t think that her on-screen actions necessairly make her model mother( I am rarely impressed by saving-relatives-from-death scenes in general. I find Rameses promising Moses a pardon for murder and later pardoning quite overrated scenes too. Though, to be fair, Yocheved did much more costly thing to save Moses than Rameses did.) or proofs she was just as virtuous and kind as Miriam. Also I am not as impressed by “River Lullaby” as most of fans I know. “All I Ever Wanted”, “Through Heaven’s Eyes” and “Playing With the Big Boys” seem to be less popular than “River Lullaby” but they are much more special to me.

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: Seti. He is a horrible role model for modern politicians and I don’t want to deal with people who disagree with me. I dislike his idea of good ruler, his understanding of duty( because he feels it towards his ancestors and not his subjects) and how his hunger for power outweights his compassion. I mean maybe I can justify this by historical context but I can’t stand modern people with similiar values and philosophy. “Peace, ethnical and economical equality are overrated” is one of the most horrible things I may hear, I don’t consider modern people who say like that good people. I don’t blame Moses for rejecting Seti as father after learning truth. At the same time I love how susprisingly complex Seti is for a character with such a small screentime, I love Seti’s warmer side, I love that he was father to Moses in all but blood. I find his treatment of Moses more touching than Rameses’. Again, I don’t consider Moses ungrateful towards Seti because Seti action’s are the reason Moses needed to be adopted. I think I would hate Seti in Moses’ shoes but I am not in Moses’ shoes and I love Seti. Actually every antagonistic character in “The Prince of Egypt” falls under this category to me.

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave:  first and furthemost - Moses. I find his fate really heartbreaking, especially I feel sorry for him during last 30 minutes of movie. My own biggest fears are all fears of losing things I associate with my childhood and Moses’ fate remind me of my nightmares. Yes, I wish that God had chose another too… Moses also deserves better treatment from audience and fandom, he doesn’t deserve accusations of betraying Rameses.  Jethro deserves more screen time and reunion with his eldest daughter. Hotep and Huy deserve more love from fandom: they are by no means deep characters but they are so colorful!

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: Seti/Tuya. Couples, where the woman is beautiful, unlike her man, and much younger( or much more youthful-looking), nicer and kinder than him, are usually my NoTPs. However, Seti and Tuya are still very appealing couple to me. I really enjoy fantasizing about them spending time with their sons, as well as about Tuya caressing Seti.

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: n/a.

[bleachlists2]

My Top Ten Bleach Ships

Requested by Anon :)

I have a lot of Bleach ships, and too many for me to list here! I might make a part 2 in the future, but for now, here is a list of my ten favourite Bleach ships, just as a way for everyone to get to know me.  Let’s start with number 10!

10) AiShin (Aizen x Shinji)

Oh, the dynamics between these two! I’m not gonna lie, there is something quite appealing about this ship, but I can’t really explain what it is. Is it the implication that Aizen actually likes Shinji? Is it simply because they just look good together? I honestly don’t know, but I will admit that I like to ship them sometimes.

9) AiIchi (Aizen x Ichigo)

This ship is a guilty pleasure for me, honestly. Again, I can’t really explain why exactly I ship these two, but it just is quite appealing for me. I’ll admit, I also saw some fanart of these two that were quite beautiful and before I knew it, I found myself shipping this in addition to the many other ships I have. But yeah, guilty pleasure.

8) ByaHime (Byakuya x Orihime)

I’ll bet this one is a surprise, isn’t it? Yes, I actually do ship Byakuya and Orihime together sometimes. There’s something so adorable about cold and aloof Byakuya being shipped together with the sweet and cute Orihime, and some fanfictions have definitely helped in my view of this ship! Sure, Orihime may be a bit too quirky, but I can totally see Byakuya slowly growing fond of her and her growing fond of him too. So yeah, I like this ship as well.

7) RenIchi (Renji x Ichigo)

These two are quite shippy in both canon and in the anime fillers, so is it any wonder that I ship them? I already have a headcanon that Ichigo has a small crush on Renji and looks up to him a little bit, and that gradually evolves from an admittedly-adorable crush to a romantic relationship. They’re both strong-willed, incredibly loyal, and they’re total sweethearts despite looking like punks who could kill you. So I definitely ship them a lot!

6) RoseKira (Rose x Kira)

This is such a rare ship but I still love it quite a bit, honestly. I mean, we have Kira, who has been reduced to a shell of his former self from his years serving under Gin, who abused him both mentally and psychologically. Then we have Rose, who is trying to rebuild his former squad after they’ve been shattered by Gin’s betrayal. I can see Rose trying to build a tentative friendship with Kira and gradually getting him to trust him and open up a little, and while Kira is a little reluctant, he slowly starts to trust him again and eventually they fall in love with one another. I do wish this ship had more shippers, I’d love to see more works about the two of them falling in love!

5) IshiNemu (Ishida x Nemu)

Remember back in the Soul Society Arc, when Nemu offered Ishida some antidote for poison after his taxing fight against Kurotsuchi Mayuri? Remember how horrified Ishida was to see Nemu getting kicked around by her own captain and father? For me, this was the beginning of something beautiful. I really adore this ship because both Ishida and Nemu have a few things in common: they both have not-so-good relationships with their fathers, they’re both quite loyal, and they’re both dedicated. And besides, Ishida would be the sweetest boyfriend to Nemu: making her lots of new clothes, taking her out on romantic dates... just imagine it. It’s really sweet.

4) IchiIshi (Ichigo x Ishida)

Yes, I totally ship these two as well. For all of Ishida’s talk about how Quincy and Shinigami are enemies and how he refuses to be associated with the Shinigami, he does not hesitate to get involved and help Ichigo out. And they both have some things in common: they’re loyal, they’ve both lost their moms, and they’d go to hell and back for their friends. Not to mention, they care about each other much more than they’d like to admit, so they just need to hurry up and get together already.

3) RukiHime (Rukia x Orihime)

I adore these two together. Who needs girl hate and rivalry over the same guy when they can just be totally adorable together? Besides, it’s already canon that Rukia and Orihime care about each other quite a bit; hell, Rukia is the one who tells Orihime that she is strong and that she is important! And besides, Rukia literally crawled through her own blood trying to save Orihime. If that’s not shippy, then I don’t know what else it can be. So forget all the Orihime-bashing and Rukia-bashing; let’s let our girls love each other!

2) IchiHime (Ichigo x Orihime)

I know I might lose followers for this, but I absolutely love Ichihime (of course, not as much as my number one ship, but definitely a lot). Ichigo definitely cares a lot about Orihime, and Orihime has always loved Ichigo even before he gained his Shinigami powers. In fact, that moment when Ichigo literally came back to life to protect Orihime when he heard her crying out for him, that just sealed it for me. But there’s also the fact that Ichigo always becomes softer whenever he sees Orihime, he never scowls or frowns around her unless she’s in danger, and there’s also how Orihime is always so reassuring of Ichigo. They complement each other in their own ways and bring out the best in each other, and I’ll never grow tired of seeing them together.

1) ByaRen/RenBya (Renji x Byakuya)

Yes, this is my all-time favourite ship in Bleach. Funny thing, because I always like imagining angsty scenarios for them (then again, I’m a masochist, lol). I’ve always been a sucker for class-difference romances, so this isn’t too big of a surprise for me. I’ve always liked the image of high-class Byakuya falling in love with poor boy Renji, but there’s also the dynamics between them. Not just the class difference, but the fact that Byakuya is a captain and Renji is his lieutenant, so there is a power imbalance, for sure. Even then, Renji is everything that Byakuya needs; he’s passionate, loyal, caring, and a total sweetheart. The fateful hospital scene is what made me start shipping it, honestly, because it really establishes Renji’s loyalty to Byakuya and that he was willing to try and build a proper relationship with him as superior and subordinate. Sure, I think there were some rough patches for the both of them, mainly with Renji still being a little upset about being pinned to the spot with Kido before being nearly sliced and diced by Byakuya’s Bankai while Byakuya feels guilt for how he’d treated Renji up until then, but things worked out in the end and it eventually blossomed into a beautiful romance. Yeah, I’m kind of a romantic at heart.

[greeneyedsuccubunny]

The Art of Seduction 101

Summary: Natasha needs (y/n)'s help to seduce a mark on one of her mission's however (y/n) is confident she's the worst at seduction. So Natasha has decided to do a practice run before the big day with our one and only Winter Boo Bear. Will she make the grade? Warnings: Fluffy fluffy goodness. Major feels?

A.N. If enough people ask I will do a Part 2. Also if anyone would like to be tagged just ask. I love ya’ll.

"No fucking way!" You practically shouted at Natasha who was grinning evilly at you. "Yes fucking way perhaps literally if I teach you well enough....or if I can get you to tap into what's already there buried just underneath the surface." Natasha mused with a pensive look on her face giving a quick wink to you at her double meaning. "What the hell are you talking about Nat?" You sigh placing your index finger and thumb on the bridge of your nose pinching slightly to alleviate the pressure you knew was bound to become a migraine soon.

"Well I could teach...." Natasha began but you had too many things going on in your mind right now and you found your mind beginning to wander. It had been like this all morning Natasha had the brilliant idea of using you to seduce the mark in both her and Bucky's undercover operation. She had no other option it would seem considering the mark was one Sr. Antoine Alverez a drug cartel lord and all around scum bag known for trafficking in young women on the side for fun. He was known to be able to spot a lie a mile away so Nat knew she would need someone very skilled at lying. Someone like say another Avenger someone who is her best friend and owes her a favor for spilling red wine on her carpet. Someone like you. You had been going back and forth on this subject she was trying her very best speeches as well as her cute little puppy dog expressions to convince you to help her out. Apparently not only were you a skilled liar but your body and looks were very attuned to Sr. Alvarez's specifications, he had a type. With your luxurious (y/h/c) locks and stunning (y/s/c) skin not to mention your beautiful figure type was what he craved. You didn't mind at all helping her out on this if it was anything other than seducing someone. When you had joined the Avengers it had been under the assumption that you would be the agent behind the scenes using your mutant abilities only when it was deemed necessary. You hadn't ever thought they would ask you to seduce someone because the God's honest truth was you just didn't know how. You saw yourself as the quirky chick the one always with a funny joke not a sexual being that had men fall at your feet, that was Nat's job. You had definitely had sex before and you were quite good at it it's just you weren't the smolder type you were the type who if things got to tense would throw on a Borat impression call it 'the sexy time' saying 'I like' to reduce the awkardness. Long story short you weren't cut out for this shit. You remembered when Natasha had told you that you were exactly the type of girl that Alvarez wanted. Your reaction had been less than stellar when you mumbled out, "Oh freaking fantastic. Just what I need the one man in the world who truly wants me and he is a sick depraved bastard....thanks mom for the winning genes... you're a real peach." In truth, the only man that you did want was the guy you never thought even looked your way once. The beautiful man with Chestnut waves and ocean blue eyes that were so haunted and made your heart speed up fast and run slow at the same time. The man who could make the world feel like it is staying in place when he chuckled at your jokes which is why you sprinkled in extra quips when he was around. You thought if you could lighten up the load on this man's burdened shoulders if you could make his life a little better for even a split second then that's what you were going to do. Who is the man in question? That man is the one, the only, James Buchanaan Barnes. Though it seemed as if Bucky was maybe starting to warm up to you a little lately. Not that you would really notice if you didn't have a major crush on him. Bucky would try and skirt away from you every time you spent for than 10 minutes with him. You wanted to go so far as to tell him that you swear you didn't have cooties....and then you most definitely wanted to proceed that with licking his face, body, and di-...... "Snap out of it (y/l/n). You were daydreaming again." Natasha said while smirking at you. You knew she knew what and most likely who you were daydreaming about. "I'm sorry babe forgive me please repeat yourself and do go slow. My brain is turning into mush at the prospect of me having to keep my ass upright in hooker heels, while trying to pull off any assemblance of something resembling sex appeal." You pout trying to keep the nervous feeling in the pit of your stomach from showing up on your face. "I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted by you brain fucking Barnes. I could teach you how to be sexy and seduce. Believe me when I tell you a monkey could do it. You know that was most of what I did when I got out of the Red Room. Your hot babe I swear you can do this and I really need your help think of all the girls that you would be helping if you put this monster behind bars." Natasha explained in a cool demeanor while smirking at your blushing expression when she mentioned Bucky. "That is so not fair! I hate that your right.....What do I need to do?" You ask begrudgingly.

“Y-y-yeah. Nat." You swallow the large lump in your throat nervously. You begin patting down the curls on your head gently while smoothing out the flattering (y/f/c) dress that hugged your curves in all the right places. Natasha had picked out just the right pair of wedges after you had stumbled and fallen like a baby deer trying to stand up on it's own after being birthed. Apparently the heels women usually wore for this kinda thing were not your cup of tea after having almost broken your ankle in every pair Natasha forced you to try on. "I-I can’t do this. It-It’s not a good idea. You do sexy y-you not me I got the whole 'can control mother nature thing' down ya know?!” You stammer out while violently punctuating the air with your finger quotes. Natasha just stares at you blankly while you have a mild panic attack. "I don't got this! I repeat I don't got this!!!" You exclaim loudly while trying to steady your breathing that's when Natasha finally spoke up. "Y/n you are sexy I swear! I know Bucky he's a nice guy he would never do anything to make you feel bad about yourself. He is the perfect man to try out the seduction on he's agreed to help me fine tune you. If I do say so myself he was quite eager. He slapped Sam in the head and punched Steve in the shoulder while death glaring Tony with his Winter Smolder to get them to put their hands down when I asked who wanted to volunteer to see if (y/n) could seduce them." Natasha reassured you with her speech while quirking her eyebrow at your nervous antics. "He was probably just trying to be nice because he feels bad about thinking I have cooties." You mumble out in a defeated tone. "What?" Natasha questioned with a tick of her eyebrow confused by what you had said thinking she had to have heard you wrong. "Nothing. Never Mind. Just go back out there and get Steve I can't do this with Bucky." You answer quickly making a sweeping motion with your hands to indicate to get Bucky to go away. Silently praying anyone else in the world was out there for you to practice on. "Yeah--- about that (y/n) I kinda sent everyone else on their way out of the tower so you wouldn't feel so stressed when you seducded Barnes... I really didn't think you would mind this much I thought you might enjoy it in fact." Natasha proclaimed with a wince when she saw the terrified expression on your face. "Oh God, Natasha I am the freak with a bad complexion and extra wobbly bits! There is no way he is going to fall for me especially when he has seen you, and oh ya know, any girl in this damn building!" You whisper shout at Natasha trying to breathe deeply and evenly so you didn't pass out. "Barnes already has a thing for you I am sure of it." Natasha chirped out trying to keep you upbeat and positive about the situation at hand. "No he doesn’t! Stop lying to me." You snap at Natasha who quickly comes over to you squatting down and putting her hand on your cheeks. "(Y/n) look at me." Natasha prompted, causing you to look up at Natasha who had a soothing smile on her face. "Baby girl you're beautiful, you're timeless. I wouldn't have volunteered you for this if I didn't believe a 100% in my soul that you couldn't do this. Hell I would have you seduce me but I am already biased I would definitely sleep with you." Natasha winked at you and nudged you in the ribs gently with her elbow. "Really you would sleep with me? You queried with a soft chuckle trying to use a little comedy to lighten up the dread settling over you. "I most definitely would love bug. Now get out there and give him a trouser tent! Remember the lesson I taught you swing your hips, flip your hair out of your eyes, cock a side smile and sexy smirk. Really, you've mastered those moves already and those are all you need to know." She stated matter-of-factly. "Is this one of those this is who we are, this is what we do, and this is what you need to know Simba moments? If so I think I have a little red lipstick and it's not too late to draw a little mark on my forehead." You giggle at the serious expression changing to one of amusement on Nat's face as you're beginning to lighten the mood you had caused due to your self deprecation. "I mean what do you say you could probably lift me up you're really quite strong. After we could practice for Dirty Dancing?" You quip as Natasha shakes her head, her red curls shaking with her laughter. "You know what we could try it as soon as you show me what you can do out there. It's show time Baby Girl!" Natasha exclaims excitedly fluffing your hair correcting the little slip up of red lipstick on the corner of your lips and pushing you with a firm shove out the door and into the Break room.

Bucky Barnes was a picture of perfection and calmness sitting in the break room. At least he appeared that way thanks to his Winter Solider days. He found it easier to school his emotions because of the programming that Hydra had done. The malicious trigger words were out of his brain now but some of the aspects of his training like his control still stayed with him. 

Little did you know but Bucky was a trillion times more of a nervous wreck than you were at the moment.  Sitting and waiting for you to 'make his day' as Natasha had put it. He was still a little hazy on the details except that it involved you and anything that involved you and or helped you he wanted to be a part of. If he was honest with himself he'd do anything for you, with you.....and to you. This feeling inside of his heart wasn't anything he was familiar with. Sure he had been with quite a few women in fact he had been quite the ladies man in his day. Those women were the cat and mouse kind of women though. He was always the one being pursued for a relationship that he never wanted in the end... but not this time. This time he wanted the woman more than anything he'd ever wished for in his entire life. He tried to talk to Steve about it and after recounting the way he felt he came up with a few points to talk about to Steve like the fact that his stomach would try to wiggle away from him when he saw you smile or how his heart pounded out it's own unique rhythm every time he heard her laugh. His best friend had concluded with a wide smile and a hearty chuckle that Bucky had major feelings for (y/n). He had explained that what Bucky had described was the exact way he felt when Peggy was around back in the day. Hearing this Bucky put a hand on his favorite punk's shoulder giving him a reassuring smile and telling him that he knew and she would always be with Steve no matter what. Bucky had been running away from (y/n) for as long as he could remember. The thing was when he tried his hardest he could stick it out for about ten minutes before her smile, her smell, hell even her voice made him want to kiss her and caress her beautiful face. Honestly, he was definitely not the best person to see if (y/n) had the seduction chops considering he was already head over heels with (y/n) in the damn first place. She could punch him in the arm while calling him bro and pounding a beer can shotgun style and he wouldn't give a fuck. She was perfect to him with her quick wit, always defusing the situation with a joke. He couldn't even count the number of times that she had single handedly stopped Tony and Steve from coming to blows over some minor problem with a well timed 'that's what she said'. She had told him once that when someone's mind goes to funny sexcapades in an argument it throws off their shitty thoughts for a split second. Enough time to get the tension to lift a bit and that's when you are able to strike and separate the dueling parties according to her, Bucky always listened to her. Damn, this is what the songs on the radio always talked about. Fuck all the songs were starting to make sense now. Did this mean that he.... loved you? Bucky is sitting there waiting and pondering if someone like you could ever love someone like him when out comes (y/n) stumbling from what looks like a push from behind. Quickly gathering her wits and composure she straightens up cocks her hip a little while tugging her lower lip gently between her teeth and cocking her eyebrow slightly. Deep inside she knows she is trying to mirror an old cover photo of Cosmopolitan with Scarlett Johansson on it. She took long languid steps as Nat taught her not looking at Bucky yet because she knew she would definitely see him trying not to laugh at her and that would cause her to run away. She felt like she was playing dress up in her mother's clothes but she had to do this for not only Natasha but herself she was gonna prove to herself she could do this. So without further ado she looked up and the look on Bucky's face confused you more than you could even express. Wait a minute. What was that expression? Was it.......................... A.N. I am the Queen of cliffhangers my friend's. I love you guys I had a day off of work so I decided to write a little something. If I get enough asks I will do a part 2 . So to see what the damn expression on Bucky's face is just ask Mwah! 

@prettyyoungtragedy @champion-ofthe-☀️ @dragoste-lunes@theinsomniacsblog @thiccmillions @jumpingmanatee@markusstraya@inumorph @groovytyphoonbouqett @nat-1-2@maggyme13@feelmyroarrrr@frenchfrostpudding @geeksareunique@wanna-see-my-lease @frozen540 @mummy-woves-you

[arkhamcitysirens]

Hey I wanted to start watching gotham but... everyone seems to hate the riddler??? lmao you watch gotham right wtf is wrong with riddler on gotham? what has he done? why does everyone think he's so bad

hey i’m your local shameless gotham stan and i think it gets a lot of undeserved hate. partially because people can’t cope with such a weird alternate universe but also… it has its problems and the show is definitely disliked for a reason. case in point: gotham’s terrible presentation of edward nygma. personally i loved edward early in season one, but at this point he’s probably become the worst depiction of any well-known dc character that gotham has given us.

-for starters, eddie’s gotham origin story is much more ridiculous and creepy than the origin of the riddler we know and love. in most universes, the riddler’s origin story usually revolves around his love for puzzles and his need for intellectual superiority, founded when he was a child as a result of his father’s abuse and mistreatment. however in gotham, he evolves into the riddler essentially because a girl doesn’t love him back, with nothing from his original character except his vague love for weak puzzles off the internet in tact. the fact a character with such excellent source material is reduced to a character whose motivations lie entirely in winning over a woman is something that understandably infuriates a lot of fans.

-gotham!eddie is a creepy stalker and the show makes it seem like his behaviour is okay. he obsesses over a woman who repeatedly tells him no. he follows her around constantly, tracking her movements, learning everything he can about her from the shadows, and it’s painted as cute and quirky. his actions are threatening and predatory, and should be shown as such. it’s disturbing how this is romanticised into a sob story for eddie, because this woman doesn’t love him back. his behaviour should be presented as horrific and endangering for her, and instead we’re invited to the edward nygma pity party, told to believe the woman is in the wrong.

-his character’s appeal is mostly the actor’s good looks. the actor, cory michael smith, is undeniably attractive, meaning he’s highly popular on the show amongst casual fans. it also means the writers often don’t put any effort into characterisation or genuine development because people are happy with the hot nerd archetype eddie fills.

-a HUGE issue with his character is the portrayal of his mental illness. the riddler canonly has severe obsessive compulsive disorder, but this is never mentioned or acknowledged. instead the writers went with a non-specific split personality disorder, which has never been attributed to edward before. that isn’t really the problem though, although the ocd erasure isn’t cool; the bigger issue is that his identity disorder is treated like it’s what makes eddie inherently evil. the show barely gives any time or thought to eddie’s identity disorder, outside of displaying him as being crazy and dangerous because of it and then becoming a Bad Guy. gotham pushes the casual idea that mental illness makes a person evil and sick, using the split personality narrative as a plot device, and erasing eddie’s obsessive compulsive disorder for something deemed to have more shock value.

-this isn’t really a fair point, but fandom interpretation has often characterised eddie as gay (hell to the yes), autistic, and other things which aren’t presented in the show. because these things aren’t canon, the writers are under no obligation to present them like they probably should have with canon things like his ocd, but it still frustrates a lot of fans (myself included) to see a character often interpreted as part of the mlm community turned into the very definition of a straight white cis fuckboy.

-he’s just not the riddler? nothing about his title of ‘the riddler’ feels authentic and he barely tries with the puzzles and games his entire theme revolves around. the riddles he uses are literally taken straight off internet. i’m not even kidding. the writers put so little effort in that the viewers probably know the solution to the riddle immediately. this version of edward nygma doesn’t actually pose a real threat to anybody, much less the entire city of gotham.

in my personal opinion, gotham overall is a show worth giving a shot, although gotham!riddler isn’t great. it is deeply flawed and deserving of its many criticisms, but i think people have exaggerated quite how bad it is. as long as you’re aware that gotham has done things wrong, you’ll probably enjoy it. don’t let public opinion sway you on whether or not you like the show.

[completetrashforyou]

Super(gay)Girl Review 2x12

Welcome back to the following installment of reviews on the gayest television show on the planet

LET’S GAY IT ON

1.  LENA AND KARA ARE ACTUAL GIRLFRIENDS

OH MY GOD??? DONUTS??? FLOWERS??? THE LACK OF HESITATION ON BOTH SIDES TO SAVE THE OTHER’S LIFE???

-this has officially been the best valentines day ever.

yes, I know I am not the one whom received an office full of flowers but this, Valentines Day 2017, is the happiest I’ve ever had because KARA DANVERS RECEIVED AN OFFICE FULL OF FLOWERS FROM LENA LUTHOR.

I MEAN, CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT HER COWORKERS WERE THINKING??? THEY PROBABLY SMIRKED AND ASSUMED IT WAS SOME GUY TRYING TO WOO HER BUT NO, IT WAS LENA. 

(we have a romantic in our hands oh my)

-EVEN AFTER WATCHING THE CCTV  FOOTAGE MAGGIE SHOWED OF LENA WITH KRYPTONITE, KARA STILL STOOD HER GROUND AND GRANTED HER THE OPPORTUNITY TO EXPLAIN HERSELF AND SAY HER PIECE.

dead. metallo-level dead. 

I appreciate and loved that part so much. To witness Kara have so much faith in her surges me with hope and a really happy feeling. I can only imagine how Lena must feel to finally have someone look at her for her and not a tainted image of her family name.

Speaking of Lena...

Listen, this strong woman actually IMPRISONED her own mother after she nearly obliterated all the aliens. She grew to resent, but still secretly want, the woman she had no choice but to call her mother. Lena’s basically spent her entire life wiping her Lillian’s footsteps from ever affecting her own path and HERE SHE IS VISITING HER IN JAIL AFTER KARA SIMPLY TOLD HER “SHE IS STILL YOUR MOM”. ((whipped))

- “I spent most of my life wishing I could talk to people that are no longer here.”

There was a softness in Lena’s eyes when Kara said this (I melted). Her thought process must’ve been: wow, this person in front of me is my friend and she’s opening up to me about her tumultuous past is this real life(?)

SHE LOOKED SO GENUINELY TAKEN BY KARA’S EMOTIONS IT’S AS IF IT’S THE FIRST TIME SHE’S EVER WITNESSED SOMEBODY OPENING UP TO HER. MY PRECIOUS DONUT SO VULNERABLE AND IN LOVE.

-Lena crying out “DON’T HURT HER!” 

...she...she was on the verge of tears... so afraid for Supergirl’s life...that she actually forgot about her own life...her own HUMAN life...

I’m not even going to comment on that scene. I know y’all screamed your asses off like I did (I also laughed because how extra can she get lmfao)

-”That’s what friends are for”

I’m sorry but Kara is not subtle ONE BIT of how attracted she is to Lena.

Ladies, the fact that she had to justify that she’s doing it because she’s “a friend” I don’t know, six times in the entire episode, says enough. What a gay mess the Danvers’ sisters are. 

Can’t wait to see their mom’s reaction when she learns that both of her daughters, indeed, are too gay to function.

-that last scene

Not gonna lie, I got sort of nervous there. There are so many different ways to interpret the ominous music and the strange look in Lena’s eyes as she observed the white knight chess piece. All I’m going to say about this is: I hope she will sought to bring revenge to her mom and not actually JOIN her.

I mean, it’s entirely possible! HER MOM LITERALLY FLED TO SAVE HER OWN LIFE AND LEFT HER TO DIE ON THE FLOOR AFTER BEING KNOCKED OUT BY CYBORG HANK HENSHAW. IF IT WEREN’T FOR SUPERGIRL, SHE’D BE FRIED ALONG WITH METALLO 

2. Sanvers= A Couple That Needs To Be The Basis For LGBTQUI Relationships On TV

My honey’s, so happy and bashful and so fucking attractive when they work together holy shit.

At first, I didn’t really like how clipped that scene was of Alex introducing Maggie as her girlfriend. I wanted it to be longer, more profound (because Lord knows I would rather watch a 13 hour episode of Sanvers literally just playing board games and reading than see Mon-El and Kara spin around in circles at their pathetic excuse for a relationship).

But then, after pondering, I realized that again, the writers did justice to them. The whole nonchalant attitude, just congratulating Alex, hugging her, proceeding to play a game of pool, I l o v e d t h a t. Sexuality shouldn’t be the main focus or come as a shock anymore, its 2017 to all you closeminded fucktards, PEOPLE WILL LOVE PEOPLE NO MATTER WHAT THEIR ORIENTATION OR LABEL. WE ARE ONLY LIVING THE FREEDOM WE WERE BORN WITH.

You know what I also loved? When J’onn said

“It wasn’t for me to say”

(or something like that) when they asked him why he didn’t say anything despite already knowing how head over heels Alex was (and is) for Maggie. It showed importance. How a person’s coming out journey and life journey in general is up to them. It’s in their control of who they want to reveal it to and when.

J’onn J’onzz, an actual space dad everyone wants to have.

3. SO, when do the ugly aliens take the coconut away and reveal his true identity because I’m sick of all this merry-go-round business.

It’s sad that Melissa has to adhere to reducing her beautiful character, Kara, to what’s happening with Mon-El. She herself said that she wanted Supergirl to be a show more about the journey for Kara as a person, no relationships attached. Less of that monochrome, typical crap you find on all other media.

I just find it ridiculous how, after Kara heard that he’s been blabbering on about her while on a date with a different girl, she’s just going to kiss him and neglect everything else that’s happened between them beforehand? The emotional roller coaster he put her through and IS STILL putting her through? SINCE WHEN WAS KARA THAT DISMISSIVE OF HER ACTIONS AND THE CONSEQUENCES THAT WOULD COME WITH THEM

I get he’s cute and all and the concept of the both of them getting together is somehow appealing because, naturally, Daxamites and Kryptonians hate each other, but I just don’t like it. It isn’t my overwhelming gayness for Supercorp that’s the cause of this opinion, trust me. It’s simply the message that the show want’s to represent and how they’re doing the complete opposite. 

Supergirl is a show of powerful women, not women whom constantly need a love interest to stay relevant and become “content” with their lives.

THE VERDICT

A SOLID 8/10.

The growth of Lena and Kara’s relationship was elaborated and portrayed so beautifully in this episode. I was entranced with the flashbacks of Lena’s past, giving us an understanding of why and how one could grow to hate so much the person they’re supposed to love unconditionally.

Not to mention how passionate the both of them (Kara and Lena) are for each other c:

I absolutely am not too keen about Kara and Mon-El. I think he should go back to where he came from or at least tell the truth about who he is already because Kara is just going to get hurt again and tbh, the girl needs a  donut break with her girlfriend hehe break from him (like why the hell was he even at the DEO the fuck). They’ve been hinting on Mon-El being more than what he presumes to be in the past few episodes right? When will they finally follow through with it so Kara and him can stop going to each other to discuss the same trucking issue every damn time.

To show some appreciation for the men in the show (not the immature douche bag who’s motto in life is ‘swipe right ‘till you find the right one), Winn is great as always, hilarious, but James and Kara’s scenes were winner for this episode too. They’re slowly making progress. Kara is slowly accepting that her best friend is as passionate about saving lives as she is, no matter how dangerous. And James is helping her to wrap her head around that by earning her trust. I missed them, glad to have them back.

As for Sanvers... well right now I’m just wondering when they’ll get married because matching leather jackets??? Playing pool with each other’s friends??? BINCH THEY’RE WORKING TOGETHER NOW, MAGGIE IS ALWAYS AT THE DEO HELPING THEM WITH THEIR CASES AND IM LIVINGGGGGGGGGGGG

TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK, PLEASE?