#I hate my kitchen I’m literally cooking this on the FLOOR because the stove outlet doesn’t work

[bluestockingbaby]

goofed up the chicken slow cooker marsala recipe, we’ll see if it turns out good anyway.

[queerbutstillhere-writes]

Day 5: Quarantine

- You can't come over tomorrow.

~ what do you mean? "Can't"?

- Gotham is on quarantine. Mandatory. Only medical personel allowed out. Hell, even the JL grounded us.

• I'm seeing can't, but hearing "help me please"

- guys. This is serious.

• for you, maybe. Timmie, we can't get sick from Covid. Kon is alien, and my metabolism is just too fast for it.

- Bart..

~ he's right, Tim.

- Do not encourage him, Kon.

- you two are not allowed to come.

Tim sighed, staring at his laptop monitor. He’d been stuck in quarantine for several days now. Alone in his apartment. He could probably suit up and hightail it across town to get to the manor if he wanted, but being quarantined alone sounded far more appealing then bring quarantined in the manor with his siblings. Dick would probably drag him into nightly board (read: bored) games, Bruce would be constantly trying to bond, Damian would probably never stop insulting him. Duke and Cass would probably be fine, but Duke was easily roped into Dick's shenanigans, and Cass had that habit of creeping up on you.

No. Tim would survive being stuck alone, working on case files and reading news headlines. Today's news was singing the praises of Wayne Enterprises for their massive donations to research centers, the city, and for them paying for housing and healthcare for homeless. They were also praising Bruce for personally paying for the Covid testing and for paying for food and housing costs for those who couldn't afford it. Bruce had enough money to do so, so he might as well, right?

Amusingly, Tim had seen a headline from Star City about Red Hood and Arsenal highjacking a supply truck full of toilet paper and medical supplies and redistributing it among the poor and homeless, as well as stealing from some stores and making care packages for the homeless.

But now, his idiot boyfriends, severely upsetted by the fact that their Thursday date night had been cancelled, were texting and calling him non-stop, trying to convince him to let them come, finding out if he needed anything ("do you have food?" "Yes, Kon." "I'm talking real food, Tim. Not some Rice Krispies and a few boxes of cereal." "Conner."), and constantly fretting over him. Did he mention they kept whining about missing date night? Well they did. Even the suggestion that they could still hang out with each other didn't appease them. ("But we need our Robin! Our birdie!")

Tim Drake was a smart man. He was a good detective. If he had been at the manor, he'd probably be working with Bruce to develop faster testing, or figure out cures. But what Tim forgot, is how truly, truly, dumb his boyfriends are.

So he really shouldn't have been surprised to hear his door open on Thursday evening.

But yet, he was.

He shot up off his sofa, spinning towards the door. He hadn't changed in a day, and probably hadn't showered in three. His apartment was a mess and honestly he didn't remember what he had for breakfast that day. But yet he grabbed the nearest thing to him, an empty metal waterbottle, and brandished it as a weapon.

"Oh, I'm so scared," a chipper voice said, with a laugh.

"Bart?!" Tim exclaimed, half in shock and anger.

Standing in the entry way of his apartment was Bart Allen and Conner Kent. Conner was carrying several bags of groceries, and Bart had a couple jugs of milk and juice.

"What are you two doing?!" Tim hissed, glaring.

"Uh, visiting, duh?"

Bart zipped to the fridge, putting up his jugs, and then dumping a backpack that Tim hadn't noticed earlier onto the floor.

"Bart," Tim said, his tone dropping to his more commanding, Robin voice.

He noted Kon was also carrying a duffel bag. The man just smiled and then turned to walk into the kitchen.

"Nonono, I know what's going on here, you two aren't staying."

"Why not? We can't get it, and you're just gonna . . ." Bart motioned at the messy living room. "Besides, what if we quarantine ourselves with you."

"Well, because! Because. . . " Tim scowled at him.

He was starting to lose his energy to argue. And he was getting pretty lonely. And this . . . He wasn't wrong either. They could just quarantine together. . . 

"And also, now if you need something, one of us can just zip over to metropolis and pick it up, or go do laundry at Clark and Lo's," Kon called from the kitchen.

"And if you do get sick! You'll have us to look after you!" Bart exclaimed, zipping over and kissing Tim before he could protest.

Tim glared at him from just a few inches away, then at Conner, who had moved to the doorway. They both just grinned at him.

"Fine. Fine! You can stay!" He exclaimed, defeated.

Bart whooped and kissed Tim again.

"Okay, first things first. You need to take a shower, man," Bart told him, wrinkling his nose. "Or else no cuddles."

Tim, touch starved as always, found himself immediately hating that idea.

"Also, we need to clean this place up. So, you go shower and brush your teeth and shave and stuff - or don't shave - and Kon and I will clean up and start supper!"

Tim huffed at him, but obeyed, heading towards the bathroom, stopping by Conner first to give him a quick kiss. Kon just grinned and pulled him in close, tweaking Tim's nose before kissing him. Then he shoved Tim towards the bathroom.

He went through the bedroom first, snagging some clean clothes, and then went into the bathroom. He quickly stripped and showered, making sure to clean his hair thoroughly, he shaved when he got out, and quickly brushed his teeth as instructed, because frankly, he didn't remember the last time he had done that and didn't want to make his boyfriends deal with that. 

When he got back out, admittedly feeling a little better, he noted Bart and Kon's bags on his bed. He just sighed and shook his head, walking back to the main room. He could already smell the tomatoey scents of Italian food, and wondered what all those two had actually brought with them. There was some form of pop music playing, and he could hear Bart happily singing along to it, Kon chiming in occasionally with the choruses. Tim chuckled and looked around the living room. 

They had cleaned up trash and dishes and fixed the pillows on the sofa. The curtains had been opened, and a candle was burning on the coffee table and all the glasses and mugs and plates had been removed. Tim walked over and leaned against the kitchen doorway, watching Bart dart around and cook, while Kon washed dishes.

"This that hot girl bummer anthem. Turn it up and throw a tantrum~" Bart sang, doing a little dance as he darted from the fridge back to the stove, throwing a few things into a sauce.

"What are you making?" Tim asked softly, but they both heard him.

"Hey! He's clean!" Bart announced cheerfully. "And I am making lasagna! Max's special recipe."

Tim hummed in response, grinning back at the speedster.

"So are you two going to eat me out of house and home by the end of tomorrow, or?"

Kon shot Tim a smirk. "Depends."

"Ugh, Kent! I meant food!"

Conner laughed, rinsing one last dish before drying his hands, walking over and pulling Tim up against his front.

"I never said that wasn't what I meant, did I?"

"No. . . But with you there's always some kind of innuendo."

Kon huffed in mock annoyance, before ducking his head and gently kissing Tim a few times. Tim tilted his face up and obliged, wrapping his arms around Kon's neck.

"I missed you," Kon mumbled lightly, his hands sneaking up Tim's soft cotton shirt that may or may not have belonged to Kon at some point.

"I missed you too," Tim responded instinctually, not really realizing exactly how true that was.

"Then why didn't you let us come sooner?" Bart's voice asked and then he was slipping between their arms, sandwiching himself between them.

Tim laughed, giving the pouting Bart a few kisses, turning him from pouty Bart to smiley Bart.

"Because I didn't want you guys getting sick."

"Tim we literally can't."

"Did you confirm that?"

"Yeah. I called Lex and asked. And you know as well as I do that Bart can't get sick from these things."

Tim sighed, looking down at Bart, then up at Kon. "Well either way, it's too late now."

Once the lasagna was in the oven, Bart made Tim help him finish cleaning, sweeping floors and dusting things, meanwhile Kon just sat by and gave unhelpful commentary and got occasionally whacked with cleaning supplies. Once the apartment was properly cleaned, and feeling much better, they decided to properly move Bart and Kon into Tim's room, even though they had stated they'd probably be leaving to get more clothes and such. And probably their dogs. 

Tim sat on his bed and watched them unpack bathroom supplies and clothes and other various personal items. Phone chargers got plugged in his few remaining wall outlets and things got shoved into previously neat areas.

"Were you really gonna stay here all by your lonesome?" Bart asked, flopping down onto the bed next to Tim and idly bumping his thigh with his knee.

"It wouldn't have been forever, Bart. I was probably gonna go to the manor eventually."

"Ew, and be around your brothers?"

"They are my family, Bart."

"I know but still. . . "

Tim chuckled and shook his head fondly, moving to lay partially over Bart and softly kiss him.

"Wait, is Keystone even in quarantine yet?"

"Uhhh." Bart grinned sheepishly.

"Bartholomew!"

Bart just giggled a little. "I'm sorry, but I wanted to come too!"

Tim just shook his head and then dropped it to Bart's chest, laying on him and listening to his breathing.

"Hey, this looks like a cuddle pile in the making."

Both of them groaned when Kon flopped - gently - on top of Tim. 

"Kon you big lug! Get off!" Tim whined, pushing up on his hands and knees, trying to dislodge Kon, who didn't move.

"Why, I thought you liked cuddle piles?" Kon giggled out, nuzzling at Tim's neck and causing him to squeak.

"Not when I'm being squished!"

Kon gave an over dramatic groan, but moved, rolling and pulling them both on top of him. It took a bit of squirming before they were comfortable, one on either side of Kon, heads on his shoulder, hands clasped on top of his stomach. They laid there and chatted idly, with no concern for anything that might interrupt their lives.

"Bart the oven is going off."

And just like that, Bart was gone. A couple seconds passed, then he was back, snuggling right up against Kon again.

"Where were we?"

Both Kon and Tim just started laughing.

Once dinner was ready, they sat on the sofa and binged a couple episodes of Broadchurch before settling into another cuddle pile. Their default form was cuddle pile. Then eventually Bart got bored with sitting still, so they turned on Mario Kart, played a few normal rounds to watch Kon and Bart suffer, then Tim turned on the mod he had made to make the game go super fast. 

He had learned not to watch the screen while this was happening. That's how you got eye damage.

"I'm gonna go do a little patrolling," Kon said, standing after Bart had beat him, again.

"Oh. Okay. Be careful, give a call if you need any help," Tim said, looking up from his laptop.

"Yeah, if I need anything, I'll call Bart."

"Kon."

"Hey, you're grounded, remember?"

Tim sighed, stretching up so Kon could kiss him. Kon chuckled and did so, then bent over the back of the sofa to kiss Bart, before disappearing into the bedroom to change. Then he called a goodbye on the way out the window. Tim and Bart looked at each other.

"So what are we doing then?"

Tim shrugged vaguely and looked back at his laptop.

"Well I'm gonna keep playing my game then."

"Okay."

Bart left him alone for a solid twenty minutes, which was a bit of a record for him, then he was tugging on Tim's laptop, trying to steal it.

"Yes, Bart?"

"I wanna cuddle."

"Cuddle?"

Bart's silence cause Tim to look over, and found he was pouting. Tim chuckled and saved his files, setting the laptop on the floor, then moving so his back was on an armrest, and opened his arms for Bart. Bart practically dove forwards, laying between Tim's legs, head on his chest, arms around his stomach. Tim chuckled and adjusted a bit for his own comfort, then let himself relax with Bart.

Eventually they turned on a movie and just laid together, idly chatting. There would be plenty of time for work later, Tim decided. But for now, he'd spend time with Bart. He may be stuck with these two for months before restrictions laxed, but he would take every moment he could, just to spend time with them while he could.

Kon got back after a few hours, stumbling back through the window, and giving them a grin, but he didn't come over, just walked away into the bathroom, leaving the scent of soot and acid in his wake.

"He's stinky," Bart remarked, still laying on Tim's chest.

"Hmmn, stinky boy."

Bart sniggered. Tim had, at some point, set his laptop on Bart's ass and was still working. Was it the most effective or romantic? No. But Bart didn't mind and it was keeping Tim from getting bored. 

Then his phone started ringing.

"Bart, grab that for me please?"

Bart quickly grabbed the phone from the coffee table before immediately settling back into place.

"Yello?"

"Hey, Timmy."

"Hi Dick, what's up?"

"Nothing, just wanted to check in and see how things were going with you."

Tim glanced down at Bart.

"I'm okay."

"Yeah? Just hanging out and working on cases, I assume?"

"Yeah, I'm working on that March case."

Dick hummed from across the line.

"Well, are you sure you don't want to come to the manor?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. Honestly I'm surprised you're there. I thought you'd be with Wally?"

There was a pause. 

"I was going to, but he got directly exposed the day before he was supposed to come down, and he didn't want to risk it until he discovered if speedsters could actually catch it."

"Hmmn, I have it on good authority they can't."

"Is that so?"

"Yup."

"They're there with you, aren't they?"

Tim just grinned, even though Dick couldn't see it. His brother laughed.

"Tim, you scoundrel."

"Listen, I told them no, they wouldn't listen to me, and then when they showed up, it was too late because Bart like, immediately kissed me."

"Hell yeah I did."

Dick just laughed again. Tim could envision him fondly shaking his head.

"So, I'll let you go then, I'm sure you guys have some catching up to do, if you know what I mean."

"Oh my god, shut up," Tim laughed out, even as he started playing with Bart's hair.

"Just speaking the truth!"

"Goodbye, Dick."

"Bye, Timmy! Love you, stay safe!"

"You too!"

Tim hung up the phone and let it fall to the ground beside the sofa.

"Oh good, you're off. I didn't want to come do this with your brother still on the phone."

Tim tilted his head back to see a shirtless Kon standing over him, grinning, hair still dripping slightly from his shower. He bent down and deeply kissed Tim. Tim gave a surprised noise and reached a hand up, resting it on Kon's jaw. When he pulled away, leaving Tim breathless, he just grinned mischievously, then moved so he was closer to Bart.

"Bartie."

"Hmmn?" When the ginger picked his head up, Kon kissed him the same.

Bart just grinned at him after, and put his head back on Tim's chest.

"Do you guys want a snack, because I'm starving."

Tim watched Kon walk away, and just had to laugh.

It was lucky the three of them were huge cuddlers, because otherwise they would not have fit in Tim's queen sized bed. Not with Kon's huge shoulders. After their snacks, Bart had to literally steal Tim's laptop, and then Kon decided to carry him to the bathroom to get ready for bed, instead of just letting him walk.

As the three of them laid in bed, a few minutes later, more focused on lazily kissing then actually sleeping, Tim decided that if he was going to be quarantined anywhere, being in his apartment with his amazing, dumb, loving boyfriends couldn't be the worst solution. And it was, by far, preferable over going to the manor. So he would happily keep his mouth shut and let them fret over him. Because he loved them. And they loved him.

@core-disaster-week-2020 originally written for @unknownunseenunheard !!

[god-hunter]

In Finding a New Normal

This one’s gonna be shorter I think.  I’ve pretty much exhausted my feelings about my 5 year girl and my Dancing girl.

Since last Sunday I’ve been on an incredibly panic-inducing search for new places to live.  The websites are so easy, with just 1-click automatic e-mails.  The rush is real.  I clicked on so many places, and about 8 got back to me, within the week!!!

Place #1

That Sunday I went to the first place and it was way too small.  The price was right, everything was included, but good God.  No way.  It was a tiny kitchen, that led right into a bedroom that would’ve been literally all bed.  It could fit a TV on top of a dresser.  And... that's it.  A little bathroom in the back.  The place looked grimy.  This was a no.

Place #2

This one I was more excited about.  The pictures looked pretty promising.  There was a front foyer, a decent looking little kitchen, and a nice sized bedroom/living area.

The reality however was not what I expected.  This apartment had the unique feature of allowing you the downstairs and the upstairs, however...  the downstairs was literally the foyer, which is right by the front door and then this small kitchen with barely any counter space to do your thing.  Then you go upstairs and even that’s awkward as the railing is right next to the wall.  You can’t actually grip the rail.

Anyway, once up top, it seemed like there were 2 closets to put your stuff, but instead they were more like attic storage.  You’d have to crawl in it, to grab your boxes or whatever.  Neither could serve as an actual closet with the structure of the roof.  It was triangular or “cape” as they call it.  There were big windows with lots of natural light and I liked the color scheme, however when I tried to go near the window and admire the view, my Head was touching the fucking ceiling!!!

This was already a no for me.  Forget the Bathroom, which was just okay in my opinion.  (Also, there was single driveway parking off of a Main St and another couple living on the property in the back part of the house or whatever.  So I became more concerned with the logistics of having to move cars, or just deal with bullshit like leaving to work on a busy street every day.)

Place #3

That night, I checked out another place that I was excited about.  The pictures depicted a nice clean, simple apartment with this white, gray and blue color scheme and I really dug it.  The location was also closer to my parents, and I was really starting to like this idea.  

Honestly, when I saw the place I liked it a lot.  It had a large bedroom, a nice kitchen, the bathroom was very clean and good looking, but the living room area was tiny.  It could fit a couch and a TV.  I wasn’t sure if it could really fit my desk which is so important to me.  Let alone my bookshelf which is a bonus, but I’ve got a lot of comics. 

 I was starting to learn what was important to me as I checked out these places.  Either way, I told them the truth.  I was looking at a lot of places, but I really liked what I saw.  How soon did they need an answer?

These guys needed one tomorrow...  They want someone to move in by 3/1.  That was a little soon for me, at first, but I was like, “Okay...”

I asked about their pet policy and it was a strict “no cats”.  Which is fine, for now.  I don’t have any pets.  But one day I’m gonna want a cat again.

Place #4

The same realtor showed me another place across town.  It’s almost not worth talking about because I hated it.  The town and neighborhood were fine, but... this property didn’t look too great.  I wasn’t thrilled with the ghetto looking backyard.

This place had an absentee landlord and 3 other tenants in this shared house.  All Men in their 40′s.  I kind of liked this idea actually as I’m 34...  Each tenant has their own Private Entrance, so technically we wouldn’t really be dealing with each other.  But there was shared usage of the backyard, so who knows?  Definitely a possibility to hang in the back and grill in the same space or whatever.  Have a beer with each other, or deal with friends in one area, while others wanted to do something else.

But I didn’t even have to worry about any of that, because the bedroom was pretty small, the living room was big, the kitchen was nice enough, but... I just didn’t like the feel.  Also, you could hear neighbors through the walls.

So Nope!

Place #5

This one, I recall seeing the pictures and going, “Hmmm... Why not?  I could make this work...” and when I saw the actual place physically, I actually felt medium about it!

Not as good as Place #3, but better than all the rest.  

Opening the door was a straight shot upstairs, to which there was a very nice sized kitchen.  Decent closet for linens or kitchen stuff.  There were built in drawers on 2 sides of a short wall that could serve as extra storage/built-in dresser for a bedroom.  Above that could've been the center piece for my Record Player or something.

But was the place big enough for my desk?  How big of a bed could I really have there comfortably, without eating up the whole bedroom?

Bedroom was kind of small.  Living room was bigger, but couldn’t fit my nice Kitchen Table.  It came with it’s own small round one though, and I could’ve totally made that work.

I wanted to think on this one...

Place #6

WAY too small!  lol

It was a Studio, so when I saw the pictures, I kinda knew what I was in for, but the big draw was that I could have 1 pet.  So how much was I willing to sacrifice for this Future Cat?

I got in there.  Private back entrance, access to a beautiful backyard...  Two plusses.

But then, you immediately see this low hanging duct which goes across the whole apartment from wall-to-wall.  It looms above the sink and stove, and I’m a big guy.  So doing dishes, and cooking would have to be done while crouching...  Very fucking uncomfortable.

Forget everything else!  The bathroom was nice, there were 2 closets!  Room for a bed, but not a couch, but a nice spot for my TV.  I could maybe fit my bookshelf, probably not my desk.  Or sacrifice one for the other.  Definitely could fit my Table.  But it didn’t matter.

That Duct was NOT gonna happen.  I laughed with the realtor and instead we talked about the possibility of Condos/Co-ops.

She educated me a little bit about my income and actual chances of getting stuff and I really appreciated it.

Place #7

This one was an unexpected turn-up.  My co-worker had seen how hard I was working on finding new places and she brought up that her Uncle was renovating an apartment that I should look at.

I was like, “Alright, let me know when it’s ready. I’d love to see it.”

Once she saw how many calls I was getting and that I was marking out the rest of my week she was like, “Oh, you can see it nooow...”

So, I did.  And I fucking LOVED it.

This place is huge.  Private Entrance.  Direct to the upstairs.  Once up there, there’s a kitchen on your right.  A decent bed-room on the other side of it.

Then I saw a Master Bedroom and a large Living Room!

Holy Shit, this was a 2-Bedroom.  And it could fit everything!!  I could tell.  I was so floored. The price was comparable to what me and my lady are paying now, so...  for just one person, I’m a little worried, but also, my parents hooked me up with help for the year.  [I’m not a mooch though.  I’m gonna find a better job in order to live within my means.  Or a roommate...]

But yeah.  This quickly became a no brainer.  There was a portable dishwasher in the kitchen, washer/dryer access in the basement.  Down the stairs and private back outside access to the basement to get in there, but whatever.  They’re 2 big machines that I get to use??  I am IN.

Here are the cons though.

1. It’s a very small bathroom.  Like, a hallway.  The wall is right in front of the toilet.  But, he’s planning on fixing that, and moving the toilet 4 inches closer to the wall behind it.  That’ll give more leg room and make a difference.

2. It’s not ready yet.  He needs 2 months for all the changes he wants to make.  He wants to add more outlets to make some rooms more convenient, which is redoing wiring and stuff.  [He’s a retired electrical engineer, so he’s into this stuff.]. He wants to move that toilet.  He wants to redo the carpets and paint.

Hell, I told him I’d help paint!  But he was like, “No no, I have a guy that he call and he’s very quick.  So I’ll just do that.”  I also brought up, “If there’s things you want to do while I’m in there, you’re welcome to work on stuff and I’ll be in a different room.  That doesn’t bother me...”

But he was like, “Yeah, but... this kind of work is hard to do when someone is living in there with all of their stuff around.”

So I could tell he wasn’t comfortable with me moving in sooner than 2 months, and I didn’t press him.

3. He doesn't want to sign a lease... Immediately I thought this is an illegal apartment.  It threw me way off.  You have to protect yourself.  I need guarantees.  Honestly, I really just want something in writing saying that I’m moving in in April.  So it’s definite and we can make this a thing.

Well, I got my letter in writing, signed by him.  However the wording he used was, “He can move in when the apartment is ready.  At this time I estimate it will be ready by April 1.”

Estimate!  April FOOLS, Maaaaan.

I don’t wanna hear come April that he’s just not ready yet and needs another Month.  I can’t do that shit.

But this place is so worth it in every other way it seems.  I don’t think I’m ever gonna get another deal as good as this.  I can Literally live the same life I’m living right now, except without the shitty roommate and I’ll be closer to work!!!!

So is it worth it...?  This waiting game?  And this awkward interim period?

That’s something I’m still mulling over.  But at the very least, I can rest assured that he Wants me to move in.  He WON’T charge me a security deposit.  Everything else IS a good deal..  And he won’t let anyone else swoop in in the meantime.  I get 1st choice.  He is holding this apartment for me until April.

To which if it’s not ready, I can decide whether I’ve had enough and need to look for more places, or if I’ll wait it out some more.

[Which is crazy talk.  Get the fuck outta here. I just broke up with my girlfriend.  We need to LEAVE EACH OTHER!]

Place #8

This one I didn’t get to see...  It’s at an apartment complex and I was very excited about it, because it did seem large and spacious.  It’s farther from work, but also, I’m getting a new job anyway, so that didn’t matter too much to me.

But I talked about it to the Lady, who is still my Friend and she was immediately like, “No way dude!  That’s too much money!!!”  It’s true.  This was a stretch budget.  Even with the help, I’d be depleting my savings and always asking my parents for more help.  And that’s not what I’m about.  At all.

So... when I fell in love with Place #7, it took the edge off of this one.  I probably still would’ve gone just to check it out.  Keep my mind open.

But the more my day unfolded and the more I thought about that deal that I didn’t want to pass up, the more I was like, “I think I can do this.  I can give myself a 2 month time-table and slowly pack.  This could really work...”

And then the friendly realtor called me to double-check our appointment for that day.  I politely thanked her for her time and said that I think I’m going in a different direction.  She thanked me for that as well and the appointment was off.  Frankly, other people were probably chomping at the bit anyway, so one less candidate for her to worry about.

.........................

So this takes me to my interactions at work.  And my overall vibe, I guess.

I’ve been told that people have noticed a change in me.  I look like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.  I’m glowing.  There’s life in my eyes again.  [Which is bittersweet to say].

But I’ve been so passionate about these possible places to live and Dancing Girl definitely fed on my excitement.

It got to the point where at breaks we were the only ones talking again.  Everyone else was in their phones, but her and I would talk about my new possible outcomes, and then she would either bring something different up and I’d listen attentively or we’d laugh about random stuff.

She’s still giddy around me...

And my co-worker who told me about Place #7 also brought up that she thinks I like Dancing Girl.  This scared me.  Is it that obvious?  Are people noticing??

Does she have an idea?  Probably...

The chemistry is more-less back to normal.

But I wrote that blog for a reason.  I can’t forget what happened that first night in town.  She neutral danced with me and then flirty danced with a muscly dude.

It was thrown out there a little bit this week that she wanted to dance and drink again.  I put out neutral energy all week about that.  [Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me.]

I didn’t get excited about Friday.  I did me all week.  And when I was asked about going on Wednesday, I was like, “Honestly, I might be so emotionally exhausted, I might wanna do nothing...”

She immediately piped up and was like, “Whaat?  No, man.  Emotionally Exhausted is the exact time that you Need to be drinking!!”

So, it was clear that she wanted me there.  Or at least a repeat of 2 weeks ago. The same people out.

So Friday’s energy was interesting.  I wasn’t stoked for dancing, or sure it was even gonna happen.  Then the plan blew up in her face when it seemed 2 others didn’t want to go at all.

My night consisted of my lessons and then chilling with my parents for a bit.  It seemed that dancing was on, and I didn’t want to go home.  So I just chilled, responded to the chat and eventually met them out.

The people that didn’t want to go were only there for like an hour.  I thought that was interesting.  It’s almost like they pulled the Wingman move for her.  To just be out, but then be alone with the rest of us.

But here’s where I felt stupid.

Muscle Dude was there again and definitely trying to get in with her.  I vented to my Mom about it already.  I didn’t want to see this!  And I certainly didn’t want to compete.

So I kinda stood by myself and drank alone while the dancing was happening around me.  Eventually she came over to me and told me to take my coat off.

The attention was nice, but...  who knows.

Then I noticed her neutral dancing.  She wasn’t comin’ in with him.  Or me.  And there was another bitch there that I didn’t really like at work.  But this night changed that.

She served as the buffer.  She was a bitch block.  And in a way, I liked that this kept Muscle Dude away.  But also, now I had to play neutral energy and dance more with the other friends or even her, just so that the idea wasn’t out there that I was trying to make moves on Dancing Girl.

Bitch Block is a hawk.  I can tell.  I knew that going in, which was another reason why I wasn’t so jazzed about going out.  But also.... I didn’t want to go home.  And another chance to spend time with her...?  Fuck it.

What are we, anyway?  At the moment, it’s just friends.  Right??

So maybe I went for closure.  I dunno.

The dude definitely tried.  And she took one of his advances.  Mardi Gras beads were thrown into the crowd.  He somehow made a star shaped necklace out of it and put it around her neck.

When she wanted to get out of there, I put my scarf around her neck and she immediately rejected it.  The dude made sure to grab it from her and put it around my neck.

I didn’t like that at all.

So fuck it.  That’s probably the tell.  We’re just friends.  She’s not interested in me.

But we went across town to her other favorite place.  And I liked this way better.  Nice set of craft beers at the bar, and it was a decent dancing atmosphere.  More bar, but still dancing.  And places to fucking Sit!

I liked this a lot actually.  She bought me a beer and we went upstairs and sat.  Bitch block made sure to sit on her other side, so muscle dude couldn’t sit next to her.

He and I befriended each other a little bit.  I was nice to him.  I don’t hate him.  Can't blame a dude for trying, right?

But this was the interesting part.  A song came on and they were dancing.  And then she led him to like, 2 other strangers.  Then she got in my ear saying, “I had him dance with the other girls so maybe he can actually get some pussy tonight!”

This shocked me.  I might’ve given her five, lol.  I dunno.

But that said to me that she’s not into him.

It’s very possible that she’s not into either of us.

But again...  what’s with all the giddiness?  Does she actually know what she wants?  I don’t think so.

She asked what I thought of the place though.  And I told her I loved it.

She smiled and said this was her favorite place.

This tells me she wants to go there again.  Or at least that she likes that I like where she hangs out.  Whether it’s with me or not.  Who knows...?

Too many unknowns dude.

But also... she’s not broken up with her boyfriend yet.  So that’s another reason for not seriously moving in, or asking her out on different hang outs and ‘dates’.

First of all, I’m not ready for that kind of interaction yet, no matter how horny I am.  Secondly, she’ll need a grace period after it inevitably does happen.

But here’s what I have in my favor.  Bitch Block was a little drunk, and admitted to me.  “You’re a cool dude.”  And it was our open dialogue to finally squash whatever weird work beef we had with each other.  I told her I thought she always hated me, and then she came back with the same thing.  She thought I was jealous of her relationship with our boss.  And I was like, “I couldn’t give a fuck about her!!” and we both laughed.

I friended her on FB yesterday and she accepted it.  So there ya go...  She’s probably more of a “Friend”, but I’ll take it.

I don’t remember her actually saying this or not, but I think she mentioned something about coming out to make sure I wasn’t making a move on dancing girl.

I just said, “Yep,” not knowing quite what I heard.  But it was probably that.

And if so, that means I passed!

My vibes weren’t overt.  They were friendly and casual.  And honestly, both girls were dancing with each other all night.  Which was pretty hot, I’m not gonna lie.  Even though I can’t stand Bitch Block.

So if I ever danced with them, it was kind of with both of them.  Muscle dude was on the outside.  Sometimes he’d come around and dance with her, but mostly to himself.  And that was really interesting.

...So I don’t know if this is gonna be a thing that happens every 2 weeks now.  But I can tell that this is her favorite town.  And the results of this night weren’t in favor for either of the Men.

I’m glad I stuck it out though.  Her Dad picked her and Bitch Block up.  Me & Dudebro said goodbye on our way to our cars.

I put it out there to dancing girl, that usually I don’t have more than 3 and I’m always okay to drive in the future.  She definitely didn’t want to leave when she had to.

So who the fuck knows man.

This is a weird transition period, but... I’m on the way to finding my new normal.

Also... I can’t forget the little bit about her talking to some other dude on the side.  She’s a gorgeous girl with a Hell of an Instagram, so I bet she gets hit on ALL the time...

So, she doesn’t talk about him.  But frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised if she broke up with her boyfriend and then wound up with a new one in 2 weeks...

Which brings it back to me.

In the long-run, I don’t want that to be me...  I’m too old.  She’s too young.  It’s too weird.  And also, I can’t just jump into a new relationship.

But that’s where it’s good for her.  Because she’s a party girl.  And she might just wanna fuck.  And that’s something I’d be Aaaaalll about.

Except I know where that goes too.  That ends the friendship. And as our work group is so tight-nit, that would probably be the end of that clique.

But I’m getting a new job anyway, so what does that matter in the end, right?

...Too many unknowns, dude...

This has been my headspace In Finding A New Normal.  Thanks for joining me.