#I had to make it mike wheeler’s problem immediately

[http-byler]

☆ THE THRESHOLD ☆

[apuckishwit]

When Your Boyfriend's a Reformed Mean Girl

100 percent inspired by this tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTR75sjkf/

Time seems to do wierd things for Eddie Munson.

It's something Steve has gotten used to, in the year they've been dating. Eddie is attentive and affectionate, always makes sure Steve needs are being met, always goes the extra mile to let Steve know how much he loves him, how much he cherishes their time together. In many ways, he's the best partner Steve's ever had.

Just...sometimes things like approaching deadlines and important dates seem to literally not register in his brain until it's almost too late. And not even then, sometimes.

Eddie acknowledges that it's a problem. He puts every effort into finding workarounds. There is a calendar hanging at both his (brand new, government-funded) trailer and Steve's house, hanging right by the door with color-coded schedules and a pack of Post-It notes and a cup of pens sitting on a little table below it in case something changes or comes up. Steve has a dedicated half hour every night where he's allowed to remind Eddie of things they have coming up, or ask if they've been added to the calendar and Eddie is one hundred percent not allowed to gripe about being nagged in that thirty minutes. Not that he would, because most of the time there's at least one, "Oh, shit, forgot about that." When something slips through the cracks, he apologizes promptly and sincerely if it's something that affects someone other than him and he is always trying to do better.

Steve understands. Hell, after as many concussions as he's had, details get away from him too sometimes. There's several color-coded blocks on the calendar for Steve, as well. Sometimes, Eddie just forgets things despite his best efforts.

But their anniversary? The date that Steve has been carefully planning for almost a month to celebrate their first (of hopefully, many) year together as a couple? Really?

Eddie is going to be horrified.

He is going to feel so bad, and so guilty, and he is absolutely going to go all out to make it up to Steve. Steve knows this. He knows Eddie loves him, and that Eddie was looking forward to tonight as much as he was, and that this is just an instance of Eddie's brain betraying him, and not him actively trying to hurt Steve, or be dismissive of him. Eddie is going to feel awful when he realizes that he stood Steve up on their one-year anniversary to fight imaginary dragons with the boys. Hell, the boys are probably going to feel awful when they realize they gave Eddie something else to focus on in the lead-up to his one-year anniversary.

Well. Dustin, Lucas, and Will are going to feel awful. Mike will probably think it's hilarious.

The point is, Steve knows Eddie didn't do this on purpose, and it's not that Eddie doesn't value his time with Steve enough to remember the date, and so he's merely irritated. Maybe a little exasperated. Not truly angry.

All he has to do is radio over to Wheeler's place and remind Eddie what the date is. His boyfriend will literally drop everything, will probably not even bother to pack up his precious miniatures and dice before he's tearing out of the driveway and breaking every traffic law imaginable to get to Steve's house. Steve doesn't actually want Eddie to get a ticket or anything, though. Besides.

He's feeling a little petty.

There's steaks waiting to be tossed on the grill, twice-baked potatoes in the oven, and a fucking homemade chiffon cake with fresh strawberries and whipped cream chilling in the fridge. Eddie's gift is sitting on the counter, in an elegant little gift bag tied with black ribbon.

"Hey Rob, you wanna come over for dinner?" he says into his walkie, deciding to let Fate decide if his boyfriend is listening and catches a clue.

"Do I get a piece of that cake you made?" Robin replies immediately, amusement already dancing in her voice because she's his (platonic) soulmate and she can read his mind.

"You can take the leftovers home," he says.

And then his (romantic) soulmate, who can usually read his mind, comes over the channel as well. "Have fun, babe!" Eddie says brightly. "This is probably going to run later than I thought. I'll probably just pick you up for breakfast tomorrow, okay?"

Steve rolls his eyes fondly. "Okay."

"Love you!" Eddie says, and signs off.

Robin brings a bottle of wine she stole from her parents' pantry and they demolish the dinner and half the cake. Steve does get another package of steaks out to thaw in the fridge for tomorrow, though, and blows out the fancy candles he'd lit before they burn too low to be used again. Fuck if he's making another chiffon cake, though, persnickety little thing. He calls Enzo's and orders a chocolate marble cheesecake to be picked up tomorrow.

"So you gonna milk this for a nice present or what?" Robin asks as Steve is packing the remains of the cake for her to take home, as promised.

"Nah. He's fucking perfect like 90% of the time...I'm not gonna get mad at him for the other ten." Robin smiles at him, a little gooey-eyed. Steve returns it with a smirk. "But I'm not letting him off the hook entirely."

He has just finished putting the dishes away when he hears the rumble of Eddie's van in the driveway. He glances down at his watch, laughing to himself a little when he notes that while late, it is far, far too early for a gaming session to be done. He scoops his little gift bag off the counter and saunters to the front door just in time for a frantic knocking to sound. He schools his features and opens the door.

"Steve! Stevie, baby, I am so, so sorry. I swear to God, I had tonight written down in like five different places, but Dustin wanted to try a new character class and we haven't done this campaign yet, and I got so excited...I'm so sorry I forgot, but I'm here and I SWEAR I will make it up to you!" Eddie pauses for breath, wild-eyed and panting.

Steve holds the silence for a moment, and then shakes his head, leaning forward to drop a kiss on Eddie's cheek. "You're such a nerd," he says, affection dripping from his words. He sighs. "I hope you know, now I'm expecting flowers tomorrow. And I get to pick the movies for, like, two weeks with no complaints."

Eddie almost wilts in relief. "Absolutely none," he promises, reaching out to grip Steve's hand. "I will make tomorrow night AMAZING. I promise."

Steve smiles at him, his chest aching with the love he feels for this man. But he's still feeling just a little bit petty. He holds the bag out to Eddie, tilting his head coyly. "You can still open this tonight, though."

"Babe! I thought we said no gifts." He takes the bag in his hands, plucking at the ribbon.

Steve's smile turns just a little sharper. He worked fucking hard on that cake. "It's kind of for both of us, really. It's what I was gonna wear up to bed tonight."

Eddie peeks in the box, his brow furrowing. "Stevie...there's nothing but strawberry lip gloss and a bottle of lube in here." He looks up, and freezes as his brain catches up with what his mouth just said.

Steve leans forward and kisses him, hard, long, and absolutely filthy. "Suffer," he whispers against his boyfriend's lips.

Then he shuts the door in his face.

[artiststarme]

Part 1 of a new thing I’m working on. It only gets juicier from here! I hope you guys enjoy it and if you have any name ideas, please send them my way.

~*~*~*~

Steve was confused most of the time, everyone knew it. Especially since his run-ins with the Upside Down, he never had any idea what was happening. From not sensing the obvious when everyone else grabbed a flashlight to missing blatant social cues, it wasn’t unusual for something to go over his head. And yet, sitting on the little Byers’ floor of his bedroom while Will paced around in front of him, ranting to the air, was the most befuddled Steve had ever been.

Of all of the kids, Steve was never very close to Will. He was the shyest of all the kids and he didn’t seem to need an older role model like Dustin or Max did. He already had Jonathan and his mom, two people that would risk their lives to save him so he never really needed Steve. Don’t get him wrong, Steve loved the kid. He just didn’t have a bond with him the same way he did with the other kids. Nonetheless, when Will asked him for a quick word as Mrs. Byers spoke to El and Jonathan said his goodbyes to Nancy, Steve followed him to his bare room without complaint. He didn’t know what he expected, maybe some advice about girls or hobbies or maybe just Will asking him to look out for the other kids. Something expected, something mundane. But that’s not what Steve received.

Will stopped stalking back and forth, took a deep breath and said, “I’m gay.”

He cringed as he said the words, immediately losing his confidence and breaking eye contact with Steve. And Steve just blinked.

“Okay… Is that all?”

He didn’t really know how to answer that. It didn’t really matter to him if Will liked other dudes and it certainly didn’t change the way he saw the kid. It was still confusing that Will was choosing to tell HIM of all people, he had no idea what about him made everyone want to come out to him with Will being the second person to do so in as many days. But regardless, there was nothing that the kids could do that would make Steve turn on him.

It may not have been the most tactful way of voicing his acceptance but Will felt a weight lifted despite it. He knelt down to give a thankful hug to Steve who returned his hug awkwardly.

“Thanks Steve, I knew out of everyone that you would understand.” Steve was about to ask why he of all people would understand but Will continued, “No one else knows yet, not even Mike and uh… I really like him, Steve.”

All thoughts left Steve’s mind as he automatically started insulting Will’s taste. “Mike? Mike Wheeler? What the hell, dude. I have no problem with you liking guys but Mike? Jesus Christ, he’s like the worst person you could choose. His attitude sucks, he’s got beady little eyes full of anger, and he’s kind of a douche.”

Will looked stuck somewhere between amused and offended. “But… he’s my best friend? He’s always been there and I, I think I love him a little bit. What do I do?”

Steve sighed and put a heavy hand on his shoulder, his bruised face grimacing in sympathy. “You’re young so you have plenty of time to fall for other guys. Move on. Trust me, you do not want to date a Wheeler. Especially Mike. My god, kid, have a little taste. I can understand Nancy but Mike? No way.”

“But, but you’re sure you’re okay with me… being gay. I like boys, not girls,” Will prodded.

“I know what it means, Byers. It doesn’t change anything. Liking boys doesn’t make you any different and you’re still another one of the runts to me, alright?” He ducked his head to meet Will’s eyes and only when he nodded did he put space between him. “Good. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to me. I’ll always be here if you need me.”

“Can I call you? After we move to California?” Will asked with trepidation.

“Hell yeah, I’ll be around. You can call me, El can call me, hell even Jonathan can call me if he wants.”

That last part got him a weird look in response. “... you want Jonathan to call you?”

“I mean, sure, if he wants to. He probably won’t because I’m no Nancy and we’re not really friends but it would be nice to have people calling,” Steve shrugged and ignored Will’s look of appall.

“I thought you wouldn’t like Jonathan because he stole your girlfriend.”

He frowned, “nah, there were other things wrong between Nance and I long before your brother came around. He’s pretty cool and he’s got an awesome little brother too, what’s not to like?”

Will smiled and they sat in silence for a few moments before Steve cleared his throat, said his last goodbyes, and made his way home. He slunk back to bed to sleep off the oncoming migraine and pain in his beaten face. Steve didn’t think much more about Will’s admission or their emotional conversation. Instead, he focused on the warm feeling in his chest that came with two people trusting him enough to be honest to him, to be themselves without fear around him. Robin and Will were the first people who trusted him with something important beyond reputation or popularity. It made him feel like he was finally doing something right, like he had finally moved past all of the King Steve bullshit and he’d never felt better about it.

[stevie-petey]

episode five: the flea and the acrobat

“Steve, what-” He pushes past you in a frenzied hurry to get to his car, but you grab his jacket and force him to stop. “Answer me! Is Nancy okay? Was Jonathan with her?” Steve whips around and sneers at you. “Why do you even care about them? About him?” “Because we’re friends,” you say, and for the first time you really mean it. Nancy has become someone you’d call a friend.  Another cruel laugh escapes Steve’s lips. “Friends, huh? Yeah, those two looked real fucking cozy in her bed.”

summary: you and dustin have a long overdue Sibling Moment, at will's funeral you and jonathan exchange information and surprise ! it's all horrible news ! nancy has awful timing and when you leave her alone with jonathan one damn time you and steve end up trauma bonded on her front porch #bffs.

rating: general, though there's the use of guns in here for plot point sake, as well as cursing

warnings: use of guns, cursing, fem!reader, and use of y/n.

words: 14.4k (whew)

before you swing in: i'm back gang ! fall semester is almost done and i am in the trenches, so i leave y'all with this monster of a chapter before hell week (i have three finals in one day next week, no i don't want to talk about it). please enjoy this beauty, i had so much fun messing with character relationships in this and it was very ;)

-

With how many times you’ve knocked on the Wheeler’s door this week, you’d think that Mrs. Wheeler would stop looking so surprised when she answers. 

“Y/N?”

You give the woman a small smile. “Hi, Mrs. Wheeler. Is, uh, Mike home?”

“Yes… he stayed home today because of Will. Is there something you need?” The usually friendly woman seems beaten down from this week’s events as well, which you’re understanding of. 

“I was wondering if I could come in and see how he’s doing? Dustin is really shaken up about it, so I figured…” You shrug, trying to come across as a concerned older sister figure rather than a worried and horrible babysitter who should really retire. 

Mrs. Wheeler places a hand over her heart. “Oh, Y/N. You’ve always been so good with the boys, of course you can check on him. It means a lot that you care.”

Oh, no problem, but if we’re being honest I’m here because I’m scared I accidentally let your son get involved with the supernatural and dangerous monster men thingies that I honestly can’t wrap my head around!

Of course you can’t tell the woman this, so instead you thank her and let yourself in. Immediately you head towards the basement and fling the door open. You like Mrs. Wheeler, but the amount of times her son has snuck out of the house without her noticing honestly concerns you, so you’re a bit unsure if Mike even is home.

You get deja-vu from a few days ago as you head down the basement steps, once again hearing the three boys panicking as they try to hide El. Unlike last time, which had only annoyed you, seeing them scramble to hide the girl makes you relieved. 

They’re here, alive and well. You’d let Steve distract you from your worrying on the drive over, so the relief hits you like a damn truck. 

“Oh god not again!” Dustin groans when he sees you, worried that he’s once again going to get yelled at for being at the Wheeler’s with El. 

You ignore his theatrics and walk over to the girl, who is laying face down on the couch. You notice that she’s dressed in one of Nancy’s old costumes and a blonde wig that suits her well. What the hell did the kids get up to today? 

“Do I want to know why El is dressed like a doll and almost passed out on the couch?” 

“That depends on if you’re going to yell at us again,” Mike says. 

You shoot him a glare, but you guess he has a point. The last few times you’ve been with the kids you’ve ended up yelling at them one way or another. You feel bad about that, but then again: they won’t stop getting into trouble. 

El manages to raise her head from the couch, “Hi, Y/N.”

“Hi, sweetie,” you approach the couch and gently nudge her to the side so that you can sit down and place her head on your lap. She nuzzles into your warmth and lets out a sleepy sigh. “And to answer your question, Mike: I’m not here to yell at you guys. I just… Please tell me what’s been going on. I know I haven’t been here for you guys like I should’ve, but-”

“Your boyfriend needed you more,” Mike quips, though there’s some resentment in his voice that causes you to feel even worse.

Dustin hits his shoulder against the boy. “He isn’t her boyfriend, but she couldn’t just abandon him; he needed her. Besides, we have been sneaking off without telling her anything.” 

You cast an appreciative smile at your brother, thankful that even though he’s a pain in your ass, he always has your back like you do his. It’s something he’s always done with you and Mike; being so similar, you and him are constantly butting heads, yet Dustin has always been the first to defend you against his friend (even if you’ve never needed it in the first place). 

“I’m sorry, okay? I messed up, but I’m here now and I really, really need to know if I’m being paranoid. What mess did you dweebs manage to get into?”

The three boys suddenly can’t look at you. Their heads turn in different directions, Lucas scratches the back of his neck, Mike kicks at a board piece on the ground, and Dustin whistles a tune. 

Your shoulders slump. “Is it that bad?”

“It started this morning,” 

“Lucas!”

“Mike, she could help us! The weirdo clearly likes her,” he gestures over to El practically asleep in your lap, “plus, she’s the only sane one left in this group. I need backup.” 

“Backup?” You ask. 

Mike throws his head back in annoyance and lets out a groan as if he’s dying. Truly, this kid is the most dramatic person you’ve ever met. “Fine, we’ll tell you everything if you agree to stop hounding us for sneaking around. Will is missing, he’s our friend, and no one in the party gets left behind.”

You think this over for a moment, weighing the pros and cons in your head. “I will agree to those terms if you guys agree to keep me updated on everything at all times.” 

The boys try to argue, but you don’t let them. 

“I mean it, another person is missing. Nancy’s friend, Barb, was in the same woods that Will was, the same woods that you guys keep insisting on trekking through without supervision. This is serious, guys. Whatever, or whoever, is out there… it’s dangerous, and I-” You swallow down some tears that claw against your throat. “I can’t lose anyone else, okay?” 

The mood in the room is solemn, the three boys silent as your words hang in the air. Naturally, you try to lighten things up. “I’ll deny this if anyone asks, but unfortunately I love you boys.” 

As expected, they immediately begin to gag and pretend that they’ve been impaled with something as they all scream “ew” and “yuck” at your words. You laugh, which causes El to laugh as well, and for a moment it feels like nothing has changed. 

“So?” You ask after the boys have finished their gross theatrics. 

Dustin is the one who makes the decision for them. “We promise to keep you updated, for real this time.” 

“Good, now again I ask: why is El dressed like a doll and half asleep on my lap as we speak?” 

Lucas, Dustin, and Mike begin to talk all at once. 

“Mike radioed for me to head over, claiming he heard Will on the walkie.”

“Yeah, and then they radioed me to join. Sorry, by the way. I would’ve woken you up, but you and Jonathan looked so cozy in your bed so-”

“I thought you said they weren’t dating?”

“Not now, Mike.”

It continues like this for a while as they explain everything they did today. Sneaking El into the school, having to to talk to Mr. Clark, attending the assembly for Will, Mike fighting some idiotic kids for making fun of him before El made the head bully pee himself. 

You look down at the girl in your lap. “You can really make people pee themselves?”

“Sometimes,” she shrugs. 

“Lovely.” 

“That’s what you focus on, Y/N?” Mike asks you, and you simply shrug your shoulders in response. Sue you for still having doubts about Will being alive, you’ve gotten your hopes up one too many times. 

“Are you suggesting I believe that you heard Will through your cheap little walkies?” 

Dustin puts his head in his hands in defeat while Lucas gestures over to you. “See, she’s the sane backup I need.” 

Mike groans at you once more. “No, that’s why we snuck El into the radio room and used the heathkit that Mr. Clark got us. Keep up!”

“What, did you tell the guy that El was a new student?” 

“Don’t be stupid, we told Mr. Clark that she’s my cousin.” 

“Uhh, Y/N,” Dustin laughs nervously, motioning for you to stop talking. “You promised you’d be cool about everything if we told you.”

Knowing that your brother is right, you deflate a bit against the couch and start playing with El’s hair. “I am being cool, I just have so many questions.”

“Oh, just wait.” Lucas snorts. 

Mike now crosses the room to stand in front of you, as if he’s gearing up to tell you some major news. “We heard Will on the heathkit. El, she managed to use her powers to communicate with him.”

Like always, the seriousness in his voice concerns yet intrigues you. “Lucas, do you really believe that it was Will?”

The boy nods at you, his face grim. You don’t like how scared he looks, because out of the entire group he’s the one who is always the most reasonable. If he’s willingly telling you that he thinks it was Will, then you have to start taking the situation at hand seriously. 

“Okay, tell me exactly what you guys heard.”

And they do. One by one they tell you about Will’s pleading for his mom, telling her that it’s like home but cold and dark, the banging that followed after his words, how El had used so much of her energy trying to maintain the communication before the radio caught fire and she was too exhausted to do much else. 

“So, you believe us now?” Mike asks after you’re silent for a moment. 

You look down at the girl in your lap, in awe that someone so small and shy could hold so much power. This time you believe what the boys tell you without much conviction. Now that you know that Barb is missing as well, lost in the same woods as Will, the same woods where you found El, the photos from Nancy and the figure she claims she saw… It’s all starting to come together. 

You’re not sure exactly what you’re caught up in, but you know it’s too late to back out. Whatever is going on, whatever thing took Will and transported him to some unknown place with possibly the same powers that El has, you know it’s your responsibility to handle it. 

“Yes,” you respond, and the boys all sigh with relief. “Just one question though,”

Dustin sighs. “Yes, Y/N?”

“How did it take you guys so long to set fire to the school? Honestly, Jonathan and I thought it’d happen sooner.” 

“You’re hilarious.” Mike deadpans, which only causes you and El to giggle together again. 

“I hate to ruin the good mood, but we seriously need to figure out what Will meant when he said that wherever he is ‘is like home’.” Your brother interrupts. 

Mike spins to face him. “He said, ‘like home, but dark’, right?”

“And ‘empty’.” Lucas adds. 

“‘Empty’ and ‘cold’. Wait, did he say cold?” Dustin asks the group.

You nod your head. “You mentioned cold earlier.”

Lucas throws his hands up in the air in frustration. “The stupid radio kept going in and out!” 

“It’s like riddles in the dark…” Your brother sighs, which you hum in agreement to. 

Will’s words were pretty vague, but you wish you had been there at the middle school as well. Maybe if you had heard the tone of Will’s voice, you’d be of more help.

Mike continues to mumble about “like home” and “dark” for a few more seconds, now pacing around the room. You watch from the couch, El still resting with her head in your lap, and as you’re playing with her hair she finally speaks up after having been silent for a while. 

“Upside down.”

“What’d she say?” Lucas asks.

“Upside down? I guess?” Is all you can tell him. 

“What?” 

While you, Dustin, and Lucas are confused by El’s words, Mike rushes over to the forgotten board from a few days ago and sits down. He frantically flips it over and motions for you to come and join him. You hesitate for a second, but he only doubles down on his waving you over, so you gently lift El’s head up and walk over. 

“God, took you long enough.”

“I was literally three feet away from you on the couch, why did I have to move?”

Mike ignores your question and begins to explain the thirty million thoughts flying through his head at the moment, “When El showed us where Will was, she flipped the board over, remember?” 

You nod, slowly understanding where he’s going with this. “She flipped it upside down.”

“Exactly! Dark. Empty.” 

Lucas looks over at you and Dustin, unamused. “Do you understand what he’s talking about?”

“No,” your brother says at the same time as you saying “the upside down part? Yes. The dark and empty part? No.”

Mike tries to explain further. “Guys, come on, think about it. When El took us to find Will, she took us to his house, right?” 

“You mean last night when they found Will’s body in the water?” You ask, not really understanding where Mike is going with all this. 

“Like Y/N said, he wasn’t there.” Lucas reminds everyone, but Mike still tries to get his point across.

“But what if he was there? What if we just couldn’t see him, what if he was on the other side?”

You think about Jonathan’s words from earlier today in the car while on the way to the funeral home, trying to calm down from his fight with his mom. He had told you about how Joyce was convinced that Will was in the walls within their home, that the body they saw in the morgue hadn’t been his. 

“Hold on,” you interrupt Mike, “you guys said that there was some, like, banging where Will was, right? And that he had been begging his mom to come get him?” 

“Yeah, it was like some sick sci-fi movie!” 

You glare at your brother. “Ignoring you. Anyways, did you guys hear Mrs. Byers on the radio as well?” 

Mike shakes his head. “No, all we could hear was the banging and something... Growling, I guess.”

Knowing Joyce, you’d bet money that the banging had been her. You know that the next time you go over to their house, the walls might actually be destroyed, but she’d been right all along. Will is alive, he has to be. The pieces that you’ve slowly been collecting this past week fall together one by one. 

“That explains the walls and the weird monster thing in Jonathan’s picture,” you mumble to yourself, but Lucas hears you. 

“Do I wanna know?”

You purse your lips. “Let’s focus on figuring out where Will is, then I’ll tell you guys what I’ve been up to this week.” 

“Okay, so,” Mike begins again, now grabbing the board game and flipping it onto its normal, light side. “What if this is Hawkins,” he flips it upside down onto its dark side, “and this is where Will is?” 

“The Upside Down.” You finish for him. 

“The Upside Down.” Mike confirms. 

Slowly Dustin follows along. “Like the Vale of Shadows.”

Somehow you always end up the one confused when it comes to these damn kids. “The Vale of Shadows? What the hell is that?”

Dustin runs over to the bookshelf and pulls out a thick binder full of paper, but as he flips through it you realize it’s a rulebook for Dungeons and Dragons. He lands on the page he’s looking for, and you feel your shoulders drop. Great. More confusing terminology ahead. 

“‘The Vale of Shadows’,” he begins to read, “‘is a dimension that is a dark reflection or echo of our world. It is a place of decay and death. A plane out of phase. A place of monsters’.”

“Wait, didn’t you say something about a monster, Y/N?” Lucas asks, but you shush him so you don't miss whatever else Dustin will say next. 

“‘It is right next to you, and you don’t even see it’.” He finishes. 

His words hang in the air for a moment, but Mike, always somehow three steps ahead, pieces it together. “An alternate dimension.” 

Lucas finally accepts what’s happening. “But how do we get there?” 

“I’m sorry, we?” You look between all three boys, their faces still young and holding the childish innocence that you once had yourself. “No, there’s no ‘we’ in this. I may not know much about alternate dimensions, but there’s no way I’m letting you guys try to find and go to one.”

Mike rolls his eyes at you. “Well what choice do we have? Do you want to tell that mean police chief about this?”

“I…well… I mean-no.” You sink down in the seat, annoyed that Mike is right. No way Hopper believes any of this, you hardly believe any of it. 

“Can we cast shadow walk?” Dustin focuses back on the conversation at hand.

You don’t bother to ask what that means. 

“In real life, dummy.” Lucas reminds him. 

“We can’t shadow walk, but…” Your brother’s eyes land on El, who is still laying on the couch, silent and unmoving. “Maybe she can.”

The four of you turn towards the girl, and Mike voices his own question. “Do you know how we get there? To the Upside Down?”

El meets your eyes, and you can see that she’s hesitant about something. She’s been quieter than usual, almost suspiciously so, and you know that the more Mike figures things out, the more hesitant she becomes. She shakes her head at you, and you give her a sad smile. 

Lucas flings his head back and groans. “Oh my god!”

Mike and Dustin seem to be thinking the same thing, disappointed by El’s lack of help. You don’t blame them, also frustrated by the fact that it feels like you guys are so close to discovering something big. You can feel hope reignite in your chest; you haven’t been this close to an explanation about Will all week. This has to be it. It’s the only way you can explain everything that’s been happening lately. 

Speaking of which:

“Remember how I mentioned Barb and a possible monster?” 

You tell them everything, about Jonathan’s worry for his mom, how their phone got charred by lightning, Hopper’s theory that Will had been running from something, Nancy and Barb attending Steve’s party and how Barb had been on her own near the woods. You tell them about how Barb has been missing ever since and the photos Jonathan took (leaving out the horrible ones of Nancy) that Nancy brought to your attention at the funeral home. The figure in the background, looming over Barb, how it didn’t seem to have a face.

Then you tell them about Joyce and her spiral, though now you know she actually wasn’t crazy. You tell them about the Christmas lights and Will communicating with her through them. How she claimed that she could hear him through the wall and that the body in the quarry hadn’t been him. 

When you’re finally done catching them up, they stare at you with their jaws open. 

“Dustin,” Mike says, “remind me to never leave your sister out ever again.”

“Noted.” 

– 

The events from the day had left El exhausted and she refuses to say anything else after you explain everything to the boys. Her eyes droop while Mike interrogates you for answers you can’t give him, so finally you take pity on the poor girl and tell him that you’ll talk more in the morning. 

Mike isn’t too happy about being shut down, but when you point towards a half asleep El he reluctantly gives in. “Fine, but as soon as the funeral is over we’re discussing this further.”

Right. Will’s funeral is tomorrow. 

“Yeah, sure,” you tuck your hair behind your ears and motion over to Dustin. “We need to go, it’s late and mom will be wondering where we are.” 

He tries to argue with you but you just gather your things and head for the stairs. There’s still a lot you need to think about and a million things you need to sort before the funeral tomorrow. Did Jonathan even buy the coffin? Who had made the arrangements after you and him left the funeral home with Nancy?

There’s a lot you need to talk about when you call him tonight. 

The bike ride home with Lucas and Dustin is a quiet one, both boys understanding that you need some time to think about everything you learned tonight. 

You make a list in your head of what you do know, but it’s a frustratingly short list. 

1) El, one way or another, has powers that enable her to communicate with Will in some weird upside down universe that you can’t actually get to (can you even count this as something you know?)

2) Hopper was right: Will went missing because he was running from something (probably the same faceless thing that’s in Jonathan’s photo). 

3) Whatever took Will also took Barb, bringing Nancy into this wonderfully confusing mess (you still don’t know if her involvement is a good or bad thing). 

Everything else? You have no fucking clue what’s going on. 

When you get home with Dustin, it’s late; the two of you have to sneak past your mom, who fell asleep with Mews on her lap in the living room. Dustin heads straight for his room but you stop him, motioning for him to come into yours for a second. 

“What-”

“Shh!” You quickly shut your door to ensure that your mom won’t hear anything. 

Dustin groans. “I thought you said you weren’t gonna yell at me?”

You roll your eyes at him. “I yell at you guys twice after years of patience, now suddenly I’m a screaming monster,” he doesn’t say anything and flings himself onto the bean bag by your bed. “Anyways, we’re long overdue for a code blue.” 

Your brother shoots up from the bean bag, eyes wide. “No.”

“Yes,” you join him on the bean bag. “Code blue time, we’re going to talk about our feelings after the hellish week we’ve had. C’mon, you know the drill.” 

Code blue was something the two of you came up with when your dad left. You had been twelve when it happened, Dustin had been nine. It’d been a really rough few months for you guys, dealing with the betrayal of your dad while also moving away from your hometown in Virginia all within a year. Neither of you had adjusted well to the sudden changes, and though you were angry and bitter about what had happened, the moment you saw that it was affecting your brother you decided to implement code blue. 

It’s simple, really. Whoever calls for a code blue gets to talk about or ask whatever they want while the other is required to answer. Originally it was so that you could force Dustin into telling you his feelings, but over the years it’s become a way to bond with each other and know that no matter what you’ll be there for one another. No half truths or a vague “I’m fine”; it’s a time for you guys to be vulnerable with one another without using it as leverage against the other. 

Dustin plops his head back down. “Fine, but I’m tired so can this be quick?”

“Hey, no complaining during code blue. That’s like, rule number one.” 

“Y/N.” His tone is one of annoyance and you know that if you don’t start talking soon then you’ll lose his interest.

“Right, sorry. Okay,” you clear your throat and face your brother. “Today’s code blue topic is this: I’m worried about you getting your hopes up about Will. We don’t know that he’s alive just yet.” 

As expected, Dustin is unhappy with what you’ve said. “We do know that he’s alive, I heard him on the heathkit. He’s alive, Y/N.” He sees the uncertainty on your face and doubles down on what he’s saying. “He is.”

You bite your lip, scared that you’ll say the wrong thing. “Dustin, nothing is certain. Even though we’re definitely onto something, and while I believe that you heard Will on the radio, that doesn’t change the fact that there’s something else out there that wants to hurt him. I mean, he’s trapped in some weird alternate dimension that we have no idea how to even get into. I just… I don’t want to see you get hurt again.”

You think about the way your brother’s face fell when they pulled Will’s body out of the water. How the hope that had been in his eyes immediately died alongside his childhood naivety. He had built all of his hope upon a shaky foundation; the moment it collapsed he fell apart. 

“Look I know you’re trying to look out for me, but Will is a part of the party. He’s our friend, we can’t just lose hope and leave him behind. He needs us.” Dustin speaks with so much certainty and an aura of maturity that almost makes you forget that he’s twelve. 

“I’m not saying it’s dangerous to have hope, but I need you to promise me that you’ll protect yourself from whatever happens next. How’s that sound?”

Dustin thinks for a moment, tapping a finger against his chin. “Hmm, I think I can make that deal if you promise the same thing. I mean, c’mon, it’s obvious that you’re the sensitive one out of the two of us. You and hope? Doomed.” 

You laugh, knowing he’s right. You’ve always been branded by hope; hopeful for love, for dreams, and for those who may not always deserve it. You and hope haven’t always gotten along, but she’s become a familiar friend. 

“I think you’ve got yourself a deal. Now, it’s late and I have to call Jonathan and catch him up on everything, so let’s conclude code blue with its mandatory hug.” 

“Woah woah woah, I don’t think we gotta-”

Dustin’s words become muffled as you throw yourself on top of him and squish him into a hug. He squirms against you for a second, claiming he can’t breathe, but you shush him and force him to accept the hug. Though you won’t ever tell him this, losing Will has only made you more appreciative of having a wonderfully annoying little brother. 

After code blue, Dustin goes to his room claiming that “alternate dimensions are super draining”, and before he leaves you tell him to be ready tomorrow by nine for the funeral and that your mom will take him. You’ll be at the Byers’ helping Jonathan. 

Once he’s gone you give yourself a few moments to sit in silence, letting the events from today settle over you. It seems like all you’ve felt this week is exhaustion and hurt and at the rate everything is going, there’s no telling how long you’ll feel this way. 

The moment you’re done wallowing you roll off the bean bag and walk over to your desk to call Jonathan. You’re honestly not sure what you’ll even tell him tonight, there’s no way you’ll be able to cover everything before the night ends. The two of you have a long day tomorrow, so you figure you’ll have to make do with the limited time you have and summarize. 

Jonathan answers after a few rings. “How’d your little secret mission go?”

You make a face. “Is it even a secret mission if I told you I was going on it?”

“It is if you refuse to tell me what you did during it.” 

“Touche, bee.” 

He laughs, which sends a cascading warmth throughout your body. You can envision him perfectly on the other end of the line, leaning against his kitchen wall with the phone wire wrapped around his finger as he absent mindedly fiddles with it while he talks to you. 

You clear your throat and shake the thought from your mind, you called him for a reason. “Anyways… we need to talk.”

Jonathan is silent for a moment and you can feel the playfulness fade away. “Yeah, you first though. You already know what Nance and I were up to.” 

Nance?

Awesome. Cool. Totally not going to be consumed by that later. 

“Right. Uh, well. I went looking for Dustin because the other night when I was with the boys we stumbled upon this, well, this little girl.” 

“A girl?”

“Yeah, she’s bald.”

“Okay… is that important or…?”

“Unsure, but it felt important to tell you. Sorry,” you take a deep breath, “I’m not sure why I’m so nervous right now.”

“It’s okay, bug. It’s me, you can tell me anything.” 

No I can’t.

“Sure, yeah, totally. Um, so anyways we found her, her name is El, and she’s our only connection to Will right now.”

A beat of silence. “What do you mean?”

“Well, she kinda has… powers?”

“Powers,”

“Powers.”

You hear Jonathan sigh on the other end of the call. “Bug, you’re not seriously telling me that the boys have somehow dragged you into one of their little schemes, right?”

Yeah, he’s reacting exactly how you figured he would. 

“I know what it sounds like, but Jonathan… How else would you explain everything going on? Will disappeared, Barb did too, your mom and her lights. Now that thing Nancy saw in the woods, which I know you definitely have an update that will only further prove how weird this all is.”

Again Jonathan is quiet, and this time you envision him pacing little circles in the kitchen as he carefully thinks through your words, trying to piece it all together. “We developed the photo again and you’re right, there’s something behind Barb in it.” 

You close your eyes and exhale. “So, you believe me now?”

“Guess I don’t really have a choice.”

“You don’t.” 

“Then we’ll talk about it after the funeral tomorrow.” He concedes. 

“Yeah,” you let out a shaky breath, “the funeral. I’ll make my way over the second I wake up tomorrow to help with everything.” 

“You don’t have to-”

“I know.” 

More silence settles over the two of you. It’s still hard to wrap your head around the fact that it was only a week ago where everything was normal. No disappearances, no weird feelings, no heartbreak and confusion. 

“Bug?” Jonathan is practically whispering. 

“Yeah?”

“Lonnie is here.”

The words hit you hard. Why the fuck is Lonnie back in Hawkins? “Do you need to spend the night? I can finally bake those cookies for your mom and we can watch whatever you want.” 

“No,” he sounds exhausted. “He hasn’t been a problem yet, and I can’t…” 

“Leave your mom with him?” You finish. 

“He thinks she’s crazy and her axing down one of our walls doesn’t help-”

So you were right, Joyce did indeed break down her wall to try and get to Will.

“Jonathan, it’s okay. I understand, stay with her and get some rest. Sleep, that’s an order.”

He lets out a weak laugh. “I love you, bug.” 

Like how I love you?

“I love you too, bee.” The words burn your tongue. 

“Goodnight,”

“Sleep well.”

– 

You’re up before the sun this morning.

You spent hours tossing and turning last night, hardly getting any sleep. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t seem to turn your mind off. All you could think about was Jonathan, his smile and his voice and the way he kisses your forehead whenever you’ve done something especially endearing to him. You were surrounded by him last night. 

Now you stand outside his front door holding a tin of cookies, dressed in a simple knitted black dress and tights with mary janes that used to belong to your mom for Will’s funeral. The shoes are your favorite, but now you’re afraid they’re tainted by the occasion you’re wearing them for. 

It’s Lonnie who opens the door. “Well if it isn’t little miss Henderson. I missed ya, sweetheart.” 

You haven’t seen the man in two years, having been fourteen when he left Joyce and the kids. Since then he’s only aged horribly, his eyes slightly yellowed and his beer gut now more prominent. Clearly he still prefers alcohol over human company. Figures. 

“Can’t say the same about you.” Your shoulder hits his as you walk in and he lets out an annoyed huff. 

The man follows you but you pay him no attention. Instead you head straight towards Joyce and the second she sees you she runs into your arms; you only have a few seconds to place down the cookies before she’s in your arms. 

“Y/N! You’re here!” She squeezes you tight and you melt into her embrace. She’s always given the best hugs whenever you’ve needed the comfort, but now it’s your turn to be the one offering the support. 

“Of course, Mrs. Byers. Who else will make sure Jonathan is ready on time?” You mean for it to be a joke, but the way that Joyce’s eyes harden tells you that the funeral is a sore topic for her. She still doesn’t believe that Will is dead and it breaks your fucking heart that you can’t tell her she’s right. 

Joyce wipes away a tear before pulling away. She goes to say something before seeing the tin of cookies on the counter; she immediately pulls you into another hug. “Oatmeal raisin,” 

“They’re your favorite.”

“And Will’s.”

“And Will’s favorite. You know I gotta take care of my Byers.” You whisper into her ear, feeling Lonnie’s eyes on you during the exchange. You have to bite back your tongue, though his presence always makes you feel a type of anger that’s normally foreign to you. 

Joyce pulls away and you know it’s taking everything in her to give you a smile. “You’re too good, sweetie,” she tucks a loose strand of hair that came out of its braid. “Jonathan’s in his room.” 

You grab her hand and give it a squeeze, trying to convey just how much you love and admire her into a simple gesture, before letting go and walking over to Jonathan’s door. 

He’s struggling with his tie when you let yourself in. He’s dressed in the only nice white button down he owns, something he bought for his aunt’s funeral a few years ago that now hardly fits. You can tell that he’s getting frustrated with the tie, so you walk over and help. 

“Here, let me,” you wrap your fingers around the piece of cloth and quickly fashion it into a tie. The two of you don’t talk while you fix the clothing and you know that today will be a wordless day with Jonathan. 

When you’ve finished, you begin to pull away before he places his hands around yours. He cups your hands at the base of his neck as they rest against his collarbones; your fingers are still wrapped around his tie. He squeezes your hands and brings them to his lips and kisses your knuckles so softly that you feel all the love within you simmer.

You know he’s only trying to express his gratitude for you but the butterflies in your stomach make you feel faint. 

You’d do anything for him. 

– 

The funeral has a surprising turnout, not because you ever doubted Will’s incredible ability to be loved by anyone he meets, but because you see faces in the crowd who you’ve never seen before. 

You stand behind Jonathan during the funeral with your hand on his shoulder as he sits with his family in a weak attempt to provide comfort during the service. It’s really fucking bleak. Your other hand is on Dustin’s shoulder as he stands next to you while Mike and Lucas are to the right of him.

Your mother is in the back of the crowd having known she’d cry the entire service, and faintly you can hear her blow her nose into a tissue and sniffle. 

The pastor drones on for a while about how a tragedy like this won’t separate everyone from God’s love, but if attending the funeral for a twelve year old boy is how God shows his love then you want no part in it. Joyce sits stoic alongside Lonnie, Jonathan hasn’t moved at all since the service began; they’re a family brought together by grief. This isn’t love. 

“Just wait until we tell Will that Jennifer Hayes was crying at his funeral,” Dustin snickers, effectively breaking you from your thoughts. You hit his shoulder and shush him as Mrs. Wheeler reminds the boys to be quiet. You flash her an apologetic smile for your brother’s actions. 

You know how firmly the boys believe Will is alive and you honestly can’t say you don’t think so as well, but nothing is certain. Even if he’s alive there’s no way you guys can get to wherever he is; you wish the boys would use some caution with how quickly they’re building their hopes up. 

After the service you walk up to Will’s grave and bend down. You bring one of the yellow roses from the funeral director up to your lips and whisper, “If you’re out there little bee, please, come home.”

Before dropping the rose in you give it a gentle kiss, inhaling its sweet scent and watching as it falls down onto his coffin. Jonathan finds you there crouched down and sees the rose right as it lands. He doesn’t say anything, he just grabs your hand and helps you stand up to bring you over to where Nancy is waiting a couple yards away. 

“Hey, Y/N.” 

You don’t have it in you to do anything other than wave at the girl, but she seems to understand and gives you a sympathetic smile. 

Soon the three of you are settled on the ground with your backs against an old rickety fence behind some tombstones. Jonathan is in the middle of you and Nancy and you rest your head against his shoulder, already exhausted from the day. It’s not the coziest spot to be sitting, but at least you’re away from prying eyes. 

Once you’re seated, Jonathan finally talks for the first time today. “Alright, I already told you this over the phone last night bug, but Nancy was right. After we redeveloped the photo there’s definitely some kind of figure behind Barb, and we thought maybe if my mom has been right all along about some monster-”

“Then she’s right about Will being alive.” You finish for him, having already come to the same conclusion yourself.

“And Barb has to be alive if Will is.” Nancy says, and there’s a spark of hope in her voice that surprises you. You’re ashamed to admit that you didn’t think her and Barb were that close, but seeing how worried she’s been for the girl makes you realize that you’d been a fool not to have seen it sooner. Barb was Nancy’s closest friend. You don’t know what you’d do if Jonathan ever disappeared like Barb did. 

Jonathan pushes your head with his shoulder. “Anything you want to share with the class?”

You look between him and Nancy and try to decide how much you should tell them. While you’ve already told Jonathan a little bit about El, you’re not sure if you can trust the information with Nancy. However, seeing her urgency to find her friend leaves you feeling a bit safer disclosing the information to her. 

“It started the night after Will disappeared…”

It takes a while to tell them everything, and while Jonathan butts in a few times to ask questions, Nancy remains silent and eagerly listens. She nods when she’s supposed to, engages with the story as if her life depends on it. You’re incredibly impressed by her intelligence and openness to the situation at hand. Had it been anyone else they would’ve scoffed at you and called you insane. But Nancy? She holds onto every word and trusts that what you’re saying is true. 

You’re starting to admire her, as painful as it is to admit. But Nancy Wheeler is fucking brilliant, there’s no denying that. 

When you’re finally done explaining El and the Upside Down, Nancy finally speaks. “Let me make sure I’m understanding correctly, you’ve been helping my brother harbor a girl with superpowers in my basement?”

Huh. 

You hadn’t thought of it that way. 

“Ya know, you make a good point.”

Thankfully she laughs and doesn’t seem too upset, which relieves you. You reassure her that they’re fine and that El is someone you trust, and Nancy seems to take comfort in your words. It’s not that you purposely hid the situation from her, but looking back you definitely could’ve used her help now that you know how cool she is. 

As the two of you are laughing, Jonathan pulls out a piece of paper. 

“What’s that?” You ask. 

He shows you. “I printed out a map of Hawkins and drew x’s on every place we know for sure the monster has been.” 

“Two questions: one, so we’re officially calling it the monster now? And two, why don’t you ever put in this much effort for school projects we do together?” 

Jonathan flicks the paper in your face. “Funny. And yes, we’re calling it the monster now. Can you pay attention please?”

“Sorry,”

Nancy shuffles in closer and her head is practically on Jonathan’s shoulder as well (you’re choosing to ignore that) and she studies the paper and points to one of the x’s. “So that’s-”

“Steve’s house,” Jonathan points to another x, “and that’s the woods where they found Will’s bike and where Y/N last saw him,” the familiar feeling of guilt washes over you, “and that’s my house.” 

Nancy reaches over Jonathan and grabs your hand, surprising you both. “You saw Will last?”

“Yeah,” you swallow, your mouth now suddenly dry. 

“I’m sorry,” her tone is sincere.

“We should get back to the map…” You dodge, highly uncomfortable with Nancy’s comfort. You appreciate it, but you’ve never been good at accepting help from others. 

“Right, sorry,” Nancy clears her throat. “The x’s, they’re all so close.”

Jonathan observes the interaction with slight confusion but decides not to say anything besides, “Yeah, exactly. I mean, it’s all within a mile or something. Whatever this thing is, it’s not traveling far.”

There’s a look in his eyes as he speaks, one of determination and disdain for whatever that thing is, and before you can tell him no, it’s Nancy who voices your concern first. “You want to go out there.”

Jonathan nods and you feel uneasy. “I trust you won’t try going alone again, right?” It’s a question, but he hears the underlying try and I’ll kill you hidden beneath your words.

“No, not this time… but we might not find anything.” 

“I found something,” Nancy reminds him, which you nod at. She’s the only one out of the three of you who has seen the monster in person, and if you had to place any bets, she’s the one who will be able to figure out what the fuck to do with it. 

Actually, what are you guys going to do?

“Do we, like, have a plan for after we’re done monster sightseeing? Or are we just going to take a look at it and call it a night?” You ask the two of them. 

Nancy bites her lip and looks down, also unsure what exactly the three of you are supposed to do. It’s Jonathan who remains stone faced, and there’s a newfound sense of confidence within him that you’ve never seen when he boldly states, “We kill it.”

“Alright there tough guy,” you hit his chest with your hand and snort. “Sure, we kill it. Obviously.”

“Well, do you have any other ideas? For all we know, Mike and the others will be out there in those woods later looking for Will.”

“We don’t know that-”

“Bug, humor me, how did they find El again?”

You’re silent. He’s right, if you guys don’t go and find this monster before tonight then there’s a high chance the boys and El will find it themselves. Fuck. 

“Nancy,” you say to the girl, “it seems like we’re now officially monster hunters.”

– 

Of course Lonnie has a goddamn handgun just casually stored in his glove box.

You’re not entirely on board with this whole gun situation and apparently Nancy isn’t either, immediately questioning Jonathan when he picks the lock to get the gun.

“What, you want to find this thing and take another photo? Yell at it? Better yet, why doesn’t Y/N just round up the boys and El and have them take it down.”  

“Okay, hey,” you point at Jonathan. “Out of line.” 

He mumbles an apology under his breath while Nancy claims that this is all a terrible idea. You’re not sure where you fall in regards to what’s happening, but you’d say at the moment you’re a solid mix between Jonathan’s no time for nonsense mood and Nancy’s hey let’s slow down hesitation. 

You kick a rock and watch as it dings against Lonnie’s car, which pleases you. “Oh it’s definitely a terrible idea, Nancy. Unfortunately it’s all we have going for us at the moment.” 

Jonathan nods at your words. “She’s right, no one’s going to believe us if we tell them. You know that.” 

“Your mom would.” Nancy responds, jutting her jaw out in defiance. 

You cringe, unsure how Jonathan will respond to what she’s said. Joyce is a sore topic for him, he’s always been so protective of her.

“She’s been through enough,” he sighs, and you hum in agreement. 

Nancy grows more frustrated. “She deserves to know!”

You step in between them. “Look, you’re right. Mrs. Byers deserves to know, but right now she isn’t well enough to handle the idea of her only remaining son actively seeking out a monster that may have taken her other son who could possibly be alive. If we’re wrong or Jonathan gets hurt, it might actually kill her.”

“Yeah, we’ll tell her when this thing is dead.” You note Jonathan’s word choice, saying “when” instead of “if”. In the four years you’ve been his friend, you’ve never seen him so self-assured before. You’d be proud of him if the circumstances weren’t so damn grim. 

“What about the kids?” Nancy finally says after a few seconds of silence. 

“They can’t get involved, I won’t let them.” You tell her and she nods as if expecting you’d say that. 

She gestures over to the funeral home where the crowd of attendees are now gathered for the post burial service. “I know my brother, so you better go and tell him that they need to stay at our house while we deal with the monster. They like you better than they like me, they’ll listen to you if you explain what we’re doing.” 

You’re flattered by her words, honestly. Mike, Dustin, and Lucas listening to you about staying put while you guys go monster hunting? They’d be out the door before you’d be even able to finish saying the phrase “monster hunting”. No way they’ll listen, and you’re about to say exactly that before catching the look Jonathan is giving you. 

You groan at him. “You don’t actually believe they’ll listen to me, right? C’mon, you know those boys as well as I do. This is just a giant DnD game for them at this point.” 

He shrugs, “It doesn’t hurt to try?”

Nancy gives you a hopeful look and bats her eyelashes at you, which, okay, shouldn’t work on you but does. Jonathan does the same, except instead of batting his eyelashes he winks at you and suddenly you’re very confused by the onslaught of emotions that wash over you.

“Ugh, fine. But when they show up in the woods later you guys are on your own!” 

– 

When you step inside the service hall, everyone is gathered into small groups talking amongst themselves. You scan the room for the kids and spot them across the room sitting at a table with Mr. Clark. He’s talking to them about something while holding a paper plate up. You’re not sure what exactly he’s saying to the boys, but they’re leaning in close to him and are listening intently. 

This worries you. 

You try to make your way over as quickly as you can, but being Jonathan’s best friend has some challenges. Every few steps you take you’re stopped by an extended family member of the Byers to ask how you are or a stranger stops to offer you their condolences because you’re close with the family. You do your best to make small talk and thank the people, but you don’t have time to say much else besides, “thank you” or “you were Will’s favorite great aunt”.

By the time you finally get to the table with Mr. Clark and the boys, the man has folded up the paper plate and stabs it with a pen. You really, really don’t want to know whatever the hell this man is explaining to the kids. 

“You create a doorway,” he explains, holding up the plate and smiling at the boys. 

Dustin looks enthralled. “Like a gate?”

“Sure, like a gate. But again, this is all-”

“Theoretical.” Lucas says, nodding his head.

A gate?

What are the odds the boys are talking about a gate to Disneyland?

You sigh, not liking the odds at all.

You slide yourself into Dustin’s chair and force your brother to share with you. He squeaks in surprise and you flash him a tight lipped smile, which causes him to gulp. He knows he’s been busted. 

Mike scoffs at your arrival. “Gee, wonder why you’re here Y/N.”

“Go on, continue this conversation with Mr. Clark here. I wanna hear it.” 

Mr. Clark looks at you uncertainly but Mike simply carries on with the conversation as if you aren’t even here. “But what if this gate already existed?”

“Well, if it did I think we’d know.”

You snort. “Wanna bet?”

Again the man looks at you uncertainly and clears his throat, uncomfortable by your presence. “What I mean to say is that it would disrupt gravity, the magnetic field, our environment.”

“So if there is a gate, it’d be really bad?” You ask, but you already know the answer. 

“Oh, definitely. It might even swallow us up whole!” 

You and the boys look around the table at one another, not at all liking what Mr. Clark is saying. Swallow you guys up whole? That’s not really something you’re interested in. 

Mr. Clark sees your nervousness and shrugs. “Science is neat, but it’s not very forgiving.”

Silence falls upon the table. 

Mr. Clark is such a peachy person.

“Well!” You throw your hands upon the table and the loud noise causes everyone to flinch. “Thank you so much for that lovely information, Mr. Clark. It was truly riveting, but would you mind giving me and the boys a second alone? I just, I want to make sure they’re doing okay after today.” 

You bat your eyes at the man, something you never do, and he clears his throat and excuses himself. The second he’s gone you snap your finger in the boys’ faces. “Hey, listen up. Whatever you guys are planning? Don’t.”

As usual, Mike is the one who argues. “But-”

“No.”

“You don’t even know what we’re-”

“No.”

“Can you at least let me-”

“Sure,”

“Really?”

“No.”

Lucas and Dustin watch the interaction with slight pleasure, amused by your ability to shut Mike up, but when he turns to them for help they reluctantly give in. 

“Y/N,” Dustin sighs, “honestly, how many times are we gonna do this whole ‘we’re not allowed but we’re going to do it anyways’ bit?” 

You glare at your brother. “However many times it takes for you guys to finally listen.”

“Cool. Then we’ll expect you to bust down Mike’s door later tonight.”

“I’m not kidding,” you face all the kids and make sure they’re listening. “Whatever you’re trying to do, don’t. Jonathan and I-”

“You told Jonathan?” Mike exclaims but Lucas shushes him. 

“We’re going to handle it, we already have a plan but whatever you do: stay out of the woods from here on out. We think… We think there’s a monster out there hiding. I just want to make sure you guys are safe.”

“Monster hunting?” Dustin’s eyes light up and you silently curse Jonathan and Nancy for even suggesting you do this in the first place.

“Technically… yes, but you guys absolutely have to stay put.”

They stare at you as if you’re insane.

“You do realize who you’re talking to, right?” Dustin asks. 

You flick his head. “Yes, and I’m putting a lot of trust in you guys right now. I’ll let you guys do whatever you want so long as it doesn’t include the woods. Until you get an all clear from me, it’s off limits.” 

Mike thinks this over. “Can we look for the gate then?”

You sigh. There’s no other way to appease them. “If you don’t go near the woods… then fine.”

The boys begin to cheer, which causes several funeral guests to stare at you with judgment. You realize now that this probably hadn’t been the right setting to have this conversation in. Oh well.

You don’t let the boys cheer for long. “However-”

“There she goes,” Lucas sinks into his seat and squeezes his eyes shut. 

“I get full updates whenever I please. I don’t care if I have to track you guys down from the gates of hell itself, but I will find you and you will tell me everything. Deal?”

Lucas, Dustin, and Mike gather close together and duck their heads down so whisper to one another. You roll your eyes but wait for them to finish. When they’ve reached a decision, Mike interlocks his fingers and places his hands on the table. “You’ve got yourself a deal.” 

– 

As soon as you’ve changed out of your funeral clothes and into a simple pair of jeans and a sweater, Jonathan arrives at your house. You kiss your mom’s cheek before leaving and shout over your shoulder, “Remember the deal, Dustin!” 

You don’t quite catch what your brother responds with but you honestly don’t care enough as you run over to Jonathan’s car and hop into the passenger seat. 

“You certainly didn’t waste any time getting here,” you say in lieu of a hello. 

Jonathan shrugs. “No time to waste when it comes to monster hunting.”

“You do realize that we’re only scouting out the woods tonight, right?” 

You, Jonathan, and Nancy had decided earlier to simply go and explore the woods for any clues of the monster and then figure out how, or even if, you can kill it. 

“I know, but monster hunting sounds cooler.”

“Bless you, bee.” 

The two of you get to the field in no time. Jonathan had been the one to suggest the spot a few yards behind his house for target practice and Nancy had agreed to bring a bat just in case you needed more protection. 

And you?

You’re bringing the cans to serve as targets for shooting. Your family has never owned a gun and last time you checked, Dustin doesn’t play any sports, so all you can offer is your emptied recycling bin contents. 

It doesn’t take long for you and Jonathan to set up the cans on top of the tree trunks before he begins shooting. Jonathan takes a deep breath and holds the gun up so it’s eye level and looks over at you. “Ready?”

You take a deep breath as well and prepare yourself, knowing it’s about to become loud. “Yeah, start shootin cowboy.” 

The first shot hits a tree behind the can, nowhere near its intended target, and you wince. It’s looking like the monster might actually win at the rate Jonathan’s aim is going. 

“It’s okay,” you tell your friend. “The tree looked at me funny, he had it coming.” 

Jonathan snorts. “You’re laughing now, but I can’t exactly hunt a monster if I can’t even shoot it.” 

“Maybe you could talk nicely to it?”

“And say what, exactly? ‘Hey, Mr. Monster, where are you hiding my brother?’”

You step closer to him so that you’re now side by side and you nudge his shoulder. “Hey, you never know. It could work.”

Jonathan readjusts his grip on the gun and aims it once more. He takes another shot, this time it lands a bit closer to the can, but not by much. He lets out an agitated, “Fuck!”

He tries shooting again and again but each shot is as unpredictable as the last. After his sixth round of firing you can see how tense his shoulders are and the way he’s clenching his fists against the weapon. You remember how he acted earlier today, the newfound anger and resentment within Jonathan that had originally impressed you. Now it only frightens you. 

When he goes to re-aim the gun for the seventh time, you grab at his hand and stop him. 

“Bug, what are you-”

“Let’s go for a walk.” 

Jonathan looks at you like you’re crazy but you simply take the gun from his hands, click the safety back on, and then walk over to the tree stumps to rest it against one of them. When you’re done you walk back over to the boy and interlock your fingers with his to drag him along. 

There’s not a whole bunch of room in the clearing for a walk per say, but there’s enough to go a few laps around for Jonathan to take a breather. You’re not sure exactly what’s going on with him but a walk has never hurt anyone. 

Jonathan’s silent the first lap around. You’re content with this and you admire the fall weather and enjoy the slight warmth from the sun as it kisses your face. When you’re on the third lap you decide to ask a question that’s been on your mind since yesterday when Nancy showed up at the funeral home. 

“Do you really believe Will is alive?”

Jonathan thinks the question over for a moment, and as he’s lost in thought you notice that he begins gently swinging your hands back and forth absentmindedly. “I can still feel him.”

“Feel him?”

“Yeah, I know it sounds crazy but…”

“No, I think I get it. I mean, I’d be able to feel if something bad happened to Dustin. I know I’d be able to, even if there’s not necessarily a science behind it. It’s like there’s a lifeline connecting us, like some unspoken sibling thread that neither one of us can sever.”

“A sibling thread?” Jonathan asks, a slight laugh accompanying his question. 

“Oh, you know what I mean, bee.” 

“No, no. I wanna hear all about this thread theory of yours.” 

Jonathan’s bright mood is back, reminiscent of the boy you once believed you knew better than you knew yourself, so you entertain his teasing if only to sustain his light a little longer. “If I explain this theory you have to promise not to laugh at me.”

“I promise,” he says and he gives your hand a light squeeze. 

“Alright, but if you decide I’m insane after this, just know that you legally cannot leave me. You signed a contract.” 

“Oh, did I?”

“You sure did, bee. Anyways, back to me,” a slight breeze surrounds you for a moment and you let the crisp air fill your lungs. “I have this theory that we’re all connected to each other in some way by different threads. Some threads are older than others, stronger, or maybe even more rigid, but they’re there. Whether it’s a thread between you and your family, the love of your life, or a stranger you happen to pass on the street one day, none of it happens by accident.” 

“The threads are the reason it all happens?”

“Not necessarily, but yeah. To put it simply, I guess you could say that.” 

“So, for our thread,” Jonathan stops walking and tugs at you to stop as well. “After everything we’ve been through, all that we’ve done for one another, what thread would you say our’s is?”

His question catches you off guard; you can hear your heart beating within your chest. There’s so many things you wish you could tell him.

Our thread is one of romance, of lovers, of soulmates, even. 

The feelings build within you and the words threaten to spill out. The November sun is beginning to set and everything is golden in its light and Jonathan is a part of it all. His brown eyes are like warm honey on a cold winter morning and his hair is slightly ruffled from the wind that leaves his cheeks flushed and rosy. 

“Our thread,” your voice catches in your throat for a moment. “You know what our thread is, bee.”

He pulls you closer to him and in this moment all you can focus on are the slight freckles that dot across his face and neck. “Do I?”

Jonathan has never, ever looked at you like this before. There’s an intensity within his eyes that frightens you and leaves you feeling bare before him. Does he know? Has he figured it all out?

“I…” You can’t form the words you want to say; the three words that have been weighing upon you feel even heavier than before. They’re thick on your tongue, syrupy and dense and you feel as if you can’t breathe.

“Y/N?” He whispers, but you can only shake your head. 

It’s too much. It’s all too much. 

And then suddenly Jonathan leans in. 

Maybe you’re imagining it. 

Maybe you’re delirious after almost a week of sleepless nights and exhausting encounters. 

Or maybe, just maybe, he feels the same way about you. 

You lean in as well and allow yourself to close your eyes; you believe that just this once you can be selfish and accept more than you may deserve.

“Hey! Guys!”

Nancy’s shout causes you and Jonathan to spring apart. 

You want to scream. 

Of course it’s Nancy fucking Wheeler. 

Jonathan drops your hand and waves the girl over while you stand there, trying to collect yourself. As she walks over, you have just enough pride left over to say, “You know I’d do anything for you, right?”

The question is one Jonathan isn’t expecting. He steps back a bit, now even more aware of the close proximity the two of you had only seconds ago. “Of course I do, bug. You’re my best friend.”

Best friend. 

The words hurt more than they should, really. 

“Right. Best friend, ha.” You step even further away from Jonathan, which he raises his eyebrows at. 

“Did I miss something or…?”

If you had the time, you’d ask him why he wanted to know about the thread between the two of you. Why he looks at you like you’re the most precious thing in the entire room. Why, just minutes ago, he leaned in as if to kiss you. 

But Nancy is now only a couple feet away and it wouldn’t be fair to ask her to give the two of you some privacy. You spot the bat in her hand and it serves as a reminder of what the three of you are here for in the first place. 

Will, Barb, the monster. 

“No, of course not,” you clear your throat and greet Nancy as she arrives. “Hey, Nancy.”

She smiles at you and then says hello to Jonathan. “Hey, where’s the gun?”

You point over to the cans and the tree stumps. “Over there, we just wanted to go for a little walk after shooting a few rounds.”

Nancy nods and walks over to inspect the undamaged cans. “You said you already shot a few rounds?”

Jonathan ducks his head down. “Yeah, well. It’s not as easy as it looks in the movies.” 

“Y/N, did you try shooting?” 

“Pfft, I’m definitely not a weapons kind of girl. I prefer to use my crippling good looks instead.”

While you and Nancy talk, Jonathan walks back over to the gun and reloads it. He motions for the two of you to step back and he shoots a few more times. Not once does he hit the can. You pinch the bridge of your nose and sigh. 

“You’re awful at this, bee.”

“Yeah,” Nancy agrees.

Jonathan looks over at her. “Have you ever shot a gun before?”

She scoffs. “Have you met my parents?”

“I don’t know, Mrs. Wheeler seems like the type to have a hidden gun.” You say, and Nancy waves you off. 

“Well, I haven’t shot one since I was ten. My dad took me hunting on my birthday and made me kill a rabbit.” Jonathan’s words make you frown. Every day he gives you another reason to hate Lonnie. 

Nancy sympathizes with Jonathan and the two of them fall into an easy banter that you’ve never seen before with him. He’s comfortable around her in a way that makes your stomach twist. He tells her about his parents and how they may have loved each other at one point but now no longer do. He’s opening up to her after only a few days of really knowing her. 

Lovely. 

Nancy shares some details about her own family and how she believes her parents never loved each other, which you can relate to. You watch as Jonathan hands her the gun as she explains how her mom had been younger than her father. “He had a cushy job, money, came from a good family. So, they bought a nice house at the end of a cul-de-sac and started their nuclear family.”

“Isn’t it funny how the fathers never seem to suffer the same fate as the mothers?” You ask, and Nancy looks over at you in confusion, so you explain further. “My own parents, they were like yours except the moment my mom was no longer young, my dad left. Found a newer and cheaper model back home in Virginia.” 

“I didn’t know that, I’m sorry Y/N.” 

You shrug. “It’s not like I go and advertise it. Besides, he was an asshole anyways and my mom is better off without him. She’s the sweetest woman in the world who was forced to run back to her family in Hawkins. Nuclear families aren’t all they’re cracked out to be.”

Jonathan ruffles your hair to get you to laugh, which he succeeds in doing. “Screw that.”

 Nancy raises the gun to eye level and closes one of her eyes, her beautiful face now scrunched in concentration. “Yeah, screw that.”

And with that, she shoots a perfectly aimed shot and knocks the can off the stump. You and Jonathan look at her, stunned, but she can only laugh. 

“Damn, Jonathan. Remind me to never piss Nancy off.” You say, still staring at the fallen can. 

Only he doesn’t hear what you’ve said because he’s too busy staring at Nancy. You can tell he’s impressed by her hidden shooting talent and the way she holds herself with such confidence. His eyes shine as he stares at her and he almost seems to come to life whenever she looks back at him. 

Jonathan looks at Nancy and you know he sees what everyone in Hawkins sees: a beautiful, fierce, and incredible girl. 

Nancy Wheeler, the perfect enigma.

Suddenly it clicks. 

Jonathan is in love with her, or at least he’s beginning to fall in love with her. 

You want to hate her. Afterall, she already has Harrington head over heels for her, and yet you can’t blame either one of the boys. She’s perfect and brilliant and everything you’re not. You’d fall in love with her too if you weren’t already in love with someone else. 

You watch as Nancy and Jonathan become lost in their own little world, him helping her reload the gun as she flashes him a shy smile, and you no longer exist near their presence. It feels like a fucking stab to your already open wound of a heart. You watch the way he ducks his head down whenever she looks at him and the way she stares at him when he isn’t looking. 

Nancy shoots a few more rounds and each shot feels like a hammer coming down onto your own coffin. Each time Jonathan looks at her you feel another nail enter. 

Clearly there’s no room for you here. 

Which is fucking ironic given that you’re in a giant field outside. 

You reach for Jonathan’s hand and tug him forward. He gives you a look as if asking is everything okay? and you wish more than ever that things were different between the two of you. You give him a soft shake of the head. “I can feel a headache coming on and I just remembered that I have a shift tonight, so I should get going.” 

He frowns. “But what about the monster? We can’t look for him without you.”

“You’ll be fine without me,” to your horror you can feel tears forming, which you quickly wipe away before Jonathan can notice. “I doubt I’d be any help, anyways. I suck with guns. Nancy’s the professional here.” 

“I mean, I guess, but…” He looks over at Nancy, who is busy firing the gun and hitting every target she aims for, before pulling you even closer to him. “Are we okay? I feel like, I don’t know… like I’m losing you.”

Your breath catches in your throat. He could never, ever lose you, but if you don’t leave now then you’re afraid that maybe you’ll lose yourself. 

“Don’t be silly, bee. You’re not losing me, no matter how much you may want me to.” You try to tease him, but your heart isn’t in it. 

“You didn’t answer my question, Y/N. Are we okay?” He’s looking at you with so much adoration and concern in his eyes that it almost makes you sick. 

“Of course we are. I promise. I think it’s all just catching up to me, if I’m being honest. Between finding Will and tracking down my own brother, I think this monster hunting business may break me.” 

Jonathan eyes you for a moment as if to try and catch you in a lie, but while you’re only telling him this as an excuse to get away from him and Nancy, it’s not technically a lie. You are exhausted. Plus, you really do have a shift. 

The boy scans your face once more before deciding that you’re telling the truth. You know he suspects there’s something else behind your words, but thankfully he doesn’t pry. “Let me tell Nance that I’m driving you home,” 

And there it is again. 

Nance.

The nickname is like a punch to your gut and only solidifies that you should go. “It’s okay, bee. It’s still nice out, figured I’d walk home and get some sun before winter officially takes over Hawkins.” 

“You can’t expect me to let you walk alone now that we know there’s a monster out there taking people, bug.” 

You kiss his cheek, letting your lips linger for a little longer than necessary. “I’ll be careful, I promise. Stay with Nancy and call me tonight after you guys are done scouting around. We’ll figure out where to go from there. Okay?”

You don’t give Jonathan time to argue because you pull away and inform Nancy of your departure. She also frowns at the idea but has already learned that you’re not one to be told what to do. She understands this aspect of you, and you understand it within her as well, so she wishes you goodbye and tells you to stay safe before going back to shooting.

As you leave, you feel Jonathan’s eyes follow after you. 

– 

The walk ends up being more than enough to clear your head. You haven’t had any time to be alone in god knows how long, so it’s nice to have some time to just think and enjoy the quiet. There’s a lot you need to think about, but at the very forefront of your concerns are Will and El. You still have no idea how they’re connected or how the monster comes into play.

Then there’s Steve, oddly enough. 

You’re not really sure why he’s in the midst of your thoughts, but there he is. Smiling at you and laughing at your jokes and telling you that you’re pretty as he instills a carefree sense within you that feels foreign to enjoy. 

As his words ring through your head, you find your thoughts drifting towards Jonathan and the way he holds your hand every time you’re worried about something and the way he kisses your hair after a particularly hard day.

You’re not sure why the two boys almost seem to clash within your mind, but you don’t have time to look into it. Your shift starts soon and god knows how long your coworker Alex can survive on his own if you’re late. 

Work is slow as usual tonight, but you find the downtime a pleasant relief. It gives you the opportunity to skim some new books that shipped in and catch up on some Spidey storylines. In between stocking books and arranging comic displays you find yourself wondering just how true to his word Dustin stayed earlier. 

Like hell those kids really stayed out of the woods. 

Your question is answered as soon as you get home and find your brother crying in his room. Panic immediately swells within your chest and you run over to him.

“What’s wrong?” You check Dustin’s body for any sign of injury and he lets you as he cries, too upset to wave you away. When you’re assured that he’s okay, you feel your heartbeat calm down again. 

Christ, everytime you see this kid he takes ten damn years off of your life. 

You pull a chair from his desk and sit in front of him. “Dustin, do we need to have another code blue?”

“Maybe,” Dustin sniffles, wiping away a few tears. 

“Okay, then code blue. What happened? Is everyone okay? Is it El?” At the mention of the girl’s name, Dustin flinches. Your blood runs cold. “Dustin, what happened with El?” 

“You won’t yell at me?”

You smooth down his always wild hair. “Never during code blue. Please talk to me, bud.”

Dustin explains how he and the group had gone looking for the gate like they told you they would. He explained how they’d followed the train tracks throughout Hawkins for what seemed like hours. 

“The train tracks that go through the same woods I told you not to go in?”

“Like hell we were gonna listen to you.” 

“Yeah, I know.”

This gets Dustin to laugh a bit, which you’re relieved to see, before he continues his story. When he reveals El’s weird behavior and the way she seemed to be hiding something from them, you feel dread creep in. “Did she… Did she do something to prevent you guys from finding the gate?”

“She used her powers to mess with the compass. Lucas found the blood on her jacket.”

You sense that there’s more. “And then?”

“Mike and Lucas… they-they started fighting.” Dustin’s voice breaks, “they started really going at it, and I tried to stop them. I swear I tried, Y/N!”

“Shh,” you reach for his hand to try and calm him down. “I know you did, but I also know how Mike can get when he’s protective of someone and I know that Lucas isn’t El’s biggest fan. It was a recipe for disaster.”

Dustin snorts, “No kidding.” Then his face darkens once more, “but they wouldn’t listen, and that’s when El screamed.” 

“She screamed?”

“I think she was overwhelmed, but she used her powers on Lucas and flung him across the yard and he hit his head pretty hard…”

“She what-”

“She didn’t mean to! She looked really upset after, and Lucas was fine after he woke up-”

“He was knocked unconscious?”

“And then he stormed off and El ran off. We searched for her, but…” 

You stare at your brother in shock. That definitely hadn’t been what you were expecting. El never struck you as a violent girl, but she knocked Lucas out with her mind. Sure, she may have been trying to break up the fight, but you’re willing to bet that she lost control for a moment and Lucas ended up getting hurt as a result.

Maybe you don’t want superpowers. 

“Y/N, have I lost all my friends?” Dustin asks. 

You shush him once more. “No, of course not. You three boys have always been so drastically different from one another, and this week has been one from pure hell. It makes sense that Lucas and Mike finally snapped, but I promise you that they’ll bounce back eventually.” 

“And El?”

“I’m not sure what to make of her,” you admit. “She isn’t violent, I know she’s not. But we also clearly don’t know her as well as we think we do. I just, I need you to be careful around her, okay? Fight for her, defend her like you would for the boys, but be cautious as well.”

“Cautious, got it.” He cocks his head at you, “but what about Lucas and Mike? They’re still friends, right?”

“Of course they are. Just… sometimes friendship can be hard, but it’s almost always worth fighting for. It’s rare to find friends as loyal as Mike or as brave as Lucas or even as sincere as Will. Yet look at you guys, all together; you’re all incredibly lucky to have one another.”

“Lucky like you and Jonathan?” Dustin asks, a sly glint in his eyes. 

You smile, even if he’s teasing you. “Yeah, like me and Jonathan.”

Dustin returns your smile and you squeeze his hand. “Anyways, I say give Lucas some time to calm down. I think he was scared, more than anything. Tomorrow you can try to talk to him again.” 

Your brother nods at your words and he seems better than he did when you first started the conversation, so you open your arms wide and engulf him into a hug. 

“Code blue concluded, I guess.” Dustin mumbles against your chest, which causes the two of you to laugh.

– 

After your talk with Dustin, you head back to your room and wait for Jonathan to call. You glance at the clock and figure that maybe him and Nancy were still out scouting for clues, so you busy yourself with some homework.

When it nears ten at night and the phone still hasn’t rung, you sigh and reach over for the phone on your desk. You dial Jonathan’s number and hope he simply forgot to call, but when no one answers after your fifth time calling: you begin to worry. 

Ya know, maybe it wasn’t your best idea letting him and Nancy go off alone with a monster on the loose. 

You find yourself frantically biking to the Wheeler’s house before you can even think about it. The night blurs past you and as you walk up their driveway and try to rest your bike against their mailbox, a familiar BMW parks next to you. 

“We’ve gotta stop meeting like this, Henderson.” Steve says as he sends you a wink. 

You almost greet the boy before Tommy’s head pops out from the passenger side window. “Hey good lookin.”

You hear Carol berate him and the two begin to bicker as Steve gets out of the car. 

Great. He brought the idiots.

Steve walks over and takes your bike from your hands. After a couple seconds of repositioning and balancing, he finally manages to get the bike to stay upright. “Tada!”

“I almost had it,” you glare at him. 

“Sure ya did.”

Steve’s presence is frustrating as always, but you spot Jonathan’s car parked down the street and Carol’s shrill voice becomes increasingly irritating. You don’t have time for this right now. “What are you doing here, Harrington?”

“I could ask you the same thing.” When you glare at him, he finally says, “Nancy promised she’d call me but hasn’t, so I wanted to check on her.”

His sincerity is why you say, “I’m here for…” You realize you can’t necessarily tell Steve about Jonathan possibly being here. You have a feeling it wouldn’t end well, but you’re also not keen on lying to the boy. You’re already keeping secrets from practically everyone in your life; you don’t want to add Steve to the list. Not when he doesn’t deserve it. 

“I’m looking for Jonathan,” you confess, worried about Steve’s reaction. 

He frowns. “Why would Byers be here?”

“Him and Nancy have this… thing for english. Due tomorrow. A big thing. Like, huge. So they’re working on it together. In the house. Where Nancy lives. Here.” You stumble over your words, more nervous than usual, but you weren’t expecting Steve to be here or that you’d need a cover story. 

“Uh huh,” something almost aggressive flickers across Steve’s face and you silently curse to yourself. You said the wrong thing. 

“Funny, Nancy told me she was only helping Byers for the funeral.” 

Shit.

Tommy and Carol watch from the car, obviously amused by the whole situation. 

“Right! She was, now she’s working on an assignment with him.” Technically not a lie, you’re just omitting the fact that the assignment in question is monster hunting. 

“You’re really bad at lying, Henderson.” Steve walks past you, now over the conversation, and you struggle to keep up. You try to block his path, assuming that he’ll use the front door, but as you near the front step he side steps you and starts heading towards the bushes. 

“What are you doing?” You whisper loudly, trying not to draw too much attention to yourself. 

Steve ignores your whispered yelling and jumps on top of the radiator. Once he’s up, he begins to pull himself over the overhang and up onto the roof. There’s a window just above the ledge with a light on, which you presume to be Nancy’s room due to the practiced ease in which Steve scaled the house. 

You don’t try to climb up after him in fear that you’ll only end up embarrassing yourself. “Ya know, Mrs. Wheeler loves me, I could’ve just knocked on the door.”

Steve peers down at you, an easygoing smile now back on his face. “Relax, this is quicker. Besides, you gotta admit it was impressive to watch.”

Again he winks at you and you feel your cheeks flush. He’s right, it had been impressive to watch; he had made it look so easy. While you struggle to come up with a witty retort, Steve almost knocks on Nancy’s window before his smile drops.

You notice the way his face hardens. “Steve?”

He doesn’t respond, which only concerns you more. You begin to think about the millions of possibilities surrounding Nancy, Jonathan, and monster hunting; fear creeps in. “Is Nancy there? Is she okay?”

“Of course you’d be worried about Nancy right now,” Steve laughs bitterly. You frown at his words, unsure what they mean, but before you can ask anything else Steve angrily climbs back down.

“Steve, what-” He pushes past you in a frenzied hurry to get to his car, but you grab his jacket and force him to stop. “Answer me! Is Nancy okay? Was Jonathan with her?”

Steve whips around and sneers at you. “Why do you even care about them? About him?”

“Because we’re friends,” you say, and for the first time you really mean it. Nancy has become someone you’d call a friend. 

Another cruel laugh escapes Steve’s lips. “Friends, huh? Yeah, those two looked real fucking cozy in her bed.”

A wave of nausea hits you.

“W-what?” You drop your hand and release his jacket. 

“It’s incredible, really. Byers has some fucking nerve.” Steve runs a hand through his hair in agitation and begins to pace. You’re too numb to stop him. “I mean, look at you! He has everything he could possibly want, but he decides to go after my girlfriend.”

“It’s not like that-” 

“Did he tell you they’d be in her room, alone in her bed, underneath her blanket?”

More nausea hits you. “No,”

They were supposed to look for any signs of the monster in the woods. That’s all he told me, you think. 

“So he’s a liar, too.” Steve scoffs, “you deserve better, Y/N.”

And with that, he heads back to his car and drives away, leaving you standing alone once more in the Wheeler’s driveway. You get a sense of deja-vu, watching Steve’s BMW descend down the street, but only this time there’s no warmth fluttering within your stomach as he leaves. 

All you feel is nausea. 

You don’t remember the bike ride home; you’re not sure how you even made it back safely without crashing into anything. All you remember is that you cried the entire way. 

You’ve lost Jonathan, there’s no denying that now. He’s Nancy’s, wholly and truly, he’s hers. 

He was never yours in the first place, you remind yourself. 

But if he was never yours in the first place, then why does it feel like you were almost something?

No. 

You don’t want to think about it that way. 

Yours or not, you can’t afford to lose Jonathan. 

Something or everything, you’ll take whatever you can when it comes to him. 

Everything, anything, nothing. Whatever he gives you, you know you’ll cling onto it with all that’s within you.

But your friendship with Jonathan is too precious to lose, too meaningful to let stupid feelings ruin it. You refuse to let anything come between your friendship with him, and you swear to yourself to shove everything down. Every hurt feeling, all the pain stabbing within your chest, you force it all down to focus on finding Will. 

He’s all that matters right now, even if it feels like the thread connecting you to Jonathan has begun to wither.

Will has to come first. 

You have to find him, something good and lovely has to come from this. You can’t let this all be for nothing.

-

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[jo-harrington]

Lack of Faith (Eddie Munson)

Summary: Eddie Munson. Dungeon Master, Rock Star Wannabe, King of the Freaks and the Nerds. Can you believe that he doesn't like Star Wars?

Characters: Eddie Munson, Corroded Coffin, Wayne Munson, Dustin Henderson, Mike Wheeler, Lucas Sinclair

Themes/Warnings: Our nerdy boy being a nerd, and his nerdlings making him worse, Star Wars references, might borrow some dialogue from the movie Fanboys (2009), boys will be boys, angst-ish, hurt/comfort-ish?, friendship, reference to some FOI characters, don't worry about it.

Note: This has been a thought that's lingered in my mind for quite some time as I am a HUGE Star Wars fan. And a little talk with @br0ck-eddie today (an unrelated topic) brought this back to the forefront of my mind. Tagging @fracturedarkness and @courtingchaos for no reason other than "you'll like it."

This is not an xReader fic. This is about Eddie and Star Wars and if you nerf-herders can't accept that, you can get the kriff out of here. IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT JIZZ IS, KEEP FUCKING MOVING NORMIE.

You can find my masterlist here.

Please do not interact if you are not 18+.

Enjoy!

---

It was a normal lunch period.

Well, as normal as it could be when you sat at Hellfire Club's table in the cafeteria. There was no talk of homework, or dates, or crushes.

Instead Gareth was tapping a beat against the edge of the table with two unsharpened No.2 pencils, Dave was working on a new character sheet with Eddie after he suffered a tragic and untimely death during their last session, and the freshman were arguing about something down at their end of the table.

Their heads were bent together, occasionally Mike would throw his head back and groan, and then get right back to his furious whispers. And although Eddie, gracious and fearless leader that he was, was typically grateful that they kept their mindless drivel to themselves, today he was curious.

He could hear little tidbits of their conversation and they intrigued him enough:

"...they still kissed."

"That was to make Han jealous."

"That was the second time, what about the first time?"

"The first time they were about to die!" Dustin got to his feet now, staring at Mike with wide, incredulous eyes. "They were swinging ten-thousand feet in the air!"

"Hey!" Eddie shouted at them now, as kids at the surrounding tables started to stare and laugh. And usually, yes, he'd flip them off, tell them to mind their own business. Pull the whole freak card to get them to look away. The freshman needed to learn when to not place a target on their own backs; he hopefully wouldn't be here to protect them forever. "Shut up! Sit down!"

The three boys immediately clamped their mouths shut and Dustin sunk back into his seat as the older boys snickered.

"What's so important that you're about to start throwing punches over there?" Eddie questioned. The boys seemingly made themselves smaller and Eddie had to sigh. "Come on, I'm not gonna bite your heads off."

The entirety of Hellfire Club shot a skeptical look at him and his rolled his eyes.

"M-maybe you can help us," Mike suggested. "We're in the middle of a debate."

"A debate? What kind of debate?"

"One of the utmost importance," Dustin said desperately. "Because Mike is insane."

"I am not! You're the one who's lost it. 'There's something innate.' Did we even watch the same movie?"

The boys all started to bicker again, louder this time, and Eddie needed to whistle to get them to quit it.

"See that's not very helpful. Why don't you tell me what movie, and what the problem is, and I can offer final and absolute judgement."

"Because you're right all the time," Jeff muttered under his breath to Gareth, causing Eddie to toss an eraser at him good-naturedly.

"Star Wars," the three freshman all answered simultaneously, and then they started talking over each other about whether Luke and Leia knew they were siblings when they kissed or if he had a thing for Leia and if Han was really weirded out by it all when he found out.

They were so caught up in their explanation that they didn't notice the members of Corroded Coffin get all tense, or the way that Eddie began to clench his fists and grit his teeth.

Until aforementioned lead guitarist stood up himself and hauled his backpack over his shoulder. They all stared at him, his bandmates with fearful eyes, and the freshman with hopeful ones.

"Easy," Eddie answered with a sardonic smile. "Star Wars is a dumb shit movie and you shouldn't waste your breath arguing over it."

And he walked past his friends just as the bell rang signaling the end of the period.

---

"What do you mean you don't like Star Wars?"

"Drop it Henderson."

"Is it...are you more of a Trek fan? Is that it?"

"It's not--"

"Because it's ok if you are! I like Star Trek too. I got Vulcan ears for Christmas last year and I have the new Klingon dictionary on hold at Waldenbooks. Pretty sure I'm already better at it than Latin."

"Do you not understand the meaning of drop it?" Eddie slammed his locker shut and stared at the younger boy. "I just don't like it. It's...it's--"

"It's a cultural phenomena!" Dustin cut him off. "It's only the most detailed and expansive fictional universes I've ever experienced. Even better than Tolkien."

"That's blasphemy," Eddie scoffed.

"Ok maybe not Tolkien," Dustin conceded, hands held out innocently. "But seriously, it's insane. I thought that you'd be all over it. I was gonna even talk to you about helping me plan a small one-shot for Lucas' birthday set in the Star Wars universe. I would DM!"

Eddie, though annoyed with the topic conversation, fondly pushed the bill of Dustin's hat over his eyes.

"Come on!"

"Listen I'll help you," Eddie promised. "Whatever you wanna cook up for Sinclair's birthday, I'm your guy. I'll even get the guys to come and play if you want a bigger group. Just anything but Star Wars ok?"

He started to walk away but Dustin was hot on his heels, dodging other students left and right to stay in-step with Eddie.

"Why not? Just give me one good reason why you don't like Star Wars, and I'll drop it. Is it because Obi-Wan wasn't secretly Luke's father? Or..." He fumbled over his words, struggling to find a reason that his friend didn't like one of his favorite series. "Or...because Wedge was a better pilot than Luke but somehow Luke was the star of the Rebel Alliance."

"Stop it now."

"Do you not like C-3P0? No one likes C-3P0! Wait...is that your favorite character and you don't like the movie because everyone else hates him?"

Dustin was sure he'd hit the nail on the head and offered explanations and tried to convince Eddie that he was all wrong. And all of it fell on annoyed ears until Eddie, at his wits end, turned and grabbed Dustin by the shoulders. He stopped them dead in their tracks in the middle of the hallway, uncaring of the other students groans and insults as they pushed past.

"I don't like Star Wars," Eddie said through gritted teeth, a sense of finality in his words so the subject could be dropped once and for all. "Because I've never seen the movies. And I don't want to. They're overhyped, and dumb, and just a way to get little idiots like you to spend their money on posters and action figures and life savers."

"Lightsabers," Dustin corrected him, but then backtracked. "Wh--Eddie? What do you mean? You have to have seen them! Ed...Eddie wait!"

The metalhead let him go and the quickly retreated into the crowd leaving Dustin to call after him, confused.

---

Of course, news spread to the other freshman quickly. Dustin was devastated, Lucas was lost, and Mike felt betrayed that his role model--loose definition--hadn't seen the movies that shaped him as a person to this day. Shaped all of them.

Into nerds.

Even Max was surprised to hear that her neighbor hadn't seen it, as she was dragged to the depths of the Wheeler's basement along with the boys to discuss how this all could have happened.

They thought of everything. Body swaps and mind control. A curse! Mike was dead set on Eddie being a die-hard trekkie and, as someone who disliked the Trek himself, got irrationally angry about it.

"I swear he didn't even bat an eye when I told him about the Klingon!" Dustin exclaimed. "I just...I don't know."

"Well have you asked the rest of the geek patrol?" Max questioned, and all the boys turned to stare at her. "If Eddie hates it so much that he doesn't want to talk about it, the others have known him for a lot longer than any of us have. They're bound to know something right?"

"See this?" Dustin snapped his fingers and pointed at her. "This is why we need you in Hellfire. Eddie wouldn't be able to trick us anymore, you'd see right through it."

"Not gonna happen," she deadpanned.

The boys protested her refusal to play DnD with them, but took her advice and ran with it.

For a solid week, they pestered Jeff, Gareth, and Dave. And for a solid week, the older boys refused to budge. They tried everything. Bribes, blackmail, threats.

"You think," Gareth laughed when the boys cornered him outside the locker room before PE. "That I'm gonna tell you anything after you threaten to have Steve Harrington beat me up? That guy might've been a big douchebag few years ago, but I know he's a loser working at Family Video now."

All hope was lost as he was about to head to class. Until Mike spotted someone out of the corner of his eye, leaving the athletics hall for their next class, and he was struck with inspiration. He called out to Gareth.

"What if I can get you one of my sister's bras?"

Gareth skidded to a halt and looked over his shoulder with shock and, surprisingly, intrigue.

"...go on," he nodded.

Thus, a negotiation was made before the coach blew his whistle. And a few days later after school, at the picnic table out in the woods behind the football field, the exchange took place.

"Gimme the goods," Gareth held his hand out for his bounty.

"Story first, bra later," Lucas scoffed at him. "Otherwise what's to stop you from taking it and leaving."

Gareth clenched his hands and then let out a long-suffering sigh.

"At least lemme see what color it is."

The three freshman ducked their heads together to discuss the risks, and then Mike unzipped his backpack and flashed the tiniest peak of pastel purple lace at him.

"Nice," Gareth nodded. "Alright! You better not have anywhere else to go, we're gonna be here for a little while."

"My mom's not coming to get us until 6," Dustin agreed.

Gareth then took the time to weave the tale. One he heard from Jeff, who heard it from some guy named Dougie, who heard it from a girl named Ronnie, who only knew about it because she was there.

"It's his closely kept secret," Gareth explained. "Ronnie was still here when I was a freshman, and she wouldn't say shit about it. Which is why this can never make it back to me."

"We swear," the boys said simultaneously, and all crossed their hearts.

Apparently, Eddie had been all excited for the very first Star Wars movie when it first premiered. He saw the posters for it at the Hawk and babbled on and on about what it might be about. He'd always been a little interested in space, thanks to Star Trek--

"I knew it!" Dustin exclaimed.

"God damn it!" Mike cursed. "He's a Trekkie!"

"Are you gonna let me tell this story?" Gareth hissed.

"Sorry," Lucas apologized and slugged both of his friends in the arm.

--and he thought Star Wars was gonna be the next big thing. He was sure of it. Not only that, it was gonna be his new favorite thing. He was hesitant to ask his dad to buy tickets for the two of them to go and see the movie together. What with money being tight and his dad's unreliable presence. Still, he heard that the local radio station was giving two tickets away and he called and called and called until he won them.

"Wow," Mike was awestruck. "Two tickets for the opening day of Star Wars. Can you imagine? What a lucky son of a bitch."

"Uh," Dustin watched Gareths shifting eyes and pursed lips. "Mike I think you're forgetting something."

"What?"

"He didn't see it, dipshit," Gareth sneered. "Duh. Isn't that the whole point of you guys bothering me with this? Did you forget?"

Eddie, excited for the day, told his dad, Al, two weeks in advance. He and Ronnie had picked up the tickets for the show after school one afternoon, lying to Ronnie's grandma about having detention. And Al Munson, father of the year, promised that he would be around to take Eddie.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," he said and flashed his charming smile at his young and hopeful son. "We can make a day of it, how's that? You got the tickets, I've got dinner at Benny's afterwards. And you can get a sundae for dessert."

Eddie was over the moon, happy that his dad was finally excited for something that he enjoyed. He couldn't be bothered with Lord of the Rings or Narnia or any of the other stories that Eddie enjoyed, but he was excited for this. Probably because it had Wars in it. But that was ok. Beggars couldn't be choosers.

And then the morning finally came. A Wednesday in May, almost time for summer break. Al was sitting on the couch looking at something in the newspaper and Eddie reminded him about the movie before he left to catch the school bus. Al simply patted him on the head and promised to pick him up at 3 so they'd have plenty of time to get a good seat and watch the previews.

"And then the asshole never showed up," Gareth scoffed and broke all the kids hearts.

They didn't know a whole lot about Eddie's dad; he purposefully said precious little except that he was in jail and "belonged there, good riddance." If a good word was said about anyone in Eddie's family, it was said about his uncle Wayne. And even then it was scarce. Hearing this whole story though instantly put a bad taste in their mouths about the elder Munson.

Gareth continued the story, telling them how Eddie sat at one of the picnic tables for his dad until Ronnie and her grandma offered to drive him to the theater so at least he could see the movie. Ronnie even offered to see it with him. But Eddie refused.

"He was sure that his dad was coming. Waited there for hours. Until the movie had started, and then was over. And then he walked home alone."

"But..." Mike frowned. "But then why didn't he try again? Why didn't he go to see it when Empire came out...or...or Lucas...remember when your dad took us to see Return of the Jedi a couple years ago? And we tried to get him to take us all to the midnight showing of the whole trilogy?"

"Yeah! He told us we were crazy for wanting to sit there for 8 whole hours."

"But he didn't wanna see it," Gareth shook his head. "That's the whole point. His dad pissed him off, and now...he's written it all off. He refuses, because...I guess he doesn't wanna admit how upset he was. I don't even know if he cried! Ronnie never told anyone what happened afterwards. We all just know not to say anything about Star Wars around him."

Gareth got his bounty in the end and left, and the three freshman all sat there, defeated.

"I almost wish he was a trekkie," Mike said sadly.

"My dad's left us and it's still somehow not that bad," Dustin whispered.

"Listen," Lucas straightened his shoulders and looked at his friends. "This...man it really sucks, but we can't just give up. Eddie deserves to know all the ups and downs of Star Wars. He would love it. Probably more than the three of us combined. Hell, even Max thought so!"

The other boys nodded in agreement and sat upright as Lucas got to his feet.

"Are we just gonna sit here and let our friend who always looks out for us miss out on the best thing that he's ever seen just cuz his dad's a big asshole? Or are we gonna look out for him too?"

Mike and Dustin clapped and cheered and whooped.

And then the three of them got out their notebooks and began to scheme.

---

Eddie rang the doorbell of the Wheeler's house and waited silently on the porch, hands fiddling with the small gift and binder in his hands.

9am was too fucking early for a birthday party, in his opinion, but for the kids--for Lucas--and for Dungeons and Dragons...eh...he could stand to lose some sleep on a Saturday.

As long as they were done by 7 so he could go make a few bucks at Matt Donovan's party over on Elm. He'd lose out on sleep, but not cash.

The door opened and a tired-looking Ted Wheeler looked Eddie up and down with a sigh, then waved him in.

"They're all downstairs," he droned. "Snacks and sodas in the kitchen. Karen's gone to the store to get more. We're ordering pizza for lunch and there'll be cake a little later."

"Great," Eddie gave him a stiff nod. "Thanks."

Ted grumbled something about "having enough birthday parties for his own three kids let alone their friends too" and Eddie rolled his eyes.

Asshole.

He kicked off his sneakers in the pile by the stairs to the basement and then shuffled down the steps, eager to join his favorite group of idiots for a day of fantasy escapism.

And he was excited; it had been a while since he'd gotten to play one of his characters and Dustin had put together a fantastic campaign for Lucas.

Only...when Eddie got to the basement, he was in for a shock.

No tables and chairs, no dice, no maps or figures. No binders or books or character sheets. Nothing.

Just his friends all sitting together on and around the couch facing the tv set that had been set up in front of it.

With lightsabers in their hands.

They all cheered when they saw Eddie, Lucas the loudest of all.

Well, not all of them. Jeff, Gareth, and Dave all looked about ready to run. Especially when they saw the scathing look on Eddie's face.

"You're finally here!" Lucas laughed. "You're late.

"Happy Birthday," Eddie deadpanned and threw the gift to him. "What the hell is going on here?"

"What does it look like?" Dustin snarked. "It's Lucas' birthday."

"It was supposed to be Dungeons and Dra--"

"Well, I changed my mind," Lucas said smugly. "I thought...you know what, save it for the summer so we can make it longer than just a one-off campaign. Dustin worked really hard on it after all."

Eddie couldn't deny that. Still he glared at the plastic...toys that the boys all held.

"And you just happened to pick Star Wars?" he asked, arms crossed over his chest as he eyed them all skeptically.

"It's my favorite," Lucas insisted. "Not the first time I've had a Star Wars themed party. First time we're watching the trilogy all the way through though."

"Yeah cuz someone fell asleep last time we tried," Dustin jabbed Mike in the shoulder with his lightsaber pointedly.

"That's why we're starting so early this time," Mike parried with a jab to Dustin's stomach.

"So," Lucas stared Eddie down with challenge in his eyes. "Are you just gonna stand there and ruin my party? Or are you gonna sit down? Because we're never gonna get to Empire by the time the pizza gets here if we don't start soon."

Eddie stared at the hopeful expressions in all of his friends--his little sheeps--faces. Even the ones who were familiar with his feelings about the franchise.

And he weighted his options.

Eddie was a man who abided by the code. He'd gotten burned to many times in life not to. And that code included things like never trust your dad, rich people are assholes, popular girls are bad news. Somewhere in that list though, between always change your underwear when you think they're still clean and shake the can of soda before you hand it to your friends was never watch Star Wars.

It'd been that way for years.

But since the start of the school year, since Eddie had met these three kids...he'd started changing his code.

Steve Harrington wasn't an asshole. Well he used to be, but he proved that he could change.

Not all popular girls were bad news. Nancy was helping him work towards a better grade in biology and the student council president had slipped her number into Eddie's locker the other day.

And while there might be things that would never change--his father wasn't trustworthy, end of story--he figured...for his friends he might be able to bend some of his self-imposed rules.

Eddie sighed and looked at television screen with the words A Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far, Far Away... frozen, and he felt a little pang in his heart.

And if he could do things like that for his friends...

His inner 10-year old self was sitting at that picnic table still, waiting for the van to pull into the parking lot. Only this time, he wasn't left high and dry. This time a much older Eddie drove up and popped open the van doors for little Eddie to hop in. They could finally fulfill this dream together.

...he certainly could do things like that for himself.

"Alright," he closed the distance and pushed his way through his friends so he could plop front and center on the floor in front of the television. He tried to keep the sour attitude, but as a blue plastic lightsaber was pressed into his hands, he couldn't help but crack a smile. "Let's see what all the hype is about."

The group cheered and Gareth pressed play on the remote.

And as the swell of music began and STAR WARS flashed on the screen, Eddie said aloud...

"Hey guys, what if it sucks?"

[apomaro-mellow]

By some miracle, Steve was able to carry Eddie's corpse through the gate. It was a great weight, not just physically but emotionally. Steve had never....he'd had brushes with death sure but never actually touched...it didn't matter. What did matter was that Eddie wasn't exactly dead as it turned out.

The forces that controlled the Upside Down were unexplainable and also had shit timing. Because sometime between Steve confirming that was no pulse and Eddie's funeral, a change had occurred.

Wayne made it open casket, which was pretty lucky because otherwise they wouldn't have caught it. When people were allowed the come up and view the body to say their final goodbyes, Steve went up with Dustin. Wayne looked on solemnly, knowing Dustin rather well but still being pretty much a stranger to Steve. Dustin was beside himself, tears streaming down for the entire service and blurring his vision.

It was always harder for Steve to make the tears come, no matter how distraught he was. But with his eyes clear, he was able to see just the tiniest movement of Eddie's eyes under his lids. And then the teeniest lift of a lid, as if trying to catch a peek.

Holy shit Eddie was alive.

Holy shit there was a room full of people who thought he was dead.

Holy shit there was a town outside this room who thought he was a devil worshipper.

Steve cleared his throat. "Can I have a moment alone with him?", he asked Wayne but Dustin was the one that responded in confusion.

"You?", he said through sniffles.

"I'm the one that....found him, remember? I just wanna apologize for not getting there in time."

Dustin was quick to say Steve wasn't at fault and that he should've been the quicker one but Steve hushed him, and gently pushed him away. Wayne still looked skeptical, wanting to protect his nephew even when physical harms were no danger to him anymore.

"Please?", Steve begged.

Only then did Wayne leave to sit back down. Now it was just Steve and Eddie. Steve leaned in closer, like he was whispering an apology to the deceased.

"I know you're not dead."

"Yeah, no shit", Eddie hissed in a raspy voice.

Steve had so many questions his head was spinning, least of all how Eddie got through the embalming process but the important part was figuring out how to get him out of here. And there didn't seem to be a perfect plan to put to action.

"How long can you hold your breath?"

"Not really a problem for me anymore", Eddie confessed.

"Great. See you in six hours."

Steve was sure if he could, Eddie would've launched out and reached for him not to go. So he had to mentally commend him on his restraint.

Nothing could be done in a room full of people, even if more than half of them knew of the crazy shit that went down. So the only course of action was to wait until nightfall and dig Eddie out. He could explain to the others while they were waiting for the time to pass.

----------------------------

True to his word, six hours later, Steve, Dustin, Jonathan, and Mike were out in the cemetary after hours, digging into Eddie's fresh grave. The moment the casket was free and popped open Eddie jolted from it like a livewire and latched onto the first person he saw, Steve.

"You came back for me", Eddie was panting despite not having a need for air anymore. "Twice."

Steve swallowed, having dropped his shovel to put his arms around Eddie. "Yeah. 'Course. Always." He felt Eddie's hand come up the back of his neck and felt his pulse race.

"Uhh, since when are you two this buddy-buddy?", Mike asked.

Steve rolled his eyes, moment, or whatever had been happening ruined. Eddie finally looked to the others but didn't immediately pull away from Steve.

"I see that you still have that stick up your ass Wheeler."

"HOLY SHIT!" Dustin screamed into the night before pouncing, nearly taking both grown men down in his exuberance. Steve was just barely able to pull away to let the other two embrace.

Dustin was holding onto Eddie like a life line. If it had been hard for Steve to carry Eddie's then-dead body, actually seeing the cause and cradling him as he died must've done terrible things for Dustin.

Jonathan, ever the pragmatist, had already begun refilling the grave. "You know, we probably could've figured something out at the funeral if you let us in on this, Steve."

"And deny this drama queen the honor of literally rising from the grave? How could I?", Steve pointed out as he started to help Jonathan. "That's how you would've wanted it, right Eddie?"

Eddie was still soothing Dustin by rubbing his back as he spoke. "I definitely could've done without the sitting in tight, closed, darkness for hours but it gave me some time to come up with a killer album idea." And if that idea included being saved by a chivalrous white knight, well that could be kept close to the chest until he actualized it.

[ladykailitha]

A Valentine’s Day to Remember Eddie’s POV Part 1

This technically part 2. It will help to read this first. There are three parts like with the first story and will be put up once a day. I will tag for future parts if you want to be tagged, let me know. Preferably in the comments (I might miss them if you hide them in the tags ;) )

And the last part WILL be spicy. I will put the +18 under the cut so you know when it starts.

*

The Corroded Coffin boys were getting tired of Eddie mooning over Steve fucking Harrington. They didn’t have a problem with the guy himself. He had been a little douche-y in high school but they were so beyond the realm of King Steve that they weren’t even on the fucking map.

Nope.

The problem was how Eddie kept talking him up.

“Dude,” Brian sighed. “Just ask him out. You know he’s bi. You know he hasn’t dated in months. Just...something. Please, you’re killing us.”

Eddie growled. “It’s fine for you lot. You’ve all got girlfriends. You know, people you can actually take out in public and be all over without people throwing bricks at you.”

Jeff raised a single eyebrow at him.

Eddie deflated. “I know it’s hard for you and Kelsey, too. But of the two of us, I am more likely to get beaten to death for loving a boy then you are for dating a white girl.”

Jeff cocked his head to the side and then nodded. “Fair enough.”

“So go out of Hawkins for your date,” Gareth suggested. “Take him somewhere that even if people saw two dudes, they wouldn’t immediately clock you as couple.”

Eddie sighed. “This is King Steve with all the Harrington moves and shit. In what world would I be able to take him out on a date that he hasn’t been on a dozen times before.”

The other boys shared glances and grimaces. Eddie had a point.

Brian clapped Eddie’s shoulder. “You’ll come up with something. You always do.”

*

Eddie walked into Family Video to return a tape and chat with his two favorite employees.

They weren’t at the front so he wandered around trying to find them when he heard Steve whining to Robin: “I’m just going to work and then hide in my room until the fifteenth and hope to hell not too many couples come in looking for a romantic movie to ignore after fifteen minutes while they make out.”

Holy shit. This was perfect.

So Eddie did the smart thing and offered to take Steve out. Create the perfect date. Because from what it sounded like, everyone wanted the Harrington ExperienceTM but not actually Steve. And that was positively heartbreaking.

But now he had to plan. And one week to do it in. Eddie wasn’t worried, though. He had put together a four hour one-shot in thirty minutes. He just needed to do a little research first.

First stop: Nancy Wheeler

*

When Nancy came by after Hellfire Club to pick up Mike and Will Eddie pulled her aside for a moment.

“Hey, soo...” he hummed. “Not be all awkward or anything, but I’m taking Steve out for Valentine’s day and I kinda wondered...”

Nancy folded her arms and huffed. “You want to know what our dates were like?”

Eddie nodded shoving his hair in front of his face.

“Just normal date things,” she said. “Dinner and movies and stuff like that.”

Eddie frowned. “You didn’t do anything fun?”

“It was fun,” she insisted. He raised a questioning eyebrow. “It was! Though, I think a couple of previous girlfriends broke him of doing spontaneous stuff like picnics and bowling.”

“That’s really depressing, Wheeler,” Eddie said softly.

Nancy sighed. “Yeah, it kinda was. He liked that sort of thing, but I think the girls were expecting to be wined and dined because his parents were rich.”

“Noted,” he said. “Thanks.” He patted her on the shoulder and smiled.

She cocked her head to the side as he walked away. ‘You don’t want to know things like his favorite color or favorite dish or anything like that?”

Eddie turned around and grinned. “Where’s the fun in that?”

She threw her arms in the air in frustration as he just skipped away.

*

His first stop after talk with Nancy and finding out Steve’s favorite flower, was the florist.

The little bell chimed over head as he walked in.

A very harried looking woman at the counter looked up at him in dread. “If you want roses you’re shit out luck. There is no place in the surrounding area that has them. Please don’t ask.”

Eddie grinned. “Then you, fair lady are in luck. Because I’m not looking for roses.”

She eyed him skeptically. “Yeah? What are you looking for then?”

He pulled out the piece of paper Steve had given him. “All-strow-mary-ahs?”

Her face cleared of fatigue and she blinked. “Alstroemarias?”

Eddie beamed. “That’s the one. I’m looking for six pink and six red.”

“Come with me,” the florist said waving him to follow her to the back room. Eddie bounced up to her and let her lead him to the cooler that held all her remaining flowers. The biggest section held these small lilies of every color. Orange, purple, blue, white, pink, red, even some with multiple colors.

“Are you sure you just want pink and red?” she asked, waving her arm at her selection.

“All these are al-alstr-” he stammered.

“I just call them alstroes,” she said taking pity on him. “It’s easier.”

Eddie sighed in relief. “So all these are alstroes?”

She nodded. “Pretty flower.”

He could only agree. The red ones were bright and not dark the way roses tended to be and the pink ones were the color of the blush on Steve’s cheeks when Eddie told him it was a unique choice. He loved them.

Eddie hummed. “Yup, just the two colors, please.”

The florist smiled. “When do you want them delivered?”

He blinked. “Um...would it…I mean, I would like to pick them up myself, if that’s okay.”

She shrugged. “Sure. People just prefer to get them delivered because the store could be pretty hectic that day.”

Eddie sighed in relief. “No, no. I want to hand them to them directly.”

If she noticed the absence of any gendered pronoun she wisely said nothing. “You can also write a card to go with if you’d like. Or you can choose a standard greeting.”

Eddie pursed his lips together and licked them nervously. “I’d like to write it myself.”

She handed him the card and a pen. He carefully wrote out the note, blushing darker than flowers he was about to buy.

He handed her the card back, shoving hair into his face.

The florist looked at the card and smiled. “The language of flowers. So that’s why you wanted the specific colors.”

Eddie nodded. “I got a book out from the library. Wanted to make Valentine’s day extra special.”

She filled out the order form and using a paper clip added the card to the front of it.

“When would you like to pick up the flowers?” she asked.

“4pm.”

She wrote it down. “All right that will be $3.95.”

Eddie pulled out his wallet and paid the amount. This was the hardest part. Spending the money to make Steve happy. Not that he thought he had to spend a lot on Steve. No, the problem was that Eddie wanted to. But he also knew he had to keep to a budget as to not completely blow this out of proportion.

*

Whenever Eddie needed to know something over the course of the week, he would just ask Steve. Because just because his favorite color was green two years ago didn’t mean that it was still his favorite color. Which coincidentally it wasn’t.

Steve had called it baby blue but it was more cerulean. It was a pretty color blue if Eddie was pressed. It certainly brought out the hazel in his brown eyes.

Which was not a thing Eddie noticed. No. Nope. Nope. Not at all.

He called the florist to update the order to new color of tissue paper to wrap the flowers in. The florist nearly sobbed in relief when he said he didn’t want pink, red, or white.

Eddie had agreed to take his sheep to the arcade because he was going to be busy on Saturday. He knew that realistically that most of them had dates anyway, and wouldn’t want play that day either, but it was still something he could do for them instead of DMing that week.

“Look, man,” Eddie was complaining to Dustin, “I have a budget for this shit, I can’t just go to the fanciest restaurant in town and drop $20 on dinner. Not to mention this late in the game, there is no way I’m even going to get a foot in the door let alone get a reservation.”

They were waiting in the Wheeler’s front room on Mike, who was taking forever.

Nancy’s eyes narrowed.

“I’m coming with you to drop the kids off,” she announced just as Mike walked out.

“What? Why?” Mike asked.

“Because I need to go to the store, and Eddie can take me,” she said in the tone that booked no argument.

Eddie shrugged. “There’s plenty of room, I don’t see why not.”

She smiled, wrinkling her nose and Eddie gulped.

Eddie picked up the rest of the gremlins and dropped them off at the arcade. He turned to Nancy and said, “So what’s this really about?”

She smiled sweetly. “I’m going to teach how to make Steve’s favorite dishes and then you can decide candlelit dinner at your place or a picnic. I don’t really care which.”

Eddie blinked and then eyed her suspiciously. “Why are you helping me?”

Nancy sighed. “The one Valentine’s day Steve and I had together, I spent looking into Barb Holland’s death.” She looked down at her hands. “She was my best friend and I hated not knowing what happened to her. Steve was supportive. Because of course he was. But I threatened him that if he bought me so much as flowers or chocolates, I was going to shoot him.”

Eddie winced. “And then the last two Valentine’s days were just shit for the guy...”

She nodded. “I don’t think Steve’s had a good Valentine’s day since elementary.”

Eddie chewed his lip. “All right let’s do this. What all do we need?”

Nancy’s smile was sweeter as she patted his cheek.

Part 2 Part 3

Tag List: @zerokrox-blog @bidisastersworld @swimmingbirdrunningrock @madamonsieur-silvrene @artiststarme @samcoxramblings @maya-custodios-dionach @bejeweledbaby @spreckle  @a-little-unsteddie @krazyperson @princess-josephina @wonderland-girl143-blog @plutoshelm @newtstabber@bookbinderbitch @darkwitchoferie 

[wibble-wobbegong]

no im being taken over by the demon that is nancy wheeler. the way she treats other people’s problems is so blatantly derived from karen that it makes me insane

she so often fails to account for the issues people around her face when these issues aren’t putting them in immediate danger and we see this specifically with jonathan and mike. nancy was scared for mike in S1 because he was being hunted by the lab and he was in the pinnacle of danger, but as the seasons move on and mike is moved away from being the direct, most obvious victim nancy begins to redirect her attention.

if mike were to come to her directly about some of his issues, it’s a solid 50/50 as to whether or not she would see them as important enough to really address and we know that because of the way she never addressed her fault in the argument with jonathan in S3!! in her mind, her issues took priority because she doesn’t understand jonathan’s perspective and there isn’t a chance for her to delve into that because the giant flesh eating monster becomes another, higher priority

nancy faces a level of egocentricity but it’s not an intentional ignorance of other people’s problems or because she doesn’t care. she cares so much, and we see it with how she treats max even though she barely knows her because she wants max to be safe! she goes out and she protects jonathan from the demogorgon! nancy cares about people, she doesn’t want to watch anyone get hurt, but the household she was raised in didn’t foster a care that runs deeper than Keeping People Alive

like obviously she loves jonathan and she’s affectionate with him and has a whole speech about why she loves him. obviously (not really) she loves her brother. but, when it comes to needing to be the one to reach out, she doesn’t do it. she wasn’t raised to rely on others or let others rely on her for the small things. her idea of love comes from parents who barely care, and when they do it’s after break downs when she’s on the verge of tears or something.

jonathan and mike have also been raised to be independent people for different reasons, but they’ve also had people to connect with on a deeper level. the only person nancy really had like that died. when she tried to express her grief, she was shut down by steve and karen. karen only ever talked to her about issues she could personally relate to, and we see that reflected in nancy’s behavior

and of course it isn’t okay for her to treat people the way she does, but it’s not malicious or intentional. it’s a blindness she was raised to have and has yet to learn to overcome. in the same way el shouldn’t be smashing people’s faces in and mike shouldn’t have said what he said in the rain fight and will shouldn’t have shouldered the disconnect between him and mike entirely on mike’s shoulders, nancy shouldn’t only be valuing life threatening problems — but all of those actions have reasons. none of that is superficial or a flaw for the sake of flaws. it’s something to grow from and create a captivating arc with

n e way i actually love nancy and my hating in the past was very mike focused. her character is so interesting to me and i desperately want to put her under a microscope

[boldlyvoid]

Put On The Red Light | Part 2

18+ Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington

Summary: When Eddie's long-lost cousin, Roxy, shows up on his doorstep, he must accept that his whole life is changing once again.

Warnings: pov changes 3 times between eddie, roxy and steve | angst, parental death, cancer, narcissistic parents, anxiety, jealous Eddie, sexuality crisis, insecure Eddie, parental issues, implied/referenced parental abuse/neglect, background Wayne/Mr. Clarke, adoption, coming out, implied/referenced sexual abuse (more detailed next chapter)

word count: 10.6k

masterlist

Eddie wakes up around 8am… really, thats just when he stops tossing and turning and forces himself out of the bed. He gets ready as quietly as possible and sneaks out the front door without waking Wayne in the process. He pulls out of the trailer park at just a quarter after 8, heading right to the Wheeler's place for a nice chat with the smartest person he knows. 

Karen Wheeler opens the door with her hair still in rollers and her bright pink robe on, “Eddie… you’re here early?” 

“I know, I’m sorry, Mrs. Wheeler,” Eddie apologizes. “Would Nancy happen to be awake yet? I need her help with something.” 

Karen nods, “She just finished her breakfast, hold on,” she turns away from him and yells into the house, “Nancy!” 

“Yeah?” She peaks around the corner and sees Eddie at the door. “Hey, what’s wrong?” She asks because she knows him pretty well by now, he wouldn’t be at her door, dressed and aware of his surroundings at this time of day if something wasn’t wrong. 

“I uh, I need help with something at the library… at least, I think it’s at the library, I really don’t know what I’m doing… I just need your help, please?” he hates to admit it out loud. 

“Yeah, come in and I’ll just get changed and then we can go?” Nancy offers and Karen ushers him inside. 

“Thanks, really, it’s kind of hard to explain…” 

“I’ll be down in a sec, save it for the ride over,” she doesn’t want him to worry about her parents overhearing them and then she takes off, up the stairs. 

“Did you eat? I can make you something?” Karen immediately offers, not letting a single moment of silence pass. 

He shakes his head, “I’m good, thanks, Mrs. Wheeler.” 

“Oh, really it’s no problem on my end, I keep making the normal amount of food for breakfast but Mike isn’t ever here now that the Byers are back in town, so I always have extra,” she explains, making Eddie follow her into the kitchen. 

“In that case… Wayne has always called me a human garbage can, I always eat all the leftovers.” 

“See, you’re helping me out, not putting me out,” Karen can’t help but laugh. 

She takes a plate down from the cupboard and dumps the remaining scrambled eggs from the frying pan on it. She gives him the last 3 pieces of bacon and sets the plate down in front of him. “Do you want toast? Orange juice?” 

“This is more than enough, thank you,” he doesn’t want to impose anymore, he just takes the fork she gave him and digs in. 

He doesn’t mean to scarf it all down so fast, he just had no idea when Nancy would be back down and he’d hate to make her wait when this is his idea in the first place. He’s been thinking over the plan all night, he’s figured out how to let Wayne know how much he loves him and needs him and Nancy’s the only person he can ask for advice about legal documents. 

Nancy comes running back down the stairs just as he’s putting his fork down on the placemat, “hey, you ready?” 

“Yeah, yeah I’m good,” he covers his mouth to talk and finishes his last bite and then he stands. “Thank you so much, again, Mrs. Wheeler, really.” 

“You’re welcome, you guys have fun, let me know if you won’t be back for dinner,” she turns to Nancy at the end, “I love you.” 

“Love you, too,” Nancy gives her a smile and a wave, “see ya!” 

She doesn’t ask what’s up until they’re both in the van, “Please don’t tell me something bad is happening in the town again… I can’t do two in the same calendar year.” 

Eddie sighs, “No, no… it’s not a thing like that. Um, you know Matilda, the Roald Dahl book? She gets adopted by Miss Honey at the end and it doesn’t matter if it was a real adoption or not because Miss Honey loved her more than any blood relative could’ve? Like, Miss Honey was her family. Period. End of discussion?” 

Nancy nods along, “yeah?” 

“She still wanted to make it real. She still wanted Miss Honey to be her mom on paper even though she was her mom in her heart… and she got the adoption papers from the library… where would I get them?” 

“I think you get them at the courthouse?” Nancy offered, not pushing him with questions or trying to change his mind. She simply smiled and put on her seatbelt. 

“To the courthouse we go…” 

—

Wayne knocks on her door just a little after 11 am, she didn’t expect him to come all the way up to her apartment but he did. She opens the door with a big smile, “Hey, Dad, I was just about to come down and wait for you…” 

“I wanted to check the place out,” he says, peaking over her shoulder to get a good look… just like she did yesterday with Eddie. 

“Come in,” she extends her arm out and moves out of the way. “It’s not much but it’ll work for a while… uh, it was partially furnished, so I have a bed and a couch and some pots and pans and things… and I went to the grocery store yesterday morning before I went to the trailer,” She follows him around while she talks, watching him take a look at everything. 

“It’s a lot nicer than it used to be,” Wayne compliments, his lips pursed together as he nods. 

“You’ve been in here before?” 

“Yeah… Eddie’s mom rented this unit for a while, it was only a short walk to the hospital—

“Oh my god, it all makes sense now…”

“What does?” 

“He got snarky when you told him where I lived and then he didn’t drive me home last night. Steve did,” she explains. “And then when he dropped me off, Steve said if I ever needed a ride anywhere and you’re not available, I should call him and not Eddie… I thought maybe it was just him being a flirt like you said, but then it felt a lot more like Eddie was avoiding this place… and like Steve was protecting him.”

Wayne gives her a simple nod, “Yeah… his mom basically died in here.” 

“In here?” She points to the floor and her eyes widen in fear. 

“She technically took her last breath in the hospital but, yeah,” he doesn’t know how to really say it. “She faded away to nothing here, he was only 8 when she got sick, 12 when she died. It’s been hard on him.” 

She feels terrible, “I can’t imagine losing my mom when I was 12, it’s hard enough now…” 

“What do you mean?” 

“It’s just hard being away from her,” she shrugs it off. She doesn’t want to get into it all right now. She really can’t get into it now or she’ll ruin the whole day for herself with her tears. She still has some questions to ask and opinions to learn… She can’t lose him once he knows, too. 

“You’re growing up, it’s hard,” he at least tries to sympathize. “But you seem good here, you call me if anything breaks or they give you a hard time, okay?” 

“Okay, Dad,” she gives him the sweetest smile, she loves that she gets to call him that. That it’s real. He is her dad. “Uh, while I’ve got you here, I made something for you…” 

“Oh, why?” He’s a bit taken aback, he didn’t expect this. 

He follows her into the little kitchen and thats where he sees it. On the counter, she has a present waiting to be opened by him. She knew she wanted to give it to him today or tomorrow and this was the perfect chance. She gets him to sit at the table with her and she places the neatly wrapped gift in front of him. 

“Even though Father's Day is technically tomorrow, I wanted to give you this… and I needed to do it here and not in front of Eddie 'cause he’s having a hard time with all this.” 

“Is he?” Wayne instantly worries. 

“Yeah… I mean, now that I know his mom died I can see why. All he has left is you,” she finds it incredibly easy to sympathize. “It’s only natural to panic about sharing your only parent, just most people go through it when they’re toddlers.” 

“He wasn’t home this morning but I wanted to make sure he has dinner with us tonight, for this reason. I can’t have him thinking I like you more than him and vice versa. I love you equally,” he assures her. Staring her down with those Munson eyes she’s only seen in the mirror for 19 years. “You’re both my kids.”

Her eyes well with tears, “I love you, too… open it up.” 

“Okay,” he has to look away or he’ll cry too. He peels the brown wrapping paper gently, uncovering a scrapbook. “Oh, wow.” 

“When I was getting ready to leave, I went through all my photos and realized mom had two of everything… I really wanted you to see what I was like as a kid,” she explains, watching him flip from page to page, completely silent. 

He runs his finger over some of the pictures, taking in her features and watching her change over 18 years in just a few pages. He looks sad, realizing he missed out on so much of her life… and so much of it looks lonesome. She’s alone in most of her photos, her eyes have dark rings around them and she hasn’t smiled much past 8 years old. 

“What happened?” 

“What do you mean?” She leans over to see what photo he’s on, “Nothing happened there?” 

“I know this look, this is the look of a kid going through hell… Eddie looked the same when I took him in,” he taps the page and stares her down, “Did they hurt you?” 

She shakes her head, “Oh no, god, no! I just got bullied at school, I didn’t have good friends, it was normal at home… for the most part. They barely talked to me, they didn’t have the time to hurt me.” 

“That doesn’t make me feel better,” Wayne’s heart is clearly broken. “Not only did I miss out on your life, I couldn’t save you from the hard parts of it…” 

“No, but you saved Eddie and now Eddie is saving me,” Roxy shrugs, lips pressed together tightly, she didn’t know how much she wanted to tell him… it’s not really something a dad wants to hear.  

“How?” He doesn’t get it, he’s barely seen them interact. 

“I had this whole plan,” she says, taking a seat across from him at the table. “I’ve been saving my money for years thinking I’d look all through the entire state of Indiana for you… I was going to do everything to find my dad and then 3 months before I graduated, 3 months before I was going to run away to find you, my real last name is all over the news… if that didn’t happen to him, then I wouldn’t be here yet. I wouldn’t have you, yet,” Roxy explains, so sure of it. 

“That was the worst week of my life,” Wayne can't even begin to explain how awful it was. “I walked into my own home to find a dead girl I didn’t know and Eddie was no where to be found… and I couldn’t find him for a week. And when I did find him, he was in the hospital with stab wounds that looked more like something took a bite out of him. It was awful.” 

“I’m so sorry,” she reaches out for his hand across the table and takes it. “I can’t imagine what that’s like.” 

“If you’re the outcome, then it was well worth it… at least on my end, that pain paid off for me,” he gives her a small smile. “But I don’t expect Eddie to feel the same. ‘Cause nothings been the same since then. We lost most of his things in the earthquake, we’ve started fresh in the trailer and he’s barely ever home now that he knows Steve and Robin… and I get it, he went to hell and back with them, no wonder he finds it so easy to talk to them about it… I just wish he’d talk to me on his bad nights.” 

“Tell him that,” she can’t stress that enough. “I’m sure he knows but tell him anyway… Personally, I don’t think there’s any such thing as too much love.” 

“I love you,” he says directly to her for the first time, staring deep into her brown eyes… realizing how they’re a lot lighter than Eddie’s. Almost hazel. And then he gives her hand another squeeze. “I love you a lot.” 

“I love you, too,” she laughs as the tears stream down her cheeks, “Happy Father's Day.”  

He laughs then too, a single tear slips out and he wipes it off his face with his free hand, “Happy Father's Day to you too… say, you got a camera around here?” 

She nods, “I do, why, did you want to take a photo?” 

“We might as well put one in here together, and, if you want, maybe we can take one all together tonight?” He suggests, wanting to make sure Eddie felt included later too. 

“That sounds like a great idea.” 

—

When Eddie comes back home he stops dead in his tracks when he smells it… Wayne's famous brisket. 

“There he is!” Wayne cheers and walks over to him, “Whatcha got there?” He notices the yellow envelope in his hand just as he goes to hug him. 

“Oh, some job applications,” he lies, Wayne was on him about getting something to do during the days, so it’s believable for now. 

“Good, good,” he places his hands on Eddie's shoulders and brings him into a hug. “Please tell me you can stay for dinner?” 

Eddie nods, “Yeah, I can… I’m not going to see Steve tonight.” 

Wayne's brows furrow and he’s clearly shocked. “At all?”

He shakes his head, still holding Wayne tight. It’s been a while since they had a good hug. “Nah, I think I need a night with you… and Rox, too I guess?” 

Wayne pulls back first, “She’s here,” he points back to her and she gives him a smile and a wave, “She’s been helping me in the kitchen.” 

“He’s a great teacher,” Roxy adds. “I hear this Mac and cheese is your favourite?” 

“Oh, fuck yes!” He celebrates, this is the best thing to happen to him in a few days. “What’s the occasion?” 

“It’s my first Father's Day with both my kids,” Wayne announces, so, so proud of himself. 

Eddie loves to see the smile on his face, he can’t help but smile back, “So are we doing gifts tonight, or?” 

“I gave him mine already,” Roxy is honest, and from the look on her face she feels a little scared for his reaction. 

“So, I can give mine tonight like normal?” Eddie turns back to Wayne, “I’d really like to keep this as normal as possible.” 

“We want the same thing… I love you, kid,” Wayne reaches back out for him and rubs his shoulder. “I’m sorry I’ve been so busy these last few months, I don’t want you to think I’m replacing you.” 

“I know you’re not,” Eddie gives him a solemn smile. “But you know me, you know I’m weird with change. This was the cherry on top of the shit show that has been my life lately… I hate myself a little for reacting like a two-year-old with a new sister on the way, but I can’t help it. I’m not good with this shit.” 

“Not much is changing,” Wayne assures him.

“I want to continue this at dinner…” Eddie admits, “I had a whole speech planned out and a certain way I wanted to say all this, can I just go to my room for a bit?” 

“Sure, yeah,” Wayne gives in, knowing how Eddie reacts when things aren’t going according to his plan. He gets testy and anxious.

Eddie hurries off to his room and closes the door, taking the documents out of the manilla folder and grabbing his dnd book to use as a hard surface. He wanted to sign the papers before he presented them to Wayne… the adoption process is a lot simpler when it’s an adult being adopted, all they require is Eddie and Wayne’s signatures on the petition and then the court would finalize it, pending a short court appearance with lots of questions. They just wanted to make sure creeps weren’t adopting their girlfriends and greedy assholes didn’t steal money from vulnerable, yet rich, elderly people. 

Eddie and Wayne were definitely neither of those things. He knew it would be granted to him, he knew Wayne would be his dad in a matter of weeks… it was all going to be okay. 

Eddie got two copies of the adoption papers, too, because if this was his way of evening the playing field, Roxy deserved the chance to be Wayne’s kid on paper too. Thats only if she wasn’t already, he has a feeling that if she knew her dad’s name her whole life then it’s most likely on her birth certificate. It’s been real for her whole life. 

He has a moment to change and listen to a few songs so he can calm down, his mind is racing with the speech he wants to give and it keeps changing the more he thinks about it. He has so much he wants to say, so much he wants to thank Wayne for… he barely even knows where to start. 

He folds the pages up and puts them in his back pocket when he’s called out for dinner. Wayne’s famous brisket over Mac and cheese was his favourite meal in the world, he gets it maybe 3 times a year, and it was really special. And so, so delicious.  

Roxy talks up a storm about how cool Wayne's stories are, Eddie’s heard them all before but she’s right, they are cool. Wayne grew up in Florida, his mom comes from the large Jewish population there and his dad was from Louisiana meaning there were a lot of Cajun spices in this once-traditional Jewish brisket. 

Eddie takes his last bites and sets his fork down on the plate gently, he knows he has to start now, it’s just a little scary. “I um, I just wanted to say I’m sorry—

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Roxy cuts him off, thinking this is about her again. 

“No, I do… I got all pissy thinking you were stealing my dad from me when I’ve barely been home these last few months,” Eddie admits. “It’s been hard dealing with it all and— and you know what? Fuck it. I might as well be honest with both of you now that I know this is a permanent thing… basically, I got out of all that shit in March and all I wanted was to make Steve love me back, I never even thanked you for all the searching you did and the time you spent with me in the police station and in the hospital. I’ve never thanked you for anything, my whole life, actually.” 

“You don’t need to,” Wayne waves it off, he never did this for a thank you. He did it cause Eddie deserved a normal childhood. He did it because he's always loved him. 

“But I want to,” Eddie reaches into his back pocket and puts the pages down on the table. “You’ve been the best dad I could’ve ever asked for… but you’re not my dad and I think thats why I got so upset yesterday. You can call us both your kids, sure, but if you sign this then you can make it real, and Rox,” he hands her another copy of the papers, “there’s another copy here, I didn’t know if he’s on your birth certificate or not?” 

“He is,” Roxy says with a smile, she places her hand on her heart and swoons, “You really thought of me?” 

Eddie nods, “It’s only fair. That’s all I wanted. We’re both his kids, it should be official… if you want?” 

“I want. There’s nothing more that I want, son,” Wayne takes the pages and unfolds them, “You got a pen?” 

“Yeah, I do,” Eddie quickly reaches back into his pocket and pulls out a pen, he hands it to Wayne and watches him sign the few lines he was required to. “there… is that it?” 

“For now, we need to pick a day to bring it to the courthouse and have a judge sign off on it, apparently dudes try to adopt their girlfriends and shit so they have to do background checks,” Eddie still can’t believe the lady who gave him the papers said that. And that people really try and do that… it’s so weird.

“Ew,” Roxy vocalizes her disgust, “really?” 

He just nods, “Yeah… but I mean, our local judge is Lucas’s dad so, I think it’ll go through pretty easily and you’ll be my real dad in no time.” 

“And my brother,” Roxy gives him a glorious smile. “I always wanted a big brother.” 

“As your big brother I have some ground rules,” he says with confidence, even though on the inside he’s terrified. “I know you already said yes to that date with Steve, but he’s mine. I’ll share Wayne, I’ll share Friday night pizzas with my friends, I’ll share the fucking trailer if I have to… I just can’t share Steve.” 

“Oh, no you don’t have to worry at all…” She puts her hands up in surrender and she looks genuinely scared, she turns to Wayne and then back to Eddie and she realizes right then and there that this is it. This is the moment, she has to take it. “I’m… I’m a lesbian.” 

“Oh,” Eddie’s shoulders drop, his mouth hangs open while he stares at her. “oh…” 

“That’s wonderful,” Wayne reaches over for her hand and gives her a smile. “We’ll have to set you up with one of Eddie’s girlfriends, I think Robin—

“For sure, Robin,” Eddie can’t help but smile. “She had a feeling we were more alike than I thought.” 

“She’d be right,” Roxy laughs through her tears, overwhelmed with love and acceptance… this is how it should’ve gone with her mom. “Thank you, thank you,  really.” 

“Always, sweetheart,” Wayne looks at her with so much love in his heart. And then to Eddie, he reaches out his other hand to hold them both and he sits up a bit straighter for his own announcement. “I think it’s 'bout time you both know I’ve been seein’ someone, too… it’s serious, he’s coming over to meet you both around 8.” 

“Oh, that’s wonderful,” Roxy is overjoyed for him. “What’s his name?” 

“Scott Clarke,” Eddie answers with a knowing smile. 

“How’d you—

“Do you just like talking to Steve and Robin on Sundays before work…? Is that why you bring the tapes all the way up to the desk instead of the drop-off bin outside?” Eddie questions, smirking away, enjoying the shade of pink Wayne was turning. “They’re not dumb.” 

“Oh hush, you should be happy for me!” Wayne shoots back. 

“I am!” Eddie squeezes his hand a bit tighter, shaking it too. “How’d it happen?” 

“Yeah, tell us everything?” Roxy adds, the same big smile plastered to her own face. 

“He was takin’ names at the shelter after the quake, he knew I’d need a friend and he put his cot next to mine… we talked for 2 days before Dustin told me about Eddie, it was the worst week of my life but Scott made it a bit better,” Wayne shares, laying his whole heart on the line. “I know it must be weird for both of you, you know, I was with your mom and Eddie’s seen me date ladies over the years, but never a man… not that I didn’t see men, I just haven’t felt— I haven’t been brave enough to bring a man here, not until Eddie came out to me.” 

Roxy lays her other hand on top of his, holding him close, “There isn’t a time limit on coming out, you know? It’s actually really normal to not know as early as we do,” she references to herself and Eddie. “You get to be happy and yourself for the rest of your life now… I just hope he’s good to you.” 

“He’s wonderful,” Wayne swoons. “I can’t even begin to tell ya, you’ll just have to find out when you meet him.” 

“I can’t wait.” 

“Me either,” Eddie agrees, even though he knows Mr. Clarke. “You know he taught me that first year I lived here, in the trailer, right?” 

Wayne nods, “he said you were a little shit and I couldn’t agree more.” 

“Oh, I see,” Eddie playfully rolls his eyes. “But, no, really, he is a great guy, Rox. He’s one of the best teachers around, he actually asked me to keep an eye out for Dustin when he moved up to high school.” 

“He did?” Wayne didn’t know that. 

Eddie nods, “Yeah, last September, apparently Dustin and Mike were walking down to the middle school to have lunch with him every day and he so sent them my way instead.” 

“He has a huge heart,” Wayne can’t sing his praise any louder, even the look on his face screams love. He’s so gone for a science teacher of all people. It’s cute. Eddie’s really happy for him. 

“You guys serious?” Eddie can’t help but wonder cause Wayne looks like he’s in love.

Wayne nods, “I’m thinking I might start staying at his place on Saturday nights, so you’d have the trailer to yourself… with Steve.” 

“He has an empty house 7 days a week, if we wanted alone time we’d go there,” Eddie reminds him with a smirk. “I don’t think he swings this way, however.” 

“Ah…” Roxy grits her teeth and tilts her head, thinking differently. “I wouldn’t say that.” 

“You can like both, clearly,” Wayne references to himself, dropping both their hands and crossing his arms. “Seriously, how could he not like you?” 

“Thanks, dad… I’m really glad we can talk to each other like this,” he softens again. “It’s nice.” 

“I always want you to come talk to me, both of you,” he looks back and forth between them. “I love you.”

They both say it back to him at the same time, only Eddie says it a little bit faster, sticking his tongue out at Roxy right after. “I win.” 

“This time,” Roxy teases back. “You know, we should take that family photo you wanted,” Roxy reminds Wayne, standing from the table to find her purse. 

“Maybe we can get Scott to take it?” Wayne suggests, “It’ll look better that way.” 

—

They’re all laughing when there’s a knock at the door, making all their heads spin towards it. “He’s here,” Wayne gleams, standing up from the table to go and answer it. “Scotty.” 

“Hey,” Scott walks into the trailer and right into Wayne's arms, holding him tight with his face in Wayne's neck. He breathes him in quickly and then pulls back with a smile and then he notices the other two people in the room. “Oh, oh, hi…”

“Scotty, these are my kids… you know Eddie already but, this is Roxy.” 

“Hello,” Roxy comes right over and puts out her hand, “it’s so nice to meet you.” 

Scott shakes her hand gently, “You look so much like Wayne, it’s remarkable… he said you looked a lot like Eddie but I had no idea this much.” 

She smiles, turning back to Eddie, “We need to start telling people we’re twins.” 

“I’m 2 years older than you,” he snips back. 

“So, when you turn 21 we can use it to our advant—” 

“Okay, hush with that,” Wayne steps in, smiling the whole time, “you can be delinquents when he goes home.” 

“Sorry… hey, Mr. Clarke,” Eddie just gives him a little wave. 

“Scott is just fine, it’s been ages since I was your teacher,” Scott can’t help but laugh. 

“Hmm, I don’t know, you’re always gonna be Mr. Clarke the only good teacher I’ve ever had,” Eddie compliments him in his own way, “it’ll be nice to have you around more.” 

“And you’re both okay with this?” Scott looks so genuinely worried. He knows Wayne well enough already to know that his kids are his world, even if it’s only been a few days since he found out about Roxy. 

“Super okay with it,” Roxy assures, “I always wanted a dad and now I might get two…” 

“Wait, can we call you our stepdad, now?” 

“No.” Wayne shakes his head at the same time that Scott lights up with a very enthusiastic, “Yes!” 

“Really?” Wayne looks at him, full of shock and awe. 

He nods, “If you’re okay with it?” 

Wayne holds his hand a bit tighter. “Well, how would you like to take a photo of me and your stepkids?” 

They get him the camera, they gather on the couch, one kid on either side of Wayne and they all smile. It’s the same smile. Their eyes light up with little wrinkles around them, they have dimples on their left cheeks, and they’re 100% a family. No tests needed. 

—

“Is there like an ice cream place here at all?” Roxy asks, wanting to break away for a bit. “We should go hang out, just us.” 

“Uh, not really? But we can get something at the 7/11?” Eddie suggests, “Come on, I’ll drive… Wayne, you guys want anything from the store?” 

“I’m good, you good?” He asks Scott, arm around him while they sit on the couch. 

“I’m fine, thank you,” Scott just scoots in closer to Wayne and smiles, he’s overjoyed with being out and supported for the first time in his life. 

“We’ll be back,” Eddie announces, he holds the front door open and lets Roxy out first, following quickly behind her and towards his van. 

They hop in at the same time, slamming their doors in tandem. He shoves the key in the ignition and turns it, starting his noisy van with a rumble. They buckle up, he throws her in reverse and he whips them around with a smile, “Do you drive at all?” 

She shakes her head, “no, I didn’t really need to drive cause I had a bus system to get around in Chicago… I really liked the bus.” 

“We have 1 bus but it only takes people into Indianapolis and it’s 3 times a week,” Eddie shares, “did you have to go to Indy first before you got here?” 

“I did, it took a few hours and I could only bring 2 bags of my things, but, it’s what I had to do,” she explains with a sigh, looking out the window at her new town. 

“If you want to go back and get some stuff we can use my van,” he offers, “it’s only fair.”

“I can ask Steve to help, you don’t have to—

“Really?” He almost can't believe it. “Why?”

“It’s not like that, believe me, he just… he asked me to call him instead of you if it involves coming to my apartment and Wayne told me why,” she explains, knowing this is going to suck to talk about. “I’m sorry, Eddie.” 

“Oh,” he didn’t expect either of them to tell her. At least not so soon. “It’s okay, I should be over it by now…” 

“No, you don’t have to get over it! She was your mom,” Roxy pushes back. “I don't want you to come over if it’s going to bring everything back, we can hang out at the trailer or with your friends and Steve made it clear he will drive me home for you.” 

“Don’t lead him on,” Eddie blurts out. He can’t help but worry. 

“I don’t plan on it.” 

“It’s just… He thinks you’re pretty and he hasn’t gone on a date since everything happened in March, so that means he really liked you… I’m not saying call it off and ditch him, just… just don’t string him along and leave me with the tangled mess,” Eddie begs. “I love him too much to see him hurt.” 

“And he loves you the same,” Roxy points out. “He was adamant about keeping you from the apartment and I saw the eyes you gave each other at the party… and the way he looks at you like you hung the moon is admirable. I want something like that.” 

“You really think so?” 

“Absolutely,” Roxy gleams, making Eddie believe it too. “Wayne said you two are basically inseparable, he was genuinely surprised when you said you weren’t going to see him tonight.”

“I want to, believe me… it’s just-- I don’t want to talk to him about you right now, he’s really into you all cause you look like me,” Eddie explains, “you’re the safe option for him.” 

“Safe?” 

“Straight. Normal, appropriate,” he lists off some synonyms for her. “It’s everything I can’t give him.” 

It breaks her heart a little to hear but she understands it perfectly. She stares at him for a moment, wanting to do something to help but she doesn’t know what… “do you want me to talk to him about it?” 

“What?” He panics a bit.

“I don’t know, man, maybe I could relate to him? I know what this is like… it’s not easy growing up in a family that looks at you but doesn’t see you, they have this whole life imagined out for you and you never fulfil their dreams and then you have to accept that in order to be yourself and be happy you have to leave them. If he wants to be happy, if he wants you, he should be able to have that, even if never talking to your mom again hurts like a son-of-a-bitch.” 

He pulls into the 7/11 parking lot just then and parks, slowly he turns the van off and looks over at her with the gentlest eyes. She’s crying slightly, wishing she wasn’t but it hurts too much to pretend anymore. “I’m so sorry…” 

“It’s okay, I’m going to be okay here,” she wipes her tears and gives him a little smile. “But I can talk to him.” 

“Okay,” Eddie agrees, it’s a better idea than Will’s, and easier than Robin’s advice to just tell Steve himself. “I want to tell him I love him for the first time, myself, though, okay?” 

“Perfectly reasonable,” she swoons. “I’d do anything for you, Eddie… I think this new life is going to be good for me and I wouldn’t have it without you.” 

He takes his seatbelt off and reaches over for a hug, she does the same, meeting him halfway to squeeze him tightly. He digs his chin into her shoulder, closing his eyes and relaxing. 

Finally. 

—

She spends most of Sunday in bed, tired from the last few days. Moving was stressful, finding her dad was rewarding and sharing her feelings was way too vulnerable… she needed to recover. She wanted to spend the next 72 hours under her covers, alone, without any responsibilities… but that wasn’t possible. 

She had a date with Steve and his feelings tonight. 

Her plan was simple enough, they were going to have dinner and a chat and she was going to invite him back to share a bottle of vodka she stole from her grandma before she left… she was going to share her own feelings with him and in return, he’d tell her all of his own. 

And she wanted to ask about Robin… she’s so pretty and funny and kind… it wasn’t hard to daydream about a date with her instead. If things went right with Steve, he could put in a good word and maybe, just maybe, she’ll finally get to kiss another girl. She stared at Robin’s lips a little too much on Friday, she talked a mile-a-minute and her smile was beautiful, Roxy couldn’t help but stare. Couldn’t help but think about kissing her lips and holding her hands and telling her just how beautiful she is. She deserves to know someone’s falling for her, she deserves to be fawned over. She deserves the world. 

Instead of dwelling on what could be, she rolls herself out of bed and into the shower. It feels nice to take care of herself after such a rough week, she spends a little extra time in there just to relax before she has to do her hair and maybe some makeup… she doesn’t want to lead him on at all. She wanted to be his friend, badly. But nothing more. 

She gets ready quite quickly, cleans up her apartment in case he takes her up on her offer to come over and then she waits for him downstairs, in front of the building. 

“Hey!” Steve calls out, his windows all rolled down, he barely had the time to turn down his music. 

She hops into the passenger seat with a smile, “Hey, there.” 

“You look nice!” Steve compliments her, “You ready?” 

She nods, “Yeah, thanks. Let’s go, I’m starving.” 

Once she’s got her seatbelt on, Steve takes off down the road, music on low, he tosses a smile her way and then goes back to the road, “How are you?” 

“Good… tired, but good.” 

“Don’t tell me sleeping problems run in the Munson genes?” He teases. 

She laughs, “It does, but I slept okay. I’m just tired from moving and all the social stuff I’ve been doing.” 

“Yeah, I feel that, tomorrow is my last day off for the next week,” he shares.

“How late did you work last night?” She asks. 

“Closed at 10, was home around 10:45 after doing paperwork and dropping Robin off,” he explains. “I went over to the trailer but it looked like a full house, I didn’t want to intrude, so I just went home.” 

“Yeah, we did Father's Day dinner yesterday cause it was Wayne's only day off,” she pressed her lips together awkwardly, not saying that Eddie was avoiding him. 

“Oh shit, it's fathers day today…” 

“Forget to call your dad?” 

He shakes his head, “We don’t call each other unless we need to… like if I burned the house down or my mom was in the hospital.” 

“Oh,” she nods along. She was right. She could sense it in him, their lives were similar. 

Before she knows it, Steve is pulling up to a diner with a big blue and red neon sign illuminating the parking lot, making up for the lack of sunshine today. It was gloomy and gross out, something she was used to in Chicago and it followed her here. 

Steve opens her door for her, takes her hand to help her out and she smiles awkwardly as she thanks him. Wiping her hand off on her pant leg without meaning to, she keeps a bit of distance from him on the walk-in. He holds the door for her, lets her pick their booth and sits on the side facing the door so he can see everyone who walks in. He’s a protector type. No wonder Eddie was safe with him during whatever happened in March. 

They order pretty fast, both getting burgers and fries and a couple of cokes. The lady takes the order, she leaves them alone and they basically are. No one's in tonight, which is weird for Father's Day… but Steve says most families moved away after the earthquake, and those who stayed can’t really afford to eat out that often with repairs. 

They talk about the town, about his friends, the school he went to and she shares stories about living in the city. It’s nice. She can see why Eddie likes him so much. He’s easy to talk to, he’s kind, and even though she’s not into dudes, he is really pretty. 

She starts to pull apart at the piece of bun that fell off her burger and she eats it little by little as the conversation lulls to a halt. She feels awkward, he does too, so she says the first thing that comes to mind. 

Robin. 

“How long have you been friends with Robin?” 

“Oh, uh, I think a full year now,” he can’t believe it as he says it. “We started working together last summer at the mall… before it burned down.” 

“And you looked for another job together? That’s so cute,” she swoons. “Your friendship seems adorable.” 

“And you have nothing to worry about, she is strictly a friend. Platonic with a capital P as she would say,” he recalls with a fond smile. “She’s more of a sister to me than anything, I feel like we were separated at birth or something.” 

“No, that’s good, really good actually,” she makes a note of that. Hopefully, Robin didn’t have any romantic interest in him either. “My dad said you’re a huge flirt so I was wondering why you never flirted with her last night…” 

“I’m not a huge flirt?” He’s taken aback by that, “I’m just nice to the people I like…” 

“So you like my brother?” She teases him, she’s always picked up on the way Steve was with Eddie and vice versa. 

There was an obvious tension there. 

He stutters and turns a deep red, “what? no…” 

She leans in close and drops her voice so no one outside of their booth can hear her, “Is that why you asked me out? Cause I’m like a girl version of Eddie?” 

He buries his face in his hands and rests his elbows against the table with a groan, “how’d you figure me out so easily?” 

“Steve, this is perfect,” she reaches over and pats the top of his head as he looks up at her. She brushes his hair out of his face and smiles, keeping her voice low and just between them, she tells him the truth. “I was worried I wouldn’t find the queer scene in Hawkins, or if there even was one…? Do you know other gay people?” 

“I’m not…” he can’t even say the word, “but yeah, I do? Wait, are you saying you’re—” 

“Gay?” She confirms with a nod. “The gayest. I love women so much I almost passed out when I saw Robin for the first time.” 

“Oh, she’s going to love this,” he leans back against the booth and shakes his head with a building smile on his face and then he flicks his attention back to her. “Wait, so, you’re not mad I asked you out but don’t really have feelings for you?” 

She shakes her head, “you’re still paying, right?” She teases, not caring in the slightest. Having him as a friend was going to be nice.

“Of course,” it was a no-brainer to him. “Can I ask you something?” 

She nods, “anything?” 

“Robin always jokes about being the gay cousin in her family, so if you’re gay does that mean that Eddie won’t be?” He asks, legitimately believing the joke. 

“Steve, honey, that’s not a real statistic,” she wants to laugh at how absurd it was but he genuinely doesn’t know. “And why would it matter… you said you’re not gay?” 

He shrugs, “I’m not… I mean, I—I can’t talk about it here.” 

“That’s okay, but you should talk to someone about it… I’m done here if you want to go?” She offers, “I have a bottle of vodka at my apartment if you really want to get your feelings out?” 

“I would actually love that…” 

—

She sets the bottle and two shot glasses down on the table, “I only have Mountain Dew for a chaser… is that okay?” 

“Yeah,” Steve really didn’t care. “It’s been a bit since I’ve gotten drunk… we’ve had too much going on these last few months.” 

“I bet, I can’t believe how often your town was on the news lately,” she says from the kitchen. “Did you get hurt in the earthquake at all?” 

“I got hurt before… it’s a long story, I’m not even sure I can talk about it all. I can say it sucked, though,” he manages to give her a smile as she places the cans in front of him. “It was the worst week of my life. And I’ve been through some shit.” 

Steve pours them each a shot before she even sits down on the couch beside him. He can feel his heart beating 10 times as fast and his hands are clammy, but this is the best chance he has at getting all this shit out of him that’s haunted him for years. If he told Robin she’d give him a hug and she’d support him through it, obviously, and he’d love that but he doesn’t ever want her to look at him and know that she sees him differently… and Eddie. He can’t tell Eddie because if Eddie knew, he’d really kill someone and he’d really go away this time. 

Roxy is the best option. She’s safe, she’s kind, she’s gay… she has no idea who Steve Harrington is, he can’t ruin his reputation if it doesn’t exist here. 

He downs the shot and cracks open the mountain dew to chase it, coughing a bit, he makes a funny face, “God, that’s awful.” 

“I stole it before I left,” she admits, reaching for her own shot. “I doubt my grandma will even notice it’s missing too…” 

“Do they know you’re here?” 

She nods, “I think so… they don’t really care where I am as long as I’m not being a sinner under their roof.” 

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry,” Steve gets it right away. “Did you tell them or did they find out?” 

She downs her shot and coughs too, holding her chest with a grimace, “Ugh… I uh, I told them. I only wanted to tell them if I had something lined up after graduation, cause then it wouldn’t matter what they said… I could just leave. Eddie was my ticket out of there. I didn’t need a college to run to or a job to start, I saw him on the news and the reporter said he ran the dnd club and had a band and there were rumours he was queer and I knew if my mom didn’t support me that my dad might.” 

“I’m sorry,” Steve whispers, reaching out and laying his hand on her knee for a moment. He gives her a gentle pat and then reaches back to the bottle for another shot. 

She shrugs it off, pretending she’s fine. “It’s okay, I guess… I told Wayne last night and he was exactly as wonderful as I expected. So was Eddie…” 

“Obviously,” Steve says through the burn of the shot. “Even though Eddie’s never said the words out loud, to me, I know… and he knows I know. I assume he’s also told Wayne by now and even if he hasn’t, I remember Eddie told me one night that Wayne picked him up from a sleepover and he told him he was always going to love him no matter what… and that sleepover was the first time he thought about wanting to kiss another boy and it was like Wayne always knew… like maybe he saw himself in Eddie.”

“Yeah, I think that’s right… and you know about his boyfriend, right? It was Robins theory but—” 

“Oh, no, I know!” Steve lights right up at that, “It is Mr. Clarke isn’t it?

“He told me and Eddie last night at dinner, and we met him, he’s adorable with Wayne,” Roxy beams, “did Eddie tell you anything about last night?” 

Steve shakes his head, his face goes glum again, “No, it’s been radio silence since the party… he didn’t even come into the store these last 2 days.” 

“He was busy with Nancy yesterday, she helped him get two copies of adult adoption papers so that Wayne can be both of our dads, he didn’t know that my mom put Wayne on my birth certificate, so I didn’t need a copy, it was just nice that he thought of me,” Roxy looks genuinely happy. She found her place in the world and it’s working out for her. 

“So Wayne’s his dad now?” 

Roxy nods, “They both signed it so, I think so, yeah.” 

“Why didn’t he tell me?” 

“He thinks you’re not into him like that,” she’s brutally honest. “He also called dibs on you last night… I mean not in those words, but he did tell me I better not string you along and leave him with your tangled mess. It was kinda poetic…” 

Steve groans, “Oh god, he thinks I’m a mess?” 

“No, he just can’t deal with you pining over someone else when he loves you so much,” she lets it slip and her eyes go wide. She quickly covers her mouth then, “I wasn’t supposed to say that.” 

The alcohol must’ve hit them both at the same time, making her slip up… Steve feels it in his face and in his ears, everything is hot and his heartbeat is loud. It gets more intense as her words settle in. Eddie loves him. 

“He loves me?” Steve repeats. 

“Of course he does?” She leans right into it. “Wayne told me about Eddie’s history with this place, that’s why you offered to drive me home instead…” 

Steve nods, “he doesn’t need any added pain, he’s been through enough.” 

“How was he not supposed to fall in love with you?” Roxy can’t help but laugh, “you’d take a bullet for him, wouldn’t you?” 

“You have no idea… really… none at all.” 

“No, but he does,” she moves the focus right back to Eddie’s love for him. “From his little speech last night, I know his mom died and his dad abandoned him and for a long time it was only Wayne that he could depend on… he wants someone to make the conscious decision and pick him regardless of what’s going on. He wants someone who’s going to stay with him forever and that’s you, Stevie.” 

Steve doesn’t know what to say, he stares down at his hands and twiddles his thumbs, pulling at a hangnail real quick… he wants that too but it’s scary. Everything changes if he admits his feelings and they date. Every single aspect of his life changes. It’s so overwhelming he starts to cry, pinching the bridge of his nose, he turns away from her so she won’t see it. But she hears it. He lets out a choked sob, he covers his whole face in shame and loses it. 

“Steve,” she moves in closer and wraps her arm around him to rub his back, she shushes him in a soothing tone, “it’s okay, breathe, you’re okay.” 

“I want that…” he says through the tears. “I just… I can’t— I can’t love him quietly. You know?” 

She knows a bit too well. “I know.” 

“My dad’ll kill me,” he tries so hard not to sob, biting his lip so it won’t wobble. 

“Can I be honest?” 

He just nods, scared but he wants to hear it. 

“I met your parents on Friday night—

“No?” 

“Hopper and Joyce love you like family. Robin is your sister, Dustin loves you like a brother, those other kids look up to you and even your ex-girlfriend still loves having you in her life,” Roxy recounts, she saw the way everyone treated each other. She noticed how much of a family they are. 

Steve knows she’s right but it’s easier said than done. 

“I told them at my graduation dinner, right after the cake… they asked me when I was going to get a boyfriend and settle down if I wasn’t going to go to school and I said never, cause I’m a lesbian,” she stops to stare off at the wall, taking a few breaths with her tongue caught between her teeth. “They uh, they were quiet and then my mom lost it.” 

Steve doesn’t know what to say, he goes to say he’s sorry but she cuts him off. 

“It wasn’t ‘you’re going to hell’ or ‘you’re a sinner’ or anything I expected. She was mad because my grandma never let her boyfriends move in—not after what happened…”

“God, I’m sorry,” Steve can’t believe it.

“She said I can’t be gay cause I was always leading her boyfriends on and if I am then she wasted the last few years being single and not having dudes over just because of me… like it’s somehow my fault all the men she loved were fucking creeps?” Roxy can’t help but rant, it just falls out of her. “She was always a bitch, she never gave a single fuck about my feelings and it’s not like she was around that much so it shouldn’t hurt this bad but—

“No, I get it… my parents are nowhere near the best parents in Hawkins like they barely crack the top 1000, but the idea of them unloading all the shit I’ve heard them say about other gay people onto me is going to kill me, if he doesn’t,” Steve empathizes. “And I can’t get an apartment, I’ve only been working this last year and it’s not like I have a trust fund or life savings, if they find out I have to find a way to live on $6.50 an hour.” 

“You could move in here,” she offers, “we could split the rent?” 

“Then Eddie won’t come over,” he reminds her. “I’d be doing all this for him… none of the other dudes I’ve had crushes on were ever worth coming out for.” 

“You know, Wayne’s not going to let you go homeless either… everyone in your life will offer to take you in if your parents kick you out.” 

“The last thing I want is to feel like a burden on everyone,” he admits, reaching for the vodka again, he takes a swig right from the bottle this time. 

“Ew, gross,” she snatches the bottle back from him. “If you want to go crazy, I’ll get you a bigger glass.” 

She stands up and her eyes go wide as her balance gets thrown, “fuck, okay, I’m good.” 

“Do you get drunk often?” Steve asks, watching her walk back over to her tiny kitchen. 

“Uhhhh… I tend to drink alone,” she admits as she returns with two regular glass cups. She sets them down and pours at least 3 shots into Steve's glass, less in her own. “I’ve never been invited to a house party or had friends that wanted to come over…”

“In my experience, there’s never a guest list for house parties, you can just show up,” Steve knows from experience. “I don’t think I’ve ever gotten an explicit invitation…” 

“So you’re a partier and a flirt…”

“Some would say I’m a slut,” he picks up his glass and gives her a cheers. “Robin, specifically, used to call me a slut, actually.” 

“Used to?” 

He just nods, pouring his Mountain Dew into the vodka so it’s easier to down quickly. “I’m going through a dry spell.” 

“It’s only a dry spell if you’re trying to get dates,” she calls him out, guessing that he’s been too hung up on Eddie to really make a move on someone else. 

And she’d be right. 

“At first it was just cause I was busy taking care of everyone and everything… me and Eddie were in the hospital for a few days and Dustin sprained his ankle, that took a while to heal and you should see how he gets when he’s even slightly sick or sore, he’s a total baby,” Steve complains but he clearly loves it. “And then we went back to work and Robin started seeing Vickie and having her sleepovers so I kept going to see Eddie and it just became so routine, I mean, I have a toothbrush in his bathroom and his clothes are in my drawers…”

“How long have you known?” 

“That I love him or?” 

“I’ve known that I like girls since I was 5 and I discovered the bra section in the Macy’s Christmas catalogue,” Roxy can’t help but smile, it’s just the tiniest bit embarrassing. “It made my heart race and a part of me felt a little shameful but, they’re just so pretty and they looked so soft… and I’ve never felt that way about a boy. Sure, you’re cute, and Argyle was handsome and I can see why Nancy likes Johnathan… but Robin, oh my god?” She sighs, tipping her head back, and staring up at the ceiling. “She’s so pretty.” 

Steve just laughs, “Yeah, I thought I was in love with her for about 3 days last year… It turns out I have a hard time differentiating between romantic love and platonic love at first.” 

“But you know how you love Eddie?” 

“Pretty terrifyingly positive,” Steve admits, sipping on his drink, he holds it close to his chest like a hug and stares off at her wall. “I thought I just wanted to kiss him, at first, something about watching him talk made my heart feel like a magnet and I kept getting closer and closer and I wanted him to devour me with those lips… he kissed me in his sleep once. He rolled over and wrapped his arm around me, he kissed the back of my neck and snuggled in and— and thats when it all hit me.” 

“And you’ve never told anyone that before?” Roxy can’t believe it, not even Robin has heard this before and she can tell from the look on his face. 

“It’s nice having someone to talk to who doesn’t know anything about me. And it’s even nicer that you feel so much like home,” he smiles at her, his shoulders drop and all the tension in his system disappears. “You have no idea who I am, what I’ve done… he knows everything.”

“You need to talk to him,” Roxy says with a sigh, she can’t say anything more. Eddie wanted to be the first one to tell Steve he really loved him, Roxy couldn’t take that from him. “Do you want to use my phone? You need to talk to him.” 

“No, no, no,” Steve shakes his head, waving one of his hands. “No, I’m not saying it on the phone, I have to go see him.” 

“You can’t drive?!” she reminds him, her voice getting a bit louder than she expected. “Seriously, Steve.” 

“So, I’ll walk,” he goes to stand but he’s a bit wobbly. He’s had a quarter of the bottle and all he ate today was dinner. 

“No,” she reaches out for his hand. “I’ll call him, he’ll come get you. He’s not afraid to come here, especially not if it’s for you.” 

“Fine,” Steve slams himself back down onto the couch, “but we’re waiting outside for him…” 

“Okay,” Roxy agrees, heading over to the phone on the wall. She hasn’t had to make a call yet, she really hoped it worked. 

Wayne’s number is on a piece of paper taped to the wall, she put it there for when she’d eventually need it and thank god… she was a little too tipsy to dig through all her shit looking for it now. She dials the number quickly, she holds the receiver to her ear and she waits… and waits… but nothing. 

“I don’t think he’s home?” 

“Ah, fuck,” Steve’s head slumps forward with a sigh, he waits just a second and then tugs himself back up to his feet. “555-2744, thats Robins, he goes to her when I’m busy.” 

He watches Roxy dial the new number and wait again, only this time she gets an answer. “Hey, Robin? It’s Roxy. Yeah, hi…” she gets all smiley, “I’m good, how are you?” 

“Hey,” Steve shoves her. “Ask about Eddie.” 

“Is Eddie with you?— He is? Can he come pick up Steve? We got drunk and he wants to go home,” Roxy explains, nodding along and then she hangs up. “They’re on their way.” 

—

They’re sitting outside on the bench when Eddie pulls up in his van, he throws 'er in park and jumps out just as quickly as Robin. “Is he okay?” She asks first, also reaching Steve first. 

“I’m fine,” he pushes Robin's hand off his arm, drunker now since he chugged the rest of his drink. “I wanna go home…” 

“I’ll take you home,” Eddie smiles softly, not expecting Steve to stand and throw himself at him. But he does. Eddie catches him with an “Oof, okay, big fella.” 

“Just you,” he whispers. “Only wanna go home with you.” 

Eddie just holds him, “okay… Robs, can you stay here with Roxy and make sure she doesn’t get drunker without anyone around?” 

Robin nods, turning to Roxy, “What got into you two? This was a date, was it not?” 

“Nooo!” Both Roxy and Steve turn to her to assure her, hands raised and both mildly disgusted. 

“Okay, damn,” she looks back at Steve, unable to read him when he’s drunk, “you be good for Eddie, don’t start running on him like you do with me.” 

“That was one time,” Steve points, squinting, he can barely hold himself up, luckily Eddie is there. “I’m fine… I just wanted my Eddie.” 

“Well, you got me,” Eddie can’t help but smile. “Come on, let’s get you in the van… goodnight ladies, call me in the morning?” 

“I will,” Robin smiles back. “Take care of him, he’s one of a kind.” 

“You think I don’t know that?” 

“Shh,” Steve covers his mouth, “don’t talk about me like I’m not here.” 

Eddie laughs, turning him towards the van and helping him into the passenger seat. He helps him with his seatbelt and takes a leap of faith… he kisses Steve on the forehead quickly, “Stay put, I’m just running around to the driver's side, okay?” 

Steve grabs his arm and holds him there, staring into his eyes, pouting slightly. “Don’t be long? I always miss you…” 

“I won’t,” Eddie assures him, pulling away and shutting the door. He turns back to the girls, who are watching intently. “See ya.” 

“Bye,” they wave in tandem. 

He rushes around to his side and hops in quickly, “see, I’m speedy.” 

“Mhm,” Steve closes his eyes and leans back against the headrest, slightly turning towards Eddie. 

He starts the van and pulls out into the street carefully, heading back towards Steve's place… it was always weird to think they lived so close, the trailer park and Kerley were only separated by a farmer's field. It would take 10 minutes to walk. They shared the same bus all through school for crying out loud. 

The drive is quiet, Eddie almost thinks Steve is asleep until he speaks. “You missed the turn?”

“I’m going to your house?” 

“No, I wanted to go home,” Steve whines. 

Eddie’s heart swells as he takes a deep breath, realizing that Steve means the trailer. 

His house isn’t his home. 

Eddie is. 

[brionysea]

soooo vale of shadows on mike's playlist

Type 6 and insane

this line made me wonder if they were talking about the enneagram personality types and if that one specifically applied to mike, so i looked it up and...

yes. i'm gonna take that as an immediate yes

like. these could literally be from the personality section of a mike wheeler wiki page

i'm lowkey convinced that the duffers must have looked at enneagram types when making these characters just like i do

and then there's this bit...

which, if the manifestation theory is true (which the rest of the song heavily supports but that's a different post), explains everything

They are often filled with a nameless anxiety and then try to find or create reasons why.

do you ever notice how much better mike is in situations where he has something to fight against? he's not drifting. he's solid. he has purpose, he has the necessary intelligence and strategic capabilities and leadership skills, he has constant opportunities to prove his own bravery and importance to the people whose opinions he values (and therefore himself)

in normal life, he flounders. he can't convince his parents to let them play their game for 20 more minutes. he doesn't have anything productive to channel his grief into. he avoids his friends. he caves in on himself

that's just an interesting contrast, isn't it?

the annual tragedy coming to hawkins every year also serves to make him feel more like the person he wants to be - a brave knight, fearlessly fighting against the forces of evil - and he can carry that reassurance with him back to the mundane, suburban life that never makes him feel anything but trapped and worthless

but it never sticks, because his insecurities keep getting ripped right back open again, so the monsters keep coming back

this exchange from "the source" (👀) is also particularly interesting in this new context

Mike: They're conspiring against me.

Will: That's what you're concerned about right now?

Mike: It's not my main concern. It's just a sub-concern.

the implication is that mike's being ridiculous for worrying about the made-up idea of max "corrupting" el, but wouldn't it be fucked up if the main problem that he's supposed to be worrying about was made up too? if he's been the titular source the whole time?

idk, i think about the character consequences of a reveal like this all the time. and how obvious it would be in hindsight

but back to enneagrams:

once they establish a trustworthy belief, they do not easily question it, nor do they want others to do so

and this just. makes me a little bit crazy. intelligent late-comer characters like robin and erica aren't allowed to work with mike when he's making those bizarre leaps in logic that match up perfectly with how the UD works and what its weaknesses are, because their tendency to ask smart person questions -> "hey, how the fuck does he know that?" -> the whole game falls apart (and crushes mike with guilt in the process)

seriously, imagine a research scene like the one robin had in the library with nancy, but with mike instead. there wouldn't be an "i don't know" response to what they're looking for, there would be a dead-on response that turns out to correlate exactly with the magic answer they find half an hour later - if they even need to do research in the first place, because mike tends to just make shit up on the spot that's immediately accepted as the show's lore. robin would find that so weird and she would not keep it to herself, especially if it's backed up by a million other instances of mike knowing things he shouldn't like he does every season

the lack of familiarity with mike and how he operates is exactly what would lead to those weird patterns being questioned, because there's no instinctive "well, that's just mike" response to fall back on like there is with the core cast

this paragraph pretty much single-handedly convinced me that the show will end when mike's internal world comes into balance (that or when he dies, which i do and don't like thinking about in equal measure)

think about it: if this whole thing has just been one teenager's insecurities unknowingly being brought to life so that he can beat them back with a stick, when will it stop? when will it end? when he gains the type of self confidence that naturally comes with growing up and growing into himself, or when they die with him

mike might be okay with his death in those circumstances, because he thinks everyone else will be better off without him on an objective level of "the horrors will leave my friends alone forever", but characters like dustin and will and lucas wouldn't let that happen in a million years, no matter what their reactions to mike creating the horrors otherwise are

this makes me even more convinced that the season 4 threat - the one that's the perfect opportunity to tell the internal voices that don't think you have what it takes to make it in the real world to go to hell, if you have the kind of danger-induced determination and self-belief that he does - came from, and was meant for, mike

it would be interesting to determine what level he's at each season, with 1 being the healthiest and 9 being the unhealthiest, but i can't wrap my head around it. if anyone else wants to, please go ahead!

[strangeswift]

Merry Christmas, @belovdly !! I'm your secret santa!

For your gift, I've written a little Christmas themed ficlet of the party featuring established byler, set post season five. Hope you enjoy!

(Thank you @elekinetic for beta-ing!!)

@bylersecretsanta

-

If you'd asked Mike Wheeler an hour ago to tell you the most difficult thing he's ever done, he probably would have said fighting off a hoard of demo-bats, or escaping the mind prison of a psionic lunatic.

And yes, those things were exceptionally difficult, but if you asked Mike Wheeler in this very moment the most difficult thing he’s ever done in his life, he would unequivocally tell you, building this goddamn gingerbread house.

 He probably would’ve given up on the goddamn gingerbread house almost immediately, if it weren’t for the fact that he was caught up in a gingerbread house building competition. 

It was El's idea to build gingerbread houses, and Dustin's idea to make it a competition. El and Dustin were a team, as were Lucas and Max, and Mike and Will.

Mike wanted to win this stupid competition, particularly so that he could rub it in Max’s face when she and Lucas lost.

The problem was, building the gingerbread house proved to be pretty difficult. One side of the roof kept sliding off, no matter how much icing they added. 

Mike didn’t understand how Dustin and El got theirs built so easily. Lucas and Max had the decency to struggle a little bit, but even they eventually managed to get their house put together. Mike and Will were terribly behind. 

Granted, Mike spent quite a bit of their allotted time tossing gumdrops in the air and trying to catch them in his mouth in an attempt to impress Will. (He didn't catch any, so it didn't seem to impress Will, but did make him laugh, so it was totally worth it.) Still, the stupid gingerbread roof wasn't helping matters. 

Mike was holding up the stubborn piece of gingerbread, waiting for the icing to dry on their fourth attempt at attaching the roof. He slowly lifted his hand, and the roof finally stayed put.

Mike grinned and nudged Will. “Fourth time’s a charm.”

“Very impressive,” Will said sarcastically.

Mike looked back at the gingerbread house just in time to see the roof slide off. Again.

Mike and Will groaned in unison.

“I don’t understand why it’s not sticking,” Mike said, frustrated.

Dustin picked up the tube of icing next to Mike. “Probably because you’re using icing that expired in 1970,” he said.

“What?” Mike snatched the icing from Dustin, and read the label – which did indeed have an expiration date of December 1970.

“Did you know it was expired this whole time?” Mike asked.

Dustin shrugged. “Yeah, I was surprised the rest of your house stayed up so well. I don’t know why you were using that stuff.”

“It’s the icing you handed us!” Mike said.

Dustin smirked. “I found it at the bottom of the cabinet, but it was Max’s idea to give it to you,” he admitted.

“Dude!” Max said and shot Dustin a look.

“You’re actually the worst,” Mike said to Max, “El do you hear that? Max sabotaged your competition.”

El looked up from the gingerbread house which she was focused on carefully decorating. “That is not sabotage, that is called a prank.”

“Thank you, El,” Max said smugly.

Mike sputtered, “How is that not sabotage? El, do you know what that word means?”

“Wow, dude. That’s super condescending,” Lucas said.

“No, I’m genuinely asking! Sometimes she doesn’t know words!” Mike said.

“Wow, Mike,” Dustin said, shaking his head.

El was giggling uncontrollably.

“I think we’re glossing over the fact that Max and Dustin sabotaged Will and I’s gingerbread house. Which is unbelievable,” Mike said.

“Mike,” Will interrupted with a laugh, “it’s okay. Let’s just try again with some not expired icing.”

Mike met Will’s eyes, and he couldn’t be annoyed anymore, watching the way Will's eyes crinkled at the corners when he laughed. 

“Okay,” he said, smiling at Will, who smiled back.

Max scoffed, and Mike narrowed his eyes at her. “What?” he demanded.

“Oh, nothing. It’s just funny how you’re an absolute nightmare to everyone except for Will,” Max said.

“Okay, that is so not true,” Mike said, and looked to Will for backup.

Will shrugged, “Kinda, but it’s cute.” 

Mike felt his face warm. “See, I’m cute,” he informed Max, who rolled her eyes.

“You’re certainly something,” Max said.

El looked up from placing gumdrops on the roof of her gingerbread house. “It is cute,” she commented.

“Uh, thanks El,” Mike said.

She smiled at him before promptly turning her attention back to the gingerbread house.

"Okay, yeah, Mike's adorable, glad we established that," Lucas said, "Now can you please help me decorate? I’ve been doing this whole thing by myself while you sat there laughing at Mike,” he said to Max.

“Sorry for having priorities,” Max said, but she picked up a handful of m&m’s to help Lucas make the windows.

Will nudged Mike with his shoulder. "Hey, let’s try again."

Mike nodded. He started to pick up the piece of gingerbread, but Will also went to grab it, and their hands brushed together.

"Sorry," Will mumbled with a smile.

"S’okay," Mike said. His skin felt warm where it brushed Will's hand, and he couldn't resist lacing their fingers together. Will squeezed his hand, and he smiled as he reached for the good icing with his free hand.

“Gross. You guys are so gross,” Dustin complained, pointing at their joined hands.

“You’re just jealous Suzie-Poo isn’t here,” Mike said as he applied icing to the borders of the gingerbread.

“Maybe, but you’re still gross,” Dustin said.

“I think it is sweet,” El said.

“So sweet,” Max said with a grin.

“Shut up Max," Mike said, "as if you and Lucas weren’t all over each other during movie night last week."

“We were not all over each other,” Lucas said.

“I think they just held hands,” Will recalled.

“Thank you, Will,” Max said.

“We’re just holding hands!” Mike protested, but as he said it he dropped Will's hand to place the gingerbread roof on for —hopefully— the last time.

“Yeah,” Max said, then took the lollipop she was sucking on out of her mouth and pointed it at them, “but it’s gross when you guys do it." 

“Ouch, Max,” Will said, “Just because we’re two guys holding hands–”

“Oh, stop it,” Max said, and threw a handful of m&m’s at Will’s chest.

Will laughed and tried to dodge the m&ms. “Jeez, there’s no need for violence,” he said.

Mike was holding the roof of the gingerbread house on, but he used his free hand to pick up a gumdrop and pelt it at Max’s forehead. It bounced off and landed on the table, and Max scowled at him and rubbed her forehead.

“Oh calm down, you guys know we love you. And your gay love,” Dustin said to Mike and Will.

“Dude,” Lucas said, “their gay love?”

“I hate all of you,” Mike said, “All of you except for El and Will, I hate.”

El smiled, “I love you too!”

“I didn’t say– Okay sure, love you,” Mike said.

“Awww,” Will said with a smile and leaned into Mike.

“Oh my god, you’re on thin ice too,” Mike told him.

Will smiled and kissed him on the cheek. Dustin and Max pretended to wretch. Mike couldn't even pretend to be annoyed, because he was too busy trying to get his blushing under control before he was brutally teased.

He and Will were going on almost a year of dating, and yet, Will still managed to make him blush. Constantly. 

“Lift your hand, see if the roof held,” Will said– with a smirk that meant he most definitely knew what he was doing to Mike. 

Mike lifted his hand, and finally, miraculously, it held. The entire table erupted into cheers.

“Yeah, yeah. Screw you guys,” Mike said, but he was smiling.

"Come on," Will said, gesturing to their gingerbread house, "we have a lot of catching up to do."

“Just a second,” Mike said, and picked up a gumdrop off the table.

"Mike, seriously stop wasting gumdrops!" Dustin said, but Mike was already tossing it in the air and tilting his head back.

He definitely threw it too high, the green gumdrop almost hitting the ceiling. As it fell back down, Mike braced himself to get hit in the eyeball or something. 

Except, it didn't land in his eye. It landed directly in his mouth. His eyes shot open in surprise as he looked at Will.

El whooped and Dustin said, "Wow, alright, that was impressive, I'll give you that."

Will's lip quirked up at the corners and he rolled his eyes, "Good job," he said.

Mike grinned and grabbed Will's face, then pressed a kiss to his lips, gumdrop still in his mouth. Will made a surprised sound, and there was a chorus of groans as they were pelted with candy, but Mike didn’t care.

He pulled away, and Will pushed his shoulder gently. 

"I mean it, we have to get to work. And uh, you have a lollipop in your hair."

Mike scrambled to pull the lollipop out of his hair, but it was stuck.

"Max! What the hell!'

[qprstobin]

Mike is just a little guy! And even if he knew that Will has a crush on him, like… he isn’t that much of an asshole, I think? He is very awkward and has fucked up ideas of masculinity, yeah, but I don’t know! Even if the crush is mutual he shouldn’t, like, be in tune with every emotion that Will has. Sometimes people act like Mike should be aware of every little thing that Will feels and just immediately react accordingly, like some sort of a wizard. But Mike paying less attention to Will than when Will was missing/dying is just a result of Mike healing from that trauma! Let Mike be aloof! The Wheelers are Like That TM, it’s fine.

Mike is far less of an asshole than people portray him as. They see him having an attitude with people and the weird shit that happened in s3 with El and Max (which was I think at least half bad writing by the Duffers and half just teenagers being teenagers and having growing pains).

Mike is an extremely empathetic character in the show. Some people make fun of the "Mike is the heart" thing but lmao, he is?? He's not always very good at apologizing, but he is far more consistently than some of the others shown to be compassionate and in tune with the fact they are struggling. Mike is the one who notices first of the Party that Will is not okay in s2. As soon as they are together again in person Mike can tell that not everything is as fine with El as he thought. Just because he made some shitty comments in s3 when everyone's base misogyny level was raised for some reason and struggled saying "I love you" (which... he's like 14/15 of course he does??) doesn't mean he's not empathetic or compassionate.

To your point about the crush like, idk if the feelings are mutual (I am... not a b*ler shipper personally) but like you said if they are? That doesn't automatically mean he can read Will's mind? There has to be give and take and communication in a relationship. And yeah, their communication wasn't great in s4 but sometimes that happens when friends move! He's not a bad person for either a) not returning Will's feelings (and not realizing that Will has those feelings in the first place) or b) struggling with his own emotions and feelings? He's a kid, being a kid is fucking hard without the constant near death experiences. He isn't a bad person if he doesn't understand his feelings, doesn't know what those feelings are, and/or struggles to accept those feelings.

Like Mike realized that he had fucked up with that argument in s3! I think he realized it immediately, but didn't get a chance to apologize because of the Mind Flayer stuff.

Both Wheelers have issues with their emotions it's true! They also sometimes have issues with tunnel vision, though Mike's tends to be tunnel vision focused on one specific person rather than ambition/problem solving like Nancy's is. They obviously don't come from a great home environment emotionally (though I don't think it's as bad as some people hc but like, his dad is an asshole and emotionally unavailable, and Karen can be great but also has her own shit going on as well as Holly) and they suffer for it! But he's also only a teenager. *shrugs*

[serendipitouswasteland]

Mike's Unsaid "I Love You"s

Note: This was transcribed from my AO3.

ship: byler pov: third person written: July 12, 2022 first published: July 12, 2022 word count: 2,493 - summary: "Will, you know that's not true! Of course I care about you!"

"Really? Then Where's my letter?"

Will, Lucas, Dustin, El, Erica and Mike are sitting at the far end of the dining table in the Wheeler house, Mike's parents and sisters as well as other friends and family of the boys scattered around, too. Despite everything going on right now, they still had to eat, and everyone was glad that Karen was such a good cook (with the exception of Ted, whom, despite having been told the truth, still doesn't believe any of what they're saying). Will picks at the food on his plate, glancing around at everyone that's there.

You have Steve, Robin, Jonathan, Nancy, and Argyle in the doorway to the foyer, most likely talking about next steps. Looking past them you could find Ted sitting in his recliner just like always, Holly sitting in his lap. In the kitchen was Karen, Joyce, Hopper, Murray and the rest of the parents all looking visibly concerned, and by the expressions on each of their faces and the constant glances and weak smiles toward the kids, it was obvious they were worried with how to keep all of them safe.

Will sighs before looking up at his friends. None of them had said much at all since sitting down to eat. Two years this had been happening, and things had changed between all of them. Lucas lost his first love, Dustin lost one of the people he looked up to most, El had lost for the first time ever (but she wasn't going to give up just yet), and Mike?

Well, Mike hadn't done much to result in any changes to him, but Will has known Mike for twelve years now, so when he started being colder to everyone and more closed off than normal, Will was shocked to say the least. The problem was that Mike was the most closed off with him, so there wasn't anything that Will could do about it. If his best friend who always opened up to him wasn't going to let him in, what was there to do? Get down on his hands and knees and beg him to tell him what was going wrong? Will may love him, but he wouldn't do something that wasn't warranted and that would only cause him to be embarrassed.

Then, yes, there was the fact of Will being in love with Mike. With it being the year of 1988, Will has officially loved Mike for half a decade. Five whole years. At this point, there was no way that Will would stop loving him any time soon. Even if Mike died tomorrow, Will would still be in love with him for years to come because it's Mike.

"What do you think, Will?" El asks, but it's immediately made clear to everyone that Will has no idea what's going on.

"Hm?" Will hums, wanting to be clued in on the conversation.

That is until his eyes meet Mike's. Usually Mike would be the one to tell him what he missed, rant to him about how wrong someone was about a certain thing they said, eventually leading them down this he said/she said rabbit hole that there was no way of getting out of, but that doesn't happen. Mike gives himself less than a second to continue looking at Will before he's looking down at his plate. Part of it angers Will, but it mostly just makes him sad. Why was Mike being such an asshole to him?

"Are you okay? You've been spacing out a lot lately," Lucas asks.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Will lies, and everyone quickly believes him– everyone but Mike.

"Bullshit," Mike mumbles, trying to be quiet but when it comes to making sure Will is okay that's never really been possible for him (except for when they were alone and it was just the two of them, or he was able to get close enough to Will to whisper in the quietest, softest voice that Will had ever heard).

"You don't get to call bullshit on what I say anymore."

"Too late. I just did."

"And yet you couldn't have been bothered to care to ask how I was feeling."

Mike drops his fork, and Will watches as his jaw shifts, his tongue poking at both of his cheeks from the inside. He's trying not to say something, but it doesn't last long.

"It's not my fucking job to check up on you 24/7," Mike says, pushing back his chair and standing up from the table, one foot out the room when Will stands up, too.

"Then what the hell have you been doing your whole life? Pretending to not be a self-centered asshole? Are you really that vain and selfish?"

"I'm not selfish!"

"Because that totally explains why you only ever open up to someone when it's convenient for you."

"What the hell are you even talking about?"

"I mean when El was with Brenner again and you used me in an emotionally vulnerable state to get me back on your side, but you didn't need that for me to be ready to go find her because in case you didn't notice, Mike, she's my sister. Then there was when you and El broke up and you begged her to say because you claimed to need her, but you were doing completely fine without her, weren't you? After all, she's not the reason Hawkins felt different, I was. Or was that just another lie? Part of me kind of hopes it was because that would just be gold. Pure fucking gold for Mr. Friends Don't Lie to turn out to be the biggest liar around!"

"Here you are yelling at me and yet you're trying to call me the selfish asshole? El and I breaking up has nothing to do with you, and then you use it for your own personal gain in an argument about selfishness? How about how..."

Mike continues yelling, following Will as he makes his way upstairs, trying to get away from everyone and all of the noise. Will walks into Mike's room, covering his ears, but that doesn't keep him from being able to hear Mike's muffled yells and the bedroom door slamming shut behind him. Will's head is swimming, pounding, a headache quickly pinching at all of the nerves in his brain as Mike continues to be furious with him, and Will had no idea why, because to him what he'd said was true. That didn't change the fact that Mike clearly had very differing views. In all truthfulness, Will almost forgot what they were fighting about. All Will knows at this point is that he can't take Mike's yelling anymore, so he snaps— he really snaps.

"You know I find it real funny how you haven't cared at all about anything I've had to say for years, and yet all of a sudden I say one thing that was meant as a joke and it's the biggest thing in the world. Do you even realize how fucking stupid that sounds? You have made it so glaringly clear that you don't give a shit about anyone but yourself, which what once would've been totally unlike you now but now seems like your only personality trait. I mean, you are such a douchebag, Mike! I can't believe I once thought that you actually cared about me!"

"Will, you know that's not true! Of course I care about you!"

"Really? Then where's my letter? Or do I have to remind you that you only called me three times out of an entire year?"

Mike's raises his eyebrows, clenching his jaw as he walks over to his bedside table while starting to yell again. Will falls to the ground, placing his hands on the back of his head, trying to keep himself from punching something. He's about to get up and leave when Mike throws a pile of papers at Will's feet, his anger still not having left yet. Will looks up at Mike with a hateful, questioning glare before picking up one of the papers. A letter, Will quickly notes as he starts to read.

"There. My heart laid bare on every single one of those stupid letters that, for some reason, I couldn't ever bring myself to send, but it's not because I don't care about you, Will. Of course I care about you! It's all that I have ever done! I don't know a single moment of my life where I haven't cared about you. You are quite literally the first thing I think about every morning I wake up and every time that I fall asleep. You somehow even find a way to sneak into my dreams, not to mention my love letters to my girlfriend that I didn't even realize were love letters to you until I had finished writing them, and I knew that I couldn't send them because then 'What would Will think?' and I know that it's stupid because you out of all people would understand, but it's not that easy, Will.

"And I'm sorry, okay? I am so, so sorry for never sending you any letters but it's a lot more than me suddenly not caring anymore because believe me Will, I care. I care so damn much that I'm pretty sure that, at this point, it's too much, because I don't think I can take it anymore!"

Will is staring at the bottom of the first letter he had picked up, his pointer finger resting on the words signed at the bottom. He quickly glances away as he shifts through the rest of the letters with his free hand, them all saying the same thing at the end, and there's dozens of them. It's like someone dumped the entire gift card aisle at the store into his lap, and Will had to look at every single one.

"And now you're not even paying attention to me. Great. Just great..." Will can hear Mike mumble, his anger having slowed and now feeling simple frustration as he turns around and rests his hands on his dresser.

"Mike," Will says with a gulp at the end, unsure if what he's reading has the implications that he thinks. "You signed all of these 'Love, Mike.'"

"I know," Mike make breathes, not turning around, his head hung low.

Will looks up from the letters finally, keeping one held in his hand as he stands up and moves to be standing behind Mike. He holds the paper out where both of them can see, one of his arms snaking around Mike's waist without either of them realizing it as Will tries to convey the thoughts that he's having, but it's hard when he's just yelled all of those words at the top of his lungs.

"You wrote that you love me," Will says, letting the letter fall onto the top of the dresser.

"Like I said, my heart laid bare."

"Why didn't you ever say anything? You had two whole years, Mike, and not a word about any of this."

"I was scared, okay? I didn't want you thinking anything bad about me or that there was something wrong with me because even I still feel like there is."

"Mike, nothing in this world could make me think that about you. You're my best friend and...and I have been in love with you for five years now, which is crazy to me because we were just kids and I thought that it was because we hung out all of the time so that's why I felt those things, but...but then I moved and just, god, the mere thought of you was able to make me blush like crazy. I felt like a madman while I was in California waiting for a call or a letter from you or something, but it never came, and I was still somehow so in love with you and– and I still am. God, Mike, how could you not see it? How could you not know that I'm in love with you?"

Silence falls over them, Mike finally turning and looking at Will, their eyes meeting for only the second time tonight. Will stares at the brown surrounding Mike's iris, taking it in. They haven't really made eye contact like this since Mike had come to visit in California and he and Will got into that huge fight at the roller rink, but that was the last time until now that they'd held any eye contact for more than five seconds. Now with how Mike was staring at him, Will thought he just might burst. It took everything in him not to smile, but he did it anyway because looking into Mike's eyes just made him feel so happy that he couldn't help it.

Mike lets out a small laugh, resting his forehead against Will's, all of that tension from moments ago finally starting to slip away. Will chuckles and snorts a little bit, one of Mike's hands finding its way to cup Will's cheek, the other still planted firmly on the dresser, his fingers holding the edge of the letter in place.

"All this time I thought that you were just being weird about your best friend dating your sister," Mike says, and that causes Will to laugh even more, his eyes crinkling shut as his head falls against Mike's chest.

"What? If that was the case then we should've been fine ages ago."

"Not when I was as scared as I was about you finding out– about anyone finding out."

"I know the feeling," Will says, looking Mike in the eyes once again.

"At least now we know."

Mike leaves a soft kiss on the tip of Will's nose before his arms snake under Will's, pulling him into a hug. They haven't hugged since Will moved to Cali, and that was three years ago now. Three whole years without them having really touched each other at all. The closest thing they'd gotten to their usual comfortability was Mike placing his hand on Will's shoulder once he'd found out that Vecna was still alive, and that he was still a threat. That the Mind Flayer was back, too, and that the two weren't going to stop until everyone was dead.

Will rests his head on Mike's shoulder, the two of them holding each other so gently and yet so tightly at the same time. Will feels warm and fuzzy, like he's on the top of the world. He had been right after all about Mike not having changed, he had just gone about how he dealt with his feelings differently, and Will was glad that he'd picked up on it, because he knows what it's like to be in Mike's position. The being scared of people knowing the truth about who you are and who love, but Will is glad that now he knows, because now he's not alone. Now neither of them are alone.

[greywolfheirs]

Steddie Holidays: Secret Santa

I originally wrote this for the Fruity Four Advent run by @unclewaynemunson but I only managed to fill 4 prompts, two of which I'm publishing. This is the first of those! The idea came to mind and immediately made me laugh so I wrote it. Hope you enjoy~

Steve can’t remember whose idea it was to do a huge Secret Santa this year (definitely one of the kids) but everyone was excited about it, so he wasn’t complaining. Whatever didn’t make everyone traumatized was worth it. It’s just, well, did he have to get Nancy of all people?

Sure, he knew what to get her, but everyone still teased him about having feelings for her, and this would just be another nail in the coffin. He didn’t have feelings for her—not anymore, not when curly hair and brown eyes elicited a different face—but it would look like it if he got her something this Christmas. Besides, there was definitely something going on between her and Robin, so what better way to solve this problem than to do a simple trade with his best friend? He didn’t expect it to go as easily as it did.

“Hey, uh, do you maybe want to switch Secret Santa’s?” He asked as they pulled away from the party afterwards.

“Oh thank Christ,” she sighed, immediately pulling her slip out of her pocket and handing it over to him. “I got Johnathan, and I cannot tell you how awkward that is for me.”

Steve snorted, handing over his own paper. “I think I have an idea.”

Robin gasped when she saw the name. “No way. No way!”

“Yes way,” Steve laughed.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” Robin asked, taking Steve’s hand and squeezing it.

“Not as much as you tell me you love her.”

“Shut up, dingus.” Robin’s blush was visible from the corner of Steve’s vision.

----

That night, hanging out with Argyle, Johnathan, and Eddie at the Munson trailer, Steve found himself laying on the floor next to Argyle, high as a kite. He wasn’t sure what their previous conversation had been about, but they somehow got onto the topic of Secret Santa.

“It’s like, man, I love all you dudes and we’ve gone through some mad shit together, but I do not know what any of you are like on the inside,” Argyle was saying. “Like, who you are as people, yes. What material goods you enjoy? No way.”

“Hmm,” Steve said eloquently. He was watching Eddie and Johnathan walk to the kitchen and grab beers.

“Like if I’d gotten Johnathan, I know, you know? Everyone else is a big mystery.”

Steve took a moment to process those words. Eddie was saying something animatedly to Johnathan in the kitchen and his rings kept reflecting light. It was distracting. What were they talking about? Oh yeah. “I have Johnathan if you want to trade.”

“Dude, seriously?” Argyle turned his head toward Steve at this. He pulled a slip of paper from his breast pocket.

Steve nodded, reaching in his jeans for his own slip of paper and handing it over. Will, the new slip said. Steve could work with that. He slipped it back into his pocket and went back to watching Eddie’s rings.

----

“Come on assholes, let’s go,” Steve yelled, bounding down the stairs of the Wheeler’s basement two days later. “You were supposed to be done half an hour ago.”

The kids, to their credit, were actually packing up, although Mike was in the corner with Lucas, whispering feverishly. They all ignored Steve, but he could tell they’d heard. Eddie, already packed up by the looks of it, bounded over, bumping Steve’s shoulder.

“Don’t worry mama hen, all your little ducklings will be ready soon,” he said.

“That’s two different birds,” Steve pointed out.

Eddie put a dramatically affronted hand to his chest. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were an ornithologist, Steve.”

“A what now?”

“Steve!” That was Mike, whisper-yelling at an uncomfortably close range and pulling him away from Eddie. “I need to talk to you.”

Steve made a can-you-believe-this-kid face at Eddie but allowed himself to get dragged away. They were in the same corner Mike had been in with Lucas earlier.

“Who do you have for Secret Santa?” Mike asked immediately.

Steve rolled his eyes. “The whole point is to not tell you.”

Mike huffed. “Look, there’s a reason I’m asking. You don’t have to tell me if its me, I just need to figure out who has Will.”

“Why?” Steve asked.

“It doesn’t matter,” Mike said quickly, blush quickly rising on his cheeks. “Do you have Will or not.”

Steve sighed. “Yes.”

“Wait, really?” When Steve nodded, Mike asked excitedly, “Can we trade?”

Steve debated it but, well, he knew nearly everyone right? And Mike seemed so determined to get Will, he probably had a big plan. So he nodded.

“Thanks!” Mike said, with a smile Steve was rarely on the other end of. He handed a slip to Steve. Steve didn’t bring his slip, but he didn’t really need it. “I owe you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Steve said, covertly slipping the paper into his pocket so the others wouldn’t see. “Just make sure you get Will something nice, alright?”

Mike nodded and raced to pack up. Steve looked over to find Eddie giving him a questioning look. Steve shrugged in response.

He was parked in his driveway before he remembered to check who he’d traded Mike for. He stared at the paper a long time, making sure he wasn’t imagining the letters. Eddie, it said. Steve was glad he was alone in his car, because he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to explain the smile that crossed his lips at that moment.

----

Three days later, Dustin called Steve’s house.

“Dude, please tell me you got someone I actually know for Secret Santa,” he said when Steve answered.

“What if I do?” Steve asked.

Dustin sighed heavily on the other line. “I got Argyle. The only thing that dude likes is weed, and I’m not even old enough to buy beer.”

“Mmm, yeah tough pull dude,” Steve said unsympathetically.

“Trade with me Steve! Pleeeeease?” Dustin begged.

“Gonna have to turn you down there, Dustybun,” Steve said. “You know how the rules work. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

“Oh, come on,” Dustin pleaded. “I know Mike’s been trading for Will, and I’m pretty sure I saw Max trade hers with Nancy the other day.”

“Well, just because other people break the rules doesn’t mean I will,” Steve said. “Get Argyle a pizza, that dude’s super chill.”

“But—”

“Nope, I’m hanging up now,” Steve interrupted, already moving the receiver away from his ear, hearing the distant yell of his name before putting it in the cradle.

----

It was worth it to see the way Eddie’s eyes sparkled when he found out who his present had been from.

[notebooknonbinary]

All the Time in the World Chapter 3 is posted!

A brief, unhappy conversation with Owens before the Party (sans Max) meet up at the Arcade.

I hope you all enjoy! Thank you @buck-yyyy for reading an earlyyyy draft of this ewfinwmf

Chapter below the cut for non-Ao3 people:)

(Trigger warning for past suicidal thoughts and discussion of mental health)

Will is enjoying his last long weekend before school, hanging out with Mike. They’re in the Wheeler’s basement (though it took a lot of careful hopping on Mike’s part), playing Super Mario Bros. It’s just the two of them and Nancy in the house. Mike’s dad is at work and Karen is out doing last minute school shopping, taking Holly with her. Nancy’s upstairs, two closed doors and two flights of stairs between her and them. 

Which means Mike and Will are free to sit closer than best friends would. They’ve been boyfriends for four wonderful days. The giddy newness of it has yet to wear off, and Will’s beginning to understand how Mike and El had had trouble with time management back at the beginning of their relationship. So much so that Will deliberately sat Mike down yesterday to make sure they made time for their friends too—Mike had laughed when Will pulled out a schedule book, but he’d quickly warmed to it after he saw Will write down things like ‘kissing break’ and ‘hold hands under the popcorn when we go to the movies with the Party’ . They’re hanging out with their friends (unfortunately minus Max, who is still in the hospital) this evening. Which gives them the whole afternoon with just the two of them. 

Mike’s casted leg is propped up on the coffee table, a pop of color against the old and dull wood—covered in drawings by Will and Holly, as well as all his friends' signatures and own little doodles. It’s been fun filling up the empty spaces with his art—tiny versions of the Party’s DnD characters, a shield with a heart (he’d gotten a kiss for that one), a wizard to go with the unicorn that Holly had drawn. And for a lot of the drawings, Mike’s cast would be draped in Will’s lap for ease of access…which had the added bonus of making Mike blush. Mike is very pretty when he blushes. It makes Will want to paint him and press butterfly kisses to the bright spots on his face. 

Right now, however, he’s focused on playing Mario with him. And, maybe, occasionally (lightly) shoving him to try and make him lose. Mike gives as good as he gets, but he’s more easily distracted than Will. Which means he jumps when there’s a knock on the basement door.

“Phone for you two,” Nancy calls down. 

On-screen, Mike dies. He mutters a curse, as Mario emits a pathetic little ‘oh no!’ Will lets a gleeful laugh as he completes the level solo. 

“Thank you Nancy,” he calls up. Mike gives him a dirty look. Will springs up to answer the phone, blowing a half-sarcastic kiss at Mike as he passes. “Hello?”

“Will, heads up to you and Mike,” Dustin answers. Will immediately sobers up at the serious tone in his friend’s voice. “Owens is on his way to chat with you guys.”

Will’s stomach drops. “Owens? Why?”

Mike hops up to join him by the phone. Will reaches out to lace their fingers together and allows him to listen in.

“Checking up on us mostly. Nothing bad , really…just, I just wanted to call you so it doesn’t come out of nowhere.”

“Thanks Dustin,” Will murmurs.

“No problem,” Dustin says. He pauses for a moment. “We’re still on for later, right?”

“Arcade with everyone, yeah, as far as I know.” He looks in askance at Mike, who nods. “Mike’s still coming too.”

“Cool, cool. See you then.”

After they’ve hung up and sat back down, Will discusses the odd call with Mike.

“I’m not eager to see Owens again,” Mike grumbles. He’s burrowed his way under Will’s arm. “If I never have to talk to anyone from the Lab ever again it’ll still be too soon.”

Will shrugs his free shoulder, petting a hand over Mike’s hair. He’s had to interact with the people from the lab more than anyone bar El. He knows that not all of them were horrible people, but it doesn’t make him want to send any of them yearly Christmas cards or something. Even Owens, who, after what El’s told him, is the most trustworthy one of the bunch. He spent an extra month having to see the man when he was still in the hospital, so he’s slightly tired of the man’s presence. 

Still, he’ll listen to whatever Owens has to say, if only to make him go away faster—so that Will can go back to spending the day with Mike.

-

“Therapy?” Mike is frowning and picking at his cuticles. Will itches to take his hand. He crosses his arms instead, staring Owens down. The three of them are in the living room, with the coffee table separating the doctor from the teens.

Honestly, he should have expected this suggestion to be coming. He had to do some therapy when he first returned from the Upside Down (though he now knows that the sessions had been watched and discussed amongst the Bastard Scientists). It yielded him a diagnosis of PTSD that Will hasn’t told anyone outside of his family about—except for Mike. He has a feeling that diagnosis isn’t changing anytime soon. 

Owens gives them a sad smile. “Needing therapy doesn’t make you weak.” He shrugs. “These days, I’m in therapy.”

Though this is a shock, after a moment of thinking, it makes sense. Owens had to watch as so many of his coworkers died a few years ago, he’d been tortured by the army, not to mention all that had happened the past year.

And if he’s willing to admit to it, maybe it wouldn’t be such a terrible idea to at least think about. As long as it’s not at the Lab (long gone, thankfully), Will might actually talk this time. But that’s only if he does go, which he’s really not sure about.

“And you won’t make us go?” Will asks quietly. 

Owen’s eyes soften. “Of course not.” He looks tired and a little sad. “Goodness knows you children have had enough interactions with doctors to last three lifetimes, if you’d rather not.”

There’s a moment of quiet.

“ If we go,” Mike says. “And that’s a big if, what’s to stop them from marking us down as crazy for talking about monsters?”

“These therapists will all sign NDAs, and will be somewhat let in on the situation,” Owens says. “So that you can be as honest with them as you’d like to.”

“Will they tell anyone else what we tell them?” Mike asks. He’s gnawing on his lip again. “Like you guys or our parents?”

“Only if they feel you’re a danger to yourself or others,” Owens says. That sets some of Will's latent worries to rest, but it doesn’t seem to make Mike any less anxious. He might bite through his lip if he chews at it much more. Will needs to get Owen to leave so Mike can calm down. 

“We’ll talk about it,” Will blurts. “With our parents too.”

Owens nods, taking the clear dismissal with an easy smile. “Alright. Well, I’ve got a few more stops to make. You boys, take care.”

Will shares a quick look with Mike, as Owens walks away— So, we can talk about the Upside Down, but we probably shouldn’t talk about us being boyfriends.

Mike frowns and finally stops chewing on his lip. His shoulders have stopped hunching around his ears now that the doctor is gone, thankfully. But being gay isn’t seen as a mental illness anymore, right?

Will tries to shrug unobtrusively. Not technically, I think. But if the therapist is a homophobe, then they could try and recommend us for conversion therapy. He pauses, sighs. There’s a pandemic going on that people are trying to blame on gay people , Mike.

Mike grimaces. Oh…yeah .

They sit in unhappy silence for a moment. In his own mind, Will grapples with the other thing he will be unable to tell any therapist—that he has been a danger to himself in the past. And knowing what little he knows about mental health (which isn’t much, to be honest), he’s pretty sure that means he could be a danger to himself in the future.

He’ll have to talk to Jonathan about it.

Jonathan is the only one who knows that Will was considering taking himself out of the Vecna fight—in a more permanent fashion. Will hadn’t wanted to be a pawn to Vecna, had been terrified of becoming possessed again. So he thought he might try to take himself out of the equation. But Jonathan found the letter Will had written for him too early, stopped him from leaving town. (Because Will somehow knew if he tried to kill himself while he was still in Hawkins, Henry would intervene.) 

Jonathan had begged him to try and find a different solution. And they had . Even if he’d had to suffer going through the Upside Down two more times—at least both times he’d had Mike with him.

So, it’s not impossible that Will might consider death again in the future (between that time, and the time when he was possessed, there’s a precedent). But as of right now, Will is entirely too happy and in love (and loved back!!) to do more than occasionally, passively, wish for death. 

The normal amount.

Will’s not told Mike any of this—and he’s so grateful that either Vecna had never reached that point when showing Mike Will’s memories, or that Will had been selfishly thinking too much of himself instead of the people he loved, that it hadn’t been shown. He knows it would hurt Mike to know. And there’s no point in telling him.

-

He has no way of knowing that Mike is thinking along similar lines.

-

The Quarry doesn’t count , Mike tells himself, being extra sure to keep that thought from Will. It wasn’t because I wanted to die. I just wanted to keep Dustin safe. He has to bite his tongue so he doesn’t go back to chewing on his lip. He already knows Will’s caught on to that anxious tick.

He also knows he’s lying to himself. He well remembers what his own Vecna vision brought back to the surface. He knows that the thoughts he’d had that night—both the real one and the remembered one—were what someone might call suicidal.

But that doesn’t matter anyway, because Will is alive and not going anywhere. They’re dating and in love and happy, and Mike might be going to therapy. While he isn’t exactly thrilled about that last one, it might help with the nightmares, and the anxiety, and the days where he’s so down it’s hard to find the strength to get out of bed.

“What do you think?” Will hums, bringing Mike out of his thoughts. “It might help, yeah?”

Mike shrugs. “Maybe…”

In the end Will and Mike both agree to give it a try. If it doesn’t seem to work, they can always quit. And no one will be able to say they didn’t at least try.

The rest of the Party, they learn that evening, unsurprisingly, will also be trying it out. That makes him feel a little better about his and Will’s decision. At least they’ll all go through it together.

They have the arcade to themselves, practically. Only the single cashier, sitting lazily behind the counter, reading a magazine. Which is probably good, considering their conversation.

“Yeah, it was a pretty easy decision. Ma’s been real worried about me,” Dustin admits, rubbing his neck a little anxiously. He leans on the Pac-man machine, waiting for his turn. He’s fidgeting with his cane. “Especially since finding out everything.”

Lucas nods, half distracted by the game. He’s not even close to Max’s highscore, but it doesn’t seem to bother him. “Our parents too. Dad flipped his shit when he found out about Starcourt.”

Erica huffs. “I still don’t get why we had to tell them everything . It freaked them out. Mom only agreed to tonight because she drove us here.”

Will laughs. “That sounds familiar. It’ll take them a couple months to ease off, if my mom is any measure.”

Mike shoots him an incredulous look. She’s still overprotective, what are you talking about ?

Will nudges him. Talk out loud, dummy. “The first year after I was back, Mom got anxious if we were in different rooms, let alone going to the arcade.”

Mike nods to concede the point. Inviting Will along to Party hangout the first couple months was generally hit-or-miss if it wasn’t at one of their houses. Joyce had been happiest when they were all at her house where she could keep an eye on them. She had, of course, eventually loosened up--but he knows that she’s likely still anxious about it. She just hides it better, these days.

He wonders if Joyce will be going to therapy as well.

Speaking of…

“We probably should have been in therapy years ago,” Lucas says, sighing as Pac-man loses his last life. He steps back as Dustin nudges him out of the way for his turn. “Even putting aside all the freaky shit, that first November was…rough.”

Mike shudders, thinking, again, of Will’s prone, cold (fake!) body. “That’s a hell of an understatement.”

Mike knows that the other parents' easy acceptance is largely due to their semi-new knowledge of the Upside Down and all the traumas that had spawned from it. Even though the place is gone, and Vecna dead and rotting, it’s left scars far deeper than the sealed cracks that trail up Main Street.

(The only parent that isn’t aware of its (past) existence is Mike’s father. There’d been a silent consensus among the other parents—including Mike’ mom—to keep Ted Wheeler out of it.)

“I don’t like the thought of more doctors,” El admits, leaning into her brother. Will wraps an arm around her shoulders. “But I will try for a little while, to make Dad and Mom happy.”

“Max’s promised that she’ll try her best too,” Lucas murmurs. “I wish I’d known how bad she’d been getting last year.” He looks sad and guilty, and, almost, aged by the weight of everything.

Mike’s heart hurts. “You can’t blame yourself for what happened to Max, it’s--” Mike pauses, grimaces. “--it’s really hard to ask for help when you’re struggling with grief. Besides, you and El saved her.”

Lucas looks unconvinced. El takes his hand, a comforting gesture. “My dad says if we focus only on the what-ifs, we will forget to live life.”

Dustin nods seriously. “Focus on what’s true. Max is alive and awake. We’re gonna try therapy. And I’m about to kick your butt at Gauntlet.”

Lucas laughs. “Might wanna check that last fact again.”

It breaks the dower mood down the middle, letting them all settle into a more relaxed state. Lucas and Dustin converge on the nearby machine, while El and Erica begin to drift towards other games, chatting about…magic horses? Mike doesn’t get it, but El seems enthralled.

“You know,” Will murmurs, catching Mike by the elbow before he can follow—letting the others get farther away. “We could technically count this as our first date.”

Mike immediately trips over his cast, almost falling flat on his face. Will catches his arm in time, half laughing and half concerned. “Holy shit, are you alright?”

“...’M fine.” Mike has trouble speaking over his fluster. Because Will is right , this could potentially count as a first date. “Do you…do you want to count it as that?”

Will shrugs, smiling a little shyly. “Group date, maybe. Like Max and Lucas did at the movies with us.” 

Mike doesn’t really like thinking of those weeks leading up to the battle at Starcourt, but going to the movies with Will— and Max and Lucas, had been a highlight. Sitting next to Will in a dark room, hands occasionally touching when they both reached for candy. He hadn’t acknowledged the fluttering in his stomach whenever their eyes would meet. 

Still, he knows that Lucas and Max had gone on other, separate dates. He wonders if he might be able to subtly enquire what kind of activities they’d done. It might give him so ideas for the future.

I think our First Date , he thinks the words with emphasis and is gratified to see Will’s blush darken. Should be just us. But yeah, for now, I’m cool with calling this a group date if you are.  

Will brushes his pinky with Mike’s. “Cool. Then let’s go kick Dustin’s ass at Gauntlet. Lucas just beat him.”

Not for the first time, Mike wishes it were safe to hold hands in public. He wants to lace their fingers together. He wants to treat this like a normal date.

He tries to think on what little he knows about real dating. It doesn’t amount to much. There’s never been any adults he’s felt comfortable going to for advice about it. And he can hardly count the time he was dating El—they’d never really had the opportunity to go on real dates. And if sitting in one of their bedrooms kissing reading comics and playing games counts , then he and Will already have it perfected.

Then Mike thinks to Nancy coming home from dates—first with Steve, then Jonathan; sometimes she’d come home with trinkets—gifts. He thinks of Lucas giving Max stickers to decorate her skateboard with. The blush she’d pretend to not have, even as they all saw her smile at her boyfriend. 

And his brain finally lights on an idea.

With new resolve, Mike sets his eyes on the enemy: the claw machine. There are two of them, one with stuffed animals and a weak grip strength, and one that’s easier, but the prizes aren’t as good. Everyone in the Party knows Mike sucks at them, but if this is a date, he needs to win something for Will. And not a shitty little keychain. A real prize. It’s, like, boyfriend law or something. So he’s determined. 

Over the course of the night, whenever Will is distracted by the others, or gone up to the counter for snacks, Mike speeds (for any given value of speed, considering his leg) back over to the claw machine. And he has the perfect gift in mind, if only he could get it with the stupid, loose-grip of the claw.

Seventy-five cents. 

Two dollars.

Three.

Eight.

Twelve . 

It finally happens just before Jonathan is due to pick Mike and Will up (El’s already gone, having gotten permission to have a sleepover with Max at the hospital, to make up for the fact that she’s missing Party night). The metal hooks grip just right over the garish yellow fur of the toy.

“Nice,” a voice cheers quietly from behind him, as the stuffed animal drops into the slot. Mike jolts and turns to face Dustin’s grinning face. “Is that for Will? Since—”

“Shhh,” Mike hisses. He hopes any blush on his face might be mistaken as the arcade’s lack of functioning air con. “It’s a surprise!”

Dustin snorts, rolling his eyes fondly. “Whatever you say, man. Anyway, Steve’s here to pick me up. You and Will gonna be okay waiting for Jonathan?” Lucas and Erica got picked up ten minutes before, so it’s just the three of them. 

“Yeah, I think we’ll just hang around here for a while longer.”

After Dustin is gone, Mike scoops the stuffed toy out of the machine and goes in search of Will. He finds his boyfriend in the midst of beating Dustin’s Pac-man score and Mike grins, hiding the toy behind his back before he speaks.

“Kicking a man’s high score when he’s not here to defend himself, Byers?”

Pac-man crashes into the pink ghost and dies. Will huffs, not really annoyed. He turns to lean against the machine, his beaming grin devious. “It’s just too funny to see the look on his face when we show up the next time and someone’s in his place.”

He’s not wrong. So Mike shrugs and grins. The movement emphasizes the fact that his arms are behind his back. Will cranes his neck curiously. “What’s that?”

For a brief second, Mike doubts his idea. What if Will doesn’t like it? But he looks at Will’s sweet, curious smile, takes a deep breath, and pulls the stuffed tired from behind his back.

Will’s smile is everything . 

“It’s for you,” Mike murmurs, holding the toy out. Will takes it, still beaming like he’s made of sunlight. “I hope tigers are still your favorite animal…”

“Oh she’s so cute!” Will says, nodding and hugging the tiger to his chest. “Thank you for braving the claw machines for me, I know they’re a little rigged.”

Mike thinks about his significantly more empty wallet and shrugs. “Worth it.”

Will fidgets with the fur on the tiger for a moment, blushing. Then he gently bumps his shoulder against Mike’s and jerks his head towards the door. “Hey, let’s go wait for Jonathan outside.”

They sit down together on the curb, silently watching the few cars passing by, and sitting perhaps a tad too close for normal standards. But the parking lot is long deserted. Mike manages to brave taking Will’s hand in the tiny space between them. He immediately feels warmer when Will laces their fingers together.

“I… also might have stopped by the claw machines earlier,” Will says into the cool air. He digs into his jacket pocket with the hand that isn’t holding Mike’s. “I didn’t think to try and get you a stuffed animal, but, well, I may have evened my odds a little bit—” He raises an eyebrow to emphasize the mental powers . “—to get you something too.”

He blushes as he hands it over.

It’s one of those double chained best friend necklaces that kids break in half to share. There’s a tiny silver heart with a split down the middle to separate them. 

Mike feels himself begin to grin, as Will speaks. “I thought maybe, I dunno, I could paint them or something. Just to make them more specific for us, or--If you think it’s stupid--” Will hunches, beginning to look doubtful. Mike has to make sure he knows there’s no reason.

“Will, I love this . I’m gonna wear mine ‘til the chain breaks.”

Will blushes and stuffs his face into the stuffed animal in his lap. “Okay.”

They, unfortunately, have to detach their hand holding to put the necklaces on. 

Mike kind of wonders if it makes him weird, that he likes that he and Will are matching. Then he thinks about how they’ve been wearing the same matching watches since elementary school, and he decides he doesn’t care if they’re weird.

“I like this,” Mike tells him, taking his hand again. “Thank you Will.”

“Thank you Mike,” Will hums and leans against him. “I had fun tonight.”

“Me too.” Mike grins at him. “I think we’re not half bad at this boyfriends’ thing.”

If they weren’t currently in public, Mike would want to press a kiss to Will’s cheek. But even though he feels safe enough to hold Will’s hand (hidden as they are), a kiss--even on the cheek--would likely be a death sentence.

Will’s stomach suddenly rumbles. “Hope Jonathan comes soon. Hopper’s cooking tonight.”

“ Hopper ?”

Will giggles. “He’s actually a really good cook. Something he picked up when he was in the army. It’s mostly breakfast-for-dinner—but Mom loves it, especially since it means she doesn’t have to try and cook.”

“So, he and your mom are, like, official -official then,” Mike says. He’s thought as much, considering all the hand holding and hugs and general living together Hop and and Joyce have been doing--but for all Mike knew, it could have been a platonic co-parenting thing. He apparently isn’t very good at recognizing Straight romance versus platonic, so either wouldn’t have been surprising at this point.

Will nods. “She really loves him. And he loves her. After everything, I’m glad they found each other.”

“They deserve to be happy,” Mike agrees. He wonders for a moment, if Hopper would echo the sentiment in return--and quickly decides that’s a thought to shelf and think about never .

There’s a honk and they both look up. “Ready to go?” Jonathan calls out.

Will helps Mike to his feet and hands him his crutch.

“Thank you, kind sir,” Mike whispers. Will laughs and keeps up the sudden burst of gallantness by opening up the car door and fake bowing.

“Your carriage, Sir Knight.”

They’re both still giggling, leaning against each other, when Jonathan pulls out of the parking lot. Will’s older brother makes a happy noise, turning down the radio. “Had a good time then?”

They take turns talking about their evening (omitting a few details, of course). Will shows Jonathan the stuffed tiger, which makes his brother smile—tickled.

When they get back to the Wheeler house, the three sit in silence for a moment. Mike’s reluctant to say goodnight to Will (he’s gotten used to a hug and kiss), but he’s also not willing to say as much in front of Jonathan. Even if the couple suspects that he knows about them, it’s still a worry. Before Mike can figure out what to do, Jonathan speaks.

“I’m just gonna head in for a sec, say goodnight to Nancy.”

Jonathan leaves with a gentle, knowing smile. And the second the door shut, neither Mike or Will can help breaking out into giggles yet again.

“Wow. That was. Not subtle,” Will laughs.

Mike leans into Will, still snorting. “To be fair, he and Nancy are the sappy type to want to see each other just to say hi for ten seconds.”

“Michael, we’re the sappy type that would want to see each other just to say hi.”

“...” This is true.

It takes a long moment for it to register that Jonathan leaving means they’re alone . Which means, if Mike wants to kiss his boyfriend goodnight, he’s safe to do so. And, like a hundred other times, his eyes flicker down to Will’s lips.

They pull into a smile. “Are you gonna kiss me or not, Mike?”

Mike takes the invitation. 

Will’s lips are soft, as--Mike’s come to realize--they always are. They’ve kissed a number of times over the past couple of days, but each time feels like the very first--that rush of adrenaline down Mike’s back, the warmth and love running like an electric wire between them. Will presses closer, threading a hand into Mike’s hair. He wants to stay in this moment forever, even knowing they’re on borrowed time.

It takes a very long minute for Mike to force himself to pull away. “There’s only so long Jon can say hi to Nancy before my mom starts to wonder where I am,” he whispers against his boyfriend’s lips.

Will sighs regretfully and presses one more kiss to the corner of Mike’s mouth. “Alright Mike. Talk tomorrow?”

“Always.” Mike pauses, squeezes Will’s hand. “Love you.”

“I love you too.”

[blurberries]

The Older Wheeler | part two

Eddie Munson x F! Oc

Part one here

wc - 1,873

CW - Mental breakdown, insecurities, self-deprecating (let me know if i forgot some 🩷)

*not my gif ~

Hawkins High, Lunch time

Mike, Dustin and Lucas, were all sitting in the cafeteria with the rest of Hellfire, having heated conversations about the emplacement for the next campaign. They had just learned that the drama club, from who they borrowed the room, needed it. They were all tense, the campaign was too important, they had to do it tonight, not tomorrow, not in a week, tonight. Eddie had been very clear on that. They were all debating, giving ideas but another would find a problem with it. It couldn't be done outside because of the wind, it couldn't be done at the pizzeria, too many people. Mike had been the most silent, rummaging on his options, taking in the ideas, rejecting them, until...

"I GOT IT!"  Mike declared, receiving questioning looks from the table. "Okay so, my family's staying at my grandparents for the spring break, my parents left this morning with my little sister, and Nancy's joining them right as school ends. So basically, the house will be empty, perfect condition for D n D."

Dustin gave him a small kick under the table and Lucas, looking at him worried, spoke through his teeth.

"Hey are you sure? Aren't you forgetting something?"

"No? El and Will are only coming over monday."

Dustin let his forehead hit, if not smash, the table, while Lucas looked upwards in a loud sigh.

Mike looked at the two of them confused, you could see gears turning inside his head. If you thought Mike Wheeler couldn't be paler, you'd be wrong, as he was almost translucid upon realization.

"Got something you wanna share with the rest of us?" Eddie asked with his brows furrowed in confusion and suspicion.

Mike blurted out that everything was fine, he just had to make a phone call. He got up with his tray in hand, while Gareth loudly said, "Yea! Go make sure your mommy's okay with it." followed by "Ouch! What the fuck man?" after Eddie gave him a smack behind the head. The young Wheeler put his tray away, ran out of the cafeteria and to the phone outside the school, quickly dialing his house's phone number. He waited until he reached the voicemail. 

"Hi, you've called the Wheeler's residence, we're busy right now, please leave a message!"

"Hey Liz, its Mike, can you pick up please?"

Almost immediately, Elizabeth picked up the phone.

"What's up?"

"I've got a major favour to ask!"

"Go on."

"So, you know, the whole family is out for the week..."

"And you want to invite Lucas and Dustin?"

"More like the whole club..."

There was a short pause before Elizabeth spoke again.

"So Lucas and Dustin..."

"No! There's also Eddie, Gareth, Grant and Jeff."

"Mike, I don't know, that's a lot of people and mom will kill me if she learns I let that happen. She clearly told you: No parties."

"Liz! Please! I already told them they could come over!"

Mike was getting anxious as Elizabeth thought about it.

"Please, I will clean up after, I promise. It's not a party, we'll be in the basement, we won't break anything, just- please, I have to do this."

She kept silent as she was planning her own night. Let out a loud sigh.

"I'm guessing you need me out of your way to play with your friends?"

"Well, it's not like you ever get out of your bedroom anyway..."

Liz was annoyed; not that he was entirely wrong, but not entirely right either. She had made a lot of progress and she just wished someone would see it.

"Whatever Mike."

"Really? It's alright? I can tell them? And you won't tell mom and dad?"

"Yes. It is, i’ll even make you some pizzas, can I hang up now?"

"Yea yea, cool, also don't forget to clear the voicemail."

And just like that, Elizabeth's little brother hung up, and ran back to the cafeteria to tell his friends. Eddie pulled him by the shoulder and gave it a light squeeze and an amused grin. Although he couldn't help but wonder what the young boys deal was.

Back at home, Elizabeth looked at the phone and pondered whether she should delete the message, or let her parents find out.  She didn't want her parents to be disappointed in her more than they already were, and she didn't want Mike hating her to top it off. She could already imagine the scenarios, them screaming at her for not being responsible, for letting strangers into the house while they were away, for saying the least she could do if she stayed at home was make sure everything was in order. She wouldn't be able to take it, she already knew all of that.  After weighing out the pros and cons, she figured that deleting it was the safest option. She then made her way to the kitchen and prepared ingredients to make pizza from scratch. She knew how in the game they get, so much that they'd forget food was even a thing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the Wheeler's, 7pm. Elizabeth Wheeler's pov.

Knowing it was going to be a long night, I took the time to shower, eat a slice of pizza from the ones I had made for Mike and his friends, and picked some animated movies before they arrived, starting with a classic, Peter Pan. I was now lying in bed watching a kid's movie, as I did every time there was company over, it was best to avoid them as to not get put in a situation where escaping could be harder to do.

  I heard a car pulling in the driveway, it wasn't usual for the kids to get dropped off by their parents, most of the time they'd be on their bikes. I peeked out of the window to know who arrived first, and saw a van I hadn't seen before, and all the kids came out at once... "I swear, if they asked a complete stranger for a drive..." but, they were quickly followed by some guys whose faces I didn't recognize, I assumed it was the rest of the club from the design on their shirt. The roaring coming from the engine stopped, the driver's door opened, and a small knock was heard at my door, I quickly turned my head away from the window, and towards the door instead, a small "Yea?" leaving my lips.

"Hey Liz, I wanted to let you know that the guys are here, we'll be in the basement as usual so just don't come downstairs." The front door opened, letting the peace-disrupting teenagers in.

"I know, I heard them loud and clear, I won't disrupt your little gathering, don't worry." I spoke loud enough so he could hear me from the hallway. "Go get your friends before they break something, and we get shit for it."

"Hey! I told you we wouldn't brea-" He was cut off buy a somewhat familiar voice, one way deeper than any of Mike's gang, that got louder as he got closer.  

"Wheeler! You talking to yourself over there?". I could hear some shuffling behind the door.

"No, yea, no, sorry, it's just I thought I'd left something in there but couldn't find it."

"Huh, what's in there anyways?"

"Oh nothing, just a storage room, it's fucking mess you don't wanna go in there, trust me. Let's go downstairs, everything's set up there."

Ouch. I got that he was embarrassed and ashamed of me, but couldn't he have been a bit gentler? Not that he was wrong, I was indeed, a fucking mess. 

That little comment was enough to change the entire mood of the night, so I closed the TV. Fuck the movies and fuck those stupid pizzas I had made for them. I just wanted to go to bed, but between the commotion happening underneath my bedroom, the overthinking, and all the fucking pent-up anxiety, I just couldn't. I was left alone, with my mind. I felt like a fucking failure. I brought shame to the family, I was a high school dropout barely months away from graduating, what a nice example for my siblings, right? Dad made sure to remind me every now and then. Mom would give him a look; he'd just shrug and that was that. Not only was I a horrible daughter, but I was also a much worst sister. I wasn't there for Mike when Will disappeared, I wasn't there for Nance when Barb died or when she broke up with Steve. Hell, I wasn't even there to watch Holly grow up; I was like a stranger to her. My blood ran cold, it hit me. I wasn't just a stranger to her, but to my whole family, and it was like I never existed to the whole town. It wouldn't make a difference if I just left and never came back. Not like I could do it anyway, sure I was able to leave the house more and get things done, but I'd still have panic attacks if I was out for too long. I was having a major breakdown, and the same thoughts running through my head every time I had one. "I'm sorry I can't do better, I'm sorry I'm such a failure, I don't want to be this way, I wanna graduate, I wanna be a good daughter, a good sister, I want friends to laugh and cry with, and do stupid shit with. I wanna go out on a drive, to a restaurant, a party, anything. I don't want to be confined in my bedroom forever, I don't want to be a failure anymore, I wanna live." 

I felt stuffy, my breath was shallow after sobbing and putting myself down for almost an hour. My brother was still downstairs with the guys. They laughed audibly as I stepped out of my room, a small smile traced my lips, at least he was happy, and it was such a beautiful melody. 

I walked out to the backyard, sat on the singular swing, I took deep breaths in, closed my eyes, felt the cold wind pinch at my cheeks. Being outside like that reminded me of the only friend I had made, thinking about him I felt better, though there were still tears running down my cheeks. I wish I could've at least said goodbye and thank him for being there. I wondered if he was doing great, what he became after graduation. He must've hated me, leaving like that without saying anything, if he cared enough that is.

I don't know how long I stayed there, thinking about him and enjoying the cold, but while I felt strangely calm, it was time to get back inside in the comfort of my bed. I made a quick stop to the bathroom and brushed my teeth, contemplating how I looked. My eyes were puffy, my nose was running, and my hair was a fucking mess because of the wind. After spitting out, I rinsed my face, and lazily braided my hair. I was about to step into my bedroom, ready to discard my clothes and change into my pajamas, when I noticed a familiar curly-haired figure standing there, almost making my heart jump out of my rib cage. I was paralyzed, I couldn't say anything, I could only stare. My stranger was in my room.

•••••••••••••••••••••

Part 3 is in the writing process, let me know if there’s something you’d like to see or have any requests on how it could go ✨