#I had never drawn her well and truly PISSED

[batboyblog]

The recent Chappell Roan thing is why I absolutely hate the lack of political literacy in this country. Big-name celebrities think they're really cooking when they say "well Kamala still supports blowing up Palestinian babies because she won't cut ties with Israel, so therefore I'm not voting for her and you shouldn't either! Both her and Trump suck so I'm not voting/voting third party!"

Like it or not, Israel is an ALLY of the United States. We CAN'T just cut ties with them unless it's a long drawn-out process, and even then it's probably NEVER going to happen. This is basic shit we learned in social studies, holy shit!

Trump would be so much fucking worse for everyone involved, including Palestine, and not voting or voting third party is pretty much just handing your vote over to Trump due to how voting WORKS in a two-party system dictated by the fucked up electoral college.

This was a long ramble and you've probably gotten similar asks the last few months like this, but fuck, I just have to get this off my chest, and the most recent event with her was like the straw that broke the camel's back. Celebs in general need to shut the fuck up about politics unless they are actually partaking in activism instead of this virtue-signaling bullshit.

Taking things one thing at a time.

I'll admit to having only seen Chappell Roan's final video on the subject, so idk what she said before that (outside of generally)

The two things that really stuck out to me and pissed me off about that live/video was she 1. accused Democrats (she said "the left" but was clearly in context talking about the Democrats) for "transphobic policy" (also genocidal, equally silly) and it was SUCH a groundless lie, such a baseless, stupid, uninformed, silly lie. It'd be like saying "yes the right is bad! but Kamala Harris says she wants to shoot a pony every day of her Presidency and I can't support that!" And to be a Queer artist who's whole thing is centering Queer art, particularly drag who's got a young maybe not very informed queer fan base who's made talking about trans rights your main political thing to just lie about the nature of the threat to trans rights and trans lives at this moment is fucking awful and downright criminal.

Listen right now Republicans are aggressively attacking Democrats on trans rights. Trump went after Harris at their debate for "trans surgeries for illegal aliens in prison!" Republicans are attacking Tim Walz as "tampon Tim" for the idea that he supports trans male students having access to tampons (and other crazy transphobic attacks on him) Republicans are centering transphobia as a main campaign issue, anyone who gives a fuck about trans people in this nation should know Trump and Creepy Vance in charge of the federal government? is the nightmare. You can't claim to care about trans people or be "centering" them and not be doing all you can to stop Republicans at the ballot box this November. And both siding it and saying bullshit that somehow it will be just as bad if Democrats win is not stopping Republicans no matter how you personally vote.

The Second thing in her video that really annoyed me was she said she was voting for Harris but then had a whole word salad about how everyone needed to make up their own minds about who would be best. Basically saying that while she was voting for Harris, a vote for Trump was a reasonable conclusion people could reach. Again if you truly care about the issues she says she cares about, no, you can't vote for Trump. And again to use your platform to push "both sides" is to throw the very people you claim are your brand under the bus in the worst way.

I don't like to throw people under the bus for their family, Tim Walz' brother is a MAGA lunatic for example, but Chappell Roan talked about Republican family that "loved her" and I can't help but wonder if she was thinking of her Republican State Rep uncle, Darin Chappell. Again people can't control family members and I'm not asking anyone to come out and attack their family in public. I'm just wondering if her views on Republicans and finding a middle ground and "they still love me" is colored by Uncle Darin and not understanding he might love her and be proud of her but he still walks into the Missouri state capital and votes for abortion bans and transphobia.

to move onto the meat of your ask which I think is less about Roan in particular and more generalized about a certain type of celebrity and GenZ very on-line types. On the whole Israel-Palestine thing, I think most of the people posting about it know very little or know a lot of misinformation, you every see people boldly posting "I don't need to know everything to know right from wrong!" you run into that a lot. And I'd say yes, you do need to know a lot to comment on a complex multi generational ethnic-political conflict with many state and non-state actors.

Last night JD Vance and Tim Walz had their debate and every time there was an issue, housing costs, medical costs, gun violence, inflation, Vance would move it around to how if we just deported all the immigrants the issue would be fixed, no more drugs no more gun violence, housing would be cheap, just get rid of the people I don't like.

And I see a lot of that with Israel, "Palestine is a climate issue!" "Queer as in Free Palestine!" etc where if we just get rid of Israel it'll all be fixed. Which of course connects to long standing antisemitic ideas about Jews running the world, people happily sub in the word "Israel" or "Zionist" and then repeat the same old racism thats followed the Jews around for 1,000 years.

So long and short I think most people talking about Palestine don't know enough to talk about it, but what's worse don't really care about Palestine at all

I'm reminded here of Trump's "Deal of the Century". Oh? you don't remember it? shocker, in January 2020 Trump released a "peace plan" drawn up with no Palestinians involved, where Israel would be allowed to annex everything in the West Bank it would want, the Jordan Vally cutting Palestine off from Jordan and totally encircling it with Israel. The West Bank would be Swiss cheesed up into little pockets connected by tunnels or overpasses but with Israeli territory running through it everywhere. The Palestinians said "no!" and then Netanyahu claimed that Trump had green lit Israel to annex the land it wanted even without Palestinian agreement to the plan and without giving the Palestinians anything. There was some confusion and thankfully that didn't happen. We may never know the fully story of what stopped it, but I do think Trump agreed to annexing much of the West Bank, but pulled back under pressure from Gulf Arab Oil states who later in 2020 made peace with Israel in the Abraham Accords in an effort to stop Netanyahu's annexation plans.

any ways to point out, 1. Palestine was on the edge of annexation the end of the dream of Palestinian statehood in any meaningful sense, and where were the protests? the encampments? etc? it never comes up, 4 years ago, and all the people who live and breath this stuff never mention it? 2. We have reason to believe Trump signed off on a far-right government of Israel annexing much of the West Bank, his "peace plan" abandoned the outlines that American Presidents since Bill Clinton set forward for getting a Palestinian state on 95+% of the West Bank in favor of "what does the Israeli right want?" and again no one is talking about it in the context of this election, we know what he'll do, because he's done it before.

but again its not really about the Palestinians, its not about building a Palestinian state, its "get rid of Israel" and then what? what happens to the 9 million people who live in Israel? and people don't have a realistic answer, because its a political fantasy that if they just do X everything will magically get better, even on totally unrelated issues.

[heeseungiez]

RESOLUTION 3) become popular at school

pairings! park jay x fem!reader, sim jake x reader, mentions of heeseung x reader

synopsis! park jay always thought of you as the annoying little miss perfect who could do no wrong in the eyes of his, yours and heeseung’s parents. he wasn’t fond of you in the slightest for that very reason. but when you dropped the act after your perfect image had shattered in front of everyone, he can’t help but feel drawn to you. when he discovers another one of your secrets, he thinks he might truly have to ruin you for the whole world to know how far from perfect you truly are.

content warnings! smut (mdni! 18+), swearing, all of them are idiots, heeseung is desperate and so is jay low-key

word count! ~12k

taglist! OPEN! send an ask to be added!

a/n! i have no idea how the last part's gonna turn out i'll be very honest

masterlist | next

Good morning, Decelis!

Have you ever looked at someone and thought: “Wow, what a sad little life they lead.” Well, that’s how I feel like looking at Park Jay these days. What’s he up to anyway?

XO, Miss Decelis

Jay hated it here.

The one place where he was to be safe from you, his home, had been invaded not just by your family, but you as well. 

Okay, maybe, obviously, since his parents wanted to have a huge barbecue with the other families, but still, seeing you at his backyard made him want to dig himself a hole in the ground and stay there forever. Especially when he saw the adoring looks on his parents faces whenever they regarded you.

“We are so happy you’re healthy, Y/N,” his father said. 

His mum couldn’t keep her hands off of you, placing them on your shoulders, then cheeks to examine you. “When we heard what happened, we tried to help as much as we could.”

“And you did,” you replied with a bright smile, softly pushing his mum’s hands away from you without voicing out your discomfort at the excessive skinship. “My parents told me I was staying at your summer house in the summer?” And that you got me into the rehabilitation centre I went to.”

Well, Jay did not know that. She lived at his family’s summer house? In one of the guest rooms, he supposed. But did she snoop? Jay didn’t have that much stuff in there, but some personal things could be found here and there. He shifted in his place uncomfortably.

“Yes. That is true. But we still felt like we could do more,” Jay’s father sighed, glancing at his son. “We didn’t imagine Jay would ever let anything like this happen to you.”

And look, he probably wouldn’t. He might’ve disliked you, but what happened was fucked up and had he been there to witness it, he’d help you. Of course, he’d help you, he’s not a monster. But he wasn’t there because the last thing he wanted to do was to be stuck to your side at a party. You had your own friends.

Yet it still ate at him from the inside. 

The thing was, although Heeseung was the oldest of the four of you, getting him to actually care about something was as difficult as trying to turn a stone into a living being. So it was up to Jay to look after everyone as the second oldest. But with you, he didn’t want to do it because you annoyed him.

How? Well, this. The way his parents were fussing over you because Jay’s mum always wanted to have a daughter and apparently you were the next best thing. Plus, you were a star student and just perfection incarnate to the point literally nobody even considered the fact that you were bullied. If Jay had known, he would’ve put a stop to it before it could get any worse.

Which he also hated. That he didn’t know about it. It pissed him off that you kept it a secret and didn’t tell anyone just to remain a little miss perfect in the eyes of everyone rather than admitting that there was something wrong and you needed help. 

You glanced at him. Pursing your lips, you shook your head. “I’m sure he wouldn't if he knew,” you replied because you knew Jay well enough. 

He disliked you, but he never let you get hurt physically. Even mentally, it was mostly Jay giving you the cold shoulder rather than being an actual dick the way Heeseung had been. So while Heeseung would watch you fall just so you understood he wanted to have nothing to do with you, Jay would try to catch you.

And really, it wasn’t just his caring nature at this point. You were just so… irritating in a way Jay couldn’t describe because despite Jay’s insistence to ignore you, you’d always show up with something to get his attention over the years.

When you were thirteen, you gifted Jay a pick because you heard he liked playing the guitar.

When you were fifteen, you spent your entire savings just to gift Jay a guitar he couldn’t shut up about a few months before. That was how desperate you were for his acceptance. But it also came from a genuine, generous place in your heart where you liked to see the stunned expression on Jay’s face and the inability to hold in the smile forming on his lips.

And then at sixteen, you had heard Jay complain about losing his favourite pick somewhere in school, only for you to turn up some hours later with the pick in hand, saying that you found it on the desk of some girl in your class because she was boasting about having stolen it from the Park Jay.

“You’re too sweet, Y/N,” Jay’s mum said, grinning. “Is there anything you need now?”

“I’m good, Mrs Park, but thank you.” You shook your head, before bowing out of the conversation to join Jeonghyeon’s side again. Jay watched you bump his shoulder with a smile.

“Look after her, yeah? Clearly, she’s been through a lot.” Jay’s father approached him, patting his shoulder. 

Jay nodded. “I know, dad,” he said. “I’m trying. But we don’t share all classes.” It surprised him how bitter he sounded about it. That he couldn’t keep his eyes on you at all times. But there were many classes you had with Heeseung. 

And Jake.

The boy who had been dreamily staring at you this whole time while you mingled with the others. But they knew why. Every single time Jake would get lost at school, Jay, Heeseung and Sunghoon knew exactly where they would most likely find him (or preferably not).

“Maybe you could keep her company at the annual Sim family event for Jake. It’s coming, and I know neither of you boys usually bring dates. So take Y/N. Look after her,” Jay’s father suggested with a pointed look. It wasn’t a command, but Jay wished it had been because then he could ask you and pretend he didn’t want to.

“Yeah, dad, I will.”

But when Jay glanced at you again, laughing at something Jeonghyeon had said, he had to take a deep breath and tell himself that your face did not look angelic in the sunlight nor that your laugh was the loveliest song he had ever heard. Perhaps he could even will his guitar into repeating that exact same sound — no.

And maybe Miss Decelis would finally have something normal to say about him then, instead of constantly talking shit about his business. Seriously, calling his life sad? Who the fuck was this person to attack him like this? Had he done something to them?

It’s like now that they couldn’t attack you, they switched up to Jay and his lack of anything. But he blamed you for that. Most of his actions were driven by spite, and he could hardly be spiteful if you barely looked at him, could he? And it wasn’t his fault that he could not stop thinking of the day of Changbin’s party when he could quite literally see your boobs because your strap was falling off. Or the fact that he knew Heeseung did something shortly before even without Miss Decelis’ report.

He didn’t even realise you were standing in front of him until you spoke up. “Look, I know you don’t like me and whatever, but you don’t need to keep glaring at me,” you said, unimpressed. 

“I’m not glaring at you,” Jay responded with the same energy, looking you in the eye. “But are you going to Jake’s birthday party with someone?” he asked sarcastically, since the birthday party was more of a boast event for Jake’s parents to show off their amazing son.

“Uh, with Jeonghyeon and Hanbin?” you replied with a raised brow, confused as to why Jay would ask you this. And although Jay knew it was impossible for you to go with Jake as he was very much going to be a decorative doll tagging along with his parents the whole day, he was relieved you didn’t say he asked you to go with him. “I guess Hanbin said he’s going with some other friends, Sunoo and Jungwon? So maybe just Jeonghyeon… which also means Hee—”

“Go with me.” Jay didn’t let you finish the sentence. It made sense you would go with Jeonghyeon and Heeseung together since they were family, but Jay didn’t like to hear that either way. Whatever Heeseung’s deal with you was, Jay thought it would be better to keep you away from him. As far away as possible.

“Why?” Of course, you’d ask that.

“Because I said so.” Jay shrugged. “Is that so hard to understand?” He rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, duh?”

“Just go with me, Y/N,” Jay sighed, running a hand through his hair. He had no proper explanation for why he wanted you to go. He could say his father ordered him to do so, but you would most certainly say no in that case. And he didn’t know what force in the world actually made him want you to say yes.

“And what will I get out of it?” you asked, crossing your arms. “I imagine you might finally get Miss Decelis to say something nice about you again, but what is in it for me?”

“A thank you?” Jay offered seriously. “For everything. Not just going with me, but also all that you’ve done for me in the past while trying to befriend me. Because I do remember every single thing. Especially last year, when you brought back my pick. Honestly, I wanted to thank you then, but I was just… too stunned to speak, you could say. I still have the pick you gave me, too, and the guitar.”

“Yeah, I’d bet  you wouldn’t throw that guitar away. It cost almost as much as a whole Porsche,” you scoffed.

But Jay ignored you, pulling out the pick you gave him when you were kids from his wallet instead. “And what about this? Why do you think I wouldn’t throw this away?” he asked, shaking his head. “Look, I’m sorry for being a dick, but you were so—”

“Perfect?” you supplied for him. “See, that’s the funny thing. I used to think that being perfect would make people like me, but instead, what I got was you and Heeseung being assholes, and being thrown into a pool. I don’t even know why I tried so hard.”

“It’s our nature to want to be liked,” Jay said wisely, shrugging. “I am sorry, though. I was petty, but not any less grateful about these things.” He placed the pick into your palm, wrapping your fingers around it.

“No, it’s yours, keep it.” You shook your head, returning it to Jay. “I don’t play the guitar, so it’s useless for me.”

“Right.”

“But sure, I’ll go with you if it makes you feel better,” you said, pursing your lips. “We can start over and all that. With me not being fake, and you being less petty over it.” A smile graced your lips, and Jay hated how pretty it made you look.

“Hey, Y/N, Jay! Come eat with us!” Jake called after the both of you, a raised brow aimed at you both in a silent question — what could you two possibly be talking about?

Jake was speechless. “You’re going to my birthday party with Jay?” he asked in front of your friends as you all sat at the Academy’s courtyard, trying to process the words that had left your mouth moments ago.

“He asked me,” you replied with a shrug. “Look, he started apologising for being a dick and I would’ve felt bad if I said no after that. He still had that pick I gave him as a kid.” The frown on your lips appeared against your volition. But when you gave it to him, you liked him. Out of the three boys, you liked Park Jay the most when you were kids. When you heard he liked playing the guitar from Jeonghyeon, giving him that dark green pick with your initials carved into it in the smallest letters was your best way of conveying that. And he still had that damned pick.

“Oh yeah, he carries it in his wallet,” Jake said knowingly as if he wasn’t trying to be angry that you agreed to go to an event celebrating him with a different guy.

In your defence, whatever you had with Jake wasn’t a defined relationship. You never asked what the two of you were, and you preferred it that way for the time being, because a relationship was the last thing you wanted. You still struggled with taking care of yourself, let alone having to share that with another person, even if that person would be Jake.

“What an interesting turn of events,” Ning hummed, a smirk permanently stuck to her face.

“I said it. Weird obsession with Y/N. Not surprising,” Jeonghyeon spoke, rolling his eyes.

“Yeah, just because a guy doesn’t like you, doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to fuck you,” Ning added, which led to a glare from Jeonghyeon, and she giggled innocently. “Look, hate-sex is a thing. Fight me.”

“Whatever.” You shook your head. “It doesn’t matter anyway. Even if I enter the building with Jay, it won’t change anything about the rest of the event. Jake’s parents plan far too meticulously for anything out of line to happen.”

“I mean, that is true. But I still don’t like it.” Jake pouted, and you cupped his cheeks, squishing them. His eyes softened as he gazed at you, turning to your friends. “Have you guys got your invitations already?”

“Yessir!” Ning saluted. 

“Cool.” Jake bit his bottom lip, turning to face you. “Me and the guys are planning an after party, so you should all come. My parents are not gonna suffocate me with unconditional praise forever, so I plan to sneak out, and y’all can just… leave on your own.”

“From your house?” Jeonghyeon asked with a raised brow, reminding everyone that the birthday event hosted by the Sims happened at the Sim residence. (Unexpectedly so.)

“Well, it’s a plan. I never said it was a logical one.” Jake deadpanned, and you had to remind yourself that Jeonghyeon and Jake have known each other as long as you have. The separation of your friend groups over the years really messed with your brain, so all of you speaking together now felt… a bit strange. But in a good way.

“Yoi, Jake, here you are.” Sunghoon approached your group. At first, he had tunnel vision on the blond boy only, but then he noticed you right next to him, and he smiled. “Oh, hey, Y/N.”

“We’re here too, you know,” said Jeonghyeon, rolling his eyes. But Sunghoon completely ignored him, and even Ning who intently glared at him for not greeting her either. Sunghoon didn’t even blink, keeping his attention on you and Jake only.

“What’s up, Hoon?” Jake asked, tilting his head to the side. It made him look so much like a golden retriever, you couldn’t help the grin that decorated your lips nor the warmth that spread through your chest.

“I need your help with my English assignment,” Sunghoon replied, not hiding the fact that he needed help. It was kind of a known fact that his English was not the best, which was why he didn’t share English class with you, Jake and Heeseung. Jay just didn’t want to bother with the higher level.

“Why don’t you ask Heeseung?” Jake raised a brow, not wanting to leave you.

“He’s not Australian.” Sunghoon blankly stared at Jake.

“Okay, okay, I get it. I’ll help you,” Jake sighed, getting up from his seat. “Don’t forget what I told you guys, okay?” He gave Jeonghyeon, Ning and you one last look, adding a kiss to your temple before joining Sunghoon’s side.

As they left and you watched them, you wondered how come Jake was so unaffected by the tweet from Miss Decelis that came out not long after your first time together. Surely, it had to be weird between the guys if they were aware, right? But then again, Jake didn’t seem uncomfortable talking about or to Heeseung either.

You wanted to ask about it, but you weren’t sure you wanted to know the answer to that question.

Good morning, Decelis!

The annual Jake Sim party is almost upon us! Who’s excited? I already RSVP’d for the event, but did you?

XO, Miss Decelis

Being at Jay’s house on your own without anyone else accompanying you was weird. Usually, you wouldn’t step foot in here unless your parents were on your tail. But today, you were there, because your mum sent you here. Apparently, she had something to pick up from Mrs Park but couldn’t make the trip herself, so you were the one who was sent on a mission to the house.

But you clearly didn’t time your visit correctly because the person who opened the door for you was none other than Jay.

He smirked at the sight of you, his eyes roaming from head to toe before fixating on your own. Today, you didn’t bother wearing contacts, so your casual look with glasses on was back for a time being. It was the weekend, after all, and you had nobody to impress.

“Missed me?” Jay said a bit too confidently for your liking, and you scoffed, pushing him aside to enter his house without his permission.

“Is your mum here? She has something to give to my mum, apparently.” You looked around the hallway, but it was empty.

“Funny you asked,” Jay chuckled, “‘cause Mum gave it to me to give to you. Wait here, I’ll go get it. It’s in my room.”

You let out a sigh, looking around you again, not liking how eerie the hallway felt when it was so empty. Usually, whenever you were here, it was with other people, and that meant this house was bustling and full of chatter. Today, it seemed like the only person inside this house was Jay. Even the faint music playing from his room (probably) creeped you out.

“Or you can go with me,” he said, noticing the discomfort in your expression. “C’mon, it’s just some files for your mum, so it’s on my desk right now.”

Without thinking much about it, Jay took your hand in his and lightly tugged at it to get you to move. “You kinda get used to the emptiness when you live here long enough,” he added. “It’s nowhere near living in a penthouse inside a constantly packed hotel.”

“Yeah, it’s really not,” you said mindlessly, letting Jay pull you up the stairs to his bedroom. Your eyes fixated on the photos of Jay as a kid, doing all kinds of things. Cooking with his mum, playing the guitar while his dad played the piano. It was slightly different to the hall of fame dedicated to Jake at the Sim residence. And what you also noticed was the few photos that included you when you were younger, with Heeseung, Jay and Jake. You were trying to smile and be happy alongside Jake, but Heeseung and Jay had the fakest smiles possible plastered to their faces.

Your feet stopped moving then, firmly planted to the ground as you stared at the pictures for longer than was necessary. Jay had to stop with you. When he realised what you were looking at, he chewed on the inside of his cheek. Another thing to apologise for.

“If I’d known how much harder—”

“Don’t, Jay.” You shook your head, stopping him with your hand in front of his face. You softly yanked the hand that was locked with his out of his grasp and looked him in the eyes. Your stony expression spoke for itself. “I don’t like thinking about it.”

Jay pursed his lips and momentarily averted his gaze to the ground. He didn’t want you to see how guilty he felt about everything. Because he saw most of what had happened to you during the time when he was completely ignorant. When the principal found all the proof he needed to expel the people who caused you harm, your parents were brought in to see it for themselves. And when they told the other parents, Jay also found out. He didn’t tell either Heeseung, Jake or Sunghoon about it, but he knew.

The girls who bullied you kept videos of most of the things they’d done. Like spilling banana milk all over you. And the worst part was that Jay remembered the day when it happened. He knew you’d come to school in your uniform, but then spent the rest of the day in your P.E. clothes, and he never questioned why. Maybe he should’ve.

“Still—”

“There’s nothing more to say.” This time, you glared at him. The last thing you wanted was to be reminded of your past. Jay was definitely the last person you wanted to recall it with. He didn’t care then, and now it was too late to care. Besides, if you were to delve into it and he was actually trying to help you now, you’d just be more upset with him for the things he hadn’t done in the past. 

Closing his eyes, Jay nodded. “Right. Of course.”

“Let’s just get what I came here for so I can get out of your way as soon as possible,” you said with a sigh, pushing past Jay because you actually knew exactly where his room was. You never saw inside it, but you knew where it was from when you were a kid who just met him. It was the place you’d always wanted to step into, but were never allowed.

And a part of you, the old you, wanted to wait in front of the door and get Jay’s permission to enter first because that was the polite thing to do. It would also mean Jay’s approval. But there was no reason to care about it anymore. So you just opened the door to the room that was basically an equivalent of the Forbidden Forest for you.

The first thing you noticed was how big his room was. The next was the wall lined with expensive guitars as if the room was an instrument store. And third, the most important, was the guitar you had given him for his birthday when you were younger. It wasn’t on the wall with the other guitars. Instead, it hung right above his bed alongside a photo of all of you: the Parks, the Sims, the Lees, your family. You and the others had to position yourself on the ground so that your parents could all stand behind you, and it was the one photo where none of you looked miserable.

“Welcome to my room, I guess,” Jay said once he caught up to you, shoving his hands into his pockets. He didn’t want to show how nervous he was for you to see it. Maybe if he hadn’t remembered that your guitar was right above his bed, he wouldn’t have been, but… it was too late anyway.

You let out a huff, your eyes roaming the gaming setup Jay had. There was also a TV with PS4 and Xbox consoles and a Nintendo Switch laying around because why wouldn’t he have all of it?

“So, where’s the files?” you asked, glancing at him.

“Right.” Jay nodded, crossing the room. It was the plain black folder on his desk, but you didn’t want to assume and intrude more than you already have. You had some manners left in you, after all. “Here.”

You accepted the file with a grateful smile. “Thanks,” you said. “If that’s all, I’m gonna go.”

“Wait, Y/N.” Jay didn’t even know what he wanted to say. He just didn’t want this moment to be so awkward between you two. So he mindlessly grabbed your wrist to keep you in place and make you look at him. To look into his eyes.

“Yeah?” You bit your lip, and Jay followed the action a little too eagerly.

“Does everything have to be so awkward between us?”

“I’d argue that’s pretty much your fault,” you said casually, but it was the truth.

“I’m sorry.” Jay ran a hand through his hair.

“Stop apologising. It just makes it less genuine the more you do it. The words lose their weight.” You shook your head. “You know that saying about actions speaking louder than words? Maybe try to do that.”

Jay scoffed. “I can’t exactly go around threatening people the way Heeseung does,” he said, and you raised a brow at him.

“Of course not. Because he’s doing that for himself. Not for me,” you replied. “Maybe just try being my friend for once, Jay. An actual friend. We’ll see where that goes.”

Jay pursed his lips, nodding. “Okay…” he said. “I think I can do that.”

“So? Can I leave now?”

“Actually, Y/N, would you like to watch a movie with me?”

“What?”

“I’m bored.” Jay shrugged. “And the house’s gonna be empty for a few more hours.”

“And you don’t think I have plans?”

“Not in that outfit, you don’t,” Jay countered, examining your whole figure once more. But he was right. You would’ve probably watched movies at home by yourself anyway.

“Ugh, sure. Whatever,” you agreed.

“Action?” Jay asked, letting go of your wrist. He approached the TV in his room, looking at you quizzically.

“Yeah, I wanted to re-watch—”

“Captain America?” Jay cut you off, and your eyes widened. He was right. You did want to re-watch the Captain America movies. They were your favourites among the Marvel movies, and you could never get quite enough of Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

Tilting your head to the side, you asked, “How did you know—”

“Just because I pretended to ignore you, it doesn’t mean I didn’t actually listen.” He rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t blame you for thinking that he wouldn’t know anything about you. Though the fact was that he probably knew a little too much for his own good. (Another reason why it angered him that he didn’t know about your bullies.) “And yes, I will put on The Winter Soldier,” he added, controller in hand.

You were speechless. But you didn’t ask this time.

How well did Park Jay actually know you?

So you were now friends with Jay. You and Jake were in a non-committed relationship — a situationship, if you will — and Heeseung was doing whatever it was that he was doing in regards to you. Which meant one very simple thing: people were now looking at you. Really looking at you. 

Which was convenient because your third resolution for the year was to become popular at school. This counted, right? At least among other things, anyway. 

People actually turned whenever you passed by, and while the attention wasn’t what you imagined, you still held your head high and walked forward as if there was nobody but you. One thing had been people’s initial shock over you being back, but now… they were judging again, and perhaps even more harshly than before.

Ugh. You just wanted to get to English class.

“If you let them know that you know they are watching, it’ll just make it worse,” Heeseung whispered in your ear. It startled you, jumping away from the boy who suddenly appeared by your side. 

“What the hell, Heeseung!” you scolded him, slapping his chest with your hand. A lopsided grin decorated his lips, and he knew he looked good at that moment. 

You wondered how many girls were at the receiving end of it before you.

“I’m just offering useful advice.” He shrugged, stepping closer to you. “I also wanted to talk to you, but you seem to avoid me like the plague.”

Your brow rose. “You’re the one still trying to pretend you don’t like me,” you said matter-of-factly, and he made a non-committal sound in response.  “Maybe that’s where you went wrong.”

“Maybe.” Heeseung nodded, shoving his hands into the pockets of his trousers. 

“What do you want?”

Humming, Heeseung smirked at you again. “Just wondering if you and Jake are exclusive and all that.”

“Why don’t you ask him?” You deadpanned. 

“He talks about you as if you were his girlfriend, I don’t think I have to know his side.” Heeseung clicked his tongue and shook his head. “So I wanna know what you think. Since you two clearly haven’t had that talk yet.”

Stopping in your tracks, you turned to Heeseung and crossed your arms. “We did,” you said. “Literally right after Miss Decelis exposed that mistake I made inside Sunghoon’s car, by the way. If I’d known—”

“You’d still want it,” Heeseung said nonchalantly, laughing. Which sounded a lot like it was aimed at you. To mock you. “Wish we weren’t interrupted…” he mumbled, eyeing you.

“Out of everyone, I think I really hate you the most,” you said, reminiscing of your childhood alongside Heeseung. 

Why were you even trying so hard back then? With Jay, you’d always gotten the smallest snippets of hope whenever he looked slightly surprised and pleased despite trying to pretend he was not. But Heeseung had always been careless. Nothing mattered to him.

Heeseung’s brows furrowed, and he frowned. “No, you don’t,” he said. 

“Yes, I do,” you countered, glaring up at him.

And you hated what followed afterward even more, with Heeseung invading your personal space to claim your lips for himself. You hated the way your body reacted automatically, responding with just as much heat, your kisses matching his own.

You hated the way your hands roamed his broad shoulders until you had your fingers tangled in his hair, bringing him even closer to you. 

You hated the way your whole body sought him out, heart beating in your ears. The way you arched in an attempt to be pressed flat against his body, feeling the growing bulge between his legs on your stomach. Heeseung groaned into your mouth, and you swallowed the delicious sound, rubbing your thighs together. 

And then the spell was broken when the bell rang. 

People had been watching, and you realised that you were royally fucked.

Good morning, Decelis!

I’d like to say that Lee Heeseung might finally be marking his territory but… I fear a little birdie has told me that our lovely Y/N is going to the annual Sim Jake praising event with Park Jay.

It seems that our childhood friends have finally become… friends?

XO, Miss Decelis

Heeseung wanted to be pleased about what happened between you and him. He especially loved the way you squirmed under his gaze after the two of you made your way inside the English classroom, and Jake was right there. 

But they were featured on Miss Decelis the next morning, and he realised that maybe it wasn’t such a good idea with all the replies underneath the post.

He knew he shouldn’t care. He never cared before anyway. But this was you. And he couldn’t get past the nasty comments that called you an attention whore because you were taking advantage of everyone feeling sorry for you.

He hoped you didn’t read any of it. But he also knew you were basically a walking and talking Miss Decelis encyclopaedia.

Not the greatest way to start off the day of Jake’s birthday event. Especially knowing that your date was going to be Jay.

Jay.

They really were the most pathetic guys on the block. All it took was not seeing you or hearing from you the whole summer, and suddenly they both missed you and neither actually disliked you.

Jake loved any kind of attention, and you gave him plenty. It was enough for all three of them to suddenly become a whole mess of losers for you.

Maybe if Heeseung had Sunghoon’s resolve and simply didn’t talk to you, he’d be doing far better. But something told him that Sunghoon’s case was just a matter of time.

All these thoughts were going through the boy’s head as he stared at himself in the mirror, overthinking his outfit. It was simple, a suit tailored just for him without a tie. But perhaps it was too simple.

Jay and Jake were absolutely going to wear something in an attempt to impress you, and Heeseung was only lucky that Sunghoon couldn’t afford doing so. Unless his suit was going to come from your father’s pocket as another donation to the up-and-coming figure skating champion. 

Not even his Prada cologne felt like enough when he knew how excessive Jay’s collection was, and how he always had a specific scent for each event, and how good his colognes actually were. 

Why was he even overthinking this stupid event? It never mattered to him that you were in attendance. Because you would always try to approach him to at least say hi and start any kind of conversation. Which he would cut off very early on. Your dejected pout gave Heeseung a twisted sense of accomplishment whenever he watched you leave. But the reason behind why changed over the years.

At first, he just liked watching you suffer because he, as a very young idiotic kid, thought you were making him suffer. But then, when he was old enough, he kept thinking — and refusing to acknowledge that those were his thoughts in the first place — if you would have that exact same pout during sex when he’d forbid you from cumming. 

Heeseung groaned when he felt his cock harden, and he hated that the mere thought of you did that to him. Especially when you were fucking Jake… of all of them, you chose Jake. 

Running a hand through his hair, Heeseung bit his lower lip. What was he supposed to do about you? Because somehow, you made him feel clueless, and he’d never felt that before. 

“I’m not gonna ask.” 

Heeseung startled when his cousin entered his bedroom without knocking. 

Jeonghyeon looked Heeseung in the eyes through the mirror instead of laying his gaze literally anywhere else, intently holding the eye contact.

“The fuck you want?” Heeseung said indignantly, walking away from the mirror, hiding his boner out of his cousin’s sight. 

“We’re heading out,” Jeonghyeon replied nonchalantly. “But I also wanted to talk to you for a bit,” he added, keeping Heeseung stuck in place, although he couldn’t exactly go quite yet, either. 

“What now?” Heeseung rolled his eyes. 

“Stay away from Y/N,” Jeonghyeon spoke plainly, straight to the point. He did not want you to get hurt, and knowing Heeseung, exactly that was going to happen. 

Heeseung scoffed, licking his lips. “Funny. But no, thanks. You’re not my mother.”

“No, but I’m your cousin. And I’m Y/N’a best friend. The last thing she needs is your pathetic little ass to hurt her more than you already did in the past… So stay the fuck away.”

“I’m guessing neither Jay or Jake got this cute speech of yours?” Heeseung’s brow rose. 

“They don’t need it. Jake was always good to Y/N, and I talked to Jay. He, unlike you, is actually sorry and wants to make shit up to her… and, oh, did I mention he’s not trying to get in her pants?”

“Boo-hoo, if you really think that, then you know jackshit about Jay.”

“All I need to know is that he’s better than you,” said Jeonghyeon. 

Heeseung’s jaw clenched, and he clicked his tongue. “Was that necessary?”

“Very.” Jeonghyeon nodded. “At least Jake and Jay know what it means to care. Maybe once you acquire that skill, we can have this talk again. But until then, just stay away.”

“Jeonghyeon!” Your voice carried through the corridor as you called after Heeseung’s cousin. “Where are you guys, we’re about to leave without both of you dumbasses.” You approached Jeonghyeon, peering through the door into Heeseung’s room.

A very plain room at that. Just like his outfit. Its main attractions were the bed, the gaming setup and his showcased collection of mechanical keyboards — which he had put together himself (!) with his own hands. But that still left a large empty space in the middle of the room. Jake and Sunghoon had joked about being able to play Twister in it way too many times by now. 

You, on the other hand, were the exact opposite of plain. Your dress was gold, glittery and tight, hugging your curves and stopping at your mid-thighs. Last year, he would’ve made a remark about you looking like a golden disco ball, but he dared not say anything now. Last year, you wouldn’t even fight him on it and simply glare; but this year, you looked like you would have no issue coming up to him and slapping him for being rude. 

Not to mention this year, Heeseung wasn’t afraid to admit that he would love to tear that dress off you. He craved feeling your heated skin under his touch again, and you being within reach so often did not make it any easier for him. 

“Heeseung has a bit of a problem right now, so I think he’ll take a while,” said Jeonghyeon, smirking when he saw the mortified expression on Heeseung’s face. “You and Jay can probably go ahead anyway. Is he taking you in his car?”

“Yeah.” You smiled softly. Because, yeah — that’s fucking right — you and Jay were now friends. Heeseung had to hold in the annoyed groan.

But at least this reminder served like a nice, ice cold bucket of water being poured over him, dealing with the little problem in his crotch area. 

He was ready to go. 

“I’ll see you guys at Jake’s.” You grinned with a small adorable wave aimed at — strangely enough — both him and Jeonhyeon. 

Except, unlike Heeseung, Jeonghyeon received a kiss on the cheek which you had to lift yourself up on your tiptoes for and he had to slightly bend down in the knees. 

Then you were gone with a wink. 

“Stop glaring at me, dickhead,” Jeonghyeon said. “She tried to be your friend. It’s not my fault you’re stupid.”

This time, Heeseung let out the indignant and frustrated groan that had been building. He ran a hand over his face. 

“Let’s just go.”

Sim Jake did not hate his birthday per se, but it was fair to say he wasn’t fond of it. Well, he would be if he was allowed to simply spend the day with his friends, but that wasn’t possible with his parents.

They didn’t care that all Jake really wanted to do was to be stuck by your side, maybe steal a kiss or two, and call that his best birthday ever. His parents needed to have a whole house party to show everyone — over and over again — the photos and diplomas and medals that Jake had acquired through his 18 years of living. Maybe if it hadn’t come to him so naturally, his parents wouldn’t be so adamant at showing him and his achievements off. But here he was. 

Watching his parents and staff run around the house as the last finishing touches were being done for the first guests to arrive. 

Jake was stuffed in a dark blue tailored suit his parents forced him into getting done, the material tight and soft on his skin. He hated how stuffed it made him feel, especially with everything going on around him. 

He was just excited to see you again. As if he hadn’t texted you minutes ago or saw you yesterday. It was something he realised recently — that he sought you out wherever he went. Jake would always sport the largest grin in your presence, loving to make you smile. Your laugh was a virus he kept catching, and he lived for those moments when he would tease you and you’d scrunch your nose and lightly hit his chest or shoulder. 

To him, it wasn’t just about those intimate moments he shared with you, but also your friendship and how much he’d grown to like you over the past few months. It was different when he barely knew you and the two of you acknowledged each other from time to time. This was about your shared love for superhero movies and the way you laughed softly and cooed whenever you saw Jake’s enormous Lego collection, saying it made you like him even more. 

He wanted to make you love him, but it seemed that the exact opposite happened instead.

So it wasn’t wrong of him to feel a bit upset, if not jealous, about you coming to his birthday event with Jay, right? (He tried to pretend nothing ever happened between you and Heeseung these days, too.)

Running a hand through his hair, Jake made his way to the foyer where he would be tasked with greeting all the guests. It was about time for the event to start, and the first ring of the bell signalled just that.

Jake sighed, opening the door.

“Hi! Happy birthday!” you greeted the boy enthusiastically, wrapping your arms around his neck. And then you pulled away and left a big wet kiss on his cheek, which left a faint pink print of your lips from your lip gloss. “This is the first time I’m here this early,” you remarked with a smile, gazing at Jake. 

“Hey, man.” Jay’s hug was less warm and he patted Jake’s shoulder. A bright contrast to your crushing embrace.

“Hi.” Jake smiled at both of you, nodding. “You’re the first one’s here, so feel free to go wild at the buffet while everything’s stacked.”

“Will do!” you said, saluting. “Will probably need it to survive the day anyway. Just remind me I have a big gift for you, Jake.”

Jay deadpanned, glancing at you. “What? Are you letting him fuck your ass or something?”

“Pervert?” you said, hitting Jay’s chest. But there was a light-hearted smile on your lips. “You’re just jealous.”

“Am I? I didn’t notice,” Jay replied. But it was a big fat lie. Jake saw Jay’s ears redden with the lie, and he wasn’t sure how to feel about that knowledge. Should he be surprised? Probably not. 

Of course, he wanted you. He’d be stupid not to. Fucking MILFs was never going to last anyway. Not when you were right here, and you were perfect. Then there was Heeseung. And Jake saw the photos from yesterday.

Heeseung and Jake had shared too many girls to count by now, but with you, he wanted to be selfish. He would’ve preferred to have you all to himself, but he was scared of making the next step. What if you rejected him because you didn’t want a real relationship? Was he even ready for a relationship?

He never was in one to begin with. Neither of them have. Never had they before become serious with a girl. It had always been casual fucks, usually not more than once with the same girl except for some special cases; and now there was you. For Jake, at least, there was you.

How was he supposed to act around a girl who made him inexplicably happy?

“Find me if you’re bored, Jakey. I’ll be around with Jay, I guess.” You glanced at the slightly taller boy with feigned annoyance, and Jay rolled his eyes.

“You could’ve just said no.”

“But that’s no fun.” You grinned. 

Fuck, Jake was down bad for you.

You were true to your word and stuck around Jay even when your friends arrived. It was almost as if you could sense his discomfort when he wasn’t with his group of friends. You were always quick to take hold of a conversation whenever someone approached you, usually to speak to you about what had happened. That was when Jay would step in and keep you from reliving your past memories because unlike with him, you couldn’t exactly tell these strangers to shut up.

The least he could do was be short with those people for you. Because despite everything, you were still trying to keep the perfect image around your parents’ associates. At school, nothing mattered anymore, but at events like these? They all had to pretend to be the pliant little dolls raised by their successful parents.

But it was hard to even be here. For Jay, at least, since all he could think about when he saw you in your dress was what it would look like on the ground — which he was really disgusted with himself for, by the way. He just managed to establish a solid friendship with you, and all he could think of was whether the moans you made whenever you tasted something really good would be the same when he tasted your pussy.

God, he needed to get it together.

You were hooking up with Jake. And the three — no, four — of them promised each other they would not try to sleep with the same girl nearly half a year ago. It was part of their history that neither was very proud of, and Miss Decelis had a feast of the four of them once it was found out. But realistically, it wasn’t their fault that the girl couldn’t keep up with all of them.

Maybe you could.

You snapped your fingers in Jay’s face with your eyes narrowed at the boy in disapproval. “Could you not undress me with your eyes in public? It’s inappropriate as hell, and if you haven’t forgotten, it’s Jake’s birthday.”

“Why don’t you go to him and suck him off if you care so much?” Jay retorted, internally cringing at himself. Why would he even suggest that? You might actually do it, and he was not—

“You’re right, I should,” you hummed. Licking your lips, your eyes easily found Jake in the crowd with his parents, speaking to an elderly pair that kept touching Jake’s hair and cheeks and shoulders with large smiles while he looked mildly uncomfortable. “He looks like he needs saving. And a break.”

“Y/N, I wasn’t serious.” Jay ran a hand through his hair, and you tilted your head to the side.

“Does it matter? Jokes aside, today is Jake’s birthday, and he deserves to enjoy at least a tiny bit of this bullshit event before we all get lost,” you said, nodding to yourself as confirmation of your own logic. And Jay couldn’t claim you were wrong because he knew better than anyone how much Jake hated this annual event.

“You’re right, but, Y/N—”

“Can you look after my phone?” You handed the device that had been practically stuck in your hand since you arrived over to Jay. “I’ll find you later. Pretty sure I could find you anywhere just by the smell. It’s actually really good,” you said with a smile, and Jay wanted to be proud of picking the right cologne, but once he accepted your phone, you were already halfway through the room to approach Jake.

Jake was one hell of a lucky bastard.

Jay sighed, ready to put your phone away in his pocket when it lit up with a new notification. Which would be nothing special had he not seen the user above the Twitter notification. A new message from a random user meant for the eyes of everyone once it got relayed.

It was a DM for Miss Decelis.

“You’ve got to be fucking joking.”

“Was that my birthday gift?” Jake stared at you through dazed eyes, his voice breathless. He sat at the edge of his bed while you got up from your spot on the floor to nestle on his lap, his cock still hard and covered in saliva.

“That would be a terrible birthday gift,” you replied, moaning when you felt Jake’s hardness against your clothed cunt. Jake adjusted his hips, forcing another whimper out of you, and you cupped his cheeks to make him look in your eyes. “Stop moving, Jake, or we’ll never leave this bedroom,” you breathed out, and he just lazily grinned at you in response.

“Maybe I don’t want to leave,” he replied, wrapping his arms around your waist and bringing you closer. “Oh fuck, I want to feel you now,” he groaned, restraining himself from doing anything else for you.

“It’s not— oh— the time yet,” you whispered, barely thinking coherent thoughts with Jake’s dick between your legs, though not the way the two of you wanted it to be. “Later, you can get anything you want, Jakey.”

“Anything?” he repeated, biting his lip. One of his hands slipped underneath your dress, his digits sneaking their way inside your panties.  

“Mhmm,” you hummed, pleasure striking your whole body as Jake’s fingers began circling your clit. Your lips attached to Jake’s while he worked his magic on you, but he pulled away, biting at your lower lip.

“I want words, baby. A weak hum is not a yes,” he said, his movements becoming harsher and faster.

“Fuck, Jake, yes,” you cried out, your orgasm coming quickly. It was weak, but there wasn’t much to expect from just his fingers atop your clit. But you didn’t want to give yourself to him just yet. It wasn’t time, as you said. Not this early in the evening. He still had guests to please and parents to appease.

“I want to take this dress off you so bad,” Jake mumbled against your shoulder, his lips trailing to your clavicle. 

“Later.” You smiled when his mouth made it back to yours, hands tangled in his blonde locks at the back of his head. 

“I hate that word,” Jake whispered. “But thank you anyway,” he added, finally coming to peace with the fact that this moment had to end because you were right, and his parents were waiting for him.

You smiled, getting off his lap to stand. Adjusting your dress back to its place, you gazed at Jake and his still hard cock. “I’ll leave first. Give you time to recover,” you teased, pointing at his crotch. “Always remember you’re pretty, and that everyone is here to talk your ego all the way up to heaven.”

Bending down, you connected your lips with Jake’s one last time before heading toward the door. “Maybe later we can ditch your afterparty and just go to my house. While my parents are stuck here with yours.”

Jake chuckled, capturing his bottom lip between his teeth as he tended to do out of habit rather than to purposely flirt. “I don’t think the others will let us do that,” he said and shook his head. 

You groaned, your hand on the handle. “Well, we’ll see about that.” With a grin you disappeared out of Jake’s view, leaving him alone in his bedroom while you barely made a step into the corridor when someone grabbed you roughly by the wrist.

“We need to talk.” Jay’s tone was curt as he dragged you by the arm into the nearest guest bedroom.

He locked the door behind the both of you, clutching your phone in hand as he loomed over your figure with a scathing glare. It occurred to you that you completely forgot to turn your notifications off.

You were used to being alone at these events, always stuck to your phone, so you didn’t need to turn them off unless you were at school and around friends. But you gave your phone to Jay without a second thought. Without thinking about what he could see.

“It’s you,” he spat, holding the phone up to your face. 

He lit it up with a touch, opening the string of new notifications, each filled with texts and photos from anonymous sources, feeding you with hourly gossip about Decelis Academy students.

But before the mortification set in, you wondered why it was Jay who was mad at you. Because the whole reason behind you becoming Miss Decelis was because of how he and Heeseung treated you. It was your tiny payback, merely making sure nobody could suspect you for focusing on just a specific group of people. 

“Why?” Jay asked, stepping closer to you, invading your personal space. You tried to back away, but the moment your body hit the cool wooden door, there was nowhere to run.

And Jay was right in your face. 

“Yeah, why?” you questioned back, narrowing your eyes at him. “Why would I start an anonymous gossip blog in freshman year when I was sure everyone hated me?” 

Instead, you leaned in, pushing the phone out of your face. Perhaps you should’ve cared more about Jay dropping it on the ground, but if he was angry, then you were furious. Clenching your jaw, you met Jay’s gaze with fire blazing behind your eyes. 

“Why would I make something that tried to humble you and the rest of the guys when all I’ve ever gotten from you was your dismissal? And ‘cause of what? Because I wasn’t pretty enough for your standards? Because I was annoying? Because I liked you and you were disgusted by it?”

The last sentence wasn’t supposed to ever be spoken out loud, but when you were fifteen, it was one of your biggest insecurities. You liked Jay, and he wanted nothing to do with you, no matter how hard you tried to be his friend. And with the girls who set out to make your life a living hell, of course you thought that the reason behind Jay’s dislike for you was your looks and your awkwardness and the fact he was disgusted by you.

Miss Decelis wasn’t just a way to shoot some of the popular people down a peg. It was also created as your way of venting all of your biggest insecurities by speaking them aloud as Miss Decelis. In a strange way, it was your way of coping with your life. 

 Jay’s eyes widened, looking like you struck him in the face.

When he spoke next, it was like you never said anything. Like he didn’t just discover your secret second identity. All he could hear was your angry confession about liking him. 

“Why?” he asked again, but this time, it wasn’t about Miss Decelis. “Why did you like me?”

“That’s not the point,” you sighed and moved away. You wanted to escape, but Jay’s arms shot up, trapping you by the door on each side. “Jay—”

“Why, Y/N?” he asked again. In eighteen years, he had received many confessions of fancy. But it was always through cutesy letters in his locker or notes passed in class, unless they were brave enough to approach him and try to flirt with him. But those girls never had a proper reason to like him. 

“Because I’m not blind!” you exclaimed in exasperation, trying to push against Jay’s chest. He caught your arms by the wrists to keep you in place. Locking his eyes on you, he refused to let go until he had his answer. 

“You hated me,” you said defeatedly, hands going limp as you acknowledged that you were not strong enough to fight Jay. “But I saw the way you cared for other people. And sometimes me, whenever our parents were around. You would always look out for Heeseung and Jake when they messed around the pool when we were kids. And then you started helping the parents with barbecues and you always made sure that Heeseung and Jake got the biggest portions because they love samgyeopsal. You even cooked ramyun for them whenever our parents refused to make more because they already had five whole packs together.” You paused, remembering your childhood, when life was a little bit easier. “And I really liked listening to you playing guitar. It always fascinated me how good you were. And the adoration you had for the instrument. That’s why—”

“You gave me the pick,” Jay finished for you, and you nodded.

“That’s why I gave you the pick.”

“I always thought you were too perfect to be true,” Jay chuckled, shaking his head. “But you’re probably the stupidest person I’ve ever met.”

You narrowed your eyes at him in a silent question. 

“Because you liked me despite the way I treated you. No sane person would do that.” 

“When have I given you the impression that I’m sane?” Your brow rose challengingly, but instead of replying, Jay cupped your cheeks, bringing your mouth to his as if he didn’t know that you just gave his best friend a blowjob. 

Jay had gone insane.

He sought you out after finding out you were Miss Decelis to be angry with you. To confront you. You were the one shit-talking him on the blog for the past few months, and he was supposed to tear you a new one.

What he wasn’t supposed to do was kiss you when he literally found you leaving Jake’s room.

What he wasn’t supposed to do was let you wrap your legs around his hips while he secured your body with his hands on your ass, carrying you over to the bed inside the guest room he locked the two of you in.

He wasn’t supposed to do many things, yet here he was.

Going insane because of you.

“I never hated you,” Jay whispered against your skin as his lips moved from your mouth to your cheek, your jaw, your neck and lower, still. “What I hated was the stupid act you put up,” he said, not hesitating to unzip your dress. 

“It was a dumb act,” you agreed with a hum that turned into a moan when Jay’s mouth found your nipple, working quickly at getting your clothes off. Not that it was hard when all you wore was the golden dress and lace panties. You ran your fingers through Jay’s hair as he continued his assault on your skin, constantly moving lower while he slipped the dress off you alongside your drenched panties. 

You smelled heavenly. Jay didn’t even care that some of it was likely residue of your moment with Jake. You were with him now, and clearly wanted him as much as he did you. 

What could he do with you, but have you in ways he couldn’t dream of before?

Jay gripped your thighs, pulling them apart as he took a proper look at your beautiful pussy. He licked his lips, and when your head rose to glance at him, your eyes were drunk with lust. “You want me to taste you?” he asked. 

“Yes,” you replied instantaneously, nodding your head like a madwoman. “Please, Jay,” you whispered, your hands reaching for him. 

Jay smirked, positioning you at the edge of the bed so he could have the best access possible from his spot by the bed, his hooded eyes drunk on the sight of you. Naked and defenceless and so perfect, not like when you pretended, but actually perfect — with all your imperfections. 

You were a petty little creature. You created a whole blog just to shit-talk Jay, Heeseung and others because they were making your life more difficult than it needed to be. 

“I don’t know if you deserve it.” He watched you squirm as you looked up at him through your lashes, your lips twisting into an adorable furious pout. 

“After everything you put me through, this is the least I deserve,” you mumbled, glaring at him. But you reminded him of those cute angry kitty memes more than anything else, and he smirked. 

Jay hummed, leaning in to kiss your pretty lips, his tongue swiping across your clit. It elicited a beautiful sound out of your mouth. A moan worthy of his neverending devotion. But he couldn’t give you everything so easily. 

Your gasp reverberated through the room when Jay bit down on your clit, and your hands shot up into his hair to pull at it in an attempt to get him away. But he wasn’t letting go.

“Jay, holy shit.” You bit down on your bottom lip to keep yourself from screaming, letting the twisted pleasure warm your tummy. Brain going hazy, you could barely fight him. 

Not when he kept switching between licking your clit and lapping up all your wetness, and then biting again as if he was a vampire trying to feed. Your pussy sucked Jay’s tongue right in, and your orgasm was inevitable the longer it went on.

“You’re so fucking delicious,” Jay mumbled, staring up at you and your arched back. He had to work to keep your legs apart so you wouldn’t squish his head between your thighs. But at least his regular gym visits with Sunghoon were worth something. 

“Jay, I’m—” you whimpered, unable to finish your sentence when Jay thrusted his tongue as deep inside you as he could, your pussy vibrating with the pleased hum he let out. 

“So good for me,” he said. “You’ll feel amazing on my dick,” he claimed, sporting a huge tent in his trousers, humping air in a feeble attempt to bring some pleasure for himself. But your sounds alone could probably make him cum. 

“Jay!” you exclaimed one last time when ecstasy shot through you, and you tugged at Jay’s hair with enough strength to pull some out. He continued to eat you out as you rode your high off, drinking every bit of your release as if it was a drug, and he was an addict that could not get enough.

Before you even recovered, Jay was already up on his feet, speedily taking his clothes off. His jacket, shirt, tie, trousers. All pieces of clothing disappeared within a blink of your eyes, and then all you could see was Jay’s pulsating cock with precum leaking from the head. 

You brought out an incredibly needy part of Jay out of him, and it made you even hotter, more beautiful to him. Jay lifted you once more to adjust your positions on the bed to fit the both of you while he crawled over you, lust-filled eyes meeting yours.

“Tell me what you want, darling, and I’ll take care of you,” he said, and you closed your eyes to drink the moment in.

“I want you,” was all you said in response. 

Just him. 

That was all you needed. 

Park Jay. The boy you had liked when you were younger. 

So you connected your lips, tasting yourself on Jay’s tongue. He groaned when his cock made contact with your stomach, and your hands roamed his body until you reached his hard cock. Your thumb swiped across the head, drawing a moan out of Jay, and you smirked against his lips, guiding him toward your entrance.

“This is all I want,” you said again, teasing yourself with his cock, his eyes already half closed at the tiniest bolts of pleasure. 

So when Jay finally thrusted inside of you, rougher than he should’ve, you whimpered while his lips captured yours again, letting you adjust to his size. You were so warm and so wet, ready just for him. 

He closed his eyes, testing how comfortable you were as he moved his hips the slightest bit. You moaned, back arching to let him go even deeper, to find the spot that would drive you over the edge. And he complied, pulling out slightly before going in again, deeper. He groaned when your walls clenched around him. 

“So perfect,” he mumbled, letting you cling to him like your whole life depended on it.

“Jay,” you whined, “I need you to move faster.”

He smirked. But your word was his command, complying mindlessly. Jay began moving, picking up his pace gradually until all that could be heard inside the bedroom were the skin-on-skin contact, the squelching sound of your wetness, your moans, and Jay’s pants. 

He was drunk on you, not thinking of anything else but the need to pleasure you. To give you the best sex of your life. To ruin you.

“Jay, I’m s-so close,” you managed between laboured breaths, reaching for his lips with yours. It made him go even faster, chasing his own release. “Jay, Jay, Jay!” you screamed, your whole body convulsing with the orgasm that nearly blinded you.

It was the loveliest sound Jay had ever heard, and he almost forgot to pull out as he stared at your spent figure underneath him. But he did, his hand already working on finishing the job as he pulled away from you.

But you didn’t like that. You lifted yourself up on your elbows and then went to your knees, putting your hand over Jay’s. 

“Let me,” you said, licking your lips.

It was confusion that kept Jay from stopping you as you guided his hand away. And then your lips were making contact with the head of his cock. Only a little peck at first. Then your mouth wrapped around it, and before he could even process anything else, you had his dick as deep inside your throat as possible, using your hand to take care of whatever didn’t fit. 

Jay lasted what felt like five seconds before he cummed inside of your mouth as you stared up at him with an innocent glint in your eye. 

He blamed it on the shock of you giving him a blowjob out of your own volition. And in this case, whatever you and Jake were doing, Jay was grateful for all that Jake must’ve taught you.

You swallowed his load, eyes never leaving his, and the two of you collapsed on the bed together, spent but willing to go a second time. 

“So, you’re Miss Decelis.” Jay laughed at the fact. You were never actually perfect. You just hid the other side of you behind an anonymous profile. 

“Are you going to tell anyone?” you asked, turning to lie on your side and stare at Jay’s side-profile. It always fascinated you. He was gorgeous, and his jawline was unreal. 

“Are you going to keep calling me boring?” he turned to face you, brow raised. 

“Maybe if you hook up with another MILF, I’ll stop,” you joked, but Jay deadpanned, pressing his lips in a thin line. 

“You do realise we just had sex, right?” Jay said matter-of-factly, and you hummed. 

“Is it any different to your other casual hook-ups?” you asked nonchalantly, and Jay hated how constricted his chest felt at your words. 

You were probably right. It shouldn’t be any different. But it was. He wanted this again. He wanted you again. And it dawned on him that he had lost his chance years ago. You said it yourself: you used to like him. 

And when the afterparty with just you, your friends and the guys came around, Jay had to watch you be wrapped all around Jake again.

Because, yeah… it was his birthday.

tags: @strxwbloody @starsenha @mitmit01 @chaconadine @in-somnias-world @tmtxtf @missychief1404

[wasteland-wrecker]

ily..... sorry if you've ever answered this but have you ever drawn modern au gage and toby? or do you have hcs?

Hey there! <3

I’m not a big au fan but… here we go! ✨

Thank you for asking, I have this big headcanon:

Gage is not so good in bed. He is probably a virgin, let me explain you why.

🔞🔞🔞

From what we know about his past and the way he talks I'm pretty sure he's never had s3x with anyone or at least no long-term, positive experience.

Lines like "…you wouldn’t want nothin to do with me, not with the fucked up life I’ve had” denotes he is AWARE of the cruelty of the world he lives in. He has seen shit his whole life. I don’t think he had the time to even think about s3x.

Or “I ain’t never done anything like this. Ain’t sure it’d work, you know?”

When you ask him about your relationship he says “… I don’t like talking about feelings and shit. We’re… we’re great, you know that”. Zero experience, come on.

This means he gets embarrassed and that he’s worried about other people’s opinions (which is quite strange for a wastelander and a raider) one of his lines is like “if I die killed by a bug, tell everyone I accidentally stomped on my gun and killed myself”. (Yeah, who cares???)

And, speaking of raiders, he’s lived his whole life as one of them and when he talks to you (a complete stranger!!) in private he calls them “fucking raiders” (you okay man?! Need to talk or something?!).

It seems clear that none of these raiders have ever made its way into his sensitive little heart. He’s faking, pretending to be something he’s truly not.

And I don’t think he’s ever had anything to do with settlers. I can’t even imagine him r4ping someone, from that point of view he has a strong integrity (at most he’ll piss on your corpse ✨)

No one has ever made him feel safe, he says that to you when he opens up. Gage must completely trust his partner to have s3x with him/her/them. He must be sure he won’t be betrayed or killed.

And his past makes it clear that he no longer trusts anyone, apart from himself.

I might also add that the fact that he doesn't take baths indicates a sort of disinterest in the subject.

Gage often complains during trips and it means that he worries about stuff (like rads, chems, alcohol, bad smells - yeah he does I can prove it).

Do you think someone so attentive to what surrounds him and the consequences of his actions wouldn’t care about sexual diseases and sleeping with just anyone? I’m sorry but I don't see it.

He surely m4sturbates often, I can agree with that. He has very indecent thoughts as well and he’s horny af. He probably likes it rough, yes. (He loves to read erotic books OF THIS I’M SURE 10000%) But don't come and tell me that he is a S3x Lord Master or something because I have an hard time believing that (surely with a good experience he can become one, but not when you first know him).

Last, but not least, let’s not forget the fact that his name’s GAGE and he wears a fuckin CAGE all the time (to keep people away from him). The end.

Alright uh, my hand slipped on this hc lol, let me know if you want more anon and I’ll answer you in another post 😭 (shorter I promise) or you can read this post

[nemo-in-wonderland]

"I guess it goes to show, does it not? That we've no idea what we've got until we lose it And no amount of love will keep it around If we don't choose it And I don't know what's got its teeth in me But I'm about to bite back in anger No amount of self-sought fury Will bring back the glory of innocence

My, my, those eyes like fire I'm a winged insect, you're a funeral pyre Come now, bite through these wires I'm a waking hell and the gods grow tired Reset my patient violence along both lines of a pathway higher Grow back your sharpest teeth, you know my desire

I have traveled far beyond the path of reason Take me back to Eden Take me back to Eden"

"Take Me Back To Eden" - Sleep Token

You remember how, the other day, I wrote about how Aranea would eventually meet her demise a few centuries after the events of BG3?

Well, you know that with me, angst and fluff go hands in hands, so I wanted to draw the moment Mephisto found Aranea, mere moments before she is to pass. And he knows that she is going to pass, because he already can feel her soul drawn to himself, reaching for him, as part of their contract. So, before this happens, he brought her to the small garden of rocky trees and crystals that he created for her when she joined him in Cania and became his consort.

As for HOW Aranea has met her end, I like to imagine that it was always her desire for revenge that got her, and her inability to let go of grudges just lead her to a poor decision that, eventually, brought to her demise.

Her grudge against the Dream Guardian, who he was, and how he tricked her into taking her late husband form, was something that Aranea NEVER forgot nor forgive. It was something done deliberately, something that brought her excruciating pain (born out of hope and longing) even if her frozen heart was already in Mephisto's hands, and she could never look past it, not even if the Dream Guardian was the reason she didn't become an Illithid.

So, after the events of Baldur's Gate, she would go her way to find him again, with all the intent to make him pay for what he did (I know, I know, the retribution might be disproportionate, but considering that this happened after Aranea spent a whole century reaping souls for Mephisto, her morals are a tad skewed).

So, considering that the reason for Aranea's death is once more connected to the reason why she sought Mephistopheles' help in the first place, I decided to go down the symbolic route, and give her a garment that resembled the one she had the first time she invoked Mephisto, in a sort of cruel irony.

As for who is taunting Mephisto...well.👀👀👀👀 (but gods, I loved drawing Mephisto so pissed, if anything because drawing all sort of strong emotions is truly a treat for me eheheh).

BUT BUT BUT. This is just one outcome, and not even the canonical one! You know how all the characters have different endings in BG3?? Same thing applies to Aranea as well, I promise! THERE IS PLENTY OF AU WHERE SHE IS ALIVE AND WELL, WREAKING CHAOS ALL AROUND THE NINE HELLS (and Faerun as well lolol), and to be honest, my most favourite outcome among them all. I *live* for a trickster immortal fiend, Consort of Mephisto lolol. (plus, while I explore various possibilities, in my brain all my characters are alive forever, lolol)

AND FOR NOW I AM DONE WITH THE ANGST, I PROMISE.

I promise that the next artwork with Aranea and Mephisto will be a JOYOUS one (fluff? SMLUFF? who knows, but it will completely devoid of Angst. Only 100% Pure Smluff of Certified Origin lololol).

WELL, I HOPE YOU WILL LIKE THIS.

--Nemo

[songmingisthighs]

Stupid Lucky Rain

group : xikers

pairing : student!hyunwoo × student!reader

genre : fluff, university!au, strangers to lovers

word count : 10.1 K

note : part of the "Meet Me Under The Cherry Tree event by @cultofdionysusnet

a/n : hyunwoo need to STAHP being a freeloader in my mind like SIR RENT IS DUE I WILL NAWT TOLERATE SQUATTERS @flowerboykun I'm blaming you for enabling me writing for xikers <3 and GHAWD THIS TOOK SO LONG AND I DID NAWT MEANT FOR IT TO BE THIS LONG ???? THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A TIMESTAMP ????? WTF HAPPENED ??????

buy me coffee ?

You never really liked your university. There were a lot of problems with not just the students and the teaching staff but also with the general management of the place and just the thought of it made you so mad honestly. What made you even more pissed was that the school was your choice because you were so drawn to the campus's open concept; the cherry blossom trees in spring, the stone path to each building, and the happy students everywhere. The decision was solely on you because your parents had even suggested that you go to school in another city but you just HAD to go to this school. So really, you have nothing and no one to blame for your shitty experience but yourself.

Days like this one, when nothing seems to be going your way or even just going right generally, truly made you feel so angry at nothing and no one but at the same time at everything and everyone. Thursdays were never your favourite day but since university, it has taken a rather worse turn. Your last class of the day with the WORST professor in your major talked your ears off which made the class run longer than it should and God forbid someone remind him that class was supposed to end AGES ago. So now, you're stuck by the entrance of your building because it was raining and you didn't even think to bring your umbrella. Now you resented the open concept your university had because what even the fuck was anyone thinking.

Whoever romanticize spring rain needs to have their mouths stuffed with wet cherry blossom flowers. Because while it looks so so so pretty, it's still a pain in the ass to deal with.

"You can't help me?" you groaned into the phone. You had hoped your friend who lived in the dorm could come with an umbrella and help you get home but alas you were met with YET ANOTHER disappointing answer. "I'm sorry, we have a dorm meeting in 5 minutes because someone got caught sneaking her sibling in after hours and all of us are getting punished with her," she sighed, obvious that she was disappointed with her own situation. Not wanting to make her feel bad, you assured her that it was fine and even mustering up a goodbye to her before hanging up. After the call ended, however, you couldn't help but slump down the wall nearby and covered your face with your bag to let out a muffled frustrated scream, completely oblivious that someone was listening in and even watching what was going on with you.

Hyunwoo knew you. Well, he knew OF you as you shared a class with his friend, Sumin and while he had yet to have direct interaction with you, he was well aware of general things about you. How you have classes mostly in the same building except for one in the seminar hall that you shared with his other friends, Seeun and Junmin (though he doesn't think they'd realize), how you seemed to have quite some close friends but you seemed to still be well known around campus, and how you seemed to cringe when you're under a tree that you frequent and a breeze decided to interrupt you. But all that knowledge seemed useless because Hyunwoo didn't even know your name. He couldn't tell his friends that he was interested in you (for a lack of better word) because he know that Sumin is (embarrassing) not going to let his interest slide as platonic. So he kept (suffered alone) to himself and just watch you from afar, sometimes getting a chuckle or a grin at your antics. For a lack of better explanation, Hyunwoo considered himself intrigued by you and now that he was able to get a close-up look, he was, for a lack of better words, amused.

Determined to return home as soon as possible, so you can just wash the ick of the day and fall into a deep slumber where you can just fantasize about being a marshmallow (Or a rock, Tinnitus rules), you stood back up in a speed of light, surprising the person who was behind you. "I can do this, I can just run past this itty bitty rain and be home in no time," you mumbled to yourself, huffing and jumping slightly to prepare to take off. "Straight to the bus shelter, it's... Nothing, not that far," your head nodded along your words, starting to feel like you were being filled with positivity, "Yeah, yeah, it's no biggie whatsoever." Hyunwoo was grinning and chuckling to himself, amused at how you were trying to... survive? Does that make sense?

Not letting yourself hesitate much longer, you took off from your spot to face the seemingly worsening rain.

"Wait-,"

It didn't take long for you to slip and skid away several feet and land on a cherry blossom tree. To make your accident more unfortunate, the petals of the cherry blossom tree fell from the tree upon impact and scattered around you dramatically. Seeing this, Hyunwoo panicked and reached into his bag to fish out the umbrella his roommate, Junghoon, had placed for him, taking a moment to stare at the item in embarrassment because he could have gone to you and lent you the umbrella while he was (creepily) staring at you and your antics. Nevertheless, he shook his head and opened his umbrella to shield him before running over to you.

The closer he got, the more he could hear you sobbing whilst still in the same position as when you landed to a stop. Hyunwoo cringed and slowly leaned down so that his umbrella would also cover your face as it did with his. "Excuse me miss, are you okay?" he asked sympathetically, genuinely feeling bad that you had to go through such an embarrassing accident. Thankfully, you answered him, even if it was with an eery sarcastic laugh, "I'm... On top of the world, walking on Sunshine fantastic," you said as you closed your eyes, "And it's... Amazing that you saw me at my worst." Hyunwoo couldn't help but cringe at your words, wanting to be helpful but not quite knowing how to. "Uh... If this is your worst, I'm glad you're pulling it off," he smiled in awkward assurance, hoping that it makes your unfortunate accident perceivably better for you. Thankfully, you chuckled at him even if it was pathetic laughter (because if you hadn't, Hyunwoo might dig himself a 10-foot hole and just stay there until the embarrassment ebbs away.

He was just about to help you up and possibly asked if he could accompany you to wherever you needed to go but he heard his name being called (by a voice that sounded like an impatient Minjae) from the far distance. Afraid that he might get caught with a (cute) girl, Hyunwoo's eyes widened and his head snapped back to you who was beginning to it up. With a heavy heart, Hyunwoo handed you his umbrella and before you could ask him what he was doing, he gave you a charming smile that made your heart skip a beat.

"I hope you get back home safely."

That was all he said before he took his backpack over his head and dashed through the rain. "Wait," you called out, trying your best to stand up quickly, "I didn't get your name!" It was unfortunate that you didn't hear his friend called out for his name due to the heavy rain.

Unfortunately, the sound of the rain was louder than your voice and Hyunwoo was already quite far away. All you could do was stare at his retreating figure in sadness and conviction because how did he not fall and embarrass himself like you did and you hadn't gotten the chance to thank or talk to him. But you were at least safe from being (even more) wet on your journey home.

As you walked away, you couldn't help but look back at the tree where you landed. Usually, it would take you some time to recover from such embarrassment. Heck, you'd be angry at yourself, the tree, the pink petals, the sky, the weather, the grass, the pavement, the university, and maybe even the students that didn't fall like you did. So it surprised you to have walked away with a light heart and even gratitude. All thanks to that mysterious cutie who you didn't even get to look at properly before he ran off. You would've liked to appreciate his beauty first before you both parted. How had you never realized there was anyone as cute as he before? Why did you have to meet him in such an unfortunate circumstance?

You couldn't help but let out a final sigh before resuming your walk to the bus stop, hoping that you'd get to meet the stranger you met under the cherry blossom tree once again.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

"So he just gave you an umbrella... and ran?" you nodded at the question that was asked by one of your friends, Liz.

"And you had never seen him on this campus before?" your other friend, Rei, added and again, you simply nodded at her question.

All three of your friends smacked their foreheads with their palms, absolutely dumbfounded by how you handled the situation. "God, (y/n), how is it that these kinds of things seem to only happen to you?" Your last friend, Haewon, asked in exasperation. You couldn't help but groan and slumped down on the table before you, accidentally bumping your forehead on the hard surface which made Liz cringe. "And there she goes again," she teased, snickering but pushing your head slightly to see the red mark and your scrunched-up face and gently pressing her cold can of cola on the spot, "Dum dum."

Rei rested her chin on her open palm and tilted her head, "So, what are you planning on doing?" she asked. For a moment, all you could do was hum, not knowing what to do because you really do have no plans whatsoever. It had been five days since you saw the cutie who helped you under the cherry blossom tree and you hasn't seen him since and you were sure that you'd recognize him immediately. How can you forget his worried eyes that turned into adorable crescents when he smiled? How can you forget his soft, pastel green cardigan and white shirt that was paired with black jeans and white Adidas that somehow made him look like a model? How can you forget his melodious voice when he talked? And God, how can you forget the fact that he made you feel better without even trying? He was it, he was what you needed to motivate you to go to school and it might be just some dumb crush but you really do want to see him again.

Unbeknownst to you, Haewon had slipped her hand into your bag and taken the umbrella the boy had lent to you and waved it over her head as she rose to her feet slightly. "Is there a cute boy who is missing his umbrella because he lent it to a clumsy fool last week?" she yelled at the whole cafeteria out of the blue which made you yelp and immediately pulled her down just as people snapped their heads towards your table. "Are you nuts!?" you hissed as you hit the side of her arm in a scolding manner. Yet, Haewon only blinked her eyes confusedly at you, "Wha- me? I'm doing your job effectively! Don't you wanna meet this boy and then marry him?" Truly, you wonder how Haewon's mouth has yet to get her in trouble. "Not marry!" you whined at her to which she just rolled her eyes, "Fine, you're against marriage, but you want a future with him, no?" All you could do was groan and run your fingers through your hair, "Rei was more helpful when she couldn't help me with an umbrella last week," you muttered. Liz scrunched her nose at you and she couldn't help but add, "I mean... Had Rei helped you last week, Mr cutie wouldn't have been able to help you," to which you replied with a deadpanned look on your face that made her raise both of her hands slightly, "I'm just stating a fact here, you're mad at Haewon unnie, not me," she grinned sheepishly.

It wasn't like you were mad at your friends or anything because you were mostly mad at yourself for not being able to find the cutie. Granted, you had only seen him once but on a campus with a limited number of students walking around everywhere, statistically speaking, you should've been able to bump into him again in no time. But no time feels like yes time and yes, time sure was being a bitch because it felt like forever. Every day, you try to be more aware of your surroundings, be more aware of the people in case you see the cutie and every day, without fail, you brought the umbrella he lent you in your bag along with a little note of gratitude. In it was the usual thank you for helping your dumb ass and for making your day slightly better and at the bottom right corner, you had written your number for the purpose of "wanting to pay you back for your kindness. So text me when you're available :)" it's cheesy and you blame Liz.

Suddenly, someone approached your table, a guy who looked so innocent and he had the most adorable smile on his face. "Hi, sorry, is the rest of the seat taken?" he asked, tilting his head a little. you were sure that had you known him, you would've absolutely squished his cheeks and given him the biggest hug ever at any given time. "Oh, no, please," Rei gestured for him to take a seat on the space at the end of the table. "Thank you!" he cheerfully said before turning slightly and waving his hands, "Guys, I found a table!" The four of you couldn't help but turn around and watch as six more guys walked through the sea of people towards the direction of the table you were occupying. "Guys, I think we need to leave," Rei said, cringing at the number of people around but also at the thought of them having a hard time finding seats. The rest of you nodded and immediately packed your stuff and took your trays. Seeing this, the guy felt bad, "Oh, you guys don't have to leave!" he pouted, feeling bad because he thought you all left because of him. But Liz waved a hand at him and smiled, "No, don't worry! We need to go to class anyways!" which seemed to reassure him as he simply nodded and bowed slightly, "Thank you so much," he smiled.

Once you and your friends cleared, the guy's four friends soon came to the table just as the four of you left the table, giving the guy you interacted with one last wave (just for fun) which he happily reciprocated. "Yujun, dude, how'd you get them to leave?" Sumin smirked, chuckling slightly while setting his tray down. The other people in the group; Yechan, Junmin, Hunter, Junghoon, and Jinsik followed suit, taking their respective spots. "Probably by telling them something about snail penises," Yechan snickered at his friend whose expression dropped into an unamused one, "How're your books, Yechan, are they balanced?" he retorted back. But of course, Yechan being Yechan, he wasn't affected by his friend's words, he simply sit on his chair and plastered on (an obviously faux) innocent smile, "Better than your genealogy paper I'll bet," thankfully Junmin was there to stop either one of them to start throwing food at each other, only letting Yujun squeak out something about Yechan's response not even making any sense.

It seemed like you really do have rotten luck because not even five minutes after you cleared up, Hyunwoo walked into the cafeteria with two of his friends on his sides. "All I'm saying is," Seeun shrugged his shoulder to readjust his bag so he won't let go of his tray, "The idea that reality is all fake and that the physical world is all caused by ideas is plausible! For instance, what if the things you see around you aren't actually what they seem? What if the things that you see are just how your brain wants to perceive them? Or let's say there's a chair in a room. Who's to say that chair still exists when you leave the room because there was no one to perceive it?" God, Hyunwoo love his friends but sometimes he really does question why they became friends in the first place. The additional three guys soon approached the table you had just occupied, and to poke fun at you and your luck even more, Hyunwoo had chosen to sit on the spot you sat on. "For fuck's sake, Seeun, you took ONE philosophy class last semester. Move on!" Minjae complained, choosing a seat at the far end, near Yechan where he didn't have to deal with Seeun. However, Seeun only scoffed at his older friend, "By that logic, you should forget all your introductory classes because you had only taken those classes once, hyung."

"Hey, Hyunwoo's here!" Jinsik greeted his seemingly quiet friend in an attempt to stop more fights to break and even resume the potential fight between Yechan and Yujun. "How are you today, hyung?" Hunter, who was next to Hyunwoo asked before popping a piece of fish cake from his bowl of tteokbokki into his mouth. "Oooh look at him, isn't it obvious?" Sumin snickered, making Hyunwoo freeze in his spot while his pupils shook nervously, fearing that Sumin might know something, "Hyunwoo is sad because his little mysterious miss scattered-petal-umbrella-borrower hasn't been seen around." Immediately, Hyunwoo's head snapped to Junghoon who felt his friend's glare and he halted his movement just as he was about to take a spoonful of soup. Hyunwoo's eyes narrowed and Junghoon, without dropping his spoon back into his bowl, made a statement for himself, "I didn't know it was a SECRET secret, I thought it was a general knowledge secret."

Confused, Junmin looked between his friends with curiosity, "What? What miss scattered-petal-umbrella-borrower?" he asked, clearly wanting to know what everyone (some, but it didn't include him so he felt left out) was talking about. "Say those five words quickly like a tongue-twister, I dare you," Minjae snickered and soon the table erupted into a tongue-twister challenge battle, allowing Hyunwoo to just sulk in his seat.

It wasn't like he wasn't trying to find you because he absolutely did. He mulled over why he hadn't seen you in a while and made a plan to be able to see you which was basically to just frequent the cherry blossom tree where you fell. To be fair, he had only implemented the plan the day before so his success rate as of now was about the same as seeing a monkey juggling in a baby suit. Not to mention his busy schedule as a Food Technology student was not really allowing him much freedom. Still, he tried. He tried by studying under the tree, right on the spot you landed on and made sure to pass the tree when he got to the campus and when he was about to leave. But so far he hadn't had his luck meeting you again. The effort Hyunwoo put to present himself also doubled because he wanted to look nice for you. His usual fluff of hair was styled better (courtesy of Sumin) and his clothes were nicer (courtesy of Minjae), heck, he even found a new sense of confidence (courtesy of Yechan who said that they're one Christmas away from buying him a loom and call him the loonie roomie with a loomy).

"Hey, hey, hey, let's go back to talking about Hyunwoo," Minjae chuckled after seeing Sumin choke on his own spit. Yujun glanced at the oldest, blinking twice in confusion before stating, "Well, to be fair, we all got sidetracked because of you, hyung," Minjae's left eye twitch at the guy who was innocently nibbling on a piece of chicken on his fork but he managed a (forced) wide grin, "Well, I'm refocusing back to Hyunwoo," he said simply. Hearing this, Hyunwoo sat up straight and shrugged slightly, "I don't think there's much to tell, you know? It's just... Someone that I wished to have more interactions with," though he wanted to appear casual or even nonchalant, the slight pout on the corners of his lips betrayed him.

"Okay, now I'm confused," Sumin said, raising an eyebrow at his friend, "I've introduced you to a lot of people on this campus and you didn't seem to be interested in anyone. Who changed your mind??" "God, Sumin hyung, isn't it possible that Hyunwoo hyung is interested in someone who has NOTHING to do with you?" Hunter scoffed. The rest of the table was nodding at Hunter's words, agreeing with him. But it wasn't until Yujun turned to Hyunwoo that he realized Hyunwoo's ears, despite his face remaining a neutral colour, were bright red and seemingly hot if one was to touch them. Yujun's eyes widened and he squeaked, finger immediately pointing to his older friend who realized and whose eyes widened to saucers, "OH MY GOD, HYUNWOO HYUNG LIKES SOMEONE HE KNEW FROM SUMIN HYUNG!" he exclaimed loudly.

To avoid bombarding, Hyunwoo immediately packed his stuff and took his tray, "I don't have time for this," was the last thing he said before he ran off, leaving his friends complaining and booing at him.

On his way out to his next class, after putting his tray to where it was supposed to go, Hyunwoo slumped on a nearby wall and hung his head. It was embarrassing that he couldn't control his reaction and because of that, people now know that he was INTERESTED (not yet crushing) on someone that Sumin also knows. "God, my life is a joke," he muttered to himself before crouching down to tie his shoelaces that had become loose.

To mock his existence, just as his focus was on his feet, you ran right past him back into the cafeteria. You looked around and spotted the table you sat on before. As you rushed back to the table, Yujun looked up and beamed when he recognized you. "Oh! It's miss nice table sharer!" he exclaimed, causing people on the table to snap their heads at you, curious at what Yujun was talking about. You were stunned to be greeted like that, as evident by your rounded, blinking eyes, but you smiled at him, "Hi? And it's (y/n) if you wanna thank me more for giving you my table," you joked. Sumin swallowed the food he was chewing and nudged you on the hip gently, "Hey (y/n), what's up?" While you both were not really that close (even with the class you shared), you both were fond of each other and you knew that Sumin has a playful and friendly persona which was why everyone was comfortable enough to joke and poke with him. You pouted at him, "I think I left my wallet here by accident. If it's not here, then it must've fallen out when I was walking around and I might as well say goodbye to it," you sighed. The guys on the table were nice enough to immediately look around and even down under the table to help you locate your missing item. All but one. Junghoon quietly lifted your slightly tattered wallet up with a blank look on his face, "I didn't realize this was yours," he simply said. Minjae exhaled sharply and reached to pluck the item from his friend's grasp, "You're not supposed to take things that aren't yours, Junghoon!" he then handed you the item with a sheepish (almost embarrassed) look on his face, "Sorry about him, he can be peculiar." Junghoon scoffed and crossed his arms at Minjae's words, obviously dissatisfied, "Hey, at least I noticed the item before Hyunwoo hyung placed his tray on it."

Simply relieved, you hugged your wallet to your chest happily. "God, thank you for keeping it safe!" then you pat Sumin's head like how you would a puppy and lean down slightly to match his eye level, "I'll see you tomorrow at class, okay?" to which Sumin replied with his fingers that are supposed to indicate him saying 'okay' as his mouth was busy chewing. With the reply, you (once again) take your leave with a wave of goodbye and an extra enthusiastic one to Yujun who enthusiastically double-waved at you.

Once you were out of earshot, Yujun spoke up, "She's nice! How'd you know her, Sumin hyung?" "I knew her from my mandatory English class, she helps me a lot with essays but that's about it," the whole table nodded in understanding at that. But then they snapped their heads all at the same time at the sound of Seeun snickering. "What if that's the girl Hyunwoo hyung has a crush on?" Jinsik rolled his eyes and punched him lightly on the shoulder, "Pay attention dude, do you think Sumin would just use the people he knew from class as a potential match for Hyunwoo?" Seeun raised an eyebrow at his older friend challengingly, knowing full well what his defence would be, "There are endless possibilities of worlds. If you can think of it then it can exist in theory therefore anything is possible. However, nothing can exist without it being perceived by someone." And for the first time ever (since the second week of his taking his philosophy class), his response was met with nods of approval and even understanding.

"Hence, my earlier statement that things might just simply exist because there is someone to perceive them. Like the chair," as soon as those nods come, they were immediately replaced with groans and protests. Jinsik, Yechan, and Junghoon even threw their juice boxes at him.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

In the next three days, there were more close run-ins that happened between you and Hyunwoo that if you both realized would've caused your heads to explode.

The first occurrence was the day after the almost run-in at the cafeteria. You were paired with Sumin for a class discussion, even spending time making a report in class. It was a complete fluke (and by that, it was most likely orchestrated by destiny) that you were paired together because neither of you had ever gotten so close, not in the several months since you both took the class. Even by the end of the class you both walked out together to discuss more on the paper that you both were supposed to submit by that night. The two of you were so into your conversation that you didn't even realize that you had left your laptop in the classroom. "Shoot! I need to go back,": you turned around and cringed at the number of people walking slowly out of the class like a herd of sheep. Sumin chuckled and shook his head at you, "You're unbelievable, kind of like my friend Hyunwoo," he chuckled. You only rolled your eyes and nudged his body with yours lightly, "You're a jerk," your bottom lip dropped into a teasing joke, "Text me later about your part?" Sumin nodded in agreement with a smile, letting you know that he will do his part of the paper before you ran off. Sumin barely took two steps forward when the person he was talking about rounded the corner and patted him on the shoulder, "Hey man, you done?" he smiled widely. "Yup, you done checking the tree?" Sumin's words almost made Hyunwoo choke on his own spit, "How'd you know about that?" it was obvious that not even Hyunwoo could hide that fact. Sumin simply smirked and wrapped his friend in a friendly hug, "We got eight other close friends, man, how long do you think you would be able to hide that fact?"

The next occurrence happened the night Hyunwoo decided that he wanted to get some midnight snacks with Yechan and Minjae who were pulling an all-nighter at their dorms. It was an impromptu decision for all of them and Hyunwoo didn't even want to go in the first place but Yujun was giving him puppy eyes and Seeun annoyed him enough that he go to get them what they wanted (which, halfway out of his dorm, it had just occurred to him that both Yujun and Seeun could've gone out themselves). At the same time, you came out of your dorm clad in a hoodie, mask, and your comfiest pyjama pants because you were feeling pissed at yourself because you hadn't found the mystery cutie. No matter where you go, no matter what you do, it had been exactly seven days since that (un)fateful day and logically speaking (and if you were to put your trust in destiny's hands), the day you would've most likely to meet him again was today on similar circumstances (because it hadn't rained). So you waited and waited but the mystery cutie never even showed so you spent two hours after class for nothing only to come home to your door opened which means that one of your roommates was in your room and you were betting on the narcissistic kleptomaniac who has been shit-talking you behind your back. You were so ready for the new semester so you, Liz, Haewon, and Rei could move in together. Near tears, you got into the convenience store to gather everything you need to calm yourself down. The three guys were already in the convenience store, talking loudly with each other, laughing and joking around and even narrowly missing you; when you were in one isle, they were in the next, when you turned to stare at the rack, they passed you, even noticing your presence but not your identity. Out of the three however, Hyunwoo was the one who noticed the hard sigh you exhaled and the times you clenched your fists when you couldn't find something or saw that it wasn't in stock. Even when he was paying for the things he bought (which were mostly Yujun and Seeun's snacks), he couldn't help but turn his head to your crouching figure in front of the instant noodles, completely oblivious that you were the person he has been looking for this past week. When you paid for your item, the cashier put something you swore you didn't pick out earlier. "Excuse me, I don't think that's mine," you pointed out, making the cashier stop her movements. But she nodded her head in the direction of the door, "The guy before bought something for you," when the bag was in your hand and you were able to reach into the plastic bag and took out what she had put. During your walk out, you couldn't help but keep staring at the lollipop that had a smiling face on its wrapper. It was stupid maybe, but you were just so happy to have gotten it and just like that your day was made.

The last occurrence happened when Hyunwoo and you decided that maybe simply standing or watching near the tree was not enough, you have to be attached to the tree. So that Friday, after your morning class, you buckled down and settled on the grass, studying (or pretending to be) as you keep a lookout. "Okay, but can we at least get you lunch?" Liz asked, smiling sympathetically at you. You shook your head but Haewon rolled her eyes and linked her arm with Liz and Rei, "We'll just get her like a kimbap or something, she's definitely going to want to eat, she's just stubborn," she teased as she walked away. As they walked away, Hyunwoo parted ways from his friends and approached the tree, eyes filled with determination to finally meet you again and this time properly talk to you. Neither of you realized that you both were on opposite sides of the tree, blissfully unaware as you occupied yourselves with working on whatever you could work on. For thirty-five minutes the both of you could hear the other typing on their laptop or writing or opening up books but both of you thought those were the sounds that came from other students from the nearby tree. You didn't even hear the sounds anymore once your friend came back and sat down around you; Liz next to you and Rei and Haewon across you. As you chew on your kimbap, all four of you chatted, well, mostly the three of them because you were keeping your eyes on the people walking nearby, waiting for the mystery cutie to pass by not knowing that he was on the other side, smiling to himself at the sound of you four being so happy and carefree. He was rather intrigued because he noticed that there was a voice that got him feeling some sort of recognition and just as he was about to take a peek, he heard someone call his name from the building. "Dude, we have a rescheduled class 10 minutes ago, what are you doing?" his classmate called out, making Hyunwoo's eyes widen in realization and quickly pack his things. "Shit, this is bad," he muttered to himself as his hands tried to shove everything in as quickly as possible. But in his clumsiness, he accidentally let his water bottle roll away to the other side of the tree without him realizing it. Just as Hyunwoo strapped his backpack on, a voice halted his movements, "Here, I think you dropped this." He looked up to see a girl holding his water bottle and he immediately nodded and took it from her hands, "Thanks, uh..." "Liz," "Yeah, thank you, Liz," he smiled at her before rushing to his class. Noticing Liz talking, you tried to peek over and saw a guy in a rather clean-looking smart outfit running off into the building. "Who's that?" Rei asked, noticing what you saw as well, "Some guy, he dropped his water bottle and I helped," Liz shrugged. "He was cute," Haewon said before she nudged you with her foot, snickering slightly, "Do you think you wanna switch mystery cutie for him?" she teased. You took one last glance at the guy (or his back since that was all you could see) and shrugged, "My mystery cutie is probably like ten times more handsome," you stated obliviously as you munched on your kimbap, fully unaware that that was actually your mystery cutie.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Saturdays were your favourite as you have no classes and you have no responsibilities. As a university student, you didn't have much going for you nor do you have many options for entertainment. So more often than not, you utilize the campus facilities however you can. One of your favourites is the shuttle bus to the heart of the city which was not that far. Little did you know, Hyunwoo felt exactly the same way about being a student but his way of utilizing the university facilities is slightly different considering his friends are lawless hooligans.

That day, you had just gotten back from the mall with your friends and you decided to leave early because you had this feeling that you had forgotten something. Funny enough, it wasn't an umbrella because you found yourself always carrying mystery cutie's umbrella with you. Initially, it was just in case you accidentally bumped into him somewhere you didn't even think you'd bumped into him or something. Honestly after not meeting him for a whole week, you got the impression that there's a chance that he might not even be a student at the university (wrong). He could be a visiting student (wrong). Or maybe a transfer or even an international student doing a semester program (wrong). Would it be ridiculous to assume that he's a TA or even a new professor or a potential new TA or a potential new professor? (yes because it is so dumb to think that). So you went home by yourself and on the way, you realized that because you were going to be dropped off at the campus, you could maybe go around a bit to look at the campus life activity board to see if you could spot his face in the pictures there.

Meanwhile, Hyunwoo and some of his friends (Jinsik, Sumin, Junmin, and Hunter) decided that they wanted to spend some time at the gym. As active boys, it was important for them to burn energy somehow so that they wouldn't get into any trouble. Same principle as raising children. Or puppies. They have to tire themselves just enough to be obedient and not cause any mess. And it was fun or maybe just interesting to see the university that would usually be busy with the hustle and the bustle of busy busy students and their lives and their need to keep up with their schedules and ambitions. On Saturdays, Hyunwoo was able to simply appreciate the university as it is. He wasn't really sure of a university with an open concept as he would more often than not think about the practicality and even the effectiveness of it for students (other than giving something green to stare at and providing fresh air to students who spent most of their days in stuffy rooms with other students who looked just about done with studying). But he came to like the place and its concept and he was able to appreciate it even more ever since he saw you. He liked being able to find you in odd places every now and then which has now become frustrating because now that he actually wanted to meet you, you're nowhere to be seen like a Fata Morgana. Maybe he has to reach a certain level of desperation first.

Unlike the days before when he had to go to class and there was a higher chance of meeting you, Hyunwoo decided against dressing up. He let his usual flop of hair down and wore a loose sleeveless work shirt and training pants with his favourite workout shoes. It was him getting back to simplicity despite the protests of Minjae who insisted he wore an athleisure outfit which was stupid because although Hyunwoo looked absolutely amazing and he felt confident in the form-fitting shirt and parachute fabric pants, he couldn't move for shit and he was uncomfortable. So he ran out as soon as he changed so that he didn't have to listen to Minjae nagging at him for not listening.

"Are you ready to admit now?" Hyunwoo's reps on the chest machine halted at the question thrown by Sumin. "Admit what?" he asked with an eyebrow raised. Sumin dropped the dumbell he was curling before standing up and leaning next to Hyunwoo's machine, forcing the guy to strain his neck slightly to look at him, "That your little miss scattered-petal-umbrella-borrower is probably a figment of your imagination," he teased, smirking at the guy whose face scrunched into a scowl. Hunter walked by and smack his older friend on the back with a towel, "Don't be mean, Sumin hyung, Hyunwoo hyung said it happened so it must have happened," Hunter was definitely trying to back his friend up but somehow, it seemed like he wasn't. Hyunwoo couldn't help but scoff at his two friends, "Why does it seem like you guys think I'm crazy?" "Well," Junmin walked over and sat on a bench close to them, "It's not that we think you're crazy, but it kinda does feel like you're avoiding us and using this... Mysterious girl that no one has seen as an excuse," he shrugged. Jinsik came by with kettlebells and started doing his reps as he joined the conversation. "We're just worried about you, man. You usually keep to yourself, yes, but this is a whole other level. I mean, if she's real in the first place, how come you haven't found her in the past week?" he asked. In frustration, Hyunwoo groaned and threw his head back onto the padding of his station's seat, "I can't believe I'm even saying this," he then looked to the side, straight into Sumin's eyes and pointed at him, "Mystery girl is in the same English class as you."

The revelation surprised everyone but not Sumin who simply raised an eyebrow at him. "Really? She's in my class?" he scoffed and Hyunwoo nodded, "Well, did you see her last time you came by to get me after that class?" Now, that question made the others shut their gasps and exclamations of a surprise to see how Hyunwoo would react. The guy froze and his eyes darted around in slight panic, knowing full well that he didn't and that answer might come off as how his friends had insinuated before. "Uh..." Hyunwoo looked around his friends as his brain try its best to string enough words to make a sentence that makes sense. "Well..." he started out, getting more nervous even though he was only facing his friends and their stupid questions. It didn't help that all of them looked genuinely intrigued and were patiently waiting for him to say something, anything as soon as he could. Unfortunately, the pressure got to him and he didn't think twice before he stood up, surprising his friends, especially with his announcement before he ran off and out of the gym, "I think I need to run laps outside."

With that, Jinsik smacked Sumin upside the head, making the guy groan and clutch the side where he got the impact. "What was that for!?" Sumin huffed, trying to rub away the pain. Jinsik smirked teasingly at him and leaned down, "Maybe that ought to realign your crooked brain so you could think straight next time you speak," then he ran away before Sumin could reach down, grab a dumbell and throw it at him.

Hyunwoo didn't like this. He didn't like feeling negative things especially if he was doubting himself and when he felt like he was getting pissed at his friends. He knew full well that none of them meant to, none of them wanted to piss him off or make him feel bad about himself, even Sumin despite the way his words were articulated. But it just made him feel bad about himself, it made him feel stupid as if his wanting to find this mystery girl is a pointless crusade when it's not that serious. It's not like Hyunwoo is going around everywhere asking girls if they are the girl he has been looking for. For one thing, he's not the prince charming from Cinderella. And his introversion would cause his social battery to deplete after 2 interactions hence causing him to flop down on the floor like a fish out of water. He so badly needs his social battery to survive his classes and actually get grades above passing which is all dependent on class interactions. It also wasn't like he didn't want his friends' help, it was just embarrassing to admit that he has a crush on someone that he had only seen from afar. Especially admitting it to Sumin who had been nothing but nice and proactive, introducing him to different people only for him to be interested in someone Sumin hadn't introduced him to yet. Again, he was well aware that it was stupid but he couldn't help but feel like that, especially in a circumstance like this one. The circumstance is his existence as an introverted, awkward klutz.

It didn't occur to him that he had been running around the campus for a solid 20 minutes. The soft droplets of water were what snapped him out of his trance in the first place. Almost at once, more droplets of water fell from the sky, drenching his body and forcing him to run for cover. Through the thick curtain of rain, Hyunwoo could barely see anything, everything seemed blurry and the sound rendered him in a confused state as he couldn't seem to decide where to run for cover. In the midst of confusion and mess, Hyunwoo managed to slip on the slippery, muddy ground and skidded forward until his body collided with a tree. On the ground, looking up, Hyunwoo finally realized that he was actually under the cherry blossom tree where you slipped yourself over a week ago. "Are you serious?" he exhaled sharply as his eyes closed, feeling like the universe was making a mockery out of him by causing a seemingly calculated accident to further mock him of his incapabilities to find you or even to show him how you must've felt when this happened to you. Now Hyunwoo knows perfectly well what it felt to see petals scattering around you as if they wanted to mark where you landed just to make you feel even more embarrassed.

Hyunwoo was just about ready to have the ground open up and swallow him whole so he could spend an eternity muddling in his own stupidity and incapabilities. But when he failed to feel the rain on him anymore, he opened his eyes to see you crouching on top of him with your bottom lip between your teeth and his umbrella covering both of you from the rain. "Are you reenacting my accident, stranger?" you teased.

Reflexes kicking in, Hyunwoo tried to sit up quickly but ended up knocking his head with yours. Quite hard actually as it sent the both of you reeling slightly back. "Oh, God! I'm so sorry!" he panicked, forgetting about his pain momentarily to tend to you, he went as far as ignoring his own pain momentarily and even forgetting that he was an awkward klutz, surprising you when he grabbed your face gently to look at the spot that was starting to turn red from the rather harsh impact. You were blushing at this point because he was closer than you thought he would be especially considering that this was your second meeting. But he didn't seem to notice it as he was so focused on you, completely oblivious that he also had a red spot from the impact, shown from between strands of hair. Seeing this, you couldn't help but giggle at him, "Okay, damn, forget you reenacting my accident, you're just clumsy." Just the sound of you giggling was enough to make his heart skip a beat and his body freeze. He wanted to believe that it was the building anticipation that took over him and distracted him from functioning as a human being.

The sound of the rain reminded you that Hyunwoo was still drenched and that you were also at risk of getting wet. As much as you liked him holding your face, you grabbed his wrist gently which caused his eyes to shift to yours from your forehead, "We should move inside the building, we don't wanna catch a cold now, do we?" you teased. Luckily, Hyunwoo seemed to realize his position fairly quickly and stood up with you. He even took the umbrella from your hand which prompted you to take his hand instead as you led him inside the building.

Despite both of your seemingly confident and calculate moves, you both were blushing like lovestruck fools (because you both were), avoiding each other's gaze as your hearts beat out of your chests. The both of you tried to convince yourselves that it wasn't the nerves it wasn't the absolute nerve-wracking realization that you both had FINALLY found each other on a day that neither of you expected. Nope, definitely not. It was... something else completely unrelated.

Once you both got inside the building, you immediately led Hyunwoo into an empty classroom and sat him down somewhere he wouldn't feel the cold draft. Hyunwoo was just glad to see you, he was following your instruction and let you lead him, situating him wherever and however you want like a little puppy. Once he was perfectly situated, you carefully folded his umbrella after taking it from his hand and placing your bag on the seat next to him. "Okay, I think I can find some towels from the clinic office, are you fine by yourself here?" you asked, cringing slightly now that you were able to see how pitiful he looked. But despite his unfortunate-looking appearance, he was smiling brightly and nodding enthusiastically, "Yeah, I'll be fine! Don't worry," he reassured. Hearing that, you nodded and immediately dash to get the things that you needed to help him.

However, just as you were about to step out, your feet halted and you took a step back into the classroom. You turned slowly and looked at him, seemingly hesitant to leave him alone. You didn't want to be dramatic, and you really do believe that the mystery cutie you had just finally found again after so long (over a week) wouldn't just disappear on you. But still, you had JUST found him. You didn't want to leave his side.

Hyunwoo seemed to notice your hesitance. The way your eyes turned just a little sad and the way your hand gripped the door clued him into your hesitance easily. He thought it was adorable how you were acting to him, to someone you barely know. "I won't go anywhere, I'll wait for you, right here." he smiled gently at you, effectively reassuring you, allowing you to leave the room with a lighter heart and a slight spring to your step which didn't go unnoticed by Hyunwoo who chuckled and shook his head at you.

Even once your steps disappeared out in the hallway, Hyunwoo couldn't help but stare at the door with a smile still etched on his face. It took some time for him to tear his eyes away and when he finally managed to, he took notice of his umbrella that was on the desk, in front of your bag that was placed next to him. There was something on it that caught his eye. Upon closer inspection, he noticed something on the handle that looked like some kind of sticker or plastic. He took the item in his hands and pulled the handle out to see that it was a plastic wrapper, plastered just a little bit above the handle with a sellotape and the more he looked at it, the more he noticed that it looked like the wrapper of the candy he bought for someone just a couple days ago. He thought that you must've added it there yourself for some reason and while technically it was his umbrella, he wasn't mad that you put a little decoration on it. "What a weird coincidence," he chuckled.

"What's a weird coincidence?" he didn't even realize that you had returned to the room until he heard your voice. He simply waved the umbrella in his hands, "Oh no, I'm just looking at this thing in my umbrella." You quirked an eyebrow as you placed one towel on another empty desk and approached him with another one, "You like that?" you grinned while handing him a towel before pulling out a chair to sit in front of him, "Some guy bought me a lollipop candy with that wrapper a couple of days ago because I guess I looked pitiful enough that he felt sorry for me," you chuckled. When you looked up, you saw Hyunwoo staring at you with his mouth slightly agape, he had even stopped drying his hair with the towel you just handed. You took his expression as his negative reaction to hearing you talk to him about some other guy while he was simply right there like as if you were trying to show off how wanted you were. With eyes widened to saucers, you raised your hands and shook them in a panicked manner, "No, I wasn't bragging! I was just- well, I didn't even know the person! Could be a guy, could be a woman with a boyish haircut, who knows?" You honestly didn't even know why you panicked in front of him, it's not like whatever he could say or think of you would matter. He's a stranger. So why does it matter to you if he perceives you positively?

Luckily before you blabber even more, Hyunwoo shook his head which was enough to shut your mouth. "No, it's not about that, it's just... You're that person?" now you're confused. Your eyebrows knitted together and you waited for Hyunwoo to say something as additional info because that sentence made no sense yet. "I... I went to the convenience store just outside the campus dormitory with two of my friends," realizing where he was going, your eyes widened and you cut him off, "One who's a civil engineering major and another who's majoring in veterinary science." Hyunwoo's heart once again skipped a beat but he couldn't help but continue what he wanted to say, "And we... I saw someone sighing in front of the ramen so I..." Again, you cut him off, "Told the cashier to give me the smiley lollipop candy."

For a moment there, you both just stared at each other, grinning like two idiots for no reason. From what you thought was an apparent misfortune as a very cute guy saw you in such an unfortunate situation, turned out to be the craziest entanglement of fate ever. It was as if you both were meant to have so much near misses so you both could meet at exactly the right moment, the right time, and the right place. Underneath the cherry blossom tree that you first fell in love with when you were so close to hating yourself for the decision that you thought was so stupid just so he could give you a new perspective on things.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

It was unfortunate (yet highly predictable) that Hyunwoo caught the flu after meeting you. Of course, his friend blamed him for wandering around for two hours aimlessly before coming back to the dorm and changing out of his wet clothes. For obvious reasons, Hyunwoo didn't tell his friends that he had finally met you. Not yet at least. The both of you agreed that after a week of your friends poking fun at each of you, it's best that you both got to know each other first. So you both exchanged numbers and had been texting each other quite frequently ever since. Hyunwoo's flu forced him to be on bed rest for three days which means that your plans of hanging out after class fell through. But to be honest, he was rather grateful for the situation because you have been sending him food and care packages to the dorm without him even asking. To avoid his friends' detection, he would more often than not say that he ordered takeouts for himself or that his mom sent him a care package. The closest call was on the last day when you sent him homemade soup that he deemed was a takeout he ordered but when Junmin received the package, it had a cute kitty sticky note that said 'get well right meow!" with two hearts at the end. It was at that moment Hyunwoo realized that it was a good thing he was rather agile because he had never moved that quick to steal the package from his friend's hands.

So after his bed rest, he was back to full health and was way more ready to go to the campus than he had ever been. He didn't even let Sumin or Minjae style him that day because as per the information he found out on day two, you actually loved his hair as a floppy mop of hair and his rather soft boy aesthetic; pastel cardigans, light jeans, and converses. So even with Minjae and Sumin following after him with verbal protests (Sumin) and a series of boos (Minjae), Hyunwoo was able to coast clear out the door.

You were no better. While Hyunwoo didn't specify what look he liked best on you (because in all honesty, he likes how you look no matter the clothes or style you were wearing), you put an effort into your clothes that day which rather surprised your friends. They were gawking and asking questions because it was quite a drastic change. It wasn't like you changed into Elle Woods or Sharpay Evans out of the blue but it was obvious that you paid attention to what you were wearing that day.

Both your and Hyunwoo's friend groups were rather confused at your smiling faces and your constant attention to your phones. It wasn't unusual for you to be focused on your phone, but for you to giggle at it openly? They thought you had gone mad from looking for a mystery cutie. Little did they know, you were simply feeling your feelings for him, the mystery cutie you now know as Hyunwoo.

You were walking with your friends after your last class of the day, happy that not only you were finally able to meet up with Hyunwoo after waiting for quite a while but also because you both orchestrated a surprise for both of your friend groups.

"I'm really worried for you, you haven't stopped smiling all day!" Haewon said, trying to get you to stop walking so fast and to talk to her. But you shrugged her off gently, stopping at where you had promised to meet Hyunwoo, under the cherry blossom tree where you and he each got your taste of the universe's prank. "Haewon, guys, I swear I'm totally fine!" You pause to shrug your laptop back to a more secure position on your shoulder, "I'm not being weird, okay? I'm just... Happy, I guess? Giddy, maybe," you grinned and it didn't reassure them whatsoever. Before either one of them could say anything, you heard someone calling you from behind and when you turned around, you saw Sumin, Hyunwoo, and the people Hyunwoo had introduced to you (informally by showing pictures of them and telling you their names), Yujun, (the cutie you asked to sit with you that one time, Yechan, Minjae, and Jinsik. "Oh!" Sumin grinned, walking faster to you with his arm around Hyunwoo's shoulder, completely oblivious of Hyunwoo's knowing smile. "Hey, (y/n)! How have you been?" he asked, "Good, Sumin, I'm glad our paper hasn't killed you like you said it would," Yechan and Jinsik snickered at this while Yujun tilted his head to the side and his lips widened into a large grin, "Oh, you're the girl who helped me find a sat for lunch last week!" he exclaimed. At this revelation, Hyunwoo raised an eyebrow at you but you just casually (while trying your best to be lowkey) waved him off as a sign that you would tell him later. "By the way," Sumin stepped up, bringing Hyunwoo to focus much to your surprise, "(y/n) I'd like for you to meet my good friend-"

Your friends' and his' jaws dropped hard onto the ground when they saw you grinning widely and reaching a hand out to Hyunwoo's tuft of hair. "I see you decided to FINALLY let your mop down today," you teased which made Hyunwoo chuckle. "Yeah, I know you said you liked my hair like this and look," he stepped out of Sumin's hold (to which Sumin's hand just flopped uselessly next to his body) to spread his arms wide, showing off his look, "I'm wearing a cardigan too!" You have to admit that you couldn't help but bite your bottom lip at his adorable navy and light blue heart cardigan and Hyunwoo couldn't deny that seeing you look at him like that made his chest puff out with pride. Yujun and Yechan began clambering and reaching to clutch each other when they saw Hyunwoo reaching out to grab your laptop bag from your arm and offered his elbow to you. With a tilt of his head, Hyunwoo made a show to you (and his friends for good measure) when he said, "Shall we?" to which you gratefully accepted. Before you both took off, you turned around slightly and look at Hyunwoo's friends, "Told you his mystery girl was someone from Sumin's class." And Hyunwoo took a look at your friends with the most charming smile he could muster, "Aren't you glad the things that happened to (y/n) led her to this moment?"

As you both walked away, your friends and his began erupting into exclaims of disbelief and surprise but also relief. It was absolutely priceless and you would have definitely paid to see it in slow motion and to know exactly what they thought or said when it finally dawned upon them what had just happened. Overall, you both were just glad that things worked out in the end, everything worked out perfectly fine and oddly enough they all happened in one place.

Something told you that from that day forward, you both would love that stupid cherry blossom tree.

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[murasaki-cha]

Ok I'm not finished with Foxglove, not even halfway there but I got theories!

I'm super sure Signa isn't Life. Blythe is. And this is not just because I'm majorly shipping Blythe with Fate no no actually that would cause more angst I wouldn't like that.

No it's because of few very simple reasons:

There were 2 tapestries that were out of Fate's control: Signa's and Blythe's. And while Signa's startet getting woven with the silver thread, it was only because she kept saving Blythe's life

Blythe literally saw the life slipping from one of her servants but never saw a spirit, an already dead person, while Signa is able to see spirits that are very well dead, strengthening her connection with her being a Reaper than Life

Signa defied her fate by choosing Death while Blythe defied her fate (with the help of Signa nonetheless but still) by LIVING

Fate said said the reason Signa drew Death close to her so many times is because of the fact that he had killed her in the past, but Fate literally created Signa to be Death's perfect match so of course he was going to be drawn by her. Now who drew Death in so many times last book and not because it was woven by Fate? Blythe. Blythe who almost died so many times. Blythe who Death just happened to choose by sheer coincidence to save. Blythe who's family was beginning to get surrounded by death.

Blythe's interactions with Fate are one of the reasons I ship them but also one of the reasons she may be Life. She's calm around him. Signa is always cautious or scared of him and she always mentions how she finds more calm in Death's cold embrace (no pun intended). Even others find him intimidating in his human prince disguise. Meanwhile Blythe is odly calm around him. She doesn't like him because he accused her father of poisoning yes, but she's never put off or intimidated by his presence. She talks to him naturally, unbothered, only keeping up pretences because he's a "prince".

And one of the biggest reasons why I think Blythe = Life is her reaction to the painting of Life. She was drawn in by the painting and I quote "Nearly lost her breath." When she truly looked at her. She wanted to get closer and inspect the painting. And when Fate asked her what she thinks of the woman (Life) Blythe told him that she looked like she wad great fondness in her but was sad and tired and even Fate was slightly surprised. She also immediately recognised the woman in the painting was the same one as in the marble fountain statue. Meanwhile Signa never even spared a glance at the painting.

Fate literally calls her "The girl who defied Death". Signa technically does die but just temporarily. Blythe is the one who defied death. Blythe always Lived. And in the narration it was said that if only Blythe looked up, she would have seen the threads of Fate and the only person who's ever seen the threads is Signa who jas the powers of a Reaper.

As I said I'm not even halfway done with the book, I'm only up till the chapter Fate tells Signa she "is" Life, but there are already so many hints! Also why else make Blythe a secomdary main character if she's not even that important? They could have done that since the last book.

Fate is just in his delulu era, thinking Signa's Life

I'm gonna be pissed if I'm wrong because it's very obviously but again it's just a theory

Edit: It was fairly obvious but my god this is how I feel

[9thbutterfly]

Tiny book reviews

Once again it has been a few months since I did this. And I've continued to read even as work got busy, which feels like a big accomplishment!

I feel like my brain has recovered a bit from the exhaustion of the last few (more than a few?) years, but let's see if I actually remember things about the books I read two months ago.

She Who Became the Sun, by Shelley Parker Chan

It was... okay? It's nice to get out of Fantasy-Europe, but it also didn't really pull me in. I guess it feels kind of lonely, if that makes sense? I like books where I can feel a web of characters liking and caring about each other, and this wasn't that.

Drachenglanz (Empire of Ivory), by Naomi Novik

One of those middle-of-the-series books that I pick up at the book bazaar to see if I like the style and the rest of the series is worth reading, and in this case, yes it is. Even though I had very little idea what was going on or who the characters were, it felt engaging enough that I want to read the rest.

Grass for his Pillow, by Lian Hearn

I remember little about this, except that it was a quick easy read and left me annoyed that I had not yet ordered the next book.

The Burning God, R.F. Kuang

I wanted to like this trilogy, and was interested enough in the plot to finish it, but it was too grim and bleak for me, and while the first part still had the saving grace of characters who cared about each other, that fell away as they ended up dying or betraying each other, so I was pretty much just trying to get through to the end as quickly as possible.

Temeraire, by Naomi Novik

Starting to read this in the proper order now. I have very vague memories of reading this before, when my best friend lent it to me years ago, but really nothing past "dragon egg gets found on enemy ship", so I got to read and enjoy the rest as if I had never read it before.

An Artificial Night, by Seanan McGuire

I guess I have been well and truly drawn into this series. Going back to the Bay Area, even in fictional form, is always hard, because there is always a gaping hole where my friend Cindy no longer lives (I started reading Seanan's books mostly because Cindy knew her personally). This one was harder to read than the previous two in the series for a different reason, though - abducted children are much harder to bear since becoming a parent. Anyway, itching to buy the next one, but I need to somewhat reduce my TBR pile first.

Angela's Ashes, by Frank McCourt

I have no idea how this ended up in my TBR pile (got it from a neighbour, maybe?) and I wasn't even going to read it, because it is so not my thing, either in subject matter or style, but somehow it still drew me in. Glad to be done with it, though, because alcoholic parents just. Piss. Me. Off. Look, I know it's an addiction and they can't help it, but also get your shit together and stop making your children suffer, for fuck's sake. #yeah thanks Papa

Die Herrin der Farben [The Mistress of the Colours], by Peter Dempf

Another one that I think I got from our neighbour. Historical novels can be nice, but this one annoyed me right out the gate with stereotypical "women were treated like trash and corsets mean they couldn't breathe" stuff. Sure some of the "treated like trash" might be true, but to have that be all you have to say about the lives of women is just not enough for me any more. And I couldn't care about the plot, either.

Into the Narrowdark, by Tad Williams

A reread, and I immediately wanted to start into another one.

Tad, oh Tad. What do I say to describe his books? Do I love his books because the characters always care about each other, or is characters caring about each other so important to me because his books helped shape who I am? But either way, this book, like all of the Osten Ard books, is full of characters I love so much, from my decades-old friends like Simon, Miriamele or Tiamak, to my new "babies" like Jesa and Nezeru, and also full of mysteries that I desperately want the answers to. What is going on in Tanakiru? Why is Yeja'aro behaving like he does? And what the HELL is the Red Thing?!

Anyway, if you don't know what I'm talking about, go get yourself The Dragonbone Chair, and then the rest of the series. This is an order.

Voll im Bilde (Moving Pictures), by Terry Pratchett

I bravely keep trying to read Terry Pratchett, whenever I find one of his books at the bazaar, because I know everyone loves him, and I want to know what people are talking about, what all the clever quotes on tumblr are from and such, but it always feels like trying yet another dish from a country whose cooking style you just don't enjoy. (Not that I have encountered such a situation. Maybe I should say, like taking a sip of yet another alcoholic drink, knowing I just do not enjoy the taste of alcohol.) I guess I got even less out of this one than others because I'm not a film person, either. And I still don't understand the point of some kind of dark force making people make movies? But I also don't want to try harder to understand.

After all, have decided I need to reread all the Osten Ard books yet again, and to wonder some more about the Red Thing.

[aashi-heartfilia]

Maybe ochako will still get a cover?

With all the breaks and drawn out developments in bnha recently, I don't think what horikoshi said about the story ending so soon is true anymore, or at least not in such a small number to the finish and definitely not by the end of the year or around there.

So who really knows how many more volumes there's going to be or what part ochako will play in them?

As big of a part she's played in the story, especially here in recent arcs, it seems like there's still a good chance

Honestly, I have lost hope and I'm pissed at the author.

THIS IS SO UNFAIR.

What's more annoying is that it's not even bad contextually, because Ochako vs Toga (the main battle) doesn't happen in vol 38 and we also see Toga getting this crisis moment where she thinks "Why couldn't I truly become Jin?" in vol 38 only, where she wrecked havoc in the battlefield. But then, it was about Ochako too, who noticed her tears and we got this beautiful double spread...

It was about Ochako noticing Toga's tears and reaching out to her. And If Horikoshi knew, he was gonna cram the entire Todoroki Drama, TogaChako battle and AMvsAFO in vol 39 only then why didn't he pre-planned to get everything in order?

Since DabiShouto already got a cover, he could have just made that colour page as the cover for Vol 38 and then give us an AMvsAFO cover for Vol 39. This way, we would have all Duo VS covers, with DkSg, DbSh, TgCk and AMAFO. But nope! He decided to please all fans instead of giving justice to its main FL, he decided to give Toga an entire cover and then cram all other three in the next one which sucks!

If it was an entire page dedicated to TodoDrama or AM, I wouldn't have many complaints because at least it was dedicated to a single motive but by trying to please all his fans, he made a blunder, and it turned out to be a weird mixture of 3 characters who never had a proper one-on-one interaction in the entire manga.

AND I must say, I hate this cover with all my might because I could NEVER get over the fact that Ochako was robbed, not once, not twice but thrice!

And to answer your question, no. With how Hori is wrapping up all the plotlines, it is highly unlikely that the manga will drag any further. In fact, we would be lucky if we even get a proper aftermath after this war.

Since BkDk are his favorites, he would dedicate his entire time in making them the star of the show (as if they aren't already are) and it's highly unlikely that Ochako will ever get any spotlight again in the manga.

Plus, there were just so many big moments where she could have gotten some spotlight but then, it's just another shallow case of favouritism by the authors.

I'm sooo angry, I might as well write my own Manga at this point.

[langst-is-my-unborn-baby]

Dropping an ask down in your fab inbox! Would the fair writer consider the team pissing lance off for (insert langsty reason, like they’re all just being pricks or sth) and then lance just exploding and being a bamf as he big bro lectures the shit out of everyone (including shiro) Ending is up to you good sir of many talents I bid you adieu

The necessary author’s note: I made a few promises over the years to return to this account and to the fandom, and I’ve tried to start, and I have always failed. But I knew, the moment I went through my heaped inbox and saw your user – I had to try. You were one of my first supporters and really inspired me to get this blog as far as it went. So even if you’ve moved on, my return to VLD hell is in your honour.

 Binned Jacket

Perhaps the filter system of the castle was in need of servicing as Lance’s grimaced away his inability to breath coherently. Frustration was not a foreign feeling to him, of course not. He had always dived straight into arguments, letting his insecurities burn his bridges and bloat a boisterous ego. Regardless, he stewed in a beginning anger that left his cheeks hot. Of course, anger was a secondary emotion, it built on Lance’s unexplainable sadness.

 Scratch that- his sadness was most definitely explainable.

 “You got rid of my jacket?” the words had left his mouthbefore his thoughts could gather.

Allura’s gleaming look inferred that she had not taken his abhorrence seriously. Shiro beside her seemingly used to and unfazed by his loud tone. The team seemed incredibly nonchalant about what he considered a very personal attack.

“As I was saying, you are defending this Universe- ambassadors to many systems now. I just need to give you all that look,” Allura expressed, an uncalloused hand pressed against her chest as she preached. That look of far-gonejoy in her eyes was one that would have brought a smile to Lance’s face.

Lance could not help but snark back. “You only scrapped my clothes.” The twisted expression of his face made him feel moments away fromglowering. “You didn’t even just ask me not to wear it, you threw it.”

“Not threw, binned,” Pidge smiled from the couch, eyes never leaving her tablet. “Rest assured I’d be there if there was some coat-tossing game, my new gadget needs something to test its strengths.”

Lance could not believe it. Well, he could. It was becoming common to be laughed off by his teammates, for his possessions to be considered with little regard. He looked around, Shiro appeared to only be standing by to ensure Lance didn’t escalate this situation. Keith was arms-crossed and sighing. Coran smiling away behind Allura. Hunk was completely absorbed in his latest recipe transcription… bless him.

“Lance, I am going to give you new clothes,” Allura laughed, although it truly sounded humourless. “You understand that, don’t you? I am just tidying your appearance.”

“Pretty-boy does not want to hear that,” Keith said, whistling lowly afterwards. Shooting Lance, a quippy smile.

His jacket. His homely possession. His most genuine reminder of his sister Rachel who wore a matching copy.

“This is ridiculous,” Lance spat. “Where is your respect?” His eyes zeroed onto Allura, he was determined to hold her gaze, her gleeful expression fell in an instant.

Like the rotting of an apple, Shiro’s eyebrows drew together, a recognisable anger in his expression. Lance felt a tinge of a sting, string strangling his heart that struggled to beat evenly. His failing hero held his eyes momentarily. No apologetic look.

“Lance, refrain from such language,” Shiro said, his fingers running through his hair as he seemed to try to hide a huff of annoyance.

“It’s just a jacket, Lance,” Keith offered, a plain smile tempted his features. Dark eyebrows drawn together in parodied confusion. Lance’s chest constricted whilst his cheeks broke a hot and maddened red. Keith was finally warming from the cold rival he once was, but Lance felt revolted instead of pleased.

“It. Is. Not. ‘Just a jacket,’ you asshole,” Lance scoffed, his fingers making air quotation marks.

Shiro sounded breathless. “Lance!”

He was almost certain that a scolding was supposed tocontinue. Lance pushed his arms out, waving them off as he lifted his chin. “No,Shiro, you all-” the words fell from his mouth harshly. “You all can just listen.”

He was certain even Pidge was finally looking at him, shifting uncomfortably in her spot. Fingers running tirelessly against her tech as she sucked in a breath.

He made eye contact with Hunk, who had finally put down his work. The latter’s face has scrunched, his lips pointed downward. But Lance had trust. Hunk looked at him with concern but not contempt, he was worried, but he had not placed forth any expression of judgement. Bless him truly.

“You ‘binned’ my only reminder of my family, of my sister.” He was certain he saw Pidge lean back, shoulders tense and square. He turned to Allura, frustrated look unbreaking. “Tell me her name.”

“What?” She stuttered, wavering ever so slightly, a humbling discomfort appearing through her faulter.

“What is my sister’s name?” Lance repeated, an eyebrow raising.He turned. “Shiro, do you even know, I’ve told you.”

The man bristled, but then rubbed the back of his neck, eyes a wobble of confliction. “I don’t know.”

Keith’s voice came quiet but blunt. “How is this relevant, why does any of that matter?”

“Because it just does!” Lance said, fighting the urge to grab whoever was closest and shook them until they understood. “My sister, my person, the one who knows me better than any of you.”

“Lance-“ Allura tried her voice but fell silent. The galaxy fellsilent.

“But I thought you knew me, I thought you respected me, but what you did.” Lance struck a fierce look to Allura. “And to what you all allowed, encouraged. That was anything but.”

Shiro looked stricken, the first to look truly ashamed. “Lance,” he said, so quietly. His call of his name was different to Allura’s. It was remorseful, it was an attempt to tend a wound, but it was like a Band-Aid to a bullet-hole.

“We aren’t some team,” Lance suddenly shifted his gaze, hisfury burned as tears on the edge of his eyes. He steeled his stare to the ceiling. “All I had to connect me to Earth, and you took it from me. Rachel. I don’t know if she’s safe, if I’ll ever see her again.”

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in.

Allura had a hand on her chest when he finally composed himself.

“I’m here for the Galaxy that needs us. I’m here for you all. You need to meet me halfway because we aren’t teasing children nor unfriendly co-workers. We are a family, so act like it,” Lance said, the scold falling easy to his lips. How often had he once spoken like this to the family youngsters?

He looked back on his once trusted team, their slack expression. Lips itching to say something but choking on their knowledge that they was no listenable answer.

“Now, get my jacket back.”

[limeade-l3sbian]

I actually really appreciate you for that ratings posts.

The “humbling”‘aspect is enraging because it’s men allocating and ranking us as inferior, their opinions are never solicited, it’s just arrogance how they refuse to see us as equals.

I had a man online do that to my art once. Said it would look good in a coffee shop. Really triggered me.

I’m humble but I’m also honest that while I’m not good at everything, I’m very good at drawing. It’s a skill I’ve practiced and got into from an early age and over the years got good at. I’ve gotten 2 different ribbons for some of my ceramics pieces at an art fair. I’m proud of my art work and my sister loved a piece so much she asked for it as a Christmas gift. Someone else asked if I could draw his cat for him. So I’ve done a few “commissions” (I’m not a professional, it repulsed me how I was just trying to have a positive interaction and it was twisted as me seeking approval and how rude it was. Covertly suggesting it wasn’t good enough when I didn’t ask. Also artists don’t rate each others art. Even my art teacher said art is art. I do pencil sketches. My teacher when I took classes really liked them I mean I did well and was already self taught. My mother ‘s side of the family jokes that I got their “art gene my mom would joke that the art gene skipped her, because her brother and sister are really good, my uncle did fine art that looks like you can touch it, and my cousin is good too. )

Also an artist would never say that they don’t rate people’s art work because you can’t really “rate” art. It triggered me because I always worry about being good enough. And I haven’t drawn in a while due to oppressive circumstances like not even having privacy and personal space and being constantly in survival. Don’t sleep well, so I get anxious “what if I can’t draw again?”

Men are evil. Like why do they feel the need to “humble “ us? That pisses me off when they act like a judge of my value that makes me feel like this 🔪🔪

How do I not let past comments ruin my enthusiasm?

After my mom died, after I sought help, after I discolored sexual abuse, and was blamed… (and I only stopped for the sake of other women,) I acted out my traumas with men online and woukd engegr in behaviors while under the influence, cause I figured I was ruined anyway, I felt suicidal and wanted ti dissociated. Only stopped because I care about how my choices can harm other women. ) but it’s ironic because I feel like I ruined myself by engaging and interacting with men.

I grew up in a bubble I truly didn’t fathom how cruel they are.

I want to feel passionate and “narcissistic” about how good I am at art again.

Is it a jealously thing? Why do they do it ?

I wish I never engaged, I feel ruined like it will always be in my head, thar rating/ like sense of not feeling good enough existed before that comment but I don’t want it to crush my joy, it triggered me and I ruminjatr over the fear of others not liking my art; I’ve always used it to connect with other. I feel like being traumatized by men has made it so I struggle to connect/lost the connection I miss that I use to have to myself.

Do a lot of men lack talent? Is that the thing?

I could get over being given a 1/10 or told I’m ugly because my own father use to neg me while everyone else called me pretty, I know whh men neg. But it feels soul crushing to go after something personal like that.

You cannot be ruined, and you carry the same diligence and discipline that every artist carries.

I weirdly had a lot of artist friends growing up (weird because I didn't seek them out. We would just be friends and it would come out that they're really good artists lol), and I never told them that they were "lucky" they were so good. I told them "you've got a lot of patience" and when I got older, my go-to was always, "Damn, the discipline on you is insane."

Writing and visual art are similar but different. I write, but like you said, I haven't really been doing it the way I used to. There is a lot of love and self reflection and patience that goes into getting something the way you want it. Not the way people will enjoy it, but the way you want it.

You are afraid you will never be "able" to draw again. I have fears that I will never be "able" to write again. Our circumstances are undoubtedly different in terms of what has forced us to push aside our passions, but that anxiety and fear of never being able to return is the same. And I think, for me, the answer is: we might not.

We might not get back to the way we used to draw/write. What comes after these current and past tribulations in your life will change because of the circumstances that have forced you to go into survival mode (I am deeply sorry about your mom). You won't see the world the way you did after this. There will be small things in this life that you are now aware of. New fears. New dreams. New perspectives. New attitudes. You'll have changed, so it's not so insane that your art will change with you.

For me, writing used to be an escapism. Less realistic and more the way I wished things were. But I realized a few years ago that I feel more connected to my writing when I incorporate problems that I have or that I see around me. But it's still hard for me on a technical level to return to form.

The comments will hurt. Even the strongest people admit that despite the walls and thick skin they build, there is always a crack that someone manages to slip through. That, from a man or woman, is an unfortunate part of life. People will try and give you grief about something they know nothing about. My father is probably the worst writer I have ever met LMAO but he tried to be rude about my writing as a child. As a child. He was trying to break me down before I could even stay home on my own.

It's not about repelling the comments at all times. I guess in a sense, it's like being your confidence's immune system. Absorb these comments, see what you can take from it. If there's nothing there, then you will feel the effects, but it'll flush out eventually like the shit it is. And if there is something to it, then hold onto that and flush out the rest.

Returning to that passion might be a longer road than the first time around. But you have that rare and impressive discipline of artists that makes people annoyed. That ability to burn for progress. That you even ache to return to form is like noticing the faint light in your soul's window, proving that something is still flickering in there.

When you find it again, because you will, it will look different. The lines may be softer or more jagged. You might favor this color over that one now. All these little things will be so different! But when you find it again, because you will, you'll look back at the old way you used to do things and think, "That's so funny. I used to be obsessed with doing it that way."

And there won't be anything wrong with the old passion, you'll just have a new one. <3

[selfdiagnosedeyemotif]

Chapter Four (Praem), pt. 2:

The last part is a name that has been scratched out to the point of illegibility

Praem thinks that last part to herself, before the dread sinks in

“Blood split upon this stone” “Break the razor”

She doesn’t have the time to feel the abject horror of that when she hears a blade drawn behind her

“No more lies, Praem. What did you bring me here for?”

Ekaterina has the tip of her rapier at the back of Praem’s neck

She is pissed.

“I know you knew about it. You recognized the dagger in Macbergen, and the description of the waterfall in Millheart. Why are you lying to me?”

“Listen, there has been some kind of misunderstanding here, if you would simply let me expl-”

“Why are you still lying?”

A pause.

“This is about when we first met. You’ve been lying to me even since then.”

“I-”

“I knew it. I had my suspicions, but never anything like this, Blade of Mist.”

“Why go through the trouble if only to kill me?”

“I thought we were friends.”

“Ekaterina, please! You must listen to me!”

“I think I’ve had enough of your lies. This ends here.”

Ekaterina lunges for Praem’s throat, but not before Praem sees it coming

She parries it easily, just like the traps that came before

With the dagger.

She didn’t even realise what weapon she went for.

Ekaterina laughs. “And that must be my murder weapon. Charming, truly. Was the seer in on your ruse as well?”

Praem sheaths the dagger and draws her sword.

The Fourth Boss: Ekaterina Raszio

The battle opens with Praem pleading Ekaterina to listen to her. She does not respond.

Ekaterina opens with two actions per turn and will increase that number by one after every break

She is a fencer, a defensive duelist; most of her actions have the ability to shield her or trigger counterattacks

Her first action of the fight will always raise her defense and give her two charges of a counterattack ability, similar to Predictive Parry

Her AI will focus aggressively on Praem, and most of her attacks are single-target, so it’s very likely that Praem will go down at some point during the fight

Praem reaching zero HP triggers a dialogue sequence where Ekaterina asks the party members directly why “they’ve chosen to ally themselves with this witch. You needn’t fight on her side.”

Reviving her will also trigger dialogue, where Ekaterina realises that reaching out to the party is pointless

Once she reaches 50% health, the following message appears on the screen: “Ekaterina is going for the kill!”, permanently boosting her physical attack and speed, as well as unlocking a few skills

One of her nastier skills unlocked by this is Disarming Strike, which, you guessed it, removes the target’s currently equipped weapon until the end of the fight

Another is Armourpiercer, which ignores the physical defense bonus granted by the armour and shield the target has equipped

And if you haven’t been dealing good damage to her but have been breaking her a lot, she probably has four actions at this point

This boss is Hard

Also she’s probably got some of the better AI in the game (up there with Catena), and will go after your support-capable characters after Praem is good and dealt with

One fun interaction is that if her counterattack ability is active, if a warrior with Predictive Parry active hits her, the two will bounce counterattacks back and forth until one runs out of charges

It can make for a good way to open up physical attacks against her again, but it also means risking a Lot of damage against the target. Use with discretion.

Before entering Boost Mode, Ekaterina will always use the skill Master’s Eyes, which lowers the party’s defense for three turns

The subsequent Boost Mode displays the message “Ekaterina has shifted her weight”, which is followed by the attack Master’s Flurry, attacking random party members with a grand total of seven sword attacks

Please note that your defense will be lowered before this attack comes in. Good luck :)

Overall I wish I had more to say about this (because good lord I had a lot to say about Sir Eldroy, so I can’t even use the excuse of this only being a chapter 4 boss)

[slashyroguefics]

AU-Gust Day 16: Road Trip

His divorce is finalized on a Tuesday. 

It’s rainy, the kind of rain where you can’t even leave the house, and he has to drag Winston out to take a piss but when the message comes from his lawyer he feels it in his chest. 

You’re officially divorced. 

Will thought he’d feel something when it was truly over, but all he feels is relief. He and Molly weren’t good for each other, hadn’t been for a long time, and even knowing she’d been cheating with her ex-husband hadn’t hurt as much as he thought it would. 

But even with the relief comes the urge to do something. 

You never want to do anything. 

God, Will, are you just gonna hide forever? 

I feel like I’m locked up here with you. 

He’s lived in his apartment only for seven months but suddenly it feels like a fate worse than death to stay. So he takes all his sick time - thirty two days - and packs up the car with Winston in the passenger seat before he just drives. 

Will had always wanted to go on a road trip, just like in the movies, but his genuine hatred of socializing resulted in no friends and even Molly had been a dog park fluke. 

No. 

He could do this with Winston, silent but loyal, and as they leave the state he feels freer than he has in a long time. 

Then, of course, only three days into his trip the killings begin. 

They call him The Wanderer. 

Mostly because he leaves bodies across the states. Beautiful, elaborate tableaus of horror that are found almost always by hikers. The Wanderer seems to want to be seen, but not seen, and though Will has struggled with his past leaving the FBI for his mental health he can’t help when he gets drawn into the case. 

And the dreams begin. 

He wakes up in a cold sweat, blood soaked images haunting his nightmares, and Winston usually wakes him up pulling on his shirt when he’s screaming. Will gets kicked out of three different hotel rooms in Tennessee, leaving the state in the middle of the night barely dressed, and when he reaches Illinois he reads about the body found just two states behind him. 

The Wanderer is almost trailing him, looming closer and closer, and when in North Carolina he can hardly sleep sucking down cheap coffee in diners that let him bring the dog. 

Which is where he meets Dr. Hannibal Lecter. 

Dr. Lecter is in North Carolina for a conference, Will had seen the signs for the Psychiatric Association of Medicine event just blocks away, and though it’s odd to see someone dressed in Armani sipping shitty coffee at two a.m. he still blushes when he notices the man’s eyes on him. It’s just the two of them, other than the waitress, and though he’s sure a night with someone who looks so out of his league he might as well be on Mars would be nice he’s not in the mood. 

But it’s still nice to be admired. 

Molly never once looked at him the way the stranger does, and when he gets up to stop at Will’s table he finds himself blushing. 

“Is this seat taken?” 

His accented voice is oddly thrilling, and when Will looks up he realizes the man is better looking than he realized. 

“Kinda,” he says, looking at the dog, “And he’s not really one for sharing.” 

“I see,” the man says, looking at the dog, “May I?” 

He slides in beside Winston, who easily lets him, and Will laughs at the face he makes when the dog licks his cheek. “See?” 

The handkerchief he pulls out looks just as expensive as the suit, but it’s oddly adorable when he wipes his face. “Yes, I…see,” he looks at Will and holds out his hand that Will takes, “Dr. Hannibal Lecter.” 

“Will Graham,” he says, unable to keep his own admiration secret, “And I’m just gonna say this before you even try. I’m flattered, but I just got divorced like a little over a week ago and…” 

“You’re so certain I was staring at you out of sexual attraction.” 

Will frowns. “Yeah, I mean…wait….if you’re not I…shit.” 

“No, no,” Hannibal says, smiling, “I was. I was just trying to save my own pride. I apologize.” 

“Oh,” Will laughs, rubbing the back of his neck, “Thank god. I thought I was gonna have to buy your…what was it you’ve been having other than coffee?” 

The waitress comes over and hands him another mug that she fills. 

“Gladys makes a very good apple tart,” Hannibal says, “I’ve had two, but as it’s so late…I should not have more.”

Gladys blushes. “You’re such a dear.” 

He smiles as she leaves. 

“Wow, she hasn’t stopped glaring at me since I brought the dog inside.” 

Hannibal frowns. “Has she?” 

“Yeah, I…I asked if he was allowed, since they have the sign on the door and all. She said yes but I think she meant no.” 

“Hmm.” 

Hannibal watches Gladys, eyeing her oddly, and Will blushes. 

“But it’s fine, honestly, I….I’ve been forcing him on people all over the US. It was bound to happen sooner or later.” 

He turns to Will. “All over?” 

Will blushes. “I’ve been…I’m on a road trip.”

“Oh,” Hannibal says, “That’s…it’s an odd time for it. What is it you do, Will?” 

“I’m a history teacher,” Will says, “I took off the last month before we get out of school because of the divorce and…yeah you don’t want to hear this.” 

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t.” 

He smiles. “Well…” 

Will proceeds to tell Hannibal pretty much everything, about Molly and Walter, even about the cheating, and when he’s about to bring up the Wanderer he pauses. 

“Will?” 

He takes a sip of his coffee, a little cold now, and sighs. “You didn’t ask why I’m here.” 

Hannibal looks down at his hands, then up again. “I know insomnia when I see it, or…is this not involuntary?” 

Will blinks back tears. “I…I used to work for…I helped solve murders.” 

The surprise he sees in Hannibal’s eyes is genuine. “Used to?” 

“I quit because it fucked with me mentally,” he sighs, “I…I have this thing where I can assume the killer’s point of view, and it…it got hard to keep them out after they came in. You know? I…I couldn’t take it anymore.” 

“Will…” 

“And I…I made the mistake of…looking into the Wanderer,” he looks up at Hannibal, “And now he’s,” he puts fingers against his temple as a tear falls down his face, “...in here. I have nightmares and…he’s getting closer. He was only a few states away when I got here. I feel like he’s following me . I know it’s crazy…” 

Hannibal puts a hand on Will’s. “It’s not crazy, Will,” he says, “You have anxiety related to your past and it was bound to happen when you began looking into such a gruesome subject. I imagine your fears will only grow if you don’t rescind this particular monster’s point of view.” 

“Don’t tell me you can cure me, because I…no offense…hate shrinks. I had counselors and shrinks all my life tell me I was crazy. I don’t need you to do the same.” 

“I would never.” 

“I…” 

He takes both of Will’s hands and squeezes, his gaze filled with sadness. 

“I would never attempt to cure you of this, Will, you…I wouldn’t advise that method.” 

Will sniffles. “Then what…” 

“I would tell you not to hide from him,” he says, his voice shaking, “Let…let him in and see what happens. You may be surprised.” 

His eyes widen and he shakes his head. “NO! I…” he sees Gladys turn to look at him sharply, “No, no, I…” he takes his hands back, “No fucking way.” 

“Will..” 

Will gets up, whistling, and Winston climbs under the table coming to his side. He throws down a twenty and sighs. “Thanks for..the talk but…I’m fine with hiding. Goodnight, Dr. Lecter.” 

He drives away, shaken up from the encounter, and goes to get two more cups of late night coffee before returning to the hotel. Will stares at them, hands shaking, and thinks about what Hannibal said. 

Let him in and see what happens. 

Will doesn’t know why he does it. 

Curiosity? 

But he doesn’t drink his coffee. 

Two hours later he falls asleep with Winston at his side, and in his dreams it’s not Hannibal in the diner with him. 

It’s the Wanderer. 

He’s a phantom, dressed in a black robe, but Will knows it’s him. He holds Will’s hand in his, smothering them with blood, and Will tries to scream, pulling away but can’t even when he realizes whose blood is on his hands. 

Gladys. 

She’s lying across the counter, eyes gouged out and tongue on a plate that sits on her chest. 

He wakes up screaming, voice hoarse, and something compels him to look at the news. 

THE WANDERER KILLS WAITRESS

Will reads the words, eyes wide, and feels like he can’t breathe. 

Gladys Harlow, aged 66, found dead at the Pit Stop Diner. 

He stares at his hands, and though he knows it’s not there he’s almost sure there’s blood all over them. 

“He’s here,” he whimpers, hands over his mouth as tears fall down his cheeks. 

Hannibal’s voice echoes in Will’s mind as he curls in a fetal position, shaking so badly he can’t hold the phone in his hands. 

“Let him in and see what happens. You may be surprised.” 

Also at: AU-gust Writing Challenge 2023 - Chapter 16: Road Trip

[beantothemax]

[continued from previous ask]

The last part is a name that has been scratched out to the point of illegibility

Praem thinks that last part to herself, before the dread sinks in

“Blood split upon this stone” “Break the razor”

She doesn’t have the time to feel the abject horror of that when she hears a blade drawn behind her

“No more lies, Praem. What did you bring me here for?”

Ekaterina has the tip of her rapier at the back of Praem’s neck

She is pissed.

“I know you knew about it. You recognized the dagger in Macbergen, and the description of the waterfall in Millheart. Why are you lying to me?”

“Listen, there has been some kind of misunderstanding here, if you would simply let me expl-”

“Why are you still lying?”

A pause.

“This is about when we first met. You’ve been lying to me even since then.”

“I-”

“I knew it. I had my suspicions, but never anything like this, Blade of Mist.”

“Why go through the trouble if only to kill me?”

“I thought we were friends.”

“Ekaterina, please! You must listen to me!”

“I think I’ve had enough of your lies. This ends here.”

Ekaterina lunges for Praem’s throat, but not before Praem sees it coming

She parries it easily, just like the traps that came before

With the dagger.

She didn’t even realise what weapon she went for.

Ekaterina laughs. “And that must be my murder weapon. Charming, truly. Was the seer in on your ruse as well?”

Praem sheaths the dagger and draws her sword.

The Fourth Boss: Ekaterina Raszio

The battle opens with Praem pleading Ekaterina to listen to her. She does not respond.

Ekaterina opens with two actions per turn and will increase that number by one after every break

She is a fencer, a defensive duelist; most of her actions have the ability to shield her or trigger counterattacks

Her first action of the fight will always raise her defense and give her two charges of a counterattack ability, similar to Predictive Parry

Her AI will focus aggressively on Praem, and most of her attacks are single-target, so it’s very likely that Praem will go down at some point during the fight

Praem reaching zero HP triggers a dialogue sequence where Ekaterina asks the party members directly why “they’ve chosen to ally themselves with this witch. You needn’t fight on her side.”

Reviving her will also trigger dialogue, where Ekaterina realises that reaching out to the party is pointless

Once she reaches 50% health, the following message appears on the screen: “Ekaterina is going for the kill!”, permanently boosting her physical attack and speed, as well as unlocking a few skills

One of her nastier skills unlocked by this is Disarming Strike, which, you guessed it, removes the target’s currently equipped weapon until the end of the fight

Another is Armourpiercer, which ignores the physical defense bonus granted by the armour and shield the target has equipped

And if you haven’t been dealing good damage to her but have been breaking her a lot, she probably has four actions at this point

This boss is Hard

Also she’s probably got some of the better AI in the game (up there with Catena), and will go after your support-capable characters after Praem is good and dealt with

One fun interaction is that if her counterattack ability is active, if a warrior with Predictive Parry active hits her, the two will bounce counterattacks back and forth until one runs out of charges

It can make for a good way to open up physical attacks against her again, but it also means risking a Lot of damage against the target. Use with discretion.

Before entering Boost Mode, Ekaterina will always use the skill Master’s Eyes, which lowers the party’s defense for three turns

The subsequent Boost Mode displays the message “Ekaterina has shifted her weight”, which is followed by the attack Master’s Flurry, attacking random party members with a grand total of seven sword attacks

Please note that your defense will be lowered before this attack comes in. Good luck :)

Overall I wish I had more to say about this (because good lord I had a lot to say about Sir Eldroy, so I can’t even use the excuse of this only being a chapter 4 boss)

I ABSOLUTELY ADORE EKATERINA’S BOSS FIGHT..,,,,,.,,. THE MOVES WHERE SHE ACTUALLY DISARMS YOU AND GETS RID OF YOUR WEAPONS oR IGNORES YOUR ARMOR,,,,, ASKING THE PARTY WHY THEY BOTHER TO STICK WITH HER AFTER SHE FALLS,,,,,, AND CLASHING COUNTERATTACKS UNTIL SOMEONE RUNS OUT OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[julia-catilina]

Boot Camp Stories

What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.

Many years ago, before the fall of Garlemald…

On the final day of bootcamp, Julia truly felt like she was ready to take on the world. She stood before the full body mirror in the barracks locker room, admiring her form. Her arms were brought up and the woman flexed her biceps with a toothy grin. Not only did she feel like she could take on the world, she looked it as well. Her hair was styled into a short bob, the bangs tucked away from her eyes. The woman’s body was rife with fresh muscle, drilled into her body by long days and hard work. The door to the locker flew open as the other recruits started to file in. They all drifted over to their lockers and started getting ready for bed. Several of them wandered over to the sinks to wash their faces and brush their teeth while the others changed out of their dirty fatigues and into clean pajamas. Julia dropped her arms down to her side as one of her friends approached her. Sentia was a beautiful woman, aiming to enter the Empire’s research and development division. She had the smarts and the wits to solve almost any problem, something that was very attractive to Julian. She watched as the dark skinned woman thumped her fist against Julia’s back playfully. “Looking at yourself in the mirror again?” Sentia teased. “Someone’s gotta admire me,” Julia replied without looking back at her friend, instead looking at her via the mirror. “If you were half as ugly as you are, your confidence would be wildly unattractive. But you’re a total babe so I guess if no one else is going to check you out, might as well be yourself.” “She ain’t that hot!” shouted a male recruit with a cocky smirk. “My girl back home could beat Jules in a beauty contest any day.” “Oh please,” Julia shouted back, looking at the recruit in the mirror. “We all know I’m the best looking girl here.” “Yeah, you are,” said a gruffy large recruit, easily twice the size of Julia. He sauntered into the locker room with a towel wrapped around his waist, having just come out of the bathing area. His body was still moist from his time in the shower and it glistened in the lighting of the room. Julia had to admit, the guy was pretty handsome and easy on the eyes but his personality was the biggest turn off in the world. Despite his good looks, his hands on approach to flirting was eventually going to cost him his job. The large recruit, simply known as Giant, lived up to his name. Having already been a big man prior to basic training, he only managed to grow bigger as the weeks flew by. When he wasn’t training with the other recruits he was hitting the gym hard, spending all his free time there working out. Julia was jealous of his gains, wishing she was capable of packing on muscle mass like him. She knew he had a reputation of being a jackass, but that didn’t seem to bother her. He hadn’t done or said anything to piss her off quite yet, but his off handed comments on Sentia’s body came close. Upon meeting on the first day, Julia and Sentia were practically drawn to each other. They hit it off almost immediately and were quick to become friends. A few of the other recruits thought they were screwing on the side, but they couldn’t have been more wrong. While Sentia was a beautiful woman, Julia didn’t see her like that. What she saw when she looked at her friend was a strong and smart woman ready to take on the world. Julia shook her heard and cleared away the thoughts that had drawn her focus away from reality. She smiled at her own reflection before turning away and walking over to her locker. The door was cracked open after the lock was disengaged, revealing not only Julia’s dress uniform but also her pajamas. She quickly peeled off her dirty fatigues and stuffed them at the bottom of the locker, knowing she’ll never be wearing that set of filthy clothing ever again.

With graduation tomorrow, Julia had never felt more proud of herself. This was the first time she had actually set out to do something and actually finished. She knew, in the back of her mind, that if her parents were both alive this day they would be proud as well. The thought made Julia frown a little as she slipped on a white tank top and a pair of black shorts. She let out a yawn before closing her locker door and turning away from it, only to see Giant walking past Sentia and slapping her rear as he passed.

Sentia let out a yelp and frowned, rubbing where she had been smacked with one hand, the other balled into a fist. Julia could tell that she wanted to deck Giant, but knew that he was much bigger and stronger than her and doing so would most likely result in a serious injury. But Julia wasn’t scared of him like Sentia was.

“Oi, Giant!” Julia shouted as the grumpy man placed his hand on the door leading out of the lockers. He looked back at her with a scowl.

“What do you want?” he barked.

“You need to stop touching the female recruits,” Julia told him.

“I ain’t stoppin’ shit. Not like you’re gonna stop me,” came the man’s reply.

“Fucking pig.”

“The fuck you call me, little girl? I ought to mess up that pretty face of yours,” snarled Giant as he stormed over to Julia, hands balled into fists.

“I called you a pig,” Julia said as she squared up with Giant.

The two bumped chests together, Giant grunting as he thrust his chest forward and almost knocked the smaller woman over. She planted both her feet down on the ground, planting herself firming in place. Giant smirked and went to chest bump her again, only to get hit in the face with a left hook he hadn’t seen coming.

Giant barely registered the blow as he slowly looked down at Julia with a glare that could melt glass. His fists tightened and Julia could hear his knuckles cracking from the strain. She took in a deep breath and punched twice, once with her right hand and the second with the left before delivering a nasty uppercut. The beast of a man actually stumbled backward a couple feet at the last strike, his rage visible on his face.

“I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you, girl,” Giant bellowed.

Around them the rest of the recruits encircled the pair as they started trading blows. As he was much bigger than her, Giant’s fists were like getting hit with a truck. So Julia did her best to step out of the way of his brutish attacks. The first couple blows stung like a motherfucker, but that wasn’t enough to deter Julia from taking this giant down, even if it meant getting her own ass kicked.

Giant roared with fury and threw a jab right at the center of Julia’s face. She took the blow like a champion, hearing her nose crunch and break from the blow. Stumbling backward, Julia reached up and touched her nose, coming back with blood smeared fingers. At the sight of her own blood Julia doubled down on her own fury.

With his size advantage, Julia had to rely entirely on her quick wits and speed to make it out in one piece. When Giant threw a punch, she ducked under it and triple punched the same spot on his ribs with dull thumps. The man showed no indication of slowing down, so Julia redoubled her efforts. From this point on Julia’s focus was that singular spot she had punched thrice so far.

A giant fist plowed into her gut and Julia felt all of the wind rush out of her body. She doubled over and gripped her stomach with both hands while she struggled to breathe. Taking advantage of her weakened state, Giant reached down and grabbed her by the throat. He hoisted her off the ground and took hold of her with two hands, wrapping them around her neck tightly. It felt as if he was trying to kill her, so Julia responded in kind.

Her arms flailed around until her right hand took hold of a handle used to open and close the lockets. She pulled with all of her might and ended up ripping the handle clean off the door, breaking the screws that had been used to secure it in place. The handle was then used as a makeshift shank, the weapon driven into Giant several times before he eventually released her. The much bigger man looked confused as to why he was bleeding so much, one giant hand reaching down to touch the spot where he had been stabbed. His hand came back smeared in blood, the sight of which only enraged him further.

Knowing this was her one and only chance, Julia threw herself from the floor and onto Giant, tackling him to the ground. The two hit the ground hard and the crowd around them loosened up to make room for the fight. She gripped him by the hair and started to slam his head against the ground as hard as she could, roaring with fury as she did so.

Eventually Giant stopped moving and resisting so Julia climbed off the man, gasping for air. She looked around at the others and Sentia practically threw herself at Julia, wrapping her arms around the woman’s neck. It looked as if she were about to kiss her savior, but it was then that the officer assigned to their unit stepped into the lock room, having heard the commotion.

“LINE UP RECRUITS!” the man bellowed, his voice echoing in the confined space.

Everyone in the room, aside from Giant, shut up and did as they were told. They all formed a single file line and stood at attention, their gazes locked onto the drill sergeant. The group watched as he dipped down to check the vitals of Giant, looking directly at Julia as he did so.

“Explain yourself, recruit,” the man told Julia, keeping his hand on Giant’s neck.

“He was touching another recruit, Sir! I was doing my duty to my comrades by defending her, sir!” Julia replied, going with the truth right away.

“Bullshit,” the man snarled as he rose from his squat and stormed over to Julia. He drew her face closer to hers, so close she could smell his breath. “A little girl like you took down this giant? Who else helped her?”

“No one, sir!” the entire group shouted in perfect unison.

“I was hoping that was the case,” the sergeant muttered as he took a step back from Julia. “Recruit Catilina, you are to come with me and report to my superiors. You have been summoned.”

Julia’s face paled as she heard the words come out of the sergeant’s mouth, but did as she was told. She stepped out of formation and nodded once at her commanding officer, blood running down her face from her shattered nose. Without so much as an afterthought she reached up and set her nose back into place, grimacing at the pain that followed.

“Good luck, my guardian angel!” Sentia managed to get out before the two left the locker room, smiling at her friend while the others gathered up Giant to drag him to medical.

------

Julia was taken to the main building on the training base and seated in a room with no windows and just a single door leading in and out. A metal table sat between two steel chairs bolted to the floor. Sitting at one end of the table was a man she had never seen before, a man who reeked of cigarettes.

“Have a seat,” the man said without looking up from his paperwork.

Julia did as she was instructed and eased herself into the only free chair. She reached down and took hold of her shirt and used it to dab the blood off her face, despite the fact that her nose was still bleeding from a gash that ran across it. The man eventually looked up and saw her doing this and a smile spread across her lips. His paperwork was abandoned and the folder closed, the man turning his full attention on Julia.

“Typically when a recruit almost kills another they are removed from service. But you… You took out a man twice your size with nothing but your wits and a small shank. You’ve got balls, girl.”

“I was just doing my duty to my comrades, sir,” Julia told him.

“I know what happened,” the man said calmly.

“How, sir? It just happened a few minutes ago?”

“I work with the Frumentarii. We see everything,” the man told Julia.

Her face paled and cold sweat ran down her spine as she stared at the man who could not only end her career but her life if he so chose. She had heard stories of Frumentarii agents and their handiwork. They were a group of people who could make someone disappear with little to no effort. Why were they here for her? Was what she did really that bad?”

“W-why are you talking to me?” Julia asked after a moment of stunned silence. “All I did was kick the ass of a jackass.”

“Oh, you needn’t worry about Giant anymore,” the man said with a wide grin.

“Did I kill him?”

“Hah! As if. No, sexual assault is taken very seriously here. He has been removed from active duty and will be dishonorably discharged after he spends some time in the slammer.”

“Then what about me, sir?”

“You? I want you to work for me,” the man said, that grin never leaving his features.

“Can I at least have your name, sir?” Julia asked, her posture perfect now that she knew she was sitting before someone who could end her career.

“Decimus Eir Panthera,” he told her. “Now, why don’t we have a little talk, hm?”

“What about, sir?”

“You! You’re top of your class and scored great on your tests. You work really well with others and you’re very intuitive. Your fellow recruits speak very highly of you. We could use someone like you in the Frumentarii.”

“I’m in,” Julia said without thinking.

“Wow, that was easy,” Decimus said after a burst of laughter. “Very well then, Julia. I’m going to start by assigning you a call sign.”

“A call sign, sir?”

“A nickname we use over the radio for operational security. You’ll be briefed on everything when we get back to headquarters. Welcome to the Frumentarii, Guardian Angel.”

[glassmarcus]

Bayonetta 3: Devil May Cry's Shadow Remains Cast

*Played in November 2022, Written in December 2022. Holy Shit, I was pissed off when I wrote this.

The first Bayonetta was pretty damn good. Combat was slick, the attack list seemed endless, the music was hot, you could hold ZR to simultaneously break dance and shoot people, and each level had this cinematic flavor to it. Bayonetta was a game with personality and despite its roots to the Devil May Cry Franchise, it was truly one of a kind. It had problems with egregious Quick Time Events and drawn out mini games, but coming back to it after a decade of character action releases, I'm still impressed with the enemy design quality and how brutal yet earned the ranking system is. The core gameplay is tight and the flourishes of personality are icing on the cake. Bayonetta was a fun character to watch and control, and really put the stylish in the stylish action genre.

Bayonetta 2 is pretty damn good as well. It looks far better than Bayonetta 1 and runs smoother to boot. While the first game was plagued with bad mini games and quick time events, this game irons that stuff out and is mostly just combat, the thing we primarily come to these games for. Everything is streamlined in Bayonetta 2. There's nothing stopping you from having fun. You can use your Umbran Climax to solve any situation, you can avoid Sega arcade homages (for the most part), you aren’t penalized for using items really, you can still hold ZR to break dance, and the game won't kill or punish you for unfair reasons. But I feel like it loses a lot by taking this approach. Achieving Platinum ranks is less satisfying and it feels less cinematic as well due to how homogenized the experience is. There’s no changes in pace, just consistent gameplay that never really reaches the heights of it’s predecessor. Bayonetta 2 is smoother, but is also far less memorable. Because of this, I could never decide which one was better.

Bayonetta 3 was the perfect chance to find a balance between the first two games and become the best of them all. And it... doesn't even attempt to do this. It goes in an entirely different trajectory, creating undeniable peaks, but also brand new problems. In terms of raw gameplay I think this is the best game of the trilogy with a few reservations. It doesn't run as well as them due to its eyes being bigger than the Nintendo Switch’s stomach. The aesthetic and mechanical design of the enemies pales in comparison to the ones in previous games. But the options you are given in combat are substantially varied and those mini games and set pieces are all fine at worst and a wonderful palette cleansers at best. Aside from that Big the Cat ditch digging mini game. That was pretty bad.

Bayonetta 3 is not just a sequel to Bayonetta 2. It's somewhat of a spiritual sequel to Astral Chain in its combat philosophy. I’d say the combat is the perfect blend between the two. Astral Chain had simpler and slower combat than most titles developed by Platinum Games, but had the widest variance of moves you could pull off within a single fight. There are 15 combinations of move sets you can freely switch between, each with their own advantages and draw backs, and you are encouraged to play that way. You technically play as two characters, so the move sets aren't as cohesive as most action games, but the moves themselves never blend together and always have a functional clarity to them.

The first two Bayonettas are no strangers to having move set combinations. You are able to equip two weapons at a time, one Bayonetta can use for her hands and one for her feet. You can mix and match the weapons to create a custom arsenal which you can equip up to two of at a time. It’s less than the 15 in Astral Chain, but those 2 move sets have a ton of depth on their own. And while you do need to pause the game to select them, you do have dozens of potential combinations at your disposal. You can set up around 36 unique move sets in the first game and 56 in the second. That's an insane tool box to hand players and I have to respect it.

Unfortunately I feel the provided depth isn't that accessible and feels unnecessary a lot of the time. You can build a ton of stuff with it and even switch between move sets mid combo, but I never felt the need to do any of that in the 60 hours I spent playing the first one. Each weapon you get in Bayonetta has a long list of button inputs you use to pull off a different attack, but many of those attacks feel functionally the same and not worth learning once you understand a few effective strings. It’s far more important to learn the universal moves you buy throughout the adventure.

Bayonetta 3 has abandoned the mixing and matching and has adopted the two character approach. Only this time, your core abilities are on par with as any individual Bayonetta move set. You still get to control your second character with its own abilities which are more complex than the ones in Astral Chain. Minor note: the second character is a Kaiju. Bayonetta 3 meets a compromise. 6 combinations you can access without pausing, but each combination is deeper than either game and within the menu, you can equip 156 move sets. There's not quite as much sauce for Bayonetta herself, but there's more variety than ever before. Because the summons and weapons are so disjointed, each one has more mechanical diversity because they don't have to fit into the same frame work. They use the same inputs for the universal moves, but those inputs have way more variance in their output. They all have spin attacks, stingers, launchers, and triple jumps, but you never quite know the additional elements of these moves. Before I could divide weapons into 3 categories: arm weapons, feet weapons, or weapons that can go on either limb. Now I'd say there are no weapon types aside from the gun and not gun. Each weapon is it’s own thing and because of that, they are more interesting to use.

Variety is what Bayonetta 3 is all about. It is loaded with gameplay flavors. Shifting in controls, visual styles, and goals is just the way it rolls. I've seen a lot of people say this is a bad thing, making it harder to replay if you just want combat. While I can sympathize, it doesn't bother me all that much really. You can just skip past them like you could in Astral Chain and once you get 1 platinum rank on it, you never have to play it ever again. It’s a bit annoying on your first playthrough if you aren’t a fan. While the grading isn't as harsh as I’d like it to be, I do appreciate this replay system due to how much time it saves. And I get that some people just don't want the alternate gameplay styles at all, but I feel like a big part of Bayonetta is weird variety and this game has that in spades.

If I wanted a solid game where I just fight, I’d play Devil May Cry 5 because it's the best at being that. In a lot of ways Bayo 3 ends up feeling like a lesser DMC5 and gets lost in it’s enormous shadow, but having weird set pieces around every bend really sets it apart. Bayonetta 3 is the best at giving you a buffet in which every dish is decent and the main entrees are delectable. The breadth this game has to offer cannot be understated. There's even multiple characters to play as and they're....fine. Jeanne's levels are fine at least. Harmless I'd say because they take like 20 minutes of the total play time. Viola's are good once you get used to controlling her and come to terms with how Bayonetta is simply a better character to play. I started really enjoying the interplay between her armed and unarmed gameplay...and then the game kinda ends. I like Viola. I love her attitude. I love her cringe. And her theme song fucking shreds. My issue with the variety in Bayonetta 3 isn’t that there's too much and that none of it is good, but that some of it should be more fleshed out.

And then there's the level design which I think clenches why I prefer 3 from a design perspective. The past games felt cramped and cheap. The first game reuses a lot of map assets and a lot of the middle levels feel the same as the beginning ones. The levels themselves were often plagued with rough platforming and cramped space. The cramped space isn't an issue at all when trying to just play the game like a normal human being. But when they try to hide secrets, they run out of places to logically put them. This means you need to back track in order for the secrets to appear. It is a gross display of truly unhinged level craft. 2 has less of it, but it's still there. This most recent take on level design solves all of this. Worlds change drastically in aesthetic every 3 chapters so you never get tired of the stage flavor and the maps are more open and vertical. This gives opportunities to hide secrets in spots that require exploring new areas. The placement of these bonuses also force you to learn the movement mechanics granted by each weapon, making reaching them feel earned. And during replays (or just the first playthrough really, no one is forcing you to explore honestly), you can just B-line to the critical path like the other games. While the levels are wider, they aren’t much longer. The rewards for the secrets are also far better now. Instead of unlocking bonus features when finding Umbran Animals, you get actual new side levels which give their own rewards that end up being substantial.

So as far as gameplay goes, it clears the other two for me. It’s not quite a vertical improvement, but it feels kinda marketed towards me. Bayonetta 1 still has the most solid combat due to enemies attacking you from off screen the least. Bayonetta 2 takes it on an aesthetic and performance level easily. But 3 just tries so many things that I end up liking. I’m a fan of Astral Chain because it made it very easy to do a plethora of actions that required your brain to be in two separate places at once. Pulling off a tag team attack with your stand was satisfying in a way that doing a fat combo wasn't. And in Bayonetta 3, you can do both. There was no way I wouldn't be a huge fan of it. I ultimately had an absolute blast playing this….But good lord does it get dragged down in terms of character, narrative, and general vibes.

Much like how this game handles its tone, this review is about to take a drastic shift, Spoilers ahead, not that you should care about that.

This story is really bad. Nothing is explained clearly, no motivations are stated, people don't communicate like real humans, crucial details are presented as optional. It's nonsense. Bayonetta 3 refuses to linger on any details and denies the player any semblance of certainty. Everything in this narrative is fluid. Things just sort of happen and it doesn't matter how little sense it makes or stupid it feels, you just have to accept it. You can argue that the previous games were pretty bad too and only existed to drive the next set piece, but they still drove them. They got you to where you needed to go. I still understood the general plot points of those stories. Bayonetta 3 envelops the essence of 9 year old me, slamming my toys and stuffed animals together, imagining a story around it on the fly. Only it's less excusable here because this game has 4 writers and I am certain not a single one of them were in elementary school. Why are there no meaningful exchanges or reactions between characters? Why did the villain do anything he did? What the fuck is a fairy in this context? Who the hell is Dark Eve? Why did Bayonetta fail every single perception check she was tasked with? So many questions, most of them probably answered in the in-game data books I refuse to read through. This isn't Dark Souls and even Dark Souls is structured so that you can understand it without external reading. Because its plot is simple and makes sense. While this plot is neither of those things.

But I don't play Bayonetta for the story, I play Bayonetta for the personality. I play it to see cool characters do over the top things. I play it to see wacky dances in the middle of tense situations. I play it because I want to see a confident dominatrix make everyone around her look pathetic. The third entry kinda fumbles that last point. The character of Luka basically exist for Bayonetta to tease and belittle. Luka tries to act cool, and fails in the presence of a character who is actually cool, and then gets sent off to babysitter duty. That's what their dynamic was in past games. I'm not just upset they end up together at the end, and I’m not just upset the romance wasn't competently built up. I'm upset that their dynamic is that of equals, as Luka is presented as an extremely important figure here. Bayonetta... overtly respects Luka. It makes me sick. We don't need that shit. Bayonetta and Rodin are equals. Bayonetta and Jeanne are equals. If they are truly meant to be together throughout space and time, Luka should be the M to Bayonetta's S. But in 3, he's kinda just a cool confident guy who is a bit clumsy sometimes and also Faerie Jesus I guess. Why in the world does the story frame them as being soul mates across dimensions? He's just some dude. I can even get behind Viola being their love child. Them having sex eventually, in another universe, seems very plausible. But this "I don’t know what I would do without you" crap is a step too far.

Bayonetta is as representative of an independent woman as you can get. Yet she is assigned her corporate mandated male lover right at the end because someone needs to protect her. This run of the mill dorky guy getting the girl way out of his league shtick is something we've seen thousands of times and its deeply upsetting to see Bayonetta helplessly veer in that direction. It makes her so...ordinary. She's supposed to be one of a kind. Yet this game goes out of its way to make her relatively basic. In previous games she has sadistic fun with what she does. It's shown frequently in the cutscenes and the torture attacks. She feels in control at nearly all times. Here, it has dialed back those tendencies and makes torture attacks instant. She has a much weaker dominatrix aura now and that was a huge part in what made Bayonetta such a genius power fantasy. You get to play a hot woman exerting her twisted will on hideous beings. That's the dream! Bayonetta getting ousted to the Hetero-normative Malbolge is a fucking nightmare.

Mask off: If Luka was a girl I'd probably roll my eyes 50% less. I would still think it's bad, but at the very least it shows that queer people can have terribly developed romances as well and I think that's important for today's youth to understand.

It all feels a bit soulless at times. Exciting moments occur, but the context around them is meaningless. Things pop off and you want to indulge in the action movie schlock, but then it does whatever it can to undercut that moment. Everything in this game is punctuated by gritty deaths or intensely unfunny slapstick. When the game wants to be serious it chickens out and decides to be goofy. When the game wants to be fun, it dumps all over the party with the most downer shit possible. When tragedies are occurring, you're expected to cheer for over the top action. Bayonetta 3 is a playable Modern Action Movie. All Bayonetta Games are like this. But the Modern Action Movies of today are dissimilar to the Modern Action Movies of the 2000s.

It adopts the same bathos that has been plaguing the movie industry for years. It’s allergic to being sincere for too long despite the actual events being pretty dire. It undercuts it’s own plot constantly til the very end. Then presents itself as if it has any value. You DID have value Bayonetta 3. And then you grated at it, bit by bit, until all that was left were bitter shavings of quality sanded down by a coarse veneer of self apathy. Bayonetta 3 feels like it doesn't have pride in itself. It has self image issues. It wants to be DMC 5. It wants to be Astral Chain 2. It wants to be a billion dollar grossing Marvel movie. But it doesn't want to be Bayonetta. It almost gets away with these insecurities in terms of gameplay alone. But the narrative just whisper screams: “we don't actually like Bayonetta that much if we're gonna be real”. That's why you see every iteration of her die. That's she's as milquetoast as she's ever been. That's why they hand down the torch to Viola, a character they couldn't even bother making the dueteragonist. She had the potential to represent all the neurosis the game seems to have, yet she couldn’t even amount to that.

I didn't expect my feelings on the story to be so strong. I didn't really care for the first game's story, but I just kind of accepted it. It didn't have to be good to add to the game. It gave context and ample excuses for the cool stuff I wanted to see and gave the characters room to show who they were. Bayonetta 3 provided context which actively detracts from my enjoyment. I can still replay it and ignore it, but it’s tainted. I play Bayonetta 3 the same way I re-watch How I Met Your Mother, with a charitable lens that doesn't help when the bullshit piles up at the end of the story. The game is still good, but I don't like it as much because it pissed me off to this degree. Which is why I struggle to put this on the same pedigree as the other Bayonetta games. I will if pressed, but it gets by on a technicality just by being "mechanically interesting" to me. It feels like this was made into a Bayonetta game just so that the franchise could have another winner. It's a ringer. I beat it and got a strange feeling that I couldn't place at the time, but now I can. Bayo 3 hustled me. Bayonetta 3 dawn's the masquerade of a Bayonetta game and plays the role so well that we have no choice but to believe it. But you might be keen enough to spot the true difference between it and it's fore bearers. Because of all the story, character and major gameplay decisions this game makes, none of them disqualify it from being a true sequel other than this:

You can't hold ZR to break dance in this game.

[asoulofatlantis]

The game basically telling us Vita will be back as on Anguis eventually...

Duvalie and McBurn as well.

And this is the game telling you that you are to exspect Cedric to be still babysitted by Shirley next time we see them... not that I am complaining XD

And now we are ready for Riveri! I am looking forward to playing the localized version of it.

A few more words about CS4 tho.

What I can certainly say about this game, is that it isn’t exactly the best among them and after CS2, probably the worst of the overall Cold Steel Saga. The first half of the game was exhausting if nothing else and often annoying. The reasoning behind new Class7 being pushed was stupid at best. The game had any chance to use better explanations that weren’t putting original class7 in a bad place, but they chose to do otherwise, which was not exactly an intelligent move. Especially not when you are more fond of original class7 and less fond of new class7. I think that was overall an issue of this game too. Despite the fact that new class7 was constantly forced on you, they failed you take them time to make you grow more fond of the characters, you hardly see any character development from them (Altina aside) throughout the game - which can granted be do to not much time passing in this game, but as they didn’t feel as likeable in CS3 already as they should have, CS4 should have put more effort into making them more likeable. Instead, we get Juna absolutely disrespecting original Class7 and their feelings or situation while they are all mourning the less of their friends and family members. Kurt might have faced Cedric in the end, but it never felt like a real conclusion for them, given that Cedric ran away and Kurts purpose and role is still as lost as it was before and so is the one he wanted to be close friends with. Musse did return to Class7, but it was not like she really wanted to leave in the first place, she managed her plan and then went back to desperately search for an alternative because she didn’t like her own plan and to top that off, her whole calculation-power that was put so high at first turned out to be nothing but a lot of luck, given the many events in this game alone that she could not foresee that could or would have turned the tides quite a lot. Ash has come back to new class7 fairly fast as well but if anything, he is the one of them who actually grew a bit, as he understood his own mistakes and was feeling remorse and all that and you can see with him that he is a bit more honest with himself and about his feelings. The growth everyone claimed new class7 went through, is only truly visible in him. Altina is a different story of course, but Altina was different already in CS3, simply because we knew her from CS2 and her evolution since then took some time and some heartbreak and so was only truly visible after we lost Millium. However, her strong attachment to Rean stayed the same all the while, just like Musses annoying and agressive flirting with Rean. So since no one really moved forward, despite the game trying to make you think they did, it is hard to change your mind about them. I mean... why should you? New class7 aside, there are some plot holes, weird plot points and some other questionable choices in the game that also make it harder to bear. For example: In the beginning it is said Agate is missing later he is just there and no one comments about it. And why do we talk about the taste of ale? Did we really have to play a card-game AND some crossbellian-version of Tetris as a minigame? (Yes, you don’t have to do them, but there are waiting great rewards for you, useful rewards, IF you manage to find and win against all the players...) Did we really need all those bathing-scenes? ^^’ To be fair tho, CS4 has some of the greatest moments and scenes in the Cold Steel Saga. And as I have said time and time again, no game has ever drawn that many (and strong) emotions from me. Be it being really pissed off about Junas behavior at the beginning, being proud of how far certain characters have come, being happy to be reunited with some of the characters or the immense joy upon seeing the golden ending. Also some sadness here and there, of course, given how we face the deaths of Rutger and some others - so much about nobody dying in this game.

So I guess in the end. This game is slightly better then mediocre good.

But it has Rean and it has Class7 and Olivert and Erebonia and Shirley and I am pretty sure I will return to this game once more eventually. Although I have to admit I need a longer break from it this time. I feel like I played this game every year for 3 years now and its not good enough to replay it every year ^^’

Our next curse of action will be beginning the Remake of stories of seasons “A wonderful life” and interrupting it to play through riveri.

In the meantime, I will play some of my lazy games. Like Sims 4, Universim, Two Point Campus maybe or Planet Zoo.

See you soon!