#I got a new toy and just sorta felt like it | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

totalrager · 2 months ago

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Bill prefers a more hands-on approach when it comes to gaming.

cw: set between late 90s/early 2000s, fem!reader, r is not a #gamergirl for plot purposes, ooc to the max bc bill isn’t allowed within 50 feet of the opposite sex :P

Nailed to the wooden door, painted in bold, red letters, is a giant sign that reads ‘NO GIRLS ALLOWED’.

“You break a single thing in here, and I’ll call the cops, I swear to god.”

“Great, anything else?"

“Touch my comics, and you’re dead.”

The threat rolls off your shoulders as quickly as he said it.

It’s been like this ever since you walked through the front door.

After getting a call, at 2 a.m. might you add, Bill had been real adamant about you coming over; something about his usual visitors being 'too busy doing other stupid bullshit' and wanting to show off his mad skills at a new game he'd purchased.

Had you not been on the verge of falling back asleep, you would've called him on his shit and made him admit that he really just wanted to see you.

Regardless, and in hopes of putting an end to the semi-rantish call, you said yes.

Bill, having finally gone through his extensive rule list and coming close to having you sign a contract, unlocks the wooden door and pushes it open; the worn-out stairs squeak loudly as the two of you make your descent into the dark room.

As if it were second nature, he felt around in the air for a moment before yanking on a dangling cord. The only source of light reveals his magnum opus.

The basement was exactly as you pictured it.

Hanging on almost every wall that didn't have a giant bookshelf pushed in front of it, several shelves were bearing multiple miniature knick-knacks and large posters featuring what you assumed was every single sci-fi movie to have ever existed.

Towards one of the corners of the room was a beat-up table covered in a fictional map, surrounded by over a dozen mini figurines; a battle having clearly taken place the night before.

But what stuck out to you the most was that it was noticeably clean.

Y'know, for a guy.

Aside from the clutter of personal belongings that bordered on a novice level of hoarding, there was not a single speck of dust.

No crumpled papers, bits of plastic, fast food wrappers, or anything. You could be mistaken, but you’re almost positive he vacuumed, too; Hell, even the tiny waste basket shoved next to the couch was empty.

Was this all because you were coming over? Did he want to make a good impression?

The thought alone sends your guts aflutter with some bizarre version of flattery.

As your gaze flits all around the room, you feel a heat radiating from your host’s laser-focused gaze aimed directly at your face.

“What?”

“You look… different.”

Okay, so what if you actually put some effort into your appearance, doused yourself in your favorite perfume, and put on your nicest pair of jeans?

It’s not like you wanted to look somewhat decent for the guy you were maybe-kinda-sorta seeing or anything; even if said guy couldn’t give any less of a damn about how you looked.

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” You shrug nonchalantly, hoping he wouldn’t see through your thinly-veiled ruse, “I always look like this. Are you just now paying attention?”

God only knows the amount of ridicule the little weasel’d dogpile you with if he found out you got all ‘prettified’ just for him.

Plus, his ego would over-inflate to unprecedented levels and take out all mankind like a modern-day version of the meteor that ended the reign of dinosaurs.

Luckily, with one last eye flicker and a low, noncommittal ‘hm’ from the back of his throat, the brief subject is dropped.

Guess you both did some light primping.

He moves further into the room, not before throwing back a witty 'You should take a picture; it'll last longer.'.

“I can’t help it; it’s not every day my pookie bear lets me into his holy sanctum to play with his little toys.” You flutter your eyelashes at him, earning a disturbed sneer in return.

“Don’t call me that.”

“What? Pookie bear?” you feign innocence.

“Yes, that. Only pussywhipped normies use that cutesie crap and I refuse to subject myself to such standards.”

“Whatever you say, snookums.”

“I so loathe you.” Bill let out one last aggravating sigh before busying himself with the gaming system he’d mentioned over the phone.

As he connects a couple of wires to his TV, you awkwardly hang around for something more to do, settling on picking at a hang nail just to have something to busy your hands with.

The solution comes when you make eye contact with a nearby shelf, a couple of out-of-box action figures practically beckoning you over.

“Ooh! What if we each grabbed one and made them kiss and junk? Wouldn’t that be romantic?”

You snag a figure that had a very Baywatch David Hasselhoff-y vibe with puffier hair and a gun strapped to his hip and deepen your voice, holding it up close to Bill, “Listen to the chick, punk. She’s got the right idea.”

A certain lasso-handling heroine is also thrown into the mix as you adjust your tone to be more smooth and confident.

“I agree, Please help me declare my undying love for…” You pause for a moment in an attempt to recall the gunslinger’s name, “that guy.”

Bill scoffs 'unamusingly' at your childish display and (lightly) swats the hand holding the intergalactic smuggler away from his face, “Like Han Solo would ever be caught dead making out with a woman who wears her panties out in public to fight crime.”

“Pssh, He’d be lucky if Wonder Woman even glanced in his general direction.”

He pauses, “How do you know who Wonder Woman is?”

“Can’t tell you; it’ll take the mystery out of our relationship.” (You thumbed through a stack of comics when he wasn’t looking.) “Are you going to show me how to play or what?”

As if on cue, the TV’s noisy static blaring through the speakers smoothens out to a more upbeat and inviting tune, making way to display the psychedelic home screen of one Mario Kart 64.

You let out a delighted ‘oooo!’ before plopping down next to your kinda-sorta boyfriend on his circular carpet as he fiddles around with two controllers, ensuring that both are fully functional and cooperating.

Bill messes around with the game select screen, making sure to pick two players before moving on to the character select screen, the more exciting of the two.

There are eight options for you to choose from, ranging from a human plumber to... you want to say a punk dragon with a mohawk?

Before you can make a decision, you're given some unwarranted advice: "You can be peach, obviously."

“Are you saying that because I’m dainty and pretty like her?”

“Uh, no. She’s pink and the only girl.”

As appealing as that sounds, another character had already caught your eye. “Forget that. I want to be the green dino thingy.”

“Yoshi? Out of the question, I already chose him.”

“No way, I want him!”

“No, fuck off! I picked him first!”

“BILL, PLEASEEE!”

“Get off of me!”

———

After the two of you take the time to have a well-rounded and productive discussion ("STOP THROWING CUSIONS AT ME!"), you come to an agreement.

“Whatever, I wanted to be Toad anyway.” He eventually concedes.

A triumphant giggle bubbles past your lips, earning a heatless scowl from Bill, as the game finally, finally begins.

You watch as a quick runthrough of the track displays itself: a hilly, rainbow-y mess set deep in outer space; cartoon logics, who were you to argue.

As the countdown begins and the competitors rev up their engines, a previously forgotten problem makes its way to the forefront of your mind. “Wait- Bill- I don’t know the controls!”

“Can’t help you, gotta win.”

And the race is on!

As he moves freely around the map and plays out maneuvers only capable of being done by someone who already knew every trick in the game, all you managed to do was move forward a couple feet, change the camera angles, and then crash straight into a wall, where you remained until the end of the race as Bill, as expected, effortlessly places first.

To add insult to injury, right before crossing the finish line, one of the last remaining CPUs nails you with a projectile. "Oh, come on!"

He lets out a victorious and annoyingly mocking cackle as the rankings are given, placing you at dead last, right underneath a literal ape.

You jut your bottom lip out in disdain, “Does unfairly beating me make you feel good about yourself, Dickey?”

“It really does. Thanks for asking.”

"Jerk."

"It's not my fault you're so bad at this."

“I am trying my-“ a sudden warmth descends upon you as a pair of flannel-covered arms wrap themselves atop of your own, “-best.”

He’s initiating contact! holy shit, holy shit, don't make any sudden moves or he’ll get spooked. Oh my god!

Bill ‘hand-holding is for douchebags’ Dickey was willingly pulling a slightly less messy version of the pottery scene from Ghost; all in the name of showing you how to play a game meant for kids.

During all this overthinking, he's also pointing out each multi-colored button and its designated purpose.

So it's possible he doesn't consciously realize the very intimate hold he has on your right now.

Oh well, you'll take what you can get.

Is that aftershave you're smelling? Since when has he ever worn that?

“-button to perform slides on turns so you don’t lose any speed, but it’s a move for more advanced players, such as myself, and I doubt you’d be able to do it correctly.”

Wait, how long has he been talking for?

Any sound tumbling out of his mouth sounds exactly like it’s coming from one of the offscreen adults in Peanuts.

"You’re holding it wrong.”

You blink. “W-what other way is there? I don’t have three hands.”

“The controller's only meant to be held by the middle and right part.”

You nearly swallow your tongue as Bill maneuvers your hands, which were getting embarrassingly clammier by the second, into the correct position.

He then chooses another track, one that was covered in cows, and the countdown begins once again.

Except this time, once the little guy on the cloud makes it to one, instead of focusing on winning and jetting off to remain ahead of the other racers, his cart remains at a standstill next to yours. “Okay, press A to go.”

That should be easy enough to find!

One measly little A shouldn’t be an issue.

You stare down at the controller, and a beat of awkward silence hangs thickly in the air.

“Uh...”

Unseen by you, Bill rolls his eyes. “Are you new to the English language? You’re hopeless.”

He presses your thumb down, and by some odd miracle, Yoshi is finally moving forward, this time without hitting any barriers.

Like the world's most annoying teacher, he helps remind you again and again what button serves what purpose, all while keeping his hold on you.

While it initially flustered you, you started to get used to the added heat and focused on actually winning.

When he feels that you've finally got a grasp on the controls, he gives you full-reign of the controller and drops his arms; although, Bill doesn't seem to go too far, simply choosing to hang them loosely around your waist.

You don't think much of it, too preoccupied dodging a few cows whose life mission was to be run over.

"Stupid asshole," you murmur angrily under your breathe as a green plumber bumps into your kart and nearly sends you veering off course.

The race gets even more intense when you finally manage to catch up and riding the red plumber's ass for first.

"Throw it already, he's right fucking there!" Bill encourages, his grip tightening from excitement.

Your arm jerks to the right as if the movement will help Yoshi avoid a banana placed by the unfair CPU racer. "I'm trying, I'm trying!"

"Then throw the damn shell!"

"Stop backseat driving!"

With the checkered finish line in sight, you make the last ditch effort to twart your opponent and toss the green shell.

You both watch with bated breath as it hits the white fences along the sides like the world's most annoying pinball, inching closer and closer to its intended target before it finally makes a-

"Direct hit!"

At the absolute last second, Mario is sent toppling over like the giant tool he is, making a clear path for Yoshi, the ambitious little dinosaur, to take first place.

"I did it!" The wide grin on your face nearly splits your face in two as Yoshi lets out his victory... cheer?

You don't dwell too much on it.

Maneuvering yourself around and then tossing your arms around his neck, you relish in the small, dare you say, proud expression displayed on your boyfriend's face, "Did you see that?"

This time, you can see when he rolls his eyes, "Duh, I was right here."

"How does it feel to be dating someone with better gaming skills than you?"

"Please, I could've played better than that in my sleep."

"Is that a bet I hear, Mr. Dickey?" You twirl a lock of his auburn hair in between your fingers.

You're not sure exactly when it clicks, but the sudden realization of the extremely close proximity he's placed himself in brings an abrupt end to the light teasing between you two.

Bill's entire face turns a brilliantly bright cherry red as he scrambles back over to his side of the floor, accidently knocking you on your ass and stammering the whole way, “T-tell anyone about this and I-I’ll just say you were c-coming onto me.”

Initially, you thought that you accidentally overstepped your boundaries and caused him some grief, knowing how weird he is with physical contact, all of which is thrown out the window when he keeps glancing over at you.

You snicker, "Don't worry, I liked it too."

He sucks his teeth in what you took as dismissal, "whatever."

The tiny smile he's fighting so hard to stamp down says otherwise.

He quietly grabs his controller and returns to the map selection screen, scrolling through the submenus until he finally settles on one.

You take the silent hint and reach for yours, keeping your distance and refocusing on the screen.

As the two of you settle back in, Bill not-so-subtly scooches himself closer to you, tensing slightly when his leg makes contact.

Not wanting to ruin the moment, you just slump further into his side, leaning your head on his shoulder.

It takes every fiber in your body and then some to not squeal in pure ecstasy when he returns the small gesture by squishing his head on top of yours.

"YEAHHH, EAT SHIT!”

“WHEN DID YOU GET A RED SHELL?!”

extra:

"Hey, freak. Have you seen my sewing kit? I got a couple grudges to- what the hell?”

Jane watches in complete shock as the whirlwind formerly known as her brother frantically shoves pile after pile of trash into a large bag.

There’s a couple more just like it in terms of size piled up in the corner; right beside them is a discarded feather duster and a tangled-up vacuum cleaner.

"I didn't touch your shit," Bill calls over his shoulder, "can't you see I'm busy?"

“Since when do you clean?”

Her only answer is a grumbled 'mind your damn business' as her brother proceeds to dump last night's leftover campaign fuel into the overstuffed garbage bag in his tight grasp.

"Is it for a girl? It's a girl, isn't it?"

The younger Dickey takes a moment to soak in the fact that her brother, the selfish bastard that couldn’t bring himself to give a shit about other people, was actively making an effort to try and impress another human being and allowing them to step foot into his ‘nerd cave’.

You really can’t make this stuff up.

"Y'know,” she drawls after a moment of complete silence, an almost cat-like smirk stretching itself across her pale cheeks, “for a while there, I thought you weren't interested in girls."

"Oh, for the love of- GET OUT!"

#eltingville club x reader #bill dickey x reader #bill dickey x you #ooc? who cares!!#an apology for ghosting #reader rlly loves to bother bill #*cutely rips my own face off*#jerry fan forced into being a bill liker #hes rlly fun to write for tho #rainbow road as the starter map bc ofc he would #author glossed over comics so work might have some inconsistencies #author also got sick of rewriting and wanted this posted asap #author throws in obnoxious 90s references #unedited!!#does his door rlly have a sign? NOW IT DOES #watched mario kart footage for this #ill fix it later

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mommyslittlebird · 4 months ago

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You Look So Good (On Your Knees)

Voyeur!Mommy!Wanda x Daddy!Natasha x Reader

What was supposed to be just a weekly movie night quickly turns into something else when you catch a glimpse of something you weren’t supposed to see.

CW: Voyeurism, threesome, strap-on, flogging, orgasm denial (? A tiny bit?), caught in the act (once again a tiny bit), punishment, dacryphilia, degradation, hair pulling, choking (not really), reader calls WandaNat mommy/daddy

Word Count: 3.5k

A/N: This is for @wandamaximoffsbadgirl. Thank you for all your help! I hope this was worth clawing your way under the door. Writing this (particularly the very end) has put me in a total WandaNat x Reader tailspin so expect some fluffy domestic stuff in the coming weeks.

A/N: I kinda sorta definitely double dipped for this fic, and it’s a spin of a different fic I did for a different fandom. But new fandom new crowd, and I figure almost none of you have read my non-marvel work. So the self-plagiarism is strong, but will probably go unnoticed anyway.

“Wanda? Natasha?” You called into the seemingly empty house.

It was Thursday night, your designated movie night with the couple: your long term friends and fuck buddies. They’d given you a key months ago. So, when you knocked and no one answered you just let yourself in.

You set down your bag in the living room, looking for them around the house. Their cars were both in the driveway. They had to be home. After investigating the first floor, you went upstairs. Maybe they were already in the bedroom waiting for you. That is where you always had your movie nights, after all.

You cracked the door open to find them both on the bed, Natasha underneath Wanda in an intense kiss. Natasha was grinding up against Wanda’s thigh, whining and breathless. You could tell by the way her hips were starting to falter, she was close. They must’ve been at this for a while. You didn’t want to interrupt.

You took a step back, trying to quietly shut the door. Maybe you could just wait downstairs until they finished. But before you could click the door fully shut, you heard Wanda’s commanding voice. “Not so fast, little girl.”

You sighed. You’d been caught. You opened the door back up, revealing Wanda pulling herself away from her wife. She looked at you with a cold glare, curling her fingers, instructing you to come to her.

She had you stand between her legs at the foot of the bed. “Did you not think to knock when coming into mommy and daddy’s room?”

“I-I knocked outside! I couldn’t find you! I was just looking for-“ you desperately tried to explain.

Wanda cut you off with a smirk. “Well, you found us.”

“I-I’m sorry,” you apologized. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“Oh but honey, you did interrupt,” Wanda explained condescendingly. “You interrupted and now daddy doesn’t get to cum.”

“W-what? No but she was so close! Please let her cum mommy,” you pleaded on Natasha’s behalf. You genuinely felt terrible. You knew what that kind of denial felt like and you would never wish it on anyone, especially not your daddy.

Natasha smiled when you jumped to her defense, joining you and Wanda at the end of the bed. She beckoned you over to her, quickly pulling you to sit on her lap. She wrapped her arms around your waist, whispering into your ear. “It’s okay, baby. You're gonna make daddy cum so good later, aren’t you?”

You whimpered, shivering against her. God, you had hoped movie night would start like this.

“But for right now,” Wanda started. “We’ve got to teach somebody a lesson about knocking, don’t we? It’s your fault daddy didn’t get to cum, so daddy should be allowed to punish you, shouldn’t she?”

You looked to Natasha, who just raised her eyebrows expectantly, and then you nodded. “Yes mommy.”

“That’s our good girl,” Wanda purred, running her hand down the side of your face and lightly pinching your cheek. “Now, daddy’s gonna get you all set up on the bench while mommy goes to get some toys, okay?”

They both stood almost synchronously. Wanda briefly disappeared into the next room while Natasha hoisted you up in her arms, laying you face down on the leather bench next to the bed. She propped the back part up so it turned into more of a seat.

Wanda came from the closet with a long black leather flogger, her implement of choice for this particular scene. She handed it to Natasha, who smiled and gave her a kiss. Wanda sat down next to you, propped up over a seat you were now straddling.

She wiped the hair from your face. “Ready?”

You nodded into the soft, plush leather of the seat. You could already feel yourself easily slipping into that fuzzy space, where all the thoughts, worries, and responsibilities became irrelevant.

Wanda smiled, noticing the way your eyes glazed over. “I need to hear you say it, angel.”

“Yes, mommy,” you said as clearly as you could muster.

Wanda ran the back of her hand down your cheek. You shivered. She was the only lesbian you’d ever meet who always wore acrylics. The sharp point of her stiletto nails on your face sent tingles down your spine. You closed your eyes, losing yourself to the sensation.

You felt the leather tassels of the flogger brush lightly against your back. You whimpered, squirming in your seat.

“You don’t have to count, honey,” Wanda soothed. “Just let go. Mommy and daddy are gonna take care of you. You don’t have to think about anything at all.”

With that you felt the first sharp sting of leather snap against your back. You let out a noise between a whimper and moan. Natasha started slow, each hit a distinct sensation on your back, but as she started to pick up the pace, the strikes became less distinct.

In less than five minutes, she’d made a mess of you. You whined and squirmed against the leather seat.

“Aww sweetheart,” Wanda cooed. “Do you need mommy to hold you still while daddy whips you?” Before you could answer, the blows stopped.

“Nooo…” you whined. “Daddy keep going. Please I promise I’ll sit still. Please don’t stop.”

Despite your protest, you felt two strong hands pick you from your seat. “I’m not done, princess,” you heard Natasha’s soft voice say. “But you’ve gotta stop squirming or I’m accidentally going to hit you in the kidneys.”

You were lowered into Wanda’s lap, where your legs were forced wider apart in order to straddle her. It made it significantly harder to move. She locked her hand around your thigh to keep you in place. Her other hand gently massaged your hair. “That’s it honey. Mommy will make sure you stay nice and still.”

Her long nails against your scalp were almost enough to make the thoughts fly from your head. “But… But you’ll get hit.”

Wanda chuckled and kissed your temple. “Daddy has excellent aim, sweetheart. I’ll be fine. You don’t need to worry about anything at all.”

The leather cracked against your back again. It hurt more now that your back was already raw. If not for Wanda’s hand pinning you in place, you might’ve jumped off her lap entirely. You whined wrapping your arms around Wanda.

She cradled your head over her shoulder, gently shushing your cries as she watched Natasha bring the leather down against your back over and over again.

“Mommy…” you whined into her ear. You were trying to ride her thighs like you had ridden the leather seat, but the awkward position prevented you from getting any friction whatsoever. It wasn’t even until Wanda felt drops of warmth on her thighs that she realized why you were whining.

“Aww,” she hummed, “you’re making a bit of a mess on mommy’s lap, baby.”

“I’m sorry, mommy,” you mumbled into her shoulder. “I just… it feels so good.”

“All this just from a flogging, sweetheart?” She teased. She would’ve loved to tease you further, but she was genuinely afraid you’d accidentally hurt yourself if she stopped holding you in place, much less if she had her hand between your legs.

You blushed, burying your face into her neck. “Mommy…” you whined when the leather stung your back once again. “Mommy please…”

Wanda’s heart melted at your words. The combination of your pathetic voice begging her for relief and your frail body in her arms made her want to ruin you in a different way. You were just so vulnerable. It would be such a waste to not take advantage of you in this state. “Alright,” She cooed. “I think she’s learned her lesson, hasn’t she Tasha?”

Natasha chuckled, but she stopped her flogging. “Do you think she’s learned her lesson, or have you just gone soft for a ‘mommy please’?”

Wanda wrapped her arm around your back, long nails still masterfully massaging your scalp. She rocked you back and forth in her lap. “Oh come on Tasha, look at her: getting all pathetic and leaky in her mommy’s lap. Doesn’t it just make you wanna…”

“Throw her on the bed and fuck her into the mattress until the only things in her little head are mommy and daddy?” Natasha finished.

“Exactly,” Wanda smiled mischievously. It was such a marvelous thing that she married someone who was always on the same wavelength as she was.

You were promptly picked up out of Wanda’s lap from behind. You whined, reaching out for Wanda.

“Now now,” Natasha chided. “None of that. Mommy’s not going anywhere. She’s gonna be here with you the whole time.”

She guided you to kneel on the bed, nudging your legs apart. Almost instinctively, your hands were crossed at the wrist behind your back.

Wanda hadn’t exactly planned on binding your wrist, but when you sat so perfectly, so expectantly, she could hardly resist.

“Natasha, would you like to bind this little darling's hands for us?” She instructed.

Natasha smiled, eagerly grabbing a length of pink ribbon and getting to work on tying your wrists together. She so loved tying you up. While a simple figure 8 around the wrists would’ve done the trick, she decided instead on a more complex design that would bind you up to the elbow. She knew she had time. Wanda would require a thorough inspection before she’d let Nat fuck you.

Wanda ran a singular finger through your slit. Her cold rings and sharp nail bumped over your clit as she dragged her hand upward. The sensation caused you to jump and whimper. Wanda just chuckled, bringing her finger lightly up your body until it was at your lips. You took her finger obediently between your lips.

“Do you think your ready for daddy to fuck you, baby?” she asked. “Does this needy pussy want daddy’s cock?”

You nodded, trying not to wince as her rings made their way onto your tongue, filling your mouth with a metallic taste.

“Which of daddy’s toys do you want, huh?” She asked, intentionally pushing down on your tongue so you couldn’t talk. “I’ll think I’ll have daddy use the purple strap. The one with the- what did you call them- the ‘mean ridges’? The ones that scrap against your special spot?”

You whined around her finger, giving her the most endearing puppy dog eyes you could possibly muster.

“Oh sweetheart,” she cooed, “do you not like that one? Maybe you’d prefer it if daddy tied you to the chair and you watched her fuck mommy instead, hmm? Maybe you’d just prefer not to have any orgasms at all?”

You shook your head frantically. You wanted to protest, to promise you’d be good and take that dreaded purple strap, but you couldn’t speak.

She chuckled. “That’s what I thought, baby. You’re gonna be a good girl for mommy and daddy, aren’t you?”

You nodded. She pulled her finger from your mouth and tilted your head up to kiss you gently.

“That’s our sweet girl,” she praised. “Aw it looks like daddy’s finished tying you up all pretty. Can you say thank you to daddy?”

You craned your neck to the side, trying to see her behind you. “Thank you, daddy, for tying me up all pretty.”

Natasha laughed, pulling you back towards her by the ribbon. She kissed you and smiled. “You’re welcome, baby. Can you show mommy your pretty ribbon?”

You attempted to turn around to show Wanda the way your hands and arms were intricately bound behind your back, but Natasha pushed you forward into the mattress. You yelped, surprised by the sudden move.

“A present, wrapped special for you, my love,” Natasha said to Wanda, leaning over you to kiss her wife.

“You always know just what to get me,” Wanda breathed against her lips. “Now go get ready, love. I wanna watch you make our sweet little girl cry.”

Natasha climbed off the bed behind you, disappearing into the next room.

Wanda’s nails were against your sore back, rubbing soothing as you lay in wait. You attempted to sit up, but Wanda clicked her tongue. “No, baby,” she chided. “Stay just like this.”

You felt the bed dip as Natasha climbed back on behind you. Her calloused hands lifted your hips so you were kneeling tall. The angle forced your face even further into the mattress. You couldn’t put your hands out to hold yourself up with them tied up behind your back.

Natasha ran the tip of the strap up and down your slit, pulling a muffled moan from your lips. She lined the toy up with your entrance, gently easing it inside. She threw her head back and moaned as she felt each of the ‘mean ridges’ push into you, then she pushed your hips forward and pulled them back, silently commanding you to fuck yourself as you adjusted to her girth.

The toy was, admittedly, slightly too big for you to manage without any discomfort. The ridges cruelly raked against your inner walls, causing you to wince with each movement. But with time, you were able to adjust to feel only a slight, delicious stretch.

After you’d grown to a moderate pace, Natasha took over, grabbing your thighs and pulling them back to meet her own. You let your body go limp, allowing Natasha to control your movements completely. You were putty in her hands.

“Fuck, Wands you should see her from here,” Natasha groaned, looking down and watching the large toy disappear inside of you over and over again. “Fuck it’s like she swallowing me whole. Needy little cunt. Can’t get enough of daddy’s cock can you?”

You tried to bury your face into the sheets to muffle the noises she tore from you, but you were unsuccessful. Without your hands or your arms, your range of motion was severely limited.

Wanda’s eyes went wide and her face cracked into a smile when she heard the first hiccup of a cry. She leaned forward. “Tasha, hold her up. I want to see her face.”

Natasha reached down and grabbed your hair, pulling your head up so you were face to face with Wanda. She could see the build up of tears in the corners of your eyes and the way your bottom lip quivered, threatening to give way to a sob.

“Aww, sweet girl,” she cooed. “Are you going to cry for mommy? It’s okay angel, you can cry. Daddy’s not gonna stop fucking you even if you are going to be a sobbing little mess.”

Natasha fucked you harder, nearly pulling all the way out before she slammed back into you again. She kept your head up, forcing you to look at Wanda even as your eyes rolled back and your vision went blurry with tears. Natasha wrapped her hand around your throat, grabbing you just under your chin. She braced her forearm against your chest, pinning you upright against her.

The position only accentuated the effect of the ridges, causing them to bump more aggressively against the spongy spot inside of you. “Aww look at how pathetic you look, crying your little eyes out while daddy fills you with her cock.” Wanda teased.

You felt Natasha’s breath hot against your ear. “Tell mommy how pathetic you are.”

You offered little more than a whine in response. Your bottom lip continued to tremble as tears rolled down your cheeks.

“Aww, sweet girl, there’s no need to be embarrassed,” Wanda assured. “It’s just me and daddy.”

You weren’t truly embarrassed, if you were being honest. You honestly felt like a masterpiece: a carefully constructed vision that Wanda and Natasha had crafted you into. But you played coy nonetheless. You had more fun when Wanda told you how pathetic you looked anyway.

“Poor thing,” Wanda taunted, “never learned how to take a proper fucking without crying.” Her eyes never left yours. Everything about watching her wife handle your helpless body drove her wild.

“I’m sorry mommy… I can’t help it… daddy’s cock feels so good inside of me,” you panted.

Natasha felt a burst of heat in her own core. Between yours and Wanda’s words she could feel herself creeping towards the edge. She just needed a bit of a different angle. She released her hold on you, causing you to fall helplessly back into the mattress. Wanda gently turned your head, preventing you from muffling yourself in the sheets.

You cursed. The combination of Wanda’s gentle hands and the new angle that hit all your most sensitive spots had you so close to an orgasm. All it would take was just a little more pressure on your clit. Unfortunately, with your hands bound behind your back, you were completely at their mercy.

“Please…” you begged mindlessly. “Please don’t stop. Fuck daddy. Please never stop.” You felt so certain that if Natasha pulled out of you right now, you’d simply die on the spot.

“You want to cum on daddy’s cock so badly don’t you?” Wanda teased. “But you can’t touch yourself. Poor baby.”

Natasha changed her pace. She could feel her own orgasm building as she felt the pull of the toy’s ridges pumping in and out of you. “Beg for mommy to let you cum, baby. I wanna hear you begging like the little slut you are.”

“Fuck!” you sobbed. The words poured out of your mouth nearly as fast as the tears poured from your eyes. “Please I’m all yours. I’m mommy and daddy’s little slut. Please, you can use me whenever you want. I’m just a little toy for mommy and daddy. Please I just need daddy’s cock inside me forever. Mommy please let me cum.”

“That’s a good girl,” Wanda praised, “begging mommy and daddy to use you like a little toy. That’s all you are right? A toy for mommy and daddy’s pleasure?”

“Yes!” you chanted. “Yes! I’m mommy and daddy’s toy. Please let me cum. Please mommy.”

“I wanna see you cum on daddy’s cock. Can you be a good girl and cum on daddy’s cock for mommy?” She asked.

Natasha curled her arm around your waist, pinching your clit and milking it between her fingers. Your eyes rolled back and your mouth opened in a silent scream as you fell apart.

Natasha continued to fuck you as you came, clenching around the strap. The pulsing put the perfect amount of pressure on her own clit, sending her into an orgasm not long after you.

She steadied herself on your hips, taking a few deep breaths in an attempt to regain her composure. She pulled the ribbon, and Wanda watched in fascination as the entire thing unraveled itself. They both chuckled as your arms bonelessly flopped down beside you.

Natasha hooked her arm around your waist to prevent you from simply collapsing when she pulled out. She laid you gently on your side before climbing off the bed. She disappeared into the bathroom, leaving you with Wanda.

You whined as the toy left, suddenly feeling terribly empty. Wanda sat down on the bed next to you, chuckling again as she bent over to kiss your temple. “I know, love. It’s just devastating that daddy can’t stay inside you forever, isn’t it?”

You nodded, whining again as you felt her wipe away the remnants of your orgasm.

“You did so well for us, love,” she praised, adjusting your position on the bed so you rested against the pillows. She pulled up some blankets, smiling as you wiggled in blissful content. “Comfy, honey?”

You nodded, reaching your arms out for her.

She crawled into bed next to you, wrapping her arms around you. She kissed your forehead, earning herself a dopey, blissed out smile from you. She kissed your cheek, licking up what was left of a few salty tears. She moaned at the taste.

Natasha came out of the bathroom, freshened up in nothing but a pair or boxers. She joined you and Wanda in bed, crawling in next to you. She kissed the top of your head. “Are you girls ready for movie night?”

You nodded. “I already promised mommy she gets my movie night cuddles this time, though.”

“What the hell?” Natasha said jokingly, pulling you forcibly into her lap and berating you with kisses. “Daddy fucks you so hard you can’t think straight and mommy still get the movie night cuddles?”

You giggled, squirming out of her kiss attack. “You always fall asleep anyway!”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah. Because I just fucked you so hard you couldn’t think straight. You wear me out, little girl.”

“Fine, daddy cuddles until you fall asleep, and then mommy cuddles,” you compromise.

“That sounds perfect, princess,” Natasha smiled, kissing you briefly.

You looked to Wanda for her approval. She smiled. “Fine. You can cuddle with daddy for the 20 minutes she’s awake, and then you’re all mine for the rest of the night.”

You wrapped your arms around both of them, pulling them into a tight hug. “Deal.”

#wanda maximoff smut #mommy wanda #wanda x you #wanda x reader #wanda maximoff #wanda x y/n #wandanat x y/n #wandanat #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #wanda maximoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #wandanat x reader #wandanat x you

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yunhoshands · 1 year ago

Text

Teasing San

San x gn reader

Summary: MINORS DNI You've been teasing your boyfriend San for days, he surprises you at home and gets his revenge (sorta)

Trigger warnings: cnc? (san surprises reader by sneaking up on her so idk),

Content warnings: names (sweetheart, baby, sugar), oral (m receiving), choking (briefly), san’s got a big dick (obviously), cnc? (san surprises reader by sneaking up on her so idk), plz lmk if I forgot anything

Words: 1.5k

You'd been teasing your boyfriend San for days while he was away on his work trip. He’d only been gone a couple of days to do photoshoots for his new album but you’d been needy since he left. You didn’t get to spend a lot of time together due to his idol schedule and you working a full time job while doing college online, but you made the most of the time you had together.

Even your time apart could be enjoyable, despite how much you missed him. You had learned that it was exhilarating to tease him when he couldn't do anything about it. Sending him suggestive pictures of you in just a towel, in the new underwear you bought, (your personal favorite) with something in your mouth (a sucker, a pencil, an ice pop, etc) anything that reminded him of having his cock in your mouth.

You knew you were in for it when he finally got back, but you couldn’t help it, it was too much fun reading his texts.

“You that needy baby? Why don’t you use the toys I bought you and send me a video of that?” (You never would of course, because you loved when he would try to tell you what to do when he couldn't do anything about it)

“Baby, you just love watching me squirm don't you? Well I love watching you cry for me, and you will once I get my hands on you.”

“You just love pretending it's my cock between those pretty lips don't you?”, were the kinds of things he would text you.

San wasn't due back till this evening so you decided to work on an assignment to pass the time. Putting on your headphones, you hit play on your playlist and open up your laptop, trying to focus and not think about your boyfriend.

After a while you thought you heard a noise from the kitchen but quickly dismissed it since you were focused on your assignment. Without warning you felt a warm hand on the back of your neck that made you jump. You attempted to whirl your head around but couldn't because of the strong grip on you. Your breath picked up as the hand made its way around to the front of your neck and cupped your jaw, before moving down to grip your throat.

By this time you recognized the grip as your boyfriends, the musky scent of his cologne enveloping you. Your eyes rolled back as his grip on your throat tightened. He pulled your headphones off and began leaving territorial kisses along your neck. Licking a stripe from your shoulder to your ear, before leaving kisses along the curve of your ear causing you to let out a shaky gasp.

“Working on homework baby?” San asked breathily, clearly as affected by your reaction.

“Was…was um ... waiting on you…” you muttered, unable to think clearly as you craned your neck to the side, yearning for more of the feeling of San’s velvety lips on your neck.

“Yea? Did you miss me?” He asked cockily. “Sending me all those slutty pictures, knowing I couldn’t touch you for days. Driving me absolutely insane.” His hand that wasn't around your neck, moved to your desk, caging you into your desk chair as San continued his assault on your neck (and your sanity).

“Mmm” you hummed at the feeling of his nose drawing a line from your shoulder to your ear before stopping at your ear again before nipping at the tip of it.

“Words baby, did you miss daddy?” He asked, using the nickname he knew never failed to make your pussy drip.

“Yes daddy…missed you,” you whined.

Quickly he spun your chair around so you were face to face. His cat-like eyes dark with want, lust, and dominance. After not seeing him for days your brain short circuited at how beautiful he was. His muscular arms fighting to rip out of the holes of his black t-shirt, and his jet black hair falling perfectly into his face.

You fought the urge to brush his hair away from his eyes, instead you leaped up from your chair and crashed your lips into his, startling your boyfriend.

You were never normally so bold, but your want for him was greater than your self control.

His velvety lips slotted perfectly with yours, immediately opening up to let your tongue inside. You took time exploring each other's mouths, relearning each and every curve of each other's lips, and memorizing the taste of each other as if it would be the last time you saw each other. San nipped at your bottom lip before asserting his dominance by lapping at the roof of your mouth, causing you to whine and tilt your head back so he had better access.

San walked you both over to the bed, never once relenting his attack on your mouth. He sat down at the edge of the bed, leaving you standing between his legs. This position giving him the perfect access to trail kisses between your breasts and down your body, all while keeping eye contact with you.

You released a whine when he stopped at the waistband of your joggers. Your boyfriend chuckled at your obvious neediness. “What? You don't like being teased? How do you think I felt the last couple of days?” He asked with a smirk. You let your eyes droop to the floor, partially because you weren't prepared for his retaliation, and partially because you were so aroused you were afraid if you looked him in the eye he’d see how desperate you were for him.

“Get on your knees for me sweetheart, show daddy how much you missed me,” he commanded, leaning back on his elbows.

Immediately you got down on your knees and began undoing his pants, leaving kisses on the bulge in his boxers, earning you a sharp hiss from your cocky boyfriend, confirming that he was just as affected and needy as you were.

Releasing his hard length from his boxers, you began leaving kitten licks along his shaft completely ignoring the tip of his cock, where you knew he needed you most.

“Baby please,” San whined pitifully, letting his dominant act slip. “Haven't you teased me enough?” he begged, earning a giggle from you. You decided to give him what he wanted though. Looking him in the eyes you finally took his girthy length into your mouth. He was so thick it was difficult to fit his entire cock in your throat but you tried anyway, gagging on his weeping cock.

You swirl your tongue around the head of his cock, savoring every drop of precum. You could feel every ridge of his cock as it slid in and out of your mouth. San groaned at the sight before him and placed his hand in your hair, stroking affectionately. “Your so beautiful with my cock in your mouth baby, so much better than a fucking sucker,”

You moaned around his cock at his words, you loved it so much when he told you how beautiful you looked choking on his cock.

“Your tiny fucking mouth is going to be the end of me,”

You began bobbing your head faster and hollowing your cheeks more to show him how much his words had an effect on you.

“Fuck baby, I’m gonna cum if you keep that up,” he groaned out in warning, his hand grabbing a fistfull of your hair, trying to control your movements. You fluttered your eyes up at him. He was a sight to behold, with his head thrown back and his eyes rolling to the back of his head as he let out the most pornogrpahic groans you’ve ever heard.

You reached up to pump the length of his cock you couldn't fit in your mouth, and used the other to massage his balls. You were sure he was going to fall over the edge soon, his hot length twitching in your mouth.

“Fuck baby, fuck fuck fuck, I’m gonna fill that dirty little mouth with cum baby, fuck,” he gritted out, his hands gripping your head and bobbing you faster on his cock before releasing his load into your throat. His salty cum coated your tongue as you released his cock.

“Show me,” he panted. You stuck out your tongue, painted white with his cum. He smiled, “Now swallow baby.”

You followed his directions, his warm cum coating your throat as you swallowed.

“Good girl” he cooed as you stuck out your tongue again to show him you did what he asked.

You giggled and smiled at his praise.

“Can you hand me the water baby?” you asked, voice raspy after his sudden (but welcome) assault on your throat.

“This one?” San asked, pointing to the glass on your nightstand. You nodded your head.

He handed you the glass, and you finished it in a few gulps. “You didn’t leave any for me,” San commented. You looked up at him slightly confused. “Doesn’t matter, I know of something else I’d rather have anyway,”

“Wha…” you were cut off by your boyfriend picking you up and laying you on the bed, his soft lips trailing up your leg towards your sopping cunt.

“You’ve teased me for days sugar, its time I repay the favor,”

Authors Note: I hope ya’ll enjoyed! This is my first time writing anything with the intention of sharing it, and the first time ive written anything period in a long time lol. I really want to start writing more so please let me know if you have any requests!!

#ateez #ateez smut #san smut #san x reader #choi san smut

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sinnerbanshee · 7 months ago

Text

NakedToaster x Fem Aligned Reader

(fem aligned as in female genitals and body, but they/them pronouns [may right a transmasc version as well]) (Please give me all your feedback!!) (also idk what to headcanon his name as soo)

18+, MINORS + AGELESS BLOGS DNI

Summary: Your husband Toaster and you have been together for 6 years, married for 1. A couple weeks ago you both talked about adding something new in the bedroom, and you both love it.

WARNINGS: Pegging, afab reader

2747 Words, 7 Pages on Google Docs

Tonight will be fun.

You and Toaster (your pretty husband) had previously talked about trying pegging. He was sorta against it at first, but after a long discussion of safewords, color codes, and other safety measures, he felt reassured you would take care of him just fine.

Only issue, this man was a virgin, like hardcore, most he’s ever done prior to you was maybe a kiss on a dare. Though, you both had gotten quite comfortable in the bedroom after you moved in together, all new experiences come with nerves, and that was okay.

Tonight would be taken slow, no matter how much you both got excited, slow.

You had already gone out and bought everything, with his input of course. Though, you did have fun picking out a rainbow strap on harness, why decide on one color when you can get them all?

Anywho, you both decided on an average 6.5 inch pink silicone toy, and some gummy bear lube (you thought it added a fun touch to everything since it was edible and smelled nice).

The silicone would be easy to clean provided you got some cleaner from the store, and the length would hopefully be more comfortable for Toaster than anything else. (though you wanted to get something his length, you decided to keep your evil plans to yourself…..till a later date)

After getting home, your precious lover was out on a grocery run, you had run out of coffee and since you both live on that it’s kinda needed.

The bed had fresh sheets-a nice but cheap pair that you wouldn’t have to worry about ruining-and even got some nice calming candles and room spray, knowing that afterwards the smell of sweat would be prominent.

The bathroom had some new soaps and some gentle wash clothes since you knew you’d both probably be sore.

Now you just wait for him to get home….which would be another….2 hours.

God you forget sending him out to shop on his own can be a mess, you should’ve just both gone with to the stores, save time. But you also wanted to surprise him with something nice, be sweet and as attentive as he is. God, he’s so sweet, so nice to you, you were so worried he wouldn’t like the surprise.

You know he’d love anything you planned, he always does, even when you fucked up his birthday party that one year because you forgot to get any treats other than the normal food.

The nerves just wouldn’t go away, you had double, triple, quadruple checked hell, you think you went over everything 6 times even.

And then you heard it, his keys turning the door to your little house, you basically ran, tripping down the stairs, to get there before he opened it.

Thankfully you didn’t face plant and beat him to opening the door.

You were smiling wide despite the sweat on your neck, the robe you both previously got on your honeymoon in California, slightly less than perfect as you’d like it, but it’s fine.

He gently kisses your cheek and chuckles at your slightly disheveled hair as he carries the groceries to the kitchen as you follow him like a lost puppy.

“I got coffee, and a couple sweet treats, I noticed your stash running low so I just got basically everything I know you like.” He blushed a bit, even after dating for multiple years and being married for 1, he could barely keep track of all the candy you liked.

“Oh! You didn’t need to do that honey, I was gonna get some on my way to work tomorrow”

Toaster sets the bags down and turns around, placing his hands gently on your sides as he leans down to gently kiss you.

“I wanted to treat you, I know work hasn’t been the best and I know you treats are one of the many things you look forward to when you get home and…”

He trails off as he looks away nervously, even after all these years he’s so nervous and it’s so cute to you how he’s always so shy after so long.

“Well thank you baby, I appreciate it”

You smile wide and lean into his touch, leaning your head on his chest as you both sway side to side for a couple of minutes in comfortable silence. Times like these were nice, quiet and sweet moments where you’re both just enjoying the other’s company and presence.

He stops swaying and looks down at you again.

“So, I was told you have my surprise ready, yeah?”

Now it was your turn to blush, a slight pink hue came to your cheeks as you nodded and took his hand, gently leading him up to your shared bedroom leaving the grocery bags long forgotten.

As you both entered the room, the candles were lit, a slight scent of lavender and roses went through the air, the bed was made nicely and everything was set on it, your strap on, the lube, even a condom just to be safe and make him comfortable.

You both blush, him more so as he looks at everything, lord, he’s so cute, you can’t wait to enjoy this with him.

“I-I know we talked about it earlier this month, and figured since you had the day off, and we’ve both been busy with work, that we could…have a little f-fun”

The stutter in your voice wasn’t meant to be there, but lord above you couldn’t stop your heart from beating so fast, nor could you stop the adrenaline pumping through your veins, you felt so excited yet nervous. As a couple minutes pass by you look over at your lover, trying to read his expression and body language, though, that wasn’t hard at all when you looked downwards.

He was obviously as excited as you were.

“I-....wow”

He was speechless and you hoped it was the good kind, you gently step in front of him and let your robe slip off, revealing a pastel pink lingerie set, with everything except for the matching underwear.

“I wanted to have some fun, and was hoping this was okay”

You look at him and he nods, swallowing the lump in his throat as he steps toward you, looking you up and down to appreciate the thin lace and silk of your lingerie.

“Y-Yes, I was actually gonna ask about when we would uh….d-do this”

He fidgets, desperately trying to adjust his jeans to try and be more comfortable.

You smile and kiss him gently but with passion as your hands trail down his sides and to his front, slowly unzipping and unbuttoning his pants before eagerly getting on your knees to pull them down with his boxers.

“I’m glad, I wanted to treat you just as well as you treat me”

As you look up for a second you smile and then work on his pants, teasingly pulling them down before happily kissing his lower stomach down his happy trail to his cock.

“I want you to know I love you just as much as you love me, I love seeing you so cute and so shy, and I love how nice and sweet you always are”

His eyes are intently watching you as you gently kiss his lower regions, leaving the occasional lick here and there to tease him.

God, you enjoyed his eyes on you so much. It was exhilarating knowing how intently he paid attention to you all the time.

You make eye contact, his face and neck flushed a light pink as you slowly push his member inside your mouth, letting out a small hum of content before bobbing your head up and down slowly.

The soft groans he let out were so nice, he was barely ever vocal, no matter how much you told him you loved his voice. You hope you can make him louder.

You pull back and gently kiss his tip before standing up and gently running your hands up and down his sides.

“Get undressed, please?”

You smile softly at him and he nods, not wasting too much time as he strips down, letting you look at him in all his naked glory, no matter if he had scars, tattoos, piercings, his body would look perfect to you, no matter what.

You kiss every single mole and freckle he has on his body, cherishing him as he does you and you run your hands over his inner thighs before standing up and kissing him eagerly, him kissing back with just as much passion.

His hands copy yours almost exactly as he runs them all over your body as much as he can.

You gently step backwards to lead him to the bed, pushing the items set over to the side as you pat a spot for him to sit.

He complies and sits down, still slightly nervous as he tries to look everywhere but down at himself, knowing he is as excited as you are, and it’s showing very much.

You get on your knees again in front of him and set your hands gently on his thighs.

“To go over, you remember the safe word, and colors right love?”

He nods before responding.

“Strawberry, green for I’m fine, yellow for slow down, and red to stop completely”

I nod and kiss his inner thighs.

“Correct, now don’t get nervous or scared to say anything, I am here to take care of and love you, and if that means stopping for a break or even for the night, I am fine with it. I just want you to be comfortable and okay with everything we do”

He smiles softly and nods as he looks at you, love and adoration in his eyes.

You sit up and grab the strap on and lube.

“Now, I also know we talked about you enjoying yourself prior to this so you know whether you like it or not”

His face goes almost bright red when remembering the talk as he nods.

“Have you?”

He chuckles nervously.

“Y-Yes, I uh….bought some things a couple days ago to make sure I was comfortable with e-everything”

You smile wide at him, a mischievous glint in your eye.

“And?...”

You trail off as you make eye contact with one another.

“I-I enjoyed it….a lot”

You giggle softly and gently caress his thigh.

“Good, do you wanna do full on prep or just some since you’re okay with it”

“Just a l-little”

You stand up and gesture to him to lay down and turn over, as he complies he arches his back a bit so his hips are higher.

You give a slight slap that makes him jump a little before grabbing the lube and putting some on your fingers, slowly inserting 2.

“Cold baby”

He lets out a soft moan, gripping the sheets at the slight stretch feeling, tensing up slightly and shivering from how cold the lube is.

As you slowly move your fingers in and out you feel him relax more and let out slightly louder moans.

You lean down and gently kiss down his back, admiring his freckles that are splattered all over him, they are beautiful, almost like stars against his skin.

Your free hand, not covered in the sticky lube gently traced up his back, down his side, and to his front before slowly and teasingly jerking him off.

As his moans get louder your hands speed up.

You stop just before he’s able to cum, both of you panting as you lick the hand that was on his dick clean of the pre that leaked, not bothering to wipe the other one off as you grab the strap on.

As you put on the harness, you move your lingerie out of the way, don't wanna get it too dirty before you can wear it a second time.

You gently caress Toaster’s back again as you grab the lube to cover a good half of the blue dildo, using your free hand to jerk the silicone so it was evenly coated.

Slowly you lined your hips up with his before gently putting your hands on either of his sides.

“Ready babe?”

He nodded and you leaned down to kiss the back of his neck.

“Words honey, you know the rules we talked about.”

He shuddered a bit, most definitely not used to you being the dominant one, you could tell he was blushing, the back of his neck was slightly pink and heated up.

“Y-Yes”

Your hips slowly press into his, the slicked up silicone of the dildo slowly being pushed inside him as you both slightly tense up, you more so because he tensed than anything else.

Once bottomed out, you rubbing soothing circles on his sides and gently leave kisses, licks, small nips down his back as he starts to relax.

You watch as his back arches, pushing his hips impossibly close to yours, it almost made you giggle.

His legs shook slightly, obviously not used to being in this position as he took shaky breathes.

“F-Feels deep….is this what i-it’s like when I…” He trails off, the rest of his question obvious as you slowly start moving your hips, slowly and gently thrusting in and out of him.

“Actually, it’s deeper for me, but youuuu, didn’t wanna get one that’s your length”

You playfully smack his ass.

“Honestly if this feels deep? I think your length reallyyy would have you being loud”

The thought of him being the one screaming instead of you sounded nice as hell. Other than the fact your neighbors would be pissed off again.

Your hips keep moving, steadily picking up pace until you’re pulling his hips to meet yours at a nice and steady pace.

The harness was doing wonders for you, it had some nubs built into the actual genital area, while you’re pretty sure it’s to help keep it from slipping off too easily. Those little plastic nubs were working wonders on your clit.

It wasn’t long before you both were being loud as fuck, between Toasty getting jerked off and pegged, and the harness rubbing against all the right spots on you. Y’all could probably wake the whole town. (If you hadn’t already)

After a couple minutes of the steady pace, as you get closer to your release you speed up, hips practically snapping against his as lewd squelching noises could be heard.

Your hand followed the quick pace your hips set as best as you can, you hear him whimper as his hips buck into your hand, his cum coating your hand and the sheets under him as his legs all but give out.

Seeing him cum from you like this made you speed up, his soft moans and whimpers spurring you on until the harness around your pelvis was covered in your own juices.

Your hips slow to a halt, the dildo bottomed out inside Toaster as you lean down and greedily kiss him as your hands wonder over his sweaty and sticky body.

After a couple minutes of making out, you both needed air, so you pulled back. You slowly pull out of him, hearing a soft groan as he finally lets his body go limp, closing his eyes.

As you slowly take the harness off and kinda waddle to the bathroom, your legs almost like jelly. Now you understand why Toasty lays in bed for a couple before cleaning you off.

You grab one of the new soft washcloths and wet it with warm water and the littlest bit of soap as you waddle back to the room.

Gently, you run the washcloth over Toaster’s body, occasionally going over a spot twice if you felt it needed it. After all the sticky lube and his cum were cleaned off him, you wiped yourself clean and threw the towel into the towel basket, putting away the strap on and everything else you then got comfy next to your lovely husband.

You gently kiss his forehead.

“Baby, you awake?”

He makes a soft groan in acknowledgment back at you, his eyes still closed. You giggle softly and cuddle close to him, closing your own eyes.

“I love you, Toasty” He hums and you see him smile tiredly.

“Love you too honey”

You take his glasses off and put them up, both of you falling asleep comfortably holding the other.

(Please lmk what y'all think, first time writing in this new style and also my first pegging and first fluffy smut)

#blooming panic nakedtoaster #nakedtoaster #blooming panic #nakedtoaster x reader #x reader #gender neutral reader #afab reader #blooming panic x reader

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violettaskies · 2 years ago

Text

Not Just a Dream

Prompt: sex toys

Pairing: bodyguard!eddie munson x f!reader

Notes: wc 9.5k // kinktober story two of five // hope everyone enjoys this one, the love for the first story was so crazy omgggg and it’s so heartwarming to see all the support. so thank you for everything // this is my first au sorta thing so i hope everything makes sense // eddie is a perv as always lol

Warnings: MINORS DNI, 18+ ONLY, NSFW // peeping, pillow humping, sex toys, vibrator, masturbation, mutual masturbation // smut // reader’s first time is mentioned, not the most mind blowing experience, but not gone into heavy detail // please let me know if there are any more that need to be added!

ao3 // kinktober masterlist // full masterlist // lazy ghoul’s kinktober prompts

-:-:-:-:-

To say that this was probably the easiest job in the world would be an understatement. For years, of doing newspaper routes in the rain, having near-misses with the Hawkins’ police department due to being Reefer Rick’s little dealer — being a bodyguard was pretty sweet. Especially since he is always standing next to an angelic beauty as the person he needs to protect on a daily basis. It was truly a miracle that this job fell into Eddie’s lap, literally.

As he was rummaging through shelves to look for something to do whilst hiding away from the hypothetical pitchforks of the townspeople several days ago, there was one item in Rick’s home that stood out from the rest. It was a copy of The Silmarillion, which could be deemed as relatively normal in homes with a bookworm or two. However, it being the only novel in the entirety of the building, was strange. Within the pages, there was a piece of paper with a note that contained a phone number and address. Truthfully, Eddie felt like this was all meant for him, so he decided to follow it. When he did, he found himself at a large apartment complex in Chicago with a huge penthouse at the very top.

This didn’t feel right, everyone walking in and out of the lobby was dressed in the finest clothes. Even if they were going out on an afternoon jog, Eddie noted how they were still wearing a gold watch so casually. As he stood there, with the same outfit he had washed and re-wore a thousand times, the former Dealer’s heart dropped.

This was a mistake.

All he was able to do was walk backwards, almost as if he wanted to see if the beautiful architecture was bound to get smaller if he kept his gaze on it. Eddie wanted to go home — well, he wanted to find a new home. At the very least, it probably wasn’t here; the little note gave him too much hope in a time of despair. Maybe he should just —

“Are you lost?” a sweet voice nearly whispered from behind him. As Eddie was walking without looking, he had accidentally bumped into a young woman with a few books in hand.

“No, just passing through. Maybe I would have better luck if I wasn't walking backwards,” the man chuckled as he looked at you fully now, noting that you were about the same age as him; only you were definitely in a different tax bracket than him.

“Well, hopefully you can walk in the right direction to wherever you need to go.” The sound of your voice was so soft in comparison to the sounds of the city. Eddie couldn’t help that he was hypnotized the instant he took you all in.

“Y-yeah, have a good day,” although he wished to bask in your beauty for a moment longer, this city was not for him.

And so, like strangers on the street on a regular day, the two of you nodded politely before walking in opposite directions. Only Eddie stopped himself after taking three steps, just to see where you were — something in him told him to check if you were safe, like his conscience thinking straight for the first time in his life. However, he noticed how you walked into the building he was just admiring, confirming that you two really were from different worlds. Well, at least he got to see some beautiful things before leaving the city.

Or so he thought. Just as he was about to look away, he noticed two tall men dressed in long black coats following her; and then one walking his way. The man had a chiseled jaw, as if it were cut by the gods themselves. The dark sunglasses made him so much more ominous and scary to Eddie who was shorter than the man in black by at least half a foot. In a flash, Eddie was looking up at the man with the building towering above both of them.

“Come with me.” The command fell from the man’s lips in a deep tone, Eddie could nearly hear the bass in it.

“Nope,” Eddie looked around awkwardly before spinning around, only to be stopped by a firm grip on his shoulder that pulled him backwards.

If one thing was for certain, the young Munson truly knew how to get away from situations he didn’t want to be in. There were countless moments like this one where he was stopped by a manager at a store, or maybe even Chief Hopper. Sometimes they would grasp him by the shoulder, but he was always able to find a way out of the hold. This time, however, Eddie found himself surrounded by other men wearing similar-looking black suits, who all looked at him in a slightly threatening manner. It was more than enough to halt him in his tracks and take on whatever was going to happen next.

“You’ll want to come with me,” the scary man whispered in the younger man’s ear before dragging him to the alleyway and into an entrance on the side of the beautiful building that just turned into a sinister figure in his life as he was being pulled further and further into it.

-:-:-:-:-

Over the course of two weeks, way too much has happened to Eddie’s heart. He swears that it has felt like it has beaten out of his chest at least once a day due to all of the series of unfortunate events that started at home and ended up here: in a dark room with one lamp lighting it and large men dressed in suits surrounding him. Eddie knew that his life decisions would probably end up costing him a lot. But, he never knew that he would probably be paying the price now. He really should have ran when he had the chance. He has always been good at anyways. But, if he did, then he wouldn’t be able to have really seen you. Again, he’s happy he was able to see one beautiful thing in this week full of terror.

The fear within him only multiplied a thousand times as he heard footsteps walking towards the room. No one could hear a thing except for the slow patter of expensive shoes hitting the wooden floors. The noise was nearly a countdown for Eddie, each step bringing in a new question into his mind. Is someone going to kill him? What did he even do? Was the news from Hawkins spreading this fast and someone wanted the bounty? Is Rick the one walking behind him?

It wasn’t.

Instead, it was a handsome older man, probably a bit younger than his Uncle Wayne — only dressed in clothes that probably were worth more than anything everyone in this room was wearing, combined. Plus, the smell of the man’s cologne was nicer than all of the ones Eddie stole from Starcourt last year. As Eddie looked around him whilst sitting in the chair in the middle of the room, he prayed that whatever these people wanted from him, it would at least be something he had.

“Are you Rick’s kid?” the expensive-looking man’s voice echoed as he stood above Eddie.

“Rick?” He tried to sound a little dumb to make sure that they weren’t people who hated his acquaintance.

“Yeah, from Indiana. The little shit is in jail but he called us the other day. You his kid?” The man said, who Eddie figures is most likely the boss of this entire scene. “You look exactly like he said you would.”

“Looks like he set your expectations really low then,” He genuinely hasn't showered properly in days — so goodness knows how his appearance looks to people who are meeting him for the first time. Eddie chuckled as he thought about the possibility of his crazy hair being crazier right now, trying to liven up his own spirits.

Luckily, the boss did smile with him. He did seem like a nice man surrounded by scary men. Maybe it just helped whatever image he was trying to portray. Eddie remembers the times Rick would drunkenly tell stories about his boss in Chicago who was the real supplier of everything, and how he was actually a very nice and forgiving man in comparison to the other leaders in the game.

He was so nice in fact, that he snapped his fingers and someone was able to bring a chair over, so that he and Eddie were able to look at one another eye-to-eye.

“You look like shit, Rick said you’re running from something in your town,” he said in a concerned voice.

“Y-yeah, a few things,” Eddie paused. “I went over to Rick’s place and found a book—”

“Tolkien?”

“Yes, sir. There was an address in it and something in me told me to follow it.” Eddie could feel his breaths getting heavier as he knew that everyone was listening to every small detail.

The boss leaned in closer and placed a soft and comforting grasp to Eddie’s shoulder, making the younger man look at him with slightly nervous eyes. Yet, he felt like he didn’t need to feel that way anymore.

“Well, you listened to your gut, son. You listened well, I promise you’re safe now.” The boss coughed a bit in his pause. “Rick knew you’d probably head to his place and snoop around while you were hiding. Thank god he picked such an obvious book, huh?”

“I swear I’ve never seen that man read in my life,” Eddie chuckled as he saw the smile lines on the boss’ face become more prominent.

“Exactly, he’s had that in there since he got his ass in the slammer. After hearing about your little wanted poster, he called us right away.”

“You don’t need to help me, really. I can get on my way somewhere else—”

Eddie was rambling. His guilt was taking over now. There were so many people here who wanted to help him; whilst he only thought the worst when the men in black suits dragged him in here. They were probably keeping an eye out to see if he would show up. Eddie genuinely believed that he was about to die again, but he was strangely welcomed to a boss who was a lot nicer than the ones portrayed in The Godfather movies.

“We’ll help you, son,” Eddie’s heart felt warm at the nickname. “Everyone in here is wanted in a state or two, maybe even a country,” the boss laughed which made everyone else in the room follow suit.

“Help me?”

“Listen, I trust Rick. If he says you’re a good kid, then you’re a good kid. Anyways, we need another hand on deck and you’ll be the perfect person for it. You help me, and we keep you safe from the feds. Sound good?” The boss sat back in his chair with a smile waiting for a response from the younger man in front of him.

“Yes,” Eddie exclaimed rather louder than intended. “Sorry, uhm, that would be great, sir.”

“Look at you, already getting the hang of things,” the boss chuckled at the usage of the formal name. “Isn’t that right, boys?”

Echoes of agreement bounced off the walls before another snap was heard and the lights went on and blinds opened up to reveal that about two dozen people were in a grand ballroom of sorts. There were beautiful paintings and crown moulding surrounding the walls. Eddie truly wasn’t sure where he was now. However, when he looked out a window, he saw that no other building was in its way. Meaning only one thing: this was the top floor — this was the penthouse he admired from sixty stories down.

Oh God, what did he get himself into now?

-:-:-:-:-

The main job description was just to watch the security cameras, scope the halls every hour, and follow his boss’ daughter around whenever she was going to university classes or going out into the city. It sounded easy enough. The head security guard explained it all to Eddie as they were walking towards the workers’ quarters which held everyone’s uniform. Every person had a different style of black and gray clothing. Although the boss really wanted everyone to coordinate, he still wanted his people to look good — and most importantly, normal as they walked around in the city. So quickly, they gave the newest employee a dark gray suit and a black button-down shirt to wear, as well as a spacious room he could clean himself up in. It was the most dapper Eddie has looked in his entire life. He truly couldn’t comprehend the way his heart was so conflicted with how amazing and weird everything is.

After an hour, he got a knock on the door. It was the man who grabbed him by the shoulder earlier today. “So the Princess’ bodyguard, huh? Alotta pressure for the new kid,” the bleach blond man teased as he nodded his head to urge Eddie to follow him.

“I thought I would be doing all the shitty jobs or something,” Eddie laughed. “And to think I thought I was gonna need bodyguards with my dream job.”

“Did you wanna be a rockstar, Munson?” the man nudged his shoulder as he walked down the hall towards the stairs with Eddie. “Your hair sure gives it away.”

“Come on, man. I can tell you listen to freak rock music too. You have more piercings than me,” the younger man noted as he looked up to see nearly four piercings on the taller man’s ear.

It amazed Eddie how laid back everyone seemed to be when it was the house of such a powerful man. He has relationships with people all over the world: suppliers, other dealers, bankers, politicians. The Boss probably had enough connections to rival the President — maybe even the President was on his contact list too. Regardless, everything seemed to be so easy. Even talking to his peers was so much easier than talking to people at school.

“The boss gets tickets all the time to concerts all over the world. If you mention your birthday to him, he’ll probably fly you out to whoever is playing that night.”

“You’re shitting me,” Eddie gasped in disbelief as he walked down a large grand staircase.

“Not at all, he does it like every other year for people, helps the morale.” The man stopped in the middle of the foyer where the front door was. “The name’s Garcia, by the way. I used to be the Princess’ bodyguard when she was a kid. But, now we all just take on different shifts.”

“Oh, so it’ll just be now?” Eddie wondered.

Garcia began to fix the folds of Eddie’s jacket, and ensured that no lint could be seen. For some reason, the former Hawkins resident felt like he gained two father figures today. “Yes, the boss wants one person to be head of her security detail. He was looking for someone her age too to make things less awkward if she had a man trailing next to her, or behind her in public.”

“Cool, cool. Do I get a weapon or something? Like a stick or taser?” Eddie asked with focus and concern in his eyes.

“You’ll get a taser, and we’ll teach you how to fight. But, honestly, you probably won’t need it,” Garcia smiled as he began to walk towards the library.

“Why not? I feel like the Boss is Batman or something and has cool weapons,” Eddie followed behind with quick steps. “Oh—”

For a moment, Garcia stopped in front of the library doors. He looked at Eddie’s appearance one last time before knocking on the wood. Just like the rest of the house, even the mahogany door was grand, with gold decals of a family crest and door handles bigger than a regular person’s thigh.

Everything is so beautiful, so nice, so calm. As he heard footsteps from the other side of the door, Eddie genuinely had high hopes that this was going to be one of the most easy-going jobs he has ever had. There would be no more running away from the police or sneaking around to get five dollars. However, he spoke a little too early, because everything was just the calm before the storm that ignited in his heart. As the library doors opened, Eddie’s heart raced at a million miles a minute; something it had not done in about an hour or so.

There you were, the girl in front of the building who he bumped into. The girl he thought about as the most beautiful thing he has seen today — and it was only confirmed as he saw your eyes reflect the gold on the door. You are the reason behind his whole job. You are the princess.

You’re his princess.

“Mr. Garcia, you didn’t need to knock,” you quietly chuckled. “Would you like to — it’s you.”

Eddie and you stared at one another for a few moments before Garcia spoke up to break the silent tension. “This is your new bodyguard, Eddie Munson. He’ll be escorting you to and from your university classes, as well as any time you need to go out of the house.”

“All of the time?” you asked, inviting the two people into the library.

“Yes, your father is going to need a larger security personnel for the next little while so we believe that one person to watch over you would be good,” Garcia smiled at you, before elbowing Eddie.

“It’s an honour to serve you, m-miss.” The brunette wasn’t sure what to call you. Especially as you were surrounded by the beautiful books that he could only dream of reading, he wasn’t able to just call you the love of his life so prematurely.

You giggled politely as you sat at the large table. Truthfully, you had to regain a bit of balance after having a slight shock of getting such a handsome person to join your father’s employees. Not that anyone was ugly; however, most of the people hired were older than you by many years. This was the first person you’ve met in any situation in your life who has made your heart feel so warm for so long. Earlier, you came to the library to hide away and try to subside your feelings with some studying. But, it looks like that’s not going to happen for a while.

Maybe after this little meeting, you need to take a shower to scream into the abyss for a bit.

For now, you would have to keep up appearances.

“Mr. Munson, you don’t need to call me such a formal name. If you can think of a nickname, then I would prefer that,” you smiled.

“Then, how about you call me Eddie?” The man thought for a second before speaking aloud again. “And I can call you Princess.”

The lines between your eyebrows became more prominent as you gasped in slight disbelief. “Mr. Garcia, have you already called me that in front of him?” you pouted, making Eddie blush at the soft sound of your voice.

“It suits you,” the older man chuckled. “Anyways, I should get going. How about you two mingle and get to know each other?”

And with that, you and Eddie were left alone in the library. It’ll be the first of countless moments alone together; however, this one will be the one of the most memorable. As you didn’t realize that your hearts were beating as one in this vast library full of stories of love, friendship, and adventures beyond compare. Just like the one you were about to start with a few words. “Would you like to sit and read with me?” you asked quietly, looking up at him with a small smile.

“As long as you have some good books, then I’ll be quiet for at least an hour,” he said with a slightly teasing tone that resonated through your body.

“The wall closest to the globe contains all the science fiction, fantasy, and adventure book genres,” you replied, as if you already knew him.

Eddie was really going to love it here. It was the peace he needed after this Hell adjacent week.

-:-:-:-:-

Over the next few weeks, the on-boarding process began for Eddie. In the early morning he would need to wake up before the sun even rose, in order to go through hours of training in case of emergencies. Being one to skip gym class because it felt pointless, Eddie felt like he was about to pass out at the end of each session with the various trainers. However, when it came to the moment you would greet him a good morning during breakfast — he swears that all of the body aches would go away in only a few syllables.

A routine was set for the two of you: breakfast, drive to campus for any lectures, run any errands that were necessary, then head home to study some more and relax. If you were cooped up in one area of the house for the night, Eddie would be dismissed to train some more. For some reason, it felt like he was being trained to protect a royal. So he often wondered just how powerful your family is. He notices that everyday, you were always dressed in the finest fabrics, whilst your other classmates would be dressed in regular clothing. Or even the food served in the house to all workers and the family, was nicer than anything he had back home — there was a time you ate an apple and it looked right out of a magazine. But, the craziest thing was that whenever you walked into a store to buy something small for yourself, or a gift for someone else; the entire store would be shut down even if you gave no warning in advance. If this was the influence you had, Eddie could barely imagine what it would be like if you were shopping alongside your father.

So maybe the training on how to swim better, fight at least three guys at once, first aid, and tricks to ensure that the car was never followed, was not exactly unnecessary at all. Not like gym class was, at least. Going from Hawkins to here was such a huge hurdle to get past physically.

But, every day would end off with you smiling at him before you fell asleep, and the former Dealer swears that it’s all worth it for that sweet moment.

“I’m going to head to bed now, Eddie. Hope your training went well,” you said as he was leaving the fitness area your father built.

“Right, u-uhm, let me know if you need anything then,” he breathed out.

“Everything should be fine. As long as you don’t accidentally blast Black Sabbath like you did the other night,” you giggled sweetly.

Three nights ago, when he hit the gym and thought everyone was asleep, Eddie started playing music on the stereo; however, the play button is right next to the button that is attached to every speaker in the house. Well, let’s just say that not everyone wants to wake up at two in the morning to Ozzy’s voice like a clock alarm that didn’t stop ringing. Luckily, the boss wasn’t home to stomp around the house to turn off the music, or else Eddie probably would not have a job at this very moment.

“No music tonight, I gotta be on high alert with everyone away,” Eddie chuckled as he started to walk you to your bedroom.

“Only in your first month and you’re already head security for the house tonight,” you nudged his shoulder lightly.

“That’s only because they’re all at that meeting with your father’s associates. I’m kinda freaking out over here, Princess.”

In truth, there were times your father would make you go to another state during these meetings. He always feared that someone would target the house while he was away. But, after years of secretive missions and being on the good side of the majority of the competitors, the fear went away. Regardless, Eddie was still on edge right now. “You’ll be just fine. I promise not to do anything drastic for the next twelve hours,” you offered the man next to you a sweet smile which he treasured.

“No jumping from balcony to balcony, or reaching high shelves, or using scissors that are too sharp.” Eddie sarcastically said as the two of you reached your bedroom door.

“I’ll try my best not to do that,” you giggled as you opened the door to your room slowly. The handle was held tightly in your hand, almost like you were anxious to do something. Your bodyguard noticed it, but brushed it off as nerves regarding an exam you’ve been studying for. “Good night, Mr. Mu—Eddie.”

“Sweet dreams, Princess.”

With that, you closed the door behind you and Eddie was left on his lonesome to walk towards the security footage room to watch over the cameras for the night. Even during regular days, not much would happen in the first place. You were always one to stay in your room to study and spend most of the evening, maybe head to the library to use the new computer and printer down there, or sit in the terrace to paint. In truth, the most dangerous situation you could possibly put yourself in is a really bad paper cut, or whenever you cut up fruit in the kitchen — even then, you would use a regular dinner knife so the chance of injury was minimal. Overall, Eddie thought his job was pretty easy. Although, a part of him misses chasing the rockstar dream; but, this is more than enough thrill whilst he kept a low profile.

Tonight, he was even told to just sit in the security room and just make rounds every hour to see if you and the other workers in the house were alright. But, it was when he heard a weird cry echoing from the window, the man looked outside to see what could be happening. It sounded like a pattern of cries and groans coming from above: your room to be exact.

Fuck.

Of course, the one time he’s left in charge, you got yourself hurt. Eddie was already preparing himself for the berating from the head security guards for letting the precious daughter of the Boss to be wounded in her own room. And so, with a slight panic, he began to run up the stairs and head to your room at the end of the hall. The door was closed and there wasn’t any glow of a light being on from behind the door. But, the sounds were getting louder, there was even a repetitive creaking noise. Could you be in so much agony that you were trembling on the bed? The worst thoughts ran through Eddie’s head as he reached for the door handle and twisted it open.

It was dark, only the soft glow of a lava lamp barely lighting the room and reflecting on your soft skin. For a moment, Eddie had to squint to see the whole visual. When he did, he swore his heart dropped.

There you were, like a glowing goddess, straddling a pillow, naked, and rocking against it harshly. Your hands were on the headboard for more leverage, causing it to hit the wall furthest away from the door. Just seeing your back was already enough for Eddie to feel weak at his knees. If he moved his head slightly, he could see your reflection in the mirror next to your bed, which showed a very focused face. Combine that with the sound of soft moans and whimpers echoing through the air. It was a sight for sore eyes.

What made the image a thousand times more pornographic was the slight hum coming from your bed. It was a bit mechanical and had a slight pattern to it too that sounded familiar to Eddie.

He really wasn’t sure what to do in this situation. There was one side of him that told him to walk away and forget about it. It’s not like he was an angel every other night before bed too. But, God, he knows that you have never been on a date or had a boyfriend before — you admitted it once when he joked around with you in the car, asking if he needed to third wheel any date that you are asked out on. But, you profusely said no and that he doesn’t need to prepare for that since it has never happened yet and may not happen for a while. The dirtiest of thoughts ran through Eddie’s mind as he thought about how sweet you were, and how you were absolutely losing your calm demeanor as you continued to hump and moan atop your bed. He began to wonder what it would be like to help you out with your little workout. You seemed to be a bit frustrated; whispering ‘it’s not working’ over and over.

Eddie would definitely help you make it work, there was no doubt about that. However, that would cross more lines than an HR department could even think of. So, he moved away slowly; however, the sound of the floorboards creaking echoed so loudly that it made you and him freeze every muscle in your bodies.

Something in you said to grab your blanket and put it over your shoulders; whilst Eddie’s body seemed to think for itself. Instead of running away and pretending that nothing happened, he walked into your room, making sure to close the door quietly afterwards.

“Does daddy know about your little toy?” he said, walking towards the bed.

“E-Eddie—” you gasped, turning your body around to catch his eye before freezing in place. The pillow between your legs was being squished so much that it caused the little piece of vibrating plastic to press firmly on your clit beautifully.

You didn’t know whether to cry out of embarrassment or scream from the pure ecstasy of the moment.

“And here I thought you were hurt. Your cries could be heard all the way downstairs. But they don’t seem like bad ones,” the chuckle that escaped his throat was deep and resonated throughout your entire body.

“You heard?” it was barely a whisper that fell from your lips. Your eyes followed his figure as he came to kneel next to your bed. Although you were covering yourself with a blanket; you still felt so exposed, yet excited simultaneously.

The man looked up at you as he placed a gentle hand on your exposed left thigh. “Next time, don’t open your window when you wanna be a naughty girl.”

It was all Eddie's fault in your opinion. Honestly, ever since he began working for your father, things have been the opposite of normal. The other bodyguards would drive you to college to attend whatever class was on the schedule, then drive you home so that you didn’t need to take a taxi. Maybe they would bring you to the store if you needed to buy school supplies or a gift for someone’s birthday. But, other than that, you were content with the schedule that you had gotten used to. All of them were old, close to your father’s age, and boring — to be completely frank. However, when you were eating breakfast one day and your father mentioned the news of wanting a new bodyguard on the roster, there was no inkling in your mind that he was going to be hiring someone who was your age. No need to get started on the way all the heat in your body rushed to your face when you first saw him. Anyways, the way you always choked on your cereal whenever Eddie would walk into the dining room everyday to greet you with a good morning before telling you it was time to leave, was more than enough of a reaction to prove that you had a tiny crush on the man.

Eddie just had to call you ‘Princess’ jokingly, brush his hand on your waist whenever he needed to guide you around, whisper quietly in your ear when you two were walking to the car — as if he couldn’t say it out loud like a normal person. Every single one of those actions were so sweet, something you had never experienced before. He was so different than your sheltered-self, and you easily fell for the care-free man who acted as mature as possible when the other security guards were around.

For countless nights you wondered what it would be like if his hands brushed a little lower than your waist, or if he could call you sweet pet names in different scenarios. Mostly, you dreamt about him being your ride home in more ways than one.

It was so perverted to even think of someone like that, let alone a man who worked for your father. But, you wanted to feel good, needed it even. So many of your friends talked about hooking up with different guys across campus and how it helped with stress-relief during exams. A part of you wished you had the courage to call Eddie over to help you during your study breaks. Instead, you chose to fill your free time with a romance book and the toy a friend gave you last week.

Guilt started to build within you now. Your thoughts were so impure, your actions even more so. But, what made you feel guiltiest of all was that you were caught in the act the very first time you decided to commit the act in the first place.

“I-I’m so sorry,” you whispered, noticing that he moved to sit on the bed facing you.

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” he said sweetly. Eddie put a soft hand on your chin to try and get you to look him in the eye. But, truly, he wanted to see how beautiful they could be with the moonlight in them.

Pushing yourself back, you moved from his touch. “This is so embarrassing.”

It became more embarrassing when the sound of vibrations suddenly became louder and stronger because of the change in angle. You felt the impact right on your sensitive clit. It became a lot more painful to keep down just how good you were starting to truly feel. Eddie’s touch only helped you reach your end goal faster.

The man in front of you had the same thought, but decided to tease you sweetly. “Why so? Is it because I caught you? No, I think you like that, sweet girl,” he said whilst inching his face closer to yours, a calloused hand massaging your left thigh simultaneously. “Or is it because you’ve been trying to make yourself cum all night with no avail?”

“How did you—”

“Oh, I would know. There was no scream, no muffled noises of you moaning into your pillow, no heavy breaths that went silent for a moment. Look at you now, you didn’t even take your pretty pussy off this toy the second you saw me,” he said. His hand found its way to your inner thigh, barely touching your dripping heat. However, Eddie did feel the cotton of the pillow and how soaked it was from all your actions earlier tonight.

In truth, most of it was because of him. Not only the imaginary version in your perverted dreams; but also the continuous touches through the conversation that electrocuted all your senses and went straight to your pussy. Then, there was the fact that Eddie spoke with his lips so close to yours. Every syllable caused the lightest pressure on your glossy lips. Trying not to give in to both of your desires to lean in was the most difficult task of the night.

“Help me,” you whimpered, the vibrations from the toy getting stronger now.

“What was that?” he teased, a hand massaging further up your left thigh.

“Help me, Eddie. I need you to help me so badly.” The words fell from your lips desperately, sounding as if you were about to cry.

However, the man in front of you kissed your cheek sweetly before leaning back against the headboard. He noticed the way you shivered slightly at the cold air — your blanket only covering your chest and stomach mainly, as it fell from your shoulders a bit. Knowing that you were in such a naughty state in comparison to what you normally portrayed yourself as, was absolutely arousing to Eddie. He didn’t even hide his growing hardness beneath his black dress pants.

You have never thanked the tailor your father hired more in your entire life.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” he said in a deep tone.

“Well, I opened this toy today and read all the instructions,” you answered truthfully whilst clutching the blanket closer to your body. “After following everything to a tee, I still don’t think I’m doing this right.”

“You seemed to be having fun along the way,” he teased as he heard you whimper between some of your words.

“I suppose so,” you nodded along, moving your hips slightly as he spoke to you.

“So what’s stopping you?”

In truth, you were on the edge of three things: annoyance, an orgasm, and annoyance due to not having an orgasm. So your body tensed up a bit, causing the toy to be pressed up against your clit even more — it made you whine a bit as you said, “more like who.”

“Well, if it’s my fault I guess I have to help you now. It would be the gentlemanly thing to do,” Eddie teased, bringing up both hands to cup your face.

“Please,” you whispered.

Then, both of you leaned forward at once, capturing each other’s lips in a beautiful kiss that could hardly be seen as chaste. It was a kiss that had been waiting to happen for weeks. To say that this is what dreams were made of would be an understatement. For countless nights, Eddie has woken up in a sweat as he pictured your soft lips on his own, and other parts of his body too.

“You look like an angel, holy fuck,” Eddie whispered his thoughts aloud as he brought his right hand down to push the blanket away, whilst his right hand involuntarily started to move on its own to grasp your waist and urge it to move atop the vibrator.

“Feels nice when you do that,” you sweetly giggled and moaned.

“How do you like this?” He asked, squeezing your nipple between two fingers. “Such pretty tits, they’re begging to be sucked on. You’d like that, wouldn't you?”

“Y-yes, please.”

They’ve been hard all evening from a mixture of the cold and your intimate thoughts. However, just thinking about Eddie sucking on them was making you clench between your legs. Even these few moments with your bodyguard were much more successful in your pursuit of a climax than what you’ve experienced on your own.

“Always so polite,” he teased in a voice that vibrated through your body alongside the piece of plastic on your clit. Your hands were on his neck even as he moved down towards your breasts, noting how Eddie really enjoyed it when you lightly tugged on his hair.

“O-off, take this off,” you tugged on the back of his shirt this time.

“You know what you want, huh?”

“Y-yeah,” you said shyly as he sweetly teased you.

You had always admired Eddie’s tattoos and muscles. But that was something you saw under the flourescent lights of the gym. This time, as he sat in front of you with the glow of your lamp next to him — he was genuinely glowing. Plus, the fact that he was wearing extremely well-fitted pants made him look like he was right out of those fashion magazines where they tried to showcase the pants and abs of the model. Only, Eddie looked so much more god-like than them.

“Move your hips, doll. Come on, you can take it, I know you want that too,” the man whispered upon your lips after taking off his shirt and then moved his way down to kiss your hardened nipples.

“It’s so strong, you’re so strong,” referring to the toy’s strengthening vibrations and him. But, you let your body move on its own to whatever felt right.

The toy was doing a little pattern beneath you, so you moved forwards and backwards in order to see if you could match the intensity of it. Eddie got closer to you, his knee going on top of the pillow and right in between your legs. If he moved it an inch closer to your body, he would be able to move the toy slightly and see your reactions. And so, he did, in between kisses — wanting to drink up your moans of ecstasy, then massaging your tongue with his every time you gasped in pleasure.

This was the most intense moment you’ve ever experienced with another man. When you lost your virginity a few years ago, it was a one and done type of situation for the guy. While you laid there wanting to crave more, he told you how good you were, then left for the night. So later, even all of the times you’ve tried to use a shower head or your fingers, nothing has ever made you feel this way. You could nearly cry as the amount of vibrations going through your body increased.

Once Eddie began to kiss down your neck and you tugged the back of his hair without realizing it, he said, “feisty girl.”

“Can you please touch me there—ah,” you moaned as Eddie bit your neck

“I can’t do that, sweetheart. You have to do this for yourself. Give into all your needs and desires, self-pleasure is one of the greatest things in the world,” Eddie continued to tease you as his hands roamed your body.

When his hands landed on your hips, he started to help rock them for you. The vibrations felt so good that you started to tremble; however, something within you wanted so badly to see him shiver as well. So, you moved your own hands slowly — from his shoulders to his stomach, then brushed over his obvious hardness, all before landing on his thigh that was between your legs. “B-but, please —”

“So needy, huh?” Eddie could see the desperation in your nearly tear-filled eyes. “You’re soaking the pillow too.”

“Too strong,” you nearly screamed out as the man before you moved the pillow slightly to angle the toy on another part of your clit.

“Go on, you can do it, Princess.”

“Keep touching me, I need you to, please.” This time, you kissed his neck and began to suck on his pulse point; copying what he was doing to you earlier.

Fuck — you were going to kill him tonight. If not you, then the way he’s about to cum in his pants would surely knock him out.

“Will do, just keep going,” Eddie grunted before gently pulling you off of his neck in order to look you in the eyes. “Do what feels right. Tell me what you were doing before I came here,” he kissed you gently as you moaned into his mouth again since a wave of pleasure took over.

“I-I thought you were busy, then, I started reading this book. It talks about the couple h-having relations.”

“Sex?” he chuckled as you got shy now of all times.

“Yes, uh-uhm, and then I started to feel warm right here,” you grabbed his wrist and dragged it towards your core. Eddie knew exactly what you were doing.

“Oh, my naughty girl. This spot?”

With his ringed-fingers he brushed them over your clit quickly because you deserved a little treat. But, he went further down to touch the toy and move it close and away from your clit at a massaging pattern. He adored how wet you were, and it took every ounce of strength within the man not to lay you down and have a taste until you could orgasm in his mouth instead. Alas, that was for another time. For now, he would memorize the feeling of your slick pussy for when he took care of his problem later. For now, he would treasure every time you whimpered through swollen lips because it was his mouth that helped ruin your lipstick.

“Yes,” you whispered as you grasped his arm for balance. “And then I just put my toy on top of the pillow because my friends say they love using their pillow to r-ride.”

“Look at you, already a pro,” he teasingly smiled.

“Eddie,” you moaned louder as you grounded your hips against the toy and pillow. “I wanna ride you so bad. I’ve always wanted to try this position when I had sex for the first time, but the guy never let me,” you continued your little pillow humping confessional.

“He’s an asshole, I would let you ride me until your thighs gave in,” Eddie said with a jealous tone. He really shouldn’t have been because you weren’t his partner. You were also the most beautiful woman he has ever seen, the fact shouldn’t have surprised him so much. However, knowing that another man only wanted to focus on his own pleasure, made Eddie want to scoff.

Now, you can’t say the first guy was bad at all — he was just never able to get you to where you really needed to go. You never arched your back towards the ceiling because you couldn’t handle the throbbing between your legs; you never had to bite your lip to suppress a moan that would echo through the halls because he didn’t do much to make you be loud; you never scratched his back with your perfectly manicured nails because you needed to let out your waves of pleasure. Not with Eddie though, if anything, he was going to have a scratch or five on different parts of his skin for the next little while. You prayed that no one would notice it if they were training together; however, that was a worry for another time. All you wanted to think about now were the upcoming vibrations and how it would feel when you orgasm for the first time.

“Will you cum with me, Eddie? I’m so lonely,” you pouted, wanting him to feel pleasure just as much as you were.

“Keep going, just like that,” Eddie nodded, then leaned back onto the headboard to admire you in the final minutes before your climax.

The whine from your throat hurt the man as you didn’t feel the warmth of his skin anymore. You leaned your hands on the pillow for leverage, moving your hips harshly to feel an immense level of pleasure in front of him. But, you craved Eddie’s touch so badly that you bit your lip and rested a hand on his knee and squeezed it every time the vibrations became too much.

“Help,” you whispered.

“God, you’re so beautiful like this,” Eddie groaned as he massaged his hand over his clothed-hardness. “Is your pussy throbbing while you ride your pretty little toy?”

“So much,” the whimper fell from your lips as you continued to slowly thrust against the toy imagining what it would be like if it was Eddie beneath you and not a small piece of plastic.

“I can't wait until I stretch you out. You’d take me like a champ.”

Right then, Eddie unbuckled his pants just enough for you to see that he hadn’t been wearing any boxers beneath. The trail of hair leading towards his hardness was tantalizing, nearly a guide along with his muscles to point to the place you were so curious about.

Once he noticed that you were hypnotized at the thought of what was going to happen next, the man in front of you stopped his movements to look you in the eyes then roam them down to your core. You got the message and wanted to give your bodyguard a little show. With confidence taking over your body, you sat back up and put both hands on your thighs. Eddie swears that this was a pose right out of his favourite porn magazine — only you looked a thousand times better with swollen lips and sweat glistening your skin in the dimly-lit room.

“I’d like that a lot,” you whispered in between bounces.

“Prove it for me, squeeze your tits for me,” Eddie urged you to do so, moving his hands to push his dress pants further down. Just the short glimpse of his cock was enough motivation for you to touch your hardened nipples in front of him.

“Oh, oh,” you giggled at how good it felt.

“Feels nice, right?” the man in front of you finally put his hands around his cock and you swear your mouth started to water at the sight.

Throughout your life, you always giggled alongside any friends at a party who mentioned hookups or flings — all you could ever do was imagine how things looked and felt though, since most of what you did with your previous partner was in the dark and done quickly in the middle of the night. Never once did you think that they were being honest when they talked about the length and girth of the different members they’ve seen.

Oh, how wrong you were.

Now, as you stared at Eddie in awe of the size of him, you were so wrong to think that they could be exaggerating. Some guys really did have the cock that dirty dreams were made of. As Eddie massaged himself in front of you, you noticed the small details about him. From the colour, to the vein, to the way his balls looked so squishy and large as they laid on his thighs. Fuck, you really did feel like a pervert staring at it for so long and imagining how it would feel like if he was stretching you out right now. Instead, your pussy throbbed at the thought, making you knead your breasts harder and push yourself further upon the vibrator beneath you.

“I think I like your mouth more,” you said in your trance, knowing your fingers weren’t as soft as his tongue.

“Fuck,” Eddie whimpered as he marched his hands’ movements with your bounces on the pillow. “Are you close?”

“Yeah, I think so—ah,” you reached one hand to lay on his knee for leverage as he moved closer to you so that he could massage your thigh with his free hand.

“That’s it, pretty girl. Come all over your pillow and you’ll get a kiss,” Eddie’s breath tingled on your lips as he teased you, his mouth so close to yours whilst his hand got closer to your core.

You pouted as he began to kiss your cheek and neck but never your needy lips. But, you didn’t have time to be slightly sad, as you felt Eddie’s fingers reach your centre and push the toy onto you. Moans and whines fell from your throat simultaneously as everything began to work in tandem to make you climax — one that you’ve been craving for so long.

“It’s too much,” you whispered as you felt yourself clench harder and harder, as if your body was getting ready for something.

“Almost there,” Eddie said in a deep voice into your ear. “I got you,” he said as he pushed it again and again, trying to match it with the hand on his cock.

The man was so close to orgasming right now, his imagination allowing him to feel your slickness on him. Eddie was chanting a prayer in his head that he could hold on until you came first. In truth, he wanted the image of you finding the climax of your pleasure to be burned into his brain forever. And so, he did everything he could to help you get there — you so desperately needed it. With kisses to your neck, his hand now on your hip to help you ride out your incoming orgasm; you came. Hard.

Moans of ecstasy filled the room as you found your bliss next to him. Eddie made the fist around his cock harder to imagine it was you who was clenching around him right now. Then, your voice whispered above him.

“Kiss me, please—”

“So good, so beautiful,” Eddie obliged happily. “Fuck, how are you glowing right now?”

“Eddie, more,” you begged into his lips.

“I-I, fuck , you’re—” it was Eddie’s turn to become incoherent as he could feel his climax coming.

You smiled on his lips, slowing your own movements now to watch him. “Are you gonna cum for me too, Eddie?”

That was it.

One look in your eyes and those words falling from your lips was more than enough for him to cum in his hand. You both stayed there, sitting up and kissing each other’s lips sweetly as you both basked in the post-climax bliss.

Eddie thanked God that you had a pretty tissue box on your bedside table, which he was able to use to clean himself up a bit, before holding your face as he kissed you. He noticed that you kept on whimpering and moaning into the kiss still; however, you tried to lift your body up from the pillow. You were so sensitive down there now, that although the vibrations felt so nice, you were getting a bit tired from the previous experience.

So, with one hand, Eddie took out the toy from underneath you and turned it off whilst still kissing you.

“I’ve dreamed about this a million times before and it’s better than I ever could have imagined,” he said into your lips, and then looked down to see the little pink piece of plastic that brought you to orgasm. It was soaked with all your juices, and Eddie’s intrusive thoughts told him to have a taste. But your soft voice brought him out of a haze.

“You dream about me?”

“Every night,” he smiled before laying the toy on the bedside table and involuntarily licking one of his fingers.

“Am I dreaming now?” you lightly gasped at his actions.

The man savoured the taste quickly before kissing you again and laying you down on the fluffy pillows. “Not at all.”

As you lay on the bed on top of light grey sheets, Eddie swears that you are officially the closest to an angel he has ever stood near. The soft light reflecting on your sheets and skin made you look like you were glowing, with a halo on your head as you basked in the post-orgasmic bliss. The moment you looked up at him with soft eyes, he promised himself that he would do anything to experience this moment over and over.

With a touch to the side of his face, you smiled at the way his eyes focused on everything about you, just as you did the same. “Would what we did tonight happen in a wet dream? Because it sure does feel that way,” you giggled as you got comfortable with him laying slightly on top of you.

“Well, then let me help clean you up,” Eddie kissed you deeply again, adoring the way this angle allowed him to hold your body, and feel every time you arched your back up slightly to feel each other’s skin again. When you moaned into his mouth after he squeezed your ass gently, Eddie smiled against your lips.

“I can grab a towel from the washroom,” you whispered as he moved down to kiss your neck, a move he found you loved so much that it made your hips meet up to massage your heat against his thigh for some semblance of extra relief.

“No, no, we don’t need that just yet,” he mentioned as his voice vibrated through your entire body. The second the words were said, Eddie began to allow his lips to roam down your body, kissing your stomach before looking up at you. “Because I’ve dreamed about kissing you in one other place, only if you would want me to, of course.”

It was in that moment that you both realized that dreams had their own way of coming true, and it was all part of fate's plan. If someone were to tell the former Dealer that after years of living in a town he wanted to run away from, he was able to do so and find a high-job, he would never believe you. If the reason he was able to find someone he found peace with, was all because of a slip of paper with an address, he would never believe you. That although, right now, as you lay in bed with him, he thought he was going to wake up from one of the greatest dreams he has ever had. Yet, he wasn't dreaming in the slightest. This was his real life, a life he was able to treasure all thanks to a book he found in a cabin on the lake.

-:-:-:-:-

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iamzer0 · 8 months ago

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What I think Black Butler characters would be as your parents(°▽°)

𝓢𝓮𝓫𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷

You would most likely be a demon that he adopted, I believe that demons just sorta pop up in hell and being a hell born is kinda uncommon. He found you in hell wailing, seeing you sparked a parental instinct in him. You warmed his cold heart.

He would be a strict but caring father, he tried to raise you to be a strong demon able to handle yourself when you fled the nest.

He would take you along in his contracts he says it’s to train you but it’s really to keep an eye on you. I feel like you would be like grell when she was learning to be a butler, making mistakes and overall being clumsy.

He would lightly reprimand you and then swiftly clean up your mess and teach you how to do it properly, honestly he would be a good father to you, trying to train you to the best of his ability.

He would go with you when you on your first few contracts, he would say he wants to make sure your doing this right but really he doesn’t want you to leave the nest just yet.

Even when you became capable of taking care of yourself and your master, he would visit you as often as possible. He would seem overbearing to you but he is just a protective father.

If it’s a long contract like ciel’s, he would randomly drop in during a night he is not busy, to visit you and see how your latest contract is going.

He’s a good father, he makes sure you become a strong and capable demon. He is one of those parents that is like “are you positive you are ready to move out?” overall he is a great father.

𝐶𝑖𝑒𝑙

I think you be a child from one of his distant family members, the only reason he knew you existed was he heard your parents sadly died. He heard that you would go to an orphanage and felt his heart pang in sadness. So after thinking bout it he decided to take you in.

I feel like he would come off as a cold, distant parent but he had a soft spot for you. After the public found out about you he became much more protective, worried that you would be kidnapped and used against him.

He would have Sebastian help raise you as he is young and doesn’t know how to raise kids. He would try and raise you to be civil and live up to the phantomhive name.

When Elizabeth found out about you she was all over you, buying you outfits and toys playing dress up with you and making ciel play with you telling him he needs to be attentive.

I think you would sleep in the same bed as him a lot, not that he would mind. He would try and be there for you but sometimes he just doesn’t know what to say or do.

He would either have Sebastian homeschool you or send you to an elite private school. He wants you to be well educated.

When you got older he would reveal to you the truth about Sebastian, which would lead to some tears from you.

He try’s to be a good father to you, he genuinely cares about you and wants you to succeed in life.

𝗯𝗮𝗿𝗱

You are his biological kid for a past relationship, he heard the news of your mother’s death he didn’t want you to end up in an orphanage you are his kid, so he took you in.

He would raise you to be strong, teaching you how to use a gun at a young age. He wants you to be able to take care of yourself when he’s not there.

I think you would end up being a good cook which he says is because of him but we all know it isn’t.

He would be a goofy father, making jokes often. He wants to be there for you making sure you have a good future. You may not be the most educated person in the world but you would have a good heart.

Would have the most insane dad lore and would randomly drop the most insane fact about himself so casually.

ᖴIᑎᑎY

You are most likely a distant member of his family (he’s to nervous to even get near the topic of having kids) after hearing our parents died his heart broke for you he decided to take you in.

He would be the sweetest father ever, you would grow up to be kind like him. He would be really nervous he’s never raised someone so he’s always wore he’s doing the wrong thing.

He would be so cautious with you worried he might hurt you with his strength. He might be too excited and accidentally hiring you he would be a wreck, crying, apologizing profusely.

You would grow up to be strong and a kind person like your father, he would be so proud if you grow up to be someone up there in the world.

𝙼𝚎𝚢-𝚛𝚒𝚗

You are a random orphan she found starving and crying in a basket in some alleyway, she would take you in feeling like you needed a good home.

She would try and be a good mom but she doesn’t know how to take care of kids that well she is nervous like Finny worried she might mess something up.

She would try and give you an education, wanting you to live a good life. She would be a vey sweet and chaotic mom, making messes but always being there for you.

She would raise you to be a respectful well rounded person, I can see her crying at all of your birthdays and events saying “they grow up so fast”

This is part 1, part 2 with be the trancy manor and the reapers! I hope you all had a amazing day remember to drink water bye bye ٩( ᐛ )و

#black butler #black butler headcanons #ciel phantomhive #headcanon #kuroshitsuji #sebastian michaelis #fanfic #lol

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kulemiwrites · 23 days ago

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Akira Nishikiyama | KURO ii

Part: ii of ii (KURO, Shiro series) Part one can be found here. Genre: Angst, Romance, SMUT Rating: 18+ Word count: 9k, sowwy (^人^) Character(s): Akira Nishikiyama, fem!Reader

Warning: This part is not only almost double the length of the previous one but it's also alot heavier. It's angsty as hell but also, just sorta intense emotionally. (At least, that's my interpretation. If I did my job right, ya know jhdsbfs) Anyway, you've warned 😘

Note: Technically a part of Repost Sunday but Kuro, Shiro is one of my all time favorites of anything I've written. So, when I was going back to proofread, I noticed some things I wanted to do differently. So, it's mostly the same but some paragraphs have been heavily modified, added or removed entirely 🤭 I couldn't help myself!

Read on AO3

Your fingertips lightly traced the edges of the flat white box, careful not to leave fingerprints. It was alarming in size– your thighs were hidden beneath the width of it. Your eyes studied the golden emblem that was etched into the box as your fingers idly toyed with an end of the black satin bow. There was something awfully familiar about it but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t place it. Finally, you tugged the ribbon and it elegantly unraveled almost perfectly off the sides of the box.

Plucking the remaining corner of ribbon away, your nail gently scraped against the gold, making you shudder- the sound and feeling almost as unpleasant as dragging your nails against a chalkboard.

There it was commanding your attention once more but still, you were at all loss. You were certain you were unfamiliar with the brand.

It definitely wasn’t something you’d find in the shops near your small town and if the packaging was anything to go by, the price tag was nothing to sneeze at. That, and… having been a gift from Nishikiyama-- Well, that just confirmed your suspicions.

“One… Two…Three…” you whispered, lifting away the top, revealing a sheet of gold gift tissue paper and a piece of cardstock, the size of a standard business card. It was a note:

In case you’ve forgotten,

Kamurocho is chilly this month.

-Akira

You smiled, removed the tissue and you couldn’t believe your eyes. Just one look and it suddenly came rushing back.

“How could he have…” you muttered, removing the beautiful coat that you’d been eyeballing for months now.

You got monthly catalogs from all over the place. You enjoyed sifting through them, highlighting the pretty things you liked most but you never made much of an effort to actually order them. You’d leave stacks of catalogs folded open on the table never to be peeked at again and once the next month’s issues came in, you’d toss the old ones out with the trash.

It was an endless cycle but what could you say? You were a creature of habit.

It was just like Nishikiyama to spoil you with something as expensive as this; then present it in such a nonchalant way. Some things never change, you thought and you found strange comfort in that.

You were impressed but it simultaneously made you question the evolution of your style over the years. Had it stayed the same? Did he choose it because it was something he wanted to see you in or was this just a strange coincidence?

As you began to get yourself ready for the evening, you thought about your old friends.

When you were kids, you never would have imagined that the years could be capable of ripping you apart so harshly. How was it that a band of friends that chose one another as family, could wind up becoming a bunch of strangers in the end? You’d known only snippets of their lives now: the news was your source when you found out about Kiryu being in prison for murder as well Nishikiyama’s reputation as a ruthless patriarch; the grapevine filled you in on Yumi’s disappearance and Yuko’s passing.

It hurt your heart.

No, the years had not been very kind to your old friends. Sometimes, you felt guilty for growing to live such a peaceful life, at least compared to the others. Wasn’t suffering the fate of the Sunflower kids? How did that fate pass over you?

Thinking back on it all almost always gave you a headache. Nothing made any sense, or rather you refused to accept that it made any sense. The thing you questioned most though, was how you went from being Akira’s entire world to a complete no one to him overnight?

You often thought, if that was the step he needed to take to land himself where he was today and if he was happy– truly happy, then you supposed you had to accept being an unfortunate casualty.

Even so, the sentiment never changed. The yakuza life was not the path you wanted for him but it was the one he chose. You respected that, but knowing he was climbing the Tojo ladder alone, terrified you. You didn’t have to be steeped in it to know that was a lonely life to lead. The men that walked that path had to live fast and often die young. Even as a patriarch having men willing to die in his place, there was no guarantee that he’d be safe from that.

You often wished that he would upset the balance and create a new world for yakuza. You wanted him to lead the Tojo Clan someday– you knew what a title like that would mean to him but there were stipulations for your dream and one of those included becoming the longest living chairman of all time. Well respected, old and far past gray, proudly brandishing a wrinkled koi on his back as he looked down at the organization that he led to thrive for decades with zero bloodshed!

But, that wasn’t realistic and the true optics were… not great.

In the end, it was a criminal organization not an arts and crafts club.

Denying the facts was a lot easier than facing them head on. You hoped that meeting him again would force you to accept reality as well as get the answers you’ve asked yourself for years.

You checked yourself out in the mirror and with your own nod of approval, you turned on your heels to go and meet your chauffeur.

Your gaze was laser focused on the glowing floor indicator and you flinched at the slightest bump in the ride up to the penthouse. In Nishikiyama’s letter, he’d stressed that this wasn’t a place he frequented as a way to ease your nerves. There was no need to be afraid or worry about prying eyes. He even appointed your own security detail: a chauffeur and a bodyguard whose jobs were to not let you out of their sight.

Akira put a lot more thought into ensuring your safety and privacy, more than you might have done on your own. You were grateful to him for it, of course but you couldn’t help the unease you felt next to the huge, suited gentleman who was guiding you to the rendezvous point.

He opened the door and gestured for you to enter but he didn’t pass the threshold himself.

“Here you are, Miss. The boss will arrive in exactly fifteen minutes. Shall I send someone to tend the bar while you wait?”

You shook your head, far too nervous to drink.

“Very well. The boss asks that you make yourself comfortable. He encourages you to explore the place if you’d like and of course, if you need me, I’ll be just outside this door.”

“Right… Thank you, sir.”

“No need, Miss. Please, excuse me.”

You watched the man close the door and once he was no longer in your sight, the anxiety of the inevitable set it. Maybe you’d take him up on his suggestion to peek around the place?

There weren’t words strong enough in your vocabulary to describe how impressed you were with the interior design. A little dated now, but there was a version of you that would’ve melted at the thought of calling a place like this home. You were almost envious of your ex because the more you examined it, the more it felt like a callback to a scrapbook you made some time before the split, prophesying your future living arrangements if the two of you ever decided to officially grow old together.

He was always so passive when you’d show the pages you completed to him, it left you believing that he simply wasn’t a fan of your taste.

You wanted to delve in further but the less you could see the exit the more your head would spin. Your legs even began to stiffen from nerves. You stumbled over to the seating area, across from the bar the bodyguard mentioned and sank into the cool leather sofa.

Fifteen minutes felt much more like fifteen hours, and anxiety wasted no time in working its dark magic on you. You started to wonder if you’d made the right decision by being there. You hadn’t prepared a single word to say or thought about how to behave. You weren’t sure where you even stood emotionally: were you thrilled? Angry? Then, there was the question of how would he behave? Would he speak to you like the stranger you had become?

You had seen fuzzy photos of his side profile in the newspaper and you could tell that he was still as handsome as you remembered. What would he think when he took a look at you?

But the most important question of all was, did he still hate you?

The sound of the twisting door knob snapped you out of your daze and made your stomach turn. You couldn’t yet see him past the entryway but you heard his shoes click against the floor tiles.

Click, clack…. Click, clack….. Click, clack…

You quickly shot to your feet and immediately debated if that was the right move.

How do you greet a patriarch? Was there protocol? Does that protocol extend to you as a civilian, and ex-girlfriend of said patriarch?

You straightened out the cuffs of your coat and the hem of your dress with shaky hands and your tongue flailed in your cottonmouth. Then, you hid your hands in the pockets as you took a single step forward to meet him at the entryway.

His deep voice rang through the open space and sent chills down your spine, “Sit. It’s fine.” he said, voice deliberately softening on ‘fine’ as if trying to quickly amend for the harshness of ‘sit’.

“O-oh, okay.” you stuttered, jelly legs finally giving way and awkwardly flopping you down to the sofa.

He was slow in his stroll, unbuttoning his white coat and loosening his tie. Your eyes met his for the first time in nearly a decade and you felt butterflies. It was then that you realized that there was no more denying it, he had changed. It was in everything from the sharpness of his gaze to the pomade in his hair, the rolling swagger in his gait and even his choice of black gator oxfords.

He shrugged off the coat and draped it over the back of the living chair he sat on the arm of, cross-legged as he stared at you in silence.

Thick, deafening silence.

And in searching his eyes for his next move, your vision instead grew blurry at the painful realization that you could no longer read him. You bowed your head as the tears raced down your cheeks.

Blank– perfectly expressionless, he watched on as you choked back a frustrated sob and when you could finally muster the strength to meet his eye again, he simply pointed at the end table holding a box of tissues next to you.

You wondered if they were always there or had he placed them there for the purpose of this meeting. You ripped out a few to dry your tears then looked back to him with puffy eyes and a weak smile.

He stroked his chin with his thumb and for a brief, very brief moment, you witnessed a crack in the façade. There was pain– guilt even, that same micro expression of self-doubt each time he’d make you cry in the past.

“Hi.” you managed.

“...Hey.”

The thumb he used to rub his chin was now bent while he bit into the knuckle, staring down at his lap. This was not a mannerism that you were familiar with and it annoyed you that you couldn’t quite tell what it meant.

You replaced the feeling of annoyance with one of false confidence, “Well? You’ve called me all the way here… Aren’t you going to talk to me at least?”

His head jerked at your tone, his brows pinched tightly but you refused to falter under his glare. It was that that caused the look of anger on his face to dissipate into something much gentler. It wasn’t even that he was upset, he was more shocked than anything. He wasn’t used to anyone speaking to him that way anymore, especially not women.

He briefly looked at his hands, rubbed them on his pants to wipe away the sweat collecting on his palms then he stood to his feet.

“Care for a drink?” he asked, walking to the bar without waiting for a response.

You watched him navigate the bar after he folded his shirt sleeves to the elbow, tuning out the clanging of glass as you tried to peer into his mind. Was it that the reunion was tense or had he just become a man who only lived in his head? If these were the old days you might’ve assumed that, just like you, he hadn’t planned a single word to say.

He sat your beverage on the table then sat down with his own. This time, in the actual seat.

“I wasn’t sure if you still drank that or not.” he said, nodding toward the glass filled with the last thing he remembered as your drink of choice. “But I made sure I had some for today… For you.”

Though he spoke of a thoughtful gesture, there wasn’t an ounce of sentiment in his voice. You stared at the glass quietly as he began to sip from his own.

“What’s your problem?” he asked harshly. “You saw me make it. You don’t think I put something in it, do you?”

Unbothered by his tone, you stared him down as you took a generous gulp of the drink. You licked away the droplets above your upper lip and returned it to the coaster.

“I told you that I trusted you. I’m here because I chose to trust you and I’ll continue to trust you while in your care until you prove that doing so was a mistake! Couldn’t you have just considered that maybe I’m extremely nervous?”

The corners of his mouth quivered and his eyes finally softened. You’d put him in his place twice in less than an hour. Things might have been different now but in your eyes, he saw a woman determined to see past a hardened exterior to find her old friend and former lover. The more his own butterflies flopped around, the more he struggled to keep that wall up.

He hummed, swirling the contents of his glass with the teensiest bit of a smile. “You’re as foolish as ever…”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Putting your trust into a man you haven’t seen in nearly a decade… Just how much trouble have you walked into living so carelessly?”

“I am not careless.”

“That so?”

“I just made a conscious decision to trust you. I’d like to think you want to trust me, too.”

“I don’t trust anyone… Including you.” he said before sipping his drink, “But, you’re here because I realize how stupid I am not to.”

“Nishikiyama-san…”

There was a lengthy silence but this time, it wasn’t uncomfortable. He just smiled that same old charming smile that now felt almost nostalgic and said, “It’s Akira.”

Your lips curled into the smile he’d fallen for time and time again and it only made him grin harder. This moment took you back and you’d be lying if you said that that boyish smile didn’t threaten to take hold of your heart again.

With the ice finally broken, the two of you found yourselves talking and laughing as if time and experiences hadn’t pried you apart. It was almost as if you were temporarily transported back into that old, dinky apartment-- drinking and snickering until the break of dawn. With the slicked-back hair, you could see the corners of his eyes wrinkle with each smile and every bout of laughter.

“Refill?” he asked, taking your empty glass to the bar again.

His brown eyes mainly focused on his pour but every so often he’d sneak a peek at your expression, just as you were doing him. The corners of his mouth were still lifted in a gentle smile even as he nibbled at his bottom lip, like he did when he was lost in deep thought.

Wow, were you quickly enamoured with him!

With him mellowed out like this, smiling so sweetly, it was easy to forget who he’d become until he’d gently placed the glass in your hands. Something about the brief physical contact made your smile fade and he could tell that it was now time to address the elephant in the room.

“Thanks.” you said softly, tracing the rim of the glass with your thumb then muttered, “Why did things have to change?”

“Why did I have to change, you mean?”

You shook your head, “That’s not--”

A brow quirked as he stared at the liquid sloshing around the large sphere of ice, “It’s the truth though, isn’t it? We’ve gotten older but you’re pretty much the way I remember you. Of course, I’ve noticed some changes but the important things, the things that made me fall for you all those years ago… They’re still there. What could be said about me?”

“I’d say that boy is still in there somewhere. We just have to be patient and we’ll find him.”

The way you tilted your head and spoke softly made those butterflies flop like never before. He almost wanted to bend over and rub until they dissipated.

“Please,” he said, rolling his eyes sarcastically.

“It’s true. Who do you think is pushing you to open up to me now?”

He shook his head and smirked, “That’s exactly what I mean…”

“Huh?”

“Believing in a guy like me is dangerous, ______. The way I left you, the way I hurt you, the shit I’ve done-- You can’t honestly tell me that you believe I deserve this sweet attitude you've got going on… Then, to top it all off, you’re still spitting out the corniest lines I’ve ever heard and--”

“C’mon, always with this?”

He wanted so smile but it was immediately replaced with a much more serious expression and when he spoke, his voice sent chills down your spine.

“Watch out or I’ll fall for you again.” he said, licking his lips so sensually that you couldn’t tell if it was intentional or just odd timing.

So you laughed it off.

“You’re still a flirt… and not a very good one.”

He hummed, setting his glass down. “Is that right? Hey… tell me something, _____. Why is it that most of my favorite memories of us are the ones when we’re reminiscing about the way things used to be? Makes me wonder if we were destined to turn out this way… Us, being each other’s past instead of the future.”

“Well, that’s very ‘glass half empty’ of you.”

His cynicism reminded you of the letter he’d sent inviting you here.

Now, you were witnessing first hand that the optimist he used to be was long gone.

Was that what spilled blood did to a person?

“Why did you come, _____?” he asked, all sweetness from before abruptly retreating. “Answers about the last decade, I presume?”

“Of course, I want answers but that’s not--.”

“You wanted them so badly that you’d reach out to Kiryu?”

You flinched when you saw him reach for the end table near you, “Huh? H-How co--”

He opened the drawer and dropped the contents in your lap. “Like I said in my letter, I had gotten my hopes up one too many times when I thought they found you… So, I started demanding my men collect evidence when they found possible leads. That’s how I got that photo of you. They even brought back some of your mail… that letter, for instance.”

Your hands shook violently as you sorted through the pile: folded grocery lists, an unpaid bill that you misplaced, a nameless cd, a catalog and a letter from the prison Kiryu was held in.

You frowned, and lifted the dvd, “What the hell is this?”

“Just like the photo… surveillance.” he said, “You were walking around a grocery store.”

“Oh my g--” you said, tossing it onto the table unable to hide your disgust.

Before you could begin to unpack the fact that strange men had been following you with a camera without your knowledge, you flipped the envelope and saw that it’s been opened. You didn’t recall tossing out your letters to Kiryu which meant they must have taken it shortly after it had been delivered.

“You stole my mail and read it?!” you nearly yelled, glaring at the man who’d been casually lighting a cigarette. “Did you forget what boundaries are?!”

“That coat really does suit you….” he mumbled almost as if he meant to keep the thought to himself as he blew out a cloud of smoke.

Your eyes darted across the evidence and almost as if it called to you, you picked up the catalog and flipped to the page that had been dogeared and marked with red marker. Your stomach lurched when you recognized the emblem from the box. Part of you wanted to rip the coat off and burn it now that you were aware of how you came to acquire it, but the more important issue was that he’d read your letter from Kiryu.

“How could you?!” you shouted, fanning the envelope.

Massaging his temple, he sighed. “Putting eyes on you was already crossing a line. I asked for evidence, but I never authorized rummaging through your things… One of my men took it upon himself when he read the name of the sender. He’s been dealt with. I doubt that it makes things any better but I didn’t read it... Consider the coat an apology.”

You were almost offended by the suggestion that a damned coat could make things better, but everytime you found yourself mad about the damned coat, your mind went back to what may have been written in the letter. You stared at him, but he kept his head tilted at an angle, avoiding your scolding glance like he used to do all those years ago. He simply chewed at the inside of his lip and studied the floor until he could bring an unsteady hand up for a sip or a puff.

Finally shrugging out of the coat, mostly due to the heat of anger- you tossed it across the sofa.

“Do you regret trusting me now?” he asked. There was something bitter in his voice, not towards you but himself.

You didn’t answer and began to read the letter. Your mouth went dry as your eyes darted across the page and for a moment, you felt as if you’d drop to the floor and have a heart attack.

“‘Between the two of us, it’s clear who came to know Nishiki best… As your friend, I advise you to always trust your gut. I’m sorry but that’s the most I can offer you. Stay safe, _____.’ ”

“And what does your gut tell you?” he asked, still staring at the floor.

At one point, you had been a step away from full blown obsessiveness over Kiryu’s murder charge after you heard about it.

Where you lived had their own yakuza factions to worry about but it wasn’t uncommon for rumors to spread about the happenings in other prefectures, especially amongst the terrified civilians. With your news sources and rumor mills intermingling, it was difficult to avoid and since it hit so close to home, you had a compulsive need to figure out the truth.

You’d finally bitten the bullet and reached out to the source for comment and after years of back and forth, this was all you got in return? You couldn’t say you were shocked. You had your suspicions for a long time but somehow Kiryu’s lukewarm letter as well as the language in Nishikyama’s forced you to acknowledge the truth you had been trying hard to avoid.

Admitting it aloud would disassemble the comforting lie you had been telling yourself: Akira was still the same man you fell in love with before.

“Did...Did you kill that man?”

Though you phrased it as a question, it came out more like a shaky accusation.

Sighing another cloud of smoke, he stared at the bar top. He still couldn’t bear to look at you, all he could manage was to stare in your general direction. “You’ve always been such a smart girl... One more thing that hasn’t changed.”

Your throat tightened. You thought you needed a sip of water but it was impossible to swallow even your own saliva and your eyes began to burn with tears that you just refused to spill.

His vague confession filled you with more questions than you could possibly process and all you could manage was, “Y-You must have had your reasons, right?”

He finally looked at you, his eyes wide with surprise. “If I did… Would that justify it for you?”

“Of course not!” You shouted. “Well, I mean--No. I-- maybe… I don’t think so? I just-- I'd like to believe that you haven’t become some sort of unhinged maniac that ends the lives of innocent people indiscriminately.”

Your words chipped away at his heart but he did his best to maintain his stoic expression.

“______, I don’t intend to mince words… If you really came for answers, I’ll give them to you. Every nitty, gritty and sordid detail. If I’m gonna come clean, I’m gonna do it right… I owe you that much. But, I can’t promise that you’ll ever be able to look at me the same. That fact alone makes me want to change my mind but if it’s what you want…” he trailed off.

“I need to know.”

In that moment, he finally tasted regret for what he’d done. If not for the lives he’d taken, then for the change in your eyes when he confessed to you. He wished that he could crawl over and kiss you one last time– lay his head in your lap as he opened up… Just like the good old days.

But he’d burnt that bridge long ago.

He hesitated, stamped out his finished cigarette then rose to his feet. If he was going to do this, he couldn’t sit in front of you and watch your expression contort into various versions of disgust. If this was going to be the last time he saw you, he needed your smiling face to be the clearest memory of all.

He started to pace around the sitting area, lighting another cigarette to ease his nerves through the emotional rollercoaster he was about to put the two of you through.

Nishikiyama began with the night he left, the thoughts going through his mind that pushed him to make that choice: the fear that you would’ve left him anyway now that you had a taste of what a real family was like.

He got to how he started taking up at Serena again, even though he wanted to avoid Kiryu and Yumi, he was too lonely without you to stick to it. He wasn’t sure if it was confusion from having left you despite still being totally in love with you or not, but he began to juggle confusing feelings for Yumi again.

Then, he began to feel as if everyone and everything was leaving him the dust. You were living with your biological family full time by that point and he hadn’t seen you in a couple years. Yumi and Kiryu were getting closer and closer by the day, even though they were never an official couple, he often felt like a third wheel even with Reina around to balance things about.

Eventually, Kiryu did his last collection job, caught the attention of their higher ups and he was in line for his own family. That was when it was painfully obvious that he’d grown envious of Kiryu and you weren’t around to pull him back on track anymore.

He described to you the night Yumi was abducted– the night of his first kill and the deal with Kiryu. He wouldn’t wish in a million years for Yumi to have gone through what she did, but talking to you now suddenly made him wish he’d never gone to the bar that night. Not only did he lose his best friend, he’d lost you and Yumi. The only thing that kept him holding on was his sister Yuko, so he worked his ass off to afford her her medical care.

And then, he was given his own family.

He told you about his first fleet meant to get his newly established family on track, the scam artist of a quack that cost Yuko her life and the night he almost joined her. If murderers could go where she was, that is. He described the epiphany he had as he stabbed Matsushige and he admitted that he would do it again if he had the man in front of him. From then on, he decided that since his hands were tainted with blood, he would do whatever it took to make it to the top of the Tojo Clan– by any means necessary.

You took the letter from Kiryu and used it to fan the back of your neck. You knew that this was what you asked for but just like your decision to come here, you were not prepared on what to do next.

He finally sat down on a barstool, keeping a safe distance from you but he desperately needed you to look at him– to see the color in your eyes, proof that he hadn’t broken your heart even further.

“I-I need fresh air.” you said, panting through heavy, uneven breaths.

“You want to leave?” he asked, taking out his cellphone. “I can have someone take you.”

“No,” you said. “I just… I can’t breathe. I need to--”

He rushed over to you, noticing that you’d begun to appear physically ill and when you stood to your feet, there was a stagger.

“Hey, take it easy.” he whispered, gently grabbing your shoulder. “Wanna go to the balcony?”

“Please, I can’t be touched by you right now.” you said, swatting him off. “Just point to where it is… I’ll find it myself.”

He did as he was told and once he heard you close the sliding door behind you, he sank back down into his original seat.

‘I can’t be touched by you right now.’

‘By you.’

‘Can’t be touched.’

‘By you…’

Fragments of that sentence played in his mind on repeat as he stared down at his hands. Over and over and over again until they no longer even sounded like words. Of all the things that could’ve come out of him coming clean to you, not once did it occur to him that you would be repulsed by the filth that would taint his hands forever.

That thought was enough to finally break the remaining control that he’d been attempting over his emotions. If not for him hearing your own wail from behind the glass door, tears would have surely fallen.

It had been ages since he last cried, especially not over his work. So, what the hell was it about telling you now that made any difference? Genuinely what was it? Shame of disappointing you or true, actual regret?

It was making him sick to his stomach, hearing you sob so hideously and knowing that he couldn’t go out and hold you– caress you, apologize for doing this to you. After all, you ‘couldn’t be touched' by him. He’s never hated himself more than he did at this very moment.

Burying his face into his blood stained hands, he inhaled sharply and choked back a couple of sobs of his own until the door finally slid open again. Then, he reverted back to what he remembered was his previous demeanor as you returned to your place on the sofa, running your hands along your arms.

There was a childish part of him that inappropriately wanted to blurted out an ‘I told you so’ as you rubbed away the chill but he eyed the coat you’d tossed away and swallowed the jest.

The two of you sat in silence, not knowing what you wanted to say to the other, if anything at all. You just wanted to be near each other, despite everything that lay on the table, you seemed to want to be in the other’s presence more than anything and it confused you.

It may have been an hour that you sat like that and when you finally spoke up, his ears perked.

“I… had no idea things had gone that far.” you whispered. “Now that I do, I don’t know how to move past it.”

“I don’t expect you to.”

“The thing is, I want to. We can’t change the past, right? It doesn’t mean that I approve or agree with your actions but the least I can do for my own peace is to accept it for what it is…”

“Do you wish that I refused to tell you or at least spared some of the details.”

“I couldn’t say… Not yet, anyway.” You shrugged, “I just wonder if things could’ve been different, you know?

“I believe, the day I left you I set my fate in motion. I tried to force myself to move on from us before I was ready. Holing up in my apartment didn’t do me any favors. I went into this dark pit of despair that I didn’t see a way out of until I started going to Serena again. And i--”

“You started pining after Yumi again?” you said, not realizing you said your thought aloud until he reacted.

“I-- what? What did you just say?”

You shook your head, “Forget I said that. Sorry.”

“What did you just say?!” he shouted, no longer having it in him to maintain a cool composure.

You didn’t say anything, shocked that he’d felt so brazen as to raise his voice at you. Somehow, you couldn't find it in yourself to be afraid even now.

He shouted your name in demand of a response.

“You ended things with me to pine after Yumi!” you shouted back. “That’s what I said.”

“What the hell was I supposed to do?!” If eyes could start fires, he might have set you aflame with his glare, “You turned your back on me!”

“Excuse you?! You dumped me! I wanted you to come with me!”

He scoffed, “And do what? Live in that dump, farming rice? You should’ve stayed in Kamurocho! You should’ve been patie-- Don’t you see what I’ve got here?! You shouldn’t have preferred strangers who tossed you away to your goddamn boyfriend who you’ve known damn near your entire life! You should've stuck by me!”

“And do what? Twiddle my thumbs until you got out of prison? If it weren’t for Kiryu--”

“Don’t you fucking DARE!” Nishikiyama yelled, kicking the table in front of you as he chucked the bottle of saké he’d brought over earlier at the wall.

With a flinch, you cupped your mouth and shrieked, silently watching the saké drip down the wall and onto the floor.

“YOU don’t get to do that to me!” He angrily stomped to his feet, “not you!”

The tremble in his voice made your heart ache. You raised your hands and spoke as cautiously as you would to a volatile animal. “A-Akira, I’m not sure what you thought I was about to say but--”

“It was enough!” he shouted. “What the hell do you even know, huh?! I PROTECTED YUMI! Kiryu did NOTHING BUT CARRY THE DAMN SENTENCE!”

“Please calm down and listen to--”

You could see the wheels in his head turn but you couldn’t tell where they were leading him, just that they were going. “If you’d just stayed your ass home, none of this would’ve--”

“Are you putting the blame on me?!” You clenched your fists and finally finding the strength in your legs to stand, “YOU pulled the trigg--”

“STOP! Just stop fucking talking.” he hisses.

He’d heard enough. This argument was going nowhere and he’d known just as well as you did that all of that vitriol was misplaced. You were feeling so much, but the things that upset you the most, you weren’t comfortable yelling at each other about.

The two of you stood in a long, tense silence until he could calm himself and talk to you with the respect you deserved because in the end, he did have sense enough to know that none of this was truly your fault.

“I cared for Yumi, more than maybe I should have. But I lov-- I mean, I was so in love with you…” he said; great pain emphasizing his words. “Nothing came of it. I was practically invisible when Kiryu was around. You know that... “

The room fell into another lengthy silence and just as you bent your knees to sit, he dropped a bomb that comically froze you in place. If it hadn’t been so tense, he might’ve made fun of you for it.

“I was gonna marry you…”

“...what?”

He debated on where or not he should elaborate, “When you first left, I promised myself that when you came back I was gonna ask you to marry me… The punk kid I was then… had the ring for months but I could never bring myself to man up and do it. In those first three months though, I knew that I had no choice. I couldn’t stand being apart from you like that… Then, you came back proposing we move to the sticks.”

“Why didn’t you just ask me to stay?”

“And wait until you resent me for holding you back?”

You said nothing.

“I didn’t want you to turn around and hate me too.” he mumbled.

“I could never.”

Even now, knowing what he’s done, you felt a plethora of emotions but hate wasn’t one of them. You watched him come to the table to collect his pack of smokes and lighter.

“Some time ago, I figured out why I caved and told you to just go without me…”

“Why was that?”

He took a long pause and looked at you as if he’d known he would never get to look at you again and you got chills on the back of your neck.

“I didn’t want to take a chance at being rejected.” he said, “If you’d rejected me, of all people, it would’ve been all over for me."

“Akira…”

He smiled bitterly then excused himself to the balcony for his own order of fresh air.

You felt as if you’d been pummeled to a pulp. Bomb after bomb after atomic bomb of information and so much of it was far too heavy to process in one sitting. There was a hurricane of emotions surging inside and you had no idea what to make of anything except the fact that he’d wanted to marry you before.

Nishikiya– Akira wanted to marry you.

Wasn't it silly to wonder if marriage could have saved him? Was it selfish of you to leave him without fighting for it a little harder? Sure, he told you to go but shouldn’t you have known better than anyone that he was in pain? More pain than he was letting on?

More importantly, could you have saved lives from getting absolutely ravaged?

At the same time, why was it always your responsibility to read his mind? At what point does a man put his fragile pride aside and stick his neck out fighting for what he values? Wasn’t he to blame for treading down this path paved with blood and anguish?

Questions swirled in your mind so quickly that it made you feel light headed. There was no way you’d be able to leave this place tonight with a sure answer to even a third of them. However, there was one thing you were certain of and there was a silly, 10 years younger version of you deep down in there who was bubbling with excitement at just the thought of it.

Taking a deep breath, you slid the door to the balcony open and you found him there leaning against the railing as he smoked his cigarette. Though you couldn’t see his face, you were beginning to be able to picture what sorts of expressions this version of him made and you pictured one wrecked with emotion while trying so very hard to remain composed just enough to maintain control. Clenching the door handle, you wished for confidence as you said the words younger-you were pathetically dying to say aloud since it became relevant.

“You know, I probably would’ve said yes.” you said, trying to ignore the tears rolling down your cheeks.

He turned slowly, staring into your blurry eyes in confusion. “Huh?”

“Back then, if you asked me to marry you…” you smiled weakly, “I would’ve said yes.”

It had taken him a moment to realize what you said but once he understood, he flicked his cigarette off the balcony and took slow, deliberate steps toward you until there was barely any space left between the two of you. It was then that you noticed the tears glistening on his cheeks under the skyglow. He lifted a shaky hand to thumb away your tears while you stared into each other's eyes. Beyond the sounds of the city, you could hear one another’s erratic breathing.

You reached up to do the same for him and through your weak smile, you whispered, “If you don’t kiss me now, I’ll--”

As if he’d been held back by a leash, snipped clean by your permission, he captured your lips and claimed them with his own. Akira hesitantly cupped the sides of your faces as your words from earlier tried and failed to stop him from doing what he’d been dying to do since he laid eyes on you. When you gasped, he began to pull away only to have you pull him back in and with that, all of his inhibitions left him– he reacquainted himself with you; tongue, teeth and all.

You gripped his collar in a futile attempt to bring him closer but he was as flush to you as your body was to the glass door. He let out a soft moan of your name and he feared that if you asked him to say anything else, your name was all that he could have offered you.

Rolling his head to kiss you at a different angle, he shifted his footing and hissed at the feeling of his erection pressing into you as he lifted you against the glass. You wrapped his loose tie around your fist in another futile attempt to pull him closer accidentally tightening around his neck again but he didn’t mind it one bit.

He agreed, you weren’t clearly close enough either.

You tore at the buttons of his black shirt while he unzipped your dress, both of you still kissing with minimal breaks for air. He secured you against the window while you fumbled with his belt.

He broke the kiss to let you stand while he slid the shoulders of your dress down to expose your breasts then he dipped under the skirt of your dress to tug off your panties. The moment they were off, he wasted no time reacquainting himself with your cunt as well– so slick and all he’d gotten to do was kiss you.

Fuck, how he missed you.

“_____.”

Akira hooked the undersides of your knees over his shoulders to hoist you up against the glass again, and he growled at the first uninterrupted swipe of you. Your nectar tasted even sweeter than before, he might’ve said you aged like fine wine. It had been a while since he last put effort into pleasuring a woman.

When you’re the boss, the women came easy and a nut came cheap. He could believe it if he told himself that this whole while he’d been preserving his talents for you. After all, one opportunity and he dove right in.

No convincing necessary.

His ears perked at the sound of your sweaty fingers squeaking against the glass while you repeated his name until it was unrecognizable. You came and you weren’t sure if it was because of how long it had been since you last been with someone or if it was just his sheer ability to please you like no other.

When he returned to eye level and looked into your eyes, you saw him again– the man that wanted nothing more than to love you and that man was starved for you. He slipped his pants down and with a nod from you he finally slipped inside of you. He hissed through each deep thrust while he pressed his nectar-coated lips against yours. Each thrust was slow but greedy. He made love to you like he never could with anyone else.

You still hadn’t fully recovered from the first orgasm but it wasn’t long before you were burying your fingers into his pomade slicked hair, trembling for a second.

He grunted, now burying his face into your neck, one hand cupping the back of your head to keep it from banging against the glass as he pounded into you.

“I love you.” he whispered through shaky breaths, surprising even himself but he couldn’t shut up if he wanted to– and he didn’t. “I love you. I love you. Ahh, fuck I fucking LOVE YOU.”

With his eyes clenched shut, images of the past came hurling back at him on each stroke: the first time he realized he loved you, the first time you kissed, the night you first made love, the first stupid fight, every time you made him feel safe in your arms, the day he decided he wanted to be with your forever, the ring, the first time you left him alone, the sex you had the night you returned, your final fight–

As you gripped the collar of his shirt, you were both too impatient to remove, you thought about the hand that held you so gently against the door and the one that so lovingly protected your head from thumping… How could hands this delicate be capable of doing anything but love?

His grip at the back of your neck tightened but even still, the tenderness was there. He pressed his face into your neck hard and you realized then that was attempting to muffle himself.

And he wasn’t just holding you up, he was embracing you.

Much like the wetness dripping from your connection, there was a wetness pooling above your collarbone that was a touch too warm to be drool.

Thump… Thump….. Thump.

Akira managed a few more thrusts against the glass, letting out an intense almost pained groan and then his hips finally slowed to a rolling stop.

You guided him back by his messy hair to take him. Eyes speckled either from tears or from squeezing them shut so tightly and his face glistened either tears or sweat. No matter the case, he was a beautiful mess looking at you with those soft, adoring eyes as if he was begging you to pause time and stay in the moment with him forever.

“Forgive me.” he whispered weakly. “Forgive me, ok?”

You were now on the verge of tears again. You took the end of his tie to clean both your faces and then you kissed him.

“I do.” you whispered back finally but both of you were aware that there was much more at play here that was not your place to forgive. He gave you another deep kiss before lowering you back to your own two feet.

After helping one another get redressed, he took your hand in his and led you back inside where it was warmer now that the afterglow was beginning to set it. You started past the broken glass from his earlier tantrum and you tugged him back.

“Shouldn’t we clean that?”

He shook his head, “Leave it. After tonight, I’m selling the place. They’re gonna rip it to hell anyway. Why bother?” he said, now leading you down a quiet corridor and into a bedroom.

“Lay with me?” He said, “Let's play pretend for a little while.”

You nodded, he lowered the lights then gestured toward the bed. It was so comfortable that you melted into it straight away. When you looked over at him crawling to join you, he wore a small pleased grin.

“Why are you selling it?” you asked, absentmindedly studying the room.

“I’m never here. Today’s the first time this year.”

“Geez, you can afford a place that you only visit once a year. You must really be living the high life.” you joked.

“Do you like it?”

You nodded against his chest, “Looks a lot like an old scrapbook I made. Maybe I should take you to court for stealing my ideas~?”

“I guess the designer did their job then… I’m glad you like it. Did you walk around before I got here?”

“I couldn’t get far.” You shook your head, “Too nervous.”

“Yeah? Damn. Try to take a good look before you leave, alright?” He said, “Aside from me and the designer, you’re the only one who's gone past the front door.”

“I didn’t take you for a loner.” you sneered. “Why is that?”

“I’m not.” He snickered, rubbing your shoulder. “I just knew you wouldn’t want ‘scary thugs’ roaming around your house.”

You slowly lifted yourself so that you could look at his face, “Akira.” You whispered.

He smiled at you then stared up at the ceiling, “Can you tell by how old school it is? They’re going to want to modernize it before they sell it off, I’ll bet. But, I love this place. Being here made me feel like you could hear me, like you were in the walls… It would’ve made a good first place for us.”

You brought your hand to your mouth and the waterworks were threatening an encore.

“After I figured out why I chickened out of marrying you, I promised myself that if I found you again, I’d never let you go. I was supposed to win you back. We were supposed to get married and this was going to be our house until I really came up. It never came to pass… but just like the ring, I never got rid of it.” he explained. “Lame, I know.”

“You’re selling it now, though.”

“So much time has passed since then… Way too much. I finally gave up. I planned on leaving the key and the ring on the table when I signed it over. By the time I realized I could find you, I’d already started the process.”

“What a grandiose gesture and yet, so like you.”

You sank into his embrace again while you casually talked more about your lives but never once acknowledging the dark elephant in the room or a mention of when this night together would end, wishing that time outside the penthouse would freeze and you’d never have to say goodbye to one another again.

When you woke up, you were underneath a comforter; your coat, a small box and a sheet of paper were lying next to you in place of Akira. Your eyes searched the room for any indication that he was still there. You panicked and picked up the notecard.

Thanks for tonight. I’ll never forget what it was like

to hold you in my arms again. I guess some things

never change. When it comes to you, I can’t man

up and face you head on.

When you open the box, you'll know what it means.

Despite what I’ve done, I can't let you go. I want you

by my side until it’s time to face the music. I’ll

spend every last breath making sure you don’t

regret it. But, if you don’t feel the same, no hard

feelings.

If you take the ring, meet me at the Millennium

Tower Rooftop. I’m renting out an office there, I’ll

know when you make it. Wait there for me. If not,

leave the ring behind or sell it. In the end, it

belongs to you.

I hope you at least keep it close to remember me by,

even if only to remind yourself not to make the same

mistake twice. I'll always love you, ______.

-Yours, Akira

You silently cursed him for bringing you to tears yet again as you stared at the letter. Your heart pounded something awful when you reached for the box. A part of you was too terrified to open it but the curious part of you couldn’t have opened it fast enough. You couldn’t help but sob when the beautiful ring inside gleamed at you.

Your head spun and you could’ve sat there for hours staring at the ring and the letter without realizing. You didn’t dare slide the ring on your finger as you’d known there may have been no turning back after that.

Though the majority of your questions had been answered, there was obviously still so much to process.

So much to unpack.

You knew that the past version of you would’ve leapt at a proposal but what about present you? Were you in any place to give yourself over to him again after all these years? A heated balcony romp with an ex was one thing but this would require more out of you that you’re not sure you’re strong enough for.

Genuinely, what would you be to him now that you know everything? What responsibility did you hold here? Did knowing and staying silent make you an accomplice?

You feared the idea of losing him again– the idea of losing him forever, but was the fear of what could come if you allowed him to place that ring on your finger greater?

The impressive rock glistened back at you, tauntingly as if to ask, ‘So, what will you do?’

And you reached for it.

What would you do?

#akira nishikiyama #nishikiyama akira #yakuza smut #yakuza fanfic #yakuza x reader #it's not sunday but heyyyy

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dandelion-system · 8 months ago

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I think, realising just how different yours and your siblings childhoods were hurts more than anything else.

And it’s always the small things. We have a new kitchen tap, and it’s kinda fancy I guess? I found out that you can sorta turn it into a drinking fountain.

So I turn around and go to say to my brother, ‘hey, this is just like those taps we used to drink from at school when we were little!’

But then I realised he never drank from the water fountains. He never went to school. And I have to leave it there, because then I start to realise why.

Why I went to school and struggled, but he got to stay home. Why I had to miss out on things that I was desperate to do, and have carried that into my adult life, just because he didnt want to do them.

It was an unfair childhood. But you know what? I think what hurts the most is that we didn’t share it. I can never turn around to my brother and go ‘remember when’ or ‘this felt so’ or ‘wasn’t it funny’. Because we had the same parents, the same house, the same toys, the same books, the same meals, the same bedtime; we didn’t have the same childhood. I’ve shared so much with him, and yet nothing at all.

Nothing.

#childhood #nostalgia #sad thoughts #growing up #did system #glass child #I guess that’s what I am #and I can see how badly he needed that attention #and he deserved all of that support #but I think maybe #just maybe #I was just a little kid #and I deserved it too

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the-gayest-show · 10 months ago

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just finished all the remainder of the episodes of fop a new wish that i didn't finish (so crocker to the future to lost in fairy world) and i really liked it!

overall, banger after banger this show really is a fun one, nickelodeon better give em a s2 PLEASE THIS IS THE ONLY CURRENTLY RUNNING SHOW I HAVE-

episode reviews below!

Crocker to the Future: genuinely loved all the parascience things. I do 100% feel like that award for preserving in the face of adversity or whatever truly belonged to Crocker. my guy was at this for like. 10+ years! AND THAT"S JUST THE OG FAIRLY ODDPARENTS!!! MY GUY WAS ON HIS "fairies are real!!! trust me!!" thing for ENOUGH TIME FOR FOP A NEW WISH TO TAKE PLACE!!!!!! i'm so glad he (sort of) got to have the award in that ghost containment thing.

AJ in the episode was interesting but honestly major L for AJ. I thought he'd be like the next einstein, not a parascience mf. maybe Timmy Turner fucked him up a bit, who knows...

Battle of the Dimmsonian: Genuinely felt bad for Peri here. Like DUDE. You are stuck with this asshole kid (Dev I love you but be nicer plss) who just sorta demands things from Peri like all the damn time? poor kid. Reminds me of what Remy Buxaplenty had with his godparent but at least wandisimo had a semi-similar personality so it kind of worked. Not saying that Peri and Dev don't work, it might since Dev has been shown to be nice underneath but I can't stand the blatant mistreatment for now.

But also, damnnnn he IMMEDIATELY recognizes his parents and goes "oh shit" it's crazy how he managed to do that when they're fidget toys on a kid's backpack.

I also liked the whole back and forth thing ("Mom? Dad?" "Son?" etc), Cosmo being the only one to not do that is so true for him.

I wonder if Peri not seeing Cosmo and Wanda was intentional, we'll see!

Patty Possum's Party Playground: I almost thought this episode was gonna be like Five Night's At Freddy's or somethign with the animatronics but I guess not! I liked Patty Possum, she's so rad! I can defo see why Winn liked skateboarding after that. I love Cosmo and Wanda being certified idiots in this episode. They took "you can't use magic" seriously (as seriously as "oh Wanda shrunk into the claw machine so we could actually get a prize" can be) and stuck BOTH of their wands in the claw machine. If there's anything I love about this show, it's Cosmo and Wanda being two halves of a whole idiot. Truly can't function without magic fr fr I liked the gag of Hazel's dad literally being punctual as hell. That scene where he's like "oh it only takes 29 min and 30 seconds to get there" and then it hits 7:30 and he's panicking is so real (what if I headcanoned him as autistic. what then? just like me fr fr).

A Date To Remember: A really cute episode where Hazel essentially has to compete against Cupid (who looks like a baby now, I guess they got rid of his looks from the main series and gave them to Peri lol) [look how they untwinkified my boy /j] to make sure Hazel's parents fall back in love again. The ending where the parents think it was just another puppet show was crazy, wasn't expecting that tbh!

Lost In Fairy World: WE GOT THE FAIRY TRIO INTERACTING LET'S GOOOOOOO

It seems like their dynamic is basically just over protective coddling parents vs their son who really doesn't like it. But despite what I used to think before seeing this episode (that maybe Peri had some kind of resentment or something) it doesn't seem that way? Peri seems to like his parents overall and maybe even might enjoy the affection (if it weren't for the godkids there), but I get why he turned off the tracker and such. My guy wants independence! You go boy! Them sneaking in to Jorgan's office was really funny and stuff. I hope we'll see them all together in the next episodes because I like their dynamic and want to see where it goes!

Dev and Hazel were great here too! Dev is still kind of an ass to Peri but not as much which is an improvement! I like how he gets that "dimmadome face" or whatever it was called where he basically looks as deranged as his dad. Like father, like son I guess. Dev and Hazel actually having fun together is a step up from where they used to be, it seems like they solved their argument somehow. Dev sort of took that to mean that they weren't friends anymore, poor thing.

Dev taking advantage of the loopholes is so smart lol, Peri having a crisis and his parents like "AWWW, baby's first loophole wish!" is crazy.

The rule that "you can only go to fairy world if you're being tested by jorgan" doesn't really make sense if you think about original FOP though. Timmy got to go there almost recreationally! Dude probably attended like 90% of all fairy world events and shit and he was the talk for the town for an entire episode! Make it make sense!!!

Overall tho I LOVED these and they were enjoyable af. Would watch again. Judging by what I saw for descriptions of the next episodes, Peri's anti fairy (or Foop, now known as Irep, which if you ask me doesn't have the same ring to it) will be working with Dev? Crazy. Anyways yeah I had a lot of fun and woah this post got kinda long

#posts #fop a new wish #I feel like I do these reviews a lot should I make up a new tag for them #also no I won't review the first half but I might keep this up till the finale or smth

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chaifootsteps · 1 year ago

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Studio Anon here, after a while of lurking/doing my own thing. Luckily my emotions are much more in check and I’ve strayed from Viv stuff for a bit to relax and hang out with my loved ones! Coming back and seeing Viv throwing a hissy fit, Raph wanting to look/act like Angel (my goodness-), and somehow people still defending episode four is… really comedic, actually.

Everything is awful but man, somehow it just keeps getting worse!

Anyway, just writing my own general feelings on this and the ideas I had for a rewrite long before everything went to hell. I never really was interested in HH until maybe Helluva Boss’ trailer dropped. I found it strange that HH wasn’t even out yet but somehow this ‘spinoff show’ was already made and posted in the public. I thought it was really weird tho, considering HH is owned by a company now, technically, while HB is sorta just there? I only watched since it’s animation and I felt like I had to support it.

Buuuut the longer I had to stare at HB’s ugly designs (and seeing the new ones for HH) I simply wasn’t interested anymore.

I guess I dodged a bullet because jesus it just gets worse.

I don’t know how, genuinely, Viv is a shit artist and writer? She went to a prestigious art school for as far as I remember and got her shows made and animated. I’m studying myself, and god knows I’d want my stories out there! It’s clear that Viv has some idea of what she wants to do, but that’s the thing-,

All she had were concepts (also publicly displaying her fetishes in the public, which is also its own can of worms).

I know in my right mind I couldn’t send people out to work on my stories since they’re heavily in development- even then my character designs are complicated as shit so I wouldn’t dream of anyone animating. Viv’s style being the way that it is + her general palettes being Just Red makes it hard to focus on or do anything with.

I also don’t know how Viv is able to just show off her rape fantasies out there and I’d rather not talk about it (sex-repulsed and all), but the general lack of focus and priority in gay ships is really disgusting.

So, as a writer, I made a general outline of what I’d make Hazbin Hotel and/or Helluva Boss be about.

Redemption is an easy theme to work on for both. ‘Sins of the father’ as a trope could work too. I’ll just use HH for now, as this post would be lengthy should I cover both.

General worldbuilding; due to Lucifer’s habit of toying with human life, comparing them to nothing more than insects, God punishes him and Lilith (who could’ve been some kind of angel too? I know she’s from a different religion entirely, so let’s say she was a random angel) by sending them to Hell to deal with the worst sinners. He and the princes of hell (how do they not address this in Hazbin?), scorned and disgusted by Heaven, try to be controlling over their own citizens. Mimicking/acting out their anger towards God by playing God in their own rings. They’re evil and horrible leaders. Lilith makes Hell feel like a home for her and Lucifer at least, bearing a daughter to restore some humanity within the Pride ring.

So Pride, at least, is less threatening now that Lucifer has a daughter.

The other princes could then ‘rightfully’ call out Lucifer’s behavior, maybe serving as some antagonists for Charlie as she tries to convince them to bring their sinners in for redemption.

So TLDR; the princes and Lucifer have internal problems that Charlie would try and resolve somewhat since she believes in redemption.

Going off to the main story, Charlie is told of Heaven being evil and awful for what they’ve done to her parents and believes it until she meets V (or Ex-Overlord Vaggie in this rewrite). V was recently cast out of the other Vs and was maybe slated to die in the extermination until Charlie unknowingly saved her from her fate. Maybe we could even get a hint of V being an angel/exterminator before with one hesitating to kill her off. The two talk and when Charlie mentions Heaven being an ass, V could tell Charlie about Heaven being good, eventually causing Charlie to start thinking about redemption, and start the hotel.

V is given more thought in the story as Charlie’s love interest and the gateway to her learning more about the two sides. Charlie is so used to Hell being the way that it is that she never considered redemption until she hears and talks to V more. The two try and kickstart some sort of redemption but V is hesitant in getting redeemed and asks that, since Charlie is the princess of hell, they could ask Lucifer for a sinner or two to redeem.

Very loose from here, but after some talk, Lucifer gives them a rundown hotel to make their own, the Vs find out and gets Lust Sinner Angel down to take them out, but is charmed by the idea of redemption. Nifty, Alastor, Husk, and Sir Pentious are all from different rings and it takes Charlie a lot to convince the princes and to try and reconnect them to Lucifer, who seems to be caught off guard with how much Charlie is willing to give this a shot. Lilith on the other hand gets suspicious of V, which could lead to Lilith exposing V of being an exterminator and, “Messing with our daughter’s head so she’ll get killed in the next extermination!”

So drama with the parents, the princes, and struggles with redemption.

It all crashes down on Charlie and the Hazbin crew as they’ve began to grow closer on one another, V especially. The other princes could then be more empathetic (they aren’t as prideful as Lucifer, and Lucifer might love his wife more than his kid tbh) and try to reconnect with Lucifer in the same way Charlie connects to the other ring sinners.

Slowly but surely, the crew better themselves, and before the next extermination, the Angel Gabriel (ain’t he the whole Angel with the flaming sword?) flies down to see Charlie doing her best. Drama here, tension there, V is the first to get ‘redeemed’. Uh oh, angst!

V, after all this time, doesn’t want to be redeemed if that means she can’t stay with Charlie, which is why she was hesitant. Lucifer and the sins come in, try to kill Gabriel or something and there’s signs of a war, but Charlie stands her ground and tries to find some way to get both sides to work together on something, at least.

So. Purgatory.

I haven’t been mentioning Lilith much but she very much loves her daughter, and having enough pride in her (Charlie) ideals to make things better, to give people a chance at redemption, reminds her of her angel days. That peaceful life.

So she agrees.

The Hazbin crew get to work with her in purgatory, V gets to be all happy and cute with Charlie, and everyone learns to try and be better.

There. That shouldn’t be too hard. Maybe a little complicated but those are my surface thoughts. What do you and the others think?

#Anonymous #Studio Anon #image reply #viv stuff #actual blog post

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swaglet · 4 months ago

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I'm sorry for your loss 🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂 Could you tell us some of the things you loved about your baby?

i can talk about sooo many things i loved about my baby....... yapping about him under the cut

he was super picky just like i am and when he first came home he got too nervous to eat on his own for a few days so i figured maybe it would help him if i sat and ate with him, so then it just became habit that we sat and ate together for breakfast and dinner everyday and on weekends i was home for lunch i would sit and eat lunch with him too. it's what helped me start recovering from my eating disorder because i looked forward to eating with my little baby boy everyday to make him big and strong. here's a bunch of baby pics of him i took during his first week home

during the last few weeks he was with me i made sure we ate breakfast lunch and dinner together every single day, a lot of the time i was feeding him & giving him water with a syringe on the bad days, but when he felt well enough to eat he would get so excited to eat with me and i'd give him little plates that matched mine but he preferred to eat out of my hands and drink from a cup i held out to him

he really liked to share my cups with me in general, he used to stick his whole head in my drinks trying to see what was in my cup so eventually i just started holding them out for him to drink whenever he got curious (as long as it was something safe for ferrets). he would drink water and herbal tea with me, but he was not very interested in milk or sparkling water or anything carbonated

one of his favorite things to do was go "fwimming" and "norkeling", he wasn't a big fan of playing in water but he absolutely loved to stick his head under the water in his water bowl and blow bubbles with his nose and every time he did it i would go "he fwimming! he norkeling!" all excited and he would keep doing it and then come rub his soaking wet stinky little face all over me

i could always tell when he was getting sleepy because he would get "sleepy eyes", his little bottom eyelids would turn slightly red and puffy before he would even start yawning and i knew he was ready to take a nap because of his sleepy eyes. i would get under a big fuzzy blanket no matter where i was at and he would crawl under it with me and curl up into a ball and fall asleep as close to me as he possibly could and sometimes i would sing to him while he fell asleep or while he was sleeping. i even put one of his hammocks on the underside of both of my bunks so he could sleep in a hammock near me without having to sleep in his cage. he loved his hammocks. he spent a lot of nights sleeping by me instead of in his cage. jellybean preferred to cuddle with him to go to sleep, so she would always come find him before they went to bed for the night and he'd let her sleep with him wherever he was sleeping

the very first night i let him sleep out of his cage with me years and years ago, after i spend weeks ferret proofing my whole room, he woke up earlier than me and found out a new way to get on my desk (i never found out how he did it) and opened my jumbo bag of sunflower seeds and i woke up to the sound of them being thrown against the wall and the feeling of them raining down on my face. he was shaking the bag like a dog shakes a toy and they were going EVERYWHERE

he was very interested in cheesy snacks like cheezits and goldfish crackers, and i usually wouldn't ever give him the whole thing so it didn't upset his belly, but i would always let him lick the cheese dust off of things if he got curious while i was eating them

his favorite toy in the whole world was this sorta realistic mouse toy that squeaked when it moved, and i would tell him "kill it!" every time he picked it up, and he would scrunch his whole face up to fit the whole toy in his mouth and shake it around and slam it against the floor and death roll it. it got to the point that he killed it so hard the noise maker came out of it, so i put some crinkly paper in there and sewed it back up, but he didn't like it nearly as much anymore so i bought a bulk pack of them (it came with 25) so he could have them forever. now i just have 25 of those mouse toys and the one i sewed back together is on the shrine i made for him that has his ashes and fur and pictures of him, and the rest of them are on my desk. jellybean can't hear them so she doesn't care for them and tonka doesn't know what to do with them so sometimes i shake them just to hear the noise again

his other favorite toy was tampons in the wrapper, he especially loved the ones with cardboard applicators in the paper wrappers. for years i had a box of tampons that was just for him and i would replace his old one every time he shredded the cardboard to pieces. i think he liked trying to get them out of the wrapper

he was my ESA so at first i felt weird not teaching him any emotional support tricks, so i taught him to give kisses on the nose when people would cry, so every time someone cried (including me) he would come lay on their face and lick their nose till they stopped crying. he did that forever

he also was such a good boy, he knew his name and knew "come here" and a bunch of other commands, if i told him to go potty he would go sit in the litter box and try to go even if he didn't have to

while i was potty training him, he tricked me and trained ME to give him treats; for a few days i had no idea he wasn't actually going to the bathroom, he would get in there and fake push to make it look like he was peeing or pooping, and then i would give him a treat because i THOUGHT he went to the bathroom. nope he tricked me to get treats. so every time he got out of the litter box i had to check to make sure he went before i gave him his treat LOL. he was too smart i luv him sm

i think one of my most favorite things about him is that if he felt like his momma wasn't giving him enough attention, he would grab me by the hand or by the sock and start pulling me toward his stash (where ferrets put all their toys, it's a behavior they do) and try to put me in there with all his favorite things. bored with mom? just put her away. real talk though i think he would try to stash me because he loved me so much and every time he did it i would almost cry (or even just burst into tears) becos he loved me so much he wanted to put me with all his stuff. i was his stuff. i was valuable enough to him and loved so much by him that he wanted to put me with all his stuff

side note jellybean does that to my boyfriend everyday (stashes him with her stuff) it's so endearing

#>#askbox

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l-in-the-light · 7 months ago

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Chapter 1129 commentary

Oh boy, I can't believe we're already leaving the Lego Land. Let's start from the end this time, shall we?

He looks so happy! Is he seeing a fairytale-like world? Many people speculate Elbaf will feel like a fairytale world because it spells backwards Fable :D I don't personally picture that myself, but I definitely wouldn't be opposed to it!

Japanese native speakers noticed the "ah" reaction from Luffy there, which usually means Luffy saw something or someone he recognized. I don't think Luffy ever saw Elbaf before. But he might have seen Kid Pirates (if they're trapped in this prison as well, after their defeat) or Hajrudin (why Hajrudin? Because of our sun god person, ofc :D). Or Law. Because why the fuck not and it's his birth month ffs, it's the time for him to reappear finally!!

In comparison this is how Luffy usually looks like when he visits new places (those are from Water 7 and Skypiea mostly). It's more a :O than :D

Meanwhile slight blush and big smile is how Luffy often reacts, feeling all happy, when seeing someone he knows and likes! That expression looks the closest to the one from the end of the chapter 1129, which might mean something or it might mean nothing, but I thought I would share my thoughts anyway.

The more they say it's gonna be Elbaf, the less I believe them. But the hype for Elbaf is unreal, if it ends up not being Elbaf I'm not sure how fandom will take it at this point lol. I will be still fine. I don't want another long arc without Law.

Seems someone is slipping off his character. Now we can fully see how all of this is just a roleplaying bit.

Which puts the comments of all those tiny giants into completely new perspective. They're all in on this, the sun god is the game master, and they're the challengers (well, sorta).

Despite playing along they clearly want to get out of there, so perhaps they're not willing participants in this D&D roleplaying ;) they probably had no choice.

He's reeeeally into that. He would make a great (if slightly too immersed) game master.

Someone has a slight god syndrome here... which makes me wonder... we know in One Piece world there were beings even more gigantic than the Giants - the Ancient Giants like Oars. To them, the world must have felt the same way it does to our sun god here: like a doll house. I always wondered how they might have felt about other races in the world. Normal humans probably looked like polly pocket sized toys. Were the Ancient Giants once the enemies of humankind? If that's the case, how did humankind win against them and set itself free, I wonder?

Careful there, we're almost breaking the 4th wall again, haha.

Someone got so immersed his first thought was "wait, I didn't make this" haha. I wonder if it means he could have made a thunder clouds himself as well, even if just some fake ones :D

Now it's time to reveal who our sun god is. Apparently it's Rodo, a giant who is part of Hajrudin's pirate crew of giants, which joined the grand fleet of our Strawhats. Rodo seems to have been against the idea and doesn't like to serve "tiny humans". But this is curious, because Hajrudin and his crew used to work under Buggy for his delivery business. Perhaps Rodo isn't the smartest and fell for Buggy's visual trick to appear bigger than he actually is ;)

And this is our culprit. Tekking already figured it out before this chapter even came out and I'm amused to no end that the high heels turned out to be the key evidence :D

Another mystery sort of solved. They got carried by a crow pet of Rodo here (wherever "here" is) and apparently they went through sleeping mist belt, whatever that is (there are other belts besides the calm belts?!). I know it sounds like an ass-pull and it sort of is, but I guess it wouldn't be called a "belt" for no reason, right? So this is a new puzzle piece for the worldbuilding, even if it sounds like a poor excuse instead lol.

Rodo's reaction to "but the giant warrior pirates were guiding them" sounds a bit like "so they shouldn't arrive here". It really doesn't sound like they're on Elbaf, but they're probably at least somewhat close to it? Rodo did know what Dorry and Broggy were up to, at the very least.

Despite not agreeing with Hajrudin's decision, he knows all of Strawhats names and calls them with a cutesy honorific, which kinda proves he is a fan of them and heard quite a lot about them as well, lol. Rodo is kinda a funny guy, ngl. Btw the "taso" honorific is apparently one of otaku lingo trends in Japan nowadays. Old guys call young characters by "tan" instead of "chan" (those of you who read Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles are probably well acquainted with the "tan", thanks to "Kuro-tan". I had no idea though that Fye used old guy's way of addressing him lol).

It's based on a silly thing really, "n" and "so" look almost the same in hiragana and sometimes Japanese mispronounce things on purpose because they think it's funny. That's how "tan" became "taso". There's nothing more to it, just a nerdy linguistic joke. That reminds me that no matter how internationally popular One Piece has became, it always stays Japanese at heart and is mainly targeted at Japanese audience.

There's also the fact that Rodo apparently also speaks like a samurai, but kinda clumsily, like he forgets about doing it sometimes. He seems to like samurai culture, he also carries a katana sword. So Rodo is not only a D&D nerd, he's apparently also an otaku. And this gets dangerously close to representing Japanese fandom of One Piece. Rodo might as well be a representation of an otaku kidnapping Strawhats and playing with them like figurines heh. A fake sun god, definitely :D

I gotta say I'm amused that his sorcerer's staff is just a wired net, meant to help him catch those that run away lol. We also learn that this place is a detention center for the giants! So the people in the Lego diorama are indeed giants despite being small. My bet is still on them having been shrinked somehow to fit in there!

"That way is another dead end", says Rodo curiously enough, so maybe Strawhats didn't manage to break out to freedom by destroying that wall, after all?

We saw that the corridor before had many other doors arranged alongside it. If it's a detention center, then it's possible there are other "prisons" behind each door, maybe each with different theme? One is a Lego fantasy castle, maybe there are some sci-fi realms as well, for example?

And this is how the whole room looks like. Makes me again think back to the Ancient Giants and the huge gates leading to Enies Lobby, Impel Down and Marineford. Could that place have been the ancient detention center, if we go by this analogy? Or perhaps an ancient temple, if we go by how Rodo called this room?

It somehow reminds me of the picture from Enel's side story. Especially that snake that looks like it's folded up like a paper fan. In Enel's story that picture below the three moon people looks like a bunch of folded up snakes as well. Btw do you know that it's speculated to be the appearance of Pluton? :D a bunch of huge snakes that will fill up a battle ship of some kind.

The creatures on the right on the wall represents Poseidon (Neptunians), and the sun like object on the top of the wall is Uranus, with 16 swirly beams coming out of it (we see only half of them, more or less), and is powered up by Mother Flame or something akin to that (the flame-like thing in the centre).

We finally know how the Ear God rabbit looked like! RIP XD

Luffy seems to like this little diorama. Apparently Japanese readers think that Luffy is a bit of a nerd himself, he likes robots, he went really bonkers over Sanji's germa suit (on their way to Wano), in One Piece Red we see him build a tower mound with stones so he likes to "build stuff". He also doesn't like to destroy other people's things, especially those that look cool. In Egghead he informed Shaka that he wasn't the one who broke the headphones, kinda expecting to be accused to be the reason why they're malfunctioning. Luffy might seem like he doesn't care if he destroys things, but if he thinks something is cool, he would want it to stay intact :) I'm sure Rodo will appreciate the fact that Luffy finds his Lego city so cool :D

Someone wanted the adventure to last a bit longer. Can't blame you Luffy, I also wouldn't want to leave the Lego city!

One mystery solved! Apparently Luffy can now control Gear 4 to such an extent that it doesn't exhaust him and that it only extends to his hand or leg, instead of covering his full body like before. He learned from his mistakes, so now it doesn't eat up his whole haki! Law would be proud of him :)

Back to Uncanny Valley. Nami tossing away a map? I know it's not much of a treasure, but I don't remember Nami ever throwing anything she found like that before. It's kinda confusing to me.

Something I might have missed from previous chapter. Someone pointed out that Zoro's sense of direction is so bad that even if he followed a noise he would still not arrive at correct destination. They might have a point, lol. We should never underestimate how bad Zoro's sense of direction is.

Seeing how we're already three chapters in and there's no progress on the mystery behind some oddities in Strawhats behaviours, I have to revise my theory a little. I think trolls impersonating them seems to be less likely now, but the inconsistencies remain a fact. Which is interesting, what might have caused them?

Zoro's case is particularly curious, because his lack of sense of direction is a real life disorder. It's called developmental topographical disorientation and it can affect people even in environment they're familiar with, like around their home or neighborhood. They can get lost despite walking the same path every day! Some studies even point out it can be genetically passed down in families, which might explain why Zoro has it; it got passed down in his family ever since Ryuuma, who was infamous for getting lost easily too.

If Zoro suddenly gained some resemblance of a sense of direction then whatever caused the inconsistencies in Strawhats behaviour must work on genetical level. Maybe it's also a consequence of drinking the Green Fairy. It has "green" in it's name, and so far all sus green substances we saw in One Piece have one thing in common: lineage factors! Think of SAD liquid that was green, the liquid in which the clones in Germa's lab were kept in, and the green blood of Seraphims which Vegapunk explained to us contained DNA of current devil fruit users. It's not impossible that Green Fairy somehow also has "lineage factors" that temporarily affect behaviour of anyone who drinks it. It might not have to be only about hallucinations. I have no idea why that would be included in the alcohol, but I already speculated it might be some equivalement of "gift from gods". It could also explain why Giants shared it with the Strawhats, I doubt they drink hallucinatory drinks on a daily basis, without any special occasion. But since they saw Luffy in the form of Sun God Nika, that could potentially call for a celebraton in their eyes.

Rodo calls himself Taiyoushin which means sun god (as opposed to taiyou no kami, Nika's title). Amaterasu is also called taiyoushin in Japanese. One of her attributes was yata no kagami mirror (later became one of three sacred regalia of shinto), and Rodo's shield in the picture above kinda resembles it visually. Interesting!

We also have to finally adress the animal skull Rodo is wearing. We saw it actually quite a number of times before! In Drum Island's castle and in Long Arms Tribe's place on the walls, on top of the houses and ships of Elbaf, and on the head of one of the God Knights. We still don't have any sort of answer for it, but it's worth noting that this theme is ongoing for quite some time now. I guess it's not the time yet to give us any answers. For now all I can tell is this: in One Piece's universe there was once a sun god that looked like a demon wearing an animal skull. Was it a true sun god or yet another fake, who knows?

Last but not least, seems some people are disappointed with the identity of the sun god (Rodo from Giants Pirates). I can't say I can relate to that. Yes, I also wanted it to be something bigger than this, a proper threat, a true horror Strawhats would have to face. But also like, it was only three chapters long, I would lie if I said it was super hyped in that direction. On the contrary, the chapters constantly played with our expectiations and used twists at every corner, so the answer to the mystery being something not really that sinister is quite fitting in that context. I also think the ride was entertaining, I don't remember when was the last time I had so much fun just trying to figure out things and paying extra attention to smallest details! Also, Rodo is kinda easy to like, even though feeding humans to beasts is definitely still, well, quite sinister.

But who knows, maybe the Uncanny Valley adventure isn't over yet, there might be still few more chapters of that :D though Redon's hints for this week's chapter suggest otherwise. But I'm aware they're also often just pure crap.

But he did hint about bounties going up. Newspapers hitting the press finally? Strawhats posters hanging around somewhere?? Ugh I'm having way too many thoughts about this! I hate those teasers, why do I even check them up?!

If you're curious where I got some of the ideas and inspirations for things I wrote in this post, I leave you with a link to a youtube video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77Lpu0q1W4g It's a good channel btw, it's always helpful to get a Japanese native speaker's perspective on things :)

#one piece #one piece 1129 #one piece spoilers #luffy #sun god #giants #tumblr is still acting up for me so I had to upload images to outside page sorry!#one piece chapter commentary

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whatstruthgottodowithit · 1 year ago

Text

Top of the List [Part One]

Fandom: Elvis Presley, American Musician

Pairing: Elvis Presley x Addison Goodwin

Characters: Elvis Presley, Addison Goodwin, Jessie Goodwin, Lisa Marie Presley, Original Female Character, Original Male Character, Jerry Schilling, Marci Cunningham, Colonel Parker [Mentioned], Joe Goodwin

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 2197 of 9639

Summary: When you’re a kid writing a Christmas list is simple; toys and lots of them. As you get older however the wishes start to change and with a life as complicated as the Goodwin-Presleys those wants aren’t always easy to come by. For Addison it’s a family. For Jess answers. And for Elvis, well, as long as he’s got his girls he doesn’t have to wish for a damn thing.

Tags/Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Kissing, Sex, Penatrative Sex, Vaginal Sex, Unprotected Sex, Handjobs, Morning Sex, Mentions of Death, Grief, Grieving, Absent Father, Single Parent, Working Parent, Christmas Day, Secrets, Festive Period, Teen Angst, Moods, Fingering, Christmas Morning, Kids on Christmas, Magic of Christmas

Notes: Okay so I’d been planning these as two separate fics but I decided to put them together because they parallel each other so well. All of them wanting something etc etc

I did want to make it sorta ghosts of Christmas past, present and future but working out the timelines of how to establish everything was too hard.

PART ONE // PART TWO // PART THREE

ELVIS & ADDISON MASTERPOST // TAG LIST

Addison could hear it, the snow outside flurrying past the windows as it made its way to the ground destined to leave the entire lawn blanketed in white. She couldn’t see it of course, her boyfriend’s need for perpetual darkness whenever he slept meant that the room was so dimly lit she could barely see her hand in front of her face, but she didn’t need to see it to know it was there. And just thinking of it made her feel cold. Even now, protected from Elvis’ Baltic bedroom conditions by the thick comforter and the furnace of the man himself beside her, she felt a tiny shiver run down her spine though she didn’t know why.

It wasn’t like last Christmas, when she had been cocooning herself in her blanket in order to keep in some kind of warmth as the wind whistled through the poorly insulated windows. She wasn’t listening to her father’s hacking coughs as he tried desperately to sleep off the chest infection that had been knocking him for six while he’d tried to keep working as long as he could so that she wouldn’t have to pick up more shifts at the movie theatre just to buy some food for Christmas dinner. When she went downstairs later, she’d no doubt be greeted by a wealth of presents underneath the tree instead of the one gift she had limited her father to buying her last year, knowing they could barely afford that.

Though as she lay there thinking about it, thinking of how far she had come from then to now, she realised why she could still feel that cold seeping into her bones despite everything she had done to stop it. It was because even now, laying in a bed in a literal mansion with Elvis next to her, pinning her to him as he snored lightly in her ear, she still felt as alone as she had in that bed last Christmas. She still felt hopeless, as though she were back in the same position because, like she had with her father, she knew something was coming — something bad.

She'd started to feel that around Christmas too, when his trips to the doctor had gotten more frequent but he hadn’t gotten any better. He’d kept her placated, telling her they’d gotten a new treatment, a costly one from what she’d seen on his medical bills, but a good one that was sure to work.

Elvis had done the same. Since Russwood Park he’d told her everything was okay, but there was something in the way he breezed around the details that told her it wasn’t. As her father’s conversations with nurses and doctors had ended abruptly whenever she came into a room, Elvis’ did too, the topic shifting to something trivial as he pulled her into him, holding her in ways she was sure were designed to make sure she couldn’t see his face. The way she had fussed over her father, watching everything he did in case he might need her, was the way Gladys now watched her son, who pretended not to notice her increased attention. And then there were his eyes. His eyes, that despite the smile on his face never seemed to light up the way they used to. Eyes that lost their sparkle every time he looked at her, guilt replacing that twinkle she loved so much.

That was why she was glad he was sleeping. That the weight on his shoulders was removed for now as he lay there oblivious, unlike her. It was dark, but she could just make out the contours of his face. The sharpness of his nose, followed by the plumpness of his lips that descended into the soft roundness of his jaw, down to his bobbing Adam’s apple. As she marvelled at each bit of him she found her finger following the path her eyes had travelled, and though she hadn’t meant to disturb him, she must’ve gone too far as he stirred, his eyes fluttering open blearily as he came to with a yawn, smiling at her sleepily as he got his bearings.

‘Good morning,’ she said, pulling her hand away quickly and placing it on his chest, hoping he wouldn’t think she’d been laying there watching him sleep. Luckily he didn’t seem to be bothered by the intrusion, instead preferring to reach for the lamp beside them so that he could see her face and marvel at her in the way she had him, only not in secrecy.

‘Mornin’ baby,’ he said, as his other hand moved up around her to her shoulder, pushing under the material of her night gown until he was touching her bare skin, warming her from the outside in.

‘Merry Christmas,’ she said with a weak smile. He faltered for a minute, as if the whole thing had snuck up on him, before he wiped his eyes wearily and said, ‘shit yeah. I forgot there for a minute.’

‘Merry Chrissmus baby,’ he said, offering her the most genuine smile she’d see in days, though it was immediately torn away as she watched whatever thought he’d have come and go, taking whatever easy-natured conversation they’d been having with them. She could feel him tense, pulling away from her as he said, ‘We, uh, we should head downstairs.’

‘It’s still early,’ Addison said, as he shifted away, pulling his touch away from her, leaving her colder than she had been before thinking about the snow.

‘I know,’ he said, as he threw back the covers, keeping his gaze away from her as he thought of an excuse to extract himself, ‘but everyone will be up soon.’

‘And they’ll wait for you,’ Addison countered, pushing herself up and pulling the covers back over him, her hand on his chest to keep him in place.

‘Still, can’t waste the day, right? Not on Christmas,’ he said jovially, glancing at her entrapment before he continued, ‘aren’t you wondering what Santa brought ya?’

‘I only asked for one thing,’ she said earnestly.

‘Oh yeah, what’s that?’ he asked, genuine intrigue plaguing his handsome face. She debated it for a moment, telling him that all she wanted was for him to tell her what was going on so that she could start getting over whatever devastation lay ahead, but as she watched him, his blue eyes holding the only genuine sparkle she’d seen since his last concert she couldn’t bring herself to. She couldn’t bring herself to ruin a moment, not when she had just been struck by the realisation that had been what he had been doing all along. He was trying to protect her the way her father had, and though she knew it would happen eventually, she decided to let him. To push the inevitable away for just today.

‘You,’ she said, moving until she was draped across him, their breath intermingling as their noses touched.

‘Ads,’ he whispered, but she didn’t listen, and instead she leant in, their lips touching gently as she kissed him, hoping he’d take the bait. He was tense as she kissed him deeper, shifting until she was sitting atop of him, but as her fingers trailed down his torso, working his pyjama shirt open as they continued the route they’d been headed before he’d awoken, she felt him respond, his dick twitching against her leg without his permission. He wanted to stop her, well, not entirely, but as she pulled back a smile on her pretty face, he knew he probably should. It was what he’d been doing the past few days since every touch and every kiss now filled him with guilt, given that she didn’t know that they were soon to be rationed. Every minute of every day since he’d found out about the draft he’d wanted to spend holed away in this room doing exactly what she was now, and yet he hadn’t. In fact, he’d pushed her away more than he’d intended to. Which was why her touch felt so good now and why his toes curled as she pulled him out of his shorts, her hand gliding effortlessly up and down his length, causing his breath to get heavier and her smirk to grow.

‘You like that?’ she asked with a giggle as her thumb ran over a sensitive spot, causing Elvis’ hips to jolt without warning.

‘You know I do,’ Elvis said, pushing himself up until he was sitting, his arms wrapping around her as their foreheads pressed together. It was enough to stall her movements, his cock nestling between the warmth of his own belly and the heaps of chiffon from the night dress he still hadn’t managed to get off of her yet. It was also nearly enough to make her come clean, to have the words on the tip of her tongue, but she found the only thing she could say was, ‘I’ve missed you.’

‘M’right here,’ he said, though he knew what she meant.

‘Promise?’ she asked. He didn’t say anything; she just watched as that familiar guilt swirled in his eyes before he moved in and kissed her. After that it wasn’t certain who needed the other more. Who needed distraction, warmth, love. She let him lead though, his hand guiding the tip of his cock through her slickened folds before he inched inside her, holding her firm in his lap for a moment as they became one. Even when they could hear sounds of the house coming to life and people waking ready for Christmas, neither of them rushed. Instead, he laid her down on his bed, moving his hips at an agonisingly slow pace, just watching her as she took him.

He was going to miss this. When he ripped the band aid off and changed their lives forever, it would be this he missed the most. Because after today they’d never be like this again. Sure, they could do this a thousand times over, yet it wouldn’t be the same. When her hand ghosted his cheek it wouldn’t be just a loving gesture; it’d be trying to commit the feel of it to memory. When he buried his face in her neck next time, he’d be trying to remember to make a note of the perfume she wore so that he could buy a spare bottle to take with him, just to have some reminder of her in those lonely barrack bunks. In fact, he doubted he’d ever get her like this again, breathlessly calling his name as she clenched like a vice around him, her chest heaving as he spilled into her, unable to hold back. No, he’d never get her like this again because when they did this again she’d be looking at him with the same look she had now, as their heads pressed together, that knowing look of sadness. Every minute from now would be chalked with worry. He knew her well enough to realise that once he told her the truth, she’d pull away, and that was worse than the idea of going away at all.

‘I love you,’ she murmured as he lay against her, his body entirely too big for her to hold properly though she didn’t care. Having him close was enough.

‘Love you too, baby,’ he whispered, not looking up from where his head rested on her chest, her fingers weaving through his hair. She watched him, wondering whether to ask him what was going on or not, but as she lay there, her head clouded with love and lust, she still couldn’t bring herself to. She could see that guilt over coming to him once more, beckoning him to pull away from her, and that she couldn’t bear. So even though she knew something was coming—something bad—she decided to let him play it his way. If he wanted to keep her in the dark for now, he could. If he wanted to give her a Christmas, she’d let him.

‘We should get up,’ she said thickly, trying to force the tears in her voice away before he looked up at her, his head snapping up as she spoke, watching her with those guilt-ridden blue eyes. ‘Your mama will have our heads if we don’t.’

‘You’re right,’ he said with a weak smile, ‘I’m gon’ hope in the shower.’

‘Okay,’ she said as he pulled himself away, allowing her to push herself up until she was sitting, wrapping the comforter around her in the hopes it would mirror the warmth he provided. He jumped out of bed, shivering in the crispness of the air but he didn’t run away. Instead he lingered by the edge of the bed, looking down on her for a moment. Whatever he was going to say gone as he made the executive decision to lean down and kiss her.

‘You’re what I wanted for Christmas too,’ he said, offering her a cheeky smile which she returned before heading towards the bathroom. Though as the door closed behind him, she sighed. It was coming soon; she knew that, but she could give him the day. They could have Christmas.

ELVIS TAGS

@girlblogger2002 @sania562 @caitlin1996 @literally-just-elvis-fics @notstefaniepresley @artlesson8892 @18lkpeters @velvetelvis @jaqueline19997 @elvispresleyxoxo @amydarcimarie @presleyenterprise @everythingelvispresley @elvispresleywife @lillypink @richardslady121

#my writing #elvis presley #elvis and addison #elvis #elvis x ofc #elvis presley x ofc #addison goodwin #top of the list #jessie goodwin #lisa marie presley

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