#I get bullying is hard to take and I don’t envy her position at all

[baddiedaddy7]

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲𝘀🥀🖤

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲😎

strong presence. can be charismatic. minds their own business lmao. their mysteriousness makes them sexy. might be pale. observant. can come off as cold or moody. might get tattoos and piercings. might like to “redesign” themselves every now and then. has good intuition. can be too secretive. doesn’t trust easily. can come off sinister. likes it rough. since first rules the head they might be into hair pulling.

celebrities:Beyoncé,Keanu Reeves,Britney Spears,Ryan Reynolds

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🤑

probably great with money. ambitious. practical. can be stingy. hard headed. might be motivated by 💵 lol. good at making plans. try not to indulge excessively. likes sensual and strong scents. dark colored perfumes. sensual ppl in general. might have a thing for ppl with a “dark” style. likes someone they can’t easily read. desires oral sex, and hickeys.

celebrities:Cher,Heidi Klum,Harry Styles,Robert De Niro

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗱 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🗣

charming in speech. might be a fan of murder mystery’s. likes to talk abt sex related things a lot. can be manipulative w/words. might have a deep or “sexy” voice. might’ve fought a lot/been bullied a lot in school. witty. over protective when it comes to siblings. the sibling that has mood swings lol. might even have jealousy issues with their siblings. siblings probably have scorpio in personal placements or a prominent pluto in their chart. doesn’t trust ppl easily. might have a knack for psychology. dirty talk, and sweet nothings gets these individuals aroused. anything that deals with hands are also a turn on. might not like sessions to be long, and into nudes lol.

celebrities:Céline Dion,Bella Hadid,Drake,Michael Jordan

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲❤️‍🩹

honest. strong-willed. mature, esp emotionally. loyal, and most likely reliable. can be jealous of family members, or just clash with them. mother might keep big secrets away or be abusive. mother might’ve been overly attached or obsessed with you. these ppl might’ve been an unexpected pregnancy. probably quiet and mysterious as a child, kept to themselves. the kid that probably just sat by themselves during recess/could’ve been a loner. moms death can take a great toll on you. parents might’ve been controlling but wanted the best for you. trauma stems from childhood. could’ve went through sexual abuse. mother that’s probably passionate, and can be caring. she might also have a lot of pluto/scorpio energy in her chart. these ppl might be hard to get to know. pragmatic. shouldn’t do one night stands, they might get too attached, so they’re most likely to sleep w/someone they have an intense connection with. touch boobies lmao. might like positions where you stare into eachothers eyes, and have access to hugging lol.

celebrities:Sandra Bullock,Selena Gomez,Kanye West,Ben Affleck

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝗶𝗳𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲☀️

can be romantic, yet intense. probably spiritual. might like rock n roll music, or music that talks abt dark subjects like death, drugs, etc. enjoys horror movies, conspiracy theories, and true crime stuff. probably into witchcraft tbh, also probably really likes astrology. your flings might end up becoming very serious or intense. children, esp the first child might be a scorpio or have a lot of scorpio/pluto influence. try to avoid being judgmental. might also be childish. children may be intimidated by you at first, but get too attached later on. sex will be full of passion. positions like the anvil, or doggy, any deep penetration positions might work best for you.

celebrities:Mariah Carey,Lady Gaga,Gordon Ramsey,Will Smith

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗶𝘅𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🫐

can be open minded. might be obsessed with health, and get freaked out over the littlest things. cats would make a great pet for these placements. they also might own unusual pets like spiders, reptiles, etc. workaholic. might have health issues with genitals, so be careful. might have surgery done on genitals at some point. might crave being in control. probably wants to be their own boss. always trying to improve or reinvent themselves. you probably have sex, or masturbate every day. might have sexual relations with co-workers. the shower or bath might be a good setting for sex to these ppl. might like anal lol.

celebrities:Shakira,Demi Moore,Snoop Dogg,Michael Jackson

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🤍

loving. extremely passionate. can be empathetic. might attract scorpio/pluto placements a lot. lovers may be overzealous, overprotective, and/or envious or you might be this way. relationships can be life changing. can be low key aggressive. love, and being vulnerable can terrify these ppl. might keep their personal relationships private. selfless in the bedroom. all abt pleasing their partner. might be into spanking, or butt rubs lmao. face to face positions are a turn on for these folks too.

celebrities:Rihanna,Kourtney Kardashian,Barack Obama,Orlando Bloom

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🪐

the ultimate lol. great intuition, has a knack for conspiracy theories, psychology, astrology, and probably taboo things. likes getting in trouble😈. sensual, and has major sexual appeal. people smart. thinks about sex, mortality, the unknown, and just general dark themes a lot. either fears or embraces death, maybe both. ambitious, and usually actually lives for a long time. experience makes these ppl wise. goes through a lot of transformations in life. understanding. a lot of ppl envy ppl of this placement, mostly bc of their sex appeal/attractiveness. powerful in some way lol. likes that moneyyy. can be possessive, either with possessions or ppl or both lol. sex can be life changing and intense. into or open to bondage, d/s, rough sex, etc but might like it romantic, erotic and sensual too.has an amazing sex drive.

celebrities:Princess Diana,Brigitte Bardot,Marlon Brando,Bruce Lee

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🌺

full of curiosity. analyzes. deep rooted. might be emotionally invested when it comes to the beliefs/beliefs may take over their life lol. when in college, might major in psychology, solving, investigating, etc. justice is important to these individuals. judgement also, and self obsessed. likes big butts w/a side of thighs. sex is fun to these ppl, and they’re probably up to trying new things. lube is your friend. probably has a big penis/fat cat lmao.

celebrities:Nicki Minaj,Winona Ryder,Robin Williams,Frank Sinatra

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🥂

charming, and creative. might come off as standoffish or just disrespectful lol. private reputation, and keeps things in the dark. might be known for being inappropriate. controversial reputation. known for being passionate among peers. may be feared by some lol. can manipulate their way to the top. i can see someone with this screwing their boss/authority lol. into domination and bdsm. leash and whips.

celebrities:Bjork,Taylor Swift,Prince,Eminem

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝗹𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲👩‍🎤

friendship is a priority. friends are really enemies so watch out. friends might have scorpio/pluto energy in chart. kind. probably a good listener. the mysterious or quiet friend. you might not like when your friends bring around other ppl lmao. you don’t give your trust away easily, and prefer a small circle of friends. can be dismissive. might lose virginity to friends tbh or have sex w/their friends. experimental. group sex maybe. might get piercings on genitals

celebrities:Scarlett Johansson,Kylie Jenner,Chris Evans, Albert Einstein

𝗣𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗳𝘁𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲🧜‍♀️

selfless. intuitive. past life was full of intensity. might’ve had a public death in the past life. past life could’ve been filled with crime. these individuals can be distracted and very sensitive. wild imagination. dreams can seem so real, and dark. dreams might predict things. may take secrets to the grave. gotta have a strong and emotional connection to want to have sex. won’t sleep with just anyone, unless they need to cope with something. might try to please too much during sex but you should focus on your wants and needs too. foot play is also big here.

celebrities:Marilyn Monroe,Madonna,Steve Jobs,Tom Hanks

[fandomsconfuseme]

Just saw Turning Red and I have a lot of thoughts

So we get a movie with girls with loud personalities, a good friendship and specific interests, where they are not bullied but instead have a mostly positive middle school experience? Sign me up

First of all, the animation was freaking great, all the texture and the color palette really hold it all together. The facial expressions were also very well done and funny as hell at times, and I loved seeing the difference in body language according to the different characters and how it related to their personalities.

Second, it showed so many different topics in the most casual ways, at some times holding up old stereotypes and throwing them in the trash or destigmatizing topics that we should be talking more openly about with children. I have a lot of thoughts on this area so will be making a list:

- Distigmatization of menstruation with conversations about how normal it is and showing pads on screen. The fact that so many people are freaking out about a kids movie openly addressing periods (something that most likely appears during childhood/puberty) just shows how much we actually need to have these themes on movies. It's not an adult topic, kids are supposed to know about it and understand it before it actually happens. - The portrait of both the kids having special interests in which they are very invested in and them discovering romantic interest and starting having crushes as pre-teens in a non-creepy and realistic way were both really nice to see. - The queer subtext placed in the way the friend group was shipping Priya with the goth girl. - Diverse cast with characters with different bodies types an ethnicities. Also, liked the casual placement of a background-character with a wheelchair in the concert. - One of the male characters being a very enthusiastic fan of a guy from a boy band and screaming 'I love you dude' only to be answered with love from his friends. - One of the male singers wearing makeup and nail polish. - The way they basically said 'my body my choice' with the 'my panda my choice' and what that represents. - Pleasantly surprised with the fact that the kid that made fun of Mei didn't turn out to have a crush on her. I am tired of that old 'oh if he annoys you or makes fun of you then he likes you' like no just don't pass to your kids a mentality in which they associate people treating them badly with love. - Just the casual mention of body smell because if you didn't have the experience of smelling like a red panda during puberty I envy you. - And lastly, and this might be a very small thing nobody cares about, I really liked that scene where you see some boys running and them trying to hype up one of the boys that is having a harder time. I was an asthmatic kid for whom gym class was a nightmare sometimes and this is once again one small example of how this movie takes all the traumatic and bad parts of middle-school and throws it away, only to serve you the rest in a warm blanket.

Now let's go into the mommy issues...

"I'm changing mom, I'm finally figuring out who I am. But I am scared it will take me away from you." "Me too. I see you Mei-Mei. You try go make everyone happy but are so hard on yourself. And if I taught you that I am sorry. So don't hold back for anyone."

I really loved how this movie portrayed a young kid trying to overcome the weight of perfectionism and need to please that she got from her mom, as well as how it showed in a very simple way generational trauma. Her mom is a good mother but she messes up. The important part is that she apologizes for it, owns up to her mistakes and accepts the parts of her child she can't quit understand.

Now to some less important thing I wanna comment on: - The dad gives me Fukuo from Kiki's delivery service vibes and I adored him, the way he was always there for both his wife and Mei and how he expressed his love made me feel warm inside. - The 4 Town songs were actually good?? I was not expecting them to be as catchy as they were but I am currently listening to them on spotify while writing this review. - My headcanon is that Miriam is queer, she feels very coded through her style choices and mannerisms and as soon as she started to appear on screen I was relating to the kiddo and couldn't unsee it. Also at times it seemed like she had a crush on Mei but honestly I like it both as that or as her just being a really good friend. She was honestly such a sweet character and the fact that Mei's mom didn't approve of her specifically made me go into protective mode.

[amor-immortalem]

You’re Important to Me part 4

Part 1 | part 2| part 3

Genre: angst/comfort

———————————————————————-

Chat: Troublemaker (affectionate)

Lucifer: Come home immediately. We need to talk.

Mammon: bout what? If its one of your shitty punishments. Think I’ll pass.

Lucifer rested his head on his desk letting out a groan. The second-born was frustrating him to no end. However, the first-born supposes he’s made him this way from everything he’s put him through. Picking up the pill bottle, he rolled it in his hand and watched as the contents slid from one side to the other. He placed them in a locked door in his desk as he thought about how they had been this close to losing yet another sibling.

A soft rapping on the office door pulled his attention back to the present.

“Enter,” he sat up straight as the guest joined him. It was Levi.

“Do you think Mammon still loves us. I-I’ve really been thinking about what’s been going on….. about our family. What if he leaves us? We lost Lilith. I-I don’t want to lose him too…” The Avatar of Envy’s voice quaked. Back when they were angels they were once close- almost even closer than the twins.

“I’m sure he does, Levi.” His response was hollow words. If Lucifer was being honest, he didn’t really know how Mammon felt about them currently. If he were the one in Mammon’s shoes, he would absolutely despise his brothers.“He’s currently refusing to come home, however. It’s likely that he knows what went on today and that’s why he broke up with the human we all know he cherishes so deeply. He didn’t want us to know.”

“I knew it! He hates us and never wants to see our faces again.”

“Leviathan, I never said that.” Lucifer’s voice was stern. “Please calm down before you throw yourself into a panic attack. He has to come home eventually, and we’ll all talk then- if not tonight then definitely tomorrow morning. For now, maybe you should go play one of your games. If you’d like I could join you to help take your mind off this whole debacle.”

Levi nodded his head slowly. “ I would appreciate that….. Actually, I had made this rpg specifically to play-test with Mammon but if you wanted to….we could play it together.”

“That’s a wonderful idea, Levi.”

Finally deciding to make his way home, Mammon pushed open the heavy doors to the house. The last thing he wanted to do was face his brothers right now. He already anticipated their reactions. The teasing and mocking that would be thrown his way- there wasn’t any escape for him now, was there? At least no one was here at the moment- that much he could be greatful for.

As he made his way up to his room, the demon made sure to avoid the places he knew his brothers would frequent at this time of night. Once there, he slipped inside and tossed the bag of clothes he had modeled in today from the top of of the stairs into the walk in closet with practiced precision. When he turned his head, he saw her small, blurry form just lying there on the couch.

“Why’re you in here? Ya got a room if your own dontcha?”

“I just….. sorry. I pushed too hard, didn’t I?” Arella’s voice sounded hurt. “It was just that I thought this might be the only place I could go and you’re brothers wouldn’t come looking for me. I’m still really angry with them. Not that they would anyway, not with how I screamed and yelled at them earlier...”

“And Lucifer didn’t kill ya on the spot? Its a miracle you’re alive after that.” He let out a chuckle. “I can’t tell if you’re incredibly brave or just plain dumb.”

“Maybe both…..” Arella sighed, “I… um… I’ll go back to my room now.” As she stood and made her up the staircase, he could feel the sadness radiating off of their pact mark.

“‘Rella, wait.” He grabbed her by the arm. “Don’t go. I don’t mind if ya stay…. We should talk about earlier, okay?”

He watched as she nodded a small frown on her face. Now that he could see her more clearly, he noticed the puffy eyes and tear tacks streaked down her cheeks. Now he just felt worse.

“I was thinkin’ real hard about this morning and I’m sorry for what I said earlier.” He started, “I don’t… I don’t really think we should break up…. I know you were just trying to help. That you were worried and scared for me.”

“I was…. Can I tell you something?“ she asks as he nods. “Seven years ago, I lost my little brother and then six months later my mother to suicide. One to cyber bullying, the other because she was so consumed with grief from the loss of a child that she saw no way to go on…. Do you know what was like….. to find their bodies? To realize you could have helped them if you had just paid attention and seen the warning signs? It still affects me to this day….They were the only blood related family I had left until I had found a new family here in the Devildom with you and your brothers. A-and then when you were saying all those things last night, I- I flashed back to the night I had found my brother but instead of him it was you and I-I-”

Mammon pulled the human tight against his chest in what could have been a bone crushing hug if he wasn’t careful and she buried her face in his chest. Her body shook with with muffled sobs.

“I’m sorry. I was running my mouth without thinking ‘bout what that might do to everyone- worst of all you….” He leaned down, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “I wont say things like that ever again. No matter how I’m feelin’.

He walked her back towards the bed, letting her get in as he went to go change into some more comfortable clothes for sleeping. He joined her in bed shortly after, pulling her close as he wiped the stray tears from his cheeks. Arella moved closer so she could lay her head on his chest listening to his heartbeat, her crying reduce to quiet sniffles and hiccups by this point.

“Ya know, I think you just wasted your breath when you were yellin’ at my brothers earlier…. I think to them, I’ll just always be the family screw up. I’m already dreading the teasing I’ll get tomorrow at breakfast….”

“It had to be done, though. I think I managed to set them all straight….If you could have seen the look on their faces when I lost control of my temper and fried all the electronics in the common room or when I commanded Asmo to sit so hard he crashed face first into the floor….”

“Wait…you did what?” He quirked an eyebrow as he stared down at her before breaking into a soft laugh, “Ya really are something else, Hon, ya know that? I’ve never met someone who would fight for me like this before- who would call my brothers out on their bullshit.”

“Only because I know you don’t deserve to be treated this way…. You… you deserve good things and to be treated well by the people who you love most.” She yawned as she stretched out a little more in his embrace. “And because I love you and I would be lost if anything were to happen to you.” Her eyes were starting to slip closed.

“I love you too, babe.” The demon hummed as he started to card his fingers through her hair. As soon as he was sure she was out like a light he pressed his lips to the crown of her heard once more.

“Thank you for being here on my worst days, for being my little ray of sunshine down here in the dark.”

Once the morning came around, most of Mammon’s brothers gathered in the common room. They were awaiting the entrance of the Avatar of Greed as it was nearly breakfast time.

Lucifer had figured Mammon would be avoiding them as if they had the plague, so he instructed Beel to drag him in here by any means necessary. They all knew he was successful when they heard Mammon let out a surprised yelp and the clattering of a bowl against the floor.

“C’mon, Beel, Let me go!”

“Not until we all talk.”

“Talk? What’s there to talk about? I didn’t do nothin’ so let me go!’

Both demons soon entered the dining room as the sixth-born sat his older on the couch facing all of them, holding him down by his shoulders so Mammon couldn’t escape despite how he squirmed and tried to wiggle his way out of Beel’s grasp.

“Mammon, stop struggling.” It was a request from eldest, a chance to cooperate. “We all have some words we’d like to say to you.”

Mammon froze at that statement. Here it came: all the ridicule and teasing. He wanted to run. He was the second strongest of them, maybe if he tried hard enough, he could shake his little brother off and get away. What good would that do him though? His brothers would just corner him later anyway so maybe it was just best to get it over with now.

He looked towards his brothers’ blurry figures, a million different thoughts rushing his head. He couldn’t tell their expressions from this distance but they had to be smiling, right- ready to laugh at him any minute now. His body tensed as he braced himself for the harsh sting of their words.

“Mammon, we’re sorry,” Asmo was the first to speak up after a short moment of silence, “We love you so much even though we suck at showing it.”

“You did so much for us after we fell,- you still do a lot for us even now,” the seventh-born picked his head up from the table,“And I don’t think we ever told you how much we all appreciate it…. If it weren’t for you, I don’t even think we would still be a family… don’t forget, you’re the one who kept us all in line when Lucifer would lock himself away in his office back then.”

“I know we act like you’re just a burden to us,” Satan started, “but I think all of us would agree that life would be so boring without you here.”

“Yeah, I-I mean who else would take the time to play games with me when I’m down in the dumps?” Levi asked.

“Or risk getting strung up from the chandelier to get me the food that I want from the human world?” Beel cut in.

“Or compliment me on my outfit or hair no matter what form I choose to take for the day. Or is always there to hype me up when I’m having a bad day? Hell, you even gave up the position of DevilStyle’s cover model just for me! Honestly I think you might be the best big brother out there.”

“We know about all the things you’ve done in secret for us- the things you don’t take credit for,” Lucifer smiled softly, “I’m proud to call you my brother for that. We love you and while you may make some poor life choices from time to time, our lives just wouldn’t be the same without you.”

Mammon looks at them in a daze. Was this really happening? His brothers were…. Apologizing? To him of all people? This had to be a dream. There was no reality in which his brothers really cared about him. The second-born pinched the skin on his arm. That’s what you did to check if you were dreaming, right?

Harder, harder he pinched until the spot was sure to bruise. It wasn’t until Beelzebub placed his hand over his that Mammon realized he wasn’t dreaming. This was reality.

Tears welled in his eyes as he processed the words he just heard. One tear fell down his cheek soon followed by another then another until eventually the demon let out a sob.

“Th-This ain’t real! It ain’t!” The second-born yelled, his body shaking as he sobbed harder. “I’m still dreamin’. I-I gotta be! None of this is real…”

His brothers moved to embrace him- first the sixth-born, then the eldest and then the youngest. One by one, the rest of their brothers followed suit until the seven of them all somehow managed to end up on the floor in one giant cuddle pile, his face pressed into Lucifers as they allowed their brother to cry out all the tears he’d been bottling up for all these centuries.

It seemed they were going to be there a while- Good thing Lucifer had called Diavolo to tell him they wouldn’t be attending RAD today. That this was a more important matter to attend to.

“This stops today, Lucifer announced to his siblings once Mammon had stopped crying. “From today on, the six of us will make a conscious effort to change the ways we’ve talk to and treated you.”

“And if we get too out of hand, feel free to put us in our place,” Belphegor chuckled. “We can be blockheads from time to time.”

“The point is,” Asmodeus sighed as he hugged his brother a little tighter, “We all messed up big time. We just want to make you feel loved and appreciated again- like you’re an important part of this family.”

“We lost Lilith.” It was Beel’s turn to speak. “We’re not losing you too.”

Mammon smiled at his brothers’ words. Finally, he had thought, finally they were showing their true feelings to him after all these centuries.

“Thanks guys…..” the demon’s voice sounded cracked and strained from all the crying he had done earlier. “Even after everything that’s happened I wouldn’t trade y’all for the world. I love you guys.”

A chorus of ‘I love you too’s sounded from the group of demons as another family hug commenced. Eventually, as hours passed, one by one, they had all fallen asleep, each with a smile on their face and still huddled together.

Arella eventually found them in that state. With a soft smile she grabbed the blanket they often used for movie night and draped it over them heading back to her room so she wouldn’t disturb them.

———————————————————————-

Taglist: @gallantys

Masterlist 2

[wenwenbittercake]

Inuin and Y/N

(This is a normal AU where Inuin and KoKo are your best friend and Inuin have a crush on you but you like KoKo-nut more. He’s stuck between wanting to break their friendship and want to kiss you senselessly.)

Warnings:yandere contents, swearing, spicy🌶🌶

(Sorry for late posts, I just got really depressed after my recent submission got 4 likes 😫😫😫Sorry if I haven’t written your submission because it’s probably not finished yet or It’s too uncomfortable for me to write. With that, enjoy.)

“Hey Inui!”

Someone hug Inui from behind making him snap out of his daydream. He turn around from his chair to see a familiar face that create a tint of blush on his cheeks.

“Y/N why are you here this early?”

“Early? Look around you dumb ass.” KoKo said as he comes into the class.

Inui lazily look around him to see the class empty. He must had fallen asleep.

“Oh.”

“Wht do you mean “Oh”? Pack your stuff or we’re leaving you behind!”

“KoKo don’t be so harsh on Inui, he’s just tired from his part time job.”

KoKo got a frond on his face when you defend Inui. Inui on the other hand blushes while putting his things in his back.

“Oh yea? For a person who sleeps around in class of cause he’s going to work in that shabby motorcycle shop.”

“Hey.” You warn Koko. Both of you look each other and inspect Inui’s face.

Inui is used to the constant slanders and being beaten around by Koko, It’s not that he’s a bully, he’s just like that. He would apologies later about it but what he said is true. Koko is a smart kid who get all A’s in his class. He’s the brightest kid in their little friend group. So, the brightest flower catches the most beautiful butterflies, and that butterfly is you.

For the first time in his life, he craves for someone and that someone is you. He misses you 24/7. Always wanting to see your face, hear your voice and feel your touch. He even goes as far as going to your house one night after work to see you. But unfortunately, you were asleep. It doesn’t matter much when he climbs to your window to see you sleeping so soundly.

You can call him a psychopath but he’s just making sure your save by hacking into your phone and looking through all your social info and private messages.

You can call him a creep for following you around at night making sure no wolfs can catch a cute bunny like you.

You can call him a sociopath for lying to you as he only sees you as a friend when he craves to feel more of you then your hands.

He doesn’t care what you call him, he’s doing all this to keep you save form the dangerous people out there or to feed his desires.

Now you both are in a hotpot restaurant. Koko apologies to Inui by treating hotpot and BBK to both of you. All of you talk about school life, how hard to weekly test was or gossip about that one kid in class that reminds the teacher about the homework. Noting goes into Inui mind as he’s too focus on you and Koko interactions.

Koko is talking about these facts he knows of, and you listen to him with wide eyes. Then he whispers something in your ears making you blush. Inui clench his jaw seeing that. Koko looks proud that he’s getting all your attention to himself. On the other hand, Inui watch Koko and you with a sad look with a dash of jealousy.

“Oh, look who’s jealous.” All the spotlight is now on Inui making him slightly uncomfortable.

“Why are you all looking at me?”

“Oh, we all know you’re the jelly one here.” He teases as you switch your seat near him.

You close your space between you and Inui, your face so close to his, a slight movement from him can make him go for a kiss. Your eyes half lid and tease him as you trace his collar with your slender fingers. Not touching him but so close to. Inui’s breath become heavy, his head even feel cloudy to the situation, both of you look at each other’s eyes with lust.

“Tell me baby.”

He just wants to push his head forward and give a deep long kiss, but Koko’s clap snaps him out of hid fantasies. You giggle and hop off Inui’s lap and go sit beside Koko.

“Koko did you see that?”

“Yes, you did a great job.” He said as he places his arms around your shoulder.

“What’s going on?” Inui looks confused.

“It’s a prank! Got you!” You shout and laugh with Koko. In that moment Inui felt both embarrassed and mad. It’s definitely not your idea. Your inexperience ass would never. It gotta be Koko’s.

“You guys are dicks.” He said as he stood up a leave.

“Inui wait- “you were about to stop him when Koko pull you back in his arms.

“Leave it, he’s fine. He’s just a little embarrassed.”

That Bitch

That night Inui can’t get you out of his head. He can’t when you look so cute and sexy when you did that half lid move. The way you touch him felt so different from how you use to touch him. So soft and teasing. He tries to memorize it, but it slowly fades away. He can only remember how hot and lustful it felt. How he got hard just by your voice. He needs it again.

“Inui, I’m going to ask Y/N out.” Inui nearly chokes on his lunch.

“Wait what?”

“Yea I’m gonna ask her out.”

“Wait wait where? When.”

“Tonight, at the playground we use to go at.”

“Wait isn’t it too fast?”

“Wdym it’s fast? Look I realize my feelings for her are real and I just need to let it out. I just want you to know that.”

Inui looks shock as Koko left from the cafeteria. No way this is happening. His best friend with the girl he loves the most. He tries to think positive. Maybe it’s the best for you. Koko is perfect for you, he’s smart, he’s rich, he can fulfil everything you need. He can make you happy. But seeing you with Koko make his heart aches. The thought of how Koko can make you feel complete tortures him every bit.

The rain was pouring like there no tmr. He looks at his clock, 7:30 pm. Koko is going to ask you out at 8 and he’s here sweeping floors. What a fucking loser, he thought of himself. He looks through his phone to pass time and see your message.

Koko told me to wait at the playground we use to play. Idk why but I feel like something serious is going to happen.

I want you to come by that’s all.

It’s fine if you’re busy.

What is he doing here? Y/N needs him. He’s supposed to do whatever you desire right?

He rash out of the shop, even Drakun was shocks at the speed. He run desperately like a predator meets his prey. This is his only chance to feel honest with you. After Koko ask you out, it would be too late. You will be Koko’s. The thought of it filled him with agony.

He stops in front of the playground; his eyes scatter the play. There he finds you standing there with a yellow umbrella. He knows it your cause he bought that umbrella for you.

“Inui? What are you doing here? Omg your soaked.”

He stands in front of you, his eyes fill with desires. He feels like burning. The only thing that’s keeping him cool is the rain. He felt happy when he realizes Koko is nowhere to be found.

“Inui?” You look up to him with wide eyes.

Fuck Y/N

He pulls you in his arm and kiss you. It feels so longing. You yelp in shock giving him a chance to enter his tongue in your mouth. You panic causing your umbrella to drop. He let out all his needs, his urges with action. His fantasies are becoming a reality. Your taste, your touch, the way you whimper in his hold. It all feels so good, he’s starting to feel feverish.

The rain pours all over both of you. It feels like you’re in a movie. Actually, you’re not sure if you like Koko or Inui. You’ve spent so much time with them yet, you still don’t have a sure answer when it comes to both of them but now. You’re sure now.

You both parted from your feverish kiss, you look at each other eyes. You look at him with wide eyes, your lips swollen. You hold on Inui’s shirt, trying to not fall from your shaking knees.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I just can’t take it anymore.”

“I-it’s actually fine. I kinda like you so..’’

“Wait are you serious?”

“Of cause I’m serious! What you don’t wanna take responsibility now?”

“No, it’s just- “

“Shut up and just hug me.” You hide your embarrassed face in Inui’s chest. He chuckles at your action and wrap his arms around you tightly.

“Let’s go home.”

From a far, a man with a chain earring stood silently behind trees as both love birds left. He grips his umbrella tight as he glares at Inui. The envy he’s feeling is strong enough to kill a man.

“That Bitch”

(Thank you for reading my fanfic. Also sorry if I made a mistake or it's not that good. This is my first time writing a yandere character so forgive me. 🙏🙏🙏also i'm sorry I don't put the artist name for the headline. I don't know the artist who draw it that's why. If you know, ur more than welcome to tell me. Thank you ❤🌹🙏🙏)

[maybe-theres-hope]

Tarlos Fic - Dinner Date

3.2k | T | Warnings: Blood, Injuries (mostly minor) | Contains: Judd/Carlos friendship, Tarlos being perfect, blue Camaro (rip)

Read on AO3

“So, what are your plans for the night?” Nancy asked as they exited the ambulance, their shift nearly over as long as the bell didn’t go off in the next ten minutes. 

TK smiled to himself for a moment before he spoke. “Well, Carlos is taking me to Jeffrey’s, so…”

“Holy mother,” Nancy breathed, looking at him with obvious envy. “Do you guys have a ten year anniversary or something coming up? Did he get some kind of commendation at work? Because I know your last one was like a month ago, so.”

“No, no anniversary, that’s in a couple of months. And its three years, Nance.” He chose to ignore her muttering about their mushiness ‘aging me ten years’. “And nothing from work that I know of. Maybe he just loves me?” TK couldn’t stop grinning while they stocked the bus and readied for the handover. 

“He loves you crap ton! Their wagyu strip steak is a hundred and twenty-five dollars!” Nancy had her phone out, obviously googling the menu. 

“Well at least we’ll save money on wine,” TK said with a chuckle.

“I’ve heard of the place by reputation but like, dude, who ever gets the chance to actually go there?”

“TK it seems,” Tommy cut in. “Why don’t you go on? We got it here and you’re gonna need at least an hour to pick out an outfit.”

“And gel your hair. You and your dad are way more alike than you want to admit,” Nancy added with a roll of her eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. You sure, Cap? I can stay and help?”

“I’m sure, kiddo. Go get dolled up for your man. Eat a few bites for us, yeah?” Tommy yelled at his retreating figure. She and Nancy looked at each other with grins as they caught the little skip in his step. 

“So, what do you think the occasion is?”

Tommy looked back at Nancy with a gleam in her eye. “I can wager a guess, but I don’t want to jinx it.” Nancy just gave her a look and went back to restocking.

--

Around 8 p.m., Owen was sitting in his office toying with his phone in his hand, smiling at his last text exchange. 

we’re just leaving the house now, wish me luck!

you’re not gonna need it, kid :)

“Not if I know my son anyway,” Owen said aloud to the empty room. He wondered if it’d happened yet. No incoherent string of emoji’s from TK yet, so he doubted it. 

He was shoving the phone back into his pocket with the bell went off. 

--

“Alright guys,” Owen said into the mic from the Captain’s chair. “Dispatch says three vehicles involved, two still on the road and one went over the side into the ravine. Police are on their way but we’ll probably beat ‘em there. Strickland, Marwani, soon as we get there I want you to harness up and get down in that ravine. Judd, you too. You’ll be in command down there and I’ll stay up top with the other two vehicles. Everybody else you’re with me, got it?”

A chorus of “Copy that, Cap,” and suddenly they were on the scene. 

--

“Marjan, Paul, we’re goin’ down!” Judd called to them as the rest of the crew went over to the silver Prius and black Mazda that were crumpled in the middle of the two-lane highway. Judd wasn’t a prayin’ man, but he sent up a little something to the man upstairs that this went their way. It looked bad. 

Paul arrived at his side first, strapped into his gear. “Marjan’s grabbing the bag from the truck, she’s coming.” 

“Alright. We’ll go down this way,” Judd said, pointing to a safe-ish stretch of hillside. “Can’t see the other car from here but dispatch said bystanders saw it go over. Probably just hidden in the trees.”

“Okay guys, let’s do this!” Marjan called, harnessed and carrying the medical bag and a backboard. “TK’s gonna be sad he missed this. Medical doesn’t get to harness up a lot and I know he loved it. He coulda helped.”

“Nah, he’s got better things tonight. Carlos was takin’ him to Jeffrey’s,” Paul said with a waggle of his eyebrows.

“Ohh, fancy,” Marjan said with a smile. “What’s the occasion?”

They’d reached the bottom and were starting to look through the brush and low-hanging trees for a vehicle. 

“Don’t know,” Paul answered. “But I think Cap’s in on it somehow.”

“What?”

“Yeah,” Judd cut in as he whacked a few branches out of his way. “Carlos came by the station a few weeks ago, and they sat up in Cap’s office for an hour before he left grinnin’ like a possum eatin’ a sweet tater.” 

“I have no idea what that means,” Paul said with a laugh. 

“Hey guys, look!” Marjan called from a few yards to the left. The other two went to her position and saw what she’d found. A track in the underbrush where it had been torn at and flattened. “Think this is the place.”

“Let’s go,” said Judd. They followed the path through the brush for a couple of yards before they caught sight of it: taillights. “Alright, Marjan you go on the passenger side, I got the driver. Paul you see if you can clear some of that brush off the back in case the doors are jammed and we gotta get ‘em out that’a way.”

Visibility was still low despite the lights of the car and their flashlights, but as they approached they saw the car wrapped around the trunk of a tree on the passenger side. “I don’t know if I can get in there, Judd, but I’ll try,” Marjan said as she broke out into a jog.

“Wait!” Paul cried. Judd looked over at him, and he would have said such a thing couldn’t happen to a calm and collected person like Paul, but his face had gone ashen. “That’s Carlos’s car,” he said on a breath. 

“What?” In the dark, now that he was really looking, he could see they were coming up on—what used to be—a blue Camaro. 

“I’m sure of it. TK bullied him into putting that sticker on the back because he said it was too pristine and it needed personality.” He shone his flashlight at the rear bumper and sure enough, there was a SXSW sticker half ripped off from the path the car had taken to get there. 

“Come on,” Judd said, heart rate kicking up.

“Should we call Cap?” Paul asked.

“No, we stay down here and do our jobs, and he stays up there and does his. We’ll get ‘em.” His voice sounded numb even to his own ears, but he was determined. 

“They were on their way to dinner,” Paul said lowly.

“Yeah, probably takin’ the backroads to avoid traffic,” Judd said, shaking his head. Fate was hell sometimes.

When they reached the car, Marjan was yelling. “TK! TK can you hear me?” She turned to Judd. “I can’t get in there. The tree trunk is halfway into the car, probably pinning him to the console. He’s unresponsive.” Her face was also pale, but determined. 

Judd went to the driver’s side and saw Carlos, head hanging to the side facing the broken window. He tried the door as he called out. “Carlos? Hey Carlos, come on buddy. Can you hear me?” The door wouldn’t budge; Judd figured the car had rolled a couple of times coming down the hill, crumpling it like a tin can. Then he heard a soft groan.

He looked up, and one of Carlos’s eyes was trying to open. The other was swollen shut, where he’d probably hit his head on the steering wheel before the airbag deployed. Half his face had burn marks from it. 

“Hey, hey Carlos, look at me, that’s it.” That one eye tracked around before it landed on Judd, drawn to the light of the flashlight on his helmet. “Hey man. We’re gonna get you out okay? Now, can you move your fingers and toes for me?” Judd stuck his head into the window to see down in the floor boards. “Alright, likely no spinal damage. How’s your head?”

“Hurts. Shoulder, too.” His voice was barely audible. 

“Okay, it looks like you dislocated it,” Judd said as he prodded his left shoulder. “I don’t see anything broken but we’ll have to get you out to determine that.”

“TK—“ a wheeze, “TK…first. Been out…a while.”

Judd peered over to the passenger side, where TK was shoved almost fully into the center console, head laid back on the headrest and his face covered in blood. Marjan and Paul were still hard at work outside trying to clear a path into the car. 

“We can’t get to his side just yet, but we can get you out first and then we’ll be able to pull him out this way, okay? We wanna focus on you right now.”

“Alive.”

“Yeah, you’re alive, Carlos. You’re not gonna leave us yet,” he said as he assessed the door panels where they could cut through with the saws they brought. 

“No. TK. Weak, but…alive,” Carlos breathed out, coughing through the end.

“We’ll make sure he’s alive, okay?” Judd said, trying not to lose his professionalism at this whole messed up situation.

“He is.” Judd stopped looking around and looked back at Carlos. The man raised his right hand just as much as he was able, showing where he had two fingers on TK’s radial pulse. 

“Good, that’s good Carlos,” Judd assured him. That meant Carlos had had some minutes of consciousness after the accident before they showed up. “Was he talking at all? After you hit the tree?”

“Little. Minutes, maybe.”

“That’s good, that’ll help. Alright Carlos, we’re gonna get this door off so I’m gonna cover you with this while we do okay?” Judd waited for a small nod before he covered Carlos’s face and torso with his own turnout coat. 

After an agonizing four minutes, the door popped off in a shower of metal and broken glass. Judd removed the coat and went back in to assess. “Carlos? How you doin’?”

“Tired. But won’t…sleep. Promise. That’s bad.”

“You learn a few things from your Paramedic boyfriend?” Judd said with a watery smile.

“Mmm.”

“Judd, I got the back cleared. Maybe we can get in there to at least check TK’s vitals,” Paul informed them. 

“Get on it, I’ma try to get Carlos here out onto this backboard. Marjan, radio for another backboard and have two RA’s ready to go topside!”

“Copy that!” Judd had to admire those two. They never let their professionalism slip too far, though he could see they were worried sick. He could relate. He wouldn’t relax until both of the boys were back up the hill and on the way to the hospital.

From the looks of things, maybe not even then. But he had hope.

“Alright, Carlos, I’m gonna grab your legs and behind your shoulders here and pull you out, okay? It’s gonna hurt like hell, but it’ll be quick.”

“Wait.”

Judd stopped cold.

“Left…pocket. Please.”

“You want me to get at your left pocket?” A nod. “Alright, hang on.”

Judd carefully shifted Carlos’s leg so he could reach into his slacks, which had probably been part of a very nice suit at the beginning of the night. His fingers searched until they hit a small bump, an object no bigger than a baseball, soft velvet over a hard shell. He sucked his lips between his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut for a moment as he pulled it free in his hand. 

“Keep it…safe…for me?”

Judd looked down at the little black box for a moment, then clutched it tight in his hand before transferring it one of the innermost pockets of his turnout. 

“Of course, man. I will guard this with my life.” He looked up and saw Marjan coming back with another backboard. “Alright, buddy. It’s go time.”

Carlos gave a weak nod and winced when Judd started to pull. 

--

“Welcome back, man. You had us worried there for a bit.”

Carlos opened his good eye to see Judd sitting at his bedside, smiling softly. It took a moment to remember where he was. Hospital. Accident. Tree.

“TK—“

“Is fine. Banged up and will need crutches for a few weeks, not to mention a killer headache with no meds, but he’s fine. All things considered.”

“Where is he?”

“On his way, so you just stay put, okay? You’re pretty banged up, too, ya’know.”

Carlos shifted a bit and winced. His left arm was in a sling, his head bandaged over his left eye, and his right side hurt like hell.

“Broken rib when the tree went into TK’s door, door went into TK, TK went into the console, then the console went into you. He’s got a femoral fracture in his right leg but like I said, all things considered, you’re both pretty well off for how far you fell and probably rolled.” 

“Yeah, he said his leg had gone numb but he could still move his toes. He made sense for about five minutes, then started talking all jumbled, then went quiet. I uh…freaked out a bit after that. I thought he had…” Carlos trailed off, looking haunted. 

“Yeah, and you kept your fingers on his pulse that whole time. What you were able to tell us at the scene helped us treat him. You did good, Carlos.”

“Not good enough to swerve in time,” he said.

“Not your fault. And don’t you dare go thinkin’ it is. I don’t wanna hear it, Carlos,” Judd said in what TK called his Dad Voice. Stern and no room for argument. Carlos just nodded. 

“And uh, hey. I been waitin’ to give this back to you.” Judd stood and walked over to the bed, holding out a tiny black box. Carlos took it and cradled it against his chest. “It better be a nice one, cuz I about had a heart attack while I was showerin’ thinkin’ someone was gonna come get my pile a’clothes and take ‘em to the laundry while I was gone.”

“You didn’t open it?”

“Nah, I figure the big reveal? TK deserves that all to himself.” 

“Owen’s seen it,” Carlos countered, smirking.

“Uh huh. He approve?”

Carlos laughed. “He whistled and said I spent too much.”

“To impress the Cap it must be a lot,” Judd said with a small whistle of his own.

“Well, what was it Michael Scott said? Three years’ salary?”

Judd’s eyes almost popped out of his head, and Carlos laughed harder before wincing again at his broken rib. “I’m kidding, Judd. But I can tell you, no matter the cost, TK deserves the best and that’s what I hope I got.”

“You gonna make another reservation? Soon as y’all get back into fightin’ shape?”

Carlos looked down at the box again for a moment, contemplating. “I…don’t think so.”

Judd had a confused expression on his face but at that moment, a nurse was wheeling TK into the room, followed by most of the 126. Carlos’s face lit up like starlight at the sight of him.

“Hey, babe,” TK said with a smile. His leg was in a full cast, so the nurse was careful in maneuvering him around to Carlos’s bedside. 

“Hey, I feel like you should be the one in bed! Why are you out and about?”

“Because you were still asleep and he’s an absolute menace. We made multiple apologies to the staff on his behalf for the last hour,” Owen said as he walked into the room behind his crew. “He’s a stubborn little shit. Always has been, always will be. You sure you’re up for that?” He asked knowingly. TK was still looking at Carlos, blushing at his dad’s ribbing. Carlos met his eyes and said, “Yes.” He blushed more. 

“In fact,” Carlos continued. “I’m ready to get started. I’ve waited too long anyway. I mean, how many times do you and I have to beat death before I get the nerve to do this?” He said, looking into TK’s beautiful eyes which were looking confused. 

“What are you talking about, babe?”

“Look, I’m sorry this didn’t go how I planned. And I’m sorry I can’t get down on one knee right now, but. I hope you love me enough not to mind.” He lifted his good arm, his hand holding out the box. “A little help, Judd?”

“It’d be an honor,” the man said before leaning in and opening the box, since Carlos only had one good arm. 

At the sight of the contents of the box, TK’s eyes went as big as saucers. Surprise was written clearly over every inch of his features, which were all still beautiful even scarred and stitched up as they were at the moment. God, Carlos loved this man so much. 

“Tyler Kennedy Strand, you are the love of my life. I tried so many different scenarios in my head of how this speech would go, before I just said screw it, I’ll speak from the heart. You’re kind, funny, sexy, sweet, and everything in between. You can’t boil water and you absolutely can’t properly separate laundry. I have a dozen pink shirts as proof of that.” At this, the gathered group chuckled and TK went bright red. “Ah, but you also know just how to ease the tension from a long day just by hugging me on the doorstep. And I can always count on you to be there for me when the world gets too much, when what we see out there creeps in too far. And I want you to know, that I want to be that for you too, for the rest of our lives. So, TK. Will you marry me?”

The room was silent, apart from the hum and beeps of the machines. Everyone on the edge of their proverbial seats, but no one having any doubt to the outcome. 

“Oh, my God! Of course I’ll marry you! Yes, yes! Yes!” The last was said through TK’s fingers covering his red face, hiding the few tears that had started to fall. He held out his left hand to Carlos, who Judd had kindly helped by removing the ring from its box and handing it back to him. He slid it over TK’s finger, smiling like an idiot the whole time, barely registering the whoops and hollers of the 126 throughout the room. 

He only had eyes for TK. 

“I love you,” TK breathed through his happy tears.

“I love you too, baby. Always.”

“Oh, my God, dude, were you seriously surprised?” Nancy asked incredulously once the commotion had died down.

“Well…yeah? I didn’t expect this at all,” TK said, looking sheepish. 

“TK…my dude…he was taking you to Jeffrey’s! How could you not know?”

Once again, the room erupted in laughter and TK ducked his head again. Carlos reached out and touched his chin, catching his eyes again.

There was nothing but love there. 

CLEARLY every Tarlos fic I write has to have a proposal in it *shrug emoji* 

Also I wrote this in like an hour after I had a dream so please excuse any typos I didn’t catch!

Please reblog if you liked it! I would really really appreciate it :) Thank you for reading!

[magicjesuscup]

CoD AU?

Okay, so Roy’s supposed to represent the deadly sin, envy, but I just don’t see it. So here’s what I would’ve done:

Things between mundanes and thaumaturges used to be much more hostile in Invidia. One particularly violent clash left a young Grayson without a father and orphaned a pair of siblings. While Grayson’s mother was angry and resentful towards thaumaturges, his uncle believed that kind of attitude would keep them trapped in the hostile situation they were currently in. He tried to instill this mindset in Grayson.  When Grayson asked who killed his father, his uncle answered “hatred.” He told Grayson his father believed  mundanes and thaumaturges could live together as friends and he died protecting that belief. Grayson wanted his father’s beliefs to become reality. One day, he met the brother and sister I mentioned earlier. They had been living in their house and were afraid to go to an orphanage. Grayson brought them food and became their friend. He asked his mother if the kids could live with them, but his mother said no; she didn’t want any thaumaturges in her house. Anyway, one day, they stood up for Grayson while he was being bullied by thaumaturges. The sister fired the first shot in Grayson’s defense and the boy ended things by using ancient magic. When Grayson went home that night, he told his mom and uncle what he saw during dinner. Word of the boy’s ancient magic made its way to the king. 

Klaus ordered a guard to find the boy to test him, but secretly followed the guard. The boy used his ancient magic to make the guard leave their house. Klaus offered to adopt both him and his sister, and they agreed. The king renamed the boy Roy and the girl Sherry. The two worked very hard in their prince/princess lessons.  Grayson, meanwhile, went to a training camp for the army.

When Roy was old enough to name his own valet, he named Grayson. Grayson was unsure at first. He was in the military. He was a fighter, not a butler. He didn’t know all of the etiquette required of the position. Roy argued that etiquette was all about treating other people kindly. When he was starving and scared, no one else offered him food and their friendship. Grayson couldn’t say no after that. Grayson was normally pretty quite, but never sure what to say around polite company, so he tried to say as little as possible when in those situations. 

Anyway, that is the source of Roy’s envy. He’s jealous that the other princes are princes by birth. Two princes bear the brunt of his jealousy. The first is Rio. Rio immediately went on Roy’s list when he introduced himself as just Rio and had the nerve to tell Roy to drop all the prince stuff when talking to him. Like. Excuse you? Roy fought hard for that title, and you’re just going to throw yours away? But you know who Roy finds even more annoying? Lynt. Here Roy is being the princey-est prince to ever prince and he’s barely getting half the recognition as the others, and this idiot is trying to balance himself on the radiator to take a nap in the middle of class! Lynt is such a weirdo, but no one ever questions his authority as a prince. It’s not fair! Roy looks up to Toa and Guy. They do get the respect he wants, but they’re at least acting in a way that makes Roy think they’ve earned it. He befriends those who are in unenviable positions, which means his bff is Fenn. A prince who’s been effectively exiled from his kingdom and may not even inherit his throne? That’s rough buddy; we should hang out. 

Well, that’s how I would’ve written Roy anyway. I honestly thought that’s where his backstory was going when he was able to serve MC tea. I was a little disappointed when it was explained away as tea just being his hobby. Also, in the prince’s path when Roy goes on a date with MC to the town and that one random guy recognizes him? I thought he knew Roy from before his royal days and Roy was trying to distance himself from that. I was super disappointed to learn that Invidian royalty was just close to its citizens. 

I guess I also wanted to explain how Roy and Grayson met since I’ve played both their routes, and it’s never mentioned. 

[keijikunn]

Fate’s work

Pairing: Iwaizumi Hajime x fem!reader (there’s a slightly platonic Oikawa x reader but anyway) Genre: a big mess of angst and fluffy and I don’t even know anymore Summary: you and Hajime have initiated a concluded two cycles of life together: elementary and middle school passed by in a breeze. Now, high school graduation was approaching faster than you wanted and a statement terrifies you: Iwaizumi Hajime will not start the college cycle beside you Word count: ~3.5k

Author’s note: well well well it’s me after a while to post something out of blue! Special thanks to @hidden-otaku-stuff​ @toorusushijima​

WARNING: none

If you enjoy it please leave a comment or a reblog!! 

The first time you saw Iwaizumi Hajime was when his best friend – and soon to be yours as well – had hit your face with a volleyball during a p.e class. Oikawa Tooru still thinks it was a funny incident, despite the fact he bawled his eyes out at the sight of blood coming from your nose. Iwa, being the responsible kid he has always been, called the teacher to help you out – while calm down his crying friend.

Later that day, after the club activities, the two boys searched you in every class of their grade so Oikawa could (quoting the exact same words Iwaizumi said) “to apologize to her because of your clumsy self, Idiotkawa”. They just found you by the gates, your face didn’t look swollen neither did your nose appeared to be in a weird position – which Tooru thanked the skies, he definitely wouldn’t be able to deal with the fact he broke someone else’s nose (not that it was possible given the fact he was 6).

“C’mon Oikawa, say it” Hajime demanded pushing the other boy towards you, catching your attention.

“Oh, you’re the boy who spiked on my face” you stated before cracking a teasing smile. “I thought it was cool, until you started to cry. I wondered if you felt my pain by the way you were screaming”

“Hey!” Tooru whined, which made you and Hajime laugh even harder. “I was worried and came here to apologize, but I take everything back”

“You haven’t even said anything, idiot” Iwaizumi snickered, eyeing you as you proceeded to laugh once again. For a young boy, hajime wondered why his chest felt so warm watching you smile with something he had said.

“It’s fine, Oikawa-kun, right?” your laughter died down a bit, a hand raising to your face and poking your nose lightly. “It hurt quite a lot- but it already passed! See? I can touch it without feeling pain. And the name is L/n Y/n, so if any of you try to kill me with a ball, you can apologize properly”

Oikawa kept complaining, as the years passed by, that you just joined their little group of friends because you and Iwaizumi bounded by bullying him. The other boy would snort at that comment and proceed to tease him, while you’d laugh at their interaction. Ever since Iwaizumi Hajime was 6 years old, he had found your laugh one of the best sounds he had ever heard. And up until today he still agrees with it.

On the next day, you found the two boys at the same spot they talked on the previous day. You could tell oikawa was whining at something iwaizumi said and couldn’t help but crack a smile. Indeed they were best friends, bickering to no end and still remain next to each other. Wow, I envy these two.

“Good morning L/n-san” Iwa greeted as you approached them with larger steps. “How’s your face?”

“Morning, you two” you answered back with a small wave, stopping in front of them. “And it’s fine, Iwaizumi-kun. It hurt a lot at that moment, but now it’s all good”

And together, the three of you walked side to side to their classroom – coming to realize you’ve been classmates before even knowing. You blended well between Oikawa’s somewhat difficult personality and Iwaizumi’s bluntness towards the other boy. In no time, the duo became a trio and that just made sense.

Just like the sudden ball on your face, the years passed by in a blink of an eye. When you noticed, the three of you were graduating elementary school and joining Kitagawa Daiichi. There, they’ve joined the volleyball club and you decided to follow them as well – becoming the manager (a position you would hold until the very end of high school). It was definitely a process of growth for you: Oikawa became more ambitious; Iwaizumi progressively became better and better at his position. And you grew as the responsibility to maintain energetic boys at bay demanded you. But, the most important, your feelings for none other than Iwaizumi Hajime flourished in your heart.

It was funny how cliché your very first love came out to be: falling in love with your best friend… you didn’t know what made you like Iwaizumi more than just friends. Could it be the way he’d always care for you, making sure you don’t get hurt? (he says he’s traumatized after your first encounter). Maybe the way he plays volleyball, with such passion and desire to progress in ability?

Perhaps it was everything and much more. But, on top of anything, what made you fall for Iwaizumi Hajime was because he was himself. The blunt, slightly violent towards Tooru – but just because he genuinely cares about him, the hardworking and loyal boy he has always been. It could be a silly childhood crush- heck, you didn’t even care if it was a one-time-thing, liking Hajime was easy. And it was the purest thing ever. 

In the deepest part of your brain, at some point while you were growing up, the possibility of parting ways with the two boys crossed your mind. How could you not think about that when they were so talented volleyball players at such a young age? If they applied to any powerhouse school the answer would be a big yes. 

That was the reason why you approached your best friends after practice, when everyone had already left the gym and only Oikawa was training his jump serves. Iwaizumi was on the side lines ready to stop the other boy- he claimed he could easily headbutt the brunet once again like he did previously. 

“Guys…” you called quietly, completely different from your usual self around them. Looking at them made your eyes swell with tears and the clear image of them using different uniforms from the best volleyball clubs in Miyagi prefecture had appeared on your mind. “Do you know which school you’ll attend next year?”

“Why the sudden question, Y/n-chan?” Tooru asked without looking at you, Hajime, on the other hand, noticed how you fiddle with the hem of your jacket. “We don’t have to think about it right now, we have some time”

“It’s important, Idiotkawa, Y/n has a point,” Iwaizumi retorted, taking the volleyball from his hands. “Unlike this dummy, I wasn’t accepted in many schools… though Aoba Johsai accepted me”

“Seijoh?! Really, Hajime?” the excitement didn’t pass unnoticed by them, even the hint of relief was hidden there. “Wow, congratulations!! And you, Tooru-chan? Did Shiratorizawa accept you?”

“I’m not going to the same school as Ushiwaka,” he huffed, crossing his arms, a pout forming on his face. “So I’m following Iwa-chan”

“As always, dumbass” his friend shot back with a teasing grin. It was enough for a bickering start between them, leaving you with your own thoughts. 

At the age of fourteen, you don’t have many worries about life. So, the thought of going to different schools as those two who you knew since you were six years old was terrifying. I’ll have three more years with them. You wouldn’t say goodbye to Oikawa and Iwaizumi. Not yet, at least. 

“And you Y/n- hey, why are you crying?” Hajime shouted surprised, he stopped on his tracks - with hands stopping Tooru. You wiped your tears quickly with the sleeve of the track, to no avail since they kept falling, and smiled. “Oi, why are you smiling and crying?”

“I’m just… happy” it was true. You were not ready to say goodbye to your best friends, especially your first love. Because, for someone who didn’t have much worries in mind, that situation was the worst scenario. “I’m happy we have three more years together”

Unfortunately, three years were not enough for you. 1095 days were not enough to calm your heart that, despite any distance, friendships don’t end just because you don’t see each other every day. But the most important, three years were not enough for you and Hajime; not when being with him felt so right. 

His confession surprised you, especially on White’s Day during the first year at Aoba Johsai. After years giving him (and Tooru) chocolates, you would never expect Iwaizumi to give you a necklace while saying “I like you more than just friends, please go out with me”. All you did at that moment was laugh- and laugh hard. It was so Iwaizumi to confess like that, bluntly and straightforward; and you appreciated even more because you fell in love with him the way he was. 

“I can’t believe I’ll be the third wheel everytime we go out” Tooru whined after Iwaizumi and you told him about the new label the two of you would have. “Fortunately I have Makki and Mattsun to keep me company while you two get all lovey-dovey”

“Oikawa Tooru, I spent almost ten years of my life being the third wheel of you and Haji” that comment made them snort. “Do not complain about it because it’s most likely that you’ll have my boyfriend most of the time” 

“Lies! You’re our manager, the whole team will need to deal with you kissing Iwa-chan” Oikawa teased you and a part of you was getting annoyed, but the soft smile he gave you and your boyfriend told you otherwise. “Seriously, though, I’m so happy for you two”

Hajime squeezed your hand at his best friend’s comment, grinning down at you with a sparkle inside his eyes. You felt at peace: your feelings were mutuals, your best friend supported your new relationship and it was only the first year. Your state of bliss numbed your constant fear of changes, especially those brought by the end of cycles. 

And gosh, dating Iwaizumi Hajime was probably the best decision you’ve ever made in your teenage years. He still was the same boy as before, but gentle kisses, holding his hand and nights spent in each other’s embrace maximized all the already-perfect traits your boyfriend had. At the same time dating Iwa was new, it felt like you’ve been doing it for ages judging by how comfortable you were around each other. 

Falling in love with your best friend was probably the best decision you’ve ever made.

Every achievement felt a thousand times better when you could jump into Hajime’s arms, wrapping your legs around his waist as he spinned twice cheering loudly. There was no better way to celebrate a deserved win after a difficult match or a good grade on a difficult test.

“Haji, you did it!” those were the first words that would come out of your mouth after the referee signaled the end of the game and the boys cheered between themselves. The ace would always wear a big grin on his face as he catches you when you jump on him. “Oh my, I’m so proud of you and the boys” 

“How could I not make it when my personal cheerleader was giving her best on the side lines?” Iwaizumi teased kissing the corner of your mouth, your response was a light punch on his shoulder, but your eyes expressed all the love and proudness you were feeling. “Thank you for all your efforts as well, manager-chan”

“Hey, you two” Oikawa called off, interrupting the sweet moment between you and your boyfriend. “Keep PDA to minimal, we’re still on court. Iwa-chan, we have to bow to the stands, you can be all gross and touchy on the bus”

“Don’t give them ideas, Oikawa!” Makki complained kicking the setter, their antics made you laugh and tap on Hajime’s arms to put you down. “Don’t you dare do anything with us nearby, you perv”

“Of course not, dumbass” Iwaizumi barked, the tip of his ears burned in embarrassment. You watched your team thank the audience that supported them with a tiny smile on your face.

You’ve created beautiful memories in three years.

However, the same way all cycles have a beginning point, they also have their ends. And they were coming faster than you thought. You firstly noticed that after Aoba Johsai lost to Karasuno after a difficult match. 

It was the last chance to go to nationals with this team, in your last year at Seijoh, and the look on Iwaizumi and Oikawa’s faces shattered your heart. It was upsetting that you couldn’t do anything more than pat their backs and praise their efforts, because you knew it wouldn’t help ease the anger caused by a loss. The tears streaming down Hajime’s face showed the vulnerability you would only see at the comfort of your or his house.

“You guys did everything you could have done today” became a ritual for the team to listen to a speech from their managers, a straightforward and honest one before the coach treated them to a meal. “Remember this frustration to get better, okay? I’m proud of all of you”

Little by little all the club members started to head home, except the third years - including you - that went to the school’s gym. You were quick to understand the reason why you were there: because you would leave the club to focus on college exams. That meant another cycle was coming to an end, and you were not ready for that.

You weren’t ready to hear Oikawa thanking his teammates for the past years they’ve been playing together. You weren’t ready to see them fall apart in tears. You weren’t ready to hold Iwaizumi as he cried his heart out, sobbing hard on the crook of your neck as you smoothed your hand up and down his back. 

Just like you, they were not ready to say goodbye to all of these.

It felt like yesterday when you worried about which school you three would attend after Kitagawa Daiichi. The silly tears you shared in front of your best friends could not compare to the waterfall you’re shedding at the information Hajime just shared with you, during a late-night phone call.

“I made to a college in America” 

The air left your lungs and you swore if you were standing, your legs would definitely give in. Your chest tightened as your feelings divided in being extremely happy and proud of your boyfriend, and being… lost. To say you grew accustomed with Iwaizumi’s constant presence in your life was an understatement, after more than 10 years, you have never pictured your future that wouldn’t have him by your side. 

“That’s amazing, babe! Oh my god” you exhaled mesmerized. “I’m so happy for you! I knew you’d make it”

“I still can’t believe it” he answered quietly, the following silence deafened you and that made you worry. It had never disturbed you how quiet sometimes your calls could get, but today it felt different. “Y/n, what about us, though?”

“Haji…” more silence. The truth was that you didn’t know, neither did Iwaizumi. Throughout the unstable mess that life is you and Hajime were the constant variable, just like in Maths. No matter how things changed, how the scenarios shifted, you two were always there for each other. But now… the only steady thing in your life wouldn’t be there anymore right next to you. “We should… think about what we want, yeah?”

“You’re right” Iwaizumi breathed slowly, letting what you said settle down inside his head. “I love you, Y/n”

“I love you too, Hajime” and with that, the call ended, leaving you to drown in the sea of your thoughts.

Ever since you were a kid, changes scared you. No monster under your bed or inside your wardrobe could beat the terrible villain that walks side to side with the changes of life. Guess a few fears stick with us for good, you thought laughing humorlessly. 

It was a fact that Iwaizumi would never cheat on you, his loyalty was marvelous ever since he was six years old. And you knew for sure he would move mountains just to talk to you for a few minutes, like you’d do to him. Carrying a long-distance relationship with Hajime would be challenging, but no impossible, because he was him and you were you. And you loved each other so damn much. 

You spent weeks thinking about it every night - because during the days your thoughts were 100% focused on the boy standing right next to you. Time would eventually pass by and the moment he would leave Japan to start college in America would arrive, and you won’t be able to do anything to stop or delay it. So, after debating with yourself, you have made your final decision. 

Graduation was filled with joy and the inevitable tears shared in your group of friends. The fellow volleyball club members were there to congratulate the now former third years, wishing them luck for their future paths. Surprisingly or not, you managed to keep your tears at bay - maybe because you ran out of them on the last night after having a bounding time with Oikawa, Hajime, Matsukawa and Hanamaki. 

In a month or so, Oikawa would fly to Argentina to pursue his professional career as a volleyball player, Iwaizumi would have his brand new start in America, Makki and Mattsun would stay in Miyagi; and you would leave to start your new cycle. A cycle without Tooru and Hajime. 

“Hey” your boyfriend tugged lightly at your hand, motioning you to go to another place, a quieter one. You two walked in silence until you'd reached the stairs that led to the club room, sitting on the step next to each other. “It’s over”

“We graduated” both of you laughed, thinking about it three years ago felt so far away, like this future would never come. Yet, here you were, ready to face the world. “We had a great time here, even dealing with Tooru’s annoying ass will be a fond memory”

“I can’t believe we are all parting ways like this” Hajime admitted quietly, however his tone was filled with nostalgia. “I feel like it was yesterday that Shittykawa smacked your face with a volleyball”

“I think it’s the only occasion I’m glad I got hurt” you admitted lightly. “Because of that day, we could spend many more together”

The silence hugged you two nicely, you rested your head against Hajime’s shoulder as he hugged you by your sides. You wanted to save the feeling of being so close to him in your memory, in a place where it would never fade away even after years. His smell of cologne that was his mark filled your nose and you let yourself be intoxicated by it. 

“I guess it’s the end” he said in a whisper, rubbing your shoulders in circle motions. After thinking for many nights, the decision of breaking up with Iwaizumi felt right - although extremely painful. “Sometimes I regret choosing America”

“Don’t start with this bullshit again, Iwaizumi!” you scolded him, creating enough space between you so you could face him. “It’s your future, for god’s sake!”

“But I want you to be part of it” his eyes were a bit shiny, just like on the day you brought up the decision of ending the relationship. A stray tear rolled down his cheek and you quickly cupped his face to dry it with your thumb, the boy responding to your touch by leaning closer to your palm.

“Hajime, we’ve been best friends ever since forever, way before we fell in love with each other… I love you so much - and I’ll probably always do - but I can’t find peace within myself knowing that I’m holding you back. We will remain best friends for life, you are my first love and will always be… so, if there’s a red string tied up around our pinkies” you wrapped the said finger around his much larger one, a gentle smile appearing on your not wet cheeks. “Let fate bring us back together, whether as friends or lovers”

The boy leaned down to capture your lips, your mostly likely last kiss before splitting for good. You could taste the salty tears you two shed, but nothing could top the amazing sensation that was being so close to Hajime. Nothing could top the sensation of love and being loved by Iwaizumi Hajime. 

You feared changes, the numerous cycles scared you ever since you were a kid. But it was fine now, that you understood that it was necessary, though not permanent. If you and Iwaizumi Hajime were meant to be, fate will do its work to bring you back to where your heart belongs.

[lovecinnatwist]

Secret Santa for @Carxby

This Christmas I ended up writing a small drabble for my wonderful giftee Carxby. I’m a huge HaruMiha fan so I was so excited to get this prompt!

I hope you like this short little drabble!

Fandom: Ōkiku Furikabutte

Pairing: Haruna/Mihashi, Abe/Mihashi (one sided)

Rating: PG

Haruna doesn’t understand it- the tightness in his chest when he sees the two of them together. It takes time, something that he finds more of as he lies awake long after everyone else is sleeping. He stares up at his ceiling, blinking away racing thoughts and stirring feelings that are like a hurricane in his throat. A storm of words wants to get out, cold and harsh, threatening to flood all who stand in the splash zone. His body is aching from practice, his brain tired from a long day of lessons. Still somehow sleep can not find him. It goes on for weeks until self awareness slams into him like a truck.

Jealousy.

He remembers the casual way Takaya touches his new pitcher. It stirs something ugly inside of him. It’s casual, it’s friendly, it’s expected. After all, a battery is better when the two people are close. Not like how he and Takaya were, more like how he is with his new pitcher. The tall, gangly teen whose limbs look too long and awkward for his body. He looks at Takaya like he’s the moon and when Takaya looks at Mihashi, well it's like he sees stars.

The sheer awe in those huge hazel eyes is so clear that it’s sickening. Mihashi likes Takaya, more than just a pitcher and more than just a friend. No matter what Haruna tries to do to silence the little voice in his head, he can’t stop it from screaming in outrage. 

Well who could blame him for being possessive over the catcher he created? 

The next time he sees the blonde turn red under Takaya’s attention he knows to expect the rush of anger and jealousy. Being prepared helps and makes things easier. Well at least for a short while. Nishiura isn’t a team they run into often. They're more like passing ships really. Their games are far apart but not so much so that he has free time to go see them play. 

The next time he runs into Takaya there’s a girl across from him. They’re holding hands with their fingers laced together. Haruna waits for the familiar barrage of emotions. The hard punch to the gut which is envy, quickly followed by her twin, wrath.

Nothing happens.

He stares after their figures long after they’ve walked past him. Neither of the two spotting him from his position on the corner walk way. Takaya looks different, older, more mature. It’s only natural for him to find a girlfriend. For him to start a relationship. A feeling of unease swirls in his stomach and he thinks of strawberry blonde curls and an open honest smile. 

No longer able to hear their footsteps he heads in the opposite direction.

He isn’t looking for anything in particular. The air is crisp and clean and the sound of people enjoying the winter air is a perfect ambience for a day like this. The perfect backdrop for a date too. He wonders if the catcher is on his first one, or if this is one of many. He flexes his fingers in his pocket remembering the way Takaya had his hands locked with the girls. He himself has held hands before of course- but most girls complained. The roughness was attractive in theory but never later on actual dates. Did the catchers mitt keep Takaya hands soft and more pleasant?

He’s broken out of his thoughts by the sound of warbling in the distance. It’s demanding and loud enough to pull him out of his head and into the moment. Ahead he spots some poor guy being bullied by the ducks at the pond. The small little birds are quacking and chasing the guy until he’s scared enough to drop the bag of crumbs. He’s speeding up before he can help himself. The person falls to the ground and the ducks, distracted by their new bounty, do not pursue.

He doesn’t recognize him until they are mere feet away. 

Mihashi’s face is blotchy and red from unshed tears. His form trembles, probably from the scare the mother duck gave him. Haruna’s heart races. There’s a rush of- something that he can’t pin down. He should hang back and think, give himself a moment to understand the way his stomach is twisting into knots. He knows that he needs to. But his feet don’t seem to get the memo. He’s walking over to him before he can think better of it. 

When Mihashi finally notices him he turns and those breathtaking hazel green eyes are looking at him. Haruna’s heart leaps in his throat. His mouth goes dry with the amount of moisture heading to his palms. He’s stupidly speechless as he looks at the other pitcher in his winter clothes. The brown coat fits well with a belt that wraps tightly around the waist. His scarf looks soft to the touch much like the windswept locks that are sticking up every which way, his ear muffs do little to flatten them down. 

He swallows but the lump in his throat doesn’t go away. 

“ Ha-Haruna? “

He feels fixed into place. The sheer clearness of Mihashi’s gaze, even from a distance, is too much. He stands awkwardly, the sound of the ducks quacking gleefully at the other pitchers back is the only thing filling the silence. Haruna opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. He has nothing to say but turns out the younger boy does. 

“ Did- Did you run into Takaya? “

It’s a loaded question. At the mention of the catchers first name something ugly curls inside of him. He doesn’t know when the two got so close. Never before has he heard them be so casual with each other. He’s familiar enough with the jealousy to look outside of it and take in the pitchers expression and body language again. Suddenly Haruna has the feeling that the other’s tear damp eyes have nothing to do with the ducks at all. He doesn’t answer, at least not immediately. 

Mihashi doesn’t move to get up from the ground. He just waits and stares. Haruna finds it unnerving how much those eyes seem to search. 

Finally, reluctantly he shrugs. There’s no point in lying. 

“ Yea- I saw him. He looked busy though so I didn’t bother him. “

Mihashi doesn’t say anything, just looks away down at the ground. His figure seems to shrink on itself more than usual. The broken silhouette makes Haruna’s chest tighten. 

“ Where did you get the feed from?“

He doesn’t know where the thought comes from. He just can’t bear to see the other pitcher so defeated for another moment. It works, slightly- just enough to straighten his back and get his attention. Haruna averts his eyes suddenly feeling shy; Not that Mihashi notices of course. 

“ From the booth over there. “ He points a little too quickly and some of the few ducks picking about are quick to flap on the defensive. Haruna pushes forward to close the distance between them. He gets a firm grip on the pitcher’s jacket and hauls him up and away from the birds. They get closer and the tightness in his stomach bursts into flutters. 

He feels nauseous and sick at the same time. He stares into gorgeous hazel eyes. Then quickly becomes stressed when he realizes he’s used the word gorgeous to acknowledge them.

He suddenly takes notice of how cute the freckles that dust the pitchers nose and cheeks are. The way his in awe gapping expression leaves his pink lips parted and every time he blinks long eyelashes touch his cheeks and then his eyebrows. 

It’s a long time coming for him to realize that what he’s feeling is attraction. Not hot and possessive like he’s felt before, but softer, innocent and curious in many ways that he’s uncomfortable with. 

For some unknown reason- he likes this guy. 

Mihashi doesn’t say anything but a pink blush spreads on his face. He’s become more flustered by the moment, and Haruna in his new found awkwardness lets him go startled. They break eye contact quickly. Haruna tongue tied by his epiphany. 

“ So- Sorry “

Haruna has no clue why Mihashi is apologizing. If anything he should be the one to do so. That is if suddenly having feelings for a rival pitcher warrants an apology. He tries to play the entire thing off, which is difficult with the way Mihashi keeps sneaking these timid little glances his way. 

“S’cool. “

Before he can beat himself for his stupid answer Mihashi cuts him off. 

“ Do you want a bag of crumbs? “

Not really but he also isn’t quite ready to leave. He needs to talk to Mihashi a little bit more. It’s a rare opportunity and might be his only chance to decipher the quivering mess his emotions are becoming. 

“ Yea. Yea I do. “

The smile he gets from Mihashi makes his embarrassment more than worth it. Confidently, the pitcher leads him over to the booth where he willingly pays for two bags of feed. This time, when the two of them head back to the group of ducks no shenanigans take place. 

The birds seem to know better than to try to bully him like they did to Mihashi. 

Haruna snorts when the shorter pitcher hides behind him as the ducks draw closer. It takes time, several awkward attempts but soon Mihashi’s fear is swept away for active participation. He’s bold enough to stand shoulder to shoulder as he drops handfuls of feed for the ducks. All while making happy little laughs whenever they go for the food.

They bump shoulders. 

It’s a lot, more than he’s ready for. Complaints die on his lips though as he sees the other boy smile. 

He asks, despite a large part of him telling him not too.

“ Are you happy for him? “

He thinks he whispers it but the pitchers eyes snap to his immediately. Haruna’s breath hitches and his pulse races in his ears. A conflicted barrage passes over Mihashi’s face. His eyes darting about as they search for an answer. 

Haruna doesn’t want to hear it. He wishes he could take back the words. Why didn’t he heed his own intuition for once? His new, fragile affection is too vulnerable for the answer.

Loudly his ego roars in his ears. It would be better to know now then to be left wondering. To be left wanting someone who clearly likes someone else.

As both his intuition and ego war, Haruna gets his answer despite his unpreparedness. 

“ If Takaya is happy, I’m happy. “

It’s a messy answer but he can read between the lines enough to understand what he’s saying. However Haruna himself has always been a selfish person. He doesn’t know if he would have it within himself to be happy if Mihashi and Takaya got together. He rolls his shoulders back as a shiver goes down his spine.

It’s the first time he’s acknowledged these new feelings for what they are. The long developing signs of a crush. He pays a compliment before he can stop himself.

“ You’re a strong person. “

The pitcher's attention snaps to him so quickly he’s almost afraid Mihashi has hurt something. 

“ Me?”

The wonder in those hazel eyes is strong enough that Haruna feels like he’s burning. He’s pretty sure he’s red to his ears. Hopefully the other boy thinks it’s because of the weather and not because of anything else. 

He doesn’t follow up and just tosses more crumbs at the ducks. This time far enough that they race to the edge of the pond. They trip over each other and it’s a welcome distraction. 

The silence between them kind of puts Haruna on edge.

“ You’re a nice person Haruna. “

It’s not the first time he’s heard the pitcher say it. In fact he’s pretty sure compliments have always freely come from Mihahsi. This time however it sends a very real hum of happiness thrums through him. Probably because this isn’t a compliment from Nishiura’s pitcher- but from the guy he likes. 

His heart skips a beat at the thought. 

“ You’re a pretty good person too Mihashi. “

He’s riding so high on the compliment he almost misses the murmur that falls from Mihashi’s lips. He turns to look at him and finds his eyes to the ground. He’s so shy and cute Haruna wishes he could touch him. Instead he distracts himself with the crumbs. 

“ What? “

Mihashi squirms under the attention. 

“ R-Ren you can call me Ren. “

It shouldn't make him so happy. It shouldn’t make his heart soar. But it does and he’s so full that he might just say or do something embarrassing. He looks anywhere else but at this completely adorably awkward boy at his side. 

“ You can call me Motoki then. “

The protest that comes from the pitcher is equal parts cute and frustrating. Despite his resistance so far he can’t help grabbing him to stop the barrage of excuses. 

“ Miha- “ He has to stop to correct himself. “ I want you to Ren. “

Haruna is sure he’s going to remember the pretty color the other boy turns for the rest of his life. He doesn’t understand the noises he makes, nor his expression but when he gets the little nod. It feels like a win. 

He doesn’t realize he’s holding Mihashi’s hand until the younger boy looks down at their fingers. This time Haruna’s the one to blush. He immediately lets go and takes several steps back. Mihashi does a little half laugh that he quickly hides behind his crumb covered fingers.

It feels like… something. He can’t quite pin it down but the warmth in his chest spread through him and the cold winter day is a little less chilly. He can’t bring himself to look at Mihashi- no. Ren, he can’t bring himself to look at Ren. Mostly because he’s just so full of warmth he thinks it might spill out. It isn’t something he’s ready for or the other pitcher he’s sure. After all Ren for all of his kindness needs time to process his own feelings about Takaya. It’s something he himself can understand.

They stay at the pond long after their brown bags are empty and the ducks have swum off. They throw away their trash and make their separate ways all while Haruna avoids eye contact. He doesn’t get Ren’s phone number but he’s sure- later at a better time he will. 

He walks home alone and a hundred moments flicker through his head. Things he could have done, things he should have done and more than anything things that happened. He’s through his door when he realizes the familiar jealously hadn’t been directed at Mihashi but in fact at Takaya. 

He chuckles to himself and slides his gloves off. When his eyes catch the familiar groves and texture of his callouses he pauses. Ren’s hands are probably the same- if not rougher than his. A small shy smile plays across his lips. In fact, A fellow pitcher would probably think his hand feels pretty good.

[fusonzai]

I think I'm talking about confidence, I'm not too sure.

I was fifteen when I first saw Great Teacher Onizuka. My friend had lent me the DVD set (as you did when it was 2008) and I was about to spend the day watching it, feigning some illness to get out of school for the day. I needed some time alone, to process everything that had been going on around me.

For context, my parents were in the middle of a divorce. My mum, the most amazing person in the world to me, was not having a good time and I was not at all possessed with the skills to help her cope. Processing the concept of divorce, while trying to mediate the two adults going through it, wasn’t something I could handle. I didn’t know what I was doing. I needed a whole day away from friends and away from parents. While everyone was at their day job, I could think about everything and nothing, uninterrupted.

My attempt at getting out of school worked, however it came with a caveat. Mum had decided she’d take the day off with me. Feeling defeated but still stubborn, I insisted that if she was going to stay home too that we were watching GTO. I really had no idea what I was getting myself into.

GTO begins with our protagonist, Eikuchi Onizuka, squatting down by a payphone, trying to stare up the skirts of some high school girls coming down the nearby escalator. That’s a bold open. Two delinquents notice this and attempt to then extort him for cash. He promptly beats them up, forcing them to use all the money they have to buy him some food from the nearby convenience store. This scene establishes a few things straight off the bat: Onizuka is, first and foremost, a pervert and he’s physically strong but not to the point of unfairly asserting dominance over others. Onizuka dreams of being a teacher of all things. He wants to be the teacher he never had, being there for students outside the classroom as well as in. The series showcases Onizuka using his ex-biker gang leader skills and sheer determination to change the attitude of the antagonist students in his class. Each week he solves the reason behind their resistance toward him and they join his team until eventually he really is the Great Teacher, Onizuka.

The first delinquent problem Onizuka solves is that of Mizuki Nanako. Her parents aren’t divorced but they’re not exactly doing well. Ever since her father’s company started doing well and they moved into a mansion, she feels as though her parents just aren’t seeing eye to eye anymore. She blames it on a simple wall separating her parents’ private rooms. Before it got put up, her parents would talk and laugh together, sharing in their joys but also their defeats. Then before she knew it, they put a wall up and stopped sharing anything at all.

So, Onizuka arrives at her house. He’s got a bandana tied around his head, his abs gleaming as he’s smoking a cigarette. More importantly, he’s holding a sledgehammer, ready to demolish that wall. With her parents yelling at him threatening to call the police, Onizuka ascends the staircase and begins to take down that wall. Every powerful swing, shaking the wall and cracking the foundation.

(What a man what a man what a man what a might good man)

It felt cruel watching this scene with my mum. Here we were, two people still trying to process a big life event, opting to spend the day away from the problem. Here Onizuka was, just smashing through the problem with nothing but conviction, stupidity and sheer confidence. I couldn’t quite conceptualise the thought just yet but I think I envied that confidence. I wanted to be able to take a sledgehammer to this invisible problem and fix it. I didn’t know what an actual sledgehammer would solve nor was I even able to figure out what my situational sledgehammer would be, I just knew I wanted to be more like that. I wanted that confidence; I just didn’t know what it was yet.

Confidence. A complete assuredness in your actions. You may not have any idea of the outcome of said actions but you’re certain in the choice you made taking them. Maybe that’s just one definition. I struggle to this day with how to define confidence, I’ve been confident at different times in my life for different reasons. Mainly it’s been something I’ve found as I’ve gotten older though.

I struggled a lot with it when I was younger. I’d struggle to find it and when I did there was someone there trying to take it from me almost immediately. Pink polos were gay, skinny jeans were gay, being interested in anything outside the norm was gay as well. I wasn’t bullied by any means but there was always somebody around to tell you what they thought. I’d fold under that kind of pressure. I remember when I was 10 and we were in music class, I sang a little too loud and the popular girls behind me started pointing and laughing, clipping me before I got too sure of myself.

I got older and I thought I’d found confidence through weight training, but it was just arrogance. I genuinely thought I was better than other people in my creative writing class because I picked heavy things up and put them down. Of course, this had a drawback, whenever I’d meet someone bigger than me, I’d feel pathetic, jealous and inferior. I thought I’d rid myself of this arrogance when I started studying Japanese. My initial study was diligent and excessive. I’d have two Japanese classes a week and spend the rest of my time after work revising. Looking back now it was necessarily efficient studying, but in terms of time put in the hours were there. I believed I was working hard, which led to this arrogance in my abilities. An arrogance that was swiftly cut down whenever I met somebody better than me.

So, I always arrived at this juncture where I’d learn a new skill or hobby and wonder how to be confident in myself without comparing myself to others. I didn’t quite know how to praise myself for doing well at the gym or learning something new in Japanese without immediately comparing myself to others. It meant that I’d occasionally have these emotional highs when I achieved something only to be brought down to earth when I saw that somebody could do it better. I didn’t know how to make my achievements my own. The confidence I had was too fickle, it didn’t come from within and it often led to feeling superior to others based off of a single quantifier.

I was still uncomfortable with myself. I wanted outside validation which led to comparison, boasting and arrogance. I didn’t realise that I couldn’t get any of that from anyone else, it all had to come from within.

It’s taken me 14 years, but Onizuka finally made sense to me. I was watching the incredibly famous (in Japan) live action version of GTO one night, which turned into a nostalgia trip as all the episodes were almost identical to their anime equivalent. As I was watching I was wondering why I still hold this fictional character in such high regard, of all the powerful charismatic anime protagonists I watched in my teenage years, why does Onizuka persevere?

It’s because he’s kind of a dork.

(Get you a man that can do both)

Along with the confidence and strength that being a protagonist in a medium geared towards young boys affords you, Onizuka also has some very human flaws and vulnerabilities. The intense scenes like surprise renovating Nanako’s house or rescuing a whole bunch of kids from a gang are always juxtaposed with him being absolutely wayward in so many other aspects of life. He lives at the school because he can’t afford rent, he’s 26 and never had a girlfriend and his only friends are his students. We are always shown that his confidence isn’t intrinsically linked to how well his life is going, it’s just his feeling and determination in the moment. For all that bravado we see, we’re also shown the more human, relatable aspects. He’s amazing, brave and confident, but at the same time he’s still vulnerable and human.

Yet here’s the thing, I thought confidence meant a lack of vulnerability. I thought one couldn’t be both confident and vulnerable. This isn’t some segue into Boys Don’t Cry or a delve into masculinity. I didn’t believe that vulnerability wasn’t masculine, I just thought that vulnerability meant you had a long way to go before you were allowed to be confident.

(These lines go from bravado to insecurity in an instant, but I still think Tyler is confident as fuck)

I show what I feel to be the pretty vulnerable content on this blog. I write about my doubts and insecurities, the events that shaped me and the times in my life where I really felt at my lowest. I document the struggle I find myself in now, trying to carve something for myself and come to terms with the changes that keep happening around me. I don’t think anybody reading this would have an image of me as an outgoing, confident person. There’s rays of positivity sprinkled in occasionally but it’s generally content that I struggle to tell people in person.

Before starting this blog, I would have imagined that if I wanted to become this confident idealised version of myself, I’d need to erase any form of vulnerability. Delete the Instagram posts with moody lyrics, delete the couple shots and stop caring. I’d need to kill part of myself to become someone different. I couldn’t consciously accept that they were two signs of the same coin, even if I knew it in the back of my mind. The more I’ve been writing the better I’ve been feeling. These fears and insecurities being out in the open don’t make me any weaker, they actually feel like progress. My weaknesses will exist regardless of whether or not I tell people about them, my insecurities won’t disappear overnight. I’ll never be someone I’m not. What I can do is take these things that used to terrify me and put them out in the open. In my last piece I waxed on about making my words my own, by verbalising and bringing these thoughts into the open I feel like they become my own. They’re not completely stripped of power but they don’t hold the same sway over me that they once did.

So that leaves me with confidence. I can air my vulnerabilities and doubts but then where does my confidence come from? How do I then stop it from becoming arrogance?

Let me tell you about Charisma Man.

You know how when Superman goes back to Krypton he’s just a regular person, but on Earth he’s basically a God? Charisma Man is a joke (turned comic) about how Western Men often believe themselves to be Superman on Earth when they move to Japan. Why? You’re basically bombarded with compliments from the get-go. You get told your Japanese is amazing (when it’s not), that you’re so tall (when you’re short back home) and that you’re such a handsome man (when all experiences up until now have led you to believe the opposite). Thus, you create a kind of false confidence for yourself. Or do the people around you do it for you? You yourself haven’t changed but the people around you have, and they’re whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

(Honestly didn't know it was a comic, initially heard of it on a subreddit making fun of other expats in Japan)

Hell, maybe I am good looking? I studied Japanese for a year back home, maybe I am just really good at it? Maybe those people around me back home were just obnoxiously tall and mean. Maybe I am the shit. You begin to formulate this new identity for yourself. You are Charisma Man now. You’ll be making heaps of money, have girls on standby and be loved by everybody in no time.

Except that never happens.

The reality of Charisma Man isn’t so bright. You’re probably an English teacher living somewhere far away from the big city. Your apartment is probably small and old and your salary is half as much as you were making back home. Despite being told about how good your Japanese is, you still can’t turn on the TV and watch a program. You still can’t go to the bank and open an account with your bilingual Japanese friend. You’re still single and you’re probably getting fatter off convenience store fried chicken, if anything.

It’s fake confidence with no merit, built on nothing. You haven’t put yourself out there or done anything to earn that confidence so it always feels foreign to you. There isn’t some feat you perform or some hurdle you cross to get that kind of confidence. You’re not smashing walls with your sledgehammer or confronting your fears and growing. You just get fed compliments until your confidence balloon bursts.

I felt like I was Charisma Man for a hot minute. Separated from everyone I knew, out drinking every night, being complimented left right and centre. I kept trying and failing to keep my feet on the ground. Back then I thought it was new-found confidence, but I wasn’t really coming out of my shell; I was just being obnoxious. After long the facade faded and I realised I was the exact same Elliot I was back in Australia, just with less money and a nicer haircut.

I began to think about my experience. Why was I so confident? Why did it dissipate so quickly? Why was I not the only one that experienced this little phenomenon?

I came to the conclusion that confidence can come from many places. It can come from other people, but then it’s reliant on the praise of others. It’s shallow, fickle and bound to dissipate sooner rather than later. You’re constantly reliant on the praise of others to affirm who you are as a person, you can fool people into giving you praise but that goes away before you know it as well.

It’s a big enough of a struggle to understand yourself, it’s near impossible to understand strangers. Relying on such an unstable form of validation is essentially just inviting mental trauma in the long run.

On the other hand, confidence can also come from within.

After I distanced myself from all that charisma, I began to realise that I felt my best and my most confident when I actually put the work in. I started properly studying, eating well, and writing down my thoughts. It didn’t matter as much if people didn’t say anything, because I went to bed every night knowing that I put in enough work. Nobody said anything about the change, but I felt like I was becoming my own biggest supporter.

It’s both rewarding and daunting when you switch dopamine suppliers. I used past tense in those last few sentences because that particular fountain hasn’t been flowing so well lately. The flip side of not letting other people’s compliments fuel you anymore is that when you’re not doing right by yourself, that confidence tend to dry up pretty quickly.

[popculturebuffet]

House of Mouse review: “The Three Caballeros” or State of Your Outfit Donald

The Ride of the Three Caballeros continues, and with reviewed paid for up until legend, we’re fueled up and ready to ride on for some time now. This admittedly has taken a bit longer than I like to get back on the ride, due to a  number of reasons, but i’m back on the ride and these next two were both a pleasure to get to and cover a show that was LONG overdue to show up here: It’s the House of Mouse! For those of you who haven’t heard of it House of Mouse was a Disney show in 2000 that ran on it’s one Saturday morning block, the follow up to the Disney afternoon. It also holds a close place in my heart as these are the versions of Mickey and Co I grew up with, as I had Disney Channel as a kid and they reaired it a LOT, so the show is sorta soaked into my DNA, and is likely the reason why I like Donald and Goofy so much, as their shorts here and their personalities outside them really drew me in. I’ll still be objective mind, but the show means a lot to me and i’m not going to hide that. 

The show has a really amazing setup: Mickey and Co run a club for Disney characters. While no tv characters showed up, anyone who had been in the movies was fair game, and everyone from Hades to both forms of Simba somehow to the horned freaking king showed up. The only exceptions were as I said Tv characters, though Pepper Ann makes a cameo in the pilot, and the Pixar characters.. which is more fair than you think. Keep in mind at the time of this series, there were only three Pixar Movies: Toy Story, a Bug’s LIfe and Toy Story 2, which came out the same year as house of mouse. Not only that Pixar wasn’t owned by Disney at the time, so there was likely a fear they could loose the rights to use the characters at some point and thus didn’t want to chance it.  But yeah this setting is used for great jokes, it’s the source of the “No one does X like gaston!” meme and it’s funny every time they do that gag. Though the main stars of the show are still mickey and co with each having a fitting position in the club’s hierachy: MIckey and Donald, being equal stars, co-own the club, though Donald sometimes feels overshadowed. Mickey, with his people skills and cheer is the MC and host. Donald, given his jack of all trades nature and butt monkey status, is guest services, in charge of taking care of the club’s featured guests and naturally having it backfire, as well as sometimes envying Mickey’s spot and trying to take it over. Minnie, being level headed, keeps things running, planning the show and managing finaces as well as calming Mickey when he gets panicky. Daisy runs guest services while trying to break out on her own and is somewhat of a ditz in this series, though not overly dumb or incompetent, just a bit of an air head is all, and her sweet bubbly nature makes her very likeable. That and outside the shorts at least, she’s very nice to Donald here and their realtionship is very sweet, hence it being one of the four versions of it I like.  Goofy is head waiter, which fits him because.. I dunno they needed one. But he does the job well even if he naturally screws up a bunch because Goofy. Pluto is also around as a personal assitant because eh why not.  But what really stood out abotu the show to me, even more so as an adult, was  the supporting cast. As a kid, I was introduced to a lot of the disney side characters i’d never heard of before, all of whom get a decent amount of screen time over the series, while as an adult, I find it heartwarming they brought these characters back and fleshed them out after not being used on screen for so long, with one big exception that was still nice of them to use and helps bridge the generation gap. 

The rest of the HOM crew consisted of Hoarce, Mickey’s friend who was used a lot early on and who works as the club’s engineer and handyman, Clarabelle, also often forgotten but thoroughly defined here as a loveable gossip and acted wonderfully by the incomparable April Winchell. I credit this show for making me love both characters especially Clarabelle and wanting to see them more. 

We also have Gus, a far more obscure on screen character. Gus is Donald’s Cousin, and as of this writing is the ONLY one of Donald’s three majorly used Cousins to have not shown up in the Ducktales reboot. Gus is also the only one whose not a comics original, to my shock, instead showing up in the short “Donald’s Cousin Gus”, communicating only through honks and eating all of Donald’s food. He was naturally adapted for the comics, where while still having a huge appetite became more bossed with being a lazy while working with Grandma Duck, his and Donald’s Grandma. He’s so different between mediums I genuinely forgot he was in this show and didn’t realize he and the chef from this show were the same person. Still it’s nice to see him and hopefully he’ll make the reboot before it ends.  Finally rounding out the supporitng cast we have Huey Dewey and Louie, who mostly show up as the quackstreet boys to dance and are kind of inbetween their classic designs and their quack pack versions: They have the hair from quack pack, but seem more like their 12-13, a bit older than standard, but sitll not as old as they are in Quack Pack. They also don’t talk which is a vast improvement over Quack Pack. And finally, and more prominently, we have Max, who as I said bridges the gap between generations and I think was an amazing inclusion. He not only gave younger viewers like me a character they knew better, but allowed the character’s story to continue a bit, clearly taking place after xtreme but having him actually go on a date with Roxanne. Thank you House of Mouse Writers. your doing Golb’s work.  Antagonist wise we have Pete, as usual trying to muck things up and presumibly flush with post divorce cash. He’s the club landlord, and wants Mickey out for reasons that are never explained, but as long as the show goes on and Mickey pays rent on time, the show goes on. Being Pete, he naturally tries to sabotage things. It’s a good device. The other is Mortimer, probably the series deepest cut alongside Gus as he only shwoed up in one short but the series easily made him one of my faviorites: A Sleazy asshole who tries to pick up on Minnie (who thankfully this go round is not at all receiptve), tries to get on the card, and constnatly says Ha-Cha-Cha. Maurice LaMarche, this show had a REALLY talented voice cast can you tell?, really owned the character and has been his voice since and really took him from a one dimensional douche to a LOVEABLE asshole. 

Granted most of this.. really isn’t relevant as only the main cast show up, but it’s an aspect of the show I like so I went into it anyway. Plus i’ll defintely be coverng the show again so this saves me time for later.  Back on point though, the show’s format was a problem of the week, ranging from guest troubles to pete shenigans to internal strife in the club to just general sitcom shenanigans, going on at the club, with shorts inserted in from a previous Mickey Show, Mickey MouseWorks. MouseWorks was a short lived, pun intended, show that didn’t do so good, so they had a bunch of these shorts sitting around including some that never aired on the show, and thus inserted them as cartoons being played for the club patrons. It was a great device and the shorts, while varying in quality , are mostly pretty good and were the first Disney Shorts I saw. It was a good format, allowing the main stories to have plenty of time, but not have to overpad them or anything and with so many shorts on hand they could simply write the story to be as long as they needed and then insert however many shorts were needed. It worked well. 

So yeah as you can tell I truly love this show and it introduced a lot of stuff to me. And naturally.. that includes the Three Caballeros here, with their song here being stuck in my head for years and this being the first time they’d shown up in decades... which is ironically how long it took for me to see their movie but regardless. The boys were back, and you can see how the show did with them, under the cut. 

Something to note, No Disney Plus this time.. because BAFFLINGNLY the show is not on there, despite no rights issues holding it up I’m aware of, and the show having every other mouse and duck related animated series on there. I know, I’ve talked about this before, even in this very retrospective.. but I keep bringing it up because it’s something you easily forget about. Something that may slip away. But don’t let it. Let them know, and get our shows on there already. Christ.  Anyways, due to the show’s format of sliding the shorts in, and to make thing easier on me for house of mouse reviews i’m simply going to do the shorts first, then the main plot. Good? Good. 

This one only had two, though it varied on how many they used, and some were just super short shorts anyway, so it all balances out and as I said, i’ts better they just told as much story as was there than tried to rush it. So without further adue...

Donald’s Fish Fry: Poor Poor Humphrey  Yeah I didn’t like this one. The premise is using the old character Humphrey the Bear.. only here instead of being the antagonist the ranger present basically bullies the poor bear, while the other bears constnatly get more fish than him when it’s their registered time to fish. It’s just agrvating.. and when the poor boy finally GETS a fish, Donald snatches it.  Donald isn’t unsympathetic here, he found the fish fairly.. but it’s hard to tell who we’re supposed to root for here. Humphrey, who just wants what’s his, or Donald whose oblivious but technically in the wrong. This kind of slapstick just.. dosen’t work as well with both sides being sympathetic. It can work with say bugs and daffy, because both are equal, but there’s clearly an antagonistc force in elmer fudd. But this type of shenanigan just dosen’t work when neither side deserves the punishment, and Humphrey did nothing wrong. I felt like this for supporting him the whole time. 

And it ends with the ranger getting the fish. Because he wasn’t unlikeable enough clearly. Though Humphrey does get some beans so yay? Also the house segment after has Ranger Dickhead stealing Humphrey’s dinner, which given he’s at the club he CLEARLY paid for because it’s too fatty. Fuck you dude. I hope Goofy threw you out for that one. Just not a fun sit. I’ve seen this kind of shenanigan done better, in disney classic shorts even. I’ve seen Don as the villian better, See Trick or Treat for a good example> There’s just.. nothing here and it goes on forever. This is a good chunk of the episode! Lordy! Just a genuinely bad short. Thankfully the next one while not as word inducing is also not as headache inducing How to Be Smart: Now THESE were my faviorites as a kid. I loved goofy, so shorts about him were no brainer but even now.. these are still funny. Basically a narrator would follow Goofy around while he tries to learn how to do something, in this case how to get smarter after loosing on a gameshow .. and owing the show three milion dollars. There’s not much ot go into, it’s basically a series of jokes about Goofy going to school from elementary to college and learning his way up while Dealing with Ludvig’s bratty nephew and his own stupidity. It’s a funny short and really well done and these are easily some of the show’s best shorts and this is no exception. Unlike  the Humphrey short, where this essentially happened. 

My soul and I gladly enjoyed How to Be Smart. Dare to NOT be stupid and check this short out. 

The Wraparound: And I”m Donald Duck! As for the main segment it’s pretty good. We open with Mickey hyping up tonight’s act, which is naturally the Three Caballeros! But trouble sets in as Donald, while proud at first, is rightfully annoyed that a man on the street segment shows NO ONE remembers he was in the group. Including his best friend goofy. Only Pumba does, somehow. I dunno maybe he dated Panchito once before meating timon. Point is Donald dosen’t take this well, even if we get a nice moment of Daisy swooning over the fact.. even if being  HOM Daisy, she can’t get the name right. But given i’ve had trouble spelling it right, I’m one to talk. 

So being Donald he overreacts, which I like as.. well it’s Donald. Of course when given a very resonable reason to get upset he takes it a step too far. In this case he’s gotten an army of lawers, refuses to speak to mickey and has put ... THIS on. I showed it at the top of the page but.. well it bears repeating. 

It’s like every bad thing about the early 2000′s, from the douchey shades, to the rings, to the golden knuckles, to the hat that looks like a penis, to the no donald logo. There should be all the donalds, ALL OF THEM. He also has an army of lawyers, and naturally resorts to hot doggin and grandstanding: Signing autographs during the show, putting a giant poster of himself up. It works okay, as it makes him unsympathetic for the next part to work and is really funny which is the point. Even if again he looks like the feces that’s produced when shame eats too much stupidity. 

Instead of just getting Dale Gribble in there, Mickey is at a loss for a solution till the boys show up and.. it’s a mixed bag. Carlos  Alazraqui is excellent as Panchito, slipping into the roll well. Unlike last time the character showed up, they did NOT get a mexican actor, but Carols is still Latino, so it’s still better than what they did for Jose, and still big of them to actually bother to get a Latino actor to play a latino role.  Jose on the other hand.. is played, and not very good, by Rob Paulson. And before anyone throws stuff at me, I love Rob. I will  be gushing about him when I get around to reviewing the animaniacs reboot. He’s a god among voice actors and I love him. But his voice, at least in this ep dosen’t really .. FIT Jose, and he dosen’t really match the characters energy which is VERY weird given Animaniacs was right before this. The guy can DO energy and it’s one of his best talents. He STILL can as evidenced by both TMNT 2012 and the Animaniacs revival. It’s just not one of his better performances. I love the guy but even gods have off days.  And of course there’s the bigger issue of the very white Rob shouldn’t be playing the very Brazilian Jose. Not matching nationatlies is one thing, it sucks, but The Three Cablleros had a much bigger budget than HOM likely did. HOWEVER, it couldn’t of been that hard to find two latino voice actors in 2000, especially when you found at least one. I get this wasn’t as big a thing but when the 1940′s did better than you, you know you screwed up. 

But it probably dosen’t help the two.. barely do anything. Despite the episode being named after them, they only show up towards the end and just sorta say hi to mickey, get cool entrances, and then seeing Donald being a dick and Mickeya sking for their help, humble him with their musical number.  And the Musical Number IS really good, it’s been in my head for years and is just as catchy as the classic “Three Cabllero’s Song”.. why they didn’t sing that I don’t know, but this original one, a light knockoff of la bamba is still really fun and bouncy and the gags are good. It’s a really good climax and Donald deserves his punishment.  The only really issue is the ending, as.. no one leaned anything. No one acknowledges how forgotten Donald felt, Mickey dosen’t seem to get the issue as his “promoting Donald” at the end to make sure he’s not forgotten.. just has a bunch of jabs at his expense, and Donald dosen’t apologize..t hougH daisy is really sweet to him so we got some Donsy at least. It’s just a weak ending to an otherwise excellent wraparound.  Final Thoughts: This one was.. okay. Shorts aside, i’ve said my peace about them, the wraparound is a lot of fun, as is the musical number, even if the “artist formerly known as” joke was played out even in 2000. I mean yeas Prince changing his name to a symbol was insane, I get that.. but by then everyone had clowned on that decision and given he did so in a bizarre act of defiance towards his label, at a time where we now know how scummy record labels can be, it hasn’t aged well. It’s just the weak climax, song not included, really drags things down. The Cabs are just.. a cameo in their own damn episode, even with the full musical number and could’ve been around more. They don’t get to show off personalities or really do anything but teach Donald a lesson and are basically one indivdiual here. It sticks out even more because Rosa had both be utterly distinct and showed the utmost care while here.. their just sorta tossed in so they could have Donald be a primadona.. which itself is funny but on the whole this episode was just.. disappointing to revisit. It was disheartening to learn one of my favorite episodes as a kid wasn’t that good. It is worth checking out if you like Donald or the cabs, provided you skip the first short. Trust me, trust me, but is far from the best the house of mouse has to offer and hopefully the next one will show that.  Next time when the Ride continues, my gig at the house of mouse gets held over another night as Jose teaches Goofy manners and Panchito helps deprogram him from that. Before that I hope to get to the next chapter of life and times and some other stuff i’ve had hanging, including the next loud house and the next part of the tomtropsective, as well as some new things that have come up like said review of the animaniacs reboot and a review of Adventure Time: Distant Lands, Obsidan. Until then if you liked this review, please check out my other pages for more, follow me to see them, and if you’d like to comission your own, just hit me up in my ask box for my discord or personal message me here on tumblr. Until then, ther’es always another rainbow. I’m out. 

[gloves94]

To Be So Lonely [Draco Malfoy] 13

Rating: PG-13 Pairings: Draco Malfoy/OC Chapter warnings: Bullying! 

CHAPTER MASTERLIST MY MASTERLIST

"Is it true she hasn't spoken to anyone since?" "Yeah," one of the Slytherin third years said before twirling a knot of red spaghetti on his fork and spoon. "Even past her birthday."

"Didn't even go to the Quidditch match no matter how much Davis insisted."

"What does Nott say?" Another asked as he drank his pumpkin juice.

The boy speaking shrugged and let out an incoherent sound.

"I don't think she's said much to either. She's mostly been keeping to herself," Blaise whispered as the four Slytherin boys kept a close eye on the dark-haired girl that was quietly eating just a couple of seats away from them. "Do you think she's-" Crabbe began his voice on edge. "Plotting something?" Goyle finished for him. "She hasn't been taking any clients either."

"I'm sure that must be especially hard on you," Malfoy sneered at his goons nastily. To this day he wasn't really sure if either of them actually knew how to read or write. He did know that the two had been almost singlehandedly funding Nel's underground empire of illicit homework and class notes. At this point she must've amassed at least a small fortune; he couldn't help but wonder just what she was possibly saving it for. She certainly hadn’t splurged on that fancy quill back at Hogsmeade.

They all once again turned to look at her in an indiscrete fashion. Nel could feel their eyes on her. This irritated her to no end. She fought the urge to tell them to take a picture or go flog themselves. It was then that their gazes shifted when they saw no other than Harry Potter turning around from the Gryffindor table. They all shot daggers at him.

"Hey," Harry greeted. She raised her head and looked at him with a dead expression on her face before taking a bite from a bread roll.

The humiliation from last week's incident wasn't what was keeping Elowen in an emotionally shut down mode. There were more than a handful of problems in Nel Saintday's hands at the moment that had seniority over whatever bullying the other Slytherins had done to her. She still couldn’t summon a Patronus or even think of one particularly joyous memory to use with the charm. The many Dementors in the area were beginning to become a problem once knocking her out on way to Herbology class. Not to mention Professor Snape’s “emotional control lessons” we’re going terrible. Also, what did he know about controlling his emotions to begin with? As far as anybody knew Professor Snape was a heartless, fowl nosed, prick.

Worst of all was that she still didn’t know who had dropped her off at the abbey. She doubted if Malfoy had even known from the start. She felt foolish for even thinking he could’ve been a friend to her. She tried not to remember how nice he had been that day at Hogsmeade or how lovely his music was. Just like her Patronus, this memory had been corrupted too, it wasn’t real.  

It wasn’t him.

“Did you hear that Professor Lupin is back?” Harry asked attempting to start a conversation. She said nothing in return and stared at him with a blank expression.

“I’ll see you tonight then?” He asked. She was quiet for a moment before speaking. “Harry,” her voice was hoarse at first. “What if I can’t summon a Patronus?” Her eyes filled with pain as she asked the question which had been burdening her.

The Slytherin boys kept a close eye in the Gryffindor as he turned and instead took a seat before her in the Slytherin table.

Draco couldn’t help but glare daggers at Harry.

Saint Potter.

So perfect.

So opportunistic.

Always so damn polite.

Can’t help but gloat his goodness.

All Potter wanted was a show, why else would he have actually dared to sit in the Slytherin table?  He wanted to be taught a lesson. He had to be asking for it. Malfoy was so sick of him. He seemed to be unescapable. He hated how much Potter was worshiped at school. How he couldn’t even escape him at home where his father seemed to be just as intrigued with Scarhead’s life; always probing questions about him and not his own son. It was the same thing with Saintday. He had never figured out why his father seemed to be so fascinated with the orphan girl. Why he spoke to her so respectfully almost as if he had some cold veneration towards her. Both Saintday and Potter were the same, they were names that were probably more familiar to his father’s tongue than Draco’s own name. Malfoy looked at the hopeful smile on Potter’s face as he interacted with Saintday. How dully typical of Potter acting in charity towards the most vulnerable members of the school.

Nel on the other hand…

His eyes shifted to the sad look in her eyes. He hadn’t meant to hurt her like that. He hadn’t meant for Zabini and the others to find out about their trip to Hogsmeade. That trip was something that was supposed to be his and only his.

He hated to think about that one Christmas Eve night the two had spent together last year. It had been his first Christmas away from home and from his family. The Ministry was running raids at the time seeking for cursed artifacts relating to the Dark Arts and You-Know-Who. Artifacts he knew were hidden home. One wrong move, a misplaced book, wand or item and his family would lose everything. His father would go to jail. Their name would be stained with disgrace. What would happen to his mother?  

He had written to his father that day concerned about his well-being and instead received a scolding Howler in return instructing him to shut up, not write home, and keep a close eye on the happenings involving the Chamber of Secrets. There had been no Happy Christmas wishes or loving expressed concerns for his son. He had been miserable that night. He had even cried in the second-floor girl’s bathroom where he knew nobody would see or hear him.

He still remembered the blank expression on her face when she approached him in the Slytherin Common room that night. He had seen her with the Weasley twins earlier. Two people who Malfoy thought were actually really funny although he would never publicly admit it.

There was no way he could’ve hidden his swollen red face from her. She had to have known he had been crying that night.

"Lost something Slugbreath?" He had insulted defensively hoping she’d go away before she laughed or mocked him.

"Are you okay?"

Nobody had ever asked him that simple question before. Not his friends, not his father, not a single professor least of all his family. Proper composure was simply something that was expected of him, emotional nonsense was absolutely unacceptable in the Malfoy household. It was seen as an unnecessary weakness.  

She didn’t have to stop and nosey in on his well-being. She didn’t have to drag him to the servant-quarters, feed him that disgusting looking sandwich that was warm tasted like Christmas and keep him company from his loneliness. This uncommon kindness was rare to him. Maybe some of the other Slytherin girls would’ve asked if he was okay. Maybe Parkinson would’ve attempted to snog him, but none would’ve kept him company like she did. He knew he certainly wouldn’t have done the same and least of all for her.

Like Potter, Saintday was an orphan. Something he partially envied. Both weren’t chain-balled to a golden name with high expectations and standards to maintain and live up to. Expectations that had been set for him from the moment of his birth into a life of privilege. As the sole heir of the Malfoy name, Draco had a lot to live up to. His friendships had to be well rounded with other members of the Sacred Twenty-Eight Pureblood families in England no matter how despicable or dull this company was. He had to be the best in class, Quidditch Team, socially agreeable, he was certain that in the future he’d even have to marry a Pureblooded witch. These expectations confined him since his infancy and allowed no room for second guessing or mistakes.

What would Potter ever know about that? Or even Elowen.

He hadn’t expected for the Three Broomsticks to blow up. For her to set him and Blaise on fire. He wasn’t even aware Elowen had those kinds of problems.

He wanted to be friends with her. Her pranks were funny, and she had been nice to him. Not to mention bloody brilliant at Charms. But how could the two of them ever be friends? How? What would his family think? His father had that morbid fascination for her. But his mother? His mother was the most important person in his life, and he was certain she’d be more than disappointed in him if he decided to willingly keep that type of company around.

Elowen would never fit in to his world.

Born with no name, no blood right, dressed in rags, possessing atrocious manners and an infamously ill temperament. The thought of having her for dinner with his family… It would be a catastrophe. He had no doubt plates would be thrown and something would probably explode.

He had long decided it was best to stay away from her.

The words left his mouth before he even realized.

“Come have lunch with your girlfriend Potter?” He butted loudly.

Neither acknowledged him. Regardless, the other Slytherins laughed at his comment. This only made Draco more determined to get under their skins.

"I can understand having your dog Weasley as your beating man, but isn’t it pathetic making your girlfriend fight your fights for you Potter?" He said referencing what had happened in Care for Magical Creatures the other day.

Last time Nel had met with Lupin he had advised her to try and see the best in people. Even in the worst ones. He had advised to try to be empathetic and think about what the other person could be going through. She guessed he felt that if she saw the world in a more positive light it might help come up with a Patronus worthy memory. However, when she thought of Malfoy… All she could see was a smug, spoiled thirteen-year-old. The boy had literally had everything and more in the world. He had absolutely no reason or excuse to act like such an arse all the time. In her eyes this made him disgusting.

“Sodd off Malfoy,” Harry shot him a glare before turning his attention to his friend.

“Wish you could’ve been at Hogsmeade Potter. The trip was a blast!” He said mockingly inferring to the explosion. Nel stiffened at the mentioning of Hogsmeade. Of course, Harry knew what Malfoy was referring too. Hell, the whole school knew.

Harry was about to retort something clever but instead Nel’s wand beat him to it. That had been more than enough empathetic thinking for the day. The noodles in each of their plates came to life and leeched over the Slytherin boys’ heads pulling them down suffocating them in a plate with sauce and meatballs. She didn’t stick around to wait and see their reactions leaving just as fast.

“I’m sorry about them,” Harry apologized as he jogged outside of the Great Hall to catch up to his friend.

“Why should you be? It’s not your fault they were dropped on their heads when they were born.”

Harry would’ve laughed if her expression wasn’t so sullen.

“I don't think I have a memory strong enough to cast a Patronus,” she admitted regrettably.

“There has to be something, Nel,” he insisted positively. It had also been hard for Harry to summon a charm of his own. “But like Professor Lupin said, we have to be positive.”

Professor Lupin had said a lot of things… “Maybe there is…” She spoke half-heartedly. “But bad things have happened to the people in them. They’ve all left my life. The root of the memory itself might be good, but by association it has become bitter.” Almost as if a mist of fear and abonnement corrupted and poisoned her Patronus.

“Why don't we go make some memories then?” Harry suggested optimistically with a friendly smile. She eyed him cautiously. Her nature of being doubtful and wary of other people’s kind gestures almost made her think it was probably some kind of trick.

“Sure,” She said after a moment of hesitation. Afterall what was the worst thing that could happen?

The two decided to go and play with some Gobstones in the courtyard before going to Lupin’s and it was actually a pleasant time.

“Don’t get frustrated,” Lupin said to her as she failed to summon a Patronus yet again. “Be patient.”

“Be good. Make good memories,” he kindly reassured her with a small smile before giving her a chocolate bar.

Part of her felt that the professor was slowly conditioning her to like him with the chocolate bars he gave her. He was also unusually kind. He almost seemed to genuinely care about her and Harry unlike most of the other professors. She hated to admit it, but it was working, he was starting to grow on her.

Nel was more than frustrated still at-least now she was able to stop herself before she released that ominous corrupted orb that seemed to emit from her Patronus.

Harry couldn’t summon one which was refreshing considering everything seemed to come easy to him.

Lupin’s lessons had been slowly progressing at the pace of a snail. Snape’s were practically advancing at the same pace.

“I told you Saintday to empty yourself of emotion! Fools who wear their hearts proudly on their sleeves, who cannot control their emotions, who wallow in sad memories and allow themselves to be provoked this easily — weak people, in other words — they stand no chance!” Snape instructed pointing his wand at her face from across his crowded office.

“Why do I have to do this?” She rasped as she looked at him with a wounded expression.

The Potions Master had been attempting to pry into her mind in order to agitate her explosive emotions. She found it disturbing allowing him to witness all of the terrible things she had endured throughout her life. Maybe this was an emotional control training but Nel almost felt as if it was more as if he was almost preparing her for something bigger. It almost seemed personal to him.

“Next time you go off like a firecracker somebody could die because of your infantile emotions. You must tame yourself! Empty yourself or emotion. Do not allow me to penetrate your mind with such absurd ease.”

“Please… stop,” she pleaded lowering her head as she sank deeper into the uncomfortable desk chair that was across from him. Sweat stains stained her clothes as she attempted to compose herself. "Brace yourself." He warned.

It was then that she felt him enter her mind again. She winced as he witnessed all of her most vulnerable moments. Good days at the orphanage with Lucy, being locked in and crying and banging on the door of the laundry room to get out, cheering for Tracey at the Quidditch try outs, consoling her when she didn’t make it for the second year in a row, Malfoy tapping her shoulder making me turn around in the middle of Astronomy and pretending he wasn’t the one doing it. Hexing some Hufflepuffs that were bullying Bullstrode during dinner, the time Parkinson made her barf slugs in the middle of the Common Room.  

“Make me stop!” She could hear Snape’s voice in her head.

The vials I’m the room rattled threatening to explode before she let out a throaty scream as she for the first time managed to successfully slam the door of her thoughts on him. She was exhausted, completely drained, cold sweat beads sliding down her temple as she caught her breath.

“Sir… this is unhealthy… I’ll be good. I promise,” she begged him to stop these torturous lessons.

“If this will keep you from blowing up yourself and the school it’ll be worth it. You did well, some progress for once.”

Snape raised his wand and pointed it straight in between her eyes. It might’ve been some progress, but it was not enough for him. He had to do his best in teaching her how to close her mind from others. She had to be at least good enough to keep You-Know-Who-Out…

“Again.”

Xxxxx

“Hey Saintday heard you-“ Pansy’s shrill commanding voice was interrupted when a yellow potion vial was thrown across the room and cracked open against her black bed post.

“Shut your beak Parkinson,” Nel said mindlessly not removing her eyes from the beanie she was attempting to knit. No matter how much she knit she was never very good at it. Maybe it was because she was usually distracted or trying to multitask which lead to most of her crafts having gaping holes or being wavy and uneven on the sides.

She didn’t even enjoy Pansy’s transformation into a large yellow canary.

“Will you two stop it?” Daphne snapped at the two girls looking up from a canvas she was currently painting on. “It is so annoying to see you two fight over the pettiest of things!” She huffed exasperated.

“You’re too sensitive,” Millicent said to Greengrass before helping the giant canary to Madame Pomfrey’s.

“Thanks Daph,” Tracey shot her a lopsided smile as she leafed through a Quidditch magazine.

“Can’t even concentrate with these two in the room,” she shot Nel a look before returning to her painting. The girl smirked slightly in her direction.

Like the past two years before, Elowen was to spend the Winter break and Christmas in the castle. She was hoping this would mean no more emotional control lessons with Professor Snape but boy was she wrong. Snape had instead cited her into his office every day to torture her with these painful lessons. He almost seemed to have an urgency in her mastering the subject. In her time with him she felt almost some empathy towards the older man. Why was he so bitter? Why was he so alone that he had nothing better to do but to educate her over the Christmas holiday? Maybe his loneliness had caused him to be this way.

It seemed like the only people that were staying over the break that Nel knew of were Harry and his friends.

Having a terrible headache and overall just being drained from working on her lessons all night Nel stayed in the Slytherin Common Room Christmas Eve. Loneliness had grown to be her only company. The dim green lights of the dormitory were soothing. It was unusually quiet, almost peaceful. That night Nel stayed up all night knitting one extra pair of black hand gloves. She later ventured into the kitchens to help herself to a Christmas leftover sandwhich.

The next morning, she awoke not expecting more than two Christmas gifts instead under the tree but instead there were a handful lot. Some chocolates from Professor Lupin, a chocolate frog from Harry, “The Tales of Beadle the Bard” from Theodore and a Quidditch t-shirt from Tracey's favorite team. Something Nel suspected she'd borrow often. Under the Christmas tree at the very end there was a small black box. No tag. It simply had her name written on it. She pulled the string that held it together and opened it to reveal the fancy black feathered quill she had been eyeing back at the shop in Hogsmeade. It came with a pack of violet ink and some parchment.

There was no way.

She eyed the quill curiously wondering if it was cursed.

There was only one other person that knew she had wanted this specific quill set. Nobody else knew. She hadn't mentioned it to another soul, but there was no absolute way. There was no way in hellMalfoy had bothered to gift her something so thoughtful. Again, she wondered if it was from Professor Snape. Considering he had actually been inside of her head. This was just like the sweater from last year.

Later that same day Nel arrived to Professor Snape’s office ready for her lessons. She’d ask him if he had been the mysterious character behind this year’s quill and last year’s fine sweater.

Snape didn’t look or act as if it was Christmas day. He was dressed in his classic noir fashion hovering over some parchments he was grading. Nel couldn’t help but wonder if her professor did anything for Christmas or if he even received any gifts. Did he have parents? Or was he an orphan like her too?

“Professor, sir,” Nel stood before his desk rolling her weight on the balls of her feet. She held the humble gift behind her back. Slowly he raised his head simply acknowledging her.

"Happy Christmas, Professor, I made these for you," She offered the gift to him. He looked at the knitted material in her hands. Standing up he rounded around his desk and took them from her hands hesitation. Snape looked down at the knitted gloves he was holding and clutched them tightly. It was probably the worst gift he had ever received. They had many small holes and he was sure the finger spaces were too short on some odd ones. She might as well have given him a lump of trash.

The professor said nothing, he turned around and placed the ugly gloves on the desk and turned his back to her. Nel looked at the back of his dark head oddly. Did he hate them? She knew she wasn't the best knitter but a thank you would've been appreciated…

"It…" He grumbled, his voice sounding loud and heavy in the silence that the two shared. "It may not have escaped your notice Saintday, but life isn't fair." He spoke ominously.

She blinked twice confused by his words. “Sir?” Snape always knew more than he was letting on. Specially about Elowen Saintday… It hadn't been a coincidence that Dumbledore had asked him to escort her to Diagon Alley when she was first introduced to the Wizarding World. He had connected the dots and knew it wasn't a coincidence that her wand was composed of omens of death, that she could see Therstals, that she could speak to snakes. He knew what was to come and what would be expected of the girl and he was sure he hadn’t been the only one who had connected the dots. "Get out," he said quietly his fingers pressing into the edges of his desk.

She looked at him with innocent concern. "Professor Snape?" She prodded sounding almost concerned.

"Get out!" He roared in a dangerous tone that made the girl flinch and scrambled out of the room. It was almost as if her small gestured had triggered something in the man. She closed the door behind her and looked at the closed wooden door. Half of her was expecting to hear violent crashing noises but instead there was only silence. She made a mental note never to gift Professor Snape anything ever again in her life. Specially gloves. Maybe Snape really was beyond reason. As she stood outside, she heard loud cackling. Looking up she saw Peeves translucent body levitating above her carrying buckets that seemed to swoosh with a dark foul smelling liquid. Smirking, having nothing better to do, she decided to follow after the poltergeist she felt a perverse fondness for.

Xxx

A couple of weeks later the school term resumed and the Slytherin girl was happy to see her friends. She was also happy to know that most of their knitted gifts had turned out alright and fit their heads well. Tracey specially loved her since hers had been made with the yellow and blue colors of the Puddlemere United.

Of course, that meant that her main tormentor was back. She suspected Malfoy had given her the quill she was using in class yet said nothing to him. She didn’t have enough evidence and the thought was offsetting enough it. Besides, next time the coward should put his name on the tag. She didn’t know why he had decided he was in a mood in the middle of History of Magic. He had been passing notes to her in the middle of class. She never bothered opening of reading. However, as the class passed by and she refused to give him an ounce of attention his teasing evolved from note passing to throwing balled up parchments to the back of her head and eventually tapping her shoulder and pulling her hair.

“You did your hair different today Saintday, any particular reason why?” He leaned across his desk and whispered. Of course, he had noticed that today she was wearing her medium length hair on a low ponytail over her shoulder.

“So, you won’t pull at it you entitled prick,” she retorted through gritted teeth shooting him a nasty glare her patience growing from thin to nonexistent.

You’d think Professor Binns would notice the two students bickering in the back of the class. Even Granger shot them a look to quiet down since they were disturbing her learning. At some point during the class Nel became so fed up she turned and casted a bat-boogey hex on Malfoy which made monstrously green bats made out of mucus painfully fly out of his nose. The students in the room roared with laughter at the painful sight.

“Merlin, you’re unbearable Saintday!” he managed to speak in a nasal voice both of his hands were attempting to cover his nose.

Served him well for being a snotty prick. Whatever it was Malfoy had been planning on snapping with she wasn’t expecting what he said next.

“This is why your parents didn’t want you!”

His words were sharp and dropped making the room immediately grow silent. You could hear a pin drop as the laughter in the room ceased. The only voice in the background being Binns dull lecturing about who-even-cares what. Even the Slytherins sitting around him looked at him struck by the cruel comment. The only person laughing was Pansy Parkinson. Nel visibly recoiled at his spiteful words.

He had struck a low nerve.

Just in cue class was dismissed and she quickly exited the room before the tears could begin to sting her eyes.

Draco watched her back as she left the room before anybody could say or do anything for her. It was then that he felt someone shove him.

“What is your problem?” He was surprised to see Theodore Nott out of all people aggressively shove at him. “She has feelings you fucking arse.” He glowered at him, a chilly green-eyed glare before stalking off after his friend. Tracey shook her head and followed after him looking almost disturbed.

Even Blaise looked at Malfoy with uneasiness. Maybe he had crossed the line this time…

“Don’t pay any attention to Nott,” Pansy snorted as she reached Malfoy’s side. “You know he chases after her like some sort of lovesick puppy. I thought it was brilliant!” she said giddily before hugging his arm.

Daphne shook her head lightly and left. Millicent and Goyle exchange a look in the background.

Moments later Nel was exiting the Slytherin dormitory walking towards Lupin’s office to prepare herself for her evening lesson with him and Harry. Malfoy’s words still stirring in the back of her head. It was every orphan’s worst thought being unwanted. The two people who were supposed to unconditionally love and care for you – even they didn’t want you. It made her terrible fear of abandonment more real.

“Oi,” She heard the one voice she did not want to hear. “Saintday!”

She didn’t turn around. Instead she gripped her wand inside of her cloak’s pocket tighter and walked faster ignoring the person calling after her. She didn’t react until she felt a hand come down her shoulder. “Dupulso!” She casted spinning on her heel.

Malfoy staggered and fell on his bottom from the impact of her spell.

“Elowen,” he managed to speak sorely before struggling back to his feet. She looked at him with distaste and wariness.

“Stay away from me!” She shouted at him cross once again before turning away. Regardless he persisted once again reaching for her arm.

“Don’t listen to a word I say,” he insisted.

He was conflicted. He hated himself for saying what he had said. The cruel words came out before he had even realized, but he was embarrassed, frustrated and beyond irritated. She wouldn’t even look his way; wouldn’t even read the notes he had been passing her way. Didn’t even realize he had been the one to gift her the quill set she was using.

She whipped her arm away from his touch and pointed directly at the wall behind him. “Confrigo!” She casted purposely exploding a brick in the wall which created a small cavity on it. Malfoy ducked and covered his head looking at her with a shocked expression.

“Next time I won’t miss,” She threatened before turning around for the third time.

“Saintday,” again he attempted to reach her.

“Flipendo,” She was fast in her casting and with that the boy was thrown against the opposite wall of the corridor where he painfully crashed and then pitifully slid down to the floor.

Her back was already to him as she continued in her trek. He didn’t have time. Especially when she wasn’t going to stick around and listen. Specailly not after he had behaved like an arse. “I want to tell you who it was.” He said loudly trying to get her to turn around and listen to him. “I don’t want to hear it or anything that comes out of your filthy mouth Malfoy!” She screamed. She turned and glared. “Never speak to me again,” she threatened.

“I didn’t lie to you,” He attempted to bargain for her time, for her attention. “No,” She agreed. “But you lied to everybody else!” She pressed on her threatening tone getting closer. “You made me look like an idiot- and you know what? I’m glad I blew up the Three Broomsticks. And I am especially glad I set you on fire. I hope it hurt!” She spat sounding hurt. “And then today-“ She thought of what he had said to her. It had been so childish, so unnecessary. He saw her lower lip tremble before she swiftly turned in the opposite direction.

Nott’s words echoed in Draco’s head.

“She has feelings you fucking arse.”

It was probably the first time he had ever witnesses such a strong vulnerable emotion on her features. But how could he even apologize or even begin to explain to her why he felt the need to be such a complete jackass all the time? “I want to be friends,” he blurted. He eyed her fearfully dreading for the expected rejection to come.

She gave him a sour look before beginning to laugh at his words in disbelief. Okay. Maybe he did deserve that. “You sure have a funny way of showing it.”

“Elowen,” he pleaded in a hurt voice.

“No,” She spat in a cross tone pointing her wand at his face dangerously close. “You will NOTcall me by my name. You are NOT my friend. I don’t want to ever hear my name come out of that disgusting mouth of yours!”

“Will you please listen to me?” He insisted getting closer.

She was ready to hex him. When her wand flew out of her hand.

“Not my Draco!” An unbearably familiar voice butted between the two of them. They both turned to see Pansy who was walking in the opposite direction of them. Neither had heard her enter the dungeon or even cast the Expeliarmus.

“Have your girlfriend to fight your fights for you Malfoy?” She seethed in the anger that was beginning to boil in the pits of her stomach. Tossing an insult he had once tossed at Harry. Nel wanted to hurt them both. Especially Parkinson, but she couldn’t. She let out a low breath as she attempted to rid herself of these impulsive emotions just like Snape had taught her. What reason did Parkinson have to be so vile? Raw insecurity maybe? Who knows?

To her surprise Elowen actually gained control of her emotions. She calmly turned to face Parkinson and simply glared before her head began to swell into a balloon. She cried out and Bullstrode began escorting her to Madame Pomfrey’s.

Malfoy had her want in his hand and handed it to her. She snatched it out of his hand and shot him a dirty look before finally leaving.

Xxxxx

Throughout the rest of the year Malfoy continued wanting to want to talk to her, but at this point Nel was completely disinterested in anything he had to say. Specially about whomever had abandoned her at the abbey. As he had said whoever had done this didn’t want her so why should she want them?

His bipolar personality in which he would be nice to her one moment and then terribly rude the next, especially when the other Slytherin boys were around, didn’t help his case.

She wanted to plan and execute her terrible revenge, but Lupin had advised her no to. He was right, no matter what she did or didn’t do they wouldn’t stop. Her vengeance would be terribly sweet, but it wouldn’t make things right. Oh, but how long she longed to watch them suffer- She was learning to try something new, she was learning empathy, she was trying to understand why they were the way they were- However, today would not be the day. After all learning was a long process.

Nel sat in the Slytherin Common Room waiting for the Slytherin boys’ rude awakening. Moments later rivers of large toads and frogs came sliding down the staircase. They were big, small, some were green, and others were murky brown. They croaked and jumped to the carpet. Moments later Crabbe came running down pulling frogs out of his pants. The girl’s in the Common Room shrieked at the yucky grossness glaring in disgust. Blaise Zabini threw up. Malfoy walked down with a large frog on his blonde head as he descended down the stairs. It seemed like he had given up on getting the frogs out of his robes.

Theodore looked beyond irritated. Sadly he had been collateral damage.

She said nothing to them that morning but would often smugly ribbit at them and swell her cheeks when things were awfully quiet in the middle of class or in the common room. It had been weeks and the staff hadn’t figured out how to disenchant the plumping from pouring out amphibians instead of water. She had a feeling that Lupin knew but he didn’t have any proof.

That had been a couple of weeks ago.

Presently, Nel was in the back of the library doing some research about the history of the Patronus charm when somebody slid into the chair in front of her. She wasn’t taking any clients at the moment and with the year ending people were beginning to grow desperate for her services. She raised her wand ready to attack whomever disturbed but instead she found she couldn’t move her hand. A hand slapped over hers and pinned it against the desk roughly. Her eyes snapped up from the text she was reading to meet a pair of grey ones.  

“Will you quit being a knob head and listen to me for a second?”

It was Malfoy and he looked angry.

She didn’t know if he was angry  because of the frogs that had been coming out of his enchanted bathroom for weeks or his frustration of being unable to communicate with her.

“Which one of your personalities do you want me to listen to? The one that’s an insufferable arsehole or the one that’s an arrogant son of a witch?” She challenged with a nasty look.

“Can you get your head of your arse for a moment,” he asked gruffly. He had been trying to have a conversation with her for months now and every time he got close he would get either embarrassingly hexed or tossed against a nearby wall. “Can you?” She shot back and pulled her hand back from his hand grip standing up and gathering her belongings.

“Elowen, please.”

That was it. He was on her last nerve. Sodd emotional control classes with Snape. She had been more than clear with him stating she didn’t want him near her.

“Stop calling me by my name Malfoy. Stop calling me at all! I already told you!” She slammed her books on the table angrily. “You are vile, and despicable and like to humiliate others because you are so small and insignificant it makes you feel better about your sad and pitiful life! You think you’re all that because you can trace your family back a couple of generations. Big deal! Whoop-de-doo. Congratulations. But guess what? Nobody cares you freakishly albino inbreed!”

She snapped angrily almost spitting fire in his direction. Malfoy was stunned, he had never seen such an angry look in her eyes, her neck so red from the word vomit she had just hatefully spewed at him. He thought she was going to stop there but she didn’t. “Your head is so damn big I sometimes wonder if it’s so swelled up because of your massive ego or because it is filled with air! Yeah- maybe you do have a fancy name and more money than I will ever have, but what’s the use of it if it can’t buy you any manners.”

Nel caught her breath and leaned her weight on the desk. Her shoulders slumped slightly. She couldn’t believe she had said such horrible things to him. So much for her emotional control lessons. On the brightside nothing had  exploded this time. She looked away from him not wanting to meet his hurt eyes. He looked pale, almost sick. It almost looked like he could have cried. She caught her breath and looked at him with hard eyes.

“Leave me alone,” she whispered hauntingly before leaving Draco alone in the library, just as Madame Pince was rounding about to ask the students to leave her library from the loud outburst.  

He knew she was never going to listen to him. She had given him no choice.

“It was Black,” he burst making her stop. “It was Sirius Black, that left you in the abbey that night.”

Not turning around she continued on her way back to the dormitory brewing on the name she hadn’t been expecting. Her heart hammering in her chest. Eyes wide in horror at the revelation.

[emberbent]

QUESTIONS FOR YOUR OCs

[Originally posted by @cassandrapentayaaaaas, whose name apparently is also Elle, ayyyy. I’ll be filling this out for my Fire Avatar OC Shinza, and maybe also for some other characters later.]

What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?

Previous to her airbending training, Shinza would have had a hard time being still and doing nothing for longer than a few minutes. Not out of a need to burn off energy, but out of a fear of being alone with her thoughts for too long. Now, she can meditate and be still for over an hour, or much longer if she takes short breaks. She sat for eleven hours for her tattoo, which was the longest she’s gone doing nothing.

How easy is it for your character to laugh?

She doesn’t appear to be easily amused - she’s more of a smirker than a laugher if she finds something funny. Unless she’s among people who are close to her, or she’s drinking pear sake.

How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?)

Shinza’s one of the lucky ones who falls asleep as soon as she climbs into bed. She doesn’t have to do anything special to fall asleep.

How easy is it to earn their trust?

Hard to say. Maybe moderate? She doesn’t like to reveal much about herself unless she really trusts someone not to abuse that information, which isn’t all that often. She’s self-reliant enough that she doesn’t need others to help her most of the time, which can be seen as untrusting. But really, all it takes is showing compassion and self-awareness to get her to let her guard down.

How easy is it to earn their mistrust?

Fairly easy, since her default mode is not overly trusting.

Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable?

She's always had trouble determining which rules are or should be flexible vs enforced. Now that she’s in a position where she’s more or less exempt from following rules as necessary to keep balance, she’s realizing it’s even more complex than she ever thought. She contemplates often whether she has a duty not to follow the rules she holds others to, or to lead by example and hold herself to those same standards.

What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?

The smell of petrichor mingling with the oily smog of Republic City brings her back to when she was small, and she would walk with her mother, a doctor, every day to the clinic. Her mother would hold her hand, and they’d traverse in silence, except to point out the stray capuchin cats sheltering under the Satos on the street, or Shinza would ask for a treat from the bakery.

What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child?

Twirling, dancing, spinning around, singing. It wasn’t that her parents discouraged her from these normal activities, but she often didn’t have the presence of mind to refrain in the wrong situations.

Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word?

Not often; usually to emphasize her point. She distinctly remembers being nine years old and watching someone walk into traffic. A bystander earthbent them out of the way just before a Sato could run them over. She said her first curse word aloud as she rode in a cab with her father. He wasn’t mad.

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?

She never got into habitual lying. Too much to remember, too much guilt.

How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)?

Lucky for her, she has thousands of past Avatars to talk to. 

How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach?

She has long arms - this isn’t normally an issue.

What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color?

Black and shades of red; absolutely.

What animal do they fear most?

Shinza’s not afraid of any animals in a phobia sense, but she does think canyon crawlers are fairly ugly, and she’d hate to meet one.

How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

She thinks before she speaks, but she doesn’t rehearse what she wants to say before the conversation happens. She speaks deliberately and rarely says something she doesn’t mean. 

What makes their stomach turn?

The normal stuff - gore and viscera, bad smells, being anxious or nervous.

Are they easily embarrassed?

Very much so, although she tries not to let it show.

What embarrasses them?

The biggest thing is having her flaws or screw-ups used as an example to a group. She also suffers pretty bad secondhand embarrassment watching others do embarrassing things.

What is their favorite number?

She doesn’t have one.

If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

She’d explain familial love as distinctly separate from platonic or romantic love in that for her, it comes from a place of duty as well as physical proximity and similarity. Her personality closely matches both of her parents’, so they naturally got along well most of the time, which made them feel close, which she might define as familial love.

She feels there’s very little difference between platonic and romantic love, and that one can easily morph into the other and back. These are based on things outside of physical proximity or biology, like shared interests, a common goal, and sexual attraction. Sometimes it’s as simple as, “I don’t know. I just love them.”

Why do they get up in the morning?

Duty. Responsibility. The sunlight coming in through her window has woken her and she can’t go back to sleep. 

How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)?

It manifests as deep sadness and a feeling that there’s a flaw she should fix in herself that will make the situation better. Then it festers into shame for having those emotions or caring at all, and she becomes aloof.

How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)?

She might pine for whatever this other fortunate person has that she doesn’t for a second, but then she shrugs it off.

Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom?

She’s happy to talk about sex in an academic sense with acquaintances, but she’s only comfortable discussing her own experiences with her best friend Nero. Even then, she squirms a little.

What are their thoughts on marriage?

She likes the idea of loving someone so much that you’d enter a legally binding, life-long contract with them, and she certainly sees the financial and social advantages. As to whether she wants to get married herself, she’d be perfectly fine either way.

What is their preferred mode of transportation?

Xia, her dragon companion. Especially now that she’s not afraid of heights or the open air anymore. Plus, they just get each other - no words needed. They had a strong bond from the beginning, but ever since Xia saved Shinza’s ass in Gaoling, Shinza feels closer to her than ever.

What causes them to feel dread?

Knowing that the world is watching every move she makes, and that everything she does (or doesn’t do) will go down in history. Knowing that if she can’t protect herself, she could be the last Avatar.

Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth?

Definitely not. Being lied to is something she has a hard time forgiving, and she’d much rather deal with the ripples of an unpleasant truth than feeling she can’t trust the person keeping the truth from her, and finding out anyway.

Do they usually live up to their own ideals?

No, but Shinza holds herself to impossibly high standards.

Who do they most regret meeting?

Yanyu, the ex-Dai Li agent who her parents hired to block her bending and repress her memories when she was little. Shinza thought Yanyu wanted to meet with her in Gaoling to apologize for her role in letting the world go for so long without its Avatar, but it turned out to be a trap; Yanyu attempted to subdue her and turn her over to The Organization.

Who are they the most glad to have met?

Amrit. She came to him on the Island of the Sun Warriors thinking she was a nonbender, that she couldn’t possibly be the Avatar, and he helped her through that confusion. He unblocked her chi and helped her flame. Maybe he was a little too hard on her during training, but he taught her the value of working til you puke. He’s always had her back, even from the first day.

Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke?

No. Shinza rarely leads conversations.

Could they be considered lazy?

Not by any stretch. She’s deliberate, diligent, and hard set on doing things right and thoroughly.

How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt?

Very, which is detrimental to her role as the Avatar. She doesn’t know yet that she will live with the burden of guilt for her decisions and actions her whole life, or how to be okay with that.

How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive?

She’s a supporter and an attentive listener. She does her best to follow up with questions or mention small details later. Unless it’s something like a friend being excited about getting back together with her toxic ex - then she’d be clear about where she stands on the matter. 

Do they actively seek romance, or do they wait for it to fall into their lap?

She’s never sought out romance, but she has experienced and enjoyed it. Romantic love isn’t something she requires to feel happy or validated.

Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)?

She doesn’t have a system - she just remembers things like patterns, numbers, and names. It’s a gift that, oddly enough, she was bullied for in school. Sometimes she forgets that others don’t have such an incredible memory and gets frustrated with them, but she’s working on it.

What memory do they revisit the most often?

Leaving Nero alone at the bar, mouth agape, as two Fire Nation officials all but dragged her out the door with them. She never got to explain to Nero what happened after she figured it all out, and she hasn’t seen her since that day almost two years ago. The guilt eats at her.

How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?

Fairly difficult. She can’t ignore her own flaws, so she’s unable to extend that to others. She’s working on it though, and she’s got Amrit to practice on. No shade tho.

How sensitive are they to their own flaws?

Extremely. She was an only child, so her parents were hawks circling her, watching her every move. They didn’t pick on her on purpose, but it was pretty clear to Shinza that they were disappointed she didn’t go to medical school or join the military. On top of that, she grew up believing she was a nonbender, which culminated in a general, oppressive feeling that she was deeply flawed.

How do they feel about children?

She was an only child and didn’t grow up around her extended family, so she doesn’t have a lot of experience being around kids. Before, she could think of worse things than raising a child of her own. But now, she can’t fathom trying to balance her duties while raising a child.

How badly do they want to reach their end goal?

The shame of leaving the physical and spirit worlds out of balance and being remembered as an ineffective Avatar is unfathomable to her. She’d say she wants it more than anything.

If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so?

She’d say she’s sexual, sometimes, and leave it at that.

QUESTIONS FOR CREATORS

A) Why are you excited about this character? 

In every OC, I think there’s at least a little bit of their creator; I didn’t intend for Shinza to end up so similar to myself, but she is. And as I develop my own sense of self, I see that reflected in Shinza when I write her, and that’s pretty exciting.

B) What inspired you to create them? 

I’d been wanting to write an Avatar OC story for a long time, and nothing felt right or fun or exciting until I considered using Shinza, a character I’d had stewing in my head for a while. Once I pictured her in the Avatar world, things started falling into place pretty quickly.

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story? 

Absolutely. I planned the story from start to finish so I knew where I was headed, but along the way, Emberbent!Shinza started to take shape in unexpected ways and deviate from the original plan. As her personality in this story evolves, I have to figure out her reactions to things, and the ripples from those reactions, from a new perspective. I don’t have a clear view of her transformation arc, because it’s happening in real time along with mine. The (already flimsy) ending I’d intended has been blown to smithereens, and I have no idea how it’ll go - I’m essentially 50% pantsing at this point - but I feel less frustrated knowing I have more room to see what happens.

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look? 

She’s had a number of different physical appearances. At one point, she was a monk child in a DND campaign I played in. In the preliminary planning stages of Emberbent, she looked like Nero, her best friend, and was an Earth Avatar.

E) Are they someone you would get along with? Would they get along with you?

I like to think we’d get along, but we’d both have to be okay with natural silence. Neither of us are inclined to lead conversations.

F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

All of the above. Pride because of how hard she’s worked to get where she is; excitement because of all the horrific and wonderful things she’ll go through to turn her into who she’ll ultimately become; and frustrated because she feels flat to me, so I’m assuming she feels flat to others too.

G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most? 

She can’t see past her own nose yet in terms of her role. It will take some time for her to realize she has to relinquish all of her own desires and happiness to her duty as the Avatar. For now, she’s stuck in selfish-mode, doing her best to help those close to her while trying to maintain her grip on her old ego.

H) What trait do you admire most? 

While she’s still working on seeing things from a broad perspective, she has an innate ability to deeply understand people, their feelings, and the situations they find themselves in. She’ll drop everything in order to help.

I) Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe? 

Yeah. I’m not into crossover fics... yet.

J) Did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create their character?

Mmm, I don’t know about manipulating canon, but I definitely extended it and filled in some parts as needed. Since she’s not the Avatar that came directly after Korra, I had to create the character that came between them. And since Shinza’s timeline is well after Korra’s, I had to envision what Republic City and the world would look like 70 years or so in the future.

Edit: Actually, just kidding. I forgot I totally manipulated canon when I figured out a way for Shinza to reconnect with the Avatars before Aang.

[enbycalicocat]

Day 27: 24th of February, 2021

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TW! +Mentioned bullying (doesn’t happen in the story) +Maybe a bit of mentioned violence (but nothing too bad, and it doesn’t happen in the story) . That said, this story seeks to portray what I consider is very good advice on how to deal with bullying (from personal experience) and it is over all very positive. Don’t let the trigger warnings scare you and keep you away.

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"I swear you could convince anyone of anything." Matie stared at me, eyes slightly awed but also amused. "I'm sure if you could meet a dead man, you would be able to talk him into thinking he's alive."

 "Ah, well, from what I've read, the dead don't really understand what happened to them and find it hard to believe they're not living anymore, so that would be really easy," I said with a smile.

 Matie laughed and we kept on eating, silence settling around us. Then, Matie looked up at me with a glint in their eyes and a playful smile.

 "I thought of a fun exercise for you."

 Chuckling through the food in my mouth, I waited to swallow before putting down my fork and knife and answering.

 "Let's see what you thought of."

 Matie smiled even more when they saw I was willing to join the game.

 "Okay so, you have to convincingly argument in favor and push the worse advice you've ever been given."

 I laughed because that was a very interesting proposal indeed.

 "Alright, let me think."

 We kept on eating as I turned and turned the gears in my mind, trying to remember the worst advice someone had ever given me. At first, I couldn't remember anything that was specially bad. But then a lightbulb turned on in my brain.

 "Well, you know, the thing with advice, is that no matter what, it would always sound very logical. Short of saying, «Yes, you should indeed jump off the top of this building and try to fly» or something along those lines, there's really nothing that would be really hard to argument for. So, I don't think this game will end up being much fun."

 Matie's face fell as they probably thought I had decided not to play.

 "That said, I still think it's a very interesting exercise."

 Smile curling right back up, Matie's eyes began to twinkle as they stared at me, waiting with baited breath.

 "I'll be very honest with you here. The very worst advice I've ever been given is ignoring my bullies at school."

 The face in front of me changed yet again and Mat watched me with curiosity and confusion.

 "And it's something still being said today. Kids out there are still receiving this 'great' piece of advice from teachers and friends and parents around them.

"I could sit and tell you all the reasons why it's such a very bad thing to suggest. But, that's not what the game's about. Hence, I'm gonna argue in its favor first. And then I'll explain why it's all crap."

 Pausing for a bit, I tried to get my ideas in order and plan the things I would say.

 "Mat, like, I don't even need to strain my mind to come up with ways to defend and push this. No matter who it is that gives you this jewel, they always make it sound really convincing.

"For one, the bullied person typically would be perceived by the people close to them as 'superior' or 'above' the bullies. Thus, one of the main arguments is that if you begin answering the things bullies say, if you take revenge, or start doing things back to them, and that type of thing, you're lowering yourself to their level. Basically, engaging them reduces your everything, intelligence, morality, ethics, dignity, you name it.

"Because bullying often stems from envy, from you having some attribute the bully wishes they had but they don't, or wants but can't be bothered to get, or had but isn't brave enough to show it like you. Also, it's a way for people to make themselves feel like they have more power than they actually do. So, it's all based on the lacking of something, and using cheapskate easy methods to deal with it instead of bothering to put in some effort. But you did put in the hard work, and that makes you better.

"The second most important argument is that if you ignore them and keep yourself from reacting long enough, the bullies will get bored and leave you alone. Think of children. When a kid doesn't feel like whatever they're doing or watching is engaging or interesting enough, they get bored and go do something else. As we grow, people are the same, we often find things that call our attention, and become obsessed with them; but then after a while, they lose their shine or whatever drew us to them, and we turn away from them, in search of something new.

"Same thing should happen with bullies. If you're not interesting enough, after a while, they should leave in search of something else.

"I'm just gonna use those two arguments, because they're the most convincing, and because I really can't think of any other logical sounding thing to say. Not to a bully victim anyway.

"But so far, so good, right? Everything sounds very plausible and convincing?"

 Matie nodded with a thoughtful face, probably considering everything I said.

 "To be honest Kate, if I had a kid or knew of someone who was bullied, ignoring them is what I would've recommended."

 I smiled at Matie, as the next words dropped from my mouth.

 "The thing is that everything I just said is a load of crap. It's all lies. The bases are true. But the buildings on top of them are all made of flimsy poker cards."

 A frown clouded Matie's forehead.

 "I don't see how."

 "Marina Abramović once, for one of her performances, stood still for six hours and insisted that she wouldn't move no matter what was done to her. In a nearby table, she placed seventy-two objects, some threatening and some non-threatening: feathers, flowers, parfumes, a knife, and a loaded gun, among others. Then she invited the audience to use these things on her however they wanted. The conclusion was that at first the people were very peaceful and shy, but they quickly scaled to violence. They cut her clothes, they pressed rose thorns onto her stomach, and one even pointed the gun at her, but another person from the public interfered before the first could do anything drastic."

 A gasp involuntarily came out of Matie's throat, their hands covering their mouth in horror. Meanwhile, I continued to smile pleasantly.

 "When the six hours where over, Marina begun moving and walked among the public, looking everyone in the eye. But the people that were so brave before, now could not look at her, they avoided her eyes and ran away, escaping the confrontation that her gaze represented.

"We may not want to believe it, but in these type of situations, where there is someone unwilling or unable to fight back and there is someone else with more power or stronger, and given other right circumstances, humans will become mere animals. At that point, the bully, will easily dehumanize their victim. Because they're not fighting back, because they're not defending themselves, they're not reacting like humans are supposed to do. Instead, they become objects, and are treated like so.

"You can also think of it like preys and predators. As long as the prey doesn't fight and the predator can easily get what they want, they'll keep on coming back. Because the food is quickly to gained through this method. And so, there will be no stopping until the whole species or race is extinct.

"Thus, bullies won't stop if you ignore them. They won't lose interest. And if you don't fight back, you are, in fact, becoming something even 'lower' than them: an inanimate and unfeeling object. You're willingly taking away your humanity, while the bully still retains theirs.

"If you blindly and without caution leave your integrity and life up to the public, they could very well kill you, as Marina demonstrated. You can entrust yourself to people, there is no need to doubt the whole world and fear everyone might kill you. But not without being healthily skeptical, not without testing first, not without being prepared to fight in case it's needed.

"To sum things up, the fighting, the reacting, the standing up for yourself, the seeking help, is what keeps you human, and what will ultimately, be good advice against bullying."

 Matie smiled at me brightly but with tearful eyes.

 "I said it before, and I'll say it again. Kate, you can certainly convince anyone of anything."

 Tilting my head, my smile turned that much brighter at the compliment. I just hoped this ability, this power of mine that Matie so admired, would stay with me in the future. Just like I convinced Matie today, I wanted to be able to convince the victims of bullying, other kids, parents, teachers, and everyone in every case I ever work with, of the same thing: ignoring bullies and bullying was not and would never be a solution.

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Referenced Marina Abramovic performance

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Prompt: 27. Write a compelling argument pushing the worst advice you’ve ever been given.

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Previous Day Next Day

[scotiaeire]

JUST THINKING OUT “LOUD”.

I’M AN OLDER WOMAN, WHO GREW UP IN THE TIMES WHEN IF YOU HAD A TELEVISION YOU WERE CONSIDERED WELL OFF. VIDEO RECORDERS HADN’T BEEN INVENTED YET. MOBILE (CELL) PHONES WERE THE STUFF OF STAR TREK AND SCI FI. THE NET? WE’D NEVER HAVE IMAGINED IT, EXCEPT IN STORIES.

AND HERE WE ARE. THE AVERAGE SMARTPHONE HAS MORE TECH IN IT THAN IT TOOK TO PUT ARMSTRONG ON THE MOON.

FEW FOLKS WATCH TV NOW, BECAUSE EVERYONE HAS “A DEVICE”, NORMALLY THEIR PHONES, TABLETS, WHATEVER THEY CALL THEM NOW. AT THE LEAST, A LAPTOP (ME. I’M A LUDDITE. I TOLERATE THE LAPTOP BECAUSE, GOING BLIND, I CAN’T *SEE* ANYTHING SMALLER)

AND WATCHING ALL THIS TECH COME INTO BEING, FOLKS OF MY GENERATION HAD OPTIMISM..IT HAD SO MUCH POTENTIAL. ALL THAT POWER, THE CAPABILITIES. WOULD IT HELP HEALTH BE DIAGNOSED OR TREATED EASIER? WOULD IT HELP FAMILIES SCATTERED ACROSS THE GLOBE KEEP IN TOUCH WITH ONE ANOTHER?

WELL, AYE, IT DOES BOTH OF THOSE THINGS.

BUT LOOK AT WHAT ELSE IT DOES...

IT ALLOWS HACKERS TO STEAL FROM THE BANK ACCOUNTS OF VULNERABLE OLD OR POOR PEOPLE. AND EVEN IF IT’S NOT CASH THEY WILL STEAL, IT’S INFORMATION, A LOT OF IT INTIMATE AND PERSONAL, PRIVATE. AND BY “HACKERS” I’M NOT JUST MEANING SOME GUY IN A BLACK HOODIE SITTING IN A DARKENED ROOM IN A BASEMENT SOMEWHERE. GOVERNMENTS AREN’T ABOVE WATCHING YOUR EVERY MOVE ONLINE EITHER, FROM WHERE YOU SHOP AND WHAT YOU BUY TO READING YOUR EMAILS, FOLLOWING YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA (SOME POOR BUGGERS  IN GOV OFFICES MUST HAVE HELLUVA BORING JOBS, REALLY...)

IT ALLOWS NARCISSISTS OF ALL AGES, TYPES AND MINDSETS TO CREATE “BRANDS” OF THEMSELVES..LITERALLY, SELLING THEMSELVES...BY SETTING UP ACCOUNTS THAT ARE CAREFULLY CURATED, CAREULLY STAGED, ALL TO PRESENT A LIFE THAT IS *NOT* THEIR REAL, ACTUAL LIFE, BUT MORE OF A WISHLIST.

IT ALSO, BY DEFAULT, HAULS MASSES OF FOLKS INTO SITTING ON THEIR ARSES, SPENDING HOURS SCROLLING THROUGH PIC AFTER PIC, POST AFTER POST, IMAGE AFTER IMAGE, JUST STARING AT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THEY DON’T KNOW AND PROBABLY NEVER WILL, ARE DOING.

WHAT A WASTE OF TIME AND ENERGY....

IT ALLOWS US TO BE TARGETED LEFT RIGHT AND CENTRE BY COMMERCIAL CORPORATIONS SEEKING TO SELL US JUNK, WHETHER WE NEED IT OR NOT. AND FAR TOO MANY FALL FOR THAT, WHEN THEIR CASH COULD BE SPENT MORE PRODUCTIVELY.

IT CREATES ENVY, AS THOSE WHO FEEL THEIR LIVES LACK EXCITEMENT OR ADVENTURE LOOK AT THE FAKE LIVES OF “INFLUENCERS” (THAT IS SUCH A LOADED WORD BTW) AND SO CALLED “CELEBRITIES” (WHEN I WAS YOUNG, TO BE A CELEBRITY, YOU HAD TO HAVE *DONE* SOMETHING OF WORTH OR AT LEAST, BE A HALF DECENT ACTOR, NOT JUST A PRETTY FACE) AND THAT ENVY IN TURN CREATES DEPRESSION AS FOLKS REALISE THEY’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO OBTAIN THOSE MAKE BELIEVE LIFESTYLES.

AND IT *IS* MAKE BELIEVE. TRY IMAGINING, FOR A MOMENT, YOUR FAVOURITE CELEBRITY SITTING ON THE TOILET. PICKING THEIR NOSE. LAZING AROUND ON THE SOFA WITHOUT A SCRAP OF MAKEUP, CONTOURING OR THREE INCH THICK EYEBROWS, READING TRASHY MAGAZINES.

IT ALLOWS “CYBER BULLYING” WHERE ANONYMOUS SHITTY PEOPLE THINK IT’S OK TO RIP TO SHREDS THOSE WHO ARE VULNERABLE, FRAGILE AND UNABLE TO FIGHT BACK.

I’M AN OLDER WOMAN WHO NEVER THOUGHT THIS TECH WE USE ON A DAILY BASIS WOULD EVER COME TO PASS. YET GOVERNMENTS ALLOW US THE USE OF IT, BECAUSE IT KEEPS US DISTRACTED FROM REAL LIFE. LIKE A DRUG FOR THE MASSES, AS THEY USED TO SAY TELEVISION WOULD BE. (THEY WERE RIGHT THOUGH...)

IT HAS BECOME, ALMOST, A NECESSITY AS, MORE SO IN THESE TIMES, FINANCIAL TRANSACTIONS SUCH AS PAYING BILLS, BUYING GOODS ETC, CAN ONLY MAINLY BE PERFORMED ONLINE NOW, AND TO DO THAT YOU *HAVE* TO HAVE A BANK ACCOUNT WITH CARDS, AND THEY REQUIRE NOT ONLY THOSE DETAILS BUT YOUR PHONE NUMBER AND IN MANY CASES, YOUR NAME, DATE OF BIRTH AND MORE.

THEY’LL WANT YOUR DNA NEXT BEFORE YOU CAN BUY A LOAF OF BREAD....

SEE WHAT THEY’VE DONE?

YES, THE NET HAS IT’S GOOD FACETS. BUT IN MY OPINION (WHICH DOESN’T COUNT FOR ANYTHING BUT HERE I AM, ON SAID SOCIAL MEDIA, GIVING IT ANYWAY) THE BAD OUTWEIGHS THE GOOD.

YOU’RE SPIED UPON. HACKED. BULLIED. ENVIED OR WILL ENVY. CONSTANTLY PAYING BILLS ONLINE. BUYING JUNK YOU LIKELY DON’T NEED ONLINE DUE TO CONSTANT ADVERTISING OF SAID JUNK.

WORSE, WE GET THE NEWS FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD AS AND WHEN IT HAPPENS.

BUT NOT THE GOOD NEWS, OH NOPE. WE GET THE WARS, KILLINGS, RAPES, VIOLENCE, SHITTY POLITICS, FEAR-MONGERING PLAGUE STORIES AND MORE. AND MOST OF US ARE NOT IN A POSITION TO HELP CHANGE IT OR DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. THAT’S THE SIMPLE TRUTH. ALL DESIGNED TO KEEP US IN OUR PLACE....RIGHT WHERE OUR RESPECTIVE GOVERNMENTS WANT US.

SO KEEP ON BEING DISTRACTED BY ALL THE PRETTY PICTURES. THE LOVELY PEOPLE. THE CAREFULLY STAGED LOG CABIN INTERIORS. ALL THE LOVELY STUFF YOU DON’T ACTUALLY *NEED* FOR SALE. SIT AND RAGE OR COWER OVER HOW “AWFUL” THE WORLD OUT THERE IS WITH THE INCOMING CONSTANTLY BAD NEWS, WHILST FORGETTING THAT EVERY DAY SIMPLE ACTS OF KINDNESS AND SMALL BUT IMPORTANT *GOOD* THINGS HAPPEN TOO. THEY’RE JUST NOT REPORTED IN MAINSTREAM MEDIA.

BUT DON’T FORGET, THERE’S A REAL WORLD OUT THERE. AND A LOT OF THIS GENERATION CAN’T WALK ALONG A STREET AND DARE TO LOOK ANOTHER PERSON IN THE EYE, IT MAKES THEM SO UNCOMFORTABLE.

NOBODY SMILES AND SAYS “HELLO” NOW. IT’S ALL HEAD’S DOWN AND SCROLLING.

IN EXILE IN BELGIUM, I ONCE SAW A TEENAGE GIRL LITERALLY COME WITHIN INCHES OF BEING RUN DOWN BY A TRAM BECAUSE SHE WAS CHATTING TO HER BOYFRIEND ON HER PHONE. I WAS ON THAT TRAM. INCHES.....

HEAD DOWN, GIGGLING AND LAUGHING. TRAM DRIVER HONKED THE HORN AND YELLED AT HER. SHE NEVER EVEN LOOKED UP. NEVER EVEN BLINKED. DID NOT DEVIATE FROM WHAT SHE WAS DOING...FLIRTING ONLINE WITH HER FELLA. AND SHE ALMOST DIED.

*THIS* IS WHAT MODERN TECH IS DOING.

DO I ADVOCATE WALKING AWAY FROM IT ALL? NO. BECAUSE IT *DOES* HAVE A GOOD SIDE. BUT I DO, AND ALWAYS WILL BELIEVE, PEOPLE HAVE TO FIND THE HAPPY MEDIUM..WHERE YOU USE ONLINE LIFE AND MODERN TECHNOLOGY AS A TOOL ONLY WHEN NECESSARY.

AND THAT YOU DON’T LET IT RULE YOUR LIFE TO THE POINT WHERE IF YOU HAVE A NET-LESS DAY, YOU FEEL EVEN FAINTLY ANXIOUS ABOUT IT.

THERE’S AN AWFUL LOT OF SHIT ONLINE. FAKE NEWS. LIES. DANGEROUS STUFF LIKE PORN AND PAEDOPHILIA MASQUERADING AS INNOCENCE. BAD POLITICAL AGENDAS. STUPID ONLINE FEUDS. EMPTY HEADED MEDIA (ASK ME IF I GIVE A F*CK WHAT ANY ONE OF THE BRITISH ROYALS EVER DOES OR WEARS....) AND AN AWFUL LOT OF PEOPLE FALL INTO THAT HOLE AND NEVER DIG THEIR WAY OUT.

BUT SOME ARE WAKENING UP. SOME ARE ADVOCATING TECH FREE DAYS. SOME ARE SAYING JUST WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING (WELL, MAYBE WITHOUT THE “WHEN I WAS A GIRL” BECAUSE THEY’RE MOSTLY YOUNGER FOLKS AND NOBODY LISTEN TO OLD PEOPLE ANYMORE, IF THEY EVER DID)

ANYWAYS, AFORE I SIGN OUT, HERE’S A FEW TIPS:

THAT INFLUENCER YOU’RE FOLLOWING? FAKE.

THAT CELEBRITY YOU ENVY? FAKE.

99% OF THE NEWS YOU’RE HEARING? IF NOT FAKE THEN SERIOUSLY MANIPULATED TO SUIT WHICHEVER GOVERNMENTAL AGENDA IT FOLLOWS. AND BY DOING SO, YOUR OWN MINDSET.

AND HERE’S A VERY SPECIAL TIP. IF YOU LIVE ANYWHERE NEAR TRAFFIC, LEAVE YOUR PHONE IN YOUR BAG/POCKET/WHEREVER. DON’T TAKE IT OUT AT ALL. AND ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN CROSSING ROADS/TRAMLINES/BUSLANES.

ABOVE ALL, TRY WALKING AWAY FROM IT FOR A WHILE ON A REGULAR BASIS AND TAKING AN ACTUAL LOOK AT LIFE AROUND YOU. THERE’S PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO AREN’T EVEN ONLINE. MAYBE THEY’D LIKE TO BE FRIENDS? TRY SEEING NATURE WITHOUT A CAMERA LENS...GO SMELL THE AIR, TOUCH THE LEAVES, WALK THROUGH THE SCENE YOU’RE TRYING TO SHOOT THE BEST OF. SIT A WHILE AND DRINK IT IN. EXPERIENCE IT FOR REAL.

(JUST HALF AN HOUR AGO I SAW A BEAUTIFUL IMAGE OF A YOUNG GIRL SITTING ON A DECK BESIDE A LAKE. BEAUTIFULLY STAGED, BUT I CAN TELL YOU FROM HARD EXPERIENCE, SIT THE WAY SHE WAS (BACK ARCHED TO LOOK SLENDER ETC) AND YOUR ARSE WOULD BE HURTING, YOUR SHOULDERBLADES GETTING SPLINTERS FROM THE WOOD FENCE AND YOUR TEETH FIRMLY GRITTED. JUST SAYING.)

I USE VIDEO CAMERAS TO TAKE IMAGES AROUND MY HOME. WHY? BECAUSE I’M ALMOST BLIND. I USE THE CAMS AS TOOLS. I TAKE FOOTAGE (WHICH INVOLVES AIMING IN THE GENERAL DIRECTION AND HOPING I’M ACTUALLY FILMING WHAT I WANT TO SEE) THEN I UPLOAD IT TO MY LAPTOP AND VID CHANNEL SO THAT, THROUGH A LARGER, CLOSER SCREEN, I CAN ENLARGE AND *SEE* WHAT MY EYES NO LONGER DO. IT’S THE ONLY WAY, NOW, MY EYES CAN SEE THE LANDSCAPE THAT SURROUNDS ME IN ANY DETAIL.

THOSE ARE TOOLS. THAT’S A GOOD WAY TO USE THEM.

I’VE SEEN SOME HORRENDOUS USES OF TECH OVER TIME. FROM THE GHOULS TAKING PICTURES OF ROAD ACCIDENTS OR PEOPLE BEING BEATEN (WHEN THEY SHOULD HAVE BEEN GOING IN TO HELP) TO THAT GIRL AND OTHERS ALMOST BEING KILLED, SO INTENT ON WHAT WAS ON THEIR SCREEN THEY WERE, IGNORING THE *REAL* WORLD AROUND THEM.

DON’T BE A SLAVE TO YOUR TECH. BE IT’S MASTER. AND COME BACK TO THE REAL WORLD AT LEAST ONCE IN A WHILE.

[lillibabble]

You can find the originals HERE  

ABCs of your OCs a list of oc questions in alphabetical categories - i made each category based on the first word I could think of in alphabetical order, so enjoy!

A: Aptitude 1. what are your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young?

Cath likes to sing, though maybe not infront of anyone. 

2. what activities have they participated in?

Klaus keeps a close eye on her, but she does enjoy archery

3. what abilities do they have that they’ve worked for?

Archery. She’s a horrible shot. 

4. what things are they bad at?

She doesn’t have the patience for art

5. what is their most impressive talent?

She can actually carry a tune quite nicely

B: Basics 1. what is their hair color?

Very dark brown, almost black 

2. what is their eye color?

Brown

3. how tall are they?

Five foot even

4. how old are they?

Almost 23

5. how much do they weigh?

uh

C: Comfort 1. how do they sit in a chair?

It depends.  If Klaus is in the room she sits with good posture, if not she has her legs folded up under her

2. in what position do they sleep?

With lots of pillows and wrapped around most of them. 

3. what is their ideal comfort day?

Wake up, shower, put pjs on, eat some breakfast, read most of the day, lunch, take a warm bath, read some more, nap, dinner, sleep

4. what is their major comfort food? why?

She loves warm chocolate chip cookies straight from the oven. They make her feel warm all over. 

5. who is the best at comforting them when down?

Probably Klaus or Bo 

D: Decoration 1. how would they decorate a house if they had one under their name?

I’m not sure if there is a stylistic name for it but its a mix of semi girly and minimalistic. 

2. how would they decorate their child’s room?

Probably similarly

3. how do they decorate their own room?

Still kinda girly, maybe a tad bit of what she would call messy

4. what type of clothes and accessories do they wear?

Lots of sweaters. Put together comfyish but she knows how to dress fancy if she needs to. 

5. do they like makeup/nail/beauty trends?

Sometimes? She picks at her nails so they don’t get too long but she wears a little bit of makeup. She likes to watch videos on makeup but isn’t necissarily into it

E: External Personality 1. does the way they do things portray their internal personality?

She’s extremely meticulous in how she does things. Everything has an order to be done. 

2. do they do things that conform to the norm?

Internally? yes. Externally? not really?  

3. do they follow trends or do their own thing?

She likes to fit it

4. are they up-to-date on the internet fads?

Some of them

5. do they portray their personality intentionally or let people figure it out on their own?

She doesn’t pretend to be mysterious, but she’s not screaming her business at others either 

F: Fun 1. what do they do for fun?

She hangs out with Quinn, explored with Bo

2. what is their ideal party?

No party

3. who would they have the most fun with?

Quinn and Kenzie

4. can they have fun while conforming to rules?

Ofcourse she can

5. do they go out a lot?

Not really, no 

G: Gorgeous 1. what is their most attractive external feature?

Probably her smile 

2. what is the most attractive part of their personality?

She’s super friendly and laughs a lot 

3. what benefits come with being their friend?

Her dad is a vampire?

4. what parts of them do they like and dislike?

She likes her hair and her eyes, she doesn’t like her hands 

5. what parts of others do they envy?

She wishes she had Quinns focus and Kenzie’s curls 

H: Heat 1. do they rather a hot or cold room?

Klaus keeps the house fairly cold and she’s okay with that. She hates being too hot. 

2. do they prefer summer or winter?

Winter 

3. do they like the snow?

Eh

4. do they have a favorite summer activity?

Icecream!

5. do they have a favorite winter activity?

Walking in the snow when everything is silent 

I: In-the-closet 1. what is their sexuality?

Straight 

2. have they ever questioned their sexuality?

Not really, no

3. have they ever questioned their gender?

Nope

4. would/was their family be okay with them being LGBT?

Probably. He’s been around for hundreds of years, he’s seen it all. 

5. how long would/did it take for them to come out?

She’s straight. 

J: Joy 1. what makes them happy?

Dreamsicles, denim jackets that smell like whisky, wool winter coats and how they’re scratchy to touch, cooking with her dad, Jorie singing somewhere in the house, the satisfying sound a crossbow makes when you knock it, the smell of books old or new 

2. who makes them happy?

Bo, Quinn, Klaus 

3. are there any songs that bring them joy?

She likes anything upbeat

4. are they happy often?

Yes

5. what brings them the most joy in the world?

Cara and Bo 

K: Kill 1. have they ever thought about suicide?

NO! 

2. have they ever thought about homicide?

No

3. if they could kill anyone without punishment, would they? who?

Geezus lighten up 

4. who would miss them if they died?

Klaus, Bo...a lot of people

5. who would be happy they died, anyone?

Kai maybe 

L: Lemons 1. what is their favorite fruit?

Oranges

2. what is their least favorite fruit?

Red apples, she likes green and yellow 

3. are there any foods they hate?

Shellfish

4. do they have any food intolerances?

Shellfish

5. what is their favorite food?

When Klaus makes cajun food its just...-chef kiss-   He never eats it though......

M: Maternal 1. would they want a daughter or a son?

Either

2. how many children do they want?

Maybe just one

3. would they be a good parent?

Of ofcourse 

4. what would they name a son? what would they name a daughter?

Finn or Cara

5. would they adopt?

Probably. She was adopted, so why not 

N: Never Have I Ever 1. what would they never do?

Hurt someone intentionally

2. what have they never done that they want to do?

Write a book 

3. is there anything they absolutely can’t believe people do?

Kill eachother

4. what is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done?

Its hard to pick just once

5. have they done anything they thought they’d never do?

Fell in love 

O: Optimism 1. are they optimistic or pessimistic?

Optimistic

2. are they openly optimistic, throwing it on others?

Sometimes

3. are they good at giving advice?

Not at all, no

4. is there anyone in their life that throws optimism on them?

Jorie probably

5. were they always optimistic?

Pretty much

P: Personality 1. what is their best personality trait?

She’s happy most of the time 

2. what is their worst personality trait?

She overthinks everything

3. what of their personality do others love?

She’s always willing to help

4. what of their personality do others envy?

I unno 

5. do they hate anything about their personality/about other’s personalities?

She hates that Kai is such a douche. She doesn’t like that Klaus holds onto her so tightly

Q: Questions 1. do they ask for help?

When she needs it

2. do they ask questions in class?

Sometime

3. do they answer questions that make them a little uncomfortable?

Sometimes

4. do they ask weird questions?

Oh yes 

5. are they curious?

Almost to a fault 

R: Rules 1. do they follow rules?

Most of the time 

2. would they be a strict or laid-back parent?

In the middle?  She lets Cara be herself and learn on her own but also knows when to draw boundaries

3. have they ever been consequenced for breaking a rule?

Oh yes 

4. have they broken any rules they now regret breaking?

Not really

5. do they find any rules they/others follow absolutely ridiculous?

Eh?  She thinks that some of the incovenience her but knows they are there for a reason

S: Streets 1. are they street-smart?

Lolno

2. would they give money to someone on the streets?

Probably

3. have they ever gotten in a fight on the streets?

Nah

4. has anything happened to them on the streets?

Everything from being tracked to almost being eaten

5. are they cautious when out?

She likes to think she is

T: Truth 1. are they honest?

Most of the time

2. can they tell if someone is lying?

If she knows them well enough 

3. is it obvious when they’re lying?

She will bite her lip or pick at her nails

4. have they lied about anything they regret lying about?

She probably should have been honest when she found out she was pregnant

5. have they told truths that have been spread against their will?

Not so far 

U: Underdog 1. have they been bullied?

A little 

2. have they bullied anyone?

No

3. have they been physically attacked by a bully?

No

4. have they ever been doubted?

Yes 

5. have they surprised people with being good at something?

Eh 

V: Vomit 1. do they vomit often?

She has a weak stomach

2. do they get lots of stomach aches?

Not really

3. are they good at comforting someone ill?

She has good bedside manner but as soon as someone starts extreting any sort of substance shes gonna puke

4. what do they like as far as comfort goes?

She likes to be held 

5. do they burp, cough, or hiccup most when nauseous? when vomiting?

What? 

W: Water

1. do they drink enough water?

Thats really all she drinks 

2. have they learned to swim?

Nope 

3. do they like to swim?

Nope 

4. can they dive?

Nope! 

5. can they swim without holding their nose?

Nope 

X: Xylophone 1. what is their favorite genre of music?

Folk probably

2. do they have a favorite song?

It changes 

3. do they have a favorite band/artist/singer?

It also changes 

4. can they sing well?

Extremely

5. can they rap?

Lol no

Y: You 1. how old were you when you created them?

26

2. what inspired you to create them?

I dunno, we were making a different AU 

3. were they different when they were first created?

Nah 

4. do you enjoy writing them more than other characters?

Shes easy to write but I wouldn’t say I like her better than Lilli or Adam 

5. what’s your favorite thing about them?

Shes so bubbly!

Z: Zebra 1. what’s their favorite animal?

Elephants

2. do they like animals?

Yes 

3. cats or dogs?

Doggos

4. what’s their dream pet?

All of them 

5. do they have any pets at the moment?

Does Bo count? 

[lankylevi]

Rating: E Pairing: Levi Ackerman - Eren Jaeger Words: 2k Tags: Top Levi, Bottom Eren, Yoga Instructor Eren, Thigh-fucking, smut.

Summary: When Hanji and Izzy had lured him into getting a gym membership, Levi hadn’t been expecting it to be this challenging.

Note: (Late) Happy Birthday, @dinklebertarts ! I hope you enjoy your little fic <3

Read on AO3 or below

When Hanji and Izzy had lured him into getting a gym membership, Levi hadn’t been expecting it to be this challenging.

With his ass up in the air, he groaned internally at how unbelievably hot it was in here, both literally and figuratively. Sweat beaded in his nape and trickled down his back. Disgusting. The hot temperature in the room was one thing, but their instructor took it to a whole new level.

Eren, their current hot yoga instructor and Izzy’s brother, was one hot piece of ass. In front of the class, he presented himself on all fours with his firm cheek up, showing them how to do the exercise, which Levi had long forgotten the name of, since all his blood was rushing down south, as Eren slid forward on the mat, arching his back and neck.

Levi mimicked the movements, grateful that he could finally hide the awkward semi he was sporting in these stupid yoga pants. He took in a deep breath and he instantly regretted his decision as his throat and lungs burned when the ridiculously hot air of the room coursed through him.

“What is it shortie, out of breath?” Hanji winked at him and Isabel giggled in response.

“We warned you about this class.” She added and crawled back into the starting position. “Who said hot yoga was a piece of cake, hmm?”

“Shut it,” Levi grumbled, black strands of hair sticking to his damp forehead. Repulsive.

Hanji snorted and repeated the exercise, gracefully sliding over their light blue mat until their back arched and they could stretch their neck. “You seem awfully stuck, shortie. Maybe our hottie over there can help you.”

“Ugh,” Isabel rolled her eyes, “please don’t tell me you’re still crushing on my brother.”

When Levi was about to defend himself, Eren got to his feet and turned around to face the class. Only Eren could make sweat dripping down his chin look sexy.The liquid dribbled onto his white shirt and it made him look like he came straight out of a wet t-shirt contest, making it even harder for Levi to stay somewhat focused. Fuck.

“Great work guys, keep it up,” Eren said and took a sip of his water; Levi totally envied that water bottle and would gladly have Eren sucking on something else.

Levi’s eyes widened and he tensed up when Eren began to walk around the room, putting his hands on his student’s hips to help fix their form. God have mercy on him.

Many women had to bite their lip when the brunet stood behind them and adjusted their pelvis’, hell, even Levi noticed how they thirsted for his cock - and who could blame them, really. Eren was an absolute masterpiece; gorgeous eyes, bright smile, tanned skin, broad shoulders, defined abs and thighs that Levi would gladly place around his shoulder so he could eat-

Furiously shaking his head, Levi breathed harshly through his nose to keep himself grounded. Why oh why had he agreed to come here in the first place. Hot yoga his ass.

“Are you stuck, Levi?” Eren teased and Levi almost flinched when the brunet squatted down in front of him, bringing his face down to his level so they were only inches apart. The instructor glanced over his body and couldn’t help but chuckle at the position Levi found himself in. “Do you need some help getting up? I could-“

“No.” Levi cut him off, a bit harsher than intended, and immediately tried to compensate by giving Eren a half-assed smile. “No, I’m uh- I’m okay. Just stretching.”

Eren furrowed his brows at that while Hanji and Izzy couldn’t help but bark out a laugh at their poor conversation. “Okay then. Keep stretching.”

With a contemplative nod, Eren got back to his feet and Levi let out a heavy sigh. Fucking hell.

“You got it so bad,” Hanji snorted.

“Yeah, yeah.”

When class finally finished, Levi thought he could quickly make a run for it, but Eren’s hand on his shoulder when he was rolling up his yoga mat foiled his plan. “Is everything alright Levi, you seemed to be really struggling today.”

Fuck him sideways. Levi shrugged and managed to keep a straight face as he told Eren a blatant lie, “Guess I left my brain at work.” He made a move to get out of Eren’s hold but the brunet squeezed his shoulder tighter.

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent,” Levi mumbled through gritted teeth as he squinted at his two ‘friends’ who giggled and winked at him when they left the room.

The brunet followed his stare and let out an amused puff of air as he shook his head, “Isabel is such a bully. As if she’s never had a crush on her teacher before.”

Levi choked on his spit, “Well, shit.”

“Yeah, you’re not very subtle.” Eren grinned, “And I heard Izzy pestering you during class.”

Pursing his lips, the raven hummed as he contemplated leaving right then and there, but with the way Eren was eyeing him up and down as he bit his lip, he knew he had to take this chance. “Guess I no longer have to try and hide my boner, then.”

Eren’s face instantly heated up, cheeks turning crimson and he placed both hands on his hips to keep himself steady under Levi’s intense stare. “That was upfront.”

“Says the one looking at me like I’m a piece of meat.” Levi scoffed, noticing Eren’s flustered fumbling with the hem of his shirt. Strike one. “But who am I to judge, I’ve been lusting after you since day one.”

Eren looked at him, flustered and as red as a tomato. He shook his head, unable to keep himself from averting his gaze. Strike two. “I don’t get it.”

“What’s there not to get? You’re a hot piece of ass and the positions you contort yourself in are just, well, you get the idea.” Levi winked and darted out his tongue to lick at his bottom lip. His confidence grew when Eren’s eyes shot up and he heard a small whine escape his throat. Strike three.

Eren realized his defeat the second Levi took a step forward. All he could do was gulp and stare as Levi swatted his hands away and replaced them with his own, pulling him forward until their bodies were flush together. “Fuck.”

“I might take you up on that offer one time.” Levi chuckled and traced Eren’s firm abdomen with his fingertips. The yoga instructor’s body was like a wet dream, but now, after weeks of torture, he could finally lay his hands on him.

Eren shuddered under his touch and Levi felt the brunet’s cock twitch when he gripped onto his thighs. Sensitive thighs? He was hitting all of his kinks today.

Smirking, he latched onto Eren’s lips and didn’t hesitate to swipe his tongue across his bottom lip. The brunet happily obliged and let Levi’s tongue delve into his mouth. Tongue tickling the roof of his mouth, Levi got a filthy moan in return and dragged Eren towards the wall covered in mirrors. He pressed him against the glass, hands roaming over his body as he devoured his mouth.

A high-pitched whimper was all that left Eren’s lips as he was so deliciously manhandled and he whined desperately when Levi’s hands stopped pressing into his thighs.

Levi turned him around so he faced himself in the mirror as he dropped down to his knees and massaged and bit his way down. Slipping his fingers under the elastic band of the Eren’s pants, he dragged them down until they fell to the floor. He smirked and couldn’t help but suck and nip at the glorious naked thighs presented in front of him.

After rolling the sensitive skin between his teeth, drawing out more whimpers and moans, he got back to his feet and lazily stroked Eren’s heavy cock before noticing the brunet hiding his face in his shirt. Levi was having none of that.

“Look at yourself,” Levi reached up around the brunet and grabbed his chin, forcing him to stare at his reflection in the mirror. “You’re so fucking sexy, Eren. Fuck.”

Eren glanced up at their reflections, finally seeing what Levi saw; his neck was flushed red, hair a mess, chest heaving with every breath he took, cock dangling heavy between his legs, thighs spread apart. He shook his head, voice breaking, “I’m not.”

“Yes you are,” Levi said and met his eyes in the mirror, blown wide with need; leaving nothing but a ring of silver to stare back into, and grabbed Eren by his thighs. He kneaded the flesh, a guttural groan leaving his throat at how perfect Eren’s body fit in his hands. Smirking, he grabbed the brunet by his hips and pulled him back, grinding his clothed arousal between the two round globes of his ass.

Eren whined, panting harshly as he reached behind himself, desperately tugging at Levi’s pants, frantic to get to his hard cock. And Levi eagerly obliged.

When he slipped his dick in between Eren’s gorgeous thighs, the brunet let his head roll back against his shoulder as Levi lazily started stroking his cock. Collecting the bead of precome and smearing it over his shaft, he messily thrust his cock between his legs. Hot, slippery and pulsing with every snap of his hips.

Levi groaned and licked a stripe over Eren’s shoulder, biting down on the junction between his collarbone and neck with a smirk. Eren was losing it fast. Who would’ve thought he had been lusting after him as much as he had?

Thumbing the slit, the raven drew more sinful noises out of the brunet, tugging on his hair and bringing him to his level so he could whisper in his ear; telling him how beautiful he was and what a good boy he was being for him.

Eren bit his lip, moans and whines escaping his throat, tears stinging in the corner of his eyes and threatening to fall as Levi licked the shell of his ear and picked up his pace. “Lev- I’m, I’m close.”

He felt Eren’s body go rigid, cock pulsing in his hand and he knew it’d only take a few more precise thrusts and pumps for the brunet to fall apart under his touch. “Then be a good boy and come for me.”

After a few more tugs, followed by gradually stuttering breaths, Eren’s balls tightened and his release splashed on the mirror in long ropes as he cursed out Levi’s name with a strained cry.

Levi groaned out Eren’s name as he followed suit, eyes squeezed shut, hiding his face against the brunet’s back. It had all gone a bit too fast to his taste, he had wanted to savor every little noise and twitch Eren made but the build-up lust had taken over. He blamed Eren and his gorgeous thick, muscled thighs.

They both stood there, panting for a few minutes before Levi tucked his softening cock back into the confinement of his pants and Eren reached down to pull up his own.

“I should uhm, probably clean this,” Eren croaked out and awkwardly rubbed his nape. “Can we, I don’t know…”

“Do this more often?” Levi grinned and ran his hand down Eren’s back, not stopping himself from giving his ass a firm squeeze, “Or date?”

“Yes,” Eren chuckled and cocked his head to the side, cheeks still tinted pink as he leaned down to leave a quick peck on Levi’s parted lips. “And yes.”