#I genuinely don’t think I’ve cried this hard…. ever?

[yellobb]

I just love that I can think about something a little too hard and it suddenly feels like it’s real.

I’m sobbing uncontrollably over my grandma dying when she’s literally fine. Girl let’s not do this yet please

[heybaetae]

.

[baby-yongbok]

𝘗𝘪𝘯𝘬 + 𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘦

Hwang Hyunjin 𝗑 Afab!Reader

♡ Genre - Friends to Lovers

♡ CW - Explicit Sexual Content, Unprotected Sex, Nightmares, Alcohol usage by reader, Hyunjin calls reader rose as a nickname, One use of 'y/n'.

♡ Summary - Your avoidant tendencies have allowed the burn of pink and white to keep you Hyunjin at a safe distance until it all comes crashing down. Can the fire that kept you apart also be what brings you together?

♡ Word Count - 9.2k

♡ A/N - I went from not being sure if I liked this fic to being in love with it. I think that it's a very sweet fic and I loved writing it. I worked so hard on it and I'm so proud of it. The goal was for it to be 4k words.. then I almost posted it at 8k but now... yeah. I hope that you love this as much as I do!

♡ Playlist - Pink + White - Frank Ocean, Rainy Days - V, For Us - V, Beautiful Things - Benson Boone, Trajectories - Bruno Major

✧ Masterlist ✧

When you were six years old you punched a boy in the face on the playground. That was the first time that you ever felt the burn of genuine fear.

Your mom along with the many others came swirling around them. When your mother asked you what happened you cried. You clung to her running over to you and the crying brunette boy on the playground with a mix of emotions and explained the best you could through your tears that you didn’t like that he was chasing you, when you agreed to play tag you thought that you’d be the chaser not the one being chased.

That was the day that you learned two things about yourself, you have a habit of acting impulsively when you’re scared and you don’t like being chased. It's suffocating.

As you got older your friends described you as the avoidant type, especially in relationships. You developed a reputation for being an ice queen in your Sophomore year of university which led to you being one of the most sought after girls on campus. 

You’ve lost friends because of this. Their boyfriends saw getting close to them as a gateway to meeting you. Many guys took dating you as a challenge with an end prize of overnight popularity. Unfortunately, some of your closest relationships have been destroyed because of it. You learned not to be sad about it, you’ve come to terms with it, this is just the way that it goes. Of course your other friends were all important to you but you always told yourself that you’re alright with losing them as long as you have your best friend by your side. 

“More roses? Are you in love or something?” You weaved through the cluttered art studio that Hyunjin has claimed as his own. It’s on the dead side of campus on the second floor of a building that was abandoned last year. Your best friend refused to let the studio go when it was shut down, he says that it houses some of his fondest memories. 

“Always in love, never loved back.” He quips, eyes still trained on the canvas. “You’re early.”

You jump up onto one of the few clear desks in the room, right behind his easel. “Chemistry ended early.” Hyunjin stands straight, eyeing his canvas for a second before looking over at you. He knows that you’re skipping class. Your last hook-up is in that class and you're trying to avoid his attempt at getting you in his bed again. If you’re being honest, the decision to sleep with him was impulsive. You blame the beer, all eight of them.

“I thought that we could go to the exhibition early.” He starts another brush stroke and silence swallows you both. “I’m excited about it and if I’m being honest I just wanna spend time with you. I’ve barely seen you for the past three days.”

Hyunjin’s steady hand wavers and he thanks his lucky stars that you didn’t see it. “Aw she misses me. She loves me so much.” The sound of your feet hitting the ground as you jump off of the desk echoes through the dusty room of stacked chairs and forgotten storage items. 

Hyunjin stands and dips the paint brush covered in bright pink in the cup of water next to him. “You could’ve come to my place ya know.” You grab your stuff, swinging your bag onto your shoulder. 

“Your brother is there, you know how he gets.” You scrunch your face at the thought of Hyunjin’s step brother, Jeongin. The two of you get along perfectly, almost as well as you and Hyunjin until Jeongin starts flirting. He confessed to you on New Years and you’ve been avoiding him ever since. He’s too sweet for you, you’d hate to hurt him. “I’m gonna go change, I’ll meet you by your car.”

“You brought a costume change for an art exhibit?” He asks as he starts cleaning his space.

“Of course, I need to look like art too.” You smile at him but he doesn’t smile back, he rolls his eyes and turns his attention back to the mess of paints and rags on the desk in front of him. He waits until he hears the door open and close behind you to finally let the corners of his mouth turn up. He chuckles to himself quietly while his mind comes up with responses that he’d never dare to utter out loud.

“This one looks like you, rose.” The year old nickname slips off of Hyunjin’s tongue like silk. You’ve never fully understood how the name stuck. You figured that it’s because roses are his favorite flower and he thought it was cute. You’ve never asked for its origin but you don’t mind the name. It’s sweet.

You turn to view the series of pink, white and green dots making up a bouquet of roses on the framed canvas in front of Hyunjin. He studies it with smiling eyes though the neutral look on his face could fool those who haven’t experienced him like you have.

“It’s pretty.” You mumble as you lean your head on his shoulder. You wrap your arm around his and the sleeve of the brown oversized flannel shirt that you picked out a year ago rides up his forearm a bit, he blames the chills running up his spine on the breeze against the newly exposed skin. 

“I knew I’d see you here.” The voice of a woman next to Hyunjin startles you a bit. You stand straight and watch as Hyunjin smiles towards her. He’s cursing her in his head for interrupting the moment between the two of you but he learned a long time ago to just live in the moment when it comes to you.

“Of course, I had to see this exhibition.” He shakes her hand and you chalk it up to her being someone important though she doesn’t look much older than either of you. “You put it together beautifully.”

Ah, she owns the gallery. “Oh, please, it’s nothing. I just hope that you’re enjoying it. I actually thought about you when I put this piece up.” She motions towards the art in front of the two of you. The piece that Hyunjin says resembles you. “It looks like something you’d design. I’m still desperate to organize a local exhibition for you, ya know.”

Hyunjin laughs but it's stiff and polite. He’s being shy. He’s a very cautious person but he reaches a whole new level when it comes to his art. “I’m not quite on that level yet.”

“I disagree but I won’t bother you about it until you graduate. This is your final semester, right?” You can see her eyes smiling just like Hyunjin’s were a second ago as she checks him out. She’s shameless in her actions, the glint in her eyes is far from professional. 

“Yes, just three months to go.” She nods, dragging her gaze up from his lips with a smile. 

“Call me when you graduate, I’d love to have you working with us.” She pulls a business card out of her pocket and flashes one last smile before waving a reluctant goodbye towards your best friend. 

Silence settles between the two of you for just a couple of seconds before you break it. “She wants to fuck you so badly that she didn’t even look at me.” Hyunjin scoffs at your whispered words as he slips the card into his pocket. “Don’t tell me that you didn’t notice. How old is she anyway? She looks a bit young to be in charge of this place.”

“Her father owns it.” He mumbles as he grabs your wrist and leads you over to the next piece of art. 

“Oh, of course. She probably thought I was your girlfriend, ya know. She’s rude as hell for not even asking or looking at me. I know she saw me here, she’s clearly -” You’re pulled into Hyunjin’s side before you can finish your sentence. The sudden action cuts you off with a heavy thump of your heart and that painfully familiar burn rising in your chest. 

“Look at this one.” Your eyes are on him but his are on the art. “This one looks like you too.” You pull your gaze away from him to view the piece. The thumping in your chest doubles once your gaze meets your own. It’s a mirror with pink and white abstract designs floating around and over the glass. The paint is so messy yet strategic. It leaves just enough room for your reflection. 

“It’s messy yet elegant, don’t you think? You can’t help but to stare..” He’s visibly smiling now. The corners of his mouth turn up as he studies the art in front of him. As he studies you. “This one might be my favorite. It’ll be hard to beat it.”

“I don’t like it.” You mutter quickly, pulling away from Hyunjin and turning towards the next piece. You try your best to steady your breathing. You will your heart to calm down so that you can take a complete breath but it’s betraying you. “I’m gonna use the bathroom.” 

You’re walking away before Hyunjin can reply. He watches you with that smile in his eyes as you disappear around the corner. He knew that what he pulled would be a risk but it was one that he was willing to take. He doesn’t call you beautiful nearly as much as he should or as much as he really wants to. 

In the bathroom you’re slumped against the door of a stall while you try to catch your breath. You don’t like how Hyunjin’s words made that white hot burn in your chest kick up. You don’t like the way that his eyes being on you made you feel like you were the only two in the entire gallery. It’s suffocating. 

When you step out of the stall your fingers are busy on your phone screen. You find your friend Isa’s number quickly and take a sigh of relief when she answers on the third ring. You bypass reciprocating her kind greeting and get right to the point. 

“Get-together at yours tomorrow?”

You’re standing in the middle of the Pink and White art exhibition. Other viewers jumble together along the walls of the gallery and crowd the pieces. You can’t see anything but their blurred faces decorating the white walls. There’s a slow yet heavy beating in your ears but you’re comfortable. You’re alone in the middle of it all, watching everyone from a pleasant distance as you turn to study them all as if they’re the art on the walls.

 The beating in your ears skips as you turn and come face to face with Hyunjin. He’s standing in front of you wearing that brown hat that you love and the oversized flannel that he bought just to share with you.

 Suddenly the others in the room are quiet. All eyes are on you but Hyunjin’s gaze is the most piercing. His brown eyes are smiling at you with a softness that makes the flame in your chest burn brighter. 

“Why are you staring at me like that?” You look around at everyone else but they’ve vanished along with the art on the walls. The beating in your ears picks up, it’s deafening but Hyunjin’s voice can be heard loud and clear over the noise.  

“I like staring at you.” He takes a step towards you but you take two back. He frowns and steps forward again. You repeat the process until your back is against the wall. “Why do you do that?” 

“I’m not doing anything.” You swallow hard as you try to push him away but he’s stronger than you. As strong as stone caging you against the stark white wall. “I can’t breathe.” You’re pushing as hard as you can but it’s no use. You’re stuck under him.

“Why do you do this?” He’s still staring down at you, a burning gaze setting your skin ablaze. “Why do you keep running?” The beating in your ears drowns out all sensible thoughts. You can feel your veins swelling with fear and the blinding white burning in your chest puffs up with the crushing pressure of having him so close. Too close. 

“Back up.” You inhale the thick air, feeling dizzy. “Move.”

“Stop running.” You try to inhale but it gets stuck in your throat. You want to scream. You need to escape. You need to get out of here. 

You lift your heavy arm the best you can and pull back enough to punch Hyunjin. You aim for his face but your fist goes through him just as your lungs start to burn, you take one last look at him before the wall behind you gives out and you’re falling backwards. Hyunjin watches you, his eyes are void of that sparkling smile and guilt consumes you right before you hit the ground.

You jump up with a gasp as your eyes frantically search the room around you. Your chest rises and falls heavily and sweat beads at your hairline.

It was a dream. 

Friday is a late day for you with your last class ending at nine in the evening. Hyunjin always waits for you in the abandoned art studio, he waits for two hours just to walk you to your dorm across campus. It’s become a routine for the two of you but you told him not to wait up tonight. He was reluctant at first, he insisted on waiting for you but you were adamant about breaking your routine.

He agreed eventually but you could see the dejection in his eyes as he hugged you goodbye before your last class. He watched you walk away just like he always did but this time his heart was heavy in his chest. Did he do something wrong? 

That question haunted him throughout the day. It was loud in his head as he collected his stuff and made his way to the abandoned studio. It echoed in his ears as he tried to finish the painting of his vibrant rose that he’s added notes of dusty pale pink to. But it was the loudest when Jeongin called him to ask if he was going to the get-together at Minho’s place tonight.

He knows that you and Minho’s girlfriend Isa are close so you have to know about this, hell, you might’ve even helped plan it and you kept it from him. You’re avoiding him.

You skipped your class to head to Minho and Isa’s place. They share a small apartment right off of campus that you often use as an escape. Isa is one of the few friends that you still have from sophomore year since her boyfriend has never once tried to get in your pants. 

You sat on Isa’s bed clutching a bottle of soju that is not at all meant for one person while you laid your head in her lap. You loved being with her because there was never any pressure to fill the silence. She understands you in a way that other people just don’t. Not even Hyunjin. 

“So, he called you pretty?” You’ve been telling her everything from what happened at the art gallery to the nightmare you had last night. “And now you’re avoiding him?”

“I’m not avoiding him.” You take a swig from the glass bottle and gulp hard to rush the alcohol into your system. “I’m just being careful.”

“You’re being careful by avoiding your best friend… because he called you pretty and you had a nightmare about it?” You sit up with a groan, lifting the bottle to your mouth again with a sigh. She’s not getting it. 

“You didn’t see the way he looked at me. You didn’t feel the way he pulled me into him, his arm wrapped around my waist and he just stared at me with that smile in his eyes. You know the one that makes his eyes shine when he sees something pretty? He was looking at me like that and he told me that I looked elegant. Messy but elegant and that he couldn’t help but to stare. There was a softness in his voice, I swear, and he just wouldn’t take his eyes off of me. It’s like he was looking into me instead of at me it was… it was..”

“Sweet?” You tap the bottle in your hands with your nails. 

“Suffocating. It was too much. It made my heart skip and it made me feel hot.” 

“That usually means that you like him, ya know.” She takes the bottle from you, drinking from it a bit herself. “ You know that he’s a romantic and this isn’t the first time you’ve felt like this with him.” She hands the cold glass back to you while you think back to the other times that you’ve felt this. The latest being your birthday three months ago when Hyunjin whisked you away to the next city for a mini getaway. 

You stayed in the same hotel room and on the night of your birthday you had a bit too much to drink. He carried you up to your room since you were too out of it to walk but you weren’t too far gone to forget the way that he handled you with such gentle care.

He brushed your hair out of your face when he laid you on your bed and took your make-up off with such a tender touch that it made you want to kiss him. You almost kissed him. 

“I don’t like him like that.” You shrug and she sighs. 

“Whatever you say, ice queen.” That damned nickname makes you cringe but Minho is bursting through the door before you can rebuttal. 

“Jisung and Bin just got here, come on.” You stare at him with confused eyes and he crosses his arms as he stares back at you. “Well? Get up, you wanted to do this.”

“Do what?” You look over at Isa who’s already getting up from the bed.

“Did you not call her asking for a get-together? People are getting here so come on. I’m not hosting this by myself.” Your heart drops and you stare over at Isa who looks back at you with her own look of confusion until it all sinks in.

 “You meant for it to be just us, didn’t you?”

Hyunjin is a cautious person, anyone who knows him knows that about him. He doesn’t like when things go wrong because of him. It eats him alive until he can fix it and if he can’t he lets the anxiety consume him until a part of him dies with the memory of it all. 

His cautious nature is what prompted him to drive home after he got that call from Jeongin. It brought him right to his bedroom where he dropped his bag by the foot of his bed and laid back against the mattress with a death stare set on the dull ceiling. It stared back at him, reflecting his thoughts back to him for him to analyze. 

His brother left for the get-together as soon as he walked through the door and Hyunjin was tempted to follow him down to Seungmin’s car.

He was tempted to drop his bag and turn on his heels and come straight to you but he knew better. He knew you better than you knew yourself. If he shows up at that get-together you’ll avoid him like the plague. You’ll feel trapped by his presence and any hope that he has of fixing this situation will die right in front of his eyes. 

His cautious nature is what’s keeping him on his bed. It’s what’s grounding him to this spot and sating the burning desire to chase you. The problem is that the fire in his chest is bigger than he can handle. He’s seen how you treat the men you want to avoid on campus, he’s seen you take the long way home just to avoid a conversation and the thought of you doing that to him makes him wilt. He can’t let that happen. 

His feet are carrying him across his room before he can even fully process it. He opens his closet and pulls out the brown flannel along with his brown beanie. They’ve become comfort items for the both of you at this point, especially the flannel. It feels like a thread connecting you to him and him to you. He needs to save that connection.

 He sloppily throws on the items while he checks the clock. He’s nearly two hours late but there’s still time. 

Hyunjin has never gotten a speeding ticket but he was nearly positive that he’d get one tonight. He made it to Minho’s place in record time but he’s panting when he knocks on the door like he’s ran there. His heart is hammering when Isa answers the door and the look on her face when she takes him in only makes his heart beat faster. 

She forces a smile, inviting him in and telling him where everything is but he already knows all of that and she knows that he does. “She doesn’t want to see me does she?” Isa sighs, giving him a look that answers each and every one of his questions all at once. 

“Thanks for letting me in.” He walks past her with a nervous huff, making his way into the small party and searching for you immediately. He finds Changbin and Chan before he can find you and the two quickly drag him into a conversation about gods know what while wedging a glass bottle of mystery liquid into his fist. 

Hyunjin’s eyes wander in an attempt to find you as he ignores his friends' conversation. Luckily it didn’t take long for the sound of your loud laughter to echo through the room. His eyes were on you in an instant once he heard it. You’re right in front of him sitting in the truth or dare circle with a can of something strong in your hand. You’re always the loudest in the room but right now you seem to be the drunkest too, you shouldn’t be playing that game you’ll do something reckless.  

He wants to go over and pull you up, he wants to tell you that you’re going home and that you need to sober up. He wants to get you to talk to him but he ignores everything he wants and watches you instead. He stays cautious and keeps his distance. 

“Y/n, truth or dare.” One of your few girl friends, Harvey asks from across the circle. You answer ‘dare’ with a wide smile, it’s no surprise, you always pick that. The raven haired girl looks over to Mingi for assistance since she’s known for picking terrible dares. After a couple seconds of deliberation the blonde perks up with an idea.

“I dare you to kiss whoever this bottle lands on.” Mingi dares with a nonchalant smile and you shrug, the alcohol in your system is surely boosting your confidence but it’s not like you’ll remember any of this tomorrow so who cares, right?

He spins the bottle in the middle of the circle and everyone watches with quiet anticipation as it lands on the copper haired boy sitting three people away from you. It’s Jeongin. 

He stops in the middle of sipping from his cup and flashes you a small innocent smile but what you return to him is nothing less than a look of raw seduction. You’re on your feet in an instant, making your way over to him with low and hazy eyes. You straddle him swiftly, getting comfortable in his lap like you’ve done this a hundred times. 

“You sure about this, noona?” His hands rest on your thighs, he brushes his thumbs over the bareskin and you can feel a shiver down your spine. It almost reminds you of how Hyunjin touched you on your birthday. 

“Do you not wanna kiss me?” You tease him with a slight slur to your voice. You know he wants to kiss you, everyone does except for Hyunjin, right? 

Just as that thought passes your eyes flicker up and meet those of the very man on your mind. He’s watching you with an angry gaze as he fists the neck of the glass bottle in his hand. Your mouth goes dry as you take him in, when did he get here? You feel stuck staring at him, everything around you is suddenly muted and the people around you disappear. It’s only you and Hyunjin.

Both of your hearts are pounding in your chest. 

Both of you feel like you can’t breathe. 

Both of you are about to do something that you shouldn’t.

“Kiss her already!” Ryujin instigates from across the circle and you snap out of your haze and blink down at Jeongin. You both share a smile, one more genuine than the other, before he’s leaning into you. His lips just barely brush against yours before you’re interrupted.

A firm grip on your shoulder startles you and the man under you. You both look up to meet the eyes of the angry Hyunjin above you.“Get up.” He practically growls with a slight tug on your arm. You stare up at him with glassy eyes though you are feeling a bit more sober now. “Get. Up.” 

You’re being pulled up before you can process it. Your feet fight to keep up with him as you stumble towards the bedroom he’s leading you to. You can feel all eyes on you, you can feel the room getting smaller once he locks the bedroom door behind the two of you and pulls his flannel off to drape over your shoulders, something that he does to comfort you. 

“What the fuck?” That’s all you can manage to get out of your mouth as you stare over at him. He stares back with his arms crossed and his chest rising and falling with what you perceive as anger but he would describe as anxiety. Pure fear. 

“Do you understand what you were about to do?” Hyunjin tries to be mindful of his tone. He tries to limit the waver of his words and calm the frantic thoughts in his head. He’s trying. “Why would you kiss him?”

“I didn’t.” The alcohol in your system takes over again and you thank the ridiculous amount of soju you’ve consumed for coming to the rescue. You tug on the flannel resting over your shoulders, pretending that its warmth would protect you from the buzzing in your head and inevitable burning in your chest.

“You would’ve if I didn’t stop you. What happened to you not being into Jeongin? What happened to you not wanting to hurt him?”

You groan, stomping your foot like a child being scolded by their guardian. Like the little girl who punched the brunette boy in the face for chasing her. “Why don’t you mind your business?”

Hyunjin scoffs, his anxiety grows in his chest and he takes a step back. “You are my business.” 

It’s silent for one, two, three heartbeats before the dizzying emotions burning in your chest fill in the silence for you. “Well maybe I shouldn’t be. You’re way too attached to me.”

Hyunjin feels frozen even though he’s stepping back from you. He’s creating more space between the two of you just like you seem to be doing. What do you mean by that? You’re rambling on before he can ask. “You do all of these things that make me feel like I can’t breathe. You call me pretty and you touch me softly and you hold me close and… and you just make me feel hot. You suffocate me.”

Hyunjin whispers through the bubbles forming in his throat. He’s gentle with the way he speaks, he is a cautious person after all, especially when it comes to his art. “Is this about what I said at the gallery?”

His question goes in one ear and right out the other. Your brain formulates words quicker than you can process them, creating a violent episode of word vomit that threatens to spill over your lips and onto the carpet but you swallow hard and condense it all into one simple yet seering sentence. “You keep making my heart race, it’s not fair. You need to go, just go.”

Hyunjin’s blood runs cold and his temples throb like you’ve hit him. Like you’ve punched him in the face. Anxiety bubbles in his veins and swells behind his eyes. It’s his turn to ramble, the word vomit seems to be contagious. 

“I’m not leaving.” His gaze is frantic, cautious, scared. “I am too attached, you’re right. I have been for a while. I’ve loved you for a while and I tried to hide it but I shouldn’t have to. I shouldn’t be scared that I’ll lose my best friend if I tell her that she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

 “No, you are not confessing to me right now. Don’t you dare do that.” You pace to the left then the right in a hurried attempt to escape his words before they could reach you. He can’t be doing this right now. You needed to get out of here.

“I am. I am confessing to you. I need you to hear me say that I love you because I do and it scares me just as much as it scares you but you are the reason that it’s scaring me. Losing you is the reason that I’m afraid and I need you to tell me that that isn’t going to happen.” His voice is shaky just like your hands. He watches you like a dog being dropped off at the pound as you physically try to escape him. He knew this would happen, this is what he was afraid of. 

“Stop. Just stop it, Hyunjin. You’re doing it again, I can’t breathe when you’re this close to me.” He stares over at you from the other side of the room and you stare back at him. This doesn’t make any sense. He isn’t next to you but you still can’t breathe. It doesn’t make any sense. “I have to go - I have - just… just leave me alone.” You turn towards the bedroom door but he speaks up before you can make your escape. 

“I’m not going to chase you.” Hyunjin is unmoving. His feet are still planted to the floor like a statue as he slips his fists into his pocket. “I don’t want to push you further away but don’t you dare go home and convince yourself that I don’t care just because I let you go.” 

You listen to him over your hammering heart with your back turned to him and your unsteady gaze trained on the worn door knob. “I’m letting you go with the hope that you’ll come back. You know where to find me.” 

Your feet threaten to betray you, they try to turn you around and drive you over to him but your heart is screaming. That white flame is burning in your chest and begging you to run. Run as fast as you can and find safety, but your safety is standing behind you. It’s watching you with teary eyes that are desperate to meet yours. 

A tear slips down your cheek as you grab the doorknob and pull it with a quick twist. You follow your heart and rush out of the room with tears decorating your face and your hand over your mouth. You let the burning win again.

You rush past everyone, Isa tries to stop you and Minho even catches you for a minute but you fight him off of you and make your way to the front door. You don’t get too far before the last layer of your resolve snaps, You turn onto the next dark block and sink to the ground. Sobs rip through you as Hyunjin’s words hang in your head. He loves you. He wants you but you left him. You left everything you’ve ever wanted behind you. 

A heavier sob escapes you as the truth of it all comes crashing down. You love him too, don’t you? You’ve loved him for so long. Since your birthday and beyond that but you’ve been avoiding it. You’ve avoided your feelings just like you have everything else. You’ve punched yourself in the face, you’ve chased yourself into a corner and now you might just lose everything you have left. You might lose your best friend.

The storms over the next two days swirl the skies into mysterious clouds of pink and white as rain soaks the grass the same way that you’ve soaked your pillow for hours. You’ve opted to stay in, avoiding anything or anyone that could remind you of Friday’s catastrophe.

 You’ve debated texting Jeongin and apologizing for what you remember of the situation. You almost called Isa to spill the fears bubbling in your lungs to her so that she could help you sort through them but she can’t. This is up to you. You need to make a choice. Will you run away from the fire or towards it? 

On the other side of campus Hyunjin sits in the abandoned studio with paint stained hands and dried tears on his cheeks. He’s left his previous painting incomplete. The bright blushing rose sits across the room with the others just like it while he touches his brush to the canvas and smears a smoky mauve to the pristine white flesh. His lines are messy and uncalculated. Far from cautious. 

For a moment he considers that he was only ever careful because of you. Your lack of control over your emotions inspired him to fill in the blanks for you. Now there’s no need for caution without you.

The rain carried into Monday along with the emptiness in your chest. You’ve typed and deleted paragraphs to Hyunjin who has done the same as he sat on the studio floor.

He stayed in the dusty room until midnight each day that he was without you and you stayed up well past then. He poured himself into painting and you poured yourself onto the carpet of your dorm room. You made lists and mapped your emotions until it all started to make a bit more sense. Until the love that burned alongside your hot white fear was glowing pink in the mirror. 

You skipped your classes on Monday, your feet drove you over to the dead side of campus through the violent rain. You stood in the hallway outside of Hyunjin’s studio. The worn copper doorknob stared back at you like it knew what you were here to do. Like it was daring you to go inside. You suck in a breath as you grab the metal, you’ve never been one to back down from a dare.

The studio is empty when you walk inside. The fading warm light of the lamps that you and Hyunjin bought and snuck in illuminate the space the best that they can given the dull pink skies. Your eyes catch on the new piece sitting up on his easel. It’s dark and runny, it’s raw and it feels like it’s calling your name. 

“Hi.” Hyunjin’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. His voice is small and surprised as he stares over at your frame clad in that famous brown flannel and sweatpants. 

“Hi.” You whisper back. He looks like a mess. Brown hat, pulled too far over his head and his hair spilling from every exit it can find. “More roses?” 

He stares passed you and over at the wilting petals on the canvas with a sad smile. “It’s like I’m in love or something.” 

Your guilt tinged heart beats a bit faster when he steps further into the room and closes the door behind him. He drops his bag next to the door and stares at the dinghy tile with his hands in his pockets. “I’m sorry. For everything, for the party and everything with your brother and for everything that I said.” 

The word vomit is back. It spilled over your lips before you could attempt to swallow it back but you’re almost thankful for it. You have no clue how you’d get your words out otherwise. “You just made me feel… I just felt..” You kick at the cracked tile as if it holds the answers you’re looking for but Hyunjin beats you to it.

“Suffocated.” His eyes are on you now, they’re low and shadowed in a longing sadness. “I’ve seen this happen a million times to other guys and I thought that I was being careful enough to avoid it.” 

“This is nothing like the other guys.” Your bag slumps off of your shoulder and you carelessly allow it to hit the floor. “Your confession just -” He cuts you off with a tight smile.

 “I know. It ruined everything.” He sighs, sad eyes examining the space between the two of you. “I ruined everything and I’m sorry for that, rose. I really am.”

“It didn't. It didn’t ruin anything, it just scared me. I felt suffocated, yes, but not by you. It was by what I felt for you. That’s why this isn’t like what happened with any of the other guys. I never wanted them. Avoiding them was easy but you… avoiding you..” Hyunjin watches your heaving chest with the caution that he thought had abandoned him. He’s quiet, allowing you time to gather your thoughts. He doesn’t want to corner you, he just wants to hear you. 

“Why do you call me that?” You whisper once your breathing has steadied. “Why did you start calling me rose?”

Suddenly he’s looking past you then down at the tile under his feet. He leans against the door behind him, a faint smile decorating his sad face. “You were wearing one in your hair on the day that I realized I love you.” He looks over to where his easel is set up. “We were sitting right there and you had a pale pink rose behind your left ear. You picked me one to match and I told you that it was my favorite flower because in that moment it was. It was beautiful but you…your beauty is hard to beat.”

Your heart is thumping in your ears, it’s a sound that you’ve grown comfortable with over the past few days. The clutter of the abandoned room almost seems to disappear as you process his words. The burning in your chest makes itself known along with the newly identified pink flame. The white walls of the studio almost seem brighter as you receive Hyunjin’s confession. You let it sink in and drown out the tension little by little. “So when you paint them…”

“I’m painting you. I’m always painting you.” The thumping is deafening but Hyunjin is clear over the noise. He has always been the only one who can cut through it all, even in your dreams. 

You can feel yourself falling just like in your nightmare only it’s forwards. You’re falling forwards as your feet carry you to him. You run. You run to him and you fall into his arms that have been desperate to catch you for months. The burn in your chest is paralyzing, it’s seering and fighting the pink flame for dominance. 

You cry into his chest, you sob as the pain of running into the fire engulfs you. It swallows you whole and you stand in it with him, you cling to him before you burn to ash and he holds you like he knows it all. He cradles the back of your head like he can feel the fire ripping your flesh apart. 

You’re flush against him, tears soaking his shoulder and burning all over until he does what no one has done before. He puts it all out. A simple kiss to the top of your head dowses the flame and reduces it to a measly spark of fear overshadowed by an uncontainable pink and white glow of love in your chest. 

You gasp at the cooling effect. Air rushes into your lungs and you can finally breathe, he’s the oxygen you needed. He’s everything you’ve needed but now you want to give your air away again. You want to give it all to him. 

You pull away from his shoulder in one swift motion, your eyes are shut tight as your lips find his and you pull him into a hard and messy kiss. The sound that escapes you both is desperate and beautiful. His lips move with yours in an uncoordinated rhythm that makes your lungs burn comfortably. They burn the way that they’re supposed to. 

Hyunjin cries into the kiss. Tears stream down his cheeks as he cradles you against him like you’d vanish if he didn’t. He drinks it all in, he allows himself to live in this moment that he’s been dying to have with you for what feels like an eternity before he reluctantly breaks the kiss. 

His eyes are still closed when he pulls away. He whispers to you, careful not to crack the shell of this delicate moment. “I thought you -” 

“I don’t want to keep running. I can’t, I need you. I can’t lose you.” Your eyes flutter open at the same time as his. He stares down at you with that smile in his eyes. That smile he has when he sees something beautiful, when he’s utterly enamored by the sight before him. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know how to do any of this, I only know that I want to do it with you.”

He’s quiet for a couple of seconds before a smile sneaks up on him. It fades just as quickly as it came and his eyebrows pinch together. “You want me?” You nod and the smile shows itself again. 

“I want you.” He leans back in, cupping your cheek as he kisses you hard. His body pushes against yours and you move with him as he walks backwards towards one of the few empty desks and lifts you onto it. 

His hands explore every inch of you that he can reach. He balls his fist over the baggy flannel hiding your body from him while your fingers tangle in his hair and scratch over his shoulders and up his arms.

 He breaks the kiss to run his lips over the flushed flesh of your neck, he whispers into your skin between each kiss “Tell me to stop.” He pulls at the collar of the flannel to kiss the curve of your neck. “I’ve waited so long for this, please tell me to stop. Tell me to wait.”

You push his head further into the crook of your neck as you tilt your head further to give him better access. “I don’t want you to.” He sucks a mark into the skin right below your ear and you pull his tucked in shirt from his pants with an elated moan. 

His clumsy fingers fight to unbutton the oversized flannel as yours attempt to unbutton his jeans. You reach your goal before he does and waste no time capitalizing on your victory. You dip your hand in just enough to fish his growing erection from his briefs and wrap your hand around it. 

Hyunjin moans at the stimulation, leaning his forehead against yours and squeezing his eyes shut as you stroke him slowly. “Fuck, please don’t, I wont - I can’t last.”

 You kiss his temple softly, whispering reassurance that you don’t care to have him last, you just want to have him. Once he’s centered himself again he continues his struggle to expose your body to him. The final button falls open like the curtain to a play and he stares down your scantily clad torso like an audience in awe. 

His hand moves on its own as he admires you. It dips into the waistband of your sweatpants and swipes over your clothed clit.

 Your head falls forward to rest on his shoulder with a quiet moan as he groans into the air. Your grip on his cock tightens a bit in response to the sensation and he hisses. “Please tell me I can feel you. Is it okay? Can I?” 

He doesn't want your first time to be here but he wants you. He needs you. 

Hyunjin hooks a finger into the damp gusset of your panties and pulls it to the side just enough to slip a finger into your waiting cunt. You pant in his ear, wanton moans bubble over the brim of your lips as his free hand cradles the side of your neck. “Look at me, please look at me, baby.”

 He runs his thumb over your cheek, brushing over the path of your dried tears. “So pretty, this must be a dream.” You shake your head. Speaking between moans. “Not a dream, baby.”

 He slips in another finger as you circle your palm over the head of his cock and you both moan. “Please tell me I can.” He leans his forehead against yours, his desperate eyes reflect the look in your own.

“You can. Please, I want you to.” 

“Have you ever thought about it?” He’s asking before he can process it and you’re shaking your head before he can even finish his sentence. A shy glaze washes over your desperate gaze as you watch him undress you.

 “You’re all I ever think about.” He whispers as he hooks his thumbs into the band of your pants. “You’re all I’ve wanted for the past year.” 

“I’ve loved you since my birthday.” You blurt out, vulnerable eyes peering into his. “Maybe even before that.” He runs a finger over your clothed cunt and you shudder under the touch.

“I wanted to kiss you the night of your birthday. You looked so beautiful but you were wasted. You wouldn’t have remembered. I just stared at you, I took your make-up off and I brushed the hair from your face and you stared back at me. I was just dying to kiss you. I was dying to confess.” Your hand runs slowly up his shaft and he swears that he feels electric. 

“I wanted to kiss you too.” He’s quiet, staring back at you with a smile. “That’s why I was staring”

“I kissed your forehead when you fell asleep.”  He pulls your panties down your legs, allowing them to pool at his feet with your sweatpants. “I knelt by your bed and whispered my confession to you.” 

His fingers are filling you again and you gasp while staring into his eyes. “I wanna hear it.” You whisper through a moan.

 “You want to hear my confession?” You nod, your gently fucked out gaze stares into his like your hypnotized by the moment. He scissors his finger into you, stretching you out just a bit before you’re gasping from the stretch of him replacing his fingers with his length. 

“Fuck, you’re inside of me.” Hyunjin stills with a groan. His forehead rests on your shoulder while he silently begs himself not to come undone just yet. He sucks in a breath before he recites all that he can remember. 

“You’re everything that I thought it would be to fall in love.” He whispers as he pulls back, thrusting into you slowly. “You really snuck up on me, I don’t know what I expected though.” He lifts his head to look at you as he sinks back into you. “You became my world so quickly. So effortlessly.”

 You cup his face with both of your hands as you bite back your moans. You want to hear him loud and clear. You want to remember every word. “I should’ve known that I’d fall in love when I first met you.” He picks up the pace, falling into a messy rhythm that’s accompanied by a fit of moans and grunts. 

He struggles to keep his eyes on you. They flutter shut with each thrust as he feels himself float closer and closer to his climax. “Baby, I won’t last.” You wrap your arms around his neck and one of his wraps around your waist while the other rests on your thigh before creeping over to softly pinch and rub your clit. 

“Hyune, you’re gonna make me - gonna -” He cuts you off with a sloppy kiss, his tongue brushes over your parted lips to request access before making room for itself against yours.

“If you tell me that you’re gonna cum I won’t last another second.” He whispers against your lips and you moan against his.

“What if I tell you that I love you.” Hyunjin’s eyebrows pinch at the confession. That’s way worse than telling him that you’re close. “I’ve loved you back for as long as - as long as you’ve loved me.”

“Rose, baby, you’re gonna -” It’s your turn to kiss him now, it’s a mess of teeth and tongue but you love it. You love him and him you.

 You both pull away in tandem, twin moans ripping through your chests as you both announce yourself to the other. 

“I’m cumming, I’m cumming.” Hyunjin pulls out of you, painting your thighs in his sticky white release while his fingers toy with your clit to ride you through your orgasm. It’s loud and messy and beautiful. A romantic elegance that you want to live in for as long as it’s available. 

Once you’ve both come down from your high Hyunjin kisses your sweaty forehead and you kiss his. He pulls his bottoms up before grabbing the cleanest paint rag he has to clean you up. A comfortable silence settles around you as you ground yourself and take in the space.

“You didn’t finish that one.”

He follows your gaze over to the painting of the pale pink rose. The middle of the canvas contrasts the rest with nothing but dull line art to show the completed picture. It looks like a work in progress. “I know, but I think I like it like that.” He looks back over at you and you at him.

“It looks like you."

It’s been seven months. Graduation has come and gone in the middle of your blooming relationship with Hyunjin and you’ve dedicated each and every second of your budding love to taming the flame. 

Each kiss from him has kept the spark of fear at bay and each touch has taught you how to stop running. It’s been a slow and cautious process that he is more than proud to be a part of. He takes pride in it. He takes pride in being with you.

The smooth breeze of late summer brushes against your skin as you step out of your car. The white dress that Hyunjin picked out for you sticks to you like paint on a canvas as you make your way up to the art gallery. 

It’s buzzing inside, people stand and stare in awe at each piece while whispering and pointing to their favorite details. You stop and stand in the middle of it all, taking it all in with a slow spin on the balls of your feet. You take in every corner until you turn around completely and you’re met with the face of the artist himself. 

“Hi.” Hyunjin smiles down at you, brown baggy flannel hanging from his shoulders. 

“Hi.” You stare back at him with a gleaming smile in your eyes. You take in every inch of him, scanning him like he should be framed and hanging on the walls around you. 

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Hyunjin wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “I like staring at you.” Your response makes him beam a shy smile. 

“You should be staring at the art. The artist might get sad if you don’t.” He kisses your forehead before letting you go. Some people around you stare over at the two of you with curious eyes. They’re eager to put a face to the muse of the showing artist. 

You take his hand and lead him over to the piece that a couple is walking away from. You stand in front of it hand in hand as you study it for what feels like the millionth time. “This one is my favorite.” The incomplete pale pink rose stares back at you.

“And why is that?” Hyunjin has that smile in his eyes as he stares up with you. The memory of this piece's origin plays behind his eyes like a memorized movie. 

“I’ve been told that it looks like me.” You lay your head on his shoulder and wrap your arm around his. A chill runs up his spine and he blames it on you. You and the love he feels glowing pink and white around you. 

“There you are.” History repeats itself as the lady that you’ve come to know as Dalia interrupts the two of you. “I wanted to check in with you, how does it feel to finally have your own exhibition?” 

Hyunjin smiles at her politely, turning towards her a bit with his fingers still threaded through yours. “It’s amazing. Thank you, you’ve done a wonderful job putting this together.” 

“Oh, please, it’s nothing. This is all you.” You watch her as her eyes smile just as they always have. Her hand brushes over his arm in a carefully calculated move. She’s still shameless and unprofessional. “This piece is my favorite. The unfinished look is unique and raw. What inspired this one?” 

You grin to yourself as you listen to her. She’s trying so hard that it’s difficult not to laugh. 

“Actually.” Hyunjin pulls your hand a bit, leading you forward so that you’re right next to him. It’s impossible for Dalia to ignore you now. Her eyes scan you reluctantly and the smile on her face falters for a second before she pulls it together. Gosh, that's gratifying. 

“My lovely rose here is the inspiration for it all.” Hyunjin looks over at you with a glow that is unmatched even by the largest of flames. “None of this would be possible without her.” 

It’s like Dalia disappears once Hyunjin looks over at you. You’re the only two in the room as far as you’re concerned. “Oh, well that’s just - that’s wonderful.” Her staggered speech pulls you both out of your loving haze. 

“Such a … sweet profession of love.” She glares over at you though you’re sure that in her head she’s doing a wonderful job at hiding her contempt. “I should make sure that everything is running smoothly. Please excuse me.” 

She clears her throat awkwardly before she departs, you and Hyunjin both bid her smiling farewells before turning to each other with wide smiles. “Show off.” You push his shoulder playfully and he laughs.

“I didn’t do anything.” You roll your eyes as you both wander over to the next piece on the wall. You stare up at the two pink roses in a lone vase, a shadow of sunlight casts down on them both as they rise towards its shining glow. 

A comfortable silence blankets the two of you while you listen to the soft buzz of the people around you. You squeeze his hand softly and he squeezes back just as you open your mouth to speak. 

“She still wants to fuck you.” He smiles 

“Shut up.”

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[twirlyleafs]

“Matilda”

Max Verstappen x reader

TW: complicated relationship with parent and guilt but mostly fluff <3

A/N: based on the song Matilda by Harry Styles

~~~~

You can let it go, you can throw a party full of everyone you know.

“I think we should call off the party.” You said, not looking up from your plate as you continued parting your food. In your peripheral vision you could tell Max froze just as he was about to pop a piece of chicken in his mouth.

“What?”

“The engagement party. I don’t want to do it anymore.” You tried to keep your tone light, as if it didn’t really bother you when in reality you’d cried an hour about it this morning. For the past few weeks you and Max had been planning a party to celebrate getting engaged, or rather you had been supposed to. In reality you had planned it, Max avoiding the subject like the plague. Every time you asked him to sit down with you to look at something regarding it he’d suddenly been very busy and if you asked for his advice he’d just kissed you and told you it didn’t matter, that it was your choice. At first you’d been so excited about the party, not just to get to celebrate the love you shared with Max, but because you thought planning a party together would give you a hint of how planning a wedding would be. Now all it did was make you want to cry.

“Why not? I thought you were so excited?” Max placed his utensils down, frowning at you from across the table. You shrugged, moving some lettuce around on your plate.

“Yeah, but it’s fine. I think it’s best if we skip it.”

“But why?” He pressed and with a deep breath you looked up at him. Max offered the softest expression, genuine worry and confusion on his face. You forced yourself to give him a small smile.

“You don’t want to Max.” You stated simply and his face fell for a second before the frown was back. He opened his mouth to say something but obviously changed his mind, a silence settling over the table. You looked back down, poking the food around and occasionally taking a bite. It felt like forever before Max spoke up.

“I do want to.” The way he said it with a sigh had you looking up at him with furrowed brows. He shook his head when he met your gaze, obviously sensing your disbelief. “I do, I promise you baby. There’s just- I’ve been thinking about, well-“ Max didn’t seem to find the words, suddenly nervous. You reached your hand across the table, wiggling your fingers a bit. Max paused, a small smile forming on his face as he took your hand in his and leaned down to press a kiss against it.

“Tell me.” You mumbled, your thumb moving over his skin in the most comforting way you could. Max gave you a quick nod and you could tell he found it hard to express whatever it was he was about to say.

“I know we said we wanted our families and friends at the party.” He began, and you nodded. “And I do. Mostly.”

“What do you mean?” You were confused.

“You know I love my dad.” He began and it slowly dawned on you what this was about. You refrained from grimacing at the mention of Jos. The two of you had never really gotten along but that had never bothered you that much, Max had ensured you that Jos had never and would never get along with anything that took time away from racing. What made you really dislike your soon to be father in law was the way he treated his son. You’d seen Jos absolutely tear into Max for mistakes made by the team, by other drivers. You’d heard the stories from Maxs childhood, having been told the worst ones by his mother and sister since he would never share them himself. He didn’t want to put his dad in bad light, ever. Even when Jos definitely deserved it.

And not invite your family because they never showed you love.

“I know you do.” You agreed, leaving it at that. Max once again nodded softly, knowing very well how you felt about his father.

“And even though a part of me wants him there- I mean he is my dad.” Max paused again to take another deep breath, eyes fixed on your hands, before continuing. “An even bigger part of me don’t want him to come because I know he’ll either upset you or my mom or one of our friends.”

“Or you.” You added, knowing that even though Max had taught himself not to let it show when his father hurt him it affected him a great deal.

“Or me.” He agreed, quietly. “I think everything would be better if he didn’t come but I also feel this, I don’t know, intense guilt at the thought of not inviting him.” Maxs eyes shot up to stare at you the second you pulled your hand from his. He watched you stand up and for a split second he thought you were angry, but he quickly realized that you were rounding the table to come to him. Pushing his chair out he let you crawl up in his lap, his arms automatically wrapping around you. With a small pout on your face you let your hands cup his cheeks, forcing him to face you.

“Max.” You cooed, not being able to stop yourself from placing a quick but loving kiss on his lips before continuing. “You have every right in the world to invite, or not invite, whoever you want. Just because he is your father doesn’t mean he gets an automatic invite if you don’t feel like you want him here.”

“But it feels so mean.”

“He’s mean.” You stated, backtracking when you saw Maxs face drop. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. What I’m trying to say is that he put himself in a position where you’re even considering not inviting him. He did that. Not you.” You scratched your nails against his stubble, making him close his eyes momentarily. “I’ll support you no matter what you decide and I promise we will make the best of the situation whether he’s here or not. But you should only invite him if you actually want him here, not because you feel obligated. Loving someone doesn’t mean bending over backwards for them.” When Max opened his eyes again he immediately met your gaze and you could tell your words were slowly resonating within him.

“I don’t think I want him here.” You rarely heard Max be so vulnerable and it made your heart both hurt and swell with pride. He was standing up for himself.

“And you don’t have to be sorry for that. You don’t need to list anymore reasons other than the fact that you simply don’t want to.” You let your hands wander down his jaw and to the back of his neck, fingers threading through his hair. Max nodded slowly and even though you could tell he wasn’t quite there yet, he was one step closer to standing up for himself. You tilted your head, offering a soft smile. “You don’t have to decide anything right now Maxie, we can take some time.” Max couldn’t help but smile back, leaning down to kiss you.

You don’t have to be sorry for leaving and growing up.

“Thank you.” He mumbled, lips still pressed against yours. You felt his arms tightening around you and you let your head fall to his shoulder. Max let out a deep breath. “I’m sorry I’ve been stressing you out lately.”

“You always stress me out.” You joked, earning a soft laugh and fingers pressing into your side. You grinned and pecked his neck a few times, being the only thing you could reach while staying as comfortable as you were. “No but seriously Max, don’t worry about it. I get it. Just know that you can always talk to me about these things, about anything.”

“I know.” He whispered against your head and you smiled. Marrying Max would be the best decision of your life, you were sure of it.

[retroaria]

hey! I'm not really into nsfw stuff- sooo would you like to do something soft with reo? 😭 like, idk, him as a husband or father so with a family? THANK YOU SO MUCH 💗💗

✮⋆˙ domestic reo headcanons ✮⋆˙

a/n: this is so brain rotted i can’t even lie i think reo is just so easy to romanticize. pure fluff.

• | BLUE LOCK M.LIST | enjoy !! - aria 💜 | •

✮ I actually love this because i headcanon that reo would be a great dad :D at the very least he’d be extremely supportive of whatever his children wanted to do in their lives. He wouldn’t force them to follow in his footsteps like his father and he’d use whatever devices he could to ensure they can comfortably follow the path they choose.

✮ Would post about all his children’s accomplishments, or if you guys didn’t feel comfortable posting the kids he’d still take any chance to tell everyone about it - even his teammates who literally don’t care that his son got the highest score on the spelling test (they’re happy for him though). He secretly enjoys scrapbooking for his kids but they’re “your books” and he “just helps you with it sometimes”. (he’s the one who took almost all the pictures and saved every piece of paper his kid has ever drawn on)

✮ Reo is a charming husband, so charming and sweet it’s hard to be mad at him. He’s a bit lacking in cleaning/caretaking capabilities when it comes to the home but he puts in the effort??? He tries his best and if he does a bad job he always makes it up to you one way or another. In all honesty, he’s probably already hired people to do that (forgot this man is inheriting a multi millionaire dollar corporation).

✮ Reo is however very good at taking care of children. Once he has a clear grasp of their needs, he finds it to be really enjoyable and fulfilling. He takes a lot of pride in whatever happiness and comfort he can bring to his kids. He hates the sound of his babies crying, not because it’s annoying (though he complains about that too) but because it genuinely hurts his soul. He can be a bit too worrisome about it sometimes - he’s totally the type of person to look up his child’s symptoms and freak out over seeing all the worst case scenarios.

✮ The one thing that reo particularly excels at is taking care of you when you’re sick. He can always tell when you’re not feeling your best and he immediately harps on you. He doesn’t know how to cook very well but he knows how to make a few different kinds of warm foods to fill your stomach and give you a little energy. He’d absolutely refuse to stay away from you (unless it was a seriously contagious illness or if you guys had a baby that could’ve gotten sick). Doesn’t care if you’re sneezing and coughing and wheezing, he wants to feed you and hold you and kiss your hot head until it cools down and everything is better again. His goal is always to make sure you get better as soon as possible and won’t let you do anything but rest and relax until then.

✮ Reo is an incredible gift giver! I’ve certainly mentioned this in another hc post, but he is always out and about buying you little things that remind him of you. If you guys have a kid that’s just more gifts he’ll have to get and the thought of that honestly excites him.

✮ Anything can happen but…reo with a daughter…guys….

✮ he would be the sweetest girl dad! would do everything in his power to make her believe she’s an actual princess and he’s just one of her loyal servants. Spoils her rotten and doesn’t feel bad about it.

✮ You’d have to explain to him how this could negatively affect your daughter and it would break his heart. He’d go into theatrics trying to refute it because “What do you mean I can’t let her have everything she wants?” and “What if she cries? You want me to make my daughter cry?” he gets it eventually, but remains reluctant lol.

✮ He’d love playing sports with his kids. Would try to get them into soccer but if they end up liking another sport he’s still just as hype. Isn’t initially familiar with the concept of letting the kids win but soon realized he has to level with the speed of their little legs.

✮ I don’t have any specific hc’s for him as a boy dad but he’d be just as great of course - he’d make sure his son sees how women should be treated based on how he treats you!

✮ If he could find a way to make you the total world ruler he would because he truly believes you’re the most capable person. He’s the kind of husband who lets you run things for the most part but is always there to step in when you need a break or if you just want him by your side. Would call for an emergency flight back home from whatever country he’s training in just because you said you didn’t wanna go to parent teacher night alone.

✮ He loves doing mundane tasks with you, but always tries to “make it a bit more fun” as he says - which basically means he puts away the clothes you fold while you listen to him crack really bad jokes at you, gossip about his teammates, or try to sing and serenade you with his MANY playlists he’s made dedicated to you. On days you both have nothing going on he follows you around the house like a lost puppy, which is slightly annoying but it also means you have four hands to do stuff because he’s a participator above all else.

✮ Reo always makes sure to show his appreciation for how hard you work whether it’s at your job, taking care of the kids/house, or both. He takes time alone with you very seriously, even as your lives get busier and your family grows he always makes sure there’s time for the two of you to just be together and be in love. Always jokes about how you guys need to keep the romance going. He has small romantic gestures that he indulges you in throughout the day: kissing you on the cheek, brushing your hair out of your face/tying it back for you if you if you need (taking his hair tie out for you to use), hugging you a little tighter just before you get up, running a bath for the both of you, massaging your shoulders while you talk.

to be fully honest with you guys, i have never in my life wanted to have kids so it was a bit hard for me to imagine what being happy with children would be like LMAO but alas i did my best. stay safe and stay cool. - aria :3

[propertyofyoutube]

Hey girl heyyyyyyyy it’s me again! Your writing is so amazing I will never get over it! You always have me kicking my feet and blushing!!!

So I have another Sam x Colby x Reader idea!

So I’ve been seeing a lot of “reader squirts for the first time” fics and they all end with the person saying they are going to make them do it again and that’s where it cuts off (don’t get me wrong I love these fics still!) but I always crave more and wish they would keep going and make the reader keep going soooooo the wheels in my brain got to turning

I was thinking the reader hasn’t been able to get herself to squirt after she did it once while masturbating and has been bummed out cause she’s been trying to do it again and the boys are more than willing to help get her there again and again and maybeeee again 😝 (genuinely just pure “our girl” love, overstimulation, squirting filth)

Again I love you’re writing and I hope you’re having the best day you amazing human being!!!!

Let it go, baby - EXPLICIT

WARNINGS: SMUT 18+, Complete and utter filth!! Squirting (lots of it) overstimulation, oral both male and female, use of sex toys, penetration, rough and hard sex, swallowing, bad language, masturbation, plus a lot of love and fluff and care.

Not edited.

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"Come on..." you panted as you pumped your fingers in and out, as fast as you possibly could as the sound of moans echoed through your phone.

You shut your eyes tight, as you felt your second orgasm just inches away, your stomach twisting and your legs shaking. 'This is it...' you thought as you curled your fingers, your arm becoming extremely tired. Your friend recently told you about how she 'soaked' the place one night with her new boyfriend, and it instantly reminded you of that one time, many years ago where you managed to squirt. For the first and only time. Yes that's right, only time. You'd tried, so many times you couldn't keep count to make yourself feel that relief once again. And tonight, you almost had it.

"Come on! Come on! Yes, yes, yes!" You cried out as your second orgasm hit, and.... Wait for it.... It's coming... nothing.

"Fuck!" You groaned out , a groan full of frustration and exhaustion more than anything. You stared at the ceiling wanting to scream. Maybe you just weren't capable of squirting anymore. But damn, that feeling was like something else and you just wanted that explosion of pleasure once again. Tonight just wasn't the night but it affected you more this time. You'd had enough, normally once you put your mind to something, it wasn't too hard for you to achieve it. So why was this so hard for you to do!

You took a deep breath before shutting down the porn that still blasted through your phone. You headed into the bathroom to take a leak and freshen up. As your phone laid on your bed the dull buzzing sound of Sam calling you was drowned out by the sound of your running faucet.

You felt so deflated. Granted, it wasn't such a big deal, but it had been such a long time you'd been trying, you just felt annoyed more than anything.

As you headed back into your bedroom, you picked your phone to see the missed call, "oh fuck..." you sighed once again. You instantly began calling him back.

"Hey baby!" Sam said, cheery as ever, down the phone.

"Heyy..." you said with a sweet tone trying to hide your deflation. Sam could see right through you.

"Woah, what's going on?" Sam spoke quickly, his voice riddled with concern.

You sighed, feeling so ridiculous for the way you were feeling right now, "it's nothing babe, don't worry."

Sam let out a small exhale down the phone before replying softly, "okay baby... well Colby will be finishing his meeting in 30 minutes so do you want me to pick you up now?" He asked.

You couldn't help but smile a little knowing you'll be back with your two favourite boys in no time, "yes please... I'm ready whenever." You replied as you quickly began to gather your essentials for a sleepover at their house.

"That's my girl... be there in five." Sam said as you smiled, "and hey, keep smiling." He quickly added before putting the phone down. You stopped for a moment as you took in the sincerity in his voice. He always worried about you, Colby too.

Sam wasn't lying as five minutes later there was a knock on your door. Your mood lifting slightly just at the sight of him, waiting patiently for you as you opened up the door.

"There's our beautiful girl." He said with the brightest smile.

"Hi..." you say softly with a smirk as you stepped outside, Sam instantly taking your bag from you so you could close the door.

Sam looked at you with a smile as you locked up, he was trying so hard to hide his concern for you. “So, I thought we could head to McDonalds and get some food and then head to pick up Colby…” He said giving you a smile as if it were a question.

You turned to look at Sam as you nodded, still that annoyed pit in your stomach you just couldn’t shake, “sounds great babe.”

Sam nodded in return as he smiled, but his eyes were showing nothing but worry for you. He hoped once you were settled you’d feel comfortable enough to tell them what has upset you.

Sam placed your bag in the trunk as you climbed into the passenger seat. You buckled up trying not to be a mood killer… you took a deep breath before turning to smile at Sam as he climbed into the car.

Sam always smiled back, uncontrollably as your smile warmed his heart more than anything. That’s why he hated it when you wouldn’t tell him what was wrong, but he never pushed. He just made it his mission to make you feel happy, and he knew Colby felt the exact same way. “Ready, princess?” Sam said with a smirk as he buckled up.

“For McDonald’s? Always” you giggled back.

Sam smiled even wider at your comment as he opened up his phone to put on some music, “that’s my girl.” He said with a smile as he glanced at you. Suddenly your favourite song began to play through the speakers of the Tesla as you glanced at Sam giving him a seriously look. “What?” Sam teased with a smirk, “I know you love it.”

You rolled your eyes starting to notice the small things he was doing in an attempt to cheer you up. “I’m fine Sam!” You laughed.

Sam held his hands up defensively, “woah I never said you weren’t.” He teased back with a smirk, “am I not allowed to listen to a song that just happens to be your favourite song?” He asked as he leaned closer before kissing your cheek sweetly.

You rolled your eyes once more as you playfully pushed him away, even though you wouldn’t admit to your feelings right now, Sam was definitely cheering you up.

After grabbing food for the three of you from the drive through at McDonalds, you looked out the window as Sam approached the building where Colby’s meeting was held. You suddenly frowned as you leant forward squinting as you saw in the distance Colby, holding a huge bunch of your favourite flowers. You looked at Sam confused and back out the window as he smiled to myself. “Is he for real?” You asked Sam with a chuckle.

“Okay… maybe I called Colby and told him you might not be feeling so great today… I am not responsible for his actions.” Sam said with a chuckle and a smirk.

“Sam, baby, I told you I’m fine!” You said back with another laugh.

Sam rolled his eyes slightly, “y/n… do you seriously think that I believe you when you’re saying that!” He said chuckling as he glanced at you, whilst he pulled up beside Colby.

You looked at Colby through the window and you saw his cheeky grin as he climbed into the car behind Sam.

You turned your head to look back at Colby, your mouth still dropped open as he exhaled dramatically carefully trying to sit down and not get the flowers caught. Once he closed the door he looked at you with a smirk, “hey baby.” He chuckled as he leaned forward kissing your cheek. “We thought you might like some flowers today…” he said with a warm smile as he held them towards you.

“Hmm..” you said crossing your arms glancing at him, “and why is that Colbs?” You asked raising your eyebrows.

Colby looked at you both confused and almost like he was guilty of a crime he didn’t know he committed as he quickly realised what you were doing. Hiding how you were really feeling. “No reason, just because we love you.” He said smugly, his cheeky grin returning.

You sighed slightly, but the flowers were truly so beautiful and they did make you feel that little bit better once again. “I’m fine…” you said with a smile as you leaned forward to smell them. “But thank you. Both of you, and I love you too.” Both Sam and Colby smiled warmly at you as Sam began the drive back to their place.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Just as you finished up eating your McDonald’s, Colby suddenly paused the TV as they both turned to look at you in the corner of the sofa. Your eyes fell wide as you looked at them nervously, “what I do?” You said in a sheepish cute voice.

Colby sighed as Sam tilted his head placing his hand on your thigh. Sam began to speak softly, “okay baby… you had a nice drive listening to your favourite songs, you got flowers and you’ve been fed…” you looked at Sam knowing exactly where he was going with this. “So… are you going to tell us what’s going on now?” He asked, genuinely concerned.

You looked between him and Colby as they both awaited your answer. You chuckled nervously as you looked around the room, “Sammy, Colbs, honestly… I’m fine, it’s nothing. You really don’t have to worry and you definitely didn’t need to do all of this.”

“Baby, it’s never nothing… something has clearly upset you or something, we just… we just wanna help.” Colby said his voice filled with love and care.

You looked at Colby as you chewed the inside of your mouth. This was the first time you’d ever felt truly embarrassed, ashamed of how you were feeling because of something that you thought was so ridiculous. “It’s nothing.. it’s honestly… it’s stupid, and it’s… embarrassing.” You said quietly as you looked down chuckling nervously.

“Hey no, nothing is stupid or embarrassing.” Colby said as he gently lifted your head up by your chin. “You can talk to us, y/n…”

“About anything…” Sam added with a smile.

“Fine.” You said in the end knowing they would never leave it. You took a deep breath as you chuckled nervously to yourself, “okay… I was annoyed earlier because…” you sighed again ready for the laughs to start. But Sam and Colby weren’t laughing, they were eagerly waiting to find out what has been bothering you all day. “Because… I can’t squirt anymore…” you said immediately looking down as you felt your cheeks instantly flush.

Sam and Colby both paused as they looked at you for a moment and then both of their eyes met silently communicating as small smirks appeared on their faces.

“And I’m presuming you tried this morning and it… didn’t go well?” Sam asked as he rubbed your thigh.

You lifted your head to look at him kind of shocked that neither of them were laughing right now. “Uh… yeah…” you said nervously as you turned to look at Colby.

“You know baby…. You could have just asked.” Colby said as he glanced at you. There it was, that look in his eyes that he only had when something great was about to go down.

“What?” You said a little lost for words and shocked.

“Yeah… and if you’d have told me this morning… we would have had this problem fixed much sooner.” Sam added as you quickly turned your head to look in his direction.

“What do you mean?” You asked nervously as you looked between the both of them.

Colby and Sam chuckled slightly as Colby suddenly leaned forward, his mouth grazing across your ear as he whispered, “why don’t we go fix it now?”

The sound of his voice, that low and seductive tone, sent shivers down your spine. “I- I uh” you stuttered as they both smirked.

Suddenly they both stood up off the sofa as they both held a hand out for you, “you coming?” Sam said with a suggestive smirk.

You stared at them for a moment before nodding slowly taking their hands as they helped you up. Colby began to lead the way to the bedroom as Sam whispered into your ear, “don’t worry baby… we’ll take care of you.” The low gravel to his voice made your heart pound in anticipation and your heat twitch.

As Colby reached the bedroom, he stepped aside letting Sam guide you into the room as he closed the door. Sam turned you to face him as suddenly leaned in slowly, his lips grazing against yours, “you said you can’t squirt?” He spoke in a low whisper as you looked up at him seeing the change in his eyes and you nodded slowly. Sam smirked as he moved his lips to graze across your entire cheek slowly until he reached your ear. Goosebumps being left covering your entire body, “we’ll see about that.” He whispered directly down your ear as you closed your eyes gasping slightly. Suddenly his hands gently gripped the bottom of your shirt, “arms up.” He demanded as you quickly lifted them into the air and he wasted no time pulling your shirt up and over your head. Colby suddenly walked by as he took in your appearance with a smirk, holding a towel in his hand.

“What are you-“ you went to speak to him but Sam suddenly grabbed your face pulling you back to him as he smacked his lips onto yours in a deep and passionate kiss. His tongue began to explore your mouth, his hand wrapping into your hair to pull you closer.

Colby suddenly came up behind you as his fingers moved around your hips and he unbuttoned your shorts before lopping his fingers into the waist band of both your short and underwear and he slowly began to pull them down before he hit the floor. “Step out baby.” Colby said his voice laced with desire. You suddenly took a step closer to Sam, causing Sam to step back slightly, his lips never leaving yours. “Good girl.” Colby’s voice echoed from below, causing your legs to tremble slightly as you groaned into Sam’s mouth.

As Colby slowly raised to his feet behind you, Sam suddenly pulled away as you both tried to catch your breath, but he suddenly spun your around where you were came face to face with Colby just inches away, catching you by surprise. You looked at Colby your legs already growing weaker as he stood before, naked, and already hard just from the sight of you. Your heat dripped in anticipation as Colby suddenly pulled you to him connecting his lips with yours in a much more desperate and erratic kiss than Sam’s. His kiss was filled with a need to taste you. Sam took a step back as he began to undress himself. His eyes staying glued to the back of your body as he saw Colby slowly reach around and skilfully unclasp your bra with just a pinch of his fingers.

As Colby’s kiss deepened, he slowly dragged his hands up your sides until he reached your arms, guiding them to wrap around his head as he mumbled into your mouth, “hold on tight baby..” and before you could responded he suddenly took a hand as he dragged it up between your thighs causing you to step out wider and his fingers instantly found your clit, like metal being attracted to a magnet.

You gasped as your legs twitched, your tight grip around his head and shoulders squeezing slightly to keep you steady as his fingers began to rub intensely. “Oh… fuck,” you mumbled into his mouth as he smirked into the kiss. Colby suddenly pulled back out of breath as he rested his forehead against yours, “we need you to cum for us baby… every time… got it?” Colby said sternly his voice deep and lustful.

You squeezed your eyes tight as you nodded, nothing but the sound of your moans filling the room. Sam watched as you crumbled at Colby’s touch heading over to a dresser where he pulled open a draw grabbing some essentials for this occasion. He smirked, knowing just how soaked this room was about to become.

Suddenly Colby took his two fingers pushing them deep into your core as your eyes snapped open as, the only thing keeping you up being your arms still tightly wrapped around him. He began to quickly pump them in and out, curling them as he hit your spot every time. “Oh… fuck… c-Colby…” you gasped between moans as you clenched around his fingers.

“You’re close baby… I can feel it.” Colby groaned as he moved his hand quicker, his lips finding yours once again to swallow your moans.

Suddenly Sam came up behind you, his hands snaking around your body as he found your breasts, his fingers moving across your nipples as he began to massage them, his grip getting tighter as they felt you begin to shake, your legs struggling to hold you up. Colby pulled away from your lips as he moved his hand more aggressively, your first orgasm just inches away. You flung your head back as you hit Sam’s shoulder. His lips began to kiss and suck along your neck as he made his way up to your ear, “cum for Colby baby… that’s a good girl.”

That was it, your orgasm hit full swing, “holy fuck!” You called out as both Sam and Colby held you up in place as Colby’s pace slowed down to ride out your high, your body crumbled wedged between them. Colby slowly removed his hand with a smirk as you tried to catch your breath, Sam’s arms wrapped tightly around you as you opened your eyes to look at Colby.

Colby smirked his eyes dark with desire, “that’s just the beginning baby… on the bed.” He demanded as Sam moved you forward before turning you to face him with a smirk and pushing you gently back onto the bed. Your heart pounded as your back hit the sheets, your breath heavy as you looked at them both stood at the bottom of the bed, devouring you with their eyes. Tonight was all about you. Sam and Colby communicated silently before Sam suddenly grabbed your legs pulling you closer to the edge of the bed. You gasped at the suddenly movement but your eyes fell wide as he dropped to his knees between your legs. Colby moved to the side of you his hand slowly starting to stroke his cock as he admired you lying on the bed, your chest rising and falling from the passion that still radiated through your body.

Sam looked up at you as his hands slowly dragged up your entire legs, until he began to rub your thighs. “You sure you want this baby? Because once we start, we aren’t stopping until we’re all completely soaked.” Your eyes fell wid once again as you gasped trying to calm your excitement and nerves. You bit your lip for a moment before nodding unsure what to expect.

“That’s our girl.” Colby said with a groan as he moved closer to you. Sam and Colby gave one last nod of acknowledgment before Sam suddenly moved forward slowly kissing along your inner thigh as your body naturally began to move needing him, needing his mouth where you wanted him most. Sam chuckled at you squirming before he gave you what you wanted, leaning forward as he took his tongue slowly dragging it up your entire heat.

“Oh… Sammy.” You moaned out as he tasted every inch of you. Just as he began to move his mouth against your clit, your hands instantly moved to grab his hair. Colby suddenly grabbed your wrist as your eyes snapped open in shock and you turned your head to the side to look at him.

“Now baby… why don’t we out that pretty little hand of yours to better use?” He suggested, with a hint of demand in his voice as he slowly took your hand placing it around his cock and he began to move it against him. “That’s it.” He groaned as he looked down at your scrunched up face as Sam worked his magic. Just as you began to move your hand up and down Colby’s shaft suddenly Sam stuck two fingers deep inside of you as you moaned out louder. The sight of you coming undone for Sam was addictive for Colby. His eyes widening as you arched your back on the bed, the sound of Sam’s name leaving your lips as he gave you everything you need. Suddenly you began to clench around Sam’s fingers as you looked down at him, the sight alone almost sending you over the edge.

“Sammy…I… I’m gonna-“ you tried to speak but the overwhelming sense of an orgasm just inches away once again was in control of your breath.

“Cum baby,” Colby spoke his own voice shaking as he felt pleasure radiating through his body, your hand slowed down as you were being consumed by Sam’s fingers and mouth but he didn’t care, this was so fucking hot to him.

Suddenly Sam groaned against you as it vibrated against your clit, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as your high hit full speed once again. Your legs shook as you tried to pull your knees together, “fuck Sam!” You cried out but Sam didn’t slow down. He moved his mouth away his fingers still pumping as suddenly you heard a clicking sound followed by the sound of vibrations as you tried to open your eyes but your orgasm was so intense and Sam was not giving you a chance to recover. He suddenly pressed the vibrator directly on your clit as his fingers pumped in and out, curling up to hit your g-spot, your orgasm still raging through your body as you suddenly contracted in your stomach, the stimulation overpowering as your head lifted off the bed, your knees lifting higher towards your face as your breath got caught in your throat. “S-Sa-mmy” you tried to speak but you couldn’t, just a quiet squeal pushed through your throat as you felt your legs shaking vigorously. Suddenly you felt it, you felt the build up, like you wanted to explode, wanted to release in a whole new way. But you felt scared, fear of unknown. Not knowing what you would feel. Sam could feel the tension in your pussy as Colby saw it on your face, they knew you were holding it in. The vibrations became more intense as Sam used his whole arm to finger fuck you like never before.

“Let it go, baby…” Sam’s voice echoed into your ears as your body remained scrunched up.

Colby leaned down next to your head as he spoke low and demanding, “let it go, y/n.”

You remained scrunched up, your brain was spinning from the overwhelming sensation. Sam was not letting you give up now as he suddenly turned up the speed of the vibrator, your mouth fell wide as your breath became non existent once again, “I said fucking let go!” Sam growled his voice stern.

And with that… here it was. Suddenly your head threw back against the bed, “oh fuckkkk!” You screamed out as Sam smirked biting his lip, feeling the warmth around his fingers. He suddenly dropped the vibrator and quickly removed his fingers as he took his whole hand rubbing quickly against your whole core as you finally let go. Your juices squirted out powerfully as you completely soaked Sam who let out a deep, guttural moan.

“Fuck…” Colby groaned as he watched your juices dripping all over Sam, your screams filling the room as your body shook violently. “Good girl. That’s it.”

Sam suddenly took his mouth and completely sucked up everything dripping from your heat as your back arched again. “Oh… fuck… Sam!” You moaned loudly as you tried so hard to catch your breath, your head spinning from the lightheadedness.

Suddenly Colby spoke, “our turn.” He groaned deep into your ear before both he and Sam quickly stood up swapping places.

Your eyes fell wide, you weren’t sure if you take anymore, but fuck, this was by far the most amazing sexual experience of your life.

As Colby stood between your legs, he suddenly grabbed them as he pushed your knees up, giving himself as much access as possible, and knowing exactly what to do so he could be soaked in you too.

Colby didn’t give much time to recover as he looked at you, a dark desire and hunger in his eyes as he began to rub your extremely sensitive clit with his dick.

“C-Colby.” You gasped as you tried to lift your head up but Sam suddenly pushed you back down.

“Oh no baby, you’ve done enough talking… just let go.” Sam said as his hand stroked through your hair. “But that mouth to good use, princess.” He said softly as you turned your head to face him, his cock eagerly desperate to feel your mouth around it. Just as you opened your mouth to let Sam in, he positioned him as did Colby before they both pushed into you in union.

“Oh… fuck.” Sam groaned.

“Fuck y/n…” Colby groaned.

Your eyes fell wide as you felt as though your orgasm never ended with no cool down times. Sam because to push his dick in and out of your mouth as Colby instantly began to pound into your soaking wet, throbbing core. Within a minute, the room filled with their moans, your moans vibrating against Sam’s dick, you felt it again. But this time, you had no power, no energy left to fight against it.

Colby suddenly let out a low guttural moan as he felt the warmth start to surround his cock as he pounded a couple more time before pulling out suddenly as your juices squirted all over him again. “Fuck yes baby girl… that’s it.” He praised as Sam pulled out his dick, your scream filling the room so you could catch your breath.

After a second, Colby instantly pushed back deep inside you as he fucked you, harder and harder with each thrust. His movements not slowing down anytime soon.

You moaned loudly as you reopened your mouth for Sam. He quickly reinserted his cock back into your mouth, curse words and praises constantly pouring out of his mouth.

Colby suddenly grabbed the vibrator turning it on once again as he connected it with your clit, his cock fucking you harder than ever.

So this was overstimulation, you felt your eyes roll to the back of your head as your body grew weaker and weaker, your legs shaking, your pussy throbbing and burning from the immense amount of pleasure.

Colby groaned deeply as his dick filled you entirely, “come on baby.. I wanna taste you.”

The sound of his voice completely sent another wave of orgasm through your body as he felt that warmth once again and the clenching of your walls growing weaker as he suddenly pulled out, dropping the vibrator as he dropped down, connecting his mouth with your core and quickly inserting two fingers.

“Oh…. Fuckkkk,” you groaned, mumbled by Sam’s cock filling your mouth. Suddenly you began to squirt for the third time tonight, directly onto Colby’s face and mouth as he relished in the feel of your juices covering him. The taste of you as he swallowed everything in his mouth. Sam pulled out his cock to let you scream and catch your breath.

“Fuck baby…” Colby groaned out of breath as he sucked up your core, cleaning up anything he can. He slowly looked up at you out of breath as your weak body laid on the bed. “Are you okay baby?”

You nodded weakly your breath extremely heavy.

“Do you need to stop, or do you think you have enough to get us over the edge?” Sam asked with a smirk.

You fluttered your eyes open to look at Sam and without saying anything you opened your mouth for him, showing him they can carry on.

Colby and Sam smiled at each other, mesmerised by their girls stamina and resilience. “I promise baby, not much longer.” Colby groaned as he and Sam suddenly themselves back inside of you.

“That’s it princess,” Sam groaned deeply as you worked you sucked his cock amazingly, his hand tangling into your hair as you felt him beginning to twitch.

Colby was becoming completely consumed by the feel of your core wrapped around his dick, “fuck… baby… you feel so good.” He groaned out as he quickly began to twitch too.

Sam looked at Colby his breath heavy, “together?”

“Fuck yeah,” Colby groaned through gritted teeth as they both turned their attention back to you. Colby pounded into you deep and harder as Sam face fucked you until you gagged onto his dick.

“N-now Colby!” Sam moaned desperately as they both couldn’t hold back anymore. Colby let out a low guttural moan as Sam pulled out of your mouth and spilled his cum all over your chest. The sight of his cum hitting your tits sent Colby flying over the edge.

“Oh…f-..shit!” Colby groaned loudly as he pulled out, his cum covering your pussy.

Suddenly, everything went still, apart from the sounds of heavy breathing as slight groans coming from all three of you. Once Sam and Colby composed themselves, their bodies shaking as they could hear their own heartbeats pounding.

You laid there trying to catch your breath, not moving a muscle as your eyes remained closed.

Sam stroked your hair catching his breath.

Colby gently rubbed his hands lovingly up and down your thighs as he spoke breathlessly, “baby… are you okay?”

You didn’t reply for a moment as you tried so hard not to pass out from the overstimulation.

Sam looked at you concerned as Colby’s eyes widened, “y/n?” Sam said with a hint of urgency to his voice.

“I’m…I’m…” you began to speak your breath so weak and heavy. “I’m okay…” you managed to breathe out as you weakly lifted your hand giving them a thumbs up.

“Oh fuck… scared me then sweetheart,” Colby said with a chuckle as he dropped his head down. All of them feeling weak and exhausted.

Sam chuckled with relief as he lowered next your head placing a soft kiss on your cheek, “what do you need, baby?” He said softly his hand still stroking your hair, “do you want to sleep in your own room tonight?” He asked, knowing sometimes she liked downtime alone after an intense fucking.

You shook your head slowly. Sam nodded as he glanced up at Colby. “Okay baby, who do you want to stay with tonight?”

Colby smiled as he felt as though he knew what you were going to say, he’s only ever seen you seem like needy once, and after tonight, it was completely expected.

“Both…” you whispered back.

Colby and Sam both chuckled, “okay baby…” Colby said softly, “why don’t you let Sam get you cleaned up and take you to bed in his room and I’ll follow along once I’ve cleaned up here?” He said as he kissed your thigh softly.

You nodded weakly once again, your body completely and utterly well spent. Sam smiled as he kissed your forehead softly, “come on then princess, let’s go take a quick shower okay?” Colby moved aside to allow Sam to pick you up bridal style.

Sam stood beside Colby as Colby leaned over kissing your head, “have fun y/n… I’ll see you soon baby.”

You nodded as you spoke in barely a whisper, “I love you both…”

Sam and Colby looked at each other as they both smiled.

“I love you too sweetheart” Colby said kissing your head once again.

“I love you baby.” Sam smiled as he squeezed you tighter.

Sam carried you out of the room to get showered and ready for bed, as Colby looked at the soaked towel and bedsheets as he chuckled to himself, “well damn.. that towel was a waste of time…”

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Authors note: holy shit.. I quite frankly think this is my favourite thing I’ve ever written and I’m not usually a both a once kinda girl but DAMNNN! I hope you liked it! Requests are open!🖤

[brattyfork]

i haven’t

summary: matt feels insecure still being a virgin, his best friend helps him out

warnings: sex obviously, matt being kind of a sub, nothing super crazy, very long tho sorry

i havent 💚3

matt and i have been best friends since high school, he was always more of the shy one in our friendship. this resulted in us having two very different high school experiences, i had the very stereotypical “ideal” experience, parties, drinking, sex, all the lame school dances, football games, you name it, i probably did it. matt, however, had almost the complete opposite, unfortunately his anxiety usually got the best of him and he ended up hanging out with a few close friends (including me) and his brothers, which was still super fun but he stayed in his comfort zone. i convinced matt, with chris’ help, to come to a few parties but aside from getting high once he didn’t really participate in them. all of this to say, i was pretty experienced while matt was a sober virgin. i know that sounds harsh but it never bothered me or him as far as i knew. i obviously wanted to have fun with my best friend but it never distanced us, it was his choice and i respected it.

this brings us to now, i’m 20 and living with matt and his two triplet brothers. matt had come out of his shell a considerable amount but still never felt the need to do anything crazy.

we were sitting in our living room bored out of our minds when nick suggested we play a game. i suggested truth or dare but none of us wanted to get up so chris said we should play never have i ever. nick made fun of him for picking something so middle school but no one had any better ideas so we went with it.

it started out pretty tame, “nhie pooped my pants” “nhie cried at school” “nhie fallen down the stairs” before chris raised the stakes. “nhie kissed someone” i was confused why he asked this because we all had and we all knew that. i put my finger down, turning to matt who was red in the face and realized why chris asked.

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senior year, matt was feeling really bad about not having had his first kiss before he graduated high school. he was complaining and moping so much that i finally suggested i could be his first kiss. he turned beet red and began asking me a dozen questions.

“won’t it be weird?”

“not if we don’t make it weird”

“what if i’m bad?”

“you can’t really be bad at it, plus if you were i wouldn’t care”

“are you sure about this?”

“yeah if it’ll make you stop sulking in self pity”

he rolled his eyes at me, “you’re not gonna make fun of me are you?”

i tilted my head at him, “matt, have i ever genuinely made fun of you?” he shook his head.

“just close your eyes, i’ll take the lead”

he took a deep breath before closing his eyes. i leaned over, a little nervous myself, took his face in my hands and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. he kissed back for a moment before i pulled away, him subconsciously chasing my lips. it was actually one of the nicest kisses i’ve ever had, his lips were soft and he was gentle, most guys just tried to eat my face. once we had both pulled back and opened our eyes we started giggling which turned into stomach-churning laughter. we just couldn’t help it, it was funny. we didn’t talk about it anymore after that, other than him updating his brothers on what had happened.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

chris could be a dick sometimes, giving his brothers a hard time and unfortunately, matt was an easy target. i kicked chris’ leg, giving him a stern look.

“ow! what the hell dude?”

“don’t be a dick”

we moved on, more questions about embarrassing things and a few rounds later it was chris’ turn again.

“nhie had sex” chris giggled

chris and i put a finger down, while nick and matt’s stayed up.

“did someone slip asshole pills into your pepsi?”

they all chuckled at my comment, but it wasn’t really a joke.

“i think we should quit while we’re ahead, are you guys hungry?” they all nodded. nick and chris began bickering about where we should eat while we were all getting our shoes on.

“do you wanna drive or do you want me to?” i asked matt

“i don’t care” he didn’t sound angry, more defeated

“okay, i can drive” i gave him a soft smile.

we loaded into the car, nick taking his usual spot in the back. chris tried to sit up front, he normally sat there when matt drove and sometimes when i did. i shot him a glare, him letting out a sigh and scooting in next to nick. matt took his seat in the front, sometimes he would ask for aux but he just went on his phone and said nothing. chris chimed in from the back.

“can i…?” he asked referring to the music, i nodded my head at him, seeing as i didn’t wanna pick anything and matt was occupied.

we decided on a coney island, wanting to sit down opposed to getting fast food. we got a booth, chris and nick sitting across from matt and i. matt was particularly quiet tonight and i could tell something was wrong. i noticed he was twiddling his thumbs in his lap and quickly grabbed his hand, interlacing our fingers and resting our hands on his thigh. this was normal for us, we held hands sometimes when one of us noticed the other was stressed. he looked up from his lap and gave me a small smile before slowly joining the conversation. matt seemed to be acting like his normal self again but i could tell something was still bothering him.

we finished our food and made our way back to the house, chris and nick decided to retire to bed while matt and i weren’t super tired yet. we grabbed a few snacks before heading to my room, which was on the first floor while the boys’ were on the second, mainly so we didn’t have to worry about waking up nick and chris.

we turned on adventure time and matt rested his head on my lap while we both scrolled aimlessly through our phones. after about two episodes, matt put his phone down and just stared at the ceiling.

“are you good?” i asked, concerned about his strange behavior.

“when did you lose your virginity?”

i was taken a back by his question but answered nonetheless.

“uhh summer after sophomore year i think”

he didn’t say anything.

“why do you ask?”

“do you think it’s weird i’m still a virgin?”

“no matt, not at all”

“i think it’s weird”

“do you think it’s weird that nick is a virgin?”

“no but he’s at least done stuff, all i’ve done is kissed you, no offense”

i giggled, “none taken matty, the time just hasn’t been right yet. you’ll meet a girl and hit it off, you’ll know.”

“yeah…” he trailed off, like he had more to say.

“you know you can tell or ask me anything right?”

“if you don’t want to, you can tell me to fuck off and we can forget this ever happened…” he paused for a moment “w-would you have sex with me?”

“are you sure you want to? we don’t have to do anything you don’t want”

“yes i want to, i’m sick of being a 20 year old virgin” he chuckled. i let out a few giggles too before our laughter died down.

when i looked at him now, his eyes were dark with need and desperation. i took his face in my hands and pulled him into a deep kiss. i hadn’t had a kiss like matt’s since senior year, i tried to push it out of my head but it was hard. it was like fireworks were going off inside my head when our lips touched, i had never felt that with anyone else.

the kiss got more heated, i wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself onto his lap, causing him to whimper at the pressure. i smiled into the kiss, his noises giving me more confidence as i ground my hips into his lap. he almost completely pulled away from the kiss as a desperate whine escaped his lips. i smiled at him before making my way to his neck, placing wet kisses along it up to his ear.

“i love the noises you make” i whispered before sucking a purple mark into his neck, more beautiful sounds leaving his lips while his hands trailed down to my ass, pulling me into him.

i came back to his face kissing him again before bringing my hands to the hem of his shirt and pulling it over his head. i then took off my shirt and bra so he wouldn’t feel so exposed. his eyes bore into my chest, his mouth hung open as if he wanted to say something.

“you gotta use your words to get what you want matty..” i teased him.

“c-can i touch you?” he asked, moving his hands up towards my boobs.

“of course you can, such a polite boy”

he blushed before placing his cold hands over my breasts, causing me to shiver. i kissed him while he played with my boobs, gaining more confidence and playing with my nipples. i let out a moan that was swallowed into the kiss before i pushed him onto the bed, leaving me on top of him.

i quickly got up off of him before taking off my leggings and moving to pull down his pants. he protested slightly, causing me to pull away before he spoke.

“can i make you feel good?”

“you will baby, i’m gonna take care of you right now tho, just relax” he let out a deep breath, giving into my instructions. i crawled up to his lap, palming him over his boxers before placing kisses up his shaft over the fabric. he began squirming under me when i decided to take his boxers off. he wasn’t huge but a decent size: proportional in length and width. i licked my lips, excited to have him inside me before taking him in my hand and licking a strip up the underside of his dick. he jumped a bit at the new feeling before letting out a loud groan from my warm tongue on his cock. i licked up the side of him before finally taking him into my mouth, sucking on the tip lightly causing him to buck his hips into me. he shot me an apologetic look while i took the rest of him in my mouth, the tip of his dick hitting the back of my throat. he gasped, all the air leaving his lungs as i began to bob up and down on him.

“holy fucking shit” he whimpered. i couldn’t help but giggle around him, the vibration causing him to buck up again. i continued sucking him, swirling my tongue around his dick until i felt him twitch in my mouth. i pulled off, followed by a loud whine of protest coming from him.

“mmm i was close” he pouted.

“don’t you wanna cum inside me?” his eyes lit up at the suggestion before nodding his head. i climbed up him, planning to ride him before he stopped me.

“um, can i do something to you?”

“you wanna finger me sweet boy?” he quickly nodded his head making me chuckle again at his eagerness. i grabbed his hand, pulling his pointer and middle finger out before taking them in my mouth, running my tongue all along them while keeping eye contact with the boy under me. i could feel his dick twitching under me, causing me to moan around his fingers. i pulled his fingers out of my mouth before moving them down to my pussy. he moved his fingers around, just getting a feeling for the area before stating “you’re so wet” i kissed him as he continued to feel me, rubbing his wet fingers on my clit making me moan into the kiss. he found his way to my entrance, pushing just at the beginning before stopping. i opened my eyes, realizing he was waiting for my consent. i nodded my head and he pushed one of his slender fingers into me, in turn pulling moans out of me. i moved to his ear. “you can put the other one in too” i whispered to him. he pushed the other in before i kissed him, pushing my tongue into his mouth and quickly dominating. he slowly got his footing, picking up his pace, my noises egging him on to repeat his actions. i felt myself nearing the edge, now grinding down onto his fingers. i pulled away from the kiss.

“fuck matty, you’re making me feel so good. please don’t stop” he said nothing but continued his motions until i fell into my orgasm, my legs shaking on his lap, still moving his fingers in and out of me. i had to grab his wrist for him to stop, not realizing he was overstimulating me.

“sorry” he murmured.

“you dont have to be sorry goof. you want me to ride you now?”

“yes please”

i spit on my hand, stroking him up and down a few times before lining him up at my entrance. i looked at him for approval, him nodding his head for me to slowly sink down. the noise he made when i pushed him into me is something i wish i could have on replay in my head for the rest of my life. like i said, he wasn’t huge but he filled me up in all the right places.

“fuck matt you feel so good”

“you’re so fucking tight holy god” i chuckled at his response, sitting there for a minute longer to let us both get used to the sensation.

“ready?” i looked to him, he nodded. i lifted myself up on my knees before sinking back down onto him. he placed his hands on my hipbones, helping guide me up and down while i bounced on his cock.

“hnng holy shit i think i’m close”

“me too baby, let go whenever you’re ready, i’ve got you” i reassured him, picking up my pace a bit, his whines getting more and more broken with every movement. before i knew it i could feel his hot cum coating my insides, sending me over the edge, fucking us both through our highs. once we both stopped twitching, i laid down on him, getting comfortable while he caught his breath.

“god i could stay here forever”

“we could sleep like this you know”

“are you sure?? is that sanitary?” i laughed at him.

“yes it’s fine matt, just go to sleep, i know you’re tired”

“as long as you’re comfortable, okay. goodnight, thank you for that”

“of course matty, goodnight” i said wrapping my arms around his neck and falling asleep with him inside me.

a/n: hi hope yall enjoyed :3 sorry the end is kinda rushed i didn’t rly know how to end it.

[zombieunicorngamerzu]

(Astarion x fem reader)

[Warnings - love confession, P-N-V, cream pie, lovemaking, marking, claiming, soft dom Astarion, sub reader ]

“How many times do I have to tell you Astarion, no!” You snapped for the upteenth time at Astarion’s desperate attempts to accept his advances, but not because you didn’t like him, it was actually the opposite… you loved him. That’s why you were trying so hard to keep him away, you were growing dangerous and unpredictable with the tadpole in your brain, it manipulated you into doing dangerous, evil things, and you were terrified of your impulses that you were getting weaker and weaker to control by the day. You were turning into a monster.

“Why not?!” He cried out with a usual fit, “Is it me? Because I really need to know if this is you just trying to play hard to get or if you genuinely hate me, it’s getting hard to tell, dear!” He waved his hands in the air in a defeated gesture, his expression softening slightly as he stepped closer, his tone softer, “Is it me?”

You looked at him with such a pained expression, you were so conflicted, so scared, you knew he wouldn’t give up unless you blatantly rejected him and even then he still might keep trying, but that wasn’t even it! You loved him… but you couldn’t risk hurting him, even if that meant loosing him In a way, and you knew if you told him what you actually thought he would never give up, but hearing him voice his insecurities of himself… thinking he’s the problem… when he’s not, nor could he ever, it broke your heart to see the look on his face as he awaited your answer. “No Astarion, it could never be you, there’s not a thing wrong with you that i dislike…”

“Oh don’t go and do the whole “it’s not you it’s me” phrase, don’t make ME feel guilty just because you don’t like the man I am, or what I am… just be honest if your disgusted by me, if you don’t trust me, if you fear me, but DO NOT LIE TO ME!” He cried out in a rare moment of vulnerability, he’s had this built up for as long as he could, but now he’s finally broke, “I’ve had enough of that in my life…” he spoke out so softly, his head drooping down as he frowned, trying not to tear up or let his voice crack. Gods… he loved you so much he would tear out his own heart right now if that’s what he needed to prove it. “Please Y/N… just give me a chance, I swear… i-i can change, I can be a better man, I-“ you had to cut him off.

“Astarion, enough!” You couldn’t bear to hear him speak like this, you didn’t want him to change, he was perfect. “I don’t want you to change a single thing about yourself…” Those words themselves seemed to shock him, his head leaning back just a little with a stunned, puppy dog-like look before he spoke, “Well then what is it?! Here I am bearing my heart and soul out to you and you just say, no? Without an explanation, I-I need more than that!” You were staring to tear up at this point, just dropping your head with a heartbreaking sigh that he caught, stepping closer as he took your hand, “Darling please… speak to me, whatever it is… just tell me and we’ll deal with it, together. I can handle whatever daddy issues or baggage you may have so just blurt it out!” He chuckled wearily, but he was concerned overall for you seeing how much you were struggling, he realized this was something more.

“I-I’m changing Astarion…” you spoke out with a shaky tone, your lip quivering as tears started to fall down your cheeks, “And I’m scared, I’m turning into something… dark, I can feel it growing every day, and I’m terrified I’m going to just- loose control, I-I feel like a monster, I don’t even think I’d realize if I was already one, but I can’t risk hurting you, killing you…” you spoke out your fears with such honesty, such vulnerability, you just decided to be honest, maybe you could console him and convince him to leave you after you voice your concerns. “Darling, you are far from a monster.” Astarion scoffed, chuckling as he leaned his head back, motioning his hand towards himself, “Y/N, if you are a monster… I-I must be… Lucifer reincarnated, the embodiment of evil! And even if you were a monster I would still love you, hell- if you start to get all growly and nippy, I-I’ll tie you up and feed you squirrels to sate your bloodthirsty hunger!” He blurted out making you burst out a few giggles through your tears, making him smile with pride at making you laugh.

He stepped closer again, inches from you as he rested his hands on your shoulders to rub soothingly, “Was this really all it was, just you scared to… hurt me?” He scoffed with a gentle tone, he was surprised and just dumbfounded. You just sighed and looked up into his eyes, such a beautiful brown, and the gentle expression on his face, the slight head tilt as he awaited your answer, it made your heart flutter at how gentle he was being. “Astarion, what if I-“ he put a finger to your lips, cutting you off, “No more what ifs. Do you love me?” He asked bluntly, staring into your soul with such a look of determination, he would not give up on you, no matter what. You lifted your eyes to meet his with a pained expression, quiet because you knew you did, you knew if you said yes, he wouldn’t never let you go, but if you said no, you know he would know you were lying, you both could see how much each other cared for one another, the amount of times you’ve come close to death just to have the other race to each others side with such fear in their eyes that the other would die before either of you got the chance to just confess your undying love.

“You know I do…” you nodded with your honest confession, making him smile with satisfaction, cupping your chin in his hand before he pulled you closer, “Then that is all I need to know, I get to choose how I live my life… not you, I get to make the decision to stay, to love you, I’ll deal with the consequences myself.” He spoke with such passion before tilting your face up, his face inches from yours with his eyes locked on yours, “Now may we stop this torturous foreplay and make love already?” He smiled so adorably, tilting his head, “May I kiss you and make you mine, love?” Those words made your heart beat alive you swore and all you could do in that moment was nod as the last few tears fell down your face, meeting him in a passionate love-felt kiss.

Astarion’s arms wrapping around you protectively to cradle your body closer as he deepened the kiss, his hand cupping the back of your head and only pulling back when you needed air only to pick you up with a smile, your legs wrapping around his waist as he spoke, “Now, my love, I’m going to take you back to my tent, no- OUR tent now and make bedbreaking love to you until the entire camp knows your… mine…” he growled out those last few words possessively before carrying you back to his tent, it was daybreak, making his skin have a golden glow, his silver hair looking lightened by the dying sun, you were relieved, scared, anxious, but surprisingly, you just knew it would all be okay.

As he laid you down on his bedroll, Astarion did his very best to be caring, gentle, kind, and most of all respectful as he carefully stripped you bare of your armor, kissing every inch of bare skin he revealed, starting with your neck, then your shoulder, then down your arm, the back of your neck, down your spine… until every article of your clothing was off so he could admire every inch of your body, his voice husky as his eyes grazed over you with adoration and affection, “My love, your… gorgeous, ethereal, breathtaking…” he moaned out huskily with a whine as he helped you to lay down, tilting his head as he gazed down at you, knelt between your thighs still fully dressed in his white tunic shirt and black leather pants that were now a little strained around the nether regions due to you did he start to strip for you, pulling his shirt over his head to reveal his pale skin and rippling abs, his chest rising and falling quicker with his excitement that was also shown between his thighs, straining through his pants he wanted to rip off for being in the way of him and you.

But he couldn’t wait, having to lean down in just his pants to kiss you tenderly, now that he had you, he just didn’t want to part from cherishing you even for the little time it took to undress himself, he just needed to feel your love, your touch, he waited long enough, “Help me, my love, please…” he whimpered out against your lips with a desperation, making you nod through breathy moans and breathes as you slid your hands down to unbutton his pants, shoving them down so he could kick them off, revealing his generous length, he was perfect, not too girthy or large, but just right, and so so pretty, his tip a angry pink and already dripping pre-cum for you, he was throbbing and impatient, but he was restraining himself. Astarion wanted this night to be perfect, not just lust. Love. He wanted to love you. To make slow and passionate love while worshipping your body to greater lengths then you’ve ever had, he swore in that moment to protect and cherish you for all off eternity, Gods be damned.

“I love you, Y/N, monster or not.” Astarion whispered out as he hovered over you, his arm holding him up as he guided his other down to his length to press his tip at your soaked entrance with a pleasured growl, gently pressing in until you gasped from the intrusion, making him still so you could adjust. He brought his hand up next to caress your cheek, leaning down for another deep kiss to distract you as he pushed in deeper slowly, making you arch with a whine against his lips at being filled, the stretch felt so good, and due to just how gentle he was being with you, it only made you wetter, you’ve never seen Astarion like this, so serious, so passionate and caring, so sincere… but as he started to slowly move, gentle thrusts accompanied with his deep breathy moans and various kisses littered across your collarbones before he dipped down more to suck one of your nipples into his mouth, making you gasp and arch, threading your fingers in his hair to tug which only made him groan with pleasure and nip at your nipple before thrusting a little harder in return, making you moan out loud.

The pleasure and passion only burned brighter as the time went on, Astarion focused on littering your skin with Marla of his claim as he pumped his cock inside you with a mission to claim you as his own, his eternal love… you both were matching each others moans, your thighs wrapped around his waist as he pounded into you, getting you closer and closer to your release which he could feel building with how your walls were pulsing around his cock, it made him gasp and moan, his hands pushing your knees up to your chest before he started to thrust more intensely, his focus on making you cum, getting his pleasure from your whines and cries as you sung such a pretty song for him. He could feel your slick coating his cock, watching his cock as is disappeared inside your tight wet heat repeatedly, it was enough for him to shutter and tense, moaning out loud, “L-Love, I’m close, please… ugh… cum with me, my love!” There was no way you could have held back with Astarion begging you with that breathless tone and stuttering thrusts, you felt his cock throb inside you which only made you shutter and moan with a nod as you placed your hand on his chest, gasping and arching as your eyes squeezed shut, crying out as your walls clamped down on his cock, covering his length with cum which only made him moan so passionate and loud with no shame, “Yes, darling, good girl! Cum for me, cum all over my cock, god! I love you!” He cried out, falling over you before wrapping his arms around your waist, thrusting sloppily before moaning into your ear as his orgasm hit him, his cock throbbing before his cum spurt deep inside you, filling you with his seed as he panted and groaned, his hands lazily stroking your lower back, his voice softer as he came down from his high, “Your mine…”

(Now I’m a lesbian… but this man makes me question myself…)

[twigstarpikachutroll22]

God.

I’ve never, EVER, felt as much absolute HORROR from Dracula thus far as that moment of Lucy fully vampirized. The noted dullness and hardness in her eyes, her talking like that, the way Van Helsing threw Arthur back from her, that moment of anger from her and her teeth clamping together at that before she came back to herself.

And nothing thus far has genuinely HURT me as much as processing Lucy’s death and hearing the way Arthur cried. I felt this one in my hecking guts.

And the song at the end. Actually freaking chilling. The actual terror that gripped me for the entire duration of it. I’m not sure I’ve felt anything like it up to this point.

I don’t think this story has ever before this caused me this level of abject terror and horror OR this level of actual pain and devastation.

Holy frick.

[marvelfanfn2187a113]

Hold Me

Dean Winchester x little sister!reader, slight Sam Winchester x little sister!reader

Requested by Anonymous

Synopsis: various times that Dean comforts you because of John.

You and Dean had a special bond. Even before Sam had gone off to college and John disappeared, the two of you had been inseparable since the day John first placed you in Dean’s arms.

He’d been just a teenager then, and you barely a toddler. But he’d flashed you a genuine smile, and you’d giggled, and from that moment on, nothing could separate you.

Dean was the one you always went to when you needed anything, partially because of how close you were and partially because you had no one else.

John was far too consumed with the big picture for you to ever feel comfortable talking about your personal problems, and while you loved Sam, he always tried to psychoanalyze your problems, which was never how you felt like dealing with them.

Dean, however…

…

“Commere baby,” Dean pulled you, his four year old little sister, into his lap, rocking you gently as you cried. John had been gone for five days, and you missed your daddy.

“Dad’s gonna be home soon, really,” Sam tried to soothe you, but you only cried harder.

“Hey, can you bring me her backpack?” Dean asked. Sam tossed it to him.

“Are you alright with her? I want to go get us some dinner,” Sam suggested, feeling bad but also desperate to get away from your crying. You’d been upset for the past couple of days, and he couldn’t take much more.

“Yeah, I’ve got her, bring me back a feast.”

After Sam was gone, Dean lifted you so you were hanging onto his neck and began to rummage through your bag. He came up with a small sippy cup, and went to the fridge to fill it with milk. After heating it up in the motel microwave, he sat back down on his bed and settled you into his lap, placing the cup into your tiny hands.

You quieted almost instantly, bringing the cup to your lips and drinking greedily.

“There you go,” Dean grinned, running his fingers through your hair. “Never too old for the warm milk, works every time, eh?”

You didn’t respond, to intent on the cup in your hands, but you leaned your head against Dean’s stomach, taking a few deep breaths as you finished your drink.

By the time Sam got back, you were fast asleep in Dean’s arms, who was softly humming Metallica.

…

“It wasn’t your fault.”

Sam’s words were meant to be soothing, but you just shook your head.

“Dad says it was.”

“Well he-“

“Sam, you’re with me. Y/N, ride with Dean,” John walked past his kids as he headed for his truck, and Sam reluctantly followed.

You climbed into the Impala without another word, and you rode in silence with Dean for several long minutes.

“Why are we turning?” You’d tried to avoid speaking, because you knew Dean would notice your voice thick with tears. But you couldn’t resist questioning him when he stopped following John’s truck.

“Because the Dairy Queen is this way,” Dean answered simply.

“What?”

“What, you think I didn’t notice the sniffling and the way you can’t even turn in my general direction? You ain’t subtle kid, now what kind of ice cream do you want?”

You gave up trying to hide your tear stained face and turned to look at your brother.

“I don’t get it. I screw up the hunt, and you’re buying me ice cream?”

“Ok first of all, you didn’t screw up the hunt that bad, ok? I know it was your job to reassemble the guns, and-“

“Yeah, and I lost a piece, and it didn’t work! You could’ve-“

“Hey now,” Dean’s voice rose, and you stopped. “Would you just listen? I know, but that wasn’t the only gun we had on the hunt, we were fine one gun short. Look, I’m not gonna pretend you didn’t make a mistake ok? But everyone makes mistakes, and I mean everyone. And dad went at you pretty hard, and I know how much you hate it when he yells. So ice cream it is, now are you gonna tell me what you want or should we just go?”

Five minutes later, you were on the road again, your tears forgotten as both of you belted out to Dean’s Metallica tape between bites of ice cream.

…

The mood in the motel room had been solemn, to say the least, but no one was willing to bring it up. John had passed away just days ago, and the three of you had barely spoken to each other since. Sam had tried to talk to you, mostly because he knew that every time you went to “take a walk”, you really just wanted to cry your eyes out. But the last thing you wanted to do what talk about John. He wasn’t always the best man, but he was your dad.

What made matters worse, however, was that even though Sam had tried several times to help you, Dean seemed to be avoiding you entirely. You didn’t expect him to try to talk about it, that wasn’t his style, but you also didn’t expect him to ignore your existence.

But when Sam left for a food run and the time came to confront him about it, you were nervous. What if he just needed some space? After all, he was probably the closest to John.

Well, if that was the case, then maybe you could help him this time, but you couldn’t leave things the way they were, it was too hard.

“Dean?”

Dean looked up from John’s journal, which he was reading while stretched out on his bed.

“What’s up?”

“Um…” now that the moment had come, you weren’t sure of what to say. “How’s it going?”

He sighed, gesturing at the book.

“Not great, haven’t found anything of use yet.”

You swallowed, “That’s not really what I meant. How’s it going…like with you?” You cringed inwardly. This sounded ridiculous, even to your own ears.

Dean closed the book, frowning.

“Fine.”

You sighed, “No, really.”

Dean scoffed, “Who are you, Sam? What’s going on with you?”

“I just…I wanted to know,” you shrugged.

“You and me both know that you don’t want to stand here and talk about feelings.”

“It’s better than not talking at all,” you dropped your gaze at this, too embarrassed to meet Dean’s eye. Maybe you were wrong, he hadn’t been avoiding you, he was just quiet or something.

“What do you mean? We can talk, we’re talking now.”

You gained a little bit of your courage back.

“Yeah, and this is the first time in days. Dean, you’ve barely even looked at me since…” your breath caught. You couldn’t say it, not yet.

Dean seemed to catch on that you were done, and he sighed.

“Kid, I don’t know what you’re-“

“I’m not just a kid anymore!” You didn’t mean to yell, and when Dean’s eyebrows rose in surprise you brought your voice down. “Please, don’t lie to me.”

Dean opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again. Finally, he cleared his throat, and found the words.

“I can’t fix this.”

“What?”

Dean put the journal down and gestured for you to get closer, so you climbed up on his bed and sat next to him.

“I can’t just buy you a treat and play Metallica and wait for you to stop crying, ok? I can’t put a bandaid on this. I can’t distract you from it, it’s too big.”

You looked up at your big brother, and his eyes looked more broken now than they did when John died.

“You wanted to fix this for me?”

“Of course,” Dean reached up and brushed a stray tear off your cheek. “That’s all I ever want to do. But baby…I can’t. I’m sorry. I’ve been avoiding you, you’re right. And it’s because I know I can’t make this go away.”

“You don’t have to make it go away. I don’t need an answer to all life’s problems, I just need my big brother.”

“But what do you need me to do?” He demanded desperately.

“Be here.”

You could see in his eyes that it wasn’t enough, he needed to know he was helping you. You sighed softly.

“Open your arms.”

He frowned, but obeyed. You scooted closer, depositing yourself in his lap and leaning your forehead against his chest. He hesitantly wrapped his arms around you, one hand coming up to cradle your head.

“I just want this,” you whispered, and you felt Dean’s arms tighten comfortingly around you.

“Then I’m here,” he promised.

When Sam came back, tired and worn down, he felt a smile creep onto his lips when he opened to motel door to see you asleep in Dean’s arms, and it took him less than a second to recognize Dean’s humming as Metallica.

[shotanzz]

Hiii💞 i wonder how they act when they have a crush 👀 cant wait for delulu Wonbin 🤣

RIIZE WHEN CRUSHING~ based on their birth charts

Authors Note: Im really scared I made this wayyy too long but enjoy everyone LOL

Shotaro

Stalks your socials once he gets them, but not in a creepy way ! Just to see the person you are outside of the settings he usually sees you in 😭. Tries to find out a lot about you..sometimes it’d -feel- likes he’s probing but it comes from a good place I swear. Would become your friend or at least well acquainted with you pretty fast and would be more forward with his interest. Super charming and would be pretty bold; would make a crazy amount of eye contact with you to where you can’t help but become flustered. Wouldn’t be too afraid of skinship tbsh.

Eunseok

You probably would barely know he liked you until you realize him bothering you was him having an excuse to be around you without raising suspicion; the fact every time you turn around he’s just..there 😭 even if he’s in the midst of hanging out/conversing with others he manages to be in the same place as you. Affectionate at the most random times like if you stubbed your toe he’d laugh at you till he cried but if you were upset about something so simple he’d be so empathetic. Would come at you with a mixture of teasing you whilst also trying to flirt with you at the same time ???

Sungchan

Straightens his back and tries to stand out whenever you’re around. Oh you have a bag that’s hard to carry ? Isn’t it sooo crazy that he, Sungchan can carry it for you without breaking a sweat. Will ask for your input and opinion on his work/dancing/rapping even if he knows he did well just to hear your praises and compliments. Suddenly starts wearing a certain brand that you mentioned you liked more often. Reiterates the fact you can depend on him..if you need a listening ear he’s there if you need advice or someone around he’s there. Showersss you in compliments and small gifts until you collapse.

Wonbin

I’ve noticed a lot of people think Wonbin is some type of toxic fratboy when it comes to romance but…no, not really. I won’t lie he’s been around the block before 😭 but when it comes to someone he GENUINELY LIKES. A damn simp he is. Would text you more compared to talking to you in person in the beginning out of shyness. Tries to bond with you via things you’re both interested in. May use artistic details to express how he feels..example: playing a song you like on his guitar for you. His approach is more slow and hesitant once he understands this requires actual effort and has to be genuine.

Seunghan

A literal flirt bot ohmg. Tries his best to be on your good side and for you to see him as someone you can easily trust and get along with initially. Invites you to come with him whenever hes about to go out to a fun activity, trying something new or about to party/drink. Compliments you SO MUCH and is more outwardly affectionate. Make fun of you A LOT (rip if you’re sensitive) but luckily he’d dote on you like right after. His venusian influence makes him popular with women so he’d try super hard to swat them away so you don’t get the wrong idea of him. Boasts to people that he has more of a chance with you than anyone else 😭

Sohee

Similary to Shotaro he’d get acquainted with you pretty easily. Ik a lot of briize view Sohee as soft and sweet but ngl his sag mercury makes him pretty blunt plus it’s square mars so he might talk a bit reckless 😭 He might mention liking you without MENTIONING liking you yk. He’d say it so plainly to where you think it’s a joke BUT ITS NOT HES VERY FR. Jokes his way into your heart and hangs out with you in fun locations. Definitely makes fun of other guys to ensure to you he’s the one for you LMFAOO. He’s typically the one being doted on but once he likes you he’d switch the role.

Anton

The biggest. Friends to lovers trope. Occurrence ever. Hed be introverted and keep his distance in the beginning but as soon as you were more closer he’d do small sweet things like spam your phone , give you snacks, have you tag along with him whenever he’s heading somewhere random. His aries influence makes him competitive and taurus venus slightly makes him possessive so he’d def try to get your attention more than others. There’d most def be a funny limbo of both you and him not knowing whether you two were friends, together or in some kind of in between 😭.

[xobrattymoonxo]

TANAKA X READER X KIYOKO

TW: Noncon, kidnapping, unconscious, strap on, anal, please let me know if I missed anything!

An: Angels!! I'm back fully besides writing a smau, I'm here to take requests! Please send in some via Dm or Ask!! I actually don't think I've ever gotta a request, so I'd really love to get one 🤧🤧😅😅

Word count: 1.6K

The clock struck midnight finally as the young Y/n left the club entrance.

“Leaving so early, Cinderella? Not even a single shoe for me to find you, fair maiden?” The black haired man jokes.

“I am no princess sir, but I do have a curfew and it’s getting late. I must call a taxi now. It was lovely meeting you, though Tanaka.” Y/n said with a smile.

“How about I drive you?” He offered out his hand.

Y/n didn’t know if it was the whiskey talking or if she genuinely trusted him, but she reached her hand out and grabbed his.

He pulled her in closer as he pulled out his phone sending off a text. A car was quick to pull up in front of the two.

“This is us.” He said as he reached out and grabbed the door handle and let her in the SUV.

Y/n followed Tankaa into the SUV. He pulled her down on his lap. He wrapped his arms around her waist.

“What are you doing?” Y/n asked slightly nervously.

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.” He kissed her neck sensually.

“D-do you need my address?” Y/n asked.

“Nope.” He said calmly as he continued the kisses on her neck.

“Let me out of the car.” She demanded. She began to move and tried to push herself off his lap. His grip got tighter.

“Stop struggling, make this easy for me, okay?” Tanaka said.

“No! Let me out right now!” She demands.

Tanaka let out a sigh as he moved, suddenly she was below him, laying flat on her back on the seat.

“You’ll obey me, Y/n. I am your new master, you have no choice.” His voice grew dark and scary as he spoke down to her. Y/n had tears brimming her eyes as she looked in his eyes. His eyes were like a cat's.

Tanaka reached behind the one seat and pulled out a small syringe.

“Are you going to behave? Or do I have to use this?” He threatened.

Y/n began to tear up more. She shook her head no.

“No you won’t behave?” Tanaka laughed. “Okay, well it’s time to use this I guess.” He slammed the needle into her arm as she cried out in pain.

Tanaka watched as she tried to fight off the tiredness. She tried to fight off Tanaka, but she couldn't. She faded out quickly in his arms.

It was hours later when Y/n finally awoke. To her surprise, she was still in the dress she had worn out to the club earlier. It was pretty dark as she laid on a bed, surrounded by curtains, as if she was a princess. One side had light slightly peaking in and soft whispers could be heard from the other side. She moved as quietly as she could to slide the curtain over more slightly and looked out. She noticed various people wearing masks and exquisite clothing. Y/n couldn’t recognize any one.

It wasn’t long till a woman noticed and called Tanaka. He smiled, wearing the same dress shirt and pants from earlier, he approached the bed.

“Good morning sleepy.” He teased her. He reached his hand out to touch her face as she pulled back. “Don’t play hard to get now, pet. I’ve already got you.” He laughed. He began pulling open the curtains more as Y/n realized the room full of chairs. Y/n looked around the room disgusted.

“Let me go home before I call the cops!” She demanded.

“Silly little pet, no one will give you their phone. They are all here for one reason and one reason only and that's to watch me fuck you.” He gave her a sly smirk.

“Please don’t.” She gasps out.

“No, I think I will.” He forcibly grabs her by the neck and shoves her backwards.

She hears a voice say “The show is about to begin.” As people rushed to their seats.

Tanaka puts his free hand up as a woman hands him a pair of scissors. Tanaka immediately cut Y/n’s dress in one quick snip. Y/n’s eyes widen in fear but she can't do anything as she is holding his hand as he pushed harder on her throat. Tanaka laughs a dark chuckle as he continued to cut her under garments off.

Tanaka finally let go as she began coughing. She lay completely naked in front of everyone now. She turns her head to notice a woman wearing a sexy lingerie top with a puffy skirt. Tanaka gave her a look as she climbed onto the bed.

“This is Kiyoko, but you can call her mommy.” Tanaka said.

“No! No I won’t!” Y/n tried to move away as Tanaka climbed up on the bed, moving Y/n’s torso on top of his lap. He held her arms tightly in place.

“Go on kiyoko, Show our new pet what you have for her.”

Kiyoko gave a sinister smile as she lifted her dress skirt to reveal a 9 inch pink strap on. The audience clapped and cheered as Kiyoko licked two fingers, instantly slamming them into Y/n’s dry pussy. Y/n let out a holler in pain as she tried to move away from her fingers. Due to Tanaka’s grip, Y/n was unable to move. Tanaka somehow managed to rip Kiyoko’s skirt off her, leaving the strapon in plain sight.

“Shove it in dry!” Someone from the audience yelled out.

Tanaka smirked as Kiyoko removed her fingers. She was quick to slam the strap on deep inside, not even giving Y/n a second to adjust.Y/n had tears running down her face as she begged Kiyoko to stop.

“Please take it out!” Y/n screamed.

She had her eyes closed when she felt a strong burning on her right cheek. As Tanaka had slapped her hard across the face.

“Shut up and behave or it will be worse for you!” He spat. Kiyoko shoved her pussy juice coated fingers down Y/n’s throat. She showed no mercy when pounding into her pussy. Tanaka bent down, taking a nipple in his mouth and biting it hard. Y/n let out a scream. Tanaka tasted the slight bit of blood but he didn’t care as he continued to suck and bite her nipple.

Kiyoko began taking off her strap, leaving it inside Y/n to stretch her out. Kiyoko climbed up pushing Tanaka’s head out of the way as she placed the lips of her pussy above Y/n’s lips on her face.

“Pleasure me, pet” She demanded before fully placing herself down. She began to move back and forth, leaving her juices all over Y/n’s face. Kiyoko could feel her hot tears on her pussy. She grinded deeper into her face as she laughed and pulled Kuroo in for a kiss. Y/n began to lick strides up Kiyoko’s pussy as Tanaka reached down and pinched her nipple demanding her to get into it or suffer.

Y/n was sucking on Kiyoko’s bud as Kiyoko moaned into Tanaka’s lips. Kiyoko felt herself building an orgasm, but she pulled away. Kiyoko Moved back down to Y/n’s pussy where she had the strap up still shoved deep inside. Kiyoko ran her hand over Y/n’s stomach feeling the bulge of the large pink dildo. Kiyokyo shoved her face between her legs as she began slowly sucking her clit. Kiyoko slowly pulled the dildo from her pussy.

“If you cum, I will shove this up your ass. Got it?” Kiyoko said.

Y/n shook her head, terrified.

Tanaka laughed as he slowly released her upper half from his grasp. He placed her down on the bed and moved down grabbing her thigh ever so roughly.

“You are so beautiful. I think this is my favorite toy we’ve ever got.” He said to Kiyoko. She let out a small chuckle as she continued to eat out Y/n.

Y/n felt herself building up in the pit of her stomach.

“S-stop! Stop please!” She begged Kiyoko. Tanka was fast to slap her other cheek as he laughed and ushered Kiyoko to continue.

To their surprise, Y/n then squirted all over Kiyoko’s face.

“Fuck thats hot.” Tanaka moaned.

Tanaka moved Y/n on her side as he slipped in behind her. Kiyoko gabbed Y/n by the neck as she licked her juices off her face.

“She tastes amazing Ryo.”

Tanaka Moves closer to Kiyoko’s face and licked off the remaining bit.

“Fuck you’re right, babe.” He said.

Kiyoko moved herself up so the two pussies alined. Tanaka was spreading Y/n’s ass cheeks as he spit down on his hand. He used his spit as lubrication to shove it in her un prepaid asshole.

“FUUUCCCKKKK” Tanaka moaned. “She's definitely a virgin back here.”

Kiyoko giggled as Y/n cried out in pain. The two continued to move and force Y/n to submit to them.

This continued for a while, but Y/n had passed out from the pain.

The two came on Y/n as they left her unconscious body on the bed.

“Now the Vips audience may come up and do as they please to her.” Tanaka said to a small section of men and women.

Six people were quick to stand up and approach the bed.

“I want to fuck her whore throat so badly.” One man with silver and black hair said.

“Just don’t kill this one, Bo, I like her, and I want her around for a while.” Kiyoko spoke up.

Taglist: @itsmearia01

Taglist open 🥰 dm or send an ask to be added

[34saveme34]

(this is angst, I'm killing him)

the crew imprisoned Puzzles for a while now, and everyone decided maybe it would be good to kill him for good if he didn't die yet. 3 gets chosen to do it. He thought it'd be an easy job

word count: 1421

It was a dark cabin where he was. Restrained. Only the wind made soft noise outside. His own odd sounds he found out to be his own breathing. He forgot how loud it can be when he doesn’t have a show running in his head. The silence was deafening but so was the fate that was coming for him. As a light source, all he had was his screen, also making humming noises. He would sometimes turn it off as the noise was slowly driving him mad. At least that gave him a sort of variety he wouldn’t have otherwise. At least it gave him a lot of time to think. For better or for worse.

On a fateful day, the door to where he was sealed away opened, the light feeling like the blinding lights of heaven. He even would’ve believed he died if he wasn’t so sure that he wouldn’t go there. He missed his chance.

“Hi, freak” 3 came in, not closing the door after himself.

“SMG3…” something felt solemn about his voice. The tone kind of frightened 3 but he tried his best to hide it.

“You don’t have to say my name like that, sheesh” 

“What do you want me to say?”

“Nothing, preferably”

Puzzles chuckled.

“I’ve been doing that so I’d prefer not to”

“What you do or don’t prefer is irrelevant right now”

“Uhuh… Why are you here anyways?”

“Well, I was the one picked to check on you”

“Check on me? No one ever did that for me” there was such an uncomfortable genuine vibe dripping off of Puzzles’s words, 3 couldn’t reply for a while, making awkward silence between them. 

“Nevertheless… Check on me for what?” Puzzles tried to break the silence that felt ever so concerningly familiar to him at this point.

“...To see if you’re dead… and that if you’re not, I have…” as 3 spoke, he slowly raised a gun he brought.

“So you came to kill me?”

“Yes” he pointed the gun at Puzzles.

Puzzles sighed, which was once again a reaction 3 wasn’t used to. He was used to people trembling in fear when he threatened them. Not fucking sighing. It was pretty visible how his hand with the gun lightly lowered.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” 3 asked, now his voice giving away just how much Puzzles’s odd behaviour was affecting him.

“Well, for one, I was put in a closed space with no light for several days. Sure wonder who is responsible for that”

“You deserve as much for what you did”

“I… I guess…”

3 once again raised his gun at Puzzles.

“Hey… SMG3?”

Once again that tone that scared 3 so much for some reason. He whipped the gun away from Puzzles’s direction. 

“Fucking what?? Can’t I just do what I was asked to and go??”

Puzzles ignored his words.

“I heard something about how you used to be a villain”

“Yes… your point?”

“I just… when I see someone like me, I can feel it.”

3 looked at him confused, his heart felt invaded in a way he thought nobody could. Like intimately pushing in a dagger that doesn’t kill but puts you on the edge regardless.

“I’m nothing like you”

“Really?... You flinched pretty hard when I mentioned being lonely. Were you lonely before as well?”

3 didn’t reply, the gun shaking his hand.

“I mean… I understand. Loneliness can do some scary things to your brain… I do wish sometimes I could just turn back time and do things right. But I do also wonder if there would even have been a right way… I mean, doesn’t it sometimes feel like life can just… force you to be lonely forever?”

Puzzles laughed at himself as 3 raised his gun, tearing up.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!” he cried.

“Oh… I hit a nerve? Sorry, SMG3… I didn’t know… we could’ve been so… similar”

“We are NOT the same”

“We aren't”

“THEN STOP SAYING IT AND DIE ALREADY”

“Shoot me then. What is stopping you?”

3 stopped, his head becoming way too loud.

He leaned against the doorway, trying to keep himself together. Why didn’t he kill him already? What was holding him back at this point? This man hurt him and his friends badly. Even his best friend… They all lost so much because of him… So then, why?

“Hey, SMG3” Puzzles’s voice was weirdly comforting “It’s okay if you relate. No one will hate you for it”

“I already said, I’m nothing like you” 3 was full blown crying at this point.

“This is starting to get dumb… relating to me doesn’t make you me”

3 looked at him still angry but his expression softened on Puzzles regardless if he wanted it to or not.

“It just shows we have similar roots… But unlike me, you were given a chance for redemption”

3 didn’t reply, looking away from Puzzles, still staying silent.

“You… don’t need to give it to me” Puzzles said “I don’t want to… manipulate you into letting me go.”

“Then what the hell is your goal??” 3 asked, trying to be menacing but that kind of rage was gone from him at this point. He broke. 

“Me? Having a goal at this point? Don’t joke… I’m just talking at this point. Talking as long as I can”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why aren’t you trying to make me trick you into keeping you alive?”

“Like you would keep me alive! Besides… even if I did, I don’t know if I could get into a normal life. Being a villain like me… does have its drawbacks”

“I… I thought that too” 3 fully turned away from Puzzles, looking out the door “I was sent to the Internet Graveyard as my punishment. and I… learned there. It took a while but I… managed to make a life for myself that I could enjoy, even with all its quirks” he chuckled, thinking about it.

“I’m glad you were given a chance, SMG3”

“I… I am too. I’m… kind of happy with where I am right now” 3 never found himself talking so genuinely to someone before as he did then. It felt odd but he relaxed a lot more now, being able to think easier. He still found the situation absurd though.

A weird silence rested between them. 3 didn’t know what to do anymore.

“Sometimes I wish I could’ve been happy too but… I missed out”

“Are you sure you’re not trying to manipulate me?”

“I’m just speaking my mind… You know, I’ve gotta if I’m bound to die soon enough.”

3 teared up. He was starting to wish this wouldn’t end.

“What… What if I… hypothetically… didn’t want to kill you anymore?”

Puzzles looked at him confused.

“What? But I hurt all your friends. It’s only fair. I know… even the fans feel that way”

“I… I hurt 4 too and… I’m still here”

“You don’t have to forgive me”

3 looked at him kind of upset.

“Why don’t you want anything?? Am I not offering you what you wanted all along?? Freedom??”

3 put down the gun and untied Puzzles.

“Fucking THERE! You can run away now and never look back. And then no one will have to know. I’ll just lie that I did it so that they don’t search for you.”

But Puzzles didn’t move. 

“You’re too kind, SMG3”

“Fucking MOVE” 3 flipped Puzzles off the chair, but he could only flop down on the ground. “BE FREE FUCKING DAMN IT” he cried.

“Why? I mean… what did I do to deserve… anything”

“I just- I just want to give you a chance, like how I got one myself- I know- I KNOW people can change” 

Puzzles sighed as he grabbed the gun but 3 took it away from him.

“No! I said leave! Not life, just this god damn prison! GO!!”

Puzzles grabbed onto 3’s hand with which he held the gun. He turned it back to himself.

3 froze, never did he meet someone so willing to die. He really didn’t know what to do.

“I didn’t think I would die to someone like this but hey!” Puzzles showed a weak smile to 3 “I’m glad it was you”

3 looked away, as soon as he noticed the trigger being pulled. He didn’t want to witness this. He didn’t want to believe anything that just happened. He shut his eyes, running out of the place, never looking back. At least it was done.

[inamagicalhallucination]

pm dazai time traveling and meeting the ada and them being freaked out by him and him scaring them and thinking theyre all idiots for trusting him and it all being angsty and shit is a very interesting take

but personally, i think if pm dazai ever time traveled to meet the ada, they would, without much thought, say or do something that shows that they genuinely like him and he would probably just pass out because he cant handle genuine positive emotions directed at him (see bsd wan)

kunikida: here have this drink so you don’t pass out and die from dehydration you bastard

pm dazai: ... why did you get me this one?

kunikida: it’s ur favorite?????

pm dazai: oh *passes out*

/

pm dazai: so... you all think im ur friend

kenji: you are our friend !! we do all sorts of fun stuff together !! *thinking about all the times dazai helped him bring a cow into the office*

pm dazai: huh *internally screaming*

/

pm dazai: *vaguely shifts*

yosano: oh are your bandages itchy? i have some spare if you wanna go and change them?

pm dazai: *dies but not in the way he wants to*

/

pm dazai: im a demon; human emotions don’t mean much to me

ranpo: i’ve seen you cry over studio ghibli films, you’re as human as they get

pm dazai: oh

/

pm dazai: you just accepted me into your agency?

fukuzawa, patting his head: of course 

pm dazai: *just fucking drops to the ground*

/

pm dazai:

Jun'ichiro: oh hey, here, naomi and i thought you might be bored so we set up a bunch of movies to watch or games for you to play :)

pm dazai, on the verge of passing out, lightheaded: wh-what

naomi: yeah! we picked all the ones we thought you’d like :))

pm dazai: *falling to the ground*

/

kyoka: here

pm dazai, taking the crepe: what’s this

kyoka: i went to get some and thought you’d enjoy this flavor.

pm dazai: *chokes and nods*

/

pm dazai: why do you like me so much

atsushi: there’s lots of reasons to like you mr. dazai! maybe it’s because you always take care of me. maybe it’s because you’re funny. maybe it’s because you were the first human i ever met. it’s hard to pinpoint

pm dazai: *cries and passes out*

//

bonus:

pm dazai, staring at the grave in front of him:

atsushi: i didn’t know your friend, mr. dazai, but i think he would’ve been very proud over how much you’ve tried, and how much you’ve succeeded in being a good person

pm dazai: im not a good person. even if future me has deluded you all to think-

atsushi: i think mr. dazai is a really good person. he may have done bad things before, but i think putting in the effort to change and be better is amazing. you help people through the agency, and you prove you’re a good person. maybe you’re not perfect, but we all love you because you’re you mr dazai :)

//

i didn’t include haruno or katai because i was running out of brain thoughts sorry

/

anyway since atsushi was horrifically abused his entire life, i thought it’d be interesting to have him call dazai the first human he met, because he’d be the first kind and real person he’d have met - since the orphanage was filled with people who tormented him, they’re registered in his head for the inhumane treatment they put him through if that all makes sense

anyway

i made a few people mention dazai being human since he has that whole thing of thinking he’s not

yeah anyway these are just my two cents feel free to add on or comment

[sadie-bug345]

how the gang drives🤡☝️✨🤭

shhhh let's pretend i’ve been active this whole time🧍‍♀️

ponyboy:

surprisingly safe but WHITE KNUCKLING IT THE WHOLE WAY

guy needs to calm downnnnn

seems like he’s super chill on the outside but his whole back and neck is mega tense

takes two tries to pass the drivers test but pony dgaf and just drove without it

prays he doesn’t see a cop cause when he does he gets terrified they’re gonna pull him over and ask for his license and registration

“…does a learners permit count😀☝️?” type beat😭😭

road rage score: 3/10 focuses too much on himself

johnny:

genuinely chilled out

doesnt know anything abt the technicalities of driving though

two-bit once mentioned something abt the “right of way” and johnny turned to him like

“🤨if you don’t stop makin made up words n shit i’m gonna crash this car right now”

two said “so you’re crashing it on purpose this time🤨☝️”

gagged johnny

but anyways yeah johnnycake did hit a socs’ parked car once in a neighborhood and sped off SO FAST

poor guy never heard the end of it from the gang

road rage score: 5/10 solid horn user

sodapop:

i feel like realistically no sensible person would ever let this boy behind the wheel but ANYWAYS

WAY TOO RELAXED like he WILL talk to you about super deep stuff and get real into the conversation if you’re in the passenger seat

like bro will fully turn his head and look at you when you’re talking or smth for minutes on end

guy LOOK AT THE ROAD😭😭

it’s just cause you’re so stunning pookie trust✨🙏

road rage score: 2/10 prob yells in the car but barely anyways

darry:

he’ll talk in the car for sure but it’s usually about what’s going on in the road

like he’ll just make comments about everyone else’s driving skills

also super road rage-y but in a dad typa way

i DESPISE it when people act like darry has a fucking boomer grandpa geriatric ass but in this circumstance it’s true😔

he doesn’t drive like an old person at all but if you cut him off in traffic and you hear some random man yell from behind you “HEY WATCH IT BUDDY” followed by intense honking..

it’s darry and you better speed on outta there real quick 😭

road rage score: 10/10 he’s stressed and works too damn hard to be treated like this by the general public😔

dally:

my MANNNNN🥰🥰🥰

we already know how he drives like bro stole bucks car and i think when buck realized dally took it buck just knew it would be totaled by the time he got it back

like bro takes reckless to another level

speeding, driving w one hand (🫢🫢BADDIE ALERT🚨🚨), not using blinkers and almost totaling the car 20 separate occasions before arriving at his destination

also he totally does not fill up the gas tank as often as he should like bro grinds on empty for miles straight

you’re like “uhhh the gas light just turned on..”

and he’s just like “nahhh ill make it work you jus see”

and he does🤷‍♀️

road rage score: 11/10 doesn’t yell at you w windows rolled down like darry but will tailgate you like there’s no tomorrow. also brake checks people CONSTANTLY

two-bit:

goofy ahh driver😭

when he sees a friend on the street or next to him at an intersection he will do some stupid honk thing like yankee doodle type shit💀

swerves in and out of empty lanes cause he thinks it’s funny to scare the other people in the car

”pity the backseat” got a whole other meaning istg😭

will bang his head against the steering wheel if you’re going too slow

also pimps out his car like there’s no tomorrow bros got all the dumbest most useless decorations possible

road rage score: 6/10

steve:

car nerddddd🤓☝️🫵

only puts premium gas in his tank cause he’s a bit of a snob but it’s steve and his life is cars soooo yk he treats the engine right

that sounds super weird😭

probably the most normal driver during the day but when it comes to drag races he’s absolutely bonkers like nothing held back

cries if someone scratches his car

road rage score: 9/10 super quick to honk and to flip you off like you get into his space one second and then you get death threats i don’t make the rules🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

OK TYSMMMM ILL TRY AND GET MORE ACTIVE AGAIN REQUESTS ARE OPEN OK BYEEEE

[leejeongz]

breaking up with enhypen pretty please 🎧🎀

🫧 breaking up with enhypen 🫧

pairing: exboyf!enha x gn!reader

genre: angst

warnings: made up characters that do not reflect on the members personally, dramatised situations for reader’s enjoyment, a little bit toxic (heeseung’s and sunoo’s are very toxic ngl), mentions of food (sunghoon), swearing (sunoo).

a/n: this was the first time i’ve ever cried while writing smth idk why i made jake’s hit so close to home but i hope u enjoy it after i put myself thru that HAHAH

𓆉 heeseung

“i just don’t think you should be wearing a top that shows your whole chest when my friends are around,” heeseung kissed his teeth before turning to his friends at the bar.

your friends' eyes all shifted to you, you could tell just by looking at them what they were going to say. “i’ll talk to him in the morning,” you assured, yet they didn’t look that impressed with you, knowing your track record.

the morning came and you were still upset from the night before, something that doesn’t usually happen.

more & other members under the cut

“you know, y/n, you were a real embarrassment in front of my friends last night,” the words angered you even more.

“hm no, i think i was perfectly fine,” where you’d usually apologise, you fought back, “you can’t expect me to let you speak to me like you do . i’m always trying to find the right time to be upset with you.” you were slightly disappointed by what you said, you know it wasn’t exactly what you wanted to say, but you were holding back tears, it was the best you could do.

“there’s nothing to be upset with me for,” heeseung was genuinely stunned, as if he’d always been this perfect boyfriend he convinced himself that he was.

you scoffed, sitting on the bed as heeseung stood on the other side of it. “i’m always strategizing how to bring stuff up, you’re constantly avoiding talking about things that make me feel uncomfortable and bad, sometimes i think so hard about stuff that i end up dropping it, i hate living like this.” you spoke with your head in your hands, the tears you were holding back were seeping out uncontrollably.

“you drop it because it’s nothing,” not at all taken aback by your admission, heeseung presses more.

“just get out. i don’t want this, or us, or you,” you affirm, “i deserve better.”

“course you do,” heeseung laughs before picking up his backpack, “good luck finding it.”

𓆉 jay

you lay in your bed, staring at the wall while jay played on his phone next to you, wondering how you ever ended up in this situation. you liked jay, a lot. there was no disputing that. but did you deserve to be with him?

jay shuffled next to you, he’d turned over and was going to spoon you with an arm draped over your waist when you suddenly turned over yourself and sat a little further up the bed.

“why, what’s wrong?” jay asked, wondering if he’d gone too far.

“jay,” you paused, looking to your boyfriend for reassurance as you spoke, “i don’t think im ready for a relationship, just yet.”

jay’s face dropped to a disappointed frown that he tried to hide from you. “it’s okay.” he finally sat up, he searched for permission to hold your hand, which you granted by placing it on his lap.

you focused on your interlocked hands. if someone had told you that you’d be doing this a few months ago, you’d never have believed it.

“you’re everything i could’ve asked for and more, y/n,” jay looks to your hands too and wraps his other hand around them. “i’ll wait for you no matter what, okay?”

you know jay doesn’t want to break up, but you can’t keep leading him on like this. “i can’t even love myself, how am i supposed to know how to love you?” you blurt out in a flood of tears. “you’re so so perfect, jay, i want you to find better, please, jay.” your eyes are pleading into his, as if this is the only thing that will ever make you happy.

“y/n, you’re my everything.” he tuts and tilts his head, “but i think, if this is what you want, then let’s put on the breaks for a bit.” you gave jay a guilty smile. “don’t be like that, y/n, it was pretty exhausting for me too,” jay laughed, hoping you’d take it as a joke but really hiding some truth.

𓆉 jake

you sat in jake’s car, the silent journey to the airport still replaying in your mind as you put off getting out. you wanted to be with him forever, but you knew the minute you stepped out of the car, you would be all alone, without jake, so you stayed for as long as you could. you looked at yourself in the small mirror of the sunshield, your eyes welling up as you noticed your boyfriend in your peripheral vision.

“y/n, you okay, darling?” jake peered his head around.

“no,” you cried out, “ i already miss you, and i’m not even gone.”

jake laughed a little before wrapping you in his arms, kissing the crown of your head.

“i hate that i’m not going to see you tomorrow, or the day after, or even the day after that,” you pulled away from his hug to wipe your tears, “i hate that we can’t be together all the time, and i hate that we had to end things like this.”

jake took a long inhale. his eyes stumbled around his car, avoiding focusing on anything for too long because he knew he’d cry. he didn’t want you to see him cry, not today.

“me too, angel. me too.” jake’s eyes welled up as he admired you in person for one last time.

you took a deep breath, the tears blurring your vision as you wrapped your fingers around the door handle and opened it slowly. you took one last look at jake, he managed to take your face into his hands and wipe your tears as you smiled at him.

“don’t be a stranger, hey?” jake tilted his head to the side, “call me whenever you need, i’m still your bestest friend, my love.”

you took the opportunity to kiss him on the cheek, you regretted it so much. he looked away as you slipped out of the car and got your suitcase from the trunk. you turned to wave at the boy you’d loved for a very long time, only to see him, absolutely destroyed, leaning over his steering wheel.

𓆉 sunghoon

you always knew sunghoon to be an honest person and vocal when he needed to be. you never wanted him to feel like he couldn’t be. but you couldn’t help but feel that something was missing.

“how about this weekend?” you asked, twirling the pasta around your fork. “we could book a hotel by sea and just relax,” and rekindle the flame that died, you thought, but didn’t dare say aloud.

“this weekend?” you nod, “i’m working, sorry.” he didn’t make eye contact as he spoke, instead staring directly at his plate.

you stabbed a chunk of mushroom loudly, catching his attention, “working…” he hummed in response, the tone of which elicited a scoff from you. “you’re always working, everytime i suggest we do something together, you’re conveniently working, do you even love me anymore sunghoon?”

sunghoon stayed completely silent, staring back down at his food.

“sunghoon?”

still, nothing.

you slammed the fork down onto the table and stood, pushing the chair back with a horrible screech. you focused on the boy for a while. how could you break up with him and let him win? when he didn’t even have the decency to speak? but you knew it would hurt you more if you didn’t say “then i guess it’s over.”

“i guess,” sunghoon finally spoke. he seemed unbothered, maybe even a little happy that someone finally said it. “should i go now or?”

you stared him down, he placed the fork down gingerly and left your apartment sharpish, leaving you to overthink everything about the past few months.

𓆉 sunoo

“so let me get this straight,” sunoo laughed as clapped his hands together twice, a little too sassily for your liking. “you’re mad at me because im being nice to my fans?”

“fan, singular, not plural, sunoo,” you clarified.

“so what, we have matching phone cases? you said you didn’t wanna do that, anyway.”

“i didn’t mean go and get them with someone else,” you scoffed and rolled your eyes at his facetiousness, “and it’s not just that. it’s weird enough that you found their social media and trusted them enough with your private accounts when i wasn’t even allowed to follow them for months, but going out with them and buying them gifts, that’s a bit too far.”

“it’s called a parasocial relationship,” he completely dismissed your concerns, “how can you be in a relationship with an idol if you can’t even respect that i have fans?”

you furrowed your brows in confusion, “do the other members do this? how about i call jungwon up, ask what he thinks, hm?”

sunoo soon became very quiet, he knows that this is more than an idol x fan relationship, he knows the others disapprove of it just as much as you do, he knows that this is wrong. he noticed that you’d caught on and once again searched for any kind of defence he could reach.

“you’re overreacting, and if you’re gonna be like this, then we’re done, y/n,” he suddenly blurts out, slipping his phone out of his pocket to text you know who about your argument immediately.

“yeah, no shit we’re breaking up,” you double down on sunoo’s words, wishing you could’ve said them first, “you’re a nasty piece of work, i wish them the best of luck for having to deal with you.”

for weeks after, you couldn’t help but regret your final words to sunoo. you debated on sending him an apology, but decided against it when you saw fans coming to defend you once the news had been released.

𓆉 jungwon

as you entered jungwon’s room, you could tell by the dishevelled look on his face, he knew exactly why you were here. you sat on the edge of his bed, one leg folded under you, the other dangling, your foot barely touching the floor. jungwon sat cross legged, his back against the single pillow propped up by his headboard.

“so,” he started, forcing a smile. “how have you been?”

“good,” you smiled back at him shyly, not because you felt shy as such, but because you knew what you were about to do was going to hurt him. “jungwon, i think we should break up.” you gave him time to digest your words before continuing. “i love you, but that’s not enough, for me, right now.” you purse your lips in hopes that you wouldn’t cry, “because you hurt me. and i can’t trust you, as hard as i try, i just can’t,” you ramble.

“it’s okay, y/n,” jungwon nodded in agreement, “i’m just sorry i couldn’t be the boyfriend you deserve.” you noticed jungwon had reached into the drawer of his bedside cabinet, following his hands which carried a cardboard box. “i was going to give this to you for your birthday, but i want you to have it now.”

you opened it, revealing a childlike friendship bracelet in your favourite colours, the black and white letter cubes spelling out “all my love.”

“i’m not giving it to you to make you feel guilty. i want you to have it because i want you to always remember that you’re loved.” his hands closed it into yours, “i've learnt so much from you.”

you couldn’t help but scoff at his final comment, it was a bit of a joke to you that he had to learn not to cheat on people that he loved, but you were hopeful that he would never do it to anyone else ever again. you left him with a half genuine smile and a tiny thank you.

“i’ll bring your stuff later this week,” he said, drawing your attention back to him, “can i?”

𓆉 niki

“i can give you more space,” niki pleaded, just saying whatever came to his head without giving it too much logical thought.

“i don’t need space,” you stood from the couch, your hands finding your head in frustration, “are you not listening to me? i’m sick of having to look after you, can you not do anything for yourself?” you snapped.

niki wasn’t able to respond. he remembered, just earlier that day, you’d had to remind him of the dentist appointment you’d made for him. “isn’t that too far?” he sulked, his eyes swollen and sunken even though he hadn’t cried.

all rationality was lost, “not when it’s true,” you scoffed at the boy, who seemed like he was finally accepting some fault. “don’t you feel ashamed?” you pushed, until niki looked as if he’d reach boiling point.

“if you’re going to treat me like a child i might as well act like one, y/n,” niki stands too, he towers over you, but you insist in your mind that you can stand your ground. “you constantly embarrass me in front of people, “i had to make him an appointment” “i had to cook his dinner for him,”” he mimics, “i can do those things just fine, y/n, but you love doing them just to have one up on me, don’t you?”

you squint, you didn’t realise that’s what you were doing, but it was probably true. “well, you’ll be fine doing all those things when i’m gone,” niki’s face drops, yours follows as the weight of the words hit you like a truck, but you know it’s not working. “i’m gonna go now, i’ll get my stuff tomorrow, if that’s okay?”

niki nods, a small smile on his face that’s just begging to remain civil with you after all of this is over.