#I found a kitten and it has consumed my life

[crimson-hope]

Basic BG3 Race Lore: Dragonborn

(Disclaimer: This is JUST for RP reasons for those who want it, feel free to do what you want. Yeah Dragonborn lore has changed so much so I might get stuff wrong, but I can give you some stuff that has remain the same. Also while most people say they their non-dragon parent is human, there's no actual lore saying it can't be something else. That is if they have a dragon parent at all, some do some don't. It all depends on the world.)

Physical: Dragonborns tend to be a big and bulky race, standing well above 6 feet or 182cm. On average, they weigh around of 220​ to ​320 pounds (100​ to ​150 kilograms). Unsurprisingly, there is no specifics when it goes to genitals so have fun with whatever headcanon you want. Also technically tails are uncommon, and considered a deformity buuuut most people give their dragonborns tails anyway.

Lifecycle: Dragonborns are birthed from eggs, and are able to walk soon after birth. By the time they are 3 they look like they are the same age as 10 year old human child. Dragonborns reach adulthood at the age of 15. They live to be around 80, And I feel like this is weird since dragons live so long, and my DM does retcon this so they live longer

Dragonborn Types: There's a couple of ways to categorize dragonborns. If you go with the more common way, there are technically 3 types of dragonborn but only two are currently only 2 in the game, Chromatic(Black, blue, green, red, and white) and Metallic (Brass, bronze, copper, gold, and silver). Chromatic Dragons tend to be evil, while Metallic Dragons trend towards good.(The missing type is Gem Dragonborns: Amethyst, crystal, emerald, sapphire, and topaz) There are more colors buuuuut they've been put the back burner in recent lore. Chromatic Dragonborns tend to be judged based on their draconic ancestry and may be faced with mistrust.

There is also Draconblood and Ravenite, but they are not relevant to BG3 since it's Critical Role stuff.

Culture: To Dragonborns clan is everything, and so is honor. Breaking you word is considered a serious crime. And as mentioned above, Dragonborns live to 80, but many don't reach to it due actively seeking death once they get up there in age.

Dragonborns relationship with dragons is VERY dependent on the world. In some worlds they will actively hate dragons, and and others they they will serve what is known as True Dragons.

In terms of art and leisure, Dragonborns, like dwarves, are prefer function over form. They will create things with for a purpose and rarely for just decoration. They do like making things beautiful though. You'll see a lot of things decorate with gold, gems and the like. They do like sports though, many physical but they are also a big fan of strategy games.

(I can do more later but this is some basics.

[shomatoriashi]

11/26/24; 10:00pm

sylus x fem.reader (non mc)

[ minors don’t interact; by choosing to interact with this content, you have consented to viewing something n-fw despite the warnings. ]

notes: once a sylus girly, always a sylus girly…

admittedly, your first meeting with sylus occurred in a more… unorthodox manner.

that night, you had just gotten off a late shift at work, feeling the cool air cause slight shivers to course through you. you hug your coat tighter to your form all while taking in your surroundings.

as you kept walking, you became aware of a suspicious pair of footsteps that seemed to follow your every move.

when you stopped, the same lingering steps would stop as well.

each time you would turn a corner or dash to the other side of the street-

you swore you could feel the hairs raising at the back of your neck at the strange sensation of being watched and followed.

not wishing to lead this bastard straight to your apartment, your eyes take in the sight of the neon lights that flash above you, reading the name of the bar as you entered crow’s haven for the first time.

the bar was dimly lit with a surprising number of patrons all scattered throughout the area. as your eyes take in the lavish furniture and the expensive alcohol everyone was consuming, you slowly began to realize just how out of place you were while in this high class bar.

the sounds of doors opening makes you stiffen, with you looking back to see an unfamiliar man walk in, dark eyes scanning the bar before landing on your frozen form. letting out a string of curses, you turn away from the entrance and began heading deeper inside of the bar, your gaze finally landing on a tall man with silver locks of hair.

you take in the sight of his pristine, black and red suit and make a beeline toward him. your hands reach out to grab at the ends of the expensive fabric, earning you a momentary look of disdain from the man as he acknowledges you with a narrowed, crimson gaze.

“what’s this? has a kitten gotten lost and found her way into a crow’s lair?”

shivers were felt running down your spine at the sound of his rich voice felt reverberating in your ear. “s-sorry, but, i need your help. can you pretend to be my boyfriend, at least until that fucker backs off?”

the man immediately straightens his posture, towering over you as he stood well past 6 feet in height. he places a hand on your shoulder, already seeing the unknown man making his way toward you.

“didn’t i tell you how dangerous it is to talk to strangers, sweetie?” you allow him to take a protective stance in front of you, gazing at the man who stalked you with a bored expression.

“hey man, i don’t mean no harm, just wanted to talk to that pretty lady over there.” the man gestures at you, yet before he can take another step a sudden click was heard, causing your stalker’s eyes to go wide when he was suddenly faced with a barrel of a gun.

“she’s mine.” those final words rang with such finality that you nearly fell to your knees. have you ever met a man that exuded such confidence before in your life? a man who’s beauty could rival that of gods themselves-

no, absolutely not.

the man backs away while stuttering out excuses, and to add insult to injury, your savior merely snaps his fingers as several men surrounded your potential stalker before physically escorting him out of the club.

relief courses through you, and you watch as your savior returns his gun back into the confines of his suit. the bartender already tends to him, refilling his shot glass of whiskey. as you take a moment to calm down your rapidly beating heart, you carefully step aside, “ah, thank you… for helping me back there. i should… probably head home-“

he stops you from moving forward by gently gripping at your wrist, “i don’t think that’s a good idea, kitten. after all, if you leave my safety, then there’s a chance that he’s standing out there, waiting for you.” crimson eyes now shone with amusement while he downs his shot of whiskey in a single gulp, not even fazed by the burn of the alcohol, “and i’ve already told him that you’re mine, kitten.”

unable to speak, you watch as he leans forward to take your hand in his, pressing a kiss at the back of it before telling you, “the name’s sylus… and i don’t mind keeping you under my protection until things settle down. what do you say?”

truthfully, you would be a fool not to take him up on his offer.

which lead you to where you are now, where sylus has been your “fake boyfriend” for close to two years now.

and that fact made you feel so giddy and stupidly in love with him.

sunlight streams through the window, painting your shared bedroom in brilliant hues. too happy to sleep in, you had woken up first to prepare some breakfast in bed for sylus in celebration of your anniversary. with several breakfast items on the tray, you tiptoe into the room, your smile breaking into a grin upon seeing sylus sleeping on his chest.

setting off your tray of breakfast to the side, you crept closer to the bed, wishing to tease your beloved a bit this morning. doing a countdown in your head, you land against sylus’s back, earning a grunt from him as you littered his skin with a plethora of kisses.

“hehe, morning sysy…”

sylus lets out a series of grumbles, slowly turning around so that he was lying back in bed while taking you within his embrace. “hmph… you’re up early. and you’re hyper, too.”

you gasp, “i am not hyper! i’m just incredibly happy today… and you know what today is, so don’t even pretend.”

a rich chuckle fills your ears, making you shiver once more in response. despite the millions of times you have basked in his voice, you couldn’t seem to get used to it, as it still sent pleasant sensations to course through you.

“truly… thinking back on that night when we first met- i was scared. i didn’t want some creep to know where i lived-“

“and so the lost kitten made her way inside a crow’s lair, seeking shelter.” a devilish grin spreads across sylus’s lips when he presses a quick kiss against your lips, “and the crow took pity on her and made a promise to keep her safe.”

“yeah…” you trail off and smile at the memory. deep down, you knew you were drawn to sylus and could sense that he was more than capable of protecting you.

you didn’t regret meeting him at all.

shaking your head, you break out of your reveries and smile back at sylus, “that’s why, i really wanted to celebrate our two year anniversary together. i decided to start off by making some breakfast in bed for you.”

you gesture towards the desk, earning a pleased hum from sylus. “i must say, that’s very thoughtful of you, kitten. however… i hope you won’t be too upset when i tell you that the type of hunger i have cannot be satiated by something as simple as food.” he frames at your face, smirk seeming to widen when he captures a lock of your hair and twirls it against his fingertips, “in fact, what i crave for is something far more decadent.”

“huh? what do you mean?”

sylus simply shakes his head, “instead of answering with words, why don’t i show you with my actions?”

“oh… okay…?”

you trail off, feeling your lips turn dry when sylus moves down your body, settling himself between your legs as he pushes up the fabric of your oversized shirt. his crimson gaze focuses solely on you while he breathes in your scent, settling his lips against your inner thigh. keeping his eyes shut, he basks in your scent before using one of his hands to grip at the waistband of your panties.

already, you felt the moisture beginning to pool between your legs, your breathing slowly turning labored when sylus pulls your panties down the rest of the way using his teeth alone. amusement and desire paints his gaze as he meets your slicked core, taking in the scent of your honeyed arousal before delving into your walls with his tongue.

the wet muscles was felt pushing inside of you, giving you such a hedonistic friction that had to be sinful with how good it felt. your hands automatically go into his hair, and you found yourself pressing your aching sex even deeper against him. sylus was relentless when it came to tasting you, drinking up all you had to offer as he made sure that not even a single drop of your arousal fell against the sheets.

playing your body with a familiar expertise, your back arches against the mattress as your climax rushes out of you in waves, your gasps quickly morphing into broken moans of his name, earning a pleased grunt from the onychinus leader.

your mind was in a daze after such an intense release, yet you remained in such a muddled state even as sylus pulled you closer to him by your ankles. rapid movements were felt below you, and when you blearily looked to the side, you felt your walls clench in response to sylus rapidly stroking his cock to full hardness before he presses his mushroom tip against your entrance.

“you drive me crazy, kitten. ever since the moment i laid eyes on you, you were truly mine.” he completes his statement by fully thrusting into you, bottoming out while setting a rapid pace. your legs wrap around his waist as you felt a newfound urgency at reaching your completion with him. the squelching sounds of your lovemaking echoes throughout the room while sylus continues to press lingering kisses against your damp skin all while hotly whispering into your ear-

“happy anniversary, sweetie… let’s celebrate by never leaving this bed.”

end notes: an unedited thirst post that needs to be written for all of the sylus girlies out there (⺣◡⺣)♡

all stories are written by rei; please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works!!

[dilfartist]

Yandere Librarian Gale Dekarios

TW: Blackmail, stalking, dark themes, yandere themes, mentions of objectification, Gale is kind of a creep, Gale has a small shrine of you, heavy topics, possessiveness.

Reader description; Female/GN

Not proofread/proofread

After a while, life as a professor had begun to bore Gale. Magic is a passion of his and will never not be, but Gale yearned for more. As much as Gale enjoyed the little flashbacks of his childhood from how many accidental fires and ruined rooms at the university occurred; they were beginning to become too much. Gale found solace in silence. Back then, when Gale locked himself in his tower with every second of his life near the end, he enjoyed the stillness of his room, book in hand. So when the local library in Waterdeep required a new librarian on the weekends, Gale immediately decided to fill the role.

Gale had worked there for at least three months to test the waters and see how he felt about the job and his schedule. In that short period, he felt confident and decided to keep his job as a librarian.

Gale memorized each customer's face. Riley, the drow with white hair and pink tips at the ends, enjoyed books on nature, and her cat recently had kittens. Aoth, a human fighter part of the flaming fist, only checked out books on the history of Baldur's Gate training since he was still being trained and wanted to do his job right. Then there was Emily, the dwarf who only had time to visit the library on Tuesdays and didn’t stick around to chat with Gale. Then there was you. You were new around here, not only in the library but Waterdeep in general. Gale had seen you searching the shelves a few times but never had the pleasure of speaking with you. You didn't check out anything anyway. You merely looked through the books and then took your leave.

On one particular day, you decide to check out a book. You sauntered over to the main desk where Gale organized the recently returned books. Gale noticed you and smiled. You greeted each other then Gale took the novel you wanted to check out.

“Ah, I’ve read this a couple of times myself. Never gets old.”

You nod in agreement with a smile. Something about you seemed off. You looked on edge, your eyes avoiding Gales and you being awkward. You left after Gale stamped the first page of your book, informing you that it would need to be returned in two weeks.

You started taking home books more often after the encounter, becoming less awkward with the wizard with each interaction. Until one visit, you gained the courage to ask, “You’re Gale Dekarios, aren’t you?” Gale smiles and nods, “I suppose you’ve heard the tale of how I saved Baulder’s gate or my, uh, former condition.” You nod, “I’ve heard many stories of your amazing abilities or just stories of you in general.” Saying Gale was flattered was a bit of an understatement. From there on you and Gale started to chat. The conversation lasted so long that you had to step to the side for irritated customers to check their books out.

You became a favorite customer of Gale’s, possibly the number one. You came by the library more often, always starting a conversation with Gale that would last a bit too long. Not that Gale minded. Gale enjoyed your presence. Most customers would indulge in small talk for a little while and then awkwardly step away after too long, but you stayed and made great conversation.

Gale found himself feeling the same feeling he had with Mystra, the sick puppy love that caused him to be at her every command. The same love that nearly caused him to blow himself to pieces to have her favor again. However, there was something different. While, yes, Gale’s thoughts when with Mystra were mostly of her, his thoughts were consumed by you. Gale thought of it a bit strange but passed it off as possibly meeting his missing part.

Gale’s obsession deepened when you began when you became distant. Your visits to the library have begun to decline in the usual amount. Gale grew worried but told himself you were simply busy with life. When you finally visited the library to drop off a novel you’d been reading, Gale asked about your whereabouts. You grinned and told Gale of the new guy you’ve been going out with recently. Gale could swear his heart dropped down to the pit of his stomach. His smile faltered, and his skin drained of all color, leaving him pale. Gale played it off somehow, and you left vowing to visit your favorite friend more often. Gale felt so hurt. Even angry. Of course not at you, he felt angered by the man courting you. Besides you probably were being polite- that’s just how you are! If Gale gained the confidence to finally court you, you’d say yes out of politeness, and after a while, he’d show you why you ought to choose him as your eternal lover.

Though Gale isn’t proud of this, he has stalked you and your...lover- or could you even call the man that?! The man is too touchy for Gale's liking. He hates to suggest anything improper but the man’s eyes don’t linger on your face much, more on your body. Gale isn’t like that. He adores every part of you, body and soul.

Gale has impulses sometimes. He wants desperately to sneak off with a thing of yours. Of course, he is horrified by these thoughts. No gentleman acts this way to a lady. Despite the urge to walk over and grab the hair tie that dropped from your wrist and pocket it for himself, maybe even use it on himself to tie his hair. That hasn't stopped him from sneaking away with a quill that fell from your bag that he uses constantly.

When you and your...”lover” decide to date, Gale is more than upset. Gale puts a plan into action to separate you too. Sends a few letters to you in your lover's handwriting calling you names. However, it isn’t random insults but rather insults he’s heard from your lover himself said behind your back. When you confront him about the letters, your lover is only baffled you know what he had said, so he thinks twice before responding, which only makes him look worse.

If that isn’t enough, Gale has other ways. Gale sends notes to his subordinates with blackmail on him and some dirty lies. The ruined reputation causes your lover stress. The stress develops into a short fuse that later causes many fights between the two of you. In the end, you couldn't handle all of the negativity and decided to break off the relationship.

You return to the library with your head hanging low. You attempt to greet Gale without your sorrows peeking through. However, Gale was very observant. He gently asks what’s worrying you. Gale is so comforting with his presence, words, and all. You explain your situation to him, to which he listens attentively.

“Don’t worry, (Name). There are many men out there waiting to be there for you. Keep looking, sometimes true love is in plain sight.”

[jigglypuff1994]

Thank you for the rec @uptoolateart! I feel honored to be included!

This was the original prompt: Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

Oh gosh, I don't have five fics yet, but I do have a fun time writing and soon, I will have many, many more. Lots of things in the works!!

But here's my library so far:

The Devil Wears Gabriel

One of my WIPs. This is a fun one for me! I've seen The Devil Wears Prada no less than fifty times, and I will never not watch it. One of my favorite comfort films.

I watched it back in March '24 and thought 'OMG. Miranda Preistly is Gabriel Agreste.' And it kind of spiraled from there. When I dove into the plot, it felt very crackish, and I grabbed onto that with two hands and rode with it.

I also didn't understand the importance of a beta until I met mine midway through this fic. She is wonderful and funny, and I couldn't live without her. Jodi, if you had a tumblr, I would tag you so hard.

Summary:

Being Ladybug is no easy task; she is the leader of Team Miraculous and keeps peace throughout Paris. Other than the weekly akuma attacks, her main problem is keeping Chat Noir and Viperion under control and out of each other’s jealous hairs. Sometimes, she misses the old days when it was just her and her kitty.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng has recently graduated university and lives in Paris with her steady boyfriend of a few years, Luka Couffaine. After interviewing for a position she doesn't want in the first place, she ends up working as Gabriel Agreste’s assistant.

Between akumas, a narcassistic boss, and the men fighting for her attention, how will she survive the next year of her life?

past grievances

This one was inspired by the talented Christopher Nolan. I absolutely love the Nolan Batman Dark Knight series and DC in general (don't get me started on Young Justice, I won't shut up). And maybe one day I'll tiptoe through the window into the MLB/Bat fam fic world, but for now, I have my murder mystery fic.

I don't know where it really struck me, but I hadn't seen many MLB murder mysteries, so I felt compelled to write one in Felix's POV.

Also, I have a soft spot for antiheroes and comebacks, so, if that's up your alley, I have a tale for you.

Summary:

After the body of Adrien Agreste is discovered, Paris is in mourning.

After retracing Adrien’s last steps, Felix discovers more than he bargained for. He learns his cousin had a secret. One that leads him to his grave.

With this newfound discovery, Felix realizes that running away again isn’t going to work this time around. He needs to know what happened to Adrien.

While working through his own past grievances with his former teammates and through his own soul searching, he tries to mend himself, atone for his past mistakes and find Adrien's killer.

Bitten Smitten Kitten

I don't know what to say about this one. I am a vampire girlie at heart. I'm also a sucker for romance, smut and angst.

It's got it all: kidnapping, love, lust, clan vampire warfare, all of those tropes in 21k words.

I actually had the ending ambiguous at first, but I'm a big old softy at heart and had a couple commentors wanting more, so I wrote an additional chapter (it's fluffy and smutty *spoilers*)

Summary:

Born an orphan, Adrien was alone in this world. When the Black plague invaded Paris in the fourteenth century, at nineteen years old, Adrien became ill. On death's door, he was offered a second chance of life by a vampire with a kind heart, Emilie Agreste. Accepting her deal, Adrien found a family of his own with her vampire clan, the Agrestes.

After losing his eternal wife to vampire hunters, Gabriel became obsessed with finding the 'blood of luck'. When consumed by a vampire, the blood type is said to give a vampire unlimited power and is the key to ruling the underworld. Sending his adopted son on covert missions to find the human with this blood type, Gabriel was determined in finding the 'blood of luck'.

Transforming into a small black cat called Chat Noir, Adrien found the human who holds this special blood, Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

The only problem? He fell in love with her.

Now Adrien has to choose between the love of his life and his clan.

Can Adrien hide this secret from his clan or will fate intervene when all hell breaks loose?

The Treaty of Miraculous Nature

This is my first fic ever. It's my baby, my first, my beloved.

If I'm honest, everyone needs to start somewhere, and my writing journey has been an adventure. I've learned a lot overtime and sure, there are some plot points or scenes I could have fleshed out more, but I'm proud of where I started and where I am now.

This fic will always hold a special place in my heart. (and maybe someday will have a sequel that I teased)

Summary:

Prince Adrien daydreams of a life of adventure and romance outside of the palace walls.

Marinette Dupain is a commoner who dreams of becoming an aspiring seamstress and designer for the Royal Court.

Soon the two soulmates are thrust together as fate has intended, bestowing them with jewels of magic from a goddess which allows them to transform and wield powerful magic of creation and destruction.

However, with good, there is always evil. Things may not appear as they seem.

Which brings the greatest age old question: can love conquer all?______________________________________________________________

As part of the ask, please spread the love and include more fic writers! I nominate: @ladynoirfanao3 @hamsteriffic @talkstoself @coffeebanana @chatnia-starlight @wisteriasymphony @aidanchaser

[kickthecan-revolution]

Mr. Peach, aka “big Jim” (James the Giant Peach) is still here. The rescue said she’d take him after he healed from his surgery. I called, I texted - no reply. I ended up at my vet’s house Saturday night, he and his partner invited me to their daughter’s second birthday party (and I showed up, another miracle). She was supposed to be there but didn’t come which felt strange. The next day, I finally texted my vet’s partner (who manages the operations for their mobile vet company), I asked her if A (rescue owner as well as an employee) was ok, that I’d not heard from her. That I didn’t want my vet to know, as she was his employee and her rescue should be separate from that. I learned that over the weekend, A had gotten several kittens she’d found homes for returned, and she was overwhelmed.

When I tell you the panic. It was a Thing.

I texted A letting her know I’d heard about her situation and that we were fine here and I’d check back in next week, she called and we talked for a while. I love her commitment to always taking a cat back if it doesn’t work. She’s new to all of this and I’m not going to pile on to adding another cat in her parents’ house where her dad isn’t a fan of all of this to begin with. There’s an adoption event that I’m going to bring him to this Saturday. I put an ad up on Next Door.

I’m not going to talk about the melt down I had after we hung up, into that evening. What I will say is how thankful I am for this experience, for all the purging of pain and fear I’m experiencing, old old old stuff that has clouded my judgment and my beliefs about others, and myself.

The next morning I woke up and dreaded going into Peach’s room for hours to play with him, then come out and play with the others, then back in with Peach at night. I realized how my entire life, I never made a move if the person in front of me was sad/angry/displeased with me. I froze - calculated- and shifted however I needed to so that would stop. The entirety of my focus has been watching others and reacting so I’d stay connected, not rejected, not alone, not hated.

The rage of that - of those in my life not being willing to look past the glittery, funny, storytelling persona - engulfed me. The anger of no one being interested enough to go deeper - wanting to know me well enough, so they just accepted what was mostly just bullshit- the grief of that - was intense.

Something in me cleared and shifted. The constant worry about these cats - the panic at their reaction, the worry of Peach behind that closed door - it was my sole focus. This is all me, projecting so much onto them. In a good mood when things are peaceful and everyone seemed chill and rhen slammed into despair and panic and tears at the slightest altercation, desperate for help. So the answer to that was to separate them all and force that peace.

But *I* wasn’t peaceful, that meant splitting my time up in that small room with him trying to keep him entertained vs my life outside of it where all I was doing was worrying about him. More of the same, abandoning myself for someone else’s experience, convinced that their experience was the key to me staying alive, having love, being liked. Being ok. Feeling almost sick inside with worry and fretting. Putting them into the core of me being alive and surviving that day. I’ve been consumed by this for two months, almost three.

So I just opened up all of the doors. I don’t want anymore closed doors in my home, I don’t want that experience anymore. As long as Peach is here, the doors are going to be open. Not to the outside, so the big girls will be on a schedule to be on the deck. I slid my experience up to the front of my mind, and prioritized it. The voice inside, “you selfish asshole, putting these cats in harm, what are you doing?” started screaming. I told it to leave. I pushed it away each time it showed me something terrible that might happen. I told it to leave. I kept saying “fuck this, fuck you. Go away.” I didn’t let the big girls outside, I wasn’t going to do that thing where I let them in and out, in and out, in and out. Stay in and deal with it.

In the midst of the hissing, growling, trilling (that was Peach, so excited to be with the cats), I started cleaning. I’ve neglected my space these last two months, just doing the basics like dishes, etc. so I put things away, cleaned the refrigerator, hung clothes up, swept, took tons of garbage out I’d kept on the side deck. I did laundry , straightened my room. I was done worrying about it. As Shirley said, no one is going to die. No one has died. Then we all took a nap I my room, Buddy and Minnie on the bed and Peach underneath it (he tried to get up a few times and they were not having it). Peace. On my terms. Because this is my house. A new frontier gained.

The strength of that moment is not something I can put into words. It was the Diane that was never able to really leave her mom to go be with friends or OUT LIVING, discovering who she was because her mom would be by herself in that horrible house with that horrible man alone, how dare she go have fun when her mom was so sad, alone. Maybe in danger without her to be her comfort and protector. It’s the Diane who would do everything to make her mom less sad, less angry, less upset so her mom wouldn’t disappear into her room with a migraine, incapacitated, in so much pain she was suicidal. That Diane put herself first yesterday, and did it again this morning. And will do so everyday until the universe shows the path for Peach.

I’m so grateful for this experience. For Shirley, helping me see when I am just purging, being my spiritual companion and guide through this process. Helping me understand that these cats are all just mirrors for what I need to heal and grow. I don’t really even talk about her much because of how out there this is, more than once it’s come to me that this is scam and she’s is kind of crazy and I’ve allowed someone nuts significant access to my mental well being. But then I come back to the impact - the growth, the clarity, overcoming so many fears - and I know all of this has been designed for me and my continued growth. So this morning, there are happy tears, grateful tears. I’m proud of myself. And I am thankful to Peach for coming here and helping me.

[cryptidsurveys]

Wednesday, August 21st, 2024.

What was the last gift you received? I believe it was an assortment of Easter chocolates from my mom.

Ten years ago, who was your best friend? Are you still best friends now? Oliver, and yes, we're still best friends.

What are some of your comfort foods? My comfort foods greatly overlap with my "safe foods," so things like oatmeal, yogurt bowls, mixed veggies with sriracha sauce, and giant salads.

What’s something that’s very popular, that you have no interest in? Superhero movies. <- Same. In general, I feel like I'm out of the loop when it comes to popular things. Even niche popular things, tbh. I will occasionally catch a reference, but that's about it. I very much have my own little realm of interests.

What’s something that many people would consider to be lame, but you don’t? I don't think many people would consider these things lame, but maybe they just aren't as interested in them as I am. Subjects such as history, philosophy, religion, outer space, sci-fi, conspiracies, etc.

Have you ever lost your house key? I probably have at some point.

How would you describe your clothing style? Dangerously bordering on pajamas. ;D

The last time you were in a line, what were you waiting for? Snacks at the movie theater.

What’s your favorite city in your own country? I'm not much of a city person (I much prefer woodsy, rural, mountainous areas), but as far as places I've visited, San Francisco.

What’s your favorite city in another country? I've never been to another country before, but I could actually see myself enjoying a trip to Tokyo, Japan. For some reason, that city just feels…different.

Are there any very common foods/drinks that you pretty much never consume? Soda, plain milk, seafood, hot dogs, sushi…

What kind of device are you taking this survey on? A desktop computer.

What’s the most expensive thing you own? My car.

When was the last time you had a package delivered, and what was it? I think it was some solar-powered string lights. I've been meaning to hang them up around the window in my bedroom; I've just been too lazy or distracted to bother.

Do you typically respond to text messages right away? Not unless they require an immediate response (such as being called in to the shelter). Otherwise, I have a tendency to procrastinate.

What has been the highlight of this past month? Animal shelter stuff, the kitten saga (I don't know if I've mentioned it here yet, but we found his home! <3), going to a movie with my mom, and all the rain we've been getting.

Has anyone ever assumed you were flirting with them, when you weren’t? I guess it's possible.

What types of stores do you enjoy browsing? Walmart, Big Lots, thrift stores, Barnes & Noble…basically anywhere with books or inexpensive home goods/clothing.

Did your parents spoil you when you were a kid? We were comfortably middle class, but I wouldn't say I was spoiled.

Would you rather watch a movie in the theater, or at home? I've actually been enjoying watching them in theaters these days.

What were you doing one hour ago? I was in therapy.

Have you ever used public transportation to get to work? I haven't.

What do you miss the most from before Covid times? This isn't specifically related to Covid, but I do miss when things weren't so tense and divisive.

What has been the best thing to happen to you in the past year? I've said it so many times now that I'm even starting to annoy myself. ;D

Who do you have listed as emergency contacts in your phone? I don't have anyone listed as an emergency contact. But the only people I have programmed in there at all are my mom and dad, so hopefully someone will get the picture.

Are you prone to jealousy? Less so than in the past, but still to some degree. I think I'm just better at recognizing it now and reacting appropriately.

How did you get through the lowest point in your life? I just…survived, I guess. Like literally - that's it. I dearly wished for death, but my body simply refused to give up. But life doesn't stay static forever, so things eventually improved enough to allow for more than mere survival.

Have you ever been someone’s first love? Yeah.

Have you ever played frisbee golf? Yeah.

What is your favorite silly, feel-good movie? I don't have one.

How old were you when you got your first gaming console, and what kind was it? I think my parents already had the original Nintendo when I was born, so I'll go with the N64, which I think we got for Xmas when I was around 6-7?

Who in your family has the coolest job? My parents are both retired. Last I knew, my sibling wasn't working. I guess I'm the only one who is sort of working, even if it is on a volunteer basis. I think working at an animal shelter is pretty darn cool, though, not gonna lie.

Is cereal technically a soup? I saw somewhere that a vanilla soy latte is basically a three bean soup. ;D

Have you found your first gray hairs yet. Yeah.

What is something that drains your energy really quickly? Negative social interactions (when people are really angry, grumpy, etc). On the flipside, positive social interactions can supercharge me.

Did you parents teach you how to make a budget before you moved out on your own? I haven't moved out on my own yet.

What is your favorite food to put gravy on? Mashed potatoes, turkey, stuffing…basically, a classic Thanksgiving dinner.

Do you know anyone from Canada? No.

What’s your opinion on astrology? Love any opportunity to blame some bullshit on """the stars""".

Do you use TikTok? No.

What do you have going on the rest of the day? I'm going to make some art after this, then have lunch, then housecleaning, then…idk, we'll see how this headache is holding up by then.

[ajoytobeheld]

Another bandwagon I jumped on too late

June 18th, 2009

I have not inflicted my irreverent ramblings onto this page in a while, and I am sorry for that, it is largely due a disease I have come down with called Twilightitis. It is a rare and troublesome problem which tends to target teenage girls and it has many symptoms, the main affliction being the inability to form coherent thoughts which do not relate to the forbidden love between a klutz and a vampire.

But of course I jest, Twilightitis is neither a real or clever made up disease, instead it is a contagious and stupid obsession with a series of books which has effected my life and the lives of other women I know. Sadly these are intelligent women who have read novels with long words and abstract ideas but somehow they can’t help themselves with the coke like substance that it the absolute twaddle of Stephanie Meyer…

Here are some problems I have with this book, which briefly took, over my life. If you have read the series I would like to hear back how it has effected you and your general existance.

(WARNING CONTAINS SPOILERS, ONE HARRY POTTER SPOILER AND UNSUBSTANTIATED RANTS)

Everytime I purchased the next instalment (like the day after finishing the first one), I would find myself in a book shop desperately searching for the the M bit of the teenage fiction section. I could never find it or bring myself to ask the staff to point out the direction in which it lived due to deep and burning all consuming shame. I felt so dirty because deep down I knew it was just pages of inane dialogue, repeated descriptions and a plot threaded together with ideas from other superior books with a underlying unsubtle message of “sex is bad before marriage you naughty teenagers.” Yet somehow I was addicted to Bella and Edward’s stupid love..

The whole imprinting thing was a little bit dodgy in places, all these grown werewolf men falling in love with 4 year olds was a bizarre sentiment to write about, seemingly made justifiable because they wouldn’t touch them until they were of age, just act like their over friendly uncle for ten years….  That’s not really better.

I found myself joining the facebook group “Twilight give’s me unrealistic expectations of men,” because none of my boyfriends have saved my life a billion times and bought me cars and got me into dartford whilst being able to fly and that.

The message of complete obsession with someone in your first relationship when you are 18 is maybe not a good one to give out to teenagers, particularly the whole “we can’t be together, suicide it is!” parts.

I thought Bella should have just had sex with Jacob or Mike or all of the other guys that fancied her, they could at least have satisfied her hormonal urges without possibly killing her and she could have spread her wild oats about a tiny bit before deciding to get married at 19….they could have put in a slutty interlude. 

I was meant to buy the fact that Edward was a vampire who use to eat people and like a serial killer who knits pictures of kittens, he has the skewed morality to not want to do the naked funky chicken until they were married.

Bella spent most of the novels falling over, wanting to kill herself in place of everyone else and gazing at Edward longingly wondering why he would love someone as plain and boring as her.

I wondered that too.

I Stayed up til four in the morning to get to the sex scene only to discover that in it’s place was a blank space followed by a post-coital waking. In my delirious state I wondered if I had been doing it wrong, or whether he punched her and took advantage.

I just wished Bella would die.

She should really just have died.

In fact they all should have.

Why didn’t the other vampires just tell her to fuck off?

I found myself wondering if Miss Meyer realised that there are only so many times she could describe Edwards perfectly smooth chizzled white chest, and how he traced Bella’s jawline with kisses or ran his fingers through her hair before she may be repeating herself/satisfying herself.

I know there are others who found it good/good instead of good/bad, as I did, but I hope we can all agree the ending was the biggest cop put in the world, with the whole thing building up to a fight to the death and then…. nothing. Everyone goes home. It’s all cool. Not one unnecessary death in the entire thing? Even one of the twins died in Harry Potter? What about Emmet, he did bugger all! Ok, calmed down. Rant ends. I apologize.

p.s

New Moon Trailer!

[mead0ws06]

it says go ahead and put anything. So I’m putting anything.

I believe that as we grow older we hide within our flaws instead of chipping at them. We lose the desperation to become a good person and instead focus on simply being and going through the check boxes. I believe that we should never be understood absolutely because then we’d never surprise others, and isn’t that always a nice feeling. When you’re left alone you don’t owe anything to anyone and instead are left with the influence they have had on your way of thinking yet they are not physically there. I went to a bookstore today and saw the poetry book my English teacher let me borrow. I almost bought me a copy and instead I bought a manga instead, Bungo Stray Dogs Beast vol 3. Akutagawa’s sister believed him a selfish man yet all he wanted was to be better, yet his mind is a haunted place and didn’t allow him to see past his own anguish and rage. Atsushi is run by fear, something so strong it runs his entire life. I think rain is a way to remember how small we actually are, and thunder is to help us remember we have a heartbeat and it can skip when faced with Mother Nature. I make Playlists that I promise are going to be good quality and then stuff it with songs I found myself listening to, and I put them in not because it was accurate but because I wanted to listen to it in a new light. I own more books now than I ever have in my entire life. I wax poetry but only in the dead of night when I feel like I’m breathing recycled blood and I spit it out onto my notes app, which blinds me when no one else has eyes on me. I fall in love with characters and see them as myself to gain understanding of who I am and to feel less lonely in the world. If someone wrote that character, they must understand that character, therefore if I ever were to met the author maybe I could see if they would understand me, even if I never spoke a word to them the knowledge of the Maybe is good enough. I crave to talk endlessly to my friends yet feel as if I’ll be eaten alive by my own flesh and walls if I so much as utter a word about passion and love. I’m proud of being 5’9 even if I’m just barely making it to that height. I have a pixie cut and I love my wild curls. Cats just had a liter of kittens in my barn, the mother being pixie and the kittens being mulberry, magnolia, and ceder. I feel different to others how I see the world, how I understand and feel about challenges because I’ve been facing them since before I understood what family was. I was so desperate for love when I was in middle school that I screamed my affections at anyone who will listen, now I see the notifications and all I can feel is my own breathing and not others hearts. I’m 17 and struggling with the idea that I’ll still be unsure of who I am and what to do when I’m an adult. That I’ll still be wearing headphones to block out others on a long car ride, that I’ll still lack social grace and run up to my room whenever I get home without placating others like a good adult is expected to do. I consume stories with the infatuation of someone finding their first love over and over. I can analyze stories for hours yet can’t find it in myself to brush my teeth. I used to think my middle name was gorgeous now all I see is it’s common, and I laugh. I’m a straight A student and can’t will myself to study for my permit test.

[pazodetrasalba]

Kitten Tiles

Dear Caroline:

I would agree that this assessment seems a bit unfair, and would have to read more about. In your next you mentioned it came from a book by Bernard Williams, which makes sense: I am aware that he was a very staunch anti-utilitarian, and have some curiosity to read his arguments in more detail. A priori, it would definitely sound like a very nice world the one in which defending the status quo meant doing the most good for the most people...

And yet the example you created here for comical purposes does make me think in the obsession (from my pov) of Utilitarianism with quantifying, indistinctness and interchangeability of its pleasure-and-pain experiencing units. A whole universe tiled with blissful, opiate-consuming kittens seems like an apt self-parody, and not that distant from the supposedly absurd paperclipping maximizer of Yudkowsky's nightmares. Myself, I am keener on other types of infinite tiling, like Penrose's or the different tessellations of the hyperbolic plane.

The image, in fact, brought to mind the jayflies in one of our (relatively) recent common lectures: the Venomous Lumpsucker. From a purely utilitarian perspective, they would be the apex of creation: a being who experiences absolute and unconceivable bliss during its short life, and clearly outgunning humans under any metric one could envisage (and even more so when one thinks on the numbers!), and a better fit than barely happy lizards for the Repugnant Conclusion.

These issues of population ethics and morality are really fascinating, but also really frustrating, as even after thinking (marginally) hard about them, and humans having been doing so for centuries, it seems that so little clear progress has been made (arguably, what I have just said applies to the whole field of Philosophy as such). Like I feel there's a broken mathematical analogy at play here, with a mapping of sentient individuals to the Real number line and the set ℝ. And like in calculus, adding infinitesimals leads to many divergent series that blow up to infinity.

Dunno, probably I am just too parochial and self-serving, but I can't help feelings there's some incommensurability here at work, in which we just can't adequately square conflicting and equally valid formulations on the value of groups and individuals, and of sophisticated and complex civilizations and their achievements versus humbler but (in some sense) equally precious creatures.

Quote:

When I first discovered the Penrose tiles, I was playing around with a single kite and a single dart. I was looking at the ways you could arrange these shapes with various symmetries, when I realized that they could be put together in such a way as to make a pattern that never repeats, but is still perfectly ordered. It was an exciting moment for me, because I knew I had found something really new and interesting.

Roger Penrose

[dracharenae]

✹ —  ιяивяи || נαιмє ℓαииιѕтєя ::

A child — all the realms and all the people therein should have seen her as such, yet prisoner, hostage, heir, a kingdom’s worth of ransom were all that was held over her head, even in the eyes of the Martells. Peasants saw their children and their family as their own, for better or worse.. either kin to hold dear or be traded for a copper. High lords and ladies treated their own as possessions.. things, not people, to claim and starts wars over.

Even if she was a Tyrell, a Stark, a Waters, a Sand, Rhaenys was a child who should have only known joy. Jaime felt a mad sane man surrounded by another wave of King Aerys, and his sentimentality ( or general moral emotions ) spoke volumes. He was not a man of pure heart, though he and few others recognized the ugliness of the political dealings. Between feeding a child in Flea Bottom and filling his goblet with the finest wine, or half decent wine, Jaime would choose the wine. It had been the difference between he and the loved Rhaegar, and only man lived… Many greedy men lived.

As long as Rhaenys was kept alive however, the Lannister knew there was hope for something more beyond the stone walls of King’s Landing and the stench of poverty wafting over the city. Lions and vipers did not mix, but if several managed to sneak into the castle.. Jaime @irnbrn would be bothered to draw his sword. Thoughts such as those consumed his mind since Rhaenys was found alive while her mother and brother faced a terrible fate. The sworn brother cleared his mind with a deep inhalation and allowed a modest chuckle to pass through his mouth.

Why had he not been present to see the incident she referred to? It was for the best mayhaps, elsewise Jaime would have found himself doubled over with laughter. With hands free of gauntlets, a palm settled atop of her small head to ruffle dark hairs. He withdrew his hand seconds later and brought himself to his feet. The white and gold armor he donned clattered as body casually walked about before he settled in a lounging chair. Nothing was more uncomfortable than attempting to be comfortable in full armor.

     ❛Septas either believe their wards are stubborn mules or a lame and loyal dog. My septas thought much of the same of me as septa Myrtell thinks of you. I always wondered as a child, they act like their duty is the most horrid thing, so why even become a septa? ❜  They were too ugly to become whores or pillow girls, and there were plenty of ugly whores in the world. Jaime kept that bit of insight to himself.

     ❛  I’ve been informed one of the barn cats has created a nest and given birth to four kittens. The stable boy nearly drowned the poor things, but he was reminded that cats are preferable to rats. Would paying them a visit brighten a sluggish day, Rhaenys? ❜  

✹   —   SER JAIME EXTENDS A HAND, TUSSLING THE the thick curls of ebony hair which hang around her shoulders. at once the former princess moves from the touch, casting the golden knight a scolding glare - albeit a playful one - and proceeds to gently bat at his hand in return. even still, there is a teasing smile adorning her mouth. day by day, rhaenys is ceaselessly reminded how she has no friends within these halls. she is a ghost within her own family's castle, if even that. she is a prize and a trophy, the greatest robert baratheon likely could ever have hoped to gain. he had killed her father at the trident and robbed her of her mother and brother. he took her title, her family, and her name. he might have taken her life, too, were it not for her value . . . far better it is, indeed, to keep such a hostage alive. a dragon princess, now a bastard viper, is best left kept within her cage rather than buried beneath the earth. within these halls, she is a hostage. a burden. she has no friends here, save for one.

it is most ironic that rhaenys has found friendship in lord tywin's son. perhaps rhaenys would have sought to hate the kingslayer for being born a lion once, yet his title is reason enough to care for him. he killed her grandfather. rhaenys had no love for the old man . . . he was cruel and terrorized her endlessly. he burnt men, laughing as they died. rhaenys could not raise even an ounce of granddaughter love towards the man. she is glad he is dead. she is glad it was ser jaime who did it. and she is glad to have him as her friend, as her ally. as is, so far he's the only one she has left.

" i think they become septas because they can be cruel in the name of duty. who is going to argue with a child's caregiver, after all ? ? ? surely they know best. but my septa knows about the same as a dung beadle . . . even i know a great deal of things more so than her. i know the great histories of my dynasty . . . and she can barely keep track of their names. " rhaenys shrugs, popping another piece of chocolate covered fruit into her mouth. the taste is explosively sweet and it draws a genuine smile to her. " but i hate her as much as she hates me. so it is no loss. "

rhaenys has long since cared about whether or not someone likes or approves of her. if her septa so chooses to hold her in utter contempt, far be it from rhaenys to stop her. in fact, she welcomes it. let the old bag hate and resent her. it shall be all the sweeter in the future, when rhaenys makes the decision to take care of the old woman herself. shave her head bald, perhaps. hide dung in her bed. perhaps she can even hide poison ivy into her perfume. surely it would be doable. and, undoubtedly, it is an act of revenge to be met with some measure of consequence, but rhaenys shall simply have to prepare for that, too.

rhaenys' thoughts of haggard septas comes to a screeching halt, however, when ser jaime brings up a most delightful prospect; kittens. her brows raise and the curious look in her eyes becomes hopeful. " i expect i should like nothing more, ser jaime. "

[onmyyan]

A/N: This was requested on my quotev, sorry if he’s OOC this is my first time writing this fine mf😤

T/W:cannon typical violence

Yan!Akaza x Demon!Reader

He turned you, despite his vow to never consume a woman’s flesh.

Fighting is foreplay.

Very much true romantic.

gives you flowers every day.

learns how to paint so he can paint your face.

brings you the head of anyone you want.

You bring back a certain echo of humanity in him.

Night Dates that last as long as the sun remains hidden, then continue inside the small cabin he’d ‘casually found empty’.

If you have a problem with killing he will adjust.

And by that I mean kill when your out of eyeshot.

That becomes a game unbeknownst to you, how much he can get away with before you catch him.

If you ever do, He’ll simply turn on the charm, he has a way about him, almost hypnotic, it’s always worked too good on you, now would be no different.

If you don’t mind however-

Rip everyone and anyone around, would go a little something like this (TW/gore mentioned They are man eating demons y’all you can skip if you wanna )

⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️

The air was almost hot with the smell of blood, your clothes drenched in the evidence of you and your lovers date night meal.

The once lively home was now still, beside the panting man beside you, never one to play with his food, he shook off the remaining flesh from his clawed fingers and held a hand in your direction, gently beckoning you closer.

��My light, you’re so far from me.” He all but pouted, his clawed hand doing a grabby motion, demanding your presence.

You rolled your eyes at the theatrics of the man, who only moments ago was tearing into someone. It took a few steps to reach his outstretched limb, he effortlessly twirled you into his arms, face buried in your neck. “Much better no? Doesn’t it just feel-hmmm-so right?” He’d taken you from your life before yes, but in the same breath he’d given you a new one, a real shot at the life you’d always dreamed about from your farms porch. 

He stumbled upon you one fateful night, wounded and on the run from a nasty battle with a certain fire wielding Hashira, he thoughtlessly snuck in your living room. And by snuck I mean he busted in the window then slid into a squatted position.

”Oh-Your bleeding.” He heard a soft voice call from a room just off to his right, there you stood, wide eyed and coming closer a rag in your hands. 

“Does it hurt?” He expected screams like usual, instead he was left silenced, he shook his head no at the glowing little human before him, a small smile curving on his lips at her peculiar behavior. 

“A strange man bursts in your home at this hour and your only questions are about his well-being?” He nearly laughed to himself at the notion, how strange humans were. “I was going to get to the other questions eventually!” You defended yourself with hot cheeks, a grin had permanently etched itself into his face at your antics, the moment only broken by the sound of a shaky older man’s voice suddenly calling out. “Keep away from my daughter beast- (Y/n) get back in your room now!” The tears in your fathers voice kept your frozen before the stranger, who at the unfortunate new arrival, finished healing and gently turned your frozen face to look at him.

”Listen to the old man sweet (Y/n).” He all but purred your name, softly ushering you back towards your room, despite how hard you fought him on the way, all he saw was a little kitten throwing a fit.

The moment he closed the door you were fighting against it, desperately clawing your away to your family, air seemed to escape you as you beat against the wood, eventually black dots began to swim in your vision and before long sleep had taken you to the floor, a fact you were grateful for as you slept through their screams.

”Your mind took you away from me, I wonder where you went?” His honey coated voice brought you back to reality, still tightly bound to his chest.

”Nowhere important.” Your saccharine words matched the blissful look on your face, yes he had caused you pain, but it was so long ago now all that remained was your love for him. 

A small chuckle left his lips, the kiss he placed on your temple was cold, and sent a shiver up your spine. “You make eternity worthwhile my love.”

[jcwriting]

There’s A First Time For Everything

summary ↬ namjoon has never had a blowjob before. you’re about to change that.

pairing ↬ idol!namjoon x reader

genre ↬ smut, pwp (im not kidding there is zero plot to this), fluff, (new) established relationship 

word count ↬ 2.8k

warnings ↬ swearing, oral (m receiving), face fucking, choking, reader has a painful thigh kink (don’t we all), overuse of the word thigh

authors note ↬ listen,,,,i saw that picture of namjoon in shorts (you know the one) and i just,,,lost it. also, this is my first time posting fic for bts and im shitting bricks about it so pls be nice to me!!!!! i hope you enjoy this quick (thirsty) little ode to namjoon’s thighs. pls let me know what you think!

also, the gif above haunts me. everyday. okay, enjoy.

“I want to give you a blowjob.”

Namjoon choked on the swig of water he had just taken. The two of you were watching TV. Actually, Namjoon was watching TV. You were sitting on the floor at the coffee table with your laptop out to answer some work emails. But, you were distracted. Specifically by Namjoon’s shorts. More specifically, Namjoon’s thighs in said shorts. The smooth golden skin was begging for your lips and your fingers itched to scratch your nails down to his knees. Then, your eyes naturally glided further up to the apex of his thighs. Where you knew his cock was resting. Again, just begging to be in your mouth. The thought of your jaw and throat aching while he lost it above you consumed your mind. All hope was lost then.

“You…um. Sorry. You want to do that?”

You cocked your head to the side. “Uh, yeah. Wait, did you want me to ask? I’ll ask. Can I give you a blowjob? Please?”

Namjoon chuckled. “No, no. You don’t have to ask. It’s just, y’know, are you sure?”

“Yes,” you said slowly. What was he not getting? “Do you not want one?”

“No! No, oh my god. I want that. I definitely want that. That’s not the issue.”

“Then, what is?”

Namjoon blew out a breath that fluttered the hair that rested on his forehead. He cupped the back of his neck and rubbed awkwardly. “I’ve never had someone do that to me before. So-”

“What?” You would have been less shocked if he had told you that he was a closeted furry. The two of you had only been dating for about a month so the in-depth what things did your ex do in bed conversation hadn’t been fully fleshed out yet. You knew he had lost his virginity to his previous girlfriend and they had had a healthy sex life, so you had just assumed that him receiving oral was part of that. Yet…this man, this absolute Adonis of a man had never gotten his cock sucked? It was the most absurd thing you had ever heard in your life. “Hold on. You had a girlfriend before me, right? She didn’t go down on you? Ever?”

Namjoon looked like he wanted the couch to swallow him whole but you barely noticed. You were too busy experiencing the shock of your fucking life. “I did. But she - uh, no. She didn’t want to and I didn’t want to pressure her.”

Your heart melted a little before you shut your laptop. Healthy sex life your ass. You were sucking this mans dick and that was final. “I’m going to give you a blowjob, Namjoon. Right now.” You turned to him and began crawling forward. His eyes flew to your ass that swayed in the air and he audibly swallowed. “If you don’t want me to then you need to tell me within the next thirty seconds.”

“Oh God,” he whimpered and spread his legs a little wider. You were salivating. “Yes. As long as you’re sure-” Whatever he was going to say was cut off by a heavy groan as your hands slid up his thighs. Finally, you smiled to yourself as you bent your fingers and allowed your nails to dig into the meat of his inner thigh.

“I have a thing for your thighs,” you murmured. “Never realized I had a thigh kink until I met you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I want to ride your thighs. Will you let me?”

“God, yes.” Namjoon went to reach for your arms but you batted his hands away. This wasn’t about you right now. This was about him. You reached for your hair and quickly pulled it into a sloppy bun. His eyes followed your movements and you didn’t miss how the bulge in his shorts twitched.

“I need you to tell me if I do something that you don’t like, okay? I want to make you feel good. Don’t be afraid to talk to me. If you like something, let me know. If not, then definitely let me know.” Namjoon nodded feverishly. His eyes were almost black and his chest was straining against his white top. You smirked to yourself. This was going to be fun.

Bending down, you pressed a kiss to the top of his thigh. Your mouth dragged along his skin and you relished in the way he quivered beneath you. Following the seam of his leg before doing the same on the other. Nails pressed little crescent moons into his flesh before your thumbs smoothed over the marks. Your nose lifted the loose material of his shorts up to his hips and skimmed the exposed areas as your tongue reached out to flick the little freckle that found a home on his hip before you set your sights on his dick that was straining for you. Lips that had previously kissed his skin now moved to the fabric that jailed his heavy cock. Sitting back, your thumb traced the underside of his dick softly before you barely brushed over the head. The cotton dragged against your finger and Namjoon huffed loudly before lifting his hips further into your touch.

“Don’t tease.” Namjoon’s voice had lowered a few octaves and the deep tone had you clenching your thighs. His hands fisted the pillows next to him and you could feel the restraint he was exacting on himself through the trembling of his muscles.

“I’m not,” you promised. “I’m just making sure you’re ready.”

“I am. Swear to God.”

Unable to keep the smile off your face, you nodded and reached for the waistband of his shorts. He lifted his hips and helped you shove the material to his ankles. That was when you realized two things.

One, he was right. His cock laid thick and proud on his stomach and was weeping for you. He was of average length but his girth let you know that were going to struggle to fit him in your mouth. The thought only made you shiver in delight. A phantom pain panged in your gut when you took in the slight curve of the head, knowing it was going to hit everything you needed.

Second, he had the prettiest cock you had ever seen. You never thought dicks were pretty. In fact, you were pretty resolute on that thought. Most likely due to the disgusting amount of unsolicited dick pics you had received in your life. But, Namjoon’s?  You wanted to take a picture, frame it and admire it whenever you wanted to. The skin that stretched around his width was a shade darker than the rest of him and his cock head, a pretty red color, made you want to see how far down you could get the flush to go.

You wrapped your hand around his length and twisted up. Namjoon’s back arched off the couch and a string of curses fell off of his lips. Your thumb collected the glistening pre-cum on his tip and used it to smooth your palm over him.

“I normally don’t say this,” you said as you became infatuated with the vein that ran along the underside of his cock, “but if you want to send me a dick pic, I definitely won’t complain. Like, ever.”

“B-baby, I’ll give you whatever you want. Just keep doing what you’re doing.” Namjoon moaned, throwing his head back when your thumb pressed against the delicate skin that resided under the his mushroom tip.

You giggled lightly. “So sensitive. I’ve barely even started.”

Namjoon opened his mouth to say something but you didn’t give him a chance. You licked the vein that had caught your eye earlier and followed it to the top before enveloping the head of him into the heat of your mouth. You relished the broken groan that he let out. Several kitten licks were placed on his weeping slit before taking him deeper. You worked slowly, gauging his reaction as you took him further. He responded well, panting and moaning in encouragement, head still thrown back against the couch.

“You can look at me, you know,” you reminded him as he popped out of your mouth. Kisses were mouthed over the soft skin that was wrapped around the steel of his erection. Your hand used your spit as lube to tug him harder.

“Can’t,” Namjoon gasped. “Gonna blow my load if I watch you.”

“That’s kind of the whole point.”

“Not yet,” he whined. “I don’t want this to be over.”

You pinched his hip until he met your gaze, offering him a sweet smile. “This isn’t going to be the last time I get on my knees for you, baby.” You held his wide-eyed stare as you took him back into your mouth. Ignoring how his hands seemed to flutter around you, unsure of what to touch, you focused on sliding him further into your mouth. Then, you sucked hard, using your tongue to lave at the warm skin.

Namjoon lost it above you. He released a strangled moan that caused your core to absolutely gush. One hand finally tangled into your hair and the other gripped your shoulder with warning, which you ignored. You merely sucked and pulled harder. Namjoon’s hips flexed, causing the tip of him to slam into the back of your throat. Not expecting it, you couldn’t help but cough around him as your eyes watered.

“Oh, God! I’m so sorry.” Namjoon used the hand on your shoulder to yank you off. His thumbs wiped at the tears that trickled down your cheeks, the concern etched across his face made you feel warm inside. “Shit, are you okay?”

“I am, promise,” you assured him. “Just give me a second, okay?”

He nodded while pushing back some of your hair that had escaped your sloppy up-do. You gently removed his hands before looking down at his length that was still clutched in yours. As much as he had shocked you, the thought of him fucking your face was not something you shied away from. Really, it was exactly what you wanted. But you needed to prep a bit first.

When you took him back in your mouth, you focused on relaxing the muscles in your throat. Breathing deeply through your nose, you slowly worked yourself further down until your nose was pressed into the base of him. Spit trickled out of your mouth and over his balls as you pulled back. You did this a few more times, working past your gag reflex and allowing your throat to get used to the intrusion.

Namjoon was anything but quiet as you deep throated him. It was honestly the sexiest thing you had ever heard. While your past lovers hadn’t necessarily been quiet, the praises Namjoon kept raining on you and the beautiful noises he made were music to your ears. Your body certainly agreed. Your cunt ached to be filled and the fabric of your panties was soaked through. But, you ignored your needs and focused on the panting man before you.

“Okay,” you nodded as you popped him out of your mouth. “I’m ready.”

It took Namjoon’s brain a few seconds to process what you said. He shifted restlessly on the couch cushions as you ran your hands over his thighs. “Huh? W-what did you say?”

“I’m ready for you to fuck my face.”

His pupils were blown wide as he stared at you with an open mouth. “Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“What if I want it to hurt?” You stared at him while purring the words that was his undoing. Namjoon’s eyes got impossibly darker as his chest expanded with a sharp intake of breath. He spread his legs wider and gently held the back of your head as he guided you down his shaft. You held eye contact with him as he cautiously raised his hips to meet your lips. Once he saw no signs of distress from you, he began thrusting more consistently as you bobbed your head to match his rhythm.

His steady movements didn’t last long but it didn’t bother you. You were more than happy to take over for him. Like you said, this wasn’t going to be the last time you worshipped his cock. The two of you had plenty of time to figure things out. Plus, knowing how much you clearly affected him gave you all the motivation you needed.

Your throat began to tense up again so you focused your attentions on his sensitive head and let your hands twist up to your mouth and back down. The sounds of your palm gliding along his slick skin and your lips sucking tightly filled the spacious living room. They were nearly drowned out by Namjoon, though.

“Baby, oh f-fuck…shit,” he keened loud and hard when your other hand moved to brush over his swollen balls. You cupped them gently and rolled them between your fingers. Even as he was practically thrashing against you, hips thrusting in an aimless rhythm, the hand he had originally placed on the back of your head remained there. He applied no pressure, allowing you to set the pace, but it also seemed to ground him. To remind him that this wasn’t a dream.

“M’gonna cum. Baby…baby, I’m gonna cum. Soon, oh God,” he babbled. You appreciated the warning but you didn’t need it. He was twitching wildly in your mouth and your tongue was coated with the salty essence of his pre-cum. In response, you ran your index finger on that sensitive spot behind his balls and that’s when Namjoon exploded.

Thick ropes of white shot down your throat, causing you to almost gag. Instead, you swallowed past the reflex and took as much as you could. By the fourth stream, a bit had managed to slip past the suction of your mouth and dribble down his cock. You were quick to clean up, licking at the mess the both of you had made before returning to his tip. You suckled the sensitive head until Namjoon practically shoved you away from him.

When you looked up you were met with a glorious sight. Namjoon was completely fucked out, twitching against the couch and his broad chest heaving for air. Sweat beaded his sharp jaw line and trickled down the column of his throat. His face was tilted towards the ceiling and his hair was haphazardly pushed off of his forehead. He looked completely ruined and entirely yours.

“Was that good?” You asked softly as you rose to your feet, ignoring the sharp ache in your knees. Namjoon made an unintelligible sound in the back of his throat that you took as a resounding yes. He cracked his eyes open and looked at you with such adoration you couldn’t help but blush.

“Really?” He murmured. “Don’t get shy on me now. You can’t just suck the life out of me one second and then start blushing like a school girl immediately after.”

“It’s called duality,” you muttered as your cheeks flushed darker. Namjoon snorted and reached for you, pulling you onto his lap. His spent cock nestled between your thighs and his eyes rolled back into his head when he felt the simmering heat through the fabric of your shorts.

“I need five minutes. Then, I swear to God, I’m going to eat you out like you deserve.”

Giggling, you wrapped your arms around his neck, playing with the strands of hair at the base of his neck. “You don’t have to. This wasn’t a quid pro quo situation. I gave you a blowjob because I wanted to. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“It’s either you give me five minutes so that I can eat you out or ten minutes so I can fuck you into next week. You decide.”

His determination brought a smile to your face until you took in the purple bags under his eyes and how his eyelids kept drooping lower and lower. “How about a nap first, hm? I’ll decide after you get some sleep.”

Namjoon looked like he wanted to protest but you kissed him instead. His argument clearly wasn’t that strong because when you pulled away he was nodding in resignation. You helped him pull up his shorts and squealed when he lifted you up into his arms. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you let him carry you into the bedroom and wrap the both of you up in the comforter. You hadn’t planned on sleeping with him, wanting to get more work done while he slept. But the faint scent of his aftershave and the soft way he caressed your spine could lull an insomniac to sleep. Who were you to refuse?

“Wake me up when you decide,” Namjoon whispered into your hair. You nodded against his chest, and within minutes the two of you slipped into a deep slumber. Happy and content.

©jcwritings Do not repost, translate, or use my stories without my permission.

LINKS:

masterlist

ao3

[hellveticabold]

Hidden Horror in Loki

I am haunted by a few portions of the Loki series. Like I find myself thinking about these fictitious story beats and make myself cry in the shower. Thought I’d share it here, but I warn you: it’s sad. 

Every person that Sylvie met after her escape from the TVA was doomed to die

Think about that for a second. It wasn’t JUST that Sylvie was on the run from a very young age (though that’s terrible enough on it’s own), she literally had to hide in apocalypses for hundreds to thousands of years. She knew that every kindly grandmother who gave her food would be killed in a few minutes or days. Each cute boy or girl she had a crush on would die very soon - and probably quite painfully. 

Every laughing baby, every smiling couple, every sleepy kitten, every person she was ever intimate with... For 1000 years, every face she saw was doomed to death. And if she had to go to the same apocalypses over and over again, she got to see the same people die many times over. 

Even If she ever had wanted to save someone - to help the people of Pompeii escape the volcano or rescue the RoxxCart shoppers or just save someone she felt a connection with - she couldn’t. If she rescued anyone from the ‘sacred timeline’, the TVA would find her and kill everyone she’d saved.

No wonder she’s got difficulties connecting with others!

All of those cars, buses, and buildings in the Void were full of people when they were pruned

Instead of looking for Easter eggs in the void, I was busy picturing the last horrifying moments of the thousands of men, women, and children who must have been consumed alive by Alioth. Even Classic Loki says that “whole realities’ had been sent to the Void and eaten. 

Sylvie found herself in a school bus when she was pruned - who’s to say that bus wasn’t full of children when it was sent to the void? 

When we see the USS Eldrige try to fight Alioth, at least they were soldiers. At least they were used to seeing the horrors of war. What about the literal millions of helpless, innocent people that were sent there to die? 

President Loki is fighting to rule over a miserable, hopeless wasteland where the universe goes to die

I know it’s played for laughs, but President Loki (along with all of the other Loki variants in the void) just makes me so sad.

It wasn’t until I saw the Funko pop for President Loki that I really noticed how worn and damaged his suit is. Yes, it’s Tom Hiddleston so he looks sexy as hell no matter what. But the thing that really got me is his torn pant leg. How did that happen? How long has he been here?

And that damn torn pant leg made me realize how absolutely horrific his life must be. How many people has he seen die? Thousands? Millions? He can trust no one, he fights to the death for scraps. What kind of immeasurable suffering is behind that smile? His is a loveless, empty, paranoid, miserable existence. Just like almost every other Loki in the Void. 

Our Loki felt inadequate and unloved and so tried to take over Earth. But what about President Loki? Does he distract himself from his soul-crushing emptiness by keeping the suit as pristine as possible? Is that the only sense of self and security he has? But what happens when the suit tears? 

They’re like rabid animals - scratching and clawing and killing each other to climb aboard a sinking ship. They’re all going to die - but the one at the top will die last - and that’s all they’re really fighting for.

The nightmare that is Throg’s cameo

Speaking of miserable existences - How am I supposed to sleep at night knowing that there is a sentient creature buried alive in the Void? I mean, Jimminy Christmas, that’s horrifying. 

Who could be mad at Sylvie for trying to destroy the organization that caused all of this misery?

In summation - Sylvie’s life was a nightmare, the TVA is unimaginably evil, and President Loki makes me a strange combination of sad and aroused. 

Sorry for the sad feels everyone; I just had to get it off my chest. 

[vvienne]

RANWAN FIC RECS

Absolute Zero by jitterati

Pathologically solitary academic Chu Wanning left behind a life of research to enlist with the Pan-Pacific Defense Corps Jaeger team when giant monsters began to emerge from the Pacific ocean, eager to leave his personal entanglements behind him and join humanity's collective battle against the threat of extinction.

His goal is to build an artificial intelligence that will allow a pilot to operate a Jaeger mech solo - eliminating the need for pilot compatibility and the mortifying ordeal of being totally known by another person, a "neurological handshake" known colloquially as the drift.

He didn't expect his former students to follow him all the way to front line of the war against the kaiju.

Featuring lots of side character interaction, pining, yearning, questions on the nature of personhood, friendship between jerks, people coping badly with loss, snarky AI, and giant robots. Illustrations by Saika & Daru

Husky and his White Kitten Disciple by JustAMoon123

Within a lonely heart, the seeds of hatred start to grow.

-A 2ha Age and Role-Reversal AU.-

NOTE: This Story is Now E Rated!

[Before meeting Chu Wanning, Mo Ran had drawn his power exclusively from the Wood side of his dual Spiritual Root, and his Qi had always glowed green.

Now, only when in battle did it do so, with Bugui’s blade encased in a tyrannical green light.

Outside of battle, like when he set barriers of warmth; or made Crystal Butterflies to tease golden flowers; or cast a small array to keep a box of food warm, his Qi manifested with a gentle red glow.

Mo Ran’s Wood was destructive, while his Fire was protective.

Ah, Mo Weiyu, Mo Weiyu. Even your power betrays you.]

Burn, Pine, and Perish by moonqueenmaia

It’s been two days since Taxian-Jun’s last visit, and Mo Ran hasn’t touched Chu Wanning at all, beyond gentle and fleeting caresses. Chu Wanning decides to take matters into his own hands by surprising Mo Ran when he comes back to their home after a trip down the mountain.

it's no coincidence (it's a kitty-incidence) by lanzhan (gothguk)

There’s a white cat lounging in the middle of Mo Ran's bed.

to touch you with bare hands (even if it burns) by moonqueenmaia

Chu Wanning is a renowned professor of mechanical engineering at Sisheng Peak University. Beautiful, lonely, and talented beyond belief, he has spent his 32 years mostly by himself, silently and secretly yearning for affection and companionship. Yet Chu Wanning has resolved to himself that he will spend the rest of his life alone, no matter his hidden fantasies.

Enter Taxian-jun, an unruly, arrogant, and struggling student, fiery and domineering, who comes in and shatters the calm of Chu Wanning's life. They enter into an agreement, both burying their feelings underneath a storm of lust and lies. Yet amidst it all, something deeper may be helplessly and slowly blooming.

It is up to them to cultivate it, or destroy it for good.

cursed by devilsoupe

Chu Wanning and his disciples are sent to investigate an abandoned village, and Chu Wanning is hit with a curse.

Mo Ran was determined to treat his shizun respectfully in this life, but what choice does he have?

liar liar cock on fire by lofikv

I (32M) walked in on my roommate (23M) masturbating in our living room. Ever since then I couldn't erase the image of his penis in my mind but I found a sex toy online that is almost as big as him, so I bought it and tried it on myself so that I can imagine how he would feel inside me. I have also been romantically attracted to him ever since we started living together. How can I cope with this?

UPDATE: He caught me in the middle of an emergency.

(Absolute) Unit 311 by devilsoupe

Chu Wanning doesn't have a soulmark.

Neither does Mo Ran.

ducks entering highway by Sectionladvivi

Mo Ran finds out his well-respected, MILF-coded, tears-of-angels-tight-ass robotics professor moonlights as an erotic novelist. He immediately leverages this knowledge for an opportunity to play tonsil hockey.

to yearn by devilsoupe

Chu Wanning starts to cough up flowers. Taxian-Jun is angry. Chu Wanning is not allowed to die pining for someone else.

When it starts happening again in his second life, Mo Ran knows enough to worry.

from blossom to blossom to impossible blossom by Wildehack (tyleet)

Taxian Jun is the victim of a flower curse.

sticky fingers by fakeplasticlily

The man tosses the towel unceremoniously back at Mo Ran’s chest, like he’s personally offended by it. And the fact that his hands had just been all over said chest barely minutes earlier, maybe. “Please pack a box of egg tarts with extra custard filling, a box of red bean paste buns with extra syrup, a rice pudding with extra candied fruit garnish, and a box of osmanthus cakes with extra sweet pear jam.” Mo Ran’s eyes grow progressively wider as he lists the items. It’s him. Not the suburban mother of four, not the elderly guy dealing with a midlife crisis, but quite possibly the hottest guy he’s ever seen. Who also happens to have the highest sugar tolerance Mo Ran has seen in a human being in his two years of running this bakery. 

Hard to Love The Lonely Night by bloodsongs

Chu Wanning glares up at him, adjusting his women’s robes. “Still, why couldn’t you have been the wife instead?”

Coughing politely, Mo Ran looks to the side, avoiding his gaze. “Shizun’s skills with the illusion barrier far surpass this humble disciple’s, and, well…”

He doesn’t need to complete his sentence—it’s infuriating, but Mo Ran is now taller than him, broader than him, larger than him. Very much so. The young sapling he raised in Sisheng Peak is now a full-fledged tree, a man built like the mountains Chu Wanning has seen in his travels.

Chu Wanning and Mo Ran pretend to be a married couple visiting a small mountain town to investigate some suspicious disappearances. Mini Canon AU casefic. Contains spoilers up to Chapter 130 or so of the novel.

Purple Ink by jeejaschocolate

Chu Wanning is a robotics engineer who lives a life of isolation and loneliness, only partially due to his chronic illness. Eventually he gets so sick that he requires the help of a full-time medical assistant.

Of course, these days, all those jobs are given to CyberLife androids.

Chu Wanning resents the android they give him. From his fiery eyes to his long black hair, to his incomparable tenderness and consideration for Wanning’s feelings.

He resents him. All the way until he falls in love with him.

Fallen Flowers in Swallows' Nests by bloodsongs

You deserve better—I refuse to disrespect you ever again. I want to be better. I must be better.

But I don’t know how. I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know where Taxian-Jun ends and Mo-Zongshi begins.

I only know now that I cannot lie to myself: I want you so fiercely that I burn with it, I am consumed with the desire to make you mine and mine alone. To become one with you, feeling your fire twine with mine.

Or, Chu Wanning finds letters from Mo-Zongshi that were never shared with him.

These hitherto undiscovered letters cover a range of emotions that weren't present in the book he gifted his Shizun: contrition, yearning, and desire.

Counterpoint by senchafloat

Five years ago, Mo Ran was just a boy who loved playing piano—there were many things he didn't know. He didn't know how capricious and unforgiving the world of classical music could be. He didn't know just how lucky he was to have Chu Wanning as his teacher.

Five years later, Chu Wanning is now a renowned concert pianist, and Mo Ran is an upstart conducting student. When Chu Wanning shows up unannounced at his alma mater, Mo Ran has plenty of questions, along with a desire to prove his worth to his old teacher. But as it turns out, Chu Wanning isn't as invincible as he once seemed. As old secrets come up to the surface, the two of them are forced to reinvent the ways they'll make music together.

impatient to adore you by riverdanceeee

At some heartbreaking point in his life, Mo Ran accepted that Chu Wanning would never reciprocate his feelings, so he dealt with it as any other person would. He'd rid himself of his affection, respect their friendship, and learn to move on. But Mo Ran's affection runs too deep, and when any opportunity to spend time with Chu Wanning knocks on his door, he goes running to answer and accept. Even if it means he has to break up a potentially dangerous dog fighting ring.

To Bow Before A Willow Vine by bloodsongs

“I…” Mo Ran hadn’t thought that far. He shakes his head, lowering his head in deference, resting his forehead against Chu Wanning’s knuckles. "I'll do anything you want of me."

The silence stretches on for a beat too long.

"Anything?" Chu Wanning says eventually, tilting his head.

Written for 2Ha Week, Day 4: Reverse AU for the 0.5 timeline. When Chu Wanning storms Sisheng Peak and crowns himself the cultivation world's new emperor, Mo Ran trades his life for Xue Meng's. Contains spoilers for up to the end of the novel.

Call me by my name by rinsled05

When the man called Taxian-Jun arrives, years later, it’s the coming of a storm.

He sweeps into a dinner appointment between Chu Wanning and a client, clad in black, a smirk tugging at his mouth. Over the spark of irritation, Chu Wanning can’t help but admire his lean frame, the way his hair, cut rebelliously short, falls over smoldering, dark eyes. The way he towers over him, even when Chu Wanning rises to full height.

Chu Wanning’s heart races as Taxian-Jun leans in close, ignoring the shouts and gasps around them.

“Sakaki of Ran,” he purrs in their native tongue. “You’re mine.”

Chu Wanning lifts his chin. “I don’t know you.”

“You will,” Taxian-Jun says, and leaves.

In which Chu Wanning is a courtesan serving Chinese merchants in Nagasaki, Japan, and Taxian-Jun decides to make him his.

荷官牌型 ♠️ The Croupier's Hand by bloodsongs

In deep financial straits after losing his job as a teacher, a desperate Chu Wanning becomes a croupier at Sisheng's new casino.

The once sleepy town of Sisheng Peak grows busier by the day as the casino draws more and more tourists to their mountains. Consumed by his lingering regrets over the worst mistake of his life that destroyed his teaching career, Chu Wanning is too distracted to worry about anything else but his next shift, his next paycheck.

Except that's when Mo Ran, the reason Chu Wanning lost everything, returns to Sisheng Peak.

As the heir to the casino.

White Rabbit Club by minkit

Desperate to rid himself of a few pesky things called virginity and desire, Chu Wanning waltzes into a world he knows little about and right into the embrace of a mysterious stranger who reminds him of the student he's been dreaming about all year. The lust fueled dreams his student stars in are the very reason Chu Wanning applied to the sex club in the first place, and now he's desperate to get rid of these filthy impulses once and for all.

Congratulations, Chu Wanning, on your acceptance into the White Rabbit Club. We hope you enjoy your stay.

Risk and Restraint by purloinedinpetrograd

There is nobody Mo Ran works with who does not love him. He’s worked hard to cultivate this image while he climbs the corporate ladder at Sisheng, and it’s paid off in dividends. He’s in every WeChat group. He can call in favors with any division of any department. He can make even the tightest of deadlines relax their stranglehold on his team.

That is, there is nobody except, of course, Chu Wanning.

A Lingering Sweetness by theherocomplex

Chu Wanning is now all too aware of what he looks like: a dry stick of a man, never handsome, angular and cold and pale. A drab, short-tempered creature, as appealing as a splinter in one's foot. But Mo Ran looks at him as if he will never get his fill, and part of Chu Wanning thinks, What if —?

At the end of the line by PearlAquaBlue 

“So … I reckon someone thought you needed to loosen up a little bit. Now that you’re here, want to try it?”

Chu Wanning hangs up. Throws her phone on her pillow with a disgusted glare after it. Stands up and paces to the kitchen in long, angry strides. Her cheeks are burning. With trembling fingers, she grabs a glass and pours herself some water, gulping it down in one go. It doesn’t help much. She grips the kitchen counter tightly, then marches back into the bedroom to glare at the phone again. Her fingertips itch, and it’s as if some kind of magnetic force draws her closer and closer to her bed until her fingertips are but an inch away from that tempting black mirror. Before she knows it, she’s unlocked it unsteadily and pressed “repeat” on the last call.

“Welcome to Sisheng Peak – ”

“And what would that entail?” she asks, a little too breathless.

Let's Fall in Love for the Night by purloinedinpetrograd

Chu Wanning could only stare in horror as a large cloud of sickeningly yellow pollen rose from the field, blanketing the place where Mo Ran stood in a heavy fog. “Um,” he said lamely.

“Fuck,” Mo Ran cursed, and Chu Wanning didn’t even have the heart to chastise him for his coarse language, because he was too preoccupied wrestling the surge of fear at seeing his disciple disappear behind the haze of that indeterminately threatening dust.

A million terrible possibilities raced through his mind, each one more dramatic and gruesome than the last. His heart hammered against his ribcage, threatening to crack the bones. “Mo Ran,” he said slowly, “I think you should tell me what that does, now.”

Xue Zhengyong sends Chu Wanning and Mo Ran on a mission to find a specific ingredient for some concoction of his wife’s. Chu Wanning is torn between rejoicing at the chance to spend time alone with Mo Ran... and grieving over the very same thing.

But, well, it’s just flowers. What could go wrong, right? (Spoiler alert: it’s sex pollen.)

the day dawns in your hues by localshabba

2ha Week 2020 Day 1 prompt - Haitang

---

Schoolteacher Mo Ran is having an ordinary day until he has an awkward encounter with the notoriously rigid school librarian, which leads to the start of something new.

Also features: flowers, dinosaurs and lots of tenderness and pining.

helping hands by verity

When Mo Ran was but a young, innocent, virtuous grad student—well, one of those things—she built that couch from a flatpack box with her own two hands. Over the years, the smell of polyester and cheap foam padding has given way to an equally aromatic blend of Chu Wanning's haitang blossom perfume, spilled coffee, and white lithium grease. Chu Wanning herself is always perfectly dressed without a stain in sight. Even right now, her head tucked onto one folded arm, the other loosely gripping her tablet, she looks so formal.

Mo Ran gently rests a hand on Chu Wanning's socked ankle where it peeks out of those tailored white trousers. She really should behave herself.

She really should... behave herself...

in plain sight by localshabba

Written for a prompt fill in the 2ha Kink Meme.

---

"I have a surprise," Mo Ran breathed, coming to stand so close behind him that his breath landed on Chu Wanning's nape. Not touching Chu Wanning any other way, because he likes to make Chu Wanning lean back just a little bit, to seek out that contact himself.

"I think Chu-laoshi will enjoy it."

Chu Wanning is sure he agreed to the whole idea; he's just unclear on when. Things got hazy around the point when Mo Ran turned him around by the shoulders, got down on his knees and...well. Apparently he'd skipped breakfast that morning.

When he returned to his senses, his clothes were all neatly tucked into place, not a stain on them, and a charmingly pink sexual aid was nestled comfortably up his--ahem, inside him.

---

Now available in Spanish!

casually acquainted by tagteamme

Chu Wanning knows what he is and what he isn’t. And where he lacks in pleasantries and outward appeal, he makes up for in untouchable grace and dignity.

It threatens to unravel once he meets a familiar face in an unfamiliar city.

“So quick to run away from me, Chu-laoshi,” Mo Ran says, voice gently teasing as Chu Wanning refuses to make eye contact with him. “After you came all the way from…”

He trails off, waiting for Chu Wanning to let him know, but he sees the map open on Chu Wanning’s phone and grins wider. “You want directions?”

Chu Wanning clears his throat, and shakes his head. He should say something— instead, he stays silent as he looks down at his phone and punches in the hotel name again.

Happily, his phone tells him to try again when he has signal.

The Right Hand of Light by gedsparrowhawk (FaceChanger)

Chu Wanning is asleep on the bed, clutching his hands tightly to his chest and curled in on himself. He’s still wearing the same robes he was in in the water prison. On the writing desk, a bowl of water and clean linen for bandages sit untouched, and a tub of bathwater has cooled without being used. Mo Ran sighs to himself. Wanning is truly hopeless.

He sits on the side of the bed and touches Chu Wanning’s shoulder. “Wanning,” he says. “Wanning, wake up.”

---

Rare 0.5 tenderness, after the water prison.

nothing can consume you by tagteamme

Mo Ran’s violent history has never had to catch up to him.

It’s already embedded itself into him as scars on his body, as a tattoo on his forearm, as the lingering taste of blood in his sleep and finally, as the searing brand pressed against his chest before he’s thrown into the sea as punishment. He knows that this is where all his chances come to an end.

But as the deep fathom of the water swallows him up, something else saves him and pulls him to a tiny cove tucked away off the coast of an overlooked port town. When he wakes up under the care of a mythical creature wearing a familiar face, an even older and more distant past finally finds him.

[violetnotez]

HC: The Boys Taste Their S/o’s Chapstick

Anonymous:  could I request headcannons for shinso, mirio, denki, sero, and bakugo kissing their s/o and tasting their chapstick ? Or if you want or when they realize their s/o takes care of them in really subtle ways that they didn’t really notice it at first ? i love your blog so much 🥺❤️

Hey babe omg Im so happy you like my blog!!!! Also this ask OMG I have been wanting to write it for so long!!!! Im a sucker for these super cute and fluffy headcanons, so thank you so much for the idea!

Pairings: Shinso x reader, Mirio x reader, Denki x reader, Sero x reader, Bakugo x reader

Warnings: some might get suggestive, but none of these are full blown NSFW! Just a sprinkle of spiciness, thats all!

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ

S H I N SO U

Flavor: Cherry Vanilla

Your currently trying to get ready for bed with Shinsou, his purple hair cascading against the pillow as he’s scrolling through Insta

defintely looking at cat vids

Youre just BEAT from the day- work, school, practice, whatever your life entails it just felt so incredibly tiring today

Of course, Shinsou seems to have other plans

Once he sees you come out of the bathroom, your hair wet, your skin dewy from washing, your body only wearing one of his oversized shirts and some small shorts....

man is gonna wanna be allllll over you

“Damn, kitten who allowed you to look that hot,” he’d purr, his eyes drinking you in as he propped his body on his elbows to get a better look

You’d roll your eyes, a smile on your lips-

Lowkey a perv for his s/o fight me on this

Once you sit down on the bed, its over

Shinso’s hands are all over you, his palms trailing under your shirt as he leaved lazy kisses on your neck

“Cmon, baby, lets have a little fun before we sleep....”

Just tell him your tired, and he’ll comply, turning super fluffy and cuddly in a matter of minutes

Reluctantly tho this boi is horny when hes horny

“Ahh my kitten’s tired? Fine then, you need your rest.”

He’ll lean in to give a sweet kiss, unknowingly of how flavorful you taste now with your chapstick

And OHOHOHO after that its OVER

The taste of vanilla bursts in his mouth, the scent of cherry becoming more prominent-

When did you start tasting so good?

He honestly wont know how to react- he’ll shake his head and blink a few times, “The hell-?” spilling out of his lips

He grabs you buy the chin, his thumb swiping against your lips gently

Once he sees the faint red sheen on his digit, it kinda dawns on him whats going on

You catch on to his confusion, a small giggle spilling out of you as you tell him its just chapstick you bought since your lips felt dry

He’ll just give you a lazy smirk, his lilac eyes a royal purple as he eyes you

This man cant HELP HIMSELF

He’ll lean in for another kiss, this one lasting much longer and more passionate as he tried to capture that taste again

“Do me a favor and keep wearing that kitten,”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

M I R I O 

Flavor: Birthday Cake

Im so proud of fidning this picture im sorry it just matches so well

Anywaysssssssss

You had just gotten out of the locker room, your UA uniform a little wrinkled from being balled up while you were training

You walked out the metal doors, your lips feeling much softer than usual- you were in desperate need of chapstick after that particular lesson

Thanks UA for having training grounds that blow up every 5 seconds and spray dust everywhere

But thankfully Neijire is the best person ever and hooked you up with some super cute chapstick

Since it was new and just sitting in her book bag, she just told you to keep it

NEIJIRE WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO SWEET?

You had to admit though, you really liked it- the packaging was pretty cute, it was nice on your skin, but the SMELL

OMG

You felt like a bakery was near you every step you took

And everytime you licked your lips it tasted like sweets, which was an amazing addition

Makes ya wonder how safe it is to consume makeup 👀

Mirio is the cutest boyfirend though-wherever your class is, he waits for you outside and walks with you until you have to go your seperate ways

So, as usual, he’s waiting for you outside the locker room, a wide grin plastered on his face

Once he sees you walk out of the doors, he’s already bounding over, his arms swinging cause hes always just so happy to see you 

“Hey sunshine!” he greets you like any other day, his voice just radiating happiness

Some days though, Mirio will kiss the top of your head as he grabs your hand and walks you to his class

Other days, he’s a little more bold, instead leaning down to give you a kiss on your lips as he snakes his hand around your waist

TODAY BABE 

IS THAT DAY

You can tell he’s feeling a little more *frisky cause he’s got this mischievous glint in his eyes

ehhhh why not indulge him?

So you get on your tippie toes, leaning in to him and planting a quick kiss on his lips

But thats when Mirio gets confused- did you eat something?Is it cake? CInnamon roll? Cookie? But whatever it is, it tastes GOOD

“Sweetie, did you buy something from the vending machine?” he asks, a confused grin on his face as he eyes you

You laugh, not realizing that Mirio would be affected by your new chapstick too, 

“Oh no, its just a chapstick Niejire gave me, I think its cake batter flavored- do you like it?”

Mirio licked his lips , savoring the lingering flavor on his skin

“You batter belive it!”

*cue the groaning

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

D E N K I

Flavor: Pina Colada

So Mina, bless her little music crazed heart, somehow won a pack of tickets from a radio station to a new water park opening up not too far from UA

It was superrrrr expensive to get in, but the music station hooked all you guys up with VIP tickers, a private cabana, food, THE WORKS

You had been running around with the group all day

(except Bakugo- he either went to the lazy river or the surfing simulator thignie cause Kaminari said he would wipe out and wanted to prove him wrong)

Everybody else wanted to do everythingggg, from ride the craziest rides to trying all the food the park had

By the end of the day, you were completely beat and just wanted to rest

Mina was sitting beside you in  the cabana (again, thank you radio station for hooking some teens up!), just searching it for snacks the boys hadnt eaten

“Aww cmon, really?! We have chapstick but no food?!”

Your head instantly perked up at the sound- chapstick? God, you could deifnitely use some right now from all that chlorine and sun...

You asked Mina to toss you one, the pink skinned girl throwing you a tube as she grumbled about how “piggy” boys were

You checked the flavor on the tube, the fruits on the side label instantly telling you it was something tropical

As you were putting it on, the boys of Bakusquad were bounding up the steps, their feets covered in sand-

“Guess what?! We got Bakugo to go in the wave pool! Isnt that crazy! It had sand on the bottom, like a real beach-”

Kirishima was just gushing and super excited, Bakugo looking like a pissed off wet cat next to him

You sat up quickly, happy to see your boyfriend, his spiky hair all wet from the day and his boxers dripping

As Kirishima and Sero were messing with an extremely annoyed Bakugo, you went and grabbed the boys some towels, giving the last one to your boyfriend

“Aww thanks babe,” he gushed out, his hands grabbing the towel gingerly as he leaned to kiss you

But wait- you tasted- really sweet?

Kaminari pulled back slightly, a small smirk on his lips, cause damn, that tasted really good

“Did you eat some fruit or something? Cause you taste super yummy babe-”

You  pointed to your lips as you told him how Mina found some free chapstick lying around in the cabana

Kaminari just gave you this really blissed out stare as he sneaked one more peck from you- he was kinda wishing his friends weren't here, cause hed totally be making out with you with that yummy stuff on your lips...

“Do me a favor and dont take that stuff off, okay? Until we get back to the dorms,”

He sent you a small wink, weaving behind you inconspicously, and giving your bottom a playful pinch

WHY YOU GOTTA BE A FLIRT KAMINARI

(Also before you left Kamianri most definitely dumped the whole jar of chapsticks into his backpack)

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ 

S E R O

Flavor: Peppermint

You and Sero had just gotten coffee from a little cafe when it starts to rain

Like alottttttttttt

And of course it happens when your right outside, waiting for your ride to take you back home

So you two are just standing there like weirdos with the rain POURING, Sero holding up his jacket over both of your heads

But honestly, it’s not doing much to block out the rain, so honestly-why not have some fun?

You run out of the fabric, instantly feeling your whole body get drenched as you start twirling and laughing

“He-hey wait, babe!”

Sero’s gonna be laughing, and now y’all playing a wierd game of tag

Aghhhhhh so cute tho 🥺🥺

He catches you pretty quickly, his tape grabbing your waist and pulling you to him,,,

You instantly collide with his chest, your cheeks rosy from running around so much and your hands resting on his chest

Sero gives you the biggest grin, his finger under your chin and raising it to look at him

“You know your the biggest tease I know?”

“Yup!”

He laughs, placing a kiss on your lips-and omg why are you minty? and it feels soooo good to him, cause honestly mint isn’t a bad flavor-

“Hey babe whatcha got on your lips? Did you eat-gum or something?”

You just laugh and tell him it’s some chapstick you got (imagine the mint eos U KNOW THE ONE)

He asks if it’s the egg chapstick OML 💀

Yes Sero the egg chapstick

His lips are parted a little, his eyes wider than usual cause he’s lowkey confused on how he liked that so much

But he send you another huge grin before he kisses you again-

“I think your gonna need to wear that more for me, yeah?”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

B A K U G O

Flavor: Cinnamon

Bakugo has ben practically forcing you to wake up at ungodly hours with him to train

He says its cause “youre getting weak” but really he’s a total simp for having such close contact with you

Also he’s a little brat and put his all into it  so you cant ever beat him, which boosts his ego for some reason?

“Hah, that really the best you got?” he scoffs down at you, his calloused hands pinning you to the ground as his body cages you in for the umpteenth time

Honestly, its hard to fight when your 1) annoyed about loosing and 2) have your hot as hell boyfriend pining you to the ground

But thankfully

THANKFULLY

He was starting to overheat, his breathe coming out in low pants as  strands  of hair began sticking to his forehead

You felt one of his palms begin to slip ever so slightly near you, and on instinct you knew you had to do something, you finally had an opening-

so you caused a distraction 

Your hands quickly flew to the nape of his neck, pressing his head down to your so you could kiss him square on the lips

Bakugo was completely confused in the best way possible- he didnt expect that to happen, but hell, hes not complaining-

until his lips start to tingle

“-the hell?!” he sputters out, his mind trying to figure out what was going on just before you successfuly flip him over, with you now on top

You stared down triumphantly at your boyfriend, not knowing how well that worked- until you noticed how shiny Bakugo lips look

He begins mashing his lips together, trying to rub it off since you had his hands pinned down

“The hell is on my lips? Agh, dont tell me its that weird ass lip stuff that supposed to make your lips bigger or something-’’

Ummmmm how does he know about lip plumping lip gloss? Question for a another day-

“Its chapstick silly,” you giggle, “-cinnamon”

Honestly, he’s gonna like it-this boy likes spicy things and the fact that “spicy” sensation came from his s/o....shoooottttt he is in love

But

Of course

He’s gonna act like it’s wierd or something, cause HES wierd

“Cinnamon? You couldn’t get something normal like cherry or grape?”

You scrunch up your nose, cause yeah your not for those flavors AT ALL, and Bakugo finds his chance

He quickly flips you over, your back now against the floor and his body on top of yours

“Cmon, baka don’t tell me thats seriosuly all you got-“

Don’t remind him that you were able to flip him over tho he’ll turn red and tell you to shut it

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

[robininthelabyrinth]

"The Untamed", but Jiggy has a white cat whom he tells everything.- May or may not be sentient or 'spiritual' like Fairy in the book. (From an idea I've thrown around with my friend @yraelviii)

ao3

He found the cat in Qinghe.

“What are you doing here?” Meng Yao said, crouching down to try to scoop out the little handful of white fluff underneath his cabinet only for it to bare its infantile fangs and him and hiss, moving its butt around as if it thought his fingers ought to be running in fear from its fearsome pounce. “How did you even get in here?”

The cat – a kitten, really, small and scrawny, dirty and covered in ashes as if it had just run out of a forge, but no less passionate for it – squirmed in his hand as he picked it up.

“Who owns you?” Meng Yao asked, and the cat hissed viciously as if to shout no one owns me!

Something about that echoed in Meng Yao’s heart – no one owns me, he thought – and so he fished up some extra meat from his plate, filled a small platter with water, and used the sleeve of an old outfit that needed to be taken to be laundered anyway to wipe the grey ash off of the cat’s white fur while it was distracted by sniffing suspiciously at the food and water that it ultimately declined to consume.

“Just this once,” he told it.

-

Doing good work will often only bring you more work, Meng Yao reflected, and so it was with the cat as much as with anything else. He still didn’t know how the cat managed to get into his rooms, and he sometimes dwelled on paranoid suspicions that there were hiding-holes in his chambers designed to allow others to spy on him, just as there had been in certain rooms in the brothel – though even at his worst moment of uncertainty and doubt he didn’t really think so. He knew that it wasn’t Nie Mingjue’s style even if Meng Yao had been someone important enough to care about, and anyway he didn’t question his own ability to discovery such a thing if it had really existed. He’d checked.

At any rate, however it kept getting into his rooms, the cat was now a regular presence there, lurking around.

It didn’t want to be petted and greeted all attempts to feed it with utter disdain, but despite its general standoffishness it seemed to like being in the same vicinity as Meng Yao, enjoying nothing more than to settle haughtily by the window in his room and watch over Meng Yao as if it thought he might get lost without its supervision.

Meng Yao thought it was probably someone’s pet gotten lost, or maybe even just a feral cat from outside (Qinghe had a fair number of them) that had figured out that it could access the good life by going inside, but it was very hard to sincerely worry over the ill-intentions of a cat, and he was already very busy.

If he didn’t need to care for it, then it wasn’t adding to his troubles. Let the cat sit where it liked!

Meng Yao had found that life in Qinghe was both different and similar to life in Yunping, the only life he had to compare it to, and it amused him to think of the great and righteous Nie sect as an overly large brothel, with the main difference being that they sold their strength where women sold their bodies. In both places there needed to be order, someone to sort things out and tell people where to put things and what to do; in both places Meng Yao, with his quick mind and excellent memory, his sense of understanding people and anticipating their needs, was utterly invaluable in arranging such things.

He had, admittedly, expected it to take a little more time to climb up to the top – the only person he couldn’t understand in this place was Nie Mingjue, who was far too easy to deceive and smiled at him like he really thought they were friends instead of just being master and servant, who appreciated his talents and told him so, who shrugged off his mistakes and had faith that he would do better, who ignored his status instead of lording it over him the way Meng Yao had expected him to. Even when he was angry, when he shouted and slammed his hands against things, Nie Mingjue never once mentioned Meng Yao’s background, and the only things he seemed to hold against him were his own mistakes.

Meng Yao still didn’t know why Nie Mingjue would act so rashly as to promote someone he had just met to a position as high as viceroy, much less actually trust him, but it didn’t really matter. However quixotic his method of reaching a place of power, he was here and his next task was to keep his place until he’d made a reputation for himself.

Part of that he did through his work, good critical work that people needed and which had always won him gratitude even if not respect, but the other part of it was in cultivation. That was the way in which the Nie sect was not like a brothel: you couldn’t just be clever, you couldn’t even just be beautiful - to be respected, you had to cultivate.

Not that wanting to cultivate was a problem for Meng Yao.

He’d always had a memory like a sponge and a body that obeyed his every wish, his childhood of mimicking the beautiful dances of his mother and her ‘sisters’ serving him well in transitioning to learning the sword even if he was years behind everyone else; his mother had bought a thousand fake cultivation manuals for him and he’d learned them all, each one of them more useless than the next, and now that he was here in the cultivation world at long last, he was finally, finally, finally able to cultivate for real.

Using Nie sect methods, of course, even if that wasn’t what he really wanted.  

He’d started as soon as he could when he arrived, endlessly grateful that the Nie sect provided training sabers without cost, and he’d snuck one away back to his room so that he could practice on his own time, knowing it would take a long time to form his golden core. He’d debated with himself for a long time as to whether or not it was worth it to invest in a real one – if the training sabers were free, then real proper Nie sabers were somehow three times as expensive as the swords you could buy in the marketplace, and you could only put in a deposit without any notion of when you’d actually get the saber, apparently subject to the contrary dispositions of the spiritual weaponsmiths that made them.

In the end he decided to go for it more or less on a whim, emptying out his hard-built savings to place the order, even though he knew he would one day need to discard whatever they made for him in favor of a sword.

The Jin sect would accept him one day. He would make them.

(If the Nie sect cultivation style was good for one thing, he thought as he went through endless drills of slashing and thrusting, it was that you could work out your anger while you were doing it. There was nothing quite like imagining the face of someone you hated and then bringing down the practice saber in a vicious slash, and oh, but Meng Yao hated so very many people.)

The cat liked watching him train most of all, although Meng Yao suspected it was because seeing him jump around panting was funnier than watching him sit at his desk and gracefully write out letters. It would occasionally start purring, a sound a little like a crackling fire, and eventually Meng Yao got into the habit of going to run his fingers through its fur as a reward for himself when he successfully completed a training sequence.

After a while, he started talking to it, too.

“That commander,” Meng Yao said as he brought the training saber down. His real saber was still on the order, probably stalled purposefully; the smith assigned the task was probably one of the people that thought they were too good to deal with him because of who his mother was, and it’d all been a waste of money in the end. Completely a waste, even if Nie Mingjue had smiled so happily at him when he’d heard about Meng Yao placing the order, his eyes warm and soft and how had that man survived so long in this wretched world of politics and pain, didn’t he know he would always be deceived and betrayed?

Why should he be the exception to the rule, when everyone else had to suffer?

Meng Yao threw away the unhelpful thoughts and thrust the saber forward, as if piercing his invisible opponent straight through the chest.

“That commander.” He minutely corrected his form and stabbed again, this time as if piercing through the belly: a gut wound, a slow and awful way to die. “He’ll regret what he said to me.”

The cat’s purring intensified.

Meng Yao briefly had the wild thought that it approved.

“I just –” Another thrust. “– need to figure out –” An overhead slash. “– how.”

-

Meng Yao ended up taking the cat with him when he left Qinghe.

It probably was someone’s pet and he was opening himself up to a charge of stealing, a charge he wouldn’t be able to defend himself against now that he no longer had Nie Mingjue’s protection –

(Nie Mingjue who had wept tears and blood at what Meng Yao had done, betrayed at last after having finally encountered a deception he could not swallow, who had banished him from the Unclean Realm even after everything Meng Yao had done for him – who had, despite it all, still hidden an entire bag of gold and Meng Yao’s favorite Qinghe snacks in Meng Yao’s things with a short note claiming that it was for unpaid wages. As if Meng Yao had ever let a single pay period go by without claiming exactly what he was due. As if Nie Mingjue still cared despite throwing him out, as if he worried about how Meng Yao might live, as if he hadn’t given up the privilege of caring about things like that – )

He didn’t really care.

He wanted the cat, so he took it. It was the least Qinghe could do for him.

The cat spent all its time in his new rooms in the hotels he stayed out as he traveled: in his bedroom and study, the little gardens that, when available, he liked to use to train in the mornings and evenings. It would even follow him when he took a bath (although that was with great reluctance on the part of the cat, and only if Meng Yao were taking an especially long time in the bath and the cat was worried he’d drowned, yowling angrily as if it could revive him through the power of its voice). If it had once belonged to someone else, it now belonged to Meng Yao, and Meng Yao didn’t give away anything that was his.

“I’ve made worse mistakes,” he said defiantly to the cat, which blinked at him from its side of the carriage he’d used some of the gold to rent. “It’s only that I don’t want to review them in order to think of which ones those might be.”

The cat got up, stretched its back, and walked over to butt its head against Meng Yao’s hand before turning and going back to its spot by the window.

Meng Yao wasn’t sure if that was a sign of agreement or if the cat just thought there was a treat in his hand. Not that the cat had ever accepted treats from his hand.

He still wasn’t sure what the cat ate, actually, but he was sure the cat would make its feelings known now that they weren’t somewhere with a dependable kitchen, though he supposed there was always the possibility that it would start picking up hunting.

“Wen Chao said that they’d aimed at the Cloud Recesses,” Meng Yao said, deciding not to dwell on the things of the past. There was nothing he could do about it. Nothing he could do about Nie Mingjue’s betrayed eyes or the snacks he hadn’t even known Nie Mingjue had known he’d liked, about the hand-me-down guans and trinkets that Nie Huaisang had insisted were part of his wardrobe when he’d helped him pack even though he knew Nie Huaisang still wore them sometimes, about the fact that he should have been ordered to take the Nie sect’s braids out of his hair when he passed by the gates for the final time since he didn’t deserve them anymore but the two disciples there had just nodded at him and let him pass without a word – nothing to do about the saber he’d ordered, still on the list to be made, and maybe if he made something of himself out in the world alone he would one day come back to claim it at last. “That’s where we’re going now. Lan Xichen might be in danger. I have to help him.”

The cat made a sound like it was considering hacking up a hairball.

“He was kind to me,” Meng Yao said, feeling defensive. “The only one who never judged me –”

Since he’d decided to forget about Nie Mingjue and Nie Huaisang, wiping it out of his mind as if it had never been, that was even true.

“– and he’s a proper gentleman, a good man. I’ll help him.”

That Lan Xichen was also a powerful man was something he wished he didn’t think of, but he couldn’t help the way he was.

“After I help him, I’ll figure out what to do next,” Meng Yao said, like a liar, and the cat looked at him like he was stupid – which he was being, because of course he’d already planned out what to do next, figured out his next move, and there was no point in lying to a cat about it. Meng Yao had skills that were only useful in management, not labor, and the only thing he left to sell was information about the sect from which he’d just been ejected. “No one owns me, right? Let it be the Wen sect.”

The cat did not purr, but it didn’t condemn him, either.

That would have to do.

-

It was a good thing that Meng Yao’s cat was self-sufficient, he thought, because he had neither the time nor the stomach to feed it during his time at the Wen sect.

If he had thought he had worked hard at the Nie sect, he now knew differently: at least there the worst he had faced from his colleagues had been disdain and not outright murder attempts, back-stabbing and undercutting to try to show off to Wen Ruohan, and all the while the man himself demanded more and more from him without the slightest care for his own well-being. He was grist to the mill for Wen Ruohan, no matter how much the Chief Cultivator enjoyed having another man’s prized deputy as his own – Wen Ruohan might had been very nearly driven insane by the Yin Metal, but he still remembered old grudges – and it was night and day away from Nie Mingjue’s reliance on him that was based on trust, rather than reluctantly satisfied suspicion and paranoia.

Meng Yao had hidden the cat as best as he could from the start, thinking rightfully that people would try to use it against him, and to his relief it seemed that no one else had yet laid eyes on it and identified it as his own, despite its white fur standing out like a beacon to his sight. Unfortunately there were some people that had managed to figure out that he had a cat, even if they didn’t lay eyes on it themselves, and he’d had more than a few incidents in which someone had left poisoned meat out on the floor by his room in order to catch it.

The cat seemed as unimpressed with that as anything else.

Instead, the cat seemed to have taken up hunting as its pastime. It brought back the corpses of small birds, the Yin Metal-infused little spies, full of resentful energy, that Wen Ruohan had developed for his sons to use. At first Meng Yao worried about the cat getting somehow poisoned by them, but time went on and it seemed to be fine, even thriving. It had grown into a proper cat now, no longer a kitten, and it enjoyed licking its white and shining fur until it was gleaming.

It didn’t like Meng Yao’s training sessions as much – he trained with a sword now, two-faced just like him, and in a dozen different styles, Wen and Jiang and Jin, always Jin – so sometimes Meng Yao would go back to doing the old Nie sect style again, knowing the cat would recognize the familiar movements, and it was a surefire way to get the cat to purr.

The Nie sect style was also still the best for getting out anger, all aggression and sharp movements, and Meng Yao still had a lot of anger inside of him. He was starting to think he always would.

At least here in the Nightless City he could kill the people he hated, as long as he did so in low and dirty ways that didn’t trouble Wen Ruohan or interfere with his plans, and yet every time he did it, he felt no relief, only a vile and wretched stickiness that came, perhaps, from that awful Yin Metal that he had schemed over yet couldn’t seem to escape.

The cat didn’t like the Yin Metal one bit. It hissed and scratched, and in one notable incident seemed like it was going to pounce on it directly if Meng Yao hadn’t caught it mid-leap and shoved it into his sleeve before anyone had noticed it.

“You’re going to get me into trouble,” Meng Yao told the cat next time he trained, using the soft sword he’d hidden away for a time of need to hack and slash in the Nie way, which didn’t work with a soft sword at all but which made him feel strangely better. He was currently imagining Wen Ruohan’s head underneath a saber, his head and the heads of all those corpse puppets he’d created. “I will cut you loose if you do that.”

The cat rolled onto its back and showed its soft and fluffy belly, which only the truly unwise would seek to lay a hand on – Meng Yao still had scars – and Meng Yao rolled his eyes. “Yes, yes, I know,” he said. “No one owns you, not even me. But do me a favor and don’t screw this up for me. Not when I’m so close.”

Lan Xichen had been accepting his letters and feeding them to Nie Mingjue, who trusted as blindly as he ever did. Meng Yao wished sometimes that he didn’t, that he would learn, that he would put some defenses up on that stupid reckless heart of his, but on the other hand it suited his plans very well that he didn’t.

Soon, he thought. Soon.

Soon he’d know what he needed to do.

-

“Now he chooses not to trust people,” Meng Yao complained to his cat. “Now. Now!”

The cat purred.

It wasn’t that Meng Yao (damnit, Jin Guangyao, he had a new name, he was Jin Guangyao now) couldn’t understand Nie Mingjue’s reluctance to trust him – fool me once, fool me twice, but three times seemed to be the other man’s breaking point – and in some ways he understood it more than ever now that he had been accepted back by the Jin sect, clothed in the gold he’d always deserved to wear.

Jin Guangshan hadn’t lost much in the war, not like the other sects, and the second it was over he was already scheming. Meng Yao – Jin Guangyao – was pulled right into the thick of it at once, less for his spying capability than for his sheer disposability, the fact that Jin Guangshan wasn’t willing to burden his pure and righteous heir with black matters that he was more than happy to taint the son of his whore with. With Nie Mingjue, general and hero of the Sunshot Campaign, representing the only real threat to the Jin sect’s domination, even if he didn’t want to be, Jin Guangyao was bound to be in opposition to him.

It made sense for Nie Mingjue not to trust him.

It irritated him regardless.

Still, lack of trust or no, Nie Mingjue had succumbed to Lan Xichen’s impassioned arguments and had agreed to swear brotherhood with him, even if Jin Guangyao suspected that Nie Mingjue’s primary motivation was to keep a better eye on him and scold him the way he did Nie Huaisang. It would be politically beneficial to Jin Guangyao to be tied in such a way to Nie Mingjue – it would suit his own desires as well, though that was less important – and so he had of course agreed as well, and he was planning on going to their oath ceremony in the outfit he had chosen for himself, gold from neck to foot, a sword he’d taken from the treasury since no one would order him one of his own, and a hat on his head like the ones his mother so admired to make up for his lack of height and to hide the Nie sect braids he still habitually wore underneath.

An old habit, and one he really ought to break, really. Ideally before Nie Mingjue figured it out and told him to cut it out.

There was a knock on the door, a familiar pounding, and the cat looked up, intrigued, even as Jin Guangyao sighed voicelessly to himself. Perhaps he had waited too long.

Perhaps it would be better to make a clean cut in this way, too.

He opened the door.

“Sect Leader Nie,” he greeted, thinking to himself that it would only be a few more hours before he was entitled to call the man da-ge as if they were nearly equals and how strange that would be. “Can this humble one help you?”

“Can I come in?” Nie Mingjue asked gruffly, his eyes lingering on Jin Guangyao’s uncovered and Nie-braided hair, just as he might have expected. Had expected.

Jin Guangyao nodded and stepped back, allowing him in, and closed the door behind him. “Could I get the sect leader some refreshments?” he asked politely, but Nie Mingjue seemed to have come to a stop right in the entranceway, surprise written all over his features. “Sect Leader Nie?”

Nie Mingjue was staring at Jin Guangyao’s cat.

“…Sect Leader Nie?”

Did Nie Mingjue not like cats? There were an endless number of feral cats in Qinghe, so it seemed implausible, and yet, here Nie Mingjue was, looking at the cat like he’d never seen such a thing before in its life.

Of course, at that exact moment, Jin Guangyao’s cat, the traitor, hopped off its pillow and went straight to rub itself against Nie Mingjue’s leg, purring like a little maniac.

Jin Guangyao stared at it, feeling thoroughly betrayed by what he would have previously said was his thoroughly unsociable cat, who had taken years to warm up to him enough to give him half the attention it was now bestowing freely on Nie Mingjue. Was this the heavens deciding to mock him for his earlier betrayals?

Alternatively, Nie Mingjue might just be very good with cats, which Jin Guangyao could believe. Perhaps he even carried in his pockets some of the Qinghe vine that cats were said to be so enamored of, although certainly Meng Yao’s cat had never once before shown an interest in such things before.

“…what’s its name?” Nie Mingjue croaked, voice hoarse. He was still staring fixedly at the cat, looking as though his entire world had shattered around him. He hadn’t even looked so unsettled when Jin Guangyao had so viciously mocked him at the Nightless City, and at the time he’d thought he was going to die and be turned into a corpse puppet to murder all his loved ones.

Jin Guangyao was tempted to say something rude or facetious, something like ‘I just call it Cat, why, do you name random cats?’, but the cat had been a good companion of his for a long time now and he couldn’t do that to it, even if he was currently planning on taking an extra long bath to force the cat to miserably linger by the door to the bathing room, screeching in unhappiness at the wet, but bravely (if grumpily) supervising him to make sure he didn’t drown.

“Hensheng,” he said, because that was in fact what he’d named it – it meant hatred for life, which was not exactly an auspicious name but which had stuck from the very moment he had thought it up – and waited to hear Nie Mingjue’s judgment. “It’s not normally quite so sticky,” he added in an attempt to save some face. “With most people.”

“Well, it’s me, that’s different,” Nie Mingjue said, and maybe the man really was just the human incarnation of the plant cats liked so much. Meng Yao really wouldn’t put it past him. “You...you cultivate in the Nie sect style? Still?”

Jin Guangyao blinked, surprised by the change in subject.

“Yes,” he said, a little hesitantly. He cultivated many styles now, although it was always the Jin sect style when he was in public. But he still had all the anger in his belly to vent – even more so now than before, anger at his father, anger at Madame Jin, anger at his brother born to a blessed life, anger at all those disciples that sneered at him even after he’d been legitimized, anger, anger, anger – and the Nie sect style had always been the best for that.

And anyway, it made the cat purr.

“Is that a problem, Sect Leader Nie?” he asked.

“Not at all,” Nie Mingjue said, and when he turned to look at him his eyes were warm and soft the way they’d been all the way before the fiasco with Xue Yang, shimmering with tears of joy and a smile that seemed to come straight from his heart, the foolish easily deceived man. It was so unexpected that Jin Guangyao actually took a full two steps back, his jaw dropping a little. “I’m happy for you. Very happy.”

He actually wiped at his eyes with his sleeve, dashing away the tears.

“You should come back to the Unclean Realm to pick it up when the brotherhood ceremony is done,” he added nonsensically. “I can’t imagine how long it’s been waiting for you.”

“…what?” Jin Guangyao said. “Pick up what?”

“Hensheng,” Nie Mingjue said, which – what? “Your saber. Hensheng.”

His saber?

The saber he’d never gotten, having been banished from the Unclean Realm before the order was finished, the one he’d spent all his savings on just in putting in the deposit, the one he’d never actually finished paying off? He remembered it, of course, and sometimes it still itched under his skin that he’d never gotten what he was owed because everything that was owed to him he deserved to get in the end. But…

“Hensheng is my cat,” he said.

Nie Mingjue blinked at him. “That’s not a cat,” he said. “That’s a saber spirit.”

Jin Guangyao’s gaze dropped down to the cat.

The cat that never seemed to eat anything or drink anything, that never once fell for the poisoned meat or accepted his offers of treats, that no one in the Nightless City had ever seen with their own eyes; the cat that could consistently get into his rooms despite there being no holes for it to enter, as if it had simply passed through the walls like a ghost.

Like a spirit.

The cat, which purred whenever Jin Guangyao practiced the Nie sect forms, swinging a saber with rage in his heart.

The cat to which he had confessed all his anger, all his frustration, all his rage, all the feelings he never gave to any human being around him – the sabers of the Nie sect thrived on such emotions, those feelings that encouraged them and strengthened them, developing the saber spirits that made each one of them a spiritual weapon unlike any other, with power and rage infused into the very blade.

Saber spirits, which only those born into the Nie sect or adopted early, raised in their ways, one of them, could form.

“A saber spirit?” Jin Guangyao said weakly, and his knees suddenly didn’t seem strong enough to hold him; he swayed and Nie Mingjue stepped forward quickly, catching him by the shoulders to steady him. “I cultivated a saber spirit?”

“The saber is back in the Unclean Realm,” Nie Mingjue said, not without kindness. “It was only ever waiting for you to pick it up once you developed the spirit, so that you could introduce the two.”

“It hasn’t been – I would have thought it would have been thrown away, or repurposed –”

“It’s a Nie saber, Meng Yao. It won’t obey anyone else ever again, not in this life; it is yours, yours alone. When one day you die, it will be buried with honor in our saber halls, just like all the others.”

The cat looked up at him and purred.

No one owns me, Jin Guangyao thought – the first thing the cat had said to him, and he’d always had a good understanding of what the cat wanted from the very first. No one had owned that wild spirit then, but it had stayed by his side, at first from curiosity and later from habit, and it was his now.

His, and no one else’s.

“Will you come pick it up?” Nie Mingjue asked, hope in his eyes. “Will you come home, if only for a little while?”

“Yes,” Jin Guangyao said. “Yes, I will.”

-

Later, Jin Guangshan told his son to kill Nie Mingjue, that fool who trusted too much and didn’t know when he was being deceived, finding him in his rigidity and righteousness too much of a burden on the power he planned to wield.

Jin Guangyao bowed as deep as he could, a smile on his lips, saying nothing, and the next day, when Jin Guangshan went to the brothel as he always did, drinking tea served by his son the way he always did, he never did figure out why his heart had stopped.

(The saber Jin Guangyao began to wear openly after the funeral – a gift from his sworn brother, he said with a smile, in remembrance of his time at the Nie sect – purred in pure satisfaction.)