#I find a lot of women on YouTube who are like ‘you’re not alone. I’m with you Mama. your miracle will come’

[kweenkatsuki-main]

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[strniohoeee]

hii i was thinking you could do a smutty fic where y/n is the triplets bsf and she lives with them,and they go out to dinner one night and y/n was like wearing i very revealing dress and matt couldnt contain himself so when they got home matt went to hang out in y/ns room(alone) and he says something along the lines of “i looked so fucking hot today” and then makeout the session and then smutty smut smut,if u cant that’s totally okay love u and ur fics bae😝

Creepin

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: After dinner, and Y/N wearing a short dress Matt’s feeling a bit conflicted….and turned on??🗣️

Warnings⚠️: SMUT SMUT SMUT. There’s nothing like crazy crazy at least that’s how I feel, but uhhh they definitely FUCKIN🖤

Song for the imagine: Creepin- Metro Boomin, The Weeknd, 21 Savage

⚠️This is an 18+ imagine, so minors do not interact, or do??⚠️

And if you’re Creepin, please don’t let it show

Oh baby, I don’t wanna know

The triplets had decided to have dinner at a fancy restaurant for hitting 5 million subscribers on YouTube. They invited Madi and I.

I have never been out to a fancy restaurant, so I was so excited to play dress up especially with Madi! We both decided on wearing black mini dresses, and we looked so hot

As we walked out to the living room we hear Chris

“Can we get a little commotion for the dress!! Holy shit yall look good” he said

“Thank youuuu” we both said giggling

Unbeknownst to Y/N, Matt was struggling to rip his eyes away from her. The way the dress hugged her curves, made her breast pop and her legs look long and beautiful. He was struggling badly

We had called an Uber to to the restaurant, and when we got there Madi and I felt so fucking luxurious. I mean high ceilings, thousand dollar light fixtures, hot older men….we were having a blast

“Holy shit we could find a sugar daddy” I said to them

“Omg let’s be on the lookout” Madi said winking at me

It seemed like they hired good looking people here because the waiters and waitress were out of a fucking model catalog

“Nick I see a whole lot of eye candy for you” I said looking over at him

“You’re fucking telling me…..my mouth is on the floor” he said looking around

“The women are hot too” I said winking at Chris and Matt

“I’m seeing a lot of blonde….not really my type” Chris said

“Not really my vibe” Matt said looking at the girls

“Your fucking loss every bodies hot here” I said to them

We had a waiter who was the definition of a wet dream. Black slicked back hair, dark eyes, tan skin and sharp facial features

“Dude he’s checking you out” Madi said

“Ehhh he’s alright” I said to her

“Alright? That man’s so fucking fine” Nick said

“10$ says he will flirt with you when he comes back” Madi said

“You have a bet” I said reaching my hand across the table and shaking her hand

When the waiter came by he gave us our drinks, and came back to me to take our orders. Everyone ordered before me and finally it was my turn

“And for the beautiful lady?” He asked me

“Oh…umm I’ll have the steak, medium well, and what are the sides?” I asked looking up at him

He flashed a sideways smile before looking at my lips and reading me the sides

“I’ll do the mashed potatoes and the Cesar salad” I said closing my menu and handing it to him

“Great pick pretty” he said all flirty, and then walked away

“You owe me 10 fucking dollars” Madi said laughing at me

“Why do guys who I don’t find attractive always hit on me” I said rolling my eyes

“Because you’re hot, ummm you radiate feminine power and you smell good” she said to me

“Boooo boring” I said to her

“Ouu how much you wanna bet he’ll leave his number and give us some type of discount” Chris said wiggling his brows

“Alright let’s not use her looks to take advantage” Matt said chiming in

“The number maybe, but a discount I doubt look at this place too boujee” I said to Chris

We had all finished our dinner, and gotten dessert and it was time for the bill to come around

The waiter came up to me, and handed me the bill while winking….bold fucking move

I opened the check and my jaw dropped

“SHUT THE FUCK UP” I said laughing

“WHAT IS IT” Nick yelled

“He fucking gave me his number, and gave the whole bill 20% off” I said laughing

“NO FUCKING WAY” Chris and Madi said

“I just saved yall 100 dollars” I said passing the bill down to Matt

“Dude you’re coming with us everywhere” Chris said shaking his head

“You gonna call him?” Madi asked

“Fuck no, but if I want a discounted meal I might” I said shrugging my shoulders

“Ew what a fucking loser he put a heart next to his number” Matt said laughing

“I was thinking the same thing” I said laughing with Matt

We had gotten another Uber back home, and everyone went to sit on the couch to watch a movie, but I decided to go to my room because I was so tired

I had changed and took off my makeup, washing my face and had been scrolling on tik tok for 20 minutes before I heard a knock at the door

“Come innn” I said locking my phone and putting it down

“Hey” Matt said coming in

“Oh hey Matt” I said smiling at him

“Can I chill with you? They’re being so loud and annoying out there” he said

“Of course you don’t have to ask” I said as he walked over and sat on the bed

“Do you have any plans for tomorrow” I asked Matt

“Nah, I think they want to film a vlog” he said sitting in front of me

“Oh funnnn” I said cracking my knuckles

“You should come with to film” he said

“Maybe I have some plans tomorrow morning, but after sure” I said to him

“Ouuu plans with the waiter?” He said wiggling his brows

“Oh god no eww” I said laughing

“God you just looked so hot today in that outfit” Matt blurted out

“WHAT?” i said genuinely shocked

“I mean….uh I’m not sure why I said that” he said blushing

“I appreciate it, I really do especially coming from you” I said smiling at him

“Oh yeah?” He asked

“Yeah Matt. I have liked you for so long I have waited for the day you’d compliment me” I said to him

“I have liked you so much too…..I’m so glad we feel the same” he responded

“You looked so hot tonight too” I said batting my lashes at him

“I did?” He asked honestly shocked that I called him hot

“Matt you’re really fucking hot. Not sure how you don’t know this” I said laughing at him

“Just kiss me already you’re begging for it at this point” he said laughing

I rolled my eyes at him and grabbed him by his shirt pulling him in and crashing our lips together

When I pulled away his pupils were dilated and his breathing was shallow

“I have wanted to do that for so long” he said looking at my lips

“Me fucking too” I said licking my lips

I pulled him back in for another kiss, and slowly we started to make out. I eventually scooched down, and Matt was above me now

Kissing my lips to my jaw then down to my neck.

“Do you want this?” He asked me

“More than anything” I said out in a sigh

Matt began kissing my neck again, and came back up to make out with me again our tongues fighting for dominance as our teeth clashed together

I pushed Matt back, so I could remove my shirt

“No bra” he said tilting his head

“Oh yes my bad I was getting ready for bed, and wasn’t expecting to fuck you, so how dare I not have some decorum” I said sarcastically

“Shut up” he said biting his lip before kissing me again moving his kisses down to my neck, and then to the valley of my breasts slowly moving to take my left nipple into his mouth, sailing his tongue around it

“Fuck Matt” I moaned out

He then went to my right nipples taking that one into his mouth as well

As he was doing that he slid his hand down to my waistband, and slowly slid his hand into my underwear snaking his hand to my pussy

“So wet” he said before licking my nipple and taking it back into his mouth

I just mewled at this feeling so fucking good

He slowly started to rub my clit and then switched to my left nipple

“Matt this feels so good keep going” I said running my hands through his hair

He slowly slid his middle finger into my pussy stretching me out, and causing me to gasp at the feeling, slowly pumping his finger in and out of me. About two minutes later he add his ring finger in

“FUCK” I yelled out

“SHHHH” he says laughing and covering my mouth

“SORRY” I said laughing with him

He kept fingering me for a good two minutes before I stopped him

“Baby I need more” I said looking into his eyes, and he nodded

Matt removed his pants and boxers, and the removed my pants and underwear

“Spit” he said holding his hand out, so I did

He then brought his hand down to his dick slowly stroking it

“I could cum right now” he says rolling his eyes back

Once he got his dick wet he then came down and licked a strip up my pussy

“Oh my god” I said shuddering

He slowly slid his dick in, us gasping as he pushed in further

“Alright we have to be really quiet” he said bottoming out

“Yes baby anything for you” I said nodding

“Good” he said and slowly started to thrust into me

Matt was pounding into me and I’m sure the whole house was hearing it if they were out in the living room

“Fuck Matt” I said clenching down onto him

“Keep doing that baby, and I won’t make it much longer” he said as he thrusted into me

Matt then turned me onto my left side lifting my right leg up and started to pound into me

“FUCKKK MATT” I screamed out

“SHUT UP” he said and smacked my ass

“I’m sorry it feels so good” I said with my eyes shut and my brows furrowed

Matt kept thrusting into me harder and faster, and I’m sure everyone had to hear us fucking at this point

“Fuck Matt I’m gonna cum” I said

And he brought his hand down to my clit using his thumb to rub the sensitive bundle

“SHIIIITTT” I moaned out clenching down on him harder

“Come on baby give it to me” he said thrusting harder

Matt started to rub harder and pound into me harder

“IM CUMMING IM CUMMING” I yelled out and clenched down on him as I came all over him. My thighs shaking and my knees bending as my toes pointed…..this was the most intense orgasm of my life

“Matt Matt Matt” I said as I was still coming down from my high

He let me ride out my high, and then pulled out of me stroking his dick, and cumming all over my pelvic bone and lower stomach

His lower abdomen constricting and his body shuddering forward

“Fuck fuck fuck” he said as he rode out his high

He went and grabbed a wet towel to wipe me down

“Lets shower baby” Matt said

“I agree, and maybe round 2 in the shower” I said winking at him

“I’m do-“ before he could finish his sentence we were cut off

There was banging on my ceiling coming from upstairs….Nicks room

“STOP FUCKING WEVE HEARD ENOUGH” we heard Nick yell through the vents

“SORRY” we screamed back

“IM FUCKING SCARRED” we heard Chris yell back

“WERE SORRY WERE HEADING TO FUCK IN THE SHOWER NOW” Matt yelled and I smacked him

“FUCK YOU GUYS! YOURE SICK” Nick yelled back

We ended up laughing, and heading over to the shower.

The End

Hope yall enjoyed this one too, and I’m about to start my last request and then I’m going to post my own ideas for imagines🖤🖤🤭

-J💅🏽

[amiableness]

hey elina! i saw lily pad anons ask and i thought i’d give my two cents even though no one asked, feel free to post this or not i just have thoughts.

i think the word you’re looking for is misandrist, someone who despises men. when i was a senior in high school i was talking to my english teacher about how i hated all the men in our class and that men suck etc. she told me that i was not a misandrist but honestly at the time it felt like a word i identified with. between my father and boys in my life who’d done me wrong, i hated men. but i realized that hate wasn’t a productive feeling. There’s this creator on youtube called Contrapoints who has a very interesting idea about having empathy for men. Women are encouraged to be in touch with their emotions and form close female friendships and men don’t have anything similar. we tell them the way they preform masculinity is bad, but society doesn’t have a lot of good role models to show them an alternative way. Another creator i think lilypad anon would be interested in is Binchtopia, they have a podcast and i’m currently listening to their back catalogue and it’s very interesting and enjoyable. girls are always taught to value friendships at a young age but i feel like at a certain point it’s replaced by valuing romantic partnerships. which is why friendships can fall apart when one person enters a relationship. i have a friend who has been in a relationship with a cesspool of a man and i always tell her, hey, that’s emotional abuse, hey, think about why he’s doing that. hey, he’s trying to control you. and while it’s emotionally exhausting to go through that cycle as her friend, i’m always going to be there for her if she decides to leave him (hopefully soon, he’s a manager where she works and is 12 years older than her, and has dated underage girls). but i’ve always tried not to belittle her for her feelings, i think the most important part is compassion. i think girls make excuses for the guys they love is because it’s a harsh reality to face when you realize the other person doesn’t care about you the same way.

people are born with gut instincts for a reason and i think you should Always listen to it. it’s better to be safe than sorry. i think lilypad anon has an (albeit negative) realistic outlook on love and relationships. if you guys are in high school i think you’re friends will probably grow out of this phase, especially if they take a women’s and gender studies course in college lol. what they say about developing a prefrontal cortex is true and they’ll hopefully realize one day before it’s too late. having high standards for men is always good because one day you’ll find a great guy (or not maybe a girl or you’ll want to be alone) but that’ll be hard if you’re wasting away with a loser.

sorry for the long rant i just had to say something- m

hi love!

thank you so much for your thoughts! i’ll post so 🪷 or anyone else that is interested can read!

[hadesoftheladies]

alrighty, so the making of the channel is already underway. this is something I’m committed to trying out. but I feel like a lot of this would be even better if I had a small discord for women and girls on radblr who want to help me out with a few minor details.

in the discord group:

1. You’ll be the beta-viewers. You will see every video before it is uploaded and critique it in terms of info or any other relevant details. You’ll help me refine the details (in terms of suggestions) but I’ll do all the production work. You could even find like-minded women or radfem allies who would want to be interviewed or partake in the channel, once it’s been running for a while.

2. You’d help me out with topic recommendations and research. Dropping links to books, articles, tiktoks and videos, to new topics.

This is all I’d need from the discord. That, and probably some encouragement. I know for sure I cannot embark on this journey alone. So if you’re interested in helping me out in this way, please DM me. I really want to this YouTube channel to be FOR YOU guys first and foremost. Your comfort, entertainment, etcetera. I’m even hoping to get to the point where I can advertise some of your feminist merch and designs. :)

Any of you down?

[allgrrl78]

Me Talking to the World

I think I’d be better as a best friend than a girlfriend, sometimes 😬

Like, if you want a girl who’s so glamorous, steps out in 5-inch stilettos, polished long nails and a face that’s really dolled up and effortlessly beautiful, wearing gorgeous hair and a dress that’s so elegeant - nah, that’s NOT me, hehe (although I appreciate women who are glamorous and take really good care of themselves).

I try to look decent… and my reason for exercising is really just to get the blood circulation going. My sense of adventure is in having deep conversation across the landscape of your mind.

Talk to me, debate with me, have coffee or a mojito with me, have a smoke with me, go on a road trip with me, have a food adventure with me, watch an outdoor concert with me, watch a live band with me, watch a movie with me, watch the stars with me, look for Venus or Saturn with me, maybe even sing with me. I’m a creature of comfort so none of those 10,000 steps a day activities with me.

I’m the girl in the dress in summer while the rest are in bikinis. I’m the girl driving a 20-yr old manual transmission car blasting indie songs. I’m the girl re-watching Sopranos and watching the non-popular but Oscar-worthy movies they won’t show on your local cinema. I’m the girl lining up in a museum to view art and history, and takes a thousand photos where only 1% gets posted on her Instagram account. I’m the girl who appreciates reels, Tiktok videos and Youtube shorts but will never make one. I’m the girl who tales candid photos of people she likes because it tells a story more than a posed one. I’m the girl who takes the back roads.

I try not to be a hypocrite. I hate crowds (except for concerts because we’re all united in appreciating the music), and get worn down by loud noise. I need time alone to recover but if I like the company, I can spend an entire evening out.

I can be sweet and appreciate sweetness in return. I appreciate intimacy but the moment I feel that you’re acting out your porn fantasies with me, I’m gonna buzz out. It makes it feel so arranged and unorganic. Ewww. What I find sexy is seeing someone passionate about their goals and aspirations - even if it means you’re busy half or even most of the time.

Unexpected and natural are what makes something memorable for me. Relaxed and comfortable? Ahhh, I’m in. And if there’s a lot of fun and funny conversations, I’ll never leave, hehe.

So, I’ll say hey… I’ll keep it casual. Because that’s the best version of me. The one that doesn’t overthink. Anything outside this sphere, and I become either detached or too bothered - the latter is what I hate the most.

I’m a girl who just wants to be happy with people who want me to be happy with them 😊

————

This piece is written for me to go back to whenever I feel like I’m not myself anymore.

[pornaddictionsymptoms]

RETHINKING SUCCESS: BEYOND THE MYTH OF SEX

Sex is not the most important thing in the world.

Is that hard for you to believe? If so, you aren’t alone. A brother in the free Porn Reboot Facebook group heard it on another YouTube channel and brought it to our group. He was having trouble wrapping his head around the idea that sex isn’t necessarily the thing to strive for. The way he sees it, men strive to work and generate wealth so they can attract women into their lives.

I notice this a lot with men who are still early on in their reboot. If you’re thinking this way you’re not the only one, but it also indicates where you’re at in your reboot. When men first start their reboot, they believe they need to experience a lot of novelty relationships with different women in order to feel satisfied.

Now don’t get me wrong – you’re biologically wired to think this way. At the same time, your pornography addiction destroyed your natural biological functioning over the years and left you thinking that sex is the end goal. It creates the false idea that your whole purpose as a man is to have sex with women. This seems to be especially true if you are a man who isn’t particularly successful with women to begin with.

I want to make it clear that I don’t believe having sex with a variety of beautiful women is a bad thing. In fact, I think it’s a wonderful thing and it’s something that I experienced and enjoyed before my committed relationship. If you don’t have any cultural or religious beliefs holding you back from that, go ahead and explore that aspect of life as a man if you would like to.

At the same time, don’t think that simply generating wealth and becoming a high-value man will automatically give you opportunities to have sex. There are plenty of men with little to no capital who can still pull women because they’re high-value in their own way. You don’t have to be a wealthy man to sleep with women.

As you progress in your reboot, you’ll start realizing that sex for the sake of sex isn’t necessarily success. Porn wants you to think that sex is the greatest thing you can get but there are far more important things to work for. But once you’re free from your porn addiction symptoms you can create your own definition of what success is.

Instead of building wealth to pull women, why don’t you build wealth to pursue freedom? Wealth provides you with freedom to live where you want, freedom of time, freedom from depending on others, freedom to pursue things you’re truly interested in, and more. 

Success doesn’t necessarily mean wealth, either. Plenty of men define success by the quality of the family they have, by keeping their relationship strong, and by raising confident, independent children. Others view success through the lens of their spiritual or religious pursuits and draw a great sense of joy and purpose from them.

Another great definition of success is giving back and being of service. I’m one of those people who finds deep fulfillment in helping others. Now that I’ve overcome my compulsive sexual behavior, there are plenty of times I’m interested in being of service than I am in having sex.

Sure, sex will come as a byproduct of your success and there’s nothing wrong with that. But pursuing sex as the end goal or the definition of success will leave you feeling empty and hollow. Sex for the sake of sex is a biological need but it’s far from fulfilling when it’s the only pursuit in your life. Pursue things that interest you instead and you’ll find much more contentment in life. After that, sex will simply be an added bonus.

[ellana-ravenwood]

The art of taking care of the woman you love - Bruce Wayne x Fem!Reader

Synopsis : You’ve always had really bad period pains. You learned to live with it, and to take care of yourself during those times...Up until a certain Bruce Wayne came into your life, and made it his mission to be there for you. 

For @meghan-maria​, who gotta be the sweetest out there :), and for anyone who ever had really bad period pains. I hope you will like it : 

TW : periods. It’s obvious given the theme, but I guess we never know and better safe than sorry. 

My master list : @ella-ravenwood-archives​

_________________________________________________

The First time it happened

It’s the fact you cancelled your planned date with him without an explanation that makes him worry. 

“Sorry, can’t make it tonight. Will see you tomorrow !” 

You never did that before, and you two were so busy neither of you would miss a date really. Not unless something bad or important happened. But then in that case, you would’ve told him, no ?

It made him so anxious. And he was starting to clearly overthink things. 

Were you maybe...having second thoughts ? 

You and Bruce made your relationship official not long ago, was the media’s pressure becoming too much ? You told him you’d be fine, but after a few months experiencing the plague that were paparazzi and invasive questions, did you change your mind ? 

Or maybe it was because of the whole Batman thing ? You discovered that a while ago, even before making your relationship official so...why would you change your mind about it now ? 

Maybe he came home with too many cuts and bruises. Maybe you were freaking out ? He would understand if you did. 

Or...There was a last option that came to his mind : he upset you somehow. 

It was entirely possible, sometimes he could get stuck in his own mind, and be a jerk without even truly realizing it. He knew that fact very well about himself. It was often the reason of how he ruined multiple relationships, friends or more. 

The way he sometimes just got too focused on his vigilante work. Too obsessed. And could be stuck in a “dark mode” like you’d say...

But, he also knew that you never took any of his shit. You would’ve told him if something was really the matter, right ? 

Right ?!

Should he ask Alfred if he noticed anything ? His butler, and surrogate father, always saw things that escaped him. Especially when it came to feelings. 

This was a less known trait about Bruce, but ever since he was a child, he’s always been anxious. He was usually really good at hiding it, and his “Brucie Wayne” persona made everyone think it wasn’t possible for him to be anything else but confident and cocky but...it wasn’t true. 

Especially when it came to those he cared about. Especially when it came to you. 

You loved him despite his flaws, accepted him fully, without any conditions. It was the first time it ever happened, that he LET it happen...So, with this simple plan cancellation that was quite unlike you, he freaked out a bit.

In the middle of the day, he finally decided to call you. One. Two. Three tones before you picked up, and oh. Oh he felt so relieved to hear your little “hello ?” 

At the same time, his worry peaked. Was it just him, or did you sound really weak ?

“Hey honey, just wanted to check if you were alright ? Your text was a little short, and I know you don’t owe me any explanations of course, but I just wanted to check on you. You know. I-um...” 

Clumsy Brooshy. 

It made you smile, the way he could be a little flustered and lose his words, when with you. And it made you smile even wider that he chose to call you to make sure everything was ok. 

Sweet Broosh.

If you really didn’t want to talk to him, you wouldn’t have answered. And he wasn’t the kind of man to “insist”. He would’ve left a voice message, and leave you alone until you felt like calling him back. Bruce was most definitely not invasive...but at the same time, you’d never leave him worrying for no reasons, knowing how anxious he could be.

The truth was, your text was short because...You didn’t know how to tell him the reasons you needed to cancel your date. You didn’t want to embarrass him. Men didn’t really like to talk about what you currently were suffering from. 

You also were a little embarrassed yourself, because the entire society surrounding you made you feel wrong for having periods. 

Periods. 

One week a month. Every single months. That was a lot. 

Especially for you because...you always had complicated and difficult periods. Painful. Making you feel like you couldn’t move. The pain making it impossible for you to even get out of bed for long. 

You and Bruce had been dating for a while but...weren’t periods sort of a taboo subject ? You didn’t really know how to tell him. Especially since most men really seemed uncomfortable with the all thing. 

Of course, you should’ve know Bruce wasn’t “most men”. 

“Baby, are you there ?” 

“Um yes yes, sorry I was lost in thoughts.” 

“Are you ok ? You don’t sound right.” 

The most observant man in the World was obviously going to realize your voice sounded weaker than usually. The truth was, you were trying really hard to keep it steady as pain filled your being. 

“Yes yes, I’m ok, just feeling a bit...under the weather ?” 

“Is there anything I can do ? Is it a cold or something ? If so, I can bring you buy some chicken noodle soup, and pick up any meds you might need.” 

You almost cried at his words. 

Super busy bee Bruce Wayne was telling you he’d go out of his way to bring you what you needed...It made you crack a little. 

He was too damn nice. And your hormones were in shambles. It was very easy right now for you to cry. 

This. How willing he was to help you, how he immediately asked if he could...Was what made you say the truth without thinking twice : 

“I’m-I’m on my periods. They’re usually- They’re usually bad.” 

“Oh.” 

His response scared you a little bit. Were you right, was this maybe too much, too soon ? You were about to add something when he said : 

“I’ll be there in about an hour, if it’s ok with you ? If you prefer to be alone I can send-” 

“No ! No, I would love for you to come. I just-I wasn’t sure-I-”

“It’s ok. I understand. See you in a bit, love you.” 

“Love you, too.” 

On that note, Bruce hung up and leaves you with a wild beating heart. 

************

Exactly an hour later, your doorbell rings. 

With difficulties, you stand up, and go open the door. Surely enough, it’s your boyfriend. 

“Hi.” 

“Hi.” 

He has a bag in his hand, and you melt a little at the soft look and smile he gives you (even if there’s clear concerns behind it). You let him in, and go sit on the couch, even if just sitting up is already too much. 

“Do you want to lie down ?” 

“No. No I’m fine. You came all the way here, I can’t just stay in bed haha.” 

“Of course you can.” 

There’s a small silence for a little bit. Not awkward, you’re just not quite sure what to do. Should you go back to bed ? You really want to. And clearly, he understands. He always does. 

“Ok.” 

You stand, and wince because moving really makes everything worst. He approaches you, worried, but doesn’t dare to touch you and just follows you into your room. You get back in your comfy bed, under your comfy comforter. 

Another silence. Until he breaks it, taking something out of the bag he was carrying and saying : 

“So. I wasn’t sure you had a hot water bottle, I don’t ever recall seeing one in your apartment. So I bought one on the way just in case. Sorry if you don’t like the color, I can pick another one up later. It’s just, the woman on YouTube said that heat pads and hot water bottles were great.”

“The...woman on YouTube ?” 

“Yes, I watched a video on menstruations on the way here.” 

For a few seconds, you just stare at him, stunned. Never EVER in your entire life did you think you would hear THE Bruce Wayne say those words one day.

“A video on menstruations ?”

“Well, yes. Obviously, I don’t have periods. So I have no idea what it feels like. So I watched a video, to understand the process. And also so that you wouldn’t have to explain anything to me. You know what periods are, you don’t have to educate me on it. It’s not your job. And I definitely don’t want to sound patronizing about it. So I watched a video, and read a few articles. I won’t say I know how it feels, but I understand it more. Tell me if I ever step my bounds at any moment..” 

You can’t help but smile, even as your lower belly is on fire. Ah. Of course he would search things about it. Bruce was the kind of man to be thorough in his researches before tackling a problem. As Batman, he always tried to know everything there is to know about a situation before finding any solutions. But he was like that in real life too. 

And it particularly touched you that he did it so you wouldn’t have to explain...You had an ex, once, who sat down with you to talk about menstruations and it sort of drove you crazy. He thought it was nice, but your hormones were wreaking HAVOC and he was trying to explain to you how periods work and what it felt like ??? Give you advice about it and that it would be fine if you did what he said ?? Excuse me ??? As if you didn’t try everything already to feel less pain. And as if, as a woman, you didn’t know what it felt like or what it was exactly...

And there came Bruce. Reading up on it. And knowing he would never quite know how it feels. But educating himself so he won’t say something that could trigger you in any way. 

Sweet sweet man...If only people knew. 

He caressed your cheek softly, before whispering : 

“Then I-I watched something on endometriosis, because I read in a previous article it felt horrible. And you said your periods were bad, when we were on the phone. It sounds awful. Do you-...Have endometriosis ?” 

You shake your head weakly. Endometriosis was one of the reason why your periods were so painful and dreaded. And the worst ? It was a sickness many people said didn’t even exist. 

A woman being in pain during her periods ? Drama queen. Right ? It didn’t hurt that baaaaad. See, some women didn’t feel anything, just bled for a bit and moved on with their months. So obviously every women felt the same. Some were just being too sensitive...

Endometriosis was still, even to this day, a rather unknown illness and one that was rarely taken seriously. Some people just couldn’t even fathom you being in pain because of your periods, so much so that you couldn’t move. 

That you occasionally fainted, that you couldn’t eat much because it made you vomit, that you had awful migraines, stomach ache and back pain. That you couldn’t focus or sleep because of it. No. 

No those were just “made up symptoms” because you were “weak”...What awful things to say, right ? It was even worst to hear. Someone telling you this, as you felt like you were dying because of the pain, made you feel GUILTY to have painful periods. 

But it wasn’t your fault ? IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT ?! Nor were the moodswings, the cravings, the fatigue...

You hated going to the doctors when you were younger, because you knew he wouldn’t believe you when you said your periods hurt...

Anyway. Even without endometriosis, women who had bad periods pain were rarely taken seriously. Unless they met another woman who felt the same. Then they’d feel like they weren’t alone, or crazy. Like there were others who felt bad too. 

Every woman was different. And you unfortunately never met someone else with the same problems than you...

You felt very alone, for so long, and it was enhanced by your hormones going crazy and the pain being unbearable at times. 

And then, in come Bruce. 

Your Broosh. 

“Ok. Well. I brought you some of your favorite food. And um, I picked up some snacks if you want to do a movie marathon ? I brought all The Lord of the Rings extended editions. I got heat pads and a hot water bottle like I said. We can also just cuddle and relax if you prefer, I read that physical comfort was good ? Or, I can leave everything here, settle you in properly, and leave you alone. Just, tell me what you need my love ?” 

What did...you need ? 

Nobody ever asked you that. Nobody. Not even your parents. 

What did you need ? 

The answer came quickly. 

Him. You need him. His warmth. His large and soothing hands. His comforting presence. His calming voice. 

You knew you were in love with him since a while now. You exchanged “I love yous” already. But never did you feel as much love for him as right now, seeing him sitting in front of you, asking you what you needed...

A simple action. Simple words. And yet, it meant everything. 

“What do you need, honey ?” 

The concern in his eyes, and how he was very obviously ready to do whatever you wanted him to. 

It already made you feel better. The physical pain didn’t go down, that’s not how it worked unfortunately. But the emotional anguish ? Gone. 

Because he was there. 

Without even realizing it, you started crying. This was too much for your heart, too overwhelming. It meant the World, in that moment. 

It meant the world, to you and your overworked hormones. And so you cried. You cried hard. 

Without thinking twice, Bruce moved towards you. Taking his coat off and leaving it on the floor (Alfred would scold him about this for sure), he climbs in your bed and engulfs you in his arms. And it’s so warm and comforting, comfortable, too. 

“Just tell me what you need..”

He whispered to you, in his deep calming voice, his fingers running soothingly through your hair. 

“Could you just...keep holding me ?” 

He smiles softly, and says : 

“Of course.” 

He never, and never would, shy away from comforting you in any way. If you needed to have a good cry in his arms, so be it. And if you just needed him to be there, he would be there. 

You cuddled for a bit, the soothing circles he rubbed on your back doing wonders to make you feel relax. He brought some essential oils, that he massaged on your belly before filling the hot water bottle and laying it there...It relieved the pain a little bit, as you started a marathon of your favorite movies.

He took great care of you all day long, answering your every need even as you didn’t dare to ask...as if he could read your mind. You almost suspected he really could. You never felt so in phase with anyone before like you did with him.  

You had been together for less than a year. Although your anniversary was right around the corner. But him coming over as soon as he knew you weren’t feeling well. Him educating himself on what was it that hurt you...

If you weren’t sure yet that he was the one...You knew now. 

It sucks to be a woman, sometimes 

Bruce never knew periods could be that bad. Well, of course, he was a guy. And “periods” was never really a subject he talked about with anyone. He never really paid attention to it, like many men really. 

Until he saw you while on it. 

He knew you. He knew you were a tough lady. Once, you broke your leg while on a date with him. A silly accident really. Involving an ice rink, and an overzealous you chasing a hockey puck...Long story short, you ended up with a bad break. And you barely said a word about it. 

Bruce had his bones broken many times, he knew the pain of it. It was one of the pain he hated the most, along with burns. One he dreaded the most. And you took it like a champ. 

The break was bad enough you even needed surgery, yet you kept smiling at him (he might’ve feel bad that he let his over-competitive mind take over, “pushing” you to really want that puck...but of course, it was not his fault, after all, you too were very competitive, it was a pure accident). Saying you were fine, and that it’d be ok. 

He always hated seeing you hurt, it hurt him too. Inside. And scared the Hell out of him, to even think about you being harmed. So that day, he was rather frantic. You staying calm helped him, which made him feel a little guilty that even as you were the hurt one, you reassured him. 

But then you reminded him the roles were often reversed when he came back hurt from a rough vigilante night...You always had the right words to ease his mind. 

Anyway. That one time, after badly breaking your leg, you stayed rather calm and collected. But when you had your periods ? 

He never knew it could hurt so much. You couldn’t hide your pain, or pretend everything was alright. 

It was clearly a really bad moment to go through. 

He knew about the terrible migraines, being unable to sleep which made everything worst, feeling like your lower belly was being twisted from the inside, being sore all over for no reasons, not being able to move... 

Seeing you, was enough for him to know that periods sucked. 

“Being a woman is the worst, sometimes!” 

You’d often say during those moments, and he’d just soothe you, wishing he was in your place...

He hated when you were hurting. It hurt him too. Inside. 

And never. NEVER would he doubt that you were in real pain. Because unlike the doctors who kept telling you it was in your head, he knew you. He saw you get injured before. He knew you were tough. So for you to not be able to pretend everything was fine... 

You were hurting. Badly. And it was awful. But he believed you. He believed you and that’s all that mattered to you. 

Space

He also knew how to give you space when you needed it, though. 

He would be here if you needed him, bring you any food you craved, giving you relaxing massages, rubbing essential oils on your belly, filling up your hot water bottle etc etc. 

To be honest, his reaction to you being on your period is what made you sure he would be a great father one day...And you were right. 

Not a perfect father. 

But oh. Oh he cared. And wanted so much to do good...

And he knew. 

He knew exactly when he had to be there, and when he had to give you space. 

His hoodie

Bruce couldn’t always be with you when you had your periods, of course. 

He often took time off to be. But it was unrealistic to think he could be 24/7 with you the entire week. 

And sometimes, when he was away, you really suddenly craved his presence...So you came up with a trick. 

You stole his clothes. 

Particularly, hoodies he often wore when hanging out casually in the Manor. 

First of, they were very comfortable. And second, and most importantly : they smelled like him. 

They were warm, had his scent, and you could fall asleep feeling like he was almost there. 

Bruce couldn’t count the number of hoodies he lost to you....Then again, after a while, you’d ruthlessly abandon one because it stopped smelling like him, and would steal another one. 

Of course, he never minded. In fact, beyond the fact hoodies were nice and comfortable, he started to wear them a lot while in the house or during times he didn’t need to wear a suit (in every sense of the term), specifically because he knew you’d steal them when you felt lonely. 

It was cute. And it made his heart beat faster just thinking about it. 

Nobody. 

Nobody ever needed him that much before. Nobody ever loved him so much that sometimes him not being around was distressing. 

Of course, he felt the same. And the knowledge that you too, would sometimes feel lovesick when you were separated for too long...Filled his heart to the brim with the best feelings. 

For so long, he thought someone being dependable of him, and him being dependable of someone was bad...Oh, how he was wrong. 

It’s not because you open your heart to someone that you’ll get hurt, or that they’ll use it against you. You just have to find the right person... 

So. Yes. He will always cancel plans just to be with you. 

To bring you hot water bottles whenever you need. To cook your favorite food and snacks. To be there during all your mood swings, and endure even if you’re not the nicest to him (it’s not your fault). To watch your favorite movies. To let you sleep in and run your errands...

Periods sucked. 

He didn’t need to be a woman to know that. 

So he was there. Right there. For you. Taking care of you. And he would forever be there for that. 

But when he wasn’t ? 

Then he’d strategically leave one of his hoodie near the bed, so you could steal it, and comfort yourself with his smell...

Mood Swings 

“Brooooooooooosssssh...” 

You’re crying. You’re crying ! 

And it makes Bruce panic. You cry very rarely, so when you do it means something really bad must’ve happened or..or...

Bruce makes a quick calculation in his head and...Yup. 

It’s that time of the month again. 

Already ? Poor you.. 

This means that tomorrow, you’ll be a mess as everything will hurt too much, and today, the eve right before, you’re overly emotional. 

Hence you clinging to him right now, sobbing while repeating “I love you so much Bruce, I love you soooo much”. 

Hormones could really turn your head around. Right at the start of your period, before the pain, you had a rush of many emotions. 

You could either get very irritated for no reason (like “WHY IS THIS FLOOR ON THE FLOOR ?!”) or cry at everything. Right now, you were crying because you realized you loved your Broosh to death and you just had to tell him and you didn’t want him to go that night and...ah...

“It’s alright, it’s alright my love. You’re ok. We’re ok.” 

He lets you cry in his arms, of course. And already made the decision to not go out tonight, and stay with you. Kate could take over. He couldn’t leave knowing your emotions were doing quite a trick on you...

************

Your mood swings during your periods were particularly bad. 

You guessed it went in pairs with all the pain. Of course, not just one thing had to be exacerbated. Oh no. EVERYTHING bad about periods had to be turned to the max for you. Otherwise, were was the fun, right ? Sarcasm. 

You’d get irritated for no reasons. Then feel bad and cry for hours. To then feel ridiculously giddy once again for seemingly no reason...and then suddenly a burst of anxiety would attack you. 

It was a circus in your mind, and in your body. 

You couldn’t focus on anything. You couldn’t sleep properly. You felt awful all the time. Everything hurt. God...

And there he was. Bruce. Taking the brunt of your bad moods without saying a word. He knew it wasn’t your fault. That you didn’t mean it. That your hormones dictated your behavior against your own will. 

He knew. 

And he was there. 

He was there. 

“Every little moment is important, Son” - Thomas Wayne, to Bruce during the Flashpoint events.

“Bruce ? What are you doing here ? Thought you had important meetings ?”

“They weren’t that important.” 

“Really ? Lucious said-”

“Lucious is overdramatic. Anyway, Tim is taking care of it.” 

“...You’re letting our sixteen years old son taking care of the future of your company ?” 

“To be honest, he’s probably more competent about it than me.” 

“...That’s actually pretty accurate. But, why did you cancel things ?” 

“Because it’s this unpleasant time of the month, right ?”

“Oh. You don’t have to-” 

“I absolutely do.” 

Disappearing for a few seconds, your husbands comes back, wearing one of his favorite silk pajamas (and by “his” favorite, he really means : he knows you love them and think they look good on him, but won’t ever admit it because they’re “damn pajamas, it’s silly”...but he likes to please you). He then climbs in bed with you, and settles comfortable against you. 

“So, what’s the program today ?” 

This wasn’t unusual, for him to do this when you were on your periods. 

In fact, it was almost a ritual. Delegating his works to others, so he could take care of you. 

Ever since that first time, all those years ago, things didn’t change much. He would ask you what you need, you’d tell him, and he would do it happily. 

He knew it was a tough moment for you, physically, hormonally, mentally...Having your periods sucked. So he was there. Right there. 

The words his father...Well, not really his father. The “Thomas Wayne” of another dimension. What his father would’ve become if he died that fateful night, instead of his parents. Regardless, to him, it was his father. 

The father that never saw him grow up and became the man he was now...Yet who had important words for him. 

“Take advantage of every little moments, you never know when it’ll end.” 

Those words stuck with him. Because it was true. It only took a few seconds in an alleyway for his whole world to turn upside down...Why would it take any less for it to completely change now too ? 

What if something happened to you ? And he didn’t spend enough time by your side ? Or to his kids ? 

There was a time, being Batman was everything to Bruce. Because he was angry, lost, and devastated. 

But over the years...Over the years this role stayed important. But he expended his vision. He included others in it. 

So. Yes. He would treasure those small moments with you. And if it meant taking a day and night off to take care of you during a rough time, then he’d do it. If it meant missing work (both his works) because one of his children was sick, so be it. 

He was Batman. But he was also a husband. A father. 

And now...Now he knew his priorities. 

He’d never stop being Batman. Never. 

But he knew now. He knew there was more to life than this dark world he thought he’d get stuck in till the end of his life. 

“I was about to watch a movie.” 

“A movie it is. If you want me here, of course.” 

“Do you even have to ask ?” 

“To make sure you’re ok ? Always.” 

“-sigh- Yes. Yes Bruce, I want you here. I want nothing else, in fact.” 

“Ah, not even pop-corn ?”

“...Once we’ll have pop-corn, I’ll want nothing else.” 

“Um, why is there tampons in your drawer ??” 

One day, one of Bruce’s associate, Carlton, needed some paperworks to finish a deal, and came into his office. Bruce was on the phone, and gestured to him to just pick the papers up in one of his desk’s drawer. 

Only the man misunderstood and opened the wrong drawer and...

“What the-Why is there tampons and pads in your drawers ?”

He asked, half-bewildered half-amused. Bruce finished his phone call, and answered : 

“Why wouldn’t there be ?” 

“Um, are you a woman ?” 

“No, but my wife, who often come to this office, is.” 

“Jeez Louise Bruce, never pegged you to be such a simp haha ! Oh man, they’re even “organic”, how far can you go for one woman right ? Haha joking of course, or maybe..haha !” 

There was something in the tone Carlton took that brushed Bruce the wrong way. Something disrespectful and irritating. Not disrespectful to him, as if he cared to be called a “simp” (by a grown ass man by the way, which made it even more ridiculous). No. He didn’t care. But..This was his wife, they were talking about, in the end. 

“A...”simp” ? Because I have items who can be useful to my wife in my desk drawer ? A place in which she often comes, as I already said ?” 

His voice was cold, and Carlton definitely noticed. He always thought Bruce was an affable man, but sometimes...Sometimes he had something almost scary in his eyes. 

Ah, but Carlton wasn’t the kind of man to really take this things seriously. And he added : 

“Come on Bruce, don’t you think it’s a little ridiculous ?”

“No.” 

“I just think it’s funny you have a drawer full of those things.” 

“As I said, my wife comes by often, and might need it sometimes. I keep them here for her. It often came in handy you know.” 

“Don’t say that, that’s so gross.” 

“Why ?” 

“Just thinking about it.” 

“Just thinking about something my wife, but also yours by the way, have no control over ?” 

“My wife doesn’t- We just don’t talk about it.” 

“Well I guess yes. Or you wouldn’t react that way. Do you not take care of her when she has her periods ?” 

At the word “periods”, the man opened his eyes wide, which made your husband roll his. It truly TRULY baffled him that this dude was being grossed by OBJECTS and most likely didn’t take care of his wife ? How could you love someone and not want to comfort them ?! 

“Well, I don’t think she- I- She doesn’t - I ...It’s embarrassing, no ?”

“No.” 

“Well, maybe it’s not with your wife but with mine it has been. She asked me a few times to buy pads for her.” 

“Why would it be embarrassing ? I can assure you, nobody is going to think it’s for you.” 

Carlton’s face was steadily going red. He said : 

“It’s just something we don’t talk about.”

“Why not ?” 

“It’s just...gross and...” 

“Why is it gross though ? Why do you think that way ?” 

“I mean, you know what periods are right ?” 

“Of course I do. It’s something happening to a very large chunk of our population, and that is a natural phase in their life. Do you think your wife wants to have periods ? Most likely not. Mine definitely doesn’t. But she does. So I do keep pads and tampons here in case of an emergency, in case she has nothing else on her.” 

“Nothing else ?” 

“Do you think only pads and tampons exist for women’s periods ?” 

“I-”

“It’s not hard to read up on it a bit. Especially when someone as close as your own wife is a “victim” of it."

Awkard silence. Clearly, the man was uncomfortable. Bruce sighed, and said : 

“Just go take care of those papers.” 

Evidently relieved, his associate almost ran out of the room. 

Bruce kept thinking about how funny Carlton thought it was to have pads in his drawers. How he was about to mock him further before he got called out. “Simp”. If taking care of the woman he loved meant being a simp, then whatever. 

Bruce couldn’t stop thinking about his associate’s words. And it gave him an idea...

The next day, every newspapers and local news channel talked about how the (Y/N) Wayne Foundation gave millions of dollars to every school and public places in the country to provide free tampons and pads to women. And how Bruce Wayne became a huge advocate of the “period positivity” movement his wife started. 

“Periods shouldn’t be taboo.”, he said in his speech for the grand-opening of thousands and thousands of free pads distributors. 

When the kids are around. 

Dick 

Dick was little when he first witnessed what your periods did to you, and he downright panicked when you fainted in front of him while you two were shopping for Bruce’s birthday present ! 

That morning when you woke up, you knew you were going to have your periods. You always felt it in your bones, a little bit before it truly started...But you also promised little Dickie you’d help him chose a gift for your husband. 

You hated breaking your promises. Especially the one you made to your kid. He was just nine, and already experienced so many heartache...You couldn’t just break a promise you made to him, no matter what. 

So you went anyway, knowing there was a high chance you’d feel ill during the day. You were hoping, in fact, your periods wouldn’t truly start up until the evening, and so you could spend the day with your son. 

Alas...

“Mom ? Mom !? Someone help !!” 

Your fainting during your period never lasted long. Just a sudden drop of energy, feeling dizzy, and falling...you woke up fast. Opening your eyes to see your baby boy with tears in his eyes. You knew what happened, and reassured him immediately. 

You refused to call an ambulance, and instead called Alfred to ask if he could come pick you two up (you would NOT risk driving while in this state). 

And there you were, sitting on a bench with your son while waiting for Alfred who would be there as soon as it takes to get from Wayne Manor to Gotham’s City Center. 

“Are you sure you’re ok ?” 

“Yes, don’t worry, this is normal.”

“Fainting is not normal !” 

Dick looked so distressed...Should you tell him what was going on ? But he was such a young child. 

Ah. But you were amongst the people who thought that kids weren’t as stupid as many people thought. And that they could handle the truth, especially this kind of things. 

Understand what was happening to you would surely easy his mind. And make him understand, and act accordingly in the future. Wether with you, or a possible girlfriend ? 

So you do just that. 

You explain to him what is going on. You don’t give too many scientific details, but you explain as best you can so he understands. 

“And every women has it ?” 

“Every women have periods yes. But not everyone’s hurt.” 

“Why do yours hurt ?” 

“We don’t really know. I guess I wasn’t lucky ?”

“Scientists don’t know ?” 

“Well, research on it are rather recents to be honest.” 

“Why ? Women had it long ago too no ?” 

“Yes, but it was a little taboo.” 

“Why ?”

“Patriarchy.” 

“Oh, damn patriarchy.” 

You laugh. You knows he didn’t understand your answer, said as a joke to yourself. But it’s absolutely adorable how he immediately sides with you anyway. 

“When I grow up, I’ll be a scientist. So I can help.” 

“Ah, I thought you wanted to be an adventurer like Indiana Jones ? Or “whatever dad is doing I want to do it too” ?” 

“Well. I can do more than once things at the same time, right ?” 

“Sure you can. You can do anything.” 

He smiles at you, and get closer for a little cuddle. And that’s how Alfred finds you two, your son hugging you, and you hugging him back, on a bench in the streets... 

************

After the initial panic, Dick made it his mission to take care of you. He got really scared when he saw you faint, and would actually be a little...overbearing. 

When he knew you were on your periods, he’d literally forbid you to walk around, and would make sure you had everything you needed. 

His attentions, plus Bruce’s, made you feel like periods weren’t so bad in the end ? 

Even as a grown up, Dick would often come by the manor with your favorite cake, for example, when he knew you didn’t feel well. And he would still get strict with you if he saw you roaming around and getting too busy while he knew you were in pain. 

He’d do whatever you had to, for you. Wether it was cleaning things up, picking groceries...Running any errands for you, so you could rest. 

You were definitely grateful. Even if sometimes, you wish you could just tell him to ease up a bit...Ah. But how could you really ? 

The trauma Dick felt when loosing his parents made him overprotective and rather intransigeant. This was just how he was. And you always loved all your children unconditionally. You could take him being a bit too overprotective sometimes, because oh, oh he brought so much in your life...  

Jason 

You having really bad periods is the reason why when Jason, as a child or an adult, heard anyone say to a girl : “Jeez, why you so moody are you on your periods ?!”, would get mad. 

It was cute to see his little ten years old self lecture grown adults about it : “Periods are really tough on a girl ! It’s not their fault is they don’t feel well or have mood swings, be more empathetic !”. 

And it was still cute to see him as an adult glare at those who’d say this and give them a sermon about why it was wrong, and they better not say it again “or else” (and when a man like your son said the words “or else”, literally no one wanted to find out what he meant by it). 

Once, someone told him, sarcastically : 

“Wow, you drunk a lot of “respect women juice” huh ?” 

“What is that even suppose to mean ? I’m being a decent human being. You should try it sometimes. If respecting women is so foreign to you, that hearing me say what I said is funny and ridiculous, reassess your life mate.”

It’s really not like anyone really wanted to argue with your son. Besides the fact he was very tall, and as a vigilante definitely worked out a lot...he had a “dangerous” air about him. It was his eyes maybe, daring anyone to argue and making them understand he wouldn’t back down without a fight ? 

Ah. But if only people tried to look beyond that. If they only tried to know your son. 

They’d realize he’s the sweetest little buddy around.  

It surprised people that you still called him “little buddy” even as he was fast approaching his mid-twenties. But for you... 

For you he was still that little, sweet Jay he was before he died. The one that you could still see sometimes, behind all his anger, trauma and hurt. 

Ever since he was a child, Jason always felt everything more than anyone around him. He was an “hypersensitive” child. When he was angry, he was enraged. When he was happy, he was the happiest boy on Earth. When he was sad, it was hard to console him. 

When he grew up, and all those bad things happened to him...This trait of his got even more enhanced. It was sometimes hard to reach him under all those negative emotions...Yet. Yet you managed to do it. 

Bruce too...But that was another story. 

For now, you just always felt extremely proud that your son was actually not as harsh as some people thought (the same mistakes they all kept making about your husband...you hated this kind of assumptions). 

He always stood up for the underdogs. And was always respectful, and would voice his opinions. 

Like how he hated when people told women : “ugh are you on your periods ?!” if they were being just a tiny bit difficult (sometimes, not even). 

As a kid, Jason would worry a lot about you when you were on your periods. He hounded Bruce to know if you were ok, which your husband didn’t mind, of course. But he never quite dared to “bother you”. 

Of course, he would never bother you. But Jason was a complicated kid who always worried too much. He didn’t want to get in your way, or annoy you. 

So he had little quiet actions for you. 

Like getting your slippers warm when you’d wake up, by placing them near the radiators all night and putting them right beside your bed before you’d wake up. Or bringing you hot beverages. Baking your favorite treats, and leaving them in strategic places so you’d see it. Or scolding his dad when he thought he wasn’t taking care of you enough haha. 

Jason was a good kid. Nobody would ever change your mind on that. He was a good kid, to whom bad things happened. Yet he never strayed from his principles...No matter how people could see his recent actions. 

Jason was a good kid. 

He was your kid. 

As a child, he hated this week during which you had your periods. He dreaded them as much as you did. Just like Bruce, he had a hard time standing you being hurt...

As an adult. It was the same. And he still had little silent actions to make you feel better. To make your day easier. 

That was Jason for you. 

Such, such a good kid... 

Tim 

Tim, very much like his father, was a boy who needed to always have a plan, and to know everything before finding solutions. 

When you were on your periods, he’d always know. Because he kept a calendar about it. 

Some people might find it weird, but...Why ? He kept count of the days to know when you’d have your periods, so he could act accordingly. So he wouldn’t be caught off guard by one of your mood swings. And so he could take care of you ?? 

It was an act of care, to keep track of your periods. Sometimes, he even knew before you when you were going to have it. 

People who thought it was weird to kept such a calendar, were the same people who thought periods were gross and a taboo subject. 

Sure, it was definitely not very glamorous. But it was part of half of the World’s population life ?? Why keep it taboo and refusing to talk about it ? 

Tim immediately, just like his dad, did a lot of research on women’s menstruations...Which got you to be called in his principal’s office once. 

The man was worried, and unhappy that your son was reading a magazine “for woman” about “menstruations”, he thought the topic was vulgar and inappropriate. 

Your son was 13. Which was also the age many of his girl friends were experiencing their first periods. And that principal was out there, scolding him because he talked about it, making an entire generation of little girls thinking they were wrong for having periods ? 

Needless to say, you got rather mad. And the principle never called you ever again (if he had to call, he was always making sure to get your husband on the line, and not you).

And so Tim kept learning everything possible about it, in the hope also to find the perfect remedies to ease your pain. He tried a lot, to help you out. Gave tricks to Bruce, too. 

And so, kept a calendar. 

This allowed him to know if something was wrong, as well. 

He was the first one to guess you were pregnant with Thomas, because of his calendar. And one time, you had hormonal problems and he’s the one that told you you should check an endocrinologist because you’d been too irregular with your periods time ! 

Yes. Just like his dad, Tim needed to know a situation fully before acting. And seeing him trying to know as much as he could in order to help you was...why, it was the most adorable thing in the world. 

Cass

Cass’ periods were not painful, and you were so glad for her. 

To her, it was a mild annoyance, there was no pain, it was just irritating. And yes, she had mood swings and could easily get mad, but it was nothing major. 

She never even knew other women could have it so bad...The education about periods was really lacking ! They never talked about it anywhere ! 

Cass was a woman of few words...but she knew how to pass her emotions through her body language. Oh, how she knew. 

“Momma.” 

Just like your other kids, she’d come check on you when Bruce couldn’t take care of you. You wanted space sometimes, which they all understood. But honestly, during your periods, when you were so sensitive about everything ? You also wanted them around almost all the time. 

A paradox. Very fitting of those damn periods time. 

Cass would just sit with you, and make sure you were comfortable. She wouldn’t say a word. Lay her head on your shoulder, and hold your hand. Watch movies with you. Hold you close. 

She was delicate with you, as if afraid to break you. 

Just like your husband, her presence had a soothing effect ? As if nothing bad could ever happen to you as long as she was there (and that probably was right, Cassandra would never let anyone touch her “momma”).

She didn’t need to talk. She didn’t need to do anything more than stay with you when you didn’t want to be alone. 

She never experienced the pain you had, but if even to her, who had painless periods, it was annoying and a damn plague ? Then to you... 

She didn’t need to do much. 

Just her being there already meant a lot. 

Her holding onto you, even as she stayed afraid of anyone’s touch for so long. 

“Momma.” 

Cassandra was your only daughter. And oh you were glad her periods weren’t as bad as yours. That’s all that really mattered to you. 

“Momma.” 

You often fell asleep with the warmth of your kiddo right there. Next to you. Knowing she wasn’t going to leave unless you wanted to. Knowing she wish she could take your pain on. 

Ah. But no. No even if it was possible you’d never allow that. You were the mom. YOU were supposed to take their pains on. 

And knowing that Cass never suffered on her periods as bad as you did, was enough. After all, your baby suffered enough in the past...She could get a little lucky, right ? 

“Momma.” 

That word was music to your hear. Cass’ first word to you. 

She didn’t need to talk anyway. Being here was enough...

It was more than enough. 

Damian 

Everyone who saw Damian around you would notice that he wasn’t quite the same boy than "normally”. 

He was calmer, nicer, and sweeter. 

You’d argue that it was his real self. That this was his “normal”. That he was just never allowed to show his true heart before, and wasn’t used to trust others and open up. And you were definitely more than happy that he finally managed to do that after arriving into your home. 

That none of you ever gave up on him. 

You especially had a calming effect on him. After all, he never had a “conventional” mom, who could take care of him when he was sick, kiss him good night and make sure he always had everything he needed. 

Some would say you coddled him too much...And you didn’t care. Because that boy lived 10 years being the opposite of coddled. So what, if you’d cut the crust off of his sandwiches, or read him bed time stories every single night ? 

Damian loved it. As he often said, being a momma’s boy was “hardly something he was ashamed of”. He never felt loved and safe before, you bet he’d take every chance he got to be cared for. 

He never got to act like an actual kid. You allowed him to do just that, AND you made him feel like he belonged. Finally. Like he had an actual family. 

So...The day he heard about your absolutely awful periods, what did he do ? 

Every single day of your life with him, you had at least one nice intention to him. Wether it was baking his favorite cookies, or telling him how proud you were of him, you always had nothing but kindness for him, often going out of your way for your son. 

It was normal for you. Of course. And you did it with all your children...but you had to admit maybe Damian had just a little more of it, because he really never had anything like that to him. 

And to him, it only felt normal then, when you felt at your worst, that he’d be there for you exactly like you were there for him. 

During any mood swings, he’d have comforting words for you. He had little attentions for you that just made life easier. 

Again, it would greatly surprise anyone but his family, but when you had your periods, he did a lot of overly sappy little things. 

Like for example : every month, he wrote seven things he found extraordinary about you and would put them in a jar. Seven. The number of day in a week. And usually the number of day, give or take, your periods would last. 

The jar would be sitting right on your bedside table on the first day, with the indications you had to read one paper every morning, or every time you felt down (it was supposed to be one paper a day). Sometimes, you’d go through his seven messages in less than a day...and magically, the next day, the jar would be filled again. 

Damian made sure of it. 

This was just a small example. But it showed exactly what kind of boy your son really was. 

If he was heartless, a killer, someone destined to destroy the World...would he really put that much effort into making you feel love ? Into making you feel better any way he could ? 

You didn’t think so. The only way your son could ever “turn bad”, was if you (and Bruce) stopped caring for him. Left him alone (A/N : this is a CLEAR jab at current comics canon, if you know what I mean :I ). Only if he felt abandoned, unloved, and rejected. 

You knew your boy had, just like you, “rejection dysphoria”. It was hard for him to accept any kind of rejection, and it made him act out and hurt. But that was another story... 

Right now, all that mattered to you, is that you knew your son was always going to be there for you, just like you’d always be there for him. 

That he finally learned how to love, and care. That he would never unlearn it, as long as you lived. 

Your periods sucked. 

So bad. 

But Damian was a ray of light in the darkness of those seven dreaded days...

Duke 

Duke’s mom also had endometriosis. 

Over the years, he perfected a “special remedy” he always made her when she had her periods. 

He hesitated to make it for you. After all, it was something that made him bond greatly with his own mom...was making it for you, now, acceptable ? Did it mean he forgot about his mother ? 

No. No of course not. 

Duke scolded himself for even thinking that. You too, became his mom. He learned over the years that it was ok, to have two mom. That when they’ll find a cure for his parents, it wouldn’t take away the years you filled in for the mother role, and took care of Duke as if he was your own. 

So here we go. 

Some ginger. Some lemon. A dash of his little secret ingredients. Your favorite blend of tea. And it was done. 

He brought it to you, saying it always soothed his mom...

And just that. 

Just those words. It meant so much. 

“It always used to soothe my mom. Used to do it all the time, ever since I was five !” 

He said with a smile. 

It was something he used to do for his mom, and now he did it for you. Just this. Just that fact, it was enough to make you feel better. 

It didn’t take away the pain, but mentally ? It felt amazing. 

You drunk his concoction and...Oh god. 

Oh god it was disgusting. And...Ah. Yes. His mom probably pretended she liked it. “Ever since I was five !”. Ha. So cute. But also, it really was gross. 

At the same time, you felt a pleasant warmth spread through your body as the terrible aftertaste slowly faded. Duke smiled to you, and with a little mischief in his voice said : 

“It’s really gross, isn’t it ? But it does the trick haha” 

There was a few seconds of silence. During which you blinked at him, not quite registering what he just said. Until... 

You burst out laughing. The little mischievous smile, and the way he said “it’s really gross, isn’t it ?” was just too funny. 

Your communicative laugh spread to Duke, and as he laughs it makes you laugh even louder too and...You forget. 

For a moment you forget about your periods. The pain. The anguish. The emotional labor. This damn week of hell. 

You forget.

And you just laugh. 

You laugh alongside your son. 

Thomas (if you wonder who the H is Thomas, you can check my “Batmom” masterlists, he appears from the story “the great mall adventure” ^^)

Thomas must’ve been about four, when he first saw you having your periods. 

Your littlest baby was also one of the most sensitive out of them all (right along with Jason, the two of them cried their eyes out when they watched “Inside Out” and Bing Bong disappeared). Bruce always said he took that after you. And honestly, you couldn’t disagree. It’s true you could be very sensitive. 

So one morning, when he woke up and went to breakfast and heard you weren’t feeling right, he immediately went to you and...

Bruce found him an hour later, crying in his room. 

“Oh wow hey hey, what is it buddy ?” 

He asked, trying to hide the panic in his voice. Thomas might’ve been sensitive, but he rarely cried. He was just a very empathetic boy. But also a cheerful one, and he had a knack to see the good even in the worst situations. 

So seeing him sob like that, made Bruce’s heart drop. 

“Is mommy going to die ?!” 

It took Bruce a few seconds to get a hold of his racing heart. His son crying. And asking if you were going to die. It shortcircuited his brain for a few seconds. Until he realized what Thomas was talking about...

“Oh, oh no champ, no, mommy isn’t going to die.” 

Your kids were used to see you strong and fierce. Of course the first time your little one would see you on your period, he’d think something big was wrong.

He had just recently learned what death really mean (you can read about this here : The day he understand what Death means), and since then was so scared it’d happen to his parents. Or his siblings. Or anyone he knew, really... 

Picking up his son and slowly and softly tapping his back in soothing circles, he walked around the room and rocked him until the boy calmed down a bit, before trying to explain as best he could why mommy felt bad, without going in in too many details. 

Once Thomas understood this was just like when he got a fever that time, that it would pass, he felt much better. But also worst. Because his mommy wasn’t feeling well ! And it happened often ! 

Bruce reassured him that there were ways they could help you...And soooo : 

Thomas brought you hot water bottles, with the help of his dad (the bottles were almost as big as him), and ended up falling asleep  on one as it laid on your belly (he heard that humans’ body heat was very strong and wanted to “help the hot water bottle”). 

The water in the bottle became cold, and you removed it..Your son didn’t woke up, so you laid him back down on your belly. And he was warm and so tiny, and you loved him so much...It made you feel like the luckiest woman in the world, to be surrounded by people like this little one. 

And all your kids. Alfred. Your friends. Broosh...You fell asleep with sweet dreams made of warmth and cuddles. 

Not long after, Bruce came by to check on you, finding both you and Tommy deeply asleep and...An overwhelming feeling of happiness took him over. 

You weren’t the only one feeling lucky. Except for Bruce...For Bruce it was even stronger, because after his parents died, he never thought he would be happy ever again. 

This was why he’d always be there for you. You gave him another family... 

His schedule was freed, and he had a busy day. A nap sounded perfect. Especially while nestled against you, with his little one right there. 

Dick came by in the afternoon, and found all of you like this. Bruce holding both you and his son, Thomas taking way more space than such a small body would make you thing he’d take. 

Dick snapped a picture, and send it to the group chat he had with his siblings and some other close friends and such (like Clark, Wally, Conner, Diana etc etc they used the group chat to gossip about Bruce, mainly). With the caption : “Big bad bat tamed by a four year old”. 

Cass send multiple hearteyes emojis. Jason said it was adorable and send a crying emoji, and didn’t care one bit what anyone would think of him saying such things. Damian yelled at Dick that he should’ve put the comforter back up on his baby brother and mom because it wasn’t properly put on !! Duke send a : “I’m downloading that picture for the next time he gets mad at us and we need to soften him up”. Tim replied with a gif of Maes Hughes from Full Metal Alchemist saying : “dis dad”. Clark said “they look so peaceful, you wouldn’t believe he threatened me just yesterday to punch me because I made a joke” to which Diana answered : “that joke was so bad I wanted to punch you to. Cute pic btw, give kisses to Tommy for me, you should come see me more, I just stocked my freezer with nothing but ice creams”..Everyone send a little comment about it. 

Because even superheroes, could have normal conversations about those they love. 

Suffering alone is a thing of the past

It’s funny. You couldn’t even remember, now, what it felt like “before”. 

Before. 

Before you met Bruce.

Before that first time he showed up to your apartment to take care of you. 

How were your periods before that ? The worst. 

Definitely. 

Actual Hell.

Not that they were feeling better now. Oh no. There were time your overdramatic self exclaimed : “uuuugh just kill me alreadyyyy” when the pain was too grand...But you weren’t alone anymore. 

That’s what made it a bearable moment of the month. 

It still felt as bad as it used to when you were younger. 

But it wasn’t just you agonizing in your bedroom all alone anymore. 

It wasn’t you wishing you’d have someone to take care of you, and to try and ease the pain. Not anymore. 

It wasn’t you crying with nobody to dry your tears anymore...

No. You had an entire army of people right there just for you. 

Alfred, your children, and most of all...Bruce. 

Your Broosh. 

Ah. If only some people could see this side of him you and your family knew. The caring and loving one. In a way though, it was rather comforting and made you feel special, that only you and your kiddos knew the real Bruce ? 

Of course  nowadays, some of his closest friends like Clark and Diana weren’t fooled anymore either. But they’d never see him the way you did, when you were in unbearable pain, and he was right there, drawing soothing circle on your back, keeping you warm and safe... 

This was only privy to you. 

Your Broosh. 

Yes. 

Your periods were still as painful as they used to. But now...

Now you weren’t alone anymore. 

The end. 

________________________________________________

Hey guys ! I hope you liked this :). As usual, feedbacks and reblogs are always welcomed ! (Especially lately, the reblog ratio seems at its worst haha). And again, I really hope you liked this. I was finally able to sit down and write after weeks of  being stuck in a depressed mood, so I’m quite excited about sharing this. But as usual, always a bit nervous that you’ll be disappointed blahblahblah low self-esteem and all that haha... :). I just hope this is to your liking. Thank you.  

[sarahwaraor]

Back when Turning Red was freshly released, majority love it as much as I do, and another part of majority too hate it (in which you know what they are) and that includes “hOw ImMoRaL aNd inApPrOpRiAtE fOr PoRtRYaiNg cHildRen tO hAvE fanTasiEs/hYpErFiXaTiOn/etc bla bla bla” I thought it was common. Normal even. :0

It just that you parents (including mine) don’t see behind our bedroom doors & we’re good at hiding our forbidden drawings (that is of course until I got discovered SOBS,,, I drew lots of women wearing bikinis doing sexy poses BUT still managed to hide the gays art👍🏻but I eventually getting around once I’m adult🤣). While I’m not fond of celebrities, I have LOTS of friends who are like Mei Mei, self-insert themselves with their fave celebrities! As for me, I’m like Mei Mei too in terms of favourite TV shows/video games/etc. and the characters in it.

Story time:

When I was 14 or 15, that’s when I first discovered BL for the first time ever, and AxlLumine was my first BL ship ever. Not in Megaman, but as in BL generally. I think I told the whole story at Twitter 😂 it was cringe childhood memories but in the same it makes me fondly remembered the first time ever, leads to where I am right now after like several years in embarrassment and denial. I finally embrace it and I get to enjoy Megaman X8 in peace (and also embarrassment of drawing not-safe-for-work since I live in conservatives country where erotic/sex/anything along the line with that is considered taboo. //COUGHyettheyokaywithportrayingr*peasgoodthingandcishetstuffinmultimediaorbookshuhCOUGH// Until I’m in early 20s I really started drawing erotic stuff slowly, and it feel liberating in every aspect, including discovering sexuality both orientation and sexual things since).👍🏻

To cut the story short:

We 14/15 years old don’t know what we actually doing but out of fun, I drew a short pron BL comic of AxlLumine and gave it to my classmate 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Just imagine it with my 14/15 years old badly drawn artstyle. She brought it home and showed her mother the comic😂😂😂 the next day, her mother approves my comic omg! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 what’s funnier is they kept it 😂😂😂 and then I moved to enter boarding school faraway after final national exam and we have lost contact since. I think they also moved out to another state. Present me now, while it’s a fond memory, I wish they destroy the evidence, hoping her father or my family didn’t find it 🤣🤣🤣 but in the same time, it’s okay 😂

It was a wild ride overall. And I even feel glad that one of my favourite storyboard artist Mewtripled talk about that too publicly! Glad I’m not alone! Here’s her video. //tho I’m unsure why I can’t paste the YouTube link into here, but go search it “mewtripled h*ntai sketchbook” if you’re interested! Her story when she was young were also wild 😆 she even started younger than me (I discovered h*ntai when I was 12).

We’re all Mei Mei overall! I dunno how did I draw AxlLumine when I was 14/15 but it probably look like that 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[nightmarewritings]

Been a while since I did one of these types of posts, but I've got a lot of lesser known movies I'd like to recommend, there's so many hidden gems out there! As always, please check content warnings before watching! Some of these can get pretty fucked up.

Lesser Known Horror Recommendations Part 1

Cabin By The Lake(2000)- A made for TV movie starring Judd Nelson, but don’t let that fool you, this is surprisingly dark, but still fun! A scriptwriter begins murdering women for research on his latest work, by drowning them in a twisted underwater garden. Can be found on: Youtube Slaughter Studios (2002)- Cheesy on purpose, this is a slasher movie involving a group of college film students secretly shooting in an abandoned film studio that’s due to be torn down the next day, while getting picked off one by one. Nothing special, but still a good time. Can be found on: Tubi The Last Horror Movie(2003)- Though the death of rental stores leaves this a bit toothless, it’s still a dark and meta look into the workings of a serial killer/wedding photographer, who is very aware you’re watching the tape. Can be found on: Youtube Skinned Deep (2004)- Honestly I hated this movie but it’s just SO batshit bonkers that I NEED to recommend it. Imagine Texas Chainsaw Massacre but warped all to hell, there’s plate throwing, elderly bikers, a giant brain, and that’s just scratching the surface of what’s in this. Can be found on: Tubi Alone With Her (2006)- A dark movie about a (kinda cute, but I’m a sucker for pathetic men in glasses) loser who secretly sets up cameras in the home of the woman he’s stalking. It’s a tense, brutal, kinda depressing found footage horror but I love it. Can be found on: Nowhere Free Currently :( Joshua (2006)- This movie is ridiculously hard to find, you might need to buy a copy, but it’s SO good. It’s a very low budget movie about a man returning to his hometown after the death of his father, and confronting something dark he and his friends did when they were children. Can be found on: Nowhere Free Currently :( Midnight Movie (2008)- A group of people at a theater showing a slasher movie directed by a serial killer find the slasher has left the movie and is picking them off in the theater. Not very unique but it’s fun and the killer has such a cool mask! Can be found on: Nowhere Free Currently :( Spaceship Terror(2011)- Low budget torture/slasher flick set IN SPAAACE! A group fights for their lives to escape a spaceship run by a dangerous and sadistic captain. Very inventive, even if it falls short in some places. Can be found on: tubi And as always, you can find more of my recommendations here!

[olderthannetfic]

Ohhhhh. Yeah, okay. Thrift stores around here consist of multiple chains that are fucking everywhere and that overflow with our collective bad buying habits. The non-chains tend to be... like... a queer charity where the emphasis is on donating good stuff to them so they can make money for whatever social programs they run. The aim of many of these places, including the chains, is often to provide employment to certain classes of people or to put the profits towards some good cause or to keep clothing out of landfills as much as it is to provide cheap goods to people who need cheap goods. That’s certainly a thing they do, but it’s not the only or even primary purpose.

I think the specific “don’t buy plus size clothes” thing is actually not super widespread but is instead wank about highly specific influencer types. In fact, a lot of it is one specific wank I vaguely recall. It’s the people making galling posts about their hauls and “upcycling” in hideous ways that tend to draw fire, not some rando who bought a few things that were a few sizes too large and then took them in at the waist. It’s the combo of buying a lot, bragging about it, and telling followers to do the same that annoys people so much. The fear is that this will make a bunch of new people pick the stores clean in a way they wouldn’t if they were just doing their normal shopping to replenish their wardrobe.

TBH, as someone who has always shopped heavily at thrift stores because I hate what’s on shelves now, the amount of actually good clothing in the very high ranges is basically zero. If you need those sizes, you’re pretty fucked regardless. There are whole charities around here devoted to providing interview clothing for plus size low income women because it’s that much of a problem.

This is a direct consequence of what’s manufactured and how it’s marketed (at least in the US). My ex was pretty big and liked good clothes. She shopped entirely at those high quality plus size-only online places, and if she was done with something before it was full of holes, she resold it for 80% of sticker price to another fan of the same brands who was hooked into the Facebook resale community. In that world, there’s no such thing as cheap, and nothing ends up at the thrift store.

Based on both shopping experience and seeing what people are holding up in youtube videos, your typical sweater that people are buying to unravel is probably a size large. It might be a long cardigan so there’s plenty of yarn, but the armpit area is not generous. These sweaters aren’t in short supply, nor do they fit people who have trouble finding clothing.

Another difference is that yarn is flexible. X feet of yarn can be made into almost anything. Not so with woven cloth in clothing: what you’re looking for when thrifting is large, uninterrupted pieces. A plus size knitter can absolutely reuse a long-but-tight cardigan’s-worth of yarn to make a plus size sweater. They cannot take the itty bitty scraps of cloth from a size small dress and do much of anything productive with them unless they prefer a patchwork look.

I’m not going to pitch a fit if somebody else does buy the occasional XXXL dress to modify, but yeah, I do think it’s a bit mean to take really quality pieces that are rare and chop them up as though they’re raw fabric. It’s just that that isn’t what’s happening in most cases.

The stuff I would personally tend to leave alone at the thrift shop is stuff above a Large that is like nice business suits, good quality blouses that could go with said suits, fitted dresses out of high quality material that can hold structure, etc. In essence, anything that could be described as “tailored” and that’s not 100% synthetic.

What’s actually at most places I shop in the sizes above L is polyester sack-like horrors, low-quality cotton t-shirts, and stretchy leggings.

But even so, this is more my personal rule. If someone is good enough at sewing to convert a great suit between sizes and they actually need a suit, I don’t think it’s any of my business. The people who deservedly get called out are the ones depleting the good shit for weekly upcycling projects that mostly exist to generate tiktok views.

tl;dr - There’s an issue here, but it’s complex, and it doesn’t really apply to yarn.

I've taken up knitting again! But most of what I've got in my old stash is just the Red Heart stuff I never used before. What are some brands or types of yarn you'd recomend that are a decent balance of price and quality?

--

I usually buy used so I can get snobby yarn at a price I'm willing to pay. So not only are they not economical brands, but a lot of what I'm actually using is long discontinued.

What kinds of yarns do you like? Fiber content? Solid color vs. heathered vs. speckled vs. striped, etc.?

What kinds of projects do you want to do?

--

My personal favorite brand I've worked with lately is Swans Island. They have a bunch of different yarns that are just a delight on the hands. Prices are... well... not the highest I've seen? But that's about the best I can say.

[thotbugatti]

A Love Letter to Twitter

This is going to sound really stupid but I’m prepared for that. Are you? I have been on twitter in many forms since the beginning of 2014. That’s almost 9 years. Over that time, I have made countless connections, discovered unbelievable content creators and comedians; learned a lot about the world and myself. Because of twitter, I’ve been able to become the person I am now.

At the beginning of the pandemic, I, along with probably many other people, really struggled with my sense of gender identity as well as sexuality. I wasn’t going to school, wasn’t going to work; I was stuck in isolation with nothing but drowning thoughts of who and what I might be. At first, I thought I was non binary. That didn’t fit. Could I have been trans? Yes, actually, that’s exactly what it was. Suddenly, my world opened up even more. I was finding trans people on YouTube first, then I discovered an intricate community of other trans women on Twitter. Connecting my experiences with them and realizing more and more that many of the things they experienced were also things I experienced with or struggled with, that really did something for me. Suddenly, I didn’t feel so alone. All thanks to twitter.

On one hand, it might seem so silly to be upset about the loss of something so trivial as twitter, yet I am. Many others probably are as well but don’t want to admit that. I do. When you lose something that has been part of your life for so long, you’re bound to. If it does indeed die, I am going to miss it so much. I’m going to miss the people tho, not the platform itself. For all intents and purposes, twitter is a house of popsicle sticks held together by rubber bands and stick glue. I think had Elon Musk never even stuck his toes into purchasing twitter, we might have it for many years to come. But he did, and here we are. I’m going to miss the people. I love so dearly being able to connect with others from all over the world in a way that doesn’t feel so unbelievably one sided. With something like TikTok or Instagram, something that isn’t almost entirely text based, it feels as though you’re not interacting with a person. It feels more as if you’re interacting with the vision of a person. It’s worse with YouTube and TikTok, where there are, more than likely, billions of hours of videos that you end up just endlessly watching and scrolling past. Even with tumblr, while I am having fun with it, I feel it’s so hard to find exactly what I want to see, to find the people who I want to follow. I’m not sure how it is on the webpage, but the for you tab on this app just doesn’t seem to work. Things that were there last week still permeate at the very top. I want to be able to scroll, I want to be able to read what people are saying, I want to be able to find the most up to date news. I feel that that is a very uniquely twitter experience, and we’ll likely never see anything like it again. That’s very sad to me.

Transness is a very isolating and lonely experience. You might run across a trans person in real life, but it’s not a common thing. Even if you did, how likely are you to actually talk to them? Ultimately, you probably end up walking right past each other, maybe sharing a glance or a small smile, but nothing more. You’ll probably never see them again. This is my experience living in a very rural area. My high school had one trans person (not including myself because I didn’t know at the time). I often think about her, wondering how she managed to do it. If you live in a city like Chicago, New York, LA, San Francisco, wherever, you’ll come across more trans people to be sure. If you’re still in college, same situation. For many of us who aren’t in school anymore or live in the middle of nowhere, we aren’t very common. Twitter. Twitter opens up that world for many of us (or tumblr idk ymmv).

There’s part of me that still believes that twitter won’t die. Elon Musk will sell it off before he crashes and burns because, at the end of the day, he cares more about his money and his ego than he does anything else. There’s another part of me that is standing on the deck of the twitter ship, watching the iceberg grow ever closer. It’s sad, and it’s scary. Maybe it’ll be a good thing, but I can’t help but wonder what could come from the downfall. Maybe I’ll be able to actually get some work done. Maybe there will be less relative negativity in the world. Or maybe more anti trans and anti lgbt legislature will silently pass, with nothing around for people to bring light to the bigotry that blights this country.

So, Twitter if you do hit that iceberg, if you do sink, it’s been an honor. If it doesn’t however, I’m going to look like a big goober for spending over half an hour of my time writing a big long post about it while sitting on the floor at work. 🖤

[imaginewarehouse]

Various Males x Fem!ExModel!Reader || Oneshot

Plot: You, a retired model get hired at Cloud 9 and, not-at-all-surprisingly, you get harassed by every allegeable (According to them) bachelor in the place- but god fucking damnit! You’re just here to get a paycheck??!  

“You can’t knock ‘em out, you cant walk away,

Try desperately to think about the politest way to say,

“Just get out of my face,”, “Just leave me alone,”

“And no you cant have my number,”,

“Why?”

“Cuz I lost my phone.”

(Inspired by Lily Allen’s Knock ‘Em Out)

Includes (In order of appearance after the introduction bit): Sal Kazlauskas, Garret McNeil, Tate Staskiewicz, Isaac (And I think my favouritism here definitely bleeds through*Cough*), Elias Greene, Cory, Jonah Simms, and Marcus White.

Warnings: Sal, harassment (They leave after you say no though. Just to be sure) 

🔆  🔆  🔆

“And uh, yeah one last thing before we all hop off to work! We have a new Cloud 9 family member. Y/N! Would you like to stand up?” Glenn, the lovely man who took your interview a week ago and then went out of his way today to look for you out front in the morning to show you around quickly and guide you through clocking in, finds you in the crowd of workers and gestures for you to stand.

Oh, uh- uhh, okay! Up we get, then, you think as you stand up like he said and take a look around at all the judging eyes, which normally wouldn’t phase you but here is a lot scarier than what you’re used to. This an entirely different environment to getting up at a modelling gig- you know nothing about working this kind of job! You’ve never done it, so, you’re afraid they’ll judge you right off the bat and make it difficult for you to ask questions. And you can’t keep bothering Glenn- he has more important things to do.

Oh god, you hear whispering. You peer around. Where is that coming from?-

“This is Y/N L/N! She’ll be working with Go back’s today,” Right, Go Back’s Easy enough; Glenn explained them earlier before the meeting started. “So if you see her in your area- be sure to say hello and see if she needs some help, K? Good. We’re jazzed to have you with us Y/N.”

“Thank you!” You quip quickly, then sit down and focus on Glenn again, hoping dearly at the same time that attention disperses from you immediately.

Glenn smiles, glancing down at his clipboard for any last-minute messages. “Okay! I think that’s it, so- “

The whispering from before suddenly cuts off. “Uh yeah, question?” Glenn stops short when a man in the back kind of rudely cuts him off, but sighs out a ‘Yes, Marcus?’ as the woman beside him - Dina, - rolls her eyes severely. Oh, you let a tiny ghost of a smirk slip over your lips. That’s kind of a reaction, isn’t it? “Yo- new girl.” What- me- w h y- You immediately get awkward again and twist around in your chair, but don’t really know who to look at. Luckily the tall brunette in the warehouse uniform is pointing, so you figure it out pretty quick that that’s who you’re looking for, and calm down. Mostly. 

Yeah? You raise one eyebrow. “Hi?”

He grins back to the right and the left of him, to his equally pleased buddies and pals, before raising a Vogue magazine- and it’s the issue on which you scored the front page. Jeez, that was months ago! “Is this you?”

A chorus of ‘Ohhhhh’ and general excitement travels around the room and for the first time ever, you’re half ashamed to admit that yes that is you. In your usual circle this is something to be proud of… but you get that it isn’t really like that, in non-modelling circles. In fact, it could be something to be embarrassed about.

Especially seeing that oh dude and his gang of Michael Myers fashion wannabes look like a hungry, dim-witted, wolves rather than plainly interested about your modelling career.

But, still, you smile politely and nod. Hopefully it’ll be forgotten before the afternoon, at least. “Yeah, that’s me.”

“Nice.”

Hmm… you really, really hope that it’s forgotten soon, at least, as you turn back around to face the front again as Glenn sends everyone off to work. Because if not, then these boys are going to learn the hard way that models take self-defence classes religiously.

Or at least you are going to have a very uncomfortable day, which is just great. You groan inwardly at the thought, as you gather up your coffee from the table beside you and drop it in the trash can on the way out.

~

You’re just doing your own thing and someone

Comes out of the blue,

They’re like,

“Alright”

But he’s saying

“Yeah can I take your digits?”

And you’re like, “No, not in a million years, you’re nasty.

Please leave me alone.”

There’s already so many Go Back’s! You think excitedly, as you get to work looking for where things should be. You’re glad to have something to do- at your first job with Chuck E Cheese, before you got into the modelling thing, you were basically useless the first day because you weren’t allowed to grill yet, you didn’t know how to assemble, and they didn’t want you out on the floor for the birthday party that was happening, in fear that you would mess up royally. So you just sat around trying not bother anyone, and that felt terrible. So, wandering the aisles of Cloud 9 with a full shopping trolley searching for products and neatening things up? Sounds like a good deal to you. Yes please.

“Uhh, hi.”

You practically jump entirely out of your skin, hearing the voice right beside you and whip your head around to see a balding guy in a blue Cloud 9 jacket. Is this man licking his fingers!?

“Uh,” You step back with your brightest, most polite smile, picking something up from the Go Back’s cart and rounding it to put it between you and the man, before acting like you’re stupid enough to be putting barbecue sauce in the Barbie section, and then… “Oh, oops! Silly me!” You flash the guy a nervous look. “I’m still working things out… “

Well? Better to look like an absolute idiot, then be standing within grabbing radius of the creepy man licking his fingers that you’re all alone in the middle of an empty aisle with. “Um… so, what’s up? Did someone send you to find me, or… am I doing something wrong? You know better than me, after all!”

“No… “His gaze licks up your form and if it weren’t for all your ‘training’ in staying still and not feeling this kind of thing- you absolutely would have wigged out. “You’re doing fine… Just wanted to see you.”

Boy- if anyone else could see your face right at this moment, full of disgust and mild horror, you’re sure you would be YouTubes next hit. Or a meme. “Oh… “You nervously chuckle. “Um, well, I’m gonna… go… “You pull the trolley around so that you can back up out the back of the aisle and escape through stuffed toys, into the open but his hand comes down on the other end of the trolley- stopping it. Before you can stop yourself, verbal diarrhoea spews from your lips. “Glenn has my resume- there’s a photo on there you can have.”

“That’s okay I prefer them to be breathing.” Both his hands are on the end of your trolley now, tight so his knuckles turn white, and he’s breathing unnecessarily heavy. He’s even leaning over the trolley some like his body really can’t handle whatever terrible heat is plaguing it right now. Oh god, oh god oh god oh god… this is so gross.

“Well, that’s… u-understandable...”

He looks up into your eyes, now, and doesn’t blink. Who the hell is this guy?! “Say… “ Oh no, oh no- he’s coming around the trolley-he’s coming around-he’s close-too close-too close-mayday-MAYDAY- Slowly, in your face, he licks up his thumb, makes an ‘Mm,’ sound, and you deeply wince; So much so in fact that one of your eyes completely closes. “Could I take your phone number?”

You absolutely couldn’t have helped what happened next if you had wanted to.

“Eeeeuuuwwwwwwww no not in a million years, your nasty, please leave me alone!!” You exclaim in a high voice before abandoning the trolley and rushing off to customer service.

~

“No you cant have my number,”

“Why?”

“Cuz I lost my phone.”

By the time you got to the front desk, you had basically calmed down and were mostly just stressed that you left the Go Back’s behind- but still must look troubled as the guy manning the front desk makes a confused, half-concerned but mostly intrigued kind of face at you as you stop there. You’re about to explain your appearance - that or just shrug, not too bothered about reporting whatever mess that was. Not on your first day, at least. No way. - when his face relaxes, and he nods. “Ohhh. Damn, Sal got to you?”

Sal? Was that the guy’s name? You didn’t check. “Oh, was that his name? I was a bit too preoccupied by his eyeballs sucking out my soul, to notice his name tag.” Now that you’re thinking about it, though, you glance at this man’s name tag. Garret.

“Yep, that’s Sal. That’s just one of the wonderful things involved in working here that you’ll just have to get used to.” Garret grins, offering you a chill perspective with a side of cynicism. You sigh, truly feeling relieved that you’ve found a normal person and relax your back against the taller part of the desk.

“Brilliant.” The sarcasm drips off the tip of your tongue.

“You’ll have to deal with a lotta that here, though, looking like you do.” You turn your head to the side to look already exhausted just by the idea, at him. He shrugs. “Hey, I don’t make the rules. I just speak the truth.”

“God- I feel sorry for the other women working here.”

“Oh, no. They’re in a completely different wheelhouse to you. Sorry.” Garret leans on his forearms on the desk, and you roll over to lean on your shoulder and pay attention. “See, you’re a model- “

“I was a model,”

“You were a model- which through primitive male thought process makes you prime real estate. Whoever manages to ‘bag’ you, for lack of a better word I apologise, gets some serious bragging rights.” He shrugs, and looks vaguely apologetic but still some how shameless as this utter bullshit slips out of his mouth. “We can’t help it- some of us don’t even know we’re doing that, but we are. Actually, I’m probably the only one who’ll admit it… which… kinda makes me your best option. Self-awareness, and all that.”

Oh. A dry laugh comes out of you as you feel a text come through in your back pocket and pull out your phone. As you see that its not an urgent message, you immediately put the phone back and glance around for any supervisors before returning to your conversation with Garret. “Oh- of course it does.”

“Exactly!” He grins, and you can’t tell through his expression at all whether he’s genuinely this clueless or if he’s just shooting his shot. “So- “

“No, you can’t have my number.”

“Why?”

Deadass, in a very monotone voice, you say: “I lost my phone.”

Then the two of you just have a stare off for a minute. Garret because he just saw you use your phone, and you because you wont back down.

~

“Oh yeah, actually yeah I’m, I’m pregnant. I’m having a baby in like 6 months, so no. Yeah, yeah… “

“You know,” The chemist pipes up from behind the Pharmacy desk as you put back some pill boxes he said were fine to return to the shelves, and you glance over at him to show you’re listening, and check his name tag. “I myself considered a career in modelling, before this. People even say, now, that I could model.”

Oh boy. You think, fighting not roll your eyes. And how old are you? Early 30’s? I don’t think so buddy.

“Oh, well, I wouldn’t recommend it.” You flash him a nervous grin before returning to your shelving. “You’re good for, like, 3 years. But then you hit 22 and unless you look like Victoria Justice shared with you whatever youth fountain she got chucked into, then you have to find something else to do with your life- despite having nothing to fall back on.” Okay… so… I might be a bit bitter.

Tate chuckles - and oh boy, he sounds just like your old manager. Totally fake, -, hiding his hands in his lab coat pockets. “Yeah, you’re probably right… Besides, I got the better end of the deal, anyway. Doctor for the doctors, they call us.” They call Pharmacists that? Who? That’s news to you. “Ahhh, yeah… I’m doing pretty well for myself.”

“Yep.” Forcing a fake smile his way, you leave the shelf you were stocking and get closer to the desk to stock another, as Tate’s eyes follow you waiting for encouragement of some kind. Doesn’t he have a job to do?? “You chose well!”

“Yeah, thanks. I know.” Ffffff-f a r out. This guy! “You know, you and me, we’d make a good couple.”

Oh? Dear god? You pause your shelving in surprise at the bomb this man has just dropped so casually, fish oil tablets paused on their journey to the shelf mid-air. Could Garret’s crazy-pants theory have been right?

“Ohh,” You giggle nervously, returning to work a bit faster now. “I don’t know. I think for a pharmacist like you, I would envision, like… “An actual doctor? No, I can’t say that. “A personal trainer, or something. Keep you both healthy all-round, you know? Now that’s a power team.” As long as that personal trainer has humility enough for the both of them, at least.

“Mergh,” He makes a face, like ‘What the heck are you talking about??’, before shaking his head of the things you just said and leaning over the desk towards you. You keep packing, even faster now. Like the Flash. Go! Go! Go! Death Con 5!! “So, whadaya say? I could pick you up Friday after work, and we could head up to one of my timeshares?” He says that like it’s such a selling point! You think, fighting off the powerful urge to laugh but still feeling the panic deep in the pits of your soul. “Stake it out together for the weekend? Get to know each other?”

“Uhh… “Excuses! What are they? You slowly stop stocking, turning around to face him and crossing your arms. The man deserves to at least be faced as he’s rejected; You’re kind enough to give him that, at least. “I’d love to! But, the thing is… “Chewing your bottom lip, you think hard.

Ding Ding Ding!!

“The thing is, Tate… “You fake some nerves, now. “I’m actually, uh… “You look up, face relaxing. “Pregnant.”

Oh boy, the way that man recoils at that word, like a terrified, disgruntled, blonde hedgehog. You’re going to laugh so hard about it, later!! “Oh.”

“Yeah! Oh, I mean, yeah… I’m gonna be having a baby, in like, 6 months so… yeah… Yep.“ You shrug to him, as if its just so unfortunate. “Shame.”

~

She looks in her bag, takes out a fag, tries to get away from the guy on a blag,

Can’t find a light.

‘’Here, use mine.’’

‘’See the thing is I just don’t have the time.’’

Ahh, lunch. Now you can check your texts! Hmm, you look through your notifications and gradually lose excitement. Mum… mum… mum… phone bill company… friend… mum again…

Ah, the glamorous life of the famous.

You roll your eyes, and get to responding to your mothers texts about dinner and when you’ll be home and how your first day is going, not noticing the not-so-jolly, not-so-green-(unless-you-meant-pot) giant approaching you. When you finally finish responding to both your mum and your friend, you put your phone away and start unwrapping your lunch- a typical ham sandwich that you’re actually pretty excited about. That’s one good thing about your sudden drop in financial status; You can put in your damn sandwich as many pieces of ham and cheese as you like. Grinning excitedly, you pick it up and have it halfway to your mouth before another person - a very heavy, large person, - drops down beside you on the bench you’ve commandeered behind the store. You close your mouth without any delicious lunch inside it and look up, politely to the person who’s joined you.

And all you can think, is wow.

He could put you in a suitcase and walk off with you right now and have no problems.

That’s wow.

“Hi! I’m Y/N,” You introduce yourself, offering a hand for him to shake.

“I know.” Oh, well yeah okay that’s understandable. Glenn did introduce you to everyone this morning. Despite the man’s less-then-excited response, he takes your hand in his and shakes. It makes you all giddy inside, honestly. So b i g. “Names Isaac.”

Do you remember Isaac in the breakroom this morning? You wrack your brain for him, because surely if he was there you noticed him-

Oh. Yep, you remember him. He was one of that Marcus-Dude’s pals chuckling and whispering behind him. He was one of the men that had the magazine with you on the front, and if there’s one thing you know about men who carry Vogue in their locker’s it’s that they fit into only 2 groups- interested in fashion, obviously… and interested in the women. And this man clearly is not interested in fashion. Immediately, on this realisation, you feel disappointed- you really could have liked this man right off the bat…

But it looks like he’s just going to be another of the men at this store you have to get to know, before becoming friendly with.

“So,” He starts, and you fight off a wince. Hopefully, you don’t know what’s coming. But… the likeliness of that is not high. “You wanna go out, some time? I’m a big fan of your work.” He smirks.

“Oh, ha ha.” You laugh sarcastically, shaking your head and returning to your sandwich. You take a bite and- Ahhhhhh, so worth the wait. Oh my god. Food orgasm. “At least you’re honest!”

“Yeah, so is that a yes?” His face brightens a smidgeon, which is a lot seeing as he doesn’t seem to be totally all there, in the first place.

You look up at Isaac, and look apologetic. He was honest with you so its only fair that you’re genuine with him. “Sorry… “

“Ah- actually, I don’t know if this’ll change your mind, but I have 2 weeks to live, so… “

Never mind on that honesty thing, then.

Dull-eyed, you stare up at him. “… Uh-huh.”

“Its true! I have, uh, cancer.” He insists, nodding his head and forcing his eyebrows up his forehead all serious-like.

“Cancer.” Right.

“Yep.”

Right, time to look in the bag... You start to wrap up your lunch again - sadly, as now you’ll have to wait until the end of the day and the bus ride home to eat it, - and plop it back away in your bag, getting up and pulling out a cigarette instead- that should hold you over until the end of the day. “My lunch break is actually over, so I should go- Damn, where’s my light?“

Isaac rifles through his pockets until he pulls out an old looking neon orange lighter, and offers it to you. “Here, use mine.”

Oh, no. You stare at it like a deer in headlights. If you accept that, like you really want to right now because it’s been a month since your last smoke, then you have obligations to sit with him for another couple minutes, at least.

Aghh… You groan and whine on the inside, before making up your mind and flinging the cigarette into a puddle. “See the thing is, I don’t actually have the time-”

~

“Go away now, let me go.”

“Are you stupid? Or just a little slow?”

“Ughhh… “This one has been giving you looks all day, but had no courage until now to speak to you- but the thing is? He didn’t have the smarts, either, to take off his wedding ring at least before he decided to be a bastard and bother you. So you feel absolutely no regret about being exactly as dismissive or plain rude, as you feel. “Elias? Go away now.”

The nervous man, who’s been ringing his hands this whole time and stuttering through failed date requests that you pretended you didn’t understand because of his struggle, gets panicked. “Just let me ask!- Will, will you go out with me?”

“No.” You yawn, dropping a piglet toy into a basket.

“But!- “

Turning away, you start pushing your trolley along to get to the next aisle. “Let me go.”

“We can go wherever you like!”

Sighhhhhhhhh. You turn around and grant him an audience, putting your hands on your hips and raising you brows at the wedding band on his left hand.

“Are you stupid? Or just a little slow?”

~

“Please fuck off.”

Oh good god in heaven, they’re going bigger with their proposals.

“Y/N! Will you go out with me?”

This man, Corey, has grabbed the announcement phone now that you’re walking away, making you freeze like the dad possum in Over The hedge and seriously consider playing dead, too, as you slowly turn around to look at him again.

Oh, if only looks could kill- he would be so dead that even Vlad the Impaler’s victims would laugh.

This is your first day, and the fact that you’re being harassed by multiple stupid men is bad enough but now he’s calling attention to you like this? Glenn’s going to think you’re a troublemaker!! Jesus fucking Christ- you need this job! Corey continues to talk into the speaker phone, even as he looks into your eyes and sees his death.  “And… now… you’re looking at me like that, so uh… I’m just gonna… say please?”

… “’Please’ fuck off.”

“Yes ma’am-“  

~

“Go away now, I’ve made myself clear.

I don’t think so.

Nah its not gonna happen.

Not in a million years.”

Since the run-in with Corey and the following spike in your blood pressure, you’ve calmed down again. But now you’re looking into the two faces of a ‘Mateo’, who you apparently work with, and a ‘Castor’ who does not work here and is not shopping but is still in your face and is t h i s close to feeding that ugly tie to his cousin.

But, still, you’re going to stay graceful, because Castor constantly looks like he’s 3 seconds from pooing himself. “Now please go away, now… I think I’ve made myself clear.” By explaining, politely, that you aren’t looking for a man but thank you for the offer, Castor.

“Oh, but you haven’t heard what Castor does for a living! He’s in insurance,” Mateo explains to you, like this is some huge game changer. When you don’t react, he adds that there’s good money, insurance.

You almost laugh. Does this boy really think you’re such a gold digger? Boy- if I wanted riches then I could’ve easily become a C-Class actor who has no skills in the area, but is pretty so gets praised like she does- like a lotta my model friends.

Instead I’m here, at Cloud 9.

Come to your own conclusions.

But instead of saying that, though, you just shake your head nervously. “I don’t think so… “

“But!- “

“Nah… sorry, its… not gonna happen… “

“But Castor is- “

“Not in a million years… “

~

“Aw, no. I gotta go. My house is on fire.”

Now, at least this one is respectful, you think, listening to him talk about the products you’re shelving together. He had come over and offered to give you a hand when you looked confused, as a ‘Cheyanne’ had handed you a scanner earlier and then promptly ran off, despite your utter incompetence. You were so relieved that this guy turned up!!

“… so, you just punch in reduce .50, and scan! Its pretty easy, if you have it properly explained to you. I- I was actually in the same situation, as you! When I first started here, except I ended up, uh, reducing all the items in electronics to 15 cense rather than discounting it all 15 percent.” A grin spreads across your lips at the story, and thank god that Jonah had turned up before that happened to you and, with your luck, you got fired for it.

“Oh no!”

“Yeah- Amy, our uh, floor supervisor, was pretty cranky with me about that… “He laughs himself, resting his hands on his hips; Still looking nervous at the memory.

You look back down at the scanner you’re holding and shake your head. “Well at least you know, now! And thank you so much for coming to my aid, haha. I was so lost- you’ve been a huge help! A life saver, truly.”

“Yeah… “ He gives a cute little, reserved smile. “So, uh, its basically the end of the day! Hope you’re first day hasn’t been too strenuous. At the end of my first day, I know I was tired. But I got to go out with a couple of the other employees and have a drink, to destress. If-If you were free, we could… do something. Together.” Your eyebrows slowly raise up your forehead at that, and you turn to look up Jonah, sceptical. What was that? You sure have had a long day, and its about to get a lot longer if this boy is asking what you think he is. “Sorry! Sorry, that sounded weird. Um, I guess what I’m really asking, is… would you like to, I dunno, go out with me sometime? I know some great places.”

Oh, noooooo! You cry, on the inside. You thought you found a normal one!

Still, he is being so nice… The least you could do is let him down easily.

“Oh, Jonah, I actually… oh- sorry.” Your phone beeps in your pocket and you take it out quickly to have a glance - its just your mother… again, - … and suddenly get an idea. Feigning shock, you quickly put the phone away and put down the scanner. It’s time to clock out and go home, anyway, thank god. “I have to go! That was my mum, uh- I really have to go!”

“Wow, wow, wow, what’s wrong?? Can I help with anything?”

Oh… he looks so concerned. He’s sweet.

But before you can rethink your words, this living horror slips out. “My-my house is on fire.”

Oh god, you’re a horrible person.

~

“I’ve, I’ve got herpes. No- Syphilis!”

Oh thank god the day is over. Rolling your shoulders back, you kneel down at your bottom locker, open it up and take out your bag. Now you can go home and put on Gotham on Netflix, wear no pants and eat thin mints until you fall asleep.

When you get up, you aren’t watching out for a man to be standing barely half a foot away from you - Your mistake, obviously, - so you jolt right out of your skin when you see him and curse. What is wrong with these men? Does Cloud 9 offer complimentary staff ninja classes along with their lack of health insurance? Man, classy company. “Sorry!” You look up past the coveralls after stepping a safe distance back from him, and immediately feel dread deep in your chest. “Oh, hi. Marcus, was it?”

“That’s me! How was your first day?” He asks, seeming polite enough despite the fact that you’re cornered between tall boy and the lockers. And you’re too tired to try and slip away- this boy will get out of your way.

“It was good! Thanks for asking. I’m ready to go home and collapse, though.” You admit, shoulders dropping and a tired smile on your lips. Mmm… thin mints… bed… blankets… Cory Michael Smith… I can taste it… Marcus just needs to get out of my way.

“I hear that.” Evidently not quite as deeply, though, as he moves on pretty fast. “Listen- I was thinking if you’re into it we could… go out, some time.” He tilts his head forward to clarify, “On a date,”, in case that part hadn’t translated, and chuckles. “We could see a movie or get drinks, or something, I don’t know. How about tonight?”

T-tonight? The word nearly slips from your lips; All disbelief and tears and exhaustion, included. You’re so tired. “Um… you know, tempting offer, but um… “He looks so hopeful. It nearly changes your mind. “Not tonight.”

“OH! So like, tomorrow?” Oh christ- “Cuz I’m supposed to watch Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here with my mum, but… no, I can blow that off! So, tomorrow?”

You take a deep breath, not really knowing what you can say. “Marcus… “He raises his eyebrows, waiting for an answer. “… I have herpes.”

“Wait, what??” He steps back, nearly tripping over a table in his fear that just being near you will cause him to contract the disease, and you let your guard down in relief. Yep, for sure, definitely. If it makes him back off, then yes- you have herpes. You have a raging, festering case of herpes.

“Yeah! Or-“ Squinting, you pretend to sift through your brain. “Was it Syphilis?” This boys eyes basically bulge out of his head and you’re totally going to laugh about it later, but right now you have to get out of there. You waive your hand dismissively and walk on by him towards the door like you don’t have a care in the world. Before you leave though, you turn around a flash Marcus a big smile. “Either way, ew, right? Well, see you tomorrow buddy! Gotta go! Enjoy I’m A Celebrity with your mum.” Then you’re gone.

Tomorrow is going to be a much better day, once that rumour is properly spread.

[meaty4spicedbuns]

Headcanon SNK [Modern AU] - What you could find them listening in they playlist.

🌻Disclaimer before reading:🌻

Since I’m in those last chapters in the manga (I’m too nostalgic to finish it), they are all blocked to they last appearance (mostly they 20’s). Since it’s about music of those day, it’s a modern AU; basically, Eldia but in 2021! Everyone is friends, nobody died (because I’m still denying some) and this AU is just for fun,,,

✨This post engage MY opinion, and only MINE.✨

Author note : Little reminder that english isn't my first langage, so this post might contain some (if not, a lot) of mistake (syntax & grammar). I hope it won' bother the reading. And I love writing and sharing about music so I'll write more headcanon like that I think.

Starring : Erwin Smith, Miche Zacharias, Jean Kirstein & Hange Zoe

Those to come (that I'm still writting) : Armin Arlet, Kenny Ackerman, Levi Ackerman, Reiner Braun, Annie Leonhart, Eren Yeager and (MAYBE) Mikasa Ackerman.

You’re in your bedroom, listening some song. Usually when it’s about your music’s tastes, you’re into a little of everything and can switch from the newest song to some older one. But those days, even though your taste include a large variety of music, you’re getting more and more bored of your own playlist. And despite putting a big effort into finding new gold gems, you can’t put a finger on new good song.

You need to renew your Youtube/Spotify playlist.

And what the best way than to ask some advice?

Erwin Smith:

You are looking all around for him. He’s not answering to his phone, and he’s neither in his office (which is weird because at this point Erwin in an indoor plant). So, you walk along the corridor, hoping to find him somewhere until you saw him through a window, training alone.

He’s so sweety from his training that his shirt draws perfectly his back muscle and you can’t stop yourself to stare at this perfectly cooked French fries. But Erwin is one of those soldiers that can literally feel if someone is staring at them, even in their back, or who is just simply near them. Therefore, you didn’t have a long stare before he turn back at you while you were walking toward him. He had those fancy sporty branded Bluetooth earplug because he like to be free of movement while training, so he took one off and ask:

“Need’ somethings (Y/N)?” He asked.

Since you saw that he was is a hardcore training session, you putted your training outfit to join him. You were bored after all, and it cost nothing to keep you in health when you have no other thing to do. Plus, it would be a cunning way to find some music recommendation from your elder.

“I thought I could take advantage of this well weather and move my ass, you declare.

“Good choice, the man answers with a smile.”

He’s about to put back his earplug when you just left you hand to get his attention.

“Yes?

“I just realized I completely forgot either my earplug or my phone too…” You’re twiddling your fingers together, giving a light smile “You mind letting your music on speaker?

“Well…” It’s a weird request you gave here, completely out of the usual one. He frowns a brow “I’m listening to some old’ music, I don’t think it’s going to suit your taste.

“I don’t mind, I listen to a little bit of everything!

“It at your own risk.”

Erwin lift his shoulder in a shrug moves, not wanting to demand why you ask that out of nowhere. He trusts you enough to do not judge his taste and went continuing his training.

And you couldn’t guess he were that kind of classic guys. The music where good though, made you remember those were existing since they are years old now. But yeah, you can’t judge, you had at least listen one of those when you were in your teen age around the 10’.

Author Note:

I imagine him as a feminist man. He is not into downgrading people nor into pushing women down. Let’s be clear: he like strong women and strong men. And you could find his taste in person into his taste in music. Husky voice, powerful message and strong women. Especially when his training.

I can completely imagine him listening to some Beyoncé’s music.

Playlist :

Beyoncé – Run the World

Beyoncé – Single Lady

Gwen Stephany – The sweet escape

Amy Winehouse – Rehab

Lady Gaga - Judas

Mike Zacharias:

You know exactly one person who would have cool new music to discover from. This guy that had been, according to the rumour, a nice and cool ‘fuckboy’ during his teen. And, you have to admit, you still find him really cool (and sexy) for his thirties.

You’re running around the castle, going from the favourites spots of him you know. You end up finding him against a tree nearby the castle, all sweety and sleepy. The man just finished his chores and were trying to take a nap.

“Mike!” You call him from far away. The man lifts his hand in your direction, a very slight smile on his lips. When you arrived under the tree he is laying, you just put your ass on the grass and lay you head on his chest.

You both are close enough for you to trust him, and him too. It happens that someday you bring, for you both, things to drink and just casually spend your sleepy rest day together, laying outside and just passively talk.

“I need your help.” You finally say after resting your eyes for a good minute. “And I’m pretty sure you’re a man of good taste.

“Go on, he lazily answers. What’ your problem?

“I’m looking for new music to listen.”

You can feel his chest lift himself in a little chuckle.

“I’m kinda of an old’ fashion man by myself, he purred to himself. Check if you want, but I’m not sure ya going to like everything. Some are kind of out of date.”

He searches for his phone in his pocket, taking it out of one of those with a pair of messy earbuds. He turns it on and put you on his music library from his phone app. And you weren’t even surprise, looking through his music taste, that he had pulled some girl with his good, flirty, taste.

Author Note:

Mike would likely be a sweet guy, but still would impress just by his glare. Everybody think he’s a Don Juan, and of course he had been during his teenage years. He was young and would have played with that. And who know, maybe some song has story linked to it?

So of course, his music taste would had been influence by those years. The early rock time during the 00’ to 10’. He wasn’t as cliché as Liking Park, but let me said to you I’m pretty sure he would have some full album of AC/DC. But for the normal day, just chilling outside and listening to some, you could find him mostly listen to some Bruno mars, Justin Timberlake or The Weeknd between some old hit like Supermassive from Muse or some AC/DC.

Playlist:

Bruno Mars – That what I like.

Bruno Mars – Fall from Heaven

Justin Timberlake – Filthy

The Weekend – Can’t feel my face

Muse – Supermassive

Måneskin – Beggin’

Jean Kirstein:

You would have look for him the whole damn day, but it feels like he completes disappear from earth surfaces. It only when you received his text that you realized he spend his day outside; it was his off days.

In his text, he proposes you for a drink, adding that they would be Connie, Sasha, Eren, Mikasa and Armin. Not everybody where off day, so when you went back to change yourself from the training outfit to something more ‘city’ vibe, you meet Armin on his way.

You both went to meet up the group at a bar. And the Bartender is pretty chill with everybody. They all aged up enough to drink, and know by the director of the pub so you all have a good seat in a corner far away from the crown. Everything is going so well.

So much you all decided to just go walk around and put your ass on the sand near a lake. Eren, Connie and Armin are the first of who took off they shoe to put they feet in the water. The moon went just up in the sky, but it still bright. At this time of the years, night fall around nine now, so you have more time to spend outside without worrying too much to be caught by the dark. Plus, the moon is bright tonight, putting a sweat atmosphere.

Jean took off a speaker from a little backpack he had with him. He links it up from his phone and put everything on the ground. He’s as excited as his friend to go play in the water, so it’s with his shoes barely took off that he run to them and jump on Eren. At this moment, you just sit on the ground. You were about to take off your shoes before your eyes gotten caught by Jean’s screen phone lighting from a notification. So, you shouted at the group:

“Jean! I’m checking your playlist!”

He turns to you and throw a thumb up at you. He’s about to go back to bother his friend before his eyes open wide and he turn again back at you:

“Wait! Please (Y/N)!”

At the same moment, you were looking through his Spotify before you realized a notification from twitter. Someone was mentioning his twitter account to which name were weirdly remember you one of those really popular account about Taylor Swift.

From the corner of your eyes, you see Jean running back to you. His away of reaction made you think he is trying to hide something, and it made you want to know what. So, you quickly went back on his Spotify. You just go through his playlist as fast as you can like a little sneaky rat, and check with a little smile, feeling he had something to hide. You have the time to see the “hook up” playlist and the “Best Taylor Swift song” Before Jean took back his phone from your hand.

When you lift your eyes to his face, you can guess he’s a little blushy mess. He just sight, seeing your smile:

“It stays between you and me, nobody else.

“Taylor Swift stan eh?

“She’s a Queen!”

You chuckle. It wasn’t obvious he would stan someone like her, but now that you know it, it doesn’t surprise you. Jean always likes strong women, and she’s fitting is the cases of a strong and independent woman.

“So, the twitter acc-

“Yes.”

That’s the only answer you got.

“So, now that I know your deepest secret, you really won’t mind his I keep continue looking through your playlist?

“Why do you want?

“Just looking for some new song to listen, I sand down mind until it’s dry. I need new thing to discover otherwise I’ll run mad.”

Jean rises a brow. He left a flirty smile appear and bend a little over you, he’s about to say something but you just guessed and cut it off:

“Yes, I’d like you to show me your ‘hook up’ playlist one day maybe?” A little wink from you and he lost his livelihood. “But can I get a preview first? Maybe I could add some too?

“Go on, he smiles back, I’d be curious to see your style.”

Author Note:

Let me tell you right now: I’m 99% sure Jean would be a Taylor Swift hardcore fan. He loves strong and independent women. And he is 100% a lover. He would likely defend Taylor in no matter what. In another hand, he would also listen to some classic music too of course. You could find a few The Weeknd (he’s not a very big fan, just save some for a more hotty moment). He’s also into old R&B too, or classic music like some’s of Robbie William music or Olly murs.

Playlist :

Avicii – Addicted to you

Taylor Swift – Look what you made me do

Taylor Swift – Bad Reputation

Robbie William – Candy

Olly Murs – Troublemaker

Estelle – American Boys

Backstreet boy – that way

Zoe Hange:

You already know where to look at when you’re want to find them. Therefor you immediately go down the corridor, and took the stairs to reach the giant basement of the castle.

You went here so often that those dark alleys doesn’t even scare you anymore, neither those weirds noises coming from afar. And you’re about to scream Hange’s name while pushing the big wooden door, to only find one pair of eyes staring back at you after your entrance.

Moblit’s one actually. Surrounded by dark dust that took the form from the supposedly googled hanging around his neck. He looked like a raccoon at the moment. The poor man is laying on the ground, his hand stuck into a metal jar. You can see pick on a tear pearling a corner on his eye.

“I’m stu~uck, he murmurs in a desperate voice.

“Moblit, what happened?

“Too long to explain, he waggles his stuck hand in the air. Can you be sweetheart and pull that jar for me?”

Without needing any explanation for now, you shrugged and accept; poor Moblit had to pay for being the assistant of Hange.

You stand up on top of him still laying on the floor, and put a foot on his shoulder. Both hand on the metallic Jar, you tried to pull it over Moblit’s hand with him telling you how to turn it or to stop. And you both couldn’t containing you rage while the thing wouldn’t want to come out. Hence you just try to draw it even harder, putting your whole strength into it.

But suddenly, something caught your attention. A big slam caught you out of guard and made you startle. Your sweaty hand slipped of the jar and you fall, ass first, on the ground.

“Found it!” Scream Hanji while slamming the door behind them. “We can break it with that!”

They walk to Moblit and show a Handsaw right under his nose. The man swallows hardly, the metal from the handsaw is shining under the light, making it definitely looking like a thing they would use to torture someone. At this distance he can see his reflexion into it.

“Section commander Hange…” Moblit’s voice is clearly showing that he’s rather unsure of how the issue of this situation is going. “Maybe I should go to-

“What you’re saying ???” State Hange. “We’re going to easily cut it out your wrist with that!

“You know how to use it?

“Of course not, I’ve never handled one like that before, they never let me too…” For a few second, they are pensive, but came back to reality when Moblit click his tong. “But it’s seemed easy! I just trying it outside on a tree and it’s manageable!

“What ?!” He ran his free hand across his face, both done and scare. “Section commander- with respect- there is no way I’m going to let you approach me with this thing!

“Why Moblit ?!

“I don’t want to lose my hand!!!

“You’re not going to!!”

He stares at them without a blink of an eyes. And it where enough for them to forgot the idea. With a victorious sight, the man passes them, patting they shoulder, and went off the room.

“I wanted to try!” Say Hange once he’s gone. “Moblit is to frightens sometimes…

“I mean, he got a point, you say.”

Your voice surprised Hange. It almost like they were back in they thought and you just get them in the middle of it. It often happens that they completely forgot about people standing in the room until those talk. And when they realized the presence of you, they are gladly happy to realized they aren’t alone. After all, they spend so much time alone during their experiences that they learn to close themselves into their mind. You think that it’s mostly why Moblit had been assigned to monitoring them; At least it made them come back on earth from time to time.

“Come one (Y/N)!

“No, no, no, they got a point.” You shrugged.

Hange rolled they eyes, putting the handsaw away (but near enough so they would not forget to try it for some experience). They were about to go back to their office when their phone just ringed. It was a call from Levi, but it didn’t make them pick up the phone.

“He’s gonna come here anyway.” They say while pursing they lips. “Wanna’ help me for now?”

They pointed you. You shake your head with a wild smile which visibly is contagious. Hange, slap they hand together before telling you what to do. And that how you ended up walking around the lab, looking for thing they told you about while they decided to put, their playlist.

Hange is that kind of people that like to work with some sound, and you were also here for that. You love spending time with them, and plus they seem to have good taste; so, you were pretty sure you were gonna have a lot to listen later.

Author note:

As far as I’m concerned, Hange one’s was the hardest to find. I don’t know how to explain it but I can completely see them listening to some electro, slow, sexy music. I completely see seem listening the Queen of Stone Age with their deep voice and sound that made you travel through a sci-fi mood.

I’m pretty sure, in a modern era, they would love Sci-fi things and be impress to recreate what exist in TV show or movie. They would love all those nerds show like Star trek, Star Wars of even Superhero one. That would echo on they taste.

So, it’s either that kind of music, or soundtrack from those kind of movie/ TV Show. They surely would love the vibe which would made them travel far away and tickle they curiosity and imagination.

Playlist :

Queen Of the Stone Age – Make it Wit Chu (virgin magnetic material Remix)

Sohodolls – Ban Bang Bang Bang

Magdalena Bay – Killshot (Showed+ Reverse)

Pursuit Of Happiness - (Steve Aoki Dance Remix)

Two Feet – Fire in My Head

[mellometal]

Is it time to tear ANOTHER Dhar Mann video to shreds? YOU BET.

I've been sitting on this one for a bit because I wanted to make sure I talk about this tactfully. The subject of parents abandoning their disabled children is a very touchy one.

Parents abandoning their disabled children simply for being disabled is way too common. Like, I understand that not everyone has the resources to care for a disabled child (which is why you reach out for help, and why people like me, who work with disabled people, exist), but it doesn't mean you just walk out of their life. There are exceptions, like if you truly didn't want children or something like that, but just flat-out walking out of your kid's life BECAUSE they're disabled is fucked up.

I know someone personally whose biological mother abandoned her when she was born. Why? Because she's disabled. Physically, and mentally, to a point. I work with this woman on a daily basis. I don't really know WHY exactly her biological mother abandoned her, but I do know that her being disabled was part of it. It's sad. It doesn't affect her, thankfully. I'm happy that she's got her biological dad, her brother, and another maternal figure in her life, at least.

ANYWAYS. Before we get to the topic at hand, I need to put an obligatory trigger warning, like I do with EVERY Dhar Mann post:

This post will be talking about parents abandoning their disabled children simply for being disabled, treating disabilities like they're tragedies (in this case, we're talking about autism...again), divorce, and some SPICY ableist bullshit from an allistic (nonautistic) PIECE OF SHIT.

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable in any way, you don't have to read this post. This isn't worth putting yourself in a bad state mentally. I would never ask for any of you to put yourselves in that position all for a post. Put your mental health and well-being first. Consume media that sparks joy for you.

As far as my response goes, it's definitely more calm than normal. Funny....since this video is about autism spectrum disorder again. (Third time's the charm, huh, Dhar Mann? NOT.)

LET'S FUCKING GET IT.

The video starts off with these two parents (Gwen and Allen) in a psychologist's office. The psychologist tells the parents that their son (Chance) is autistic, and she tries to explain what autism is to the parents, but Allen cuts her off. Why? Because he teaches at a prestigious university, so he AUTOMATICALLY knows what autism is from that fact alone.

Um, excuse me? Just because you're a teacher at a prestigious university, it doesn't mean you're an expert in everything. It doesn't make you an expert in ASD or anything like that. Unless you SPECIALIZE in that area. Even then, shut the fuck up. The people who know about being autistic are AUTISTIC PEOPLE THEMSELVES! SHOCKER.

Hey, Dhar Mann! QUIT WITH THE VIDEOS ABOUT AUTISTIC LITTLE WHITE BOYS AND YOUNG WHITE AUTISTIC CISHET MEN! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF IT. It's annoying, ignorant, and it feels like you're doing this on purpose at this point to piss people off. If you're so uninformed about autism in women and girls, FUCKING ASK AUTISTIC WOMEN AND GIRLS! DO BETTER RESEARCH THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE AUTISM SPEAKS. The Autism Self Advocacy Network (ASAN) and the Autistic Women and Nonbinary People Network (AWN) are great organizations to go to for any kind of research on ASD in women and girls. STOP GOING OFF OF THE BRAINS OF AUTISTIC WHITE BOYS AND AUTISTIC WHITE MEN.

I don't feel I need to go too deep into the fact that autistic women, autistic girls, autistic nonbinary people, autistic BIPOC, autistic AAPI, autistic LGBT people, autistic teenagers, and autistic adults exist. Y'all already know.

Gwen asks the psychologist if that means Chance isn't healthy. (I understand not knowing about autism, but don't treat it like it's a terminal illness. Please.) The psychologist tells her that Chance is fine, but he just learns differently and might need more support compared to his peers.

Yeah, autism can affect how you learn about certain things (limited and repetitive patterns), but there are other disabilities that can affect learning as well. Like how dyslexia can affect your ability to read, dyspraxia can affect your ability to do math, and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can affect your ability to focus or on impulse control. Autism affects how your brain is developed, it affects you socially, behaviorally, and how you communicate.

Allen is upset, says that he can't have a son "with a learning disability" (ASD is a neurological disability, not necessarily a learning disability), and treats Chance like he's stupid for being autistic. Gwen tells her husband that autism doesn't make you any less intelligent, WHICH IS SO FUCKING TRUE. ABSOLUTE FACTS. I was totally with her until she began that little monologue with "Just because a person HAS autism". SAY "JUST BECAUSE A PERSON'S AUTISTIC" INSTEAD! IT'S NOT HARD. PERSON FIRST LANGUAGE ISN'T WHAT EVERY DISABLED PERSON PREFERS. Allen says that "they could have another kid" and "put Chance up for adoption". Gwen obviously wasn't down with that. Allen gives his wife an ultimatum that it's either HIM or their son Chance. Gwen says that she can't choose between the two, but she will stand by her autistic son. Allen gets up and leaves the office, saying he wants a divorce.

Years pass by, Gwen is single and taking care of her autistic son Chance, and Allen has a new life with a ✨perfect son✨ (Samuel). He never mentions the son HE abandoned (Chance). He's completely forgotten about Gwen and Chance. (YOU OWE SO MUCH CHILD SUPPORT, ALLEN.)

Hey, Allen, how much do you wanna bet that your ✨perfect son✨ Samuel is autistic too?

There's the SATs, they're announcing a winner, and guess who it is? IT'S OBVIOUSLY CHANCE, OF COURSE. He's got the highest score in the country, with Samuel in second place. Allen is PISSED.

Chance gives a speech about how his mom really helped him, he struggled with autism, how Allen LITERALLY ABANDONED HIM, and THE CROWD GOES FUCKING WILD. Samuel, instead of being a sore loser, APPLAUDS FOR CHANCE. Stay humble, Sam.

My thoughts on the video? If you cannot tell by my tone throughout this post, IT WAS DOG SHIT. This video was insensitive to the true reality of parents abandoning their disabled children just because they're disabled. What do I expect from Dhar Mann at this point?

Here's my response to his video below. Don't worry, I will fully type out my response soon for anyone who cannot read the screenshots easily. It's a lot easier for me to do that on the desktop site than it is for me to do it on my phone.

For anyone who can’t read my response, I’m typing it out for you. Like I said, it’s easier for me to type it out on the desktop site than it is for me to type it out on my phone. It’s a real royal pain in the ass. But because I’m trying to make my posts easier to read for people, I’m doing this anyway. /lighthearted

First, second, and third screenshots (broken up into paragraphs):

Hey, listen, I appreciate the message you’re trying to go for, but can you please stop putting autistic people into a box? Can you stop treating being autistic like it’s a tragedy? Not every single autistic person is a little white boy in elementary school who’s considered “wild and unruly” or “super quiet and makes no friends”, nor are they a young white cishet man who’s a super genius or is how Chris Chan was before she came out as trans. (For anyone who doesn’t know about Chris Chan, there are many documentaries people have made on YouTube, and I highly recommend Geno Samuel’s docuseries, if you’re really interested in learning about Chris Chan.)

Autistic women, girls, nonbinary people, BIPOC, APPI, LGBT people, teenagers, and adults all exist too. 

It’s very apparent now that you get your resources from Autism $peaks, a hate group that spends the vast majority of their money on funding eugenics instead of helping autistic people like they claim, claims that only little white boys and young white cishet men are autistic and ignores all other autistic people who don’t fit that description, have no autistic people on their leader board or on any board for that matter, have members who have actually fantasized about k1lling their autistic children, treat autism like it’s a tragedy or a disease someone can catch (completely false), act like autism should be cured (there is no cure, and ABA therapy is a total shit show in itself), and treats autistic people like they’re broken and need to be fixed. Also, not every autistic person is a Super Genius(tm). That’s so demeaning to autistic people who aren’t seen as intelligent in any way. I’m autistic and seen as smart; however, there are subjects I’m stronger in than others.

If you can’t handle the possibility of having autistic children, or just disabled children in general, DON’T HAVE CHILDREN. If you can’t handle working with or alongside disabled people, including autistic people, maybe find a different profession. Even if you do that, you’ll never get away from disabled people. Disabled people aren’t a disease. We’re human beings just like neurotypical and able-bodied people.

Fourth and fifth screenshots (broken up into paragraphs): 

I would highly suggest getting resources from reputable organizations for ASD, such as the Autism Self Advocacy Network (ASAN) and the Autistic Women and Nonbinary People Network (AWN). Talk to any autistic person who isn’t a little white boy or a young white cishet man. 

Instead of using the puzzle piece, which is a symbol that many autistic people, myself included, are offended by (because of Autism $peaks and other organizations before them using it, plus it symbolizes that only autistic children exist and that we’re “missing a piece” like we’re broken), use the rainbow infinity sign (for all neurodivergent people) or the red and gold infinity sign (just for autistic people). Instead of “lighting it up blue”, light it up red or gold. Do both if you want. 

I’m actually really sick and tired of seeing just autistic little white boys and young autistic white cishet men being represented in the media, and y’all manage to fuck that up too. 

Before anyone mentions Sia’s movie “Music”, that’s also very poor representation of autistic girls. Besides, the actress who played the autistic girl isn’t even autistic. She MOCKED autistic people. I know she’s a kid, but that’s still super fucked up. I hope she’s able to turn that around. 

If anyone would like to discuss this topic with me or ask any questions, feel free to. I’ll answer as best as I can. Thank you and have a good night.

Before I get attacked for mentioning Chris Chan in my response, I bring up Chris Chan because allistic people think that every autistic person is like her (especially before she came out as trans). That person is part of why I wasn't open about being autistic or talking about my diagnosis until this year. I didn't want to be grouped up with Chris Chan because I do have very similar interests to her, I've been seen as cringey for having said interests, and just the way Chris treated autistic people who were formerly diagnosed with A$p3rg3r$ $yndr0m3 (like I was) really made me feel even more alienated.

Also, S1a supports A$ (Autism $p3aks). She's not a very good person to support. Some of her music is good, but her as a person....no. Her movie "Music" was gross, from what I've read about it and seen pictures of.

If you've read this far, thank you so much!

[yoursapphicgirlfriend]

Are you a sapphic/lesbian/WLW person?

This is the blog for you then!

Hi, you can call me YSG. I’ve been out of the closet since I was in the 7th grade (despite my unsupportive, religious family), but for the life of me, I could not find a girlfriend!

I began thinking something was deeply wrong with me. That I was alone in the world and no girl or sapphic person would ever love me. Then it dawned on me that so many other WLW individuals must be feeling the same way, and one look at the popular online community Lesbian TikTok proved that to be true!

That’s when my dream started.

I wanted to provide a girlfriend figure for lonely individuals or people who just haven’t found the one yet, almost like an interactive fanfiction that you can step into and enjoy. I'm here to offer you a friend, a girlfriend, a lover, a partner in crime, a sci-fi adventure—just let me know what you like, and I'll see what I can do :) I post a ton of free content across all my social media accounts and my commissions are currently open!

If you like roleplaying, this is a great space for you!

If you enjoy ASMR, this is a great space for you!

If you’re into a lot of fandoms (especially anime/animation), this is a great space for you!

If you identify as a sapphic/lesbian/WLW person, this is definitely a great space for you!

If you’re questioning whether you like women or not, this is a great space for you!

If you like LGBTQ+ memes, this is a great space for you!

If you’re a cool person, this is a great space for you!

If you like poetry and/or fanart, my Instagram is a great space for you!

If you like weekly uploads of full-length F4F audios, my YouTube is a great space for you!

If you like daily FxF videos and pop culture rants (about my favorite sapphic characters), my TikTok is a great space for you!

Basically, this is a great space for you, so come on in here and let’s have some fun!

Let's get to know each other better, because if you’ve made it this far, I can already tell you’re pretty awesome :)

[pointlesstrashyexistence]

More Sam headcanons

Sam is the one who makes sure Jack knows how to take care of his hair. Dean has had the same hairstyle for the last 15 years and, as much as I love this man, I truly do believe he’s the type to use the sin that is 3-in-1 body wash, shampoo, and conditioner. Sam is the one who has to be like “No, those are completely different things, don’t listen to Dean. He’s still performing masculinity.” Cas usually just makes himself clean automatically so the intricacies of hair care and hygiene are a little lost on him.

We already know Sam is a theater kid and I truly do believe that they find the best quality bootlegs of broadway and off broadway shows that they can, and saves them to their laptop to watch later, often with the rest of Team Free Will. Jack especially enjoys the Disney ones although Sam thinks the Disney ones are the most obvious somewhat lifeless cash-grabs (the only exception to this is Lion King on Broadway which is still amazing), but has a soft spot for Frozen. Sam loves Cabaret. Cas appreciates musical theater as a modern reiteration of Ancient Greek theater and opera and favors Hadestown despite its creative liberties. Dean tries to appear uninterested but gets teary-eyed about Dear Evan Hansen.

Sam learns more American sign language through Cas. Cas is an ancient eldritch being who knows basically every language in the world and I believe is fluent in all forms of sign language. They mostly focus on learning ASL so Sam can sign with Eileen.

Sam can sleep with lights on and loud noise all around them. Youngest siblings are just kind of used to noise being all around them so we get used to learning how to do that.

Freshman year at Stanford, a lot of Sam’s clothes were hand me downs from Dean they didn’t want to get rid of. Because he felt safe enough to start experimenting, they would thrift through women’s sections of thrift stores and cut up and sew clothes to make new outfits for themselves. Sam was still comfortable with their masculinity and presenting as masc but enjoys how colorful and free clothes that make them more femme presenting are.

Because of this and Sam’s theater nerd background, I think Sam watches a lot of YouTube videos on sewing, fashion, fashion history, and costuming. Enjoys how fun and bizarre Micarah Towers is and the analysis of fashion trends and costumes by Mina Le and ModernGurlz

Because Sam is good at empathizing with people, he is also good at understanding what makes them tick and their deep insecurities. They can manipulate the shit out of anyone if they want to but choose not to (except with Jack because I’m sorry and I love Sam so much but Dean was kind of right when he called out Sam for claiming to care about Jack when he was also using Jack to try and find a way to open the portal). This also means that Sam can immediately devastate anyone by pointing out the thing they hate most about themselves like that John Mulaney skit about 13-year-olds

Often fine being left alone for long periods of time but will start little petty shit just because he’s bored like that scene from Parks and Rec where Ron asks who broke the coffee pot and everyone starts blaming each other and in the end Ron broke it but felt like everyone was getting too chummy. Sam in my mind is like the cat who you’re trying to find in the house and when you do its looks you in the eye while calmly pushing a glass cup off the table.

Sam is very interested in learning more about witchcraft and magic but realizes they are white and doesn’t really ascribe to any religion anymore since God turns out be just some guy who was a shitty absent father and later turns out to be an evil universe destroying tyrant and other gods are real. So he tries to be more moral and ethical in learning magic from other religious, ethnic, and racial groups and when encountering a closed practice respectfully leaves the practitioners and magic alone.

Sam and Jack’s father-son relationship is different from Jack’s with Dean or Cas. Sam understands Jack not quite feeling like he has a place in the world and being seen as dangerous and being so terrified of your power knowing it comes from this thing that is dark and evil but recognizing it is your power and up to you to learn how to control it and what you want to do with it. Taking care of Jack has also given Sam more perspective on how Dean raised him and furthers his respect for Dean and his understanding that part of why Dean continues to treat him like a child is because Dean was basically his father.