#I feel like this has been done before but alas I did have this concept suddenly and was like 'I must make this image'

[omgfloofy]

Let's just answer the whole damn list.

1: How many fics have you worked on since January?

I've got the ever present dal segno al coda that I've always been working on this year. However, in May, I came up with the concepts that turned into The Insurgent King and this has kind of taken over EVERYTHING in my mind.

I also got a couple of Ys fics out, a pretty dark story for Van Arkride, and a couple of one shot stories for FFXV.

2: What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year?

👏 MAFIA 👏 ADJACENT 👏

Insurgent King has been SO MUCH FUN because it's really delving a lot into the dark underbelly of stuff. I also got to use my AP style from Endless History in a fic with The King's Interview in that series.

But in general, writing has been amazingly therapeutic for me. It was something I started after my mom's death in 2022 as a bit of personal therapy. I think having time to be in make believe worlds writing fantasy and adventure when it sometimes feels like my world is falling apart has helped me more than you can believe.

Additionally, an upcoming story that I've been planning for Insurgent King is straight up a heist story, ala Oceans 11 and so forth. I've never done something like this before and it has been the craziest thing I've had to plan. And it's the one story that doesn't have a shit ton of stuff already written for it, since the heist needs to be so carefully put together.

I'm SO excited for that story to finally get released. I can't wait for people to read it because it's been so much fun to plan.

3: What piece of media inspired you the most? (This can be the fandom you wrote the most for, the one that spawned the most ideas, the one you thought about the most, etc.)

Final Fantasy XV seems to be the game to keep on giving me a lot of inspiration for ideas. However, I've been finding inspiration for my stories in so many things all over the place.

Trails Through Daybreak has served as much of a supportive 'vibe check' for Insurgent King, as an example. Watching through Tower of God's S2 anime has reminded me of how COOL that comic is and since I've started writing, I've started finding a whole new appreciation for fiction and other stories all over the place. The biggest influence this year, though, has been from old TV shows ala Lost and Stargate, both of which have been an immense inspiration for the storytelling method behind Insurgent King. Look at it like a serialized TV series and the way I'm writing it will probably make a lot more sense.

4: How many fandoms did you write for this year?

For things published, three: Final Fantasy XV, Ys, and Trails.

For things that are still in my WIPs bin? Lost Universe, No Man's Sky, and Helldivers.

5: What ships captured your heart?

I adore Lunoct - but I fully understand that my bias comes from working on dal segno al coda, which is kind of my baby. I can't wait to start releasing it, because Noctis and Lunafreya are the quintessential power couple in it, and fate does not want them together because of the shit they can do when united in it.

6: What characters captured your heart?

I know this was from something I released last year, but it was at the very end of the year, and it still carried over through this year: Anemona from Ys IX. I would not have written anything for her if it wasn't for the Yuletide exchange.

I've also found myself loving the hell out of writing Gladio in my FFXV fics. He's started to become one of the easiest characters for me to write, even.

Also, writing in the point of view of Regis in The King's Gambit. I want to write something that's far more enjoyable for him than the ball of anxiety he was in that fic. Shit was going poorly and he had to change everything to make it go less poorly in that story. I just want something with him being happy.

7: Did you write for any new fandoms or ships this year?

I hadn't written/released anything for the Trails series, strangely enough, until I wrote Cannot Deny His Sleepless Eyes. I have another fic that I've been dabbling with that's Trails from Zero/Trails to Azure, but I'm not far enough to really call anything for it.

8: What fic meant the most to you to write?

The Cordelia Manifest.

This was the first fic of the Insurgent King series. Think of it like the pilot for a TV series. I wrote it based on vibes I got while listening to music from Bubblegum Crisis. While doing so, I realized that I love this setting a LOT and really needed to delve into it more and explain out how Insomnia fell and Noctis became a king of the criminal underworld in it.

9. What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

Lost and Found.

This was my fic in the FFXV Remix event that happened earlier this year. I had so much fun reading a fic called The new guy by MiraNjell and chose it for my remix fic.

A lot of this was pulled from my own personal experiences from getting a new puppy this year.

10: What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing?

The Insurgent King.

In this case, not the series, but the fic named for the series. This is my longest published fic on AO3, and I felt so proud of actually getting it done.

11: What fic was the most difficult to write?

ad astra is one of my FFXV wips. I've come and go with it several times, but since it delves very hard into concepts that are "beyond human understanding" and kind of delves a bit into cosmic horror… it's easily one of the most difficult projects ahead of me. I want to read more cosmic/eldritch horror before I try to write more of it, and I really want to become a much better writer to do this concept justice.

With what I released, it would be Cannot Deny His Sleepless Eyes. I've never written whump before and this was somewhat uncomfortable as it has a lot of heavily implied child abuse. It's only 400'ish words, but I didn't want to expand on it any further.

12: What fic was the easiest to write?

Infiltration! I just sat on the ending for ages, and then decided "boom" and knocked that shit out in a couple of hours. A lot of Noctis and Prompto's interactions remind me very much of the same kind of 'two friends who lose all brain cells when together' friendship that I have with my best friend.

In fact, the "be quiet" aspect of Infiltration was actually based on a real bet with my best friend from years and years ago.

13: What were your shortest and longest fics posted this year?

Shortest: Cannot Deny His Sleepless Eyes - 414 words

Longest: The Insurgent King (story, not series.) - 62,638

14: What were your go-to writing songs?

I made a whole ass playlist for Insurgent King.

15: What was the hardest fic to title?

Filed Away. I still am not 100% happy with the title.

16: What's your favorite title of the year?

There's an upcoming story in my Insurgent King series called A Field of Flowers. I love everything about this title. I can't wait for people to see just why it's an amazing title, too.

17: Share your favorite opening line

Ring ring. Ring ring. Ring ring. Click. "Fisherman's Lighthouse." "Good… [afternoon], this is an automated call from Concordo Shipping. Your freight parcel has been scanned in at… [Pier Lots Warehouse] and will be ready for pick up in… [forty-eight hours]. Failure to pick up your parcel… [one week] after its release will see that your parcel is forfe–" Click.

The above is the opening from Observator, one of the side stories in Insurgent King. I love it because I think you can hear the automated voice on the line.

18: Share your favorite ending line

Voices echoed through Regis' quickly fading consciousness. He saw the flash of blue, glimmering magic in front of him. He couldn't make out the words from the woman's voice — it sounded as if he was under water. He had no time. He held his left hand up to her. He needed the ring to be noticed immediately. "Take it." His strength faded fast. "Take it to…" But Regis Lucis Caelum never got out that last word before he died on the steps of the Citadel.

The above is the ending (before the super short epilogue) of The King's Gambit, the third story of the Insurgent King series. Regis' death is a catalyst to everything in the series, and I wanted the story that was in his POV to end abruptly as he died. There would be no more 'voice' for the POV any longer, afterall.

19: Share your favorite piece of dialogue

"It's not home." Noct said as he crossed the room and started to poke through the bag. It's dinner, but instead of commenting on the food, he mused out loud, "I'm surprised, though. Ignis is usually super critical when I'm too lax about hiding my identity." "You could make it easier and introduce me to them as your cousin Gladio Gar." "No." Noct stopped, then looked up. He sounded a lot sharper than he initially intended, but continued with it, "Don't. That's my thing." Gladio leaned back with a smug grin. The chair groaned in protest at the large man's weight from the action. "Yeah, I know." He paused for a second, just for the timing of it. "It shouldn't be." "I have a good cover here." Noct mumbled as he dropped into his own chair and opened the box to look through the food. It was a burger — he was surprised it wasn't Cup Noodles. "It's about as great as a baseball cap." "It works!" Noct grabbed a fry out of the box and threw it at Gladio. He laughed as it only bounced harmlessly off his head.

The above is from A Part to Play, one of my Twilight extra stories that's still in WIP format. I have to be extremely careful with this one because it has some very technical stuff to describe and I need to take my time. It should be out soon, though.

19: Share your funniest line

This time, the roles were switched. Luna took hold of Noctis' wrist and walked ahead to lead him, instead. "What's the worst he could do to us?" "To you." Noctis didn't fight being pulled along. "He wouldn't do anything to you." A beat. "He'd just kick my ass in our next training session." "If he's kicking your ass," It was so weird to hear Luna repeat his own words. She always knew what to say and the perfect way to say it, when Noctis felt he fell short in that skillset. Luna quickly glanced back to say, "Then you just need to…" She paused, as she seemed to search for the words, then continued, "get good and show him what for." Noctis thought, at first, that he must have not heard her right. The words and Luna's voice just didn't sound right together. After running that over in his head again, he finally laughed. "I'm sorry. Who are you and what did you do with Lunafreya?"

This is from Date Night, my little 'preview fic' for Noctis and Lunafreya in dal segno al coda.

This fic is a single night of events that just didn't fit in the full narrative of the main story and is Noctis and Lunafreya having an evening out together in Insomnia. (takes place during part 2)

I really have a lot of fun with Noct and Luna in segno. I know I said it before, but I'll say it again: I really can't wait to get comfortable enough to start posting it, because I want people to really have fun with what the two are capable of in that story.

As I said before, they are very much a power couple in dal segno al coda, except there are points here and there when Noctis and Lunafreya just have the chance to be the people they could never otherwise be.

20: What's something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story?

I would go as far as to say that the sudden idea behind Solus popping into my head was a big surprise. It doesn't change the overall story of the Insurgent King, but it does add more to it, I feel.

There's also a contender for biggest 'surprise' that came about from writing part 2 of segno. This wasn't this year - I think I wrote the scene last year, even - but I'm still trying to contend with it. I feel like I have to fight over 'how far is too far' with the idea.

It changed a LOT of segno and triggered a lot of rewrites, as well. However, it was very much a case of 'Lunafreya wants what she wants, and it's not necessarily what the author originally wanted.' LOL

21: What writing programs did you use? Did you write by hand?

I started using Google Drive, but I was introduced to Ellipsus this year and I love it so much. So I've started migrating my works to it.

While it's not the main parts of the story themselves, I have a plnner for dal segno al coda, that I use to keep track of dates in it and what happens around said dates.

I also have been carrying a tiny composition book in my purse to use when I get ideas while away from home.

22: If you had to choose one, what was THE most satisfying writing moment of your year?

I would actually put that towards The King's Interview and when I looked at the finished product on AO3. Not so much the writing part of it, but the design work and workskin editing. Since I have a web development background, I really love playing with AO3 workskins and think they can be a very powerful tool in storytelling.

That header image was made from two different stock images, and intended to illustrate the interview, as you would see on a news site or newspaper.

I also did something like it for the Epilogue for The King's Gambit. I made a faux newspaper front page in InDesign, complete with making a believable printed halftone look of the front of the Citadel. There's so much more of that layout than what I showed.

I've also got a story that's doing something like this further down the line in segno - so I may have just lifted that idea from there. segno's 'front page' is a little more complete than this one, however. Complete with extra fake headlines and snippets of other articles and stuff.

23: Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic?

Not necessarily. I think the only real time to celebrate finishing one would be when I finished The Insurgent King - the story, not the series it's named after. This is probably due to the nature of the series, though, since I was immediately in my files and making notes of where to go with the next story and what had to be revealed in it (as well as what I can't reveal yet).

24: How did you recharge between fics?

I might just pull up a game and play a bit. Nothing too fancy.

25: Did you create fanworks other than fic?

Not really, no.

26: How many events did you take part in? (bangs, exchanges, ship weeks, zines, prompt memes, they all count!)

Just one, really. It was the @ffxvremix. I wrote Lost and Found for it.

27: If this were an awards show, who would you thank?

I'd thank, of course, @firefallvaruna for being my amazing beta reader. I'd also thank @snifftheraven. He's been the best sounding board for a lot of my ideas. He's also super honest and tells me when my ideas are too much, or if I have gone down a path that I probably wouldn't want to take.

28: What's left on your to-do list for 2024?

Sadly, my to-do list included getting part 1 of segno done. Then I got sideswiped by a whole new AU called The Insurgent King. Which is on point for that AU's version of Noctis.

I might celebrate the end of the year by working on segno a bit more and maybe pushing that 75-80% completion a little closer to 100%.

29: What would you like to write next year?

Getting segno's part 1 done and started to AO3 is definitely on my planned list for next year. I'm also continuing onward into Insurgent King.

I know the ending to both series. I should be able to make it.

A slightly revised version of last year's questions! Two ways to play: Reblog and have your followers send you numbers, or answer the whole list!

How many fics have you worked on since January?

What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year?

What piece of media inspired you the most? (This can be the fandom you wrote the most for, the one that spawned the most ideas, the one you thought about the most, etc.)

How many fandoms did you write for this year?

What ships captured your heart?

What characters captured your heart?

Did you write for any new fandoms or ships this year?

What fic meant the most to you to write?

What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing?

What fic was the most difficult to write?

What fic was the easiest to write?

What were your shortest and longest fics posted this year?

What were your go-to writing songs?

What was the hardest fic to title?

What's your favorite title of the year?

Share your favorite opening line

Share your favorite ending line

Share your favorite piece of dialogue

Share your funniest line

What's something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story?

What writing programs did you use? Did you write by hand?

If you had to choose one, what was THE most satisfying writing moment of your year?

Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic?

How did you recharge between fics?

Did you create fanworks other than fic?

How many events did you take part in? (bangs, exchanges, ship weeks, zines, prompt memes, they all count!)

If this were an awards show, who would you thank?

What's left on your to-do list for 2024?

What would you like to write next year?

[essektheylyss]

he was present to herald the demise of not one but TWO great flying cities along with the ruin of the age of arcanum. and with your help, he can herald many more

[kydrogendragon]

Hi! I was thinking about Dream dating Hob because a wager with Death. Time passes, Hob can't believe Dream is interested in him/his experiences, but he is so happy, he has so much to live for. Until he finds out about the wager and... He is ok with that! He tells Dream that he thinks they made the wager because Dream was lonely, and it's ok because he was lonely, too. But Dream doesn't hear him, he is so offended, he says "You dare..." and he storms out. Time passes again and, I don't know, there is a happy ending, of course.

Third prompt for the day! This one was fun to write. I feel like it could easily be it's own multi-chapter fic cause it's a real fun concept, but alas, I have too many wips as is, so we'll take the bite-size version :P

Thanks for the request!!

Relationship: Hob/Dream Words: 2293 Warnings: None Ao3 Link

“You know, your sister told me about the wager,” Hob says, looking down into his water glass. Tonight was he and Dream’s six month anniversary. They’re tucked into the back corner booth of the Italian restaurant just down the road from Hob’s own apartment. The place was a pricier one, yes, but Dream had talked about missing their carbonara last week and Hob wasn’t about to let his boyfriend suffer a moment longer without it.

Hob remembers when Dream first approached him in the White Horse back in June. He’d been relaxing with some of his coworkers, celebrating the end of term a bit late, when the most breathtakingly pretty man approached their table. He looked like he’d stepped out of some sort of fantasy novel, like he was the Fae Prince himself. And then those icy blue eyes of his met Hob’s and Hob knew he was done for.

Dream had asked if Hob meant it when he’d claim to know true love the moment he first saw them. Hob had just smiled and said yes. Because he did. And the moment he and Dream’s eyes locked, Hob knew that he was going to love that man. Hob said just as much, which earned him a hearty eye roll at the time. But Dream had said he’d meet him there, at the White Horse, again next week if he’d meant it.

So, of course, Hob had gone back in a week’s time and found the handsome man sitting near the fireplace, nursing a glass of wine. They’d chatted, well, Hob chatted, Dream listened. Hob went on and on about his life, his work. He talked about his friend and family, about his childhood and the new TV show he’s been obsessed with. Then Dream asked him, a few hours later, if he still meant it. If he still thought Dream was his true love.

And Hob said yes.

They continued meeting once a week, which shortly turned to twice a week, then sometimes even sooner, depending on each other’s schedules. Most of the time, they met up someplace in the city for dinner or drinks. Dream had taken him out to the park to feed the birds, which quickly became a common date for them. Then, Hob invited Dream back to his, and Dream said yes. They didn’t do much, just relaxed, watched a movie and ordered take-out, but it was a change in their dynamic. And over the course of those few months, Hob could see Dream relaxing more and more.

The Fae-like man had always seemed overly tense. He carried a weight in his shoulders and his stance that looked just moments away from crushing him. Hob had resolved himself to doing whatever he could to ease some of that stress away from him. And over time, it seemed to work.

The first time Dream had kissed him, Hob thought he’d died and gone to heaven. It was a hesitant thing. They’d been relaxing on Hob’s couch as they had for week by this point. Perhaps they’d had a few more glasses of wine between them than they usually would and maybe sharing a blanket was just an excuse to be close to one another. Dream had turned to him with a look in his eyes that Hob had seen many times before. It glinted with fear, but hope. Then Dream leaned in, slowly, giving time for Hob to back away. Then those rosebud colored lips were finally on his own and it was wonderful. Hob was addicted in just one go.

They didn’t kiss much after, much to Hob’s disappointment, but the times they had felt like magic, but that kiss changed their dynamic. Hob found that Dream was more open to hugs or cuddles in the evening afterwards. He’d even gotten the man to lie his head on Hob’s lap which quickly became a favored position. Hob loved it too. It gave him a chance to just run his fingers through that kitten soft black hair of his. Then six months had passed which felt like forever and also no time at all. If Hob ever doubted his love for this man before, these past months solidified it.

Dream’s sister, Death (a very odd name, but his boyfriend’s name was Dream so who was he to judge?), had tracked him down at the White Horse a week back, which is how he’d found out about their initial wager. She hadn’t told him intentionally. She’d assumed Dream had explained things (he hadn’t) so she’d taken the liberty to explain the situation.

Hob’s pretty sure she thought he’d be angry about it. And yeah, sure, it was a bit of a surprise to hear that Dream had only continued to meet with him after that night because of a dare. But the more he thought about it, the less he really cared. It brought Dream into his life, after all. How could he be mad about that?

Dream looked up at him from over the top of the fancy leather menu, his eyes wide. Hob shot him a smile to try and ease whatever thoughts are running through his boyfriend’s mind. Dream looks back down and slowly closes the menu, setting it in front of him on the white linen tablecloth. He takes a breath before he speaks.

“And what did she say of the wager?” His shoulders are pulled back and his face is carefully masked. Hob knows this posture well. He’s preparing himself to be hurt. The notion makes Hob’s heart ache, so he extends his hand, tilting it upwards just in front of Dream. He doesn’t reach for it, though Hob can see his gaze dart to his open palm.

“Well,” Hob starts, tilting his head down to try and see Dream’s face better. “She said you two overheard me and my boasting that night at the pub. She also said she thought maybe I’d fall in love with you at first sight, which you apparently, and I quote, rolled your eyes so hard she thought they’d get lost in your head.”

Dream rolls his eyes, but Hob spots the twitch of a smile. “She said you thought that was ridiculous and that even if I thought you were striking, I’d soon grow tire of you.” His voice trailed off, softening at the end. Dream swallows, his jaw clenching. It was a fear of his, Hob knew. Dream never said so, not in so many words, but he said it through his actions. Through his carefully constructed face of neutrality, through the fear and the hope that radiates from his eyes when he does something he thinks Hob would dislike. In all the small actions and tentative steps, Dream’s made very clear the fears inside his heart and Hob’s sworn to himself to love each fear away.

“And have you?” Dream asks, his voice quiet.

“No. Never. Told you, one look and I know. I knew. That night, I knew.” Hob replies instantly. He can see the slight shimmer of a tear down Dream’s cheek as he closes his eyes. Dream remains, stiff in his chair, hands in his lap. “I’m glad you made that wager. That your sister made you keep hanging out with me, dating me. I think it’s been good, for both of us. I think… I think maybe she pushed you towards me cause you were lonely. That you needed someone to show you you were worthy of love.”

Dream’s eyes dart to his, a mix of surprise and fury in his face. He’d seen many emotions from his boyfriend over the past six months but anger was rarely one of them. Frustration, irritation, sure, but the way his lip is snarling and his nostrils are flaring, this is true anger. Hob shifts, lifting his hands up in a placating gesture. He rewinds the conversation, combing through each sentence trying to figure out what it was that earned him such a reaction.

“You dare?” Dream spits. “You dare to know how I feel? You dare to claim that you know me? To know my heart so?”

Hob blinks. “Yes,” he replies, utterly confused at how this conversation has so drastically shifted. “Yes, I do.” Dream huffs as he tosses the napkin in his lap on the table and stands. Hob’s up on his feet as Dream stalks away, following after him. “Dream!” He calls after, weaving between the tables and the onlookers. He was suddenly glad that their waiter had been taking a while to get to them.

Dream storms out the doors into London’s pouring rain. He stomps down the sidewalk as Hob rushes after. For as thin as the man was, he walked faster than Hob would have expected. “Dream, Jesus, just-just wait, please!” He calls against the rain. His boyfriend’s steps stutter, and it gives Hob just enough time to close the distance. He grabs onto his shoulder and spins the other man to face him.

His inky black hair is soaked already, just seconds into the downpour. Hob doubts he’s much better. It sticks to his pale skin. The rain coats him completely, Dream’s eyeliner already beginning to run. Hob feels the flutter of adrenaline under his skin, afraid that one wrong move and he’ll lose this dramatic wet cat of a man that he so desperately loves. He needs to tackle his carefully, thoughtfully. Hob needs to treat Dream with a calm hand and a gentle touch.

“What are you so afraid of?”

Not what he should have said. Dream’s brows furrow, the scrunch of his nose and the sneer of his lips already beginning to paint his face. Hob tightens his grip on his shoulder, his other hand moving to hold Dream’s wrist. Dream tugs, but Hob doesn’t relent. He stares into Dream’s reddened eyes as he speaks.

“We’ve been dating for six months now. Today’s our anniversary, in case you didn’t know. And maybe I don’t know you completely, but I feel like I’ve got a pretty damn good grasp on you. I know that you hate the mornings, not because it’s early, but because your favorite bookshop doesn’t open until ten. I know that you take your coffee with more sugar and milk in it than actual coffee, but you’ll drink it black in the presence of others because you think it looks better. I know you choose each word you speak with such a meticulous nature than I can’t even begin to fathom because words are important and they mean a lot to you. I know you worry about the amount of bread the pigeons and ducks in the park eat, which is why you always make sure to get the special feed mix from the farm supply shop, even though it’s a half hour drive to get to. I know that you overthink each action you take because you’re afraid of how I’ll react. And I know, from tonight, you think that if you push me away first, then you think it might not hurt as bad as if I pushed you away instead.

“But guess what, Dream? I’m not letting you go. Not if you don’t want me to. Not if you love me even just a sliver as much as I love you. Cause I do. I love you, Dream. Have since that day you first walked up to me. Told you that. It hasn’t changed. If anything, I’ve just fallen even harder for you since. So you can yell at me, you can push me away, but I’ll still be here. Forever loving you. Just like I promised you six months ago.”

Dream stares at him, the anger falling from his face and morphing into a pained expression as Hob talks. The adrenaline has started to fade from his veins, leaving Hob tired and shaky. Dream doesn’t say a word, he just stares and with each passing second, fear begins to creep in. Is this how it was going to end? Six months in and that’s it, all because Hob dared to say he understood the man in front of him.

Then lips are on his and there’s a pair of hands clinging to the flaps of his jacket, pulling him ever closer. Hob melts into the kiss, his hands falling to Dream’s waist. It’s an awkward kiss, their noses are jammed against each other, but his body is warm against Hob’s and he’s holding him close and Hob hasn’t lost Dream. That’s the most important thing.

They part, panting against each other in the pouring rain. Dream’s icy blue eyes peer into Hob’s. He’s so close. He can make out all the individual lines of color in Dream’s irises. He can see rough edges of his eyeliner and the bits of mascara that cling to his lashes. He is a work of art, not that Hob’s ever thought otherwise, but here, as the golden glow of the restaurant’s lights reflect against the trails of tears and raindrops against his pale skin, Hob wishes he could take a picture and keep it forever.

“You are a ridiculous man, Robert Gadling. Impertinent. Foolish,” Dream whispers against his lips. “You could have anyone.”

“I could,” Hob replies. He moves one hand up, cupping Dream’s cheek. He rubs his thumb across the chilled skin. “But I want you.”

“A terrible choice,” Dream says, kissing him once more. Hob’s eyes drift shut as he loses himself to the warmth of soft lips dancing with his own. They’ve a long way to go, Hob thinks to himself. But he’s a hopeful man and a determined one. And he plans to spend as many lifetimes with this ridiculous man in his arms as he possibly can.

[room-surprise]

Dungeon Meshi Anime Review, Season 2, Episode 19 review

Izutsumi arrives! And Marcille has a nightmare.

This is an interesting episode but I know my spouse and I had desperately hoped that they would re-organize things somehow. Marcille's plot in this feels painfully tacked on and unrelated to Izutsumi's introduction, and the concept of the nightmare is so good, it could have easily been expanded to be an entire episode on its own. I wish they'd done that. They could have paired Izu's intro with the ice golem story to have one all-Izutsumi episode and then one all-Marcille episode... alas.

Those are changes I would have LIKED to see, but here's some changes I didn't like:

(MAJOR MANGA AND ANIME SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!!)

Trigger removed Laios' mother's only speaking line in the manga. It would have taken SO LITTLE to have someone read this single sentence, and removing it, in my opinion, has a negative impact on the story as a whole.

It SOUNDS like a generic thing when she asks Laios "When will you give us grandchildren?" But this is actually really important. Laios is afraid of being forced to make a family and participate in society. This is unusual because he's a man, most men in a historic time period of this don't really care about such things, but Laios is so afraid of it, it's a recurring nightmare!

This is also why he acted so weird seeing a loving father/baby scene in the magic paintings chapter. He hated seeing a father talk about how much they love their baby.

Laios is named after a story about murdering your children before they can hurt you. Like an Oedipus Complex supposedly means that a son wants to have sex with his mother, a Laios Complex means a man wants to kill his sons. Kui did not pick this name and then have Laios repeatedly be uncomfortable with children, marriage and fatherhood for no reason.

Obviously Trigger didn't make any of these connections and so they didn't think it was necessary for Laios' mom to speak this line out loud, but I vehemently disagree.

This is similar to my beef with them removing Yarn Floke's only dialog in the story and removing her from the scene with the Island Governor. That moment told us that Mr. and Mrs. Floke were equal partners, and now anime watchers assume she's just his wife who doesn't do anything. That sucks.

The addition of paintings of Marcille's father in the nightmare. Woof. I really don't care for this, if they wanted to do it i would have preferred it if they'd obscured the paintings somehow so it wasn't obvious that Marcille's father wasn't an elf.

I think this makes the later reveal of her half-elf status WAY less surprising.

Also, in the manga, the complete silence around her father created a strong subtext that Marcille's mother was her only parent that mattered. They could still accomplish this but I think it won't be as shocking.

People reading the manga probably thought "her dad was an elf and he died young and that traumatized her" (this is what Laios assumes I'm sure)

People watching the anime will think "her dad was a tall-man and his natural death of old age is what traumatized her" which is true, but they aren't supposed to actually know that yet...

Overall the episode was good aside from these issues. I liked that the nightmare sequence was in black and white, and the transition to color at the end was spectacular and very impactful... But part of me wishes they had done something else to differentiate the nightmare state from the normal animation. The black and white was good, but almost too subtle because the DM palette is already so desaturated.

[7grandmel]

Rip of the Week: 01/07/2024

Barreltr​ü​ckung of Doom

Season 8 Featured on: The Joke​-​Explainer 7000​™​'s Highest Quality Rips: Sunrise

Ripped by Madinstance

Tentative rip name: KNUCKLES (Smaragdwächter)

I pondered long and hard about this post, of what rip to make it about - I'm sort of back in the groove of things after my break, and I'm happy to see people are enjoying the graudally-increasing trickle of variety posts already, but I also feel as if I'm still regaining my footing in how to pick these rips for the blog. Alas, amidst all the requests and the all-time classics, I do inevitably hold recency bias close to my heart - bias you've already seen with rips like Last Freight-train Night, and that rears its head once again with Barreltr​ü​ckung of Doom. Because no matter what happens to me or the blog, I am but merely a Sonic fan, an Undertale enjoyer, and an absolute CONNOISSEUR for Madinstance's work. The madlad's done it again.

Like, look - I've featured the guy so many times before, I've featured Undertale music on here so many times more than even that, blah blah, blah blah...can you sincerely blame me for picking this one? Madinstance has been featured on here plenty for their incredible arrangements like M-O-O-G City and Thwâmpröck Desert, and I've always sort of taken them as the kind of ripper who puts their heart and soul into rips of games and music that they genuinely just care tons about, most evident with their Minecraft tributes like Fell From a High Place (Reprise). But lately it feels as if that view may have been wrong - or Madinstance is just growing as a ripper to where they're becoming willing to take on any arranging project so long as it sounds cool. Honestly though, I can't blame them with a concept as sick as this - meshing together prototype Carnival music from a Genesis Sonic game with Undertale boss music is the kind of lunatic concept that I don't know how one comes up with but also wouldn't be able to help myself to pursue.

There have been a lot of times where I've worried that I've covered too *much* Undertale music for the blog...but the more I sit on it, the more I realize just how core Undertale's music is to both SiIva's viewers and its rippers. Undertale blew up just a short few months before the SiIvaGunner channel itself did, and its fans have thus grown in almost direct parallel with SiIvaGunner's own fans - and on top of that, Toby Fox is the exact kind of online meme freak that SiIvaGunner itself attracts the most. Is it any surprise that we've had banging Undertale arrangements on SiIva like Hoopache, SUNGORE, and indeed Madinstance's very own Fell From a High Place (Reprise), since the very beginning of the channel, from just about every one of the team's rippers? Undertale is endlessly beloved, and moreover - endlessly versatile for arrangements, its leitmotifs and melodies so well known as to becoming a series of online anthems all in their own rights.

Compared to the more popular tunes like Megalovania and Death By Glamour, it feels as if ASGORE doesn't get as much attention from remixers and rippers. And perhaps that was part of what made me fall head over heels in love with Barreltr​ü​ckung of Doom right from the moment go - it shows such a profound respect and understanding for not just the original ASGORE theme, but the iconic Bergentrückung prelude that introduces the battle, here weaving the two together damn seamlessly in the rip's intro. It's immensely impressive just how atmospheric and intense the rip still sounds despite, again, it's baseline track being the borderline juvenile carnival music used in Sonic 3's recently-unearthed prototype versions, a series of cheerful clapping samples introducing the track yet never overriding the emotional sincerity of the melody leading the rip. I feel like the emotion in large part also just comes from how fucking cool of a sound Sonic 3's music in general has, a lead synth that sounds unlike anything else on the genesis playing a sort of melodic back-and-fourth with a second synth lead that sounds just as distinct yet far more chipper and bright, almost reminding me of something from Rivals of Aether...? The back-and-fourth feel is an amazing touch either way, is the point!

Barreltr​ü​ckung of Doom's final touch, of course, comes toward the finale, the section in which the original ASGORE battle theme takes a step back from its intensity to reflect, a calm in the midst of the storm. Madinstance brilliantly uses this interlude to throw a complete curveball that still fits the arrangement perfectly: using samples and sounds from the *finalized* Carnival Night Zone theme, the one created by Michael Jackson's soundteam, and featuring that distinct glass shattering sample from Jam. I talk about escalation in rips a fair bit on here, but it wasn't as it the rip was in any need of it here anyway given how amazing the arrangement already was. It's just the sort of thing that pushes the rip from great to godlike, the kind of touch you'd mainly expect to see from a Sonic the Hedgehog superfan committed to their rip, akin to what MtH did with Youkoso Twinkle Park e. But again - perhaps, somehow, I've underestimated just how far Madinstance will go once they've landed on a concept they truly click with. Season 8 may well be the silly season in many ways, but it's all too clear that each one of the team's rippers are growing more powerful by the day.

[kamisatomay018]

My Saviour: Part 3

Very fluff, a little slow burn but signifies the start of something special!

Enjoy<3

Ayato led you both outside into the back gardens of your estate, and there was an awkward silence between you two, which he decided to break. “Now that we’re alone Lady Hiragi, you can feel free to ask me anything you wish. Judging by your silence and the hesitation in your eyes, I suspect something is wrong..”

You were shocked at how he managed to see right through you, as you looked around a little nervously, afraid that the guards of your estate would eavesdrop and report back to your parents. “I..don’t think this would be the perfect opportunity Lord Kamisato..”

“You needn’t worry about anyone eavesdropping my lady, I made sure we would be left alone for our discussion.” He looked at you reassuringly, and in his lavender eyes you sensed warmth and comfort, something you were never given before. You nodded and to his dismay, you left his arm, stepping ahead to face the endless ocean.

“Then I will not sugarcoat my words Lord Kamisato. I request you to be completely honest with me. Why do you wish to marry me? Is it because Ayaka told you of my situation? As grateful as I am that you would try to save me from my inevitable fate, I do not think it is fair for you to lead a life with a woman you married out of force.”

Ayato had already expected you to say this, and your doubts were understandable. After all, you both had never met, and Ayaka indeed had informed him of your situation. So he decided to be completely honest with you, standing beside you while facing the waters of Inazuma, he spoke calmly with absolutely no hesitation in his voice. “It is indeed true that my sister informed me of your troubles and your unfortunate situation Lady Hiragi. However, I am not being forced to marry you, nor am I doing this just to save you from this wretched household. My decision to marry you comes from my heart, from my feelings for you, which I can say with complete confidence, are very genuine.”

You looked at him, his words confusing you even more. “But we have never met each other, how did you gain feelings for me?” He chuckled softly, looking into your eyes tenderly, making sure you knew that he was being very genuine right now. “My sister has spoken about you endlessly, and through her I got to know how selfless, kind and pure your heart is. The first time I saw your photograph, I was enchanted by your beauty, by your smile and your demeanour. All this while I had been searching for an opportunity to travel to Ritou in order to meet you, but alas my position as the Commissioner did not allow that. Tell me Lady Hiragi, how could I simply stand aside and watch the only woman who captured my eye get married to another noble?”

You were left speechless after listening to Ayato’s words. He liked you? Moreover he was willing to spend the rest of his life with you? Somewhere you felt guilty for you did not reciprocate his feelings; at least not yet. You were foreign to the concept of love, and although you knew that Ayato’s presence seemed to make your heart flutter, you were not quite sure of your feelings. You had only met him today after all. “Forgive me my lord…I..I don’t feel that way yet..”

He smiles softly, and although a little melancholy is hidden behind it, he appreciates your honesty and was prepared for such a response. “I am aware my lady; but I request you to give me a chance. A chance to show you how you deserve to be treated, a chance to make you happy, a chance to give you the love of a real family…”

You looked at him again, not knowing what you had done to deserve this amount of care from the Yashiro Commissioner himself. “Are you absolutely certain that you wish to marry me Lord Kamisato? What if I’m not good enough to be the wife of the Yashiro Commissioner?” Ayato smiled sweetly, stepping closer to you as he gently cupped your cheek. His touch felt so safe, so warm that you found yourself unknowingly leaning into it. “It matters not my lady, for I know that you are perfect to be the wife of Kamisato Ayato..”

You looked into his eyes, as the impact of those words settled into your mind. It was Ayato that mattered the most, not the Yashiro Commissioner. It was Ayato that needed the love, not the mask that he put on every time he had to handle the duties of his clan. You understood that he wanted you to focus on his real self, and not his noble identity. You smiled shyly, looking down as you made your mind. “Then I give you my word that I’ll try to give you all the happiness and perform all the duties of a wife..”

He shook his head, gently lifting your chin up. Archons, he was so handsome that you could stare at him all day without getting tired. “Being my wife does not mean you are going to be my responsibility my lady. Being my wife would make you my equal, my other half, my partner for the rest of my life. You will have no duties, you will have your own will, your own voice. You can be rest assured that in the Kamisato estate, you will be given the treatment of a queen.”

You felt your lips part in shock, as he once again left you completely speechless. He was so different than the other noblemen you had ever seen or heard of. You knew that you would never find a man like him, and that he would manage to make you fall head over heels in love with him very soon. Your smile widened, and Ayato finally got a glimpse of that dimpled smile his sister would speak so fondly of. “then it would be my greatest honour to be your wife Lord Kamisato..”

Ayato smiles happily at your words, placing a chaste kiss on your forehead, a sign of respect, love and endearment. “Call me Ayato my lady..” your heartbeat accelerated as your eyes closed to feel that soft kiss on your forehead. It was the first time you had felt such love and warmth, and your heart craved even more. “You can also address me by my name, or any other name you wish to give me Ayato..”

He chuckles at your words, his lavender eyes carrying a hint of mischief “whatever name I wish hm? Then how about my Daarin?” (Darling in Japanese) you felt your cheeks flush at his teasing, mumbling shyly “I don’t mind..”

Ayato smiled even more, gently holding your hand, intertwining your fingers together as both of you watched the waves crash gently against the shore. He felt true happiness with you, and he was determined to make you fall in love with him. This was the beginning of a new life, this time, with you by his side.

[ctcomix]

DYNAMO HEROES HERO WATCH ISSUE #1

22/11/24 - Prologue & Chapter 1 Retrospective

Hello! My name is Andrew and I’m the creator of a webcomic called Dynamo Heroes! Recently the first chapter of the comic ‘The Medallion’ finished uploading onto Webtoon and Tumblr, and I wanted to take a moment to look back on the past few months. I’ll also be showcasing my favourite comments and dropping random lore and doodles cos why not. Mostly I’m gonna dump a load of thoughts I’ve had lately!

Random Thoughts

WHAT THE HECK - 30 subs in three months on webtoon??? Won’t lie, I thought that I’d get little to none during the first arc, or at least the first few chapters. Maybe my dreams of getting 50 subs by next summer will actually happen?? My overall goal is 100 subs altogether so!!!! It’s happening!!!

Oh, I wanted to clear up some things about the comic’s structure cos i’ve planned out a good chunk of the story. This first ‘arc’ is about 10 chapters long, and most of the comic’s arcs are about 10-20 chapters long with the longest written so far being Arc 8 with 19 chapters. As of this newsletter, I’m in the middle of writing Arc 9, and the last chapter I finished writing was chapter 131 pfff

This is prose written btw - not like comic script which is a format I’ve looked into before, but prose writing is just easier for me to adapt into comic since I can really go into the character’s headspace and do appropriate expressions and body language.

Also! I found this old photo of working on the chapter back in 2022, feat. Sushi

CHAPTER ONE THOUGHTS

The Medallion (and Prologue) is done and out there, and I have a lot of regrets… I mean, I’m kidding - I’m just a bit shook by the artwork quality. In case you missed on that one random post I did on Tumblr at like page 22 or so, a majority of these pages were created over a year or two ago - especially the prologue which i worked on in 2021… when I decided I had a large enough backlog (about 150 pages) I had gotten SO much better at art and creating comics, so I decided to redraw the Prologue, which the original looked SO bad compared.

Original Prologue:

New Prologue:

Yeah, I'm glad a redrew it lol. I also redrew the first scene of chapter one (pages 17 to 21), and wanted to redo a few more pages, but my partner convinced me not to so I can actually upload the dang thing… This comic has been in production for at least three years after all. If I just redrew all the pages again, it would NEVER see the light of day. Truthfully, I was procrastinating. I was scared of posting.

Alas, here we are. Sam has the medallion and Chester (Puppet) is being difficult about the whole thing. There’s not really much more I can say, the story hasn’t really got going yet. I can say though, that you can probably tell I was so obsessed with Chester while writing this arc lol. Also Circe. I love Circe.

Comments

Of course, I have to shoutout the first ever comment Dynamo Heroes received:

‘Request: please give Sam prehensile hair powers please?@@’

Thank you, Nable#. Your comment was truly a gift. Unfortunately, Sam will not be getting prehensile hair powers, but that sounds like a cool concept! I’ll definitely consider it for a future character!!

Next up I want to shoutout and thank brotheboss for being such a BRO and leaving a comment on almost every page so far - I’m always looking forward to hearing your thoughts, even if it’s just ‘uh oh.’ (that being said, if you’re reading this brotheboss, please don’t feel pressured to comment! Comment and read if and when you wanna :)) I think my favourite brotheboss comment in this first chapter was:

‘puppets ponytail goes crazy ngl’

This comment gave me a crazy big smile. It DOES go crazy doesn’t it? Thank you!

Finally, I'd like to thank Dr Everlasting for the shoutout to a TV show i’d never heard of called ‘The Greatest American Hero’ - I’m definitely gonna check it out, looks super charming!

Thoughts of the Future

I’m going to try keeping this whole newsletter short, obvs i haven't been able to stop yapping so far, so I’ll fill this section with sections I want to add to the newsletter once the comic perhaps has more of a following. I’m sure whoever’s reading this rn isn’t that invested in myself and this comic to keep reading past the first couple sentences, so if you’ve made it this far thank you! Or you’re my partner, to which I say hi honey : P

A section I’d like to add maybe is a script to screen type comparison - where I compare a section of the original prose to one of the pages and explore my thought process with changes and creation and such. I’m not so sure about adding this one, we’ll see.

Another section I’d love to do someday is popularity polls - y’know like in shonen jump? This comic is going to get SO many characters and I’d love love looove to see who’s peoples favourites from arc to arc, or like favourite moments/scenes etc. I think it’d be super fun! I think I’d like to hold a popularity poll when we get to 100 subs!! Let's make it happen!!

CONCLUSION

Ummmm,, that’s it! For now! I’m gonna be writing another one of these at the end of chapter 2 so hope to see you there! Thanks!!! To end off here's some random out of context teases of chapter 2:

Thanks again! Have a good day! TODAY'S STATS:

Views: 2179 Subs: 34 Likes: 226

[nightimedreamersworld]

20 questions for fic writers

Big thanks @artsyunderstudy and @prettygoododds @confused-bi-queer @bookish-bogwitch tagging me in this! And to everyone else who's tagged me in a tumblr meme recently. It's been a while since I've done one of these.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

33!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Around 370k, but of those about 40k aren't mine. So in reality, something like 330k?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Only Carry On! I don't have the attention span for more of one at a time lol

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. How I wonder what you are aka baby fic

2. Mess is mine aka secret dating fic

3. Every little helps aka snickers fic

4. You and I will not be shaken aka huddling for warmth fic

5. From across the room aka my FIRST fic

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I don't 😭 which makes me feel guilty and ungrateful, but alas. Every time I've tried to in the past, I'd run out of steam after half a dozen comments or so. Don't get me wrong, I love comments, they fuel me etc etc. Replying just makes me unreasonably anxious

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Technically it's Love of Fate because it doesn't have an ending. It was supposed to be a prologue to something longer that would eventually have a happy ending, and that I simply never wrote lol

That said, the true angstiest ending is probably my All there's left is a ghost of you series - same moment, one from Simon's pov, the other from Baz's. Set between carry on and wayward son, which tells you everything about why it's here :) (Although arguably, those are hopeful endings. Kinda.)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Almost everything I write has a happy-ish ending, but the one indisputable happiest ending is probably How I wonder what you are

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not necessarily hate, but one time I did get someone mocking my fic for a mistake I made. Which, like, I deserved, for straying so far out of my comfort zone lol

Anyway. I have upped my research game since, so. Lesson learned?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes! The kind I want to read lol

Seriously, though, I tend to write weird stuff I can't find elsewhere. Someone once mentioned there's little mirror sex fic in the fandom, and BAM! I got the itch to write one. I've also tried my hand at web cam sex, body modification, and... [reads smudged handwriting] cemetery sex?

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven't yet, but never say never, right? Although I'm much more likely to just write AUs instead. As in, take the world of the original, chuck the characters and just replace them with snowbaz lol

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Probably not? I mean. I hope so lol

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. I've thought about doing it myself, but there's roughly any engagement with fics in Portuguese on AO3, so it doesn't feel worth the trouble

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Birthday man! Though I might be open to it if a) someone with a compatible style is interested, and b) I find some free time to actually write lol

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Do I even need to say anything? (It's snowbaz)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Sigh. It's probably Let your colours bleed, because It's been 3 years, so I've just... sort of grown past the story? Which makes me sad, because I still like the concept, I just can't connect to anymore

There are a handful other WIPs still hanging on my ao3, but I still have hope for them.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I like writing plot! And also actions scenes. And banter, maybe a bit too much lol

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The beginning of a fic. And also the ending. And also the mid-

Seriously though, I find that I tend to be either too verbose or too succinct when I don't know exactly what I'm trying to say. Like, I either charge through it and the thing falls flat, or I drag it on for several paragraphs that amount to barely anything. Hopefully, I can mitigate that with the power of editing and beta readers

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I think it's cool depending on context! Like, is this a situation in which this character would simply switch to another language? Also, why?

I haven't done it yet, though.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Take a guess. (It was actually Harry Potter)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Dance Like a Flame! My specialest baby. My little darling. My magnum opus.

I'll jump at literally any chance to talk about this fic, so beware.

Phew! Can't believe I actually answered one of these for once... now, I'm pretty sure almost everyone has done this already, but I'm going to tag a few people anyway just so this doesn't get lost in the abyss

@palimpsessed @captain-aralias @cutestkilla @larkral @aristocratic-otter @hushed-chorus @whatevertheweather @ivelovedhimthroughworse @whogaveyoupermission

[ahmedmootaz]

Hello hello! I hope you're doing well, and thanks once more for answering my inquiries! As I write this before I go to bed, I've resolved myself towards practicing my pixel art skills to try and capture a possible moment in the possible Adventures in Motherhood timeline I envisioned (if that's ok) As for my question this time around, I want to ask you: if you had to rewrite AiP, what would you change? (If nothing, did you have a favorite part / "aha!" moment while writing AiP?)

Dear hncdmnfr,

And welcome once again! I remain quite happy to see your asks here and there!

Oh, that does make me quite happy to hear, but please, there's no need to over-exert yourself if you don't really want to! Otherwise, who am I to stop you? If anything, I am honoured that a passing AU of an AU seems to have caught your interest as much as it did! So please, feel free to picture the timeline you envision however you wish.

As for the question...I'm not sure what I would change in particular, as I am quite happy with how AiP progressed thus far, but if I would change ONE thing, it has to be my writing schedule. Alas, I take waaay too long between Chapters now, much to my chagrin, as I do wish to wrap up AiP sometime soon-ish, though that seems to be a distant dream as of now, alas.

As for the next part, it has spoilers for AiP, and since these asks seem to attract some attention in the main tag: To anyone who has yet to read AiP: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

As for the favourite part I had in mind, I suppose it has to be the Sweeper Saga. I came up with it waaaay back in May 2021, and while some parts of AiP were added by necessity to strengthen the narrative or to prevent the character development from seeming too much like heel-face turns and make it more 'organic' in a way, the Sweeper Saga and the confrontation with Carmen was the part I had in my mind for almost a year when the whole Saga was done, alongside the parts with X and the whole of "To Where Everyone Else Waits". I suppose the 'aha!' I had in mind was how I figured out that I can merge the Carmen segment with the Sweeper Saga, because they were both separate in my mind at their conception.

And once again, thank you for those very nice questions! It's always nice to answer them. Until next time, then, stay safe, be well, and see ya'!

[scoobydoodean]

The only issue I've ever had with DeanLisa is that it reads too much to me like the "I've met you only a handful of times and I wanna spend the rest of my life with you" ala Disney Princess + Prince trope, and I just can't stand that trope. That's just a personal preference though

But I've never had a problem with Lisa herself - I think she's really fucking cool actually, and that she really did care about Dean. I think they both were reaching for an ideal, a dream, and they found solace in each other, but the circumstances that led them together (the second/third/fourth) time were not conducive to a lasting relationship.

I think it's more biphobic to be super anti DeanLisa tbh? (as a concept, not saying you have to ship them). Bc it's denying that part of Dean, like people really wanna dive deep into Dean's queerness in the way he interacts with men, but it's incredibly biphobic to then deny a relationship he had with a woman that meant a lot to him. That relationship doesn't take away from his queerness, he's still bi even while he's with a woman. Sure, I can see the argument behind comp cishet relationships and how that's bi/homophobic, but I think in this situation it's more nuanced than that? There's so many factors that lead into Dean going to Lisa (mainly feeling completely abandoned by everyone..which...he more-or-less was, be it on purpose (Cas) or not (Sam)) after such incredible trauma, he's obviously going to go to someone who he can find comfort in, that he already knows, who cares for him and he cares for back...I don't think that's comp cishet

I guess I lived in my own little SPN bubble bc I had no idea people hated her so much until fairly recently, as I started seeing posts and stumbling upon old fics where she's written as a nasty bitch for NO good reason

I appreciate your thoughts on them, tbh bc I feel like I don't ever see people talk about them or it's in a very disparaging way

Yeah I agree with you. I have no problem with people just saying "I don't like it. It just isn't my thing. It's boring, it doesn't appeal to me, I do not vibe with it, I like another ship better, he should have gone to Cassie instead, I don't think the storyline ever should have been done because of x,y, z" etc. What is sooo weird to me is people who can't live with just saying they don't like it and have to make the fact that they don't like it some kind of moral issue and/or talk about it in a way that ends up just displaying their own (internalized or externalized) biphobia and misogyny (edit: and even ableism—because I have seen that one quite a bit too).

I have seen people say:

Lisa and Dean are both used up because they've had so much sex with other people and therefore the relationship is nothing more than an expression of their mutually low standards, where simultaneously neither of them are good enough for the other because they have had too much sex. (Which was then back tracked to Dean being the only one who is all used up from all the sex he has had, because we wouldn't want to be misogynists).

Dean and Lisa's relationship is conservative christian (as someone raised in a conservative christian home, I can assure you that is not the case).

Dean and Lisa is a heteronormative relationship and is therefore bad. That is... not only very debatable, but based on what? Why? What is so "heteronormative" about it? I'll pay someone $50 if they can tell me without being biphobic, homophobic, or misogynist, or basically line for line describing a post-canon or AU destiel fic they’ve recced before just replacing Lisa with Cas. (Having a home is heteronormative? Parenting a child? Living together? What is it? I can never get a straight (heh) answer.)

Dean/Lisa is biphobic. Again... why? Because Dean is with a woman? Do... do we know what bisexual means? Are we sure?? Because it sounds like—frankly—the queer community yet again being one of the more biphobic communities around, and saying bi people are only interesting and acceptable when they are in same sex romances, and otherwise they are heteronormative and bad and wrong and boring. Which is a great thing to make bi people on the internet (whether you count yourself among them or not) read. Like. I think the way we interpret many characters who are not explicitly and openly bisexual as bisexual has also in some sense poisoned people into treating bi-ness as like... an exciting accessory, instead of a sexuality. Which is again—not how bisexuality works, but is how people on Tumblr often seem to treat bisexuality when they act like it is an accessory being thrown on or taken off by a character. "Well Dean isn't wearing his bisexuality accessory right now since he's in a 'het' romance, so he is not shiny enough and I am not interested in him". It's just fucking weird and it makes me uncomfortable.

Also, I don't know why this comes as a shock to some people, but calling something "het" is not inherently an argument proving that thing is bad and wrong, and suggesting that it is is also fucking weird.

Edit: Another one I forgot—"Dean is messed up/'damaged' therefore Lisa should never have allowed him in her home". Because we think people with PTSD shouldn't be shown kindness by people who don't have PTSD, I guess, and people without PTSD should avoid people who have PTSD at all costs.

Like. It is no secret that I utterly despise Sam/Amelia. But you know what I don't do? I don't go around calling it heteronormative, or applying my weird conservative christian leftovers about sexual purity to the relationship, or saying Sam was too messed up in the head and a "normal" woman never should have allowed someone so "damaged" to be in her life, in order to shout from the roof tops how "problematic" it is for them to be together. I just say "I don't like it because Amelia is not an enjoyable character to me. I find her extremely awkward and uncomfortable and I don't like the way she talks to Sam and don't understand the romance."

[m1ckeyb3rry]

LMAO actually I ended up enjoying it a LOT more than expected it’s lowkey not like a genre I’d typically get involved it but it was surprisingly kinda light and entertaining?? It’s called fragaria memories it’s (according to wiki) a multimedia project by Sanrio LMAO they mainly have stuff on YouTube like voice dramas and little Q and As and music (???) which is also why I said very different from what I typically consume LOL Although I’ll admit it’s not super deep or anything but I haven’t seen any insane fans either so I’m kinda enjoying the chill aspects of it!! I’ve also always liked Sanrio too so that probably helps but yeah if you decide to give it a try hit me up!! Made me laugh a bit I’m ngl and I think the concepts kinda cute

LMAOAAO that’s what makes it so funny it’s so ridiculous we definitely watched it for the memes and got semi invested in the drama but the secondhand embarrassment was so bad I’d have to shut it off mid episode lowkey another no brain chill watch sort of thing I feel

YAYY CONGRATS!!! I almost forgot abt the carnivorous Pegasi ngl I’m looking forward to reading more about them than sae (#oppmoment)

YUKIIIIIII did him justice except he needs more screen time but omg SHIDOU??? I have not opened tiktok in awhile the editors are cooking fr but YESS omg so excited for the upcoming Barou goal

SHDHSHS I MISINTERPRETED THAT I THOUGHT YOU MEANT YOU WERE DROPPING A CHAPTER BOMB LMFAOOAAO HUT NOOO HOLLYHOCK YOU WILL BE MISSED BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN!!! Its ok gotta focus your efforts for the quality fics very understandable

- Karasu anon

ooh that sounds fun!! confession i actually never got into sanrio so i know like 0 lore or ANY of the characters 😓 my cousin had a huge hello kitty phase iirc but when i was that age i was into like paleontology and geology for some reason?? so i was always reading like textbooks and field guides and shit 😭 but a fun silly unserious fandom is always great to be in!! maybe it’s time i actually figure out who the characters are i feel like sanrio is such a popular thing online i’m behind the curve for not knowing abt it

ALSO WAIT SLIGHTLY OFF TOPIC BUT SOMEONE FINALLY MADE THE KARASU EDIT I MANIFESTED IN ONE OF OUR CONVOS A WHILE BACK idk if you saw it or not but here’s a link…bro i’m going to miss tik tok when it’s gone ong 😭💔

IT WAS CRAZYYY ngl whenever i get the adrien agreste comments on my stories i do laugh though they’re funny 🙂‍↕️ there’s so many iconic audios from miraculous i feel like it’s one of those things where everyone has heard smth from it

HAHAHA i keep writing more for my opps than my favs 😫 but i’ve been traveling the past few days so not much work was done alas however i’m hoping to finish soon because i haven’t posted any xreader content since the angel kaiser one shot in mid october 😰

yukimiya looked sooo good and him in the recent official art too?? with the flowers and whatnot…ugh he’s so handsome 😭 and YESSSS LESS THAN 24 HOURS UNTIL BAROU I’M SO HYPE LIKE SOOOO SOSOSO HYPE

LMAOOOO I’M SORRY FOR THE MISUNDERSTANDING 😔 i need to get through a request or two and then i have to write a one shot which i’ve planned and MANY people have been asking for + i think you will really enjoy before i need to get on updating the oaeu and pursuit as well as possibly something super secret and new (no promises) so hollyhock had to take one for the team unfortunately 😩 lots to do in the miraverse as you can see!! but it’s all very exciting and should be fun i hope

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

- I’m not imagining this as ‘cis man suddenly has a uterus mpreg’, I’m seeing Jack just sort of hanging out in Dean’s soul until he pops out Athena from Zeus style

- they found out about him bc Dean had a constant ringing in his ears for a few weeks- at first he thought it was just Stress about casifer/soul bomb/mom revival/sammy missing, but then when things calmed down and it didn’t go away he asked Cas to check it out and Cas was like. SHIT!!! lol the ringing was basically baby babble enochian style

- Dean’s immediately freaked out by the whole situation/worrying about what being a demon and having lucifer use his grace on him could have done during development while Cas is worrying about the whole ‘nephilim are abominations and heaven is absolutely going to want us dead again’ thing and it takes them like. almost a month to realize they aren’t on the same page lmfao. Cas obviously changes his mind eventually but its more ala ‘you changed me dean I cared because you cared’ instead of debatable baby brainwashing 

- kelly only died bc jack was an archangel baby! since he’s not in this version/dean’s not physically carrying him anyway it’s not a big deal, they’re just more worried about like. heavenly hitmen and friends. but dean’s like ‘heaven and hell always want us dead?’. lucifer gets interested when he finds out bc if his grace did effect jack he could use that for. some vague nefarious take over the world plan lmfao. OR maybe since he’s an archangel he noticed jack developing before any of the other angels did and tried to infect him with his grace on purpose, who knows

- Dean puts off telling Sam for a MULTITUDE of reasons but Sam eventually finds out because Cas mentions the baby in passing and Sam is like

- so that’s a whole thing for a while

- crowley, who tried and failed to baby trap dean less than six months ago, falling to his knees in despair, 

- look I don’t. Care about the apocalypse world storyline but that portal needs to open because the drama of the widower arc Needs to happen lol. it would be a much more explicit parallel to pre-series john, which would Hurt but also I do think would help dean clock his behavior a lot sooner than he did in canon. so jack’s still strong enough to accidentally do shit like that still

- no literally imagine tho Dean just watched Cas AND his mother die and then suddenly realizing the constant presence he’s been feeling for months is gone and at first he panics that the baby’s dead, then Sam calls for him and he realizes the baby’s alive and needs help, only to head over and see that the baby is already a fully grown adult bc he didn’t feel safe enough to be a child. three strike combo critical hit Dean’s literally just gonna throw himself into the fire. 

- so Dean’s still depressed and checked out for a bit at first but there’s more of a ‘well it’s not like he needs me’ angle to it than a hatred angle. he eventually snaps out of the apathy stage of grief but by that point to Jack whenever Dean tries to teach him something or bond over something he thinks it’s bc Dean thinks he’s incapable or something which hurts his feelings. partly a winchester pride thing and partly a (reasonably) childish fear that if Dean doesn’t trust him that means he’s a burden yadayada. so once Cas is back Jack goes to him for every little thing, even though we know Cas is in and out and Dean’s more of a daily presence which hurts DEAN’S feelings bc now he thinks he messed up so monumentally that Jack doesn’t care about him at all and it’s just messy and upsetting for everyone 

- also the concept of Cas of all people having to play family therapist is really funny 

I love jack so so much he's perfect but tbh I do think it would've worked much more with the show if he was a destiel baby instead of lucifer's. and I'm not just saying that as a shipper or whatever I mean narratively it would've been a lot cleaner- and actually, I think it would've been super funny to no-homo them creating a baby together, like, literally all they would have to do is say "oh, when cas rebuilt dean after hell he accidentally left some grace tangled in his soul, and every time he's healed him since then it's been growing stronger until a nephilim was born". like yes the studio is homophibic etc etc but all the jokes they'd make about dean being spiritually pregnant would be very funny for me personally.

but ANYWAY, jack's story gets messy and convoluted and I think this would've been like...a simple fix. them worrying about him going dark side could be because they're worried how demon!dean and lucifer!cas affected him in development, the show LOVES bloodline drama, chuck's wanting abraham and issac 2.0 would've worked better this way, dean's storyline with him would be improved, bc rather than 'oh no I slowly but surely emotionally adopted the antichrist' like I think he would've had an easier time clocking his john-behavoir if it wasn't a question whether he was jack's dad or not. plus last time dean actively raised a kid he went to great lengths to keep the supernatural away from him, so it'd be interesting to see how he handles a kid he CANT possibly hide from this part of his life. it would make more sense why michael wanted jack as a vessel- yes obviously he wanted the nephilim power boost but also having him as part of the winchester bloodline, making him a PERFECT vessel he doesn't have to worry about burning up would add a lot. we could also use this argument for why lucifer is so interested in him if anyone actually liked that plotline in season 14 lmao. we know chuck hated cas and dean's relationship, could you imagine if he checked in and found out they made an unauthorized baby together💀 like that really would've given better context for why he hates jack so much. cas wouldn't need that whole weird brainwashing arc to wanna protect unborn jack, PLUS it could've been an interesting source of angst for him- he feels like he's failed once again, creating an abomination and putting dean in danger, but also still loves jack immensely. it'd be so good! also imagine how fucking stressed out heaven would be to find out a mini castiel is on the way. they wouldn't even wanna exploit that kid for power they'd be preemptively treating the headaches they know they're gonna get lmfao.

also. the casting directors literally put jensen and misha into a face morph app and cast the first actor they could find that matched the results. which would've made more sense if,,,,he was just Theirs. the comedy of dean and cas making a baby before either of them managed to admit their feelings to each other would be more fun then the "dude adopted a kid and pawns him off on his unwilling roommate's all the time and they eventually warm up to the kid" storyline we actually got. we also could've replaced some of the jack-dean angst from the show with "dean wants to connect more with jack but he feels shut out whenever cas is around bc he can't relate to any angel stuff so obviously jack's going to cas for help more!", which I think would be interesting!! how AWFUL dean and cas would feel that jack didn't feel safe enough to be a baby. dad!sam is still in full swing but he cares for jack right off the bat instead of trying to use him for his powers at first. lily sunder talking about how cas killed her kid bc he thought it was a nephilim and dean, who's already fully aware he's (spiritually) knocked up by cas is like 👹 inch resting cas-tee-elle tell me more. mary having a 'my baby has a baby' crisis. cas insisting jack looks nothing like him is a running joke but then at some point he explains its bc jack's 'true form' looks just like dean's soul....

ALSO- in a show where, canonically, the very first act of free will was cas falling in love with dean...the physical manifestation of that defeating chuck and taking his place as god? come ON.

[onehunnit]

March Comebacks/Debuts that I Caught!* *in no particular order, non-exhaustive, and all songs were released between March 1st and March 30th.

Playlist

Lighthouse by Tempest: At first I was like 'ugh, boring bg song tomato tomato" but I listened to it when I was not exhausted and I actually really enjoy it? Like its charming and has personality. To be clear my frame of reference for Tempest is Hyeongseop falling off his chair when meeting Taemin and Vroom Vroom. But this is so fucking cute I love it. More concepts like this actually…. BUT DONE WELL! However, this song is very forgettable…..

Body by Highlight: they said "SHAKE YOU BODY YOU BODY YOUR BODY YOUR BODY RIGHT" and I DID! I like this song it feels like summer. However. The whistling in the chorus makes me wanna rip my hair out. I fr thought we left that back in the 2010s, alas.

Do Doom Chit by VVUP: do doom chit is actually a bit of a banger… ngl at first I was like "what." but she grew on me and with a QUICKNESS.

FRI(END)S by V: V come through w/ the vocals king!!!! This song is so cute and should have been a valentines day release. It's short, yes, but I don't think it needs to be more than it is. I do wish this wasn't a single though… this belongs as an interlude on a full length album sry!!!! Also reminds me of the 70s pop that spencer sutherland has on his music. Heyuyyy what a thought

HEYDAY by XODIAC: this would've gone triple platinum in my room circa 2017… Like with Lighthouse we need more of this concept well-executed. And for my ballad lovers out there WONDERFUL TONIGHT off the same mini is for you!!!!

Fresh by Daniel Jikal: Wish there were more variation his his flow and wasn't so predictable. There's nothing special here but there is always way to improve. This feels very… the mediocre 2018 rappers who were popping up all over the place. And that's okay!

Lucky by Hori7on: These nugu groups be working their asses off and when they do they make absolute bangers like this. I am not a fan of whistling but it actually accompanies the production well. Lucky and Body are brothers in arms fr. THE CHORUS BANGS SO HARD I CAN'T LIEEE. Even the chant hook is nice like, the composers/producers/arrangers were in their bag man. I can get over the whistles fr. This is like AJU NICE but for 5th gen.

Nectar by THE BOYZ: Boy groups this month decided to give us soft nostalgia pop BANGERS and ofc THE BOYZ did not disappoint. I love this trend, MORE PLEASE!!! Btw if you like this song you'll like HEYDAY and Lighthouse for sure….

BBB by Purple Kiss: The girls will always slay with their vocals and songs, but that chorus is… not it madames. Catchy as hell but man, when you got a song like Sweet Juice it's really fucking hard to keep it up. unfortunately this was a miss from them….

Rooftop by YooA: Yeah… she slayed. I know nothing about YooA or much about OH MY GIRL but she came out and did her little thing with this one. It's not a song i'll be playlisting but she did do her thing fr.

Fuego by THE NEW SIX: She had to grow on me. She is still trying to grow on me. She is not growing much admittedly. The rap after the first chorus barely salvages it for me. I think I've just listened too much to songs like this before and I'm tired of it. By no means is it bad just not for me, and that's okay.

12. Smoothie by NCT Dream: this song is just uh… very…. well 🤷🏾‍♀️ They did release it as their title!

Superwoman by UNIS: You know what? Solid debut. The afrobeats trend is not leaving for a bit i fear… And

Neuron by J.Hope ft Gaeko, yoonmirae: I will always be a fan on boom bap in kpop and by god did they boom and man did they bap. J-hope will forever be serving us good ass hiphop. BUT MOST OF ALL YOONMIRAE ON THIS TRACK I SAW AND I SCREAMED FR! man. i fucking love yoonmirae this feature took the cake for me.

Birth by ARTMS : I need this song tattooed on my brain this is the vibe i was expecting w/ NCT Dream's new release….. if i dare say it. But she is genuinely too short… PLEASE GIVE HER MORE TIME TO SLAY. What a wonderful ARTMS debut the loona girlies WILL keep killing it (and me)

Broken Hearts by AMPER&ONE: This is fun! But like with Fuego, she has a lot to do to grow on me.

Baddest Behavior by Tempest (jp debut): four minutes i crode 😭🙌🏾, i liked it enough to listen, but I'm more impressed at how they were able to make a 4 minute song so strong without making it feel like filler.

Wish You Hell by WENDY: She's a good song,,,, but is this a WENDY song? Think about that for me. I mean I still love it but this is WENDY we're talking about.

EENIE MEENIE by Chungha ft Hongjoong: MOTHER IS BACK!!!!! Chungha did NOT have to kill us with I'm Ready and she did not have to bury us in the grave with EENIE MEENIE not only is the song catchy as fuck w/ fun production omfg…. the hongjoong feature set it from awesome to SPECTACULAR bc that rap is soooo mind melting in how good it is delivered and 2 the flow is insane.

Good Girl by Candy Shop: The beat switch in at the end of the pre-choruses should have been kept for the chorus but they didn't?!?! literally why and what the fuck it would have ELEVATED the song so much. But this is classic alt/contemporary rnb. The modulation in the song is well-done and keeps it interesting but and they finally kept the beat for the end, at least. But why give us a taste of heaven to just go back into the regular chorus ahhhhhh.

[johnhardinsawyer]

The Door is Always Open

John Sawyer

Bedford Presbyterian Church

3 / 17 / 24 – Fifth Sunday in Lent

Matthew 18:15-22

Psalm 119:9-16

“The Door is Always Open”

(Wandering Heart – Week 5)

I have told this story before, but there was a woman in my former congregation.  We’ll call her “Doris,” because this was her name.  At the time, I was serving as the Associate Pastor of the church and I worked closely with a Head of Staff/Senior Pastor, named Jarred.  One day, after church, this woman who we will call “Doris,” because that was her name, went up to Jarred and said, “The next time you talk with John about his sermons, tell him that he pushes his glasses up too often on his nose.  Maybe he needs new glasses because they keep falling down and he has to keep pushing them up.”  

Now, consider – for a moment – that Doris did not come to me, asking after my glasses or the complexion of my oily nose upon which the glasses sat.  No, Doris went to Jarred who then came to me, forming this bizarre triangle of communication.  

If you spend any time learning about how groups of people work together, you might come across this concept of triangulation,  in which, I have a problem with someone but instead of talking with them, directly, about it, I go and share my frustrations with someone else who then goes and shares my frustrations with the person I’m frustrated with.  Does this sound confusing?  Yes, it does.  Does it sound unnecessary?  Yes.  Does this sound like something that has ever been done to you?  I’m willing to guess, yes.  Does it sound like something you and I have ever done to someone else?  Yikes!  Probably. . . ?  Alas, Doris moved away before I was able to address this matter directly with her.  Let’s just say that some things are. . . still unresolved.

In today’s reading from the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus teaches us about proper communication and healthy group dynamics.  We also learn that even when the group dynamics are not healthy, the door should always be left open for healing.  

The first part of today’s reading seems fairly straightforward.  Jesus starts by telling his disciples (which includes those of us who would seek to follow Jesus in our own lives) that, “if another member of the church sins against you. . .”  (Matthew 18:15). In the original language, Jesus is talking about someone who is as close to you as a sibling.  Jesus uses the word “brother” here, which implies a brother or sister in the faith who sins against you – someone who is part of the broader community of believers – someone in the household of disciples who harms you in some way.[1]  

Now, if you are new to church or think that everyone in church is super nice and nobody ever does anything to make anyone else feel bad, I’m sorry to shatter any illusions you might have.  Alas, we do not always live up to the ideals we profess.  There are any number of historical accounts, and books, and podcasts, and personal anecdotes about how people have been hurt by other people in the church.  In recent years, we have witnessed clergy abuse scandals, and churches torn apart by questions of sexual orientation and ordination, and marriage, and politics.  People can get hurt – physically, spiritually, emotionally – even at church.  Many of these hurt people might leave a particular congregation and never go back, or they might walk out of church-as-a-whole – the very idea of church or organized religion – and never come back.  In my mind, the church has a lot more confessing and repenting to do and a lot more relationships to heal.  

When it comes to healing relationships, Jesus tells us that the best kind of reconciliation happens face-to-face.  In today’s reading, there are the oft-quoted words of Jesus, which you heard earlier, “where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them.” (18:20)  I’ve always thought of these words in a, “whenever two or three people get together in Jesus’ name, Jesus is spiritually present and it’s all wonderful” sense.  Upon reflection though, I’m thinking yes, it is true that Jesus does bring wonder and joy in moments of fellowship and community, but also, “whenever two or three people – who do not agree or who have hurt one another – get together in Jesus’ name, Jesus is there among them and it ain’t easy. . . but Jesus is there, bringing grace to the table, even when the people who have gathered around that table are fresh out of grace for one another.”  

You know, after the presidential election of 2016, I preached a sermon right here that rubbed some people the wrong way.  I admit that I did not choose my words wisely in that emotionally charged time.  But I only heard about the negative response to my sermon through back channels and specific names were never shared with me.  There was one person, though, who did come to talk.  They walked right into my colleague Karen’s office to talk to her about me and my sermon.  It could have been another “Doris” situation, but Karen – who knew something about the dangers of triangulation – immediately pulled that person next door into my office and we spoke face to face.  It took such courage for them to speak their mind directly to me.  And what they had to say was not easy for me to hear. But, in that moment, I sensed so much grace – grace that didn’t come from the brave, though hurt, person sitting in front of me; grace that did not come from me, the person who heard some hard things, but grace that came from the Holy One who was present among us.  

To this day, whenever I see that person at church, I am so thankful for them and the lesson God taught me – through them – about how much power words can have, especially when they are spoken from the pulpit.  And I am so grateful for the grace that abounds when the truth is spoken – and heard – in love.  

This is what Jesus tells us to do.  Go directly to the person in question.  Or, take someone with you and go directly to the person in question – the person who harmed your sensibilities, your spirit, you body. . .  This can be so hard.  There are some people who don’t mind making others feel uncomfortable, but most of us would rather just let things slide or take the easier path.  And when we do take the easy path – we sidestep the truth that leads to healing.  As someone told me just the other day, there are times that we may have hurt someone without knowing, and we might never know unless they tell us.[2]

We need to take great care, though, because there are times – especially in this post-“Me-too” world – when it is important to acknowledge that someone should not – for their own safety and spirit – be in the same room as the person who hurt them.  

In just a moment, we will sing a hymn that includes the lyrics, 

For everyone born, a place at the table, abuser, abused, with need to forgive, in anger, in hurt, a mindset of mercy, for just and unjust, a new way to live.[3]

“Abuser, [and] abused, with need to forgive?”  You know, whenever we have sung this song over the past few years, we have left this verse out because. . . well, it’s too hard for many of us to wrap our minds around.  In a 2013 article on Patheos, called “When My Abuser is Welcome at the Table, I am Not,” the title says it all.  The author writes that if the church were to welcome the person who had previously assaulted the author then she, herself, would feel unwelcome.[4]  

How do we reconcile this, especially when – in today’s text – Peter asks Jesus, “How often should I forgive?  As many as seven times?” (18:21)  There are many who find it hard to forgive just once, much less seven times.  And yet Jesus says, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times.” (18:22)  Other ancient versions of this text have Jesus saying “seventy times seven” or “four-hundred ninety” times.  As one commentator writes, “Jesus’ response effectively knows no limits.”[5]  How many times should we forgive?  Jesus’ answer is “Infinite.”

But, before we throw up our hands and say, “Jesus, this is too much!” I think it is important to state several things:

First, God’s ability to forgive is far greater than our own human ability to forgive.  Remember, when Jesus is hanging on the cross, he prays, “Father, forgive them – the people who have put me here to suffer and die – for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34)[6]  God’s power to forgive and restore goes far beyond our own power or understanding.  And sometimes, as the song infers, the forgiveness that abusers need can only, in the end, come from God.  

Second, it is important for us to note that the church has some standards for what reconciliation looks like and it does not put the onus for forgiveness solely on the person who was abused.  You know, I don’t often quote from the Book of Order of the Presbyterian Church (USA), and when I do, I rarely quote from the part of the book that centers on church discipline, but the church has put procedures in place – including an internal court system – whose primary goals are, in part:  

• To honor God by making clear the significance of membership in the body of Christ;  • To preserve the purity of the church by nourishing the individual within the life of the believing community;  • To pursue and reveal the truth;  • To achieve justice and compassion for all participants involved;  • To correct or restrain wrongdoing in order to bring members to repentance and restoration;  • To uphold the dignity of those who have been harmed by offenses; • To restore the unity of the church by removing the causes of discord and division. . .[7]

Just so you know, the “church court system” is not a substitute for a civil or criminal court system – a crime is still a crime – but when Jesus tells his disciples in today’s scripture reading that they have the authority to “bind and loose,” he is telling them that they have the authority to set some standards for what communal life in the body of Christ should look like, based on prayerful discernment of the scriptures, and the example of Jesus, and the movement of the Holy Spirit.  

Today, when we sing the line, “abuser, abused, with need to forgive,” there is part of this forgiveness that involves the restraining of wrongdoing and true repentance on the part of the person who has done wrong.  And, the good news is that the forgiving and reconciling work of Jesus is not finished.  God’s new way to live is something that we might not see or experience this side of heaven, but there is promise and hope that God will, in the end, make all things right.  

Justice will be done and relationships will be made right in the kingdom, even if it is hard for us to see right now.  For God, the door is always open.  And, for us. . . well, in that spirit, may our minds and hearts always be open to the life and example and teachings of Jesus – even the difficult teachings that we can understand and embody only with God’s help.  

In this time when relationships between friends, and neighbors, and even siblings in Christ can be strained and tested and sometimes broken by all that is going on in the world, my prayer is that this place may be an example of right relationships, of speaking the truth, of accountability and repentance, of listening with grace, and, ultimately, a place of healing.  

May God make it so.  May God make us so.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.  Amen.   

------ 

[1] Warren Carter, Matthew and the Margins: A Sociopolitical and Religious Reading (Maryknoll: Orbis Books, 2000) 367.

[2] M.J.

[3] Shirley Erena Murray, 1998. Glory to God: The Presbyterian Hymnal (Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press, 2013) No. 769, v. 4.

[4] Sarah Moon, Patheos, June 9, 2013.  https://www.patheos.com/blogs/sarahoverthemoon/2013/06/when-my-abuser-is-welcome-at-the-table-i-am-not/.

[5] Warren Carter, 369.

[6] Paraphrased, JHS.

[7] Presbyterian Church (USA), The Book of Order: The Constitution of the Presbyterian Church (USA) Part II (Louisville: Presbyterian Publishing, 2023) D-1.031.  

[chirpsythismorning]

It would appear I am indeed one of the very few optimistic (delusional?) Bylers left.

Not saying that if you feel hopeless and need to move on, that you can't. A lot of you have been through this before with other shows. Again and again. You’re tired and fed-up and you have every right to be.

Technically, Season 5 won't be out for another 2+ years anyways, which means the best thing for everyone regardless is to get whatever we need off our chests now and then to just go on a hiatus for the foreseeable future. 

When it comes to how I feel about Vol. 2, there were definitely at least a few good moments. If this season has anything going for it, it’s the emotional value. This is without a doubt the most I’ve cried ever while watching the show. One scene in particular that had me on the floor was the scene with Will and El reuniting and hugging. And of course the scene with Will and Mike in the van (DAMN YOU NOAH SCHNAPP FOR MAKING ME SOB SO HARD ALL DAY THAT I GOT A MIGRAINE!)

But yes, I am a Byler. So you could say I was a bit disappointed in that department.

And yet still, I think my take on the later part of season 4 is much different from the majority.

Because personally, I don’t think that what played out in Vol. 2 means that Byler is dead. If anything, I believe it to be more endgame than I did before (well, at least in comparison to pre-s4. There’s no denying pre-Vol. 2 confidence levels remain unmatched. Truly the best era for the Byler fandom to date).

I think my main issue is, like so many of us on here, I thought it was guaranteed we would get to see Mike become aware of Will’s feelings. 

Alas, we did not.

And to be totally clear, without this revelation, Byler can’t go anywhere. 

Neither forwards, nor technically backwards.

This means the baiting game is not over. Which as bad as it sounds, is why I’m still so optimistic…

Now, if they had made Will’s feelings obvious to Mike, or even the fact that Will is gay as being obvious to Mike, but STILL had Mike behave the way he did in Vol. 2, now THAT would have sucked. It would have been canon rejection on Mike’s end.

But we didn’t even get rejection from Mike. 

Instead, we got Will coming off as a hardcore M*leven shipper in Mike's eyes, all while the audience was getting the exact opposite interpretation of this situation; that Will is helplessly in love with Mike. 

Will is able to voice the extent of his love, albeit through advice to Mike about his own situation with El, in a way that no one else on the show has been able to. Most of the other characters need a bunch of bystanders to make them realize their feelings and push them in that direction. But Will, he doesn’t need someone holding his hand along the way, telling him what the right thing to do or say is. His love isn’t something he needs to really think about in order to understand it. It just is.

(Which is SO fucking ironic when you think about how Mike always needs help with figuring out his feelings for El and even sounds like he’s reading off a script when he’s trying to explain himself to her. Whereas with Will, s2 monologue teas, it’s the most natural thing Mike’s ever done. Unscripted, straight from the heart… And both Vol. 1-2 continued to drive home this concept, so maybe jot that down..)

It’s just that, unfortunately, in Will’s eyes, Mike will never return this love, which means his only option is to let Mike go. If supporting Mike and El’s relationship means putting himself dead last in every respect, so that his best friend and his sister can be happy, Will is going to do just that. 

But as far as Mike knows, Will holds no romantic feelings for him. I mean after all, Will is guiding Mike literally every step of the way to confessing his love to El, and that doesn't sound like the behavior of someone who’s in love with you, now does it? 

So why would Mike, throw everything on the line, including the survival of their family and friends in Hawkins by not simply just telling his gf he loves her? All while El is right there loving him and needing his love to fight (presumably), with Will beside him literally rooting for him to do just that? This is very obviously the only option in Mike’s eyes.

Which is ironic, because in a way, I think that Mike has truly never seen him and Will as an option, just like Will, but for an entirely different reason. 

Mike views his feelings for Will as childish, something he will grow out of, or at least should have by now.

“We’re not kids anymore. What did you think, really? That we were never going to get girlfriends? That we were just going to sit in my basement and play games for the rest of our lives?”

If Mike can’t love El, then how can he possibly love any women? She’s special. She’s a superhero. He HAS to love her, right? It’s the best option he could ever possibly have. Well, at least considering…

But what happens when suddenly, he comes to the realization that him and Will ARE an option? And that the only thing ever stopping them was himself and his inability to just be honest with everyone and himself?

I think the truth is, there’s a reason that they’re holding off on this revelation for Mike. 

It will be a catalyst. It will change everything.

Now, how exactly do you think Mike is going to react to this? The fact that Will was in love with him this whole time and he had no idea?

Honestly, I think he’s going to react horribly, but not for the reason everyone assumes.

Because I would argue that, if Mike was going to react badly with disgust or even just let Will down nicely to confirm it’s indeed unrequited, then the Duffer’s would have just given this revelation up by now. But they haven’t.

Once Mike finds out that Will is (probably always will be) in love with him, and that instead of telling him, Will used his love to help Mike get closer to El, even when Mike himself was having doubts over and over? That Will went as far as to lie about the painting he worked so hard on for Mike in order to rekindle their dying friendship, to instead insinuate it was commission from El, to give Mike that final push he needed to even have the courage to tell El he loved her? That all the moments like this that they shared as of late, was really just Will talking about himself? That the only reason he was able to tell El he loved her in the first place, was because he was so moved by Will’s love for him??

This is going to break Mike.

And let’s be real here, two episodes would not have done this revelation justice. 

So now, just knowing the direction they went for Vol. 2, as well as coming to terms with it, I have reached the conclusion that, despite how bleak things seem now, ‘maybe all of this is happening for a reason’ (s2 Mike Wheeler, we miss u).

Which brings me to the other most important piece of the puzzle, which is that, arguably, El needs to be the one who ends things once and for all.

The general audience has been given the impression El is head over heels in love with Mike, and so of course they were rooting for Mike to get on with it and just tell her he loved her. 

But that’s the interesting part. He finally did tell her, but her reaction in the aftermath was not something a lot of fans expected. 

It seems that she’s distancing herself from Mike, a fact that Will acknowledges to Mike later at Hopper’s cabin, with Mike genuinely confused because he thought he did the one thing he had to do. 

He told her he loved her. Which makes everything alright now, right?

But maybe it doesn’t.

Maybe the reminder we got, of that speech from Max to El, about how she didn’t need Mike or Hopper or ANY man to know her worth, was foreshadowing for what honestly needs to happen in order for El to really process and realize her own true feelings about Mike.

Because, although I do believe El genuinely thought she loved Mike, is it possible that Mike was not only having doubts about saying it because of the reasons he argued, or even because of some repressed feelings for Will, but also because El hadn’t given him what he needed to truly believe she loved him.

Mike, like a lot of people, doesn’t need to hear “I love you” to believe that someone loves him.

“I didn’t say it.”

“You didn’t have to.”

He wants something more meaningful, or more specifically, something along the lines of the speech Will gave to him in the van.

Will’s confession disguised as El’s, was what Mike needed to finally say I love you to El... 

Something I think we also got caught up in, is this idea that the Duffer’s were just going to drop M*leven and throw in Byler, with everything else going on, while they still have a whole ass season to promote for another 3+ years, and to their mostly 80’s loving homophobic audience. If Byler is going to happen, it’s going to be the definition of slow-burn and endgame. That’s literally the only way. 

This puzzle is complex, which sucks if you want all the answers now, because we’re just not going to get them. If they give up all their moves, then what is the point of telling the story at all? 

Other pieces of the puzzle include things that arguably still need to happen before Byler can, even regardless of the constraints they have as show-runners who run the biggest show on Netflix’s dying platform. 

Things like Will and El’s love for each other as brother and sister. Considering all the fans that said Will hates El because he didn’t stand up to her bullies or that he’s a home-wrecker who just wants to get with her boyfriend, is why I do think they needed to debunk these insinuations within the narrative. And boy oh boy did they deliver on that front. Will is the most selfless son of a bitch on the planet, who loves his best friend and his sister so much. They made that very clear. And you can see that despite a few homophobes here and there, the general audience's reaction to Will in Vol 2 is sympathy and to Mike it's confusion and betrayal...

Hmm, making El realize she doesn't even love Mike, after making Will's unrequited feelings for Mike more clear, after making Mike behave like an IDIOT this entire time juggling these two relationships, only for him to become aware of whats going on, and to clearly be in love with Will?

Sounds like a good way to set up Byler to an audience that might not have humored it before...

And like I said, with how important I do think it was for this to happen in order for them to go the Byler route, is why I don’t necessarily see this approach as a bad thing. We even got the Will and El hug in 4x08, which maybe it’s just because Noah and Millie are so close, but I would easily rank that on my top most well-earned moments in the whole show.

We NEEDED that. Especially in terms of what is likely to come in season 5 with Byler endgame...

Also, yes the Will angst sucked and it's just trauma porn at this point. I’m not going to deny that fully. I agree with pretty much all of the criticism in regards to how they chose to do certain things when they didn't necessarily have to, but I also simultaneously am able to understand that it again, maybe this is all happening for a reason. If they are indeed going to have Will play a big role in the final season, than them forgetting his birthday, Mike being oblivious and all this other shit he's been through combined, sets up a really arc for him next season, not even necessarily a villain one, but all of this pain has the potential to lead to a happy ending. And I'm being full serious.

Like we have Finn Wolfhard saying the ending of Stranger Things will be like the ending of Schitt’s Creek??? That it will end at it's highest point. The last episode of Schitt’s Creek is literally a happily ever after gay wedding, there's no other way to interpret that…

We also know that a lot of ideas for the last seasons were planned from the beginning, with David Harbour saying that he knew the ending way back in s2 and that it's beautiful and has been the intended plan all along. That there's easter eggs that will have us going 'WOW this is what we've been watching the whole time'? That it's wonderful?

If you’re the level of Byler truther that believes they were somewhat planned all along from the beginning, then you would also know that if they plan a happy ending for Mike and Will, then they would have no problem killing us this painfully in the beginning of the end, because they know we’ll be the ones cheering on by the actual end, and it'll be the homophobes who are pissed and stuck with this result forever as endgame. 

I’m just saying, don’t be surprised when s5 gets closer and we actually see them promoting Byler… like a lot. And we actually start getting in canon hints at scenes with El herself even trying to get them together.

Groveling Mike Wheeler era?

Will finding a potential new love interest and Mike pining/jealous?

Come ONNN! You guys are way more delusional than you’re giving yourselves credit for and I urge you to join me!!!

[racingliners]

Like what I did last year, I'll be updating this reblog as we get each car launch (though as I'm typing this in January it'll be a good few weeks before we get the remaining 2024 cars). First up:

McLaren

What I would have written for my livery prediction is that given how popular their stealth livery was last year, I wasn't going to be surprised if their 2024 livery was very similar to that.

And lo and behold, so it is!

While I still take issue with the weight saving exposed carbon trend, the stealth livery and the 2024 McLaren livery are at least more thought out in where the exposed carbon is so it isn't the first thing you notice (unlike their 2023 livery which really bugged me).

I also absolutely love that the driver numbers are in silver chrome (done intentionally as a nod to the famous Vodafone chrome livery of the mid 00s and early 2010s), it's just a really nice touch that stands out against the orange and black really well.

I do miss the sky blue accents though :( I don't think it would have been remis to have thin lines where the orange and black parts meet, especially since they're still present on the 2024 McLaren teamwear.

7.5/10

Haas

Oh look, it's (almost) the same livery. Consider me blessed with Apollo's dodgeball to the face of prophecy.

Honestly though, I preferred last year's car. I liked the glossy white being the predominant colour whereas the all exposed carbon is quite plain. Don't get me wrong I do still enjoy the colour scheme, it just... idk looks very corporate. I also wish there was a tad more red to make it look a bit brighter.

6/10

Williams

So this is definitely an evolution of the 22 and 23 livery, however I do miss the geometric pattern since it was something that made the Williams cars stand out compared to the rest of the gird. That being said I love the choice of combining the heritage navy blue and the brighter more cobalt blue, showcasing Williams' past and future in F1. And while this picture doesn't show it there's also a nod to the first Frank Williams racing logo on the back of the engine cover which is a very beautiful touch.

7.5/10 (I miss the arrowheads on the wheel caps 😔)

Sauber

Honestly? I really don't mind it that much. I really like the neon green, the grid desperately needs some drastic injection of colour with the ongoing exposed carbon trend and I especially love that it's a glossy neon green. (But just picture this with a glossy black paint, it would look sooooo good!)

Though I do wonder how they got this livery so right, and their overalls so wrong (if I rated overalls as well they would not be favoured well)

a very solid 6.5/10

Alpine

...

idk if I'm just extra crabby because I've caught another cold but WHAT HAVE THEY DONE???????

Mes amis, this is not a livery this is stickers on exposed carbon. And what bothers me even more if that the gradient tile concept would look STUNNING if it was all over the car (like their team wear for 2023 for example).

And don't get me started on the whole pink camo teases they put out on their social media only for the pink "livery" (which we will be seeing at 8 races this year) also has just as much exposed carbon on it.

3/10 and that honestly feels generous.

Racing Bulls (I flat out refuse to call them VCARB)

Okay I will let them have their silly name since they actually painted the car, and I have once again been gifted Apollo's prophetic powers because hello Toro Rosso drinks can livery 2.0

While this is not as good as the original I do absolutely adore the return to the all over metallic blue with silver and red accents. It just works. Though the massive white stripe containing the Hugo Boss logo on the front is quite jarring. I don't understand why it would have just been in red (by contrast the one on the engine cover is fine since it's smaller).

But honestly? I do like it. 7/10

Aston Martin

Alas there is more carbon fibre on the car than last year BUT thankfully it's not immediately obvious and the car continues to be my most beloved glossy semi-metallic green 💚

If it ain't broke, don't fix it. 9/10

Ferrari

Alas I am still awaiting the return of the burgundy Ferrari but ciao bella 😍

I love that they've kept the Ferrari logo on the rear wing, and I also like the red wheel caps and I think the white and yellow stripes are both gorgeous and what I'm assuming is an ode to Ferrari's Le Mans winning hypercar from last year. I will say that the shade of red does not look good in the rendering lighting, having seen pictures from the shakedown at Fiorano it looks much better in daylight.

My only gripe is that it's matte, and the yellow outline on the driver numbers, keeping them just white would have been absolutely fine.

8/10

Mercedes

I have never been happier for my prediction to be wrong, my jaw genuinely dropped upon opening instagram and seeing the W15 this morning.

I LOVE the return to a half-silver-half-black livery, especially with the thicker Petronas teal stripes and silver stars on the engine cover. It is just absolutely stunning.

No notes. 10/10.

Red Bull

And we end livery watch on a very meh note. I still hate the matte navy, it's too dark and there's even less neon red than last year. I'm especially disappointed that the newer style Red Bull logo is on the cars, with the fact that the older logo with the white outline is on most of the RBR associated drivers helmets this year made me hope they were going back to it. Alas, it's just the same livery we've had since 2016.

2/10

Livery Watch 2024

Well I am typing this out way earlier than I expected (thanks McLaren), but I legit had so much fun rating and yelling about all the different team liveries last year that I'm going to do it again this year.

This was going to be my wishlist/prediction post for each team but lo and behold McLaren revealed their 2024 livery today, so I'll be talking about the remaining 9 teams instead, and I'll go a little bit more in-depth in the reblog below about McLaren's 2024 livery.

Red Bull: As much as I desperately yearn for a return to the glossy dark metallic blue livery of the early-mid 2010s, I am 90% sure we're going to see the same livery on their car they've used since 2016, but with the usual annual sponsor logo adjustments

Mercedes: Given how positively their return to an all black livery was perceived, I think we'll see the same thing on the car this year with very subtle silver and Petronas teal accents. (However a piece of my heart would certainly be very happy with chrome silver as an alternative!)

Ferrari: Also asking Ferrari to ditch the matte paint but I know it won't happen. I honestly loved last year's livery, especially with the text logo on the rear wing, but if they go for a more burgundy leaning red like their 1000th race livery then I will have never said anything bad about Ferrari ever actually.

Aston Martin: Zero notes. Though if I see any exposed carbon I will be suing Lawrence Stroll for emotional damages.

Alpine: I am actually a blue and pink livery apologist (the all over pink is still extremely beloved though!!) so hopefully we'll have more of the same this year.

Williams: I've really loved the geometric blue tile livery they're ran for the past couple of years, my only tweak would be to use slightly lighter shades of blue since overall last year's grid did look quite dark last year with all the exposed carbon. I'm also echoing what I said last year in that a total switch up to the white to blue ombre livery the team ran during their RoKit sponsorship years would be really nice to see.

Sauber: No I'm not calling them Stake F1 Team Sauber, I have better things to do with my time. It's just Sauber. Anyway, I'm expecting the livery to be quite a drastic change as part of the rebrand from Alfa Romeo to Stake, and if we're taking hints from their big social media overhaul I think there's going to be a lot of black and neon green (I do think that they're going to be treading a fine line between looking really nice or the W15 ordered off Wish)

Alpha Tauri/Racing Bulls: I honestly loved the navy and white Alpha Tauri liveries, imho they were really stylish and made them look like less of a Red Bull junior team. I don't really know what their rebrand is going to look like, so in the mean time I am going to yearn for a return to the iconic Toro Rosso drinks can livery from 2017 and 2018.

Haas: Unless Moneygram join the exodus of departures from Haas, I think we're going to see some kind of black and white livery with red accents. Personally I'd like there to be more red and a glossy black (matte pain continues to be my behated) but like with Red Bull if it ends up being a nearly identical livery to last year then I won't be surprised.