#I feel like I’ve been getting sick a lot more lately. planning to barge into a walk-in tomorrow and say ‘hey what the fuck is going on’

[peaches2217]

Y’ever have really strong feelings about something and wanna write it all out but nothing’s coming to you? Just strong but unspecific emotions?

Mareach… good fluffies… happy feelings… wanna write… but write WHAT???

[plume-pigmented-pili]

Hey hey! here’s a little something I wrote for Eli a few months ago. They convinced me i should post it, so here i am lol

———

Tw: Descriptions of a Cold, sickness (non graphic), feelings unwanted, coughing, headaches, misunderstandings, hurt/comfort. Let me know if I need to add more!

Words: 5.2k

Pairing: Prinxiety (Written as Romantic but could be read as platonic i guess)

“Virgil is miserable. Its the middle of the night, and Virgil is stuck in bed, unable to sleep, with a horrible cold. The actual cold isn’t why he’s miserable, though.

Is it selfish to want to be cared for?”

—

Through Sickness and Health

Virgil could hear the clock on the opposite wall ticking just a tad too fast, and didn’t need to even look over at it to know it was way too late to be awake. Sure, he didn’t have the best sleep schedule, but at least he was usually enjoying himself when he stayed up, and it was rarely this late. It wasn’t even his fault this time.

But here Virgil was, laying in bed curled under all the blankets he owned, wishing he was dead. On paper, that sounds a lot worse than it really was, but who could blame him? The sweet release of death sounded like heaven compared to suffering here any longer. His throat was sandpaper dry, nose clogged with snot, and what felt like a small bomb went off in his skull with every movement.

That, though, wasn’t the main reason he was suffering.

He’d been sick before, he knew it would be over soon, but no physical pain could compare to the hurt he felt, knowing that the others knew of his illness, and didn’t give a single damn.

There was no way they didn’t know what was happening - even if he’d tried to hide it, which he hadn’t, it’s not like acting was ever his specialty - but not a single one of them had batted an eye since he came down with this stress induced cold.

Well, that wasn’t completely true. Patton had asked if he was feeling alright on day two, when Virgil had shuffled downstairs around three in the afternoon to grab a snack, hoodie flipped up as he dug around, his hands clearly shaky from fever yet he’d been too tired to try and hide it. He’d told Patton, in the least shaky voice he could muster, that he just wasn’t feeling very well.

In hindsight, it had probably been incredibly selfish of him to expect Patton to come to his aid and comfort him, maybe offer to tuck him in on the couch and make him something healthy to eat. He’d seen Patton do just that plus more when Logan or Roman were feeling under the weather after all. But despite knowing it was selfish, he couldn’t help the disappointment and sinking feeling he’d felt when Patton had simply responded with a gentle, almost pitying, “I’m sorry kiddo, thank you for telling me.” before walking away rather hurriedly, leaving it there.

The conversation rolled around in his head, as it had been for the past 5 days. Nobody had come to check on him, not even the resident fatherly side to see if he was feeling any better. He’d been downstairs one other time since that little exchange with Patton, but when he’d walked in on Roman and Logan talking casually in the living room, they’d both given him short, obviously forced smiles, and sunk out. That’d been on day three, and Virgil hadn’t gone back down there since. He wasn’t that hungry anyway.

Maybe they didn’t want to get sick? Or maybe they thought he was gross, and didn’t want to be near him. Did they think he would be rude to them?

All this thinking was making Virgil’s head hurt more. And it really didn’t matter the reason. They didn’t care, they clearly wanted to avoid him.

It hurt, worse than his actual sickness, having to stay away from everyone for days on end. It reminded him of the old days before he was accepted, when he wasn’t welcome anywhere else but the confinement of his room. He missed Patton’s warm greeting each time he walked into a room, or the rants Logan would get lost in that were strangely so calming. Most notably, though, he missed Roman.

He missed their stupid banter that always left him feeling more confident, and the never ending singing that Virgil pretended not to adore. Hell, he missed just talking to the creative side. He’d give anything just to have a conversation with him, just to lift his spirits a little. He longed for one of the warm, solid hugs that only Roman could give.

He would probably even give up his Disney posters, his entire MCR song library, or get banned from every Hot Topic in the country, just to be held and cuddled right at this moment. To be held in warm, secure arms, wrapped in the scent of cinnamon and roses, and drift to sleep knowing he wouldn’t be alone in the morning.

That last one had about a zero percent chance of happening, even if he wasn’t sick and contagious, but Virgil’s sleep deprived, fever ridden brain had decided to be sentimental, and Virgil couldn’t even stop it. At least he wasn’t gone enough to consider asking for any of that comfort he craved. it’d be easier for everyone to just wait in his room until he was better. Then maybe things would be normal again.

And that was his plan, until someone knocked on his door.

The anxious side’s gaze shot over to the clock, grimacing when the quick movement made his eyeballs throb. Who the Hell was knocking on his door at nearly 3:45 in the morning?

“Who-“ Virgil cringed at how his gravely voice broke, cleared his throat, then tried again. “Who is it?”

“I knew you were awake!” Romans voice, surprisingly enough, came from the other side of the door. He was clearly trying to stay quiet, but for some reason, he sounded really… relieved, and chipper. A second later, the Prince added a bit more bashfully, “Uh, unless i just woke you up by knocking, and if that’s the case I sincerely apologize, I didn’t mea-“

“No, I w’s already awake…” Virgil interrupted with a slight slur, groggy brain trying to keep up with what was happening. Being the embodiment of Anxiety, though, meant he didn’t get to stop being anxious just because he was sick. Why was he here? Was he angry? Virgil couldn’t recall doing anything that could offend anyone since he’d been self-quarantined, but then again, he couldn’t really remember his last name at the moment either. He mumbled to himself as he untangled his legs from the covers, cursing the universe under his breath because his head felt two times it’s normal size. Then he took a deep breath and sat up. He didn’t want to make Roman uncomfortable or grossed out seeing him all sick in bed, cause holy shit would that be embarrassing. He still didn’t look great, but it was a small step. “Come in Pr’ncey.”

The door swung open, revealing a timid, bed headed Roman, who seemed to relax a little when noticing Virgil sitting up in bed. “Hey there.. sorry to barge in, I hope i’m not bothering you.” he said, voice still lowered and really quite gentle as he shut the door behind him.

Virgil went to shake his head, but stopped himself before he could cause himself fucking brain damage and just shrugged instead. “ y’re not both’ring me. ‘sup?” yikes, all this sitting up and trying to look presentable business was making him realize how exhausted he was. His eyelids felt heavy already.

Roman took a few steps forward, keeping his eyes steadily on Virgil like he was waiting for him to keel over and die, or cough on him. It seemed pretty damn dramatic, even for Roman. “I… just wanted to check on you. I’ve uh, been a little worried about you, and i couldn’t sleep.” The Prince said, hesitant as he lowered himself on the foot of the bed.

Virgil blinked a few times, curling his legs up so his knees were to his chest to make sure Roman wouldn’t touch his feet under the 5 layers of blankets he had over him. Or maybe it was the sudden, treacherous hope that was rising in him, a hope he was trying to stifle. Roman was… worried about him? Roman of all sides? I mean, he wasn’t surprised that he cared, he and Roman were friends now after all. Virgil was just surprised he cared about this. He thought they were all in agreement to avoid him or something.

Virgil was about to open his mouth and say… something - he didn’t really know what he was going to say. It felt like his train of thought was chugging along through molasses - but he was interrupted before he could get any words out.

“Dude… no offense, but you look like actual death. And why in the name of Hades are you buried under so many blankets?” The Prince asked with what sounded like genuine confusion, at least for the second part.

Virgil huffed and pulled the blankets tighter around him, the movement causing him to shiver. He couldn’t decide what to focus on; The cold air on his back, the rising sensation of relief knowing Roman cared, or how weird that question had been. Quite honestly, Virgil wasn’t offended because he knew he looked like shit. he was just a little confused. He thought Roman would have known he’d look like shit. “What do you mean why do I have so many blankets. I literally feel like ’m freezing to death. ’s part of the package, shouldn’t you know this?” He practically deadpanned, not even for the snarkiness like usual. His speech was just dull.

But that only left Roman looking more confused, and probably a good deal more concerned if his expression was anything to go by. “I-... I didn’t know that, no.. I’m sorry. Do you want another blanket or something…?” he asked carefully, still awfully and almost painfully cautious.

And Virgil… was at a loss for how this could possibly be new information to Roman. it was pretty common knowledge even if you’ve never had a fever before. But instead of dwelling, Virgil once again stopped himself from shaking his head, sighing instead. “No, it won’ help.” he said shortly. The effort would be futile, but it was endearing that Roman at least asked. “Thanks though. That’s.. really nice of you t’ offer.” The anxious side offered a bit more quietly.

There was an awkward silence that followed, Roman shuffling his feet against the carpet slightly as he looked around the room. Virgil saw the other’s eyes catch on the pile of used tissues in the floor, another bout of confusion flashing in his bright green eyes, but he didn’t mention it this time. Maybe it was a lack of sleep making the Prince act so clueless at the moment. “I… I guess i’ve just.. i don’t know, everything is more boring without you around. Nobody to insult without actually offending them.” Roman spoke again after a moment, sending a half smile in Virgil’s direction.

A little smirk matched with a snort is what the Prince was rewarded with, Virgil's spirits lifted regardless of his misery. It felt nice knowing he was missed, and it made his chest warm knowing it was coming from Roman. For some reason, knowing he could make things more bearable for his counterpart was.. rewarding, in a way. And Roman looked proud of himself, before he continued a bit more solemnly. “You’ve been cooped up in here for so long, like what, 5 says now?”

That got Virgil to sigh, and maybe there was some defensiveness laying beneath the surface, made worse thanks to being miserable, but all he managed was a mildly annoyed side eye to Roman as he responded in a mumble, still doing his best not to run Roman off. “‘t’s not my fault.”

Roman was quick to shake his head, slight guilt in his expression. “I know! I-I’m not trying to make you feel bad, i guess i just- i don’t know, i’m just talking out loud… sorry.” Roman’s voice had quieted, eyes trained on the floor somewhat shamefully as he seemed to search for his words. “I just.. I just wish…” but once again, he trailed off, shaking his head and seeming to give up. “I’m sorry.”

“‘s fine, Princey.” Virgil mumbled back, eyes dropping to his lap where he picked at a loose string on his bedspread. Another silence followed, Virgil trying to sniffle as silently as he could. Despite how weird this interaction had been so far, and how slightly awkward it’s gotten, Virgil was honestly just trying to soak in the mere presence of another side while it lasted. He’d never liked being alone for so long. His stomach was starting to hurt for a reason aside from sickness. This sure was a good way to get Roman to leave early, the others were probably right for leaving him alone so far.

Suddenly, Virgil squeezed the blankets in his fist to try and stop a sudden tickle in his throat, the sensation coming out of nowhere. Unfortunately though, his instincts won out just seconds later as he was forced to cough, the sound gargled and gross even when he covered the whole bottom half of his face with his covers. Dammit, dammit, stupid fucking cough. And Roman just got there too. He wasn’t ready for the creative side to leave again yet.

“S- Sorry, sorry ‘bout that. Shit.” He mumbled rather quickly, hoping to by just a few minutes longer of the creative side’s company before it was taken away again for who knows how long. His head felt like it was being split open, no thanks to the effort it took to cough. Who the Hell’s idea was sickness? They should be fired.

Much to his surprise though, when Virgil hesitantly looked up to gauge how put off Roman was by his display, he only saw an overwhelming about of worry, but even more importantly, alarm.

“Apologies, but is this like- normal??” Roman asked with eyes noticeably wider, studying Virgil's pained expression, hunched over posture, the mess of dirty tissues around, and the way the bright numbers of his digital clock on his nightstand was covered carefully, with a washcloth no doubt.

Virgil drew in a deep, slow breath through his nose as he rubbed on his temples to try and alleviate some pain, eyes closed and head tilted down. Roman’s ridiculous questions were just making his headache worse, and honestly he didn’t even understand how the Hell he was so confused. Was this his plan? To come in here and confuse Virgil and his already incapacitated brain? ‘Cause if so, he was doing a brilliant job. “Roman, what the hell are you talking about.”

It came out less like a question, more like a very tired statement, but he was answered with confused stammering, Roman gesturing almost desperately to Virgil and his state. “What do you mean what am I talking about?? Dude, you’re clearly not doing well. I mean, I wasn’t gonna bring it up, but you’re sweating like a sinner in church, you’re covered in a thousand blankets, you were just hacking up a lung and you’re barely able to speak right from, what i’m assuming, is a nose full of mucus!”

“Yeah, okay, I get it. I look like shit, Pr’ncey, enough said.” Virgil snapped, glaring up at Roman and accidentally moving his head up to look at him too fast, sending a flare of agony through his skull. He cursed under his breath and winced, but powered through it even as Roman lifted a hand to- to what, help? It didn’t matter, Virgil moved away from the effort. “No, don’t touch me, alright? I don’t wan’ your pity.”

Virgil knew all of this was coming out more aggressive than he ever would allow if he was feeling himself. Hell, even now he was begging himself to just shut up and stay calm. But after almost 2 full days with no sleep, and 5 days of nonstop pain, coughing, being unable to breath properly, the feeling of fire in his throat every time he tried to eat, and then on top of that, being shunned by the 3 people he wanted- needed, more than anything. Well, he really couldn’t stop his composure from cracking and shattering.

Roman looked ready to respond, seemingly struck with more pity than before, but Virgil’s hand shot up to stop him. “I don’t want to hear it, Princey. Why the Hell are you even here anyway? If you’ve missed me so much, why did you wait 5 f’cking days to come see me? T’ come ‘check on me’? And, by th’ way, so far you’ve really only been fucking with me and making me feel worse, so in reality it probably would ‘ve been better had you just kept up your streak of avoiding me like ev’ryone else!”

Virgil was breathing heavily, head pounding and lungs burning after raising his voice just a bit too much at the end of his rant. He replayed the words back in his mind, heart sinking when he realized how aggressive he’d gotten. He couldn’t slow down his breathing, why couldn’t he slow his breathing?? Jesus christ, he wasn’t about to break down on top of all that other shit he just unleashed. Perfect, he was just proving the other side’s point for them.

With his body now starting to shake, jaw clenched to hold back tears because this week has been bullshit, and he felt like curling up and disappearing, if not to escape his aching body then to at least escape the anger he knew would result from that whole verbal meltdown he just had. Obviously Roman would be leaving, but would he yell first? Tell him how annoying and selfish he was, and how he didn’t get to be a huge asshole just because he was feeling a little under the weather? Or would he leave in silence, just exit the room with that silent, cold anger that Roman only showed when he was really upset.

Maybe he’d tell everyone else what happened, how he’d tried to extend an olive branch, test it out just to see if maybe his illness hadn’t made him into a pathetic prick, but Virgil lashed out as expected and ran him off. Would Logan and Patton get mad at him too? Come in and tell him off for being so horrible to his own family, that he couldn’t even be a decent person for 5 minutes.

Maybe things wouldn’t go back to normal even after he’s recovered, all because he couldn’t just control himself.

“Virgil, what are you talking about?” Roman asked exasperated, and Virgil dragged his hands down his face. He meant to make more of a growl in frustration, but it came out closer to a pained whine. His eyes stung for a new reason now. He just wanted this to stop. Why wouldn’t Roman just stop?

“What. What am I talking about what. I can’t do this- this whole vague shit righ’now, jus’ spit it out.” He hated how short tempered he was sounding, but Roman didn’t seem to be fazed. Virgil could see the Prince waving his hands around in his peripheral, looking tongue tied.

“The- The part where you think i’m fucking with you?? Why you think we’re avoiding you?? Why you’re so-... so….” Roman trailed off, a look of realization crossing his face, which quickly turned to horror and guilt. “Wait a… w-wait a second, Virgil, are you- are you sick??”

To say Roman sounded appalled would be an understatement, his eyes wide in shock, brows drawn, mouth slightly agape. Virgil’s head spun, suddenly dizzy as his brain tried to figure out why Roman sounded so horrified- why he sounded so surprised. He couldn’t stand it, he couldn’t understand what was going on. He felt nauseous and he just wanted to sleep. Before he knew it, tears were trekking down his face, thick tears springing from his eyes making the pressure behind them even more unbearable. A sob tore painfully from his throat, instantly catching the Prince’s full attention.

“Oh my… Virgil-“

Virgil shrunk away from the Prince’s voice, curling up once more into a ball, trying to hide from everything. His lip wobbled, he could feel it, but he was too tired to be embarrassed or feel pathetic. He pulled the covers closer around him. “R-Roman, please jus’-“ He hiccuped on a sob, hissed through his teeth as the action sent a sharp pain through his lungs. “I don’ know i-if you’re tryin’ to joke ‘r somethin’, but— but ’s n- not funny, o-okay?”

Instead of speaking clearly at a normal volume, Virgil was nearly mumbling the entire time he was speaking, slurring through words even worse than when the conversation started. Was it just him, or was the room spinning? “Please, i… i need you t’...” Virgil huffed for breath, exhaustion wearing on him like a switch was just suddenly flipped. It nearly took all his energy to try and get a deep breath.

“Ro…”

Virgil was met with a warm, broad chest, and strong arms wrapping around him before he even knew he was slumping forward. His ears were ringing, drowning out what sounded like a familiar voice speaking to him. They sounded distressed, he hoped they were okay. What was combing through his hair? He couldn’t quite remember what was going on before then, but all he knew was, he was safe now.

Then, the world went dark.

———

Virgil came into consciousness a little while later, his brain the kind of blissfully empty that only comes after passing out, apparently. He couldn’t grasp where he was before, existing in a reality where there is no past for a few moments. His head was vaguely aching, like a dull throb faded into the background, and his lungs stung only a little when he breathed in deeply. In his sleepy state though, Virgil didn’t concern himself with those feelings.

Virgil couldn’t see anything, he noticed not long after, but he could hear murmuring and the distant sound of water running.

Next, he realized he knew he wasn’t in his own room anymore, both because this wasn’t his mattress, and the room didn’t smell like his own.

He could smell.. cinnamon… and peaches… and ink. Somewhere in his groggy brain, Virgil recognized the smell, but at the moment it was just out of his reach. It didn’t bother him, though, not when he was so relaxed and calm. He felt like he was one with the bed, and the soft, fluffy sheets encasing him.

A few more seconds of coming to, and Virgil realized his eyes were covered with something damp, and cool… soft too. It felt amazing against his warm skin. oh right, i’m sick, a thought entered his mind gently.

Then, a lot less gently, the events from before he passed out rushed to the forefront of his mind, practically smacking him in the face. Because yes, he’d passed out, right in front of Roman like an idiot, oh shit, why isn’t he in his room, where is he-

“Virgil? Hey woah, calm down buddy- here,” Virgil heard someone quickly cross the room, and tended his body for all of two seconds before the washcloth over his eyes was being lifted.

Virgil blinked blearily, squinting his eyes even though the room was almost completely shrouded in darkness, save for a thin line of light coming from the cracked bathroom door. Someone was sat beside him on the side of the bed, but he was too blurry for Virgil to make out details.

“There you are. Hey Hot Topic, how are you feeling?” the person asked, speaking more gently than anyone had spoken to Virgil in a long time. Strangely though, Virgil wasn’t upset by it. It was.. nice…

Wait a minute, he knew that voice.

“R- Roman..? I.. Where…?” Distantly, Virgil knew he sounded like shit, which meant he probably looked like shit, and directly after asking that half assed question, he realized he had to be in the Princes room. “Oh.. fuckin’- I passed out on you..” he groaned, moving his hands up to scrub the blurriness from his eyes.

It worked, surprisingly, and now that Virgil could see, he realized that yes, Roman was the one sitting next to him, and yes he was in Roman’s room, in Roman’s bed. He also noticed how tossed Roman’s hair was, and the bright red with little snowmen pajamas the Prince wore. They were really adorable.

“Yes, I’m afraid you did.. and I’m also afraid that I am partly to blame for it.” Roman sighed, casting his eyes down as he pressed his lips in a line.

Virgil’s brows drew together, and, because he was so delirious, he reached out to grab gently at Romans sleeve. “How is it your fault that I passed out?” he asked incredulously. At least he could speak properly now. Now? Now since when? Oh geez, “Wait how long have I been out? A few hours? Days? Years?! Did I fall into a coma?!”

The corner of Roman’s lip lifted in amusement, and he gently lay a hand over Virgil’s, on his sleeve. “No, no nothing like that, Dark Knight. It’s only been an hour or so. I.. hope you don’t mind, but I had to bring you in here. Your fever was… really high.” The Prince of Creativity said, solemn by the end.

“I think i’ve managed to get it down, so it’s not so dangerous anymore, but Logan will definitely have to keep an eye on it today.”

That got Virgil's attention. “Wait- Logan? Uh.. yeah, not to burst your bubble Princey, but I doubt that’ll be happening.” There was a slight bitterness to his tone as he wrapped his free arm around his midsection, and though there wasn’t as much bitterness as there usually would be, Roman still picked up on it loud and clear.

He inclined his head, as if in agreement, and Virgil stomach only sunk a little bit before Roman was speaking again.

“That’s where you’re wrong, Virgil. You see, there seems to have been a grave misunderstanding. This is how I’m partially responsible for your passing out, same as Logan and Patton are also partly to blame.”

Virgil’s eyes widened, breath hitching at the sheer ridiculousness of that suggestion. No!! How could it be their fault? He’s the one that got so sick and couldn’t keep himself healthy enough not to fucking pass out. He opened his mouth to say as much, but Roman held up a finger before he could get out a single word, silencing him.

“A few days ago, 5 to be exact, it came to Patton’s attention that you weren’t feeling yourself. He told me and Logan that you told him you weren’t feeling very well, and that we should all give you some space the next few days.” Roman said carefully. Ah yes, that conversation. The one that’s haunted Virgil for nearly a week. Virgil remembered it well.

With a hesitant, still very lost nod from Virgil, Roman continued. “It seems that Patton, and in turn, Logan and I, assumed that your strange behavior was linked to.. well, anxiety.” He gave Virgil’s hand a light squeeze, any sign of a smile gone and replaced with pained regret. The Prince swallowed, just as Virgil pieced it together.

“Because of these more stressful times Thomas is experiencing, we wrongly thought that you were having a rough week, leading to worse anxiety. So… we’ve been leaving you on your own, thinking we were helping you..”

Virgil.. didn’t know what to say. He looked up and found Roman’s red, sorrowful eyes. When he focused, he could see they were just a little bit bloodshot, even in the dark. Proof that he had previously cried, no doubt about this. When Virgil didn’t speak, still too shocked as his slowed brain processes this, Roman continued, quietly choking back a sob just after he averted his gaze to the floor.

“V-Virgil-“ he voice cracked. Virgil’s heart was sinking in his chest. Roman had never looked so heartbroken. “Virgil I’m so sorry, I had no idea you were sick, none of us did! I-I swear I didn’t know, I would have never left you alone if I had, Virgil, Star, i’m so so s-sorry,”

Roman was practically full on crying by that point, though he clearly tried to keep it to himself and stay quiet. Virgil was grateful for the effort, but there were much more important things to focus on at the moment. He may not be completely himself, but he still couldn’t let Roman be so sad.

It was because he wasn’t completely himself that Virgil automatically sat up (taking his time to do so, trying not to upset his head), and leaned himself right against Roman, chest to chest, looping his arms around to loosely hold Princey in a hug.

It all made sense now, why he’d been ignored all week, and why nobody came to check on him or try to help. He felt a little (read: a lot) stupid for thinking that anyone in his famILY would do anything but show him the upmost care and attention when he needed it. They thought they were helping, and honestly, had he in fact been having a bad week of heightened anxiety, giving him space would have been the right thing for them to do.

Roman was quick to return Virgil’s hug, though to his credit, his hug was a lot stronger and more secure than Virgil’s. He buried his face in Virgil’s hair, a steady stream of teary apologies spilling from him. A steady stream that Virgil hastily tried to end.

“Roman, it’s okay… i’m not upset, I promise it’s okay. I know you were doing what you thought would help me. Please don’t cry, Princey.” He said softly.

It might have been a few more minutes, or a few hours, that the two sides sat together in each other’s arms. Roman’s cries and apologies slowly quieted to a stop, though the gentle combing of fingers through Virgil’s hair only continued as they sat.

“Hey… Roman?” Virgil whispered after a few more moments, the whole mindscape quiet, save for the quiet sniffles from both Virgil and Roman every once in a while.

“Yes, sweet Midnight?” came an equally gentle response. Neither side moved, Virgil too content with his face snuggly buried against his counterpart’s shoulder, and Roman too content with having Anxiety safe in his arms.

“Would… well, you can say no, but would you mind.. if I stay in here..? I don’t… really want to be alone…” a hint of Virgil’s usual anxious tendencies showed itself despite the tiredness that was starting to cover the darker side. Instead of head-swimming exhaustion though, this time Virgil felt pleasantly heavy and relaxed.

Without uttering another word, Roman pulled them both down to lay their heads on the pillows, lifting one hand to gently flick his wrist and manipulate the covers around them. The light in the bathroom turned off with a soft click of Roman’s fingers, one that Virgil hardly registered as he shuffled somehow closer to the Prince, still tucked safely in his arms.

As he fell softly and smoothly into the first restful sleep he’s had in days, Virgil noticed that he wasn’t freezing cold anymore. The dull throb in his head had gone away almost entirely, and it felt that much easier to breathe. But most importantly, Virgil felt less alone than he had in a long, long time.

Needless to say, Virgil was feeling better already.

[amor-immortalem]

Everything Undesired Chapter 3

Chapter 2

“So what’s the plan?” Beel asked as he and Satan followed Lucifer to the Demon Lord’s castle.

“I say we go for an instant kill,” the Avatar of Wrath smirked, “make an example out of them.”

"I'm hungry enough I could swallow them whole." Beel commented.

"No, a quick death is not what they deserve even if they'll find themselves stuck in the eternal torture they so rightfully deserve once they reach Asmo's court in the second layer." Lucifer stopped and turned to his brothers, a knowing smile graced his lips, "Rather, we'll torture them slowly. We'll make them suffer for every bit of pain they've inflicted on our brother before we even allow Asmo to deal with them. "

The demons nodded as the doors to the castle swung open. There waiting for them was Diavolo's ever so capable butler, Barbatos.

"Good evening," The ancient demon smiled, "Here to see the young Lord, are you?"

Lucifer would only nod as Barbatos led the way.

Levi paced about outside Mammon's room. How does he even begin to approach this? The thought was almost enough to send the Avatar of Envy scurrying back to his room.

"No, Levi your brother needs you right now! Ruri-chan would never leave someone who needs her behind so you won't either!" He took a couple deep breaths before opening the door and hit his brother who was coming out of the bathroom with the door. Mammon stumbled and just barely caught himself before he could take a tumble down the stairs.

"Damn, Levi," the Avatar of Greed groaned as he held a hand to his lower back. "It's like you're tryin' ta take me out..."

"I'm sorry. I thought you were still in bed and I-"

"It's fine. I've had worse, what's another bruise?" Mammon attempted to force a smile- to crack a joke as he leaned against the railing. "So what's up? Need something?"

"We all know what happened to you, Mams..." Levi frowned. "Asmo figured it out when we were having a family meeting while you were out of commission." He only watched as his older brother shoulders tensed up before relaxing.

"It's funny right?" He let out a bitter laugh, "I'm s'pposed ta be this big strong demon, but I end up getting tied down and used like a glorified sex toy- a cheap whore... fourth most powerful demon in the devildom my ass."

"No, its not funny." the purple haired demon frowned. "We all feel so bad for you. Personally, I can't even begin to imagine what you went through. I feel bad. There were a lot of nights were I saw you coming home super late. Part of me wonders if I had reached out to you then if we could've found out sooner..."

"It wouldn't have done anything... They ordered me not to talk." Mammon had a distant look on his face. "Even if I could've, I wasn't really all that there. After the third time, it just got to be too much and I just checked out. I don't actually remember coming home most nights... just waking up in bed like it was all some horrible nightmare..." At this, Mammon started to move down the stairs and took a seat on one of the couches.

Levi followed him down, talking a seat on the opposite end of the couch. "Why did you do this to yourself? The not eating and sleeping I mean."

"The nightmares just got to be too much so sleeping just became not worth it and I don't really know why I started starving myself.... one day I just... couldn't eat- at least not more than a few bites every couple of days anyway. If I had anymore than that it was hard to keep down. Maybe it was the guilt I felt that was making me sick..."

At his brother's word's the demon cocked a brow. "Guilt? Why do you feel guilty? You didn't do anything wrong."

"I feel like I cheated on Arella- like I didn't love her enough to fight harder against the witches. Levi, ya don't understand. I finished- multiple times at that so I must've enjoyed it deep down..."

The Avatar of Envy's jaw dropped at that statement. "That doesn't mean anything! So what if you finished? It was just a physical reaction to a stimulus. Its the same as sneezing when someone tickles a feather under your nose. A-and cheating's only a thing that can happen when both parties consent to it. It doesn't count if you get raped- at according to humans anyway."

"It still doesn't change the way I feel though. Honestly, I'd be surprised if she still even wants me at this point."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm damaged goods, Levi. You know what women down here are like- humans can be like that too... they don't want a guy who can't protect himself from somethin' like this cause that means he can protect him."

"Yeah but not Arella!" Levi stood up a deep frown on his face. "She's different and you know it. I can't believe you would even say that about your own girlfriend."

Mammon only frowned at him. He grabbed a blanket that had been draped over the back of the couch and cocooned himself in it. "I know 's a stupid thing to think, Levi, but 'm not used to someone like her. If I was datin' any other girl she'd have left me on the spot."

"I-I'll be back," Seeing his older brother this way, seeing the Avatar of Greed in this bad of shape, the purple hair-demon realized he was not the person most equipped to deal with this sort of thing. Instead he would go get Asmodeus, certain that the Avatar of Lust was the only person who could really help their brother. "I'm going to get Asmo."

Mammon would only watch his brother go silently. In all honesty, he was greatful to his little brother coming to see him. He did need someone to echo the words his human had said to him earlier even if he himself wasn't yet convinced.

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"Asmo, there's an emergency!" Levi just barged into his brother's room as Amsodeus looked up to him.

"What happened? Is Mammon alright?" Asmo looked up at him, pink to yellow gradient eyes filled with worry.

"Physically but he's in a real bad place mentally." Levi looked down. "Even back when our insults got to him so bad he wanted to.... unalive himself, he was never this bad. Arella’s still busy with making food for him and I wasn't any help, but as the Avatar of Lust you know so much more about how to help a victim than I do."

"That was the next stop I was planning to make after gathering up my nail polish and other tools but all that can wait, I suppose." He gave Levi a reassuring smile. "As long as you attempted to reassure him that this was never his fault to begin with you've done more than enough." The demon rose placing a hand on his older brother’s shoulder. "Don't worry, Levi. We'll get our brother back to his old self eventually- It make take a few years and many late night talks with all of us but it will happen. Given the right support, a victim can heal. Maybe not completely, but at least enough where its not the only thing they think about and Mammon has always been a resilient person.

The Avatar of Envy only nodded as he and the strawberry blonde demon walk out of his room together.

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"Mammon, I'm back," Arella called as she entered the bedroom carrying a tray with two bowls of cup noodles placed on it. When she noticed him starting blankly at the screen of his D.D.D, her stomach dropped at the thought of those monsters daring to contact him again. She made her way down the staircase as quick as she could without spilling the bowls on the tray. When she got to the glass coffee table, she placed the tray on the table and placed a hand of his shoulder. "Give me your phone, Love." It was an order Mammon was all to eager to follow, practically shoving the device into her hands as he buried his face in his hands. "I made you two cups. Eat as much as you can, even if its only a few bites."

"I'm sorry. Please don't be mad. Don't leave me because of this..." The demon's voice quaked as he looked up at her.

"I promise I won't. No matter what's on this screen, I'm not leaving you for anything."

He could only nod as he picked up a cup as Arella took a look at his phone. She frowned at the messages on written in the group chat.

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Next

Masterlist 2

[mashiraostail]

Hi Den! I just saw your depressive reader request and I really appreciated it, of course and your other contents, they were amazing. I wasn't really feeling myself lately and seeing the characters comfort the reader, believe me it really helps me, especially I'm going through a big test right now. I was wondering if I can request a Vlad King version, or any other characters you have in mind? I really wanted to be in his big arms, if no then it's ok too💗please stay hydrated at these times and be safe, I'm looking foward to your great work💗

 Hi! I'm really glad you liked them! I have another ask looking to get Mic and Yagi so I’ll add them here too, i hope your test goes well! 

Sekijiro Kan / Vlad King Hindsight is always much clearer. You wished you'd started the assignment when you got it rather than continually putting it off, but no, so everything had piled. You somehow managed to churn it all out the night before but it left you thoroughly exhausted. So much so that you end up flaking on your plans with Sekijiro, he doesn’t seem too perturbed on the phone though, he knew you had a lot of work right now, he’s been guilty of the same thing on occasion.  Though that was a week ago. Nothing particularly devastating had happened, nothing out of the ordinary, and yet you just felt so exhausted. Everything was a chore to you. Which made staying in bed with the lights out for days on end incredibly easy. But it made doing laundry, changing your sheets, doing the dishes, and even just finishing a glass of water basically impossible. All you had the energy to do was get up, go to your job, and come straight home and get back into bed. If your coworkers noticed your rapidly declining state no one said anything.  It was rare for Sekijiro to go more than a few hours without at least a text from you. You sent him literally whatever crossed your mind, pictures, random ideas or thoughts, questions about what you should eat for lunch or dinner, should you get mocha in your coffee or vanilla? You also usually called him when you were doing some sort of mindless task, cooking or cleaning and other things of the like. Not to mention how often you saw each other, practically everyday you usually stopped in on him while he was paroling, or asked him to come to your place when he was done. Now he was going full days without hearing from you at all. Since you’d given him a raincheck on your plans earlier last week he’d hardly heard from you. He texted you first of course, he’d asked how you were feeling numerous times now, but you always just said ‘I’m alright’ or ‘a bit exhausted’ at the worst before turning the conversation around to him again.  “You look nervous.” Aizawa doesn’t look up when he speaks, but it was an elephant in the room. Sekijiro was sure everyone had noticed how often he was checking his phone, or the nervous jitter in his leg every time it went off. “Yeah big guy what’s got you so rattled?” Mic agrees from his spot beside Aizawa in the teachers lounge.  “Nothing really.” Vlad cracks his knuckles, a nervous habit. “I bet you told Ryo. You shouldn’t play favorites it’s-”  “I didn’t tell him and I don’t play favorites.” He cuts Nemuri off.  “Is it romance troubles?”  “Why do you always take it there, Midnight?”  “So it is.” She looks proud, “I don’t always take it there, I just have a keen eye.”  Sekijiro lets out an empty huff of a laugh, “sure.”  “Maybe we can help.” If anyone but Aizawa said that Sekijiro would have written it off. It’s not that Aizawa wasn’t a nice guy, he was a hero after all, but for the most part he liked to keep to himself. Him offering help must have meant that Sekijiro was jumpier than he’d previously thought. “I have this...friend..and they’ve just been sort of MIA lately is all.  I don’t wanna barge in on them but they’re just not acting like themselves. I’m worried I did something to offend them, or that they’re hurt or sick and not telling me, when I ask they just write it off. I don’t want to seem like I don’t trust them but something just feels wrong.” Now that he said it out loud this did sound like the type of thing Ryo would have been really useful for, though that in mind Ryo knew you better than the others, the chance of him just barging in on you was much higher. The trio ponders this new information before Mic seems to have a lightbulb. “Why don’t you go there with a gift? That way it’s less like barging in and more like surprising!” Mic jumps, holding up an inquisitive finger, “or bring some take out or something like that!”  “That’s..not a bad idea..” Sekijiro murmurs to himself, it wasn’t out of character for him to surprise you at random times either...  “Great. Why don’t you head out now?” Aizawa offers and Sekijiro turns to him.  “No I mean, I would but I agreed to stay back for my class so they could use the-”  “We’ll be here for a while.” He’s curt but his kindness isn’t lost on the taller hero.  “Thank you Eraser. I really appreciate this, I’ll repay you.”  “Don’t mention it. If this’ll get you to stop shaking like a wet dog all the time.” He mutters to himself turning the paper before him over, “let us know if we can do anything else.”  You were starving. Yet you didn’t have a single morsel of food in your whole apartment, not even a jar of peanut butter. The hunger pains in your stomach weren’t enough to motivate you to venture out into the world, the terrible gloomy weather wasn’t helping either. You rolled onto your chest with a groan, wondering how much longer you could go on like this. Maybe after work tomorrow you could stop some place and pick up some groceries, for now though sleep was a great distraction.  Despite having a key Sekijiro still knocked, though after receiving no reply he elected to let himself in.  It seems like you’re in, your shoes are by the door, and your key is on the hook above them, but the coffee table is covered in plates, utensils and half empty cups of water or juice, your favorite blanket was strewn haphazardly over the couch, dangling onto the floor, you normally folded it neatly and draped it over the back. Your work papers and other things were cluttering the arm chair on the far end of the room and there were various wrappers around the floor and couch.  “Hello?” Sekijrio calls out for you but gets no reply. He clears a spot on your coffee table for the take out he brought and sets the other bag of various odds and ends on the couch before setting to straightening up. If you were asleep, which is what he figured, then you probably had a cold or something. He doesn’t wanna clean everything, incase you..liked it like this? He’s not sure himself but maybe you were trying something out. He empties the glasses into the sink and cleans them and the utensils off before discovering you had literally no food in your whole apartment. This was becoming concerning.  “Hey..” He knocks on the slightly ajar door of your bedroom, there’s no light coming from inside.  “I’m gonna come in alright?” He nudges the door open with his shoulder and the light from the hallway illuminates you, asleep. You didn’t look sick, though somehow you still looked worse for wear.  He shuffles over to you, “hey you?” He crouches down but keeps his voice low, “wake up.” He doesn’t want to startle you or anything. His efforts are fruitless. He straightens up and looks around a bit, pondering his next move.  He elects to climb into bed with you, he isn’t sure why he does this, but it feels like the right move. He carefully maneuvers your limp and sleepy form to rest against him. You start to mumble sleepily, still deadweight stacked against him, “Sek?” You’re wrapping an arm around his ribcage.  “Hey’re you up?” He looks down to you, only to find you are in fact not up. So he stays like that for a while, holding you by the back of your head to his chest, his other hand running long strokes over your spine, he could reheat the take out for you when you woke up.  When you do wake up you’re fully prepared for the terrible pang of hunger to be the first thing that you feel. But instead you just feel warm, you didn’t remember bringing a heavier blanket in here with you, but the warm weight on your back was comforting and...moving? Why was your blanket rubbing your back? The next thing to hit you was the scent, warm and piney to mask a slight metallic twinge, it was Sekijiro’s.  “Hey you’re awake.” His hand halts, “sorry to barge in like this.”  “it’s...okay.” You wipe your eyes and sit up, his hand slides off your back and wraps around to hold your waist.  “You feeling alright?”  The hunger hits you then.  “Honestly? No..” You’re straddling his leg, hands resting on his stomach.  “Yeah, I had a feeling. What’s up? It didn’t feel like you had a fever.”  “I’ve just been exhausted lately, Everything’s a chore. It’s all piling up and I have no motivation, and then I isolate myself and that doesn’t help.” You scrub your face. It clicks for Sekijiro then.  “Oh.” He sits up, “oh.” He holds either of your arms in his hands, “why didn’t you say something sooner? I would have come to help.”  “I didn’t wanna be a burden or seem childish, normally I can be pretty high functioning when I get like this. I’m still going to work and all so I figured I’d just pull out of this slump and then..apologize to you for being so aloof. I just-” Your stomach growls.  “And another thing! You don’t even have a crumb of food in here!” Sekijiro scolds you, “seriously I was worried sick when I got in. And you’re starving! You could have asked me to bring you something!”  “I didn’t wanna bother you, especially when I was being so cold I-”  “Okay. Don’t work yourself up.” Sekijiro uses the hand not being held by you to pull your bedhair back from your face, “well I brought food anyways. We can heat it up. So why don’t we talk after you eat?” “I’d... rather talk now..” You murmur, holding one of his hands in both of yours, “I’m really sorry Sekijiro. I shouldn’t have acted like that. I should have called you and explained and-”  “That’s a lot easier said than done babe.” Sekijiro stops you, “I won’t say I wasn’t worried, I was. Aizawa even said something to me.” He laughs a little, “but...this isn’t always something you can help. I didn’t wanna seem like I didn’t trust you by just barging in so I let it go on too long. I’m sorry for not coming sooner even though I was worried.”  “It’s not your responsibility to-”  “Shush. Anyways, now I know this kind of thing can happen from time to time, are you okay with me coming to check on you if I’m worried?”   “Of course I am..” You lean forward and drop your head onto his shoulder,  “I’m sorry too, for shutting you out and being cold..I didn’t make you think I was mad at you did I?”  He laughs, “It had..briefly crossed my mind.”  “I’m sorry Sek..” You wrap your arms around his back, you feel it shake with quiet laughter.  “It’s alright. Everything is fine now. You must be starving though, do you feel better? Enough to eat at least? Let’s go out to the couch, a change of scenery may do you good?”  You agree blindly, affectionately leaning into him as he rubs your back, truthfully you weren’t even sure what you agreed to until you were rounding the corner to the living room.  “Oh no it’s-” Not half as bad as you thought?  “I just picked up some stuff while you were asleep.” He waves, “I left your work stuff and the blanket, I know you can be particular about them. Get comfy and I’ll go heat this up.”  You sit on another bag by accident, curious you peek inside to find a niche collection of aspirin, a heating pad, and some socks among other things. You can feel your eyes getting wet.  “Hey why don’t you pick a movie too?” He’s coming back with two plates, “I can even give you a pass this time I won’t mind if you fall asleep because I-”  “Did you get all this for me?” You scrub at your eyes and he rushes over, quickly setting the plates down.  “W-well yeah I though you were sick!” He pulls you forward again, into his chest, he wraps his arms around you, “what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”  “It’s just really nice of you-” You sniffle, carding your hand through the back of his hair, “thank you for coming Sek.”  “Well..yeah of course I came babe. I’ll always...geeze, don’t cry..I didn’t wanna make you cry. Come on buck up.” His hands are sort of aggressively rubbing your back, but it’s actually kind of comforting..  “You could never bother me with something like this. I wanna help.”  “I’m sorry.” You pull away and wipe your face after he squeezes you one last time, “sorry I’m..I don’t know why I’m so emotional right now-” You sniffle and look up at him, “I'm such a baby aren’t I?”  “No..I don't think so.” He reaches out and nudges a tear with his knuckle, “I think it’s sweet. Babies are cute anyways.” His palms cup your face and his thumbs rub comforting strokes over your puffy cheeks, “let’s eat, okay? Put on a movie and you can fall asleep again if you want, I’ll even carry you to bed after. Tomorrow we’ll both go to work and then come back here and start getting you back on track alright? You’d help if it were me so don’t worry about troubling me. It’s really not any trouble at all. I feel better knowing you’re taken care of so really you’re doing me a favor.” 

Hizashi Yamada/Present Mic The pair of you were quite literally inseparable. You called each other during every commute, texted and chatted throughout the entire day. So when he started lamenting to Aizawa that you’d pulled away a bit Aizawa told him to buck up, you probably just needed time to recharge. He’d been friends with the voice hero for over a decade now and even he needed to take time to himself on occasion, and he didn’t see Hizashi half as often as you did sometimes. He always reassures Hizashi that loudness can be exhausting but that doesn’t mean he’s disliked, sometimes people just can’t match his energy. That was probably the case now. While that put him slightly at ease he was still a bit disgruntled. You’d never had an issue talking to him about this sort of thing before, you were always the first person to ask him to quiet down, or to lower his energy level, and usually you were the one of the few who could do it in a way that was somehow sweet rather than hurtful. The fact that you were plain ignoring him now sort of...actually hurt his feelings. You answered his texts, though usually with much less gusto than before, and you always cut your talks on the phone short with some random excuse, ‘i think someone is at the door’ or, ‘sorry someone else is calling me’ or ‘my phones about to die’ and so on. When he asked to see you you deflected, you had a migraine, you were backed up at work, you wouldn’t be home till later, you had to get up early the next day, any excuse under the sun to take a raincheck on him. He spent about 2 days brooding over it, genuinely hurt by your actions and wholly unsure of your intentions.  To be honest, his high energy, loudness, and general excitability was exactly what you needed right now. You never had trouble asking him for help with things before; Help me open this jar? Could you pick up dinner on your way back? Do you mind moving my couch please, I’m trying to redecorate.. Will you straighten my hair I always miss pieces in the back. So you didn’t know why you couldn’t ask him to just be here. You didn’t need anything else, just his company would have been nice. You’d had an awful week, there was so much to do and you could feel your interest waining as the seconds ticked by, it was normal for you to get dragged down this time of year. Your coworkers and teammates were understanding of it, everyone had their ticks and this was yours, they were happy to help pick up what overwhelmed you and you were grateful for that but at the same time guilt gnawed at you, you felt useless and burdensome, the last thing you wanted to do was ask yet another person for yet another favor. Begging for help when you should be able to do it yourself. You didn’t want to suck the energy out of Hizashi, you already felt guilty enough for leaning so heavily on your colleagues. In hindsight your reasoning would make no sense, but all you wanted to do now was isolate yourself. It was as if your growth wouldn’t mean anything if you didn’t achieve it all on your own. You’re never really sure how you reach these conclusions but in the end they always feel logical.  That being said, it didn’t feel like you were achieving much of anything right now. All of these tears were over nothing, it wasn’t anything that couldn’t be fixed but still. You’d written it all in pen, and now the error..it’s not that you couldn’t white it out, you surely could, but the white out would look sloppy now and it would be clear you made an error but you were so close to being done you didn’t want to start the whole page over. It felt like a silly thing to cry over, but you did anyways. Eventually it tired you out enough to get you to just resign to bed. Hardly past 10 pm, but bed. You needed bed. You were so wrapped up in work that you didn’t even notice him texting and calling, you hadn’t even spoken to him once today, and then when you decided to call it a night you just left your phone at your work space.  He was antsy, jumpy and even a bit irritable. Worry didn’t really begin to describe it. Eventually, late into dinner Nemuri tells him to just go to you. “Check up on them, if they really are exhausted they’ll tell you that to your face, it’s better to be safe than sorry.”  Everyone seemed to echo her sentiments, which was largely unsurprising considering his change in demeanor was probably the least refreshing thing to befall the group of teachers the semester. Dorming wasn’t entirely unpleasant, they liked each other enough, but when things like this happened everyone’s patience was tested.  He calls when he’s outside your complex, he’s mostly sure you won’t answer but he at least wanted to try before knocking, and then eventually deciding to just use his key. Not answering wasn’t going to be enough to get rid of him, he decided he was going to get to the bottom of this tonight. Even if the issues was simply that you just needed the time to recharge from him you could say that instead of just dropping off the face of the Earth, it wasn’t like you to be such a terrible communicator. Which is why he had trouble believing that as the truth, but even if it was there needed to be some sort of conversation about how this was not effective for either party because now he was mad at you and even if you had recharged sufficiently he wouldn't’ want to see you until he cooled down.  Hizashi isn’t surprised when you neglect to answer the door. He is surprised by the terrible state of your apartment though. Papers and pencils are scattered around the living room, the kitchen is practically turned upside down despite the only food on the stove being a pot of plain rice that looks hardly touched. The further he ventured into the apartment the less he worried about you being tired of him and the more he worried that something awful had happened, and he’d neglected to notice you when you were in harms way.  Your bathroom wasn’t much better than your kitchen, once neat medicine cabinet shelves were disheveled, cabinet doors were left open things were far from their usual place, not to mention the pile of laundry in the corner. He hand’t announced himself yet, normally it was the first thing he did, loud and boisterous and probably incredibly annoying to anyone but you, “I’m here, where are you?? come say hello!!” But something unsettling was constricting in him, his chest, his stomach, his throat it made his shoulders tense. Had something terrible happened to you while he was trying to give you space? Had he ignored an obvious cry for help? Was he too late? Would his neglect cause him to lose someone else? The last place to look was your bedroom, but the light was off, and it was hardly past 10, he brain wrote off any possibility of you being there, you were a historic night owl why would you be in bed at 10?  He wasn’t relieved by the lump under your covers, in-fact he’d go as far as to say his panic only rose, bubbling up to the point he could feel it behind his eyes, like some awful pounding headache, the kind you get after driving home from a loud concert and having to look at all the city lights at night, though this was much less euphoric.  “Hey?!” He can’t help tearing the covers back, flicking the lamp on, he hates to startle you, but right now startling you would be one of the best case scenarios.  You jump, it presses you back into your pillows, into your mattress, the sheets crumple beneath you, it’s just instinct, you don’t know what else to do, you throw a pillow at him.  “Get out!”  “Hey it’s just me!”  You were flinching, bracing for some sort of retaliation, though when nothing comes you open your eyes.  “Hizashi?”  “Babe, thank god,” he exhales like he hadn’t taken a breath in 10 minutes, not before pulling you up into a rib crushing hug.  “What are you doing here?” Your hands hover over his back, confused.  “What am I doing here??” He scoffs holding the back of your head, huddling you into the crook of his neck. “Looking for you! That’s what I’m doing here!” You feel a twinge of guilt at that, especially since he’s holding you so tightly, “are you alright?”  “I’m fine..Zash..I’m okay.” One of your hands fall limp into his lap.  “I was so worried.” He pulls you back, “seriously I was going insane, I thought something happened to you, you got abducted or hurt or worse I thought-” He stops himself, “please don’t ever disappear like that again.” He presses his forehead into yours, “you don’t need tot ell me where you’re going, I’m not trying to keep tabs on you, just please at least tell me you’re safe. Promise me you would tell me if you weren’t, that you’d be honest with me if you were in trouble or scared-”  “Of course I’d...Zash is something wrong?”  “I should be asking you that! Where have you been?” He’s pulling away again, squeezing your arms, “did you just get sick of me? Is this your way of-”  “No!” You jump, “no, Hizashi I’d never do that to you-”  “So then why? Why isolate yourself like this? Why would you do this? Did you just need a break from me? Was I being too loud, too much to-” “Zashi please stop you’ll make me cry-” You shake your head, “this didn’t have anything to do with you. Please stop thinking that, I’m sorry I made you feel that way I-”  “You’ve already been crying!” He’s inspecting your face, “why didn’t you call me, how long have you been upset for? Is that...” You can see the gears turning until the dots are connected.  “I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner I-”  “It’s not your fault don’t be sorry! I should be sorry I- and you-” You hiccup.  “Me? What about me?” He Looks down at you, “this is about you babe I’m fine-”  “No! You thought I was upset with you! Or tired of you! Or worse that I didn’t want to be with you and that’s not true! I worried you for no good reason and I’m sorry!”  “Oh babe...no..” He shakes his head before pulling you into another hug, “no..no way it’s not like that-”  “But it is! Isn’t it? You even asked me if you were too much lately! You aren’t you never are Zashi, there’s no such thing as you being to loud or annoying or..anything. I just want you to be yourself, I’m okay when you’re like that, getting to see you like that I.... I don’t want you to change anything, please don’t change anything-”  “Babe that’s sweet.” He squeezes you, you feel his lips on your temple, "but I’m worried about you. What happened to make you so emotional?”  “I just got overwhelmed. I hate this time of year.” You fist his shirt in your hands, “work was too much. Everyone is nice, they understand, but somehow I feel even worse taking help from them. It feels like if I can’t pull myself up on my own it makes me weak, it doesn’t count if I don’t do it by myself. Which is why I didn’t call you. Or text you, or try to see you at all. I was already leaning on so many people I didn’t want to take from you too. I didn’t wanna suck up your extra time, you energy I...you’re my boyfriend not my caretaker I just-”  “Stop me if I’m butting in unfairly.” He rests his chin on your head, “and I mean this respectfully. But that’s stupid.”  “Asshole! I just poured my heart out to you don’t call it stupid!” You shove him.  “Hey let me finish!” He catches your hands before you can get up, “it’s stupid because I lean on you all the time.” He pulls you forward again, “are my accomplishments null because you help me out all the time?”  “Zash When do I ever-”  “Don’t even finish that sentence. And don’t answer a question with a question.” He scoffs, “you help me out all the time. Even if it’s not always big emotional stuff...babe this past week’s been hell without you around. Even things that feel small, like making a bed, or doing laundry or running a bath for someone make a huge difference, they mean a lot to me and knowing I’ll get to see you has always helped my mood. I lean on you for stuff like that constantly. But I don’t feel guilty because I know you like doing it. So don’t feel guilty when it’s the other way around, I wanna give too, I want you to lean on me, to take from me. Seriously, nothing would make me happier than knowing I helped you.”  “I’m sorry I pushed you-”  “Don’t cry over that!” He laughs, “god you’re sweet. It’s okay. I was being mean. I shouldn't have said it like that. Anyways you never answered my question.”  “What question?” You look up at him.  “Are all my accomplishments null? Because I lean on you? because I need you?”  “...well it’s not-”  “It’s a yes or no question. It is the same. It’s okay to need help, more than just opening a jar. It’s okay to need support, that’s normal. No one is meant to do it all on their own. So yes or no?”  “...no you’re right. No.” You turn into his chest and he plaits his fingers through  the crown of your hair.  “And you’ll always be there for me right? Because you love me, don’t you?”  “Of course I’ll always be here for you. And don’t ask a question like that you know I love you.” You mutter, ducking closer towards him and wrapping your arms around his ribs, “i’m sorry I didn’t call. You really didn’t think I got sick of you right?”  “No.” He swings his legs onto the mattress and lays back with you, “Shota and the others said you probably just needed a break but it didn’t really sit right with me, you’re the only person who never seems to need a break from me. ‘s why I showed up. To be honest I wasn’t really that worried about your wellbeing, I just figured you were swamped with work and didn’t want me worrying, but then when I saw..you know the mess..I panicked. I thought something happened to you, and you hadn’t answered my calls all day, or even yesterday.”  “I’m so sorry-” You warble, “god I’m so selfish I shouldn’t have-”  “It’s okay. You were overwhelmed. But if this happens again just..try to let me know you’re safe okay? If you aren’t ready to ask for help...and on the topic of help, how can I help now that I’m here?”  “I just wanna go to bed.” You murmur, latching onto his arm.  “Hm..nonsense. How about I run you a bath? And hey what were you crying about before?”  You flush, this was embarrassing.  “I messed up the page I was writing. But I did it in pen so I didn’t know what do to and I didn’t wanna start over because I was almost done but white out will look messy and so I got upset and then I got overwhelmed and then I started crying and then I went to bed.” You press your forehead into his arm petulantly, “and if you laugh at me I’ll make you leave.”  “I’m not gonna laugh.” He promises, “I’ll run you that bath, while you’re in there I’ll rewrite the page for you so you can stop worrying about it. But you should use pencil from now on.” He squeezes the nape of your neck, “sound like a square deal?” You silence says otherwise.  “What’s wrong?” He looks down to you.  “I want you to take the bath with me.” You mutter it, it hardly registers, “please.”  “Huh? Did you just say what I think you just said?” He looks delighted, despite his tone being almost devilish, “why would you want me to do a thing like that?”  “because..I missed you...and I still feel bad and I know you like taking baths with me and..” You look down at your hands where they’re interlocked, “and...I want you to wash my hair. I can figure out that page tomorrow or something.”  He sighs, “I can’t be mean to you when you’re being so sweet.” You get pulled along as he sits up, “of course I’ll come, and I’ll wash your hair for you.” He cups your cheek, “what else do you want? You can have anything just ask.”  “After that I...I think I just want to go to bed, and deal with the other stuff tomorrow. I want you to stay though.”  “I’m gonna have a heart attack.”  “Hey! Don’t say things like that! It’s bad luck!”  “Don’t be so sweet then!” He argues, pulling you to stand.  “Of course I’ll stay. I’ll stay tomorrow, and help then too, if you want. You don’t have to decide right now I know asking for help can be hard. In the meantime let’s just take that bath okay?” 

Yagi Toshinori/ All Might Retirement had left Yagi with some rather pleasant spare time. He’d never gotten to have many hobbies before but now he was enjoying freedoms life as All Might had never permitted. Chief among them being a continuous close proximity to you. Even though you didn’t technically live together it didn’t really feel as though either of you had a designated space either. It felt right for Yagi to be in your space, using your things, like he belonged there. It felt equally right for you to be in his space, existing and using his things as you pleased. You didn’t need permission and neither did he, it just felt right to exist around each other. Especially now that he had the extra time to spend with you and you both realized how easy and comfortable being together was. Though right now nothing felt easy or comfortable or right, your entire existence felt like a pair of jeans that was way too tight. Just taking a breath that was too deep felt uncomfortable.  Your closeness to Yagi made the shift in your mood apparent to him from the very beginning.  It was silly in hindsight. The proposal had a 50/50 chance anyways and it’s not like you had anything directly to do with it’s failure, it was just the last straw, the tiny thing that made all the other things seem huge, and as quickly as you’d realized that your mood had already plummeted. You’d run out of motivation, any drive to do anything but sleep and drag yourself to work had dissipated, at work you did what you needed to to get by and afterwards you went back to your place, even though Yagi’s was closer. Just being with someone else privately seemed like it would be overwhelming. Despite the fact that Yagi was the least overwhelming person on the planet, if anything you’d say he had the opposite effect, he was amazing at pulling your attention away from the little overwhelming details. However you couldn’t shake the gnawing nervousness that popped up at the thought of seeing him or anyone really. So when you crossed paths it was short, you poked into the school with lunch, into his place with dinner, you never stuck around to eat though. A conference call pulled you away, an important meeting you couldn’t be late for, you were catsitting and it needed your attention, you promised to call a relative and they’re just soo chatty, a late assignment needed tending to, all overused excuses that you normally practiced on everyone but Yagi, usually to get the pair of you out of an unwanted dinner or social event. You tried to avoid letting him into your apartment, you knew it was getting cluttered, you avoided the dishes and your laundry like the plague, putting another plate in the sink atop the pile only fanned your anxiety but the thought of actually cleaning it up makes you sicker than the sight of it. You tried to keep the front living room neat, luckily the overflowing sink was out of sight around a small corner, and the laundry cluttered a small closet out of sight as well. The only things out of place at first glance were the shoes, the coat rack and the copious amount of cups, cans and bottles littered around the apartment, some empty, some full, others in between.  Of course he noticed these things, to a passerby it wasn’t extreme, but Yagi sensed the shift in you like it was a shift in himself. Though you insisted it was fine, you were just exhausted, it was the busy season after all, come February things would plateau. You promised him. So he resigned, he trusted you after all if you said it was okay that must mean you were dealing with it on your own.  To be fair you were trying to. You honestly were. You just didn’t know how to ask for help in a way that didn’t make your stomach want to grow legs and run away from you. You said you were okay though, even if he didn’t totally buy it he’d wait patiently for you to tell him the problem, to seek him out. He knows how overwhelming it is for people to pry when you aren’t ready to divulge information. He doesn’t want to contribute to anymore bad feelings. However he could tell you were hiding something, still he plays dumb for your sake. He doesn’t try to poke further into your apartment, to your bedroom, or kitchen, places he’d normally allow himself without double checking with you, he doesn’t prod at you when you seem unusually emotional, when your excuse doesn’t hold up. He know’s you’ll come to him when you’re ready, at least that's the hope.  When you were like this a mediocre day is a terrible one, and a genuinely bad day is world ending. Today had been genuinely bad. You woke up early to prepare for a meeting, you put extra time into getting ready, you even stopped for a coffee at your favorite spot, all things you hadn’t had the energy to do even just a day ago, you really felt like today may be when things start looking up. But then the first coffee the barista made you was burnt, the machine was acting up, you assured her it was fine, it wasn’t her fault after all, you woke up early so you had time to wait for another one. Even that wasn’t really sullying your mood, it was nice to chat with the young girl while she remade your drink, there were no expectations of you, she didn’t care about pile of energy drink cans in your apartment, or the mountain of dishes in your sink, she didn’t even know the existed and she’d probably never consider that they did as a possibility. She was friendly and she always looked happy to see you. But then your bus was early and you missed it waiting for your coffee. You could see it receding down the street. It’s okay though, you woke up early. You had time. Then it was raining. Then the next bus arrived but skipped your stop so you had to walk. And suddenly all the time you put into your hair meant nothing.  Nothing terrible happened in the meeting, it was as lifeless and uneventful as ever, you weren’t sure what you were hoping for. And somehow your bus skips you stop again on the way home. Why hadn’t it stopped raining?  You’re about to climb into bed, drenched clothes and all when you hear someone knocking on your door. It was Yagi, you could recognize it anywhere.  “Hey Yagi I’m really-” You want to send him away, you do, you don’t want him seeing you so upset you felt like a child, but he just looked so concerned.  “I just got back.” You change your phrase last minute, “wanna come in?”  He sits on your couch, you appreciate how he doesn’t try to peek into the kitchen. You know you haven’t been subtle.  “I’ll wait here. You can go change into something warm. Please.” Yagi takes your hands, “and we can order dinner.” He wants to offer to make you tea, but something stops him from it. “You’re shaking. You must be freezing. I’m cold just looking at you. Go on, I’ll sit on the couch.” So you do what he says, sort of grateful for the demand since you would have fallen asleep like this, freezing and miserable and wet, and woken up sick the next morning.  “Much better! Good you even got a towel! Comfy?” He’s grinning at you as you round the corner, now in dryer, warmer apparel.  “Sit in front of me, I’ll dry your hair for you a little, it’s still dripping.” You nod as you follow his directions, any excuse to not have to look at his concerned face, getting out of his earnest blue gaze was top priority.  “The rain was totally out of left field huh? It even lasted all day.” His hands are big and warm, even through the towel how gentle his touch was is obvious.  “Yeah..” You draw your knees up to your chest, “I couldn’t seem to avoid it.”  “Well at least we can warm you up now.” You can tell his grinning again, trying to brighten up your mood. You felt like an ugly gloomy cloud, and he was a big bright cartoonish sun.  “Go ahead, you can lean your head on my leg, close your eyes. I can see your head drooping.”  You do that too. You sit there for a quiet 5 or so minutes, it does wonders to quell the nervousness in your stomach. You feel him pull the towel away and card big familiar hands through your only slightly damp hair. His palms are soft and comfortable against you, it feels right.  “You’re exhausted.” He observes, combing your hair off your forehead and pulling your head back a bit, closer to him.  “Mhm.” You don't open your eyes to give your minimal reply, instead thoughtlessly coiling an arm around his leg.  “Why don’t you come sit up here with me? It’ll be more comfortable. Your hair’s much dryer now.”  “You don’t have to baby me.” You stand up then, “I’m alright.”  “Ok I won’t baby you.” Yagi’s smile is soft and he casts it upwards to where you stand before him, “how about some tea? Are you up for making it? I’m still a little cold from the rain. Then after that you can some back and sit with me. Not because I want to baby you, but because I want to sit with you okay?” “okay..” You relent, “I can do that.”  “Perfect. I’ll wait here.”  You don’t know why you bit at him like that. You watch the kettle warm up as the guilt gnaws at you. It’s not like you were mean. All you did was tell him not to baby you. That wasn’t mean. You didn’t bite at him. But you kind of did. He was just trying to help. You aren’t mad at him so why are you mad? You open the cabinet. Of course there’s not a single mug to be found. You venture to the sink in search of two.  You’ve found the last one by the time the kettle starts to whistle which startles you enough to get you to drop the stupid glassware. The ceramic shattering on the floor is sort of akin to a dam breaking. Tears are stinging your eyes.  Things were looking up, Yagi was here, he was gonna take care of you, you were gonna feel better and now this stupid mug. You crouch down to pick it up.  “Are you alright? I heard a crash?” Yagi’s there, of course he is.  “Hey be careful, you’ll cut yourself.” He’s turning heat below the kettle off, "sweetheart here l-" and then rushing toward you. "I've got it." You were collecting the bigger shards in your hand. "Let me. I’ll get a broom, before you cut yourself. Please let me." He insists and you snap, ever so slightly, "Yagi. I said I have it."  “Hey, okay, it’s okay," he takes a step back, "do you wanna be alone for a minute?" He offers and you sigh, "Tosh I just-" then you slice your palm open, "oh fuck everything," you hiss and drop the bits you were holding and Yagi kneels beside you, "hey." "I'm sorry." You could feel yourself starting to cry, the stinging tears pouring out, "i'm sorry I got so short with you." "Hey it's fine, I understand." Yagi murmurs, a large hand rubbing your back, "it's alright, leave this for now so we can clean your hand up." He takes your wrist in his hand, but you don’t say anything. “Do you hear me?" "Yes." You nod, and take in a deep breath, "yes I hear you...yeah let me just get the-" "It's okay, the shards aren’t going anywhere." You just sort of stare at the muddled mess of ceramic and now a bit of blood mixed up on the floor. "Hey." Yagi takes your face in his hands, "look at me." "I'm looking at you." Your lips barely move. "No, look at me, not through me. Ignore the mug, look at me." He presses and so you do, you focus on him, his face, his eyes, his nose, his hands on your cheeks, the warmth that radiated from him. "Let's clean you up." You nod, "yeah. Sorry." "Don't be sor-" Yagi stops himself, "it's alright, not a big deal. No permanent damage. Go sit on the couch, I’ll get the first aid kit.” “My bathroom’s really-”  “It’s alright.” He promises, “it’s okay. I’m here to help you. That doesn’t bother me. None of this,” he gestures around, “bothers me. I’m here for you, whatever you need that to mean. Go sit down okay?” He wipes a stream of tears away. It’s quickly replaced but it’s a nice gesture.  You do manage to get the loudest tears out before Yagi comes in. "Alright let's see the damage." He opens the first aid kit on the arm of the couch beside him, "does it hurt?" "No-" Your voice gives your current state away. "Sweetheart.." Yagi kisses your temple, "come on.." "I'm sorry-" "I don't mean like that." "I know-" You wipe your eyes, "I know..I’m sorry I just-" He shushes you and extends a hand, you hold out your palm to him, you had pressed an old face cloth to it which did help ebb the bleeding a bit. "It's not that bad." You murmur as he wipes the blood away, "just a lotta blood.." “That’s how it always is.” He murmurs as he presses the wet cloth to the cut and pulls your hands up to his lips, kissing the damp fabric over the wound. You tilt your head at the sight of it, "I love you Tosh..I’m sorry." "It’s okay sweetheart, it’s alright. I love you too." He murmurs back, squeezing the cloth for a little longer before pulling it away. He goes through the routine you'd so regularly followed on him, before, when he was All Might all the time, cuts and bumps and head injuries that you always tended to for him, you cleaned up all his wounds before wrapping some bandage around it and kissing it, he mimics the routine on you "good?" "Good." You nod back voice soft and wet with tears. "I'm no expert but..did pick up a few things from one." He grins and you snort a little which makes him coo, "hey there's that smile 've been missing." He kisses the high of your cheek, "how do you feel?" "A little better..." You nod, "sorry you had to see that..." "I know that you feel like you have to apologize for everything but trust me okay? Stuff like this? I'll always rather help with. It's never a chore, but even if it were that’s okay. I want to be there for you." He kisses your forehead, "I wanna make you happy." "Then.. thank you I guess.." You look up at him and he wraps you in a hug. You spend a comfortable few moments there until he pulls away. "Don’t mention it...now," He stands and takes you with him, "let's go clean up the mug? Together. Then we’ll sort out the other stuff tomorrow, together too.” 

[votederpycausemufins]

I give you the final chapter of Summoning Family. It’s been a fun story, and while I have more ideas for it, there are other things I want to write. I mean, i got 114,984 words out of this thing! (so says ao3) I hope you enjoy, and read to the very end for something extra.

@petrichormeraki @helleborusangel

Grian smacked his alarm as it started to ring, making it shut up. He had been up late the night before getting everything ready. About a minute later, the alarm went off again and Grian groaned before shutting it off. The third time he sat up angrily and stared the clock down as he turned the alarm off. Why had past him set such an early alarm? They had done everything yesterday. Except get the cake. And decorate. And- okay they still had a lot to do.

Grian dragged himself out of bed and poured a bucket of water over his head to wake himself up. He then regretted that as he needed to dry his wings afterwards, but then he flew over to Mumbo’s base and barged into his bedroom. 

“WAKE UP SLEEPYHEAD!” Grian shouted at the top of his lungs to wake Mumbo up, but was surprised when nothing happened. “Mumbo!” Grian then stomped over to the bed, only to find it empty. Confused, the avian started looking through the base, eventually finding the redstoner feeding it. “What are you already doing awake?”

Mumbo jumped a little before looking over. “I could ask you the same thing. At least for me I rigged up some redstone to make sure I got up at the right time. I’ve already gathered up some supplies and in making sure I’ve got everything ready, I actually remembered to feed this place.”

“Good for you. Do you need me to get anything else? I was going to pick up the cake. Do you think Tommy remembered the message on top when ordering it. Oh no, what if he didn’t and it doesn’t-”

“Calm down Grian. I’m barely keeping myself together as it is. If it doesn’t work out, I’m sure store bought will be fine as an emergency.”

“But this is his first birthday! And it wouldn’t be fair if he got a standard one while Jrum would get a fancy cake!”

“Grian, they can’t even eat cake.”

“You’re right! Why did I even bother wanting to get them a cake?!”

“For the guests who can eat cake.” Mumbo quickly answered before continuing. “Although there is the possibility of a mineral cake. If I get some lava I could theoretically- hang on.” And he put down a shulker box and started going through it. “Of course a diamond on top since it will probably just be a cupcake or something, though we don’t want to leave Jrum out. And I think I’ve still got a chisel in my ender chest.”

“Well, It looks like you’ve got something to do.” Grian responded, feeling much calmer now that it looked like they had a good plan in place. “So even if this cake doesn’t work out, we’ll still have something good. But I’m still going to see if I can pick up the one we ordered so I’m going to run and grab that.” Mumbo half nodded, giving a slight wave, too busy planning on a mineral cake for Grum. 

Grian chuckled before making a portal and heading to the SMP. When he got to the other side, he pulled out a piece of paper. “Okay. Coordinates, coordinates… Ah, okay so the bakery is that way.” He turned in the direction of the coordinates and for a moment considered flying, but he remembered how close everything was and if he flew, he would probably pass it quickly.

It didn’t take long to actually reach the building, though Grian still double checked, even with the various signs of it being a bakery. Finally, he walked inside and went up to the counter, a bell ringing overhead as he opened the door. “I’ll be with you in a minute.” A voice from further in the building called and Grian just waited.

After about a minute and a half, a woman walked out and greeted Grian. “Hello there. Hoping to buy something or order?”

“Neither actually, I’m picking up an order. It should be under the name Tommy Innit but I’m the one picking it up.”

“Ah, yes! Tommy’s cake! I made sure to take special care of it!” The woman smiled and Grian narrowed his eyes slightly as it was a smile he was very familiar with, having used it plenty himself.

“Right, well did he remember to ask for a message to be written on top?” Grian asked, the woman shaking her head. “Right, I was worried about that. I hope it won’t be too much of a hassle to add that. I can pay extra if need be.”

“Hmm, yeah I can do that. What’s the message?”

“Well it’s… Here let me write it down just to be sure, I don’t want it wrong on such a special day.” The avian said before pulling a pen out and writing on his paper.

“Special… day?” The woman asked and Grian could hear the nervousness in her voice.

“Oh yes.” Grian couldn’t help but give a slight sly smile of his own. It looked like he’d have to get a store bought cake after all, but he wanted to see how this would go as he put the paper down. “It’s my kid’s first birthday. He’s… sort of adopted so while he’s not an infant, it’s still the first birthday he’s gotten to have so I’m making sure it’s perfect. So a simple 

Happy Birthday Grum’ will do.”

The woman stared at the piece of paper like it had just shown up and killed her family as she watched. “Right… birthday party for a child. Hmm. I think I got the design a bit wrong. Let me get you a second one. I can always comp the other person for the delay.” And she went into the back again, leaving Grian smiling. This was probably another person who had it out for Tommy, so messing with her was proving to be fun.

Listening carefully, he could pick up the woman panickedly whispering to someone else. “Jack we fucked up, Tommy’s not eating the cake, he ordered it for someone else!”

“What? Who? Ranboo or Tubbo?”

“No! I don’t even know the person out there but apparently the cake is for the birthday of a previously orphaned child!”

“Oh shit!”

“Yeah! So now we need to find a way to quickly make a non-poisoned cake before this guy gets suspicious.”

“You passed that point a while ago.” Grian called out into the shop. “I’ve done my fair share of schemes and recognize a scheming smile when I see it.”

Grian couldn’t help but smile as there was complete silence before the woman slowly came back out of the shop. “Right, so I guess, I don’t really have a cake for you.”

“No it’s fine. You said it’s poisoned? Did you use poison as a substitute for milk?”

“Well…”

“So you put both in there. That’s going to make this much easier. It always depends on the person, but milk normally stops any poisons, so a cake like that will just make someone sick for a bit but not actually poison them. Maybe just cause some nausea. It’s an easy enough fix!”

“You’ve… poisoned cakes before?” The woman asked.

“I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of… but poison cakes are not one of them, that was hilarious. Just not when it’s people I care about, which is why I even know how to fix it. Essentially we just need some milk and some netherwart. I’m guessing you have that somewhere?”

“Uh, let me check.” She turned to yell behind her. “Jack do we have any netherwart?!”

“No, but I can grab some!”

“Hurry up!”

“Yeah I know!”

The woman turned back to Grian. “So… it might take a little bit.”

Grian just leaned on the counter. “Oh I’ve got time since I don’t need to pick up a new cake. How about you start with that message and we can talk. What’s your name?”

“Uh, Niki.” The woman nervously answered as she grabbed the poisoned cake.

“Well Niki, seems like you didn’t like my brother much. I’d like to know why that is if you don’t mind.”

.

.

.

“Alright team, let’s get this place built.” Scar said as he rubbed his hands together. “We’ve technically only got fifteen minutes, so let’s make it count. Plus I managed to get a good sale out of thi-”

“Can we just start building already man?” Ren spoke up, and Scar jokingly glared.

“Oh alright. Start building!” And Scar used some vex magic to set up a little bit of localized time displacement for some super fast build mode. Though he wanted to help out as well, someone needed to stop the spell if any certain robots wandered over. And of course the only one currently around to do that was Scar, so he had to stay outside of it. Having never actually been on the outside of the spell, he got distracted for a bit watching everything happen, which was perfectly fine. Neither of the bots made their way to Aqua Town, and even if they had, Jellie was keeping an eye on things.

As things were still being built, Mumbo arrived and set down shulker boxes. “Sorry I’m late. I was up early of course, and so was Grian, but we got talking and realized there was something we forgot, so then I got busy doing that.”

“Well don’t worry about that Mumbolio, the place isn’t completely built yet, so decorating is still yet to come. The kids are still with Tommy?”

“As far as I’m aware, yes. Hopefully if they’re awake, they’re not causing too much trouble. Do you think they’re upset about not being with us for breakfast?”

Scar thought it over. “Maybe they’re a little disappointed, but I’m sure they’re happy about knowing that you’re setting something up for Grum, even if they don’t know exactly what it is.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“Yeah! Though could you also check with Tommy? I want to make sure I probably don’t have to worry about stopping the bubble and possibly also put up something for cloaking.”

“Right! Yes let me do that.” And Mumbo fumbled just a little bit before getting his comm to message Tommy. He sent a message off and waited for a bit for Tommy to respond. When one didn’t immediately come in, he got a bit nervous, but a few more minutes calmed him. “Well, they’re either still asleep or busy, so that’s probably good.”

“Good to know! Unless something changes in the next, I want to say five or so minutes, we should be good.” Scar responded, Jellie giving and approving meow as she groomed herself at Scar’s side.

“Well then I’ll keep watching for a message.”

“Got it. So, what did you get for decorations?” Scar asked, peeking into a shulker box.

“Well, his favorite colors are red and light blue, so there’s a lot of streamers and balloons and what not in those colors. Also got it in a music theme since I wasn’t sure how to make a party theme out of building.”

“Oh, that sounds nice. And got any plans for Grum?”

“Fantasy themed since he’s always going out to your village to play plus he seems to really like stories with that theme.”

“Alright, I’ll start drawing up plans for that tonight.”

“That sounds alright. Grian already sent an order in to The Boomers so this plot can be cleared again.”

“Nah, it’s fine. Keep it up. Better to keep the history around.I can sell another plot of land for the next party.”

“Well that’s very kind of you.” Mumbo started. “But again, it’s already been paid for. Though I’m sure they would be willing to listen to the change of plans.”

“Well, I normally wouldn’t suggest it, but you might buy a plot of land from Bdubs and get it cheap but using what would have gone to The Boomers.”

“Hmm, I’ll discuss that with Grian when he gets back.” Mumbo glanced down at his communicator. “Ah, they’re awake now. Tommy gave them the old reliable of a bowl or redstone though Grum got his with quartz.”

“Oh yeah, we’ll definitely finish building before they show up.”

“Then I’ll start prepping the decorations.”

.

.

.

Grian waved to Niki and Jack beforing picking up the cake box. “Thanks for the cake! And if you want to try killing Tommy again, you’ll need to try something sneakier to get past me!” Grian smiled at the pair, who gave nervous ones back. As he left, they retreated further into the bakery. To do what, Grian didn’t care since he had other things to pick up. Or rather, he had people to pick up.

Grian flew up into the air and looked around before spotting a snowy town to the north. That was probably Snowchester, which was where he was trying to go anyway. From there, flying to the town was easy, but actually knowing which house to go to was a bit more difficult. He didn’t immediately see any signs saying who lived where, so Grian’s first idea was to just knock on every door. That is, until he saw a certain ziglin looking out the window of one of the houses.

When the child saw him, he immediately started bouncing and ran off further into the house. Grian walked over to the house and knocked on the door, waiting as he heard movement inside. A few moments later, the door opened. Ranboo stood there, Michael now clinging to his leg and looking up at Grian. “Hey! I’m here to start picking people up and to be honest, this is the only place I knew to find people right now.”

“Well, I sort of know where some people are, but I can check if Tubbo is awake enough to help out with that.”

“Sounds good to me.” Grian agreed, then followed Ranboo into the house. As he waited for Ranboo to get Tubbo, the avian watched as Michael showed off some of his toys. Grian smiled and set the cake down to look at what was being shared with him. He was especially happy at the plush chicken, parroting a few clucks which made Michael squeal in delight.

Before long, Ranboo returned with Tubbo, who still looked a little tired, but was still awake and dressed. “Hey, sorry. Guess I slept in a bit.”

“No, it’s perfectly fine. I nearly did the same after being so busy the other day. We’re not supposed to start until a bit after lunch, so I’m early anyway, but Tommy’s back home and I only really knew about this place since Grum remembered it. No clue where everyone else lives.”

“Well, who all are you after again?”

“Fundy, Puffy, Wilbur, Techno and my dad.” Grian answered. “To be honest, just messaging them all would probably work if you could do that. My comm is a mess right now.”

“What happened to it?”

“I have never. Ever. In my life. Hated a chicken like the one I apparently own now.”

Tubbo and Ranboo glanced at each other. “Do we want to know.”

Grian sighed. “Probably not. It’s a long story. All I know is it messed with some ribbons, and when I tried to stop it, it broke my comm.”

“Well, I’ll message Fundy and Puffy. Ranboo, can you message Phil? I’m sure he’ll be near Techno or Wilbur, so that should get two birds with one stone.”

“Um, I’m the only other avian, thank you very much.” Grian said jokingly before he laughed. “But yeah, that sounds good to me.”

Tubbo nodded and sent some messages, Ranboo doing the same. Before long, they had responses from everyone and the only person who needed to be picked up was Techno, who was still living out in the middle of nowhere. Grian begrudgingly picked him up, dropping him on the landing absolutely completely on accident.

“Alright, I’ve got the cake, I’ve got all of you, you guys got presents or cards if you wanted to bring them?” Grian asked, looking at everyone, glaring at Techno to try and will him to not say he forgot something. Fortunately, Ranboo was the only one to have forgotten anything, and even then, Tubbo had remembered it for him. “Okay, good.”

Grian opened up a portal and gestured to it. “Alright, this should take you right in front of town hall, I’ll be the last through and lead you once I’m on the other side with you. Got it? Good! Let’s go.”

One by one, everyone made their way through the portal, the one exception being Ranboo and Michael who went through at the same time. Grian double checked everyone successfully got through before picking up the cake and- jumping as a chicken showed up, poking its head through the portal. 

“Oh come on. Go back through!” Grian tried shooing the chicken with a foot, his hands full with the cake. Instead of listening, it just hissed at him, coming all the way through and pecking at his feet. “Ow! Hey! If you don’t go through, I’m going to close the portal behind me and leave you stuck here!”

The chicken hissed again before jumping back through the portal, Grian following behind. He handed the cake off before closing the portal and taking it back. 

“So, I’m guessing that’s the chicken you talked about before?” Tubbo piped up, making Grian nod.

“Yep. Now let’s just head to the building. Follow me.” And Grian started walking, doing his best to dodge the chicken that kept following him and almost tripping him. “Please, how did you even get here from the mansion?”

The chicken of course didn’t answer, but it did move closer to where Michael was, the child enamored by the bird, especially as it currently donned a shiny ribbon around its neck. Michael wriggled to be put down, but after Grian’s reaction to the chicken, Ranboo was hesitant to let the ziglin leave his arms.

It fortunately didn’t take too long to reach the newly built building, a number of hermits on scaffolding around the place hanging up decorations. “Wait, what are you all doing? This wasn’t part of the plan.”

Etho slid down a bit of scaffolding to get down to Grian. “Yeah, well it’s a special occasion. At least it’s not another war right? But where are we putting the presents? I’ve got mine ready.”

Grian just sighed as Etho held up ribbons floating in the shape of a box. “I thought I paid for that.”

“Yeah, you did. But the kids didn’t.” Etho said, and Grian could hear the smirk from behind the mask.

“Alright fine, but there better not be any walls around.” Grian rolled his eyes and started walking towards the door.

“Wait actually there’s-” And Grian crashed into a wall of glass in front of the entrance. Etho grabbed the cake away just in time that it didn’t get destroyed, and Grian just laid on the ground.

“There’s a wall.”

“Yeah there’s a wall.”

“I hate glass sometimes.”

No one was able to stop Phil before he did the same thing as Grian and walked face first into the wall of glass he couldn’t see.

.

.

.

“Ace of spades.” Jrum said as he set down the card. To his left, Tommy smiled and put down a card of his own.

“As if that would work.” He set down an uno card. “Plus four.”

“Hey! That’s not fair!”

Tommy shrugged. “Too bad, I had it in my hand.”

“Yeah, I think it’s a great choice.” Grum nodded. “Jolteon, I choose you.”

At the same time Tommy and Jrum groaned at the card. “What the fuck Grum, I thought you were out of evolution cards!”

“Because you always forget there are branch ones.” Grum said smugly. “So that makes it your turn Jrum.”

“Okay fine! I’ve got garudamon. That’s a third stage card which stops your jolteon.”

“No it doesn’t, you used queen of hearts to get Philomena in there, so it only counts as a stage two.”

“Dammit! I forgot!” Jrum groaned, but then gestured to Tommy to take his turn.

“I play vertical half fire, half gold!”

“You added a seven dragons card to your deck?!” Jrum stomped his foot. “Where did you even get one?”

“Someone on the SMP had it for some reason. Cost a whole diamond for it.”

“Yeah, because you suck at bluffing.” Grum spoke up as he stared at his hand of cards.

“I do not!” Tommy retorted, crossing his arms.

“Yes you do. Mini outrage crowbar.” Grum put down a card which would normally be about the fourth the size of normal cards, but all of the cards were in sleeves so their backs couldn’t be seen, making it a level playing field.

“Ugh, I guess I’m down a point.” Tommy rested his head in his hand. “Fine, what do you have Jrum?”

“Battle!” He slapped down a very generic looking card. “Rock paper scissors!” Tommy threw rock while both the bots did paper. “Aww, no one did scissors!”

“Oh thank fuck. I need to draw anyway.” And instead of playing a card, he drew two instead.

“Well then that means I can play Legacy. The Revere ring means I won’t lose points the next time someone tries to take them!”

“Then I get to win!” Jrum smiled, making Grum and Tommy both look at him in shock. “I’ve got the two and a half of hearts! Steal double points if they would be protected!”

“Noooooo!” Grum groaned. “My points!”

From there, everyone dissolved into laughter and then put their cards away. “Alright, well I guess while we were playing your dad messaged me. Sounds like it’s birthday time.”

From there, Grum and Jrum stopped smiling to look at each other for a moment. “Are you sure? I mean, technically it’s my birthday, but at the same time, it’s also past then.”

“Because of the whole time thing? I mean, I guess, but did you guys actually celebrate or anything?” Tommy asked, the bots shaking their heads. “Then yeah, it’s your birthday. Don’t fight it. Even if you want to argue, pretend you don’t because you’re just going to get free shit out of it.”

“Hmm… I do like free shit.” Grum nodded. “Alright, I’m in. Let’s go.”

Tommy smiled at how he had rubbed off on the bot before leading them towards Aquoo town. Before they even landed, they spotted the new building and headed straight there, landing in front of it. Jrum and Tommy were both excited, but Grum still looked a bit nervous about it all. “What if something happens?”

Tommy turned around and went back to Grum’s side. “Hey, nothing bad’s gonna happen. Everyone’s in one place, only death that might happen is from minigames, but I think everyone made sure to not make those. I mean, there’s even a regen beacon set up just in case. Iskall and Stress said they’re going to try and stay away just to be safe, so they’ve probably already dropped off presents.”

“Why? I messed up with making it so they couldn’t come.”

“Hey Grum, remember my beach party? How I was freaking out thinking people wouldn’t show up like with my first one?”

“Yeah.” Grum nodded.

“And how I had no reason to be? This is kinda like this. There’s no reason to freak out, it’s safe and everyone’s trying to make you happy. And it’s not like you’re the only one getting this treatment, or are you forgetting my birthday.”

Both of the bots giggled at their memories of that. “Okay, I guess you’re right.”

“Does this mean we can go inside now? I wanna sca- I mean, see who’s here!” Jrum said, bouncing a bit.

“Yeah, let’s go in.”

.

.

.

The party was extremely eventful. A number of minigames kept everyone occupied and everyone was sharing stories. A few motes of interest came up during the stories, such as the wars Hermitcraft had had as well as the fact that L’Manberg started because of a drug van more or less.

When it came time for cake, the one Niki had made was presented for the whole singing of happy birthday. They had a little trouble as Jellie decided she wanted to try and eat some of the cake while the candles were still lit, but Scar managed to pull her away. 

With a bit of help from a piece of paper being used as a fan, Grum blew the candles out. As everyone was given slices of the cake, Mumbo set a special cupcake in front of Grum that he could eat. The redstoner was about to give another one which wasn’t quite as extravagant to Jrum, but in the bot’s few moments of thinking he was left out, he stole a piece of cake and tried smashing it against his screen, only for it to disappear. “Huh… I think we can eat actual food now.”

No one was too upset about Grum getting a slice of actual cake, mainly as they were too busy trying to wrap their heads around what happened. Though it was also since Grum was the guest of honor. Before long, all the cake was eaten, no one showing any signs of being poisoned. From there, a whole cart of presents was pulled over, Grum wide eyed at the amount there was stacked there.

Grum looked at all of them, trying to decide which to grab. His eyes caught Etho’s gift and he pulled it closer and undid the ribbon. “Oh yay. Glass. How thoughtful.” Grum thanked, everyone giving Etho a few eye rolls or glares. Following that, everyone watched as the bot stared Etho dead in the eyes and ate it, Grian Mumbo and Jrum being the only ones that knew he could do that. “I eat quartz, redstone and diamonds. Why is this such a surprise?”

“Well, I guess let’s do real presents now.” Tommy said, handing an actually wrapped present to Grum. “That’s mine. I think you’ll know what to do with it.”

Grum was confused for a second before opening the present, eyes lighting up at the contents. “A stylophone! Yes I know exactly what to do with this!” Grum turned the small instrument on and tested the scale before just a few notes. “Okay, I think we want… eight ten eight ten ten eight, seven nine seven six.” He tested out the keys, glad that it sounded right, then he inhaled loudly before quickly playing the notes. 

As soon as he finished playing the notes, he, Tommy, Jrum, Tubbo and even Grian all shouted at the same time. “LET’S GO!” And the room was filled with an extremely bass boosted song for a few seconds. Fortunately, since Grian had known what was about to happen, he quickly used some Watcher magic to save the ears of everyone with advanced hearing, something that Ren was grateful for since he had already gone through this once before.

When Grum went for the next present, everything shifted a bit and out popped the head of a certain chicken from the middle of the pile of presents. “Wh- how did you get in there?!” Grian asked, trying to pull the chicken out. It just hissed and pecked at him when he tried, leaving him to pull away. 

Grum tried next and it gave no resistance, so he patted the chicken. “Were you trying to be one of my birthday presents?” The chicken gave a single cluck. “Well then, I guess Kokatori is my chicken now.”

“It’s named what?” Phil asked.

“Apparently it’s name is Kokatori.” Grian answered. “That’s what I was told when he was given to me.”

“Huh. Good to know.”

Grum’s next present was from his brother, it being a number of various cards and a new set of card sleeves. After that was from Wilbur, which was a guitar perfect for Grum’s size. Techno had found some sort of journal to give as a present. Scar gave him a diamond statue, which was also packaged together with Bdubs’ gift of lots of bedsheets, which he said were for pillow forts and not just because he had plenty of spares. Beef’s was a voucher for a piano, mainly because he couldn’t wrap it. 

There were plenty of presents after that, but once they were all unwrapped, Grian and Mumbo pulled out one more. “Alright, currently it’s just covered by blankets because we didn’t have wrapping paper to cover something this big.”

“What is it?” Grum asked, walking over to the giant present.

“Well, when building you two, there were some things we had to leave out, so this is a recreation of something we had to leave out of you.” Mumbo explained.

Grum grabbed the blanket covering the thing and pulled it off, revealing a redstone machine that he soon recognized. “My music making system! I can finally make the thing that’s been stuck in my head!”

Before anyone could stop him, Grum started messing with the machine, and before long, a music disc popped out. Tommy always had a jukebox on him in some form, so he put it down and they played the disc. “So, what’s it for?”

“Well, Dad said he wanted to make a minigame for the barge.” Grum started to explain.

“It’s a shopping experience. Not a minigame.” Grian complained, getting a few laughs.

“Yeah, anyway, he needed music for it, and I had an idea, and, well, now he’s got something for it!”

“Well thanks for that.” Grian said, taking the disc out again. “Uh, we can make copies, right?” Grum nodded. “Alright. Well, the next question is if you want to keep this here and we can change this place into a music studio for you, or if you want it at the mansion or the ruin.”

“Hmm, here works, but maybe keep it out of the way ‘cause I want to play more games with people!”

“Yeah, I’m sure everyone’s down with that.”

The presents were put aside and people either went back to games, or excused themselves if they had somewhere to be. Grian had to take Puffy back as well as Wilbur, and then Fundy left to go see Iskall, Grum being understanding that he wanted to be with someone who wasn’t there and he knew longer.

Though he didn’t officially leave, Phil still stepped outside to get away from the noise of the party. When it was quiet enough, he pulled out a communicator and flipped through the contacts, finally reaching one he hadn’t touched in a long time. He pressed the call button and held the comm to his ear, waiting as it rang.

“Yeah, hello?”

“Hey, it’s Phil.”

“Phil? Hey, haven’t heard from you in, what, how many years?”

“Who knows. Just, A lot has happened recently and-”

“Hey while I’d love to talk, I’m sort of running out of battery and I’m currently the prisoner to some pirates who hurt my dragon and got them to fly off. I can call you back when I can, but for now it’s got to be quick.”

“Finally found Xelqua, I’ve got grandkids, looks like there’s a spy here.”

“Haven’t killed the spy yet?”

“Yeah that’s an issue because one of the grandkids likes it and has it as a pet now.”

“Oh wonderful. Whose kid by the way?”

“Xel’s.”

“Huh, thought he’d still be in jail. I didn’t think he had any sort of bail.”

“Wait, what are you talking about? You knew where he was this whole time?!”

“I sent you letters. I mean, before I moved to Minecrack, I was still doing my tv series. I’m actually back to doing it, which is where I am right now.”

“So one of your letters actually said you knew where he was? Now I wish I had read them all. Why couldn’t you just text or call for something important?”

“Because you never know what a spy can get into with all those digital things. The one you’ve got could-”

“Could what? Hello? Paul? Are you there?” Phil sighed and put his comm away. “Right, guess the batter died. Guess that’s something I’ll have to look into.”

.

.

.

The sun wasn’t quite setting when the party officially ended, but it was getting late. Everyone headed home left, Though Ranboo and Tubbo stayed behind to let Michael and the bots have a sleepover. Grum was especially excited about it when Grian came back from taking everyone home and seeming a bit out of it.

“Does this mean we can have a cuddle pile?” Grum asked, getting a nod from Grian.

“Oh hell no. I’m too manly for cuddling.” Tommy tried to argue, but GRum went over to him and gave him big puppy eyes.

“Please? It’s still my birthday.”

“...Fuck you.” Tommy replied, failing to the eyes with a sigh. “Alright fine, but the couples better not get too lovey dovey and shit.”

“No promises.” Grian said, tiredly. “But speaking of, where’s Mumbo?”

“Daddy said he was putting all the presents in some shulker boxes.” Jrum answered. “Amd I gonna get as many presents as Grum did on my birthday?”

“Yup.” Grian answered. “Welp, now that we know where he is, time to go to the mansion.”

Instead of flying them there, Grian just used a bit of magic to teleport them to his nest platform, flopping down on the hay a moment later. Tommy went and got blankets since he knew where they were while Tubbo and Ranboo watched over the bots and Michael as they played. Kokatori had also been brought along and played with the kids, though any time Ranboo or Tubbo got too close to it, it hissed at them.

Eventually Tommy returned with blankets as well as Mumbo, who had returned and helped Tommy with the blankets. Before long, everyone was curled up in blankets or wings or arms. Tommy was the last to fall asleep, thinking about how it all started when he and Grian were hanging out here. Now, here they were, a few weeks later with more friends and closer together.

Tommy shifted a little to pull one of Grian’s wings over him as a blanket, then finally fell asleep, and everyone was quiet.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Except…

With everyone asleep, Kokatori carefully got out of Grum’s arms and hopped out of the nest. It opened its wings and let a communicator fall to the floor. Opening it up, it saw the most recent use: a phone call in the middle of the party. Just what they were after.

.

oh whoops, I’ve got a sequel planned.

[thelittleredheadedmusician]

some original nonsense

“I’m so glad I get to be here for this,” Eve practically flung herself onto the couch, bouncing slightly before settling. She’d just gotten dropped off after rehearsal and was miraculously still teeming with energy. 

Clara pursed her lips, an obvious attempt to cover up a smile. They’d spent the day helping Eli and Ann track down paperwork and somewhere between the borough hall and stopping at the deli for lunch had been seen by Oliver’s parents. Who forced him to introduce them to Clara and insisted she come for dinner. Ann managed to talk her way out of it by vague statements of “being with her family right now” that had the McNally’s cooing in understanding. Clara couldn’t manage the same without raising too many questions. At least not that quickly. 

So, she’d spent the evening at the farmhouse and then had herself talked into spending the night. The whole experience was odd, Clara settling somewhere between her true sharp self and the doe-eyed charming he’s seen her present herself as. Oliver had the sense that it was strange for her too and that Clara was navigating uncharted waters as she ate his mom’s chicken alfredo. 

But after dinner his parents retreated to the office that used to be the dining room, claiming to be going over paperwork but probably watching House Hunters or something. Leaving the living room to “the kids” which fit when Eve came barging in. 

“I was so worried you would be gone when I got home,” she told Clara, having latched on to the older girl a few days before. 

“I was somehow convinced to spend the night.” Clara narrowed her eyes, brows drawn low as she tried to puzzle out exactly how that had happened. It made her freckles scrunch up into an indistinguishable blur. 

Eve nodded sagely and began wrapping herself up in one of the afghans from over the back of the couch. “Yeah, they do that. It’s a weird quirk of being the ‘cool parents.’” Oliver knew by her tone that she was using air quotes but from the cocoon his sister had made herself it was hard to tell. 

Oliver finished tweaking the playlist he’d made, deciding to kill as many birds with one stone as possible, and pressed play. Rising from his crouch next to their entertainment center to go sit on the couch on Clara’s other side. The music began to play through the living room’s speakers and Eve giggled madly. 

Clara turned to give him the most suspicious look he’d ever seen, and that was saying a lot based on the past week’s events. “I know this song. Maybe. It sounds familiar.” 

Shaking his head, Oliver barely managed to contain his laughter. “Nope.”

The lyrics started and the look of baffled confusion that overcame Clara was the best thing he’d ever witnessed. She froze, shook her head slightly, narrowed her eyes, and then finally turned to him in betrayal. “When did this happen? I was just in Constantinople... When was I in Constantinople?” 

Eve squeaked, high and long as she inhaled. Unable to hold in her own laughter any longer. Oliver managed to remain silent though he was shaking and his stomach ached at the strain. 

“This isn’t funny,” Clara insisted. Her glare wasn’t that harsh though so Oliver didn’t relent. “Oliver!” she scolded. “It’s not funny!” 

“No, it’s hilarious,” he said between gasps of breath. “And it only gets better.” 

~

“Russia’s favorite love machine?” Clara looked like she was going to be sick. “I mean, I might have actually met Rasputin but honestly he was disgusting. And smelt terrible.” 

It was Oliver’s turn to look on in horror. “Of all the things you managed to miss, you met Rasputin?” 

“Possibly,” Clara said sheepishly. “It could’ve just been a drunk.” 

One day, Oliver would stop being shocked by things Clara said. But apparently not today. 

“Ok,” Eve interrupted, “but thoughts on the song?” 

“It’s... good?” 

The look of pure offense Eve gave her made Oliver want to whither and he was mostly immune at that point. Eve took a deep breath, seeming to recenter herself. “It’s a certified bop, Clara.” 

~

“Ok, I’m not an idiot. I know about the Battle of Waterloo. And I’ve read Les Misérables.” Clara was unimpressed by Abba. 

“You actually read Les Mis?” Eve clearly had her own priorities. 

Oliver might not really be into theater but Eve was and he managed to pick some things up. “Ok, hold on.” He tried to do some quick math, but just asking Clara would really be easier. “When did you just... stop following cultural events?” 

She shrugged. “I don’t know, some point after the second Great War?” 

Eve and Oliver shared a look, leaning forward so that they could do so. Eve’s expression said that either Oliver handle this or she would. And also, what the heck was he planning? 

“Ok, so World War II, not second Great War. Where did you even get that one?” he tried to be gentle. But honestly, what the heck?

Clara wrinkled her nose. “I’ve outlasted entire civilizations, Oliver,” she hissed. “Cut me some slack for forgetting some terms. English isn’t even my second or third language. And you people keep changing it.” 

Oliver lifted his hand in defense. “Ok, ok. Point taken. Still, did you not pay attention to the Broadway or West End theater scenes in the 1980s?” 

“No?” Clara turned to see if Eve might be any help. Her slightly manic look meant that probably not. 

“So, you didn’t know that Les Mis is a musical?” She gasped. 

Clara slowly shook her head. 

“Ollie!” Eve screeched, but he was already standing, going to shift through the many DVDs Eve had of various performances. 

~

“Bed,” their mom said, emerging from the office. Their dad had already headed upstairs sometime during One Day More and she was currently in her pajamas. 

Eve tilted her head up, shaking off the hand that Mom was combing through her hair. “But, it’s not over!” she whined. The drums of the finale refrain of Do You Hear the People Sing were starting up meaning that it would be over very shortly. 

“And you’ve seen it a million times and have school tomorrow. Bed,” she countered. 

“Clara’s never even seen Phantom!” Eve tried to counter, which they’d discovered when Eve began rambling about actors sometime during ABC Cafe. Oliver loved his sister, he hated that he knew the names of every song in Les Mis. 

“Clara can stay up and watch it with Oliver then. Or just visit another day,” Mom glanced to Oliver with an almost apologetic tilt to her smile. 

“I can come back,” Clara offered softly. The effect was immediate. Eve and his mom both had twin smiles of pure glee. Much like Ann a few years earlier, Oliver’s friend had been officially deemed another extension of the family. Well neither girl seemed to mind so far. 

Eve launched herself onto Clara in a hug, throwing her blankets to the floor and startling the blonde. Over Eve’s shoulder, he could see Clara’s pale eyes widen and it looked like she was trying very hard not to let her shock get the best of her. They’d managed to keep his parents in the dark about the whole “technically dead” bit but Eve passing right through Clara would kind of ruin the careful charade. 

“I’ll wait until next time for Phantom,” Oliver made it sound like a chore, but he knew Eve would be pissed not to be included. And the whole experience would be more enjoyable for Clara because the two girls had talked through the entirety of Les Mis about the characters and changes from the book. He was positive watching Phantom of the Opera would be the same. 

“You’re not a terrible human,” Eve said by way of thanks. 

Oliver shrugged and their mom rolled her eyes. She started ushering Eve towards the stairs as she said her goodnights. When it became clear that Eve was still occupied squeezing the unneeded air from Clara’s lungs, she gave up. “Don’t stay up too late you two. And Eve, your butt better be in bed by the time those credits stop.” 

Clara laughed and finally began to peel Eve’s arms off her. “You should listen to your mother,” she said kindly. 

“I’m going, I’m going.” 

“If you don’t leave now I will introduce Clara to Drunk Space Pirate without you,” Oliver threatened. 

Eve gasped and leapt to her feet. “You wouldn’t.” 

“I would.” 

The two stared each other down as Eve began backing towards the stairs, almost stumbling over the coffee table in the process. “I knew you like The Mechanisms.” 

Oliver smirked. “Space operas, Eve.” 

His sister huffed and ran upstairs. Clara started laughing softly. “What was that about?” 

“I’ll explain later. I think the novelty of being a ghost would be ruined if I became one too, which would happen if I explained without Eve.” 

“Your sister does seem capable of murder,” Clara agreed. 

“I feel like all the women in my life are?” 

“Yes.” 

Oliver started cracking up at that. Clara joined him. It felt cathartic in light of... everything. Then they remembered that the rest of the house had been going to sleep so they tried to hush each other. Only to laugh more. 

Finally, they sobered and Oliver went to go get his laptop. “Do you know literally anything about the band Nirvana?” 

Clara blinked. “Do you enjoy asking questions you know the answer to?” 

Barking a short laugh, Oliver came back over to sit next to her again. “Ok, fair. But I’m going to play an ironic critic of how people respond to the lead singer’s death for you now.” 

“Why?” Clara asked incredulously. 

“I really just want to see what someone so totally removed from the situation thinks of this song.” Oliver shrugged. 

“You are very strange.” 

“And you shouldn’t throw stones.”

[flydotnet]

Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled. I don’t have any request left, so feel free to send in suggestions for this card!).

SPOILERS FOR KAZETSUYO EPISODE 20 FROM THIS POINT FORWARD. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED.

I'm not strong. I just do what needs to be done, no matter what.

I thought I was “teehee clever” when choosing to write about a canon example of Working Through the Cold (aka one of my favorite tropes ever), but all I remembered is how powerful and painful (in the best way) the 20th episode of KazeTsuyo was. Holy shit. I hesitated for a long time writing about KazeTsuyo, actually. This show, to me, as such excellent writing I could never match up against it. In the end, the plot bunny wouldn't leave after I went through The Episode:tm: for the 2nd time on my 2021 rewatch of the series, to the point I wrote this before finishing said rewatch (still have Day 2 of Hakone to rewatch - I need to get to it); so I decided "fuck it, I'm writing it", and there were are. I think I at least didn't butcher the series. It may be, huh... wack because I've been on a 2nd person POV with weird dialogue format knack lately, but I hope fellow KazeTsuyo fans who're in search/need for more content are gonna be happy with me barging into this fandom like a torpedo.

Also, man do I love Shindo (please excuse me spelling it that way: if I spell it "Shindou" like the canonical tag does, I'll be mistaken with another character, I'm dumb like that). Imean, I knew the moment I first saw him he'd at least be my favorite design, but then he just hit all my fav character soft spots: hardworking, selfless to a fault, kind, internally struggling... and I guess, yeah, episode 20 was a thing and I'm a freak. I originally planned on writing this to be a softer fic, like y'know, just writing a casual Aotake day with the prompt in mind; but I just had to be a terrible person instead. Sorry Shindo, I swear I love you.

(also, does anyone have a kazetsuyo discord server i could join because i need to scream about this show)

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They’re Waiting

Summary: No matter what happens, you will fulfill the promises you've made; even if you break in the process.

Fandom: Kaze ga Tsuyoku Fuiteiru/Run With the Wind

Wordcount: 2K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo​

AO3 version available here.

---------

The moment you woke up this morning, on the very second a hacking coughing fit erupted from your throat, you knew how difficult today was going to be – but it didn’t make waver in your resolve. If anything, it made you conscious of how far you’d be willing to go despite things getting in your way, as long as you felt a sense of duty towards them.

 No matter what.

 Yuki tries to convince you not to do that. He may have escorted you out of your room when he realized you wouldn’t be walking straight for a little while and brought you to the train station, he’s still scowling at you like you’re a child doing something he shouldn’t (which, truth be told, you are doing right now: usually, you’d be wise enough to know attempting what you’re about to head into would be a terrible idea for a multitude of factors); but you’re firm in your decision and accept a bottle of juice as you end a call with Musa.

 No matter what, you’ll do it.

 Despite how much he doesn’t want you to run, Yuki accompanies you to the Odohara Relay Station. You don’t speak a single word to each other on the ride there, with him crossing his arms and you reading your sister’s excited messages about this year’s family reunion. It’s rare so many people can gather, so they’ve clearly made an effort for you. To watch you run.

Once you’re there, you vaguely hear people around you, hear Yuki argue on the phone about something – you think you can catch it being about Jota and Joji, something about being agitated, something about Hanako – but you’re too tired to catch it. It’ll be a struggle to do this race, so if you can spare yourself the expense of energy you’d need… then you’ve got to, as sad as that is. They’re all counting on you, after all.

 No matter what, you can’t let anyone down now that the big day is here.

 Haiji calls Yuki’s phone, which he then hands down to you. Your conversation is short – he notices how noisy the relay station is (you know people are walking around, discussing what’s, tells you his concern, reminds you that you can drop out if you feel too weak to participate, and lastly, urges you to hydrate well.

When Yuki asks you what he says, you skip over most of it, merely repeating the last part as he looks at you, features twisted in worry, and the feeling in your chest keeps deepening despite it having to compete with whatever you woke up with (a cold, you’d assume, hopefully wishing it’s nothing threatening).

 You can’t find something to reply to your sister telling you to get first place on Section Five.

 You know your turn is coming, so you rise to your feet, to take off the coat on your shoulders and the scarf tied around your neck, handing them off to Yuki. The last thing you take off is your mask, before you’re assaulted with a wave of dizziness and almost collapse back to the ground. Luckily, Yuki is here to catch you back before that can happen, a grunt escaping his lips as he grabs you by the arm; all that, once again, happens in a tense silence.

Saikyo, Tokyo Sport – they’re starting to call people whose ranks are around Joji’s. You’re up soon.

 “I’d better go,” you struggle to tell him as calls are made around the both of you.

“But it’s Section 5,” Yuki tries to argue. “Actually, no matter what section—”

Kansei, Kikui! Get ready! They’re coming at the same time!

“It’s okay,” you reply back, putting on your best smile. “I’ll promise I’ll make it there.”

 Yuki doesn’t walk to the line with you, staying behind after giving up on keeping you out of the run. He himself knows you can’t drop out now – if you do, you’re forcing the entire team to forfeit. You’d be making everyone’s efforts to get to this point null, including your own, and that’s something you can’t let happen.

Even if you can barely keep your balance and inhaling the cold, dry air of early January is making your airways burn, you’re going to run Section Five and keep your promise to Yuki, to your family, to everyone around you.

 No matter what.

 -------------------

 You got the sash from a very shocked-looking Joji, but ignored much of what you thought about it so you could put it on and go on with your section. The cold winds have the benefit of being soothing against your fevered skin, bringing a welcome sense of relief, as little as it is compared to everything else you’re already fighting against.

The dizziness messing with your balance, the coughing fits seizing your chest and throat, the lethargy in your limbs, the haze in your vision – they’re not leaving anytime soon. You need all of these to run properly, but none of them will cooperate, so you’ll need to force them to. It’s tiring, it’s painful, but it’s what needs to be done.

 You watch everyone around you run past you, effortlessly dodging if they were behind you, as people cheer on and people in cars say things over the speakers attached to them. You can barely make sense of the cacophony rattling through your aching head, of everyone around, and it’s putting one more weight on your shoulders: you don’t even get to profit from the landscapes or people’s encouragements, stuck in a bubble which muffles every sound as if you were drowning.

In a sense, you have such a difficult time breathing in and out that you may as well be underwater. That’d explain the struggle of your limbs against an air resistance that just doesn’t exist.

 Before you is an insurmountable mountain that keeps getting higher and higher – Hakone’s mountains are the steepest in the world suddenly takes on a different meaning – and you wish once more you weren’t plagued by sickness. You’d have a lot of fun running up it, showing everyone back home how living in the valley made you fit for the legendary Section Five; but instead, you’re struggling to even alternate between left foot and right foot, as if walking had become a chore.

Oh, that’s right, no matter how isolating or soundproof the bubble is, everyone’s watching you, be it from the sides of the Hakone Ekiden or from back home – don’t forget about them. They’re all counting on you. No matter what, you can’t let them down, can’t let them see the team fail to see the sun rise again on their journey.

 Someone’s close enough for you to understand what they’re saying without having to focus on it – they’re giving you a drink. Haiji told you to hydrate, especially since there’s a powerful fever sticking to your skin and poisoning your nerves, so you accept it in an attempt to quench the undefeatable thirst of illness.

You burst the bubble for a minute to get that bottle of water and take a couple precious sips – a drop of relief in your sea of anguish.

 Breathing in and out requires more and more effort with each passing step, but the strength of your promise is what keeps you going. The mere idea of obligating everyone out of the run they’ve all worked so much for – not to mention Haiji, who literally made himself sick over it and painstakingly collected dorm members for four years just for this very moment – disgusts you to the point it pushes your legs forward despite the pain and the cough you have to repress more and more, with less and less effectiveness every time you do.

And that’s when the coach starts speaking to you from the car that’s been tailing you for a while (at least, that’s what you assume; truth be told, all you’re going off of is the constant sound of a motor and wheels).

 Shindo, go is a challenging game. The stronger you are, the more you value the way you lose. How you recognize your loss and resign is key. No one blames the challenger for resigning or mocks him for running away. If anything, they praise him for securing an escape route. It’s because everyone knows that man was fighting to win until the very end.  

You know why he’s saying that. He wants to soften the blow of what it’d mean if you gave up here and there, throwing the race away to preserve yourself from getting worse and worse by the minute, by reminding you not being there running against yourself would be the wisest option. Of course, you’re aware of how reckless you’re acting, but you’re putting your team’s honour and reason to be here before your wellbeing – you know that. You’re assuming that choice.

 Shindo, raise your hand if you can’t keep going. I’ll stop you immediately.

You continue running.

 The coach eventually leaves the car and starts running beside you, which makes you almost realize how slow you are if he can keep up with you with seemingly no difficulty. It’s a little hard to say considering you can barely hear anything and you’re too focused on not collapsing to actually pay attention to anything that isn’t the road in front of you, as blurry as it tends to get.

A coughing fit you’ve been keeping in for what feels like hours prevents you from breathing in, forcing you to stop and cough it all out until you’ve caught your breath. Your legs are trembling and you’re folded in half, sweat falling to the ground.

 “That’s enough,” Coach Tazaki tells you in a paternal tone you’ve never heard him speak in before. “You did well.”

In the corner of your eyes, you can see his hand get closer and closer to your back, fingers ready to tear away your number sign – but you find the strength to get back up, shaky breathing in tow, before he can do so, clutching Kansei’s sash with hands like claws.

Waiting… They’re all waiting for me…

 And, on that, you resume running, resume fighting against yourself by taking the hard way out.

 It’s painful, even more so than earlier, and everything that was sore is now almost unbearably so – yet you keep marching on, keep struggling against illness and heights alike, consciousness slowly starting to fade out. You’re running as if you were in a dream, almost, the landscape around you turning into white, unable to keep a straight line as you almost forget why you were here to begin with, why you’ve been pushing against the world for who knows how long.

It’s the end, you feel it, since the bubble doesn’t prevent you from fully hearing cheers getting louder and louder, so you continue pushing no matter how terrible you’re feeling, no matter how little you can feel aside from your body’s screams for you to stop what you’re doing and putting it through so much misery.

 They’re waiting. They’re waiting for you.

 You see the finish line from far away, but never up close.

 --------------

 When you wake up, all of your teammates present in the room (Haiji, Kakeru, Joji, Yuki – the coach is here too) try to jump to your side, before the coach orders them to leave you some breathing space. One of your first reflexes is to try and grab a mask, which someone gives you (looking up a little, you realize it’s Yuki). They all look relieved, yet a little antsy, and you’re not sure of what to tell them after sleeping for what must have been hours, considering the lights are on – as far as you remember, it was broad daylight when you went to sleep.

Still, seeing them around you reminds you how why you went to such great lengths despite everything – they’re thankful, yet worried, but most of all, you’re all still running.

[fanfiction4thesoul]

My Happiness is with You Part 1

Pairing: Roger Taylor x Reader

Word Count: ~3.5

Warnings: Language; full on troupe

Summary: It’s the holidays which means it’s time to visit your parents. And Roger gets to come too.

A/N: Hello again. This has been in my drafts for a while. Figured I would post it. To be honest, I’m not sure how happy I am with this. So let me know if you like it, or I might just let it die. Thanks to any and all that comment/like/reblog!

“Yes, mum, I’ll be there. No, I promise I won’t be late. Yes, I have the time written down. Yes. Yes.” You sigh as your mother keeps going on and on about the holidays. She called just to make sure you had everything right before tomorrow. It was probably more because she liked to stick her nose into everything. 

You hear Roger chuckle as he gets up from the couch, having listened to your half of the conversation for the last 15 minutes. He pinches your bum as he passes causing you to squeak in surprise on the phone. 

“What was that? Are you alright (Y/N)?”

Glaring at Roger does nothing but make a cheeky grin appear on his face before he disappears around the doorway. 

“Yes, mum, I’m fine. Look I’ve got to go but I’ll talk to you later.”

“Wait! One more thing. You’re bringing your boyfriend, right? Ryan was it?”

“It’s Roger mum. And yes, I told you he’d be coming along.” You frown. Your mum is normally really good with names. 

“Great! Last thing, I promise. Ellie will be coming too! Won’t it be great to see your sister? And of course Richard as well.”

Oh yes. Seeing Ellie and Richard will be simply delightful. The prodigious first born with her dashing husband to boot. 

Just as you were about to respond, Roger comes back through the kitchen with two bottles of beer in his hand. He waves one in your face before moving to sit back on the couch. 

“Yeah it’ll be fantastic mum. I’ll see you then. Bye!” You hang up the phone without waiting for a response. Groaning, you move back to the couch with Roger, taking the offered beer before settling next to him.

“Your mum giving you trouble?” Roger asks as he tucks you closer into his side. 

“Like you wouldn’t believe.” You take a large pull of beer. Setting it on the coffee table, you move to snuggle into Roger’s shoulder. “Are you sure you still want to go?”

“Not in the least. But they’re you’re family. I have to meet them right?”

You and Roger had been dating for quite a while now. You met back when Queen just formed at one of his gigs and hit it off. The expected one night stand turned into a two night stand that just sort of never ended. Well, until Freddie basically smacked you over your heads and asked what the fuck you were doing. 

Now here you were, living together though not alone. You moved in with Roger and Freddie over a year ago. While Queen was starting to do well with the sales of their first album, none of you could afford to live on your own. But that was fine with you. You adored Freddie, even if he was a shitty roommate sometimes.

“I’ve told you, you don’t have to meet them if you don’t want to.” You try to reassure Roger. Even though you’ve been together for a while now, you don’t want to scare him off with the prospect of your parents. Lord knows your mum just might.

With the holidays rolling up, your mother planned a small family get together that was supposed to be just you, your parents and your brother, Tom. He was on holiday from his first year at uni, so you’re excited to hear how he’s been making out. Out of the two of your siblings, he was easily your favorite.

Roger originally wasn’t supposed to come, but he told you a couple weeks ago he wanted to meet your parents. “No, love, I’ve got to meet them. I’m just a little nervous.” Looking up, you can see worry in his clear, blue eyes. He sets his empty bottle next to yours, avoiding your gaze.

“Where’s the confident rockstar I fell in love with? I didn’t think you’d be afraid to meet my parents.” You brush your hand across his cheek, gently turning him back to face you, wondering where this insecurity came from.

“I don’t know if you noticed, love, but I wasn’t exactly a one-woman kind of person before I met you. I never had to meet a bird’s parents. And I’m definitely not the type of guy parents want their daughters to bring home.”

Roger certainly had a point. With his long hair, smoking, drinking, and passion for the drums, he can seem like a parent’s worst nightmare. But you’ve been lucky enough to get to know Roger and see past the mask he puts on for the world. 

You’ve seen him patiently take care of Freddie while he was sick and being an even bigger diva than usual. 

You’ve watched him get excited over the release of the latest book in the series he’s been reading. 

You’ve seen all his soft smiles and the tender gestures that make up Roger.

“I think you’re exactly the type of person I want to bring home. And if my parents can’t see that in the few days that we’re there, it’s their loss.” Bringing him down, you kiss him sweetly. He responds immediately, molding your lips together.

When you pull away, he leans his forehead against yours for a moment. “Okay. We’ll see how it goes.” He gives you one more quick peck. “Now let’s get back to the movie. You’ve already got me emotionally invested in these characters so I need to know how it ends.”

Laughing, you rearrange so you’re curled up in Roger’s lap, head resting against his neck. 

Tonight's date night for the two of you. And by god does that make you sound like an old married couple. But you’ve been so busy the past few weeks with the holidays, you’ve barely been able to spend time together. 

So you both insisted on having a night to yourselves before you shove off to your parents’ place. Luckily, Fred was out of the house, so you and Roger could watch shitty movies and cuddle on the couch without Fred’s suggestive commentary. 

When you first met Roger, you thought he was very rigid. Sure he was suave with any woman he came into contact with. But he always seemed so aloof, both physically and emotionally. Of course, he had no problem with bold gestures to flirt, or anything to do with the bedroom. You just never took him for a touchy feely kind of guy. 

Boy were you wrong. Once you got together, he loved to touch you.

A hand on your hip to bring you closer or an arm around your shoulder as you sat together. Anything he could do to idly touch you, he would. His absolute favorite though was holding hands. He’d swing them between you while you walked, bring them into his lap, plant kisses all over your hand. You think it has something to do with all his excess energy.

Not that you minded. 

So it comes as no surprise to you that by the time the movie is over and you’re halfway through the next, you’re both stretched across the couch in a mess of limbs. 

You’re almost asleep on top of Roger’s chest, mostly because he’s gently running a hand up and down your back soothingly. His other arm keeps you pressed against him, as close as you can possibly get. Just before you can doze off, the door bangs open and the lights flick on. The light easily passes through your closed eyes, causing you to scrunch them up. Roger groans and you feel him throw an arm over his eyes.

“Hello, darlings! How are you this fine evening?” Freddie barges in. Squinting through your eyes, you can see him shedding his many layers of clothes he wore against his bitter cold. Fred sure knew how to ruin a moment. 

“We’d be a hell of a lot better if you knew how to make a quiet entrance Fred.” Roger moves his arm to glare at him, using his other to hug you impossibly closer. 

“And where’s the pizzaz in that?” Fred moves to the kitchen and you hear him put the kettle on. “Have you two been here the whole night? What happened to date night?”

“Well, it looks like it just ended,” Roger grumbles, though you doubt Freddie hears him. Sighing, you snuggle into Roger, willing the soft atmosphere to return. 

Fred drops something in the kitchen and yelps. 

You let out a groan filled with resignation. You know it’s time to get up and actually go to bed. You’ve got a long trip tomorrow and you both need some rest. Though Roger protests when you move, he follows you down the hall to your room. You get ready for bed in comfortable silence. Taking off your shirt and shorts, you rifle through Roger’s clothes before you find your favorite shirt of his and pull it on.

Collapsing into bed, you close your eyes again until you feel Roger’s weight beside you. He guides you to him so you can cuddle into his side. Just as you’re about to fall asleep, you hear him whisper, “I really hope you’re right about tomorrow, love.”

Trees blur by as Roger speeds down a back road, only a short distance from your parent’s house. He’s nervous. He fiddled with the radio for half an hour before you told him to knock it off. Then it switched to tapping out random rhythms on the steering wheel. You finally lit up a cigarette and passed it off to him. 

For the rest of the trip, you and Roger have managed to to go through half a pack. It definitely helped with his jitters (and yours too, if you’re being honest) so you can relax and talk. Roger finishes off the last cigarette, tossing it out the window before rolling it up, cutting off the frigid air. 

Before he can start tapping away again, you grab his hand and bring it into your lap, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “It’ll be fine, Rog,” you tell him. He gives you a small smile in return just as he pulls onto your street. You feel your own nerves jump a little. 

Once he parks, you get out and he quickly follows joining you at the front of his car. He takes a second to pull your coat tighter around you. “You muppet, were going inside! Quit fussing.”

“Oh shut up,” he says. You laugh as he bring you in for a tender kiss. “Can’t help it,” he sighs and offers you his arm. “C’mon, love. Let’s go meet your parents.” His smile is brilliant as he guides you up the drive to where your family waits. It’s the special smile he reserves only for you and it makes your heart swell even further. It gives you hope that he’s gotten over his worries. You’re so happy with Roger. Every day you’re reminded of why you love him so much. 

You just hope your parents can see that. Well, more like your mum.

Before you can even reach the front step, the front door is thrown open. “(Y/N)!” Tom yells. He races forward and tackles you in a hug, forcing you to let go of your grip on Roger.

“Tom! It’s so good to see you!” you laugh out. When he relinquishes his hold on you, he has a huge grin on his face, partially obscured by his shoulder length, dark hair. “You grew your hair out! It looks very rockstar,” you say, fiddling with the ends. 

He swats your hand away, “Yeah. Figured I could get away with it now I’m at uni. Mum still had a fit, though.” He shrugs his shoulders. His eyes flick over to Roger who has been watching your whole exchange with a fond smile. You’ve told him numerous times how close you are to your brother, so he knows how excited you really are. “And who’s this?” he drawls, “The beau mum’s been talking about?”

“You bet I’m the beau,” Rog grins, extending his hand, “Roger Taylor.”

Tom squints his eyes as he shakes hands. “I feel like I’ve heard that name somewhere before.”

Roger opens his mouth to answer, but your mum’s yelling interrupts him, “Thomas! Will you let them in the house for God’s sake!”

Tom just rolls his eyes. “C’mon, before she shits a brick.”

You grab Roger’s hand again and lead him inside with Tom. The rest of your family is spread about the kitchen. 

“(Y/N)! You finally made it,” your mother exclaims, though she makes no move to hug you. Your father gives you a smile, though, before bringing you into a bear hug. Pulling back, he gives you an eye smile. Always a man of few words, your father likes being in the background and leaving your mother to take the lead.

When he sits back down at the table, you’re brought to the attention of your sister. Ellie is sat at the table as well, Richard leaning against the wall directly behind her. “Ellie, Richard,” you say. Ellie just gives you a nod and looks away while Richard doesn’t even pay you any attention. 

“Well, (Y/N)? Are you going to introduce us to your boyfriend or not?” Your mother asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Of course,” you pull Roger a little forward with you, giving his hand a squeeze, “Everyone, this is Roger. Rog, this is my mum, dad, Ellie, her husband Richard, and you already met Tom.”

Roger puts on his most charming smile, “It’s a pleasure to meet you all. Thank you for letting us stay with you, Mr. and Mrs. (Y/L/N).”

“Oh none of that. Call me, Charlie,” your dad says.

“...You can call me, Beth,” your mother adds hesitantly. You quickly dart your eyes to your mother and wait. She looks a little uneasy, but doesn’t say anything more, making you breathe a sigh of relief.

Your father is quick to invite you and Roger to the table where supper is just about to be served. You have to squish onto one side with Tom to all fit, but that just means you and Roger get to sit closer together. Tom catches everyone up on how he’s been doing at uni, the friends he made, the classes he’s taking. Your mother scolds his hair choice and you watch her gaze shift to Roger slightly before returning back to Tom. Roger must notice though, because he squeezes your thigh under the table. 

It’s strange and a bit worrisome. Your mother has always expressed a certain type of dislike towards what she considers the “unruly” people. You thought she might mention some of those comments in passing humor before warming up to Roger. But her quiet demeanor is unusual. And unnerving. You’d have to try and talk to her alone some time.

A moment passes before your mother brings up Richard’s law firm and so dinner digresses into mind numbing lawyer talk that no one actually understands. You can tell Roger is trying to be polite. He looks attentive as he listens to Richard, but his wandering hand tells you otherwise. He keeps it tame, though, only caressing your thigh and playing with your hands. 

When Richard finally stops talking and there’s a small lull in conversation, your father speaks up for the first time, “I’d like to know more about you, Roger. If you don’t mind.”

“What would you like to know, sir? I’m an open book,” he says, leaning back in his chair and putting an arm around the back of yours.

“What are you studying?” your mum cuts in.

“Right now, I’m going for biology.”

“Right now?”

Roger shifts a little, “I used to study dentistry, but I was quick to find out I’m not cut out to be a dentist.”

Though your father asked to know more about Rog, your mum takes over the conversation. She asks him everything from where he grew up, to his previous schools, to where he works. Then she starts throwing in her snide comments. 

“Oh, you lived in Truro? I heard the city’s architecture is atrocious.”

“I bet you had some interesting people at your stall in Kensington Market.”

The more questions she asks, the more comments she makes. And a pit forms in your stomach. She’s keeping everything cool and calculated. Like she’s gathering evidence for a trial. You knew she wouldn’t like his appearance at least. Not with his long hair and stylish (if outlandish) fashion. But this is not how you scripted it in your mind. She was supposed to make some faces, maybe, that you would brush off. Then she would start to like Roger once she got to know him. 

She wasn’t supposed to do...this. 

You’re sure Roger knows what your mother is thinking, if the furrow between his brows is anything to go by. His answers, that started out extremely polite, now hold a soft edge to them. He counters her comments with an easy breeze, as if he’s not being subtely insulted. He’s waiting for something. 

You can see Tom watching this ping pong match with a little worry showing on his face. Ellie and Richard’s face give nothing away. “Wait, wait, mum,” Tom interrupts, attempting to save you and Roger. “How’d you meet (Y/N)?” 

“We met at a bar my band was performing at. Hit it off and the rest was history.” There it was; his ace. A hit back at your mother. Roger smirks, tongue in cheek looking completely satisfied as he waits for your mother’s response.

You watch with a small smile as Ellie finally frowns. Just as your mother goes to open her mouth, your dad speaks up, surprising you. “Oh, you’re a musician. That’s quite a talent. What instrument do you play?”

Roger looks just as surprised as you, but kindly replies, “I mostly play drums and backup vocals, though I can do some guitar as well.”

“What did you say your bad was called?” Tom asks.

“When I first started in uni, it was Smile. But we changed lead vocals and bass so now we’re called Queen.”

Tom slams his hands on the table causing you to jump. “I knew I heard of you before! The guys on my floor wouldn’t stop raving about Queen, wondering when they were gonna come back to play. I’ve heard your album a hundred times thanks to my roommate.”

Roger gives him a genuine smile and explains how the band sets up gigs and that they might be headed back towards his area in the near future. While they talk, your mum is silently stewing at the head of the table. She catches your eye once, and you just stare back, not sure how you’re going to deal with this.

Supper finally ends and you and Roger help Tom clear the table and do the dishes. Your dad makes a move to protest, but your mum quickly shuts him down and ushers everyone else into the sitting room. Tom and Roger joke around while you work, seemingly forgetting the tense atmosphere from before. You’re glad they get along above anyone else. When you finish the dishes, you shoo Tom in with the rest of the family, saying you’ll be along soon. 

He doesn’t get very far before he turns around. “Don’t let mum get to you, (Y/N). Or you either, Roger. Just make sure you’re happy.” He says the words lowly so no one else overhears. You sigh as he walks away. When did he become so mature?

Bundling back up in your coats, you lead Roger outback into the cold air. He quickly lights up a cigarette, leaning against the railing of your deck. He takes a deep drag before passing it off to you. You mimic his position. After a few moments, he asks, “Are they always like that?”

You hum. “Like what? Pretentious as fuck?”

He snorts a laugh, “Yeah.”

“Only my mum and sister. And Richard by default I guess. My dad just quietly goes along with everything. Tom’s the only outspoken one.”

“Besides you, right love?” He gives you a soft smile around the cigarette.

“Yeah...besides me.” Roger passes you the last of the cigarette, coming to stand behind you. As you take the final drag flinging away the butt, he wraps his arms around your middle pulling you back against his chest.

“I’m… sorry. About my mother. I don’t know why she’s being like this.” You feel so shitty about how she was behaving. Roger doesn’t deserve that.

“Hey, you’ve got no need to apologize for her, love.” He speaks in your ear, nuzzling against you. “I’ve heard it all before. From my own parents, no less.”

You sigh, “Still. I’m sorry.”

Roger hums, kissing a line up your neck. When he reaches your ear again, he pauses. “You’re happy, though… right love? With me?”

You whirl around in his arms, looking up at his startled expression. “Of course I’m happy with you! Don’t ever doubt that.”

He smiles and brings you in for a long kiss. “I don’t, love. Not with you. I love you. So long as you’re happy, I don’t give a damn what anyone else thinks.” He murmurs, still brushing his lips against yours.

You just bring him back, pressing yourself as close to him as you can possibly get, conveying as much love as you can into the kiss.

[thewritewolf]

Eating Habits Chapter 7: Surprise Visit

Marinette is starving in class, but thankfully Adrien isn’t about to let that slide.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 (Final)

Enjoy!

Read on Ao3

Marinette was feeling stretched thin, between hunger and lack of sleep and heaps of work. It was ironic, then, that she was ignoring all that by spending the class period working on an entirely different piece. Maybe it was because this time she wasn’t toiling away in solitude at her apartment but rather standing in the classroom with a half dozen other students while her professor prowled between them.

It was mid-October, which meant that it was just over halfway through the semester. Things had begun mellowing out as she hit a stride with her various activities and class work. Maybe joining all those clubs wasn’t a good idea after all, but she had promised herself she’d at least stick with it for the rest of the semester. Besides, it was all moving smoothly now... even if it came at the cost of non-vending machine food and extra sleep.

She shook her head to focus back on the long winter coat in front of her. The student’s winter show wasn’t nearly as anticipated or important as the spring show, but it was still a good idea to make a strong first impression. And besides, she wanted to make sure that every piece that had her name attached to it was quality work. ‘Start as you mean to go on’, as her maman loved to say.

Hunger pangs made her freeze midway through her measuring. One hand gripped her desk while the other covered her stomach. She closed her eyes and waited for the pain to pass. When she opened them again, she quickly glanced around to make sure no one had caught that. She’d had enough concerned looks to last her the rest of the semester.

The door opened and she risked a glance up to see what poor student was arriving this late into the period. Her eyes widened she realized it was Adrien, looking around the room with a frown as he stood in the doorway. Their eyes locked and his face immediately brightened.

He was about to call out when her professor quickly crossed the room to stand in front of him. “Is there something I can help you with, young man?”

Adrien held up a plastic bag that had a few tupperware containers inside of it. “So sorry, Madam Professor, but my delightful girlfriend hasn’t had a decent meal in two days and she is determined to worry me sick.” He narrowed his eyes at Marinette, but she could still see the twinkle of mischief in them even from this distance. “I promise I won’t disrupt your class for long.”

There were a few scattered giggles from her classmates and Marinette blushed, mortified at her boyfriend’s arrival. Irritation flared as she belated realized he’d just called her out in front of the whole class.

“Good. We’ve all been a little worried about her,” her professor said with a nod and a faint smile, making Marinette blush spread even further. Had it really been that obvious? While she returned to her desk, she added, “Just don’t get too comfortable. This is work time, not flirt time.”

He flashed her a boyish grin and said, “Don’t worry, I’m excellent at multitasking.”

Marinette crossed her arms and glared at him as he walked towards her. When he caught the way she was looking at him, he rolled his eyes.

“Lovebug, you really have no one to blame but yourself here.” He spoke quietly, mindful of the other students still working in the room.

Her hands shifted to her hips. “You barge into my classes-”

“-and feed you after you starve yourself for at least two days, yes. Unless you are about to admit that you’ve been ignoring the lunches I make for you to take to university?”

Her glare intensified and she took a deep breath to argue, but then another wave of hunger pangs struck. Her stomach growled, likely sensing the food so close as hand. A couple of the students closest to her glanced in her direction, turning her face scarlet again.

She clenched her jaw in defeat and looked up at his eyes, expecting him to be smug. Instead, he was frowning, his eyes regarding her sadly. It sent a spear of hurt through her heart. After a few more moments of silence, she sighed.

“You didn’t have to do this, you know.”

“And I think you know that I did have to,” Adrien replied without missing a beat. He set the bag on her desk and walked over to stand next to her. His eyes roamed her coat. “I see this is coming along well. How are you feeling about it?”

She gratefully accepted the change in topic and talked fashion with him for a few minutes. While Adrien had never been huge into fashion, his perspective from the modeling side of things was often indispensable. Not to mention the things he’d absorbed just by being surrounded by high fashion from a very young age.

Still, there was a lot more that she needed to do and her professor was starting to look annoyed.

“Okay, Adrien. Time for you to go,” she said, gently nudging him away.

“Are you sure?” He spoke with the teasing tone of voice that never failed to annoy her to pieces. “Maybe I should stay for a little while longer. Make sure you actually eat the food I made this time, hm?” He smirked at her as she scowled.

“Get out of here, centerfold. I’ve got work to do and you’re being a menace.”

“Oh, alright.” He put a hand on her head as he kissed her temple. “See you soon, lovebug.”

She maintained her scowl even after he left. All the way until her stomach growled again and curiosity overcame her work ethic. She set down her tools and pulled a tupperware container out of the plastic bag. Her scowl melted away the moment she took off the lid and the delicious smell of chicken stirfry hit her nose.

Maybe Adrien had a point, Marinette thought as she nearly fell over thanks to the smell of sauteed veggies and mixed spices. If this was her reaction to an actual meal, perhaps she had been overdoing it on the vending machine crackers. And if her boyfriend was determined to cook for her...well, she couldn't let it go to waste, could she?

------------

“Sorry I’m late guys,” Adrien said as he took a seat at the cafe. “I had to make a stop at the university.”

Alya and Chloe took a break from their glaring at each other to glance at him.

“Why does she need to be here, Adrien?” Alya asked. Her eyes narrowed at Chloe. “Hard to see her caring much about us common people.”

“While it is true that you all are very common...” Chloe began.

“Chlo…” Adrien said in a chastising tone.

“...I want my friends to be happy.”

“Oh, so we’re friends now?” Alya drummed her fingers against the table in an irritated tempo.

“Well, it has been years since I’ve even mocked you and your ridiculous fashion sense.”

“It’s been years since we’ve talked!”

“Hm… you’ve got a point there.” Chloe looked Alya up and down with an appraising eye. “Well, you’ve certainly gotten better with makeup, though I could still give you a few pointers. And your taste in shoes is improving.”

Alya rolled her eyes. “Still the vain, egotistic-”

“Thankfully you make up for it in your journalistic skills. Like when you brought that corruption issue to light last month.”

“You… read my articles?” Alya spoke slowly, wary surprise evident in her voice.

“Of course. I started back when…” Chloe glanced at Adrien and coughed lightly. “Well, after you saved Adrien from the angry mob, I figured you might be worth another look.” She sniffed haughtily. “I suppose I got you all wrong from the start. I’m-” Chloe made a face as if she had bite into a lemon. “I’m sorry. There?”

Alya blinked at Chloe while Adrien sat back and watched it all unfold. While he wasn’t certain that things would pan out like this, he knew that Chloe had at least wanted a chance to make things right with the gang. Marinette and Nino had big hearts and were more than willing to forgive, but Alya wasn’t nearly as trusting. A helpful trait for a reporter, less so when it came to stuff like this. But if she was willing to give it a shot…

“Ugh.” Alya pinched the bridge of her nose. “Alright, fine. We’re cool for now, but you’re on thin ice, missy.” Before Chloe could reply, Alya turned to Adrien. “Anyway - you stopping at the university. I take it that was for our main girl, sunshine?” At his hum of approval, Alya nodded. “Good, I’ll feel better knowing she had something to eat today. Girl has been scaring me.”

“Something up with miss goody-goody pigtails?” Chloe said with a sip of her latte.

“Marinette, my beloved girlfriend,” Adrien said pointedly, looking Chloe in the eye, “is working herself into the ground. We’re here to figure out how to stop her from doing that.”

“I think we’re getting through to her. She’s at least not getting worse, ya know?” Alya took a bite out of her croissant. “With how busy we all are, that might be the best we can do until winter break.”

“So… just keep holding steady and hope she starts listening?”

“Definitely. We don’t want her to feel smothered by us, that’ll just make her double down out of… well, I’d say ‘spite’, but I don’t think that girl has a gram of spite in her. Too much raw sugar and strawberry filling.”

Adrien nodded slowly. That made a certain amount of sense.

“Are you two for real?” Chloe raised her eyebrow. “That is the most ridiculous, non-plan I’ve ever heard of.”

“You don’t know Marinette like we do, girl,” Alya said, narrowing her eyes. “Let us handle our friend.”

“Listen, Adrikins,” Chloe said, leaning forward to put her elbow on the table as she gave her full attention to Adrien. “All this padding around the problem isn’t gonna solve it. You both know Marinette - is she the kind of person to stop throwing herself into her work?”

Alya exchanged a look with Adrien.

“Right,” Chloe continued. “Something bigger needs to be done if you want her to start taking care of herself again.”

“Any ideas about this ‘something bigger’, Chlo?” Adrien asked.

Chloe peered over her sunglasses with a raised eyebrow. “Like you two said, you know her so well. I’m sure you can figure something out. Just be firm with her. It’ll snap her out of this trance she’s probably worked herself into.”

With two wildly different pieces of advice to consider, Adrien turned the conversation to different topics. At least he had achieved the impossible of getting Alya and Chloe to act somewhat civilly with each other. If he could accomplish that, then helping Marinette ought to be a piece of cake.

Right?

[trying-write-fanfics]

OverhaulXReader part 7

A week went by without hearing from her. He didn’t get her number, and he didn’t give her his. They knew where they both lived, and worked, but there was no big reach from either of them. Chrono came in with more paperwork, and had a topic of his own he wanted to bring up. They did this at the childhood home. It just felt fitting.

“It’s come to my attention you left with a girl at the wedding.” he mentioned. “How did that go?”

“Nothing happened.” he was quick to say. He then thought that meant he said she was never coming back, but that’s not what he meant. “She’s an old friend.”

“I’m an old friend and I’ve never seen her.”

“She went to elementary school with me. She left after a certain incident. We’ve kept in contact,”he briefly explained.

“Where did she come back from?” Chrono asked.

“I’ve said too much.” He was quick to say.

“Alright. Should I be expecting to see her soon?” he asked.

“I don’t know.”

Chrono slyly smiled and then walked out.

To keep his mind off things, Kai worked late during the weekend. He worked alone in the office, while Chrono tended to some other things around the compound. All his ideas amount to nothing. His research led to nowhere.

“Now is not a good time.” he heard Chrono say outside his office. “How did you find this place?”

Then a banging on his office door was soon met.

“Mr. Chisaki!” he heard Y/n drunkenly sing.

“Back up!”

Y/n laughed, she was causing mischief. Kai sighed, and opened up the door. It surprised Chrono that Kai opened his own door. Chrono was holding Y/n back. She was dressed more professionally this time. Her hair was up and she wore a wrap dress. She was holding a sealed bottle of wine.

“I brought you a house warming present!” she said like she was not restrained.

“You can let her go, Chrono.”

“Are you not worried she knew where to find this place?” Chrono asked.

“No,” he replied.

“You still-”

“It's fine.” he was more stern.

Chrono released the drunk girl who did not seem to understand the severity of the situation.

“What are you doing here?” Kai asked the girl.

“Work threw me a welcome party, and gave me a free bottle to take home. I figured it's best shared with a friend, or at least give to a friend.” she explained shaking the bottle.

“Thank you.” He took the bottle to make sure she wouldn't drop it.“I’m a bit busy tonight.”

“Alright, I’ll go home, I just wanted to check on you.” She told him to turn around.

“Stay the night, you’re too drunk, again.” he said.

“You’re not worried if I have work?” she asked.

“Even if you do, you’ll be too hungover.” He told her.

“I guess I can stay. They told me to take a sick day anyway.” she told him.

“Was this planned?” he asked her.

“No, I thought you would send me home. It's not like I have clothes or anything here.”

“I’ll help you get situated soon, just wait on the couch.” he pointed to the on in his office.

She did as he said. He dove into more research that kept leading him nowhere. He would glance over at the girl. She tried keeping her eyes open but her eyelids were heavy. She kept opening them, but wasn’t strong enough to keep them open. She was watching him with a peaceful expression. She just enjoyed being in his presence. He knew he hit a wall.

“You should shower.” he said getting up.

“Calling me stinky?” she yawned

“Come on.”

She slowly got up. She followed him to his room where he found her some pajamas that would be too big for her. He guided her to the bathroom. She already knew how to use the plumbing. He waited outside for her to finish. Once she got out, her hair was in a towel and she was in his clothes.

“What should I do about my clothes?” she asked.

“I’ll have them cleaned,” he told her.

He took her back to his bed as he put her clothes in the washer machine. He found her waiting for him. She was still awake, even though she must have been tired.

“Where are you sleeping tonight?” she asked him.

He sat on the edge of the bed.

“I don’t know yet.”

“I can take the couch. I did barge in here.”

“You have feelings for me, don’t you?” he was rather bold asking.

She rolled over with her back turned to him.

“I plan on telling you on my own terms.” she told him.

“What’s holding you back?” he asked her.

“A couple things.”

“Oh?”

“One reason being I just got back here, I should straighten my ground first before I bother you with a confession.”

“What’s another reason?”

“You have a full plate right now, mister. You don’t need me distracting you.”

He didn’t like that she was right.

“I can sleep on the-”

“You can stay, Kai.” she rolled back over.

“Do you want me to?”

“What do you think, Mr. know it all?”

“I don’t know, you haven’t told me anything.” he teased her.

“Oh my god!” she laughed.

“I’ll make an exception for tonight.” He said putting his feet up. “I want to see you sober soon.”

“Are you asking me out on a date?” she asked.

“If that’s what takes to sober you up.”

“Are you going to sleep with that mask on?’ she asked.

“Yeah.”

She was always smiling at him. There was no hero as good as her, they could never come close to being as good and pure as her.

“Go to sleep, you need it.” he said.

“I’m not done looking at you.” she protested.

“I get it, you like me,” he told her.

She smiled at the acknowledgement. He didn’t understand why she had these feelings, he was curious as to why. She seemed like someone who would want someone warm. cuddly, someone who didn’t break out in hives, or someone who would enjoy her cooking. She still kept her distance for his needs, always. He did not even give her much hope.

He awoke first. The sunshine came through the blinds and rested on the sleeping girl. She stayed on her side on her of the bed. He thought he could get used to this view, every morning. It wouldn’t be awful. She wasn’t even a drooler. He got up and finished cleaning her clothes. He started more morning activities. He even changed in another room the off chance she would wake up. He was curious about her. He twirled some (color) locks around his finger, it did nothing.

Kai knew what he was, all the bad he was compared to her. He was dangerous, he knew he has a temper, his quirk can destroy anyone or anything. Yet she still had feelings for him, and probably knew about all his flaws despite his attempts keeping it secret. He left her to wake up on her own.He left her water and some aspirin on the nightstand.

She awoke around 8:40 am. She was still wearing his clothes. She met him in the kitchen where he was drinking coffee.

“Good morning.” She said,

“You too.”

“Did anything happen last night?” She asked.

“I wouldn’t do anything like that to you. You were drunk.” He assured her.

“Did I do anything last night?” It seemed she was asking a different question.

“Seems like you’re quite fond of me.” He replied.

“You already knew that.” She smiled.

“I’ll keep my ears open for this confession of yours.” He told her.

“Oh?”

“You’re right to think with your head like that.” He added. “I’ll get you a car when your clothes are ready.”

“You really washed them, huh?”

“I wouldn’t lie about cleaning.” He told her.

“Thank you.”

“Do you need any breakfast?”

“Don’t worry about me, you know I’m a professional cook.”

“Just offering.”

A name kept appearing in the paper. “The league of villains”. The attacked some kids apparently, and a lot of them got arrested. Why bother?

“I need your number.” He told her.

“Oh, and would it be used for?” She asked already writing it.

“You get one a lot of drunk messes. Besides, don't you have a confession you’re working on?”

“I haven’t decided yet if I’ll tell you anything.” She played along.

“Leaving special words left unsaid? Is that what you want to do?”

“Oh Mr. Chisaki, you have more important matters to attend to than waiting for some silly confession!” She pretended to be a debutante with a huge gasped. “Thanks for always taking care of me.” She said going back to herself.

“Should I be expecting more drunk visits from you?”

“No, I think all the house welcoming celebrations are over.” She told him. “Hey, is that the league of villains?” She pointed to the newspaper. “I didn’t know things were getting this bad.”

“They’re just tactless idiots running around causing chaos. They have no goals, no purpose, just riots.” He explained. “They just throw tantrums with their quirks.”

“This whole quirk thing seems to be a lot more tension than it’s worth.” She sighed.

His eyebrow raised.

“It just seems like the heroes use their quirks because they have their licenses, and villains are villains because they don’t. It just seems like they’re all fighting to show off their quirk and have an unnecessary tension.” She told them. “So much damage is done every damn day.”

“Spoken like someone without a quirk.”

“I have one I just don’t use it.” She told him. “And you have yours but I it goes well for your job.” She told him.

“Are the careers hero and villain not real jobs to you?”

“Listen we have the police force to lower crime. Being a hero or a villain doesn’t really focus on the economy stimulating the economy, unless you include merchandise or things the actual villain or hero doesn’t actually do.” She explained. “The existence of those titles just makes both sides worse.”

“Do you wish no one had a quirk?”

“No, that’s too much to ever wish for. Besides my quirk helped me, your quirk helps you. We use them for actual jobs.” She explained. “Quirks are just a reason for people to believe it’s fine to treat others like trash, whether they have one or one they don’t find interesting.”

“Is the underground a job?”

“Yeah, some rules and regulations are too much.” She told him.

An idea was stirring in his mind.

“What about you?”

“You’ve given me a lot to think about.”

“I have?”

“But you have other things to attend to.”

“You really wanna hear that confession.”

She kissed peace signed him goodbye and he called her a cab home. His group was losing money, but he had an idea. Both villains and heroes are diseases that have disrupted the world, constantly. A real goal was coming in mind. If he could take out the heroes the Shie Hassaikai could regain power again. The villains involvement would be the experimental phase since they are less cared for by society. Before telling Pops his plan, it would have to be feasible, research would have to be done. But he knew his purpose now, to erase the existence of quirks. He could dismember anything and bring it back together, so why not dismember every quirk?

Next https://tryingfe-imaginesblog.tumblr.com/post/613620890123517952/overhaulxreader-part-8-time-went-on-and-managing

[redgillan]

Missed Chances - part 3

Steve Rogers x Reader [// Bucky Barnes x Reader for now]

Summary: 13 Going on 30!AU - Steve Rogers is crazy about you, but he’s afraid his feelings are only one sided and being one of your best friends, he doesn’t want to ruin your friendship… On his 13th birthday, he makes a wish and wakes up in the body of his 30 year old self. The problem is, you’re no longer a part of his life.

Word Count: 2,725

Warnings: None I think?

A/N: Okay, here we go! I’ll reblog with the tags when I’m home. This chapter is mostly from Reader’s point of view. I hope you like this part :’)

Missed Chances - Masterpage

Bucky woke up to the smell of freshly brewed coffee, a smile on his lips and his eyes still closed. He listened to you move around the room while you were getting ready for work.

Your studio apartment was small and not ideally situated, but it was home. You had turned the open kitchen into an eat-in kitchen thanks to a simple breakfast bar. To save space, you had bought a Murphy bed and used the decorative fireplace as a mini library.

Bucky let out a content sigh and stretched out starfish style. He grinned lazily at you, the sheet tangled around his waist.  

You rounded the counter and crossed the living room. He greeted you with a soft ‘hey you’ and watched you take a seat on the edge of the bed, your hands wrapped around a cup of coffee.

“I hope this wasn’t the last K-cup,” he slurred, then groaned when you made an apologetic grimace. “I need coffee.”

You rolled your eyes while brushing his hair back from his forehead. He pouted for a second before he pushed himself into a sitting position and kissed you. He tried to pull you down onto the mattress with him, but you were already late for work.

“I gotta go,” you mumbled against his lips. He made a sound of protest. “Seriously, if I’m late again, Natasha’s gonna fire me.”

You had barely had enough time to place the mug of coffee down on the floor before Bucky wrapped his arms around you and flipped you both over until he was on top. You let out a giggling shriek and tried to push him off.

He kissed you again, slowly, tenderly. You really wanted to call in sick and stay in bed with him, but that was a luxury you couldn’t afford. Bucky pulled back enough to playfully rub his nose against yours.

“You know,” you spoke, “it’s amazing how you just don’t care about morning breath when you’ve been with someone for ages.”

He dropped his head and sighed, a hint of a smile curling his lips. “We were having a moment.”

“I know, sorry, I really have to go.”

You gave him a quick kiss and climbed over him to get out of bed. You put your coat and your shoes on and turned to him.

“Tell you what, you can keep the last cup of coffee. I’ll grab something on the way to the office.”

“Yesss!” he beamed, pumping his fist in the air in a victory gesture.

You grabbed your bags and keys from the counter and blew him a kiss before you left.

It took you over half an hour to reach Hearst Tower, which housed some of the world’s most famous magazine publishing companies. After receiving your master’s degree in journalism, you had applied to work as an editorial assistant for a fairly new magazine called Honeysuckle.

The competition was tough and your numbers were not good. Your editor-in-chief even used the word redesign, which, in this industry, was a death sentence.

This meant that you had to work longer hours to get the results the company needed. You didn’t mind since Bucky never came home until well after eleven.

Meeting deadlines was always challenging and you thrived on that adrenaline rush like a junkie.

You barged into the tower and passed through security before you took the elevator up to the offices.  As you exited the elevator, the usual office noises greeted you and you tried to make yourself as small as possible while you walked to your desk.

The cubicles stretched all the way down the open-plan office with no pillars or walls to isolate you. There were offices on each side of the room; one for the editor-in-chief, an art room, a fashion closet and a few others for the senior editors.

You had just draped your coat over your chair when someone sneaked up behind you and whispered in your ear.

“Romanoff’s looking for you,” your cubicle mate said, startling you in the process.

“Jesus, Scott, you’re gonna give me a heart attack!” you replied, placing a hand over your racing heart.

You leaned back in your chair and watched him take a few folders from his desk before he walked away. He turned and walked backward for a moment, meeting your eyes when he said, “FYI she looked pissed.”

“Yeah, what else is new?” you mumbled to yourself.

At this moment, the features editor, Natasha Romanoff, exited her office and looked over the sea of cubicles until she saw you. Her high heels made no sound on the carpeted floor as she approached your desk. Without slowing down, she asked you to follow her.

“Ms Romanoff, I-”

“You’re not in trouble,” she cut you off, casting you a sideways glance. “Nick wants to see you.”

You managed a weak smile and tried to look nonchalant. An impromptu meeting with the editor-in-chief wasn’t a great way to start your day.

Natasha opened the door and motioned you inside. Nick Fury was enjoying the view of the New York City skyline while lounging in his leather desk chair. He swivelled his chair in your direction and greeted you by name.

He waved you to a chair in front of his desk while Natasha stood next to his desk, looking as stoic as ever.

“Do you remember last week’s meeting,” he said, resting his forearms on his desk.

Of course you remembered that meeting. He basically spent two hours telling everyone that unless someone came up with a brilliant idea to bring up the numbers, you’d all lose your jobs.

He gave you a small smile when you replied in the affirmative.

“Here at Honeysuckle, we want our reader to feel like they matter. We want them to close the magazine with a smile on their faces, we want them to feel good about themselves.”

He took a moment before continuing, his expression thoughtful.  “I’ve read your proposition and you’re right, this magazine has lost its true identity.”

Before you worked for them, Honeysuckle was one of your favourite magazines. You didn’t particularly enjoy reading fashion magazines because they all had the same articles: a new diet each month and strange relationship advice.

But Honeysuckle was different. They were more inclusive than any other magazines, choosing models for their talent rather than their gender, age, body type, skin colour or religious preference.

Somehow, it changed over time. They continued to promote diversity, but their models became more sombre and less joyful. The colour scheme changed, too; it went from soft greens, whites and yellows to bold colours.

You knew they were selling you a fantasy, but it wasn’t important as long as they encouraged women to focus on their inner beauty. You had cancelled your subscription after the senior editors gave you your first diet story.

“Now,” Nick said with a hopeful smile, “it’s time for Honeysuckle to change. I want us to get back to the roots of our business. Will you help me?”

You sat up straight. “Of course, sir!”

“I’m glad to hear that,” he said with a nod. “I want to hear your ideas.”

Emboldened by his response, you sat on the edge of your seat. You were also relieved that he wasn’t going to fire you for being late.

“I think we should put life back into the magazine!” you exclaimed, gripping the edge of the desk. “We should talk about real women. Women who are smart and pretty and happy to be who they are.”

Nick studied you while he rested his chin on his fist. “You’re saying we should focus on the so-called ‘normal’ women, uh.”

“It’s not an insult,” you quickly replied. “Women are complex and beautiful; we all have different passions, different interests, but a lot of us have a job, we go on dates, we hang out with friends, and all that. We should talk about these women. We should talk about us.”

“I agree,” Nick replied after throwing a quick glance at Natasha. “I have a question for you. Are you a normal woman?”

You shrugged. “Yes, I think I am.”

Nick leaned forward on the desk and laced his fingers in front of him. “So if we wanted to talk about you,” he paused, “you wouldn’t have a problem with that, would you?”

You weren’t sure what he meant by that. Did he just say he wanted to write an article about you?

“I’m not sure I understand, sir.”

He stared at you with a strange expression before he reached sideways and opened a drawer of his desk. His hand fumbled for something in it, then he slammed it on the table.

It was a gossip magazine with Steve Rogers on the cover. You were standing in front of him, and even though Bucky wasn’t on the photo, you could see his arm around your waist. Paparazzi must have followed Steve when he ran into you and Bucky in front of the restaurant.

“Oh, god,” you whispered as you picked up the magazine.

“You never mentioned you were friends with Rogers,” Natasha said, her arms crossed over her chest. “He isn’t a random celebrity. He’s one of the most influential people in the world and he happens to be a fashion designer.”

“I don’t really know him,” you sighed, throwing the magazine back on the table. “We used to be friends when we were kids, but we grew apart. I ran into him the other night when I was out with my fiancé.”

“I’m not going to beat around the bush,” Nick said, straightening his posture. “Rogers is the kind of celebrity we need to bring up our numbers.”

“We also need an emotional story to attract more readers,” Natasha chimed in.

You sank into your seat, suddenly nervous. She sat cross-legged on Nick’s desk, ready to present her new idea.

“We want you to share your wedding journey with our readers.”

You looked at her with wide eyes. “I’m sorry, what?”

Unfazed, Natasha continued, “Wedding TV shows are extremely popular, it sells. This might be the boost we need. Our readers will follow you through every step of the way. Including, and that will be the climax of the series, how your former childhood friend created your own wedding dress.”

You held back a laugh. “Steve Rogers will never agree to do that.”

“He will,” Natasha replied in a tone that made it sound like she had already thought this through. “The dress’ a way for us to get noticed, to join the big league. Imagine this: superstar Steve Rogers designs a glamorous wedding dress for his long-lost friend. And this long-lost friend is you, a normal girl.”

They gave you a minute to let that sink in, but it wasn’t enough. You had no idea what to say. It was insane. Organising a wedding was complicated enough and you didn’t want to share everything with potentially millions of people.

Sensing your hesitancy, Nick tried to soften the blow. “If you accept, we’ll help you financially with your wedding. In addition, if our numbers improve, I’ll promote Natasha to associate editor. This means, you’ll be our new features editor.”

“And if I refuse?”

Nick let out a small sigh. “You’re allowed to say no, and if you do, we won’t hold it against you. But quite frankly, this is the deal of a lifetime. People would kill for that.”

He was right, but it didn’t change the fact that you had to talk to Bucky. It wasn’t just your wedding, it was his, too.

You were also iffy about working with Steve, should he accept their offer. Seeing him again after all this time brought back bittersweet memories.

The last time you had seen him before that, Steve had kissed you passionately one night and disappeared the next day.

“It’s a generous offer,” you agreed, choosing your words carefully. “I think I should talk to my fiancé first.”

“Absolutely!” Nick beamed, shooting Natasha a wide smile. “You and your guy should do some thinking over the weekend.”

You were visibly shaken when you returned to your desk after that bizarre meeting with your boss. You sat there for a moment just staring into space.

“So?” Scott rolled his chair closer to you. “Did you get fired?”

You shook your head. “They want to pay for my wedding and give me a promotion.”

Scott stared at you, his eyes blinking in shock. He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, then thought better of it and rolled back to his desk. For the first time since you’d started working with him, Scott Lang was speechless...

*

Steve called in sick for the second time that week. To his relief, Brock texted back that he’d take care of everything.

He opened every cupboard, every cabinet door searching for something other than fruits and vegetables.

After a few minutes, he found a cupboard full of sugary snacks; including boxes of Lucky Charms and Cap'n Crunch, Hersey bars and cookies, Twizzlers, Starburst Jelly Beans and a huge box of Cracker Jacks.

He carried everything into the living room and settled down on the white sofa, ready to drown his sorrows in sweets.

Steve was famous, rich, talented, loved by everyone and he lived in an incredible apartment, but there was something missing. He was a womanizer, an addict, a liar. He lived a frivolous, pointless life and he wanted to know how he ended up so messed up.

He called at home to talk to his mom, but the number had been disconnected. He figured that she’d changed her number in the last seventeen years.

He couldn’t even talk to you or Bucky because he didn’t have your numbers and because you were no longer friends. It hurt to know that he had cut all ties with his best friends –or maybe his friends cut ties with him... he honestly had no idea.

The people he loved the most were gone and Steve might have looked like an adult, but he was just a kid.

“Ma’am,” he asked the A.I. “Is SpongeBob still a thing?”

It was an odd request and it took F.R.I.D.A.Y. a few seconds to react. He only watched the sports channels, but nonetheless the A.I. turned on the television and Steve relaxed into the cushions when the familiar pirate appeared.

“Steve,” F.R.I.D.A.Y interrupted him after an hour. “Ms Carter is in the lobby.”

Steve let out a grunt. “I don’t know her. Tell her to leave, I want to be alone.”

“She’s already in the elevator.”

Annoyed, he left the blanket on the sofa and padded to the front door. He didn’t want to see anyone, he wanted to be left alone with his junk food and forget everything.

When he swung the door open, he found a woman in a dark blue suit standing there. She was tall, had dark curly hair and wide, expressive eyes.

She glanced at him, raising one perfectly arched eyebrow when she saw his dirty pyjamas, and Steve shuffled his feet as he began to feel self-conscious. She was sophisticated and he clearly wasn’t.

“Goodness, Steve, it’s past two, what are you doing in your pyjamas?” she asked, but before he could say anything she raised her hand to stop him. “You know what, I don’t want to know. I’m late, you were supposed to pick her up this morning.”

Upon seeing the confused look on his face, she began to tap her foot impatiently.

“You fought me for joint custody, now you stick to our schedule,” she continued. “I'm not at your beck and call.”

The sound of someone repeatedly hitting the elevator button caught her attention. She turned around and asked the little girl standing by the elevator to stop fiddling with the button.

Panic rose in Steve’s chest. He steadied himself against the door frame as he locked eyes with a little girl with messy dark blonde curls. Her face lit up when she saw him, a toothy grin spread across her face.

She was halfway across the corridor, tottering towards him on unsteady legs, her arms outstretched. She crashed into his legs and wrapped her small arms around him before she glanced up at him, her big hazel eyes beaming.

“Dada!”

Part 4

Forever tags:

@reginaphlanageadams @imboredsueme @coley0823 @nobody-worth-mentioning @milkywaybarnes @honey-bee-holly @ballerinafairyprincess @waywardpumpkin @jordanlahey @valhalla-ally @fabicchi @vashanatasha @berjhawn @kjs-s @breezy1415 @theblueinyour-eyes @i-ship-it-ironically @vvienersoldier  @odinhson @abovethesmokestacks @chewie-danvers @aslavicshadcw @catlingcatsthatcantcat @lostinspace33 @maefisher2003 @pineapplebooboo @thisismysecrethappyplace @racheltheclumsy@marvelellie @queenoftrash97 @wantyoubackpeter @moonstar86 @fairytalepincess8314 @freightcarcap @buckyswinterchildren @ldyhawkeye

Steve tags:

@lostinthoughtsandfeelings  @teamcap4bucky

[the-beastslayers-queen]

A Dangerous Game: Chapter 8

Chapter 8 is here! This is a bit long, but I needed it to be. Tagging: @queenofthearchitect @biforbecky2belts @writtingrose @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @jeffhardyenigmawwefan @mox-made-me-do-it @sassyspacedust @afauss2009 @calwitch @theworldofotps @sammyfireheartashryver @romans-babygirl-wwe and @romansrgn Sorry for those that are new to this tag list, I’ve decide to make my tag list universal for the sake of my sanity. I will be making a masterlist for this one tomorrow. Also, if you want to be added to my tag list, hit my ask box. Enjoy!

After spending most of our day unpacking our things and then making out on every available surface of his house, Seth and I ended up sound asleep on the couch, exhausted and left the TV on from binging a random show we found on Netflix. I woke up find Seth was still sound asleep, but thankfully he wasn’t holding me down to him. I decided to get off of him carefully, not waking him up, and walked over to the kitchen. I stopped along the way and slipped on Seth’s discarded shirt. I went over to the fridge and got out the supplies to make us scrambled eggs and bacon for breakfast before getting out some bread to make toast.

“I like you in my shirts,” Seth came up behind as I was frying up the bacon, wrapping his arms around my waist, “You look so much better in them than I do. And you’re making breakfast, you spoil me.”

“I try,” I smirked before I turned and kissed him on his cheek, “Would you mind helping me out and getting the toast started?”

“Sure,” Seth moved over and got to work popping the bread slices into the toaster, “So are you willing to go meet my mom today? I think we can swing by her house before we go pawn off that damn ring. After that, we should look into getting jobs that can pay us under the table or have you fudge us backgrounds to get something legit.”

“I can see about looking into setting up fake backgrounds for us,” I replied, “And I’m kinda excited to meet your mom. I’m sure she has embarrassing pictures of you as a baby.”

“Please don’t make my mom bring those out,” Seth groaned and rolled his eyes, “I have a rep to protect. I’m a damn badass hacker and I want to keep it that way.”

“I can see through that already, babe,” I laughed wholeheartedly, “You’re a big softy around me. I will not let you live it down once we’re done with burying McIntyre and his whole crew.”

“Only when it’s just us,” Seth warned, “Or I’ll ruin your rep of being a sarcastic, unapologetic hacker that will kill when she pleases. Because I know how much you dislike violence you poetic softy.”

“Damn it you got me,” I snickered as I plated up our food, “Now let’s eat up.”

Finn

It’s been four months since Cat ran out of town with Seth. Drew has been coming to my house every other day, checking in to see when she’d come back. I had lied to Drew and told him that she was on a long term heist job, going in very deep and not being anywhere near Orlando. So far he’s been buying it. Or so I thought. Drew’s been getting restless as of late, get very upset with me whenever I tell him I haven’t heard from Cat.

Which has been true. Ever since Cat left, she hasn’t called or texted me. Hell, she hasn’t even sent me a message on the encrypted messenger we use to stay in touch within the Club. But I wasn’t the only one worried about the radio silence from the lovebirds caused when they left town. Hunter and his wife Stephanie were worried sick over Seth. I guess he was never one to do something like this on impulse. He was always so careful and calculating. No wonder he’s known as The Architect, the man plans out everything and makes plans for every scenario and outcome.

“Bálor,” Drew shouted as he barged into Bullet Club while I was busy with the pre-opening duties, “I have had it with the games! Where is my fiancée?”

“I’ve told ya time and time again, mate,” I pinched the bridge of my nose, “I have no idea where Cat went. If I knew, I’d have to ask her if she’d want me to tell you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, Bálor,” Drew asked.

“I know that you raped my sister,” I got up in his face, “And I know that it wasn’t just you. I also know my sister was beaten pretty badly from the ordeal. I’m about to pull out of this arrangement with you. I don’t tolerate men that rape and beat women, especially when it happens to my sister.”

Drew punched me right in the jaw and I swung right back. We traded blow for blow until Corbin and Gallows separated us from each other. I had a bloodied nose and lip but Drew had a split lip and a broken nose.

“You’re going to regret this, Bálor,” he boomed in anger, “I will have your sister. I will find her.”

Drew stormed out of the club and Gallows finally let me go. I looked over at him and Anderson. Just from the looks on their faces I knew this was the spark to call for war. Cat and Seth were in danger. I had no doubt Drew would send out all his enforcers and hitmen out to try to find them.

“We should warn her babe,” Anderson spoke up at last, “She has to know he’ll come for her and take her away from Rollins. Worst case scenario, Seth will die trying to keep her from him and that will destroy her.”

“You’re right Karl,” I sighed and pressed the damp towel Becky handed to me for my nose to my face, “We have to send her a message tonight. Hopefully she’ll get it in time and try to be careful.”

“If she’s already married to Seth, McIntyre might try to kill them both,” Becky looked so concerned for Cat, and they’re so close like sisters since Cat joined the Bálor Club, “We should warn Hunter too. See if he can get in touch with Seth so we can send people out to protect them from McIntyre and his crew.”

“We can try,” I told her, “We should send AJ with Ricochet and Aleister to meet with Hunter to let him know what’s going on.”

Cat

I was coming in the door from work. Seth and I were lucky enough to get jobs that were willing to pay us under the table. Seth found work at a mechanic shop and I got work at a computer repair shop to build and repair computers. I get paid by commission so I’ve been able to make a lot of money to help us stay afloat while we hide out here.

But the weirdest thing is that I’ve now been two weeks late for my period. I mean I knew the risk of making like rabbits with Seth all over the house. I mean he can’t keep his hands off me and I’m the same with him. Since Seth was going to be at work for a couple more hours, I decided to stop at the drug store on the way home to get a couple tests.

As I waited for the timer on my phone to go off for my tests, I got to work doing some chores around the house. I knew Seth would need his laundry done so he’d have clothes tomorrow for work. So as I was lost in my thoughts, treating his shirts with dawn to get the grease stains out, my phone went off, signaling it was time to check the tests.

I set Seth’s clothes aside and I went to our bathroom to check the tests. I just about fainted at seeing the results.

Positive.

Pregnant.

+

How the fuck was I going to tell Seth he was going to be a dad? Should I risk being found to tell Finn he’s going to be an uncle? Do I risk everything and go with Seth to Bray to tell my parents?

I was curled up on the couch, the TV was on for background noise, when I heard the front door open I tilted my head to find Seth shrugging off his jacket and tossing his keys into the bowl on the table by the door. He kicked off his shoes and rubbed his face before coming over to me and kissing my forehead.

“Hey babe,” Seth hummed as he came around the couch, “How was your day? You look tired. Do you want me to make dinner tonight?”

“That would be nice,” I hummed as I curled up into his side as he got comfortable on the couch with me, “So I’ve noticed that I’m late for my period.”

“How late are we talking,” Seth asked, concern etched on his face.

“Two and a half weeks,” I replied before taking a deep breath, “I went to the drugstore on my way home from work and picked up a few tests. I wanted to be sure.”

I got up from my seat on the couch and went into the bathroom to grab the tests. I returned to the living room and stood before Seth. I took a deep breath before I spoke.

“Hold out your hand,” I told him.

“Okay,” he replied and held out his hand. I put the tests into his hand. I waited on baited breath for his reaction. His face was blank before it twisted up in confusion. But then he started to smirk.

“Seth,” I asked hesitantly, “Are you going to say anything?”

“We’re going to be parents,” he looked up at me before setting the tests down on the coffee table, “You’re pregnant? I thought we were being so careful. Babe, I’m really happy for us, but I’m scared too.”

“How do you think I feel,” I looked at him as he rose from his seat and closed the distance between us before pulling me into his chest, “I’m terrified. What if Drew finds us? What if Drew takes me away and I lose the baby trying to fight him off. Or worse, what if he takes me and makes me marry him, and then forces me to raise our son thinking it was his all along when that isn’t true?”

“Hey calm down,” Seth hushed me and kissed my hair before running his fingers through it, “I’m not going to let anything happen to you or our baby. We’re going to figure this all out okay. We’ve kept a low profile so far. We’ve not reached out to our families since we took off and we’ve used nothing but cash to pay for anything. For now, we’re going to play it out by ear. First thing first is to get you into a doctor’s office to be checked.”

“Which is the issue,” I replied, “We don’t have insurance to see a doctor and Shawn is in Orlando. I don’t know of anyone up here that could check me out without having insurance.”

“I know someone,” Seth kissed my forehead, “I’ll give him a call and set it all up.”

Seth was taking me today to my first appointment to the doctor he knew out here that could take care of me without having insurance. I was so nervous about this whole thing. I’m so young and I don’t know what it’s like to be a mother. I never got to meet my birth parents. They left me in the care of the system, choosing to abandon me instead of raising me themselves. Sure if they had kept me, I never would have had Finn as my brother. So I guess it all worked out in the end. I was also still on the fence about telling Finn I was pregnant. I’m sure Finn would ask where we were hiding to send up Gallows and Anderson to protect us, but that could draw unwanted attention and tip off McIntyre.

“I think we should tell Finn,” Seth said as we were on our drive to the doctor, “He has a right to know. We can do a video chat with him in the local library while we run a VPN to ping our location all over the country so Drew can’t have Alexa trace the connection.”

“That could work,” I replied, “But we should do it after the appointment.”

Once we got into the doc’s office, I was shaking like a leaf as Seth held my hand. I was so nervous and afraid of this whole thing. The timing of me getting pregnant was horrible. I mean Seth hasn’t married me yet. We just have the new ring he bought me the second day we were here. It was a beautiful ring compared to Drew’s. Seth picked out a beautiful India cut, deep blue sapphire in a white gold setting surrounded by small diamonds. We weren’t rushing getting married because we wanted to save up our cash to buy me a dress before we’d elope.

“Catherine,” the nurse called my fake name, “The doctor is ready to see you now.”

Seth and I got up and followed her back into an exam room. She took all my vitals before leaving the room to go get the doctor. Seth held my hand as we waited for the doc to come and check me out and perform the first ultrasound. I was so freaked out by all of this, I wasn’t able to enjoy this at all.

“Relax, Cat,” Seth cooed as he rubbed my back, “Everything is going to work out. This all happened for a reason. When we get done here, we’ll do some serious work to get married okay. And then Drew can’t touch you or take you from me, okay. We’re going to be a family and we’re going to make the bonds between the Authority and the Bálor Club.

“Catherine,” The doc poked his head into the room before walking all the way in and closed the door behind him, “Or should I say Catriona Bálor?”

“How the hell,” I was confused.

“It’s good to see you Seth,” the doc greeted Seth, “I’m Dr. Jacobs. I’m a friend of Seth’s from back before his Authority days. That’s why he brought you to my office. I’m a legit doctor willing to take care of the criminal elite on the side and off the books. I’ll take care of your pregnancy care free of charge as a favor for Seth. I owed him from the last time he was up here.”

“Thank you,” I replied, feeling much better about this whole thing.

Jacobs got to work on doing a physical on me, getting reading on my health before he got the ultrasound ready. Since I was so early, I had to have the vaginal ultrasound. I got changed and prepped for the procedure and laid back on the exam table as Jacobs got to work on firing up the machine. It was weird to have the wand put into me, but I adjusted. Jacobs turned on the speakers on the machine and I heard our baby’s heartbeat for the first time, and I started to cry.

“That is one strong heartbeat,” Jacobs commented, “This is a very good sign. I will get you prints of these early images and I’ll set you up with my recommendation for prenatal vitamins and supplements. I want to see you back in my office in a couple weeks so I can see how you’re progressing. And I will keep your presence up here secret. I’ll take it to my grave.”

“Thanks Jimmy,” Seth hugged Jacobs, “I owe you one for this. I’ll make sure to donate to your low-income clinic once I’m back in Orlando and in the free and clear.”

“It’s my pleasure,” Jacobs replied, “Take good care of her and call me if you need anything.”

[caroline18mars]

A Man On Fire - Chapter 28

The party seemed to go on forever and the alcohol was flowing abundantly, but Harper was ready to call it a day, not even the dancefloor could lure her back, and if she had to do one more round of shots with the crew she was gonna throw up. “And where do you think you're going?” Jared's sweaty arms folded around her waist, that dancefloor was on fire and so was he, he was still on his post-concert high, the lights were dancing around him, the music was still as loud as on stage and he simply didn't want to come down. “Back to the hotel, I'm tired” she turned in his arms, zipping up her handbag, “oh..ok, I'll come with you” he seemed genuinely dissapointed, “no, it's alright, I'm gonna get a cab, you stay here and keep on dancing, you're better at that than I thought, you've got some amazing moves going on there, floppy hair” she smiled her goodnight kiss against his lips. “You absolutely sure?” such a nice change from all the other women, no nagging, no arguments, no trying to convince him to come along, just a warm smile and a fiery kiss and a lot of trust, how did he deserve such a woman?. “Positive! I just need to go lie down and I'll be right as rain, I was thinking to go check out a museum tomorrow morning, so maybe it's best if I stay in my own room so I don't wake you”, what? No!. “Oh no you don't! I want you in my bed when I get back, we'll make it a morning, breakfast, museum, coffee..hot, rampant sex” he wiggled his eyebrows in a silly attempt to make her laugh. Mission accomplished “oohhhh, sold! Now go have some more fun and I'll go rub some ointment on my butt, knowing you, I'll need it” she giggled “because apart from your hair, there's nothing floppy about you” another kiss, a lick of her tongue against his and off she went, her thick, long pony tail dancing on her back to the rhythm of the music. 

Ooohhh cold, she quickly pulled up the cap of her hoodie, cabs at this time of night? Ughh, see that was one reason why she missed New York, everything was available almost 24/7, wolf whistles from a bunch of guys hanging around doing some dope on the corner of the street, ok ignore them, it's gonna be ok, why do guys want to scare the living daylights out of girls that way?. “Harper? Wait up” a familiar voice made her turn around, “Sean..” oh please no more arguments, no more bitching, “heading back to the hotel?” he came running up to her, “yeah, I was just looking for a cab, is it urgent?” she folded her arms over her chest, strange how defensive she acted around him these days, when they had been so close. “I've got a car parked around the corner, I can take you if you want” Sean took a deep breath, wait, was he as nervous and uncomfortable as she was? “Ok..yeah sure” whatever, it was better than a cab right now. “This is me” he held open the passenger's door for her “just like the old days in NY” he let her get in and then quickly circled the car to get behind the wheel and steered the car into the night. “I was kinda hoping we could talk..” even in the dark she could see the nervousness on his face, “I don't know, Sean, I don't want any more trouble with Shayla, is this a trap or something? I mean, has she put you up to this so she can blame me for everything that is obviously wrong in her life and needs a scapegoat for?” Harper sighed as she looked out the side window. “No..this is only my idea..Shayla's got nothing to do with this..I don't even think she knows I left, I told her I was going to a pub with the boys, I don't think she heard me as she was too busy winding some guy around her little finger at that party” wait, and he didn't sound dissapointed or hurt by that at all?. “Ahh, I see, lying and mistrust, the most wonderful qualities of a healthy and loving relationship” Harper sarcastically hissed, thank god she and Jared didn't have to do that.

”Can I come up?” Ugh that hopeful glint in his eye, what the hell was wrong with you, Sean? “you've been waiting to talk to me all this ride down here? You're putting me in a bit of a pickle, Sean, I mean I'm not in the mood for a drink, my back is killing me and I was kinda hoping on a bit of lay down” she was torn, but he had time and opportunity enough to talk to her. “Oh ok..” no, not the puppy eyes, no, come on, don't do this, don't look genuinely sad, arrghh, dammit!, “Ok then,fine, you can come up to my room, but 10 minutes alright?” she opened the door and ran up the hotel steps while Sean handed his keys to the valet. “You wanted to talk, so talk” Harper closed the door behind Sean on his way inside her room, they had been friends for so long and yet this time it just didn’t feel ok to let him in or even be around him, not after the ‘barge-right-into-my-bathroom-while-I’m-naked-and-you-know-it’ incident. But he had been her friend, you know? and friends..well you simply did everything to help them out, especially when they were at their lowest, like he somehow seemed to be right now, just don’t make me regret this, Sean, please?!. Sean sat down on the couch and fidgeted with the on-off button of the lamp on the dresser next to it “Alright..well..I don’t know, I guess it’s kinda difficult when you put me on the spot like that” he nervously grinned at her, oh god come on Sean, say what you have to say, she’ll understand, she always does. “Out with it, Sean, I’m tired, or was this just another one of your excuses to just bug me? as far as I can remember I’ve never put you on the spot, unlike you remember? just don’t tell me this is one of your devious plans and Shayla is gonna come knocking again and this whole good Samaritan act is gonna blow up in my face?” Harper took off her hoodie, feeling his eyes on that piece of naked stomach that was revealed, she quickly pulled down her T-shirt she wore underneath the hoodie, bad frikkin idea, Coco, bad idea!. 

“What? No! no of course not!” he turned bright red as his eyes caught hers “look Harper, I..” he swallowed hard and broke eyecontact “I don’t want us to fight anymore, I hate the way things are going between us lately, I mean, ever since you and Jared..”. What? Whooaaaa “Hold it right there, Sean, don’t make this about Jared, alright? he’s got nothing to do with all that has happened, we fell in love, alright?” she cut him right off, don’t you fucking dare to give someone completely innocent the blame for all you and Cruella have done, “I’m not, what I’m trying to say, badly, is that we’ve been fighting ever since you and Jared became an item..that’s all..and..I..I..” he stopped abruptly and closed his eyes, biting his lip ever so nervously. “I think you’ve got your timeframe wrong, sweetheart, the real issue started when you snuck up on me in the bathroom, remember? that was way before Jared and I became an item, and for the record, it was Shayla who went absolutely nuts and accused me, while we both know I did nothing to provoke anyone, so before you go accusing anyone, get your facts straight” don’t get angry Coco, don’t let him get to you, is there actually a reason why he is still here?. Sean seemed to crumble there and then, he leaned forward and covered his face with his hands, wait..was he..? no, don’t cry, come on, no..she stood there all helpless, not knowing what to do all of a sudden, she sat down next to him, she couldn’t stand tears, she wanted to give in to the urge of throwing her arms around him, but she decided not to. “Hey..what’s wrong?” ok he was crying and she had never seen him cry before so she put her hand on his back and slowly caressed it “Sean, come on, I’m not psychic, so I can’t help you if you won’t tell me what’s wrong?” don’t forget his foul play, Coco, oh fuck that, he was genuinely hurting. “You wanna know what’s wrong with me?” he suddenly put his hands down again and let his watery eyes connect with hers, “well yes, I do, I mean we’ve been friends for such a long time and it pains me to see you this way” she ruffled her hand through his hair in some silly attempt to comfort him, “ok, I’ll tell you what’s wrong! I’m in love” he broke the eyecontact once again and wrung his hands. “Duh, of course you are, you’re in love with Shayla, that’s a good thing, right?” she rolled her eyes at him, no that wasn’t a good thing, how he could fall for such a conniving brat was beyond her, but hey it was his life, and it was none of her business. “No, that’s not a good thing, it’s not good at all, it’s beyond fucked up” he sighed like he was about to lose his patience with her, “fucked up? Wait, have you? did you..don’t tell me you have fallen in love with someone else?” oh for crying out loud, Sean, get yourself into trouble much?. 

He bit his lip and nodded “yeah..I have”, oh no don’t tell me this, tell Shayla, I so do not want to get in the middle of this, but he broke her naïve bubble immediately “I’m in love..with you, Harper..”, HUH? What did you just say? No, this wasn’t happening, he did not just say what he said. “I fell in love with you the first time I came knocking on your door when you first moved into the building in NY, I tried to play it cool with you all this time, I really did, but I can’t keep the truth from you any longer, seeing you with Jared..it’s just..I” he paused when she shot up from the couch like she had been stung by a bee “This isn’t happening, this isn’t fuckin’ happening” where were those hidden cameras? Because she sure felt like this was all one big, very bad joke. “You’re probably drunk or high, I don’t know, but what I do know is that you’re gonna regret this in the morning, Sean, and I want you to leave right now, if this is another one of your sick jokes, then I don’t want to hear about it..” she kept shaking her head at him, and stepped away from the couch. “It’s not a joke, Harper, believe me, I fell in love with you, it’s not like I planned it or anything..I mean, you and I, we were thick as thieves, the reason I actually left NY and you behind was to put some distance between you and my feelings for you, unrequited love is a real bitch, Harper..and I thought I was being smart throwing myself in a relationship with the first girl that came along just to forget about you, but I was being a total dumbass because I don’t feel anything for Shayla..I never did, I just thought that if I kept telling myself that I was in love with her then it was gonna make me forget about you, but I was lying to myself and her all along..and then you showed up here and disappeared and came back..in a relationship with Jared all of a sudden..you’re nothing but a casual fuck to him, why can’t you see that? I just don’t want to see you hurt, Harper, you’ve gotta believe me” he got up too and stepped up to her “Harper, please..say something” he touched her upper arm. “Don’t touch me” she jumped back, “what do you expect me to say, Sean? I’m in love with Jared, very much so in fact, and he is in love with me..” tears of frustration were bubbling up in her eyes now as well, don’t..don’t give him the goddamn satisfaction “you keep going on and on about how I’m just a casual fuck to him, well you know what? it’s none of your business, Sean, if he’s only in this for sex then so be it, but I’m not gonna anticipate on the worst case scenario any longer, I won’t, I won’t throw away the little I have with him because you tell me so or you don’t like it, you don’t even have that right! no..no way, I’m not in love with you, Sean”

[sweetdeathwrites]

Sapphic, Savvy?

Summary: Sometimes, coming out is harder for some people than others. Kyoko is one of those people.

Warnings: sexual suggestiveness, fears about coming out

~[Kyoko/Fem!Reader]~

(original author’s note, sorry, it’s long–– 

WOW I LOVE KYOKO, MY GIRLFRIEND!!!! #LetKyokoBeMyWife2k17 i love her!! alright, in all seriousness, if there were a lot of wlw reader-inserts, or even girl/gender neutral fits, i probably would've realized I liked girls a lot sooner. And if there were more gender neutral fics I probably would've realized I'm nonbinary sooner too... haha, well, I hope this helps someone! Or is just entertaining! Either is great, haha! I want more Kyoko/reader fics... I love my gf and I'm pretty sure I've only seen one more Kyoko/reader fic here on Luna....if you write any, send them to me, alright? I love Kyoko so much, she's so good and sweet!!! also, that pun in the title? When i first thought of it I snorted out loud. Like that was a thing I actually did because I thought it was just the best pun ever. I actually snorted. also, Bianchi totally has had same gendered lovers. There is no way she hasn't— i mean, she works in the mafia and there HAS to be some situations where she's needed to be a seductress for a woman. Also my head canon for her is that she's not straight. She's definitely had a girlfriend before, before Reborn probably. She's so iconic, the butch and femme ideal, the best of both worlds.... i love her.... ok, shoutout to GuardianAngel07! not for anything in particular (ok there's always reason, but this is just a casual shout out!!1!) but she's a huge inspiration to me and she's so kind, sweet, and supportive, that I think she deserves a shoutout! She deserves more than one, but this will have to do for now! Thanks for everything~)

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The peaceful calm of dawn is broken by the rustling of bedsheets and a duvet over a too-small bed. Your mouth stretched wide in a yawn and you roll over to face your beautiful girlfriend. She smiled, cheeks rosy and her long lashes cast even longer shadows over her cherubic face. You smiled. ‘Sasagawa Kyoko,' you mused, ‘My very own goddess.’ She stirred in her sleep- just the smallest bit- but it was enough for you to freeze and wait for her to settle back down again. Through her window, you could see faint sunbeams cover the horizon and you knew you should be getting up soon, or else you both would be late to school. What a bother. “Kyoko-chan,” you whispered, breath soft and warm in the crook of her neck. A hand gently rubbing the side of her ribcage that was accessible from your awkward angle. Kyoko laid comfortably curled up against you with her hands splayed over your stomach and tangled in your hair. Your leg was tossed over her hip and your toes curled when Kyoko hummed, dreaming sweetly. You called for her again and brought a hand up to caress her face, skimming a thumb over her plump lips. “Baby…” She whined in her sleep, a long, airy noise. You bit your lip. A devious, delicious idea comes to mind and you figure you have just enough time to carry through with it before you have to get ready to go to school- or at least you have time to start it. You leaned over and kissed Kyoko’s shoulder, bare from the thin straps of her silky pink slip, and nipped on it delicately. Kyoko’s breath hitched and you grinned. Slowly, you brought your hands up to brush the hair out of her face and to stroke her with. “Honey…” She still didn’t wake up. Honestly, this girl will be the death of you. With a heavy sigh, you went back to your plan of giving her unrelenting, adoring affection until she wakes. You planted soft, ticklish kisses all up her neck and when you got to her jawline you grazed her soft skin with your teeth. Kyoko made another sound in her sleep, though this time, just a little less innocent. She’s just too good. You curled a strand of her hair behind her ear and out of your way for you to breathe hotly, “Princess…” and she giggled. “Ah,” you said, “I knew you were just pretending.” Kyoko rolled over to face you completely, one hand hiked your leg higher up her hip, up to her waist, and the other hand brushed your own flyaways out of your eyes to she could see you better. “Of course I was. I wanted you to wake me up, like Sleeping Beauty!” “But you’re already my princess, Kyo-chan!” Her laughs and the sound of her joy light up the room. A stealthy arm wrapped around her waist to pull her closer. “You know what, baby?” She smiled. “What?” “When I marry you, on our wedding night, I just can’t wait to get into bed with you. Wait—I-I mean,” You stutter, not at all meaning to make an innuendo but making the best of it, “I already have you in my bed,” Kyoko rolls her eyes, “But I can’t wait to be married to you. It’ll be so sweet. We can wake up and kiss and make breakfast together, eat it on our porch, eat it in our garden. We can be so… domestic, y’know?” Birds sang in the distance and you could feel the refreshing breeze that came through the window on your back. Kyoko’s face, bathed in honey-golden sunlight with her eyes sparkling, was just enough to show that she was just as excited as you were about your future wedding. “I’ll make sure to grow lots of vegetables. You need to keep healthy, honey, I won’t tolerate you getting sick on me!” She scolded you teasingly, punctuating her words with a playful kiss on your nose. “And I,” you retorted, “will make sure that you eat all the cakes I bake for you. I gotta keep you sweet and soft somehow, right?” A delighted laugh meets your ears in response. “Yeah,” she said, “you better do that.” You sighed in content. You never got over how beautiful she was, no matter how long you gazed at her, no matter how many times you get lost in those orange-blossom eyes of hers, no matter how many times you kissed those cherry lips of hers, no matter how many times- “Hey!” She caught your attention. “What’re you doing?” Smirking, you yanked her closer with your leg wrapped around her waist until your hips meet and she gasped. “What aren’t I doing?” Before you had time to make another move, she held you by the nape of your neck and kissed you. Unlike most of her delicate kisses, this one is hotter, needier. It surprised you. No, it’s not even that needy- she’s just trying to prove to you that she can make the first move! Your heart swells with love at her dedication to make you happy, to make things...more interesting, in your relationship. You hummed happily into the kiss. That’s when Kyoko really took charge. Her hands traveled to the front of your sleep shirt and she started unbuttoning it. Wow. This was bold and you were enjoying this new side of Kyoko very much. She slid a well-manicured hand in the opening of your shirt and pressed her palm flat on your stomach. You jumped a little and yelped into the kiss- her hands were cold! As expected, she giggled a little as well, the little minx! Not willing to give up just yet, you squeezed her rear firmly and she bit your lip gently. Your hand- warm- slides up the back of her pretty pink slip and— “Kyoko-chan! Wake up! It’s time to get extremely ready for school!” Ryohei, Kyoko’s older brother with no sense of personal space, barged in the room and you had to pretend like you weren’t just swapping spit and getting hot and heavy with his little sister. “B-Big brother!” she shouted, yanking the fluffy duvet over the two of you until the only visible parts of you were from the chin up. “We’re in our pajamas! My best friend is in her pajamas!” “So?” Ryohei tilted his head in confusion. “So you can’t see her like this! She can’t get married if you do!” Kyoko yelled and threw a stuffed animal at the door. Ryohei shouted back how extremely sorry he is and that he will not affect your chances of getting married, for sure, so not to worry about that. You buried your head in Kyoko’s chest and screamed quietly in embarrassment. After that fiasco, Kyoko made sure to lock the door the next time you come over. You leaned on the sink in her bathroom, brushing your teeth with the toothbrush that you both decided would stay at her house since you sleep over so often. Next to you stands your girlfriend, already dressed in her school uniform and brushing out her short, caramel hair. She caught your eye in the mirror and bumps you with her hip; you bump her right back. You rinsed out your mouth and gave Kyoko a minty kiss on the lips. “Sorry I kissed you with my gross morning breath,” you said and straightened out the bow around her neck, “and sorry for making out with you and, like, grinding on you when your brother came in.” Those caramel locks of hers flew as she shook her head passionately. “No! It’s not your fault that happened. And I had gross morning breath too, so we’re even.” She grinned and playfully unbuttons your pajama shirt again. You raised an eyebrow; was she really going to go through with this? Right now? Well, you wouldn’t complain anyway. It would be worth coming to school late. You were a senior already anyway, so the school wouldn’t give you too much grief about being tardy. A pile of clothes smacked against your face, waking you from your daydreams. Kyoko was already walking out of the bathroom, a teasing sway in her hips as she closed the door behind her, leaving you alone to get dressed for the day. You grinned. What a minx. “I’ll see you later, Ryohei. Thanks for letting me stay over!” You bowed slightly to Ryohei. Sure, you’ve known him for years, but you can at least be polite if he was going to nearly catch you making out with his dearly beloved little sister. “I hope you two have an extremely good day!” he shouted and waved enthusiastically. Around his waist was a frilly pink apron that read “KISS THE COOK”. The door shut with an audible click. Ever since he graduated, he’s been staying at home during the day, doing domestic house chores and exercising. At night he took college classes which allowed you and Kyoko enough time to finish homework and cuddle up in front of the television without interruptions. Also it gave you more time to kiss. “Come on, let’s get going!” Kyoko started walking quickly, leaving you behind. “We can’t be late for school! Tsu-kun is probably waiting!” “Oh, he’ll be late anyway, Kyo-chan, what’s the rush?” You pressed a quick kiss to her cheek and slapped her behind lightly, turning her laugh to a gasp. “Oh!” she whispered, scandalously glancing around to make sure no neighbors saw that. “Don’t do that! We’re in public!” Her cheeks were burning brightly. Contrary to her scolding tongue, a smile graced her lips. Just when you were about to kiss those smiling lips, the door behind you slammed open again and a certain white-haired brother tumbled out of it, shouting. “Hey! You two!” Kyoko whipped around with a look of shock painted on her face. Ryohei held up two pretty boxes. “You forgot your lunches!” Ryohei shoved a bento into your arms and reeled a bit when he saw Kyoko’s face. With scrunched brows, he placed a hand over Kyoko’s forehead. “Sis, are you feeling alright? You’re pretty warm. You’re not…” he gasped, “extremely sick, are you?” “Aah, no, I’m...I’m fine,” Kyoko assured him. You smile faintly at her. Wind buffeted your hair and Kyoko reached down to make sure her skirt didn’t lift in the breeze. Another beautiful day in Namimori. If it wasn’t for school, you probably would be taking a walk in a park with Kyoko, or maybe even a trip to the zoo. She really loved watching the otters swim around. “Hey...Kyoko?” “Hmm?” “Do you not want people to know we’re dating?” Kyoko slowed her walking until she stood still. Her soft hair covered her eyes so you couldn’t judge her expression very well but her demeanor was frozen. “No,” she said, “it’s not that… It’s…” Kyoko trailed off and let her sentence be carried off by the wind. You slowly made your way to where she stood on the road and slid an arm around her neck, dropping your bag to the ground. “Hey,” you touch your forehead to hers, startling Kyoko so her eyes drifted up to yours. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. Don’t feel pressured or anything… If you’re not ready to tell everyone just yet, I can wait. I’ll wait forever if it’s for you, Kyo-chan,” you bumped your nose with hers and she giggled quietly. “I just want everyone to know that you’re mine~” She laughed again, “Don’t be ridiculous!” and shook her head. “There’s nobody that wants to steal me away from you, silly!” The two of you decided that it was time to start walking to school again. “Of course people want to date you! You’re cute, sweet, and really smart! Don’t you know you’re, like, the prettiest girl in school?!” You gawked at Kyoko’s humbleness, but what she was saying just wasn’t true! “Haven’t you seen how Tsuna looks at you?!” “Tsu-kun?” Kyoko put a finger to her chin in thought. “Hmm… No, I think you’re just imagining things!” You squinted at Kyoko’s inability to see how blatant Tsuna’s love for her was. Kyoko took your hand in hers and when you glanced over at her her face was beet-red. You smiled and started to swing your hands together. “Thank you…” she said. “For what?” “Just thanks…” You laughed. She could be so strange sometimes! “Hey!” A thin voice called out. When you turned around, you were greeted by the sight of Tsuna, Yamamoto, and Hayato jogging towards you and Kyoko. You felt her grip loosen until she let go of your hand completely. You didn’t realize how cold your hands were until you weren’t holding hers. “Hi, guys!” Kyoko chirped, voice as chipper as ever. They all responded with a greeting of their own and it didn’t take long for bickering between the boys to begin, and it took even less time for Tsuna to begin getting chatty with Kyoko. You smiled. Poor boy didn’t know your girlfriend was a lesbian. You didn’t realize the fighting between Gokudera and Yamamoto had ended until Gokudera was very close to your side and already speaking. You didn’t catch a word of his sentence. “Sorry, what?” “I said, ‘You and Kyoko are pretty close, aren’t you?’” Green eyes slyly met your own. “I don’t have a single clue, Gokudera-kun.” Despite your denial, you couldn’t keep your mouth from splitting in a wide, toothy grin. Gokudera snorted at your terrible acting. The sounds of the rest of the group turned to background noise. “You and Kyoko are dating, aren’t you?” Gokudera had a smug grin of his own on his face. It took everything you had to not break out in laughter where you were and collapse to the ground in stitches. “What do I look like,” you began, “a person that would date super cute girls and love them with all my heart?” Gokudera seemed to choke a bit at that but when he collected himself he agreed vehemently. You sighed in relief when the lunch bell rang— finally, a break from your classes. The halls were busy with students rushing out to buy food and drinks from the vending machines on the school’s perimeter while your own little group rushed up to the roof to eat in peace. Opening the door, you were temporarily blinded by the sun and heard Gokudera swear somewhere behind you. Yamamoto laughed and was promptly told to shut his trap while Tsuna tried (fruitlessly) to disband the two’s bickering. As you sat down between Yamamoto and Tsuna, you didn’t realize Kyoko wasn’t with you until you had already began to eat the bento Ryohei had packed for the two of you. Surprisingly, his food was quite good. You’d expect it to be burnt, with how fiery Ryohei’s personality was and how easily he was distracted, but his cooking skills had vastly improved from how they were the year before. He’d get a wife easily if he kept up that work. You told the gang you’d go looking for Kyoko real quick and Tsuna nodded, asking if he should come as well. “No,” you replied, “I’ll be just fine.” You didn’t miss Gokudera’s raised eyebrow and had to bite your tongue hard to keep from snickering. “Kyo-chan?” You weaved your way in and out of climbing vines with nearly ripe fruit hanging off, begging to be stolen, and did your best to not dirty your shoes in the soft dirt underfoot. The gardening club had been granted a pretty little space behind the school to do their activities, since the sports clubs used the front of the school grounds. Almost no one except the gardening club came back here. Almost. A lot of couples, you and Kyoko included, would come to make out by the tomatoes and sunflowers; the gardens were a very romantic place for teenagers to get hot and heavy with their lovers. “Kyo-chan? Are you here?” You spotted a head of ginger hair crouched on the cool cement under the shade of an old tree that bordered the gardens. Poor Kyo-chan. “Honey?” Kyoko lifted her head at your call and her lips were pouty and red from gnawing on them. You felt your brow furrow and you came to sit next to her, bringing an arm around her neck to tuck the hair behind her ear and to draw her in closer to you. “Hey,” You whisper. Kyoko leaned into your reclined body, “what’s going on?” She sighed and buried her face in the crook of your neck. You prodded her tummy with wriggling fingers and felt her laugh. “Don’t tickle me!” “I’ll stop when you tell me what’s bothering you!” “You’re so silly!” Kyoko beamed. Then her cheeriness faded and she let her head rest on your shoulder again. “I…” she whispered, “I want to tell people about us…about me and you… But I don’t know what to say… What if they don’t like us?” “Hey.” “…” “Hey,” you grabbed her gently by the shoulder and made her face you. Holding her chin with your fingers and brushing stray strands of hair out of her eyes, you could see the watery sheen they held. “Kyo-chan… There’s nothing to be afraid of. You’re not ashamed of me… are you?” At your timid question, Kyoko reeled back like she had been electrocuted. “Of course I’m not ashamed of you!” she nearly yelled. Her eyes widened when she heard just how loud she was and she leaned in and said quietly, “I’ll never be ashamed of you… I just wish it wasn’t so hard to—” “—come out?” Kyoko laughed, voice tired, and hummed in agreement. Her hand creeped into yours and she softly squeezed your palm and played with your fingers. “Don’t worry, princess, you don’t have to do a thing if you don’t want to. It takes time, y’know? You can’t just decide to tell everyone you know something so personal in a day. It can take a long time… some people never do it. Just—” you coughed, not used to saying such emotionally-wrought things so early in the morning. Heck, at any time of day— Kyoko was always the one that was good with emotions in your relationship. “—just know that everyone loves you. If you’re worried about something changing with the guys, or with your family, don’t be. What’s this, the sixties? Everyone’s a little gay, Kyoko—” Kyoko burst out in a fit of uncontrollable laughter at your comment. “—okay, fine, not everyone, but a lot of people are! Including me and you~” you nuzzled your nose on Kyoko’s rosy cheeks and nipped her ear when she turned away from your ticklish affections. “I think you mean especially us- and not just a little bit, a lot!” Kyoko swished her finger in the air like he was making a point— and she was, a very, very valid one. She turned around and held your face firmly in her small hands as she planted lots of kisses over your face until you were in happy tears, begging her to stop and let you catch a breath! She rolled off you onto the ground, seemingly uncaring of the whiteness shirt or maybe she just forgot how dusty the concrete by the gardens were. “Baby, we should be heading back to the boys now, what do you think? You don’t want them to suspect anything, right? Actually,” you snorted in a way that Kyoko found cute (it was really wasn’t, though), “Gokudera already knows.” “What?” Kyoko gasped. “Yeah. I guess he knows from growing up with his sister. She’s so hot, I don’t doubt she had a lot of lovers, same gendered or not.” Rolling your eyes, you tried to imagine Bianchi with a woman. It was extremely easy to imagine her having a woman as a lover. You giggled, feeling like you had a secret that no one else knew. “Hey!” Kyoko whined, “Are you imagining other women? I’m right here!” Kyoko pouted. Just as you were going to apologize and explain to her what you found so funny when Kyoko surprised you yet again. “You don’t even have to imagine with me! Just do it!” And Kyoko kissed you hard on the mouth. With a little more teeth than you were used to, but Kyoko seemed to really enjoy taking charge recently. It was nice. She carded her hands through your hair and tilted your head back by your hair so she could get a better angle. You kissed her back with tenderness, content in having her in your arms. Kyoko had something else in mind, though. Crawling into your lap, her weight on you was also a bonus of her trying to pry a better kiss out of you. You lost yourself in the softness of her lips and the nip of her teeth when she changed the angle of her neck, and just the slightest hint of her smooth tongue skimming your bottom lip and— “K-Kyoko-chan?!” You pull away from Kyoko with tousled hair and swollen lips to see Tsuna standing— well, fallen, really, on the ground a few feet away from the two of you. Kyoko still perched on your lap, your mind drew a blank when you tried to think of an escape plan and an explanation, short of throwing Kyoko into the garden and pretending like nothing happened. Tsuna’s face was red as hot iron and he was probably as heated as it too as he stammered, “W-We were wondering if something happened to you two, s-since you were gone so long and Gokudera-kun said to go looking for you but… I-I can go, actually, right n-now—” “Wait!” Kyoko yelled, her face buried in your chest. You could feel an awkward bead of sweat rolling down the side of your neck… Why was she telling him to stay with her head shoved in your chest? Truly, it was a strange turn of events and Kyoko wasn’t making your situation look any more innocent… “I’m in love, Tsu-kun!” “E-Eh?” “That’s right!” Kyoko picked up your hands and held them tightly in hers, “I’m in love with a girl! I don’t care what you think either; we are absolutely perfect together and I love her very much! Our love is pure, organic, and beautiful!” Kyoko’s eyes burned with a passion you could only assume to be prevalent throughout the Sasagawa family as she announced her love for you to your dear friend. Your lip quivered and tears began to fog your vision. Happy they were, but you blinked hard to clear them. An event as important as this meant you couldn’t miss a single second of it. “Um,” Tsuna began, keeping his eyes level with Kyoko’s gaze even as his face burned, “That’s not a problem at all? I mean, I’m happy for both of you, but you didn’t have to hide it or anything… I’m just… surprised, that’s all.” Kyoko took a second to process that and during the awkward silence that followed, Tsuna shuffled his feet. Kyoko still hadn’t moved from your lap… Really, it was making this situation more trying than it needed to be… “C-Can I go now?” Tsuna sheepishly asked for permission. Kyoko nodded slowly and Tsuna practically sprinted away from the sight of his long-time crush making out with her best friend. You couldn’t blame him. The look on Kyoko’s face gave you a clear view to all the machinery working in her mind, every gear and cog rotating, still trying to understand what just happened. “Oh,” she finally said. “That was a little easier than I thought.” “You girls are such terrible actors,” Gokudera said with a cigarette hanging out the corner of his mouth, his hands upturned in a show of dramatic disappointment. “Really? I had no idea! I think you could make it to Hollywood! Haha, invite me to lots of award shows, I want to meet famous celebrities~” Yamamoto laughed and opposed Gokudera’s opinion. He smiled and went on about how he was just going to help a friend ask the both of you on a date. Good thing he didn’t, Yamamoto chimed. “Shut up, baseball freak,” grumbled Gokudera, already drained of Yamamoto’s presence in your friend group. “Whaaat? Ah, you’re so mean, Gokudera-kun!” Yamamoto teased and playfully hit Gokudera’s shoulder, resulting in another fight between the two opposites. Kyoko leaned into you as the five of you walked home, going through a nearby shopping mall to get a bite to eat first. Your arm was wrapped around her waist and pulling her in close. Both of your hips bumped with each step but it was only a mild annoyance—a trade off in exchange for being able to openly adore your girlfriend. “How do you like this?” “I love it,” Kyoko smiled and nuzzled into your neck, causing you to jump and smack her lightly with your schoolbag. A loud commotion sounded from a grocery store to your left. A young man in a white apron yelled into a crowd about the store’s outrageously cheap deals of the month and flocks of mothers held crumpled coupons in their waving fists. The air smelled like grilled meat and the small food stands outside the grocery store must have been making a fortune off of the hungry shoppers. Suddenly, a familiar turf top came into view, much more weary than he was this morning and carrying a ridiculous amount of brown paper bags, overflowing with his purchases. “Big brother!” Kyoko said in surprise. Ryohei made a similar greeting when he noticed how close you two were, and Kyoko took notice of it as well— she didn’t shy away but you could feel heat creeping up her neck. Ryohei’s eyes widened for a second before he broke out in a grin that reached his ears. “Aah, you’re finally together? I’m extremely happy for you!” Ryohei’s explosive personality returned and he beamed brightly, murmurs of agreement echoing faintly within your friend group as well. “E-eh?” Reeling back in confusion, Kyoko blinked and tilted her head, “You knew?” Of course Kyoko was shocked; she went through every precaution to make sure that her romantic relationship with her best friend was a secret! The bags in Ryohei’s arms crinkled as he shook his head at Kyoko’s naivety. “Do you think I really wouldn’t be able to tell when my precious baby sister was in love? I’m not that dull, Kyoko-chan!” he guffawed. Laughter bubbled up in your stomach, growing and growing until you were in peels of laughter, wiping happy tears from your eyes. The two of you never needed to hide anyway! While you were busy laughing until your stomach hurt, you didn’t notice that Kyoko had dropped her school bag until she spun you by the shoulders and kissed you. All of her fear melted away like ice and her overflowing joy infected you, breaking the kiss through your ecstatic giggles. Her pretty honey eyes were shining with mirthful tears and she rested her forehead on yours, smiling softly all the while she told you, “I love you.” Faintly, you heard the loud voice of a certain boxer who did a terrible job of hiding his fondness for the two of you yell, “Hey, you two should extremely get a room!”

[my-heroes-are-here]

I really love your writing! Could I request a reader who has a seemingly unrequited crush on aizawa and class 1-a gets involved to get them together? Thank you!

Ohmygod, thank you so much, I’m glad you like my writing! This idea was so fun and cute! I’m sure if what I wrote was exactly what you had in mind, but I really hope you like, I spent a while working on it. Also, in case you don’t know, Nemuri is Midnight’s real name.

When you were hired by UA High, you were ecstatic. Despite having an opportunity, (being recommend by Vlad King, your father’s close friend), you never actually went. Deciding against being a pro-hero, you started to work in a hospital, using your quirk to help people.

You have a healing quirk that mends broken bones, and torn flesh and skin, much like Recovery Girl’s quirk, but rather than speed up the healing process, you force the body parts to re-fuse together. For your quirk to work, however, you have to know exactly how the area of the body works, and you can’t use it on yourself, unfortunately. 

It was a surprise when Principal Nezu called you and asked if you’d come in for an interview. Recovery Girl needed more help with all the student injuries and, as Vlad had recommended you study here, he also recommended you work here. You had the interview and were hired on the spot. Two years later and you’re still here.

Izuku Midoriya was honestly going to be the death of you. If he didn’t learn to control his quirk, you fear he wouldn’t make it to next year, let alone become a hero.

“Honestly Midoriya, you’re going too far” you tell him as you fix his sling “You need to take it easy for a while. I suggest staying out of physical training for a couple weeks”

“What?! You can’t do that! Can they do that?” Midoriya turned to Toshinori, silently begging him to disagree.

“I think they can” Toshinori said.

Midoriya sighed and pouted. You laughed and ruffled his hair.

“Come on, kid” you say “I’ll take you back to class”

“I can do that” Toshinori stood up.

You waved him off.

“No, it’s ok, I can take him”

Toshi raised an eyebrow, but then smirked and gave you a knowing look. You gave him a small shove, not liking what he was silently implying. No matter how true it was.

“Goodbye, Toshi” you put your arm around Midoriya and led him out of the room, hearing Toshi chuckling behind you.

“What was that about?” Midoriya asked.

“Nothing” you said.

He stared up at you, but you wouldn’t look at him back. He didn’t push it, but he pondered your behaviour all the back to class.

“He’s alive” you announced, gently pushing Midoriya into his classroom.

The kids (besides Bakugo) gave a small cheer as he sat back in his seat and gave them a smile.

“Good”

You startled and turned around, seeing Shota Aizawa standing behind you, leaning against the wall. You pushed your hair out of your face and tilted you head, smiling at him.

“It sure is! But, uh, he’s not allowed to do any physical training for at least two weeks” you said.

Aizawa quirked his eyebrows, and shrugged.

“Okay” he said.

“Okay” you said, then turned to the class “Bye, guys! I’ll see you tomorrow, Midoriya”

You left the room to a chorus of goodbyes, and, as you slid the door closed, you caught and held Aizawa’s eyes.

“That was weird, right?” Kaminari said to the others after class “That whole interaction between (Y/n) and Aizawa. They were acting weird”

“Now that you mention it, they were acting odd earlier as well” Midoriya said “They said they'd bring me back to class, and then insisted after All Might offered. Then they had this weird silent conversation, and when I asked about it, they brushed it off. I wonder what’s going on”

“Maybe they’re unwell?” Iida suggested.

“Maybe Aizawa and them got into an argument?” Kaminari offered.

“That makes no sense, why would they be so eager to take Midoriya back if they had argued with our teacher?” Kirishima said.

“You’re all idiots” Jiro said.

All the guys looked at her as she stood in a group with the other girls. They all looked they knew something the boys didn’t, and were happy about it.

“What do you mean?” Midoriya asked.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Mina said, and sighed after the boys shook their heads “They have a crush on Aizawa!”

The guys stared at her with their mouths open for a solid minute, and then started laughing. The girls folded their arms and glared.

“Crush?” Kirishima giggled “They don’t have crush on him! Why would they?”

“Haven’t you seen the signs?” Momo said “They tucked their hair behind their face, they tilted their head, they maintained eye contact for a long time, and they’ve done this many times, as well as so many other things that indicate that someone likes someone”

“That doesn’t mean you have a crush on someone” Kaminari said “Midoriya and Todoroki do that to each other all the time”

“It absolutely means they like him" 

“I feel so sorry for them” Uraraka said “They’re clearly smitten and Aizawa is just so…unresponsive”

“Well, yeah, it’s Aizawa. I don’t know what they’d expected from him” Mina said.

“Maybe we could help!” Momo exclaimed.

“What?” everyone looked at her.

“We could help them get together by having (Y/n) always bring us back after being with them so he sees them a lot! Or, we could ask that they come out to training with us so they can heal us right away! Or ask that they comes in to teach us about health issues! Anything to keep them in the same space for a long period of time, so he sees how amazing they are and asks them out!”

The rest of the class blinked at her.

“I don’t think that is a good idea” Tokoyami came up next to her “Meddling seems like it would cause a lot of problems, especially for (Y/n). They might get hurt”

“Or they might get together with the love of their life, and they could get married and have kids and live happily ever after” Hagakure twirled in place “Let’s do it!”

“Is everyone else in?” Momo asked.

Kaminari, Kirishima, Midoriya, Mina, Jiro, and Asui nodded. After some hesitation, Iida nodded, and Todoroki slid up next to Midoriya and gave a nod as well. From the other side of the classroom, Bakugo slammed his fists on his desk. Everyone jumped.

“I want in!” he yelled.

“Are you sure?” Kirishima asked “Are you sick or something? Why do you wanna help?”

“Because maybe if Aizawa gets laid he’ll stop lying and tricking us every chance he gets!” Bakugo shouted.

A series of groans and “gross"s sounded out around the room. Kirishima pretended to puke.

“Seriously, Bakugo?” Jiro asked "Why would you say that?“

"Because it’s true” he shrugged.

“Ok, well, ignoring that” Momo said “We all want to help, and we’re all going to! Ok, so, here’s the plan……”

The students of class 1-A were acting weird. Midoriya came in to get his sling removed, which was normal, but he begged you to bring him back to class, which wasn’t normal. After getting his casts off he usually went back by himself. 

Then the other students would come in for the smallest injuries. Uraraka came in saying she sprained her ankle, but she’s only twisted it, then she asked you to bring her back to class. Kirishima came in with a tiny bruise, asking you to heal it. He also asked you to ‘escort’ him to class. Iida came in worried about his boosters (there was a rock in one), Momo asked if she had broken her finger (she had just bent it the wrong way), and finally, Bakugo barged in demanding you fix a paper cut he got. All of them making you walk them to class as well.

It was so strange, and you were very confused. They even asked if you could come to training with them, saying it would save the trouble of having to go in and out of the office every time someone got hurt. You couldn’t, obviously, you weren’t allowed to leave the office unattended unless you had notified Recovery Girl and Principal Nezu. Shota was dragged in with them every time one came in, although he never stayed. 

They even called you into the classroom when he fell asleep asking you to check “if he was ok”. Clearly they were up to something, but you weren’t sure what. 

Sighing, you pushed your lunch around with your chopsticks. You loved those kids, but whatever they were doing was interfering with your work and they needed to stop.

“Something up?” Nemuri asked, sitting down next to after taking her soup out of the staff room microwave.

“Eh, it’s nothing” you waved her off, but swayed when you saw the look she gave you “It’s just class 1-A is acting really odd lately, and I have no clue why. Normally I don’t see them that much, but now they’re coming in for paper cuts and bruises, and I’ve no idea why”

“Huh, that is weird” Nemuri said “Hey, Shota, any clue as to why your class is acting weird?" 

Shota looked up from his face plant on the desk and stared at you and Nemuri for a few seconds before speaking.

"Yeah, they’re trying to get me to fall in love with (Y/n) because they think they have a crush on me. I heard them talking about it a few days ago”

There was a pause before Nemuri, and Yamada and Toshi who had been listening in, started howling with laughter. You turned red and covered your face.

“That’s hilarious!” Toshi said.

You gave him a playful glare and then gently swiped at Shota’s shoulder with your hands.

“Shota! Why didn’t you tell me! Or stop them!” you scolded.

“I thought it’d be funny” he smirked at you “I didn’t think it would interfere with your work, I’m sorry”

“Yeah, well” you poked his leg “What am I supposed to do now, huh? Go into your class and say ‘sorry kids, I heard you were trying to set me up with your teacher, thanks for the help but we’ve actually been dating for two years’?”

“Oh, yes, please do that” Nemuri chuckled.

“And can I watch?” Yamada asked.

Shota gave you a smile.

“No, Midoriya’s going to you to check on his arm after lunch, right?” he asked, and you nodded “Bring him back after, I have a better idea”

“You’re arm is fully healed!” you smiled at Midoriya “And before you ask, no that doesn’t mean you can go back to training”

Midoriya sighed and pouted, but then turned back you and opened his mouth. However, you spoke before he could.

“Yes, I’ll bring you back to class, let’s go”

He jumped down off the bed and got into step beside you, the both of you heading down to class 1-A. You hadn’t ever expected you’d have to announce to Shota’s class you were dating him. You just assumed that eventually you’d get engaged and everyone would ask and you tell them. But here you were, on your way to expose your relationship to a bunch of 15 year olds so they’d stop trying to set you up with your boyfriend.

Not a sentence you’d ever thought would come into play in your life.

Sliding the door open, you let Midoriya in, and stared at the faces of the other kids. They looked nervous and hopeful. It was cute.

Shota appeared in your line of vision, and you smiled.

“He’s healed, but I still don’t want him training for another week”

“That’s fine” Shota said, and you turned to leave before he called out to you “Hey, did you to look up houses today?”

“I did, but I couldn’t find a nice one within the budget in the area” you said.

“We’ll look further out then” he said, and you nodded, smiling when you saw the class’s confused looks.

“Uh, what are you talking about?” Mina asked.

“Oh, well, we’re moving in together” you told her “It’s coming up on our two year anniversary, and we thought it was time" 

"What?!” the class yelled.

“You’re already dating!” Bakugo shouted. 

“Yeah, didn’t you guys know that? I mean, I’m not really that subtle” you said.

“I-but-we” Momo stuttered over her words.

“Anyway, I should go now, let you guys get back to class” you walked over to the door “See you later!”

The only response you got was Shota muttering out a goodbye, and when you slid the door shut, you heard the class explode in a bunch of questions. Giggling, you headed back to your office.

[icharchivist]

Thinking of siblings t/rauma (and considering i no longer have th/erapies to talk about it so gotta find a way to put it into words since it seriously makes me spiral down everytime someone talk about “real siblings dynamic”) I see them enough to try to see why it makes me that uncomfortable.

For the longest time i thought about it being the abandon issues; And i think it’s partially true.

My eldest sister ran away from home when I was 7, I barely have any memories of her, which is extremely frustrating because i know she was the person i was the closest to back then. My mom was always neglectful, my father was never here and always so.... him, hateable, and my other sister was jealous of me and always shut me down. (we have family videos that show it a lot, like my parents trying to capture me in video when i was a kid and my sister barging in and trying to take all the focus, this sort of things). My sister also told me later that one thing that killed her was that i was this close to our eldest, in a way she wasn’t, and she took it against me.

I have no memory of the person i was the closest to before I turned 7. She left around my 7th birthday and in between two times my mom was in the hospital bc of a cancer.

And it left... such a sour ambiance at home. My mother was already neglectful but from that point on, rightfully so though, she ended up in a major depression. My dad was an asshole and was mocking it all the time, probably not helping that he’s probably the reason she left to start with. And my sister felt so betrayed she pushed away everyone. It alligned with when i started to get bullied at school. And worse of all, I was 7, so no one took the time to tell me what’s going on. I originally thought she left for my grandmother’s house for months, when they told me my sister did a judicial procedure to be officially under my grandma’s care with a restrincting order on my parents I’ve heard it ways later bc my mom was crying that my sister was trying to put them in prison, without giving me any context. And then without warning, the trials ended, and my sister left the country with my grandmother never to be seen again- and it took them months to tell me that.

It’s the usual isn’t it with this family. They do horrible things that have horrible consequences but they never say anything about it and you have to deal with it. Shame i had to do it when I was 7.

Unhelpful either too is that i inherited my sister’s room when she left. I was surrounded by all of hers without even seeing her again. And I barely even remember why we were closer. I just know the few memories I have of her were loving and close, and I know my sister told me about it more, that I was copying my eldest all the time and it made her so happy and i have no memory of that.

The next year I think, my other sister got deadly sick and had to be hospitalized. My mom freaked out, not wanting to lose another daughter this soon, and stayed by her side all the time. During the 3 months she was at the hospital i was left alone with my dad who was, and still is, an asshole, who would drop me off at a mom’s friend’s house bc it was a bother taking care of me, and again i was having problems at school and I was barely told what was going on.

My sister told me that she believes she got sick because in a way, she felt my mom’s neglect this way. She feels like her body responded to all that tr/auma. The result though is that my sister ended up with a fragile health and my mom kept overprotecting her, being here all the time for her. But never for me. Who cares anyway.

The thing is that, we both lived my eldest sister’s departure badly, both my sister and I. And we were fighting all the time. Like “real siblings do” according to online popularity. We were seriously always fighting and bickering and it was vile. My sister was never nice to me, always shutting me out, always venomous, hating when i was trying to be around her, hating if i was even around when her friends were over. But there was nothing fun in all of that. Even playing together was always vile, with my sister constantly making me regret it. There is nothing from that time period I look foundly at. Because I had a loving sister before I guess, because we both had. And we were both lost, both abandonned, both with different memories to hold on to, and my sister coped by clinging to her friends and rejecting me, and i did while people were rejecting me everywhere by trying to cling to my sister and being constantly pushed away.

And I was all the more frustrated that my mom was covering her with attention but barely looked in my direction at all time. A thing i’ve felt back then and had to talk to to my family as i grew up and they all ended up agreeing that it totally happened. I used to hear “you just believe that because you’re the youngest and isn’t used to not having the attention on you” but nowadays if you ask either my sister or my mom they know it’s true.

A couple of years after my eldest sister left, my other sister managed to contact her again. They talked for a few weeks, and my sister didn’t tell me before a few weeks, where she told me we should never tell mom because our eldest still resented her. When I asked if i could talk to her, my sister told me not yet, that she was trying to arrange it but that for now our Eldest needed time to think about messaging me back.

All was ruined bc my mom discovered it and took my sister’s mail account to beg my eldest to come back. We have never known what exactly went on in that, except that my eldest blocked my sister and sent a letter back home, saying she never wanted to have anything to do with any of us ever again. We have never heard of her personally after that. A missed chance.

When I was around 13, my parents divorced.It was vile, it still is, it was a disaster, my father ruined my mom’s life to a poitn she had no future staying there anymore. And because she recontacted a childhood sweetheart she fell in love with again back then, she decided to move away on the Reunion Island.

My sister and I had a choice. To stay with my father, or to leave with my mom.

I was bullied badly at school and was never close to my father. I took the chance as a fresh new start. My sister though had a good life, good friends, she was one year away from finishing high school, she had a boyfriend, a stable life. She refused to leave and stayed with my father.

The last few months before we left were the weirdest. It’s when my sister started to open up to me a little more. We were doing more sibling things like watching TV shows until late in her room, discussing together, sneaking up food. I think it was when we realized that we weren’t going to see each other again for a while. It was a weird time.

When we finally left with my mom, my sister ceased all contact with us. Mainly, because she felt abandonned; Because she wished we wouldn’t have left. Because she had been abandonned before and we wer eputting her through that again. So on my side, i also felt abandonned. Even if our relationship was weird with my sister, we were there. It was different than to have your sister ignoring your mails. Not after havign dealt with the total absence of the eldest one.

It lasted about a year. In that year, I came to visit for the summer holidays and my sister came to visit for the winter holidays. In between them, we barely talked. Aside from those two times, we never talked.

My uncle is a musician- in summer, we celebrated my sister’s birthday, and my uncle insisted that i sing a song for my sister when I was there. I picked a song half in french half in english, a duet. The english part resents the french part for having left, for not trying to make the relationship work, while the french parts talks about “if it’s too late to come back, i would come back in time and of all that i’m made of, i would give it back to you, even if we have to learn it all again/I wish i would have given you all about myself, instead of leaving, make everything anew between us again, instead of lying talking about our differences- loving you in another way than backward.” I still cry when i hear this song. So does my sister. She came running into my arms crying that day telling me how unfair it was to make your sister cry on her birthday.

Things got worse for my sister when we were away. my father kicked her out of the house as soon as she turned 18. She had a hard time adjusting to her new life, and she took mom being away even harder.

On my side, i was still bullied at school, had to deal with the step family, ahd to deal with my father being an asshole, and had my mom collapse on me completely because she “lost two daughters” as my sister didn’t talk to her anymore. I had to deal with my mom’s depression all that time. and mine that started to settle in. It was a bad time.

For a time, my mom managed to contact back her mother. It was a weird time. They echanged mails a few time. My grandmother as diagnosticked with a cancert so she wanted to contact back the daughter she had lost in all of that. But, as i mentioned before- my eldest sister left to live with my grandmother. My mom cherished this newfound bound with her mom to try to discover what became of my eldest sister. My grandma always shut her down though.

My mom got another divorce (which she subtlely blamed on me for mentioning i wanted to come back in France for my highschool) and..... She asked my grandmother if they could go live where they lived, on another island. It would have made us in contact with the Eldest again. My mom wanted my sister to come and join us. My grandma first accepted but refused to let us talk to my eldest sister for a while. We organized moving away to that island to live back with them, and it was.... so stressful. My sister hadn’t been answering to us since the plan had happened, i still didn’t know what i want, and i was terrified about meeting my eldest sister i have almost forgotten everything about then.

A couple of weeks before we officially had to put our stuff on the boat to that island, my grandmother called to tell us not to come close; That my eldest sister didn’t want to see us ever again, that she was furious it was even made without her accord, and that we weren’t welcomed. At the last minute, we had to reschedule the whole moving away thing to France back again. With my mom more destroyed than ever for having that hope this close and it being crushed.

I don’t even remember how i felt back then. I started developping a deadly skin disease because of stress, and this sickness still follows me to that day. So i guess I really didn’t take it well. I reached my breaking point.  (it took months for my parents to actually start worrying about the fact my skin was falling apart and i was screaming in pain lmao. It took months. When I finally got to see a doctor about it i got yelled at because I was close from being worth being hospitalized because of how bad it became.)

Came back in France, troubles with my father got worse, as history knows, and my mom was crushed. My sister on the other end... well we moved back to the city she lived. But my mom was clinging to her, was quite and still is suffocating to her. And my sister never liked it. So she put on barriers, took her distances, which made my mom be worse in worse.

For what it’s worth, even if we didn’t see each other a lot, we saw each other fairly often. And my relationship with my sister had definitly changed since.

Since I came back, we are closer than we ever were. My sister isn’t someone i really have a lot in common with- not at all, and when it comes to advice, my sister tends to give some of the worst advice, or neglect how i feel, and put me into mess of situations. She doesn’t consider how i feel all that much or insist that i’m blowing things out of proportion. Yet despite this, when we are together, we smile, we laugh, we joke, we tease, we hug, we watch stuff, we have fun.

It’s far from perfect. Sometimes we have fights. sometimes they’re petty and still loving, in a way our fights weren’t before. Sometimes they are full blown fights. One of those i remember pushed me to a full blown panic attack.

But there are a lot of differences. of my sister sometimes wanting me around more, of her wanting me to meet her friends, to know her universe, things she never did before. And we get along well for two people as different as we are.

And we talked a lot about our common tr/auma. Of how we both dealt about our eldest sister, about our parents.

But with all of this, the fights we have with my sister are never things i look endearingly at thinking “yup that’s what siblings are like”. This is things that pushes me to cry and collapse because “why are we doing this again haven’t we been through enough”.

Everytime i read about “what normal siblings do”, “how normal siblings behave”, “how eldest sister are oppressed”/”if you’re a youngest child you don’t know anything about the suffering of the eldest”, this sort of posts, I spiral down exactly in all of that i just mentioned. All of that starts to haunt my mind again until i collapse crying and desperate.

My family ruined my life in every single aspect.I cannot blame my eldest sister for having ran away from it. I’m glad she did. But the abandon that came out of it destroyed me, and destroyed any relationship in this family. And even if i look more lovingly to the relationship i have with my other sister, as we are closer than before, she is still... terrible at times. In a way that I don’t think most people can relate to. Because of our family, because of our history.

And all of this mess? Even if i’m sure there’s more to it, and well, this post focuses on siblings but anyone who knows me know my relationship with my mom and father (and step families) extend all sort of stresses and things worth being depressed about. Adding the bullying and my abusive r/elationship on top of that and the fact i didn’t have proper friends before high school, and you have someone who can barely rely on people.

It ruined my mental health. I’m just symptoms over symptoms at this point. My only good personality trait is my overobsession on stuff but that’s because it’s the only way i manage to forget that this is the mess i come from. I can only define myself to  what my depression and family left me. To all that tr/auma; And it’s haunting. It stops me from sleeping every night. It pushes me to the most horrible thoughts.

All while knowing I cannot change anything about it. Thinking of a future is bleak. This is all too much of a burden to think about.Even if now i’m lucky to have friends who care and love me. I don’t even know what can be the path for recovery from that point on. All I know is that the first step will be to get away from this family in one way or another, but i’m far from being able to take this step. And i’m left with my memories.

I mentioned f.rozen and how i hate how ppl bash the sibling dynamic in it in my other post and i think i can continue my point here: i don’t relate to the relationship of Elsa and Anna, but I wish i could. This is the ultimate fantasy for me. In a way my depression defines me too much, my panic attacks, all of that. But i know what it’s like to be shut away, to be abandonned for a long part of our life, to have lost controle of it, most likely because of bad advices from your parents. In a way, F.rozen talks to me because it’s the ultimate fantasy of a broken disfunctional family where the siblings eventually make it out okay and tries to mend what was broken, to try to understand why it happened, to reach out when the other is freaking out. That’s something i can never have and never will, and will never work with the types of siblings that i have. But the simple fantasy of it being something people can achieve in a fantasy world in which you can escape for 1h40? I’m so glad it exist. I love l.ilo and stiches,and i love the sibling relationship in it, but it’s not comparable. It’s more realistic, more grounded in reality. And it’s exactly what i’m running away from. The sibling conflict is nothing alike the F.rozen’s one. I hate when people pit those two movies against each other as “one being the supperior sisters movie” like apparently there’s only one way to portray siblings into movies and straying away from it is a mistake.

I’m just babbling now i have a headache from having cried the whole time i typed that.

it’s been a while i posted a T/rauma time on my tumblr.

But this is what i mean everytime i say i get mad at “sibling cultures” posts. This is what gets through my mind the whole time.

I just wish it wasn’t.

*sighs* i’ll go back to watch my movie now if you excuse me.