#I feel like I’m back in middle school all over again lmao
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lun9tic · 3 days ago
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- NEEDY
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| pairing: ian x bestfriend!reader
| warnings: smutt, smoking weed
| summary : after smoking a blunt together your real feelings for each other come out
| A/N : my writing gets so awkward during writing smut im sorry, i tried to make this one more soft then my last one LMAO, and give me requestss!! i want to write for hamzah and maybe some harry potter characters. anyways enjoy and comment pls. ALSO WHY IS THE IAN TAG SO DRY??? COME ON GUYS
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After a nice dinner with Ian and a group of friends, the two of you step into the elevator, full of food and ready to sleep. “God damn, that was amazing,” Ian says, rubbing his stomach as you press the button for the 10th floor.
“I know, I feel like I’m pregnant now. Look,” you joke, turning to the side in front of the elevator mirror and puffing out your stomach before sucking it back in. Ian bursts out laughing at you.
The elevator dings, and the doors slide open. Still laughing, the two of you step out and make your way to the hotel room you’re sharing.
You and Ian have been friends since middle school, watching him grow as an artist like he's always wanted.
You and Ian have been inseparable since middle school, bonding over your love for music, and several late night conversations. You always saw the way his eyes lit up whenever he talked about becoming a big artist, it wasn’t just a dream to him, it was something he was sure to achieve.
Since then, you’ve watched him grow and spend countless hours perfecting his talent with music, starting with DJing. His progress has been nothing but inspiring to you, no matter what he just never gave up. You’ve been there through all the moments of doubt, the nights he stayed up late working on a beat, and the excitement when his hard work paid off. It’s been so nice to witness him chase his dreams.
Watching Ian grow so fast in the underground rapper industry was your favorite part. It was like one night he completely blew up and all his hard work finally paid off. since then you have been to every show, every interview, and every studio session, he wouldn’t want to have anyone else there but you.
“I'm gonna change out of this dress,” you say quietly as you both walk into the cold room. “alright.” ian says before getting into bed. you kneel at your luggage and pick out your pajamas for the night before going to the bathroom to change and freshen up.
After freshening up you leave the bathroom to see Ian outside, on the balcony rolling a blunt. you step outside and close the balcony door before sitting on the plastic chair beside him. The air was warm with an ocean breeze, the smell of the fresh air hitting your nose. The sky was clear, and a nice view of the moon and a couple stars.
You glance over at Ian, as he finishes rolling a blunt. With a small sigh, you unlock your phone and start scrolling, posting a few pictures from earlier in the day.
You're interrupted from scrolling when Ian reaches over, pulling your phone from your hand. “Get off your phone,” he says, setting it on the small glass table in front of you. He leans back on the bench, taking a slow puff from the blunt. “Talk to me. feel like we haven’t talked as much as we usually do.”
He passes the blunt to you, his blue eyes meeting yours. You take a hit from the blunt, exhaling before saying “We have talked. But okay, how are you?” you ask, smiling as you lean your head against the glass door behind you and resting your legs on top of his thighs.
He chuckles softly, his left hand resting on your legs, rubbing them softly with his thumb. “I’m good. How are you?” “I’m good, you know,” you shrug, a smile still on your lips.
Ian laughs again, and takes another hit. ian continues the conversation as the two of you continue passing the blunt back and forth, talking about the past for the next twenty minutes.
ians blue eyes, slightly bloodshot and glassy from the weed, stare at the side of your face as you talk. you pretend to not notice it but his stare is so intense its impossible to ignore.
Finally, you turn to him, your own eyes soft and red-tinted. “What?” you ask, a playful smile curving your lips.
His lips twitch into a matching smile as he shakes his head. “Nothing.” “You won't stop staring at me," you laugh softly, trying to hide from his stare by resting your head on his shoulder.
"You're so pretty," he murmurs, his voice quiet . The words catch you off guard, making you sit up to meet his eyes. "Yeah?" you ask, a small smile on your lips. "Yeah," he nods.
Silence falls between you, the air thick with emotions. You can't tell if he's just saying it to say it or if he really means it.
Before you can think too much, he leans in, closing the space between you and pressing his lips to yours. You let out a soft whimper of surprise against his lips, but quickly give into the kiss, your right hand resting on his thigh as you lean closer.
"I've wanted this for so long," he says against your lips as the kiss breaks, his hands on your waist. A shy smile blooms on your face as you whisper, "Me too." Before you kiss him again.
His hands find your hips, gripping them firmly as he pulls you onto his lap to straddle him. The closeness leaves you breathless, and lost in him.
you both continue to make out, the pent up love for each other finally coming out. “Let's go inside” he says as his hands grip your ass. you nod and get off his lap, Ian takes your hand and leads you inside the room.
The balcony door shuts close as you both stumble your way to the bed, lips connected and hands all over each other. the back of your knees hit the end of the bed, making you both fall down on the bed.
Your hands run over Ian's broad shoulders, you reach for the end of his shirt, pulling it to signal him to take it off. His lips leave yours briefly, and he quickly pulls off his shirt before his lips are back on yours once again, the kiss more desperate than before.
“ian” you whimper as his lips leave yours to trail kisses down your chest. “I got you baby.” he murmurs before his fingers tug down your sweat pants. your hips lift, helping him take off your sweats.
he throws your sweats to the side and quickly takes your panties off. His eyes stare at your wet cunt, grabbing your legs and spreading you open. He glances up at you with parted lips before he attaches his lips with your wet cunt making you gasp and shut your eyes.
Ian moans at the taste of you, the vibration from his moan making you whimper. his eyes close as his lips suck your clit, and brings his hand up, sliding a finger into you. “i-ian” you moan at the feeling, you hand wrapped in his brown hair, leading him to where you need him.
Ian groans at the taste of you. the sounds from his mouth, the feeling of his warm wet tongue sucking your cunt and large fingers moving quickly in and out of you. moans leave your lips as Ian curls his fingers inside you.
“Ian” you moan, clenching around his fingers, feeling your high coming but it's interrupted by Ian pulling his fingers out and sitting up in between your legs. “the fuck?-“
he shuts you up by leaning down and connecting his lips with yours. “taste so fucking good” he mumbles. “Take off your pants” you slur with a smile.
Ian chuckles and takes his pants off before crawling over you again. his lips connect to yours once again as he feels up on you. “tell me i can” he says against your neck, breathless. lost in the feeling of him around you you don’t hear what he says. “what?”
“tell me i can fuck you baby,” he kisses you “please”. you bite your lip at his needy tone and nod “yes”. he smiles at your words and lifts your legs to rest them on his shoulders. the look in his eyes make you clench around nothing, you’ve never heard or seen him so desperate for something, it was so hot.
Ian lines himself at your entrance and rubs his dick up and down your wet folds. “you’re so gorgeous” he watches you as he slowly slides his dick in, wanting to see your reaction.
your lips part at the stretch from his dick and hold back a moan. “oh..” you moan, turning your head to your side to avoid his hard stare. Ian quickly reaches for your cheek and makes you look at him, “nuh uh keep your eyes on me” he groans, making you whimper.
Ian lets go of you face and places his hands on you hips, rocking you in a slow pace. “tell me how it feels” he moans with his head slightly thrown back. “feels so good ian” you moan, you put your hand over his right one gripping your hip.
at that, ian speeds up his thrusts, holding on tighter to you. “sh-shit” he moans. the hotel room fills with the sounds of your moans mixed together, and the clapping from his harsh thrusts.
you jolt up at every thrust, the look in his eyes was so intimate. you reach up for his face, making him lean down to your touch. “i- fuck-“ he whispers, hiding his face in your neck. you moan back and hold his face in your hands, pulling him in for a kiss.
you kiss his lips and rest your forehead against his. “you’re perfect” he groans making you smile. “y-you too” you respond breathlessly making him smile and kiss your lips again.
Ian pulls away from you and continues his pace, his left hand letting go of your hip and moving to your clit, rubbing it. “Ian!” you moan gripping his arm, you could feel yourself reaching your high again. “oh fuck- please” your legs slightly shake around his shoulders, as you feel his fingers rub your clit.
“come on baby” he moans, his thrusts starting to become sloppy. you stare up into his eyes, lost in the pleasure. the feeling was so intimate you both couldn’t do anything but moan and reach your highs.
ian groans “fuck- im cumming baby” you moan in response, too lost in pleasure. you clench around his dick, feeling your self let go and cum. “oh-” you moan as tour legs tremble, Ian moans as you clench around him, making him cum. “fuuuck baby” he moans with his lips parted as he pulls put of you.
you lay down on the bed, catching your breath as ian goes to the bathroom to grab a towel. he comes back to you and chuckles seeing you still laying down. you cover your face as you blush, “stop ian” he laughs and cleans you up, before helping you back into your pants.
your both now fully dressed and holding each other on the bed, Ian’s hands run over your hair as you both sit in silence. it wasn’t an awkward silence at all, its was a comfortable silence, no worry or doubt in the sex you both just had.
“let me be your boyfriend,” he whispers before kissing your forehead “ive always wanted us to happen, always.”
you open your eyes and look up at him with a smile before nodding, “me too.” he smiles and pulls you in for a passionate kiss before pulling away and falling asleep holding each other.
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android404 · 16 days ago
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so I’ve been feeling insane about a WinterHawk Werewolf!AU, cause it’s kinda perfect for them
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cookiescribble · 1 year ago
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spencer x british!reader
as a brit i would love to see a fic of a reader with a british accent and spencer adores it and mimics her sometimes
Taking It In (Spencer Reid x British Fem!Reader)
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A/N: Thank you so much for the request! This is a bit of a team effort because I’m a bit more knowledgeable about British culture (in no means an expert, I just had a hyperfixation on the Beatles and Doctor Who in middle school/ high school lmao) but Mod Angel is usually the one who writes for fem!readers. Also, we’re both American so we hope this is what you wanted! Sorry for the little wait - Mod Ghost
We also just binged season 2 of Heartstopper and tried our best to pick up on some of the language because we thought this was a really cute idea and wanted to write it as best we could! - Mod Angel
~~~
“Coffee? I thought that people from the UK drank tea?” Spencer piped up from behind as his girlfriend was pouring coffee into one of the paper cups she’d found around the canteen. 
“It heavily depends on who you’re talking to, Spencer. I feel you should know just as well as I do that everyone’s different. You didn’t profile me as soon as we started dating?” Y/N joked, to which he looked puzzled.
“Wha–no, I usually try to keep my job separate from…personal relations.” He replied sheepishly, starting to mix up his own mug of coffee. 
“That changed when we started dating, didn’t it, love?” She teased him, patting his shoulder.
It made him blush and stutter like mad, his hands waving around as he tried to scramble to find something to say. It was rare to see him speechless, but she couldn’t help but to smirk as she watched him struggle. It only lasted a few more seconds before she cut him off, reaching out and gently touching his hand.
“It’s alright, I was just being cheeky, that’s all. C’mon, let’s go back to workin’ on the case, okay?” She chuckled, leading him away from the counter with the hand that wasn’t holding her coffee resting at the small of his back as they walked. 
“I knew that!” He squealed in his own defense, which made her giggle loudly. 
*
A few weeks later, the BAU were out to dinner, taking a small break while in the middle of a case. Though, it wasn’t much of a break, considering they were still talking about the profile.
Spencer pointed to a plate in the middle of the table. “Can I have a chip?”
A confused silence fell over the table as they all looked in his direction. Spencer stared back at them, an eyebrow raised in his own confusion.
“What?” Spencer asked finally, breaking the silence.
“What did you just say?” JJ responded with a smirk, raising an eyebrow at him. 
“I asked if you could pass me a chip” he answered, pointing to the plate again.
“Where do you see chips?” Hotch chimed in, concerned for his mental stability. 
Still confused, Spencer pointed to the plate again.
“The fries?” Penelope clarified, gesturing to the same plate finally. 
“Oh.” He nodded awkwardly. “Yeah, can you pass me a fry?”
“You’re really spending too much time with that girlfriend of yours, aren’t you?” Morgan teased, grinning and playfully nudging his shoulder.
He smiled and shrugged. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said in a faux-English accent as he finally got the ‘chip’ he wanted as the rest of the table laughed. 
“Speaking of Y/N, where is she tonight?? I miss that girl.” Garcia complained from the other side of the table, 
“Oh, she went out with one of her mates–” Spencer started before Prentiss cut him off from where she was sat next to him, 
“Mates??” She asked incredulously, seconds away from giggling as he groaned and leaned back in his chair. 
“FRIENDS! Her friends.” he grumbled, finishing his food and making a mental note to not only tell but blame his girlfriend, Y/N, for everything he’d been through tonight. Not before giving her a kiss, though. The fact that she wasn’t here just made him realize how much he missed her, and it made him wonder if there was a correlation between missing her and talking like her.
The girls dropped him off at home a few hours later, where the first thing he said when he saw Y/N was ‘this is your fault’.
“Do you…want to elaborate on that or…?”
“Later.” Was all he said before he was hugging her and burying his head in her shoulder. 
She tugged him close, feeling him start breathing deeply against her shoulder as if he was falling asleep and tapped him to wake him up a bit so she could start leading him to their room. “Come along, darling, let’s get you into bed. You seem tired.” 
“I know that they’re fries but you say chips…it’s cute…” he mumbled as he walked, only adding to the confusion but she chalked it up to him being tired from a long day and let it go for now as she tucked him in with a smile at how cute he was. 
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celestie0 · 10 months ago
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kickoff! reader who is stalking gojos page and accidentally likes one of his oldest posts. she panics and turns off her phone, without unliking it.
kickoff!gojo who is re reading your guys instagram messages and you text him while he’s doing this. he scrambles to come up with a reason as to why he read your message instantly
kickoff! reader who tries to watch soccer games to understand what’s happening. she probably yells offsides at everything. gojo can only smile at her and offer to help her out
kickoff! gojo who takes a picture of your silhouette in front of those statues you meet up at during the sunset (without your knowledge) and makes it his lock screen. you ask him about it but he just pretends that it’s a soccer goal and the sunset behind it.
kickoff! reader who finds herself thinking of satoru way too much. will see basically anything and be reminded of him. “oh a pair of sunglasses? gojo would like those” “hm, they started selling a strawberry tea? gojo would drink that”
kickoff! gojo who loves the sims. unironically makes a sim version of him and reader. tbh he probably doesn’t even realize he’s doing it, he just starts thinking about reader and starts adding her features. thinks it’s funny to make them have “fun time”
kickoff! reader who is looking through the game pictures she takes and finds herself staring at gojo. doesn’t even realize she’s doing it until mina walks in on her. think peter parker and gwen stacy
kickoff!gojo who has a full “project m’bappe” for your future kids. starts the kids off with a soccer plush and it leads to them being absolute powerhouses in toddler leagues
kickoff! reader who used to play soccer as a kid. threw a tantrum in the middle of a game because she decided she hated it. only started to like it again because of gojo
kickoff! gojo who keeps a printed out picture of the two of you in his wallet. Suguru took it at the frat party when gojo kissed you. around you is blurry and flashing lights, in the middle of the chaos is gojos lips pressed against yours. His hand is holding your waist, you’re slightly on your tippy toes to reach him. He sometimes zones off when paying because the picture catches his eye
BABE……..WHEN I TELL YOU IM BLUSHING N SQUEALING N KICKING MY FEET SM RN…..UHHH I THINK U MIGHT HAVE TO JUST TAKE OVER WRITING THE SERIES FOR ME??? bc i went thru sm emotions reading these pls 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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ok first of all tysm for thinking of these and sending them to me???? i genuinely cannot believe youve made headcanons for my fic that’s so surreal n i will forever remember this 😭😭
BUT ALSO THESE ARE SO ACCURATE PLS and all the little details omg it means sm that youve noticed all these lil thinfs throughout the fic n their relationship n i cld cry rn 😭😭
pls excuse me for addressing each n every one of these bc im so excited by them i fear this ask will be long so i’m adding a keep reading loool
sobsosbsosbsbsossbb the headcanons ab their digital fuckups LMAOO omg reader is 100% the type to be stalking him at 3am even tho she swears shes not even THAT down bad for him n then she loses all feeling in her face when she realizes she liked a post from when he was like in high school or sumn🧍🏻‍♀️there’s no coming back from that LMFAOO but i feel like gojo wldnt even notice it bc he probs gets a lot of notifs so she’s safe this time around 😭😭 BUT YOURE ALSO SO RIGHT AB HIM REREADING MESSAGES N THEN GETTING SPOOKED WHEN HE REALIZES SHE SAW THAT HE READ IT RIGHT AWAY LMAO i feel like he’d pull something like “uhhhh i was just about to trxt you, that’s why” and she’s like “🤨 this is the fifth time that’s allegedly happened”
aww reader trying to understand soccer for him 😭 thats so cute bahah also i made another headcanon recently from another anon who mentioned gojo streaming the world cup hehe it’d be so cute if reader shows up to the frat game nights in the jersey of the team that gojo’s rooting for bc she’s just trying to be a supportive girlfriend n she gets excited watching the game but she’s actually got no clue what tf is going on 💀 but gojo adores her for it so thats ok
the lockscreeennn that’s so cute 😭 also i love the idea of reader being his muse too :”) like he doesn’t know much about photography but bc of her he’s like kinda curious about it now so he’s always taking pictures of her w his phone while she’s not looking :”) i imagine his camera roll is just a bunch of candids of her while she’s dissociating off into the distance or something 🤣 n he’s like “wow so pretty im so good at this”
OK BUT READER IS ME THINKING AB GOJO EVERYWHERE I GO LMAOO no but srs that one made heart skip a beat bc how sweeettt is that 😭 i think that is a true mark of love where u think of someone everywhere you go :”) for gojo, i imagine that anytime he sees anything scenic or colorful or something like blooms of flowers or a nice sky he thinks of how she wld probably really love to take pics of it n he gets sad she’s not there to do so
okk im down for sims boyfriend gojo 🤣 and wdym by fun time omg 😭 pls dont tell me it’s possible to make people BONK on sims. ive seen a lot of tiktoks recently about how they added gojo to stardew valley n ppl have been marrying him lmfaoo i wonder if gojo wld try to marry her in sims 💀 cant tell if thats cute or creepy PLS tbh i’d probs be like “aww babe”🧍🏻‍♀️
and YES AB THE ONE WHERE SHE STARES AT GOJO’s PICS THATS PRACTICALLY CANON, also, there was supposed to be a scene exactly like that in ch8 where mina walks in on her staring at the pics she was editing for her professor 😭😭 so ur 100% right on. i just bet he looks so handsome in those photos cuz he’s concentrated n sweaty n probs looks really determined n in his element tbf i’d be starinf at those pics too LOL
YOURE SO RIGHT HAHA he’d make sure their kids are soccer prodigies 😭😭 startin them YOUNG. reader’s like “dont u think they’ve practiced enough today…they’re supposed to go to that birthday party at noon” and he’s like “THE GRIND NEVER STOPS😤🔥” 💀💀 unironically the type of dad that wakes his kids up at 5am on summer break to take em to soccer bootcamp or sumn 😭😭 ok but he knows theyre just kids n lets them have fun haha obviously but he just has high expectations for them lmaoo
im so tender to the idea of reader having played soccer in her youuuuthh how cute wld it be if she unknowingly also had a crush on gojo back when they were kids (maybe there was some sort of co-ed game they played ONCE when their elementary schools organized it n she was like omg who’s that boy over theree n it’s just 8 y/o gojo who’s got all the 2nd grade girlies swooning even back then 🤣) but in adulthood she probably doesnt rememebr that at all haha OMGGGG I NEED TO MAKE THIS CANON BC HOW ADORABLE WOULD IT BE IF GOJO’s MOM HAD TAKEN A PICTURE OF THE GAME BACK THEN N U CAN SEE LITTLE GOJO N LITTLE READER ARE IN THE SAME PHOTO im gonna sob???? im so inspired by these rn??? anon??? can i fr hug u through the screen???
omggg ok im deceased im dead ab the PICTURE IN HIS WALLET. THAT IS SO HUSBAND CODED and adorabke asf i just might melt rn 😭 him getting distarcted while paying kakskddjhd also i can imagine him having a picture in his wallet of her in her cap n gown on n stoles n everything during graduation or something bc it reminds him of their college days :”) n when he’s playing away games during national league he’s always looking at it when he’s away from home bc he misses her
also i feel like suguru might’ve taken the photo as a polaroid 🤔 now i headcanon that kickoff reader also has a polaroid camera bc why wouldnt she lmfaoo 🤣 but just imagine the polaroid relationship wall LOL its so corny but i wld want them to make one together 😩💕
screaming. crying. feeling so inspired rn. cheesing. cheeks r hurting. love u sm anon srs if you have more i will gobble them up like a turkey. LOVE YOU <333
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gleasonlovesjasontodd · 1 year ago
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OKAY THIS IS MY BIG UPDATE
ALSO SCROLL IF YOU DONT WANNA HEAR YES I USED ALL THE JASON TODD TAGS BECAUSE PEOPLE FIND MY UPDATES THIS WAY AND HAVE ASKED ME TO USE THEM
so he texted me saying he missed me and if i wanted to come over and stay the night and i was like yes so i drove over surprised i didn’t get a ticket lmao and i texted saying i was there and he came outside shirtless abs showing and I asked him why he was shirtless and he said because I was just working out and i’m pretty sure i died dead at that moment and he gave me a pretty long kiss and carried my bag inside and said my bow looked cute we then ordered food and i bought him a lego set he wanted and we started building it and mind you he is 6’5 i am 6��2 which i am short next to him and i was standing up to put something on the lego set and that when i took the biggest risk and said he reminded me of jason todd because i mean he literally is and he laughed and pulled me onto his lap and was smirking and saying i could see that and i was giggling because that’s what i do when i’m nervous and then we kissed and that turned into making out got a hickey then i stoped it because i was getting nervous and he said that it’s okay BUT I DID GET TO TOUCH THE ABS AND GOD DAMN I’M LUCKY and we layed on the couch together and i layed on him and that’s when he told me he really likes me and enjoys being around me and loves my laugh thinks i’m the prettiest girl and that i have such a good heart and he asked me to be his girlfriend and i obviously said yes and we kissed before we played uno because that’s also something we bonded over was playing uno when we first met and then (this is probably very embarrassing but i watch wwe 😔 it got good again after not watching since middle school and i love a good scripted show) and so i was like looking at it on my phone cause it was a paper view and he said you watch that very suprised not a lot of people think i would like that kinda stuff and i said yeah i just got back recently into it and he said i have not watched that since elementary do you wanna watch it on the tv and he didn’t laugh at me tease me and we basically watched but i fell asleep on him and he carried me up to his bedroom and kissed me and i got to sleep on his chest and omg i still can’t believe and the next morning we went and had breakfast at this local place and went to barnes and noble and he bought me calico critters because i talked about them like he said showed me them and then just bought me them which i hate that he keep buying me things makes me feel bad and then we went back to his house and watch the football games so i could watch taylor and travis also forgot to say in the last post i was at nationals last week and he sent me flowers cause i was nervous and stressed BUT ANYWAY I HAVE A BOYFRIEND TOOK EIGHTEEN YEARS BUT I KNEW IT WOULD PAYOFF NOT DATING SOME FOOTBALL OR BASEBALL GUY (not that anything is wrong with just actually yes they are terrible and now i have a nerdy hot boyfriend)
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justalia · 5 months ago
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hello alia
I have a situation with law of assumption.. I was wondering if you could give some advice, anything is okay.
it might be long, but I like your vision on things so I thought you were the best to ask this to:
I’ve been into manifestation since middle school like back in 2018 and it was a wild ride because I didn’t know how to apply it, so I was on the loop.
then i discovered Neville on 2020 and tried to apply his teachings and I kinda had some “tiny” manifestations but never the ones that I wanted.
in 2023 i fell in love with this sort of Instagram influencer (and this is going to be really embarrassing to confess ngl) and I had a huge crush on him, so I tried to manifest him.
i became so obsessed over law of assumption, the terms of 4D/3D, Edward Art, I was into every single corner of the internet reading and filling my brain with this philosophy.
i can’t describe to u how obsessed I became for this guy, like I replied to his stories (not in a crazy way) but since he never replied or had an interaction with me I became obsessed , like, I had PANIC ATTACKS over him. I cried and became obsessive over a guy that never interacted w me.
My day fully depended on what happened mentally w him, and it became so horrible that I developed a limerence… it was awful
So I stopped trying to manifest him, and my life got better.
Then I met another guy, and same thing happened (not as crazy but kind of obsessive as well), and then I “gave up” and then I tried again w another dude and got the same result.
That same year, I got bullied by people at high school so I was always trying visualize and affirm like crazy that people liked me and never rejected me, but of course nothing happened. So I became depressive as well.
I stopped trying to manifest. I stopped reading about it, and my mental health was better!
Now, with me saying all of this, im not discarding the existence of law of assumption or conscious creation AT ALL. As I said before, I know it happens because it happened to me. I unconsciously brought some things into my life that I’ve imagined before, but only that. Never the things that I actually deeply want.
2024 arrives and I wanted to give it another shot, but my brain didn’t not wanted me to feel the “wish fulfilled” because i feel like it’s protecting me from feeling “delusional” and “hopeful” from things again. I can feel fulfilled for a while and then this sort of chest pressure comes again and my brain convinces me to give up.
No matter how hard I try to feel the best for me on the inside, my brain rejects it and tells me “what if you end hopeful again” what if that doesn’t happen?”. And that feels engraved to my being
So I honestly do not know if there’s any hope for me when it comes to bringing things into my life. I’ve always wanted the best for me, and I don’t know if I should keep trying to get rid of that belief but I sincerely don’t know how.
Since I applied the law incorrectly it feels like I don’t even know how to do it no more lmao
It’s sad because i can imagine such beautiful things but my mind only gives me the chance to feel them as a dream not as a reality no more.
i used to imagine myself with guys a lot but I wasn’t fulfilled at all, you know?? so I screwed the ability to consciously create for myself.
I could have anything but my brain is like “nope. you’re imagining. Stop doing it.” Like as an attempt to protect myself.
The sad part is that I like a guy, I follow him on insta and I replied to him something random on one of his stories and I was like “what if I fulfill myself” and tried to change the inner man but nothing worked.
Is there any chance? Can I do something to fix this at all?
Because if I can’t, I will give up and stop exhausting myself. But I do want to trust in myself, I feel like I can do better… but how? how can I change the inner man when I feel so hurt by life?
i hope you read this and if you know what I can do, please do. I like your views
Have a nice day Alia, and I’m glad you’re combing back ♡︎
i say give up.
i say stop trying to “change the inner man”.
i say look within and discover who you really are.
find the who.
who is this inner man? is it an higher being an abstract entity? who is it?
find who you are, notice who you are and all your struggles will stop, the feeling delusional, the hopelessness will stop.
find who you are and there will be no desire no more.
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niki-phoria · 2 years ago
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i want to request for jake.
the enhypen members meet his boyfriend for the first time, who’s much taller than jake (like jake has to kind of tip toe to kiss him). they find him intimidating at first, but after meeting him, they seem to like him.
- 🕊️
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pairing: jake x male!reader (he/him pronouns) genre: fluff word count: 965
includes: reader is taller than jake, blushy jake, reader is kinda socially awkward lmao, the switch between them being awkward and then enha liking reader is a little weird
a/n: thank you for requesting !! i actually really love this trope but i'm not intimidating at all lmao i hope you like it :))
requests open !! read my rules first
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“are you sure about this?” you anxiously crack your knuckles once again as jake slowly drives up to the hybe building. giant windows coating the entire building reflect the setting sunlight into your eyes, casting the surrounding area in a gentle golden glow. 
“of course i am,” jake replies. he glances over at you momentarily before refocusing on the road to pull into the parking space. you wipe your sweaty hands onto your jeans in an attempt to calm yourself down.
jake reaches over, gently patting your thigh before reaching up to grab your hand. “y/n, you’re the love of my life. you mean everything to me. i love being an idol but i also love you.” he pauses to intertwine your hands together, gently squeezing your hand. “i want the most important people in my life to meet. they’re gonna love you. i know they will.” 
you turn to look at him, searching for reassurance in his dark eyes. they shine a light golden brown in the sunlight - the colour of honey and caramel. you take another deep breath to fully calm yourself down before nodding once again. “okay. let’s go.” 
jake smiles as you walk around the front of the car. he takes your hand into his once again, leaning up to press a kiss against your jawline. it’s a small gesture but one that brings you great comfort - even as you follow your beloved boyfriend up the steps to meet some of the most important people in his life. 
an uneasy feeling settles into your stomach as you walk up to the door. with one final shaky breath, you turn back to jake and nod as he pushes the door open. eight pairs of eyes are on you immediately as jake walks into the room with a bright smile and you in tow. “everyone, this is y/n, my boyfriend,” he introduces. 
you lean down to bow to them before mustering up all of your nerves and willing your voice not to shake when you speak. “hello. it’s a pleasure to meet you all.” 
“i’m heeseung,” the man greets. he gives you a small bow in turn before smiling. “it’s nice to meet you.” 
the rest of the boys are quick to follow, each offering their own bow and a variety of smiles and waves. their friendliness immediately eases some of your nerves. jake smiles at you, squeezing your hand as he leads you closer to the group. 
you settle a seat in the circle they’re created on the ground in between jake and sunghoon. he keeps your hands tightly intertwined as you tug his hand into your lap to play with his fingers - an anxious habit you’d picked up over the years. your fingers twist his chunky rings around and draw small shapes against the soft skin.
“so, where did you guys meet?” jay asks. it’s a question he already knows the answer to - all of them do. jake’s loving rambles about how you looked on a date or a joke you told him while you were out together at dinner are all they’re heard from him for the past few months since you first mustered up the courage to ask him out. 
jake gives you a reassuring nod before you answer. “we met a few years ago in sydney. i had just moved to australia and he offered to show me around our middle school.” 
“he was a new student,” jake explains. 
“jake-hyung said you guys lost contact when he moved here,” sunoo says. “did you move for a reason?”
“honestly?” you look over at jake with a small smile before answering. “i wanted to see him again. i missed him and i was given an opportunity to move out to incheon to study so i took it immediately.” you can feel jake’s eyes linger on you in his surprise. flustered by the sudden attention, you return to playing with his fingers for a few seconds. “honestly i wasn’t expecting to fall in love with him, but… i’m grateful.” 
when you finally build up the courage to look at jake again, he’s looking at you with a flushed face and a soft smile. in lieu of answering verbally he simply reaches over to pull you into a sweet kiss. he pulls away as soon as a few playful groans fill the room, laughing as you hide your face behind his shoulder. he squeezes your hand once again to let you calm yourself down. 
“you know, jake-hyung never stops talking about you,” niki chuckles. you pull back from where you were hiding to listen to him. niki laughs as jake begins to playfully swat at him in an attempt to make him stop talking. 
“you’re cute together,” jungwon smiles. 
“i’m a little jealous,” sunghoon murmurs. 
jake stifles a laugh before retorting. “you should be.” 
“hey!” you laugh with the others as sunghoon reaches over you to playfully push jake. you let go of his hand momentarily as he dramatically falls to the floor. 
he lets out a gasp, barely lifting his head just enough to look at you. you poorly stifle a laugh as jake brings a hand up to rest over his heart before collapsing back down. “i can’t believe it! betrayed! by my own boyfriend!” 
“sorry babe,” you laugh. 
“don’t be,” sunghoon chuckles, patting your shoulder. “he deserves it.” 
jake sits up with another huff, playfully knocking his shoulder against yours. “you’ve only known him for twenty minutes and you’ve already corrupted him.” 
“so you were expecting them to ‘corrupt’ me?” jake purses his lips as he turns to look at you. you smile, simply leaning in to pull him into a sweet kiss. 
“i hate you,” he mumbles. 
“you love me,” you hum. “and so do they.”
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ladyosen · 2 years ago
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Adeuce arranged marriage au plot bunny
Adeuce arranged marriage AU idea.  Arranged marriages are a common thing for mages in their world and Deuce and Ace’s moms arrange a marriage when they are like itty bitty babies.
They decide to bring them together every summer so that they wont be marrying complete strangers.  And maybe they’ll just naturally develop chemistry.
It goes about as well as one would expect lmao!  Really it’s a lot like canon, but maybe a little less hostile because kids.  But they kind of develop a like brother’s style relationship, you know as kids do.  Sometimes fighting like cats and dogs and other times they’re thick as thieves.
Then in middle school, Deuce goes through his deliquent phase and Ace is wtf.  and let’s face it, we know Ace wouldn’t tolerate that bullshit at all (even though he thinks Deuce looks really cool and kind of hot when he’s in bad boy mode.)  But they eventually have a big fight and both say some things and throw fists and spells and it’s pretty relationshipship ending?  And definitely engagement ending, right?
Like their parent’s don’t officially end it, but Deuce’s mom sees no point in going through with it when her son is being that kind of person.  Which probably feeds into the moment when he catches her crying over his bad behavior and has his big realization.  That and Deuce also has a lot of super truthful criticisms Ace made sticking in his head as well, so Deuce decides to change like in canon.
I’m not sure if during this time Ace dates that one girl he mentioned or not, because I actually feel like Ace is upright enough to not do that while engaged, though I can also see him being like “that’s something our parent’s decided.”  Also he’s mad and maybe curious and it goes like... in canon and he dumps her, also probably with a side realizing he’d have enjoyed hanging out with Deuce more.  And now Ace wishes he’d handled their fight differently even though he still thinks he was right.
Honestly, they’re both realizing they actually enjoyed each other’s company and those visits were the best part of summer vacation.  But well, they fucked it up and both have a little too much pride to just talk it out.  They don’t see each other that summer and it feels really damn lonely.
It’s only when they both get enroll in Night Raven College that they finally meet again.  Ace probably heard from his Mom about Deuce enrolling, but tried to play it off as nothing, because you know, we’re probalby not going to even be in the same dorm.  Deuce probably... some how managed not to hear it from his Mom.  She mentioned Ace was enrolled while he was half asleep or something and he forgot and she probably didn’t push him about it.
So when they see each other in the mirror chamber, they’re both dumbstruck.  Like... Ace is shocked by how much Deuce changed back to who he used to be.  Deuce is actually really glad to see Ace again and wants to like... clear the air and apologize.  But well they’re both prideful so it’s really awkward.  So like the prolouge chapter is them eventually clearing the air and making up and they like have big ex-boyfriend energy for the early part of the story (except they insist they’re not exes.)  Eventually at sometime someone (probably Cater) finds out they were engaged (Ace made some comment on magicam or something) and no they can never live it down.  All the couple jokes are like... amplifiied.
That said, I like to think they slowly work things out and realize they like each other and admit they actually do want to get married (I like to think sometime around ghost marriage because Deuce got jealous seeing Ace confess to Eliza and ended up owning up to it and teased Ace about his whole ideal relationship spiel and Ace admitted he had Deuce in mind during it) .
But they are still dumbasses and sometimes everyone wonders how they will survive marraige, but it’s also like, it works for them.
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ambrosialdesire · 2 years ago
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I saw your post about yandere Levi so I was wondering what your thoughts would be on yandere Jean? (I’m ngl I can’t really picture him as a yandere but he’s so fine.)
to this day, i think his s4 hair is still kinda goofy (pls don't come for me haha it's simply my opinion, maybe it's because i'm still used to his old hair lolol)
my thoughts on yandere jean are kinda standard. as of now, i can only see him as a yandere that's not going to have much changes to his personality, whether or not the reader is an enemy or on his side. yeah if you're an enemy, he's first going to be a little hesitant on making a move on you but regardless, his outcome/methods are the same. he's not my most favorite character but i do like him and his character. back in middle school, i used to be OBSESSED with reading eren x reader x jean because of the conflict LMAO
sorry this is kinda short compared to my levi post, guess i gotta write more yandere!jean if i want to get used to his character haha
again this is sorta written as a gender neutral reader but it's also slightly implied to be a fem reader.
tw: manipulation, inappropriate touching, possessive behavior, implied non-con, jealousy themes
anyways back to yandere jean explanation. for me, he's not the one that's going to strike first. he’s the one that’s gonna wait it out till the end, but he will have his influences in order to get what he wants. he's cunning and observant, using what he's seen and known so he can properly manipulate. to the untrained eye, it seems that he's just cocky about being able to do this but he's secretly nervous and doubtful in his abilities, constantly thinking if what he's doing is morally correct. he's still as temperamental as he was when he was a trainee but it now eats him on the inside; he doesn't express his anger that much anymore but his jealousy is at a consistent all time high.
to his friends and other soldiers, jean just seems like normal jean. sure, he's a little overprotective and tends to move you away from the others so it would be just the two of you. sure, he may tell you things about your friends that make you think twice on why you're still talking to them. sure, sometimes you can feel his hands wander a little more than you're used to. but that's only because he knows what's best for you, right? jean promises he's everything but a dishonest man, he's only looking out for you!
jean is also known to be quite the daydreamer too, imagining a homely life with you despite the circumstances going around in the world around him. he loves the thought of you and him being all domestic, a child on your hip while you waited for dinner to finish before he came home from work. sometimes the daydreams wander into something more steamy but it's always quickly cut short because of the others interrupting it. he swears to god that everyone has it out for him whenever he has a daydream about you, like it's some kind of sixth sense.
he's always going to be a little mean to you, always teasing you but he always means well (in his standards at least). i wouldn't say he's a complete tsundere about his feelings but he definitely flirts, feeling embarrassed in secret about it afterwards. remember, he may seem confident on the outside but he always feels a little doubtful internally. he's definitely a force to mess with whenever someone else tries to flirt with you, he has a bite behind his bark at all times.
but when jean gets jealous, it quite literally takes over him. it's always a sickly, crawling feeling that resonates in the pit of his stomach to the edges of his fingertips. his temper is ten times worse too and he gets super insecure, to the point where he'll just straight up grab you and pull you into somewhere that's seclude enough to fuck you raw. he always puts in jabs about if the other person is better than he is and if the kindness he gave to you meant nothing at all. the hate-fucking always leaves you a sobbing mess, begging for his forgiveness and blubbering about how you only wanted him. then and only then will he comfort you, kissing your tears away and quietly apologizing, again repeating that everything he does to you is for your own good.
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training4theapocalypse · 2 years ago
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Finders Keepers Ch 5. (Cormac McLaggen x fem!reader)
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Rating: Explicit 18+
Word Count: 4.3k
Warnings: SMUT!!!!!!!!! Kissing, Dry humping, Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me all the time like Blondie check out my Chrissy behind it's fine all of the time.
Summary: It's the night of Slughorn's party and you're ready to make McLaggen jealous.
A/N: I said I wasn't gonna post til Sunday but I am too impulsive!!! Here is some recommended listening: Escapism by RAYE and Daylight by David Kushner (thank you anon for the latter recommendation). P.S. You can tell I'm not actually a Ravenclaw because my door riddle was SHIT lmao.
Masterlist
Tag list: @countlambula
Chapter 5: Firewhisky
Two weeks later, you sit on the same spot on the edge of Marietta’s bed, this time lacing up your strappy stilettos. You point your wand at your feet. ‘Molliare’ you think, silently casting a cushioning charm so you can walk with ease in your heels.
Cho and Marietta join you as you walk over to the mirror, they stand behind you like proud parents.
“Stunning,” says Cho looking at you in the mirror.
“Yes, well, enough about the dress,” says Marietta, admiring her alterations. “Zacharias is going to feel like he’s won the Daily Prophet Grand Prize Draw when he sees you.”
Ugh, you almost forgot about Smith. 
You admire yourself in the mirror and you have to admit- this is probably the best you’ve ever looked. Thanks to Marietta, your form-fitting cobalt blue dress seems to glow ethereally in the candlelight. She’s given you a high leg split and its generously low-cut bodice accentuates every curve of your body.
“Okay, toss your head forward and mess up your hair a wee bit,” says Cho. You flip your head down and back up and push your tousled hair behind your ear. “Perfect - it looks like you’ve just finished a very steamy snogging session.”
“Fuck, I’m nervous.” You reach out and hold both of their hands. “I wish you were coming.”
“Okay, Captain,” says Cho, imitating your most authoritative dressing-room voice. “What’s the game plan? Let’s go over positions.” Strangely, it helps your nerves.
“Meet Smith downstairs and arrive late. Don’t even look at McLaggen. Impress Gwenog. Still don’t look at McLaggen. Have a few drinks and hit the buffet-”
“Have one drink. No bread or you’ll burst out of that dress,” warns Marietta.
“One drink to stay reasonably sober,” you repeat, ignoring the last part. “Wait for McLaggen to approach me. Brush him off casually. Leave conspicuously and in an extra giggly fashion with Zacharias Smith then report back to you two in the common room.”
“Well remembered.”
“Shouldn’t I just snog Smith in front of him?”
“No!” says Marietta. 
“It’ll be way worse in his head if he doesn’t see you. Leave it to his imagination,” nods Cho knowledgeably.
God, dealing with boys was such hard work. You look at your two friends sincerely- they’re extremely skilled in this particular art of war. 
“Thank you- both of you. This was insanely hard work, I mean, this dress, Marietta…” You check yourself out in the mirror again. “It’s beautiful, really. I’m sorry if I’ve ever been sort of disparaging towards this stuff before. As if it’s any less worthwhile than Quidditch or school. It’s just… I’m not used to being bad at things.”
They understand. You don’t need to say any more as the three of you embrace in the middle of the dorm room.
“Right,” says Cho, wiping her eyes. “You’d better go before Zacharias thinks you’ve stood him up.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Slughorn’s office looks like a beautifully decadent circus tent. The walls are draped with emerald, crimson and gold hangings, contrasting with the striking blue of your dress.
You walk in, arm-in-arm with Smith who looks incredibly pleased with himself. When you met him earlier on the marble staircase he actually did a double take before saying your name questioningly, as if he didn’t believe it was you.
“Fuck off, Smith, I don’t look that different.”
“Ladylike as ever, I suppose,” he scoffed and you rolled your eyes.
But now as you walk in, you keep your head high and smile at other students you recognise, as if you’re delighted to be here with Smith. Murmurs ripple through the crowd, as the two of you pass through- you hope it’s your dress that’s causing a commotion but you resign yourself to the fact that your classmates are probably just surprised to see you here with a boy.
Tactics, remember tactics. 
“Let’s get a drink,” you whisper, marching him towards a tower of champagne flutes. You grab one and drain it quickly, using the opportunity to discreetly scan the room for McLaggen. 
He’s across the room, determinedly talking to Hermione. You have a satisfied feeling that he’s trying not to look at you.
You dump your empty glass, grab another for courage, and link Smith’s arm again, steering him to try and find Slughorn but you don’t need to go far before you hear a booming voice calling your name.
“Professor Slughorn! Thank you for inviting me,” you respond graciously, pretending you aren’t starstruck by his companion, Gwenog Jones. “This is Zacharias, he’s captain of the Hufflepuff Quidditch Team.”
“Oh! I thought- ” says Slughorn looking from you to Smith and then off into the room behind you. “Ah, never mind. I’m an old man, who knows less and less about young love these days.” Slughorn chuckles and Smith gives you a questioning look which you ignore. “Anyway, allow me to introduce Miss Gwenog Jones, Captain of the Holyhead Harpies. Gwenog, this is the Ravenclaw Quidditch Captain, I mentioned earlier.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” you say, shoving your drink into Smith’s hand and clasping hers when she reaches out to give you a handshake. “I’m a huge fan.”
“Old Sluggy’s been telling me all about you,” she says. 
“All good things, I hope?” You ask playfully of Slughorn who guffaws.
“Of course, of course!”
“I don’t suppose he mentioned our recent landslide victory against Slytherin?” You give her a winning smile, desperate to make a positive impression.
“He did… But I’m more interested in what he told me about your training.”
“My- my training?” you stumble - slightly surprised that Professor Slughorn knows anything about your training.
“I’ve told Miss Jones here all about you spending every evening on the pitch. I can see it from that window, you know.” He gestures to the window in the corner, obscured by the curtains. “You and McLaggen, practising for hours and hours and right in the middle of your N.E.W.Ts too… Oh, look, there he is!” Slughorn looks over your shoulder again and calls his name. “Not that you’d be interested in McLaggen for your all-female team, Gwen,” he chuckles. Slughorn spills a little champagne when he spots Harry Potter and practically runs over to join him, abandoning your group.
You bristle as McLaggen replaces Slughorn’s vacant space beside you. He shakes hands with Gwenog who, you remind yourself, he’s acquainted with already.
“As I was saying, Slughorn told me all about your win against Slytherin and while it piqued my interest, it was your work ethic that really got my attention. And he says you’re a keeper too?”
“A world-class one,” says McLaggen. “I’m surprised she hasn’t been snapped up by a professional team already.”
You blink at him in surprise. It’s very considerate of him to compliment you like that in front of Gwenog, even though you’re not speaking.
“And it’s you two who’ve been practising together every night?” she asks, noticing the look you give to McLaggen. “I mean, you’ve actually been training? Slughorn hasn’t been seeing you head off to the Quidditch pitch so you can snog privately or anything, has he?” She lets out a laugh like a bark.
“No! God, no,” you say quickly, and go to squeeze Smith’s arm but he’s already disappeared without you even noticing. 
“Absolutely not,” confirms McLaggen.
“Good,” she smiles. “Well, you’re not the usual build for a keeper, I must say. They usually look more like him - ha!” She nods at McLaggen. “But if you’re as good as he and Slughorn say you are, it sounds like I’d be stupid not to let you try out during the transfer window this summer.”
“That… that would be incredible. Thank you.” 
She bids you and McLaggen farewell and goes to mingle with the other guests. If you hadn’t fallen out with McLaggen, you’d grab him and jump up and down screaming for joy. Instead, you stand awkwardly, trying not to look at him.
Game plan, a small voice in your head reminds you but the champagne has loosened your sharp tongue.
“Well, you better not keep your girlfriend waiting,” you say, looking for Smith.
“Who told you that Hermione’s my girlfriend?”
“Hermione told Lavender who told Parvati who told Padma who told Cho who told me,” you rhyme off, trying to sound casual. 
“I thought you didn’t like gossip.” 
You shrug. “I just hear things.”
“Look, I know you don’t like her after what she did to Marietta-”
“Oh, is that what she said?”
“No, it’s what I know. I was in the D.A. with them too. You’re not the only one who hears things.”
Finally bringing yourself to look at him properly, you’re extremely annoyed to see that he looks incredibly handsome in his black shirt and dress robes. 
“So, have you snogged her?” You blurt before you can stop yourself.
“What?!”
“Have you snogged her?” you repeat slowly and clearly, knowing full well he heard you the first time.
“I’ll go and snog her right now if you’re so concerned.”
“Go ahead. It should be easy, right? If she’s your girlfriend and not just here to make Ron Weasley jealous. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find my date.”
He watches dumbfounded as you walk across the room to grab Smith aggressively and lead him by the hand out of the room. When you reach the corridor, you turn around and see that Smith looks like he can’t believe his luck.
“Oh,” you say, trying to think of a lie when you realise you really, definitely don’t want to snog him. “Sorry- I just wanted a bit of air. It’s so hot in there and my armpits are like, really sweaty.” You make up wildly.
Smith pulls a disgusted face and turns to go back in. “Wait!” you grab his arm and spin him back around. “Let me fix your hair.” You run your hand through it, messing it up slightly. “There, much better.”
He stares at you, stunned. “You are so weird.” He returns to the party and you groan, leaning against the indented archway in the wall and knocking your head back against it a few times in frustration. When you hear the click of high-heeled footsteps coming towards you, you flatten yourself inside the little cove so you’re not spotted alone. 
Hermione Granger whips past you without so much as a backwards look. You watch her as she walks as fast as she can in the direction of Gryffindor Tower. She’s ditched McLaggen, you realise. You thought you’d feel ready to gloat but instead you just feel… empty. Until recently he was your friend after all.
Returning to the party, you’re not sure what to do with yourself. The game plan has gone out the window.
You want to do everything you can to avoid Zacharias Smith, and you really don’t want to be paraded in front of a vampire by Slughorn like Potter is right now. The only person you actually want to talk to is Cormac McLaggen but lately, all you’ve been able to do is argue, that is when you’re not sitting in sullen silence during Potions. 
You decide you’d better mix with some other students. You spend some time chatting with Dean Thomas and Ginny Weasley who you recognise from the Gryffindor Quidditch team. They congratulate you on your win against Slytherin, and you return the compliment but only out of obligation as both victories make your teams the closest rivals on the table, competing for the top spot. You excuse yourself and cross the room to get another drink but Professor Snape halts you in your tracks. 
“Detention,” he says simply. 
“Sir, I-”
“The first Saturday after the holidays. And I expect you to be more suitably dressed for the occasion.”
You open your mouth to argue but think better of it. Any argument with Snape is likely to extend your detention to a week or even a month. More murmuring cascades around the room as he gestures to the door. It’s probably for the best, you think, that you leave before you drink any more. You got what you came for - an invite to the Holyhead Harpies tryouts. But you wish you’d just…
What do you wish?
That you’d made McLaggen jealous in the process? Or even just made up with him? Gone back to being friends. But could you ever swallow your pride and settle for being just friends? Surely that had to be better than whatever this feeling was right now.
Out of the hot room, the cool air hits you dizzyingly as you walk quickly along the corridor to the entrance hall. You see McLaggen ahead of you, near the front doors, in almost the exact same spot where you had your argument two weeks ago. 
Maybe being friends would be enough.
When he hears your footsteps he turns and groans “Oh, no. Not you.”
You catch up with him. “Always so disappointed to see me, McLaggen.”
“I’ve been chucked out. Snape gave me detention.”
“Me too,” you shrug. It’s not much of an olive branch but your instinct is to try and make him feel better. Misery loves company after all.
“You have?” He brightens up considerably. 
“He thought I wasn’t ‘suitably dressed’,” you say and his eyes follow your hands as you smooth the front of your satin dress. “What did you get chucked out for?”
“He caught me hiding behind the bar trying to drown my sorrows.” He pulls an entire bottle of Firewhisky from his cloak.
“Your sorrows?” 
He shrugs. “Doesn’t matter.”
“And he didn’t confiscate the bottle?”
“I pretended that I was about to vomit on his shoes and he just threw me out without noticing I still had it.” 
Without warning you both burst out laughing. Your stomach hurts from laughing at the idea of Snape dragging McLaggen out at arm’s length, trying to avoid being vomited on.
“Well, no wonder he was in such a foul mood when he saw me. I mean detention, for wearing a dress?”
“Personally, I agree with Snape,” His gaze lingers on you again. “It’s very distracting.”
“Oh, shut up.” 
“Just don’t ask me what colour it is. I haven’t noticed.”
You hit his arm. This is nice - the playful banter, both of you not sulking for the first time in weeks. It feels almost… normal. Until, with a small jolt, you remember it’s not.
“Don’t be a pig, McLaggen. You have a girlfriend.”
“She isn’t my girlfriend,” he says, leaning his head back against the wall. “We can’t stand each other.”
And there it is. The news you’d been secretly hoping for all night. The pit in your stomach feels much lighter.
“Where’s Smith anyway? He was looking pretty dishevelled when he came back from the corridor.”
You feel a pang of guilt. He’d noticed. And it doesn’t make you feel victorious in the way you’d thought it would. “I honestly couldn’t give a shit where he is.” He says nothing. You wonder if he’s been hoping for similar news too.
“Do you want some?” He asks eventually, shaking the bottle of Firewhisky and breaking the prolonged silence. You go to accept it but he says. “Not here - Snape and Filch will be prowling the corridors in a minute.”
“Quidditch stands?”
He nods and you exit the castle, walking side-by-side in the dark, down the path towards the pitch. It’s a frosty night and you feel your teeth chatter.
“Wait a sec.” He removes his heavy cloak and wraps it around your shoulders. It smells good. Like him. “Better?” You nod and take the bottle from him, so you can have a nip of Firewhisky. It burns your chest, spreading heat through your body.
The path ends when you get to the pitch and you feel your high heels sink into the grass. “Shit,” you hiss, freeing one of your stilettos.
“Right, up you get.” He stands in front of you and stoops slightly, so he can give you a piggyback. 
“You must be drunk if you think I’m letting you carry me.”
“Don’t argue for once in your life. Hurry up.”
You give him the bottle back before jumping up so he can carry you across the grass and underneath the stands. The familiar smell of amber and jasmine, this time mixed with Firewhisky and mud from the Quidditch pitch, reaches your nostrils. You resist the strong urge you have to lean into the crook of his neck and inhale.
He lets you off when you get to the wooden stairs. “Ladies first.”
“Remembered I’m not a bloke, have you?” you ask, walking up the stairs. Cho was right- he does always let you walk in front of him.
“If I thought you were a bloke, I wouldn’t constantly be staring at your arse.” He gives you a cocky grin. 
“Oh, well, by all means, carry on objectifying me then,” you say sarcastically and snatch the bottle from his hands before turning around quickly so he can’t see you smile. 
He follows you to the top of the stand where the pair of you sit, looking out onto the pitch and the snowy hills in the distance. 
“I’ve never noticed how beautiful it is up here,” you sigh. 
“Always been too busy watching the game?” 
You nod. 
“Same.” 
There’s still an awkward dark cloud hanging over your heads. You take another drink of Firewhisky and pass it back to him. 
“Right, out with it then.”
“What?” he asks.
“We can’t just act like the past couple of weeks haven’t happened.” Being brave, being vulnerable like this is something you’ve always found difficult and the bottle of liquid courage you and McLaggen are sharing doesn’t seem to be helping. 
You try to think of how to get the words out - if there’s one thing you’ve learned from spending more time with Cho and Marietta this year, it’s that it’s better to get this sort of thing out in the open. You take a deep breath, preparing for rejection but he beats you to the punch. 
“I’m an idiot.” He groans. “I just - I got it into my head that we’d go to the party together and you’d end up getting off with Gwenog Jones. So when Hermione asked me to go I jumped at the chance.”
“I don’t fancy Gwenog Jones-”
“-Then you turned up with Smith and that was even worse than what I imagined with Gwen.”
You draw his cloak around you and look at your shoes. “Well, I didn’t realise you had asked me to go to Slughorn’s party as friends.”
“I- I didn’t want to ask you as friends. Believe me. I thought I was kidding myself that you might be into me… everyone said I was stupid to even ask you.”
“Who’s everyone?”
“Belby-“
“Belby?!” You scowl. That moron. “Who else?” You demand.
“Well I’m not gonna say now, am I?” McLaggen laughs. “I can tell Belby’s about to regret it.”
Your face cracks into a smile. The aggression bubbling up in your chest evaporates into the frosty night air. His laugh gives you a new perspective - it’s as if you can step back from the scene and can see how daft it is to get so bothered by someone like Marcus Belby.
You look up at his face in the cold moonlight. Butterflies squirm in your stomach. He’s so distractingly good-looking - you can’t think properly when it’s just you and him like this. No quaffle or cauldron to divert your attention or give you a reason not to look at him for too long. 
“To be honest, I sort of thought Belby was right after all because you didn’t seem that keen when I asked you.”
“I hesitated because you make me nervous, Cormac,” you say softly, determined not to look away. It’s like looking into the sun.
“Yeah?” He’s still looking into your eyes but he feels closer now. 
“Don’t pretend you haven’t figured out by now that I like boys too.” You look from his eyes to his lips. “Well, not boys. Just… just one.”
His mouth is inches from yours. You can feel his breath on your lips. “If you say Smith, I’ll kill him.”
And there it is. You’re not sure whether it’s his possessiveness or the fact you’d really like to watch him hit Smith but something about that sentence makes you feral for him. You press your mouth against his, the burning taste of Firewhisky on both your lips. 
He kisses you back fiercely. It’s harder and rougher than the soft kisses you’ve experienced before but you like it. It means you can kiss him back the way you want to - you know he can handle it. You bite hard on his bottom lip in silent admonishment for what he’s put you through. And Cormac returns the favour, his hand roughly gripping the part of your thigh exposed by your dress. You wonder if he knows it’s for him. The absence of fabric - created for the sole purpose of seeking his attention.
You bring your arms behind his neck, pressing your body as close to him as you can and the Firewhisky falls from the bench and rolls on the floor, forgotten. He moves his hand under your thigh and drags you onto his lap so that you’re straddling him. Your lips meet again, crashing into each other and his tongue intrudes into your mouth, rolling over yours. You want to feel his mouth everywhere.
As if reading your mind, his lips leave yours to kiss along your jaw and down your neck. You lean back so he can draw his tongue along your collarbone and bury his face in your chest. Cormac’s strong hands grip your hips tightly, his thumbs pressing bruises into your hipbones without any indication of slowing down or showing restraint. 
From this position, you can feel his erection pressing into you. It’s the first time you’ve kissed a man like this but your body responds almost automatically, sending your hips grinding into him. The night air is below freezing but your skin feels burning hot between the weight of his cloak and the warmth of his body.
The difference in size and strength between you sends wild thoughts flashing through your mind of him pinning you down against the bench and savagely taking you there.
You run your fingers through his dark blonde hair, pushing his face into your cleavage in encouragement, feeling his hot tongue and rough chin against your chest as you grind yourself against him harder. The now hot and damp fabric of your underwear rubs against the hard bulge between your bodies, creating friction more electric than the one that’s been between you the past few weeks.
“Fuck…” he moans into your chest softly.
All evidence so far has pointed to Cormac being an ass man but you’re not so sure any more as he continues his vocal appreciation, licking and sucking your tits right here on the deserted stands.
Cormac’s hands move up from your hips to push your breasts together and he whines when one of your nipples peeks out over the top of your dress. He latches onto the small nub of skin and sucks, swirling his tongue around your nipple. 
“Cormac, fuck, that’s-”
But just what it is, is interrupted by the anguished moan of pleasure that leaves your lips when his teeth graze your sensitive skin. It echoes across the deserted pitch into the night. A noise that would be indiscernible in the usually busy stadium. Unable to take it anymore you push his chest back and stare into his eyes, breathing heavily. 
“We shouldn’t… we should go back to the castle,” you pant.
“Shouldn’t what?” He raises his eyebrows with a smirk, his slightly wet chin glistening in the dim moonlight. “I haven’t suggested anything.”
“I was talking to myself.”
He grins and helps you off of him so you can fix your dress. “Well, that was easily the best thing that’s happened to me in this stadium,” he says, adjusting himself too.
“Ah, maybe you’ll get a game one day,” you tease and cup his face, just so you can feel his stubbly chin against your palm again.  
He kisses your palm before taking your hand in his so you can walk back down the steps to the pitch together. When you get to the grass he insists on carrying you again but this time refuses to put you back down until you reach the castle steps. 
From a tower high above, Horace Slughorn looks out of the window of his now-empty office. The party has long finished. He chuckles to himself when he sees the silhouette of McLaggen emerging from the darkness, carrying you on his back towards the entrance hall, illuminated by the castle torches.
When you climb off him and make it to the top of the marble staircase, you kiss him goodbye one final time. This is the last time you’ll see him before you go home for the Christmas holidays tomorrow. You turn and leave for Ravenclaw Tower, while he goes off in the opposite direction to Gryffindor. 
“I can skip, I can be broken, I can burst, I can sing. What am I?” asks the bronze eagle knocker on the door. “A heart,” you say, ripping off your heels impatiently, waiting for the door to swing open. You need to wake up Cho and Marietta - you promised you’d tell them everything.
Chapter 6: First Name Basis
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baytpwk · 2 years ago
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Please bare with me. I haven’t written anything since middle school & I’m 20 now lmao.
Anyway, I did prompt number 2 but I did this before the anon suggested Eddie is the one in cuffs. So, hopefully someone else writes that for us all to read!
Also, I did first person cause it’s easier for me. Hope that’s okay 🫶🏼
@funsonmunson-again
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“You what?” I strained my neck trying my hardest to look over my shoulder at my boyfriend behind me.
“I…uh. Fuck, I can’t find the key.” I can see the slightest bit of the side of his head. I can tell he’s hiding his face in hopes that I can’t tell how worried he is. He isn’t doing a very good job.
“What do you mean you can’t find the key, Eddie?” I can feel my anger rising.
“I-I don’t know. I swear to God it was right here.” I can sense him starting to move around. Throwing down blankets and pillows off the bed in hopes to see the little silver key attached to a guitar key chain with his name on it that I got him for his last birthday.
I’m furious. Furious that he can’t find the key, but even more furious I’m in such a vulnerable position. Ass up, face down into our bed sheets, bare as the day i was born. My hands resting on my lower back, cuffed. Thighs slightly shaking from the intense orgasms I just received. I swear the restraint is getting tighter the angrier I get.
“Eddie, please find it. Oh my god.” I say with a small whimper as I turn my head into the bed with a huge sigh.
“I will baby, I’m sorry.” He states with his hand caressing my side. He leans down to kiss my shoulder before going back to searching.
“It’s okay, just hurry please. It hurts.” I can’t stay mad at him, this was my idea after all.
“Found it!” I hear from what sounds like under the bed.
“I don’t know how it got under there. Guess maybe I was giving it to you a little too rough. We must’ve really been going at it. I can’t-“
“Eddie! Just unlock it, please.” What the fuck is he doing?!
“Right, sorry.” He gently grabs my wrists and frees me of that horrible pain. I immediately turn around and grip each wrist in each hand and massage them.
“Fuck, that’s horrible. Remind me to never do anything to get arrested.” Eddie sits down next to me, still completely naked as well.
“I’m so sorry, honey.” He wraps both arms around me and kissing my temple, cheek, lips, anywhere he can reach. I can tell he feels bad.
I look over to him with a smile small. Grabbing his jaw with one hand, “It’s okay. Wasn’t really your fault. I guess we really were going at it.” I say giggling.
“Yeah we were!” Eddie says with the biggest smile on his face before grabbing my cheeks and kissing me.
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verslxt · 2 years ago
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sick days ~ r. suna
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yo yo yo! it’s me again 🤪. anyways…i’ll probably do a poll for each fic i write, probably. unless i have an idea and i already have a character for it.
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rintarou suna ~ inarizaki 3rd year, been dating y/n since 1st year, won prom king with her a few days ago. middle blocker in volleyball
y/n ojiro ~ arans little sister, dating suna since 1st year. ecstatic that she won prom queen because she doesn’t think she’s that pretty. currently sick in her bed
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you laid back down after arans daily facetime. you got sick like sick sick. coughing, throwing up, and a fever of 103.5°
you saw a text pop up from suna
baby daddy 🥰
baby where are you?
you typed back
sick
~sunas pov~
baby momma 😍
sick
“how did she get sick so soon” atsumu looked over my shoulder at me and y/n’s texts
“man i don’t know” i said grabbing my bag. “make up and excuse for me! tell them i got sick with y/n”
i grabbed my keys and walked out. i got to my car and started it. while i waited for it to warm up i made a group
tsumu 😐, onigiri lover 😋, baby momma 😍, toshi
yo make up excuses for me. i’m going to y/n’s house
~y/n’s pov~
you felt your phone ding
dumbass 😶, baby daddy 🥰, onigiri lover 😐, toshi 🥱
baby daddy 🥰
make up excuses for me. i’m going to y/n’s house
i typed back
rin you really don’t have to
baby daddy 🥰
yes i do
a few minutes later you saw a slouched over 6’1 boy enter your room
“hi baby”
“tired”
“same”
you opened your arms and he took off his shirt and layer over top of you.
“if i run out of the room will you hold my hair while i throw up?”.
“baby.”
“yes”
“of course i would”
~time skip~
“y/n dear-“
your mom opened the door to see you and suna cuddled up together. she couldn’t help by think of her and your dad at that age
that’s when you woke up
“hi mommy”
“hi baby. you feeling any better”
“yea, but i may still need tomorrow of”
“okay, i got you a little something”
you sat up straight as your mom took out a book
“you’ve been wanting this book for a while now. and your grades are outstandingly good”
she placed the book ‘a girl in pieces’ in your lap
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the next day you woke up to suna coughing. and coughing hard at that.
“baby are you okay?” you asked rubbing his back
“yea, i think i just caught whatever you did”
“you want anything?”
“a shower”
you got up and started the shower for him, he wrapped his arms around your waist.
“can you text the group chat”
“yea”
suna kissed your temple and took off the sweatshirt you gave him. it always amazed you seeing his abs.
you got out of your bathroom and grabbed your phone
personal chef 🫶🏽
do need to text sunas mom and tell her you and suna got sick
future motha in law ❤️
did you and rin get sick? do i need to call the school?
you typed back
my child 😶
me and rin are now sick, sunas mom already knows
future dautha in law ❤️
me and rinnie are sick, but we’re getting over it slowly but surely. he is in the shower currently, i’m going to make him some breakfast
the better suna 🤪
gurl did my brother get himself sick
the better ojiro 🤪
lmao yep
you went downstairs and went into your kitchen
“hey alexa play maneater”
“playing maneater and similar songs”
“take it back, take it back”
you smiled as you grabbed out a pan. that’s when you felt two hands snake around your waist
“yes rinnie”
“a maneater kinda mood i see i see”
you giggled at sunas comment
“hey you have a notification on your phone”
“oh tell me who it is”
“the better suna”
“omg rin that’s your sister”
you opened your phone suna hunched over his head in the crook of your neck
the better suna 🤪
this boy is OBSESSED with you gurl
“she’s not wrong. first thing she’s ever been right about”
you laughed as suna kissed you
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sorry, this is literally so bad!!! but i’ve been working on it all week. anyways you guys prob don't know what the contact names are, so i'm just gunna give you a run down of them
personal chef-momma ojiro
future motha in law ❤️-momma suna
the better suna 🤪-reiko suna
baby daddy-suna
baby momma, my child, the better ojiro, future daugha in law-y/n
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smloshie · 1 year ago
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Turning Page - a Simon Bootles x Reader
Part 1 - 1729
Epilogue
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Word count: 2095
Foreword: Here it is; the epilogue. (to part one that is ;)) Thank you so much to those of you who supported me. I havent written a multi-part fanfic since I was in middle school, so this was really cool and an awesome way to get my brain active! I think that if Damien or anyone from Smosh ever read this I'd be mortified lol so I hope this just stays between us ! Also, I will be uploading all of the chapters to Wattpad if anyone prefers to read their fanfiction there. Just search for it, it's the only Simon Bootles fanfic there is lmao
Anyways, enjoy the final addition to part one!
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I sat on the lip of my bedroom’s main window pane, looking out at the lush forest that grew behind my family’s estate. While the trees are beautiful, they are intertwined with nothing but danger. 
I knew that now, thanks to Simon.
Before I’d met him, the sunset was nothing more than a perfect way to end my day. Watercolor clouds kissing faintly painted stars, and a moon that seemed to rise from the earth’s soil. Now, I would go through life recognizing that shade of purple as that of a heart I’d miss every day. That is, unless I had the privilege of him coming home to me every night. I knew that would never happen, though.
I squinted as I looked at the trees, maybe I would see red eyes staring back at me. I would scream. Simon would feel a disturbance in his soul, as it was now intertwined with mine. He would rush back to be at my side and vow to protect me at all costs. Alas, nothing. 
Instead I saw attendants moving dining tables out onto the grass outside. Some were arranging candles, some were adjusting centerpieces. Garrison stood off to the side with my father, monitoring the placement of everything for his wedding. He looked like a hawk on the brink of snapping at his prey. One mistake on his big day, and they’d be jobless for the rest of their lives.
I heard a knock on my bedroom door. This was the third attendant tonight to ask me to come downstairs. I didn’t want to, unless Simon would be there. Unfortunately, none of us had heard from him in months, so we assumed he wouldn’t be coming. In all honesty, I wasn’t exactly incentivised to attend.
“(Y/N), I’m not sending another serf up to grab you!” I heard my mother say, sternly. I got up from my seat in the window, hiked my long dress up past my ankles with a huff, and stomped to the door. I opened it to see her standing there; she looked surprised that I had answered so suddenly.
“I’m not coming.” I said, bluntly.
“You’re dressed, your makeup is done, your hair is acceptable- What could you possibly be hiding from up here?!” she asked.
“You wouldn’t understand.” I muttered. I might have sounded immature, but it was true nonetheless. I walked away from her and slumped back onto my spot in the window with a frown. Maybe some of the guests would assume I was the ghost of a woman mourning her lost love, and leave the wedding out of fear. I was one heart attack away from taking that form anyway.
My mother followed into the room after me, slamming the door behind her. I avoided eye contact at all costs.
“What wouldn’t I understand? Tell me, what is so important for you to be stressing over on a wedding day that’s not even yours?” She demanded.
“Because it’s not even mine!” I shrieked. She broke down the barrier protecting my psyche. She was stunned at the way my voice cracked.
“Is that what you wanted to hear? What you’ve longed for since the day I was born? I’m dressed, my makeup is done, my hair is perfect, and I’m not getting married to the man I love. Not today- not ever! He left me. I’m alone. I’m going to die alone and I’ll never see him again! ” I screamed in one breath. I gasped for air, huffing and puffing with tears threatening to spill over. I hadn’t had a true outburst like that in months- not since the night he and I met.
I looked down at the ground, ashamed that I had let it all out. My mother said nothing for a while, until I heard her timid voice ask the question I had dreaded answering.
“Who?”
“Simon.” I answered.
“Simon Bootles? Garrison’s friend? That Simon?”
“Obviously.” I rolled my still tear-filled eyes.
She took my hands in hers.
“And he had… reciprocated these feelings?” She asked.
“Actually, I believe it was him who initiated.” I explained under my breath.
“Are you actively being courted by him?”
“No, I haven’t heard from him since he left.”
She paused.
“Why haven’t you told us?”
“I was afraid… I didn’t know if Garrison would get angry, I thought I would be ridiculed, I thought everyone would think I wasn’t good enough for him-”
“Well your brother managed to nab Alice.” She whispered, but I heard it. I chuckled.
“And there was something about the secrecy of our relationship that fueled the fire, in a way. Like sneaking around had somehow amplified the speed at which our love for each other grew.” 
“Well, sharing a secret can bring two souls closer together.” My mother sighed, sitting next to me on the window and brushing my misplaced hairs behind my ear.
“You say that like you know.” I scoffed. Her silence that followed spoke volumes.
“Wait, is that how you and father fell in love?” More silence, but she gave me a look that I was getting colder.
“So… not him? There was someone else?”
“His name was Abraham. I met him at a dance held in a forest at the age of fourteen. We, much like you and Simon I assume, kept our love a secret from my family. Almost every night, he whisk me off into the trees and we would-” she cleared her throat, “spend time together.”
Disgusting.
“When my father found out, boy- he flew into a proper rage. He said I was raking our family name and status through the mud by falling in love with a boy of such low rank. We sold our estate and moved our lives hours away. Though somehow, Abraham found me. He came to my window just to see me, every night. That is, until I was arranged to marry your father. I never saw him again after that. Though, I remember when I was pregnant with you, your father and I entered into a screaming match and I fled in the woods behind our house. I sat on a fallen down tree and cried, hoping Abe would hear me and save me. But, he never came. I eventually got over whatever it was your father and I fought about and returned home.” I watched her wipe her tears from her cheeks.
“I- I had no idea, mother. I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. I haven’t thought about him in years. If anything, you’ve reminded me of how adventurous love can be once you find the right person. Don’t get me wrong, I love your father. But, if my father had let me marry Abraham, I would have.”
“I’m happy that you understand.” I said. She hummed in affirmation, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and pulling me in close. I missed my mother’s embrace more than I realized. I felt my eyes burn like I was about to cry again. After a moment, she let go of me and stood up.
“I need to assist Alice and make sure everything is ready. Before I go, can I give you a word of advice?” She asked.
“Of course.” I said.
“Next time you see Simon, don’t let him leave until he’s put a ring on your finger.” I giggled at the thought.
“That was my plan,” I said, “Can you not tell anyone about what I told you? I want to tell everyone about us when he’s here with me- if he ever comes back, that is. Otherwise, they’ll just think I’m pathetic.”
“You have my word.” she said. She opened my door, and smiled at me before leaving.
I internalized everything she said to me. A handsome stranger. A love that was meant to be. A secret that wasn’t meant to be kept. Maybe my mother and I were more alike than I thought… 
All of a sudden, my thoughts were interrupted by a tapping sound behind me. I thought maybe my mind had been playing tricks on me, until I heard it again.
Would it be wise of me to turn around? If I did, would I be met with the monster who had been poisoning my mind, or the man who held the antidote on his lips? Of course, how would Simon even get up to my second-story window in the first place? So it must be something supernatural, like a demon.
Against my better judgment, I spun around with my eyes squeezed shut. Slowly opening them, I realized there was no demon, nor man, in my window at all. In fact, upon closer inspection, there was an envelope wedged into my window’s grilles.
How did it get there? Had it been there the whole time? Or had fate summoned enough strength to have the wind blow it my way?
I eagerly released the letter from its prison. It was addressed to me, with my full name written on it. I scanned it, front and back, for any signs of who it was from. The only clue I had was a purple seal on the back, keeping the letter shut. The wax was embedded with what looked like a family crest, but I couldn’t quite make out the shape. It looked vaguely like a flame, but it was incredibly amorphous. I carefully opened the envelope, being careful not to bend the seal, and extracted the paper inside of it. All signs pointed to it being from Simon, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up. I took a deep breath, and began to read it.
My dearest, (Y/N),
By the time you’ve received this note, I’ll have already returned to my own estate. Luckily, for the both of us, I don’t think this is the last time we’ll ever see each other. I hope you believe me when I say that I will do whatever it takes to make sure that we will end with our arms around each other once more, even if I have to take fate in my own hands.
When I first saw your face, I didn’t know what to think that evening. My smile faded because I couldn’t believe that someone as beautiful as you was in the same room as me. I thought to myself, “Has a creature like this always existed, and this is the first time I’m seeing it, or had I trained my mind to ignore anything that I perceived to be out of heart’s reach, like a comet? But how could that be- if you were meant to live amongst the stars, what were you doing here on earth?” I assumed you must have been a goddess sent from Heaven itself, meant to lay new gravel and change the course that my life was heading down.
Now, some may try to simplify what I felt for you and call it love at first sight. However, I feel that isn’t a fair description at all. It was feeling love for the first time. When I made you run away that night, I made a vow to myself that if I had ever hurt you again, that would be the last vow I’d ever make, for I would never deserve to be wed to you.
I laid awake that night in the guest suite just praying that you would realize how much I longed to feel your touch. Though, I really didn’t have to wait long at all. You soon let me into your world the next day, by allowing me to approach you in the library. That’s when I knew the love I had felt the evening prior wasn’t fleeting. It wasn’t misplaced. It wasn’t naïve. 
It was true.
I love you, (Y/N).
If you didn’t hear me say it before I left, I still said it. I said ‘I love you’ under my breath nearly every time that our eyes met. Which, for half a week, was a surprisingly high number of times.
Our time together may have been short, but you and I will be infinite.
Always and forever yours,
Simon Bootles
Those last words rang throughout my mind and body. ‘Our time together may have been short, but you and I will be infinite.’ I wiped a tear away from my lashes, and pressed the purple wax seal to my lips wishing it was his skin. 
I knew I would see Simon again. Whether in this life or the next, nothing would keep us apart forever.
He and I will be infinite.
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abey-baby-apologist · 2 years ago
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clone high final episode spoilers below! (9 n 10)
holy fuck im so happy. even though im super annoyed how they keep throwing a bunch of really good ideas for relationships and plot in the trash- im just so happy with what we got. 
OK FIRST EPISODE 9??? THE ANIMATION WAS SO FUCKING GOOD AND I HAD TO PAUSE BECAUSE WHEN WESLEY WAS FLAILING IN THE SEA, IT WAS DAMN smooth and pleasant to watch, as morbid as it sounds lol. that whole scene with the comic-esque vibe was so so pleasing. 
and that whole episode was super like, sad but funny. i literally stood up and yelled when Mr. B was getting near the edge. like i probably woke up every single one of my neighbors in like.. a 50 mile radius it was that bad im so fucking annoying about this show. 
BUT THEN SCUDS SAVED HIM AND I WAS SO HAPPY, LIKE THEYRE LITERALLY AN OLD COUPLE, AND LITERALLY THEY’RE FATHERS TO THEIR CLONE KIDS AND THEYRE ALL SUCH A BIG HAPPY FAMILY AND AUGHHHH im gonna draw family stuff with them so bad. I WISH THESE EPISODES CAME OUT BEFORE FATHERS DAY IT WOULD’VE BEEN PERFECT. 
ok, episode 10 i have to take a deep breath with. i am VERY happy. and idk if it was because the bar was so low, or if it was because i was so anxious i was vomiting everywhere because i needed content so bad, but i am overjoyed. 
THE ABETOPH CONTENT WE GOT WAS SO GOOD. WE HAVE LIKE... 3 NEW CUTE PHOTOS OF THEM HANGING OUT, AND LIKE A BUNCH OF MOMENTS OF ABE CARRYING TOPHER ON HIS BACK. was it because he was being tophers lackey? fine, sure, whatever. BUT AFTER THAT WHEN JFK BROKE TOPHERS PHONE IT WAS OVER (im upset it wasnt developed on further because people who didnt watch it in real time like us will surely be fine. so fuck you.) 
Also, ABE AND JFKS FREINDSHIP HOLUYDBIUJEWNFJKNF oh my god not to be autistic but i was stimming so fucking hard WHEN THEY HUGGED, I WAS LIKE YES FINALLY. FINALLLLLYYY!!! theyre my sweet boys and THAT WHOLE FRIEND GROUP HAS ME IN TEARS. LIKE abe and Confucius are already bros, as we see them playing in the school yard, and JFK and Confucius are already bros from the sleepover episode, but NOW JFK AND ABE ARE BROS. FUCK. YEAH. oh and tophers there too. i like how they treat topher tbh. like hes just there until he says something out of pocket and they’re just like stfu. 
but with the girls friend group.. oof. i honestly loved them so much, especially with cleo, but NOW ITS FUCKED. and its not even joans fault tbh. like when i was watching the scene where frida dropped joan i was like “damn” but then, JOAN MENTIONS HOW SHE HELPED EVERYONE BEFORE AND I WAS LIKE “DAYYYYYYUUMMMM UR RIGHT” so now im conflicted. But again like??? bruh i would choose cleo too tbh lmao.
Also, i’m glad clone college isn’t real. because jfk mentions about taking shelly to .. biology? which i think is a only 1st year class. and in the original clone high everyone is like “omg u hit puberty over summer” Which i feel is typically something thats potrayed in media AFTER middle school. but i could be wrong so, idk. just really glad they didn’t do the clone college bc i hate change. also theyre 16 lmao. OR MAYBE THEY WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT... in the future when highschools done?? IDK. IDC.
anyway. im scared for joans friend group and i fucking love joan, and i am in love with abe, toph, jfk, and Confucius’s little bromances and augh. im so happy. and THE CLIFF HANGER WASN’T TERRIBLE ALSO, IN MY OPNINON. 
im just glad joanabe wasn’t endgame. i mean, i would be pretty happy because im a sucker for childhood friends to lovers but also NOOOOOO joan deserves better. so. yeah 10/10 
if you read this far, holy crap, im proud of you, and ily 
that is my review on the finale so i’ll be making so much content now that im not on the brink of collapsing everytime i think of clone high. like trust me im gonna try and stretch out this fixation for as long as i can. though im probably gonna draw a surplus of abe and jfk art bc they were my fav in 2020
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princessmaybank · 7 months ago
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Hi! Congratulations on 1.5!!! sent something else for the celebration already but saw you post about warning a “💌 New Message”. I know you mentioned for us to state which character we would like it from but honestly I pretty much like them all the same (except I do like Pope just a little bit more) so either from Pope, or if you think I would for better with sometime else then I would definitely love that! (Also preferably the character being my established significant other (so like at least being together for like 6 ish months)). And even though I’m a really boring person, here it goes haha. I’m pretty shy and introverted when first meeting someone (and in public) but once I get to know and become closer to someone I am more extroverted around them, and more relaxed and carefree. I would describe myself as a very kind, honest, caring, and overall good person. I would also say I’m a romantic and love all that stuff that some people find cheesy. I unfortunately didn’t get the stereotypical high school love and have only had 2 “romances” (a few “dates” (I put in quotes because yes they were dates but no effort was made and were nothing like how I imagined/imagine dates should be) and kissed/made out but then said they didn’t want anything serious). I love both cats and dogs but after we put down our last dog a few years ago we (my family and I) decided just to have our cats (as my mom is getting older and didn’t want to deal with potty training and taking a dog on walks, especially when I am at college). I LOVE music I am listening to music pretty much all the time, exceptions being when I am working/ doing school stuff that I have to have my entire focus on (or obvious things like at a restaurant with family or friends, dr appointment, etc) although once I am sitting in the chair at the dentist after talking to the hygienist, I have it in my chart that I put my headphones in because I hate loud noises the noise, (and the taste, smells, noise all put together makes me freak out). I said I hate loud noises, however I love fireworks and concerts (I put earplugs in lmao). I am a basic white girl with most of my music taste (sue me okay!) and love Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Sabrina Carpenter, Niall Horan, Louis Tomlinson, Halsey, Kelsea Ballerini, the glee cast seasons 1-3💀, 5 seconds of summer, one direction, however I do also love Evanescence and Halestorm. In middle and high school I was in band (played the clarinet) and choir for a few years but did not continue when teachers left and i didn’t get much joy from it anymore, but I still sing along to music I listen to. I am NOT into sports/don’t watch/play but when I was younger I was really interested in gymnastics and did it for four years until the price increased and I had to quit. However I love “swimming” (going in the water and relaxing/ moving around, not swimming laps or anything like that). This was all over the place and I feel like this was probably way too many details you don’t need/don’t help you but also possibly not enough info to write a letter :/ But anyways, hopefully it is good enough you can write something from it! Thank you and once again congratulations!!!
Thank you babe ❤️ I guess I'm a post office now because have a letter here from Pope for you! 😂
Hello Beautiful,
It's our 1 year anniversary and I am extremely sorry for not being able to be with you for it. I miss you so much and I can't wait to see you again. I think about you every day, all day long. Not a day goes by where you and your lovely smile don't cross my mind.
I know I told you I'd be away for a few more months but I have something to tell you. I'll be back to visit in a few weeks honey!
You've probably already seen them by now in the envelope, but in case you haven't looked, I got you a little something. I know how much you love Niall Horan, and I saw that he was on tour, so I made a few ends meet and I got us some tickets for his show near us. I'll be visiting that week. Can't wait to see my beautiful baby.
P.S. I know it's not as good as the tickets but I also sent a picture of me. I Love You.
Love,
Pope <3
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tadpolesonalgae · 9 months ago
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it's ok haha it might be because i'm a really emotional person in general so i cry over pretty much anything (just the other day i went to my mom crying to show a cute cat video and she was like "???" 😭)
oh i also wanted to say i really like your dark fics!! i tried to pick up a few dark romance books before but most of them quickly turned to hate-reading lmao and it's really weird because i usually don't have any problems with consuming dark content?? i think my problem with these books is that authors are tend to (over)romanticize almost everything (and they always have the same boring plot)
your dark fics are a godsend 🙏🏻 the desk pet series and the one with ghost azriel are my favorites
i'm really into visual novel games these days, especially the ones with romance and horror (yes. this girl is a yandere enjoyer 😭 it's been my guilty pleasure since middle school) my silly little insane fictional bfs and your fics are my motivation to write my own fics 🫶🏻
—🫧 (leaving this here so i can come back later with you knowing it's me hehe)
Awww that’s so sweet 😭 I haven’t met many people in my life who are that comfortable with their emotions! (I think I just told you that I’m happy you cry a lot??? I don’t mean it that way, I just mean I’m glad you haven’t been wrapped up in the whole ‘it’s bad to show negative emotion’ ideology 😭🫣)
‘oh i also wanted to say i really like your dark fics!!’
Thank you so much! I’m so flattered!! 😳🧡💛
I get what you mean with the kind of formulaic style, except I’m experiencing it with contemporary romance at the moment? I think I read too much of it all at once so now I’ve switched genres to something I find more interesting and it’s been super enjoyable branching out and reading different material than usual!! I think every now and then I’ll enjoy a contemporary romance book but I just can’t read them as frequently before!
‘i think my problem with these books is that authors are tend to (over)romanticize almost everything’
I can see how in dark romance it would be a fine line to walk because you definitely don’t want to actually romanticise that sort of thing in real life? It’s always important to keep reality and fantasy separate in these situations, the fun comes from it being fictional and contained within your own mind where you’re in control of the situation so I get where the problem is :)
‘your dark fics are a godsend 🙏🏻 the desk pet series and the one with ghost azriel are my favorites’
Ahhhh thank you so much!!! I really enjoyed writing the atmosphere for the ghost Azriel one and I feel it’s a bit spookier than the stuff I usually write so I’m so happy you enjoyed that little change! And the desk pet series is another one that’s very enjoyable! I think I prefer play-mate to desk pet overall, but I’m looking forward to adding another part to it after Two-Faced! 🧡💛
‘i'm really into visual novel games these days, especially the ones with romance and horror’
Wow I’ve never even heard of visual novel games? Video games, and graphic novels, sure, but visual novel games sound interesting?? I’d love to know more about what format they’re presented in! (I’ll probably have a nose at them later this evening)
‘my silly little insane fictional bfs and your fics are my motivation to write my own fics 🫶🏻’
🫣😭🫂🫂🫂 I hope you get to enjoy writing your own fics, it’s such a high compliment to receive thank you so much 😳 I’m just so happy you enjoy my fics enough to want to write your own 😭🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂
‘—🫧 (leaving this here so i can come back later with you knowing it's me hehe)’
I’ll look forward to seeing you in my inbox again sometime, then!! 🧡💛
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