#I feel like I need a shower now

[laspocelliere]

Day Five: Barbarous

In the cold, and the darkness, Zenos waited.

The Ascian had promised him the world, singing honeyed tunes of destruction and death, where retribution and blood rained down like starshowers. Dull, and distasteful, but holding a glimmer of potential nonetheless, and one that Zenos tolerated to its barest extent. Each piece of this scheme shone pale and dull, scuffed against the mortal mechanisms that were beneath his anger, or even his notice.

Entombed in the steel spires of Garlemald’s fallen palace, Zenos sat, chin in hand, staring into the darkness with a blank, unseeing gaze that was unchanging as whenever he looked upon any other living or inanimate object beneath his notice. Man, woman, child, flea; they all measured to the same barbaric worth before his impassive gaze. Even the Ascian’s plan held only singular goal, channelled towards singular, unparalleled bliss.

She was all that mattered.

Absently, the disgraced prince ran one lazy finger along the edge of the throne he occupied, feeling along the edges as though it were a blade. Somewhere, out in the cold, she was close. Somewhere, her weight, real and warm and breathing with unfiltered life was fracturing the ice of Garlemald, calling him to her. Her saviour complex had brought her ever closer to him, circling him like an animal seeking prey. Soon, tantalisingly soon, he would face her again, once more bringing forth that base desire of hers to hunt, kill, and destroy.

He’d seen it once, in those armageddon eyes of hers, piercing deep into his own as the blade had slid across his throat, warm blood filling his mouth until he knew naught but silence.

He’d kept it burned into the backs of his eyelids, as he’d traversed the star, returning himself to life, and limb, and that same, unwavering desire to once more feel that rush in his veins.

Only she had ever managed to provoke it.

Only she was worth the trouble of dealing with maggots. 

He would dirty his hands however she wished, if only for the chance to face that exquisite, beautiful rage of hers again.

He would understand her, this time. He would know his mortal enemy, his dearest and most beloved, inside and out, by the time they faced each other on the battlefield again. This, the Ascian had assured him, would be possible with very little effort. The puppeteer’s brazen disregard for his dear friend’s abilities irked him – it was, after all, a reflection of his own skills then, that she had once bested him – but irked him as a fly irks a wolf. Easily batted away, and beneath most notice.

What mattered was her. Only her.

Absently, Zenos ran his fingertips idly over the smooth arm of the throne, thick as bone and nowhere near as satisfying to grasp. It was nowhere near what he needed, which was to have her under his hands once more, violent and snarling, teeth bared and that steady pulse nearly a beacon against her throat, one nearly asking him to reach out and take from her everything that he could have ever wanted. 

And wasn’t that an intriguing thought to follow.

An indulgence, then. One born of thoughts barely birthed, and only recently attended to as his waiting for her grew weary. 

His hands, circled around those slender, bird-boned wrists of hers, tightening to find the exact pressure point where they snapped. His nails, scraping curled rivets into the milky, unblemished skin of her thighs. His fingers, fitting along the hollows between her ribs, pressing in and in and in until he could find the very core of her. He found no satisfaction in the base savagery of a kiss, but he thought that maybe tasting the very marrow from her splintered ribs could come nearly as close.

Alone and unfettered, Zenos’ breath quickened, just enough to spark the slightest flicker of amusement in his breast. 

Yes, he mused, more satisfied at a hypothesis found correct more than the banal pleasure he found in his fantasies. Yes, of course.

Only her.

The Ascian would make it so, delivering her to him on a golden pedestal, and Zenos relished the anticipation of the moment, even as he betrayed nothing but indifferent calm.

He needed to know her, to consume her, in every definition of the word. He would split apart her lovely skull, press his fingertips behind those blazing eyes of her and find where the colour came from, watch it leak from her irises as he sought out the light behind them, that haunting brightness that followed him even in death. He would unspool her veins from her severed throat, as like gossamer scarlet spider webs dancing across his palms as he found the map of her very being, unravelled it for him, and him alone.

Perhaps, he mused as a value afterthought, more bestial – carnal – pleasures would be satisfied before the more ethereal. It would depend, rather, on his whims in the moment, and where their moment of ecstasy brought them.

And would you welcome it, my dearest companion? Or will you gift me the look of fear that I so covet to see fall deadened in your gaze?

Clicking his tongue in disdain, Zenos straightened in his seat, shifting position to lean on his opposite elbow. The small movement jarred him out of fantasy, and firmly back into practicalities. 

She wouldn’t show fear. Never her. Fear was for base animals. Barbaric, savage creatures.

They alone, destined to meet in celestial bliss, rose above that banality.

And how he craved it. The sweet release of carnage and death that only his closest friend could offer him.

“Soon,” Zenos found himself muttering to himself lowly, his voice haunting an echo in the empty, cavernous great hall. “Soon, we will be reunited.”

“And at last, you will understand.”

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Wanted to write something cute and soft for project endorphins. Writing absolute filth instead.

[theythemmer]

phinktober day 11: ur fav AU

i dont rlly do AUs so i just drew them how i wish they would dress xo

(dan’s tats r carnations and snowdrops and phil’s r roses and honeysuckle. for no reason 🤗)

ALSO bonus version w makeup bc i couldn’t pick <3

[dreamtuna]

Showering Together

Attack on Titan - Levi x Reader || smut, well you’ll have to imagine some of it, fem!Reader

Not very Christmassy, but consider this a present to y'all nonetheless.

Levi loved showering with you. The first time he suggested it you were hardly surprised but you were a little apprehensive. Despite him having seen your body many times by this point, showering together felt like a whole different kind of intimacy, one you hadn’t really explored many times in past relationships. But the way his eyes lit up when you agreed quickly soothed your nerves.

His gentle gaze on you as you undressed together, insisting on helping you with the buttons on your blouse in a way that left his fingers trailing against your bare skin, it was all so hypnotising. He pulled you in under the stream of water, checking if the temperature was okay for you, checking you were comfortable doing this with him. His softness in the way he handled you was driving you wild with desire. A burning affection for him engulfed your core.

Things only heated up further as he manoeuvred behind you, close enough to feel his warmth against your skin. Soapy hands worked their way over your back, your shoulders, down your arms, lathering up your skin underneath expert fingers. His lips came in to kiss your ear and you found yourself sinking back into his love.

Those expert fingers worked their way round to your stomach and then ever so slowly upwards, checking your reaction every step of the way before finally cupping your breasts. You could feel his desire twitch against your body. His heat hung heavy against your ass. You didn’t even mean to grind against him, but as his hands fondled your breasts, tugging gently at your nipples the way he knew you liked until you gasped and moaned for him, well, you just couldn’t help but rub back against him. Levi’s soft gasps were everything.

He continued like this for a while, his hands working rougher and rougher as your self control melted for him and you threw your head back onto his shoulder, until finally he released you. You whined at the loss of contact. The fire between your legs was unbearable. You needed his touch. You needed him.

“Shh, shh, my pretty girl,” he told you, hand working its way under your thigh to lift your leg for him. “You’ll have plenty to make noise about in a second.”

Levi loved showering with you. He loved the smell of your clean hair. He loved the softness of your skin. And most of all he loved the pure bliss on your face as he cleaned up the mess he made of you in there.

[disposal-blueeee]

VARGASTOBER - day 28 : fantasy

[pansyfemme]

i have been a ball of depression lately as well as my physical health worsening pretty severly this past week due to stress and so my friends have been. trying so hard to get me to get out and do things and its very sweet but i feel bad because the whole time i’m just a total mess

[vaguely-concerned]

every time rye hears lucanis really laugh he has such a mortifying '*sick and harrowed with longing to the very depths of his soul* alright :)' moment. I just got the banter where taash talks about stuff their mother told them about crows as a kid and it was a 10 on the soul quaking richter scale event

[dykephan]

the way phil bruises like a peach and dan has a thing for bruises. sigh

[vegaseatsass]

Reality tv is so fucking dangerous for me because my brain still whirs as if I'm watching fictional characters but I'm NOT and I should NOT be blorbofying or armchair diagnosing these irl human beings, it's simply safer for me to never ever engage. Tl;dr my god the exes on His Man 3 have eaten my mind, I can't stop thinking about them. I won't share REAL PERSON HEADCANONS (basically: who pings as neuroatypical) but I went from thinking Myeongkyun was the most hilarious entertaining television figure I'd seen in years to being really truly gutted for him and his like, slow struggling emotional processing which makes him sooooo frustratingly opaque even though he is trying, and his fuckboy affect which is so deceptive for how confusingly deeply (but just. sloooooowly) he actually feels. Youngjoon has been my favorite contestant this entire time (well, Youngjoon and Seungjin but let's not get me started on how it feels to watch Seungjin go untreasured episode after episode) and Hanmin jumped way up there in episodes 7 and 8 too because who knew he was the absolute kindest and most supportive and emotionally intelligent person in that entire house, I'm rooting SO HARD for him and Youngjoon I think they're such a crazy good match for each other augh. So the thing I find so compelling about Myeongkyun and Youngjoon's conflict is that it's really easy for me to understand where both of them were coming from; as absolutely maddening as it is to imagine being in Youngjoon's shoes and trying with so much hyperverbal self-awareness to reach some kind of clarity and just being hit in the face again and again with Myeongkyun's blase opaqueness, I really DO think they were both trying super hard and in good faith in that exhausting conversation! It understandably didn't FEEL that way to Youngjoon, as Myeongkyun led him in circle after circle, but I'm seriously like unhinged with how much I feel for Myeongkyun rn and his visible overwhelm. When Youngjoon was about to leave and tell Myeongkyun to figure things out on his own and Myeongkyun told him it's actually easier for him !!! to sort through his feelings with him there !!!! that's such an admittance, he absolutely was trying that whole time but what comes out of his mouth is sooooooooo not intelligible and thus as infuriating as humanly possible for Youngjoon, this incredibly verbal, emotionally analytic overthinker. They're such a bad match lmao and it's so so sad that Myeongkyun just assumed their relationship was moving as slowly as his feelings do and not that he was fully ghosted dklfjslkdfja I can just see BOTH THEIR SIDES I'm almost always on the side of the person who is like "how was I supposed to know what you ghosting me meant? I kept contacting you because I just thought you were busy!" vs. the ghoster who is all ugh dude why couldn't you read the room? but if Myeongkyun has always been like this - answering a direct question with "Maybe I'm ENTJ!" or "I don't want to tell you" or munch munch munching and "mmm"-ing and blinking and never ever answering what he was actually asked - it's pretty easy to understand why Youngjoon would assume this is a guy who neither cares about nor requires direct communication of any kind.

Lol sorry I've never posted into this tag before and this is a super incoherent blur of feelings before I go offline for the next two days but I just have to get it out of my system because I don't think I've ever had a reality show change my perception of somebody as much as Myeongkyun just like. Visibly hanging on by a thread while saying all the absolute wrong things in his stupid cool guy voice. and then breaking down as soon as he was alone. did. "Dating Minseon is... a possibility" went from sounding like a half-assed non-commitment to me, to Myeongkyun very seriously working through his feelings at his regular slow slow speed, and I'm fully rooting for them as well atp.

I wish this season had more friendship and less shady secret missions because everyone is so miserable... including me, who is sitting here typing nonsense instead of posting about my safely fictional characters.

[deus-ex-mona]

something something guys who think of the backs of the girls they love

and girls who pinch the cheeks of the guys they love

[thresholdbb]

The Doctor telling Tom his 1969 Camero has “medieval safety constraints” like they aren’t thrown out of their seats on the bridge every five minutes

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

i hate doing laundry ough it's The Worst

[moregraceful]

u know it really does sometimes get like oh i should delete my blog, but then a voice in my head who sounds suspiciously like my therapist from last winter who i didn't like, says ah, i see you are thinking of nuking your internet presence and isolating yourself from the things and people you love! let's review: 1. did you drink water in the past two hours? 2. did you eat protein or fiber today? 3. when was the last time you showered?

and you guys are not going to believe it, but solving 1-3 of those problems does give me the will to go on

[thespacesay]

brought to you by me hosting a friend for two days who grew up in the same cultural region, and tbh will not be invited again.

[youredyingthatsallthereis]

in some very good personal news though my orchids are doing amazing and one of them is going to flower VERY soon and the other is not far behind!!! i also finally repotted my smaller monstera and he is looking very happy :3

[nobodybetterlookatme]

Update 3: drove the asshole home bc I was so sure he was fr gonna die if he drove himself lmao. Poor dude looked so miserable, like bro was either holding back while we were working or he got worse the second he was able to relax, bc there wasn't a single moment of silence the whole drive back, dude was just curled up in the passenger’s seat shivering and being so fucking symptomatic. Like he was doing that thing where you basically cough all of the air out of your lungs then doing that rattly little inhale and then repeating, like it was Not Good 😬 0/10, hated being there to experience that in person, I was horrified, I want all of that to stay in audio recordings where it can't hurt me lmao. And he wasn’t sneezing a ton, but when he did, he stifled them until I told him to quit it bc the last thing he needs is a fucking ear infection on top of whatever the hell is already wrong with him, and even when he stopped, he was so congested that they sounded kinda stifled anyway 😭 like it's all objectively hot and I would've loved it had I just read it and not experienced it first hand, but unfortunately I'm a massive germaphobe and had to sit three feet away from this guy all damn day. So I bleached the hell out of my car and scrubbed myself down in the shower three times and I still don't feel like anything is clean enough, but I'm tired so it's gonna have to do for now lmao