#I feel guilty sleeping

[lovefield-s]

I always forget about the cold water trick.

[thegradus2]

“Surely not…. It’s been 15 years… and anyone would have stopped before getting disowned, noone would lack *that* amount of care for themself”

And then basen doesn’t stop thinking about it for a week

[paunchsalazar]

they were sleeping together at this point

[essektheylyss]

My thing about Veth potentially venturing into polyamory is that I do think everyone involved would be perfectly fine with it and happy to help her experiment, and I think that no matter how they do it, it would not fix her. This isn't to say that she wouldn't get any benefit out of trying! It's just to say that it's not a solution to her actual problem, because I genuinely don't think the problem is that she's lacking any one thing that would make her life complete.

Fundamentally, I think Veth struggles with the idea that there will come a point at which she has to settle. Not in a bad way, just in the sense that she is one person with one life and she will have to live within those bounds. Because the thing is, I don't really think her issue ends at struggling to "have it all"; to an extent she does! She is a good parent, even if her kid is a little rebellious; her marriage is supportive (and has fun sex); she gets to go off to save the world with Yeza's blessing on occasion, when the world needs saving. She doesn't have all of these things all the time, but... that's not really a flaw, that's just a fact of life.

But she started out her adult life settling to an extent—even if she loved Yeza and loved being Luc's mom, she did the safe thing that was expected of her. The goblin attack and everything that transpired after shoved her out of that life, but in retrospect, to an extent it likely feels that that pushed her to find something more that she wouldn't have had otherwise. Being pushed to her limit under the worst conditions made her better, stronger, braver, and at the end of it she found that she could have both her original life and much of her new life—so why wouldn't she then wonder if further experiences of that ilk could do the same?

Crucially, she has not actually run up against a hard limit yet, and as such she hasn't had reason to believe that there is a point at which she has to stop and recognize that there isn't more for her to find. When she was drinking more heavily during missions, even when it caused the death of herself or others, there were no long-term consequences. And the thing is, I'm not saying that she should face that kind of major consequence, but she seems as though she is scared to accept that maybe she could be happy if she stopped before she does.

I'm also not suggesting that she should stop experimenting or trying new things—the Luxon knows I am not one to talk in that realm—but I do think she is searching for novelty not because that would make her happy, but because she doesn't believe that she has the capacity to know what would make her happy. She was unaware that polyamory was even an option, so think of what else she might not be aware of! She doesn't have perfect knowledge of the world, after all, so how can she trust that she's found what she really wants? So yeah, she could fuck someone else, and it might even be an enjoyable experience that she didn't know was missing! But that only prolongs the question of what else she might be missing.

I think that deep down, she's terrified that if she doesn't keep pushing until that external hard limit, she will end up with regrets later, and simultaneously she is resentful that her friends all seem to have reached a point where they are largely content with what they have, because she wants them to have everything. She wants herself to have everything. And she has not yet allowed herself to come to terms with the fact that only she can determine when the everything of what she already has is enough, and anything else is the cherry on top.

[disappointeddyke]

It’s ok to rest, I do not have to earn it

It’s ok to rest, I do not have to earn it

It’s ok to rest, I do not have to earn it

[apicelladonna]

I wasn't sad, I just needed to see Newt Scamander and Moo Deng in one picture together.

[buglaur]

[faaun]

i feel like my life is falling apart and then my friend makes tiramisu and gives me some and asks if i wanna come to the little gathering on wednesday i feel alone in the world and then another friend asks if i want anything i feel unloveable and then we gather in my room with candles and blankets to watch a film all together until midnight it all becomes so much warmer w friends

[3dogbones]

Epic simps together ? Lmao-?

YOU KNOW WHAT, WHY NOT!!! Epic can be both of our pookie wookies >:]

colorful drawing wowzaaaaaaa! tbh I was just experimenting, I kinda like the tropic vibe here. Colors go brrrrrr (I’m sleep deprived ✨)

[siblingshuffle]

Day 11

I had the sketch for this for a while & thought now was a great time to render it :)

But I was inspired, so it’s not the only drawing for today. I released it in Megaman United the day before, but…

And, if I’m being not-quite funny about it

—————

credit for the inspiration:

Thanks, @ms-collective! (Also lol)

[sizzy-ling]

People hating on Knox like he wasn't a product of the time the movie was written or like his behavior wasn't considered the epitome of romance in the early and even late 90s (yes even the part where he kisses Chris while she's fallen asleep)! Like, yes, I understand that Knox' arc is one of the reasons why the movie didn't age as finely as it could've, but when the writers wrote him this was what was selling as romance!

[screechingfromthevoid]

The cape wrapping was too much for me I have to leave

[ninyard]

You're thinking of him going to class the first day after the trial - but what about all the day before the trial even began? When none of his classmates had any idea what happened or what could have happened or why he did it? All they knew was that he killed someone with an exy stick (if even that). And given that he's Andrews twin - Andrew who /was/ in juvie for being to aggressive - what's to say that Aaron isn't the same? What,now they have two homicidal on their campus but they are also on the deranged exy team? I cant imagine what that would have been like

Oh lord.

Like the thought of Aaron sitting in his last class of the day the day before the trial watching the time tick down and he’s felt sick to his stomach for weeks now, but it’s so much worse now that it’s so close. He can barely sit still, he’s been driving Katelyn crazy for days, let’s do this, let’s go here, let’s go there, let’s keep my mind busy so I can’t think about the fact I might be going to prison next week.

The time ticks down, and he knows he’s not going to sleep that night, and he sees the way his classmates look at him. How heads turned when one of his curious friends asked how he was feeling about everything. He can’t look them in the eyes when he says everything’s fine.

But it’s not just him, it’s not just his classmates, it’s everyone. Everyone is making him feeling fucking weird. All of his teammates are skirting around this massive elephant in the room, people are avoiding talking to him in case the trial comes up. Coach looks at him with pity. Abby looks at him like he’s a helpless lamb. Betsy sends her encouragement and kindness but she knows better than anyone what’s coming.

Aaron knows Andrew has spent two or three hours a week in Bee’s little office. He can see how Neil is doing the same thing everyone else is doing; he doesn’t know how to deal with Andrew when he’s so wound up and internally anxious. Andrew hadn’t showed up to practice for the past week. Rumour had it that he hadn’t even been doing his night practices with Kevin.

Aaron is not an insecure person, but the way everyone tiptoes around the reality of what is to come drives him crazy with self consciousness. He feels how his classmates have quietened down their conversations when he walks in. Even one of his professors kept him back after class to tell him not to worry about his final paper - she knew he was under a lot of stress, in her words, and he was already getting straight A’s in her class anyway. I did it! He wants to scream at them all. And I can’t deal with the fact that you’re going to find out why! He would rather they call him a monster to his face, than know they’re talking about him now in the way they’ve spent years talking about Andrew.

He feels guilt, in a way, seeing Andrew in as much of a state as he is. Knowing because of what he did to Drake, he was going to have to tell the world what had happened to him. Andrew was recounting his trauma and braving the witness stand just to keep Aaron out of danger. And that kills Aaron. Because he loves his brother, and he’s going crazy with worry and fear, the outcome of the case in the hands of the jury from the morning after.

[ganondoodle]

i dont think i have the right to ask this, since i so rarely have the energy to reply, but .. i want my drive to draw art back and this awful depression gone (or at least made less bad..) so desperately that i will bear the shame of asking it anyway, just in the hopes of something getting that spark i had held onto for so long to light back up

though .. im not sure what i want to ask for, i guess .. anything? something you'd like to see me draw, a compliment, a question- whether zelda or oc related, a little totk rant of your own, a picture of your cat, a random fun fact-

[chaoticattt]

its nearly midnight again… and I’m meant to be doing art homework. Again.

wooooooo burnout I fucking hate this

Either way have a concept sketch of overblot!Aevi I made like agessss ago

[1driedpersimmon]

At Journey’s end what can you do but start another!