#I dunno I know I'm rambling here I'm just thinking a lot about Stuff and it's making me particularly emotional tonight

[soap-is-an-artist]

gonna ramble about charlie and auron because i just got out the premiere and. holy shit.

if I'm way off base on my analysis i am so sorry, im still processing, these are just my initial thoughts on stuff. and if you disagree id love to discuss it!

okay so first things first i screamed a LOT. I was so relieved when Charlie said he wasn't mad at Cas [i would've cried probably]. Auron made some truly wild comments. case in point: "I would probably slap the taste out of your mouth if it wouldn't mean getting you all hot and bothered just in time for Casper to drop me off at the office, pull into the parking garage, and fuck some goddamn sense into you." I YELLED OMFG auron. you can't just SAY shit like that. Then the Disney princess line. Charlie sounded so weak when he said "can we go back to that part about 'Casper fucking some sense into me'??" And Auron answering with "Not until I'm outside of the vehicle. You'll have to find someone else to watch." AURON. STOP PLEASE IM GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK FROM LAUGHING

alright moving on from that let's get to the serious shit. Charlie is justified to be angry about Auron interfering in his personal life; it ISN'T a healthy way to interact with people, whether you want to befriend them or not. Auron orchestrated this whole scheme because he doesn't know how to communicate his feelings, and you know what? I get it. He doesn't know what normal is, and it's not really his fault that he doesn't know. But he can at least try? Wikihow is free, brother /lh

Charlie wanted a fresh start. He wanted to disconnect from the dangerous world that Auron is a participant in, he wanted to earn his own way in the world, earn a bit of self damn respect like he deserves. Auron undermined all that, despite his good intentions. He lied, big time. And that's kinda shitty and not okay!

Was it about control? Keeping a hand on loose ends, like Charlie thinks? Auron just wanted to "protect him", right? Well, as someone who has had much of their life controlled by people who ALSO just wanted to "protect" me, that's a very weak excuse for taking away someone's agency. Now, our situations aren't exactly the same. Auron is not Charlie's parents [THANK GOD] and there actually some things Charlie isn't aware of that he needs to be protected from! But this was not the move. Like.. at all.

What's my solution? I dunno. But maybe don't force all these things to happen. Perhaps send an email rather than getting your guy to hunt down your former employee's childhood friend/crush and sneakily reunite them behind his back? Or at least try the email first, Auron. Charlie calling Auron out on playing pretend, "just writing one of your little stories"... ouch. But does he kinda deserve that? Yeah. I think so.

[Side note: Charlie talking about how if he'd sought out Cas on his own terms, it would've worked out because they fall in love every time? "Because that's where I'm supposed to be." I. fucking. fell over. I had to fucking BITE something omg. Yeah im biased in this argument sorry lol, i definitely have a favorite here]

HOWEVER: Auron admits that he was wrong! He is not an unrepentant man and he DIDN'T double down! That is a big point in his favor imo. He doesn't actually say "sorry" but he uses a lot more words to mean something... similar? I guess that's a fanfic writer's way. I get it, I also elaborate way too much. So, an actual clear cut "Charlie, I'm sorry I fucked with your life behind your back just because I wanted to be friends with you" would've been nice. But this will do for now.

Also Charlie you REALLY need to watch out for Finn that guy is a freakkkkk he will fuck you up big time. Not normal Finn. The magic one.

Okay I'm done typing whatever pops into my head with the barest pretense at organization lmao, I'll revisit this in time once my thoughts marinate a little more

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Me: *supportive heartfelt message*

Person: *responds*

Me: What the frick

[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

How about a poly!plastics where our class goes on a trip and reader gets lost or something

Lost

read part 2 here

|| poly!plastics x fem!reader

(i myself am poly)

|| Warnings; panic, reader gets lost, regina being regina

|| Summary; Ms Norbury takes some of the grade on a field trip to the mall; of course the plastics go along. Because it's the mall. Reader ends up losing her group.

Requests open!

Started; october 6th

Finished; october 7th

~~~

The mall seemed to be filled with more foot traffic than usual today as Ms Norbury lead the grade through the hall. She turned to face the group, clapping her hands above her head in a certain rhythm to get their attention. Normally, something like that wouldn't always work; but Ms Norbury could be a little intimidating sometimes. So she had a good hold on the students.

"Alright, listen up! We have from 11:30 until 3:00 to explore the mall as a well deserved end of year break. Take this time to relax now that your exams are over, just don't stray from your groups! I expect everyone back at 3:00. Got it?" Ms Norbury explained how this would go and there were murmured agreements amongst the students. She dismissed the group and everyone went their separate ways; with you following your girlfriends.

"So like, where should we start first?" Karen looked beyond ecstatic. She was practically vibrating from head to toe with excitement.

Regina just looked annoyed by it as she rolled her eyes and sighed," it's a mall, Karen. There's like a billion stores here. What difference does it make where we start?"

"Well, I think we'd otta go to the high-end stores. You know, get all the good stuff before it's gone," Gretchen rambled out, her arm wrapping around Karen's almost as an instinctive defence to Regina's response.

Regina turned to you for your opinion," What do you think?"

You couldn't afford the high end stuff, but you didn't want them to know that so you shrugged. "I dunno. As long as we hit the food court."

"Oo! Can we go there first! I'm hungry." Karen agreed with you, Regina thought about it and then shrugged.

"Yeah, whatever. Let's go."

With Regina leading the way, the four of you headed to the food court. It was packed more than usual today, noticing that a lot of your fellow classmates had decided to hit the food court first as well. You were struggling to keep up with your girlfriends, who seemed to move through the crowd with ease.

"Regina-" You had started to ask if she could slow down, but then somebody bumped you and you stumbled to the ground. Grunting as your head hit the floor.

You stayed where you were for a moment, trying to get your dizziness under control. When you stood again, you couldn't see where your girlfriends had gone. Panic settled in and you tried following, making assumptions as to where they might've gone but to no effort. It was like they disappeared in the sea of people.

Your eyes wandered around, trying to spot them but you ended up seeing someone with a phone instead. Seeing it reminded you that you had your own phone; in your panic state you had forgotten all about it. You took it out and tried to call Gretchen, only to realize your phone was dead. Great. Perfect timing.

Putting the useless block back into your pocket, you wandered around. Hoping to find someone you knew, because you really didn't want to talk to a stranger.

It took a few very long minutes, but you managed to find Janis, Cady and Damian in Hot Topic. Janis was showing Cady a bunch of the stuff, while Cady just nodded along. Seeming very out of place.

"Cady!" You yelled, running over. She turned to look at you and waved, the two of you were decent friends. Not best friends by any means, but you got along well whenever you had to do projects together and such.

"Hey, Y/N!" She gave you a smile, while Janis just side eyed you. Definitely more wary of why you were there.

"Do you have your phone with you?" You asked, she nodded and took it out.

"Yeah, why?"

"I lost my girlfriends and my phone's dead, can I call them with yours?" You explained, Cady nodded in understanding and unlocked her phone for you.

Meanwhile, Karen was the first to notice you were no longer following them. She frowned and stopped to look around, which got Gretchen's attention and she wrapped an arm around Karen's.

"Mama, why'd you stop?" Gretchen asked, watching her with concern.

"Where's Y/N/N?" Karen replied, still searching the food court for you.

That got Regina to stop and she paused for a moment. Looking back at Gretchen and Karen," she's right-" She stopped talking. You weren't right with them. How had she missed that? "Gretchen, call her."

Gretchen nodded and quickly took out her phone, giving you a call only for it to not go through. She frowned and looked at Regina," she didn't answer."

"Call her until she does." Regina replied, arms folded across her chest.

She was about to call again when she got a call from Cady, something in her told her she should answer. So she did and put it on speaker. "Cady?"

"Y/N." You corrected, Gretchen couldn't help but noticed how panicked you sounded.

"Babe!" Gretchen relaxed, Regina did too though she was more subtle about it and Karen just seemed happy to hear you.

"Hiiii, Y/N!" Karen said.

Regina snatched Gretchen's phone and held it so she could talk to you," Where the hell are you? Why do you have Cady's phone?"

"Mine died, but I found Cady and asked if I could use hers. We're at Hot Topic with Janis and Damian, can you come get me?"

"Gross, Hot Topic?" Regina cringed, Karen looked a little interested.

"Regina," You practically whined, wanting her to focus on the more important matters.

"Okay, okay. We'll meet you there. But stay put. Got it?" Her tone was demanding, laced in authority but you easily agreed. Not wanting to risk getting even more lost.

Regina hung up and handed Gretchen back her phone, leading her girlfriends right to you.

When they got there, Karen ran over and jumped into your arms. Relieved you were okay. You stumbled a bit but managed to keep both of you up; holding the taller girl.

"Hi, baby." You had fully relaxed now and held her close, giving her neck a kiss. Gretchen ran over and joined the hug while Regina stayed off to the side, taking a photo.

She posted it with the caption,

this idiot got lost 🙄

You thanked Cady again for her letting you use her phone, then headed off with your girlfriends. Deciding to avoid the food court and hit somewhere else in the mall. Gretchen made sure you were always with them, her hand never letting go of yours.

[heavenmercy]

I never understood why people dont bring Gregory being interested on military stuff more. I remember loving Gregory because of the military aspects of his character.

I had studied War history and Military history for years, it's actually a big part of the things I'm interested in. I mostly specialize on the history of UK and France's side of it in past history. I also study on UK's Airforce during a specific era, the Supermarine Spitfires and Hawker Hurricanes are something I really really love.. And basically put that onto Gregory's interest too.

But anyways I really feel like people should point it out more! Gregory literally leads the revolution so prepared and is canon that he has done stuff like this before.

AND AND LOOK AT THESE LITTLE ARMY FIGURES I know that it's not implied of who own these, but I like to think they're Gregorys since he's the one handling them to tell the plans of where they should go and how the base is set up.

Another thing I found in detail is the song that comes up in the background when Gregory finds the La Resistance's hideout.

(Starts at 0:37)

I know, It might be a stretch, but to me it sounds so familiar (or at least inspired) by army marching music, it defiantly has the tone to it, which is a detail I adore and I never see anyone point it out before I also feel like it makes sense since the setting of the movie is... mostly about military and war themes, Gregory volunteers to be apart of this, defiantly has experience, knows what hes talking about, and has knowledge about it. (Note: He's also literally political about the American government and all the shit going on) And of course he knows Christophe who also very similarly is experienced in those topics too (I mean.. look at him) And the final part, is Gregory of course being inspired by Enjolras (Les Misérables) which is basically about the French Revolution War... (I know its not Military specifically but I really hope you get what Im putting down) I just love the details! I feel like Gregory is defiantly a military interest guy and loves taking charge of something he knows a lot about. I like the headcanon of it and how theres canon parts that can back it up. People kinda ignore it a lot... which is upsetting, since it's such a big part of his character. But of course, I won't put this as something people need to force into their headcanons and face it as 100% fact. I only find it disappointing that it's just a detail that is left neglected and barley even brought up.

(Old art coming in ew)

I remember featuring it on past Gregory artwork ... and I am considering just bringing it up again not only here but in future stuff as well. I dunno, I just wanted to ramble and I hope I had pointed out stuff that you didnt know about before!!

Military Gregory ily, they'll never make me hate you

[itstheval]

Memory of Visitation

A @livesworthlivingau Side Story

"Oh Stars, I remember this town! This place sucked!"

Siffrin said it with a laugh as they entered Wolworth, but everyone else simply glanced strangely at him. The realization hit them at the same time it did Mira, from the look on their faces. "Time travel s-" "NO SPOILERS!"

Mira half-pulled her rapier, but the look on her face was one of jest that kept a smile on Siffrin's face, even as they raised their hands up defensively. "Okay, okay! I just…There were a lot of memories wrapped up in this town. So, uh…" His eyes flickered around to the others, looking for help, and getting only amusement at his plight.

"Hmf. I believe, I will go take a walk. To explore. Bonnie, would you come with me? You have the shopping list." "Aw, Crab, I wanted to hear!" Mirabelle harumphed her way away, frills spinning as she twirled on a heel and walked into town, leaving Siffrin staring helplessly as Bonnie rushed to catch up with her, hat bouncing with every rushed step. Vale's laugh broke the tension, and Siffrin turned back to look at them. "Oh well DONE, Stardust! We can really see the skills it took you thirty years to hone!"

The flush darkening their cheeks was matched only by their urge to snap back, and they managed to find their voice. "Don't laugh too hard, Vale, not until you find out WHAT happened here. Besides, I might make sure it happens to you…"

"We got here…I want to say a few months, after the King? We'd met you, Nille, but there was a lot you didn't know. I hadn't even opened up to everyone yet…I'd say I'm sorry, but you know. Wrong people to apologize to. But you, Odile! You're always too clever, and you'd noticed, by now."

"I'll take that as a compliment." Odile managed, smiling wryly. She recognized an Old Man Ramble by now, but Siffrin's stories were always worth the listen.

"Noticed what, precisely?" Vale's question was colder, but from the look on their face, the queasiness in their expression, they already knew.

"Well…Back then. Before I knew any better. And I want to make it real clear, I know better now! But back then, I would…Punish myself. With my dagger. For things that…hadn't happened, to any of you? And I'd hide it with my Craft, which…I learned way more about the limits of Healing Craft than I should have."

Siffrin didn't bother looking at everyone's faces. He knew what they looked like. He'd seen them before, and they broke his heart the first time, when it was Odile revealing this. Even so much later, thinking about those expressions hurt.

What he wasn't expecting was the sudden enfolding of arms around him. Isabeau's warm body against his, enfolding him, and a moment later Odile's hand on his head, patting it gently. Even Nille joined in on the hug, and a glance up showed Vale nearby, looking in. This was…different? This was nice. Until, on some unspoken signal, everyone stepped away.

"I'm sorry Sif, just…the look on your face. I don't think anybody could see that and NOT want to give you a hug! We know it's alright, but the way you looked…"

"Like a crab just pinched your puppy." Nille confirmed.

"Yeah, or like…I dunno, like someone ate your favorite treat you were saving for later!"

In that moment, he was loved. In all moments, he was loved, but it was nice to see it so clearly, and the smile Siffrin let onto his face was genuine. "Thanks…I don't like thinking about this stuff. But, no bottling myself up, not to my family! That's what I promised."

"Promised who, precisely?" Odile's voice was wry, in the way that came when she was trying to not show affection.

"Well I was getting to that! Before everyone decided it was group hug time! Anyway! Odile noticed, and she…told everyone, when we were here. I'm not ashamed to say, I ran off. I was stupid…I thought none of you would care about me if you knew how much I hated myself."

"You're absolutely right, Stardust." Vale finally decided to add their two cents, and everyone's heads snapped towards them, making them glad that looks couldn't kill - they'd be dead four times over, at least! It was Odile who found her voice first.

"Explain?"

"He WAS stupid!"

Vale's laugh cut the tension that their statement made, and Siffrin was the first to join into it, before everyone else allowed themselves to be part of it.

"Right! Right, where was I…Running away. Right. Well, Odile was too smart again." A glance to her showed a smirk that showed she agreed. "I ran and hid in the House…and her letter had gotten there first. And when people showed up expecting me, and bringing me to an appointment? I wasn't going to tell them they had the wrong person. Whoever's appointment it was, I could hide there until you all forgot! And that's how I met my therapist."

The sharp bark of laughter from Odile showed just what she thought of that, but Isabeau was quick to follow, as Nille shook her head in exasperation. "That actually worked?" She said, around a smile, and Vale nodded with mock seriousness. "It would have worked on me. Smart."

Siffrin decided then to start walking and talking, as he explained the rest of it. "Doctor Jinn was…strange. Even for Vaugarde. It/its pronouns, with lightless hair with darkless spots in it, like the stars. I'd have almost thought it was from home, except that everyone I've seen from there had darkless hair…and Doctor Jinn was a housemaiden. Or…I mean, it was working in the house, and it wore a change symbol on a necklace? And one of them for a bonding earring? Anyway, it had its own office set up, and was ready for me and everything. It wasn't until it addressed me by my name that I realized what happened. But Odile, why did you tell it my name was 'Siffrin Nomiddlename Nolastname'?"

"I couldn't begin to imagine." Odile allowed, walking the crowded streets, Isabeau pushing ahead and the others walking in the wake of the broad man like wakesurfers…Siffrin briefly wondered where he'd heard that term, then remembered they were telling a story.

"Well, that's what it called me. Like that, like 'Nomiddlename' and 'Nolastname' were names themselves. It was a great listener, I'll tell you that…It seemed to accept the Wish Craft stuff pretty easily, and didn't blame me for…" a light cough. "Any of it." Siffrin glanced to the side, and when the others followed their glance, they saw Bonnie at a stall, haggling with a zit-faced teen about the price of tomatoes.

"The interesting thing was…Well, when we got there, we were sort of wandering wherever we felt like, just seeing the world? And it turned out that Jinn was traveling anyway, so we wound up joining it…or it joined us, but we just wound up going where it led. It was convenient, and it meant I couldn't get away from it, either. So…we wound up talking a lot. Almost the whole time we were in Wolworth, and even on the roads." Sif took a turn, but kept up his memories. "About the Loops, about what I could and couldn't remember, about…well, everything, really. How I felt about Isa, how I felt about touch, home, why the Universe granted wishes like it did - it really didn't have much to say there, but it was great to just get it out of my system."

Vale was starting to look uneasy as they walked along, and Siffrin knew it was now or never, time to strike and hope everyone else was on board. "It was so useful, in fact, that I felt like visiting again. I sent a letter ahead myself this time, since…well, you didn't have a reason to, Madame. And don't worry, Vale, I told them all about you!"

Siffrin's grin was shameless, and watching the look on Vale's face was worth the entire time, as they realized how close they were to the opened doors of the House. And how Isabeau was blocking them off to the side…Vale couldn't escape that way, maybe…no, Nille was over there. Maybe through the Madame? With that look on her face, no way. That was the Path of Pain.

Vale's shoulders slumped, as Siffrin stepped aside and gave a sweeping bow. "After you, my friend!" Vale muttered oaths under their breath as they marched to the doors, only to find a Housemaiden waiting for them.

"Siffrin and Vale Nomiddlename Nolastname? I'm Housemaiden David…I got your letter, but I'm afraid no one here's ever heard of a 'Doctor Jinn'. Would you like to come in anyway?"

[frozenjokes]

A Little Question About Love (It’s Not Little At All, Though Scar Is A Bit Frustrated It’s Not As Simple As It Is On TV)

“Hey, thanks again for driving me to the zoo all week, G, I really appreciate it. Still can’t believe how stiff my arm is, I mean, yeah, I expected it to hurt for a while, but I’m so sore!”

Grian chuckled in the driver’s seat, but kept his eyes on the road as he turned onto the street where the employee parking lot was located. Given how massive Scar’s zoo was, it took quite a while to navigate the surrounding area, so he needed to maintain some focus. “So sore you can’t bring your other one up to the wheel either? That sounds pretty bad, Scar, maybe I should turn this car back around and take you home. You might even need to go back to the hospital!”

“No! No no, that won’t be necessary. I just can’t drive, Grian, see, the seatbelt pushes real hard on my arm and shoulder and when I lift it like that it’s so much worse! Blame the seatbelt, blame the seatbelt.”

“And your other arm?”

“Have you heard of phantom pain?”

“Pretty sure we already discussed that’s not how phantom pain works, but sure Scar, go on.”

“Agony, Grian, agony. Can’t lift my arms,” Scar caught Grian’s eye, throwing him a wink, “Only in the car though. A very specific problem, nothing any doctor could address without wasting hours of our time.”

“Our time?”

“Well, duh, you’re my driver!” Scar laughed, and Grian joined him, unable to help himself. Scar could never accept an injury as it was and let himself rest when he needed it. Always moving, always working; that was the Scar way. An idle Scar was a miserable one; it didn’t matter what he was doing as long as he was moving, though he always did prefer to have someone to talk to. It’s why he hated to be at home for too long, or worse, the hospital he frequented as a result of his recklessness. Grian had a theory it’s why he hated driving as well. Sure, it wasn’t quite idle, but sitting still and focusing was not Scar’s forte. Of course, Grian didn’t mind.

He was content with the small silence as he pulled into the parking lot, but Scar would never let that stand.

“I’ve been thinking about something you said recently. I'm just curious, I guess.”

Grian tensed, glancing in Scar’s direction. He looked thoughtful, but in an impossibly neutral way, difficult to read. “Scar, that could mean anything, buddy. Gonna need you to be a lot more specific.”

“Oh!” Scar looked surprised, as if he hadn’t just said something deeply terrifying, “Sorry! Just thinking. It was with Mumbo, after he got upset and bit me, y’know. When I wanted to go after him, I mean. You were really worried and it kinda made me think and stuff.”

Grian deflated, his shoulders sinking a little closer to his chest, “Scar, I really don’t want to talk about that. You know it makes me upset.”

“No- it’s not about you getting upset, I know why you were and I really am sorry. That’s another thing that’s been in my mind but not the thing,” Scar began to ramble and Grian let himself fall back against the seat, resigned to the fact that this was happening. He didn’t want to have this conversation again. He just didn’t want Scar to get himself killed; a high order apparently.

Scar continued regardless, “It was more about.. I dunno, I mean, I’d say we’re pretty close. We’re close, right?” Scar didn’t give Grian any time to answer, “And you said that I mean a lot to you, and you mean a lot to me too, but I don’t know what that means to me, and then you said that I’ve got a lot of people who love me, but it kinda sounded like you were saying you loved me, and that’s great, I also have feelings that are like that, but I also also don’t know what that means really, to love someone. And I was just thinking about it. I love you, of course I do, but what does that mean? Does it mean anything? When you told me you loved me, what did that mean to you?”

Grian gaped. What the fuck else could he do. What the fuck was even happening here???

“Scar. Are you. What are you asking here. What are you saying.”

“I love you.”

“Okay.” Grian gripped the wheel so hard he was sure his nails would leave indents. He didn’t even bother trying to park; halfway between the lines of two spots would have to do. “You love me. What does that mean.”

“I don’t know. That’s why I asked you.” Scar was infuriatingly relaxed, like this was just a normal conversation with zero implications at all.

“I can’t tell you how you feel, Scar!”

“Well you said you loved me first, so I was asking you what that meant.”

“I didn’t- I said people love you, Scar, like your friends and family! That people would be very upset if you died doing something dumb- it- it wasn’t meant to be some kind of confession?”

“Oh, I didn’t think so!” Scar threw up his hands in defense, like that was at all obvious.

“Then what did you think?”

“I thought that you loved me.”

“Of course I love you- obviously I love you. What is happening here? Why are you so stuck on this?”

“I just don’t know what it means. I don’t know how to tell the difference and I thought that if you loved me you might be able to tell me. I feel like I love everyone the same, and that’s all sorts of confusing. I mean, maybe besides family love, but that’s more complicated, there’s like- layers.”

Grian had to fight to keep himself from gaping. This was not the conversation he thought he’d be having today. “Well,” he forced his voice back into a more even tone, something a little nicer, “For me, yeah, kinda. There’s a lot that goes into love, layers, like you said. There’s the kinda unconditional respect I have for most everyone, and it builds from there? Friendship of course, elements of physical attraction can further things sometimes. Attraction in general makes a big difference, and not just physical, it’s an emotional thing too. Personality. Mannerisms. It’s a slow thing for me most of the time. That’s not always the case though, some people fall fast. For me it’s like.. a slow infatuation with the wholeness of someone. Not necessarily loving every trait, but kinda respecting it, y’know?”

“Like friends.”

“Like- no, not like friends, like being in love. Romantically.”

“That’s friends though.”

“It’s not- Scar how many of your friends do you feel all those ways about- how many of your friends are you physically attracted to?”

“A few. Close friends, Grian, obviously. And come on, like all of our shared friends are hot, physical attraction can not be the deciding factor here, that does not make any sense.”

Grian shrugged. “We do have many hot friends.”

“I know! I think you’re attractive.”

If Grian had been drinking anything he would have spit it all over the dashboard, “You- Scar!” Scar didn’t seem to notice his words had any effect though, rambling on.

“I mean, seriously, what the hell is supposed to be the difference here! Platonic, romantic, I’m half convinced everyone has just been lying to me. I keep waiting for all these rainbows and sparkles to light up in my brain and go yup! There it is! That’s romance, that’s love, and it’s like- yeah love as in my friends who I love dearly, who I’d happily spend the rest of my life with if I got the chance-“

“-Scar-“

“-Yeah, I mean obviously when I tell you I love you I mean very explicitly every single one of those things you mentioned. Every! One! I don’t hand out ‘I love yous’ for free, I mean it. That’s not the same for everyone though, and that doesn’t bother me or anything, but doesn’t it feel a little confusing sometimes? So that wasn’t what you meant when you said that, right?” Scar looked at him so genuinely, so innocently, like that was the easiest question to answer in the world.

“Uhm. Yeah, I. Love. I love you, Scar.”

“Great!” Scar preened, apparently fully, completely, entirely satisfied with what just happened here, “This is great. Glad we’re on the same page.” And then he gathered his things and just left. Opened the car door, personal items in hand, and walked away with a goddamn smile on his face before Grian could even hope to yell out the window, WE ARE NOT ON THE SAME PAGE.

Instead, he buried his head in his hands, screamed a little, punched the passenger seat, let his face hit the car horn, then drove home, feeling overall very normal about that little conversation.

read the rest of the fic here

[hyperfixingfr]

I'm putting this in the tags for the people who are sending me rude asks. Please do the mature thing and just don't send me nasty things. Thanks.

For the last time since I keep getting nasty fucking asks about it insulting me and calling me names; I am not tryna run none of you people outta this damn fandom and that was never my goal so quit playing victim and pretending I am. This is a fandom for everyone, obviously... Which is why I criticize when you guys treat it like it isn't. I was trying countless times yesterday to drop the conversation when the person arguing with me kept insisting that they had an issue with me talking about an aspect they didn't like, because they were arguing with me over an opinion I had that they didn't like, not over something that mattered. This aspect personally affected me, and many others in the server. This isn't an aspect I enjoy people pretending is cute or funny because it caused very, very real damage to things like body positivity. I don't try to fight with ANYONE here, ever. My entire goal in these situations is to educate when someone believes this is bad behavior by explaining why it's problematic to gloss over this aspect or glorify it when it was a very real issue. Please, ask yourself why you're beefing with a minor. I beg of you. This person had no intention to listen to me, OR the server owner, when we told them that they can have different opinions and simply ignore it if they don't like it. They also ignored the countless attempts at de-escalating the situation, proving they just wanted to argue about it.

I should also mention this person said some really nasty things that implied I was apart of cancel culture, or on the "everything is problematic" bandwagon which is kind of implying they think that criticizing bigotry is wrong, even when it's coming from the minority group it affected. My criticizing of a media is not disliking of a media, nor is it "cancel culture". I am not trying to CANCEL a show from the 2000s. I am merely pointing out its flaws. If you can't handle being apart of a morally flawed show's fandom, don't be apart of it. Not only that, but this person made passive aggressive comments such as "wow you ramble a lot" completely unnecessarily when I was speaking. Why was this needed? I know I do. Why are you trying to insinuate that my passion about the subject is weird? Either way, I wasn't trying to have this fight. They were. This person said a lot of insensitive things to me, claiming I pulled the autism card when I rebuttaled the "wow you ramble a lot" stuff, telling me they had an issue with me merely discussing a topic that was 100% allowed in the server (stated by the server owner, the channel was allowed for criticism), and was overall very passionate about putting me in the wrong for simply pointing out and discussing the flaws of a show because it was brought up. That's not okay and that's incredibly judgy. I dunno why this person can't admit they're wrong, but it's not hard to understand that my criticism is not unwarranted nor is it unwelcome. I did nothing wrong by speaking about it in a channel that directly said criticism was allowed.

Do not play victim when you started the argument AND fueled the argument when people tried to stop it. Simple as. I'm really hoping this person realizes they're wrong and apologizes appropriately like a mature adult, because this is ridiculous. This is such a stupid thing for them to have fought me over and no one's gonna be upset if they just... Did the right thing and apologize. This applies to ANY of you who mess up. If you mess up and realize you've done something you shouldn't have, just apologize man. Especially in a case like this where the person was arguing over "toma-to, tamato-e" or whatever. They didn't like my WARRENTED opinion and they got on my ass about it repeatedly, and I got nothing out of asking them why they held it because their response was basically "you don't like this media how I like it, so you can't possibly like it, get out". Hence, them asking why I'm in a server of fans if I... "Don't like the show". Simply because I criticized an aspect.

Please, if any of you don't believe me, the server is open for the public. You can go in there and see the conversation yourself. I am not hiding myself at all from this, and I'm glad to share evidence that I did just as I said and they did just as I said. This is a stupid fvking argument and any of you still dragging it on should be ashamed for thinking this is worth arguing about. People have opinions, leave it at that. What happened to respecting valid stances?

[walkingintheheartbreaksatellite]

I’m Here, Right Here Pt. 1

(Harry Styles x Implied Bi!Fem!reader)

My take from when I first listened to satellite!

Y/N is Jeff's assistant and Harry's best friend. She's been in and out of relationships for one reason or another and is upset. Harry is hopelessly in love with her and she is too blind to see it.

Dating while traveling is not for the weak..

After yet another failed date, I return to my hotel room to find Harry propping himself against my door. He turns his attention to me and smiles when he sees me.

"Hey! Was looking for you. Thought you might want to get some dinner? Sushi and a movie? Haven't done that in a while.."

I sigh and frown, shaking my head as I unlock my door, Harry following me inside.

"That's really sweet, H, but not tonight. I'm honestly exhausted and all I want to do is shower and crash. Rain check? I promise we'll do it tomorrow."

He frowns before nodding.

"Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

I sniffle as I pull off my makeup, trying not to cry.

"I just don't know what I'm doing wrong! Like this guy! His name was Todd... It seemed like we had a lot in common but halfway through dinner, he saw my tattoos and he started scolding me. Then he proceeded to tell me what I was doing wrong in my life, starting with my career choice-."

He lets out a laugh and shakes his head as he collapses on my bed.

"What? You want to be a music producer. I'd say you're heading in the right direction."

I groan and start to pull off my jewelry.

"No, because apparently, that's not a good career for a wife. Like, as if dude! I want things for myself. Im not gonna be some stay at home wife popping out babies, you know? H...Harry, are you listening to me?"

He doesn't answer but he lifts his hand up and gives me a thumbs up. I sigh and change my clothes in the bathroom before coming out and plopping on my stomach next to him.

"What do you think I should do, H?"

He sighs and he's quiet for a minute, his eyes looking anywhere but at me.

"You could stop... Take a break from dating."

I groan and plop my head into the bed.

"I'm not getting any younger! I want things sure, but I want to be happy too!"

He sits up, finally looking down into my eyes, a serious look on his face.

"Aren't you though? You've got all your friends. You've told me time and time again that the perfect one for me will come when I least expect it. So why not try taking your own advice?"

With that, he gets up and heads to the door. I frown, quickly getting up from the bed and chasing after him. I give him a pout and he sighs.

He gives me a small hug and leaves my room, not saying another word.

As promised, the next night, we get sushi and watch some movies. As I stuff my face with California Rolls, Harry continues to ramble.

"You've gone on a date almost every stop we've been on! Who does that?!"

He laughs and I can't help but shrug.

"Someone who just doesn't have any luck, I guess? Every date I've been on... No one really seems to stick out. And it's not like I'm not keeping my options open! But it's just... I don't know."

He nods in understanding before popping a California roll in his mouth.

"Are you gonna sue the dating apps like in that movie? What was it.. Love Guaranteed?"

I snort and choke on my food a little before shaking my head.

"No! That's just a movie! As if I'd meet some attractive lawyer and fall in love! Crazy talk! And what about you, Mr. Pop Star? You've been single for a while. Where's your love life going?"

He doesn't look at me but he shrugs.

"Dunno. Just kind of focusing on my music right now. Figured I've got time, right? No use in worrying."

He drops the topic and we hang out for the rest of the night. For the next week, Harry seems pretty quiet around me, and I'm not really sure why. Mr. Azoff gave me the night off, even though there's a show.

I had originally planned to go on a date, but my date cancelled, so I decide to watch the show. I stand next to Mr. Azoff as I watch Harry go up on stage.

"Why are you still here? Thought you had a hot date?"

I shake my head with a sigh, holding my sweater close to me.

"Cancelled on me. Thought I might enjoy watching him without having to run around for once."

He nods with a small smile. It's quiet for a minute between the two of us, until he says something I wasn't expecting.

"I've noticed you've been going on dates a lot... At least once every stop, if not more."

My eyes widen and I try to defend myself.

"Mr. Azoff-."

He frowns and shakes his head.

"Y/N, I'm not saying this as your boss. I'm saying this as your friend. You do it in your down time but we're all just a bit worried about you. This has to be a lot on you. Just... Talk to someone about it, okay? If you're doing it because you feel alone, don't. You have so many people who care about you. So just... Take it easy, okay?"

I nod and turn my attention back to the stage. Watching Harry up there.. No matter how many times I watch, he's always so captivating. I can't take my eyes off him...

After the show is over, Harry quickly takes a shower. I run out, offering to grab coffee for the band. When I come back, I get echos of thank you's and when I give Harry his coffee, he gives me a look of shock.

"Thought you had a date tonight? What are you doing here?"

He takes the coffee from my hand and I plop down next to him on the sofa, slipping off my heels before resting my feet on the coffee table.

"A bust. Yet again. Maybe next time will work, right? Aren't you the one always telling me to be optimistic?"

He's quiet and he simply stands up before he turns to face me, a look of anger on his face.

"Why are you doing this to yourself, Y/N? You come to me every time, crying for one reason or another how it didn't work out and you're so sad that you're alone! Did you ever think that maybe you're not alone?!"

I stand up and cross my arms, looking straight at him.

"Harry, you don't know what it's like! People like you! I have to work my ass off to make sure I'm appealing to others! I want more! I want love! Don't you get that?"

He shakes his head and walks to the door before turning around to face me again.

"Did you ever stop and think that maybe I might love you?! That watching you go on date after date is killing me?!"

My eyes widen and I stutter.

"H-Harry.."

He shakes his head once again, and stares straight into my eyes.

"It's always round and round with you! Like a fucking satellite! I'm just- I'm done Y/N. I've tried. For months. But I'm done."

He doesn't say another word as he leaves and I fall onto the couch, tears starting to fall down my face.

He was right there?

🚾 1283

Part 2

——————————————————

Please like and reblog!

Tag list

@be-with-me-so-happily @swiftmendeshoran

@babyiamperfectforyou @freedomfireflies

@kaminokatiee @harrysmimi

@violetsandfluff @fruitmans @fruitmansrecs @strwbrrydaydreams

@rafaaoli @novalunosising

[deathdetermineslife]

how do you manage to get any followers or friends in the selfshipping community? is it just luck?

for months i’ve been trying to interact with others and follow people, engaging with stuff like ask games and hosting reblog games, but when i try to share any artwork or i reblog an ask game myself, its radio silence. like even in small discords i get ignored so bad

i don’t say this at all to be guilt tripping /gen, it’s genuine curiosity at how this stuff even works. like am i doing something wrong or is the community just like this?

here is my comprehensive and lame guide on How To Get Selfship Followers

step 1 - posting

so a lot of my posts are either kinda general or fun. folks I will not lie to you. these are all stupid shit that come to my mind on a day to day basis. for example, today, I thought, "man I'm such a loser I'm not in college like all my friends r" and then I was like "omg wait. i could make a post out of this" so I did that.

you also kinda gotta be conistent. so i try to post at least *something* everyday. even if its a reblog, tho, I don't reblog a lot of things other than ask games.

another thing with posting is that i do try to make a lot of community based content. so idk if yall remember but in the beginning of my account, I did the "things you can do if you have xyz f/o". i did like,,, I think almost 100 of those ?????? it was a lot. then I started making templates and I made some ask games and ofc I post a lot of general like,,, imagine stuff. oh also polls. people seem to enjoy polls.

step 2 - be positive

this is the big thing. as most of yall (hopefully) know, I do not fw proshippers !! but I don't talk about discourse unless its directly brought up. not only this, I put a big focus on just,,, being nice idk. like id like to think I'm a pretty down to earth person.

if you make a template and people tag you in it, say something nice! reply to peoples art, send in asks, things like that. i try to do my part in being nice. i also just like hearing about peoples selfships.

when people post promos and have the little "rb to be moots", reblog! when you come across someone having a bad day, maybe they made a vent or something, reply with a simple "I hope you feel better <3" or "your f/o loves you <3". things like that, ya know?

step 3 - have fun

genuinely. i post as much as i do because I like it. i didn't go into this thinking "oh... yea... I'm gonna get selfship famous..." like no I just wanna ramble somewhere bc none of my close irls r selfshippers.

you wont get popular or get followers because you grind out posts. literally one of my biggest posts on this account I wrote while I was half asleep one night and wanted to test out queuing on my account.

and in that regard, it is partially luck. i don't control what posts people do and don't like. sometimes I write up imagines and no one sees them. sometimes I write up a post saying "lol go kiss your fake boyfriend ooo smoochie smoochie" and that does numbers

step 4 - interaction

im only in two servers. one server (which was the first public server I think I ever joined ???? i could be wrong tho,,, bad memory blehg) that I don't own and then my own 18+ server. i don't think being in servers does anything,,, considering I'm only in one that isn't mine. i think its more like ,,, sticking to one or two places ?? like just being consistently in an area you're comfortable in.

i guess you gotta just find the right people ??? and like I mentioned, be friendly, but ya know. also I guess tags too? idk if you look at any of my regular posts I have 8 million tags on them. idk if that actually does anything or not because its kinda hit or miss sometimes.

i was gonna say something else but i forgot. see look listen I dunno how I got here but this is what I do ,,,, effectively nothing. also with the being kind thing, maybe this is how I am bc I'm pagan but I think that if you expect kindness back you wont get anything. sometimes its just nice to be nice. eventually you gain a reputation for being a nice person. you kinda have to not want that tho? like I don't see myself as particularly like ,,, super kind ,,,??? i just do what feels right.

step 5 - uhhhh idk im just rambling now

i guess i also went into this kinda like. damn sometimes this community is a cesspool of absolute meanie pants. i don't wanna be a Meanie Pants and just post my thoughts and the things I think about. i guess how I see it too is, I kinda like ? idk I think all these things anyways why not post them? kinda feels like a waste not to.

also ive been told my posts are pretty recognizable bc of how I format them ? my dividers and such. also tagging all of my imagines and stuff with my 🥀📜 emojis. i guess that helps too? because that's how I recognize certain accounts. "like oh there's them I recognize their dividers and their tags".

also you kinda gotta like,,, not let hate get to you. like have fun with it? i know that's hard, but, that's what you gotta do. when I get printer ink (bc. a hoe does NOT like buying printer ink) im printing out that fucking 8 mile long hate message I got sent. but also that's just the kinda person I am. like people being a dick and stealing my posts and telling me to swallow a glock 9mm doesn't upset me, im more like,, confused more than anything because never in my life have I ever sent hate to anyone. also I have had this "I do not care because you're some loser on the internet and you being an ass wipe is no where near as bad as the shit people have done to me irl" attitude.

TLDR; i dont think youre doing anything wrong because I don't exactly know what I'm doing right. i just... do... and sometimes, "just doing" is enough. maybe its luck, maybe I've been blessed by the tumblr algorithm and I've somehow figured it out, or maybe the community is just genuinely that bad and they pick favorites. maybe its all of the above! who knows. i try not to worry about it. i think at the end of the day, as long as you're having fun posting about your f/os and selfshipping, that's what matters.

alright thats all see ya. if you have any more questions feel free to ask however I fear I cannot answer them </3

[payaso-gomi]

Oh yeah I'm doinng a little Danny Phantom rewrite for fun! I love the show, I just wanna see how I'd go about something because I dunno Ghost Boy story sounds fun

You can read my character ramblings under the cut 💖💖

Danny's been a bit hard, I just don't know what to do with him. He did go through quite a rewrite in my head too, I like him in the show and all I just think he's different to how I would have approached him. Teenage boy dies and comes back Different is such a interesting concept and I wanted to try that out. I'd definitely make the trans thing much more of a Thing, make it a Straight Up thing. I think his story would be mostly about finding out who he is, qhich is lowkey what the show's about. More religious imagery and talking though, lmao. He might get renamed altogether, he looks like a Quinn to me idk

Tucker's been the hardest to do something I have fun with because I never really connected with his character in the show. I see this Tucker as a bit of a obssessor, an otaku if you will. He's a shut in, really really good at video games (rythm and RPGs particularly), he listens to a lot of very different electronic music (buddy's not ready for puggnb, he'd love that stuff). If he's interested in something he'll learn everything about it and buy way too much merch (or make it if he has to, Sam planted a DIY worm in him). He has a lot of fictional crushes, most of the anime girls (and a few boys but he's still deeply in the closet here). His main fixation is technology, particularly computer parts and all the stuff involved with that. When he was little he was known for breaking calculators or whatever gadgets and devices he could because he liked to see how they were made. he later learned to disassemble them without breaking them lmao)

Sam's been the easiest, I understand her character the most tbh. I know a couple of people who are very invested in political and social movements and tbh making her a little too focused on that stuff is interesting (and. Potentially funny). Maybe she takes things too seriously, and ends ip getting herself in trouble. Would focus a lot on her relationship with her family (her mom, specifically). She's super super diy, most of her clothes are thrifted. she has the money for new stuff but refuses (or can't for the most part. She does spend her money on music and has a very impressive CD catalog. She would dilute her style a lot more around her family because as much as she's a punk queen, she doesn't want to hear her family's comments on her clothing and her messy makeup. Sticks and stones and all that but it does hurt to hear someone you're close to negatively comment on something you care about

[subarashiihibi]

my thing about izaya is that he's so strange and weird and i love that so much. i didn't want to ramble too much in the notes of that poor person's post but i find the way he speaks and the words he chooses so interesting so let me ramble a little bit. this may or may not even be coherent so bear with me here im just going to speak my thoughts.

ok this got really fucking long and all over the 0place so im putting this under a read more sorry.

so i have volume 9 of the novel in both english and japanese. i only have two novels in japanese and that is this one and yuuyake wo. so i'm pretty crazy about this izaya speech analysis shit. anyways i was rereading thru the jp ver the other day just to compare it to the eng and i kinda realized that like.

a lot of people you can separate their speech in either formal and informal speech right? someone like shizuo speaks really informally and uses a lot of rough, dragged-out versions of words and stuff (しゃーねえ vs しょうがない) and then someone like shinra who speaks in a ton of yojijukugo and generally sounds like a nerd emoji gijinka.

izaya on the other hand rly... doesn't fit in either? i mean sure he sounds like another nerd emoji gijinka but it's kinda different. it's not so much the words he speaks but rather the intonation and his tone...

and he has his moments where he speaks pretty seriously and whatnot of course, but in general he just... doesn't sound very human when he speaks? i don't know if that's a conscious effort or not. is it his attempts at distancing himself from his own individual humanity? or is it just because he's a weird guy? i dunno. but it's interesting nonetheless.

one thing i will note though is that despite his somewhat inhuman speech patterns, it's also pretty...dramatic? to the extent where it's really exaggerated but also very cute and charming. (this part is important.)

i think a lot of what makes izaya's speech so weirdly inhuman is because he doesn't really use a lot of slang or similar lingo that people his age would typically use. i know mikado said in the novels that he doesn't really try to fit in with his age group's fashion sense either so it makes sense but still. he's like an old hag it's so funny. and it's because of that that when he says stuff like 'i don't get all hot and heavy over headless women' or whatever he said to celty it's really amusing to me because like... why is the strange man saying this?💀

another example i kinda giggled about on my twitter when i read it it's not even crazy and i sound corny and cheesy and stupid but theres this scene in vol 9 where izaya messages celty for business and hold on let me just put it as a quote.

he sounds so old saying 'video game' like 😭 idk it's just funny cause he barely even knows anything abt games like bro knows nothing im crying

in the jp hes like 「…ゲーム中なのかい？」 and then when celty tries to explain herself he says 「何��言ってるのか、良く解らないんだけど」 and im rly bad at tling parts of sentences and stuff but just know that the way he words it makes it sound like this gif to me

i love both versions i think the original jp makes him sound like hes so lost and confused (hence why pw gif cause lord that man always looks lost LMFAOOOO) and then eng tl just blunt ass "I don't know what you're talking about." makes him sound like full on hag 😭😭😭

OMFG WAIT I HAVE TO MENTION THIS FUCKING SCENE WITH SHINRA ITS SO FUNNY.

first i think it's funny the translation has izaya say fuck here cause he very rarely swears and i did read this one thing about how he only swears when his mask slips so to me this is like genuine bewilderment that he cant even hide LOL. second why is he so excited to hear about 'whatever sexual fetish' shinra has im crying he's so damn nosy . okay but this is not the funniest part let me add that now.

???

ehy the hell is izaya orihara talking about foot fetishes???😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 im crying bruh i was so flabbergasted when i read this i was like WHAT did he just say? he says it in the jp ver too which just makes it even funnier. this goes back to what i said earlier but i always get so amused when izaya has something to say about sex or whatever cause he's so fucking weird and unsettling why does he know that

(i mean i also get so hard i nearly pass out thinking about izaya tlaking about sex but thats probably just a thing with my heart condition and stuff)

oh also another scene i think is really cute and amusing and funny is back when shinra was first still trying to get izaya to form the bio club w him.

1. shinra is funny as fuck in this scene but also izaya's "Hmm. Can I punch you?" made me havbe a good laugh. in the jp he says 「んー。殴ってもいいのかな？」 which is pretty much the same thing just with the intonation of like 'hmmmmmmmmm should i hit u or not...' sorry like i said im just bad w explaining this stuff. but i felt the need to point it out not cause im one of those annoying ppl who praise the original jp ver and reject translations and localizations i just think it's important for izaya specifically cause i love him and i want to analyze his speech patterns as best as i can.

i was going thru the novel just now for other stuff i wanted to mention and i forgot abt this part but it's so funny.

'Let's not get hasty. Type calmly, please.' its not even funny or nothing i just find it so amusinf whenever he talks like that💀 i will say though the english translation kind of makes him sound more weird and inhuman than the original. that line in the original was basically just him telling her she needs to calm down enough to at least type properly LOL. idk if im just being nitpicky cause this is izaya tho so feel free to ignore that. fwiw i like the eng tl bc while it's a different intonation than the original japanese ver i think if he did speak english it would probably sound smth like that anyways.

this too made me laugh like ??? seriously he is really nosy when it comes to people's intimate affairs. in the jp ver he calls them an 'intimate couple' which just is like .. ok bro💀

does anyone else see my vision of izaya getting cucked by celty (does it count as cucking when celtys the one dating shinra) while he looks sad and pathetic and miserable that he never decided to shoot his shot w shinra back in the day

if i were commenting on the actual stuff going on in this scene rn this post would be a lot olonger and even more terribly all over the place so im just gonna focus on how i think it's funny izaya says 'easy, man...' this is like one of the only times his words are somewhat natural and sound like smth you would hear someone else say. in the jp ver it's 「おいおい…」 which is somewhat less out of left field in terms of coming from izaya but still it's pretty surprisingly normal. i have to wonder if in that moment he's too worried about shinra to care about keeping up appearances.

this is just random and me making fun of izaya as usual but why the hell does he weigh himself after his showers💀💀💀 it's cute and endearing and only adds to his strong gap moe but still... it's strange...

speaking of cute things this is from a volume i forget but he says this one phrase a couple of times and it is just both really cute and also kind of idk... saddening. one of the times i can remember he says it is when namie was making fun of him or something and he replies 'Don't tease me. I'm only human.' or something along those lines and it's like . hm. ok.

i think it's cute he says 'dont tease me' a few times cause eughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (trying to ward off severe brain damaged incoherent thoughts) but 'im only human' is like... are you really? even after you try so hard to escape your own humanity and individual self so much... im going to try and give my thoughts on it here but this is just based off my hc that izaya has bpd so yanno. im basing a lot oif this on my own experiences sorry. i do that a lot. (gestures over to all the posts i make abt fob/mychem fan izaya)

when it comes to just straight up acknowledging his humanity izaya has no problems with this because 'sure, i'm human. isn't that obvious?' is probably something along the lines of what he thinks. it's easy for him to just say that because it's just that. it's just words. it holds no real meaning and shows no true insight into how he actually perceives himself. but when it comes to actually having to come face to face with his own humanity and the fact that yes, he is only human, it's a lot more difficult because now it's out of his control. i wonder also if he has problems with perceiving his own self.

i say this a lot but i truly do believe izaya is so so so beautiful and i love him so much. also i just saw a funny post on twitter so i wanna say this here idk if yall know this but izayas actually a latina hes got chismosavirus❤ ok thats all i have to say sorry for rambling so much

[goron-king-darunia]

Eggtober Recap and Masterpost 2023

Untitled Egg Poem Egg Yolk Splattered in a chipped bowl, Limitless potential Broken like the dawn.

Scared of wasted sunrise, Scared of loving white lies, Yearning, Wanting to breathe free.

Prison within a prison, Living without living, I am spinning, toiling, burning, Breaking, sifting, praying, learning, Nothing blooming Nothing growing Tears.

Crackling insanity, A song that boils within me A rhythm Setting me in stone.

And I'll claw in Like dandelions, Vines, like yeast and mold I'll make a mark one day, you'll see.

Rooted, I'll grow my thorns, It's not my fault for being born, Sorry if My laughter is too loud.

I'll make a reverie of mechanical monotony No more apologies Just me. Insects and wriggling larvae, Eggshell like lead paint chips, Star dust doesn't choose its shape.

Pigment from wilted roses, blood spilled by mistake, I refuse to ever break.

Not again.

Eggtober is over. We did it~ The poem doesn't really speak to a current state of mind. Just a pattern of maladaptive thinking I grew up having, being the weird kid. People like the rough edges a lot more when you grow up, I've found. Makes you interesting. Or maybe it's just easier to find your people when you're unapologetically strange online. And I like that Eggtober sort of embraces that. It's not a super serious Inktober challenge. Just a bunch of weird people drawing weird eggs. And I mean that in the best way. People expect there to be a "why" a lot. "Why eggs?" And sometimes there is a why. Sometimes I draw eggs to express something or to symbolize something. But sometimes there is no why. Sometimes it's just because an egg is easy or fun or comfortable. Sometimes an egg just feels right. Sometimes it's just to make something. Doesn't have to be poetic or meaningful. Sometimes you just draw an egg, and that's all it is. And I think a lot of discomfort around art is that everyone expects there to be a why, and if you don't have a why, then your art doesn't deserve to be seen. "Why do you like gorey stuff, kinky stuff, weird stuff? If you can't explain, I'm choosing to believe you're a freak and should be disallowed from creating." And I'm lucky, I think, to not be that popular. I don't get asked these sorts of things. But I see it happen to other people. And sometimes I get it. An answer to the why pacifies. I get uneasy with horror the same as everyone and I pacify it by reading the wiki and learning the secrets and understanding the why. But I think we need to get more comfy making up our own why, or get comfy with the knowledge that sometimes there isn't a why. Sometimes the little brain goblin decides there is no why. They just like the weird little eggs. And that's okay. And I think the reason we make up for other peoples' "why" should maybe stop being "because they're a weird little freak that likes degenerate things." Because yeah, maybe they are. But it's not a bad thing. And the world is a lot more interesting when we accept that we don't always know the why. And the why isn't always as simple as that.

I dunno. I'm rambling a bit. But I'm grateful to everyone that showed up and participated and shared and liked and just... enjoyed existing where the thing happening was lots of eggs and the "why" was just "why not?"

Hoping every one of you has a nice glass of your preferred warm beverage and stays nice and toasty for the rest of the year. (Shout out to the southern hemisphere folks if there are any. May you guys have an iced beverage of your choice and stay nice and cool for the rest of the year.)

Lots of thoughts about Eggtober 2023 and no good way to articulate them, but suffice it to say that having a loose amount of structure like this is very good on my garbage ADHD brain. If anything in the collage catches your fancy, here's the posts in order from the top left to the bottom right. May the rest of 2023 be sweet. I can't wait to see everyone again next year! And don't eat too much Halloween Candy at once, even if it is those yummy gummy fried egg candies.

Eggtober 2023 Posts in Order: (Unfortunately I didn't learn about the speedpaint feature until day 6 😢)

Eggtober 1st: Fried Egg on Green Eggtober 2nd: Lemon Fried Egg (Both Versions) Eggtober 3rd: Fried Egg Cake

Eggtober 4th: Poached Eggs and Asparagus Hollandaise Eggtober 5th: Sheet Pan Fried Eggs Eggtober 6th: Raw Egg (Both Versions)

Eggtober 7th: Painted Egg Eggtober 8th: Rice Crispy Eggs Eggtober 9th: Chocolate Souffle Eggtober 10th: Hot and Sour Soup

Eggtober 11th: Flan Eggtober 12th: Fried Eggs and Bacon Eggtober 13th: Ramen Eggs Eggtober 14th: Tiger Skin Egg

Eggtober 15th: Fried Egg with Berries Eggtober 16th: Cheesy Baked Cream Eggs Eggtober 17th: Mushroom Quiche Eggtober 18th: Cipriani Cake

Eggtober 19th: Pavlova with Strawberry Jam Eggtober 20th: Deviled Egg Eggtober 21st: Hard-boiled Egg and Mayo Eggtober 22nd: Scrambled Eggs with Cheese

Eggtober 23rd: Omurice Eggtober 24th: Shrimp Fried Rice Eggtober 25th: Uovo in Raviolo Eggtober 26th: Image of Fried Egg on Jack-o-lantern.

Eggtober 27th: Tea Egg Eggtober Eggtober 28th: Monster Eggs Eggtober 29th: Korean Egg Bread Eggtober 30th: Fried Egg on Magenta in the Stlye of @quezify

Eggtober 31st: Fried Egg on Burger Eggtober 31st Bonus: Egg Creature from SNOBBISM

Special thanks to my bae, @actualaster for the love and support, @hannikka for the encouraging words, @lady-quen for the ongoing collab, and @quezify for being the best host. Love you all! I am putting the King Sized Reese's and KitKat candy bars in your metaphorical Halloween bags.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Funny how just 5 years later it's finally downing on me that Louis can get his tongue cut– that if he does, he'll *never* speak again. And how much he probably thinks about all the times everyone told him they wished he'd shut up, how annoying he was, how his jokes are stupid, his singing sucks, etcetera etcetera. Not just him, I wonder how guilty everyone feels about saying all that stuff.

For the others, does he resent them? And for him, are they glad? Is there a part in all of them that think 'finally'?

And it's taken me this long to try and assimilate just how absolutely horrifying the situation actually is. we don't know how they did it but we can imagine, and it's not pretty. It's mutilation- pure torture. I know it's a videogame or whatever but everytime I think of Louis in that cell, dried blood running down his mouth and all the way down his chest, I feel sick, genuinely sick.

I was reading one of your old fics yesterday and it got me thinking, that's why Im rambling here on your asks. But yeah, no-tongue Louis should be non existent and considered a crime or something

Oh yeah, it's rough. It's brutal. I hate it.

I've only let Louis get captured a handful of times in all the years I've played TFS because 1. I'm clouis trash and I need them to be happy together in the end no matter the cost, and 2. I cannot handle Louis in the cells, I can't. He's my favorite character in all of TWDG, I don't want that to happen to him especially when I know I have the power to prevent it.

To be honest, I tend to pretend that outcome just doesn't exist. If I ignore it, it can't hurt me haha.

Don't get me wrong, I like a dose of angst in my fiction. I like tragedies. I like symbolic downfalls. I like recovery arcs. There's a lot of potential with the route where Louis isn't saved and he loses his tongue...

...But Louis is in a special category of characters where I'm like, "No, fuck you, he gets to survive and be happy! He gets to be understood! He gets to be loved!"

I think a lot of feelings come from it being a consequence of choice, too, y'know? Louis losing his tongue is only one outcome, one you can prevent. It all depends on who you save at the end of ep2. It's on you, and you can try to be like "noooo shut up, it's actually Louis' fault he got his tongue cut out because he wouldn't shut up!" when it's your fault he got taken in the first place, like... that's the game. Your choices have consequences and you can deny or justify them all you want... but in the end, you did it. You started the butterfly effect with your decision.

I also think this is why people get heated in fandom debates because "how could you NOT save Louis knowing he gets his tongue cut out, you monster!?"

I dunno, how can you not save Violet knowing that you'll find her blind on the beach? You monster?

Both outcomes are bad, it's just up to the player on which they feel is "better" or "worse."

We justify it to ourselves. We defend our choices. But that makes the choice all the more powerful, no? I save Louis knowing what fate Violet will meet. I trust AJ knowing Tenn will die on the bridge. I save Louis every time because in a game series where most of my favorite characters don't get happy endings [because they're fucking dead], I'll do everything I can to make sure Louis gets one.

I can handle an outcome with blinded Violet. As bad as it sounds, I can stomach that. I can find some hope in a recovery arc for her, and I can deal with her and Clementine having a rockier relationship after everything that happened on the boat. I can take comfort in the idea that Violet's going to survive with the help of people who care about her.

I can live with Tenn's death. It sucks, it hurts, it's bullshit... but I can live with it.

I can't handle Louis losing his tongue. There is no stomaching that for me, y'know? He's such a crucial part of Clementine and AJ's story for me that I can't fathom her not saving him in that moment during the raid, just as I can't fathom Louis without his tongue.

[chaifootsteps]

Maybe I'm misremembering (several disorders that cause memory issues will do that to you) but didn't you. Make a post that addressed the things everyone on Twitter is upset about now? Like, *you* brought this stuff up, talked about it openly, but they're treating it like it was this shocking, big secret. Did I miss something? Or is it really as simple as people (as per usual) not really paying attention to where/when/how the information they're using is coming to light?

Maybe because of how long I've been in fandom spaces (been ten years! A whole decade!) I've sort of learned to check who exactly I'm getting information from, but I guess no one else really... Learned to do that? I swear, this sudden implosion wouldn't have been happening if people just... Paid attention.

Sorry if this is rambling at all, I'm just... Baffled. I haven't even been sticking around your blog that long (roughly 2-3 months? Maybe longer) but the stuff everyone's getting up in arms about has been *known* to me. I thought everyone else *also* knew this. I've sent a few asks by now, so I've been around the block here.

Anyways. Long ask, hope you don't mind, but it seems you get a lot of long asks. I may dislike some of the things you ship, but... I dunno. I used to ship ZaDr when I was, what, eight or nine? And I'd be willing to bet some of the people up in arms with you right now also have a few skeletons in their closet, so I'm not putting much stock in the moral high ground they're touting. Just... Hang in there, weather the storm. I know you say you're tough and all that, but a little encouragement never hurt anyone.

It's pretty baffling, and your guess is as good as mine. It's like no, I've never been (or wanted to be) the place in the Viv critical world you go to talk about Viv's bathtub snakes like they're the worst thing she's ever done. That's down the hall and to the right. I'm the unrepentant monsterfucker who's good at keeping receipts and secrets, and have periodically defended Viv's weirder fictional tastes because I don't think they're that big of a deal.

Guarantee you the people up in arms about me have skeletons in their own closets, and not even well-hidden ones. Norry likes Beetlebabes, noncon, and Pentious's feral snake dongs. Artsy's got not one, but two callout videos. I just had someone quote retweet me calling me weird, and then their timeline was full of half-nude, humanized Mickey Mouse art, complete with treasure trail.

Thanks for the encouragement. Would you believe that this isn't the worst rodeo I've endured?

[amethystfairy1]

I absolutely adore your worldbuilding, it’s not overwhelming and feels natural and smooth, how do you do it??? I struggle a lot with worldbuilding so do you have any tips? It always ends up feeling clunky whenever I try to include information about the world when writing (I think I have a problem with oversharing in my stories…)

HELLOOOO ✨

I'm so glad you enjoy my worldbuilding!!! Oooo this is actually such a cool question I love it lemme think lemme think...

Ok, to avoid feeling clunky or oversharing, I think one of the best pieces of advice I can give is to only discuss what would be relevant to the characters in the moment. That's how you keep things feeling natural and smooth instead of looking like an exposition dump.

Let's take our fiery boy Tango in TTSBC for example!

When Tango is having a moment with his abandonment issues (poor boy) he is going to consider why he feels that way. He feels that way because his Pyre abandoned him at ten years old for his weakness.

Why? Well, Tango knows! And he's gonna tell you about it in his POV!

It makes perfect sense to have him thinking about that and running those facts around in his head because he's hurting. So I use this moment to explain what blaze-born Pyres are, how they work, why they kicked him out, and how they fit into the under-city as a whole...and it doesn't feel clunky, because of course Tango would be thinking about blaze-born Pyres, it's because of his Pyre that he has these abandonment issues! It's just apart of the story, it's relevant info! What I would avoid from this point is going to deep into, like, how the Cat Clans work from here, because that's not relevant to Tango...maybe he'd give like a passing anecdote about them, and if he does I try to make sure I connect it to why he knows this info.

Why would he know about Cat Clans? He's good friends with Lizzie! Ok, so I'll throw in something like...

"Lizzie had told Tango, once, that Cat clans weren't the same as Pyres. Located within the mid-levels and more interconnected with the main cavern of the under-city, they valued their own, and were protective of their young...Tango had tried to keep down a sting of jealousy when she was talking about it. Her clan had loved her. Kept her. Raised her to be strong and what had Tango's pyre done? Thrown him away."

So there's a little worldbuilding about cat clans kinda just mixed in with Tango's angst train with his thoughts on his Pyre, but because he's comparing the Cat Clans to the Blaze-born Pyres, it still fits and makes sense...like, it's something that would fit in his POV

I dunno if I'm making sense I feel like I'm rambling but this is fun so I'll keep going 😆

Another good thing to do is try to set up situations where a character needs to have something explained to them! Of course, this can get overused and feel clunky if you're not careful, but in an AU like TTSBC where by the point of the story half the characters are left in the dark about a lot of stuff (ZED 😭) then it makes sense that they would have stuff explained to them!

OH OH OH ALSO!

For environmental stuff keep in mind what the character whose POV you are in would notice! For example, when I write from Jimmy's POV he always notices the weather! If the sky is blue, or overcast, if it's sunny or looks like rain, because the sky is so important to him. From Scott's POV, he doesn't notice things like that often, but he does notice what people around him look like in more detail because he's very attuned to reading people by their ticks. From Scott's POV things like tilts of the head or shifts of the eyes show up a lot more than Jimmy's, but in Jimmy's POV you're sure as hell gonna know what the forecast is 😆 Does that make sense?

This was so much fun! I never really thought to hard about how I write from a worldbuilding perspective so having a think on it and trying to explain it was super cool! I hope this helped some! 💖

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Personality through quote

Thanks to @elsie-writes here and here and @leahnardo-da-veggie here!

Rules: have your OCs respond to a given prompt then give the people you tagged a prompt

Got long, below the cut :)

[A quote about feelings]

Lexi: "I have a lot of feelings...they all are pretty intense. Every emotion is like that for me. When I'm happy, I'm ecstatic, exhilarated. When I'm sad, it's like I'm depressed. I get just a little stressed and my anxiety flares up, and I start crying. It's a lot, honestly."

Maddie: "Feelings are fine and cool, I guess. I like my feelings toward Lexi and Kelsey. Don't really like my feelings toward someone like Brycen. Not sure how I feel for others, though. They like me, which is cool. I dunno. Feelings are super weird."

Ash: "I think I'm starting to understand feelings of others better now that I've discovered my telepathy. It's interesting, seeing how I experience other's emotions. It gets a little metaphorical. Fascinating stuff."

Gwen: "I mean, Lexi was once upset and I was sent to comfort her because I was apparently the most empathetic there. I'd say I'm in touch with my emotions. I get a little too emotional at times. I hold back a lot more than people think, though."

Robbie: "Dude, feelings are kinda dope. Like our brain just feels sad and our chest physically hurts. Doctors can't explain it. [Pause] Okay, both of my parents are doctors and they kinda can, but it's cool regardless."

Akash: "Huh. Well, it's important to feel feelings, and it took me a while to face them. I'm good now, though. I think it's important to face them."

Jedi: [silent for too long] "Well, *rubs back of neck* "I like to...think of myself as someone in touch with his own emotions...."...*nods*

Carmen: "No."

[A quote about their thoughts on NFTs and/or cryptocurrency]

None of these guys would like it but this is a fun prompt!

Lexi: "Isn't crypto a scam? I don't like the idea of that. Just stick to regular money."

Maddie: "NFTs don't make any sense. Just right-click the image. Downloaded."

Ash: "Honestly, I feel like owning an image sounds fun in a silly way, but I'm not that reckless with my money. Would rather spend it on tangible things."

Gwen: "I'm uncomfortable with the idea of people charging you to own an image, fake money or not. I mean, why not make actual art?"

Robbie: "Oh my God did you see the NFT ape movie? Dude, it's so bad. I can't believe there are people this stupid."

Akash: "Not only is it unethical, it literally makes no sense. The money isn't real? Why would you do that? Like, have you looked at the value of crypto?"

Jedi: [intently listening to someone explain crypto and NFTs] "Well, now that is just ridiculous. How in the world do they expect to regulate that?" [A few more minutes of baffled rambling]

Carmen: [also had to have someone explain it to her, but she interrupted more] "Are you kidding me?! Is stupidity a common genetic trait among Ceters?!" [More ranting]

[A quote about remembering the ones they lost]

Well uh I'm not gonna go into any major spoilers so I'm gonna expand the meaning to more than just death.

Um, gradually gets sadder because my first few have not experienced their main trauma yet >:)

Lexi: "Oh, I had so many friends in elementary school! I mean, I still have a lot of friends, but I miss those who went off to different intermediate schools. It's okay, though! I found them on social media, and a couple had phones by fifth grade. I should totally hook up with them again! Thanks for asking!!"

Maddie: "I guess Brycen. He was my friend before he became a jerk. I would like to be friends with him again. Like, then him before he was a jerk."

Ash: "I miss the friendship I had with Shelby. I don't know why, it was literally only for a week or two. But there was...something about her friendship that sucked me in. I still have Lexi, so I think I'll be okay. Then there's my ex-stepdad, Frank. He was sometimes fun. Toward the end he became rude. Before that, though. I miss when I felt like he was a dad, I guess."

Gwen: "My grandfather died when I was very young. He was amazing, though, and I am just glad I remember him. He read stories to me and played with me. And then there's my cat, who we lost a few months ago. She was really sick. I still miss her."

Robbie: "God, I miss Lalika, Akash's mom. She was basically a second mom to me. I talked so fast around her as a kid. She was just starting to learn English when we met, so I don't know if she got everything, but she would always smile and laugh when I did, paying attention to my emotions so she could respond appropriately. But I also loved to read aloud my favorite books to her, so I helped in that regard I guess. She went to all my plays. She made sure to get something for my birthday, and Sam's, separate from Akash's gift. She was amazing."

Akash: "My mom. Every day, I miss her. It's...hard to move past it, I guess. She would listen to you. I still remember her songs that she'd sing, and I still listen to them. She loved taking pictures and filming everything, which I am so grateful for now. She fought for me, when the school district dug their heels in about something. Made sure I had everything I needed to succeed. She was the best."

Jedi: "My mother fought for me my entire life. She pushed to get me an accelerated academic program, fought to drag me and my sister to a better place where I could thrive. Fought my father when he...let us say, went too far. She was fiercely protective. I owe her my life. I just wish I could have repaid her."

Carmen: *scoffs* "I knew Atsila my whole life. Why wouldn't I miss her?" [Yeah sorry that's all you're getting out of her]

Tagging @dyrewrites @ceph-the-ghost-writer @elsie-writes @mk-writes-stuff @aalinaaaaaa @sam-glade @thebejeweledwatercat @winterandwords @mysticstarlightduck @somethingclevermahogony + anyone else ;)

Prompt: A quote about a weird habit they/someone else has.

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites