#I dont even get off today i get off tomorrow morning because i said yes to a extra shifts weeks ago. Also it starts one hour earlier.

[what-does-the-moose-say]

Weather and mood so bad lately I consider putting up christmas decorations and watching christmas movies. See if that changes anything.

[angelliicc]

rush

“nine to nine, you're on my mind all day

you're my world and my sweet escape”

masterlist

a/n: HI GUYS! editor ❌ writer ✅ no fic coming tomorrow or thursday :( sorry. also i almost fell asleep writing this but i drank celsius lol, enjoy!!

warnings: not proofread, fluff, tension

| your phone buzzed with a notification. your phone had been quite dry, but whenever you get a notification you answer it immediately. it was from instagram.

message request from: ellie 💫 accept it?

“hm, whos this?” you thought. no person had dmed you out of the blue before. only close friends and family. “sure, why not?”

after accepting the request, you see the message she left for you.

“hey :)”

you respond back. “hiii”

e: “i dmed you because i saw we have a lot of interests in common, hope you dont mind.”

you needed new mutuals to talk about the same shit you liked, only a handful of people at your school, but they were mostly older.

r: “oh dont worry, i dont mind. so you like the same things as me mostly?”

e: “unless there’s something i dont know about, than yes”

“shes kinda funny” you thought.

r: “lol, i like music, clothes, painting, shopping, sports, all that shit.”

e: “i like sports also, what do you watch?”

r: “basketball, loved it since i was 5”

e: “damn thats for a long ass time. i tried it but its ehh not for me.”

r: “well what do you watch or play?”

e: “soccer, i play and watch.”

r: “nicee. i want to play soccer, but i don’t know how to play lol.”

e: “maybe i can teach you one day.”

shes bold, but you had no complaints about it.

you saw in her bio, she lived in the same area as you. you decided to ask her if you’d like to meet up and get some coffee. you had nothing to do this weekend and wanted to get out of the house anyway.

r: “hey, i saw you’re in the bay? you mind if you wanna get coffee and chat? get to know each other more?”

you pressed send before even thinking twice. “fuck fuck fuck why did i do that? she must think im so annoy-“ until you felt a buzz.

e: “sure, id like that.”

a smile grew on your face.

the next morning you woke up, went to the bathroom to do your 5 step skin care routine. while waiting for your skin to dry, you decided to pick out an outfit. the weather was partly cloudy, so you picked out a pink sweater, a white tank top, and some jeans. you changed, then applied your makeup, making sure everything was going perfect. you did your eyeshadow a baby pink color, with some glitter on the center of your eyelids.

the cafe was around 5 minutes away from your house, so you decided to walk. it was a good dose of vitamin D, and you needed some fresh air.

when you get there, you see her sitting in a chair. she has auburn hair in a mullet, green eyes and freckles on her face. she was wearing sweats, a compression shirt with a button-up short sleeve shirt on top.

you smiled as you sat down, placing your tote bag down. “hi!”

“hey, you look nice.” she replied. the comment caught you off guard, making you immediately flustered.

“thank you.” you said back “you look nice too. wanna order anything? its on me don’t worry.”

“nono i got it, thank you for the offer.” you and ellie went up to the counter placing your orders. ellie ordered an iced americano with a marble cake. you weren’t really hungry, so you just ordered a matcha.

you both sat down at the table and started talking. you both talked like it was your last day on earth. you told each other your personal lives, schooling, etc.

you both talked so much that you guys lost track of time. before you knew it, the sun was starting to set. “wanna see the sunset? lets see if it has pretty colors today.” she asked.

“yess, i love sunsets.” you said. you got your bag, and headed out the door with her. you decided to walk to the local park and watch the sunset.

you both sat down on the grass, enjoying the view. a random wave of drowsiness hit you. before you knew it, your head was on ellies shoulder and you were out like a light.

15 minutes later you wake up from her shoulder, still at the park. the sun had fully set, and you realized what had happened.

“im so sorry, i didn’t mean to.” you said.

“dont worry, i kinda enjoyed it actually.” ellie replied back, soothing your worries.

“yup, shes still bold.” you thought. “this was fun ellie. im gonna head home now, we should do this again sometime.” you told her enthusiastically.

“me too, this was very nice. see you again sometime soon.” she replied.

before you went to bed, you got another message from her.

“goodnight.” ellie said

“goodnight.” you replied back

the next morning, you were bombarded with texts. and you liked it.

for the next 3 days, you both were talking from sun up to sun down, never getting bored. you noticed ellie was being bold and flirting with you. “two can play that game.” you thought to yourself.

e: “i missed you these past couple of days.”

r: “oh really? how bad did you miss me.”

e: “i missed you so much i couldnt stop thinking about you. you’re so beautiful.”

r: “you really have a way with words, yk that right?”

e: “maybe.”

r: “since when are you the flirty type?”

e: “ive always been. why? too much to handle?”

r: “no, i like it. its cute from you.”

e: “when you slept on my shoulder by accident the other day, you had me nervous. in a good way. i wish you just stayed there forever”

r: “its just my touch i have on people. if you miss me so much come over.”

e: “omw.”

10 minutes later, the doorbell rang. you felt a rush of excitement.

you answered the doorbell, seeing her leaning on the doorframe. “did you fly down the highway?” you asked sarcastically. “thats only something i know.” she replied

you both went to your bedroom. it was pink with green vines and fairy lights. cds and posters spread according to match the aesthetic.

you sat on the floor, and ellie sat down on your bed, lying down to your plushies then eventually getting up.

“you’re the only thing ive been thinking about lately.” she started

“is that so? do i make you feel special?” you respond

“i wont lie, you kinda do. everything about you. i love all of it. your eyes, your hair, your style.” she spoke, all saying this while running her fingers through your hair. you felt like you falling, your heart was racing and your stomach was doing flips.

you got up off the floor and sat on the bed. she placed her hand on your knee and started doing circles with her thumbs, letting you get tingles all over your body. you both look at each other, and didnt break eye contact. you were getting nervous, so you started blushing and immediately turned away in embarrassment. “hey!” she said in a playful tone. you both eventually held hands while looking at each others eyes.

“no ones made me feel like this before” you told her.

“good, then let me be the first.” she spoke.

when you looked down she touched your face and kissed your cheek. you felt satisfied, and your whole face felt red. her soft kisses on your skin felt so relaxing. the feelings you both have kept hidden from the moment you say each other were about to become transparent.

the tension between you both was louder than any words ever spoken before. you both looked at each others lips, and started kissing, becoming drunk in each other. her taste of love was so special and sweet. so sweet that it made you dizzy. you felt like a spell was casted upon the both of you, like you could stay up all night, and never be tired. love felt so easy in that moment, and it made you want more of her. you both couldn’t get enough of each other, wanting to feel each others rush.

the touch of each other made it seemed like it lasted forever. she pulled away from your lips.

“can i be your girlfriend?” she asked you.

fuck, she did have a way of her words. the words themselves can make you levitate from the thoughts of her.

“you dont know how long ive been waiting for that question.” you told her. “absolutely.”

just as you were running out of love, you found the person you needed the most.

hours and hours what do I do now? baby

with no clue, i need you quickly

i need to feel your rush, drive me crazy and I know

i just can't get enough.

[sethredia]

straight up i think period-induced anxiety is the worst. like i have gad so im already anxious constantly but it normally settles at a not-great-but-manageable background hum if that makes sense? but when im on my period that shit goes from like a casual 4/10 to a fucking 14/10 sometimes.

ill be already a lil spooked about x or y thing on a normal day but when im on my period? i cant fucking sleep because im thinking about it and my chest is getting tight and i can feel my heart rate kick up and i roll over and get on my phone to distract myself and yet i know im distracting myself so the distraction doesnt really work and on and on until its three am and i pass tf out

its more manageable when im at work, right, because theres Stuff To Do at work. there a Job Tasks and then Job Distractions which are, in their own way, a different form of job task to me. is it the same fanfic i opened the night before to read but couldnt get through because my stupid, chemical deficient, hormone-addled brain wont let me focus on it? yes. is it different now because im at work and work is an entirely different vibe so now i can get through that story (and maybe a few others depending on length)? also yes!

anxiety example: my boss texted me last night, or i guess now that its gone past midnight would it be the night before last?, and said (frankly very ominously? like even without the anxiety disorder it would be spooky methinks) “call me before you go in tomorrow” and i was like “oh shit oh fuck what did i do i dont think i did anything i mean i had a weird hiccup with counting the drawer out at the end of the shift because i was doing 18.50 in my head instead if 17.50 so i had an overhang of a dollar and so maybe me messing with the dollar while i was trying to figure out what happened showed up and looked weird on the cameras and she saw it and she wants to talk to me about it???” and so that morning i did all my get-ready things and went back into my room, grabbed one of my stuffies for emotional support in the same way i do to make dentist appoints and shit, and bravely called my boss

and then. she said she just wanted to check on if it would be safe to have us open the store because of the snow that night. she lives in the next town over where it snowed a lot (7.5 inches. she stuck a ruler in it and sent me a picture later lol) and wanted to check on road conditions and just a general vibe on it f whether people would be out and about (it snowed in my town 3 inches. if im being generous. most of it melted off before noon. according to my boss, it continued to try and snow where she was on and off all day. what a wild difference like ten miles does to the weather!).

i got so so so scared over like a dollar worth of figured out before i left the building confusion that my boss wanting to just. be a good person. was like nowhere in my thought process.

related but only slightly: i got freaked tf out over one singular dollar and had that shit figured out before i went home for the day, whereas my stupid fucking coworker who is like technically my manager (i think if i had to put a title on her it would be like assistant manager but idk she doesnt have a title on our work schedule but shes above all the team lead kids but i also am that but i know technically shes my boss and she makes ~a dollar/hour more~ than i do so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ) ALWAYS fucks up the drawers somehow. like our manager wants the end count on the drawer to be between $149.50-150.50. Why there is dont know but thats how it goes right? WRONG. every single time i come in and have to open a drawer after this lunatic has closed the night before, the drawers are over $150.50. it is not hard to stick another dollar into your bundle. drop the extra dollar. the drawer should not be at $150.75. drop the dollar. put it at $149.75 please god. this happened today on both drawers (small store; we only have two registers and only have shift overlaps on weekends and evenings so it works).

what Also happened today was that we have little paper slips that go into the drawers so you know what amount theyre supposed to be tallying out to when you count them next to know if everything is good or not. the paper said $150.65. i counted that fucker like six times, did the math on two different calculators three times to make sure it wasn’t me mis-hitting a decimal or something, and discovered it was actually at $155.65. five whole dollars. like im sure for a target thats not a big deal — still noticeable and youd absolutely get yelled at but like big picture and all — but for us thats a decent chunk! this woman simply does not double check anything she does regarding the cash drawers and it outrages me.

ALSO ALSO yesterday i counted out my drawer and it ended on like $150.30. within the boundaries. she put it in for the when the other closer came in. i left at 2:30, this other girl came in at 6:30, so somewhere in that four hours she recounted the drawer. we have a binder we write our numbers in for ~Accountability~. she wrote and initialed that it was at the $150.30 i counted it out to. this drawer, for the three or so hours its running that evening, handles no cash. written in the binder it has a big ol NO CASH written through in the Cash In and Deposited sections. the drawer closed at $150.75. where??? did that extra??? .45¢ come from??? and like what a weird amount too! thats not a two-quarter whoopsie, thats a whole mess of coins. four dimes and a nickel. a quarter and two dimes. other combinations im too tired to list. and like when i counted it that next morning it was at that $150.75. which is impressive, as the last time a NO CASH she wrote that had different starting and ending numbers, it turned out that there wasnt actually a difference, and that the original starting number was in fact still the amount in there. her ending number was also off by like .37¢ or something that time so like.

man. tell me you dont count out the registers properly without telling me you dont count them out properly.

anyway all of this is to say: periods suck and i hate them and i fucking wish i could sleep instead of worrying about what im currently worried about.

[tomholland1996simp]

I’m just tired || Tom holland

Paring: Dad!Tom

Warnings: Tired reader, Angst kinda

Summary: You and Tom have a daughter who is  2 years old. Tom has been away filming and at night you have been getting no sleep, due to your daughter going sleep too late. One day Harry comes over, to see you looking very tired. He offers to help, however you say that your fine. The story carries on from there ;)

(I know it’s kinda like my ‘I’m sorry mummy’ one but people really liked it so here’s another)

Tom and I have a daughter who is now 2 years old turning 3 soon. Her name is Scarlett and she can be a very adorable, nice girl at some times. However she can have her days where she wants to throw tantrums everywhere and scream and cry all the time. It can be very stressful at times because Tom isn't always here. I know he can't help it due to filming, but I miss him a lot. I don't tell him how stressed and tired i've been lately as he's busy filming in America.

Yeah I know I should ask for help from his parents or brothers, however I wanna try be a good mum to Scarlett and try do it on my own. My best friend, Y/B/F/N, even told me that I need a break and I should ask for help, but I simply can't.

Lately Scarlett has been going bed so late around 1-3am. Her bed time routine has been so bad, so i've been up so late recently. Normally she has a good routine but whenever Tom goes she just messes around as I am what they call the 'soft parent'. I try be the mean one but I feel too bad when I try tell her off.

"Scarlett you need to go sleep, your uncle Harry is coming over tomorrow" I lay her back down. The time was currently 2:45am and she just wasn't going sleep.

"No. I want the phone" She huffs.

"You can watch something on my phone tomorrow-we'll today when you wake up" I place her back in her small bed.

"NOOOO" She runs out the room, so I chase after her. "I DONT WANNA GO BED" She screams and cries throwing some of her toys.

"Stop please bubs. Just go sleep" I was absolutely exhausted at this point. I only had 2 hours sleep last night and I know tonight will be the same.

(Btw she's still young so her words won't be clear so that's why they look like they are spelt wrong)

"Daddy would lwt me stay awke" she stood up crossing her arms.

"No he wouldn't"

"Yes daddy would!" she stomps her foot.

I lost it at this point, "WELL YOUR DADDY ISN'T HERE, I AM! SO YOU DO AS YOUR MUM SAYS AND GO TO BED!!" I shouted, then she runs up the stairs crying. Honestly after I said that I felt bad so so bad. This is why I am the soft parent because I never shout at her but she always listen to Tom. It's like she hates me and me only.

Walking up the stairs, I open her room door to see her crying under her covers. Slowly going over to her, I try pull the covers but she holds them tight. "I'm so sorry princess" I whisper.

"Go away pwease" her little voice choked.

"okay. Goodnight" I whisper walking out the room, crying on the way to mine and Toms shared one.

That night I cried all night long, I must've only got like 1 hour sleep. I woke up early in the morning as well , around 7am. The house needed to be cleaned and I had a lot of things to do. Harry was coming over at 1pm.

"Scarlett come down here, your uncle Harry will be here any minute now" I tiredly shout from the living room. Then I heard loud footsteps running down the stairs. Scarlett still hasn't spoken to me since last night but I understand.

About 10 minutes later there was a knock on the door, so I stood up opening it. Harry stood there with a big smile on his face.

"Hi y/n- oh wow are you okay?" His smile fades as he looks at my face.

"Yeah I'm fine" I shut the door behind him, giving him a side hug.

"You sure? You have big bags under your eyes. Are you even sleeping?" He takes his shoes off.

"Yes just had a rough night that's all" I lied sitting back down on the sofa.

"Uncle Harry!" Scarlett yelled jumping into Harry's arms.

"Heyy Scarlett! wow your getting bigger" He holds her on his hip. I can't lie I was trying so bad not to fall asleep. My arm was on the side with my cheek resting in my palm of my hand.

"Y/N you look really tired. I can take scarlett for a bit. Let you get some r-"

I cut him off, "No it's fine. I'm okay. Anyways how's everyone?...."

A couple hours has past, Harry already left. We just talked about random things and he played with Scarlett. He did keep offering to help, however I denied it. I needed to be independent and do this on my own.

Walking into Scarlett room I smile saying, "Bath time"

"I dwnt want a bawth" She says still playing with her toys.

"Come on smelly. You can bring some of your toys with you" I smile picking her up.

"I wanna play stop!" she starts kicking.

"Scarlett, what's up with this behaviour. Your normally a good girl" It was true, normally she's really good but recently she's been so bad. Maybe it was because she misses her dad, I wasn't sure.

She grabs the bathroom door, I shout "Let go!" I lock the bathroom door after so she couldn't get out.

"AHHHHHH" she screams laying on the floor.

After what felt like hours, she finally went into the bath. It must've been around 9p.m when she got out. She even started a fight when getting out the bath because she didn't want to brush her teeth. Scarlett was now laying on my bed crying with her head in the pillow.

That was until my phone rang and the picture with the contact of 'Tom❤️' came up. He normally FaceTimes whenever he can, even though it's hard with the timings.

"oh look daddy's calling" that's when her head shot up, wiping her tears she grabs my phone answering it.

"Hi ba-oh hey princess" he smiles into the phone. I could just about see him, looking cute as ever. It still hurt. I really miss him and I need him :(

"hi daddy" she smiles whilst sniffing. It makes me sad to know that she's so happy when she speaks to her dad and not me. I wouldn't say Im jealous, well I kinda am. But the feeling of your daughter hating you......makes you feeling like shit.

"What's the matter bubs?" he furrowed his eyebrows.

"Nwthing. Just hwr" Scarlett showed the camera quickly to me then back to herself.

Wow she just called me 'her'. I thought wiping a tear that fell, making sure they don't see.

"Scarlett she's your mummy, don't say 'her'-"

"Well shwe been mean. She keeps shouting at mw and she's being not fair!" she whines to him.

"Pass the phone to mummy please bubs" He says and she listens. See what I mean she listens to him but not me.

What am I doing so wrong?

I pick up the phone showing my face with a fake smile. "Hi darling" he smiles.

"Hi Tommy, how's filming?" I ask.

"Good, good. How's everything at home?"

"Everything's great." I lied again and Scarlett just glares at me.

"You sure? Harry called me today saying you looked tired. Which I can see by the bags under your eyes"

"Well Harry was wrong. I'm fine, I just had a rough night"

"Daddy when are you coming home?" Scarlett takes the phone with tears falling down her face.

"very soon scar don't cry though bubs" he says.

"Okay daddy"

"Well be good for mummy yeah?"

"Yeah. Goodnightw daddy" She smiles.

"Goodnight princess" He blows a kiss into the phone, then waiting for the phone to be passed back to me but I pressed to end the call. I know I should've spoken to him, told him that i'm tired and I need help. But Tom would probably try give me a lecture of how I should go to his families house.

Tom then sent a message:

Tom❤️- I thought we were gonna talk. You okay, love? xxx

Y/N - yeah just tired

Tom❤️- Oh okay. We'll get some sleep I love you Goodnight xxx

Y/N- Night love you xx

Little did you know Tom was on his way back. He would probably arrive around 2am-3 but he was coming back to surprise you and Scarlett.  

…………………………………….

Yep, for the fourth night in a row Scarlett doesn't want to go sleep. I've been placing her in her bed, I've tried laying with her, however she just won't go sleep without putting up a fight.

"Do you want me to read a book?" I hold a book in my hands showing her it.

She slaps it out of my hands so it hits my face, "No! I'm not twired" She gets up from her bed.

Grabbing her arm softly, I pull her back down on the bed. "Your staying here until you fall asleep"

"No! No,NOOOO!" she runs down the stairs into the front room. This time I chased after her full of anger as I was tired.

"SCARLETT NO TV BED NOW" Grabbing the controller out of her hands.

"IM NOT TIRED!" She screams and cries.

"I DONT CARE. ITS 3 IN THE F-IN THE MORNING. IM SICK AND TIRED OF THIS BEHAVIOUR. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GOOD NICE GIRL! IM TIRED AND ALL IM ASKING IS FOR YOU TO GO SLEEP. YOU LISTEN TO YOUR DAD WHY NOT ME" Tears started falling down my face.

"YOUR THE WORSTW MUMMY EWVER THATS WHY!" she throws one of her toys at the wall.

wow. That hurts.

Before I could say anything else back, the door opened and shut. There stood Tom, with his suitcase and a worried expression. His hair was messy, with a curl falling down his face and after 3months of not seeing him he felt like a ghost. You hadn't seen him in ages.

"hey, hey why's my two favourite girls fighting for at this time" he throws his bag on the floor, then flinging his shoes off.

"D-daddy" Scarlett cried running into her dads arms. Him crouching down and picking her up.

"I'm here bubs. Ahh you got so much bigger since I last saw you. Now why you both shouting" He puts her down, looking at me. I was still crying, tears freely falling down my cheeks.

"I hate mummy!" Scarlett quickly says, causing my heart to break. Tom gave me a sympathetic look before turning to our daughter.

"Scarlett you don't mean that-"

"It's fine. Honestly. I do try Scar. But don't worry your dad is here. So he can put you to bed" I fake smile walking away.

"Darling-" Tom tried to call for me but I had already got into the bedroom slamming the door behind me.

Toms POV

"YOUR THE WORSTW MUMMY EWVER THATS WHY!" I heard Scarlett cry before I entered the house.

As I opened the door, it went silent. There stood my two girls, both crying and angry. Scarlett was sitting on the floor, whilst y/n was standing a bit away from her.

"hey, hey why's my two favourite girls fighting for at this time" I throw my bag on the floor, then fling my shoes off.

"D-daddy" Scarlett cried running into my arms. I then crouch down and pick her up.

"I'm here bubs. Ahh you got so much bigger since I last saw you. Now why you both shouting" I put her down, looking at y/n. Tears were streaming down her face, with bags under her eyes. She looked exhausted but still so beautiful.

"I hate mummy!" Scarlett quickly say, I  gave y/n a sympathetic look before turning to our daughter. I knew y/n must feel heart broke right now and upset.

"Scarlett you don't mean that-" I go to say but get cut off by y/n. "It's fine. Honestly. I do try Scar. But don't worry your dad is here. So he can put you to bed" she fakes smiles walking away.

"Darling-" I tried to call for me but she had already got into the bedroom slamming the door behind her.

"Scarlett you don't say them things. Mummy is probably really upset now. You don't hate mummy do you really?" I kneel down to her holding her tiny hands.

"No. But she was being mean" she cries.

"Mummy is tired. She normally lets you off when you do naughty things, you have to learn sometimes. It's nearly 4am and you should be in bed. You have to listen to mummy when she tells you things okay?" I moved a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Okay" she smiles.

"Come on let's get you to bed" I pick her up.

Y/N POV

Ive been laying in my bed for a few minutes now and as I was about to fall asleep I heard the bedroom door open and close shut. My back was turned towards it but I knew it was Tom.

I heard the draws open, which meant that he was getting changed most likely in joggers. He doesn't wear a shirt to bed anyways so that's all he would else wear. The bed then dipped behind me and the covers were pulled up over us. His arm went around my waist pulling me closer to his body. Then his face was snuggled in the back of my neck.

"Darling" he whispered, kissing the back of my neck.

"mhm" is all I said back.

"she's asleep now" he says, I felt his hot breath on the back of my neck, which gave me shivers down my spine.

"Well done" I sniffle. I know it was kinda rude but when I'm really tired I can get like that.

It was silent for a few minutes until he broke it by saying "sorry"

This made me turn around to face him, "It's not your fault Tommy. I should be saying sorry to you. I didn't tell you that she was being like this, she must just miss you. Ever since you left she acted like a brat some days. These past 4 days she's been going bed around this time and i've gotten no sleep at all" I cry.

"Shhh. Come here" He pulls me into his chest.

"I'm just tired" I whispered.

"I know, I know. We will talk about this in the morning okay? Right now you need sleep and so do I. Tomorrow we can go on a date, i'll drop Scarlett off to my mums and we can do something fun whatever you want" he kisses my forehead.

"Thanks babe" I kiss him softly on his lips.

And what he said we did, we went on a cute little date and chilled in watching movies. The next day we picked up Scarlett, she did apologise realising that what she did was wrong. Then we all went to get some ice cream together, as one happy family.

Please send some requests message me!!

[fool-who-dreams]

little dirt-ball of happiness

summary:

Inspired by @yourallihave 's request!!

i dont know if you’re doing requests but if u do can i please req a peter parker x wilson! avenger! reader (deadpool)? except reader is only similar to their dad bcs of how good they are at killing people but they’re pretty awkward and shy so all the avengers freak out when they find out they’re deadpool’s kid through an interaction on the field? PLEASE have their weapon be a huge scythe 🤍🤍 feel free to experiment with this bcs i have no super clear idea,, thank you!!

“Hey!” You heard a cheery voice call right behind you. You closed your locker trying not to let your books fall to the ground before tuning around.

“Oh, hey” You replied, surprised by the presence of the cute, curly-haired boy in your chemistry class.

“y/n, right?” He asked scratching the back of his neck, his eyes fixated on the ground.

“yes.” You muttered as your cheeks heated up. You've had a crush on that boy since the beginning of the school year; he was your “permanent crush”, that one person that you’ll always like and that your mind always goes back to, even though you’ve rarely even spoken to the boy. “What can I do for you Peter?”

“Oh you know my name. That’s- that’s good. That is reaaally good.” He mumbled, mostly to himself. “Can I- do you- how- how are you?” He stumbled over his words a few times. If you weren’t blinded by the fact that Peter Parked was talking to you, you’d think the scene was almost painful to watch. “I heard you had the flu last week so you weren’t in class, but since you’re here now I assume you feel better, don't you? Do you- are you better?”

“I’m better, yes, I guess. Thanks for asking.” You chuckle. You felt confused and amused by the situation.

“I just-“ He paused before taking a deep breath. ���So, when you were not here we were assigned projects in couples in chemistry class. It’s due in a few weeks, I figured we should start working on it, since you’re better and the flu is go-”

“Wo-wo-wo wait. So…we’re partners?” You asked, trying not to sound too enthusiastic (which you were) and also trying to keep your eyes from lighting up.

“Yeah, wait- haven’t I mentioned that?” He blushed from embarrassment for not having said the one thing he came here to tell you.

“No, but I figured.” You chuckled.

“So, should we start working on it like, maybe…after school?” His voice went lower in volume by the end of the question.

“Yeah, absolutely. Sure.” You replied, a little too soon.

“Great!” The biggest smile appeared on his face at your answer. “How about tomorrow? At mine?”

“Sounds good. See you tomorrow.” You waved as you turned around, starting to walk towards your class. You knew you wouldn’t have been able to hold your smile in for much longer, so you let it blossom the moment you turned your back on the boy.

Little did you know, so did he.

—🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸—

“Morning old scumbag” You greeted your father, sipping your morning tea.

“Good morning to you, too, my little bundle of joy” Wade replied with a big smile painted on his face.

“I won’t be home for lunch today.” You informed. “I’ve got to work on a group project, we wanna get it over with as soon as possible.” “Alright. What kind of project is it? Maybe I can he-“ “Chemistry. Science. Maths. Whatever stuff you suck at.”

“Well, good thing it’s a group project then, because we both know you got that from me.” He sweet tone trying to take the focus off the passive-aggressive insult. It was your relationship. You loved each other very much, and that was just your weird, twisted way of showing it. If you’d ever be seen in public together you’d both probably get taken, or at least questioned, by authorities. And the sole thought of that made the two of you laugh every time.

Truth is, your father rarely left home as a civilian, he always did in his “superhero” costume. And you never were allowed to go out and fight, so you only ever left as y/n Wilson.

“C’mon, it’s late. I’m driving you.” Wade declared in a decisive tone as he grabbed the car keys and walked to the door.

“What- I can get the bus dad, thanks.”

“Why? What do you have to hide? Or even better, WHO?”

“Nobody! I just-“

“You have a boyfriend.”

“I don’t!”

He gasped. “You have a girlfriend!”

“I’m not dating anyone!”

“You sound rather defensive for a teenager who doesn’t have a-”

“OKAY BYE DAD, I’ll see you later.” You said, quickly getting your coat and walking towards the door.

“You’re ashamed of me, aren’t you?” His face fell a little to the (wrong) realization, which made your heart fall a little, too.

“That’s absolutely not it! I just- none of the other kids is driven to school, and I-“ 

“No, it’s fine, I understand. Who would want to be seen with a monster like me? You better go or you’ll miss the bus.”

You sighed, annoyed. “Fine. You can drive me.”

“YES!” He clapped his hands, opening the door. “Works like a charm every single time!”

—🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸—

“There we are. Have a nice day and break up with whomever you’re dating because you’re under the age of 70, which is the right age to start dating.” He said in one breath with a mocking smile plastered on his face. He kissed your forehead before you opened the door.

“I’ll see you later.” You rolled your eyes playfully at your father. You started walking towards the school entrance.

“Hey y/n!” You heard Peter’s voice call.

“Hey, Pete!”

“So, are we still on for today?”

“Yeah, totally.” You smiled warmly, the same warmth that spread from you stomach to your face every time he talked to you. Your conversation was interrupted by your ringtone, so you quickly excused yourself to walk away and answer.

“What now, dad?" “Who is that?!”

“That who?” “The boy you’re talking to! I said no boyfriend, and you reassured me that-“

“Is that why you insisted on driving me this time?” You whisper-yelled on the phone, making sure Peter couldn’t hear this embarrassing conversation (little did you know, his spidey senses made it so that his hearing was way above average).

“Of course! Why would I do that then?”

“I don’t know, because New York is dangerous?”

“Oh no, I don’t worry about that. Isn’t your school Spider-guy’s territory? I like that guy, he has a nice costume.”

“Are you saying I cannot take care of myself?”

“Oh please, you could save the Avengers and their mothers from an alien-zombie apocalypse, and you know it damn well!”

“Ow, don’t make me blush now.” You giggled.

“Break up with him.”

“I can’t, because we are not together!” You said one last time before hanging up.

—🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸—

“So, you’re saying that you’ve never seen Star Wars?!” Peter widened his eyes, making you giggle at his reaction.

“Never.”

“Get out.” He shoved you jokingly, trying to stay serious, but failing.

“Hey! You’ve never been to the Avengers Museum!”

“Those things are on two separate levels of importance, and Star Wars comes first. Star Wars always comes first!”

You giggled.

“This ice cream is good, isn’t it?” You asked, racing against the blinding sun to avoid wasting your food. “Thanks again, by the way. It was really nice of you to offer.” Saying this took all your strength

“It’s my pleasure. Glad you enjoy it.” His cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink, which made you smile softly.

As you were talking, Peter stopped abruptly in the middle of the sidewalk. “Hey, Pere, is everything okay?” You asked, worried.

“Yeah, it’s just…I thought I’d seen something.” He dismisses, still looking rather confused and cautious.

“Are you sure? If it’s a bad moment we can reschedule for anoth-“

“RUN!” Peter interrupted you.

The two of you started running, as fast and far as possible. Peter was rather impressed by the resistance and constancy of your running: you looked like you could easily keep up with him, and he was a superhero. This made him feel relieved, though, because it meant that you were going to be fine and safe. Although, he knew you’d be safe because he had made a promise to himself to keep you safe (and happy) the day he had seen you smile for the first time. He couldn’t bear a day without seeing that spark in his eyes, which had soon grown to be the light to his own eyes.

Pete found it funny how he would always realize his feelings or have his deepest thoughts right these moments, when he knew there was nothing he could do about it, nothing but fight; fight to see the light another day, so that he could make it right. And with you, he wanted nothing more.

To be exact, he realized all this the second he saw you laying on the floor, hopeless and scared. Your foot had gotten caught in the menace that was about to frighten the whole city: creatures started arising from the ground. The closest definition for these alien monsters — or what the Avengers later on simplified the species as — was just “zombies”. 

“Y/N! Are you alright?” Peter screamed, running back to you the second he realized he wasn’t holding your hand anymore.

“Not really” You joked.

“Oh my- it’s A HAND, your ankle got caught IN A HAND! God, I swear we’ll fix this, You’ll be free in no time, just-“ Peter started to panic as he tried to use his strength to set you free, but it didn’t seem to be working.

“Pete, why don’t you go find someone who could help, you’re pretty fast.”

“I won’t leav-“

“PETER THE REST OF HIS ARM JUST STUCK OUT OF THE GROUND” You shouted. “Please, find someone!” You begged him.

He looked deep in your eyes, then he nodded with determination and sprinted away.

“Oh sweetie, those nails…” You looked at the hand that was gripping your leg. “Let me fix that for you.” You commented as your hand reached the little pen in your pocket. The second you pressed the little button underneath it, it immediately revealed your loyal and beloved scythe. Before you knew it you were free from the strong grip, and an alien arm was laying on the floor.

You started running in the direction Peter had gone in. He had started running just a minute ago: he was fast but he couldn’t be too far.

Little did you know, Spiderman arrived as you left. He worried not seeing you there, but his curiosity won over his worry when he saw the arm detached from the rest of the body in the same spot you were trapped soon before. He knew you were free from that danger, but he didn’t know how many more traps were lying around.

“Hey Cap, there’s one of those alien zombie things here, but this one has a sense of fashion; in fact, this one’s wearing spandex.”

“Mr Stark!”

“C’mon Spidey, the big guys are waiting for us.”

As you were running you saw Iron-Man himself fly just above your head, closely followed by a web-shooting Spiderman! They were so fast, but you knew you could reach them. You could have been a hero after all.

—🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸———🕸—

“I wouldn’t…mind…a hand over h-here” Spider-man said between breaths as he fought for his life, and for the life of his city.

“Yeah, I gotta agree with the kid on this one.” Sam replied through the earpiece everyone was wearing as he jolted in the air, trying to fight off as many bad guys as possible.

“I wouldn’t mind a vacation.” Nat said as her feet landed on the ground after kicking people in the air for over thirty minutes.

“And I guess he wouldn’t mind an ambulance.” Clint chuckled to himself as another one of his arrows landed perfectly in a bad guy’s leg.

Iron Man’s hands were shooting lasers all around while the turbo from his feet was able to keep him detached from the ground. “Hey Cap, how many asses are you beating per minute? Because I think I’m winning this one.” Tony’s metallic voice joked.

“Oh, shut up and fight.” A heavily-breathing Captain America scolded him, dismissing the matter as he kept on throwing his shimmering shield at whomever dared to cross him.

“There- are- too many” Peter said in between pantings. 

“Hold on kid” Tony replied, also having a hard time, just like everyone else on the team.

Breathing heavily, you finally reached the flying heroes you had seen passing over your head a few minutes before.

“That’s amazing, they really look like they could use some help!” You squealed. “I probably shouldn’t sound so happy about it…”

You clicked your pen again and the scythe revealed itself again. “Here goes nothing” You mumbled before running towards the heroes. You started reaping the enemies like wheat. You freed the closest hero to you, Nat, then together you worked your way towards the others.

You were agile although you were never allowed to use your weapon. Whenever you’d open your pen, you father would get a notice and you knew he’d get to you in no time. Unless the car had no gas, in which case he’d take a bit longer.

“And who would that be?” Cap asked, astonished. “Tony, you have to stop recruiting 14 year-olds.”

 “Hey! This one’s not mine! Kid, do you know her?”

“First of all, I’m almost 16! And secondly, just because we might remotely look the same age doesn’t mean we know each oth- HEY, BUT THAT’S Y/N!”

“Really? That is the sweet, shy, innocent y/n you never stop blabbering about in the lab?” 

“Yes!” 

“The same y/n that you are so afraid doesn’t and never will like you back ever and ever and ever until the end of times?” A mocking Tony asked with a smirk.

“So you do listen when I speak!”

“No son, we cannot hide when you blubber. There’s a really big difference.”

As you freed the heroes, you talked to yourself. “I cannot believe I am saving Tony Stark from the zombies!”

“Alright, but don’t make this a habit” Tony replied as you helped him.

“Hey, you don’t make it a habit!”

“I like this one.” Cap giggled.

“Have you seen a boy that’s roughly my age around here? He has with brown hair and hazel eyes, his name is Peter Parker and I can’t find him anywhere!” You asked between a hit and a kick.

“Mh, the name does ring a bell…” Tony smirked underneath his suit.

“I have!” Peter exclaimed.

“REALLY?! Where? Is he okay?”

“Yea, he- he’s great. You must be y/n, he was worried about you.”

“He asked about me?” That made your heart melt. Your sweet tone contrasted your determined and powerful hits.

“Seems like there might be some chemistry between you and this boy… What’s the deal?” Nat exclaimed, wiping her hands from the dirt that the arising zombies had polluted the breathing air with. Everyone exhaled: apparently the city was out of danger, as one could deduce from the thousands of motionless, disgusting zombie-like frames laying all over the streets.

A voice interrupted you right when you were about to speak. “The deal is that whomever this boy may be, he has to stay at least six foot away from you.”

“Dad!” You exclaimed, running towards him. 

"Another man of spiders?" Thor asked, confused.

“Hi little dirt-ball of happiness” He hugged you. “Wait, what’s on your face? Is that a scratch?! Are you hurt? Alright, you lot are supposed to keep our people safe, but instead you hurt my daughter, how could you! Why am I even paying taxes if you all don’t even do your job appropriately?” He shouted without taking his eves off of your slightly scratched forehead.

“Dad, I’m okay.” You giggled.

“Yeah, and that’s not exactly how that works.” Clint stepped in.

“What do you-“ Wade looked in the direction of the voice and abruptly stopped talking. His eyes widened and he looked at you, then at the Avengers, going back and forth a few times. “Holy sh- are you guys the real deal? Are those the real Avengers? My daughter saved the Avengers?!”

“Yep. What’s up with spandex?” Tony mocked.

“Hey! This is not spandex, it’s actually a tailor-made imported Italian material!”

“We really need to thank you for your help y/n.” Cap’s voice emerged from the back of the group of superheroes. He smiled as he looked down to you, his hand proudly gripping on your shoulder.

“I- It’s my pleasure. I mean, not you lot getting attacked by zombies, that’s not a pleasure at all, but me saving you, that was a pleasure. Not that you needing to be saved it’s a pleasure, I- I should stop talking.” You blushed, embarrassed.

“Now it’s more like it” Tony’s visor revealed his face, and he smirked at Spiderman. “We’ve gotta go now, but thank you, kid.” Tony smiled at you.

“WAIT” Wade shouted, catching everyone’s attention. “I am dying to see your compound, please PLEASE, can I?”

After begging the heroes for a full 5 minutes, they agreed to let your father visit. You decided you’d rather go home and get some well deserved rest.

“Hey underoos, will you be a gentleman and make sure our savior y/n gets home safely?” One by one the Avengers thanked you and left. Everyone but Spiderman. 

“Do you mind?” Spiderman asked shyly. “I mean, it’s the least I can do after everything you’ve done for me- FOR US, today.”

“Not at all.” You giggled. “Hey, can I ask you a question?” You asked after gently refusing the option of being swung home. 

“Sure, what’s up?”

“Did Peter really ask about me?”

“Oh yea, he seemed really worried, too. He said he came back for you but you weren’t there anymore.” “Are you sure he’s fine now?”

“Oh yea! Definitely. He seemed like a smart guy, I’m sure he’s okay.”

“I just wanna stop by his house real quick to see if-“ “NO! I mean- I’m sure he’s- he’s fine. Maybe he is in shock and needs to rest. You seem to really care.”

“I do. I do more than I care to admit, actually. But I don’t wanna bore the amazing marvelous Spiderman with my love life.”

“LOVE? ARE YOU- ahem, are you in love with this Peter guy?”

“Oh well” you blushed, realizing you said one too many words. “I- I might be…alright, fine, I am. But he doesn’t like me back I’m pretty sure, so there’s no point in even telling him.”

“OH, I BEG TO DIFFER” Spiderman laughed nervously. “Y/n, he likes you back. Trust me. I didn’t wanna tell you but we’re actually good friends and he talks about you all the times. How your smile lights up the room the second you walk in; how even in the darkest days you manage to make him feel loved and cared for; how you’ve never seen Star Wars, but are willing to fix your faults.” 

You giggled and blushed at the same time.

“Trust me” He smiled from underneath his mask as he took your hands in his. “He does.”

“I am so sorry Spidey, but I have to go.” You smiled and thankfully squeezed his hands before running away. You quickly turned around to thank the red and blue superhero again but, in the blink of an eye, he was gone.

You then kept running in the direction of Peter’s house.

[veeveex3]

Just The Two of Us (Idia Shroud x gn!reader)

Tags: fluff, hurt / comfort, crack (?), miscommunication trope (derogatory), my attempt at perspective shifting and humor, idia slander /lh (idk why I bullied him sm in this chapter lolol)

Word Count: 3602

It's been a week since your last date with Idia and you're starting to believe that he's lost interest in you. However, Idia is insecure from what has happened on said date. Luckily, you're both able to clear each other's misconceptions.

AN: hhhhhh i'm sorry this took so longggg i just knew what I wanted to right but not how to write it, y'know. also i wanted to take a break from writing longer fics since I wrote the last one in the middle of the night (as if i'm not doing that again-)

You lay awake in bed. It's 1 am, the air is cool and the only noises you can hear are the trees shaking outside and Grim's little snores. You should, theoretically, be asleep right now. But your worries keep you up.

It's been about a week since your first, and seemingly last date with Idia Shroud. The boy you've had a crush on for so long. The boy you've been close friends with for even longer. And he hasn't talked to you since. You thought he hated you for that date. Maybe it was because you knew of his anxiety and still made him go outside. Maybe it was because you kicked him too much while playing that arcade game. Maybe it-

Your thoughts are luckily silenced by the bright light coming from your phone. You glance over at the notification. Speak of the devil.

Sans: hey you up?

You were annoyed by how nonchalant he seemed despite trying to avoid you for the past week but your desire to be closer to him was stronger than any resentment you had for the boy.

You: no lol

Sans: oh (╥﹏╥)

Sans: im sorry for waking you

Sans: forgot normies needed their sleep

Sans: ill let you sleep

You: no it's fine. i was just joking

Sans: ಠ︵ಠ

You: so, did you wanna talk about something?

There was silence for a few moments. Maybe he really was mad at you; you would think if the constant flickering of ellipses at the bottom of your screen had anything to say for it.

Sans: just wanted to ask you something (´-﹏-`；)

You: and this couldn't wait until morning??

Sans: yes

Sans: i wanna see you again

Sans: in person

Sans: i miss you

Sans: i really do

Your heart tightened with a multitude of different feelings. On one hand, you were upset because he could've spoken up about this beforehand. On the other hand, you would feel really bad to get mad at him if he was serious. And on a separate hand that swatted the other two away, you just wanted to hold your firey little shut in so bad!

You: you better not be lying y'know!

Sans: im not!!!

You: good, cuz i miss you too dumbass

Sans: (≧▽≦)

Sans: wait dumbass?!?!

If you were mad before, that feeling was swiftly filled with amusement. You tried to keep your laughter in, so as not to wake Grim, who was still peacefully sleeping at the edge of your bed. Feeling mischievous, you decided to tease Idia.

You: so, you wanna see me so bad huh???

Sans: ye?

Sans: if it's about me being distant for the past week, ikik

Sans: id rather talk about it in person though

Sans: i don't wanna talk about it over text and have you not believe me and get a bad end!

Your nerves started to grow again. You two didn't even start dating yet and he wanted to break up?! Hopefully this was just a misunderstanding on your behalf but given how tired and already upset you were before, it was hard to think rotationally.

You: k. how about we meet up tomorrow? or today ig

Sans: SO SOON?!?!

You were confused by his response. Clearly if he wanted you two to stay friends then he'd want to have this conversation earlier than later.

You: yeah, why not??

Sans: alright alright fineee

Sans: just dont come super early

Sans: maybe around 12 or something

You: sure. see you

You hoped your texts didn't come off as too bitter but honestly, you just really didn't want the relationship you two started to end so quickly. With that text, you tried to go back to bed.

°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°

Idia: alright

Idia: night

Idia dropped his phone on his desk and plopped his face in his hands. Your texts seemed dryer than usual, you didn't respond back to his good night text telling him he should go to bed as you usually would, and you wanted to see him this soon?! Idia's leg began to bounce as he bit his lip in frustration. He should really clean up his room now. Yeah he would have less time to grind in the newest MMORPG he started playing but it's the price he had to pay for you not to call him a disgusting NEET.

Idia got up from his chair to stretch. His lips positioned themselves into his usual frown as he checked his phone to see if you replied.

.*♡Prefect♡*.: sure. see you

That was the last message you sent to him.

"Of course they're upset at me still" Idia thought to himself, "I mean, I did avoid them for the past couple of days." Since he didn't go to school in person, he spent 90% of his time in his room. Even then, he wouldn't respond to your texts.

.*♡Prefect♡*.: hey! how are you today??

.*♡Prefect♡*.: is everything alright??

.*♡Prefect♡*.: are you upset?

Of course he wasn't upset at you, you miracle given to him by the Great Seven themselves! Why would he be? You're nice to him, your patient, you care about his needs more than he did, you let him kiss you on the cheek-

Idia let out a long, pitiful sigh. He leaned against his desk chair, forehead digging deeper and deeper into the headrest. He wanted to kiss you again. Hell, he would give up almost anything to kiss you properly. But he knew he wouldn't be able to. I mean, yeah you took him out on a date, sure. But why would you, the nicest, sweetest, most precious, and most attractive person be ok with him kissing you, let alone on the lips.

He slowly picked himself up from his chair. I mean, his room isn't going to pick itself up!

"I just really hope they're not mad at me" Idia muttered to himself, "I really do."

°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°

Noon came and you found yourself pacing at Idia's door. Unknown to you, Idia was exhausted from cleaning his room all night and loathing all morning. And unknown to Idia, you were fiddling with the hem of your shirt, thinking that Idia wanted to end your relationship seemingly as soon as it started.

You hesitantly knocked on the door. You heard a soft yelp from the other side followed by a couple small crashes.

"H-hold on a second!" You heard Idia yell from the other side. "And don't startle me like that!" A moment later, the door unlocked and Idia peeked through the crack as he normally did.

"Did you really have to knock that loud?" His voice was soft but still had the air of annoyance you were used to. You nodded you head with a stupid smirk on your face, to which the boy rolled his eyes and opened the door for you.

His room was a lot cleaner than it usually was: his bed was neatly made, any wrappers and boxes were either thrown out or neatly put away, and the cords that were usually littered across the floor were tucked away under his PC. You have Idia a dramatic shocked face while looking at his room and back at him.

"Are you sure this is your room?!" you teased, "It's so clean! And I can barely smell the usual burnt hot pocket stench in here!" Idia lightly bonked you on the head for that remark, causing you to dramatically wince in pain.

"I do clean up here every once in a while, you know? You thought I just never cleaned?" Again, you nodded aggressively to his question. Idia sighed at you and plopped down on his bed. You walked up to his bed to do the same before you stopped yourself. The boy pouted as he noticed you standing in front of his bed still and ever-so-gently patted the spot next to him.

"Y-you don't have to ask permission to sit on my bed. I don't… mind." You did as he said and sat down next to him.

The next couple of minutes were met with silence. Occasionally, one of you two would open your mouths to speak only to be met with silence. Before the last couple of weeks, you and Idia would be a lot more relaxed around each other. Time spent in his room would mainly consist of Idia playing games or working at his desk while you would annoy him while sitting on his desk. What you would give to go back to bombard Idia with requests to pay attention to you just to show him a stupid meme or play the vibe boom sound affect to annoy him. It was like you were two different people now.

"So," you finally spoke up, "what'd you wanna talk about in person?" That question was so simple but hit Idia like a truck. He'd been rehearsing how to talk to you about this but fell short at the task at hand. His mind went blank as he stuttered, fiddling with his hands as he grew more uneasy knowing you were looking at him so intently. He took in a sigh.

"I'm really sorry." Idia trembled as he spoke. He brought his knees up to his face, hiding it and any potential tears that might come out.

"For what?" you asked. You hoped it was for him not responding to your messages for the past week but that didn't seem to be the case since he wouldn't necessarily need to apologize to you in person for that.

"For the date. I was really lousy and anxious and a burden, y'know? And I even had the audacity to…" he paused for a second, burying himself deeper into his knees, "kissing you, in the photo booth." Idia wiped any loose tears on his pants and looked at you to see your response. Surprisingly to him, you had the most deadpan face he's ever seen from you.

"Are you deadass?"

"Y-yeah? Did I say something wrong? Was that not a proper apology for you? You want me to grovel at my knees, begging you for my forgiveness and give you all of my possession?" Idia yelped again as he saw how your face looked somehow even more annoyed. He swore he was about to throw up right then and there. You stood up from the bed to stand right in front of him.

"H-hey, what're you-"

SMACK

Both of your hands held Idia's cheeks as he winced in pain.

"You have to be one of the smartest yet stupidest people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting!" You began to smush his face together as he spoke. "I've known you for about a good year now. I've been friends with you for about a good year now. And I've liked you, ROMANTICALLY, for a long while now!"

"R-really?!" Idia looked at you with a dumbstruck expression. You squished his face closer together in response, kneeling down to his eye level.

"Yes, really. And I went on a date with you. I had so much fun that day. Hell, I even kissed you before too and you seemed to enjoy that quite a bit!" Idia grew flustered in your hold. You wondered whether or not he was a robot too, given how much he was seemingly malfunctioning.

"Well- that's because- you know, I-" The more Idia failed to speak the warmer and pinker he became; which was good news for you because you found that shit adorable. You were only teasing him but finding out he really did enjoy your little forehead peck filled your heart by tenfold. But now wasn't the time for gushing over how cute the humanized fireball was. You gently removed your hands from Idia's face and held his hand in yours, placing them on his lap.

"Idia, I'm not upset at you for the date. If anything, I'm more upset that you ignored me for a week since you were probably sulking the whole time." Oof, you hit the nail right on the head.

Idia shrank into himself, feeling even worse about himself. He trembled, trying to hold back his tears. He wasn't considering the fact that you enjoyed spending time with him. He was so used to only Ortho wanting to spend time with him and caring about him. Having a whole human being who wasn't his brother enjoyed his presence so much that they missed the absence of it filled him with overwhelming emotions. Then, you pulled him in for a loose yet gentle embrace, and he cracked.

He brought you in closer, shoving his face in the crook of your shoulder to hide the sniffles and whimpers. You gently rubbed small circles against his back and he trembled more from how hard he was holding back sobbing aggressively into your shoulder.

°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°

Idia began to calm down in your touch, but soon got up to wipe his tear-stained face.

"So," you began to speak, causing the boy to jump, "should I leave now?" You didn't want to leave so soon, all you wanted was to hang out with your favorite gamer boy. However, from what he had displayed earlier, you thought it would be best for him to cool off on his own.

"Wait, no!" Idia realized how loud and desperate he sounded. He began to mentally curse himself for that. "I- I mean, if you'd like to leave you can. But I'm also fine with you staying too."

"Alright, then I guess I'm staying for the night then." You thought it would be best to go back to Ramshackle dorm and pick up some stuff if you were going to do so.

"W-wait- what- h-huh?!" Idia rushed towards you in confusion. He had a bunch of questions to ask at once such as "Why are you leaving?", "Why are you staying overnight?", "Do you wanna sleep in my bed? With me in it?" "Am I dreaming???"

"Well, I thought now's a better time than ever to make up for the time you ignored me for the past week. Plus, I have to get stuff from my room like pajamas and snacks." You moved towards him, poking his chest to get his attention. "That is, unless you have some spare clothes you can lend me instead?"

He was gonna start crying again if you kept this up. He's not at a high enough level to unlock your SSR tier costume! He was just hoping that this limited-time event was gonna get a rerun.

"Well then, I'm going back to my dorm now. See you in a bit!"

"See you…" Idia shut his door as you ran back to Ignihyde's dorm mirror. He cursed himself for ever thinking of ignoring you for so long if this is what the consequences would've been.

You came back with a backpack's worth of stuff, in addition to a small bag of snacks and bottled water.

"What's the bag for?" Idia inquired.

"Well, since we're probably gonna be staying in your room for the rest of the day, I thought I might as well get us some food to eat." Idia's eyes widened, realizing the last thing he ate was a half-leftover bag of gummy worms last night before he started cleaning. How he's still alive amazes the both of you.

You set down your backpack at the edge of Idia's bed and the bag of snacks on his desk. You tried to pick snacks that weren't just sweets given Idia's shit diet that seemed to consist mainly of candy and energy drinks. You make a mental note to order something with vegetables for dinner. One snack in particular catches your eye though.

"Hey, Idia" you call out to him. He hums in response, also checking out the snacks in your bag. "Wanna watch a couple movies?" You grab a bag of popcorn chips and shake it at him.

"Sure" he replies, trying hard not to focus too hard on how hungry the popcorn chips make him, "I can boot up a couple on my laptop." Idia went to grab his laptop while you went to make a pillow nest on the floor.

"Do you really have to put all of my stuff on the floor?" Idia complained as you began to add one of his bean bag chairs in the nest.

"Would you rather sit and cuddle on the bed?" Idia flushed at the mix of tease and sincerity in your voice as he shook his head. You chuckled as you continued to work on your nest, making it big enough for the two of you to fit without making it too small so as not to make things too uncomfortable. The two of you plopped in your creation, pulling a blanket over your laps.

"What do you wanna watch?" Idia asked.

"I wanna watch something stupid."

"Huh, why's that?"

"The shittier the movie, the funnier it is to laugh at how much money the producers wasted."

"Fair enough." Idia chuckled as he went looking for a bad movie to watch.

As he was looking, you decided to sneak glances at the boy in question. His hair was put in a high ponytail, likely from when he was cleaning his room last night. His lips were slightly agape and occasionally wetted by his tongue. He was wearing his long-sleeved black and blue undershirt, black sweatpants, and uncharacteristic purple cat print socks. You bit your lip unconsciously; realizing how creepy that would have seemed, you pried your eyes away from him. You felt a slight tap on your shoulder, causing you to jump.

"Is this one ok?" He pointed to the screen, showing the description for a movie called "The Velocipastor". You failed to hold in your laughter reading it, leading Idia to laugh as well and start the movie. Some time passed as the two of you watched the movie while making snarky commentary on it.

"Why did the pimp even kill the main character's parents anyways?" You ask, reaching for another popcorn chip.

"I dunno. Maybe it's because most media protagonists need to have at least one dead parent to add to their tragic backstory. Imagine this movie as a shounen anime lmao." The two of you started laughing hysterically at the thought. You had to rewind just so you wouldn't miss anything.

As you went to grab more of your chips, you realized the bag was empty. Your hand went to grab another snack from your snack bag as your hand brushed Idia's. He was quick to pull his hand away, but placed his hand on the bag after you got your new snack. His golden eyes glanced at your hands every once in a while, you couldn't help but smile at how obvious he was being.

You slowly placed your hand on top of Idia's. His hand was large and slightly cool. It was rough likely due to how much he deals with machinery. His fingernails were visibly chewed on while his knuckles were boney and prominent. You began to rub over his hand with your thumb, causing the boy to let out a soft sigh. He quickly cleared his throat and rewound the movie once again. You looked over at the clearly flustered boy and chuckled at how cute he was being. The noticable pink tips of his fiery hair would be the death of him.

°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°*~*°

Over the course of the night, the two of you watched four shitty movies, had dinner, and had a bunch of fun. After dinner though, you grew sleepy, having only so much energy left. You would slowly start falling asleep only to jolt yourself awake every couple of minutes. That was until Idia stopped the movie you were currently watching and closed his laptop.

"Why'd you stop the movie?" You tried to wipe as much sleep from your eyes as you could.

"Because you need to go to bed" Idia replied, getting up to put everything away, "A normie like you can't stay up for very long, y'know?" You pouted at his teasing, knowing he wasn't exactly lying. It was getting pretty late and your body was getting heavy from drowsiness. You huffed as you made a makeshift bed on the floor and lied down.

"Good night." You yawned, "Don't let the bed bugs bite."

"Night" Idia muttered, trying to grab a pillow for his bed. As he went to pull the pillow away, your hand grabbed gently at his sleeve, tugging it with just as much strength. His heart tightened from your display. He knew he'd regret it later but he'd have to be a new brand of evil to resist your sleepy charm.

Idia lied down next to you. As he did, he studied your face as he briefly noticed you did to him earlier. Every part of you was perfect to him: your parted lips, you gently fluttering eyelashes, your soft snores. He was so glad to have such a nice CG to go to sleep looking at. He knew he'd have the sweetest dreams from this.

You stirred a bit, causing Idia to turn around away from you, just in case his face creeped you out. Just as he was about to fall asleep, he felt a slight push against his back. Turning slowly as not to disturb you, he found you trying to tuck yourself into his back. He turned back again to face you and pressed his forehead against your temple.

"Sweet dreams."

[illicitlimerence-writes]

forgotten | l. norris

pairing: lando norris x reader word count: 2.6k words (i really thought i could write a short blurb. ha.) request: yes/no. by an anon: "maybe one where is her birthday and he kind of forgets to hang out with some friends that dont really like her but mid day he notices stories on his instagram of her friends congratulating her and he tries to gather the stuff he had planned for her surprise and even though she’s hurt that he wasnt with her before it end fluffy?" i hope you like this!!! thank you for sending this!!! i hope it's okay i wrote it with lando, at first i was picturing mick, but i feel like he just wouldn't forget about your birthday. warnings: angst, an asshole friend, language, domestic!lando at the end, i'll add more when i re-read it later!!!!!! probably don't read it if you get the birthday blues like i do (which, i didn't get this year!!!!!!). (also, i really don't know if lando actually has a friend named jason, i just picked it randomly) a/n: well, this birthday was indeed better than the years before! i felt very loved by the people i truly care about.

my masterlist

the usual morning routine began the moment you felt soft lips on your cheek. an instant smile grew on your face as you blinked the sleep away.

"morning," you heard his raspy voice in your ear, followed by a series of small kisses on your neck and shoulder.

"good morning, baby," you said, turning on your side, his arm slipped around your waist, you felt tingles on your skin as his thumb rubbed back and forth.

"d'you sleep well, angel?" he asked and you nodded, humming.

"you?" you ran your hands through his hair, nails scratching his scalp, he sighed at the relaxing feeling.

"yeah," he moved his head to kiss your wrist.

what a great birthday morning, you think.

you're about to voice that thought when the loud alarm interrupted you, bringing you out of the blissful state. you both groaned, falling on your backs and staring at the ceiling. after showering lando went to the kitchen to make breakfast for you two as you finished getting ready for the day. you'd left your schedule free for the day, you hadn't made plans because you were secretly hoping you could just stay all day at home with him.

"shoot, i have to leave," lando said, grabbing all of your empty dishes and placing them in the dishwasher. you raised your head, furrowing your eyebrows.

"where are you going?" you asked, you didn't remember him mentioning any plans he had for today.

"jason's in town. we're going golfing," he said, pecking your lips before heading to your shared bedroom. you stared at his figure as he left, feeling a little knot in your stomach.

he didn't even wish you a happy birthday.

he returned with his car keys in hand, his golf clubs in the other.

"what time will you be back? i was hoping we could spend the day together," you said, standing up and walking to him.

"we can do something tomorrow, i have the afternoon off. i really have to go now, i'll see you later," with that he rushed through the door, but you followed him.

"don't you know what day today is?" you asked, now feeling a little hurt.

"yeah, it's friday. bye, love you!" he said over the sound of the engine. you crossed your arms over your chest, watching as the car sped down the road.

you went back inside, your mind running. had he forgotten? just two days before he said he couldn't wait for your birthday.

your phone ringing brought you out of your thoughts. you rushed back inside, closing the door behind you. a shriek coming from the speaker startled you, but you started laughing as your best friend began singing 'happy birthday'.

"and how's your day going? what does lando have planned?" she asked.

"umm, it's been good. he just left, one of his friend's in town so they went golfing," you said as you went upstairs.

"and he didn't invite you?" she said and sounded surprised.

"uh, no. and honestly, i don't think i would've joined him if he offered. he was going with jason," you said. you and jason didn't have a really good past. you'd heard from other friends of lando that jason often told lando he could do much better than you, that he was a famous athlete and therefore could have any woman he wanted, and it made no sense why he settled for a 'boring girl' like you, his words.

"he's still friends with that asshole?!" she yelled.

"apparently," you shrugged your shoulders. you'd never told lando that you knew what jason thought of you, but he did know that you weren't the same when he was around. unconsciously, you always tried to make yourself smaller when jason walked in the room.

"well, does he have something planned for later?" she sounded angry now.

"i don't know. he didn't tell me anything. he didn't-" you stopped yourself.

"what?" she pressed on.

"he didn't... wish me a happy birthday, i think he forgot." your voice was small. you didn't want to make a big deal out of it, you knew he always had a million things in his mind.

"what?! that's it. i'm coming over. get ready cause we're going out,"

"(y/f/n)...-"

"none of that, (y/n). it's your birthday and if your boyfriend doesn't want to spend it with you, then i will."

hours later, you laughed with (y/f/n) as you waited for your lunch. you were at a restaurant you'd been wanting to try for a few weeks now. every few minutes your phone would ring, and each time you checked in hopes you'd see a message from lando. but it was all your friends posting ig stories tagging you and wishing you a happy birthday.

you stood up to go to the restroom, taking your phone with you, you sent a quick text to lando.

'went out with (y/f/n). how's everything going?'

you checked it before you went back, only seeing the instagram notifications. when you arrived back at your assigned table, there was a slice of chocolate cake waiting for you, with a small candle lit up. you hugged (y/f/n) and thanked her as she took her phone out and began recording, singing happy birthday as you laughed.

she posted it to her story, tagging you and, unbeknown to you, she tagged lando as well.

after that you went to a few shops, grabbing a few things you were saving up to buy. as you waited for (y/f/n) to finish paying for her own stuff, you took a few minutes to repost all the stories you'd been tagged in, adding a small 'thank you' gif to each of them.

she drove you back home, lando's car nowhere in sight. you couldn't help but sigh at the empty spot in your driveway.

"come on, let's get ready." she said, turning off the car and grabbing your new purchases. she'd convinced you to go out to dinner as well, this time to a fancy restaurant downtown.

whilst you'd been roaming around in the shops, she'd texted lando, telling him she'd take you there, and she'd let him take all the credit for the surprise if he showed up. she never got a reply, he hadn't even read the message.

so, she texted your friends, all the ones that had posted you on their stories, (y/f/n) contacted them and told them to meet you there.

you came out of the bathroom wearing a new outfit you'd bought for the occasion.

"hey, there, gorgeous," she wolf-whistled. you chuckled, pretending to be a runway model, exaggerating each movement.

"no paparazzi, please!" you laughed. once you were back in her car, you couldn't help but send another text to lando. truth be told, you were a bit worried, he hadn't replied to your earlier text, but he did see it. you tapped the dial icon, pressing the phone to your ear, you see (y/f/n) side-eyeing you. you huffed when he didn't pick up and the call went to voicemail.

"forget about him, tonight is about you, (y/f/n)."

"i just... i don't get it. did he really just forget it? like, just a few nights ago he kept saying how excited he was for today, and how he had so many things planned. but this morning he just... i don't know. i don't want to think too much but it... it hurts, you know?" you rambled, and he nodded along to everything you said.

"i get it, babes. but you have me," she said, and you nodded.

"i can't thank you enough for today,"

"you don't have to. you deserve so, so much more."

the rest of the car ride was spent singing along to every song that came on the radio, with the wind hitting your faces and laughing when one of you sang off-key. you arrived to the restaurant in the blink of an eye, (y/f/n) stating her name to the hostess, who led you to a private area.

you blinked twice, most of your friends from high school, uni and work were there. they wasted no time in running to you and showering you with love.

-a few hours earlier-

the sunlight hit lando's face, and he ran his hand through his hair before readjusting the cap on his head.

"i'm going to get something to drink, you want anything?" lando said.

"don't worry mate, i'll get it." jason said, letting his club fall on the grass.

"thanks. hey can you check my phone for any messages?" he yelled as jason walked to the cart, he simply nodded.

he grabbed his friend's phone, seeing a lot of notifications from several apps. he immediately rolled his eyes as he saw you had texted lando. he deleted the messages and missed calls.

he rushed back to his friend, passing him a bottle of water.

"nothing, mate," jason said.

"really? nothing from (y/n) either?" lando asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"you're still with that chick?" he complained. lando chocked on the water he was swallowing.

"yeah, we're still together. and i'd really appreciate it if you called her by her name, she's important to me and i need you to respect that,"

"fine, jeez. and no, she didn't send anything,"

they continued playing for a few more hours. as they finally made their way out of the course, lando pulled out his phone, opening his messages. he opened his chat with (y/f/n), first he saw the texts about taking you out to dinner and even letting him take credit for it.

he was completely taken aback by it, he didn't know what he had done wrong. he moved on to instagram, seeing his tag on (y/f/n)'s story, then the rest of your friends'.

it was like his whole world came crumbling down. he immediately opened his chat with you, but didn't see any new texts other than the ones from a few nights ago.

"are you sure (y/n) didn't text me?" he asked jason, who was packing everything up in lando's car.

"nah, dude. didn't see anything," he answered. lando looked down on his phone, tapping your contact name to call you. voicemail. he tried again, voicemail. third time's a charm, nothing. he tried (y/f/n) next.

"too fucking late," lando heard (y/f/n)'s voice.

"hey, hey, where are you? where's (y/n)? is she with you?"

"she went home you dickhead. said she had a headache, but it was all bullshit."

"fuck, i forgot..."

"yeah, no shit, sherlock. you have a lot to make up for."

"i know. god, i'm such an idiot."

"won't contradict you on that one," she said.

"shit, fuck. okay, i'll talk to you later. i'm going home, can you check up on her?"

"just know i'm doing this for her. she's happy with you, but if anything happens, say goodbye to your future children."

"always a pleasure (y/f/n)," lando said, hanging up the phone. lando thought (y/f/n) was being to nice to him compared to what lando thought of himself at that moment.

"so, i was thinking we could hit some clubs, get some girls-"

"listen, jason, i need to go. now. i'm sorry but you'll have to find another ride, it's urgent."

"what's going on?" he asked, watching as lando climbed into his car and turned on the ignition.

"it's (y/n), i have to go home, she-"

"you're seriously ditching me for that chick? i've been your friend for years. girls come and go, you'll find another one."

"i don't want, or need another one." with that, lando sped up, leaving jason behind.

you curled up in bed, you'd removed your makeup and put on your favorite comfy pajamas, which consisted of a pair of shorts and one of lando's hoodies. it still held his scent.

the light from the tv illuminated the room, your favorite comfort movie playing in the background. you weren't really paying attention, too busy thinking about lando.

you didn't know when exactly you drifted off to sleep, but the sound of the front door closing woke you. you heard rustling, followed by a set of footsteps climbing the stairs. you hated the small knot that formed in your stomach.

the door to your room opened, you stayed still with your back to it. you felt the bed dipping beside you, heard a small rustling as soft petals hit your nose, making you flinch.

"you're awake..." lando whispered. you opened your eyes, seeing his hunched figure. you gave him the smallest smile. "angel, i'm so sorry. i- i knew your birthday was coming up and i- i had so many things planned. we- we were going to-" he rambled, your heart broke at the sight of his clearly disturbed face.

"it's okay, it happens." you said

"it's not okay. not in the slightest. and to think that i left you for someone you don't even like, i... i don't even know what to say."

"then don't say anything. let's go to sleep, we can talk about it in the morning," you said, feeling exhausted.

"but, angel, this-"

"i know. i know, and we will talk about it when we're both well rested. please?" you said, grabbing his head.

the next morning you woke up to an empty bed. dread filled your body immediately. your mind began wandering again, but stopped as you heard the loud fire alarm coming from downstairs, followed by a series of curses and quick footsteps.

you made your way downstairs, seeing the clock on a wall. last night left you exhausted, seeing as you slept well past midday. you stopped in your tracks as you reached the living room. there was a small path leading to the kitchen, but other than that, every surface was covered in flowers. all kinds of flowers all in your favorite colors. even some of lando's helmets had been replaced by flowers.

starstruck, you walked to the kitchen, where a worried lando stood, looking at the burnt cake he tried to bake.

"morning," you said, leaning against the door frame. lando's eyes flew to you, and he wasted no time in rushing to you and giving you a kiss that left you breathless. "what's all this?" you asked, pointing with your head to the flower shop that now lived in your home.

"angel, that's nothing compared to what i have planned for you today," he said, biting his lip. you smiled, kissing his cheek.

"does it involve a burnt cake?" you couldn't help but tease him.

"you weren't supposed to see that," he said, his head falling in defeat. you laughed, standing on your tiptoes, you threw your arms around his neck and pulled him down for another kiss.

"come on, i'll help you," you said, taking his hand and pulling him towards the pantry, where you began taking out the ingredients. you felt his hands on either side of your waist, he leaned his head on your shoulder.

"but baby, this is for you."

"and i very much like my home as it is, i don't want it to burn down when we can bake a new cake together safely this time."

he gave in, kissing your temple, a soft 'i love you' leaving his lips.

lando kept hold of you the entire time, standing behind you with his hands on your waist as you poured all the ingredients, his hand on yours as you mixed the batter. he fed you small bites of the cake once it was cool and decorated, only to replace the fork with his lips right after each bite, tasting the sweetness on your lips.

eventually, as you sat on the couch next to him, he apologized for yesterday, and you could hear in his voice that he truly regretted it and was sorry for forgetting it. you explained your side of the story, and he explained his, you both filled in the blanks for what you'd missed on the other's day. you talked it through, explained how you felt but had forgiven him the moment he looked at you with that pained look on his face. you made promises, cried through happy tears and sweet words, falling a little deeper in love with one another.

the perfect day ended with lando posting a photo of you, officially making your relationship public after almost two years of dating. how you both managed to hide it for as long as you did surprised you.

in the picture, you were sitting in the middle of the living room surrounded by the hundreds of flowers, smiling hard with his present for you sitting on your lap, a beautiful golden retriever puppy.

'yesterday was my best girl's birthday, today we add a new member to our small family. welcome to the fam, ivy norris.'

[darkthingshappen]

Brother's Keeper

Chapter 9: (Part 1) Anticipation

(For the poll, posting in two parts won, so this is part one of 2 for chapter 8. I'll post part two sometime tomorrow. Enjoy)

Tagging List: @i-can-even-burn-salad @peachy-panic @deluxewhump @arwenadreamer @whumpcereal @melancholy-in-the-morning @dont-touch-my-soup @whumpsday @keeper-of-all-the-random-things @whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump @oddsconvert @melennui @susiequaz12 @morning-star-whump (I hope I'm not forgetting anyone - please let me know if I am and I'll fix it. I'm still getting used to this) 

Masterlist

*!*!*!*!* 

Ben’s heart was pounding in his chest. He watched Volkov talking with the others in the low growling Russian he was becoming familiar with, yet still didn’t understand.  He’d just had breakfast and was still on his knees, trembling.  He was so damn scared, and in so much pain.  He could still feel the sting from the needles he’d had to endure two days in a row.  His fingernails still throbbed.  

His teeth chattered while they made him wait, and his muscles spasmed with cold fear.  Volkov had tortured him every day, and Ben had passed out from pain each time.  The sadistic man timed how long he lasted.  Ben was horrified to realize that Volkov was learning his limits so that he could drag out the pain longer. 

The second day with the needles had been far worse because he’d taken it slower, letting Ben have time to breathe and adjust to the new levels of agony.  The session time had nearly doubled, with Ben forced to lay there and listen while Volkov talked Dmitri through how to torture the boy ‘properly.’ 

The low conversation broke up, and the group of abusers returned to stand around Ben.  He kept his eyes on the ground, hoping to hide even  a fraction of his terror.  Dmitri stood behind him and grabbed his hair, forcing him to look up at Volkov.  

The big Russian had a playful gleam in his eye, and Ben knew enough to hate it now.  

“My boys and I were just discussing your options for today.  Dmitri wants to see how you handle an electric baton, but I don’t know if you’re ready for that.  He did point out that you respond well to your collar.”

Ben’s mouth went dry.  “A-a-and my o-other option-options?”

“A caning.  Or maybe knives.  Once you’re mine, I plan on giving you some lovely tattoos and maybe a brand or two.” Volkov ran a possessive hand across Ben’s shoulders.  “People I sell all bear my mark, and you will too, lovely little scholar.”  Volkov sighed wistfully.  “But, to be fair to your brother, I have to give him his time, barring that he doesn’t do anything stupid like rat me out.  It really is too bad.  I hate waiting, but we shall have to.”  He patted Ben’s cheek.  

“I-if… If I pick the cane… will you leave my feet a-alone?”  Ben’s feet were just starting to become less tender.  They still hurt, but no longer throbbed through the night.  

Volkov pursed his lips.  “I might agree to that.  But I want you chained by your wrists.  We’ll let you stand, but you can always pull yourself up if you need to get off your feet for a few moments.  I know they still hurt, but you should be able to put a bit of weight on them now.”

Ben did not agree.  The burns were scabbed over, but still could not take his weight.  Still, maybe he could stand on his toes.  He thought about the shock collar locked around his neck and how agonizing it was when Volkov used it.  

“I don’t… I don’t want to be sh-shocked,” he said out loud, weighing his options.  

Volkov pulled out a knife and let the light reflect off the blade.  “And this option?”

Ben shook his head frantically.  

“So, a caning then?”

“Y-yes.” A full body shudder ran through Ben as he answered.  Volkov grinned maliciously.  

“Excellent choice, Malyshka.”  Volkov’s wicked smile widened.  “I’ll save the baton for the next time you step out of line.”

That did not sound at all promising.  

Volkov brushed Ben’s floppy brown hair out of his face.  “You’ll probably need another shower later today.  Do well with the caning and maybe I’ll let you have some warm water.  Hmm?  Does that sound good?”  

Ben wanted to scream in fury.  Basic human needs weren’t supposed to be a bargaining chip.  But when he swallowed and felt the collar bob against his Adam’s Apple, he shoved his anger back down.  

“I asked you a question, Little Benjamin,” Volkov threatened.  

“Yes, sir.  Warm water sounds good,” Ben replied, unable to keep the sarcastic edge out of his voice.    

Volkov slapped him hard, and Ben cried out when he landed again on his sore shoulder.  

“Watch your tone with me, boy.  Or we’ll be using that baton sooner than you like!”  

Ben grit his teeth, his eyes narrowing angrily as he looked up at Volkov.  I hate you! He wanted to scream.  His powerlessness was suffocating him.  He sucked in air through his nose as his fury raged beneath the surface.  

Volkov’s hand moved to the pocket where he kept the remote to Ben’s collar.  Ben dropped his head back on to the floor.  Fuck it and fuck Volkov.  If Volkov was going to shock him, then he was going to shock him.  It wasn’t like anything Ben did made a difference.  

“Are you done, Malyshka?” Volkov asked.

Stop calling me that! Ben’s internal rebellion was growing louder, but he knew that would only lead to more pain.  

“Yes, sir.” Ben said evenly, just barely managing to calm his tone.  

“Good. String him up.  I want to see him squirm.”

Ben was pulled up, dragged over to the drain, and deposited on his knees.  There was no bar above him this time, only a hook. 

Dmitri grabbed the short length of chain between Ben’s wrists, which were still behind his back, and started to pull up.  Ben cried out as his shoulders were strained, and his head involuntarily dropped toward the ground.  

“No!  No!  Stop!  Stop stopstopstop!  You’re gonna break my arms!” he screamed as Dmitri kept slowly pulling his arms up behind him.  

“And?” Dmitri quipped nonchalantly.  

“No!  Please!  Stop!” Ben looked over to Volkov.  “Y-you… You said I could pull myself up to get off my feet.  Please!”

“Hold.”  

The steady upward motion stopped at Volkov’s command.  Ben panted and ground his teeth together, waiting for Volkov’s decision.  

“I did, didn't I?  And since I am a man of my word… Dmitri, let his arms down, then rechain them in front.”  Ben gasped with relief as Volkov’s orders were carried out.  “You did look gorgeous just now though.  I think we’ll throw stress positions into the mix for one of your choices soon.  I’d love to see you tremble and sweat as you try to maintain some forced position.”  

God, I fucking hate it here, Ben thought to himself, trying desperately to keep all the shame and frustration of having to submit inside.

His hands shook as the cuffs were undone and refastened in front of him.  Then Ilya and Dmitri yanked him up with brute strength and attached him to the hook above.  Tears sprang into his eyes as his feet brushed the floor.  If he could manage to stay on his tiptoes, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.  

He could already feel the burn in his calves as he made the effort to not stand flat on his sore feet.  He watched Dmitri take the cane off its place on the wall.  Dmitri flexed the thin wooden rod, testing its suppleness.  

Why did they always want to hurt him? Not for the first time, Ben wondered what had he done to deserve this.  The more he thought about it, the more he realized that he really hadn’t done anything.  He didn’t know anything.  He wasn’t being tortured for information.  There was nothing he could do to change this.  He was a pawn in a sadistic game that Volkov was playing.  A game Volkov was winning.  

Volkov sat in his familiar seat, a pleasant smile on his face, drink in his hand.  He nodded to Ilya, and Ben only had a moment to anticipate what was coming before his shirt and bottoms were torn from him, the velcro easily giving way with the slightest exertion.  

The cool air of the room snaked around him, and goose bumps spread across his nearly naked form.  His boxer briefs seemed a highly inadequate cover for the chill and offered no protection from the blows to come.  

The door opened and they all glanced at the newcomer.  Nikolai came in with a new tripod and a different camera.  

“Sorry I’m late, Pahkan.  I just got this new camera in, and I thought we could use it today.”

Damnit!  Ben hated it when they recorded his torment.  

“Good, Nikolai.  Is this the one that you mentioned with the automatic cloud upload feature?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Excellent.  I’m looking forward to that.  Should make the auctions go much smoother.”

“Exactly. And it can do the live feeds too,” Nikolai added with enthusiasm.  

“Perfect.” Volkov’s expression was one of deep satisfaction.  

God!  How much fucking longer are they going to make me wait? Ben’s calves were killing him.  When he glanced over to Volkov, the man was smirking at him, and Ben got the distinct impression that Volkov knew exactly what he was doing.  

Ben wrapped his hands around the chains and pulled himself up slightly.  He could only do it for a minute or so, but he was able to give his calves some relief.  Still, this was going to get exhausting.  

It took Nikolai a few minutes to get the camera set up and in the best location.  Dmitri was growing almost as impatient as Ben.

“Okay.  All ready to go,” Nikolai assured them.

“Excellent.  Benjamin, are you sure you don’t want something to bite down on?” Volkov asked.

“I-I’m s-sure.” The tremors of fear and anticipation were coursing through him anew now.  Out of the corner of his eye he saw Dmitri smile broadly at Volkov’s nod of approval to start.  

“Dmitri, don’t forget what we’ve learned over the last couple of days.  Give the boy room to breathe.  He’s new here,” Volkov reminded him.  

Fucking damnit, just shut the hell up! Ben thought. 

[misora-msby]

embarrassing moments with inarizaki

inarizaki always looks so cool but you know they’re actually dorks and i am here to provide you the content to show theyre clowns. enjoy the headcanons :)

Kita Shinsuke

firstly. kita shinsuke being embarrased? making a mistake? unheard of.

he’s a perfect man and we all know it.

anyways

you two were having a nice dinner out together. 

it was a pretty fancy place so you decided to dress in a different style today

but you were beginning to wonder if kita liked it or not because he seemed to keep looking past your shoulder instead of at you

he was an observant guy so you were wondering if something had happened behind you

but you couldn’t hear anything weird so you assumed not

you decided to just stay quiet about it at first but now it was beginning to become annoying! 

why wasn’t he looking you in the eye to speak?

midway through your dinner, kita finally spoke up tho

“y/n, your shirt is slipping... yer bra’s showing.”

oh.

right. you were wearing your off-shoulder top.

“o-oh. shin, it’s that kind of shirt, you know?” you had to explain your outfit to ur bf with a pink face.

“oh... that so... well it’s cold these days so if yer feelin’ cold lemme know. i’ll give ya my jacket.”

GOD HES SO PERFECT KITA SHINSUKE I HOPE U MARRY HIM???????

Ojiro Aran

another man with next to no flaws.

but nature says everyone has to make some mistake.

so it was a regular school day, our aran has just come to class from morning practice and there’s still some time left until class starts.

all the girls in class are gathered around a table

he’s not sure why, it’s probably watching an idol video

but ur man wants to be a little romantic!!

plus he just showered so he smells Great uwu

he goes over and hugs you from behind, placing his chin on ur head.

“hey, bb whatcha ya doin”

all the girls gasp.

he doesn’t get whats wrong, it’s not like it’s a secret y’all are dating

pda to this level aint bad either

especially compared to his teammate miya atsumu

“ojiro aran.”

why is your voice behind him

he looks down and nearly faints when he sees he hugged the wrong girl.

to be fair she looked a lot like you from behind, just maybe 1cm shorter.

“i’m so sorry!” he keeps apologising to literally everyone and all the class is giggling bc they never seen their school’s ace so red before.

“didn’t think i’d come back from the toilet and see my bf cheatin”

“IT WAS A MISTAKE! I’M SERIOUS! Y/N U KNOW I LOVE YA!” 

hes so funny i swear

the volleyball team hears of it and it gets even better 

Miya Atsumu

it’s not a secret that miya atsumu, setter of the inarizaki volleyball team and invited to national youth training camp, had a gf

he was very much in love with u 

the whole class knew it because he’d show it off whenever he could too

so here comes valentines day

last year he received like... 50 different gifts from girls and guys aiming to win his love.

you didnt even give him one lmAOOOOO 

but this year, he had been not so subtly trying to hint that “i better not receive any chocolates this year when i’ve got a gf!”

he reaches school and plops into his seat.

there’s an anonymous box of chocolates with “please accept my love, miya-kun! <3″ on it

“the hell’s this?!”

“oh? chocolates?” - osamu who just popped his head into the class to shove into his twin’s face how much chocolate he got.

especially since the blond was off limits, the grey-haired twin had a bigger following now.

“do they not know i have a girlfriend...”

“well, ya might as well eat it. ya dont know who to return it to.”

“that’s like receivin’ their love!”

“no it ain’t. it’s just food.”

atsumu couldn’t argue with that and popped a piece in.

it was very delicious. the chocolate practically melted on his tongue and was the perfect sweetness and was filled with a delicious ganache too.

it was perfect

but he couldn’t accept this!

“it ain’t even good. too sweet and the filling’s sticky.”

“ah. really? is that what you think, tsumu?” you ask from the door where you had been watching the exchange take place.

“y/n! look at this! some weirdo gave me some choco and like... samu said to test it but i’ll toss it out, promise.”

“tsumu, i made that... i wrote it anonymously because i thought you’d know it was me and i wanted to tease you a little.”

“huh.”

osamu: “yeah actually i went over to her place to teach her how to make it.”

atsumu: “you said you went to suna’s place?!”

osamu: “i went there later but i first went to help her.”

you: “anyways if it’s not good i don’t mind if you toss it out...”

tsumu: “NO NO BABE I PROMISE IT’S GOOD”

you: “you just said-”

“BABE I SWEAR IT’S GOOD I JUST DIDN’T WANT TO ACCEPT A STRANGER’S STUFF”

“you’re always so honest though... are you sure?” you were having your fun teasing him now.

“BB PLSSSSSS”

he still cringes at the memory 4 years into ur marriage

Miya Osamu

osamu would DEFINITELY make home made dinner dates a regular thing.

this alone shows he’s the better twin - miya atsumu stan

he loves cooking and eating with you so sometimes when he’s got a day off you guys’ll set aside the afternoon to make a real nice dinner

imagine candlelit dinner with miya dorito body osamu in a suit

of course some fun stuff happens after too ;)))

and today’s your third anniversary!!

so osamu adds lots of ‘natural aphrodisiacs’ to the meal

i’m talkin

garlic bread and soup for an appetiser, a nice juicy steak with garlic and red wine sauce for the main, and chocolate coated strawberries for dessert

mm yummy

you two cleaned your plates completely (it was very delicious) and as you were washing the dishes, osamu comes up behind and wraps his arms around your waist

“yes, ‘samu?” 

“i’ve already prepared us a nice bath with yer favourite scents.” he’s got his head resting on ur chin

“really? thank you~ i’ll be there in a bit”

but he doesn’t let go of you while you’re still scrubbing at the baking sheets.

“osamu, you can let go for now.”

“don’t feel like it.”

“i gotta wash the dishes since you did most of the cooking.”

“mmm, i’ll do it if ya gimme a kiss.”

you roll ur eyes bc what a cutie 

u turn ur head to give him a kiss but suddenly he 

he burps

that garlicy wine smell is just kinda there

“ew! ‘samu!!”

his face is real red but he’s also trying not to laugh because he’s still a dude and this is absolutely hilarious to him

“want another?” he starts teasing

“i’m not getting in the bath with you.”

“wait wait wait i’m sorry, i’ll go brush my teeth and give you a proper kiss”

Suna Rintarou

you two were taking the train home today

it was quite late due to practice going a little longer than usual, so he insisted he walked you back home today.

sunarin can be a good boyf sometimes ok

it was getting a little crowded on the train tho, since people were heading home or going out for dinner

luckily you had already grabbed seats so you were quite comfortable sitting side by side. 

you and suna have the type of relationship were you dont have to talk all the time

silence is v comfy.

he’s just scrolling through twitter on his phone while you’re looking around the car, lost in ur thoughts

suddenly you notice an old lady standing a little bit away from you and you stand up

“baa-san, please take my seat.” you whisper in the crowded carriage

“oh how kind of you. thank you, dearie.” she smiles and takes your seat while you stand in front of her and suna instead.

suna doesn’t realise this exchange has happened tho

(he’s on his phone as usual)

probably starting some fights on twitter

he decides to try to be a little romantic and pretends to stretch his arm around (who he thought was) you.

“rin.” 

why is your voice right in front of him?

“young man, i appreciate it but i’m married.”

suna jumps as he sees someone he did not recognise next to him.

he looks up and notices you had moved.

you’re giggling

the granny’s giggling

atsumu and osamu sitting opposite on the carriage look like they’re going to cry because they’re trying not to laugh

“i was just stretching. really.” he mumbles and crosses his arms, face red as a tomato

he’s so embarrassed.

Ginjima Hitoshi

sometimes the inarizaki vbc would go for an after practice snack at the nearby family mart

they were really hungry after an intense preparation for nationals which was in two weeks so kita insisted they all get something to fill them up on the way home

but lucky lucky ginjima hhehe

you (his classmate who he had a crush on) were working at the cash register today.

“welcome!” you greet everyone as they enter

he cant help but stiffen up a bit 

why are u so cute and cheery today

the 2nd years already know what to do.

“heyy, i think last week i bought ya that ramen right? ya owe me my konbini snacks today!” - atsumu

“yeah. you lost a bet to me last week so u gotta pay up. a pack of jelly fruit sticks please.” - suna

“forgot my money today, mind payin’ for my snacks too?” - osamu

“like hell i’m paying for all of you. especially you, osamu. you eat too much all the time.” 

aran’s noticed what’s going on,

“hey, if it’s just for today you can do it right? if ‘samu don’t pay ya back tomorrow i’ll nag him ‘til he does.” 

“fine...” his basket is full when he goes to the counter.

he’s trying his best not to have a red face while watching u scan the items, ur hair swaying slightly as u look back and forth between the objects and the screen.

“alright. 4,890 yen please!” GOD he hated how expensive it was, that’s almost all his weekly allowance but bc it’s u and ur voice saying it it’s kinda ok

“mm, ok.” he still has his eyes on you while he takes out his wallet and puts it on the counter.

yes

his wallet, not the money

“...” “...”

“excuse me, sir. this is...”

he almost slaps his face wtf he’s so embarrassed.

“s-sorry. just a little absent minded after practice.” he starts pulling out his cash.

“it’s fine! i know how hard you guys practice!” you smile while performing the rest of the transaction and pass him his big bag of goods. “good luck for nationals, ginjima-kun!”

he almost runs out of the store and is about to fight the rest of the 2nd years for watching and (suna) recording

[littlemisslipbalm]

“you make me so angry sometimes”

idk if this gif makes sense, but i feel like it will if you read the story, it just gives me that vibe. 

A one shot I cooked up idk, it’s about Harry and a makeup artist on DWD, it’s quite angsty, idk how that happened, it’s also very long, idk how that happened either, maybe i do a part 2, maybe i don’t idk lmk. Feedback is appreciated, not proofread. REBLOGS help writers tremendously and i love reading whatever you write in the tags its my favorite thing!! Love yall and Merry Christmas!

Word Count: 17.7k | Warnings: ENEMIES to LOVERS! swearing, angst!, some anxiety -like self-doubt, yn being mean to harry kind of a lot, i dont remember, nothing too crazy, Nick Kroll?, lots of conversation

-

When she pictured herself as a makeup artist in Los Angeles, she hadn’t pictured exactly what she was doing right now.

She had expected doing gorgeous makeup for gorgeous actresses or doing wildly fun stuff like in Euphoria. And because of that she had worked her ass off to get where she was today. She had practiced for hours, worked countless hours for free, and networked to the cows came fucking home.

So why the fuck was she using tattoo-strength concealer to cover up the maybe 60 tattoos some asshole musician turned actor had all over?

Don’t Worry Darling was her first major film to work on so she couldn’t complain. She was happy to simply be there. Well she had been. The first day she had showed up 15 minutes early and had worn her favorite power suit she had. It was dark navy with a white lace long sleeve turtleneck underneath. She hoped to look fun but professional.

Hollywood was all about impressions, especially first ones, even when you’re the makeup artist. She had quickly learned that she was one of six makeup artists. One of them being the friend who had helped her get the job, Angie. Angie was like her surrogate mother in Los Angeles that she had met on her first film job for something much less high profile than Olivia Wilde’s second directing project. Her braided grey hair and fabulous jeans had drawn Y/N right in and they had connected instantly.

Since Y/N was deemed the most inexperienced by the head of the makeup department, she was relegated to easier jobs: assisting the other artists on main characters sometimes, mostly dealing with minor characters touch ups (and full make-up if she was lucky), and the job nobody wanted: tattoo coverage.

Harry Styles was one of the leads for the film and besides his minimal acting, everyone knew he was a worldwide rockstar. With the rock and roll life starting off as a popstar life at the ripe age of 16, he had amassed around 60 tattoos in the past decade. Impressive by her standard normally. She usually counted herself as an appreciator of tattoos and their art, finding them similar to makeup and the self expression that came with both forms. Especially since she had a few of her own, but when she walked into Trailer #6 and saw a good amount of Harry’s tattoos, she wanted to murder every artist he’d ever been to.

She had to make an inventory the first day of all of his visible tattoos when he was just wearing boxers. He had been friendly, trying to make conversation, but as the time wore on, they both grew tired and silent. She had to write down the location and a description of every tattoo and as he took off everything but boxers she grew more and more annoyed with his random and dumb tattoos. Some of them were amazing, the eagle, the anchor, the butterfly, and the ferns were probably her favorites. But some of them, she couldn't hold back her rolling eyes and annoyed expressions. The “Big” on his right big toe, a miniscule lock, almost everything on his inner left arm (the packers logo, Pingu, etc.)

She traces at the rose and the ship and then flips his arm out to reveal his inner arm to her gaze. “That is a big fucking bee.”

He snickers, “Y’like it?”

She ignores his question. “For god’s sake, someone is needle happy,” she said as she examined his left arm, taking note of every permanent drawing.

He shrugs his right shoulder, uninhibited by her prodding. “Dunno, beginning to regret some of them.”

“I would hope,” she mutters, scribbling on her paper the various ones she had just seen on his arm. Next was his ribcage ones.

He scoffs, “Oi, it’s not like you haven’t got any.”

“How would you-” She looks at him wide eyed.

“Right…” he takes his right hand and pushes her hair past her ear to reveal three little red line butterflies following the curve of her ear, “There. At least.”

She huffs and knocks his hand away from her. Her hair falling back into its place.

“Maybe some located in a few more intimate places I’m guessing from the red rushing to your cheeks right now.”

“Can you just let me do my job,” she says, not giving in to his teasing or sparing him a glance as she feels his intense gaze on her face. She was studying his left rib cage where a few cool tattoos happened to be.

“You at least have some taste or persuasive artists because not all of these are shit,” she speaks again after just the sound of her pen on the paper filled the trailer.

“Gee, thanks,” he laughs unamused and rolls his large green eyes.

She thought he had some of the biggest eyes she’d ever seen. But she also knew to keep that to herself because he’d either take it as a compliment and think she was noticing him too much or he’d take it as a massive insult and get her fired.

His right hand taps at his thigh, tapping a rhythm she didn’t care to pay any attention too. She just wanted to finish the stupid inventory of the stupid tattoos on this stupid man.

“Take those off,” she says to Harry, looking back at her clipboard again, filling up quickly with her notes.

He stands there, staring at her stubbornly. He was entirely bored with this exercise, especially since his company was some of the worst he’s ever had. She spares him a glance when she doesn’t notice any slipping off of the colorful sweatpants he’s wearing.

She arches a brow at him, her pen tapping impatiently against the paper. “Go on. Can’t imagine you want this to go on longer than it already has.”

He rolls his eyes again, slipping his thumbs into the waistline of the pants and tugging down. Simultaneously, he toes off the dirty vans he seemed to wear everywhere. The fabric pools easily and he steps out of them and discards them on the couch behind him. He’s actually wearing black briefs. She chooses not to notice anything further than that.

“Socks...can stay on,” She tries to say as he begins to peel one off. He stops midway and nods.

She flings his shirt to him, not needing to see his naked torso for another moment, “I know you’ve got some feet and ankle tats, but I also know that you won’t be wearing anything that will expose them. Thank your lucky stars that I don’t have to makeup your feet.”

He catches the shirt easily and slips his arms inside before tugging it quickly over his head and over his expansive shoulders. The ferns disappear out of sight.

“Well then we’re almost done then. Just got the knee ones -”

“And the tiger. That’s gonna be one son of a bitch,” she sighs and examines his legs, not bothering to crouch.

“What the actual fuck dude?” Her tone is exasperate and like she would rather be anywhere else than here.

“I’m sorry?” He sputters, hands on his hips and eyes bewildered.

“Yes. No. Oui. Non. Who are you?” She rubs at her eyes and shakers her head.

“S’a little rude.”

“You’re right,” she semi-rushes out at his serious tone, ready to apologize. When a grin spreads over his face and he chuckles under his breath she really wants to smack him upside the head. He was exhausting. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Thought it was funny at the time. Kind of think it’s even funnier now since it’s got you all mad.” He leans over her shoulder to look at her notes and when she glances at him unhappily he just looks smug.

“Alright,” she finishes the scribble of a description and clicks the end of her pen, “All done. You can get dressed. I’ll see you bright and early for tattoo makeup. It’s gonna take about an hour to do all this, just so you can mentally prepare for that.”

“It was nice to meet you,” he attempts at a friendly and professional farewell. “See you tomorrow…” he trails off as he watches her turn on her heel and walk out of the trailer door swiftly. The door swung shut and bounced a little bit in her wake.

Harry sighed and adjusted his clothes and hair in the mirror. After a moment he shakes his head, an even louder sigh escaping him.

-

“Good morning!” She greets happily, walking into the trailer without a knock. Well-rested and happy at least that she doesn’t have to just inspect a body, she looks around the trailer.

She realizes no one is there and she’s taken aback. First of all, if Harry wasn’t there then he shouldn’t have left his trailer unlocked. And second, he was fucking late, the fucking twat.

She grumbles, setting her coffee on the countertop. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “In through the nose, out through the mouth” she mutters. She knew this was a big opportunity and having a big star like Harry in her corner could make her career. She needed them to get off on a better foot today.

“Good form, I’d say relax the shoulders a little more,” the door swings open carrying the California twang-British accent that she would soon become all too accustomed to.

Harry points at her shoulders and narrows his eyes regarding her in the trailer. She offers a strained smile through the mirror and Harry sets down his personal things on the couch.  

“Alright, well let’s get started shall we,” she smiles and turns to him, gesturing to the swivel chair next to her.

He nods, a twinkle in his eye as he regards her. He’s unsure of the tone and attitude she’s giving him today. She had been feisty yesterday, cordial at times, but mostly biting and witty. He had liked it. It had made the whole ordeal bearable whereas now she seemed to be laying it on a little thick.

“Just your hands and neck today,” she says, pulling out the makeup materials needed and a checklist of the tattoos she needed to make sure were invisible.

“Should only take..a little under an hour today. Just gonna remind you now though, other days we won’t be so lucky.”

Harry chuckles under his breath and rolls his head around his shoulders before sitting in the chair. “Were you tired yesterday?” He inquires.

“Why do you ask?” She throws a glance over her shoulder at Harry. He’s begun slipping off his sweatshirt and yawns as he does it.

“You seem different from yesterday and I’m just wondering which one is the real you.”

She continues working about the room and rolls her eyes to herself, “I’m always the real me. I come no other way, but this morning I woke up and thought ‘this is the job you’ve fucking wanted for ages, so stop being such a bitch so you don’t get fired, you prick’.” She pauses and turns to face Harry. “The ‘you prick’ was directed at me, that was still part of my thought,” she adds.

He throws his head back and laughs. Then he nods, still laughing lightly, “I get that. Sometimes I’m just so in my head and yesterday I was just so fuckin’ bored. Sorry if I got on your nerves.”

“Don’t mention it.” She waves her hand at him nonchalantly.  

Then she moves to inspect his hands and notices the lack of rings, unlike yesterday when she had to make him take them off.

“You have amazing cuticles,” she notices and mentions without any pretences. Harry mutters his thanks, pursing his lips as he watches her work.

She stops her inspection and places the clipboard on the countertop in front of them.

“Could you take your necklaces off? I need to cover up half of the swallows and the years, for when you unbutton your shirt a bit.”

He wets his lips and nods, hands going to fiddle with the clasps behind his neck. He slips off one of the necklaces with ease, a yellow eye beaded necklace that he lays gently on the countertop next to the clipboard. Then he takes his cross and pulls it over his head, no clasp needed.

“Could I put some music on?” Harry asks after five minutes of Y/N working in silence and Harry only being able to stare either at himself, her work, or nowhere.

“I can,” she stops her work for a moment, “Can’t have you messing up the makeup before it sets. Otherwise I’d have to kill you.” Harry can’t be sure if she’s joking or not. Therefore, he was intent on not messing it up.

“Any requests?” She stands at the counter now, instead of seated on a stool working on Harry's left hand.

He shrugs, like he hasn’t got the faintest idea about good music. She refrains from rolling her eyes once again because she feels herself in a test. She wets her lips, sifting through different things in her Spotify and then lands on her playlist titled “it’s your song” named after Elton John’s song. It had some other musicians, a mix of Queen, Bowie, and more and she was sure she would pass the test.

She presses shuffle and She’s Always A Woman by Billy Joel begins to play over her laptop. Harry nods pleased and she wants to shake her head at him.

She can’t hold back the scoff though after a moment of going back to finishing his hand.

“What?” His British accent thickens with his annoyance growing.

“Nothing,” she chirps, intently putting the final touches on his wrist.

“Seriously. What?”

She stands and sets down the makeup. “Can you unbutton your shirt?” She made a note to herself that from now on she’d have to have him take his shirt off before setting to work because if his hands got messed up she’d have to start over. Thankfully he was already wearing a button up this morning.

He stares at her, offering no movement, just inquisitively waiting for her to respond to his original question.

She shuts her eyes, taking another deep breath and then bites at her lower lip. “It’s just...you’re so easy to read.” She fears adding anything else and moves towards him with the makeup hoping to encourage him to unbutton his shirt.  

His right hand deftly pulls at the buttons as he regards her. His eyes are intent on her, she can see him clearly calculating her. Her green paisley button up tucked up into the back of her bra leaving a splay of her stomach. The semi-balloon sleeves cinched at the wrists leading to her slightly ringed hands. The oversized blue jeans that have no holes, just a tiny patch right next to the left pocket. The frayed ends of the pants laying over her rather pristine white old skool vans.

The Boxer fades in as she waits for him to finish the unbuttoning of the shirt. He’s still staring at her.

“Am I?” He finally inquires, voice pitched higher like he doesn’t believe her.

She gives him a serious stare and leans over him and adjusts the collar of his shirt. She adds paper towels to avoid makeup on his clothes.  

“Yes!” She laughs, “And you don’t even think so, which is like...of course.”

He hums, tilting his head back as she sets to work on covering up the swallows. He wiggles his hands that now both rest on the arm chairs.

“I don’t see it.”

“Of course you don’t,” she glances at his face, their eyes meeting for a moment. “You’re Harry Styles. Everyone is in love with this image you created for yourself and it has just enough of your true self that people feel like they really know you, but you also maintain the illusion. So you think you’re this mysteriously amazing, not like the rest guy, but you are just like the rest of them. Obsessed with yourself and rich so you’re deemed eccentric rather than crazy for all the extravagant shit you do. So when you want me to play music and don’t offer any suggestions I know exactly what music I need to play for you to like me.”

“I feel like that last part says more about you than it does me,” he quirks a brow at her, straining his neck to look at her face as she continues to work.

She flushes, his response both better and worse than she expected. She had gotten a little carried away in her response and she had no idea why. She truly wasn’t one to go off on people so easily and especially not with someone she hardly knew, but something about Harry had her on edge. She was just thankful he hadn’t gotten mad at her response, instead he took it in stride. Further proving her point that he was extremely smart and did things purposefully and she saw right through it all.

She grumbles, “It says that all anyone has to do to get close to you is understand the smallest bit about you and you’ll let them in.”

“That is just so completely wrong, Y/N, I hate to break it to you.” It’s Harry rolling his eyes now, unable to move much more of his body as she continues painting on the concealer to remove his tattoos for the movie.

“Fine. Enlighten me on what I got wrong.”

Their argument had all but drowned out their music. They both did love this music and ironically if they would just shut their mouths, they’d probably like each other a lot more.

“Might as well,” he sighs. “First of all, my image is authentic and of course I don’t want to give myself all away. I enjoy my privacy and for everyone to truly know me I’d have to give that up. Which I’m not keen on. So, I regret to inform you but I am the same guy everyone is “in love with”. Second, I know I am a little self-involved, how else would I get here if I wasn’t constantly taking inventory of myself and reevaluating who I am. As a musician, I want to give as much of myself as possible or else it just feels inauthentic. And the extravagant thing, I can’t help that I like nice things and my job has allowed me to afford those things.”

He stops to take a deep breath and she’s working in stunned silence, in disbelief that Harry is even telling her any of this or that he’s spoken that much and so quickly. Wasn’t he notorious for speaking slowly with barely even a sentence worth of actual information. He sounds tired and frustrated, but also, surprisingly, sincere.

He continues, “The music thing. Maybe it was a test, but still it doesn’t mean I give everyone a mile when they say their favorite musicians match up with mine or something. I note that they either did their homework or might be an interesting person to get to know.”

“So which am I?” She widens her eyes.

“Obviously the second even if you’re also making it painfully clear that you don’t like me.”

“You’re smarter than I thought, Harry. I’ll give you that,” she smirks slyly, finishing up the bird coverage now.

He laughs. “Thanks,” he drawls out.

“And I admit that maybe you aren’t as easy to read as I made out, but I think we’re going to have to agree to disagree about the whole being your authentic self. I just don’t buy it. I can see your mind working constantly, you’re not one to just let yourself be free in public. And I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, I’m just saying, you shouldn’t pretend like that’s not what you’re doing.”

Her final thought leaves Harry silent. She pays no attention to his silence or at least she’s actively ignoring it. Instead she tunes back into the music that had gotten them back onto the wrong foot. This was going to be a long few months.

When she’s satisfied with her work, she has them sit there for thirty minutes to give it all time to set before Harry is off to hair and other makeup. They sit there listening to music. Neither of them have spoken again, except instructions from her and Harry’s hums of approval of songs.  

Harry stands up after thirty minutes as she stays behind to pack up some items. Just as he’s about to step out of the door, he turns and calls her name.

“For the record, I don’t think you’re giving me a fair shot. You said yourself that you’re different every day. That every version of you, is you. So I hope you’ll give me the same allowance, every version of me is me. In this trailer, in my music videos, on tv, in interviews, in my free time. It’s all truly me.”

She bites her inner cheek as he ducks his head and exits the trailer, not allowing her any response.

-

“You’re late!”

“Meeting ran over with Nick and Olivia. Sorry,” Harry says as he begins to undress.

It’s the first day she has to cover all of his tattoos. It was going to take forever by all accounts. It had been two weeks since shooting had begun and she had gotten the simple hands and neck down to 45 minutes so she could only dread what his entire body would take.

“It’s fine,” she grumbles, knowing there wasn’t really anything else she could say about him coming late from a meeting with the director and producer.

Over the last two weeks, they hadn’t grown any fonder of one another. Not at all. They at least had gotten into a system though and she was grateful for that at least.

They showed up, Harry got in his chair, she set up the music, and they got to work. Harry would practice lines on some days and he’d tell her that before she turned on the music so there were no interruptions. Sometimes they talked about stuff on set or music or she’d give Harry his line when he was trying to be off script and forgot one. She wouldn’t classify it as pleasant, but they weren’t at each other throats like they were originally.

Trailer 6 had gotten a little homier as the weeks went by, too. Harry began leaving some of his stuff there and he started putting up silly drawings he would make while on set or polaroids people had taken with him while he was there. He tacked up napkins of restaurants that catered the set and wrote funny jokes and quotes on post it notes. His personal assistants sometimes brought in snacks while Y/N was still working and Harry always offered her some. They were usually healthy, but sometimes she’d eat some. Jeff, his manager, had also stopped by on occasion during his tattoo touch-ups that had become a thing after shooting days had grown longer.

On first meeting, Jeff had said, “Y/N? Harry mentioned you.”

She had turned to Harry with an arched brow and he had shrugged. When she looked back at Jeff she didn’t see Harry give Jeff one of the deadliest looks he could muster. She had grimaced and said “Well we spend enough time together for him to know my name. So thank god for that at least.”

They had all laughed and she had gotten back to work on Harry’s wrist.

Today, she needed Harry in his shorts. It was the first day of shooting where his character would be only in his boxers so she had to cover up all his visible tattoos. Olivia had told the makeup department they actually had to cover up his feet tattoos as well. She wanted him sockless in the scene and Y/N had groaned immediately when she made it to the trailer and Harry wasn’t already there.

“But please, for the sake of my job, strip, dude.” She says, arms crossed over her chest and leaning against the counter as she watched Harry set his things down. Her soft green striped cardigan is open, exposing the white tank top sitting underneath. Her bright green shorts hang loose on her, cinched at the waist and folded over once. Her white high top nike’s tap impatiently on the floor, waiting for Harry to get moving.

He nodded, truly feeling sorry for his tardiness, knowing today was a long day. He was anxious and tired. Acting was a different experience to music and he just was really trying his best.

As he began to take off his shirt, he laughed. His arms pulled the shirt over his head and when it popped out from beneath it, he repeated, “Strip, dude,” attempting to mimic her American accent.

He had practiced his American accent in front of her while running lines, but it had a 50’s drawl to it. His acting coach had been drilling him for weeks before shooting and he still liked to practice. The accent he had just down was far off from that and far off from hers too.

“Do not,” she warned.

“What?” He asks innocently and flutters his eyelashes.

She knows his game by now and she knows she should just ignore him. She knows this after fourteen days. She knows this after hours with him. She knows this, but then she’s opening her mouth and playing into his teases.

“Sorry, what’s a word you would know? Mate?” She tries for a British accent with the last word, knowing she can’t win this.

Harry snickers and scratches at his nose with his index finger before starting on taking off his pants. “You’re so Californian.”

“Thank you,” she chirps, moving to sit beside him now that he had settled.

“I like your shorts,” he muses, crossing his legs, likely a little cold.

She glances down at her cotton shorts that showed more of her thighs when she sat for a moment before returning her gaze to his left arm. The longest task of the day was this damn arm.

“Thanks,” she mumbles, “Wanted to be comfortable today. Knew it was gonna be long.”

A smile bubbles onto his face, his pink lips parting to reveal his shiny white teeth behind them. “So true.”

The music is low today. She had chosen Joni Mitchel’s Blue album for the first pick of the day. She had quickly learned Harry preferred listening to albums in order. It tended to make him less jumpy when the same artist came on multiple times like an album. So when she tried to play just an album one day, she found him more cooperative and less irritable.

After thirty minutes of work, she can’t stop noticing how shivery Harry is. It was late October in LA, so it was still warm, but admittedly the mornings could be a little chilly. His shivering was concerning for many reasons. Mainly he was messing up her work and concentration, but she also didn’t want him to get sick or something.

“Do you want me to see if they have a blanket and slippers or something? You look like you’re turning blue.”

Harry turns his attention to her. He had been reading over the script for today again. “That’d be great. I can call…” He trails off trying to think of the name of one of his assistants, but apparently he’s too scatterbrained for it. She assumed it was the hypothermia traveling to his brain already.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll walkie someone.” She says as she grabs the walkie talkie, flicking to the personal assistants channel.

“Hey,” she chirps happily. Harry noted how she talked to other people. So sweet, yet sincere. With him, it was serious and sincere but more biting, callous at times. Less so lately, but she definitely was sharper with him. He didn’t know if it even bothered him anymore. She was engaging if nothing else.

“Is someone free to bring two blankets and men’s slippers over to Trailer 6? I’ve got a naked Jack and I don’t want him freezing before I’m done covering up his tattoos.” She takes her finger off the talking button and glances sideways at him, “Who knows, maybe that would improve his acting. Y’know on second-thought-”

“Alright, alright,” Harry tries to grab for the walkie talkie, but she turns from him holding a finger up signalling him to wait as she listens for a response.

Someone says a simple “On it” and she turns off the walkie talkie and gets back to work.

“I took my finger off the speaker before I said the thing about your acting. Relax, Harry.” She says when he’s still glaring at her. “Just love to see you squirm.”

He shakes out his short chestnut hair, some of it falling over his forehead. Instinctively, she reaches up without even looking and smooths it back. Like she was tucking her own hair out of her eyes, but instead it was Harry’s. She decided to say nothing and was relieved when Harry didn’t say anything either.

She finishes his forearm and moves to his outer upper arm. The rose holds her attention when the PA knocks on the door and she has to race to get it. Nothing could stop her from moving on this work. It was already an hour in and she wanted to scream.

She swings open the door and she wants to die. It was Autumn. Her least favorite PA, of course. She was insufferable and obsessed with Harry. Which was not why Y/N found Autumn insufferable. There were so many more reasons. So many. But that particular character flaw didn’t help her case either. Y/N tried to just take the blankets and slippers from Autumn, but the woman insisted that she come in.

“I’ve got it,” Y/N says.

“No, don’t want you to get makeup on anything,” Autumn’s saccharine voice grinds at her ears and she contemplates cutting them off.

Harry sat in his chair, legs crossed, nodding along to the music, his script discarded on the counter in front of him.

“Hi Harry!” Autumn practically yells, walking right up to him.

Y/N takes a deep breath at the door, letting it swing shut. She bites her lower lip as an attempt to bite her tongue as she walks back to her set-up. The set-up Autumn was conveniently blocking.

“Hello, Autumn,” Harry says kindly, making eye contact with her. “How’re you today?”

“So great! So great! Thanks for asking. How are you?” She points a finger at him like she might poke him and Harry squirms away from her a bit. She, of course, doesn’t notice this.

“Well, thanks.” His eyes flicker to Y/N, who is standing behind Autumn, hands on her hips and attempting not to tap her foot. His tone is clearly dismissive, but Autumn must ignore it. Y/N knows Autumn isn’t as helpless as she tries to come off.

Autumn asks, “Where do you want these?”, gesturing to the two blankets and slippers stacked on top.

“Just on the counter is fine, thanks,” Harry says.

Autumn does as he says and then stands there with baited breath. Y/N’s not sure what she’s expecting. For Harry to ask for her hand in marriage or something? But he just glances between the two women. His own foot begins wiggling in impatience.

“Busy day,” He attempts at dismissing her once again - with kindness.

“Oh my gosh, totally!” Autumn gushes, starting to go off on all of the tasks she has to do. She stands so close to Harry, Y/N genuinely thinks she’s going to sit in his lap. Y/N stares up to the ceiling, begging god or whoever to end her misery right there and then.

Harry sees Y/N’s expression and tries to maintain the neutral expression he’s had for the entirely too long interaction. A smile threatens at his rosey lips that had chapped from the morning air.

“Right, well,” he cuts off Autumn, “Y/N needs to get back to tattoo coverage, I think. So...have a nice day.”

Autumn’s eyes widen like she forgot that there was anyone else in the room and steps back from Harry. Y/N nods, a grimace clear on her face. Autumn gives her the same small she used to get from the popular girls in high school when she happened to be talking to their cool guy friend that they wanted to be more than friends with. Sickeningly sweet and completely fake. She could see the contempt in Autumn’s eyes that swirled just beneath the surface of her perfectly outlined green-ish eyes.

“Okay! You too, Harry!” She begins walking to the door and Y/N takes her seat again, closing her eyes and counting to ten. “And Y/N,” Autumn adds as an afterthought.

“Oh my fucking god,” Y/N sighs, her hands going to rub over her face and through her hair. “That was exhausting. Jesus Christ.”

“What? She’s nice. Maybe a little clueless,” Harry counters. “But she was so nice,” he confirms again, seemingly trying to convince himself of it as well.  

She grabs the slippers and slips them on the ground so Harry can put them on easily. Then one of the blankets that she drapes over Harry’s bottom half. He smiles at the gesture, a ‘thank you’ said in a whisper.

“Please, she knows what she’s doing,” Y/N scoffs, “And she’s obsessed with you!” She grabs the concealer to get back to work, “She was all over you and never took her eyes off of your body. It was like she wanted to touch you or something. It was icky.”

“You touch me,” Harry adds cheekily, adjusting beneath the warm blanket.

She laughs, a smile gracing her lips as she gives Harry a look. He was clever.

“It’s my job to touch you, Harry.”

Harry had really tried to not laugh, but it was just so funny. They both snicker, their eyes meeting for a moment longer than usual.

“Speaking of my job,” she adds after controlling her laughter, “Does she not realize just how long it takes to cover all of your bloody tattoos with this shit to make it look like you’re a pristine skinned 50’s psycho killer?”

She finishes the rose coverup and moves to the ship. Harry nods solemnly.

“It’s true...And it doesn’t help that you’re terrible at it, so it takes a thousand years longer than it should.” He adds, laughter overtaking his serious tone at the end.

“Oh my god!” She shrieks in delight, trying not to mess up her work, “That is so rude! I messed up one time - mostly because of you, by the way. And give me a break, this is so not what I thought I’d be doing as a makeup artist for movies.”

He nods again, muttering “Fair, fair.”

They grow silent, enjoying Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, the album that she had queued after Joni’s.

“The body thing, I just learned to ignore it, I think.” Harry mutters, eventually, but it’s thoughtless, like he’s not revealing anything about himself with the statement. But it kind of shocks her. Her eyes widen and she stops her work to stare at his face.

“Harry,” she waits till his eyes meet hers, “That’s, like, not normal. Are you serious?”

“I mean, I’m very comfortable with my body, like I haven’t minded the last 45 minutes of sitting practically nude in front of you. And I have plenty of revealing photos out in the world. I just don’t notice staring anymore, it’s not, I don’t think it’s what you’re thinking,” he tries to reassure her. His eyes are intent on hers, full of seriousness that hadn’t been there a few moments ago.

“It’s one thing to be comfortable in your skin and another to be desensitized to objectification,” she insists.

He nods. “I know. Thank you. I would let you know if what she had done had bothered me, so don’t worry. I felt completely safe the whole time.”

“Good,” she nods back and concentrates again. “Good,” she repeats once more under her breath. There had been way too many distractions already today and she wasn’t even done with his arm yet.

As she continues to work up his arm, Harry sings along to some of the songs on Elton’s album. He happily taps his feet to the different beats, now safely tucked in soft fluffy slippers. She would never admit just how amazing it is to be in the same room as Harry’s singing. It was truly special to be less than a foot from him and hear him sing just under the unique voice of Elton - who was someone he actually knew, which was equally as cool.

He hit every note and knew every word. She was impressed. How could she not be when a literal rockstar sat before her? This was the first time she was truly starstruck by her charge, Mr. Harry Styles.

By two hours, they had moved onto an album by Dolly Parton and they were both singing. They strangely had no fights today, maybe some snarky comments from both of them, but no outright mean-spirited words were exchanged.

She stood in front of Harry, finishing up the swallows. She had finished both arms and the birds, all she had left was moving down his body. Up next, the butterfly.

“I love this tattoo,” she mumbles, twisting Harry’s standing body to face her and taking her seat again. This left her eye to eye with the butterfly on his stomach.

He makes a surprised face and raises his recently plucked eyebrow at his counterpart. “Oh really?”

“Don’t act so surprised. I told you day one that not all of them are rubbish and honestly they’re all pretty cool. I just was so annoyed that I had gotten tattoo coverage as my job and then I had to go and index them all.” She flicks her eyes up to his sculpted face and sees he’s watching her work. “Plus, I have some butterflies of my own, remember?” She grins.

“Yeah,” he ponders her words, “I don’t think that’d put me in a good mood either.”

He pauses again and she continues to work silently.

“So what’s your excuse for the second day then?”

“You provoked me,” she doesn’t spare him a glance, shrugging like it was the simplest answer in the world.

“Pardon?”

“Let’s not go down this road again, Harry.” She sighs, smoothing over the freshly covered butterfly tattoo. His sternum looked so naked, it was unnerving. Now the ferns.

Harry involuntarily shivered when her fingers traced over the ferns lightly, taking note of the expanse of skin she’d have to cover.

“You’re right,” he agrees, “But agree to disagree on the provocation.”

“Sure,” she says curtly, focusing on his skin and her job.

The expanse of skin that the ferns inhabited was slightly fleshy and especially soft. It bordered where his boxers began and she ignored that part of his body completely. It was of no importance to her and she really had no issue blocking it from her vision, even when it was right in front of her. She finishes one fern with Harry jumping only twice from her cold hands. He couldn’t put his robe on until the makeup had all set for half an hour so he’d have to be cold for possibly another hour still.

She traces the fern that is still visible and Harry shivers. She instinctively shushes him softly and his body quiets. As she works, her hair splays around her shoulders and Harry looks down at her working and doesn’t realize what his hand is doing until it’s too late. His right hand runs over her hair, smoothing it out of her face. It was rarely ever down, so it must have been the novelty of it.

“Sorry, I-” he chokes out when he jerks his hand back.

She sits back, slightly taken aback. Her body flushes just from their positioning and what a hair caress would mean normally in this position, but she’s a professional and she shakes it off.

“It’s fine. We’re even.” She assures him, breaking eye contact with his own wide eyes. “Seems like we’re both hair touchers.”

“It’s just so soothing,” Harry muses. “I think it’s human instinct to touch other people’s hair since it’s so enjoyable for yourself.”

“Possibly,” her voice raises, his thought was definitely plausible. Or maybe they were just two touch starved people who were very much in each other’s personal space 24/7.

At the two and a half hour marker, she gets a walkie message from Olivia’s assistant asking when they’d be done. She had just finished the tiger tattoo, which had been surprisingly easy. It took a while, but Harry didn’t shiver once and neither of them pet each other’s hair.

“Probably 40 minutes, sorry. He has a lot of tattoos and the makeup needs to set.” She says seriously and gets back to work, barely regarding the response of “Yeah it’s fine, just wanted an estimate”.

“Jesus,” Harry moans as she covers up his knee tattoos.

She groans in veiled disgust, “Did I just hit a secret erogenous zone? Is that why you have ‘oui’ there, you creep?” There’s a teasing tone behind the nickname she uses.

Harry laughs and runs his hand over his face, pulling at his jaw and lower lip. His jaw is so sharp, she watches him adjust it. “No, no. I’m just so goddamn tired of this.”

“And it’s not your fault,” he adds, feeling bad immediately after he said it. “It’s actually been nice today, but I’m feeling antsy, like I need to move. I don’t like to sit still.”

“I know,” she says under her breath. She simply nods in agreement.

Finally, the tattoos are all covered up and set. They had talked about George Michael when she got to his ankle tattoos that she hadn’t seen before and they laugh about the tattoos and chat a bit more. She helps him slip on his robe that he keeps in his closet in the trailer and then follows him out of it. They had decided they were hungry and he had been pushed back an hour since he had taken so long, so he had a free half-hour.

As they walked to craft services, they talked about actual things besides work. She was pleasantly surprised by what Harry talked about. It was more than music or the movie. It was the tv show he was currently obsessed with and how he hated LA’s traffic the most out of all of his dislikes for the city. She couldn’t help but grin at his Los Angeles slander. She loved this side of him.

-

Breakfast together after finishing his tattoo coverage became their regular thing. He would come into the trailer, racing from his morning meeting accompanied with tea for two, they’d get his tattoos covered as quickly as possible, and then they’d eat together.

They’d save their “in-depth” chats for breakfast. In early November, he joked about No Nut November and insisted he really wouldn’t have a problem with it - which had made her laugh. They worried together over the U.S. presidential election and meditated together in his trailer to Fleetwood Mac.

Around late November, Harry had requested that Y/N just do his face makeup as well, just to simplify his life a little more and the department had agreed easily. She had to spend extra time on set getting lectured on how to properly do Harry’s makeup, but after two days she stopped getting notes about it. She was so extremely proud and thankful to Harry for doing that.

All he said was: “I mean, you’re extremely talented so I’m not scared of you fucking up my face. Plus, it does make my life easier. Two birds with one stone.”

In late November, he told her about his favorite holiday drinks at Starbucks and what he was getting his mother for Christmas.

When the Vogue cover came out, he laughed over that woman who responded to his cover saying the world needed to bring back manly men. He joked that he was going to really push that from now on, that he was a manly man, and he would sputter with laughter every time he tried to say it with a straight face.

He hand delivered her a special ‘Treat People With Kindness’ sweatshirt that he only had for the cast and crew of the film. Most everyone got them from a PA, but Harry decided since you saw him first in the morning, why not.

He told her about him winning Hitmaker of the Year from Variety when he had left the award sitting in Trailer 6 and about how weird it was to film acceptance speeches in an empty room. His smile had lit up the entire set that day and the day he did his interview on set. He was so smiley she had to bump him with her elbow because he wouldn’t stop smiling at her and it was unnerving.

“Stop that,” She muttered.

“Stop what?” He smiles wider.

“That!” She squeaked, her head shaking as she ducked it to regard his anchor tattoo. “You’re smiling too much.”

“Oh no,” he says sarcastically, “God forbid I be happy.”

“It’s not that,” she bumps his thigh with her elbow, trying to keep her own smile off her face, “Your face is just so intense when you smile. Feels like you’re gonna burn a hole through me.”

He laughs, completely unconvinced, “You just don’t want me to be happy is what I’m hearing.”

She rolls her eyes, “Whatever, dude.”

She saw he was serious about the ‘manly men’ references when the Variety photos came out and everyone and their mom posted the pictures with some variation of that comment as their caption.

She still found that she rolled her eyes at some of the things Harry did, but she genuinely counted him as a friend by the time December had rolled around.

Over three hours, almost always completely alone, doing work for a job you both care deeply about can really make or break a relationship. And that first full-body coverage day had made them stronger together. After that, Harry and her would banter with one another, but there was never anything intentionally cruel. Just friends giving each other shit sometimes. Harry had been right, he had changed her mind about him. And she had realized that that was who Harry was. He was a deliverer. If you didn’t like him at first, he would try and try again until you did, but he did it in a way that wasn’t weasley or anything. It was terribly genuine and she saw it in every relationship he had on set.

On several occasions she had witnessed his friendship with Nick Kroll. A man she had regarded with dislike before the film. She had quickly realized that dislike was misplaced, but she maintained that it was just because she hated adult cartoons - citing that she literally refused to be friends with any person who willingly watched the Simpsons, Family Guy, and/or American Dad and all of those similar shows.

Nick was far nicer and less weird than she had realized. So she quickly shot her friend from high school an apology text for all the Nick Kroll slander she had spouted back in the day. Her friend had rejoiced but also said how jealous she was that Y/N got to see him regularly on set.

Nick and Harry got along great. Harry generally got along better with older people, she noticed when she was introduced to his friends on the somewhat frequent occasion. Trailer 6 was where Y/N saw most of these reactions take place. She would be introduced in the first minute and then she would smile politely and get back to the work of covering up Harry’s numerous tattoos.

Harry would say something simple and Nick, the literal famous comedian, would laugh. In the beginning she’d raise a brow, confused because it truly wasn’t that funny, but as Harry’s friend now, she kept her mouth shut.

Nick would come and sit on the couch while she’d work and eventually all three of them would chat. Sometimes she would get up to go to the bathroom during those morning chats and she would look in the mirror and think to herself “How are you casually talking to these two men right now” and then she’d think “Because you are a boss ass bitch, you got this” and go back out there with a smile on her face.

“Y/N, what are you doing tonight?” Nick asked on the first Friday morning of December.

She looks up from Harry’s cross tattoo that was half covered. Harry was reading, a book casually propped in his right hand and glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. He glanced at the other two in the room. Nick had been getting some work done before he had spoken.

“No plans,” she states simply before getting back to work. It wasn’t full body today, but it was arms and torso, so kind of a lot still.

“You should come over for dinner at my place with Harry,” Nick smiles kindly. His scruff was really coming in today. “To celebrate us almost wrapping the first half of the movie.”

Harry had thankfully freshly shaved before he sat down. It was her least favorite part of her new job. Whenever he came in for touch ups and she had to shave his afternoon shadow. She was terrified she’d cut him and never live it down from her department or Harry. She had no idea which would be worse.

“My wife will be there too, of course,” he adds, hoping to entice her to say yes.

Harry glances between Y/N and Nick again before focusing on his book again.

She purses her lips, finishing Harry’s hand and moving onto the anchor tattoo. “Yeah, I mean, I don’t know why I’d say no. As long as I’m not intruding on the throuple,” she grins up at Harry.

He stares at her with his big green eyes, slightly obscured behind his prescription glasses. He raises his brows and wiggles them a little bit, teasingly.

Nick laughs and slyly winks at Harry through the mirror. Y/N none the wiser as she removes all traces of Harry’s tattoos.

“Great!” He claps his hands and stands up. “We’ll talk or I’ll make sure Harry gets you the info or something. I don’t know, but we’ll figure it out. My wife’s been wanting to meet you,” he smiles again and walks out of the trailer.

She tilts her head at the last part. He talked about her to his wife. Did he really count her as that close of a friend? She was just a makeup artist and he was a producer… She glances at Harry and he gives away nothing. His jaw looks extra prominent and she knows it’s because he’s clenching it. He did that when he was focused or angry, remembering it bulging on the first day they met and how clenched it had been then.

“Unclench your jaw,” she mutters, “It’s not good for you.”

Harry hums and unclenches it.

He stretches his neck by rolling his head around his shoulders and she glances at the movement. His skin is still beautifully sun-kissed and his pores look so soft, only his moles change the texture of his skin. She loves his moles though, they make him especially unique in her eyes. Not that he needed anything else to set him apart from the crowd. Still, she loved them. His collarbone is prominent as he sits there shirtless and she wishes she could reach out and brush at it. But she gets back to work, knowing the only time she’s gonna be brushing near that part of him is when she’s covering dates in those dips behind his collarbones.

“Y’know, I could just drive you to Nick’s tonight,” Harry says, putting his book down and taking off his glasses. He rubs at his eye with his free hand.

“You’re blind and British, how do I know you can even drive yourself?” She asks sillily, pointing to his glasses.

He shakes his head, “I’m serious, Y/N. Aren’t you staying in the same area as me?”

He asks because they had relocated to Palm Springs a little while ago and everyone had gotten rentals and it was hard to remember where everyone was holed up when they weren’t on set.

“Yeah, think so. But you don’t need to pick me up. I have a car.”

“Nonsense. I’ve been to his place before, don’t want you to have to deal with directions, that’s just silly.”

“I guess...” she resigns relatively easily. She had never hung out with Harry off the set or Nick for that matter. It felt surreal, but she knew the right answer was usually just say yes in these situations. So that’s what she says. “Yes, that’d be great, thank you,” she confirms and watches as Harry’s eyes glimmer softly before turning back to his book. A triumphant soft smirk rests on his face.

The words die out between the two of them as she works on. He hums along to the music and continues reading his book. When she’s done with his tattoo coverage and his face makeup, she sends him off to hair and the rest of his day. He gives a flirty wink as he walks out the door and she rolls her eyes in response. She tidies up her kit and then goes to do some other makeup work.

When she wasn’t working with Harry, she was assigned to some of the minor characters and doing their makeup. They were always her second concern, especially now that she did Harry’s makeup as well as his tattoos. As she works on them, she can feel her mind drifting to Harry. Harry and how they were friends now. She was pretty sure, right? They were friends. He had never really said a mean thing to her if she really thought about it. It was her… She had been rude and mean-spirited and he had just taken it. He rarely had even thrown it back at her. He was so good to her and patient and she realized that he had proven to her that he was good. He was better than good, he was kind and loving. Considerate. Wonderful. All of those positive superlatives, Harry filled them. And she had the audacity to be mean to him.

She paused the brush that was adding blush to an actresses cheek.

Lisa, the actress, looks at Y/N confusedly, “What’s wrong?”

Y/N twitches her head, refocusing on her task at hand. The realization of her pausing her work becomes clear as she looks between her hand and the cheek that has not enough blush on it. “Oh,” she breathes. “...I just realized that I was terrible to someone who doesn’t have a mean bone in their body.”

Lisa nods, “Apologize.”

“Yeah, I mean...We’ve kind of moved past the phase where we don’t get along. Like now we’re friends, but the realization just really hit me.” She sighs, picking up where she left off on Lisa’s makeup. “I’ll make sure to apologize next time I see them.”

Lisa smiles.

-

At the end of the day, Y/N realizes she left her tattoo coverage kit in Harry’s room after their touch-up session halfway through the day. She had run off to help with a makeup emergency for a tiny cut on a minor character’s face and forgotten to go back and grab her things. Another roll of her eyes and a huff of breath and then she’s walking back to Trailer 6, a place that seemed like a home away from home now. She knocks, patiently waiting at the bottom of the steps.

Harry swings open the door and props it with his hip. He’s got a toothbrush held in his mouth, slowly scrubbing back and forth with his left hand. His costume is somewhat taken off, he’s still got the pants on with suspenders hanging down, his chest was completely bare and he looked funny with some of his tattoos only being half covered based on what parts of his skin had been showing today. Her work. His skin looked half silky smooth and half tattooed like usual.

His naked skin seemingly left her breathless because as her eyes returned to Harry’s face, she breathed a soft, “Hi.”

“Hey,” a smirk twists onto his face. “Forget something?”

“Yes,” she nods, coming back to her senses and entering the trailer at Harry’s gesture.

She begins to pack up the kit that had been left haphazardly strewn around on his counter. “I’m sorry I left a mess like this, I got called over to something else and forgot.”

“Don’t worry darling,” Harry grins at his joke.

She looks up from her work and sees Harry in the reflection of the mirror. He’s wiping off the makeup from his chest and his beautiful tattoos reemerge as entire images.

She laughs humorlessly, “It gets less funny each time you use that.”

“That’s not true,” he looks at her through the mirror now, his green eyes trained on her face, “Everyone else still thinks it’s hilarious.”

“They’re humoring you and your fragile ego,” she winks and watches as Harry’s smirk twitches from his perfect face.

“You’ve got a very mean disposition, you know that?” He asks.

He finishes his chest and moves to remove the makeup from his left arm, glancing at the mirror every so often to check himself and to flicker his eyes over Y/N’s face.

She genuinely laughs at that, but scolds herself internally for being mean when she had planned to apologize the next time she saw Harry. This was the next time so why was she doing this instead?

“Rewrite sweet disposition for me?” Her voice honeyed. Clearly stubborn and terrible at saying sorry...maybe her and Harry were a better match than she realized.

Harry twists his lips as he slips on his t-shirt he was wearing today.

“Pick you up at 6:30?” He says as his head pops out from beneath the rainbow striped sweatshirt he slipped on top of the shirt. His chestnut hair had been toweled out and was flopping over his forehead slightly.

She sighs and zips close the kit, standing from the seat she had taken at his counter and turning to face him now.

“6:30 is perfect. Thanks again for doing this. I just can’t believe Nick Kroll is inviting me over for dinner!” She smiles, shifting to lean against the counter as she waits for Harry to finish up. She didn’t have to but for some reason she felt like she was in no rush.

“Are you serious?” He’s moved on to changing his pants now and he’s slipping on black sweatpants.

“Yeah…” She blinks and her eyes widen as Harry appraises her expression.

He straightens up after fixing a cuff on the pants and he can’t tell if she’s being genuine or sarcastic. It was always so hard to tell with her.

“I mean, Nick Kroll is like a huge celebrity and I know in the entertainment business you’re not supposed to get starstruck but when I was in college my sister thought he was weirdly hot and my friends and I would shit talk him. I don’t know, it’s just kind of surreal to be having dinner at his place. Like I’ve watched him on tv and now I’ll be eating with him...so weird.”

He shakes his head, beginning on his dirty vans now. A small laugh escapes his mouth and he glances between her and his shoe, scratching his head quickly. “I still can’t tell… It feels like you’re fucking with me right now.”

“I’m not!” She insists, her hands coming out in front of her in a confused fashion. “I used to watch that guy’s tv show then he’s my boss now he’s inviting me over for food? It’s a lot to process.”

“How come it’s not surreal to be having dinner with me then?” He asks semi-joking, a hint of offense tinged within it. It’s visible only in his knitted brow and twisted lip.

“Careful there, sailor. Venturing into some dangerously self-absorbed waters.” Her eyes light up, a quick raise of her brows accompany the shine, and she decides now is her time to head out. Especially as she thinks about getting ready for this soiree tonight. She needed to shower and pick out an outfit with less than two hours to prepare.

Harry sputters at her response and fumbles with his pink shoelace. “That’s not...that is - You’re being unfair. My question is valid.”

She shrugs her shoulders and skirts Harry’s attempt at grabbing at her arm to stop her from leaving. “Okay, Mr. Big Man On Campus. I promise you you’re the most popular boy in school.”

She blows him a kiss and walks out the door as he attempts to get her to come back by calling her name a few times and slightly shouting “C’mon! I wasn’t being insecure. That was a reasonable ask…”

He sighs and shakes his head again. Every interaction would end with one of them either rolling their eyes or shaking their head and usually a sigh on both of their lips. It was exhausting, but exhilarating too.

20 minutes later, Harry receives a text from Y/N: “You’re still picking me up right :))) ?”

He’s in his car, getting ready to finally leave after getting held up with last minute schedule changes that he had to be informed about by some PA that he had forgotten the name of. His lip quirks to the right and he closes his eyes for a second enjoying seeing her name on his phone screen for a moment.

He types back: “Of courseeee”.

“Fab.” She sends back, immediately followed by: “Fanks BMOC ;)”

A full smile rolls onto Harry’s face after he swipes his tongue over his lower lip. “Yeah, yeah, save it for the next guy” he types out quickly before throwing his phone gently beside him and driving back to his apartment. She made him feel young, not that he wasn’t young, but generally his friends didn’t text like she did.

-

At 6:28, she receives a text from Harry Styles - his name in her phone. A name she had never expected to see in her phone unless her Spotify was on shuffle. Yet, instead, his name popped up under messages and it read “Here!” followed by a quick “I think” and then a phone call coming through from the apparently anxious man himself.

“Hello Harry.” Her tone even. She throws little items into her purse, making sure everything she needs is there.

“Could you peek out your window? I’m not quite sure I’m at the right place and people are staring…” nerves laced in his rushed tone.

She ambles to the window and opens up the shade she had closed to change. Below her, she sees a sleek black Range Rover with a slightly disarrayed hairdo and big dark glasses peeking below the windshield. She ignored the instinct to retch at the sight of the Range Rover and peered at the lamp lit sight below her. It was definitely Harry, but she searched for the prying eyes he was worried about and saw none. Well, maybe a few, but it wasn’t a lot.

“I see you, I’ll be right out, dude. Just deep breaths, it’s mostly crew staying here right now so they’re just seeing that it’s you, another guy they work with. They won’t come up for pictures...I would hope.”

She hangs up with no farewell, snatches her purse from its place on the bed and races out the door. Harry smiles anxiously at her when she stands next to the passenger’s door and he unlocks it. She bites her lip and raises her brows, waiting to hear if anything terrible happened in the minute and a half it took her to come downstairs and out to the car.

“Hi,” he exhales.

A smirk crawls onto her features and her eyes sparkle with a bit of a childish glee that normally she didn’t exhibit as she glances at him. “Hi.” She says quietly. “Alright big boy?”

“‘M fine.” He huffs but balks at her smile that she maintains while she stares at him. “What?”

“Just happy to see you, I guess,” her smile returns after speaking and Harry glances between her face and the windshield in front of him.

He can’t tell if she’s being serious or not once again. But he fears that conversation of her either ridiculing him for thinking she is serious or being offended that he still can’t tell. Instead, he will keep his mouth shut. For the most part.

“Happy to see you, too,” his lips create a closed mouth smile quickly before turning out of the parking lot.

She watches him. Their first time together outside of work. And they were friends. She needed to get used to simply thinking that. He picked her up to take her to dinner with her other friend and his wife. This was normal life, just with big names behind those terms of relation. Jesus, she always said it didn’t bother her to be around celebrities so why did she think about it so damn much?

She twitches her head and refocuses on Harry and his driving. His jaw is clenched again and she wants to reach out and sooth it herself. Instead she starts to open her mouth to correct him, but stops herself from that as well. They weren’t at work and it didn’t feel like something just a friend would say right now. She refocuses on the view of his eyes that are barely visible while he regards the road. His large eyes that she had grown acquainted to are surveying what he’s doing, every so often drifting to the right side of the road to check out the lane beside him. But then, always back to right in front of him, leaving a crescent of green visible to her.

“Can feel you staring at me…” His voice sounds like it’s rolled around in gravel after the long work day. It makes her wonder if he’s supposed to have a vocal rest when he’s not at work, but then again it’s the weekend now so maybe it was fine. Maybe she should ask him. Or maybe she should stop worrying so much about him.

“Have I got something on my face?” His low register bumps her from her racing thoughts. He doesn’t take his eyes off the road, but she can see he’s widened his eyes in wonder.

“No! Of course not, I just was...making sure you weren’t going to crash us or something.” She grasps at straws, desperate to not be caught by Harry.

A low chuckle bubbles from his chest and he spares a small glance over at her bundled up in his passenger seat. She matches his gaze with something of distrust hidden behind her eyes. She hopes to convey that she’s being silly and when Harry turns back to look at the road unassumingly, she feels like she has won. The harmonies of the beginning of a Queen song take over the silence, Harry’s spindly fingers thrumming against the wheel.

They arrive at the Kroll’s Palm Springs residence at 6:50. 10 minutes early and the two twiddle their thumbs for a few minutes, trying to pass the time and not intrude earlier than they were supposed to. She appreciated that Harry liked to be timely but not early, similar to how she was.

“So what is the fascination with Range Rovers?” She queries, leaning against the door’s armrest. The back of her head touches against the semi-tinted window.

Harry shifts in his seat, seat belt no longer constricting him and no road requiring his attention as they sit in the driveway. He rushes a hand through his hair and lets a single strand of hair fall over his prominent forehead.

“Dunno,” he shrugs his shoulders and allows a hand to fall onto the steering wheel absentmindedly. “I don’t really prefer them anymore, but when I’m in LA and doing work, it makes things easier. My other cars are a little flashier...have more privacy in this.”

“Yet the effect is similar,” she muses.

Her head tilts to take in Harry’s appearance, sharp black silky button-up and dark green plaid slacks, and she rubs a hand over her jaw. His eyes flicker to the movement and attempt to really take it in, even in the dim glow of the lamp light outside barely peeking into the dark interior of the car.

“Effect?”

“Y’know…” She arches her brow at him. He feigns innocence or possibly the expression is genuine. She’s begun to realize Harry was as genuine as they came, but she just didn’t think he was that unaware. An assumption that was likely correct, but even Harry liked to pretend he was a completely unassuming individual.

“Forget it,” she finishes when he gives no indication that he knows what she is hinting at. She doesn’t want to get into it with him again. Especially when he plays at this game where he has no idea what she’s talking about. It made her feel like she was crazy for thinking he made these calculated decisions to get his desired outcomes.

They move on, neither of them quite sure what the other was getting at in that conversation. The two of them walk into the house a minute before their expected arrival time side by side and are greeted happily with Nick and his wife. They’re ushered in and Y/N is happily received by the happy couple.  

“So, Y/N, how’s it been for you working with these two? I know they can be more than a handful - especially together,” Nick’s wife, Lily, asks after a sip of wine.

The group of four had been eating for a while with Nick and Harry bantering for quite a bit at the beginning about whether or not Harry would be willing to hand feed Nick. The answer was settled at “another time”.  

Harry seems to have a very specific habit of watching whoever is speaking - no matter what. So after Lily has finished speaking, his gaze flickers to Y/N, the person his brain expects to speak next. He watches her attentively as she wipes her mouth on her napkin before speaking.

Her hair was styled differently tonight than it usually was on set, she had it down rather than up in a ponytail or braids. He hadn’t had time to really look at her when they had been in the car, his mind occupied with stress and exhaustion that he refocused into driving and deep breathing. Now, in the comfort of a trusted friend’s home, he was far more relaxed and able to truly take in her appearance, which he couldn’t help but think was beautiful. He’d have to tell her that at some point. That he thought she was beautiful. Not that he didn’t see her on set and think she was beautiful...he just hadn’t really thought about it before. She was his wily makeup artist who was critical of him most times, but occasionally sweet, who had an amazing taste in music and good aesthetic style. The beauty part of it all, he guessed wasn’t something integral to their relationship before.

But now he was sitting beside her at the Kroll’s nice dining table and she had her hair splayed in front and behind her shoulders with one side tucked behind her ear and her outfit fit her impeccably. The top she had on had capped sleeves that cinched with buttons at her delicate wrists and a severe drop to create a small sweetheart neckline just above the curve of her breasts. It was silky and shiny, a blush pink that complemented the high waisted dark grey slacks that flared over shiny black boots that he wasn’t sure where they ended beneath the pants.

“Well,” she starts, chuckling under her breath when she meets Harry’s stare, “Harry and I spend a lot of time together, covering up all his tattoos, and he yaps a lot. So, it’s actually pretty refreshing when Nick comes in, because Harry’s then talking half the normal amount.”

He huffs a scoff, while Lily and Nick laugh happily. Nick interjects an “ouch” for the bite she just took out of Harry, but she thought it was fine, he can take it.

Harry thought to himself that if she can serve it, then she can definitely take it. His eyes remain on her as he opens his mouth to speak, but then look at Lily when words actually come out. “Well, Y/N, she thinks she can read people really well, but it’s actually quite the opposite. She had me completely wrong when we first met, so I talk now in hopes that she’ll really understand me.”

His head tilts to her when he mentions her name, but otherwise doesn’t glance her way away again. He scrunches his nose at the end of his comment, implying he converses with her out of pity.

It’s her turn to scoff and stare at him unamused. Nick and Lily share a look, unsure of what was going on, they had concocted this dinner date idea in hopes to set the two up but the way this conversation was going, they seemed to be pushing each other further and further away from one another.

“That’s simply not true,” she says curtly and takes a sip of her quickly emptying wine glass.

“Which part?”

“Almost all of it, I’d say,” her eyes glaring back at him, fiery with a disdain he hadn’t seen in awhile. “You’re proving my original perception of you with every passing second,” she adds.

“Care to elaborate exactly what the original perception of me was for the class,” his eyes are wide and wild, any extra adoration he had started to feel towards her slipping away just as quickly as it had come, like a wave along the beach.

“You know, so why don’t you?”

“I want to hear you say it,” he grits out the command.

She shifts in her seat, glancing at Nick and Lily who are watching on and she has a feeling she won’t be getting an invitation again anytime soon. Lily gives her a semi-reassuring smile like she was sorry to have asked the question at all, but Y/N knows this is kind of her fault, not that she would ever admit that. Her comment could have been taken innocuously, but Harry’s pride wouldn’t let it slide. Like she said, she should have known better, the weeks of friendship were flying out the window and she was helping them along.

“And what if I don’t?”

“Have fun calling an uber at this time of night,” he shrugs, malice dripping in his tone.

She truly was taken aback at this. A slight sound of shock leaving her mouth. Harry was many things, impatient and anxious usually, but downright cruel with her, she had yet to see it. Arrogant and pompous, definitely, but this wickedness that was starting to creep from the shadows worried her. But the little fiery demon within her wasn’t going anywhere either - yet she might back down to save herself some money and hassle.

“Fine,” she raises her brows in a challenge to him and restates her original take on him - possibly adding a bit extra malice in her phrasing, “You are a shell of a man, held up by the people around you, creating the illusion of a completely genuine and down to earth rocker who dabbles in acting, philanthropy and all around goodness. No one’s ever had a bad experience because no one’s ever truly met you. Not the real you.” She takes a deep breath as she shakes her head in disbelief now, a sarcastic laugh leaving her mouth, “And I thought, I really thought, that I had been wrong. Because these past months you really fooled me with your sweet smile and deep eyes. But when it comes down to it, you tricked me just like everyone else.”

Harry stares at her blankly and she shakes her head once more, feeling foolish. For thinking Harry was someone he wasn’t. For thinking the past few months had been real. For thinking that tonight would go off without a hitch. And the shit part of it was that she had really hoped that all of it was true. She wanted this to be her life, but her instincts had been right. Beware of the picture perfect because it always is just a mirage of deceit and lies.

“All I’ve got to say is you’re a damn good actor Harry, so at least you’ve got that going for you.” Then she pushes back from the table and stands, turning to Nick and Lily. “I really am so sorry, I understand that you probably want me to leave, so I’ll just be going,” her voice faltering at the end, she wasn’t as strong as she liked to pretend and she was pretty sure she just ruined her chances of working again in Hollywood. You’d have to be an idiot to be an enemy of Harry Styles and she feels like she just became his first.

“No!” Nick says quickly, standing too, “I think things just escalated really quickly and some things were said that both of you didn’t mean. Um...just, let’s take a few minutes to cool off. Harry could you and Lily deal with the dishes and I’m going to talk with Y/N alone.”

Everyone nods and Y/N follows Nick down a hallway, a little confused but following after he beckons her with his hand. They go out a side door and end up on a porch in the backyard. He stoops down and opens a little sitting mailbox she didn’t see and pulls out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He places one between his teeth and then offers one to her. She accepts, not usually a regular smoker, but right now seemed like a fair time to indulge in the bad habit. She needed to calm her rapidly beating heart.

He lights the cigarette for her when he sees her shaking hands and then in turn lights his own. They stand on the porch beside each other and stare out into the dark night sky.

“Well, this wasn’t how tonight was supposed to go,” Nick starts, after a few exhales of smoke.

“No,” she laughs nervously, her foot toeing at the wooden slate on the porch. “I shouldn’t have tried to make a joke.”

“No one’s to blame,” Nick says quickly, glancing at her, “You and Harry...you both have really strong personalities and I don’t think either of you are used to being challenged.”

She nods along, she definitely had to agree after the argument they had both willingly gotten into in front of other people.

“I think that can be a really good thing, challenging each other, because then you two can both grow. But what happened in there was more of a battle to the death rather than a friendly spar.”

“Yeah,” she exhales, flicking at the burning cigarette between her fingers, “I don’t know why he gets under my skin sometimes in a way I’ve never dealt with and it’s kind of uncomfortable so I lash out, I guess.”

Nick stays quiet, taking a drag of his cigarette.

“Ugh,” she groans, “I wish I hadn’t done that. We were doing so well, it’s like I don’t even really know what I’m saying, it’s like I can’t handle a friendly spar, I always end up going in for the kill - as you put it.”

She rubs at her face with her free hand and then takes a drag herself. Nick bites at his lower lip, trying to think of a solution.

“Y’know? Lily and I had concocted this plan to try and set you and Harry up tonight,” he says slowly, revealing the plan that had clearly been taken off the table as they just needed to attempt to salvage cordiality.

“Really?!” She’s in complete disbelief and slight dismay that the plan was seemingly ruined.

“Well,” he sputters, “When the two of you aren’t throwing verbal fireballs at each other, you’re actually quite sweet to one another. Those fond little glances you hope no one sees, well he does that too, and you both fail miserably because I see it all the time. I’m sure plenty of people do too.”

“Oh,” she states, visibly deflating. She looks to the ashtray conveniently on a table behind her and presses out the rest of the cigarette. “Should probably talk to him, huh?”

Nick nods, stamping out his nub of a cigarette as well. They go back inside and into the kitchen where Lily and Harry have plated dessert. Harry looks a little sheepish, likely having a similar conversation with Lily and she wouldn’t be surprised if her expression looks similar, if not a bit more flushed from the outdoor chill.

Lily murmurs that she and Nick are going to eat their dessert in the living room, a fair bit away from the kitchen and the two now deflated counterparts nod and then stare at each other, knowing what they need to do.

“Can we talk?” Harry rasps out, his voice even lower as he speaks softly, a mere foot away from her in the kitchen.

She nods, but moves further from him to lean against the counter and tuck her hands behind her. She’s lost her appetite and doesn’t want Harry to see her shaking digits.

He’s ducked his head and a stray curl falls over his forehead, laying there softly. He doesn’t move to fix it, just stares at his feet until she begins to talk. He can’t not look at her face when she speaks.

“So…” She slowly starts, not enjoying the tension in the room. Her eyes can’t meet his though, his stare dark and unnerving like usual, but almost painfully so now. “I can start.” She kicks at the tiling on the floor like she had done outside as well, trying to not think about the eyes trained on her right now. “I’m sorry I lashed out on you, Harry. I didn’t mean what I said, it was just a heat of the moment response.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Harry says immediately once she finishes speaking, “I shouldn’t have gotten upset over a silly joke and brought up a sensitive subject. Then it escalated…”

“Yeah, I really liked the friendship we’ve garnered these past few months and I just can’t believe I almost ruined everything - including my career…” she squeaks at the end and tears start to roll from her eyes. “Oh god,” she is hit with the gravity of all that she almost ruined as Harry stares at her again. “I’m so sorry, Harry, I really am. Do you forgive me? I don’t think I could stand it if you didn’t.”

She stands there and feels sobs wrack through her and her hands go to cover her face out of embarrassment. She had caused a scene and now she was making another one. In front of Harry.

In an instant his arms are wrapped around her frame and he’s hushing her cries. They had never hugged before, but now seemed like as good a time as ever. His arms were strong around her and she pressed her face into his chest, not caring at all about how she looked or whether this was worse than getting in a fight and running off.

“Of course I forgive you,” he says and then begins repeating her name over and over, trying to soothe her. He definitely had been hurt by her words, but it seemed like she was more upset about the whole situation than he was and he didn’t think bringing up what specifically had hurt him would help her frame of mind.

She settles after some time, her whimpers and tears subsiding after being rocked into a more peaceful mindset with the help of Harry’s calming voice and reassuring embrace.

“I really am sorry,” she whispers again.

Harry pulls his neck back and his head off the top of her head to look at her face. It was tear stained and her eyes were glassy, lips slightly puffy. He gave her a soft tight-lipped smile. “No more apologies,” he states sternly and then softens again at the slight quiver in her lip. He pulls from her a little more, leaving her at arm's length, with his hands still attached to her hips, fingers slipping over the plaid fabric. “I meant to tell you this earlier, before things…” he stares at her face again and she holds it this time, “You look beautiful tonight.”

She scoffs and her eyes immediately drop to her feet, “Definitely not anymore.” She doesn’t believe Harry.

“‘M serious,” he insists. His right index finger goes to rest beneath her chin and brings her face up to look back at him.

“Sure,” she says, still not convinced but not sure how else to respond. She feels herself warming at all the positive attention he’s pouring into her.

His gaze won’t falter from her face, he’s intent upon making her understand him. He whispers her name, “Accept the compliment.”

“You’re stubborn,” she notes.

“So are you,” he counters quickly.  

“Fine, thank you,” she sighs when he won’t stop giving her that look of his. That look that makes her want to melt into the ground because it feels like she’s the only person in the world. “Though you looked especially good tonight, too,” she adds, her hands rubbing over his shoulders softly.

“Thank you,” Harry states lowly, the words only traveling to her ears. His hands fiddle with the sides of her top, thinking about the night and where they were now. Her eyes were red from crying and overall she looked tired beyond her years. “Do you want me to take you home?”

“That’d be nice.”

They make a quiet farewell to Nick and Lily, as well as apologies from both her and Harry. They don’t speak in the car and the music plays loud enough for it to not seem unreasonable for them to be silent. Harry’s hands don’t tap against the steering wheel, they sit in their spots stoically doing their job and nothing more. She watches the window, legs crossed and hands clasped in her lap. She’s thankful for the music because she knows that even though they had talked, it wasn’t enough. What she had said was hurtful and one apology wasn’t enough for how she had behaved. She didn’t think her and Harry would be the same after tonight, but the silence made it possible for her to pretend none of it had happened.

Just as Harry’s car is pulling up the apartment complex that is far darker now, the harsh splatter of rain begins to fall on the pavement and the sleek black car the two are still sat in.

“Oh,” she comments offhandedly, just responding to what she had noticed.

The rain grows louder when Harry parks and then turns off the car. He glances at her for the first time since they got into the car. She registers the look out of the corner of her eye, her face still looking out at the rain. She loved the rain, but there wasn’t always a lot in Southern California, especially not in Palm Springs. It seemed that tonight was different.

“Well,” Harry breaks his silence, she thinks that’s her cue to leave and unbuckles her seatbelt, but he continues. “This certainly wasn’t how I expected this night to go.”

She stops moving, her hand hovering over the handle of the door. She sits back and settles into the seat, feeling her teeth bite into the plush of her bottom lip.

“That’s what people keep saying,” her eyes remain on the rain hitting the front of the car, the splatters of seemingly black liquid that form when the clear rain touches the onyx hood of the car.

“Huh?” Harry grows perplexed at the rather wistful tone of her and how she won’t look at him again. He was still hurt, but he had hoped them talking in the kitchen had straightened some things out. During the car ride he hadn’t wanted to talk, but it didn’t mean he was still angry with her. Just confused, and growing further confused by the second.

“Oh,” she repeats, “Didn’t Lily say? Her and Nick concocted that dinner in hopes to set us up.”

Harry hums, knowing that because Nick had left out a little part of that plan. That he had been a part of it. He had been talking with Nick about getting to know her better outside of work and how Nick had thought it’d be a good idea to have dinner so he had told Lily and they set it up like a casual dinner party. Harry didn’t know how to respond because her knowing that he was in on the plan might just make matters worse. He really didn’t think things could get much worse, but it seemed that they always managed to make it happen so in the end he decided to keep his mouth shut.

“I don’t know if we’d ever be able to work out differences out for that,” she decides to continue, when Harry stays quiet. She scans the interior of the car and watches Harry for the briefest moment before going back to looking out the window. “Nick said that we challenge each other to grow, but all I see us do is hurt each other.”

Her voice is just above the rain pattering outside the car and Harry thinks it sounds almost melodic if it weren’t for the sadness laced in every word.

“I disagree,” he states before wetting his lips.

“Of course you do,” she laughs in spite of herself.

“Even after all these months together and you still don’t get it. I like you.”

“You don’t like me, I don’t know how you could ever like me,” she shakes her head. “We just...we get under each other’s skin. You can make me so angry sometimes and I know I make you angry too. And when we’re not angry, we’re focussed on something that doesn’t have to do with ourselves.”

“I don’t think what you feel for me is anger,” Harry insists, “Just because something feels burning and fiery, frustrating even, doesn’t mean it’s anger.”

His body shifts closer to the center divide and she turns to face him finally. His eyes are extra dark in this lighting, which is barely there from a streetlamp a ways off. She longs for the comfort of his light green eyes, the soft pale glow of the moss that seems to have been trapped within his iris. Maybe for that reason she unknowingly leans closer to him.

“Then what is it?” She whispers, eyes blinking slowly as her breathing grows strained.

“Passion.”

Immediately, her head is tilting to meet his lips. Her mind knows one thing, she needs to be kissing Harry right now. And then she is. His left hand goes to cup her cheek as his lips attach themselves to hers. His soft lips press to hers in a long searing kiss. They stay there for a moment, pressing all of that passion and frustration into the kiss.

She presses impatiently forward, her lips starting to move more, wanting to kiss him deeper. Harry obliges, parting his lips and kissing her more vigorously. He licks into her open mouth and smiles at the sound she makes in appreciation for his actions.

She’s shifted to have herself kneeling on the leather seat and she’s leaning over the console. One of her hands finds purchase on Harry’s thigh and grasps tightly, her other at the back of his neck, pressing him closer if it were possible.

His chest is pressing against hers as he pulls her closer. He kisses her and his fingertips rub softly at the apple of her cheek. Eventually they run behind the shell of her ear and trail down her neck.

Eventually, she pulls away and stares at Harry. She watches as his eyes flutter open gently. His soft eyelashes dust his cheeks before moving away, allowing his eyes to peer at her in the dark.

Her breathing feels a little irregular after the kissing and she’s sure she is heaving her chest slightly, likely mirroring Harry’s chest as well.

“So, where to now?” She inquires, lips quirked up at her suggestion.

Harry giggles and scratches his nose against his index finger.

-

Harry doesn’t stay the night, he walks her up to her apartment door though. He kisses her chastley in front of her door and wraps an arm around her waist as he does so. He bids her a goodnight and a promise of seeing her soon.

They don’t see each other for a month. Both of them had been so blissful after the endorphins of kissing their person that they had forgotten that filming had wrapped. They weren’t set to work for a month. Harry texted her the next morning informing her that he’d be in England until filming resumed. She was still going to be in California, filming was moving back to Los Angeles, so she’d be back in her place there. Her family knew she was working, so they had sent her presents ahead to her place instead. Angie, her only true friend in the area, was spending her time with her actual family and Y/N didn’t want to intrude.

So the holidays were going to be spent alone. Those four weeks alone passed surprisingly quickly. She practiced techniques on herself, bought a tiny Christmas tree like the one in A Charlie Brown Christmas, watched A Charlie Brown Christmas and just about every other holiday movie possible. She fell in love with young Hugh Grant and Colin Firth for the thousandth time. She sang carols to herself and decorated her place with decorations from Target. She jammed out to the new Miley Cyrus album and held dance parties for herself in the house. She baked cookies and even attempted a trifle after watching a Great British Bake Off episode. She did and she did all in hopes that her mind wouldn’t wander to the guy who hadn’t called.

Harry texted occasionally, but it was infrequent at best. He was a busy person, she knew that. She knew who he was. And she didn’t want her mind to have enough time to feel sorry for herself. For her to think that she was just somebody to pass the time with while at work, because if she stopped doing things that’s where her mind would wander. Why did her mind spiral like it did? She had no idea, she’d always been like that.

His absence, their separation, made her question if her own feelings were even true. She wondered if when she saw him he would act as if nothing had happened. As if he hadn’t said their relationship was passionate and she had kissed him until she couldn’t breath.

Too much time alone, she needed some fresh air. On January 2nd, after an uneventful night at home and a lackluster countdown washed down with cheap champagne, she decided to go and walk around near her place. There was a coffee shop that wasn’t extremely expensive that she also liked that she figured she would get coffee from. After a brisk walk, she walked through the store's doors and ordered an iced green tea. As she waited, she watched the other customers around her, wishing to see a friendly face, someone she knew. And seconds later, she was met with half of that wish. Someone she knew, not necessarily a friendly face.

“Autumn.” She states with a grimace when someone taps her on the shoulder and she spins around.

“Y/N? It is you!” Autumn, one of the PA’s from Don’t Worry Darling who was especially in Harry’s business, exclaims overly happy as per usual.

Y/N bites the inside of her cheek and gives a tight lipped smile, trying her best to be cordial.

“How’s your holiday been!” Autumn asks.

“Great. You?”

“So great!” She’s quick to lean closer and say in a hushed tone, “But I miss working on set, especially getting to see that Harry everyday. He’s just so gorgeous.”

A breath gets stuck in Y/N’s chest at the mention of Harry’s name. Her brows can’t help but raise a bit at Autumn’s comment. Even lowering her voice didn’t make it feel alright to talk about Harry like this. He was her friend after all.

“Sure.” Y/N nods abruptly, realizing Autumn wants some recognition of what she’s just said. Y/N’s eyes glance around the room, hoping for an out like her drink is ready or something - no such luck.

“I mean,” Autumn keeps talking, of course, “You’re so lucky. You get to see him shirtless, like what? Everyday practically? Don’t tell me you don’t miss that just a little bit!”

“I miss working,” Y/N says, avoiding what Autumn is trying to get her to say. “And Harry’s my friend, could you maybe not talk about him like that with me?”

Autumn’s eyes widened in shock, her lips parted dumbfounded by her co-worker's response. Y/N’s name is called for her drink and she’s thankful for the serendipitous nature of that sound getting her out of the awkward situation she had just been in.

When she gets back to her apartment, she surprisingly has a text from Harry himself. She’s always telling everyone; speak of the devil and he will appear, in one way or another. It’s a Happy New Year well wish followed by a separate text asking how she was.

It was sent a minute ago so she decides to try and give him a call. She preferred talking on the phone over texting.

It rings a few times and then, again surprisingly, he picks up.  

“‘Lo?” His voice is nice and deep and sounding extra British after his weeks surrounded by family and such.

“Harry,” she sighs contentedly.

“Happy to hear your voice,” he says her name and she can tell he’s smiling just like she is, from ear to ear.

She bites at her lip, hearing him say her name.

“I’m well, thanks,” she says after a moment of happy silence.

“What?” Harry laughs, confused.

“You texted asking me how I was and I called to respond.”

“Got it,” Harry chuckles, and she hears him shuffling around, likely sitting down on something.

“How are you?” She continues.

“Good, starting to wind down for the day,” he lists off the things he’s been doing over the past few days. Some of it work related, some of it family activities. All of it fun, he insists. “What did you do today?” He finishes, knowing she was an avid activity doer based off of the snaps she had sent him over the past few weeks.

“Tidied my place, went to the coffee shop and got iced tea…” she tries to think and then she gasps, “Oh! And I saw Autumn, one of the Don’t Worry Darling PA’s -”

“The one who’s obsessed with me?”

“Exactly!” She laughs, “And I may have kind of told her off… accidentally.”

“Accidentally told her off?” Harry repeats, incredulous. “How’d you do that?”

“Well,” she doesn’t want to tell him the rest, but there’s also a tiny part of her that really does, “She was gushing about you, which, ew. And then she asked if I missed seeing you shirtless everyday.”

“Well do you miss seeing me shirtless?” Harry smirks.

“Oh shut up!” She’s quick to reply.

“So you do?”

“If I really wanted to see you shirtless, all I’d have to do is type in “Harry Styles sh” and it would come up,” she rolls her eyes even though she knows he can’t see them. “Wouldn’t even need the whole word. Guaranteed.”

“Uh-huh?” Harry questions still, “If you want me to send you shirtless pictures that the rest of the world hasn’t seen, Y/N, all you have to do is ask.”

“I do not want you to send me shirtless pictures of yourself!” She exclaims. She feels like jumping out of a window right now. This conversation had escalated so quickly and she felt herself flushing, maybe even perspiring a little bit. And she also knew that she also would probably like it if he sent her shirtless pictures, which made this whole thing worse.

“Offer stands,” he says, smug as he normally was, happy he got to banter with her again. It had been dull without her, if he was honest with himself. “If you ever find yourself in need, just send a cheeky text and I’ll whip one out for you, no matter where I am or what I’m doing.”

“See this sounds like you’re saying something sincere, but really you’re just telling me you’ll send me nudes at any time.”

“No one said anything about nudes!”

“Shirtless, nude, sounds like you’re getting too caught up in the details, hon.”

“No!” He protests, “You’re the one who’s supposed to be flustered right now, not me!”

“Aww, you’re flustered,” She coos.

Harry groans. “Whatever. I’ll be back on the 8th, be ready to go out on the 9th. I’m taking you on a proper date.”

“How do you know I’m going to say yes?” She bite her lip again, she’s really sweating now. She couldn’t believe he had just asked her out on a date out of nowhere. Out of them just joking about nudes. Maybe she didn’t know Harry as well as she thought.

“Because you called me,” he says confidently.

“I call everyone.”

“But I don’t offer shirtless pictures to everyone.”

“That has nothing to do with me saying yes to this date.”

“Or does it?”

She laughs at his words, at how his voice still manages to convey every facial expression and quirk of his lips. She knows there’s a smile on his lips as he stares in the distance, imagining her face just as she is his.

“Yes.” She smiles.

“Yes!” He repeats happily.

She hears him stand up and spin around possibly and she chuckles slightly, amused at the silly man across the world who had seemed to have stolen her heart.

“See you soon, Harry.”

“Not soon enough.”

-

On the Saturday of their date, Harry insists on picking her up. He meets her at her door and winks at her after pulling away from their short hug. He laces his hand in hers and she follows behind him as he all but drags her to his car that is downstairs. He seems giddy. His hair has grown out in the month he’s been gone and she knows they’ll cut it when filming resumes. He’s wearing Gucci flared blue jeans - she knows from the big logo on the bottom left pant leg - a ‘Waiting for Sunset’ graphic tee beneath a black cardigan with little animals and items knitted in it. And of course, his dirty ass vans. She had hoped that maybe Christmas would bring him a fresh pair from someone, but it seemed there was no such luck.

Either way, he looked good and upon scanning his outfit, she was pleased that she had dressed correctly for the occasion, knowing one of the sins of Los Angeles was being improperly dressed wherever you might go. Harry had said casual, but casual can always mean so many different things. She got it right with light wash high-waisted levi’s, a brown cream rib-knit long sleeve that buttoned like it could be a cardigan, and some fun chunky boots that added some height to her normal stature. She had contemplated between this and possibly twenty other tops and a few other bottoms. Landing on this felt right, plus it didn’t clash with Harry, the color of her shoes actually matched the color of the snake on the cardigan.

They both compliment each other on the way out to his car and she giggles when he stops and twirls her around. He says he didn’t get a “proper look” before for him to compliment her adequately. After the twirl, he nods and starts them off again, complimenting the specific pieces of her clothes and says she looks beautiful again. His giddiness was contagious.

“No Range tonight,” she muses when Harry stops them in front of a Mercedes-Benz cream convertible, top up.

“Not working,” he replies, unlocking the car with the key into the passenger’s side door handle.

She smiles and slides into the car and watches him jog around to his side and unlock it as well.

“Tonight is going to be fantastic,” he says, leaning over the console and kissing her cheek, just beside her lips.

And when he pulls away with that smug smile of his, she knows he kissed her there on purpose. But the little tease only makes her smile more. He was good at this. And he was right.

The night was fantastic. As was every night after. And she learned that Harry was so much more than anything she ever thought. She counted herself lucky to be loved by a man like him.

[snelbz]

Life As We Know It {Chapter 23}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays. Occasional surprise chapters could be posted at miscellaneous times. Chapters will be posted on both my and Tara’s blogs! >> @tacmc.​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

Nesta was torn.

Half of her thought that Cassian was overreacting, but the other half of her thought that his anger and frustration was perfectly justified.

What exactly were they getting into? And, was it what was best for Nyx? Yeah, the last month had been great, but if it didn’t work out, what would that mean for him? Would it be better if she and Cassian had simply remained two friends, co-parenting under one roof?

Nesta’s heart began to beat a little faster.

She felt like she was going into a panic attack.

Cassian and Nyx had been gone for an hour, and every second that passed became more and more unbearable.

She needed him to be there.

She needed to figure this out.

She just didn’t know what the answer was.

Alis had gotten into her head, there was no doubt about that. A little over an hour ago, she was living in a dream, then Alis came in, out of nowhere, and brought her back to reality.

She was sitting on the couch, almost exactly where he’d left her, when he finally returned. He was covered in sweat, his t-shirt sticking to him. Nyx was having a conversation with him, more to himself though, since it didn’t seem like Cassian was even close to paying attention to him. But his eyes went directly to Nesta as soon as he walked in.

She’d changed. She no longer wore his t-shirt, instead in a loose shirt of her own and a pair of jeans, and her hair was loose and wet around her face. As if she’d need to shower their night together, shower him off of her. Not a shred of that beautiful skin was showing, not like she’d been doing lately. Leggings and shorts and tank tops. She’d been comfortable around him.

With a scoff, Cassian set Nyx down on the floor. He headed for the stairs, but Nesta stood, nearly toppling the cup of coffee she’d been clutching over as she set it on the coffee table. “Cassian, we need to talk about this.”

He paused, waving a hand towards her. “What for? It looks like you’ve already made your decision.”

“I need you to calm down,” she said, steadily. “I need you to think logically.”

Cassian closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I need you to tell me.”

Nesta hesitated. “Tell you what?”

“If this is something you want to pursue or if I just wasted the last couple months falling in love with you,” he finished.

His voice may have lacked emotion, but Nesta felt every word like a stab in the chest. Falling in love with you. Those were the words she was going to tell him today, under much different circumstances.

Now, she didn’t know what to think.

Now, she was overwhelmed.

Now, all of her thoughts were rushing toward the same spot in the middle of her skull at a thousand miles an hour, and when they got there, her head would explode.

“It’s not that easy,” she said, and her voice cracked.

“But it should be,” Cassian said. “If you feel the way that I do, it should be that easy.”

“We have to think of Nyx,” she breathed.

“I am thinking of Nyx,” he said, struggling to keep his voice low. At the sound of his name, the baby turned to look at him. “I want him to grow up in a happy home, seeing two people who love each other, and damn it if that isn’t how it’s been for the past few weeks.”

“It’s not that simple,” Nesta said, shaking her head. “What happens if we break up? What happens if we get in a fight or something happens to one of us? What then?”

He had strode down the stairs and was in front of her before he could stop himself. He framed her face in his hands, like he had so many times the past month, to kiss her, to make love to her, to show her how he cared for her. “Why are you worrying about the what if’s? Why are you worrying about what could go wrong, rather than how right everything has been?”

Because everything goes wrong eventually. The only reason we’re together is because we were shoved into this house after the worst thing imaginable happened. They died. We took over. What right do we have to be happy?

The words flooded her mind, but stilled on her tongue.

Nesta didn’t push him away. She wanted to reach up on her toes and kiss him, softly, but she didn’t.

Instead, she met his gaze. “Cass,” she breathed.

The pain in his eyes nearly shattered her heart into a million pieces.

Nyx had walked up to them and was hugging Nesta’s leg, as if he knew that she needed the comfort.

“Dont say my name like that,” he whispered.

Nesta slowly shook her head. “I just think this has all happened too quickly. We haven’t been thinking, we’ve just been acting-.”

“You’re pushing me away,” Cassian interrupted, swallowing harshly. “Damn it, Nesta.”

“You don’t understand,” she pleaded.

“Because you’re not making sense,” he argued. “Things have been perfect—”

“They’re dead!” She cried, pulling from his grip, scooping Nyx up. “Things have been far from perfect. We’re only like this now because Rhys and Feyre are dead.”

The words seemed to freeze something inside of Cassian and he stepped back as well. “So what? We go back to how we used to be? I’m back in the guest room and we awkwardly exchange good mornings over breakfast?”

She closed her eyes, trying to block out the sight of him, the scent of him, everything. “I don’t know, Cassian, I don’t—.” She took a shuddering breath, her arms wrapping tighter around Nyx. “I just need some time to think, to breathe…”

When she looked back up at him, his jaw was set and he was slowly nodding. “Fine. Take your time.”

And then he was moving, back up the stairs before Nesta could even ask what he was doing.

A few minutes later, he was back with a duffle bag in his hands.

“Wh—what are you doing?”

“Giving you space,” he said, refusing to meet her gaze.

Nesta opened her mouth but nothing came out. She was frozen where she stood, her feet stuck to the floor, her mouth hanging open, that panic rising from the pit of her stomach into her heart, which was beating far too quickly.

Cassian kissed Nyx on the forehead as he passed, but paid Nesta no mind as he went for the door.

“Cassian!” She called, at last.

Cassian stopped just in front of the door, keeping his back to her, one hand on the doorknob.

“You're just going to leave?” She asked, quietly, bouncing a sleepy Nyx on her hip. “Just like that?”

Cassian didn’t turn around. “Are you going to ask me to stay?”

Yes. No. I don’t know. Nesta said nothing.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” he grumbled, exhaustion lacing his tone. “Maybe I need time to think, too.”

He opened the door and shut it softly behind him.

*

He didn’t know where else to go. He didn’t have anywhere else to go.

He knew where he wanted to be, but right now…

He couldn’t look at her.

It didn’t escape him that when he’d told her he’d fallen in love with her, she didn’t say it back. He couldn’t even act like he hadn’t seen her eyes flare in panic. So he couldn’t stay there. Couldn’t go back to sleeping in that guest room, not when he’d become so used to sleeping with her in his arms every night.

So Cassian had ended up here, knocking on his brother’s door, thankful that his car had been parked in the driveway when he pulled up.

He needed a drink. He needed someone to tell him he was being an asshole. He needed someone to listen while he vented and bitched. He knew Azriel would do all that for him.

When he answered the door, Seph was in his arms, pulling on his bottom lip. She smiled when she saw Cassian, but Azriel’s surprised smile quickly faded.

“Do I want to know?” He asked, looking at the duffel bag tossed over Cassian’s shoulder.

Cassian sighed, raking a hand through his hair. “Can I sleep here tonight?”

Azriel stared at him for a second before stepping aside and letting Cassian pass.

“Are we talking about this now or later?” Azriel asked, shutting the door behind them.

“Beer?” Cassian asked, dropping his bag beside the couch.

“Fridge,” Azriel said, slowly, watching him.

Cassian made his way to the kitchen and threw open the refrigerator door, grabbing a cold bottle and chugging its contents.

Azriel followed, leaning against the countertop and Seph continued to play with his lips.

“Where’s Elain?” Cassian asked, tossing the empty bottle into the trash and getting another.

“Work,” Azriel said, sighing. “So, if this involves smack talking Nesta, you may want to get it out now.”

He shook his head. He didn’t want to do that, barely wanted to think about her. But he owed Azriel at least some explanation.

“The social worker stopped by this morning,” he sighed, leaning back against the counter and opening the beer. “And honestly, yeah, it was unexpected, but I figured it’d be fine. Last time, Nes was drunk off her ass, but we— I figured, since we were more of a family this time, things would be great.”

Azriel blinked. “They’re not taking Nyx, are they?”

Another shake of his head. “No, gods, no. They— She could tell he was in good hands, but she immediately picked up on Nesta and I. What we’ve…become.”

It seemed, just like Cassian, Azriel didn’t see it as a problem. He wasn’t following. “And?”

“And Nyx was hungry so I left the social worker and Nesta alone to get him breakfast. I came back and she’s gone and Nesta is second-guessing our relationship. She asked if I’m just fucking her out of convenience.”

The thought made him sick to his stomach, almost as badly as it hurt his heart.

“And you replied with…” Azriel began, trailing off, waiting for Cassian to finish the sentence.

“I went for a jog,” Cassian said, shrugging.

“So you ran away?” Azriel pushed.

Cassian shot him a look. “No. I went for a jog.”

Azriel sighed. “And when you came back?”

“She said she needed space,” Cassian said, emptying his bottle.

Azriel set Seph on the floor with a plastic spatula, which she instantly start banging on the cabinets. “And that’s when you ran away?”

“I didn’t run,” Cassian snapped. “I gave her what she wanted. I gave her space.”

Azriel slowly shook his head. “Did you even try to talk things out?”

“Yes,” Cassian said, the word clipped. “Told her I was falling in love with her, and guess how she replied?”

Azriel watched his brother.

“Didn’t say a fucking word,” Cassian finished.

When Azriel didn’t speak, he walked back to the trash can, dropping the bottle inside.

“Quit looking at me like I’m the bad guy here,” he said, unable to turn around and look his brother in the eye. “She was ending it. She was calling things off and I’m supposed to, what? Just keep living there like we were before? Pretend nothing has changed?” He swallowed hard, willing the damn tears clouding his vision to fade. They wouldn’t. “She didn’t even ask me to stay.”

Azriel sighed, opening a cabinet beside the fridge that Seph couldn’t reach. He produced a bottle of whiskey and set it on the counter. “I can’t drink until Elain gets home. And I absolutely think you need to talk to Nesta, but I think you’re right. You need to stay here tonight. Give her space.”

Cassian blinked, and a tear that was holding on slid free, down his cheek. He angrily wiped it away. He felt ridiculous, but it had been a long time since he had told a woman that he loved her. He’d never said it in his adulthood. A couple times in his teens, before he knew what the word really meant, but never as an adult.

He’d said it.

He’d meant it.

And she hadn’t felt the same.

Cassian nodded and poured himself a glass of whiskey.

*

Nesta stared at Cassian’s contact on her phone screen.

She wanted to press the call button, but didn’t.

She did open a blank text a few times, but couldn’t type anything.

She didn’t know what to think, didn’t know what to do.

She knew what she wanted.

She wanted Cassian.

But, she didn’t know if that was a good thing or not.

She had never been one who was dependent on a man, had spent most of her twenties single and having no problem with it. But suddenly, she couldn’t imagine her day to day life without Cassian in it. And that terrified her.

She heard murmuring on the baby monitor sitting next to her on the side table and glanced over to see Nyx sitting up in his crib.

It had been nearly three hours since Cassian left, and aside from putting Nyx down for a nap, Nesta had barely moved. She still sat in the same spot on the couch she’d been in when the social worker had shown up and when she’d ignored that Cassian had said that he loved her.

The words should have filled her with joy and she should have screamed from the rooftops that she loved him, too. Instead she locked up and thought she was going to be sick.

What was wrong with her?

Wiping away the tears she didn’t even realize had fallen, Nesta hurried up the stairs, and into Nyx’s nursery. He reached for her the moment he saw her, his own big, blue eyes beginning to fill with tears.

“What’s wrong, bubba?” She cooed, resting his head against her shoulder.

After a deep sigh, he looked up at her and reached for a tear that had fallen down her cheek. His lip began to wobble.

“I’m okay,” Nesta promised, even though her voice cracked and those tears continued. “I’m okay, buddy, I promise.”

Nyx knew, though.

He knew something wasn’t right.

He knew Cassian was gone.

He knew Nesta was heartbroken.

Little did he know that her heartbreak was self-inflicted.

Nyx laid his head back on her shoulder and clung to her. He stayed like that as she walked back downstairs and sat back in her spot on the couch.

He held onto her, looking around the room. She knew he was looking for him and was about to tell him he wasn’t here when he spoke. The word wasn’t a mash up of noises like it had always been. No, it was a true and steady word. His first word.

“Dada?”

Nesta froze. She didn’t even know what to say. Should she tell him Cassian wasn’t his father? He probably wouldn’t even understand, just like he didn’t understand where Rhys and Feyre had gone.

But…for all intents and purposes, Cassian was his daddy now. And she was his mama.

So she pressed a kiss to his dark hair and whispered. “He had to leave, baby. He had to go for a little while.”

Nesta hoped and prayed that Cassian would walk back through that door, and yet, she couldn’t muster the courage to ask him to.

That night, instead of Cassian taking up the spot next to her, it was Nyx, who held her hand until they both fell asleep.

[mitchmarniesgf]

wearing the boys of Shiratorizawa’s uniform shirts to school + a jacket :)

(NO BUT SERIOUSLY THIS HAS GOT TO BE ONE OF MY FAVORITE HEAD CANNONS IVE EVER EVEN THOUGHT OF) 

kissing obvi, fluff, slight swearing ig 

contains: Ushijima, Semi, Tendō, and Goshiki,

y'all are dating them btw (minus Goshiki)

(YES I KNOW THEY WHERE UNIFORMS BUT IN THIS UNIVERSE THEY DONT OKAY BECAUSE THIS STORY WOULD NEVER WORK)

(also, sorry Ushijima’s was so much longer. I love writing head cannons for him, same with Goshiki)

                                              Wakatoshi Ushijima 

While getting ready in the morning, you glanced into your boyfriends closet. Hanging up facing the front was his uniform shirt and shorts, ready for his match tomorrow morning. Buttt you two still had school today. You grabbed the shirt and threw it on for fun, it instantly fell to your knees. You weren't necessarily short, but you weren't tall compared to Ushijima. Chilling at a nice height of 5′4. Okay maybe that was short but you were taller than most of your friends. Anyways Ushijima being almost 6′3 made his shirt be HUGE on you. You paired it with a pair of black leggings and tucked it into your pants. Considering it was a volleyball uniform it was surprisingly comfy. You grabbed your bag and ran out to the lobby of your dorms. Ushijima had a volleyball meeting, and you're glad because you wouldn't have been able to wear his shirt. Taking the bus to school was your least favorite thing when Ushijima wasn't with you. But today, today everyone was staring at you. At school, all you heard was whispering, clearly about you and why you were wearing that. You eventually reached your class. You rushed in with a huge smile across your face. Teeth and all. “Ushi!!” You yelled. He was talking with a group of his volleyball mates. You hugged him from behind and he turned slowly. “Hm,” He hummed. “You look good in number one..” He said in his normal monotone voice, hugging you. “Just don't spill on it,” he whispered in your ear. “I have to wear this tomorrow.” His teammates cackled. “Ushijima being affectionate?” Semi said, crossing his arms. Ushijima picked you up like a toddler and you wrapped your legs around his waist as he sat in his chair before the bell rang. You buried your face into the crook of his neck. Taking in his scent. “I love you..” you said with a muffled voice. he chuckled. “I love you too.” 

                                                    Eita Semi

Dating Semi was wonderful. He always let you wear his hoodies, jackets, but he never ever will let you wear his uniform. He says “Honestly y/n, your way to clumsy. Thats my uniform!” You know he didn't mean It to be rude, but today you wanted to be a little rebellious. You paired his uniform shirt with black leggings and headed off to school. You had spotted Semi from a mile away. One of his best friends pointed at you, and you saw his head turned slowly. His eyes wide as you skipped down the hall wearing his number 3. He rushed towards you. “What the hell are you-” He stopped. “y’know, why have I never let you wear this before?” you giggled. “You always said I was to clumsy..” you said, twirling your hair. Semi lifted your chin and kissed your lips before heading off to class. “Carful clumsy! I need that tomorrow!” he shouted, running off. “Love you!” you yelled back.

                                                 Satori Tendō

Satori had a huge match tomorrow, and you wanted to cheer him on. Not just at your dorm, at school too.  You grabbed his team jacket, but you wanted to do more. You grabbed his uniform shirt knowing he won't care. You paired it with a pair of black leggings and headed out the door to school. Once you got there, you looked everywhere for Satori. Nothing. All of a sudden you were swept up from your feet, and you were being carried to your class like a bride by none other than your loving boyfriend. “How come you've never worn the number #5 before?” He said smirking. “It looks good on you.” He set you down so very gently. You giggled as he hugged you once more and slid off his jacket you were wearing, also kissing you on the cheek in the process. “Sorry-” you started saying, but he stopped you. “I just want more people to see that your mine.” He whispered. Blushing, you stood there stuttering as he walked to his class. “Love ya baby.” He said winking back to you, giving his famous peace sign. “L-Love you too..” you said. The butterflies in your stomach flying.

                                               Tsutomu Goshiki

You and Goshiki weren't really in a “relationship” yet but you both liked each other. You were both first years and still trying to figure out the layout of the school. But you knew he had a big match tomorrow, and wanted to cheer him on. So you headed to his dorm room. You knocked and waited for somebody to answer. His roommate, Kenjirō Shirabu, a second year on the team answered. He stared at you in disbelief. “Oh, its that girl who always comes to our matches.” you smiled. “Yeah, im y/n. Did Goshiki leave yet?” he shook your hand. “Yeah he just left a few minutes ago, sorry bout that. Did you need anything?” you smirked. “Yeah, his volley ball uniform shirt. Or his jacket..” Shirabu snorted. “Are you his girlfriend or whatever?” You blushed, flustered you try to speak. “No! No! I-Im just a g-good friend! Yeah, a good friend.” Shirabu laughed and walked back behind the door. “Here ya go kid.” He threw the shirt at you. You ran to a bathroom and changed. While walking into school, you noticed a few of Goshiki’s friends staring and laughing at you. Once you spotted him, you slowly walked behind him. “H-Hey..Goshiki? I just wanted to say good luck tomorrow..” He turned around, obviously recognizing your voice. “y/n. Thanks-” His eyes widened. You threw your face into your hands all flustered like. “s-sorry..ill go change if you want.” You said, your voice muffled. He just stood there. “No, it actually looks good on you.” He said, confidently. What? He never showed affection to anybody. “I uh- t-thanks!” He smirked, grabbing your hand he said “Are you going tomorrow?” you nodded yes. “Good,” he said dropping you off at your class. “If anybody asks, your Goshiki's  girlfriend.” he walked away, a smile growing on his face. “uh..what the-” you blushed. Just know that Shirabu gave Goshiki so much crap after that. 

YASSS!! This one was so fun to write! Remember all of my stories that are x y/n will be for !Fem readers. unless a special request is made. Also this is not proofread, just saying. This took me SOOO long. almost a whole day and I got threw two playlists that had 40 songs each. Feel free to drop request in the notes!  Next school: Karasuno

[make-me-imagine]

Daffodils: New Beginnings

Valentines Special: Day Eight

Day One: Morning Glories  //  Day Two: Blue Salvias Day Three: Sunflowers  //  Day Four: Pink Camellias Day Five: Yellow Tulips   //  Day Six: Violets Day Seven: Lisianthus - Day Nine: Red Roses (link to post with all endings listed)

Plot: The reader keeps receiving flowers and sweet messages every day from an anonymous source leading up to Valentines Day. But who is sending them?

Choose your own character ending (coming on Valentines Day).

Gender!Neutral Reader x ???

Triggers: Brief mention of fighting        Words: 1,569

Marvel Taglist: @aquariuslavenderhoney​​​, @thebookbakery​​​, @groovyfluxie​​ Requested Taglist: @spuffyfan394​​​, @gaitwae​​​, @fablesrose​​​, @kitkatd7​​​, @thefallenbibliophilequote​​​, @beksib​​​, @destynelseclipsa​​​, @criminaly-supernatural​​​, @tammythompson-singslikea-muppet, @belloangelus​​​, @snarky--starky​​​, @saintbootlegloras​​​, @wecallhimbrowneyess​​​, @empath-bunny​​​, @okkulta​​​, @katinthemoon,  @ravennight41​​​, @youcancallme-rae , @radhumandragonclam, @unfortunateidiotinadilemma, @past3l-w1ngs​​​  , @anonymous-pls-dont-click​​​ , @username23345​​​, @hulkswitch​​​, @theofficialzivadavid​​​, @lainphotography​​​, @fred-deeks-ben​​​, @normanijauregui​​​, @goinggoinggonzo​​, @mxxnmocha​​, @euphouriaszn2​​, @trikruismybitch​, 

February 13th

"You sure you’re alright?” Wanda asked as she watched your rub your shoulder. 

“I’m good, just a little sore.” you said reassuringly. 

You had been called out on a mission with Steve, Wanda, and Natasha to check out a possible hit on a SHIELD office. You managed to catch the assault team before they made it into the building, but a fight broke out. When you were fighting one of the men, he pulled you down a short flight of stairs, you banged your shoulder pretty bad, but it seemed to be alright now. 

You were riding back to the tower now, sitting in the back seat with Wanda.

“You should get your shoulder checked out when we get back, just in case.” Steve said, looking at your through the drivers mirror. 

“Is that an order Captain?” you asked with sarcasm as you leaned forward, talking to Steve over the seat. 

You could see him smirk at your question as he peaked back at you “If it has to be, then yes.” 

You smiled in amusement as you sat back in your seat “Yes sir” you said, saluting, making Wanda chuckle and Natasha and Steve smirk at your response. 

Doing just as he said, you had your shoulder scanned in the medical wing once you returned. But finding no real damage you went back to work. Entering into the large main room, you staggered back as a man carrying a large box passed by you when you came through the doors. Looking around you saw a bunch of people walking around. It took you a moment before you remembered that they were the people hired to set up the Valentines party.

This room was going to be the main room for the party, tables set up for the dinner and a stage in the front for the entertainment. Seeing through the large doors to your left, you figured that would be where the dancing would take place. 

Looking around, you could tell the color scheme was going to be gold and red, classy, but a bit gaudy in some areas. You saw Tony walk through nearby doors, explaining something to one of the decorators, turning, he spotted you. Leaving the decorator with a last instruction he walked over to you. 

“So, what do you think so far?” he asked as he stood next to you, motioning to the room. 

“No chocolate fountain?” you asked with sarcasm. 

You saw his eyes light up as he snapped his finger “A chocolate fountain!” Turning to one of the nearby people, he got their attention “Any chance of getting a chocolate fountain?” 

You rolled your eyes “Tony, that’s too much!”

“No no, it’s a good idea” he said to you before looking back to the other person who began writing something down “And get some skewers, fruit and marshmallows, it can be like a giant fondue station.” 

“That doesn’t sound very sanitary” you said with a frown.

He hesitated for a moment “No, it’ll be fine, we’ll put up a sign, no double dipping” You shook your head with a laugh as he turned fully towards you “So, how’d your little mission go?”

“Fine, we stopped the assault, arrested all of the members, Nat and Clint will be questioning them.” 

Tony opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted as someone called him from across the room “Go ahead, I’ve got to get back to work anyway” you said as you parted ways. Leaving the room you felt anxious again thinking about the party and what would happen. Trying to shake away the anxiety, you got back to work. 

- - -

You managed to distract yourself by working the rest of the day, and now you were sitting at the kitchen bar in the public part of the tower. Public meaning it could be accessed by all of the Avengers. 

“Hey” Wanda greeted as she wandered in “What are you doing in here?” 

You smiled at her and lifted your hand in greeting “Just finished work, I’m waiting for the rest of the party planners and decorators to leave for the day, they are constantly using the elevators and stairs, filling them with people and stuff.” you chuckled. 

She sat down next to you “Yeah, I couldn’t even get to the elevator in the first place” she chuckled “How’s your shoulder?”

“It’s good, no pain anymore.” you responded “So, are you looking forward to Tony’s party?” you asked her. 

She shrugged “Not particularly. I’m not one for crowded parties.”

“Me neither, but Tony will never get over it if I don’t show up, you too probably.”

“Oh yes I know, he told me so himself” you both chuckled. 

"Tony and his parties.” you commented just as the doors opened. Clint, Steve and Natasha walking in. 

“Ah, there you two are. “ Clint said as they made there way over to you. Clint and Steve sat at the bar with you and Wanda as Nat moved behind the bar. 

You sat and talked with the others for a while, about today’s planned attack, about who they were hired by, and then about Tony’s party. You started to feel the now familiar anxiety rise in your chest. Making yourself yawn, you feigned drowsiness before rising “Alright, I need to get some sleep.” you said, knowing that, though you were tired, you might not be able to sleep anyways. 

“Goodnight” Wanda, Nat and Steve said as you began to leave.

“Hey” Clint said.

Turning back to him you rose your brow. “Did you get any flowers from your secret admirer today?” he asked with a smirk.

“Ooh, yeah I almost forgot about that” she smirked as she looked at you. Wanda and Steve turned to look at your as well. 

“Uhh, no, but I haven’t been back to my room since lunch, soo”

“Soo, maybe there will be something now?” Nat said with a smile. 

Saying nothing you just smiled, cocked your head and then spun around, leaving in silence. Hearing chuckling from the others behind you as you left. You had actually successfully been distracted to the point where you forgot about the flowers. 

Luckily all of the decorators and planners had been long gone, so you could make your way to your room easily. As you stopped at your floor, you braced yourself for what would be on the other side, feeling a sense of familiar excitement. 

As the doors slid open, your eyes were already trained on your door. And placed at the bottom, was a tall bouquet of pale yellow daffodils tied together with white silky ribbon, a note dangling from the side. 

Quickly making your way to your door, you unlocked it before picking up the bouquet and going inside. This was the last bouquet you would get before learning who was behind all of this tomorrow. Your heart seemed to be hammering in your chest as you stared at the note.

You were almost afraid to read it. You hesitated before setting it down and going to the bathroom. Getting ready for bed, you grabbed the flowers and put them into a vase, a new one you bought at the store. Sitting on your bed, you fiddled with the note in your hand. Slowly opening it, you psyched yourself up a bit before you began to read the note. 

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ Daffodils

Daffodils mean “New Beginnings”. I chose these because tomorrow will be the start of a new beginning for the two of us. No matter what happens. I, of course have my own wishes of how tomorrow will go, and I am sure you do as well. Perhaps you have your own desires of who I am, and I hope that I do not disappoint you when you find out who I am.

I have so much more I want to write, but cannot seem to put it properly into words. I’m sure we are both nervous about tomorrow, but I do truly feel as though we are meant to be. And though I cannot see the future, I know tomorrow will be the start of something new, and I can only hope that it will be great. ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

Reading over the note a few times you lied back on your bed as you stared up at the ceiling. You had stopped trying to figure out who it could be. Knowing that they were careful enough not to let anything seem obvious. And if you had been talking to them one on one, or when everyone would be talking about the flowers, they were careful enough not to say anything that would make them seem suspicious. 

For a moment, you debated not going to the party at all. And chickening out instead. But you only entertained the thought for a moment before you felt guilt for even thinking it. They did not deserve that. No matter how afraid you might be about what might happen tomorrow, they didn’t deserve to be stood up, especially not after everything they have said and done. But then again, what if they stand you up? What if they change their mind, and you never find out who they are?

You closed your eyes, your thoughts running rapid through every possibility of what could happen tomorrow. Eventually, without really realizing it, you had drifted off to sleep.

xx xx xx xx xx

Sooo, tomorrow is the day!

I will be releasing every ending throughout Valentines Day (10 in total); starting around 5am MST. Let me know if you want to be tagged in any specific endings.

The endings will be: Bucky, Steve, Tony, Bruce, Thor, Loki, Clint, Natasha, Vision and Wanda. 

[greyeyedmonster-18]

Free for All Friday

"What--"

"I dont want to talk about it. I don’t want to talk about anything."

"Can I ask two questions?"

"Moony..." Sirius stretched out the other boys name, tilting his head back from where he was laying on the concrete ledge to look at him.

"They're yes or no questions."

"Fine."

"Did Mulciber really grab Lilys arse?"

"No."

"Is you slamming his face into a wall related to the conversation you had with your brother today?"

“...How...did you…?”

Remus coughed a little, clearing his throat from smoke, “Porter told me. We have Runes together and...he found me after and mentioned it because he..was concerned...said you felt a little off? Thought I might have some insight or...just wanted to make sure you were okay. Does… it have anything to do with why you realtered Mulcibers face?”

"Yes."

"Alright," Remus nodded, putting his joint in his mouth, the two of them inhaling and exhaling smoke for the next several moments. Sirius closed his eyes, not wanting to look at the stars or the lights from the castle. Just wanted to feel the dust in his lungs and the rough concrete on the back of his head. Smell the traces of marijuana from Remus and the softer hints of the other boys soap--linen mixing with tobacco.

"Tell me something good, Moony," Sirius said, his voice raspy from smoke.

“Like what?”

“I dunno...something good. Today was shitty, this week has been mostly shitty...so was last week, really. I just need something good.”

"Mmm...I tripped during Muggle Studies and successfully knocked over a diorama that was set up." Sirius snorted, "I tried to be a good person and pick it up, but ended up bending down at the exact same moment as, Victoria Adams from Ravenclaw? My bag swung around and hit her in the head." Sirius laughed a little more, "Is that what you had in mind?"

"That works," Sirius smiled softly, opening his eyes again to see Remus looking down at him. "Got anything else?"

"I do."

"I'd like to hear them...only good things"

Remus reached down to brush a stray curl off of Sirius' forehead. Fingertips barely touching skin, "Well...did I tell you the hospital wing incident?" Sirius shook his head and Remus grinned, continuing to fill the silence of the night with stories of his misfortunes and things he had witnessed. Happenstances when he was out on prefect rounds, letters from his mother...Remus kept talking and Sirius kept smoking, the noise in his own head quieting with every word from Remus's mouth. Remus didn't make a comment on Sirius' third and final cigarette. He didn't suggest they move or go back to the dorm. He just talked.

He just kept casually touching Sirius' hair, his fingers running through his scalp. And Sirius didn't want to move, even after he crushed the butt of the cigarette against the concrete ledge. It was so nice there with Remus.

No upset boyfriends.

No scolding professors or disappointed best friends.

No brother glaring from across the hall or a lingering, mandatory apology expected to be given to the boy with bruises under his eyes and bandages on his face in the hospital wing.

But Sirius finally sat up, jumping down from the ledge, standing on the ground in front of Remus, "We should go in before your arse freezes to the concrete..." he said lightly, shoving his hands into the pockets of his coat.

"Not just yet," Remus said and Sirius raised an eyebrow at the other boy. Remus’ hand that hadn’t been stroking bits of Sirius’ hair had been in his coat pocket for ages, his shoulders drawn up and in to preserve warmth.

“If you have a death wish, I’m happy to shove you into a wall…”

“That’s not funny.”

“Neither is you becoming an ice sculpture, let’s --”

"Tell me something good."

"I have nothing good. Ask again tomorrow."

"One good thing from today," Remus said looking at him intently. "One thing. There has to be something.”

“Why?”

“I’m...all for leaning into the shit-storm that is life occasionally...but there has to be something good, or else...you don’t get out of bed in the morning.” Remus shrugged, “The sun also rises sort of thing.”

“...Hemingway?” Remus’ eyebrows rose in complete surprise, “What?I read.” “He’s a muggle.”

“He’s half-decent.”

“Then...what’s your good thing?”

Sirius sighed, reaching up to tie his hair back into a knot, "Well...I was too stubborn to go to the hospital wing even though during Potions my hand started hurting, so I wrote with my left hand all day which means my notes are driving me fucking insane which means I’m going to spend tomorrow re-doing them, I had to tell Porter that I have detention for the rest of the week and into the weekend, and he proceeded to tell me that he didn’t know if he could be with someone who got into fights. And then after that, I had the pleasure of getting my arse handed to me by McGonagall, who by the way, didn’t believe a word of the excuse Lily gave, who instead of writing lines or manual labor, made me sit there for an hour while she lectured me on exactly how disappointing this was after the start of this year was so promising.”

This was half-brained and foolish. Where did you put your head? Where is the boy who has been getting points for his house instead of getting them taken away?

You’re better than this, Mr. Black.

“So after all that shit...I came outside to smoke with you on our ledge and...you made me laugh and forget just for an hour that I have a bad temper like my mother and I really wish I didn’t. Because when McGonagall was asking me why over and over again, that’s all I could think of. That I am...genetically pre-disposed to react and...make bad choices.” Sirius told him, “You and your two left feet are the only good thing about today.”

[loousir]

Soulmates {Oikawa Tooru}

Oikawa Tooru x Male Reader Part One

Anime: Haikyuu!!

Warnings: I dont think there is any?

Masterlist | Part Two

AU: Soulmates can have a different way of finding their partner. Yours is after both partners are at least 18, on the youngers birthday, they will swap bodies. They have to share their first of something together in order to return to their respective body. (Ex. Sharing their first kiss, first drink etc.)(If one has already kissed or shared a drink, for example, it wont count as sharing a first) Oikawa's is knowing what their first words to you are.

Originally Posted on February 2, 2021

----------------------------------------------------------

Today was finally your birthday. That meant that you would get to find out who your soulmate was. You were nervous but knew about it so you were prepared. A little.

You were getting dressed to go to school today and thankfully it was the end of the week so you'd have all weekend to find your soulmate. What nice and convenient timing. You did your morning routine before getting changed into your uniform. After pulling up you striped brown pants and adjusting your white jacket, you slipped the red tie around your neck before grabbing your things and heading downstairs.

You said a quick goodbye to your mom after stealing a toaster waffle and your lunch. You slipped on your shoes and headed out to school.

On the way there, you ran into Iwaizumi and Oikawa. You were very good acquaintances but not close enough to consider friends, like hanging at each others houses kind of friends. You and Iwaizumi shared class together but the three of you almost always walked to school together.

"Happy birthday (Y/n)-kun! You're finally 18 right?" Oikawa asked, slinging his arm around your shoulder and leaning on your slightly smaller frame. He poked your cheek gently as you ate, trying to get a reply out of you. "Shittykawa, cant you see he's eating something? Let him chew first." Oikawa pouted slightly at his "nickname" and sighed.

You finished chewing and nodded. "Yeah, I'm 18 today. I'll find out who my soulmate is tomorrow and I really hope it isn't you." You said in a serious tone as the three of you continued walking to Aoba Johsai. Oikawa whined on the way there with Iwaizumi butting in to shut him up.

The trio finally made it to school and went their separate ways, aka you and Iwaizumi in one and Oikawa right next door.

---

The day started and went on normally til lunch.

Iwaizumi and Oikawa usually go to their practice but today they invited you to eat with them. You accepted not exactly knowing why.

"So (Y/n)-kun~ Who do you think is your soulmate?" You shrugged as you ate your bento, glancing up at Oikawa. "You really wanna know?" You asked taking another bite. Oikawa nodded as he ate his own bento. Iwaizumi smirked over to you as he ate his lunch as well. "You should tell him (L/n)-san."

"I hope it turns out to be Kageyama."

Oikawa practically snorted out his drink and stared at you in shock. "You cant be serious?! Him?!" You laughed at the water running down his face and shook your head. You grabbed a napkin you had and wiped the pretty setters face. "Of course not."

Oikawa let out a sigh of relief. "I'd want Daichi to be my soulmate." You said in a dreamy tone as Oikawa choked on his rice. Iwaizumi had nothing today besides laughing at the scene in front of him. Oikawa leaned on his good knee over to you and gripped your shoulders. He shook you gently as he cried, saying something about 'anyone but the wingless crows.'

Iwaizumi pulled him off you after a minute and scolded him. You finished up your bento and checked your phone. There was 40 minutes of lunch left when you looked to the best friends. "So, what did you guys invite me to hang for?" Iwaizumi looked over to you and tilted his head slightly. "Are we not allowed to invite a friend to hang out?"

You leaned back on your hands and closed your eyes, letting your head fall backwards. "You are, it's just, weird. The Cap and vice Cap of the volleyball team invite a lowly art club member to hang out at lunch together. Sounds a bit odd doesnt it?"

Iwaizumi nodded and Oikawa didnt respond. You lifted your head up to see Oikawa a bit of a distance away, surrounded by a flock of girls. "Its your turn to pull him away. I'm gonna go check something." You sighed and stood up.

"Hey, shittykawa." Oikawa instantly turned around at the nickname and his fan girls became upset with you calling him that. "(Y/n)-kun~ You're taking after Iwaizumiii~" He said walking over to you. "And we were supposed to be hanging out." You said acting all coy. "You promised me we would this morning..." You whispered just loud enough for everyone to hear.

The girls were jealous and talking amongst themselves as Oikawa just looking at you, shocked. He had a deep blush covering his cheeks as you folded your hands together in front of you and looked to the ground with a pout. "(Y/n)-kun..." You looked up to him with puppy dog eyes. He suddenly wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a tight hug.

"(Y/N)-KUN! IM SO SORRY!" He said as if he actually forgot he promised you to hang out. You smiled and giggled, gently prying him off of you. You grabbed his hand and started to walk with him. "C'mon. Let's go back to our spot." You said as you watched the lady flock disperse. Oikawa followed along, apologizing for forgetting a promise he never made.

Once the two of you were alone you sighed and let go of his hand. "Oikawa." He shut up and looked up to you with teary eyes. "You didnt promise me we'd hang out. Its ok." You may be mean to Oikawa but theres something about him that you love. You just cant be mean to him all the time... Ok yes you can but sometimes you want to be nice to him.

Oikawa smiled and pulled you into a hug again. You cautiously hugged back and patted his back. The bell signaling lunch was over rang and the two of you pulled away. "I'll stop by the gym after school to say a quick goodbye." You said grabbing yours and Iwaizumis stuff. Oikawa nodded and grabbed his stuff as well. He had a big smile on his face for some reason but you just brushed it off.

The rest of the day passed by pretty quickly. You had told Iwaizumi about stopping for a quick bye and he said, "Just be prepared for Oikawa." You didnt exactly know what the meant because you always were but before you could ask he had left for practice.

Once you were ready, you head down to the gym and pulled open the door. The lights were off and you furrowed your brows. "I thought there was practice today..." You mumbled to yourself.

Suddenly the lights turned on to show they gym and the volleyball team to be all dressed in nice birthday attire. You only stared shocked at the scene in front of you as the all shouted, "Surprise!" Oikawa appeared in front of your vision with a wide grin on his face and a small gift in his hand.

You blinked a few times and looked up to his eyes before looking to Iwaizumi who was approaching the two of you. "Y-you guys... Did this for me?" You asked, still surprised by what happened. Iwaizumi shrugged and tilted his head to the side saying 'kinda.' "It was Oikawa's idea."

Oikawa smiled and grabbed one of your hands, putting the gift in it. Iwaizumi put a party hat on your head before walking over to a table full of sweets and a cake. "Can I talk to you outside for a second?" You asked Oikawa. He smiled and lead the two of you outside the gym and away from prying ears.

"What did you wanna talk to me about?" You held the gift in your hand and pulled him into a tight hug. He stood tense for a moment before hugging back. "What's this for?" Oikawa asked with a small laugh. You buried your head in his chest and started to tremble slightly. He demeanor changed when he felt his shirt get slightly wet. "H-hey, (Y/n)? Are you ok?"

You nodded and kept hugging him. He hugged back and gently stroked the back of your head. "No ones ever done something like this before. So it's kinda a lot." You said clearly, having calmed down from your previous state. Oikawa laughed and pulled the two of you away to look you in the eyes.

"Really? Well then I'll have to step it up next time!" You smiled up to him softly before sadly looking down to your shoes. "I'm nervous Kawa..." His smile fades away to a sigh. "Me too." You look up to him in confusion. "I... Really hope tomorrow, I'll wake up in your body, Tooru..." He looks to your eyes and he has tears in this.

Dont ruin this moment shittykawa

"Me too."

You look up to him and smile a little. "C'mon, let's go back inside and par-tay a little before it's too late!" Oikawa said with a smile as he dragged you back inside. You saw Iwaizumi standing by a punch bowl with a knowing smirk but you didnt think much of it.

---

Everyone had hung around and "par-tay"-ed till about 7pm. They decided to call it there and start cleaning up. You tried to help but both Oikawa and Iwaizumi stopped you. "Why dont you and Oikawa head back first? The least we can do is clean up."

"But you guys did all this for me, I have to try to help even a little." Iwaizumi put your things over your shoulder and pushed you to an already raring to go Oikawa. "Just head home. Its ok." Oikawa gently grabbed your hand but you stopped and addressed the whole team.

They had paused to look at you and listen. You bowed and thanked them, your bow hiding the tears in your eyes. You stood up straight and smiled to them before going with an impatient Oikawa.

---

The walk to your home was filled with comfortable conversation about the party. "Hey, (Y/n)-kun? Could we have a sleepover at your house?" You looked up to him and tilted your head slightly. "Like the whole team? That's a lot of people and I dont know if my parents would even let me since there away right now-"

"No, not the whole team. Just us." You blushed at what he said and looked away, slightly embarrassed for rambling. "Oh... J-just the two of us?" He nodded and you just shrugged. "I-I guess thats... Ok. I dont think they'll mind." You said rubbing the back of your neck. "Let's goo then!" Oikawa said, dragging you to your house.

Once you two arrived, you unlocked the door and let him in. "Your house is so much bigger on the inside." He said looking around. "Wow thanks." He laughed, "I didnt mean it in a bad way!" You rolled your eyes and walked upstairs to your room thinking, "How the fuck does this dude make me flustered so easily..."

You didnt even realize Oikawa had followed you, thinking he would just stay downstairs for the time being. When you turned around to close the door you jumped at his presence. "I-Im gonna change so you can just hang out downstairs till I'm done." He smiled and gently rubbed the back of his head before asking, "Do you think I could use your shower actually?"

"Oh, yeah, go for it. It's the door behind you." You said pointing over his shoulder. He thanked you as you got him a towel he could use. You closed the door to your room and got changed into some comfy pjs. The shower could be heard through your door but you didnt mind and decided to make yourself comfortable on your bed and watch some tv.

After a few minutes, the shower turned off and after another couple minutes, the door opening to reveal a shirtless Oikawa wearing sweatpants. You looked over only to look away just as fast. Oikawa smirked and jumped into the bed with you. You squeaked a very manly squeak as he hovered over you.

Your eyes looked up to his but couldn't be stopped when they looked at his chest. 'A tattoo?' You looked back up to him and asked, "You have a tattoo? Since when?" He just smiled and shook his head. "Since I was like twelve. Look what it says." He said sitting the two of you up. Oikawa was basically sitting on your lap but you didnt mind.

'You're in the way, stupid trashcan.'

It was written in beautiful cursive. You smiled and tried not to laugh but couldn't help it. Oikawa watched as the love of his life laughed at the first words he ever said to him.

"I said that when we first met! Did you really get it tattooed on your chest?" Oikawa rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Its illegal to get a tattoo when your twelve." You tilted your head slightly. "Then how did you get it?" He looked at you unamused before becoming nervous. This made you nervous too as he laid the both of you down in your bed.

"(Y/n)... Did you study soulmates?" You nodded and asked why. "Theres a chapter about two soulmates having different ways of finding eachother." You nodded again and tried to process the information but he spoke again. "Mine was the first words they say to you are tattooed somewhere on your body."

You looked at him and fully processed everything. It clicked. "Is that why you... Did all this stuff for me over the last year? W-why didn't you say something sooner?" He glanced out the window and seemed nervous again. "Theres a chance that you can actually have a different soulmate than me..." You furrowed your brows and sat up to look at him.

He didnt look at you and just glanced out the window. "What do you mean by that?" He looked over to you and directly in your eyes. "When we both have different ways of meeting our soulmate, theres a chance that you could have a different soulmate even though you're mine."

"That means when we wake up tomorrow... I wouldn't be hugging you, but your soulmate... And... I dont want that."

Oikawa looked away and you just looked at him shocked. "You're so weird out of character." You said leaning down and pulling him into a hug, laying on top of him in the process. "I'm being serious y'know..." You nod and nuzzle your face into his neck.

"I know. I dont want something like that to happen either." He shifted so that he could look at you properly and cupped your face. His eyes held clear care and adoration.

"Let's sleep now, and if I dont wake up to you tomorrow... I'll find you ok?"

--- 2552 Not proof read too well

[hwangsies]

LIMERENCE

(n) the state of becoming infatuated with another person

pairing: hyunjin x female reader

summary: you haven’t spoken a word to hyunjin since he ghosted you after a fun new years eve together, so what’s the worst that could happen when fate (or chaeryong,...well, same thing) pairs you up for a road trip across the country?

warnings: e2l (ish), university student!au, non idol!au ,a lot of swearing. alcohol consumption,long flashback, mentions of infidelity, hyunjin is a giggly sweetheart, smut as in: dom!hyunjin, unprotected sex (wrap it up luvs),fingering, oral (f recieving), slight choking, praise kink, hand & strenght kink (manhandleing oopsie), slight overstimulation, hyunjin is really enthusiastic about consent (as you should be, periodt), reader is nervous and scared of hyunjins big pickle (ew i hate myself), motel sex (but it’s not trashy i promise!)

8.6 k words ,meaning grab a snack and a drink,

and enjoy!<3

---

"alright everyone" your professor rubs his hands together "that was it for today... i hope you all have a great break and i'm very exited to see all of you again next semester. hopefully in person again" he chuckles.

You and your classmates exchange goodbyes with him before one after the other exits the zoom call.

"fuck" you sigh after closing your laptop and lean back on your bed.

"you did it girl" your dormmate chaeryong claps, at which you giggle before shifting your eyes to her on the other side of the room.

She's sitting on her bed, folding her clothes before putting it in her suitcase thats placed in front of her.

"finally" you sit up and watch her roll up a pair of socks.

"my last class was yesterday and mrs kim teared up" she giggles "it was kinda cute not gonna lie"

"oh god" you snicker.

"hey did you find someone to take to yongin?" you ask, remebering chearyong talking about wanting to find someone to share gas expenses with in exchange for a ride to her hometown.

"oh yea, i did" she turn to you "i think you know him, seo changbin?"

You furrow your brows in thought, you feel like you've heard of the name.

"he's a music major, one year above us, hes also from yongin" she continues folding a pair of jeans "funny you'd ask actually cause he told me one of his friends was looking for a ride to seoul, isn't that where you're going?"

"Yea i was thinking about finding someone honestly because gas is really fucking expensive if you aint rich" you say, placing your laptop onto your nightstand.

"Mm you aint gotta tell me girl" chaeryong mumbles, folding a sweatshirt.

"so who's that friend?" you ask, stretching out on your bed.

"he's in his grade, hyunjin"

Your neck almost cracks from how fats you whip your head “hwang hyunjin?”

"Oh yea" she points at you "you know him?"

"unfortunately" you huff.

"o-oh, what"s the tea?" your roommate wiggles her brows at which you shake your head.

"nothing much really" you sigh, leaning back again "he's just like the most arrogant and stuck up fuckboy ever"

"wow, well thats not nothing" chaeryong laughs "any reason as to why you think that?"

"you could probably ask any girl on campus and she'll tell you the same" you scoff.

"really girl?" chaeryong squints an eye at you playfully "cause i've only heard of him being hot but never of him being a hoe. And you know i'm the first to know the hot gossip" she winks.

Laughing defeatedly, running your hand through your hair.

"it's just- we hit it off at the campus' new years eve party, like really hit it off- at least thats what i thought"

"oooh spill it spill it" chaeryong leaps over to your bed to sit at the end of it.

"well there's really not much to spill, i gave him my number and he was talking all that smack about taking me out and stuff aaand to make a long story short i never heard from him again"

"well" chaeryong speaks slowly, biting her lip guiltily "i dont think you'll be very happy about me giving changbin your number for him, then?"

"you did what???" your eyes almost pop out of your head.

"sooorryy" she jumps up from your bed, clutching her hands apologetically "i didnt know"

"aaaaarghh" you whine, burying your face in your pillow.

"maybe he won't even text you though" chaeryong tries to console you, but the damage is already done...

-

unknown number - hey i got this number from changbin, i heard you're driving up to seoul, i'd love to tag along if you're looking for someone to share expenses with -recieved at 9:12 am

You huff looking at the message on your phone.

After chaeryong had left last night you really convinced yourself that he couldn't possibly dare to reach out to you.

But here you are reading his message after just waking up, and your day is already ruined.

you - who is this? - sent at 9:56 am

You know who it is, but you're not going to give him the satisfaction of thinking that you do.

Scoffing when he answers almost immediately.

unknown number - this is hyunjin, did i reach the right person? - recieved at 9:57 am

You have two choices at this point.

1. be petty and bitter about a boy who probably doesn't even remember you.

Or 2. move on and help someone who is also just trying to get home and also maybe get some closure.

So you curse your mother for rasing you so well and suck it up.

you - yea sure, i planned on leaving tomorrow at around 6 pm - sent at 10:02 am

Damn you and your common human decency.

he sus - oh okay great :) i only have one suitcase and a backpack btw so i wont take up alot of space or anything - recieved at 10:05 am

he sus - also i feel weird bc i dont know ur name or anything changbin literally just sent me the number and nothing else lol, also 6 sounds good should we meet at the main building then? -sent at 10:06 am

You're quite honestly not shocked that he seems nice over text because he was the same when you met on new years eve.

you - sure lets meet at the main building, my car is white and my name is y/n - sent at 10:09 am

Cringing as you press the send button because you are 99% certain he won't answer anymore; not that you'd care, obviously.

he sus - alright y/n see you tomorrow at 6 then :) - recieved at 10:14 am

You raise your brows when your phone lights up with his message, does he really not remember you?

Was he that drunk?

Well, it doesnt matter because you don't want to pay for all this gas alone and he seems to be the next best option to fix that.

So you shrug it off and get out off bed to run some last errands and start packing.

-

Your heart is beating unreasonably fast when you take a turn towards the main building at 5:55 pm the next day.

Calm down y/n it’ll just be 5 hours and who says you have to talk to him?

However you do know deep in your heart that you only wanted to arrive just a little early so you could complain about him being late.

That plan got cut short because your eyes fall on him as you pull up to the main building.

He’s- oh my god he’s blonde. You stop your car and he looks up at you.

“it is you!” hyunjin smiles at you when you step out of the car.

“who else would it be?” you ask, a little irritated at his reaction.

His face drops a bit when he sees you clearly annoyed by him, but the doesn’t blame you; he’d be mad too.

You open your trunk for him to put his weirdly small suitcase into, looking him up and down as he lifts it inside.

He’s wearing dark baggy pants and a windbreaker jacket, the top part of his chin-length blonde hair is pulled back into a messy ponytail.

He seemed to have bulked up as well, shoulders looking broader than what you remember.

The hair is different than the jet black hair that you remember on him, but it suits him very well; to be honest he would look good in any hair colour, not that you’d care though.

The first thirty minutes of the ride go by agonizingly slow and in complete silence.

When you drive onto the freeway you can’t take it anymore and mumble something among the lines of ‘wanna listen to some music?’.

You don’t wait for an answer, pressing the radio button right as you finish your sentence.

“uh, actually” hyunjin starts, his hand lifting to turn the radio back off, your eyes snap towards him, is he serious? Turning off your radio in your car?

“I wanted to address this situation” he says rather quietly.

You scoff “what? You realized that this is awkward just now?”

“no- I mean- yes I understand why you would think that but I just really want a chance to explain myself” he stutters.

“explain yourself” you repeat after him before mumbling “sure because there’s so much to explain”

“listen, I know you think I’m an asshole who just ghosted you b-“

“listen, I can handle rejection, you could’ve just said that you weren’t looking for something serious and I would’ve accepted that. The thing I’m mad about though is you literally making false promises and shit” 

Hyunjin blinks at you “can I please just explain to you what happened?”

You let out a long huff “sure” you wave your hand “go ahead”

“when you and your friends left at around 4, you wrote your number on my arm with your eyeliner, correct?” he asks.

Glancing over at him, you nod.

“after you where gone, I was already pretty drunk but then my friends decided to drag me with them to a different party that was still going” you see him fiddling with his hands in your peripheral “well I got super fucking shitfaced at that party and ended up puking on this one guys shoes”

You raise your eyebrows and hold back a laugh, which he notices.

“its okay you can laugh” he chuckles as well.

“anyways that guy was not very happy about it and busted my lip before kicking me and my friends out, so then back in the dorm my roommate sat me in the shower because I was full of alcohol, blood and puke”

“ew” you chime in.

“and when I woke up the next morning your number was gone” hyunjin looks over at you “we don’t have any mutual friends, I didn’t know what your major is so I couldn’t even asks for you in the administrating office, and then the covid lockdown happened and here we are”

“you called the administrating office?” you look over at him, he nods a little smile on his stupid pretty lips.

“yep, so, sorry to tell you but your eyeliner is not waterproof” he jokes at which you playfully knit your brows at him.

“believe me, I wanted to text you. I really wanted to take you out; and when you sent me your name yesterday I didn’t know if this was a lucky coincidence or if you’re a different y/n, that’s why I didn’t say anything” he explains.

You take a deep breath as you realize you have to apologize for going off on him just now, you believe him but you hate apologizing.

“well, I feel like an ass for going off on you like that after hearing all this” you chuckle “I’m sorry” you eye him shortly before looking back on the road.

“it’s okay, you don’t have to apologize I get how it looked, very much sus” he laughs with you.

-

Coming back to your car after you took a bathroom break on a highway rest-stop, you see hyunjin sitting in the drivers seat.

“what do you think you’re doing?” you smile as you sit down on the passenger seat.

“I thought maybe you’d like to sleep since its dark already and you’ve been driving for almost 3 hours” he suggests while putting on his seatbelt.

“well, I wont say no to that” you shrug and put your seatbelt on as well.

“so when did you go blonde?” you ask curiously.

“uh- around end of june” hyunjin chuckles “it was a dare if I’m being honest but I ended up liking it and got it redone”

“oh okay” you check out his profile once more and follow his hair with your eyes “I like it”

“yea?”

“yea, which is weird cause I’m usually not into blondes at all” you wonder.

“hm” he grins “must be me then” he says before winking at you.

“pfff, in your dreams” you rebuttal playfully, at which he laughs and mumbles a ‘true’.

You don’t react to it because you think your ears are playing tricks on you.

“hey I have a question too” hyunjin says.

“what’s up” you lean your arm against the window as you look over at him.

His face is slightly lit by the lights of the other cars, no seriously, how can a side profile be so perfect?

“why did you even agree to take me with you if you thought I ghosted you?” he grins.

You laugh “well, I’m a nice person and I know not a lot of people there are from seoul and my mom raised me right, okay?”

“okay okay” he giggles, the way his eyes crinkle when he does makes you smile everytime.

“or…did you have such a good time with me on new years that you just had to jump on this opportunity?” he quips, carefully stealing a peek at you.

“sure, why do you think I was so upset when you didn’t text” you feign sadness.

The both of you laugh before falling into comfortable silence.

When looking outside your window, you think back to said new years eve.

-(flashback)

“oh my god” you said, stepping into the big hall that usually is the universities gym. But whoever planned this outdid themselves.

A dj was placed on one of the tribunes and a whole buffet of drinks and punches on the other, as well as a big disco ball hanging from the ceiling, making the room shimmery and shiny.

You could see people coming out of the doors that connected into the universities hall on one side and into the locker rooms on the others, as if it wasn’t already packed.

“this is fucking insane” lia, your roommate from last semester, squeaked while grabbing your arm and jumping a little, her voice overpowering the blasting music..

“I wanna get fucking hammered tonight” you turned to her.

“oh babe don’t worry,  we didn’t come here to drink soda” she laughed before spotting some of your other friends.

About five minutes before midnight you and some more girls gathered at the buffet of drinks and started doing shots.

You all had decided that instead of kissing someone at 12 o’clock you’d ring in 2020 with a shot, because alcohol can’t cheat on you.

You were laughing at something when some people started the countdown.

10!

9!

8!

7!

6!

5!

4!

3!

2!

1!

“HAPPY NEW YEAR”

Every one shouted and celebrated in union as you downed your shot.

“happy new year babe” lia hugged you after downing hers.

“happy new year!” you shouted into her ear, full of relief that this stressful year was over.

“lets do another one” she grinned widely after your whole friend group had shared their wishes with each other.

A girl you didn’t know very well handed you another shot, just as you emptied your glass you heard a guy yell something before stumbling into your back.

“jesus” you stumbled forward a bit before turning around, ready to throw someone a dirty look.

“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” in front of you suddenly stood a tall dark haired young man with almost too perfect facial features, frowning a little out of concern.

“nothing happened” you smiled, taking a step towards him so he’d hear you better.

“I’m glad” he replied, a grin slowly stretched across his handsome face

“I’m y/n” you giggled as you held out your hand.

His eyes crinkled with his smile as he took your hand in his “I’m hyunjin” he said before pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.

“okay guys let her have her fun lets go over there” you hear lia usher your friends away from behind you.

“happy new year y/n” he said before instinctively pulling you a little closer to him when a group of people passed behind you.

“happy new year hyunjin” you replied, a slow blush creeping on your face from how intensely he was taking in your appearance.

“well yea happy fucking new years to me for running into you” he joked before taking a sip, your brain wasn’t able to function anymore so you just giggled and nervously pushed your hair behind your ear.

It had been way too long since you’d talked to a guy, especially someone as attractive as him

“you’re fucking stunning” hyunjin complimented you and lifted your hand with his to make you spin for him, to which you complied because you took a long time getting ready and always appreciate being appreciated.

“thank you” you were crimson red by now but hoped he wouldn’t see because of the dimmed lights.

“how come I’ve never seen you around? I would’ve remembered you” he tilted his head.

“oh this was my first year here and I live on the other side of campus so…” you nodded slowly “but yea I would’ve remembered you too”

He grinned before downing his drink and putting on the table next to the both of you.

“wanna dance?”

That’s how you found yourself on the dance floor with hyunjin pressed against your back.

Slowly but surely the alcohol made you braver; and it didn’t take long for the dj to play perfect songs to grind yourself against his toned body to.

His reaction was instant, hands gripping even harder at your waist and his own movements matching your own.

You looked back at him just to have the air knocked out of your lungs, a barely there sheen of sweat was covering his forehead; his pupils were dilated and his lips were slightly parted before his tongue swiftly swept over his lower lip.

He looked like sex on legs and moved like it too.

His plump lips formed into a grin when he noticed you staring, you didn’t know if it was the alcohol running through your system but you so desperately wanted to kiss him.

“can’t stop looking at you either, pretty” he lowered his head to mumble against your cheek before pressing a kiss there.

“you’re so goddamn sexy” you blurted out as you turned around to face him, running one of your hands through his dark hair before positioning them on his firm chest.

He threw back his head as his chest vibrated with laughter.

“don’t laugh at me” you laughed as you locked eyes again.

“you’re cute when you’re drunk” hyunjin brought one hand to your face to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

“you dont even know me sober” you giggle “also i’m not drunk!” you protested playfully, his hands found your waist in the meantime to pull you flush to his body; at which you gasped almost inaudibly.

“oh really?” he looked down at you, clearly amused “didn’t you drink like 5 shots half an hour ago?”

“well well well, I didn’t know I had an audience” you countered, looping your arms around his neck.

Hyunjin prodded at the inside of his cheek with his tongue before looking away for a swift second, slightly embarrassed because he just exposed himself.

You felt yourself gush a little when he licked his lips again after bringing his gaze back to you.

“so you almost knocked me over on purpose?” you grinned even bigger when he shook his head laughingly.

“listen” he chuckled, leaning down unnecessarily close because you could hear him perfectly fine but you weren’t going to complain.

“I actually didn’t run into you on purpose, that was my friends doing after he saw me notice you” he said.

You mouthed an ‘ahh’ while nodding, feigning disbelief.

“I’m serious” hyunjin laughed “I still have to thank him later; I would’ve probably chickened out”

He got quieter at the end of his sentence, his eyes jumping to your lips when you wet your lower lip with your tongue quickly.

“i-m glad he pushed you then” you replied, trying to hide the fact that your heart was pumping your blood in record time.

“yea” he inched his face closer to yours as you tilted your chin up to meet him in the middle “me too”

His eyes switched from your lips to your eyes one more time before closing the gap between the both of you.

His lips were firm but soft at the same time in the way they moulded against yours, you swore you could hear lia squealing from somewhere but maybe you were just hearing things.

But when his tongue touched yours in the most tentative way you lost contact to what was going on around you, slinging your arms tighter around his neck and deepening the kiss.

A tiny groan escaped hyunjins throat when you carded your fingers through his hair to tug on it and release some of the adrenalin that rushed through you.

He was slow and explorative and let you take control from time to time before sucking on your lower lip and making you loose it.

You didn’t know how many songs had passed; to be honest you didn’t even remember what song was playing when you started kissing.

All you knew in that moment was hyunjins lightly flushed cheeks, swollen lips and dark glistening eyes.

“let’s go somewhere else?” he questioned in a whisper when you bit your lip, nodding at his question.

He grabbed your hand in his before manoeuvring the both of you through the dancing and celebrating crowd.

Before you knew it, hyunjin pulled you into the entrance hall of the university where multiple people had the same idea as you.

Couples scattered across the big room, some just talking, most of them however making out heavily.

“come on” he softly tugged at your hand, smiling when your gaze falls on him.

He lead you up the big flight of stairs onto a floor of the building you’ve never been to, stopping in front of a random room before pulling a small set of keys out of his back pocket.

After unlocking the door, he opened it to let you step inside.

It was a dance studio, the wall right across from you was just one huge mirror through which you could see the big couch in the back of the room and the water dispensers next to it.

“why do you have the keys for this room?” you asked, giggling.

Hyunjin grinned as he closed the door “I’m a dance major, we all have keys for the practice rooms”

“that’s so cool” you beamed “I wish I could dance” you looked around the room, walking towards the mirrored wall a little bit.

“you were moving just fine earlier” hyunjin came up behind you, nimble hands finding your waist as he looked you up and down through the mirror intensely, now that you were under the bright lights of the room.

You couldn’t help but to smile a little at that, the tight little glitter dress that you had chosen really did accentuate your curves in the best way possible, paired with the cute black heels which made your legs look way longer than they actually are.

“but that was like club sexy dancing, you know?” you elaborated.

“hm” he hummed amusedly “whats wrong with sexy club dancing?” you turned around to him.

He didn’t look to shabby himself, all in black, a chic button up with some jeans and a belt; accessorized with rings on his pretty fingers, a  dainty silver necklace and some small earrings.

Some might say he was underdressed, but the way he carried himself with such confidence, and that face of his must for sure be a panty dropper, you thought.

“nothing but… I don’t know, teach me something” you pleaded.

“what do you want me to teach you?” he laughed.

“I don’t know a pirouette or something” you suggested, laughing as well.

“okay” he grinned “this is like the base stance” he positioned himself correctly before looking at you to see if you were following his instructions.

“mhm” you hummed, replicating what he was doing.

“and then you get momentum with one leg to be able to swing yourself around, like this” hyunjin explained before executing a perfect pirouette and ending it back in the base stance.

“that was fast” you chuckled.

“your turn” he grins before moving behind you “try to keep your eyes on yourself in the mirror otherwise you’ll loose balance”

“okay” you said unsurely.

“I’ll catch you if you fall” he winked at you, at which you scoff playfully before carefully swinging yourself into a pirouette.

You landed on wobbly legs but before you could tip over hyunjin stabilized you with a firm grip on your hips.

“you’re a natural” he grinned at you through the mirror.

“well thank you” you playfully feigned cockiness before he spun you around himself.

A few seconds pass of the both of you taking in each others features in silence, the only thing you could hear was the faint music of the party downstairs, before hyunjin spoke up.

“can I kiss you?”

You fell into giggles again as you let your forehead rest against his collarbone before looking up again “we’ve kissed before”

“yea but that was like a moment and I don’t want to catch you off guard or anything” he mumbles cutely.

“mm” you nod “ you can kiss me”

And with a smile, he does.

You weren’t surprised when his first gentle ministrations turned into more desperate ones rather quickly because you could feel the warmth spread in your lower regions as well.

He walked the both of you over to the couch, only parting from your lips when he sat down on the black leather material of the couch.

“come here, pretty girl” he took your hand to help you straddle him, your dress riding up but you couldn’t care less if he saw your safety shorts, and he didn’t seem to care either by the way he feverishly connected your lips again.

His hands travelled down to squeeze at your waist before smoothing over your ass and grabbing a handful of each cheek, you moaned into the kiss when you realized how big his hands were.

Your own hands were squeezing at his shoulders before one moved into his soft hair while the other softly rested on his cheek.

The kiss was messy and desperate, teeth clinking together and tongues licking at each other.

The things that riled you up the most however were his groans and praises.

“you’re so fucking sexy” he groaned before moving down to kiss at your jaw and down your neck.

A needy whimper escaped from your throat when he started suckling the sensitive skin at the base of your throat.

“fuck-hyunjin” you moaned when his teeth grazed over your clavicle.

Your hands fumbled before landing on his belt, at which he pulled away from your skin, gently taking your hands off of his belt.

“I’d love to take you out first, actually” his pretty kiss swollen lips twitched up into a shy smile as he pants.

“oh” you were taken aback, you were almost certain that this was something regular for him “I thought-“

“I mean if you just want to fuck we can fuck of course” he chuckled “but- I actually think you’re really cute and fun and I’d love to get to know you better”

Your mouth stood a little agape “uh- I mean-I” you stuttered, your brain not functioning properly because of the alcohol running through your veins but also him!

“its okay if you just want, you know-“

“no!” you blurted out all over sudden, making him flinch a little “sorry, uhm- its just been a while since I had a date” you smile apologetically.

His expression visibly brightens “that’s okay” he giggled “so is that a yes?”

You grinned, leaning in to just barely brush your lips with his, his head twitching upwards in an attempt to connect them fully.

“yes” you whispered, at which he smiled brightly before pulling your in for a kiss by your neck.

-(flashback end)

“y/n”

“hey, y/n” you grumble when you feel someone gently rocking your shulder.

“mmm-what?” you peek your eyes open just to see hyunjin smile at you.

“good morning sunshine” he teases as you sit up in your seat when you realize you aren’t driving anymore.

“just kidding its not morning” he says as you look around your car, realizing your on a parking lot.

“where the fuck are we?” you whip your head towards him “did you bring me here to kill me? kidnap me?”

“wha?- no” he laughs “no, I’m sorry. Right after you fell asleep there was this huge traffic jam because of an accident and we stood there for almost 3 hours so I drove off and found this” he points out the rear window, where you see a small motel building.

You look back at him before checking the time on your phone, seeing it was indeed almost midnight.

“fuck” you swear to yourself.

“I didn’t know if you wanted to keep driving because I was getting tired so I thought maybe-“ hyunjin starts rambling guiltily, not wanting you to thing that this was an attempt to get in your pants.

“hey” you put your hand on his shoulder after taking off your seatbelt “this is good, you made the right decision I think we both could use some sleep” you say.

You each take your suitcases and walk inside, it’s an old building but it looks pretty clean for a motel off of the highway.

“good evening you two” an old lady sits behind the, probably just as old, reception.

“good evening, could we get 2 single rooms, please” hyunjin speaks up politely.

“I’m afraid we only have 2 double bed rooms available, if you’d like to take them, they will however be more expensive than the rooms for one” she explains politely.

“its okay, we’ll take one of those, please” you decide, hyunjins head snapping towards you.

“is that okay?” you ask him.

“yea- sure” he nods.

“alright, room 301 it is” she hands you the key before stating that you’ll have to checkout before 12 pm and what the room costs.

“do you accept card?” hyunjin asks at which the friendly old lady nods before taking his card and swiping it through her little machine.

“I’ll venmo you half of what you paid” you say after unlocking room 301.

He tsk’s at you before shaking his head “don’t, it was my idea so I’ll pay”

“are you sure?” you ask closing the door behind you when he turns on the lights.

“yup-oh” he exclaims.

“this room is cute” you say, it’s small but the walls are a soft sunflower yellow, decorated with paintings of autumn leaves .

The bed looks clean, and when you smell the mouse gray blankets and pillows, they smell fresh as well.

“stop smelling the pillows” hyunjin laughs.

“I’ve never been to a motel, I thought everything would be dirty or ancient” you confess comically.

He chuckles as he comes out of the small bathroom “the bathroom is clean too, don’t worry” he says when you look at him expectantly.

“I’ll sleep on the floor if you want” he offers as you open your suitcase to get out your toothbrush and pj’s.

“it’s fine, hyunjin I’ve slept in the same bed as a male before” you joke.

“well how am I supposed to know that?” he counters, at which you throw your pj shorts at him out of reflex.

When you realize what you had done it was too late, he was already holding them out in front of him before giggling.

“very cute choice” he mocks the small white shorts with red hearts all over it.

“stoop” you whine, trying to fish it out of his hands but he holds them over his head like a kindergartener.

“I remember why I don’t like you” you pout, crossing your arms.

His face drops alongside with his arms “I thought we were past that”

You use his moment of weakness to snatch your shorts out of his hands “gotcha”

-

“see I told you I was gonna take you out” hyunjin beams at you before looking down at the various snacks he took from the motels vending machine, which were laying in between the both of you on the bed.

“and so luxurious too” you joke, crossing your legs.

“only the best for you” he grins when you open a pack of fruit jellies.

“you know, I was thinking about new years” you say “ and I realized that it was your fault!”

Hyunjin throws his head back as he groans playfully “why?”

“if you hadn’t lost your phone when we got back downstairs, I wouldn’t have had to write my number on your arm; or you could’ve just given me your number and I could’ve text you. But you didn’t even know your own number!” you laugh in reminiscence.

“listen” he laughs “I was drunk and you’re hot! I couldn’t think” he defends himself before taking a bite off a chocolate bar.

You blush a little but play it off with a laugh.

“but yes, I admit, it was indeed my fault” he dramatically holds his hand in front of his eyes.

“yeeees!” you exclaim victoriously.

“I’m kidding though” you pat his knee “I forgive you”

“I’m glad” he smiles.

After the both of you are done eating way too many sweets, you find yourself being really comfortable when talking to hyunjin.

He’s funny, doesn’t seem like he’s full of himself and just in general seems like a very kind person.

“I thought you were a fuckboy when me met” you confess, looking at him.

Propped on one elbow looking down at you, while you lay on your side towards him, his face illuminated only by the little lights on each of your nightstands.

“you did?” he asks confusedly.

“yea” you chuckle “you were so confident and…sexy I don’t know” you place your hand over your face in embarrassment.

“oh that was the liquid courage talking, I’m usually pretty shy” he shakes his head smilingly when you peek through your fingers.

“don’t lie” you push his shoulder softly.

“I’m serious!” he laughs.

“you were the first guy to approach me at a party” you pause “like ever”

“no way, you’re lying now” he furrows his brows.

“nope” you shake your head.

“but I was really close to not talking to you as well, I’m sure there were many guys before me that just didn’t have the liquid courage, like I did” he speculates.

“maybe” you say.

“have any exes?” he asks after a few seconds.

“yea, one”

“well how did you meet him?”

“he showed me around on my first day of freshman year, I transferred like in the middle of the first semester so I wasn’t with any other freshmen” you tell him.

“why’d you break up if I may ask?” hyunjin asks carefully.

“oh we were only together for like three weeks, you can’t even call I relationship. He used me to make his hot ex jealous and cheated on me with her” you say “but hey they’re back together at least” you scoff.

“i’m sorry” he mumbles at which you look up at him.

“it’s not your fault” you chuckle.

“well, still no one should feel that way” he says “you know that you were way too good for him right?”

You nod.

“what about you? Have any exes?” you ask back.

He snickers “only one in seoul”

“why didn’t you last?”

“it was a long distance situation, she was super jealous and couldn’t trust me. which I can understand to a certain degree but everytime I went out she wanted me to facetime her and show her what kinds of people were there with me. That was just too much” he explains.

“wow” you chuckle “that doesn’t sound fun either”

Hyunjin shakes his head “nope, but hey we got rid of ‘em, didn’t we?”

“yea” you giggle “plus if I hadn’t broken up with him I would’ve probably never gone to the new years eve party”

“I guess I owe him something then” he grins as you scooch up on the bed.

“can I kiss you?” you ask after a few seconds of silence.

“hm?” hyunjins eyes almost spring out of his head.

“I don’t want to catch you off guard” you grin as you repeat his words from the night you met, sitting up.

He licks his lower lip as a grin stretches over his face as he sits up as well “do your worst”

You get up on your knees to shuffle over to him, when you get close enough hyunjin grabs one of your thighs and lifts it over his legs so you’re straddling him.

Once you sit down on his lap, your eyes lock again and you’re once again baffled as to how someone can be so god damn attractive.

His eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips expectantly, a shaky breath leaving his lips when you lean in.

Your lips connect and it feels like all the pent up energy of liking him since that night finally gets set free, sparks glowing behind your lit and his hands leaving a trail of fire where ever they go.

They squeeze at your thighs and waist, pulling you impossibly close to himself.

A whimper tears from your throat when his tongue licks at yours, he tastes like chocolate and what could only be described as him.

He moans into the kiss when you tug at the blonde locks that weren’t pulled back into the ponytail; before pulling the hair tie out of his hair to free it and finally card your fingers through all of the blonde glory.

Before you realize what’s going on, hyunjin lifts the both of you before dropping you on your back and crawling above you.

The fact that he just lifted the both of you from a sitting position as if you weigh nothing makes you feel all types of hot.

“you’re so hot holy shit” you pant as you push his long hair out of his face.

“ditto” he only grins before attaching his lips to your exposed collarbone and sucking a bruise into the skin.

“take it off” you moan as you tug on the dark blue calvin klein shirt he’s wearing.

His lips release the skin of your collarbone before sitting up to pull the shirt over his head.

If your mouth wasn’t already open from your heavy breathing, you would’ve opened it now because his body is more sculpted and toned than you had expected.

Your hand lifts to smooth over his abs, muscles flexing as he connects your lips again.

His one hand slides from your waist up to cup one of your breasts, gently palming the soft flesh.

“I know I said I wanted to take you out first but-“ he mumbles against your lips.

“you bought me a lovely dinner” you interrupt him, threading your fingers through the hair that’s falling down into his vision.

He grins, dropping a short peck to your lips before his the grin gets wiped off his face “I don’t have a condom with me”

“I’m on the pill” you let him know “I got tested before the lockdown and I haven’t been with anyone since soo…”

“yea, me too, I was tested a few months ago” he nods.

You nod back, biting your lip as you absently play with his hair.

“do you trust me?” hyunjin asks, observing your demeanour.

“yea- yea I do I’m just nervous” you smile awkwardly.

“no” he coos before kissing you “why are you nervous?”

“just haven’t been with anyone for a while” you confess.

Hyunjin nods understandingly “if you don’t want to do this we’ll stop”

“no I really want to” you look into his eyes as confidently as you can.

“okay” he smiles, planting his lips on yours again.

“can i?” his voice gives you goosebumps when he mumbles against the sensitive skin under your ear, his fingers slowy undoing the loose knot of your heart shorts.

“yes” you say when he locks eyes with you.

“I love these shorts” he softly presses a kiss to your knee, trying to calm your nerves a little, before he gently rocks your hips to pull them off of you.

You blush a little out of embarrassment but smile when you lift your hips to help him.

“cute” he whispers when he see’s your panties have a little bow on the front.

He chuckles when you hide your face in embarrassment, pulling you closer to him again by your thighs before you let him kiss you again.

“can I take this off too?” hyunjin whispers, softly pulling at the fabric of the tank top you’re wearing, at which you nod.

You are still wearing a bra when he pulls it off so you take it into your own hands and unclasp your bra.

Your nipples stiffen a little at the sudden exposure to air, as well as to hyunjin’s admiring gaze.

“fuck” he muses when palming your breasts in his big hands, gently pushing them together an running his thumbs over your nipples.

A whimper involuntarily leaves your lips when he wraps his plump lips around one of the perked up nubs and sucks gently.

“so fucking pretty, princess” you feel yourself pathetically clench around nothing at his praise.

You feel one of his hands wander downwards to provide some friction for you, he slots his lips against yours when you tentatively roll your hips against his hand.

Hyunjin feels his cock get even harder when an almost desperate moan tumbles from your lips against his. So he ads a little more pressure and starts circling your clit with two fingers, your sighs of pleasure mixing into the kiss.

“you’re so sensitive baby” he whispers as he parts his lips from yours “can I go down on you?” he grazes his lips over your chest, looking up at you seductively.

You nod as you bite your lip, hyunjin placing a few kisses on your tummy before shortly sitting up to also free you from your soaked panties.

The first stripe he licks up your slit, and how he swirls the tip of his tongue around your clit expertly sends you to heaven.

His hands are gripping your thighs to prevent you from closing your legs, your hands are tangled in his hair and the sheets.

“hyunj-fuck” you cry out when his tongue enters you.

He carefully prods one finger at your entrance “is that okay?” he asks, his voice hoarse and dripping with lust.

“yea” you sigh.

Once you adjust to one finger, he adds a second one, curling them upwards to search for that specific patch inside of you.

“yes-fuck right there” you moan when his fingers press onto the sweetest spot inside of you, tugging at his hair a little harshly. But you feel him moan against you, getting lost in your taste as he sucks your clit in between his soft lips.

Your hips buckle against his mouth as your eyes roll backwards, feeling the warmth of your orgasm approach rapidly.

“fuck fuck yes-hyunjin” you cry out just before he tipped you over the edge with his skillful ministration, your orgasm rushing up your spine and into your head, endorphins spreading everywhere.

A cry of pleasure fills the room as your thighs starts trembling with the aftershocks, clamping around his head when he drives you into overstimulation.

“oh-shit-“ you pant as you softly pushed on his forehead to get him away from your clit, his fingers still inside you, guiding you through your high.

He nibbles on your inner thigh apologetically. You can still hear your heartbeat in your ears after hyunjin removes his fingers from you and sits up, gently holding your legs together to help you calm down.

“fuck” you mewl, a soft smile tugging at his lips.

He’s wanted to do this for so long and there you are, with all of your naked glory in front of him.

While he’s daydreaming about you, you sit up and start fiddling with his sweatpants.

“you want more?” he quips, once he realises what you’re doing, leaning in to kiss you.

“mhm” you humm into the kiss affirmitavely when his hand holds you close to him by your jaw.

With a quick last peck to your lips he simultaneously shimmies the soft black sweats and his boxers off of himself.

You apparently visibly gulp at the sight of his cock because hyunjin smirks cockily “like what you see?” as he crawls above you again, his lips finding yours again and not waiting for an answer.

“I don’t know if you’ll fit” you mumble when he suckles at the soft nook of skin under your ear.

“we can stop here” he offers softly before locking eyes again.

You shake your head as you reach down to fist his length, slowly pumping it and smearing the few drops of precum around.

“no, you’re just really big” you huff with a shy smile on your lips at which hyunjin groans.

“you’re gonna be the death of me, you know?” he mutters against your lips before kissing you deeply, his hand smoothing over the slope of your waist before coming up to gently pinch at one of your nipples.

Eliciting a soft high pitched moan from you, this only spurs him on.

Rolling his tongue against yours desperately and making you taste yourself before sinfully sucking at the wet muscle.

All the while you’re stroking him with your small hand before cupping his balls, as if he didn’t already feel like he’s gonna blow his load way too early.

“please” you whine, guiding his reddened tip towards your entrance.

Hyunjin releases a shaky breath before replacing your hand with his, rutting his hips against yours a few times, coating his length in your wetness.

This already had your toes curling, suppressing a whine as you lock your legs around his waist.

“tell me if it hurts, yea?” he breathes, only pressing inside you after you nod, dropping a kiss to your swollen lips.

“fuck” he swears softly, tucking his face in the crook of your neck when he breaches your tight walls for the first time.

Your fingers tighten in his hair at the back of his neck when a subtle sting flares up inside of you.

“ah-“ your body flinches a little when he presses further inside, hyunjin notices, observing your expression before kissing your cheek and sitting up slowly.

“you’re doing so good, baby” he lifts his thumb to his lips, swiftly kitten-licking the digit before bringing it to where your bodies join.

Gently rolling your clit under his thumb to distract you from the pain.

“you look so perfect like this” his other hand travels over your stomach to gently squeeze at your breasts “all spread out for me”

You whimper, arching your back when hyunjin thrusts into you carefully; the pain slowly subsiding and the ache to be fully filled up by him growing exponentially when his cock rubs against your g spot.

“hyunjin” you moan, gripping onto his hand, which is resting atop your breast.

“yes baby, I’m here” he groans at how tight you feel once he’s balls deep inside of you, abandoning your clit to grab you by the hips for leverage.

His other hand resting on your cheek now, after a few trusts you moan “harder, please”

Hyunjin groans and fulfils your wish, at one particularly harsh thrust, you latch your lips around his pointer and middle finger, sucking at them.

“oh my god-that’s so fucking hot” he grunts through clenched teeth.

His cock dragging along your walls deliciously, filling you up to the brim as you hum around his slender fingers in pleasure.

“you like my hands that much baby?” his jaw is clenched and the grip on your waist is rough , the contrast to how sweet he was just a few minutes earlier had you clench around him furiously.

“fuck-“ he breathes when you nod to the best of your abilities, eyes wide open and holding his gaze.

You only release his fingers from in between your lips in favour for a loud high pitched moan when his other hand finds your clit again, rubbing harsh circles into the bud.

“-gonna cum-huynjin” you dig your nails into his biceps, eyes squeezing shut.

“yea?” he grits through his teeth the fingers that were previously trapped in your mouth now wrapping around your bared throat.

Not squeezing tightly, just resting there as if to show you that you’re his now.

Your thought gets confirmed when he rasps “you’re gonna date me after this, right pretty girl?”

You do look so pretty right now, tits bouncing and skin slapping because of the fast rhythm that he’s snapping his hips into yours, not to mention the subtle sheen of sweat that’s coating the both of you.

A desperate breathy chuckle tumbles from your lips “ yes-yes fuck” you feel your second orgasm creeping up on you.

“cum for me princess, all over my cock” he urges you on, his tip hammering into the sweet spot inside of you repeatedly before you crash into your second high of the night.

Your body convulses in pleasure as you call out his name mixed with profanities, your toes curling so hard you’re not sure if you can ever uncurl them again, and your nails probably leaving painful indents in his skin.

His thumb on your clit slows down until you grab his hand for him to stop, his hand around your neck grabs your free one, holding both of your hands over your head now.

“so good, baby” he mumbles, kissing your lips; mostly just breathing into each other as he rocks you through every wave of your orgasm.

Hyunjin looses himself in you not long after with a guttural moan and his eyes squeezing shut.

You coax him through it when he rests his face against your neck again, running your fingertips through his damp hair and over his broad back, muscles tensing under your gentle touch.

i“don’t fall asleep on me” you whisper sneakily, grinning when he chuckles against your neck, tickling the soft skin there.

He props himself up again to scan over your features, pushing some hair out of your face before kissing you tenderly.

“you okay?” his hand resting at your temple as he gently runs his thumb over your hairline.

“more than” you assure him, cupping his cheeks to pull his lips onto yours again.You think you can never get enough of his lips, anything about him for that matter; not when he makes you feel so cared about and safe.

“so does this mean we’re dating now?” he whispers after he has cleaned you up and tucked the both of you in bed.

“hmh” you nod your head sleepily, positioned on his bare chest.

“so I can spoon you once we fall asleep?” he asks, grin evident in his voice.

“you can spoon me but you can’t wake me up in the middle of the night if you get horny” you mumble jokingly, enjoying his fingers running down your spine as your eyelids get heavier.

“okay” he giggles softly, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head before you whisper your good nights to each other.

And as promised, he doesn’t wake you up in the middle of the night because he’s horny.

It’s you who wakes him, because after 10 months of wasted time, you have a lot of catching up to do.

-

a/n: oml this is my first ever long fic so pls pls pls give me feedback, i had so much fun writing his even though it made me feel even more single but hey :))))

allsooo i waited til after work to publish this and i just saw i hit 500 followers?!?!?! thats crazy to me omg i started this like 2 months ago and so many ppl liked my stuff so much that they decided to follow me?? so i just wanna say thank u thank u thank u for hitting the follow button even though im very unorganized and everything i do is spontaneaous and not thought out well. but hey i guess there is a reason that u followed me so thank u!

(i’d love if u sent me an ask with the first one of my writings that u stumbled across, and how <3 ...only if u want tho no pressure) 

anyways thank u so much for reading if you’ve made it this far! i hope you have a great day/ night! much love

-aj

(this is a work of fiction and does not represent the real actions of stray kids or hwang hyunjin)