#I don't think i said nothing here

[supersecretmetalocalypseblog]

I know everyone's already said shit like this but that shot where Dick Knubbler kisses the production booth or whatever in AOTD? profound. I feel that scene in my heart and soul and also in all of my bones. It's so tender and sweet. This shot was just so overwhelming for me for some reason, when I think about it i get teary eyed. It just feels like it has so much emotion and stuff in it, i feel it all at once. it's like "oh he's the individual ever! that's dick knubbler!! i love him???? Yeah okay this rocks! This movie rocks!"

And then i get mad and i'm like "there's no god damn way i'm getting emotional over a character named DICK KNUBBLER??????"

^^^^shots like these are going to put me in an early grave!

(A bit more below the cut here, but this is where spoilers for the plot are gonna be, so watch ur back if you haven't seen Army of the Doomstar yet)

NOTHING could've fundamentally prepare me for how viscerally upset I would feel about him dying. When he first showed up in Dethwater, i was like "yeah, this guy's funny i guess. I like him" but holy shit? and he's not even my favorite metalocalypse character or anything, but this right here? oh it's so over for me. He's so??? why? I get so sad every time I remember these two shots. It's like he's treated with so much respect (aesthetically and writing wise i mean) because they know what they're about to do. Look at him, look at how he's changed. he's serious AND silly! He's got the weight of the world on his shoulders, he's gotta help Dethklok! He's such a real guy, y'know? That's Dick Knubbler! And the way that death is part of the show's gimmick like "haha this is funny look how brutal it is" and then for THIS to happen? and it isn't gory and it isn't funny. It's serene. It's sad. It's emotional, and cinematic and GORGEOUS! There's a kindness and a huge melancholy feeling over the whole scene. HE's so beautiful here, like you know your about to watch an ally fucking die so hard, and he's so chill about it. "this is bigger than me" sort of energy. and he loves Dethklok, and Dethklok loves him! that's why this scene fucking sucks so hard I want to throw up its so good.... idk clearly i'm feeling sappy right now. the long story short is i'm going to kill brendon small for his damages to my emotional state lol.

[gravelsong]

I actually had to stop and take a moment because. Holy shit where do I even start here

Elita's so desperate to keep Optimus on Cybertron that she'll actively sabotage his way of escape (not just his way either, Cliff is still badly wounded and he's now cut off as well). The war has been HELL on her and the planet, we've seen this every time we've seen her on Cybertron. Everyone she's ever loved is either in a constant state of survival, tortured, missing, or dead. She has gone through hell and back to keep it all together, and finally she's found Optimus again, someone who can lead them all, who knows what to do, who can help her keep it together.

But from her view, he doesn’t want to stay. He doesn't want to stay and defend his home, he wants to go back, he wants to leave. Leave behind everything they've worked for, making all of Elita's sacrifice pointless, making the deaths of all their loved ones meaningless. And not just that, but they can use what Shockwave built to save them. It's cruel and disgusts her, but sacrifices have to be made for their survival, even if it means harming another planet. But they have to use it, it has to mean something, because if not, then what was any of this for?

And Optimus, on the other end, is in pain over this choice. No leader wants to make a choice like this, but Optimus has seen what damage his people have done. The damage that his war has brought to them, how they've been killed and wounded at the hands of ones who still remain on Earth. Earth's destruction can't be at their hands, they can't force their losses onto people who never asked to be a part of this, who never had a chance at stopping the decepticons on their own. They can't kill another planet in the name of saving their own. The cycle can't continue.

Even while Elita is holding onto Optimus, screaming about how much she needs him, his other hand is spasming, the weight of what he's doing and what will come from this action very clear, but still painful. And in the end, he choses to protect Earth.

[wouldntbehim]

mix: firstprince (taylor's version)

[front-facing-pokemon]

[adustoflove]

I always think well if I dated a man, I wouldn't feel as insane. I wouldn't feel so awful or jealous. And then I remember why I came to the conclusion that I'm a lesbian. I just wouldn't care if it were a man. I just can't bring myself to care about men like that 😔😩😭

[lord-squiggletits]

I think the reason that MTMTE remains the most defining, influential, and loved series in the IDW1 run is fundamentally because, despite its many flaws, MTMTE has the power to make you think and wonder about the world beyond what's shown on the page. The character relationships are so strongly developed that it's easy to care about the characters and easy to imagine further adventures they could go on. While the myriad dropped plotlines, underwritten/underutilized characters, and worldbuilding with weird implications are all fucking maddening at times... even if it makes you mad, MTMTE makes you mad because you care and it makes you want to immerse yourself into a world that feels like it's real beyond what's explicitly shown to you on the page. It's a sandbox of a story where there's so much fertile ground for pretty much anyone with any preferred character archetype, storyline, etc to dig in.

It's just... immersive. That's the best way I can put it. It feels like it could be real and it makes you want to spend more time in it than the constraints JRO had. It makes you want to know more about it and come up with theories on how/why things function or happen the way they do. That's why it's loved and that's why it's the best series in IDW1.

[noirandchocolate]

The Yiga Clan isn’t a cult in my honest opinion.

They’re more like a crime syndicate.

If a crime syndicate was also an oppressed minority group subjected to a genocide in the distant past and continued marginalization in the present as they’re forced to lurk at the edges of and mostly outside society to eke out a living through theft and violence while the “good” members of the same minority who accepted the harsh terms of cultural genocide at the hands of the very people they served get to stand next to every other race that reviles them and call them “evil” and “traitors” because they seek justice against the divine-right monarchy that betrayed them first and have forsworn the goddess who never once deigned to help them.

They're not monsters to be mowed down, they're people. People who engage in genuine and understandable strife against authority figures who uphold systems of inequality.

...

Anyway, that's what I think.

(Edit: For even more of me rambling, see the notes.)

[chayannesegg]

honestly I think it’s kinda interesting how phil’s relationships with wilbur, tallulah, chayanne & tubbo are all reflecting back into his view of sunny tbh. like he has such complex delicate interwoven dynamics with all of them and it all gets thrown onto sunny, this poor kid who he loves in theory, but in practice is a stranger to him. 

like wilbur left tallulah in phil’s care and didn’t come back. even now way after he was initially supposed to, wilbur hasn’t returned (that one day aside). and phil, who had already taken on a big commitment watching tallulah, has been left permanently with two eggs in his sole care. and even though he loves tallulah and wil, and won’t want them out of his life, this is a stress for him. it’s a big undertaking for anyone, to care for two kids alone, but especially since tallulah required a lot of changes in his life.

for better or worse, in many ways phil sees chayanne as an extension of himself. they’re similar in a lot of ways, and often on the same page, and it means phil often struggles to catch up when chayanne’s emotions aren’t on the same page as him. we’ve seen this week, phil having such a hard time understanding the depth and breadth of chayanne’s grief. when he catches on, he usually does a good job empathising and talking it through, but when he doesn’t, he really doesn’t and it can be hard to watch. 

the same is NOT true for tallulah. he has, through hard work and practice, learnt how to identify her emotions. he had to. she needed it. she would have been miserable otherwise. she desperately needed asked for the emotional care and birthdays and consideration that chayanne would never ask for. and he’s good at it—tracking her moods, knowing what upsets her & what she cares about in a way that doesn’t come as naturally with chayanne (or sunny or tubbo or anyone else really expect maybe wilbur). but that took A LOT of time and effort, months of work, and I do think he’s a bit wary of the idea of having to do that again, even when it comes to people he loves like chayanne (or god forbid tubbo).

now tubbo is not wil. tubbo is not phil's son. but he’s still not dissimilar to wil in phil’s mind. whatever the backstory is, phil introduces tubbo to tallulah as an old friend of him and wil’s. he makes tubbo his kids’ godfather. he calls tubbo his boy. he looks out for him. but past those first few weeks, their relationship doesn’t progress. they mean a lot to each other bc of their pasts, but they don’t put any work into upkeeping their relationship and phil in particular doesn’t reflect at all on what how that changes their dynamic. and it does change it—this is clear in purgatory, with phil having zero trust in tubbo to protect chayanne and tallulah, and after, with tubbo endlessly poking at phil’s sore spots trying to illicit a reaction he’ll never receive. 

it's also clear in the way phil has no understanding of what’s going on with tubbo. if he’s struggling to grasp chay’s emotions, he’s not even touching what’s going on in tubbo’s head. tubbo’s death makes no sense to him. it’s sudden. it’s random. it’s illogical. it’s stupid. he wasn’t joking about having two lives? he still took a death bet with richas? he’s not come back? he can’t come back? he’s left phil with distraught kids for no reason with no warning. he doesn’t see the erratic suicidal behaviour, the unending depression, the desperation to be loved. he doesn’t want to see it. he doesn’t want something to be wrong with tubbo, but he also doesn’t even know how to see what’s wrong. he’s annoyed he’s having to deal with it and he desperately desperately wants to believe this is all happening for no reason.

bc at the forefront of phil’s mind is still his love for tubbo. of course, phil would drop everything to help tubbo (if he could recognize something was wrong). of course, he would care for sunny as his own. of course, he would make the same sacrifices he’s made for wil. and he assumes he’ll have to. he thought that sunny would now be under his care. that he’d have to figure out the logistics of a third egg to care for. with wilbur, phil was the only person who could ever have taken care of tallulah. the only person he trusted, the only person who knew tallulah enough. now this isn’t true for tubbo. it’s a genuinely illogical assumption for phil to make: three eggs would be a genuine burden on him; they've never spoken about it; there’s a long list of people who would tubbo expects for sunny before; and he doesn’t even know sunny well enough to name these people for her as comfort.

but still in the moment, alone with tubbo’s eggs and dealing with everything he left behind, phil can only think that the exact same thing that happened before will happen: he alone will be left to care for another scared hurt kid of someone he loves.

and here we come to sunny. a kid whose dad he loves. a kid whose dad he doesn’t understand. a kid whose dad is suddenly gone like his son is gone. a kid who would need him like his daughter needs him. a kid who his son needs to protect. a kid he cares for. a kid he can’t afford to care for, a kid he wasn’t expecting to care for, a kid he doesn’t know how to care for, a kid he would care for if he needed to, a kid he doesn’t know why he’s been left to care for. a kid who is somehow a reflection of all these people he loves but not someone he knows at all.

idk i think this tension comes out in the a lot of the comments phil makes of and to sunny. he doesn't know them well enough to distinguish them from his relationships with other people. and as long as no one challenges him on that, we'll continue to hear these misplaced comments from him, that come across so insensitively, even as he tries his best to genuinely help them and their dad.

[ravencromwell]

Fuck, just had a hell of a Holland realization, which everyone else probably realized years ago but indulge my horror: The Danes have their stone statue garden of traitors. And the only thing we've ever seen in WL that can turn people to stone is As Staro. The command Holland used to kill his fucking brother. The idea of him having to replicate that kill over and over with the traitors the Danes wanted to make sharpest examples of, and then walk past those kills every fucking day? I have nothing else to say except it's a fucking crime Holland didn't get the same sort of triumphant, bloody fight against the Danes Lila got against the earth mage who tried to kill her in the tournament, because to say he deserved it so much more is the flimsiest possible understatement.

[icantalk710]

Not a bad get from work's sample sale the other day tbh 😌

[lottieurl]

what the hell is with (mainly white) americans turning extreme racism into a joke but like totally in a progressive way don't worry

[qiu-yan]

in MDZS the novel, the innkeeper in Yunping mentions that people are too scared to go petition Yunmeng Jiang for help because someone once walked in on Sect Leader Jiang whipping a guy in the main hall, supposedly because the guy was a demonic cultivator.

[transfagholmes]

i think I'm going to lose at the gender clinic bc despite being on testosterone for 3 1/2 years and almost 2 years post top surgery i really made it sound like i transitioned bc it seemed cool 2 me. this is true! but the details of the other factors like dysphoria are so deeply personal and also largely in the past that it is v difficult to tell other people about. it feels like I'm betraying the privacy of past me to sell my transgenderism to clinicians that don't give a fuck about me. and like. ik that's the game so maybe i'm the crazy one. but. yeah I'm not describing in detail every time i felt miserable about myself or my body. which is exactly what they want so we r at an impasse. :/

[autistic-beshelar]

ah yes dungeon meshi, the manga where an autistic man gets repeatedly bullied by people he thinks are his friends and not a single person supports him

[longagoitwastuesday]

Every day I am haunted by the fact JJK could be amazing but it will be just idk Bleach or something

[goldiipond]

i;m btreaking thefuck down idont know how much lonhger ican do this i.m shackjinh so hard ohmy fucking god my entire world just got shattered im going to fucking die. im going tofuckinh die