#I don't know how to went from having a brain child to having a 13 page chapter one

[ishipthis]

So I know that you're all patiently waiting for the next chapter of I didn't see this coming, and it's on its way, I promise. (Unexpected emergency room visit be damned!) Butttt in an unexpected turn of events, during all the shenanigans, me and one of my absolute favourite people @gleektasticklaine started writing a new fic together that is going to blow your minds!

Seriously, we are SO EXCITED about it.

So yes, I didn't see this coming IS coming. BUT, so is something else, and it will cruising in to Ao3 and your dashboards sooner than you think. ;)

It's going to be a splash!

[allieslittlewritings]

*not my gif <3

Baby Girl

Summary: Spencer getting a baby daughter

Set in: Season 13-14

Warnings: Spoilers for seasons 8-13 of Criminal Minds, vague mention of abortion, bad writing, an oc!mom

Word count: 900-1k

A/n: I've never posted a fic before so if this sucks and nobody sees it I'm sorry <3

★

Spencer always thought in an ideal world, he would have children.

He never bothered to think of how many, knowing that would be more up to his future wife than to him.

He'd always just assumed he'd get married before having children one day.

After everything that had happened to him, Maeve dying, going to prison, the shit Cat had pulled, finding out his mom had Altzheimer's, and everything else that was certainly less than ideal, he'd started to think more and more that he simply wasn't meant to be a dad.

When a girl he'd only gone on a few dates with, months ago, told him she needed to talk to him, he was confused.

Emma was a nice girl, they just didn't fit well together so their relationship didn't last long.

She'd asked him to meet her at a random coffee shop.

He had the idea of her being pregnant for one second before he convinced himself that was ridiculous.

He entered the coffee shop Emma had chosen and went to sit accross from her.

Some boring small talk followed about how their careers and lives were going.

"Spencer, I'm pregnant." Emma finaally blurted out, clearly nervous.

Spencer had heard a lot of radicalizing things in his life.

A lot of unexpected things had happened to him.

In his line of work, a lot of things altered his perspective and way of thinking.

This one was different.

"You're..." He trailed off in shock.

"Look, I'm gonna be honest, I don't want the baby, but I'm too far along now to get an abortion. I'm about to start looking for potential adoptive parents, but I thought maybe you'd want input on who it goes to, too."

As muddled and confused as Spencer's brain felt, he immediately replied, "No. I'll take it. I mean, I'll take care of it. Of the baby."

"Are you sure you want to do that? You've already got a lot on your plate..." She pointed out.

"I'm sure." He said softly, without an ounce of hesitation.

★

Spencer was in an odd haze everytime he remembered he was about to become a parent.

He knew it wouldn't be easy, taking care of a child and having such a demanding job.

But he also knew he could never live with the knowledge that he had a child somewhere and they're not with them.

If they're with him, he can keep them safe.

He could make sure his child didn't grow up alone, like he did.

★

Spencer and his baby's mother sat quietly in a waiting room.

Spencer was attending his first ultrasound.

He sat, in thought.

A nearly empty cup of coffee in his right hand.

His lip was being lightly picked at with his left.

He took one last sip of his coffee and went to throw the now empty cup away.

His sweaty hands were starting to annoy him.

The restless feeling wouldn't go away.

Emma's name was called and the pair went into the ultrasound room.

Spencer picked at his fingers as he watched Emma and the ultrasound tech set everything up.

Lost in thought, he didn't hear any of the little things the women talked about.

Everything in him froze when he heard it.

A heartbeat.

His baby's heartbeat.

"So, would you like to know the baby's gender?" The doctor asked.

The women looked at Spencer, waiting for an answer.

He stood dumbfoundedly, staring at the grainy image of his baby on the moniter.

Their heartbeat still the loudest, best thing he'd ever heard.

"Spencer?" Emma gently nudged him.

Spencer finally snapped out of his haze and quickly wiped away a stray tear rolling down his face.

"Sorry, what were you saying?"

"Would you like to know the sex of the baby?" The doctor asked again.

"Uh, no. No, I want it to be a surprise." His eyes remained on the moniter, he couldn't pull his eyes away from it.

★

Spencer prepared for the day Emma gave birth as best he could.

He was actually grateful for his sabbaticals now, it gave him a lot more prep time.

He read about a hundred books on labor and childbirth.

And give or take twice as many on actual parenting and child care.

He did as much research as humanly possible.

But one thing he'd learned over the years, is no matter how much research you do or how many books you read, the actual topic you're researching and preparing for is never quite the same.

★

His anxiety in the last few weeks before the baby came skyrocketed.

Worry overtook him nearly every minute of the day.

What if he hasn't done enough?

What if there's something important that slipped his mind?

What if he'll actually be a terrible father and he'll mess up the best thing to ever happen to him?

What if he-

"It's a girl!" The doctor announced.

Much like when he heard his daughter's heartbeat for the first time, he froze.

A girl.

He had a daughter.

She was here.

He watched as the doctors and nurses scurried around doing things, to make sure his baby was well and healthy.

His baby.

He had a baby.

He couldn't take his eyes off of her.

Covered in blood and vernix, his daughter.

Her loud, very infant-like cries filled the room.

Not a new sound to the doctors, they continued with their routine work.

It was the most grounded Spencer had felt in months.

She was here.

His baby was here and she needed him almost as much he needed her.

★

Spencer tiredly rubbed his eyes, the wide range of emotions from the day catching up to him.

He walked tiredly to the room where Y/N was, a hint of confusion on his face.

The exhaustion was evident in his posture and his droopy eyes.

But now was not the time to sleep, he was walking to go be with his daughter.

He entered the room she was in and sat down in a chair next to the basin his baby lay in.

"Hi," He whispered to her, gently resting his hand on her tiny stomach.

His baby gurgled and looked up at him with big eyes.

A tired smile graced his face as he gently stroked his daughter's head.

He could stay there forever.

Just him and his daughter.

She was the most the beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"We're gonna be okay, aren't we?" He quietly asked her.

His baby gripped his finger with her hand, continuing to quietly make baby noises.

"Yeah. We're gonna be okay."

fin. ♡

[lilderitter]

Hello Wise and Knowledgeable One 🙂‍↕️ Would you have any more information about the gang's ages by any chance ? There's this post (https://www.tumblr.com/the-unconquered-queen/746575140157014017?source=share) from @the-unconquered-queen compiling all the canon info to try and determine how old they all are, and I was thinking you and the other writers probably had fun conversations about this, maybe even choosing birthdays...? 👀

Hello! What a very kind greeting when I am just a muppet with a keyboard (albeit probably like a weird Dark Crystal-y muppet). Obligatory I'm not the lead, I was laid off from PB, this is my recollection/understanding, etc. That is an excellent post from the-unconquered-queen (a truly excellent username we stan the original icon always) and matches up to everything we had to work with in the text itself slash that we added in the case of charting Mal's timeline in the Guild. For our internal purposes, we generally tried to treat everyone like they were mid-20s when it came to art, but obviously the characters' life experience and developmental age differ wildly.

What do I mean by "developmental age"? Well, this was a very funny/weird conversation we had to have about Tyril slash the gaps between elf MC vs human and orc MC. Because of the way Book 1 is set up, Kade and MC have to be around the same age (with MC slightly older) regardless of the chosen race, which obviously presented some worldbuilding problems at first glance. If elves are longer lived, one might presume they develop more slowly biologically.

...Until you remember that the elves are a created race with a very specific purpose. Anyone who's been around a two-year-old can tell you that there are some parts of child development one would like to not prolong. And one needs to remember that the elves were created in a... delicate circumstance between Vali and Nifara. So the general understanding we came up with is that elves mature at the same rate as other races and then just... stop aging aside from Light Magic use (pending choices you can make in Book 2). So their current society has now adjusted their notions of what "maturity" is to put things in perspective to how they perceive time and aging. We added the jokes where Tyril talks about being "very young" (or small, I think he says in Book 2?) when he was in his teens to hopefully clarify this because the lore tablets in Book 2 and 3 were targeted toward world expansion rather than those kinds of clarifications, but it was likely too subtle/confusing. My bad!

Basically think about how we're often told in Medieval/Renaissance Europe that 13 is considered the correct age to get a job, get married, etc. We know cognitive science, and we know child development, so we know that the human brain doesn't "stop cooking" for a long while after that, but because of life expectancy, the Medieval Europeans often ended up starting everyone a lot younger in many cases back then. I don't think Tyril was necessarily acting like a toddler at 16, but I think he was probably still being treated like he didn't have full agency yet, because the elves' perception of time is skewed.

For Mal, when we set about his timeline, we had to think about both Wren and Maria, since we roughly knew when his mother died from Book 1, and we didn't want Mal leaving the Guild to put Wren in so much danger that she couldn't take care of herself when he went off adventuring and she stayed in town, so we needed her to be old enough to find a partner. In terms of trauma and emotional regulation, Mal's an interesting one because he's got several points in his life where he could get "developmentally stuck," from his mother's death to his first interaction with the Guild to joining the Reapers, etc. (I swear I will do that Mal mental health / trauma post at some point I swear.)

Nia is in her mid 20s but hasn't been let out of the Temple really until now so she's still bright eyed and bushy-tailed. This is especially fun to contrast with Imtura, who is of a similar age but was doing very, very dangerous things at a young age because she was an orc princess. She earned that captainship with blood, sweat, and tears and was risking her life as a really young kid, just like cabin boys did in our Golden Age of Piracy!

Aerin and Baldur do have a meaningful age gap (i.e. Baldur is too old to be pulling this shit.) because you know Aurinae planned that shit as much as she could. And she's an herbalist so she pretty much could plan it in terms of when things didn't happen. I don't think we ever nailed the gap down super firmly but I'd say the four to five year estimate makes sense. The big thing to remember is that Arlan doesn't plan on dying any time soon so while he doted on Baldur as an heir, I'd say turning 18, etc. wouldn't have been a big deal for either prince because they weren't expected to ascend the throne and royals are generally expected to behave with decorum potentially beyond their years even as children. (WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL BALDUR THAT.)

Valax potentially has a little bit of a Ship of Theseus situation but her memory goes back about 200 years. She's also got the whole child soldier thing going on developmentally so the power dynamic with MC is more complicated than like a standard vampire-mortal romance would be.

I know I didn't really give you exact ages, but that's on purpose. What we needed for the writing was the dynamic each amount of life experience created for the characters as they interacted with each other, so it's more important (and more relevant) that both Mal and Imtura have more life experience generally than Tyril, Nia, MC, and Kade because, you know, having your first job or your first several changes you as a person.

That said, our amazing lead writer did pick the gang's horoscopes way back in the day so I'd say feel free to use that to go nuts in speculating about birthdays. (This interview was also so weird to find again. And sad. Weird and sad. But look at baby me. How cute. And sad.)

[wynn-ing]

just caught up with what remains and fuck im so invested in ur little guys - question tho, how long has each voiced been with their voices? i know eti had para for only a year at the start of the series, and pasha and hunted have been together for his whole life - but what abt the others? sorry if this was mentioned somewhere in whats already written my brain is swiss cheese

also i totally understand if u cant answer this for spoilery reasons

it's not really a spoiler at all! At most some of them may hint some things but nothing that'll make any sense unless it comes up, so here's the list;

Etti: as you said, since about a year before the first fic

Page: a few months before Etienne, so about a year and a half before the first fic

Locke: since they were like 16! Hero showed up in the middle of an exam and they got kicked out for shrieking at the top of their lungs. He's apologetic but they don't mind, it was only Physics. They weren't going to pass anyway, they didn't study for it at all.

Pasha: Hunted showed up when he was only 5. This went exactly as you'd expect for both of them

Loren: summoned the Wild when they were 13, after having been told by the doctor they had maybe 2 years left at best. They figured they'd give alternative medicine (read: summoning a literal god into their body) a chance. It worked! This was 3 years after they first met Pasha btw

Mal: she's had smitten for ... I don't know the exact number of years, she's being cagey, but she got him in uni so anywhere between 18 and 24 depending on when she went to uni. She likes to only reveal things to me when they're funny or dramatic so this info is new to me too. All I knew before was that she's had him for 'a long time'. I actually don't know her exact age either she won't say

Leonore: she's had Oppy for 5 years before her introduction into the book, and you saw the rest in realtime.

Envy: only had Cheated for a few months before their introduction into the story

Violet: similarly only had Contrarian for about 9 months before her introduction.

Kyra: has had Cheated for a year and a half.

Ghost: only got Cold like 2 days before his introduction into the story lol.

Alice: summoned Nightmare as a playmate when she was a child. She was only 15 in the first fic.

Foster: inherited their voice from birth

Forrest: summoned Witch like 2 months before being captured

Larissa: :) you'll find out

Uhhh did I get everyone? Lmk if I missed someone and feel free to ask follow up questions (except about Larissa. Got nothing good to say about her) but yeeeeasss I believe that's all of them! Thank you for being invested in my lil sillies I'm so happy <3 <3 yippeee!

[ovtsakaramel]

Do you have anymore finnick/odesta head cannons i loved your first one!

So sorry this took some time to answer but heres the hcs

🩵Finnick never wanted piercings or tattoos or anything like this but when he had a crush on Annie and saw the kinds of guys she's into he just went to her and asked her to pierce his ear. She, with the experience of piercings her friends, agreed and was just so happy that he trusts her and actually talks to her, and not talking to her only when she goes to annoy him, immediately says yes. His ear got infected the next day but he didn't let her see him until he managed to get it under control so she won't feel guilty and he won't be like that one kid who got an Infection while all the others are cool and edgy. He ended up loving it, but no needles touched his body again.

🩵Finnick has some days where he just locks himself in his house and doesn't do anything and just sits there until the pain eats him alive and he falls asleep. The stinging rotting from the inside covering each organ, his mind already lost and there is nothing but the last face. Then the others. He's back there. The skin starts rotting too from every hit of the imaginary touch. The two rots meet each other in the middle layer of his body and send the destroying fire. He's numb now. Didn't move for the whole day. The numbness goes to his brain and he shuts down. The next morning he wakes up to a knocking too loud to be from anyone other than the woman always ready for an argument, the victor of last year's games - Annie Cresta.

"Wake up you piece of actual fucking shit! Finnick Odair! Wake up, motherfucking idiot!" The only thing that could make him wake up was a voice this annoying. The only motivation to wake up every morning was the hope that he could win in a fight with her. She was his only hope.

"Do I still bring you hope?" Annie is laying on his chest, he dark brown hair shining with a red essence from the morning sun. The red from the anger he had to her once was now the calming red of love that hits her hair with the sun.

"You're both my thirteenth reason and my only reason, fucking spawn of Satan." She throws the blanket over him and stands up, putting her red panties on. Well, maybe he didn't like red on her in one way. "Hey, take them off again, why standing up?"

"I'm mad." She says.

" -ly in love with me?" He gives her puppy eyes.

"Asshole. What you said it's not true."

"That you're my only reason to live? Or that you are my 13th reason?"

"That you have only 13 reasons"

"Ouch." Well, it didn't actually hurt. Sometimes making jokes was the only way to get through it. Thank God he had a girlfriend that can't take anything seriously.

She puts his shirt on and starts doing her makup. At that moment, he realized - there was another reason to live: to learn how tf can this 20 year old woman have the line drawing skills of a 3 year old child. And know that many swear words for every time she fucked up her eyeliner.

[All of these are headcanons that I planned to write separately, but I felt like if I did a car was gonna hit me tmrw] ok so this was also a little not really thought off and it's just a silly thing don't look a lot into if it's realistic or not

🩵Annie despises being called darling. But she is a sucker for baby and doesn't give a fuck about how cringe it is, she is cringe and will never stop being. She calls Finnick angel because since they kissed for the first time, there was nothing more ethereal and unhumanly nice than the man she used to despise.

🩵Annie may not cook, but she is a fire bartender.

🩵Finnick once stole a cigarette from Annie and will never tell her because she would make sure that he doesn't touch one again.

"Why can you do it then?"

"Because I'm fucked up and don't matter, I'm already way too far gone! I'm crazy! And you matter!"

"I'm far worse than you."

"Well I'm too far gone in loving you." She snaps the cigarette from his hand and takes a smoke.

[flipitkickit]

you know what. fuck it. *posts entire phony wip in here*

WC : 3628

@wabatle @sillynene-13 since yall like phony

Chapter One - 02/01/2XXX

Death Corps. Everyone feared the four knocks on the door. Four, the unlucky number. That's when the Death Corps recruiters would come, forcing you to join the army. Everyone had to join, starting at the age of 13. I think they started doing it because of the amount of wars that have been going on lately. They need more soldiers to defend our crappy country. There were two ways you could get out of serving in the Death Corps: if you had some serious disability or if you were filthy rich. If you paid enough money, you could avoid going for half a year. If you keep paying, when you turn 35, they stop caring. My parents have been using the payment method of saving my brother and I for the past few years, up until now. The four dreaded knocks. Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock.

I silently ran downstairs to overhear the conversation between my dad and the recruiter. The recruiter was a woman with blonde hair and dark brown roots. She had dark siren eyes and was dressed in an all black attire. She was utterly terrifying.

“Yes, Mr. Terry Black? We're here to enlist Mallory Poppy Black and Fitz Aster Black for their necessary Death Corps Service. We didn't receive any payment, and in the Death Corps Handbook, Section 37B it states if there is no payment to spare yourself from serving for a month, a Death Corps recruiter is obligated to come and take you or your children to training.”

“Recruiter, ma'am, we might've run out of money, but please don't do this to my kids. I'll pay double the amount next year.”

“I'm so sorry, Mr. Black. I cannot do that, I don't make the rules. I listen to the handbook. Can you please call them over?”

“Mallory, Fitz! Come down!” 

I went down first, my twin brother, Fitz, following shortly after. His face paled as he recognized the skull embroidered on the recruiters uniform.

“You're shitting me,” Fitz choked out.

“I'm so sorry,” My dad chanted as he squeezed us. “I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, please stay safe, my babies,” He was beginning to cry now. I bit the inside of my cheek, trying not to sob with him.

“Come with me, you two,” The recruiter ordered. Fitz and I followed her to her van. “Everyone in Death Corps has a code name. Mine is Guerilla. I am not telling you my real name, as per Death Corps Handbook section 1B. You two need to serve 18 months each.” She reapplied her cherry red lipstick before starting the van. “I'll be picking up more kids after. If any of you guys try to escape, you will suffer immediate consequences. What are they? You don't want to know.” 

“Guerilla scares me,” Fitz whispered.

“Real, if I have to serve in her regiment I don't know what I would do,” I whispered back. I couldn't shake the question off my brain, why can't she say her real name? Is it for privacy reasons? What if we did find her real name?

For those of you reading this story, sorry to interrupt, but I'm Mallory and I hate my life. My parents are divorced because they have absolutely no love for each other. The world is at a constant state of war. My twin brother is a weirdo. I probably won't get to eat mint chocolate chip ice cream for the next 18 months. But it could be worse?

The next person that boarded the van is some kid who looks our age. He was too busy crying to say anything about himself.

After that there was this one kid who just stared off into space for three minutes before talking. “My sister is in the Death Corps. I wonder how she's doing. She's almost done with her service.”

“What's her name, child?” Guerilla asked from the front seat.

“Eden. Eden Mendoza. I'm Wren, her little sibling,” The kid said. I could not tell the gender of that thing, and apparently, neither could anyone else.

“Oh, Himmel. Her left leg's been completely blown off I tell ya. Blood everywhere, it flew six or seven feet away from her, what a sight! But don't worry, she's doin’ better,” Guerilla informed. 

Fitz and I looked at each other, eyes both wide. The boy started crying harder. Wren's mouth was agape. “Her- Her leg was blown off??”

“Mhm, that's not even the worst I've witnessed on the battlefield. She uses a prosthetic leg now.” The fact Guerilla could say that with such a straight face shows how traumatizing serving for the Death Corps would be. I can't wait. (That's sarcasm, for those of you who are a little slow.)

After Guerilla collected all of the recruits, there were a total of eight people in the back of the van. Four boys, three girls, and one whatever the hell Wren was. The oldest in the van was a 21 year old man, the youngest was Wren, being 14 years old.

When we arrived at the camp, boy, was it crowded. There were varying expressions, from people trembling and crying to people being… excited to be here? You have a 51.6% death rate from serving in Death Corps, and you're excited? I wish I was that optimistic about dying. 

“Mallory, if I die, please hide my phone from Dad. One wrong click and he's going to bring me back from the dead and kill me again,” Fitz told me. I wonder how he'd feel knowing two years after he said that, I went through his phone and found out exactly why he said that.

“Same goes with me. If Dad found the drawings in my sketchbook, I'm done for.” I've never gotten along with Fitz well, but I guess it's easier to talk with someone when you're both in a life-or-death situation.

A loud siren came from way up front and a man who appeared to be around his mid-30's stepped up on the podium. “Welcome all Death Corps recruits. I am Eifrit, the current General of Death Corps. You are all gathered here today to serve your required 18 month term. You will undergo training and testing to decide which subunit is the most fitting for you. We wish the best for you, and as our founder would say, ‘Experiri non mori.’ Thank you.”

I think I'm going to start writing my suicide note. Death Corps, you guys can get a special shout out.

Chapter Two - 02/01/2XXX

“Alright, everyone from van SK431 come to this side! I will be doing a fitness test to see if you are fit to be in battle. I will be doing this with the aid of my helper, Andromeda. Introduce yourself, Andromeda!” Guerilla announced.

Andromeda was slightly shorter than Guerilla and had a nose piercing, a mole above her lips, split dyed black and white hair, and purple eyes that seemed as if they lost the glimmer in them a long time ago. “Hello trainees, my name is Andromeda, as Guerilla said, and I serve as a medic in the Death Corps. I will be doing a full body examination, and then we will run some exercises to test your stamina, dexterity, and strength. Any questions before we begin?”

“Ew a full body exam?? Are we going to like, have to strip naked or something?” Some ugly boy exclaims. He was one of the guys that were excited to be here.

“I don't want to see your small dick either, buddy. I have to do this, unfortunately.” Most of the group burst into laughter as whoever that guy was tried to come up with a comeback.

“Oh yeah? Well I bet um… Um… I bet you uh… You smell bad?!” That was the worst attempt at an insult I've ever seen.

Andromeda ignored his statement and moved onto the actual inspections. Fitz went first in a dingy tent with a caduceus on the front. He came back ten minutes later traumatized.

This part is icky and I'm sure you don't want to read it so I'll skip to the part after the whole medical exams. There were person shaped targets lined up and we were each handed a pistol. 

“You all have to shoot the targets. You get two tries, we'll be looking for people that have great accuracy,” Guerilla explained. “You kid, you're up first.”

Wren closed an eye and got into shooting position. The bullet hit a perfect bullseye.

“How did you do it? It was probably just a lucky shot!” A guy shouted.

“I'm used to shooting, my parents taught me when I was younger to prepare me for this. I prefer sniping more, though,” Wren said.

“You're hella good kid, shoot again?” Guerilla rested an arm on their shoulder. They nodded before getting back into position and shooting again, this time a little off from the bullseye. Guerilla wrote something down on a paper and let the weird guy– who's name I later learned was Lawrence– shoot. He used both his shots immediately and just barely hit the target. Guess we know who isn't going to be a shooter. Fitz was after two other people, and he did average. He hit pretty close to the bullseye the first time, and hit somewhere on the outer edges on the second try. I went last, and I had a stunning realization: I need glasses. And I need to find out which eye was my dominant eye. 

“Loser,” Fitz snickered. I elbowed him.

“This is why you're the one that was an accident,” I retorted. He didn't say anything back.

“Next up is close combat! Since there are eight people gathered here, we'll do this tournament style!” Guerilla seemed a little too enthusiastic to watch people fight each other.

First match was some random girl against Fitz. I'm not sure if pitting a girl against a boy is a good idea but equal rights, equal fights. The other recruits, Guerilla, and I watched as Fitz and the girl threw punches at each other. Fitz landed a punch on her nose, and I think something in that girl snapped because she kicked him right where it hurts the most. Everyone felt the pain Fitz felt as he fell to the ground with a groan.

“I win!” The girl smiled. She held her hand out to help Fitz up, but he swatted it away.

“I'm in extreme pain, I don't think I can get up yet,” Fitz groaned. Who's the loser now?”

“I know you can do it, Fitz. Get up if you want to survive,” Guerilla walked towards him and slightly nudged him with her foot. He got up immediately and stood right next to me.

I let him rest his arm on my shoulder as the next match started. It was Wren versus the 21 year old. Okay, these matches are getting a bit unfair now, aren't they? Wren probably just started going through puberty and they're fighting someone who's old enough to drink? The match started with Wren charging directly at the man, and the man retaliated by body slamming Wren on the floor. The thud was loud, but the silence after Wren's eyes closed was louder. 

“That was a child? You could've gone easier on the thing!” Guerilla squatted to feel Wren's pulse. “They're still alive, I'll go call Andromeda. You shouldn't have done that during training, but I like your attitude, man. You better show the same strength on the battlefield, soldier. I'll be back soon. Mallory, you look after everyone.”

The sound of Guerilla's boots hitting the ground decrescendoed as she left the training site. The man looked down on the floor where Wren laid and sat down. “Damn,” He said.

Damn indeed. 

Guerilla returned with Andromeda, who came to pick Wren up, with another girl by her side. She had the same chocolate eyes and facial structure as Wren. The doctor's coat and skirt were long, but not enough to cover the prosthetic leg she had. Was she Himmel? 

“Wren has a minor concussion, but they'll be fine with a little rest. When they wake up, tell them big sis says hi.” Himmel patted their hair before getting up. “Andromeda will supply the medicine to quicken recovery.”

“Thank you, Himmel. I'll tell you when the kid wakes up again.” Guerilla seemed like a genuinely nice person outside of the battlefield. “In the meantime, let's have our third match. Mallory versus Lewis.”

Lewis was the kid that was crying the whole trip here. When the match started, he stood and waited for me to attack. I was about to do the same until I realized that it was a pussy move. So I kicked his shins hard. He fell to the floor immediately and begged for mercy. I think what happened to Wren scared him.

“Mallory wins… I guess. I don't think that counts as much of a win, but great job?” Guerilla stared at Lewis with a pitiful expression. “I don't know what I'm going to do with you. Alright, fourth match starts in a minute!”

“You only won because Lewis is weak. If you went against anyone else, you'd lose,” Fitz told me. 

“You're not wrong.” I weigh 100 pounds and I am 5’6, of course I would lose against anyone that wasn't Lewis.

The fourth match was Lawrence versus a girl. These people need to say their names. I'm going to confuse the readers by saying “this girl” or “this guy” for the millionth time. I should use adjectives to make it a little easier to differentiate. Pink haired girl. That works.

Back to the story, I watched Lawrence win against the pink haired girl, but she put up a pretty strong fight. She seems normal, unlike Lawrence. She was crying a little in the van, but now she looks like she's just accepted her fate. Girl same. 

“What a fight, huh? Most of you guys did great. After Wren wakes up, we'll do an obstacle course,” Guerilla declared. An obstacle course doesn't sound too bad. I'm pretty quick, I have experience. By experience I mean running away from my brother after I eat the last piece of cake. But I'm sure it won't be that bad, right?

Right?

Chapter Three - 02/01/2XXX

I was wrong. It was that bad.

Wren woke up 30 minutes later after Andromeda and Himmel visited, confused. Hope they didn't get amnesia. Guerilla gave them some of the pain medication, but other than the confusion they seemed alright. 

“Sorry for knocking you out and giving you a concussion or something,” Wren's opponent apologized.

“It's okay. Maybe. I understand why you did that, I would've done the same.” Wren forced a smile. Really shitty apology, but good on them for accepting(?) it.

“Okay, now that Wren is back, it's time for the obstacle course. I'm tired of explaining so this should make sense. Y'all have seen obstacle courses before. Coming back in one piece is optional, I'll tell Andromeda to wait at the end and I'll stay here and make sure none of you losers cheat.” Guerilla does not get paid enough to deal with us and I feel her. 

It started with loser boy Lewis tripping and falling face first on the mud. I- along with many others- ran over him. Sorry Lewis. We had to jump hurdles, which almost led to my downfall. After that, it was climbing a cliff and landing the jump on a mattress. 

You get what happens during obstacle courses. I was neck to neck with pink haired girl for most of it until the final stretch, where I made it first. Fitz was third and Wren was behind him. Lewis was last, as always. This boy is a true example of a loser, Fitz, not me.

Guerilla decided to give us a break before starting an… intelligence test? Lawrence failed, as expected. Zero questions right, how does that happen? Fitz got half the questions right. I got 80%, good for me. Wren got one more question right than I did. I got outscored by a 14 year old. I need to evaluate my life choices.

“Folks, since we've completed all the tests, y'all get a break and tomorrow morning we have an assembly. There, you will get sorted into groups based on your performance today. I'm going to drink until I pass out, don't disturb me, your dorms are over there.” Guerilla pointed to a rundown shack. 

I only had one word when I walked in. Gross. Even my brother's underwear doesn't smell as bad as this place.

When I stepped in, it smelled like literal ass. There were four bunk beds, so I played safe and got a bunk above Fitz. The shower was freezing, but it felt refreshing to be able to shower. 

“Guys, appear normal. The troop leaders are doing a check on every training regiment and I want a raise. If you're on your best behavior, I'll let you sleep in an extra five minutes.” Guerilla entered our shack 45 minutes later when most of us were all freshened up. 

Waiting didn't take too long, because it was only two minutes after Guerilla announced a troop leader was arriving when one actually did.

Dear readers, I don't usually find anyone that attractive. But this troop leader? God damn, when I tell you she was fine! She had light blue hair that went to her lower back, a scar that started from her nose to above her right eye, electric blue eyes, and a tank top that revealed her arm muscles. She had a black cap sporting the Death Corps emblem on too. She looked scary in a different way than Guerilla did.

“This the training regiment from van SK431, correct? May I see the results of the tests?” She inquired. “To those who don't know me, my name is Lupus. I'm troop leader 172. Some of you guys might be in my troop, depending on your scores.” Please Lord let that be me. “Hey, Guerilla. This year we have a lot of interesting candidates, hm?”

“Yup,” Guerilla agreed, passing Lupus the papers with our scores, “Sirens little cousin is here, right? Van AE382? I recall working with Siren. Cool guy.”

“Mhm. He was a beast on the battlefield. Let's pray his little cousin is like that.” Even I have heard of Siren. One of the Death Corps best recruits. He killed a bunch of people and showed zero remorse. He left after his term was up, however. The top generals would pay him millions if it meant he would come back. If his cousin was coming here, maybe they would be just as badass as Siren.

Lupus examined the papers, eyes widening at some. “You have some good recruits, Guerilla, but…” Lupus whispered the second part to Guerilla.

“Mmm, we're probably going to put ‘im in the clean-up crew. Scores are underwhelming compared to everyone else in the group.” Of course they're talking about Lewis. The same Lewis who was, for some reason, fast asleep. For context, it was 5:21 pm. 

Lupus and Guerilla chatted about tomorrow and sorting us into troops. I also heard something about code names. The code names they suggested for me before they actually chose my current one were bad. If I had to tell people my name was Speedy I would leave Death Corps even if it meant they would hunt me down. I'll reveal what my code name was at a later point. For now, back to Lupus.

She left our shack, taking the papers to the higher ranks. Guerilla praised us and told us we were good little children for behaving and we would get our 5 minutes of extra sleep. Are we going to have our lesson on coloring in the lines next? Are we going to learn the alphabet? Guerilla was only three years older than the oldest person in our training regiment, so her treating us like kindergarteners doesn't make much sense.

The rest of the day was pretty eh. It was just me doodling in my sketchbook and talking to the only two people I was okay with talking to.

Lights out came shortly after I had finished one of my drawings. I can barely fall asleep on normal days, so of course me being on a bed that felt like a brick made it even worse. The next day we would finally figure out who would go where for extra training based on our strengths and weaknesses. I was going to be separated from Fitz and Wren. I was going to be in a war that changed everything.

Chapter Three Point Five - Why am I Here??

I should interrupt the story with some Death Corps lore. It all started with the war for more land. Humans are selfish beings, they always want more than what they have. they were willing to do anything for some land that was discovered. That land also happened to have a bunch of resources and riches, so that made the wars much worse. The war has been going on for just about a decade now. Every army is different, but in the country I'm in, it has the infamous Death Corps. Death Corps was founded by two siblings, Shams and Qamar. Their real names are unknown, but it was founded just before the war started. At first, it was just recruiting whoever wanted to join and whoever was strong enough. Then, they started getting desperate. They needed more support. They let in whoever wanted to join. The conditions worsened, and they had to resort to forcing everyone to serve in the army.

[tia-amorosa]

Episode 13: First concerns?

The next morning. It's just after 9:30 a.m. when Beau comes home after driving Emily to school and doing a few small things. The girl didn't want to take the school bus there on the first day. When he came in the door, he saw his wife sitting on the sofa. But she seemed slightly absent. “Victoria, is everything all right?”.

When he turned his gaze to the same spot where his wife was looking, he gradually understood why she was so quiet at the moment. “You did… Didn't we want to do this together?”. She looked up at him, no further expression on her face. “I know… I'm sorry, I was… Just terribly curious… Beau”. Her voice sounded taken. “What, is something wrong?”.

When he realized how nervous she was, he sat down next to her. “What are they writing? Have we brought a ticking time bomb into our house or…"/ „Oh God, no“ she laughed a little for a moment. But then she immediately became serious again. “That poor girl has been through so much in her young life, it's unbelievable.” Beau took a quick look at the many sheets of paper lying on the table, then looked back at his wife. “Okay, let's talk about it”.

Victoria also looked over all the sheets of paper she had spread out on the table and collected her thoughts once again. “Well, I… I don't know where to start. Well, when she was born, her mother was heavily addicted to drugs, and had probably been for some time. The little one was born with severe withdrawal symptoms. Also… babies born to drug-addicted mothers often have severe malformations of the brain or heart”.

“does Emily have…"/ ”such birth defects? No, that's the amazing thing. Despite her mother's severe addiction, she's perfectly healthy. It's just that the withdrawal symptoms must have been very severe. That's actually bordering on a miracle. “ Victoria gestured excitedly with her hands. / “And what about her mother now?”

Victoria leaned back a little on the sofa. “The letter said that she wouldn't have been able to look after Emily due to her severe addiction. She have tried rehab several times, but always relapsed. The drugs were probably more important to this woman than her own child"/ ‘I think … once you've been heavily addicted, you can't get away from it’.

“Hh, yes. Her mother took her own life about a year after Emily was born. We don't know anything about the father."/ ‘And what about the rest of the family?’/ ”They all had some kind of problem and didn't want to take the little one into their care. She was very difficult in the first two years, cried a lot and had tantrums”.

“In the end, someone in her family decided to give Emily up for adoption. “/ “So she's not an orphan, she's just…”/ “Unwanted. Then she was with different foster families, for different lengths of time. But she didn't feel particularly at home anywhere. The whole thing went on for almost 5 years”.

“So they decided to put her in an orphanage. She was there for 4 years"/ ‘that must have been terrible for her’/ ”Well, not so much, according to the reports. She seems to have developed very well, she's very intelligent, inquisitive… And she's been examined a lot to see if she might have any developmental disorders. Hn, now i understand why she doesn't like doctors very much.“.

“I would have that too if they kept sending me to them to get checked out. At some point you no longer have any trust…"/ ”Mhm. Well, anyway, there have often been encounters with potential adoptive parents who would have liked to take her. But she really has a mind of her own. “/ “Sounds familiar, hn,” Beau said with a deep laugh.

The two were silent for a moment. Until Victoria turned to her husband. “Do you think she chose us for any particular reason?"/ ”Who knows. And if she did, then of course I hope it was for a good reason.” She looked down at her hands for a moment. “I've had a good feeling about her so far, Beau. I'm just… A little scared“/”of what?”.

She looked her husband in the eye again and her voice became a little softer. “She's still so innocent, Beau and I… I don't want her to go off the rails one day… Like her mother"/ ”Hey, it doesn't have to happen again, okay? We'll teach her the right values and teach her what's good and what's bad. And I'm sure she'll know a lot of things for herself and find out for herself”.

“Don't worry about it. I have a lot of contact with other parents through my work and we still have our friends. So if we ever need help, we're not alone…”. Victoria held his hand tightly in hers. “You're right. We can do this together. I can't wait to see how her first school day goes"/ ‘I'm sure she'll tell you about that later’. She smiled and gave her husband a kiss. “I'm going to put the papers away now. That's Emily's past. Let's concentrate on the future now.” He nodded at her. They had a big responsibility now and knew how to deal with the situation.

---------------------------------------------------------

@greenplumbboblover , @solorisims , @plumbobgothica ⭐

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #403

Ohhh, today's letter to you is being written very late. It is currently 2am as I write this. Goodness me.

This morning, J awoke me sometime around 4am; he had intended to go out in his plane and land on an ice runway upon some lake. The ice itself was some 13 inches deep, and so it was plenty sturdy enough to support a number of airplanes upon it. Naturally, I was worried about him doing a thing he had never done before (especially since the crash...). But... I can't stop him from trying new things or pursuing what he's passionate about. I can express my discomfort and make suggestions, but at the end of the day, he has to be free to choose what is right for him.

He took a number of beautiful pictures along the way, too; here:

I went back to bed until 8am; today is Saturday (I know it's technically Sunday, but I've not slept yet, so...), so I was scheduled to work at the bakery. I got these pictures of birds on the sign out front as I walked in:

Given what I wrote about on Thursday, I was a bit on edge despite my best efforts. So I sang a lot to try to make sure my brain doesn't allocate too many resources to my amygdala; one of the best ways to stop a flashback in its tracks is to prevent it from happening in the first place, and if you're using too many areas of your brain at once (such as one does when singing), there's not enough RAM leftover in your brain for your amygdala to take over and mess up all your shit.

Singing is by far my best defense against flashbacks. More people should do it. You should try it, too.

I got a number of things done, but once again, I was a little too busy to have any chances to take yummy pictures for you. You've got my sincerest apologies.

A thing happened today though that made me really glad that I suspended judgment on the new manager (he's called Dy), despite the initial impression I had of him. First impressions are often the least accurate, and I know what it is to have people judge me based on their first impression of me, and... it's not good. I like to think that on a good day, I'm pretty okay at gathering more data before jumping wholly upon some weird conclusion. I like to think I'm pretty okay at charting out potential trajectories instead of definitively settling upon one as though that is objectively what reality is.

He came into my department today to talk to Tr. And to my surprise, he talked to me, too. And he asked me how I am doing. I hesitated a moment before asking him permission to speak freely. And he granted me that permission, so... I basically told him everything I told you on Thursday. I told him that although ordinarily I am kind and loyal and willing to do anything, and that I am more than happy to sweep a floor anytime, the fact that he gestured in ways that were impossible for me to understand because he had not invested time and energy into building mutual vocabulary or understanding with me, or even into learning my name, left me feeling afraid that he thinks of me as nothing more than a clicker-trained animal. And so, I said that if he wants to be able to use gestures like that to communicate with me, he has to build that vocabulary with me first.

...And he listened. He didn't get angry. And he seemed... appreciative of the fact that I stated what I was thinking in a very precise, matter-of-fact, and non-sugarcoated way. I was surprised at this. I have lots of experience with people in leadership positions feeling the need to be king of their little anthills, so to speak, and getting very upset whenever anyone dares say or do or think or feel anything that they don't like. I'm relieved to come to the understanding that Dy is not such a person.

...Good grief, but maybe I've worked a little too long in a tech field... and spent too much time around abusive adult overlords as a child. Today's events around this is simply more proof that I've got more learning and growing to do. But that's all right; we're humans. And the only humans who don't have learning and growing to do are dead ones.

...As it turns out, the gesture was intended for Tr, who, at the time, was directly behind me without me knowing. Tr, with whom Dy had spent a little time building that mutual vocabulary so that she could understand his meaning. I suddenly felt very silly, because, once again, to literally no one's surprise, my brain had worked itself up into a worried tizzy, coming up with possible explanations for a non-issue.

...If you've been reading my letters up until this point, I'm sure you're not surprised at all, either.

In the end, Dy and I came away from the interaction feeling warm towards each other and each of us having a better understanding of the other. I got to give him one of the kiwi-flavored gummies that I got from Mitsuwa, and that made me very happy.

I'm looking forward to future interactions with Dy. I'm going to miss Jo, but... I think Dy will be nice to work with, too.

I went home after that. Su dropped by to help me apply for two state jobs. I now have an understanding of the formatting they're looking for, and the minor details of the process (it varies from employer to employer... sigh...). I sent out applications for two positions – one that focuses more on writing, and another that focuses on both writing and a little programming. I'll probably send out more in the coming days. Here's hoping that they could use someone with my set of skills.

M and I went to go visit R's house after that; An from work was unable to come with us because his duties at the grocery store left him too tired and worn out, which is certainly understandable. There will be other opportunities for him to join us in the future, if he so wishes!

R's brother and his brother's girlfriend (V) arrived shortly after M and I did. R put together a beautiful platter full of snacks for us! Check it out!!

I continued working on my silly crafting project as V and I talked at length about a variety of topics relating to trauma, psychology, and the kinds of coping mechanisms people develop in response to various forms of adversity. M didn't stay for very long because his social battery drains quickly. But J arrived shortly after M left, and the conversation picked up right where it left off.

R made bibimbap in the meantime. I helped a little by chopping the carrots and cucumbers. Here were the results:

I did most of the dishes in R's sink shortly after that; the new exercises K gave me seem to be really helping the things connected to my messed-up rib; it's been a while since last my body has felt this good.

...I wonder what tomorrow will bring. I suppose I should go to sleep so I can find out; it's going on 3am anyways.

I am messy and imperfect and still learning, but I love you. I hope you can look at me and at the person I'm becoming as I write these letters to you every day, and see someone whose efforts to be better today than yesterday count for something.

...Sephiroth, no matter how far you fall down, you, too, can try really hard to make better choices and think kinder thoughts today than yesterday. Anyone can. They can do this work. And indeed, everyone is responsible for doing this work upon themselves. The best way to become strong is to become soft enough to be vulnerable while still setting boundaries that acknowledge and respect both others' and your own humanity.

Let's keep trying together, okay?

I'll wish you good night for now. Please stay safe out there so you can read tomorrow's letter.

Your friend, Lumine

[thedarkestgreys]

tagged by both @stannisfactions and @theangrypomeranian 🖤🖤 thank you friends!

How many works do you have on AO3?

67 but something new is popping up for halloween

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

so it says 976,114 but 266,429 of those words are from @baratheonbrotherspresent group written co-op fics

3. What fandoms do you write for?

primarily Fexi/Euphoria right now. but i've also written fics for ASOIAF/GoT, Eternals, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, and Teen Wolf over the last near decade.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

your violent overnight rush (fexi) stages (jonsa) and i'll do anything you say (if you say it with your hands) (drukkari) slow hands (drukkari) and then a fic that i currently have hidden 😅

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

always! even if it's a quick TYSM FOR READING. i always appreciate when readers take the time to leave a comment, and i want to show my love back.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i don't think i've written anything with an angsty ending tbh. yes, lots of angst in various fics, but i'm a happy ending girlie through and through.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

as stated above, im a happy ending girlie. but maybe my heart's gone double time if i had to choose.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i haven't in a long time, but in the past yeah. like drove me away from a ship and shut down my interest in writing for like a solid year. it wasn't even about the writing, it was about the plot (a Sweet Home Alabama AU) and the comments were unnecessary (go read the wiki on the movie yall its not hard) and it just sucked lol. that was a hot minute ago though. we're good now.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

hahahaha do i write smut???? i have an internal checklist of all the smutty things i haven't written yet that i want to give a go, so you could say that. (note: daddy kink is off the list and never to be seen from me again)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

i do not! but i like to write a lot of AU's of different media.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

as far as i know of, no i haven't.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i've had some offers in the past to have things translated back in the GoT days but i never gave the okay on it simply because it was a fic i never completed (ya girl used to get in over her head)

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

technically the BBP fics are cowritten but we all did our own chapters following a basic outline of plot/storylines and worked around what other authors were posting. it was chaos and hilarious and the most fun i've ever had

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

to write for? i'd have to say it's fexi, they unlocked a new level in my brain as an author. shout out to my favorite non-canon little crackship that could podrya though - i'll love you forever. to read? this is like asking someone to pick their favorite child. i've read so many incredible fics across a ton of different fandoms. but god i guess the ones i still seek out frequently is dasey and dramione. wouldn't say i have a favorite though?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

i really want to finish but the wolves came and went and i think i'm sitting on at least two chapters completed for it right now lol someday i'll sit down and finish writing the whole thing and get it posted.

16. What are your writing strengths?

plotting. world building. exposition. keeping characters in character. i've been told i'm good at writing big emotions too?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i've improved greatly but i still struggle with dialogue. 🙃

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

okay so. when i was writing slow hands as i got further into the story i really started describing the actual sign language being used by makkari and druig. hours of watching asl videos to pick out different words or phrases to translate. it was fun and it was hard work and i ended up with a whole new appreciation for asl. but it also felt important to really dig into describing the asl and i'm glad i did it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? ... and i'm still bitter about the cancelled reboot.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

taking yvor out of the equation: my fexi warm bodies zombie au sharing different heartbeats mostly i go back and read it and go "wait i wrote this?" because i don't do zombies at all lol. i'm just very proud of it.

tagging: @sarahcakes613 @muserepeats @calculated2stagger @iwantthemtostay and @idontneedtobeforgiven

[concernedbrownbread]

For the character asks: Arslan Senki(i hope i got the name right)

Thanks for the ask!! Since there's no number, I'll just pic a few. Be warned, I ADORE THIS BOY. He's my precious bean, my cinnamon roll that could kill, my sassy child, etc. Literally tempted to answer every single on of the question but I'll try to limit it.

1.My first impression of them: no cap, he's the reason I picked up this show. So, I went into it with the anime (mistake, I know, the manga is definately better, but the anime isn't too bad). The first episode AND first chapter of the manga made him very likable for me: he was a sheltered kid with a good heart and very few friends. I was excited to see how he'd grow. I think the opening was perfect: setting up the world and some of the main conflicts, introducing out main character and his personal conflicts, setting up one of the main antagonists, etc etc etc. Love it. Love him.

7. A quote of them that you remember: "Narsus, I will appoint you court painter."

Reasons I love this quote:

biggest brain thing anyone in the series has every done (including every Narsus strategy)

said with charisma points MAXED out

never let them know your next move

12. Sexuality hc! Aroace. I accept literally nothing else.

13. Your favorite friendship they have: Etoile and Arslan's frienship makes me want to c r y. They are so good together, perfect foils to each other. They're the only one that treats Arslan like anyone else and not a prince: granted, they are pretty brash and mean but Arslan needs someone to not be all soft-spoken around him. I just want a scene where Arslan snaps and Etoile is all smug like HAH! GOT YOU TO STOP BEING THE PERFECT PRINCE! Etoile also challenges Arslan ideologically from the FIRST chapter , and every single encounter since has changed Arslan and left a mark on him. I love all Arslan friends, but I always feel like there is a divide due to the status. Arslan is a prince: of course he must adhere to the status quo. Etoile tho? They spit at the status quo. And then probaby spit at Arslan too for the fun of it. God I love them.

Also, I have a fic in my head where Etoile stayed a slave for a while so they and Arslan had a deeper relationship before they escaped.

(Also also, I like the idea of queerplatonic Etoile and Arslan.)

Also, Etoile gives Arslan this moment:

ID: two panels from the Arslan Senki manga, read from right to left. In the first panel, Arslan and Etoile are falling, the sun is setting in the distance and there are clouds and mountains framing the scene. Next panel is a zoom into Arslan, the sun reflecting in his eyes. END ID

Other than Etoile, his relationship with Daryun is amazing. I don't really call it friendship though, I call it overprotective-dad-and-his-trouble-magnet-son.

16. A childhood headcanon: he was a super mischevious child growing up and it drove his guardians up the wall (but they loved him, everyone loved him, how can they not?)

21. When do you think they were at their happiest? I'm sure that Arslan has a lot of happy moments with his friends in the events of the manga, but I genuinely believe he was the happiest before he came to the castle. When he speaks of his childhood, he seems incredibly fond. To me, Arslan never struck me as particularily ambitious. He wants to be a good prince for his people out of the goodness of his heart, but being prince was not something he wanted. I feel that he hates the divide between himself and others that his status brings. I think he was happiest when he had not real status and was allowed to play with his peers without filters.

Thanks again for the ask! Have a wonderful day!

[mav-doodles]

I’m late to the party but can I ask what the lore is for the uranium nuzlocke au,, uranium invaded my brain and I need content or I will explode/j

Of course! I have a handful of junk for it, and some stuff is not set in stone. I hope you're reading for a WALL of rambles.

Essentially, it starts with the change that Pluto's 'starter' isn't one of the usual three. Pluto decided to befriend an, at the time, unknown machine-like Pokémon who was nicknamed Digit. In time, it'd become known that Digi was a prototype Urayne.

Digit's deal, as of right now, is they were created as a testing ground for how Urayne would eventually work. Digit has become incredibly wary of humans, not fond of how they treat them. They broke out of the lab, vanishing for years. In time, they were found by the Professor, and with some convincing, went back to the lab with them. they became a sort of... Assistant.

Now, that aside, consider almost everything playing out normally... Up until the Championship.

Pluto and their team were overwhelmed by Gamma Urayne, and as a result, lost. Tandor was sent into a Nuclear Winter, and the remaining residents formed camps and groups that began to live either underground, or in well protected cities (Like Bealbeach).

CURIE has earned herself the title of Apocalypse, due to her overall success, and is a CONSTANT threat to the survivors. Apocalypse has upgraded her radiation suit to be a bit more durable, and beneath is a bodysuit that's modified with tech that utilizes that of the stasis tanks. Her body is being kept in a constant state of stasis as a result, where she has no need to eat, rest, and won't age. In short, so long as the tech is functional, she will not die. It, however, does not protect from outward damages.

Pluto, post-Championship, resides between one of the underground camps, and Zeta itself alongside Apocalypse. After learning more about her- specifically, who she is, as well as slowly coming to agree with her views on humanity itself, Pluto's sort of sided with her. Pluto's role had shift from preforming expeditions for resources and information for the survivor party, to gathering intel that Apocalypse and Urayne can use to further their destruction and elimination of people in Tandor.

Normally, Pluto wouldn't have sided with her at all, but they agree with the thoughts that humans are very greedy, and tend to not care for some unless it benefits them directly. Which, unfortunately, is true in both of their cases. Their original relationship is a sort of "you do this for me, I do this for you" Sort of deal, where Pluto do what she requests, and in turn, Pluto is kept safe from the wild Nuclear Pokémon, and gets to reside in Zeta where it's a bit safer.

Pluto is seen by the remainder of the survivors as THE person to deal with Apocalypse, and they all held this 13 y/o in high regard. Pluto's a child- they don't NEED all these responsibilities and praise on their shoulders. They never asked to be called a 'hero' or 'savior'. They're just... Tired. They already have enough trauma and self doubt to deal with.

Over time, Apocalypse and Pluto shift more toward a sort of... family relationship. Apocalypse cares for them like they're her own child- but these feelings partially come from the buried memories from what used to be Lucille. It's a feeling of "I don't know WHY, exactly, but you mean something to me." Kellyn plays a minor role in it all too- acting more as a neutral party, especially after learning who Apocalypse was. He's determined to try and convince her to cease her destruction, and get her to understand that things aren't... What she thinks they are. Granted, she is very far gone, with little room to change her mind. But it is possible. He also just missed his wife, lets be honest.

What happens past that point though can go into a couple directions, depending on the circumstances;

Pluto could remain with the survivors, and in time, Apocalypse is put down.

Pluto remains with Apocalypse, but Apocalypse's own overconfidence becomes her undoing. The result of this is she either dies, or is heavily wounded and has to be put into stasis just to keep her alive until a way to fix her can be found.

The latter results in Pluto snapping and taking over her place, finishing what she started. In time, Tandor would eventually be cleansed by the Hazma, and it'd be converted into a land for the Nuclear Pokémon, and some regular Pokémon, to roam without a fear in the world.

There's also a 'Good end', where the Championship fight ends differently. Pluto doesn't necessarily WIN, but they manage to convince CURIE just how wrong she is, manages to break through that wall of hers. Her own rage before Pluto breaks through overtakes Gamma Urayne, and throws them into an absolute FRENZY. They cause damages left and right while Digit tries to stop them. CURIE realizes her hate has hurt the one she's promised to take care of and protect. It breaks her. After casting the Interface aside, she does all she can to get Urayne to stop and calm down, almost getting herself killed in the process.

Afterward, she willingly answers for her crimes and aids in restoring Tandor.

Thank u for coming to my Ted Talk

[chronic-retrograde]

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Not really.

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

My partner.

03: Do you regret anything?

Loads of stuff.

04: Are you insecure?

Yes.

05: What is your relationship status?

Taken.

06: How do you want to die?

Instantly.

07: What did you last eat?

White Rabbit candies. Milk flavored.

08: Played any sports?

When I was a child, I played soccer very briefly.

09: Do you bite your nails?

Not unless there's a piece coming off.

10: When was your last physical fight?

Never.

11: Do you like someone?

See above.

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

Yes.

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

Yes.

14: Do you miss someone?

Yes.

15: Have any pets?

One cat who I love dearly.

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

Tired. My brain isn't letting me sleep at the moment.

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

No.

18: Are you scared of spiders?

If they're big.

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

Yes.

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

My bedroom.

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

Hang out with my bestie and his partner.

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

No.

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

No.

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Biology. Just not the cellular kind.

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

Yes.

26: What are you craving right now?

Sleep.

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

I think so.

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

No.

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

Unfortunately.

30: What’s irritating you right now?

Being too hot to sleep.

31: Does somebody love you?

Yes.

32: What is your favourite color?

Black.

33: Do you have trust issues?

With certain people.

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

I don't remember the plot, but I think it was in a mall.

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

My partner.

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

No.

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

Forgive.

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

Idk, but it's alright.

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

20

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

As a very small child.

51: Favourite food?

A cheeseburger.

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

Technically? Yes. Is it Karma? No.

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

Went to the toilet. Exciting, I know.

54: Is cheating ever okay?

No.

55: Are you mean?

I don't think I am.

56: How many people have you fist fought?

057: Do you believe in true love?

Yes, but you have to work for it.

58: Favourite weather?

Warm, breezy, and overcast with the smell of a future rain.

59: Do you like the snow?

No.

60: Do you wanna get married?

Yes.

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

I hate it.

62: What makes you happy?

My cat. Spending time with my friends and partner. Good food. Fun games. Typical things.

63: Would you change your name?

No.

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

No. He's sleeping rn.

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

This would never happen. He doesn't swing that way.

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

Yes.

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

My partner.

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

My partner.

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

Yes, but it's not an instant thing. It comes with familiarity. See the true love question.

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

Yes.

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

[1-p-29]

My Brother, Ivo.

Ch. 3: Flashbacks

Definitely not my brain taking a long time with ideas. But enough of that, let's enjoy some happy fun-time angst together! 😋😝

Read Chapters 1 and 2 first if you haven't already!

Summary: Eggman and Carol both get flashbacks, not good ones either.

______________________________________________

Eggman attacks, Carol watches, etc.

It's always been like that since Carol arrived to Hedgehog Village.

They both made a deal that Eggman would let her be and have a peaceful life here, minus the attacks, IF she watches his 'greatness' while doing it.

She agreed, nonetheless, but she knows she had to find something else to do around here.

So instead of watching him one day, she went to the library and found some pretty interesting books about different pop artists that visited here. She looked upon someone named Justin Beaver, who had, against his will, brainwashed everyone in the village with his singing. (The equipment was actually the one to blame, but oh well)

"sighs... If only I could go back in time... Those were the good ole days."

Meanwhile, during the fight, Eggman noticed Carol wasn't anywhere to be seen, which distracted him enough to be defeated by Sonic and his friends.

He decided to look for her, which took ALL DAY LONG (not really, he's just impatient)... until he finally found her in the library... reading.

"There you are, Missy, where were you..?"

Carol jumped up in her seat and said, "Oh, Ivo... it's just you... sorry for not watching you fight, I got a little bored and wanted to see what this library had."

"I kinda figured you for the reading type... damn, you've read a lot!"

"SHHHHH!!" Said the Librarian.

Ivo started whispering and said, "Apologies."

Carol, now whispering, gave Ivo a brief summary on each book she's read so far.

Ivo started to stare at her after a while.

'She acts just like Mom in a way...' he thought.

When she started describing the last book, however, it started bringing back some bad memories from his childhood.

It was a book about how a child lived with his sister and parents, but something terrible had happened to the sister. The mother then started drinking, scolding the child for little things like coughing or sneezing near her and the father kept grabbing the child and throwing him out to 'test his survival skills.' The mother eventually left and died in a car crash, since she still drank. The father on the other hand, started wreaking havoc in the small town they lived in. The father then abandoned the child when he was 13, leaving said child alone. The child grew up and ended up being just like his father. It was always someone else's fault, though. The other people made fun of and picked on him only because his last name was-

"Ok, ok... Th-That's enough... I-It's getting late... We should head home."

"But it's barely noon-"

"Don't care, come on, let's go to my place and hang out, I'm not planning on attacking anymore today, so let's go play video games all day, ok?"

"Ugh... fine."

"Yay."

As they got up to leave, so did someone else.

Amy heard them talking to each other, thinking about how suspicious they were being.

She follows them until she sees both humans hopping into the Egg Mobile.

Once it takes off, she sees them ride towards Eggman's lair.

"I gotta tell the others, she might not be as kind as she seems."

______________________________________________

-in the morning-

knock knock knock

"Coming!" 'Who the hell is knocking on my door this early!?" She thought.

She opens the door, revealing Sonic and his friends.

"Oh, it's you guys again... Come in."

After they all came in, she asked, "how have you been, young ones...?"

"We've been good, miss..." Said, Sonic. "Say... You and Eggman seem kinda close..."

"Is that right?"

"Yeah... we got kinda curious and asked around, and people all over town are saying how you stare at him while he attacks, with no fear of getting hurt."

"Yeah...? And what about you guys...?"

"Us?" Asked Tails. "What about us...?"

"Your opinions of me... I don't mind your company at the moment... do you mind being here...?"

They all stayed silent, even Knuckles.

"Let me ask each of you a different question... did you, Amy, mind my company when I joined you in the spa, rambling endlessly of when I used to sing about love, giving you advice in the process...?"

"... No, ma'am."

"And you, Knuckles... did you enjoy the cookies I made you once...?

"Ooh, Oooh!! I know this one!! The one with the cherry on top...!?" (Doesn't actually remember, typical Knux)

"No, dear, the one that had chocolate chips."

"Oh, yeah, right... I knew that!"

She laughed, admitting how much she loved how dorky he was.

"And you, Tails... did you enjoy the blanket I made you when it was your birthday...?"

"Yes, ma'am! I use it every night!"

"That's good to hear, dear... now you, Sticks... did you mind having lunch with me once while you were taking a break from fixing your traps...?"

"Depends... were you secretly sabotaging my traps while we were eating...? Are you a government spy...!? Do you have telekinesis!?"

Carol gets up and starts patting her head.

"You have such a creative mind, Sticks... you would've been a big help to the city I lived in... the traps thing, not the paranoia."

Stick's eyes start glistening, wondering if she should start getting out more... Only to talk to people, though, nothing else.

"Now, Sonic... you asked me once why I came here, and I said it was because I couldn't stay where I grew up because eventually, people might hurt me, correct?"

"That's correct."

"You gave me hope that this place was full of good people that I could trust, that I belong here more than where I came from... But now you come here, to my place, telling me that I'm suspicious..."

She took a deep breath, trying to hold in the tears.

"I'm going to come clean about being close with Eggman... but I hope your views of me don't change... and even if they did, I wouldn't care... it doesn't matter how much you hate me... do you know why...?"

They each made noises of confusion before shrugging.

"It's because I will always care about each and everyone of you... I can be a shoulder to lie on... Whoever needs a place to stay are welcome whenever they want... Just know that I care... That I want YOU to feel better when you're down... As long as I'm here... You can feel... Wanted..."

As Carol told them how she felt, she remembered a time where her mother told her that she could trust her, not knowing her true intentions of using her to try and steal things. She knew about false hope thanks to her... her stupid, drunken dead mother. She knew now that trust usually leads to disaster... To exile... To manipulation... To death. But she wasn't her mother... She knew she meant every word that came out of her mouth... But...

"I understand if you don't believe me... I wouldn't have trusted you if our roles were switched... we humans are so quick to lie... to hide... to run... but it really doesn't matter anymore... I don't care anymore..."

"Ma'am... we're sorry if we made you feel bad... but now that you told us how you feel... we... No... I figured you've been so honest with us, that it'd be better if we didn't worry about the whole 'Eggman' thing."

"Huh!?" The others were shocked. Sonic was being... RESPONSIBLE!?

"Let's go guys... we should go and relax! Until Eggman starts attacking again." They each agree and start making their way out the house.

After they left, Carol broke into tears of joy. They didn't care about her spending time with Eggman, which made her grateful.

Eggman visited soon afterwards, and they did what they'd normally do.

"I hope no one finds out that we're siblings... that would be disastrous." Eggman had pointed out.

"I really hope no one thinks we're a couple."

Eggman starts feeling queazy and says, "Yuck! No no no! That's so disgusting! 🤢"

They both started laughing after a few jokes and then they both decided to go to Eggman's lair to play some games.

Then they went to bed, then went back to their usual routine... but someone was watching them, observing their every move. Who you might ask...?

Well...

If you really want to know...

STAY TUNED

[zghostreviews]

The Arcane Review

I have not used this account in a long time but I feel like I need to yap a bit after Season 2.

Season 1, keeping it short and brief cause I don't have any real issues with it or anything. The animation and art style used in Arcane is beautiful and such, love that, very appealing to my eyes. The music used is......well it makes you remember this is based on LoL at least...I liked the intro song used and simply tolerated like 70 to 80% of the other music. I stayed firmly on the side of Zaunites throughout my S1 watch especially and barely cared for the Pilties except for maybe Mel but it was more of in a "why are you with a man who looks like he uses 7 in 1 body wash instead of your secretary who looks like she wants you" and the "your mom genuinely fucking sucks" sorta way. On the topic of Ambessa though, I CAN understand why people think she's hot but like I can't get over the whole warlord and genocider thing but anyways. I liked the first season, the pacing seemed great to me I thoroughly enjoyed it even though it has basically zero rewatchability for me.

Now Season 2, I actually have a lot to say about it since its fresher on my brain.

Dawg........Season 2 was kinda shit.....it makes sense why Fallout won over Arcane(even tho I think that it was a very missed opportunity NOT to have Maybe play when the bombs started dropping in Fallout the show) this time at the game awards(aside from S2 of Arcane JUST wrapping up close to the end of November) The pacing and writing felt off and everything felt incredibely rushed and I don't get it? They're making another Arcane series anyways so I dont get why they could have had three seasons instead of trying to mesh together two acts in one 8 episode season? Whoever made it standard that seasons for shows should be 13 episodes or less instead of at least 20, your mom's a hoe‼️

I'm gonna be real for a moment and say I was purely here for more Sevika content that was promised and they FUCKING LIED!! My wife don't even say a singular word in Act 3 aside from "GRAAHHH" LIKE WHAT. Like we still know basically absolutely nothing about her even though she was Silco's right hand and had to take care of Jinx and Isha.

And then the stuff with Cait??? Is just not really addressed???? Cause she went full on dictator and shit after her mom's funeral. That was all her own choice and I don't know why people keep saying "it's because of Ambessa" even though Ambessa literally hadn't even spoken to her yet during her initial crash out, the scuffed shit she was doing to Zaun citizens and pointing a gun at a literal child??? Cait made those decisions literally on her own dude.

Another thing bothering me that was just never addressed is how Ambessa literally had hired those Zaun people with the full intention of no one stopping them from assassinating Mel, HER DAUGHTER. Unless that was something her right hand staged without her knowing???? We don't know because that shit was never addressed afterwards and we can only assume that Mel learn that her mom or her mom's right hand was about to get her killed to make it seem like all of Zaun was evil either.

And the thing with Viktor was...something...he turned into Jesus and started going a bit crazy with power. My main thing with him is that...he is from Zaun, right? So wouldn't he know who Vander and/or Silco are in some way even if he only spent his childhood there?

And then there's the lesbian sex scene which I feel was just..........terribly placed.....? And the writing surrounding what leads up to it is weird too....? Throughout the entirety of Season 2, Cait....I literally like her less than I did in S1 cause she literally called Vi "one of the good ones" in S2 and that was fucking crazy. But Cait has had like zero sympathy of any kind for Jinx, even when Jinx was like super clearly wracked from trauma and grief from seeing, Isha, a child, a child that was in her care, die in front of her. Like I'm pretty sure Vi and Cait also witnessed that too....and the aftermath so you'd think she'd be at least a little bit sympathetic but no???? Unless I missed something????

Then afterwards when Vi arrives and does try to talk to Jinx about what happened, clearly it's still a fresh wound and she does NOT wanna talk about it due to how painful it is so she lashes out and locks Vi in the cell, and very clearly eludes that she's gonna go off and kill herself and no one is gonna stop her. And then sometime after that, Cait comes by and unlocks the cell and Vi is like "she really hasn't changed..." and its like huh?????? You JUST basically heard her say she'd gonna go off herself and THAT was your conclusion??? Even after the time you got to spend with her prior to the event inadvertently caused by Jayce??? Then Cait just kinda shit talks about Jinx to Vi and trying to reaffirm that "yeah girl! She hasnt changed and I told you so!" in between the comfort and then they start kissing and fucking in the jail cell Jinx had spent days starving herself and wallowing in her own grief and sorrows in.

I'm sorry but was that supposed to get my clit perking up????? Cause it didnt.

And then there's the Black Rose plot, which was just confusing and proves that Act 2 and 3 should've been their own seasons cause it just made everything even more messy and kind of hard to keep up with. Like...???? Question marks was all that was really cause it just provided more questions than there already were.

I thought the fish guy would be of importance cause of how many shots he was getting, the whole thing with Maddie, and that guy Vi was hanging out with that was giving Vander vibes, hell I even thought that one Jinxer would've been important in some way cause she got a few shots too. But nah, all of them just die with little to no fanfare except fish guy whose name was Stev or something, I dunno.

And then the montages were....also annoying to say the least? It seemed like more of an excuse to make a mini music video really.

Did I watch Season 2 all the way through? Yeah. At times it felt like a chore to actually get through it, but yeah.

But did I walk out of it perplexed? Also yes!

I rate season 2 like a 7.5/10

S1 gets like a 9/10

[scoops404]

ooo maybe longer fics?

In regards to this ask!

"i would love to hear more about your brainstorming process for creating a new fic / how you come up with so many great ideas and how that’s brought to life!"

Answer under cut:

Longer fics come about in several different ways, and usually the spark of the idea changes immensely from what I thought it was going to be versus what the final "product" ends up being. It very much helps the "fear of the blank page" if you accept upfront that the end product isn't going to be what you daydreamed about. I've learned that lesson. (AKA accept that you need to learn to love the journey more than the destination sometimes)

As far as what makes my brain go brrrrr that's gonna be a fic, it's different things. A big factor is if it's different and innovative or just strange enough that I feel like it hasn't been done *my way* before. I don't want to tell the same story someone else has already told. It's also a lot of time and energy to put into something, it needs to be able to hold me captive, let alone my interest. Hits Different is the best example of this -- i don't know what crack i was on but suddenly i had 100K+ written in like 2 months. That's insane for me. I had 8K writing days and 10K+ writing days. That's so so rare for me. And mind you, I did this with a 40 hours a week daytime job. I don't even remember the spark of the idea for Hits Different except that their parents got married and then they wound up in the same dorm room -- all the other stuff came after that.

I jsut went back to look for any tweets about HD:

Aug 13, 2023: "So you know how I can't write anything normal? What if I told you I just wrote 2k of college au step-brothers/ enemies-to-lovers with football player Dream. Would anyone want that? They're currently discussing safewords to fight each other"

Oh, so I guess it started as a college AU and Dream was a football player before the other stuff got added. This is before the weird BDSM part got introduced lol.

For Anagnorisis, the spark was "what if George was pregnant and didn't know it until he was in labor?" aka I didn't know i was pregnant AU -> which morphed into thinking, okay, why wouldn't he know? What would cause the most drama about that? and them sleeping together but not *being* together was the answer lol. I kinda live blogged the beginning thought process for that fic, including the first scene i wrote.

For Just One Touch, it started as the f/m/m to m/m DNF threesome fic because I love Midas Touch (RIP) so much and wanted to explore that dynamic myself. And then it was going to be VERY internalized homophobic based at the end and Alison wrangled me and it turned more demi-sexual exploration of George trying to figure out himself out. I wanted FWB and this is as close as I could get tbh haha.

For Shine Here To Us, it was a fic event in a discord where we spun a wheel with tropes we'd like to try and tropes we've done before and loved and mpreg and hurt/comfort were my results (shockingly the mpreg was the trope I hadn't tried up to that point). I always had an idea of two people in the spotlight having a baby together for convenience and then it turning into more so that was the impetus for this fic. I just couldn't imagine Dream stating he wants to have a child and George not trying to bend over backwards to be the one to give that to him (but, you know, in a cool way where he doesn't look lame)

For Curse and Cure of the Internet, I had the idea of Dream as a fic writer accidentally writing fic about himself and George. I wrote like 5K of it and then put it aside because I figured it was too out there and people wouldn't really relate like other fic writers would -- but then I mentioned it to someone on twitter and then everyone dogpiled saying they want to see that and so i fleshed it out. It became obvious very early on that the universe needed OCs of fans for Dream to befriend and then I had a very fun time making them as different as possible from each other, but still Dream fans. And that fic was my love letter to fandom friends and fanfiction writing (before some of the disillusionment set in so im glad i got it out there then!). People still to this day ask about Right Hand Man, the fictional fic that Dream writes in this universe and that makes me so happy.

For Deep in the Dream of a Game, I was coming off of writing Curse and Cure and wanted to write something completely different. Jase (birbwatcher) was writing an MCC fic set with realistic virtual reality and that fic had an amazing start (it's unfinished, sadly) and it reminded me of "Check Chat," one of the fics where the players are transported into the game. I remember loving that concept and thinking it was perfect for what it was but i wanted more romance to it and i wanted to see more of them having to build a society and not so much about the killing the dragon part. And the idea could have faded back out, but then I wondered what would happen if they killed the dragon and it didn't work. What would they do then? How would they cope? Then I just had to write it

I've Never Fallen From Quite This High started as the idea of George's mom coming to Florida and announcing her divorce from George's father. i had an IRL friend's parents get divorced while she's an adult and listening to her talk about how weird it was sparked something in my brain. It's not ilke you'll have two bedrooms and split custody as a 26 year old, but it's still weird to see them separated. And that combined with Dream being able to befriend anybody made the idea grow legs. I wrote it off and on and then the scene with dream and kate at the diner and how funny their banter was convinced me to write the rest of it and see it through. This one also had the idea that George just feels too much and he's scared of it sometimes. I still see elements of that in him.

You guys kinda saw the beginning of "I Am Two Fools" as well -- Dizzy handed me some prompts and then my mind got away from me and i knew it wouldn't be a quick fic for me. The hard part of planning and plotting for this one was from the twist of changing POV from Dream in the first half to George in the second half. Once I figured out i needed to do that, everything kinda fell into place.

I suppose the moment a fic changes over from an idea to something i'm determined to write is like the first time i write a scene for it. if it feels right and interesting and i'm excited about it, then i'll just keep going. Talking about it with my friends and here on my blog helps a lot too. It's amazing what other people's excitement for your thing does to your own enthusiasm.

This is already so fucking long, but i'd love to talk about shorter fics too at some point because a lot of those pack a punch of world building. Circling back, the mushroom king and the nightmare, florida man dub. Fun stuff!! Thanks for the ask. let me know if there's something more specific you were looking for

[mightbeautistic]

Hey so I have an autism assessment coming up soon (EEEEEE!) And I haven't told my family about it yet because I'm terrified of the whole "haha tiktok made her think she has autism look how silly she is" deal.

But the diagnostician will probably want to ask my parents some questions and I'm worried. Because like, I'll have to say "oh my parents have no idea that I am here and I don't want them to know."

Will that mess up the diagnostic process? Should I tell my family what's going on? Also I love your blog it's so deep-dive-able and validating and it makes brain go brrrrrrrrr

Aww thanks! I have no clue when this was sent so it might have already happened, but if not good luck!

Ngl I don't really know? From what I've researched, sometimes they interview family members, former teachers/coaches to get a good idea of what you were like as a child. From my understanding, it's a good support for the autism diagnosis bcs if you didn't show many signs for it before you were too old to mask, it might be a conglomerate of other mental issues instead. Maybe. Not a medical professional. Keep that in mind.

But also, parents can be biased about their children and may even answer contrary to the truth if they know what's going on(ngl I wouldn't bet against my parents doing that). For example, as I've heard from my sister(who is 13 years older than me), teachers had basically hinted at/suggested I get evaluated for ~something~ as a kid and my mom was just insistent that I was just a unique, gifted child with quirks, not some abnormal other thing.

But yeah I mean explain whatever the situation is to your evaluator person, and you're an adult. Your parents don't have to know at all. HIPAA, babey. (if you're American, at least)

Anyways, hope it goes well. If it already went, I hope it went well, and feel free to send me an update on how it was :)