#I don't know how many ways I can tell you those two have no chemistry

[astronomalyy]

Thinking about the lifespans of Dungeon Meshi elves... The fact that they're completely unnatural alters my brain chemistry, because you can tell just how haphazardly the demon implemented their wish. They live five times the length of tall-men, so they age at a fifth of their rate. It's simple maths and the implications are terrifying. No wonder their birth rate and population are declining - their early development is so slow that at the age of two, they're still unable to stand.

They don't reach adulthood until their eighties. What does the infant mortality look like? How many elves succumb to illness or injury before they're fully mature? It only takes one accident to lose the child you've been raising for decades - and could you bring yourself to care for another? Add to that the implication elf culture has no idea how to process grief... just look at the way the Canaries treat Rin after the death of her parents. They're callous and insensitive and detached - part of that's racism, but there's also an element of pure cold ignorance. They don't even recognise the emotion on her face.

And that's just scratching the surface... does elven memory accommodate their extended lifespan? Once you reach two hundred or so, do the years start blurring together? Kabru mentions that their temporal awareness is remarkably poor.

Two years feel like a few months. Their lives are longer but not fuller. They're older but not wiser than the short-lived races, and most refuse to understand this. Those that do grasp it are interesting - namely Otta, who's ostracised for pursuing half-foot women.

A 30-year old elf is a young child; a 30-year old half-foot has entered middle age. Otta is in the equivalent of her late twenties. She knows that her elven lifespan makes her no more mature than a half-foot - but she also acknowledges that it creates a rift between herself and her partners, and not just in the eyes of society. 'She dumps them as soon as they pass 30', but probably not for the reasons Lycion assumes. For this to be a pattern, decades must have passed - it's possible Otta doesn't want to watch them die as she herself barely ages. No doubt some of her previous lovers have already passed away. In the end, all living 400 years accomplishes is leaving them out of sync with the rest of humanity.

Marcille's perhaps the best example. As a half-elf, she's got 95% of her life ahead and the thought terrifies her. She's going to lose everyone she loves, over and over and over again, and this cycle has barely even started. She runs at a different pace. This context adds so much to her dynamic with Falin in earlier chapters.

Marcille loves her! She's scared for her! Maybe even of her! She's grown attached to a short-lived girl who she met as a kid when Marcille was a teaching assistant! Biologically and developmentally, they're the same age, but chronologically she's twice as old as Falin! Considering what happened to her mother, is history repeating itself? Her feelings towards Falin are tangled and messy and fascinating. They're also more than a little homoerotic, which makes Marcille's infantilization of her friend all the more interesting. It feels like her way of resolving their power imbalance, of remaining a responsible (former!) authority figure... but it's also a coping mechanism. She's frightened by the ways Falin is maturing and changing - aging - and keeping her mental image of her friend as young as possible is her way of denying the march of time that's destined to sever their bond.

Marcille's dream of lifespan extension would remove the need for this obfuscation, render them equal... only, they already are! This desire is imposed onto Falin, but it's primarily for Marcille's benefit. Watching her fight for a world nobody wants, for reasons both selfish and altruistic... it's as tragic as it is understandable. I love this manga.

[zyonsay]

Js came back from a mental health break to see ZYON REQS OPEN !!! How about a Loscar x male reader smut? I don't know if you write for Logan Sargeant since you don't have him in your list so— 😭 if not you can change the driver to Lando I don't mind, but the three of them are drunk and playing drunk truth or dare and things take a turn - 🔥

I dare you LN4&OP81

Fem aligned people may read but not f3tishize my work!!

Summary: A game of truth or dare between you, Lando and Oscar takes a turn...

Reader: Male

Warnings: Suggestive, NSFW, Dude-bro language, Horsegirl-ified reader because i said so

Now playing: 'Runway Walk' by Demrick

AN: Hey there! i FINALLY finished this and icl, not my best work. BUT i hope y'all can still enjoy this!

Loud chants echoed through the dimly lit bar. Your team members had picked you up and were now parading you around. The bar only had limited access to your equipe of elite show riders, a few close associates along with other familiar faces. Apparently, it was your lucky day, because your best friend finally had time to celebrate one of your many wins with you. Lando and yourself had been friends since diaper times and stuck together ever since. Even though you both were inseparable, your careers were demanding and didn’t offer you much time to hang out. He was now a rising F1 star, and you fought your way into prestigious show arenas, your schedules were now filled with training, media appointments and various other events. But, whenever you did find time to catch up, you always had a good time together. Not so recently he had introduced you to his teammate, and “friend”, Oscar. He’s a sweet guy, his smile felt like a little piece of sunshine and the swoop in his hair reminded you of gentle waves in the ocean. The chemistry between Lando and Oscar was kind of obvious, but you didn’t want to assume anything. That was until Lando had drunkenly admitted to his situationship.

The loud music boomed trough the doors as you stumbled out into the cold night air. Coordinating your wobbly legs while giggling uncontrollably was difficult. Very difficult. Lando had noticed your struggles and wrapped an arm around your waist while dragging you to the nearest bench. Maybe if you were sat, you wouldn’t fall on your face. A soft breeze blew trough the city and a slight shiver ran down your spine. It wasn’t actually cold, just refreshing enough. Lando had also sat down by now and leaned his head back while closing his eyes. Your gaze flickered to him, the street lanterns painted the contours of his face in orange hues. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was the poetic mood you’ve found yourself in, but now felt like the right time to tell him how you feel. You’ve always loved him, but you were also scared of telling him, or anyone for that matter. Besides. You two had very busy lives and barely got to see each other, so how would a relationship work out? But now wasn’t the time to worry about that. Not when he was looking so beautiful. How do you say this? How do you confess your feelings without sounding like an absolute idiot. Gathering all your courage, your lips parted, and the first word was ready to leave them. “Y/n. I gotta tell you something.”, his eyes were still closed, and his head was still leant back. A frustrated sigh fell from his figure, and he shifted his seat. Now he was looking at you, God, those beautiful eyes. They were so sincere and looked like a fresh margarita at the beach. “I- “, his gaze avoided your own for a second before his eyes darted up to yours again. “I think I might be into men. Like in a gay way.” That was the most bro-dude way to say that, but it sure suits him. A small smile crept onto your face. “Thanks for trusting me.”, you grabbed his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Coming out to anyone is difficult, especially when you can’t predict how they’ll react. This was worth a lot to you.

“…and I sort of have a thing going right now,” Shit. SHIT. What? If it is some random dude, you swore to yourself that- “with Oscar.” Your brain must’ve short circuited right then and there. Your expression must’ve given your shock away, because Lando looked really worried all of a sudden. “…you okay mate?”, his eyebrows knit together in confusion. Quickly, you need to react, otherwise he’ll think you’re a weirdo. “Yeah, totally.”, you gulped, “I just didn’t expect you to start something with your teammate.” Absently, he scratched his arm. “Yeah, i gotta be careful. You know, with PR and stuff.”

Obviously, Oscar is also attending the afterparty. As much as you wanted to dislike him for getting together with your crush, he was so nice that you’d feel like an asshole. As sour as the taste in your mouth was, you were happy for them. They seem to fit together really well, and you couldn’t be mad because your best friend’s relationship is working out, that’s just rude. Nevertheless, the little touches they shared filled you with jealousy. Suddenly, you felt a hand on your shoulder. “Just so you know, I have your favorite white with me. In case you wanna celebrate some more later.”, you could basically hear the smug smile in Lando’s voice. Tempting. Maybe you weren’t feeling so sour after all.

Without much care, you left your shoes somewhere in the hallway, while leading Oscar and Lando towards the balcony. Usually when you were travelling around for competitons, you’d rent a hotel room, since there wasn’t really any point in staying longer than you had to. But for the finale of your season, you wanted to enjoy the beautiful city, before departing again. While your Horse was being flown back to your home country, you decided to rent a holiday home. It was relatively close to the coast, so you’d hear the lively waves when opening the windows. Your thoughts were cut short by the sound of shuffling cards. More specifically, a deck of UNO cards. Wait what. Why was he shuffling an UNO deck? Where did he even get that from?

“Nah dude, put that back down.” Lando slurred while lazily swatting Oscars hands away. Disgruntled, but indifferent enough, Oscar put the deck of cards back down. “Wild idea: lets revert back to seventh grade and play truth or dare.”, Lando’s face lit up at that. In his mind, he was already going trough all the evil dares he could make you guys do. “We’re literal adults.”, Oscar deadpanned. For a moment, it looked like Lando was thinking about something. “Well, let’s make things more interesting. Every time you pick truth or won’t do the dare, you take off one clothing piece.” He held up one finger, so it was clear that you wouldn’t be stripping completely naked in seconds. That’s an awfully odd request, but with the taste of wine still lingering on your tongue, you could care less. And so, it begun.

“Y/n, truth or dare?”, his intentions were pretty clear, but you wanted to toy with him for a little. “Dare.”, you took another sip of the fourth or fifth Bottle of white wine, that you three have been passing around like biscuits. “An easy one to start with, do a handstand.” Hah, that was a piece of cake. Scrambling off the rattan lounge, you readied yourself to do a handstand against the wall. A free-standing one might be a bit too confident in your current state. With a swift motion you hurled your legs into the air and banged them against the wall, while you did your best to not flop onto the floor. Considering how dizzy you were, you did a good job. “Impressive!”, Oscar giggled. There was nothing to laugh about, the bastard was up next. “Truth or Dare, Os?”, he was quick to answer. “Dare.” Bingo. As rarely as you and Lando got to catch up, he does talk about Oscar often. This man doesn’t even know hoe much you know about him. “I dare you to whistle.”, his smile faded. He was ninety percent sure you were aware of the elephant in the room. He sighed before pulling his shirt off. “I can’t whistle.”

Admittedly, this was much more fun than you initially thought it’d be. It must’ve already been something past midnight, but you guys were chatting away on the balcony. By now, your and Oscar’s shirts and socks had gone, while Lando was barely left in his briefs. “Truth or Dare?”, Lando intently looked at you. “Dare.” Now you’ve gotten yourself stuck in his trap. “I dare you to kiss me.”, now that made you stop in your tracks. “Dude, I’m not a homewrecker.” Oscar’s hickory eyes had a playful glint in them. “I’ll allow it.”, he leant against the backing of the lounge, readjusting his seat. Your heart pounded loudly in your chest. This is what you wanted for so long, but this feels taboo. Nevertheless, you leant forward and slid a hand behind your friend’s neck. Pulling him closer your lips met his and a contempt sigh left Lando. You felt Oscars eyes on you, they were burning holes into your skull. After all you were kissing his fling right now. The world seemed as if it was melting apart into a big mess of colors, but that all stopped when Lando gently pulled away. With slightly shaky hands, you settled back into a comfortable sitting position. “Oscar.”, he hummed, “Truth or dare?” He exaggeratedly tapped his finger against his chin. “Truth.” He now looked directly into your eyes. “Why didn’t you have a problem with me kissing Lando.”, his eyes widened at your question. For a moment he seemed to think for a good answer, but instead of speaking up, he glanced over at Lando. The brit loudly gulped, it sounded almost comical, before speaking up. “So, the thing is…” His, whatever Oscar was to him, tapped him on the knee, encouraging Lando to speak up. “I like you. Like in a gay way.” Dumbfounded, you shifted your gaze from Oscar to Lando and then back again at the pale Aussie. “And you’re ok with that?!”, you pointed your finger towards Oscar. “You see, we actually wanted you to... join our relationship.” His tone was unsure, and he kept searching Lando’s gaze.

Now you were officially flabbergasted. This must be a fever dream, right? There was no way this was real right now.

Obviously, it was, because now you were sat here with Lando kissing down your neck and Oscar pressed up behind you, squeezing your thighs, hips and waist. You leant your head backwards against Oscar’s shoulder, whining quietly. You whispered sharply, “I dare you to take those damn pants off.”, while fiddling with the buckle of his belt. Oscar chuckled lightly before slipping his pants off and propping himself up behind you again. Carefully, you reached behind you and felt his hard member in your hand. With gentle motions, you began palming him as best as possible. Lando smiled against your neck, his eyes darting up to meet Oscar’s gaze. His tanned hand tugged on your underwear before swiftly slipping underneath it. You gasped at the tight feeling of his hand around your dick. Slowly but surely, he started pumping up and down, meanwhile he continued his artwork of hickeys along your neck and chest bone. Not wanting to neglect his hard cock, you wrapped your hand around it and pressed your thumb over the tip. He exhaled sharply. Oscar leaned in close to your ear. “You wanna suck them?” Stuck in an endless loop of pleasure and torture, you could only whine as a pathetic attempt at an answer.

[purplec1oud]

"be my, be my baby!"

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✿`°k.tetsurou x reader

summary: you've had the biggest crush on kuroo but never got the courage to ask him out, luckily you had kenma who you could trust with it and rant to. He eventually got tired of u not making the first move he decided to take matters in his own hands.

warnings: none, just pure fluff

word count: 1.2k

song: be my baby–ariana grande°`☆▪︎♥︎

note: this is my first time writing so pls bear with me :,D

OKAY LET'S DO THIS

"I still don't get what you see in him so much." Kenma casually spat out while you two were facetiming. Even tho Kuroo was his childhood friend he didn't understand much of the hype of you being that much in love with him. "oh come on, he's a great guy. Plus he helps me with chemistry." you said thinking about the many times he helped you out with certain chem lessons cuz you weren't on good terms with the subject. Something about the way he explained it to you, his voice like music to your ears while explaining really made you develop a crush.

While talking, Kenma stared into his screen as his eyes moves from the left to the right. "Kuroo texted me" he said. "Really what did he say?" "He's asking if we want to hang out tomorrow. Looks like he wants to go to the carnival" "That sounds fun! I'd love to go" you said excitingly since you always used to love going on the rides and enjoying the food. You noticed a small smile on Kenma's mouth all of a sudden but decided not to think so much of it.

The 3 of you decided to meet up at the entrance. Making your way up to the entrance of the carnival you saw Kuroo standing there on his phone waiting, "gosh he looks so handsome" you thought to yourself as you slowly walked up to him. He lifted up his head and immediately smiled, greeting you. You two chatted, while waiting for Kenma to arrive so you all can go have fun. Tho it seemed that he had other plans-you suddenly got a text and opened to see it was from him. "hey sorry I can't make it something came up last minute :(" your heart sank knowing you have to now spend time with the guy you have a crush on, all alone and also knowing that you can be very awkward time to time.

"Where is this guy?" Kuroo sighed, looking around. You took a deep breath and told him that he won't be able to make it and that he has texted you. "Oh that's unfortunate. Well we can still have fun together!" Despite having moments like these where something ruins a plan, Kuroo always managed to still put a smile on people's faces. You smiled softly, nodding as you both walked in. And honestly you have to admit that it still went amazing. You were looking at the sunset as you and Kuroo decided to go on the ferris wheel before you both went home. What you didn't know was that Kuroo has been staring at you with such love in those eyes of his-he didn't even realises he was smiling like an idiot, ear to ear.

"The sunset is very beautiful, isn't it Tetsu?" saying that while you decided to start taking a few pictures of it. "It sure is" Kuroo answered still completely out of touch, just staring at your beautiful hair since your back was facing him. "Look at these pict-" you turned around only to catch him off guard. Kuroo immediately looked away, face getting red from the fact that he was caught staring. You let out a slight chuckle and decided to brush it off. The confession was still on your mind and you thought that you should take this as an opportunity- i mean even if he rejected you, atleast you'll be glad that you said it and got an answer, instead of wondering. "Hey Kuroo, can I tell you smth?" He turned around, clearing his throat. "yeah ofc, what is it?" you took a deep breath and swallowed hard before- "I've actually been meaning to say this to you for the longest time but I never really knew how to. I've had a crush on you for such a long time and it's completely fine if you don't feel the same way. I just needed to get this out of my chest befo-" you got interrupted by two hands cupping your cheeks, soft lips meeting yours. You were shocked by his sudden movement that you didn't know how to react- "should you kiss him back? or push him away?" Tho the butterflies in your stomach said otherwise: making you kiss him back. He then pulled away looking into your eyes. Still being shocked and flustered you covered your face with your hands which make Kuroo chuckle showing his smug smile. "I like you too Y/N. I have for some time I just never thought you'd like me back" he admitted while scratching the back of his head.

After the ride was over you both got down and decided it was time to go home. Kuroo insisted on walking you back home, even tho you didn't live who knows how far away-needless to say you let him. As you two were walking he held your hand, enterlocking your fingers which made you smile as you looked down at them. "Thank you for tonight. I had an amazing time" you said while looking at him. "I enjoyed our time together as well. Hey..since we admitted our feelings to each other why don't I.. take you out on a date?" You could tell he was a bit shy and nervous which made you think it was the cutest thing ever. Walking up to him, you kissed his lips before saying "I'd love to go on a date with you, boyfriend"- oh boy he was done for: bright red cheeks, expression of not knowing what to say or how to act, making you laugh. "Goodnight Tetsu" you said as you walked inside of your house. "Y-yeah..goodnight" he was still speechless but after he got excited knowing you accepted his offer and walked back home happily.Plopping on your bed, opening your phone you saw you had a message.

Kenma: so how did it went? You confessed? ;)

Y/N: YES I DID OMG I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT AVHJWQKS

Kenma: ha planned worked

Y/N: wait what? Wdym by that

Kenma: I lied when I said I can't make it so you can finally confess to that rooster head and it worked. I'm proud of you Y/N :)

Y/N: KENMA YOU'RE SO EVILL :,D but thank you so much you're the best !!

<The End>

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[kanmom51]

https://www.tumblr.com/kanmom51/712812388735418368/is-letter-a-song-for-army-the-baby-jm-never?source=share

I was going through this particular post and felt emotional...

Jm really calls jk baby isn't it?? We saw in the show too...things are slowly falling back to places just like many had doubts like why would the two bandmates supposed friends or the worst "not good mates, hate eachother so much to breathein the same place" travel to countries shooting a show in their last moment of freedom instead of laying happily beside their supposed gf or bf right.

They did tell us indirectly that they are together in their life without saying anything...just like everytime they did...

Hey there. :)

This is the post you linked:

Just read it again and ok then, what can I say, I am impressed. Quite the talented writer whoever wrote that one.😜

But seriously, am I a fortune teller or what? This was way before we even dreamt of a Jikook travel show giving us 9 hours more or less of authentic Jikook interactions. I'm not going to say uncensored, because there was clearly some censorship going on, at times on their part (awareness of cameras) and at times from the editors. But man, even with all of that, now that we are on the other side of this show you need to be really daft not to see they are telling us they are a couple. And if the show didn't convince us, well, this HAD to:

Oh, and JM calling JK baby... lol.

You know, like he did while talking to him in Letter...

Admit it.

You weren't surprised, right?

Only surprise was that once again it was allowed in.

But then again, purposefully so.

I know many are calling it a soft launch and well maybe you can call it that. But I would rather not label it. I will just sit here and enjoy what they have given us, which is so so much.

In this show we basically got first and foremost JM and JK telling us and showing us that they are, without a doubt, the closest duo in the group of 7. This comes on the tail of a couple of years where oh so many were claiming and reveling in what they thought was an apparent distance between the two. Apparent to those that for some reason think that these young superstars live their private lives for us to fully see. I guess (more so hope) that those ideas were laid to rest. And that for once and for all people finally realize that the two actually have a private life that we are not fully aware of. That the two spend time together even if we don't hear about it. That the two were and still are super close - intimately close.

And that takes me to my next point. It's not that the show revealed something that we weren't aware of when it comes to the level of intimacy between the two of them. It's not that they hadn't told us all of this over the years. It's that people were unwilling to hear it or see it and with the show we got to see it, 9 hours worth of it. Them on their own and them with their good friend that insisted on joining and was for most part allowing them to do their own thing. Not only did Tae's presence not disprove Jikook's closeness and intimacy (something many were hoping for), it actually highlighted it. It highlighted just how different, how much MORE JM and JK are with each other as opposed to either of them with Tae. Even when the three were spending time together (and I say even because much of the time Tae just left them to do their own thing or even if he was with them).

So yes, this was them allowing us to see just a little bit more of THEM. Together. The playfulness, the chemistry (again, something we were "warned" about in the promos - their known chemistry...), the way they just flow with each other, JK clearly being JM's cook (we get that in words and actions) and so much more.

I am not a fortuneteller and as such I can only write in hopes and wishes. I do hope and wish that this is them setting a new reality for the fandom. Yes the fandom should have caught on by now just how close they are. They basically never hid it, even if at times they pulled back with what we were shown (for many many reasons, some personal some towing the company line). But I am really hoping that post AYS Jikook will indeed be louder in the sense that they will allow us to continue and see THEM without the pullback we got at times. Because Army will accept THEM and embrace THEM. That the Jikook we get post military will be able to mention one another and it will be a new normal, not an eyebrow raising event. That JK won't have to say he'll get his toiletries and go over to shower at JM's because they will be living together in JK's new mansion. That they wouldn't have to hide it because people would finally accept them for who they are and who they love.

[cactus-cuddler]

Chapter 3: 𝐀 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫

Series' masterlist | previous chapter | next chapter

Word count: 1,8 k

Summary: you and Bucky works together, you as bartender and Bucky as bodyguard. You spend a lot of time together and now you know better

Warnings: man

Tag list: @mcira @robynanthonystark @sofiaavarga13

(if you want to be added write to me)

ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀᴘᴘʀᴇᴄɪᴀᴛᴇᴅ <3

You and Bucky have been working together at the same bar for a few weeks now. Since he started, you feel safer and sense a growing chemistry between you two. He comes to the bar regularly during your shifts, and when it's empty, you chat and get to know each other better. However, you can tell there's something he's not sharing with you.

You're opening the door to prepare the bar for the day when the man who occupies your thoughts appears behind you.

“Good morning, Y/N,” he says, and you wave back with a smile.

You enter and clean the floor, arrange the tables, and flip the sign to “open" together. Bucky takes his usual spot at the counter while you dry the remaining glasses.

“You should ask for a raise for all the work you do,” you say, chuckling. He helps you open in the morning, serves when it's too busy in the afternoon, and at night, he does his job as the bar’s bodyguard.

"I wouldn't call it work since I get to spend time with a pretty girl," he replies, making you blush and giggle, thinking he's joking. But he’s never been more serious. Your heartbeat speeds up, and he smiles at your reaction.

"You're cute when you do that," he says, probably deciding to make you faint, and he would have succeeded if an old lady hadn't entered the bar with her little dog. While you serve the lady, he sips the orange juice you prepared for him, watching you work. He finds you incredible. Even though you don't like the job, you're always sweet and nice to the customers, even though most don't deserve your kindness. He considers himself among those who don't deserve it.

The first day he entered the bar was by chance. He was intent on drinking away his memories, forgetting his name for a few hours of peace. But you stopped him, convincing him with your smile. No one had given him such a beautiful, bright smile in years, so he decided to stay. As you moved, he noticed the men's eyes trying to see beyond what was allowed, and he feared they might hurt you. He decided to protect you, hoping to feel like a better person. Your kindness touched his heart with extreme delicacy, and he hopes you never change.

"What are you thinking about?" you ask, seeing him distracted, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"Nothing," he replies. "I'll see you this evening. I have to go now, okay?" he adds, and you greet him with one of your smiles��the same one that bewitched him that day.

Today, you have to cover Megan's shift. She has an important appointment, and you'll be working alone this evening. Staying inside the bar all day makes you nervous, but it's not the first time, and now Bucky is here, even though he's gone for now but will be back later.

You've been waiting a long time for him to ask you out on one of your days off, but that moment never comes. There are many times when he seems intent on asking you out but then says, "No, nothing. I'm sorry," and returns to his silence. You asked Megan for advice, but all she could say was, "If he doesn't ask you out, stop talking to him. Don't waste your time chasing someone who doesn't take you right away." You can't understand why; you can tell there's something between you. You see it in the way he looks at you, how he protects you, and the few smiles he offers. Since becoming the bodyguard, he accompanies you home every day, but since that first time, he has never come in again. He makes sure you get inside and then leaves you alone in your apartment with your screaming neighbors.

The rest of the day passes calmly. There aren't many customers, so you find time to continue reading your book and eat something since you missed your lunch break. Bucky shows up just before his night shift starts. He’s dressed as always for his job: a tight black t-shirt and sweatpants, but he has a bouquet of flowers in his hands. When he walks towards you, you smile at him in surprise.

“Here,” he says, almost rudely, to hide his embarrassment. He's not convinced that bringing you flowers was a good idea; it was his friend Sam Wilson who convinced him.

"Thank you," you reply and approach him to kiss him on the cheek.

"You're welcome," he says and walks stiffly towards the door without turning to look at you. You smell the bouquet and smile like a child at his gesture.

“Oh, I forgot,” he says, turning around and pulling a chocolate bar out of his pocket—your favorite chocolate bar. You think you might die.

"Since Megan isn't here and it was her turn to bring the chocolate, I thought it would be nice to get it for you," he says in a hoarse, cold voice, as if he wasn't saying the nicest thing anyone has ever said to you. You don't hold back and decide to hug him, your arms around his neck. He doesn't know how to react but gently places his hands on your back, letting you hold him. As soon as you break away, there is an awkward moment, and you say goodbye and return to your work after dividing the chocolate. You with a smile on your lips and him with slightly red cheeks. 'I should follow Sam's advice more often,' he thinks as he positions himself at the entrance. He tries to keep a serious expression that can induce fear, but he just doesn't have it. Your sweet scent is imprinted on his clothes, and your arms around his neck are well anchored in his memory.

You put the flowers in a vase at the counter. You’ll take them home later, but the night is long, and you don't want them to get ruined. Little by little, the bar fills with the usual men looking for Megan, but it’s just you, and you have to do your best to satisfy your customers. You take all the orders and gradually start serving.

"Hey, little doll, can you give me your number?" a man at the counter asks. You smile warmly and ignore his question, asking if he wants something to drink.

“I would like to drink you,” he whispers, winking. Your smile fades, and you look for a way to make him stop.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not on the menu. What do you need?" you insist. The man reaches his hand toward your face, but you push it away.

“A whore dressed like you shouldn't be resisting so much,” he says, grabbing your wrist tightly. A tear slides down your face. Seeing that no one is trying to help you makes you feel worse, but luckily, Bucky is there. He approaches you and pushes the man away. His gaze is full of hatred, and his hand presses firmly on the man's neck.

"Don't you dare talk like that to a nice, kind girl like her," he warns. The man struggles and frees himself from Bucky's grip, coughing, Bucky's grip having taken his breath away.

"I get it, you want to fuck her. Have fun," he says, punching Bucky in the face. But Bucky has no intention of holding back and takes the man out of the bar.

"I won't call you motherfucker because, for that poor woman, it must be a heavy insult to have a son like you," Bucky says to the man. The cold night air gently caresses the bouncer's hair as he waits for a response. Rather than use his hands for this job, he decided to rely on his sharp tongue.

"Come on, man, you're exaggerating. I wouldn't have done anything more to her than she would want. I know people like her..." he doesn't let him finish the sentence before his good intentions evaporate in the air, and he punches him back, making him fall to the ground.

"You don't know anything about her," he says finally. He goes back inside under everyone's gaze.

You are crying in the kitchen, trying to wash away his touch and words. He comes looking for you, and when he sees you in that state, he hugs you, and you hold onto him.

“Nothing happened, everything is fine,” he whispers. Seeing how that man could insult you in front of everyone without anyone doing anything makes you feel bad. You can't help but think, "What if Bucky hadn't been there?" Bad intentions usually approached Megan; she is the one with more character between the two of you, and she knows how to defend herself better.

You sob in Bucky's arms. Until then, you kept all the unsolicited comments, insults, and everything else inside, casting everything away. Now you just feel like crap. You hate your body being so on display, and you hate everyone who wants to have fun with you.

“Let's get back to work and finish this shift, okay?” Bucky asks, taking your face in his large hands. His warm right hand dries your tears, and his cold left hand tries to ease your pain.

"I'll stay next to you," he whispers, giving you a tender kiss on the tip of your nose. A simple gesture but one that contains all the affection that Bucky has for you.

You go back inside the bar, and some girls approach you to apologize for not having done anything. They didn't think his advances would bother you. Your smile lights up your face again, and you appear grateful for their attention. While you prepare the drinks, Bucky is behind you; while you serve them, he is next to you; and while you are closing the place, cleaning and everything, he is still there with you. As soon as you're done, you go behind the counter, and he's sitting in the place he sat the first time you saw each other, which continues to be his permanent place.

"Can I place an order?" he asks softly as you take the flowers back.

"Of course! Tell me everything," you answer softly.

"Can I ask you on a date?" he asks, his voice soft yet hopeful. You've never been happier. You accept without thinking twice and as you pick up your bag to leave, he tells you he'll pick you up on Saturday. He knows that's your day off.

He walks you home as always, but this time, you ask him to come in so you can treat the wounds from the punch. Your delicate touch on his skin makes every feeling of pain disappear. As soon as his wounds are treated, he leaves, but not before planting a soft kiss on your forehead.

"Goodnight pretty girl," he tells you later.

You think you might be falling in love with this man.

Thanks for reading! If there is something you want to tell me about it feel free to tell me. I would also like what you think and how you would like it to continue <3

I remember that if you want to be added to the tag list, just write to me or a comment here or in messages (it's also good as an excuse to talk, I love meeting new people knowing that we have common interests!♡)

Series' masterlist | previous chapter | next chapter

[violetasteracademic]

I feel like not enough people have actually sat down and read this article, in order, in its entirety, and fully comprehend the development of this (thoroughly planned and staged ) conversation:

Take a look at those paragraphs. Then read them again. One more time for posterity.

Often times with fated mates, the bonds are intense. Metaphorical. Poetic.

But other times- there are no metaphors. The connection seemingly random.

It's after this addressing that not all mating bonds are poetic, thematic, and some are lacking in literary metaphor and meaningful connection, Sarah explains that sometimes she plans for characters to be together and then she literally cannot force them to be together.

Right now there is actually only one mating bond that even remotely fits the category random, anti-thematic, and lacking literary metaphor connecting the two characters together. There is no power. There is no poetry. Only randomness. And Sarah admits sometimes her plans literally cannot be seen through because of chemistry issues. Lol. Guys.

People who say this could be about Azriel and Elain are completely missing the fact that this entire conversation is about mating bonds. And if you think Azriel and Elain are lacking in a connection of power (even though Azriel is the one who discovered her power while her mate couldn't) or theme (even though the amount of themes actually tying Elain and Azriel together in the books is insane) that is literally irrelevant- because this conversation is about some mating bonds being random and lacking literary theme and deep connection, not just any potential romantic pairings.

Read it again. Then again. Aaaaaaand once more, with feeling.

Leaving the photo of Josh and Sarah here so you can see I'm not cutting or rearranging the interview to create my own context- this is where the conversation develops from there:

It's magic in a way how the characters guide the story no matter how many years in advance she tries to plot. The characters (not the strict decisions of the mating bond) guide the story and wind up with the people that offer them the most growth and joy.

Lol. Guys.

Meanwhile, in Az and Elain land in the books following Elain and L/ucien's mating bond reveal:

Elain and L/ucien in the books following the mating bond reveal:

And now here is the next part of the interview- again I have not cut or rearranged or done anything but snap screenshots in order to show the progression of the conversation. We were talking about the use of mating bonds in Sarah's story in everything leading up until now, and we are still talking about it:

After revealing that sometimes her best laid plans don't work out the way she thought, and even she, the author, actually can't control who is right for whom no matter what her intentions were, she shares that her musings on "fated mates" are not set in stone. In fact, she finds the question and ideas interesting. This is all one continuous conversation about fated mates specifically, not about her relationships or love interests in general. The only idea that Az and Elain are relevant to is: What if I was put with the wrong person?

Let me tell you, if an author considers an idea interesting, something that offers a wealth of ideas to explore, and then rattles off about all of the implications and things she finds interesting about it... Babe. She is already writing about it.

SJM has not hidden in recent interviews (including her most recent), that the promise of a happily ever after is why she is a romance author:

She speaks openly about the reassurance of romance. We all love romance for this. We know that the characters are going to end up together, no matter how difficult their journey is along the way.

However, when it comes to mates, she did not confirm she is a "fated mates" author because of the comfort. She did not say that part of what she likes about fated mates is that you know fate can never be wrong and therefore there is trust and reassurance in the process. In fact, what she said was she finds the concept of agency and choice interesting. She muses on how much there is to be explored about agency and free-will after the interviewer said if God put her with the wrong person, that's none of her business. The conversation of an imperfect process is one that a lot of readers find interesting, and SJM has shut down wacky ideas (like Bryce and Hunt not really being mates) in the past. But here, she not only welcomes the conversation, but expands on everything that fascinates her about it.

This is not a woman who will only have her characters ending up with their mates. In fact, she's been building a massive question over it for years.

Meanwhile, in the books:

Free will. Agency. An imperfect system of matching.

Babes. This is all about Elain and L/ucien. Absolutely no one else.

If you cling to their relationship because SJM is a fated mates author and therefore they have to be together, I fear Sarah J. Maas may not be the author for you. She does not believe that the decisions made even by her about who will wind up together are set in stone. She is the one interested in exploring the concept of fate and free will. We did not invent this. She has never once described why she likes the fated mate trope and therefore exclusively uses it, only why she likes stories about romance and love conquering all.

I promise you, it's okay to subvert tropes. In fact, it's fun. It's hot. It's interesting.

The fact that Sarah still has a wealth of ideas to explore regarding mates and fate after years of telling the same story over and over is, frankly, so exciting. To us. To her. To journalists.

She has not come out here once and stood behind fated mates as a non-negotiable trope with her full chest, be it in the actual books that she writes or the conversations she has in interviews. We've been on this journey of questioning fate, Cauldrons, and learning the consequences of the mistakes made for years.

And it's gonna be sooo goooood.

[yakumtsaki]

AND WE'RE BACK. My cancerous thyroid might have briefly cucked me, but now I'm about to cuck every goddamn semi-incestuous couple in this house. Isn't that right, Baby?

-CAWK CAWK

Exactly! Baby here is a parrot that Meadow rolled the want for and I was like sure, what problems could a parrot possibly cause?

-OPEN THIS DOOR. SOMEONE OPEN THIS DOOR FOR ME. OPEN IT RIGHT NOW OPEN IT OPEN IT

Um it should open automatically for you wtf?

-OPEN THE DOOR, MAMMAL TRASH, THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING

Ok Baby seriously why won't the doors open for you?

-I DON'T KNOW BUT I WILL STAY HERE AND PREVENT EVERYONE FROM GOING TO CLASS BECAUSE THEY'RE TOO STUPID TO USE THE OTHER DOOR

Alright then, clearly there's only one solution to this..

Perfection.

-Um, what happened to the door?

-IT ASKED TOO MANY STUPID QUESTIONS. OUT OF THE WAY, HUMMIE SCUM

Well, Baby was clearly a much needed addition to this house. Now, to the main event: an end to the Year of Sin!

NOP, NEVERMIND, SPOKE TOO SOON, MUST DO THIS INSTEAD. We invite Good Witch over for Spice and she asks to bring a friend and it's FUCKING MALCOLM. LMAO. I simply have to, I can't resist-

-Well well well, if it isn't the famous Malcolm Landgraab IV, the finest intergenerational concubine the world has ever seen!

-Huh?

-You were too much of a straggot to date my father, but I know you won't be able to resist the charms of the much better looking son!

-What?

-God, the conversation is just crackling with sexual tension!

-So, Malc, I believe we should make out. Thoughts?

-Where are those fucking butterflies coming from?

-Your stomach? ;)

No, they're from the Good Witch, my bad y'all.

After many, MANY hours of talking, Malcolm finally accepts a lame wolf whistle-

-but our efforts are interrupted by Felina returning from class. WILL YOU GIVE IT A FUCKING REST FOR ONE DAY

-NEVER

-Sorry kid, but if Malcolm Landgraab is to ever consider bisexuality, it will be for someone who can beat up his own sister.

Wtf kinda rule is that you freak?? You know what, just gtfo-

-NO. Stay here, Malcolm, I'd like to hear stories about you and great-great grandma Victoria!

-Oh wow, now that was a real woman. She could hold her liquor, she could whore around, she could beat up anyone.. No man could ask for anyone more feminine!

You are so right, Malcolm, the only one to ever do it better was Long John Silver!

Ok seriously Barth is there a plan here, why are we wasting valuable time on platonic interactions with this loser?

-I just have a feeling true love will prevail!

What are you even talking about-

UM PWND @ ME WTF. ACR DOES IT AGAIN WITH LITERAL NEGATIVE CHEMISTRY LOL

OH FUCK YES TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE. Two Babies with one stone if you will!

-HOW DARE YOU CHEAT ON ME, YOUR OWN FLESH AND BLOOD

Ya ok GROSS but finally we can put this behind us, 1 down, 200 more to go. Cyan go back to your other cousin-lover while you still can because I'm breaking you up too!

-Don't have to tell me twice!

Ugh.

-Hmmm...

What now, Barth.

-Nothing, I just keep forgetting I actually have two eyes.

Ya, you and me both.

-But now that I possess peripheral vision, I see there's so much to be done in this house.

You have set yourself on fire multiple times, please stop with the household tasks, that's why we have a butler.

-But he never actually does anything!

Yes well, his main job is to answer the door and we no longer have one, but it's still money well spent.

-WELL I WILL FIX THE DISHWASHER OR DIE TRYING

-BARTH NO I STILL LOVE YOU

-FUCK YOU SUNSET, YOU BROKE MY HEART BY SLEEPING WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND. HE'S NOT EVEN RELATED TO YOU

Barth no offense but I think I'm ready for your next electrocution to take you out.

-As am I!

-And I!

-GETTING SLAPPED MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY IS STARTING TO AFFECT MY MENTAL HEALTH HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP

You could stop being Satan incarnate?

-No, there has to be a better way!

-How about I sleep with the boyfriend of the only cousin in this house who doesn't already hate me?

Yes, absolutely, and please take another crack at fixing the dishwasher when you're done.

[toutvatoujoursbien]

midnight thoughts (i hope i don't regret this)

Let me preface this by saying that these are just (very, very long) ramblings I’ve had in my head over the past few days and are MY opinions. I never post to Tumblr, but my level of emotional unhinged-ness right now needs an outlet so that I can process everything and feel, well, less unhinged.

I have never been this enamored with any celebrity or promo for a show like I have for this season of Bridgerton. Admittedly, I am a fan of the books and Penelope & Colin are my favorite couple. I’m going to age myself by saying that I read the series almost 20-ish years ago; past me could have never imagined I would actually get to see a Regency romance on my screen. Romances are for the girlies, and what the girlies like tends to be mocked, ridiculed, and not taken seriously - I’ve seen this time and time again across many different fandoms. I also really enjoy the tv series for being its own creative adaptation. I’ve liked many (though not all) of the changes they’ve made to the show; and I’ve liked all the little nods to the books that have been sprinkled in. Are the books or show perfect? Of course not, but that doesn’t mean I can’t love them for bringing me some entertainment and joy and escapism. I think that’s the beauty of it, I get to have the best of both worlds, so to speak. And for me personally, it’s been so fun to watch the press coverage over the past six or so months. As a fandom, I think we’ve been EXTREMELY well fed. 

Having Nicola and Luke as the leads has been a true blessing; I think/hope folks can tell how much they clearly love and understand their characters/roles. I know everyone has been talking nonstop about their chemistry and their close friendship, which I think is beautiful, truly unique and special. How can you not enjoy watching two people, who seem to genuinely like one other, talk endlessly about a project that they love and have poured so much into? And the way they have supported one another, not only during promo, but during their years of friendship? Astonishing, really. So while I am old enough to know better than to ship real people, I would’t blame anyone (myself included) if they got caught up in the whirlwind excitement and couldn’t help but wonder a sincere “What if?” (At least that was the case for me.) Isn’t that the beauty of hope and possibility and potential? Like, I knew rationally and intellectually that the likelihood of them being together was low, but damn if I didn’t feel giddy seeing their interviews, reading articles, and watching video after video.

“Oh, but it’s all PR!” they cry. Maybe, but like most of life, I don’t think it’s so simple or clear. I think there’s been a lot of nuance and perhaps some blurring of the lines during this promo tour. As long as we are respectful about it and realize that at the end of the day, the only opinions that matter in regards to their relationship are N & L’s, I don’t think some lighthearted dreaming is unheard of. We have to remember, though, that what we’re shown is only a fraction of their true selves, carefully and deliberately curated to accommodate their status as actors/celebrities/those in the public eye. 

(And yes, I know this is the internet and therefore everyone has an opinion - again, myself included. But I struggle to understand why some people think that their opinions should be deemed THE most important to the discussion or would have an impact on any type of outcome, especially in this particular scenario… I hope it’s obvious I’m referring to the very vocal people that chose to expend their energy in hateful, negative ways. Aren’t you exhausted?

However, as a longtime lurker, I have to admit it’s been absolutely fascinating reading all the different perspectives and takes on this too. I think reading other POVs and seeing people articulate points that challenge me and make me think is a good thing - again, as long as it’s all in a respectful manner. 

Also I have spent literal years curating and cultivating a social media bubble that doesn’t make me want to cry or give up on life. I don’t seek out negativity and hate - constructive criticism for a thing is a different matter. It may be “putting blinders up,” but honestly, real life can be a shitty enough place that I would like to spend my limited time online looking at cute things and learning or reading about stuff that makes me feel less alone in the world.)

Last week, I stayed off social media to avoid Bridgerton spoilers until I could watch Part 2. I did open Twitter on Thursday to check on something that was entirely unrelated, saw the absolute meltdown of a shitstorm brewing and quickly NOPED out of it. (I was also reminded of why Twitter scares me at times. And I'm not calling it X because that is stupid.) When I finally caught up over the weekend (both with Bridgerton and… all the other stuff 😅), I felt like I was experiencing mental and emotional whiplash.

Look, ultimately, I don’t know them personally and know even less about their private lives. As an outside observer (even though, yes, I have a vested interest in them), Nicola is fucking amazing and Luke seems to be a nice, sweet guy. I think they are each others support, and it has been mentioned many times that she has helped him deal with the intensity/anxiety of being in the spotlight this season. So here are some potentially hot takes: I just think, when they’re together, it’s like he’s a different, better person. When he soaks up even a little bit of her light (sorry, I had to), I can see all the qualities in him that she is constantly gushing about. But, and again this is my take on it, I also think he has a lot of growing up to do. I don’t know much about his supposed “hot/fuck boy summer,” but it seems to me that he’s perhaps going through his own Colin phase, which he can totally do. I genuinely want to see him and Nic succeed. However, I do think he’s got to get a better handling on his media image now (this whole thing reeks of a PR nightmare, but I need to take off my comms professional hat). The way this has all played out has been, imo, a clusterfuck. There are other issues that I’m also not going to get into at the moment. 

The thing that frustrated me the most is the timing of those “leaked” photos. You’re telling me that N&L went through SIX months of a - literal - worldwide promo tour, building up hype, doing countless interviews and appearances, etc., only to have these pap pictures “captured” on the night of the Pt. 2 London premiere??? And yes, while I’m aware there were rumblings of a gf being at various events/locations, I didn’t pay much attention to it (read: my curated social media bubble, lol). And I think the lack of confirmation up to that point from Luke and his team just mades things even more tricky/messy. So when the inevitable backlash played out online, piled on top of the hate Polin seems to get from many corners of the internet (Is it ship wars? Regular trolls just trolling? Polin and/or Lukola antis? People who, for whatever reason, don’t like the actors themselves or, worse, don’t like the creative choices/decisions made by the higher-ups and therefore deem it okay to spread hate online? All of the above, most likely.), I know I felt like I had been hit by a train.

Here’s my point: I think what should have been a moment of triumph and a joyous occasion for Nic, Luke, and Bridgerton season 3, was sadly overshadowed by the aforementioned shitstorm. And that’s a damn shame. Too many cast and crew put in a lot of time, effort, and blood sweat and tears, to pull this all together. I was happy with Season 3, which perhaps I will deep dive about in another post because this one has already spiraled out of control. Were there things I wished they had included or, rather, things that could have been left out? Yes, of course. But at the end of the day, I think we got a beautiful story led by two actors who love Polin as much as we do. And I cannot wait to see them back for Season 4. Plus, seriously, those viewing numbers alone should have been mostly what people are talking about. I hope all this doesn’t take away from the overall impact of the show and season.

I think it’s okay to be disappointed by all the stuff that has come out over the last few days. I think it’s perfectly human to want/need to process your thoughts and emotions. What is NOT OKAY is sending hate to anyone, period. And I hope you don’t let all that has happened sour your enjoyment of Season 3 and/or Polin.

Lastly, if you take anything away from this long ass post, it’s that Nicola is a GODDAMN QUEEN. Anyone who says otherwise is speaking slander and we do not stand for that in this house. She has carried herself during this time with grace, charm, and poise, consistently and constantly. And she is always ready for a mega fashion moment. She must be exhausted - already on to her next film/job but also perpetually online, and even stepping up to defend her costar. I may have to do a whole separate post just gushing about her and add to all the people already singing her praises. (And as a big fuck you to all the haters.)

Geez Louise, I clearly have a lot of feelings (more than I allowed myself to believe I did…). But I would love to hear what others think! Please, I need friends with whom I can have rational (okay, maybe slightly unhinged), spirited, deep analyses and discussion of this whole thing, or anything else we might have in common!

[nightlyrequiem]

Be Still My Heart

Chapter 8- Five Steps Forward

Masterlist AO3

New Chapter Every Saturday

You're the best in the meth industry but a new product suddenly pops up. You and your boss, Valeria, must figure out who is making it so you can take back the market. All the while tension is building between the two of you.

A/N: Things will get interesting in the next chapter. Anyway, I have every chapter outlined but sometimes when I write I stray from the plot. I did so a bit here. I wanted to work on the chemistry between Reader and Valeria. It's hard trying to write heartfelt moments with Valeria while also trying to keep her canon personality

Tags/Warnings: Illegal Substances, Boss Employee Relationship, Angst, Some Hurt/Comfort, Violence, Manipulation, Suggestive Themes, Smut (But Only in CH20.), Dual POV

Valeria is finally making back all that lost revenue. She sifts through reports and graphs over the last few weeks. Watching that little green line slowly crawl up. Larger batches for a lower price proved to be a good business move. Despite now finally rivalling the Super Meth, Deigo still wants to go down to Pajaro Azul. Snuff out the competition anyway. Valeria still finds herself wary of treading on hostile territory, but she sees where he's coming from. Having another product that close to your own in quality is cutting it far too close for comfort.

She sets aside the stack of papers. Things are finally getting good, but they aren't yet stable. At least she's making progress with you. You two have even had your unofficial first and second dates. Cooking meth together and drinking wine. Maybe you didn't see those events as dates, but Valeria certainly did. She's confident there's something growing between the two of you. Valeria stretches and yawns. She had offered to have you come over, to paint you. Truth is, she's painted you already. Quite a few times. Each attempt more accurate than the last.

Although for each five steps forward you seem to take two back. Valeria thought you'd be more comfortable at work if she presented herself as a friend, but you've gone back to yourself imposed isolation. Valeria hardly sees you and when she tries to speak your answers are all dry and bare bones. It's frustrating for Valeria but she's not giving up on you. She wonders how you'll feel when she tells you who she sent to Pajaro Azul. a couple enforcers as well as Corra. Will Corra's absence make you feel better? It certainly made Valeria feel better. she knows you don't want anything to do with Corra, refusing to even stay in the same room as her, but Valeria feels paranoid that for whatever reason you two will fall back on speaking terms. She still views Corra as a threat to you and her. Having her gone really makes life better.

Wood scraping against wood sounds through the room as Valeria stands, pushing her chair back. She runs her fingers through the shiny black strands of her hair, which now dangle against her shoulders. Her hair is getting longer, she muses. She needs to cut it soon. Valeria adjusts her belt and holsters before making her way towards the door. Time to put an end to your isolation. Valeria strides down the long halls with purpose. she goes unstopped, people know better than to bother her. She keeps a sharp eye out though. Watching for any unacceptable behavior. She's had too many of her men get high on the job. 

Seems everyone is on their best behavior today. Valeria stops in front of the metal door leading down into the concealed, illegal, very professional meth lab. She gives the door a few, swift knocks before walking inside.

"Suit!" You bark without looking at her. Valeria inwardly sighs. You always stick so closely to rules and safety procedures. It makes you an excellent worker, but sometimes Valeria thought you could do with some loosening up. 

"Why don't you come out here and take a break." She suggests, voice echoing through the room. "You've been down here for ages."

"Can't lose my flow." You reply. Struggling to lift a heavy container. The pseudoephedrine, if Valeria is remembering correctly.

Valeria leans against the wall. Unimpressed.

"Take a break." She says firmly. You awkwardly halt, instinctively wanting to follow her orders but then you go back to work. Pouring the pseudo into a flask. Valeria says your name. "Take a break."

You finally stop and turn to face her. Watching from behind the glass eye holes of your gas mask. You don't speak though. Instead, you reluctantly approach her. Moving past her up the stairs. In the hallway you take off your gas mask. She watches appreciatively as a bead of sweat slowly drips down your neck. Valeria moves to stand beside you. Crossing her arms over her chest.

"How's it going?" Valeria asks. "You almost done this batch?"

You shrug. "Halfway there." That's it. Halfway there. Valeria waits for you to speak. You don't. You stand there stiffly and stare off into space.

"Did something happen?" She asks, narrowing her eyes at you. Apart from the whole thing with Corra but Valeria doesn't think you should still be upset over that.

"No, why?" You don't even look at her as you speak. It annoys her. 

Valeria raises a hand and scratches her nose. "Because you've been moody for weeks, acting like a sullen teenager."

You frown at her. "I'm not acting like a 'sullen teenager.'" You say defensively. 

"No?" Valeria says, raising her brows. "Sure seems like it."

You scoff at her and smile, though you're not amused. Still, even though your smile isn't genuine she thinks it looks good on you. She'd like to see you do it more often. "Am I supposed to just smile and laugh all the time? Is that how I have to be to avoid being accused of being a 'sullen teenager'?"

Your anger is better than your silence. Valeria leans in and gets in your face.

"You're acting like one right now." She sneers. "Just a few words away from 'it's not a phase, mom!'"

You recoil with an appalled expression. "You're just like the rest of them." You snap. Catching Valeria off guard. "Doesn't matter what I do or say it's never the right thing for you people."

"You people?" Valeria parrots, furrowing her brows.

"Yeah, you people." You retort. "I cook meth for you, I'm not here to be some social butterfly, and news flash-" Your voice raises. "-I'm allowed to be upset."

Valeria frowns at you. "Relax, I'd remember who I'm speaking to if I were you." She warns quietly. Though she is considering your words.

She watches you shake your head. As if you were disappointed with her. That's definitely not what she wants. Valeria swallows her irritation. 

"Why are you upset?"

"You accused me of acting childish."

"I accused you of acting like a sullen teenager." She corrects. "You were upset before that though. Why?"

You eye her like she's setting a trap. "It doesn't matter how old I or the people around me get. Nothing ever changes." You reply. "It's like there's something wrong with me and they know it at first glance. I'm treated like a joke."

Valeria almost empathizes with your frustration. "Do you think I see you as I joke?" She asks.

You don't respond right away. Chewing on the inside of your cheek and you mull over your words. "I'm not sure how you see me." You admit. "Sometimes it feels like you value me and the work I do here and sometimes I get the feeling that you see me as some sort of pet."

Silence settles in the dust between the two of you. Your words lingering in the air like moisture. Valeria breathes it into her body. Absorbing them.

"I do value the work you do." Valeria says. For once she's being completely honest. Not just saying things to butter you up. "You're intelligent and reliable. Without you we wouldn't be making the money that we do." The Cartel was making plenty before you came into the picture but after Valeria's incarceration, profit plummeted. They'd likely still be struggling or have crumbled completely if you hadn't boldly stridden into her office demanding a job. You were transparent in what you had to offer and looked her in the eye the entire time. it impressed her enough to hire you. Sometimes she wished she turned you away though. Her attachment to you is frustrating.

"Any chemist worth their pseudoephedrine could cook meth." You reply dismissively. Crossing your arms and looking away. You're much more relaxed though. A clear invitation for Valeria to continue.

"Sure." Valeria says. "But you're cheaper and I find you tolerable."

"I'm tolerable and cheap. You really know how to flatter a girl." You say dryly.

Valeria stares at you intensely. 

"I'll do more to you than simple flattery, chemist." She says quietly. She catches you off guard. Watching you ponder over the meaning of her words. Innuendo or threat, you don't seem to know. "I've decided to send some people over to Pajaro Azul."

You frown. "Why?" 

Valeria can practically smell the insecurity seeping out of your pores. 'You don't think my product is good enough?' "It's a good idea to crush this issue at the source, eliminate the competition and their customers will become our customers."

"What about the Cartel down there?" You worry. 

Valeria narrows her eyes. "You don't think I'm able to handle them?" She asks. Valeria doesn't like the idea of looking weak, but she especially doesn't want you to see her that way.

You shake your head quickly.

"No, but I don't want it to cause unnecessary problems."

Valeria lays a hand on your shoulder. Feeling the warmth from your body through the thin plastic of your scrubs. "Some problems are necessary, sweetheart."

"Sweetheart?"

"You won't need to worry about those ones, just cook us meth and I'll deal with everything else."

She manages to shut down any other protests. For now.

[psychiccent]

The Elephant in The Room: Frederica

I almost made this as a post for Shinkane week but wanted to keep the attention primarily on my fav Psycho couple. The Frederica/Kogami situation might be worrisome for some shippers, but I absolutely ADORE watching the interactions play out between these two characters. When analyzing, we can spot key differences in how both relationships are handled/developed by our PP Overlords.

It is safe to say that Frederica harbors an attraction for Ko... THAT aspect of the story, the writers have made no secret of. Poor Tenzing had to witness Frede pull out the big guns in their initial meeting, noting the arch of Frede's back/chest as she bent forward to interact with Ko. There is even a scene in the Sinners novelization wherein Frederica sets the mood for SOMETHING to happen between them using body language and a suggestive tone. During this scene, we learn something vital about the current dynamic that exists between these two: The attraction felt here is running on a one-way street, with no reciprocation in sight from Ko. What DOES Kogami end up doing in this situation? An obviously attractive woman, neutral in standing for now, is exhibiting a keen interest in getting closer to you. It's an easy way for the writers to establish the potential for chemistry and yet... Deciding that he doesn't know WHAT to make of all that Frederica is silently offering, Ko settles for simply ignoring the obvious and the scene ends shortly after. I believe this serves as another callback to Ko not being a casual fling type of guy. These interactions (and many others) help reinforce the idea that Kogami is not a man easily swayed by traditional beauty standards, despite the man's knack for letting his instincts reign supreme in most situations.

That scene was a bit of a missed opportunity, don't you think? There is another moment wherein Ko introduces Frede as someone from his home country, and we have another male gaze in the room posed to appreciate the obvious appeal that Frede brings to the table. In this scene, writers could have taken it a tiny step further (if this was truly their intent to establish SOMETHING here) and have the merc outright assume that Frede was Ko's woman. But no such conclusions were drawn, no implications of Ko enjoying his newfound company or missing home...nada. The same can't be said for Akane and Ko, whom have enemies nicknaming Akane 'JULIET' of all things, Shion sounding the alarm anytime those two are together, or the fact that Gino's reactions to their (Akane and Ko's) ACTIONS speaks volumes.

Kogami strikes me as a man with a desire for both understanding AND intimacy when it comes to potential partners, and the life Ko has led so far has not been ideal for cultivating that kind of love/connection. We see, through Ko and Frede's interactions that they function well as a unit/team but are still learning about one another. Whatever level of intimacy/understanding that Ko needs to share with his potential love interest is (whoever that may be *COUGHAKANECOUGH*), Frede is a far cry from being able to qualify in that particular category. Frede's dynamic with Kogami is, in my opinion, what a proper Inspector/Enforcer relationship SHOULD have been like between Ko and Akane (with less emphasis on the obvious attraction undertones, of course) and when looking at these two relationships from that perspective, the parallels we can observe are very telling.

I also can't help but mention that in supplementary PP content (I believe it was a game?) , it is stated that Ko is not a fan of having people/girls hanging off of, or otherwise pining over him... they even joke and say that it's the other way around and Akane is shocked to discover this "side" of Ko. I will take that with a grain of salt, but it certainly checks out with what we have seen so far, don't ya think? Is it impossible for Kogami and Frederica to wind up together? of course not, anything can happen! But color me surprised if that is the direction the writers decide to take.

[deluweil]

Here's the thing, I have nothing against Lou/Tommy, but the accessive enthusiasm of him returning and everyone already talking about him showing up for next season,

Which if any of you watched for the last 7 seasons, it is very possible because writers love to drag temps over to the next seasons because apparently breakups are for season beginners, mostly (except for taylor),

is very off-putting.

1. Because the dude literally just showed up and they haven't even had one worthy make out session to even call it a situationship.

2. Buck hurt Eddie physically to get into Tommy's mouth and pants, which ruined it for me from the start tbh and Tommy had nothing to do with it, he was just there.

3. Buck has made Maddie's day, his coming out party - that is a big NO in my book. Because one, dude you literally came out, what if you decide eventually that you don't want this or don't want this with this specific first-guy-ever anymore? And two SHE IS YOUR SISTER THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS HAVE HER LEAVE ON HER HONEYMOON BEFORE YOU KILL YOUR PARENTS OF A HEART- ATTACK.

Even if they "seem accepting" to Buck’s face, this takes time to process, something better revealed in time and in private, once one is sure. Not thinking and talking about this the whole wedding!

And yes, I know, Buck is impulsive, but think for a second, would you want your baby brother to hijacke your wedding after so long of planning it? I know I would have killed him.

Would have told him in advance that if he's bringing his new boyfriend to my wedding, he better tell our parents first. Because this is my fucking day!

I love Buck, but his self-centered personality rubs me the wrong way this season.

Maybe because I wanted to see him growing the fuck up after 7 years and so many traumas and experiences and therapy that he went through, but nope, same old Buck, only instead of the dating the girl who gave him attention, he's seeing the guy who gave him attention.

It's annoying, it's off putting and frankly I am so mad at the writers and Tim for this because these characters deserved better.

And don't talk to me about representation because Shonda did the bi representation in Station 19 perfectly to the point that I was bummed that Travis and Eli didn't end up as endgame even though I loved Emmett with Travis.

Again somehow the 911 writers managed to taint for me what should have been and amazing experience, independent completely of buddie, but no they managed to not only mix Eddie and Buck with Tommy, the whole thing came at the expense of Eddie, physically and mentally, because not only did Buck not apologized to Eddie, Eddie also lost his new friend who now fawns over Buck.

So screw this storyline, I hate it and I hate how everyone is OK with everything that happened in the story, just because Buck is doing a dude(kissing really, there was no doing yet).

There's a lot of blocking in my future, most are just ppl who either came in now because of bi Buck or those who came from other disappointing fandoms and are just here for the rep not the actual story.

But some of us have been here since S1, we want the rep, but we want it to be complimenting, we want to fall in love with the character before it turns into a LI, we want the emotion, the connection, the obvious love building over several years.

Like Casey and Gabby and Severide and Stella, like Maya and Carina, like Travis and Emmett (even though I liked Eli better for him) like Sullivan and Natasha.

I want an emotional payout, give up the surprises, and the wrecked trucks and ships, just tell a good story!

And for the love of all that's holy, enough with the last-minute changes, those never turn out well in the long run. They literally started from scratch when they made the switch between Eddie and Buck.

Also in my opinion, Eddie had a LOT more chemistry with Lou/Tommy than Buck. It would have made so much more sense, in the catholic guilt and internal homophobia department, the nun and supposedly commitment issues was weak at best.

It could have been epic. 😩

And yes, Buck could have started the season single, no harm in that, maybe make him, I don't know, actually growing into something that he would like without someone else to pet his ego? Go back to therapy, work for the LT. exams, be interim captain, realize his worth and learn to love himself for him, not because someone else gave him attention and that made him preen, get him somewhere worthy. Even lessons with Tommy without involving Eddie in this would have been great.

Just something that shows character development, because up until now all I get is S2/S3 Buck and I've seen that movie before, I want my money back.

I realize this is harsh, and normally, I would stick to the light and fun and ignore the rest, but this had to be said out loud so I can go back to that.

That being said, as I said, I will watch Madney wedding purely for Madney. Anything else is just a bonus. I can't wait for that bachelor party and see wth happens to Chimney.

Happy Monday, my loves. ❤️

[not-goldy]

But isn’t JK sort of "queer cleansing" in Ch 2?

All those women in his MV’s who he had zero chemistry with but not a single reference to being into men (not that I expect that of course, being from a homophobic country. More like being in the closet, unfortunately.. but still).

I think his side of Ch 2 is interesting, based on the past ten years up until the military announcement— which is when this sudden "flipped switch" from disliking/being indifferent about dating women, refusing to sing "girl" in a Jason Derulo cover and being the object of other men’s affection, to singing about boinking women seemed to happen.

If the blurry video wasn’t true, I wonder if BH didn’t rush to clean it up because it kind of worked out to help with JK’s new "ladies man" image 💀💀 His face isn’t even decipherable but at least half the fandom ate that up!

To some extent I guess.

Heteronormativity and queer cleansing are two related but distinct concepts so I hope you are not confusing the two as one and the same in this case.

Heteronormativity in this sense is promoting hetersexuality and images of it as the standard or mainstream idea of something. For instance, what is the purpose of choosing a female lead to play the role of love interest besides the fact that that is just how things are done in the industry??

At this point it doesn't even matter at all the female you cast, it just has to be A female to play the role. It's not political, it doesn't speak to the sexual orientation of the individual, it's just what sells and what is considered the norm or standard way of doing things. You could replace the female subject with an inanimate object and the message of love and affection will not be lost.

Over using female as love interests without allowing for much diversity in music visuals has led to a situation where the woman has become a neutral marker in art. Much like words such as Man or other masculine forms gained neutrality and universality such that where you see man or dude or guy in a text you don't necessarily think they are referring strictly to a man, it's the same for women. They are there because they are expected to be there.

We are not wired to see their presence in MVs as contributing any unique or significant meaning to the story telling.

However seeing two men or two women portrayed as leads and love interests adds a political dimension to the message of the song or story of the MV.

It's why visuals such as Blood Sweat and Tears and the whole visual album of HYYH era speaks to many of us. Other wise they are all men, they can just sit and shout into a mic cos no one wants to see them grope each other- it's gay.

It's also why a producer will tell Tae to find a female to sing a part he wrote for Jimin on his personal song- it wasn't because a female voice was required for the song but simply unconventional for two men to sing a duet of that kind.

That's heteronormativity not queer cleansing.

A cleanse is an intentional act meant to please an audience, to calm their wrath and to portray conformity to the desires of the masses.

Heteronormativity is unconscious biases and decisions that are meaningless in themselves and are done not just to please but for the sheer reason that that is what we know and have come to accept as the norm.

I guess the difference is, did Jungkook have a choice other than choosing a female character for the role? No. To choose a male character for such a role would be so political and revolutionary because it would be going outside the norm.

Having a female lead is just a trend. For straight people, if they want to be "political" they often cast the real object of their affections and discard the paid models and artists. JB did that with his wife and uhm- what's the name of the dude who said his lungs under water but was breathing fire?

Queer cleansing is not just about heteronormativity. Promoting and using women as leads is not necessarily a cleanse.

It's heteronormative because whether he is in Korea or not, whether his country is conservative or not, whether he is gay or not, he would have casted a female as lead because it is expected and normalized.

I mean, why else would they have casted female leads for their mv way back when they were starting out, as young as they were, as young as he was?

Why else would he date a girl when he had no feelings whatsoever for her.

Why else were they made to pick up girls and demonstrate how they would ask a girl out or kiss a girl as entertainment disregarding the fact not all of them might have been into girls.

Let me leave you with this imagery:

Heteronormativity, like right handedness, or able bodiedness is the default setting of society. Manufacturers create products build cars, roads on the assumption that every one is right handed able-bodied straight individual and every thing in society is made to cater to this group bu default.

So sometimes when people create products to cater to the audience we can't say they are making revolutionary statements or even deliberately being discriminatory- they doing so simply because it's how things are done.

Jungkook might simply film an MV that way because that's how things are done in the industry.

I hope in the future he realizes this challenge and goes out of his way to challenge it not because he is queer but because he desires to bring change and uniqueness into the world.

And you are right. There are so many instances of hybe cleaning up his image or putting him through queer cleansing- I just don't think the MV is one of those.

Like I said, even his own fans try to queer cleanse his image by cooking up straight rumors and attacking people to try to suppress and disassociate him from any queer narrative.

And it's a cleanse because they do this with the understanding that portraying him as queer is harmful to his image or reputation or even a threat to his commercial success such as them tearing down his banners and even banning BTS in certain places because they seem "gay" smh

[usertoxicyaoi]

no bc. like. the eighth sense is getting EVERYTHING right.

it's compelling. like. you feel like you KNOW where the storyline is going, what's going to happen next, and then BHAM! NO! something entirely different happens. its never boring. and it makes the wait for the next episode jittery and anxious and it leaves you on tenterhooks BUT THAT'S THE POINT! its meant to leave you guessing. its got this "impending sense of doom" vibe to it that i referred to in a previous post, but that describes the current vibe of jaewon and jihyun's relationship and the atmosphere surrounding it: its thrilling.

characters can breathe!!! and we can breathe with them! jaewon and jihyun are allowed to have scenes where its just them alone, immersed in a hobby that THEY like, and you're there with them! they get to have scenes with so many other people that aren't just with each other. they get to form real relationships with their boss, their therapist, their new and old friends. and each relationship and dynamic brings something new, each dynamic formed between jaewon or jihyun and the people around them is made to allow a certain type of conversation to be had for jaewon and jihyun that they can't really have with someone who isn't that character, for example jihyun can only really openly speak to his boss in the same way jaewon can to yoonwon or his therapist. jihyun can't talk in that same manner to anyone else, nor can jaewon. at the same time, it also soooo BEAUTIFULLY illustrates how performative we can become in certain relationships and situations and around certain people, and how unhealthy and detrimental that can be for us - look at jaewon and taehyung, who are meant to be best friends, but are anything but it.

its such a QUEER show. it takes the small little scenes you'd normally see in a white western heterosexual movie, like the two love interests linking their pinky fingers together to then clasping each other's hands and smiling shyly to the side, to sitting opposite one another on a train and just gazing and gazing and gazing at one another, to calling a taxi after your not-a-date-but-its-so-a-date to go home in and the taxi is literally stood right there waiting but you can't let each other go ..... its taken all those cliche scenes and made them feel so ... new and fresh and vibrant and so so QUEER and any queer person watching the show FEELS those butterflies in their stomach.

oh to see a main character who is asian and queer actually GO TO therapy, and imply that jaewon has been going for 10 whole years to therapy. to have his mental illness be given a name (depression!), to have him talk about his issues so openly!!, to discuss what the struggles of being in your mid-twenties feel like!! to see him talk about how burdensome he finds it being "nice" to everyone and wearing a mask all the time and ultimately his therapist telling him straight that, "in fact, in life, you don't need to be loved by everyone." or when jihyun's boss stood up for him and fought eunji over how she treated him bc she KNOWS jihyun would never bc he isnt a confrontational person, but jihyun's boss did not stand for it, and how she continues to just give him the correct life advice as and when he needs it.

the romance. the chemistry. the way jaewon and jihyun pull you into their bubble. the way you feel the excitement and joy and apprehension and tension and heartache and disappointment between the two of them. YOU feel it. and thats all down to the way the show has been shot and the muuuuusic (oh my god the muuuuusic) and the way the camera is used. it makes it feel personal. in first person. not you watching them, but rather, you BEING them. the way you can FEEL how nervous and anxious jihyun gets when he is in ANY kind of social situation. how you can FEEL the quiet anger and the exhaustion from being so performative and the lack of patience in jaewon like a ticking timebomb when he's around taehyung. you do, you just FEEL it.

anyway. the eighth sense might just be (who am i kidding, it already is) on its way to claim the title for the best bl of 2023, and its only april.

[renamusing]

just watched today's hour long ep and im leaving my thoughts below:

putting aside the fact that the current writers can be complete nonsensical idiots most of the time, there is something pretty suspicious about this whole rebecca plot twist.

first, why kill her if ross says they had split up for a while before she died? if this twist was only to serve ross's comeback story, then they had no need to kill rebecca at all. ross said today that after they split, rebecca had already moved to bristol with seb to stay with her aunt so that would have been that. ross would still have been stupid enough to get into illegal fighting and other criminal activities on his own without the added grief of her death.

second, people are panicking because robert apparently signed the papers so seb could stay with this supposed aunt of rebecca. im sorry, but what else did you expect robert to do? since the moment he went to prison, robert made it a priority to sever himself from aaron. he handed himself in so aaron could have a life of his own, and seb a dad he could one day be proud of, instead of a father on the run for the rest of his life. so i don't believe robert would EVER put seb on aaron if he could avoid it. can you imagine, robert thinking aaron has settled somewhere with a guy living a life of his own just how robert wished, only for robert to saddle him with his kid? yes, for us fans, that wouldn't be selfish because we know aaron would be great with seb, however, the prospect brings up so many questions to me personally, like does robert even know liv died? does he know aaron went to live in italy for a time? does he know aaron came back? we can't even trust victoria to have told robert anything because according to ross victoria hasn't been in contact with robert recently! she hasn't even been in contact with bex and seb, for years! even aaron said they didn't get in touch because they thought rebecca, ross and seb were "happy". which brings me to my third point.

according to today's episode, rebecca died around 3 months ago. who also showed up just around that time? john sugden. im not trying to build a conspiracy theory here—could john's army medic past allow him to perform surgeries in liverpool?? lmao im kidding—what i mean is (and correct me if im wrong), this seems like the time the "new stories" overseen by iain macleod started kicking in. which means they had to cover plot holes from past stories in the least limiting way possible, especially considering the show wouldn't want to spoil robert's return (if ryan does come back) or the fact he isn't coming back at all.

so we don't know if rebecca died before or after victoria called robert to tell him about john like she said she would. we don't know if it was robert who decided not to mention bex's death to vic, or if vic even spoke to robert at all after meeting john.

what im more and more certain of, though, is that seb will play a big part in the story going forward. his predicament as an orphan could:

give vic a plot - because why didn't her brother trust her with his son? could it be because robert thought she already had her hands full with her own kid? or did he think seb would be happier and more comfortable with people he already knew and was familiar with? now that vic's dismal plot with jacob is done, i can see her trying to get some offscreen visiting rights with the bristol auntie, or, in the best case scenario, onscreen seb visits.

give aaron a plot - unfortunately another one that involves john, because being a father is something that aaron always wanted and, depending on who writes this sl, it could have him opening up to john about his and robert's surrogacy attempts. i don't mind it at all, because if robert comes back it will be much juicier if aaron and john are as settled as possible (good luck with that nonexistent chemistry lol), yet i refuse to watch those two bring up seb. period.

an emergency exit to ross - michael parr's interviews have been vague at best. he has talked about doing a short stint and not knowing what the future holds for his character, so if seb doesn't return in the foreseeable, he could well be the reason ross goes away again.

speed up robert's release - yes, robert signed the papers for seb to stay with his aunt in bristol, but i don't doubt he has thought about attempting a new appeal so he could be with his son. legal matters take time and with the lee/luke plot loophole from a few years back, it would only be a case of waiting for ryan to be available.

this seems to be the gist of it to me so far. but i have to mention the one thing that stood out to me today and which i really enjoyed was how calm aaron was through everything except the one moment ross threw the 'slept with his brother' comment in his face. i need 10 more of those, ross. keep them coming!

[koorinokujira]

hello, I can ask for headcanons about how Masamune, Yukimura, Motonari, Saika and Motochika would try to confess their feelings?

Ooooh, yes! Confession imagines were always my jam, so I'm honored to write some myself! I'll try my best, so I hope you enjoy!

♡ Confessions - SB Imagines ♡

You've been close friends for a very long time. Living your lives, fighting alongside each other, and sharing many a laugh together over a nice cup of sake. But neither of you has expressed taking it further just yet, even though the chemistry is undeniable. And so it falls to your dearest friend to make the first move...

♡ Masamune ♡

Masamune is adamant to Kojūrō that he has everything under control. Sure, he's been very distracted lately, not as good in their sparring matches, and keeps zoning out, but everyone has those days, right? Sadly, he defends his actions as of late quite weakly... and when gazing into his Second-in-Command's eyes, he's pretty sure that he wouldn't be convinced even with a strong argument. That man has known him essentially his whole life... he knows when something is up.

Eventually, he sighs and begrudgingly tells Kojūrō what's on his mind. How he's fallen madly in love with you, how his days are so dull when you're not around. And at the end, he leans in closer and whispers, so no one can hear how incompetent he feels because he has no idea how to ask you out. Frustration is writ on his face the whole time he speaks. He can lead his men to battle and turn it into a party of bloodshed... but for some reason, his mind goes blank every time he tries to figure out what to tell you.

Kojūrō is silent the entire time, and his face betrays no sign of the amusement he feels at that moment.

"Why not say the things you've just told me? A proper confession should come from the heart, I believe. This is one of the things I can't help you with, Lord Masamune, as much as it pains me. This is your war to win," is all he says, much to Masamune's disappointment.

Of course he'll leave him to his own devices. Typical Kojūrō, always making sure he is a well-adjusted leader that can take care of himself. Ugh... sometimes he wishes he was just a bit more irresponsible. But that's neither here nor there. He has a war of the heart to go through, and damn it all if he doesn't win it like everything else.

The Dragon spends most of the next day mulling over possibilities. Sure, his confession should come from the heart, but he can't just leave it at that, can he? Just confessing isn't his style. No no no... you both need to have fun. A day that will be great even if you reject him; which is an idea that terrifies him more than he would like to admit. But when he leaves his work to his subordinates for the day and takes his time, he realizes that he has quite a few ideas brewing in his head... and he can't wait for tomorrow.

The next day, everything seems to go exactly the way you want it to. It's kind of suspicious, but you can't put your finger on it. When you go meet Masamune for breakfast, you find yourself gazing at a table full of foods you love. And the Lord has the audacity to act all casual about it, telling you to eat at your heart's content. While you eat, you ask what duties you have for today- you two may be friends, but you still serve the Date clan, after all. His response?

"Don't worry about it."

You look at Kojūrō, who's guarding the room at his usual spot, but the man is as stoic as ever, revealing nothing. So you do as Masamune says... you don't worry about it, digging into your food.

But it doesn't stop there. Whatever you want to do during the day, he seems to be on board with. Sparring with ridiculous rules in place? Sure, that's fun. Riding to the markets and stuffing yourself with sweets? He'll buy you enough so that you even have some for tomorrow. Finally racing your horses against each other like you were planning when younger? Your wishes are his command... and you're 99% sure he let you win. But you're not complaining, it felt good.

And after a day filled with fun, you end up in the gardens of his castle, sitting on the grass with cups of warm sake in hand. Your eyes sparkle with joy in the moonlight, and Masamune knows that he'll remember that look forever, no matter the outcome of this day.

"So..." you finally break the silence, watching how the wind plays with his brown hair. "Want to tell me what this is about?"

"What's what about?" he gives you a cocky grin in response.

"Well... today. It's like we're celebrating something."

He lets out a bark of laughter at that, tilting his head to the side as he pretends to think of a response.

"Well... I suppose we are. Look, don't expect anything awfully sappy from me... but I'm just glad you're here. My lucky seventh claw," he says eventually, his usual mischievous glare giving to a look of sincerity.

Your eyes widen, but before you can even say anything, he speaks again.

"I was thinking a lot about us... you see? About everything we've gone through together. I mean, you've been here almost as long as Kojūrō- and that's a lot. You've seen me act like an absolute idiot, but you never left me behind, even though it probably would have been deserved. And I mean..." he cuts himself off for a moment, his expression turning almost bashful as he struggles to find his words. "Today was fun. And maybe we won't get to do things like this often, maybe not at all. But... every day's a party with you, even if we're both covered in the blood of our enemies. And I... I want it to keep going. I want to enjoy the rest of my life with you next to me, and if all these stupid wars end while we're still around... then I want to make every day that remains a thousand times better than this one."

He takes a deep, shaky breath, letting out a few quiet curses.

"What I mean by that is- do you want it? The wildest adventure we'll ever have? An adventure with... me?"

The Dragon stares at you with his single eye, his breath hitching as he knows that his heart has been laid bare, and thinking that this was probably the worst confession known to man. Your stunned silence certainly doesn't help ease his worries at all.

And then you take his hands into yours, a huge grin plastered on your face.

"Of course."

♡ Yukimura ♡

Yukimura is panicking, and not even trying to hide it by this point.

He told himself, he promised to himself that this week, he'd finally confess to you. And yet, every single day that he wakes up thinking that this is the day... he chickens out the moment he sees you. Your smile... oh, that smile. He loves it, and he's terrified he'll lose it forever if he confesses and you reject him.

That's how it often goes, no? One rejects another, and then the friendship just feels off, which results in both people slowly drifting away from each other. He's seen it before, and the idea of it scares him beyond belief. He can't lose you. But that feeling, that need to be something more than just your friend... it gnaws at his heart even stronger than his fears. He wants to be yours, to stand by your side until you both take your last breaths.

Of course, he tries to ask around about what to do. Sasuke wasn't much help at all. The shinobi simply shrugged and told him to do what feels natural. Not like he would actually know what to do, never having been in a relationship. His Lord wasn't much better. What began as a simple, vague question about how to confess love turned into Lord Shingen telling him about his many romantic escapades from when he was younger. He certainly did not need to hear all that... but it was still somehow better than the advice he got from some of his fellow warriors.

He's on his own. And maybe it's for the best, now that he thinks about it. He just has to find his courage, and it will all go smoothly, right?

...right?

Well, he certainly won't get anywhere by overthinking it and doing nothing. So, he decides to confess when he's the most in his element: during a sparring match.

It's a fight like any other between you two. You hold nothing back, knowing the other can take it. You tend to bring out the best in each other, after all. And you know each other's moves enough by now that it's very easy to prevent serious injury. It's his spears against your trusty blade, sparks flying as they clash. A grin is plastered across your face, while his expression is nothing short of determined.

You're winning.

"I must say, your form is particularly good today!" his gaze never leaves you as he dodges yet another blow from you, an excited glint in those beautiful brown eyes of his. Of course he would exchange pleasantries mid-fight. Typical Yukimura.

"It's the same as always," you quip back once you're sure it's safe for you to talk. "But you seem a bit distracted..."

That seems to give him pause. His face, which was already flush from the physical exertion, changes into a shade of crimson that rivals his clothes.

"Ah, well- um... you could say that I am!" he shakes his head, trying to focus as he attempts a counter attack. "For there is something weighing on my heart!"

His hands shake a bit with a mixture of nervousness and excitement as he seems to gain a new burst of energy. The tables are turning, both in his mind and in the sparring match. But you say nothing, looking at him expectantly as you refuse to let him regain his footing.

"It's difficult to put into words... but there has only been one thing on my mind for the longest time now. And that- that's you! Every time we spar like this, my heart burns even stronger than it used to. Every single moment I get to spend with you makes me forget to breathe because of how... happy it makes me. And every time I look into your eyes I... I get utterly lost!" his words are hesitant at first, but are quickly filled with the fiery passion you know him for. "But I know that even if I feel lost, I always find my way thanks to you! I wish to be more than just your brother in arms, more than your friend..."

Your weapons lock into one another, creating a window through which he looks at you. And you look back at him. Your hair is messy, your faces red, your breathing heavy... and the world seems to revolve around this moment.

"I wish... I wish that I could be yours! You make my heart burn with the brightest flame... and it would be my greatest honor if you decided to feed that flame, until we leave this world."

His voice is quiet by the time he finishes speaking. An innocent plea said by Yukimura himself, not the warrior and leader he tries to be. And as if connected by some invisible link, you both step back, lowering your weapons. The silence that follows is thick with anticipation, and yet... yet those words slip from your mouth as naturally as another breath.

"I want to be yours, too."

♡ Motonari ♡

Motonari is... well, he doesn't even know what he's feeling right now. It's a mix of annoyance and confusion, spiced up by something... awfully warm and fuzzy that he really doesn't want to think about. Love and affection? Pathetic, he is above such trivial notions, he's the Child of the Sun, he-

He's hopelessly in love with the only true friend he has, and has no idea what to do.

Maybe it's how talking to you never felt dull. Maybe it's how you stuck by him with no fear for all these years, not getting caught in a scheme of his even once. Or perhaps it's how... gentle you are to him. Like the time after a devastating loss, when you sat down with him and placed a hand on his shoulder, listening to his frustrations. There's just something comforting about you, something that allows him to feel the things he tends to bury deep in his mind. You make him feel... human. That's probably the best way to put it, as much as he hates that fact.

And now he's at a crossroads. Either he ignores this ever-growing passion in his heart, which would be the harder, yet more logical option for him... or he faces it head-on, and maybe, just maybe, takes things further. Logic against feeling, the comfort of things staying the same fighting the temptation of the unknown.

But in the end, the feelings he has for you win. It's simply too much. And so he decides to confess his feelings, whatever they may be.

Motonari is not a romantic person by any means, and he won't pretend to be. Still, from what he knows, it would make sense for the confession to take place in pleasant circumstances. So he makes sure everything is perfect. Meaning, he orders all his underlings to covertly prepare everything, while he doesn't have to lift a finger. Why wouldn't he take that opportunity, with so many soldiers ready to do his bidding?

Finally, the time comes. The whole day has just been... suspiciously relaxing for you. No planning of strategies, no training, nothing you were used to. You suddenly had time to do some things you were putting off for so long to help ensure the clan is doing well. And everything you wanted was taken care of with the snap of a finger.

Something is afoot.

And the hunch you had was right, which you find out in the evening. You don't eat dinner inside, but instead in the castle gardens. Plenty of comfortable cushions are laid out for you to sit on, there's a lot of good food... and a certain warlord who is attempting to steal sneaky glances at you and failing miserably.

"So... what's the occasion?" you raise an eyebrow at him after a while of silence, gently tilting the cup with your drink from side to side.

"Whatever do you mean?" he responds in that nonchalant, monotone voice of his.

It took you a long time to learn it, but even he has a tell when he lies. The pinky on his right finger tends to twitch subtly anytime something dishonest leaves his mouth. Perhaps that is why he has such long sleeves on his armor. And he's doing it right now. Not even attempting to hide it, either.

"Come on, stop pulling my leg. You don't usually have fancy dinners like this with me... or give me days off," you point out, which makes his shoulders tense up.

He's completely out of his element here, and here you go pointing out something which could be seen as a fault on his side. Well, that does decrease his chances slightly, but he has to keep a cool head if he is to win you over. Even a love confession can be strategic if he tries hard enough, right?

"Ah. I suppose that is true," he gazes off into the distance, looking at nothing in particular, "are you unsatisfied with our current arrangement?"

Your eyes narrow with suspicion at that, but his body language betrays nothing about it being a trick question, so you decide to be honest with him.

"Well... it would be nice to have days like this more often, but we are also at war, so I understand having a lot of work," you shrug. "I doubt our enemies would respect my day off."

"True enough," a ghost of a smile graces his lips, something rarely seen on his face. Is he... amused?

"You still haven't answered my question."

A pause. He looks back at you, his face going back to its stoic, unfeeling facade.

"You are correct... though I suppose I was hoping that diverting your attention to a different topic would make you forget altogether. Alas..." he hums in thought, his eyes never leaving yours. "There is something we must discuss."

Uh oh, that doesn't sound good at all. When people say things like that, it usually means something went wrong, and you know Motonari has no qualms saying what he doesn't like. In detail. So you do the smart thing and simply gesture for him to continue.

"Something has been on my mind for a while now, but it took me a a long time to sort my thoughts out in regards to it. You and me... we have known each other for a long time now. And you know me better than anyone else in my life," he begins, shifting a bit so he faces you more with his entire body. "I used to find that fact quite unnerving. After all, such knowledge can be quite dangerous. But lately, my opinion has been changing. I do not mind it as much anymore. Or you in general. I suppose I have gotten used to you by now. Enough that I find your presence... pleasant, I suppose."

You open your mouth, but no words come out as you stare at him in stunned silence. Motonari being nice? Or, as nice as Motonari can be, that is. And what's worse, his hands are completely still, and nothing else betrays any hint of dishonesty. But seeing your shock, he clears his throat and quickly clears his throat, trying to save the situation despite words of affection not being his forte.

"What I mean to say is... a long time has passed since I simply saw you as yet another valuable asset. You have become a trusted companion, as strange it is for me to say. And in the past few months, you have made me feel- different. It terrifies me, because no matter what I try, I can't seem to get these feelings under control. And yet... it's very pleasant, and I find myself giving into them more and more often," his brows suddenly furrow as he attempts to explain his feelings to you. "It's like happiness, but it goes further. It feels better than when something goes exactly as planned... or when I triumph over you in shogi. Better than- anything else I can think of, I suppose. And it only happens when I'm with you."

He gazes at the starry sky, suddenly seeming strangely vulnerable.

"To put it simply... I would like to try something new. To be... more to you, and for you to be more to me. No more schemes, no more... facades. I want us to trust each other fully. And maybe, just maybe- do more than trust. You have shown me that there is an array of emotion that I have no clue about, and I think it's time for me to... research into that. Learn. Live," he seems almost hesitant as he looks back at you for the last time. "Perhaps there is a place for the both of us under the sun's glorious rays... what do you think?"

It takes a bit for you to process everything he said. He has just confessed that he has feelings- dare you say, love - for you. In the most Motonari way possible, of course, but you can't help but find it endearing. It is true, you know him better than anyone. But that goes both ways, and despite his strange habits and almost sadistic satisfaction he seems to get when he beats you at board games... you appreciate him a lot, too. There is something exciting about the prospect of getting to know the real him and just... being close. And besides, who can say no to a mutually beneficial agreement?

"I think there is... so let's see where this path leads us. I accept."

♡ Magoichi ♡

When Magoichi realizes she's in love with you, it gives her pause. Not that such feelings are unwelcome, on the contrary; it is simply an odd feeling. She tends to keep herself detached, focused on the task ahead so she can be the best leader of the Saika Faction she can. But it seems that even someone seemingly cold like her has her own weaknesses.

And oh, does she have one for you.

How could she not? You were by her side since you were only children, and you never left her behind. Whether she was was having the best time of her life or mourning those she had lost, you were an ever-present companion that she could share her life with without being worried. And she offered the same to you, though she was never all that great at it. That kind of trust is hard to come by, especially in these dark times, and she never took it for granted.

But now, she is faced with feelings much deeper than close friendship. Love seems like a very pleasant feeling so far, and it helps that you seem like you could even be receptive to it, were she to confess. And yet...

She hesitates.

Would it be a good idea for her to do such a thing? What if she neglects her duties too much? What if the attachment to you becomes a burden instead of the pillar she leans upon when she needs companionship? What if it hinders your ability to do your job? Neither of you can afford such a thing, not when there's a war raging everywhere around you and you need to stay vigilant.

However, that's only the logical part of her mind. The part that's slowly but surely getting overshadowed by that pleasant, fuzzy feeling in her chest. The loud thumping of her heart whenever you flash that grin of yours after a job well done. When you tell her about something you love and your eyes light up than the stars she sees every night. When she returns from patrol, only to find you snoring soundly on your mat in the most adorable way possible.

She weighs down her options, and eventually figures that keeping her feelings bottled up would be much worse. She's had enough of that, and you... you've convinced her, at least partly, that even she deserves affection. Besides, she's let you this close already, it can't be much worse.

She doesn't fuss over the confession itself much; Magoichi is a straight-forward, practical woman. She knows that saying it how it is in a relaxed situation is more than enough. And she wouldn't even know how to confess in a romantic way without sounding like an idiot- or a certain poetic vagabond with more feathers in his hair than sense in his head. Ugh.

So she does exactly that. On a fairly uneventful day, she invites you to go on patrol with her, as she often does. She knows she can count on you having her back. And just like any other time, it doesn't take long for a conversation to start. It's mostly you talking and her listening, a preferred arrangement between the two of you. She watches intently as your lips curl up into an amused smile while you tell her a joke you heard from one of your fellow Crows.

Magoichi is so lost in your expression, in fact, that she almost forgets to react, resulting in a somewhat delayed snort and amused roll of the eyes.

"Of course he'd say something like that... not surprised," she shakes her head, and only a pleasant silence follows right after.

It's late in the afternoon, and the sun is just now remembering that it's supposed to set, casting everything in a warm orange hue. Dirt and grass crunches around your feet as you walk, and you can hear a few birds chirping here and there. It's wonderful, and you can't help but take sneaky glances at the gorgeous landscape around you both.

"You know, I wanted to talk to you about something," she hums after a while, and slows her steps into an eventual stop.

You stop next to her, wordlessly gesturing for her to continue. The fearless leader of the Saika Faction doesn't respond immediately, however. Instead, she takes a deep breath and looks out into the distance, suddenly feeling incredibly awkward.

"Look, I won't mince words here, or I'll probably say something ridiculous," she turns back to you, crossing her arms in a seemingly relaxed manner. "Lately, I've been thinking... and I realized that you started to mean even more to me than before. I always cared about you, even if I wasn't great at expressing it. And I know you know that. But lately... it's been different for me. You smile at me and I suddenly feel like a mess-"

She cuts herself off for a moment, shaking her head again with a tiny scoff at herself. It's clear that this is a bit new to her. A bit unnerving, even.

"I guess I just fell for you, and I don't know what to do with myself except telling you. And I'm kind of hoping you feel the same. That you want to hold my hands and... tell me that you love me, just like I want to do the same for you. Right now, there's nothing that I want more, even though part of me feels stupid for saying all that," she smiles awkwardly. "...what do you say?"

But you know you don't need to say much. All it takes is taking her hand in yours, gently intertwining your fingers... and saying what has been on your mind for the longest time as well.

"I love you too."

♡ Motochika ♡

It takes Motochika an awfully long time to realize that his feelings for you run a bit deeper than regular friendship. It has nothing to do with his intelligence, nor lack of perception. He might be an intimidating warlord and an intimidating pirate, but no one could deny the size of his heart when it comes to all those he considers friends. And his crew? His crew is family. One that you're a very important part of. So, him showering you with affection and absolutely adoring you has always been par for the course.

But lately, his own feelings have been a bit of a mystery to him. It wasn't like there was anything wrong, per se. He was content, happy, even! Sailing the seas, being a menace and searching for treasure with his crew... it's all a sea wolf like him can ask for, war be damned. And yet, there was something strange, something tugging on his heartstrings. He even thought he was sick at one point, before he realized how silly that was. And through a mixture of pondering and talking it over with some of the other crew members, he slowly realizes that the source of that odd feeling is none other than you.

And that brings us to know. The poor man is in love, and now that he knows it, it's gotten even worse. Oh, how he wishes to scoop you up into his arms and never let go, to sit with you on the deck and stargaze when everyone is asleep, fall asleep while holding you every night and wake up the same way every morning... it's driving him insane. But he wants to do this right, to earn your love.

The problem is, he has no idea where to even begin.

He absolutely refuses to court you like some stupid, snobby lord from the mainland. That would probably just scare you off, anyway. You're made of sterner stuff, just like him. Maybe he could hunt down a shark for you? Impressive, sure, but kind of weird, so no. The treasure you have is shared by all of the crew, so it's not like giving you any of that would mean much, either. But he wants to do something for you, give you something, something that comes from the heart...!

Ah. He's got it. He'll do something he's never done before.

When the ship makes small stop on land the next day, he lets everyone do as they please (like always, anyhow), and disappears without telling anyone. Even you're none the wiser about where he went, but you're not particularly worried about him. He knows how to take care of himself. Most of the time, at least.

But unbeknownst to you, he went to a somewhat secluded beach nearby. And with no one to observe and possibly spoil the surprise, he starts gathering seashells. Big ones, small ones- as long as he finds them beautiful, he takes them, and slowly builds a decent collection. He wraps it all in a cloth, tucking it into a small pouch he currently has on his hip, before he slinks back to you and the others.

Later that night, he sheepishly approaches a member of his crew; a scrawny, cheery young man named Teruo, who has a bit of a knack for everything concerning jewelry. Collecting, and even making various trinkets is his hobby, which makes him a fairly valuable member of a team when the crew needs to make a bit more money. But this time, the infamous Sea Devil approaches him for a different purpose.

He wants to make a necklace for you... using the shells he collected.

Obviously, he doesn't really know much about that sort of handiwork. His hands are great at fishing, swinging his anchor around to defeat terrified enemies... rough work, nothing as gentle as this. But he wants to learn. He wants to put an effort into making something for you. Something that you will appreciate and will hopefully look as good on you as he imagines. And when his dear aniki explains the situation, how can Teruo refuse to help?

And so begins a long, frustrating night full of cursing, some broken seashells, and unwavering effort of a pirate that's hopelessly in love. By the time he's done, he's certain it's almost morning, so he decides to at least take a short nap. He doesn't even bother to go back to his cabin. He just slumps down in the corner on the hard wooden floor, gently clutching the newly made necklace in his right palm.

He doesn't sleep for long, though. He's used to waking up around sunrise, and his biological clock doesn't disappoint this time, either. So he sleepily gets out of Teruo's tiny cabin (not without muttering an apology for bothering him the entire night, though), and walks back up on the deck. And as luck would have it...

...he spots you.

You're standing there, letting the wind caress your hair as your arms rest against the ship's railing. You seem content, just staring at the sun as it lazily rises up on the skyline. And if Motochika wasn't in love with you before, then boy is he now. You look utterly perfect to him in the warm orange glow, and like a siren, you've enthralled him yet again, heart and soul.

This is it. There will never be a moment more perfect than this.

He walks up to you casually, stopping right beside you. It takes him a while to speak, as he mentally prepares himself for what he's about to do.

"Enjoying the sunrise?" he asks as he hides the necklace behind him, his other hand moving to rest on his hip.

"Mhm."

Your response sounds a bit absent-minded, but that's mostly because you're still a bit sleepy. You're enjoying the sunrise, but paying attention to him, too.

"I get it. No better view of the sky than from the deck of a ship, with wind in your hair and the smell of the sea right at your nose..." he hums in approval, before his voice slips into a soft murmur. "Anyway... wanted to tell you something."

That tears your gaze from the gorgeous scenery, and brings it to his face. His brown eyes are filled with a strange tenderness, while the rest of his face remains somewhat stoic. You know the look... he has something important to say, but he'll probably say it with that endearing sincerity of his.

"So... we've known each other for what feels like forever, huh? Sailing the seas, having an adventure wherever the wind takes us... it's been fun. Great having you by my side through all that," he gives you a sincere, yet somewhat awkward grin. "But you know... I've been thinking a lot lately. About us, I mean. And I realized you mean a lot more to me than I thought you did. Not that you weren't one of my favorites before- you're the backbone of this crew at this point. But I guess I caught myself wanting... more."

There's a short pause, and you can clearly see the momentary realization in his eyes that he's really doing this, and there's no going back from it.

"What I want to say is... I... love you. A lot. And I want- I hope that maybe, we could be more than what we are now. More than a Captain and his right hand. I want you to be my partner in crime. Well, not just in that, but in everything," he rubs the back of his head to soothe his nervousness. "And to show you it's not just words, and I really mean it, I made something for you."

He finally reveals the necklace. It's actually pretty well made for his first try. A bit crude in some places, but clearly made with love. There's even a few silver beads dividing the various seashells to spice things up a bit.

"I know, not the best accessory in the world... but I worked hard on it. Picked out some shells I thought you'd like and put it together, even though it was kind of frustrating," he chuckles awkwardly. "...do you like it?"

You take the necklace from him, admiring it for a few more moments. Maybe it's not the most beautiful piece of jewelry, but he made it for you. Just for you. That's enough to make your heart beat like crazy. You care for him a lot too, more than you were comfortable with admitting before. And when you see the puppy eyes he's giving you now, you can't help but feel that maybe it's time to let yourself feel that love, let it out.

Without a word, you fall into his arms, and he catches you in time.

"I don't like it. I love it. But not more than you."

---

Woo! It's done! After such a long wait, I'm finally back with another finished request. This one was kind of daunting, to be honest... but I think I did okay! Despite all the obstacles, I finished these silly scenes, and I'm super proud! And that leaves only one more request in my backlog.

Thanks for your patience, and that you read my stories, it means a lot to me.

And as always...

Have an amazing day!

[limehaspassed]

Hello! I love your work so I wanted to request this.

I have afew slasher OBSESSIONS! But at the moment Thomas is my biggest one.

I see many stories of the slashers being so excited for having lil ones. It warms my heart so big VwV

However I've been thinking alot on the scenario of "what if for some reason a child can't be had?"

With Thomas being such a family man... would he no longer want s/o if they can't have a child or maybe don't want them? Would they find another way? Or maybe just be happy with just having eachother for the rest of their lives?

It can be a sad thought, ik. But for ppl that for one reason or another cant and/or don't want lil ones... how would Thoman (or others) respond to this?

I very much need this if you're willing to do it.

Thank you so kindly either way ^w^

Unprecedented

(Thomas x F!Reader)

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In which Thomas Hewitt wants try for a baby, a wish that can never be granted.

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Diagnosed Issue

The doctor has diagnosed you with infertility, a fact that ruined any image you had of having a baby.

For a while, you went without really caring, your mind more focused on meeting bills and moving out to Texas to a family home you inherited from your father, who had passed recently.

You had no little time to think about the baby situation until you moved to Texas and met the Hewitt’s boy, Thomas. It was here that you fell in love and ended up moving in, finding a home within the Hewitt family.

For a while you and Thomas live happily together but eventually he begins to ask about a baby, seeing as he is a rather big family guy himself.

The very mention of a baby sets you off and you bawl your eyes out because you did in fact want a baby with Thomas. You wanted your own family with him but you couldn’t have it. The words of the doctor rung louder than ever the day Thomas asked you.

It took you a while to calm down before you could tell Thomas, before you could inform him that you couldn’t have a baby. He was perplexed at the situation at first but after you explained why, he understood.

He was deeply saddened but understanding, rubbing your back softly as you cried about how sorry you were for not being able to conceive.

Yes Thomas was saddened and disheartened but he didn’t hold it against you. You were glad he didn’t hold it against you.

It would take both of you a while to get used to the news but you had each other and that’s all that really matters now.

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Want Issue

You had been living with the Hewitt family for a few years now. Within those few years, you’ve grown particularly close to Thomas, the adopted son of Luda.

The two of you had an open and honest relationship, one that you both strived to make as happy and healthy as possible.

Naturally, sense there is so much love and chemistry built up between the two of you, Thomas brings up the idea of having a baby with you.

You’re first instinct is no. You don’t want a baby, you never have because it was simply a burden you didn’t want to carry.

Thomas feels rejected by this, his dream crushed because all he’s ever wanted was a baby that he could raise as his own. Of course, he believes he won’t be the best parent but he wants to try and he’s confused on to why you don’t want one.

For a while, he goes about and tries to convince you but you deny him each time. You eventually start feeling bad but you stand firm.

After a few days of failed convincing, Thomas decides to drop the subject and refuses to mention it anymore. If you try and bring it up to apologize, he’ll shrug it off and physically remove himself from the room.

You don’t know what to do because Thomas also begins distancing himself. You want him to be happy but you don’t want a baby. It causes a rift to form between the two of you.

You ended up finding a baby kitten along the side of the road and adopted it, allowing Thomas to have a “baby” without having an actual child to take care of.

Thomas was iffy about it at first but grew fond of the little cat and quickly grew into an excellent cat father. You were the mother but you allowed Thomas to be the main parental figure, seeing as you never wanted a child in the first place. However, if Tommy asked you to hold the kitten for a while, you wouldn’t object.

After all, the kitten wasn’t so bad.

Thomas became more vocal and close after that, as if a breath of fresh life had washed over him. You were glad he was feeling back to normal and he was smiling again.