#I don’t usually react like. visibly to stuff that I watch but I gasped like several times

[liorlenn]

just saw the new dove attia musical (moliere) and um.

[mypoisonedvine]

𝙼𝙴𝙴𝚃 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙼𝚄𝙽𝚂𝙾𝙽𝚂 - chapter 3: louder than hell.

𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢 - living with eddie continues to have its ups and downs, but maybe you two can find an understanding. or, maybe not.

𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝 - 5.3k

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 - mentions/description of deceased parents, descriptions of drug use/smoking, mentions/description of hard drug abuse and overdose, ridiculous sibling arguments, fluff and wholesomeness and excessive transcription of scenes from a real episode of the partridge family

You groaned as you wiped your forehead with the back of your hand, a thin sheen of sweat having formed from all the effort you’d been putting into trying to clean your room.

Eddie had all but trashed the place, random junk all over every surface; he seemed to have a habit of setting something down the first spot he could find when he was done and just leaving it there.  When you told him to clean up, he usually ignored you— or pretended not to hear you since he either had headphones on to listen to a tape or was practicing his deafening guitar— so you’d gotten into a habit of doing it yourself.  You were on your knees on the ground now, trying to separate the dirty clothes, unfinished homework, and trash into three different piles.

“Liquor store receipt, trash,” you mumbled to yourself.  “First page of an essay about… General Custer?  Homework.  I mean, kind of trash but… technically homework.”

You made your way around the room, eventually getting to clear off your desk and vanity; of course, when he got home from Hellfire, you were doing the one thing you didn’t want him to catch you doing— thinning out the shelf of albums.  You were in the middle of pulling one of his records out when he slammed his hand over it to push it back in.  “Hey!” he yelped, glaring at you.  “Don’t touch my stuff!”

“My room, my stuff,” you replied, trying to pull another record out, but he grabbed your hand this time which startled you.

“Our room,” he corrected, “my albums.  No touchy.”

“Your records are crowding mine!” you explained.  “There’s no room!”

“Yeah?  Your records are tainting mine!” he replied indignantly.  “I mean, Escape and Frontiers I’ll forgive, Journey has a few bangers but come on— your Make It Big next to my Animalize is criminal.  It’s going to infect it with its… suckiness, somehow.”

“Okay, I’m gonna stop you there because George Michael is a god,” you sneered, “that your little pea brain simply can’t comprehend!”

“George Michael is a hack!” he spat back, and you gasped— like he’d put out his cigarette on a statue of baby Jesus or something.  Except that this was infinitely worse.

“You take that back,” you ordered.

“Prove me wrong,” he offered instead, “or admit you just think he’s hot and don’t even care about the music.”

“Oh— oh!” you yelped, laughing in pure frustration as you turned and knelt down in front of the stacks of records.  “I’ll prove you wrong.”

“I swear, if you try to make me listen to Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go—” he began to warn you.

“No, no way,” you shook your head, “we’re listening to his masterpiece.”

The drums started, and already Eddie was trying to turn the record player off.

“No,” you insisted— not quite a bark, but very stern— as you grabbed his arms.  He stilled and looked at you again, swallowing as your fingers dug into the sleeves of his jacket.  “Just listen.  Wait for the bass line.”

It came in a second later.  You watched his face as he listened: he didn’t react too visibly, but you waited in anticipation for him to be forced to eat his words.

“Somebody told me—” the lyrics began, in George’s beautiful voice, and you saw Eddie’s eyes narrow.  The bass was more prominent as the first verse continued, and you smiled as Eddie nodded slightly.

“Okay, that’s…” he trailed off, smiling as he met your gaze.  “That’s actually kinda sick.”

“I know!” you agreed.  

“Man, that bass with some guitars would be so good!” he whined.  “Why did he have to make pop and not metal?  He would’ve been amazing.”

“He is amazing,” you frowned.

“Fair enough,” Eddie nodded.  “I don’t know about a god but, sure, he’s pretty good.”

“Thank you,” you mumbled as you reached to take the needle off the record, but his hand suddenly landed on your wrist.  

“Uh, you don’t— um, have to turn it off so fast,” he stammered, and you smiled.

“Do we have a new Wham!-head on our hands?” 

He scoffed.  “No way.  Just giving them a fair shake is all— after this song’s over I wanna play you something by Poison that I think you’ll like…”

Your mom pulled her translucent shawl up over her shoulders as she stepped out onto the porch.

"Have her back by eleven, mister," Eddie wagged his finger at Wayne, who chuckled along with your mom as they walked down the steps together.

He waved one more time before shutting the door, and letting out a quick breath as he turned to look at you.

"We throwin' a rager or what?" he prompted.

"A rager that ends by eleven?" you raised an eyebrow, though you didn’t look up at him for more than a second from where you sat on the couch— you were too busy reading Persuasion for far from the first time.

"I was just kidding," he smiled, "but next time we'll get them to stay out all night so we can really do something."

"I don't like the idea of them out all night," you shuddered, focusing on the book in front of you— but of course, you couldn’t really focus with him bothering you still.

"Don't be a prude, they're engaged," he crossed his arms.  "It's not like they haven't—"

"Stop," you groaned.

"It upsets you that much?" he laughed.

"I'm not saying they're not allowed to do it, I'm just saying I don't want to think about it."

“Then just be thankful their bedroom’s on the other side of the house from ours,” he grinned as he hopped over the arm of the couch to sit next to you.  You scooted further away.

“They should be, too; they don’t have to hear you snore,” you returned, still looking at your book as you turned the page.  Unfortunately, after that, you had one of those thoughts that, once you had it, you had to ask.  “Oh god,” you groaned, looking up from your book and grimacing slightly at him, “my mom stayed over at your place some nights, didn’t she?”

“Yeah,” Eddie shrugged.

“You didn’t… hear them…” you trailed off, widening your eyes and leaning your head forward a bit.

“What, fuck?” Eddie laughed.  “No— when Wayne was bringing her over he’d let me know in advance and I would… find other lodgings for the evening.  You know, give ‘em some space, crash at Rick’s or something.”

“How… considerate,” you offered, though it was mostly sarcastic.  You didn’t like imagining this ‘gentleman’s agreement’ Eddie and Wayne had concerning your mother.

“I mean, that’s just common courtesy,” Eddie smirked, “you know— when the trailer’s a-rockin’, don’t come a-knockin’, and all that.”

“Gross,” you frowned.

“He’d do the same for me,” Eddie explained.

“If you were actually getting any,” you added.

“Well,” Eddie clarified, “if I had a girlfriend, I mean.”

“Oh,” you grinned, “so you don’t just bring any girl back to the trailer, huh?”

He snorted.  “No, definitely not.”

“Because she’d turn and run as soon as she saw how filthy that place was?”

“Hey,” he frowned, “it wasn’t filthy… there was just a mild griminess.”

There was a long pause, but it was only awkward for one of you— he was rubbing his hands on his jeans and looking around while you paid attention to your book again, hardly noticing he was there anymore.

“So, what are we doing tonight?” he wondered.

“We?” you repeated.

“I mean, house to ourselves has to be good for something.”

“You better not smoke any fucking pot,” you snapped.

“That was only one of my ideas,” he smirked.  “You’ve really never smoked?”

“I never said that,” you mumbled, and you saw him peer at you over the top of your book with a glimmer in his eyes.

“Oh, I wanna know that story,” he pleaded.  “Was it high school?  Wait, did Rick sell you stuff?”

“No, and no,” you sighed.  “It doesn’t matter.”

“Matters to me!” he insisted.

“So do a lot of things that don’t actually matter,” you shrugged.

His finger hooked around the top of your book, in the spine’s crease, and he pulled it down to meet your unamused stare.  “C’mooooon,” he whined, “I’m curious what occasion would make a good girl like you decide to get stoned.”

“It was after I broke up with Gary,” you explained, sighing as you shut your book and set it down.  He pulled his legs up onto the couch like he was waiting for some juicy, riveting story.  “I went to a party with some people from my Intro to English class.”

He blinked at you as he waited.  “And?”

“And, we smoked.”

“Oh my god!” he groaned, his head falling back dramatically.  “That’s so boring!  You skipped the good part.”

“What good part?”

“Why you did it,” he answered.

“I wanted to fit in, I guess?  They were passing it around, I felt weird being the only one not smoking.”

“Did you cough?”

“Of course I did,” you rolled your eyes, “I’m not a professional pothead like you.”

“Hey, I’m cutting back,” he defended, raising his hands defensively.  “Just nights and weekends now.”

“Just— just nights and weekends?!” you repeated.  “So… what?”

“So, I don’t get stoned at school anymore,” he explained confidently.

“Wow,” you congratulated flatly, “better start writing your valedictorian speech.”

“Don’t need to be the best, unlike some of us who are terminally competitive,” he grumbled, “just need to graduate.  Sick of being in fucking high school.”

“I’m sure,” you nodded.

“Is college cool?” he wondered.  “Like, are the people chill?”

“Uh, I guess…” you shrugged.  Not that that’s something you need to be worrying about with your grades.

“Do you have any friends?” he asked, point blank, and you kicked him semi-lightly in the side.  

“Shut up!” you frowned.

“Okay, that’s a no,” he widened his eyes as he looked away.

“I mean, I have friends,” you disagreed, “just not like, close friends?  I guess?”

“You never have anybody over,” he recalled.  “And you never call anybody.”

“Not when you’re home,” you corrected.  “I can’t ‘cause you’re always on the fucking line with your Hellfire pals.”

“You could talk to them!” he offered.  “Might be the only chance some of them would get to talk to a girl at all.”

“Yeah, I’m good,” you rolled your eyes.  “Believe it or not, I’ve kind of outgrown high schoolers.  Unlike some of us who are terminally immature.”

“Aw, look at us,” he clicked his tongue, tilting his head as he smiled at you.  “The witty repartee, the flinging of insults— this is better than throwing a party.”

You groaned and pulled up your book again, opening it to where you’d left off.  “Okay, I’m done,” you mumbled.

“If you say so,” he shrugged, but he was smiling mischievously.

“In fact, now that I know it’s fun for you, I’m never arguing with you again,” you decided.  “Conversation over.”

“Don’t say that,” he pouted, but there was a dark shine to his stare as he continued.  “You know it’s never over with us, sweetheart.”

You really, really hoped he couldn’t see the way you shivered when he said that…

Before you could worry about how to respond, he got up— your eyes couldn’t help but follow him, lingering on the bandana dangling out of his back pocket— before he turned around and you shot your eyes back to the pages of your book.  Why is he so distracting now, just standing there?  I can’t even tell if this book is in English anymore, I swear it was before…

“I’m gonna practice guitar,” he informed you.

“Not while I’m trying to read, you’re not,” you frowned.  “That thing is so goddamn loud—”

“Acoustic,” he explained with a small, condescending smile.  “Won’t offend your delicate little ears.”

“Great,” you hummed in reply, and he disappeared back into your shared bedroom as you focused in on your book again.

You could just barely hear him, but it wasn’t so bad, so you didn’t shout for him to shut the door.  He tinkered around with a few songs, none of which you thought much of until halfway into his practice.  Your mind was so occupied with reading Jane Austen that you didn’t even really consciously realize that you were listening to the riff he was playing, or that you recognized it in the back of your mind.

You didn’t even notice that you were quietly singing along.

“Wouldn’t it be nice if we were older,” you mumbled, “then we wouldn’t have to wait so long…”

The music stopped, and you swallowed as you realized you’d sung; his head popped out of the doorway, smiling wide.  “You have a nice voice,” he offered.

“Sorry,” you cleared your throat, “I didn’t— I wasn’t trying to interrupt.”

“Don’t worry about that,” he smiled, setting the guitar down against the wall and stepping up to the couch.

“I’m surprised you know that song,” you admitted.

“It was one of the first ones I learned,” he recalled.  “My mom really liked The Beach Boys.”

You glanced down awkwardly; you were pretty sure he wasn’t using the past tense because she stopped liking the band…

“Sing along to whatever you want,” he offered.

“N-no, I’ll just keep reading,” you decided.  “But you can keep playing… you can play here if you want.”

“Really?”

You shrugged, and he grabbed the guitar by the neck, sitting down and setting it up in his lap oncemore.

You only recognized a couple more songs after that— Hotel California, Tangerine by Zeppelin, and You Can’t Always Get What You Want— but didn’t sing along to any of them.  Occasionally, you heard him humming the melody or mumble-singing the lyrics, and you smiled to yourself.

After a while, you weren’t even reading anymore, just listening.

You furrowed your brow as you listened to him singing something, only able to make out a few words.  Something about she’s so lovely and she’s so fine and take me home— pretty vague, could be anything.

“What song is that?” you finally asked.

“O-oh,” he choked, “um, I wrote that one, actually.”

“You write your own songs?” you realized, impressed.  He shrugged.  “Is that what Corroded Coffin plays?”

“Oh— not this one,” he shook his head, “too sappy.  But yeah, sometimes we play stuff I wrote.”

“That’s cool,” you smiled.  “Is it about a girl?”

“Let’s talk about something else,” he blurted out suddenly.

“Aw, come on,” you teased, “it is, right?  Is it about a specific girl, or just… a hypothetical girl?”

He laughed a little.  “Um, a real one.”

You raised an eyebrow.  “Did you guys ever go out?”  You tilted your head when he scoffed and looked away.  “Really?  Maybe if you played her the song, she would’ve wanted to go out.”

“Does that work?” he wondered, looking at you again.

“I mean, seems to work on most girls,” you shrugged.  “She’ll forget that the guy’s a total dog or a douche or just a good old fashioned loser— so long as he’s a sexy guitar player or whatever.”

“Which one of those am I?” he laughed.

“All of the above,” you decided, “except sexy.”

Of course, one instance of Eddie practicing quietly couldn’t last.  The next day, he was back to the abrasive, headache-inducing squeals of his electric guitar on the amp, impossible to block out even as you covered your ears and put all your mental effort into studying.  Finally, when you were frustrated with trying to ignore it, you stood up defiantly from your seat at the kitchen table and marched across the hallway.

You swung the bedroom door open, hit with a wave of even louder sound, and the sight of him strumming quickly— his head was hung low at first, though it fell backward as he continued and you could see that his eyes were closed.  

“Hey!” you barked.  “Eddie!”

He was still playing, starting to rock his head back and forth and sending his hair flying every which way.

“Munson!  Pencildick!” you tried to get his attention, but you couldn’t even hear yourself with how loud it was.  “COULD YOU TURN IT DOWN?!” you screamed.  He either couldn’t hear you still or was simply ignoring you; you stormed across the room, interrupting his headbanging, and grabbed the neck of the guitar tightly.  The sounds came to a literal screeching halt, leaving only the ambient buzzing of the amp to fill the air.

“Hey!” he defended.  “I was shredding.”

“Yeah, shredding my eardrums,” you spat.  “I’m trying to study.  I have a test coming up.”

“Oh wow, big photography test?” he rolled his eyes.  “What studying do you have to do, making sure you know which button actually takes the picture?”

“No, it’s for my math class,” you frowned, “now could you please keep it down!”

“This is just the volume of metal, my dear,” he sighed, “can’t help you, sorry.”

You groaned as you turned around, kneeling quickly to find the volume knob on his amp and spin it to the left.

“Damn it!” he snapped, bending down and turning it back.  “What did I tell you about touching my stuff?”

“Do it more ‘cause you love it so much?” you guessed.

“First my records, then you grab my guitar, now the amp?” he sneered.  “Is nothing sacred?  How would you like it if I touch your stuff?”

You thought it was a hypothetical until he took the guitar off over his shoulder and set it down, the motion making a slightly-melodic buzz come out of the speaker.  He stormed across the room to your closet, throwing it open as you tried to reach around him to stop him.  “Get out!” you whined as he dug around through your clothes, taking a pink dress off the hanger and tossing it over his shoulder.  “Hey!”

He found another dress, a black one, and he snickered at it.  “Cute,” he decided before throwing it, too.  You ran to try to pick up your clothes from the floor, but when you turned back to look at him, he was holding onto your stuffed bear.

“Don’t touch that,” you warned him.

“Who’s gonna stop me?” he grinned.

You ran up to him and reached for it, but he held it up high above his head and watched you struggle with a proud smile.  "Eddie, give it back!" you whined, jumping up to try to grab it.

"Nuh uh," he laughed.

"Stop!" you groaned.

"You can come get it for yourself, sweetheart," he taunted, knowing you couldn't reach.  When you almost managed to grab it, he held you back with his free hand to keep you away.

"Just give it back, Eddie," you begged, starting to get really upset, "my dad gave me that!"

He brought his arm down in a split second, and you snatched the bear from him to hug it to your chest.  "I'm sorry," he said instantly, clearing his throat and looking around sheepishly.  "I didn't know… I was just trying to— I didn't know."

You sniffled a little, and he looked at you again, eyebrows tilted with a guilty, almost pleading look.  "It's okay," you assured quietly.  "Just don't take my stuff anymore, please…"

"I won't, I swear," he promised.

You nodded, resting your chin on Barry's head.  Eddie sighed a little, looking at you more gently than you could ever remember him looking at you before.

"How old were you when your dad…?" he asked quietly.

"Twelve," you answered.  "He got sick when I was eleven, but he died a week before I turned thirteen."

"That's a hard time for that," he nodded.  "Not that there's any good time for that but, damn, thirteen is hard enough."

You widened your eyes and blew out a breath as if to say, yeah, no shit.

"I wish I had my mom that long, though," he added, and you looked up at him.  He scratched behind his ear for a second, looking off to the side and staring at your wall.  "I was nine."

"Was she sick?" you wondered.

"Yeah, something like that," he sighed.  "She got better for a while— for me— but she started using again, she didn't know her limits… I found her, actually, and she still had the needle in her arm."

"Oh, god," you breathed, "Ed, I'm so—"

"Don't worry about it," he shrugged, looking at you again and wearing a more familiar, playful expression on his face.  "I got to go live with my dad after that, and he was buckets of fun.  It was like summer camp with the Boy Scouts, but less knots and more crime."

You snorted a small laugh through your nose.  "Sounds cool."

"And now that you know my sob story, you can't get on my case for being a delinquent anymore," he grinned.

"But can I still silently judge you?" you pouted.

"Of course," he winked.  "Anyways, point is— sorry for taking the bear.  I guess I just wanted to try out some of the annoying-older-brother classics."

"Don't apologize to me," you suggested, "apologize to him."

You held the bear out with one hand, pointing it right at his face.

"His name is Barry," you informed him, something he could incorporate into his apology.

"I'm sorry, Barry," Eddie spoke to the stuffy, "you were collateral damage in my war on my sister.  Won't happen again.  If you want, I can make it up to you by setting you up with this saucy little throw pillow from the living room—"

You giggled briefly, and Eddie's eyes darted over at you for a second, with a glimmer in them that made your heart skip a beat.

He looked at the bear again.  "We square?" he asked and after a pause, he reached up and pinched Barry's right paw, gently shaking it.

"Give him a kiss," you demanded suddenly, and Eddie crinkled his nose in disagreement.

"Uh, I think the handshake oughta do it—" he began to argue.

"Give. him. a kiss." You wiggled Barry in front of his face a bit, emphasizing your demand.

Hesitating for a second first, Eddie pursed his lips and gave Barry a kiss on the head.  You pulled the bear back into your chest with a smile.  

“I’ll try not to touch your stuff,” you offered.

“I’ll try to keep the music down,” he replied.

“Great,” you sighed, and you slowly turned and left the room, shutting the door behind you.  You grabbed your textbook and took it outside to study on the porch— it was a little warm outside for it, but sunset was coming and you knew it would cool off quickly.  The silence was so precious after all the noise, and you found yourself losing focus on your practice questions so you could admire the way Hawkins looked bathed in fading purple light.  You didn’t love living here all the time, but it had its perks— and really, you weren’t sure if you could ever bring yourself to leave.

Having to tell Eddie about how you got Barry brought the memory to the forefront of your mind— that must’ve been why you dreamed about it that night, about your dad.

Maybe some people who lose a loved one enjoy dreaming about them, it’s like the last way they can see them anymore.  But you hated it; it was easier just to not think about him.  It was easier to pretend none of those happy memories ever happened, so you wouldn’t have to remember the worst ones too— the medications, the hospitals, the surgeries… the deterioration, right before your eyes.

The dream itself was fine, really; it was sweet.  It was waking up that you hated, because for a split second, you forgot.  And you had to remember all over again that your dad fucking died when you were still just a little kid.

Barry was the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes, by your pillow, and you grabbed him as you sat up to go do something other than lay here and cry. 

Of course, when you sat up, your head slammed into the fucking bunk beds again.  You crinkled up your face, more from the frustration than the pain, and let a little fuck slip out as you held your forehead.

Still, you ducked down and got out of bed, navigating your way to the living room.  You glanced at the clock— 1:17 AM.  Something’s probably still on, you thought to yourself.  You grabbed the remote and the folded blanket off of the couch’s back, throwing it over yourself as you flipped it on and turned the volume down to something quiet enough for the wee hours of the morning.

Yes, something was still on— after flipping a couple channels, you found something funny and comfortable to hopefully lull you back to sleep, and you adjusted yourself on the couch as you cuddled up with Barry.

Maybe it was the TV that woke him up, or your head injury on the underside of his bed, or maybe just his instinct to show up and bother you at all times; regardless, within a few minutes, you heard the bedroom door open again.  Eddie’s shadow moved through the dark until you could just barely see him in the light of the screen, sporting his classic pajama combo of soft plaid pants and his necklace and nothing else.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked quietly.  You shook your head, pulling the blanket up higher on your chest.

He sighed a little, crossing the room and standing at the end of the couch— he made a little shooing motion until you moved your feet out of the way and he could plop himself down by your scrunched up legs.

“Whatcha watchin’?” he asked.

“Partridge Family rerun,” you shrugged.

He laughed a little.  “You were totally in love with David Cassidy when you were a little girl, weren’t you?  Shoulda known.”

“Dude, I never stopped loving David Cassidy,” you snorted.  “That’s my man.”

“Uh huh,” he grinned.  “And does Detective Sonny Crockett know about this?”

You smirked.  “He understands.  I loved him first.”

“Yeah, never forget your first love,” he agreed.  

“Who was yours?” you wondered.  “You know, on TV.”

“Is that even a question?” he scoffed.  “Wonder Woman— Lynda Carter.”

“Really?” you giggled.

“Oh yeah,” he nodded, sticking his lips out a bit.  “I had it so bad for her and the little, uh… the little thing she wore…”

He gestured to his waist and crotch vaguely as he tried to think of the word.  “Hotpants?” you offered.

He grinned and snapped his fingers at you.  “Hotpants!” he agreed.  “Yeah, anyways, I watched that show way too much for someone who really isn’t into comic books.”

“You’re just into everything else geeky,” you assumed.

“Hey, listen— I’m not some kind of nerdery slut,” he corrected with raised hands. “I like D&D.  And Lord of the Rings.  And metal, if that counts.”

“The way you like it?  Definitely,” you nodded.  “I’m afraid you’re gonna wear that new Metallica tape out, you keep listening to it over and over.”

He smiled proudly.  “Okay, yeah, I’m a metal geek, then.”

The commercial break ended and with that classic sitcom musical sting, the episode continued.

“Hey, there’s your man,” Eddie nodded at the TV, “and his glorious mullet.”

“Mm,” you hummed appreciatively.  “He does have great hair.”

“Uh, hello?” Eddie prompted, and when you looked over at him, he fluffed his hair with one of his hands.

“Yours is okay,” you offered, “but doesn’t have the same, you know… lusciousness.”

“Pfft,” Eddie scoffed, but he offered no defense as both watched the show again.

It was Keith— aka David Cassidy, your preteen awakening himself— and his middle brother Danny walking to school together.  “I got one!” Danny pointed at him as they strolled.  “You’re so ugly your face oughta be arrested for littering.”  The canned laughter offered support for the mediocre joke, and you smiled a little.  “Top that one.”

“Alright, uh…” Keith replied, “you’re so dumb—”

Danny rolled his eyes.  “Not another ‘you’re so dumb’ insult, not very original.”  Keith frowned as he tried to come up with something better.

“I always wanted a family like that,” Eddie admitted quietly.

“Like what, a band?” you wondered.

“That too,” he nodded.

You frowned as you adjusted on the couch, struggling to get comfortable.  “Can you get up?  I can’t stretch my legs out,” you pouted.

“Yeah you can, just put your feet on my lap,” he offered.

If you were entirely awake, you would’ve questioned that more— but it was that time of night where even the strangest ideas seemed sort of fun, and so you stretched out a bit to let your feet slide across his thighs.  With one arm up on the back of the couch, his other hand came to rest on your ankle, and it made your breath catch slightly (though he didn’t seem to notice) before you relaxed.  Once you accepted it, it was actually kind of soothing— yeah, your heart raced for a second, but then your eyes kept getting heavier as you tried to blink them open to look at the glowing screen.

Sleep overtook you quickly, like a weight that sunk into you and just kept pulling you down.  You didn’t have any more dreams that night.

After you’d dozed off, Eddie’s gaze lingered on your still face for a moment; he smiled to himself, looking down at his hand on your ankle.  Gently, he stroked your skin with his thumb, checking your face again to make sure it wouldn’t wake you up.

He turned down the volume on the TV two more clicks, focusing on the scene before him again— something about Laurie having a date coming over to pick her up.  Mrs. Partridge greeted him at the door, before he joined Keith on the couch.

“Boy, glad that’s over,” the date sighed as Mrs. Partridge went upstairs to fetch Laurie.  

“What?” Keith asked him.

“Meeting the mother,” he answered.  “But your mother’s pretty cool… yeah, they usually give you the third-degree— you know, ‘where are you taking her’, ‘what time are you gonna bring her home’...”

“Ah, I know what you mean,” Keith agreed, not looking up from whatever he was reading— Eddie obviously hadn’t been paying enough attention to keep track of that.  “Where are you taking her?”

“Huh?” 

Keith shut his book and narrowed his eyes.  “What time are you gonna bring her home?”

“Early, after the movie,” the date replied defensively.

Keith scooted closer to the other young man.  “You, um, taking her to a walk-in or a drive-in?”

“A drive-in,” he answered.  Keith immediately began shaking his head.  “A walk-in?” the other offered instead, and Keith nodded approvingly.

“As long as it’s rated for the general public,” Keith added.

Eddie looked at you again, watching the blanket swell and sink each time you took a slow, deep breath.  He thought about getting up and going back to the bunk bed to sleep, but he was too afraid to wake you up if he tried to move your feet away.  Yeah, that was definitely the only reason that he wouldn’t get up now, now that he had you so close and you weren’t awake to try to push him away or tell him to fuck off.  Not that he didn’t enjoy that a bit… he just liked this more.  So, he’d stay for now and hold onto your ankle until you woke up and told him to stop.  Just because he could.

[nctsjiho]

King of Hearts

warnings: none

era: July 2021

❀ Lucas decides it’s time to take JiHo out for her first date

Leaned over the kitchen counter, rolling an orange from hand to hand, JiHo was deeply invested in the conversation she was having with her manager. Not Yebin, but her Esteem manager she was currently living with. The poor piece of fruit had suffered bruises from the few times the young girl had dropped it or tossed it too hard, but JiHo paid no mind as she listened to Sihyun – the manager – talk about the latest gossip in the model and acting industry. Yes, JiHo had the ‘privilege’, or whatever you wanted to call it, to get the insider-scoop about that industry before stuff got public, if it ever went public anyway.

Mid-conversation the two women heard the keypad of their front door beep, indicating that someone was trying to get inside. Usually this would concern the residents, definitely because they were the only ones living in the apartment, but Sihyun knew. She knew JiHo had practically given the password to their house to all her groupmates.

And even though Sihyun wasn’t initially comfortable with 23 men being able to walk inside her house at any given moment, she quickly came to terms with it when all the boys had been nothing but respectful of her privacy and 99% of the time would announce their arrival. The only times they did not announce it was during the early afternoon hours when they knew JiHo would be home alone, or on the occasional moment they would just forget. This time seemed like one of those moments.

“Hello princess!” A loud voice boomed through the apartment from the small corridor. Sihyun who stood on the other side of the counter had a clear visual of the surprise visitor and smiled watching his goofy stance. JiHo however didn’t need to take a look at him to know who the visitor was. “Took you long enough, how many days have you been in Korea already? And you hadn’t visited.” JiHo continued to play with the abused piece of fruit earning a scowl from Sihyun – she knew the girl wasn’t going to eat that orange afterwards and it would be headed straight for the bin.

Soon enough two long, strong arms slithered around the girl’s waist. “I’m sorry, but I’m here now.” JiHo felt her bar stool turn – it wasn’t even a swivel chair – until she was met with a bright smile. She couldn’t help herself but smile back, yet her smile quickly turned into a confused frown when she saw the bag in Lucas’ outstretched hand. “What’s this? A house warming gift? You know it’s a little late for that now.” Lucas just smiled as he shook his head. “We’re going on a date! Now go change.” He pushed the bag into JiHo’s lap.

The girl’s confused expression quickly turned into one of shock, while Sihyun just tried to contain her excited shrieks behind her hands. The 26 year old woman felt like she was watching some sort of K-drama and no one would blame her, since Lucas looked like a handsome main-lead with his hair styled back and wearing a nice pair of jeans along with a crisp looking white button up. Oh how Sihyun wished she could get him to agree to work under Esteem, but he was already successful enough getting modelling jobs without having to look for any. Every clothing brand and fashion magazine in Korea and China had their eyes on him already. Esteem had nothing more to offer to him.

“A date?” The boy – man might be a more appropriate title for him – nodded his head wildly, messing his hair up a bit in the meantime. “Why?” “Because I heard you’ve had a stressful time these past months and so I want you to relax. Plus! I missed you and I want to hang out.” JiHo’s face softened at the confession, but she couldn’t help but feel the nerves flutter in her stomach. “But we can hang out inside and just order some food or something-“ The feigned disappointed shake of Lucas’ head cut JiHo off mid-sentence. “Chenle told me you’ve been playing Valorant every day after your schedules, practise and recordings. It’s time for you to get your butt outside.” Before JiHo could protest a sigh from behind the kitchen counter caught their attention.

Sihyun’s eyes widened as she saw the two young idols look at her, but she quickly regained her composure. “I agree with Lucas. You seriously need to leave this house more.” “I have been! I literally went skateboarding all the time with Yangyang this month.” JiHo defended, yet Lucas faked a cough to grab her attention. “What?” “I’ve heard you haven’t went since that last time when you invited He-“ “Okay! I’ll get dressed, I’ll be back in a few minutes.” JiHo pushed herself of the chair and ran towards her room. Lucas and Sihyun both just smiled knowingly before engaging in a conversation together.

Dresses weren’t completely foreign territory for JiHo, she had worn a handful now for work and she was well aware that her taste in fashion had changed over the past few months. She now wasn’t completely opposed to wearing a dress casually, even though this had not yet happened so far. However, as she looked at the dress she felt her hands get a bit sweaty.

It wasn’t that the dress was ugly, or too revealing. Not at all. It was just that JiHo actually really liked it, she didn’t know how to react. Slipping the yellow fabric over her head, she noticed how the dress fit like a glove, as if it was made for her. It was a silly thought, but somehow JiHo felt like she was having her princess moment right now – which was fitting because this was all thanks to Lucas who liked to call her princess. For once JiHo felt super feminine in a comfortable way and she wouldn’t like to admit it, but she really loved the feeling.

JiHo quickly put on one of the necklaces Lucas had bought her months, maybe even years ago, did her makeup in record time – well the makeup really only consisted of mascara and a lip tint – and made sure her hair looked acceptable to go out. Once finished she walked back to Lucas who was still talking to Sihyun.

“Oh you look so cute!” Sihyun almost squealed causing JiHo to roll her eyes. “I’m ready to go.” The young girl said to catch Lucas attention. He turned his body so he could see JiHo standing beside him. It took a few seconds before Lucas could form the right words to say, taken aback by how different JiHo looked right then. “Wow~ You look even prettier right now.”

The bright smile and breathy words coming from Lucas didn’t fail to make JiHo flustered. She’d already gotten used to Lucas calling her ‘pretty’ and ‘beautiful’ a lot of times and she knew that he meant it every time, but right now the words just seemed to register differently and catch her off guard.

An open hand “harshly” made contact with Lucas’ arm to which he winced. “Let’s just go.” JiHo mumbled going to the corridor where her shoes and bags were located.

Lucas couldn’t stop himself from helping to choose a bag and a pair of shoes for JiHo which he thought would fit best with her outfit. “Where are we even going?” She asked curiously after slipping on a pair of low, cream, sandal-like heels. “It’s a surprise, but we’re definitely getting some food as well and we won’t have to walk too much. So don’t worry.” He teased, but JiHo couldn’t help but smile. “You know me too well.”

To say that JiHo needed this “date” was an understatement; with how she was beaming and laughing nonstop, Lucas could’ve sworn that if JiHo was locked up in her apartment one more day she would’ve completely lost it. He could visibly see how the tension in JiHo’s muscles melted away. The twinkle her eyes held looked so innocent and childlike, as if she was experiencing things for the first time. And as the duo now sat across each other at a table in one of the nicest rooftop restaurants in the area, Lucas couldn’t move his gaze from the everlasting smile on JiHo’s face boosting his pride.

“I didn’t know there was a butterfly garden in Seoul.” JiHo deeply exhaled, thinking back at how beautiful all the butterflies looked up close. “Did you like it?” Lucas asked, awaiting a positive answer. When JiHo’s eyes widened, Lucas started to get slightly worried, but the girl’s passionate answer quickly eased his nerves. “What do you think? I loved it! Every part. The butterfly garden, the café, and now this restaurant.” She then shoved the piece of steak that was on her fork into her mouth, not waiting until she had swallowed it she continued, “I think this is the best food I’ve ever eaten.”

A low chuckle left Lucas’ lips as he watched JiHo chew and swallow the rest of her food. “I should take you out more often then.” He smiled, mostly to himself, but JiHo perked up at his words. “Hm? Why?” Lucas looked up to meet JiHo’s eyes. “I mean, today was great, so yeah I’d definitely wouldn’t mind doing this again. But why would you want to?” “Because I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile this beautifully before.”

At his words JiHo couldn’t help but blush, the comment completely catching her of guard. She wondered how after those years of compliments Lucas managed to make her blush like that, but somehow, today, Lucas had found a way so that any- and everything he said or did would make her feel like a young teenage girl going on a date with her crush.

“You always try to be so professional and even if you have fun and play around sometimes, it’s like you’re always on your toes. Seeing you let go and genuinely be happy, being able to forget about your worries, it looks absolutely stunning on you JiHo.” JiHo looked down at her now empty plate before mumbling, “Did China turn you into a cheesy heartthrob or what’s up with you?” It was barely a question and definitely a coping mechanism – JiHo didn’t know how to react to Lucas sincerity – but Lucas was all for it, laughing at how adorable JiHo looked.

“What? Are you falling in love with me princess?” JiHo looked up with a gasp. “Don’t call me that in public! If someone hears you and recognises us, dating rumours are definitely going to spread and SM won’t be happy.” JiHo scolded, but Lucas could only laugh. She was clearly just trying to avoid the question because she was already very aware that Lucas rented out the whole rooftop for the two of them, no one would be able to hear them. And even if she did forget, with just one glance it would’ve been obvious it was only the two of them there, besides the 2 waiters who were enjoying their own conversation at the bar.

Once the duo had finished their dinner and after they continued talking for about 2 hours afterwards, they headed back to JiHo’s apartment. Luckily all the boys’ dorms weren’t too far away from the apartment, so Lucas wasn’t rushing to get her home or to leave after she arrived safely.

“You really didn’t have to walk all the way up here. You’re acting like we’re in some teenage chick flick.” JiHo smiled as she pushed in the code into her door’s keylock. With that Lucas leaned against the wall next to her – in the most cliché way – while sending her a smile of his own. “Do you not like it?” The keylock dinged at the correct input and JiHo began to push open the door with one hand, the other hand pushing at Lucas’ chest. “Careful or I’ll tell Yuta oppa about this and I don’t think he’d be too happy.” For a second Lucas smile faded as he felt the tiniest bit of fear arise at the though of his hyung’s possible reaction, but his smile returned just as quickly. “I’m sure he won’t after he sees all the pretty pictures I took of you today.”

Again JiHo felt her cheeks flare up just the slightest, but this time purely out of embarrassment. “Don’t show those pictures to anyone.” “But you looked pretty today. And it’s not as if the boys haven’t see you wearing a dress before.” JiHo just shook her head and sent him a warning glare. “But I don’t mind being the only one who’s allowed to see you look this pretty- Ouch! What was that for?” The boy held his arm where he just got pinched.  “For being annoying.”

A pout formed on Lucas’ lips but it quickly got wiped away once JiHo pulled him into a quick hug, making sure the front door didn’t fall back into the lock with her foot keeping it open. “Thanks for today. Thanks for being my prince and taking me out on my first date.” Normally JiHo would cringe at her own words, but somehow every ounce of shame was thrown out of the window now that she was around Lucas. “It really was your first date huh?” He smirked, cocking one brow. “Yeah yeah, now don’t go ‘bragging’ about it to the others, okay?” However Lucas just smirked again as he began making his way to the elevator. “No promises princess!” JiHo hushed him, but he was already inside the elevator, doors closing behind him. “Oh God, Doyoung, Yuta and Kun are all going to kill him.” She mumbled to herself walking into her apartment.

Just as the door closed behind her she heard her phone vibrate. And then vibrate again. Until it just became one constant buzz. Looking at her phone she saw the notifications of the NCT group chat along with the words ‘Lucas and JiHo’ as well as ‘date’ and ‘princess’. Shaking her head in disbelief and deciding to ignore the messages until tomorrow, JiHo mumbled to herself again. “At least if I don’t get to him and kill him first.”

---

Side Note: The only reason that this writing is called ‘King of Hearts’ is for me to tell you that you should listen to that song. Winwin’s vocals 👌 Yangyang’s last verse 👌 Hendery during that live performance of this song in Bangkok (he’s so hot and talented, please stan him)👌 How this song was literally made for Lucas 👌 Yes I’ve listened to it 10+ times on repeat one day and I’d gladly do it again!

Also someone tell me to stop posting every other day, why am I doing this to myself also me feeling writing/creative withdrawal when I don’t post😅 

Have a nice day/evening/night loves 🤍💚🤍

[pixie-cocaine]

ATEEZ Reaction To: their S.O. wearing baggy clothes

ateez reacting to their gf wearing a short plaid skirt with a super oversized sweatshirt that goes down to almost their skirt length 

Theme: different dates :D

Hongjoong ♡:

• You were both were going out to go to a famous planetarium

• You always did like looking at the stars and how they hung in the sky, sparkling like the moon’s reflection in any body of water

• So this was a cool little experience that both you and Joong could have together

• You wanted to dress casual, so settling with a roomy beige sweater, decorations of black diamonds sewn in, along with a red plaid skirt was what you went with

• By roomy, you meant damn-near covering the skirt, which gave the look a lax, puffed out appearance

• That shit was B I G

• His reaction?

• The softest eyes ever omfg I’m sobbing-

• No dramatic gasps, no squealing (I’m looking at you. Mingi)

• Just being able to see his indifferent expression melt away into a pure puppy face as you emerged from the hallway into the living room

• All you were wearing was a skirt and sweater but to him, every single outfit brought out more of your beauty

• You never failed to amaze him

• Allowing a small smile, he’d use his hand to gesture toward you

• “You look lovely”

Calm outings with Joong are always the most wholesome smfh I’m so mushy because of this goldfish-looking bit-

Seonghwa ♡:

• A sweet picnic-esque date in a secluded flower meadow with Hwa?

• You’d be mad to say no

• It was a nice warm-air temperature outside, so you settled for a yellow loose knit sweater and a matching yellow plaid skirt to go with it

• The sweater swallowed up most of the skirt, resulting in only a small bit of the skirt being visible, but you thought nothing of it

• Seonghwa certainly did

• He’d been eyeing you all the way to the picnic spot, face shadowing over with pleasant surprise when you came to stand in front of him, and sparkling eyes flicking over to your direction every couple minutes

• god can you imagine feeling his gaze on you?

• looking over at him, and watching as he would catch your eyes, only to quickly focus back on the road in front of him

• I’m gonna turn your kneecaps to dust if you don’t fucking speak up, Hwa

• Eating cutely-packaged lunches on top of the pastel pink blanket turned into Seonghwa’s head lying on your lap as you plucked the various flowers and placed them in the silky tresses of his inky black hair

• Sweet peas, Marigolds, and Hydrangeas flecked Hwa’s locks, complimenting gorgeously against the slight tan of his skin, as well as the patches of sunlight gleaming onto his face through the leaves of the tree you sat against

• He was truly stunning, especially when he opened his previously closed eyes to stare up at you, a smile slowly tugging at the corners of his lips

• You brush a thumb across Seonghwa’s cheek, “Why were you looking at me earlier?”

• “Because of your outfit,” The hand already resting hand against your thigh began to play with your skirt 

• “What about my outfit?”

• “It makes you look adorable”

Yunho ♡:

• You already know fairs and amusement parks with Yunho are gonna happen

• Like are you kidding me?

• Baby LOVES doing wild things with you

• It was in the afternoon, pretty cool weather, and you kinda just threw on what you saw

• What you saw, being a very big black cotton sweater and blue plaid skirt

• Nothing too much, nothing too less

• Bruh, he really couldn’t stop calling you cute

• Even as soon as you came out of the room, he was like

• “aWAWAWWWWW LoOk AT yoU”

• Loud as hell, as usual

• Walking around and playing all the games, as well as riding the rollercoasters and such, Yunho couldn’t stop staring at you every now and then

• You were beaming; neon lights and vibrant colors glowing against your face as you both roamed around

• Adorable UwU

Yeosang ♡:

• This man is a freak

• He’s literally so weird lmao

• But that’s what you find so damn goofy about him

• Anyways, bowling! :)

• “How cute,” he smiled from his spot on the couch, cooing upon seeing your outfit of an oversized wine red sweater and black plaid skirt, barely visible upon the sagging top

• You giggled, giving him a small spin before you guys were off

• He really did like the look, and he wasn’t afraid to tell you either

• A couple hours after getting your ass handed to you in the rounds of bowling, you and Yeosang took a seat with a couple of fries and rootbeer floats

• You could feel his eyes on you, so you looked up from your food

• “Yes?”

• He grinned and pointed to your exposed legs

• “I just never noticed how pretty your thighs are”

I still can’t believe he stirred eggs for +2 hours. A literal crackhead.

San ♡:

• Karaoke night, y’all

• Hitting high notes? Girl- a breeze

• Just scream into the mic and turn people deaf, they won’t be able to tell the difference

• Anyways

• Your choice of outfit?

• A pink fleece sweater and black plaid skirt

• You were stunning omg

• San would be melted, bro

• “Oh!”

• Literally couldn’t say anything else besides that you were fluffy-looking. Jus wanted to cuddle you right there and then, yanno?

• Turning up to the karaoke bar would be wild. You’d stand on that mini stage and be doing little dances here and there

• San wouldn’t be able look away from how small you looked in that sweater

• Like a liddol lamb

• A proud hubby

Mingi ♡:

• When I said he squeals, he SQUEALS

• He’s loves soft things, and so when you come out looking like a purple marshmallow in the puffy oversized sweater and slate grey plaid skirt, it automatically makes him let out weird noises of adoration

• Tackles you in a hug

• Babbles on about how huggable you are and random things in general while pretty much crushing you

• After he’s done squeezing the life out of you, he’ll be all bouncy 

• Roller skating tiiiiiiime

• Y’all gonna get CRAZY crazy

• Cuz I already know this man right here is gonna be falling on his ass a lot

• But he’ll make sure to stay by you, always giving you a push and hyping you up

• “You look like a little fairy. Pose!”

• After your ankles are bouta pop off and you guys sit down, he’ll be looking at your outfit again

• “You should wear stuff like that more often. You look really cute”

Wooyoung ♡:

• Bumper cars, bitch

• Cuz every other idea I had involves not being able to wear a skirt unless you wanna flash everyone casually walking by

• I’m not judging if that’s what you want tho

• After rummaging through your closet for a bit, you settle for a plain white knitted sweater and black plaid skirt

• Woo would find you absolutely darling, bro

• “Aww, cute, cute”

• But wouldn’t be mulling over it too much

• Because you always look good, and this is only one of the many cute outfits he’s seen you in

• Still, he’d give you some up-and-down’s a couple times throughout the night, probs compliment you a couple times, too

• Other than that, the date would be very fun 

• [insert Woo’s devil laugh]

Jongho ♡:

• Big big babie

• A simple ice cweam and city roam date with Jongie 

• god it’d be so soft

• Also, he’d be in love with how your sweater was so big that i gave you sweaterpaws, as well as the drape of it over your form

• He’d just wanna put you in his pocket and take you everywhere with him

• HAND HOLDING OMFG LEAVE ME TO CRY ALONE

• “You look really nice”

In a nutshell, Jongho deserves the world

[fallout-drabbles-n-stuff]

Modern Au! Romanced Companions react to horror movies/what movie they’d watch

Cait:

(Insidious)

“Oh what the fuck? That ain’t right.”

God she hated demons and all things ghostly. She wasn’t the jumpy kind by any means but that kind of stuff? Always finds a way to make her cringe and shudder. She’s pretty good at hiding her fear though, putting up an unfazed facade- rolling her eyes when you asked if she wanted to keep the lights on.

Yes....yes she does.

Curie:

No, nope, nah-ah, not gonna happen. She will not watch scary movies. Nothing you say can sway her to even humor it.

Danse:

(Lights out)

“Don’t worry love, I’m here...wait, what was that?”

Totally tried to pretend he isn’t bothered by the movie. “Soldiering through” the show, fighting the urge to cover his eyes or even gasp during certain moments. However he’ll wrap his arms around you, noticeably tensing when a jump scare pops up. After the movie is when the real show begins.

That night he’ll be in a hurry to go to the bedroom, making sure to turn on the tv- leaving it without sound for the light. If you so happen to wake up and turn it off, you’ll wake up later to the lamp on his bedside table shining you in the eyes. Even more so funny, you’ll hear your big, totally not scared, boyfriend shriek when you turn the lights off before he leaves the room.

Deacon:

(The Purge)

“Ooh, would’ve never thought to hide there..come on, are they even trying?”

He’s scared. Very scared. But does he show it? Hell no. He instead relies on his witty humor to cover up the fact that he is currently trying not to scream like a little girl.

The following night is not nice, not at all. He makes sure to make his rounds locking the doors, once..twice...maybe even thrice.

Gage:

(Jigsaw)

“Well that’s just ridiculous, that ain’t hardly realistic.”

At some point, Gage started being the source of your fear. He wasn’t bothered at all by the intense gore, even chuckling at certain points. Plus he’d critique some of the more silly traps. However you know damn well he wouldn’t do anything to you so..eh, alright.

If you are startled later on and start doing the classic “run through the halls in the middle of the night”, he surprisingly won’t tease you for it, instead opting to be the “big spoon”..heh, he may just do some kind of “activity” to take your mind off of the scary movie.

Hancock:

(Zombieland)

“Aw sunshine, this is supposed to be a funnier one. Come on, how can you be scared of zombie strippers babe?”

He’s a horror movie enthusiast, especially when it comes to zombies. So no, personally he wasn’t bothered- at some points he even outwardly laughed. If you ended up being scared, he’d gladly open his arms up for you to cuddle. He’s gotcha.

Macready:

(Chucky)

“Dang, I don’t think I’ll be looking at duncan’s toys the same way after that.”

He didn’t do too well with the movie, visibly jumping and even paling when scarier scenes came up. True to his word, he even “jokingly” asked you if you thought duct taping some of his son’s dolls to their chairs would be a great idea.

Maxson:

(Nightmare on Elm Street)

“Heh, I’ve seen scarier.”

He tried so hard to be all macho, acting as though nothing about the film bothered him. Although he was pretty enthusiastic about you cuddling closer to him, sharing a blanket with you. When asked what he thought, he’d just shrug it off and laugh...but you knew better from the way he clinged to you later that night.

Plus he was damn adamant about sharing a shower with you, well, more so than usual.

Nick:

He’s another one of the “hell will freeze over before I watch them” kind of people. He swears they don’t freak him out but when you go to flick the channel to it...well he doesn’t look quite as calm. Even though he’s a detective, he still can’t stand the supernatural “perpetrators”.

Old Longfellow:

(Halloween)

“Ah, a classic. Nice choice cap.”

Is genuinely unaffected. I mean, he thought it was almost ridiculous to be afraid of this big bad serial killer that wears a Captain Kirk mask...

Piper:

(Texas Chainsaw Massacre)

“Good god, damn that’s gnarly.”

Look, she’s a reporter. Nothing really scares nor surprises her at this point, even crazy back country cannibals. If anything she kind of thinks it’s funny? Yeah, funny, but she’ll still acknowledge the gorier scenes with “hmph”.

Preston:

(Annabelle)

“Oh no..no, babe why?”

Lord he hated scary movies, it was one of the things that really bothered him. He isn’t exactly easy to scare per se, but the jump scares always get him, so yeah, he’s going to be the one to hide his face and snuggle into you to block out the scary sounds and buildup music.

Sturges:

(Pet Sematary)

“Uh, baby cakes..you sure you really want to watch this?”

Plays it off like he’s looking out for your own well being, covering your eyes and whatnot despite you showing him away. Truth be told, he’s scared half to death. The little girl being risen disturbed the shit out of him too.

While the movie plays he’ll do his best to not show any sign of being spooked but when you finally decide to call it a night, you’ll catch him looking over his shoulder and walking a little too fast back into the bedroom after getting some water.

X6-88:

(House of 1000 Corpses)

“Oh, is that all? I don’t understand why everyone said it was so bad..”

Okay look, you didn’t expect any less out of him. Never in his life, that you know of, has he ever outwardly displayed fear. Even when you clutched onto his arm, snuggling close for protection and hiding your gaze, he stayed perfectly calm and still.

He truly slept like a baby later that night.

(Hoped this counted for a Halloween themed post..)

[animeloverskylarmoon]

Bleach Fanfiction- Chapter 6

"What did I tell you about eating my candy!!" you fired. You were at it again. Shinji always came by your room just to steal your stuff. 

"I dnft know whaf you mean." he said with a mouthful of sweets. The pulse on your head grew. 

"You stuffed your face and you're acting like you didn't do it!!" 

You pulled out your zampaktou with a dark chuckle. He started to sweat nervously. He swallowed. 

"N-Now now, you wouldn't raise your blade against your captain." You smirked and he flash stepped away. You sighed glaring at the door.

"Baka."

~~~

"Things have been really slow." 

You were strolling through the Rukongai with Kensei. The both of you were on patrol, just to make sure nothing unusual was going on. Since your confession, things had actually been better than ever. Your feelings had been a weight you were carrying around all those years. 

Now that he knew you felt lighter. Of course at the beginning it was awkward. Kensei would refrain from touching you and patting your head at the beginning because he thought you didn't want the contact. You assured him that it was fine and now you talked to Kensei about everything. You were glad you never had to risk his friendship. In the back of your mind you were sort of relieved.

"I'm going to fall asleep if something doesn't happen soon." He said boredly.

"Is that so reaper?" 

You flinched, turning at the voice behind you. Neither of you had a chance to react. A tentacle came out at you, striking you in the shoulder. You gasped when the appendage went right through. It pulled back and you stumbled forward. (Y/N)!!" Kensei's eyes blazed. You were shocked when his reiatsu released in a burst. He pulled his mask on and the hollow look just as surprised. 

"H-How do you possess a mask!You're a reaper!" 

It sounded panicked. Kensei raised his blade, slicing the hollow directly down its center. It let out a shrill cry disappearing. When it was gone Kensei turned to you, his mask vanishing. He picked you up into his arms. You winced slightly. Your shoulder was bleeding badly. 

"U-Usually I could sense them better.." you said apologetically. He grunted. 

"Stop talking I'm getting you help." he took off with you in tow.

~~

Hanataro was tending to a patient when Kensei appeared out of nowhere. The blue haired boy stumbled back. "M-Muguruma-taicho!!" Kensei didn't waste time. He placed you on an empty bed. "She needs help!" Hanataro moved forward watching the huge hole in your shoulder. 

You had fallen unconscious on the way. "Please wait outside." Hanataro instructed. Kensei was about to object, but Unohana walked in. 

"He can't work efficiently if you hover around. So please wait outside. " 

She said it in a polite voice but the look in her eyes assured him that it wasn't a request. Kensei sweat dropped. "H-Hai.." he stepped out of the room as Hanataro got to work.

~

"Where is she!!" you jumped when you heard the door slam open. Shinji looked frantic. He stormed in the Fourth Squad barracks. You turned to Shinji with a blush. He stopped short when he saw your attire. Your shoulder was covered with gauze and you had your black bottoms on, trying to pull the top part back over your body. 

You were holding your uncovered chest. You didn't think anyone would come in so you didn't think twice about changing. Now you realize that was a wrong move. You spun around dropping to your knees with a scream and Shinji finally reacted. He ran out of the room hurriedly. Shinji's cheeks were visibly red.

"I-I had no idea she was so.."

Hanataro appeared, hearing the scream. "Is she hurt!!" he panicked, rushing in the room.

"H-Hey wait!!" Hanataro had already entered.

"K-KYAH!!!" Hanataro came running out almost immediately with flushed cheeks. He stumbled back hitting the wall. The door was wide open now. Shinji ducked when he saw a lamp come hurtling out the room. It hit Hanataro square in the face.

"P-PERVERTS!!!" you shouted embarrassed.

~~~~

"S-Sorry Hanataro..." the male was on a bed being attended to. He laughed. "I-It's fine I should have knocked." You were now fully clothed. You directed a glare at you captain.

"I w-was worried." he defended. You sighed. You bowed to Hanataro, thanking him for his help as you left him to rest. "Next time knock why don't you." He looked away.

"Sorry, the last time you got injured you didn't even say anything. When Kensei came and told me what happened it sounded bad. Then again I just took off so maybe it wasn't as bad as I assumed." you looked at him. "He must have been really worried.." you smiled up at him.

"I'm fine taicho." you assured him. He glanced at you. His eyes seemed focused on your shoulder. He could see the bandages peeking out from the side of your neck. "Kensei was worried too." he commented. You nodded. "Yeah, I should probably let him know that I'm okay. "

"You should be more careful, you underestimate hollows sometimes." You raised your head with a huff, walking off in the front angrily. 

"I know, I'm not a kid. You don't have to keep lecturing m-" you paused when you felt his arms wrap around you from the behind. His buried his face into your shoulder. His hair tickled your neck and your breath hitched. 

"I just want you to be safe (Y/N).."

You didn't reply verbally, just nodded your head. Lately it felt like things were changing between you and Shinji. He was a lot more...affectionate. 

"I'll b-be careful." you stuttered out. 

"Good girl.." 

He whispered against your ear. A pleasant shiver ran up your spine and you clenched your fist to keep yourself from making a sound. Why was his words affecting you? He always made comments like that before. Albeit always in a teasing fashion but still. Why did it feel different now?

Shinji watched you when he raised his head. Studying how much his words seem to be affecting you. He grinned. "So adorable. " he loved your innocent reactions. Teasing you always made his day. He liked that he was the one making your breath hitch. He was responsible for the redness that seemed to grace your cheeks now. He pulled away, turning you around slowly. Your eyes were trying to look at anything but his face.

His palm came down, lifting your chin. Your eyes darted up almost immediately, trembling. He could see the emotion behind them. He loved the way you were looking at him now.

"That's right, don't look at anyone that way but me."

Shinji had seen all those years you were pining over Kensei. There was always a longing in your eyes. He had to admit it made him jealous. But the look in your eyes now. The raw emotion, it gave him hope. It gave him life.

 "Shinji..." even the way you said his name. It made him want to ravish you. 

"How have I been able to resist you all these years?" 

He really had no idea. Sheer luck maybe. You were nibbling your lower lip nervously. Your eyes searching his.

"Is..this real?" 

You weren't sure anymore. Maybe you were hallucinating. That hollow must have put a number on you. At this point you didn't care. You just wanted him closer. Shinji leaned forward, and you were apparently doing the same. Your eyelids lowered with every passing second that he got close.

"Shin.."

"SHINJI!!!" you jumped back when something green crossed your vision, tackling Shinji to the ground. You stared owlishly for a few seconds.

"WHY THE HELL DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING!!!" He roared.

When you looked over Mashiro was clutching unto Shinji. She was pointing at the side.

"Kensei is being a bully again!!" she wailed. As if hearing his name he appeared. He looked pissed. His eyes softened when he saw you. 

"Hey, you're out already. I thought Hanataro said you needed to rest." you waved him off. "I'm fine with just a few scratches. Shinji stood with a grouchy look. "I'd appreciate it if your girlfriend didn't tackle me." He picked her up like a football, tossing her and you sweat dropped. She squealed when Kensei caught her with ease. 

"Don't worry I'll take care of her." he said with a sinister look. She paled.

"Save me (Y/N)-chan!!" You laughed awkwardly as he disappeared with her. You turned back to Shinji who still had a look of annoyance on his face. He caught your stare and you looked down quickly. 

"W-We should get back." you said hurriedly. You were already walking off and he followed behind. You knew he was staring at you, you could feel his eyes drilling holes in your back. You flushed.

Things were changing alright.

[aonesteddybear]

Quiet

On the other side of the door you could hear your family talking, laughing and chattering along about something you had no interest in as his lips left your jaw and moved to your neck biting and sucking even as you let out a squeak of objection.

kyoutani kentaro x  gender neutral reader

warnings: spicy. just pwp. e for explicit. 18+! i kept the spicy bit vauge for gender neutral reader!

word count: 1665 note: i made this in 40 min. and like i love aone but..i am a kyoutani simp first and foremost ajksdskj anyways enjoy

His hands were tight on you, pushing and shoving at your clothes as your lips clashed together in desperation. “Ken-” you started as he pulled away for a breath, but he was already back on you. Cutting off any remark you may have knowing he’d be scolded for his actions.

On the other side of the door you could hear your family talking, laughing and chattering along about something you had no interest in as his lips left your jaw and moved to your neck biting and sucking even as you let out a squeak of objection.

“No marks, they’ll see you just made them!” You hissed out, careful of your volume as he hummed. 

“No visible marks,” he retorted, his teeth grazing along your collarbone as his hands pushed up your shirt. He immediately jumped to your chest, nipping at the flesh there as his lips wrapped around a nipple.

His eyes snapped up to you, seeking out your approval and when you nodded his wolfish grin was clear even as he bit at the flesh there.

His hands groped at your ass as he grinded his own hips against you. “So fucking hot,” Hissed words pressed into your skin as he nuzzled into your chest for a moment, before he left another bite and then came up to catch your lips in his as he opted for pressing his fingers against your hole. 

Pressing at it impatiently for a moment before he pulled back, spitting on his fingers before he returned to prod at it and this time press in to you. 

Your hiss of pleasure was caught eagerly by his lips as he continued to whisper words to you.

“You’re so hot. God, I’ve wanted to fucking bend you over the table all evening. Walking around like you own the place. I just wanna stuff you full. Know my cum is dripping out of you-”

His words caused you to gasp, hitting his shoulder lightly with a squeak of his name falling past your lips as he grinned, his forehead bumping against you reassuringly. “I fucking love you.” He insisted and you couldn’t help the happy hum that escaped from you as his fingers curled inside you.

Stroking at the fleshy bit that had you panting into the kiss as he stroked at it expertly. “Kentaro,” You started again, lips against his and he made a soft noise in response. Shoving at your pants further pushing them to the ground as he undid his own jeans. 

He pushed you back then, lifting you to sit on the counter so he could spread your legs and fit evenly between them as he smirked at you as he pulled out his own cock. He once again spit in his hand, as he stroked himself a few times before he was pressing back between your legs. 

He rubbed his cock up against you, leaning forward to press a kiss to you before he was pressing against your hole with furrowed brows of concentration. Your own hand came up to cover your mouth, head lolling backwards in pleasure at the burning stretch.

Kyoutani wasn’t small by any means, and the lack of prep from your excitement was definitely evident with the soft burning sensation from you. Sensing your pain, his hands found your thighs, rubbing soft circles into your skin in appreciation as he further pressed in. 

“You got it, so good for me always.” He praised softly into your skin, voice muffled as he bottomed out. “You good?” He questioned, eyes flicking up to your face and when you nodded his eyes lit up, a soft lazy smirk sliding across his face. 

“I’m not going to be easy.” He warned and when you let out a huff of irritation with, a comment of “I know, so fuck me Kentaro.” he beamed.

“Be quiet for me, yeah, puppy?”

His words were the only warning you received as his hips pulled back, before they slammed back in with the same force. His hand flew up to your mouth before you could resort, clamping over it to keep the moan that almost slid past your lips from coming out.

“Don’t.” He warned, his hips moving at a brutal pace that had tears welling up in your eyes from pleasure. “Your father would kill me if he knew what a little cockslut you were for me.” He continued, leaning forward to whisper in your ear.

“Imagine how your family would react if they knew right now you were full of my cock. Just so desperate you couldn’t wait till we left.”

His words left you as shaky as his thrusts did, wanting to whimper and beg out for him as he fucked into you. His hand pulled back from your mouths, replacing it with his own lips as he kissed you.

His hands slid up from where he held your hips, opting to cup your face between them as he continued to repeatedly bottom out, his cock hitting the spot that made you see stars with each thrust. “You’re so fucking pretty.” He hissed out, his face pressed against yours. 

“I wish you could see how lovely you look when you take my cock. So fucking perfect, stretched around me like this.” As if his words inspired him, his hips stilled for a moment as he looked at you, his head cocking to the side before he instead opted to step back.

His hands were gentle as he gripped your hips, pulling you down from where you were positioned on the counter to instead maneuver you on shaky legs to spin around and lean across the counter.

As your head started to dip, his hand slid up along your back, tangling in your hair as he jerked your head back, forcing you to stare at yourself in the mirror.

“Watch.” He purred out, leaning forward as he covered you effectively as his hips moved against you for a moment before his cock found your hole once more and he was pushing in.

Your own hand came up this time, covering your mouth as you exhaled sharply. Eyes shutting tightly as you attempted to control yourself. 

His hand tapped at your side then, pinching at your skin until you opened your eyes and stared up at him in the mirror. “Look, how you come apart on my cock. You’re so fucking gorgueous.” He hissed out, hips slapping against yours as he fucked you with purpose.

You could feel the tight ball growing in your stomach, wrapping around you as he continued to whisper sweet words of praise into your ear. When his head hooked over your shoulder, pressing soft kisses to your skin in place of his words you couldn’t help the noise that slipped out your lips.

His head turned then, nipping at your jaw until you turned into him and his lips locked onto yours once again. You could tell by his frenzied thrusts he was close also, his movements were no longer the clean and concise ones you were used to as he chased his own peak. 

A sharp rapt on the door made you both freeze, your eyes snapping open as you jerked away from one another but before you could push him away his full body weight was being leant on you, preventing you from moving as he slowly grinded his hips into you. “Yes?” He questioned, and not for the first time you realized just how calm he could make his voice. There was no quiver to it, or anything to hint at the fact he was still currently balls-deep within you.

His hand rubbed at your skin carefully as one of your cousins cleared their voice on the other side of the door. “You ok? I gotta go, and you’ve been in there for a few.” They objected, and Kyoutani rolled his eyes above you.

“Bit busy. Use the other one.” He shot back, his fingers pinching at your skin playfully as he grinned down at you.

His hips rolled back slightly before they pressed back into you at a quicker rate once again. Careful not to make any noise as he fucked you slowly. Your cousin whined in complaint at that, but as footsteps stormed off, Kyoutani got braver once more. 

His hips fucking into you with new found energy as he tried to find the orgasm he had been denied previously. His hand slid down and around you, finding your own pleasure as he rubbed in time to his own thrusts which had you jerking up against him.

“Good, puppy,” He whispered softly into your ear, nipping at your lobe in appreciation as you pushed back against him. “Come for me. That’s it.” His words were encouraging as you squeezed around him. 

Eyes squinting shut in pleasure as you felt the ball that had been building all night rupture as pleasure washed over you. His hand clamped over your mouth as he held you tightly to his chest, hiding the whines that threatened to spill from you as his own head dipped and pressed tightly against your shoulder as his own hips stilled in you. 

His breathing was loud against your body, his hips stuttering as his own pleasure crested as he attempted to keep himself quiet from his usual moans and praises he’d give you. As you both stilled your mutual breathing was the only noise that filled the bathroom.

As his own lips pressed against you in silent appreciation, another irritable rapt on the door jerked you both out of your post-orgasmic bliss as your attention snapped to the door.

“I have to go.” Your cousin whined yet again, and this time it was you snapping “Go away!” 

You were met with silence as you and Kyoutani stared at each other, instantly realizing your mistake as your cousin went silent.

“Well, fuck.” He stated with a laugh, and you couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up also. “Yeah...fuck.” asked to be tagged: @spicykzumeknma​

[fruit-teeth]

Matters of Time and Fate (chapter 23)

The atmosphere had a palpable tension.

All was quiet as the mercenaries waited for Helen to speak. Olivia stood outside the conference room doorway, clutching her plush cat in her hands. The beady, glass eyes of the cat stared back up at her, and in them, she saw her reflection. She didn’t know what she felt now, or what she wanted. Perhaps she needed answers, she thought. All the more reason to eavesdrop on the grownups.

Helen finally broke the silence as she stood at the front of the room, staring out at the people who worked for her. “The attack today was…unanticipated. But all of you handled it well, and for that, I commend you.”

Murmurs of agreement rumbled through the mercenaries. There was never any doubt that they were good at what they did, and it was always gratifying to be recognized for it.

Spy, however, only glared at Helen from where he sat. He was quite aware that she had noticed him glaring, as she was averting his gaze. She focused on her nails for a moment before looking back up at the men.

“Yet, this is far from over,” Helen went on. “Sage will only take a moment to lick his wounds, and once he does, he will be after us again. Our goal now is to stop that before it starts…” she cleared her throat, opening up a file on the desk. “I have here a floorplan of Sage’s residence, and with it—”

“Whoa, hold on!” Scout cut in. “You tellin’ us we have to break in there? Why? For that damn Australium?”

“Do not interrupt me!” Helen snapped at him, less restrained than usual.

“No, answer me!” Scout argued, standing up in a rage. “Maybe you should get that stuff yourself!”

Engineer grabbed Scout by the clothes, yanking him back down into the chair. “Sit down and watch your mouth!”

Helen’s eye twitched as she glared daggers at Scout. After a moment, she answered in a forceful tone, “I’m not doing it myself because that’s not my job. You are a mercenary, and that is your position here.”

“You are not doing your job very well, are you?” Spy spoke up suddenly.

The whole room froze.

 Helen finally turned to face Spy, her jaw noticeably clenched. “What did you just say to me?” she managed after a few seconds, her voice rougher than usual.

Spy would be lying if he didn’t say that he look Helen gave him sent chills down his spine, but he refused to back down. “You heard me.” He got to his feet and looked her in the eyes. “If you were doing your job correctly, you would have resolved this dispute with Sage long ago—”

“Oh, please!” Helen scoffed. “You have no idea what the full scope of this situation, you don’t—”

“Let me finish!” Spy barked, louder than he’d intended to. He knew he was only making Helen angrier, but he wasn’t going to quit. “Not only that, but you would have noticed that you were not the target of that attack!”

“I never said I was the target,” Helen defended.

“But you thought you were, which is why you did not show up during the fight until we had gotten the upper hand.” Spy pointed out. “You were willing to risk us before you risked yourself!”

The mercenaries began to mumble louder as it gradually dawned on them that this was true. Helen noticed, but she hardly reacted. She took a few steps closer to Spy, pausing only a few feet in front of him.

“Like I said,” she began. “That is your job. I don’t see what’s so hard to understand about this.”

“It’s not me I’m concerned for,” Spy countered. “Or any of us, for that matter. We don’t need your help – in fact, we would have won regardless of whether or not you appeared at the last moment. My concern lies with Olivia…” he paused, watching Helen’s reaction. “She was the target, Helen. Not you.”

Helen’s face dropped. The other mercenaries sat in silence for a moment, processing this information.

“How do you know!?” Demoman demanded to know, his tone of voice a cross between fury and concern.

“Because the head of those bounty hunters went after her intentionally.” Spy explained. “I have a history working with bounty hunters, assassins, and other types – they tend not to go after children unless someone has specifically told them to, or if they believe the child might be a witness. In any other scenario, they would have ignored her and proceeded with their job, unless she had gotten in the way,” he said, clearing his throat and returning his gaze to Helen. “And she was not in the way, she was shut up in the shed outside.”

Olivia felt numb as she listened from outside the door. She really had been in danger…

She leaned herself as near to the wall as she could without being seen, waiting for Helen's response.

Helen took a moment to collect herself, before looking back up at Spy. “Well…what would they want with Olivia, anyhow? She doesn’t have any rights to Mann Co., they can’t make her sign those away.”

Spy sighed. “Oh, I don’t know…perhaps…there was some kind of information they knew about Olivia that they knew they could use to exploit you.”

Miss Pauling, standing towards the back of the room, tensed up when she heard Spy utter those words. She grit her teeth, muttering out, “Spy, don’t you dare…”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Helen hissed at Spy, jabbing a finger into his shoulder. “Sit down and speak to me in a civil tone!”

Spy didn’t even flinch when she touched him. “I will once you stop denying the truth.”

“Spy, what are you talking about?” Sniper piped up, his concern visible.

Helen and Spy’s eyes met. It fully sank in, then and there: Spy definitely knew her secret. Which meant…

“YOU!” Helen focused her vitriol at Miss Pauling, stalking towards her. “You told him, didn’t you!? Why would you tell him!? I trusted you!” her voice cracked, and she sounded as though she’d truly been betrayed.

“I’m sorry!” Miss Pauling defended herself, though the guilt began pouring out of her. “Please, Helen, I’m so sorry, I-I told him not to repeat it! I—”

Spy stood in front of Pauling, protecting her, although he knew Helen would never try and hurt her. “I gave her no choice, Helen,” he explained. “Do not blame her.”

Helen was beginning to crack: she’d begun panting, her hands were shaking, and her eyes were open so wide that it looked almost unnatural on her face. The mercenaries all watched silently, hoping for some sort of answer as to what was happening.

“Everything I have done,” she spoke in a shaky voice. “Has been to protect Olivia.”

“Everything?” Spy glared back at her. “Even putting her in danger? Even allowing her to continue living with Gray Mann after you learned the truth? Even abandoning her when—”

Helen struck Spy across the face with her palm, shrieking, “You wouldn’t understand! You aren’t her mother!”

Spy staggered backwards and collided with Miss Pauling, but she grasped his shoulders and helped him to his feet. She looked to Helen pleadingly. “Helen, stop this!”

“Wait!” Scout exclaimed, realizing. “You’re Olivia’s mom!?”

“Oh, I see it now!” Medic gasped, studying Helen’s face. “The hairline, it’s definitely the hairline…I see it!”

Heavy just sat there, dumbfounded. “This whole time…Olivia had mother, but it was you. And you said nothing…”

Spy composed himself, straightening back up. “It’s not wise to keep these things a secret, Helen.”

“The pot’s calling the kettle black, isn’t it!?” Helen’s voice didn’t even sound like her anymore, she sounded unstable and brutal. “You have no right to criticize me for the choices I made when you—” She took a breath, looked at Scout, and then pointed a finger at Spy. “That’s your father!”

“Helen!” Spy shouted, reaching for her to try and shut her up, but it was no use.

Helen smacked both of his hands away in a fury. “Do not touch me!”

Scout laughed from where he sat, although it was the most forced laugh he could muster. “Ha! Funny joke, but he ain’t my dad! Right?” when the only answer he got was awkward silence, the color drained from his face. He slowly looked to Spy. “…right?”

“Um…” Spy shifted, starting to back away. “I don’t…”

When the silence continued, Scout whirled around to the other mercenaries. “All of you knew!? All of you knew, and you didn’t say shit!?”

Sniper groaned. “Mate, we tried to spell it out for you, many times!”

“You did what!?” Spy clenched his fist at his side. “Oh, why did I ever think to tell you!?”

“You aren’t as subtle as you think,” Engineer pointed out.

Heavy had enough, and he stood up. “Everyone, quiet!” he boomed. “You are all fighting like children! Like little babies at playground, you never stop!”

“She started it!” Spy defended, pointing at Helen.

Heavy left his seat, putting his hands between Helen and Spy and separating them. “I am disappoint.” He clicked his tongue. “Is not good…” he then turned around, and upon seeing Scout, he reached over and patted his shoulder. “How you feeling, little man?”

“I dunno…” Scout confessed, blinking slowly.

The floorboards by the door creaked. Heavy glanced up, and he took a breath. “Oh…”

Olivia stood in the doorway, the stuffed cat hanging at her side. She stared at Helen with wide eyes, the information she’d learned turning over and over in her mind.

Helen spotted her, but swiftly avoided her gaze, unwilling to confront Olivia's awareness of the truth.

“Is that true?” Olivia asked, her voice timid. She walked across the room, stopping just a few feet away from Helen. “You’re my mommy?”

Gray had always told Olivia that her mother hadn’t wanted her. He'd never said anything else, and Olivia had never inquired, as this subject had only come up when Olivia questioned why the children on TV had moms but she didn't. That fact had broken her heart and made her question why she couldn't possibly have been wanted, but she had assumed it didn't matter.

Now she was here, peering up at the mother who hadn't wanted her, the same woman who had ripped her from her home and company and brought her here. Olivia found herself grabbing part of Helen’s skirt, tugging on it to try and get her to look at her. “You didn’t want me?”

Helen looked back at Olivia – her daughter, her child…the same child she’d given birth to on the floor of her bathroom, all alone. The same child who existed because Australium did not come with a warning label about a side effect being extreme fertility in older women. The same child who represented a part of Helen that she wanted to keep hidden, the part of her that let her guard down with a man she considered an enemy…she could almost hear Gray laughing at her, mocking her. She saw him in Olivia’s eyes, no matter how much she did not want to.

She could feel everyone staring at her, and her body seemed to close in on herself as her mind reeled. Instinct told her to pick up Olivia, to cradle her in her arms like any loving mother would do, yet that wasn’t what she did.

She ran away.

“Helen? Helen!” Miss Pauling's voice broke as she watched Helen flee out the door, and she chased after her. “Hey, hey, where are you going!?”

Helen did not answer, and she did not look back. She headed up to her room, grabbing a suitcase out of the closet and walking back downstairs. Miss Pauling pleaded with her, begged her not to go, to think about things, but Helen shut it all out.

She did not allow herself to feel anything at all when she stalked out the door with the suitcase at her side. She needed to be away, away from it all.

Miss Pauling watched her car disappear down the road, and the despair filled her veins. She sat down on the doorstep and began to sob, covering her face with her hands.

The door opened again, and Zhanna stepped out, taking a seat beside Pauling on the step. She put her arm around her, saying nothing as she held her and let her cry. Pauling only whimpered and sobbed, her shoulders quivering as she pressed her face into Zhanna's shoulder and wept.

At the same time, Olivia stood in the middle of the meeting room, her mind a confused mess of emotions. She’d finally met her mother, but her mother ran away again…

Heavy knelt beside her and softly stroked her shoulder. “Little Olivia?” he asked in a soft voice. “You all right?”

“I…” Olivia glanced towards the door, and then back at Heavy. “She left me…”

“I know,” Heavy stroked her hair with his broad palm. “But you have us.”

Scout sat on the floor alongside Olivia, equally numb. “Screw her, who needs her?” he grunted, bitter. “Screw parents who can’t be bothered to show up for their freakin’ kids.”

Spy listened from across the room, trying not to let his hand quiver as he lit a cigarette.

“Yeah…” Olivia leaned her cheek against his arm, staring at the wood paneling on the floor. “She just left me…”

“We ain’t garbage, y’know,” Scout pointed out. “We’re people, too!”

Olivia raised her head, her face flushed with rage. “Yeah!” she agreed, though her voice cracked. “She’s dumb! She’s dumb, because I’m smart like my daddy said, and I’m strong, and…and…and…” the anger melted away, and before she knew it, she had burst into sobs, her whole body shaking. “Mommy doesn’t want me…”

At the sight of her tears, Scout scooped her up and pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly. She hadn’t expected the hug, but she welcomed it as she let all of her emotions out in loud cries. Scout’s lower lip trembled as he held her, but he fought it, feeling as though he had to keep himself strong for her.

Then, somewhat out of the blue, Sniper stepped forward. He knelt beside Scout and Olivia, and he embraced both of them, saying nothing but pouring as much care into the action as he could. Scout just sniffled, lifting one hand to squeeze Sniper’s while using the other to hold Olivia.

Staring from a distance, Spy wished he could join them, but he knew he could not. Not at this moment. He turned away, the smoke from his cigarette dissipating into the air.

Olivia felt a heartache she'd never known before, as if there was something seriously wrong with her if she'd been so easily abandoned. Yet here, wrapped in the arms of two men who weren’t even related to her, she realized she was loved and wanted. The others were standing around, watching her, but she felt that they cared for her too.

Even in the midst of her sadness, the sensation of being wanted was one she wouldn't sacrifice for anything.

[trashyswitch]

William's Many Secrets

William thought he had done a good job of keeping his secret. But Chris comes downstairs and starts blurting out a letter William had wrote to Henry. This domino-effects into Henry and the kids discovering another secret about Will:

William is STUBBORN AS HELL!

This is gonna be my last fanfic for a good week or so. I am heading off to a beach cottage for summer vacation, and I'm leaving this morning! I will attempt to start another fanfic (because writing fanfics is so fun that I can't just stop for an entire week), but I likely won't upload anything until after next Saturday.

Disclaimer: There is indications of cheating. If you're sensitive to that subject, then...it's not that long...so, read at your own risk.

Other than that: I hope you like this fanfic!

Henry, William and the kids were having another play date together. Charlie was at another friend’s house, so only Henry and his wife could come. While the wives hung out on the back deck, William and Henry hung out in the living room watching TV and drinking a coke each. “Some lady called the pizzeria, asking for a birthday afternoon dedicated to her 9 year old son.” Henry told William.

“Yeah?” William reacted, only partly listening to him.

“You could hear the kid in the background being all whiny. And the moment she mentioned ‘Freddy Fazbear’, you could hear his screams of excitement echoing through the phone.” Henry told him, chuckling at the memory. “The kid wouldn’t shut up after that.” Henry concluded.

“Mm hmm…Don’t blame him.” William said back.

“His party friends are coming this Saturday. I’m gonna need a little help getting the place ready.” Henry told him.

“Let’s worry about that when it gets closer to the date.” William replied.

“What? Not in the mood to talk about work or something?” Henry asked.

William smiled slightly. “Not really, no. I just wanna rest and hang out without us needing to bring up work.” William replied.

“Ooooh...So you’re agreeing with my wife, then?” Henry accused.

William chuckled. “Did your wife tell you to not talk about work when you’re supposed to be relaxing?” William asked.

“Yes.” Henry replied.

“Then yes, I agree with her.” William concluded before taking a drink of his coke.

“Alright. Play it that way. But the moment you forget there’s a kids birthday party happening this Saturday, that’s your fault.” Henry warned him.

“Aww, you meeeaaan.” William whined sarcastically before smirking at him. Henry chuckled at him before giving William a slight push on the shoulder. This caused William’s coke to spill onto his shirt and jeans a little bit. “Hey! Watch what you’re doing, you clumsy elf!” William warned with a laugh before returning the push. Henry ended up getting more coke spilled on himself than William did. So, he pushed him again to make more coke spill. This led to a slight pushing fight to see how much coke could be spilled on the other opponent.

At one point, Henry made the genius mistake of purposefully spilling his coke on William’s pants.

“Oho, that’s it!” William put his coke down and quickly stole Henry’s glasses from his face.

“What- HEY! GIVE THEM BACK!” Henry shouted.

“You gotta catch me first, Devito!” William teased.

“GIVE ME BACK MY GLASSES, YOU BLURRY BOZO!” Henry shouted at him, taking off running after the purple-colored blur.

William laughed and ran into the kitchen before stopping at the counter. “Na na na na na, you can’t see me!” William sing-songed like a child.

Henry, getting more and more fed up with him, stopped in front of William. Just to be even more mean, William put the glasses on to see what he would look like wearing them. But the prescription in the glasses overwhelmed his eyes. “WhOoOoa! Okay! Your eyesight is worse than I thought!” William joked.

“Give them back now, William. No more games.” Henry ordered.

“How do I look?” William asked, striking a pose with the weirdly shaped rectangular glasses.

“You look like a blur of purple.” Henry replied, getting increasingly fed up with him.

“Yeah? And you like a blur of beige...aaaand a little blue.” William replied.

“William, give. Them. Back. You’ll hurt your eyes.” Henry ordered and held his hand out.

“Alright, alright. But can I put them onto your face myself?” William asked.

Henry sighed. “Fine. Just don’t poke me in the eye.” He warned.

“I won’t.” William replied before bringing the glasses closer to his face. William gently started lining up the sides of the glasses with his face, and gently inserted them onto his face. The first thing Henry saw perfectly clear, was William’s gentle face. It was super rare to see William this gentle with him. Henry began to regret the attitude he gave him.

He gave William a smile.

“Daddy! Look what I found!” Chris yelled to his Father and Uncle.

William’s gentle facial expression vanished slightly as he leaned back and looked down upon his youngest. The kid was holding a piece of paper in his hand. “What is it?” William asked.

“It’s a letter! It was in the typewriter upstairs! Dear Henry;” Chris explained before starting to read the letter.

William’s eyes widened. He immediately recognized what this really was! Suddenly scared, William ran up to his kid. “HEY-heeeeyy Chris! Uh- what have I told you about going through people’s stuff?” William asked him.

Chris only ran away from him a good 3 feet and continued reading. “I wanted to tell you this-”

“Chris, no.” William warned.

Chris looked up at his father from the corner of his eye, before smirking and continuing. “-for a while now, but I was too scared to.” Chris read.

William was visibly freaking out. “Chris! Stop! Reading!” William begged before his relationship with Henry was completely blown apart by this freaking letter.

Chris giggled and ran over to Elizabeth, who was standing at the stairs. “Elizabeth! Read this!” Chris ordered, handing Elizabeth the paper and pointing to the line she had to start on.

Elizabeth cleared her throat and smirked when she saw her father all blushy. “My friendship with you has been so amazing. Being able to partner with you to make Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria a success, has been an amazing experience.” Elizabeth read.

William was restless amidst his panicking. “Elizabeth, give me the paper.” William ordered.

Elizabeth only giggled at his attempt. “You’re red like a strawberry!” Elizabeth told him.

William’s eyes widened in horror as he struggled to keep himself calm. “E-Elizabeth...give back...give back my paper. That’s Daddy’s paper.” William attempted.

“Not anymore!” Elizabeth declared before sprinting away. Elizabeth took a shortcut past the other side of the table and headed into the living room. Then, she stopped and continued reading.

“I wish I could tell you in person how much you mean to me. But for now, I must rely on a paper and pencil or a typewriter.” Elizabeth read.

“I SWEAR-” William started to sprint, but was grabbed on the wrist. “Uh- Henry?! Let me go!” William ordered.

“You’re not going anywhere. I wanna hear this.” Henry told him.

Elizabeth continued to read. “This feeling is strange. I can’t describe it. I’ve never felt this way before. Usually when I’m with my wife, I feel like a smooth talker with all the confidence in the world. But when I’m with you, my mind goes blank and I can barely keep myself together.” Elizabeth read.

“Daddy, are you broken?” Chris asked.

William awkwardly tapped his fingers. “IIIIIIII...I don’t...I don’t know. Honest. No idea.” William stuttered.

Elizabeth blinked as she looked at the letter. Then, she gasped! Everything clicked! “YOU’RE IN LOVE!” Elizabeth blurted out.

William took a deep breath, and groaned in pure embarrassment.

“You’re in love! Love love love! You love him! You love Henry! It says so in your letter! ‘I have a crush on you’! You love him!” Elizabeth cheered excitedly, jumping around in front of her father.

William covered his face with his hands and growled into his palms. This was the most embarrassing day of his life. His kids had somehow found his letter, and were now blurting out his most well-kept secret.

“Daddy and Henry, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” Chris and Elizabeth taunted loudly.

The worst part was the super wide smile that was peeking through his hands.

Henry walked up to William, still in awe at the crazy confession, and put his hand on his shoulder. “Hey. You okay?” He asked. Henry tried lightly pulling on William’s hand to get his hand off of his face. And the half part of William’s face that he saw, made him literally beam from cuteness:

William’s face was visibly red and a huge toothy smile was present on his face.

“Oh my gosh- Your face is so red!” Henry reacted, unable to handle his personal excitement.

“Ihihi knohohohow...Ihihihit’s teheherriblehehehe…” William whined.

“Awww! Daddy’s all blushy! Daddy is blushy! Daddy is blushy!” Chris teased and poked his Dad’s side.

“Daddy’s in loOoOoOove! He loves Henry!” Elizabeth teased, before squeezing his other side.

“Wahahahait! Guhuhuys!” William giggled.

“Tickle tickle Daddy!” Chris teased. William grabbed his daughter’s hand and allowed Chris to poke his side. The truth was, the poking didn’t really tickle much at all. It was Elizabeth’s squeezing that seemed to surprisingly tickle.

“Awww...it’s not working.” Chris whined.

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes and tried tickling his side with her other hand. But, this didn’t make William react. It only made him smile in confidence. “What happened?” Elizabeth asked.

“I’m not very ticklish.” William told them.

Henry guffawed. “That’s a load of malarkey!” Henry reacted. “I used to tickle you all the time! And I got plenty of laughs out of you!” Henry reminded him.

“Those-...” William hid his nervousness very well. “That was just pity laughter. Nothing more.” William explained.

“Come on, man! It can’t be! Watch this!” Henry declared confidently before tickling his ribs. But William just sighed and let him try. His face was just monotone as he looked at his kids.

Then, Henry tried tickling the armpits. Other than William’s arm movement to give Henry more access, William wasn’t reacting at all. Chris was eagerly waiting to see if he would double over and laugh, while Elizabeth was going insane with how her father was being as calm as he was!

“Wait...What?” Henry reacted.

Next, Henry tried tickling his sides and his belly. William cleared his throat and just waited for Henry to be done tickling him. “You gotta be kidding me…” Henry muttered, before attempting to squeeze his hips.

William seemed relatively calm and composed. But, there was a slight reaction. And Elizabeth caught it. He widened his eyes and accidentally let a wobbly smile show up on his lips for 2 seconds or less. But he had quickly bit his lip and shoved the reaction down. It was here that Elizabeth realized: there was some lying going on.

Then, Henry finally stopped and crossed his arms. “Alright. I give up on the upper body region. But there’s one more spot I wanna try before I give up completely.” Henry told him. “Please sit down on the chair over here. I wanna test out your feet.” Henry ordered. Henry sat down onto the chair and spread out his arms on the armrest. “Right off the bat:” Henry pulled off one of William’s socks and tried tickling his feet. William didn’t make any reaction, besides the slight eyebrow raise he made in curiosity.

Elizabeth finally decided to confront her father. “Hey Henry: Go back to tickling his hips.” Elizabeth ordered.

Henry turned to look at her. With Henry not looking, William gave Elizabeth the index finger on the mouth to ‘shut your mouth’.

“Really? Why?” Henry asked.

“Because he smiled!” Elizabeth declared.

William narrowed his eyes and gave Elizabeth a ‘you evil’ kind of frown before resuming his normal look. “What smile? I didn’t smile.” William denied.

“Yes you did! And you just told me to be quiet!” Elizabeth told him as well.

Henry sighed and looked at Chris. “Did you see any of this?” Henry asked. William shot Elizabeth a look. He pointed at Elizabeth, before swinging his hand across the front of his neck, to say ‘you’re dead’.

“Yup. I saw the quiet thing, and I just saw Dad tell Elizabeth that she’s gonna die.” Chris told Henry.

Henry looked at William. “I think the person who’s gonna die here, is you.” Henry told him before lifting him up.

Henry stood his friend back up and started tickling his hips again. William squeezed his eyes shut this time, and started slightly squirming while attempting to push Henry’s hands off. But this only led to Henry tickling his sides instead! William turned himself to the side and widened his eyes. Scared a laugh would come out, William covered his mouth for a moment before attempting to reach back and stop him. But this just led to Henry digging his wiggly fingers into William’s armpits!

This time, William yelped and jolted before increasing his squirming dramatically! Henry began to grow more and more confident in his abilities. So, he pushed William’s knees down so he was kneeling down. “Quick kids! Tickle different spots on his body! And whatever you do: keep! Switching! Spots!” Henry ordered.

The kids didn’t waste any time! They ran up to William and tickled his belly, tickled his sides, tickled the front of his ribs, and tickled his exposed feet! Chris even tried tickling the lower part of his back while Elizabeth tried tickling his hips again. While the lower back was somewhat effective, the hips made the man double over for a couple seconds! To make things worse, the kids were teasing him and mentioning his darkening blush CONSTANTLY!

William was getting closer and closer to bursting. He had developed a wobbly smile that just couldn’t go away, and he was wiggling and squirming around like a skittish cat!

“Okay. Keep going...keeeeep going…” Henry encouraged.

“Why? What are you gonna do?” Elizabeth asked.

“You’ll find out very veeeeerrry-” Henry teased. Suddenly, Henry took in a quick deep breath and blew a gigantic raspberry on his neck!

“aaAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! HEHEHEHENRYHYHYHYHY DOHOHOHOHON’T!” William screamed before finally breaking.

“You did it!” Elizabeth yelled.

Henry, feeling proud of himself, let William go and allowed him to just tumble his giggly body onto the ground. “Aaaaand there he goes. Get ’em kids!” Henry declared.

Elizabeth and Chris both let out big war cries and started tickling absolutely everywhere they could reach! “HehehEHEHEHEY! NOHOHO FAHAHAHAHAIR!” William yelled at them. William helplessly turned onto his back and struggled to fight the kids without hurting them.

“Ohohoho! No fair?! No FAIR?! Did I just hear that right?! You just earned yourself another tickler!” Henry declared, pulling his sleeves up with an evil smirk on his face.

“Nohohoho! NOHO! NO, DON’T EVEN THIHINK AHABOHOUT IHIT! WAHAHAIT- NAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! DAHAHAHAHAHAMMIHIHIHIHIHIT!” William threw his head back and laughed hysterically! Henry was squeezing his hips like his life depended on it!

On top of that, Elizabeth had finished tickling his ribs and side, and had ran over to his lower body to tickle his feet. The moment she started scratching his left arch and heel, William squealed and pulled his foot away. “Ticklish feet, Daddy?” Elizabeth asked as she tickled the right foot next.

“PLEHEHEHEAHASE DOHOHOHON’T! IHIHIHI’M BEHEHEHEGGIHIHING YOHOHOHOU!” William pleaded.

“Wow! You’re actually begging us?! Are you really that ticklish?!” Henry exclaimed. “If that’s the case, then how in the world did you keep yourself from laughing before?!” Henry asked.

“Maybe Daddy needs more people to tickle him!” Elizabeth guessed as she sat on William’s lower legs.

“Maybe so.” Henry replied, keeping that in mind before lessening his fingers.

William did get a moment to breath slightly, but his breathing didn’t last long before he was thrown into another wicked fit of laughter. “ELIHIHIZABEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOHO FEEEHEHEHEHEHEHET!” William squealed.

“He has ticklish toes!” Elizabeth reacted.

“Awww! Does poor widdle Willy have ticklish toesies?” Henry teased.

Chris paused his tickling for a moment and giggled. “You sound like an anime girl.” Chris joked to Henry.

“I do?! No no no, I’m just teasing him.” Henry explained.

“NOHOHO IHIHI DOHOHOHON’T! NOHOHOHO TOHOHOHOES!” William yelled back.

“Oh! Even after all this tickling, you’re going to deny being ticklish on your toes?! Tickle him.” Henry told Elizabeth.

“Way ahead of you.” Elizabeth told him while tickling the balls of his feet and under all 10 of his toes. “Kitchy kitchy kitchy kitchy koo! Who’s a ticklish Daddy? Who’s a love-struck Daddy?” Elizabeth teased.

“STAHAHAHAHAHAP! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! EHEHEHEVIHIHIL! EHEHEHEHEHEVIHIHIHIHIL!” William shouted at them.

“What in the world is all the rack-” someone asked, before widening their eyes at the sight.

“Michael!” Chris shouted, pausing his tickling before running up and hugging his big brother.

“Hihi Chris!” He said back. “Tickling Dad, I see?” Michael teased. Chris whispered something into Michael’s ear, causing Michael’s eyes to widen and for a big smile to show up on his lips. “You’re a genius! Let’s go get it!” Michael declared before running into the kitchen with Chris in his hands.

“Well, there goes one tickler.” Elizabeth said.

“Let’s give your papa here, a break.” Henry suggested. He removed his hands from his armpits and looked at William upside down. “You okay, Mr. Giggles?” Henry asked.

William chuckled at the nickname. “You...are so…*huff* getting it...when...I can...breath. Again.” William warned him.

Henry smirked at the slight threat. “You know you’re just asking for it, right?” Henry told him.

“Asking for what?...A kiss?” William teased.

Henry raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Well...later. But for now: More tickles!” Henry teased before tickling his armpits and upper ribs.

“NahAHAHA! Cohohohome ohohohon!” William laughed, pushing him away.

“Nope! Can’t stop me that easily!” Henry grabbed Elizabeth and held her out to him. “I have a mini tickle monster, and I’m not afraid to use her!” Henry warned.

Elizabeth giggled before showing off her ‘claws’ and saying “Rawr!” at him.

“Aww, come on! I come out with a camera, and you choose to stop?!” Michael reacted.

Henry decided to unleash the tickle monster to see what she would do. Unsurprisingly, Elizabeth crawled all over William and started squeezing his hips, tickling his belly, squeezing his sides, and even tickling his ribs. “Hahahaha! Mihihichahahael! Tuhurn thahahat ohohohoff!” William told him, lifting his arms up to try and reach the camera.

Henry, taking advantage of the moment, wiggled his fingers in his armpits. “Gotcha, Will!” Henry said quickly.

“NohohOHOHOHO! HAHAHAHAHA! HEHEHENRYHY NOHOHOHO!” William laughed.

“Awww, poor Dad! He’s getting recorded against his will! Whatever will the ticklish man do?” Michael narrated.

“IHIHI’M GOHOHOING TOHO KIHIHIHILL YOHOHOHOU FOHOHOR RECOHOHORDIHING THIHIHIS!” William warned.

“That’s rude. Maybe a blow on your tummy will help?” Elizabeth asked. Then, Elizabeth blew a BIG raspberry right on her father’s belly.

“oHOHOHOHO JEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” William shouted and wiggled like the world depended on it.

“WOW! You nailed that perfectly!” Michael reacted.

“Oh! And by the way, Elizabeth: that’s called a raspberry.” Henry told her.

“A raspberry?” Elizabeth asked.

“Yup! Lay down.” Henry told her. As soon as she laid down, Henry lifted up her shirt and blew a raspberry on her belly next.

“EEEEHEHEHEHEHEHE!” Elizabeth giggled gleefully.

“And THAT is a big boy raspberry.” Henry told the camera.

“Do it on Daddy!” Chris told him.

William’s eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. “NO!” William warned.

“Oh! That’s not a bad idea!” Henry muttered.

“NO.” William warned a second time as he sat up and put a warning finger up.

“Lay yourself down.” Henry declared, pushing William back onto his back. “And let a pro handle this.” Henry said confidently.

“I’ll sit on his arm!” Elizabeth declared, before sitting herself on William’s left wrist.

William yelped. “Elizabeth! Get off!” William begged nervously. He tugged at his wrist, with zero success. He attempted to cover up his stomach with his right hand, but Henry had grabbed the wrist and held it aside.

“One…” He counted.

William gulped and widened his eyes as Henry wiped off Elizabeth’s slobber with Will’s own shirt.

“Two…” Henry counted.

Henry lifted up his shirt with a big smirk on his face.

“Three!” Henry took a deep breath, and blew a BIG raspberry onto his bare belly!

“NAHAHAHAAAAA! IHIHIHIHI CAHAHAHAHAHAN’T BREHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” William screamed.

Suddenly, his laughter went silent. It was here that Henry decided to cover Will’s belly and help him out. With Elizabeth out of the way, Henry lifted him up a bit and leaned him against the bottom of the couch. “I didn’t kill you, did I?” Henry asked.

William could barely speak. So, he nodded his head.

Henry chuckled and put his ear against his chest to feel his heartbeat. William, surprised by this gesture, immediately felt his face turn a scarlet red.

“Awwww!” Elizabeth cooed.

Michael lowered the camera and revealed his wide eyes and his dropped jaw. Hold up...does his father...have a thing for Henry?! Since when?!

Henry moved his head away from William again with a smile. “I can hear a heartbeat, so you must be alive.” Henry teased.

“R-Really?...That’sgood. That’s...very good.” William said, unsure of what to say at that point.

Elizabeth was clapping her hands and looking like an awestruck fangirl, while Chris was just watching in curiosity.

But Michael...was confused. Almost...hurt, but not hurt at the same time. The idea and the proof seemed to conflict him. Was his father bisexual? Wasn’t that considered a bad thing? If that’s the case, then why is his father one of them? And how did Henry feel about it? Was...was Henry bisexual as well?!

“Noooow KISS!” Elizabeth declared.

Michael jolted at the sudden declaration. Hold up, WHAT?! “Elizabeth!” Michael yelled at her.

“What? It’s true love!” Elizabeth told him.

“If that’s true love, then what was Mom and Dad?” Michael asked.

Elizabeth looked at Michael with confusion, before she gasped and looked at them. She didn’t even think about that!

William looked at Michael with a genuine guilty face. “Michael’s right. I can’t date anyone. I already chose the love of my life, and that’s your Mom.” William told Elizabeth.

Now it was Elizabeth’s turn to be conflicted. “But...But the…”

“Elizabeth...come here.” William told her. She walked up to her father and sat down beside him. He wrapped his arm around her. “We may not have a love relationship. But, we have the next best thing: an amazing friendship. If you wanna tell us to keep our friendship, then that would be amazing. But please...leave the kisses out of our friendship.” William told her. Elizabeth sighed, but nodded. “Okay.” She said.

“Don’t worry Elizabeth. Best friends can still have loads of fun.” William told her.

“Like tickling?” Elizabeth asked with a smile.

William nodded and gave her side a couple light tweaks. “Like tickling.” William replied.

Elizabeth giggled and smiled before getting up and running up to Michael. “Your turn Michael!” Elizabeth yelled, before tickling the back of his knees.

“HehEHEHEY! IHIHI’M HOHOLDIHING AHAHA CAHAHAMEHEHERA!” Michael laughed and ran away. Michael leaned over the couch and placed the camera on there, before he laid himself onto the ground.

“TICKLE PILE!” Chris declared as he ran to Michael.

While Michael was getting doggy piled and tickled by his siblings, William and Henry walked away from the living room.

Henry grabbed William’s hand and put a finger on Will’s lips. “Let’s take a detour.” Henry whispered. He walked William over to the nearby storage closet in the Afton house, and closed the door behind them. The moment the door was closed, William and Henry made every moment count. Henry treated William like the greatest treasure he has ever held in his grasp. They kissed, they touched, they made love, and they did it all in a matter of minutes. The world seemed to slow down for the two of them. And right before they opened up the closet door…William whispered this:

“Are you free this Saturday, after the birthday party?”

[mimssides]

Life on Crow Avenue: Part 22

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___

Lunch was going well this Friday and Virgil was talking with Logan about good books on pet care for families and kids who wanted to help with the training of their pets. Because of that he almost missed Roman asking Remus about changing the working hours.

“Why would you want to change the opening and closing times?” Virgil asked a little anxiously even though he did not know why he felt anxious right now.

Roman was reacting quicker than Remus was and turned to Virgil with a gentle smile on his lips.

“Oh, we’re thinking about hiring someone working part-time for the store. Ideally, they could also help us with the taxes and stuff but just a helping hand would be a nice start. And if we had help, we could maybe do an evening sale once a week or and open on Saturdays,” Roman explained and suddenly all were staring at him.

Logan, Virgil and Janus seemed a little taken aback while Patton looked slightly overwhelmed though happy. Curiously he let his eyes rest on Remus and saw him subtly nod towards his direction. Patton beamed. The twins had had a talk yesterday night and he felt so happy that things finally were turning around for them. They truly deserved it.

“So, you could maybe have some more free time, I assume?” Patton offered after another beat of silence and Roman directly caught onto his line of reasoning.

“Yeah,” Roman agreed with a wide smile, “that was the plan! We never had that luxury before but I think that we could try to treat ourselves now, right Emi?”

Remus leaned back in his chair and looked uncharacteristically blank from Roman to Patton before he gave a slow nod and added: “Yeah. That’s the idea. The flowers sales are working well and we have a steady number of returning customers. It’s not a bad investment to employ someone now, when were still having everything under control. It’s the best time to make them familiar with the shop.”

“I wasn’t aware that your store was going this well,” Logan said and eyed the brothers with furrowed brows.

At that Remus’s odd behaviour stopped and he snickered, while Roman gasped offendedly. With astounding speaking speed Roman began to rattle down about the flower delivery service, the decoration for different holidays and celebrations, they provided as well as all the advertisements he had made and was still making on social media and the several posters and flyers he had hung up on community boards and distributed around a few retirement homes as well in parks around the aera.

“When did you have time to do all that?” Janus asked as Roman ended and began to eat the pasta he had prepared for them today.

Chewing and gesticulating with his fork Roman answered: “Before the move we had a few days, because we packed everything up rather quickly and then I got to design a few things on our laptop. And when we came here, I did the footwork, when Rem had a bit of help from the movers to get the store in order. It’s an important part of business and mouth to mouth advertisement is really good with clientele but especially older clientele, like ours. And we can’t stop now just because it’s going well. We’ve gotta go with the time and make sure we’re still what our customers want and need.”

“So, you’re basically your own advertisement department?” Janus asked frowning.

“Yeah. It’s important for business. I want to eat and for us to have a home. Can’t be slacking off, can I? Also, I like doing it. Our teacher always let me design new posters for the store and even paid for a and editing program that I still use because I was really good at it. It’s a fun change from – Oh, do you think I could hang up a job application ad at the board from the theatre group? Or would Rodriguez not like that?”

Janus almost had a whiplash from the sudden change of topic but then confirmed that Roman very likely wouldn’t have any objections against that. Roman seemed to be more than happy about it and the group returned to their lunch and previous conversations.

___

A week later Janus and Roman went to the meeting of their theatre group. Roman had offered to drive him, so Virgil didn’t have to or that Janus didn’t have to drive himself, as he apparently wasn’t a good driver and didn’t like to drive. To Janus it was a rather welcome development and he liked sitting on the co-driver’s seat and watching Roman behind the wheel.

When they arrived, nothing was out of the ordinary; they greeted their friends, asked how everyone was, just the causal small talk until all where here and they could start with the current meeting.

The time flew by and soon their meeting had reached the end. They were all sticking around for a bit and Roman took his chance to talk with Rodriguez about the ad he wanted to hang up and went to talk with him in the backroom where they stored some props. Janus used that opportunity to gather the rest and finally speak with Samantha.

“Okay, I need to be quick but I have a small request, Sammy dearest,” Janus began and the whole group was already curiously listening.

“What is it Jay?” Samantha asked rather suspiciously of the sweet tone.

Unbothered by her visible distrust Janus answered: “You will be out of town at the 4th, as you usually are, I assume?”

“Yeah, I just wanted to remind you all of-”

“Do me a favour and do not do that. I would like to surprise Roman with something. And as I know him, he won’t let himself have some additional downtime which means I will have to trick him into it. And for that I could use the meeting as an excuse, if you would not inform him that it’s not taking place.”

Samantha blinked several times before she frowned at him and raised an eyebrow in a disapproving manner.

“I won’t help you seduce this him, Jay. I’m not an accomplice to your playboy stick,” she told him.

Janus let out a groan and he shot a vicious look the tree women that snickered at his predicament.

“For once I’m not trying to do that, Sam! He – He needs something for himself and I doubt that a one-night stand is what that is or that he would even be interested in that. I really just want him to have something nice. He’s been through a lot lately and I don’t think he’s really taking care of himself. Just don’t say anything to him. I’ll do the rest. It’s all I ask of you.”

Samantha scrunched her nose. She wouldn’t say she was Janus’s friend but she liked the man well enough. He was a cynical and sarcastic character and he was a decent improviser and actor. And she did respect him, despite his casual anecdotes of sleeping with random men once in a while. She looked over his shoulder and saw Roman and Rodriguez coming back.

Roman was not any random man to her. He was charming and passionate about what they were doing here. He was definitely talented but more importantly he was a hard worker. He tried harder than the others and put a lot more effort and time in the little practices they did. And other than that, she simply liked him. So, she took a leap of faith and nodded to Janus and shot the rest of them a look to keep their mouths shut about this.

Gratefully, Janus gave her a nod of acknowledgement before he turned towards Roman who walked towards him with a big smile.

“I assume, I will have to wait as you are hanging up your flyer?” Janus asked playfully and Roman shoved him softly.

“A flyer? What for?” Renee asked.

Roman turned towards the middle-aged woman. She was Celia’s friend and drove her here. Curiously she watched as Roman showed her the piece of paper he was going to hang up close to the door.

“Job application? You look for someone working in your store?”

Roman nodded and explained: “Yes! It’s going well and we could use a helping hand.”

Renee’s eyes wandered over the paper and she looked back up at him.

“This is a part-time job for a flower shop, do I see that right?”

“Yes. If you know someone who would be interested, please let them know! The payment and workload will be discussed in the interview with me and my brother, if you were wondering,” Roman explained as his tone got a little more serious.

Renee nodded and studied the paper a little longer. The she glanced back up at him and scratched the side of her nose.

“I used to work in a flower boutique and my youngest is up to college now. I’ve got the time for a job to be honest but I’d like to know why you decided to hire now? You haven’t been open very long, not even a year, as I understand it. Why didn’t you hire someone from the beginning or do it later?”

Janus watched Roman’s expression grow serious. The others hadn’t seen him like that before. Even when he plays a serious character it has no resemblance with the person that was standing here in front of them now. This, Janus assumed, was businessman Roman. The Roman that was concerned with his and his brother’s survival and would do what it takes to get them through.

And suddenly it slipped. He grew softer again and looked sheepishly to the side before telling her patiently: “We are writing black numbers and have already established a number of returning customers. But it is getting a bit much since it requires both of us to work with little to no breaks. So, it is a decision for my and especially my brother’s mental health. If you are interested in the position, further information will be disclosed at the given time.”

Renee looked at him rather surprised. Roman simply cracked a grin and huffed, walking past her towards the entrance where he could hang up the ad.

“But do not apply if you’re not a hard worker! We won’t take you just because I know you and you have some free time to fill!” he called over his shoulder and Cecilia and a few others started to laugh while Renee didn’t look too amused about that comment.

Janus just looked after him and let his words from before go through his head. There had been something hanging around the twins and Janus hadn’t been able to point his finger on it. Now he had something to go off and when Roman and he told the others goodbye and drove back home, Janus took the chance to make sure he was assuming the right thing.

“I suppose that there would be a reason as why you wouldn’t tell me and you certainly don’t have to now, but did something happen with Remus and you that you are doing this for your mental health?” Janus asked as they stopped at a red light.

Finger tapping. Roman’s fingers were tapping on the wheel and his eyes directed to the street while he occasionally glanced to the rear mirrors. He pressed down the gas pedal as the red light went green and Janus assumed that this was the end of the conversation. But as the had left the crossroad, Roman cleared his throat and Janus turned to look at him.

“Rem’s going to a therapist every Thursday. He scheduled it himself, made all the calls. I only learnt about it when he asked me if he could leave earlier to go to the meeting. He isn’t super comfortable to tell everyone that he is going, which is why we hadn’t said anything yet. So, please don’t tell Virgil or Logan.”

Janus faltered. He hadn’t expected that. He hadn’t expected to see Remus going through with it. Not that he didn’t want he to get better but the possibility of Remus actually trying to do some work on his mental health had seemed so impossible in his mind.

“Is the silence a sign of disbelief?” Roman asked with a grin.

With a fake cough Janus tried to regain his composure.

“I wouldn’t say disbelief...”

“It’s fine. Quite frankly-” Roman paused as they stopped at another red-light and looked to Janus with such a unbelieving and yet relieved expression – “I’d had lost hope a good while ago. For him truly getting better. Parts of my head already trying to accommodate myself to a life where he no longer would be. Not that I think I could live a life without him but – Well. Now he’s trying and I think it’s worth to try and believe in him.”

Janus was left speechless. Roman was a lot of things; brave, enthusiastic, idealistic, hot-headed and a hard worker. He was not a quitter. He was not a guy like Janus who gave up when he realized something would get too complicated or too hard.

But maybe that thought wasn’t quite fair to Roman. Because Roman was human. He had lived a rather eventful and traumatizing life; he had fought his way up to this very moment but how often had he fallen back? How often did he fail at the things he deemed too important to fail at? Even the hardest optimist had their limits. And Roman had almost lost his brother four times now. The only thing that he had been able to rely on for so long. And Roman had just told him something that Remus had explicitly told Roman not to tell other people.

“Why did you tell me?” Janus asked as they reached their destination and Roman had parked his car.

Roman turned and looked at him while unbuckling his seatbelt. He met Janus’s gaze and paused in his movements for a minute.

“I am scared too. Not only him. This feels like a last chance and it’s nagging on my brain. I needed to tell someone who isn’t him or Pat. And so, I told you. Because I trust you.”

Janus just stared into Roman’s dark brown eyes. He wasn’t sure if he was still breathing or if he had stopped but in this moment he didn’t care. He couldn’t care. All his mind was telling him in this moment was that he was looking at Roman, who trusted him and that he was entirely uncertain as of why he did trust him.

“I don’t understand,” Janus said with a dry mouth. “I - I acted inconsiderately after Remus’s attempt. I was not helpful to you in that moment when you needed me most and-”

“That was this evening. That one evening. And yeah, it was a big thing but it was big for us all. Stressful for us all. And you have your story and baggage too. I cannot expect of you to act perfectly in that situation. And I don’t. Not when you excelled in every moment after. You were kind and understanding and I appreciate it a lot. You let me hold your hand. You came for me and it’s been a while since anyone came just for me.”

Nothing terrible should happen to Roman ever again. No one should ever hurt him again. He should never be in danger again. And Janus would do whatever was in his power to secure that he decided in that very moment, as he looked into Roman’s eyes and just gave a nod before he got out of the car.

They parted ways. Janus got ready for the set in James’ bar and after he had played for the night, he sat down to the gang’s usual table. Listened to Logan talk with Roman over classic literature, greeted Virgil when he joined them later on and made sure to keep an eye on Roman for the whole evening.

___

Virgil and Janus had decided to have a movie night this Saturday evening and Janus was now in the kitchen getting the second batch of chips during one of the cheaper vampire movies he had ever seen in his life. And due to his nephews love of such movies, he had seen a fair share of them.

Whistling a tune Janus checked his phone and to his dismay found another message of Juno. She had been on his case for the last few days and normally he had little problem to blend her badgering out, but not when it was about this. He sighed, pushed the message away and got back to Virgil in the living room. Unceremoniously, he flicked the light switch on and got Virgil’s attention.

With a frown Virgil looked over and as Janus waved with his phone, while putting the chips bowl down on their coffee table, he had a hunch what was going on.

“Did Mom write you about something?” Virgil asked and pulled his legs onto the couch to hug them against his chest.

Janus clicked his tongue and put his hand next to the bowl before he bitterly smirked to Virgil.

“I get that she’s your Mom and that she worries and that you talk with her about stuff that weighs you down,” Janus began in the calmest voice he could muster. “But did you really have to talk with her about what happened to the twins? She’s bugging me about it since you did and asks regularly if something else happened and if it worries you or makes you sick.”

Virgil’s expression darkened the more Janus spoke and when he had finished Virgil pressed his face against his knees and groaned in agony.

“I told her not to freak out! I really said that I’m fine, uncle J! I – I just- I’m sorry she’s giving you a hard time! I just wanted to talk with her about – about you know? We almost lost Remus and we had no idea! It – it-” Virgil tried to explain but couldn’t quite finish.

Sighing Janus moved closer to his nephew and put his hand on his knee, drawing little circles on it.

“I get it, chief. I do. It’s a heavy load those two brought with them. And you were brave enough to still choose to interact with them, while I shied away from it at first. I’m just annoyed by her, you know. She always dots you and she really isn’t talking nicely about neither Roman nor Remus even though neither is responsible for all of that. She cannot see that though and maybe you could try and not mention them too much to her for the moment? Just so I could get a little peace of mind for now?”

“Yeah, sure… I’m sorry about her. She always makes it hard on you, even though you’re not responsible for me.”

Janus smiled and Virgil looked up again and rested his chin on his knees.

“You’re her only baby. She’s worried,” Janus replied and ruffled through his hair with a fond grin. “Not everyone has the best son on earth, you know.”

“Oh, shut up!” Virgil squealed and hid his head again by pressing it against his knees.

Janus snickered and put the movie back on to get Virgil out of hiding. It worked and the two continued watching the movie in silence. Virgil ended up huddling against Janus’s side and he kept “stealing” chips from his bowl even though Janus had it brought for the two of them.

“Are you worried about her disliking Roman?”

Janus looked over to Virgil with a frown. His nephew smirked a little and continued: “Because she might give you shit once you’re together with him?”

Groaning Janus shoved Virgil to the side and listened him giggle at his theatrics just to shove him back into the upper arm. Janus bickered for a moment to which Virgil only rolled his eyes and eventually flicked his arm again, so Janus would stop.

“Listen,” Virgil said as Janus rubbed his arm in pretended pain, “it’s fine that you like him.”

“I do not.”

“Yes, you do and don’t interrupt me. He’s a sweet guy. And you keep insisting that he doesn’t need a relationship now but you shouldn’t decide for him if that’s the case. He should get a say in it too. I mean like, if I shouldn’t get doted on, he shouldn’t either, am I right?”

Janus said nothing to that and Virgil knew that he had one this argument. He settled down again and they kept watching the end of the movie before putting in Mary Poppins after Janus’s request.

___

@varthandi

@sammy-is-obsessed / @exhaustedfander

@alexisrealgay

@softie-sushi

@wolfs-feder

@just-a-neoclassical-painting

@winter-jay-official

@a-ghostlight-for-roman

@mychemically-imbalanced-romance

@whattheremus

Tagged for this fic:

@frawkeye

@arodynamic-enby

@espepspes

@bullet-tothefeels

@fukindork

@shadeofadye

@magic-but-its-green

@a-non-binary-pan

@simone-the-weird-person

[ghosttotheparty]

say  my name and say it twice (cotton candy skies)

17. also on AO3 chapter sixteen

The drawings go with Lotte’s above his desk, but there’s one he puts elsewhere. While most of the drawings are pinned up, between, above, and under Lotte’s, stuck with colourful pins and washi tape, there’s one he pins on the wall above his bedside table.

It’s a watercolour ladybug, and he’s barely stopped looking at it sincere he got home, barely stopped admiring the soft colours, the light pencil just barely visible under the paint. He puts it up first, before looking at it and smiling fondly, then moving to his desk with the folder.

As he carefully pins a drawing of a sunflower, he hears a knock at his door. It’s gentle, but firm, which tells him it’s Lotte. (His mom’s are gentle and tentative, usually accompanied by a soft “Jens?” and she waits before he calls for her to come in. His dad never knocked before throwing the door open.) The door opens slightly (he doesn’t look, but hears a creak), and he says “Come in,” before it opens all the way.

Lotte doesn’t say anything, just stands next to Jens’s desk as he kneels on it, watching as he pushes pins into the wall.

“You didn’t do those,” she states after a minute, when he puts up a sketch of a butterfly, under a butterfly by Lotte.

“No,” he says, pausing and leaning back to look at it, making sure it’s straight. “They’re Lucas’s.”

“The FaceTime guy?”

He chuckles softly, picking up the next one, a watercolour of treetops.

“Yeah, the FaceTime guy. He said he tried to go with your theme.”

She steps away, looking around as she processes what he said.

“He’s been here?”

Jens freezes, his eyes wide, his hand still, holding up the painting, and he grins.

“Yeah, he came once.” He turns and looks at her. “He said you’re very talented.”

She smiles after a second and he looks back to the wall, pushing a blue pin into the drawing.

“Why is this one over here?”

He turns and she’s sitting on his bed crisscross, pointing at the ladybug.

“It’s my favourite.”

He picks up the last one, a caterpillar on a leaf, and holds it up, unsure of where to place it.

“Why?”

“It’s pretty.” He sits back, kneeling, and looks at her again. “Makes me think of you.”

He smiles when she giggles after a second and then holds the drawing up again.

“Where do you think this one should go?” he asks, and she gets up, coming to stand next to him and looking.

She hums as she thinks and then points, under one of her flowers.

“Perfect.” He places it and holds up a pin. “You wanna do it?”

She climbs up next to him and carefully takes the pin, pushing it into the wall and smiling.

---

Jens can’t hear the sound of his skateboard over the pavement through his headphones blasting loud music, that could be too loud for eight in the morning. But it’s fine.

He skids to a stop outside the school, kicking the board up and catching it as he pulls his headphones down to hang around his neck and then reaches into his pocket to pause the music. There’s a text from Lucas that he hadn’t seen, didn’t feel the phone vibrate as he skated.

good luck at school, nerd see you tonight💕

Jens laughs to himself, skating his head as he tucks the board under his arm and adjusts his grip on the phone as he responds.

🥰🥰🥰

He tries to wipe his smile away as he puts his phone back, walking past groups of students standing in circles until he sees the guys, also standing in a circle.

“Hey,” he says as he hits Robbe gently with his skateboard, and they all shake his hand (after Robbe smacks him).

“Hey, Jens—”

“Hey, Moyo,” Jens interrupts, like he’s greeting him for the first time, turning to him and smiling as Moyo gives him a discontented look.

“I have a question.”

“I could have an answer.” There’s a pit in his stomach that he ignores. It grows there every time someone says something like that. I have a question, we have to talk, anything like that. Freaks him out.

Moyo fishes his phone out of his pocket and they all wait as he opens something on it.

“Is this you?”

He holds his phone up and there’s an Instagram post open, a slightly blurry of who is obviously Jens, in his orange jacket, his hands covering his face partially.

His heart drops for a second, knowing some kind of secret he has is being ripped away from him, but it raises and warms when he realises what he’s looking at: a photo of him taken by Lucas, a random snapshot as Jens pretended to beatbox, blurring from Jens’s movement and Lucas’s laughter.

Jens’s face softens as he reads the caption.

my dancer

“Yeah, that’s me.”

Robbe and Aaron lean over his shoulder, looking, and Moyo leaves it up for them to see.

“Whose account is that?” Aaron asks curiously and Moyo takes the phone back, looking at it.

“Mm… I’m not gonna tell you.”

For a few reasons.

“Come on, I know you know.”

“Yeah, I do know, but I’m not gonna tell you.”

Aaron frowns, dropping his shoulders.

“I’m not, so don’t even try with the puppy dog eyes,” Jens says, tapping the end of Aaron’s nose, and Aaron rolls his eyes, giving up.

“What’s the ‘my dancer’ thing mean?” Moyo asks, looking up from his phone.

“It’s an inside joke,” Jens says instinctively, the words out his mouth before he even processes the question.

And then he regrets it, as Moyo says, “Oh, okay,” and looks back at his phone, as Robbe tells Aaron that Sander is working on a (legal) mural at his school, a continuation of a conversation Jens had missed.

The pit is back, even though he knows it’s fine. That Moyo is texting someone (probably Noor, not that he’d admit it), not looking at the account, that Robbe and Aaron and talking about Sander, that none of them are thinking about the account or the caption anymore.

But it won’t go away, won’t stop eating away at him, and he can feel his pulse quicken, his breathing quicken, his hands shake in his pocket and his grip on the board shift repeatedly. The guys’ voices seem to get louder, along with the voices of all the other students scattered around them, the sound of doors slamming open and shut, the sound of birds singing, students dropping their backpacks, and laughing.

“It’s not a joke,” he bursts, looking at the guys, who stop and look at him, confused, their minds already far past the topic. He stares back, unsure of what to say, until Robbe breaks the silence.

“What?”

“The—The dancer thing,” he stammers, shoving his hand deeper into his pocket anxiously. “It’s not a joke. I’m a dancer.”

They stare at him blankly.

“But you were so shit during our hip hop video,” Moyo says.

“That’s—” Jens snorts, dropping his head and shoulders, easing up a bit. “That’s because it was hip hop.”

It’s quiet again as they look at him like they’re studying him.

“Waist, so—” Aaron says, stopping and closing his eyes, waving his hands. “You’re a dancer? But when? How?” He looks like his mind just exploded, and Jens laughs.

“Thursdays.”

And there it is.

They all react differently.

Aaron gasps, reaching out and grabbing Jens, pulling him back and forth as Jens laughs. Robbe’s jaw drops and he stares, seemingly processing what Jens just revealed. Moyo lets out a loud “Oh!” and points at him, looking from Jens to Robbe to Aaron to Jens.

“Wait, what the fuck?” Moyo exclaims, pushing Aaron out of the way and gripping Jens’s shoulders. “You dance on Thursdays?”

“I mean, I practise every day, but I go to the studio on Thursdays.”

“Today?” Robbe asks.

“I—Yeah, today. I go home and grab my stuff before going.”

“Can we come?” Aaron asks.

“No, Aaron.”

“Oh.”

“Wait. what kind of dance is it?” Moyo asks, pushing Jens like he’s offended.

“Ballet.”

They go quiet again.

“What the fuck is going on this morning?” Moyo says, and Jens laughs again, harder, feeling lighter, the relief of not keeping this secret lifting the weight of it off his shoulders.

“Okay, so you’re a ballerina,” Aaron states after they’ve all taken a second.

“Yes.”

“Show us.”

“I…”

He digs his phone out of his pocket and goes to the photos app, holding it so they can’t see as he scrolls through selfies taken with Lucas, candids of Lucas looking at his phone while sitting next to Jens, blurry pictures of Lucas covering his face.

“I don’t have any videos, but I…” he trails off again, hesitating. He looks around, at students talking and looking at their phones. He looks back at the guys, all looking at him expectantly.

“Okay,” he sighs, handing his skateboard to Robbe, who takes it, confused, and Jens drops his bag to the ground. He steps out into an open place, looking around again. No one’s looking except them.

So he does a double pirouette, the same he did for Lucas last week. But this time he doesn’t stumble. He lands it, looking at the guys, all three of their jaws dropped, and he laughs, quickly going back over to them.

“That was graceful as hell,” Aaron says as Jens grabs his bag from the ground, and Jens laughs harder.

“How long have you been doing ballet?” Robbe asks, handing him the skateboard.

“Since I was kid,” Jens says, shrugging.

“And this mystery Instagrammer has seen you dance?” Moyo asks.

Jens hums.

“Seen me do what I just did.” He avoids pronouns.

“And you’re not gonna tell us who it is,” Moyo says flatly.

“No. But can you tell me the username?” Jens asks, and Moyo holds his phone up again so Jens can see it.

He repeats it to himself as the bell rings, over and over and over until he can practically hear it, like someone is whispering it to him as he falls behind the guys, holding the skateboard against his chest so it doesn’t hit people as they bustle around him, through the front door.

As he walks down the hallway, he searches for the account, the letters still running through his mind.

There are two pictures of him.

And a drawing.

Which makes his heart fucking swell.

And the captions…

The caption on a photo of Jens’s back as he walks in the opposite direction (he remembers the exact night it was taken. It’s like he can’t forget anything when it comes to Lucas.) reads falling.

Jens smiles, setting his board under his chair and sitting.

He thinks he might be falling too.

[writingwithadinosaur]

“Did It Hurt?” - Oneshot

“Did It Hurt?” - Oneshot

My Masterlist - Here

My Tag List - Here

Lucifer Morningstar x Reader

Word Count: 2,262

Key: Y/N = Your Name, H/C = Your Hair Color, E/C = Your Eye Color

Warnings: Cursing, Talk about violence

Summary: Lucifer finally tells you the truth about his scars.

Author’s Note: I’ve been wanting to do Lucifer fics for awhile, and this idea slowly worked its way out of my brain. It is not beta-read, but I hope you enjoy it! I may already have a few ideas for more stories in this fandom. <3 

If you would like to be tagged in any of my future pieces, check out my tag list above and let me know! And as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

<3

- DreaSaurusREX

~~~~~~~~

Lucifer had come home from working a case with Detective Decker a few minutes ago. He had dirt all over him and his suit when he came in. Not wanting to know the specifics, you just told him to go shower while you finished up. He nodded, gave you a kiss, and was off. 

While preparing dinner for you and your boyfriend, you had to pinch yourself and make sure that your life was real. You were living in Los Angeles, dating Lucifer Morningstar who despite his reputation, treated you extremely well, and you felt safe. Who would have thought that that would even be a possibility for you?

In the midst of you zoning out, Lucifer had come out in some pajama bottoms and snuck his arms around your waist, hugging you from behind. 

“Hello there, beautiful.” After the initial jump, you lightly smacked his arm before turning around in his arms to face him.

“Well hell-looo there!” You couldn’t help the smirk as you found Lucifer shirtless, which was always a nice surprise. He chuckled as he leaned down to kiss your forehead. He also reached behind you and stuck his finger in the dish you were working on, bringing it to his lips as you yet again smack his arm.

“Hey! Luci!”

“Whatever that is, it is delicious, love.” You couldn’t stay even pretend mad at him for long. Laughing you just shake your head and go back to cooking. 

“Thank you, babe.” He places another kiss to the side of your head. You watch him walk away and make his way to the other side of the counter, grabbing something from the expansive collection of alcohol to go with dinner. While you couldn’t help admiring him, your eyes land on the two large and curved scars on his shoulders, the only scars you’ve ever seen on him.

You had seen the scars on his shoulders before. They were kind of hard to miss. And you were happy that he was comfortable enough around you to not hide them. But you still had no idea how he got them. You knew it was something that he didn’t want to talk about because you had asked him multiple times in the past, but you would be lying if you said that you weren’t curious and a little bit worried.

“You know, one day you are going to tell me the truth about those scars.” Lucifer turned to you with his eyebrow quirked up in a challenging manner.

“How do you know I haven’t already told you the truth?”

“Impossible.” You shake your head with a smile as you take the pan off the stovetop and reach for some plates.

 “Oh really?” Lucifer brought his chosen liquor to his seat on the other side of the counter, pouring himself and you a glass.

“Yes! Because every time I’ve asked, you’ve said something different! And none of those stories seem to be real.”

You finish plating dinner and turn to give Lucifer his portion, expecting to see a smirk or some sort of look that says “Well, I guess you’ll never know.” But instead, you see him looking into his drink, his face showing a mix of worry and uneasiness. Sliding the plate in front of him, you try to break his gaze from the cup. 

“You know I’m still going to love you no matter what happened to cause those, right?” Without looking up, his tone got a bit more serious with a twinge of what sounded like pain.

“Don’t make promises you are unsure of, dear.”

“Then tell me what happened and put my promise to the test.” You reach for your glass and take a sip, loving the taste but not able to relish in it because your worry for Lucifer takes precedence. 

You can see him mulling something over in his head. He eventually just runs his hands over his face and sighs out a shuddered breath. You move around the counter and hop up on it, you get close enough to put your hand on his cheek and make him look at you. It broke your heart to see whatever trauma that those scars left in his eyes.

“Hey. If it makes you this upset, you don’t have to tell me. I want to know, but if it's going to hurt you, I don’t--”

 “I am Lucifer.” His eyes were closed but pointed down towards the counter. The confused chuckled that escaped you was uncontrolled.  

“We’ve been dating for awhile now, I think I know your name pretty well, ba--”

“No.” He took your hand from his cheek and from your lap and held them in both of his hands. “I am Lucifer Morningstar, Bealezbub, Mephistopheles, the prince of darkness, the Devil! I am…” He finally looked you in the eye, “the Devil.”

You sat there next to him, looking into his eyes to see if there were any indications that this was a joke. But you saw that he truly believed that he was the Devil. And surprisingly it made sense to you. Everything about him pointed towards that being true, but you hadn’t seen any sort of proof other than the genuine reactions he is showing right now as he tells you.

“Okay… Um… I’m not saying that I don’t believe you, but--”

“You don’t believe me.” His hands, which are still holding yours, drop slightly as he looks away dejectedly. You squeeze them and make him look at you.

“I’m saying that I need some proof. As much as I love you and I know you wouldn’t lie to me, I am just asking if there is anything you can show me.”

Lucifer’s leg begins to bounce with anxiety as he thinks about his next course of action. He knew that telling you would lead to this, he was just scared of the possible fear and rejection. He truly loved you, which is something he never thought was possible. He didn’t want to lose you. But he had to be honest with you. 

He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, focusing on his arm. You watch his face, looking for any sign that this is going to far for him. When he meets your gaze again, his normally dark eyes are now a vicious red color. 

You flinched and you saw that it hurt Lucifer. You didn’t know what you expected, but it definitely wasn’t that. 

His eyes looked down at his arm. Following his gaze, you see that his skin was now more red. His veins looked like they were glowing under his skin. 

“Oh my god!” You couldn’t help the shock as you dropped his hands and covered your gasp. 

You took a moment to look at it as he reached for his glass and took a larger than normal drink. Your body moved faster than your brain as you held out a hand to him. Lucifer was confused, but you slowly reached out more until you were delicately holding his arm. It was warmer than a normal human, but not scalding. He let you move it, watching you look at the different shades of red of his true skin. 

After a few minutes of looking at his arm, your gaze goes back to his eyes. As soon as you make eye contact, he takes a visibly nervous breath in and holds it, trying to figure out what you were thinking. He closed his eyes and quickly made his skin and eye color back to “normal.” 

“Okay. So the stuff that I ignored in church growing up is--”

“Real. Well,” Lucifer tilts his head side to side. “most of it at least.”

Your brain exploded with questions. All of them were out of curiosity. There was no fear or overwhelming nature to any of them. 

“Okay… So the whole heaven and hell thing. That’s real?”

 Lucifer spent the next half hour patiently listening to all of your questions and answering them the best he could while the two of you ate. He got more and more comfortable the more he talked about it and saw that you were accepting them, accepting him.

“So what does all of this have to do with the scars on your back?” Your voice was a bit softer, knowing that this wasn’t going to be the easiest thing for him to answer. Lucifer’s change in demeanor said that you were right. 

“The short version? I had wings. But when I left Hell and came here, I wanted to leave that all behind. So I…” He shifted in his seat, slightly rolling his left shoulder as if he still felt the weight of his wings, “I cut them off.”

You really weren’t sure how to respond. You understood the reasoning behind it, but you had no idea what that felt like. You had no way to relate to it or know how to try and help Lucifer feel better about the situation. All you could do was softly say, “I’m sorry.” Which got a chuckle out of Lucifer.

“Why in the world are you apologizing, dear? It's not like you had any part in it.”

“I know, but I just can’t imagine all of the frustration and sadness that went into a choice so painful.”

Lucifer knew how empathetic you could be, it was one of the reasons you were so appealing to him. You fell silent as you drank the last of your drink, Lucifer turned to completely face you.

“ I will say that you’re not reacting quite like how I thought you would. Usually when people find out about celestial beings being real, they go insane or end up too overwhelmed to handle it. But you. You are very... quiet.” 

Lucifer needed to know how you felt about him and his true self. He was preparing himself for heartbreak, for you to get up, say something along the lines of “this is too much,” and then leave him.

Before he could think more negative thoughts, you spoke up.

“I’m just trying to fully absorb that God and angels and demons are real and that I’m actually in love with the Devil. It may take awhile, bu--”

“So you do still love me?” You meet Lucifer’s eyes. He looks so hopeful and shocked, but still too cautious and nervous to let himself feel the happiness of what you just said. You turn to face him completely now, taking his once red head in yours. 

“Yes. It's going to take a hot minute to really solidify all of this new stuff in my brain. And I’m definitely going to still be surprised if you ever go all demon eyes on me. But yes. I love you, Lucifer Morningstar.”

A very shuddered exhale leaves the now thankful smile on his face. You stand up and close the distance between the two of you, standing between his legs as he sits on the bar stool. He doesn’t wrap his arms around your waist until yours are around his neck. He is gentle with his embrace, burying his head in your neck. You can feel a tear or two hit the sensitive skin by your collar bone. 

You both stay like this for a minute or two. When you pull away a little bit, you take his face in both of your hands and lean in for a gentle kiss. Lucifer pulls you in closer, needed to feel all of this as validation. Letting it sink in that you do truly accept and love him for him.

You’re the one to break away one Lucifer seemed to relax and slowly go back to being his normal self. You sit back down and reach for the bottle on the counter, but Lucifer is already pouring you another drink. Smiling, you take the last bite of food that you have on your plate as a silent laugh leaves your nostrils. Lucifer notices.

“Laughing at my vulnerability now are we?”

“Oh god no! I just thought of one more question.”

“For now.”

“Yes, for now. I’m sure there will be others that pop into my head as time goes on.”

“Alright, what is your question?”

“Did it hurt?” You tried to be serious. Lucifer’s expression changed as if to say “isn’t it obvious?”

“What? When I cut off my wings? Yes! It's as if you were cutting off your arms, but a bit smaller, and on--.”

“No, no-- Not that, although that sounds awful. I meant…” You lean in a bit, Lucifer’s brow raises. “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” 

You had lost it. Your uncontrollable laughter echoed through the penthouse, and while the noise made Lucifer’s heart happy, he groaned in annoyance at the awful pickup line. He put his head in one hand, pointing the other to the elevator on the other side of the room.

“Get out.”

You knew he didn’t mean it, but you played along and stood up. Before you could get to paces away, a familiar hand grabbed yours and pulled you back towards him. You found your place between his legs, both your hands and his automatically find their familiar places, as if nothing had changed. 

Lucifer pulled you in closer and flashed his red eyes, making you jerk in his grasp. You both laughed and you lightly smacked his shoulder. 

“Rude.” 

“C’mon, love. It's a little funny.” He says through his trademark devilish smile as you both lean in for a kiss, ending the night better than he could have dreamed of.

[talkfastromance4]

For Your Eyes Only– bodyguard!ashton [Chapter Eleven]

Summary: Ashton Irwin is the head of security for Princess Alouette who is a kind, gentle young woman. Secretly pining for one another, those feelings will soon come to light as an occurrence will change Alouette’s life forever, and Ashton’s.

Word count: 2,456

Warnings: swearing

Author’s note: There’s only ONE MORE chapter after this one and this fic will be complete! Thank you so much to those who have read and messaged me about this story. This is the first multi-chaptered fic I’ve started (and almost completed) Ashton and Alouette are near and dear to my heart. Thank you for joining me on their journey! There is a link to click on near the bottom. 

donate to my ko-fi here :)

Masterlist

Chap. 1 || Chap. 2 || Chap. 3 || Chap. 4 || Chap. 5 || Chap. 6 || Chap. 7 || Chap. 8 || Chap. 9 || Chap. 10

Alouette’s never been in or near the interrogation room that’s in the guard’s building. She wraps her arms around herself as Michael leads her inside, the walls are cement and the room beyond the two-way mirror is small and boxy. 

Bright fluorescent lights hum on beyond the glass as Michael presses a button next to her. There’s a large metal tale in the center with two chairs on opposite sides of the table. A large door is on the far wall.

“What’s his name?” Alouette asks softly, turning to Michael.

“Icarus Bram,” he sighs, turning on speakers and the intercom. 

The door she and Michael just walked through opens to reveal Luke.

“Hey Mike. Princess,” Luke smiles. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Alouette watches the big metal door swing open, an officer holds onto Icarus Bram and leads him to the table. He doesn’t look familiar to Alouette from her days with all those men. His hair is parted down the middle, dirty blond and unruly and he has a permanent smirk.

“I have to know why,” she responds, turning her gaze to Luke and Michael. 

“I’ll be in there with you the whole--”

“No. I need to do this on my own,” Alouette interrupts Michael. “He isn’t a threat.”

Michael sighs and exchanges a final look to Luke who shrugs lightly. “If he even appears to be violent, we’re coming in straight away.”

“Be careful,” Luke says, stepping aside so she can open the door.

Alouette takes a deep breath before pushing down the handle, swinging it open. Icarus smiles mirthlessly as she walks to her side of the table. The metal legs of the chair scrape on the cemented floor as she pulls it out and sits down. 

“Hello Princess,” he croaks leaning forward on the table, his hands clasped while his wrists are bound with handcuffs. “To what do I owe this pleasure?”

She eyes him, his voice now chiming a familiar bell. He was the mastermind behind the whole thing. She remembers hearing him through the speaker on the phones that the men used. 

“I think you know,” Alouette states calmly. “I’m here for answers. Answers that you won’t give to my guards.”

“And what makes you think I’ll give them to you?”

It’s Alouette’s turn to lean forward. 

“Because I’m the one you took, don’t you think I should know why?” Alouette’s voice is steely but inside she’s trembling. 

Icarus lets out a deep chuckle and rubs his hands together. 

“You aren’t as dim as people say you are, Princess. You really want to know why we did it?”

Alouette keeps her gaze steady but she can feel her heart pounding inside her chest. It makes the swans on her neck bounce lightly on her skin waiting in anticipation for his answer. 

“We wanted to see if we could take you,” he begins moving back against his chair and holds his hands up in the air as if presenting her with a prize, “and we did.”

Alouette fumes with anger, so much so that she feels her hands shake. The only reason he plotted this was because of his own personal challenge?

“That’s it?”

“That’s it. Shame your bodyguard boyfriend came ‘round, though. We were just about to get to the fun stuff--”

The door bangs open behind Alouette and before she can react, Ashton barrels across the table, grabs hold of Icarus’ head and slams it against the top. The sound of skin and bone striking against the hard metal table causes her to scream. She watches in surprise as Ashton grabs for him again but she grasps at his shirt.

“Ashton! Stop, stop!” Alouette screams and because she tells him to, he does.

He’s breathing heavily, eyes ablaze as he allows Alouette to pull him back to the door where Michael and Luke are watching, eyes wide. Icarus Bram’s officer comes in tugging him to his feet as Ashton leads Alouette to the door. 

She turns around and sees his nose and mouth is covered in blood. Ashton must have broken his nose. 

“You’re sentenced to isolation in prison for the rest of your life,” she tells him.

“I didn’t do those things to you, Princess,” he spits the blood from his split lip.

“No, but your cohorts that you ordered did under your advisement,” Alouette fires back. Her voice is calm but her eyes are aflame with the rage inside her. “They’re dead, so you will take their time.”

“I didn’t touch you!” he shouts trying to fight off the officer just as another one enters the room to aid in restraining Icarus. 

“You wanted to see what you could do, this is what I can do,” her voice is laced with venom and Ashton pushes her lightly through the door. 

“What the bloody hell was that? How could you let her be in the same room as that bastard?!” Ashton shouts pointing his finger at Michael and Luke.

“I thought you knew!” Michael defends.

“If I knew, wouldn’t you think I’d be here?” Ashton roars.

“We thought she told you not to,” Luke responds quietly then glances to Alouette who is visibly shaken. “Princess--”

“Alou--”

“Angel,” Ashton says and holds his arms out so she can fall into them. She’s shaking and gasping for breath, her nails digging into the flesh of Ashton’s arms. 

“I think she’s having a panic attack,” Michael says.

“Alouette, look at me,” Ashton lets her slide to the floor, still bracing her in his arms. Her eyes are tightly closed and he cradles her face, thumbs rubbing the tears from her eyes. “Alouette, please, look at me.”

Her eyes flicker open, big and blue and full of fear before she focuses on Ashton, but she’s still choking for air. 

“You’ve got to breathe for me, deep inhale, c’mon . . .” he watches her shudder an intake of breath. “Good, now out.”

He breathes out with her and does the exercise a few more times until she’s breathing normally and her hold on his forearms loosen.

“I’m sorry, Ash, I--”

“Shh, shh. He didn’t touch you, did he?” he asks brushing her hair from her eyes and she shakes her head. He helps her rise to her feet, steadies her and holds her close.

“We really thought you knew, Ash. I wouldn’t have--”

“I know,” Ashton nods to Michael then to Luke. “We’ll talk about this later. Right now I want to get her out of here.”

•••••

“I’m sorry,” Alouette says for what seems like the twelfth time as they’re sitting on their swing by the lake. 

“You don’t have to keep apologizing,” Ashton smiles at her but it doesn’t meet his eyes. He’s fixing up her cup of tea; green, strong and three sugars.

“But you’re mad at me.”

She watches him stir the tea, clink it on the side and place it on the table before bringing the saucer to her. He sits down heavily and places his arm behind her shoulders, his hand cups her shoulder and he leans forward to kiss her temple.

“I’m not mad at you, I promise,” he hums on her skin and gives her one more kiss. He looks into her eyes then pulls on her bottom lip with his thumb before he kisses her softly. “I was more scared than anything.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t want him to bring you back to that awful place you were in. I didn’t want him to touch you or hurt you in any way. If there’s anyone I’m mad at it’s Michael for allowing you to speak with him,” he chuckles. 

“I swore him to secrecy and I asked the favor as a friend, please don’t be mad at him. He was only trying to help me.”

They sit in silence, quietly gliding to and fro watching the sun glitter on the small waves created by the wind. Alouette sips her tea delicately and enjoys the soft touches of Ashton’s fingers on her shoulder and neck. 

“Luke said you wanted to see me,” Princess,” Calum announces suddenly behind them. 

They both turn to him, Ashton in confusion and Alouette smiling.

“Yes, thank you. Can you tell Victor I’d like to make an address to the kingdom? I’d like it to be for three o’clock, it won’t be long,” she tells him.

Calum’s dark eyes flicker between her and Ashton, usually Ashton is the one to contact Victor and set up the contingencies. 

“Uh, yes. Yes, I can do that,” Calum clears his throat and nods, giving Ashton an apprehensive look. 

“And make sure to conference call my grandmére? I’ve discussed this with her on the phone and she should be here, even if it is through a monitor.”

“I’ll get to work on it right away, Princess,” Calum nods then does a small head bow. He gives Ashton one last look before retreating back to the palace, his phone already pressed to his ear. 

“I can do all that for you, Alouette. Why are you having Cal?” Ashton asks, placing his hand on her crossed knee. 

“I know you can, but I want you standing next to me when I give my address,” she says grasping his hand in hers, “as my partner.”

•••••

Alouette changed into a pretty lilac dress suit for the address. On the platform on the main steps of her palace she was joined by Ashton on her right side with Michael, Calum and Luke perched beyond them. Sydney is there as well amongst Alouette’s other advisors and her grandmére is on a larger screen behind. 

Queen Helene is also wearing a lilac dress with her crown atop her head. Victor nods at Alouette and she steps up to the podium where multiple microphones are placed. The reporters and other film crew standing below on the gravel stand to attention.

“Hello my fellow Chadrians,” Alouette begins eloquently. “I know this is very last minute and I’ve addressed what happened to me months ago, but I wanted to thoroughly explain my absence. It’s taken a long time for my body to heal from what happened during my kidnapping, and it’s taken even longer for my mind to heal.

“Earlier this morning, I spoke with the man who orchestrated my kidnapping. I needed answers and while I wasn’t put at ease for his reasoning, I have sentenced him to isolation in prison for the remaining days of his life. His name is Icarus Bram and to some of you, it may seem like an easy punishment. Some of you may want his head. Some of you may say I have no spine.

“I’m not unfamiliar with what has been said about me, that I am gentle and kind but also may appear to be flippant and dim sighted to what’s going on around me. I hope this will show you I am anything but those negative things. I promise you, that when I am announced as your Queen, I will rule with love but with an iron fist. I love my people and my country and if it wasn’t for this man standing next to me, I wouldn’t have the strength I have now.”

She turns to Ashton and holds out her hand, she hears the multiple clicks and flashes of cameras as he takes her hand. His hazel eyes glance to the reporters before he joins her near the podium. 

“Ashton Irwin is my head bodyguard, and he has been for the last four years. He’s the one who didn’t give up and rescued me. He’s the one I trust with my whole life and,” Alouette faces Ashton, “he’s the one I love.”

There’s gasps and shouts of questions but Ashton just smiles at Alouette. He squeezes her hand and she squeezes back, both of them assuring the other about the implications from her publicly confirming their relationship. 

“Quiet, quiet please! The Queen has something she’d like to say,” Sydney says into the microphone and smiles happily at her lady. 

“I have spoken with my granddaughter and Mr. Irwin frequently about their relationship. And while they have already been granted my blessing, I have also decided to change the decree that if you are of royal blood, you may marry whomever you decide. I’m very proud of my Alouette, as you all should be, and I am elated to be with you all next month for her coronation,” Queen Helene finishes with a smile and the screen goes dark. 

Questions erupt in uproars once more but Alouette explicitly said she would not be answering any of them. She’s still smiling proudly at Ashton as they retreat back into the palace, leaving the buzz behind them as they go back to their swing. 

•••••

A few days later after Alouette’s address, she and Ashton were standing at the edge of the small dock of the lake watching the two swans keep their one cygnet between them. Alouette loved watching them swim about and even brought some bread to feed them.

 Her announcement of their relationship is still front page news but Alouette couldn’t be happier. 

“Alouette,” Ashton says while she breaks off the last piece of bread and tosses it into the water. 

“Yes?” She watches the small bird nibble it up and when Ashton doesn’t respond, she turns around then gasps. 

Ashton is on his left knee with a small rose gold box in his hand. He swallows harshly, Adam's apple bobbing as he reaches with a shaky hand for her own. Alouette takes it softly, eyes on him.

“Becoming your head bodyguard was the best decision of my life. I fell in love with you four years ago and continue to fall even more in love with you every day. I will go to the ends of the earth for you and I will always be your confidante and your safe space. Will you grant me the greatest gift of becoming my wife?”

He pops open the ring box and Alouette gasps again through her tears as she sees the beautiful rose gold ring sparkle in the sun. 

“Yes, yes, a thousand times yes,” she whispers, pulling him to his feet so she can kiss him. It’s a tear stained kiss mixed in with smiles and giggles. He slides the ring on her finger and it fits perfectly. 

They’re kissing and hugging each other on the dock. Ashton is so happy he spins her around before letting her stand once more, his arms are still around her.

“I love you, my lady.”

“I love you too,” she smiles stroking his cheek with her left hand. The ring glints and shines. “Can I ask you something now?”

“Anything.”

“Will you be my knight?”

• • • •

Taglist: @galcalirwin @cashtonasff5sos @wokeupinjapanisabop @myloverboyash  @rotten-kandy @tea4sykes @jannimoeller3 @loveroflrh @iovehemmings @cxddlyash @princesslrh @here-for-the-uproars @katiaw2 @g-l-pierce @fairyintheglass @gosh-im-short @banditocth @dezzym17 @wildflowerxcth @lukeisbaby

[hannibalcatharsis-zero]

Allow me to share a little experience I had with season 4. 

Namely, and obviously, fully revolving around Berlin and Palermo's scene.

I didn't watch season 4 when it premiered. I wasn't that interested, and I knew that, if I didn't watch it during the weekend, I'd be fully spoiled when I went back to work on monday.

I actually didn't mind, and when I got there and saw everyone talking, I was actually just happy they were all so excited about it. And they were actually very considerate about spoilers. But I got excited with the whole thing because of them, and I turned to one of my colleagues and friend and asked him "So, tell me everything".

He begrudgingly humored me (he wanted me to see the show, but he also was itching to share his opinion) and told me every single thing of the season and his opinion on the whole thing. We talked about it almost the entire day (we were lucky to have simple stuff to do that day), and it was awesome.

Point here being.

He started it all by saying this, with a huge grin on his face: "Man, there's this one scene where Berlin goes HARDCORE sucking Palermo's mouth. You'll love it." and understandably, my reaction was something like this:

(actually I gasped loudly and was like WHAT THE FUCK!)

Still in utter disbelief that scene actually existed, I said "Holy shit Palermo must have had a heart attack! He loved Berlin so much!" And my colleague agreed, making a very funny description of what Palermo must have felt at that moment. Eventually, he said this: "That scene was great and one of the best of the whole season. Berlin is fucking badass."

This comment is what I really committed to mind. “Berlin is fucking badass.”

I work with a tonful of men, in an usually-typical-men environment. Lots of testosterone. You can imagine the amount of constant teasing and mocking they are constantly doing amongst themselves, and how often that revolves around calling each other gay or whatnot. Now, as I said, everyone was going around sharing their hype and another colleague comes by to talk to us about it. Of course the first thing our colleague tells my friend is: "What about that kissing scene huh?! That's your favorite out of the season I bet!" (Because that’s what men always tease others with. Of course they imply something ‘gay’) and my colleague replied "It was a pretty badass scene."

Our colleague visually staggered and said something like: "Yeah, I mean they're actors and that's all technical kissing and whatever" and of course went to usual territory of how he'd never do a scene like that even if they paid him and whatnot. But he didn’t seem critical of the scene on itself either, when confronted with someone who admitted the scene had a purpose that was great for the character. Of course, it involved an intimate moment between two men, but that, in itself, didn’t make it a bad scene. It wouldn’t have made it better either, if it didn’t have a point.

This exchange between my colleagues also committed to mind.

I'm sharing this not-so-little retelling of that monday because of these two reasons. That little exchange between two (male, heterosexual) colleagues and the openly approving opinion of one of them.

Berlin is a badass, my colleague said, because it wasn’t about shame or fear or being a phobe, and he shows that to Palermo in the best and most badass way he can. There’s no ‘heterosexuality so fragile’ feeling. He goes hardcore and unafraid to prove a point. They love each other, Palermo obviously loves Berlin in a different manner, and Berlin shows that he simply cannot reciprocate that, as much as he’d like to, because he simply isn’t gay.

I know many people in the fandom don’t agree with this and like shipping. I do too. I also full heartedly agree with my colleague, and Berlin is even more badass in my opinion. I’m not looking to offend anyone by sharing this, I just found it to be really cool to actually see in real life how two heterosexual men react and have a conversation about a homosexual scene, how some can be standardly-dismissive or mocking and still get visibly objective about it when confronted with less prejudice than they were expecting from the other party. Just wanted to share this. 

Final note: I saw that scene on that very day on youtube, unable to wait to get home and check it there, and when I got back to my colleague with the hugest grin of joy and disbelief (and more), my colleague laughed and said "You’ve already seen it, haven’t you? I knew you wouldn't be able to control yourself."

I say (and more) because this is a much more accurate representation of my reaction seeing the scene and then thinking of it in front of my colleague

[huffle-dork]

Curosity Killed the Cat (Part 7)

Desperation

Chapter 6: [x] Read from the beginning: [x]

———————————-

Henrik ushered Jackie into a private room and Jackie was quick to deposit his comatose brother on the bed. But, without wasting a beat he turns to Schneep and grabs his shoulders, his face displaying pure desperation.

“Hen- I need something to restrain him, now!”

Schneep shoved off his brother with a look, brushing off his coat. “Jackie what are you talking about? You must explain all these things before demanding things of me! What exactly is going on?”

“I promise I will explain,” Jackie pants, but he grabs his brother’s arm again with a tight grip, “But not until he’s restrained. I don’t know how long he’ll be out but he can’t get back out there until we figure this shit out. Just trust me!”

Henrik still looks skeptical and looks over to the knocked out magician, as if gauging how dangerous he really was. Jackie wanted to scream.

“Henrik!!”

The doctor covered his ears against Jackie’s shrill voice and finally threw up his hands. “Fine, fine!” He travelled up to Marvin’s bed and reached underneath, producing two lengths of straps. He wrapped the belts around Marvin’s middle and his legs before looking back to the hero and raising an eyebrow.

“Better?”

Jackie visibly slumped and nodded his head, finally allowing himself to flop into one of the nearby chairs and push his mask up on top of his head. “Y-Yes.. thank you doc.”

Dr. Schneep watched him deflate with a worried expression. Soon, he’s kneeling by Jackie’s side and rubbing his arm. “Jackie… what the hell happened?”

Jackie opens his mouth to start explaining when the door bursts open, revealing Chase rushing in. Jameson follows behind with a confused expression.

“What’s happening?! Is Marvin okay??” Chase asks with hysteria. “The news- there was all sort of shit on the news! Saying- there was a supervillain on the loose? Are you both alright??”

Jackie raised his hand to stop Chase’s rant, then throws a thumb in Marvin’s direction.

“...He’s the supervillain.”

The brothers’ eyes all widen in shock.

“What…?”

The red clad hero raises tired eyes and sighs, curling in on himself.

“...It was Marvin. He… I don’t know what happened. I should have told you all earlier… but I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt- that maybe this was just trauma from being kidnapped by Anti… but he kept getting… worse. He’s been holed up in his room- and using freaky purple magic. Chanting and reclusive and…”

The hero closed his eyes tight and shudders.

“One night… I saw… I saw him holding what looked like a Jack doll… and- he was saying… d-disturbing things. Talking about being… the one pulling the strings.”

Now it’s Schneep’s turn to shiver, his eyes showing fear at those words. He looks back to Marvin with a tight worried frown.

“What happened tonight?” Chase asks just barely above a whisper.

Jackie sighs heavily and holds his arms, as if it will protect him.

“He was… angry that I wanted to take a break from crime fighting. It’s been too much for me. But, he was insistent that we both needed to get back out there. He met me at work- and we had a huge argument. I… told him the truth. About how he’s scaring me- how I’m scared to get back out there so soon. How everything still hurt- and I was confused about how he was doing so well. He… was so determined though. Kept mentioning Anti.”

The superhero drew in on himself again, eyes starting to widen- like reliving the story could cause him to panic. The other boys looked at each other in concern- Jackie never shows fear like this… he’s the bravest one of the bunch.

“Marvin ran off- and a burglary happened downtown. When I got there… I ran into a panicking boy. He was so terrified and I thought it was because the robbers took him as a hostage to get away. But, he was scared of someone else.. someone in a cat mask.

Then… I found him in an alley- and...and-!”

He starts to hyperventilate and Chase comes over and holds his hand, kneeling down by him.

“Breathe Jackie�� you’re not in danger right now.”

Jackie shuts his eyes and laughs breathily, eyeing the passed out body on the bed behind him.

“I’m...not so sure about that.”

He tries to breathe slower before starting up again.

“When I found him… he had… killed them… He killed the robbers!!” Jackie finds himself shouting. The others all gasp- well Chase and Schneep. Jamie… was sitting on the hospital bed next to Marvin and was strangely quiet. More so than usual. He seemed almost indifferent. Or, not present at all. But, he does flinch at Jackie’s shout.

“What do you mean… killed??” Schneep asked in a panicked voice.

“That...doesn’t sound like Marvin…” Chase whispers, holding a hand to his chest.

Jackie nods solemnly. “I know… I know- but… I know what I saw. The… the criminals… they were drained of all color… yet tinted dark purple. They had purple veins crawling up every inch of skin.. and their eyes were milky white. And… black smoke was coming out of their mouths… but they weren’t breathing.”

“How do you know that was Marvin though- maybe it was someone else and Marvin-!” Chase tries to interrupt but Jackie holds up a hand, looking haunted.

“I saw him do it…” Jackie whispers, shaking. “I saw him drain the life out of the last robber… then drop him to the ground like it was nothing…. it was him.”

There’s a heavy silence in the room. A pressure from the weight of what Marvin did.

Eventually, Chase tries to speak, voice choked and confused as he shakily lowers himself to the floor to sit. “I… don’t understand. Why… why would Marvin do this? He- He just got kidnapped! When… when did he change so suddenly…? Is it Anti?”

Jackie sighs, messing with his hair. He looks a mess still, after fighting Marvin. “That’s what we need to figure out…” He pushes his bangs back out of his face, looking at the ceiling. The poor hero seems so exhausted. He knits his eyebrows together as he tries to think. “He… started to seem strange… right before Jamie told me he was quitting hero work…”

“He what??” Schneep asks, eyes wide. Chase looks shocked as well. Jackie blinks in confusion.

“You didn’t know?”

“No…” Chase mumbles, “I haven’t seen you all since we got Marvin back. I heard you all were heading back to work and… that was it.”

Henrik nods, “And I, of course, am always very busy here…”

Jackie still looks unsettled and he looks back to look at the quiet ego, “J- why didn’t you tell them…?”

Jameson, however, isn’t looking at any of them. As if he hadn’t heard any of their conversation at all. He’s staring at the floor, at nothing.

There seems to be a purple tint in his eyes.

Jackie stiffens then lunges to grab Jamie’s arm. The teal haired ego jerks and looks at Jackie with wide eyes, trying to scramble away.

“Jackie, what are you doing??” Schneep stammers.

Jackie’s face darkens and the gentleman shivers, curling in on himself. “Marvin, did something to you, didn’t he?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Jameson signs shakily.

“You haven’t reacted at all to the news… aren’t you worried at all?” Jackie asks. Jameson looks away, dipping his head. His irises reflect purple again as he signs. “I… figured it was hero stuff. It’s not my business.”

“This is about Marvin, J! Not hero work!”

Jameson signs faster, a desperate look in his eyes. “I can’t be bothered with this- I can’t listen to hero work- I can’t-“

“And why can’t you?!” Jackie shouts, feeling anger burning in his stomach.

“... because I’m weak. I have no real power. I’m nothing.”

The room goes quiet at Jameson’s confession. Jackie can see it though- there’s a blankness in his expression, a reflection of purple light. He doesn’t really believe those things. He was made to believe it.

Jackie’s eyes flare with power as he grabs Jamie’s shoulder and turns him towards him. The gentleman hardly reacts now. Jackie fishes out his phone and flips the camera towards JJ and shoves it in his face.

“Bullshit- you don’t really think that J… Marvin made you believe that- look at your eyes.”

Jameson stares at the mobile device with a dull expression. But- slowly, the light comes back to his eyes and the purple flickers. His eyebrows raise and he shakes slightly. Unable to move his hands, one of his speech slides shakily appears by his face.

“What…? I… don’t understand-“ He grips at his head, wincing slightly. “My.. head hurts-“

Jackie sits down next to Jamie now, even as the other ego flinches and almost scoots away. But, now he hesitates, looking confused.

“J… when you last talked to Marvin.. what do you remember?” Jackie asks softly.

Jameson closes his eyes, trying to recall. Slowly, his hands start to work again so he can sign.

“He… found me with my hero’s uniform… he- helped me realize that.. heroing was too much for me.”

“He didn’t help you do shit!” Jackie snarls, slamming a fist on the bed. Everyone jumps.

“Jackie, dude- maybe you should calm-“ Chase warns.

“No!” Jackie shouts, going to grab Jameson by the shoulders. His expression is caught in between something desperate and scared.

“Jameson remember… remember how happy you were joining me- remember how confident you felt. You have a talent for something more than working at a clothing store- than just doing your puppet shows. You have a compassion for helping people- you wanted to help save the city like me and Marvin did… please- please tell me you remember that…”

Jameson looks confused, lost, terrified. “I… I-I…”

Chase suddenly scrambles to his feet, back knocking against their bed. “Uh- g-guys??”

Behind them- a purple light is filling Marvin’s now opening eyes. The pressure in the room turns suffocating as dangerous dark energy sparks and crackles from the trapped magician’s body. Jackie wastes no time- he grabs Chase, then grabs Schneep’s coat to throw him back before throwing his body over Jameson.

The room explodes with terrifying power.

As the dust clears, the thrown egos are covered in teal light- Jameson’s hand is thrust out and pulsing with power despite his scared expression. They are all surrounded by a shield, embossed with a pocket watch symbol on its surface.

And before them, broke out of his bonds, is Marvin.

He looks odd, and terrifying. Power has his hair and cape whipping around in an invisible wind. His eyes are empty sockets filled with pulsing violet energy. His skin.. it’s littered with purple glowing veins. Black and purple electricity sparks off him as he takes a step forward. His footsteps seem to char the tiles under him black.

“Where is he-“ Marvin starts to snarl, “Where’s Jack?” His eyes snap to the trembling doctor in the shield.

“M-Marvin… b-buddy…” Jackie tries to stammer. Marvin’s head snaps to the hero, and with a thrust of his arm, purple fire rockets towards the hero. It bursts through the shield like it was sugar glass and Jackie is thrown against the wall with terrifying force. He wheezes brokenly before crumbling to the ground in a heap.

“Don’t you dare speak to me, you traitor!!” Marvin growls dangerously.

Chase crawls to the hero’s side and cradles the passed out hero, tears lingering in his eyes. “J-Jackie!”

Marvin again looks towards Schneep, starting to walk towards him. The doctor scrambles back, heart threatening to beat out of his chest.

“I’m not a patient man, Henrik…” The walls of the room are being burned by the dark power whipping against them. “Where. Is. Jack?!” Marvin commands.

Schneep can hardly breathe. How is this his brother? “M-Marvin, please, l-let’s talk…? You do not need to-“

Marvin bursts more with chaotic magic as he bares his teeth ferally. He lifts up a purple coated hand and Henrik is lifted into the air, hands caught around his neck as he chokes. His legs flail wildly as he tries to get away. Marvin’s hand clenches and Schneep sobs, his throat closing up more.

“Why must I repeat myself? Tell me where Jack is Schneep- do not impede my plight for justice.”

Schneep’s face is now red, almost purple as tears run down his cheeks.

“I… d-do not… w-want you… to… h-hurt him-!” Schneep squeaks breathlessly.

Chase shakily gets to his feet, pulling out his green and orange gun and aiming. The bullets… he changes them to lethal ones with a flash of orange. His hands are shaking.

“Marv… l-let him go- you’re hurting him! Let him go, dude!!”

Marvin cocks his head towards Chase, and with another flick of his head, the gun goes flying out of Chase’s hands.

“You don’t scare me, Brody.” Marvin hums, turning back to Schneep. His magic flares stronger and Schneep gasps wetly. His eyes are now filling with the same purple light as Marvin’s. And he starts to scream bloody murder.

Marvin’s lips curl into a terrifying smile. He closes in on Schneep and brings the man close to his face with his magic. “If you won’t say Hen… then I’ll just take the information from your mind-!”

Schneep sobs and screams, his head flickering with images and words too fast for him to comprehend, like flipping through television channels. He can’t fight- He can’t do anything against the magician!

Jameson finally seems to wake up, watching Marvin’s deeds with new eyes. He furrows his brows, courage once lost to him now flooding back through his veins. He tries to think, then pulls out his pocket watch.

With a flash of teal eyes- the air in the room stills. Henrik freezes mid-scream, Chase mid-run. Yet… it doesn’t affect the corrupted magician. He looks confused then looks to Jameson with darkening eyes.

“Jameson Jackson…” He hisses. He lets go of Schneep, who still floats in his power outside the paused time bubble. He strides towards the gentleman, power flickering dangerously at his fingertips. “I thought I took care of you already…”

Jameson stands tall, his own magic flaring back.

“Marvin… you know this is wrong. I know you do. Please… remember yourself and come back to your family. Please, I’m begging you.”

Marvin’s expression seems unreadable but he does pause. His head tips to the side, his eyebrows slowly furrowing in thought. A blue light seems to flicker in his eyes- revealing his normal ones. But, it’s short lived.

“Your bravery is wasted, Jackson.” Marvin whispers, “You can’t stop me, none of you can. And I’m going to burn the glitch out of our useless creator and end our suffering once and for all.”

Jameson flashes out his magic, teal knives now posed around Marvin’s head. Jameson’s hand shakes.

“Marvin, my friend- brother, please! Don’t make me do this- I don’t want to hurt you!”

Marvin pauses then grins wolfishly. “I knew you didn’t have the guts. Just a useless, pathetic mute-!”

Jameson’s eyes flare in anger and with a pulse of teal, all his knives dive to strike Marvin. The bubble keeping time from moving bursts and Marvin goes flying into one of the wall, a knife driven into his shoulder and pinning him there.

Schneep wheezes as the magic breaks and he falls heavily to the floor. Chase blinks in confusion. ‘What the- what just happened?”

Jameson looks scared of what he just did. But, soon his resolve strengthens and he walks towards Marvin, readying more magic weapons to strike him.

“How powerless am I now, Marv?”

There’s silence from the bleeding magician. But then his shoulders shake and quiet giggles escape his lips. He grabs the magic knife and it cracks with purple veins before turning black and crumbling.

“Completely…” He laughs, flashing up normal eyes at Jamie but tinted that terrifying purple. “I got what I needed.”

With a snap, Marvin bursts into pure smoke and disappears.

Jameson’s magic bursts as his stomach drops and his blood runs cold. No- did he actually get Jack’s location from Schneep’s head after all? He quickly runs to wake all his brothers, helping them to their feet with urgency.

“Wake up- hurry! We’d must hurry!! Marvin is gonna try to kill Anti!”

[iwantutobehapppier]

Mine

This is part 3 of on going story you can read the first two Just Ask ,You Belong, follow ups are A Habit and Convalescence 

Pairing: Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader

Summary: Pre-Infinity War you hear about Tony and Pepper’s engagement and want to see them regardless of the risk. When you come back Steve is less than thrilled at your behavior.

Warnings: Language, Dark!Steve, Possessive!Steve, light choking, rough sex, oral, little bit of dubious consent, unprotected sex. 18 and older only, do not read if under the age of 18. This isn’t for everyone, if any of these situations bother you please read no further.

Word Count: 5,060

A/N: This is smutty and with some plot, minimal plot. Smut stuff. I have two more parts of this to go and its done. The next one gets darker than rest just ya know heads up. Without further ado enjoy my mediocre smut offering to my deepest fantasy that is Dark!Steve Rogers.

Steve had one hand pining you wrists against the soft grass below you both while the other hand was around your neck tightly as you arched your chest up towards him as an offering. The dark look in his eyes as he smirked at you sent shivers down your spine.

“Do you want to cum?” You nodded your head with limited movement from his grip.

“Too bad,” He began thrusting into you with the same ferocity you had become accustomed to; you could admit it now that you craved him like this.

He was mad at you, actually livid was better word to describe how he felt. You left him after finishing a mission with him and your fellow outlaws. You were only gone for 3 days but the risk you put yourself at is what had him madder than anything.

-2 Days Before-

“You look worse for wear,” Pepper’s voice full of worry holding your hand in hers.

“I know, we’ve-I’ve been busy,” you tried to cover your tracks, knowing Stark wouldn’t want to hear any word about the others.

“So why are you here? Going to try and undo two years of your complete and utter abandonment,” Stark’s tone was harsh but you knew it was a front to hide how much he missed you.

“I heard the news, I wanted to see you two in person. I saw both of you were going to be away from the usual entourage-”

“How long have you been tracking F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s system? And why didn’t she tell me anything?”

“Tony come on, she’s here. Let’s celebrate together, that’s what you said you wanted. Remember, to celebrate with ALL your friends and family?” He tried to look mad at Pepper but couldn’t; he sighed and went to the wet bar grabbing three glasses and a bottle of Don Perignon.

As he poured you squeezed Pepper’s left hand feeling the big rock on her finger. Smiling brightly at her you couldn’t help yourself at the joy that overcame you. How could you not see them in person after such big news?

“Spared no expense huh Tony?” you commented grabbing the glass he offered you.

He hmed in reply as Pepper took the last glass you all three raised them together.

“To you Pepper and Tony, may it be a marriage full of minimal surprises and many children with more Pepper in them than Tony.” Tony smiled at you for the first time since you showed up at their resort door.

“Here, here!” Pepper cheered as you all clinked glasses and took a drink.

It wasn’t until the bottle was empty that Tony finally asked you what you knew he wanted to all along.

“How are they?” He looked like a scared child, afraid of the answer.

“Good, they’re good Tony.” You could see his shoulders visibly relax, “We have a safe haven and many safe houses as we fight bad guys.” Tony snorted at that last part.

“We were never the bad guys Tony, we just didn’t want to fall to the new world order.” You tried to remind him.

“Tell Nat we loved her present! Pretty easy to tell it was her given the short note” Pepper interjected trying to bring the mood back up. Tony stood up going to the wet bar no doubt to grab Scotch of some kind.

“I had no idea she sent you guys anything,” you were genuinely shocked. No one mentioned the engagement outside of the argument you had with Steve before leaving against his wishes while he slept. You could feel the shadow fall over you as you worried how he would react when you got back.

“Does he know you came here?” He won’t say his name as he sat a glass of Scotch in front of you to match his own.

You quickly picked up the glass and took a big gulp before looking back at him. “Yes, and he was less than thrilled.”

“He’ll get over it; he was always so moody when you weren’t around.” He scrunched his nose up as if recalling a particular memory.

You stayed late into the evening, laughing and enjoying your time with the both. Pretending the truth wasn’t just outside the door with the real world.

You stood up “Well this fugitive better use the guise of night to make it back to my fellow outlaws,” you joked but stumbled in your footing. Perhaps you had too much Scotch.

“You can’t leave like this, why don’t you rest for a bit and then leave in the early morning.” Pepper suggested as she stood up with you to make sure you didn’t fall over. It was Tony who left the room to grab a pillow and blanket.

“Get some shut eye on the couch kid. We won’t let anyone in until you’re gone,” his tone was non-negotiable. You nodded you head numbly; he hadn’t called you kid in a while.

When you awoke a few hours later you peaked outside the window, it was still late enough that the sun wasn’t up but early enough that the sky was getting lighter on the horizon. Now was better a time than any to get back to Steve. Worrying your bottom lip you watched the outside for any activity, this would certainly add a day to your travel if Steve wasn’t already upset with you he’ll certainly be livid when you got back a day later than expected.

You were folding up the blanket and placing it on the pillow provided to you when you heard the bedroom door quietly open and close. Tony walked up to you and pulled you into a hug unexpectedly.

“It’s good to see you,” he muttered in a sleepy voice. You nodded cautiously wrapping your arms around him.

“Tell that rag-tag group…” Tony stopped talking and started to pull away but you put your hand on his shoulder.

“I wish there was another way.” He shrugged your hand off his shoulder.

“We all did what we thought was the right thing to do. Now we all have to live with the consequences.” His words full of regret and anger over everything that transpired between the Avengers.  

-Present-

Steve’s grip on your throat tightened, constricting your air flow your eyes bulging as you looked into his deep blue eyes barely visible by the dark blown pupils.

“Focus on me doll face,” He kissed you lips gently almost reverently as he slowed his pace. He seemed to be savoring the feel of you with each slow thrust back in to your heat.

“You always feel so good, even when you behave badly,” his growled out.

“Do you know how scared I was?” He punctuated each word with an increasing thrust of his hips. You gasped as he slammed against the opening of your cervix at the last push.

He stayed still inside you, letting go of your wrists and neck he gripped the sides of you face tightly. His hands almost bigger than your face. It felt as though he was staring straight into your soul, the fear in his eyes hiding behind the growing darkness.

You pushed your hand against his chest trying to move him off, you wanted to talk about this but Steve had different ways of talking to you nowadays.

“I-” your words cut short into a cry as he started thrusting into you at his grueling pace. Bringing you closer to the edge. Just as he felt you start to contract around his cock he pulled out.

“I said no,” he sat up on his knees, his cock slick he stroked himself a few times looking down at you with a hunger that drew a moan from you.

Suddenly he put both his hands under your arms and as he stood up he brought you to your knees on the plush Wakanda grass. You looked up at him, the dusk light giving his heaving chest an ethereal glow, his hair the longest you’ve ever seen it was half pushed back, half in front of his face.

He held your chin as he caressed your lips with his thumb. Catching his thumb in between your lips you began to suck on hit gently, wrapping your tongue around.

“So lewd,” he muttered under his breath and removed his thumb from your mouth.

Placing one hand on the back of your head and the other around the base of his cock he smiled down at you.

“Say ah,” you kept your mouth closed and glare up at him. As much as you’d love to reunite with this passion you wanted to use your actual words. He scowled back at you and gripped your chin with the hand that was on your head, “Open up or you’ll regret it,” he threatened.

You resisted and not to be denied he began to put pressure on your chin pulling it down, you complied opening your mouth and he pulled your head down his cock until your lips met his fingers still holding himself at the base.

You controlled your breathing as you felt him move down your throat, you made sure to keep swallowing and suck as much as you could. Every time he would use your mouth it made you burn with desire. Knowing you could make him feel this way, loss control completely to you.

He loosened his grip on your head and you took the lead, slowly pulling your head back with only the head of his cock between your lips, you gently sucked while running your tongue along the ridge.  He groaned loudly and placing his hands on each side of your head slightly angling your head up to him.

“You better stop teasing me doll,” he looked down at you with a meaningful stare. You nodded with the tip still in your mouth.

You gripped his ass cheeks and began to work your way down his cock, sucking and moving your tongue along him as more and more went down your throat.

Once your nose touched the light blonde pubic hair you gently shook your head back and forth constricting and releasing your throat muscles around him. As you went to move your head back his hands stilled you in place.

“Only good girls get to breath,” his words made you moan around his cock and you could feel yourself getting wetter. He knew exactly what to say.

He kept you there, looking down at you, small grunts escaping his mouth as he felt your throat muscles start to convulse around him as you struggled at lack of oxygen.

When he released your head you pulled back quickly leaving his cock covered in your saliva and a trial ran from the tip to your open mouth as you panted.

Steve chuckled and then pulled you back towards him as he thrust into your mouth slowly back and forth. He grunted as he held you head still and began thrusting himself in and out of your throat.

You knew it would hurt later but you didn’t care, watching his face for the pure look of pleasure cause a moan to escaper around his cock.

“You sure do love having that pretty mouth fucked,” he got out between grunts before the pace picked up speed and suddenly he was holding you down to the base of his cock. He threw his head back moaning loudly as you felt his cum rush down your throat and his hips bucking erratically. You loved seeing his muscles stretch along his chest and up his neck, that one vein pulsing.

“Oh for fuck’s sake man, right behind my shack?!” you heard Bucky from behind you and screeched as Steve pulled himself from your mouth and you curled into yourself trying to cover up.

“Turn around!” Steve yelled at Bucky who quickly did so with his one hand up in the air.

“Alright alright, if you didn’t want her to be seen maybe not do it out in the open,” Bucky did make a point but you were too busy looking for your clothes.

You punched Steve in the shoulder when you held up your torn shirt in front of him. Using the once nice shirt to wipe your mouth clean then handing it to Steve to use for clean up as well.

“Now what am I supposed to wear? I’m not walking back to the city in just a bra,” Steve chuckled and handed you his shirt. He declined cleaning up and gave you a wicked smirk as he placed his rather messy cock back in his boxer briefs.

“Casualty of pure desire and your piss poor behavior I’m afraid,” you glared at him as you both continued to dress in a hurry.

“I’m still here and I am thoroughly upset by this conversation,” Bucky interjected.

“Oh fuck off” you grumbled as you pulled the giant shirt over your head. It would be pretty clear to everyone what you two were up to especially the grass stains on the shirt. You know Steve didn’t care about what random people inferred; after all he loved leaving his mark all over your neck and chest.

“You’re just mad you didn’t get yours,” Bucky bit back and you gasped. He wasn’t wrong but still!

“Bucky,” Steve warned, and then looked at you apologetically. You knew he’d take care of you but it did little to help the current ache between your legs.

Once your last shoe was tied up you walked past Steve and Bucky wanting to get to the city as quick as possible.

“Glad to see you’re back safe!” Bucky called out knowing he was purposely touching a soft spot. Bucky let out an ‘oof’ as Steve elbowed him in the rib.

“Stop antagonizing her Buck,” Steve frowned at him as he took the same arm and hugged him.

“I’m not apologizing, you were worried about her. It’s only fair to give her shit.” he retorted. Steve sighed and went to chase after you.

Bucky hollered for Steve to wait for him and the two of them walked closely behind you chatting away.

You huffed as you stepped into the bustling city. Quickly you caught a ride to the house were rest of your group were. Steve and Bucky joined you; making an already tight ride even tighter squished in between two super soldiers going on about something you had no desire to pay attention to.

You drifted off thinking about Tony and the past two years. It hurt not being with your dear friend constantly, but knowing he was non-combatant gave you a little peace of mind.

You looked up at Steve seeing his animated face as he chatted away with Bucky. Once Shuri was able to reverse Hydra’s brainwashing Bucky began living in the outskirts of the city enjoying the peace and quiet over the constant stimulation the city gave. However when you all found your way back to Wakanda after a mission when possible and the two old super soldiers were inspirable.

Honestly it made you happy to see Steve feel so at peace and connected to his old life. It was important to you that he remembers who he was before he became Captain America. You slid your hand into his and squeezed his hand; he looked down at you and smiled placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

Even with all that there was still a roughness growing around Steve. You weren’t sure if it was the struggle of living this outlaw life wearing down him more than you.

If you were honest it was even getting to Sam. You, Nat and Wanda had the easier time of adjusting. This was not a new concept for you three but Sam and Steve were soldiers. Not that they didn’t know their own struggles with a soldiers life, this was just a new one to add on to the ever growing list.

Sam missed group therapy and Steve missed it too, but he wouldn’t admit it as freely. Sam and you the only ones who knew he was going to group meetings before the Accords happened.

Maybe that was also contributing to this change in him. Your thoughts were broken as Steve called your name.

“You in there?” Steve brought the back of your hand to his lips trying to get your attention.

“Oh sorry, what was that?” You looked up at him trying to clear the haze.

“Buck and I were going to watch an old movie. Did you want to join us?” You shook your head.

“No, I think I’m going to lie down. Last 3 days have been kind of rough.” He gave you a hard look as if trying to will you to tell him why.

“We’ll talk later,” you reassured him as the vehicle came to a stop. Steve got out first, holding his hand out for you to take. After he helped you out you went to pull you hand back but he held it tight. You looked up at him.

His face was constricted as if he wanted to kiss you but both of you weren’t big into PDA and it was rather public in the center of the city. Instead you led him by the hand into the large multi-family building and headed to the floor you all remained on together. Bucky following behind staying silent, keeping his head down trying to mute out the noise of the city.

Once in the elevator Steve held you close to him, you wrapped your arms around him holding tight, resting your ear against his chest listening to his heart.

Bucky hit the floor number and looked at Steve giving him a knowing smile. You rolled your eyes and turned your head the other way.

Steve gripped your chin pulling you to look at him. His smile was soft and loving down at you; it caused you to swallow hard. When he looked at you like this you could feel yourself turning into mush. He caressed you check with the back of his fingers, his touch seemed awed as if worshiping of you.

The elevator dinged and all 3 of you entered the floor suit. You like that everyone stayed together, reminding you of the Stark Tower and compound days, but also to be able to watch each other’s back. “Protection in numbers” you could hear Steve say. The exact reason you leaving on your own upset him so much.

“I’ll meet you in the media room Bucky,” Steve called out as he followed behind you to your shared room.

The moment the door to your room shut Steve had you back in his arms. Nipping at each side of your chin, kissing the corners of your mouth before he finally captured your lips. Soft kisses turned passionate fast, his tongue running along your lips. You opened your mouth, your tongues meeting together causing him to sigh and his body relax. You ran your fingers through his long hair as you felt the desire from earlier begin to build back up.

Reluctantly you pulled your lips from his. “You better scurry or Bucky is going to come looking for you,” he pressed his lips against yours again as if ignoring what you said.

He pulled away standing up straight and slowly slid his arms from around you, feeling ever part of you he could, finally resting his hands on your ass with a gentle squeeze.

“Rogers,” you giggled out. He smiled down at you and kissed your nose.

“Get some rest doll face; I’ll try not to wake you when I come back.” You knew there was a good chance he’d purposely wake you up to hear you call out his name in ecstasy and you couldn’t wait.

-

You woke up, feeling for Steve beside you but he wasn’t there. A little upset by this you looked at the clock. It had been 5 hours? What movie were they watching?!

You huffed but tried to calm yourself down. It wasn’t that big of a deal, but you were getting a little desperate for release as you started to wake up more.

Grumbling you got up to run a warm bath. Once fully submerged in the huge garden tub you let out a pleased sigh.

You tapped the wall next to the tub and a control screen came up through it you dimmed the lights and selected some soft R&B to play. You relaxed as you lay back in the tub.

This certainly beat running city to city on your own. Remembering the night in Morocco, it was you first introduction to this raw, passion ridden Steve. Since then it only escalated, he was demanding but generous, possessive and unyielding.

You moaned softly, the humid warm air the bath leaving a thin layer of perspiration on your face. He possessed your body, mind and heart. He scared you often with his desire but found that with your fear came a line of desire and while you may protest you didn’t really want him to stop. Even if you tried you knew it was useless he took what he wanted. The thought sent shivers own your spine as though you weren’t in warm water.

Your hand trailed around your neck as you imagined the time he chocked you so hard you passed out waking up moments later to him still pounding away; only difference his hands on your breast instead of around your neck. He was in tuned with your body, knowing what you could and couldn’t take, but you tried to take all he offered.

You close your eyes rolling your nipple between your fingers as your other hand moved to cup your sex, or pussy as he loved to call it. You moaned softly as if you could hear him say it. Rubbing your clit slowly you rolled your head back. The sound of the water sloshing against the side of the tub as your movements increased.  Small whimpers escaped your lips, it felt good but it didn’t feel like him. Nothing compared to the way he played your body, with the same finesse he had with a shield. Lost in your thoughts of him your whimpers raised in volume.

“What do you think you’re doing?” His voice was stern and right by your ear. Your eyes snap open looking directly at him, too frightened to make a noise.

“That’s mine,” he growled. His pupils were blown and brow scrunched up. Your tongue suddenly felt thick in your mouth you swallowed to try and clear the feeling.

“I’m sorry, I-” before you could finish he was in the bathtub with you, still clothed. You could hear the water spilling over the lip of the tub, coating the bathroom floor if you weren’t so concerned about the look in his eyes you’d complain about the mess.

He ripped your hand from between your legs replacing it with his palm pressing against your clit and diving three of his fingers deep into you. His other hand slammed against the tile next your head you could feel the air push at the force of his movement, a distinct crack echoed in the bathroom.

His pressure was punishing. You arched your back out, head rolling against the wall as you cried from the sensation. The only response was an increase in his pace. He made move as if he would kiss you but instead began biting and sucking along your neck and down your chest until he captured a nipple between his teeth, rolling and sucking.

His pace not wavering as he pushed you to the point of breaking, your volume rising as you felt yourself tipping he completely still his hand. You whimpered out at the third time he’d stopped your pleasure today. He kissed his way back up your neck. Rubbing his beard against the agitated skin.

“Say it,” the heat of his breath burned against your neck at the demand.

“I’m sorry,” his bite was harsh on your neck, making you gasp out in pain. What did he want to hear?! You tried to search through the pleasure haze.

“Come on doll face, you know what you need to say,” his tone was softer this time, as he kissed up your neck pausing at your ear.

“Say it,” he pressed down on your pussy, causing you to push your body flush against his chest.

“I’m yours,” It came out of your mouth before you even thought of it, it was the truest thing.

He chuckled at the desperation in your voice and showed you mercy, shoving his fingers back in you and continuing the pace he had set before stopping so abruptly.

You could feel the pressure move through your core and up your spine. He knew your body better than you did.

“That’s it doll face, let go.” his voice strained against your neck.

Your hands gripped his head tightly, weaving fingers through his hair you began to pull on it as the pleasure became too much. The pressure of his palm against your clit and the frantic thrusting of his fingers.

The coil you felt so tightly busted and a uncontrollable cry came out. Your legs quaking with the intensity of your orgasm.

A soft chuckle was the first thing you heard as you came back down.

“Quiet the mess we made,” he chuckled again as he stood up in the bathtub.

You wanted to retort that it was his mess but thought better of it. He set the tub to drain and stepped out, pulling his soaked clothes off.

Once he was undressed he turned to you offering his hand. You admired his naked body before reaching for his hand.

He smirked at you, purposely flexing. Grabbing your hand he pulled you from the tub to right up against his body and in his embrace. His strong arms wrapping completely around you as you placed both your hands against his chest and resting your face against him. A content sigh fell from your lips as you listened to his heart beat. You swayed together to the melody still playing from your selected music earlier.

These little moments between the missions, the others demands of you, the fighting, fear of being spotted and taken in, these were the moments you found yourself grounded. You looked up and saw him staring down at you already. A shy smile spread across your lips.

“I love you,” his eyes softened at you words. It was rarely said but neither of you doubted it was there.

“I love you too,” his head dipped down, you rising to your tip toes to meet up for a soft kiss. Almost feather like touches. He pulled a towel from its rack and began to dry you, his movements soft and slow. It felt like he was trying to lull you with his gentle touches. Once you were dry you grabbed the other towel and paid him similar attention.

You set both towels next to the pile of his wet clothes. You decide it would be tomorrow’s problem as Steve pulled you to the bedroom and onto the bed, pulling you back into his chest. Expecting him to begin your nightly routine of mind blowing sex you were caught off guard when he spoke instead.

“I was scared you wouldn’t make it back,” you frowned at him.

“Do you think I’m that bad at staying under the radar,” he wouldn’t look down at you as he spoke again but his arms tightened around you almost uncomfortably so.

“You were gone a day longer than your note said. A note I did not appreciate finding in our bed where you should have been.” you felt a constriction in your chest. You knew it was wrong what you did, you should have found a way to see Tony and Pepper with Steve’s help but you made it back fine on your own.

“It was just Tony and Pepper, I made sure I looked in F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s back door to see his schedule and the planned entourage for the trip. I wasn’t going to make contact unless I knew it would be safe,”

“What if Tony had turned you in?” your look turned to incredulous as you pulled away from his embrace.

“Do you honestly think he would have done that?” Steve sighed and shook his head.

“I know he wouldn’t but you can’t leave me like that, leave us like that. It’s not how it used to be,” a bitter laugh bubbled from your throat.

“Oh believe me no one knows better than I that it’s not like it used to be,” he looked at you in pain, not liking what you were implying and you instantly regretted saying it.

“Steve I didn’t mean to say-”

“I think you meant exactly what you said,” he placed a hand on your face, fingers splayed across your cheek. “I know you’ve been patience with me while I process through this new life style, this new me.”

You turned your head slightly to kiss his palm. His eyes softened once more, the deep blue showing that vulnerability, like he’d just break with a few ill placed words.

“I’m yours, you know that right? I’ve invested myself in us, committed until the end. I just want to love you.” You tried to use the right words to express yourself.

He smiled down at you, knowing you were trying so hard.

“Just as you are mine, I’m yours. I want to know you’re safe, secure and protected. It’s important to me,” He stressed the last part.

“I can’t be safe all the time, not in our line of work,” he sighed knowing the truth in your words, sometimes he long for a normal life one where he could rest easy knowing you were safe each day.

“Just try to wait for me next time you want to meet with someone who could turn you in.” He conceded, pulling you back against him, tucking your head under his.

“I suppose that’s reasonable,” you muttered into his chest and he chuckled softly.

“That’s my girl.”

You nuzzled into him, taking this moment and committing it to memory; neither of you aware of how much more your lives were going to change in the coming weeks.