#I don’t think I actually have herpes??

[fatass-adam]

I got a fucking sore on my lip and @dreamerlucifer has been messing with me (playfully) about it. We made a conversation like-

Lucifer: No Adam! I’m not sleeping with you! You have crabs!

Adam: I SAID I HAD HERPES!! IT’S DIFFERENT!!!

[wonderjanga]

Billy Pranks Hal

Billy doesn’t know the difference between pranks and straight up crime. He doesn’t know this because Freddy’s ideas of pranks are crimes. The reason this is, is because he didn’t really grown up around any other kids his age. So, Freddy’s the best example he’s got. So, when Hal pranks him, he decides to “prank” him back. By the way, during all of this, he thinks this is just lighthearted fun.

Billy (in Marvel from) gets the most brilliant idea. Though, technically it isn’t his idea, but rather Freddy’s. He’s going to hire a hooker to give Hal herpes. Pause, and run it back. He’s going to hire a hooker, bring her to the Watchtower, have her brush her teeth with Hal’s toothbrush, and then that will him herpes. Freddy said he saw it on a Southpark episode and wanted to see if it would actually work in real life. So the two talked to Ms.Bambi to see if any of her friends had the disease and sure enough she knew someone. She was a little skeptical, but when they told her the reason, she gave in. But she did end up supervising them the whole way, including going with them to the guy they were “pranking’s” house. It’s one of Billy’s favorite memories.

So, Billy approaches her as Marvel and asks her her to do it. She briefly remarks about how this is the second time she’s had to do this, but agrees as long as he pays her fare. He scrounges up the few dollars he has, pays her, and he takes her to the Watchtower. He obviously gets weird looks because why did Captain Marvel of all people come to the Watchtower with someone who looks(they didn’t want to assume) like a hooker? Meanwhile, Marvel and Ms.Hooker are chatting about being broke, ignoring the looks. Eventually they get to Hal’s room and just as they’re about to find a way in, John leaves the room next to them.

John: “Hey, Cap.” *waves, then does a double take at Ms.Hooker* “Who’s this?”

Marvel: “Hmm? Oh, this is Ms.Foxy.”

Ms.Foxy: “Hey.” *waves*

John: “Okay… Cool. Cool… Why’re you trying to get into Green Lantern’s room?”

Ms.Foxy: “Aren’t you Green Lantern?”

Marvel: “There’s like four of them actually.” *looks over to Ms.Foxy while holding up 4 fingers*

John: “There’s actually more- Never mind, you didn’t answer my question, Cap.”

Marvel: “Oh right! I’m pranking him. Ms.Foxy is going to help me.” *gestures to Ms.Foxy*

John: “Huh. Really? What’re you going to do?”

Marvel: “She’s gonna give him herpes.”

*loud silence*

John: “…What?”

Marvel: “She’s gonna give him herpes.”

John: “…okay. I thought I heard you correctly. YOU’RE GOING TO DO WHAT?!”

Marvel: *surprised by the sudden yelling* “She’s going to give him herpes- why is that so surprising?”

Ms.Foxy: “No offense, big man, but that’s not necessarily something you do just as a prank.” *Pats Marvel’s arm* “This is more getting revenge for someone hitting your dog with a car type of shit.”

John: “YES! She’s right! What did he do to you? How bad was the prank??”

Marvel: “Nothing that bad? All he did was leave a tack on my chair when we switched for monitor duty. It didn’t really do anything though except bend since it couldn’t prick me.”

John: “Okay???? Then what did he do to warrant this??” *sounds extremely distressed and confused*

Marvel: “Well, he pranked me. I’m just pranking him back.”

Ms.Foxy: “I don’t think you get what he’s trying to tell you. This isn’t really a prank, bud. It’s more like chemical warfare.”

Marvel: “Really…? I had no idea. I thought this was normal.” *sighs*

John: “Why would this be normal?”

Ms.Foxy: *ignores him* “Do you want your money back since we aren’t going to do it?”

John: “Money?”

Marvel: *also ignores him* “No, it’s fine, Ms.Foxy. Keep it.” *gives her sunny smile*

John: *takes deep breath* “Captain. Is this woman a hooker?”

Ms.Foxy: *looks over to start acknowledging him again* “I prefer the term prostitute.”

Marvel: *also starts acknowledging him again* “Yeah GL, she prefers the term prostitute. But yes, she’s a hooker.”

John: *takes a few minutes to process his words* “Captain… why is a hooker in the Watchtower?”

Marvel: “Again, prostitute. Also, she’s the one who has herpes. She was kind of needed for this entire prank to happen.”

John: “Prostitute, hooker, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that she’s a civilian. Also stop calling it a prank.”

Ms.Foxy: “He is right, you really should stop calling it that.” *nods head*

John: “Look, just get her outta here. Civilians aren’t allowed up here. Bats is gonna glare at you the same way he did to Flash when he brought someone up here.”

Marvel: “Alright alright. Noted. I won’t bring anyone else up here.” *looks over to Ms.Foxy* “Let’s head back then.”

*They leave while John is still processing everything that just went down*

[maxdibert]

Weasleys never made sense to me - they are too stupid to be alive.

Molly and Arthur decide to pop kids out like they are a pair of rats during the f*cking war. And while they seem to have the money, they are sh*t are making smart decisions with said money: yes, lets give Ron a second hand wand that is so broken it could have killed him - but Percy gets new school robes and an owl (not that he didn’t deserve it, but come on - they could have given him either the robes or the owl, and saved some money to get the kid a wand that didn’t have the potential to land him in St. Mungus for the rest of his life, and the only reason Ron got a new one was because the he broke it stealing his father’s illegal car, otherwise it would have stayed with Ron until it did the same thing to him that it did with Lockhart).

Does Arthur ever acts like a father? I can’t remember, Molly seems to be the only caretaker while he lurks on the background mumbling about muggle things like he actually knows anything about them.

They win a big money prize? Lets waste it on a stupid trip to look at some pretty tombs where F&G tried to lock Percy in a pyramid - showing no regard for their own brother's safety, what a nice family! - instead of saving it for when they actually need it or buying new clothes/books for their children, for example.

Narcissa & Lucius are not the greatest parents either, but even if they had the same amount of kids as the Weasley's - I doubt that they would do as bad of a job as Molly & Arthur did. What do you think?

I mean, if I say what I really think about people who have kids like rabbits, the entire internet would cancel me — but whatever, I don’t care.

What I’m trying to say is that I was raised by very progressive parents, especially my mother. My mom was born in the late ’50s and grew up during the final years of a fascist, ultra-Catholic dictatorship that was extremely repressive toward women, and still she went to university. When she graduated — just as the regime was ending — she and her classmates managed to create a cooperative (which is not the same as a business, but a collectivist association). She had several partners, got a second degree while working, and then decided to take the civil service exams. And only after doing all of that, she chose to become a mother — and she did. She became a mother after studying, creating a job for herself, saving up money, buying a house on her own as a single woman IN THE 80s, passing a civil service exam, and then selling that house to buy a better one. My mother didn’t become a mother until she knew she could give me pretty much everything she herself never had, and made sure to find a father who could help give her daughter a good life.

I was raised with that mentality. I’m saying this because it’s important to understand where I’m coming from, so people don’t assume I’m just cold or whatever. My mother raised me this way. I was taught that one of the worst things you can do in life is to have kids before you’re financially stable — because your responsibility as a parent is to be able to take proper care of your children and give them a good life. And if you can’t, then don’t have it.

It was my mom who gave me the sex ed talks and told me that protection wasn’t just to avoid pregnancy — the important thing was to avoid STDs. For her, getting pregnant wasn’t a big deal because — and I quote: “we can fix that for free through public healthcare, but a herpes outbreak is not so easy to get rid of.” So, in my mind, the idea of abortion is totally normalized. And even today, with a stable job and a home of my own, if I got pregnant — even with a partner — I’d have an abortion, because I don’t think I earn enough to bring a child into this world and give them a comfortable life.

That said — having seven kids without the financial means to treat them all equally? I think that’s bullshit. I think it’s irresponsible. I think it shows a complete lack of foresight. I get that this happens in certain communities, but the Weasleys were an educated family — both parents had studied, and I assume they were aware of the same birth control methods as the rest of magical society. So I don’t understand what moment they thought it was a great idea to just start popping out babies like Molly Weasley was some kind of incubator.

And on top of that, she’s a woman with no life beyond her husband and kids. Like, sure, you can be a housewife and still have hobbies, go out with your friends, join a book club, something — but she doesn’t. All she does is give birth, cook meals, and knit sweaters. I mean, is there a more tradwife-coded character than that? And of course, she carries the full burden of parenting and worrying about the kids, because her mediocre husband with his mediocre job — who’s actually proud of not striving for a better salary to support his seven children — does absolutely nothing. And then Molly complains about not having enough money? Girl, if you made that useless man help around the house and got yourself a job, maybe things wouldn’t be so hard. Or, you know — if you had two or three kids instead of seven.

And the worst part is, their whole dynamic is so cultish. Like, “you either accept our lifestyle, our values, and our morals — or you’re garbage.” I honestly can’t stand them. They’re literally the opposite of my family in every possible way. Molly is the opposite of my mom, and Arthur is the opposite of my dad. And honestly, just thinking about what I’d do if I met people like that in real life gives me anxiety.

Don’t have kids if you can’t afford to raise them. Please don’t bring unhappy children into the world. I just really, truly don’t see the point. What’s the need?

That’s my opinion. I don’t care if I get canceled. I’m sorry, but in my family, this kind of thing is seriously frowned upon. I was raised to believe that ending up like Molly Weasley is one of the worst things that can happen to you as a woman and men like Arthur are useless as partners beca use thet’re not companions but one children more so I’m sorry but those are things I just can’t shake off.

[psychiatry-and-poetry]

Out-of-Pocket Quotes

A/N: These are random quotes I have overheard, seen, or said irl and I thought it would be funny to make a little compilation of them here! Lmk what you think of these (bonus points if you try to guess where these come from/the context!) Also, note that these might be offensive jokes in some cases but I don't actually mean anything with these

What if the king was on drugs?

You’re the reason people yell fire instead of help

Hashtag yakuza fan page

I want a lobotomy

Hey guys, it’s me, your neighbourhood Caucasian

How much pussy do you think I’d need to eat before I die?

Your spiritual level dick

If you were Pinocchio, you’d have a nose long enough to ride

I did not need to be flashed by Italy’s fascist dictator

We turn on the stove but lay in the pan

Mr. Incognito over here

I’m very economic friendly

Ugh, heterosexuals

I’m gonna put you in a chamber

“I love sluts, I want an orgasm” in a dream

No, homosexuality is big enough of a contraceptive

Last time, you dislocated his cotton

That seems like Lord Farquaad from Shrek put into Benito Mussolini

Did you see his speeches? It looked like a Taylor Swift concert

I'm not a software. I’m hardware, cause I’m always hard

I don’t know, I think it would be unethical to give out small children

I only showed my boobs to (name)! It’s the same thing!

World peace is lame, I like employment

Lord, I am not your strongest soldier. Give my battles to someone else.

No, actually, I'm going to seduce German brainrot

Jalapeños in your ass water

You know the saying “the more, the merrier”? I think they were referring to polyamory

It means you’re a gay whore

I’m doing gay shit and I keep touching his ass. I need to calm down.

Homiesexual

A fetish for fibre? Yeah, that’s a fibre addiction

It’s not cheating if it’s a threesome

She should be illegal! No, she’s an aryan

So apparently WikiHow supports mpreg?

It’s like 37 degrees here. Wait, let me get that for you in communism units

So Dorothy is basically a terrorist

Do you know what it feels like when I point at your eyeball?

Why are you leaking rulers?

The lottery is more complex than childbirth

Why are white people…scientifically? Do they have hidden whiteness?

Why are we so weird? No, we’re just queer

The human body has 206 bones. When I’m with children, I have 207

Be molested or something

I want to permanently mutate my body

Imaginary logs sound schizophrenic

You felt her gaze? More like you felt her gays

Do it before it does you

Why are these incest tomatoes?

They could have been sexting through carrier pigeons

It’s like the Pokémon fish version of Chappell Roan

Hamstring? Yeah I’m about to string your ham

I’m pretty sure I have to be made by two straight people

Mildred from Fahrenheit 451 is basically their version of an iPad kid

Does herpes make me cry?

Apparently seagulls are gay

Dora is so terrorist-coded

How hot does the Earth have to be for our farts to spontaneously combust?

Fuck off, hydrogen!

You know what’s really bad? Sexual torture

You’re not white. Yay!

Let’s peel back hairlines like we peel back layers of onions

This is definitely dinosaur porn

Your bloodline probably has 25 STDs but you do you

I didn’t sign up for having weird, disfigured incest babies

See, this is why guillotines are the best!

It tasted like perverted sushi

I love bombing brown children, someone’s gotta do it

Mmm, plant sperm, smells delicious

Burning is not a personality trait

He drew a really shitty tree that looked like a uterus

Maybe buildings can have sex, maybe we just don’t know it yet

Reptiles would be such good capitalists

Euler was the first gigachad

Phonic apparatus

International transcendence

Hitler, you can’t take the Jews. Give them back!

World War 2 was just a failed version of gentle parenting

It’s dick macaroni

Stop bringing the incestual vibe to the function

Hitler was like the suicidal son they never wanted

My friend is investing in the stock market, which is basically glorified gambling

Why are you molesting my spoon?

Do your child victims relate?

I abuse all my friends equally

How is cannibalism not PG-13?

Everyone walking around is superhuman. Except poor people

It’s not considered kidnapping a kid if it’s an orphan. Then it’s free housing

How many grandmas could you drop kick before you die?

Dear King Philip came over for gay sex

Why are whales better at sex than humans are?

My trans parent bed is part of the LGBTQ furniture

Why would I jerk off to Hitler’s ghost?

Homophobia is cool if I hate straight people more

I really didn’t think (name) would be into a dead fascist, but here we are

Bisexual until proven straight

We don’t discriminate when it comes to molesting

This is corruption therapy

They don’t need Jesus guys, they just need the IB

Don’t worry guys, it’s not infidelity, it’s pedophilia, which is better

When in doubt, Pavlov yourself

I'm not gonna teach you sex ed for lesbians!

How long do you think you'd be able to use a corpse as a boxing bag?

Maybe if you make your cow run enough, it'll start producing lactic acid

I'm gonna lie on my deathbed jacking off to AO3

masterpost

Line dividers credit goes to @enchanthings

[aizenat]

Also queerios and libs need to have a real and honest talk about how trans ideology being attached to liberals and the Democratic Party was a huge reason for people to vote for Trump. No one wants to say it (I’m surprised the radfems haven’t made that point yet, but wait, they’re too busy trying to come up with excuses for why they—white women—voted for Trump in the majority), but exit polls had ppl saying they thought Kamala was “too leftist/progressive.” DESPITE her running a very conservative campaign that was just two talking points away from being a straight up republican campaign.

The trans ad (Kamala cares about they/them, not you) was running almost nonstop in PA—as someone who lives in south Jersey, meaning our local tv programming is based out of Philly, every time I turned my tv on this ad was running. And it’s a good and effective ad. SO MUCH SO THAT I HAD A COWORKER BRING IT UP AS A “MAJOR” THING SHE DISAGREED WITH KAMALA ON THE MORNING OF THE ELECTION.

Libs and tras can pretend the trans stuff wasn’t on ppls minds but it was. Literally up until they stepped into the voting booth. When ppl voted for trump saying he was better for the economy, that’s not based on actual policy. You can tell that because AFTER he was announced the winner, google searches for tarrifs went up. If ppl cared about the economy and how tarrifs would work (Kamala literally referred to them as essentially a tax on all goods to simplify them and yall just said herp durp this won’t hurt me financially at all), they would have been goggling that BEFORE the election.

So why did they think Trump was better for the economy? Because he doesn’t want to send aid to Ukraine, and he doesn’t want to use taxes to fund for trans inmates gender reassignment surgeries. That means fiscal responsibility to them.

When chappel roan got on an interview and said that the biggest “concern” she had was trans rights, people heard that and associated that with the party (democrats) who protect laws allowing for children to medically transition. In my state, hormones and gender reassignment surgeries are covered by most employers’ insurance, but cancer treatments and medically necessary surgeries are not (at least not automatically). THAT signals to the average person that politicians are not prioritizing the right things. Because trans ppl are (per their own words) less than 1% of the population, but they get so much more consideration than the average person. Companies care more about pronouns in their employees’ email signatures than they do about employees feeling like the work environment is racially insensitive or hostile towards women (etc).

And I’m sorry, but you can affirm a child’s gender reasonably without medically transitioning them. And most people, most PARENTS, are not going to be okay with the idea of fearing their child being taking away because they don’t want to pay for or facilitate medical transition until they’re at least 18 and had time to really reflect on if that’s what they want. And they don’t want to be labeled abusive for that.

THAT’S what a lot of people going into the booth were thinking about. That Kamala and democrats would prioritize THAT over raising wages and bringing down inflation and costs. Most working class ppl don’t care about gender identity and stuff: so anyone prioritizing that in a time of financial (and political) strife doesn’t look like someone who is going to prioritize what they need to survive and get by.

Tras need to really sit down and think about 1) how they go about lobbying for their rights (calling people genocidal for messing up a pronoun ain’t it cuz) and 2) what rights are worth lobbying for. For example, it’d be hard to argue against third spaces for gnc ppl in public spaces (bathrooms, changing rooms, etc). Same with third/coed sports leagues IN ADDITION TO mens and women’s leagues. Maybe lobby for your own safe spaces instead of demanding to be on spaces not in alignment with your born sex. Because that push back is only going to get worst and it’s not a battle even most liberals agree with. Especially when you also lobby for self identification over any proof of socially and medically transitions. What’s to stop a man who has no intentions of transitioning to go into a woman’s bathroom or changing room or enter a women’s sport league and claim he has a right to be there because he’s trans and we can’t question it?

And yall REFUSE to answer that honestly and then wonder why people don’t fuck with it. It’d be one thing if there was a barrier of entry, but y’all did away with that. So what are people going to do? At least when black ppl were lobbying for desegregation, it was in coed spaces. And if it was gendered, only the black ppl of said gender would participate (ie, only Black women would be on bathrooms with White women; not Black men as well). But you guys are trying to do away with that. And do away with any determinative way to know who the “real” trans people are vs someone just saying so to get access to a spot. And then if someone pushes back, you call THEM a bigot?

Like, women in Korea just about can’t piss in public because of how widespread hidden cameras are in bathrooms. And all I can think is what will stop an epidemic like that happening here if males can walk in easily and women aren’t even ALLOWED to question him because he MAY be trans?

If yall actually knew anything about Black literature (lol as if yall would read black authors and writers and poets lol), you’d see how all throughout our existence in our country, we have had to defend ourselves from the common perception of us. This is why Black people (well, the educated amongst us lol) are so GOOD at arguing against racist ideas. This is why every time I call a white radfem (or really any white feminist) out in their racism, they go for ad hominem attacks and straw men to try to discredit what I’m saying. And they fail because I straight know what I’m talking about lol.

Y’all’s language and concepts change each year. An argument or talking point is literally thrown away and seen as problematic within 5 years. We used to say that trans ppl are treated how they’re “read,” which helps to explain how their perception of how well or poorly they are able to conform to that read gender affects how others treat them, but now that’s transphobic to say. I literally have no idea what ppl mean when they say transmisogyny these days because it’s SO different from how it was used in 2010-2013. I have no idea what yall are talking about anymore!

Yall have to sit down, LISTEN TO PEOPLE’S CONCERNS instead of writing any pushback as transphobic, and really solidify what trans identity is, the actual signs and symptoms, how to treat it without medical intervention, and be honest on the lack of information and studies on medical intervention. Especially long term; a study following up with ppl who transitioned 50 years ago means nothing because the very concept of what a trans identity is has changed dramatically since then. Especially in the last decade alone!

Yall can’t be super counterculture and then expect the mainstream to rock with you. That’s not how that works. You need to pick a lane and at least come up with a better strategy on how to present the less counterculture aspects to the mainstream so they can understand what trans identities are outside of the radical. Outside of the clickbait titles. But honestly that means YALL coming to at least SOME consensus on what it even means to be trans because all the vague language around it isn’t helping. And when yall refuse to define yourselves, it means anyone else can go out there and define you for the world. This is why yall are losing the war on this. Yall have work to do to fix this shit.

[totalfknloser]

can you do zakk romantic and smut headcanons where he sees a girl at a local gig and decides she's his next hookup but accidentally catches feelings upon getting to know her and finding out she's actually pretty cool and insanely into metal and all the things he is ?? thank you i love your headcanons for him so much

YES THIS IS SO CUTE (praying my headcanons don’t start to sound repetitive also it’s almost 5 am LMAO so if this sounds more like a fanfic i’m so sorry) (okay this does in fact sound more like a fanfic because i genuinely can’t at all figure out another way to write this. yep this is def more of a fanfic with hints of headcanons)

.⛧°+.+°⛧.

⛧ Zakk totally was checking you out and he did not try to hide it. it’s depending on the girl but i don’t think he would usually avoid being stealthy with checking a girl out. you were fixated on him from the start of the gig so when you saw him being possibly interested, you almost squealed with joy.

⛧ tbh idk if zakk would straight up “hey, wanna fuck?” or get to know you just to get you to fuck you but then accidentally really like your traits and personality, but for the sake of keeping these not too sexual, we will do for the second.

⛧ Zakk would talk to you a lot, and you’d do the same. you both would ask questions about each other and unlike you, Zakk started showing romantic interest a lot slower than you did, but it was still there and still growing. Zakk would ask you all kinds of music related questions and about your interests and he really started to take a liking to them.

⛧ Zakk’s questions would slowly get more personal as you’d be walking cause he doesn’t wanna end up fucking some freak or get an std or whatever. “you don’t have herpes or some shit, right?” he asked in a bold tone. “nah, what about you?” you didn’t show that much discomfort, you could tell what you were getting into just by the look of the boy. he responded with “No.”

⛧ you both got to his place and he started off pretty quick. Zakk would definitely not be one for much sweet stuff before sex. sure, Zakk would definitely give you occasional kisses and give you all kinds of passionate touches along your body. Zakk would totally touch your tits if you got any and give you a couple hickies and love bites just to show everyone who meets you for the next week that you’re gonna be his.

⛧ Zakk would really try to push his growing romantic feelings back down as you both get more and more intimate with each other and eventually you both fuck each other like bunnies on the last day of earth. Zakk would only whisper small amounts of mixed degradation and praises cause he isn’t really sure if you’d like to be called a slut or whore too much. he very obviously doesn’t want you to leave, at least not yet.

⛧ even for just a one night type of thing, he was good and you were in heaven. after you two were done, he almost contemplated asking you to leave so he can get his romantic feelings to fuck off, even if he’d miss you for a few days. but Zakk was too tired to care and he just fell asleep with you while you were in his arms.

⛧ Zakk has never done much aftercare in his entire life whenever he’s with a chick or two. you weren’t really knowing what you’d expect, either aftercare or not wasnt a problem really.

⛧ when you guys would wake up, you’d sit in awkward silence for a few minutes till you picked things up and ask if he wants to go out sometime.

⛧ the boy is absolutely stunned by your question, but he would answer, and very nervously. “O-Oh, uhm, yeah, sure.”

⛧ after you guys hung out a lot you eventually actually asked if you wanted to date each other and of course he said yeah.

⛧ it would take him a while to get used to caring for a girl for like, ever. Zakk has never really had relationships besides in his mid teens because he wasn’t done with trying for romance back then. you guided Zakk through romance and he really enjoyed it. you two would go on dates, especially dates late at night. you’d also learn to cook or if you already have cooking skills, make food for the both of you because Zakk was incredibly hesitant to go out in public doing all that sweet shit. as i said in the past, he doesn’t wanna be seen as a huge softy.

⛧ you both would love each other blah blah blah and go to shows all the time together and do all that fun shit and grow old together and die together and love each other as cute little ghosts and haunt people for fun.

.⛧°+.+°⛧.

hope this wasn’t too disappointing!!

[writing-for-life]

Sandman Master Post and Intro

Hi, I’m so glad you’re here! This started out as a small writing blog but has developed a horrifying (^jk) life of its own over the past two years, so it was about time I just faced the facts:

A Sandman Blog it is!

I organised the links and tags to all my Sandman stuff for you to make it easier to find your way around.

I love getting asks, about analysis, about my fics, prompts or generally just to chat, so see this as an encouragement to slide into my inbox…

For quick reference:

[The Ultimate Sandman Character Tag Library]

[The Women of the Sandman Tag Library]

[Sandman Comics: Original Artists Library]

[Sandman Reread (Comics)]

[Sandman Rewatch (Netflix)]

[Sandman S2 News, Casting and Speculation]

[Sandman Reference: How to Collect the Comics, Companion Books, Annotations/Reference Literature etc]

[Sandman Movie Concept Art by Jill Thompson & John Watkiss]

[In Light of Recent Allegations]

Ordered by topics (recommended):

Sandman Meta-Analysis: My literary/conceptual/psychological analyses. I have also written some musical and art metas. You will find further links via all three.

The Sandman Book Club Community: Just follow the link if you’d like to join.

Sandman Fics & Poems: My own work, mostly m/f and f/f canon pairings and OCs, both long fics and shorter works.

I’m also Dream’s Therapist. I think we all agree he needs one.

Sandman Art (general tag that contains all art posts, from fan-art to gif-sets. Separate tag for official Sandman artists. Plus the very few pieces of my own art I’ve ever posted on here).

Sandman March Mania was an event we specifically ran for the comics art lovers, so check it out.

Sparkle Content Curation (a not-quite-serious collection of Dream/Morpheus thirst-trap fan-art and unhinged posts). Please also peruse the tags #contraceptive sparkles, #glitter herpes and #murphy and his cool hat (yes, I am sort of responsible for the #muhulhu tag on here) if this hell-site has left you in a state of being desperate for laughs

A Little Intro…

…and why this blog will keep on existing

Once there was a girl with so many words, so many images, so many songs in her head that had no place to go. So she decided some of them will just go here…

Well, that sounds a bit contrived, but it’s not entirely untrue. Apart from the “girl”-part, because I’m at the younger end of Gen X. Or the “no place to go”-part, because some of my work actually *did* go places. Just not the stuff I decided to put on here…

Which is mostly Sandman stuff right now, let’s be honest (I fell in love with it when I was 16, and it still has a tight grip on me three decades later). And the fact that my blog a wild mix between my metas, my fanfic and a bit of my doodling already shows the pull in different directions I have experienced for most of my life:

I guess I’m just a multi-hyphenate who can’t make up her mind what she wants to do with her life, so she tries to do it all and ends up burned out half of the time.

Somewhere along the way, I managed to publish a few novels under a pen name, and only a select few people know about it. And I intend to keep it that way.

I used to draw much more (mostly pencil and ink), but between working and having a family, something had to give, and if I have to choose, writing always comes first. But I doodle and experiment a lot in Procreate, and it usually helps me when I procrastinate on my writing. I drop the odd drawing in here (like my profile pic), but I don’t see myself as a fine artist, and I’m in perpetual awe of the talent I see on here.

This is just an account for unapologetically being me, with all my hyperfixations—and undoubtedly some pointless shitposts just for fun…

In light of recent happenings, I explained my personal stance and, by extension, why this blog will keep on existing.

[soyouareandrewdobson]

Asians are all the same, right? The racism of a company cock gurgling moron

Like herpes and unlike the Dobbear, I am back baby.

At this point, deepest apology for my long absence. Personal issues over the last two years prevented me from writing anything and also destroyed for the longest time any desire to really continue the blog.

However, I don’t want to let things unfinished and seeing how the hypocricyofandrewdobson still manages to get some rise out of old Dobson related stuff, I wanted to just return, in order to properly contribute a bit more critical thinking in regard to his old comics.

And while I will not immediately return to my retrospective of SYAC, here is at least (for a start) my opinion on one comic of his, that in my opinion just proved hilarious and controversial in hindsight, and rather racist even back then.

I admit, I don’t know anymore what the title of the comic here is. All I know is, that it came out around 2018, shortly after the release of his “Black Panther” comic, another malignant piece of Dobtrash that has made the rounds online ever since. However, unlike the Black Panther comic, which became the center of a lot of discussion regarding Dobson’s racist assumptions about comic book fans while ironically trying to present himself as woke, this one was weirdly drifting off into obscurity. Which is kinda weird, cause in my opinion, it is way more racist and actually kinda insulting to the very craft Dobson supposedly “dedicated” his life to.

Let me explain.

First, over the course of three panels, Dobson comes essentially off like he is considering the medium of comics as inferior to the medium of movies. Making it look as if comics are unsuccessful because they cannot rail in the same amount of money than certain flics and calling them at best nothing more but a pitching ground for corporations to create new shallow mass product.

Now I am a bit of a realist and I know that, especially in the world of mainstream American superhero comics, this is kinda the case. Most comic book characters, stories and franchises are owned by multibillion dollar corporations, who either have a direct hand in the creation of the product (via corporate mandate for example) and/or use the likeness of the product to make profit in additional, more valuable revenues than the printed medium. Such as cartoons, merchandise and movies. One example I can think of, to show that it isn’t just an American issue: Yugioh. The card game wouldn’t have come to be if there hadn’t been a manga starring a little boy putting together an ancient Egyptian puzzle, but while the original manga ended way back in March of 2004, the card game makes millions globally still after 25 years and counting.

But that doesn’t change the fact, that comics as a medium still have value. Without the stories told within their pages, we wouldn’t have characters such as Captain America, Superman, the Mask, the Ninja Turtles and so on to begin with. Don’t get me even started on stories that aren’t falling into the American mainstream comic trend, but still succeeded in the printed comic medium partly because of genuine artistic and profound value such as Maus, Barefoot Gen, Watchmen, V for Vendetta, TinTin and a shitton of (other) stuff from Europe and Asia.

So when Dobson, who always acted like he is proud to be a cartoonist and that comics are a superior medium to others, suddenly reduces them to just being a “pitch ground for better stuff down the line” at best, I as a fan of the medium and just the art of creating stories in itself, get kinda pissed.

Additionally, the way how he compares movies to be better than comics, is severely flawed.

He brings up the fact, that “Captain America: Civil War” made over one billion dollars at the box office as an example, while pointing out the fact, that most single comic issues barely manage to sell 100.000 copies, while holding up a copypasted “Civil War” issue.

Already, Dobson essentially compares apples with bananas, while also giving both false and incomparable data, that also ignores many aspects to be considered.

For starters: He compares the earnings of both movies and comics with two different values. For movies, he goes by the monetary profit a superhero movie could possibly make, while for the comic issue, he goes by the total number of copies sold.

But here is the thing: Assuming the average selling price of a comic is at 4 dollars for a single 30 page issue, selling 100.000 copies would ring in like 400.000 dollars. And considering that producing one issue likely costs a company less than 20.000 dollars (obvious costs for mass production and distribution not withstanding) they can still make a decent profit this way from ONE issue alone. One issue. Not multiple issues of a long running, but sadly underperforming series. All of that by the way doesn’t even account for the fact, that most single issues at best tell only a quarter of a decent short story nowadays and ignores later “long term” factors, such as reprints of the issue, late term buying of the issue, tradepaperback sells of the issue, the longterm effect and cultural impact the issue may have on the actual series or plot continuity  (such as Amazing Spiderman 122, aka “The Night Gwen Stacy Died”). Don’t get me even started on the fact, that many of these issues get first sold in the US and only over the course of one year or longer may then additionally be sold in other parts of the world, therefore bringing in even more money for the publisher.

Example: The Duck comics by Don Rosa, which earn more than four times more in Europe, than they ever did in America, despite the guy being from California. Finally, a a little add addendum: that example Dobson gives indirectly via the “Civil War” issue? A quick google search revealed, that Civil War issue 1 sold over 300k copies in May of 2006 alone. Sure, not necessarily the best numbers ever for a single issue (as evident by the following list: https://bookriot.com/bestselling-comics-of-all-time/ )but still nothing to be ashamed of.

And yes, I know that we live currently in a time, where comic book sells have dropped significantly for a variety of reasons, one of them being an overall lack of decent stories. But as long as other stuff still manages to run freaking circles around American superheroes (*cough* One Piece *cough*) I wouldn’t say the medium itself is dead. Just a specific branch of it is suffering from a lack of quality and the customers are jumping ship.

A superhere movie meanwhile is a completely different beast. Ever since “The Avengers” came out in 2012, most superhero movies are 150-250 million dollar behemoths, that get overhyped by advertisement campaigns that are almost equally as expensive and try to trick the audience into believing, that they all are somehow the next big mindblowing thing on the big screen. Plus there hasn’t really been a superhero movie in the last 10+ years, that didn’t release simultaneously worldwide, instead of only coming out in the USA, and then a few months later, in other parts of the world.

So is it any wonder then, if a superhero movie that got advertised like the second coming of a saint, makes 1 billion, when there are already billions of potential customers worldwide all at once when the product launches?

That number btw becomes actually less impressive, once you start to think about how it came to be. Something our blue bear obviously didn’t.

See, on average every movie theater demands like what, 12-14 dollars per movie nowdays?

If we divide the box office of Civil war (1.152 billion btw) with 12 dollars, that makes on average 100 million people worldwide who watched the movie. A bit more than one or two percent of the worlds population. Not to forget, that of the box office success we have to substract such things as production cost of the movie, advertisement, the earnings of the theaters… so suddenly the movie may at best have had only earned one quarter of its box office for Disney as actual profit.

Not to forget, Dobson made that comic in 2018, when superhero movies on average did ring in so much money, because of the hype machine. But now we have 2023 and within the last five years (and especially 2023 itself) we have seen how superhero movies can also utterly fail to make money or even earn just enough to make back the production cost. Birds of Prey, Eternals, Ant Man 3, that Secret Invasion streaming show that still cost over 200 million… Do I need to get on?

Bottom line, Dobson’s indirect jab at comics as the less profitable revenue doesn’t hold that much water really in the real world, where once the hype dies down, comics may actually prove themselves as the more valuable longterm medium. Even if it may just be for the fact, that they end up staying longer relevant in the popcultural subconscious than the current movies, which tend to lose relevance with each new hastily produced and released installment in the franchise.

But where this comic really shines and shows Dobson’s ignorance on a cultural level, is in the last panel. When all off sudden it turns “racial” by claiming that Asian people, unlike “traditional” comic readers (aka white, in Dobbear s eyes therefore instantly racist people), would eat a Marvel character like Amadeus Cho up.

Question Dobson: Why do you assume, they would eat him up? You give no real argument based on anything the character does storywise, that the “target audience” may find admirable. So I can only think, that your reasoning is, because he is ever so slightly east asian coded.

Boy, do we have to unpack not just a can of worms, but a whole package of cans now.

First, the chosen language by saying “eat it up”. When being a writer, you should know that you need at times to choose your words wisely, because of the sheer implications they can carry. And the statement “eat it up” sounds way to close to a negative statement like “suck it up”. Making it come off as if Dobson considers Asian people to be mindless cattle that will consume the grub the House of Mouse will give them without question or any desire for actual quality to it.

Second, it recks of a certain mind set I hate within the American entertainment industry and some of its creators and consumers. That mind set being, that “non-traditional” American cultures supposedly don’t know better than Americans in what is okay for the sake of representation and entertainment or not. It’s a mindset that goes beyond the necessity of e.g. localizing a foreign product to the national market, by e.g. creating a sterilized, corporately mandated and rather unrealistic depiction of another culture within their product, that will fall apart as soon as the people who are supposed to be represented get a proper look at it and realize, how pandering and often times badly researched, if not outright offensive, it is.

Only recently did we see in the world of animation how that can backfire, when Disney released the trailer for “Primos” an upcoming animated show supposedly about a half Latina girl spending her summer vacation with her annoying cousins, people calling it based on the intro (and a leaked pilot) pandering towards a latino audience in a racist manner. And guess what: currently, Disney shelves it and tries to bury its existence like Dobson his old inflation art.

Dobson himself has actually indulged in that sort of shit kinda, back with his infamous Nintendo comic.

Essentially calling the “true”, Nintendo corporation approved depiction of his childhood Nintendo heroes disgraceful, for not falling in line with the late 80s depictions he saw in localized, made in America products such as the DiC cartoons. That and minor homophobia mixed with misogyny by calling Link “girly” for having longer blond hair since Ocarina of Time and blaming fangirls for it.

Third, and that is kinda related to my prior point, the reality of things is, that “Asians” actually did not eat up that sort of thing in the last couple of years. Sure, there is always that thing about a Chinese market. the big movie companies try to pander to and may succeed with some dumb action flics featuring big robots.

But the reality is, that not even people living in a dictatorship will eat up every trash you give to them, just because it comes from Hollywood or is supported by their glorious leadership. Disney tried to create two pandering messes of movies for Chinese people to watch, called Mulan (the live action adaptation) and that Shang Chi movie. And how did they do there? Oh right! The government did not even allow Shang Chi to be released and Mulan was released but supposedly didn’t do so well, considering (COVID not withstanding) it only made 70 million globally!

Don’t get me even started on every human right controversy in relation to the later, starting with filming in China near a concentration camp and ending with the main actress being essentially a Chinese propaganda puppet.

So, if those movies flopped, why would Chinese people for example flock for an Asian Hulk? A hulk that is not even Chinese but Korean.

See, this is another issue that fails with the example: The actual choice of character Dobson name dropped is actually kinda terrible.

For those unaware: Amadeus Cho is a supporting character in the Marvel comics, created in 2005 by American writer Greg Pak and artist Takeshi Miyazawa. The later, despite the name being very east Asian, sounding, actually being from Canada. Now both do have east Asian roots so to speak (Pak  e.g. is the son of an Korean-american man with a Caucasian woman), but they also have grown up within a society that taught them both western social values more so than we would see in east Asian countries. So with the creators already not necessarily having the most real life experience with the average mindset of a Korean citizen, can we really say that their actual creation helps “represent” those people of a foreign, non-american culture?

And that is not even covering stuff like the actual story of the character itself.

See, in the comics, Cho is supposed to be an American-Korean genius (wish fullfillment much, Greg?) and one of the smartest people in the Marvel Universe. His parents named him after Amadeus Mozart (a pretty white motherfucker as far as I remember) and he grew up under Methodist beliefs. So basically the “Korean heritage” of the character has already been thrown out of the window. Now I don’t expect the character to act stereotypical Korean, listen to K-pop, declare bulgogi to be his favorite dish or any of that shit. But when you want to sell me the character as being in some way or another connected to his ancestral culture, shouldn’t he engage at least in some “Korean coded” things?

I mean, the character of Anne Boonchuy in Amphibia is a Thai-American who acts more like a 13 year old girl that learns to be less selfish and impulsive over the course of the show and whose “heritage” isn’t thrown at us, the viewer, most of the time. In fact, Anne herself acknowledges that she e.g. can’t really speak thai, despite her own mother being fluent in it and a season 3 episode reveals, that Anne is “begrudgingly” a part of the L.A. thai community. And yet, in connection to the shows story and as part of Anne’s characterization, her heritage is acknowledged and plays a part of who she is. Even if it simply means she knows how to cook certain thai dishes, loves her parents and their customs, helps out in their restaurant, can speak a few words thai and knows the basics of Muay Thai, a form of martial arts (and fighting sport) from Thailand.

Amadeus doesn’t even have Korean parents anymore, because they were killed as part of his tragic hero backstory. Nor has he ever visited an Asian country. Oppps.

To build further up on it, Amadeus becomes for the longest time simply a major supporting character in the Marvel universe for the likes of Hulk and Hercules, two white coded characters. Sure, he plays a major role in the defeat of some cosmic horror level villains (such as Mikaboshi in the Chaos God storyline most people forgot even existed) but it takes a long time for him to become a “A-lister” so to speak.

In fact, according to Wikipedia, it wasn’t till after “Secret Wars” in 2016 (eleven years after the character was created), that Amadeus thanks to a chain of events eventually got his chance to Hulk out. And then they still had to kill Bruce Banner to make Amadeus “stand out” initially (don’t worry, Bruce came back. I mean, characters actually staying dead in comics, so that heroes can learn there are consequences? Preposterous) In fact, Amadeus hasn’t really proven himself as a decent “solo” act. Instead he became a member of the Champions (among Miles Morales, Mrs. Marvel, Vision’s daughter Viv. Nova and Cyclops), essentially creating yet another superhero team for teenaged vigilantes. Despite the fact, Cho himself should be by now in his mid 20s.

Now look, I do not want to shit talk the character. Partly because I haven’t read everything he was in myself and partly because in the few things I did see him in (both pre- and post Hulk) he was okay. He is a decent hero and person, who tries to do good, even if he screws up here and there. That is something I can admire in a character in general. But he is not a good “representation” of another culture, because his complexion and minor physical features aside, he is NOT embodying even minor values or traditions of that foreign culture. He is simply a Korean-American (or technically Canadian), who falls more on the American side of things.

So essentially, Dobson who virtue signaled on multiple occasions how bad it is when companies he didn’t like tried to speak on behalf of other cultures, would have no problem at all to ask for Asian people to swallow this obviously “Made in American” product. The “Made in America” line actually working both on a metaphorical and a storytelling level, cause trying to google what “east Asian coded” heroes in the Marvel Universe actually come from an Asian country instead of being simply born on American soil, is pretty damn small.

After 20 minutes I only found Shang Chi, as he was born in China, and that character was created as part of kung-fu exploitation in the 70s by white dudes.

Yaiks

However, none of that tops the next two points that really sell Dobson to me as an American centralistic racist. Or at least a twat who doesn’t understand how through bad wording he comes of as ignorant of other people’s cultures.

The way he generalizes Asian people in his statement, while also ignoring the actual accomplishments in the creation of entertainment in multiple Asian countries.

If you’ve read closely what I typed, you may have seen that I used the term Asian at times in tandem with the term “east Asian” to e.g. describe Amadeus Cho.

And that had a very deliberate reason. While I was not a fan of geography in school, even I know that Asia as a continent is not “nationally” as homogenous as let’s say Australia or North America. In fact, Asia is the biggest continent on the planet, hosts more than half of earth’s population and consists of at least 47 internationally acknowledged states.

States such as Turkey, Russia, Afghanistan, Pakistan, India, China, Japan, Malaysia, Thailand, Vietnam, North- and South Korea, Egypt, Israel, Iraq, Iran and so on.

Now what all these states have in common, is that they have their own unique historical, social and “racial” culture and background. Heck, religiously speaking, Asia is the cradle of the world.

As such, Dobson stating that a “Korean coded” character such as Amadeus Cho (who is only Korean on the most surface level and would technically just be a legacy character of yet another white person) would be an immediate hulk smash hit with all these different people of different backgrounds…. Yeah, it sounds like condescending, colonization inspired shit, a smooth brain would come up with.

To Dobson “Asia”, at least based on that comic, is only defined as the “yellow skinned” people from the far east, who like rice, noodles, spicy food and give us anime, Godzilla, fireworks, buddhism and communism. It does not include anyone from the middle east or of more European ancestry. And if you are even remotely familiar about history, you would also know that Japanese, Koreans and Chinese all around do not e.g. like to be thrown into a pot with the others for a variety of reasons. Many of them political.

Or to sum it up even shorter: Dobson insinuated that a very shallow, “east Asian” coded American comic character would be an immediate hit with more than 47 different countries, ignoring that not all of them share the same background despite being part of the “same” landmass. And in doing so, he simultaneously generalized and denounced entire groups of people based on their racial and cultural background, which in as far as I am aware of, is considered racist.

But the “racism” is supposedly justified, because “representation” matters, it would be giving the middle finger to “traditional” comic fans and those nations and their culture are underrepresented globally.

Which is baloney.

Don’t get me wrong, I myself think that representation does matter. But the world does not necessarily rely on the good old US-Ayy only to give it to us.

Cause a lot of the Asian nations I brought up here? They have their own entertainment industry and stories, which again, get ignored by Dobson to make a dumb and false point.

I mean, manga is currently dominating the international comic market, all while Japan has also a booming animation industry and some of the most iconic heroes in modern popculture with the likes of Son Goku, Kamen Rider, Super Sentai etc.

China has a prominent -if propaganda driven- movie industry.

India has Bollywood and delivers some of the most ridiculous but awesome musical movies on the planet.

Russia had authors such as Tolstoy and movie directors, that redefined the “art” of filmmaking.

Korea had a few years ago one of the biggest streaming hits with Squid Game, while also earning an Oscar for a movie titled Dobs- I mean “Parasite”.

Egypt, Iran, Iraq, Turkey… even nations that have not entertainment living up to “western standards” still produce stuff in some way or form to entertain the masses and their people. Just google up the character Kara Murat aka the avenger of Anatolia.

And don’t get me even started on the sheer ton of mythology, stories and history each of their cultures have provided the world with. Journey to the West? Baba Yaga, the entirety of the Gilgamesh epos...

And yet, there is this indirect assumption by Dobson, that all of them would be so deprived of “heroes” in their media and folklore, they would letch on second hand shop Hulk? Fuck off, Dobbear. I know you like to suck corporate cock as long as you think they are woke and you have childhood nostalgia for them, but this is pathetic. Take Amadeus before A Rama Raju comes around and roundhouse kicks him back to Canada. Then get the taste of mouse smegma of your Disney cock gobbling lips.

[rpmemesbyarat]

RP Memes from Reddit’s Thread “What is denied by everyone but is actually 100% real?”

“You are not immune to propaganda.” “Everyone is susceptible to bias. We all think it's something that just affects other people.” “Part of having bias always is that your think yours is the thought out reasonable and just one.” “You are much more likely to believe whatever side of a story you hear first.” “They knowingly put out harmful fearmongering misinformation, the issue a retraction several days later that less than 1/10th of the original audience will hear about, and even less will believe.” “The first thing we judge a person on is looks.” “Everyone is stereotyping and judging others constantly, it’s human nature.” “We judge others on their actions and ourselves on our intentions.” “This is going to sound crass and unkind, but sometimes I wish I was less intelligent both intellectually and emotionally so I could just go through life dumb and happy.” “You should not confuse your idea of another person with what they really are. You will never know how it feels to be them. How the world looks from their point of view. You will always only know your side of the story.” “Without the money, I have zero desire to teach kids.” “People often brush off gut feelings as just random, but there’s some real science that suggests intuition can actually lead us to good decisions.” “Everyone judges, it's just a matter of keeping it in your mind or letting it out.” “You are the enemy in someone’s story.” “There will always be someone who doesn't like you, for whatever reason, no matter how good or kind you are.” “You can be the sweetest peach on the tree, but some people just don’t like peaches.” “I have this plush shark and can confirm it brings pure joy.” “Did you know the giant snake plush is a PUPPET?!” “This “you can do anything” rhetoric just messes with a kid’s mind.” “If nobody is perfect, then there is no "The one." You just have to decide if someone's pros outweigh their cons for you personally.” “"Don't judge a book by its cover" that's literally what covers are for, so you can judge the book.” “I saw your text but responded in my mind.” “Beauty is a privilege and a super power.” “Everyone is not, and cannot be beautiful. And that's okay.”“I'm pretty sure that most other animals probably think all Humans are ugly as fuck. Imagine an animal with no hair except for a few patches over the body, walking around on two legs with the other two legs dangling at the side with extra long toes hanging off it. By our own standards of animals we find cute and animals we find ugly I reckon humans are definitely somewhere at the ugly end.”

“The idea that we only use a small percentage of our brain, often cited as 10%, is a myth.”

“Everybody lies.”

“The same people you talk trash with are talking trash about you.”

“Something like 80% of humans have herpes. Cold sores are herpes. If you’ve had a cold sore ever in your life you have herpes.”

“If someone says “I’m not that person anymore”, and their actions seem to confirm it, might be time to let it go.”

“Capitalism only exists to funnel all the wealth we create to a very few elite.”

“Girls fart.”

“People seriously underestimate their ability to do things they consider bad or wrong. No one is above an amoral act.”

“You will be too old to work one day and you will die. You will be very sorry if you don’t start planning these things decades ahead.”

“The world would be better with more cheese on everything.”

“This one I think is sad but humans are tribal animals and we honestly just don't like people we don't see as being in our tribe. This isn't about race or anything I just mean in the most general sense.”

“We all pee in the shower.”

[supergirl000983]

Prompt List

1. “For gods sake, guys! We’re NOT dating”

2. “You’re still the same guy I fell in love with”

3. “Gotcha!”

4. “Why would you prank me with something like that?!”

5. “There’s no way in hell I’m doing that”

6. “I literally don’t know how someone can be that stupid”

7. “Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies”

8. “What are you doing to me?”

9. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m really turned on by that”

10. “Give me my phone back!”

11. “YOU knew how important this was for me!”

12. “Oh shut the fuck up”

13. “You’re the one that labeled this as ‘just fun’ so I don’t own you shit”

14. “Don’t play with me, because you’re gonna lose”

15. “Forget it, you’re not even worth it”

16. “Say that one more time and you’re done”

17. “I’m no one’s property”

18. “I have a child?”

19. “I’m done with this bullshit”

20. “Why? Why did you leave?”

21. “How could you hide something like that from me!”

22. “I panicked, okay?!’

23. “I can’t believe I’m sitting in a mall jail with you of all people”

24. “Now you wanna talk? Well fuck you”

25. “How did this happened?”

26. “Just one drink”

27. “Hello? We’re in the middle of something”

28. “Oh how cute! You actually think I give a fuck”

29. “Mess with me and you’ll regret being born”

30. “I don’t fuck around”

31. “Let’s see if you can keep up”

32. “This means nothing”

33. “There’s the door. Feel free to get the fuck out”

34. “Put that down”

35. “Don’t do it, please”

36. “I’m not the same, I’m different”

37. “Nobody cares about me anymore, so why should I keep trying?”

38. “Listen to me, okay? We’re getting out of here, together”

39. “This is so stupid”

40. And yet, you’re still here”

41. “You think this is a joke? This is my life!”

42. “So this was all a lie?”

43. “We have nothing to talk about”

44. “Are you going to tell him?”

45. “Is better off this way”

46. “Hold up, you what?”

47. “You’re the worst roommate”

48. “Why are you fucking a stranger in my bed?!”

49. “Please go get herpes as far as you can from this house”

50. “Be my guest”

51. “I can do whatever I want, we’re not dating, remember?”

52. “You wanna get food at 2 am?”

53. “I will always protect you”

54. “You moved on, so did I”

55. “You’re not the same”

56. “Yeah, well, people change”

57. “You had no right to do that!”

58. “Why do you always convince me of doing the stupidest shit”

59. “How is it that you're so stupid and so hot at the same time?”

60. “Call 911”

61. “This is the last time I’m letting you in my house”

62. “It was an accident!”

63. “You almost burn my house down!”

64. “I can’t keep doing this”

65. “Just be honest with me!”

66. I’m not gonna be here when she breaks your heart"

67. “Just one more night”

68. “Is this how it all ends?”

69. “You’re here!”

70. “I wanna go home”

71. “I’m not letting you go and we both know that you don’t want me to either”

72. “Keep talking all you want but you can’t deny that you want me as much as I want you”

73. “You broke my nose!”

74. “As if you were a fucking angel”

75. “Don’t make me laugh”

76. “Yeah… I don’t do relationships”

77. “Let’s face it! I’m just one of your many booty calls!”

78. “You’re nothing like them

79. “Did I actually mean something to you, ever?”

80. “I’m starting to think I’m actually going to hell”

[markscherz]

So a while back you made a post about the flattest frog, and it proceeded to go like this for me:

"Teehee, what a silly looking guy! I would like to learn more about them!"

*looks up more pictures*

"Oh......oh no. Hmmm. Nope. Done with that."

(I will say that I respect and love nature in all its possibilities, even the ones I don't particularly like. It just really tested that, lol)

Thank you for your work to share your knowledge and also wonderful frog pictures. 🐸 💕

Yeah so actually part of the reason my recent posts mentioning Pipa pipa have not featured discussion of its reproductive mode, and why I didn’t choose it to represent the Horror genre in my fiction genre list, is that I know it makes some people deeply uncomfortable. Also, because I feel like it’s quite common knowledge what Pipa pipa does, and what I’d really like to do is introduce the People of Tumblr to frogs and other herps they’ve never heard of before, or to other aspects of its morphology and ecology than just the reproductive mode. Not that I won’t make posts about Pipa reproduction in the future! I definitely will. I just don’t want to focus on it right now, because I think there are other things of similar or greater interest.

Sorry for not warning about what a Google search would yield. For anyone curious, please see this as a fair trypophobia warning.

[living-with-herpes]

2 years on

So I completely forgot about this blog and have recently found it again.

It’s two years later and reading what I wrote makes me want to cry for myself. I honestly was so convinced my life was over and I can completely tell you, it is not!

I won’t lie, I was very low for a fair while and I cried about it a lot. I continued to google every which way under the sun and continued to terrify myself. I read so many statistics it made my mind swim.

But slowly I accepted what had happened.

I was so angry about it and so upset. I did some research into testing for it and in the uk apparently doctors don’t routinely test for herpes for 3 main reasons:

1) the tests are roughly 50% accurate if it is not swabbing an actual sore. A blood test will just test for antibodies and as not every person who carries the virus reacts to it, some people might be carrying the virus and not have needed to produce antibodies

2) the nhs doesn’t consider herpes to be dangerous enough to need testing for regularly. Let’s face it, you wouldn’t go to the doctor after kissing a stranger on a night out and ask them to take a blood test to test for a cold sore (hsv1 herpes) just in case

3) doctors consider the mental health implications of knowing you have the virus, worse than the symptoms of the virus itself so they almost think it’s better that sometimes people don’t know. I can personally attest to this.

Every site you go to the statistics vary slightly but the general consensus is that roughly 80% of the population have herpes (hsv1/hsv2).

I thought this diagnosis would be the end of my sex life, no one would want to touch me again. I was so wrong. Using barrier contraception like condoms really does minimise the potential for passing it on.

There is lots of talk on the internet of whether people need to disclose a herpes diagnosis or not to new partners. Again after all, people would disclose that they’ve had a cold sore before. I’m still undecided on this one but so far I have told my partners before sleeping with them. I can tell you now that no one has ran for the hills, in fact most don’t even care.

I’ve learnt a lot, in fact if I was on mastermind now I think my specialist subject could be herpes!

Basically the herpes virus lives in your nerves and can flare up from time to time, lots of things can trigger this from a cut, to stress or illness. Not every time you have a flare up, you have an actual outbreak with the little blisters. When you have a flare up with or without the blisters, it’s called viral shedding and this is called viral shedding. You are particularly contagious when viral shedding, and if you don’t always have blisters, this is why it’s so important to use protection as you don’t know when this happens.

Your first outbreak is usually considered the worst and in my experience it completely was! Since then I’ve had a few outbreaks. But now an outbreak consists of one tiny blister.

My doctors put my antiviral on a repeat prescription for me so I have made it so that I always have a pack in my bathroom cupboard so I can start them as soon as I feel one coming. It’s only a two day course.

Honestly it doesn’t affect my life massively at all now. It’s all manageable and I had no reason to worry.

Obviously I would prefer to have continued living my life without herpes. But it really is no different now I’m living with it.

I’m even now at the point where sometimes I go weeks without remembering that I have herpes.

Honestly all I could say to someone going through a diagnosis is, be sad if you need to be for a while but know there is a light at the end of the tunnel and it does not mean your life is over.

Xo

[starveson]

Hello everyone, Trying to launch my book on Gumroad, but it won’t go live unless someone buys it first — which makes no sense. So I’m dropping Chapter One here for free.

If you want the full thing or the Gumroad link, just DM me

⸻

Title: Love Is a Lie, But the Children Are Real

Description:

2,212 words of raw, filthy, primal wisdom.

Breaking down the sexual desires of each gender

Why her love feels like nagging

How to kill the pressure before it kills the marriage

Uncovering the only thing that truly matters in life

Fueled by evolutionary psychology, two drops of neuroendocrinology— forming your robust man’s manual.

Chapter 1: The Window Theory ⸻

A guy sits at home. Looks out the window. Sees a girl. A stranger.

She gives him that come-and-get-it look. Blonde, brunette, tall, short — fat, skinny — doesn’t matter. She’s his type.

In that moment?

Ten out of ten guys would go. Wouldn’t even finish the thought — already halfway there.

Well… nine, actually.

The last guy? He used to run. But now he doesn’t even make eye contact with mirrors.

Because he looked too hard once… and the mirror looked back. And said:

“You’ve got herpes now, king. Welcome to the eternal club of post-lust clarity.”

But the rest?

One sock on, pants half down — already moving. Because God knows — if she’s down, he’s down.

That’s the Window Theory.

⸻

Now flip it.

A girl looks out the window. Sees a guy. A stranger.

Tall. Dark. Mean.

He’s the kind of man women aren’t supposed to want — but they do. The kind that makes them hold their breath without knowing why.

And in that moment?

Maybe one out of ten women would go.

Not because she wasn’t tempted.

But because she feels temptation is a warning more than an invitation.

She’s gotta ask first.

“What’s your favorite color?”

Not out of romance. Not even out of curiosity. It’s fear. A healthy, built-in fear.

That’s her brain doing math her mouth never studied. Old fear. Older than fire.

Wondering:

Is this man gonna stay? Or will I be dumped by the side of the road like I never mattered?

Because a woman’s worst nightmare is giving birth alone in the cold, dark cave.

Bone-rattling so hard her whole body jerks. Blood and piss run down her thighs, soaking into the cold dirt.

Barely able to hold seven pounds of slick, crying life against her chest.

No fire. No food. No man’s shoulder to lean on. Just her.

And the deep, long, wet howls echoing through the dark — the kind that makes the air itself hold still.

Men don’t have that fear.

Matter of fact — most men don’t even realize they brought a thing into the world until it starts shouting:

“Papa!” from the living room.

⸻

Psychologists say that men are hardwired to spread their seeds. I say that’s bullshit.

Because if that was true, how come we don’t see men sneaking into alleyways, impregnating hookers all over the globe?

How come I never heard a guy saying he feels like impregnating somebody today?

Men are not rabbits they fuck because fucking, for them, is all fun with no downsides.

If men are hardwired for anything, it’s this:

Fuck woman. Never think. Instinct.

Not to spread seeds. Just blind, dumb pleasure with no brakes.

But if it’s true —

if men really did save humanity from extinction—by fucking it

then you know what?

It was our pleasure, ladies.

We saved the species by fucking. We’ll fuck it forward.

That’s the Window Theory.

Same window.

Same desire.

Different danger.

[zalrb]

Yeah they absolutely do that to her in the books! They are MEAN to her lol like I do get she needs to be punished but they are just genuinely pretty awful to her even prior to that 😭 they softened them up for the show a lot.

But actually they softened up the girls a lot too. They are all pretty terrible a lot of the times in the books. ESPECIALLY Hanna - she slut shames, body shames, objectifies herself and other women, it’s very apt to when it was written 😭😭 I mean… all the girls are slut shamey and have that late 2000s/early 2010s internalized misogyny in them but Hanna the most of all lol

Spencer gives off the “I’m rich and smart and pretty and have a good pedigree behind me, therefore I’m better than everyone else” vibes

Aria & Emily ummm… sorry to say they’re about as bland as their show counterparts in a lot of ways. Aria gets uppity about being sooo different from what she calls the “typical rosewood boys/girls” & Emily is just kind of a pushover like she is in the show lol.

But separately & as a group they do wayyy worse things in the books than they do in the show. Here’s a couple book only plot lines we missed out on 😂

• Spencer becoming addicted to adderall in college, getting caught with it while with her roommate, and calling Hanna while at the police station to ask her to plant drugs in her roommate’s things so Spencer can put all the blame on her and get off. Hanna does it 😭

• Aria is dating Noel in the books and PUSHES a girl off a ski lift after the girl tells her she’s going to try and sleep with Noel (kinda relatable)

• Hanna tells a big group of people from school that her stepsister has herpes because she ASSUMED her stepsister was about to say something about her 😂😭

• become convinced a girl in Jamaica is somehow Alison even though she’s supposed to be very dead by that point and when the girl threatens them they push her off a cliff, she dies, and they don’t tell anyone

There’s way more but that’s just off the top of my head lol. Sorry for rambling but I’ve been rereading the books & it’s my special interest right now

I don't know why but the "Hanna does it" made me HOWL. But honestly, I would prefer this because it makes more sense when they're ALL terrible because it's like what I said in I think my first review or at least second where there may be a mean girl leader/queen bee, but the entire group is also mean, it's not one person emotionally terrorizing an entire group so reading these things has me like yeah, I can see why those girls would be friends with Alison because they suck!

[briangriffin93]

WHY DO YOU THINK THIS??

I hate this misconception so much it actually makes my FUCKING blood boil. Brian has flaws, has made mistakes, but a horrible person? Nope. Not at all.

EVERY time he did horrible things he immediately felt guilt and apologized at the end of the episode. Even if it was to someone as awful as Quagmire. Even if it was as horrendous as giving his family members herpes (which was never out of malice but out of avoiding the embarrassment of telling them).

Brian is the image when you think classic liberal, the beating heart of a democratic nation, stressed from imperialistic ways, people like this don’t know the troubled times we would be without Brian. Brian is the Yin to Peter’s Yang. Whenever Peter went off to do something outrageous Brian was ALWAYS there to help Peter and in the end he has always backed up Brian. He would always make sure Stewie is okay whenever they went in wacky adventures, and Stewie always loved him despite his flaws and mistakes.

To put it rather bluntly:

BRIAN GRIFFIN IS THE VOICE OF REASON

And yes I know, when Brian fucks up he fucks up disastrously, but can you really blame a poor dog who’s had it hard? Brian was a stray that became loved by a family known as The Griffins, and they have always loved him even throughout all his mishaps. He’s done more good than bad for Quahog and his family. Hw stood up for gay rights as well as dog rights. His inspiring nature to overcome should be greatly acknowledged.

Sorry this was a long rant but this comment kept me up all night I had a lot of thoughts stirring.

[maydaygmooh]

About Daeun

You know, apart from the fact that we deal with this boring af rumor every month her impunity worries me

We know that Hybe is shit and never protects Jimin and some more bts mmbrs but *conspiracy time* I can’t help but think this woman is paid

Daeun pops up after every scandal in the herpes duo - these are the tricks of the tkkrs, ok. But now? Are they preparing for a jikook travel show? Or is it an attempt to shift attention away from the company's problems?

I genuinely don’t have a clue. The direct involvement of mentally incapable taekook shippers with her is clear, but I don’t know to what extent or if there has been interactions with her and active shippers.

I mean, good luck to that people. If this makes them feel better for a second and after that go back to their miserable life of shipping two straight dudes, cool.

They are trying to make this bigger than what it is, at most she is a fan, and if remotely she ends up actually knowing him, how classless.