#I don’t know what other tags to put as triggers but please let me know any others you need me to add

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Crushed 20

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, manipulation, cheating, sleazy behaviour, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your next door neighbours hook up, bringing to surface deep-seated feelings.

Characters: Colin Shea, Jonathan Pine

Note: Welcome back.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you like my dog loves belly rubs (that’s a lot). Take care. 💖

“Darling,” Jonathan enters the apartment as he always does. In the days since you got there, it’s all become routine. Almost too much so. “You called? Was my phone not in service?” 

You look up from the book borrowed from the shelf in the hallway. A thriller that’s less exciting than it genre may suggest. You fold your hands over the pages. 

“I haven’t heard anything. About my suspension.” You frown, “how about you? Have they said anything?” 

“Oh, fawn, you know if I do, you will be the first to know. And as ever, I will vouch for your innocence,” he nears and strokes your cheek as he looks down at you. “Forgive me for letting my pride drive me to such rabidity. It is only that cretin that makes me this way. The way he insulted you.” 

“Hm, I know, it’s just... I feel useless. I don’t want to be living out of your hand forever.” 

“Out of my hand? Darling, it is how these things work, is it not? One day, I might require your support, eh?” He tickles along your hairline, “you should enjoy the time you have to yourself.” He looks around, eyes narrowing as he scans the apartment. “My, my, this place is tidy.” 

“I vacuumed. Lit a candle. Did the dishes,” you sit up and close the book. “I’m terribly bored. Maybe...” you stand and take the novel under your arm, “I should start looking for a new job. I don’t think they’re going to take me back. I’m not like you. I’m not important.” 

He turns on you and crosses his arms, “darling, please. Firstly, you are not permitted to speak of yourself such. I won’t have that. Secondly, am I to feel worse than I already do? I would’ve gladly taken the slap on the wrist. I said as much in my interview.” 

You swallow and look down guiltily, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. I just... I don’t know.” 

“You should be getting ready for the rehearsal dinner. The wedding is just around the corner,” he girds. 

“Well, it’s Geri’s day. I just have to show up.” 

“And look as stunning as you always do. Have you made an appointment for your hair and makeup? That might cheer you a little,” he suggests. 

“I can’t... I can’t afford that. I can do my own,” you insist. 

“I can,” he counters. “I’ll ask around for recommendations and you’ll book something tomorrow before all the appointments are snatched up. Won’t you?” 

“If that’s what you want,” you shrug. 

His lips form a straight line and he drops his hands to his hips, “I want whatever you want, fawn, yet is seems even you do not know what that is.” He looks down with a solemn hum, “I wonder if you should even want me.” He turns away slowly. “I know you think of him still. You have such a deep heart, darling, and I shouldn’t blame you but it hurts all the same. I should be the only one.” 

“You-- you are. It’s just... It was just a crush,” you step closer. 

“Was?” He peeks over his shoulder, searching your face desperately. 

You nod, “yes. We’re together now.” 

He smiles. Just a little. He turns back to you and puts his hands on your upper arms. “I... I can’t tell you how lovely that is to hear you say. I am not so nervous anymore.” 

You flutter your lashes, “nervous? You?” 

He chuckles softly, “yes, of course. Why shouldn’t I be afraid that you won’t see me as I see you? You are my world.” 

His declaration takes your breath away. You stare at him. You don’t know what to say. You like him. A lot. But you can’t lie and say you feel everything for him. That you don’t still get a pang in your chest when you think of Colin. Even if you know what you should feel, you can’t force it. 

“I’m... trying my best,” you step closer. “I... I have a surprise.” 

“A surprise?” 

“Mm, well, like I said, I’ve been bored,” you grab his wrist and gently pull his hand from his hip. “Come on.” 

“Shall I close my eyes?” He asks playfully. 

“Don’t be cheesy,” you warn. “I was googling stuff about England and I found a recipe for a dessert. Um, sticky toffee pudding? It took me a while to get it right but I think I figured it out.” You open the fridge as you pull him with you. He stops before the interior’s glow as you point to the cake pan. “For dessert.” 

“For me? You made that? All by yourself?” He asks. 

You nod proudly as your cheeks tweak. “Yeah. I love baking but my place was never big enough and I know it’s not much but I wanted to say thank you.” 

“You mean to stab me in the heart,” he accuses and you flinch in surprise. “The way you are plucking on my heartstrings, I think I might completely break, darling.” He turns you to him and smirks down at you. “How have I been so lucky to come so far across the world and find the only treasure in it?” 

You giggle. He’s so sweet it hurts your teeth. It makes you feel worse for spending all day moping. 

“I’ll make dinner. I didn’t find any cool recipes for that though,” you say. 

“My darling,” he draws you near and the fridge shuts on its own, “you are all I need in this moment.” 

💔

The artist, Marissa, helps you down from the chair. You’re dizzy from reclining for so long and the pins in your hair jab your scalp. You glance at your reflection and blanch. You look like you but... not. In a good way. In a way prettier way than usual. 

She leads you out to the counter at the front of the salon. Jonathan stands as he sees you. You thought he might busy himself elsewhere. You’re surprised he stuck around that long. 

“Wow,” his blue eyes shine as he nears, “you look splendid. Not that you aren’t always immaculately gorgeous, darling.” 

Marissa giggles from behind the till, “aw, that’s so sweet. Is this the first family event for you two?” 

You nod as you face her, Jonathan’s hand hover behind your back as it so often does. As she worked on your hair and makeup, you managed to put in a few details about the dinner but were just as happy to let her gab. 

“It is,” Jonathan answers as he pulls out his wallet. “And a wedding right after. It will certainly be exciting.” 

“And you two... are the bells ringing for you soon?” She tinkles playfully and turns the pinpad to him. 

“Mm, well, that matter should always be a surprise, shouldn’t it?” He taps his card. “Thank you very much. You’ve done a masterful job.” 

“Thank you, sir,” she preens. “I hope you have a lovely dinner.” 

You smile and let Jonathan herd you away. He opens the door ahead of you and Marissa gives another swoony ‘aw’ as her coworkers whisper. You’re overwhelmed by all the attention, yet you’ve never had anyone jealous of you. It makes you feel special, albeit a bit guilty too. 

As Jonathan drives, you fidget nervously. You look at the time on the dash and chew your fingertip. He glances over. 

“Try not to mess your makeup, darling,” he girds. 

You rip your hand away and apologise. 

“You’re nervous?” He asks. 

“A little.” 

“Shouldn’t you be happy to see your family?” He wonders. 

“Umm, yes, but it’s just... a big event. Besides, it’s Geri’s dinner. I’ll just let her have her time,” you shrug and fold your hands in your lap. 

“Of course, but it won’t be too bad, will it? I’ll be there with you. I don’t mind if you hold my hand,” he reaches over and rests his knuckles on your leg. You twine your fingers through his. “I’ll need courage myself. Three sisters. Mother, father. I am outnumbered.” 

You squeeze his hand. You feel suddenly very selfish. He’s so cool and calm, you never once thought of how he might feel about it all. 

“It’ll be okay,” you say. 

“Yes, so long as we have each other, it will be,” he agrees. 

Back at his condo, you stand in indecision before the hangers. You’re not sure which dress to choose. You opt for the deep shade of midnight blue. Since it is an evening event, that would be more appropriate than the champagne. 

You step into the dress and pull the fluttery sleeves up over your shoulders. You reach back for the zipper but can’t quite reach. You spin in your struggle and as you face the door, you find Jonathan watching you with an amused slant in his lips. 

“Need help?” He prompts. 

You nod and give a bashful smile. You hold up the lacy bodice as he strides toward you. He wears a sleek pair of checkered grey slacks and a matching jacket, with a complementary tie with geometrics lines over a pressed white shirt. He is sophisticated and sauve and you still feel like that unwanted girl in her lonely apartment. 

You turn your back to him and he grabs the tab of the zipper. As he tugs it up slowly, his thumb tickles your spine. It sends a shiver through you. You spine to face him again. 

“Fawn, how do you only get more beautiful with each breath?” He says. 

“Oh,” you blush and sway. “Me? You look... great. Handsome.” You feel all mushy saying the words out loud.  

“Now, you are going to make me melt,” he purrs as he runs his hands up your sides. “Do you think we can cancel? Perhaps show up a bit late?” He winks and squeezes your hips. “That dress is doing something to me.” 

“Jonathan,” you smack his chest lightly. “No, my mother would kill me.” 

“Oh, Eugenia is a sweetheart,” he grins. “But I am a gentleman so I will have you there on time. So, let us not linger or my worst instinct may take over.” 

You shake your head, “just need to grab some shoes. Oh, and a purse.” You hang the other dress in the closet and spin around. You had a clutch... there. “Um, did you still have my phone? I can let my sister know we’re on the way.” 

“Hm, yes, but you shouldn’t need it with you. It is an event. We can’t be on our phones all night,” he chides. 

“No, I know, it’s just... I feel like I haven’t checked my emails in ages.” 

“Mm, alright,” he sweeps out of the room and you stand, a bit startled by the shift in his demeanour. You remind yourself that he might be anxious about all the new people. 

He returns and hands you your phone. You message Geri and your mother, just to be sure. You keep the cell in your hand and look at Jonathan. 

“I’ll put it to do not disturb,” you suggest. “Okay?” 

“Well, I suppose there may come an emergency,” he sighs. “I won’t argue. We haven’t time for it.” 

You flinch and tuck the phone into the clutch. You rub your lips together then stop yourself. You follow him from the room and stop to check your make up in the mirror hung in the hall. It’s still in tact. 

You step into your heels and bend to strap them on. Jonathan sidles around you, his keys jingling. Before you can stand, you squeal at the grope on your ass. You pop up and teeter on your shoes. 

“Jonathan!” You exclaim. 

“I’ve got to get it out of my system now,” he smirks. “Oh darling, I’m not sure I’ll make it through the night.” 

“If I have to, you have to,” you poke him. “Now please, no more. I can’t handle it.” 

“Oh, you cannot?” He chuckles and steps closer, drawing you flush to him as he scoops your ass in both his hands. “Not this?” 

“Jonathan,” you press your hands to his chest. “Please.” 

“Mmm, what if I was quick?” He purrs as he rocks you. 

“We have to go.” 

“I know, darling but I’m so very hungry,” he slathers down at your chest. “We can make an excuse. Traffic is absolutely terrible, isn’t it?” 

“Oh gosh,” you squeak and squirm, “I can’t--” 

“Oh, you don’t have to do anything, fawn,” he slides his hands down as he lowers himself to his knees. He tugs at your skirts as you cry out in shock. “I only want a taste... I’ll save dessert for after dinner.” 

He throws your skirt over his head and disappears beneath. He pulls your leg up and over his shoulder and you wave on one leg. He has you off-kilter as he nuzzles the front of your panties. He hums and it rolls through you.  

You grab onto the shape of his head through your dress and cling to him to keep from falling over. You couldn’t stop him if you tried. As all things with him, it’s easier to just let him do as he will. Besides, you are in no hurry to face your family. 

[its-a-hare-pom-pom]

Yk I really don’t like the fact that I found these trousers I really liked and went to try them on and they were too small, then I told my mum and we put them back. Then I went on Pinterest and the first ad I saw was a weight loss one. I am so ridiculously glad I’m confident in my body because it’s so easy to fall into that trap

[watsittoyah]

The Devils Playpen

A Obsessive!QIMIR X BLACK!FEMALE OC STAR WARS SMUT FIC

NEXT

This is complete fiction, I do not own any characters of the star wars franchise however I own all characters of my own creation, as well as plot.

That being said, the themes will be dark, Qimir will have obsessive and possessive qualities. This story will be borderline grey morals, there will be trigger warnings in the beginning of every chapter that will be gruesome/sexual.

You’ve been warned little flower if you’d like to continue, please read forward, if not put this work of fiction down and go read the holy word…welcome to the Devils playpen…

Chapter 1) When The Predator Becomes Prey…

(Song: Obsession By Exo)

Warning: Mentions of suicide. Stalking, choking of non sexual nature. Oral sex, shibari, threats of r*pe, Light Saber play (don’t be dumb you know what that last tag means)

I walk past a woman with long and short locks but she brings no excitement to my inner beast.

How lucky she is.

I hiss internally as I walk inside of the apothecary. Once I’m inside I inhale deeply, letting the poison I desire call to my senses.

However I smell something else. Something sweet? Sticky? I let my eyes fall onto a man hunched over in a corner. I don’t bother with manners of averting my eyes.

My curiosity has a scratch and I want it itched.

“Hello?” I call out to him in a soft voice. The man appears to be sleeping and I walk closer but keep my distance. His scent still smells sticky and sweet. Like those man eating plants over on Plexart.

“Hello, sir? I’m here to buy some supplies.” I say as I stare at his sleeping form. I flick an empty bottle over and it shatters causing him to finally stir from his slumber.

“Oh, sorry.” He stretches and does a big yawn before he looks over at me. When our eyes meet, he runs his fingers through his mop like hair and gives me a lazy smile. “Oh, hello. And you are?” He asks as he stands fully.

I take note that we have a significant size difference. He looks to be 5’11 while I stand at 5’4.

“I’m here to buy supplies, unless you aren’t the owner of this shop.” I ask in a gentle yet bored tone. He clears his throat and nods. “I am, I am. So what can I get for you? Ah, pick your poison.” He jokes. I however don’t laugh or crack a smile.

“I just needs a few things on this list. Whatever you don’t have, I’m sure I can find on my travels.” I hand him a piece of paper and our fingers brush against each other. He feels cold to the touch.

Interesting…

“Hm, this is quite the list. Might I ask what are all of these for?” He asks as he looks at me.

No, he’s studying me. Which makes my inner beast stir.

“Just some tools on helping me hunt. Nothing major. I don’t mean to be rude but I do need to be on my way.”

“Right, I will get on this for you now.” He starts on my list and I decide to look around and figure out if I’m going to kill him or let him live since he brings a spark of something out of me.

“Can I ask you a question?” The man asks, which causes me to give an internal sigh. “What is your question sir?”

“Qimir, you can call me Qimir. Anyways my question for you is, what methods do you take to hunt your prey?” This question peaks my interest because the way he says prey I think he knows I hunt a different kind of species.

“There’s many ways to do that. Poisons, bare hands, even a simple isolation tactic. But the best method…is simply a mental attack. That works on any kind of prey.” I say with a hint of a smile on my lips. I look up and see Qimir staring at my lips.

I bite my plump bottom lip, which makes his Adam’s apple bob in his throat as he swallows.

“Forgive me for prying, but the items on your list, they are interesting. Bunta Root? That grows-”

“In one specific place I know, but I figured this place would have it here..” I look away from him and glance out the window.

In a matter of days, I will be at her door and I’ll she can’t escape me. I can’t wait to see her eyes widen by surprise. She’ll think how did a beast like me, hunt her down to the very last of her days.

Will she beg for her life?

Will she plead that I do it quickly?

The possibilities will be endless when I finally get my hands on Zen.

Zen…

She was once a great ally to my people at least until she got them killed.

Genocide, her and those moral less Jedi committed genocide to my people and I need to make sure they pay. She’s the final one and I just know, she knows I’m coming for her. Especially when the word went around on how her partner’s body was discovered.

I’ll never forget how his eyes had ballooned in his skull after I cracked his head open. I can almost picture his head hitting the concrete over and over and over. His brain matter was all over my hands, staining my nails with his blood.

If I close my eyes tonight will his ghost haunt me?

Will his soul ask me why I took him from his lover so soon?

I blink and I’m no longer in that glorious gruesome memory.

I turn and Qimir is standing close to me, almost making me flinch. “Excuse you.” I snap at him. He looks me up and down and cocks his head to the side.

“I’m sorry, it’s just…you remind me of someone I once knew. The resemblance is just uncanny. You look…exactly like her.” He whispers softly as he takes in my entire appearance.

Instead of stepping back, his scent makes my stomach grumble which makes me flick my split tongue against my inner cheek.

“Trust me Qi, if you knew me…you wouldn’t be standing so close.” I say to him letting my split tongue slither past my full lips. I notice his eyes darken from my movement for a split second.

“Why is that? I find you quite the interesting creature.” He says as he reaches out to touch my coiled curl. I jerk my head back not from his attempt to touch me, but from his scent.

I want to split my jaw open and take a chunk out of him. His scent had changed somehow. He smells like spiced sweet fruit.

I see a smirk on his lips and I want to bite him. I want to bite his flesh and rip i-

“Excuse me?” We break eye contact and I see a woman, she looks exactly like the woman I had passed when I came in here but her hair…it’s short. And she smells… sour.

I grow bored with her and move away from Qimir. But as I move away he grabs my wrist. I look down at his hand and then at him. “Don’t go anywhere. I’d like to finish this.” He lets my hand go and he moved away from me swiftly.

I narrow my eyes at his back as he talks to the woman. As I glance at her with boredom I can smell that she’s anxious? Scared?

Oh, maybe I can have some fun with her after all.

As Qimir talks to her, which tells me something is going on, I run my hand along the counter and ‘accidentally’ bump into her, causing her things to clatter to the floor.

“Oh I’m so sorry, Miss. Do forgive me I am not myself.” We lock eyes and in that moment, she’s frozen in place. Her pupils dilate. I can hear her pulse quicken. “I..it’s okay.” She stutters as I hand her her things.

“You are so pretty.” I say as I take in her whole face. I see her blink a few times and I study her presence.

She’s nervous, hmm her body is smart to be nervous, but is her brain?

“Oh! I’m sorry, I give compliments before I even give my name. I’m Akasha. And you are?” I see the apple of her cheeks deepen in color after I compliment her.

“I’m-” She looks away from me and at Qimir but I clear my throat and she looks back at me, trapped in my spell. “I’m Osha.” She whispers with a small smile. “Such a pretty name. I don’t mean to over step, but would you like some company on your travels?” Before she answers me, Qimir clears his throat.

I cut my eyes at him and he’s staring at me, in a way that makes me want to challenge him. “I thought you wanted your things in a hurry, Akasha.” He says my name as if he’s accusing me of something .

“Suddenly I am in no rush, especially when it comes to making new friends.” I stand as well as Osha and I step towards her. Inhaling her fear.

Her scent is starting to ripen, oh I need to sink my teeth into her, before she spoils. Before she-

“Mae, if you don’t mind. I’m just handling this customer and then I can get back to you.”

Mae?

I look back at the woman and she looks down at her fingers, fidgeting with them.

“Okay, Qimir.” She says with hesitation in her voice. She looks at me and I wink at her. “So, pretty one, might I ask, what brings you to an apothecary?” I ask as I lean against the counter, looking her up and down.

I wonder how her teeth taste.

“I’m just here to thank Qimir for the item he gave me. It helped me greatly.” I listen to her pulse and it quickens.

Oh you little liar.

Now I’m excited to know why she’s lying so much.

“You’re welcome. I hope I can help anyway I can to help you please your Master.” Qimir says as I feel him behind me. I look back and he was leaning forward, playing with one of my curls.

How did I not notice him this close to me?

I flick my hair from his touch and he sniffs his finger tips.

Did he just sniff his fingers?

“Akasha, since you’re making friends, how about being my friend?” Qimir asks as he stares me deep into my eyes.

Hmmm…

“I like being friends with girls, Qimir. They’re are nice and sweet….” I look at his lips and I can imagine biting them.

“But with boys? I tend to be a bit too rough with them. And you?” I look him over his slim athletic build. “You look like you break easily.”

I see him lick his bottom lip and I swear I hear a slight groan in his throat. He then lowers his voice so only I can hear.

“You shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, Akasha. I tend to play rough with my things. Sometimes they break and sometimes they…turn to ash in my clutch.”

Excitement licks my veins as I inhale his scent.

Mmm it’s mixed with sweet, spice and arousal.

“Sounds like a threat, and a fun time. Maybe…” I lean in close to his ear, as he leans in to hear me. “…I can teach you how to play with your toys nicely by making you my new toy. Would you like that, Qi?” I flick my tongue against his ear and I hear a deep groan vibrate from his chest.

He’s about to answer me but Osha/Mae clears her throat and I feel both Qi and myself glare at her.

I look away and take a deep breath. “How about you talk to her and I’ll be back for my things. I have something to grab on that list that I know you don’t have here.” Before he can stop me I leave the shop and place my hood back upon my head.

••••

“I need Daroon moss for my special powder. Maybe if I’m lucky I can find some on the outer banks of this place.” I mutter as I continue to walk further into a crowd but my muscles tense as I feel I’m being followed.

Who would be stupid enough to follow me?

I decide to cut the chase short and duck further into the crowd.

They continue to follow me and that’s when I notice his scent.

The sweet spicy arousal.

I slip into an alleyway and I stand there counting as his scent get closer. That smell. If I were an addict, I would beg for a hit of that scent on a daily.

As soon as he is in arms reach I snatch him in close then push him to the ground. I then quickly take my boot and press it firmly against his throat.

“I don’t know about your other customers but I don’t like to be followed around stores or crowds.” I press down with a bit more pressure, just so he can answer me.

He winces in pain. “S….sorry. But I did…tell you I wanted…to finish this.” I go to step down harder but he grabs my ankle and twists, causing me to lose my footing.

He then pins me under him and I feel his full weight on top of me. “Get off of me.” I hiss. “Not until we finish this, conversation.”

“This conversation is over!“ I scream at him. He looks deep into my eyes and he gives me a wicked grin. “I’m sorry, but you seem to still think you have control of this situation. When clearly I’m the one on top. But I’ll be nice. The conversation will end after I tell you this…I’ve decided that I want you to be my new toy. And when I want something I take it.” I see a flash of something wild in his eyes as I feel his hands go for my throat.

His strength takes me by surprise as he starts cutting off my air supply. “Let…me…go!” I scream knowing it’ll cause at least someone to come find out why I’m screaming.

But…

No one comes.

Not even a curious onlooker.

He squeezes tighter and I try my best to fight him off. But it’s like an animal is wearing his skin and attacking me. I can feel him clearly aroused as he chokes me out on the ground.

Wait no, it can’t end this way.

I can’t die this way underneath this sick son of a bitch.

My vision starts to blacken around the corners. Qimir slowly starts to fog up into darkness, and just when I’m about to pass out, I hear him say these haunting words to me.

“You’re exactly what I’ve been looking for, Akasha, why would I ever let you go?”

•••••

I jerk awake and cough to clear my throat. I go to move except my body is tied up. But in a way that makes me look spread out like some attraction.

I glance around and see I’m somewhere unknown. And I’m completely naked. The panic starts to set in but it stops as soon as I smell his scent.

“QIMIR!” I scream his name as my eyes try to look for him. “I know you’re near! I can smell you! Show yourself!” I scream, in hopes that someone will hear me.

Someone did…

He did…

“I see you’re awake. Good.” Qimir says with a soft smile on his face. “What the fuck is going on! Where am I? Why and I here!” I shout at him, ignoring the cutting sensation from the ropes.

He pulls up a chair and sits down right in front of me. He stares at me as if I didn’t just ask him a barrage of questions. “You know you are a heavy sleeper. It was like I was dragging a dead body in here. Oh! This is my place by the way. It’s on a remote island so no one can disturb us.” He smiles big as if kidnapping me was something to be proud of.

“Why am I here?” I spat at him. Qimir looks at me as if I’m a piece of art to be gawked at. The way the ropes bite into my skin, I know they’ll leave marks and burns.

“Isn’t it obvious? You’re here because I want you here.” He brushes his thumb against his bottom lip and continues to stare…study me. I begin to feel uncomfortable under his gaze.

“Why am I tied up like this? I’m not some prized piece of meat!” He leans forward and strokes his hand against the fatty flesh of my thigh. “Because you look pretty….You are a female Venus Fly. Rare even when your people were alive and thriving. What was the ratio? For every fifteen boys, only three girls would be born. And I do like to collect rare things. But you? You, Akasha not only are you rare but you’re deadly. I have great use for you.”

I give him a bewildered look. “You’re fucking craz-” He gets up knocking the chair over and he had his hand gripping my jaw. “Don’t call me that, I’m not crazy. I see we have to start some lessons on teaching you how to have manners and respect for others.”

“GET OFF OF ME YOU BASTARD!” I scream at him, but all he does is smile. “You know now you’re screaming and yelling but soon you’ll worship me like a God. And I’ll be sure to reward you.” He takes his other hand and he trails his three fingers down my bare flesh, slowly getting closer to my exposed pussy.

“Stop.” I say as I feel him near my pubic hairs. “Do you know how much restraint I had to have, tying you up like this? The temptation I had to open this pretty little thing and slide anything it in just to watch your reaction?” He parts my wet lips and I feel my clit spasm.

“You wanted to sodomize me? You’re no better than-“ He makes me eat my words when he slides his middle finger inside of me while he uses his other two fingers to rub my lips.

My body responds to his touch which makes me angry. “S…stop.” I stutter to him. He leans in close to my ear. “Your lips are telling me to stop but these sets of lips seem to be telling me another story. As a matter of fact, how about her and I get better acquainted.”

Qimir slides his finger out of me and my pussy misses the violation. I see him get on his knees for me and he looks up at me, as if I’m a deity of some sort and he’s is there to worship.

I watch him lean in close to inhale my sex and I want to shrink back from him but in my attempts the ropes dig deeper into my skin.

“You smell so sweet, I wonder if the taste is the same.” He leans in and I feel his tongue flicking across my clit.

I clamp my lips shut to keep from moaning but he makes it a challenge as he grips my roped hips and buries his face deep into my pussy.

My eyes roll back as I feel his tongue twirl and flick across my clit. He presses his tongue flat against my pussy and my body tries to rock to find more friction.

“Careful, one false move and you could cause more rope burn, Akasha. But you like a little pain and pleasure don’t you?” Qimir asks as he opens my lips wider and slides his tongue deep inside of me.

This time I let the moan slip out. I feel him smiling against my sex and I don’t care. I need a release. I need to use his face.

“P…please.” I moan out as I look down at him, eating me out. He shakes his head and now he’s only using the tip of his tongue. “If…you…want something…then…say…Master.” He says lazily twirling his tongue.

“Please Master.” I whine. “I need to come.” He gives a deep guttural chuckle. “Look at you, moaning like a bitch in heat. I won’t forgive you for calling me crazy. But I’m not that cruel of a master.” He gives a hard suck to my clit causing me to groan and then he gets up off of his knees.

I was breathing heavy as I watch him grab something from his table.

A light saber.

My body tenses from the memories in my past of how much damage something like that can cause.

He lights it and the hue is blood red. He brings it close to me and I fight the urge to flinch. The heat from the saber could melt even the finest hairs on a person or animals skin.

“Don’t worry, my little flower. I’ll never use this part on you…just this part.” He turns the saber off and flips it so the handle it near me.

“Tell me, will you let me be your master? Will you let me teach you how to be the perfect predator?” As he asks me, I feel him rub the handle of the saber against my swollen clit and I shudder as I stupidly nod.

I don’t say a word from the fear and in his eyes I can tell he knows I’m afraid of the saber. “Akasha…you had a lot to say earlier. Why aren’t you being so colorful with your words now?” He slides the handle in slowly causing my eyes to roll back but my body stiffens again.

“Does this scare you? Does this give you pleasure?” He strokes the handle against my entrance and I let a nod go. “Pl-”

“Ah, what do you say?”

“Master…please. Don’t do that.” I moan out as he slides the handle in slowly. “Don’t do what? Slide the handle of my saber inside of the needy plump pussy? You don’t want me to make you feel good?” He whispers against my ear as his hand finds my throat.

The fear I have gets clouded when starts to slowly fuck me with the saber. I feel the build up in my lower stomach as I moan.

“See? Your body likes to feel good. It likes when I do this, but imagine how it’s going to feel when I use the real thing. When my cock is penetrating deep into your walls.”

He goes faster and my moans become more lose my from lips. My thighs burn from the rope and from the tension I have in them.

You can hear the wet noises coming from my soaking wet slit and I don’t care. I want a release.

“You’re taking it so well, my little flower. I bet you want to come don’t you?” I nod quickly as he slows down the pace. I try to buck my hips but I can’t from my restricting position. He raises a brow at me then. “Yes! Yes I do Master. Please!” I beg and plead.

He loosens his grip on my throat and he fucks me harder with the saber making my climax about to hit the tipping point.

“I’m gonna come.” I breathe out as I feel the anticipated tingle. But he stops, he yanks the saber out and tosses it across the room and I give out a shriek of frustration.

“Now would a crazy person deny a creature such as yourself the pleasure of coming? Don’t answer that, you might tell me the wrong answer and piss me off-” He grabs me by my tangled curls and yanks my head back, causing the rope around my shoulders and shoulder blades to tighten.

“You belong to me now, Akasha. Your pleasure, your pain, your very existence is mine. And when I see fit to let you come, it will be on my cock, my mouth, or my fingers. Do you understand? You can speak.” He orders as he looks me in my eyes.

“Yes.” I say through clenched teeth. “Yes what?” He asks with a raised brow. “Yes master…”

“Good girl.” He lets me go and kisses my temple. “Get some rest, we have some training to do tomorrow.” He lets me go and simply walks away, leaving me strung up like some prize that’s been won.

The very second I get the chance, I’m going to kill Qimir. I should’ve known that his scent would lead me to the devils playpen…

[myownwholewildworld]

wherever you go (a joel miller’s ff) - chapter 9

chapter 8 | series masterlist | main masterlist | chapter 10

pairing: outbreak!2003!joel x f!reader. (it's actually 2004 now)

summary: "only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love" ― george elio.

a/n: uhmmmm... yeah... i did tell you guys i love drama, right? well, this chapter has a dangerous amount of angst. i'm sorry?? i really hope you guys like this one, i have put a lot of effort into it 😭 as always, all interactions welcome. thank you all for reading and generally being amazing! xx

warnings: 18+, mdni. angst, angst, ANGST. have i said angst already? discussions of death, suicide and assisted suicide. sarah makes an appearance. soft!joel. lovemaking. there are some "i love you"s thrown around. crying. smut. oral (m and f receiving). masturbation (m and f). creampie. goodbye sex?? if that's even a thing to tag. reader is female, no other description given. reader is mid-late 20s, joel is 37. no use of y/n.  joel’s and reader’s pov.

w/c: ~5.3k.

tags aka the drama wagon (let me know if you want to be added/removed from the list pls!): @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @pedrospurplerain @missladym1981

@fancyyoouu @smolbeanzzz @guelyury @bishtrouille

“Joel, please, I beg you. Don’t do this, please”, Sasha pleaded with him.

She was on her knees, imploring him to spare her life. But he couldn’t do that. She was infected ― she was wearing the proof on her forearm, the bite bleeding shades of red and yellow.

It was just a matter of time before she lost herself, before she was truly gone. He was just being merciful with her, he thought. Ending Sasha’s suffering before it became too great to bear was the right thing to do. She was dead anyway, speeding up the process was lenient of him.

He gripped the gun tighter, his index caressing the trigger. If it was so rightful, why was he hesitating? The barrel kissed her forehead as she shut her eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks, mouthing a silent prayer. Joel noticed a familiar scar on her right cheek ― it had almost faded, but he knew it all too well. He had stroked it many times in the last few months.

His brows furrowed in confusion. Why did Sasha have the same scar you did?

“Daddy? Don’t kill her, please”, Sarah’s voice rang in his ears.

Joel’s attention quickly turned to his daughter. Sarah materialised, standing right there in front of him at arm’s length. She felt so real to him, he thought himself mad. Her bright sad eyes pierced through his resolution. She was as beautiful as he remembered ― curly brown hair, big green orbs, a sweet soft smile, the most soothing voice known to man, to a father.

But her features were torn with sorrow. In fact, her eyes were dotted with thick tears, her lips pursed in a grimace. He felt the urgent need to calm her down, to tell her everything was going to be alright. This time he could protect her. He would. He had to.

Joel knew he would not survive this all over again. It would break him for good, shattering the last remnants of what made him human.

“I have to, baby girl. I need to keep you safe”, his voice faltered, filled with emotion. A knot in his throat so dense he could not even swallow. “I won’t lose you again, baby girl, I can’t.”

“Daddy, no!”, she cried, touching his forearm ― a light, comforting pat that made his skin crawl with nostalgia.

The lump in his throat spread to his chest. An overwhelming sensation threatened to rip his torso apart. Oh, how much did he just want to embrace his Sarah tight, to feel her warmth again, to know such unconditional love one more time. To cry with pure relief, letting go of that daunting feeling that had been haunting him for over a year.

Joel knew he would do anything to protect Sarah. And so he did.

A loud bang ricocheted, his eyes never leaving his daughter’s.

“No, daddy, what have you done?”, she muttered, holding onto his forearm, digging her little fingers in his flesh.

She was weeping uncontrollably now. Joel dropped the gun to the floor, cradling Sarah’s face between his murderous hands. He swept away her tears, and his heart ached with longing.

“What I had to, baby girl. I’m keeping you alive, no matter what the cost”, Joel’s voice was so low, it was almost a whisper.

For the first time in four hundred and fifty-one days, he allowed himself to cry his eyes out. He let go of all the bottled-up emotions, knocking down the walls that contained all the misery and despair that he had felt for so long.

Sarah’s hands wrapped around his wrists, her sobs and his flowing in unison.

“But you’ve killed her, daddy.”

And then she vanished, leaving a trail of warmth on Joel’s fingertips. She was gone.

His heart jolted against his ribcage. Darkness engulfing his senses once again, casting away any feelings he had, leaving him as empty as he ever was.

He composed himself ― something in her tone, in her emphasis in the word “her”, forced Joel to look away from where his daughter had stood a minute before, down to the woman on the ground.

But it wasn’t Sasha. It was you.

You were dead. Because of him.

Grief swallowed him whole. Chewed him, spat him.

Joel startled awake, his heart racing so fast he could feel it pressing against his throat. Panic strangled him, forcing him to swallow the hard lump in his throat. He blinked rapidly, realising he had been crying in his sleep. With one hand, he brushed away the tears as reality set in once again.

He was going to lose you and there was absolutely nothing he could do to prevent it from happening. Your fate had been unfairly sealed. The future he thought he had with you… gone. Joel had allowed himself to dream, dooming you in the process of doing so. He should have known by now that happiness was meant to escape him forever. Joel tainted everything and everyone he touched, leaving a trail of lingering darkness that would eventually catch up with those he marked.

He looked around, for a second forgetting where he was. You both were in a flat on the second floor of an apartment building on East Lake Shore Drive, with views to Lake Michigan. He guessed it was around midnight, a couple of hours after the whole debacle.

Joel barely remembered how you both got here, his memory was hazy, unable to recall much after seeing the bite mark on your wrist. The part of him who was built for this world ―unattached, steadfast, unwavering― took over, guiding you both to safety.

It was weird how he used to space out in those moments of high anxiety. It wasn’t the first time it had happened. He barely remembered the days after Sarah’s death either. The brain fog was so dense it felt like swimming through murky waters.

He shook his head and glanced down. Sitting on the couch, you were laying down on your side, with your head on his lap. Your hands were tucked away under his thigh, your face almost completely leaned against his jeans. One of his hands was buried in your hair ― he massaged your scalp lightly, his other hand resting on your hip.

Joel just wished he could take all of it away. Had he never known you, you would not be in this position. If your paths had never crossed, he was convinced you would have lived a full, happy life. And, as always, he fucking ruined it. Ruined you.

As if his conscience was not tortured enough, little Ava popped in his mind. Another failure, a very grave one. The little girl had unearthed a side of him he thought dead: the longing father.

The one who would worry to death every time Sarah fell to her knees while learning to walk.

The one who felt extremely proud when she took her first steps unaided.

The one whose heart would flutter with anxiety on her first day of school.

The one who spent hours deciding what to get his baby girl for Christmas.

The one who tried baking a cake for her fifth birthday.

The one who trained with her for her first soccer match.

The one who cheered at the top of his lungs every time his baby girl would score a goal.

The one who couldn’t protect her.

The one who hugged her desperately while she took her last breath.

This felt like a second punishment. Joel shouldn’t have had let go of Ava, but what was he supposed to do? Watch you fall in a river full of furious clickers? He couldn’t. He had to choose and chose you. It was fucking wrong, he knew that ― he was so selfish he condemned an innocent toddler without giving her a second thought. Losing you ― this was karma. A twisted payback endorsed by the universe.

You had cried yourself to sleep, caving in to the irrevocable fate that awaited you. Your dreams were besmirched with haziness ― a whirlwind of clickers, people running directionless, Joyce and Ava falling to their demises, death everywhere.

Your heart wept at the memory. Joyce’s blank eyes haunted your dreams, as well as Ava’s small voice, begging her nana to come back from the dead. Life was so unfair you could not wrap your head around it. They were innocent. Joyce was the type of person who would give her everything for everyone ― so thoughtful, attentive, always willing to lend a hand or an ear. She had been a light for you, healing that part of your heart that missed your parents. How much you had wished that your sacrifice would have had worked out. To trade your life for hers. Joyce should be eternal.

And then little Ava… you felt agony just thinking about her reaching out to the darkness below. Her imploring her nana to get back to her, to hold her. Her life cut so short ― it was too cruel.

You had lost too much, too soon, too fast.

When you woke up, your emotions were weirdly in check. Defeated, you understood there was nothing you could do. About Joyce, about Ava, about yourself. The dice had been cast and nothing could change the end result. So you had to accept your destiny and make the most of what little time you had left with Joel.

You momentarily shut your eyes, feeling Joel’s fingertips rubbing your scalp. Swiping your tears, you turned your head ninety degrees to your left, looking up at Joel. He was blankly staring into the distance, lost in his own train of thought. He reminded you of when you two first met and that scared you. You didn’t need to read minds to know what was crossing his.

The worst part about dying was not death itself, but the devastation it left on its wakening. Those left behind had to deal with the drowning grief of losing a loved one ― the sorrow, the regrets, the lost opportunities, the what if’s.

You grabbed his hand to kiss his knuckles. His eyes slowly drifted down to you, stained with affliction and unspent tears. His thumb ghosted your lips, a caress that tugged at your heart. He bowed down to replace his thumb with his mouth, a light peck that tasted of goodbye.

You stroked his jaw when the kiss broke off and reluctantly sat up on the sofa, nestling against his side. He wrapped you with his arm, holding you tight, his chin resting on your crown. Your hand was placed on his chest ― his heart beating steadily, calming your inner panic.

You closed your eyes. You didn’t want to do this, but you were scared out of your mind. You had trusted Joel with your life, so you would trust him with your death too. It was so fucking selfish of you, it made you sick. You had seen what a prolonged death did to people and didn’t want to suffer the same fate. Withering away like a flame on a thunderstorm was not something you wanted to experience. You wanted it to be quick, painless.

You knew it would break him and you hated yourself for it. But fear, as overwhelming as it was, had a tight grip on your ability to think clearly.

“Joel”, you whispered, rubbing his chest. You didn’t dare to glance up, your eyes fixed somewhere in that tiny living room. “Please don’t hate me, but… when my death is near, would you… could you… please… just… put an end to it? To me?”, you wept, tears flowing again. “I know it’s cruel of me to ask this of you, but please understand… I don’t wanna come back as one of those things, I don’t wanna hurt you. Or anyone. I just want to rest knowing I didn’t cause any harm…”

You felt his heart picking up a wild pace under your fingertips. A very long silence ensued, which forced you to look up at him. His jaw was so clenched you could see the muscles straining.

Joel was making a titanic effort to keep his emotions at bay. A world of past demons, of rotten feelings and of secret tears overran his mind. Facing his own death was easier than accepting yours. How could he be a victim of fate, a witness to death and the executioner of it as well? He couldn’t, he didn’t have that many faces ― he just was a simple man whose life got complicated too easy, too fast.

As intricate as his thoughts were, as many atrocities as he had committed in the last year to keep you safe, he detested being the ghoul to those he treasured. You had asked him to be the worst version of himself ― one he did not know if he would ever come back from. Once the afterlife sullied his soul, Joel would lack the strength to wash it off himself. It would forever taint him, marking him as the grim reaper’s lackey.

But what was one more death on his conscience? Your death? He had already branded you for slaughter the moment he landed his eyes on you many moons ago. It was only fair you solicited he finished what he had started, after all.

Ending your suffering before it became too great to bear was the right thing to do.

You were dead anyway, speeding up the process was lenient of him.

If it was so rightful, why was he hesitating?

The irony of his dream would have struck him to his knees had he been standing. If he loved, really loved you, he would not vacillate. He would greet your death compliantly, certain his would quickly follow.

You were a fucking monster for asking that to the man you loved, for laying such a burden on him. How could you be so damn tactless? You knew how he thought of himself, how he believed he spoiled everything he touched. And here you were, reinforcing that idea for him.

Your sobs grew louder, your hand travelling from his chest to his jawline as you straightened your back to reach his cheek so his vacant eyes would meet yours.

“I’m truly sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I don’t know what overcame me, I just… I’m scared”, you muttered through trembling lips. “I’ll do it myself. Please, forget what I said, I didn’t mean to. I’m really sorry, Joel.”

Joel finally blinked, coming out of his trance. He cupped your chin, fear and grief swirling in his irises. He tilted his head down to place a kiss on your forehead.

“I’ll do it, sweetheart. I’ll do it”, he whispered breathlessly, and you just shattered in his arms.

You embraced him and cried until your eyes stung and ran dry ― until you flushed out such dreadful feelings from your system. Joel held you throughout, stoic and unfaltering, brushing your forehead with his mouth from time to time, whispering reassuring words in your ear.

You had noticed the difference in his voice, as if your request wholly broke him. How you wished you could retract yourself, travel back in time to restore the trust you thought you fractured. “No, I will. I will”, you repeated, inflicting your words with determination, one you didn’t feel.

This wasn’t how you wanted to spend your last hours on earth, lamenting yourself, wasting the little time you had left. This wasn’t you. You needed to show him you loved him, make him forget your sickening petition. A thought formed: you never replied to his confession ― a wrong you could right before you lost your mind to cordyceps.

You stirred in place to uncoil your back, your lips lined up with his. “I love you, Joel Miller. Since the moment I met you, I knew you were the one”, you mumbled with a sad smile before closing off the distance, your mouths crashing in desperate need.

Feeling his hesitance, you insisted with your tongue, stroking his with long brushes until Joel relaxed into your mouth. His hand slipped under your t-shirt, caressing your back, drawing invisible lines on your skin with the light touch of his fingertips.

“I heard you the other night, I thought I dreamt it”, he admitted in a hush when your lips detached.

“The other night, you mean yesterday?”, you teased with a small grin, and he nodded in reply. It did seem like an eternity away. “You didn’t dream it, I said it. I’ve been wanting to say it out loud for a while.”

“Me too, been thinking it for a bit, but didn’t know when it was the right moment, if there was a right moment. And then it felt like that moment was gone, that I was too late”, his tone became sombre as he spoke, your heart shuddering and breaking and healing and crying.

“You didn’t need to say it ― I knew, believe me, I really knew. I’ve known for so long now, before you even realised. I only wanted you to say it when you were ready”, you reassured him, your noses nuzzling.

It was a very little consolation, but you both held onto it.

This time it was Joel who resumed the kiss ― his lips were softer than usual, his mouth more begging than dominating. The caress of his tongue was affectionate, not demanding. You slid your feet from underneath and climbed on top of him, straddling him. You sat on his lap and peppered his jaw with little pecks. He hugged you by your waist, bringing you closer to him. You softly moaned when he trapped your mouth with his again, your crotch flush with his groin. You involuntarily rolled your hips against his, friction awakening your desire.

“I want you to make me feel alive one last time, Joel”, you sighed against the corner of his mouth, your palms against his cheeks.

He stopped and looked at you for a long second, probably debating himself. But whatever doubts crossed his minds, he put them to rest. Sometimes you wished you were a telepath ― Joel was a man of few spoken words, but you knew his inner talk was loud and loquacious.

With his forearms, he pressed your thighs around his waist. Placing his hands on your butt cheeks, he stood up with you in his arms, holding you tight against his body. Joel walked you both to what you assumed was the bedroom. It was quite minimalistic, white walls and spiderwebs decorating the corners. The bed seemed comfy with a very thick mattress and silky bedsheets.

He set you down on the bed before kneeling to undo the laces of his boots, throwing them to a side. Your shoes quickly followed his to the same corner. Joel stood back up and undid his belt, his eyes never leaving yours as you helped him. The unspoken words were loud in your head, neither of you needed to say anything else.

In silence, he undressed, leaving a pile of clothing on the floor. You admired his body ― his broad shoulders, his strong arms, his chiselled pecs, his slimmer waist and softer tummy. You traced the scar on his right hip, the one he got for defending Tommy. Ah, Tommy, another loss. You casted that thought away quickly.

He was gorgeous and he was yours. All yours. You loved this man with such passion, it sometimes startled you. The way he cared for you in all meanings of the word warmed your heart.

You caressed his sides, your fingers wandering to his ass cheeks to push him towards you. You kissed his belly button, his happy trail inviting you down, which you gladly followed. His erection was creeping up but was still soft, so you kneaded his testicles tenderly ― your free hand pumping him unhurriedly, teasing him, while your lips brushed his V line.

You looked up at him with adoring eyes before your tongue rippled around the plump tip. Slurping the precum off his slit without breaking visual contact, Joel tucked your hair away behind your ears and let you do as you pleased at your own pace. Closing your eyes, you took his manhood in your mouth, slathering your saliva on him. His cock was hungering for your touch, weeping, throbbing ― you could feel the heat hardening him under your tender hands and darting tongue. He tasted musky, but also sweet. Your favourite flavour. You heard a deep rumble coming from Joel’s chest as his glans caressed your uvula.

You took him out of your mouth when you felt the pulsation ― he was ready for you, whenever you wanted to take him in in your slick warmth. You slid your tongue across his whole length before leaning backwards to meet his eyes.

You saw lust, but also raw love. Joel motioned his hand in an upward gesture, and you stood up in front of him. Tasting himself in your mouth, he helped you undress completely. When you were both bare naked, Joel hugged you tightly. Oh, how you wished you could stay like that forever, frozen in time.

Joel gently pushed you to bed again, his lips never abandoning yours, and dug a knee on the mattress as you laid down on your back. His body was hovering over yours, his frame covering you.

He showered your neck with pecks and licks while your dewy lashes fluttered like butterflies. A soft, liquid whimper grew in your chest, breaking free. His calloused fingers cupped your breasts, his thumbs ghosting your nipples ― a light touch, electricity thundering down your spine. Your back arched, lifting off the mattress when his thick fingers were replaced with the welcomed wetness of his mouth. He did not linger for long though, set on a downward path.

Joel came off the bed, dragging your hips with him to the edge of the mattress. Knelt before you, you unconsciously parted your legs to make room for him. He marvelled at the sight, the proof of your passion pearling your velvety fold, the core of your pleasure begging to be paid due attention.

With the back of your knees resting on his shoulders, he kissed your mound while his thumb caressed your dripping entrance, circling it tentatively before drowning in it. You gasped at the sweet intrusion. Then his tongue scurried down, licking your clit with a languid, long stroke.

He lapped your creamy slit, gulping your fluids down ― everything you had to offer, he took. His tongue worshipped every crevice in your silky pussy, not even an inch was left unattended ― Joel made sure of it. He alternated between fingering you slowly with his thumb and introducing his tongue in your tight opening, stroking your g-spot the way you liked it. It was too much. The tense knot in your belly melted with no warning, releasing a spurt of lava into Joel’s mouth. You wailed, clutching the bedsheets, gushing for him, only for him, eyes averted.

Like a thirsty man in the middle of the desert looking for an oasis he could drink of, Joel made you come with his tongue over and over again. You lost count of how many times you orgasmed ― your skin pearly with sweat, your cunt overstimulated, your dusky nipples hardened, your limbs shaking, your heart burst with love.

Joel emerged from in between your legs and crawled on top of you as he dragged you to the centre of the king size bed. Holding his weight off you on his elbows, he blanketed your body with his ― his hardness intimately resting against your swollen mound. You slipped a hand between your bodies, your fingertips teasing the head of his column. You pumped him slowly as his mouth invaded yours with lazy strokes.

You bathed his cock in your slick, swiping it on your puffy lips ― drenching him in your arousal. Then you wielded him from the base and broke off the kiss. You wanted to look into his eyes as he possessed you one last time. As he loved you and you loved him back with your whole heart. Guiding his tip to your needy hole, you encouraged him to push it in with your heels on his butt cheeks, never breaking eye contact.

Both of you moaned as his cock found its way to your cervix, kissing it gently. You draped your legs around his waist, taking him in as far as you could house him. The connection you felt to him was eerie, almost unreal. His orbs were transfixed on yours, none of you able to look away. Your mouths were parted in unspoken awe, then he lightly bit your chin to stop himself from groaning like a madman.

You laced his neck with your arms to pull him towards you, your lips crashing as he rolled his hips into you. In, out, in, out ― very slowly, so slowly it just enhanced the intensity of his swaying.

“I love you, Joel”, you husked as his cock dragged along your anterior wall, pulling out to then ripple back into you.

Joel’s thrusts were lethargic, as if he didn’t want the moment to end. “I love you too”, he replied as his hips undulated like waves between your thighs.

Joel kissed the scar on your cheek as you foraged for his mouth. The façades had fallen. There was no roleplay, no dominance nor submission, no “sirs”, no dirty talk, no begging ― none of that. There was only two people showing their love and affection to each other. It was the first time you actually made love.

Because you were head over heels for him. Had been for a long while. And you just knew he loved you to bits, there was no denying that. The overwhelming sensation flooded you, tears welling up and shedding. You cradled his face and realised the apples of his cheeks were soddened too. Both of you were crying your love and your regrets ― your tears mixing with his, wetting your lips with a salty taste that got diluted in the shared dampness of your mouths.

Your heart wept for the time you didn’t have with each other. You hugged him closer to your chest, nipples kissing, when the soft hammering of his pelvis against yours picked up a faster but controlled, smooth pace. Way more intense too, his pulsing cock driving in as far as it could reach.

One of Joel’s tears fell on your neck when he kissed your chin, then slid down and gathered at the centre of your collarbone. His mouth dropped to lick it off your skin, leaving a different type of wet trail behind. You whimpered heavily, his tongue now attending the crook of your neck while Joel’s hand darted down, quickly finding your buttery button and stroking it dextrously.

Your moans grew louder ― your legs gripping tighter around his waist, your nails digging in the skin of his back, your back arching, your mouth open so wide it was an inch away from dislocating.

Joel didn’t contain his passion either, heaving notoriously, his chest rumbling with a deep, guttural growl. His dick was diving in you so smoothly, it even felt mythical. He was throbbing for you, your creaminess cloaking his manhood. He could feel your heartbeat contracting your inner walls every single time, his own pulse drumming in his cock at the same time. Your pulsating sexes were fully synchronised, in complete harmony.

You yielded first. Your overstimulated clit sent the signal across your whole body, a potent wave uprooting a high-pitched shriek off your lungs as you reached the best climax of your life. Your quivering cunt clamped down around Joel’s hot cock, squeezing him uncontrollably ― you could not get hold of your own muscles, they just spasmed around his pounding dick. You felt his manhood twitch violently inside you, announcing his own orgasm ― your pussy heartening his cock to come.

Joel felt his balls tense up, his lower belly contracting so hard it was painful. He was so turned on, a prolonged howl escaped his mouth, cavernous and thundering. His dick writhed in your welcoming hole, his hips stuttering with measured effort. He placed the palms of his hands to each side of your head to lift his torso off you, his hips still waving against yours, and caught a glimpse of your heavenly face: half-lidded teary eyes, O-shaped mouth, your eyebrows relaxed. You looked so damn beautiful, the most beautiful he had ever seen you, so much so his heart tugged with longing, with love, with adoration.

With a painful groan and out of habit, he tried to pull his cock out of you to come outside. But you quickly shook your head no, raising your arms to lace your hands behind his neck, forcing his head down towards you. The heels of your feet pressed against his butt cheeks again, your legs locking around his waist to keep him in the place he needed to be ― inside you.

“Please, Joel, I want to feel you, I need to feel you”, you urged him, his breath mixing with yours, mouths agape.

With such plea, Joel finally let go at the same time he claimed your lips with his, moaning into your mouth. Devouring you, his cum spurted out into your inviting, slick cave, in several waves. He filled you up to the brim, his cock still throbbing, painting your inner walls white. He remained still between your legs, his dick slowly softening inside you, until he finally pulled out, both of you grunting.

You squashed your cunt to keep his warm spent in your pussy for as long as you could.

Joel kissed your cheeks, sweeping away your tears with his lips while your hands cradled his face, your thumbs brushing his away too. You had never seen him cry before. It killed you knowing that he felt so safe with you, he could let his walls down and be himself without any repercussions. His teary brown eyes pulled yours into their orbits ― you were unable to look away.

Joel closed the distance and sweetly kissed you. Again, that heavy, goodbye feeling nested in your chest, squeezing your heart and your throat.

This was goodbye. You would never see him again and that broke your heart into tiny little pieces that could not be glued back together.

Don’t think about it.

Joel laid on his back and you quickly curled up against his chest, hiding your face from him. Silence ensued, each lost in their own thoughts. You pecked his chest while your fingertips lightly traced every line on his tummy.

“Promise me you won’t do anything rash, please. Go look for Tommy after… after I’m gone. Please don’t even consider… following me.” You whispered, slowly looking up at him. “Please.”

His eyes wandered on your face, then he sighed heavily, looking away. “I can’t promise you that, sweetheart.” His orbs slowly locked on yours again, your bottom lip quivering with sadness. “I may or may not consider it, but Death is capricious and, sooner or later, it always comes knocking.”

“I hope it’s later rather than sooner. You deserve happiness, Joel.” Your words, albeit stammering, were sincere.

“This is my happiness, right here with you in my arms. If Death came looking for me tomorrow, I would die a happy man”, he admitted in a whisper.

Your heart exploded at his confession. You laughed and cried at the same time, kissing his jawline. “You do know how to make a girl feel special.”

“That’s because you are.” He shrugged, hugging you closer to his chest.

“I love you ― to the edge of the atlas and back.” Your hand caressed his left cheek, bowing his head towards you so you could capture his mouth.

You made love twice more that night, none of you wanting to fall asleep. You made sure every minute counted, showing and telling each other how much you loved one another.

You also cried together to purge your sorrows. When you thought no more tears could be shed, one of you would prove yourselves wrong, breaking another invisible dam. You both felt vulnerable, but also loved.

Soon enough, dawning colours painted the sky ― shades of red and orange filtering through the curtains, tinting the white walls of the bedroom with warmth.

You sighed, resting your cheek against his pec, feeling heavy and cold. Very cold. Suddenly, you shivered. Joel noticed your trembling, instantly worried. He pressed the palm of his hand against your forehead.

“Honey, you’re burning up.” His voice seemed to be far away.

You felt so drowsy you only managed to hum, “Mhmm?”.

Then you blindly plunged into darkness, unaware of Joel calling your name, panic in his voice.

[carlos-in-glasses]

Where All This Love Comes From

I'm so excited to share what has been known as Flashback Fic! 107k words, with all 14 chapters here on Ao3, rated E.

Six months after Gabriel Reyes’ death, TK grows concerned about Carlos’ drinking and brings him to a meeting at the Y. Afterwards, over omelets at the diner, the husbands open up to each other. TK reflects on meeting Carlos after years of addiction and self-destruction, while Carlos has continued to seek closure by uncovering two unknowns: The identity of his father’s killer, and how his father truly felt about Carlos as his son.

************************************************

Carlos puts his arms around him from behind and holds him still, kissing his neck. TK tries to twist in Carlos’ grip, but he won’t let him. He starts walking him towards the bedroom. “I’m desperate for you,” TK says, his blood hot, cheeks red, eyes pricking with tears. “I know.” “Make me forget everything.” “I will.” “I only want to think about you.” “You will.” Carlos stops for a breath. He smells TK – his clean hair, his evanesced cologne, his natural man scent, his salty tears that have imbued his skin, the sweat of stress. Sad, but still beautiful to Carlos. TK, delicious. “I never thought I’d have you. I never thought–” he can’t speak anymore.

***********************************************

Chapter 1: A Trail to Follow

In 2023, TK discovers something that triggers memories of heroin withdrawal seven years before – and Carlos makes amends with Gutiérrez after accusing him of his father’s murder.

Chapter 2: A Very Nice Sweater for the 'Y'

TK takes Carlos to the N.A. meeting – but when things don’t go as hoped, he instigates another method to get Carlos talking.  

Chapter 3: Snowballing

A messy situation in 2010 causes TK as a high school junior to lash out. In 2023, Carlos realizes it's time to tell TK about one more secret. 

Chapter 4: Original Sin

In 2013, Carlos accidentally destroys Gabriel’s oldest friendship. Nine years later, he attempts to make peace after he and TK get engaged.

Chapter 5: Between Two Bridges

In 2022, a grieving and struggling TK is compelled to talk to Owen about his 2020 overdose, which leads him to remember when his addiction nearly killed him years before. In 2023, TK asks Carlos about his history with alcohol. (Note: Chapter features TK using and gets fairly graphic)

Chapter 6: One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor

TK and Carlos compare notes on when they first came out – with Carlos spiraling in 2011 after an unexpected outburst, while TK in 2008 is embraced (and embarrassed) by his parents. In 2021, both handle the raw days of their breakup differently too.

Chapter 7: A Boy's Best Friend

In 2009, Gabriel attempts to connect with his increasingly distant and unhappy teenage son. In 2013, the fallout of Carlos leaving Iris has begun, and he knows his relationship with his parents will never be the same. In 2023, TK tries to talk to Gabriel about the bombshell revelation that Carlos doesn’t want kids.

Chapter 8: Your Heart, As If It Was My Very Own

In 2011, TK is left bewildered after he loses his virginity. Years later, with Carlos, TK's mind (among other things) is blown in a whole new way. In 2022, TK has an important conversation with a certain visitor when he wakes from his coma.

Chapter 9: Coffee with Gutiérrez

In September 2023, Carlos seeks an important but painful truth from Gutiérrez, and finds an unexpected ally within the 126. Two months later in Blue Moon Diner, TK gets ready to tell Carlos more about his past in New York.

Chapter 10: The Day Begins Like Any Other

In 2016, after TK experiences an assault and sees an old friend again under devastating circumstances, he makes a life-altering decision when his dealer suggests he try something new. In 2009, TK is attacked at school. (Note: Please heed the tags and the chapter note. Reader discretion advised. Look after your hearts).

Chapter 11: Lonely as a Sparrow in the Rain

When Carlos confesses to TK about where he went with Judd back in September – and why – TK has to tell Carlos something he won't want to hear. In 2014, a rift develops when Carlos shows off his new Camaro to his parents.

Chapter 12: Happy For You, Son

Before moving to Austin, TK falls out with his parents over his relationship with Alex. In December 2020, it's a different story as Carlos hosts Owen and Gwyn for TK's birthday meal. In 2012, Carlos has some unexpected news for his own parents, but Michelle tries to intervene. When TK and Carlos get engaged a decade later, Gabriel has something to say about it.

Chapter 13: The Risk of Love

In May 2023, Owen and TK save a spiraling Carlos from making the biggest mistake of his life when he thinks he’s found his father’s killer. In 2020, TK and Carlos become boyfriends beneath a sky full of aurora borealis.

Chapter 14: A Night Worth Celebrating

On a rainy night in 2020, TK and Carlos meet for the first time. In 2023, weeks after their big talk at Blue Moon, TK celebrates his thirtieth birthday with his husband, their family and their friends by his side – and Carlos is a little bit better at sharing his secrets.

Read on A03

[eeunoia]

ENHYPEN Series

sinag | psh.

chapter twelve

pairings: park sunghoon x reader

synopsis: waiting for a great plot twist in your life, the ruthless and powerful mafia boss park sunghoon forced his way in to it.

word count: 4k

warnings: contains harrassment, violence, guns, killings, abuse, obsessive love & other stuff. if you can't take this stuff, feel free to scroll away. let me know if i missed some. (please be responsible and avoid fics that contains warnings that can trigger you.)

note: reblogs and replies are highly encouraged. i truly appreciate your messages to me. it keeps me going. please leave comments and tags when you reblog! thank you so much, stay safe and ily!

eeunoia 2024 © all rights reserved.

“Thank you.” you smiled gently at the cabin crew once she placed your tea in front of you. She flashed back this kind smile before she puts Sunghoon’s whiskey in front of him.

Your eyes trailed from the whiskey then to the man staring right at you. It almost made you gagged when you met his piercing gaze. Your stomach churns, feeling slightly on edge.

“You didn’t even say thank you.”

Sunghoon was amused. That in the middle of this situation, you still have the time to call him out because he didn’t said thank you to the cabin crew. He couldn’t help but to wonder how innocent and pure you are.

“She’s working for me. It's just right for her to do that, she’s just doing what I paid her to do.” the words coming out from his mouth almost made your ears bleed. It was unbelievable for you.

You know he isn’t nice, but he still just proves you he can be even much worst.

“Once we arrive, you will live in my mansion.” he then continued.

Your brows furrowed hardly and you carefully settle your cup down, making sure it won’t break or anything. The news just shocked you to the bone.

“Pardon?” you faked a chuckle. “You’re joking, right?”

He took a sip from his liqour and shows no reaction to his face. “Tell me, Aelia...” he says in a very husky tone.

He bat his eyes slowly while keeping his stares right at you.

“Do I look like I’m joking to you?” his placid expression and dark eyes sure tells you that he’s dead serious.

“B-But I can’t! I have a family, my parents will worry about me,” a joke. It was a big joke, you are lying because you’re pretty much sure that they won’t even care if you suddenly disappear.

Oh maybe they will because nobody will give them money anymore, but basically nothing more than that.

He licks his lips, “I will take care of it. I’ll talk to them.”

“How about my j-job? I need to show up to my office because I’m the breadwinner to my family. I h-have to send money to them.” facts. That’s very much true. You did lost contact with your parents right after they kicked you out, but then after figuring about your new found job, they started asking you for money again.

“I’ll support them, don’t worry. I won’t let them starve. And for your job...” he stalls his words, eyes wonders far remembering that you are working in a company that he actually owned.

He smiled inwardly thinking of transferring the ownership into yours instead. Right. That could work. In that way, you will be the CEO of that company, you don’t ever need to worry about being late or absent most of the times.

But then he also remembers what Jake told him. His friend mentions something about not informing you that he owns the company yet. He said it will probably cause him trouble more than benefit him.

“You don't have to work anymore. Quit your job.” he instructs strictly.

You’re completely caught off-guard so you raised an eyebrow at him, “Excuse me? I’m not going to quit my job.”

You love your job. It’s been the first time ever that you actually enjoyed your workplace. The employees were always nice at you and don’t hate you for basically doing nothing bad towards them.

“I will take care of you and everything you need so there’s no need for that.” he sounded so confident. Like the type of confidence that gives you the impression that he can buy you everything.

“Why?” you asked finding him unbelievable. “I don’t understand why you will support me and take care of me. I’m not your wife? We’re not even in a relationship.”

Because the way he said those things, its only applicable for a husband assuring his wife that he will take care of them. That she can lean on him and don’t worry about anything anymore.

His eyes brightens a bit, it was hard to tell but you manage to see it. Even if its just in a very short time.

“Do you want to change that? Want to be my wife? Let’s get married.” you are taken aback even more. The way he surprises you over and over is amusing.

He’s really losing his mind.

Your shoulder fell as you keep your stares at him. “Mr. Park, look—”

“Sunghoon.” he cuts you off. “Call me Sunghoon.”

You gulped, couldn't handle how soft the tone he just used. The way he softly said it almost sent you to oblivion. Heart thumping and stomach churning. Crazy how this man affects you just by talking gently.

“I’m dead serious here. I don’t know anything about you except for the fact that you’re Park Sunghoon, a mafia who does a lot of illegal stuff and the one who kidnapped me.”

Sunghoon’s trying so hard to listen, after all he doesn’t want to miss any of the things you’re saying. But the way you look so beautiful in front of him is very distracting. The way your lips moves everytime you talk, your hands gestures that you unconsciously do and your facial expression that absolutely adorable.

“So you want to know me more?”

Your lips hangs open, unable to find the right words to say in order to make this gorgeous man understand.

His intense gaze and smirk slowly forming his lips made you blush. It still doesn’t make sense how someone this good looking exist at your lifetime. This man have the face of somebody from a manga.

“All right. Let’s go on dates then.” his grin just grew wider at the amount of ideas for your dates that occupies his mind.

He’s down bad for you, willing to do and give everything just to please you. He knew he’s in trouble and that soon enough he’ll be a slave to you. But that’s the least of his concern.

You can drain his bank accounts, which is not possible, as long as he can have you.

“Wear this.” he said as he place this elegant dress at the bed you were laying on moments ago. You looked at it with cautious eyes. They were clearly still puffy with all the crying you just did after you two arrived at his huge mansion last night.

“I don’t want to.”

“I’m not asking. I am telling you to wear it.” he spat and sat down at the chair. He looked extra handsome today, wearing something that surely suits him well.

Your eyes darted at the dress and you can’t help but to admire it. It is undeniably beautiful, but your gaze wanders back to his suit. It doesn’t match his dark clothing.

A sundress with a pastel color, slightly doesn’t go along with his usual formal wear but totally your type of style. It doesn’t look bad, the combination is fine, just gives different dynamic. It perfectly shows how different your personalities are.

“What are you waiting for?” his tone indicates how he’s really out of patience already.

“Do you expect me to change here? In front of them?” you asked sarcastically and even motioned his men.

His eyes turned dark right away, “Leave the room.” he seriously said and without another word, they did leave.

You furrowed your eyes as you watch how he didn’t even budge from his place, “You too.”

He tilted his head at the side, “And why? I want to stay and watch.” he smirked dangerously as he scanned you from head to toe, sending instant shiver to your spine.

You felt heat rush over your cheeks and you tried to hide it by quickly crossing your arms at him. “Do you want me to change or not?”

He rolled his eyes before heaving a sigh as he stood up, “Okay, love. Hurry up.” he mumbled before walking close to you and casually placing a kiss at the side of your head before he heads out.

You were stunned at the sudden affection and you felt your heart racing. Not to mention, he dropped that endearment like a bomb. He’s totally a criminal and everything he does feels illegal.

You sighed and tried calming yourself down. This isn’t the right time to have your heart racing like crazy. He isn’t a nice person.

You head out after putting the dress and scanning yourself at the mirror for two minutes. It looks fine for you, but you feel like it would look better with some make up on and so you did.

Last night after arriving at the airport, you’re escorted into his car. It was a different from the one he used before and kind of made you wonder how many cars does he have.

He soon drove off towards somewhere. You’ve seen these types of vehicle on movies and you knew it can be really fast. But maybe Sunghoon noticed how nervous you are after hearing its roaring engine and drives in a decent speed.

The drive didn’t took long as you notice the car entering this huge gate. Just by the looks of it, you can tell that the person who owns it reeks off of money, which happen to be the same person sitting beside you.

People who wears uniform lined up by the entrance of the main mansion. The property itself is very spacious and you cannot tell how big this land it. Maybe you’ll get a better view in the morning, the dark made it a bit more hard to tell.

“Stay here.” he spat before stepping outside. A pout forms your lips at the way he commands you, but left to just follow it. The plane ride and all that happened prior to this somehow drains you, unable to even put up a fight to escape.

Besides, the view of this wonderful mansion sure took your interest. It was so elegant and beautiful. Something that everybody dreams of living in. A dreamland.

He opens your door and despite the faint glare on your eyes, you mumble a short thank you for him. He smirks then helps you get out from the vehicle.

His serious and placid expression went back the moment he faces his people. It caught your attention and watches how quick he changes his mood.

Everyone bows as you walk pass them and it made you a bit uncomfy. They’re paying respect for Sunghoon and since he’s dragging you to walk along with you, it looks like they’re doing the same thing to you.

It made you feel uneasy and ended up lowering your head for them as well. Greeting them softly while passing by. Sunghoon heard it and glances over his shoulder. He saw how you’re confused on what you’re suppose to do.

It was adorable that he craned his neck too quickly in order to hide the smile forming his lips.

The inside of the mansion is even more breath-taking. Although, you didn’t have much time to admire every part of it since it was really huge and since Sunghoon asked you to be escorted to your room so you can rest.

And now, here you are. Inside one of the big, elegant rooms of his mansion. Staring at your reflection through the big mirrors inside the fancy bathroom. It was like a dream. Even the biggest hotels you’ve been to doesn’t match the luxury of this place.

After realizing you’ve taken so much time preparing and maybe he’s out of patient already, you decided to go. Heart started thumping again out of worry.

When you stepped out from the room, you saw how Sunghoon’s eyes sparkled. He looked amused like as if he just saw something amazing. You can't help but once again blush hardly because you didn’t even fixed yourself that much.

With a few steps he approached closer, “You look so beautiful.” he stated and gently grabbed your hands before he took it to his lips and planted a small kiss.

You’re completely caught off guard and you can feel blood rushing over to your cheeks. The strong urge to resist these feelings inside your stomach are trying hard to put up a fight to unwanted feelings he’s slowly waking inside you. His intense stares are really giving you a hard time. He stood right in front of you gorgeously, his aura screaming nothing but power and dominance.

“You look so beautiful.” he repeated himself like as if the first time he said it was not enough.

With a blushing face, “C-Can you cut it out? It’s the dress that’s pretty.” you tried to avoid his eyes but then something about them kept pulling your gazes back.

Sunghoon tilted his head and leaned closer to your face with a small grin on his pretty lips, he moved his hand then slowly rested it over your waist. With soft strokes he caress it up and down, eyes never leaving your shy ones.

“I disagree. The dress looked pretty only because you're the one wearing it.” he stated firmly and you gulped as he drop a kiss at your cheeks once before guiding you out of that place.

The fresh, cold air felt amazing as it blew over your skin. He opened the car’s door for you and without any complain, you entered.

The few times that the mafia boss visited you to talk clearly taught you some lessons. He gets pissed easily whenever you don’t obey. And putting him into that mood always doesn’t end well. In order to make sure you won’t make your situation even worst, you’ve got to try not to piss him off.

“Where are we going?” you question when he made it at the driver’s seat.

His car, as expected, is like those expensive sports car you’ve only seen in movies. You don’t know much about cars, but it suits him well. This type of vehicle is perfect for the young mafia boss. Looked so cool and just by looking at it is enough to say about his status in life.

He glanced at you for a while as he started the engine. You even saw some of his men taking the vehicles just around where Sunghoon’s car.

“I’m taking you to a proper date. To celebrate that I finally found you.” he said.

Despite knowing the fact that he had been searching for you for years now, you still find it unbelievable. Not that he doesn’t have the resources and money for doing all of that, but the bigger question is why? Why would he do all these things for someone he just met once?

You still cannot understand and believe how someone like him can do all of those for you?

Your stares unconsciously darted at his direction and your stares remained. He looked extremely attractive even when he's just maneuvering the car. His biceps flex whenever he move the steering wheel.

You knew he’s a very dangerous man and not in a million times have the thought of being in a date together with a mafia boss occurred to you. At first, you really don’t believe at such people but after that one time when you witnessed a live shootout, the realization finally dawned onto you.

And now, the main proof sitting right next to you. Driving you and going out with you on a date.

Your heart aches as you watch Sunghoon beside you. The thoughts of how his image and personality strongly contradicts how gentle he treats you makes you feel a bit of hesitation of running away from him.

Something about him makes you want to stay but of course, you also want to be free again and to have your normal life. You know deep inside, you need to do something to get away tonight.

You two eventually arrived at the said fancy restaurant. He stopped his car right in front and a valley rushed to assist for the parking. Sunghoon steps out and walks gracefully on your side to open the door for you. You’re a little hesitant to accept his hand, but decided to do it.

It was a bit cold and rough. For some reason, it sent you a different kind of comfort.

Once you stepped out of his car, you get the chance to roam your eyes around to check the place. From outside, the place looked amazing. There are staffs by the lobby, waiting for customers that will arrive. If it isn’t in the situation, you would be excited and all. Its your dream to actually eat at a place like this.

“Let’s go.” he says before he slowly guided you inside, his big hand resting at the small of your back.

There’s no need to get in line as the staff recognized him right away. He walks closer and smiles brightly then bow his head.

“Mr. Park, this way to your table.”

As usual, Sunghoon didn’t say anything and just guided you gently to the direction where the staff was guiding the two of you.

Once settled at your table, the two of you ordered the food you want to eat. It was mostly him who picked since you don’t know what's the best one to try here. You leave it to him. He seems to be a regular here.

It slightly made you wonder how many girls has he brought here for a date. You frown faintly at the thought.

In the middle of waiting, Sunghoon excused himself to go to the bathroom for a short while and that was your cue to try to ask for help. You glanced around to check if any of his men are just near. When its clear, you wait for the perfect opportunity to make your move.

When one of the waiters approach your table to place the food he ordered, you held him by the arm softly. The man, which you think is in his mid-forty's, stopped and turned to you, confused.

“Yes, ma’am?” his eyes flashes worry, seeing how you’re really scared.

“H-Help me please. I’ve been kidnapped by the man who took me here.” you said right away.

The man’s eyes widen in surprise before he looked around to check the surrounding and check which one are you referring to. Not a lot of people are around but there are some customers by the corners, enjoying their times.

He held your arm gently, “Alright miss. We will help you.” the man said and even ask if you can go with him by the lobby so they can alert the authorities about this.

You agreed without hesitation, letting him guide you back to where you walked inside along with Sunghoon.

When the two of you are about to exit the hall, you happen to meet someone half-way. You can’t explain the look at his eyes when you saw him stare at you coldly then slowly trailed his gaze over to the man who was planning to help you.

“And where do you think are you going?” his low voice quickly sent shivers all over your spine and you felt the man in front of you stiffened.

“M-Mr. Park.” he stuttered, surprised to see him staring coldly at him.

He knew him of course, and just to see him looking that way over him, he felt his knees trembling in fear. He put two into two together and its not long until he realized what he got himself into.

“Who said you can touch her?” he tilts his head, color draining his face.

Sunghoon’s mind was clouded by nothing but jealousy. Here he is, finally with you and the next thing he know, another man was holding your arm, sneaking you away. Stealing you from him. Taking you from him. It was like a trigger. Something inside him snapped.

The man was quick to let go of your arm, like as if being burned by it. Fear present over his face, beads of sweat forming over his forehead and throat starting to feel dry.

“I d-didn’t know.” he tried to defend himself and even tried to raise his hand as sign of surrender.

The man knew it was no use. Sunghoon is known for being very cruel and ruthless. Mercy doesn’t exist in his vocabulary. Once you mess with him, its already over for you. There’s no escape, feet basically buried under the grave.

Sunghoon pulled out a gun and you panicked right away as you watch him pointed it to the poor man. The people around was surprise and scared as well. Some even standing from their tables with unfinished food, getting ready to leave the place just in case.

You noticed some walke closer to see who it was, pissed expression over their faces for probably ruining their day. But once they saw who it was, their faces will turn pale and they’re quickly halt steps. Keeping a safe distance and remained silent to stay away from trouble.

“S-Sunghoon, please!” you said attempting to stop him but you are afraid too. He turned his head and stared at your scared face.

His face remained stern and emotionless. A tear fell from your eyes as you slowly shake you head at him, “You w-wouldn’t--” you shut your eyes as you suddenly crouched down at the floor as you hear him fire the gun with no hesitation.

You heard screams and the whole place then fell silent. When you open your eyes, you almost lose it when you saw the poor man’s cold body laying on the floor. You were dumbfounded and out of your senses, eyes brimming with tears. You didn’t even noticed that he walked closer and picked you up using one of his arm.

He started dragging you out of that place. The staff stayed out of the way, they look beyond horrified. Nobody dares to stop him. He walked with so much arrogance, doesn’t even bothered by what he just did.

Sunghoon was beside you, his head resting over the stirring wheel as his hands shakes for some unknown reason. His breathing were heavy and fast like as if he was trying to calm himself down.

“You k-killed him..” you managed to say when you arrived inside his car.

When it finally manage to compose yourself a bit, tears started streaming down your face. The poor man just died! And it was all your fault.

“You k-killed him! How dare you! You're a monster!” you said and started hitting him nonstop.

He grunted and held your arm to stop you from hitting him more. Your eyes met his cold ones, you can’t describe what kind of emotion was present but one thing’s for sure, he’s raging mad.

“I already warned you not to piss me off.” he hissed and you cried while staring at him.

“J-Just let me go,” your low, but desperate plea tugs something inside Sunghoon’s heart.

For a while, you saw something flickered through his eyes. It was fast but you managed to figure out what it was. Sadness? You can’t even believe someone like him are capable to feel that kind of emotion. For you, he’s heartless.

Even before you can say anything else, he covered your nose with something and you just slowly felt yourself losing consciousness.

“I love you,” he whispered softly before everything went black.

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[faeriekit]

Health and Hybrids (XV)👽👻💚

[I can't remember the original prompt posters  for the life of me but here's a mashup between a cryptid!Danny, presumed-alien!Danny, dp x dc, and the prompt made the one body horror meat grinder fic.]

PART ONE is here PART TWOis here PART THREE is here PART FOUR is here and PART FIVE is here PART SIX is here and PART SEVEN is here PART EIGHT is here PART NINE is here PART TEN is here PART ELEVEN is here PART TWELVE is here PART THIRTEEN is here PART FOURTEEN is here and this is part fifteen...somehow...

💚 Ao3 Is here for all parts

Where we last left off... Author regrets both use of Roman numerals and Old English but you know what? We ballin'. Also Danny woke up! With only some complications! woohoo! 🎉

Trigger warnings for this story:  body horror | gore | post-dissection fic | dehumanization (probably) |  my nonexistent attempts at following DC canon. On with the show.

💚👻👽👻💚

Danny comes in and out of consciousness in bursts.

Wherever he is, it’s not the Guys in White. He rules that out very, very quickly.

For one. The Guys in White would not hire a lady to sit around and mind him constantly. He has— The same few doctors come in and out of green-tinged vision consistently. Their tags are different de-saturated colors, but he can recognize most of them.

And, somehow, the lady is there. If not at his side immediately, at his side quickly enough.

With his space shuttle.

With a grip toy.

With…oatmeal.

The oatmeal is what really clues Danny in that this can’t be the GIW.

The GIW would never waste human food on him. Never. It creates too much of a logistical mess: a paper trail of payments, feeding people that don’t exist; the need for cleanup of bio-waste that no one wants to deal with; the cleaning and sanitizing of utensils, which could easily contaminate a living person.

And yet. There is oatmeal.

Mushy, unappetizing oatmeal.

The lady feeds it to him when she’s around. She spoons it into his mouth, quietly chatting all the while. She could be telling him how she’s going to cut out his organs to be chopped up and mounted on glass slides for investigation for all that Danny knows, but still, very patiently, she spoonfeeds him little mouthfuls of oatmeal.

She waits for him to swallow every time. If he stops eating, she lets him stop.

It’s kind. It’s gentle.

It’s…it’s the nicest thing Danny’s had in a long time.

It’s so nice that he stops being overtly weird when the doctors come in. He knows it’s a bad idea. He knows he’s shooting himself in the foot probably.

But…but no one is being mean to him. Everyone is being careful. Gentle.

Quiet. Slow. Obvious.

One of the doctors drops a meal tray once and everyone rushes to quiet it, to check that he’s settled, to…comfort? Him?

The oatmeal tastes bad, by the way. It’s also how he finds out part of his tongue is numb.

Or maybe it tastes bad because some of his tongue is numb.

Either way. Ew. It’s bland and it tastes bad and Danny has to finish all of it, even though he has an IV in him that puts food into him.

His IV itches. He’s sad that he can’t move and can’t protect himself. He’s tired and he’s bored of sitting here. He doesn’t know where he is and no one can tell him because he can’t understand them.

There’s no TV.

There are other concerns to be worried about, but Danny would like a television, please. Something with news on it. Something that could ground him in a location, or a place, or…

The air hisses. For a moment, breathing is going to be easier as the air cycles. It hurts, still, to breathe—the GIW hadn’t thought Danny needed to breathe, so they hadn’t put him back together right. He breathes through cobbled-together organs and raw pink seams, but yet. He breathes.

Danny lays there, and he breathes. He clutches his space shuttle toy between his wrist and his thigh, because he can.

There’s a whisper against the door. The heavy mechanisms of the door clank out of place.

Danny’s eyelids flutter as they fail to either open or close. The green in his vision bunches and falls as they try. The lady must be back.

Surely, enough, she is. Her paper gown is a mint blue today. It matches her mask and her gloves, but not her pinkish-grey shoes. She comes through the door, and—

—there’s something behind her.

It’s. They’re. Humanoid? They’re…green?

Danny stares, his head against the pillow, his eyes wide. They’re. They’re floating.

He can’t stop staring. His eyelids don’t even twitch. The lady walks to his bedside, and the…the other one follows him.

“Wel mette,” the lady greets him again, her fingers on the very corner of his mattress and no further. “Eom hebbjan ure freond.”

Danny has no idea what that means. He stares; he stares at the…their… Is that a ghost? Is a ghost just…walking around??

The—the being has—their head isn’t super. Humanoid. It’s more oval and angular, to be honest. But the rest of them is; their outfit is certainly out of the world Danny has grown up in, and is mostly constructed of straps crossing around the larger shapes of their body. And a…cloak…?

Is this a ghost?? It has to be, right? But a ghost of what??

There’s a sensation. Danny doesn’t have control over his body in the way that he’s used to, but this sensation isn’t aimed at his—it doesn’t—it’s not physical. It’s just a touch. A feeling.

Like he thought. A sensation. But still. Its presence is…Danny’s pretty sure it’s a greeting.

He…he doesn’t greet back. He doesn’t know if this is a friend.

…Lots of ghosts pretend to be something they’re not. He doesn’t know who this ghost is. He doesn’t know who this lady is. His head hurts and it’s hard to think and he knows everyone just wants to hurt him even when they pretend not to. Or they don’t even know it yet.

So he turns his head and pretends he’s dead. (Or. Uh. Dead-er.) Dead things don’t have thoughts, duh. You can’t read mine if I don’t have any!

The ghost drifts closer. Danny can’t move—he can’t run, can barely flinch—but he can feel how taut he gets the closer they get, the further they get into his personal bubble.

The greeting comes again. It’s quieter on the second round. Gentler. The ghost is trying not to scare him, is trying not to hurt him. Just careful, gentle contact.

Danny squeezes his eyes closed. It doesn’t work (whoops) because his eyes don’t close right (he forgot about that) and then his head hurts a lot because he’s working a whole lot of muscles who were not prepared to put in so much effort at the drop of a hat.

The greeting turns a little…melancholy. It matches the tone that the lady takes on when Danny’s breathing stutters and his body screams with exhaustion he can’t shake.

He doesn’t want it. He doesn’t want to talk to anyone. He doesn’t want to be poked and prodded and then attacked when the ghost realizes Danny’s not Fun the way the ghosts want him to be—willing to play around when people get hurt or ignore the pain around them. Danny just wants to be left alone.

The greeting is gently let go. From the ghost comes a question—something soft. Something celestial. Danny can’t tell the specifics, but there are moons and stars in the question.

…His fingers flex around the plastic shell of his model shuttle. There’s. He’s. Space?

The green ghost turns to the lady. “Læt uns ga an wealc”, they say, in that English Danny doesn’t know and doesn’t understand.

The lady says something back to them. They say something back to the lady. The lady goes to the wall, where there is a phone, and says something.

Danny tenses. This is it. She’s calling in for backup. More people are coming and it’s going to hurt.

The phone call ends. The lady comes back and Danny tenses—

But there’s nowhere to run and his physical body is too weak to hide properly. She reaches his bedside, reaches out her arms, and Danny flinches away.

He can’t shut his eyes. He can’t stop seeing her outstretched arms because he can’t shut his eyes.

“Mæg eom ahebbe eow?”

Danny doesn’t know what that means!!!

The ghost brushes their fingers up against the steel rail of Danny’s cot. There’s an image—of the lady, clear as day, in a red and blue and gold outfit, bridal-carrying someone from building rubble. There’s a prodding at his core that says you, there, in particular.

He’s dumbfounded. Like, to lift? To lift him?

There’s a sense of agreement, and then the image of a cot with wheels. The wheels are the focus of the message.

…They’re asking Danny permission? To go somewhere?

On one hand, no, Danny doesn’t want to be any further complicit into whatever horrible kidnapping scheme this probably is. This place sucks. He doesn’t want to see more of it. This is the second worst kidnapping he’s ever had and he wants no part in it.

On the other hand, however, this place sucks, and getting out of here, even if only temporarily…

Danny licks his lips. There’s craters in the soft tissue. He tastes orange pixie sticks and the sour tang of battery acid.

If Danny is very, very smart. And very, very careful. And very, very quiet… Well. What are the chances they wheel him past the exit on this excursion?

Sure, they’re pretty low. But there’s hope.

Danny hasn’t had hope in ages.

He nods. He hates that he does—his neck jerks upwards, and then he’s sore and tired everywhere and in his head and neck and shoulders, and he’s not going to be able to move much more than that for literal hours (sorry, oatmeal mush), and he’s said yes.

“Þancie eow!” the lady says, and the ghost translates that for him as thank you and then she lifts Danny up off the bed cot he lives on like he’s still a ghost, and not made of heavy, teenage flesh. Wow is she strong. Danny hopes her job isn’t to hurt him. Otherwise he’s going to be a smear of green on the wall and then what would the point of inspecting his insides be??

Danny gets lifted. Danny gets carried.

(It’s not an amazing experience on his aching body. He thinks some of his bruises start to leak ectoplasm in self defense. Her arms are as stiff as rocks.)

Being lifted is also how Danny finds out there’s something caging his legs. They don’t seem to be caged together—they hang individually—but they keep them taut and aligned so that all the pressure of being lifted is on his hips, and not his legs. Considering that Danny’s received pretty medium care for his troubles…that doesn’t bode well for whatever state his legs are in.

Danny gets gently, gently placed down onto a new cot. The side bars are metal, but thinner than on the bed he woke up on.

The world starts to move.

Oh. They’re moving. Danny’s moving.

It’s kind of startling. The world’s been so static and fuzzy for so long, and now he’s bedridden but moving.

The ghost opens the door, and Danny’s still body and the bed follow with it. The lady has to be pushing, then. They go through it and—

—Danny blearily squints. Ow. Bright.

Bright, LED light follows Danny down steel hallways and past strangers in bright outfits, their colors pale and washed out by Danny’s attempts to squeeze green eyelids together and stop seeing everything.

He wants to stop. This is too much. He bites his lip—jaw aching—and grunts—throat tearing—and—

The ghost that keeps trying to talk to him sends some other emotion, and Danny purposefully ignores them. It’s easy enough to block things you don’t want to feel. The green wall of a body floats out in front of him to open another door, and Danny is pushed inside.

The lights are off in here. The tension in Danny’s forehead gets a little quieter. That’s…nice. It makes the window in the room seem bigger and brighter, and—

Danny jerks. His whole body screams at him as he claws against the cot, trying to get closer, closer—

He hurts something in his back. He can tell. There’s something in his hips that’s strained, or possibly fractured, as he climbs across a horizontal surface. The beings around him make worried, scared noises, and that doesn’t matter right up until the bed moves so Danny can push his face right up against the glass.

Because that’s space out there. The stars are out there. And Danny is so, so close to them.

It’s so…

…Danny doesn’t know how much time he loses to starlight before he falls asleep.

*

“Did you see!” Diana gushes, the windows going by. The cot (and the alien in it) she pushes through the hall, the occasional curious eye turning to them as they go past. “J’onn, did you see, he had glowed! I know we had hoped that he would be receptive, but—“

“Diana,” J’onn murmurs, his voice low. Wonder Woman’s head tilts to find him behind her, and she only slows just enough to not run the cot or its occupant into any unsuspecting superheroes.

The first fear is for the worst scenario. “Did the excursion hurt him?”

The Martian hesitates. “…No,” he says, and nothing more. He drifts forward to the metaphorical prow of their vehicle, and Diana sets her shoulders into generating momentum. J’onn opens doors for them as they pass.

The alien child isn’t awake to consent to be returned to his newly cleaned bed, but Diana feels secure enough returning him to his usual haunt that she proceeds to do so.

Even when physical, he is frighteningly limp in her arms.

She takes care to support his head as she pulls him up to her chest. He is so fragile. When the light comes across his face as he moves, parts of his face are still ominously transparent. Ominously liquid. Ominously green.

Diana should not be able to see the inner airways of his nose, nor the thin, still-healing holes in his skull, or his irises while his eyes try in vain to shut with skin they do not have.

She lays him down. Gently, she tucks him under thin sheets with gloved hands.

J’onn drifts over to her side. His feet haven’t touched the ground—not since he was reminded that visible signs of non-human life might be reassuring to a non-human. “He doesn’t remember us,” he says. Diana hears him.

And then she hears him.

“He what?”

“He has no memory of his time on the base. He has no memory yourself, of our previous communication, of the junior heroes… He has no understanding of the layout of the base, nor of things we had already established: my status as an alien lifeform to Earth and the base’s lunar occupancy. As far as he knows, he woke up here a week and a half ago to strangers having taking up a caretaker’s role, and he doesn’t know why and if we will harm him.”

Diana stills. She…takes a deep breath.

“Alright,” she whispers. And then, louder: “Alright. We can fix this.”

And they will, although it will take time, because even if he doesn’t remember them, Diana knows him—a child with too much fear, who likes to be around others, who occasionally plays around but likes his boundaries respected. A child who put glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling.

“Oh,” Diana realizes at last, reaching a point J’onn had already understood: “Impulse is going to be so disappointed.”

[fandom-friday]

The goal of Fandom Friday: provide a place where people can shout-out their favorite creators from the week, whether it’s a piece of fan art that made you smile or a fanfic that moved you. Drop a link to your favorite creations this week into my ask box along with what you loved about it, and I will give them a shout! It doesn’t have to be Star Wars either! If it’s on another website (AO3, Twitter, etc.), please be sure to state that as well.

This happens each week, so don’t feel like you’ve got to get out everything in one week. Just keep track of them throughout the week or send me an ask whenever you find something, and I’ll drop them all on Fridays (or throughout the weekend if I get a lot). The cutoff for each week is THURSDAY 12 PM (I’m in the Pacific timezone). Anything received after that will roll to the next week. A summary of the weeks’ recs will be posted at the end of the weekly queue, so check back here for all of the awesome fics and art! And be sure to go give the creations on that list some love (and don’t just share the ask responses I put out).

2024 Fandom Friday Weekly Summary Master List

Rules and additional details under the cut! PLEASE make sure you read the rules before sending something in. If your submission violates any of the rules, I will delete it.

Rules:

Please send submissions to my ask box (sending them all to one place makes wrangling them easier each week). In your ask, please include the creator’s handle, a link to their work/post (if links aren’t working for the ask, please DM me them), and what you loved about it!

Please ensure the link is to the creator’s original post and not your own reblog or repost of their work (if they’re on another platform). The idea is to drive people to visit the creator’s page!

The creation does not have to have been posted this week! It can be something older. Also, don’t worry about whether or not a rec is a repeat from a prior week. Just looking to celebrate things that made an impression on you this week, whether you’ve seen it before or not!

NSFW is alright! Just make sure you note it in the ask so I can flag appropriately! Since I’m including 18+ material, minors may not participate. 18+ posts will be tagged with NSFT/lemon/lemony lemon (trying to cover all my bases).

NO incest, underage, cl*necest blogs, master/padawan (or similar power dynamics), dub-con/non-con/rape occurring IN the fic (to include stalker/obsessive behavior fics). Also, no H*rry Potter. There are a few others that I also won’t share due to my discomfort with them (i.e., R*xsoka), so if you’re not sure, ask. Also, many of you submit multiple works at once, and that’s fine, but if one of those works contains something that violates the rules, I will delete the entire ask, so something to be extra careful about when submitting!

Submissions that deal with 18+ material or difficult/triggering topics (pregnancy, abuse, drug use, etc.) MUST BE TAGGED APPROPRIATELY.

If your rec involves spoilers from a show that’s currently running, please include that info in the ask so I can tag it appropriately (I will normally tag a few different ways, but I always use #<show title> spoilers if you need to filter (for example: Andor spoilers will be tagged #Andor Spoilers). I will stop tagging spoilers two weeks after the show stops airing.

You can submit GIF sets or edits, but please ensure you are submitting from the blog that actually created them. Wanted to add that caution since there’s been a lot of people stealing/reposting GIFs and edits in particular recently. So just be cautious.

Try to avoid commentary in your ask that might make others feel bad (“the only person who knows how to write XXX correctly…”). It’s important to be able to appreciate creators without making others feel bad, so let’s try to keep the commentary complimentary without being off-putting for other creators.

Self recommendations are allowed and encouraged! Shout out your own hard work! You deserve the recognition!

*Rules subject to change so PLEASE make sure you read them before sending something in. If your submission violates any of the rules, I will delete it.

**If you have any questions about any of the rules, don’t hesitate to DM me!In addition to sending me asks, I highly encourage you to go either leave a comment on and/or reblog someone’s work (tag me or use the #Fandom Friday tag if you do!). Let’s get the interaction back up on this website and show the creators that work so hard on their stuff some love!

[malarkgirlypop]

MEDIC! Part 39 (Donald Malarkey x Fem!OC)

Don't be mad at me, ok!

TW- talks of R*pe, SA, Violence, talks of assault, (please let me know if I missed any).

Based on the HBO show and the actors who portray the characters, not hate to anyone involved.

Tag list: @imusicaddict, @b00ks1ut , @mstiemountainhop, @awaterfalls, @lovememadly92 @lucyfromtheoldhouse @blueberry-ovaries, @next-autopsy anyone else please let me know.

It felt as if all the air had been sucked from the room. My body shook with each second that ticked by in silence. The room had frozen, I looked from face to face, each with its own horrified grimace or rage filled stare. I glanced over my shoulder, Bull and Martin still held me steady but their faces had paled in colour, Bull appeared as if he was going to be sick as Martin’s had turned from grey to crimson.  

No one uttered a word, the decision of what we were going to do hung on the Captain's shoulders. Speirs still hovered over the man, his glare set firm. He looked like a man ready to kill, and I was ready to see it happen. 

Speirs cocked his gun, the only sound that filled the room. I stilled. Waiting with anticipation, yes kill him! 

Speirs raised the gun to the man’s head, finger on the trigger. The men stepped back, turning away from the scene. But I watched never taking my gaze off the replacement, I wanted to watch the light leave his eyes. If Emily was really dead like he said, I needed to watch him die just like he had her. 

The thought alone almost broke me, he was the last face she saw. So many questions flooded my brain, did he drag it out? Did he make her suffer? What was she thinking of when she had died? The questions alone filled me with so much fury I clenched my teeth together so hard they felt as if they were going to crack. 

How was I going to survive if Emily wasn’t here? Speirs’ actions hushed my racing mind.  

Speirs stood still, raising the gun at the man, a slight tremor to his hand. I could see him fighting with his morals. But this was Speirs, the ruthless killer. Or were those just tales. The Speirs we had heard about wouldn’t have hesitated, he would’ve pulled the trigger without a blink of an eye. But I watched the Captain, as he stared down the man. The man that had killed multiple other people, had shot Grant, had raped my Emily and murdered her in cold blood. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t shoot the man who had done the most awful things to innocent people. So maybe they were just tales then.   

He pulled the gun back, the soldiers in the room letting out the breath they were holding. Speirs glanced down at his hand covered in the replacement's blood, he wiped it on the man’s shirt. Looking disgusted. He took off his hat, straightening himself. 

I couldn’t hold back anymore, I ripped free from my fellow soldier’s grip. Striding forward I took a hold of the Captain’s collar, I was foaming at the mouth with rage. 

“What are you doing?! Shoot him! Kill him!” Ron’s face remained neutral as if I wasn’t screaming in his face. 

“Malarkey, two wrongs don’t make a right.” Speirs slipped free from my grasp. 

“He killed people! He deserves to die! I thought you cared about Grant and Em?” I threw insult to injury, I wanted a reaction from him, he was too calm. 

Ron’s head whipped around as he stalked back to me. 

“I do care.” His finger prodded at my chest. “He’s a drunk piece of shit that should be held accountable for his crimes, killing him would be putting him out of his misery. I care for my soldiers, Emily included, and that is why I will not kill that man.” Ron’s voice echoed around the room. 

“But they're dead, he took them from us, so now we get to take what is owed.” I challenged him.  

“Have the MP’s take care of this piece of shit.” He ordered the other men standing around us, not giving me an answer. 

“Grant’s not dead Malarkey. His shot wasn’t fatal. I didn’t kill him, because I have every hope that Emily is still alive.” Ron didn’t let me utter another word, he turned on his heel marching from the room. 

“Grant’s alive?” Tab asked the Captain as he left. 

“Kraut surgeon says he’s gonna make it.” The Captain reported. 

“We have to go find her.” I tried to dart from the room but hands held me still. “We’re running out of time! Let me go!” But the man's hand never let me free. 

“LET GO OF ME!” I yelled, but Bull shook his head. 

“No, Don, we need to make a plan. You can’t go running off trying to find her by yourself.” Johnny said as the rest of the men nodded. 

“We don’t have time!” I argued. “She’s hurt, she’s alone.” 

“We know, but Don if we don’t think about this we are increasing her chances of not making it back.” 

“Don, we will find her, she’s tough!” Babe said from over Johnny’s shoulder. The rest of the men agreed. 

They started making plans of teams of people and where they would search for her. I sat staring at the door. Everyone’e voices fading into the background, why didn’t the two men who witnessed it say anything about her being with them. Why didn’t I check on her before we left? I should’ve had her with me in the first place. I was frustrated, and angry. 

How hurt was she? Was she still alive? What if she isn’t alive?

I felt like I was being suffocated. My breathing was shallow and fast. I was panicking. I couldn’t hear anything over my own pounding heart. 

“Ok so Lieb, Babe and Malark are going to go to the road.” I heard Johnny say, I didn’t even wait for him to finish, I was up and out of the room. I heard footsteps behind me as Lieb and Babe fell into step with me.

Emily POV:

“Captain Speirs! Captain Speirs!” I called running up to the man who had left the main building. 

It had taken me quite some time to walk back to the base after the replacement had driven away. I didn’t make it my mission to get back as fast as I could though. I used the silence of walking to process. 

I couldn’t really, it was too hard. It hurt too much. So I grounded myself as I walked, what could I see, hear, touch and smell. Every time I fell back into the event I would ground myself. For now it was something I would push to the back of my mind. The man looked shocked to see me, shit.

“Emily?” The man stopped in his tracks as I approached him. 

“Sir, is Grant alright?” I asked puffing from my run. 

“He’s alive.” He stated, his eyes scanning over me.

“Good! I’m glad! Th-the man?” I asked hesitantly. 

“MPs are sorting him.” I nodded, sighing. 

“Emily, he admitted he hurt you too.” He uttered softly. I nodded again, unsure of what to say. My left hand was clamped over my right shoulder, but I knew that wasn’t the injury he meant. 

“Right.” I hadn’t really thought of what I was going to say, I didn’t really think I was going to make it back. The last thing in my brain had been how I was going to deal with the consequences of his actions. I truly believed that this was my last night here on this earth.  

But here I was standing back at the base, in somewhat of one piece. 

“The replacement hurt me, yes.” I uttered. Ron looked weary, his eyes sunken into his face as lines of worry formed on his brow. 

“I’m ok though, I think.” I couldn’t see the one man who had been so steadfast in all my times of need, looking so distraught.    

Concern marred his face as I lied through my teeth. I wasn’t ok, but I was still breathing, that had to count for something. 

“Em, you don’t have to be brave.” Ron stepped forward, his hand coming to cup my cheek. I stared at the ground unable to look him in the eyes. I knew if I would I wouldn’t be able to hold it together. 

I took a deep breath trying to steady the swell of emotions that tightened my chest.

“I know.” I uttered, my voice not sounding as solid as I needed it to be. 

“Where are you injured?” Ron’s had still held my face, his fingers gingerly titling my chin up so that my gaze met his. 

“Shoulder, throat, cheek, I think that’s everything.” I stated my injuries like they were items on a grocery list. 

“He shot me in the shoulder, strangled me, and hit me over the head with his gun.” As well as violated my body and soul, but I didn’t add that to the conversation. I wanted to keep some semblance of dignity. 

“You need to be treated.” Ron replied in a monotone voice. 

I studied his features, his cold mask had slipped back and was set firmly into place, looking down at me as if I had only scraped my knee. But a flicker in his eyes told me all I needed to know, he was holding it together for me, but only by a thread. 

His stare looked ready to kill, the slight clench in his fist at his side before he flexed his fingers trying to shake loose the rage that rippled through his body. With each breath he took his nostrils flared, like an angry bull. Ron wanted to hurt someone, but he didn’t, for me.  

“The men are planning to look for you, I’ll tell them you’re back.” He turned quickly, going to head back into the main building. 

“Ron.” I called after him. 

At his name he froze, his back still facing away from me. 

“Let me tell them.” My voice was weak, I felt small again, I had been through war literally but in this moment I had never felt more vulnerable. 

Ron turned his eyes scanning me up and down taking in my demeanour. I stood straighter trying to show I was fine, but my face seemed to give me away. 

“I can tell them.” I tried again, putting some strength behind the words. 

Speirs hesitated before nodding. He marched off to where he was going in the first place before I interrupted.    

I took a deep breath before heading to the building I had been only hours before, happy and unaware of my horrific future. Funny how things could change so quickly.  

I made my way into the building, the foyer was empty, but I could hear voices murmuring. Following the sound of the voice I find the men huddled in the main lounge, before I can announce myself I am hit by a solid wall. 

My eyes travel up the figure I barged straight into, trying my best to hide the wince of pain that shoots through my shoulder from the impact. 

Wide-eyed and shocked Don stares down at me, looking at me like he’s seen a ghost. Babe and Lieb peer out from behind the man curious as to why he had stopped so abruptly. Their faces also pale at the sight of me. 

A tight smile finds its way onto my lips, trying to pretend that I am fine for the sake of the men who all look as if they are going to hurl. 

“Em.” Don says softly, moving forward slowly. 

“Hi.” My voice sounds hoarse, I swallow the sharp pain in my throat. 

“EM!” Web calls from behind Don, as he sees me, he surges forward with open arms. 

The sudden movement sent panic rising in my chest, I knew it was only Web but the alarm bells had already been raised. 

I could feel the adrenaline coursing through my veins, as I gasped for air. My brain was only shouting one thing, survive! Survive! Survive!

I stumbled back, raising my hands to fend away his attack. 

“No!” I yelled hysterically. I pitched backwards, my back harshly colliding with the table behind me. The table tipped as the contents that were scattered over it clattered to the floor.  

My breathing was ragged, outstretched hands shook violently, the only sound I could hear was the erratic pounding of my heart. 

Web stopped in his tracks, watching me with concern on his face. As did the rest of the men, they looked at me like a wounded deer. 

I gagged, my stomach churning as it did so. I clutched my hand over my mouth and sprinted back out the front door. I desperately searched for somewhere to hide, I scrambled over to the hedges that framed the front of the property. Keeling over I emptied the contents of my stomach into the bushes. My hands clung to my pants as I reached, dry heaving until there was nothing left. 

A soft hand landed in the middle of my back causing me to turn around in fright. Don held his hands up showing me he was no harm. 

“Sorry, you startled me.” I wiped the back of my hand across my mouth. He stepped forward again but I raised my arm out keeping him at a distance. 

“Just let my panic attack finish and then you can touch me.” I begged, I hated that I had to push him away but I feared if anyone was to touch me at that moment it would trigger another episode. 

I knelt to the ground gracelessly, my jelly-like limbs not leaving much support. My shook with such vigour it chattered my teeth, my breaths were shallow and fast, as the waves of nausea made my head spin. 

Panic attacks weren’t uncommon for me, but I hadn’t had one this bad since my mum died. After she passed I had at least one a day for years. With some anti-anxiety meds and some therapy they finally died down. 

I practised my grounding techniques, focusing on slowing my breathing and distracting myself with my surroundings.    

“What can I do?” Don asked cautiously as he sat at my side. 

“Talk to me, tell me a story.” I said in between my breaths. 

“I will tell you about this girl I met-”

I peeked out of the corner of my eye and a confused look pinched my brow. Don chuckled. 

“Just listen before you get upset.” Don looked over at me, his charming smile shining through the darkness that clouded my mind, a simple gesture eased the pain slightly in my chest. I nodded confirming for him to go on. 

“I met this girl on a tank. She sat up front looking nervous and a bit shell shocked, and for some reason I just wanted to make her feel better. So I asked her where she was from, just to distract her, but I also wanted to see her face clearly in the daylight.” 

New tears welled in my eyes, but it wasn’t from the horrific events prior. He was telling me about the day we met. Right from the start he had only wanted to care for me, he didn’t even know me. 

“We talked for a bit before all hell broke loose, I was kind of in a daze after I had spoken to her. The way she smiled and laughed at my jokes, that’s all I wanted to make her do, smile.” 

I was so focused on his soft voice I forgot completely about the panic that had been strangling me from the inside. I felt my muscles relax and my heartbeat steady. 

“Then we were tossed into battle, she had been ordered to hang back and pick up the strays, but then all of a sudden she was in front of me tending to my best friend. She wasn’t the nervous girl I had met on the tank, she was a force to be reckoned with.” 

“Don.” I whispered. 

“Yeah?” He paused his story, turning to look at me. 

“Thank you.” Reaching out I took his hand that rested on the gravel we sat on. We sat silently, our hands intertwined looking up at the stars in the sky, his fingers brushing over the back of my hand in a soothing manner. 

“Em.” He breathed, I glanced over to him, his brown eyes glazed over as tears brimmed. 

I shifted forward, kneeling beside him as I took him into my embrace. His arms wrapped around my back as he held me tightly, burying his face into the crook of my neck. Don’s body shuddered as he wept, my fingers tangled into his hair as I pressed kisses to the side of his head. 

“I’m ok, Don. I’m ok.” I soothed him. 

“I could’ve lost you.” He pulled back, his wet tears stained his soft checks. Don’s eyes held so much sadness it broke my heart. 

“What would I do without you?” The comment made me think of my decision that loomed over my head. Was I staying or was I going if the time came. 

“I’m here, I’m safe. You have me.” I squeezed him tighter as he sniffed, his hand stroking down my back.   

“I’ll let the guys know you’re safe and then let’s get you to Doc.” He pulled away, letting me dry his tears with my fingers. I bent down pressing the softest kiss to his lips. 

Don’s POV:

I stopped in my tracks, trying not to run into the person who appeared in front of me. My heart almost burst from relief as I took in her face. She wore a blank expression, her cheek cut open and bruised, blood had stained the side of her face, but there were tear streaks that ran through the crimson. 

She gave me her tight lipped I’m-ok smile, which almost always meant she was not ok. I could tell she wasn’t ok just from her eyes. They looked haunted and lifeless. Em’s eyes usually sparkled with joy and light, now that light had been put out, and it killed me. 

“Em.” Her name fell from my lips with ease. I stepped forward slowly, like she was a scared kitten so skittish one false move would send her under the table. 

“Hi.” Her voice was hoarse. Her eyes searched mine, even from here I could see the horror of what they had endured. Web startled all of us, when he yelled her name, running towards her. 

The look of pure panic etched into her features. That moronic idiot didn't even notice until it was too late. She clung to the table, her body shaking as she gagged. Em’s face paled, her pupils  were so big you would think her eyes were black. 

The “no” that wretched itself free from her lips was haunting on its own. But paired with the way she had shaken her head so furiously trying to get her point across, crushed my heart right there in my chest. 

She didn’t feel safe. 

Web stopped, finally taking in her demeanour. But it was too late, she was already out the door quicker than anyone could yell for her to stop. 

Eyes fell on me, but I was already marching out the door, sending a glare over my shoulder in Web’s direction. 

I came outside to find her kneeling on the ground, her body heaved as she vomited. 

Em asked me to distract her, the only thing that came into my head is the first day we properly met. She had sat right on the front of the tank, nervously taking away to Bull, who had been distracted. I watched her realise that he wasn’t listening and let her conversation die on her tongue. 

She nervously shook her leg, even from behind I could see her shoulders were tense as she tried to find anything to distract her. So I had, it was more for selfish reasons really. I wanted to be the one she nervously rambled too, not Bull. 

The whole tank ride we had spoken to each other, she talked so animatedly, her bright blue eyes shining in the warm sun and her rosy cheeks that flushed when I told her jokes. Em was the most beautiful person I had ever seen, inside and out. I think I had fallen in love with her then. 

But then I got closer to her, she made friends with my friends and I found she was the only thing that I could think of, day and night, it was only ever her.  

But I hadn’t told her all of that. I couldn't form the words. 

I sat beside her until she had declared it was over. Pain still haunted her eyes. I was losing her again. I had just gotten her back. I couldn’t lose her. I needed her. I don’t think she even knew the impact she had on me. 

I remembered one night when she woke screaming from her nightmares, she said she had felt selfish. I dismissed her idea immediately. Never had she ever been selfish, she gave everything to me, she leaned on me when she needed and I did the same with her. 

I’m sure she didn’t even notice when she was doing it. Her small jokes, the way she touched me gently, her look of concern and care, the way her eyes found mine in every room she walked into. We looked after each other from the very start.

Em was a light in the darkness. But even sunshine could be covered by clouds. 

I told her I would inform the men she was safe and then take her to get treated for her injuries. I’m sure they had questions, we all did. But she would tell us with time. We wouldn’t push her.

**************************************

Chapter 40

[lucienarcheron]

Spirit Meets the Bones - XII

Genre: Angst/Romance  Warnings: Mentions of physical abuse. Please be mindful: some implied language may be found triggering.

shoutout to @abruisedmuse for letting me always cry to you about this. ily <3

tagging: @climb-the-mountian | @vanserrass | @positivewitch | @readthelastpaage | @zenkindoflove | @animezinglife | @clockwork-ashes | @stormycleric | @eastofatlanta | @carolynmezzosoprano | @carnythian | @runningwiththeoceans | @readychilledwine | @goldenmagnolias | @thedarkinmansfield | @mali22 | @maidr-00 | @electromagnetic-waves | @theeternalstruggle | @devilsfoodcake22 | @the-midnightwriter | @moonfawnx | @weesablackbeak | @ladywhilemia | @illyrianshadowhunter | @alohaangels | @moobell55 | @bibliophiliaxvignette | @easchies | @feysandfeels | @thelovelymadone | @corcracrow | @aboggoblin Find it all here.

Every day after that, the two of them woke up with the sole purpose of watching each other. Eris watching Iris and Iris watching Eris.

Eris followed up on his promise with training and the first few sessions were the most entertaining time of his life.

“Tell me your favorite color.”

Eris had only blinked and blocked Iris’s attempt to jab him in the ribs.

“My favorite color?” he repeated with a snort. “Why?”

“It's a valid question.” she said indignantly and aimed for another swipe that he easily deflected. “This is a basic piece of information any couple should know about each other.”

“If you keep bracing yourself, I’ll see the hit coming and block it. Don’t hesitate, just hit.” he instructed, tapping her elbow and though Iris narrowed her eyes, she nodded. “Get a hit in and I’ll tell you.”

Iris rolled her eyes and stepped back, putting her hands on her hips. “So now I have to earn my information? What happened to a question for a question?”

“You’ve been itching to smack me since you met me, so I figured this was the proper motivation.” Eris said with a smirk. “You also didn’t actually ask a question, wife.”

Iris flipped him off and then resumed position across from him. “Fine, smartass.” she huffed. “A question for a question.”

“Yes, wife?”

“What’s your favorite color?” she asked dully, and Eris’s lips twitched.

“I don't know. I don’t think about colors.”

Which was one of the many, many lies Eris had been constantly telling himself these days.

He had started to think about colors quite a lot actually. He thought about the way he particularly loved the color green on her. And the color wine. And he didn’t want to admit how the color purple had nearly brought him to his knees the first time she wore it.

He thought about the color pink when she painted her lips with it and worse, when she flushed, and that same pink bloomed on her lovely cheeks.

His favorite color was the color of her eyes and the way they lit up in excitement whenever they did anything together these days. But Eris had no need to mention that. No need at all.

“That’s not a real answer, you cheat.” she replied then held the dagger up threateningly and Eris chuckled.

“What’s yours?”

“Cerulean.”

He wouldn’t think about her in that color and how magnificent it would look against her tanned skin. Instead, Eris pursed his lips and said dully, “You mean blue?”

Iris fully stopped and shot him a look of annoyance so cold, Eris had to fight everything in him not to laugh.

“You dress too well to pretend you don’t know your colors. I’ll just guess then.” she finally said and began pacing around him. He only watched her with a raised brow and a smirk, turning as she turned.

“What do you think is my favorite color then?”

Iris pursed her lips, silent for a moment then pointed with the dagger in hand and confidently boomed, “It’s green, isn’t it?”

It certainly was now. He thought to himself and opened his mouth to reply but Iris barreled on.

“Which is a tad cliche, but you wear green often and it suits you without clashing with your hair.” She continued, more so to herself as she tilted her head and observed him. “You tend to go for the darker greens, but I think sage would look really nice on you too.”

Both of Eris’s brows went up. “Is that so?”

Iris hummed, her free hand casually reaching out to touch his arm. “Celadon would match well too. It’s just a shade away from sage but just as nice.”

Eris only watched her hand touch the fabric of his shirt and held very still. “Would you like input in my wardrobe, wife?”

Realizing she was still touching him, Iris flushed lightly and pulled back. “How about some nice fluffy skirts?”

“I’m afraid you’d get jealous of how spectacular my legs would look.” he said and grinned when she laughed.

“I wish I had the right word to describe you.” she said with a shake of her head.

“Handsome? Delightful? Wonderful?” he offered. “In case you missed it the first time I said it but, once again, handsome?”

She scrunched her nose in mock distaste and said, “Obnoxious is what I would go with. Maybe nauseating.”

Slowly, with each quip, they tried to build a routine.

And Eris, who was not used to having someone be a constant presence around him was slightly unsettled.

Especially because the more time they spent together, the worse his reactions to her were getting. It was getting harder and harder for him to resist her even if all she did was stand next to him.

Each day passed in a blur, until a week and then two were gone before he knew it. A week and then another, of exploration, of questions, of training, and every single thing Eris could think of to include in their day-to-day. Even though he needed to plan it well to maneuver everything without his father detecting it, Iris was a constant companion by his side every day when it was suitable. It was an ache he didn’t realize he was feeling that was soothed. He was exhausted but it felt good. Being around her felt good.

And it scared the shit out of him. Especially whenever he was in the same room as his father. Any urges he felt were dimmed down very quickly with the slight panic of just thinking about Iris near his father.

In turn, Iris tried to be stealthy about her observations of Eris as they went about their day but Eris was always aware of how she watched him. He tried not to let it unnerve him but also wasn’t exactly sure what to do about it. He aimed to take his mother’s advice and show Iris kindness each day. The problem was, he wasn’t exactly sure if he was doing it right.

Her threats continued, though half-hearted. His inappropriateness was the response, also half-hearted. It seemed to be the easiest way for them to navigate whatever this was.

Eris had never requested so many flowers in his life; Elain outdid herself each time with her bouquets knowing he would only trust her with flowers. The last thing he needed was for his father to find out he went out and bought his wife flowers.

Iris had adjusted to their expected roles better than he had anticipated. Whenever they stepped out of their room, she became the demur, adoring wife and Eris tried not to let it fuck with his mind. Especially whenever she touched him.

And gods, she touched him so much now. It was subtle touches, almost mindlessly but he never failed to notice that she always hesitated just for a fraction of a second then did it anyway. As though convincing herself it was allowed, and it was — it was very much allowed. Even if Eris was on the verge of a constant meltdown.

He didn’t touch her as often. For his own sanity but also because she still to this moment, eyed his hands warily. Even when they started training, her eyes always drifted to his hands.

It was why Eris didn’t mind it that he hadn’t tasted her lips yet. He kept reminding himself that it was one step at a time. Because apparently, making it work didn’t include kissing.

This all didn’t stop them from having...difficult moments.

A few days before, he had a terrible reaction when she had accidentally brushed up against his back in passing and Eris had flinched so hard, she had jumped back several feet from him.

“Don’t.” His snarl slipping from his lips quicker than he could leash it, the command a mirror of the one she had given him their first night together.

Iris had stood, taken aback and a beat of tense silence passed between them. “I’m sorry.” she said quietly, her brows furrowed. “I didn’t realize it still bothered you.”

It had taken him a minute before he swallowed, hating the way she stood away from him so rigidly. “Just because it seems healed doesn’t mean it doesn’t bother me.”

“You sleep and walk around shirtless...I assumed you didn’t have any issues —”

“I don’t like people to approach me from behind too closely and I like to air it out,” he replied curtly and rolled his shoulders back. “I’ve also been used to sleeping alone.”

Instinct had told him she wouldn‘t touch his back any of the times he slept shirtless and only because Eris knew she still hesitated to get too close to him, he didn’t bother with shirts. Her expression had flattened at his tone but she kept her voice even, watching his expression.

“You’re telling me no one has ever touched your back?”

“If you’re wondering about previous lovers, they usually had their hands occupied elsewhere.” he snipped then narrowed his eyes, trying not to let a sneer find its way to his face. “Do not pity me for a single moment.”

Iris had only lifted her chin and met his near-sneer with a scowl. “I expect the same from you.”

The rest of that day had been spent in silence, even as they explored. Both of them feeling too awkward to meet in the middle.

It also didn’t help when that same night, Iris had walked in on Eris bathing while doing other things and slammed the door shut with a loud gasp. She had only flushed angrily at him and refused to meet his gaze when he slipped into their bed afterward.

He had desperately tried not to laugh as he was shameless; a male had needs and his wife was fucken beautiful. But Eris, of course, had only said the stupidest thing he could think of.

“To make it very clear, I was definitely thinking about you, wife.”

Which only caused Iris to scoot further away from him and reply, “Go die. Don’t think about me that way.”

“Would you rather I thought of someone else then?” he teased, and she shot him a glare.

“I’m sure you’ve had others you can think about.”

Eris shrugged and crossed his arms, looking at her. “Yes. But none of them are my wife. Surely you wouldn’t want your husband to think of others while pleasuring himself?”

He slowly smirked when she had only pursed her lips and ignored his question. “I assume you’ve had needs as well, wife. I’d be happy to assist you with them at any time.”

“No, thank you.” she spat, flushing deeply and Eris chuckled in the silence that followed her response — until she looked over her shoulder and asked an unexpected question.

“Will you...find relief with others? If I...am not comfortable yet?”

Eris had blanked as she blushed and looked away, quickly adding, “It wouldn’t be fair for me to deny you and then expect you not to find it elsewhere.”

He had stared at her in a long enough silence, that it forced her to look at him once more.

“I thought we were going to make this work.” he said tightly, and Iris blinked.

“...Yes.”

“I don’t count infidelity as making it work. Do you?”

Iris swallowed and looked away again, flushing. “No.”

“Good,” he said simply then rolled his shoulders back. “I’m not a male interested in anyone but my wife, even if my wife isn’t interested in me yet. I will wait until you are comfortable.”

Color had bloomed on Iris’s cheeks and she’d stolen one more glance at him before turning away once more, refusing to respond, and Eris had to hold back a grin.

And every day after, they found ways to bridge the gap between them.

Iris joined him and his mother for tea almost every morning and he always felt the strangest sensation watching his mother laugh alongside Iris. He couldn’t find the right word to describe it — didn’t know if he could whenever he watched the two of them bond, but it made his heart swell.

Eris was pleasantly surprised when two weeks later, and after he worked with her on the basics for her self-defense, his wife had indeed kicked his ass hard enough that he was the one on his back in the training room.

She grinned as she stood over him, her dagger at his throat and Eris desperately tried not to get a hard-on.

“Beat you.”

“Your grip on the dagger is getting better.” he said to her slowly, his eyes cataloging every inch of her in fitted training clothes. “I see your stance has improved as well.”

“You have a big mouth but at least you're a decent teacher.” she said with a chuckle and pulled back so he could get up, twirling the dagger in her hand.

But Eris wasn’t so sure he was decent about anything. Especially when all he could think about was having her on her back and doing very indecent things to his one and only student.

“Next time, I’d like to see you try to disarm me more quickly. But good job.” he said with a small proud smile, dusting his training leathers and Iris grinned at the praise. “It seems that the imbecile who stole kisses from you gave you some acceptable pointers in between the fondling.”

Iris’s expression flattened. “You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

“I will have him beheaded if you’d just tell me his name.” Eris said sweetly and Iris snorted, shoving him back.

“No, you won’t because I will not tell you anything. He didn’t do anything wrong.”

“He kissed my wife.”

“Before she was your wife.”

“Yes, but now you are the future high lord’s wife. I will not have a wife fondler in my court.” Eris added and Iris huffed a laugh.

“How do you know you haven't met him already? What if he’s been working with you this whole time knowing he’s fondled your wife?” she said with an eye roll. “You’re ridiculous.”

Eris paused and narrowed his eyes at her as she pursed her lips, holding back another laugh.

“Do I need to fight for my honor then, wife?”

“Your honor?”

“Yes. You won’t tell me the wife fondler’s name. I will fight for it and win back my respect.”

“You’re losing respect by the second the more you ask about him.”

Eris put a hand over his heart and gave her a once-over. “I am the son of a high lord.”

Sheathing her dagger, Iris gave him a saccharine smile and said as she told him once before, “Kiss my ass.”

Eris chuckled. “A few training sessions and you’ve gotten cocky. I’d like to see you try without the dagger then.”

“You just want me to get you on your back again, don’t you?” she taunted with a smirk that had Eris grinning. “Right where you belong.”

“What if I want to get you on your back?”

“We both know by now that’s not how it would go.”

Eris smirked and tried not to let his delight show at the slight flush in her cheeks that had nothing to do with their workout.

“I’m very curious to know how you think it would go.” he said seductively. “How long are you going to keep resisting my charms?”

Iris pursed her lips and raised a brow. “Funny how you think there is much to resist.”

Eris tutted as they stood opposite each other, and he gave her another slow once-over. “We’re two sides of the same miserable coin so don’t you lie to me. The least we can do is fuck it out, little gazelle.”

Iris returned the once over with one of her own before she met his gaze and firmly said, “Don’t ask for things you won’t survive, husband.”

“I’ve always liked a challenge, wife.”

Iris’s brow raised in challenge. “You would barely survive a kiss.”

“Is it the witchcraft or poison on your lips that’ll do me in?” he asked with a lazy grin and Iris rolled her eyes, though the corner of her mouth ticked up.

“It would be the knife I so casually slip into your chest if you took a kiss before I gave it.”

“And when will you give me one, wife?” he teased, and she shrugged nonchalantly.

“Maybe today. Maybe tomorrow.” she replied airily. “When I feel like it, I suppose.”

And oh, Iris would never admit it to him at the moment, but she definitely felt like it. All this time she shared a bed with this male and had started to share so much with him...except a kiss. By her request, of course.

Which she was deeply regretting because now, all Iris felt was pressure. An insane amount of pressure that sat on her chest daily, that squeezed when she looked at him and Iris found herself looking at him a lot.

He chuckled at her comment, waving her off then rubbed his cheek, at the scruff gracing his face and Iris wondered if he had any idea what the light beard was doing to her. He seemed to have forgotten about it completely.

“I like my odds with maybe.” he said with a wink and shoved his shoulder into hers gently.

Iris pursed her lips then shoved him right back but knew he didn’t miss the way she kept eyeing him, her gaze constantly on his face.

“Is there something you would like to say?” he teased again, and Iris rolled her eyes, pushing past him.

“There are a few things I’d like to say but I am a lady.”

“A lady with one of the filthiest mouths I’ve ever seen.” Eris said with a snort. “I have been bamboozled.”

“Bamboozled?” she asked, putting a hand over her heart as a coy smile found its way to her lips. “Are you flirting with me, husband?”

Eris gave her a smirk. “It only took for me to admit being fooled that you realized? I need to work on my game then.”

“Yes, you do. You’re terrible.”

And the two shared a small, shy smile as they made their way out of the private training room and back to their bedroom.

Since their little heart-to-heart, things seemed to be different but they were both still somewhat cautious with each other. Iris still scowled in his general direction at some of the nonsense he said, and though the pillow barricade was getting shorter, it still stood proudly between them.

A flush blossomed on her cheeks as Iris recalled yesterday morning when she woke up to find their hands inches away from each other.

They still didn’t know what to make of the other.

But...he seemed to be trying. And so, she tried as well.

Each morning, they would venture out somewhere different in the Autumn Court, places she had never seen though she had been born and raised in it. Eris included her in almost everything and watching him work had been fascinating. The way everything was done in plain sight of Beron and yet...the High Lord knew nothing of the system Eris had built that functioned without him.

The day he introduced her to a few select people he valued above everyone else was one that filled her with pride.

“This is Nevien, the only healer I trust. She’s patched me up more times than I care to admit.” Eris had said when introducing the older female. Iris had noted his fond smile towards her as the healer smiled back. “Nevien, please note you might see me more often these days as I’m going to start training my wife. She has the tendency to try and stab me.” Nevien had only laughed as Iris rolled her eyes.

Later that same day, he introduced her to some of his closer sentries she had seen around.

“These are Oren, Mikel, and Serphan — three of my generals who oversee the workings of my legion and personal court within our territory. I trust them with my life.” he explained, and Iris nodded her greeting with a smile — until Eris turned to his generals and continued with, “Friends, if I am murdered, please put Iris on trial first as she threatens me with death several times a day. I annoy her enough that she might actually do it.”

Her expression had flattened before shooting Eris a glare but he only smirked as his men held back smiles.

“See? Murder is in her eyes.”

“Keep talking, it won’t only be in my eyes.” she had muttered. He had only grinned in that infuriating way of his while his companions laughed.

So his most trusted men watched her. His most trusted healer started meeting with her. He trained her himself and Iris had never been so blissfully busy, it made her heart burst. She was finding purpose.

Most importantly, he made time with her every single day to spend away from the court. Even if it wasn’t far, even if it was just in the fields watching her as she ran around with the hounds, he took her.

They avoided his father. They avoided her father. They avoided any outside factors that could sour the mood between them.

They spent every night with each other and when they weren’t exhausted, they spent it doing mindless activities together. The other night, he had sat opposite her while playing cards and Iris couldn’t take her eyes off him. She watched how at ease he was with her, his eyes focused on his cards while biting his lip. Or at least his gaze had been focused on the cards, — until he snapped his eyes to hers and he sniffed the air.

“Interesting development.” he said, and Iris narrowed her eyes at the stupid smirk on his face.

“What development is that?”

“I didn’t realize playing cards turned you on, wife.” he said with a Cheshire cat smile and Iris flushed deeply.

“Oh yes, cards are one of my fetishes.” she said dryly and forced herself to roll her eyes, but Eris’s smile only widened.

She froze, watching him calmly put down his cards and with a predatory gleam in his eyes, Eris moved closer and closer until he leaned over her just slightly so, a knowing look in his eyes. “If that’s the case, I think we can play a different game.”

Iris leaned back from him, her cards hugged to her chest, as if hoping he couldn’t hear how loudly it was beating. “And what game would that be?” she asked, completely distracted by the way his scent seemed to flood her senses.

“Why, strip poker, of course.” he said, leaning in further until he hovered close enough to her face and they shared a breath. “If playing cards makes you feel this excited, it seems logical stripping should come next.”

Iris huffed out a laugh, even as her blush gave her away, and shoved his head back with her palm. “Just say you want me naked and stop beating around the bush.”

Eris snorted and slowly backed away, to where he lay across from her and picked up his cards again. “I don’t think I’ve beat around the bush about that for one moment, wife.” he said and then gave her a wink. “Whenever you’re ready, I’ll only let you beg for it a little.”

“What makes you think I’ll beg at all?” she asked more haughty than she felt.

And the look he had given her set her whole body aflame. “We shall see, won’t we?” he said softly, and Iris had a much more difficult time paying attention to her cards after that.

As time started to pass, Iris felt how her feelings towards him shifted from wary to complicated to...somewhat ease. He didn’t push her or invade her space. He taunted her, of course, but never anything more and she found...she stopped minding the taunts so much.

One morning at breakfast, he had left her a simple gift box on their table and when Iris opened it to find a dagger, a well of emotion had surged in her body so fiercely, it almost made her cry. The same dagger was now sheathed to her thigh and Iris had to school herself at the time not to launch herself at him as he only said, “Consider it a late wedding gift.”

It was a beautiful dagger with a gold hilt, light enough it didn’t hold her back but sharp enough to slice off an arm.

And this had changed everything for Iris. Because it was an olive branch. A sign of trust. She had almost kissed him then. She found herself almost kissing him in quite a few situations.

She had even started to feel bolder with her nightclothes, choosing ones more comfortable though not too revealing. And with the way he cataloged each set, she might as well have been naked.

It was deeply unfortunate that he was very attractive, and she was, unfortunately, becoming attracted to him. Unfortunate that there always seemed to be a pull between them and Iris felt her walls getting lower and lower around him. Felt herself starting to like him and it scared the living daylights out of her enough that she always hesitated.

She watched him as they now walked down the mostly empty hall, nodding as certain staff passed. Iris observed him and knew if she didn’t say something soon, she’d end up doing something stupid, like shove him against the wall and kiss him how she desperately wanted to.

Clearing her throat, she stole a glance at him and quietly said, “I’m excited to visit Elain and Lucien tomorrow.”

Eris’s eyes met hers for a moment and the corner of his mouth ticked up. “So am I. They’re very excited to meet you.”

She fiddled with the hem of her shirt for a moment before speaking. “You told me you can see us getting along before...that’s still the case now, right?”

Eris blinked then paused in his steps, causing Iris to almost collide into him. He turned and gave her a curious look. “Yes, of course. Are you...nervous?”

Iris scoffed, though her cheeks heated. “Of course, I’m nervous! They’re the only family you like aside from your mother and I’m still trying to find time to spend with her.” she said in a quick breath then added quietly, “I want them to like me.”

Eris’s brows went up in surprise then he chuckled. “I can assure you, they’re going to like you very much.” he said. “Probably more than they like me.”

Iris pursed her lips, holding back a small smile then cleared her throat again as they started walking once more. “Well, that much can be expected. I am nicer than you.”

Eris rolled his eyes, knocking into her shoulder gently. “So you say. Yet, I am the one getting threats on a daily basis from someone.”

Iris crossed her arms and knocked her shoulder back into him. “Are you saying they’re undeserved?”

“I am saying for someone so nice, you have quite the violent tendencies.”

“That mouth of yours can inspire homicidal tendencies in just about anyone so really, are you surprised?” she replied with a pointed look and Eris blinked at her then tilted his head back with a laugh.

Iris’s lips twitched, watching the way his face changed with the laugh. How open he seemed. How unburdened. She liked when he laughed. She liked it a lot.

So she added, “One could argue you inspire those homicidal tendencies just by standing there and breathing but I don’t want to give you too much credit.”

“Oh the way you are with your words, wife.” he said with a shake of his head, one of the more genuine smiles on his face. “I’m so incredibly flattered.”

Iris looked down with a small smile, her cheeks reddening just so at his words, at his gaze on her. Only when he gently brushed his fingers against hers at her side did she look up again.

“I know going to the Day Court is a big deal for you.” he said quietly. “Your mother was originally from there, yes?”

Iris looked at him in surprise. She had mentioned that small detail to him in passing, through one of their random conversations. A warm feeling spread through her chest that he remembered.

“Yes, she was.” she said, a sad smile finding its way to her lips. “I’ve always wanted to visit but...he never allowed it.” Iris looked at Eris, brushing back a strand of hair that fell loose from her braid. “I’ve always heard it’s very beautiful. Do Elain and Lucien live in the city itself?”

“They live on the outskirts, closer to the countryside. But you can see the city from their home.” he replied then chuckled. “It is definitely a very beautiful place, but a little too warm for me. I am a bit biased to our crisp and airy weather.”

Iris laughed softly. “That makes sense, I suppose.” She glanced at him once then licked her lips before asking, “Do — do you think we could visit separately one day and explore the city?”

She didn’t miss the look in his eyes at her question.

Iris had grown up learning to expect no to any of her requests — just because her father had the power to do so. But Eris hadn’t said it once. Hadn’t scoffed at a single thing she asked for or about. So she tried to word her questions better, word them in a way that didn’t make him feel doubtful of her. He certainly tried for her and she wanted to keep trying to expect the better of him.

“Helion has been generous enough to grant me permission to visit Lucien at any time so I don’t see why not. I can send in a formal request for the two of us at some point.”

“Yeah?” she asked and her smile widened. “Do you think we’d be able to stay overnight too?”

Eris’s brows shot up and then he gave her a smirk that instantly had her regretting her question. “You’d have to share a bed with me in a new location. However will you be able to handle it, wife?” he asked in a voice too sinful to be used in a public setting. “I’m afraid we’ll be kicked out with how indecent you’ll be with me. How will I protect my modesty?”

Iris let out a cackle of a laugh even as her cheeks heated once more. “Eris Vanserra and the word modesty do not go together. Please don’t embarrass yourself with such lies.”

“That’s quite mean, wife. I won’t let you ravish me close enough to traumatize my brother if you’re not nice to me.”

“No, thank you. I will bunk with Elain and you can bunk with Lucien. The two of you can relive your cherished brotherly memories of sharing a space and protect your precious modesty.”

Eris snorted. “You think I shared a space with anyone? Please.”

“A high-maintenance princess through and through.” she said with a grin and felt his soft laugh skate down her spine.

“But of course, I can’t have you lusting after a heathen.”

“Your mistake is you think I’m lusting after you at all.”

Eris gave her a knowing look. “Oh the lies you tell, wife.”

Iris rolled her eyes. “Enough about you, princess.” she said with a small smile when his mouth formed a very small pout. “Lucien’s the only one of your brothers that surprisingly hasn’t tried to kill you, right?”

Eris waved a hand with a good-natured shrug. “I wouldn’t say never but definitely less than the others.”

Iris raised a brow, lowering her voice, and walked closer to him as people passed them in the mostly empty hall. “So that’s why he’s your favorite.”

“I’m his favorite.” he corrected. “I tolerate them all just fine.”

“It makes sense that you would choose him. He is the most handsome of you.” She said with a smirk that widened at the outrage on his face as he gaped at her.

“You think Lucien is more handsome than I am?”

“You don’t?” She asked with an innocent blink.

“Even with his metal eye?” he asked in amusement and Iris shrugged then gave an exaggerated dreamy sigh.

“Especially with the eye.” she said and fought the smile at Eris’s expression. “It definitely makes him more dashing.”

“You don’t even know Lucien.” he muttered childishly, his eyes narrowed.

“Everyone knows Lucien.” she said, biting back the grin threatening to burst out of her at his expression. “Before he was mated, the Seventh son of Beron was very well-liked by many females. Quite a few males too.”

Eris narrowed his eyes on her.

Iris smiled back innocently.

He scoffed and knocked into her shoulder gently. “I’ll allow your momentary lapse in judgment. Only because I know what’s really in your heart, wife.”

Iris rolled her eyes again, flicking his arm lightly. “Oh do tell, husband dear. What is in my heart?”

“Why, how could it be anyone else but me, little gazelle?” He replied with a smug smile and tapped over his heart. “I’m sitting right in there, warming it all up.”

It was Iris’s turn to let out a snort. “I thought you wanted to worm your way under my dresses?”

“I’m great at multitasking. I want to be under your dress, in your heart, and I already know I’m in your head with how often you think about me.”

She let out a laugh and the corner of Eris’s mouth curved up. “You are so full of yourself, how does your body manage to carry that fat head of yours?”

“I have incredible thighs to hold up my weight.”

The laugh died in her throat as Eris’s head shot up and faster than Iris could comprehend, he had her cornered against the wall, his hand lightly wrapped around her throat.

“Play along.” he whispered.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Wicked Games 3

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: non/dubcon, cheating, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: Steve Rogers

Summary: you had a one night stand. Or did you?

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

A week passes in a tense slog. Barrett continues his pandering penance and you wallow in irritation. You want to put it behind you. You want to get past it but every time you do, it just happens again.

If this was the first time, it would be easy but you’ve lost count of all the times you’ve had this fight. 

Your menial office work does little to distract. It only allows you to think about all the bullshit. The way Barrett dismisses everything you do and has to list of everything you don’t. The way he can’t see his own flaws or how you’ve never once rubbed his nose in them like a dog.  

Is it passive or weak or just acceptance? You can’t say. You just always put up with it.  It’s just easier not to make an issue of every little thing. Problem is, now it’s a big thing. 

When you come home, you’re worn out but you still have work to do. Dishes, tidying, cooking. Even your weekends don’t allow you must rest. You need to sort through the bills and go get groceries. All along the way, he’s in the way. You’re not sure he’s trying to help, more so trying to force his way to forgiveness. 

You grab a bundle of reusable shopping bags from the cupboard overflowing with them. It only took about a hundred of the things to start remembering to take them with you.  

As you shut the cupboard, Barrett’s on the other side of the oven. Watching and waiting. He’d be a lot more help if you didn’t have to tell him what to do. You forgot a mug and to him, that’s high crime, but he can’t remember to pay the power bill without six texts on the due date. 

“So... what’s going on today?” He smiles. 

It used to be that that smile made you melt. It would make all your troubles flutter away like butterflies. Now it’s just another irk. 

“Groceries.” You wave the fistful of bags. 

“Oh, cool, want me to come?” 

You nearly scoff. Every weekend you ask and every weekend he’s too busy. His pals want him to jam in their garage band or go fishing down at some dirty river. Another tick on the wrong side of the Pros-Cons list. 

“Sure,” you shrug. It’s easier to just let him come along. You don’t need another argument and you could use the extra hands. 

You shove the bags into the folded shopping cart and put your shoes on. He toddles behind like a lost child. You’re repress a glare as you grab your keys and purse. You’re going to have to talk this out sooner than later our you’re really going to hate him. 

He follows you out to the bus stop and you wait in silence. You had a car but it broke down last year. Ever since, he gets a ride off his coworkers or friends and you flash your bus pass. It’s cheaper than leasing a car, even a used one. 

You don’t know what stresses you out more; thinking about all the stuff he does or just thinking about your life. You get on the bus and sit near the back. He reaches over to grab your hand. You wince but don’t pull away. 

“Nice day,” he says. 

“Mhmm,” you grumble. 

His attempt at small talk doesn’t go much further. You get off at your stop and walk the block to the grocery store. You unfold your shopping cart and pull out your list. Barrett grabs a bag of gummy bears and dumps them in the cart. 

“Those aren’t on the list,” you say. 

“I know but it’ll be a nice treat for later. We’ll have some tonight after dinner.” 

“Oh, alright.” 

You factor in the extra cost and mentally cross off the avocado from the list. You can go without. You roll through the produce section and work your way down the list. Barrett trails behind you. 

You stop in the cereal aisle to grab a bag of oatmeal. As you stand, you flinch and cry out at a surprise peck on your cheek. Barrett puts his arm around your shoulder as he presses his lips against you. 

“What are you doing?” You ask. 

“Baby, giving you a kiss.” You look at him and he grins, “I miss you. I love you. I’m tryna be better, honey.” 

“In the grocery store?” You challenge. 

“It’s cute.” 

“Mm, it’s... let’s wait ‘til we get outta here. It’s starting to get busy.” You glance around at the other customers, hoping none of them noticed his little act. “How about you go grab some drumsticks? Flyer says they’re on sale.” 

“Oh, I can do that. Be right back!” He proclaims. 

He shuffles off and you shake your head and turn back to the shelves. The store brand on discount is all out. You hiss in disappointment. You search the rest of the selection. That’s the cheapest on the shelf and you really can’t stretch the extra dollar. 

You look up at the overstock along the top. It’s right up there but you’re just too short to reach. You give a poor attempt then stand flat on your feet. You peer up and down the aisle. You could find an employee. 

“Need some help?”  

You turn to face the stranger and give a start. They aren’t so strange after all. You know him. Well, not know-know him. Everyone in the city knows Steve Rogers, the Captain America. 

“Uhhh...” 

“What’s your brand?” He asks. “They don’t run restock until before closing. I usually come then, less busy but I got... ha, sorry, I’m rambling. What can I grab for you?” 

You lick your dry lips and glance at the shelf. You appreciate the help but telling Captain America that you need the cheapest bag on the shelf isn’t exactly dignified. You point to the price tag on the shelf and he reaches on his toes to grab the edge of the box on the top. He wiggles out a bag and stands flat. 

“Here,” he offers it with a handsome smile. “You know, it’s made at the same factory as the regular brand.” He taps the back of the bag, “exact same address. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re from the same lot.” 

“Oh, well, er... thanks,” you take the oats and put them in your cart. 

“No problem. Sometimes being a hero isn’t very glorious. Sometimes it’s just reaching the top shelf.” 

You force a chuckle. You’re sure the Cap’s life is all sunshine and rainbows. Must be a real ego boost to help the little people. 

“Well, I appreciate it, Captain.” 

“Steve,” he smirks and stares. Your lower your brows and look behind you. Is he looking at someone else? 

“Oh, of course. I should go find my husband.” You roll around him and try to shake off the awkward encounter. You look down at your list as you stop at the end of the aisle. 

“Hope he’s not lost...” Steve calls after you. He says your name and you crane to look at him. You meet his gaze and blanch. He turns and struts off without another word. 

You turn back to your path and slowly leave the aisle. How did he know your name? You replay the interaction and try to recall giving it but you can’t. Well, you’re not exactly thinking straight right now. It’s nothing. You’re just stressed. 

[imagineredwood]

Ok but the real question is who would YOU want to be chased by. Let us into your sexy kinky little brain miss redwood

This is all consenting by the way 💕 Please tell me if there’s tags I should put this under for triggers please

My personal #1 choice is Angel. He’s tall and his legs are so long I feel like he’ll catch up so fast you don’t stand a chance which is scarier 🤭 Then I just think about how cocky and taunting he’d be. “Better run faster, baby. I’m right behind you.” “Aw, are you getting tired?” Calling you names, some sweet, some…not. I can imagine him cooing at you when he gets too close and sees you start to panic a little when you look back 🥺 “I won’t hurt you too bad baby, just let me catch you. You must be so tired” He’d be the type to sometimes not even really run, just walk fast because he knows he’ll catch you anyway. When he gets right on your heels he might even let you get away just to keep the chase going. Also what about his rings glittering in the moonlight if it’s dark The way he’d pin you down when he finally has enough and catches you 😮‍💨 he’ll have you laying on the floor getting you all dirty or maybe against a tree, his ringed hand pressing your cheek into the bark to keep you still.

But I have reasons for the others too 🧠 Angel is just the loml 🥰 I think Coco would be terrifying. Quiet and sneaky, using his skills as a sniper against you. Might even sneak up ahead of where he knows you’ll go just to scare you into another direction. He’ll wear all black and sometimes he just looks like a shadow. Just like Angel when he finally cuts the shit and catches you.

Bishop would be another slow one, stalking you more than chasing. He’ll smoke while he does it. Doesn’t care that you can see then smoke or end burning that can give his away. Also very taunting. “Are those legs getting tired, pretty girl? I can see they are.”

EZ puts in work. He does cardio and has endurance. I think he’d be the type to actually chase you, makes it a little lighter than the others, he laughs while he runs after you. Chases you to a specific area where he already has a soft thick blanket laid out for where he’ll take you down safely.

Jax I think would be another hunter type. Cocky and makes little jokes, but his heart is pounding and he teases you making sure you know you’re not gonna get away from him 😓

[adoresmiles]

His Concealed Obsession.

Chapter Four

Not me with another update! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and don’t forget to leave feedback. You guys are keeping me going through my depression right now. Love all 🫶🏽

Tags: @violetmuses @onlyrealjoy @unicorndelulu @liatreads @sunrisesfromthewest @deja-r @idontknowwhak @jacobscipioswoman @armandoaretasfc @aaronhotchnerlover @simpledopeme @slashervalley @nobodygetsza @nelo0wesker @peaxhygirl

Kanani

“This is a really nice place that you have here Nani.”

“I could have sworn you been here. Didn’t you help and uncle mucus help me move in?”

“Your uncle Marcus did , Mike was out doing something with Rita that day.”

“Oh yeah I remember now , trying to figure out who shot you . Did you ever find out who and why they did it ?”

Kanani asked him as she rest her body against her kitchen counter. Mike begin coughing as her father just laughed. She was confused on what was funny , she knew the situation was touchy since KP and their dad had tagged along with Marcus , Mike and AMMO . When they got back , nobody had mentioned anything about the mission so Kanani never brought it up until now. She was genuinely concerned about the outcome.

“I didn’t know a simple question could trigger someone to choke on their own spit.”

“It just caught me off guard that’s all. But yes I did end up catching the person who attempted to kill me.”

“Twice, your son tried to kill you twice Mike.”

“Your son tried to kill you?! Wow he didn’t even succeed at that. What did you do to him ?”

“Since when you become an investigator?”

“My mom is a dispatcher it’s in my blood. Anyways whatever you did to your son, you deserved it.”

“Damn baby girl that’s cold. Mike had a job to do just you and I both , you can’t let your personal feelings get in the way of that.”

“You’re right and I agree with you , but his son almost took him out twice, not once but twice and he damn near got lucky with them too.”

“Well Nani I ended up putting his mother in prison.”

“Oh that’s low , I would want to kill you too!”

“Really Nani?”

“Yup! Dad if you were to put my mother and Jax mother in prison , I’m killing you. There’s no way in hell you’re going to put my mom behind bars. You could have placed her on probation or something but you put his mom behind bars. Yeah I wouldn’t even think twice about putting you in a body bag.”

“Good to know that we will need to place on the watch list.Mike please remind me to place my child on the watch list.”

“I’m just saying , if you ever think about putting my mother and Jax mom behind bars I am going to kill you. I won’t even hesitate to kill you either uncle Mike. So snitch if you want to.”

“I don’t got anything to do with this. This is between you and your bald headed father.”

“If you didn’t put your son mother behind bars we wouldn’t be having this conversation in the first place. In fact if you guys didn’t just randomly showed up , the conversation wouldn’t have even taken place. But with me being smart as hell , you guys want to ask me questions about yesterday shooting . So stop beating around the bush and start the interrogation process.”

“So in your own words what happened yesterday?”

"Umm I don't know , we were out shopping and then I went outside to call back KP and next thing you know I'm tackled down to the ground by some random man in Miami while bullets were flying."

"Are you sure that's all?"

"Yup , that is all."

"Kanani Souline , this is a serious matter. You almost lost your damn life out there girl."

"Your best friend told us that there was a guy following you guys yesterday.”

“Now that is true , some guy was at the store and when we went to check out he was no longer there.”

“How did he look?”

“Somewhat tall , my complexion of not a little bit darker, really gorgeous colored eyes and a low mini Afro. Oh he had zero tattoos too as well.”

“That’s exactly what the other two females said too. Don’t say anything but this is the same guy your mom took a 911 call from a couple of years back.”

“About the young girl?”

“Yup that exact one. We’re going go ahead and arrest him tonight. KP saw him this morning doing the same thing but at the beach. He didn’t try anything with you and friend right ?”

“He just kept staring at us , didn’t get close to us.”

“Good. Listen Kanani , I really need you to be on your toes okay? Your neighbor just got cold blooded murdered , you were being followed and almost died yesterday. Your mother and I are not trying to burry you under the ground yet.”

“He has a good point Kanani. I can’t be sitting at a funeral with Marcus crying on my shoulder like he did at your graduation.”

“Yeah I heard him from the stage , uncle Marcus have to get his emotions in check.”

“Trust me , we all do and that’s part of the reason why we left him back the house. He doesn’t know that you almost got shot yesterday, but he does know about your neighbor.”

“Yesterday events will have him snotty nose crying in the middle of my living room.”

“We don’t need- I just know these kids aren’t knocking on my door again. I’ll be back, you guys can grab you some snacks.”

The two men watched as Kanani jogged out of the kitchen to answer the door. As she was chatting to the unknown person at the door , they both looked over at with raised eyebrows before Daniel walked over to the table and search through the flowers. Unbeknownst to them Kanani was as standing behind the wall as she listen their conversation.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you man.”

“I’m just being curious on who sent my daughter flowers. They sent her favorite flowers at that as well.”

“Maybe she bought them herself, you know my niece is big on self love. You and storm made sure she loved herself more than anyone else.”

“You right she could have did that but she didn’t . I know she didn’t because they are still in the delivery vase. Kanani has her own vases that she uses when she gets flowers. Trust me I know my child Mike.”

“Well did you see the necklace around her neck?”

“Of course I did but I didn’t want to say anything to make it obvious.”

“You sure she doesn’t have a boyfriend ?”

“If she did , she would have told the boys about it by now. Hell even Storm would have known before m-"

“Aww now look at what I walked into . My own dad looking through my stuff while his best friend sits and watch.”

“I told him not to do it.”

“Why are you looking through my things?”

“I wasn’t looking through your things. I was looking for the key that I left over here last week.”

“You wasn’t even home last week dad. Mom and you were on your way to Greece for your wedding anniversary.”

“Damn she got you right there.”

“I was just being curious on who bought you these flowers . They’re freshly picked and you never leave them in the vases.”

“Well all you had to do was just dad I would have told you. But no you wanted to be sneaky and go snooping around.”

“I’m not trying to get my head chewed the hell off by you today. So I’m just going to ask you this question, where did you get that necklace from?”

“Okay just like this gift bag , this necklace was a gift.”

“A gift from who? Because it looks madly familiar.”

“Familiar how?”

“My son has the exact same necklace Kanani. The same letter , chain length and everything. Are you sure that the motorcyclist wasn’t my son.”

“How would I know? I don’t even know how your looks. Let alone I never even met your son Mike.”

“Kanani there’s no need for you to get defensive.”

“You shouldn’t be talking right now. Especially when you were snooping around in my house. Do you two not trust me or something?”

“When you put it in that way , to an extent there’s a lack of trust. Your neighbor got murdered, you got followed and then you got shot at. You’re getting flowers and gifts from an unknown person that nobody knows about. Hell for all I know you could be wearing Mike son chain!”

“I’m a grown ass women! I don’t have to tell you about my personal life. I’m not like Jaxon who tells you every little detail of his life. You did this to KP and I refuse to be your next victim.”

“I think that’s enough Nani , you don’t want to say anything that you could regret.”

“No because he doesn’t see that whenever he does shit like this it leaves in impact on us. KP recently got his locks changed because he caught you snooping around in his own house twice . You questioned him on his love life . Hell you just did that today and you turn around say that you don’t trust me.”

“My relationship with you and KP are completely different and more complicated than Jax and I relationship.”

“You and Jax are close because he tells you every single detail that does on in his life. You two have no boundaries. KP and I have boundaries, there’s things we want you to know and things that we feel like you shouldn’t know.”

“If I’m dating someone and if he’s getting me something then that’s my business. Nobody but mine and you should respect. You don’t see mom come over , snooping around and asking me questions about my personal life and my whereabouts. She trust me and respect my boundaries.”

“That’s your mother not m-"

“Your perception of me is only a reflection of you. You and uncle Mike can escort yourselves out.”

[lucidlivi]

Chosen For Pleasure (XIV)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

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I hid a quote in here from one of my favorite tv shows, besides supernatural of course... see if you can catch it! If you can, let's be best friends!

gun violence and mental illness talk at the end of this chapter, please read with caution if it is triggering to you in any way.... if you are struggling with mental health, please reach out! I love you and I'm happy you're here!

"is this really necessary?" I asked Jensen, my eyes befalling the large man in a suit standing next to him.

"yes, until they catch Riley, I'm not risking your safety... besides Mark's a professional, he knows how to be discreet, you won't even know he's around." Jensen said kissing my cheek.

I highly doubt that.

A big burley security man following my every movement.... yeah they'll never see him coming.

I sighed deeply, knowing I'd never be able to talk Jensen out of it.

I stood on my tippy toes connecting his lips with mine. It was a short brief kiss, but it was all I needed to get my heart racing.

"I should go, don't want to be late for my first day as Chief Editor." I said leaning in to Jensen's warm embrace.

"I'll pick you up after work, we have some things to discuss."

"things to discuss, what sort of things?"

"you never answered my question." Jensen smirks knowingly before departing.

It's been a hectic few days, my mind has been on overload. I'm lucky I even remembered to put pants on today. Of course I haven't been able to think about Jensen's proposition of moving in with him yet. I definitely needed to talk to Stella first.

"Mark." I said nodding my head at the tall man.

Mark starts to follow me in to the building quietly.

"who's the big dude?" Stella says as soon as we get inside.

I let out a sigh, so much for being discreet.

I roll my eyes as my coworkers glance at Mark, who's right on my tail.

"Mark.." I answer shrugging my shoulders.

I walked past everyone, going to my new office. I was surprised to see it was completely different than the last time I had been in here.

"I uh redecorated, I thought it would help ya know, so you didn't think about it." Stella said from the doorway.

I looked around the spacious office, every trace of Gray had been erased.

"I love you Stell." I said, a tear in my eye.

I engulfed my best friend in a hug. We stood in each other’s embrace, smiling.

"Sooo do I have to call you Ms. (L/N) now?"

"Oh god please don’t!" I laughed.

I took a deep breath, a comfortable silence fell between us.

"this is crazy right, I mean your life has done a complete three sixty."

I let Stella's words sink in, she was completely right. A few months ago if you'd told me this would be my life, I would've laughed in your face.

"it totally has... sometimes I don't even know how to keep up." I admitted glancing at Mark who stood outside my office like a soldier.

"okay what's up with Mark?" Stella giggled looking at the large man.

"I'm afraid Jensen insists, just until they catch Riley."

"ah yes, the crazy."

"Stella, she's not crazy, she's mentally ill."

I could see Stella noticeably roll her eyes.

"why are you defending her, she literally wants to hurt you (y/n/n)!"

I chewed on my bottom lip nervously as her words sunk in.

I didn't know what Riley's intentions were, but from the damage done to my car, I gathered that we wouldn't be talking over a cup of coffee anytime soon.

"I’m sorry, I know things have been crazy for you, and I just want you to know that I'm here, to listen, to talk, to eat our feelings away with chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream... whatever you need." Stella said giving me a warm smile.

"Jensen asked me to move in with him." I blurted out, the thought weighing heavily on my mind.

"oh my gosh, that's great!" Stella squealed.

"it is?" I question, surprised by her reaction.

"it is if that's what you want?" Stella questions.

I look at the pretty brunette sitting in front of me. I didn't know what I did to deserve her friendship some days.

"I really love him Stella." I whispered.

"then you should do it."

"but I'll miss you.."

"please, you can't get rid of me that easily.."

I engulfed my friend in another hug, squeezing her tightly.

"am I interrupting something?"

I let go of Stella to see David, the owner of the magazine standing in the doorway.

"no, I’m sorry sir." I said smiling.

"just wanted to see how you were settling in, and ask if you made any progress on finding me some new voices?"

I smiled widely at Stella.

"yes sir, in fact this is one right here! Stella is the best journalist we have." I said pushing Stella forward.

Stella nervously smiled at him.

"Stella is it, well why don't we go have a talk then?" David said reaching out a hand for her to shake.

I beamed with pride as I watched them leave the office to settle in the conference room.

I could never repay Stella for how much she does for me, but this was a start.

I heard the office phone start to ring, snapping me out of my daze.

"Ms. (L/N)" I answered.

I heard Jensen chuckle on the other end.

"Ms. (L/N), sounds incredibly sexy when you say it." Jensen purred.

"oh please, I thought I was going to come undone, the first day you said my name." I shot back.

"I was just calling to see how your first day as chief editor is going?"

I felt the smile grace my face.

"good actually, it's kind of making me nervous.." I said picking my nails.

"why is it making you nervous?"

"have you ever heard the term regression to the mean?"

"no.." Jensen said sounding confused.

“It means that life can’t ever be all bad or all good. You know, eventually, things have to come back to the middle.”

"I'm not understanding baby."

"I mean that everything's been okay lately, you know, we're okay, the jobs okay, Stella and I are okay.. the middle."

"so you mean things are about to get really good.." Jensen started

"or really bad." I finished cutting him off.

"sweetheart I think this whole Riley thing has you worked up, everything will be fine, okay, nothing is going to happen." Jensen reassured.

He was probably right. I mean this whole Riley situation did have me pretty worked up.

I just felt it was something more though, like there was something looming over us and I just couldn't figure out what it was.

It could've been my conversation with Elle too. I couldn't get her words out of my head... I just want to know who my competition is.

What did that even mean?

Was she going to try to steal Jensen away from me?

I guess it would be steal Jensen back, considering she had him first.

I didn't realize how quiet I was until I heard Jensen's smooth voice through the speaker.

"baby talk to me, what's going through your mind?"

"I think you're right, I'm just a little overwhelmed, I guess Mark wasn't such a bad thing." I said staring at the man who hasn't moved from the entrance of my office.

"see I told you..." Jensen said in a teasing tone.

"I don't have to take him everywhere do I? He's not coming home with me!"

I heard Jensen's hearty laugh boom through the speaker.

"he's definitely NOT going home with you.. he's just for when I can't be with you to protect you."

"my hero.." I swooned.

Jensen laughed again.

"I miss you already." I whispered.

"oh god I sound so needy." I added quickly.

"I miss you too.."

"so I uh talked to Stella about your proposition." I said biting my thumb nail.

"oh yeah? and how did that go?"

"good.." I answered being vague in my answer purposely.

"and do you have an answer for me?"

"yeah..." I whispered not being able to fight the smile on my face.

"well get on with it then, c'mon woman you're killing me here." Jensen whined.

"I mean, I'll have to get some things from the apartment." I said.

"so that's a yes?"

"yes Jensen, I'll move in with you."

****************************************************

"Are you going home? I'm going to grab some things and stay at Jensen's tonight." I told Stella as we gathered our things, the end of our day approaching.

"No, Matt's taking me out to dinner to celebrate my new promotion, thanks for that by the way! I can't believe I'm the new lead journalist!" Stella squealed making me smile.

"I didn't do anything, that was all you."

"Still, I couldn't have gotten it without you putting in a word to David for me."

"It's the least I could do, you do so much for me."

Stella wrapped her arms around me squeezing me tightly for the third time this day.

I've been so caught up in all things Jensen that I realized I really missed my friend, and I was so lucky to have her in my corner.

"woah, that's my woman."

Stella let go, throwing a look to Jensen who now stood in the doorway to my office. I didn’t see Mark anymore, Jensen must have dismissed him.

"nice office..." Jensen admired.

"I redecorated, thank you very much." Stella piped up.

"so when I need any redecorating done, I'll know who to call." Jensen smirked.

Stella glanced at her phone quickly before meeting my eyes again.

"I think Matt's here, I'll see you soon.." Stella said squeezing my hand before going over to Jensen.

"Jensen, take care of her... if you don't I'll chop your dick off." Stella threatened.

"Stella!" I exclaimed mortified.

Jensen just laughed in response.

"You have my word Stella, I mean I would kind of like to keep my dick." Jensen said making me roll my eyes at the pair.

"see you tomorrow." Stella said with a final wave.

Jensen smiled at her shaking his head. He came over to me wrapping me in a hug.

“she’s something..” Jensen laughed.

“you have no idea… are you ready to go home?” I asked cocking my eyebrow.

“as long as I’m with you I am home.” Jensen said.

I rolled my eyes at his line.

“that was incredibly cheesy.” I laughed.

“I thought it was romantic… even a little bit?” Jensen pouted.

“okay just a little bit.”

Jensen smiled, leaning down to pull me in for a kiss. I took a shaky breath as he connected our lips. I felt electricity pulsating through my skin as his lips moved on mine.

“I love you.” He said as he pulled away.

“I love you more.” I whispered.

Jensen gave me another quick peck.

“Impossible.”

Jensen grabbed my bag with one hand, grasping mine with other, as he led us out of the office. Cole stood by the car waiting with an open door.

“Ms. (L/N).” Cole nodded as I slid in.

“You really need to give him a break..” I said laughing at Jensen.

“Cole doesn’t need a break, do ya Cole?”

“no Mr. Ackles.”

“Cole you can be honest I know this one’s a lot to deal with.” I said smacking Jensen’s chest playfully.

“between you and me ma’am.” Cole started giving Jensen a smirk.

I laughed at Jensen’s flustered expression.

Cole pulled up to our apartment, quickly getting out so he could open my door. Jensen shuffled out after me. As soon as we stepped out of the car, his phone started ringing. He pulled it out checking the caller ID.

“It’s Jared.”

“you can take it.. I’m just going to grab some toiletries and a couple outfits, I’ll be right back.” I said kissing his cheek.

Jensen offered me a grateful smile as he answered his phone.

I unlocked the door, before grabbing our mail and going inside. I would have to remember to reroute my mail to the new address. I threw the mail on the counter, wanting to pack my things before I went through it.

I grabbed my overnight bag throwing articles of clothing in it before going to our bathroom. I made sure to grab my toothbrush, hairbrush and the other essentials. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror breathing a deep sigh.

I was really doing this.

I threw the rest of my stuff in my bag, zipping it up and walking back in to the kitchen. I set my bag down grabbing the mail to sift through it.

I turned around, feeling my blood run cold.

It was her.

Riley.

I gasped at the sight of her dropping the mail.

I didn’t know how she got in, the door was still locked.

I could see from the look on her face that she was distressed. I was afraid, but I wouldn’t let her see. I needed to remain calm.

“Riley… uh Jensen’s right outside, we could go see him.” I hesitantly said, holding my hands out so she could see I meant her no harm.

I shuddered as she pulled a gun from her pocket.

“I came to see you.”

I shivered, her voice was haunting, like she was in grave pain. I didn’t take my eyes off the gun she held to her side.

“okay..” I breathed.

“Jensen told me what happened Riley, I know you’re in a lot of pain, and I’m so sorry.. Jensen talks about you still, he cares about you.” I said trying to diffuse the situation.

I flinched as a warning shot rang out. I could feel the breath getting caught in my chest as I feared for my life.

“DON’T LIE!” Riley yelled, bringing the gun up so it was now pointed directly at me.

“just tell me what you have that I don’t.” she cried.

“nothing Riley, I’m nothing.” I pleaded.

“but he kisses you, and sleeps in your bed.” Riley said.

I felt the color drain from my face.

“how do you know that?”

“I saw you, I watched you… I know you love him but I do too.” Riley said eerily calm.

I thought back to the night when Jensen slept over. I thought I had seen someone but chalked it up to my imagination playing tricks on me… but now I know it was her watching us.

“Riley why don’t you put the gun down.” I begged trying to maintain my composure.

“you don’t even know him, what he likes, you don’t give him what he wants, he’s just pretending with you and he’ll get tired of pretending!” Riley growled.

Suddenly Jensen burst in the door followed by Cole.

Riley didn’t move the gun from me.

I could see the fear in Jensen’s eyes as he glanced at me.

“Riley..”

Jensen pointed at himself, asking Riley to turn the gun on him. Riley glanced between me and Jensen before turning the gun his way.

“Jensen don’t.” I cried, letting a few tears slip out.

Jensen held his hand out quieting me.

“I know you don’t want to hurt me Riley.” Jensen said, taking a step closer to her.

Riley breathed a heavy sigh as Jensen reached out wrapping his hand around the barrel of the gun. He yanked it out of her hands, switching the safety on, and putting it in his pocket.

“come here.” Jensen said reaching his arms out.

Riley collapsed in his arms crying. Jensen held her stroking her hair.

“Cole get (y/n) out of here, take her back home.” Jensen said.

Cole took a step towards me, but I took a step back.

“I’m not going anywhere.” I said not wanting to leave Jensen alone.

“(y/n) for once just do what I ask!” Jensen snapped.

I felt the tears roll down my cheeks as I grabbed Cole’s hand allowing him to lead me outside to the car. He opened the door gesturing for me to get in.

I dropped his hand stepping away from the car. I gave Cole a look, and started to walk down the street.

“Ms. (L/N) please.”

“stop it Cole.” I growled walking away.

I didn’t know where I was going, I just had to get away. I felt the tears staining my cheeks as I walked.

It was too much.

It was all too much.

for once just do what I ask..

he’s just pretending with you, and he’ll get tired of pretending..

I covered my ears trying to drown out the loud voices that were screaming at me.

I collapsed on the sidewalk, bringing my knees to my chest and sobbing.

this is what I meant.

regression to the mean..

Author Note:

I’m sorry for breaking your hearts again! Part fifteen will reveal a lot, so make sure you stick around to find out! If you liked this part please indicate so with a heart, comment, reblog, or a follow! It really is motivating! I appreciate you all!

xoxoxo

Liv

[countrymusiclover]

Two - We're not Alone

Battle of the Mind and Heart

Part 3

Tags - send me a ask to be added @aintinacage @mostlymarvelgirl

Erik and I had left and traveled to another spot where he had gotten information on some more Nazi’s that were still alive. I didn’t agree with what he was doing but I somewhat understand why he was so frustrated and wanted blood. Walking through the hot streets he opened the door and let me inside first. “How much longer are we going to do this, Lehnsherr?”

“You can leave anytime you want.” He responded reaching for the door handle not saying another word until we were inside the bar.

“Afternoon, gentlemen. Hot out there.” Erik sat down on a barstool hanging his white hat and jacket on a hook. “Beer, please. German bear. Of course.”

“Yes, it’s bitburger. You like it?” One of the men that was wearing a yellow shirt responded by eyeing me with a smirk on his face. “You got yourself quite a fine lady there.”

Shifting around on my barstool I corrected the man. “Oh no. We’re not together.”

“Well then maybe I can buy you another round.” He suggested with a cocky smile.

Erik turned around putting one hand on my hip and I could tell that his grip was more intense than it should have been. “Don’t lie to the men, darling. She’s just trying to be nice, gentleman.”

“I-“ I started to say something but decided against it.

“What brings you to Argentina?” Erik picked up his beer, drinking it slowly before he asked the two men sitting at the table.

“The climate. I'm a pig farmer.” One guy wearing yellow drank his beer.

The other guy in a white shirt spots up. “Tailor. Since I was a boy. My father made the finest suits in Dusseldorf.”

“My parents were from Dusseldorf.” Erik got to his feet and went sitting down at the table with the pair.

The white shirt man asked. “Ah. What was their name?”

“They didn't have a name. It was taken away from them…” The mutant who could control metal raised his beer glass and clinked it with each of theirs. “By pig farmers...And tailors.”

Raising my glass to my mouth I took a long drink being able to feel the tense that was in the bar. The bartender stared at me silently while I tapped the fingers of my freehand on the table. “Three…two…one.” I mumbled under my breath glancing over my shoulder seeing him turn over his arm and show the pair the nazi numbers they gave him.

The man that wore a yellow shirt moved his freehand downward where I clicked my tongue. “Tsk not smart dude.” He attempted to stab Erik but he managed to grab the blade and hold his arm down on the table with his other hand.

“Blood and honor.” Erik glared at the man, reading the words engraved on the blade. “Which would you care to shed first?”

The man whispered back. “We were under orders…”

Erik declared stabbing the man in the hand and he screamed, alerting the bartender to rush to the back and come back with a handgun. “Blood then.”

“Freeze, asshole.”

The other guy got to his feet telling the bartender. “Come on, shoot.”

Downing the rest of my beer I quickly moved behind the bartender who didn’t have enough time to stop me. Raising my hands to the sides of his head my hands turned red and he winced sharply. “Argh!”

Erik used his power making the guy move the handgun and pulled the trigger on the other guy who was standing. “Nice trick, Shaw girl.”

“You know my name, Lehnsherr!” I grumbled removing my hands from the man’s head when he still held his head and lowered himself to his knees while I stood behind him.

He didn’t respond at first and rather focused on the men. The knife left the guy's hand and stabbed the bartender in the gut. Then it came back into Erik’s hand and he stabbed the blade into the Nazi’s hand again. The man screamed, whimpering. “Who... what are you?”

“Let's just say I'm Frankenstein's monster.” Erik ran a hand through his hair getting up and standing in front of the picture of my father before he turned around and shot the guy still alive at the table. “And I'm looking for my creator.”

Bending myself down on a knee I noticed the handgun that had fallen to the floor. Picking it up the bartender was crying with blood before I held the weapon out for Erik. “Here you do it. I’m not going to kill somebody.”

“You’re infuriating, Addison.” He takes it from my smaller hand compared to his larger one.

He turned slightly to the guy with the knife in his hand and he fired the trigger causing me to cover my ears when the weapon went off. “Say that about yourself - ah!”

Heading towards the door I ran my hands over the fabric of the gray short sleeve shirt I wore. I had paired it with some Jeans and some brown boots. Tying my hair up in a ponytail since it was so hot there. Exiting the bar I almost made it to the car trying to open the door but it shut the second I got it opened. “Seriously, what are you five or something?”

“I’m the same as you. But you seem to be acting like one right now. You refuse to accept that you aren’t cut out for this and you won’t tell me what your power truly is.” He rolled his eyes.

Throwing my arms away from my sides I snapped. “Maybe because you haven’t proven you are trustworthy!”

“I have been letting you tag along with me this whole time who could have killed you a long time ago.” The German man snapped at me. “So what are you bringing to this partnership?”

Flaring my nose I huffed not wanting to hear another snarky remark from him. “How about you tell me, Metal man cause from where I stand I haven’t been much help to your mission.”

“I would say it’s because I enjoy your company but that wouldn’t be true.” Erik smirked down dryly. Yet unknown to either of them at the time that would be so close to the truth that we wouldn’t believe it later down the road.

Showing him the finger I just started stomping away not being able to stand his face anymore. “Goodbye Erik Lehnsherr. Hopefully your revenge plan is worth it!”

“What if I helped you find out why your mother left.” He blurted out causing me to halt in my boots. Slowly focusing my attention back to him I formed my hands into fists at my sides just staying still for a brief moment.

My father would never talk about my mother. I just knew that she left when I was younger. So finding out why was really important to me. She was just as valuable as Erik’s mother was to him, so how could I refuse. “If I help you find my father then you’ll find out what happened to my mother.”

“Yes, I will.” He vowed with those deep eyes of his that I sometimes found myself getting lost in. All the while I had to fight myself and not imagine what it would be like to kiss him or how attractive he was.

It was a few weeks before we had traveled to the most current location that my father was supposed to be at. It was a boat somewhere in America. Erik had slipped on a diving suit and I had one on as we snuck onto the boat. Hiding around the corner Erik drew a knife moving around the corner about to strike my father until there was a blonde woman with him that turned to glass and he held his head in pain. “Little Erik lensherr.”

The blonde declared. “He's here to kill you.”

“What kind of a greeting is that...After all these years?” My father tilted his head upwards, being able to sense that someone else was there with them. “It's rude to join a conversation, Addison.”

Slowly coming around the corner I clasped my hands together in front of me. “Hello father.”

Erik grabbed the knife from inside his suit and launched it towards Shaw's chest. But the blonde that quickly turned her body into crystal grabbed it. She ran forward and threw him over the side of the ship. “Erik!”

“Emma. We don't harm our own kind.” My father taunts her.

Emma glanced in my direction. “What about her?”

“She's my daughter. I'm surprised to see you after all this time. How have you been-”

He went to touch my face but I snagged his wrist harshly in my nails and he winced seeing my hand turn red taking some of his power. “Don’t pretend like you care about me now.”

“Ah! What the…you're like me.” He gasped and I could see amazement flash through his eyes until we heard a boat horn coming towards us. “Ah! Now it's a party.”

“This is the US coast guard. Do not attempt to move your vessel. Stay where you are.” Someone from the guard ships called out. There was another mutant working with my father who used wind and drowned some guys on smaller boats who were coming towards our boat.

Noticing the knife on the ground I quickly pick it up seeing Emma and my father have their backs to me. “You can do this, Addi.” I whispered to myself attempting to run up and press the blade to my father’s neck.

Yet the blonde spun around holding me by the throat and I dropped the knife clawing her arm for breath. “Nice try. Which would you prefer? My way or the water.”

“Urgh!” I croaked through the discomfort.

My father grabbed her shoulder. “Let her go, Emma. We need to go.” She launched me over the side of the ship and I hugged my knees to my chest before I got merged into the cold water.

Blinking my eyes open I held my breath hoping someone would figure out that Erik and I were in the water. Looking around I almost gasped seeing a sub coming out the bottom of the ship meaning that my father was getting away. Yet the sub wasn't going far and then my eyes shifted to the end of it and saw Erik swimming and using his power to hold the sub from leaving. Swimming over to him I could see he was having a hard time right before someone jumped down into the water right behind him. “You can't. You'll drown. You have to let go. I know what this means to you, but you're going to die. Please, Erik, calm your mind.”

I held in a gasp hearing someone’s voice inside my mind before he managed to drag Erik up to the surface. Kicking my legs and arms I released a sharp gasp getting my head above water. “Get off me! Get off!” Erik pushed the stranger off of him.

“Calm down! Just breathe. We're here!” The stranger hollered clearly back to the coast guard ships.

Erik gasped, splashing to keep his head above water. “Who are you? “

“My name is Charles Xavier.” The man with brown hair and bright blue eyes introduced himself.

Kicking my legs I eyed Charles as he called himself in awe. “What made you think it was a good idea to jump into freezing water like that?”

“I couldn't let either of you drown. Especially when there was something I could do to rescue you.” He explained with a smile.

The man who said he hated me questioned the man. “You were in my head. How did you do that?”

“You have your tricks, I have mine. I'm like you. Just calm your mind.” Charles said seeing the guard getting closer to the three of us.

Erik breathed out. “I thought I was alone.”

That sentence made me both sad and annoyed at him. ‘What am I invisible or something’ I thought to myself not caring if Charles could read my mind.

“You're not alone. Erik, you're not alone.” Charles declared shifting his attention over to me. “What's your name, love?”

I thought about saying my full name but decided not to. “Addi…Addi Shaw.” The guard ships finally reached us and we all got back on the ship and into some dry clothes. I changed into some dark jeans, some black boots and white sweater. I finished tying only two strands of my hair back with a clip and left the rest down. Charles had introduced me and Erik to a CIA guy and girl. He also had a sister who said her name was Raven but I didn't know her mutation yet. “Welcome to my facility. My mission has been to investigate the application of paranormal powers in military defense.” The CIA man explained when we all got out of the limo car.

Erik corrected the man walking beside Charles. “Or offense.”

“This guy Shaw, schmidt, whatever you want to call him,

He's working with the Russians.” The man kept explaining why he had called us in. “We might need your help to stop him.”

Charles clasped his hands together. “Marvelous. So we're to be the CIA's new mutant division, yes?”

“Something like that.” The CIA responded, leading the others inside and leaving the three of us outside for a moment.

Erik passed, eyeing me silently before Charles raised a brow in my direction, curious. “Addi, I was just wondering what relationship do you have with this guy Shaw?”

“He's my…He’s my father.” I sucked in a breath seeing Charles part his lips in shock, and we didn't say another word and headed inside with the others.

Comments really appreciated ❤️

[fangirlingfromdownunder]

A Sweet Mishap- Chapter 16

Pairing - Jensen Ackles x Reader 

A/N: I just want to start by thanking everyone for all the love on this story so far. Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list. This chapter is a little heavier (as is the story going forward, but I'll include potential triggers for each chapter as relevant), so please read the TW below and only read on if you feel comfortable doing so. Also, this chapter's a little longer since I likely won't be able to upload this Friday due to work commitments.

Potential Trigger Warnings: none

A Sweet Mishap Masterlist | Main Masterlist

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Stella’s house is a bustle of energy by 10am. The hair stylist and make up artist are setting up while the photographer is milling around getting photos of the dress and accessories as they get laid out. Me, Stella and the bridesmaids are all sipping fresh coffees as we try to wake up. The excitement is definitely in the air, but so is the tiredness from the early wake up call. I lay out some freshly baked breakfast snacks, kindly donated by Stewie for the big day; while he declined to do the cake weeks ago, once he got back in the kitchen he promised to provide some light snacks for the morning. We are all thankful for his contribution, as none of us feel like cooking. 

Felicity and Gabriella are the first in the chairs; while they of course want to spend the most time on the bride, it’s also important that she’s the freshest. I enjoy sitting back, relaxing and snacking while I wait for my turn. While I wait, I scroll through my photos for the hair and makeup inspiration pics I took offline and then connect up to Stella’s bluetooth speaker and put on some music to boost the mood. The stylists start some small talk about the bride and groom, how they met, the bachelorette party, the plans for tonight, anything they can think of to build the excitement. We all join in, sharing happy and funny stories. 

After a while, Stella and I are finally sitting side-by-side as the stylist brushes and curls her hair and the beautician applies foundation to my face. It’s everything I could have dreamed it would be, and I can’t help but hope that one day the roles are reversed and she’s by my side while they’re styling my hair for my wedding. I push the thought away before I can imagine any other parts of that fictional day, like who the groom could be. Instead, I root myself in the present, wanting to enjoy this day for what it is: one of the best days of my best friend’s life and so by default, mine.

A few hours later, me and the bridesmaids are helping eachother into our dresses carefully, trying our best not to disturb our hair and makeup. The stylists are still standing around on standby to complete any final touchups, but we all know there isn’t time for a redo if we mess anything up too much. Once we’re all dressed, we finally help Stella into her snow-white ballgown-style wedding dress. I help straighten out the off-shoulder straps over her biceps, ensuring the sequins don’t scratch her, while Felicity carefully kneels down to fluff out the skirt. I then pull her hair out from where it caught in the back of her dress and smooth it out along her back, careful not to catch or pull on her perfectly styled curls and bun. 

When I come back around in front of her I take both of her hands in mine. “So beautiful, Nick isn’t gonna know what hit him.” The bridesmaids agree with me, gushing over the fully-dressed bride. We all put on the final touches like our shoes and jewellery while the stylists check and touch up our hair and makeup as necessary, just before we’re interrupted by a car horn outside. I look over at Stella with a big smile, “Time to go marry yourself a husband!”

Stella squeals with excitement. We collect our bouquets and purses and head outside. There are two classic cars in the driveway all decorated up; one for me and Stella and one for the other two bridesmaids. I help Stella in, being sure not to crumple her dress or veil or get it caught in the door when I shut it behind her, I then round the car and get in the other side. The bridesmaid’s car pulls out first and then ours follows a close distance behind. Stella’s knee bounces all the way to the chapel. I let her squeeze my hand as she tries to steady her nervous excitement. 

When the cars pull up out the back, the carpark is already full and her parents are waiting by the door. I get out and then help Stella out before straightening out her dress and making sure she looks perfect. I then hand her over to her parents. They pull her in for a big hug as I step to the side with Felicity and Gabriella. The three of us walk inside and stand just behind the doors in a line as one of the organisers explains the process to us, despite having gone through a full rehearsal last night. I smile back at Stella, standing between her parents as I hear the bridal march begin to play through the chapel. As the organisers push open the large wooden doors everyone stands and turns around. Felicity and Gabriella start to walk down the aisle first, followed by me and then finally Stella and her parents. As I look up at Nick I can see the tears in his eyes as he focuses on his beautiful bride. I smile brighter. Once I reach the front I step to the side and face the crowd as I watch Stella step up to her husband-to-be. He kisses her cheek and takes her hands as her parents pass her to him. I step forward to take her bouquet before standing back to the side. She gives me a grateful smile before focusing fully on her groom and I just know that everyone else has fallen away in their minds and it’s just the two of them there together.

The ceremony is beautiful, it goes perfectly according to plan, just as everything in their life does. The celebrant welcomes everyone and starts the ceremony before prompting them to share their personalised vows. They both share their promises and words of love through teary eyes before exchanging their rings. Then, after sharing a passionate kiss, they run hand-in-hand back down the aisle, out the wooden doors and into a waiting car. Everyone follows behind to see them off. We wave excitedly as they zoom off for a private photoshoot before the reception. As everyone mills around outside and chats, I try to emerse myself in idle conversation to pass time. The doors to the restaurant won’t open for a little while so we need to pass time. Eventually, once the sun is beginning to set everyone starts to file into their cars and make their way over to the venue; I want to be in there and set up before the bride and groom make their big entrance. Gabriella, Felicity and I catch a ride with Travis in the hire car they came in, Travis rode with the groom so is happy to drive the rental with us. 

The restaurant is beautifully decorated, just as we left it. With party favours on each table and stunning centrepieces, made up of flower arrangements. Each seat is labelled to match the seating plan that I’d painstakingly helped Stella and Nick create to ensure the smoothest night possible. Most people get along, but every family has those few people that are best kept apart for whatever reason. Everything is exactly as I remember except a small stage set up in the corner with a sound system and instruments. Despite no one being near them, quiet music is playing behind the chatter of everyone’s conversations about how great the service was and how beautiful everything is and just catching up in general. It’s amazing how weddings can bring everyone together, I see people you haven’t spoken to in years. Of course, I don’t no many people there, but that’s okay, today’s not about me. I’m just thrilled for Stella. 

I visit the bar and order a wine to get my night started before I move around the room doing my best to mingle and chat with her family and a few of our shared friends from college that I haven’t spoken to in a while. Most of them have partners accompanying them, but a few are single. After a while, everyone finally takes their allocated seats. A few gasps and whispered chatter ring out around the room seconds before live music starts to play from behind me. Just as I’m about to turn around everyone starts to cheer as the bride and groom make their big entrance. I join them clapping and cheering as yI give them the biggest smile as they make their way – the long way around – to their seats in the middle of the bridal table. It’s only when I turn to look over at Stella and Nick that I catch the band in my peripheral vision and my jaw drops. 

I force myself to keep my focus on the lovely new couple and not make eye contact with the man expertly strumming his guitar from the small stage. The raging ball of guilt in my stomach does a sommersault and I feel sick but push it back down. Thankfully, Travis takes the attention of the room by standing up to toast the newly weds and give a short speech. I keep my eyes firmly on him as he speaks. Once he finishes he nods over to me as he introduces me for the maid-of-honor speech. It takes me a moment to acknowledge him. But once I get ahold of myself, I stand up and focus on my notes as I attempt to deliver the speech smoothly. I push everything else out of my mind for those painfully slow few minutes as I focus on the bride and groom and tell stories about mine and Stella’s friendship and how happy I am that she found Nick and how happy I hope and know they’ll be together as they move into this next stage in their life. I finally raise my glass and everyone cheers. I wink at Stella as I sit down.

Before the meals are set to come out, Stella informs me that she needs to use the bathroom. I follow her in and help her lift up the massive skirt and keep it from getting dirty while she uses the toilet.

“Was that your doing?” I ask as she pees.

“I told you, I got an offer that I couldn’t refuse. Plus, Dean Winchester was my crush first. How could I turn that down. I don’t know what happened or didn’t between the two of you, but he was very persuasive.”

“How? I didn’t…”

“I don’t know how he figured it out but maybe three days ago the venue called me and said someone had offered to play for the wedding, they gave him my number. And as I said, he was very persuasive.” I help Stella fix her dress while she washes her hands. “It’s my wedding, I got a band that I happen to love. If that also results in my best friend getting her plus one and a dance then that’s just a bonus. I hope you know that I expect a full, detailed explanation of everything that has already gone down and everything that goes down while I’m on my honeymoon, once I get back.”

“We’ll see. For now, tonight’s about you! So let’s get you back out there to your husband!” Ilead her back to the table just in time for the alternative drop meals to be delivered. After dinner, each of their parents and a few other guests give speeches before handing back over to the bride and groom to give their speeches to each other. I engross yourself in the speeches to keep my eyes from wandering to the back of the room. Although amongst all the kind words and talk of eternal love I notice that the background music isn’t being played by a live guitar anymore but instead is a quiet pre-recorded romance track. With that revelation, I let my eyes wander and I notice the stage is free of people. Knowing he’s no longer so close behind me, at least for a few minutes I relax slightly. 

By the time all the speeches are over, the band’s back in place playing quietly as Stella and Nick stand in the centre of the room to cut their cake. As the knife scrapes the plate, they kiss and everyone cheers. The staff then come in to take the cake to the kitchen to slice it up and prepare the desserts. My attention is instantly drawn to the band when I hear Jensen’s deep voice sing the first notes to the song Stella picked for their first dance. I’mamazed that he either already knew it or learned it in just a few days. Stella and Nick take eachother’s hands and move slowly in time with the music. I watch as they gracefully move across the floor. Her head rests on his shoulder as he leads. 

As the song ends and the next one starts Felicity and Gabby nudge me and I quickly stand up and take hands with Travis as he leads me to the floor, followed by the two bridesmaids and groomsmen. I do my best to throw myself into the dance and focus on Travis as he leads me, dancing surprising well for what I know of him. Once the song ends I try to pull back but he holds me close. “I know the kind of man you know me to be, but I promised I wouldn’t let you dance alone or sit out tonight.”

“You didn’t have to do that…I’m okay.”

“I did…Stella’s surprisingly scary.” 

I smile and nod, prepared to let him lead me into the next song. But as the next song starts I notice the voice filling the room is different. Someone comes up behind us and places a hand on my shoulder. “Mind if I have this dance?”

I flick my head around to look at the owner of the deep, Texan drawl. 

Travis looks at me to check and I nod. “Alright,” he says as he steps back, “She’s all yours.”

I smile at Travis as he walks off to find someone else to dance with before spinning around and taking Jensen’s hands and letting him sway me with the slow beat. In a hushed voice I say, “I can’t believe you’re here…”

“You stopped answering my messages or calls…What choice did I have?”

“To forget me…Move on?”

He shakes his head. “I know this isn’t the time or place to have the conversation we need to have, so will you meet me tomorrow?” I meet his eyes briefly and nod. “Good, then let’s just enjoy this dance.” I rest my head on his shoulder for the remainder of the song. Just before the song ends he spins me out and back into his chest. “I promised the bride a dance, so I should go. But thank you. I plan to steal another from you later.”

“Yeah, she’s a pretty big Dean fan…She couldn’t believe I didn’t know you.” 

He lets out a little chuckle, “Yeah, you’re rare and special. Save another dance for me later?” I nod and he pulls away and crosses the floor to where Stella and Nick are playfully dancing to the now upper-tempo song. When Jensen cuts into their dance Nick comes over to me. We both stand off to the side, leaning against the bridal table. 

“Hey, so, uh…I owe you an apology,” he says, breaking the awkward silence.

“Nah, it’s alright. You were just looking out for your bride, as you should. I’d be more mad if you didn’t.”

“Maybe, but I did go overboard. I just get protective when it comes to her…But I should’ve known pushing you away would make her mad too. I’m just glad she didn’t call today off.”

“Nah, she wouldn’t, she loves you. And she knows you were acting from a place of love when you did it. So do I. Plus…you weren’t all wrong, but this isn’t the time or place. We should get back out there before your bride physically drags us out there herself.”

“Yeah…thanks for helping make all this happen by the way. I don’t think I ever told you, but you’ve been a massive help. That’s another reason I’ve felt so bad for what I said, despite what I said you kept turning up and helping with everything. You already know she appreciates it, but I do too.”

I look around the room. “I’m just glad it all worked out. You guys deserve a fantastic night.” Not sure what else to say, I take his hand and lead him out onto the dancefloor.

Jensen moves back and forth between the stage and the dancefloor, doing his job performing but also giving the people what they want and dancing with any girl who recognises him. The night’s almost wrapping up by the time he gets back to me. I’m leaning against the wall finishing a glass of wine when he come up to me.

“So, I was just informed the next song’s the last…care to join me?” He holds his hand out to me expectantly. 

I finish the last mouthful of wine, put the empty glass on the nearest table and take his hand. After everything I’ve said and done and after he pushed so hard to be here, I feel you owe it to him, but also I really want to be in his arms again. He leads me into the middle of the room as his bandmate starts to play and sing a slower love song. He pulls me close, his hands resting on the middle of my back, not letting them fall too low. Mine rest around his neck as we sway in time with the music. As the song goes on, he starts to sing along quietly, just loud enough for me to hear. 

“I've been waitin' for so long

For somethin' to arrive

For love to come along

Now our dreams are comin' true

Through the good times and the bad

Yeah, I'll be standin' there by you

Baby you're all that I want

When you're lyin' here in my arms

I'm findin' it hard to believe

We're in heaven

And love is all that I need

And I found it there in your heart

It isn't too hard to see

We're in heaven”

Once the song ends he pulls back, but only far enough that he can make eye contact with me. “Give me a chance…let me come over, or come to my hotel, or meet me somewhere neutral, location doesn’t matter, just please…for whatever reason I can’t stop thinking about you.”

“Jens…”

“I’m just asking to talk.”

I nod. “Alright, but somewhere private. We don’t need a repeat of last time, tonight’s gonna be bad enough.”

He nods. “Yeah.”

“Sorry to interrupt,” I hear Stella say from behind us. I pull away from Jensen to face her.

“Congratulatious on the big night. I hope you had a great time,” he says to Stella.

“Thank you. And thank you for coming and playing for us tonight, it was much better than a jukebox. Plus, you made a lot of people’s nights,” she looks at me with a smirk, “Most of all my amazing maid-of-honor here, and believe me, she totally deserved a great night after all the hard work she’s put into making it happen.”

He looks at me and smiles, “Yeah. Well anyway, I better help Steve pack up the gear.”

Once Jensen’s out of ear-shot, Stella says, “I’m so sorry for interrupting, that seemed important, but Nick and I are gonna head out, but I couldn’t disappear on my honeymoon without saying goodbye to you first, and thanking you for everything.”

“I’m just glad you had a great night,” I pull her in for a hug.

When she pulls away she reaches over for her bouquet on the bridal table. “Amid everything I forgot to do the toss, but…” She hands it to me. “Give him a chance. Give yourself a chance.”

“Stel…” I shake my head while smiling at her, “Just go and enjoy your honeymoon. We’ll talk when you get back.”

As Nick approaches, she quickly says, “I’m definitely gonna do that! Thank you, I love you and I’ll talk to you in 10 days!”

He wraps his arms around her waist as he comes up behind her. “You two have fun!”

The remaining guests wave the happy couple out as they run out hand-in-hand. Everyone else filters out pretty quickly after that but I hang around to gather some of the decorations and items that I know Stella will want to keep, such as photos, the wishing well, and the guestbook. Just as I finish getting everything important into a couple of boxes, Jensen comes back up beside me. “Need a hand?”

“I can manage, you should go.”

Felicity call out from the doorway, “Hey Y/N, need a ride? My Uber’s here!”

I look over at her and then back at Jensen apologetically. “Sorry, I should go.”

“Uh, yeah…” he nods, and I pick up one of the boxes but he puts his hand on it to stop me as I turn around. “ Unless, you wanna stay back for a night cap, I can call you a ride after. It doesn’t have to be with me, I can get you your own.”

I hesitate and Felicity calls out again, “Y/N! He’s getting impatient. We gotta go!”

I look between her and Jensen again and then sigh before waving at her and calling out. “You go. I gotta finish up here.”

She rolls her eyes at my hesitation before disappearing outside.

Obviously feeling guilty for putting me in a difficult position, Jensen takes his hand off the box in my hands and apologises.

“It’s fine. I would’ve had to do a few trips and they wouldn’t have liked that either. But I can get my own ride, it’s fine. And, uh, I think they’re gonna kick us out, so the night cap’s probably gonna be out too, sorry.” I look around and notice it’s just the two of us left inside. I put the box back on the table to rest my arms for a moment.

“Alright. How much are you against getting a ride together at least? I don’t wanna overstep or anything. I just want more time,” He gestures at the boxes, “Plus, I could give you a hand with all this.”

I bite my lip as I consider his offer. “Listen, I’m too tired and too tipsy and this is gonna come out all wrong, but I just need you to know that just because you came all this way doesn’t mean I’m going to have sex with you.”

He opens and closes his mouth a few times as he tries to come up with a response. “No, I…I don’t expect you to…That’s not…I wasn’t insinuating.”

I nod. “Alright good. A ride and the boxes. That’s it then. I just need your arms.” I pick up a box and then realise what I said. “That’s not…I just mean…”

“I get it. It’s fine. Let me just call my driver and then I’ll give you a hand with those.” He pulls out his phone.

“Your…driver?” I shake my head. “It must be nice…”

“It’s not what you think. He’s a good friend.” Jensen shakes his head as he holds his phone up to his ear. “Hey Clif…Yeah, I’m ready if you just wanna pull up round back…Yeah…” he glances back over at me with a smile. “We need to make a stop on the way though…Yep, I’ll cover it…See you soon.” He hangs up and leans against the table looking at me before he grabbing the other box and walking out to the parking lot with me. 

While we wait for his friend to bring the car around, he says, “Look, I’m sorry if I’ve been too forward or given the wrong signals. I don’t mean to. I didn’t come all this way to attempt to win you over for sex…I just wanted to give you a reason to talk to me. As I said, I can’t stop thinking about you, and I couldn’t leave things the way we did.”

A large black car pulls up in front of us and a tall, muscular man gets out of the driver’s seat and opens the trunk. Jensen puts his box in and I follow suit. Jensen then opens the back door for me to climb in. I slide over to the far side and he climbs in beside me. Once the driver takes his seat again he turns around, “Where to boss?”

“You can drop the act Clif, she knows you’re a friend.”

“Alright, Boss. Where to?”

Jensen rolls his eyes and then looks over at me. I tell them my address and Clif keys it into the GPS. Despite wanting to use the time to respond to Jensen’s confession outside the restaurant, I feel awkward with his friend in the front seat. Between the nervous energy and the adrenalin in my system, my leg starts to bounce. Jensen notices and after hesitating a few times, finally places his hand on my knee; he doesn’t slide it any higher, just sits it comfortingly on the top of my knee. We endure the rest of the ride in silence until Clif finally finds a park on the street in front of my apartment building.

“Am I waiting?” Clif asks.

Jensen looks at me, smiles and then nods. “I’m just gonna help her with those boxes, I’ll be right back.” I open my door and Jensen follows suit. He opens the trunk and we each take a box and then I lead him inside to the lift.

As I press the button, I look up at him. “You can just leave it, I can manage from here.”

“You don’t want me to see your place?”

“Honestly? Not really…But also, you’ve done more than enough.”

The lift dings as the doors open. He steps inside first, leaving me no choice but to follow. I put the box on the floor so I can press the button for my floor. Once the doors shut he says, “So, am I crazy? Am I chasing something that you’re never gonna be ready for?”

“No. I just have things I need to work through. Trust issues, personal issues, financial issues…Look I’m too tired for this conversation tonight. I know you came all this way, but…”

“Yeah, I came all this way and put you on the spot, which is exactly what I promised I wouldn’t do. I’m sorry.” The doors open and I lead him down to my apartment but stop in front of the door. I pull my keys out of my purse but don’t move to unlock the door. Sensing my uncertainty he places the box on the floor by my feet. “Take the night. I don’t want to push you. Just text me in the morning and let me know what you decide. I will step back completely if that’s what you want or need. But if you want to give us a chance, text me somewhere to meet and we can talk. Okay?”

I nod as I fiddle with the keys. He nods and turns and walks back down the hall to the elevator. I look down at the boxes and notice Stella’s bouquet sticking out the top; her words ring through my head. I look back over at Jensen just as the doors open. I call out, “Meet me at the cafe, 6pm!”

He smiles, nods and then steps inside. Once the doors close I let myself into my apartment, cart in the boxes and dump them in the corner. Not having the energy – physical or mental – to wash off my makeup, undo my hair or shower, I collapse on the couch.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

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