#I don’t know how to explain my process and THAT is my biggest problem lmao | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

neko-rogers · 4 years ago

Text

But It’s Better If You Do

Trying to keep your relationship with your professor was easy enough, until you learned that someone had found out about it.

words: 7,424 tags: manipulative!peter, explicit noncon/dubcon elements, degredation, implied overstimulation, blackmailing, kidnapping, college student and professor relationship,

a/n: whew this had a lot of words compared to what i usually write. plus, since im bad at titles, i’ll just use my fav song titles lmao. (ps. erik lehnsherr aka magneto is here and im just glad i could put him in my little fictional world bc im d biggest slut for him)

A complete lie, you just did not want to deal with college fuck boys.

The man in front of the class was practically pouring his heart out into the lecture. The chalkboard was filled with white letterings from left to right, not knowing where to start as you take down notes.

“It is important to keep in mind that bimolecular structure and function are dictated by the properties of the medium in which they are dissolved,” your professor explains while continually pacing from one end to the other among the students seated at the first row.

You decided to seat around the middle to the last row, knowing it was the least obvious way for other students in the class to notice how much you fawn over your Organic Chemistry professor rather than the subject itself.

Honestly you could listen to him talk for hours. All those information he had been discussing would not actually process through your thoughts. You knew that better than anyone.

But who honestly would invalidate your reason? Everyone can probably relate to hating Chemistry, no matter what subcategory it is.

Considering that this was probably one of the most difficult courses you had in your program. You were just thankful and lucky enough you landed on one of the hottest professors amongst the campus.

“Hey what did Professor Lehnsherr say about the problems during synthesis of proteins?” Peter asks.

In spite of being fortunate about everything else about this subject, you were not quite happy about Peter Parker following you around like a lost puppy. Especially during the classes you both have alike.

The boy constantly asks so much questions as if you were the teacher already. In addition, he seemed smart enough to figure things out yet somehow he keeps on bugging you for reassurance.

You did not want to be rude. He has not done anything to completely deserve your rage, however he was definitely getting on your nerves.

Honestly you would not want to be infuriated over his consistent queries, but you were just as distracted as he was, maybe even more. With this, you were looking dumber to him each day.

To anyones pride, it was probably a kick in the stomach. You knew you were not the brightest in this class, but it was best to leave the information to yourself. No need for anyone to point out how mindless you were.

And you really were not. You had other Science subjects you totally excel at. Sadly, Chemistry was just not one of them.

“Well, uh, I don’t think I got that part either.” You look aside where he was seated and awkwardly smiled at him before mentioning an apology, “Sorry, Peter.”

In return, Peter smiled at you and dismissed the question. You were not so sure whether to forget about it or take even the least bit of offense. You felt a little mocked by how easily he did it and innocently he smiled, but maybe you were just overthinking this through.

“It’s fine,” he tells. “I just didn’t get the third bullet, but I’ll try to review it in the textbook when I get home.”

“Oh okay, sure.”

“Speaking about reviewing,” Again, Peter tries to start another discourse.

“I was wondering if you got reviewers for the upcoming text for next week? We all know how difficult Professor Lehnsherr’s exams can get, right?” He lets out a forced chuckle, assuming it could lighten the mood.

As much as he tried to make small talks with you, almost everyday, today you really feel like you did not want to return the favor. Especially after having to bring up the test next week.

“I don’t really make reviewers, I usually just scan the books I have at home.”

Lies. You probably have a box full of index cards and sticky notes in your room.

You tried to use every studying tips every corner of the Internet could give. All those study-life hacks that really did not help much but pile up to your disorganized state of mind.

You fucking tried to study Chemistry. You really did.

“What, you don’t?!” He suddenly exclaims, not realizing the loudness of his voice as it almost caught the attention from people at front. “You seem to be busy all the time though. It’s like I always catch your writing or reading something in class.”

Maybe your mood was just off but it definitely seemed weird for him to say that. Though, you did not want to make something from what he said. It was not worth your time.

“I guess people are not always what they seem to be, yeah?”

Again, Peter gives out that soft chuckle and smile, “Then I guess so. You do make a point.”

He does not argue with you any further.

“Can I at least borrow your Physics book? I only bought Chemistry and Biotech for the semester. Didn’t know they would actually utilize it for once,” he scoffs.

At first you hesitated. You were reviewing for it too, but you already felt bad for being no help whenever he asks a question and often times disregarding him when your mood if off. Plus, you did just make it look like you were not much of a study-freak.

“Okay.”

He instinctively fist pumps the air and looks at you with a wide, grateful grin. “Thank you so much. You’re a lifesaver, Y/N.”

“Don’t mention it.” You grab the book he needs from your bag and hands it to him. He accepts it and places it inside his while also clearing the rest of his things.

Looking at his digital wristwatch wherein he raised his index finger up as if he figured something out of it, he says, “He’s going to dismiss the class in a few minutes. We should get ready for Cell Biology next period.

Oh how you hated it. Were you jumping to conclusions? Or was this boy really trying to be too close with you? Or was he just being nice and informing you to prepare ahead?

God, you did not give Peter Parker the right to cloud up your thoughts like this.

“Thanks,” you say, “but I need to talk to Professor Lehnsherr after class. Have to, uh, consult him about my concept paper that he made us submit last week.”

As he tidies his notebooks up and carelessly shoves it inside his backpack, he immediately looks back at you with a confused expression, “Oh, I can always wait for you–”

“It’s fine, Peter. Thank you though.” Two of your hands were instinctively waving in front of you, a meek gesture for him to stop coddling you or whatever move he had been trying to make at you.

“Are you sure? I–”

And if you were ought to be saved further from lashing out over Peter’s incessant attempts, you finally heard the words any student was longing to hear. “Class dismissed. I’ll see you all on Monday.”

“Eri–err, Professor Lensherr just dismissed the class. Better catch up to him before he heads out,” you hurriedly said. And with a loud slam from your notebook, you quickly shut him out. In addition, you practically shoved every thing in front of you into your bag without sparing a second glance.

One strap of your back was slung over your shoulder as you hurriedly flew down the aisle. Professor Lehnsherr was midway into packing his things before you interrupted and approached him.

“Professor,” you call out. “I have a question. About the paper I handed in last week.”

“Uhuh.” He faintly furrows his eyebrows, trying to hide his already obvious bewilderment. “I forgot which assignment was that, Ms. Y/L/N.”

There were students still exiting in class. So you tried your best to make your conversation with him less suspicious. He was most likely doing the same.

“It was about the Chemistry-proposal thing.” You snapped your fingers a few times as you gathered your train of thought, but realizing it was not going effectively. “Well I just wanted to confirm it since, you know, I was hoping for any feedback from you throughout this week.”

“I’m not sure if I have read it. I’ve certainly been busy this week,” he clarifies. “Nonetheless, we can talk about it later. Thank you for bringing it up. I’ll make sure to follow it up in my schedule, Ms. Y/N.”

Both of you made your way out the door once there were only a minuscule amount of students left in class. You probably had been looking at your professor with gushing stares, but you doubt the other people in the room could notice it. They were farther away from where both of you stood, much less would they be able to hear what the two of your were talking about.

“Oh thank you so much, sir!” You almost cried out and jumped in joy while reaching through the threshold. Moreover, you composed yourself before mumbling out, “I’ll see you later, Eric.”

In which you were certain no one would have heard it besides him.

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

“I’m sure you’ll get a good grade in the exams, Y/N,” Eric leans back to his seat with a humble smile upon his face.

“Really? I doubt so, there’s a kid in your class that keeps bugging me out to a study date, or whatever you call it,” you sneer. You lick your lips as you finish taking a sip around the wine glass, setting it down and looking back at the man you were having dinner with. “It’s getting very annoying though, he surely knows how to get on my nerves.”

“I’m sure he’s just trying to flirt with you, like any other college boys do.” He optimistically and maturely lays out the options. “It’s pretty normal for anyone to chase someone they are fond of, especially for young adults like you.”

It was a pretty obvious sign that he was trying to let his message reach you.

“Well, I apologize for my standards of men,” you say. “I just want to skip the whole heartbreak in college and character development. All that stuff you usually see in a typical teen romance movie.”

You sigh, looking down and saying, “I already found a man for me. Why would I stoop down for some guy who’s most likely wanting something from me, and dumping me once he got what he wanted.”

“Y/N, I don’t blame you for liking men that’s ten years older than you,” Eric assures. “But I want you to realize that you still have a lot to look forward after graduating

“And I look forward for you too!” You tried to not raise your voice, though having dinner in his house wouldn’t really catch anyones attention. “I can’t wait to finally graduate from second semester and be able to spend more time, publicly, with you.”

“Yes, I understand, honey.” He places his hand over yours as he tries to calm you down. “Like I said, I just want you to make sure that you’ve clearly thought this through.”

Eric adds, “There’s plenty of men out there. I don’t want to take away your opportunity of experiencing something new at such a young age.”

“I’m turning twenty-four! I promise you I’m thinking everything through.” Your voice was much weaker than a few seconds ago. The evident tone of strength fades even with one glance from the man in front of you. You felt yourself shrink in your seat. But you were sure he does not intend to frighten you into compliance.

“Sorry,” you pout. “Didn’t mean to raise my voice.”

“I understand, and I won’t pressure you any more tonight, okay?” He tries to uplift your mood, detecting quickly the shift of the room’s atmosphere. “You deserve a good dinner tonight, like I promised, sweetie.”

His smile made you calmer. It was then that you realized why you were attracted to a man like him even if he was still your teacher.

The way he handles you in any given situation so sensibly. Though it may feels intimidating at first, he consequently tries to override the tone of the conversation which cheers you up.

With one hand, he hold yours and gently draws it towards him at the same moment he leans his head down. Eric presses a kiss against the back of your hand and you butterflies immediately fill inside your stomach. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Every doubt you had entirely disappeared now. If there were hints of you hesitating to continue seeing Eric, they were certainly long gone now.

“Let me drive you home after dinner,” he offers, like the gentleman he is.

Eric always does make sure you get home safe. However, you both agreed that he drops you off at least a block away from your house. Just in case people around your neighborhood might catch you, or worse your parents.

It was not like you were ashamed of your relationship with Eric. Cautious was the term.

You were only a few months in seeing him. Fair enough, he was your second semester professor and the both of you met before that period.

You were not only risking the wrath of your parents once they hear you’re dating an older man, let alone your Chemistry teacher. But you were also putting him at risk if ever his faculty finds out.

Eventually, the two of you pack up and end your conversation. Other than talking about college, the two of you also talk more about yourselves which has progressed you into learning more about each other’s personalities and likes.

He helps you out of his house and into the passenger seat of his car. It had been more than thrice wherein he drove you home, and the familiar scent of leather and the typical Glad air fresheners has clung onto your nose. You strap on your seatbelt on just as he was getting inside the driver’s side.

The ride was not entirely dead silent. Eric made a few more small talks before finally turning a right which was where he usually drops you off. It amazes you how instantly he remembered the way to your home, as you instructed him the first time.

“Thank you for tonight, like always, Eric.”

As always, you made your way out of his car prior to giving him a kiss. You only had to walk straight ahead, glancing at your home which had one dim light illuminating through one window.

Upon entering the house, you figured your parents were already asleep and a hint of the living room lamp was present. Taking the benefit of not having to be interrogated by anyone, you rushed upstairs to your bedroom, turned on the lights, and immediately closed the door behind you with a sigh of relief. A smile was also visible after recalling your night with Eric.

As you made your way towards your bed, a piece of paper lays obvious in the middle of it. Your sheets were flattened and tidied, so you could obviously detect when something is placed on top of it. You have no memory of leaving it early in the morning before you left too.

When picking the paper up, you realized it was a piece of polaroid film. Its back was facing you, having no idea what to expect at the front.

At that point, the smile from your face turned into horror and all the color in you basically drained away.

The picture displayed you and Eric at one dinner night out from a few days ago, you still remember. It could have been anything but malicious, but the way his hand was intertwined with yours as both of you laugh away without worries. It was clear as day, the light shining perfectly at the both of you. Anyone can conclude what was happening in the picture.

You did not know this day would come. The picture was taken from Eric’s home to prevent such things like this from happening. So it puzzled you just as much at it terrified you.

This was definitely someone who had been stalking either one of you. It was not a mere instance like paparazzis who catch celebrities dating on the streets of New York.

Someone definitely have been observing the two of you.

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

Days have passed, a week almost. Examinations are scheduled for tomorrow.

And you prayed that the picture you received would be the only thing terrorizing your dreams. But you were completely wrong.

From thereon, you started to receive more pictures, specifically one every morning and night, from your past hangouts with Eric. It were simple shots but had the power to completely jeopardize either one of you, mostly him at stake though.

It was obvious that the person behind this was definitely observing the two of you for a while. Probably even during the most earliest weeks when your relationship with him started.

Though it may seem unfair, you did not mention anything about it to Eric. It was enough the he was keeping with you, his job, and himself private – which clearly was not working out so well. You felt like it was your responsibility to handle this situation. You were so sure you did not try to publicize anything and kept it on the low.

Nevertheless, it was out there. Eric had not mentioned anything so you assumed he did not receive a picture like you did.

Currently, you were seated at the farthest row at the back of the room, somewhat near the corner. Physics was your last subject and you could not wait but finally leave.

In addition, you texted Eric that you would not be seeing him until after the exams. It was an easy excuse not to see him, saying that you wanted to focus on studying for it; however, you knew that you would just be busy thinking about the creepy stalker gallery you have been receiving.

“Hey.” Unsurprisingly, a familiar voice whispers next to you which disrupts your heavy train of thoughts. “You finished studying for tomorrow? I’m about to end my review with Chemistry later.”

“Cool.” Probably the one of the most basic replies in the universe. “I haven’t finished studying, I’m kind of dealing with a lot of things recently.”

You made sure to generalize your answer, but enough for him to sympathize and at least give you some space.

“Oh, sorry to hear about that.” Peter frowns. He takes his seat a few desks away from your left, leaving you to continue thinking. You were thankful for his gesture too.

Surprisingly enough the boy barely bothered you for the entire lecture. You were still engrossed on finding out whoever was stalking you, even so dating back to boys you evidently rejected during the first semester – who badmouthed you immediately afterwards. There were not a lot of names, so it was easy to remember who was who.

You traced back to each boy and remembered what they said after you told them you were not ready to enter a relationship – a complete lie, you just did not want to deal with college fuck boys.

Just as you expected from any of them, rumors have spread out about you which was mostly shaming you physically or mentally. Some were milder insults than the other yet at the end of the day you did not care.

“Fuck,” you whisper to yourself. “Who was that boy at Liz’s party.”

Your eyes were sealed shut, recalling a list of names while using your thumb and middle finger to massage your temples. It was getting frustrating and mentally exhausting.

After some time, you had so much word filling in and our of your brain that you were not aware that your own name was being called. Your heart practically skipped a beat after hearing it the first time, assuming that you were being called to recite an answer. But you became content after seeing that it was just Peter, who started tapping your arm to get your attention.

“Huh?” You lightly shake your head before turning your head aside.

“Oh, class was dismissed a few minutes earlier than usual–”

“Don’t forget to answer the assignment regarding thermodynamic concepts found it the book. You’ll hand it in immediately on Wednesday.” The professor addresses the class as they were already carrying their bags and themselves out the room.

You start placing your stationeries inside yours, packing your other things up until it was only a pair of earphones and your phone left in front. Peter stood near the aisle while looking at you just as you were zipping your bag shut.

“Oh shoot, I’m so sorry, Y/N,” he states out of nowhere causing you to furrow your eyebrows at him. “I forgot I still haven’t returned your Physics book I borrowed last week.”

Nodding your head and standing up, you shrug it off. “It’s fine. You can return it tomorrow.”

“Sure, but how will you do your Physics assignment?”

Oh yeah. Your professor literally reminded the class a few seconds ago.

“I think I might be able to do it overnight. How many pages is the task?”

“Eight, or nine I think.” He frowns looking very guilty at you.

“Shit,” you swore. That was a lot of pages than the usual assignments given.

“Yeah, professor said it could help add points if you somehow get a bad grade at the tests.”

“Never mind,” you tried to set his mistake aside. “I’ll try to do it within overnight tomorrow. I can ask for help from my friend tomorrow morning and–”

“Wait! I realized you can stop by my apartment to get it.”

“Oh–er, Peter, I don’t think I have time to–

“It’s just nearby the campus, I promise,” he assures and adds, “it wouldn’t be a hassle, it’s probably on your way home anyway so it won’t make a difference.”

“Uhm.” You were doubtful of him.

However, you did realize that you did not have anything to do after class. You were keeping distance with Eric for the meantime which meant that your schedule was mostly vacant after this.

“Please,” he begs, “I feel so bad for keeping it the whole week. I swear it’s like a few blocks from here.”

“Would it take more than twenty minutes?” You purse your lips, convincing yourself that you would rather force yourself to study at home than spend it at someone’s apartment.

“I only take around ten minutes to walk so,” he answers. “Unless you’re a slow walker, of course.” The tone of his voice seeming to be joking.

Again, he pleads. This kid will not fucking budge.

“Fine,” you blurt out. Though, you realized your sudden-almost lash out moment at the boy that you made sure to reiterate it but slower, “I mean, sure. I can stop by your apartment to pick up my book.”

An awaited smile and sense of agreement washes over you.

Peter then leads the way as you walked behind him, maintaining a short distance so people would not throw out any suspicious looks. Like in every college, everyone knows just how fast gossips formulate and rumors spread.

If you think about it though, it might avert anyone’s suspicion – mainly pertaining to your creepy stalker – with you and your Professor. But you were not prepared for that yet, maybe some time when you can finally think about its consequences through.

True to his word, as the both of you exited the campus, it took a short time before the boy in front of you told that you were about to enter through the entrance to the building of his apartment. You were not so sure if it was really a momentary walk or because you were so focused on thinking and keeping a distance.

At some points he did often look back in case you got lost from following him. Plus, like always, he asked you simple questions either about your day or your subjects to make small talk. In which case, you were barely answering him but definitely progressed compared to when he attempted for previous times during class.

In addition, as the two of you walked down the block, the number of faces you could only assume was in college decreased. Meaning that the glares at you eased up.

“Well, here’s my location.” A loud huff follows as he uses a key to unlock the door for the entrance to the building, “It wasn’t that far, was it?”

“Yeah, I guess it wasn’t that far.” You agree as he holds the door for you and then walks right after you.

As Peter leads you upstairs onto around the fourth level, he proceeds to walk along the corridors. The array of same beige colored doors with small golden indents of unit numbers paraded along it too. Eventually he stops and inserts a key into the lock, twisting it until hearing the unlocking sound.

For a moment you hesitated to follow him. You just wanted your book and you were sure he can give it to you on a shorter span than your walk from campus to here. Was it that troublesome?

Entering his complex, you discovered how minimalistic it looked. To be fair it seemed quite small, the living room instantly greeting you through the entrance and a kitchenette at the side. But since his things were tidied up, it looked roomy.

You instinctively close the door behind you, slightly aware that it did not create a locking sound. Following Peter, you took a few more steps until you stood still at the passageway between his living room and entryway.

“Do you want a drink?” Peter asks.

“No thank you.” You were still trying to subtle. “I just want my Physics book, Peter. Please?”

He looked at you and paused for a split second. You could feel the frown behind the expressionless look. “Yeah. Okay. Sure,” he nods for a few times before turning around and proceeding to a seemingly narrow hallway. “I’ll get it in my room. Be back in a second.”

Your feet faintly paced back and forth, still where you stood a few meters between the entrance and living room. After a few more minutes, Peter emerges carrying the familiar book with one hand.

He approaches you within a few stops but stops in his tracks, leaving a distance from you. “Well uh,” he starts as his chin was tucked.

“I just want to tell you something before I hand you back your book.” He looks up at you with really pleading eyes. During other instances in university, you were definitely familiar with that look. However, this one probably ranked as one of the most downhearted ones.

You did not want to feel regretful for him. Though it definitely feels like you just kicked a puppy.

“Was is it?”

“I love you,” he blurts out as his face goes back from hiding and looking down.

It seemed awkward. You were somewhat expecting it, but you were also hoping that this day would not come – or not at least until you graduate and leave the university.

“Oh.” You honestly did not want to react.

Were you going to say sorry? How about thank you? Would it be better if you said you did not like him back? Or will the best response be that you are already taken?

“Peter, I–”

“Are you really dating Eric?” He shots up with eyes appearing almost teary.

What. The. Fuck.

“No,” you mutter. It was not much of an answer to his question. It was more on being quite horrified as your mind started jumping to conclusions.

The amount of things running around your mind right now was immeasurable.

Firstly, anyone could make two and two out of what he said, especially knowing that no one knows it even so around your circle of friends.

Secondly, you should have thought better. Your doubts with Peter should have been grater and you totally underestimated him. However, some part of you prayed that he was just an annoyingly awkward nerd who follows his friends regarding flirting tips.

Lastly, you turned around and ran.

You probably got your way with opening the door and taking two steps out. It was not long before you felt arms wrap around your waist and either side of your arms. You were then lifted and pulled behind while you tried to kick at the air as an escape. Did not work though.

Peter was surprisingly stronger than you thought. He already seemed fairly muscular at class, hiding behind those long sleeved sweaters and flannels.

Eventually the last thing you remember was the image of the door of his apartment open while you get sucked into the room further. Everything went black afterwards.

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

When you felt that you were slowly restoring to consciousness, you were aware of the pounding at the back of your head and your arms.

You tried to move your hands, wanting to press against the parts of your body that were aching. But you felt incapacitated as your wriggled your wrists around and felt an unfamiliar sticky fluid enveloping around them.

“Glad you’re awake,” a voice says. “Does your head hurt?”

You tried to open your eyes, the dark lighting of the room not cooperating with your vision. A light from the window and a lamp were the only things that helped you form something out of the void.

From there you saw Peter Parker sitting closely beside you at the edge of the bed.

Hell please let this be a nightmare.

“What–” You groan, “What do you want from me.”

Your mind was building up your anger yet your body says otherwise. You felt exhausted and heavy.

Peter shushed you in a caring manner, “We’ll talk when you feel better. I’ll let you get more rest okay, sweetie?”

“Uhh.”

That was what you could remember the most. If you have awoken for other times in between your sleep, then you surely did not have an idea of it.

When you finally woke up, the level of your grogginess felt little to none already. You looked around and saw that the room was still dark and seemingly still nighttime.

As your head was twisting from side to side, you saw Peter appear from the doorway carrying a translucent cup filled with water in one hand. “Hey, you’re finally awake.”

Instead of replying to him, your wrists writhe beneath the fluid that you are still not familiar of. You could not really look up to get a good view of what it was, but it was wet, sticky, and felt like super glue.

On the other hand, both your legs, ankles, and feet were free. The back of your thighs bounced against the bed as you struggled, but it would not do much since your arms were practically stuck.

“Fuck,” you grumble.

“That won’t help. You’re pretty much stuck there,” he says, Then he takes a seat at the edge of the bed, alike where you remembered him positioned from earlier, “Might as well talk to me until I let you go.”

“Okay then, when will you let me go?” Your voice was calm hoping you could talk your way out of this mess.

“If you behave for me like a good girl, okay?”

Shivers went up your spine as you cringed at his statement.

Immediately, your mood shifts from calm to furious after hearing his disturbing bargain. Then purposely rolling your eyes for him to see. “How the hell will I behave if you’re a creepy stalker! You disgust me!”

Peter hums, displaying a look wherein he seems like he was thinking. You were not sure if it was sarcastic or not, either way it annoyed the hell out of you. “Creepy stalker sounds overstated, it was more on being curious.”

You scoff as well as exclaim, “You sent me photographs of me and Eric at his house! Fucking hell, Peter.”

“Oh yeah that part.” He slyly pouts his lips to the side as he comes to realize what he had done, “I guess it was a bit creepy–” “What do you mean a bit? That was invasion of privacy!”

Despite being trapped, both your hands balled into a fist, feeling very furious at his dense answers. “I was living my own life! I kept my relationships to myself,” you cry out.

“Yes, but you weren’t completely living your life,” he whispers while gently combing his hair through the front of your hair. “You deserve much more than someone who couldn’t proudly tell that you’re his girl. Is he even a man? Do you really enjoy that kind of life, sweetie?”

“We were happy,” you weep. The evident crack on your voice was a signal that you were about to cry though you were not sure if it was because you were held hostage or because you were worried for Eric.

No one would understand your situation with him right now. Especially Peter.

“Trust me you weren’t,” he scoffs. “You deserve so much more, and I can give you that.”

“I’d rather be alone forever than be with you, asshole!” Your voice was inconsistent, clearly affected by how fast Peter’s mood also shifts quickly.

You also figured you were not looking entirely fresh while crumbling beneath him. Drops of tears and sweat were all over your face and neck, both your eyelids felt swollen, and your nose was almost stuffed.

Peter stand from the edge of the bed and advances to his desk from the side. A harsh bang echoed throughout the room as your body twitched out of shock.

“What does that dick have that I don’t?!” He grits his teeth as the curves of his jaw intensifies. A displeased look was written all over his face.

“P-please let me go.”

“I need you to answer, sweetie. We going nowhere unless you answer!” He was never going to let you go if you were not going to cooperate.

Every step he takes closer back to the bed just increases your heart beat further. He had rolled the sleeves of his sweater up to the edge of his elbows and you felt threatened looking at how firm his arms looked.

“Peter, p-please,” you hiccup.

As Peter returns to the edge of the bed, he does not hesitate anymore to keep a distance. His hands hover to either sides over your body and sets the left side of his head on your midriff, laying while also getting a good view of your vulnerable state.

He does not even look life he was struggling to make an effort to keep you down, but you could feel how heavy he was and was barely giving you a chance to move around.

“I can give you so much more, Y/N.” The way his gaze directs at you was definitely one of the creepiest things you have experienced. He had so much emotions yet completely lacked sympathy for your state of mind.

Shutting your eyes, you only cried further. You felt a hand cup one of your cheeks as its thumb wipes away the pouring tears. Like a broken record, you only pleaded more, “Please let me go.”

“I can’t.”

“Why.” You bawled, realizing he has no plans of releasing you anytime soon despite it. “I won’t tell anyone about this, I p-promise.”

“I know that,” he says, “but you’re going to run back to Eric, probably tell him too, right?”

You did not want to answer, merely shaking your head as you resisted a cry from your lips. It was somewhat what you had planned, but now you were just scared shitless.

“You won’t tell anyone but him cause no one knows about it other than you two, right?” He corners your words.

“Eric would lose his job if someone, especially your parents find out, right?” Hell he was correct. He most likely had been stalking you for so long to find out about it.

“You love him so much, you wouldn’t want to hinde

It was terrifying that someone had been learning about you and your life for a while without your awareness.

“Please stop. What do you want... money?” you whimper.

Peter did not seem likes normal college boy; he does not think like one, too, for sure. Anyone with a right mind would not do something like what he did. No one would have the guts to do so.

“I just want you, Y/N. I want to give you what you deserve,” Peter answers as he sits up and leans his face closer to yours. His mouth leaves a small gap from your right ear as he whispers, “Let me make you feel good.”

“No–”

He cuts off your plea with a proposition, “If you let me, I might consider letting you free.”

“You want that, right? Want me to let you go...” His hand combs through the other side of your face, “just let me show you that I can do way better than him.”

Every ounce of your blood was trying not to give in. You were smart, you ought to find a way out of this. However, you realized that it will not be enough. You already struggled so much from the super glue around your wrists and you could not imagine how much more would it take now that Peter was on top of you.

Eventually you stopped struggling and let him be. There was no way out of this than to let him do what he pleases.

You feel his lips press against your ear first and then progresses over your cheek. His grip around your arms loosen after detecting that you stopped struggling beneath him. You could feel him smile on your skin, “That’s it, relax for me. Good girl.”

His hand reaches to undo your pants as his lips drifted on yours to force their way on making out with you. Another hand then presses under your jaw and throat. “P-Peter,” you choke, feeling lightheaded after being unable to breath properly though your mouth until the grip had loosen.

“Sorry, babe.”

He soon descends from your face to your neck and collar region. You were so sure he was leaving marks on you as you felt him suck and nibble against your skin. Like a controlling asshole he was, you expect to see bruises on your skin by tomorrow.

Despite having your hands fastened, he still moves your shirt upwards past your head. It halts and hands loosely around your arms as you emerge topless beneath the boy.

“Fucking beautiful,” Peter compliments your body under his breath.

Although he seemed to have time on his hands, he does not leave a second wasted. He also goes to haul your pants past your legs and ankles. The growing look of impatience on his face says it all.

Peter moves from your side and welcomes himself between your legs. He spreads them out to have enough space for his body and you could not feel more embarrassed than this.

You grit your teeth over each other as you felt him press fingers against your cunt. Instinctively, you clench around nothing as he continues to play with your entrance, making sure you get entirely soaked under his touch.

“You know you shouldn’t hold back. I know you’re loving it so far, your body says otherwise,” he teases before laying on his stomach and moving his head closer to your pussy.

Without a warning, he licks a strip of you making the back of your thighs quake lightly. Peter senses your reaction and continues to do so, using his tongue to play around and poke inside of you until you were slowly giving in without even realizing it.

Just as you thought you were getting used to his actions, he then inserts fingers inside you, feeling your warmth around it as he pushes it in and out.

“Oh,” you moan.

He continues, making sure he also does not leave your bud of nerves behind. The tip of his fingers and tongue alternate on playing against it, making you throw back your head out of pleasure.

“I bet he doesn’t please you like this,” he scoffs.

Eventually, at your vulnerable state, you could already feel yourself closing to an orgasm. Your toes curled as your temples throbbed, sealing your eyes shut as you accepted on giving in.

You bit onto your lower lip, trying to resist a moan. Somewhere inside you, you were still trying to fight back and not let Peter have the satisfaction he had been craving.

“You’re being so tight... Just let it out.” He coaxes and you hate how you did what he told you so.

The extensive grin on his face seemed priceless. He pulled back and you were aware that you seemed exhausted beneath him. You assumed he was done with whatever he wanted to do with you.

But when he started to take off his sweater and unbutton his pants, you realized it was far from over.

As he presents himself just as naked in front of you, he again welcomes himself between your legs. This time you get a better view of him and his muscles and abs. He gets a good view of your body too for sure as his hand reaches to start stroking his dick.

He places one hand on your thigh and pushes it farther to give him more room. Finally, he inserts in inside you and you automatically felt him throbbing between.

There was a growing heat between the both of you, and it only intensified as Peter started to thrust his hips forward and backwards. There was not even a rhythm from him as he moves harder after hearing you softly moan underneath.

The slapping sound echoes through the room that would eventually reek of sex and you felt ashamed that your body was enjoying all of this.

“Ah… ah… ahh… agh….”

“You’re starting to enjoy this, aren’t you?” He brags as one hand was reaching for your breasts while the other holds your thigh up. “Fucking slut.”

Your body and mind were tired and could only hold so much longer. It was not a surprise when your stomach started to churn your the muscles in your thighs were cramping up.

Peter did no help after seeing you starting to wear out. He tried leaning in to make out with you and expect to moan into his mouth. You did for a moment, a combination of both your drools were streaming down from the corner of your mouth.

“We’re making a mess, huh,” he mumbles. “But I know you’re already a dirty fucking girl.”

He proceeds to deprave you with statements, “Can’t believe you’re enjoying my cock better than that old man’s... Such a fucking whore.”

You twist your head aside, trying to hide the fact that you feel like your temperature were burning up. You were so sure he could feel the increasing warmth of your walls either way.

Your eyes were rolling back as you resist arching your back, which was not really a success as the amount of pleasure was overwhelming.

As you writhe beneath him, you felt a hand on your cheek. It pushes your head back onto looking at front and at Peter. “I want you t look at me when you’re going to cum, sweetie,” he orders and you could not do much anyways.

The second time you came was a whole other level. You never felt this with any person you slept with so far, rather not this fast and intense to say. “That’s it, fuck, you’re tighter than I could ever imagine.”

Peter continues until it was his time to cum. The bed continues to move along with his pace and your body was basically abused to his liking.

And even if you were not aware of it, the boy was practically thankful that his agency decided to agree to soundproofing his whole apartment – his motive being for personal reasons, which they did not question any time soon.

You were helpless, you knew that. All you had in mind now was rest. Your eyelids were heavy and your mind was drifting to slumber.

The last thing you remember was Peter moving over your body to come all around your chest like a painter with its paint brush creating a masterpiece from your chest to your core.

“I love you.”

a/n: ily pls leave comments <3

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kylos · 5 years ago

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Finding high quality film/tv rips, saving the large files, and screencapping them are half the battle for gifmakers when setting out to make a gifset. Here’s a little guide on this process, including my advice on

Where to download stuff

Where to store your movies/shows

Screencapping programs

Making gifs as HQ as possible, including tips for picking out what to download when you have multiple options (not all 1080p rips of the same movie or tv episode are the same quality and I explain why)

Why screencaps of 4k movies can look weird and washed out and how to fix that

and more

✨ You can find my gifmaking 101 tutorial here and the rest of my tutorials here.

Where can I download movies and shows?

First off, I prefer direct downloading rather than torrenting stuff because it’s faster and with torrenting, there’s more of a risk. Other people downloading the same torrent can see your IP address. This means movie studios can find out you’re downloading their content and can send you a warning letter. The download speed also varies depending on how many other people are seeding it. I would only do it if it’s your only option and you have a VPN or something.

This is THE best guide for pirating I’ve ever seen. I use it for finding sites for books, music, you name it. The part of the guide you’d want to look at is where it says Direct Downloads Link (DDL) sites. My favorite place is Snahp. These ddl sites will have links to their movie/tv rips that are typically hosted on one of these two sites: google drive or mega.nz. You can download stuff from both of those sites for free, but with mega, they have a 5GB file download limit unless you have a premium account. I personally pay the $5 a month membership for mega because it’s worth it imo. You can buy a subscription through the mega app found on the iphone app store (so you’re billed through apple and it’s less scary than giving a random site your credit card info lmao) and as for androids I think mega has an app on there too.

So basically, if you go to http://snahp.it, they’ll have rips for different movies and shows.

You click on the movie title and it’ll take you to a page where they have links for the video which they have uploaded on a variety of sites (including mega).

How do I make my gifs as HQ as possible?

It’s best to gif things that are 1080p. And usually the higher the file size, the better. A really important thing to note is that not all 1080p bluray rips are the same. The piracy groups that rip these files take uncompressed .mkv rips from discs that are anywhere from 10gb to like 50gb, and then run that through video converters to compress the file down so that they’re 2-8gb. Sometimes when that happens, the video quality goes down a LOT. The same goes for TV episodes. One rip could be 800mb, the other could be 3gb and both could claim to be “1080p” but the quality would be NOTICEABLY different. Your best bet is to always pick the rip with the highest file size.

I’ll show you an example with this scene from You’ve Got Mail.

I downloaded 2 different 1080p rip versions of the film. Both claim to be 1080p, but one is 2.41 GB and the other is 9.75 GB. After taking screencaps, it’s obvious that there’s a BIG difference in quality.

(these pictures are best viewed on desktop tumblr)

When it comes to Blu-ray rips, download remux versions of films and shows if possible. Remux means .mkv files that are uncompressed and straight from a Blu-Ray disc. Giffing remux rips cuts down on the possibility of seeing pixel-y effects a LOT in my experience. It’ll take a bit longer to download than typical 1080p rips but it’s worth it imo.

For TV episodes, if you can’t find a Blu-Ray rip, uploads with the word AMZN in it are usually the highest quality and your best bet (unless you see another upload that’s higher in file size - again: always try to pick the highest file size). 'AMZN’ means they’re from a person that ripped the episode from Amazon Prime Video.

Also, even better than 1080p is 4k (2160p). I only really recommend this though if you know you’re going to gif something up close and crop it a lot - like if it’s a big 540x540px close-up gif of a person. You’ll REALLY see the difference if it’s a 1080p vs 4k rip in that situation. I usually don’t bother with giffing 4k files unless it’s the case above because my laptop lags when taking 4k screencaps and it takes longer to load them into photoshop (4k screencaps are usually about 60mb each!)

⭐️ Another thing that’s important is making sure that when you actually make your gifs, you set them to the correct speed (.05 for movies and most shows, and .04 sometimes for reality tv and live broadcasts). Here’s my gif speed guide. Having the right gif speed is really important for making a gifset HQ. You don’t want it to look too slow or too fast.

What’s your favorite video player to take screenshots with?

MPV player, hands down. And I’ve tried a TON of programs over the years. I’ve tried KMPlayer and found that it added duplicate frames (and even missing frames) which is horrible, and I’ve tried GomPlayer which is.....I’m just gonna say it, I’m not the biggest fan of it. It’s a little overly complicated in my opinion and it has ads. If you like these programs, more power to you! Use whatever you’re comfortable using. I just like MPV the most because it doesn’t have ads, it’s simple, you can take sequential screencaps with a keyboard shortcut, and it can play 4k movies.

Screencaps I take of 4k 2160p movies look so dull and washed out, like the colors aren’t right. Why is that?

That’s because your computer can’t handle HDR 4k video files. It probably can handle SDR 4k video files, but unfortunately, 99% of 4k rips out there are HDR.

[picture source]

Now, HDR displays just fine on computers that have 4k-HDR capabilities, but most older computers don’t have this ability. Having said that, MPV - the video player I mentioned above can take a 4K-HDR video and fix the colors/lighting in real time so it displays correctly AND take screenshots of it with the fixed colors. If you have an older version of MPV, make sure you download the newest update for this. In my general gifmaking tutorial, there’s a portion on how to install this program on macs. I also just made a video tutorial on how to install it on pcs here!

High quality TV and Movie rips can take up a LOT of space on my computer. Where do you store your files?

I store them on external hard drives. External hard drives are like flash drives but they have a MUCH higher storage capacity. You just plug them into your computer via a usb cord when you need access to the files and it’s that easy. I have two of these Seagate 4TB hard drives in different colors so I can easily pick out whichever one I need. I have silver for my movies (because it makes me think of “silver screen” lmao and it’s easier for me to remember) and then I just have a blue for shows. Now, external hard drives of this size can be $$$$ but it’s worth it imo. Look out for when they’re on sale.

What’s the size limit for gifs now?

It’s 10mb! It used to be 3mb and then last year Tumblr upped it to 5mb. Some gifs initially had distortion because of Tumblr’s switch from the .gif to .gifv format, but they’ve fixed the problem AND increased the upload limit to 10mb. Just make sure not to add any lossy to a gif.

Lossy is basically a grain you can add to a gif to lower the file size down. Gifmakers (including myself) used to use this as a trick to get the file size down under 3mb. However, since the .gifv update on Tumblr, any gifs with Lossy added will look distorted like it’s a gif made on a phone app or something.

_________________________________

That’s it for this guide! Again, feel free to check out my other tutorials on photoshop, how to center subtitles, download hq movie trailers, and more ✌️

UPDATE 6/23/20 ⚠️

I’ve gotten an ask about this problem 3 times since I’ve uploaded this tutorial, so I thought I’d add this in. If you are experiencing duplicate and/or missing frames in mpv, it is a glitch with the latest version of mpv. download an older version like 0.29.0. this happened to me on my mac and downloading an older version fixed the problem.

#giffing tutorial #gifmaking #tutorial #mine:tutorial #*

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eohachu · 4 years ago

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RULES: When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours!

I was tagged by Aamna @yibobibo to show the process for this gifset. Thank you so much kleine Maus 🧡 Thank you for showing us your own process!!

Thank you also to @lan-xichens @suibianjie @highwarlockkareena @nyx4 and @aheartfullofjolllly for starting this amazing project 🥰

Let’s get right into it, shall we:

Planning

I never do much planning. Maybe I should tho... I had this set in mind ever since I first saw that WenZhou scene in episode 32. The intimacy instantly reminded me of the two other scenes I included in this set. For some reason there’s always That Scene That Hits Me in danmei live adaptations!!

At first I had planned to do 6 separate gifs but I didn’t like the format so I decided to try overlays! It was my first time blending two gifs together. I think it turned out quite fine.

So I looked for the respective scenes, cut them into clips, and put them through Avisynth. I decided to go quite big so I chose a dimension of 540x400. (Usually my gifs are 540x370.)

I save all the clipped out scenes in a folder inside the folders for the respective dramas.

Creating

So, for the first gif I first imported the two clips separately. Then I deleted the extra frames for each one and sharpened them (also separately). For sharpening I use this action that includes converting them into smart objects. I mostly use the “Sharpening V1″ option, sometimes if it looks good also “Sharpening V2″.

Now I duplicated the Yunlan part of the gif (left side) onto the Shen Wei part. I tried the “Lighten” blending mode like HanYi explained in her tutorial, but it wasn’t right for what I had in mind lol. So I simply set the blending mode back to normal and added a mask to one of the gifs:

And I blacked out the area where I wanted the underlying gif to show up. So now it looks like this:

A bit sad, isn’t it? So in the next step I went through my usual colouring process: Brightness/Contrast, Curves, Levels (sometimes I use them, sometimes I don’t), Vibrance, Selective Color, Hue/Saturation. The biggest problem was to make the skin color vibrant but not too yellow or pink (somehow I always ended up with either of these).

(I’ll be honest, I don’t usually change this much. I don’t normally touch whites and neutrals at all. It’s just that this gif was pretty difficult to colour ksfhsdkjf)

This is what it looks like now:

I definitely wanted to include typography here, which is also something I did for the first time heh. So I’m sure there’s easier ways to do this but alas, here is how I did it:

I added a text layer and typed in the quote. I wanted to go for something simple so I turned to the good ol’ Verdana font. I wanted it to look like a box, so I played around with the space bar and manually adjusted the spaces between letters which you can do where the little VA symbol is:

After I was done with all my gifs (lmao) I decided I wanted to add the quote in hanzi too, as a transparent layer in the background. So I looked up the quotes in Chinese, pasted them into another text layer and set the blending mode to soft light. I also played around with font size and spaces. The font I used is one of PS’s pre-installed ones called FZShuTi.

Added the watermark, and done!! Then I repeated basically the same process for the other two scenes, except that I didn’t need to blend two gifs together for the last one. I had to adjust the layers for colouring individually since they are three different shows with different lighting, setting, and colouring and I wanted it to look at least a bit consistent (🥵).

Special thanks to Kareena who helped me point out some problems I had!!

Posting:

Yeah so I’m pretty impatient when it comes to posting but I queued this one to post in the evening as I do for most of my content. I loaded the gifs into a photo post, added an ID and the Darwish quote. It was quite difficult to find a quote that fit all of these pairings but that one hit me in the face (Mahmoud pls....).

Added the names of the shows and the episode numbers, plus a link to the set that finally convinced me to make this hehe (thank u Aamna).

D O N E !

Tagging:

@aikakuu and this piece of art (srsly one of my favourite XingChen pieces out there ;-;)

@yutaan and this lil Wen Ning!!

@hawberries and this piece that took me out

@shuang-hua and these babies (i know it’s watercolour so no pressure if it’s difficult to make a show-your-process post!!)

@weiwuxian and the juniors <3 (listen my lack of planning is why i could never do this)

#showyourprocess #/ pls no pressure. i know i tagged some peeps that aren't mutuals but i'm geniunely in awe of y'all's are!!#/ thank you for the tag aamna!!#/ if you have questions i'm here just send me an ask <3 #r.jpeg #*mine

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lunar-magnolia · 3 years ago

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@honestlyshamelesscollector thank you for asking me this!! I'm really happy to share my thoughts, I hope to answer your questions in the best way possible akdjsk

I absolutely agree with you about Xie Lian. He does indeed grow a lot, even though he does so in a traumatic way.

***A little disclaimer: these are just my thoughts here, first impressions having read the novel once, plus watched the donghua and read the manhua a couple of times. I'm no expert at all, but I have lots of feelings about this akdjskfmf

**Putting a read more because long lmao

Young Xie Lian's dream was to become a god and save the common people. And present Xie Lian does it everyday, as much as he can. The biggest lesson he got growing up was probably the fact that he can't save everyone at the same time, but saving (or helping) even just one person was enough. He might be a god, but he is still one person. Having godly powers doesn't make him omniscient or give him the ability to suddenly work on a bigger scale than he could when he was human.

Book 4 in particular highlights just how much the present Xie Lian has changed from the Crown Prince that Pleased The Gods, filled with the idealism of a young man and maybe just a little bit spoiled, to the kind and humble Scrap Immortal that does everything in his power to help the people he comes across.

We see him starting to change as soon as book 2 though. When he tries to both save the Imperial Capital from being invaded and save the Yong'an people from the draught, it's the first time Xie Lian faces the limits of his godly status and power. He divides his time to keep it going for a bit, but in the end he's exhausted and overwhelmed, and he can't do it anymore. Even though he is a god. The inevitable consequences of his own actions and the fall of Xianle challenged his idealism and destroyed his heart so hard that he almost gave in and took his revenge on innocent people. But one person is enough, right?

One could argue that Xie Lian never really had it in him to do it, and I'd probably agree. The whole waiting for someone to help him before releasing the curse, and then trying to sacrifice himself when it eventually was too late to avoid it was enough of an indication for me. It only took the kindness of one person to make him change his heart. If he truly sought revenge, one person wouldn't have been enough. And damn if that didn't ruin Bai Wuxian's plans wonderfully lolll

Xie Lian knew in his heart that the people of Yong'an didn't deserve to pay the price for what happened to Xianle. Even though Bai Wuxian tried (and for a while succeeded) to make him believe it.

Straying from the path that Bai Wuxian wanted him to walk was not as easy as it seems. Bai Wuxian carefully paved all the paths for him, pushed Xie Lian in the directions he wanted him to go with the most violent methods I've ever seen, but Xie Lian always found a way to avoid it, also thanks to Hua Cheng's presence, even when he didn't know it was him (I have so many feelings about that imma cry skfjkefj). Hua Cheng always believed in him and knew what Xie Lian was truly capable of, and boy was he right gdi.

When Xie Lian went through the betrayal of Jun Wu, Hua Cheng's presence reminded him of who Xie Lian is and what he's become. The doubts Bai Wuxian put in his mind, the danger of the Human Face Desease threatening to be freed again, and the resolution to not give in into grief and pain and staying true to the person he had become were again overcome thanks to one person. Xie Lian could have never actually become what Bai Wuxian wanted him to, no matter what he threw at him.

In the end, Xie Lian learnt how to save the common people for real. And he realized that didn't have to do it alone! Instead, the common people themselves were part of the solution (the human array to contain the resentful spirits yknow). It does send an important message, and it's probably the most important thing that Xie Lian learnt: that one person alone cannot save all, if all don't want to be saved. It's a group effort, it takes time and heart and not everyone has it in their heart to risk their lives for the sake of others. Godly powers can only do so much, and a god cannot change fate from above. A god must instead support and protect the people, work with them, give them a boost, and in the end the people will save themselves.

It's a really nuanced and complicated process, I don't know how to explain it properly ajdkfjdl.

It's also worth mentioning that the relationship with Mu Qing and Feng Xin had all the potential to prevent much of what happened to Xie Lian. But just as Xie Lian was young and inexperienced, so were they. And despite all, until Xie Lian stopped thinking of them as servants, he couldn't grow. He had to lose them to truly understand the depth and worth of people believing in him. Which doesn't make it any less painful or sad... Things could have indeed gone differently, but the outcome would have never been the same. I'm glad in the end they kind of sorted it out though.

And the fact that Mu Qing and Feng Xin still cared for Xie Lian when he ascended for the third time was so evident in hindsight. Made me smile when I realized.

Also I liked that in the end Xie Lian didn't go rule the heavens or even go back to it, and instead stayed in the mortal realm to continue doing what he did for the past 800 years. Considering that young Xie Lian said clearly that he wanted to become a god, it's an important thing. It shows that in his mind the concept of gods and their role has changed, and he will stick to his new views despite the possibility of achieving what his young self wanted. Though this isn't just a consequence of book 5, it was shown even earlier when he first visited his palace in the heavens. Xie Lian didn't want to enter it, it made him uncomfortable, and instead sat outside waiting for Shi Qingxuan.

There are so many things to say about Xie Lian but idk if I have the competence to express them all akdjskfj I love his character to bits. His development was not banal in any way, and even though we didn't see all the 800 years it took for him to change, we do feel how gradual that was. Just think of when he met Banyue.

He was still a bit idealistic, telling her that his dream was to save the common people, but he already grew enough of a thick skin to understand when it was worth to pick a fight or not, and he wasn't picky on food (even cooking it himself in his helmet, with outrageous results). It might not seem much, but all things considered, it was a change.

In his first banishment he learnt how hard life was without his Crown Prince status, but he still picked fights with people and refused to eat some things because they weren't as high quality as the food he used to eat at the Royal Palace.

During his second banishment, he learnt to be humble and how problems couldn't be solved with just the right idea. He learnt the grayness of morality and life, how right and wrong are not absolute concepts. He experienced the worst fortune (by his own choice) and learnt how to not let it get to him, how to grow enough of a thick skin to get up each time and not take his frustration out on others.

Truly, Xie Lian is a great character. I have read the novel only one time so far, but I'm planning to reread it soon. So who knows, I might notice more things next time around! This was just my first impression Ahah

As for things I wish that were better explored in the story, I'd say Pei Ming's growth and maybe Ling Wen's motives (though I might have just blinked and missed this last part, because I was still reeling from the Black Water arc lmao).

About Pei Ming, I think he went through a considerable growth since the first time we see him, when he tries to save Little Pei from banishment. At first he gave me the impression of being the usual arrogant womanizer, who would do anything to avoid having his reputation tarnished. But blinking to book 5, we see that he's... Idk, it feels like he's taken that shameless arrogance and put it away, especially after interacting with the Rain Master. Their story is extremely important to his development imo. Their shared past held a place in his heart, and it resurfaced when he met the Rain Master again. I think he was deeply signed by her actions in the past, and he never forgot her.

It's shown when Pei Ming refuses to be saved by the Rain Master and refuses the sword she wants to give to her (which incidentally is the same sword that, yknow, she used to sacrifice herself in front of him back in the days). He says (or better, the people around him say) that it was out of pride, because he couldn't accept that a woman saved him. But he never confirmed or denied it, instead he ran after her "to help".

At the end of the story Pei Ming is not as loud and proud of his reputation as he was in the beginning, instead he seems humbled.

I think the Xuan Ji case also had an important role in his development. Considering how we see her dissolve having found peace after talking/fighting with Pei Ming during the Mount Tong'lu arc, I do think that Pei Ming himself must have reflected on himself a bit too.

He also lost his two best friends, Shi Wudu and Ling Wen, so... Yknow, my hualian ship captain must have had some changes.

Especially when it comes to the Rain Master, I feel there are good basis for a good friendship between them, despite the past. The Rain Master never showed open animosity towards him, instead she helped him. It seemed to me that Pei Ming is the one who believed she hated him, but it was never confirmed.

And maybe if you squint there could be more between them, if you're into that ahah. I wish we could have seen more of his grown version, though I do understand that it happened in the epilogue and the book is already as long as it can be ahaha. So really I'm not that sad it didn't happen, I'm happy that there are signs in the background that "hint" at that instead (if they can be considered hints, idk ahha).

About Ling Wen, ehhhh I want to reserve the right to reread and reconsider. Right now I feel like the Brocade Immortal thing was almost unnecessary? I like her background, how she became the biggest civil goddess of the heavens, but I didn't get why she created the brocade. Again though, I might just go back and reread that part later. Tbh I was reeling really hard after the Black Water arc, so I just blanked on some things akfjskf

Did the Brocade serve any purpose in the end? Aside from being the catalyst of Ling Wen's story arc and being one of the two mighty ghosts in Mount Tong'lu (and also giving that nice hualian scene where Hua Cheng was trying so hard to get kissies from Xie Lian ahaha). Idk, I'd like to hear your thoughts about this!!

I think I rambled enough, if you got to this point wow you're amazing! And thank you for going through this long rant Ahah. I hope it makes some sort of sense! Thank you again for the questions, talking about tgcf made me really happy!

#Tgcf #heaven official's blessing #tian guan ci fu #Xie Lian #Thoughts #I have lots of feelings and I can't wait to reread the novel #Gosh truly a masterpiece #So many good points made here and there about so many things #Also Xie Lian my beloved #He deserves everything in the world and he got it in the form of Hua Cheng #I love them so much y'all #Long ass post #Tgcf spoilers

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hopevalley · 4 years ago

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Season 8, Episode 11: Changing Times

Well, as it turns out, my second Covid vaccine kicked me down hard. After sleeping for quite a long time, though, I’m tired of sleeping and ready to try and get this write-up done.

Surprisingly, or...perhaps not so surprisingly, I don’t think I have that much to say about last night’s episode. I think we’re just too close to the finale for me to feel “safe” in guessing/hoping for anything in particular.

Let’s hit up the plot points like before:

The Triangle

Carson & Faith

Rosemary’s Purpose

School District Problems

Jesse’s Disappearance

The Triangle

I’m probably one of the few people who liked Nathan who felt like the whole beginning scene was super weird and uncomfortable. Homegirl held his hand for one second in the last episode and now she’s going to warm his serge by the fire (while he just stands there awkwardly??? He could have done that himself while she got him some tea or something idk) and then dress him???

I think we’re meant to see that as her going back to...I don’t know...old habits die hard or something? But she was barely married for any time at all and it’s been three years since Jack died. No way would she be so far into those old habits that she’d fall back into them with Nathan lmao.

Like, it’d be a REALLY GOOD PLOT for a character who had been married for years and lost a spouse (cough Abigail cough) but considering the circumstances it felt like a cheesy fanfiction! I wanted to like it, but I just felt weird about it. Tonal whiplash out the wazoo.

Especially when we had to watch Lucas drive by and see Nathan’s horse at Elizabeth’s house.

Lucas sadly watching Elizabeth talk to Nathan was also awkward, but at least it gave him the courage he needed to break things off with her.

You’d think I’d have a lot to say about the triangle, but I’m saving all of that for some kind of...post-season discussion. Who is she going to pick? Nathan seems like the most logical writing choice, but it could yet be Lucas. I genuinely don’t care who she chooses so long as she picks someone.

Carson & Faith

I like to hate on these two a lot, so you might be surprised to know that I’m enjoying their storyline. I’ve criticized this series over and over for never bothering to portray realistic relationships and one thing I can say about Faith and Carson this season is that things actually feel...plausible.

I also appreciate how they try to tie Carson into the town a bit more: he talks to Henry and Minnie and even Lucas trying to figure things out! It makes perfect sense to me; how do you choose between someone you care about/the potential life you could make with them, and a career that you’re really and truly passionate about?

This is the most interesting Carson has been since Season 5.

Anyway, the pudding scene was genuinely funny, and a great way to break up the stress that I’m sure we were all feeling about his impending proposal. Faith’s reaction to thinking he might propose was...pretty telling. I really wish they hadn’t saved so many dangling plotlines to solve in the final episode, though. I was hoping Faith and Carson’s storyline would be fully figured out in the penultimate episode so that we could let him go (or whatever) in the season finale. It just seems to me like it would be a good, smooth ending for them.

Also, for what it’s worth, they tried doing this kind of plot with Frank in Season 5, but it was rushed and pulled out of thin air; he’d never shown an inclination toward pastoring toward dying children in the past and it was clear that they just needed to write him off the show. With Carson, this sort of plotline works VERY well; he was a surgeon, and he was passionate about it, but that passion took a hit when his wife needed surgery and she died on the table under his hands. He’s had some time to move on from that and process his feelings, so it makes sense that he’d find that passion again. I just wanted to point this out because it’s interesting how well it works for Carson and how...well, not-well it worked with Frank. I really felt like with Frank, it was just a storyline that could have been given to anyone with the same success rate, whereas with Carson they took a look at the character and what we already know of him, and built the storyline specifically for him. That’s good writing, babes!

Anyway, Carson trying to propose in the vague hope that Faith will come with him, even knowing she doesn’t want to leave Hope Valley, is pretty manipulative and awful, but it really goes a long way toward making his character feel like an actual person. Like yeah, he does actually want the best of both worlds. Do you blame him?

Rosemary’s Purpose

I know a lot of people are really into this storyline but I found it boring. The only good part was when Lee called the other desk in his office “hers.” Everything else just felt like a bit too much to come to the conclusion that she should run a paper. We already had her “advice” column in the paper and it was...amusing while it lasted, but eh. I just don’t see good storylines coming for her from this angle, especially when they went the route of her finding out she wants to start the paper back up to share information with the town. Are we really going to trust Rosemary’s integrity when it comes to writing news stories, especially when MOST of the time the things she’ll be allowed to write about are, you know, who grew the biggest cabbage? It makes me dread the potential for Round Two of Nosy Rosie.

I dunno. I used to really like Rosemary but this season’s been pretty rough on her character. Good for you for wanting to find your passion career, but most of us work so that we can eat, not for a fun way to pass the time and stay busy. :/

School District Problems

Mr. Landis is right and Elizabeth is an idiot. Sure the school board is being assholes for no reason (as if they’d care if one blind child was sitting in a classroom in one western town lol), but Elizabeth’s really going to dismiss his concerns about how she can juggle the added work necessary to teach Angela while also keeping up with everyone else?

It sucks that Angela will get left out, but Elizabeth should be working with Mr. Landis to come up with a plan to teach Angela without sacrificing the education of her other students. Better yet, she could rely on her friends for advice. Like Rosemary.

Still no apology there...

Anyway, a projected 100 new kids? That’s outlandish. The only way that will happen is if they open a factory in Hope Valley, and even then it could take years. I MEAN, WHERE IS THE HOUSING GOING TO BE FOR ALL THE ADULTS THAT WOULD GIVE YOU A HUNDRED NEW STUDENTS LOL. I think we have to assume the plotlines are connected.

I also find it hard to believe the board would care about Elizabeth being certified to teach Angela. Where else is she going to get an education? It’s 1918 in the middle of almost nowhere???

This show drives me nuts with its attempt to be a “Frontier Show” while also shying away from the characters actually being stranded/cut off from society at large. You still had unlicensed teachers teaching in western towns in this time period because nobody cared!!!

ANYWAY, if Union City was like 3 miles away I could see them trying to combine schools. But it isn’t. So.

I dunno. I hate this plotline. I feel like they stole it from a better show (Road to Avonlea, where the bigger school was just a few miles away and it made sense to consider combining the schools for a better education system for the students as one-room schoolhouse teaching was proven to be less effective) but didn’t bother to consider any of the logistics of the storyline.

Maybe it’s my passion for education and history that makes me hate it, though. I know too much to find this storyline believable. I should also mention that I haven’t enjoyed Elizabeth’s role as teacher for a very long time. (I think they suck at writing Elizabeth as a teacher.)

I’m just not interested in wherever this is going to go because I can’t imagine it’ll have a lasting impact.

The only good thing I can say about the whole plotline is that I REALLY LIKED HOW BILL CAME OUT OF IT. I think he’s the only person who knows how to speak to Elizabeth. She struggles with blunt honesty at first, but ultimately tends to appreciate it, and that’s pretty much what she always gets with Bill. Also, the scene where he shuts her down didn’t make her look stupid, either (just worried/anxious), so I could appreciate it.

Jesse’s Disappearance

I couldn’t care less about this plotline if I tried. Jesse’s gone missing in the mountains before (was it last season? I don’t even remember because I didn’t give a damn about it then either) so this felt like a multi-reused plotline...for the same character, no less.

It’s also poorly implemented. Why doesn’t anyone else care about Jesse? Why is Clara pouring her heart out to Lee while her friends are failing to support her in the slightest? Why should any of us care when we know he’ll be fine?

It just feels so forced for the sake of drama, and it’s made 10x worse because there’s too much else going on at the same time.

Also, how convenient that they have to tell us how hard-working and dedicated Jesse is to his work to force this plot to even make sense... C’mon, he has never been a particularly dedicated to work. They just needed to explain why he would have left the car so that he could be “missing.”

Boring. I also don’t care that much about their “stolen” money.

The only good thing in all of this is seeing how soothing of a voice Lee actually has.

The best parts of the episode:

Henry calling Florence “Flo” GOT ME. It was so surprisingly cute???

I love Bill, and he really came out of this episode looking great! Finally, it seems they’re done writing him as a grouchy old man who hates everyone! In this season (and particularly in this episode), he is allowed to be capable, smart, helpful, loyal, and in possession of a great deal of integrity. I couldn’t believe that guy tried to bribe the judge in town right off the bat lmao...but the way Bill handled it felt very in character—very reminiscent of him from S3 or 4. He never shuts things down immediately, preferring instead to get more information to use against his, erm...opponent. Should he need it, of course. I was really happy to see him written well in this episode.

HENRY’S LETTER FROM HIS SON. STARTS OFF WITH “DAD,” AND SAYS PS. I LOVE YOU AT THE BOTTOM. Good for Henry.

Fiona’s backstory! Finally, we get some FIONA LORE. Neat.

PUDDING HANDS CARSON.

#when calls the heart

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hanaasbananas · 4 years ago

Text

Fanfic Year in Review 2020

thanks for the tag @2manyfandoms2count! This took me a while to get to but here we are!

Ok I feel like this is just gonna end up being a post where I just gush about Phantoms in the Dark but like...c'mon

This is gonna get long so i've put it under the cut:

1) List of fics completed this year in the order they were finished:

Most of my stories are one shots of varying lengths, but I did actually finish quite a few so we have:

A Chance Encounter and So it Goes- both zenmaster fics for That 70s Show

Touch the Rain: I honestly forget I wrote this last year, it feels like I wrote it years ago but it's just a standard identity reveal in the heat of an argument type thing.

Ladybug Luck? What's That? The fic that really started my spiral into writing for the ML fandom, and the birth of the Bollywood Playlist series.

Post reveal, where they didn't know each other irl, Marinette sees Adrien at a Gabriel party, realises who he is, and does some property damage in the process.

our eyes speak (but on our lips is silence) At a wedding where Adrien is best man and Marinette is a guest they immediately recognise the other as their partner. Pure fluff and giddiness ensue

The Seduction of Marinette Dupain-Cheng Post reveal-Chat bets Ladybug that he can woo her as a civilian, employing good old fashioned tactics like flowers and poetry

Pink Snapshots of an Adrinette relationship. I just wanted to see if I could write an entire fic with no dialogue whatsoever, and this one got a huge surge in popularity recently so...guess I can!

Exposed Another fic where they don't know each other as civilians. When their identities are revealed in the worst possible way, Ladybug and Chat Noir hide out in a hotel room as they try to process the situation.

This Red Love My first enemies au! In which Adrien joins Hawkmoth from the beginning, but still goes to school and ends up dating Marinette. When he realises who she is, he has to re-examine everything he thought he ever wanted.

i have found someone (like a nomad finds a home) In the last one, Adrien willingly sided with Gabriel, but in this one, he is forced to after Stoneheart. Years later, he meets Marinette, who makes him feel like he isn't a monster.

Memory Chat Blanc in the aftermath when there is nothing left.

Phantoms in the Dark My biggest accomplishment last year! And the longest story I've ever written at 30k words. A historical marichat story based off my favourite poem The Highwayman by Alfred Noyes. I'm currently working on the sequel.

I only bow down to worship (but I come to a stop when I see you) In which Adrien knows Marinette is Ladybug, and she knows he knows. However, he hasn't told her he's Chat Noir. This is just cute relationship stuff in the same vein as Pink

Collect your Courage, Loyalty, I'll never be the thief (to bring in hot scattered hell) Thought I'd branch out to other fandoms and landed on ATLA. This is a series (eventual zutara) where Zuko realises almost immediately post banishment that he can't follow in his father's footsteps and rebels.

Dancing Lessons Chat Noir and Ladybug decided to reveal their identities at age 20, and now Chat has chosen the venue as well. The only problem is he needs to teach Ladybug how to dance first.

Wish Ok I hurt a lot of people with this one but it's one where in the final fight, Adrien is mortally wounded and Marinette uses the miraculous to save his life, forfeiting her life in the process.Flashes back and forth between her death and how Adrien is coping in the aftermath.

2) Number of words written: 79663. I actually wanted to hit 100k by the end of the year but as those in the guild know, I spent most of December doing kitchen renovations and being pissed about my lack of free time lmao

3) Your most popular fic: Phantoms in the Dark. it has yet to surpass my all time most popular fic it's all a game of chance (they say in wonderland), but it's catching up

4) Your personal fav: Dancing Lessons I wrote this way back in July last year but only posted it in December and I just, it's so sweet I really like it with the flirty banter and just the two of them being SO CUTE

5) Your fav scene: The scene at the end of ch6 of Phantoms where Marinette and Chat talk after their kiss and realise they both are very much into each other.

6) A fic or scene that challenged you:

I am really bad at action sequences, and even though in Phantoms Adrien was out fighting people on the regular, I just sort of...glossed over them. Except for in chapter 8, where I wrote a proper duel between Chat and someone he was robbing.

What I struggled with was describing the movements, not wanting to make it too complicated whilst not having it be 'he feinted and stabbed' or something really simplistic. There was a lot of pen acting involved, but I think the end result is quite good, if I do say so myself.

7) A line of writing you’re proud of: From Phantoms (of course)

In every lifetime, in every land, we shall find each other.

8) A comment that touched you:

I love every single comment that I get, but someone left this on my musketeers fic Going Through the Motions (posted as a series on ao3 to motivate me to finish the fic but when it was done I compiled all the parts and posted it on ffnet as a oneshot lol and one of my absolute fave fics I've written-no surprise that it's historical 😅) on ffnet, which was a HUGE compliment:

"I like the way you wove dialogue from the series with your fiction. Your story gives us a more complete picture of Bonacieux and explains why Constance rejected D'Artagnan, which we did not get from the series. Your version is better. Well done!"

9) Something that inspired your writing:

I mean...I have an entire series on ao3 that is just fics inspired by bollywood songs/scenes-and those were my main inspiration for so many things. (I actually realised the other day that a scene from the movie Kalank is what inspired me to write Wonderland lmao)

10) Your proudest accomplishment (that one scene; finally finishing that one fic; posting your first fic; etc):

Honestly, just writing consistently! I graduated in 2019 and in the past, I've started and abandoned so many projects and ideas, and even the first fic I posted on ao3-it took me a year to get the second chapter up and then I only finished it because I wanted to post other stuff but didn't feel like I could until I finished that one lol.

So yeah, that, and of course, actually writing and finishing Phantoms instead of abandoning it like so many of my other ambitious projects. I'm really proud of the 30k I wrote for that story because it's the most I've ever written for a single thing

11) Do you have any writing goals for the next year?

I want to finish Forgotten Promises, and the third story in the series. I have the vague plot for that one, and know what's going in the epilogue to end the series but I just need to get there.

Oh! and see 100 ways to say I love you to the end.

This was fun! I tag @theanxiouscupcake @an-elysian-tree @quarantined-fics and anyone else who wants to have a go!

#will i ever shut up about phantoms in the dark?#no. the answer is no.#lol but honestly this was fun i didn't even realise how many fics i wrote last year #my posts #ask game #writing #fanfiction #miraculous ladybug #atla #marichat #adrinette #ladynoir #2020 year in review

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sofijaeger · 4 years ago

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why dont you like mikasa?? genuine question

mmm

this caught my eye quick lmao... u can call me petty, or anything you’d like if you don’t agree, i’m dead serious. i’m used to it for having my own opinions on her by now.

here’s me and my sensitive ass self:)

also i didn’t proof read this, so i might ramble

i think from the start i’ve never really liked mikasa’s character.

At first i was bothered because she was a side character i didn’t really find any connection or comparison to (that’s usually how i can differentiate who will become my favorite in animes) she just seemed boring. i think after i realized eren was my favorite character too, i began disliking her more for the way she treated him despite his askings and how she minded no ones business but her own and his in hopes of persuing the happiness it gave her. Don’t get me wrong, in a world like theirs it’s natural to want to imagine anything except for that one, but i couldn’t understand why someone so serious and keen on making herself and only one other person happy was considered a favorite by everyone.

This is so incredibly bias but i just feel that with every chapter written she’s become increasingly selfish of achieving her desires. And i know people will argue with me saying her love for eren has always just been her main focus, and they are right. that’s literally it. She’s over protective of him, yes saving his life in the process but he barely does anything on his own without her. I don’t think “the boy who sought freedom” enjoyed that feeling and she certainly didn’t understand the extent of his motives. ON TOP OF THAT, and this pisses me the fuck off is that she never asked him how he was feeling.

NO ONE EVER DID.

so as someone who was claimed to be “closest to him” she never protected eren’s mentality, just his physical being in hopes it would change his mindset to that of what she wanted him to be. I almost feel bad for her because she wishes to accomplish nothing else in her life, and that includes saving her own comrades over one boy who saved hers. I mean to be honest, jean and others have saved her many times before as well, both physically and mentally, but because eren did it first that’s who she chose to obey for the rest of her life? i never found what she wanted besides being with the version she saw him (and literally stated in the manga) as.

On top of that, she’s been written to be completely flawless. At first I considered her obsession with him as a negative, but now she’s a strong woman who’s considered absolutely perfect to the characters and fandom. This was so frustrating to me, because it’s impossible for someone to be created and characterized like that in real life. so enviously, i searched and searched to find something wrong with her, someone who could agree with me and my opinions or possibly find something new, anything that would make her seem more humane than how people we’re making her out to be. What have i found? absolutely nothing. I don’t think i’ve met anyone who doesn’t like her like i do, so i’m left to sit with this feeling that no one else has. the toxic fans just make it so much worse for me. they claim she’s “godlike, better than everyone” or write of her to be absolutely alluring with no problems or difficulties, the opposite of what i’ve always tried to disprove and it makes me so upset. when i try to explain that gut feeling that’s sort of just grown about her her and her characterization i get beaten down about it every single time.

the worst part of my dislike for her came when i realized i was, well um... actually in love with eren, because now that he’s somehow fallen in love with her she’s just become the biggest goal i’ve ever had to change my mind about in order to reach her “level”. how could i ever reach the epitome of perfection, especially that of a fictional character? it’s simple: i’ll never be able to. and when i understood she was written to be this standard i could never reach, that’s when i began to actually hate her. i’ve written more about that if you read my reaction to chapter 139 but for the majority these were the reasons i’ve had that didn’t involve my envy, because i am jealous of her, a lot. like i’ve cried over not being good enough for him like she is:( sorry to be extra but as i’ve said this before, i use eren as my validation😔

FURTHER POSSIBLY THEORIES:

and now with the “epilogue” out, it not only just focuses on mikasa, making everyone seem irrelevant, but she still hasn’t listened to what eren truly wanted, for her to move on. She continues to wear the scarf and she still visits the grave to see him which i think is very sweet, but it is so unnecessary to bring her husband, children and grandchildren to the grave of her first lover. to me that says:

• “here’s the life you wanted eren, i’m living it without you”

• and “look” to her family “this is the boy i would have been much happier with but i tried to obey what he wanted”

in a way, she’s almost getting everything she wants yet i feel she still wants more? i’m not sure if i’m even making sense at this point:(

#negative sofia #sofi thoughts #sorry #sofitime

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junicai · 3 years ago

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- get to know me tag game !!

tagged by: @ggukkiedae <3 thank u lovie !

tagging: @h0neyjaehyun @nct-nari @nct-lian @cotccotc @seek-peace @bigbrainenergytingz and anyone else who'd like to participate 🤍

favourite colour? yellow 💛

lucky number? 13 ! (yes i know it's a contradiction shush)

do you have any pets? i have a dog! her name is lily

how tall are you? 165cm 😭 i used to think i was tall but apparently i'm still short

how many pairs of shoes do you own? uh, maybe 5 or 6? most of them are just runners, a pair of heels/boots and then i'm not counting the dance shoes fjsj

favourite song? it changes all the time, but currently it's the belll by olllam !

favourite movie? hm, probably atlantis? i don't really watch a whole lot of movies, so atlantis is just the one i watched most as a child lmao

who would be your ideal partner? someone who will sit with me and listen as i tell them everything i've learnt from my last 4 hour wikipedia deep dive

do you want children? no.

have you gotten in trouble with the law? nearly sjdj i was at a party on a spanish exchange and someone called the police on us 💀

bath or shower? shower for actual cleaning, bath for when ur going through shit and need to Process

what colour socks are you wearing? black !

favourite type of music? hm, r&b city pop kinda? i also listen to a lot of trad fusion though it lowkey slaps 😭

how many pillows do you sleep with? two

what position do you sleep in? i like, curl around a pillow?? if that makes sense

what don't you like when you're sleeping? being too warm :/ i'd much rather be cold lmao

what do you have for breakfast? i very rarely eat breakfast sjfjd i'm either running late or never hungry enough so i just - skip it

have you ever tried archery? yes !! i wasn't terrible at it which is crazy but i haven't tried it since then

favourite fruit? mango 🥭

favourite swear word? any variation of "ah feck" or "ah shite" bc it's normally followed by something extraordinarily comical

are you a good liar? am i? you tell me lmao

your favourite type of girl? my best friend is one of those, very excitable adorable girls i love her very dearly she's so LOVELY

what's your personality type? enfj ! i'm not super extroverted though, i'm more ambivert than anything else

left handed or right handed? left ✨ i'm called a cithóg where i'm from sjfjd

favourite food? too many to attempt to mention 😭

favourite foreign food? i had a croissant, in a french patisserie when i was in paris. it was like, 8 in the morning, i had coffee w it, and it was magical. i still dream of it sometimes

am i clean or messy? i clean when i'm anxious, so i'm p clean yeah :')

most used phrase? uhh probably "ah bless", which kinda means "ah bless their heart" or "ah cute" or smth in the middle? it's a bit difficult to explain sjd

how long does it take you to get ready? 5 minutes to 2+ hours depending on what it's for

do you talk to yourself? yeah 😭

do you sing to yourself? yeah i find it v fun to just sing along to smth in the background when ur alone

are you a good singer? ive trained for a couple years so i'd like to say so!

biggest fear? heights, or disappointing everyone i know

are you a gossip? no, but i do like to keep myself in the know of what's happening. i just don't spread it around

do you like long or short hair? short! i cut my hair into a lil curly bob about two years ago, and i don’t think i’ll ever go back to long hair - short hair on my face just looks so much cuter haha

favourite school subject? music/chemistry/spanish

extrovert or introvert? i’d say somewhere in the middle? ambivert maybe?

what makes you nervous? big crowds

who was your first real crush? my best friend 🤧 rip, we both had a thing for each other but we never would have worked out well so we just stayed as friends

how many piercings? two

how fast can you run? i can sprint pretty fast? but i really don’t like running 😭 so i wouldn’t know exactly how fast

what colour is your hair? black !

what makes you angry? people demanding respect and not giving it in return. (cough, every single teacher i’ve ever had cough)

do you like your name? yes ! i think it suits me :)

do you want a boy or a girl as a child? neither.

what are your strengths? i’m dedicated. if there’s something i want to do, i’m not stopping until i can do it, and i can do it well.

what are your weaknesses? i’m very singularly focused, which sometimes leads me to ignore other problems until they overflow. it’s something im working on lmao

what is the colour of your bedspread? currently, blue !

what is the colour of your room? yellow and white 💛

#*cassia.tagged #*carnation <3 #*bubs <3

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marveloussupernerd · 4 years ago

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OKAY. The only reason I’m sending this into you is because you seem to also be a fan of Taylor’s music. I hope you don’t mind! :)

This isn’t really a request, more like 2 random HCs I had while listening to Evermore. I’m not asking you to writing anything if you don’t want to. I just thought they were interesting!

Senario 1: what if in the RFA-universe MC was their version of Taylor Swift.

(Meaning her music was known world-wide, she had a massive fan base, she was known for writing stories about her personal life experiences and any album she released would go #1 immediately). Imagine one day she is sitting at the piano writing a song about a young women who turned down her engagement to the love of her life because she was suffering with mental issues (Champagne Problems). IMAGINE how sad the RFA+V+Searan would be when they think she is writing this from personal experience.THEY WOULD BE SO SAD. LMAO.

Senario 2: this one is a little more angsty

Imagine Saeyoung has been working on a task Jumin gave him for the past month. Imagine MC writing Tolerate It while sitting alone on the roof or in their shared bedroom. Imagine her telling herself that it’s all in her head but her insecurities get the better of her. Imagine Searan not knowing how to help but trying his best. Now I’m just sad..... T-T

bOnuS: imagine their reaction to No Body, No Crime. They would be like: “Mc? Did you kill someone?????” Lmao.

Wow genius stuff right here ! Also YES I love Taylor Swift... I have since fearless but honestly I’ve only listened to the entirety of her newest 3 albums oops

This will be multiple parts, also headcannon style? Imma play around w that tell me if you hate it tho

I showed this to my sister (who hasn’t listened to Taylor since 1989) and she goes you NEED to write this

MC is the in-universe Taylor Swift

Part 1: Sad Lyrics

A lot of these are them thinking the songs are about them

Zen (Champagne Problems):

He tries not to bother you while you’re writing

If you’ll let him sing with you to work on songs you’re planning on collaborating w guys on (think exile) he’s so there for you

He loves singing and has always loved your songs

But, as an actor himself, he respects the process and the alone time you need when you’re working on something new !

However

When he hears you singing Champagne Problems

Turning down a proposal because you just weren’t there mentally

Why is he... crying all of a sudden

I’ll tell you why bc if you don’t cry listening to the bridge of Champagne Problems you’re stronger than me

Waits until the piano stops

Then comes in

He has tears literally running down his face

“Zen! Are you okay?”

He plops down onto the bench next to you, pulling you into the biggest hug, which you, of course return

“We don’t have to get married. I’ll never pressure you like that. Are you okay? Do you need to talk about it?” He’s rambling

“It’s just a song Zen”

You have to rub his back to help him feel good enough to get through a sentence without crying

“I thought... I thought that really happened to you.”

Oh Zen, they’re not all based on your personal experiences

“It was so good though! It’s going to have everyone crying. Please tell me it’s on your next album.”

You have tears bc he’s so sweet !!

of course it’s on the next album

Yoosung (Coney Island):

Is dead silent when you’re writing

You literally don’t even notice he’s there

He gets jealous when you FaceTime other artists to work on a collaboration

They are literally so much better than him

And you’ve dated all these famous people

WHY are you with him !?

ANYWAYS

when he hears you playing Coney Island

He’s SOBBING

“Did I do something wrong!?”

“What? No? Of course not Yoosung”

Then why were you singing that

Not everything you write is what you’re experiencing right now

You had to explain to him that that song... you wrote it visualizing the pain you would feel if you lost him

Oh.

For real ??

And then he spirals into telling you how you’d be better off with one of your co-writers or whatever

But... you didn’t write the song thinking about your team

You wrote it thinking about him

It’s hard for him to understand

But when the album comes out... he listens to that song a lot

And still sobs like a baby every time

Jaehee (Exile):

Loves and respects your work

Not all your songs are her sort of thing

You make your newest albums a little more chill so she’ll enjoy them

You’d never tell her that though

You’re literally in a call with the guy you’re collaborating with working on exile

Singing about a failed relationship... for the second time

And experiences with bad relationships in general

It makes her worry that she messed up

Is this about the fight you two had a few months ago!? Did she make the same mistake? Are you thinking of leaving her

Waits until the call is over

“The song sounds beautiful.” Is all she can say

But you know her

“It’s not about you Jaehee”

“I love you like crazy the song isn’t about you”

Needs lots of affirmation bc that SCARED Her

The song is so good but she can’t listen to it more than like once or twice

She’s embarrassed that she thought it was about her

Little does she know you did write some songs about her... but only the happy ones

Jumin (Tolerate It):

He’s been busy with work

Buys a radio station that only plays your music though so he can listen to you all the time

Falls asleep to your singing voice bc it’s so comforting

You’re the media’s favorite couple

They’ve been speculating the two of you have been dating for a few albums now

Paper rings kinda gave it away huh

You thought he was working

Worked through writing a song about love that isn’t well-reciprocated

Honestly... you’re crying while writing it

It’s about an ex !! But also some lines make you miss getting to spend time with Jumin

He just stands there in the doorway

He doesn’t interrupt. Waits until your done

Heart breaks to see you crying

He’s shed a tear or two

Kneels down next to the bench

“I’m so sorry” is all he can say

“No!” Another tear down your face. “It’s not about you!”

He’s gently wiping away your tears

“I haven’t been here enough for you.”

“I’m okay. It’s okay. It’s not about you.”

“But it’s a wake up call. I’m building a home office so I can spend more time with you.”

Not a bad idea.

707 (Marjorie):

IF YOU DONT CRY EVERY TIME YOU HEAR THIS SONG

Again you are braver than me

Anyways Saeyoung can’t get it through his head WHY you like him / started dating him

Your relationship is completely off the radar thanks to him

Which means you DON’T write songs about him much because you don’t want speculation

You wrote this one after you read a sad fan fiction

Sobbing

I literally can’t sing during the bridge of this song I CRY

He listens to you. As you sob through the song. About how the person’s beloved died but they can still hear her and feel her in themselves

He sniffles

Interrupts you partway through

“Baby? Are you okay?”

You sniff and nod

“Is your mom okay? Your aunt? Your friend? Did someone die? Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m alright.”

But... you’re crying so much how are you okay

“I’m going to need to work on singing this without being emotional” you joke, wiping your tears

“Wait... it’s not my fault right? I didn’t die or anything.”

“Huh!? No. This is about a fanfic”

He laughs, pushes you lightly

“YOU HAD ME WORRIED!”

V (Illicit Affairs):

He sits with you during your songwriting process

Sometimes will even suggest lyrics to you if he’s feeling bold

He’s shocked with how quickly Illicit Affairs comes to you

Singing about breaking off an affair that has torn you apart and feels one-sided and

Uh... are you okay? You never mentioned something like this before

“My Love,” he stops you, “did this happen to you? Did somebody do this to you?”

“Oh. No I’m okay.”

You’re smiling

He was so worried

“And this isn’t about us right?”

Of course not. Everyone knows the two of you are together

“Of course not.”

He smiled. “I was worried about you.”

You giggle, kissing his cheek

“You showed me colors I can’t see with anyone else,” he recommends. “Or something like it.”

“V? Are you okay?” How the tables have turned.

“That’s how I feel about you. All love though. No angst.”

Saeran (This Is Me Trying):

This one is actually about him

You try to only work on your songs when he’s working or when he’s out

You try to spend as much time with him as possible to help with his coping process of everything that’s happened to him

But it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.

He wakes up in the middle of the night with a nightmare

Hears you singing in the other room. He knew you did this at night, it’s okay with him but... he really could use your help right now

Pads over to the door, standing outside until he can gather the courage to interrupt you

He feels pitiful

And then he hears you singing about how you’re struggling with your relationship and everything going on but you’re trying your best

He just sits outside the door. He can’t confront you right now. You’re feeling this way because of him. Maybe he deserves the nightmares

Luckily you’re planning on going to bed and see him when you try to leave the room, curled up on the floor.

“Did you have a bad dream?” You ask, joining him on the floor, pulling him close to you

All he can do is timidly nod

“Come in next time. Nothing is more important than you. I promise you that.”

He shakes his head. “I’m making things hard on you. With your job and your mental health and you trying to help someone so broken...”

His voice cracks. He wants to cry

“Saeran...”

There’s so much you could say.

This song is too sad

Later you’ll add a line about wanting him. Wanting to be with him despite all the trouble

But for now... you’ll be with him

Holding him.

Taking him to bed

Hugging him

Staying awake a little longer just in case he gets another bad dream

You were trying your best. The best thing you could do was be there by his side

He slept a little lighter. It was comforting to know that even though it was hard for the both of you, you were doing it, and you loved him

#mystic messenger #mysme #Taylor swift

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ghostofvixx · 5 years ago

Text

So glad|KYS|

The soulmate thing doesn’t work easily, but for you it gets ten times hardes if both of you hide your birthmark.

Genre: fluff + bulleted au

words: 2.7k

warnings: swearing the title’s supposed to be so f*cking glad but we’ll talk about it some other time, uhm trying to decide if this is cool or absolute trash, cute at a certain point

Yeosang is usually a very confident person. We could say he has no complexes.

(yes, he doesn’t look like it, but he is)

Except for one: his birth mark

He just DOESN’T LIKE IT AT ALL, his friends -the ones that know about it- think it’s cute but he DOESN’T.

He has tried almost everything to remove it at this point

But nothing can remove it effectively on a daily basis

Not as effective as makeup at least.

And that’s how makeup has become indispensable for him since he was in high school: that’s how he hates his birthmark.

What he doesn’t know is that that’s the reason why he can’t find his soulmates.

he’s ready, he can feel it, he’s been ready for years now, but why the time doesn’t come?

.:Keep reading :.

“You just have to know new people, you barely meet new friends Yeosang! Once you do it BAAAM the time will come.” Yunho tells him, overreacting as always.

Yeosang laughs, but deep inside him, he knows he’s right, just he doesn’t know how or when to know new people.

Then he began going to parties with the rest of ateez more frequently and actually getting to know ppl

classmates

ppl from other years

ppl from his uni and from other unis

but nothing happened

then he met you.

At first, it was just as usual: just some random person he had to be paired up with for a project.

Nothing new: he’s made a lot of friends like that,

but with you it was different,

he just felt SO comfortable with you.

He blamed it on your personality and your will to do the project right, and how attractive you were too

and you blamed it on the same thing

So none of you dummies realized just how comfortable and heart eyes emoji you were with each other

nor how both of your -covered- birthmarks were actually shining behind all the concealer.

Now let’s talk a bit about you.

Your birthmark is LITERALLY on your left thumb.

Why on your left thumb? Well, that will remain a mystery

Until you meet your soulmate at least

You don’t have that much of a complex but still, you don’t like it

So, knowing it’s the only thing that can tie you with your soulmate, you decided to not cover it for a while

Then you got tired of it and decided to put concealer on it.

It’s not that you wanted it, but you were lowkey mad at the world itself

because your soulmate was NOWHERE TO BE FOUND

Usually when you have a mark is because your soulmate is getting closer right? Or because you might meet them anytime SOON right?

Well not for you.

For you it was like it had to shine or something like that -words literally said by your friend, who liked all the soulmate stuff and had done researches on every type of soulmate in the world-.

So oh well here you are

you had eventually given up

maybe you’ll end up like those that won’t find their soulmates

but it was supposed to happen, right? You should have crossed paths with then at least ONCE for that to happen

But you didn’t

That’s what keeps you going, secretly you have some hope

Then you met Yeosang and you suspected

Because you had that THING like you NEEDED to boop his nose

Even if he wasn’t your soulmate you NEEDED to have something with him

Welcome to what we call: having a crush

crush culture is hard, maybe because you thought he wasn’t the one for you, after all, he isn’t your soulmate, right? AND ALSO because he was ALWAYS with his various friends

It’s like he barely had time for you

pretty understandable, taking into consideration that you guys weren’t the closest, but still he has told you so many times that you feel special

WHERE’S THE SPECIAL NOW KANG YEOSANG?

You barely see him outside class, you barely talk on the phone outside class

BUT YOU’RE STILL SPECIAL? WHAT?

The only time you see him is when he’s partying with his friends,,, and you don’t want to approach him

so you go unnoticed for the night

sometimes he’s noticed, some other he hasn’t

besides, you don’t like it when you’re with him in that mood, because everything becomes awkward.

“Y/n, do you want something to drink?” He would always ask you

you say no bc c’mon there are already a LOT of drunk people around

sometimes his friends,,, which is,, awkward

because sometimes they would ship you and uh that’s a nono on the outsides but a yes yes in the inside, right?

“Are you having fun?”

“I am.”

AND THAT’S ALL PALS

Not a single “would you like to dance?”

nor a singing along to the song together

NOTHING

T H A T ‘S I T

His friends don’t say it, but they look at both of you as if they were saying “why are y’all as awkward lol aren’t you friends?”

and that type of thought haunt you sometimes at nigh

BUT THEN WE HAVE TO MENTION A SPECIAL PARTY

apparently that night his group of friends got mixed with another one

and he wasn’t feeling himself

he told you that morning that today he didn’t feel like partying, he was in a bad mood

“why?” You asked.

“Just… Some random soulmate thoughts.”

Every time he talked to you about his soulmate, your heart skipped a beat

“Have you found them” you voiced your biggest fear.

“I haven’t, that’s the problem.”

He then explained to you that he couldn’t find them and that made him sad,,, especially today,,,, for no special reason

“O-kay?” You said. “Well, just try to enjoy yourself for once! You’re still young, you’ll find them soon! We’ll see each other probably, by the way.”

His heart jumped in his chest,,, how can you be,,,, as perfect for him? He just feels like it.

Like you were made for him

but then not really.

Back to the point

you were RIGHT about to approach him,,, then you saw who he was talking

that person wasn’t from his group of friends,,, nor a person you knew

and they were talking so,,, close,,, so so close

you don’t mean to do it, but you’re sure you’re pouting because you can sense some chemistry from them???

Or is it just you?

It was one-sided, but those types of things are hard to see when your crush is being flirted at.

Then some boy named San sat between them and that caught Yeosang’s attention completely

actually everyone’s attention too

even you, who barely know him, know it’s a part of the “San effect”, he’s the nicest boy ever

overall when he whispered something into Yeosang’s ear and suddenly Yeosang began to look for someone in the crowd

until his eyes met yours

and his smile lighted up

and omg he’s just so cute god pls help me

you know when he just looks so tiny when he smiles bc he’s excited abt something?

THAT’S THE WAY HE LOOKED AT YOU

T I N Y

and you k n e w you had been admiring him for too long without smiling back or smth because suddenly he frowned

and then you panicked

you’re not subtle at all lmao

for some reason, you seem like an open book to him

so, after panicking, you just leaft asap

not knowing he was actually going to r u n after you

why? He doesn’t know, he just adores you and can sense something’s wrong

so yeah he said goodbye hurriedly and ran after you and stuff and finally found you outside the house where the party was being held, walking back home.

“Are you leaving?”

you were astonished and flustered to listen to his voice

“I am.”

“Why? It’s soon, isn’t it?”

“I’m suddenly tired.” You said and turned back.

“Suddenly? I mean-”

“Yeosang, you’ve drunk, I’m sure, why don’t we talk tomorrow?” You didn’t mean to sound rude, but back then all you neededd was: a bed

to sleep!!1!111!!1!

not to cry11!!!1!1!!

“I haven’t drunk that much.” It was the truth, he’s not the best drinker, but he’s not a bad one.

“Well, we’ll talk when you are 100% sober, okay? Besides, you seemed pretty entertained-” You stopped all of the sudden

now he knows you’re jealous!!!!!!! ah these kids nowadays

however, you were cool bc if he remembered that the following day, you couln blame it on the alcohol

WHY DID YOU THINK HE WAS THAT DRUNK GOD HE’S A SAINT HE’S BARELY DRUNK YOU DUMMY

but well never mind, you just kept living in your little world

AND you had given the other dummy an idea

“But I don’t want to drink anymore~” he said in a singing voice that m e l t e d your heart. “I’m not wasted, but I know I’ve drunk and my friends seem pretty irresponsible right now.”

he just wanted to spend some time with you you know

“Oh,,,” what else can you say? Was he REALLY saying he’d rather be with you?

“Then what can I do for you?” You asked

“Let’s take a seat somewhere? Is it fine by you?”

“You’re the alcoholic one here my dude.”

“Shut up, I still can talk! You should speak to Yunho right now.”

“Not a nice influence, Yeosang.” You said jokingly. Actually, you know Yunho and he’s the nicest dude out there

another softie

but not in the same way as Yeosang.

“Still, you won’t remember tomorrow, right?” You asked him.

“I probably won’t.” He decided to play that game.

You ended up taking a seat on a bench inside a park,,, to talk about some stuff and all that

and it’s comfortable for a few seconds

until you realized the boy is literally sweating

and you probably are too bc it was so hot inside,,, and it’s not rlly cold on the outside

so you grabed some wipes from your bag

“Do you want one?” You asked the boy “They’re cold.”

“Why do you have them in your bag?”

“Oh come on, you have to be ready for parties, don’t you have them inside your bag?

“Uhm, not really,,, maybe I should.”

you felt a bit ridiculous, but then he actually takes one and smiles

“summer’s coming and this is cool, better be safe than sorry”

He always has that ability to make you feel right

“I’m actually going to remove my makeup.” He commented, laughing.

He was a bit scared, but you wouldn’t notice if he didn’t pass the wipe where his birthmark is, right? Besides, it was too dark to actually see it.

But when he’s in the process of removing it, you see that he’s not doing it right

I mean one side of his face was going to disappear if he kept rubbing while the other one remained intact

so you decided to do it yourself because WHY NOT and well

he panicked, you panicked, but continued being awkward as if nothing was wrong

THEN the time comes, he closed his eyes, focused on how intimate and nice this feels

and you passed the wipe right next to his left eye, where his birthmark is

while you were holding the wipe with your right hand, where your birthmark is

the moment feelt like a movie

because right when you had passed the wipe, his eyes opened and he held your wrist, and you looked at him shook

and was it you or are you a bit closer than before?

but THE thing is that you could see his birthmark because it’s shining with a very subtle light

and yours was too

but you made no comment because he was only just looking into your eyes and holding your wrist,,, he hadn’t made a single comment

has he even realized?

he wouldn’t tell you

but dude you had sEEN EVERYTHING YOUR CRUSH IS YOUR SOULMATE???

Apparently, he just didn’t care??? So you pretended you hadn’t noticed too??

and the night went on and he still maDE NO COMMENT

DDDDDD:

So ye he just accompanied you home and said goodbye with a smile

HAS HE REALLY NOT REALIZED?

Were you the only one that has felt their heart in their throat?

Is the soulmate thingy broken for you?

There’s literally no other way to explain it

and you couldn’t sleep because all you could think about was the fact that he wuldn’t remember

he had told you

and when you see him on Monday you go ignoring him hours because hoW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO TALK TO HIM?

Are you really his soulmate?

“y/n”

DAMN IT, HIS VOICE ONCE AGAIN

“y-yes?”

“I remember you know?”

oh,,, THEN WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

“Y-you do?”

“I’m sorry for reacting that way.” SO HE KNOWS? “Next time I won’t pretend I’ve drunk, I could notice you were awkward.”

nvm apparently he doesn’t

Eventually you changed your mind tho

Like homeboi be dropping hints about finding a soulmate but he yeeted your feeling through the window

That must be because he knows right?

BUT WHY DOESN’T HE DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT????

Suspicious

It was starting to get you on your nerves

He would ALWAYS vent to you about finding a soulmate, about being ready, about feeling it close

HOW CAN HE NOT KNOW GOD YOU WERE SO ANGRY

He always felt like you wouldn’t want to talk about the soulmate thingy, and he wouldn’t usually talk about that subject, knowing it bothered you

He thought that it was because you were frustrated bc nobody would come through

Dummy

Both of you dummies

One day it all just??? Exploded???

You had an awfully taught day at college, and when you talked to him about it you couldn’t even bring out the subject

“Sh, y/n listen, I’ve been thinking about it and I have a theory,,, do you think she’s my soulmate?” And he pointed discreetly to one girl standing on the other side of the road

“w-why would you think that?” Can you hear a crash? Yep, that was your heart.

“I don’t know, she’s with me in my math class and we get along well, I’ve known her for a few years now and-”

“Do you not like me?”

Yeosang was astonished.

“what?”

What what? Why does he looks so confused?

It made you feel so angry

“Look I understand if you don’t like me as your soulmate and you only see me as a friend and all that, just don’t rub it in front of my face, I feel awful every time because I like you so much Yeosang, you don’t even know-”

“what? Soulmate? What are you talking about?”

You don’t feel like a clown, you feel like the entire circus.

“Didn’t you know??? That we’re soulmate?”

“I- YOU- WHAT? MEN NONONONO ABSOLUTELY NOT WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT”

It’s always fun listening to Yeosang getting confused, annoyed, and surprised in tiny font.

Some curious people were looking at you so you decided to take a seat at a park so that you can explain the situation through.

It was just both of you, face to face, like that night.

“I discovered it the last time we went to a party, remember? We went to a park like this…”

And instead of just explaining, you repeated the action, your left thumb lightly caressed his birth mark covered with make up.

“My birth mark is how I can find my soulmate?”

“Yep.” You nodded. “Mine is too, though it is not as visible.”

“That moment was meant to happen, didn’t it?” He half-smiled so fondly you were about to faint.

“So, about liking me and stuff…”

God you were so shy

And he was too

But he moved his head forward and looked at you straight in the eyes

“ I can’t imagine anyone better for me, I’m so fucking glad it’s you.”

Butterflies? You felt and entire zoo going up and down your body when his gaze fell to your lips

“So fucking glad.” He repeated, and kept starring at you, but not moving forward.

How can he not be so AWKWARD right now??? You literally went completely RED????

But you said fuck it I’ll do it myself

And joined your lips

And finally you felt it

Yes, so fucking glad.

#ateez #yeosang #kang yeosang #ateez imagines #ateez scenario #ateez au #ateez fluff #ateez yeosang #yeosang au #yeosang scenario #yeosang imagine #soulmate ateez #yeosang fluff #soulmate au

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musical-chick-13 · 4 years ago

Note

Melisandre too please

OKAY STRAP IN MY FRIEND BECAUSE I WANT TO SCREAM ABOUT GOT WOMEN TODAY

• Did they live up to their potential? / In what ways was their potential unachieved?

I’m going to stick to the show because, again finished when the books aren’t. So, I really love Melisandre with my whole heart. You know, you have this mysterious woman who easily manipulates a powerful man, but it’s not just a standard femme-fatale I love power kind of thing. She grew up enslaved (at least in book canon, I can’t remember if this was ever mentioned in the show), and she’s in, essentially, a codependent relationship with her religious faith. It’s not for some sort of fake demureness or quest for purity, it’s because she thinks it’s genuinely the only thing she can do to save the world. She’s not a corrupt pastor, she’s an extremist who truly thinks she’s doing the right thing. But she’s not quite a competely-brainwashed, naive young victim, either. Obviously being sold into slavery and trained in the priesthood since forever ago influences her beliefs. But she reflects deeply on the nature of morality and owns up readily to the fact that sometimes she engages in acts of violence in the name of what she believes. It’s not an accident, people’s lives simply come at the expense of her service to R’hllor and faith in the coming of Azor Azai. She balances a very fine line between two extremes of the religious zealot morality spectrum, and I think she does it very well. The one thing I will say is that the show couldn’t seem to make up its mind on whether or not she was a fraud or whether she actually had Special Magic Powers. And not in kind of a “We won’t show you all the details of what happened, judge for yourself if she’s legit” way. They had her whole conversation with Selyse about using potions for desired fire effects, but she gives birth to shadow assassin babies and then literally brought someone back from the dead. If you’re going to make it ambiguous, keep it ambiguous. If not, make a decision and commit to it. Being completely shrouded in mystery; being a complete, unapologetic fraud; and being a supernatural entity entrusted with magic who sometimes misuses it “For The Greater Good” are all much more interesting than flip-flopping back and forth on characterization because you’re afraid to commit to a concept. Also, for some reason, in season 7 her main objective was to bring Jon and Dany together? Why? They should have explained how she got to that point and why she thought it was necessary. Also her death, but I talk about that in the last point.

• How they negatively and positively affected the story.

Positive: She brought Stannis into the story, leading to a discussion about whether or not the concept of justice is born from conformity to rules or a desire to put more good into the world. We are introduced to another religion in Westeros that helps enrich the worldbuilding and leads to a moral compass that is centered so differently from the other characters that it provides a fresh way of interpreting the story’s events and keeps us engaged. We are introduced to Davos aka Onion Dad through her and I love that guy.

Negative: She brought Stannis and Davos into the story, to the point where show Shireen died FOR NO REASON which COMPLETELY RUINED STANNIS’S CHARACTER IN THE PROCESS. Stannis wasn’t supposed to be The Irredeemable Bad Guy, he was supposed to be another link in the chain that encompassed all of the different ways of looking at morality. Instead, they used his multifaceted, complex relationship with Melisandre to flatten out his characterization, make him the resident Pathetic Game Player We Are Supposed to Laugh At, and ultimately left off all degree of nuance by making him burn a child alive for shock value. I’ll never forgive the show for that. (Also, what with Brienne’s smiting of Stannis, Davos being the All-Around Good Guy and the fact that Mel’s death was so...anticlimactic...we’re also apparently supposed to see Stannis as the one primarily responsible for Renly’s death? Just? Ignoring Mel’s (and Davos’s) part in that? Sounds fake and narratively inconsistent, but okay.)

• What my favorite arc for them is.

-I think, probably after Stannis’s death (how said death came about notwithstanding, see above), when she realizes that she was...wrong? About her faith? She thought she knew how the world was supposed to work, like she had finally figured it out and unlocked some big secret, and then it just wasn’t true at all. And (kind of similar to what I said about Cersei) she has to rebuild herself. She and Davos have reversed their ways of thinking, where Davos believes-maybe not in R’hllor or any god(s), but in the existence of inexplicable and superhuman things-and now he has to convince her. And only then does she (and the audience) learn of her true power. (Which, as I mentioned above, I’m not entirely sure how I feel about this. Her being a charlatan strikes me as a character choice I would want more in a story I was writing, but I’m not writing these books/episodes, lmao.) Her priorities become more skewed toward “Fighting the White Walkers and making sure whoever Azor Azai is has a world left to save,” which WE LOVE ORGANIC SHIFTS IN PERSONAL MOTIVATION WE REALLY DO Y’ALL

• What I think of their ending.

-Ugh. I don’t think I’ve ever actually talked about this, but her just going, “Well, my goal is done, bye” and then going out into the snow and just laying down to die is...how do I put it...utter bullshit. There was never any true payoff in her ongoing conflict with Davos, no resolution to her (weird, creepy) relationship with Jon or how he felt about her doing awful things but still being the person who brought him back to life, she didn’t even get a moment of dying in service of a cause she believed in (like, for example, Theon, whose ending I also hated but for much more personal reasons that have less to do with narrative structure and more to do with my feelings). She legit just said, “I’m out” and instantaneously died. Also...she, Davos, and Jon have been through a LOT. The fact that there was barely any mention of her or what her death meant save for that one conversation Davos had with Tyrion??? for some reason???? seems like a waste. If someone has been with you through multiple traumatic experiences, it doesn’t matter if you hate them, you’ll have some sort of feelings after they die. Davos never got retribution for Shireen, doesn’t that bother him?? How does Jon feel knowing he owes his life to the killer of an innocent child? How does Davos feel seeing yet another person die right in front of him, but intentionally this time?? *sigh* Emotional through-lines are a thing, people!

• When I wish they had died. / If I think they should’ve died.

-Ultimately, my biggest beef is that there was...nothing I saw in the show that suggested this was how she wanted her story to end. If you’re going to make a character feel hopeless upon resolving a specific problem or tie their entire reason for existing to one conflict, you have to have them talk about it or personally reflect on it? You can’t just stick that on as an afterthought to justify...whatever it was D&D were trying to justify. Melisandre has always had such a complicated relationship with Westerosi morality, and she NEVER got to see any direct consequence of that (and by consequence I don’t even mean, like...punishment or something, I literally just mean a result that happened because of it). She, again, legit just walked in the snow by herself and insta-died. It 100% felt like they just didn’t know what to do with this character so they just scribbled something in so they wouldn’t have to spend any time on her later because they didn’t care about her. (Which, obviously, they’re wrong. I love her and she’s so interesting this is a fact. Shame on you, D&D.) I do think, for her, it makes sense based on her religious ties to kind of...have a last-minute swerve toward penance. Not guilt or redemption, per se, but a way to honor the world she’s trying to save by way of choosing to die through a selfless act. Whether that be sacrificing herself as a distraction for the White Walkers or putting herself in the line of fire (ice?) for Jon because she thinks he'll help heal the world or (my personal favorite) fighting off a White Walker to protect Davos because she has finally come to sort-of understand his nuanced take on morality and that although he has some bad/dark parts, he is genuinely a good man and deserves to make it out alive. Let him have the life that Shireen didn’t get to have. Davos would be SO CONFLICTED because She Did a Good Selfless Thing For Someone Who Wanted To Kill Her But She’s An Awful Person What Do I Think About Good And Evil Now and the introspection would be delicious.

#melisandre #got #asoiaf #meta #tw: suicide mention #davos seaworth #stannis baratheon

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narika-a · 6 years ago

Text

NCT Mafia Reaction: When their fiancee runs away

||| Requested by anon |||

Lee Taeyong

You froze the moment you felt the gun barrel against your head.

“You’re going to threaten me to come back?” you asked, without turning around. “That’s not very nice.”

“It was not very nice that you decided to run away in the first place,” he said, lowering the gun. “You know I would never hurt you.”

You didn’t reply to that, as you weren’t so sure lately, especially after you found out about his work.

“You don’t believe me?.. Well that doesn’t matter, you’re coming back with me anyway.”

There is too many members lmao, read the rest of the boys under the cut ⬇️

Moon Taeil

“I trusted you!” he shouted, slamming his fist on the table but you didn’t even flinch.

“Trusted?” you snickered. “How can you even talk to me about something as trust when you told me about your real work just a few weeks ago?”

“I was doing that-”

“Oh don’t start with that ‘I was trying to protect you’ bullshit with me,” you interrupted him.

He stood still for a few seconds, thinking of what to say to you. Your attempt to escape can not be tolerated.

“We’re not done yet,” he said, turning on his heels and leaving the room and you let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. He’s really scary when he’s angry.

Johnny/Seo Youngho

It was a quick and irrational idea. You didn’t have time to think anything through but you just knew you had to get out of here, the moment you heard the words leave his lips.

You got your suitcase and began shoving anything you could find into it. ‘Surely he won’t keep you captive here, will he? You can leave right?’ you thought but got caught red handed in the process.

“What are you doing?” he asked, coming into the room.

“I-I’m leaving!” you stated quickly and he just furrowed his eyebrows.

“The hell you are!” he shouted, slamming the door, so no one would interrupt your conversation. “If you want to run away, you’re going to have to try better than that,” he said, cornering you with his body.

Nakamoto Yuta

You followed his every move as he paced around the room, waiting for what he is going to say. It’s been a few hours since his men found you and until now you weren’t nervous to face him but he didn’t say a thing since he came into the room and the tension was killing you.

“Yuta I-”

He slammed his glass on the table, startling you.

“You what?” he asked, pushing the drink to you across the table. “You were scared?” he tilted his head to the side. “Why? Did I ever do something to you that would make you feel that way?”

“I... No,” you looked to the side, avoiding eye contact.

“Then what changed?”

You turned your gaze back to him.

“Everything. I can’t be with a man that does stuff like that for a living.”

“We will see about that...”

Qian Kun

He practically dragged you back to your room and pushed you inside as soon as he got you back.

“Kun, wait... Let’s talk about this,” you said, backing up until you hit the bed and not being able to keep your balance fell on top of it.

“Yeah baby, let’s do that,” he said, hovering over your body.

Your heart started beating faster and you hated how your body betrayed you.

“I don’t want to be here, Kun,” you said, not really believing it yourself. “You can’t force me to marry you.”

“Is that so?” he asked, taking your chin between his fingers. “But I’m not forcing it. We both know you want it.”

You blushed, shaking his hand away from your face. Fuck him honestly. He laughed and stood from the bed.

“Stay here and think about what you done,” he said, leaving you alone in the room.

Doyoung/Kim Dongyoung

He was suspiciously calm and that scared you.

“Sit down,” he said, pointing to the armchair in front of him. You reluctantly did what he asked.

“You owe me an explanation about your little antic.”

“I want to break up,” you quickly stated.

“I’m afraid that won’t be possible, dear,” he said, approaching you and your whole body tensed up. He brushed a strand of hair from your face and leaned in closer. “You’re mine baby. And I’m not letting you go that easily.”

Ten

“I’m going to be blunt baby,” he said, crossing his arms. “Are you cheating on me? Is that why you ran away?”

Your eyes widened. Is this really the conclusion he came to?

“Are you an idiot!” you shouted. “Were you ever going to tell me?”

“Tell you w- Wait...”

“Yes! That’s right! I found your work documents, you lying bastard!”

He started laughing and pulled you to him.

“So?” he smirked. “I don’t see how that is a problem. If you think you can leave just because of that, then you’re highly mistaken.”

Jaehyun/Jung Yoonoh

It took him way longer than he expected to find you and one day when you finally started feeling safe you met him just outside your new apartment.

“Hello Y/N,” he said, standing up straight from the railing. “How did you enjoy your break?”

You immediately looked around, thinking of ways to run away.

“Don’t even try. My men got this place surrounded,” he said, as he came up to you. “I missed you,” he said, caressing your cheek and you had to resist the urge to lean into his hand. “How did you manage to stay hidden for so long?”

“I learnt from the best,” you retorted, taking his hand away.

“Should have guessed...” he smirked, content with your answer. “We’re going home.”

WinWin/Dong Sicheng

"Y/N!” he called after you, just as you were about to get in the taxi. He waved the driver to go away, as he approached you.

“You! How dare you come after me!” you shouted, ready to slap him across the face but he caught your hand midway.

“Y/N, please. Not in public.”

“Let go of me, Sicheng,” you struggled in his grip but he only tightened it.

“I have no clue why you thought this was even a remotely good idea,” he said, pulling you to him by the same hand he was holding. “I guess I must teach you, that actions have consequences,” he whispered to your ear, making shivers go down your spine.

Kim Jungwoo

He poured himself a drink from your hotel room’s mini bar and leaned on the counter, facing you.

“I know what you’re thinking,” he said, taking a sip.

“How did he find me?” was the only thought in your head. You still couldn’t comprehend he just waltzed right into this room, as if you weren’t even missing for the past two days.

“Well...” he set his glass down. “There are a lot more things I haven’t told you... Including that this hotel belongs to be, baby...”

Your eyes widened. No way. It was one of the biggest hotel chains in the country.

“So yeah...” he smirked. “No matter where you go, I have eyes all over the place.”

Lucas/Wong Yukhei

You yelped as somebody caught you by the hand and pushed you against the wall in one of the alleyways.

“Had your fun?” he smirked, getting hold of your hands and lifting them up to your head. “I think it’s about time to go come back home.”

You struggled in his grip but there was not much you could do in this position.

“Ahh,” he leaned in so close you could practically feel his breath on your skin. “I always loved when you resisted, makes the reward so much more satisfying.”

“Fuck off Yukhei! We’re... we’re done!”

“Yeah right,” he laughed. “I don’t think so babe.”

Mark Lee

He tapped his fingers, expecting you to finally start talking. You managed to get pretty far, even left the city, only to be stopped in one of the train stations. Now you two were sitting in the empty waiting room of the said station in silence, the atmosphere so tense you could practically cut it with a knife.

“I changed my mind,” you were the first to start speaking. “I don’t want to get married anymore.”

“Changed your mind?” he chuckled, turning all of his attention to you. “I’m sorry but that’s not how this works.”

“Then enlighten me, Mark,” you said, leaning back in your seat. “What’s going to happen from now on? Because if you think-”

He suddenly interrupted you, sweeping you off your feet and throwing you over his shoulder.

“What are you doing?! Put me down!” you shouted.

“Nah,” he simply said, carrying you to the car parked outside

Xiaojun/Xiao Dejun

He sat down in front of you, threw his arms on both sides of the sofa and stretched his head. You could tell he was tired.

You were gone for no more than a few days and he was probably looking for you the whole time. He sighed and focused his gaze on you.

“Why?” he asked but you didn’t answer.

“Don’t feel like talking?” he questioned again, resting his chin on his hand. “I guess that’s no problem, as long as you’re back...”

He stared at you for a few more seconds and stood up.

“Come find me when you do...”

Hendery/Wong Kunhang

He listened as the person from the other side of the line explained the situation before hanging up. He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He pressed the button, calling his men to the room.

“She did it,” he said and everyone understood what he meant. He has voiced his concerns about you trying to escape weeks before this. “I want you to find her. Bring her back. Tonight. I don’t want to hear no excuses,” he ordered before dismissing them.

He stood up from his chair and went to the window already thinking of place where you could be hiding.

“Such a bad decision,” he thought to himself as he went back to work.

Liu YangYang

He was a patient guy, you knew that better than anyone but now his patience was running thin and it was all because of you, as this was your third time you tried to run away this month.

“Just let me go,” you shrugged. “You will find someone else.”

“Are you hearing yourself right now? I don’t need anyone else! I love you!”

“Well I don’t!” you lied and he saw right through it.

“Y/N,” he said, approaching you. “You need to stop wasting both of our time with this nonsense because no matter how many times you run away, you know you will end up back here, right by my side.”

You scoffed, yet you knew he was telling the truth...

Huang Renjun

He followed you with his eyes as you moved around in the kitchen.

“Could you stop staring?! You think I’m that stupid to try and run away while you’re still home?”

“I don’t know, it’s not like you didn’t try before!”

You just rolled your eyes and continued whatever you were doing. He stood there for a few more seconds and then eventually left.

And that was all that you needed. You looked around and sneaked out of the apartment while he was still in the bathroom.

“Hey Y/N!” he said, walking back in. “Goddammit!” he slammed his fist on one of the counters, when he saw you were missing. AGAIN. “I swear to god, it’s starting to become some kind of game to her,” he thought as he dialed your guards number.

Lee Jeno

You thought you counted the time right but you didn’t take into account the fact that he could always come back home early.

“Going somewhere?” he asked, slamming the closet door right in front of your face. “Without me?”

“J-jeno! you stuttered, not expecting to see him at all today. “I was just...”

“Spare me the excuses, I know what you’re up to,” he said, grabbing your suitcase and throwing it to the side. “Unfortunately, I’m here to ruin your perfect plans.”

Haechan/Lee Donghyuck

"Hello Y/N,” you looked up at the guy who just sat down in front of you.

“Hyuck!” you almost spit out your drink. “What... How the heck?” you looked around, wondering how he managed to get into the restaurant without you noticing.

“If you’re thought you are good at hiding, then I have some bad news for you,” he chuckled.

He raised his hand, calling for the waitress.

“Since we’re here, we might as well have dinner before we come back. My treat.”

“How sweet,” you smiled sarcastically. Well, not much you can do now.

Na Jaemin

You were waiting for the train to pass when you saw him on the other side of the crossing. You immediately turned around to run away, hoping he didn’t notice you but were stopped by his men.

Once the crossing opened up he waved at you to come over, yet you were frozen solid in your place, so he went to you instead. He threw his hand around your shoulder and pulled you close, leading you away from his men. You would be lying if you said, you didn’t miss his warmth.

“Now,” he said, once you two were far enough. “Never do that again,” he smiled. “I can’t promise I will be as forgiving next time.”

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