#I don’t do fantasy football or football period

[imperatorrrrr]

alert! alert! Nate is the commissioner of the New Jersey Devils fantasy football league.

[lucy90712]

Home- Jude Bellingham

WC: 2.8k (this is a longer one)

For most home is the place they go back to every night where they feel safe but for me it is something that has evolved as I've gotten older. When I was young I always thought of home as the house I lived in with my parents but then I grew up slightly and we moved house a few times and I realised that the building I was in didn't matter it was being with my parents so they became my sense of security. Now everything has changed again as I have well and truly moved away from home and to another country and where I feel safe is with my best friend he's the one that provides me with that feeling of being home and being secure.

I met Jude when I was about 5 as my family moved down the same road as his and we have been friends ever since. As kids we always used to play with each other whenever we saw each other at the park or when our parents spent time together. Naturally there was a period of time where we drifted apart and didn't really talk at all as we found other friends but in our later teen years we became so much closer again as he was there to support me through a tough time in my life. When Jude moved away to go and play football I was so incredibly proud of him but I missed him so much when he was away but we talked pretty much every day and whenever he came back home we spent loads of time together.

After spending a year and a bit separated from each other it was time for me to to go university and although I had offers from unis across the country I also applied to a few in other countries that had a good course for that I want to do and I happened to get an offer with a full scholarship to somewhere in Germany. It was like it was meant to be as the uni was in the city that Jude lives in as well so I accepted the place right away. When I moved out there I stayed with Jude for a few days until I was able to move into my apartment and from those few days onwards we have been truly inseparable. We have seen each other nearly everyday since with the exception of days when Jude had to travel to other countries for games which meant spending a lot of time together but we both loved that as we are the definition of best friends.

Recently my friends have been trying to convince me that Jude and I would be a great couple but I always tell them we are just great friends and nothing more but that doesn't stop them talking about it when they think I can't hear. They are always pointing out how much time we spend together and how we supposedly look at each other, I've even heard them call the two of us endgame despite me having a boyfriend. It's not just my friends either I've heard Jude's teammates saying that the two of us would be the perfect couple and making bets on when we will get together, not if when. Whenever anyone talks about Jude and I being a good couple I always shut it down immediately because I don't like to think about it as whenever I do I end up in a dream world where we aren't just friends.

Truthfully I have had feelings for Jude for a few years now it I fight to keep them away because I just can't lose him. There are many nights that I lay awake fantasying about what life would be like if Jude and I were dating but then I remember just how important he is to me and I know I can never say anything. Jude is everything to me he's the one I go to when I'm feeling down and he's the one I celebrate with first when something exciting happens without him I'd be a mess and seemingly all alone. There is no way I could risk telling him and having that ruin our friendship which is why I'm choosing to try and get over my feelings without anyone ever knowing. This is exactly why when I met a nice guy who treated me well I ended up dating him as I needed someone else to focus my attention on and for the most part it works pretty well. There are occasions when I think about Jude but for the most part I'm really happy with my boyfriend and I feel like slowly I can move on from Jude and live my own life happily.

My boyfriend and I have been together for about 8 months now which is the longest relationship I've ever been in. Recently it's felt like we are getting a bit more serious too which scared me at first but I've now come to terms with the fact that at some point this was going to happen and I need to let myself let go of my feelings for Jude. As we are now completely comfortable with each other I gave my boyfriend a key to my apartment so that when I have late classes he can let himself in so we can spend time together when I get home which since has become a bit of a routine. Today is one of those days where I was supposed to have a late class but we were able to finish an hour earlier as we had nothing else left to cover. As I was early I decided to get some dinner on my way home for the two of us to eat as I thought that would be a nice surprise along with me finishing earlier.

When I finally got to my apartment the door was unlocked which meant someone was already there as I definitely locked the door this morning. As I went inside it was completely quiet and none of the lights were on despite it starting to get dark outside which made me question if I did actually lock the door. Out of fear I grabbed my phone so I could call the police if necessary but as I did I noticed a text from my boyfriend telling me he was at my apartment which somehow made my anxiety worse. I quickly walked around the living room and kitchen before going to look behind all of the closed doors. First was my office but that was empty then came the bathroom but I didn't need to open that door as when I stood outside I could hear moaning coming from further down the hallway which meant it was coming from my bedroom. I didn't want to assume the worst but I couldn't help it so out of pure rage I stomped down the hallway and flung to door open to reveal possibly the worst sight I've even seen. My boyfriend in my bed with another girl.

I'm not sure what came over me but I yelled at both of them kicking them out of my apartment and ending things with my so called boyfriend straight away. I made sure to get my key back too as quite frankly I never want to see that man again. Once they were gone realisation hit me like a ton of bricks and nothing could be done to stop the tears flooding down my face as I questioned how long this had been going on for and how stupid had I been to not notice something was up. So many thoughts were swirling around my mind as I took the sheets off my bed and threw them in the wash as if I ever want to be able to sleep in that bed again I at least need to wash the sheets but honestly that didn't help. Being in my apartment just made me feel worse as I looked at every counter in the kitchen and bathroom and the sofa wondering if they had been tainted too. It was all too much and I needed to get out of there for a bit and the only place I wanted to go is to Jude's as he always knows what to do.

Despite having tears in my eyes I managed to drive to Jude's as I know the route like the back of my hand by now. When I got to the door I rang the doorbell and then just walked in as at this time Jude would know it could only be me. As I took my shoes off and tried to wipe the tears from my face I heard footsteps getting closer until I heard him say hello which instantly brought be comfort as I know he will be here for me for as long as I need to rant about what just happened. When I looked up at him he saw my face which I imagine is puffy and red with streaks of mascara down it and without saying a word he pulled me into a tight hug where I could let my emotions go. Just like every other time Jude has comforted me when I'm upset he picked me up and walked to the sofa where he sat me in his lap and gently rubbed my back to help calm me down.

"Whenever you're ready you can tell me what's wrong" he said

"He cheated on me" I said

"What?" He questioned

"I finished early and when I got home I couldn't find him even though he said he was there and then I heard moaning coming from my bedroom and there he was fucking some random girl in my bed" I ranted

"What an asshole you deserve so much better than someone who would even think of doing that" he said

"How about you stay here tonight and tomorrow we can go together to get you a new bed as you don't want to be sleeping in your current one" he said

"That sounds good but you don't have to come with me" I said

"Well I'm coming whether you like it or not" he laughed trying to lighten the mood

"Thank you Jude I really appreciate you being here for me" I said

"Of course I'll always be here for you" he said

He wiped the tears off my face before moving me off his lap and running off to the bathroom and he came back with makeup remover which he used to take all of my makeup off. He gently rubbed my face to get all of my makeup off with the cutest concentration face as he had his tongue sticking out slightly and his eyebrows furrowed as he made sure to get all of the makeup off. Once he was done he went off again but this time when he came back he had food with him as he had guessed I hadn't eaten which was true as I'd left my food on the counter at home. We turned on our favourite show which we have watched a million times but I could watch it a million more as it always cheers me up especially when I actually get to watch it with Jude.

For the next few hours Jude was just being so sweet he ordered ice cream for the both of us even though he's not supposed to eat it as he knows I like to drown my sorrows in ice cream. He also made sure I was comfortable and cozy under a blanket as he held me close to him for extra comfort. It was just like the old times before I got together with my boyfriend as we often used to have late nights together spent like this and honestly I've really missed them I've missed having Jude so close to me. As we watched the tv Jude innocently moved his arm from being around my shoulder to around my waist which I didn't mind but it sent my head spinning. For the first time in a few months I felt all my feelings for Jude come flooding back the the forefront of my mind. I'd been doing really well at burying them and moving on but after everything that happened tonight having Jude put his arm around my waist sent me spiralling again.

This whole situation is so overwhelming as I don't think at this point I'll ever truly get over my feelings for Jude but I don't feel like I can tell him. Jude means so much to me that if I told him and he didn't feel the same way I would be a mess and not just because he rejected me but because I'd have lost my best friend. There is also a problem as even if he did feel the same and we ended up dating if things didn't work out I'd still lose him. It's all just so much to think about and even though I've thought about it a million times I have still never come up with a resolution that makes me truly happy. There are times I think about just taking the leap of faith and telling him how I feel but I always talk myself out of it before I can get the words out. For me it's a big decision whether or not I want to possibly ruin a lifelong friendship over some stupid feelings or not which is why I'm often thinking about it.

"What are you thinking about?" Jude asked which brought me out of my spiral

"Oh nothing" I replied

"Come on just tell me you know you can tell me anything" he said

"Not this" I whispered under my breath

"Why can't you tell me this what secrets are you keeping from me?" He asked jokingly

In that split second I had a decision to make I either tell him how I feel and hope for the best or come up with another lie which I have to keep up with. At this point I have so many lies or stories I've told when I've chickened out of telling Jude how I feel that I've had to write them down so I can refer back to them when necessary. I feel like I need to stop being so afraid and just go for it, take a risk and that's exactly what I'm going to do.

"I have feelings for you" I blurted out

"What" he questioned

"I have feelings for you Jude and I have for years and I just can't live without telling you anymore" I said

"I know it's a lot to spring on you and I get if you don't want to be friends anymore I just couldn't keep my feelings hidden any longer" I rambled

"I have feelings for you too" Jude interrupted me

"Wait you do" I said

"Yeah I mean how could I not you're so beautiful and such a kind person I just never thought you would feel the same so I never said anything" he explained

I didn't really know how to respond as I honestly didn't think he'd feel to same so it took me by surprise. Knowing Jude felt the same way gave me a boost in confidence so instead of saying anything I just leant in and kissed him. Despite being friends for years and playing many games of truth or dare Jude and I have never kissed before so this was completely new for us both. It took Jude a second to realise what was happening but when he did he kissed me right back and even put a hand behind my neck to pull me in closer. The kiss was amazing it was even better than I imagined it would be which is truly something as I have thought about this moment a lot. It was as if time came to a stand still as we seemed to be kissing forever but when we finally pulled apart it had only been a few minutes.

We looked into each others eyes once we stopped kissing and Jude gently swept a piece of my hair behind my ear before then leaving his hand on my cheek. I could've stayed like that forever but sadly that can't happen as we both have lives to live and we also need to talk about what we are now as we can't stay just friends after that.

"What are we now?" I asked

"I'd love for you to be my girlfriend but I know you just broke up with your boyfriend so we can go slowly if that's what you want" Jude said

"I'd love to be your girlfriend but promise me that if things don't work out we can still try and be friends" I said

"Of course my love I couldn't bare not having you in my life in some way" he said

"So will you be my girlfriend?" He asked

"Of course I will" I replied

[siriuslysmoking]

No One Was Saved | Chapter 2

(The Year Everything Flipped Upside Down Masterlist)

—Eleanor Rigby Died in the church and was buried along with her name Nobody came Father McKenzie Wiping the dirt from his hands as he walks from the grave No one was saved— -The Beatles

Y/n was sitting in the lunchroom waiting for Chrissy to show up, she had made it known that she needed to tell Y/n something so here she waited, in the lunchroom. But no Chrissy. None of the cheer girls had seen her, so they were no help. Jason was her last resort. She didn’t necessarily like talking to him, but when she had to, she had to. She walked over to Jason’s table, it was all the basketball players.

“Hey! Jason!” she spoke as she got close to their table, he hummed as he looked up. 

“Oh, it’s you.” he looked disappointed.

“What, not the person you wanna see?” Y/n questioned.

“Not particularly.”

“Dido, now, do you happen to know where Chrissy is?” She questioned, crossing her arms across her chest.

“No, why would I know?”

“Because she’s your girlfriend.” she shrugged.

“No, sorry princess, I don’t know.”

Y/n rolled her eyes getting ready to walk away when a voice from across the room called out. “As long as you’re into band or science…” Eddie Munson. “Or parties.” standing on a table, once again making himself known. “Or a game where you toss balls into laundry baskets!”

Y/n’s eyebrows were raised as she watched the 20 year old man -who was still in highschool- with the long curly hair, his black jeans, his leather jacket with a jean vest above it, and of course who could forget his Hellfire t-shirt. Hellfire: a Dungeons and Dragons club, that Eddie was like the leader of, Y/n didn’t know much about the game except that it was a fantasy role-play game. To be honest she was quite intrigued by it, Y/n always thought about learning more about the game that others called a ‘satanic ritual’. That was all bullshit though and she knew it.

“You want something, freak.” Jason stood up, he was so defensive, so willing to stir the pot. Eddie’s response to Jason was to imitate a demon, his pointer fingers pointing up on his head, his tongue stuck out and he made growling demon-like sounds. Eddie smiled as Jason pulled a disgusted face, it wasn’t until Eddie locked eyes with Y/n (who was still standing next to Jason) she noticed the side of her lips were turning up. She immediately forced her face back into a neutral expression, but Eddie had already seen it. 

He turned around on the table, “it’s forced conforming. That’s what’s killing the kids.” he stepped off the table as he shouted, scaring a group of girls that were passing his table. He saw a pair of cheerleaders and motioned for them to walk past him. “That’s the real monster.” this time he spoke much lower.

When Y/n realized she was staring she turned and walked out of the lunch room, frustrated and concerned, where the hell is Chrissy? She continued her search, Y/n had a free period for next class and so did Chrissy so she continued to look for her blonde friend. Not twenty minutes later she walked outside because some people ate outside on the picnic benches, that’s when she saw Chrissy. 

“Hey, Chrissy!” she shouted as she ran over to her friend. “I was looking for you everywhere. I thought we agreed to meet in the lunchroom.”

“Oh-” Chrissy flinched as Y/n rested her hand on her shoulder. “Uh, yeah, I just got distracted.”

“Are you okay?” Y/n asked slowly, removing her hand from the girl's shoulder.

The blonde nodded, “Yeah I just want to talk to you.”

“Yeah, okay.” Y/n nodded as she walked with Chrissy towards the football field. “What’s going on?”

“I- uh-” she trailed off.

“You can tell me anything, you know that right?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Okay, then what’s going on?”

“I feel like I’m going crazy.” Chrissy rushed out.

“Don’t we all?”

“No like, I’ve been getting nightmares and headaches and bloody noses…” she trailed off. “I’ve been seeing things.”

“What kind of things?”

“You’re going to think I’m going insane.”

“I promise I won’t, to be honest, I’ve been getting headaches and bloody noses. I had a headache today. I could barely see.”

“Okay… today in the bathroom it was my mom, talking about a dress and then her feet, they-they were like I don’t even know how to explain it… not human.” Y/n nodded. “The lights flickered, the voice was so scary.”

“Wait- did you say the lights flickered?” Y/n stopped her.

“Yeah…” Y/n nodded and continued walking.

“So, where are we going?”

“To the woods, I’m meeting with Eddie Munson.”

“Wait- why?”

“To see if he has anything that can help.”

“Are you sure drugs are the answer?”

“I’m willing to do anything that can help.” Y/n nodded at her friend as they made their way across the field and behind the gate. As they were walking through the forest they came upon an old picnic table that was littered with cans and other trash. Y/n climbed onto the bench sitting on the table when she turned she saw Chrissy facing a tree.

“Chrissy?” Y/n questioned, the blonde didn’t turn around, she just started to back up. Y/n stood up stepping towards her friend, until another body crashed into Chrissy making her scream.

“Whoa, hey, hey, hey.” It was Eddie, “sorry.” he chuckled, “didn’t mean to scare you.” Chrissy looked like she had seen a ghost. “You okay?”

Chrissy looked towards the tree again, “Chrissy?” Y/n called, that’s when Eddie noticed her. Y/n stepped forward, calling out once more, before she could reach out to her friend she quickly turned around and put on a false smile. 

Eddie waved his lunch box and walked toward the table, the two girls following, Y/n kept trying to meet Chrissy’s eyes but her head remained low. Once they two were seated Eddie took off his leather jacket and tossed it on the table. He eyed Chrissy who looked pretty shaken, “There’s uh- nothin’ to worry about. Okay? No one comes out here.” he tried to reassure Chrissy. “You’re safe.” 

Once he was seated he flipped open his lunch box, “I promise.” his stupid lunch box that didn’t house food but instead housed drugs. He put his arm on the table resting his chin on his hand. “So, how does this work, exactly?” Chrissy asked.

To be honest Y/n had no idea why she was here, she just kinda sat there awkwardly by Chrissy’s side. “Aw, just like any other old sale, except, cash only, and for obvious reasons, no receipts.” Eddie explained.

“I’ll do you a half ounce for uh, twenty. What do you say? Plenty bang for your buck. Should last you a while.” Eddie held up a plastic baggy, there was a snap of a branch behind the girls and as Chrissy gasped and turned, Y/n raised an eyebrow. Something was going on.

“Hey, uh, we don’t need to do this, just give me the word and I’ll walk away. Okay?”

“It’s not that. I don’t want you to go.” Chrissy stopped the man who started to close up his lunch box. “It’s just- do you ever feel like you're losing your mind?” 

Eddie cocked his head to the side, “Uh, you know, just… on a daily basis.” He smiled at the two girls. “I feel like I’m losing my mind right now doing a drug deal with Chrissy Cunningham and Y/n L/n, the queens of Hawkins high.” 

Y/n noticed that Chrissy was getting more comfortable, no longer so tense. “You know this isn’t the first time we’ve all um… hung out.” Eddie says to the two girls.

“No?” Chrissy asks, Y/n cocks her head in question.

“You don’t remember?” Eddie asks, looking at the two cheerleaders sitting across from him.

“I’m sorry. I-” Chrissy pauses.

“That’s okay.” Eddie shakes his head, and messes with his finger until he makes the executive decision to stab himself in the chest with an invisible knife, falling on his back off the bench and onto the leafy forest floor.

Chrissy gasps and Y/n let a snort leave her lips as she tries to stifle her laughter with her hand. “I wouldn't remember me either. Honestly, do I have stuff in my hair?” he stumbled onto his feet, brushing his hands off and running his hands through his leaf infected hair. The two girls laugh as Eddie finishes fishing all the leaves out of his hair, he turns back to face them.

“You don’t remember me?” he questions the girls, Y/n starts racking her brain but to be honest after these past few years she's been trying to forget about everything from her past.

“I’m sorry.” Chrissy laughs, she turns to her friend and raises an eyebrow in question, Y/n shrugs in thought.

“Middle school, Talent show. You two were doing this cheer thing. You know…” he raised his hands shaking them as if he had cheerleading pom poms. “the thing you do. It’s pretty cool actually. And I was with my band-” the two girls cut him off, saying it in sink.

“Corroded Coffin.” they spoke, Eddie started clapping and did a little turn. Y/n’s brain thought of the much shorter, buzzed hair, little boy who played the electric guitar during a middle school talent show.

“Corro- you do remember!”

“Of course we do! With a name like that, how could we forget!”

“I don’t know, you’re a freak.” Eddie teased.

“No you just…” Chrissy trailed off, “you looked so…

“Different?” Eddie asked. “Yeah. well, my hair was buzzed and I still didn’t have these sweet ol’ tatties yet.” he pulled down the top of his shirt revealing his chest that was littered with tattoos.

“You played guitar, right?”

“Uh-huh, still do.”

“You know.” Chrissy continued, she looked over to Y/n. “Y/n here plays guitar too.”

“Bass, I play bass.” she corrected, Eddie looked at her.

“Never would’ve guessed.” he spoke.

Y/n raised an eyebrow, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, nothing. You just don’t give me the, ‘I play an instrument’ vibe.” he shrugged, “you know, you should come see us play. We play at The Hideout on Tuesdays. It’s pretty cool, we.. we get a crowd actually, of about five drunks.” Chrissy laughed as Y/n smiled at the brunette boy.

“We should.” Y/n agreed.

“It’s not exactly the Garden but you gotta start somewhere, right?” he started playfully punching a tree. Y/n took in his appearance, his dark jeans, his ‘Hellfire’ baseball tee-shirt, his belt chain, different rings, a black bandana hanging out of the back of his pants, and his long curly hair.

“You know, you’re not what I’d thought you’d be like.” the blonde trailed off.

“Mean and scary?” Eddie asked, he grabbed a piece of his hair and covered his mouth with it.

“Yeah.” Chrissy nodded.

“Yeah, well I actually thought you’d be kinda mean in scary, too.” Eddie walked back toward the table and leaned into the two girls.

“Us?” the two girls spoke, looking at each other curiously.

“Terrifying.” He sat down and grabbed his lunch box, setting it back on the table top. “Good news is flattery works with me,  so…twenty-five percent discount count for the half. Fifteen bucks.” he places down a baggy in front of the blonde. “You’re robbing me blind here, you know.”

Chrissy looked down, “do you have anything… maybe.” she stopped, “stronger?”

“Chrissy?” Y/n asked, for all Y/n knew this was her first time doing anything so going stronger would be a push. “Don’t you think you should start off slow? Ease into it?”

She shook her head, “no… I’m sure.”

“I… uh- don’t have anything on me but I can meet you tonight with it.” Chrissy nodded.

“After the game, we can meet at my trailer.” Eddie spoke.

“Yeah, that works.” Chrissy agreed.

“I won’t be able to come.” Y/n spoke to Chrissy, “I have to drop Dustin back at his house after his thingy.” Y/n remembered the promise she made to Mrs. Henderson didn't want her son to bike home in the dark so she asked Y/n to do it. Of course she said yes, after school she'd go back home then take her car back for the game.

“That’s fine. I can go alone.” Chrissy spoke to Y/n, Y/n nodded hesitantly, looking back to Eddie who was putting his jacket back on.

“Okay.” She looked over to Eddie’s hand and said the time. “We have to go to class.” she said standing up and swinging her bag over her shoulder.

“Alright.” Chrissy turned to the boy. “See you after the match in the parking lot?” Eddie nodded and Chrissy turned following Y/n out of the forest and back onto the football field.

--

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I hope you enjoyed the 2nd chapter! Reposts, comment, like so others can enjoy this story as well! it's super appreciated! Updates every sunday!

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[giganticism]

There are a few things here that I think miss interesting opportunities re: Jack, so adding my two cents in the name of fun characterization thoughts. I obvs don’t know this man and will never even meet him.

On vulnerability, we have the ESPN feature interview from early 2022 where he openly talks about how much he hated his rookie year, and even though it didn’t shake the foundation of his self-esteem, not being able to live up to his own standards and people doubting him for it did bother him, by his own words. And clearly it became something he was comfortable with admitting after the fact/when he was ready. There are also comments like Quinn saying, “He doesn't really let you guys see it, but he's a really competitive guy and deeply cares about how his team does."

To me, saying Jack has no vulnerability misunderstands that Jack seems to be intentional about maintaining his privacy in many ways, including how much he shares about how he feels. But he will make it clear where he stands when people try to mischaracterize his intentions.

See his immediate correction on how he and Trevor Zegras relate to one another as competitors:

(actual @teex gifs here)

Question: “How do you think Zegras will fair in the breakaway challenge. And part two to that, is that maybe an event you’d want to compete against him in?”

Jack: “Yeah, I mean, I think Z will do something crazy, for sure. Like I think they’re bringing him just to do something crazy, you know? So it’ll be a lot of fun. Like I’m pumped to have him there. It’ll make the weekend a lot more fun for me. But me, I don’t, like I’m more into the obstacle course. That’s something I want to be in, for sure, and try to do well in. But I don’t know. I don’t want it to be like a me versus Z thing ever. I think the media wants it to be, but at the same time, they gotta realize he’s one of my closest friends. I hope he has all the success in the world. Like, I said, I’m really excited he’s going. As a fan of the game, I hope he does something pretty outrageous too.”

See also how Trevor Zegras describes what their phone calls and texts are like:

and

Plus, in the same Athletic article, while they don’t seem to really chirp each other about hockey, they do chirp each other about things like fantasy football. Jack and his buddies do practice some emotional support and vulnerability with each other + seem to have emotional boundaries about their work, even if they’re not speaking to that often publicly.

This quick mention of Jack trying to cheer teammates up after a loss also sticks with me.

Per Luke, the Hughes brothers also "try to FaceTime each other once a week or something like that" (paywalled unfortunately) to check in mostly not about hockey. And they’re watching each other’s games when they’re not playing. Showing up for people appears to be a consistent part of Jack’s relationships. There's something fun in there, to me, for use in fics and headcanons.

There have been mentions this season too of Jack cooking friends and family dinner when they’re in Jersey, which speaks to that being important to him now. We could maybe speculate that some of the motivation for this is his interest in making Luke's rookie season as smooth as possible.

That leads me to another opportunity — Jack is dumb about things Jack doesn’t care about. When he had no interest in cooking, he was happy to know nothing about it. There’s him failing at making dinner the first time he lived alone and then deciding to basically never cook. There’s the broccoli incident during the period when Ty was cooking for Jack most of the time. But now Jack cooks all the time, and it’s reported that it’s really colorful plates he puts effort into by himself while his loved ones sit around and chat.

The Hughes brothers are also book readers (shoutout to the funny "I gotta get smarter somehow" quip from Jack), though they’re not reading a ton of fiction as far as we know publicly, so mileage may vary on how much folks judge them as ~real~ readers, I guess. But their parents (podcast, about 23 mins in) have talked about how it was important to them to establish that habit with their kids and said that academics were important in their household too. Jack was an honor roll student growing up and teachers (if you believe this Redditor, so grain of salt) describe him as a pretty quiet, unproblematic student.

Jack can be an airhead, especially about things he does not find interesting, but he’s not actually stupid. He seems to for suuuuure play up cluelessness to get out of things he doesn’t want to do though. Again, just an opportunity for fans and fic writers.

Thirdly, Jack does value being thought of as having leadership qualities. He’s also been explicit about the aspects of NHL captaincy he’s really happy to not have to do. This is the one thing I can’t remember the source of now, but there was a recent-ish interview where he was basically like “You think we want to have to talk you after losses? But he does it” re: the media. I think he was talking about Nico, but it also could’ve partially been in the context of Quinn. If anyone has a link, please let me know. [EDIT: It was ALSO on a 32 Thoughts ep and he was talking about Quinn. Thank you, @roses4buds]

So I disagree with the framing of his relationship to the captaincy. I think having an A allows Jack to bask in enough of the trust from the Devils brass to be a leader without the full responsibility of the captaincy.

But I do think it creates opportunities to explore how Jack reconciles what being “the best” means to him and how his relationship to getting a letter has prob evolved over the years.

Anyway, that’s my thought on that, but — using this as a tangential jump point to talk about Jack and Nico for a minute, for my own entertainment.

I just find their dynamic so fascinating, and I personally would bet them beginning to forge a friendship before being given permanent letters really has helped them navigate being two recent first overall talents drafted to the same struggling team. Never forget, they roomed together on the road during Jack’s rookie year and the last year of Nico’s ELC.

“I’m not very superstitious… but my one constant thing is I need like a three-hour nap. That’s my one thing. And sometimes on the road, like my first year, man, Nico was my roommate. This guy loves to sleep. And we would literally shut it down after pregame meal at like 12:45 and wake up at like 3:45-4 and then go to the game. That’s my one thing, I need a three hour nap. And Smitty doesn’t sleep much but he waits for me.” - Jack on 32 Thoughts

They’re both competitive professionals who want to be the best at what they do, but building a relationship early + the fact that they’ve been able to carve out separate identities — Nico as the uber-compassionate leader and defensive magician, Jack as the pace and play-pushing wonder that provides a quieter support — seems to allow them to both be top dogs and gain accolades without encroaching on each other’s stardom.

(actual @jonasiegenthaler gifs here)

And to call back to Jack’s comments on Zegras and how the brothers talk about their relationship as adults — Jack loves attention and praise but not to the exclusion of others.

In the words of Roman Pearce from the Fast & Furious franchise:

I tend to think that’s more Jack’s vibe. Even going back to something like setting individual NTDP records with Cole Caufied on the same play and calling out in his interview afterward that he couldn’t do it without Cole.

Or his interview at the 2023 ASG and the way he immediately was like “Quinnie deserves to be here” when given the opportunity to brag about being the only Hughes brother picked, then conceding that he’d take the bragging rights.

Wow, I’ve gone on way too long. In conclusion, I agree Jack is insecure about his height (“first of all, I’m 5’11”) and should rediscover conditioner and is capable of boneheaded brain disease like any early 20-something (“It’s about heart — not your boobs, your heart”), but I also think there’s more to mine there for characterization than we allow. Good night!

i’m in desperate need for a scholar to undertake the jhughes thesis

Jack Hughes has all the arrogance of a true American superstar, but none of the vulnerability. Jack Hughes has all the grace of an undersized, injury-prone forward, but none of the caution. Jack Hughes has all of the social status of a chosen one, but none of the leadership.

jack hughes is a middle child and despite my own lack of siblings i can Definitely tell -- the vicious competitive drive that made him become that good. quinn takes his stick and pulls out jack's braces. as much as the endless hughes brothers fascination can totally grate and i Get That you HAVE to look at each of these three as once part of a unit (especially Luke because he was drafted after Jack, and to his team -- he will only ever be in Jack's shadow, unless one day one of them leaves).

the hugheses are not a huge family -- that is, not a family of very large people -- and they've made a name for themselves as smooth-skating, agile skill players in spite of that, or perhaps to make up for it. jack as a result is notably smaller than a lot of other players both on the devils and in the league and you can Just Tell he's insecure about it. the skill his hughesness afforded him has made him better than other players his age when they were All small and size was less of an issue. when he wasn't so much of a boy among men. it was for this reason he was picked first overall, you see. when he made the NHL he was suddenly confronted by a faster game, of players who could and did just knock him to his ass, and he was suddenly thrust into a world where he wasn't the biggest fish in the usntdp pond and it threw him.

you see, that's another thing. skill in hockey means social status. they like to tell you that it doesn't, but there's a reason that the captain's most likely to be one of the best players on the team, if not outright the best. and in the usntdp jack was The Best. so he was made captain. so his teammates flocked to him. so it was allowed to all go to his head, so caufield and zegras -- the cady and gretchen to his regina george, and i don't mean that in a fun way -- congregated to him.

and now on the devils he might be the star but he's not the captain and because hockey players are Supposed to love their teammates he loves nico but nico's bigger than him and nicer than him and can grow real body hair. and jack's the darling of every teenage-girl devils fan, a fact which i understand and have minimal opinion on but fifty-fifty he either soaks up attention from or resents, or possibly both.

so yeah he's a greasy insecure uncharismatic controlling arrogant frat boy, and because he has a cute perfect smile and scores PPG people love him, and because he is not the archetype of the ubermasculine hockey superstar he believes that he is barely clinging to this thread. and i love him too don't get that mixed up

[eg-writtenthoughts]

Romance Books; Are They For Me?

I can say this with confidence, I don’t read romance novels. I grew up when Nicholas Sparks dominated bookshelves and movie theaters. I felt like they were overrated and that’s followed me all the way into my twenties. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love romance in my books. That fuzzy feeling you get from a good one liner couldn’t ruin a book for me. But the book has to have more, something happening around the romance. I prefer fantasy books that have romance.

In the last six months, we got a manager at work who loves to read, especially romance. But not the cheesy ones of the early 2000s. She reads the ones that are extremely popular right now, if you know what I mean (eyes emoji). My closest coworker reads them too, but also reads fantasy too. Well, now my two favourite coworkers are reading and discussing these books. I felt a little left out eventually. So, why not give them a try?

The experiment: I’d read three sports romance books, each one of a different sport and see what I think. I definitely intended on writing this post right after I read them so I had more to say. But I didn’t. So, please enjoy this extremely vague post.

I started with Rule Breaker by Nikki Hall. A football romance, which I thought would be perfect. In the end, I thought it was a cute book and that’s about it. Fake dating tropes are always fun. My main issue is that I felt like it was rushed and all happened a little too fast. Overall I thought it was fine.

The second read was The Deal by Elle Kennedy. This one came with a recommendation from my romance loving manager and unsurprisingly, she’s right. It’s hockey based and I realized that maybe, football isn’t the sport for me fictionally. This one was much better than Rule Breaker and it had to do with pacing. I enjoyed the boy falls first trope. It wasn’t perfect for me (I do know that I’m picky, especially in this instance where I’m trying a genre for the first time). However, Garrett Graham is great and I love him. There’s more books in the series and I don’t think I’m going to read them. I just don’t see myself reading them.

Third, Dirty Curve by Meagan Brandy. Baseball. Tutor and star of the team. Without talking about spoilers, I wondered the WHOLE time. It was shocking but meh. Maybe the easy answer was the better choice for that one. I liked that Dirty Curve was significantly slower than the other two. I should’ve realized this is something I’d want since I enjoy it in my other books. Out of the three books, it was the best.

My final thoughts? If I need a quick read or am on my period and in my feels, romance books might be what I reach for. If I don’t want to carry a book or don’t have the space, I’ll be using my Kindle app which has been stocked with all these goodies. Recently, I reached for a romance book after finishing a really heavy book and it was a great palette cleanser. Maybe one day I’ll figure out what my perfect (dark) romance book is.

[naturecpw]

Happiness:  Is Feeling Content More Important Than Purpose and Goals?

There are many ways to be happy, but we can also find comfort in the knowledge that our constant dissatisfaction is what makes us human.

The Conversation  Rafael Euba

Don’t worry, be happy.

There is much written about finding one’s life purpose and reaching self actualisation, but do we really need to have one? My partner is happy pottering around the house with his family around him, watching TV, reading the news, working in his unskilled job without responsibility, supporting his football team. Meanwhile, I am frustratingly “growing and developing”, learning, wondering what it is all about – yet without much actually changing in my life. Are drifting and feeling contented in life more important than having a “life purpose” and goals? —Brenda, Blackpool     

           Questions about happiness, purpose and goals remind me of Don Quixote, the dreaming knight in Cervantes’ novel of the same name, and Sancho Panza, his earthy page. Indeed, literature often contains characters and themes that reflect telling universal truths about human existence, experience – and psychology.    

           As the novel progresses, we realise that both characters are equally sophisticated intellectually. But while Don Quixote’s goals are utopian, romantic and clearly unobtainable, Sancho is satisfied with feeling safe and eating bread and cheese – accompanied by a little wine, of course – after each of their frustrated misadventures.    

           I’m a psychiatrist and research on personality shows that a more open and inquisitive personality will always want to seek new experiences and sensations. This is more exciting, but also less comfortable, than rejecting what feels strange or unfamiliar.    

           Don Quixote’s sensation-seeking and restless personality, as well as his lofty ideals, are the drivers of his misguided adventures. Unable to find excitement in the comfortable but mundane daily life of a landed country gentleman, he sets out to right all the wrongs in the world in the most chivalrous and valiant manner he can imagine. His ambitious goals are unobtainable, though, and so he remains chronically dissatisfied.    

           In contrast, Sancho’s goals (cheese and wine) are simple, and they are also reliable and immediately achievable. Sancho will inevitably have some difficult emotions, like every other human, that will prevent him from being consistently happy. But he will be less inclined to express his occasional periods of distress in complex existential terms – and they are unlikely to nag and torture him in the same way.    

           On one level, then, Sancho’s personality seems better suited than Don Quixote’s for achieving a satisfactory level of psychological wellbeing. But we need to consider the fact that Quixote’s tortured loftiness will also afford him occasional moments of ecstasy that Sancho will never experience. Quixote will sample all the many wondrous highs – and lows – of existence.    

Choleric Quixote

           Quixote has a type of personality that Galen, the Greek physician of classical times, would have labelled as “choleric”: passionate, charismatic, impulsive and sensation seeking. He also has an extremely rich, but equally unstable, inner life, which produces copious amounts of fantasy and emotion.    

           Soon after the second world war, a London-based psychologist called Hans Eysenck developed another personality theory that included the dimensions of extroversion and neuroticism. Quixote is high in extroversion (he engages constantly with the external world) and high in neuroticism (his emotional life is unstable and intense), a combination that would be the equivalent of Galen’s choleric personality.    

           Sancho is, of course, the exact opposite. He could be described as “phlegmatic” in Galen’s classification: he is generally introverted, and being perfectly steady in emotional terms, he would certainly score very low on neuroticism. He does not view the world through the filter of a rich but volatile inner life, and instead sees ordinary windmills where Quixote sees formidable giants.    

Don Quixote and Sancho Panza. Photo from Shutterstock.

           Personality types have been found to be predictors of psychological wellbeing in a way that could be considered relatively intuitive. Essentially, there is a positive correlation between happiness and extroversion and a negative one between happiness and neuroticism. Quixote is more neurotic than Sancho, but he is also more extroverted. The two will find and experience moments of happiness in different ways.    

           On one level, what we need to be happy is a stable (low neuroticism) and outgoing (extrovert) character. But that’s not the whole story. Those of us who see ourselves as a little more neurotic than we would ideally like – and perhaps not quite as sociable as some others – can find comfort in the knowledge that a busy and lively inner life, coupled with an inquisitive nature, can be associated with certain types of creativity.    

           The idea of happiness as a state of placidity and serenity, facilitated by a stable and untroubled psychological makeup, is persuasive. But it ignores perhaps the upper and more intense limits of human experience – and these have a power all their own. Cervantes novel, after all, is called “Don Quixote”, not “Sancho Panza”.    

Self-Actualisation

           You also mention “self-actualisation” in your question. When Abraham Maslow, the celebrated American psychologist, placed self-actualisation at the top of his hierarchy of human needs, he thought of it as a positive drive for developing one’s personal potential. Your own personal potential, Brenda, will be different to that of your partner.    

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Credit: Factoryjoe via Wikimedia Commons, CC BY-SA.

           Maslow thought that more basic needs had to be satisfied before moving up to the next level – water and food before safety, then love, self-esteem and only then self-actualisation. But subsequent research shows that humans don’t always do this in the anticipated order and that satisfying different levels of need either simultaneously, or in the “wrong order”, doesn’t seem to affect wellbeing significantly. This explains how those living in poor countries can also satisfy their psychological needs even when the fulfilment of more basic needs is uncertain.    

           In any case, having a set of needs – hierarchical or not – inevitably puts us in a needy position, and the relationship between striving to better ourselves and happiness is not a simple one. Maslow himself struggled in his personal life with issues such as racism (he was Jewish) and an awful relationship with his mother, whom he hated.    

Pain and Pleasure

           Research shows that factors such as poverty, pain and loneliness make us unhappy, and it is equally clear that pleasures of any kind contribute towards our sense of wellbeing.    

           The 19th-century British thinker John Stuart Mill postulated in simple terms that happiness is “intended pleasure, and the absence of pain” while unhappiness is “pain, and the privation of pleasure”.    

           Like Maslow and his hierarchy of needs, Mill also saw a similar hierarchy in pleasure, with the physiological at the bottom and the spiritual at the top. He also advised against too much introspection in matters of happiness, saying:    

                   Ask yourself if you are happy and you cease to be so.            

           I suspect you ask yourself this question at times, Brenda. And even though Mill saw happiness as being predicated by pleasure and pain, he also hinted that being human, with all that this implies, may bring a dissatisfaction that would be preferable to mere contentment.    

           Don Quixote is a dissatisfied man and his ambitions to achieve his glorious goals are always frustrated. He has, however, certain characteristics that have been found to be associated with happiness: an optimistic attributional style and an internal “locus” (place) of control.    

The key to happiness? Photo from Shutterstock.

           Don Quixote’s “internal locus of control” means that he feels in control of his destiny (despite all the evidence to the contrary). Control resides within him. His “optimistic attributional style”, meanwhile, refers to the fact that he always ascribes his failures to transient external forces, rather than to permanent internal issues.    

           Sancho, on the other hand, has a reactive attitude to life. He doesn’t have any fantasies about being in control of his destiny, which he believes is in the lap of the gods. “The lucky man has nothing to worry about,” he says.    

           So, in this respect at least, Don Quixote, driving his own fortune and making his own luck, is probably happier in his quest, however frustrating, than Sancho is in his passive contentment.    

Contentment Versus Happiness

           The difference between contentment and happiness, or to be more precise, the incompatibility that exists between a state of permanent contentment and being human, has also been explored in modern novels, written centuries after Miguel de Cervantes’ Don Quixote, such as The Time Machine by HG Wells or Brave New World by Aldous Huxley.    

           Some of the characters in these future dystopias, where pain and suffering have been eradicated, are perfectly placid, even content. But their insipid pseudo-happiness, devoid of choice or intense emotion, is less desirable than our own imperfect emotional tribulations – at least according to the authors.    

           Indeed, our ability to feel happy is affected by a variety of personality factors and temperamental attitudes, not by just one single dimension of placidity versus psychological restlessness, or even optimism versus pessimism.    

           But does it matter anyway? Whether we are “half-empty” or “half-full” personalities, none of us is designed to be happy – only, ultimately, to survive and reproduce. Consequently, we will all battle with frequent unpleasant emotions, whatever our temperament.    

           It is good, Brenda, that you haven’t given up your efforts to grow as a person and that you remain hungry for knowledge. Even if I told you that there is a better strategy for happiness, that you should be content with watching television and little else, I am pretty certain you wouldn’t want that.    

           You need to continue being who you are, even if being who you are doesn’t transport you to a state of sustained and uninterrupted psychological bliss. Our nature is to chase the teasing and elusive butterfly of happiness, not always to capture it. Happiness can’t be bottled and bought and sold.    

           It can, however, be a journey – and this never-ending quest includes you, Brenda, as well as your partner. And perhaps we can all find comfort in the knowledge that our nagging dissatisfaction is a key part of what makes us human.    

Rafael Euba is a Consultant and Senior Lecturer in Old Age Psychiatry at King's College London.

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[softprincesso]

✨ HOW TO BECOME A WEALTHY MIDDLE AGED MAN✨

PT.2: Overview to understanding different saving/retirement methods, investments, and forms of income

Pt. 2.2 Overview of Investments

Welcome lovelies to (what I hope will be) a helpful series on gaining wealth and becoming financially literate and independent!

Disclaimer: Check other posts. It's too long to keep typing out.

Now comes (what I believe) is the fun part of money. Making it grow.

Investments are defined as “an asset or item acquired with the goal of generating income or appreciation.” Essentially, anything you purchase with the belief that in time it will be worth more. This includes the entire stock market, cryptocurrencies, art, real estate, jewelry, vintage coins, designer bags, etc. Of course, some of these take more time and each comes with some amount of risk. These variables change according to your strategy as an investor.

✨THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND✨

Begin as a Beginner

Do not overwhelm yourself during your financial literacy journey by trying to learn everything, all at once, while also trying it all out. The thing that creates the most confusion when learning is believing the lie that you can multitask well. Yes, start with a brief overview of the systems and institutions (what we are currently doing in the series) but literally all you need to start is definitions and a gist so that you can comprehend how they connect later on. Learning an entire world that has never been taught to you is going to take time, and I’m talking years. And then, when you think you have something down your going to mess up or read an article about how the stock you saw yesterday for $6 is now $1000 and you’re going to be frustrated (this happens a lot). But, If you want to learn about the stock market, focus on the stock market. Retirement still scares you, focus on that until you master it and have a plan. And for Christ’s (or whatever deity/person/universe you believe in) if you do not have a steady stream of income do not put your last pennies trying to get into crypto (or any investing truly). This is something to start after you have income, a savings, a retirement, and have paid off at least most debts.

Recommended sources to learn more:

Netflix has a great series called “Explained” where (you guessed it) they explain things. While I recommend every episode because you can never learn too much, there are ones specifically dedicated to the stock market, cryptocurrencies, and billionaires each that helps to uncomplicate the history and purpose of each of these things.

✨Let’s get started✨

The Stock Market

“Stock markets are real and electronic exchanges that enable the buying and selling of securities. The most popular include the NYSE, Nasdaq MarketSite, and Tokyo Stock Exchange.” Let me, let you, in on a little secret-the stock market is essentially fantasy football (sorry, my American is showing) but with companies. When you buy a security, you are betting that (in the long run or short run, depending on your strategy) that a certain company will perform well and gain profits, which in turn will gain you money on what you bet. There are two categories of players in the market which include the assets (the football players) and the investors (the betting public). Of the assets you can categorize further by what position they play on the field…

Stocks

Most well-known, but the riskiest. The “star” player that everyone hypes up and takes all the credit. Stocks are fractional pieces of publicly traded companies, and by buying a stock you own a relative size of that company. They are either “paying you” through growth (when their stock price rises) or through dividends (when they send you a piece of their profits directly).

Mutual Funds

Less known but a safer bet than single stocks. Popular among those in middle age. “Mutual funds are baskets of stocks or bonds. They come in all different shapes and sizes, from covering broad stock market indexes to focusing on specific sectors.” When you buy a mutual fund, you are saying that you believe on average that pile of stocks/bonds are going to do well, instead of betting on a single player. Usually they are actively managed by people who are trying to “beat” the market for you. Statistically good for the short term, long term are less effective than ETFs.

Index Funds: a subset of mutual funds that are passively managed and track indexes like an ETF but trade like a mutual fund (once at the end of the day and without reliance of supply and demand)

ETFs

Exchange traded funds. The up-and-coming underdog that’s gaining popularity. These are passively managed baskets of stocks and bonds that track over a specific index like the S&P 500. They work like stocks, being traded throughout the day, relying on supply and demand, while giving a lot of the advantages that mutual funds do. They also come with their own set of disadvantages but are still a great way to diversify a portfolio inexpensively.

Bonds

The reliable bench players you know you can put in to save a game. Great safe bets that can generate a steady income. Bonds work like a loan for a regular person, except for a company. You can loan your money to a company which will pay you a principal plus a fixed interest back every specified period. There are different types which come with different advantages and strategies, so make sure to read the fine print.

Commodities

Tangible goods that go into manufacturing-Gold, oil, metals, corn, soybeans, etc. A good defensive team to have in the game for a hedge against inflation or economic troubles. They trade in a commodity exchange. You can still access them through most brokers.

Source to look into for deeper understanding and questions: https://www.investopedia.com/terms/i/investment.asp

Easy way to get started quickly:

1. Create a brokerage account: There are lots of accounts to choose from, but I would go for accounts that have zero fees and no minimum, this is starting to become the norm but once upon a time you had to give a minimum investment of $5000 to get started. I personally use Charles Schwab and Robinhood. I love all of the tools and accounts Schwab has and Robinhood is just easy to use.

2. Sign up: this may take a day or two to finalize, especially with banks but it shouldn’t be a big deal

3. Connect a card or account to transfer funds

4. Buy your first security: I would start off with simply looking up beginner investments on google. I recommend either an ETF, index fund, or choose a company that you have an interest in because you will be more likely to keep up on their news

5. Tip: think long term as a beginner. Sure, once you start learning and understanding you can change your strategy to gain more in a shorter time, but this comes with much more risk. Do not be an idiot and sell all of your stock when you see your investment plummet nor sell as soon as you see it go up a little. The best advice for a beginner: Buy a stock and leave it alone (for YEARS)

Property/Real Estate

There are many ways to invest in real estate-you can buy a property, you can invest in a property fund, you can become a landlord,or you can flip a property. Again, depending on the strategy, will change the risk and reward you have taken on. All of these options are usually on the more cash heavy side but can reap a lot of rewards if done right.

Source to look into:

https://www.nerdwallet.com/article/investing/5-ways-to-invest-in-real-estate

Easy way to get started quickly:

1. Buy a real estate ETF or fund, you can just look this up on google or through your brokerage

2. OR you could look into buying a property near you and renting it out if you have that much cash (Make sure to do your research, this can get pretty complicated)

Art

Also considered property but until recently it was incredibly hard to invest in art without significant cash and contacts available. Now, there are platforms like Masterworks where you can buy a fraction of a piece like a stock of Monet and you get the rise in appreciation. However, it still is for those with money already available, I believe you have to invest a minimum of $2500 to get started on MW.

Sources to look into: https://www.investopedia.com/articles/pf/08/fine-art.asp

Crypto

Cryptocurrencies are digital currencies that are not backed by real or tangible assets or goods, but on the trust and value of the people that use them, and supply and demand. They can be traded like stocks on an exchange and are tracked with a digital ledger on the blockchain. The first cryptocurrency was Bitcoin and the rest that have followed are categorized as altcoins (alternative coins).

The stage of cryptocurrencies we are in is likened to the early 90s with the internet. Not a lot people truly understand the blockchain (the vast ledger space which contains every transaction made securely in encrypted “blocks” that are then “chained” together so that if one block is compromised the whole chain shuts it down.) It is decentralized and written simultaneously on thousands of super computers. The beauty of it is that if one ledger on one computer is somehow hacked or wrong the rest of the computers storing the ledger interrupt and either fix it or shut it down. A way to understand it is blockchain is to the internet as bitcoin is to a website, but the internet runs off people trusting the system, blockchain runs off trusting no one.

The currencies that run on blockchain can have a multitude of purposes, but bitcoin was really just the starting solution to fix the problem of trust on the internet. People wanted a secure, anonymous, untraceable way to spend money online, like cash is in the real world. And while for the most part it is just that, it isn’t completely anonymous. Like in the real world if you buy something from Mcd*nalds with cash that transaction is still recorded in their system and through a receipt. Your crypto transactions are recorded in the blockchain, but most people don’t even know how to access the ledger so for now any ill*cit purchases you make are pretty safe.

I HIGHLY recommend looking into a cryptocurrency course or training just because there is so much that goes into it and lots of details that can help you. This investment is incredibly risky and volatile! I only would suggest investing an amount you are completely comfortable to lose ALL of.

Sources to learn more:

https://www.investopedia.com/cryptocurrency-4427699

Easy to get started quickly (Please dear lord do your research first):

1. Sign up on a crypto exchange like Coinbase or Binance, some brokers (like Robinhood) also allow you to trade crypto but it’s a very limited selection

2. Do lots of research!! (I’m going to say it until you get it, and I don’t think you get it yet)

3. Think of it like stocks, if you read up on the coin and its purpose, and think that it’s going to be useful soon or in the future, then invest

4. Tip: the crypto market moves MUCH faster than the stock market and is much more sensitive. In just these last few days (literally hours) bitcoin was trading at $40,000+, the following day, for whatever reason (people got scared, people wanted to sell to get profits, etc.) it will barely hold $33,000. So, invest wisely!

This is very brief list of the main investments. There is still a lot of depth each of these goes into and especially with things like crypto, information changes 24/7. I hope you have learned by now that you should be continually learning as well. Instead of spending your morning looking at your Instagram feed of bum friends, dusty men, and “models” spend it reading the paper and catching up on the market. Follow investors and billionaires like you follow celebrities and see how much smarter you become. At the end of the day winners focus on winning, losers focus on winners.

With love,

O

[thedreadvampy]

Something I find really interesting, and would quite like to hear American's opinions on, is the deeply engrained assumption in American pop culture that rigidly structured high school cliques are a natural fact of life.

my school in the UK had friend groups, sure - I hung out with the library gang and the art kids and the goth kids and there were girls who'd definitely sneer at me if I tried to sit next to them - but there's something very rigid, impermeable and above all hierarchical about the depiction and assumptions about American high school that I just don't recognise. Like my school had mean girls who liked makeup and hated school, but they weren't At The Top Of The Social Hierarchy as far as I could tell (in fact mostly they were seen as uhhhh chavvy? trashy?) they had power in that they weren't worried about being mean but they weren't glorified by people outside their friendship group, they just had friends who would back them up. and it's not like a different friend group/clique had that social power. the social politics of my school at least were a lot muddier than that. there was certainly bullying and social exclusion but it wasn't top-down in the way people talk about like. jocks and popular girls or whatever. the same people end up on the bottom but nobody's on top.

and the impermeability of this assumed clique structure is super weird to me. the like YOU CAN'T DO SPORTS YOU'RE A THEATRE KID or YOU CAN'T DATE HER SHE'S A GOTH AND YOURE A NERD or whatever teen movie nonsense.

and like obviously a lot of it is teen movie nonsense. it's obviously heightened for effect and narrative convenience. but both from the prevalence of the type and from the way Americans talk about their own high school experience it seems like it's resonating with the American high school reality in a way it absolutely does not resonate with mine. I read American non-fiction books about surviving highschool as a teenager and they might as well have been high fantasy for all the direct relevance they had to my experience.

If it is an actual thing in America, my guess it that a lot of it has to do with the position of competitive sports in school funding and with really external artificial constructs of popularity like prom/homecoming royalty. like British schools have proms and cheerleading and competitive sports but a lot of the culture around that is American exports. school dances as anything other than a basic disco and cheerleading as a concept only really entered the British cultural lexicon in the last few decades. schools do compete in sports but it's a lot less tied to funding than in the US and it's way, way less of a big deal. I mean we kind of knew about it when a kid in our school tried out for the Olympic track trials but like. only just. and as far as I can tell school spirit is really only a thing for very posh schools. where people do have school spirit it's much more organised on class lines and more likely to involve students getting in fights than like school v school formal competition (like our school had real mutual beef with the public (private, in American parlance) school down the road, but more in a sniping at each other and periodically boys beating each other up way than like a GO SCHOOL BEAT THEM AT A FOOTBALL way)

and to be wholly fair I had an atypical British school experience so I'm speaking from a limited perspective. I went to a small country secondary (about 1200 students) with a very class-diverse student population who were all from nearby small town and village communities and had largely gone to the same handful of small primary schools, and other than the public school and the Catholic school it was the only option for kids in the area. I don't know whether larger, more urban schools with more local competition have a more cliquey/competitive high school culture (I know my partners who went to school in London certainly experienced house parties that looked a lot more like the ones in TV and film).

Idk what was your high school experience like? Are cliques a thing? I've been obsessed with the veracity of American high school cliques since I was like 13 I need Data.

[css1992]

could u do more high school au's pls? I was thinking maybe rich popular peter who seems untouchable and then grungy tony who just doesnt care for appearances and hes been pining after peter his whole school life

+

could u make it so that tony is rich and everyone knows it but he just doesn't care about his money and doesnt act rich so it's one of those things that u know but dont acknowledge. also if tony's daddy issues made an appearance id be so happy ty.

I’m so sorry for the delay, but I really do hope this scratches your itch! 

***

He had that sort of beauty that almost hurt to look at. So pure and soft. Pink cheeks, small eyes that squinted when he laughed – which was often –; brown, wavy hair, so shiny and silky-looking; thin, pink lips, always stretched in a smile. He had the most beautiful smile Tony had ever seen, too. Honest and wide, happy.

He was never alone. Of course he wasn’t. He was too magnetic, there were always people drawn to his light, following him around, laughing at his jokes, making him laugh in return. Everyone seemed to want a piece of him, a scrap of his attention. And he, being the lovely human being that he was, made room for anyone who wished to bask in his light.

Jocks liked him. Peter was great at team sports, he was light on his feet and good with his hands. He wasn’t in any teams, though, claimed he didn’t have the time, but he was always picked first in P.E. group activities. Tony knew, watched him at practice way too often – from a distance, of course, as he did his stretches and sit-ups with Rhodes.

Nerds liked him, too. He was really smart, an asset to the Decathlon team, and was always willing to help anyone having trouble in class. Even the weirdos from drama club, glee club and the school band loved him – he never made fun of them, on the contrary, he was always very vocal about how talented they were and how he wished he could be a part of their clubs, too.

Girls swooned at him. He was kind and sweet, a good listener, and gorgeous. Guys weren’t immune to his charms, either. The ones Tony knew for a fact that were gay or bi didn’t even try to pretend they didn’t watch him when he walked down the halls, but even supposedly straight guys, like Steve Rogers, sneaked a peek now and then, face flushed, if he was wearing specially tight jeans.

Tony was jealous of all those people, but he learned to deal with it. He’d been, well, admiring him from a distance for years. He was used to seeing people make passes at him, ask him out. Peter was discreet, though. If he ever dated anyone, nobody ever heard anything about it. He was a mystery, Tony wasn’t even sure if he was gay, straight, bi or whatever – there were rumors that he had made out with Wade Wilson in freshman year, but neither of them confirmed or denied it. Tony hated the guy anyway.

“If you keep staring, people are gonna know you’re in love and not actually dead inside,” Rhodey spoke up right next to him, taking a huge bite of his tuna sandwich. Tony averted his gaze from Peter’s table for a minute and looked at his friend, annoyed. “It’s gonna ruin your whole aesthetic.”

“Very funny,” He rolled his eyes and looked back at Peter. There were so many people around him he could barely catch a glimpse of his smile, which was annoying.

His dad’s company, Parker Innovations, had just released a new phone a few weeks earlier, it was ridiculous how many people thought they could get one for free if they kissed his ass hard enough. At least Tony didn’t have to endure that kind of nonsense anymore. People in that school learned very early on that even though he was related to Howard Stark, he wanted nothing to do with the guy – or his company, or his money. They also learned sucking up to him did nothing but annoy him, so they kind of just forgot he existed over time and he blended right in with everyone else – a blessing in its own right.

“Rhodey is right, you’re drooling, it’s a little embarrassing,” Natasha looked at him with boredom as she nibbled on her fries. “You should just ask him out, you’ve been pining for ages.”

“I’m not pining,” he huffed, irritated, and the redhead smirked, raising a perfectly manicured brow.

“Right, yearning might be more accurate. Bruce?” She glanced at their other friend who scratched his chin, pretending to think about it.

“I think obsessing sounds more like it. Rhodey?”  

“Fuck you guys,” he barked before they could keep the game going, and all three laughed at him. Someone got up from Peter’s table and he caught a glimpse of his beautiful face, their eyes made contact for half a second and Tony looked away.

“No, but seriously, Tones. Just go talk to him, he’s a great guy, I’m sure he wouldn’t be an ass about it.” Bruce adjusted his glasses and said that like it was simple. Like he would have the guts to do it if he was in Tony’s position – he wouldn’t, he’d pined for Thor, an exchange student, for a year, and never worked up the courage to ask him out. The guy went back to Norway or whatever and Bruce never even said hi to him.

“I know, of course he wouldn’t, but I don’t wanna be one of those people begging for his attention, just look at that.” He pointed at the little crowd around him, people were almost literally fighting for his attention, the poor guy could barely finish his lunch. “It’s ridiculous.”

“Yeah, but you’re not them,” Natasha said that like it was the most obvious thing in the world and Tony frowned.

“How am I different?”

“You’re a certified genius, you and him have similar interests and you look hot in a ‘I’m gonna fuck  you raw in the back of my car’ kinda way. I don’t know, maybe he’s into that.” The redhead shrugged, again, saying all that like it was obvious and an unquestionable truth.

“Yeah, right, sounds just like him,” Tony scoffed.

Peter was perfect in so many ways – perfect face, perfect body, perfect grades, Tony was sure he pooped out candy or something – of course he wouldn’t go for a guy like him. He had a bad reputation, he was in detention more often than not and people in general considered him an asshole – all because he didn’t partake in their little games of social climbing or whatever. No, Peter wouldn’t go for his grungy ass. He’d probably go for all American, apple pie, boy-next-door Steve Rogers.

“No, she’s right, I’ve seen him looking at you several times.” Bruce pointed out, not for the first time, and Tony scoffed.

“Oh, yeah? When?”

“AP chemistry class. I’m his lab partner, remember?” How could Tony forget? As Mr. Erskine called out their names, Tony prayed to a God he didn’t even believe in that he’d be paired up with Peter, but no such luck. “He stares at you whenever he has a chance or an excuse. You know, when you blow things up, for example.”

“Yeah, which is why he must stare, he must be afraid for his life.” Tony hated to admit that he was way more prone to causing explosive accidents when Peter was in the room. It was fucking embarrassing.

He sighed, drinking the last of his coke. No matter what his friends said, he knew he didn’t stand a chance with Peter. He was… Untouchable. He was too good for him, Tony wasn’t even sure he’d want to taint him if he had a chance –  no, scratch that, he definitely would.

He chose to watch him from afar, allowing himself a few fantasies and daydreams. He had this really stupid and lame one, where he walked up to Peter in the hall, people just parted to let him through, then he gave him his trademark, lopsided grin and asked him out. Peter smiled brightly up at him, holding his books to his chest, cheeks flushed, eyelashes fluttering as he whispered a shy “yes” and leaned up to kiss him. Yeah. That was the whole fantasy.

Peter was so untouchable to him that he didn’t even dare to dream further than that. Of course when he was alone in his room, late at night, relieving himself, a few… less pure fantasies popped up unsolicited, but he felt so guilty then, dirty even, like he was disrespecting him somehow. It was all very confusing, but he still came, shamefully, to the thought of his beautiful face scrunched up in pleasure as dream-Tony fucked him.

The bell rang and everyone hurried to get to their next period, Peter was no different, he gathered his things and stood up, looking around the cafeteria like he was looking for someone. Their eyes met again for a second, but Tony quickly looked away, grabbing his backpack in a hurry to leave.

It was Thursday, the worst day of the week for him, none of his friends were free to hang out with him until later, so he either had to head home and deal with Howard or he had to find somewhere to be for a couple of hours, until Rhodey was done with football practice so they could go to his place. That day, Tony decided to just stay by his car, smoking a cigarette and singing along to Black Sabath’s Iron Man, it wasn’t like he had anywhere to go. He was so distracted watching the smoke dissipate into thin air that he didn’t notice when someone approached, and jumped almost a foot in the air when they spoke.

“Aren’t you afraid of getting caught smoking on school grounds?” Tony almost dropped dead when he registered the angelic voice. He was already having a heart attack as it was, but the boy was so close and he had that beautiful smile in place, blushing cheeks and all. It took almost a full minute for him to calm himself down.  

“I won’t tell if you don’t.” The older teen answered when he finally found his voice and got his breath under control enough not to make a fool of himself. Peter smiled wider, biting his lower lip.

“Your secret is safe with me.” He fake whispered, leaning a little into the older boy’s space and he almost choked on nothing. Peter’s smell was inebriating, expensive and sweet, but not overly so – perfect. He recomposed himself quickly, though, and nodded, but didn’t say anything else. He wasn’t sure why Peter was talking to him and, frankly, he was too fucking nervous to think of anything cool to say. The younger teen deflated a little faced with Tony’s silence; he looked around, seeming a little lost. “You’re Tony, right?”

Fuck, the way he said his name. His name. It was fucking music to his ears, the most beautiful tune. But how did he even know his name? Sure, he was Tony Stark, so not really anonymous, but people often forgot about it.

“Yeah. And you’re Peter.” Tony didn’t play games, he didn’t even try to pretend like he didn’t know who Peter was. It would be dumb anyway, everybody knew him. The other boy nodded shyly, it looked like he wanted to say something else, but he kept biting his lips and looking around nervously. Tony frowned. “Is everything okay?”

“No. I mean, yeah, sure, it’s fine, it’s just, uhm. I have a flat tire and the wheel bolts are really tight and I couldn’t get them off, so I thought – I mean, could you, uh –“ He gestured wildly as he stuttered out his answer, looking in the general direction of his flashy, cherry red sports car. “I mean, it’s okay if you’re busy, but I –“

“Sure, I’ll help, don’t worry.” Tony threw his cigarette butt on the ground and stepped on it. He was a little more at ease now that he knew why Peter was talking to him – he just needed help – and the best thing was, Tony was really good with cars. Of course, one didn’t need to have a PhD in mechanics to change a tire, but it still made him feel really good that he would be able to help properly.

“Thanks, you’re a life saver.” The chirpy attitude was back, as well as the smile, it made Tony’s heart flutter. He nodded sharply, looking away from his face, and gestured for Peter to lead the way.

When they reached his car, Tony whistled lowly, crouching down to look at the completely flat tire, as he tried to find the source of the problem. He was surprised to notice a two-inch cut on the surface of it, and it didn’t seem accidental.

“Fuck, Peter, it looks like someone sliced your tire.” When he looked up at the younger boy, he didn’t look surprised, but nervous. It was an odd reaction. Tony wondered if Peter already knew that – maybe he knew who did it and was scared of them? It made Tony’s blood boil. Why would anyone do that to Peter?

“Wh-what? How do you know that?” He bit his lower lip nervously, scratching his arm, and Tony frowned, worried.

“Here, look.” He gestured for Peter to crouch down next to him and pointed at the cut. “This is clearly a stab mark. Judging by the size and shape of it, I’d say this was probably done with a pocketknife.”

“Oh. Yeah, of course. Clearly.” He face-palmed, like he felt stupid, maybe for not seeing it before, but Tony still worried.

“If you want, I could go with you to the administration. We can ask them to check the security cameras. I think that one might have caught whoever did this.” He pointed at a security camera nearby, Tony knew where all of them were in the parking lot area – he’d been caught smoking way too many times not to know.

“What? There are –? I mean, look, it’s okay, it’s probably just someone trying to play a prank, it’s no big deal, it’s fine.” He stood up quickly, shaking his head, and Tony was positive he felt threatened somehow, he was acting so weird.

“If you’re sure… But if you change your mind, I’ll go with you, ok?” Tony stood up and took off his leather jacket. The weather was nice, just a bit chilly, so he was wearing a thin, white t-shirt with short sleeves underneath. He thought he heard Peter’s breath hitch for a second, but it was probably just his imagination. “Can you hold this for me?” He held out his jacket and the boy blushed, blinking rapidly.

“S-sure.”

Tony bit his bottom lip to refrain from asking, again, if everything was fine. Peter looked so freaking nervous, he was even sweating a little at the temples. Tony was positive he knew who did that to his car, but didn’t want to tell him for some reason. Maybe he wanted to protect whoever did it, maybe it was a boyfriend, or an ex. He gritted his teeth, hands closing in fists, but didn’t say anything, just crouched down and got to work.

The first bolt came off easily, it wasn’t tight at all, so he thought maybe Peter had already loosened it when he tried earlier. The second and third ones came off just as easily, though, only the fourth one was a little trickier, but nothing the younger teen couldn’t have handled himself. Tony thought maybe he hadn’t tried too hard, maybe he was afraid the person who did that would show up or something. He was so glad he was there to help, he wondered if Peter felt safe with him around, and the thought made him feel oddly proud and protective of him.

He made quick work of changing the tires, making sure not to screw the bolts too tight, then put the sliced one in the trunk of the car. When he turned around to look at Peter, he was looking intently at him, almost hypnotized, holding his jacket close to his chest like it was a puppy.

“All done.” Tony smiled and the boy seemed to snap out of a trance.

“Oh, thank you so much, really, you’re too kind.” He smiled broadly and the older teen scratched the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Don’t mention it.” They were silent for a few seconds after that, but Peter kept holding his jacket and didn’t make any move to give it back to him. “Uhm, could I–?” He gestured towards the jacket and again the boy jumped up in surprise.

“Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, here.” He handed it to him and quickly crossed his empty arms over his chest. “So, uhm,… Your dad is having a gala this weekend, right? Are you gonna be there?” Ah, so Peter did know who he was, not just his first name. The older teen leaned against the car and stuck his hands in his pockets, shrugging.

“Not if I can help it.” He smirked, trying to act cool, but now that he didn’t have anything to do with his hands, he was growing nervous.

“Oh,” Peter looked… disappointed? He dropped his gaze to the floor, shuffling his feet, and Tony stood up straight, frowning.

“Why?”

“Nothing, it’s just – my parents are going, so I thought I’d tag along to, you know... but it’s okay.” He kicked an imaginary rock and avoided Tony’s eyes. The older teen stared at him with wide eyes, heart beating fast – what was the end of that sentence? Peter couldn’t possibly mean–

“I don’t – what, you’d go to, like, hang out with me or something?” He felt stupid when he stumbled on the words, but Peter didn’t seem to notice, his cheeks were burning red and he was looking anywhere else but at Tony.

“I mean, you must have much better things to do, of course, I was just –” He chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his head, finally looking up at Tony. “Sorry, just forget about it, I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“No, wait!” He rushed to interrupt him and Peter looked back at him with huge, Bambi eyes. Tony coughed awkwardly, blushing a little. “I mean, like, uhm… If you – would you wanna go as my date? To the gala?” He blurted out, finally, because what the hell. The worst that could happen was Peter say no, and he could deal with it. He would survive, for sure. It wouldn’t be a big deal. Really. It wouldn’t.

But he didn’t say no, he smiled broadly, eyes twinkling in excitement.

“I’d love to!” He answered quickly, and Tony’s heart fluttered, Peter looked genuinely happy.  “Could you – uhm, text me what color of tie you’ll be wearing? If you want! I understand if you think it’s lame, but I thought–”

“No, it’s fine.” His heart was beating so loud, Peter Fucking Parker wanted to coordinate ties with him, it was fucking corny and cliché and he loved it. “Uhm, here, give me your number.” He fished his phone from his back pocket and gave it to the younger teen.

“Cool.” Peter typed in his number and as soon as he gave his phone back, Tony sent him a smiley face so he would have his number, too. “Cool, cool, cool...” He rocked on the balls of his feet and looked around, like he was looking for something else to say.

“So… Do you have to be home soon or…?” Tony stuck his hands in his pockets again, wondering if maybe he was pushing his luck, but Peter shook his head quickly.

“Not really, no, my parents don’t really mind what time I get home as long as I let them know. You?”

“They don’t really care.” He shrugged, taking one step closer to Peter. “So… are you hungry, by any chance?”

“I’m starving.” He nodded, looking up at Tony in anticipation. It drove the butterflies in his stomach crazy.

“I know a place where they serve great burgers. We could go in my car and I could drop you off here on our way back, I’m just a little worried someone is gonna try to fuck up your car again. I mean, what if they’re targeting you or something?” Just the mention of what happened earlier made Peter nervous. He stuck his hands in the pockets of his bomber jacket and shook his head.

“Oh, don’t worry about it, I’m sure it’s fine.” He didn’t look worried, though, at least not anymore.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, trust me, I am.” Tony found the sudden change odd, but thought maybe he was just trying to play it cool, so he let it go.  

“Okay, then, c’mon, my car is right there,” Tony gestured to his car and Peter smiled, taking his hands off his pockets. When he did, though, something slipped out and fell to the ground with a metallic noise. Tony quickly crouched down to get it for him, when he noticed what it was. “Wh – is that…?” He frowned, examining the pocketknife as if it was alien material. He was confused at first, because Peter didn’t seem like the kind of guy to carry one around, but then it dawned on him. When he looked at the younger teen, his face was so red it looked like he was about to explode.

“Uhm… If I told you I’ve never seen this before in my life would you believe it?” He chuckled nervously, scratching his arm, as Tony stood up. The older teen raised a brow at him.”Sorry, I just – I wanted an excuse to talk to you.” He said quietly, dropping his gaze.

“You know, you could have gone with the weather or whatever.” Tony answered, amused, and it made the younger boy look up at him.

“You’re just very intimidating,” He looked at him with huge, scared eyes, and Tony cocked his head to the side.

“Me?” He raised a brow.

“Yeah.” Peter answered pointedly, and Tony smirked, offering him his knife back.

“You do realize you just sliced your own tire so you’d have an excuse to talk to me, right? And I’m intimidating?” He joked, but Peter didn’t seem to find it funny. He winced and covered his face with his hands, clearly embarrassed.

“You must think I’m such a freak,” He groaned, voice muffled by his palms.

“Hey, hey, yes, I do think you’re a freak.” He grabbed Peter’s thin wrists and marveled at how perfectly they fit in his hands. He definitely saved that thought for later. “But you’re a really cute one.” He grinned and Peter chuckled, a delicate flush rising onto his cheeks.

“I feel stupid.” He admitted, worrying his bottom lip, but Tony shook his head, working up the nerve to cup Peter’s face in his hand.

“I feel flattered,” He said, honestly, and Peter’s breath hitched. He stared up at Tony, eyelashes fluttering, moist, pink lips slightly open. The older teen leaned down slowly and when the Peter closed his eyes, their lips touched. Just like in his fantasies, Peter tasted sweet, his lips were soft and his arms circled Tony’s neck in a warm embrace. When they parted, Tony smiled down at him, stroking his blushing cheek. “Just promise that if this doesn’t work out you won’t, like, key my car or something.”

“Oh, God,” he groaned, but they both laughed out loud, as they walked hand in hand across the parking lot.

[a-shakespearean-in-paris]

Hi! I found your Dragon Age fanfictions on Ao3 and love them and sometimes check your blog too but don't have tumblr. What is this whole controversy about being 30 and liking Cullen being wrong? I feel like I'm missing something. Anyway, I'm 32, married, expecting twins and never felt too old for Bioware games. WTF

Hi there, thank you for the support, it means a lot! And congrats! :D

Well, to make a long story somewhat short, recently a video circulated on tumblr from TikTok, one of those “what your favorite X says about you” videos that’s pretty common on the platform, if a bit overdone. This one was a “What your Favorite Dragon Age romance says about you.” Some jokes I’ll admit I found somewhat funny, others just made no sense. (Someone explain how liking Isabela gives you “mommy issues,” I still don’t get that.)

However, what was most egregious to many, myself included, was what this person said about Cullen romancers. According to this person, all Cullen fans are “thirty year old white moms” who are “creepy,” and “Cullen won’t save our failing marriage,” and we need to “go back to making our kids chicken nuggets.”

So, various bloggers broke down what was wrong with this, other than the fact that’s it’s just plain not correct about Cullen fans (Hi there everyone, in case you didn’t know, I’m very Polynesian and a huge Cullen fan, also not a mom yet, though I would like to be one someday. :) )But the breakdown of why these statements are problematic is as follows (under the cut for length):

1. The comments were ageist. The TikToker wielded “thirty year old white mom” like it’s some sort of insult.  There is literally nothing wrong with enjoying a game at thirty, literally nothing wrong with being a mom and enjoying a game. I have news for everyone: when you have kids your life or personality outside of being a Mom doesn’t end. To this end, the comments came across as gatekeep-y.

2. The comments were also misogynistic. A woman in the kitchen joke… in 2020. Not only that, but related to the above, it implies that women can’t have hobbies outside of being a mom when they turn a certain age, and do you see the same thing being said about men and their sports teams, or fantasy football? I don’t know why it’s viewed as cringey to be a part of fandom when you’re an adult woman but dudes can still collect their Star Wars memorabilia into their thirties and beyond. Especially when:

3. Dragon Age is rated mature, and it’s always had the M rating even when it was just Origins. This is a game for adult audiences. If you’re engaging with the media online, I am going to assume you’re an adult. Not only that, this is an eleven year old franchise. People who played the games in 2009 can still enjoy them even if some of them have had kids during this eleven year period.

4. Related to that: most, if not all the developers, I’d imagine, are probably over 30. Should they stop making the games for us and make their kids chicken nuggets instead? Is this why we don’t have DA4?!

5. Cullen’s exact age is unclear from canon, he was probably around 18 in Origins, but there’s no way he’s not under thirty come Inquisition. A thirty-year-old crushing on another thirty year old is creepy because…?

6. I haven’t seen others mention this, but it’s something I gathered. To me, the video subtly implied the TikToker’s view that women need to settle down by the time their thirty with kids, which is pretty heteronormative IMO. I’m just not here for that you’re thirty you need settle down BS. I’m 26 and I get crap for being single, which is a whole other pile of BS I won’t get into here. I would like to someday, but there is nothing wrong with being 30 or above and single with no kids. No one has to “settle down” if they don’t want to, there’s no age where you have to “grow up” and stop engaging with things you enjoy.

Being involved in a few different fandoms I don’t see all the discourse but I did happen to see this, and as I said earlier I do not think the person who made the video meant any real harm. I understand the intent was to joke, but people can harm others under the guise of “jokes” all the time. I can tell you in my life, people have “joked” with me about needing to put on a grass skirt and dance the hula, and not understood why I’ve been offended because they just meant to be funny. Casual racism isn’t funny and neither is casual misogyny or ageism.

It was also discouraging to see people on the tik toker’s video laughing at the Cullen joke for being true, as apparently we need to “find a better romance.” And this lead me to say something in a post which I’ll repeat here, as this video managed to trudge up the same old discourse I’ve seen periodically on tumblr about Cullen since I’ve been here in 2017, and mind you, I started writing/tumblr THREE YEARS after Inquisition’s release: that all his fans are boring, basic, idiot women who just like him because he’s traditionally handsome and we just ignore his flaws in favor of his looks, and also he’s just the basic white guy in a slew of “more interesting” romances. Heck, early in this blog’s creation, I could see discourse within Cullen fandom about the “right” way to portray him. (I won’t get into this right now though, it’s a whole other kettle of fish, and this is a pretty nuanced topic in an already nuanced topic.) Speaking for myself, I actually don’t gravitate towards pretty boys. Cullen won me over with his mature romance route. And I like his arc in Inquisition and think it’s a good redemption-esque arc considering this franchise has a lot of characters to develop— but that’s another story as well.

Anyway, I digress. To me the post was less about Cullen and more about “older women” in fandom and how to some find older women here creepy. (and I’m sorry but if you think 30 is “old” I have to laugh.) Also, I have a secret for you: “older” women built fandom spaces as we know it, and we owe a lot of debt to those who paved the way for us to enjoy content, from the early days of the Star Trek fandom, and even before with fan zines.

Fandom is for everyone, and can we stop trying to box people who like A, B or C into certain categories, because your choices in a fictional game don’t speak for who you are in real life.

[buckybarnesbingo]

BBB Week 6 Roundup!

Little bit late, Mod Meg was on vacay over the weekend.

Title: Cute Quaterbacks Collaborator(s): Tori/samandbucky Link: AO3 Square: B4 - Sharing Clothes Rating: Teen Ship(s): Steve/Tony Major tags/warnings: AU, School, Fake Relationship, Protective!Bucky Summary: Steve and Bucky grew up as childhood best friends and are now roommates in college. Bucky dares Steve to bring a date to one of his upcoming football games after Steve suggests he could date anyone he wanted to. Enter Tony Stark. Word count: 1767

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Title: The Curse Collaborator(s): Tori/samandbucky Link: AO3 Square: K4 - Kiss Rating: Teen Ship(s): Bucky/Clint Major tags/warnings: Fluff, Established Relationship, Magic, Curses Summary: Clint gets hit during an alien attack with some dark magic, Bucky and Steve can't wake him, so they go to the only person they know who can undo the curse: Stephen Strange. Word count: 1364

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Title: A Regular Harry Houdini Collaborator(s): Bird Link: AO3 Square: K4 - Prisoners/Captives Together Rating: Teen Ship(s): Sam/Bucky Major tags/warnings: Minor Episode 5 Spoilers, Post-The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, Captured, First Kiss Summary: “You know, if Steve kissed me in the middle of an escape attempt, he would bring it up after,” Sam said. “I thought we weren’t talking about Steve,” Bucky grunted, closing his eyes. “I’m going to take a nap.” “I can’t believe you’re pretending to take a nap right now.” “I’m 106, Sam. I’m allowed to fall asleep whenever I want.” Word count: 1365

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Title: K5 Card B096 Soulbond Collaborator(s): Rufferto Link: Tumblr Square: K5 - High Fantasy, Curses, Shiny Sword Steve Rating: Teen Ship(s): Stucky Major tags/warnings: Fantasy Warrior Bucky, Curses, Art, Sword Steve Summary: When Bucky went off to war Steve was cursed into a sword. Bucky managed to find him because they share a bond but he's cursed. Bucky now carries Steve into battle wherever he goes looking for a way to have Steve at his side again. This was done on Hot Press Water Color Paper with Windsor & Newton and Arteza paints. I don’t much like the scan, there’s something always lost when a watercolor image is scanned but I will try some other time to get a better photo of it. Word count: none it is art.

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Title: Benevolent Overlord Collaborator(s): IndigoNight Link: AO3 Square: K1 - Bucky Bear Rating: Gen Ship(s): Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers Major tags/warnings: Fluff, PTSD, Codependency, Alpine the Cat Summary: “Hi,” Bucky says, wincing a little at how hoarse and rough his voice sounds from disuse. The kitten just hisses at him again, huge green eyes narrowed into slits. “Yeah, I get it,” he agrees with a grimace and a commiserating nod. Word count: 4921

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Title: I'm James Buchanan Barnes Collaborator(s): e_hytes Link: Tumblr Square: C2 - Art Style: Black and White Rating: Gen Ship(s): No pairing/ship Major tags/warnings: #buckybarnes #wintersoldier #jamesbuchananbarnes #mcu Summary: A drawing of Bucky/Winter Soldier black and white Word count: N/A

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Title: Someone Like You Collaborator(s): Nicnac Link: AO3 Square: C4 - Prison Rating: Mature Ship(s): Bucky/Reader Major tags/warnings: Enemies, Uneasy Allies, Hydra Agent Reader, Negotiations Summary: Taken from their SHIELD prison cell, the reader finds themself alone with The Winter Soldier negotiating for their life. Word count: 2693

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Title: Sambucky Incorrect Quotes Collaborator(s): snowstark Link: Tumblr Square: U2 - Partner-In-Crime Rating: Teen Ship(s): Sam/Bucky Major tags/warnings: Enemies to lovers vibe, Humour Summary: “Bucky, we tried things your way already.” “No we didn’t.” “I did it in my head and it didn’t work.” Word count: N/A

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Title: darling, you’re the one i want in paper rings Collaborator(s): cyanica Link: AO3 Square: C5 - teasing Rating: Gen Ship(s): steve/bucky Major tags/warnings: first time, demisexuality, period-typical homophobia, fluff, friends to lovers Summary: "Okay, I don't know why I’ve never – you know!” Bucky said after a moment, a soft laugh spilling from his lips – something so genuine and bashful, that Steve wasn’t so sure what to make of. “You're just – you're the only one I've ever had eyes for. You're the only one I’ve ever wanted.” Or, whatever deity had constructed the fragmented pieces of their souls together, they were made of the same smithereens, and Steve was sure he had known that as a child, holding Bucky’s slightly larger hand and accepting that they were of the same love, without even knowing what such a concept was. Word count: 1630

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Title: Unexpected Alliances - Chapter 4 Collaborator(s): PoliZ Link: AO3 Square: C5 - Lending a Hand Rating: Mature Ship(s): Stucky Major tags/warnings: Fantasy AU, enemies to friends/lovers, referenced/implied torture Summary: Buckthorn’s refusal to use his fae magic to support his captor’s cause has left him battered and broken; when he is given a dangerous shifter as his cellmate, they overcome their differences to become allies and perhaps something more. Chapter 4: Upon reaching the shifters’ camp, Buckthorn meets another of Stephen’s companions who seems to have a chip on his shoulder when it comes to fae folk. Word count: 1034

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Title: A Story Told in Flesh, Chapter 3: Together In Dreams Collaborator(s): ChrissiHR Link: AO3 Square: B2 - Rocket Racoon Rating: Explicit Ship(s): Bucky x Darcy x Steve Major tags/warnings: Big Swingin’ Dick!Steve, smut, nsfw, dream sex, sex positive Summary: Bucky and Darcy get massages and discuss Aesir medical treatments; Darcy has an erotic dream about Bucky & Steve. Word count: 1270

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Title: Written In The Scars (On My Heart) Collaborator(s): IndigoNight Link: AO3 Square: K5 - Just Do It Rating: Explicit Ship(s): Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes Major tags/warnings: Past Rape/Non-con, In Heat (but not A/B/O) Masturbation, Sex Toys, Mildly Dubious Consent, Body Worship, Self Body Worship, Rimming, Fuck Or Die (sort of), Porn with Feelings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, PTSD, Inability to Orgasm, Body Image, Reference to Past Medical Experimentation, Self-Lubrication, Touch-Starved, Touch-Averse Summary: He swallows hard, struggling with himself one last time and losing. “I need your help,” he manages to whisper, voice cracking. The air in the room immediately changes. The wound up tension drains out of Steve, his posture and voice going soft. “Sure, Buck,” he says, cautiously moving back toward him. Bucky can’t move, his arms locked tight around his knees, and he can’t lift his gaze higher than Steve’s knees either. Steve pauses when he’s still a few feet away, squatting down and angling his head in an effort to see Bucky’s face through the curtain of his hair. “Anything. What do you need?” It’s everything Bucky can do to hold still, every cell in his body vibrating with the need to throw himself into Steve’s arms. He opens his mouth, but his throat sticks and he has to swallow again before he can force the words out. Slowly, by sheer force of will, he drags his gaze up to meet Steve’s eyes. “I need you to fuck me.” Word count: 41k

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Title: Acceptance is the first part of Healing Collaborator(s): Laevateinn Link: AO3 Square: C4 - Denial Rating: Teen Ship(s): N/A Major tags/warnings: 1e3 : Power Broker, TFATWS coda, TW for : implied sexual abuse/assault, dissociation, PTSD, flashbacks, Angst, hopeful(ish) ending Summary: "You good ?" Wilson asks him, after he fought against eight men. "You okay ?" Wilson asks him, when they get to Sharon’s house. "You hurt ?" Wilson asks him, when they get out of the car. Yes, Wilson. All good. Now if the guy could shut up and carry on, that'd be great. Why would he be "not fine" anyway ? It's not as if anything that happened that day hasn't happened before. Word count: 906

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Title: The Maze Stumbler (Moodboard) Collaborator(s): Turtles Link: Tumblr Square: B3 - Labyrinth Rating: Teen Ship(s): Darcy Lewis & Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Major tags/warnings: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Thor, Cocktail, Labyrinth Summary: Something, something, Thor spikes the punch at the party and they all decide to re enact the Maze Runner… or something like that. Sam and Bucky wake up in the middle of a maze, nothing but Darcy’s voice in their ear giving them directions and critiquing their methodology Word count: N/A

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Title: The Maze Stumbler (Fic) Collaborator(s): Turtles Link: AO3 Square: C1 - Stranded Rating: Teen Ship(s): Darcy Lewis & Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Major tags/warnings: Thor's Asgardian Booze, a labyrinth, Dubious Timeline, Everybody Lives, Crack Summary: Don’t drink Thor’s Asgardian booze. Ever. Word count: 1657

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Title: 5 Times Steve Received Plums from Natasha or Sam and the 1 Time Steve Realized the Plums weren’t from Them Collaborator(s): Girl_Back_There Link: AO3 Square: K5 - Bucky/Steve Rating: Teen Ship(s): Bucky/Steve Major tags/warnings: 5 + 1, Bucky and his Plums, Angst and Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug Summary: Steve keeps finding plums in his hotel rooms or his bag. He thinks it is Natasha or Sam trying to be a good friend by making sure he is eating and keeping up his energy in the search for Bucky. Each plum he finds reminds him of Bucky growing up in pre-WWII New York. The times they would give each other a plum as a way of saying “I’m sorry” or “I love you.” Word count: 2998

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Title: Faith and Desire and the Swing of Your Hips Collaborator(s): IndigoNight Link: AO3 Square: U2 - French Kiss Rating: Explicit Ship(s): Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes Major tags/warnings: Crossdressing, Nonbinary Steve Rogers, Oral Sex, Body Dysphoria, Gender Exploration, Supportive Flirting Summary: “You look gorgeous, doll,” he drawls, dragging up as much of old Brooklyn as he can to infuse into the words. Steve startles, even though the doorway and Bucky in it are clearly reflected behind him in the mirror. Steve’s eyes flick to him and away again, his face going pink from the tips of his ears and spreading all the way down to his chest. He fidgets with his skirt, hands smoothing over the folds of it self consciously. “It looks a little silly,” he mutters, chewing on his already chapped lower lip. Word count: 5470

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Title: Stay Collaborator(s): Bird/plutosrose Link: AO3 Square: C3 - Free Square Rating: Explicit Ship(s): Sam/Bucky Major tags/warnings: Post-Canon, First Time Summary: “So, are you keeping the outfit?” Word count: 1919

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Title: It's Not a Miracle You Need Collaborator(s): UisceOneLove Link: AO3 Square: Y3 - At a Crossroads Rating: Teen Ship(s): James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers Major tags/warnings: Post-Endgame, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending Summary: Sitting out on the dock of Tony's lakehouse while the others slept, Steve thought about where he was expected to go from here. It's a good thing Bucky's around to help him see where that can be. Word count: 1584

[everybodyscupoftea]

if you don’t want to get hit, stay off the tracks

frat jj x reader

i have several requests and i promise i’m working on them. so, for all you anons who left them, i’m not ignoring them! but i’ve been watching the playoffs and i couldn’t stop thinking about this.

this is dedicated to every girl out there who’s been on the receiving end of misogyny and gatekeeping as a sports fan :)

(warnings: swearing, misogyny, not proofread even a little)

You were a huge sports fan in general. Football, college baseball, basketball, and especially hockey. Growing up in North Carolina meant you were a Carolina Hurricanes fan. You remembered watching them win the cup in ‘06 and then all of the struggles since.

When they finally found success again, you were ecstatic. Hockey was way more fun to watch when you could scream in happiness as opposed to frustration. JJ was a Stars fan, and you didn’t understand it, but you didn’t hate the Stars and they rarely played your team so you didn’t really care.

Regular season was pretty chill, and you didn’t quite catch every game, but you watched as many as possible. Some of JJ’s frat brothers had a fantasy league, and after about two weeks of bothering the GM, they let you join. It was mostly as a joke for them, but you knew your shit and wiped the floor with some of them. It was fun scamming them, and JJ found great joy in taking the piss out of the sore losers.

Playoffs, though, were a whole different beast. Most of the season you didn’t really chirp their favorite teams. Except for the one guy who liked the Red Wings, but he took it well. Otherwise, you settled for destroying them in fantasy.

Some of the guys made brackets and taped them to one of the walls, and they let you join, this time definitely not underestimating you. The TV they had in the house was so much bigger than yours, and you spent a lot of time there to use it for games.

One of the boys complained once and you looked him right in the eye and said, “Don’t think I didn’t notice you take a picture of my bracket and copy it exactly for yours.” He kept his mouth shut after that. 

Essentially, you were one of the boys. You chipped in on the beer and snacks fund, screamed at the TV with them, and argued strategy with some of them who mistakenly thought they knew more than you. It was therapeutic, especially finally having some Canes fans to celebrate with. One of the boys in the house, Drew, was also a diehard Canes fan, and you frequently messaged him on Instagram to talk shit about whoever they were playing.

The second round started around the same time of finals, but you let the excitement from a first round sweep carry you through all-nighters and long study group sessions. The weekend after your last final, you finally made the trip to the house to watch game three with the rest of the guys.

You were a little grumpy from lack of sleep, but pumped because of the two-game series lead the Canes had. Drew gave you a fist bump when you got to the house, already wearing his Martinook jersey and you held up your Williams one with a huge grin.

JJ took you upstairs to his room to “catch up” for the first time in over a week, but you made sure to keep it on time, you didn’t want to miss puck drop. He complained a little bit, but went to grab the two of you some beers while you cleaned up.

One of the guys there for the game was a fan of the opposing team, and he gave you a look when you and JJ walked down from his room, you wearing your jersey, already a beer and a half in. You took one look at his jersey and said, “Oh, hope you’re ready for an ass-whooping.”

“Fuck yeah,” Drew crowed from the couch, and the other boy rolled his eyes and made a comment under his breath that you couldn’t hear, but you didn’t care. You pulled JJ to sit near Drew and he laughed, when you sat on the floor between his legs, leaning back against the couch.

“You don’t want to sit on the couch?” he asked.

“Nah, I sat on the floor most of the first round, so I don’t want to change things up and jinx it.”

JJ shrugged as you got hold of the remote and turned the volume up for the announcement of the starting lineup. The game started and you were immediately chirping the other boy. Drew kept popping open beers for you and the more you drank, the more targeted they became.

“Damn, y’all got a goalie out there or did you just sign swiss cheese.”

Or, “God, I could do a better job than these forwards, can’t score to save their lives.”

For the most part everyone was laughing along. You were reveling in the laughs, not really paying much attention to the guy you were talking to, until he snapped. After your comment about the GM being the worst in the league, he turned to say, “Pipe down, bitch, you barely know what you’re talking about anyway.”

The room went silent, and you blinked a few times in shock. JJ’s legs tensed, and you put your hand on one of them to keep him from saying anything. You looked at him for a few seconds before snapping, “Didn’t I kick your ass both weeks in fantasy. The only thing worse than your fantasy team is the one whose jersey you’re wearing.”

His cheeks went red at the oooh’s coming from the other boys in the room. JJ relaxed under your hand and put one of his hands in your hair, scratching your scalp lightly to calm you down a little. You thought that was it, but the boy just had to have the last word, “Bet you got someone to draft for you, no way a girl knows that much about hockey.”

You stood, albeit, a little shakily, and glared at him. JJ’s hand fisted the back of your jersey, whether to make sure you didn’t fall or to make sure you didn’t attack him, you weren’t sure. You glared at the guy and reached behind you without looking, “Babe, give me a few of your rings so when I beat the fuck outta this guy, he’ll have a reminder to show me some damn respect.”

Someone in the room coughed, probably trying to hold in a laugh, and Drew snorted, “I say she does it.”

“Take a lap,” JJ warned the guy in a low voice and you crossed your arms.

“Pussy whipped,” the guy mumbled under his breath and that time JJ stood.

“Take a fucking lap, I won’t say it again.”

The boy stood and left the room, slamming the front door behind him, as the buzzer signaling the end of the second period went off. You watched the Canes skate off the ice, heart pounding pretty hard.

“Fuck,” you muttered, seeing the score, “I missed a goal. Can someone rewind?”

All the tension drained out of the room as everyone laughed. Drew handed you a beer and you clinked it with his before sitting back down. JJ placed a hand on your shoulder and you looked up at him. He smiled softly, “You good?”

“Yeah, I think so. Not the first time I’ve heard that shit.”

“I know, but this should be a safe space for you.”

You smiled, “You are pussy whipped.”

JJ laughed, “Yeah, yeah, I just love you, okay?”

“I love you too,” you told him, pressing a kiss to the inside of his knee.

Drew cleared his throat, “Thought I should let you know, you missed the goal.”

“Oh, fuck, can you rewind it again?”

***

tagging: @girlsru1eboysdroo1​ @socialwriter​ @diverdcwn​ @peypip​ @stfukie​

[winchestress]

luca marinelli characters ranked by how attractive I find them

Lasciati Andare (Ettore)

My attraction to Luca was really threatened here. This is what I see every day when I go outside in my small Russian city and I did NOT need a reminder. That knockoff adidas and that hairstyle that’s mostly fringe than anything else. Ugh.

La Solitudine Dei Numeri Primi (Mattia)

Two very different looks that aren’t half bad, really, but his overall vibe in this movie is the opposite of what can cause any type of attraction, so I just can’t separate it from his look.

La Grande Bellezza (Andrea)

Longer hair is a Go. Longer beard is a No. Also, the reasoning applied to Mattia works here.

Non Essere Cattivo (Cesare)

90s cocaine chic is definitely a Look but imma pass.

Lo Chiamavano Jeeg Robot (Zingaro)

Luca here hot, in a trashy kind of way. There’s a reason this look is so often brought up in joenicky fics as Joe’s sex fantasy. That karaoke scene is 11/10. If he washed his hair in the rest of the movie this look would rank higher. 

Die Pfeiler Der Macht (Mickey)

The only time he has a small amount of curl in his hair and it works. Also victorian period clothes just look so flattering I can’t help but simp a little.

Fabrizio de André - Principe Libero

I am Weak for people with guitars singing sensual songs smoking cigarettes moodily, so I gobbled this movie UP. His hair reminded me a bit too much of my emo phase, so that was the only letdown.

Il Padre d’Italia (Paolo)

Sof unassuming Boyfriend look. I would pass him by on the street if I ever saw him looking like that, but it’s nice. 

The Old Guard (Nicky)

Visually looks kind of similar to Paolo in its absolute everyday-ness but the biggest difference is that Nicky is badass/intense and it shows.

Trust (Primo)

Don’t judge. I also thought this wouldn’t work. But then I watched episode 3 “La Dolce Vita” dir. Danny Boyle and I was like... oh no.

Una Questione Privata (Milton)

A good preppy look can go a long way.

Slam (Valerio)

This bitch is annoying but gorgeous. Also, earrings.

Il mondo fino in fondo (Loris)

His character is a tragically straight himbo who cares about football more than about his pregnant wife, but my god, he looks amazing.

Waves (Gabriele)

Let Luca wear his earrings in movies 2k20. Hot pirate look that rivaled the gorgeous sights of Greek islands.

Ricordi? (Lui)

Everything works here. Everything. ESPECIALLY the Depressed Thot vibe.

Martin Eden

There is a reason every movie critic became a Luca stan after this movie. How was he described? “For 2 hours, he’s the most beautiful man in cinema”? Yeah.

Tutti i Santi Giorni (Guido)

This is Peak Luca, dont @ me. I have a Very specific taste men and this look is everything I would want if I wanted a boyfriend (I rarely do). Scruff, glasses, longer hair? Soft cardigans and oversized jackets?? Adorably awkward??? I am READY to have his babies, and I am childfree. 

[fanfics4all]

Painless

Request: Yes / No 

Requests are closed <3 Have a nice day/night

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Word count: 3200

Warnings: SCHOOL BOMBING, CURSING, it’s criminal minds so read at your own risk! 

Y/N: Your Name 

PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORK, I WORK HARD ON MY FICS AND IT’S NOT COOL TO STEAL SOMEONE ELSE’S WORK! 

If you want to be on the tag list for anything (My series fics, specific character fics, or just all of them) All you have to do is send me an ask and I will add you! 

Masterlist 

(Not my photo, credit to whoever made it!)

Another day at work. Another day of someone dead. I thought as I walked into the office. I saw everyone was already in the round table room and sighed. Another case. I put my stuff down at my desk and walked into the room. I took my seat next to my boyfriend Spencer and gave a smile at everyone. 

“Does anyone remember this picture?” Garcia asked, bringing up a picture of a man and a girl looking distressed. 

“Hotch and I were there. That’s Principal Doug Gavens. We had to drag him to safety.” Rossi said, making everyone look at him. 

“High school bombing in Boise, right?” Emily asked. 

“School shooter and school bomber.” JJ said and it triggered my memory. 

“A kid named Randy Slade shot three students and then set off an I.E.D. in the cafeteria via cell phone, killing himself and thirteen kids total, but not before posting all his plans online.” I said and Garcia nodded. 

“It was one of those “Where were you?” events. My whole campus was glued to the T.V..” JJ said. 

“Last night, Principal Givens was killed by a bomb modeled exactly like the old one.” Garcia said. 

“It feels like the unsub wants to attack the man who kept the school together after the bombing. It’s a pretty symbolic target.” Morgan said. 

“And this week is the tenth anniversary of the massacre.” Hotch said. 

“And today is the first day of a four day event to commemorate the bombing at the school.” Garcia said. 

“Except commemorating it isn’t enough for this unsub.” Emily said. 

“No. He wants to relive it.” Hotch said. We gathered our things and got on the plane. We were all sitting down and going over the case files. 

“Perpetrators of school violence are often sophisticated with their weapons. Randy Slade carried his bomb in his backpack. This guy hid his in Givens’ clock radio.” Spencer said. 

“Yeah, and progressive. Each one tries to top the body count of the one previous.”  

“And they’re loners by default, not by choice. They try to join various social groups, but they get shut out.” JJ said. 

“Randy Slade wasn’t a loner at all.” Hotch said. 

“The family cooperated fully with us. He was a high-functioning psychopath, straight-A student, varsity wrestler, lots of girlfriends.” Rossi said. 

“With an above-average intelligence that made him incredibly resourceful. His explosive of choice was Semtex.” I said looking at the files. 

“It’s found at demolition sites, but it’s held under lock and key.” Spencer said. 

“Which made us consider the possibility of a partner. Never found one.” Rossi said. 

“Slade was too much of a narcissist to share credit. But he was also an impulsive teen, which is what bothers me about this unsub.” Hotch said. 

“His sense of control?” Emily asked. 

“And the end game that he’s working toward.” Hotch answered with a nod. 

“Slade’s pathology revolved around the big kill. This unsub could have done the same if he’d waited for the candlelight vigil.” Hotch added. 

“Which means there’s no blaze of glory fantasy here. This unsub has more bombs made, and he’s savoring the anticipation of his next attack.” Rossi said. After we talked everyone moved to their own spots to think and relax before we had the hard work to do. I sat next to Spencer and smiled at him. 

“This poor town.” I said and he sighed. 

“I know, but the odds are against them in this situation.” He said and I nodded. 

“I know, but that doesn’t mean it sucks any less.” I said and he nodded. 

“It’s a hard thing to deal with.” He said. 

“Yeah…” I sighed. We tried to keep our minds on things that would help us, instead of how much people were hurting right now. 

As soon as we landed we dropped our stuff off at our hotel then split up. Hotch and Rossi went to the station with Emily and Morgan. Spencer, JJ and I went to the crime scene. We walked inside and it was a mess, not shocking though considering what happened. 

“Okay, so the unsub has to be tied to the school somehow, right?” JJ asked. 

“Current student, alumni, family member who lost someone…” I listed off. 

“It could be Slade groupies celebrating his hero. He taped nails to the exterior of the bomb, specifically to rip open flesh. That’s a sadistic detail of Slade’s the unsub copied.” Spencer said. 

“Except he tricked Givens into blowing himself up. A groupie probably wouldn’t show that much self-control.” JJ said. 

“But someone with an ax to grind against the principal would. Maybe he’s a surrogate for the tomenters in high school he can’t punish.” Spencer said. 

“Who were yours?” He asked us. 

“I don’t even remember.” JJ answered. 

“You don’t even remember? Wait, were you one of those mean girls?” Spencer questioned. 

“No.” JJ said. 

“Valedictorian, soccer scholarship, corn-fed, but still a size zero. I think that you might have been a mean girl.” Spencer said. 

“Spence.” I said. 

“I was actually one of the nice girls, even to guys like you.” JJ answered and I shook my head. There was no stopping this now. 

“Guys like me? I’ll have you know that my social standing increased once I started winning at basketball.” Spencer said, I always forget that he coached basketball. 

“Oh yeah? You played basketball?” JJ asked. 

“Actually he coached it.” I answered. 

“You coached it?” She asked. 

“Yeah, I broke down the opposing team’s shooting strategy.” He said. 

“Is that why Morgan kicked you two out of the pool last week?” She asked. 

“Yeah, it took him three rounds to realize we were hustling him.” I answered with a laugh. 

“Huh.” She said and we went back to looking at the crime scene. As soon as we were done looking we got a call about another murder. So we made our way there. The three of us looked around and JJ decided to call Hotch and tell him.

“You’re on speaker JJ.” Hotch answered. 

“So, we might have another one.” She said. 

“Might?” He asked. 

“One of the North Valley alumni was killed in her motel room.” She answered. 

“No bomb or gun this time. Looks like he used his bare hands.” I added. 

“You got a name?” Hotch asked. 

“Chelsea Grant.” Spencer answered. 

The next day Spencer and I returned to the crime scene with Hotch. It was good to come back and look at it with fresh eyes. 

“The unsub crushed Chelsea’s throat so she couldn’t scream, then he pulverized her ribs, sending fragments of bone into her heart.” Spencer said. 

“Principal Givens was high-profile. Chelsea wasn’t. Right now the only thing connecting them is they’re both on the kill list.” Hotch said. 

“A list that Brandon kept secret for ten years, but he was in custody when this happened. So the question is, how did the unsub get the exact same list?” I asked. 

“Well, we ruled out a partner, but not conclusively.” Hotch said. 

“Slade made every part of his plan public. It doesn’t make sense that he would hide a partner.” Spencer said. 

“He didn’t want to share the credit. And this weekend is the partner’s best chance to claim it.” Hotch said. 

“Let’s go back to the station, we have a profile to deliver.” He said and we followed him. 

When we got back to the station we gathered everyone up and we were ready to deliver the profile. 

“Partners of dominant psychopaths are usually submissive, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t be intelligent or that they’re physically weak.” Hotch said. 

“This unsub laid low after the bombing and successfully evaded police and FBI. That took cunning and patience, which he’s exhibiting now with his current murders.” Morgan said. 

“We think he fits the loner profile Slade debunked. He grew up in an abusive home, which kept him from forming the normal social bonds in high school.” JJ said. 

“We interviewed all the outcasts from back then. How did this guy slip through?” Chief Cole asked. 

“Even outcasts eventually form friendships. But this unsub was the outcast the outcasts rejected.” Spencer said. 

“Exactly, he won’t stand out in any capacity, and as a matter of fact, most of his fellow students probably won’t even remember graduating with him.” I said. 

“And that invisibility is what made him attractive to Slade. This partner wouldn’t steal the spotlight.” Rossi said. 

“Slade targeted the cafeteria because most of the names on his list ate there together during fifth period.” Spencer said. 

“So his hatred festered when the names on the list emerged from the cafeteria as media heroes. And now he wants to finish the job that Randy started.” Morgan said. 

“Emotionally, this weekend is more a high school reunion to him than a memorial. We go to reunions to show who we grew up to be. Often that means changing everything about who we were.” Rossi said. 

“Consciously or not, Randy Slade revealed clues as to his partner’s identity when he detonated his bomb. Agent Prentiss will be conducting cognitive interviews to see what the survivors might remember.” Hotch said. We answered a few questions the cops had then went on to try and work out who this guy could be. Emily was with the survivors now working on them. 

“So, as you can see from your board there, this kill list is weirdly similar to high school. 

“Group on is like the popular kids, prom court, football team, dean’s list. The Heathers, if you will.” Garcia said. 

“Kids in Slade’s social circle.” Hotch said. 

“What about number two?” JJ asked. 

“Uh, mmhmm, that would be the kids from the other side of the tracks, 180-degree difference, kids this close to getting kicked out, Stoners, burnouts, mental cases. Chelsea Grant is on this list.” Garcia said. 

“Maybe Slade targeted them because they disgusted him?” JJ asked while Spencer’s phone was ringing. We have been doing a lot of that since we got here. 

“But they didn’t threaten Slade’s sense of superiority. He wouldn’t have even cared about them.” Hotch said as we ignored Spencer’s phone. 

“So maybe the partner put them on the list. They’d be closer to his social status than Slade’s.” I said as Spencer’s phone stopped ringing. 

“Why would the-” Spencer was cut off by his phone ringing again. 

“I’m so sorry.” He said, taking his phone out and hung up. 

“Why would the unsub list kids that he fit in with?” Spencer asked, putting his phone away again. 

“Apparently that’s how this clique worked. The kids in it were meaner to each other than kids on the outside. Garcia, separate out all the kids who got into trouble regularly. Then eliminate the names that the partner put on the list. Now, who’s left that came to the memorial?” Hotch asked. 

“Right. Whoever made the list wouldn’t put their name on it. Uh… sir, I think- I think I’ve got him. His name is Lewis Ramsey.” Garcia said. 

“Where is he?” Hotch asked. 

“Uhh… According to his cell phone he’s at a local bar.” She answered. 

“Send it to Morgan’s phone.” Hotch ordered and called him. Morgan brought him in and him and Hotch started interviewing him. Once they were done they told the rest of us. 

“You buy it?” Emily asked. 

“He fits the profile, and the evidence points to him, but he seems sincere.” Hotch said. 

“He’s not the unsub. He was the partner, but look at how Slade added “All the losers in this Godforsaken school.” This capitalization isn’t an accident. Look.” Spencer said and wrote it on the white board. 

“L-S-R, Lewis Stuart Ramsey.” He said. 

“So Slade named his own partner.” I said. 

“Ironically, Lewis’ marijuana addiction saved his life.” He said with a nod. 

“Well, that puts us back to our original problem. If the unsub isn’t the partner, how did he get his hands on a list that Slade and Lewis kept to themselves?” I asked. 

“The only answer is that part of the profile is wrong. The unsub’s vendetta has nothing to do with the list. Did you get anything from Jerry Holtz?” Hotch asked Emily. 

“Only that he mixed up the cell phones that Slade used. It felt like he was making the story up, but I only had a hunch.” Emily said. 

“We need to find him now. There’s a connection to the victimology that we’re missing. Whatever he’s holding back might be the key.” Hotch said. We found Jerry, but he was dead. He was killed at the school. We made our way there and Emily met us there. 

“Jerry Holtz? How long?” She asked. 

“Less than an hour. Security guard heard the commotion, but the unsub was already gone.” JJ answered. 

“The only people who knew we were doing the cognitive interviews were the other survivors. The unsub must be part of that group.” Emily said. 

“Well, we don’t know that for a fact. He could have been lying in wait.” I said. 

“Look, Hotch wants me to go through the victims’ lives and find the overlaps. We can compare their histories with the unsub’s.” JJ said. 

“What else do we have to go on?” Emily asked, looking at Spencer and I. 

“Spence said the unsub would have broken his hand beating Chelsea to death. Did you notice anyone with a cast on their hand, someone who seemed hurt?” JJ asked. 

“No.” Emily shook her head. 

“I might know why.” Spencer said and we all looked at him. 

“This unsub doesn’t feel pain.” He said. 

“You mean he has pain asymbolia?” I asked and he nodded.

“We need to get back to the station. Spencer told them about his theorie and no one understood what he was saying.  

“In english for the other people in the room.” Morgan asked. 

“There’s a medical condition called pain asymbolia, where patients register harmful stimuli without being bothered by it. They’ve been documented holding their hand over an open flame because their brain doesn’t send pain signals to the central nervous system.” Spencer explained. 

“Sounds pretty rare. You sure the unsub has it?” Rossi asked. 

“The crime scenes prove it. Once Spencer said it, everything clicked. He displayed an unusual level of savagery towards his victims. And consider this, he smashed through a glass display case, but there were no cuts on Jerry. That means he most likely punched through it as a show of force.” I said. 

“Now, the only way the human body could withstand that level of pain is if he couldn’t feel it at all.” Spencer added. 

“It must take a major toll on someone’s emotional development.” Rossi said and Spencer’s phone rang… again. 

“A significant contributor to our sense of empathy is the way we personally experience pain.” Morgan said and Spencer silenced his phone again. 

“And the unsub didn’t develop his sense of empathy because it was cut off. Does every person with Asymbolia have this?” Hotch asked. 

“Actually, most feel empathy just fine, which makes me think the rest of our profile is still accurate. Loner, invisible, outcast, boiling rage- Son of a bitch!” Spencer said, pulling out his ringing cell phone and answered it. I notice Morgan trying to hide a smirk. 

“Hi! This is Dr. Spencer Reid. I actually can come to the phone right now with a very special message that your mother is-” 

“Reid.” Hotch cut him off and he hung up. 

“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I don’t know what got into me. Where were we?” He asked, putting his phone away. 

“I’m going to have Garcia check medical records. Uh, what causes Asymbolia?” Hotch asked. 

“Ssss- Severe trauma produces lesions on the insular cortex, usually after a stroke but this unsub’s so young, it’s most likely caused by an external factor.” Spencer said looking at Morgan the whole time. 

“Like a bomb going off next to him?” Rossi asked. 

“Yeah, like a bomb going off next to him.” He repeated at Morgan. Morgan just smirked and Hotch walked off to talk to Garcia. 

“I will crush you.” Spencer whispered. 

“What?” Morgan asked. 

“What?” Spencer repeated and walked off. I looked at Rossi and shook my head with a smirk. 

“You two are seriously pranking each other while on a case?” I asked and Morgan just smiled. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He said and I shook my head again. I swear these two… 

JJ and Emily came by a little later with some new information. JJ was rearranging some pictures on the board. We looked on with confusion. 

“Recognize the top ten?” JJ asked. 

“No.” Hotch answered. 

“They were the students that went in front of the cameras after the bombing.” She answered. 

“I thought all the surviving students were interviewed?” I asked.

“After the initial aftermath, yes, but these are the kids that went on talk shows, traveled to other schools. My guess is that they didn’t self-select who made the cut.” JJ said. 

“Principal Givens did.” Hotch said. 

“That’s why the unsub killed him first. He was an outcast who wanted to fit in. Being a survivor should have been his golden ticket.” She said. 

“But he was excluded again, and that’s why he’s killing them.” I said. 

“Yeah. The rules of high school never changed, not even after a tragedy.” JJ said. Hotch’s phone rang and he put it on speaker. 

“Go ahead, Garcia.” He said. 

“Hey, listen up. I crossed-referenced student files with medical records. Now, there were six kids that were knocked unconscious in that blast, but only one fit the outcast profile. His name is Robert Adams, and he just used his credit card at a local restaurant, the address of which I just sent you right now.” She said. 

“I’m on my way.” Hotch said looking at us. Hotch gathered everyone up and JJ and I stayed back. When they came back Robert wasn’t with them. Hotch had to shoot him, there was no other way this was going to end. Once we got everything sorted we got on the plane to go home. I was sitting next to Spencer, who was resting his head on my shoulder while I read a book. We were sitting across from Morgan and Emily, Morgan was listening to music and Emily was reading a paper. He took his headphones off and we heard Spencer screaming from them. 

“Okay, kid, that was cute. But that’s all you got?” Morgan asked him, he was very clearly pretending to be asleep. Morgan’s cell ran and he answered it. 

“Hey baby girl-” He was cut off by Spencer screaming coming through his phone. Spencer had a smile on his face and Rossi held up a white napkin. 

“Uh-uh. Alright, Reid, it’s on. Just know that paybacks are a bitch.” Morgan said. Spencer just responded with snoring. I shook my head at the two of them. 

“You started this Morgan, it’s your own fault.” I said with a slight laugh. 

“Of course you’re taking his side, Y/N.” He rolled his eyes. 

“Well I am dating him, so yes I’m taking his side.” I said and Rossi chuckled. 

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[spidercakes]

Teacher tony and student peter. Peter’s flirting not so subtly and tony ignores it until peter shows up in a short skirt and he can’t take it anymore.

Yes!

All the warnings that are applicable to this are sort of implied by the prompt itself though no actual smut happens, its just implied. I may or may not write a part two with the actual smut!

*

Peter fucking Parker. Its not that Tony doesn’t like the kid, or that he’s not bright, or that he’s not stupid attractive considering he’s supposed to be an awkward teenager, its that Tony is his teacher and this kid has been making it increasingly difficult to ignore him. And its not like its Peter’s fault, so he’s got a crush on his teacher. He’s not the first but its Tony’s responsibility to not make a move. Not that he doesn’t want to, god he wants to with the kid sitting there in that fucking stupid short skirt of his that can’t possibly fit the school dress code.

He’s got his legs crossed and with one leg tucked over the other even more of his god damn leg is exposed and he’s insisted on putting his hand on his thigh, lightly running his fingers along it. Fuck, he’d like to run his fingers up Peter’s soft looking thighs, pushing that skirt up just a little further as Peter rides him, hands curled around his neck as he whimpers into Tony’s ear. He’d fuck him soft and slow, testing Peter’s patience as he gets more desperate and his fingers curl tighter into Tony’s hair while fucking begs for it in Tony’s ear.

He shakes his head a little, banishing the thoughts because Peter is his student and even if he wasn’t he’s still seventeen. Almost eighteen, Tony’s mind supplies him like reaching that age will somehow magically make him less off limits. Like he’ll suddenly grow an amount of maturity in the next two months that will make their relationship even remotely okay. It wouldn’t and he shouldn’t think of Peter this way at all. Or any other teen, not that he’s ever had this problem before. Sure kids these days are weirdly smart and politically aware with the side of the usual teenage dumbassery but attraction to them is something Tony has never had an issue with.

Then Peter fucking Parker came along and he has to look like that. Especially in that god damn skirt of his. And its red too, the shade Tony likes best and he figures Peter probably figured out that his favorite color is red. Not exactly hard when its one of the only colors he wears. Peter tends to prefer that soft shade of pink so Tony is sure this is on purpose. He’s never even seen Peter wear red before.

He turns resolutely away from him to look over the tests from the last class and he swears to fucking god the first one he picks up has got to be from the dumbest student in the class. He loves science, always has, and he gets that none of the students will be as good at it as him but fuck, on a multiple choice question he doesn’t expect the students to pick the only answer that’s obviously wrong either. He sighs and continues through the test, sure that the student picked the answer because he thought it was funny or something but it becomes clear pretty fast that the poor bastard took ‘if you don’t know go with c’ a little too close to heart.

The students in this class slowly trickle out, leaving their tests with him and he hopes they aren’t as fucking dumb as his last class. He should have taught art and history like Rogers, no chance of watching what he loves get butchered and art is impossible to fail. If people can paint a single black dot on a big ass canvas and call it art its not possible to fail the damn class. Science? You’re pretty much either right or wrong. He should have taught university level, at least he could trust that they’d know the basics well enough that he could be angry that they’re so dumb. In high school the problem is his teaching, apparently. Except the football players, they’re fucking hopeless regardless of the teacher.

It surprises him when Peter ends up there for the whole time period because he’s smart, far smarter than his peers and Tony knows he dumbs himself down in class. He knows too much about the concepts in ways that aren’t applicable to high school learning to not be dumbing himself down, so it usually results in him being done any and all tests first. So when he comes up to him with his test looking a little sheepish Tony knows something is up. Peter bites his lip and Tony’s attempts to have gotten the damn kid out of his head get thrown out the window instantly. Should have chosen something harder to focus on than science, that’s more than easy to him. Should have tried to figure out what the fuck the english department is doing.

“Um... I didn’t get the test done. Can I come back after school to finish it?” he asks.

Tony should say no, he would to any other student who asked. He goes to tell him no but that’s not what comes out. “Sure, Peter,” he says, ignoring the awkward pause between his words because his first instinct is to call Peter ‘baby’ and that’s fucking ridiculous. And wildly inappropriate.

Peter looks enthused as he drops his test on Tony’s desk. “Thanks, Mr. Stark!” he says happily, flouncing off towards the door.

“Can I do that?” someone else asks and Tony looks the kid over.

“No.”

“The fuck, how come Parker gets to come back?” he asks and Tony rolls his eyes.

“Because ‘Parker’ doesn’t regularly skip my class to go get high. Don’t look so surprised, absolutely none of you are good at covering up the smell and even less of you are smart enough to avoid walking past the giant ass windows that are right there,” he says, gesturing to the wall of windows to his right. “Seriously, at least be smart enough to avoid the windows of the class you’re supposed to be in.”

Peter snickers by the door looking amused and he knows he should tell Peter not to laugh but he can’t bring himself to do it. “You let Parker get away with everything,” the kid mumbles and Tony shrugs.

“Well, he’s got a ninety eight in this class and you know what your grade is,” he mumbles, causing Peter to snort and start laughing again. He gets a dirty look for it and Tony is gracious enough to let the mumbled swear words pass unnoticed mostly because he doesn’t really care. Instead he focuses on the way Peter looks at him as he slips out the door, smile on his face. God damn he needs to get over himself.

*

Peter’s behind his desk, legs spread a little and he can’t really see anything really but Tony’s got a pretty wild imagination and he’s happy he’s sitting behind a desk. Peter chews on his pen quietly, occasionally shooting Tony a look accompanied by a small smile before turning back to his test. He’s sure, positive, that Peter is doing this on purpose. Or he’s imagining the whole thing to suit his wants so he shakes his head a little, trying to focus on the tests he needs to mark and not the way Peter’s hand slips down and trails his fingers up the inside of his thigh. God, he can’t be that ignorant to his actions, right?

Either way Tony does his best to avoid looking at Peter for too long and Peter makes that a fucking hardship looking like that. But eventually, mercifully, Peter gets up, looking over his test answers for a moment before letting out a soft ‘oh’ and turning around to fix whatever it is he’s noticed. And instead of sitting back down like a normal fucking person he bends over, ass facing Tony and in that short little skirt of his Tony can see the red lace and that’s it, he fucking loses it, getting out of his seat and walking towards Peter before he can even form a conscious thought about it.

When Peter turns around Tony is right there already, pushing him onto the desk behind him. He runs one hand up Peter’s thigh, it feels as soft as it looks, and curls the other around his neck, bringing him in for a kiss. It occurs to him maybe too late to ask but Peter gives him an enthusiastic, if silent, yes in the form of wrapping his arms around Tony’s neck and curling his legs around his waist. Peter’s back arches into him and he lets out a soft moan into Tony’s mouth as Tony toys with the edge of his skirt.

Peter’s fingers make their way into his hair and Tony can’t help the small noise of pleasure he lets out because he’s imagined this a million times, the way Peter would curl his fingers into his hair and pull at it a little bit as he gets desperate, moans growing increasingly louder as Tony teases him. Not that he needs the fantasies now, Peter is clearly more than willing to make those late night fantasies a reality with the way he’s clinging to Tony’s body. But he has to pull away a little. Peter immediately lets out a whine at the loss, making Tony laugh softly before leaning back in and giving him a soft, slow kiss that has Peter all but melting in his grasp. Fuck he’s hot.

Doesn’t change the fact that they’re in a classroom though and Peter pouts at him when he pulls back again. “Mr. Stark,” he all but whines at him.

Tony pets Peter’s thighs lightly. “Baby, we’re in a classroom,” he points out.

“So?” Peter says, petulant.

He gestures to the big ass wall of windows that thankfully don’t face the street. The problem is self evident but it doesn’t seem to phase Peter any. “Your point?” he says and Tony really has no idea where he gets this stuff.

“My point is that I’m not looking to lose my job over witnesses, tempting as you are,” he murmurs, hands dropping down to Peter’s narrow waist. His skirt is hiked up even further and that mostly just tempts him more.

“Fine then,” Peter says, “I’m sure we can find somewhere in here with no windows.”

Yeah, a fucking janitor’s closet and that’s so not what he has in mind for this. “Baby, we can do better than a desk in a school,” he points out.

Peter still pouts at him though, “aw, I had a few fantasies about yours,” he says, leg around Tony’s waist hitching a bit higher. God damn Tony does too but it doesn’t change the window situation.

He leans in and kisses Peter again, “you know where I live, hmm?” he murmurs into his mouth. Benefit of the suburbs, he figures, is knowing your neighbors. Actually he fucking hates that, misses the anonymity of New York city, but right now it works in his favor because Peter nods. “Good. You’re gunna go home, tell your aunt you’re staying at Ned’s, and then you’re going to come over to my place and I’m going to show you what happens when you fucking tease me for months. Fucking chewing on the end of your pen all the damn time, always touching your damn thighs, your damn skirt, those panties,” Tony shakes his head as he looks Peter over. “Wanted to bend you over my desk so many god damn times.”

Peter slips off the desk, making use of what little space was between them as he presses up flush against Tony’s body. “M’so not stopping you from doing that, Mr. Stark,” he says, fingers toying with his hair. “I thought you didn’t want me.”

Tony snorts, “baby, I’ve wanted you since the beginning of the year when you walked in wearing those thigh highs,” he says honestly. Tony had walked straight into a fucking door after witnessing that and he spilt hot coffee all down his shirt. Pretty good punishment for eyeing up a teenager, he’d figured.

Peter leans up and kisses him, guiding one of Tony’s hands to his ass and that’s so hot. If there’s anything Tony likes in a partner its that they know what they like and they aren’t afraid to ask for it with or without words. He squeezes Peter’s ass a little, delighting in the soft moan Peter lets out as he presses himself harder into Tony’s body. “How do I know you won’t back out on me, hmm? You’ve been so good all year. Too good,” Peter says, pouting.

“Already kissed you, baby, can’t come back from that. And god I have to have more of you.” He can’t just leave it like this, walk away from Peter like nothing ever happened when he knows it did, knows Peter wants more. Fuck, that’s way too good to pass up.

This seems to satisfy Peter enough because he grins. “I could probably get May to let me spend the whole weekend at Ned’s,” he says and damn if that’s not what Tony wants to hear.

“I’ll take you for as long as I can get you, baby. And bring those thigh highs too,” he adds.