#I do not want them to die I just want them to suffer for a little bit

[deramin2]

My most shit-post-but-serious political opinion is that any politician from the city to national level should be required to play 16 hours of literally any city builder game before they get to make judgements about how to run society.

Personally I think resource management city builders that require more logistics than moving money around are better preparation, but literally any simulation of people interacting with social services over time will do. They are all an interactive and playful way to experience how taking care of people benefits you as grand overlord, and makes more money/resources than leaving poor people to suffer.

It's basically impossible to make a city builder which includes any mechanics for food, shelter, education, healthcare, and mass transit that doesn't show that just fucking providing those things makes the entire society function better and be wealthier.

I'm assuming in this framework that the biggest impact would be on people who don't understand that caring for people as human beings is a moral goal for society in itself. I want this to drill into the heads of the die-hard capitalists who only view people as money that it's still just fucking cheaper to house people than to jail them. That free healthcare is fundamentally cheaper than letting people deteriorate and die. If they can't muster up empathy, maybe statistics would work.

I'm so sick of society being such a dysfunctional nightmare because the people in charge lack even a basic over-simplified concept of how societies and "benefit programs" function. Force them to confront it in any way.

obsessed with how fixable society is, on a structural level.

obsessed with how all you need to do is throw money at public education and eliminate most standardized testing and you will start getting smarter, more engaged, kinder adults. obsessed with how giving people safe housing, reliable access to good food, and decent wages dramatically reduces drug overdoses and gun violence. obsessed with how much people actually want to get together and fix infrastructure, invent new ways of helping each other, and create global ways of living sustainably once you give them livable pay to do so. obsessed with how tracking diseases, developing medicines, and improving public health becomes so much easier when you just make healthcare free at point of use.

obsessed with how easy it all becomes, if we can just figure out how to wrench the wealth out of the hands of the hoarders.

[keferon]

I'm just thinking in idw where somehow both Blurr and Starscream somehow survived (though starscream did die at the end but that doesn't matter) the both of them just meet up one day and just sit in some back ally both absolutely flabbergasted that both of them manege to survive all the way to the end and got what they both wanted without dying. Like:

Starscream: "This is too good to be true,"

Blurr: "Absolutely, I bet you when this is over we're both gonna die the most horrible and gruesome deaths we'll ever experience"

Starscream: "That much is obvious, but, like, I didn't even know this was available to us, like getting all the way to the end. Heck you usually die all the way back on earth and I usually just get to be on cybertron a couple of month before dying"

Blurr: "I know right? How funny would it be if I survived longer than you this time?"

Starscream, pulling a flask and taking a swing: "Primus this is so gonna happen, I can feel it"

Blurr, taking the flask from Starscream and taking a swing as well: "If that happens I'm skipping your funeral, I've already been to the last one"

Starscream: "Bitch"

At the start of the war

Blurr: The fuck you're doing here

Starscream: I was sent to convert you into a Decepticon

Blurr: HA! I'm gonna be no use for you dude.

Starscream: Primus knows you live like fifty cycles on average.

Blurr: Yeah yeah and you have to suffer without my company~

Starscream: oh fuck you.

Blurr:........so how is your boss this time?

Starscream: Idealistic. Full of promises as usual. Wasn't caught sniffing drugs. The temper is longer than your average lifespan

Blurr: Oh fuck you.

One war later

Blurr: Yo

Starscream: YOU ALIVE????????

Blurr: Is that joy I hear?~

Starscream: HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE???

Blurr, leaning closer and whispering: I have no fucking idea

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

the thing about Lucanis and Spite is like. neither of them actually wanted to be there. and that is both how they were able to survive the melding and why they resent each other so much. Lucanis' banter about the Ossuary where he says to survive it he "Shut down completely. Think nothing. Feel nothing. Except what you need to escape." And when asked what's left he says "If you're lucky? Revenge. And bad dreams." like. he always had this core of his own personal spite down in him (not doing crow jobs the easy way, ignoring Caterina's summons, not embracing his future as a potential first talon, to "live truly is to live fully" but he HASN'T been allowed to and resents it, etc etc etc) but in the Ossuary he really hollows himself out into the perfect vessel, empties himself of everything but wanting to survive anyway. and "no one was in the Ossuary by choice, not even the demons" so of course he and Spite can agree on this One Thing. they make their deal that they're gonna make it through just because everyone else there is waiting for them to die, and of course they're not gonna just give them what they want. even if they're fighting each other the whole time (hence Lucanis being used to Spite 'hitting' him etc when he doesn't get what he wants), they still have this united purpose Every Day about getting through it. like it's utterly crucial that for both to survive at all the demon had to be something that wanted to defy what the venatori wanted from it.

and this is also why their relationship falls apart once they do escape, because without something else present to rail against every day, they have to turn on each other. and of course it is actually an absolutely miserable situation for both of them to be in--Lucanis is living the nightmare of his body being puppetted around without his consent, just like the blood magic he already had to endure under Zara, and can't ever be alone again even in his own mind. Spite is trapped in a world that no longer responds to his shaping, lacks the autonomy of a truly possessed host body, and can barely comprehend the new laws that govern the place he's in.

for both of them it's such an intense violation of being, and one I wish got more emphasis/recognition. it's really easy to make jokes about how Lucanis could be better at sharing/compromise with Spite more (like I make them too myself, it's easy) but really just... man. this isn't like with Anders & Justice, who agreed to their situation, or Wynne where Faith is content to be mostly a silent passenger and did it to save her life. Lucanis and Spite are suffering the most complete form of intimacy under the worst circumstances, and neither actually wanted it. which makes it honestly impressive at all that (unhardened) Lucanis & Spite are able to reach an accord at all by the end. like i'm glad that they did--and have SO many thoughts (& fanfic WIPs lol) exploring just how they managed to get there--but boy was it hard won, if you actually look deeper into it than the game has room to explore.

[yllwjktscult]

this is a very very VERY long rant, but it needs to be said, so:

This a friendly reminder that THESE girls are 17-18 (probably some even 19 due to being stranded here for year and half and not being clarified when they were born), they are JUST kids (i feel like most people are forgetting about this fact that these girls are just teenagers who were so excited to play soccer at nationals and didnt know, that they will be stuck in the wilderness for 19 months, go thru hell and do things in order to survive).

Ofc they will do questionable things that would make you hate them/dislike them, they are just kids. they didnt even thought they would or could get rescued anymore. They had to adapt to their new life out there.

so heres a friendly reminder that:

!!! Spoilers for S3 in here so dont read if you havent seen it yet !!!

THIS is a 17-18 (probably 19 at this time) year old lottie without her meds who just killed a guy because she wanted to protect her friends (mind you shes schizophrenic and she probably thought they wanted to harm them. First human contact in months, that werent her friends. she thinks what she she did was right :( )

she saw the hikers as a thread to the way they live now. Lottie probably doesnt want to go home because back home, she was 'punished' for her visions, but here in the wilderness, they were appreciated and seen as truth (which some of them were). She was appreciated and be finally herself.

THIS is a 17 year old nat who just killed her coach, who begged her for weeks to kill him. The only father figure she had, butchered him and got under a lot pressure of her friends for several things for months (she feels guilty for javis death, jackies death and now bens death. and as well the pressure of being a leader and before that, being the ones together with travis to be responsible for food)

THIS is a 17 year old misty who HAD to fight for ben in trial, who she talked out of a suicide attempt before. Killed her best friend. Helped to give BIRTH as a teenager (and took a place as a 'nurse')

THIS is a 18 year old Mari trying to redo whats done. The one shauna took her anger the most at. Knowing their way to back to society was just ruined because someone who she looked up to before just killed their ticket to home.

shes was a scared teenager who followed the one who leaded/was in "charge" because she was scared teenager girl who just wanted to survive and wanted to have someone to 'lean on' in this tough times, so ofc she will switch up when a new "leader" happens. She just want to live..

she didnt want to rat Ben out, she couldnt find a believable lie they would believe (and was intimidated by shauna). She voted him innocent the whole time. She saw him suffering and thats why she was glad Nat did what she did. She loved ben esp after spending time with him in the cave. She was glad he didnt have to suffer anymore.

THIS is a 17-18 year old Shauna who was butchering for months, not only animals, but also a kid, a kid she was close with. Shauna who gave birth as a teenager in the middle of nowhere without medical help and lost her baby, lost her best friend forever due to an argument all in just matter of months.

Her hate and actions this season are very valid actually

THIS is a 17-18 (also like Lottie, probably 19) year old Taissa who saw her soulmate (almost) die in front of her. Who developed probably DID due to the trauma and the evil Tai took over her to 'protect' her from it.

THIS is a 17-18 year old van who got attacked by a wolf who almost killed her (in fact she did die for a while and almost got burned in a plane) who just wants to go home even if its her mother whos neglecting and abusing her.

THIS is a 16-17 year old travis who got sa'd, lost his father AND a brother, had a pressure of being a hunter and provider of food together with Nat. Who got pressured doing shrooms as a form of therapy (and connecting to wilderness) and started his addiction here. He was an outsider, he didnt knew these girls as they knew eachtoher. He was all alone when his brother died.

they were just kids. ofc they will act like how they did out there. Ofc they would start a 'cult'/their own society in here. They didnt thought they could get rescued anymore. They gave up hope on that months ago.

the concept of wilderness or it is the girls coping mechanism to deal with the fact, that they are stranded somewhere they have no idea where they are and the fact they might have never been back to society again.

They accepted that this is their life, so ofc they would react how they did when there was a possible change of that.

In fact, Ben indeed was their bridge to home. If Nat didnt kill him, didnt 'celebrate' his death and if they didnt sing, the hikers wouldnt find them.

So at some point, he indeed did save them, not right away, but eventually. Because the hikers will get missing and a rescue will come look for them (because they know where they went) and instead of the frog hikers, they will find the girls.

You can dislike the character but keep in mind, those girls are just teenager girls trying to survive what life throwed at them, aka, being in the middle of wilderness.

Hating a character in this show is too much imo. All of the characters are beautifully written and portrayed by the actors. If you hate the character i assume you dont understand them (which is fine!!) but i feel like the hate is actually so forced and people are forgetting THAT THEY ARE JUST KIDS who didnt even in their worse nightmares thought they will be stuck in the wilderness when the plane crashed.

yes, each girl did some questionable things that might have make you dislike them, each one of them has their pros and cons but THEY ARE JUST TRAUMATISED KIDS TRYING TO SURVIVE.

me personally i am not a big fan of shauna and taissa, both adult and teen timeline, however thats what makes them so interesting to me. I wanna learn more why they act the way the do so i can understand them more. And i know, over time i will.

Lottie, nat, mari and misty are my favourite since season 1 for multiple reasons, but mostly because i see myself in them, not completely but i see myself in them.

so over all, this is just a friendly reminder that these girls, the ones you are hating on, are just traumatised teenagers who tried their best to survive somewhere in the middle of nowhere without knowing they will get rescued one day.

it probably does not make sense, but my point was just to point out that they are just kids and the hate im seeing everywhere on each mentioned girl (and travis) is making me sad.

Like, are we all watching the same show? This incredibly amazing show, that shows how trauma and ptsd makes you act/develops you into a different person?

[irenespring]

I am at this scene right now in my rewatch and it is DESTROYING ME like it always does.

Because one of Kerry's defining motivations is searching for family. Wanting to belong, to fit in somewhere, and to be loved. And she tries this in a number of ways, including trying to find her birth parents, her numerous failed attempts at entry into the ER found family unit, arguably her whole ambition that gets mistaken for pure Machiavellianism (that is a Much longer story).

Here she is literally trying to hire a father figure. She says she loves Lawrence like a father. In her mind this is the best thing ever to happen. She's still suffering from a completely self-caused social backlash (one of very few) in that deal she made with Romano, and here she can do what she always thought she could do but has never worked before and never will again: use her power to get people to love her! Her deal with the devil was worth it because now she can hire her dad! He can work with her! And now she isn't alone! She has someone in the building! Who cares about her!

And he says so. That is a huge deal. He tells everyone who will listen how great he thinks Kerry is and he tells her all the time he thinks she's amazing. He tells her fun little stories of their time working together. He compliments her intelligence and her leadership, and he respects her policies (even the goofy badge idea). Some of that is just to cover when he forgets things and needs her to focus on other stuff, but even then he means it. After years of constant mockery and constant rejection. Mockery and rejection from the people Lawrence is now praising her to. You can practically feel how elated she is to have him there through the screen. She has someone to talk to, someone who is always happy to see her. She really is just so happy. It's everything she ever wanted, going back to when she first hired that PI. She found a parent.

And then it crumbles. And she fucking grabs at the vanishing particles, the way she insists that no, it isn't possible, he isn't sick, he doesn't have to leave, please, don't make him, she needs him, please. Then, because the writers hate her and me and human decency, there's the knife twist that she has to fire him and he storms out on her. She is forced to wreck this relationship just like she has wrecked all her other ER relationships.

ER is supposed to be a found family. It hasn't been for Kerry, until Lawrence. Now she behaves exactly like the loved ones of patients who are going to die. Telling their clearly dying family members about miracle cures, telling them to hang on just a little longer. She can't let go. Because she was happy. More than that, she doesn't want to be alone again.

The suicide element, just as Kerry is working herself up about clinical trials and hope is a brilliant piece of writing. It is also fascinating given that Kerry is someone who is (or at least will be, I will probably write much more on this when I get to s8e1 because holy shit) periodically suicidal. Also the fact that the end of Lawrence's speech is "nobody coming to see me." This is also hell for Kerry. She understands this.

So the "I'll come and see you" is 1) True. When Kerry finds the woman she thinks is her mother in the nursing home, she cares for her arguably too well, beyond the woman's wishes. She sits by her bed. Talks to her. Spends every moment she can with her. Despite all evidence that woman: doesn't know where she is, who she is, doesn't know Kerry is there. Kerry will show up no matter what. 2) in Kerry's mind, enough. One person made all the difference for her these past couple episodes. Just to have one person there is a game changer.

There's something horribly ominous in the way the last scene of the episode isn't this scene but Jeanie packing up. I think it's supposed to be ending on a happier note, but it drives home that Kerry also lost HER ONE OTHER REAL FRIEND THIS EPISODE. She is now very isolated. She'll be pretty much alone facing the paradigm shift of season 7 (for the aftereffects of that, see my comment on s8e1).

In conclusion: The show loves to torture Kerry Weaver because it thinks it is either funny, moral, or standard-trope-so-who-cares to torture the neurodivergent lesbian, but this was actually very well done so it gets a pass. The tragedy here is peak.

[1nkwe4ver]

Okay had a thought from a comment on one of my posts that helped me articulate something

I was a few paragraphs deep into defending innie Mark’s feelings for Helly despite the persons issues with it (they’re only being together for a few weeks/months, the focus on whether Mark could tell the difference between Helly/Helena never being resolved, the shows sudden shift to having so much romance)

And like, I have arguments defending my opinions on Markhelly, sure. But I realized as I rambled them- my real feelings about Mark’s decision at the end of that hallway were not about Markhelly or Markgemma. Just like the show isn’t really about shipping or romance.

Here’s the thing: I’d argue that if Petey was still alive, (and their relationship remained platonic), he could have been the one at the end of that hallway, with a bit less romantic of a look, and I would have still bought the decision. Hell, I might have bought it as things are if Irving miraculously appeared. (would have been on the edge of my seat for how they explained that in season three, but just as an example.)

Because it’s not about the romance. It’s about the innies.

The show took a turn at the end of season 2- a predictable one, but at the same time one that seems to come out of nowhere.

We spend two seasons building up these characters, and their issues, and a whole new sci-fi-esque oppressed group of people.

And yet what was our conflict and goal really about? Who was our main character?

In one sense- Mark, of course.

But if we divide it between Innie and Outie Mark- Outie Mark is significant, but the show is not about him. And yet it has been. This whole show has been like- is Outie Mark gonna choose to help Petey? Reintegrate? Omg, his wife is down there? We have to save her!! And saving her has been the main goal for a while.

And Innie Mark wants to save her. He does. He’s a good person, he doesn’t want her to suffer.

But all this running around, romance with Helly, revolution, all that- it’s led to something else- he values his own life. We know it, we agree with it, and yet we still almost have the same surprised reaction Outie Mark does when he asserts it.

There is a distinct, hopeless tragedy looming over Mark and Helly this whole episode, because despite all we’ve been led to care about Innies being people and Innies having autonomy and innies having lives that end if their Outies never come back to work- in the final episode, doing the “right thing” is going to trap them.

It’s not the Innie’s world out there. Tomorrow they’re going to be gone no matter what they do. The last bit of good they do, is an act of good for the Outies. Mark *may* reintegrate if his Outie isn’t lying. If his outie will risk it after he has everything he wants. If that even still means some form of existence for innie Mark, cause won’t his 40 years swallow up innie Mark’s two? And Helly simply has no chance. Helena will never reintegrate. And Helly probably doesn’t want to be reintegrated with that kind of person.

So they are trapped. Alone, really. The show that seemed to be about the Innies has become Outies vs Lumon, using the Innies and their rebellion as foot soldiers to save one Outie woman. Innie Mark has been holding on by his finger nails trying to find a way to choose Innies, but there’s no way. No Option C. Mark and Helly expect to die.

But then our protagonist is faced with a pivotal decision. A couple of steps from leaving, making the final sacrifice for the Outies, ceasing to exist- which he hesitates to do even in his rush because that’s fucking scary-

Helly appears. Finally, Option C.

She’s not just the woman he loves. She got more Innies on her side. She’s got a minor resistance going. There’s a chance they could hold things off for a day. A few hours. An hour. A few minutes. Anything. Of course they’re not gonna win. Who said you have to win to make a difference?

Is it really love between them? Something objectively as true and full as what Outie Mark has with Gemma?

Who fucking cares? He’s been alive for 2 years. A couple of months must feel like a couple of Marks years, relatively. Not to mention, she changed everything about him. Set him free emotionally. Revolutionized him.

Who cares if it’s not quite up to Outie standards?

So what if they have half a love?

So what if they have half a life?

You expect them not to fight for it?

[lazyjellyfishcreation]

yoo, I got another spn fic idea

It's a destiel fic, exept Sam in irrevocably part of the story, like all destiel stories should be, cause there ain't no Dean if there ain't no Sam, we should know this by now. also, some saileen in the back!

It's a historic setting, think medieval. John Winchester is the leader of a small farming village, that once a year sacrifice a young man or woman to a nearby deity (Castiel) to keep him placated. it's an age old tradition, that once a year, a name is drawn from all the young people between 15 and 30, to be chosen as a sacrifice.

this time, it's Dean.

the name is chosen and it turns out to be dean and sam trows a fit of epic proportions. fuck the village, these people are not taking his big brother. Eventually Sam gets jumped by a mob of guards/farmers to keep him from physically attacking his father when he refused to take Sam instead of Dean ('the fate has been decided')

dean has to intervene, and manages to convince Sam to not make this harder, please. only after that does sam give in.

or does he?

Dean is held in a cellar, beautifully decked out with the best furniture, the softest bed, and all the beautiful sheets and wildflowers as his last night alive. Sam is thrown in the town prison to cool down, because they genuinely fear he's gonna break his brother out of the cellar and book it, dooming the village.

the next evening-fall, Dean gets dressed up in the most beautiful white linens and flowers in his hair, and he would complain about feeling like a chick if he want about to be executed by some monster, so he keep his mouth shut.

Sam on the other hand, has been let out of the cell, to bid his brother goodbye, seemingly having excepted this.

he has not.

he has poisoned the town mead with sleeping drought.

the second dean is led into the woods, the people start the feast, celebrating another year in which their harvest will be plentiful, due to the noble sacrifice of one of their own.

not 30 minutes later, the whole village is dead asleep, except sam, who is awake and packing his bags. this man is gonna kill a god today, and nothing can stop him. he is on a mission, and the mission is to get his brother and get the fuck out of here.

he grabs his and his brothers swords, and books it out, running to get to dean before the deity does.

when he gets there, dean does not agree with his plan, because he was chosen, to die was his duty.

the conversation goes like this.

Sam: im here to come get you out of here,

Dean: no, you can't do that, the village with suffer

Sam: man, fuck the village, i don't want you to die, i don't care about them, I care about you

Dean: I don't wanna die either, but i also don't wanna doom the village and this is my fate.

Sam, knowing how to convince his brother: you really wanna die tied to a post, wearing flowers and a dress, with no pants on like a damsel in distress?

Dean: ...

Dean: fuck, you right, cut me loose.

sam cuts him loose, hands him some pants and a sword and they start booking it trough the forrest.

Castiel, the creature, ready to find his yearly outcast human to take to his hoard of other outcast humans, sees another human, holding a very sharp sword, abducting his outcast human! And the shorter human is clearly supposed to be his outcast human for his small hoard of humans, because he's wearing white and the flowercrown.

cas is not happy about this an intercepts them. the converation goes like this

Castiel: Give him to me

Sam: you can pry him from my cold dead hands if you want him.

Dean, verry worrried: I-

Cas: as thowing him out not enough, you're also gonna threaten my outcast human with a sword

Sam: He's my brother, I won't let you just kill him, no matter what you do to my village

Cas: Kill him? why would I do that? i thougth you didn't want the humans you gave to me so I just kept them, becuase you didn't take propper care of them.

Sam and dean: what?

this conversation lasts a hot minute, before sam and dean sart trusting cas enough to lead them to the other 'outcast humans', as the creature calls them.

cas just leads them into a tunnel, and then out of the tunnel in a large vally circled by cliffs. and there is just? a village? there? with people, young and old? children running around?

Sam: What the fuck??

Castiel: my outcast humans :D

they find charlie, who had been sacrificed years ago, (that was the first time dean had gone against his father, he had be beaten within an inch of his life for speaking up)

Charlie tells them that the neighbouring villages have simular traditions and Cas just started taking all the people from the villages to keep them safe. they're allowed to leave, but very few do.

the village is nice and peaceful and all the people seem to like Castiel and trust him, calling him their angel.

Sam and dean end up staying, and dean totally falls in love with the pretty creature who so carefully watches over all his people.

Meanwhile sam falls in love with a beautiful, strong woman who was left in the woods as a child when he was discovered to be deaf.

life is good.

[kings-highway]

Out of captain squad and captains’ long-suffering boyfriends squad, who’d survive the hunger games?

okay first off to clear the air if I was going to write a hunger games au it would NOT look like this. It's incredibly easy to spin almost any character into a victor if you give them the main character treatment, so please do not think this below is my, like, die-hard AU idea of how it would go. if I WAS to write a hunger games au, I would probably focus significantly more on support staff characters, mentors and stylists surrounding the games and put a lot less of my main characters into the games specifically, and would probably go for a successful rule breaking arena with more than one survivor, as I don't tend to want to bloodbath my characters HOWEVER in service of answering this specific question, I'm going to try and do justice to the way the hunger games are written (mercilessly) and not break any "rules"

assuming all the captains and their applicable boyfriends are reaped from the same districts, I think a reasonable story fitting with the pattern of the hunger game books would be as follows:

right off the bat, Daichi, Iwaizumi, Kuroo and Ushijima are dead in the cornucopia battle. That is because these are the characters that would have taken on the role of trying to get weapons and supplies from the thick of it to give themselves a leg up. Ushijima might be able to brute force his way out of this battle, but he wouldn't escape uninjured, and would probably die the next day in a combat being unable to sufficiently defend himself.

Bokuto and Akaashi, as well as Aran and Kita, both decided to skip the cornucopia entirely. Akaashi deduces quickly where the rest of the teams are going to focus their energy, and they head in the opposite direction giving them space and distance on their half of the arena, but almost no supplies.

Suga would also get out of the cornucopia battle unscathed, but without any supplies.

Suga would end up in Bo and Akaashi's half of the arena trying to survive for however long he could without real supplies. He'd be able to find water but wouldn't be able to sleep at night over fear of getting snuck up on. Exhaustion and hunger would pick at him, and after surviving a good few days would run into Bo and Akaashi and be forced to cooperate with them to share resources and not starve to death. While this is a safe alliance for him, the next time there is trouble, either other tributes or mutts or an arena ploy, Bo and Akaashi would protect each other first and Suga would go down.

Kenma would make it far and fast but he would be alone, and actually do quite well for himself. Clever and quiet he finds a place far towards the edge of the arena and sort of just sets up shop. The problem is that he doesn't have the initiative needed to try and hunt or kill other tributes on his own. Kenma has the potential to win the games if freak accidents took everyone out, because he would remain entirely unknown and invisible for the majority of the time. Kenma would probably make it to last 10, minimum.

He would have a much higher chance of winning the games in an arena like the 75th, where the mechanics require him to constantly be thinking and moving, but in a standard wilderness arena, he would grow a little complacent with it, and eventually succumb to something like tracker jackers or the butterflies, or a mist/flood. Something that can warm him and he can't outsmart.

Aran and Kita end up in a bigger alliance for a little bit, but as numbers in the arena dwindle their alliance does too, and the more bloodthirsy among them turn on them. I imagine they'd die in a slaughter with like 6 other people, trying to fight back. Probably the second biggest since the cornucopia. They might end up spilling some blood themselves though. Good for them. Not easy to take down.

Oikawa would be one of the only contestants actively trying to fight back, and spending his time not looking for resources but other people to try and take down. Not that I'm trying to imply that Oikawa could or would want to kill people, but I think he's the most likely to go "well they all have to die for me to leave this arena so the sooner that happens the better"

This would, ultimately, probably, result in his death in a 1-on-1 fight that he simply underestimated. It would be very dramatic and people in the capitol would love it. People would talk about him like "god he should have won he would have been a perfect victor" and then just smile and continue with their complicity.

Bokuto and Akaashi would be ""boring"" contestants and as a result the gamemakers would be constantly trying to force them closer to the other tributes, using various mutts and arena mechanics (probably resulting in the situation that kills Suga) realizing that these two aren't going to turn on each other or seek out others, and to prevent the audience from getting bored they would eventually release a massive pack of something nightmarish on them and let nature take care of the rest. They'd probably die without seeing a single tribute that wasn't Suga after several days on their side of the arena - they'd probably also be top 10.

Which brings me to my actual answer to this question, which is that coming out on top with a mix of clever predictive abilities and mild sociopathic tendencies, would be Tendou. Now I don't know if he played the games looking to win, in a very murdery way, or if he simply managed to avoid everything that killed everyone else, and was too difficult to catch, but either way I can absolutely see Tendou being the last one standing when the games close HOWEVER I also think he would immediately kill himself as a fuck you to the capitol. Not in the Katniss-Peeta "oh we're gonna do this together to call their bluff" no, no, Dude hears the bells go off and the cannons signifying the end of the games, realies he's won, and the moment he sees that plane coming in to take him out he has consumed more poison than any body could ever handle. I just think he would like ruining their games by not letting them have a victor. Also he was barely hanging on to his sanity in his normal life he is too mentally ill to handle this much additional trauma. so. out. on national television while everyone is watching. bye bye.

Anyway that's all folks hope you enjoyed the games.

[jellycreamjammedart]

Since you drew your own version of Dough Cassie (Doussie), how do you think Doey would react upon seeing her in this new form?

I’m sorry, but I just love the design you made for her so much! She’s adorable!

Thinking further I think I like the name "Dassie" better for that design (more closely matches the pattern for Doey's name which is Joey with a D, being Cassie with a D.)

Anyway I think at least some of it would depend on how that wound up happening in the first place.

Was she discovered by The Doctor despite Doey's efforts to keep her safe? Was it a last resort to save her life from a fatal injury (like CatNap or even Jack himself) or something? Etc etc

The circumstances would matter regarding how Doey would feel in some aspects. But the gist of it all is that he certainly wouldn't like the implications of it AT ALL.

As a human Cassie was stuck with them down in the factory thanks to her elevator ride to hell, sure, but if she ever made it out somehow then she would be free to leave, that would be it. But now she wouldn't be just stuck, she'd be stuck STUCK. She no longer would have a chance of a normal human life or a normal future, or be able to reintegrate herself back into society. She'd already lost so much up to this point, and yet what little she had left would have been ripped away from her too.

And it's not fair. Doey would be furious on her behalf, and sad too, and yet another thing for him to feel guilty about; he certainly would feel like he failed to protect her from a suffering and perverse fate he and the other toys know too well, and guilty that hadn't she gotten attached and stuck around trying to help them then maybe she wouldn't have been doomed along with the rest of them.

Even her being a playdough toy just like him would have been bittersweet at best; while he deeply loves and cares for all the toys in Safe Haven without a lick of doubt, there is a closeness or kinship he likely would share with Cassie/Dassie only (he even mentions in his Reminder tape how the other toys "aren't like him" and he probably feels a bit alienated over that no matter how much the toys love him back.) And even with Cassie/Dassie being a lot more like him than anyone else he would still feel some of that alienation with her too, as he still would've been the one made with three different unfortunate children while Cassie/Dassie most likely was just Cassie.

Also, Cassie ain't perfect but she wants to be good to others, and by nature she is a kind person, but then in this scenario she wound up turned into something "only made to hurt things," just like how Doey sees himself. He did not come to be through happy means, and seeing that Cassie got put through nearly the exact same identical means to make something that matches him so closely is not at all the kinship he'd want; he certainly would 100% rather have had continued being found family with her as her human self than this.

But on the other side of things, having this similarity with one another then would mean he'd be the one most equipped (maybe even the only one equipped) with helping her through this, and by god he'd be hellbent on being that figure to her. He would see, treat and love that little mass of cherry red/purple/green dough as his baby sister and he'd die on that hill.

That would be not how Doey would want to have a family again, but he'd know Cassie/Dassie would need him more than ever and he'd try his best to be that family to her too.

Because, and this isn't even regarding just Doey and Cassie/Dassie but all those in Safe Haven: what would they have left down there, if not one another?

[infiniteeight8]

Stephen finding out about magic in the unhinged timetraveller tony series

This got long. Oops?

Edit: Previous parts can be found here.

-

Stephen is sitting on a stool at his apartment’s breakfast bar, looking into the kitchen and watching Tony cook dinner—a pasta dish, apparently a family recipe—when a hole in the world opens up and someone steps through it. 

There’s really no other way to describe it: the circle of crackling sparks frame another place. If he’d seen it on the news, Stephen would have scoffed in disbelief, but seeing it in person… it makes his stomach lurch uncomfortably to see there brought here. The figure who steps through makes it no less surreal. They’re medium height, slender, and dressed in bright yellow robes with a hood that obscures their face. The hole in the world closes behind them.

Stephen doesn’t see much more than that before Tony is stepping between him and the figure. He curls his hands into fists and the bracelets he wears on each wrist unravel in some mass-defying way and form a pair of red and gold gauntlets. When he raises them, they glow with turquoise light. “You can’t have him,” Tony says grimly.

Him? Why would this… person… want Stephen?

The figure lifts their hands and pushes their hood back, revealing a woman with a smooth, bare scalp and eyes that have seen as much or more than Tony’s have. As much as Stephen dislikes being cast as the damsel in distress, he keeps quiet. Tony doesn’t talk much about the time or world he came from, and Stephen doesn’t ask, but it’s left marks on him that speak eloquently. This is not a confrontation that calls for a surgeon.

“Your meddling has greatly disrupted the timeline, Mr. Stark,” she says, lips pursed.

Tony snorts. “You only just noticed? I’ve been here for months. Oh wait!” His moment of ‘revelation’ is comically exaggerated. “You were expecting Stephen to arrive at Kamar-Taj about now, weren’t you?”

“He was meant to be the best of us,” the stranger intones.

If the solemnity is meant to move Tony, it fails. “You mean he was meant to die for you,” Tony says flatly. “Over and over and over again. Well, tough shit. This time, Stephen gets to live the life he wanted.” 

She raises her eyebrows. “And what of the threats he would have defeated?”

“I’ve already taken care of Thanos,” Tony shoots back. “As for Dormammu, here, I’ll give you a tip: use the Time Stone to trap him in a loop. After he’s killed you a few hundred times, he’ll get bored and agree to a deal.”

The stranger’s brow creases. She steps to the side and meets Stephen’s gaze over Tony’s shoulder. “You have been peering at the world through a keyhole,” she says. “Do you not wish to see the fullness of reality?”

Stephen almost wants to laugh. She’s chosen entirely the wrong argument for someone who built his life around neurosurgery: it’s a specialty within a specialty. Stephen is far more interested in depth of understanding rather than breadth. “Not particularly,” he says dryly. “And certainly not when it sounds very much like you’re trying to convince me to do the dying hundreds of times so that you don’t have to.”

“You have not merely delayed his growth,” she says to Tony, waving at Stephen, “you have pushed it back. Is this selfishness worthy of the Stephen Strange that you knew?”

“Why is it never the people judging ‘worthiness’ who have to die on its altar?” Tony asked darkly. “Make your own sacrifices. Stephen is done suffering for you, and so am I.”

The stranger studies both of them for a long moment. “I see that I must. He is hardly suitable now.” She turns away from them and, with a sweep of her hand, re-opens the hole in the world and disappears through it. Only when the last spark had died does Tony turn to Stephen, gauntlets retreating back into his bracelets. 

“Who was that?” Stephen asks.

Tony walks into the kitchen and examines the sauce he was working on. Apparently it survived the interruption, because he goes back to cooking. “Head of the wizards,” he says shortly. Then sighs and looks up at Stephen. “The other Stephen’s mentor in magic.”

Stephen would scoff, but he’d watched her step through a hole in the world. Twice. Tony is watching him warily. What is he afraid of? That I’ll decide I want to pursue that path after all, Stephen realizes after a moment. ‘He was meant to be the best of us,’ she’d said. If that other Stephen had invested himself in magic as much as Stephen has in neurosurgery… Well, he can see why Tony might worry.

“I’ve no interest in learning magic,” Stephen assures Tony firmly. “I love what I do, Tony. I love everything about it, and I am already the best. I don’t know what drove that other Stephen to learn magic, but if he was me once, I imagine he didn’t have much of a choice.”

Tony relaxes and Stephen knows he’s hit the nail on the head. “He didn’t,” Tony affirms. 

“You gave me the chance to choose,” Stephen says. “And I choose this life.” He waves a hand around him, including Tony in the sweep. 

Tony smiles.

[joshsilverseyebrow]

peter steele for KERRANG! Magazine (1999),

(VIA BiggestBaddestWolve ON REDDIT)

(OP has said it suffered some water damage, so i’m transcribing what i can read from the first full sentence i can make out. but i hope you still enjoy!)

THE DYING GAME

“I’m waiting for the strength to kill myself…” PETER STEELE

But, consistent with recent interviews in which he’s disparaged the album as a “waste of money,” he’s about as interested in playing his record company's hard sell games as the Pope is in the contents of Pamela Anderson's bikini. He admits that he's only here at all because “I promised the other guys (guitarist Kenny Hickey, keyboardist Josh Silver and drummer Johnny Kelly) that I'd do my job.”

Steele's apathy is all the more surprising given that “World Coming Down” is his band's most complete, cohesive and fully-realized work to date. It's also arguably the New York quartet's bleakest recording: an album which resonates with world-weary cynicism and self-loathing and sees Steele cheerlessly embracing self-destructive urges and yearning for descent into oblivion.

Given his huge appetite for sarcasm and deadpan piss-taking, the album's none-more-black atmosphere verges on goth-metal parody - but today it's disturbingly evident that Steele's current dark mood isn't just an ironic affectation.

"I FEEL like a total ingrate," he sighs, slumping his massive frame into a leather-bound armchair as we retire to the hotel bar. "I have a great life, I have my health, my family and friend; I'm not the worst-looking person in the world, I've got a half-way decent band - and yet I'm not happy. I'm just waiting for the strength to kill myself."

From other rock stars, such whinging might seem like mere melodrama. But when Peter Steele admits to suicidal thoughts, his matter-of-fact musings are coloured by personal experience. On October 15, 1989, tanked up with alcohol and self-pity, the vocalist slashed both his wrists and crawled into the back seat of his car to die. “At that time it was because my girlfriend had left me and took 95 per cent of me with her. I thought I could not go on without her,” he sighs.

“Obviously I was wrong.

“The worst part was actually

coming home and hearing that my ex-girlfriend's mother had phoned my Mom and told her that i'd been hammering on her door with blood dripping from me. That was really embarrassing.”

At the risk of sounding unsympathetic, isn't slashing your wrists more of an attention-seeking act than a genuine suicide attempt?

"I wanted to shoot myself in the head," he shrugs, "but I couldn't get a gun - which is kinda ironic, considering you seem to be able to buy a gun on every corner in Brooklyn. Okay, it was probably not a wholehearted attempt last time - but next time it will be. Life is a game, and like cards sometimes you have to know when to stop playing. l'm not getting anything out of this any more.”

You must have fans writing to you telling you that Type O Negative's music has got them through difficult times - what do you think those fans are going to make of what you're saying today?

Steele shrugs, and drains his first glass of red wine.

“I’d advise anyone who's depressed to stop reading right now,” he smiles.

THE SHADOW of death hangs ominously over “World Coming Down,” Songs like “Everyone I Love Is Dead” and “Everything Dies” are rested in tragic personal experiences for Peter Steele.

The album was written in the aftermath of the death of his father on February 14, 1995, and recorded during a period when Steele lost an aunt and uncle and watched his mother battle againat serious illness for almost a year in a New York hospital.

"I expected her to die," Steele says quietly, "and unfortunately I still think she'll be next to go. One of the most traumatic things in life is loving someone and watching them die and knowing you can't help them. I just don't know how to handle watching people die. Maybe It's cowardice but I truly wish I'm next. I've tried everything in excess - Prozac, alcohol, cocaine and women - in an effort to deal with life. Nothing works for me.”

Steele says that his parents never discussed his own suicide attempt, but admits: "I think I hurt them a lot." The death of his father, has had a "profound effect" on the singer.

Is there anything you wish you'd asked your father before he died?

“I’d just like to have asked, Why didn't you spend more time with me?,” Steele says, sounding uncharacteristically vulnerable. “When I was a kid and he'd come home from work, it was like Superman coming to the house, but I always felt like I was some little happy dog that was always underfoot and he was always trying to kick me away.”

The youngest of six children - he has five elder sisters - Steele can trace his current feelings of worthlessness right back to his childhood.

“I used to feel that I was an unsuccessful abortion,” he sighs. "That I’d pulled myself out of the bottom of the bucket and lived. I remember when school would start, my father would say things like, ‘Now we have to buy him clothes’, and I’d just wish I could unzip my skin, crawl out and slime myself under the bed and die. I felt like such a piece of shit.

“My mother still doesn't have a good word for my father,” he reveals.

“I don't think she ever forgave him for inflicting kids upon her. I'd love to say to her, 'Mom, if he was such a prick, why did you stay?’ He didn't seem a bad guy to me. I think he was just tired by the time I was born. My mother had me when she was 39 and my father was about 41.”

No offence intended, but as the youngest of six kids, did you consider the possibility that your conception might have been a mistake?

“Put it this way, there was an average of three years between my sisters, but there was eight years between me and my nearest sister,” Steele replies without flinching. “I know I'm just the result of a biological urge at four in the morning when the pharmacy was closed."

DEATH FIRST impinged upon Peter Steele's consciousness at the age of seven, when his grandfather passed away (“I didn't really understand what was going on but I saw my mother was crying, and thought that it was probably my fault,” he notes). Born of Russian and Icelandic parentage, Steele grew up in the middle of two theo-fascistic ideologies - Catholicism on one side and the Orthodox church on other”, and although he recalls praying after the deaths of his grandfather and uncle, he rejects the Christian notion of life after death.

“If Hell does exist, then I'm certainly going there,” he smiles. “I actually think it's cruel that someone who suffered their whole life is just going to go to the grave and share the same fate as people like Hitler or Stalin, who deserve to go to Hell, But no one said life is fair.”

Do you believe you have a soul?

“No, I'm just a very inefficient meat machine lubricated with mucus and semen,” he answers.

And you don't fear dying?

“I don't fear death, but i fear dying.” Steele confesses. “The thought of being in a car accident or being burned and lying in a hospital suffering is horrible. I don't like pain - If I found out I had cancer, l'd probably rob a bunch of banks and hope I'd get shot by the police.”

So when you shuffle off this mortal coil, how would you like to go?

“I've been thinking of the cleanest way to kill myself recently,” he admits.

“Everyone talks about poisoning themselves - but you vomit and shit everywhere, which is not cool. A shot in the head would be ideal, but I'd feel sorry for the person who had to clean my f**king brains up.

“I’ve got a tidier solution, actually," he smiles. "I want to attach a water pipe to the wall of my house and then take one of my weightlifting bars, sharpen the end like a spear and place it into the top of the pipe about 40 feet off the ground, with a rope attached. Then I'd lie under the other end of the pipe, point it at my temple and let go of the rope. Gravity would take its course and it wouldn't be too messy. That would be a neat end to all this misery.”

You don't go along with the view that suicide is the coward's way out?

“No, anyone who kills him or herself automatically gains my respect,” Steele shrugs, betraying not a flicker of a smile. “No one knows what lies beyond, and it's a trip from which there is no return. You have to admire anyone who'll willingly step into the unknown.”

You don't think it's a selfish act?

“It is, but I don't think if I killed myself 'd be affecting anyone detrimentally.” he considers. “If I had a wife and child I might think differently.

“I'm starting to think that children are maybe what I need, actually,” he continues. “Maybe bringing new life into the world is a way of replacing the void you feel when you lose someone. At the moment, though, I don't think that I could be so cruel to a woman as to implant her with my demon seed.”

SUCH COMMENTS are a reminder that even when discussing grave matters, Peter Steele's bone-dry sense of humour is never far from the surface. The singer concedes that “sarcasm has always been part of my insecurity” and admits: “It's a strange thing that when I'm lying people believe me, and when I'm telling the truth they don't.” But he insists that he's deadly serious about initiating his own exit from this life.

“I know someday I'll do it, I just don't know when,” he smiles. “When I feel l've become more of a burden than a help to those around me, It'll be time to take that swan-dive from the World Trade Centre. But one of the things that gives me a slight glimmer of happiness is irritating people, so l continue to live just to annoy them.

“But nothing gives me pleasure ary more,” he sighs, gulping down the dregs of his second glass of wine. “I’ve become really nihilistic and I just wonder who's going to be next to die. And I pray to God - if She's listening - that it's me.”

TYPE O Negative's ‘World Coming Down' album is out now.

[sayakxmi]

Lmao, I feel ya. I ramble abt Chrono Stone issues a lot, too. For me it's still in the top 3, because I love GO with my entire heart, but CS is definitely on a thin ice, and half of my affection for it comes from my own rewrite of it (shameless promo). It really pains me, though, because the concept is amazing, just the execution that leaves A LOT to be desired.

I'm pretty sure I've said something similar - found it, here! Yeah, CS suffers greatly from just having too much ground to cover, as a result not having enough time to not only have characters be, yknow, friends, but also to even cover what it wants well. There are exceptions, sure, but it's extremely felt. I won't repeat myself here, tho. What I can say is that Chrono Stone is aggressively plot-driven, to the point of neglecting its characters unless it's their time to miximax.

Yeaa. I think GO is for the most part fine, tbh, but CS is a tragedy, and Galaxy is only marginally better. Much as I love it. There's a lot of stuff, even characters, that aren't given anywhere near as much attention as they needed. Idk, potentially a spoiler but Minaho is such an underused character I'm still salty. He (alongside Tsurugi) was the first to notice Matatgi's Dark-trademark side, it could've been such an interesting dynamic between the two, half of the characters don't interact with each other, Shindou's literal only real connection, excluding Raimon), is Ibuki... And don't get me started on how Faram Orbius is handled or Ozrock plot in general. I have A LOT to criticize it for.

Also, 100% agreed. It's actually something I recall myself talking with people before - how Fei's only bonds (in Raimon) are Tenma and Kinako (more bc he's literally her son than because they're close or anything - speaking of which, what I NEEDED was for Kinako to become friends with Fei, and actually, yknow, put some work to get to know her kid, instead of running of info from Asurei, essentially - I wanted to see her organically grow to care about him).

It pales especially when compared to Fubuki. Both are their series' 2nd season's central characters, and the difference is like a night and day. Fubuki has numerous important bonds and they are all necessary for his development, Endou, Someoka, Aphrodi, Gouenji... from the top of my head. (And his interactions with their opponents are important, too). And still you feel like he's a part of the team, and not just, essentially, Tenma's friend from the future who also plays with us. Like, Fubuki mattered to everybody, and Fubuki cared about them, too - it was never something that you felt the need to question. With Fei I'd say the only person he genuinely cares about is Tenma, and even that relationship feels more like it's running on They're Similar :) than them actually being friends.

As I've said in that other post, even Shindou and Tsurugi aren't given all that much focus beyond their arcs. Sure, they get a bit more for the main trio status, but it's still very little. It's something I still recall myself noting while watching&rewatching CS. I think Tsurugi even moreso? But that's speaking from memory, I'd have to finish the rewatch to say for sure.

And yeah. Also. Fucking Torb. Like, I don't dislike him, ok? But he's a randomass late addition that doesn't get much of anything, to be honest. He's just kinda there. Kariya should've had this miximax and I'll die on this hill. Especially after he gave Kirino that chance, it kinda felt like he desevred something for it smh.

Gamma is there to be used by Zanark, which pisses me off so fucking much I just can't. Like, I genuinely feel more bad for him than I should. Bro was just trying to do his job & was soul hijacked by a random criminal or whatnot, and then yeeted out, too, for the good measure. Zanark, too, while he has some stuff going, it's just... not enough... He join Raimon on a whim, he miximaxes just like that, and anyway, cool, we spent the entire season finding all these ppl/dinosaurs to miximax, and he just... rushes it, essentially. It feels too random, too fast, kinda like the writers woke up, realized there was one person missing, and just threw Zanark there. Like, I can genuinely believe that Zanark was always meant to join, but his arc is so fragmented that it starts to feel out of nowhere.

All of this. But even aside from that, what I wished was for exploration of Shindou and Kirino's relationship, especially post-France. I don't remember, so correct me, did Shindou notice that Kirino was starting to doubt himself before they went there? Like, Kirino is very attentive to Shindou's emotional state, we've seen it, but I don't recall Shindou ever doing the same. I love him dearly, but it does feel like he takes Kirino's presence and support for granted. And, sure, you can chalk it up to Shindou's trust in Kirino being that strong, but there's trusting, and there's ignoring the emotional well-being of your best friend. Kariya was far more attentive and showed far more care for Kirino if my memory doesn't fail me.

Literally just said that, lol. But the positon was a defender, so my pick is Kariya. Like, again, I don't dislike the character or the concept, but it's undeniable that he is the most useless character there. He's more of a gag character than a character, which is something I despise.

Yeaaaaaaa

Are you fucking kidding me dude I'm living my best life here, I love talking and I love discussing, literally the only thing I can say is add your part in the post not in the tag you coward it's not like i did the same

still thinking about them. they're both wearing green sob

i love this scene so bad, kirino walks up to this nobleman with no fear, tells him like it is and when kinako sees it she jumps in to support him, letting him do the main talking and have his moment while she gets to taunt the guy (and use her upperclassman as a shield skshfhfkjs). her support of kirino during this arc was SO sweet. she liked jeanne too, she connected with her as well but she saw that as much as she wanted to miximax with her, it was not something she needed. but kirino did, so she selflessly decided to help him achieve that :( screaming crying throwing up

truly the duo of all time, if chrono stone bothered to give them more moments together

[batcavescolony]

Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.

[tariah23]

The manga industry, especially JUMP, needs to hurry up and do away with weekly scheduling for mangaka. There needs to better regulations put into place for their health and safety because this is pitiful. Two weeks - monthly updates should’ve already been the standard for the manga industry at this point. These money grabbers will only continue to put the lives of these artists at stake for the sake of capitalism unless some serious changes are implemented.

[whos-the-seme]

"You promised!" Shang Qinghua, despite his efforts, couldn't stop the gasping sobs. "You said you wouldn't leave me behind again! And then you died then and you're dying now and you promised!"

Shen Yuan reached for the other, fighting through the darkness and blurriness encroaching his vision. He managed to grasp his best friend's cheek, weak fingers brushing away the falling tears. "I'm sorry--"

"No! You don't get to be sorry," Shang Qinghua tried to sneer but his face crumpled instead. He didn't shake off Shen Yuan's hand. "This is the second time you're leaving. That's all you know how to do, isn't it? All you do is run away!"

"Qinghua--" Shen Yuan tried to say, but began to cough, hand falling away. The pain was unbearable and it was making it difficult to take in air. Shang Qinghua immediately reached out to steady him as Shen Yuan hacked out his lungs. In between each new flare of pain that swam along with every cough, Shen Yuan could make out the mumbles of his best friend.

"I didn't mean it, please, I didn't mean it, please not now, I didn't mean to say that, I'm sorry, please, please..."

This was familiar. The pain, the loss of breath, even his best friend beside him, keeping him upright. All that was missing was the hospital bed and the frantic beeping of machines. No nurses coming to save his ass now in this forest.

Shen Yuan briefly lost consciousness and when he came back to himself, vision clearing a little, he found Shang Qinghua holding his wrist, pouring more qi into him. As if they hadn't already discovered that qi transfers didn't work when the thing taking all of his was the poison of a Soul-Sucking Bewildered-beest. Shang Qinghua could've tried to get him back to the sect but Shen Qingqiu would have been long drained of qi and, most importantly, dead by then. He couldn't fly and transfer qi at the same time.

It only prolonged the inevitable.

"S-stop," he said, weakly pushing at Shang Qinghua's hand. The other ignored him. "You're gonna d-drain yourself. And then you won't be able to get back at all."

"I don't care," Shang Qinghua said. Shen Yuan wondered how long he had lost consciousness for, as the tear tracks on Shang Qinghua's face were now mostly dry. "You promised."

"I know," Shen Yuan didn't apologize again. "But you know it's not gonna work. And I'd rather you return, at least." He could feel his eyelids getting heavy.

Shang Qinghua let go of him only to throw up his hands in anger. Fresh tears were starting to spill down his cheeks again. "So what? I just leave you here to die without even trying?" He balled up his fists. "Typical. You always think that your actions won't affect other people."

Shen Yuan got the sense that Shang Qinghua was referring to something else, but his mind was starting to get too muddy to think of what. Breathing was getting a little harder. A lot harder.

"Qinghua. A-Hua, please listen to me. C-could you come kneel down next to me? Right here." He waited until Shang Qinghua lowered himself a bit, still frowning, before gently placing his forehead against the other peak lord's. "Listen to me, okay? I know I broke my promise again. But you've found me before and I trust you'll find me again." He said between gasps of air.

"A-Yuan--"

"We've met again and again... and we'll keep meeting. I k-know it." Gasp. Cough. "Beyond all ideas of... right and wrong, there's a field." Vision dimming. Grasp slackening. "I'll be... waiting for you... there."

"A-Yuan?"

"..."

"A-Yuan!?"

"..."

A wail broke through the serenity of the forest.

[dailyfigures]

hiiiiii everyone i'm just popping in to say that i probably won't be online much for a bit, meaning the queue will go on as always but i can't really answer asks much :( will be back on track as soon as i can!