#I do not have another different color of cane

[tehsacredeggo]

Does anyone have any ideas for decorating my very blue very sticker covered cane to make it look like it belongs to a vampire pls I’m begging

[webslinger-holland]

Another Dream | Kaz Brekker

Summary: In which Kaz reveals what his true dream is.

Warning: slight angst...its short...and major fluff near the end

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Fem!Reader

Type: Oneshot

Word Count: 1.9k

The chapel hadn’t sustained much damage from the battle. A few wooden pews ended up getting pushed and overturned. A few shards of glass scattered across the floor from broken windows. Yet, the stainless window remained absolutely untouched. The image of the Saint Sun Summoner cast colorful rays of light onto the stone floor.

At the given moment, Y/n was sitting on the edge of one of the pews. Her eyes remained on the saint in front of her. She had never been the religious type; she often left Inej be the expert in that area. But she found comfort in sitting in the small chapel.

It couldn’t have been more than an hour ago when they almost lost their lives to the shadow monster they encountered in that very room. The crows had done risky jobs in the past, but none of them involved looking death right in the eye like they just did. She was still shaken up from the whole ordeal.

The familiar sound of a cane clicking against the stone floor could be heard behind her. The leader of the crows was making his way down the center aisle of the church, coming to a halt slightly behind the pew she sat in. She did not turn her head to address him.

“Lantsov paid up,” Kaz had come to tell her. “Everyone will get their cut.”

“Good,” Y/n nodded once. She looked over her shoulder, resting a hand on the back of the pew. “And Nina?” 

“She’ll receive a pardon for deserting and another for her Fjerdan. As long as he stays out of trouble, the charges will be dropped.” Kaz explained.

“I’m glad to hear it,” Y/n let out a sigh. She went to turn back around in her place. Her eyes naturally gravitating to the stain glass window once again.

Unbeknownst to her, Kaz began staring at her through the corner of his eyes. He felt his heart tighten in the confines of his chest upon just looking at her. He spent so many years admiring her from a distance, never being able to find the courage to act on the feelings in his heart.

He had known for a very long time that she did not want to stay in Ketterdam. There were too many painful memories to give her reason to stick around. She always loved to travel anyway. She wanted to move west as soon as the opportunity presented itself. Now that the fold had been destroyed and the job was complete, there was nothing preventing her from moving far away.

Just by looking at her, Kaz could tell that her mind was in a different place at the given moment. She was probably already planning about the adventure she’d be on, the journey across the sea, and the exploration of a new land. She’d be thinking about how great it would be to leave Ketterdam behind, along with him. 

Under the notion that the two of them would have very little time left together, Kaz tried being slightly sentimental for once in his life. He racked his brain for something that meant worthwhile and heartfelt.

“I also...” Kaz’s voice trailed off. “Wanted to say goodbye.”

“Oh,” Y/n said sadly. 

“Since I assume you’ll be leaving as soon as you find a ship,” Kaz predicted. She nodded her head at this. “As you should. It’s what you’ve always dreamed about,” Kaz said in an almost harsh tone. It sounded mocking.

“Well, what do you want me to say?” Y/n responded in retort. She spun around in the small wooden pew, staring at him with a strong him of confusion in her eyes. “What would you have me do? Stay in Ketterdam?” Y/n persisted.

In response, Kaz went to turn his head away from her to avoid eye contact at all costs. He wanted nothing more than to slip behind the facade he held, void of all emotions if he could help it. His face was blank as if she hadn’t just expressed the one thing he desired the most. Having her stay in Ketterdam.

“Don’t tell me you’ve never had a dream,” Y/n scoffed at his stone cold expression. She faced forward once more. What followed was a moment of pure silence.

With a haunting past, Kaz Brekker was cursed with torturous nightmares most nights. However, on the rare nights that he had dreams, he always dreamed of her and absolutely nothing else. His imagination would run wild of the endless possibilities they could share together.

In his dreams, Kaz would find himself stroking up and down her bare back with his own hand. There’d be no gloves. No urge to pull away at contact. No memory of his past. It was just the two of them together. 

They would spend hours together in bed. He’d brush her hair away from her neck to grant him access. He’d burrow his face into the crook of her neck, placing the most delicate kisses along her kiss. He loved hearing the sound of her sighs in his dreams. 

He could see it all now. Her body lay underneath his. Her delicate hand trailing up the length of his chest, stopping to linger at his heart. He take her hand in his own and give it a gentle squeeze before leaning down to capture her lips.

His dreams wanted them to be together. He wanted to hold her in his arms and kiss her until she forgot her own name. Being brought back to reality became his nightmare. He came to realize that he’d never be able to have that and his dreams would never come true. His armor was still in place and she’d be leaving soon anyways.

After the moment of silence, Y/n had tilted her head to the side as if she was trying to look at him through her peripheral vision. She grew curious. Her mouth parted to ask a question.

“What is your dream, Kaz Brekker?” Y/n wondered.

Slowly, Y/n turned around in her place. She looked at him expectedly, patiently awaiting for his answer. She quirked her eyebrows to show her curiosity. He studied her face for a moment. He thought about his choice of words, struggling to express his true emotions. 

The old answers came easily to mind. Money. Vengeance. Jordie’s voice in my head silenced forever. But a different reply roared to life inside him, loud, insistent, and unwelcome. You, Y/n. You.

For a second, Kaz opened his mouth, but no words came out of his mouth. He was so close to confessing his true feelings to her. However, the fear quickly overtook him. He resorted to fortifying himself behind his walls again. He quickly tore his gaze away from her.

“To die, buried under the weight of my own gold.” Kaz claimed. 

She faced forward. She felt herself rolling her eyes at his answer, even scoffing under her breath. She couldn’t believe him. 

“More money. More scores to settle,” Y/n deduced. She quickly rose to her feet, which only took him by surprise. She went to approach him. “Was there never another dream?” Y/n tried one final time.

The silence to follow was enough reason to leave. She went to brush past him with the intent of walking away and never looking back. But as she began to walk away from him, Kaz reached out to grab onto her wrist. He stopped her.

“Stay,” Kaz pleaded. His voice was rough stone. “Stay in Ketterdam. Stay with me.”

Slowly, Y/n shifted her body to face him She briefly glanced down at the gloved hand which held her wrist captive. Her gaze shifted back to the look of desperation in his eyes, silently pleading for her to stay for his own sake. She could feel the tears begin to gather in the corners of her eyes.

“What would be the point?” Y/n whispered. She shook her head at the notion.

He only drew closer to her. He refused to look away from her now, knowing that if he did, he might lose her forever. He took a breath. 

“I want you to,” Kaz confessed truthfully. He saw the look in her eyes change slightly. She was taken back by this. He needed to make himself clearer. “I want...I want...you,” Kaz confirmed.

The two of them didn’t seem to realize how close they had gotten to one another. Their chests were pressed together and they were able to feel another’s breath fanning their faces. Either of them had been so close to anyone before. 

With great hesitation, Y/n had lifted her head to stare directly into those brilliant green eyes. She felt the tears streaming down the slides of her cheeks. She shook her head at his words.

“And how will you have me?” Y/n wondered in a soft whisper. “Gloves on? Fully clothed? With your head turned so our lips never--” but she was never able to finish that sentence.

Because the rest of her words were lost against his mouth. He had grabbed her face with his two gloved hands and pulled her into a captivating kiss. He kept his eyes squeezed shut so tightly as if he was trying to silence the voices in his head. He felt sparks of lightning tingling against his lips, knowing his mind was screaming for him to pull away. But he didn’t want to.

Yet, he kissed her so gently and carefully in fear of losing her forever. He felt her body begin to relax in his grasp. She gripped the lapels of his black trench coat, pulling him harder against her if that was even possible. His arms had shifted to circle around her waist, gathering her body against him.

A hint of pressure only caused a most delicate hum to escape past her lips, muffled against his mouth. If he could bottle the sound and get drunk on it every night, he would have without question. Their lips moved together in a synchronized harmony as if they were two puzzle pieces made to fit together.

The kiss had brought a newfound sense of warmth and comfort to his old stone heart. The memories of his brother, which were often brought from contact, hadn’t plagued his mind. He focused on the feeling the softness of her lips, how she tasted, and how she felt agains him. 

She couldn't believe what was happening. Even she had dreamed about what it would be like to touch him, but never so far as kiss him. He tasted like the expensive liquor from his flask, which he always kept in his coat pocket. His lips moved compellingly against hers as if they were fighting to persuade her to stay. And it was working.

With great reluctance, their lips parted ever so slightly from one another. Their breath held without thinking. The suspense in the air was caught at the top of their throats. 

The two of them had leaned forward to rest their heads against one another’s. They panted softly to regain their breath. They remained so close to one another that their noses brushed against each others. They stare down at each other’s lips, tempted to continue.

“You...” Kaz panted. He brought a hand up to cup her cheek lovingly, staring into the depths of her eyes. “You are my dream. You always have been.”

Upon hearing those words, Y/n felt any tension leave her body and she finally relaxed. She felt a small smile growing at the corners of her lips. She closed her eyes to savor those precious little words.

“Stay with me,” Kaz pleaded one last time. He nudged his nose against hers as if trying to persuade her and it was working. “Stay for me, my dear.” Kaz whispered.

She had never heard him speak so desperately. Though he was a master at crafting a lie, she knew him well enough to know that he’d never lie about his feelings. He wanted her and he was asking her to stay with him. 

Her eyes glanced between his own and his mouth. “I’ll stay...for you,” Y/n agreed.

Upon hearing this, Kaz felt like his dreams had finally come true. He inclined his face towards hers so that he could lay his lips against her own once again. He pulled her body as close to his as humanly possible, now knowing that he’d never have to let go. She was finally his.

[undreaming-fanfiction]

Thinking of a modern AU when the kids get to be kids after it's all over and they go to the movies, they play games, hang out, all that. And of course, Steve drives them everywhere. He vouches for them in front of their parents, watches them like a hawk, tries to tell them about the adult stuff he's learned so far and chases Robin and Nancy to give them info on uni application and the things he feels he's too dumb for. Still, when Robin and Nancy are away and one of his kids needs something, he'll grab that legal document and either stare at it long enough to get a migraine or begins hounding the smart people who stayed in Hawkins (Mr. Clarke is Steve's go-to person and Mr. Clarke won't say it, but he's so proud of Harrington's progress).

So, Steve's life is basically nonstop work and babysitting (with lots of complaints and grumbling from the teens), they ask him to drive them somewhere and he'll bitch about it, sure, but he will get up after 4 hours of sleep and do it anyways. Dustin often reprimands Steve for not taking care of his health, but he doesn't see why.

When Encanto comes out, El really, really wants to see it, and how can Steve say no to her? He drives the whole gang to the movie theatre (some of them stacked on top of each other, some in the trunk on a pile of blankets) and decides to join them. He doesn't really like animated stuff, but Robin loves these movies and he wants yet another reason to call her and talk through the night.

He didn't expect to enjoy the movie so much, but it's colorful and catchy. The songs are nice and the characters are relatable. He makes a lot of mental notes to discuss with Robin. He thinks she will love Mirabel.

And then "Surface Pressure" starts playing and Steve wonders why he suddenly feels like crying. "I'm pretty sure I'm worthless if I can't be of service" hits especially hard. He's just sitting there and feeling incredibly stupid for tearing up at flying glitter-covered donkeys.

When they leave the movie theater, everyone is pretty excited and discussing which characters and songs they liked the most (even if some feel like rolling their eyes at a kids' movie, El's excitement stops them from doing that). They all start discussing to who they relate the most, El feels with Mirabel for being left out and different, even if she actually is the only one who has a gift, Will dares to utter that he really sympathizes with Dolores, Dustin loves Bruno for trying to fix the cracks in Casita.

And then they turn to Steve and someone makes a jab at him, saying he resembles Mariano the most. Steve is ready to shrug it off, there's some truth in that with what happened to his relationship with Nancy, but El just shakes her head and says: "No. Steve is our Luisa."

Everyone goes silent. There's a lot of hmmming and "well, he did get up to drive us when he had a night shift..." and "we could have just biked...". Steve tries to make them feel better about it, joking that he really has nothing better to do, but the drive home is full of whispering, and the party actually diligently thank him when they leave his car.

The next day is Sunday and Steve is ready for his usual routine, making himself busy until someone needs something. But there's a knock on the door to his small apartment and when he opens it, he sees his group of kids, proudly presenting a tray of muffins and two cartons of orange juice.

Out of all of them, it's Mike who speaks up. "Nancy said you often forget to eat breakfast," he states in his usual annoyed tone. "She also said that you like chocolate muffins, so we are here to ensure you don't die from hunger. Now move, I'll get the glasses and plates."

Steve just watches in awe as they swarm his flat, Will smiling at him and producing a DVD of the latest Spider-man movie. "This one was a tip from Robin, she says you haven't seen it yet."

Max is standing in the kitchenette with her cane, watching the pile of meds Steve has to take after his injuries with disdain. "This has to take forever for you to find what you need. Don't argue, I remember how shitty it was for me. Let me help you build a chart and thank me later."

El and Lucas are rearranging Steve's couch and placing pillows in front of the TV so everyone can sit comfortably. El also ensures the blinds are closed so Steve's eyes don't have to fight against the light.

And if that all wasn't more care than Steve has known in years, Dustin grabs his elbow and sits him down, threatening him with violence if he even thinks about working on Sunday.

As the opening titles start, Steve is surrounded by six teenagers in his tiny and cheap flat, chewing on a subpar muffin with an orange juice that probably never saw the actual fruit, and he thinks that there's no greater happiness than this.

[saszor]

Hi!

I absolutely adore your artworks :"3 It makes me so happy to see the real variety of people represented in art. I was wondering if you have any tips for drawing people with albinism. I'm practicing drawing such characters, and right now I'm afraid they may be missing something important.

Thank you!

So first thing would be to figure out what kind of albinism they have since there are multiple (most people don't know that). There is the type that affects the skin and eyes and everything but there is another that only affects eyes, etc. But assuming you want to draw a character with oculocutaneous albinism (affects eyes and skin and hair), even it has types. The "classic" one you see in art is type 1, where everything is Really White. But type 3 results in red hair and brown skin, and it's still oculocutaneous albinism. Type 2 can result in blonde or brown hair. It's a spectrum and you should consider that when choosing to give your character albinism. Though there is no type that results in purple or bright red eyes in humans. That's a result of bright light.

Another thing that people also generally don't know is that albinism results in blindness or low vision. Your character with albinism is probably a Disabled Person. Look up white canes (and the different types), guide dogs (and miniature horses, they do exist), show them reading a book in braille if you're feeling wild

The more visible the character's albinism is, the more issues they will have. If your character has paper white skin, give them sunglasses for the photophobia they have and some nice long clothes so that they don't burn in the sun. When their eyes are visible, give them nystagmus and/or strabismus.

In this case 95% of accuracy is just Reading About the Thing rather than anything drawing-specific since coloring is pretty self-explanatory and the rest are common eye conditions. Just don't be afraid to make your characters blind in an actually realistic way and do your research etc

[blindbeta]

Why Writers Should Consider Giving Blind Characters Canes, Guide Animals, or Other Mobility Aids + How To Choose One

(Note: This post is admittedly long and full of information. Make use of the headings to read the parts you are interested in. I have provided many links, which you can read as you go or save for later. I suggest saving this post and taking your time with it. I am also willing to answer any questions for people who have difficulty reading long posts. While I considered breaking this post into parts, I decided to keep all the information in one place for ease of sharing and reference, especially because multiple sections of the post refer to other sections contained within it.)

When I read for blind characters, my most common suggestion for writers is to give their character a cane, guide animal, or utilize another mobility aid. Most stories I beta read feature totally blind characters or people with very little vision, such as only seeing colors. Despite this, it is extremely common for me to suggest giving them a cane or guide animal because they are rarely portrayed using mobility devices. Because this is such a common suggestion, I wanted to create a post about it.

Most of this will be about mobility aids for people who aren’t familiar with them or are still deciding what tools are best for their character. It will also be mostly for modern, realistic, or semi-realistic stories. I will create a separate post for fantasy and science fiction mobility aids, use of magic or magical items, and writing stories set in or inspired by times before formal mobility tools existed. However, I believe this post can benefit anyone who is writing a blind character or anyone who wants to learn more about blindness. Mobility tools are a big part of blind culture, blind communities, diversity of blind experiences, and accessibility.

Learn About Mobility Aids

Here is a comprehensive post by visually impaired fiction writer and blogger @mimzy-writing-online which contains information about canes, O&M, guide animals, etc. If you are not familiar with canes, start there. It contains helpful information for body language, use of canes, and resources for descriptions that any writer will find valuable. The post also has a section on guide animals and sighted guide.

Here is a post I made about crafting fictional guide animals, although I have no experience as a guide animal handler myself. I made sure to research and include links, so it should still be a good starting point. It also has information about differences between service animals and emotional support animals.

Sighted Guide / Human Guide

First, terminology discussion. Sighted guide is a more common term and more examples come up when I search this term. Sighted guide refers to when a person with vision helps guide a blind person. The guide can be abled or also blind themselves. I have guided my friends before and they have guided me. I have often said that, in a way, sighted guide is a misnomer because someone who has less vision or no vision can also guide someone with more vision just as well.

The term human guide makes up for this misnomer by being more accurate. A TikTok by AskABlindPerson or @askablindperson on tumblr, explains this well. Here is a link to the video. The video states the following:

“I’m blind and I definitely prefer to say human guide rather than sighted guide because you don’t inherently need vision to guide and a blind person can do it too. And it doesn’t have to be that the blind person who’s guiding has more vision than the other person either. It can just be that they know the area better than the person they’re guiding, or it could be that they just have better cane skills or independent travel skills than the other person. Because not everybody has equal access to the same exact opportunities for training. So a blind person can also guide, which is why I like to say human guide because it’s more inclusive.”

Not everyone minds which term is used, however. Some people also only use one term because it was taught to them first, rather than because of any particular meaning.

Below are some examples of sighted / human guide and when it is often used.

Here is an article titled How to be a Sighted Guide

Here is another helpful page with information on certain situations such as narrow spaces.

Here is a video by London Vision.

While human guide can be someone’s main mobility aid, it is often used according to the situation.

Situations in which your character might want to use sighted guide include:

-crowds, where a cane might be difficult to use or someone has a companion they would like to avoid being separated from

-while in lines, mostly to provide descriptions of what happens around them or to let them know when to move forward in the line

-ground that is uneven or steep may cause someone to want to use sighted guide rather than a cane, although this will depend on the person. Using a guide and a cane is also possible. A guide animal may go around the obstacle

-when going inside an unfamiliar house or indoor location, usually for locating a specific room

-navigating unfamiliar areas

-public transport

-guide animal handlers may choose to either do traditional sighted / human guide while using the guide animal or give the command for their animal to follow the person without holding onto them

Guides allow the blind person to gain additional information about their surroundings through conversation with the guide. Human guides can also aid in navigation by providing helpful directions or landmarks. Human guides can be used with a white cane or guide animal. They can also be used without any other mobility aid.

People from cultures who place high value on interdependence, especially on family, may wish to use more human guides. People who have anxiety or disorientation may prefer to use human guides or simply travel with someone else for security. Other people who might tend to use more human guides include: people who have moved to an unfamiliar area, people who are losing vision, people who have recently become blind, people with other disabilities or health concerns, or people who prefer the company of others.

In stories, human guides can portray character relationships, establishing trust and respect. Perhaps a character already knows how to guide, showing familiarity with blindness. This mobility tool can display the helpfulness of a stranger or be the start of a meet-cute. Additionally, showing how good or bad a character is at guiding can show compatibility between characters. I also believe that writing guides into a story can allow for detailed visual descriptions or conversation between your characters.

Imagine character A slowly learning to trust character B, culminating in letting that character be a human guide.

Sonar Devices

I wanted to include a section for these because they aren’t often discussed.

Sonar devices are intended as a supplement for use of a cane or guide animal. Unless the sonar and cane are paired together, such as with the WeWalk cane. While they could be used by themselves, this should probably only be with the addition of a guide and in non-crowded, familiar area.

Here is a video review of the Sunu Band by TheBlindLife.

Here is another review comparing two devices: the Sunu Band and the Buzz Clip.

Note how the devices are used, especially with a cane. The cane is used to detect objects from the waist below, whereas the sonar device is used to detect objects above the waist. This includes objects like tree branches.

Sonar devices work by detecting objects in front of the user and giving a tactile alert, such as a vibration. Vibrations increase the closer one gets to the object, giving a continuous vibration when right in front of it. Moving away from the object, such as stepping to the side, will stop the vibration.

This device could allow blind characters to be more active an create interesting opportunities for descriptions.

Why Does My Character Need a Cane, Guide Animal, or Human Guide?

A few reasons include:

1. It will be more relatable for blind audiences if characters move through the world like they do

2. It is more realistic for stories set in our world or worlds meant to be realistic save for a few elements

3. It allows audiences who aren’t blind to understand how blind people move through the world. In the case of sighted guide, it also offers depictions of politely and efficiently offering help to a blind person, which may include not offering help at all.

4. Canes and guide animals give your blind character some visibility, as the cane, and to some extent the guide animal and harness, signify to others that a character is blind or otherwise disabled in some way. As for sighted / human guide, it offers an extra voice for advocacy purposes or the added visibility that someone is being helped.

5. Mobility tools allow blind people to participate more in a world that is rarely accessible for them at a basic level. I almost always find this is true in books as well unless the writer makes a point to include universal design.

6. Mobility aids improve navigation, increase safety, and increase interaction with the world.

Why Would Anyone Need To Know My Character is Blind?

Safety is a big factor.

In this video titled Using A White Cane While Legally Blind by Cayla With a C, Cayla discusses some of the benefits of using a white cane. One of these is that the cane works as an identifier, letting people know the person using it can’t see so other people need to watch out for them. She mentions it is also important for cars and bikers to know cane users can’t see them well or at all, meaning they don’t expect a cane user to move out of the way.

Both Cayla and Molly Burke share in their videos that people are more likely to offer help when they use a cane.

How Do Mobility Aids Help Blind People Navigate?

It depends on what mobility aid is used.

Canes offer more tactile information and direct contact with the environment. Canes allow someone to feel changes in the ground, such as going from carpet to tile. They make it easier to feel steps or broken sidewalk. They allow blind people to be aware of obstacles, such as a chair, rather than simply going around them they way they might with a guide dog. They help blind people locate landmarks they need in order to be oriented in their environment and navigate their way to different places. For example, they may search for a bench, knowing a drinking fountain is across from it.

As for guide animals, because I am not a guide animal handler myself, I wanted to include quotes from a few sources.

The Guide Dog Foundation says the following in a very useful Q&A:

“In short, guide dogs are taught how to find and follow a clear path, maneuver around obstacles, and stop at curbs. They follow their teammate's directions, and they know that they can disobey only in the face of danger.”

And according to International Guide Dog Federation:

“A guide dog is trained to guide its owner in a straight line unless ordered otherwise. The dog will avoid any obstacles en route, above or around you. It will stop at stairs, doors and kerbs. The dog will not decide where to go; it is up to the vision impaired person to instruct the dog on the direction for the dog to go and the dog will safely guide the person as instructed. The vision impaired person will already be familiar with regularly travelled routes and the dog will quickly become familiar with these too.”

And International Association of Assistance Dog Partnership has a page that explains the categories of tasks performed by guide dogs, as well as other types of assistance dogs.

Sighted / human guide can be used with a family member, friend, or helpful stranger. It can be a primary mode of O&M or used when needed, meaning it be used even if someone already has a cane or a guide animal.

Usually, human guide involves contact with the guide. It can also include the guide orienting the person they are leading by describing surroundings such as “there is a bench to the right” or “we’re near the door” or it can involve telling someone where steps are.

How Do I Know What My Character Should Use?

What your character chooses will depend on their lifestyle, level of vision, age, where they live, culture, religion, and their needs as a blind person.

In the post on guide animals, I went over a few reasons someone might choose a guide dog or a guide horse.

Here are some articles about canes vs guide animals. Although the ones I found focus on dogs, I believe many points made about guide animals can be applied to miniature horses as well.

Guide Dogs vs White Canes: The Comprehensive Comparison

The link above includes the following:

“One of the biggest and most obvious differences between a guide dog and white cane is that a guide dog is trained to avoid obstacles along their pathway. A white cane helps locate impediments so that the blind person can decide how best to maneuver around them.”

Another article that may help:

White Cane vs Guide Dog: Why or Why Not?

White Canes and Guide Dogs - What’s Actually the Difference?

Here are some videos:

Guide Dog vs Canes - Pros and Cons by Molly Burke

White Canes vs Guide Dogs by Challenge Solutions

White Canes vs Guide Dogs - Which is Better? 21 Pros and Cons by Unsightly Opinions

Guide Dog vs Cane, Which is better? by Ashley’s Advice

I also wanted to discuss a few more points.

1. Multiple disabilities

People with multiple disabilities may prefer different methods. For example, those who use a stabilizing cane may have different reasons for choosing their mobility aid. I went into that more in this post here.

It would be difficult to cover all other disabilities here, but I will attempt to include some things to consider.

Consider any pain, weakness, or other difficulties your character may have around their hands, wrists, arms. Canes require repetitive use of these areas.

Consider any sensory issues your character has. Sensory issues may come into play with cane vibration and the tactile information given by canes, especially as it differs between surfaces. The video by Challenge Solutions listed above discusses pain caused by vibration and repetitive movement, for someone who already deals with this. It goes into more detail, mentioning that a dog may lessen this difficulty compared to cane use.

Consider phobias or traumas that may make service animals, especially dogs, a bad choice for the character, their loved ones, or community. In contrast, consider how a service animal may help provide comfort to characters with traumas unrelated to animals

I hope that provides a starting point for thinking about how other disabilities may impact someone’s choice when deciding what mobility aid is right for them. I hope this is helpful is choosing a mobility aid for your character.

2. Financial Considerations

Consider financial difficulties. While guide dog schools often provide highly trained dogs, weeks of training, a harness, and some essentials for free, it depends on the school. Some schools may cover the dog’s veterinary care, while others may not. Some may provide one bag of food. Some may cover costs of transportation to the training school, but may not cover the cost of missed work. Challenge Solutions lists several costly areas that go with having a dog, such as grooming or toys.

The amount the training schools cover is so varied that one cannot assume anything about how the blind person keeps up with care of their dog. They may have trained with a school that covers the most costly things, leaving them to buy the occasional treats and toys, while other schools may not cover much after the dogs and handler leave the school, causing financial difficulties that may or may not have been fully anticipated. Financial situations of blind people with guide animals cannot be reliably assumed.

Canes, on the other hand, are a one-time payment per cane, if they aren’t already free. While canes do require replacement tips and while people do go through canes quickly, the cost is not comparable to that of caring for a guide animal.

For writers, it may make sense to have your fictional world contain schools that continue to cover costs over the guide animal’s life. Or perhaps veterinary care is free in that world. Either way, this may be something to consider. The character’s financial situation can show a lot about them and the world in which they live.

3. Additional thoughts about safety and discrimination

Safety has many different connotations in blind communities. Some people consider safety to mean social safety, as alerting others to blindness may explain any behavior that would be considered strange or rude.

Some consider safety to mean physical safety from tripping, falling, running into objects or people, or having them run into you. This is especially important with vehicles.

Still others consider safety to mean being able to navigate and orient oneself, such as when traveling alone.

Some people consider safety to mean interpersonal safety and the fear of being harmed due to being perceived as vulnerable.

Molly Burke mentions this particular subject at around 19:22 to 20:47 in her video here. To paraphrase, she says that having a big dog with her makes her feel safer as a blind person. Molly states that the white cane may increase her vulnerability as it identifies her as a potential target due to her blindness.

I mentioned that it is helpful for people to be identified as blind, such as with a cane and, to a lesser extent, a guide dog. That is still true. This may provide protection by alerting others that they may need to look out for a blind person instead of expecting that person to avoid them or their vehicle.

On the other side, a cane may alert others to vulnerability in a way that is harmful to the blind person. Due to this factor, blind people may feel safer with a guide dog because the presence of a dog may make others hesitate before doing them harm. I am not sure if the same can be said for those with horses, but it is possible horses may still act as a deterrent. In the video by Challenge Solutions, Caitlyn says that while guide dogs are not trained to be guard dogs and should not be aggressive by nature, it can feel safer to travel with a guide dog. Caitlyn says the following: “They are dogs and I would like to think that they would have a protective instinct if a situation arose where that was needed.” She adds, “I think there is more of a protective aspect to guide dog usage than white cane usage. At least I always felt a lot safer with my dog than I do with my cane.”

I also wanted to include thoughts about discrimination.

Some blind people may worry they will experience more discrimination using one mobility aid over another. This may influence their decision. To give brief examples, people with service animals may be turned away from places they are allowed to go. They may need to advocate for themselves more because of this. Another example might be feeling like people judge them or stare at them more when they use a white cane. They may be grabbed or shouted at more often when using a white cane, as described by Challenge Solutions, or they may be ignored or go unnoticed in other cases. In fact, some blind people are only spoken to in public because of guide dogs acting as a conversation starter.

However, feeling invisible in society seems to be a common issue for many disabled people. Some people also talk about being invisible in some areas and uncomfortably visible in other areas. While a blind person’s choice of mobility aid may influence this, the common disabled experience of both invisibility and hyper-visibility might still follow them.

Additionally, myths about blindness, which I wrote about in this post here, may also cause people to accuse cane users of faking if they have residual vision, which can lead to them feeling unsafe or like they cannot use their residual vision without receiving negative attention. This may cause some people to want a service animal, as in the case of a guide dog, some people may assume they are simply walking their dog or training a guide dog. This may be a way some blind people try to avoid being accused of faking blindness. However, blind people with guide animals may also be accused of having a fake service animal or be accused of not really needing their service animal. Additional barriers may include general public ignorance about laws around service animals or differing laws around access per country.

All of the above can put a lot of strain on people who are just trying to get from point A to point B.

Sighted guide may come with some issues as well. Finding someone who is willing to guide and a helpful guide may be challenging unless a blind person is already using a trusted friend or family member. In social situations, other people may misunderstand use of human guide, believing that they should address the guide rather than the blind person. Use of this mobility aid may also come with judgment from others about the blind person being incapable, lazy, or a burden on others. None of these are true, but they can be judgments people make.

Sighted / human guide may be a preferred form of O&M for people who have recently gone blind or are in unfamiliar areas. Additionally, blind people who come from cultures where interdependence is valued may prefer to use a human guide with or without another mobility aid. It is also important to note that the nature of the blind community also celebrates both interdependence and dependence, and these may not always mean the same thing as they do to people who aren’t blind. This is also true when it comes to using mobility tools and techniques.

What Should My Low Vision Character Use?

The majority of blind people have some residual vision, including low vision. Which is part of why most of the blind community doesn’t use canes, along with lack of training. Unfortunately, many people with residual vision are, however subtly, turned away from using canes or other mobility aids. Based on stories from friends, suggestions in this post by @mimzy-writing-online, my own experience, and information online, I will suggest a few reasons this might be the case.

A big reason has to do with believing they have too much vision to require a mobility aid. The idea of not being disabled enough is both an internal an external issue for people with residual vision. This is because people often claim that if a person can see some, they must not require mobility aid. Mobility aids are seen as a last resort, rather than a way to make life easier. This can lead to self-doubt, confusion, or guilt for a blind person. They might feel as if they are ungrateful because they believe other people have it worse. Conversely, some people may have been taught that relying on a mobility tool is shameful, giving up, or reveals a lack of independence. And sadly, some blind people with residual vision may be afraid of rejection or standing out from others.

This leads me into another reason, which is: believing they will experience more discrimination or social exclusion when using a cane. Unfortunately, this can be true. However, it is also true to that not using a cane can cause others to judge someone for things they do or don’t do as a blind person.

Disclosure is an option that works for many. However, blind people cannot always disclose to everyone they interact with, such as to strangers spotting them outside. Disclosure of blindness can also be fraught with accusations of not really being blind, not looking blind, or not being blind enough to count as blind. These accusations sometimes happen when using canes as well. Denial of help, denial of accommodations, and accusations of faking are common.

In some circumstances, the opposite can happen. Instead of being accused of faking, the choice to use a mobility aid might bring about helpfulness from strangers or concern from loved ones. There may be concern that the vision loss has progressed or that something is wrong. After all, suddenly using a mobility tool can inspire alarm in people who aren’t used to them, because the prevailing thought is that mobility tools are only for totally blind people. And the incorrect message behind this is that being totally blind is negative.

Characters choosing to start using a mobility tool could ease themselves and loved ones into it by being open about their plans. They could experiment with cane use, marginally increasing use over time. Or they could simply use a cane as often as they need to, addressing concerns as they are brought up. Portrayal of communication about mobility aids between a blind character and their family could be a lovely addition to a story.

Lastly, blind people are expected to rely on residual vision for as long as possible, in as many situations as possible. Even if it causes pain, disorientation, or anxiety. Even if seeing is exhausting or frustrating. Even if it isn’t safe. However, the other side of this is that many blind people with residual vision enjoy seeing colors or shapes. They may enjoy being able to describe things to friends with less vision.

But their sight may not always be enough to forgo using a mobility tool safely.

It is my opinion that anyone on the blind spectrum or with declining vision can benefit from use of accessibility tools, whether it be learning Braille or training with a cane.

People with low vision can use canes when they feel it is necessary. Examples may include times where they may need extra visibility or extra contact with the ground as they walk. They may choose to use a cane when crossing the street for added safety. Same applies to using stairs. They may bring their cane only to unfamiliar environments or out with them at night. They might feel like using it one day or in one place and not the next. They may have a condition that is not stable from day to day. Overcast weather or dim lighting could make it necessary to pull out a cane. They could simply want to use their cane or decide to leave it at home because they felt like it.

A blind person does not need to a full-time cane-user to be allowed to use one. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing. If they need it, they need it. It is that simple. It will be the same with your low vision character.

Characters may also switch up mobility tools depending on what is best for where they’re going and what is accessible to them. For example, someone may use a human guide for extra safety while in a new city.

Why I Want More Mobility Aids in Media

This is just my opinion, but I would like to see more characters using mobility aids blind people use in real life. This helps to normalize use of these tools for people who are not familiar with blindness. This allows blind people representation that is more true to life. It also adds more detail to stories that wouldn’t otherwise be there.

There is also something off about blind characters who don’t use anything, specifically because most portrayals of blindness involve characters who are totally blind. Why are these characters walking around absolutely everywhere with no familiar way to navigate? Why are tools used by the blind community rejected when it comes to stories about blind characters?

I suspect it is because of a few factors:

1. Not knowing how mobility aids work. Another deterrent could be the difficulties of research and, in live-action media, wanting to avoid training usually sighted actors in use of these mobility tools.

2. Not wanting the blind character to seem too hindered

3. Wanting the mobility aid to be cooler or more interesting if it does exist. This varies by genre and the period in which the piece of media is set.

I find it strange that most stories about blind people do not feature blind characters using tools or techniques blind people use in real life. It sometimes feels as if blindness is a decoration writers add to their story without thinking about how it would impact their character.

My suggestion is to consider the amount of vision your character has, along with their lifestyle, and choose a mobility tool that works for them. I know that some of you are writing characters who can technically move through life without using a mobility aid full time. In these cases, it would be fun to see characters who are transient mobility aid users.

Closing - Not Everything About Blindness is Difficult

I hope this post was informative. I know that some of it may feel contradictory in nature, but that seems to be part of diversity of experience people have with mobility aids. Not everything has to be true for your character or will be true to their experience. Additionally, don’t feel pressure to portray the difficult aspects of mobility aids or being blind in public spaces; it is good to have stories where blind characters are treated well by everyone. There are days when blind people have nothing but lovely interactions with others and when safety is not a concern.

While I mentioned some negative aspects of being blind in this post, there are many positives as well. This can include opportunities to meet new people and have conversations. This can mean getting the chance to use cool gadgets other people don’t get to use. It can also mean being able to experience the world in unique and fun ways, such as noticing little details about the world. It can mean appreciating colors, lights, smells, sounds, or sensations. It can also mean cool navigation tools and techniques.

I will post a part 2 soon. It will include information for writers of science fiction, fantasy, and stories set in historical times. As always, if anyone has anything feel free to share. I will add any responses here as edits to this post.

If you found this post helpful, my pinned post has many more links. I accept asks or messages with questions. I also offer beta reading for blind characters.

-BlindBeta

[devdirt]

Hollow Knight vs. Vivziepop character design language

I know it's kind of a wildcard comparison but Vivziepop is a fan of Hollow Knight and its designs. I wanted to explore how shape language, color usage and storytelling in design are used in both properties.

NPC designs do a great job at telling you the character's personality or occupation without being overly detailed. One well placed trait does wonders, like Cornifer with his bundles of maps or Tuk and her hoarding, scrap salvaging hobbies. Paired with the world it tells two people doing their best to survive their dying realm, one by mapping out the twists and turns and the other by scraping up whatever she can find from abandoned civilization.

Now when we look at visual storytelling in Hazbin there are some good details! Alastor's outfit design and trademark microphone give you old timey host vibes right away. Niffty (my angel) sports a poodle skirt, kerchief around her neck and apron, also telling you her occupation and time period she's likely from. Everyone in this show has a big toothy grin but hers plays well into her hyperactive and always happy personality.

But there are also really poor moments of character storytelling. Everything about Beelzebub has already been said. She doesn't read as gluttony, she doesn't read as a bee, and she doesn't read as an animal tamer. When I look at her I see every other wolf character Viv has ever done. If Jayjay is party wolf and Loona is goth wolf then Beelzebub is lava lamp wolf.

The sins are mostly misses for me. They don't read as their sins or their circus related occupations. Asmodeus has fire powers but doesn't read as fire spinner. Mammon doesn't give off greed at ALL but the jester look works (which is also wrong because he's a CLOWN apparently, not a jester.) And don't get me started on this one.

This is not Lucifer.

Nothing about this reads angel, devil or even pride. This design goes all in on the ringmaster design, which is great for the circus theme! But the apple on the hat is the closest we get to this being Lucifer. I didn't even notice the snake on his hat because it looks like a worm for the apple, and they both cover the crown.

Add a second apple on the cane. Okay, so we know for sure this is supposed to be Lucifer but...why? It's another Beelzebub moment where you're left wondering why the design went in this direction. "Apple" shouldn't be the only giveaway here for the most important man in the world these stories are being told in.

Now let's see the celestial leader of Hollow Knight.

That is a god.

Removing all story context, this is incredibly quick to read. Large wings, all white, glowing yellow eyes and a crown. It looks celestial and it doesn't even need color, which is the point!

Now lets view them both within their stories. Is there visual storytelling when compared to other characters and the world around then?

Hollownest is a dark world where every character is dully colored. The Radiance and her power stick out with a glow, juxtaposing themselves with the dark as the light.

Lucifer does not look any different than most of the Hazbin cast. He has all the red, the same sharp toothed grin, the same body type as 90% of the cast of both Hazbin and Helluva Boss. If you lined him up with everyone else somebody like Asmodeus would be chosen as the obvious leader of Hell with his stature and power in the design alone.

Simplicity can tell an entire story while overextending your designs can muddy it.

Hollow Knight relies on few details and minimal storytelling yet it weaves a tale of an usurped kingdom and a god fighting for revenge. You are void, the world is dull, and god is bright and beautiful and terrifying to your way of life.

Vivziepop wants to weave a complex tale but utterly fails to do so with her designs. I purposely did not bring up Cherri Bomb, Sir Pentious or Stolas' designs since they have elements that were taken from other people and properties. I wanted to focus on what she made with her own hands, and when I narrow it down I do not see the story being told or even what side some characters are supposed to be on. Adam and the exterminators look the same as any demon. The leaders of Hell mostly sink into the ocean of overdone details. When everybody is trying so hard to stand out nobody stands out.

[radioisntdead]

(To maybe save our hearts from the angst, how about a cuter idea? could be any gender really and be seen as platonic or not just very vague fluffy fun)

A reader who is similar age to Susan and is the opposite type of old person, a gentle Grandparent who has old person candies at all times. Most importantly however is the only one who can calm Susan's feral chihuahua energy, only when they need to of course.

They play cribbage on weekends, and definitely both chat about the youngins- maybe playfully feud on which is better Knit or Crochet

Good evening my dear! This is a little shorter then I wanted but I did write it in a hair salon, where at the time of posting I'm still in.

Bitter and sweet

Warnings!!!

Cannibalism, Reader is GN but gives off old lady grandma vibes, this is written in little drabbles mainly because I wrote them in an hair salon

Susan had a neighbor, she lived to the left of her house, while Susan's house was more stale and strict appearing her neighbor's was more soft colors, with gnomes outside and a lovely garden filled with all types of hell's flora,

You'd think the two would be at odds but they got along well, going out for tea each day, on weekends they'd go to bingo or play a game of cribbage, although they did get into tiffs about what was better between crochet and knitting, like how crochet is easier for some to pick up with the sole hook, or how knitting uses less yarn then crochet, They were dear friends, and this is some tidbits with them.

You and Susan had opposing aesthetics but that didn't stop the two of you from matching outfits in some way or another, she wore her usual pinkish dress? You were two feet away from her in more brighter attire.

"Kids these days are getting more and more foolish each day, fucking crying in the middle of the streets!"

Susan said, sat on a bench looking across the street at some poor cannibal gal sobbing as her dearest assumingly ended things

When you didn't respond she looked over at you only to see that you were gone,

"Where the hell- [Name]!"

You had dashed over to the gal, swatting at her former lover with your handfan, scolding him for breaking things off in the middle of the streets inside of somewhere private or inside a restaurant as the girl sobbed into your arms,

"Shh, it's alright you deserve better, someone with manners!"

You said patting her back, glaring at the unmannered former lover while Susan groaned from her seat, you just had to butt into other people's business didn't you!

Like she didn't do the same at times.

......

"You uncultured, red-40 looking, bad dental hygiene, modern technology radio man!"

Susan raised her cane to the Radio Deer man, you had just entered Rosie's Emporium for a snack,

"Susan! No! That is terribly rude!"

You shouted dashing over quickly before Susan could do anything, pushing down her cane, while apologizing,

"My apologies! I'll escort her out, here buy yourself something tasty"

You said taking the radio demons hand and placing some money and a few pieces of candy into it before linking an arm with Susan and taking her outside while scolding her as she grumbled, leaving the Radio demon lowkey stunned and missing his mother.

You were how he imagined she would've been if she lived to be elderly.

.....

"For fuck's sake! Why are you in my house?"

Susan shouted as she walked into her kitchen only to see you adorned in an old lady apron chopping away at some vegetables while some type of meat simmered on the stove,

"Making us lunch obviously! I have news about that lovely gal we met on the street a few months ago! She's going steady with my nephew, the one with the good job not the one that's married, and I must tell you what her scandalous ex lover had to say-"

You rambled on, mixing up slang from different decades Susan could care less about the gal who was sobbing on the streets but you seemed to hellbent on telling her about the 'tea' as you called it.

.....

"Susie, let's listen to what the princess has to say before booing her off the stage, this is why she called you an old bitch''

You said linking an arm with Susan before shouting over at Charlie as Rosie pulled her aside,

"My apologies!"

You chased down Charlie at a later date to give her some candies for her troubles with Susan,

You paid visits to the hotel after that, bringing treats for the residents.

....

"Knitting is superior, it uses less yarn then your hook, knitting takes far more skill and that little crochet thing seems easier.''

Susan said knitting a scarf as you sat across from her, crocheting a net.

"Susie, you are my dearest friend and I love you, But I can and will surplex you into a wall if you say that again."

Hearing that while you wore the sweetest smile would strike fear into the average sinner.

......

"Are we thinking barbecue? Grilled? Perhaps baked? Oo I recently picked up some new seasonings we could try!"

You shouted over to Susan as you threw a net at an exorcist pulling them down and stabbing them with an angelic weapon before discarding them to the side to harvest their wings later,

"I don't give a donkeys ass as long as they taste good!"

.....

"Susie?"

"Hm?"

"I'm dying again."

"Don't be dramatic!''

She smacked you gently on the head with her cane as you broke out in laughter, angel wing in your hand and gold around your mouth.

Good evening folks! I am actively dangling Susan around like a keychain, I should invest in a Susan keychain, are Susan keychains a thing???

[linkemon]

Butter (Forger Loid x Reader)

Friendly reminder that English is not my first language. You can check my Masterlists both in English and Polish here. Consider supporting me on Ko-fi. You can also check out my commissions if you're interested.

Other oneshots can be found here.

ʟᴏɪᴅ ɪꜱ ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ꜰᴏʀ ɪɴꜰᴏʀᴍᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴇᴅᴇɴ ᴀᴄᴀᴅᴇᴍʏ. ꜱᴏᴍᴇ��ɴᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴇꜱ ᴛᴏ ʜɪꜱ ᴀɪᴅ - ᴀɴ ᴏʟᴅ ᴀᴄǫᴜᴀɪɴᴛᴀɴᴄᴇ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇꜱ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ ᴡᴀꜱ ꜱᴛɪʟʟ ᴛʀᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴀ ꜱᴘʏ - [ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ]. ɪɴ ʙᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇɴ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴀɴʏᴀ, ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀɴᴛꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴇᴀᴛ ʜᴇʀ ᴘᴇᴀɴᴜᴛꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴇxᴘᴇʀɪᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴀɴ ᴀᴅᴠᴇɴᴛᴜʀᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ ɪɴ ʜᴇʀ ꜰᴀᴠᴏᴜʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴘʏ ᴡᴀʀꜱ…

"Smooth like butter, like a criminal undercover Gon' pop like trouble breaking into your heart like that" Butter BTS

Anya obediently held her father's hand as she slowly trotted through the sunny city. There were so many things happening around her that she didn't know which way to look. In the orphanage, she rarely went outside. If so, it's usually a dirty yard. The buildings she was looking at now did not resemble the view from the small window of the old tenement house. They were big and colorful. She smiled broadly. It was definitely a fun day. 

— Where are we going? — she asked, tugging lightly on the sleeve of his suit. 

— To the kiosk. To get the newspaper. — Loid adjusted his hat and turned into another of the many streets. 

— [Reader] is a good informant. She'll definitely get some information about the school. 

It wasn't like Anya wanted to eavesdrop on others' thoughts. Sure, sometimes she really tried to do it on purpose and usually succeeded but it was usually without her control. That's why she didn't like crowds. In large crowds of people, her power went a bit crazy. There were times when she heard too much at once. That's why she was glad to go to a less crowded.

She looked at dad. Ask him? No, she couldn't. She would have to explain to him what was going on. He would have realized that she wasn't completely normal and he would have given her back. If she wanted to stay with him, she had to get into school. This was important to his mission. 

She strained her head. Informant... Informant... Informant... Someone like that was definitely in an episode of Spy Wars. She just couldn't quite remember which one. She usually focused on what Bondman was doing. After all, he was the coolest hero of all. He shot, defeated enemies and saved the princess. 

— Good morning. — Forger entered the small shop. 

The bell above the door jingled a few times, letting the owner know that a customer had arrived. Loid took off his hat out of politeness, looking around the shelves. He looked at Anya with a significant look. She furrowed her brow in thought but soon realized what he meant. 

— Good morning! — she screamed. 

— Hello, nice to see my regular customer! — The saleswoman immediately stopped reading the book and seemed to perk up. 

Anya looked at her closely. She had gray hair. Her face wasn't yet wrinkled like the orphanage counselor's but she leaned on her cane from time to time. 

— Dad, how do you know the old lady? 

— Anya, that's very rude. You shouldn't say that. Apologize — Forger sighed. 

— It's okay. — The lady behind the counter laughed loudly. 

— It's a good sign. My cover is working. And I thought that with my beauty I wouldn't be able to pretend to be an old woman. Checkmate, headquarters! 

Anya widened her eyes in disbelief. It must have been the whole informant. The longer she looked at her, the more small details she noticed in her disguise. Her hands were very young. And in one place above her ear the colour of her hair was slightly different than the gray that dominated her head. She wasn't old at all. She was just pretending. The little girl felt a surge of pride. She figured it out herself. 

— You must be Anya? Mr. Forger told me a little about you. — The woman smiled friendly. 

— My name is Anya Forgerzzz. I'm this years old. — She lifted her fingers neatly. — And I like peanutz very much. 

[Reader] looked at the little girl. She had to admit she was adorable. Maybe not quite perfect for this mission, judging by Twilight's report but she should be able to handle it with a little help. To which she herself was to contribute significantly. 

Eden Academy didn't accept just anyone. Known for its demanding course of education, it expected wealth, knowledge, good manners and elegance from students. It quickly eliminated families that didn't fit in and there was no chance of returning. You only had one chance to try to get there. Her professional friend — Franky — entrusted her with obtaining information about the school, as well as the main target of the mission — Donovan Desmond. She had to pass it on somehow, so she bought a small building a bit from the center. Running the kiosk was extremely boring. People usually stopped by to get their newspapers early in the morning. After that she was off almost all the time. Seeing Twilight reminded her, as always, of other, more interesting times, when she was still training to become an agent like him. Did she regret changing her profession? Maybe sometimes, when she almost fell asleep out of boredom, poring over the pages of a novel to pass the time. However, she had little choice. An injury in the last year of training eliminated her from the game. Working as a spy would strain her leg in the long run. So she took the informant course. 

Twilight hasn't changed much since his student days. Already in his first year he was promisingly good. The closer he got to completing his training, the more he proved he was perfect for the job. Now, working on the Strix, he has become his profession's best hope for peace. A lot of people were jealous of [Reader] for getting the chance to work with him. Some of her friends from work bothered her to ask him for autographs on their behalf. She disagreed, answering evasively. He didn't like it and didn't have much time. She didn't want to bother him with such trifles. Even if it made her look like a mean friend in the eyes of others. 

Women were still crazy about him. Both those in the field, at the headquarters, and those that he had to use for his missions. [Reader] wasn't surprised at all. He had a kind of charisma but he could also be sensitive when needed. However, this was usually seen in purely work-related matters. She had the feeling that few of them really knew him. She wanted to believe that she was some kind of exception. She never forgot how one of the first days no one could complete the obstacle course. They were the only ones who stayed longer to try again. Once during an exam, the boy made a wrong turn and almost hit broken equipment. Maybe he could save himself from the sharpened rod, maybe he wouldn't — it was hard to tell how well his tired body could handle it. Then [Reader] appeared out of nowhere, pulling him up. For a long time he couldn't believe that she had messed up her almost perfect score to help him. Since then, they started talking to each other. Sometimes the girl thought about whether what was between them was still friendship or whether the boundary had been crossed. The answer never came and in her senior year the relationship faded as [Reader] changed her career path. Which didn't change the fact that it was still really nice to see him, even from time to time. They usually worked far from each other, in different parts of the country. However, there were joint missions like this one.

— There should be some left around here. — [Reader] started rummaging through her old-fashioned purse. — Butter peanuts. I think you'll like them. 

— Thanks! — The little girl's beaming face let her know that she must really like this delicacy. 

The man immediately realized what was going on. It was a packet of [Reader]'s favorite flavour. She had carried at least one with her since her student days. It wasn't for sale. He tilted his head slightly, as if scolding her for spoiling the child and giving away her things. 

— Today's special edition. — [Reader] pulled out a newspaper from under the counter. 

She gently tapped her fingers against its surface and if it weren't for her mind reading, Anya would never have realized she was conveying a secret message: 

— Half of the answers to the exam. You have to wait for the rest — the woman spelled in her mind.

The girl stuffed peanuts into her mouth, feeling mounting excitement. It may not have been exactly shooting with a gun but she was involved in some real spy work. Almost like in Spy Wars! 

— You should visit us for afternoon tea sometime. Preferably as soon as possible. Maybe this week? — Forger handed Anya a tissue to wipe her mouth. 

— I have a lot of things to do but I'll see what I can do. — She looked at him uncertainly. 

— I don't know if I can get these answers that quickly — she tapped with her fingernail again.

— It's not about the mission. We didn't see for a long time — he tapped. 

She stared at the shelves, trying to keep her face neutral. She thought her feelings had faded after so long. So why was she so happy about this invitation? The answer led to only one conclusion: forgetting didn't work out at all. Maybe it would be easier to get over it if he changed or was less handsome. Meanwhile, she had the impression that he was still the same. Every time she saw him. 

— We should go now. — Loid grabbed the little hand sticky from all of the nuts. — Goodbye. — He bowed and put on his hat. 

Before leaving, he gave [Reader] a second longer look than he should have. He looked like he wanted to say something but then he looked at the baby and decided against it. He took Anya in his arms. 

— Bye Bye! — The girl waved as she left the store.

She felt like sleeping almost immediately. She rubbed her tired eyes. It was a day full of new surprises. She didn't have time to take a nap. She cuddled up to her dad. On the border between wakefulness and sleep, she sometimes heard people even when she didn't want to. This time it wasn't different:

— How long do I have to wait for the tram... 

— How boring this job is... 

— Damn! Attack? Right now? 

This last thought, picked out from a sea of others, successfully woke her up. She strained her mind, trying to figure out where it was coming from. She was horrified to discover that the chaotic words were coming from the building at the end of the street they had just left. She felt panic. How was she supposed to let anyone know what was going on? 

— Just a moment and it will be over. We must have these documents. — The unfamiliar voice sounded menacing, echoing in her head. 

— I want peanutz! — she blurted out as loudly as she could. 

Loid looked at her, raising an eyebrow. 

— You just ate the whole package. If you're hungry, I'll buy you dinner. 

— No no no. — She stamped her foot. — Peanutz! — She turned her head towards the kiosk, as if that would help her figure out whether the informant was still alive. 

— Listen. — The man crouched down, lowering himself to her eye level. — Too much sweets is harmful to children... 

— Anya wants peanutz now! — she shouted louder than last time. And she did something she saw from other children on the street. Every time they wanted something very much, they took a deep breath and started crying. She followed their example, attracting the attention of all passersby. 

She didn't feel well with her snotty nose and face covered in tears. That's why she was happy when she got a handkerchief. 

— Okay, okay. We'll buy them on the way home, how about this? — Forger asked conciliatingly. 

— NO. Butter peanutz from an old lady! — Saying this, she pulled Loid by the sleeve towards the kiosk.

The man sighed heavily. He knew perfectly well that [Reader] had no more packages. However, he was fed up with the glances given to him by random passers-by. So he let the little girl guide him to stop her from crying, at least for a moment. 

He didn't expect what he saw in the store when he crossed the threshold again that day. Anya probably didn't either because she stood there like a pillar of salt, staring at the man behind the counter. He stared at the store owner. [Reader] must have lost her wig in the heat of battle. A fresh scar marred his cheek. She must have been hit hard. She dropped her old lady cover, pointing her gun at her attacker. Someone else's muffled voice came from behind the door of the small storage room. He probably had a gag on his mouth. 

[Reader] glanced back quickly. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Twilight. 

— I thought I'd have to shoot this guy. How could I get two people out of here alive without blowing the cover? 

— We came for nuts. We didn't want to disturb your game of thieves — Loid said, trying to save the day. The little girl couldn't have known that she was a spy. This could ruin the entire mission. 

— If only Anya wouldn't find out... 

The girl gave him a quick glance. Now she had to act a little stupid. 

— Are you playing robbery? Anya wants to play too. Can I have a gun? 

— Of course! And in the meantime I'll take care of the second evil guy, what do you say? — suggested the woman. 

— Great! — said the little girl, taking over the weapon. — Handz up!

The attacker looked at her as if he wanted to say something but eventually closed his mouth. 

It was like a Bondman action movie. She felt herself almost shaking with excitement. Of course, she had to pretend she didn't know what was going on but it was still like in her favourite series. She wasn't disappointed with her dad. She knew from the beginning that if she allowed him to be adopted, sooner or later she would experience his dream. 

Twilight gave [Reader] a slightly horrified look until her lips moved in silent communication: 

— Fake gun. 

Immediately after, she opened the glove compartment, revealing a slightly injured man. The agent wasted no time in dialing the agency's number. Someone had to come and get them as quickly as possible. Considering he made the call as part of Operation Strix, the staff needed to get here as quickly as they could. It wouldn't be so easy for an informant to quietly take out these two enemies. Especially still living.

He stepped deeper into the closet and looked at the man with a critical eye. He made sure no one was looking at him and then hit him with a right hook. A soft moan was effectively muffled by the gag. 

— This is for [Reader] — he whispered towards the already unconscious person. Afterwards, he straightened his suit and joined Anya as if nothing had happened.

— I went to check the back room but [Reader] doesn't have any more nuts — he said, taking the gun from his daughter. 

— What nuts... — began the girl, who had completely forgotten why she supposedly came here. — I mean... That's a realz pityyy. We will buy in different store. 

— We have to go. Say goodbye nicely. 

— You're great! — Anya quickly ran to [Reader] and wrapped her arms around her waist. — Can we play like this again sometime? 

— Sure — the woman replied, smiling slightly. She hugged the little girl tightly, watching as Twilight knocked out the guy she had been holding at fake gunpoint with one punch. — I'll come over for tea sometime. And I'll definitely bring some butter peanuts...

[historical-fashion-polls]

Ive really been enjoying the Halloween brackets getting to see my favorite progress through the rounds is so fun! The vampire brackets been my fav, it was a great idea. Thank you for running it!

I liked the others suggestions of doing something similar for other seasons too. And I know it's a moot point for the moment since this winter doesnt work for you, but while it would still be a lot of fun to do more themed brackets, if you ever do another please consider doing something that isnt themed around a religious holiday. as someone from a different religion who kinda dreads all the Christmas themed stuff in December I wouldn't be able to enjoy a Christmas version. One that's new years or winter themed would be a fun alternative though!

Snowflake, midnight, pine tree, and candle like were suggested in the first ask about this would all be fun, though candy cane is a little christmasy for my taste. I think hot chocolate would be a good wintery one too!

hi dear anon! 💖

I'm so glad to hear that you had fun with the halloween brackets! 🥰🥰 the vampire bracket was one of my favorites too! 🩸🖤

and you needn't worry – the only themed brackets I would do would be seasonal or based around a not-explicitly-religious holiday (like halloween) ☺️💕 the original ask/answer on that idea was focused on more generally "wintery" topics, and I think it was only the anon who asked the second question who brought up the idea of christmas, but since I didn't want to get into details/semantics further on an event that likely won't happen for another year, I didn't clarify – although I suppose I perhaps should have – that any bracket I did in the winter would be non-denominational, likely based on the color categories I brainstormed in that first post ❄️❄️

if I converted "candy cane" to "peppermint," would that be less christmassy? I only ask since I'm tempted to keep that or a similar category, just because I think the white/red color combo would be really fun and striking, and I can already think of a number of garments that could be part of that category! ☺️☺️ (although I suppose I don't want to go too far into planning the details here, since I'm not even sure if there's enough general interest to sanction another tournament, but I thought I'd ask anyway! 😅😅)

thank you for your thoughtful message, and I hope this has assuaged any concerns you have! ☺️☺️ it has always been my intention to construct any possible tournaments based on non-religious themes! 💕💕

[raileurta]

Prime kids redesign

Miko

Age: 16

She/they

Has Adhd with a bit of the spicy sadness.

She's the group’s muscle and emotional support! Miko fights using a combination of MMA inspired kickboxing and parkour. Her confidence combined with her spunky attitude never fails to lift the group's spirits!

Deceptixons beware! She won't hesitate to fight dirty to get one over on you

Raf

Age: 12.5

He/him? (Doesn't really know or care)

Was born with a weak left leg and needs a cane to walk.

Raf is the techno brainiac in the group. While physically he may be weak his hacking skills are second to none; even among Cybertron's best he would be considered a genius. Raf has skipped 5 grades already and has won multiple technology based tournaments. Ultimately though he's still very young and it will show.

His alias (. ) is wanted in 10 different countries for various hacking related crimes.

Jack

Age: 15

He/him

CPR certified.

The group's braincell singular braincell aka the responsible one. Jack is the only one holding the others back from committing various crimes usually being related to murder. He knows how to keep a level head and has the groundwork of a great leader in the future.

Has two jobs currently; one at a car repair shop and the other at a fast food joint.

Explanation under cut

Miko's my favorite of the bunch so I really wanted to do her justice. I gave her a more punk type of aesthetic without trying to take away her colors. Since she can be very reckless sometimes I would imagine she has a lot of injuries and scars from her adventures. (I also made her interested in kemonomimi because why not 🤷)

The doll on her hip is a reference to Bulkhead; all the kids have something that reminds them of their guardian if you look for it. She's also the oldest because I thought it would be more interesting despite being older she's less mature than Jack.

Thought it would be interesting if Raf had another injury or condition that impacts him. I know genius with a physical disability is overplayed sometimes but it's a good trope. I wanted him to be a little cuter since he's the baby of the group so I gave him some freckles. He also has red eyes because it looks cool and it would link back to his poor eyesight. People born with red eyes usually have pretty bad vision problems.

He has some headphones to listen to music when he's being a nerd and carries his laptop in his bag along with other things.

Visually Jack is quite boring in the show so wanted to add some extra color to him. I was tempted to go a more emo route but I felt that didn't fit him. He gives off “I get bullied vibes” (canon) so I gave him a black eye and a loner feel.

His hat is a gift from his dad before he left for some extra angst.

If you have a sharp eye you would notice that all the kids have stars on them and are injured in some way. The reason for this is I thought it would be cute if the bots refer to them as starlight or other star related nicknames. Plus these guys are in an alien war they're going to get hurt eventually.

I didn't mention everything so you can find things for yourself.

That's about it for my take on them and as an extra here's the gacha version of IRL me:

(Yes I do need to wear an eye patch unironically for eye related issues)

[arabriddler]

Or how I fudge and find out my way through making digital paintings.

art program used here : Procreate ( but the method can be applied to other programs )

original painting time ≈ 3 hrs

*note : English isn’t my native language in case something is confusing or wrong. Don’t hesitate to ask for more details regarding anything

**more important note : take breaks, drink water, don’t push your hands too hard.

Base

I start off by sketching where the bodies and objects are. Nothing too detailed. I’m just arranging stuff around and figuring out sizes. You shouldn’t spend too much time in drawing this and they shouldn’t be detailed so you can easily move the elements around without exhausting yourself beforehand ( also to avoid getting bored when you’re just starting.

composition is a little complex to figure out but for this one I made the characters around the middle point to create some sort of guide for the observer’s eye movement.

2. Initial sketch (optional)

I usually make one sketch for a drawing unless it has little details or elements I’m not used to drawing. For this one it was figuring out the clothes and the details on them. Again, don’t pressure yourself to make this look perfect or right. You’re just figuring out where things are.

As you can see, the sketch is pretty rough, not all the details on the hands are drawn. The eyeliner are still there and the chair is just a shape. Lots of lines are overlapping and.. you basically get the idea.

3. Second (final) sketch.

I wouldn’t call this a lineart. Linearts are more careful, less rough, cleaner. I like using sketches more than linearts because I like the rough sketchy texture they provide, and also it’s less restricting boring for me personally . Although we keep in mind this is the drawing we’ll color. So we’re more careful about it. I draw the details and clean the sketch.

also don’t be like me, I forgot to draw the cane here and was upset about it :(( didn’t notice till days later. But also sometimes I do change things here. This one wasn’t on purpose though.

it’s important here to avoid chicken scratch by using less strokes. For example. Instead of drawing a curve with say a hundred strokes, draw it with one and then clean up anything wrong. You make have to redo one stroke a hundred times to get it right, but it’s cleaner and softer. ( it helps with drawing hair )

Nothing is wrong in art but it depends what kinds of effect you want. You can use both methods to give different vibes, draw different things. But it’s important to know how to do them. oh and, it is one stroke but it’s fast. If you linger on it the line will come out woobly and shakey. If you do it fast it’ll come out clean.

4. Blocking.

You go back over the drawing here to fill in black spaces. Maybe if someone has black hair or for shading, you can also add texture on things like walls and etc*. I like leaving some white spaces when doing this because black is very reflective irl, so it gives some shine to it. It honestly depends on what the black element is, something’s are shiny some things are not. But it’s pretty fun

**when it comes to texture this is an example from another drawing

5. Grey scale coloring.

I have already a plate on hand of colors from white to black to use in my drawings. You can use three or more. This is the one I use

Circles to indicate that if you have white, grey, and black, that’s enough. why grey scale? The thing about grey scale coloring is that it helps figuring out contrast. You don’t want all your drawing to be of similar tone, when you have contrast, it helps make elements pop and differentiate things.

"Joseph Nelson." Roboflow Blog, May 15, 2020. https://blog.roboflow.com/when-to-use-contrast-as-a-preprocessing-step/

I’m honestly still figuring out how greyscale works but, looking at real life pictures is one way you can know how to do it. See how light is distributed where whites and blacks are used. One key element is to figure out where light comes from, and shading according to that . The light source isn’t very strong with this drawing so it was more of a simplified shading. If something is over the other, shade underneath. That’s the simplest way to figure out shading

before coloring, I did change the sketch to a more grey color and set the layer to multiply. What multiply does is that it darkens the color underneath it with a hue of the color in the multiply layer. I know, confusing, so here is a picture.

Sorry, got a little detailed there. back to our drawing.

As I said, the light source wasn’t very complex here to give more of a photo shoot vibe, but I can show another drawing with a more natural strong light

Places directly getting the light get very light colors like white, the ones opposite use very dark grey or even black.

of course the coloring here isn’t very realistic, I have, after all, colored the character, kristen, in lighter colors than everything else. This is because I wanted to create a sense of contrast to make her pop out against the background. So don’t limit yourself, play around.

6. gradient map

gradient maps replace the grey scale colors into other colors on a specific range, you can use a gradient map offered by the program or one you make yourself. How to chose them? Depending on the vibe you want to translate. I have synesthesia so I sort of follow my gut when it comes to this, but you can also look at movies and pictures and see what colors they use and what feelings they give. Or just go warm colors give warm feelings and cold colors give cold feelings. Or just whatever you like. Just have fun with it

See? It looks pretty fun. Heck you can even stop here even. Note that I merged the sketch layer and the grey scale one into one layer so it can change the color of the sketch layer too. Also sometimes id use the blur tool to blend some things but I didn’t use that here.

another thing to note is that if you leave things empty in the greyscale drawing they won’t change color in the gradient map, that’s why I use white in the empty spaces. Or sometimes I don’t if I’m unsure if I want to keep something white/black or not.

7. Coloring.

here, I add another layer and set it to multiply and basically color it in over the drawing. I have the colors for the characters on hand to use, and they change according to the gradient map.

note that it will look weird and wrong at first but just keep going, trust the process. The colors will fit in together.

Also notice the difference between the colors in the drawing and the colors on the color palette. Cool no?

And this is how the whole thing looks. You can also add details in here. Like the drawings on the vets and Ed’s bow tie. Makeup, blush, lipstick, nail paint… etc etc.

8. Details

I add another normal setting layer here and basically go back over the drawing to add details, fix mistakes, draw over things to make them pop off or look more hard than soft.

I mostly like going over the hair and facial features in this step, and also adding highlights and shine.

I also felt that the background was a little too empty, but I didn’t want something too detailed so it wouldn’t take the attention from the characters. so I added a pattern.

9. Finale touches. (Optional) sometimes the drawing is done here, sometimes it’s not.

I’d maybe add overlay and/or add layers and to highlight light sources, or add a multiply layer to emphasize shadows like in this example.

for this drawing I didn’t do that as I was satisfied with the lights and shadow, but it still felt too… rigid.

so I added a textile texture as a multiply layer so it would look more…Touchable?

And…that’s it!

If you like this, you can check out the original drawing’s post ( or support me on ko-fi? ) 👀👀👀

[blindbeta]

I have a mostly blind main character/narrator in my ancient-Greece inspired fantasy setting. She is an epic poet. Though she experienced most of the story she tells, the story isn't about her and there are scenes that she didn't see herself. I want to show these scenes in the tradition of epic, in which the poet is omniscient.

Should the scenes my narrator didn't experience herself be described as if she had experienced them--blindness and all--or should she describe them as they've been told to her from the perspectives of others? Does doing the latter erase her blindness? Do you have a different idea? Am I overthinking this entirely?

I love your blog and appreciate any advice or critiques you have. Thanks!

I don’t think this would count as erasing blindness. It reminds me of a blind person writing or narrating a story or play, which would be similar to a sighted person doing the same. Omniscient point of view is fine for blind people, just as sharing a story told by another would be.

You can show your main character’s blindness in other ways, if she has any scenes herself inside or outside of the story she tells. Does she have a cane? How does her blindness influence or enrich her life outside of her poetry and storytelling?

You may also consider including her vision more in the epic. For example, if your character has central vision loss, the epic may not include descriptions of faces, while instead focusing on voice, tone, degree of warmth, color, or texture. Even if the story is told in omniscient point of view, the narrator’s influence could still be felt.

Lastly, while ‘mostly blind’ is a bit of a misconception of blindness, it sounds like your character has some vision, as most blind people do. Even totally blind people can describe events and people visually. With this in mind, she could use her residual vision without issue.

I think having a sensitivity reader would be helpful. Such as through me, @sensitivityreaders

If you feel worried about your main character’s blindness, perhaps portraying blindness in other characters would help. Given the setting, characters might be more susceptible to common causes of blindness due to having less access to healthcare, particularly modern treatment. Common causes of visual impairment and blindness, according to this page by the World Health Organization, include cataracts, glaucoma, uncorrected refractive errors, age-related macular degeneration, or diabetic retinopathy. Lack of access to healthcare could lead to higher rates of vision loss due. You may be able to use some of those, if that helps.

[mariacallous]

Imagine for a second, a group of Jews cooking a slightly different version of challah for Shabbat, matzah for Passover, and donuts for Hanukkah. A group of people whose ancestors were forced to convert to Catholicism against their will, yet continued to practice Jewish customs underground, even at the risk of being ostracized and tortured for doing so. Meet The Silent Jews.

Sometimes referred to as Crypto-Jews, anusim (Hebrew for coerced ones), or conversos, Silent Jews are descendants of Spanish Jews expelled from Spain and Portugal in 1492. Most left medieval Iberian territories for the Ottoman Empire or North Africa; others fled persecution and settled in new frontiers in the New World, where many found refuge. 

I come from one of those persecuted families who came to South America around 1532 and discreetly practiced Jewish rituals, living in fear of being hunted down by the Inquisition. I only found out that my family was actually Jewish as a teenager, that all our colorful, fragrant, crunchy dishes were deeply rooted in Judaic culinary traditions from 16th-century Spain. That the ingredients and aromas of my mom’s kitchen resembled dishes from the Sephardic gastronomy repertoire. 

When the pandemic struck, the combination of lockdown, curiosity, and melancholy led me to knead, mix, and eat plates from my mom’s Jewish inheritance passed on through several generations of women in our family. The kitchen was the right place to honor their sacrifices, bravery, and perseverance to maintain tradition, despite centuries of fear and persecution.

My locked-down days soon began to be filled with ingredients such as eggplants, spinach, leeks, and turnips, which mingled with the scents of cinnamon, anise, cardamom, and nutmeg, coming together with dried fruits and legumes.

Arroz con garbanzos (chickpea rice) was one of those dishes. With its characteristic aroma of bay leaf, caramelized onions, and raisins, it’s cooked with turmeric to give it its signature yellow color. As a kid, it was often mixed with a fried egg, with parsley sprinkled on top. In my search for Sephardic recipes, I became aware that this dish is very similar to pilaf with saffron, a Mediterranean spice my ancestors did not have access to since it didn’t grow in their new home.

Another delicious dish that also appears in the kitchens of Sephardic Jews from Turkey, Greece, and Morocco is estofado de berenjenas (eggplant stew). Made by sautéing eggplants in olive oil with garlic, onion, and cumin, this quick stew is served with smoked cheese or feta and an abundance of cilantro. My family pair it with homemade bread or corn arepas, an example of incorporating local ingredients.

On the most stressful days of the past year, comfort food became a necessity. A hearty dish of huevos con tomate (eggs with tomato) afforded me a sense of tranquility and a break from the chaos and uncertainty that surrounded me. This dish, which closely resembles shakshuka, was cooked at my house with ají dulce —the Caribbean’s colorful semi-spicy pepper— chili flakes, and smoked paprika. It’s so piquant and fragrant, I usually pair it with plain white rice or bread. However, my mother served it as a second course to complement her traditional pescado mermao, a hake fish stew cooked over a slow fire in an iron skillet with a mixture of garlic, peas, and eggplant, smothered in a sauce of chilies and tomatoes. The last touch included a bunch of fresh cilantro leaves and a hint of sour lime juice. It filled our entire house with a thick, citrusy aroma.

And the desserts! Buñuelos, small balls of fried dough with a sweet or salty filling; mine are usually made with raw cane sugar syrup, cloves, and nutmeg. There was always cake — plantain cake with cinnamon and smoked cheese, or traditional bizcochuelo, a sponge cake that was ever-present in my school lunchbox. Similar to pan d’Espana, which Sephardim took with them to the Diaspora, my mother put her own spin on this soft, light cake, using cornmeal instead of ground almonds, substituting orange blossom water with a few drops of rum, and swapping grated orange peel for the peel of a lemon, instead. 

Reconnecting with my roots through food during these difficult times has helped me to cope with stress, anxiety, and loneliness. There’s still so much to cook, eat, and share; I’ll continue paying homage to each and every one of the dishes that my family preserved with such dedication and courage. This is the only way I can celebrate — and always carry with me — their everlasting legacy.

[doe-eyed-fool]

Fallen {Chapter Twenty One}

Alastor x (fem)Reader

"So, how are you feeling right now?" Angel asks, getting comfortable as he sets on his bed. First he had grabbed two hard seltzers from the mini fridge next to his bed.

He handed one to me, I just held it for a minute. "Well...I guess I'm happy." I start. "For once, I'm not afraid of Alastor. I feel like there were multiple times he could have hurt me, and he hasn't. And...he's really been helping me out so..."

"Yeah, you never really explained that. How did he help you?" Asked Angel. I tapped my fingers on the seltzer can a few times before exhaling. "I was lost...and alone. I was hurt and scared. So very scared and confused. I had no idea what to do...And then here he comes, offering to help me. I can't really go into much detail, but...I feel like he's helped me see another way. Like, another way to make my afterlife worth living."

"...We talkin' about the same Alastor?" Angel asked.

"I know, he isn't the type." I sigh. "But, once you get to know him. Once he lets down a few walls. He's not that bad..." I say with a smile.

"Boy, you must really love that guy to think all that." Angel muttered as he took a swig of his drink. I only shrug. "It's true. T-That he's not so bad...not the other thing..."

"Y/n, it's just me. You can be honest." Said Angel softly. "I mean, I already know you like him, so...It's not like you'd be revealing some grand secret or anything."

I roll my eyes. "I...I don't know Angel. I really don't." I look down at the drink in my hand, the coldness of the can starting to numb my palm. "I don't think I'm ready for something like this...not right now. Not after..."

Angel shifts slightly in his spot next to me. "It's scary, huh?" He asks, I nod my head. "All teasing aside. I can't say Alastor would be the best fit, when it comes to things like this. For as long as I or anyone had known him, he's never been the romantic type. Nobody knows what he'd be like as a partner. And that can be scary when you're...unsure."

I nod again before opening the can and taking a swig. "I think I might be delusional, Angel." I mutter.

"How so?" He asks.

"I think...my emotions are taking over, and creating this version of Alastor that's not real in my head. It's not the first time it's happened so..."

I continue. "Let's say I do find myself in a relationship with him. What if his true colors show, and he becomes an entirely different person from what I've thought up? What if we don't work out? What if it's a huge waste of both of our time?" My voice cracked with my next question.

"What if I get hurt?"

Angel sighs. "I don't really have a solid answer for ya, Y/n. I'm...not the best person for relationship advice. But...I guess I'll just say this much..."

"If Alastor loves you, really loves you...he'd act like it. He wouldn't put on some fake persona to lure you in. He wouldn't give you empty promises of love and affection. And he would not hurt you. If he does...then he's no better than the rest of the shitty bastards in this place. You deserve someone that would treat you right, you shouldn't have to settle for the bare minimum. And if Alastor isn't willing to step up and be the guy you deserve, then drop his ass. I might not be as strong as Alastor, but I'd fucking fill him up with lead if he tried anything funny with you. That goes for anyone else too."

I smile and place my hand on his. "Thank you Angel. That means a lot." Angel smiles as well.

"I really don't think you understand what's happening..."

The shadowy figure looked over its master, looking slightly concerned, but mostly annoyed.

"You are getting attached to her. I can see it. Anyone can see it. And that's a bad thing, you know that. So why continue entertaining these feelings?"

"First of all..." Alastor began, raising his cane before setting it down hard on the tail of the shadow, firmly keeping it in place. The shadow fell silent and stays still, knowing better than to try disobey Alastor.

"There are no feelings involved. I have no idea how you could have thought that ridiculous accusation up. Secondly, I am not getting attached. You are an extension of me, you should know that's not true. You should know how we really feel about her."

The shadow nods. "Yes. That you have some sort of fascination for her. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you like her."

Alastor gripped tighter onto the cane, slight distortion could be heard coming from him. "Listen here...and you listen good. I do not like anyone here, much less the people I'm around near twenty four-seven, in this god forsaken hotel."

"And what of Rosie and Mimzy?"

"They're different."

"Yes. But Y/n is not?"

Alastor narrows his eyes. "She isn't, I can actually stand to be around her. But not let that fool you into thinking anything more of it. Now, I do not want to hear another word about this, do I make myself clear?"

The shadow sighed before nodding its head. Alastor finally let up on the cane. "Good. Now leave me." The shadow did as it was told and disappeared, leaving Alastor alone. Alastor let out a sigh of his own and pinched the bridge of his nose.

You are getting attached to her. I can see it. Anyone can see it.

Yes, Alastor knew perfectly well why that was such a bad thing. 'Not only would it jeopardize me and my power, but would place Y/n in danger.' He thought before moving his hand away.

He wanted to deny it, that he wasn't growing attached. But it was becoming harder and harder to ignore, that funny feeling stirring in his chest. He's felt many things over the years, but this...even when he was alive had never felt this...

Fear, that was another thing. He knows what fear feels like, but has not experienced it in a very long time. But right now, thinking about what these feelings might be, what they could turn into...

Alastor shook his head, dismissing the thought. No. They would not turn into anything. He didn't need to distract himself by thinking about this silly nonsense anyway. Alastor decided then it was time for a little stress relief. It's been a minute since he's painted the town red after all...

"Still nothing. That shithead must be keeping her locked up in the hotel or something." Vox mutters to himself, as he looks at his dozens of TV screens. All, we're surveilling the city. The TV's could act as a one way mirror sometimes. While passing by demons could look in, Vox could look right back.

He groaned and leaned back. "Looks like I'll have to resort to plan B." He said as he reaches for his phone. After a few seconds, he spoke.

"It's me. Go ahead and get over there. And I swear to fuck, you had better not be lying about this..."

[pixaho]

hi can I request a soulmate With Kizzy and kaito with girly reader?

I was thinking maybe reader could be a foreigner she goes to college but her & friend decided to take a break they go to Rocky’s club but accidentally runs into kaito & Kizzy she know they’re soulmates but is a little intimidating by them both ( just because she knows what they do with fighting) so she tries to avoid them but it stop working after a while. I want to see some angst and fluff

I’m sorry if there isn’t much details but this is the best I come up with I had a better idea but I forgot it

I Desire You

♥ Pairing | Kizzy x Kaito x Foreign!Reader ♥ AU? Yes | Soulmates and College ♥ Word Count | 1,336

♥ A/N | I'm so sorry for taking so long to write this! I hope you do enjoy it and for the sake of this, I added a wee little spicy scene because I love Kizzy and Kaito (certified Kizzy x Kaito shipper and WIFE). I also decided to add Kizzy going to college to get a degree or something and something a wee special!

♥ Warnings | Some angsty bs, a lot of fluff, and a wee little spicy scene for my spicey hoes. Also mentions of alcohol, violence, and scandalous dancing ;).

M.LIST H&L LIST

You weren't born when the Soulmate Stars Aligned happened. It had happened some time in the late 1700s, caused by a comet that looked different that hit the earth.

People thought it was truly nothing, but magnificent when the blue comet hit the earth. But something changed that very day. They started waking up with colors not being there, unless you were lucky. It was then noticed that when people met a certain person that those colors became full again. It was strange to say the least.

For the past hundreds of years, people have called those lucky people "soulmates". If you didn't find your soulmate, you lived without color or met another soulmate who couldn't see colors.

You had been stuck in your college room all that day when your friend and room mate mentioned a club she wanted to go to. Feeling the need to get out, you agreed. So she told you the place and time. She seemed to be very happy when you said yes.

So there you were, at the club, dancing with your friend and drinking different beverages. Most were alcoholic. The reason for the great club get together? She met her soulmate. Before you. You weren't happy with it but you were happy for her. So you both were treated to drinks.

You knew the club as you'd done research. The infamous Club Heaven, owned by Rocky who ran White Rascals. Or better known to your college as the devils. It wasn't a bad place nor was the gang bad, as they tended to protect many women of the place. You could see a few of the woman now, dancing scandalously in a similar way to how your friend was dancing as the music played.

You bumped backwards into a guy by complete accident and stumbled as he turned.

"何なんだ？?" He turned, looking right at you. "What the fuck?"

"彼女は酔うと不器用になるんだ." Your friend says as she gets in between you and the man. He seems highly intoxicated. Almost reeks of whiskey and not the cheap kind. It makes you slightly gag. "Sorry about her, she's a bit clumsy when drunk."

"その通りだ！俺のシャツを見ろ" He yells, louder than the club music. Which makes you giggle a bit. "Damn right you should be sorry! Look at my fucking shirt."

"もう謝っただろ. もういいよ. それに、シャツの洗濯はそんなに高くないよ." She's quick the respond, turning around as she finishes to get you to a bathroom. "I already apologized. That's enough. Besides, washing shirts isn't that expensive."

"このアマが！" He spits as he grabs a fistful of her hair, yanking it back. Everything happens so fast that your eyes are still looking at the intoxicated man as he hits the ground. You look from him to your friend who is talking to 2 other people, both of which are men. "You bitch!"

One of them seems uninterested in the whole situation, rather looking up at a man who is sitting at the railing of the stairs. He wears an all white suit with a cane and fingerless gloves. Rocky. The man that stands beside him looks like a butler. They seem to notice you staring, darting your eyes back at your friend who is talking to the other one. A rather cute person.

The other person turns to look at you. "大丈夫ですか？" "Are you okay?"

"ええと、大丈夫です. ありがとう." You speak somewhat lowly but loud enough for them to hear. They extend a hand, to which you shake before realizing who they are. "Um, I'm fine. Thank you."

Kizzy and Kaito of White Rascals, the two that everyone feared. The duo that, together, were the most people powerful.

You grabbed your friend. "もう行くよ. ちょっと疲れたし、明日に備えて酔いを醒まさないと." "I've got to go. I'm a little tired and need to sober up for tomorrow."

You turn, running out of the club.

♥

Ever since that day, you had been avoiding Club Heaven and White Rascals, which was quite hard to do considering the next few days, you found out that Kizzy went to your same college. But the weird thing is, that you hadn't rubbed hands with anyone after that night yet you could see color. Which only ever means one thing; Kizzy was your soulmate.

You told your friend of course, but as it turned out, Kizzy and Kaito were soulmates. Apparently, they both could only see a select few colors. That means, you were possibly both their soulmate.

So, for a whole month, you evaded Kizzy. If you were placed for a project in a class, you'd ask to be placed in a different group. If you had the same friends who wanted to go places, you would drop out of the activity. Soon you realized that avoiding her was impossible without ruining your own relationships and grades.

Today was the day that you ended your avoidance of your soulmates. You got placed in a project with Kizzy and only her. Everybody else got placed in groups, but due to the odd number, you were stuck with her.

Now you are sitting across from her as she stares at you. Even though you grew up in Britain, Japanese was still being learned. So, you decided to clear up the awkward silence and stares by ordering something off the menu.

"あの、おっぱい茶を注文してもいいですか?" You asked as the waitress stared at you in bewilderment. Kizzy giggles a bit. "Um, can I order some titty tea?"

"Stop laughing at me." You hide your face.

"彼女はお茶を頼みたいんだ. おっぱいじゃなくて." Kizzy smiles at the waitress. As she bows. She wants to ask for tea. Not boobs."

Still embarrassed, you refuse to remove your hands from your face. You knew at some point you had to make yourself look like an idiot, but did it really have to be the time that you are sitting across from one of your soulmates?

"So, you don't speak perfect Japanese?" She says flawlessly. You remove your hands from your face, confused. "Oh, I've been learning English. Figured a pretty girl like you were not from Japan."

Your face turns red at the compliment of sorts. "I just didn't expect someone to learn English."

"English for you."

"Still."

"Why the avoiding?" That's the question that chokes you up. You could lie and say that you didn't like her or you could tell the truth that you were scared of her and Kaito.

You decide on the truth. "I've heard about you and Kaito. A fearsome duo in White Rascals, those of who that fight and were also apart of Doubt. But I'm also scared-"

"Scared that we're soulmates?" She asks, moving a book on the table to the side. Your eyes widen.

"How did you know?" You squeak.

"It's weird that the same girl from the club that had a guy put his hands on her would ask the person who defended her about her soulmate unless it was..." She seems to think about the word before looking at you, "挑発された."

"Provoked?"

"Yes, that word."

"So, I guess I'm not the only one who isn't entirely used to or fully learned another language." You mumble, looking at the waiter as she places the tea down for you. You thank her.

Suddenly someone sits down at the table.

"Kaito!" Kizzy smiles. You keep your eyes glued to your tea. You can feel his glaring into you, but you can't tell if its anger or hatred. This makes you uncomfortable as you cough. A hand snakes over your hand and you realize it's Kizzy's. "Ignore him, he's just grumpy that you were avoiding us for so long silly."

You look over at Kaito who is no longer glaring at you but rather looking down at Kizzy's hand on yours.

"If we do a polyamory thing considering that we have another soulmate, I want a rule." He seems to relax in his chair.

"We can have a rule."

"Good." Kaito takes a breath. "Consent."

"Consent?" You ask, confused by that.

"Consent, to do stuff with you guys. I want action too." Kizzy giggles at that request and so do you.

"Sure." You mumble.

Mutuals ♥ | @talusional

[blueberrypancakesworld]

New environment - Chapter 3

warning : slightly angst , fluff , emotional , comfort , making friends , nervousnes , feelings

next chapter , masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She could feel that it was no longer the earth on which she was. For this, the environment was too different, too pure, too nature-laden. It was completely pure, untouched and not as dirty as the earth.

The first step was hesitant and she held onto Jake's shoulder before moving her cane in front of her. ,,This is incredible," she murmured, and Jake let his gaze wander as well. ,,Yes, the machines are truly incredible," she heard him marvel and shook her head. ,,If you say so...what does it look like here?" she asked, trying to picture it somehow.

Besides a large stone area and some kind of wall because the noise was thrown back a little she couldn't make out much. ,,The base is big, there are machines and combat robots everywhere. It looks like a metal city with soldiers, mercenaries, vehicles... in front of it and it only takes a moment, the base is a well metal building" he explained tersely and she nodded. ,,And Pandora?" she asked but stopped when Jake stopped and a loud vehicle like a truck drove in front of her.

She felt him tense for a moment as if he had seen something that frightened him. ,,Is everything all right?" she asked him, but Jake just shook his head. ,,We'll be right there," he encouraged himself and her before they continued on their way. The comments of two soldiers were not lost on either of them, but they ignored them for now. Trouble was the last thing they needed for now.

Jake opened the door and Y/n helped him hold it open so he could get through. ,,We can take the masks off," she explained and they both took a deep breath. ,,It doesn't smell so clean anymore" she thought, slightly concerned, sniffing the slight smell of metal, oil, deodorant and science.

Even if the latter was not a real smell, she knew that they would both be right here. Walking side by side, Jake seemed to be amazed as far as she could feel. ,,At least someone feels comfortable" she thought and felt the metallic ground under her ball at the front part of the staff. Everything here seemed to be made of metal.

However, she also knew that it was better that way. A small hole or crack and they would all be dead in four minutes. An unpleasant thought as probably everyone here feels.

They went another piece before they arrived at a crossroads with different ways. ,,Sorry, but I have to discuss something about my brother. Do you think you can find your way to the introduction? I'll catch up with you," Jake said and rolled over to her so he was in front of her. Alone through here she heard her thoughts and looked around.

But the colors were dimmed not dark just not as bright a clear difference from outside. ,,It's okay, I'll manage, I'll ask if I need to," she said and gave him an encouraging smile before they stopped listening to his rolls.

Only when he was gone did she sigh and try to hear something. But it was too much to tell where. Well then, the old fashioned way she thought and started moving around hoping to find the hall or room.

She decided to go to the right, a path that led her further in. Not only was there less light from outside, but the smell of metal increased. This is not the science area, she reminded herself, trying not to bump into anyone.

What landed her on the search only conditionally. If she bumped into someone, she apologized, but most of the time they just answered with a quick ,,I'm sorry" or not at all. She was not stupid, she knew that here were not only halfway honorable soldiers but also mercenaries and other people with whom one did not want to mess. But she was not discouraged, even if it was ridiculous.

And it could not protect her from the dangers out there, maybe it gave her a little respect. With her free hand she went to her neck and pulled out the dog tag so that it was visible over her top. Maybe someone here knows him? the thought crossed her mind before she continued. Her hopes went up even as her surroundings became a little quieter.

Where it was quieter, there could only be the canteen, the sleeping quarters or the meeting rooms. A chance of three but she would have to take the risk. Going further through it, she quickly realized that it was not the canteen.

There was no smell of food in the air and no loud talking. Only the chambers and the meeting rooms remain she thought and ventured further ahead. Soon it was so quiet that she thought she had arrived at the base in the basement, if there was such a thing.

Her free hand moved along the wall and after a few more steps she had a first doorbell in her hand. Taking one last deep breath in and out, she slowly opened the door and stepped inside. ,,Hello, is this where the new arrivals are being briefed?" she asked, trying to guess what was waiting for her.

It was a medium sized room, there was definitely a window and the colors were a little brighter. It smelled of leather and wood as if someone had made something. Before these smells mixed with an aftershave.

An interesting smell that aroused her interest but slowly she doubted that this was the meeting room. ,,Hello is-" she wanted to ask again when she bumped into something hard with her cane. Astonished to stretch out her hand, she had hardly noticed how the smell had become stronger.

Slowly, fearing to touch something wrong, she felt fabric under her fingertips and the warmth of a body underneath. ,,You are more than just wrong" she suddenly heard a male voice say and she felt the muscles under the clothes tighten slightly.

Looking up slightly at the man, she took her cane away. Her expression showed surprise and her heart beat faster for a moment as the colors in her vision shone brightly.

It was not the same as when she was outside talking to her mother or teaching. No, it was completely new and she didn't know why she was seeing it so brightly. The light blue mixed with white and green. That's how she perceived him and couldn't quite interpret it.

Slowly she held out her hand to him. Before she said, ,,Excuse me, I hope I'm not anywhere I'm not supposed to be. I'm new here and well, I'm looking for the briefing, I'm Y/n" and gave the unknown a slight smile. He must be at least a soldier she thought, still seeming to feel his muscles. But where exactly was she? Suddenly, the unknown man grabbed her necklace and pulled it towards him.

Involuntarily, she took another step towards him to prevent the chain from breaking. ,,You did not serve," he stated, sounding more disappointed than pleased. ,,No I didn't, my father did, I'm a biologist" she defended herself and reached for the dog tag. She felt him open his hand, making it easier for her to accept. She hated it. ,,Thank you," she said snappishly and gave him a warning look.

But he ignored it rather than taking it seriously. ,,You're the new one from the crazy ones," he said amusedly and walked past her. ,,The crazy ones?" she echoed and turned to him. He's just leaving, she thought indignantly, biting her tongue to keep from grumbling at him.

A sigh crossed his lips before he opened the door. ,,The biologists, doctors, nature lovers," he enumerated and she rolled her eyes before walking towards the door. ,,Oh, and to answer your question, Colonel Miles Quaritch, the man in charge of your security," he said, holding the door open for her, which she would have otherwise hit on the way out. She didn't have to look at him or say a word to realize that he was grinning at the whole situation.

She would have loved to fly straight back to earth. Wordlessly she walked past him, but as soon as she was standing in the corridor she knew she had to rely on him. Sighing, she unfolded her blind staff and walked next to the colonel to finally get to the place where she originally wanted to go. The two remained silent.

On the one hand she didn't know what to say and on the other hand he thought the same. ,,How long have you been here?" she asked when the silence became too uncomfortable. ,,It's called Colonel for you long enough to know that if you go out of it you die," he warned and she heard his dissatisfaction about his unnamed title clearly.

,,If you say so...Colonel. Besides, I made it here from Earth, I don't give up so easily," she said and looked at him for a moment. Before she continued to walk beside him and they walked along the corridors to the large room. She could hear the acoustics changing and people talking.

But as soon as she got closer, the voices stopped, and she realized it wasn't her fault, but rather Quaritch's. He's tense, she thought with a grin as she leaned against one of the tables, ignoring the looks of the others. A slight smile was on her lips as she closed her eyes for a moment to take in the sound.

Quaritch walked up and down the tables. He talked about the dangers of the planet, the inhabitants, the new environment. Not everyone wants to kill you, she thought, looking up at him, unable to ignore the fact that she had never seen her colors glow so brightly since she had been in the room with him. Maybe it's just the environment, she thought, but her inner self told her otherwise.

Taking her eyes off him, she heard the sound of rolling and looked to her left and recognized Jake. The colors much darker than Quaritch's she gave him a smile. ,,Hey" she said softly and Jake nodded before they both listened to Quaritch until the end.

But all the time she couldn't deny that no matter how long or short she looked at him, the colors were always so beautifully bright. ,,You made it here after all," Jake noted happily as the two made their way toward the lab area.

Past the many seemingly endless soldiers that came towards them. ,,Yeah, you could say that," she said, avoiding his gaze. ,,Why did something happen?" came the question almost as quickly and she thought that he would raise an eyebrow. ,,I'll tell you some other time," she said and was about to continue talking to him when she suddenly heard a voice behind her. ,,Jake wait" said a man and although she wanted to stop Jake continued his way.

,,I'm Norm Spellmann" he introduced himself and somehow tried to find a place next to the two without running into the other soldiers. ,,I'm Y/n," she said curtly, looking reddish and brown tones as she looked at him. ,,I knew your brother, we were at Avatar training together," he said, and she was surprised that Jake had left that out of his conversation.

Even though she found it a bit tactless to bring up these sad memories again for her friend. The three of them walked a short distance until she heard a door open and she got Norm's confirmation. ,,The bio lab is our new home and the place where we will probably spend most of our time," he said happily and began to introduce herself to the others.

Jake and Y/n also looked around and the colors changed to a bright white and gray. Medically laboratory sterile, she thought with a grin, and walked behind the two of them, careful not to knock anything over.

It was much quieter than in the hallways, a pleasant atmosphere for her ears and eyes. ,,That's where the connection chambers are," she heard Norm say, but walked behind Jake, who turned left into a larger open space in the lab. ,,Wow, they're really big," Jake said in amazement, and she wished she could see what he meant.

,,What's there?" she asked them both, feeling around with her hand before touching cold glass. ,,These are our avatars, created from our genes and samples from the original inhabitants," Norm said, and now she knew approximately where she was. She had read and heard about the Avatar program.

She knew it was a highly expensive and yet extraordinarily fascinating project. ,,What do they look like?" she asked, looking at Jake who was next to her and also looking at the tank. ,,Blue and big," he said, but Y/n shook his head. ,,No, I mean do they look like you?" she put it right and Jake looked at his avatar.

She said sadly, and she put a hand on his shoulder. ,,No believe me Jake he looks like you that's your avatar now" she heard Norm say who had come to them with a doctor.

The four of them stayed with the avatars for a while before they all continued on their way to the linking chambers.

She heard a whirring or routing sound and carefully groped around and felt capsule-like beds next to the railing to her right. She heard how apparently one of the capsules opened. As soon as a woman shouted, ,,Where are my damn cigarettes?" before someone ran up quickly and apparently gave the woman her cigarettes.

A moment later, she smelled a faint odor of smoke before she knew who was standing in front of her, Jake, Norm and the doctor. ,,Doctor Grace Augustine, it is an honor to make your acquaintance," she said, holding out her hand to the doctor. ,,Doctor Wilder your work has been interesting but I doubt we need you and this Marine" she said and Y/n knew the older woman could be more than brusque and pulled her hand away.

,,Besides you Marine I don't need you I need your brother and you Doctor Wilder are welcome to get to work examining the plants" she said and was about to leave when Jake approached her. ,,I can't do that, he's dead, I'll take his place" he explained curtly and seemed to have convinced Augustine.

,,All right, I want you to be here tomorrow at eight o'clock and let the biologist find her way around first, I don't need anyone ruining my samples," she said before heading for the door to talk to the leader.

,,She doesn't seem too pleased," Jake obviously noticed and the others nodded. ,,We'll just get on with it," she muttered, looking around before using her hand to identify and feel the objects around her.

The entire lab was large and it took her several hours to find her way around the connecting chambers. Although she did not yet have the people and everything else in her head, a picture slowly opened up in her mind.

Jake and Norm also helped her and told her how things looked here in case she didn't calculate something. It was nice help, help among colleagues and maybe even friends. Quaritch she thought and her hand clasped her necklace.

No, he had helped her because he thought she was weak and helpless. She knew that as soon as one saw her stick or looked into her eyes there were two possibilities. The first, and for her, the most common.

People were uncomfortable with her as if she were an alien. Some didn't talk to her at all, helped her too much, or talked so loudly that she couldn't understand if they knew the difference between blind and deaf.

The other rarer kind were those who took it, ignored it and helped her only when she asked. It was a simple relationship between her and the second faction. She did not feel helpless and yet she felt respected.

,,Y/n are you coming to dinner in the cantina?" she heard the voice of Jake, who was waiting for her with Norm at the entrance to the junction chamber. ,,Yes, I'll be right there," she called, rising from her seat before turning off her dictation machine, on which she left her impressions for her studies and walked slowly to Jake and Norm.

On the way to the kanteen, she folded up her cane and oriented herself by the sounds of the two men.

Much easier and more efficient as long as it didn't get too loud. But that changed in the Kanteene it was filled with talking, laughing and eating sounds which is why she put herself between Jake and Norm to get a little more security.

The three of them coordinated themselves into one of the last tables in the back rows and sighed when they finally arrived. ,,This reminds me of the sacrifice time in high school," she heard Norm quip, and she could hear a certain amount of pain.

,,Yeah, but we're the cool ones now, believe me," she said, giving him an encouraging smile. ,,Was high school that bad for you?" Jake asked, getting a confused look from Norms. ,,Were you the athletic guy or the class clown?" she countered, taking a bite of her food.

Jake ran his hands over his hair, slightly embarrassed. ,,Well, more like the truant and helpful justice seeker," he confessed, and the three of them smirked.

She let her gaze wander dark tones before her eyes which was due to the soldiers. ,,Are the higher-ups sitting here too?" she asked, taking the last bite before looking at them. ,,No, they wouldn't sit with us here, they probably have their own room," said Jake, who had more experience than the others in the military.

The meal continued quietly, but they talked for a long time until the three of them went to sleep. To their surprise, the science team seemed to get really small rooms.

In contrast to the normal sodalists and mercenaries who slept in raised beds in large rooms, she had a small room. From what she had met and explored she had a relatively large comfortable bed. A desk with a chair that was connected to her research and on which was her data.

A closet and a shelf. Her favorite thing about the whole thing, however, was the adjoining bathroom, which bordered her room through a sliding door. A more or less spacious shower, toilet and sink with a mirror. ,,This is quite good" she said and began to unpack her things and slowly settle in.

Or to make herself a little more comfortable for the time she was here. She didn't know exactly how much time had passed as she reached for her sleeping shirt. A few hours probably and yet she was not tired.

The feeling of success in her dreams and wishes was satisfying. Pandora...I am really on Pandora the thought went through her mind and she looked at the photo on her small nightstand next to her bed. The photo that showed her with her mother and father together.

She was about to undress when there was a knock on her door. Who is it? she asked herself and put the sleeping shirt on her bed before she went to the door and opened it. ,,Miss Wilder, I'm sorry to disturb you so late, but I'm supposed to take you to your recruiters," she heard the familiar voice of Quaritch.

The colors brightened and she couldn't hide her surprise and yet this small joy that was in conflict with the reluctance. She leaned against the doorframe and said, ,,Quaritch, I didn't know you were a gofer," she joked, deciding to tease him a little. She had not forgotten his action with the chain.

,,Colonel still Miss and I'm here to make sure you don't get lost again" he did the same and the two of them looked at each other for a moment before she walked past him and the two of them started to move. ,,What is it about?" she asked after a short while due to the silence that fell between them.

,,It's about the promise to see again" he said and looked at her. ,,My eyes" she said and also looked at him slightly upwards. ,,I will see again" was just one of the many thoughts that went through her mind. ,,Do you know which model?" she asked and Quaritch shook his head before realizing that she didn't see it.

,,No, now get in here, we're here," she heard the commanding tone before he opened the door again before they stepped into a larger room. She heard the whirring and beeping of a machine.

She knew the sound from somewhere, but she couldn't remember it. ,,Wilder, glad you're here," she heard the voice of her actual recruiters. ,,Why all this fuss about eye models or a check for an operation I could have picked up myself," she said, folding her arms in front of her chest.

Despite this, her heart was beating fast with anticipation. When silence fell between the people, she gulped. ,,Is it not an operation or a model...how am I supposed to see again?" she asked, taking a step toward the two men.

,,Your father Y/n never wondered why the government or the RDA never paid you and your mother proper compensation" he started talking and she didn't like where this was going. ,,They paid for my studies, that's all, what does this have to do with my father?" she asked, looking from the recruiter to Quaritch.

,,He knew of her passion, but also of her suffering," he continued, and at the word suffering she tensed slightly. Suffering, the word kept echoing in her head, she hated it. ,,Get to the point," she demanded, looking at them both in warning of what they were not telling her.

,,Your father wanted us to give you something you always wanted instead of money or other help". ,,Now tell me," she demanded and took another step towards him. ,,Your own Avatar," he said, and it hit her almost like a blow.

In disbelief, she stepped away from him and clutched her necklace. ,,What?" she muttered, looking back and forth between Quaritch and the other, confused and upset. ,,Come," Quaritch said, putting a hand on her shoulder before taking her further into the room.

It was warm, yet his grip was heavy with a hint of command. She felt goose bumps coming on her skin. But whether it came from the colonel or the things she had just experienced, she didn't know.

The whirring and beeping grew louder until she reached out and moved her hand in front of her. It's a tank, she realized in shock as she touched the round glass and felt the slight chill behind it. ,,Why me?" she asked, still confused and upset, her grip on the chain tightening.

,,We were going to give them protheses for the protocol, but someone was convincing," she heard the soldier hiss, and she looked at Quaritch, who had been watching her the whole time. Quaritch...he stood up for me, the realization flashed through her mind.

And the colors as they looked at him seemed so incredibly close. She would have liked to thank him. ,,It would be a waste of resources, and I'm tired of leading you through this," she heard Quaritch confess before she realized that he had given her her avatar.

She felt her emotions surge through her body, her hand trembling slightly as she still grasped the chain and leaned her other hand against the glass.

Tears had gathered in her eyes as she saw bluish colors as she looked to her avatar. This small hope in her was painfully shattered by him. The thing with her father, her avatar. It seemed too much to take in.

And yet she cursed herself for her naivety in believing that she would not be a burden to the colonel. ,,Fortunately for you, I will be able to see again tomorrow," she said warningly, but the pain and fragility of her voice was clearly audible before she walked past them. ,,Thank you Colonel," she said as she stopped at the door before opening it and walking out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist : @mooniequeen , @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed